#Love is a bliss so high I'm dying for it...

[delectible-granite]

I've made a mistake.

I'm terrified. Also free Stratoskate. Maybe I'll post more often... Who knows? Depends on my mood, I suppose.

[anundyingfidelity]

congrats first of all!!!! second of all can we have some butcher smut Please for the girls ?

thank you sm sweetieee <33 of courseee, my first billy butcher request! i love him lol hope i did him justice for this one, he's a very complicated character in my opinion haha this is soft, angsty smut with butcher for the girls😩🩷

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DON'T GO — Billy Butcher x female reader

Word count: 477.

Genre: soft, angsty smut.

Warnings: smut, p in v, unprotected sex.

The sound of his name, his real name, sweetly being pronounced with your voice was soothing and charming. For him, there wasn't any other than you who could have him swooning and dying for. He was addicted to all of you. To your moans, to your soft touch, how your nails would scratch his back as he fucked you slow and deep on your bed.

You bit back a loud whimper, his cock filling you up to the brim perfectly, focused on your pleasure rather than his own. Butcher wanted to see you squirm under him, to hear you cry his name once you came, so the only thing you had in mind was him.

And when he showed up that night at your door after months of no calls or visits, you cried. Then you slapped him in the face, and finally you hugged him tightly for disappearing so long. Butcher understood your reaction. He knew he deserved more than that, but yet here you were, with him hovering over your figure, spreading your legs, and kissing your lips to surpress your loud moans as he fucked you slow and passionate, like if you had all the time of the world to yourselves and give into each other.

"I love when you moan my name," he darkly mumbled against your neck, kissing and licking your skin, tasting the layer of sweat running down.

The contrast of his voice, his rough hands feeling every inch of your skin in the most delicate way would always get you amazed. Your hands moved to cup his cheeks and you pulled him for a wet kiss, rolling your tongue between his lips as he bucked his hips. You let out a moan against his mouth when one of his digits found your clit, rubbing you painfully slow.

"I fucking missed you," you gasped, breaking the kiss, feeling you were almost reaching that sweet high. "Oh, shit, I'm so close..."

"Fuck, I've missed you too, luv," he breathed out, giving you a particular hard thrust that forced another sweet sound from your throat.

He knew you were close. His raspy voice praised and encouraged you to let go. He wanted nothing more but to feel you cum around him. And when your walls clenched and your whole body began to tremble, he increased his own rhythm to get to heaven with you.

You sealed your love for him with a desperate kiss, not ever wanting to let go.

"Don't go like that again," you whispered.

Butcher caressed your cheek, taking in your beauty after the bliss of the reunion you had. He knew he had to leave again. That his world was too dangerous for you. But he was too much of a fool to admit it to you and break your heart, and instead he decided to lie.

"I won't."

[justporo]

Astarion owns property in my head at this point. Can I request for Astarion and Tav where they finally settle down after everything with the Absolute is over and has finally calmed down, and Tav immediately gets extremely sick. Nothing deadly, but still severe. After all the stress from the tadpoles and fighting for their lives, Tav's body kinda just gives out. I'd imagine Astarion would be at a complete loss at taking care of someone, let alone someone that sick lol probably gets scared they're dying too

Oh, Anon, I feel you. It's not that he lives in my head rentfree, no! He owns the building and makes ME pay the rent by now...

This request resonates a lot with me, today, because I'm frankly barely holding on atm, my stomach's acting up and I can't wait for the finishline for this week... so I too could actually use some Astarion taking care of me - although if that might help? Let's see! (Spoilers ahead)

This is pure ridiculous fluff btw. And thank you for the sweet request!

Pairing: Astarion / GN!Tav (You) Wordcount: 1,5k

Strawberry Sugar High

You hadn't left the bed for the better part of a week and you felt you had contracted most every kind of ailment that one could suffer from under this sun. You felt shaky and dizzy. Your limbs hurt and felt weak. Your stomach was in a weird limbo of feeling strange and barely allowing you to keep anything down. Radiating heatwaves making your whole body sweat came and switched places with icy chills so even the coziest of blankets couldn't stop you from shivering. You were down bad - and Astarion almost scaled the walls not knowing what to do with you or how to take care of you.

"My sweet, I brought you...", Astarion started to announce cheerfully as he opened the door to your bedroom with a bowl and a steaming mug in his hands. Then he saw how you had hogged every possible piece of fabric in your giant joint bed and had wrapped yourself in it. At the sight of it, Astarion's shoulders slumped visibly and with it his procured goods - which almost caused scorching hot tea to splash on the floor.

“…some fruit and tea”, he finished audibly distraught and walked over to sit somewhat next to where you had rolled up into a mess of sheets and blankets and were silently shivering. He carefully placed down mug and bowl on the nightstand before he turned to the pile that you had become.

“I really thought you were getting better, my love!” The sad and suffering puppy eyes he made at you almost made you think he was the one to be worried about.

“Y-you say t-that every-ytime you le-leave the room and co-ome back, A-Astarion”, you replied through shattering teeth which sadly took the edge off of your snide remark.

“I know, love. Because every time I hope you might would have started to feel better. But you’ve been like this for almost a week and yet no improvement in sight. You have me worried sick!”, he dramatically explained.

The shivers temporarily left your body to allow you to give Astarion a death stare – the audacity of this man. “I am so terribly sorry that I dare put you through th-this. Now please h-hand me the t-tea!”, you sarcastically replied and worked your hands out of the mountain of blankets to stretch them out towards the nightstand where the vampire had placed the mug.

Astarion handed you the mug. “Careful, it’s scorching ho…”, he said while you grabbed it from him and placed your palms around the hot ceramic and sighed at the bliss of warmth.

Astarion stared at you as if you had turned into an ox.

You took in the smell of the fresh brew and sighed again – pine needles, mint, chamomile, and a hint of lavender. You took a sip slowly because it was actually really hot and closed your eyes for a second. The hot drink temporarily made you feel better.

“You really got the right mixture down now, Astarion, thank you!”, you said as you opened your eyes again and smiled broadly at the vampire who had swung his legs onto the bed and crossed them by the ankles – bare feet sticking out of the pant legs – to sit beside you. At your compliment his face lit up, his eyes filling with sincere joy.

“Well, I’m happy to hear I am proficient at taking care of you, my sweet sick darling”, he said and raised one of his eyebrows in arrogant manner. “Well, let’s not forget the time when you didn’t strain the pine needles or when you tried to make mushroom soup and created bile”, you replied to his cocky demeanour and then took another sip of tea. The shivers were really calming down now.

Astarion’s mouth became a straight line. “Well, I am sorry, but it’s been over two hundred years since I last had to know my way around a kitchen – you’d be surprised how easily forgotten mundane things are”, he pouted but stretched out his arm to rub circles on your back – or what he thought must be your back under the thick padding of fabric.

You were fairly certain, Astarion had never really known his way around a kitchen, but you really didn’t want to rub it in since he was actually trying so hard to take care of you. And he had really been worried sick about you since it seemed he had also forgotten how much impact even a rather harmless sickness could have on a mortal body.

“Feeling better now?”, Astarion asked while he kept rubbing your back. This time there wasn’t a hint of sarcasm or arrogance in his tone, just a sincere, caring question.

“I am. Thank you, my heart”, you answered and turned a bit to him to give him another smile. “I guess after everything that happened my body was just in dire need of a break – and now forced me to take it. I guess in a few days I’ll be merrily dallying around again”, you spoke as you looked at Astarion but then spied past him to where you had seen something of interest in the bowl he had brought.

“I’m happy to hear that, my sweet, because I don’t know…”, the vampire replied with a smile then furrowed his brows as he saw your focus shift past him and you leaned to look behind him. He made to lean with you. “My beautiful eyes are up here, my love”, he murmured playfully.

But you craned your neck now to see what it was he had brought you – broad shoulders and handsome face be damned. “Gods, are those strawberries?” “Indeed, sweetheart.”

Your mouth opened and you stared at Astarion in anticipation: “Where did you get them? Those are not in season for a few more months! I love strawberries, they’re my favourite fruit, no, food!” Your eyes gleamed at the vampire who replied with a smug grin: “I know, darling. I am actually a good listener in case you hadn’t noticed yet.”

You stretched to give him a kiss which almost resulted in you falling over and spilling all of the remaining tea. Your heart filled with an incredible amount of joy – not only because there were strawberries to be had, but because you felt so seen by your soulmate. You smiled at Astarion. “Indeed, you are”, you happily cheered him. He smiled back just as warmly.

“I got them from a place where they magically empower the crops. It did almost cost me an arm and the rest of my dignity though, but here we are”, he explained jokingly to which you raised an inquisitive eyebrow at him.

“Feed me!”, you then demanded excitedly when he didn’t spill any more details. To which the vampire grinned even more broadly, showing his sharp fangs in the process. “Oh love, I am more than happy to indulge you in this pleasant reversal of roles”, he crooned and turned around to grab the bowl of fruit while you kept sipping on your herbal tea.

He grabbed one of the deep red fruits and slowly lifted it to your already excitedly opened mouth. You were almost salivating, as Astarion offered you the berry, holding it elegantly in his long, slender fingers. The fruit almost touched your lips, but then, at the last possible moment: the vampire flicked it in his own mouth with his thumb.

Your mouth stayed open but now in a desperate expression while Astarion chewed. His facial expression became confused then pleasantly surprised, not even looking at you for a moment. “Oh dear, these are actually rather good. I had almost also forgotten how good these taste. I haven’t eaten a strawberry in forever.” He gave a quick high-pitched laugh while still looking a bit confused. This certainly had awoken a memory he had probably thought lost forever. But still – weren’t these for you?

“Excuse me, my tragic darling vampire, I really love you rediscovering your love for these mortal pleasures known as fruit, but weren’t these meant to soothe my sufferings?”, you said and pouted at Astarion. He readily replied by finally offering you one – for real this time, while he smirked at you and stole another one for himself.

As you bit down the taste just about exploded in your mouth. They were perfectly delicious and sweet. You sighed blissfully and let your head fall back with closed eyes. You were definitely feeling better by the minute.

“So good! Thank you so much for getting them – I feel so much better already!”, you said to Astarion and shimmied over to him to first lean past him and put the mug on the nightstand and then hugging him – arms extending from your ball of blankets.

Astarion pressed a kiss to the crown of your head. “You’re welcome, my love. Now – share the rest?” “Only if you promise to get more tomorrow!”

The pale elf threw his head back and laughed. “If that is what it takes to nurse you back to health, I am more than happy to oblige, sweetheart”, he promised with a chuckle before he gave you another of the sweet berries and then popped another strawberry in his own mouth.

Author's note: Okay cool, where do I get strawberries now? Hope you enjoyed!

[nevernonline]

✧.* sweet disposition; hjs

the innocence of youth, isn't it blissful? your youth was your childhood crush, joshua. a pretty boy from your hometown who became your best friend.

✧ paring: non-idol! joshua x fem! reader

✧ genre/s: high school crush! joshua, f2l.

✧ word count: 4.0k

✧ warning/s: swearing, kissing, some smutty scenes, mentions of substances (alcohol&weed mainly) mentions of illness, minors dni.

✧ note/s: sweet disposition by temper trap is one of my all time fav songs, and i was watching old sytycd episodes for my soul and when I heard it I knew I had to write a silly little fic. also def unedited so sorry. atp I'm just making a svt song series. lol. ily.

When he first met you in high school Joshua knew he liked you, something about your soft smile and ease of fitting into every social situation made him want to be your friend.

You were a transfer student from a public school into his much more prestigious private one and almost automatically fit in with everyone.

He admired you for that, but it wasn’t until the first year of knowing you passed that he realized he loved you.

You were sitting on a bench watching him and his team practice for a big lacrosse match, well not exactly watching the boys play and run around the field. But, sitting on a bench reading one of those romance novels you loved, like Wuthering Heights or some Jane Austen novel. Something about them made you invested in reading, Joshua tried, but he couldn’t shake the fact that someone in a period romance is dying of the plague or having a maid clean out their chamber pot before the rest of the royals arrive.

He was distracted by you more than ever that day. your glasses were changed into contacts, your legs longer, and your hair plaited into braids on each side of your head tied together with matching blue hair bands.

You felt your ears burning as you looked up from your novel, finding Joshua standing in the center of the field as the opposing team members scored a goal on his side and celebrated, but he was stuck. Stuck in a moment of noticing you before the coaches whistle dragged him out of his dream state.

He never confessed his feelings for you, not yet. He didn’t want to seem selfish now that you weren’t the nerdy girl he once met, but a girl transitioning into her own womanhood. Well, at least on the outside.

Time seemed to pass whenever you were with him and suddenly he realized it was the start of your senior year, just like that Joshua was back dreaming about asking you to the homecoming dance, a dance that you helped organize.

Joshua had an entire day planned to ask you on your first date, he would come over carrying a bouquet of flowers, carrying a dress in your favorite shade of blue, and him in his matching suit. He made dinner reservations and even made a book of things he loved about you, like your own Austen novel just from him.

When he rang your doorbell, a familiar face answered, but it wasn’t yours it was Soonyoung from his lacrosse team, dressed in a white suit adorned with a red sash, a sash he came to find out matched your beautiful long dress, and even the small flower placed in your hair.

A missed chance, now he looked like a fool standing in your doorway, but he lied. He just lied and told you that he needed your help asking someone else to the dance. Aside from the book he made, all the effort he put in for you was wasted on someone else.

After all was said and done, Joshua was happy you ended up going with Soonyoung. You were smiling, laughing, and dancing with someone who deserved your happiness. He was a nice guy, as nice as you were.

