#It's not my intention to make you feel guilty Anon you have the right to laugh.

[sugar-grigri]

i want you to talk about fumikos backwards hand in 148 so bad, it makes me laugh

Is that what you mean, Anon? Actually, this isn't the first mistake made in part 2. I remember someone once pointing out square overruns, or even Nayuta's hair crossing a dialogue bubble.

Honestly, I don't find it funny. Fujimoto needs a fucking break. Even if the cutting is still excellent, he doesn't have the time to draw as diligently as he did in the first chapters.

To mask this lack, he's enlarged his line, and although the actions and expressions work, he still needs a break.

I'm just waiting for his hiatus

[gay-dorito-dust]

OKAY hear me out

Soft!Jason with a very touchy S/O, like we all know Jay alr has SO much trauma and he needs to constantly be touching them, making sure they're still with him, and the S/O, they're more than happy about this (LOVE LANG IS PHYSICAL CONTACT), constantly holding hands, little shoulder bumps, snuggling, forehead touches (!!!), bascially giving a Nick/Charlie vibe here but STILL

lol sorry about the long rant this thots just stuck in my head

(also can i be 🐺anon?)

Yes you may be 🐺 anon. :)

Jason wouldn’t consider himself to be a touchy person or someone who’s primary way of showing appreciation and love through physical touch like you. And yet after everything he’s been through and done, Jason finds himself extending out a hand and wordlessly intertwining your fingers together, letting out a deep sigh of relief as everything became okay again. All just because he was holding onto you.

You made everything okay for Jason.

So you knew when it was really bad whenever Jason was practically clinging onto you with no intentions of letting go. His grip was like a vice that would tighten at any signs of movement as he thought you were trying to pull away, when in actuality you were just trying to adjust yourself to a more comfortable position, and his breathing was uneven and ragged like he had just ran a marathon without any breaks. He’d go even further by burying his face deep into your chest just so he could feel that you were alive and still with him.

It hurt you to see him like this, it truly did, and so you’d respond to his need for touch in kind by running your hand up and down his back and resting your forehead against his head, pressing kisses into it every now and then whenever you heard the sound of pitiful, soft whimpering coming from the back of his throat as you cooed softly at him gentle reminders that you weren’t going anywhere without him.

‘I’m here. I’m right here Jason, you can feel me breathing can’t you?’

‘Yeah.’ He murmurs and you press a kiss against head.

‘Then that should be more than enough proof to know that I’m not leaving you, not now, not ever and I’ll prove it everyday if I have to.’ You tell him and you truly meant what you said as the following days you would do a plethora of things to set Jason’s mind at ease and quite any and every inner demon he had that tried to make him think otherwise.

In the mornings you would snuggle yourself further into Jason. Making sure that your forehead was pressed against his, rubbing your noses together and kissing his eyelids until they flutter open to reveal his beautiful eyes, making sure that you were the first thing Jason saw and welcoming him into the morning with a soft smile and a series of kisses scattered to his cheeks, jaw and lips.

‘Good morning handsome.’ You greeted him.

‘It’s always a good morning when you’re the first thing I see angel.’ He greeted you back in kind, voice low and raspy as his hands on your lower back kept you within close proximity.

‘It looks like someone’s been reading too much Jane Austen as of late to be this romantic first thing in the morning.’ You teased, smiling more at his words as he shrugs. ‘Guilty as charged but I don’t need Jane Austen to be romantic when it comes naturally whenever I’m with you.’ You smother him in more kisses after that because you were unable to come up with anything that could compare that to.

In the evening when you and Jason were starting to settle down after an eventful day, you could often be found sat next to him on the couch as he read his book while holding onto your thigh with his free hand, his thumb would trace patterns into your skin; Whereas you would go through your phone and occasionally pressing you knee against his. It was a relaxing moment the two of you often found yourselves in that it might as well have become somewhat of a tradition; sitting in comfortable silence with one another doing your own things in tandem.

However Jason -whenever he felt you weren’t close enough to his liking- would press his shoulder against yours and lean in to press a kiss to your temple before going back to reading his book. ‘I feel like I’m rubbing off on you with how much more touchy you’ve been lately.’ You told him after a while and Jason bookmarks his place in the story and puts the book down on the table infront of you before looking over at you.

‘Does it bother you when I do that?’ He asks, feeling a little vulnerable.

‘No.’ You said without hesitation and grabbed his hand, intertwining your fingers together and kissing each and every one of his knuckles before resting your conjoined hands on your lap. ‘I love that you feel comfortable enough to reach out to me for physical comfort. It means a lot and I’d never want to undermine that.’ You continued and you could see Jason visibly relax as a smile graced his lips.

‘You almost scared me half to death there sweetheart.’ He says in relief. ‘And the reason why I reach out for you for comfort is because you bring me comfort and bring my mind some semblance of peace.’ He admits and you couldn’t help but squeeze his hand as a silent way to echo his sentiment that he too brought you comfort. Jason smiled and brought your hand to his lips, mimicking you by pressing kisses to each and every one of your knuckles while maintaining eye contact with you; It was a simple enough action to make anyone flustered at the intensity of his seemingly never ending devotion.

‘I love you Jaybirdie and thank you for choosing me to be your safe place.’ You said softly.

‘I love you too sweetheart and thank you for being my safe place.’ Jason replied, pulling you in by your joined hands, caging you against his warm chest, as he shifted his position to lay down on the couch where you both took a well deserved nap.

No nightmares or night terrors greeted Jason that night as he help you in his arms, dreaming of nothing but you and only you and your smile. His safe place.

[wegc]

perv chan content coming up u say👀👀how funny considering that i’ve been having perv skz brainrot for days🤭consider this for me rq.

so we know from that one 2 kids room how channie loves feeling needed right? combine that with the clothes stealing trope and u get:

perv roommate channie who steals your clothes from your room to get off with because the smell of you makes him fucking dizzy. and there’s an added bonus—he knows you’re gonna come to him, tearing up and face flushed from frustration, begging him to pretty please, help me find my favourite pair of lace panties, i’ve looked fucking everywhere! how can he say no to you, when you’re begging so pretty, when you want his help so bad? he just has to be a good friend and search the place with you (no, it’s not because the feeling of you asking him, needing him and nobody else makes his head spin and his pants tighten). don’t forget to bend down and look in that corner over there!

and if he’s memorizing every inch of those pretty teary eyes, imagining how much more they’d water while you’re choking on his cock, or if he’s shamelessly watching that cute ass of yours as you get on your knees and bend over in those obscenely revealing shorts you love wearing around the house? if he strokes himself later that night to the image of you grinding your soaking cunt against him, pleading with him to fuck you stupid in that adorably whiny voice?

well. that’s nobody’s business but his own, is it?

mwah love u !

-🍒 anon

perv!chan who's unhealthy obsession with feeling needed has his cock aching every time you're begging him to help you look for your stolen panties because what? my y/n needs me? she's relying on me? only me?

chan finds himself entranced when you rush to him, breathing heavily and teary-eyed because he can't prevent his depraved brain from thinking about how you'd pant and cry even more when he's fucking into you deep and rough with zero intentions to stop. he can't stop thinking about how you'd cling onto his strong, buff arms, mewling and hiccupping against his mouth, sniffling cutely, begging him to make you cum. begging him to cum inside you and stuff you full. you need it after all, don't you? only channie can contain all that fussing, right? maybe he should stuff your mouth full with his cock right after to keep you from whining!

let's not think about how he'd graze his clothed cock against your ass as you're bent over! he feels so guilty; you're genuinely upset about those stupid, flimsy lace panties that drive him insane too, but he's far too greedy to give them back. either way, he can't give them back now! not when they're soiled with his warm, sticky cum, carefully concealed under his pillow; not when they're beside your cum stained plushie! it smells so much like you! did you push your tits against the cute toy? did you grind your insatiable cunt against it? just one more time. one more load and he'll give them back. should he wash them before doing so? or should he leave his filthy cum on them for you to see?

he'll just have to buy you a new ones that he'll eventually steal again, i fear!

[crawley-fell]

Please god please HOW WAS MACBETH

Okay bestie lets get into it!! Obvs it's...literally Macbeth lol so I doubt i'm spoiling the plot for anyone here however if anyone reading this does have tickets and doesn't want to know anything about staging etc i suggest u avert your eyes now

Anon babes it was marvellous. David was so commanding?? he's built like a string bean but when he was up on stage he looked BIG and powerful. The character development was so nuanced, the descent into madness was manic and chaotic but eventually steady and calm - he literally snapped a little boys neck with his bare hands in the battle scene it was gruesome. I've seen one too many productions of Macbeth where its pretty much all pinned on Lady Macbeth being the brains behind the operation but it was very obvious from the start of this production that Macbeth had plenty of malicious thoughts and intentions of his own. He needed a little bit of convincing from LM but obviously your average person cannot be coerced into murder lol this man was out for blood from the START. Cush Jumbo was DIVINE and the perfect enabler, their chemistry was spicy and sensual and I loved it. They changed the script so that LM visits Lady MacDuff before the latter is murdered and its sooo good it makes Lady Macbeth so much more 3 dimensional rather than the usual evil witchy woman, it makes her human and Jumbo portrays her beautifully. It really was exciting for the production to be so intimate. The Donmar is a LOVELY black box theatre not many seats at all so you're very close to the action. This is my 5th time seeing DT on stage (prev. Much Ado About Nothing, Richard II, Don Juan in Soho & Good) and they've all been at big venues so it felt very different. The use of headphones was soooo good and it helped them keep the pace of the show (it was 1hr50 with no interval). Rather than dramatic asides like in the script the actors could whisper and it was RIGHT in your ear which made it feel very personal and dark like you were really in the character's heads. You never saw any of the visions (the dagger, the witches, banquo's ghost) which is how i always prefer it to be portrayed personally because you know... they're not actually there this man is just guilty AF and losing his grasp on reality!! But the sound effects they used in these moments were verrrry good and helped set the scene, lots of spooky music and sounds of screaming and whispering etc. And just generally through out the production you heard every. single. word. because of the headphones which was just delicious.

Final note because when u came into my inbox u were probably just expecting a simple 'yeah i really enjoyed it!!' and instead i've written a mini essay BUT in the battle scene at the end David really did win the award for most agile man in his 50s, he head-butt like 4 people and i was like...damn boy can u come over and fight me some time

[rysko]

my request would be literally anything with luca changretta x shelby sister that pairing in this fandom is so my guilty pleasure love your writing so so much, whether you make it into a drabble, hcs or a mini fic i would be happy — gotta love that forbidden enemy lovin 😋

Too old for this - Luca Changretta x F!reader

summary: Keeping secrets, lying to your family, sneaking out...All to see a man, god, what are you? Seventeen again?

OR three times you snuck out to see Luca, and one time he snuck out to see you.

Warnings: Peaky-typical swearing, very minor violence, this is just romantic-comedy-themed fluff,

A/N: Special thanks (and a big fuck you) to @red-riding-wood, next time we race in writing we're making rules.

Aaaaaaanyways, So Sorry this took so long anon! This writing slump was horrible. I really hope you'll enjoy this silly thing!

tag list (yay i have one finally!): @red-riding-wood @peakyswritings

This was stupid. This was so dumb.

Coat hung loosely around your shoulders, shoes in your hands as if to not make more noise than necessary, you snuck through the Small Heath Shelby house corridors. Almost cartoonishly so, when your frame passed one of the occupied rooms. If you had to guess, the last time you did that was years ago, when you were just a teenage girl with overprotective brothers, now you're an adult, rough-around-the-edges woman...with the same overprotective brothers.

Though, this time it's not a nice stableboy you're sneaking out to see. Now it seems like your brothers would have every right to threaten the man you're seeing with a blinding.

You slowly go down the old, wooden stairs, wincing at every crack and whine that echoes. The whole house is dark, the room illuminated only by the street lamps outside.

Almost...

Before you reach for the doorknob, you clumsily take the keys into your teeth to put your shoes on, which puts you in quite an embarrassing position when a table light behind you suddenly turns on.

"Aren't you a bit too old to be sneaking about Y/N?" Polly asked with a smugly raised eyebrow, nursing a glass of whiskey, legs crossed on the velvet red armchair. You spit out the keys.

"I'm not sneaking." You try to compose yourself as best as you can. "I'm going for a walk."

"Very conspicuous behaviour for a walk, love." The glass muffles her chuckle. Was she just...waiting here?

"I just don't want Tommy to get in my hair whenever I even look in the doors' direction." You whine. "I'll go crazy in this house soon." This seemed to soften Polly up just a bit, or maybe activate the part of her brain which insists on the 'fuck them' mentality when it comes to obeying Tommy's orders.

"Just don't get into trouble. God knows i need to tell you that." She dismissed you with a flick of the wrist, and you just nodded before rushing out the door, as if Polly could change her mind any second.

Street after street, the tension slowly eased off your shoulders as you were exiting the tight Shelby territory. It was a close call once in a while, someone almost recognizing you before you could cover your face more. A group of men whistling after you before you could disappear in a dark back alley. Slowly, you closed in on the place you agreed to meet a man by the name you even feared to say in your head, as maybe Tommy would sit there by sheer coincidence, resulting in you getting cut, or him, or both of you, how Shakespearean...

How has it gotten to the point where you are happily fucking the enemy? Devil knows, honestly.

In the back of your mind, you always had a nagging feeling Luca only started seeing you to spite Tommy. This wouldn't be a problem, of course, you regularly told yourself. You're spiting Tommy yourself!

No, that honestly didn't help. The truth is, whatever Changretta's intentions were, or, still are, you found him irresistibly captivating. Like a substance you just can't resist, one that soothes and pleasures, but at the same time comes with a fifty-page warning label. You can see this blowing up in your face from a mile away, in a million different ways. Yet, every visit, every phone call, hell, every sneakily delivered note shuts off any sense you have left in yourself.

And now you feel like losing it again, when just in front of the speakeasy Luca asked to meet you, a very familliar set of hands gently rest on your waist from behind.

"Took you long enough doll." A kiss on the cheek accompanies the low foreign drawl of Luca's voice, sending shivers down your neck and spine. Shit, if all of you will die soon, you might as well have some fun until then. It's not like Tommy's staying celibate in mourning.

"You're saying that to a doll that has to endure my brothers mythering about town. Sneaking out in the middle of the night isn't as easy for me as it is for you." With your arms crossed, you motion to one of the alleys you emerged from just moments ago. "There's all sorts of shady blokes out and about."

"M'sorry, i got impatient, that's all." You could feel his thumb gently rubbing against your waist "Anyone gave you trouble? You got the gun I got you?" Luca pulled back, looking you over, the slightest hint of concern visible in his dark eyes.

"Yes. To the second thing. I'll be fine." You sigh, relaxing your shoulders. "Are we going in?"

"Right this way cara." Luca's lips curled into a small smile. He linked your arms together and in a nearly over-the-top way led you down the stairs of the high-class Speakeasy.

You might as well have some fun, that's all this is after all.

The loud whistle of the conductor woke you up from an on-and-off slumber, the train from Birmingham to London wasn't exactly the comfiest place to rest your head in. From outside the window, the ever-so-lively London train platform came into view.

