#I’m so fucking sick of seeing this happen over and over literally fucking everywhere.

[librarycards]

the goal is to punish transfems for being too smart, talented, popular, and successful. Like that’s it. Remember a few years ago when a bunch of them were literally writing original theoretical interventions on gender & sexual politics for free? And then TME people were throwing a temper tantrum bc they were using ewwwwe big iNaCcEsSiBlE1!1!!1 words? and think about how that relates to sports bans irl that only get floated when trans girls win at things? like this is part and parcel of a broader cisheteropatriarchal discourse that punishes feminized ppl for success & pride in their work that only redoubles when deployed against multiply- marginalized women, incl. trans women & transfems broadly. There is a larger & more expansive conversation here about how transfems are punished for failing AND for being ‘mediocre’ AND for succeeding/being exceptional. Just living is impossible.

[mattitties]

Boyfriend, pt 2 - matt sturniolo

you guys asked, so i delivered (hopefully)

part 1 here

I left the party last night feeling on top of the world. I recounted everything to my best friend the second Matt had left and she came back to me.

“I came back from the bathroom and saw you guys totally hitting it off, so I just stood back and watched. I thought he was about to bend you over the bar and fuck you right there,” she told me. 

It’s now the next morning and I’m trying to distract myself and not think about the fact that he hasn’t texted me yet. It’s only 10 AM, so I really shouldn’t be worried, but as someone who doesn’t talk to boys literally ever, I am naturally very worried. 

As the hours pass and it’s now 2 PM, I go into my roommate’s room. “Why hasn’t he texted me? Do you think he was just fucking with me? What if I didn’t give him the right number and he’s now texting some other hotter bitch instead of me? What if I was-” I start to ramble before she cuts me off.

“Oh my god, shut up! It’s been like 14 hours, chill out! He’s gonna text you, and if he doesn’t, he doesn’t. We don’t know anything about him, he could be sleeping still or he could be having a busy day. Take a Xanax or something, good gracious,” she tells me, finishing just as my phone vibrates.

I check it absentmindedly, fully expecting it to be my mom or a spam text, but instead I see an unknown number.

Hey it’s Matt, just wanted to see when your free to hang out?

I let out a shriek and show my roommate my screen.

“Fucking told you!” she says excitedly before her face changes. “Oh boy, he’s one of the fuckers who doesn’t know the difference between your and you’re. You gotta fix that.”

“Oh for sure,” I say, starting to type in my phone.

hey :) i’m free tonight or tmr if either of those work

Tonight is good, I can pick you up around 6 and we can get dinner. How does Boa sound?

“Oh my god. He wants to take me to Boa,” I tell my roommate. I’m just about on the verge of vomiting everywhere.

“Oh fuck yeah! Mr. Moneybags over here!” she cheers.

that sounds great!

Sick, whats your addy so I know where to pick up my gf ;)

I give him my address, turn off my phone, and immediately go to my room to take an everything shower and get ready.

I’m finishing up my hair at 5:30 when I get another text: Leaving now, be there in 15 min. I made reservation for 6

I don’t know why I’m so nervous. I was so confident around him last night, but now I feel like a completely different person. I’m terrified I’m gonna be an awkward mess when I get in the car and he’s gonna wonder what happened to the girl he met last night and I won’t even be able to eat I’m so nervous and–

Nope, I’m not worrying anymore. It’s gonna be fine. I triple check everything to make sure I look good, and finally he texts that he’s here.

I grab my bag, go downstairs, and open the front door to our apartment complex, where I’m met with a very familiar face standing next to it. He’s wearing a black short sleeve collared shirt, blue jeans, and a black baseball cap he put on backwards. Man, he looks good as fuck. 

He looks up when he sees me and smiles. “Hi,” he says. “Car’s right there. I was going to come in but then I saw I had to be buzzed into the building and I didn’t know which apartment was yours, so…” It seems that his confidence from last night has lessened quite a bit as well, as now he’s just awkwardly rambling. I find it adorable.

I shake my head and smile. “You’re fine, this is perfect.” I follow his lead to his car, and am surprised when he opens the passenger door for me. “Thank you,” I say as I get in, and he shoots me another quick smile before closing the door and going to the driver’s side. 

“So Boa, huh? You really are trying to show off your YouTube bucks,” I joke.

“Me and my brothers go there a lot, it’s not really that expensive,” he says. 

“Speak for yourself! I was looking at the menu and almost had an aneurysm at the prices!”

He laughs and glances at me. “Well lucky for you, you’re not the one paying, are you?”

We continue our banter for a few minutes before there’s a lull in the conversation. “Do you wanna put some music on? Here’s the aux cord,” he tells me, pulling out a cord.

“Oh,” I say, immediately regretting all my life choices. I am historically NEVER on aux in any situation because my music taste is comprised of Taylor Swift, dad rock, and depressing music. “Um… you may not like my music. We can just play whatever you like.”

He looks at me wearing a tiny frown. “What! You’re the passenger, you get aux. Whatever you play will be fine.”

I sigh dramatically as I plug my phone in and queue Taylor. “Okay, but if you don’t like it, just remember I gave you a chance to say no.” He nods. I watch his face to gauge his reaction as “The Story of Us” starts to play, and I roll my lips into my mouth to hide my laughter when he recognizes the voice. 

“Yayyyy,” he says sarcastically. “I love Taylor Swift…”

The rest of the drive consists of me explaining to him that if he was willing to give her music a try, he would definitely enjoy her music. I was fully expecting him to laugh it off and come back with some smart ass comment about her as nearly every other man does, but he seemed genuinely interested in what I was saying. “You’re right,” he told me. “Maybe we can listen together and you can show me more of her stuff!”

I think I fell in love right there.

When we arrive at Boa, the man nearly eats shit rushing around to open the passenger door for me, and walks slightly ahead of me to get the door for the restaurant. Neither of us have any ounce of the same flirty energy we had last night, but there’s no awkwardness at all. I still can’t believe this is happening. The hottest guy I’ve ever seen, he’s a perfect gentleman, we have so much in common, and he’s actually into me? It seems far too good to be true.

“So,” I say when we get seated, “what exactly made you feel the need to come up to me last night? Did I really look that uncomfortable?”

“Oh, you looked like you were about ready to sink into the floor. I mean, in all honesty, I was kind of eyeing you all night but I didn’t have the courage to come up to you, so I guess I sort of used that as an excuse to do something. Plus saving you from creepy guy and all,” he replies.

“Well, thank you, no matter what your reasoning was.” I look around the restaurant. I feel so out of place, it’s disgusting. I’ve only lived in LA for a couple months, so I still feel like I don’t belong, especially when I end up in the same restaurants that people get papped outside of. But somehow, even in a place like this, I feel oddly safe and at peace with a man that I met not even 24 hours prior. 

I’ve never been much of a great conversationalist; if I’m in a one on one conversation, the other person needs to be a rambler for it to not be awkward. But he’s not a rambler, and we both are just so invested in what the other person is saying that it’s somehow a never ending conversation. We have so much in common – our love for movies, Legos, journaling, us both attempting to get back into reading after going so long without it – I feel like I’ve known him my whole life. It’s so refreshing, and it’s terrifying. I know I’m going to fall for him fast. I may be already, but I can’t be. We just met. 

He pulls me out of my trance by repeating his question. “You ready to go?”

“What? Oh, yeah, sorry. Um, thanks for paying,” I smile as I get up. 

“Of course! What kind of a man would I be if I didn’t pay on our first date?” he jokes. 

“Ohhh, our first date? Does that imply there’ll be a second?” I ask as I get in the car.

“Would you like there to be a second?” 

“I mean I guess…” I smirk at him. We’re both looking at each other, smiling ever so slightly. I want nothing more than to kiss him right now, and I’m 99% sure he wants the same based on the way his eyes are shifting focus from my eyes to my lips. I’m about to lean in when –

“I should get you home.”

Oh. I nod. “Yeah… yeah, probably.” I sit back in my seat.

He turns on the car and Taylor Swift blasts through the speakers. “JESUS–” he yells, turning the volume down as we both start laughing. “I know I said you could show me her stuff but let’s take it down a notch, god damn!”

We don’t talk at all during the drive home, but it’s nice. Just the music in the background, and subtle glances between us every so often. When we pull up in front of my apartment complex, he parks the car and turns it off, then starts to get out.

“You don’t need to get out, it’s okay,” I tell him.

“Well I have to make sure you get into your apartment safe, don’t I?” Again, what a gentleman. I didn’t even think people like him existed anymore. I smile to myself and lead the way, taking him up to the 4th floor and down the hall to my door. “I guess this is where I leave you?” he asks.

“Unfortunately, this is where you leave me.” I’m looking up at him, he’s looking down at me. I can tell he wants to say something, and I hope it’s what I think it is.

He opens his mouth, takes a sharp inhale. “Can I kiss you?”

Bingo. I smile and nod, holding his jaw lightly in my hand. He takes my waist with one hand and the back of my head with the other, and our lips collide softly in a matter of seconds. I haven’t kissed many guys, but they’ve always felt just a little off and I never knew why. But this? This feels right. It’s gentle, but our tongues slip into each other's mouths as the kiss grows deeper. I know I need to stop this here, as much as I don’t want to. I give in for a few more seconds before I pull back. 

“I, um… I need to go inside,” I tell him, completely unable to wipe the smile off my face.

“Okay,” he says, pushing a piece of hair behind my ear. “I’ll text you, because yes, there definitely will be a second date.”

“Good.” I kiss him one last time before I unlock my door. “Goodnight, Matt.”

“Goodnight.”

———————————————————————

i probably won’t do a part 3 because idk how to keep it interesting from here but if you have other fic requests lmk and i’ll do my best 😚

[faramirsonofgondor]

Insane how many TV show characters have incredibly traumatic backstories or go through a shit load of trauma only for the writers to be like “yea and then they became an asshole and ruined all their relationship for no reason whatsoever.” and then they’ll be like “what do you mean that’s so out of character? no it’s not i literally wrote the character.” LIKE YES BITCH and they used to be a GOOD person and friend??? they would do anything for their friends and family??? ANYTHING. they spent eons trying to fit in and they dedicated so much time making sure their family was safe. and now you’re saying that they’re just selfish out of nowhere???

OR EVEN WORSE. when they fucking forgive their abuser for no reason or because their abuser was on drugs or addicted to alcohol. and then they get sober and magically become a better person??? what??? you mean the person who neglected their child??? the person who abused their child??? AND THE SAME CHILD GETS HATED ON FOR BEING RUDE OR EMOTIONALLY UNAVAILABLE AND PEOPLE STILL DON’T TRUST THEM OR LIKE THEM EVEN AFTER THEY MADE CONSIDERABLE EFFORTS TO UNLEARN THE HABITS THEY DEVELOPED TO SURVIVE THE ABUSE THEY WENT THROUGH??? IM SO TIRED OF SEEING THIS HAPPEN IN SO MANY TV SHOWS. LIKE IF IT WAS ONCE OR TWICE I WOULD BE ANNOYED BUT ITS FUCKING EVERYWHERE.

Just to be clear I’m not talking about shows that have established characters perpetuating the cycle of abuse from the beginning, or progressively getting worse over time, because while I don’t necessarily like those plot lines, they can make sense when they’re done right. But I fucking hate it when it comes out of nowhere and ruins all the backstory the character had and goes against all their earlier motivations.

And while I don’t particularly like it in TV shows when a character forgives their abuser, I can understand it when the abuser actually realizes the weight of their actions, doesn’t try to excuse them, and makes efforts to do better. But almost all TV shows where the character forgives their abusers ends up with the one who was abused being labeled as a problem child or too much to handle/too difficult and the abuser gets to be forgiven without any real development or apology or effort.

Like there’s so many different examples of this happening - Jamie & James Sr. from Ted Lasso, Jess & Liz from Gilmore Girls, Buck & his parents from 9-1-1, Shawn & Henry from Psych (I said what I said), like half of the entire MCU, and multitude of other characters. Like all of the kids were emotionally neglected and abused (and sometimes physically as well) and then they “acted out” (they insulted people, were maybe a little bitchy, and acted immaturely) and then somehow them acting out and being immature or eccentric becomes a central point of their character, and other characters are often annoyed or upset with this part of the character. But then the adult who yk, abused their fucking child, is viewed sympathetically by the other characters because they “were having such a hard time” and “were really struggling” while they were abusing their child. And now that their kid is all grown up they “don’t want to have a bad relationship” and “only ever wanted what was best for them, they just didn’t know to how give it to them”. LIKE GIVE ME A FUCKING BREAK MAN.

How is it the kids fault they were a bit immature or a bit of an asshole after being abused for their whole life but it’s not their abusers fault for abusing them???? like what the fuck??? Like it makes me sick to my stomach when other characters are like “wow it must have been so hard to raise them” when they literally DIDN’T raise them, they fucking abused them. Don’t even get me started on when they give the abused kid an actual parental figure and the abused kid opens up to them about how hard their life was and the parental figure does their best to support the kid only to turn around and encourage the kid to forgive their fucking abuser. Like what are these writers even on????

Anyways fuck forgiveness for the sake of forgiveness. You don’t need to forgive shit just because your abuser had a sad backstory. Womp Womp for them. Addiction doesn’t excuse abuse. Grief doesn’t excuse abuse. Divorce doesn’t excuse abuse. “Wanting what’s best for you” “being raised in a different time” or being “misguided”isn’t an excuse for abuse. Them having abusive parents isn’t an excuse for abuse. There isn’t an excuse for abuse. You don’t need to (and IMO shouldn’t) forgive an abuser just because they’re at a better or more stable point in their life than they were when they abused you or because they suddenly got FOMO and realized they’re gonna die soon and they don’t want a shitty relationship with you. And if they and other people are pressuring you to forgive them, then they clearly don’t realize the weight of their actions or how serious they were.

[birdiewriteslit]

wildest dreams

luke hughes x abigail abernathy

masterlist

okay ik i haven’t updated this in a literal month so im finally feeding you my apologies for the wait

“Get up.” Jack said, grabbing the pillow from underneath Luke’s head and throwing it across the room.

Luke groaned, planting his face into the mattress. “What do you want?” he asked curtly, voice muffled by the sheets.

“It’s 1pm, we have practice in an hour, you’re a mess, I’m mad at you,” Jack listed, yanking the comforter off of his body.

Luke shivered and rolled over, shielding his eyes from the sun streaming in through the window. “What have you got to be mad about?”