The book that Joshua made for you was still in his closet at his parents house, just like the rest of your memories together.

A few days later his flight landed on the route back to you. Stepping off the plane a gush of warm air and the smell of peaches hit his nose, something about it felt like you and that stupid peach flavored lip gloss you always wore.

Joshua looked around the airport feeling that maybe you would be here too, but he knew that you were off with your friend celebrating her birthday for the next two nights.

His mom pulled up on the curb in her black suv, greeting him with a comfortably tight hug and a small peck on the cheek and he was home.

He tried to ask her about you, maybe seeing if she had any information on where you went or if you were single, but she had no idea. She just told him to be patient and ask when he saw you.

After two days of going around to all of his old favorite places, some closed or turned into boutique clothing or vape shops, he still was met with the emptiness of not seeing you yet.

On that second night at home he met up with his friends and some of their significant others at a new bar that just opened a few months prior, to catch up and also to distract him from you, just for one night at least.

A few hours went by and his buzz grew stronger, he felt guilty he hadn’t thought about you most of his night, but why should he?

Soonyoung took the open space on the red leather couch next to Joshua and sat down two shots of tequila, a ritual for the two of them to keep their buzz going.

“What’s gotten into you tonight, Shua? You seem sad.”

“Uh, nothing I guess I just missed being here. I miss you guys.”

“Aw, we missed you too, but I don’t think that’s it. What’s going on?”

“I haven’t seen y/n yet, I’m nervous I guess?”

“Of course. You had the biggest crush on her, sorry for taking her to that dance.”

“No, it’s okay. I just- Well, I guess it’s dumb to be nervous. We still talk every day, but I just haven't seen her in real life in too long. It’s just weird I guess.”

“Are you still in love with her?”

“I don’t know, maybe. She’s probably just moved on from me.

“Is it eating you up inside? Wait, that's a dumb question clearly it is. You think she’s dating someone?”

“I’m not sure, I don’t think so. Unless you know something I don’t.”

“Na, last time I saw her she sat in the corner of the room on her phone the whole time texting you.”

“Really? See, she doesn’t even tell me when she goes out to parties.”

“Are you that jealous? You know y/n, she’s not like that, Joshua, stop getting weird and in your head about it.”

Soonyoung handed Joshua his phone that was placed face down on the table and then handed him a shot of liquid courage.

“Call her, ask her out. Don’t be a bitch.”

“You're right, thanks Hosh.”

Pulling up your contact information on his phone, two rings in you picked up, clearly half asleep from just getting back home.

“Shua? Hi, sorry I got home an hour ago. What are you doing?”

“Oh my god, sorry I woke you. I was just calling to see if you wanted to hangout tomorrow? I was thinking maybe Leslie’s for lunch and then the arcade or something?”

“Yeah, should I pick you up or meet you?”

“You can meet me, if that's okay? I’m going to a church thing with my mom, I’ll have her drop me off.”

“Sure, I’m going to go back to bed now okay? I promise I’ll be less tired tomorrow, Love you.”

“Okay y/n, I’ll see you then, okay? Sleep good, love you.”

“Oh, and Shua.”

“Yes?”

“Don’t let Soony give you too many shots okay? Save some alcohol room in your belly for me.”

“I promise, night angel.”

“Night, loverboy.”

Joshua’s nerves were beginning to get the best of him as he walked into the dim light of the italian restaurant and informed the host that he was here meeting his friend, as he was being ushered to the back he saw you seated at a small corner table, lit with a candle, wearing a slick black top and a pair of matching pants, a simple denim jacket was placed over your shoulders shielding you slightly from the air conditioning.

“Hi.”

You got up from your spot against the wall and greeted Joshua with a big hug when your giggles filled his ears realizing you were both dressed in nearly the same outfit.

“I see you got the memo, Joshua.”

“I see you still copy me after all this time.”

Gesturing for you both to sit back down, he noticed how casual you were after all this time spent apart, possibly just as a front knowing soon he’ll be back to teasing you once he snaps out of his awkwardness.

“So, how's your dad? Is everything okay?”

“He’s alright, he’s been in remission for a few months now.”

“I’m happy to hear that, really. I always loved your dad.”

The waitress came over at a perfect moment, a chance for Joshua to collect his thoughts and place an order for a bottle of wine to calm his quick heartbeat.

“So you have a boyfriend?”

“No, I’m too busy with med school and taking care of my dad to date, you know that. What’s with the weird questions? You want to know the next time I’m supposed to be on my period too? You sound like my mom.”

“Sorry, I just-”

And just like that, the waitress made her second entrance, bringing along the bottle of red liquid and your two meals, delaying Joshua’s chance once again to ask you his set of weird questions.

He let the moment pass while the two of you ate in silence and each had a glass to ease the awkward tension now lingering over your table.

“So-”

You both spoke up at the same time, you decided to let him finish his thought first.

“Okay, wait I just thought of another question. Why did you take Soonyoung to the dance and not go with me?”

“Because I had a crush on him, duh.”

“No way you had a crush on him? He used to pick his boogers and wipe them on his jeans.”

“I’m kidding. He was just a good friend, I was too shy to ask the guy I wanted so I asked him instead.”

“Who was the guy? Jun from your biology class? He was cute.”

“No, he was cute. But, this dude's name was like Joshua Honk or something, not sure if you knew him.”

“You had a crush on me?”

“Obviously, but you’re kind of a fucking idiot.”

“Okay, well how do you feel about me now?”

“This is the first time I’ve seen you in years and you're asking me what I think about you?”

“Yep, I need to know why I was your secret sexy crush.”

“Disgusting.”

“I’m waiting.”

You looked Joshua up and down, his hair was longer than normal, his eyes still big and wide, catching every glimmer of light inside of them like a cluster of stars, his lips were turned into a toothy smile. He was perfect.

“I think you’re okay.”

“Just okay? Damn. Whatever.”

“Want to take some dessert to go? I think we have some unfinished business.”

Waving over the waitress and paying your bill as she picked up your box of tiramisu, you and Joshua ran down the streets where you grew up to the very arcade you’d spend hours in after school.

“Okay, the winner gets what? I think we’re betting with more than tickets these days.”

“Well, y/n. I’m glad you asked. How about if I win, I get to take you home with me and if you win you get to take me home.”

“Seems like we’d both be getting what you want out of it.”

“Are you saying you don’t want to be with your super sexy secret lover, Shua Honk?”

“Win, and you’ll find out.”

“You’re on, but I’ll warn you I’m very good in bed.”

“Horny and sarcastic and horny very interesting combination for you, Honk.”

“Shut up and play.”

After hours of playing multiple games around the arcade you and Joshua were tied and his anxiety had been eased, all that stood between him and winning was a game of ski ball, a game which you were notoriously bad at.

“Need help with your game, y/n?”

A nod from you made Joshua push his chest against your back and wrap his arm around your waist, the other one held your hand helping you aim the ball on the black trackpad, a pull of your hips backwards into his sent a strong vibration down to your panties, that were now as wet as the saliva burning in your mouth.

“50 points? Not bad for a rookie.”

“You threw me off.”

“You really think you would’ve won even if I didn’t help you?”

“Well maybe if you weren’t so distracting, yes.”

“I was just trying to help.”

“What? By thrusting into my ass?”

“I didn’t thrust? You pushed your ass into me?”

“No, I did not, you clearly made contact first.”

“Okay, well then that was a practice round, prove you can win with no help. I'll buy all your drinks tonight and if you lose, open your wallet, rich girl.”

“Fine, try to control the friend in your pants, loser.”

Joshua wanted to respond with some sarcastic remark not promising anything from the way he was watching you bed over to roll the ball from behind, but he decided to shut up and let you win, he wouldn’t have you paying for him anyway.

“You let me win, but I will be taking the drinks.”

“How did you know?”

“You threw the ball backwards twice to skip your turn, you’re good at many things but subtly is not one of them.”

“Okay, but still let me buy the drinks.”

“You were always going to pay anyway, I’m not wasting my cold hard cash on you, california boy”

“Ha-ha, very funny.”

Walking into the familiar dive bar you spent many late nights in after studying, you were hit with the sweet smell of beer and the crunching of peanut shells under your feet. You caught a glimpse of Joshua looking around at the various world flags on the wall.

“What? Not fancy enough for you?”

“No, I love it. I didn’t even know this was here?”

“Yeah, my dad told me about it. He comes with me sometimes to watch soccer, it’s cozy.”

“Sit down, I’ll go and order what would you like?”

“Just grab me a beer, maybe with a lime wedge?”

“And a shot?”

“Ugh, fine Joshua but I do not want to be responsible for carrying your drunk ass home.”

“No promises.”

Joshua strolled up to the wooden bar, greeted by the big man with facial hair behind it and placed the two matching orders, a shot of tequila and a beer with lime.

“You’re here with y/n?”

“Oh, y/n? Yeah, you know her?”

“I know her dad, good man. You her boyfriend?”

“No, just her friend. Nice to meet you..”

“Alan.”

“Alan, hey. I’m Josh.”

Alan shook Joshua’s outstretched hands and denied his card from being swiped for the alcohol.

“It’s on the house, if you’re friends with the y/l/n’s you’re friends with me. Enjoy and treat our girl well, if you’re the Joshua she tells me about, then I hope she gets her happy ending.”

“Wait what does that mean?”

“Oh, nothing you can’t figure out for yourself.”

Walking back over to your small bar table, Joshua decided to take the spot directly next to you in the booth and not across the table, maybe to hear you better and maybe so he can figure out what Alan was putting down.

“You met Alan?”

“Yeah, he told me to take care of you.”

“He’s protective, he normally scares the weird drunkards away from my table."

“I’m playing your bodyguard tonight, cheers.”

Throwing back your shot, you tried to calm the burning taste of alcohol from showing on your face, Joshua held up a slice of line to your lips and let you bite down on it before placing it between his.

“Ew, why didn’t you just use your own lime.”

“Oh, I don’t know. Sorry.”

“Want to kiss me that bad huh?”

“What are you talking about?”

You slapped his arm, taking a swig of your fresh beer.

“It was a joke, be quiet.”

“I do want to kiss you.”

“Oh, right. Okay, save the jokes. You don’t have to tease me for my crush anymore. I get it.”

“Do you still like me?”

“ I probably always will. At least some part of me. Why do you ask?”

“ I don't know, I asked you before what you like about me so do you want to know what I like about you?”

“My body?”

“No, but that doesn’t hurt. I like how kind you are. I like that everyone who meets you falls in love with you instantly because you’re so charming. I love that when you laugh or cry too hard you start wheezing a little bit because you’re embarrassed that someone could see you like that. I love that you, even after all this time, have the nicest heart of anyone I’ve ever met.”

A tear fell down from your eye, and Joshua’s long finger came up to cup your cheek, wiping it away with his thumb.

“Why are you crying?”

“I’m sorry. I just missed you.”

“You know I have something for you, it’s old but I've never had the chance to give it to you.”

Joshua pulled the brown leather bound notebook from his bag that had a laminated front titled ‘ The Girl from Nowhere.’

“What is this? Did you write a book?”

“Remember the night of the dance when I showed up at your house?”

“Yeah, when you needed me and Hosh to help you ask Suki?”

“Right. Well, I was actually there to ask you, but I saw Soonyoung and I couldn’t. He’s too good of a friend and you were happy. So, I lied. I actually had a dress for you to match me and this book. I wrote it for you because you were so obsessed with all those books, so it’s your own Austen novel.”

“You wrote me my own romance book?”

“Yeah, it’s outdated now, but it ended with me kissing you after the dance.”

You couldn’t believe your eyes, it was the most thoughtful thing he’d ever given you or anyone for that matter.

“Joshua, this is so nice. Seriously, when did you even have time to do this?”

“My mom gave me the idea. You and her always watched Pride and Prejudice together, she has the same taste. So technically it’s co-written by her, but she gave me all the credit.”

“Wow. I don’t really know what to say.”

“You don’t have to say anything.”

“Okay, then I’ll be right back. Give me like two minutes, don’t move.”

You peeled yourself off of Joshua and strutted up to Alan to ask a favor before running back to your table.

Suddenly the only lighting in the room was coming from the sporting matches on the flat screens and a few neon branded signs as a song Joshua hadn’t heard in years played over the speakers, Sweet Disposition by Temper Trap.

“Joshua Hong, will you do me the pleasure of dancing with me?”

“You’re so corny.”

“Get up, you’re embarrassing me. Let it happen.”

As the song rang through the speakers, he wrapped his hands around your lower back and pulled you in tightly, swaying you to the perfect song to describe falling in love in his youth, with the only person he ever pictured by his side. His own version of a romance novel.

You pulled away slightly as the beat got faster and grabbed his hands, running around to the other patrons in the familiar bar, crushing sounds of peanut shells under your feet.

Suddenly the whole bar was dancing along with you to the sound of nostalgia, even Alan was behind the bar top swaying along and singing into a broom.

It was this charm, the charm only you had to get the entire group of people dancing along with you.

After the song ended Alan handed out a round of shots and you took back your respective seats.

“Thank you, y/n.”

“Why are you thanking me?”

“You made a weird childhood dream of mine come to life, it’s stupid, but it’s the truth.”

“It’s not stupid. And you did the same for me so it was only fair, want to go?”

“I’m not done with you yet.”

“I know, but there’s somewhere else we have to go.”

“Are you okay to walk?”

“Honk, I am not the lightweight here. I should be asking you that.”

“I am not a lightweight.”

“Okay, stand up.”

“Give me one second.”

“Exactly. Come on.”

Waving goodbye to Alan and the rest of the team at the bar, you pulled a very drunk Joshua down the old streets of your hometown, until you reached the best park bench in town.