To be honest, it surprised you when Luca invited you to spend the weekend in London, even more so when you managed to form quite an elaborate story to justify the trip to your family, or more accurately, Polly. Tommy seemed preoccupied with fighting the Italians, chasing the May lady around town, and making quite mediocre gin to even care what you were up to. Needless to say, officially you finally found a friend that you just have to visit. Polly seemed to pay it little mind, but the sly look in her eye, as she saw you off at the door, made you just a tad paranoid that she might have caught on.

Like always, this will bite you in the arse sooner or...sooner.

Up until now, every 'visit' you paid Luca hadn't lasted for more than half a day, only once reaching a full 24 hours when, to your horror, you managed to oversleep. That was a morning of sloppily put-on clothes and numerous muttered 'shits' and 'craps', of course, accompanied by a very amused Luca doing everything in his power to distract you.

What you were doing right now seemed like a step up from the usual routine. Two days aren't going to fly by with just sex, though, that wouldn't be so bad. But lately, you realized you just wanted to...ugh, spend time with him. However sappy this sounded. But that's not what this is. What even is 'this'? When you and Luca met, what happened was purely driven by want, maybe with more than a touch of curiosity of the 'forbidden fruit' in the form of the enemy. Sweet, with sour at the back of your tongue.

Lately, you realized, you only feel the sweet when you kiss Luca. And though you'd never admit it, you dread him not feeling the same.

You two have your moments. Pillow talks with topics never discussed with anyone before, coffee filled with banter worthy of an old married couple, and non-sexual touches that linger for just a bit longer than they should. It's addicting and confusing at the same time.

And that addiction and confusion just led you all the way to London.

Stretching out of your seat, you reach for your bag in the luggage compartment, only for a stranger to take it instead.

"There you go, Miss." The man, looking maybe a decade your senior smiled handing you the bag.

"Thank you, sir." You muster a polite smile, praying internally that the stranger isn't from the same place you are. "I could've done it myself though."

"It's really nothing, common kindness it is..." The longer he spoke, the more his voice trailed off. His eyes widened, studying your frame and most importantly, your face with a new approach. "You're-"

shit

"Thankyougoodbye." You rush and almost run out of the carriage, running into multiple people and throwing rushed half-assed apologies their way. You're stopped by a strong, painful grip on your arm, the man from before pushing you further down the platform, more secluded from people.

"I knew you were familiar." He grabbed the collar of your shirt and pushed you into a pillar roughly, knocking a bit of air out of your lungs. "One of those Shelby devils!" The man's gaze was furious, almost seeing red.

"Let me go." You ordered, trying your best not to attract attention to the both of you. "And we can both forget about this." You're trying your best to speak sternly and diplomatically, yet more than a hint of fear is hearable in your voice. He seems to notice.

"You ruined me!" The Brummie spat. "I'll cut your pretty face just like they cut me brothers." A rough, callous hand cupped your jaw to hold it in place, the other reaching into his jacket. You feel a mixture of panic and adrenaline make its way to your veins.

"Get the fuck off me!" All your strength goes towards your legs. You kicked him back a foot or two, which only seemed to infuriate him more. Before he could take even a step towards you, he's violently grabbed by... Wait, Luca?

"How 'bout you let the lady go, hm?" His grip on the brummies' collar turned red, almost lifting the man off the ground. That wasn't reflected at all in the way Luca was speaking however, for the first time he seemed...calm, condescending even. That only changed when the man didn't seem to take no for an answer. "That wasn't a fucking request." Luca's voice became a gravelly threat, which resulted in the attacker promptly looking between you and Luca as if weighing the risk and reward. Finally, he nodded his head frantically.

Luca didn't need to be told twice. He almost threw the man aside, letting him limp off into the distance. The Italian was almost immediately by your side, gently cupping your face, checking for any sign of hurt or damage. You feel his thumb caress a small spot next to your brow, despite you being almost sure you hadn't been hit anywhere near there. You take a look behind Luca to see the man at a larger distance.

"Wouldn't think you'd just let him go like that." You raise an eyebrow at Luca, not in a teasing way, it just feels oddly out of character for him to just let him go.

"Because I ain't gonna." He turns to a seemingly unaware civilian reading a newspaper, mumbling something that sounds like Italian, his head only slightly motioning towards the direction in which the Brummie fled. Ah, one of his men, cousin maybe. Just as he left, Luca stopped him for just a second more. "Alive." He let him go.

"Look at you, my knight in shining armour." You smile up at him while catching your breath and trying to calm down.

"Yeah yeah." He doesn't play into your teasing this time. "You alright?" He rubs your upper arm as if dusting off any remaining trace of the event before.

"Just a bit roughed up, had it worse after playfighting with Ada back in the day." You shrug. "I was prepared for you to bash his head in right here."

"That can wait a few days." His gaze followed a pair of men dragging the attacker off the station, his voice almost a promise.

"A few days? What happened to the vengeful, impatient Luca I know?"

"This Luca-" He holds out his arm for you to take. "-Is going to starve him a bit before giving him the mercy of a pipe through his skull."

"How romantic." You sigh in an exaggerated, lovesick voice. "Talk more like that and maybe I'll lift the 'no shop talk' policy." You wink at Luca as you link your arms together, his shoulder becoming the perfect pillow for your head. This time, Luca welcomes it happily.

"How gracious of you." His low chuckle meets yours as you head off to the London center. A fun weekend out is due, after all.

Now, this was definitely an unusual location. 

At first, it seemed to you that Luca must have just confused locations when calling. Yet here you were, on the outskirts of a local forest, your only companions in the form of singing starlings and rustling trees.

All this seemed like a rope that was being pulled from only one side. You were the one to stress about being found out, evading family, hell, call sometimes. You felt like a brat, honestly. Technically, there was nothing Luca did that should have upset you, he couldn't have if there were no rules. Was that the thing though? Did you want there to be rules?

With every visit, you want to stay longer, talk more, and Luca seemed to entertain all of it. It confused you. What plan did he have with all this? Did Luca want you to catch feelings and lure you into a vulnerable state, resulting in killing you? Maybe he counted on you as a potential ally against Tommy, trying to manipulate you. Maybe he's just incredibly dense?

He can't want an actual relationship. Luca came here to kill your whole family, including you. The fact that he also likes to play with his prey is another thing, hell, he probably has a wife or girl back in New York. There has to be a wedding band under one of these tacky rings and signets.

"What the hell is he planning?" You kick a pebble down the dirt road in frustration. "A damn Picnic?" You finish off with a groan as you squat down.

Your answer came in the form of the sound of a Rolls Royce engine heading closer and closer toward you, the black car kicking up a hefty amount of dust and rocks. As it slows down next to you and ultimately comes to a halt, you see the familiar face of Luca's right-hand man.

"Get in." Matteo nodded in the direction of the backseat, though you didn't take it into consideration, and immediately headed for the shotgun seat.

"What is all this?" You look around the car as it backs up and starts speeding off in the same direction it came from.

"Luca asked me to get you to him safely," Matteo explained, not taking his eyes off the road. "He didn't want any uhh, repeat from last time."

"How sweet." You answer sarcastically. Ah, of course, he couldn't bother.

"He was definitely sweet when he put the bozo out of his misery." He laughed, looking to the side, as if seeking approval for his joke, but didn't get any. Matteo's laughter dies into an awkward cough.

"How long's the ride?" You try to position yourself as comfortably as possible in the stiff leather seats of the car.

"About an hour." He answers, and you visibly deflate in your seat, deciding to spend the time looking at the sights outside, fields, and occasional houses passing by.

A long, awkward silence passes between the two of you. It seemed to bother the man to your right, who tapped his index finger against the steering wheel while stealing the occasional glance. He looked like he was debating saying something.

"So..." He begins, almost like a father starting a conversation with a child he doesn't quite get. "Did you finish Ulysses yet?"

"Did..." You do a double take, studying Matteo for a long second. "...Did Luca give you conversation starters?"

"What if I made them up?" He blurts out.

"We've spoken twice, Matteo." You raise an eyebrow at him, arms crossed. "I never told you what I read."

"Maybe I just guessed what girls like nowadays." He smirked at you, feeling triumphant.

"I'm sorry, but you're the least qualified person to talk about girls." You say with a chuckle.

"Touche." He smiled, then looked back at the road, letting the silence sit only for a few seconds. "But you're right, we've only spoken twice."

"So?" You raised a brow.

"Sooo." Matteo draws out. "We have about an hour to catch up."

You're genuinely confused as to why Matteo was being so personal all of a sudden. Usually, as in, in the last few weeks or so, you've had two separate, short conversations with the man. Once, when you accidentally came into his room instead of Luca's during one of your 'visits'. The other time, when both of you had quite a boring and awkward conversation about English meals in a lift. "On what grounds should we 'catch up'?"

"On the grounds that you're fucking my cousin Miss Shelby." The way Matteo said that was surprisingly casual. "And family is important to me."

"It's not like I'm married to him." You reply faster than you'd want to.

"He damn well acts like you are." He chuckles, and you feel yourself stiffen, looking at the Italian like he just told you the earth is flat. "What? Why are you looking at me like that?"

"What do you mean by 'acts like I am'?" The question leaves your lips in an uncertain tone, almost shy.

"Never seen him so distracted by someone he's known for such a short time." He says with a shrug "Foolish if you ask me, but who am I to judge, at least he's happy."

He's happy??

"Uh, yeah." He throws you a pitiful smile, as if he could see how perplexed this information made you. "At least from what I can see."

Oh, of course, you said that out loud.

You quieted down, gaze resting on your lap. Now this was new information you had no idea how to process. You bit your lower lip in thought, unsure if the emotions you're feeling right now are uncertainty or... giddy, immature happiness.

You sit like that for a good few minutes before a small, sly smile graces your lips.

"Cousin, huh?" You ask, looking out the window, your good humour slowly creeping back in.

"I'm not telling you his secrets," Matteo says almost immediately as if he somehow knew that you were going to ask that.

"And I'm not asking you." You clarify. "But you probably have some nice stories."

"About what?"

"You knooooow..." You draw out, cocking your head to the side. "What was he like, back in the day?"

"Same as now, I guess. Only longer ago." It seemed like that was the end of your prying on Luca, but after a longer moment, Matteo mused more to himself than anyone else in the car. "More chipper in New York though..."

"Chipper? I'd like to see that."

"Oh yeah, and stupid."

"Now we're talking, tell me more." You lean forward in your seat, elbows resting on your thighs.

"No, I already told too much," Matteo says like he's telling his friends he's had enough drinks for the night. "He's going to skin me alive if he finds out I told you about this."

"Oh come oooooon. I won't tell." You shuffle your feet excitedly. Matteo looked forward, focusing on the road ahead, but after a moment of looking between the steering wheel and you, he let out a defeated sigh.

"...Back in New York, when we were just goons for Spinietta, Luca came up with a new con to scam people with, a really fucking stupid one..."

.

.

.

"And then, THEN it turned out the other guy was from London, and when he heard Luca speaking in a shitty Birmingham accent he-" He paused, but only to wheeze in laughter. "He beat the fucking shit out of him." Matteo finishes the story, on the verge of tears.

"No!" You gasped, though not hiding your laughter as well, leaning forward in your seat.

"Yes!" Matteo wipes a stray tear from the corner of his eye, still trying to calm down his laughter. "Never seen Luca on his ass faster in my life, ti giuro. "

"Oh god. And I'm supposed to NOT tease him about it?" You say in amused disbelief. "When he's all 'Look at me, I'm mister smug and aloof, I've never gotten beaten up like a bitch before'." You put on your best impression of the Italian, even going to the lengths of putting a match between your lips and exaggerating your words with excessive hand gestures.

"Hey, we're all hiding behind something principessa." Despite Matteo defending his cousin, he still couldn't help but laugh along with you. After a moment, both of you calmed down, this time falling into a pleasant, comfortable silence before you spoke up again.

"What about you?" You turned to Matteo again.

"What do you mean?"

"You said you want to catch up." You lean against the leather seat, bringing your knees to your chin. "We've got an hour, you ever played two truths and a lie?"

It was a nice ride.

Everyone and their mother thinks the Small Heath home is haunted. Random objects flying off the wall at night, specific items appearing in places they weren't before, the occasional crooked painting.

Footsteps are definitely new.

The boys and Polly are dealing with business outside of town for once, while Ada just went out and should be here any minute. But that definitely isn't Ada.

Slow, almost wary footsteps cause the floorboards to creak on the ground floor. You're sitting next to the stairs, knees tucked to your chest and spare pistol in your hand.

Another step.

You press your ear to the floor, trying your hardest to pinpoint how many people were inside just by footsteps... Just one?

They appear to be coming closer, and you internally brace for confrontation with whoever broke into your home. As the intruder passes the corner you were hiding in, you stick out the gun and press it to the side of their head, making them immediately freeze in place.

Wait-

"Luca????" You blurt out in shock, your voice becoming at least a few octaves higher.

"Hey, you actually kept it," Luca says, sizing up the gun he gave you that's now pressed to his head. "Though I'd rather not die by it sweetheart, no offense."

"FUCKING hell Luca! You scared me half to death!” Your arms drop next to your hips. putting the gun on a table nearby.

“Relax, who would it be if not me?” Luca moves towards you, probably to say his hellos in the form of peppered kisses.

"Who would it be? What do you MEAN who would it be?!" You rub your eyes, not sure if out of frustration or as a way of trying to wake yourself up. “Police? IRA? My own bloody brothers?!” Somehow, this is exactly what you wanted. Luca being the one that sneaks through Small Heath and avoids the blinders, instead of it being always you. Though now, instead of it being a late-night fantasy of the charming man sneaking into your bed despite the dangers of doing so, it's a real-life nightmare of this idiot trying to get himself killed.

“Yeah well, it’s not them.” He shrugs, glancing around the house. “I’d like to see anyone try to stab you in the back in this house. I figure before I’ll get to them you’ll just kill them yourself.” 

���Yes, I am quite amazing.” You muse to yourself before snapping back into reality. “Don’t think you can butter me up and I’ll drop it, what are you doing here?!"

“I’m seeing my doll.” 

“Need I remind you you’re inside my idiot brothers’ territory?”

"Relax, we'll manage."

You two did not manage.

Who knew Luca Changretta had a talent for knocking down hanged pictures and stepping on the creakiest parts of the wooden floor.

“Shush for once in your life.” You hissed at Luca as you led him through the tight corridor, internally begging whatever made-up deity may be watching over you to please not let Arthur or Polly magically appear out of the corner.

“Please, it’s not like-” You can practically hear Luca roll his eyes, and despite you usually letting him release whatever condescending thoughts he had on the daily, you think you just heard a door open in the distance. You practically drag him the remaining meter to your room's door and push him inside, shutting it way too loudly.

As it turns out, the deity listened to you, but only to half of your half-assed prayer.

“Ada! Heyy!” You try to stay nonchalant as you lean against the door.

“...Hey?” Ada's pace slows down next to you, “What’s got you so pent up?”

