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jonathankatwhatever · 2 years

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Still 20 Mar 2023. If I appear to be working frantically, this is not much different from normal, except I feel a bit more driven to type because, to be blunt, I am more and more convinced that the math is deeply, deeply, deeply correct, and that it is creating an image in me which expresses itself in what I think.

So when I start to think you must know the Ending, that is a zK versus sK distinction. Despite the labels, I think of myself as sK to you and you are sK to me; we share but it’s that unmixed which early Christianity developed as the way to identify Jesus. That makes this point: we forget they were figuring this out, that they were arguing this through, with the idea that this would fix their understanding of this actual divine process. It wasn’t a bunch of guys believing this versus a bunch of guys believing that; it was arguments about the path by which saving can occur.

That is the idea with us, that we have the cooperative ability to develop awareness, and this cooperation will lift us all as it lifts the individuals who do that work. For example, a cooperative thread will terminate without a fuss, because it’s just an instance of a thread, so take that perspective and 1-0Segment it so you see what you really can give up, what you really need and want, as viewed over a series of Counters by an Observer represented in each Observer. I include that to note, for example, that I often change inside me, and I lose track of who I am or what I’ve been lately in my head, and yet those thoughts clearly fit within longer patterns, exactly like the music I play, and as noted constantly in my notes, when I am surprised by the return of some old bit as it combines with something else to create a new insight.

Those bits are actual objects, meaning they are pieces of a structure, perhaps even of an End that can be reconstructed like Osiris. Or the way I have been.

It really is phenomenal in the explicitly good sense. In recent days, I’ve been able to turn my walking almost entirely to left control, which seems to be another form of LC, meaning that control within the larger context in which Things interact is the internal self addressing that, which is then Injection, right? I mean there’s always Injection to fill a space, so this would inject at the Bip which joins the 4IC which make up the LC, which then maps as a gs(m) for the pole at the Bip. See? Isn’t that lovely? We just took inner control as left control and noted that meant, for me, at least an LC relationship which I then could see as math. The point isn’t the initials, because someone else is RC, but rather it’s the type of symbolic coincidences which sometimes point the way into an understanding. A happy coincidence is fate in the sense that this brought together D4-3 threads which reduce to the End at D3-4, and it could also be seen as random. I tend to think it’s because I’m inundated with signs, which aren’t the kind that tell you exactly what to do or where to go but are omens or symbols within other complex expressions that could have significantly different modularities. That is, say I get something like I know I’m going to be with you as a bit, as a structure, and that comes back as it did a few hours ago, then it’s token value as a symbol has changed, but I wouldn’t know that, not for certain, until that Winding, which we saw earlier today follows that skip pattern which impels Triangular rotation. With direction being at the Ends of that 1-0Segment. This is an identity check.

So, what does it mean to know the End? Eternity? Before Eternity? It’s the latter, though I’m having trouble articulating why. I have that it has to invert over to together, which means together so that can invert, which is the why of creating this depth across the space between us. And that speaks to your immense planning capabilities.

Is that correct? Is that the math? Over the boundary. Talk about a religious conversation. We covered the transfer at an End as the 1-0Segment flip which imposes a 0 in Dimensional Reduction, so that transfer terminates the gs process for that thread in that Register, meaning where it is real, so a 0 can appear. That seems to get the math down. We have an attachment and thus Attachment Theory, which explores how you attach structures. Is it correct to say this is grid squares or is this a complex space which sits in and over grid squares? Can I clarify that? To say something is in grid squares is to say it is a D3-4 or D4-3 existence and that it occurs within grid squares, meaning within the DC&R processes that put it there in every sense.

So, how does this fit to the sense that I have to shut up. That’s the same thing as pain relief, which has worked so well, I can now do jumps off my bad toe and it works fine, with less and less pain over time. That is, I tend to listen to the voice of panic, which tends to appear in any transition or deviation, which is why I was set off by being lied to to get me into the doctor’s so I’d get a shot: set off panic response, which they did not understand.

So, would I have done this if I hadn’t been switched? That’s a very good question. If I were under LC, I’d be successful in life but not at this work. I know that because putting me back together again has been the way I’ve been able to construct the math. Oh, so the counting requires back 1 to right, which is the roadmap for control that is LC but which approaches right control without giving it entirely over, which sets LC as default. RC would be the usual: count to left to right to left. Runs the other way too.

Like in the stories, she preserves the work because she carries it inside her. It’s hard to give birth.

So, I couldn’t have done this without this process, which includes the confusions. What a great way to excuse my own failings! Which I’m not doing, but this allows me to own them to a sensible place where I can see what they meant for good and bad. And I was trying to associate this with an idea that keeps slipping away: I’m terrible at a lot of life management because that is zK when I’m sK, and my zK works through LC. This means we have that model correct when saying it’s the twisted untwisting, which has the effect of aligning to and from the Ends better, so the signals identify the Ends properly. That means it’s an attachment at the Thing level, meaning at the iObject level, and that means we don’t have to reassemble the actual End but rather reassemble the image of it, which is a version of Banach-Tarski’s multiple balls from one.

Isn’t that a cool idea? Assemble the images of the End, with its facets, not the actual End, which would require a lot of gs process.

Not looking forward to the feelings of dread tomorrow, but I am curious to see if the new understanding helps. These little panic gears, are like running up the RPM’s on the tachometer. It takes a lot of torque and rotation to get the car moving and up to speed. That’s all gs process. So they fill space by spinning and that gets a larger object to spin, faster and faster, so whatever was ignored to speed up is ignored as it is speeding.

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elysiansparadise · 2 years

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Chiron: Our wounds in the chart

⚷ Chiron is a comet-asteroid that helps us spot some of our wounds. In addition to that, Chiron usually symbolizes the way in which we can heal, as well as show a little charisma through the chart, however in this post I will only talk about wounds and healing. You can get to know yours on Astro.com in the section “additional objects”.

🟫Chiron in 1st house: The wounds fall on oneself, the natives with this placement may have problems accepting themselves, both some facets of their personality and themselves. Self-esteem issues, dissatisfaction with your body, and a desire for a change in your body. The natives have problems to show themselves as they are, to be themselves when surrounded by other people, they are somewhat introverted. They help others to feel better about themselves, to see their good and positive sides, but many times they cannot see something bright in themselves. They question themselves a lot, they may have a tendency to doubt themselves and be somewhat insecure.

🟤Chiron in Aries: The wound lies in the feeling of not being able to be themselves without feeling judged. Ego wounds. Tendency to repress anger. Feeling that in the past they were very submissive and not wanting to be so anymore. Fear of taking the initiative. Much focus on body imperfections that others do not notice.

🤎Ways to work on this: Make a list of things you are good at. Look in the mirror and say loving or positive words to yourself. Find ways to express yourself. Wear comfortable clothes that allow you to feel good about your body. Do not compare yourself with people and progress independently. Accept yourself little by little and just as you are aware of your flaws, become aware of your virtues. Take the advice you give to others. By helping others you help yourself.

🟫Chiron in 2nd house: Insecurity lies in self-worth and self-esteem. The native can be very critical of themselves, they can feel that they aren’t safe no matter where they are. They feel that they have never known stability, and may have had a life with many ups and downs and a sense of little consistency from others. They may not fully enjoy indulging or spoiling themselves. Fear of becoming too attached to things or people.They may feel empty inside, as if something is missing to be completely happy. These natives always make others feel good about who they are, show them that they are enough, that they are beautiful, and open their eyes to see all the good that surrounds them.

🟤Chiron in Taurus: They do not feel stability in their life or in their relationships. Feeling of not being worth as much as others. They do not value themselves or their abilities. They may either have a tendency to develop some kind of attachment or have difficulty sticking to something. Dissatisfied with the way your body looks.

🤎Ways to work on this: Look in the mirror and tell yourself that you value yourself. Buy nice details. Organize your space and throw away the things that you no longer use or do not serve you. Try to get some exercise to clear your mind or go for a walk. Find and play with your style and aesthetic. Sleep when you need to, eat when you need to, listen to your body. Massage your body, your legs and buy essences to purify your environment. Take long showers or baths.

🟫Chiron in 3rd house: The wounds can come from the native's school days, they could have difficulties connecting with others and even difficulties feeling ready or able to learn. They can talk to themselves in a brusque and somewhat insensitive way. Some of them have been judged for their way of thinking and their opinions, people could make them feel unintelligent. They tend to doubt their abilities. You may have trouble connecting with others, feel like you don't make yourself understood, that others don't listen to you, or that what you say isn't important when in fact, it’s really important. You are an excellent listener and an amazing counselor, your words heal and are valuable.

🟤Chiron in Gemini: The voice in their minds can be a bit cruel and overly critical. They don't trust their thoughts. They doubt a lot. Wounds caused by brothers or cousins. Feeling of not being understood when you want to say something. They feel that they are not being heard or that others don’t appreciate what they are saying.

🤎Ways to work on this: Keep a journal where you constantly vent. Writing can be healing for you. Sing. Look for activities to spend your mental energy. Take walks with music to relax. Write the ideas you have. Draw. Talk to the people you love, say what you feel you want and don't care what others think. Write a letter to yourself, either telling how your day was or a love letter to yourself. Learn on your own and don't be afraid to ask questions.

🟫Chiron in 4th house: Yesterday's wounds feel as fresh as the sun through the window of a new day. The native has an excellent memory, so excellent that it makes them remember things that hurt them in the past. Carry many emotional wounds in relation to the family, parents and childhood. Could have had a sad and lonely childhood, feeling left out by family. May not have allowed you to be sensitive or have judged them for being very emotional, so they keep what they feel to themselves and may feel uncomfortable having to talk about their emotions and heaviness. Feeling of having lost home. You make others feel comfortable and safe, you do not judge their emotions and you emotionally nurture like no one else.

🟤Chiron in Cancer: There are wounds caused by childhood and the mother. You may feel that your emotions and needs are ignored or unappreciated. Feeling unloved. Fear of being too sensible or vulnerable in others eyes. Difficulty opening up. Fear of being abandoned or feeling that they were abandoned. Fear of being forgotten.

🤎Ways to work on this: Hug yourself. Cook or eat something you like. Write everything you feel. Watch movies you watched in your childhood. Find activities that nurture your inner child. You can meditate. Sleep when you're sleepy, not when you're bored or sad. Cry if you feel like you want to. Satisfy your needs before those of the rest. Swim a little. Take a long bath. Identify your emotions and look for solutions just as you do with others.

🟫Chiron in 5th house: The wound lies in the self-expression and the ego. These natives may feel unappreciated or undervalued, and may deal with the feeling of being ignored and judged by others. May be judged for being “not so rational” when young, becoming more reserved and self-conscious. They may have trouble believing in the potential of their talents or even seeing themselves as talented. They are afraid that others will see them as immature, ridiculous or very incoherent. They decide to be guided more by the mind due to the distrust of being guided by the heart and getting hurt or badly off. They help others see their brilliance and be who they really are without fear of public opinion.

🟤Chiron in Leo: Their fears often block their creativity. Fear that others will harm them and make them feel inferior. Lack of spontaneity. Fear of being ignored or being judged by others. An internal desire to shine and to be recognized for their virtues, for being who they are. Desire to be accepted.

🤎Ways to work on this: Express yourself through art, writing, dance, painting, music. Look in the mirror and say that you love yourself and that you are worth it. Recognize your virtues and talents first. Make a list of everything you're good at. Make a list of virtues that define you. Do the things you want because you want to, not to impress others. Get rid of the opinion of others. Become aware of virtues and flaws, value yourself for the good and work on the bad.

🟫Chiron in 6th house: The wound falls in living in the expectations and trying to be perfect. Natives with this placement have difficulty relaxing, they are prone to demanding a lot from themselves and setting very high standards for themselves. Work hard to improve themselves, too critical of what they do and very hard once they make a mistake. Could feel that family or superiors put more pressure on them. They need to feel productive and useful, they enjoy helping others both on a practical and emotional level, but they do not allow themselves to be helped. Make others aware that they don't have to be perfect, that they are great just the way they are and make them treat themselves more gently.

🟤Chiron in Virgo: Excessive desire for self-control and not showing vulnerability. Inability to accept or ask for help. You can help others so much that you forget to help yourself. You feel like you never do enough or that you don't do it that well. They may have overthinking and anxiety problems.

🤎Ways to work on this: Interact with animals, pet a cat or a dog. Clean your room or area where you spend more time. Water the plants. Go shopping. Make lists where you set small goals and reward yourself when you achieve them. Give yourself a compliment in front of the mirror. When you finish doing something, thank yourself for having done valuable work. After helping others, give yourself some time to fix your own problems. Make it a habit to write in a journal.

🟫Chiron in 7th house: The wound falls in relationships and in the way of interacting with other people. Many people may feel that they connect easily with the native, that they are understood and appreciated, but the native has trouble connecting with others, feeling loved or comfortable with other people. You can have problems in your relationships attracting hurt people, with problems or in the worst cases, victimized people. They have a tendency to keep their distance from others so as not to get hurt, they fear the idea of infidelity or that their partner does not trust them. They are people with a lot of tact and understanding of the pain of others, empathetic and people trust them easily.

🟤Chiron in Libra: They have trouble finding a balance between others and themselves. They feel that their lives are out of balance. Trouble opening up romantically or with a partner. Sensation of being alone even if accompanied. Wounds from injustice and betrayal. Feeling that you must always be alert.

🤎Ways to work on this: Get together with fewer people but give you a more positive relationship. Be open to meeting people. Identify what went wrong in other relationships and learn from those mistakes. Go shopping and dress as you like. Analyze and give yourself the time to get to know people before you open up. Do not let others' issues eclipse yours. Practice some kind of art. Give yourself time to heal before opening yourself up to a new relationship [love or friendship].