It was older than both of you and maybe even your parents, carved with names and years of all the couples who sat right here. It was your favorite spot, even as a kid.

You and Joshua have a countless number of photos together on the very wood you sat upon now, staring at the calm sight of the nearby lake.

“Remember when we ditched that weird one year reunion party to come sit here?”

“Yeah, you had a joint that some weird guy dressed as a hotdog gave you.”

“Yes, it was someone that knew Soony, not sure why but his nickname is Dino? We just sat here all night and smoked it. So, I may have gotten his contact from someone and picked up a couple.”

“Y/N you did not.”

“Yes, it’s in my purse. I’m not letting you smoke it though, you’re too drunk. So it’s just a prop, but-“

Out of your small leather bag, you pulled a perfectly rolled joint and held it up to Joshua's face.

“I thought it’d be funny to bring one, that was the first time I ever took a hit so it’s special.”

“You know most people have their first kiss on this bench, not their first joint.”

“I had my first kiss in sixth grade at a roller rink, this is more important.”

“A roller rink? What the hell.”

“Yeah, a story for another time.”

Joshua grabbed the brown wrapped object from your hand and pulled a match box from Leslie’s out of his pocket.

“For old times sake?”

“Fine, but you really need to stop talking like you're in your eighties.”

With the strike of the match and the smell of sulfur hit your nose and the flame between you ignited. A corny thought, but it was the truth.

Taking in a large inhale and holding it in your lungs before passing it off to Joshua, you sat and stared at the blue water.

“By the way, I like everything about you just so you know. I was being stupid before. I think you’re maybe the only person in the world I’ve ever trusted.”

As the flower kept passing between you, Joshua scooted closer, resting his hand on your clothed thigh awfully close to the crease of your pelvis.

“Me too. Not about myself, about you. Tonight proved to me that moving back was the right choice.”

“Wait, you're back for good? Why the fuck didn’t you tell me earlier?”

“Would that have changed tonight?”

“Yeah, I would’ve probably been in your bed by now. I was too scared to confess how I felt. But, fuck I’m in love with you. I always have been.”

Choking on the cloud of smoke in his lungs, Joshua stuck the small roach of the joint in his pocket and kissed you.

“Does that mean I can take you home?”

“I don’t fuck on the first date.”

“Classy girl, I like that.”

“You’re so annoying.”

“I love you too.”

“So when’s the second date? Tomorrow?”

“Yeah, come sleep over on the couch and we can go for breakfast.”

“The couch? Like a dog?”

“ My dog sleeps in my bed.”

“Kick her out for one night, I reserved the spot first.”

“Okay, let’s go. No funny business, Honk.”

“Can we brainstorm a cuter nickname, I don’t know like Hunk?”

“No, Honk stays. Let’s go to bed.”

Holding hands and kissing at stop lights on your way, he was back and you were never letting him go again.

[destielfanfic]

Group Ask #213

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Ask #1 ( @miraculousfailure): there’s this fic…#1

I’m looking for a fic where Dean is dating Lisa and they move into a house with Ben next to Cas who is married with a kid and a baby on the way. Dean and Cas immediately become best friends. I believe that his wife ends up dying after giving birth. She is a painter in the fic. Dean and Cas get matching tattoos in it at one point. The fic is pretty long. Probably 100k+. Would appreciate finding this so much! Found by @chiops256 and @caseyjw1973! So it Goes by raiseyourpinky [NC-17, 236,500 word count] Dean Winchester has finally bought his white picket fence dream house for his girlfriend Lisa and their son Ben. On top of living in the perfect neighborhood, they now have the best neighbors, the Novaks. Castiel and Amelia Novak are awaiting their first baby, Claire. They’re in love and are not afraid to show it. When their new neighbors move in next door, they become practically family. It feels as though nothing could ruin the ultimate domestic bliss Dean and Castiel have achieved. Until it all goes to hell. Then the two of them will be the only ones left to pick up all of the broken pieces and keep each other moving forward. Dean and Castiel soon realize that the only thing stronger than tragedy and pain is the love that they have for each other. Unfortunately, the fic has been deleted by the author.

Ask #2 ( @loveagoodstory2 ): there’s this fic…#2

Hello I’m looking for a one shot please. Dean is an omega and works the night shift in an office building. He smells Cas scent and loves it they start leaving notes for each other and Cas leaves Dean his tie (scented by him Completely 😉) Found by @caseyjw1973! Scent of an Accountant by Andromytta, nealinor [NC-17, 7,000 word count] Omega Dean Winchester has taken a temporary position as a security guard in a high rise office building. His first night on the job, he finds one particular office suffused with a scent that fascinates him. Fascination builds and soon Dean crosses into the office space of an unknown alpha. The one thing he didn't consider: what would happen when the alpha scents him in return.

Ask #3 (Anon 1 ): there’s this fic…# 3

I'm looking for a fic where Dean and Cas first meet while having a threesome with Lisa -- there's a followup fic where Dean and Cas reunite after many years, with Dean now out of the closet and eager to pursue a relationship with Cas. It was on AO3, though not sure if it's still there. Found by @kazshero and @chiops256! Light Me Up series by tricia_16 [NC-17, 219,000 word count, 3 parts] Summary of the part 1 - In a desperate attempt to save his dying relationship with Lisa, Dean Winchester agrees to invite another man into their bedroom. He’s always considered himself to be completely straight... so why does being with this Cas guy feel so good?

Other requests

Ask #4 - our follower is looking for a possibly deleted fic, “Castiel Takes Care of Dean Winchester” by asexualclassicist on AO3.

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Ask #6 - our follower is looking for a possibly deleted fic “Castiel’s Scars” by Martypom.

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It takes a village to find a lost fic, every reblog is appreciated! All 3 fics have been found!!! Great job, team!

[dragon-chica]

Wednesday Addams General NSF W Headcanons

Fandom: Wednesday

Warnings: Rough sex and kinks, fully consensual harm, idealization of death, it's Wednesday.

Bloodplay is one of her favorite activities. She loves seeing your skin covered in beautiful crimson and licking it off of you, the way your breath heaves as she becoming enamored with a simple cut and her blown pupils staring up at you while her tongue swipes across it.

"I've always enjoyed the phrase 'sticks and stones may break my bones, but chains and whips excite me.' don't you agree?" she says eyeing you up, a hint for later perhaps.

Choking. To the point of where she's about to/may pass out. She imagines you're really ending her, in the throws of bliss and dying by the hands of her true love.

Flogging or whips, she doesn't care for spanking but loves the marks or sometimes welts left behind.

Gods does she love to torment you, but she takes as well as she gives. From drawing everything out as long as possible to literally tormenting you.

She's not one for marking where others can see, and isn't happy when you happen to leave visible marks on her, but she's incredibly possessive and believes it should already be clear that she doesn't share.

You two switch regularly. Even if you usually are into bottoming, there's something about the way she's so prideful and stubborn that goads you into giving her a taste of her own medicine, and reveling in how she eventually crumbles for you.

She is a brat. You're not entirely sure if she's trying to piss you off into taking it out on her, or if she really thinks herself to be so high and mighty trying to talk down to you while she's pinned and handcuffed and your mercy but you remind her soon enough.

Overstimulation. Pain and pleasure, pleasure until it becomes pain is her favorite part. Bringing you the relief of a hard won orgasm then not letting up until you're begging her, that's it's too much. That it hurts. But you were just pleading for her not to stop? To give you more? She's only doing as you asked.

When you do the same to her it's so satisfying to watch her crack. It takes time and patience to make her fall apart but you've learned her weaknesses as well as she knows yours.

Very sarcastic and sadistic, talking down to you.

She's not into voyeur or other's seeing or knowing what you do together. You're hers. To know and have. You're dating an Addams, and that means devotion.

Her hobby of experimenting with sex largely includes her love of torture methods. Slightly adjusted for your enjoyment, but she's willing to try the real thing if you'll do it to her. She can take it. She gives you a challenging stare if you falter.

Honestly you probably find some of the things she's into pretty concerning. You trust her to not truly harm you, which shows a lot, but she wants you to do some hardcore things to her that are hardly sexual and just seem like she has a pain kink that's a little too far.

Waxplay. Specifically with vampire tear candles, but red will also do. She likes it to be candlelit anyway so it's convenient as well.

Wednesday can be sort of clinical in her observations at times. She likes to know exactly what makes you tick and will makes notes from time to time. You're scared to know what's actually in that book.

Bondage. Probably the biggest thing you do is tying each other up and having your way. From intricate shibari to antique manacles that hang in her room presumably for 'decoration'.

If you have a dick she would be ruthless with cock and ball torture. If you don't have a pain kink, you likely would soon without ever having expected it.

She loves the intimacy of knowing exactly what makes her partner tick and plans to learn everything about you.

I lied. I said I was going to work on other characters for a bit. Here's this. I'm sure I could go on, but that's all for now.

[kai-anderson-whore]

about your post where you say you wanna write about austin, charles or alex: i can only think about smut and im dying for a fic with female edging where she is stimulated for a very long time with a vibrator, some pussy slaps and/or whipping, and fingering itself. I wasn't thinking of any character in particular but this doesn't really fit charles😂lol

Thank you for the idea again this is super short due to work but it’s juicy and smutty

Beautiful disaster (Austin sommers x fem reader smut)

Warnings: smut, edging, fingering, vibrator, pussy slaps, cum denial,

Word count: 724

•¤❅¤•.•°˚˚°•..•°˚˚°•.•¤❅¤•.•¤❅¤•.•°˚˚°•.

The tears streamed down your face, your eyes begging Austin to give in to your needs. But all he did was smirk wickedly at your current state like a beautiful disaster. Your chest raised and fell rapidly, your throat in pain from all the desperate pleas and moans that bubbled within you. "Please Austin I'm begging you please let me cum" you cried out wriggling your hips but Austin removed the vibrator from your swollen clit.

A frustrated whine left your lips for the hundredth time tonight. Every time you were dangerously close to the edge Austin would remove the vibrator from your engorged clit chuckling to himself. Your skin felt hot and red from the pleasure and frustration Austin was giving you, you wanted to cum so desperately you would do anything.

"Austin please let me cum I'm begging you please" you pleaded with him. Austin just looked at you like he was considering it but you knew he wouldn't give in to you that easily especially when he's in his naughty, mischievous mood. With each time Austin brought the vibrator to your clit you were reaching your orgasm quicker than before. "I would let you cum but... I love seeing you beg me with those tears" his eyes examined your body from how flustered your face was to the arousal seeping out your pussy.

He brought his hand to your wet core running his index finger along your folds to your clit circling the throbbing bundle of nerves teasingly. Your legs shaking from what felt like hours of edging a desperate whine leaving your lips quickly overtaken by a loud gasp as his palm slapped your pussy a few times. God did it feel so good you thought bucking your hips to his hand desperate for anything to cum.

Austin removed his hand from you just kneeling on the bed watching you. You brought your hand down to your clit trying to get yourself off. "Ah, ah, ah no touching or else I'll have to tie you up again" he warned a huff left your lips. You put both your hands under you so you couldn't attempt to touch yourself like Austin instructed. "Good girl" he hummed bringing the vibrator back to your clit.

Your eyes scrunching shut, your mouth hung open letting all the whines, moans and whimpers fall freely. You hoped and prayed that Austin would let you cum your hips bucking up Austin held pink toy securely on your throbbing clit. Your legs shaking almost violently from the desperation a audible moan left your lips feeling Austin slip two fingers inside you with his other hand.

His fingers curled inside you hitting that one stop that is bound to make you come undone underneath him. You we’re dangerously close to the edge once again, Austin could tell that wicked smirk never leaving his lips. Your body wriggling chasing your high quicker “please Austin please let me cum” you begged you couldn’t take it anymore so desperate for your release.

“Cum for me” he hummed turning the vibration up higher and pumping his fingers faster. The second he said those words you let go. Your orgasm ripped throw you like a ton of bricks your back arched, your eyes rolled back a moan almost like a scream escaped you. Coating Austin’s fingers with your release your legs still shaking with the overstimulation as Austin continues to pump his fingers into you riding out your blissful release.

“No more Austin I can’t take it” you whined pulling away from his touch. Austin pulled the vibrator and his fingers away from your aching pussy. He admired you for a brief moment “you did so well for me” he hummed placing a kiss on your lips. You felt exhausted your eyes threatening to fall shut. “Tired?” He asked moving your hair that stuck on your face from the tears away, you nodded your head a yawn escaped you. “Get some rest I’ll clean up” he replied letting you drift off into slumber.

[slickchickchocolatier]

S E 7 E N : L U C I F E R

P A R T 1 N E

WARNINGS: Monsters battling, demons and angels, religious elements, accurate and inaccurate references, fantasy, dark lore, thriller vibes, not proofread (i know i'm terrible) and scary images......

READ THIS!

Okay, so you all remember that post i made recently where i apologized in advance for some images i was altering to display the face Heelel makes in a particular scene? well.....thats in this chapter and ngl....it's going to give you creepy pasta vibes. so please, read at your own risk, it is a good read but if you get scared easily, just dont scroll all the way through at the bottom of this page (it's at the very end) just know, i had to alter a pic to show you guys just how i imagined his face was like in that partcular scene. and yes....it IS in fact a picture of Heeseung....i just altered the contrast and brightness of it. so please, dont be afraid of Heelel...I promise it gets better....just...dont judge him quite yet. lol.

Also, in case the song is still going by the time you read the caption that says "End song here" just cut it off because its a rather long song....but also....its going to kill the mood of the remaining chapter if you keep playing it. its only supposed to play during a special moment.

last but not least....