“Pent up? Pshh.” You're really not good at this. “Well, I guess I’m just tired, I better get to bed.” Your thumb points back towards the door of your bedroom.

Ada stays put, looking at you puzzled and suspicious.

“Are you going?" She asks.

“Yes.” You blurt out. ”What about you?”

“Y/N, cut the crap. I heard something.” She looks at you for answers, but only when she looks at the door again it's almost as if a light turns on in her head. “Are you…Sneaking someone in?” She reached for the doorknob only to be stopped by you slapping it away.

“Ada no!” You shield the door with your whole body.

“Ow! Hey, come on, I’m not judging. God knows you deserve some fun once in a while.” She rubs her hand. “So who is he?” Your sister looks between you and the door excitedly, her voice now hushed, like all these years ago when the two of you spent hours under the covers giggling about the stupidest of things.

“Uhh, just-” You stammered, struggling to find the right words. or any words for that matter. “You don’t know him.”

“I trust he’s not afraid of Tommy since he followed you here.” She threw a wink your way. “Reminds me of Freddie and I back in the day.” A fond smile graces her face as she looks to the side.

“Oh he’s not, that’s for sure.” You laugh nervously, internally waiting for the sweet release of death. Ada seemed to notice.

“All right, I’ll get out of your hair.” She laughs at her sister, squeezing your cheek as she walks past you. “Don’t get her knocked up Romeo, then maybe I won't have to tell Tommy!” She calls, walking off down the corridor. Only after Ada completely vanished from your periphery you opened the bedroom door just a few inches and slid in. The door locked, checked three times, and you finally released a big sigh, hands sliding off the door to rest next to your hips.

You turn around to see a very out-of-place Luca. Almost everything about him clashed with your small childhood room, the humble interior looking somehow even cheaper next to him. After the company took off, the family never bothered to fancy up the place, instead, everyone went their separate ways into apartments and stylish homes. Yet somehow for you, no king-sized plush bed will ever replace the old, creaking twin you have right here in Small Heath, always ready for you with open arms.

Luca took his sweet time taking in the place. Picking up and then putting down every insignificant object, from small toys you never bothered to throw out or sell, to numerous books lying around the room. He spends the most time looking at an old, framed picture sitting atop your windowsill. Luca's thumb brushes off a heavy layer of dust from 10-year-old Y/N in her year 5 uniform, while the actual Y/N takes her place beside him, leaning her head on his shoulder.

"Adorable." Luca nudges you, a sly smile on his lips as he puts his other arm around your shoulders.

"Oh hush, I'm sure I can find a picture of little Luca if I sneak into your home." You stab a finger into his arm playfully, smiling fondly at the picture.

"Wishful thinking, doll. Wishful thinking..." Luca sets down the frame and focuses his attention on you. A kiss on your temple leads to his lips softly trailing down to your nose and meeting your lips. Now the stress of the whole damn ordeal seemed to start slipping away, and the sweet taste is there once again.

The sound of a door crashing on the far end of the hallway takes both of you out of your trance.

“So, that…was Ada.” You turn your head to try and hear any sounds of your sister leaving her room, but Luca doesn't seem to pay it any mind.

“She seems nice.” He hummed against your skin, his lips trailing down to your collarbone, biting down gently.

“What are you doing Romeo?” You turn your head slightly to squint your eyes at him, a distrusting smile gracing your lips.

“Breaking my promise to your sister.” His sly drawl is muffled against your skin as both of you step by step head towards the bed.

“Did you want to come here only to sleep with me under Tommy’s nose?” You sit down on the bed, your brows furrowing.

“I always come firstly to you and because of you,” Luca emphasizes every word as he slowly gets on his knees, never taking his eyes off you. “But yeah, being here does come with its satisfaction. If only they’d see you now, cara.” His hands push up your dress, finding their way to your thighs, fingers getting busy with the garters holding up your stockings.

“Yeah, maybe cut it with the Italian. My sister could be listening in.” Luca only seems to respond in a musing hum. “You never know.” 

“Should I put on my best Birmingham accent?” He looks up at you, his signature smartass grin more endearing than annoying.

“Not now. You’ll ruin the mood.” You murmur just mere inches from his lips, laying back into the old, creaky bed, Luca following put. “But definitely save it for later, I need to hear that."

[misguidedasgardian]

Blurred Lines (4)

4. Positions

MASTERLIST

Summary:  You are placed in an… awkward position

Warnings: Cursing, cheating, adultery, Harwin is not a good person on this… and Jace isn’t either, a bit creepiness, alcohol consumption, inappropriate relationship, sexual innuendos, a bit choking, smut, fingering, a bit of humilliation, might miss some warnings

MINORS DNI, + 18

Wordcount: 3.2 k

Notes: Thank you anon who gave me this amazing idea!! love you, and I hope this did justice to what you had in mind! this might open the door to other stories in this AU

It’s been a chaotic week to say the least. Harwin had been staying home, but thanks to Jace, he didn’t have much to do around the house, it’s been like three days since Jace left and even though you appreciated that, to think… he had always make himself present 

Harwin was trying… hard…

First to speak to you, but luckily, having a toddler required a lot of work so she was a good buffer, so when he could tell you were not going to hear him out, he started staring at you when you were in the same room… when he walked by you he would graze you, when he wanted something that was near you he made sure to touch you to move you out of the way gently…

And it was driving you mad

You didn’t want him near you…

Not only because it disgusted you, the fact that he fucked someone else, the fact that you saw him when that bitch send you videos and pictures and the nasty conversation between them, buT also… you were disgusted in yourself

You had fucked his son…

And the worst part is that at night when you were tossing and turning, you weren’t feeling guilty, you were feeling annoyed that Harwin was the “Strong” in the house and not Jacaerys

And that made you disgusted in yourself

Lucky for you, Harwin, in a way to consolidate with you, called your name softly as you were having breakfast on opposite sides of the dinner table, telling you he had an interview out of the city in the Headquarters for another company

And then you could breathe, and count the seconds left until he leaves

Will you call Jacaerys?

No, impossible

Were you wishing he had that incredible timing of his again?

Maybe

You shook your head, trying to eliminate those thoughts from your head

The furthest Jace stayed from you the better…

Specially now

But soon, Harwin’s week of having his kids  came around again, and of course, Jace was coming, he wouldn’t miss it for the world 

You tried to act as natural as possible, again, your daughter helped as a shield

Seeing him there, as nothing had happened, made you question your own reality, you felt yourself embarrassingly wet between your thighs as soon as you saw him, dirty memories of what you had done together came rushing back and you would be lying to yourself if you didn’t want it to happen again… 

Now you had two men with longing looks in their eyes and hoping to get you alone for a second, and you wouldn’t give in, you couldn’t

Luckily, Luke and Joffrey were there too, those sweet boys were helping you too, they seemed to be happy to be back and see you, you loved them… perhaps, no as your children, but as your youngest siblings 

So the third day, when Harwin was out for a work interview, Jace approached you while you were preparing lunch, you jumped on your feet as Luke was right in the living room playing in his nintendo witch with headphones on

“Relax”, he laughed

“It’s not funny Jace”, you whispered as he mocked your reaction

“I wanted to ask you something”, he whispered, his stance was relaxed, not second intended, or you didn’t think so

“Tell me”, you said

“I wanted to invite you to my birthday party, the one that my grandfather Viserys is throwing me”, he said softly. You looked at him, looking for something that tells you he was kidding, or he had a hidden intention, but those beautiful, dark green eyes told you nothing

“Jace I think it’s out of place”, you said finally

“Look, no funny business, it is a family thing, I want Aerea there, and Harwin can’t take her because he's going to that interview out of the city…”

“I’m not sure if its a good idea”

“It is my birthday, And I want you and Aerea there, I would only take her, but because it’s a weekend we won’t have nannies and I…”

“You are the birthday boy”, you said, “you shouldn’t be taking care of a toddler”

“Please go”, he said softly

“It’s going to be awkward”, you whispered

“No it won’t”

“But I’m not blood related to anyone there…”

“Well Aerea is”, he suggested

“That only makes me remember what I’ve done”, you whispered

“The only thing you have done is let yourself be loved by me”, he whispered, leaning in, but you took a step back, looking at Luke who couldn’t even be bothered 

“I’ll go, if you promise me… please, nothing out of line”, you begged softly

“I promise”, he whispered

He wasn’t an idiot… he was testing the waters with his family and even though he needed to show you to them in a more… intimate… way, he had to keep his hands to himself… at least in front of everyone 

He had won this small victory

The weekend came around

He was turning twenty two but that is not what most excited him

It was you

He had come early to his grandfather’s house, where he was going to spend the weekend, and so were you and the rest of his family, including his mother

He was so looking forward to it.

His grandfather’s house was the Targaryen family home, and he wouldn’t be lying if he said it was a castle, a huge castle in the middle of a national park

He heard a car pulling up so he sneaked a glance through the window, and there you were, struggling to get Aerea out of the car, with a bag hanging from your shoulder and your adorable toddler in the other

You were going to struggle even more when you are fat with his child, Jace thought with a silly smile

Of course the house was in the outskirts, so the invitation also included a room in the mansion for the weekend

Oh Gods he was going to enjoy it

You were nervous, as Area looked around moving tirelessly in your arms, there was so much to see though

This was like a medieval castle, incredible that had passed through generations and generations of Targaryens

You received a warm welcome from the family, even from Rhaenyra

“Who is this gorgeous little girl?”, she cooed at Aerea and even threw her arms at her, you felt embarrassed but she immediately received her in her arms. “She is gorgeous!”, she praised at you, “Like the daughter I never had”, she said with a sad smile

“Thank you for inviting me Rhaenyra, Jace wanted his baby sister here”, you said softly

“Please, say no more, you are family”, she said again regaining her smile, as Aerea played with her earring softly, “anything you need, ever, I mean it, you only have to ask”, she said and smiled at you, you smiled back

She and Harwin ended amicably, she was the one to end things and he accepted it with a bit of reluctance. They split everything they had, shared custody 50/50, everything was great, very evolved. 

You came back to the present when Jace himself met you with open arms and those eyes that seemed to want to eat you alive, you almost cringed away… 

“There you are!, I’m so happy you are here”, he said it playfully, looking at Aerea who instantly throw her arms at Jace

“Daddy!”, she called and your mouth opened in an o, you looked at Rhaenyra, who chuckled, smiling warmly

“They are so close”, you said apologetically

“Jace had been telling me what has happened lately”, you wanted the earth to swallow you, “and how he likes to be there helping you out around the house”, she almost whispered at you, only you two could hear, “its perfectly fine that Aerea looks at him like a father figure, children are… simpler than we are”, she said with a warm smile

Rhaenyra was certainly something else

They had invited you for the weekend, they showed you your rooms, Aerea was set in the nursery, yes, the house had a nursery, with Rhaenyra’s children who shared her age, and you had a room all to yourself

The nannies were taking care of the children, and dinner time, the adult dinner time, was above you sooner than you ever expected. 

You felt watched the entire dinner, and not only by Jace, but you found his uncles staring at you, Aemond and Aegon, the first hiding his smirk in his goblet of wine, afterwards licking his lips teasingly, and the other didn’t even mind hiding it

You wondered why

But you felt so judged, did they know? as the wine flowed more freely, you became more paranoid, but it was impossible

If they knew then everyone knew, and your would have not been welcomed here if it was the case, Rhaenyra was a fierce woman she would have stabbed you with that knife her father Viserys was using to carve into a chicken

Luckily Rhaenyra kept you entertained and distracted, along with Daemon, their conversation was light, and seemed like a godsent 

Viserys stood up, raising his cup

“I wanted to celebrate my eldest grandson, reaching this magical age of twenty two”, he said raising his cup, “for him, and for his achievements, I know there are going to be more of them”, everyone cheered, raising his cups and Jace smiled at everyone 

He raised from his seat then, his own cup in his hands

“Thank you grandfather”, he said solemnly, “this means a lot to me, one thing that I’ve understood the last years, is that family is everything, and I can’t wait to have my own”, he said the last part looking at you, and you tried to hide your ashamed face in your own cup

Daemon chuckled

“You might be getting ahead of yourself”, he warned with amusement

“No when you know what you want”, Rhaenyra seemed proud of his words, and she nodded enthusiastically, you knew she had him when she was nineteen, same as Harwin, she was young herself. “I’m fortunate to have you all here, as you mean so much to me”

The next one to raise from her seat was Rhaenyra herself

“To my oldest son”, she said with her voice on a knot, “can’t believe you are already twenty two!, you are a grown man now… I’m so proud of you”, it was a heartfelt sentiment and you smiled at her, she looked down and smiled at you too

For a second, for a fraction of a second, you thought you were actually here with Jace and not for him, and the realization that you weren’t brought you a dark sentiment you hid in a sip of wine.

Gods…

His were on you, as you made conversation with Rhaenyra and Daemon, even though you were technically still in your twenties, as many of the group, you felt the need to cling to the second generation instead of the third

“I’m sorry, lovely lady, I must have forgotten your name”, Aegon, you thought he was called, demanded your attention and you got nervous all of a sudden, you were about to answer, but someone answered for you

“She is (y/n)”, said Jacaerys, quick to anger

“I’m sorry nephew, I asked her”, teased Aegon. Jacaerys was quickly exasperated, “Her name, and her reason to be here, scapes me”

“I wanted her here”, he said angrily, and now the rest of the family was strangely quiet, Daemon looked at everything with a mocking grin on this face… Viserys tried to eat his chicken, but looked at everything with a strange look on his face… and Rhaenyra and Alicent looked at everything unravel with surprised looks on their faces

“You are so forgetful brother, she is Harwin’s new little wife”, muttered Aemond, in a voice so condescending it made your skin crawl

“Right”, said Aegon, like now he remembered you, “aren’t you closer to our age than his?”

“Aegon, that’s enough”, chided Alicent again

“They say that love is ageless”, muttered Daemon

“They are separated now”, said Jace

“Well, that is better! thank you Jacaerys for bringing such a welcome addition”, kept teasing Aegon

You shouldn’t have come 

Aegon was staring at you trough the rest of the dinner with a smirk on his lips, Aemond was more discrete.

You felt like they knew what you and Jace had done just by looking at your guilty face, only one look and they would know how depraved you were, pretending you did nothing, siting here by Jace’s mother.

Aemond stood up then, raising his cup 

“Final tribute”, he chanted, “For Jacaerys, you are a man grown now, that knows what he wants and is not afraid to go after it”, he said, looking straight at you

“Thank you uncle”, said Jacaerys, “that was very kind”, he said trough gritted teeth

It seemed like he wanted to say something else, but he kept quiet, You looked to your right, and Rhaenyra was looking right back at you, and smiled warmly

“It’s alright”, she said, and you didn’t know why it sounded so strange to you

You looked back at Jace and he just smirked

Gods, you should have never come to this thing, Aerea wouldn’t even remember this, Jacaerys was just playing with you

Did he get off just… putting you in this position? what was he thinking? Did he wanted to humiliate you?

What did he wanted to accomplish?

You didn’t know what to feel or think. 