🟫Chiron in 8th house: The wound lies in the betrayals of the past that are etched in their minds. Tendency to blame themselves for things that weren’t in their control. Fear of generating some type of attachment with another person, since it is not easy for them to trust others and their intentions. When someone betrays them, they prefer to close their hearts with a triple lock and never trust others again. May be issues related to a person who should have been there for the native but never was, a feeling of little support. Wounds related to sexuality or sexual life. Some may judge you based on your sexual preferences or your sex life. They give others intensity and stability, they never judge, they only understand.

🟤Chiron in Scorpio: Some of these natives fear losing a loved one, they fear change or being very close to someone. They don't forget or forgive easily if you hurt them. There is a strong emotional wound related to lies, betrayal, deception, or estrangement. Either afraid or fascinated by death. Fear of being dependent.

🤎Ways to work on this: Shadow work, use esotericism in your favor. Astrology to understand you better and accept you. Swim or do other activities in the water. Forgive, practice forgetting if you can't forgive and stay away from those who don't bring you anything positive. Meditate or do some sport to vent your emotions. Establish healthy boundaries and break down some blocks that you put between yourself and others.

🟫Chiron in 9th house: The wounds of the native fall on the issue of faith and feeling discriminated. They are people who for things in life have become skeptical, have lost faith that there is goodness in the world, and have even lost faith in themselves and their abilities. People can offend or annoy them because of their way of thinking, because of their beliefs, or because of things like their gender, their religion, or their race. They could have coexisted with people who are intolerant. May have problems with teachers. They make others feel full and happy very easily, they like to surround themselves with people who are different from them and do not discriminate against them for their differences.

🟤Chiron in Sagittarius: Problems seeing the bright side of life, tendency to skepticism and excessive pessimism. They constantly feel judged. Problems for being different or having opinions that differ from those of the family. Lack of faith in life. Feeling that people do not understand your point of view.

🤎Ways to work on this: Look for answers to the questions you have. Write your dreams and things that make you happy. Remember that happiness is moments not eternity, do things that give you happiness even if it is momentary. Travel, physically or spiritually. Learn about a topic that interests you. When you think about the bad, make a list of the good. Try new things and connect with people from other places.

🟫Chiron in 10th house: The wound of these natives is tied to their need to want to go far and fear of failure. The native's parents could have demanded a lot from them, but at the same time not having valued the achievements that the natives had and simply asking for more and more. The native fears being judged, but wants their efforts to be recognized. They are afraid of failing, making mistakes and that people will point them out for it. It is likely that they grew up in a tense environment and had to learn to have inner peace despite external chaos. Problems with the father and/or authority figures. They give a sense of peace and stability to others, ease to guide them and value their efforts.

🟤Chiron in Capricorn: Feeling of being in the crosshairs and constant judgment of your father. Misunderstandings with him. They feel that much is required of them and that others have results more easily than they do. Lack of recognition for their work. Problems with authority figures. They matured before their time.

🤎Ways to work on this: Reward yourself once you achieve something no matter how small you think it is. Allow yourself to feel angry. Acknowledge your own efforts before wanting others to do so. Write a list of your goals and aspirations. Write your talents and abilities that you have. Be patient with yourself and do not want immediate results. Look at yourself in the mirror and tell how capable you are to achieve whatever you want.

🟫Chiron in 11th house: The wound falls into the feeling of not belonging and being invisible. These natives may have difficulty finding their place in a group of people, they may feel that they do not fit in with people their age because of how they think, with their "friends" or even with their family. Loneliness hurts them but they have already gotten used to it in a certain way. Some fear being themselves and adapt to what is trendy to fit in, many others prefer not to fit in and continue to be themselves, whatever it is, they rarely feel like they belong. They may feel that society or others do not accept them. They have the ability to accept others as they are and make friends with anyone.

🟤Chiron in Aquarius: They feel that it is there for friends but they are not there for the native. Trouble feeling like you fit in and having friends. Friendships that hurt them. They feel judged because others see them as weird. You feel misunderstood, abandoned and ignored. Fear that their freedom will be taken away. Some fear of commitment.

🤎Ways to work on this: Be selective about the people you surround yourself with. Meet people through the internet. In your privacy, dance and sing like crazy. Get rid of the opinion of others. Put creative ideas you have into action. Make a list of what makes you unique. Have a blog. Enjoy your time alone trying new things, or doing what you like the most. Understand that you are not the problem or others, you just haven't met the right people. Get creative and authentic.

🟫Chiron in 12th house: The wounds fall on the feeling that their suffering is ignored or less important than that of others. They tend to hide when they suffer, when they are sad or emotionally ill because they feel that it is not something that others pay attention to, or that they are not very interested in. They have a tendency to solve other people's problems so as not to think about their own. They are more sensitive and understanding with others than with themselves. They may fear looking or feeling victimized by seeing their own problems. They may have been made to think or feel that their suffering was not of great importance. They are sensitive, compassionate and true healers and love to help others.

🟤Chiron in Pisces: They are defensive because they feel very vulnerable. They fear that others will use them and their empathy. They may feel insecure about themselves. They want to help others but they do not help themselves. Some may have faith problems. They put others before themselves.

🤎Ways to work on this: Write what you feel, paint something that reflects how you feel. Balance your time with others and alone. Meditate or do some yoga. Make a playlist for yourself, write yourself positive notes, listen to music, sing. Have creative isolations from time to time, but don't forget to connect with others. Daydream when you have free time. Taking a bath with rose petals or rosemary. Write what you dream.

⚷ Next we will talk about Chiron's aspects. I limited myself to write about certain planets or angles, making either a positive or tense aspect with Chiron to make it easy to read.

🟫Making aspects with Sun: These natives quickly identify when others have problems with something about themselves. They know how to raise the self-esteem of those they love and how to help them improve their relationship with themselves. These natives have problems accepting themselves, it is likely that they have made them doubt or be very ashamed of some traits of their personality. The relationship with the father can be complicated. Your relationship with yourself can be complicated. Tendency to self-sabotage. The problems with the father are stronger, since the actions of the father could deeply hurt the native. They are an empathetic and understanding person of others, always willing to support someone who is going through a difficult time. They use their experiences and situations to help others find solutions to their problems. Knows how to listen. Excellent advisers. Make others feel better about themselves.

🟫Making aspects with the Moon: They easily heal other people's emotions, they are trustworthy and people feel safe with them. They may have problems with the mother, have a mother who has had very difficult experiences or a mother that tends to victimize herself. They can perfectly remember past wounds and take time to recover from them. They feel insecure when it comes to projecting their emotions and prefer to keep them to themselves, it can be difficult for them to form emotional bonds due to insecurities or past issues. It is difficult for them to open up emotionally because of the fear or being too vulnerable or others taking advantage because of that. They are extremely sensitive to the suffering of others, they like to take care of those who are most vulnerable. If they have children, the problems of their children will hurt the natives deeply. They may feel that childhood was somewhat complicated and that their needs were not fully met.

🟫Making aspects with Mercury: Tendency to constantly remember embarrassments and difficult moments of the past. The relationship with siblings can be either very bad or very healing. They are great at understanding other people's problems and looking for solutions, but not for their own problems. They may question their own intelligence, feel inadequate, or feel that it is difficult for them to learn. They may tell you that their voice is very low [unless it’s in a fire sign], some may have dyslexia or stutter. School life could have been complex. Their wound could cause the native to generate nervousness. Their words have a healing quality and in fact many may like the sound of their voice [especially with aspects like trine or sextile], they help others a lot and their advice is often very welcome by others. They have a lot of knowledge of how to help others and understand them. May have an interest in psychology and anything to comprehend how wounds work and how to heal.

🟫Making aspects with Venus: The subject of love can be somewhat complex. You can attract or seek to be healed through love or heal your loved one. They seek a relationship in which both heal and fully trust each other. Fear of being cheated on or that your partner is lying to you. Great counselors of love even if they consider that they do not have much experience. They love in a very pure way and may have this tendency to not see the flaws in their partner. They may have issues accepting their beauty or feeling attractive. Art can be very healing for them and their artistic work may be able to heal others. They are perfect companions who always help those they love, and may feel unloved at times. Fear that someone is with them just to use them. Their love has a healing quality, they make those they love feel in a unique and beautiful way. The native may have problems with female figures or embracing their femenine side regardless of their gender.

🟫Making aspects with Mars: They may be afraid of taking the initiative for many things, of seeing themselves as too aggressive, but they are also afraid of seeing themselves as too weak. They are excellent leaders who will always defend those who need it or who cannot defend themselves. They may have grown up or been in a very tense, aggressive, or violent environment, which makes them feel like they must always be defensive or alert. They have very well defined boundaries and will do anything to make people respect them. People feel safe and protected by them. Afraid of being seen as fragile, they cover up their issues, problems and rather deal with it independently. They may have problems with male figures in their life. They learned not to rely on others to save them from their problems and instead saved themselves. They can motivate and encourage others to do the same. Tendency to repress anger or desires for fear of taking risks.

🟫Making aspects with Jupiter: They have a facility for understanding and helping others in their emotional crises, both emotionally and in a practical sense. They are very sensitive people and can be easily hurt. They can grow a lot spiritually after overcoming their problems and helping others to get ahead. You may have trouble trusting your own charm and luck, in fact you may sometimes feel like you're out of luck. They can have abundance and luck once they help heal others. You can put so much focus on helping others that you forget to help yourself. They seek to bring positivity to those in need. These people have a lot of spiritual maturity that allows them to learn from negative experiences and the positive aspects of Chiron-Jupiter makes them overcome problems more easily and makes others overcome things more easily too. With the tense aspects it may cost you a bit and you may not see it that way, but you will have the good side.

🟫Making aspects with Saturn: These natives do not treat themselves delicately, they can demand a lot of themselves even after having emotional issues. They may have problems with their dads or authority figures. They do not like to depend on someone to solve their problems. They are excellent at finding quick solutions to other people's problems. They may have trouble having a little fun for themselves or allowing themselves to enjoy life a little, at the same time they feel that they need to be more organized, rational or methodical. They may have a feeling of abandonment or coldness that comes from a somewhat unhappy or difficult childhood. They may have problems with frequent sadness, periods of depression or little desire to do their daily activities. Cold outside, warm on the inside. They prefer to be on their own and are in constant alert. They have a hard time healing but they manage to be the person they would have liked so much to have in the past.

🟫Making aspects with Uranus: They may feel that there is a problem with them, that there is something wrong that they cannot connect with others easily. They can find healing through being alone, with friends or on the internet doing other activities. There may be problems with some relatives due to incompatibilities. Despite being well alone, they fear that they will never be accepted, that they will be marginalized and alienated. They make others learn to be fine on their own, to feel proud of who they are. The natives go a long way to find beauty in what makes them different. They seek to heal their group, it is usual to see them as the counselors of a group of friends or of some community. They can be very good at healing the inner chaos of others, but not so good at their own. Once they accept their own quirks, they will begin to attract people who love their quirks as much as they do, and who share ways of thinking.

🟫Making aspects with Neptune: They feel the need to help the other person, here we have the true empaths, people who have a natural healing quality. They are amazing at providing emotional support, perhaps sometimes more than practical. They sense the wounds of others but may ignore or not know how to handle their own. Sometimes they feel other people's wounds as their own, they can be too empathetic and that can harm them. People feel good about your presence and readily accept your help. It is easy for them to know when a person or even an animal is having a bad time. Others may have made them feel invisible and even forgettable. They have a noble and loving heart that they are afraid to show for fear of being deceived or hurt. But there is something genuinely beautiful in them, and it is that their tenderness and good treatment are not easily forgotten, they make others believe that there are good people in the world.

🟫Making aspects with Pluto: There is something very powerful in them, they manage to transform themselves at a deep level, to be reborn after a crisis, whatever it may be. They are really strong and powerful, they take their time to heal, but healing for them does not usually include forgiving and forgetting as such. They can be somewhat spiteful if you hurt them and they never forget how you make them feel. They may have felt some kind of rejection or hatred in their childhood. These people definitely change the lives of those around them, they have a great intuition to know about the emotions and wounds of the other, they know how to understand and heal them like no one else can. If there is something they have, it is that they know themselves perfectly and seek to transform and make something beautiful and inspiring of their pain.

🟫Making aspects with Rising: These natives may have a facility for healing other people and may actively seek to help others overcome their problems and overcome traumas of any kind. They are very observant and aware of the difficulties and problems of others. However, they have problems healing their own wounds, they are very critical and demanding with them. They hesitate before daring to do something, they usually do not show themselves completely for fear of being judged. Perhaps from a very young age they felt attracted to the topic of helping and healing others. Interest in meditation, therapy or psychology. They like to come across as a strong person with whom you can vent, someone kind who understands your wounds. They always treat others as they would like to be treated. They may have trouble accepting the way their body looks and may see flaws in themselves that others don't pay attention to.

🟫Making aspects with Midheaven: These natives can easily gain the appreciation and trust of the people, because they seem approachable, kind and polite. People can see them as a person who has been through a lot and still has a noble heart. They actively seek to be a person who helps people get ahead and heal through work. They may have a job related to helping others, or at least a job where they inspire others to excel. They may have many problems or differences with authorities. They may feel that it is difficult for them to go far and may doubt their abilities to improve themselves. People tend to see in them a good leader, someone who actively strives to improve the emotional state of the people. If the aspect is tense, people will still find comfort and trust in them, but they will also know that the native is not dealing with their own wounds. You can find a lot of academic and professional success once you heal your emotional world.

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apompkwrites · 3 years

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reader impact || fan service scene: resting with you

series masterlist characters: diluc, xiao, zhongli genre: fluff summary: the creators of genshin impact have graciously gifted the players with a fan service scene featuring you! notes: i know dill's doesn't contain sleeping in your lap,,, i'm sorry but i hope you like what i provided :))

diluc -

diluc isn't one to have many sleep issues.

until the nightmares kick in.

whenever he can't sleep, he tends to just sit in his house.

it's always quiet.

not something you'd want after a nightmare, but he deals with it.

it's better than trying to expose himself to thousands or even millions of people.

but one night, after a particularly harsh nightmare, he remembers that the next day was supposed to be when he streams the newest genshin update.

but, he's already up...

and...

he probably will try to take a nap later today anyway...

soooo.