💙

You know who you are and you know what that means ;) I hope this will make your day. Stay positive and happy! <3

Air crowded by the souls of the lifeless metallic forms that lay in gruesome peace on paved grounds. 

It was a pathetic sight for the people to behold of their homeland, such a shame that a scenic nation had to be remembered as such during this turbulent time where humans, angels and demons were all engulfed in war, battling over the survival of man, the pride of angels, and the love of demons. 

The battle had been ferocious, each Hellish Prince displayed their thunderous roar into the open atmosphere, yet despite slaying many, there were much more that descended, to replenish those that lay as bits of shrapnel. 

They plundered down, and lined themselves to guard their enormous leader, the guide of angels, who rises above all things man made, the archangel Jol. Glaring with a hatred persona in his eye, his attention is distracted by the fearsome contender that matches….maybe even outweighs his ferocity. 

The blue sky that beheld what could only be described as an illuminating palace for the Heavens, was now stained fierce red, in mourning for the lives lost of those who had been selected without reason…dying in the name of one man’s corruption. 

The scent of death ascending and piercing the blissful appearance of the clear sky, it reeked of metal and city air. In smothered bits and pieces, the angels that sought out your tortured screams and torn flesh, have lost a great deal at the hands of the princely brethren from Hell. Yet you feared that the end was nowhere near at the sight of the opposing end, the angels, increasing by high numbers as they migrate down from the sky. 

Alas, such was the deceitful decree of men with corrupt hearts and lustful eyes. The very thesis of evil and sin in the form of mortal flesh, claiming to be of holy virtue and a civil servant of Gods name. 

Pointing and issuing the blasphemous words to the skull headed princes before you, one man, Senator Forras, condemns them to forever reside in Hell and to never return to Gods holy land.

Little does he know, that the land we humans had set our mark on, the very grounded paths we trailed and the oceans we sailed, all blessed with the kiss of the Suns rays, was created by the one he displays hostility towards. The one whose name is forever shamed in the scriptures of the Holy Bible, and tainted with persona of cruel evil and fearful sin….Lucifer.

“He created the Sun…right after God created the moon, along with this world. It was his gift to God…”

Nikis retelling echoes in your head. He told you of the wondrous creations that took place years beyond the human mind could ever measure, it remained just as shocking as it had been when you first learned of it….that the vital sources of human life were created by both, God…and the Devil. 

Watching from afar, your eyes fully adjust into the wide-open stratosphere, where the Devil’s colossal form reaches past the clouds, glowering a beaming red stare at his opponent who stood nearly of equal stature. Both giants readied themselves. 

Perhaps you were thinking too much into it, yet you wondered if Heeseung made the first move in order to propel the towering archangel backwards and away from your location as you remained chained on stage at the city’s center. 

Colliding back into the open waters of the sea, the massive limbs, wings, and almighty roars of the two beasts can be seen and heard as their staggering forms wrestle in the saltwater, completely away from all human forms that hid themselves on land. 

Witnessing the greatness of their power, the beastly entities unleash a spectacular display of combat, though it lacked the decency of sportsmanship as the archangel, reacting to the upper hand the Devil gained, Jol calls out to his posse of followers, hence turning the tables. 

They respond to his cry and suspend their bodies into the air, spearing through the clouds as their lustrous bodies glistened by the last bit of sunlight that remained as dawn approaches. 

They format an air-raid as they aim their direction of flight to Heeseung. Harpooning through the air with high velocity, you watched at how each Angel morphs into that of a sharpened spear. Taking aim, they dive into him, penetrating through regions of flesh as they pierce through him one by one. 

Despite gaining the attacks from the thousands of metallic forms that targets him, he stands fearless and makes his power be known through his roar. The vibration and terrifying power of his clamor shakes the life out of the metallic angels that had reached close proximity. 

Yet the almighty howl of the Devil was not enough, as the angels relentlessly come in, swooping by in a recycling effect as they take turn in diving in. 

The moment you heard the stinging screech of the angels from above, you knew that they had ascended to aid their dark ruler. 

The six princes, all gather around their elder brother and master, raging fury and destruction to the offensive line as they kept coming in, only to fly directly to their deaths as Sunoo destroyed their hearts from within, or when Jays insects multiplied and took out an entire formation. 

Between their individual powers, along with the enhanced capabilities of their demonic forms, each brother became invincible as they successfully defended their King from further damage. Compared to the angels, whose numbers have reached up to thousands, there were only 6 brothers to fend off the tackling creatures as Heeseung remains squared to Jol. 

Regardless of the ratio, the fight remained unfair as each Prince took on multiple heads at a time, sealing the fate of angels by rows, groups, or any measure of high numbers as they all seemed to have diminished within minutes, leaving only the two behemoths standing, ready to establish the victor. 

Narrowing his red eyes, Heeseung’s form, which displayed a great humanoid structure that adorned the head of the Cervidae species, crowned with the magnificent flaunt of tall antler-horns. His wings reflect the colors of his tainted soul, dreaded in black with a tinge of purple and dark blood hues of red. A total difference from the ash-gray scheme that the others had, but not just the angels. The faithful younger brothers had also adorned the same colored wings that issued them the gift of flight. 

You watched as Jol takes in a panicked stance, preparing to lunge towards his opponent, against the waves of the ocean bottom they stood on. 

With a loud screech as he formulated saws with his own hands, he equips himself with a series of  weapons, bearing his arms with anything and everything the human mind could think of. 

‘I told you before….to leave them be…yet you ignored my warning…disregarded my decree. Furthermore…...you took it too far….you crossed the line…you came down from his kingdom, behind his back….to kill her….all for the sake of your stupid pride….you should have heeded my demand…and not mettle with humans…she may be mortal…but I promise you…she is nothing like the rest of them….she’s mine.’

Without a roar or an inch of movement, the Devil stands glorified in his demonic form as he waits, welcoming the fellow archangel to present his best shot.

‘Come on…go ahead. I’m waiting….you’re not going to get out if this….because of what you came for…because of what you had intended to do….because……of what you imagined on doing….to her…’

With a fearsome leap, Jol, in his mighty form plunges forward, presenting every blade, aiming it at Heeseung.

"One chance...you've got one shot...so make it count. Equip yourself and bear your arms with whatever you need...if you want to live.....then you better make it count...otherwise.....I WILL BURN YOU."

Wings spread, mouth open, screeching out a fierce cry as he aims to bring down the master of Hell, for a moment in time, it had appeared that Jol was on his way to victory as Heeseung merely stood, bearing his teeth as he narrowed his gleaming eyes.

Inches away from colliding, Heeseung shoots a hand and catches Jol by his neck in mid flight.

'One chance.....that's all you get....and you just lost it.'

With his free hand, Heeseung extends his fingers. Bringing Jol down into a kneel, cowering his stance before him, everyone, to include the cult regulators and Forras, all watched as Heeseung's extended fingers shoots inside Jol's mouth. With a firm grasp, he takes his other hand, and commences the same movement, prying the archangel's mouth wide open.

The corners of his mouth rip, the tearing of skin exposes bright red flesh as Jol screeches out in agony and struggles to escape the Devil's grip. Once Heeseung had the archangel right here he wanted, he heaves in a deep breath.

His snout extends upwards as he opens his mouth. A loud and fearsome growl emerges as a ball of light could be seen deep within his oral cavity. Shifting his head to the side, he roars. HIs eyes glare down at the pitied angel before him, and with swift motion, Heeseung leans in and expels an exhale of ravaging flames from his mouth, and directly into Jol's.

Swaying his face faintly from left to right, he unleashes the fire's of Hell, coating Jol's innards entirely as the archangel's body begins to burn from the inside.

His skin burns with embers as the flames makes it's way outwards, his limbs and torso, burnt and melting from the lava induced flames, falls apart, drifting away in pieces within the wide open sea.

All you could hear were the panic screams of the crowds as they all ran outward, desperately trying to leave leave and reach outside city limits to escape the almighty demon that had just disintegrated the arch angel before their own eyes.

The cult regulators and Forras rage in panic as they all followed suit of the general public and began to fight each other for the sake of freedom, every man for himself.

Despite the frenzy they committed to in escaping, no one took notice as the seven brothers all merely stood, fully composed and lacked any displayed notion of offending the population.

While still kneeling and chained, you watched from afar as Heeseung's colossal form remains standing...fully composed and quiet. He shifts his head to gaze over his shoulder, right in your direction. His eyes look directly into your own, once locked on, they narrow down as he maintains eye contact. You froze at the sight of his demonic form sinking into your sight. Your breathing stopped at the ungodly sight of his mystical structure.

After a moment or two of shared visual contact, he breaks it by turning his head and releasing one last roar into the night sky, an almighty and fierce tone, you were convinced that every star in the sky shifted from its horrendous velocity.

With his fearsome cry, his body morphs back into the swarm of bats that fly outward and trail the sky towards the great unknown as they disappear off into the horizon.

One week before man was created by God.....

............

Breaching the alter, the three Muses arrive as beckoned.

"Master Elder, you have arrived." The voice of an elder woman gently greets the three visitors.

Bowing in respect, the Master Elder pays his tribute as acknowledges the greeting.

"Calliope, please forgive us for our delay. We came as swiftly as we could."

"Raise your head Master Elder, there is nothing to forgive." the woman, Calliope, a former muse who retired her duties long ago, in order to serve God fully, by aiding his quest to create people. Passing her will to the current Master Elder, Calliope taught the current leader of the group the specialty of expelling embodied knowledge, truth, and invention.

"Pray tell me, Calliope, why is it that we were summoned to the alter? I thought it was forbidden to breach near it." the Master Elder inquires as he gazes upon the magnificent height of the stone pillars surrounding the alter.

"Our Lord has bestowed a unique request. We are to travel through the advancement of time and bear witness to the birth."

"Birth?....the birth of whom?"

...........

"Of a mortal child."

.............................

"It's time.....y/n...."

Shifting your gaze over to the side, you saw Jungwon standing before you, back in the human form that you were familiar with.

Kneeling down beside you, he effortlessly does away with your restraints. Heeseung was nowhere in sight after his victory in defeating Jol, yet your heartbeat felt as if it was in a standstill.

"I will take you to him." Jungwon's voice remained calm and tranquil as ever.

Trembling, you began to sob faintly.

Lifting your head back up, he presents you his hand to help you stand.

"......will...will there be pain?" you asked nervously. For reasons unknown, you felt more frightened than you had when you were facing death at the hands of the angels. It didn't make sense, yet you couldn't ignore the contrasts in your emotions as you compared the moments together.

His eyes faintly drop to your chest, right where your heart was located, before they shift back up to meet yours directly. Without issuing a verbal response, he simply nods in a faint notion.

Your breath hitches. Facing the direction of where the swarm of bats flew to, you turn back to look at him. With glossy eyes and the tears breaching breakage from your ducts, you trembled out a small request.

"Is....is it too late to pray?....." you asked in a stuttered pitch.

With a soft expression on his face, he shakes his head.

"It's never too late to do that...." a faint smile graces his face as he gently moves a piece of your hair away from your face.

Seeing you display a saddened smile, you shift your posture as you struggled to contain your tears and remain composed.

"Would you like for me to pray with you?" he asks.

You nod in earnest as you chuck back the tears that breached their release.

Taking both your hands, he presses his forehead against yours. With your eyes closed, his calm and gentle voice admits a prayer for the sovereignty of the nation, the peace of the people, and mercy on your soul.

"Oh thee faithful Lord of thy soul....I beseech you to bestow your desired mercy onto your creation...."

Your heart beats slowly. Taking a deep breath, you steadily release it as you relish the feeling of Jungwon's skin touching yours.

"Hail to Sun and Moon, bless the people with the prosperity of love and tenderness, as you intended for them."

Taking in another deep breath, you felt the drop of a single tear trailing down your cheek.

"Have mercy on thy soul...have mercy on the sacrifice this child is destined to accept. Have mercy on her willingness to serve the people...the world.....the goodliest of creations that your holy spirit.....and the great Devil...Lucifer.....have gifted. In your name...."

Gulping down a breath deep into your throat, you braced yourself at the final word of his prayer.

".....Amen."

Opening your eyes, your vision was met with the vast openness of unfamiliar land...Jungwon was nowhere to be found.

Standing alone in a field of soft baby's breath, you gazed into the blackened horizon, where a full display of stars and planetary moons paint the night sky.

"Calliope....forgive me...but if what you're saying is....." the Master Elder's voice trails off as he looks with disbelief at his former mentor.

'She couldn't have possibly just said.....that's....what would happen if.....'

With a faint smile of reassurance, Calliope nods.

"Cal, I do not question the Lord's will....however, this seems unethical. Lucifer wants nothing more than to destroy our master....he yearns to darken his light and forever break his spirit....how...how can we possibly stand by and let this happen? Lucifer will only kill the mortal child off and will still yearn for more bloodshed...he has vowed to kill off humanity and wages a grudging war against God with ever intent in causing his demise...I dont see how....how...."

"You need not worry about that now Master Elder....come with me, bring your disciples. I will show you his ultimate will...." Calliope softly issues as she extends a hand to the Master Elder.

Breaching the alter, the submit prayer as the orb of light captures their forms and transfer their bodies through time, nearly seven thousand years into the future.

"Master Elder....open your eyes, we are here." Calliope gently coaxes the elder as his eyes remained winced shut.

"Where are we exactly?"

"We have arrived in what was once the Ancient lands of Euterpe, it has since inherited a different name, and has been expanded by its inhabitants....'people'."

Studying their surroundings, the Master Elder and his disciples witness at first hand in the future, what people are.

"They look similar to us.....yet they are mortal?"