Despite Daemon’s invitation for a late drink with Rhaenyra, you had politely declined, and your daughter was already asleep, and you were so tired and tense, you decided you were going to follow, and went back to your own room to sleep

But as soon as you were comfortable inside the sheets, the door opened slowly, you turned quickly, and even in the darkness, but the only light coming from the hallway, you could tell, it was Jace

“What are you doing?”, you asked, he closed the door behind him and sneaked into the room

“Getting my birthday present”, he teased walking towards the room

“Jace, don’t”, you wanted but he was already taken off his shirt

“Its still my birthday”, he purred, you sat on the bed, the sheets barely hiding your body dressed in your night dress

“Not here”, you begged

“Where else? everyone else is busy or asleep”, he begged, his hands, even in the dark, found your cheeks, “come on”, he leaned in and trapped your lips with his.

“Jace, why did you invited me here?”, you asked him, leaning into him, it was useless to resist him, you wanted him too

“Isn’t it obvious?”, he teased, he sneaked onto the bed with you 

“Jace please”

“Its my fucking birthday and you are my present, that’s why you are here”, you only moaned when he put you on your side, he at your back

“Tell me…”

“Shut up”, he growled making you whimper, his hand encased your throat, threatening to squeeze, but he didn’t, “tonight you are my perfect little whore”, he whispered, his other hand sneaking between your thighs, “I want to unwrap my present”

“Jace I think”

“I don’t want you to think…”, and all thoughts went to shit when he fingers teased you open, even though you had closed your thighs, it was a stretch even for his thick fingers, “I want you to take my fingers, then my cock”

“Jace!”, you schreeched when his fingers found that spot inside of you

“Shut up, if you don’t want everyone in this house to know the slut you really are”, he threatened, and that only made you moan, spreading your legs to give him more access, he squeezed your neck softly, in warning

He grabbed your leg and hooked it over his, so now he had you all open for him

You were quickly wet with desire for him, the sounds of your wetness resounding all over the room. 

Your climax built quickly…

The very thought of being roughly treated like that turned you on, the fact that you were in such dangerous territoy was even more hot to you in that moment, so you began bucking your hips to meet his fingers.

“Mmmm that’s it”, he could be cruel, he could take your orgasm from you, for trying to deny him, for resisting, but tonight he wasn’t feeling like that, tonight he wanted to make you cum as much times as he could, that is what his real present was.

You came undone on his fingers, drowning your moans and whines on the pillow under you, which Jace really appreciated, this was not how he intended on presenting you as his partner

“Youa re suh a good girl for me”, he whispered in your ear, “tell me, who makes you cum like this?”

“You”, you whined, as he retrieved his hand from you gently

“Say it again”, he demanded

“Only you Jace, you are the only one who makes me cum like this”, you admitted 

“That’s it”, he said, pleased, his fingers came back, this time more aggressively, more teasingly, he did not want to deprive you of anything, but what he really wanted to do was to hear you beg for him.

“Jacey”, you whined, again bucking your hips so needily it mad ehim chuckle, squeezing softly your delicate neck

“Yes?”, he asked, giving you an open mouth kiss on the side of your face, 

“I need you”

“What you are talking about? I’m right here”, he kept teasing

“I need your cock”, you revealed, and he couldn’t hide his chuckle

“Where?”, he kept teasing he loved hearing your voice, but he liked it even more when you were begging for him

Not like he could last any longer without fucking you, his cock had never been harder on his life 

“Inside me”, tonight you were not in the mood for teasing he could see.

“Oh I see, my little slut”, he mocked, he released you, making you cry out and then he, “you need me to fuck you, uh?”, his thumb billied your clit making you whine, trying so hard not to scream his name in ecstasy.

“Yes I do”, you admitted shameslely

“Oh I will give it to you then”, he teased, releasing you, grabbing his cock, and thent easing your entrance, “Mmmm but just the tip?”, you tried to sink yourself onto him, but he had fisted his cock making it impossible, only his fat tip teasing you

“No”, you whined

“No what?”

“All of it”, you begged, wiggling your ass, “please I want all of it”

“You needy little girl”, he moaned in your ear, and from one second to the next he impaled you on his fat cock, covering your mouth so nobody could hear you

Jace never knew nothing better that being inside you

“This cock is yours”, he promised against the skin of your cheek, “I’m goona fuck you so good you know nothing but my name, and I’m going to cum inside you, fucking breed you”

“Mmm?”, you were so deep in your pleasure his words barely made sense, they just made you wetter

“Fuck yes”, he retrieved himself, only to thrust inside you again, rougher, deeper, “I’m going to breed you, get you pregnant with my child”

“Jace?”, that did sink in, but late, as he growled cumming deep inside of you.

But you payed no attention to it, it was surely a thing of the heat of the moment, nothing else, many had a breeding kink, you amongst them

“In my grandparent’s home”, he whispered, “dirty little whore”, he growled

“Happy birthday Jace”, you said only, the spell fading, as he chuckled in your neck

Oh if only you knew… they you were being watched

Reader thinks Jace only wants her to fuck :(

Taglist: @champomiel @urmomsgirlfriend1 @sweethoneyblossom1 @lukepattersin @ladylyanna91 @snowflake-latte @bruher @bellstwd @inesven @iamavailablesstuff @haydee5010 @happinessinthebeing @agqrtz @ajanauia @joliettes @lightdragonrayne @ivoryluvs @fairysluna @cumslutforaemond @possiblyafangirl

[catt-leya]

no bc what about rick having an internal battle bc he doesn’t know how to tell you that he finds you just so hot. like he fantasizes about you nearly every day.

i don’t wanna be too specific so that you can let your imagination fly 😫 i just know the man would feel so dirty after he finishes,, like so guilty

Dirty (18+) || Rick Grimes

I am so sorry Anon 💓

I had the fic ready for a while, but never posted it.

Let's see how regularly I will post soon, but the requets I have, I will of course work off one by one.

I hope you enjoy reading it, even if it's not my best work 💓

Trigger: dirty talk (of course), age gap (no one is a minor!)

You wipe the sweat from your forehead and look over at Maggie, who is lifting the next post with Rick.

In the last few days, the walkers outside the prison fences have been increasing in number, so Rick has asked you and Maggie to help him put up the wooden posts.

Sighing, you bend over and grab the next piece of wood, not noticing how Rick's gaze wanders to your butt and for a few seconds he just stares at you before he catches himself staring and turns his head back to Maggie a little too violently.

Again and again, he faints and lapses into daydreams that include you. Preferably naked and under himself.

But what keeps him from trying anything is your age.

Of course, theoretically you would be old enough and in itself it would be nothing reprehensible, but he simply does not want to cross the line and therefore holds back.

Every time you get close to him, which is not uncommon because you are a very open person who doesn't shy away from physical contact, he pulls himself together and tries to treat you like any other member in your group, even though he would love to rip your clothes off.

What he doesn't know is that you are purposefully seeking physical contact with him.

Ever since you first saw him in his boots and worn shirt, you've been completely smitten with him, making an effort to be close to him without seeming pushy.

Mainly because you think that he sees you anyway only as a little girl who is too young to tease him in any way.

What's good for both of you is that you get along really well, even though neither of you know that the other wants more.

That's why you pick up the log with a groan and call out to Rick, "Okay, I'm really not going to heave this thing to the fence by myself, Rick."

You feel him close behind you before he replies, "Wait."

Rick walks past you and lifts the other side, taking some of the weight off of you and you smile openly at him.

You're standing directly across from each other and Rick can't help but let his gaze slide over your beautiful face, which must be slightly heated from the physical labor, and he follows the beads of sweat that form on your forehead and slowly slide down your cheek over your neck and then to the hollow between your collarbones before they sinfully disappear between your breasts and he wishes he could kiss you right there.

You watch his eyes lower to your breasts and notice heat rising inside you.

With each breath, your breasts lift slightly and he stares so intently at your cleavage that it feels like he's looking through your top and you notice your nipples stiffen.

Because you're still holding the wooden stake between you and Rick, you can't cover your breasts any more, and because you've gone without a bra, you're sure he can see your nipples clearly through the top.

In fact, he's a bit surprised when he can see the hard tips and is almost ashamed to say that he would give a lot to take them between his teeth and show you how sensitive your breasts can be.

Swallowing hard, he wants to look you in the face again, when a shrill scream echoes from one of the cell blocks and you both drop the wood at the same time.

Hectically you turn to Maggie, who doesn't hesitate for a second and runs to the cells, closely followed by Rick. Briefly you look to the fence and follow the two.

On the way, Rick has overtaken Maggie and rushes to the cells, closely followed by her. You're about to head for the door when a little girl runs out and straight for you.

Panicked, she babbles something to herself and you drop to your knees to calm her down a bit, "Shhhh, it's okay. It's going to be okay."

Again you look at the door but no one comes out and the screams get quieter and quieter.

Worrying that something has happened to your friends and you weren't there to stop anything.

You have no idea how long you hold the little girl in your arms, when the first people come out of the building with their eyes widened in fear and a young woman comes running towards you and the girl.

Fiercely, she pulls the girl into her arms and whispers, "You're okay. Thank heaven."

Now that you no longer have a job to do you can't help but stare at the people from the building, anxiously waiting for Rick to return.

People are falling into each other's arms and tears are being shed, only you are pacing.

As everyone comes out, you don't dare go in and stand a little apart to get a better view.

The group of people slowly disperses and you curse softly, "Shit."

Just as you decide to go into the building and see for yourself what happened inside, the door swings open and Rick comes out followed by Daryl and Maggie.

Without much thought you sprint in his direction and as his eyes fall on you, he says, "You might want to keep your distance."

But you couldn't care less about his words, so you fall around his neck at the top of your lungs.

Surprised by your reaction, he staggers back a few steps and catches himself before you can both topple backwards, wrapping his arms rather hesitantly around your waist.

Rick can't describe how happy he was to see that you didn't crash into the cell block with him and all tension now falls from his shoulders as he feels your body against his.

Your whole body shakes and he pulls you even closer to him, "Hey, I'm fine."

His voice is soft in your ears and you just bury your nose harder into his chest, turning him on more than it should in this situation.

He looks up from you and his gaze meets Daryl's, who raises an eyebrow questioningly, but Rick just nods slightly, which Daryl takes as a sign that everything is fine as far as it can be in this situation and walks with Maggie to what is currently the only safe cell block.

Rick's attention is taken over by you again, as you whisper softly through his chest: "I thought something had happened to you. You haven't come out in so long."

He can't help a smile forming on his face as he hears your concern. Especially since you've only fallen for his neck and no one else's.

Also, he would be lying if he didn't also admit that he has an extreme physical reaction to you. The way your soft breasts press against his torso and your arms are wrapped tightly around him.

Gently, he pushes his hips away from you a little so you don't notice HOW excited he is about your embrace and murmurs, "Sorry you had to wait so long."

At his words, your breathing slowly calms and you move away from him a bit so you can look him in the face and nod, "Okay. What happened anyway?"

Calmly, Rick describes to you what happened in the cells and neither of you think about the fact that you're still in each other's arms.

After Rick finishes, you gently disengage from his embrace and clear your throat, "Sorry, I know you can take care of yourself."

Silently, you look at each other for a few seconds and you can tell Rick is struggling with what words to choose before he hesitantly opens his mouth, "I don't mind. I...like it."

Surprised by his confession, you blink several times before biting your lower lip lightly and nodding.

Rick tries to take in every reaction from you and doesn't take his eyes off you as you take a small step back and ask, "You like it when I touch you?"

He didn't say it verbatim but you hit it well, so he nods, "Yeah."

You can practically grab the tension between you and you're tense to the max as you reach out your small hand compared to his large one and nervously place it on his chest, "Like here?"

Rick looks down at your hand and exhales an agonized breath as he thinks of where your hand would look much better.

He can't gauge what you're up to and asks in a raspy voice, "What are you doing?"

Shakily you exhale and let your hand slide feather light to his flat stomach, "I just want to know where to touch you."

The brief time you thought something might have happened to him has pulled the rug out from under you and you're desperate to know how far you can go after he really doesn't seem averse.

You just can't hide the fact that your hand is shaking slightly, and Rick takes a quick look around. When he doesn't spot anyone in the immediate vicinity, he takes your hand from his stomach and pulls you behind him into a small room nearby.

You stumble after him and are gently pushed against the door by him before he says softly, "You don't have to worry about me leaving and whatever short-circuit reaction you had earlier, just forget about it."

Now you realize that he didn't bring you here to fuck you, but so that he wouldn't have to tell you to get him out of your head in front of any witnesses.

You're thankful that there are no windows in the room and therefore it's so dark that he can't see your cheeks, which are flushed with shame.

You could have sworn that he really enjoyed your closeness, so you murmur shamefully, "If you don't want me to touch you, please let me go."

At that moment, you just want to be as far away from him as possible, but he blocks you with his body and growls softly, "You've got me all wrong. Shit, I'd give a lot to have you jerk me off, but I shouldn't want that."

Immediately he notices you stiffen and regrets his unfiltered words, but before he can salvage what needs to be salvaged, you purposefully place your hand on his belt, "I'm curious about the explanation of why you shouldn't want me to shove my hand down your pants right now, though."

At your words, Rick shifts toward your hand more out of reflex than intent and sighs softly, "What are you, 20? 21? It just feels dirty to look at you that way and want you."

Rick is teetering along the edge of his self-control as you thoughtfully run the flat of your hand over his belt buckle and lean your head against the door to face him in the dim darkness, "I'm 22."

Confused, he furrows his eyebrows, "What?"

You release your hand from his belt and he already thinks you're going to ask him to make room for you now, but you place your hands on his left and right arm, propped up next to your head, and slowly travel up his forearms to his strong upper arms and then to his neck to intertwine your fingers in his curls before answering: "You did guess how old I am and that's why I'm telling you I'm 22 and that's why there's nothing wrong with you getting hard thinking about me or fucking me until I can't moan anything but your name, Rick. "

Hearing his name from your lips, escaping you like a soft sigh, makes him moan softly and you know you've got him almost where you want him, which is why you kick it up a notch and purr, "Don't you want to ruin me? Feel my soft body under your palms and grab me so hard that I'll be walking around marked by you for the next few days. I bet you're incredibly turned on by the age difference, and you'd just love to know what it's like to be so deep inside me that I can't think straight, wouldn't you?"

You can see exactly when he's caving in and can't hold back anymore. It's just a slight change in his eyes and you know you're getting what you wanted when he leans in slightly and growls, "You want it hard?"

Your heart hammers in your chest as you bring out hoarsely, "Yes, please."

The door presses coldly against your back as he bridges the small distance and presses his lips firmly to yours and you close your eyes, fluttering.

It's been a while since you've kissed a man, but I guess it's like never forgetting how to ride a bike. Intuitively, you know what to do and push up on your toes so Rick doesn't have to lean down so far.

The kiss is hard and passionate, as if Rick is putting all of his desire that has been building up over all this time into the kiss and you are trying to show him that as well.

Because he's still not really touching you and is still leaning against the door behind you, you take advantage of the moment and press yourself firmly against him, then turn him so that he's leaning against the door with his broad back and looks down at you in surprise.