“I haven’t heard from Abigail since she left, which, by the way, I know was your fault. Plus, you’ve been moody ever since she did, even though you’ve got no right to be.” Jack paused, taking a breath. “And I know what happened on New Year’s.”

Luke sat up on the bed, rubbing a hand over his tired eyes. “Then you know I’ve got some right. She’s the one who doesn’t.”

Jack rolled his eyes, throwing his hands up in exasperation. “Fine, be an idiot. See if I care. Don’t take it out on Abigail when all she did was like you. You’re probably not used to girls liking you though.”

“She doesn’t like me, she’s fucking Rudy,” Luke mumbled.

“You really are an idiot. Seriously, get out of bed or I’m leaving without you.”

Jack left the room and Luke let his head fall into his hands. He grabbed his phone from the bedside table, staring at Abigail’s smiling face on his lockscreen, and feeling worse about the whole thing.

He listened to the voicemail, and he felt sick to his stomach. He knew he shouldn’t have yelled at her, but seeing her with Rudy set something off in his mind.

Granted, he had a jealousy problem since they were kids and Abigail would come to Toronto talking about all of her Boston friends, but things were a lot different now.

When Abigail got a job on Shameless, Luke couldn’t be prouder, and when it came out, she was so excited to watch it with him.

It was just her and him that night at the lake, the others having gone to bed. “I can’t watch this with my parents,” Abby had said, clinging to Luke’s arm in excitement.

He figured that meant she was topless in a scene. He’d seen Shameless before, and he couldn’t lie about being a little excited about her debut. He was 17, after all.

What he wasn’t expecting, however, was a full on sex scene between her and a costar, who still comments on her Instagram posts.

That was the moment he realized that things were changing in Abigail’s world. He thought about how other guys would be looking at her, thinking about her.

Then Outer Banks came around, and she started dating Rudy. He had to act like he liked the guy, but in reality he hated the way it made him feel seeing Abigail with another guy.

For a whole year he had to watch her with him. She even brought him to the lake once, and then after that trip, he broke up with her over Luke.

So, naturally, he didn’t like it when he saw Abigail was hanging around a guy like that again.

He replayed the voicemail. “Fuck,” he said out loud. “I fucked up.”

abyabynathy

tagged jamie.drysdale, philadelphiaflyers

Liked by jamie.drysdale, _quinnhughes and 1,967,346 others

abyabynathy baby’s first flyers game

View comments

trevorzegras the plot thickens

jamie.drysdale omg that’s me

abyabynathy @/jamie.drysdale sniped

cam.york we have fun

abyabynathy @/cam.york so much fun

philadelphiaflyers Have we converted you to a flyers fan??

abyabynathy @/philadelphiaflyers you gotta win first

jackhughes @/abyabynathy SHOTS FIRED

nhlbruins @/philadelphiaflyers Back off.

_quinnhughes why are you everywhere besides vancouver

abyabynathy @/_quinnhughes some day i might make it there

jackhughes this is interesting

trevorzegras @/jackhughes VERY interesting

abyabynathy @/trevorzegras stop conspiring

user1 what is going on

January 8, 2024

messages 10:36 pm

jack: if you’re trying to make luke mad it’s working

jack: but i can tell he feels guilty for whatever he did

jack: it’s actually a weird combination and i don’t like it

jack: pls fix it

abigail: i tried to fix it but he’s an ass idk what to tell you

abigail: i’m not trying to make him mad but it’s not my fault he freaks out when i breath near anyone else

jack: why the fart are you in philly then

abigail: bc i wanted to see my friend jamie

jack: and you had to do this in the midst of this drama

jack: you and luke need to figure this shit out cuz i’m tired of you hurting each other

jack: shit pisses me off

abigail: okay i admit i knew it would make him mad but he fucking screamed at me and hasn’t spoken to me since his tantrum

jack: he will he just needs time to cool down

read 10:43 pm

—

taglist: @alwaysclassyeagle

[sasukesgucciflops]

Here I am back on my John Marston BS.

I pointed this out before ab how ppl loved calling John “watered down” but I’m also seeing people forget that he was also put on a very high fucking pedestal and had no idea how to handle it. In other words; he was the gifted kid who got burnt out after everyone expected everything from him. John never expected to be seen as such. He actually preferred to not be held to such a degree. I’m sick and tired of people feeding into the “John’s a golden boy” “John’s a piece of shit” narrative. Clearly these people have only seen RDR2 and have no clue about everything in RDR1 and yes I’m giving an attitude so y’all better catch it.

Here’s my John Marston character analysis and this is only about one aspect of him. (Wait until you see every other aspect bc I’ve literally dissected this man like a frog oops)

He never fucking asked for it. In fact, he didn’t expect jack shit from anybody. If anything, people used him. People used him up. You see it plainly in rdr1, he’s being used to hunt down his old partners. To find his old partners he’s gotta ask the sheriff, what does the sheriff do? He uses him to handle some lowlife gangs around the county. The sheriff ACCIDENTALLY—not even voluntarily—reveals someone that ends up somewhat helping him out. West Dickens—and what does he do? Uses him. Seth? Uses him. Travels over to another country, what do they do? USE HIM!

Okay, so rdr2—if you couldn’t get the picture already—John was one of Dutch’s MAIN PAWNS. That man raised John to USE HIM. John was young and had lots of energy and he was gullible enough to let Dutch do whatever with his naivety. The most fucked up thing about all of it, not only about how (almost) everyone saw him as a pawn, not as a genuine friend, saw him only for his uses;

John didn’t care. He knew he was being used but he didn’t care. Yes it bothers him and again he’s fully aware he’s being ran around in circles by all these people; it doesn’t matter. He sees himself as someone who is replaceable. He’s expendable. It’s whatever. He was always made to think this and perhaps he knew that it was his fate to be all used up and thrown out like it was nothing. And that’s what ended up happening.

No, he wasn’t a perfect father. He SHOULDVE done much much better about that. Just for that I let anti’s breathe a little because in Jack’s younger years, hell no John wasn’t a good father! John was in denial, busy trying to live up to his dreams of being someone he isn’t. On that note, John slowly realized that Abigail and Jack were probably the only ones that didn’t see him as a pawn; they just wanted him to be present and that causes him to do a 180. To him, it was worth dying for them. Maybe he felt as if he owed them a debt that could never be repayed—it’s almost like he expresses this to Jack a dozen different times. “I’m sorry, Son. I’m not going anywhere.” And “I know I wasn’t around a lot for you but I’m trying to make up for that”. He becomes viscerally aware of the damage of his absence (as he should) and it becomes something he fears he’ll never get to make up for.

Abigail never wanted to use him. She just wanted HIM. Jack—OF COURSE never wanted to use him, he wanted a FATHER. Honorable mention, but Arthur never saw him as a pawn either. In fact, he was well aware of how John was being treated, even mentioning it to him canonically, along the lines of, and I’m loosely quoting this, “At first you’ll be a prize pony until you become a work horse”. These people become so important to John—among others such as Bonnie, Charles, Sadie, even Uncle—because they never tried to use. him. John was more than expendable to them, he was worth something to them and for that he loved them and felt as if he would owe them for eternity.

I truly can’t believe some of y’all completely miss that whole point because it’s written EVERYWHERE it’s literally how John’s story goes and we experience it with him. His story is so fucking tragic and yes, while Arthur was the prime example of “having a doomed narrative from the start”, people don’t talk about how John is literally in the same boat. That man was always doomed, by his friends, the people he would try to call family—he was raised all the way up just to be put down…. THAT’S the story of John fucking Marston.

[finn-m-corvex]

Whumptober 2023 Day 5 - Pinned Down

Day 5! And this one is MOVIEVERSE! I REPEAT: MOVIEVERSE! I wanted a bit of a challenge so a few of these are going to be set within the movie! Also movie!Jay is an absolute bean but he swears like a sailor and I will die on this hill.

@splinnters fifth tag! You better be asleep by now good sir

Words: 2.2k

This wasn’t supposed to happen. 

Garmadon wasn’t supposed to strike during the middle of the school day, his plane wasn’t supposed to get shot down out of the sky, and he was not supposed to crash it directly into a building that was already crumbling from the attack. Jay had tried to hit the eject button only for it to fail, so he had no other choice than to sit tight and hope that the impact didn’t kill him.

It didn’t, but Jay could still feel the whiplash that hit his neck as his head slammed against the console, his helmet the only thing saving him from certain doom. He had been knocked out almost instantly, and when he finally came around there were voices screaming at him over the still-functioning radio and blood trickling down from his forehead.

“Jay!” Cole yelled, and Jay could hear the sounds of missiles detonating over the comms. “What the hell happened?!”

He must’ve been talking for some time, so Jay fumbled to press the button and activate his mic. “Cole? I’m here.”

‘Oh thank the First Master,” Lloyd sighed, and Jay winced from his volume. His mask must’ve gotten shoved up closer to his mouth. “Did anyone see where he went down?”

“He is near the corner of Main and Fourth,” Zane chimed in, and Jay’s heart started sinking. Nobody was patrolling in that direction, which meant that there was no one nearby and they were all still fighting a battle. He was on his own.

Which immediately posed a problem when he tried to move his leg.

A short scream escaped his lips when he tried to pull his leg out, and Jay felt the tears sting at the corners of his eyes. Glancing down, the sight of mangled metal buried in his leg almost made him sick. White-hot pain shot up his thigh from his calf, and Jay bit down on his hand to keep from screaming again as his head hit the back of his seat.

He was trapped.

The others must’ve heard him, because Nya was hurriedly clicking onto the channel. “What the hell was that?”

“I’m stuck,” Jay said, “m-my leg’s pinned. I can’t get it out.”

“How stuck?” Kai asked, and Jay heard the screeching of metal on metal through the comms before Kai’s flamethrower ignited, the whoosh familiar as well as the yells of whoever Kai was fighting against.

Jay really did not want to look at it again, but he did have to assess the injury. His leg was burning with pain, his nerves alight with the sensation as he leaned down to try and get a better look at what had happened. Of course, it looked like one of the pylons had gone straight through his leg; not enough to take it off, but definitely enough to pin him in place and start to cause problems.

Why was he so calm about almost having his leg forcibly amputated?

“It’s gone through my leg,” Jay said lightly, his voice betrayed absolutely none of his inner turmoil, “so I can’t move. I also can’t remove it because I don’t know what’ll happen or if it’s structurally sound.”

Silence rang over the comms, and Jay waited patiently for his team to respond. It wasn’t like he was going anywhere. “Buddy, are you okay?” Cole asked hesitantly.

“Oh yes, Cole, I’m just peachy! I’m stuck in this stupid fucking cockpit and there’s a metal rod stuck in my leg and I dunno how to fix it and there’s enemies everywhere and you guys are across the city and I’m going to flip my shit because what if I lose my fucking leg?!” and there it was. Everything was falling apart around him, literally and metaphorically, and Jay’s vision started to tunnel as he struggled to take a deep breath. He wanted to pull his knees up into his chest and bury his face in them, but any movement of his leg only brought more tears to his eyes.

“Breathe,” Nya tried to say, but Jay only took a harsh inhale through his nose in panic-fuelled rage.

“My jet is fucked! My leg is fucked! I’M fucked!” Jay yelled. “So what do you mean ‘breathe’?!”

“It’s not going to get better if you keep panicking, so I need you to calm down,” Nya said soothingly; the others stayed quiet, trusting her to take control of the situation. “I’m on my way, okay? Just hang tight, we’ll get you out of there.”

He couldn’t calm down. The rod shifted, making him see stars as his head knocked against the side of the cockpit. All it took was one sob to open the floodgates, and suddenly he couldn’t stop. “I’m scared, Nya, I’m scared and it hurts and I don’t know what to do-”

“I know,” Nya said, “I know, that’s why I need you to breathe for me, Jay. In for three, hold for four, out for seven, can you do that for me?”

“Yeah,” and Jay tried, he really did, but the sight of Garmadon’s forces flying high over his head, twisting and turning through the air as they made a beeline for where the others were already fighting, drowned out any common sense that may have stuck around at the beginning of his panic attack.

If they saw him, he was as good as dead.

And they were getting pretty damn close.

“Fuck!” Jay cursed, pushing hard at his shattered windshield. “Come on, come on!”

“What happened?” Lloyd asked, alarmed. Jay kept banging at the windshield, ignoring the shards of glass cutting through his gloves and the pain radiating from his wrists.

“Garmadon’s army is coming!” he said, and he could hear the sharp intake of breath from the rest of the group. “I’m pinned down, and I can’t get out!”

“Cole, Nya, get to him now,” Lloyd ordered, and Jay felt his heart lift when he saw the green ninja’s mech shoot across the sky, already tearing through the hordes of planes flying through the city. “Kai and Zane, we’re running defense. Don’t let them get close until Jay is clear.”

“On it, boss,” Kai said, and Zane confirmed as well. Cole grunted, and Nya was silent, but Jay knew that she was just thinking of a way to get him out of here. Probably. Hopefully.

There had to be something he could do. His brain was racing a mile a minute as he looked around the cockpit for anything that he could use to pry open the canopy, or even something to help him start to free his leg. Adrenaline poured through his veins, dulling any pain radiating from the wound and making him shake with repressed stims. Finally he tore off a control panel on the side, steadying his hands long enough to start fiddling with the wires. Maybe he could get his jet’s cloaking ability to start working; that would buy him some time until Nya got there.

It only took a minute for the wires to start sparking, small arcs racing up his fingers and Jay quickly dropped said wires, but the damage was already done. The tips of his fingers were slightly singed, as Cole would so gracefully put it, and Jay quickly put them into his mouth one by one to soothe the burns. Hopefully someone was still on the line, he thought as he pressed the button to open the comm channel, his finger throbbing in protest.

“Uh, team?” Jay said, flinching when one of the planes flew a little too close for his liking, “I can’t activate the cloaking thing and I think I burnt my fingers.”

“Seriously?” Cole said angrily, and Jay’s heart dropped at his tone. “Don’t worry, Jay, Nya and I are almost there?”

“Can you turn your ‘almost here’ into actually being here, please?”

“Working on it, Blue,” Nya grunted, and Jay could hear the sounds of crabs hitting her windshield with dull thunks. “Hang in there, you’re doing great. How’s that injury looking?”

“Let me check,” Jay leaned down to look again and nearly lost his lunch for the fourth time since he had gotten stuck in this predicament. Nothing had changed, but it suddenly looked a lot more red than it did before. His boot squelched on the floorplates, and something was soaking into it and through his socks. Dizzy, Jay realized that he was sole-deep in a puddle of crimson red, of his own blood.