Calliope nods. "Come with me."

Leading the three muses afar to an old abandon building. Making way up the steel ladder wells, the small group fix themselves on the rooftop, overlooking the vast majority of manmade features and the nearby sea. The night sky coats over the city with a cozy shadow of sleeping comfort as it lays to rest.

"How strange...they look so much like us and yet...they require special necessities in order to thrive." The Master Elder notes.

"They do...and yet they are far greater than any of us...." Calliope issues back as she takes out from the hidden pockets of her robe, a small vial and a locket.

"Is that....?" the Master Elder gasps.

"It is...."

Hearing her response, the Master Elder winces his eyes shut in bewilderment as he absorbs the gravity of what was about to transpire.

'.....my God.......'

With closed eyes, Calliope submits a small smile as she regains her sight and turns to look at the Master Elder and the two younger muses.

"Its time...."

"Calliope.....is he sure about this? We are talking about creating a mortal for the mere purpose of......"

He pauses as his breath loses momentum, '.........sacrificing to the Devil...."

With a faint nod, Calliope displays an expression of trust and fidelity.

"We must trust in his will.....do you accept and will you bear witness to the birth?" She asks, presenting an ultimatum towards her peer.

Hesitant, the Master Elder succumbs to the trust of his master, and nods.

"Very well.....then we are ready...." Calliope softly speaks as she gazes up at the dark sky, taking aim at every star as they glisten.

"The Holy Grail 'neath ancient Roslin waits.....

The blade and chalice guarding o'er Her gates.

Adorned by masters' loving art, She lies,

She rests at last beneath the starry skies." - Robert Langdon, The Da Vinci Code.

'".....Half my heart....half my light...my spirit...my flesh and my colors to make you whole....let the pieces of thy essence create something extraordinary....oh child of mine....made out of thy own soul.....become something unruly.....save thy people....save thy soul eternally....'

Descending from the Heavens above, a single orb of light streams downward, making its way before the faithful servants of his authority.

It gracefully takes its station. Centered between the four figures, a tender voice is faintly heard emerging from its body, nearly a whisper....it was both mature and childlike, coming in incoherent and unreadable. Staring in awe at the sight before them, their hearts flutter as they witness something....incredible.

"Calliope......is.....is that?....."

"It is......."

"Take the mold of my holy divinity.....become my mortal descendent."

As their eyes adjust the illuminating orb, they witness in near disbelief.

"Behold....the flesh, the holy light, the essence of our master himself.....just a piece, yet ever as divine as the rest of him." Calliope calmly issues as she gracefully smiles.

'This........this is God's own flesh.......the first to have ever been exposed....or shared....'

Removing the cork from the vial, and opening the small locket, Calliope finalizes the process of creativity as she takes the dark strands that remained threaded together, and gently submerges it inside the light, along with the contents of the vial.

".....thats...."

"Yes....when the first archangel was born, we saved the remaining essence that of which he was created from....a small thatch of his hair for safekeeping for our beloved master...who loved his favorite entirely too much. With his own essence, it does not taint our master's light, instead, it becomes one with it. Thus.....it is everything that Lucifer yearns for....it is a part of him....everything that he is.....yet it is also everything he lacks....everything he desires.

Incorporating the souvenired mememtos, the hue of the light's tint changes. The innocent voice remains faint, yet develops a playful nature as it levitates once more.

Witnessing the divinity of his holy form, even if it was just a small piece of him, the muses gasp out in great respect. Tears emerge from their eyes at the glory of their master.

Gripping on to their chests, bewildered by the miracle of witnessing God's flesh, they bow, issuing tears at it's magnificence. Calliope, joining in unison as she bows, whispers to the light before it takes travel.

"Mortal daughter of God....take heed...grow steady....grow strong....you have a task...and though it pains us so...you must commit to your duties to save the rest of his creation. Where each mortal is created in God's image....you....are the only one created out of his own entity. Mortal child of his divine holiness.....your flesh and essence will be key for humanity to thrive....but also.....to teach him forgiveness....to teach him.....love. Bear us, and your father no ill will.....for even though the one who you are gifted to, holds a tainted heart....rest assured, I see it with thy own eyes.....you shall forever be loved and protected."

At the final issue of his decree, the light expands into an exploding force, issuing a massive traveling current that flared throughout the city, disappearing in an instant.

"Master Elder..."

"Yes, Calliope."

"There is one more task....he beckons you and your disciples to commit."

"Pray tell me, for I am his humble servant and will be at his bidding."

"You are to go to Hell.....bring your disciples.....and take Lucifer to the alter. Take him to the destined period of time when the mortal child is at their prime. You are to present our master's gift to him....do you think you can succeed?"

....................

"..........Yes........"

...............................................

"What do you want to name her?"

Rocking the delicate newborn against her bosom, a young mother softly sings to her baby....a daughter.

"Honey, lets name her....y/n. I've always liked that name."

"Y/n?.....how perfect.....I love it."

'.........y/n'

-End song here-

Gazing off into the horizon of the starry sky, your white skirt blows delicately against the gentle current of the wind that guides your hair over your shoulder. The skin of your breasts remain exposed, your lips stained red, and your skin glows under the moonlight. The perfect image of all things ethereal.

.............................

'.......There you are....'

With gentle steps, he walks in your direction. Adorning his black attire, with the lace mask hovering over his eyes, he breathes deeply at the sight of the floral spread that surrounds you.

'...How beautiful.......so pretty.....'

Breaching nearer, you hear the delicate crush of the flowers under the soles of his steps.

Shifting your gaze over your shoulder, you watch as he closes in....standing right in front of you.

Noticing the glistening shine in your eyes, he softly smiles. "Why are you crying?"

Faintly shaking your head, you couldn't develop a response....you didn't know what to say, how to feel, or what to think.

"Shhh.....you don't have to cry...." leaning in, he gently embraces your body against his chest. Gently removing the Azalea crown that adorned your head, he tosses it and nuzzles his face into the strands of your hair....taking in a deep inhale as he softly moans....savoring the moment.

'Finally......I've waited for so long.....'

You tremble at the feeling of his embrace trapping you in.

"Scared?...." he asks.

You didn't issue a response.....instead, you remained with your head low as your forehead is softly pressed against his chest.

"Come here..." he whispers. Raising both your hands, he guides them towards the back of his head, your fingers delicately grazing against the black strands as he intertwines them with the loose ends of the lace fabric that is tied over his face.

"You can take it off....it's okay." he gently whispers. Leaning in, he kisses you passionately, as his hands roam you entire body, ruffling the chiffon fabric of your skirt in the process.

"You....don't know how......dreadful the wait was......" He softly speaks in between each kiss as his tongue coats the inside of your mouth. Your hands remained gently gripping on the ties of his mask. For some reason, you found it hard to pull them apart.

Reaching back up to take hold of your hands, he guides them as he gently, in unison with your own, pulls the fabric in opposite direction, causing it to come undone.

You stared as his face remained calmly aloof....his eyes shut.

Gently opening them, he displays a handsome face...it was devilishly handsome....and much more enticing than any of his brothers. His profile resembled that of the Greek God Apollo, yet his strong and lithe frame was much more lethal and appealing than any sculpture you've witnessed in your life.

Softly smiling at you, his eyes slightly widen as he takes your hands, raising them to his lips, he kisses them with the most tender pecks.

"Seven thousand years....is too long....even for an immortal.....did they tell you I slept for majority of it?"

".....yes....they did....." you assumed he was referring to his brothers as he continued to speak, expressing his agony over the lengthy period of waiting.

"I couldn't stand being awake....I needed to dream...I needed to see you.....you have no idea just how much I've wanted this....this moment....to touch you like this....to kiss you....to hold you.....it's all I ever wanted...." lowering your hands, he regains his grip around your waist once more and pulls you into him as he kisses you deeply.

His moans were stealthy with added depth as he expels the tone into your mouth, you felt the vibration of his groans as he shifts his face to merge deeper into the kiss.

Gently breaking it, his eyes shift down at the ground.

The moment you saw a smirk forming on his lips, you shy'd your face away. You felt entirely too nervous and scared, yet you didn't know why.........until.

'......did....did he just chuckle?.....why did it sound so...'

Raising your head, your eyes widened and your mouth released a shuttered gasp. Wanting to scream, you found yourself frozen with fear as your body couldn't comprehend the view....

........................

"I"m sorry......am I scaring you?.......believe me I'm not trying to....I'm just so happy.....I finally have you...you're finally mine."

..........

Perhaps it was the pitch black sky......it's dark aura stained the environment....creating an eerie atmosphere.

..........

Perhaps it was the glare of the moon above....creating shadows that dispelled a sense of unearthly lore.

..........

or........

Perhaps it was none of those things....perhaps it had nothing to do with the lack of lighting.....or the darkness that surrounds you.....instead....

Maybe...just maybe it was....the way he stared at you....the way he looked hungry.....no...famished.......the way his insidious expression greeted you with a dangerous desire......the way his hands gripped you tightly.....the way he raised his brows and gazed at you with a twisted and sinister love in his eyes.....the way his lips became blood red upon receiving his bite.....out of excitement......

or.........

Perhaps......it was his..........smile.

‘Please God….someone…..anyone……why is he looking at me like that…..what is he going to do to me?'

…………….

Authors note:

Part 2 coming tomorrow! So more to come.....again...i'm so sorry about that picture.....yikes.

Taglist: @deobitifull; @solstramaii; @vampiregirl215; @nshmrarki; @enhypen14; @iamliacamila; @lisaaannna; @nikstrange; @jaehaki; @luv-enhy-skz33; @silcry@honeysjae; @crackedcameraa; @stinkmonkey ; @baekxo07@raishaii @@yangjungwon33@lhspeachie ; @differentchildwombat ; @prettykia ; @kimsseonu ; @stvrryhee ; @en-thralled ; @hoonzdzbl ; @yuppppp ; @jinniespuppy ; @browsehnnie ; @they2luv1naia ; @aetherl0l ; @stvrryhee @yohanabanana @graythecoffeebean @beanglespewpew @jwnghyuns @gogorkkeeieosos @clairecottenheart

[freshlyrage]

Running Like Water

Chapter 16

pairing: Javier Peña x OFC (written as xReader)

fic warnings: NSFW Explicit Smut (18+ MDNI) language, strained family relationships, mentions of drug abuse, discussions of insecurities and body image issues, daddy and mommy issues

fic tags: Best friends younger sister, Life-long crush, Friends to lovers, Unrequited love, slow burn, Push and Pull, Small Town Dynamics, Secret Relationships, latina MC, Fluff and Angst, OFC!Jessica Alba face claim, sorry Lorraine I'm bringing you into this, Time jumps, 2 year age gap, pre-canon

word count: 4.8k

a/n: OMG babes I'm sorry about the wait. I moved back onto campus and wheww they are working my little english major butt. Heres this little update, dont jump me. Hopefully you can forgive me because we're getting like 3 chapters of New Orleans content so... any way enjoy

His body still limp over yours; you feel a rush of nerves run up your spine. Burying your face into the space between his shoulder and neck. Perfectly fit. “Javi!” You whisper. His own chuckles dying at the slow realization of how fucked they are. He’s silent for a bit as you two breath slowly in sync. Shutting your eyes tightly half hoping this part of the night is a nightmare. 

“Fuck…” He groans before flopping on his back next to you. The image is dirty too, still in pants but his half hard length exposed sweaty–and you, bare from the waist down. 

The circling thoughts of all the ways this could ruin you runs its course in the silence before you begin to panic. Sitting up in bed quickly, grabbing your pillow to conceal him. Javier sighs as if he doesn't have a care in the world. What are we going to do? What are we going to do? “What are we going to do?” You whisper, bringing your knees to your chest. Your eyes nearly blur as you are still coming down from your orgasm. 

He’s silent, panting still. You could hear your mom in the living room scattering things around. Your chest heaves with each noise she makes, Javier brings his palm flat on your knee, thumb stroking its side. “We’ll come up with something, I’ll leave once we know she’s asleep.”

“She’s going to catch on when I have to explain to her in a few days that I’m catching a ride with you to Louisiana.” You whisper yell, that thought already cripled you since your bath. How in the world were you going to do this? You were so high off of being bathed and fucked by Javi that you hadn’t thought of how to execute this mini vacation and now? He stirs in his bliss, the perfectly placed pillow concealing him falls to the floor.  You look at his waist, groaning, you reach to grab him, he responds in a stomach pitting hiss. You narrow your eyes at him and tuck him back into his boxers. 

 Why is he so calm? How is this not the biggest deal to him? He smirks watching your mind race.

“Something funny?” You snap in the quietest tone possible. And he keeps on that sly little side smile, the mustache doesn’t help the sexiness of it, you’d kiss him in his stupid face if you weren’t panicking inside. He shakes his head, making no effort to sit up and level with you. He just watches your worry. “What.”

“You’re so pretty.”

Your eyes widen, the tips of your ears red hot. You bring your brows in a small pull and a frown, feeling so shy under his gaze. Eyes closed for a moment, he sits up and kisses the line of worry between your brows. His hands holding your cheek. “Javi.” You groan.

He ignores you and kisses your temple, “You’ll tell Melissa I parked the car here,” he kisses your cheekbone next. “And walked to the bar, in case I needed someone sober to drive me home.” His hand moves down to your neck and just above the plane of bone exposed in your tank top. And finally gripping your breast, lips on your ear, “The bar is only a 4 minute walk from here, it was the smartest idea for me. I did it once in high school, remember?” 