Rick has never thought of you as a weak woman, of course you are physically inferior to him, but that has never prevented you from standing up to him, but the fact that you suddenly take control in the foreplay surprises him, even though he should perhaps have expected it after your little speech earlier.

He can't take his eyes off you as you move your small hands from his neck to his chest and you slowly lower yourself to your knees in front of him.

You feel his irregular heartbeat under your palms before you continue to look into his beautiful blue eyes and your hands come to rest on his belt buckle again.

Slowly you pull the belt out of the buckle and pull his pants including boxers to just below his hipbones to breathe a light kiss on them.

The light and innocent touch of your lips so close to his twitching cock almost makes Rick lose control and he reaches into your hair, making you laugh softly, "Is this how you imagined it?"

Rick's head falls forward a little, causing some curls to hang in his face as he brings out in a clenched voice, "Better than I imagined."

Gently, you pull his pants completely off, trying not to swallow hard when you see how big he actually is, licking your lips instead to get ready.

Your eyes are focused on the task in front of you, but you can feel Rick's eyes boring into your face.

The trembling in his hands also gives him away: he wants you a lot more than he'd admit.

As he watches you take him inch by inch in your mouth, he really has to pull himself together not to fuck you in the mouth until tears would be in your eyes.

The image of you on your knees in front of him drills into his memory and he knows very well that he will never be able to think of anything other than your warm wet mouth the next time he jerks himself off.

Gently you do what you think is right and elicit a rough moan from Rick.

As you look up, his head leans against the door behind him and his hands push you further toward him at the back of your head that you take more than before into your mouth.

It gives you pure satisfaction that you can make him moan your name and press your legs together to help yourself somehow as well.

Your hands move to his strong thighs and your eyes fall closed as you think of his thighs being squeezed between yours.

Briefly, you are blown away as Rick grabs you tighter by your hair and forces you to let go of him and lets him pull you up.

Swaying, you stand in front of him and his hot gaze lingers on your swollen lips, "Do you want me?"

Without hesitation, you nod your head vigorously and he pulls your head back towards him and kisses you on the lips.

Everything that has been fades into the background for Rick and he slowly pushes you further and further back.

He grabs your thighs and moans, "Jump."

You do as he asks and wrap your legs around his narrow waist.

Without breaking the kiss, he carries you to a small table in a corner and gently lowers you onto it before reaching for your waistband and you wordlessly lift your hips so he can remove your pants and panties.

Your whole body trembles as his warm hands glide over your bare skin and he can't believe you are responding to him like this.

You feel so small and soft in his hands, and in all his life he's felt this way about a woman as the moment your hands move to the buttons of his shirt and you undo one button at a time.

As you reach the bottom, he brushes the shirt off his shoulders and leans forward slightly to whisper in your ear, "Spread your legs for me."

As confident and cocky as you were before, it's all gone now and you whimper softly as the cold air brushes your damp center as you open your thighs for him to stand between.

His body seems so wide and masculine between your legs, making you feel fragile at the way he towers over you.

You must be looking at him in a certain way, because he tilts his head slightly and asks, "Is something wrong?"

He snaps you out of your thoughts and you ask hoarsely, "What?"

His big warm hands come to rest on your thighs as he says, "You're looking at me in a very unusual way."

He does speak to you, but as he does, he lets his hands move higher and higher and every thought in your head becomes absorbent cotton, causing you to speak too freely, "You're so...manly."

His right hand moves between your legs and he laughs, "Manly?"

You realize how ridiculous it sounds, but his fingers play lightly at the dampness between your legs and because of that, you just nod and push your hips toward him for more.

Shivering, you close your eyes and whimper softly, "Yeah, is one reason why I'm so...attracted to you."

"Hmmm." His head lowers a little to your face, "I'll just take that as a compliment now."

Your lips part to say something back, but at that exact moment he slides a finger inside you and your forehead falls to his shoulder.

That's all he does, and you sigh shakily, "Please."

His touch is killing you, but it's still just not enough.

You notice how his chest rises and falls before he growls, "Isn't it enough?"

Greedily, you wrap your arms around his neck and move closer, "God, no. More, please."

Gently, he pulls his finger back a little and then slides a second one inside you with it. The stretch makes you see stars at first and he murmurs, "If you ask me so sweetly."

Finally, he moves his fingers just as you need them to and cradles your hips further against his hand.

The hand that is free he places on your neck and presses your face firmly against him.

Your lips are pressed against his neck as a result and you take the opportunity to suck on it.

You lick over his pulse and you quickly realize that the hotter you make him, the more intensely he fingers you.

Extremely questionable sounds slip over your lips and he presses your face even tighter against him as he gasps, "That's good. Your pussy is so wet and all this just for me."

His name slips from your lips and you realize you're just one move away from cumming on his fingers, but right then he pulls them out and pulls you away from him by the nape of your neck.

Speechless, you stare at him, unable to believe that he has denied you your orgasm, especially as he looks down at you with extreme satisfaction and smiles cockily, "Is there a problem?"

Your lips open and close again and again before you choke out, "You can't just stop."

He lifts his hand, licks his fingers, and grins, "And how I can."

Briefly, your gaze slides to his neck on which the mark you gave him is already visible before you push your bottom lip forward far too tearfully and he immediately stares at your pout.

Before you can say anything else, he leans forward and presses his mouth hard on yours.

He takes you completely and you no longer know where is above and below.

The surface beneath you must already be glistening with moisture as he softly breathes against your lips, "I want you to cum on my cock. That's why I stopped."

His way of talking to you is new and fucking exciting and you can only whimper softly at his crude words.

Rick sees every reaction you have to his words and really has to hold back as he pulls you to the edge as gently as he can and wraps his warm hands around your thighs to wrap around his bare hips before whispering, "You think you can stay like this?"

Your eyes mirror the joyful gleam of his own, and in response you pull him further toward you with your legs so that you feel his cock right at your entrance and your insides tighten around nothing.

Rick can only hope that you don't realize how blatant you are turning him on and how many times he has imagined completely sinking into you.

Perhaps a little too impatiently, he places a hand in the small of your back and moans as he thrusts into you in his fluid motion, "This is so fucking hot."

Never has a man filled you as much as Rick does at this moment, and you stare at him with huge eyes as he takes a shaky breath, unable to believe that he actually desires you like this.

Without much thought, you pull his face to you by the nape of his neck and kiss him blindly with desire.

Rick takes it as permission to finally move inside you like he's always wanted and thrusts into you one more time, only harder and much more desperate.

You are both unable to kiss anymore, so he just presses his nose against yours and swallows every whimper and moan from you.

Your legs are wrapped convulsively around his waist and the closer Rick gets to his own release, the bolder he feels.

The thought of coming right inside you and marking you as his shouldn't feel as good as it does to him right now.

Somewhere in the back of his mind, he feels so incredibly guilty about fucking a young woman like you senseless, because that's exactly what he's holding in his arms right now.

You're so close to your orgasm that you can barely hold yourself up and keep begging him to take you harder and telling him how good he feels.

You're practically hanging in his arms and he realizes how his heart skips a beat at the sight of you. How you give yourself completely to him and trust him.

It goes beyond the purely physical and before he can think about it further, he presses a heated kiss on your lips and gasps harshly, "Do you realize how deep I am inside you. I'd love to stay right there forever."

The control of your words slips away and you whimper, "Then do it."

You're not even really aware of your words, but Rick perceives them correctly and wouldn't have thought that those very words would make him twitch inside of you and he quickly reaches between you.

It only takes a brief touch to make you come around him, giving him his end.

Never in his life has Rick come so quickly and violently as he has inside you, and never has he felt the need to hold the woman in his arms afterwards and stroke the sweaty strands of her hair.

You're the first.

You feel like your body is no longer obeying you as you lie limp and deeply satisfied in Rick's arms, taking in his smell of wood and the soap he uses.

His body is so nice and wide and it feels like he can protect you from anything and everything.

Rick's eyes are locked on you and as forbidden and dirty as it may have felt, he doesn't regret it one bit.

Especially since he doesn't even want to imagine how you would experience it with another man than him.

Just the thought that another man could touch you the way he touched you makes him sick and at that moment it clicks in his head.

Now he can feel guilty because it's not just a physical thing for him. Not just sex.

He has a crush on a woman who could be his daughter.

Involuntarily, a "fuck" slips from his lips and you murmur softly against his chest, "What is it?"

At your soft and satisfied voice, his heart skips a beat again and he knows he's really fucked.

@positive-squid @hail-yourselves @mrsxreeves

[celaenaeiln]

you know whats even more insane tho? is that dick’s desire to be independent stems from the fact that he wants to be taken in as equal again by bruce—like yes he does feel restricted and hurt and suffocated by the insane amount of controlling that bruce did/do, but also hes equally as unhealthy as bruce bcs he sees that as bruce not considering him to be an equal anymore, that he doesnt trust him as much anylonger, etc. they are soooo unhealthy over each other bruh

Yes!!!!

Batman (1940) Issue #13

Perfect anon! This scene here is shows exactly what's going on with Dick's mentality.

On Bruce's side, he's really worried because "It isn't right for a kid like you to be chasing around and getting into fights!" and this is where Dick's mentality stems from - from the fact that Bruce lied to get Dick to drop it but he never clarified it. He made it out like Dick was the problem which I believe is the start of all his issues with Batman and why Dick's so overcompetent in everything- he feels like he has to prove himself.

After sobbing his heart about, Dick literally says "I'll run away and show him I can take care of my self!"

Bruce is so toxic sometimes. He blames Dick on incompetence because he's worried about moral issues of letting a child fight adult villains. wow.

In layman's terms, Dick seeks academic validation where he thinks his self-worth is tied to his academic achievements or in this case, how much of an equal he is to Batman.

Kori once said in a Titans comic -

Teen Titans and Outsiders Secret Files and Origins 2005

Considering how much of a free spirit Dick and Bruce consider Dick's robin, she's not quite right but she's right in that he thought his achievements would make Batman see him as an equal. When Bruce didn't treat him as such, Dick got really mad and started working harder and breaking his own records so Bruce would acknowldge him.

Meanwhile, Bruce was having a moral crisis and he's under the impression that if he kept pretending that Dick wasn't his equal, then Dick would eventually give up and quit. But this results in the paradox: Unstoppable force meets immovable object. However there is an answer to this riddle. When an unstoppable force meets an immovable object, the immovable object is moved because it lacks any force for holding it in place.

Hence, Dick continued being Robin until Dick got fed up with Bruce trying to cage him. At the beginning Dick had free reign but as he grew older, Bruce kept trying to press him under his cape but Dick wanted to be free. He didn't want to be a sidekick, he wanted to prove to Batman that he was equal and worthy of him.

So the ultimatum was set and as Dick's eighteenth birthday drew closer, so did Bruce's dread that Dick would leave him behind so he fired him first. He would rather haunt his mind in anger than be forgotten and left behind.

In summary I can say Dick's addiction to becoming Bruce's equal is the result of an intentional misunderstanding by Bruce to protect him only it didn't go the way Bruce planned.

However because Bruce let this feeling fester for so long that now, even when Bruce tells Dick that he surpassed him and means it, Dick will never believe it because in his mind he will always be that 8 year old boy that Bruce once said wasn't good enough.

Bruce certainly feels guilty for it but there's no doubt that a small part of him is satisfied that because of what he did, Dick will always come back to him in the end. Even if it's not out of willingness, it will be out of sheer need to prove Bruce wrong and he's okay with that no matter how bad it makes him feel.

And that's why these two are addicted to each other in the most unhealthiest ways possible.

[ofallthingsnasty]

Urrrgg im such a wuss about physical pain but something about punctured wounds specifically makes me scared more than cuts or bruises. I think it’s something about the “intrusion” that a sharp object does when it stabs you that it doesn’t do when merely cutting you

Suffice to say Crocodile even threatening to give me a “piercing” will scare me into submission. Suddenly I’m throwing out my escape plans because I do not want to be hurt like that 😓 Sir you can spank me however you want but PLS don’t put that hook anywhere near my face

oh goodness anon, you're way too cute 😭💕 he would never ever hurt you because i say so.... but this also made me think...

tw. yandere, violence, a little over-the-top gore (facial), references this post

Now that you mention it - there are two ways he could harm you with his hook in that specific scenario, one more planned and one more impulsive. (To pierce your tongue, he’d need a forceps or at the very least a very steady hand or else he’s going not only cut into your tongue but the floor of your mouth as well - which could lead to severe bleeding and neurological damage, oh my. Your cheeks are a different story - he might still injure a tiny branch of the facial nerve but you’re not going to lose some motor functions.) 

But to be honest - if he does this to you, it’s going to be entirely impulsive because he’d have to be exceptionally mad. Angry beyond belief or reason, so precision and thought aren’t going to be present. (Even if I really want him to get my tongue, ugh 😔) He isn’t even going to threaten it, he’ll just launch forward like a man possessed and puncture your cheek, force his hook through the fat of your face until he hits your teeth, just lashing out, just senselessly hurting you to shut you and your horrid mouth up.  And god help you if you react on instinct and pull away, because that is going to net you an open cheek and a nasty scar.

Will he feel guilty just moments later, as rare as that emotion is for him? Yes. Will it stop your incessant  babbling and shock you into submission? Also yes. Like you said, I can only see this happening once, maybe twice? You’d have to do something so outrageous and disrespectful and keep at it to get this rather calm man to that point - but it’s achievable and a serious escape attempt could do it.  But you being feisty plays a big part in this - because if you aren’t (if you grovel and cry and beg for forgiveness, kiss his feet to soothe that anger, worship him like you’re supposed to), he won’t end up that mad. You’re still going to regret it, no doubt, but he has this pesky little soft spot for you that, if pressed, can mellow him out rather quickly. It really depends on you and your actions.

But if it happens? If the meat of your right cheek suddenly loses tension and flaps around because his hook is too big to control and you instinctively pulled back, away from the pain, the hurt? All that anger is going to evaporate in an instant. He just needs to see your stunned face, pain barely registering because of the adrenaline that is running through you, just needs to see all that exposed fat and muscle to immediately regret it. It’s a grotesque sight; yellow, pink, stark red mixing as your teeth gnash in horror and your thoughts are going a mile a minute trying to register what just happened. Of course, he wastes no time and takes you in for the best care he can find in that moment, intent on keeping both the functional and aesthetic damage to a minimum - but his hook is big and brutish and the wound leaves you with a gnarly scar, no matter how skilled the hands of your surgeon are.

When it’s all said and done, he’ll still feel that little pang of guilt from time to time when he traces the scar with his thumb - but it’s more that feeling of regret a little boy gets when he scratches up a brand new toy, that disappointment that it isn’t shiny and new anymore and not genuine remorse because he inflicted so much pain on you. He can’t feel bad about it for too long when he remembers that you see what disobedience gets you every time you look into the mirror. It might have marred your looks - but it has made you so wonderfully pliant as well, has earned him your respect. 

[arashi-no-saxlphone]

whats your opinion on asuka r kreutz

Buddy. Oh man. Either you know me and went on anon to enable me (in which case, thank you) or you're newer here and haven't seen me cry about Guilty Gear's saddest wettest cat yet.