"i know it's a bit of an early, or late, stream but i was already awake."

his stream is definitely worried because this is the first time he streams at like 2:00 am.

he won't address it, though.

they don't need to know, anyway.

he pretty much tries to ignore any questions about his sleeping habits and opts to answer them very vaguely.

he is excited to play the update because he knows there's some more (name) content :))

he'll get everything done that he needs to do like commissions and events from them nice nice primogems.

and then here he is, ready to start the newest feature.

go to the angel's share.

ah yes, the place his character officially met you for the first time.

(he definitely has issues with interacting with patton before going inside)

the quest basically has diluc go around to collect more things needed for the winery.

pretty simple quest.

canonically, the quest takes the mc a few hours to complete because the materials are everywhere.

so a cutscene plays when he gets back to the dawn winery, which is where charles told him to bring the materials.

he walks inside and there you are.

greeting him with a brief nod and a wave of your hand.

mc drops the items on the table, ready to turn around and leave for another commission.

until you call out to him.

"ah, traveler."

mc turns back around and walks back to stand next to you.

you stand up from your chair and place a hand on their shoulder.

you stare at them for a moment.

"...i apologize. you must have been traveling for a long while to get the materials."

mc tries to wave you off.

"no, no. you'll hurt yourself. hm... come with me."

you literally CARRY MC TO A SPARE ROOM.

EXCUSE ME YOU CAN'T JUST DO THAT SO CASUALLY?!?!?!

anyway, you pull up a chair next to the bed before placing the mc on the bed.

you simply sit in the chair, quietly stroking your thumb along the mc's arm.

"take a break. i'm sure the adventurer's guild will do just fine for now."

diluc is trying his hardest to hold back tears.

he just... really needed this.

xiao -

it's widely known amongst xiao's community that he has insomnia.

he talks about it a lot on how he has trouble sleeping and he even streams on the nights where it gets so bad he doesn't like being alone with his thoughts.

such is the case here where a new update drops and he's up and ready to play.

he greets everyone briefly as they enter the stream, rubbing his eyes and letting out small yawns every once in a while.

they always know when it's an especially hard night for him, so they come prepared with (name) emotes to try and cheer him up.

they don't have the heart to spoil him about the new update and what it includes.

of course, there will always be that one person who tries to spoil something.

the chat sees that and just spams (name) emotes to hide it.

and since xiao is pretty sleep deprived at this point, he doesn't notice.

now he's ready to actually play.

he'll complete his daily commissions and anything else he needs to get done before checking out the newest features.

he does know that there's a part in the update that features you :0

he doesn't know what the actual update is but he just knows that he'll be able to see you again :))

so he's going through the update, right?

just admiring you even if he's half asleep.

and here comes the part that actually almost put him to sleep right there.

his mc and you are walking down the streets of liyue and it's all dark.

there's a few lights here and there.

you two are walking down to the inn he had first met you at.

passing by the boss lady at the front counter.

walking up the stairs.

and there you two are, on the very balcony he ad first seen you on.

"...you seem tired."

his character doesn't say anything (as expected) but just rubs their eyes and nods.

pain is floating beside you two before going off towards the kitchen downstairs.

now it's just you two.

"you should take a rest."

your voice was so soft :))

you look around the balcony before sighing, taking a seat on the ground.

his character stares at you for a bit before you pat your legs.

"i told you to rest, didn't i?"

?!?!?!?!

YOU'RE TELLING HIM

TO LAY DOWN

ON YOUR LAP????

ASJHAKDHAK

ahem.

anyway.

his character takes a bit before finally letting their head rest in your lap.

he's thanking whoever animated this part because it's a POV shot from the mc.

he's just staring up at you.

you're looking down at him with the softest expression he's ever seen.

"...rest now. i won't let anything harm you."

his chat is freaking out.

he's almost asleep at this point.

life is good.

zhongli -

zhongli doesn't have a lot of sleep issues either...

if he did, he'd probably just drink some tea and try to sleep again.

he isn't the type of stream late at night/early in the morning.

because of this, he plays the newest update for genshin at his scheduled time.

some people who watch him are going to bed though, so it's late at night/early in the morning for them :)

he knows this and tries to tell his viewers to get proper rest.

"it isn't good for you to stay up so late."

he really cares about them :))

he's happy to talk to them though.

(he definitely knows people like his voice so he's happy to help them sleep by talking to them)

his daily objectives take longer considering he's taking the time to read to his viewers.

of course, all of the things he's reading are genshin based.

more specifically you, but they don't mind.

anyway, he FINALLY gets his stuff done.

now he's finally ready to start the new (name) quest.

he's like... one or two hours into the stream already.

but he doesn't mind longer stream, especially when it concerns you.

go to third round knockout

ah yes, the little restaurant you go to for stories about yourself.

and, of course, there you are sitting at your usual chair and drinking tea.

you invite him over to sit down, which causes another cutscene to play, talking more about your adventures as a god/dess.

and, to zhongli's delight, the quest fully begins.

the quest follows you and mc going around lie, exploring different areas while you talk about what you've done there in the years you've been alive.

it's a more chill quest that features lore and character building :))

and then you get to a more secluded spot in lieu.

just the two of you.

the sun has already set and the stars are shining down on the two of you.

zhongli isn't saying anything, reveling in the silence as if he were actually there, standing next to you.

and then your character takes a seat in the grass.

and mc follows suit, sitting beside you.

it isn't long before zhongli's character begins to drift off to sleep.

and that's when it happens.

you reach over and pull mc into your lap, your storytelling continuing as if nothing happened.

"this may be awkward, but i noticed you were falling asleep. go on ahead. i'll be happy to share my stories to help you rest."

zhongli, once again, isn't saying anything. he simply lets the cutscene play.

you're still recalling tales of your past, calmly telling them to whoever was listening.

it's calm and quiet.

and zhongli now knows why people love hearing him tell stories as they sleep.

because he is definitely getting that same sensation hearing you recall your past.

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roscgcld · 4 years

Text

HEADCANON + GOJO SATORU || the gojo twins

request: HELLO^^ so I’ve been wondering this so long but do you think it would even be possible if Gojo had a twin sister that also has the sixth eye ? Probably not but, I’d kinda want to know what the clans higher ups and curses react to 2 sixth eye user.

note: I am glad I am not the only one thinking about this lol. like what if they were two gojos? absolute chaos the world has ever seen. i love it, this entire prompt lives in my head rent free lol

pronouns: she/her

gojotwins!au masterlist

imagine the other clan’s reactions when they learn that not one, but two of the gojo clan’s newest heirs were born with the highly coveted Six Eyes?

gojo satoru and y/n - the newest members of the gojo clan, twins that are born with the Six Eyes. a first case that has ever happened in the family’s history. it was this monumental moment when the higher ups realise that things are going to be interesting

by the way - you’re the older twin lol. just so you can poke jabs at gojo for the rest of your life by using the line. “i’m the older sibling here!”

“only by like, two minutes!”

that being said though, over-protective twin brother who will scare all your boyfriends/girlfriends the first time they meet because of his height and overly nice personality that scares people even more

you’re just as bad though - if any girl or guy walks out of his room after a night of fun you will probably be a little bitch and make them feel awkward until gojo wakes up

“can’t you be a little nicer to them?” gojo groans after the person he slept with last night quickly left after an awkward cup of morning coffee with you. “I actually liked them a lot.”

but it’s all done with love, and if the other realise their significant other makes them happy, they will back off

the moment you two entered jujutsu tech, then yaga-sensei was about to hand in his retirement slip early with the sheer chaos that his year of students were bringing him

ieiri was delighted that she wasn’t going to be the only girl at school; geto was amused how you two were basically copy and paste of each other, just in different genders

surprisingly enough, think you’d be the one who’d be the more studious and definitely more interesting in learning how to hone your skills better - gojo probably still has this ‘i am the strongest’ mentality that the elders planted in him because ✨misogyny✨

but he loves to compete with you - and you’re the only one who’d he ever admit defeat to, and will defend your honour whenever the elders talk down on you because you’re a girl. and to them, girls are just meant to be ‘a pretty face with strong genes to bring a strong generation into the world’

he’s probably the one who talked your elders out of arranging a marriage between you and an heir to another important family like the kamo clan - because there is no way in hell is he going to let some random ass man take you away from him

probably joking told you that if all else fails, to marry geto on the spot - and let’s be honest here, who wouldn’t? Geto looks so damn fine both the anime and especially in the Gojo Past Arch. rail me daddy-

*cough cough*

anyway - ever since that comment, geto and you might pretend to flirt with each other to get gojo riled up. playfully brushing your hand along his arm, playing with his hair between your fingers whenever you two talk, geto leaning close to you to whisper something in your ear with a smirk, or him resting his hand around your waist whenever he leads you about

it always gets gojo riled up, and he’d get in between the both of you; whining for you to give him attention instead

you probably sneak into his room, even as you got older, to hide in his arms whenever you have a nightmare - and he’d wordlessly just hold you close and cuddle you to sleep again no matter how old you two are

both of you share the same braincell - same reactions, expressions, and sometimes even finishing each other’s sentences. sometimes you two even say the same thing at the same time, to which you two just high five each other with a laugh

freaks everyone out a little, since it’s just so random and natural for the both of you to do it

nanami hates it whenever he has to accompany you two - as his senpais, he can’t complain much. he does learn a lot, yet at the same time, he can’t stand it when the both of you are sent on a mission together

with you he’s fine; but he barely tolerates gojo

ijichi loves you, since you compliment him on the smallest of things, or smile at him warmly whenever he does something right; may have a crush on you that he refuses to reveal to anyone

both of you probably have shopping trips every weekend; don’t tell me you two don’t splurge on clothing when you two can charge whatever it is you want to the gojo clan account

you two probably got a lot of those roadside modelling offers - and sometimes you’d probably even joke about leaving the whole jujutsu world behind to become a model instead

“i mean - it pays. and all i need to do is sit and look pretty.”

a lot of ‘did not!’ and ‘did too!’ arguments all day long

you two love to taunt the Curses together before you kill them - it makes them only more scared, but the ‘chase more fun’

“say, toru - it looks so weak for a semi-first, no?”

“must be a new born - how pathetic.”

bags of candies all over the place - somehow he got you addicted to candy as well, so whenever you two travel, you always buy different candies and different treats

when geto betrayed you all in your third year, gojo turned to you as his pillar of familiarity; even more so when he was force to kill his best friend a few years later. the both of you leaned on each other as you start to pick the pieces of yourselves once more

both you and your brother share the same idea of changing the jujutsu world from the inside out, so you two decided to take up teaching together under the command of now principal yaga

poor man is deciding if he now regrets accepting both of your applications

you took in megumi as your own by the way - so megumi respects you a lot since you’re like the mother he never had. but at the same time, he wouldn’t be surprise if he heard that you do something stupid with your twin brother

feel like gojo and you will spend your free time probably trying to unlock more secrets of the Limitless and how to use your Six Eyes better - and Gojo will teach you how to probably use Hallow Purple and how to use Reverse Cursed Techniques with the held of ieiri as well

you took in maki, inumaki and even panda as your own kids as well - teaching them whenever gojo is forced to go and solve some issue the higher ups throw at him; making the kids super protective of you

even when yuta came, you didn’t care about the special grade curse that was stuck inside of him; treating him like an actual person and training him up and build his confidence once more

when you heard what happened to the special-grade cursed object that megumi was tasked on taking the following year, you laughed your ass off for 10 minutes while megumi tried not to show his annoyance

“y/n-sensei, i almost died. it is not funny.”

but you still took yuji in as your own child, and when you were giving him a tour around campus, you raised an eyebrow when a pair of lips appeared on the side of his cheek

“even though i want to kill that white haired bastard, i might spare your pretty little face.”

“hello to you too, sukuna.” you greeted with a smile while yuji slapped a hand over the mouth, apologising to you with a wild blush on his face. you just laughed and reassured the poor boy it was alright

when nobara came, you adopted her as well; and she loves you, and loves how in tune with the trends you are. you two even have a girl’s night where you talk about everything that happens and have a few rants about boys

all in all - highkey chaotic, but with more common sense then your younger twin brother gojo and knows how to act professional whenever you need to. you also tend to adopt all the students that walks through your doors, and they view you as a parental figure as well. you and your brother are a menace together, but you two get things done and no one can really complain

gojo is protective, but when it comes to you it’s worse lol. but you’re just as bad when it comes to making sure ‘your baby brother’ is safe. you two tend to be super sassy and throw shade at each other, but when it comes down to the basics, you two love each other a lot and will go the extra mile to make sure that each other are safe

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rainy-day-coffee · 3 years

Note

Helloooo. First of all, I definitely LOVE your writing! Theyre so fun to read! And second, can I request hcs...or scenario (you can choose!) with octa trio + riddle and idia accidentally hearing their fem crush gushed enthusiastically about them to her friends? Thanks a lot!

AH- Thank you so much!! (^///^) I have a lot fun writing these for everyone, I’m super happy you like my posts!

Oh anon, this idea!!! I had so much fun with this!! I hope you like it! I genuinely want to make these all into full-fledged scenarios or maybe just mini-scenarios! If you would like one of those, you are more than welcome to ask for it! I’m going to have brainrot about this idea for a long time now, it’s just so cute!

Finding their fem!crush gushing about them to her friends!

Azul had just been minding his business, making his way through the campus of NCR, students avoiding him as usual.

Walking around the corner, he hears you squealing to your group of friends. You sound so excited! It piqued his curiosity so he hid. Just what opportunity could you be presenting him with?

Very jealous at first, he doesn’t know who you’re talking so highly about. He never had much of a fair chance at a relationship with you, or so he believes. He supposes this conversation can be used as black-mail in the future.

And then he hears his name being followed along by another string of compliments.

Almost lets out the loudest gasp, but stops himself in time. He blushes a very deep shade of red. This isn’t fair. You shouldn’t be allowed to make his heart beat this quickly. And all those words of adoration, goodness! What is he supposed to do?