Your mouth parts and his thumb grazes over your sensitive nipple. Your brows screw tighter and surprisingly, “No-no I don’t remember.” The idea of him holding onto a memory just like you fills your chest with something unfamiliar. Nails grazing his shoulders, “You’re so touchy.”

He mumbles a complaint before pressing his lips to the side of your face again, “After homecoming, do you remember?”

October 21st 1979

Lorraine hated the color blue on him anyway. 

When Javier profusely apologized to his girl about homecoming dance or lack thereof, she had sighed and turned her head out the car window. She wasn’t able to accept the idea, the thought of her exclusive partner choosing to keep the company of his best friend's sister instead of showing up to a dance they were made to go together. 

It was a big deal for Lorraine. She had just lost her virginity to Javi and he had called her his girlfriend to his dad just a week before. Homecoming was meant to be them showing themselves to the world. Javier on the other hand couldn’t care for the approval or acknowledgment of others. If people asked, he’d tell them.

 So he apologizes with a hand on her knee. There is no right way to tell her, to explain to her why Javier picked you over her that night. He couldn't tell her that the thought of you being upset makes him sick in some twisted overprotective way. He can't say those things, not to someone who liked him so much. He can't say that to her because he also liked her just as much. 

“I forgive you.” She sniffles, her tear stained nose pointed towards the door. Her blue manicure scraping his knuckles. The color matching the tie he had planned to wear, his chest tightened. 

He hadn’t regretted the night. Telling you the truth, being there for you after being humiliated. He’s known you since you were young, he had developed that need to be in your corner at all times. No one ever was. But, he should’ve called Lorraine, he should’ve told her. She’s understanding, kind, she would have offered to come over and help the situation because that’s just who she was. 

Javier hadn’t called, and shoved deep down in a space too uncomfortable to reach he made the decision not to rather than forgetting. The shameful hope that maybe the fast moving relationship would crash and that fleeting thought made him feel awful. That was the first time he had looked at you, in your pretty dress and felt more scared than he’s ever felt in his entire life. 

His voice dying in his throat the second he saw the way you learned to cry. Quietly, wiping your face with the back of your palm, trying to hide any evidence of discomfort. 

Lorraine cried differently, head turned away but she lets herself go. She doesn’t apologize like you do, she cries and doesn’t wipe away the evidence. 

“You forgive me?” Disbelief and shameful disappointment lacing his voice crack.

It’s silent again but she nods. “You’re not allowed to go to the bar for the rest of the year.”

Javier chuckled, his thumb brushing her knuckle. She faces him now, cheeks still wet. Her blonde hair pulled in a low pony, she was just so classically beautiful. Javier felt silly in her presence, there was no way people thought he was up to her standard. “I’m seventeen.”

She scoffs, “I know you go to the bar on fridays, they let you in. Josie saw your truck there last weekend”

She was right. “How’d she know it was me, it could've been my dad.” He teases, internally wincing knowing this isn’t the time. He had been sort of caught. After being away at the youth academy he had frequented the bars, the small habit urged on when he came home. Despite the owner very well knowing who Javi was and his age, they still let him in. So he’d grab a drink or two and drive home. It was a part of his new routine here, maybe he was escaping something, maybe he hoped his mom would walk through the bar doors. It was no coincidence he only sat in at The Tap, the bar his mother frequented in the late years before she left him.

“I know your dad doesn't drink, I’m not joking. It isn't safe to drive like that.” She brushes her hair out of her face, frowning at him so slightly. Javier nods in agreement. 

“Is it that you don't want me to go or you don't want me to drive there?” 

He was being a hardass he knows, he must have gotten it from his mom because Chucho would never talk back to his woman. He knows the answer, he knows that the question will rile up Lorraine. And still somewhere far in his chest is the desire to argue so much that he can find a way out of this. 

Lorraine’s cheeks flush red like it does when she’s angry, she looks out the window for a moment like she’s wondering if what she’s about to say next is appropriate.

“It isn't healthy. You need to deal with the loss of your mother in better ways.”

Javier’s chest caved in on itself, the tips of his own ears getting hot. His gaze quickly averted from every part of Lorraine's face to see if she was serious, if he had heard her correctly. No one knew the details about Flaca, not even Frankie, not you. All you and your brother know is that she had left when Javier was little, she wasn't around when you met him and he never seemed bothered. It always seemed like a nonissue. “My mother isn't dead.” Javi snaps, impulsively reaching for his car keys. He needed to drop Lorraine off before this conversation goes any further. 

“I know-” Her hand is quicker as she grabs the keys before him. “Your father told me she used to go to that bar, he pointed it out when we had dinner last week.”

“Give me the keys, you're going home.”

Lorraine flares her nostrils and moves the key further, “No Javi. Talk to me, I don't know anything about your childhood, about your mom, about what you do when we’re not together. I know you have abandonment issues I understand-”

Javier cuts her off, “Jesus christ.” Something strange thrums in his chest, an urge– an urge to cry. An urge he hasnt felt in years, this is fucked. 

“Don't scoff like I’m crazy, it's why you do all this shit! It's why you left me stranded on homecoming, you're trying to avoid this commitment. Avoid us, this. ”

There it is. 

“Jesus- I literally told you I had to help Andrea out stop changing the topic–why the fuck would you bring my mother into-”

“No lets talk about it, your weird fucking obsession with that girl. Acting like she’s completely off limits, freaking out because I introduced myself to her. You told me you two were not even close! You said you stopped being friends when you went away last year, go figure.” She laughs dryly.  Javier’s blood runs dry, facing forward and shutting his mouth. “Abandoning your life for a year because of what? The academy? Give me a break.” They had bickered but nothing like this, he hadn't seen this side of Lorraine. Using something as personal as his mother to feed into something as stupid as homecoming. “She was rude to me at the game and you let it slide, if you’re in love with that girl just fucking spare me. I have no interest in competing against a girl like that.” 

Like that. 

He takes a breath before continuing. He needed to be rational.He feared any reaction would reveal some truth in her fear. In love with her, it made the strangest knot in his stomach. He had barely interacted with you in the past year. There was no way. Sure he cares for you, a lot, maybe too much. Maybe you consume more of his thoughts than he’d like to admit. Maybe when the two of you were younger he thought you were the sweetest thing to walk this earth but the 2 year gap felt larger than life then. Maybe he’s just confused seeing you older, mature, prettier and maybe he can't stand seeing you be with anyone else. Maybe he misses being around you right now. Just maybe, maybe when Lorraine brought up his mother he felt a sense of dread, she knows something you don't and why does that feel so wrong? 

“It isn't like that, just–just please give me the keys Lorraine.” 

Without a word she complies and Javier takes her home without a goodbye. 

He drives aimlessly for another hour, around town. He passes where he met you by the bikes all those years ago. He remembers those stupid overalls you wore religiously. He passes your moms boutique, the soft lighting of the shop reflecting on the puddle outside the stoop. And he passes the bar his girlfriend had just banished him from, he's urged to enter it more than ever. Spend a few dead presidents on something to distract him from the unsettling feeling of… he wasn't sure. 

And fuck it, he drives straight to your house. He wasn't sure when his brain started registering it as your house and not his best friend Frankie’s house but he makes the left and heads up the small hill where your home sat perched in all its glory. An empty driveway and a soft glow coming from the curtains. He remembers waiting outside your door waiting for you to enter safely on hot summer nights. 

He parks, eyes skating at the cash in his cup holder, he could leave his truck here and walk to the bar from here. Just in case of course, in case someone catches his truck. His mouth dries when his eye catches the bracelet that belongs to his girlfriend, the word sounding wrong in his own head. He needs a drink. 

Javier’s boots crunch on the–no, your driveway was paved, your mother thought dirt driveways were a messy disgrace. He had been so used to having to lay his shoes on the porch in order to be allowed into his own home. 

He knocks, it’ll probably be Frankie answering the door if he isn't somewhere bothering his girlfriend. But after only a few seconds he hears you giggling behind the door and Javier finds himself forming a smile before you even reach the knob. The door swings open and-

“Jesus christ what's on your face?” He blurts a bit too loud, your eyes widen and somehow through the mess on your face you turn beat red. Your hand is flying to cover your face.

 On your face are red spots at the apple of your cheeks, brows glued down with a thin pencil line mimicking an eyebrow, lips red lined dark and those fake eyelashes Diana Ross wears. 

The back of your palm is covered in lines of makeup, browns, blues and yellows. And to top it all off you're in a large shirt and slippers. “Javi–what are you doing here? Oh my god” You shriek, looking over your shoulder still hiding your face.

Javier can't help but feel a warmth spread through his chest at the sight while something else in him scolds himself for reacting so rudely. “Sorry I was wondering if I could leave my car here for a bit–what-you don't have to keep covering your face I already saw it.” Javier steps up onto the highest ledge and peers over your shoulder, your new friend Liandra coming up behind. 

“Javi! What a nice surprise, I was practicing my stage makeup for Cabaret on Drea, come in!” She urges, and Andrea swiftly drops her hand shooting a glance at her friend with makeup brushes in her hand. Feeling out of place and rather creepy imposing on your sleepover he shakes his head gives you a glance you can only read as, let's talk alone. 

You catch on dismissing yourself for a moment and closing the front door behind you, the light cutting away into the darkness of the night surrounding the two of you. It was a bit chilly for you to be out here, he promised himself he won't keep you long. The two of you haven't spoken since he kept you company last weekend while you detailed your tiny anxieties and insecurities, how you held so much in that tiny body of yours is beyond him. He felt that weird stupid primal instinct of protectiveness when thinking of you being so torn down by the jokes of pathetic men. He hasn't spoken to you in school the following week, attempting to keep you far away from Lorraine. That would have just added salt to the open wound, he wanted a do over. Maybe when they were better together he could properly introduce the two, put out whatever fire Lorraine believes to be between the two of them. 

But you looked exceptionally beautiful in this light, even with your face painted. And a thought like that isn’t okay. Not when your brother could be in the house or heading home. 

Your lips quirk into a small grin, he had been staring this whole time forgetting to speak. “Sorry for this,” You wave a hand over your face, “I was doing Liandra a favor. Didn’t mean for my face to scare you much.”

Javier’s stupid heart skips a beat, “You didn't scare me.”

You shake your head and bite the inside of your lip, who are you, Javi thinks, when did I start to feel like this?

 “Sure, just next time when you bump into me bare faced dont scream, it might hurt my feelings.”

Javi finds no humor in your self depreciation, not after last saturday. Haven't you known? You were so pretty it hurt him bone deep. He’d tell you over and over if it was appropriate but instead he dissents. Looking behind him at the hill that leads to town, to the bar, it was getting dark. 

“Is your brother home? Mom?”

You cross your arms in suspicion, “My mom is staying late doing inventory at the store and Frankie is staying at Genies, doing… whatever they do.” You grimace for a split second thinking of your brother and his second year of the honeymoon phase with his girlfriend. “You need to leave your car here, why is everything okay?”

A small line of worry folds between your brows and like always it causes his stomach to flip. What's gotten into him? 

“Everythings fine, I just planned to get a few drinks at the bar and didn't want to bring my dads truck in the line of sight of all the nosy people in town.”

You get that judgy look in your eye you gave him whenever you’d watch him smoke weed in the basement, “You’re 17, why don't you just go out and drink with your friends.”

“Got an issue with me going to the bar?”

“No.” You did, at the time your stomach had been in knots at the thought of him doing something so adult, he never felt more out of reach than in that moment. “I don't, so what, you're gonna walk up here drunk and drive home. Not happening.”

Bossy, Javier’s eyes fall to the ground trying to hide the spark in his eyes. What the fuck is happening, he’s blushing like a schoolboy at fucking Andrea. “I was hoping If I was too wasted you could just call me a cab.”

“And if I’m not awake?” You stayed awake the whole time, worried about him. 

“I’ll throw a rock at your window, last resort. I rarely get drunk anyway, you can assess the situation.”

You're silent for a moment, your own done up eyes falling to your bunny slippers. You frown for a moment, conspiring all of the ways this could go wrong. Before sighing, “Sure. Be safe or whatever.” 

Javier watches you step away and enter the house again. His hand rising to his chest to try to subside the rapid beating behind it. Why is this happening to me? Wasn’t I angry 30 minutes ago? 

He hears you and your friend let out girlish laughs and for a moment he considers knocking again. Forget the whole thing, just spend time with you instead, it was probably healthier. It would have made him feel better for the moment. But he knew he couldn't do that, how would he explain that to Lorraine. 

Yeah after we argued about Andrea, I went directly to her house to make myself feel better, will you still have me Lorraine?

Surely not.

“No wonder I blocked that from my memory, I looked horrendous.” 

“You looked cute. Like a flapper from the 20s.” He whispers, since the beginning of the story it seemed your mother had gotten in bed. The two of you stayed quiet anyway, holding onto each other under the covers. Your cheeks crimson at him describing the memory in detail. You hadn't known Lorraine had such a bad taste of you from the start, when you had been introduced to her as his girlfriend just a month later she had been so kind, like she had been on homecoming night. 

And to bring up his mother in the petty argument…you wished you knew how to react. 

You simply knew close to nothing about his mom, to you he made it seem so insignificant. You wished you had known he left to the bar to feed into his unhealthy habit of hoping maybe she’d walk in, if you had known you would have forced Liandra to do that stage makeup on his face. Keep him away from that cycle of grief. 

“Do you remember how you showed up later?” You ask, his retelling brought every detail of that night back to the forefront of your brain. The sweetness of each interaction when he stumbled tipsy to your front door a few hours later ringing in your ears. 

Javier shuts his eyes, “I don't actually, I got a bit drunk huh?”

You giggle, “Yeah… you did.” You just couldn't believe you had forgotten about it, it wasn't like you. 