I fucking adore Asuka R Kreutz. I think he's one of the most tragic and complex characters in Guilty Gear. I was gonna put "Well-written" too buuuut... it's hard to track down clear answers for some of the stuff that covers his time with Freddy and Aria as scientists and so I generally extrapolate what feasibly happened to the best of my ability based on what we have. (I am by no means a full-on expert, but I know enough to tell you this man does not deserve all the flack he gets).

In general, I find Asuka to be an immensely tragic and complicated man who at his core, just didn't want things to change and didn't want to lose his only and most dear friends in the whole world. Every single thing he has ever done was fueled by one of two things - his curiosity (which you can consider a flaw, as it often by his own account causes him to neglect right and wrong) or his deep love for Frederick and Aria (I find this to be his driving force for most of his actions in the story of Guilty Gear, right up until shit becomes so absolutely fucked that he has to spend most of his time trying to fix everything that goes wrong and banking on Sol to come through for him as a warrior). Asuka is the embodiment of the phrase "The road to hell is paved with good intentions" and that's probably why in lore he's labelled as "The Devil" in addition to "The Gearmaker."

When Aria gets sick, he suggests putting her in cryosleep until they can cure her disease. She refuses because she doesn't want to miss out on her time with Frederick. "Ok," he says, "well I can do something about that so please agree." And she agrees. And Asuka makes Sol a Gear and fucking immortal without telling him. Then all that crazy bullshit that kickstarts the crusades happens and Sol has to kill Aria because Asuka made her into Justice. This part is fucked up. It's a major fuckup on Asuka's part. In a drama CD, it's highlighted how important Aria's humanity and personhood is to her, and Asuka takes that away when he turns her into Justice. "What's the justification then?"

When Asuka found out that the government was going use their research to create gears as weapons and use them for war, he did EVERYTHING he could to try and stop that. Asuka isn't stupid - he's smart. He's a scientific genius. He could've easily taken the sleeping Frederick and Aria and fucked off, but he wanted to right a wrong. And it just... didn't work. He turned Aria into Justice, and though I think he probably intended to turn her back (after all, we see him demonstrate the ability to undo what he did to Sol at the end of strive) he never got the chance. Because the Universal Will overloads her and Justice just starts the Crusades.

In Overture's story, Asuka makes it clear to Sol that he needs him to be a warrior in order to be prepared for more horrors to come. Asuka realizes after the crusades that he can't fix it alone - everything he's done to solve a problem has so far ended up with him making things worse. Sol hates him. He knows Sol hates him. You know what's fucked up though?

He wants Sol to hate him. He feels like he deserves it.

I feel the need to point out that the crusades last over a century - Sol is immortal because of the gear cells and flame of corruption, but Asuka was just a normal guy - why/how is he here? Asuka created a synthetic body for himself that would not age, and transferred his consciousness into it so that he would not change. So that no matter what, Sol would recognize him. Knowing Sol wouldn't forgive him, knowing that he would always be able to find him, he didn't care - he never ever wanted to lose Sol.

Asuka clearly cares about people. He realizes the consequences of his actions, and he's clearly capable of feeling guilt over them. Look at what he does while working with I-No and Raven: He builds the Jack-O unit in the hopes that he can bring Aria back. He builds the Happy Chaos unit in the hope that he can help I-No regain her full self without going insane. He's Raven's only friend, a man who has been cast aside countless times and used for his powers. Those aren't the actions of a selfish or wholly callous man. If he was callous, he wouldn't try so hard to make SURE he could never escape Sol's anger by making himself permanently recognizable.

"Well maybe he just selfishly didn't want to let go of Sol." This is a legitimately fair point. However, let's recall what happens in the strive story: Asuka offers Frederick a choice between letting him remove the gear cells and flame of corruption from him, or letting Sol kill him.

I need you to look me in the eyes when I tell you I can't handle this part. I can't. Well over a century of fuckups and shit going wrong while Asuka desperately tries to make a million things right that weren't even entirely his fault to begin with - he didn't want to make Gears as weapons, hell he didn't even want to be a scientist! He laments about not having any control over his life and certain decisions. In all of that though, he fucking loves his friends Frederick and Aria. Now one of them's dead because of him, and the other one hates him, and after over 100 years of planning and thinking and work-

Asuka R Kruetz has no idea how to look Frederick Bulsara in the eye and tell him he's sorry. He only knows how to fix it, and also how to offer Sol a chance to feel better about it - I think he truly believes that after everything, if Sol killing him will make Sol feel better, that that's what he should let happen. I'm so fucking ill. Asuka thinks the fucking WORLD of Frederick - listen to this bit of his Strive theme, "The Gravity:"

"As the universe turned black / did the sun ever defy fate? / beyond it all do you recognize me?"

In case you aren't familiar with how Sol Badguy got his name, the government gave him the codename "Badguy" while he was running around wrecking gear compounds. "Sol" is a name given to him by Slayer, because he "shone brightly like the sun."

Now look at that snippet from Asuka's theme again - that line about the sun defying fate? That's about Sol. That's about how much he loves and values Sol, someones he repsect and looks up to, and the only person he had left to count on to fix the world that he feels like he fucked up.

As we know, Sol chooses to let Asuka just un-gear him, but after that Asuka just... leaves. He goes to the moon with the tome of origin to protect it from falling into the wrong hands. Do you know how fucking badly it fucks me up, that after everything, Asuka just ends up alone? He spent over a century trying to fix the world, nothing he did worked, and when it finally did everything was different. Everything. Aria is gone, Frederick is happier but not in his life anymore, and Asuka is alone. Everything he ever did started with his love for Frederick and Aria, and at the end of it all he's alone. And he feels guilty.

His Strive arcade Story rips me to fucking pieces - Asuka clones himself and when he does, the clone Asuka R # mentions specifically that Asuka made him "Chattier." He mentions that Asuka "Doesn't like himself." I read that as Asuka making an idealized version of himself - a self that wouldn't fuck up, a self that wouldn't be hated, but also

A self that would carry on his work.

This is where it gets heavy, but I personally believe Asuka intended to kill himself initially. He has no idea how to say sorry to Frederick, no idea how to atone, and no idea how to exist in a world that so far, he feels he has only ever fucked up in. Another snippet from his theme: "does existence have meaning? / the reality or the truth, the reality of the truth / what fact should we accept? / The reality or the truth? reality" He's trying to figure out if he can still live, if even if he wants to live, does he even deserve to? Have the right to? How can he atone?

The clone states, though it dances around it, that it's worried for Asuka - worried that he's hoping he'll lose the fight, hoping he'll die. But two of the possible outcomes (as strive arcade mode dialogue tends vary based on performance) are listed below:

In both of these conversations, the clone cites a desire to exist - which to the clone, since it is also Asuka in way, means that the original Asuka wants to exist too - and therefore that he can, and is trying to figure out how to.

I think Asuka, like a lot of Gear characters, is about trying to find a place in the world - even if the whole world feels like it's not built for you. All Asuka has ever done is tried - and failed. But he's still here. He DID manage to unfuck everything, and he did it because he DID still have Sol. Another bit of insight his clone dumps on him:

that bit there: "I know you can't affirm yourself. But at least tell me you’ll keep walking. Even if you lose your way. As long as one person out there cares about you… It’s worth it just to try to keep them happy." This is a common theme in Gear: relationships, both romantic and platonic, saving people; connections to others giving people a reason to go on or to see a new perspective that makes life worth living. Jack-O found Sol, who treated her like her own person and made her realize she was more than just a replacement for Aria. Dizzy found Ky and vice versa, changing Ky's perspective on Gears and having Dizzy realize she could be happy even in a world that treated her like a monster. Here on the moon, creating Asuka R# to talk to, Asuka is trying his very best to see and understand the world through Frederick's eyes - a world that Frederick saw as worth fighting for:

Asuka is a character who hasn't found his way yet, but all that matters is that he keeps looking.

Uh so to answer your question, I love Asuka R Kreutz - maybe you can tell by the fact that I dumped an absolute trainwreck mess on you after one small ask. Sorry! I apologize about this being a little all over the place and not having as much cohesion as I would've liked but this character is very dense and complicated and I did this kinda quickly so I had to sort through a bunch of weird feelings as I typed - I hope you found at least some of it interesting.

Thank you for the ask!

Ah, and a big fat huuuuuuuuge thank you to the stellar and amazing new Gear wiki, which is where I pulled those screenshots of his arcade mode script from! It's really a wonder how fast the wiki was put together and just what a fantastic resource it is for stuff like this; it saved me having to watch a video or, god forbid, try and do Asuka's arcade mode myself. Below is a link to the wiki page I pulled Asuka's stuff from - please check it out cause I didn't even come close to covering the full depth of what's talked about in his Arcade mode story and also because the wiki is glorious and deserves love:

[yuri-is-online]

Just finished the Jabberwock chapter.... there's so many questions (and possible theories) but rn I just wanted to talk about how Hyde mentioned the ghouls who were worried about MC - for Vagastrom, in jpn he specifically says "a certain someone from Vagastrom" rather than "one or two" and I'm willing to bet it's definitely Sho, since Hyde is the one mentioning it, and soon after he says he wasn't supposed to say that, I can imagine Sho giving him the stink eye to not let anyone know about it lol. Also right after this I got a campus event where Sho almost runs over MC on his bike because she wasn't looking where she was going while watching out for some croc anomalies(?) and he gets mad (worried) telling her what's the point if she's dead and points out where she has to keep an eye out on. I love him Your Honor....

We don't know too much about Hyde yet, but from that last conversation I wonder if having his own younger brother be a ghoul contributed in his empathy towards them ("in the end they're just young boys on the inside") or if he always felt that way. I wonder why exactly he wants humans and anomalies to get along, because while the idea itself might sound nice and peaceful, at the same time it sounds like something a villain with "good intentions" would say too lol. Hyde final boss?

Also rip MC who has to deal with Taiga next chapter lol. After fun times with the Jabberwock kids it's back to treading on thin ice (or glass shards in this case)

Cleaning out all the TDB asks before the new chapter drops at 1 am my time (_ _ )⊹ ࣪ ˖ I am so tired friends

Hyde vs Crowley, who is more likely to be a final boss. My money is on Crowley but Hyde do be looking like Gojo and we all know how my girl felt about the school board.

I swear we must have the same game anon because I literally had just read that school moment before you sent this ask. MC is trying to be aware of zipper crocs, which as a side note: each of the boys cards has a corresponding warding card of the same rarity. The higher rarity warding cards seem to be based off of moments in the story or aspects unique to the character while the SR and R cards are based off anomalous creatures. You get the corresponding SR warding card for your first boy in that joke of a pull they have you do in the tutorial, and the Zipper Croc is Tohma's.

The way Sho speaks to her in that moment (╥﹏╥) the way he's so concerned. Angry even that she's not taking care of herself, because "what good will that excuse be if you die?" I love him so much. And because of that I keep thinking about how guilty he has got to feel about almost letting her die in Book 2. You think he wakes up in the middle of the night to stare at his ceiling because he's thinking about how her mangled body would look staring up at him in judgement if he had just gone along with Leo's plan a little bit more than he did? Do you think that he's eventually going to snap if he keeps hearing Leo talk about MC like she's expendable because the longer he spends time with her the more real she becomes to him? You ever think about Sho looking at her while she's occupied with something else and not paying attention to him and realizing that his time with her has a very real time limit and that she's going to die in a year, however much of which has already passed?

You ever think about an MC who maybe jokes off offhandedly about helping him out now since she won't always be around and him loosing it just a bit because he doesn't want to even think about that even a little. Because I have been oh have I been

I wasn't expecting to like Hyde as much as I do. Don't get me wrong he seems extremely irresponsible, but he clearly loves his brother and his students, which makes him at least ok in my book. If I had to guess I would say Sho being a ghoul probably does have something to do with him being more understanding of the ghouls and their predicament. He has a unique insight into it that the other professors don't, but it could also be that he wants anomalies and humans to get along because through his own research he's seen how important anomalous creatures like the Kraken are to the world and he wants people to have a more respectful attitude towards that. I can't see him doing anything to harm Sho, so if the school ends up being the bad guy I think he'll be our ally.

Well not physically harm anyway... Oooooooh "a certain someone from Vagastrom" that was so fucking Sho. And Hyde so said that to be cheeky about it because he thinks it's cute that his little brother has got a little crush ¬‿¬ no it's ok Shohei, big brother won't tell! He pinky swears! Hyde would be such an annoyingly supportive wing man for his little brother if he'd just let him, if Sho has any classes he shares with the MC he so ends up assigned to a group with her on "accident" more than once. It makes a degree of sense too, I think Alan probably would trust that everything is all right and if it's note he will hear about it, if not from the school than from Tohma. Leo probably thought the whole thing was MC's fault anyway but Sho? He had to be so worried about MC and feel so trapped. It's not like he was going to get permission from Alan to go looking for her, and with Leo being Leo it's not like he really had anyone to turn to about his worries but Hyde, who was definitely supposed to be sworn to secrecy.

I am actually more worried about Romeo and Ritsu at this point than Taiga. Like don't get me wrong, that boy ain't right but I can handle someone being a bit homicidal.

Ritsu is easily the cuntiest out of the freshmen about MC at the intro ceremony and Romeo is willing to take MC in for the bounty dead or alive. I feel like this whole book is a bit of a trip, MC about to be kidnapped by a mob boss fr

[harrysmimi]

Still Want You

Synopsis: Harry wants a restart but YN still feels guilty for what happened

More of my work | Based on this ask

I really hope you like this anon. Took me pong enough to write this.

PS. I haven't edited this cuz I am too lazy. I'm sowwyyy :(

Harry was nervous knocking on the door. He tugged on the neckline of his t-shirt as he dripped the small bouquet of red and white roses, a box of chocolate covered almonds and a small pack of cat treats.

He was there to see his favourite girl and his favourite boy ever.

It's been almost a year he has seen YN. He was finally ready to start over and get his life together, since past ten months he's had a great tour, released a new album and was back on a little break.

YN and Harry have been together for well over two years, inseparable and madly in love with one another. Harry loved the fact that she was his little secret that he so selfishly wanted to keep with him. Which unfortunately was one of the reason which drove them apart.

His breath hitched when she opened the door and first thing a white fluffy cat with big green eyes came to greet him. That was Prince, the cat he adopted for her for her birthday, he was (and his) their son. Prince loves Harry deeply to say the least.

"Harry?" Her voice was barely audible but he hear her nerves getting through her just loud enough. She is an anxious person, he knows that.

"YN!" He greeted her with a pleasant yet sad enough smile. She moved aside so he can come in and closed the door when he did.

It was a new place, just three streets away from the place he rented for them to move in together, as a surprise. It was small, just enough for a person and a pet. Everything looked dull and gloomy, there was just a bed with a pillow, and a sofa seperating the room into a living area and a bedroom. It was like her old flat she first moved into, but a little smaller and two rooms less as she shared that one with a roommate, there was a seperate living room at least.