That…wasn’t very comforting. “There’s a lot of blood.”

“How much blood?” Nya asked.

Jay swallowed thickly, pressing the back of his head to his seat and shutting his eyes. “T-There’s a puddle, and it’s soaking into my shoes.”

An explosion, and Nya’s voice came over the speakers again. “These guys are not making it easy. Is there any way that you can staunch it? Or pull the thing out?”

It warmed his heart that in literally any other situation Nya would be flipping her shit, but she was keeping her cool; Jay liked to think that it was because of him rather than anything else. “I can’t move it. The pylon is attached to the main engine and I’m not nearly strong enough. Plus, this thing is already falling apart; I don’t know what’ll happen if I move too much.”

Case in point, the loud whine of falling metal as a section collapsed behind him, making Jay jump in surprise and stare with wide eyes. “You guys might wanna hurry, I don’t know how much longer this is going to stay up!”

“Going as fast as we can,” Cole assured, and Jay could tell that his best friend was starting to grow frustrated with the situation. He slumped in his chair, trying in vain to keep his anxiety at bay as the planes flew closer and closer. Rationally, he knew that Cole wasn’t mad at him, per se, but it sure as hell felt like it. Honestly, It was a miracle that he hadn’t been spotted yet.

He should’ve never thought about it.

Screaming through the air as they descended, Jay watched as the planes focused on his location with a plummeting heart. Their crab cannons swiveled to face him, and Jay was suddenly very aware of just how cracked his canopy was and the fragility of the cockpit protecting him. It wouldn’t last for very long at all.

“Lloyd!” he yelled, throwing his arms up and over his head as the crabs started raining down on top of him. “I’m in trouble here!”

“On my way!” and Jay saw the green dragon mech zigzag across the sky, tearing through the planes with its mechanical claws and firing missle after missle. “Guys, does anyone have eyes on Garmadon? I can’t see him from here.”

“I do,” Kai ground out, and Jay could tell that the fire ninja was not happy. “He’s on the south side, I’m gonna need all hands on deck to take care of him. He’s got a new barracuda mech? I think?”

“Zane, get to Kai,” Lloyd said, and for First Master’s sake they had to stop sending Jay on these emotional rollercoastsers. He could not function under these conditions! “I’m right behind you.”

“Wait!” Jay exclaimed, because even though there may have been no more planes attacking, there were definitely people on the ground that would be trying to make their way towards him. For the first time he noticed that his weapon was gone; it must’ve gotten lost as he went down. “I don’t have anything to defend myself with, you know! They find me up here and I’m fucked!”

“You’re fucked anyway if we don’t defeat Garmadon,” Kai said harshly, and Jay flinched even though no one could see him. “Cole and Nya are almost there.”

“About that,” Cole said, and for the sake of the First Master could they please stop delivering bad news?! “I’m a bit stuck too.”

“Stuck? How are you stuck?” Nya asked, concerned. “Do I need to go back-”

“No, get to Jay,” Cole insisted, flicking a few switches near the mic and slapping a new record into his turntable. “I can handle it. I’m with you, girl, so lead the way.”

Jay knew that above all else, he trusted his best friend with his life; if he said he was with someone, Cole was going with them. Sighing in relief, the adrenaline finally started to fizzle out, and Jay sobbed as the pain started to set in again. It was blinding; the pool of blood had risen to his ankle and Jay was starting to feel the effects. Woozy, he tried to open up the comm channel, forgetting that he never closed it.

“Please hurry,” he slurred, and the fire racing up his leg made him yelp in pain. Vision blurred with tears, Jay let his head rest against his seat again, shutting his eyes and hoping that the world would stop spinning.

Until a shadow was finally cast over him. He cracked his eyes open, smiling at the sight of the battered water strider mech, the love of his life (even if she didn’t know it yet) giving him the world’s brightest grin as she grabbed her spear and saluted him. “You called, Blue?”

“I did,” he said softly, a chuckle bubbling out of him despite the grimness of his situation, “and they couldn’t have gotten anyone more gorgeous to answer it.”

Later, he would blame the flirting on the blood loss, but only he knew how much of a lie that really was.

[bloody-bee-tea]

IntiMarch 2024 Day 15 - Snark me better

The prompt for this was "Is this your first time?"

Suguru’s hands shake as he slides the lock on the bathroom stall into place. His legs feel like jelly, his body is heavy and he feels hot and cold all over. Suguru curses under his breath.

That fucker Kenjaku must have put something into his drink when he wasn’t looking.

“Suguru!” Kenjaku’s cheerful voice rings out and Suguru feels sick just hearing it.

It’s good he fled to a toilet, he’s probably going to throw up in no time.

“Suguru, what are you doing? Come back out there,” Kenjaku cajoles him, but Suguru doesn’t move a muscle.

Isn’t even sure he could, at the moment, even if he wanted.

“Go fuck yourself,” Suguru growls out and rage curls in his stomach when Kenjaku only laughs.

“I’d much rather fuck you,” Kenjaku gives back and there it is again, that sick feeling. “You know,” Kenjaku says, almost conversationally, “your friends all left already. What are you going to do? Stay in there until they kick you out? I’m patient, you know.”

It makes a shudder run down Suguru’s back and he realises that his situation is not looking all that great. He’s trapped in a sketchy club, in a skivvy bathroom, with nowhere to go and a literal creep waiting for him.

He really should have just stayed home tonight.

Suguru doesn’t deign to give Kenjaku an answer and instead leans his head against the wall. Kenjaku will have to leave the bathroom eventually and if Suguru can manage to get his limbs back under control he can easily outrun him.

Or knock him unconscious. Suguru would be fine with both.

But right now he still feels unstable, his limbs way too uncoordinated to even get the door back open and Suguru wearily closes his eyes.

When someone else comes into the bathroom, he jerks back up, and briefly wonders just how much time he lost, but when he manages to take his phone out with clumsy fingers, he sees that it hasn’t even been ten minutes.

Kenjaku will still be there, then.

Suguru sighs out, his eyes darting over the walls of the bathroom stall, taking in all the horrendous smearings that are everywhere.

His eyes get caught on something fairly legible and Suguru stills. The text simply says ‘Call me’ with a number noted down underneath and even drugged half out of his mind, Suguru knows that this is such a bad idea, but what else is he going to do?

It’s at least worth a try and in the worst case it will give him something to do for a few minutes. A few minutes where he doesn’t have to think about Kenjaku and what might be waiting for him should he go out there.

So Suguru dials the number and presses the phone to his ear. He’s weak enough that he has to prop his elbow on his leg, slumping forward in an almost uncomfortable position, and lean his head against the wall, so the phone won’t fall down.

It rings for so long that Suguru thinks nothing is going to happen, but then there’s a click on the other end of the line.

“What?” a voice drawls out, slurred with sleep and Suguru lets out a harsh breath, tears suddenly pricking his eyes.

“I need you to pick me up,” he says, even though he knows just how insane it is to say that to a complete stranger.

“Huh?” the voice gives back though Suguru can tell that the guy is gradually getting more awake by the second. “Who are you?”

“Suguru,” Suguru replies and he can basically hear the frown over the line.

“I don’t know a Suguru,” the guy says and Suguru chuckles.

“I suppose not. Your number is in a bathroom stall.”

There’s a brief silence on the other end.

“That fucker really did it,” the guy then mutters and Suguru closes his eyes.

He has a nice voice, he finds himself thinking and it’s not good that his thoughts are drifting like this. He needs to concentrate.

“Hey, you said you needed me to pick you up? Where are you? What’s going on? You don’t sound so good, you know?”

“Yeah, duh,” Suguru whispers out and just then someone enters the bathroom, the heavy beat of the music filtering in for a moment.

“What? Got shitfaced and now can’t live with the consequences?” the guy asks and he sounds mean about it.

Suguru likes it, even though he still feels like shit.

“Someone drugged me,” he answers. “He’s still waiting here.”

“Someone drugged you?” the guy calls out and he sounds outraged. “Where are you?”

“Why, you coming to get me out of here?” Suguru almost sounds hopeful, but he can’t help it.

Kenjaku might try shit with him, but he would never if someone else is there, if someone else pays attention. He’s a sketchy little fucker, adamant to stay in the shadows as much as possible and Suguru curses the day he was ever nice to that guy.

“Yeah, I am,” is the answer he gets before some rustling can be heard. “My name’s Satoru, by the way.”

“Nice to meet you,” Suguru weakly gives back and swallows back against a wave of nausea. “Sorry to bother you like this.”

“You’re way too polite for the situation you’re in,” Satoru grumbles. “So tell me, Suguru, where am I going?”

Suguru tells him the name of the club and Satoru huffs.

“Sweet, that’s not even two blocks, I can totally walk that, no need to wake up my driver.”

“Ehm,” Suguru says, not really knowing what to make of that now, but he can most definitely not walk that. “I’m kind of indisposed. Can barely stand, let alone walk.”

“No worries, I’ll drag you home without problems,” Satoru promises him and Suguru hears keys chime.

“I’m kind of big,” Suguru admits, because his stature is nothing to scoff at and yet Satoru only laughs.

“I’m over 6'3″, I think we’ll be fine,” Satoru flippantly gives back and Suguru silently raises an eyebrow.

It is kind of tall, but that’s really not all they need.

“I’m around the same but—”

“Great. Listen, you wanna stay on the phone? Is that creep still there?”

“He said he’d be waiting for me to eventually come out of here, so I’d guess yes.”

“Oh, great, I hope he tries shit when we leave. I haven’t punched anyone in the face in so long,” Satoru gleefully says and Suguru briefly wonders just what the hell he’s getting himself into.

“I’m kind of tired,” Suguru slurs out, exhaustion hitting him like a brick and Satoru hums.

“Men’s bathroom?” he asks and Suguru makes a noise that hopefully means affirmation. “I got you. You go sleep for a while,” he tells Suguru and the words barely left his mouth before everything around Suguru goes dark.

He comes to with a start when someone knocks at the stall door.

“Yo, Suguru, you in there?” Satoru’s voice calls out and Suguru slumps with relief.

“How the hell did you get in here?” he asks, because there is no way that Satoru just walked past the bouncers out front. “I’ll pay you back.”

“Don’t be stupid now, no one can resist my charm,” Satoru replies. “Except you maybe, because the door is still not open.”

“Gimme a moment,” Suguru pleads, because coordination is hard and his head is pounding now.

He fumbles the lock twice and then almost faceplants into the door when he tries to pull it open and by the end he’s sitting on the ground, sweat-soaked and exhausted.

“There you are,” Satoru says and the most gangly creature Suguru has ever laid eyes on squats down in front of him.

“You’re lanky as hell,” is the first thing Suguru says to him and watches how Satoru’s eyes sparkle as he laughs.

Surely that must be a trick of the light.

“Strong, too, you’ll see, my muscles keep all this lanky-ness together,” he promises. “You ready to leave this place or what?”

“Did you—see a creep with a scar across his forehead?”

“The guy who drugged you? Sorry, I didn’t really pay attention to anyone, but seriously, don’t sweat it. If he does something I’ll punch him, no problem.”

“You’re kind of insane,” Suguru mutters but he does try to drag himself to his feet.

“Kinda have to be to pick up random strangers in filthy bathroom stalls, no matter if they’re hot,” Satoru cheerfully says and reaches out, sliding his arms around Suguru and simply yanking him up. “You good?”

“That’s kinda hot,” Suguru admits, because he’s by no means a small man but Satoru made that move seem effortless.

“I know, right.” Satoru smiles as he says it and when he winks at Suguru, he thinks he might have laughed but his head hurts like hell and he actually just wants to get out of here.

“I’m so ready to leave this place now,” he says, repeating Satoru’s earlier words and Satoru only grins at him before he slings one of Suguru’s arms over his shoulders, one sliding behind his back and then he marches them right out of the club.

Moving is hard, and Suguru is too busy to try and at least keep up with Satoru’s long strides, so he doesn’t get a chance to look around and see if Kenjaku is really still around and waiting for him or if it was just an empty threat.

Suguru isn’t sure how they make it to Satoru’s place but he is certain that most of it is thanks to Satoru. There’s no way Suguru would have managed three steps on his own.

“And here we are,” Satoru finally says, not even sounding slightly out of breath as he deposits Suguru on a comfortable couch.

“You really did it,” Suguru mutters, quickly fading now that there’s no danger lurking around anymore and he longs to simply fall back, into the comfort of the couch and not have to think for a while.

“Told you I would,” Satoru says with a shrug. “I’ll go get a blanket for you and some painkillers for tomorrow, but don’t stress yourself, just pass out like you so clearly want to.”

“Promise to be better company tomorrow,” Suguru mumbles, barely audible, and the last thing he knows is Satoru patting his head and saying “I’m counting on it.”

And then there’s only blissful darkness.

~*~*~

Suguru wakes up to the smell of coffee. It’s the only pleasant thing that morning, because his head feels as if it’s being split open and there’s a strange taste in his mouth. Suguru lets out a deep groan. It doesn’t help with the headache.

“Morning, princess,” a cheerful voice calls out and Suguru forces himself to blink at least one eye open.

When he sees a mop of white hair, sparkling blue eyes and pure lanky-ness in front of him, it all comes back in a rush.

“Fuck, Satoru.”

“Always an option,” Satoru blithely says as he squats down next to the couch. “How are you feeling?”

“Like shit,” Suguru honestly gives back and then gives Satoru a grateful smile when he holds out the painkillers for him.

He quickly washes them down and then falls back into the couch.

“Let that sit for a while. You want pancakes or waffles for breakfast?”

“How are those my only options?” he groans out but when Satoru only shrugs he gives in. “Waffles, please.”

“Will do. Join me when you feel like you can move again,” Satoru says, already marching off towards what Suguru assumes must be the direction of the kitchen.

“You got coffee for me?” he calls after him but Satoru doesn’t even stop.

“If you can make it into the kitchen, sure,” he easily says and then vanishes through a doorway.

“Asshole,” Suguru grumbles under his breath, though he’s not really mad.

This is all rather—comfortable, if he’s being honest, apart from the splitting headache and the shit that happened last night.

Suguru stays on the couch for a while longer, but soon the smell of waffles joins that of the coffee and that’s enough to get him moving. Fuck painkillers. They’ll do their job eventually.