He’s thankful that he sent the twins off to go do something. Otherwise, they would tease him and push him towards you with no remorse.

He proceeds to go straight to his room, launch himself into bed, hug a pillow, and roll around and squeal in joy.

He can use this to his advantage! Your little indirect confession will be used as coverage for when he ropes you into a contract! A contract of love that is!

Jade and Floyd can’t help but notice their boss is in a much happier mood the following days!

He already knew you harbored feelings for him. Remember, he’s amazing at reading people. Now, he was simply waiting for you to make your move.

He really hadn’t expected to find you and your friends in an empty hallway. You were practically vibrating in place while you told them about a certain crush of yours.

How bold of you to talk about such things in public! You can never know who will be listening.

His outside expression doesn’t change. He’s still smiling like usual. On the inside however, he’s quite happy. Technically, this doesn’t count as an advance on your part, but he can use this situation to his benefit.

He makes his way forward ever so quietly. Wrapped up in your excitement, you don’t even seem to notice him.

Your friends desperately try to tell you about the looming eel that is right behind you, please quiet down before you embarrass yourself further.

It seems to be too late for that though.

You feel a pair of hands on your shoulders, finally alerting you of his presence. It’s no use trying to play off the situation, he heard just enough to know.

No please, go on, he insists. Just what else do you have to say? He wants to hear all of it.

Floyd never made his feelings a secret! This applies to his crush on you too! He’s a lot clingier with you, and he tends to drag you around more than anyone else! It’s quite obvious that you’re his obsession. However, you had yet to confess your love for him. What a shy shrimp you are! He’s starting to get a little impatient.

He wasn’t in the best of moods when he overheard your “confession.” He didn’t feel like working at Mostro Lounge or doing that really long assignment Professor Trein had given out. He was so bored.

His mood does a complete 180 when he hears you absolutely “melting” over a “tall and attractive eel who loves to squeeze you.”

He’s so happy to hear that! He knew you loved him too! He quickly becomes annoyed soon after though. Shouldn’t you be telling him these things to his face? It’s quite rude to not be honest with a person.

Goes up and just glomps you right there and then, it doesn’t matter who you’re with or where you are. It’s time to spend the rest of your day with him now! Go on! Tell him about how much you adore him! You have a lot of nerve making him wait!

He’s going to squeeze you all day! This is your punishment for not confessing sooner! It’s impossible to escape now, when Floyd makes up his mind nothing can stop him.

Trey had told Riddle to take a short break from his paperwork. Not wanting to go far from the dorm, he decided to take a stroll through the maze. It was meant to be a relaxing 10-minute walk, not a stressful be quick and hide situation. He did it on impulse! He really didn’t know you were going to be here talking your heart out.

He knows it’s extremely rude to listen in on a private conversation, but he can’t seem to stop. What kind of person have you fallen in love with while he yearns for you?

He almost starts to cry when he realizes it’s him. You sound so genuine and happy when you talk about him! Even if he isn’t your boyfriend just yet, he feels so loved!

Always having been self-conscious for his lack of romantic knowledge, he’s glad you seem to like him anyways! He’s been trying to show off a bit with his magic and intellect lately, it’s paying off it seems!

Feels very guilty nonetheless, he had no right to hear any of this. When he confesses one day, he’ll do his best to apologize.

Riddle tries to calm his racing heart and stop the intense blush on his face before he leaves. He’s quite grateful Trey forced him out here.

He was watching you through the cams he has set up around school. He wasn’t trying to spy on you or anything! He simply happened to be on the right camera at the right time.

He assumes the worst automatically. His self-loathing increases with every compliment you seem to give this mystery person. It clouds his logical thinking. Of course you would love someone else. He just spends his days wasting your time and doing nothing but hanging out in his room. He’s terrible with socializing too. You deserve a lot better.

The bigger part of him wants to shut-off his monitor, not wanting to listen anymore. The smaller part wants to know who’s the object of your affection. Who matches the description of “beautiful, long blue hair,” “pretty yellow eyes,” “adorable fanboy,” and “extremely smart.” It genuinely takes him a good minute or so to figure it out. It helps that you practically shout out his name too.

His entire being turns red, hair included. A room temperature increase follows suit.

His heart can’t handle this! You’re the heroine to this story! You’re supposed to get with one of the cool SSR characters?! The NPC character isn’t a part of the romance list!

Nearly collapses onto the floor in complete happiness and confusion. He’s not complaining, not at all! However, he does begin to question your taste in men.

Ortho is now rushing to his brother’s room. The levels of heat are getting dangerously high and he is panicking. He knows his brother can get random bursts of excitement, but never to this extent!

#twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #twst #twst headcanons #azul ashengrotto #azul ashengrotto x reader #jade leech #jade leech x reader #floyd leech #floyd leech x reader #riddle rosehearts #riddle rosehearts x reader #idia shroud #idia shroud x reader

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ladydimitrescuspet · 3 years

Text

A Living Hell

ao3 link! a little bit of angst for you beautiful souls! I must admit that I hurt my feelings writing this so I ask that you send alcina some love and all the positivity that you can! as always sorry for any grammatical errors, please enjoy, and let me know your thoughts if you want to share them!

warning: no happy ending, sorry!

Tag List (only fill out the form once please): @lord-dimitrescu, @alwaysgoodnight, @paint-it-periwinkle, @lightspica, @ultimatebottom69, @sexyheisenbeast, @crazy-obsessed, @squid3, @inlovewithalcinadimitrescu, @the-obscurity, @sapphicalciee, @ladydimitresculove, @solemnnova, @itsyourgirlmalise, @the-little-shadow, @marvelwomen-simp, @rachelthefanfictionwriter, @d14n4ol, @peachesandlesbians, @celina1221, ｜Anna, @Gansito83, @Followingmyheartledmetoyou, @theuslesslezbian (won’t tag, idk why)

-----

“Mother, I think Y/N’s broken. They’re afraid of me, they’ve never been afraid of me.” Daniela said to her mother.

Alcina motioned for her daughter to come over to her, patting her lap. When Daniela was on her lap, her head rested against her mother. “Y/N’s...” Alcina trailed off, gathering her words together properly. “I know Y/N acts a little different around us nowadays, but.... because of that wretched man-thing and what he did, their memories of us have disappeared, for lack of a better word.” Alcina explained.

“Disappeared? Will they come back?” Daniela asked with a small frown.

Alcina pressed a kiss to Daniela’s forehead. “It’s complicated, darling. With Y/N’s amnesia, there’s no telling if they’ll retain their memories ever again. Donna’s doing all she can to monitor their progress.”

“But?” Daniela questioned.

Alcina sighed. “But it’s not looking hopeful.” Alcina replied. Daniela sniffled, her eyes watering. “Nonetheless, my sweet girl, we’ll do all we can to create new memories with them. We must, however, gain their trust again. Where are your sisters?”

“In Y/N’s room.” Daniela replied quietly.

“That’s no good. If Y/N’s scared of you then there’s no doubt that they’re scared of them as well. Up now, Dani.” Alcina said.

Daniela pouted. “Carry me, momma?” Daniela asked, giving her mother her best puppy dog eyes.

Alcina sighed again, a small smile forming on her face. “Fine, fine. Come now, let us go tend to our guest.” Alcina said as she stood from her chair, her daughter in her arms.

As they walked the halls toward your room, Daniela asked her mother some questions. “What if Y/N doesn’t want to create new memories with us? What if they never love us the same way they used to?”

“It will take time, Daniela, but we will do what we can. Unfortunately, we cannot force them to want more with us just because of how things used to be. They have to want those things on their own, do you understand?” Daniela nodded her head. “Good, good. Down you go, dear.” Alcina said as she placed Daniela on the floor before knocking on the door in front of them.

Cassandra opened the door. “Hello, Mother.” Cassandra said. “Y/N’s locked themselves in the bathroom and they won’t come out. They keep screaming that we’re murderers and they want to go home.” Tears welled in Cassandra’s eyes.

“Oh, my darling, I’m sorry. I’ll explain once I calm them down.” Alcina replied, her hand coming up to run her hand over Cassandra’s hair before cupping her cheek. “Like I told Daniela, it’ll take some time, but we will help them readjust to life in the castle.”

Cassandra nodded her head. “Of course, Mother.”

“Mother, has Cassandra told you about Y/N? They’ve been acting very strange since they woke up.” Bela said as she entered the room, a plate in her hand. “I thought it would be nice for them to eat.”

Alcina smiled at her daughter. “That’s very kind of you, Bela. Leave the plate on the vanity, I’ll make sure they eat.” Alcina said. “Why don’t you girls go entertain yourselves before washing up for dinner while I talk to them.” The girls nodded their heads before exiting the room.

Alcina knocked on the bathroom door. “Go away. Leave me alone.” You responded, the door muffling your voice.

“Darling, I’m afraid I can’t do that.” Alcina replied. “Why don’t you come out here and have something to eat? I sent my daughters away, but Bela brought you some food.”

“I’m not hungry. Can you please just leave me alone?” You asked.

Alcina sighed. “I’m afraid I can do that, dragoste.” Alcina let out a small grunt as she positioned herself to sit up against the wall by the bathroom door. “How about this? If you talk to me about what’s wrong, I’ll give you your space, okay?” Alcina suggested.

You mulled the offer over for a moment before ultimately agreeing to it. You slowly opened the door, a bit shocked to see the Lady on the floor. You sat across from her, your back against the bed. You put as much distance between the two of you as you could.

You bit your lip and sighed. “I don’t want to be here. I want to go home.” You said.

“But darling, you are home. Castle Dimitrescu is your home. Has been for a few decades.” Alcina replied.

You shook your head. “No. No. This is not my home. My house is in the village with my family. I don’t belong here. I don’t want to belong here.” You looked up at her with tears in your eyes. “I just want to go home. Please let me go home.”

You could see the pain in Alcina’s eyes as you pleaded with her. “I’m afraid with the most recent events that have happened, your home is no longer intact. And darling, your family…” Alcina trailed off.

You shook your head. “No, you’re lying. Stop lying to me. Take me home. Now.” You demanding as you stood up and walked over to her. “Take. Me. Home.”

Alcina sighed before rising to her full height. “As you wish, draga mea.” Alcina replied. “But you will not be permitted to stay on the premises, it isn’t safe to do so as it once was.” You frowned at her words, but you knew she was probably right.

It wasn’t until the next that you and the Lady of the Castle travelled down to the village. The shops were all boarded up, the homes were more rundown than the last time you’d been down there. Despite that, you could see the villagers working on their homes to fix them from the event that happened that the Lady had mentioned.

“What… what happened?” You asked as the two of you walked down the road. You thought you might have needed to give her directions, but she seemed to know where she was going. She looked down at you with a raised eyebrow, confusing etching her facial features a bit. “You mentioned some kind of event or events that happened.”

“Ah.” Alcina grimaced slightly as she thought about. “I guess you could call it an invasion. A one man invasion.” Alcina replied. She cleared her throat before continuing. “You see, Mother Miranda is… in need of something. She, well, she found the perfect thing to help her out so she took it. And we, unfortunately, suffered the consequences of her actions. You were injured during the events protecting ou- my daughters from him. He attacked you from behind with some object, hitting your head thus causing you to fall unconscious. A very heartbreaking moment, dear. And then you were in a coma and my dearest sister, Donna, has taken to monitoring your progress during your amnesia.” Alcina explained.

You frowned. “Amnesia?” Alcina hummed. You shook your head. “No. I can’t, that can’t be. I don’t… I don’t remember ever being at the Castle. Ever.” You stared ahead as you came up to the ruins of what used to be your home.

“And what do you remember?” Alcina asked, putting her hand on your shoulder.

You flinched, moving away from her. “Don’t touch me.” You snapped. “As for your question, I remember saying good night to my family and then going to sleep. Then when I woke up, I was at the Castle, in your…” You trailed off as you tried putting the pieces together. “Your eyes widened in horror. “You. You did this. You caused this.”

“Darling, wha-“

You cut her off. “Don’t act innocent. You killed my family, destroyed my home, and kidnapped me. Making up some story about some man invading the village as the perfect cover.” You glared at her. “Did you think I wouldn’t figure it out? That I would just believe your lies?” You could see the pain and hurt in Alcina’s eyes. You moved away from her when she reached her hand out to you again. “I said don’t fucking touch me!” You hissed.

“I’m sorry.” Alcina said softly. “But I didn’t do this. You… you came to the Castle to work. To provide for your family.” Alcina let a small smile grace her face as her eyes teared up a bit. “You were quite clumsy when you started out. The girls didn’t think we should keep you on after your first week, but I… I saw something in you. I made you my personal hand servant after that week. You were terrified. I remember how scared you looked when you found yourself in a room with me, alone. I can’t count how many times I had to reassure you that you were safe with me, for weeks on end. It did take a while for you to warm up to me, but after that you were very confident in your role. We got close, you got close to the girls too. Then one thing led to another. We married. And then that man-thing destroyed the peaceful and loving family I had by taking you away from us.” Alcina sniffled, a few tears falling down her cheeks.

A part of you believed her story, feeling a little tingle within yourself as she told it. But you knew it wasn’t true. “You’re very good.” You replied. Alcina stared at you, purely confused by your words. “At lying. At weaving words together to make them sound believable. You almost had me, almost made me believe that that’s what really happened.” Alcina opened her mouth to say something, but you shook your head. “Don’t bother. You want to know something?”

“Know what?” Her tone sounded a bit lost, you could tell she was beyond hurt by your words.

“That you’re a monster.” You replied. That broke her heart, you could tell the moment you said it, watching her expression crack when you called her a monster. “You take young girls from their homes, kill the men and eat them if they even breathe in your direction. Murdering those girls to use their blood for your so called wine. And call it a form of living, a way for you to survive. You’re a murderer. You’re a monster. But you see yourself as a God, like what you’re doing is okay. It’s not, it’s disgusting. You disgust me. Your daughters disgust me.”