YN got him a glass of water the first thing as he took a seat on the sofa. He could see she had set up her laptop up on the coffee table with a dozen unread emails and half eaten plate of Rice and Daal with a side of raw mango pickle. She sat on the other side of the sofa waiting patiently for him to start the conversation.

"I wanted to see you." He started to which she just smiled. "YN look I am sorry for what happened, but let's start all over again please!"

"I should be the one apologising." She looked at him with the same guilt he saw all those months ago.

It was months ago YN and Harry were starting have little arguments here and there. It was unusual for him. Yes, YN would have her bursts of frustration and anger here and there but Harry always made sure to be the mature one understanding the circumstances of situation. He'd be the one sitting her down and making her talk her mind and heart and share the same when she'd unknowingly hurt his feelings. He's always been patiently wonderful with that.

But they were both particularly bitter about the situations which were coming up one by one. It started with when YN wanted to bring home with her for her Diwali break. Even though her and her family did not celebrate it, they were willing to meet up with him and spend the holidays, even one of her cousin was getting married right after Diwali. It was a huge thing for YN, he knew that. But he had chosen to back down.

A festival and a wedding means there would be people, and where there are people, means there would be countless pictures and with his lifestyle, he prefers to keep his private life private. It means he wouldn't have been able to keep his dreamy little secret, a secret. He wanted to meet her family but in private. While her intentions were never vile, he knew the internet would ruin her mental peace.

But soon after they had to stop going out together on dates, to eat out. She had to stop being seen with him. Which made YN feel hurt.

She wanted to everything with Harry. Yeah, she was willing to endure everything given what came to be with him, hell she was even sceptical for weeks after he asked her out for the first time for the same thing! But once she was all in, she was willing to risk it all. She even put on an armer and spoke to her very strict brown parents about him.

YN was angry at him for months.

All she wanted was share what they had with not having to constantly look over their shoulders. And him protecting her got no where, still to this date she recieves nasty comments online. Even her LinkedIn profile is not safe for her to log into gor work.

Though she feels guilty for what she did. Despite her annoyance and frustration what she did was not right in any sense.

She was out with her colleagues and had kissed her colleague Harry hated the most, to which she came clean after whole three weeks. Just when Harry had cooked her an amazing meal and bought her favourite flowers to apologise for being so overly protective and to ask her to move in with him. She wasn't drunk that day, she has never touched alcohol in her life.

Just as YN was about to say something, her work phone started ringing. He somehow forgot she works from home most of the time and it wasn't a weekend. She excused herself to answer the ohone to ask to person to postpone whatever she had to do.

"I'm sorry about that," she placed the phone face down on the coffee table to look at him. YN still hasn't been able to forgive herself for what she did. She should have been mature and talk to him.

Since their time apart her life had a big down fall, and it's falling down in the blackhole some hell universe. She had switched her job, her family back home was going through hell and she couldn't go back because who would help her family if she went back home. Her grand dad had passed and their family business was crashing each passing day. Her dad and his brother could do so much with handling biggest loss of their life. She was going through a lot in that moment. But that does not justify her actions what so ever!

Harry told her, he needed some time. And by some she never thought it was be more then ten months and few rebounds later. They never officially broke up or even had that conversation. She deserved to see all that, she made herself believe that. She was more upset with herself than she was to be with him when they never actually called off anything. That was that.

"Have taken me long enough to come in and say that I accept your apologies." He spoke as he carefully tried to move closer to her. He doesn't want her to move away. "I was equally responsible for hurting you after the same."

Harry could see her relax a bit but stiffen up again, so he carefully moved closer to her. "Look we can at least be good friends." He softly spoke as he took her hand, still remembering the feeling like it was yesterday. Her hands still held that warmth he never forgot and they still felt tiny against his own.

YN let out a shaky breath. She have been trying. Trying so hard to get over little heartbreak, it was more harder than when she had her heart broken for the first time. She thought about being friends with him and actually trying to reconcile just so she can have a great person like him in her life again.

Alas she is a jealous person, and she can see him with anyone else. She don't want to be that toxic friend to anyone, so she had made up her mind that if Harry didn't wanted to be back with her she'd never ask to be at least his friend. She looked up at him through her lashes as tears filled her eyes.

"I can't." She admitted.

"Hey, come here!" He whispered as he wrapped his arm around her.

YN never thought she'd be so vulnerable after seeing him again. She had been preparing herself to be strong and act like she has grown much mature and not breakdown, but she did. "I am so sorry!" She started chanting in muffled voice, guilt of hurting him stil felt so saw like it happened just a minute ago.

"Hey, hey, you're fine, you're fine." He gently smoothed her hair as he rubbed her back.

"I still, I still can't get that out of my head!" She muffled again his shirt.

"It's gonna take time." He admitted, "but if you give us a chance, we can make it work. I promise will try my best love. It's been so hard to breathe without you."

"I cheated on you. I don't deserve you, you deserve someone so much better than me." She broke from the hug, a little frustrated maybe. At herself to be exact.

"So did I." He admitted too. Maybe it's not right to get together back again but he have seen being get through so much worse together. Maybe, just maybe they can work it out. Yes, they can work it out. "Told you need a break and did the same. Maybe this is wrong, to get back together. But maybe we could make it the best thing ever. I promise I won't try so hard to protect you from every little thing which comes with my profession."

"I still haven't forgiven myself, Harry," corners of her mouth quivered, "I haven't."

"You want some time, take as much time as you need. Still want you, my love. That's all."

She just nodded and they sat in silence for what felt like ages until YN broke the silence with her sniffles, she wiped her tears and looked at him. "You want some daal chawal?" She knows how much he loves that.

He let out a soft shy chuckle, "you know I am not going to say no."

"I'll get you a plate." He nodded and walked to the kitchen.

......................................................................

It was four months later. YN and Harry started to talk more recently and back together officially, giving one another time they need.

It wasn't until just just on Sunday YN agreed to go on a date with him for next weekend, her day off. He was going to take her see Niall at the Wembley. It was Monday and Harry couldn't wait already.

Waiting for Saturday and going to studio like a torture to him for the first time. He haven't got to see YN much since he visited her, she had been busy with her work. Apparently she was getting a promotion, she'd be the youngest senior manager at her firm and the pressure was too much so he did not wanted to be in her way. But they spoke, stayed on phone calls on her lunch break and texted throughout the day as both of them got free time. Late replies did mot seemed so bad after all now.

It was finally Saturday and Harry was there to pick up YN at her flat. He was all stocked up on the water bottles as it was hot, he knew she wanted to stand in the merch line and buy almost every single thing even though she can get everything delivered to her doorstep on her one command. She is a true Niall fan. He still remembers the first time she got to meet Niall, she was freaking out and now they've become best of friends.

"Hello my love." He greeted her as she opened the door.

"I am so sorry, I forgot to send this important file that why I am late." She anxious ran to her bathroom to where he followed her.

"It's alright love, the show doesn't start for next six hours." He assured her. "And knowing Niall, it won't start for next ten, so don't worry about it." She laughed at that comment.

She was wearing a pair of baggy jeans and a large white shirt keeping it simple and cute, should he add. She had her hair in a braid and put on a pair of silver hoops. And they were ready to go. "Oh we're matching!"

"Oh yeah!" He realised.

She rolled her eyes, "when are you going to stop copying me." He just chuckled and walked a step forward to place a soft peck on the back of her head.

"Never." He mumbled taking in the smell of her shampoo."You look very pretty, love when you wear Kajal."

"I am going to look like a panda real quick." She grabbed her glasses off the counter and put them on.

"A gorgeous panda, might I add." He added and recieved a elbow to his rib before they both fell in fit of laugh. She grabbed her sling bag on the way out. But Harry stopped her at the exit of her building.

"Before we walk out, I have to tell you something." He let out a anxious breath. "We are taking Sam with us, just to be safe, okay? Don't want anyone of us getting hurt unknowingly."

"Okay." She nodded. Well that's understandable, if not for her, for him at least. No one knows her there but every fucking one knows him there. Once they walked out of the building, he found he even got a chauffeur for the day.

"Oh yeah, one more thing." He reached the back pocket his jeans and pulled out a tennis bracelet.

It was the Tiffany bracelet he got her one random day just because, and she wore it every single day no matter if it went with her outfit or not since then. He recieved that back when she returned all his stuff back to him with all of his hoodies and the tad bits of gift he gave her.

"You still kept it?" She looked rather surprised.

"Of course I kept it, know how much you cherish this." He gently grabbed her hand and placed the bracelet around her wrist, he tried to approach her with a kiss but she cuddle close to him swiftly dodging the moment. He just needs to give her some time so he settled with placing a gentle peck on her head.

They reached the venue in half an hour, stood in the line to buy the merch and just making it in time for lunch with Niall. YN did not expect Harry to get VIP passes, even though the performer is literally his best friend. She still did not expected to go to a concert with VIP passes. Yes she saw Harry perform multiple times but it was with his family in the privacy box standing by the side of the stage. This was whole knew experience for her. They were going to the VIP tent there with Niall's mum and girlfriend.

"Be careful here." Harry grabbed her hand as he guided her through the metal walkway around the stage to the pit area where the tent was. He knows these things are nasty slippery even through they have little bumps on them which are supposed to be slip resistant.

The whole evening Harry wasn't afraid of how people would treat the girl he loves so much. He wasn't afraid of hold her thinking about all the nasty things people might say. He sang and danced all evening along with her with his best friend performing there. It was when Niall was playing This Town with his guitar trapped on, at the end of the cat walk.

Harry's got his arms around the girl he adore so much to sing along, just so she can hear him. "If the whole world was watching, I'd still dance with you. Drive highways and byways to be there with you, over and over the only truth, everything come back to you." That made her turn her head around to look at him, he couldn't hold back the bright smile as he placed a kiss on the apple of her cheek, "you still make me nervous when you walk in the room, them butterflies they come alive when I'm next to you, over and over the only truth everything comes back to you, hmmm!" YN leaned into him there. She could start crying.

"You wanna take a picture?" He suggested as the song ended.

"Oh yes!" YN pulled out her phone from her bag and the posed for a few selfies and Harry clicked a few pictures of her while Niall was in between set change.

After the show, Harry her took her to her favourite place for dinner. And that was about the night before he drive her back to her place with all the merch she bought.

......................................................................

It was a few more months later.

YN mostly worked from home, she only ever had to go to work if there was a meeting or briefing to be done. It was one of those days for her, but more important somehow. Her day at work ended at three in the afternoon as she was early reporting to work. She had taken in a cab there as her car at the service centre. So Harry decided to go pick her up.

Harry waited for her outside her work building as he couldn't go in because the security won't let him in without an ID. He don't have that obviously, because he is not an employee there and he knew YN was done anyway so he didn't mind waiting for her by his car. He was dressed all comfy in a pair of sweats and puffer with a beanie on his head. It was November already and getting colder already.

YN did not liked Mondays, that's what he knew really. But this particular Monday she was very giddy and got up at six in the morning and reported to work at eight sharp. He wasn't sure what was so special about today but she seemed very ecstatic about it.

"Harry!" He hear his name as she ran out of the door, dressed in a baby pink suit and her black coat on top of it with her laptop bag slung around her right shoulder. The first thing she did was jump in his arms to place a firm kiss on his mouth. Taking Harry by utter shock. It was the first time they kissed, he did not mind it, he rather loved it actually. "I. Got. The promotion!" She squealed stomping like a little toddler. He could see little tears of joy in corner of her eyes.

"Oh my goodness!" He was surprised to hear that too, she has been after this promotion for so long, "I am so proud of you baby!" He pulled her in a warm hug. He had seen her obsess about this project wanting it to be perfect for one of the biggest clients in her firm, followed by which she would happen her promotion.

"You are?" She cooed, sounding like she'd cry.

"Yes baby, I am!" He exclaimed as he squeezed her tighter, "so, so, so proud of you my love!" He carefully pulled apart enough to look at her. "You deserved it." He placed a kiss on her forehead. She just buried her face in his chest.

"I need to call Mumma." She chuckled as she pulled away to wipe her tears.

"Yeah?" He smiled, "give me this, call you mum." He grabbed her laptop bag and proceeded to place it on the back seat as she made her way to the passenger seat calling her mother already.

They had the day planned out already, they were going to go to his place. The new place he got just a month ago in a more gated area with more security for her personal safety.

"You kissed me." Harry said as he closed his front door, she had already taken off her coat. His puffer was already off in the car itself.

"Yes..." YN nodded anxiously, "I am sorry if you didn't wanted me to."

"Are you kidding me? I've been dying to kiss you my love!" He took a big step towards her as he grabbed her by her waist to place a gentle kiss on her mouth. "Oh I've missed this!" He place another feathery kiss on corner of her mouth, he could feel her melt in his arms there as her knees almost gave in. With his arm on her back and behind her knees he picked her up as he spun her around.

......................................................................

It was another day of celebration for YN as she was able get another big project in to the firm just a year after her promotion, her superior arranged a little dinner party for her. It was a very formal event, with the CEO and all the vice presidents present there. Of course she took Harry with him.

Harry had drove YN back to her place his place as they planned last minute on spending the weekend in at his. They both changed into some comfy clothes.  Luckily Harry kept all of her clothes as they were.

They both got comfy on the sofa. "Need some water." Harry got up from his place and walked in the kitchen. The kitchen at his new was surprised put of sight from living room and it was weirdly quite at his, except Prince snoring next to her. Harry was watching him for the day while YN was at work. He had a blast the three hours Harry was at the dinner with her, running around the house that he passed out on the sofa there.

Harry came back, acting a bit fiddly. He watched as YN flipped through Netflix. He knew he have to do this. He wants to do this.

He placed a kiss on her mouth before he got on both his knees with her hands in his, their laced finger layed on her lap. He had to resist himself from giving her get another kiss or he would forget to say what he is going to say.

"What happened?" She asked looking at him confused.

"I've got say something." He started with a bright smile and flushed cheeks. "Rather I've got something to ask you."

"If you're asking me to move in, then not until—"

"We get married, I know." He interrupted her, "I actually wanted to ask you, will you marry me? You don't have to answer now, take as much time as possible. As long as it takes, I still want you." He could feel his heart thumping in his ears.

"You are serious with this?" She asked in a low voice, not believing what is happening, as her eyes welled up with tears. "You want to get married?"

"Yes, I am damn serious about this." He announced. "I want to get married."

"Yes, I will marry you Harry!" She exclaimed as pulled him in for a hug. Suddenly there were claps heard from the kitchen as her family and Harry's family walked out. "What the—" she hid her face in Harry's shirt as she knew her kajal was all messed up already, Gemma was recording this. Harry laughed as he looked at her face and helped her fix her face, wiping her tears with the sleeve of white shirt he wore.

"It's okay, your cute panda face is just for me to see." He whispered to her making her chuckle.

"It's official now!" YN's mum announced. It was just their immediate family. Harry's parents and his sister, her parents and her brothers. And they knew there was going to be a proper engagement ceremony done, not today but someday.