“Oh, look who made it!” Satoru greets him and immediately puts a pot of coffee and a stack of waffles down in front of him. “I have sugar and milk and every syrup you can think of but you strike me like the kind of guy who prefers it black.”

“Not true, caramel, please,” Suguru gives back because overdosing on sugar this fine morning seems like a good idea.

He deserves it after last night, anyway.

“Wow, a man after my own heart.” Satoru dramatically swoons before he quickly gets the syrup and then they fall into comfortable silence as Suguru demolishes his waffles.

It does wonders for his stomach and his head and his general mood.

“These are amazing,” he says between bites, because they are but Satoru only smirks at him.

“I know,” he replies and then leans closer to Suguru. “So. Is there anything you want me to do to that creep of yours? The options are varied and I’m willing.”

“Huh?” Suguru asks, still chewing his last bite because surely Satoru cannot be serious.

“I’m very intolerant when it comes to drugging people—and everything that usually comes after—so I’m offering my services.”

“What the hell could you even do?” Suguru wants to know, not because he’s seriously considering it, but because Satoru sounds so sure about himself.

“I’m very smart, very bored, very rich, and come from a very influential family. Just say the word. I can get him fired, evicted or arrested for some made-up bullshit. I can also just go and punch him in the face, if that’s more to your liking.”

“Very humble, too,” Suguru mutters but then he allows himself to imagine it for a moment. Satoru proved last night that he’s strong; strong enough to carry Suguru two blocks, even though Suguru is more muscle than anything else. But it would put Satoru on Kenjaku’s radar and he’s not going to risk that.

“Nah, the punching is out, I don’t want you near him. Who knows what he’d do in retaliation.”

“Aww, you’re worried, how sweet,” Satoru says, smiling brightly. “But with that option out—any of the others catch your attention?”

“I—kinda like the idea of having him fired,” Suguru admits. “Or evicted.”

“Make that an ‘and’,” Satoru nods, as if it’s already decided. “I can totally do that.”

“You seem awfully comfortable with this. Is this your first time?” Suguru wants to know and decides that the tingly feeling in his chest has nothing to do with the way Satoru smiles at him.

“Picking up hot guys in bathroom stalls? Yeah. That’s a first for me.”

“Could have fooled me,” Suguru mutters under his breath and Satoru reaches out to pat his hand.

“No worries, you’re very special that way.”

Suguru might still feel like shit and Kenjaku might still be out there, but right now things are somewhat good and Suguru decides to take a chance.

Satoru is just his type after all. Snarky and hot and strong enough to hold his own.

“Special enough to be allowed to save your number and see you again?” he asks, taking a sip of his coffee in an attempt to hide his blush.

“See me again? You’re thinking about leaving already? Shame, I kinda wasn’t done with you,” Satoru almost purrs out and Suguru refuses to admit how hot that is.

“Oh? Tell me more about those plans of yours then,” Suguru demands and leans forward, putting his cup of coffee down.

“First of all, you’re going to shower,” Satoru starts off. “Coming out with my clothes, of course.”

“Possessive, I see.”

“Then you’re going to trash talk the most atrocious movie I can find with me, before you let me drive you home, so you can change into real clothes and I can take you out for lunch.”

“Not dinner? You wound me so.”

“I’m not really good at planning that far ahead,” Satoru shrugs. “We’ll have to make new plans during lunch. I’m sure we can think of something.”

“Oh, I’m absolutely certain about that,” Suguru agrees and he marvels at how easy things with Satoru are.

It’s almost as if they have done this a thousand times already.

“I’m picking the place for lunch, though, because I know a restaurant that makes the best tiramisu. You’ll like it.”

“That’s bribery,” Satoru immediately says. “And not necessary, because I’m already interested. In case that wasn’t clear.”

“Yeah, no, I picked up on that,” Suguru says with a laugh. “Now. The shower?”

Satoru pouts at him when he gets up.

“What?” Suguru asks, though he can guess.

His fingertips tingle with anticipation.

“I valiantly come to your rescue in the middle of the night, take you away from bad, no good people, give you shelter and then feed you and I don’t even get something in return?”

He dramatically blinks at Suguru who thoughtfully hums under his breath.

“Mh, I mean—I can get you a plant as thanks, if you really want.”

“Suguru!”

Suguru laughs.

“Or I can do this, I guess,” he goes on and leans down to kiss Satoru.

He keeps it short and firm and by the time Satoru blinks his eyes back open, he’s almost to what he guesses is the bathroom.

“I expect a change of clothes to be ready when I’m done,” he calls over his shoulder and he hears Satoru make an annoyed sound.

“I charge a kiss per piece,” he calls back and now that makes Suguru stop, just in the doorway, turning around to give his most flirty smile at Satoru.

“Better dress me properly then,” he says and then firmly shuts the door behind him.

This is going to be fun.

[joanofexys]

can you talk about any of ur ocs more??? :)) I love hearing about them ♡

oc time!!! again

Florian and Ilya time??? Florian and Ilya time

like I’ve mentioned before Flor and Ilya really butt heads in the beginning. Florian was a Raven and Ilya has not had good experiences with them at all. On top of that, Flor has an attitude intended to cover up his many issues and Ilya, while an absolute sweetheart, can dish it just as well as he can take it

it takes them a hot minute to get along and it’s largely because Jude gets sick of Mara and Ilya being at each other’s throats and begs Florian to play mediator cause he’s snarky but he’s nowhere near Mara’s level. They end up with an odd sort of truce. They have each other’s backs but they’re not really friends

The first big thing for them is when Mara decides that she’s done with the ravens partner system. She and Florian have been intensely codependent and while Mara’s reached a point in therapy where she’s ready to try and let it go, Florian’s really not. He spirals without the partner system. Emiko can’t take that spot. It’d be too unhealthy for her. She’s largely ditched the partner system but still spends majority of her time around people and keeping an eye on Mara and Florian. Jude adores Florian but he does think he’d go crazy being attached at the hip to the kid. Essentially, that leaves Ilya. Who is a mostly willing participant cause I swear he really is a little sweetheart.

Suddenly they’re attached at the hip fucking everywhere. Flor’s press duty isn’t with Mara anymore, it’s always Ilya. Ilya gets a little too far and Flor’s losing focus on whatever he’s doing to look for him and make he’s still within sight.

I don’t have them developed in the same way I have Merr and Jude just because it’s kind of hard for me to pinpoint when exactly Ilya and Florian get together but it’s still fun to think about.

Florian’s generally pretty affectionate regarding physical touch (regarding people who are willing to give it at least. he’ll rarely ever ask but he enjoys it) and so he and Ilya ended up touching a lot of the time. A brush of the hands, an arm around his waist, holding hands for a split second. It’s not uncommon to see them just pressed against each other, seeming to be literally attached at the hip.

I think when they get together there’s never really a label put on it. They spend so much time together that things just start happening. Suddenly they’re cuddling, then they’re holding hands, when Ilya asks if he can kiss him it just feels natural to say yes. They don’t define what they are but they know it’s exclusive and they’re not seeing other people and they also know it’s private. And for awhile they do a good job at keeping it from their teammates because to everyone else that’s just how they act. They keep it from the press even longer because their dynamic changes completely once they’re in front of a camera. Banter and insults and jabs about their performance on the court. People think they have some weird rivalry going on that carried over from their time playing collegiate exy against each other. It’s all in good fun for them though. They still snark at each other and bicker off camera too, but the difference is that’s the only part the camera sees of them.

I’ve mentioned before that eventually they end up on rival teams, when Florian’s eventually willing to let go of the partner system a lot, and it really fuels the idea that they hate each other. The two of them kind of get a kick out of it. Cause at first it’s not like they were even close to being friends so maybe once upon a time the media’s perception of them was closer to the truth but now it’s the furthest thing from it.

Ummmmm I’m trying to think of anything else I want to hit on but truly this has been sitting in my drafts for so long and I know I need to just post it soon. I’m so sorry, anon. Istg I wasn’t just ignoring you. So yeah this is very incomplete, nowhere near Merr and Jude level explanation, and maybe I’ll give a proper explanation of these two at some point. In the meantime this just needs to get posted because I’ve let it sit for like a week and I feel mean now

[hairstevington]

Freaky Friday (Steddie's Version) - chapter 3!

Eddie Munson x Steve Harrington

Summary: Steve goes to Hawkins High as Eddie, and Eddie goes to Family Video as Steve. Neither really goes as planned. Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Link to Ao3

Word Count: 3.8K, more chapters to come

Warnings: Enemies to lovers, slow burn, canon universe (more or less) set before season 4, me adding in lore than the show didn't touch on such as Eddie/Steve interactions pre-season 4, body swap, they are idiots, ANGST, revenge (attempted), POV switching

A/N: This is becoming one of my fav fics to write! Thanks to all who are following along and supporting me on Ao3! If any of you were on the Tumblr taglist then moved to Ao3, feel free to let me know. This goes for anybody who ever wants to be removed from the taglist lol, no hard feelings!

Steve woke up to the sound of an alarm at 6am on Friday morning. He couldn’t remember why at first, and reached over to hit the snooze button. When it went off again at 6:15, he groaned and rolled over to unplug the damn thing. 

The previous night came back to him in a flash when he reached out a hand that didn’t belong to him. Oh. Right.

For a moment as he desperately clung to consciousness, he thought that the worst part of all of this might be having to wake up so early. Well, that and the crippling fear of what Eddie was going to do. 

He got out of bed and looked at himself in the mirror. Yup. I’m still Munson. He fixed Eddie’s frizzy hair to the best of his ability, and wondered how it would look if he actually used the right products on it. He put on an outfit that mildly resembled Eddie’s usual style. Steve hoped that if he followed the rules and didn’t stir up trouble, Eddie would do the same. 

He didn’t have a backpack or books or anything, but it didn’t really matter. Eddie never seemed to bring anything around school except his stupid black lunchbox. 

He laughed to himself at the thought of that big, clunky thing Eddie carried around. Steve had seen the inside contents firsthand, and he was always shocked at how cavalier Eddie was about carrying drugs around with him all day. Like, the dude just took a whole lot of weed everywhere he went, sold it right outside of school property, and nobody really questioned it.

Most of the time, anyway. As Steve walked downstairs and grabbed a protein bar on his way out the door, he thought about the one time he’d been involved in Eddie’s dealing. Steve’s Junior year, not too long before he started seeing Nancy. Eddie’s Senior year - the first one, anyway.

“Where’s Tommy?” Eddie had asked when they met up at the picnic table. “He’s usually the one that meets me here.”

“Tommy’s out sick,” Steve responded. “You’re stuck with me today.” Eddie sighed as he sat down, putting the infamous giant metal lunchbox on the table and opening it to reveal quite literally the most marijuana Steve had ever seen in one place. His eyes went wide. “Jesus Christ, man. That’s, like -”

“Whaddya want, Harrington?” Eddie asked, his smile pained but pleasant. “Pick your poison.”

“Just give me whatever Tommy usually gets,” Steve answered. Eddie nodded and dug through his contraband as Steve took out a few bills and threw them on the table. Eddie caught a glimpse of the money and smirked. Steve had expected Eddie to give him change, but it was pretty evident that would not be happening the moment they’d started this interaction. “You’re being careful, right?”

“What the hell are you on about?” Eddie asked as he handed Steve the bag. 

“I just mean, like. With selling. Couldn’t you go to jail or something?”

“Why the hell do you care?” he replied, growing agitated. “People don’t tell on me because if they did, they wouldn’t have anywhere else to buy this shit. So unless you’re going to run to the police, I think I’ll be okay.”

“Jesus, man. I’m just looking out for you,” Steve responded as he stood up. 

“Since fucking when?” Eddie retorted. “You’ve never cared before.”

“I never bought from you before,” Steve replied. Eddie’s harsh words and combative nature hardly fazed Steve. It wasn’t too far off from how Tommy talked to him, and he’d gotten used to that years ago. 

“I know what I’m doing,” Eddie insisted. “Rick and my dad have taught me well regarding the life of crime.” Steve responded without thinking - a habit that he was still trying to break. 

“Isn’t your dad, like, in prison, though?” He regretted it as soon as he’d said it. He wished he could chase the words in the air and crush them, but they were already out and into the ether. 

“We’re done here,” Eddie responded. He sounded tired and disappointed as opposed to angry. That was far worse.

So, Steve got what he needed and he left. Usually, that’s the full extent of what happens during a drug deal, but unfortunately Steve wasn’t so lucky that time. 

He was taken out of his memory when the fresh air hit his face and went into his lungs. He really, really wanted a cigarette. He climbed into his car and for a moment wished it were Eddie’s, because there certainly would have been something to smoke in there. Steve’s car, however, was kept neat and drug-free. It was part of the agreement he had with his father about paying his car insurance. If Mr. Harrington caught so much as a hint of smoke in the car he’d so nicely provided his son, Steve lost all car privileges. And if Steve didn’t have a car, he pretty much didn’t have a life. 

He had many reasons to quit smoking, and he’d finally gotten over the horrible cravings, and now here he was, fighting them yet again. 

Fuck you, Munson.

He didn’t realize how weird it would feel to pull into the Hawkins High parking lot. Only a year prior was he in this parking lot with Nancy, thinking about college essays and graduation. 

Seemed like forever ago. Steve hardly felt like the same person he was then. 

Although, at the current moment, he was literally a different person, but that’s another story. 

He sighed and headed into the school. It was still pretty early, but kids roamed the halls anyway. Steve stopped one of them - he didn’t recognize her, but she looked kind enough. 

“Hey, so uh -” Her eyes widened at him in confusion with a hint of fear. At first he assumed it must have been the height difference. “If I needed another copy of my schedule, where would I go?”

“You don’t know your schedule yet?” she asked, still hesitant. “Did your brain finally melt from all the drugs?” Steve raised his eyebrows, shocked at the way she had casually insulted him. 

“No, I just -” Steve paused. He had no other explanation for why he’d need a new schedule, so he let it go. “Do you know where I should go, or not?”

“Main office, bonehead.” She spun around and walked away, leaving Steve stunned. 

Okay, so she wasn’t so kind after all. Steve was kind of shit at reading people.

He managed to get a copy of Eddie’s schedule (the woman at the front desk seemed equally as judgmental and suspicious, so Steve lied and said it was to give to his girlfriend. She didn’t seem to believe that either), and then headed to his first class before the bell rang. So far so good, he figured. 

But then class started, and Steve remembered how much he hated school. He sat and pretended to listen to the teacher until the forty minutes were up. 

There was a quiz in math next period, but thankfully Steve actually knew what he was doing. Math was something he understood relatively well. It was easier for him than the other subjects, at least. Plus, since he’d started hanging out with Dustin, he’d gotten a lot more booksmart just through, like, osmosis or something. For example, he knew the word osmosis.

Nobody really talked to him in class, but maybe that was for the best. Steve wasn’t really much of an actor, and he didn’t know Eddie well enough to accurately impersonate him. Plus, when people did interact with him, they were usually just calling him a freak or whatever, even though Steve wasn’t doing anything. People shit on Eddie just for existing.

The day went by swiftly and with relatively little issue - that was, until lunch. 

At least Steve knew Eddie enough to remember where he sat - the Hellfire table, with the other freaks. Eddie was walking on tables and making a scene like twice a week, talking about the same shit over and over to his little sheep who always listened intently to his ramblings. 

Steve always wondered why the people at the table seemed to encourage his behavior. Mostly they ignored it, but there were always a few who seemed impressed. The young kids. 

Steve couldn’t believe Dustin had become one of the sheep. 

He loved Dustin, obviously. He’d do anything for Dustin, and yet - Dustin was in a new phase of his life. High school. Damn. Those were prime identity years for Steve. He wasn’t sure how much Dustin would change, or which clique he’d be adopted into. When he heard that Hellfire had adopted him after Day 1, Steve was kind of disappointed, just because he never saw the appeal of that club or the people in it. Especially Eddie. 

And now, Eddie was leaving his own mark on Dustin, and Steve couldn’t do anything about it but watch from afar. 

Until now, he guessed. 

Steve went to the Hellfire table and sat down at the head of it - that’s where Eddie always sat. Various people were gathered around already, most of whom he didn’t recognize. Mike was there, but they didn’t really look at each other. He still didn’t like Steve that much, but he was a kid - Steve didn’t take it too personally. Dustin joined them a few minutes later, actively avoiding eye contact as well. That was far more personal, and Steve wasn’t gonna stand by and let it happen. 

“Dustin, you doing alright, man?” he asked. Dustin looked over at Steve (Eddie) and nodded.

“Yeah,” he responded. He seemed…embarrassed? “I’m sorry for yelling at you guys yesterday.”

Oh. So Dustin wasn’t angry at him anymore, he was angry at himself. Does he know Eddie and I went back to the plant yet??

“It’s all good, I get it. I’m sorry, too.”

“For what?” Dustin asked, confused. 

“For, uh - overstepping, I guess,” Steve answered. 

“Munson, did you just apologize for something?” another person at the table asked. Steve turned to see someone he thought he knew, but couldn't place his name. “This is a first.”

Shit. Wait, does Eddie really never apologize? Figures -

“He’s always had a soft spot for Henderson,” another student added. 

“You weren’t overstepping, Eddie,” Dustin continued, ignoring the comments from the others. “I just wanted -”

“We don’t have to harp on it,” Steve interrupted. Hey, at least I’m crushing the thing Eddie does where he never lets people finish a thought. “Let’s just forget it.”

“Thanks,” Dustin said. “And it seems like you survived the night despite having to be civil with Steve for ten minutes.” Yeah, ten minutes. If only.

“I wasn’t sure for a minute there, but yeah. We made it through.”

Steve kept to himself the rest of lunch, occasionally chatting with Dustin or Gareth - that was the one dude’s name. Apparently, there was band practice on Saturday. Steve had no idea Corroded Coffin was still together. 

He thought he was doing alright, all things considered. He almost believed he’d make it through the whole day undetected. 

How foolish of him. 

___________________________________

Dustin was first clued in that something was wrong when he heard that Eddie had showed up in a car other than his infamous van. Since Dustin was always one to ride the curiosity voyage, he’d gone out to the parking lot between periods to see for himself. 

Eddie’s van wasn’t there. A totally different, unrecognizable car was parked in his place. That was weird in itself - Eddie always took that spot, and he didn’t have access to any other cars. Dustin shrugged and started walking back to the school, and that’s when he noticed something even weirder. 

Steve’s car. 

Dustin rationalized it as best as he could. Maybe Steve lent Robin the car, even though she didn’t have her license yet. Seemed improbable, but possible. Eddie could have stolen Steve’s car for the day. That one was more likely, but then why wasn't it in the right parking spot?

Lunch gave him even more information. 

Eddie was nice to Dustin, sure. But he wasn’t that nice. He still teased Dustin in a way that made him feel praised, somehow. Like - way to go, buddy. You’re a weirdo like me. And Gareth was right, Eddie never apologized. 

But Dustin knew someone who did. 

At lunch, Eddie didn’t seem to know anything about Dungeons and Dragons, and he was quiet. Like, way too quiet. Mike talked about Lucas joining the basketball team, and Eddie didn’t give his usual tirade about how sports teams are poisoning the school. Instead, he was supportive. He also didn’t remember that band practice was the next day, and Corroded Coffin had band practice every Saturday without fail. 

Dustin thought at first that maybe, Eddie had just been crazy high off something. Something that Dustin hadn’t seen him on before. In any case, there was definitely something he was keeping secret about the night prior with Steve. Dustin just had no idea what. 

The mystery continued to unfold right after the final bell of the day, when the stupid bullies approached Dustin yet again. He rolled his eyes at their arrival. 

“What now, you imbeciles?” Dustin asked, passively. He’d tried several ways to fight back in the past, and nothing really worked, but he knew that the best way to get a bully to lose interest is to pretend he didn’t care. 

“Look who’s all tough,” Chad grinned devilishly. “Are you waiting on your guardians to show up and save you again?” 

“What?” Dustin didn’t know how they knew about that. 

“Harrington and the Freak,” Chad answered. “They tried to give us a good scare last night.”

“They did?” Dustin asked, his heart sinking. 

“What, like you didn’t ask them to?”

“Actually, I specifically asked them not to,” Dustin sighed. Those idiots. Chad and his buddies circled around Dustin, trapping him against the wall with no escape in sight. One of them looked in the distance and rolled his eyes. 

“Speak of the devil,” he said. The group all turned towards his gaze to see Eddie strolling straight towards them, a somehow casual fury in his eyes. Eddie’s anger was usually a lot more intense and frazzled. This was more like a guy who’d had enough. A guy who’d seen some shit far worse than bullying and was now unfazed by high school drama.

Eddie approached the circle and wiggled his way in until he was face to face with Chad.

“What do you want, Munson?” he asked. 

“I told you. Leave the kid alone, or else,” he replied.

“Or else, what? Are you gonna curse me or something?” The group laughed. Everyone thought they were so smart, making the same jokes about Eddie. Angry, unhinged Eddie who Dustin had seen carefully and quietly work on campaigns on multiple occasions. He only acted crazy when he had an audience. 

“If that’s what it takes,” Eddie shrugged. “Or I could, you know, tell everyone about the time you threw up all over Stacy Williams at the New Years party.” Chad’s eyes widened. 

“How do you even know about that?” Eddie smirked, then continued. 

“Right place, right time I guess. I mean, I was at least in a better place than Stacy Williams that night -”

“Okay fine, I’ll leave him alone,” Chad said. Eddie let go of the guy and took a step back, triumphant. Chad recovered, then delivered one final, unoriginal blow. “Freak.” Spit flew out of his mouth as he said the word. Chad was the worst, and nobody liked him anyway. He walked off with his minions, pathetically defeated. 

“Sorry, Dustin. I know you didn’t want me to -”

“It’s okay. Thanks,” Dustin replied. “I think he might actually lay off now.”

“Cool,” his friend said with a smile. He turned to leave, but Dustin only let him get a step or two before calling out to him. 

Dustin had heard the story about Chad and Stacy before, and he knew who had told it to him. 

“Steve?”

“Yeah?” His friend turned back to Dustin nonchalantly, before his eyes widened. “Oh, shit.”

“I knew it. Tell me everything.”

______________________________________

Eddie slept in until noon, a luxury he usually didn’t have on Fridays. Well, he used to sleep in until noon on Fridays a lot, but then he didn’t graduate. 

This time, however, he could sleep guilt-free, knowing that Steve’s shift wasn’t until 12:30. With a full night’s rest under his belt, he felt a bit more at peace about the whole situation, somehow. 

Maybe it was because, out of the two of them, Eddie had a much better deal than Steve. 

He wondered how school was going, and if Steve had gotten a taste of his own medicine. Maybe having to experience constant bullying would make him understand how much of an asshole he’d been. One could only hope. 

Eddie climbed out of bed, chose the least offensive outfit he owned (plain black t-shirt and black jeans), put the green vest on (he far preferred his Dio one), and headed out the door. He hadn’t even looked in the mirror or anything. He avoided it on purpose. But, alas, he caught his reflection in the rearview mirror of his van as he backed out of Forest Hills, and that’s when he realized he’d left Steve’s hair a fucking mess. 

Seriously, not once had Steve’s hair ever looked like this. Eddie didn’t even know it could look like this. It was…really bad??? How much time did Steve invest in making this shit look good every day? What the hell??

Eddie started to realize why Steve had been so upset the night before about the conditioner thing. 

Even though it wasn’t his hair, technically, and any embarrassment Eddie faced today would have zero consequences, he took a minute to make it look somewhat decent. He wanted to screw Harrington over, of course, but he also wanted to see what a normal day was like for someone like Steve. 

He’d cause chaos in other ways, he promised himself. 

He pulled into Family Video, feeling relatively confident as he walked in. How hard could it be, right? It was just movies. Eddie watched a lot of movies. He’d make sure Steve kept his job - that was the deal. He didn’t want to keep up his end of the bargain, but he was scared of what Steve would do in retaliation. 

School and job must stay intact. Non-negotiable. But everything else was fair game. 

“You’re late, Harrington,” Keith said as Eddie walked in. He looked at his watch - it was 12:31.

“Barely,” he responded before regretting it. Fuck. I’m bad at this.

“Watch it,” Keith warned. Eddie quickly backed off and headed behind the counter. He wasn’t sure what else there was to do other than handle customers. He figured if Keith wanted him to do something else, he’d say something. 

Nobody came in for the first half hour. Eddie was bored. He thought about asking Keith if he could watch one of the movies, then shut that thought down before it left his lips. He wished he’d brought a book. How the hell did Harrington survive this job when it was so dull?? He wondered if having Robin around made it more bearable. She was due to show up after school around 3pm.

He felt a major reprieve when Keith asked him to put the returns back to their rightful spots on the shelves. It gave him something to do, and he was so excited to be doing something that he got it done in record-breaking time, apparently. 

“All set,” Eddie had said once he’d put the last tape on the shelf. Keith eyed him suspiciously. 

“Really?” he asked. Eddie nodded. “That was fast. Did you just put them all in random spots again?” Jesus Christ. I’m surprised Harrington hasn’t lost this job all by himself. 

“No, they’re all in the right place. You can check if you want.” Eddie knew they were all correct, because he’d been in this store so many damn times. He probably knew it better than Steve. No, he definitely knew it better than Steve. 

Keith double checked a few rows before he believed Eddie’s words. He nodded, clearly impressed. 

Then, a customer came in - someone he knew. Rick. 

“Hey, man!” Eddie greeted him without thinking about it. 

Rick, or “Reefer Rick,” was the guy that got Eddie into the whole dealing thing. He was Eddie’s supplier, and he was a good friend. Well, he was a friend anyway. 

“Hey…” Rick responded, confused at “Steve’s” enthusiasm. 

“Cheech and Chong, right?” Eddie asked, knowing that was Rick’s usual. “We just got it back so it’s actually right here.” Rick looked impressed that an employee remembered him, but Eddie knew for a fact he was a regular here, and his appearance was kind of hard to forget. 

He rang him out. He probably did it wrong on the computer, but whatever. 

“Have a good day, man,” Rick said as he left. 

A woman came in after that, looking for something to watch with her boyfriend. Eddie rambled on about a few titles, asking her about the boyfriend and what he liked, then what she liked, before providing multiple recommendations and his reasoning behind them. She chose one, rented it, and left the store. 

Damn. I’m actually really good at this shit. Eddie wondered if he’d found his calling. He deserved this job way more than Harrington. 

“Steve,” Keith called from the back room, where he’d been doing paperwork and rewinding tapes. “What’s gotten into you today?”

“What do you mean?” Eddie asked. 

“I mean,” Keith continued. “You’re staying busy instead of slacking off. You’re remembering customers, and you didn’t hit on that girl at all like you usually would. You even gave her a really good recommendation. I thought you didn’t know anything about Star Wars?” 

Seriously, how the hell has Harrington not been fired yet? Eddie also took note of Steve not knowing about Star Wars, which may have been his worst offense yet, in Eddie’s eyes. 

“Yeah, well. I’m really trying,” Eddie responded. He wasn’t, really. This job was stupid easy. But also, he was doing it, because that was the deal. 

“Keep up the good work,” Keith said. “If you do, I’ll start letting you pick your shifts.”

Eddie’s eyes widened. He loved praise. He loved being told he was doing well, it just didn’t happen much outside of Hellfire. 

“Noted. Thanks,” he replied. 

And then it hit him - Eddie had set out to ruin Steve’s life, and instead he got him a promotion. Fuck. I’m really bad at this whole revenge thing.

(next chapter)

______________________________________

@thegoatscoat @ao3screenshots @stevessluttywaist @tartarusfairy @croatoan-like-its-hot @mightbeasleep @ofherscarlettwitchways @paintballkid711 @abraca-fxckyou @allbimyself26 @jellybabiesforall @allbymyselfexceptformycactus @justaloadofgarbage-blog @alliemunsonsstuff @undreamingscatworld @thefruityfours @hobbitnarwhal @calivanus @wreckmyplans-thatsmyman @antheia @goodolefashionedloverboi @lillemilly @missmagillicuddy @steviesbicrisis @gamerdano @menamesniall @eyeslikewildflowers111 @callmesirkay@stringischeese @eds-trashmouth @mnl-enuh @redfreckledwolf @itsanarrum @soulsofstarsliveinyourveins @gregre369 @stevesbipanic @momotonescreaming @aryakanojiaa @wrenisflying @comicmadlover @lilacrobin @itch-my-b0nez @anonymousbandgirl @disastardly @Dang_Dirty_Demons @daisyellsong @val-from-lawrence

[flyingfishtailoutpost1]

I don’t wanna be a Bitchy Gardener but I have to rant for a sec and I apologize for all this but

I wish people could be goddamn normal about things for like a minute.