“Y/N, please. You don’t… you don’t mean that. You don’t mean it.” Alcina pleaded slightly as she tried to reach out to you again.

You pushed her hand away, forcefully. “I said don’t fucking touch me. Do not fucking touch me.” You were breathing heavily. You shook your head. “I have to leave. I need to get out of here. You’re monsters, all of you. Every single last one you.” You started walking backwards, away from Alcina. Away from the village. “I'd say I hope you all rot in hell, especially you, but you're already living in it.” You said, spitting at the ground before turning around.

Alcina fiddled with your engagement ring and wedding ring as she watched you walk away from her, tears flowing down her face. She was going to give them back to you when the two of you got back from the village. After she told you what happened. She hadn’t expected you to react that way, didn’t consider this scenario.

Alcina didn’t come after you, she knew she’d already lost you. Twice now. No sense in trying to force you into something you didn’t want. Maybe you always felt this way and the attack was your guiding light, the one you needed to clear your mind and realise just how horrible of a person she was. The girls crowded their Mother as she came home, questioning your whereabouts when they didn't see you.

“Y/N will no longer be residing with us, girls.” Alcina replied. “You may send some maids to clean up the guest room and then you may go play. But I ask that you refrain from ever mentioning Y/N, wipe the Castle of their presence. Get rid of it all.” Alcina requested. “They are as dead to us as we are to them and it will stay that way forever.”

“But Mother…” Daniela started, but quickly found herself closing her mouth at her Mother’s intense stare. “Yes, Mother.” Daniela said dejectedly. Her sisters following her lead before dispersing into their swarms.

Alcina sighed as she made her way to her chambers, placing your rings in the box she’d gotten them in. “Good bye, iubirea mea.” Alcina said softly as she closed the box and placed it on her vanity. The only things she wished to remember you by, allowing only a small part of you to reside in her home and her heart.

#lady dimitrescu #alcina dimitrescu #lady dimitrescu x reader #resident evil #resident evil village #resident evil 8 #lady dimitrescu's daughters #bela dimitrescu #cassandra dimitrescu #daniela dimitrescu #and #donna beneviento #who is only mentioned

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makeste · 3 years

Text

but I just feel too tired to be fighting

this is a follow-up post to what I said in my recap the other day about this arc being the Deku Angst arc, as opposed to the Villain Hunt arc or the Deku SIXQUIRKS Exhibition arc. I feel like the fandom discussion tends to focus on the flashier parts of the chapters -- the sexy villains and the new quirk reveals and the Shindous -- each week, and so the quieter emotional beats sometimes get overlooked, especially since the character arc here is playing out in little bits and pieces over time rather than all at once.

this has always been a very reactionary fandom, and there’s a tendency to judge the chapters week to week without ever going back to look at how they all fit into the big picture. so I figured I would try to attempt that, and basically go chapter by chapter here to look at what exactly Horikoshi is setting up and how it all fits together.

so let’s start with the end of chapter 306, which is when the arc officially kicks off. specifically with the very last page:

this is imo one of the best pages Horikoshi has ever drawn. I got the sense that this was a scene he’d had in his mind’s eye for quite a long time, and that he was excited to finally get to this part of the story. it’s extremely effective as both a chapter-ender, and an arc-opener. like, look at this:

it establishes the initial premise of the new arc -- the world is in chaos, and Deku is now seemingly on his own

it leaves the readers with a number of questions. why did Deku leave U.A.?? is he really on his own now?? why does he look so beat-up and exhausted?? what is he up to?? what is the world like now that all these villains have been unleashed and the heroes have been decimated?? and most importantly of all, what the fuck is going to happen next??

it pays homage to some of Horikoshi’s comic book influences -- Batman in particular

it dramatically hits us with that “THE FINAL ACT BEGINS” and lets us know that shit is getting real now

that’s some good shit. so much so that I think people tended to overlook the other notable thing about this page amidst all of the initial excitement and discussion and speculation about where the series was headed. and that is the fact that the final panel in this chapter is NOT the panel of Deku standing above the city. the very last panel, the one that this chapter actually ends on, is instead the close-up of Deku’s face. his face, which is covered in shadow; and his eyes, which have dark circles under them and are prominently missing the usual flecks of light that give him his signature “sunny optimistic shounen protagonist” look.

not to mention this last line here, which is a call back to the very first time we saw the 14-year-old Deku way back in chapter one.

I don’t think it’s a coincidence that Horikoshi chose to throw this reference in. nor is it a coincidence that THIS is the scene he actually chose to end the chapter on. what this does is show us the drastic shift in Deku’s emotional state of mind, and his attitude towards being a hero. he’s gone from being thrilled and excited to being jaded and exhausted. he’s matured, but at a great cost. it’s always been his dream to be a hero, but “be careful what you wish for” is a popular adage for a reason. and right now he looks the furthest thing from happy.

and this is the emotional beat that Horikoshi chooses to end the chapter on. this is the panel that closes out the War arc, and begins the final act. to me the message could not be clearer -- this arc will be about the exploration of Deku’s character, and his struggle as he tries to live up to the expectations that have been placed on him as the Last Holder of OFA and quite possibly the World’s Only Hope.

it’s a character arc that builds on a lot of the things we’ve already learned about Deku over the course of the series, such as the fact that he is reckless, and that he focuses on others often at the expense of himself. but more importantly, it’s an arc that finally expands on the dark side of what has up until now been a net positive for Deku -- the power of OFA. up until this point, despite its ups and downs, it’s been a boon for Deku overall and has allowed him to pursue his dream. but now we’re finally reaching the point where the monkey’s paw part of the OFA blessing/curse finally starts to come into play. OFA gives Deku more power than he could have ever dreamed of, but it also comes with a built-in destiny that he can’t opt out of whether he likes it or not. AFO is on the loose and out there trying to destroy the world. and now everyone has pinned their hopes on this sixteen-year-old kid, and the question of whether or not the sixteen-year-old kid is ready is apparently not one that anyone feels inclined to ask (possibly because they’re afraid that the answer might be “no”).

he doesn’t have a choice in the matter. he has to do it, because there’s no one else who can. that’s the kind of pressure that is on Deku now.

and on that note, we begin the Deku Angst arc.

chapter 307

this in hindsight was mostly just a set-up chapter to better establish the current state of the BnHA world at large (spoilers: it’s not good), while also providing an answer for one of the big initial questions of the arc -- namely, “what happened to all of those villains that AFO released from Tartarus?” these are important things to touch on, but the pacing could definitely have been better, and the bulk of the chapter was dedicated to providing fanservice to all of the Shindou fans who spammed the most recent popularity poll (which, whatever lol). anyway, so this was the sole chapter thus far with absolutely no Deku development. thankfully the arc picks up from there.

chapter 308

on to the next one! this was the one and only chapter thus far which I think actually qualifies as an “exhibition fight.” this was definitely all about showing off Deku’s current powerset, as well as introducing us to another of the SIXQUIRKS. however, there was Deku development here as well, most notably in this scene:

this is the scene that got a lot of people speculating that this arc was going to focus on Deku hunting down all of the old villains. but I think people got so caught up in that speculation that they overlooked what this scene tells us about Deku’s mindset. and yes, there is new information being revealed here, and it’s not just a rehash of the stuff we already knew. like yes, we know that Deku was shaken up by the recent encounters with Dabi and Tomura, and we know that made him start questioning why villains become villains in the first place, and all that good stuff, and that’s great. however, there are two additional important things that this scene helps establish for us.

the upcoming battle with TomurAFO is weighing heavily on Deku’s mind. this is something that will become a recurring theme in this arc. Deku is thinking about this constantly. the question of what to do when he finally encounters TomurAFO again is knocking incessantly at the back of his mind, and this won’t be the last time it comes up.

Deku is using these villain encounters as test runs. can Tomura be redeemed?? is he just being stupid and naïve?? or is this really something worth attempting?? the interesting thing about this is that Deku’s resolve to save people is usually so strong and unwavering that it’s more than enough to overcome any doubts that he might have. but this time it seems like the repeated objections posed by the Vestiges and Gran Torino have really gotten to him. it’s possible I’m just reading way too much into things, but to me it really feels like Deku’s recent attempts at Talk no Jutsu were meant to do more than just show his growing awareness that the line between heroes and villains is thinner than he once imagined. they’re also serving as trial runs for the real test, when it finally comes. if he can “save” even a villain like Muscular, there’s hope for him being able to save Tomura as well. and so that moment when Muscular rejects him out of hand is all the more disappointing to him, even if it wasn’t really unexpected. basically it wasn’t the answer that he had been hoping for.

aside from those little notes though, like I said, this was unquestionably an exhibition fight first and foremost. which is fine; we needed to establish where Deku is currently in terms of strength, and it was also just fun to see him kick some ass, ngl. in terms of story purpose this chapter was similar to 219, which showed us how Shouto and Katsuki had powered up after getting their provisional licenses. people who don’t care about those characters might argue that these fights weren’t necessary, but as someone who stans all three characters hard, I would disagree! but anyways, moving on.

chapter 309

in contrast to the previous chapter, this chapter focuses more on establishing Deku’s current mental state, as opposed to his physical state. and this is what we learn:

(1) Deku is ~technically~ being shadowed/accompanied by All Might and the Hawksquad (but in practice he’s avoiding them).

(2) it was Deku’s own decision to leave U.A., and he did it because he didn’t want anyone else getting hurt in order to protect him.

and finally, (3) Deku’s game plan is to stop Tomura and All for One before they reach full power.

this last part is very important, because it means there’s a countdown in effect. as far as Deku is concerned, there’s only a finite amount of time before TomurAFO becomes unstoppable. which means that he’s not only under “gotta get stronger” pressure, but time pressure as well. he doesn’t have the luxury of taking his time and training in safety. he’s being rushed now; this is do-or-die.

this chapter is also the first in this arc in which we get to see Deku’s expressions without the hood covering up his face, and what we see is very telling. as previously stated, the light is gone from Deku’s eyes. he keeps his expressions very neutral, and the only time we even see a hint of a smile is when he hugs his mom in the flashback, and it’s clear from the dialogue (“it’s okay, I’ll come home to you”) that he’s doing it for her sake in order to comfort her.

but aside from that, this is very much not the Deku we’ve grown accustomed to. this is the chapter that really establishes his current mental state imo. above all else, he’s afraid that more people will get hurt because of him, and so he’s distancing himself from everyone around him. and he’s also morbidly preoccupied with the inevitability of having to face TomurAFO again, and soon. the chapter ends on the flashback of Gran giving him his cape, and telling Deku that “killing can be another way to save someone.” there’s a lot on this kid’s mind, to say the least.

chapter 310

this chapter opens with a gang of civilians who are trying to open fire on a nice fox lady whose only crime was walking around in the rain at night. Deku intervenes to save her, and it’s the first time in this arc that we see anything close to the “old” Deku, who just wanted to save people with a smile.

but it’s bittersweet, because all the lady can talk about is how scared she was, and how horrible everything is right now. and so Deku, who feels responsible in a lot of ways for everything that’s happened, just feels that much more pressure to somehow make things right again.

there’s also this extra throwaway line which is especially heartbreaking:

“I can’t afford to be around anyone.” fucking ouch. just reinforcing once more how incredibly isolated Deku is right now -- not by choice, but because he feels like it’s not safe to let anyone else get close to him. and so he’s out here running around this dystopian cityscape in the middle of the night in the pouring rain all on his own, and neglecting himself to the point where All Might practically has to force a bento on him.

but does he complain? of course not. because his focus is never on himself. instead, when he settles down to eat, his thoughts immediately drift back to, guess who...

it’s that time pressure once again. “unless I draw out One for All’s full power, I can’t stop any of this.” it’s just nonstop, I have to get stronger, I’m running out of time, I have to do better, and constantly thinking about that inevitable confrontation.

Deku is a thinker, you guys. and when left to his own devices he will overthink, every time. his mind will run in endless loops while he mentally works his way through all of the possibilities. and that’s one of his greatest strengths, don’t get me wrong, but at a time like this it’s also one of his greatest weaknesses. it’s just so fucking easy for him to get stuck in his own head, in his endless rambling thoughts and analyses. and without anyone else there to help distract him, or help him focus, he’s become fixated on his mission, and it’s slowly consuming him.

this, incidentally, is also the chapter in which we finally see Two and Three’s faces, and learn why Two in particular is so reluctant to lend his power to Deku. he appears to be the lone holdout at this point, so stay tuned on that, because I don’t doubt this will wind up being crucial to Deku’s future development, however it winds up playing out.

chapter 311

this chapter flips back to the Hawksquad for the first half, so we get a brief respite from the ongoing Dekuangst. right before we switch back though, we do get confirmation of something we had pretty much already guessed:

like, that much was already apparent based on what we’d seen (the bags under his eyes; the fact that he refused to sit still in any one place for very long even at night), but it’s always nice to get the official confirmation so that people can’t dispute it lol. so yeah, Deku isn’t sleeping much. and not eating much either, if all he’s getting is the occasional bento from Dadmight. so basically not taking care of himself at all, huge shocker there. but this is something that’s important enough to the story that Horikoshi took the time to point it out in the dialogue, in addition to all of the visual clues we’d already gotten.

and just in case we needed to drive that point in any further, this chapter ends with the appearance of Lady Nagant! like yeah, no shit Deku isn’t getting much sleep, what with him having to fend off racist civilians and hired assassins every five fucking minutes. smdh. can he live??

chapter 312

so this is the chapter that properly introduces Lady Nagant, who maaaay or may not be one of the primary antagonists of this arc?? like, it’s really unclear right now tbh, but she gets hyped up by Hawks and AFO, and has a flashback and a mysterious past and a weird trump card (where did you go, Overhaul) and all that good shit, so yeah? one can hope at any rate.

but anyway. so to his credit, Deku’s first thought is to retreat, but he quickly abandons that plan once he figures out Nagant’s location. this is played off like a logical strategic decision at first, but the subsequent chapter quickly makes it clear that Deku’s decision to take the fight to Nagant is less rational than he might have you think.