Harry wanted to give YN a heads up, given the fact how their relationship took a turn and how hard it was mend things and beat the odds. He didn't expected her to say yes then and there but he was prepared with a ring. Anne handed him the ring he had custom made just for his girl.

"Want to make it official, official." He opened the box to reveals a beautiful ring, which he took time in sliding onto her finger.

"Even we have a surprise for you." YN's brother announced as he handed his sister a box too. It was a platinum band in there. Just a cultural thing where it is permissible for men to wear gold or jewels, Harry respects that. He knows they are going to have a proper engagement ceremony planned out in future all abiding by her cultural rituals. This was just for family and their eyes only.

She slid the ring on his finger too. And they were officially, officially engaged now.

This wasn't something Harry imagined would ever happen.

......................................................................

N O T E :

Well... Had this in my inbox for a while while now. I am so so so sorry this took forever to post! 🤧 Hope you liked it. Ik I'm a bit rusty that I haven't wrote anything since like January.

I love you xx

[softcitrus2345]

Hii!! This is the first time I have ever reached out to someone in this community because I am very scared of being 'found out' and I find it hard to accept myself for what I like 😓 But your account feels very safe, and ur art is so gorgeous bsjsbdj!!!. I read ur tips from a while ago about how to start an account and I would rlly like to share my art out there and connect with likeminded people, and present all my ocs to the world that I have hidden in a folder on my procreate HELP. If this isn't too personal of a question, do u have an tips on self acceptance when it comes to this niche?

Oh man, I totally feel you there, I'll do my best to help ya out!

I completely understand the struggle with self-acceptance with this niche, so many spaces both in the internet and real life have stigmatized this kind of niche and made it out to be something disgusting and perverted, and something to be ashamed about..

I struggled for years with myself, feeling guilty for being into these sorts of things, and for "tainting" my characters with these thoughts, and the occasional drawing I would make in a notebook and promptly rip out and hide somewhere out of shame-

It took me a long time to finally understand why I felt the way I did, and what specific things about this niche appealed to me.

The thing that has helped me the most with the self-acceptance aspect is having a sense of community. Whether it be with just one person, or with a small group, having other people with similar interests that you can talk to and feel comfortable with helps a ton.

Around the same time last year was when I started to get more comfortable with this niche. I joined the server of an artist who's chonky art I really liked, and I got to meet new people and explore that part of myself more. But the best thing for me was finding out that one of my closest friends was also into the same things I was. It was just such a huge sense of relief when I found out, and once I started talking with her about it and sharing ideas back and forth, it became a lot easier to talk about, and it helped me get a lot more comfortable engaging with these interests of mine. A few months later, I found another one of my friends also liked this stuff, and then a few more months later, I found even MORE of my already close friends were into this

I guess the universe was just on my side, I'm so fortunate to have such kind and understanding friends that I can share this stuff with, and explore my interests with

Without them, this account wouldn't exist, and I wouldn't be making this kind of art that I share here, so I will always be grateful for that.

The best advice I can offer you is to find that sense of safety and community, whether it just be one person or several

Joining servers of artists who's work you enjoy is always a good way to meet new people, as well as interacting with artists you admire or other people in the community!

It's never easy to start, and don't get me wrong, I still do struggle with this stuff on and off, but I promise you it does get easier. Try to be kind to yourself

Think of it this way. It's SUPER normalized in society to be into like. Buff guys, or big boobies or butts or whatever, right?? Well being attracted to fat can also be seen that way if you really think about it-

Not saying that fat people should always be objectified in that way but I'm just trying to put that into perspective-

Hopefully that makes sense lol

Also, I am so glad to hear that you can find comfort and a sense of safety in this blog, because that's exactly my intention to have a safe space for people to explore their interests without fear of outside judgement

It means the world to me that you like my art so much and that you felt comfortable asking a tough question like that. I hope my advice can bring you some hope and clarity involving your situation 💖

I sincerely wish you the best, anon, I hope you can find the confidence to share your art with the world someday! I'd love to hear your ideas and see what kind of stuff you put out there!

[butmakeitgayblog]

Just to throw in a couple points real quick (because I can never keep an opinion to myself 😔 sorry), I personally kind of dislike the idea of a male and female gaze — not because I disagree with the concept of fetishism and objectification existing, they ABSOLUTELY do, but because of what people, particularly online, have come to accept they mean.

There has recently been discourse surrounding Love Lies Bleeding, a film created almost solely by queer women, “catering to the male gaze” which… I’m sure I don’t need to explain how silly that is lmao. I think this new wave of leftists clutching their pearls over literally any sign of sexual attraction and considering it to be synonymous with objectification has distorted people’s views of what these terms actually mean and have resulted in their gross misuse. Not to make this about me 💅🏻 but I see a lot of this similar discourse about trans people BY CIS PEOPLE whom are trying to be good allies by basically claiming that any sign of sexual attraction towards a trans person’s body is inherently fetishistic which I can’t lie… I kind of consider to be transphobic itself lol? You’re allowed to be sexually attracted to trans people and express that, no matter how their bodies look! The point at which it becomes fetishistic relies primarily on the WAY you express that and the language used — and I think that can apply to queer people in general too. I personally (and others may feel differently!) have zero issue with cis people enjoying trans NSFW content, and I also have no problem with straight women enjoying MLM content; because most of the time, I can tell from the LANGUAGE they use whether or not they are fetishising.

Point being, fetishism and objectification can go ALL ways and I don’t think people need to give excuses as to why they enjoy a certain type of content as long as it isn’t actively harming anyone. But I obviously can’t speak for everyone (especially queer women, I only identified as one for a year or two when I was a preteen lol) and people’s experiences tend to shape their opinions on these things 😅

Right and that's why I firmly stand behind my initial post about how it's no one's job to police people for what kind of content they consume! Because we don't know their motivations for how ot why they personally are interacting/consuming the work. It's incredibly easy to write off all enjoyment of a specific brand of content as fetishizing or sexualization when in reality, for the consumer it isn't that at all. My only point on the last ask was that sometimes, sometimes, it's easy to actually be doing exactly that (fetishizing etc) and not realizing it.

Intentions matter absolutely, but they're not the be-all-end-all of reality. It's like if I as a white person were to say something racist without realizing it was racist. That doesn't negate the racism, and it doesn't absolve me of my culpability, because my ignorance to my actions doesn't supercede my impact. You can be guilty of something without knowing that you are, and that's something you as person have to evaluate and confront on a personal basis. That was my only point in relation to what that anon said.

Again to reiterate, that is NOT saying that everyone who prefers queer work to straight work is guilty of that, because they're not. Full stop. And that alone is why I don't think anyone has or should have the authority to pass judgment on who can and can't consume certain kinds of media. Because, like you said, then you start wading into the murky waters of painting everyone with a broad brush, throwing accusations around that are universally damning despite not actually being universally true. And considering we're living in a period where puritan anti-sex brainrot is on the rise (alongside a deeply unsettling culture of condemnation over every little thing), opening that door can become very dangerous very fast. We're seeing it already.

I will tack on just as a thought regarding the trans character issue, I think that's kind of a perfect example of all these ideas aligning. Just in the most bare bones way of putting it: there is nothing inherently fetishizing about a cis person enjoying work including trans characters. There's nothing inherently fetishizing about a cis person enjoying, specifically, smut involving trans characters. There is nothing inherently fetishizing about a cis person preferring trans character stories over other kinds of media. However, if all they as a cis person consume is extremely sexualized renditions of trans characters, if their only interest in trans characters is porn - generally mostly devoid of complex storylines that create a fully rounded character -, then yeah I do think that's something they on an individual basis need to evaluate about themselves, because it's the difference between having a sexual attraction to a subsection of people versus seeing those same people as purely sexual objects. Does that make sense?

Same can be true for any other queer content being consumed by people that aren't historically the target audience.

But again, it's not really anyone else's place to make that call for anyone else.

[to-the-stars8]

If you do song inspired fics could i pretty please with a cherry on top have fem MC x beautiful doctor Julian inspired by Too sweet - Hozier

Me falling head first back into the arcana fandom has happened at the same time as me rediscovering my love for Hozier and that song just gives me such Julian vibes for some reason

I hope you have a lovely weekend 💘

(PS your other Julian fic made me want to rip my own heart out and stomp on it so i applaud you)

My job, as an author, anon, is to make sure I break your heart every once in a while so I am happy to hear my job was well done lol! And now is no different! This came out kind of angsty because of my interpretation of the song, hopefully, it's somewhat what you were looking for! I do hope to hear if you liked it, my love! Also thank you for reading my story, and hope you have a lovely/fantastic weekend yourself ❤️❤️❤️

I digress, so here is your lovely story!

You believed Julian Devorak was an easy man to read. That, despite all the times he would say he was a dangerous deviant, the truth always revealed that he was a good person. Troubled? Of course, but there were few people you knew who could not say the same. Perhaps it was the rough way he lived or the stories he would tell you that made you yearn for him. Endless were the nights where you stared at the ceiling recalling moments with him that seemed too real to be written off as mere fantasies. In these moments, you would call him by another name, “Ilya.” You liked the way it danced off your tongue and how sweet it tasted. 

One day, when Asra had left for another one of his adventures, Julian had entered the shop. You were nervous and ecstatic all at the same time. The night before you had gathered the courage to finally reveal how you felt about him, and this was the opportunity that fell right into your lap. 

Closing the shop, you ushered him to the kitchen with a smile. He sat at the table, looking intently at the wood, before asking how your day was. Smiling, you said, “Very well! I have gotten so much done this morning. You’ve arrived just in time, too, I was just about to have lunch. Are you hungry?”

Julian shook his head, and you noted that he seemed a bit quiet himself. You tried to not let the silence tug at your nervousness before turning your attention to making some tea instead. You felt more at ease with your hands busy. 

Despite the busy hands, you could feel butterflies erupt in your stomach so you finally blurted out how you felt. It was a rush of words that tumbled into one long, hardly cohesive sentence. All thoughts about lunch and tea were forgotten.

“I…I like you, Julian,” You said, finally finishing. “Very much so.”

When Julian looked at you, he saw memories that he could not quite place—Back when he was a different man. A better man. These memories, if he could even call them that since fantasy and reality had become muddled over the years, were sweet. He recalled a night with your skin against his, breathing each other in as if there were only you two in the world. Every time he closed his eyes to recall it, his heart ached for the feeling again. Yet, he couldn’t seek it out. 

As much as he was in love with the evocation, he could not drag you down into this whiskey-neat life of his. It might have been nice on the tongue for a while, but, ultimately, it was the type of influence he would not put anyone else under. You were good. Too good. Your personality was like candy, sweet to the core with an even more rich innermost part. Years had passed and, along with parts of the past, he couldn’t recall the days he lived now. All Ilya knew was that his nights were late, filled with the taste of bitter liqueur, and his days spent trying to recall what or who he had done. 

So, when you stood before him, eyes filled with intoxicating sweetness, with words of love dripping from your lips he couldn’t help but feel guilty. Did he lead you on somehow? Lull you into a false sense of goodness that made him worthy of any of your affection? You were too good for him, high on the good parts of life, and he had no plans to change into that any time soon. 

“I’m…erm,” Julian tried to clear his throat to get the words out. He saw the way your face fell, and it broke his heart. “I’m sorry.”

You turned away, hands going to the teapot on the stove, voice shaky, you replied, “I…I understand.”

Julian could hear that you didn’t believe your words, so he got up to make you look at him. There were tears in your eyes and Ilya wiped them away with his thumbs. 

Trying to smile, he explained himself. “Erm, uh, how do I say this?” After another moment, Julian decided it would be best to just get out rather than try to be nice about it. “Damn it, you deserve the world, beauty, and I do not wish to burden that comfortable world of yours.”

You stepped back, eyes looking everywhere but at him. Thinning your lips, you finally looked at him. “What makes you think you would be a burden?”

“Love, look how you live, it’s comfortable. Magical, truthfully. How I live is, uh, nothing of the sort. You wouldn’t want to have such a life,” He said. 

“I would,” You were quick to say. “If it was with you, Ilya, I would.”

Ilya, the way you said his name was a candy he could get addicted to. Shaking his head in an attempt to get the thought of you out, he decided it would be best to double down on the decision—whether or not it broke your heart or his. 

Finally, when you had enough of his explanation, you refused to let him speak anymore. Somehow, he found that worse than if you had told him you didn’t have feelings for him at all. Still, he relented since it was exactly what he had asked for. It was bitter-sweet to part with you in such a way. He could continue to drown his sorrows until dawn, and you could wake at that time without a worry about him.

When the door to the shop closed behind him, Julian looked at the Vesuvian streets and decided quickly it would be a night he would drown in a pint, just as the night before.

[freedomfireflies]

going anon for this just because i’m a little embarrassed about it lol

i’ve been feeling kind of weird lately because one of my favorite writers on here has started writing a lot of nonconsensual smut stuff. i know i’m well within my right to not read those specific pieces, as she does do her due diligence and provides content warnings, but something about it just makes me feel a little weird? and when i say nonconsensual smut, i mean like it’s harry’s character doing something nonconsensual with the reader or mc, but they end up being into it so it’s still framed as being “sexy.” i’m seeing these stories come up on my dash and i get excited to read them but then i read the content warning and just know that it’s gonna upset me, so i don’t. and it’s been starting to make me question my appreciation for this writer a bit. idk, do i sound ridiculous? do i just need to get over myself? as someone who writes a lot of smut and has dipped your toes into some kinkier stuff, haha, i thought you might have a better perspective on it :)

Omg hi my love!! Nothing to be embarrassed about, fanfic can be a huge part of discovering what we like and don't like, and if something makes you feel uncomfortable, you have every right to question it!

I'm so glad to hear there are content warnings, that's so important, especially for more taboo or kinkier topics!! And I'm so glad you know yourself enough to know not to read something that can upset you!!

I don't know which writer this is, but I can almost promise it's not done with any malicious intent! Sometimes we think we need to writer crazier things in our stories and smut in order to keep an audience! We want to write what no one else has so that way more people will read it and share! And maybe that's what they're doing!

Or maybe the idea is more about Harry introducing the mc to something they didn't realize they would like until it was brought up! And it wasn't intended to read as nonconsensual!

Obviously I don't know that for sure, and if at any point the mc has said the words, "No." and Harry still continued, that would definitely be crossing a very specific line! And would honestly make me uncomfortable, too!

I think you have every right to feel weird about it, especially if it's from an author you love to read from and enjoy following! I think you could message them and admit that you aren't super comfortable and see if they're purposefully writing it that way or if they're open to being more mindful going forward!

But if any author or story ever makes you feel uncomfortable, trust yourself and your instinct! There are some very strange things that get written about in this fandom and I'm even guilty of having written a couple myself! Sometimes we say it's because it's just fanfic and it's not real, but it can feel very real to people!

And if it puts a bad feeling in your stomach, follow that and do what you know is best for you! 💞 Maybe you can mute the author (filter their username) or even mute tags or words that they frequently use so you won't have to see it!!

Again, I'm so proud of you for recognizing this and not trying to force yourself to read anything you don't feel good about!! And I hope this helps even somewhat! If you ever want to talk privately, I'm always always here!!! 💞