And by things I mean Things. Like fucking trees. And ducklings.

Was sitting in a waiting room with my daughter at the dentist surrounded by little kids, and a momma duck goes waddling by with a crowd of ducklings outside the window. Our town’s 50% canals, so they’re everywhere. All the little kids go nuts oohing at them, but the woman next to me makes this disgusted face and says, “Ugh, they crap on my driveway, I’m so sick of it, whenever I see a nest in my back yard I smash all the eggs.” My daughter and every other kid there who heard her were 😨😨😨😨 and she just went back to scrolling on her phone.

This happens to me ALL THE FUCKING TIME.

Iguanas are everywhere down here. They’re invasive. They’ll eat your garden. Yeah it’s a pain. They’re also silly as hell when they go running across the street. Anytime I’m driving with the kids and we see one booking it across the street, my son’s like “hey that’s a weird dog” and we all laugh because we can be NORMAL ABOUT THINGS. But I can’t say it to anyone else without getting a lecture on the fact that they’re INVASIVE and also BAD and EVIL because they’re ANNOYING. Suzy Izzard wanted to know “How do you have an evil herbivore?” Well, just annoy the hell of a south Florida suburbanite and poop on her driveway, I suppose.

I was working a Sierra Club event, doing talks about native plants and pollinators, and was having a discussion with someone else in the industry about the fact that iguanas don’t seem to want to eat natives. I said that’s a fab talking point for landscapers to get people to consider native landscaping and she shot me down because, she said, iguanas are so annoying we really can’t distract people away from killing them.

I mean, yes by all means we need population control, but in the meantime I have to worry about being shot when I’m on a clients property because people are taking their guns out after these things. I’ve literally walked into a clients yard and found him standing there with a rifle (NOT a pellet gun), trying to take pot shots at iguanas on his deck. I just turned around without a word and left, because I’ve said I’ll happily die with a watering can in my hand but I didn’t mean quite like that.

One of our neighbors had a pongam tree in their front yard, and it was GLORIOUS. It just looked like the platonic ideal of a tree. It was the thing fantasy tree nymph art is made of. I loved it. I mentioned to my boss once that it was beautiful, and got a ten minute lecture on the fact that it’s BAD. A BAD tree because it’s non-native. And also it robs 7-11s and mugs old ladies on the weekends I guess I don’t know it’s A FUCKING TREE. It cannot have morals. I KNOW it’s not native, it’s my job to know. But it’s pretty. It’s a pretty tree. I’m allowed to say “hey look at that pretty tree.”

Trees are morally neutral. Iguanas are morally neutral. DUCKLINGS are fucking morally neutral. They are not invasive specifically because they practice willful or premeditated malice.

But sure, I’ll stand on what used to be Everglades wetland, now drained and paved over for your gated community and listen to you whine about ducks pooping on your driveway. Sure.

You know who else is an invasive species? You are. Fucking bite me.

[dexter-doll]

Incorrect quotes from a generator

Ft my ocs

—————————————————

Alen West: The joy of hanging out with Cerena. You look away for 5 seconds to make sure something is set up correctly, and they bite the tip of a marker off.

—

Cerena Demon: I wish I was a cat, but not in a furry kinda way, more like a “I can sleep all day and hit people with no consequences” kinda way.

—

Cerena Demon: The risk I took was calculated but, man, am I bad at math.

—

Cerena Demon: Wow, it sure smells like wrong dog in here!

Alen West: Oh buddy...

Cerena Demon, already sobbing: ASK.

—

Alen West: I'm having problems with a guy...

Cerena Demon: Like his dead body won't fit into your trunk kind of problems, or you like him kind of problems?

—

Alen West: One time I went to hand Cerena a bowl of soup. I wanted to say “Careful, it’s hot!”, and “Here’s your soup!”, so instead I blurted out “Careful it’s soup.”

—

Cerena Demon: The ‘how the fucks’ and 'why are you so dumbs’ don’t matter. All that matters is that I have a new gun.

—

Alen West: Do you have any skeletons in your closet?

Shadow Cerena: Literally or figuratively?

Alen West: I have to specify?

—

Cerena Demon: That’s illegal, right?

Shadow Cerena: Why do you care? Are you a fucking cop?

Cerena Demon: No-

Shadow Cerena: Then shut the fuck up.

—

Alen West: Where are you going?

Shadow Cerena: Hell, eventually.

—

Shadow Cerena: Am I a boy? Am I a girl? It doesn't matter. I'm going to burn your house down.

—

*Cerena Demon is casually searching around the room*

Shadow Cerena: Hey Cerena, what’re you looking for?

Cerena Demon: My will to live.

*Alen West walks into the room*

Cerena Demon: Oh, there it is.

—

Alen West: You look mentally ill.

Cerena Demon: I am. Let’s go.

—

Shadow Cerena: :)

Cerena Demon: >:(

Shadow Cerena: Turn that frown upside down!

Cerena Demon: ):<

Shadow Cerena: Not sure what I was expecting...

—

Cerena Demon: You know, sometimes dandelions remind me of that shadow version of me.

Alen West: Aww, is it because they’re like a little sunshine, spreading light and hope everywhere?

Cerena Demon: What? Gross, no, it’s because they’re like a weed that you can’t get rid of!

—

Shadow Cerena: I baked you a pie!

Alen West: Really?! What flavor?

Shadow Cerena: *pulls gun out of the pie* DEATH!

—

Cerena Demon: So my therapist was talking to me and she said that I really just need to break down my walls and let people in.

Cerena Demon: So I’ve decided to break the fourth wall.

Cerena Demon: *looks at camera* Hi there. I use humor as a coping mechanism.

—

Alen West: I’m not so sure you’re stakeout material.

Cerena Demon: I’m a chronic insomniac, I was born for this.

—

Alen West: Though I admit I don’t know much about you, I am feeling pretty confident in my assessment that you are probably some sort of sick deadly fuck.

Shadow Cerena: Who told you my secret?

—

Cerena Demon: You disgust me.

Shadow Cerena: *eating a kitkat sideways* I realize this and don’t care.

—

Vic Demon: Do you want this handful of moss?

Cerena Demon: Why would I want a handful of fucking moss?

Vic Demon: Damn, you could’ve just said no.

—

Vic Demon, at Shadow Cerena’s funeral: I need a moment with them.

Everyone else at the funeral: Of course. *leaves*

Vic Demon, leaning over Shadow Cerena’s coffin: Okay, listen here you little shit. I know you’re using my brothers body and also not dead.

Shadow Cerena, sitting up in the coffin: Yeah, no shit.

—

Shadow Cerena: Thanks for not telling Alen West what happened.

Cerena Demon, dumbfounded: I wouldn’t even know where to begin trying to explain this.

—

Vic Demon: When's the last time you slept?

Cerena Demon: Uh... a few days ago, I think.

Vic Demon: A few- how many?!

Cerena Demon: Uh... *starts counting on fingers* I need more fingers...

Vic Demon: What you need is sleep!

—

Shadow Cerena: Anything else?

Cerena Demon: Yeah. Stay away from me!

Shadow Cerena: Alright. See you in the room we share.

—

That’s it for now

@crossover-enthusiast

[moon-ursidae]

it’s time for session #2!

THERE WILL BE SPOILERS FOR BOTH OF THE LAST OF US GAMES UNDER THE CUT!!!!

these notes are so scattered if you read them without context and i am SO SORRY lmao. i’m typing them so fast trying to keep up with my brain that’s going 700 mph and the game. ANYWAY, we’re getting a very late start tonight bc i was helping my friend learn guitar for a few hours haha

total play time: about 2 hrs and 40 min (there’s not much story progression here just exploring seattle!)

okay so we last left off with ellie and dina in the woods on horseback post joel’s house. i have not gotten farther than the woods bc i was super ultra mega tired. so let us continue!

okay sooooo this section is called the gate cool cool cool

this is fucking gorgeouuusssssss

omg dina listing off all the people that joel crossed

i’m sure there’s more before that bro

oh my god the LIGHTINGGGGG in the woods so so good

we’re so close to seattle i’m scared

so much happens here man

map acquired✅

CARD BABYYYYYY

jesus christ i L O V E the aesthetic of nature reclaiming land and man made structures. it’s sooooooo pretty

oh shit QZ!

i’m looking through ur journal ellie hope you don’t mind haha

dina seems to be sick? well. i know why but ellie doesn’t yet so shhhhhh

it’s so sad to me that every drawing of joel so far that ellie’s done, she hasn’t been able to draw his eyes. that was the last thing she saw of him while he was alive. like she wants to get them just right but everytime she draws it that means she has to look him in the eye again. and maybe she’s feeling too guilty to do that rn. ugh idk i know neil always does shit like that but maybe i’m reading too much into it haha. ANYWAY that is one of the most heartbreaking parts about her journal dude. UUUUGGHHHHH 😭

“i really love her.” 😭😭��😭 ELLIE TELL HER PLEASE

we just got a letter, wonder who it’s from🕺🏻

kieran?? kieran duffy??????

haha wrong game

also lemme just say, i fucking love dina

she’s so sweet and empathetic, but will cut the fuck out of a bitch when needed

I HAVE TO PARKOUR?? UP HIGH?? IN THE LAST OF US?? OVER A GATE??

this is some nathan drake shit bro where’s nolan north

FUUUUUCK I THOUGHT SHE WAS GONNA FALL BRO OH MY GOD

hoooooollllyyyyyy fuuuuuuck this is a big city jesus christ

LMAO her wobble before she fell down to the platform below

this game is so gorgeous. holy fuckin shit i’m gonna say that a lot huh?

THE SOUND DESIGN??? WHEN GOING DOWN THE LOOKOUT TOWER AT THE GATE OF THE QZ??? WHEN SHE FALLS AND IT ECHOES?? THAT SHIT WAS CRAZYYYY

guys i’m gonna be honest. i’m team brick.

i LOVE being able to break windows this is so fun

oh god i have a horrible memory plz don’t make me memorize these gate codes

side note: i love ellie’s hair here. i’m gonna have to try a lil half up half down situation

i saw someone on twitter point out that it looks a lot like tess’s hair🥺

“well, we believe in you” shimmer and dina? or baby and dina? hmmm things to consider

totally unrelated, but i can’t not hear ashley johnson going “babyyyyyyyyy” with an s.o. since the mighty nein reunion lmao

ellie seeing dina and going “babyyyyyyyy” like yasha LMAO

ANYWAY

fuck i hope i can pull out that page of codes dude

THANK GOD

oh shit another hotel

i’m traumatized after the last on dude you can’t make me go back

H O L Y. S H I T.

THIS IS SO OPEN I’M GONNA SPEND SOOOOOOOO MUCH TIME HERE

FUCK DUDE

this is fucking crazy

there’s so much small shit everywhere oh my fucking G O D

omg joel was definitely reading that space book for ellie she just talked about an early moon mission at this tank

DINA’S JOKE “she’s sounding a bit hoarse” they’re literally made for each other

OH MY GOD I JUST FOUND THE DR. UCKMANN CARD NO FUCKING SHOT

damn is this his way of addressing the crunch work hours at naughty dog?

“once a well respected researcher… questionable experiments in the realm of pushing human limits saw him ostracized from the scientific community… Laurent Foucault of SPARK Laboratories found his work dubious…”

the music is hauntingly beautiful in this area oh my god

OH MY GOD THE SCANNERS THAT DETECT THE VIRUS FROM THE BOSTON QZ IN THE FIRST GAME

i miss the first game LMAO even though i JUST finished that

THERE’S A FUCKING PEARL JAM POSTER IN THE MUSIC SHOP😭

IF I EVER WERE TO LOSE YOU, I’D SURELY LOSE MYSELF😭

i feel like this is supposed to be hank williams which would be fucking sick bc “alone and forsaken” and all that jazz haha

“guitars starting at $49.99” BRO SINCE WHEN I FUCKING WIIISH DUDE😭

as a drummer, i can confirm dina is a fucking natural

“i love you?” A H H H H H

ANUTHA CARD WOOO

Das Wort is my favorite card so far. he just like me fr

WAIT THIS IS THE TAKE ON ME SCENE

i will cry

SHE’S PLAYING FUTURE DAYS😭😭😭😭

BARRE CHORDS??? ellie i could literally never wtf

the chords are all accurate too holy fuck naughty dog

ashley has such a nice voice oh my god

i’m gonna fucking cry bc they put this in the hbo trailer

AAAAHHHHHHH😭😭

this is why i fucking love music dude. it transcends everything and always will. it’s the one thing that connects everyone. and it’s connecting people in this game too and i UGGHHH i love music holy fuck

the way dina looks at her🥹

and also knowing that joel was the one that showed her all of these songs and artists bc ellie wasn’t even alive to hear take on me and future days, and literally everything else. GOOOOODDDDDDDD😭😭

“you should have kissed me then.” “i wanted to.”

god i love dina and ellie they sound like an old married couple already

first dawn of the wolf poster i’ve seen!!! WOOOOO

i’m gonna come back to the nutrition distribution center bc i feel like that shit is gonna be bad news bears

“wasn’t joel all about coffee?” as he should. i’d be all about coffee too if i didn’t have it for years

ANUTHA CAAAARD

i really like the Big Blue card too

THAT FUCKING INFECTED IN THE BATHROOM SCARED THE FUCKING SHIT OUT OF ME MY SOUL LEFT MY BODY OH MY GOD

so many fucking side quests oml what do you mean “barko’s”

oh my god there are so many fucking alleyways to go down

THERE’S SO MUCH TO DO I AM SO BUSY FINDING SECRETS AND STUFFS

BARKO’S LOCATED

it’s too dark in here i don’t like it

“they think we’re sheep! BARE YOUR FANGS.” what in the fuckin trump train “sHeEpLe” is goin on in here

i feel like i’m gonna get fucking jumped by infected again in here

THIGH HOLSTER ACQUIRED

omg plz “we can get a little creature to take care of” AND THEN THEY HAVE A FARM AT THE END😭😭😭

STUN BOMB ACQUIRED

i have already spent 2 hours in this fucking QZ holy shit

i just wanna explore rn i don’t wanna progress story atm

i am secret hunting

ANUTHA CARD BABYYY WEST GATE 2

it doesn’t even look like i’ve done that much😭

i also have a bad feeling about this bank

oh fuck this shit. it goes underground

they are ALWAYS underground bro

dina this is not cool, this is scary

i don’t fucking trust this shit

HOW DID I FUCKING KNOW

infected or whateva🙄

SHOTGUN ACQUIRED

FUCK this bank dude i’m GONE

dina said she’d get a farmhouse with the money😭😭

okay i think i’m gonna stop here bc it is literally 5am and i am sleepy haha. no story! but got some goodies and secrets out of the way! i will continue maybe tomorrow? not sure bc i am quite busy but we’ll see!

having a really good time so far and i love watching ellie and dina’s dynamic! still lots of buildings and secrets to loot! i’m excited >:)

[moonjxsung]

hai hai! (anticipated srry for the yapping)

how are you?

(btw pls lmk about that person bc if they come back i rlly don’t want to interact)

sorry about the fire vjj jumpscare😂😂

kitties can rip their toe beans and i am so traumatized by it. thankfully it really wasn’t too bad like he never acts like it’s hurting him. i literally let him out of his travel bag and bro just immediately jumped like an hour after surgery. but we’re keeping him confined until further notice and trying to figure out what happened bc we searched everywhere and no blood or anything. but he’s doing alright & they take out his stitches in two weeks, my angel baby☹️☹️☹️.

i’m sorry to hear about your kitty’s itching! cats do become sensible to environmental changes so it may be that. one of the strays we feed gets runny nose/eyes when there’s a lot of pollen. i heard that giving them bee pollen helps with their environmental allergies. but i haven’t really tried it. maybe something with her food? my senior dog (who passed about two years ago) became allergic to chicken, turkey, and like a million other things) at like 10yrs old. so if it persists that could maybe be a cause? idk but i hope she feels better soon, i hate seeing sick kitties :((

to end the cat discourse, your neighbor!! im so frustrated when people let cats just roam free in environments where they shouldn’t. i’m not really in favor of outdoor/indoor or just outdoor kitties (aside from stray babies ofc, i wish i could take them all💔). my experience with cats outdoors (like not mine but the strays i’ve seen) is always sooooo negative that i just wouldn’t do it, even if where i lived was more appropriate. i had a neighbor (i never interacted with her) who literally abandoned her male intact cat and he just went around getting everyone pregnant and crying at her house. i haven’t seen him for a while bc he wasn’t really a regular (if he was i would’ve found a way to neuter him at least) but that’s so freaking sad, man. i really can’t with people who leave their pets to fend for themselves. so yeah your neighbor really sucks, and the kitty fights with your baby? whaaat? that’s crazy.

and i still can’t get over ateez!!! my bf and i live together so we’re literally always together (that’s why i annoyingly mention him all the time, im sorry, i got anxious attachment 😂). and i was rewatching the coachella performance bc im crazy and he sat down with me (and eventually fell asleep) but not before saying “my bias isn’t mingi anymore, san is just the man here” and i was like ok but mood. i love san so much and yk one of my bias line criteria is ✨cats✨ so san is not only cat emoji but also has a cat ✅✅ i love them, i need to go see them at least once in my life too. they’re just so talented, im so proud of them for coming so far! 😭

and pls send all the pics ever if you do go to txt, i’ll live vicariously through you.

anddd i was lurking through your other asks and i feel you so badly about retinol & sunscreen. i literally have some expression lines and am dying to get rid of them. but im struggling with retinol bc it makes me break out.

(and also, ur response to the anon talking about her y/n moment was too sweet. i feel like kpop can set such high beauty standards that you have to constantly ground yourself bc these people live and breath visuals and voice/dance lessons. i struggle a lot with body image issues being a US midsize and having pcos -and i literally got an emergency ovary removal, not so fun fact! it was terrible and it really fucked up my weight gain/loss- but yeah, your message made me feel better about everything too.)

ily ily bb! we’re currently on a date at a café, drinking iced coffee with our ateez pcs! 😘😘😘

-🐈‍⬛

HELLOOOOO MY SWEET ANGEL HAPPY SUNDAYYYY 🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶

I still can’t believe cats can rip their toe beans 😭😭 it makes so much sense but I just hadn’t considered it and now I’m watching Momo like a HAWK over here I feel like that would so happen to her 😭😭 her itching seems a little better today but seems like it comes and goes ! One of my other cats at my parents’ house struggles from feline eczema or something similar and she has to get steroid injections to tame the flare ups so im hoping it’s not that ☹️ but good to know that bee pollen helps, ill definitely look into that!! Thank you bby 🫶👼

UGH I KNOWWWW her cat disappears for weeks at a time too and I’m like how!!! Are you not worried about where he is!!!!!!! One time he came back with a collar I’m assuming somebody got for him and since then they’ve taken it off so it seems like they’re pretty set on just making him appear stray and I don’t understand the reasoning behind it. All their other pets (they have like 2 dogs I think) are strictly indoors so idk why poor kitty has to be abandoned like that ☹️ I always bring him water and food in the summer because they don’t even leave him with food but I’m just so annoyed they don’t do it themselves ughhh. Also I have a neighbor who did the same thing as yours by abandoning their cat and it went around and got pregnant like 4 times since then ! She passed at a pretty young age probably due to the shortened life span and it was just so heartbreaking. At LEAST get your cat spayed and neutered ffs 🤕

YOUR BF IS SOOOO REAL FOR THAT LMAOOOO 😭 Ateez are crazy talented in person!!! They’re coming back to my city in the summer so I need to start saving and I’m lowkey panicking bc I really want to see itzy, Ateez, txt and NCT Dream but I’m gonna have to sacrifice some shows because money 😀 I might scrap Dream only bc I’m not 100% if Renjun will still be there (my pookie💔) but I cannotttt decide if I want to go to the other shows. If I find txt tickets at a decent price I will 10000% keep you updated how it goes!!!! I also need to see Itzy so bad ugh Ryujin my wife💔

I’m so glad we’re all panicking about expression lines collectively LMAO I just bought this Korean sunscreen that claims to prevent them so we’ll see but the lingering fear of aging is always present 😭 soooo agreed about the body image thing!! Kpop made me hate my body like ten times more then I already did but I have to remind myself these people HAVE to look good for a living like if they had my regular ass job they would not look like that 😭 I just value confidence the most even on days I hate myself!! I’m so sorry to hear about your emergency ovary removal ahhh that must’ve been so scary but I’m so grateful you’re okay and healthy now! Looks mean nothing if you’re not healthy guys take care of yourselves and love the body you have 🥹🫶💞💝💘💕💖

I LOVE YOU BBYYYYY we’re virtually eating cheese danishes together bc I caved and got one (it’s so good if you’re wondering) 💞🫶

[girlreviews]

Review #382: Currents, Tame Impala

Yet another album coming up on ten years old that forces me to reckon with the fact that I too am also almost ten years older than when it came out. They took five years to put out another! By the time they did that we were in the throes of a pandemic. So a lot happened. I had a lot of different haircuts. A lot.

It’s another breakup album. It came out the year I got married. I’m now divorced. It’s been pretty interesting revisiting this record, because my ex-husband and I were super into it. Everyone was, at least everyone who liked alternative music and wore flannel and tiny hats. Whatever iteration of hipster was hanging around East Nashville in 2015, they were playing it in every bougie coffee shop and thrift store. So it fell out of favor for me after a while, I got a little sick of it.

I had actually just seen them live a few years prior, right before moving Stateside. In Australia of all places, where they are from! At a festival called Groovin’ the Moo, in Canberra. I was there on a WILD ride, with a guy I met in London at a NYE party at the Ukrainian embassy (????) through a mutual friend who was dating my bestie. He and I hit it off, stayed up all night doing drugs, talking mad shit, and having a great time. Mans is moving back to Australia in three days. Oh well. Never mind. Nope, four months later I’m there visiting him. This was quite literally bananas, but really fucking fun — also a fucking disaster. It was like we were falling in love, getting together and breaking up all at the same time. The absolute fucking antics we get up to on this trip. We are invited to a house party, and are so drunk before arriving we accidentally break into THE WRONG house trying to attend. We wake up one morning in our room with the bed completely wonky, two legs snapped on it, potato chips absolutely fucking everywhere, all over the bed, floor, surfaces, and there’s just a pug dog snuffling around eating them all. Do not know whose dog it was to this day. Attend this festival, remember absolutely nothing about it other than seeing Tame Impala, return to the UK with a gnarly sunburn, a powerpuff girls pillow bought as a forget-me-not and a plastic frog table marker stolen from a pizza joint. If it doesn’t sound romantic, it’s because it shouldn’t. But we were in LOVE! It was a fucking disaster and it ended quite badly and I arrived in America a broken hollow shell of a woman. This honestly cracks me up. This is exactly the kind of bullshit you’re supposed to pull in your twenties, everyone. And Tame Impala is the exact right soundtrack for it, psychedelic pop rock weirdness. It was their prior album Lonerism that scored that particular moment, with the most prominent track for me being appropriately titled It Feels Like We Only Go Backwards. Teehee.

Anyway, it’s a few years later, I have my shit together a bit now, I’m getting married or already am, and here comes Tame Impala with Currents. It seems like Kevin Parker maybe had some love adventure of his own and he’s gotta get it off his chest, he’s got some feelings. Here’s what I love about this record, and it’s gonna sound like I’m ripping on it, but I’m not. The lyrics, they’re really pretty… What word am I looking for here. They lack sophistication and depth. Man really just says what he would say to his bros when he’s trying to say how he feels about his relationship ending. They’re simple. They’re rudimentary. They’re clumsy. But they’re perfect. Are we poetic when we are messy in a breakup? Do I sound like I was poetic in any shape or form on potato chip pug hangover day? No. It is what it is. There were multiple different KINDS of potato chips, guys. It’s like we thought we were sowing potato chip seeds to grow a little garden. The pug got his head stuck in a bag for a hot second. You can’t make it what it isn’t. It’s a damn mess. But you CAN make the music and sound emote. And that he does, magically and wonderfully, carrying the lyrics. It works together so well. It’s a journey.

Let it Happen, first of all, I challenge you to run to this. It’s almost eight minutes and is great for keeping pace (I have mentioned my running playlists are wild and I’m not kidding). A friend pointed out to me this past weekend that something I tend to gravitate towards in songs — and they’re right — is ones that evolve and take you on a trip. The end of the song is unrecognizable from the beginning. I love that. This is one of those. It also just fucking slaps. Great start.

Eventually and Less I Know The Better are prime examples of the sonic mastery and lyrical lacking just sort of working. They’re also the most obvious breakup tracks and those simple words are what make it so god damn relatable:

“She said it’s not now or never

In ten years we’ll be together

I said better late than never

Just don’t let me wait forever

Don’t let me wait forever”

Past Life. FUCK, this song is so fucking good it’s so fucking DIFFERENT. Can’t even speak on it, just go stick it on and vibe your ass off, okay?

Disciples is my absolute favorite. For a few reasons. I also love me a short track. But this one is SO fun to sing, and it’s so chirpy and upbeat for a song that’s basically about telling someone you used to care for that they’re a shitty person now (“now it’s like the world owes you, walking around like everybody should know you”). By the way, have you ever done that, told someone you loved that you officially think they suck now? Interesting experience. Not sure whether I recommend it or not to be honest, maybe one of those things that you’ve gotta try on for yourself to see if it’s for you. But anyway, also there’s just some really great steering wheel slap moments of bass and percussion that make me want to DIE and ASCEND from this mortal plain to wherever this song was born from. I said what I said.

If not for Disciples, there’s no question that my favorite track would be ‘Cause I’m a Man. I still remember driving my friend Brittney home in my Lincoln LS, and she was like, you gotta hear the new Tame Impala track. I honestly was not impressed. But she was so animated, and made me listen over and over until I got it. This is a rare song for me, because even now I like it more with each listen. It’s not a surprise, since it’s about his own self reflection on how shitty men are, how they’re always just making sad little excuses for why they don’t measure up to women, and are always letting us down. He does a good job, he really does (“Cause I’m a man, woman, I’ll never be as strong as you”). But, throughout the song he makes these kind of lazy, semi-sexual “uh!” noises and they’re honestly hilarious. They just really add something. I can’t explain why. It’s sort of a nice touch of self depreciation that I truly appreciate.

It’s a one of a kind record, really. It was different from their previous, and their follow up didn’t match it. They have a new single out with Justice and I’m told it’s very good. I saw them again in 2022 at a festival in Barcelona, much less wild and drug fueled than my previous go around (I’m in my thirties now, who has the energy). The sound was bad and my feet hurt, BUT Kevin Parker did us all a solid and covered Last Nite by The Strokes which cheered us all up, because they got COVID and pulled out last minute. Ah well, Julian’s a creep anyhow and could never write something as self aware as Currents. He’s still hitting on teenage girls in his late forties. Kevin Parker, I better not find you pulling the same shit or I will be coming for you and it will be ugly.

[empressofthesunwriter]

Friendly Faces Everywhere

Codename Dovahkiin Part 2

Now that the Stick of Truth RPG is over it's time for N.K. to face the normal everyday life of South Park.

She should have known nothing in South Park is ever normal!

Day to day the craziness of this supposed quiet little mountain town she has to combat now.

Thank god, she has Tammy, Wendy, her boys, and her Social Media/Magical Girl Powers on her side.

This gonna be a wild ride!

Main Pairing: New Kid/Kenny McCormick/Kyle Broflovski

Chapter 7:This is not you!

The Christmas break is over soon.

Too soon for my taste.

I enjoyed it greatly.

Having dates with Heidi, doing something with my female friends, and spend time with Leo.

I totally and completely ignore the fever dreams I had on Christmas.

Just ignore it and be a good girlfriend, friend, and sister.

Nothing to see here officer.

Only a normal pre-teen living her normal life in a…really fucked up city.

But we will ignore this.

Ignoring is good.

Anyway, the first school day after the break starts with a school assembly where also our parents participate.

I’m sitting between my parents, wondering what will happen next.

Mr. Mackey explains to us that Principal Victoria got fired since she didn’t react right to a student calling rape "hot Cosby" and that we will get a new principal.

The men that walks in…I get shivers all over my body.

Not because he is creepy or anything.

I know his type.

That’s a dudebro who is full-on political correctness.

My gut is right as he tells us clearly: “I don't know about you, but frankly I'm sick and tired of how minority groups are marginalized in today's society. I'm here because this place is lost in a time warp! Students who still use the word "retarded"! A teacher who said women without wombs should get an AIDS test! A chef "person of color" who the children had sing soul songs and who the children drove to kill himself!”

“No, he got brainwashed by a cult.”, corrects him Leo.

This earns my little brother two days' detention.

P.C. Principal is not joking around. Alone his name says it all.