chapter 313

so yeah. last but not least, the most recent chapter, in which Deku’s real reason for targeting Lady soon becomes apparent:

what’s more, it quickly becomes clear that he miscalculated and probably would have been better off following Hawks’s advice, seeing as he promptly gets himself shot, and subsequently realizes that AFO gave Nagant an extra quirk, something he hadn’t taken into account. but instead of cutting his losses and running at this point, he doubles down instead and not only breaks out Smokescreen, but also the Third’s quirk which he has never even used before.

it’s worth noting that both En and the Third start telling him to chill at this point, and warn him that what he’s attempting is too dangerous. but tbh if they were expecting him to listen, they haven’t been reading the same arc I’ve been reading. once again, Horikoshi makes it clear that Deku has one thing and one thing only on his mind right now.

of course. once again it all comes back to this. hunt down AFO. it doesn’t matter that he’s exhausted. it doesn’t matter that he’s just been shot twice. it doesn’t matter that Hawks, despite knowing what Deku was capable of with his OFA abilities, specifically warned him away from this one person only. it doesn’t matter that even the Vestiges are trying to tell him you’re going too fast and you’re trying to do too much and it’s too dangerous.

he just doesn’t care. long story short, the only thing that matters to Deku right now is tracking down and defeating TomurAFO. and as the person who knows him best once so aptly put it, “he doesn’t take himself into account.” and therein lies the major challenge of this arc.

and so this is where we’re currently at now. and this has been a very long post, but if nothing else, I hope I was able to get this one point across: there is absolutely no way that Deku will be able to defeat TomurAFO as he is now. not a chance in hell. somehow he’s managed the uncommon feat of waging a war of attrition against himself, which is really quite an accomplishment. he’s not taking care of himself, and he’s refusing to listen to sound advice from the people surrounding him, and is trying to skip ahead to the final boss battle before he’s ready, because the guilt and pressure from feeling responsible for the current situation are eating him up. the only way that the world can go back to normal is if he can defeat AFO; therefore he has to do it as soon as possible, because time is running out and everyone is counting on him. this is who Deku is. and this is what inevitably happens when his saving mentality is taken to extremes, and left unchecked.

anyway so to wrap up this post now, I do think this arc is a lot more cohesive than it’s gotten credit for thus far, and Deku is the glue holding it all together. I for one am loving the exploration of his character and all the subtle little angsty touches as we build up to the big moment, whenever it finally comes. just keep in mind though that if his decisions right now seem reckless and short-sighted, it’s because they’re supposed to seem that way, because Deku is not in a good mental state right now. the cracks are finally showing in our perfect protagonist, just like everyone has been wanting this whole time. he is just a kid. he is doing his best. he is trying far too hard to do his best, and it is hurting him so badly, but he doesn’t even realize. this arc is not an endorsement of the Angsty Nomad Hero lifestyle, lol. it’s the exact fucking opposite, and I think it’s being wildly misinterpreted with all of the emphasis on “oh look at that, he mastered another quirk with no effort”, as opposed to “oh look at that, he is shutting down emotionally and is a few more missed nights of sleep away from a complete and total breakdown.”

tl;dr the overarching storyline of this arc is all about Deku slowly falling apart due to his trauma from Jakku, and the subsequent pressure that was put on him by the Vestiges with their whole “GUESS WHAT, YOU’RE THE LAST USER OF OFA, THAT’S RIGHT, IT’S ALL ON YOU BUDDY” pep talk. and mark my words, things are not going to go according to plan. something is going to go terribly wrong here. whether it’s something happening to All Might, or AFO setting up a trap for him, either way Deku is being set up to fail in a major way. unless of course, someone (or a group of someones) manages to intervene first, and possibly stage an intervention or something. it’s what he needs right now, but idk if Horikoshi is going to make it that easy.

anyway, but in other words, the point of this arc is not to show how much stronger Deku has gotten and how he doesn’t even need his friends anymore. it’s the exact opposite -- the point of this arc is to show that Deku needs his friends now more than ever. that in spite of OFA and all of its mystical trappings and fancy SIXQUIRKS, Deku can’t do this alone. he needs his friends. that’s the core message. and right now, we are at the “I can get by on my own” part of the story. and the part we are all waiting for, but which is coming -- I guarantee it is coming, you guys -- is “the thing is, you don’t have to.”

and that shit is going to slap hard you guys. and I for one can’t wait. but until then, enjoy the angst.

#bnha 313 #midoriya izuku #bnha meta #deku meta #bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste reads bnha #long post #like 'long' is really an understatement here lol #our little green protagonist is really going through it you guys #and I just have a lot of thoughts and feelings about it

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hpalways · 3 years

Note

Heyy I was wondering if you could write just a few hc or one shots for Albedo, Kazuha, or Venti with an s/o who overworks themself with work and stuff? Yknow- comfort stuff :3 Unfortunately I’ve been having to work over fifty + hours these past few weeks, and I love your writing! Have a nice day btw-!!

Note: hiiiii! yes! of course. this sounds lovely to write about. please take care of yourself omg, that sounds really stressful and tiring. aww! and thank you for enjoying my works, im so happy to hear that ^^

Fandom: Genshin Impact

Characters: Albedo, Kazuha, Venti

Warnings: None

Albedo

When he sees you studying religiously in the workshop, he goes to the nearby campfire. Finding a pot and some water, he warms it up to make hot cocoa. Heading back to you, he hands it to you, watching your face light up in pleasant surprise.

As the workshop in the mountains can still get cold, he fetches a wool blanket to wrap around your arms. It allows you to have a better time with your research.

He tries to take your mind off of work by asking you to be his model for his next art piece. You are told to lay down, because he wants to draw you that way. Despite shooting him a confused look, you follow through with it anyway, getting into a position that’s too relaxing. Soon enough, you fall asleep and he quickly tends to you and tuck you in.

Other times, he wants you away from the workaholic atmosphere. Holding your hand tightly, he leads you out of the cave-like study and into the pretty snow. A light flutter falls from the skies, tickling your cheeks in gentle waves. The two of you stroll through the slippery slopes, and he makes sure no harm comes to you.

He talks philosophically and about the world, giving you a break from the load of paperwork.

However, he is quite the workaholic himself, his thoughts always straying to him own studies. This usually strikes some sense in you, where you help pull him out of his stupor, as well as your own. The two of you continues to remind each other that breaks are needed. He’s your rock to hold onto; and you were his.

“[Y/N]? You appear very tired. Slow down and let me fix you some tea.”

Kazuha

Whispers poetry into your ear. His voice itself is soothing to you, calming your frantic nerves from the ongoing training that was set in stone. Every word that comes out is like silk, which relaxes your tense muscles.

Pulling you away from the training grounds, he shows the nature views he has grown so fond of. Maple leaves rain down in gentle motion, the scenery warming you up inside with comfort. It is beautiful and you do not regret sneaking out with Kazuha for this moment.

He talks about his homeland, Inazuma, full of raw emotion and beautiful phrases that take your breath away. He tells you not to rush what fate has in store for you, to take it easy and go at your own pace. This relieves your stress easily.

You are sometimes taken out to the ship, where you are not allowed to train. The sea laps beneath the engine, blue waves furling in a way that soothed you. It is beautiful, the horizons stretching far and wide, with the rising morning sun in the distance.

Seeing your tired expression, he takes you to the middle of nowhere -- the meadows where it is warm and the sun basks. He says the wind leads him here. And before you know it, the two of you are knocked out on a rock, taking a nap together to find your energy again for the next coming day.

At times, he goes easy on you during battles, soon turning it into a fun word game where he contemplates haiku.

“The wind is calm today. Come. We don’t need you rushing either.”

Venti

Always very willing to distract you from your paperwork. Barging right into your office at the Favonius Headquarters, he walks to you with a giddy smirk.

He takes no objections, deaf to your protests as he forces you out of there, running through the fields with you fumbling behind him. He goes to Windrise, expertly climbing up his favorite tree. You sit beside him, letting out a sigh at the male. You are secretly happy to be here instead.

Plays his precious lyre to you, the melodic song ringing into your ears. They make you feel warm inside... and sleepy. His voice is angelic as always, with favorite lyrics tumbling out of his precious lips.

Of course, he brings you to his favorite tavern in Mondstadt, Angel’s Share. Buying a bunch of drinks, the two of you drink and feel the rush of it kicking in. He is smiling in content when you sag your shoulders into a relaxed state, no more worrying about the irrelevant stuff from before.

Tells you lots of jokes. You try not to laugh at them, but he eventually gets to you anyway. His teal eyes watch you softly, content to destress you from the workload you keep putting on yourself. He misses when you had more freetime -- when you aren’t fretting about the littlest things.

He gives you a lot of surprise hugs. His arms are surprisingly strong, tightening around you and stubborn to let you go. You feel yourself giving in to the sturdiness of his arms.

“Free yourself from the chains of responsibility, [Y/N]. Eheheh. Pretty please?”

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reidandweep · 3 years

Text

Something Bigger Than Us

Spencer Reid x Reader (female)

A/N- Hi guys, I am back after an eventful few months. Had to deal with some personal stuff, but I am back now and writing more! So, to celebrate, heres some fluff with our favourite genius!!

Word Count- 4026 words

Warnings- Fluff, mention of bodily liquids in the case, mentions of murder.

The beauty of love is that, you can fall into it with the most unexpected person at the most unexpected time. - Ritu Ghatourey.

Sitting in the subway cart, Spencer indulged in the book in his hands. It had been a gift from Penelope as she had always told him he had to read more fictional works. So, there Spencer was, on his day off, travelling to the science museum and reading ‘The Maze Runner’. He was taking more time than he needed; slowing down his reading speed to prolong the story to fit his entire journey. He was so engrossed that he nearly didn’t notice the subway cart come to a stop and the doors open, a woman walking inside. What made Spencer glance up from the novel in his hands was the slight change of weight near his feet. Looking away from his novel, he didn’t expect to see said woman sitting on the subway cart floor. Spencer glanced around to see multiple seats available, yet there this person was. Sat on the ground.

“Did you want to sit here?”

Spencer had found many women pretty in his life. He had found a few to be gorgeous. But this woman, she was breath taking. As she lifted her gaze to stare into his, Spencer felt a warmth he never felt. A moment. A spark.

The woman smiled up at Spencer.

“No, it’s okay. I quite like sitting on the floor. I can feel the wheels moving more.”

Spencer looked at the woman puzzled.

She couldn’t help but let her smile grow.

“Sit down and feel.”

Spencer’s brain went blank at the woman’s request. He knew how much bacteria there was on the floor and could not imagine doing such a thing as sitting on it.

“On average, more than 9 million people ride the subway every day. That’s 18 million feet on that floor. They could have stepped in anything. The number of bacteria is unimaginable.”

The woman shrugged.

“So, that’s 18 million feet and my butt. At least I can say I enjoyed my subway ride more because I felt the wheels on the tracks.”

The warmth in Spencer’s chest spread the more he looked at her. Before he even realised, Spencer found himself sliding from his seat and onto the subway floor next to her. She was right. You could feel the wheels thumping against the tracks.

“It’s like a heartbeat.”

The woman looked at the floor of the carriage with a smile.

“People ride the subway every day and never think about how amazing it is that this thing was created. That we can hop on something that could take us wherever we desired to in our city. They treat it like it's nothing. But it moves like we do, and it stops like we do.”

The woman looked up at Spencer.

“It has a heartbeat. Just like you and I.”

In his whole life, Spencer had never heard someone describe anything in such a way that made it feel human; that made him feel so human.

“So, where are we going?”

“We?”

The woman smiled and stood from the ground, holding her hand out for Spencer to take. He did so without a thought. It was like being around her made him forget everything.

“Yes, we? I had no plans but then I met you and it seems you had plans so now I do to. So, where are we going mister…?”

Spencer straightened his satchel, his hands gripping the straps. The warmth that had spread from his chest now burnt in the hand he had held hers with for those few seconds.

“My names Spencer. Spencer Reid. I’m actually a doctor but not a medical one. I have three PHD’s and three bachelor’s Degrees, but none of them are remotely medical. I could go into that field if I wanted to but…”

Spencer stopped himself as he realised, he was rambling.

The woman leaned against the pole to her side and looked at Spencer in earnest.

“You were saying you could go into the medical field if you wanted to but…”

She was actually listening to his rambling and she even seemed to be interested.

Spencer’s hands gripped his satchel tighter.

“But I have enough to focus on with work already.”

The woman nodded her head in understanding.

“Well, Dr Spencer Reid, my name is Y/F/N. Y/F/N Y/L/N. My title is just regular old miss. Unfortunately, I have no PHDs, but I do have a bachelor’s degree in Film Studies which I’m presuming is nowhere near exciting as what you have yours in. I could never have gone into the medical field because I hated biology and preferred chemistry at school as I liked drawing the chemical equations more than learning about photosynthesis. The only part I liked about biology was learning about thalidomide, which is really grim, but it was fascinating.”

Whilst she spoke, Spencer couldn’t help but notice the movement of her hands. Her nails on her right hand were painted a different colour to the ones on her left. Just like how he wore different socks on each foot. He liked that they unknowingly matched.

“Now we are no longer strangers, I think you need to tell me where we are going?”

Spencer looked towards the doors and noticed that they were actually soon to arrive to his stop.

“I was going to visit the museum. The next stop is my one.”

Y/N looked at the door and nodded.

“Cool. So, can I join?”

Even though she had already said she was joining him twice, Spencer did not think she actually meant it. He stuttered through his words as his thoughts blazed around his head.

Y/N could see his mind going into overdrive.

“Hey.”

Spencer looked down at the shorter woman in front of him. He wondered why she seemed so worried.

“I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable. I tend to come off as quite strong but something about you tells me I need to know more. I want to know more. Spend more time with you. I’d love to see the things Dr Spencer Reid, who has three PHDs and was reading one of my favourite books when I hopped on the train, had planned to see today. I will only join you if it is something you want.”

Spencer felt the subway cart come to a stop and saw the doors in his peripheral open.

He was tired of living life through the view of work before anything else. The few moments of happiness he had was taken away by not allowing himself to be spontaneous. To be with them in person. So, for the second time that day, Spencer grabbed a hold of Y/N’s hand, ignoring the facts and statistics of germs and bacteria running through his mind.

Pulling her towards the doors, the pair stepped off the subway cart and onto the platform.

People walked around the pair as they stood facing each other, staring at one another with their hands entwined.

Spencer swallowed the lump in his throat.

“I would like if you would join me to the museum. I would like to spend more time with you too.”

Y/N smiled at Spencer’s words. With the hand still not in his grasp, Y/N lifted her arm towards the subway exist.

“Well, lead the way Dr Spencer Reid.”

Spencer did just that.

In silence the pair walked the short distance from the subway station to the museum. Their hands interlocked at their sides as Y/N looked around at the buildings by them. Spencer couldn’t help but glance towards the woman. He couldn’t understand why he felt so different with her. The warmth in his chest was still there, and it felt as though it was growing and spreading with every breath he took. His hand in her own was something he wished to never lose. It was like being enveloped in the softest blanket known to man. This stranger who sat by his feet on the subway has made him feel more comfortable and step out of his comfort zone more than any of his friends or family ever have. But why?

Coming to the doors of the museum, Spencer opened the door for Y/N to enter before him; letting go of her hand to do so. He felt empty without her hand in his. He couldn’t believe how empty his palm now felt.

“I’ve never been to this museum before.”

Y/N couldn’t help but laugh at the shocked look on Spencer’s face. As though what she said was the most shocking thing he had ever heard.

Before she could even make a joke about his expression, Spencer suddenly turned down a corridor.

“Woah! Slow down Doc!”

Spencer slowed down his pace.

“I’m sorry. It’s just this is my favourite place and I want to show you everything it has to offer.”

Y/N smiled at Spencer’s bashful behaviour. She couldn’t help her own cheeks blushing at the thought that this kind man wanted to show her around his favourite place. To think she had only met him a mere hour before.

Giving Spencer’s a comforting smile, Y/N bumped her shoulder with his own.

“I have a feeling that I am going to learn a lot with you as my tour guide.”

Spencer led the way as they walked through the corridors, reciting information about each exhibit they come across, stuttering when he felt Y/N’s hands brush his own as they walked side by side.

Just as Spencer was about the point Y/N to the next exhibit, he felt her hands slowly clasp around his own. Her smooth fingers fitting perfectly into the gaps between his rough appendages.

“Is this okay?”

Spencer smiled in delight, squeezing her hand in reassurance as he pulled Y/N in the direction they had been heading.

Walking hand in hand down the hall, Spencer silently led Y/N to one of his favourite parts of the museum. As they entered the room, Y/N’s eyes could not miss the large rock exhibited in the middle of the room, people sporadically standing around the object.

“What is that?”

Spencer’s chest became warm at the look of wonder on Y/N’s face as they walked closer to the exhibit.

“That is the Willamette Meteorite. It was found in Oregon and is the largest ever meteorite found in the United States and the sixth largest in the world. The smooth surface melted during its blazing entry into the atmosphere, while the pits formed on the Earth's surface. Iron meteorites form when large enough asteroids have had molten interiors catastrophically collide with other asteroids. These huge collisions blast out material from the molten iron core of the asteroid on orbits that reach Earth after millions of years.”

Y/N continued her wonderous gaze as they let go of Spencer’s hand, walking around the meteorite, taking in every crevice and crater. Spencer could usually spend hours staring at the meteor, but right now he could not tear his haze away from Y/N as she took her time looking at the artefact.

Turning to look at Spencer, Y/N wanted to find out more.

“How was it made? Like is it a piece of something much bigger?”

Spencer looked at the meteorite that stood much taller than all of them.

“The internal structure, made of metallic iron, suggests that billions of years ago, an early planet orbiting the Sun was shattered, perhaps in a collision with another protoplanet. The fragment was probably part of the planet’s iron-nickel core. While planets, including Earth gradually formed and matured, this fragment orbited the Sun. It was hit at least twice by other planetary fragments, knocking it into a collision course with Earth. Over many centuries, rainwater interacting with its iron sulphide deposits produced sulfuric acid, which slowly etched and carved large cavities.”

Spencer waited for a response, but as the seconds passed in silence. Had he freaked her out? Had he gone too far? Spencer moved his gaze from the meteor to Y/N, to see her staring at the meteorite in awe.

“Woah.”

Spencer laughed at her exclamation. His head dipping down to try and cover his reddening cheeks.

“Woah indeed.”

Y/N couldn’t help the blush now invading her cheeks. Walking back towards Spencer, Y/N nudged the genius’s shoulder with her own, gaining his attention. Spencer turned his head to look back at Y/N.

“It’s crazy how we get to look at something that was once part of something much bigger. Something that could have housed life and all sorts of wonderous things and yet, here sits part of its core, on our planet, in one of our museums. Now a part of something much bigger again.”

Spencer and Y/N looked at each other in silence. Taking in the moment and her words. Both of them acknowledging that they too were part of something much bigger, much more meaningful than they had every thought about.

A clicking sound broke the moment.

Turning around, Spencer and Y/N both saw an older gentleman pointing a polaroid camera towards the pair.

Realising that the pair had turned around the gentleman walked up towards them and handed over the picture.

“It still has to develop.”

Y/N looked down at the picture in Spencer’s hand as it slowly developed.

“Can you take another one? Just so we can have one each.”

The man nodded at Y/N question, stepping back to where he stood before.

Y/N moved her hand to clasp Spencer’s once more, tilting her head to lay on his shoulder, a smile blossomed on her face as she looked towards the camera.

Spencer’s own gaze was fixed on her. His eyes taking in the slope of her nose and the feel of her hair tickling his neck. Usually, if he was ever this close to anyone, let alone a woman, he would start to sweat and panic. And yet, all Spencer could feel was what he could only describe as serene. Spencer had never felt serene until now.

Being shaken out of his stare by the click of the man’s camera once more, Spencer looked to see the man handing Y/N the picture as she rummaged through her bag.

“No need to pay me.”

Y/N shook her head.

“I insist.”

The man moved forward, placing his hand on Y/N’s shoulder.

“I gave you the picture because sometimes it is nice to look back where it all began.”

The old man looked Spencer in the eye and gave him a wink, causing Spencer to blush.

“Both of you, enjoy your day, and may I suggest if you get hungry, try Giovani’s Café down the street.”

Spencer cocked his head.

“Is it good?”

The man laughed as he walked backwards, nodded his head.

“I should know, I am Giovanni after all!”

Laughter rumbled from the pair as they watched the older gentlemen walk out the door, his polaroid camera in hand. As their laughter died, Y/N looked down at the now developed picture in her hand. Spencer in turn looked at his own.

The picture was beautiful. With the light from outside cascading through the windows, creating almost a halo of light around the pair, the meteorite had never looked bigger than when Spencer saw the back of his and Y/N’s figures standing in front of it. But what Spencer couldn’t take his eyes away from was the fact that in the picture, Y/N was not looking at the meteorite. She was looking at him. If he looked hard enough, he could see a smile on her face. So soft and so beautiful.

The comforting silence of the pair looking at their polaroids was suddenly shattered when Spencer’s ringtone filled the air. Spencer couldn’t help but let his shoulders drop in disappointment.

“I’m so sorry, I just have to take this.”

Y/N smiled in acknowledgment,

“Go ahead, I’m just going to take a look over here.”

Spencer nodded as he watched her walk across the hall, examining the pictures and their information plaques as he answered his phone.

“Hello.”

“We got a case Pretty Boy. Wheels up in 50 minutes.”

Spencer rubbed his head at Morgan’s voice.

“Okay.”

Morgan could hear the disappointment in Spencer’s tone.

“Are we interrupting something?”

Spencer kept his eyes on Y/N as he took a second to answer.

“Yeah. But I’ll be there in 30 minutes.”

Morgan chuckled.

“Okay, Genius, see you later.”

Spencer hung up his phone. Walking towards where Y/N still stood, he tapped the woman on her shoulder.

As she turned, Y/N took in Spencer’s solemn look.

“Is everything okay?”

Spencer shook his head.

“Work called. I have to leave. I’m sorry.”

Y/N smiled in understanding.

“Work is work, whatever it may be. No need to be sorry. I had an amazing day that I didn’t think I would have.”

Spencer stared Y/N in her eyes, a little smile adorning his face.

“I did too. I have to go. But can we meet again?”

Y/N nodded her head, her own smile lighting her face.

“Yeah. I would like that.

Spencer grinned as he began to turn around, walking towards the corridors exit, waving as he left. He began to walk down the stairs when he suddenly heard his name.

“Spencer, wait!”

Spencer turned around to see Y/N running down the stairs towards him, polaroid in hand.

Stopping in front of him, as Y/N stood on the steps above Spencer, she was nearly as tall as the boy wonder.

“You dropped this.”

“Thank you.”

As Spencer went to reach for the picture, Y/N pulled it out of his reach.

He watched with bated breath as she carefully put the picture in the breast pocket of his jacket, tapping his jacket where the picture now safely sat.

“Now go before your boss gets angry at you for being late.”

Laughing at her truthful words, Spencer once again waved towards the girl, rushing down the steps as he looked at his watch, realising that he was going to be late. But even with that knowledge, as he opened the exit door of the museum, Spencer turned to wave goodbye to Y/N once more. Watching as she waved back, before he allowed the door to close behind him.

Spencer walked to the jet as briskly as he could, breathing heavily from the sprint through the airport, just about getting through easily with his badge.

Trotting up the steps, Spencer leaped into the jet, quickly taking the seat next to Emily, his breath heavy as he took in deep breaths.

The team ceased their conversation, all looking at Spencer in confusion and worry.

“Sorry I’m late, what’s the case?”

Spencer ignored the strange looks and elongated silence.

Hotch quickly broke it.

“We’re heading to Akron, Ohio. We got two murdered couples with the men both being found with used condoms on and Viagra in their systems. In both cases, the husbands were killed with a silenced 9-millimeter, the wife was stabbed multiple times. We’re meeting up with the Akron P.D when we get there. Everything you need is in the file.”

Spencer nodded his head as he grabbed the file from Hotch, opening the papers as the plane took off.

Briskly looking through the file, Spencer began to detail notes in his notebook about possible suspects and details the others may have missed. But as he scribbled, Spencer could feel the stares of Emily, Morgan, and JJ as they all sat by him. Fed up, Spencer lifted his head, flittering his gaze between them all.

“Can I help?”

“Why was you late?”

Spencer looked at Morgan.

“I was at the museum.”

“That’s the truth but why was you late?”

Spencer turned his eyes to Emily, confusion littering his features.

“I was at the museum, I had to get on the subway and get here.”

JJ tilted her head as Spencer looked between the trio.

The weight of their gazes quickly caused him to break.

“I was late because I was at the museum with someone.”

At his statement, everyone on the jet turned towards Spencer. Even Hotch had Spencer’s undivided attention.

Emily twisted to face the genius, a smirk on her face as she crossed her arms.

“Go on Romeo, tell us all about them.”

Spencer knew he could not get out of this. So, he began to begrudgingly tell his team about his day and the person he spent it with.

“Then after the gentleman took our picture, I got the call. I said goodbye and rushed over here.”

The team all looked at Spencer with mixtures of pride and happiness.

“Did you get her number?”

The looks soon turned to disbelief as Spencer bowed his head in shock.

“You had an amazing day with a woman you don’t know, which is something unlike you, and you failed to get her number? Pretty boy, I am very disappointed. I’ve taught you better than that.”

Shaking his head at Morgan’s playful words, Spencer couldn’t help his own disappointment take over. He can’t believe he didn’t ask her for her number. Rossi walked over and patted the man on his shoulder in reassurance.

“At least you got a picture to remember her.”

Spencer slowly nodded, solemnly reaching into his breast pocket to pull the picture out. But, as Spencer looked at the picture, he realised that she had handed him the second picture they had taken.

Spencer looked at the polaroid and couldn’t believe how comfortable he looked with her. Their hands interlaced as Y/N smiled brightly towards the camera. Spencer’s smile was directed towards the woman next time him, warm and content. He had never looked so at peace before. Yet, he still forgot to ask for her number.

As Spencer was about the place the picture back in his pocket, he paused his movement as Hotch spoke up.

“If I was you, I would check the back of that picture Reid.”

Looking at the people in front of him, he could see that they were all now smiling, looking at him expectedly, waiting for the man to look at the back of the picture. Flipping the picture over, Spencer couldn’t help the smile that blossomed over his face. His eyes crinkling from how large it was. On the back of the picture, a message was written.

“Meeting you made me feel part of something much bigger. Something I would love to explore. Give me a call if you want to as well.”

Underneath the message lay Y/N’s phone number.

Spencer lifted his head and looked around at his team. Pointing his thumb over his shoulder, he began to stand.

“I’m just going to…”

Emily pushed him up as the rest of the team laughed.

“Hurry up and call her Spence, no point in waiting!”

Spencer nodded his head in a flurry as JJ shooed him to the back of the jet.

Walking passed the team, Rossi and Derek patted him on the back, as Hotch nodded his head. They were all happy for him.

Walking into the jet’s toilet, Spencer locked the door and pulled out his phone. Flipping the picture in his opposing hand, he quickly dialled the number, clicking the call button before he could change his mind.

Just as he contemplated hanging up, the ringing stopped, and he heard an answer.

“Hello?”

“I want to be a part of something bigger. I want to explore it too.”

“Really?”

Spencer could feel the smile radiating from Y/N over the phone. A breathy laugh leaving his mouth as he realised, he was nodding his head instead of talking.

“Really.”

Spencer was not the type of person to sit in the bathroom on a plane talking to someone on the phone that he only met that morning. Even more so, having met that someone because they sat on the floor of the subway instead of the seats. Yet, here he was, in the bathroom talking to Y/N and getting to know her more. Spencer felt like the Willamette Meteorite. He had been broken and steered down different courses over the years, feeling like he would never be part of anything bigger than the family that was his team. But now, he felt like he was finally going to be a part of something bigger. Something extraordinary.