Javier drops his head in the crook of your neck in boyish embarrassment, “Jesus christ.”

It was 11pm, you were starting to worry that your mother would come home early and unload questions about the situation. Liandra was long gone and so was your painted face. Just you and a bouncing knee as you tried to occupy yourself with a rerun of Different Strokes season 1. Your hair was in its slightly overgrown phase of the layers Genie cut for you in August, pulled in a high ponytail. Face paint still in small dusty crusts on the front strands of your hair, you'd consider another shower if you weren't waiting for a knock. 

“You showed up so late, I was afraid my mom would catch us and tell Frankie.” You tell Javi as you stare at the vanity you used to get ready on every morning before school. 

Javi sighed, sounds familiar. 

Javier knocked half past 11, you sprung to your feet and opened the door. You almost want to laugh thinking of how Javier looked with no mustache, baby faced and glossy eyed. You stare at the grown men next to you and your heart swells at the thought of knowing him for so long. 

I’m drunk, he states the second you open the door. Your brows shooting high, Should I call you a cab? You ask, closing the door behind you. Your eyes switch to his fathers truck and back to him. Javier pulls his lips together in a drunk disagreeing pout.

Would you let me sleep here?

Your heart leaps in your chest, how you wished you could have let him. You were only fifteen then and you protected that small fantasy of being with him, forever, taking care of someone. You wished to just let him in and put him to bed, take care of the boy you had such a crush on. 

It's a funny thing, just 6 months later it was him taking care of your drunken body.

 “I wanted to let you stay.” You tell Javi now, your gaze caught on his side profile under the lowlights of your room. His jaw tightens and the urge to move closer, to kiss him goes bone deep. “I didn't know about your mom, I should have let you stay.”

Javier shakes his head in disapproval and turns to face you. “You did the right thing, you called me a cab right?” He tries to work through his memories, catalog and figure out what happened after he came drunk. He remembers being at the bar, someone asking if he was the son of Flaca and when he lied the patron went on and on about how messy she would get when she stopped by after her shift at the hospital. Javier remembers feeling protective over a mother who had never cared for him in the first place. 

“I offered to drive you.”

I can drive you home. He looked like he sobered up in that moment, the thought of you behind the wheel unsettling beyond anything else. 

Absolutely not

You remember scoffing, I dont have my license yet, but I can drive!

Javier had shook his head aggressively, Not happening, it's unsafe. 

You clamped your mouth shut before forcing him to stay put on your front door step as you head in to call him a cab. You had joined him on the steps again.

How’s high school treating you, he slurs slightly. He was already quite the big teen, broad and tall, his drunk wasn't the same as Frankie’s. Javier’s drunkenness was a small blush on his cheeks and a toothy grin. The opposite of how he presented in school when he walked around with that unapproachable frown and crinkle in his brow. 

Always looking like he was on the brink of either fucking you up or fucking you. 

It’s okay, I wish you would talk to me more, you wanted to say. It's weird to hang out with people that actually chose to be my friend. 

Javier’s drunken glance loaded with discontent cuts into you but he doesnt egg it on. His eyes gaze back down at the solid ground below them. You watched his gaze soften as he lost himself into his own thoughts. You remember looking at his face and feeling lonelier than ever. What lovely feelings at fifteen. 

“You weren't yourself that night, you didn't even argue with me. It felt lonely sitting with you when you weren't yourself.” 

Javier, the one that's yours, frowns and nods. “I was drunk but I remember hoping you would have touched me, at the time I think I needed some sort of comfort.”

In whispers you apologize to him now and he wants none of that, shaking his head. He grabs your hand and kisses the jagged bones of the back of your hand. Being a teenager sucked. Freshman year sucked. “The cab came quickly, what happened when you went home?” 

Javier stares off for a moment and quickly his thick brows furrow. “Lorraine was in my living room when I came home. We made up and she promised me she’d start over with you.” 

Ah, you thought. It made sense, that entire month of watching them slowly get close again until they finally made it official. That month when he ignored you and you watched him trail the halls, blushing behind him wondering if maybe you two just grew apart or if he realized he didn't need to be your friend anymore. Of course until that day in December when Javier found you with your textbooks in hand and a blotchy face. The day Lorraine introduced herself as if none of this happened. 

“Right.” You mumble, pulling up the covers closer to your chest. Nostalgia flooding and crushing you right in bed with Javier, your thoughts spasming and jumping to all the things you promised to get over. And you turn your back against him, smushing your cheek into the pillow. Too confused to cry and Javier wastes no time in pressing his lips on the round of your shoulder. 

“It’s always been you Andrea, you know that.”

Your chin quivers and through it all you smile. With his face pressed against your shoulder you bring your left hand across your body to rough up his hair. “Whatever softie.” He groans, giving your shoulder a nice bite. “I’ll tell my mom it was a bar thing, but I’ll have to lie about Louisiana.”

“Mmm, what are you going to say?” He’s dozing off, you hear his voice getting rougher and smoother. 

You think of your mother for a second. You think of all the times she’s belittled you, made a decision for you, and apologized with a gift. You think of her saying that you have overstayed your welcome here, in the home you were raised. And fuck that, fuck her. 

“I’m just going to leave, she doesn't care enough.” 

Javi stills in his kisses, “And your brother.” 

You roll your eyes, forgetting about that pest.

 “We can figure it out in Louisiana.”

[forestshadow-wolf]

This is Not CoD related, but infact having to do with the HTTYD live action that's coming out.

More specifically one problem that I'm seeing almost IMMEDIATELY and I hate it so I'm going to talk about it

Ok Before I actually get into it I want to preface with this: Not everyone is going to agree with me, some people might even think I'm incredibly wrong. And that's okay because this is my opinion and you have yours, and I, infact, am not saying that you have to take my opinion as fact

Anyway! SO the HTTYD live action has started filming. There's been talk about it for years, I'll be honest, I never really thought it would happen. Especially not this soon after the third movie.

Whether I'm excited for this film or not is yet to be seen. On one hand I definitely don't believe anything could top the original. And live actions are not always the best remake, especially for animated movies like this one. But on the other hand they DO have Dean Deblois back, and they've kept the original actor for Stoick, so at least we'll recognize one voice. Also I have high hopes for the soundtrack, since John Powell will be back. But again I'm still skeptical about the movie.

What I really wanted to talk about is, I just saw a tiktok talking about the movie (TT user: Straw Hat Goofy), I don't really have much to say about the video itself, it was good informationally. But I wanted to talk about the comments.

So as was stated in the video and confirmed officially, Actress: Nico Parker will be cast to play Astrid. Fine, dandy, lovely, I see no problem. Apparently not everyone thinks this way...

(Ignore my shitty editing to scribble out usernames and pfps)

Theres more. A lot more :(

Not the only reason I can see people actually complaining about the casting of Nico parker is (apparently) blatant racism.

Like I understand that the original movies Astid was a blue-eyed, blonde haired girl, but I don't think this slight change should be that big of a deal. If her acting is shit, historically, she wouldn't have been cast. And her appearance (especially something she CANNOT change about herself) WILL NOT make or break the movie.

Let me repeat that

NICO PARKER'S SKIN COLOR WILL NOT MAKE THE MOVIE SHITTY

Guys, this is the same thing that happened/is happening with the Percy Jackson series, people objected to Leah Jeffries being casted as Annabeth. But Leah is a phenomenal actor, and in my opinion, is the perfect actress for the role.

If you really have a problem with Astrid not looking like she did in the animated movies then DON'T WATCH the live action. Simple as that. Ignorance is bliss in this case, so be blissful. It's 2024 people are dying, people are living, and people still can't change the color of their skin (nor should they have to (or want to, especially if it's only to fit society) even if they could)

[crowzwrites]

Day 2 of mcspirk week - Trust

Ao3

Content warnings: Sex, I haven’t written smut before warning.

@mcspirkevents

Trying to show all aspects of their relationship.

—

it may seem like McCoy doesn't get along with Spock on the outside, as often they argue and trade insults. However, that is not the case. Leonard loves and cherishes the half-vulcan more. He'd trust Spock with his life if it came to it - Even if he's an idiot sometimes. His partners are often getting into trouble and being injured in the field. It scares the hell out of him. McCoy can always trust them to take care of him after a particularly bad mission that had resulted in severe injuries.

When McCoy and Spock were trapped on that alien planet outside of Federation space, he couldn't help but feel worried and fear that the vulcan would bleed out on the planet. Thank God he didn't, but McCoy would never forget seeing a different side of Spock, scared of dying and feeling an immeasurable amount of sadness over his lost planet. Something he would never understand. When his hands became coated in emerald green blood, he realised that Spock was more than a reluctant friend. When they returned to the enterprise and defeated the evil that threatened to eliminate them all, they became connected, such a profound bond that transcends his human understanding.

For that reason, plus many more, the trio decided to stay aboard the enterprise where they belonged. Not long after that decision, they all agreed that Spock may join their relationship. It didn't take any convincing at all, as Spock had been harbouring a crush on both of them.

McCoy felt like he finally found the missing puzzle piece in his life, Spock and him still argued but it became more light-hearted as they grew closer together.

Now they were in his quarters, more specifically sprawled out on his bed. Thankfully, it had been refitted so that all three of them could fit on it. Spock is sitting up and tapping away on his PADD whilst Jim is on top of him. They share a chaste kiss before Jim practically rips his shirt off.

"Eager as always, huh?" he rolls his eyes.

Jim doesn't answer. Just presses their lips together and undoes his belt, quickly freeing his erection. Instead of sucking him off as Jim most enjoys, the blonde grabs a bottle of sweet smelling lube and puts a small amount on his hands. McCoys is about to question what he's doing when he grabs his dick and pumps it hard, which makes him gasp.

Spock looks over at him and raises an eyebrow. He puts his device down, McCoy doesn't get to look at Spock anymore as Jim leans forward on his knees and kisses him and then smiles smugly when he gets another breathy moan after he squeezes his cock again, sliding his hands up and down his shaft almost painfully slow. Then he stops, which makes McCoy open his eyes (when did he close them?). Jim's pants had disappeared now.

Jim smiles at him. Now he's leaning over him and sucking on his shoulder. He sighs, almost wanting to yell at him to finish it already, but he stops when he sees those blue eyes staring at him lovingly. Trust Jim to get all emotional during sex, he rolls his eyes and huffs, giving him a look that says 'get on with it already'. That he did, going from a slow pace to fast in milliseconds and matching it on his own cock. McCoy fists the sheets and closes his eyes again. As always Jim hits all the right spots that he has come to perfect. He moans out Jim's name again before he comes on the blonde's stomach and Jim paints his in return then flops down beside him.

For a blissful moment all is silent as they both come down from their high. that is until Spock breaks it.

"Interesting." he says as if he's performing an experiment.

"Yeah." Jim laughs and gets up. Likely to get a towel for them both.

"Enjoy the show huh?"

"I will say it is… Fascinating." Spock blushes and looks away.

"Well I'm glad ya' enjoyed it, you're always welcome to join darlin'. "

Spock turns an even deeper shade of bronze but doesn't say no. Jim returns and cleans the both of them up, they put on some boxer briefs. McCoy gets up and pulls Spock into a tender kiss before they all snuggle into bed, he can feel Spock's curiosity as well as the deep trust that has formed between the three of them. Spock knows neither of them will force him into doing something he doesn't want, Jim and Leonard know it'll take time for them all to feel totally comfortable with each other as he and Jim are.

After all, relationships are built on trust.

[howlingday]

Can you do the King of the Hill Junichiro and Cotton reunion scene too please?

---------------------------------------------------

"Dad? Dad, can you put Zwei on the scroll?" Ruby asked as she waited for her father to honor her request. She was greeted with familiar panting. "Zwei!" She covered her mouth and whispered. "I can't talk long, but I'm in Mantle. It's so cold here, I bet you'd love it. We're meeting Weiss' half-sister and I wish you were here to meet her." Ruby sniffled. "I miss you so much. I love you!"

As she hung up, she heard her father groan in disgust. She never sobbed like this when she called him.

"Do you think this armor is too much?" Jaune asked as Ruby returned. "Or maybe I should wear more?"

"Look, kid," Qrow said, "love doesn't care what you look like, or if you're still a work in progress."

"Uncle Qrow, did you meet someone?" Yang teased. When she was met by a smiley nod, she chuckled. "Hey! Good for you! See if you can score some free stuff for us."

"Yang!" Ruby chided.

"Hush!" Weiss scolded, before turning her attention to the doors opening to reveal a bulbously large man with jowls like a bulldog, followed by a sickly woman helped inside by a girl who looked almost exactly like Weiss!

"Good evening, Kuche." Jacques greeted, kissing the woman's hand.

"Hello, Jacques." She replied sweetly, as though he hadn't abandoned her for nearly twenty years. "I'm glasd to see you're still boasting such a proud and virile mustache." With help from the girl, she seated herself next to him. How have you been?"

"Well, it has been a productive time in my life. Since returning to Willow, I have been getting back into Big Nicholas' good graces..."

As he boasted, the girl seated at the far end of the table, next to Weiss. The two silently nodded before the coal-haired maiden reached for the liquor and began drinking straight from the bottle. All the while glaring at the man on the far end.

"...and since then, I have balancing home and work, as CEO of the Schnee Dust Company and as a father to Winter, Weiss, and Whitley." He smiled. "And how have you been, Kuchi?"

"Thank you for asking." She replied with a shiver. "Since you left, I have been working as a service woman to support my daughter- excuse me, our daughter, Bliss." Jacques grinned at the girl, but was only replied with the same cold, red-eyed glare. She was halfway through her bottle. "Since then, I have been eating what I could since the sickness makes it difficult to do much, especially when everyone I thought I could trust abandoned me to raise our child. Then, I found a man who was willing to accept me as his wife, my dearest Koomers Peck." She gestured to the mountainous man already three bowls into his meal.