Hey, I’m the first one who is against injustice and all that, but these dudebro’s are too extreme.

Even Mr. Mackey gets detention because he answered P.C. Principals question where the minoritys are correct.

I mean, we do have only Token.

Yet the dudebro doesn’t care.

We will need all to watch our tongue around him.

After the little assembly our parents go home or to work and we start our school day.

When it’s break time I call all my friends and my girlfriend over to my locker.

“Okay, my amazons, listen up.”, I begin in a hushed tone. “I hate to say it but we have to be careful now what we say, because we can’t even make jokes anymore. P.C. Principal is out for blood and he will pick up any political incorrectness, even if it’s sarcasm or the likes.”

“You are white as a sheet.”, points Heidi out and rubs my cheek in comfort. “Are you alright N.K.?”

“Yeah, I never saw you this scarred. I thought you would find P.C. Principal awesome!”, wonders Bebe.

All our friends make agreeing sounds.

I take Heidi’s hand and shake my head with wide eyes.

“I know his P.C. from when I lived in Miami. All and nothing is an offense to this guys. And the worst is you can’t argue with them because they will throw at you the racist, bigoted, or queerphobic card. They even don’t care if you are part of a minority. So from now on we have to watch our mouth.”

Wendy frowns at me.

“This sounds like a personal experience.”

“It is. When I lived in Miami I was dating an Hispanic girl. It wasn’t anything serious, but we had a good time with each other. Well till the day we were at this Starbucks.”, I recount my first time facing this kind of P.C. I still shiver thinking about it. “I told her she looked tired. That’s when a dudebro literally jumped up from his chair and called me out because I stereotyped her as a sleepy person. Even her telling him she really was tired, didn’t help. That guy was not stopping. I’m not ashamed to say I cried like a river. Never has someone completely destroyed me like this dude.”

All their chins meet the floor and Heidi hugs me to console me.

“Oh damn, this doesn’t sound good!”, say’s Red.

“If some of them made N.K. cry it’s serious.”, adds Nichole.

“All right, we need to watch what we are saying around P.C. Principal.”, reminds them Wendy. “Anyone who gets our pretty much real Amazon crying and being ashamed of herself is not someone you wanna mess with.”

The school bell sounds, meaning we all have to go back to our classrooms, which we do.

Only one day has to pass before the boys come to me.

And with boys I mean I saw how they send Leo over to talk to me, while Stan’s Gang minus Cartman and Craig’s gang look from save distance on.

I’m standing with Heidi at my locker, putting my books away, so we can go to the cafeteria to have lunch with our girl group.

“Hey big sis, hey Heidi.”, greets us Leo nervous. He so doesn’t want to do it. “The guys…I mean I was wondering if you N.K. will do something against P.C. Principal.”

I just look around him to fix the little cowards with a glare.

“Really brave of you all. Send my own brother in hopes I agree more. If you have to say something say it.”, I make clear.

At least the fourth-grade boys do look a bit embarrassed.

“Please N.K. you are the strongest person we know.”, Stan begins. “If you can’t get rid of P.C. Principal no one can.”

“Also since you and Heidi are the only same-sex couple, maybe you can go together to him. He will surely listen to your more since you are a minority.”, adds Craig monotone like always.

I can’t believe what I heard.

“We will certainly not get on P.C. Principals’ bad grades.”, I tell them, taking my girlfriend’s hand. “People like P.C. Principal don’t see reason, they see only their way. You can’t win against him in normal ways.”

“So we should just give up? That dude will ruin anything, what is with free speech and all.”, ask me, Kyle.

It’s weird talking to him after…well all that happened.

“No, that’s not what N.K. means.”, answers Heidi for me. I’m so thankful for her. “If you wanna get rid of P.C. Principal you have to play dirty.”

“Go to Cartman, he is the evil psychopath you need.”, I point out.

With that, we make our way to the cafeteria.

When school ends we all heard the news.

Apparently P.C. Principal kicked Cartman’s ass so hard that the fatass is now at the hospital.

I’m not ashamed to admit that I’m happy about that. Cartman deserves all the beatings in the world.

Yet, I’m disappointed that our local psycho couldn’t win against P.C. Principal.

I have a feeling the dudebro will stay for a long time.

The P.C. party the next day in school and hearing there Kyle stopped saying Caitlyn Jenner isn’t a hero is proof enough.

Still, I can’t help but wonder…I have my Social Media Power and my Magical Girl Form…maybe I could have WON against them.

Why did I not fight?

I’m asking this myself later at night laying in my bed.

Did I lose my will to fight?

Yes, I had a bad experience with a dudebro before, but I never backed down.

Not if I have all this power on my side.

Or…I’m just a little girl with powers who thinks she can change the world but when she should do it she shows her true colors.

The colors of a coward.

I’m so confused.

That’s when I hear how someone is knocking on my window.

…What the fuck I’m on the second floor who is crazy enough to climb up my window?

I get my answers as it opens dramatically and I see a masked boy with a dark cape and a green M on his chest and a little question mark on his hood.

“Novella-Karin Campo.”, says the mysterious boy my name in such a deep voice that sends shivers down my back. Not out of fear…I have a voice kink. So you can imagine what I’m feeling. “We need to talk. Transform and meet me at your front yard.”

“Wait a second who are you, you mysterious caped dude with the sexy voice?! How do you know me and my powers?”

“Mysterion. All will be clear to you soon.”

Dramatically he jumps down and my chin meets the floor.

I don’t know what is going on, but this Mysterion is the hottest guy I ever met.

I have a girlfriend, I have a girlfriend, I have a girlfriend I like a lot! Don’t be a thot, N.K.!

Still, I transform and float down to the ground.

Mysterion just looks stoic at me, a dark intimidating silhouette in the moonlight. I swerve dark shadow tendrils dance around him.

I feel a power coming from him…so dark…so old…so not understandable.

This turns me even more on.

I may be bisexual but I admit I always dreamed of meeting a dashing mysterious superhero and being whisked away at night in his strong arms.

But I’m no damsel…I kind of a hero too…okay more a Magical Girl but whatever, you get my point.

Once again remember I have I girlfriend and don’t be a thot!

“So Mysterion.”, I begin curious. “Will you now tell me who you are and what you want from me?”

Something similar like a smile is on his lips.

“You can’t guess?”

“I would remember someone with a voice like that.”

“You only need to know that I’m your friend.”, he tells me. “And as your friend, I have to ask you…what the fuck is wrong with you?”

Hey!

I cross my arms and send him an angry look.

“So not only do you not want to tell me who you are, but you also insult me. Doesn’t makes you look good Mysterion.”

“Some needs to be straight with you-“

“-I’m allergic to straight, ew!-“

“-I’m not even commenting on that. When you first came to this town you were this unstoppable force of nature but since you are together with your girlfriend you became tame. The N.K. I meet would have done something against P.C. Prinicipal, yet you told us to go to Cartman. So I’m asking you, what is fucking wrong with you?”

Speechless I stare at him.

…I hate to admit it, but he is right. The same thoughts tormented me.

“Look dude, you are one of my friends, as it seems. Also, I will be frank with you…Heidi is important to me. I messed up with Kyle and Kenny and made Heidi unsure about our relationship. I will not destroy it only to help the boys.”

Mysterion has only one thing to say to me: “Coward.”

I wince, but I don’t disagree.

“So you put your relationship before anything? You have a gift, it’s your damn duty to use it for the good of the people.”

I’m remembering my fever dream where I was divorced from Heidi because I put my powers in the first place.

“What do you know about gifts? I NEVER ASKED TO BE MADE THIS WAY!”, I shout the last part into his face, pointing an accusing finger at him.

The masked boy… just looks so tired and defeated now.

“I understand you better than you think.”, he starts to tell me. “I have also a gift…a curse I didn’t ask for.”

This…didn’t expect that. I feel the sincerity of Mysterion. He looks like he lived a thousand lifetimes and only saw the worst of humanity.

“What is your curse?”, I ask quietly.

“I can’t die.”

What?!

“I've experienced death, countless times. Sometimes I see a bright light. Sometimes I see heaven. Or hell. But eventually, no matter what, I wake up in my bed, wearing the same old clothes.”

Shocked I put my hand on my mouth. His desperation is clear as water. Something like this you can’t fake.

“And the worst part? Nobody even remembers me dying. I go to school the next day, and everyone is just like, "Oh hey Kenny." Even if they had seen me get decapitated with their own eyes.”

…Kenny?

Tears trail down my eyes as I cry for him.

For my princess.

I should have known it was him.

He wants to say more, but I just hug him to me.

I hug him with all the love I have in my heart for him.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry!”, I wail. “You must think I’m the biggest egoist in the world. I never wanted to hurt you guys, no one, but it seems I can only do that. You are right I should have helped you guys…but I don’t wanna lose Heidi.”

He hugs me back, petting my head.

“There is more, isn’t there N.K.?”

“I had a dream on Christmas Eve. I saw a future where I abandon you guys for Heidi and then I abandon her for my powers. I don’t want this future to happen!”

It feels good to finally speak about it.

Mysterion…Kenny hugs me tighter, rubbing my back in comfort.

“N.K. it was only a dream.”

“It felt so real!”

“Maybe that was just your fears getting the best out of you.”, he hypnotizes. “I can promise you that I will never abandon you…I like you to much for it, even if you don’t like me anymore this way.”

A wet laugh escapes my lips.

“Silly Kenny, it’s a mess of emotions, because I STILL like you and Kyle. I’m sure Heidi knows this too and yet she told me I should stay friends with you guys. I don’t deserve her.”

Careful Kenny wipes away my tears, tutting at me.

“Now N.K. that’s too melodramatic, even for me. Why don’t you just talk with us and make a mess like this? If you don’t talk your dream will come true.”

I sniffle and Kenny hands me a tissue. I blow my nose loudly. Something like a tiny smile is on his lips.

“I love you, Kenny, I really do.”, I confess finally. “Now knowing you are just like me…it makes me love you more. You understand me. You did from the moment we meet each other as princess and mage.”

“I love you too N.K., I never felt this way for a girl. You are so important to me, please don’t push me away again.”

“Heidi…I love her too…I just…I can’t break up with her…I love her…”

The hooded boy signs, stroking my cheek.

“Babe…you know… I don’t have anything against it if you want to date Heidi still…she is a cute and nice girl…I could learn to love her too.”

…I blink rapidly at him.

Did I hear him right?

“Kenny…what do you mean?”

“I read this up on the internet. Polyamory-relationships? I would be okay with this. Don’t know how Kyle thinks about it, but if you want to date other people while we also are together I would accept it. I just…want you so much…in any way you can give me.”

My chin meets the floor.

I can’t believe what I’m hearing!

Mamma was right, I should have fucking talked with the boys before and not assumed things!

“Kenny so that you know, I would literally jump you now and make you cum with my mouth till you are dry because this makes me so happy! But we need to talk to Heidi first. She has to be okay with this too.”

I hear how he has to bit down a moan and gives me a hot look.

“You are a tease, but you are also right. Let’s talk with Heidi first thing in the morning.”

We both smile brightly at each other.

 Maybe…it really can work.

“One last thing, why did you dress up in your superhero persona to talk to me?”

“I had a feeling you would have ignored Kenny because you are also stubborn.”

“…You got me there.”

We say goodbye to each other with a hug. Back in my room, I send Heidi a text that we need to talk before school about something.

I hope she will agree to this too.

But if I have to choose between Heidi and Kenny…god this will be difficult.

God, if you love me make it go a way we all can be happy.

Me, the author, points at you, the readers: Will you hear N.K. prayer and make N.K., Heidi, and Kenny canon? Review!   

Next time on Pokemon, I mean, Chinpokemon, no wait, on Friendly Faces Everywhere the thrilling conclusion.

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[kdipshit]

In the moment

I notice I self sabotage as soon as someone notices how good I’m doing, when I get praise. It’s like my head thinks ‘Oooo yo some trust, let’s see how much I can get away with’ and I follow suit because it’s comfortable and what I always do. I’m not sure where this stems from…. And to push through that is difficult and I get irritable, frustrated and snappy. I’m trying to work through this, and I really really want to, it’s just the emotions scare me and continue to get worse until I leave the situation. I don’t think I’ve ever just ridden it out, I’ve always escaped. But I’ll get through it, if I just keep focused on my goals, writing and well being. Well I can’t be well I don’t step up, I’ll die, maybe, I’ll end up in the hospital and I would be suicidal. Maybe I’ll be the writer I’ve always been in my head, either way I’m still a writer. I guess I should still choose the path that teaches me discipline and determination and all that shit coz If I choose the other pathway I’ll never change.

I feel like I’m going insane man. There is so much information I get, but hardly and structure or organising, maybe that’s a sign I shouldn’t have that much things juggling up there at once. I see and am so aware of all of this, but it taking all of my effort and energy. My sister said maybe I’m trying too hard. Maybe I should prioritise where my energy goes. Since I’m doing relatively fine with my mental health, I can stop making that my #1 priority and shift work up there. I just have to stick it out and ride the waves because my #1 priority is work. And the holiday I get at the end of the year.

Why is this moment not enough?

When I’m happy, there’s not a care in the world, not 1 single doubt about myself, any obstacle I face becomes easily regulated and controlled effortlessly, I have the means to fix anything, I have energy and it makes my life so much easier because I’m not connected to my thoughts in an unhealthy way. Yanno that episode on bojack horseman where he’s in his mothers childhood home and would get drunk and have flashbacks of what happened back in her day? And bojack is an absolute MESS because of his thoughts. Idk if that makes sense but it does to me, that’s how I feel.

Sick of explaining myself, yall sick of me expunging? Coz shit. I’m really over this shit like I need to make a change 555 is everywhere, here there Fuck ya okay well SHIT. there’s no more side quests if I want to continue moving forward I have to get past the boss. That’s pushing by through, who knows how long or short this will be, it’s a must. It could be really short, just do it, I feel like I’m dying stop being scared and just do it.

Work is number one. Get that fucking bag.

I’m extremely obsessive, so literally WHY NOT use that obsession and put it into the job that pays me. If I can do it with a Person I can do it with a job. Motherfucking watch me. Ok ok I like to see some enthusiasm I’m very grateful let’s meditate on this feeling 🧘🏻‍♀️

I don’t think I’m capable of letting anyone new in. So I keep my friendships and naturally they fall off or we grow apart, I only have my bestfriend who’s always there. That’s all I need, and how incredible grateful I am for that.