Never expected to meet you. When I met you I never expected you to become my everything and more than I could have ever dreamed of. - Maria Ana Bulquerin.

A/N- Thank you for the support. If you wish to in anyway, Please donate to the link below.

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watevermelon · 4 years

Text

Same Old Love | Kaeya (Genshin) x Traveler!Reader

✧ Summary: Kaeya was mysterious in every way that made you wary. From the gleam in his eye to how easy it was for him to flirt, it made you wonder how much he was presenting was truly real. Not wanting to get sucked in, you swore not to fall for the Cavalry Captain. At least, that was the plan, right? ➳ Notes: Angst with a happy ending ➳ A/N: Thank you so much for the ask!! This was fun to write ((I feel like I write so much angsty/jealousy fics haha)) I’m just getting into genshin and so please feel free to send in requests for these cuties <3 @breathings-of-the-heart

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—xXxXxXxXxXx—

You had some worries about Kaeya, dubbed “The Handsome Mr. Kaeya” by Paimon.

There was no doubt that he was attractive, his ever present smirk and exposed chest was enough to signify to anyone that even Kaeya was well aware of his looks. But he tended to wield his words like a double edged sword - using his words for an express purpose.

It was admirable, in a way. He was the loyal Cavalry Captain who looked out for Mondstadt’s best interest. And while he had misled you on this pirate treasure adventure, there was no harm really done. In fact, from the way he prattled about haircuts and eyepatches inherited from his parents, you were already sure that it was simply a tale being spun for Paimon to latch onto.

At the end of the day, Kaeya still compensated you for your time and provided you with a higher-level weapon. The criminals were caught and the Knights were credited for another arrest of an infamous Treasure Hunter. It was a win-win situation that you very quickly put behind you as another job done.

The entire quest had not really bothered you - it was not like you had not withheld anything either. You ran from clue to clue without updating Kaeya on your progress, with the express intent of snagging some of this treasure yourself.

It was a really smart move on his part and, for whatever reason, it had the inverse effect on you - it made you want to get closer to Kaeya.

Paimon grumbled for all of a day before she prattled onto something new, complaining about the returning ruin guard by the temple or the way Venti sassed her. But you often found yourself hanging around Good Hunter or Angel’s Share, wondering if you would be able to run into him again.

It was no surprise that Kaeya was always busy, Jean had mentioned before that Kaeya was the one who often wrapped up every physical incident that occurred in both the city and outer plains of Mondstadt.

And so it was easy to lose track of him, the image of Kaeya still present in your mind, just pushed back in the further recess as you continued in your struggle to find clues about your brother. When whispers on the street spoke of a Dark Knight hero, you were pleasantly surprised to see Diluc patrolling the streets from the shadows.

The last thing you had expected was to team-up with the very man who ran opposite to the Knights, but you learned how oddly sweet Diluc was in that short amount of time. His double life of fighting off the abyss army single-handedly to running the largest Winery on the continent - Diluc’s workload was no easy feat.

You were just out of the clear, Huffman gone to deal with the slimes when a resounding clap started from the dining area of the bar. Kaeya stood and approached you both, you turned to Diluc and he had the flattest, most unimpressed expression on.

You stood mostly silent in that conversation, Diluc with his arms and chin held high. Kaeya had reassured him that the secret was best kept that way, eyes glinting mischievously as they went from the winery owner to you.

You only stared right back, as if Kaeya’s face would give off exactly what he was looking for. Instead, he simply smiled at the both of you and left when Diluc said he was closing the bar. Diluc thanked you for your assistance, reassuring you that in case you need help, he was a willing hand.

When you walked out the bar then, Kaeya was still right outside, chatting casually with some of the late bar-goers that sat at the picnic table. Just as he made eye-contact with you, he bid himself goodbye from the group and fell into step with you.

“Paimon doesn’t trust blue-haired, eye-patched men anymore.” She started next to you.

“That’s good I’m a blue-haired, eye-patched handsome young man.” Kaeya shot back, to which she rolled her eyes. He then turned to you with the same open smirk as usual, “And here I was thinking I could make you my assistant.”

Was he flirting with you?

It took you a second to question this internally before Paimon scoffed, “Ugh, I’m going ahead to the inn. I don’t think I can stand watching you make kissy-faces at each other after the day we had.”

You waved a hand in her direction to smack her, but she was already flying away up and out of reach.

Turning back to the Captain, you were surprised to see that Kaeya was still looking at you, not even toward Paimon as she fled into the night.

Remembering his last statement, you shot back, “Think you could handle me?”

“Confidence, it looks very good on you.” Kaeya replied as his smile widened. He took a single step closer, lowering his voice next to your ear and continuing. “But the real question is if you have any idea what you’re getting yourself into?”

You stood your ground, ignoring the shiver that ran up your spine, “I always like to try new things.”

“I look forward to it.” Kaeya straightened, lightly grabbing your hand in one of his own and raising it to his lips. “Until then, traveler.”

To think that such a simple action, hardly anything scandalous, had lingered on your skin the entire night. You remembered the way his lips felt against your hand, how striking his blue eyes bore into your own. Kaeya was extremely dangerous, able to catch your attention and keep it for hours on end.

The next day you had a commission about dismantling a rising Hilichurl camp, a perfect distraction away from the eye-patched hunk that kept plaguing your thoughts. The last thing you expected was for Kaeya to see you.

“Looks like our honorary knight continues their do-good streak.”

“It’s the least I can do.” You replied back, a sassy hand on your waist.

“Why don’t I accompany you?”

You wanted to scream.

Paimon actually did groan before stating she was going to stay in the city.

And suddenly, your distraction was running exactly opposite to your intention. With Kaeya joining your party, the Cavalry Captain was making himself decidedly known you.

He led you around a cliff, showing you a higher area where you could survey the camp before bursting in guns blazing. There were six Hilichurls, some slimes scattered about and two towers already set-up in this enemy campsite.

You decided to stick together, coming in from the high ground and slamming your weapon into the ground at unsuspecting enemies. It felt nice to fight alongside someone again, oftentimes you were alone in your adventures. Paimon would yell words of encouragement, but never would she actually lift a finger to fight. But Kaeya was reliable, freezing enemies into place and shattering them where they stood.

Taking down some of the outer-rim electro Hilichurls equipped with bows, you were nearly finished with clearing the entire camp. You grabbed the pyro slimes and exploded them near the towers, taking down the camp with them. With the camp almost completely disassembled, you heard the tell-tale electronic power-up that only signified one enemy.

A ruin guard.

Hunched over, you watched as multiple missiles took aim on the nearby unsuspecting Cavalry Captain. Running the best you could, you threw decorum out the window as you all but tackled the poor man out of harm's way.

Rolling a few times, there was no surprised yelp from the man beneath you. He simply allowed you to take the wheel until you came to a stop, hovering over his body. Kaeya was undoubtedly taller than you, but you were face-to-face as he smirked beneath you.

“Wow, not that I’m against this.” Kaeya started, a quip ready. “But ask me out to dinner first.”

You flushed and stood up immediately, “I was saving you!”

“I’ll let you save me any day of the week.” Kaeya replied, earning a half-assed scowl on your behalf. He only laughed at you, calling your attempted look of intimidation only served to make a cute pout instead.

You huffed and considered leaving him with the ruin guard.

From then on there was no doubt about it - Kaeya was flirting with you.

And you were openly flirting back, if of course he decided a less obnoxious moment. In between commissions and nights at Angel’s Share, Kaeya flirtations were growing more and more brazen. It was one thing to kiss the top of your hand in greeting and another entirely for Kaeya to throw his hand across your hair, leaning in to openly bury his nose in your hair.

Diluc called you both disgusting.

Tonight, you entered Cat Tail’s semi-inconspicuously to get a drink. Paimon had long caught onto your game, saying that she surprisingly approved of Kaeya, since after all he was still a good guy in some ways.

But, she still was not exactly a fan of you too making “kissy-faces” at each other, her words. And so tonight you were flying solo, Paimon opting to annoy Amber instead tonight as they tracked down some abyss mage or other.

You tried your best to hang around the bar, looking around the tavern to see if the object of your desire was anywhere around. You meandered for a few minutes, saying greetings to other bargoers that had recognized you, before approaching the bartender if Kaeya has been around

The bartender recognized you immediately. It was hard not to place one of the few new people in Mondstadt, especially one that was crushing much of the country's enemies. Diona had mentioned before that you were a friend of Diluc’s, often more than just a customer at the rival tavern. No, you were seen running around the city with the red-head at random times.

She said the worst thing you could have ever suspected.

“I think Kaeya has a hot date tonight.”

You felt a lump in your throat form, but tried to keep your response guarded. “Oh?”

The bartender continued, “Yeah, I’m not sure if it was Paula? Or Maggie tonight? But you know the captain - always changing up his escapades.”

“Right, of course.” You replied back, words coming out before you could even register it. Instead, you kept on nursing your drink, spiteful words from the bartender marinating in your mind.

Kaeya was mysterious, yes. But was he leading you on?

… Was it right of you to trust him?

The first red flag should have been the fact that you knew nearly nothing about him personally. To think that you had spent all this time together talking and fighting alongside one another, but you could not even recall basic facts about him, let alone anything deep. You were unaware of his family history - Diluc was his brother, but it was the red-head who ended up confiding that fact to you.

Kaeya was so charming that you hadn’t even noticed he shut you out of his world.

And so there was no point in actively keeping a one-sided friendship like that. From then forth, you resolved to avoid the Cavalry Captain for the time being. You knew you had to free Dvalin together, but that did not mean you had to swoon for him in your free time.

It was almost expected of you to join him on Friday nights at Angel’s Share, but tonight you were missing. Neither Charles nor Diluc had seen you the entire day. There were probably a hundred different things you were doing - gathering resources, fighting slimes - and so Kaeya thought little of it.

But he was still disappointed not to see your face that night.

And so he thought nothing was wrong the next day when he saw you in the city square, talking to someone at the general store. He approached you and offered to join your party again, take down some enemies somewhere out in the country.

You didn’t even smile at him.

Not this time.

Just a curt no before you were leaving out the city gates.

The second time Kaeya already had enough and confronted you before you could even attempt to walk away.

He grabbed at your elbow, “Have you finally grown tired of me?”

You pulled it back, no real strength behind it as Kaeya still held you under his grip. “Kaeya, why is it that you keep reaching out to me? I have nothing of my own to offer - no money, no family - there is nothing left I can give you.”

He frowned in response but grabbed at your other hand, “I haven’t asked you for anything, have I?”

You looked away, “You don’t have to! It’s inherent, after all. Isn’t that why you asked me to team-up in the first place, to use me to find your criminals?”

Kaeya mentally recoiled, “Woah, back up. I may have guided you regarding the treasure but never have I maliciously led you on.”

You pulled at your hands to no avail, this time the captain actively trying to keep your attention on him.

“I just! I thought I meant something more to you, Kaeya.”

He smiled and tried to pull you into his chest, but you shoved off his touch this time fully.

“No! You can’t just hug me and think everything is okay. You’re supposed to be one of the good guys, one of the handful of people I can trust in Mondstadt and I know nothing about you.”

Kaeya did not reach for your hands, instead moving to stand in front of you. “I’m sorry that I hold my secrets close to my chest, but that’s what I’m used to.”

Frustrated, you replied. “Don’t you get tired? Holding the people that love you at an arm's length?”

“I’m sorry.” He repeated, this time reaching for you. “I’m sorry that I made you feel like you weren’t special. Trust me, you’re the only one I’ve had eyes on ever since you landed here in Mondstadt.”

You shook your head, “But the bartender, she said -”

“Who cares what she said?” Kaeya interrupted, “They know village gossip, but they don’t know me or you.”

“I don’t really know you.” You replied.

Kaeya caressed the side of your cheek before lightly gently grabbing your hand again, “Then let’s start.”

With a hesitant smile, you closed your eyes and nodded.

“Okay.”

You had your doubts then and it’s not like an issue of trust was fixed overnight. But, to his credit, Kaeya tried as best he could. Instead of meeting randomly at the bar, he would approach you sometime during the day and set-up a date. How he knew where you were was a mystery, but a man with that many connections surely had a way.

He had no qualms about holding your hand or openly kissing your cheek in the presence of others - proclaiming loudly to one and all in Mondstadt that you were his and he was yours.

Taking your first argument to heart, Kaeya was very keen on communication. Anything you were unsure of, he expressed that he was by no means rushing you. And when you finally shared your first kiss, for once not a single soul in front of the Lord Barbatos statue, you leaned into his touch to get many more.

Kaeya made good on his promise, slowly letting you into his world in kind. You remembered one night as the both of you sat on the edge of Mondstadt, nothing but ocean for miles in front of you. You had your head on his shoulder, describing your adventures with your brother and how you missed having family.

Kaeya had a gentle hand in your hair, rubbing soothing circles as you recalled a time long ago. Once your story finished, you two continued to stare out, wondering what the future could hold as your minds swam in an endless sea of thoughts.

He broke the silence.

“I miss my brother also.”

Diluc was not always his estranged brother, but once a friend, supporter, and sounding board. Some even mistook them as truly twins in heart and mind, defending Mondstadt and having each other’s backs for years. The Diluc you had come to know was a shell of his old self, close friends and past hidden behind years of repressed feelings.

There was no doubt wistfulness in Kaeya’s eyes as he recalled the past to you, but you continued to listen quietly.

Your relationship with the Cavalry Captain was hardly easy. Often responsibilities called you both - Kaeya was highly stationed in Mondstadt while you still had seven other countries to visit. But that did not mean the end for you both. Even when you were thousands of miles away or sat atop the highest mountain without a clue to where he was, you cherished the thought that you still shared the same sky with the love of your life.

No matter where you were in Teyvat, you had Kaeya to return to.

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