"I... I'm Weiss Schnee, second daughter to Jacques and Willow Schnee. I'm a huntress. And what work do you do?"

"I'm Bleiss Gelé, and I work three shifts as a housemaid to cover for my dying mother and her fatass scumbag of a husband." She took one final swig.

"I... see..."

"Oh, I'm sorry, Weiss." Bleiss slammed the empty bottle down. "Was my reaction to our disgusting shared sperm donor too harsh for your high class huntress world?" Her glare fixed on Jacques. "You finally feel guilty after nineteen years of high society and sucking on Big Dickless' tiny chode and think paying for one fancy dinner is enough to make me forgive you? To make me think of you as my father?! Fuck you! That walking human smegma is only a fucking inch more of a man than you ever will be! Even if it means I would never have been born, I wish my mother had never met you!"

"Well... You certainly have that Schnee fire in you." Jacques mused.

"Bliss, please!" Her mother pleaded.

"My name is Bleiss, and I refuse to be a Schnee!" She threw the empty bottle. "I HAVE NO FATHER!"

As the bottle shattered behind Jacques, the tension built to an unbearable weight for everyone, save Kummers, who continued to eat half of the table's servings.

"I... will see that this is cleaned up." Jacques stood and swiftly left the table.

"Um..." Weiss cleared her throat. "I'm... I'm sorry for what my father did to you, but-"

"Shut. The fuck. Up." Anger and fury were now cast on Weiss. "Listen to me, you flat-chested, no ass having, uppity femcel cunt. I. AM NOT. YOUR SISTER. If you were on fire, I wouldn't piss on you to put you out."

Weiss could only gulp at the harsh words.

[treason-and-plot]

I'm finally caught up! It took a few days of non-stop reading but I had to know what those 3 trainwreck idiots (Anita, Roy, Joël) ended up doing.

Anita and Roy are the biggest self sabotaging idiots I've seen in my life. Anita was an absolute trainwreck. I mean the girl had made all the wrong choices in life, one thing she did right is probably never giving up on her and Joël.

Roy is... he is just as bad at making decisions as Anita but I think their biggest difference is he just doesn't feel guilty or responsible, at all. I think the only time I've seen him actually feel sorry is when that whole pregnancy drug thing had happened.

And Joël, sweet idiot Joël. I don't have words for how stupid this man is. He just let's things happen to him. He let's women in his life manipulate him. I'm not a jealous person but him being such a clueless idiot about his exes' motives, is part of the reason why Anita lost it so many times (his idiocy and Anita's insecurity were bound to breed that problem.)

So far where they are at, I think Roy should've dumped Sonia looooong ago, like at the altar. The man had serious growing up to do before he got married and Sonia definitely wasn't it.

I'm just happy about Anita and Joël. For a while there I was really thinking that they were done but they made it. I'm still worried whenever I see Anita go out drinking because she still haven't fixed any of her problems but being with Joël seemed to have stabilise her. And Joël is in bliss with his daughter and son, even Saffron. I loved how much that little girl was upset when Joël was leaving.

It's a great story and I really advise anyone who had followed you to go back all those posts and read it all. I loved it!

Ps. After reading all of I've come to conclusion that Raj and Mia deserve each other, for sure. xD

I am dying at you christening Anita, Roy and Joël '3 trainwreck idiots!' That's made my year. And the fact that you spent days reading my story non-stop...my gratitude and awe knows no bounds. You are the best.

Poor Anita...dear, sweet, simple Harry was never going to make her happy. And she nearly destroyed her life and Joël's with her insecurities and her self-sabotaging behaviour, that's very true.

I don't think Joël is stupid...although I know many readers will disagree with me! He's a sensitive, intense, moody introvert who loves deeply and passionately and whose heart rules his head, often with disastrous results. But I wouldn't want him to be any other way!

You have hit the nail on the head re Roy...his personal mantra is never apologise, never explain. He never, ever second guesses himself. His sense of self is inviolate. He married Sonia because she presented a fascinating challenge to him and he did love her (and still does!) But yeah, theirs was a marriage destined to fail. I still miss them as a married couple though, as bizarre as that sounds. Their relationship was just so much fun to explore and write about!

One of the high points for me in my story's recent history has been the birth of Joël and Anita's daughter Alice...I still get emotional thinking about it! And thank you for mentioning Saffron's distress when Joël left Anita...that was another part of the story that I felt was particularly poignant for a variety of reasons (not least of which was Anita's selfishness) and has stayed with me for a long time.

As for Mia and Raj...well, we'll just have to wait and see! The two of them intrigue me as much today as they do as when I first started writing about them;)

Thank you again for taking the time to read my story and send me this...it's hard to express just how much it means to me. But one thing's for sure, it's people like you who make this community so wonderful and who make me inspired to keep on writing as long as I possibly can. And for that I will be forever grateful❤️

[blackhiil]

blackhill: song association (part 3)

you get me so high - the neighborhood

“wish i didn’t doubt it, wish i never ever told you all about it but i just had to let you know, i never meant to hurt you, though” one of them for whatever reason, begins doubting the relationship or doubting other and opens up about that doubt except now it’s cause a strain or damage to their relationship and now whoever told regrets it even if it needed to happen

needy - ariana grande

NATASHA Natasha natasha !!! "sorry if i'm up and down a lot, sorry that i think i'm not enough and sorry if i say sorry way too much" this just screams nat honestly. like maria is her first stable, relationship where her feelings are considered and her voice means something; so its intense and she's always scared something will go wrong.

505 - arctic monkeys

honestly, i don't have anything to say. it's just a song that screams THEM! like it's their song and it just makes sense.

stay - miley cyrus

angst. AnGsT. ANGST! "and I love you more than i did before and if today i don't see your face nothing's changed no one could take your place it gets harder every day say you love me more, than you did before and I'm sorry it's this way but i'm coming home, i'll be coming home and if you ask me i will stay, i will stay" so they've broken up for whatever reason because they thought it would best except they're miserable without each other. they've realized that being apart actually made them love each MORE and when they see each other again, they'll stay to make it work

the one that got away - katy perry

"in another life i would be your girl we keep all our promises be us against the world In another life i would make you stay so i don't have to say you were the one that got away" "i should've told you what you meant to me" high school lovers to enemies to lovers!!!! so, they dated when they were in high school and for reasons unknown, they don't last. fast forward, they're adults and yes, they're STILL hung up on each other but they were each other's great love, and now "in another life" they get a second chance to fix it

let her go - passenger

"staring at the ceiling in the dark same old empty feeling in your heart cause love comes slow, and it goes so fast well, you see her when you fall asleep but never to touch and never to keep cause you loved her too much, and you dived too deep" this is after nat is dead, maria is deeply depressed (naturally) and she always dreams about her but when she wakes up, she's alone with no natasha and it just hurts

give your heart a break - demi lovato

this can actually be told from either of their pov's. both of them have just been through too goddamn much romantically. "don't wanna break your heart wanna give your heart a break i know your scared it's wrong like you might make a mistake there's just one life to live and there's no time to wait to waste so let me give your heart a break" nat would definitely be worried about making mistakes "cause you been hurt before i can see it in your eyes you try to smile it away some things you can't disguise don't wanna break your heart baby i can ease the ache" maria would be worried about nat hurting her like she's been hurt in the past

drive - halsey

you know, they could be dying and still wouldn't admit their feelings for each other. this song is just them PINING after one another, it's RIDICULOUS. "your laugh, echoes down the hallway carves into my hollow chest, spreads over the emptiness it's bliss It's so simple but we can't stay over analyze again, would it really kill you if we kissed" they want each other so BAD! they spend so much time together that it's almost domestic at this point but of course they still won't admit their feelings "all we do is drive all we do is think about the feelings that we hide all we do is sit in silence waiting for a sign sick and full of pride all we do is drive" in conclusion, they want (and need) to kiss !

[genderfluidgothwitch]

Bwuehehe. Writer questions 1, 15, 28, 32, and 46

1: What font do you write in? Do you actually care or is that just the default setting"

I use either Calibri or Ariel, depending. Basically any sans-serif font thats ADHD/Dyslexia friendly. Love reading/writing, hate when words don't stay put lol

15: Do you write in the margins of your books? Dog-ear your pages? Read in the bath? Why or why not? Do you judge people who do these things? Can we still be friends?

Good lord lmao.

I just recently started being okay with annotating anf highlighting books. I used to consider it sacrilegious to do so, and then I realized who the fuck cares? They're my books, and fuck it, if I'm gonna let someone else read it, they can have fun reading my thoughts while doing so lol. I do not dog ear, only because I have a tendency to either use scrap paper bookmarks, the fancy bookmarks I keep forgetting I own. I LOVE LOVE LOVE reading in the bath. Unfortunately my family hated when I would read in the bath for two hours. Something about there only being one bathroom for six people lol. I do not judge. Again, who the fuck cares lol. I will be friends with anyone, regardelss of how they treat books. Carry them around everywhere, hoard them on bookshelves, tear out pages, blend them into a smoothie, fuck if I care lol.

28: Who is the most delightful character you've ever written? Why?

Oh goodness, I don't know. I'll always have a special fondness for Cam and Maddie, but I think the most fun character to write has actually been Q Tomlin. They're a nonbinary genderfluid teen navigating high school, coming to terms with a lot of structural homophobia/transphobia, and also starring in a Shakespeare play!

32: What is a line from a poem/novel/fanfic/etc that you return to from time and time again? How did you find it? What does it mean to you?

What, like in someone else's work?

I guess one of my favorite lines would be from a Dylan Thomas poem.

"Do not go gentle into that good night/ rage, rage against the dying of the light."

It's very much a line about not being complacent. I found it funnily enough in a trilogy I read as a teenager when I found the first book in my summer camp's lost and found. It was the last week of the year and we were encouraged to take things that weren't claimed, so of course I claimed the book lol. I've always been a bit of a rebellious thinker, so can you take a wild stab as to why I fell for that line?

40: Please share a poem with me, I need it.

See above poem, but also, here's one I wrote a while ago that I still can appreciate:

After Life

We walk across trails of light, endlessly winding through the night. A journey to the worlds beyond to find something that lets us bond and become something new, something true, something that we never knew we could be until we tried. Too many tears we have cried, and too many hearts were broken. All these words we left unspoken, a mark upon these hearts, torn apart, if only we had been so smart as to remember who we were together. Now we face the land of forever. Alone now, nowhere near close to that we fear, a different place to call home, our own. Draw me near, this place I roam. I want something as real as this, this glowing land of perpetual bliss. Let this be real, oh gracious god, for I can’t believe that I can trod upon these golden paths to salvation, in desperation, to something great, the blest creation of life in heaven. And now I know and can question how I came to deserve this afterlife, After all the pain and strife I have cause to others, to brothers, and those whose mothers names I cursed in frustration. Can I still receive re-creation of myself when I can’t be bothered to try to just be me?

We travel across these paths of light endlessly winding through the night. I guess I’ll never get it right. So let me fall, in ceaseless flight.

[firespirited]

Yesterday was a big day, I had to do quite the long car ride to get an x-ray with a friendly but right wing indoctrinated driver. Spent 2 hours redirecting regressive if not outright racist politics towards class solidarity and gently nudging him towards local involvement over worrying about big conspiracies. Deployed the 'as a foreigner/immigrant myself' uno reverse card a couple of times 😜. Play oblivious so they have to either admit that it's about race or back away from the subject. There was also a clear opening about not liking Muslim accommodations in schools worded as 'religious influence' and I said "oh! yeah! I'm so sick of wierdo catholics telling us how to live our lives like they own this country!" so fast I couldn't believe that just blurted out. [Catholic school wasn't that terrible actually, the headmaster made sure to keep church and state separate so to speak with opt in catéchisme but baptist and evangelical culture (including 2 years of xian high school) was suffocating and the gaslighting is built in, they nearly crushed the independant thought out of me.]

I'm wiped but mostly from pain, turns out the body braces to adjust to movement in cars and a lot of that goes to your neck. I'd done practice and knew to wear a neck brace and keep as relaxed as possible. I knew the pain was coming and I'm sure glad it only manifested as heavy dizziness on the day, but it’s always breathtaking how much pain a body can deploy in such a variety of ways.

I decided to do a walk anyway this evening as it was cooler than it's been all week and the pain was still at dull 6/10 slight rug burn on the shoulders and nausea levels but had to cut the walk short. It's now at 'I regret even getting out of bed today also my teeth and eyes seem to be reverberating like a glass that's been hit with a fork' levels.

Got to meet this adorable grey cat and it *loved* being scritched. I couldn't get decent photos due to having hands full so you'll have to imagine a smallish cat throwing the full weight of its head into my fingers despite nearly falling off its perch... and totally blissing out. Meanwhile, Lily had trotted down the road and some other cat decided to challenge (?) or seduce (?) her to the point where Lily the dog backed off - she's unfazed by threats usually, even from huge dogs so this cat must have had big energy to make Lily go 'what is wrong with this creature?'. I've never seen anything like that from a cat towards a dog it didn't know before. I have to imagine big floofy cat mistook Lily for another cat.

Fluff ball straight up walked down the road, crossed it and stared down my chill dog like it was going to fight her. *confused shrug* it ran when it saw me though.

I'll probably have to spend most of tomorrow in bed. I'll try and tag everything 'fast reblogged' correctly later on desktop.

Recent finds: dying pleather bags yielded some nice hardware: