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#Maybe i need to just sit and process it all
defmaybe · 3 days
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J’adore
5.2k words
aespa’s Yoo Jimin/Karina x Male Reader
Prequel to Not Shy
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A/N: Kind of extension to Not Shy! Also, this is my last sprint before the midterms lol, I’ll be back after that and try to write something good. Kinda rough bc there’s no beta-reading lol. Thanks for reading as always!!!
Spring
“You? A student council member?”
“It’s just the treasurer!”
It’s the easiest position, according to your seniors, which seems to be much, much more credible sources than Kai, the friend you got caught in a debate with.
“Just the treasurer. Mate, have you seen the lads from last year? I swear that one of them almost died.”
“I have to build my portfolio, man. You even have your dance club!” You retort, trying to grasp on something.
“Well, it’s because I like to dance.” Kai says in a mocking tone. He doesn't mean to be condescending, of course. He’s your best friend, after all. “Do you like to work with Excel?”
“I mean–”
“Board games? No, too nerdy. Cheerleader? No, too demanding. And then you fucking jumped onto the student council? I swear, man, you definitely have some kind of death wish,” he says.
You sigh, surrendering to his points. Still, you're too deep in the application process to turn back now. You look back at your phone, seeing all the completed questions in the form.
“I’m not leaving you behind, still,” Kai says, patting your back. “I’ll give you caffeine when you need it.”
Do you think you’re qualified to be a student council member?
Yes.
“I’m sending it now.”
“Good luck.”
Submit
Thank you for your submission. We will announce our selection by May 1st.
Summer
Maybe it was how the last year’s council members turned out to be. You were the only one who applied for the treasurer's position. Hell, even the other ones aren’t any more popular either. There was no one in the head of first aid, and they had to roll out another round of applications for that.
The fresh faces of the new student council members are all standing inside this meeting room—so determined, so passionate. Their chatters fill the room up with life.
You glance around the room. You’re familiar with some of them, walk-pasts in the hallways, sitting-fars in the classes, until one woman catches your eye.
Yoo Jimin, you’ve heard that she beat the second place applicant for president by quite a margin. Her confidence is probably what makes her so alluring to the students. Also, her face, fuck, her face, she’s the fucking epitome of perfection.
Maybe it’s the way you stare at her for just a little too long; she starts to walk towards you, and that’s when you fell into her trap for the first time.
She stops just a step away, offering you a handshake—firm, assured.
“Yoo Jimin,” she declares—stern, expressionless.
“Pleasure to meet you, Jimin.” You accept her grip, lips curling inward, letting out a minuscule smile—relaxed, reserved.
“We’ll be working together for the next year. I’m looking forward to it.” She keeps it professional in the expression she makes. There’s nothing to be made of it, except for the fact that she’s very reticent with her face.
You force out another small smile. “I’m also looking forward to it, Jimin.”
“Areas! I need two tables and four chairs. Parcels, get your equipment ready.”
The first meeting between the freshmen and their seniors is always the hardest to perfect. There’s the idea that the first impression defines the future of the relationship between the two. So, here you are, in your faculty’s First Meet event. You’re lucky that they let you use the air conditioners on the d-day. Those fucking run-throughs got you all melted.
You have little work to do today, having managed the proposals and preparing to do the post-production stuff. So, you’re at the core team’s table, playing whatever your old laptop can handle, until—
“Are you free?”
You look up from your screen to see the angelic figure that is Yoo Jimin standing in front of you, towering you with ease with you sitting in your seat.
“Uh–,” you can only let out a hesitation.
“I guess you’re—” she bends over the desk to see the gaming screen, before letting out a small laugh. “—free?”
“Y–Yes, Jimin.” A slight view of her cleavage can be seen with her posture, and you have to do your best to find something else to look at.
“Good. Can you help us carry a few tables?”
You look at your frail arms—should’ve done some more work at the gym. “If you want me to tear my biceps.”
Jimin chuckles, before closing on your ear, left hand pressing on your right thigh, “Don’t worry that you wouldn’t be able to jerk off, treasurer. I can do it for you.”
You freeze, not believing the words coming out of her mouth. Did she just say that? Such lewd words?
Jimin, sensing your tensed up body, pulls back from you and laughs. “Oh my god, look at you. I was just fucking with you!”
“Good grief, Jimin. You could’ve killed me,” you huff.
She shoots back a beam. “Come on, let’s get to work.”
Fall
The clicking sound of your keyboard and the scratches of the bills you’re arranging permeates the room this evening. Jimin is sitting on the other side of the trash-ridden table—stationeries, snack wraps—eyes unfocused as she swipes one short video after another. Her thoughts seem to be elsewhere now. Dinner? Bed? Someone? You’ll never know.
“Fucking hell, this bitch again,” she mutters under her breath, which you catch. You look up from the budget plan you’re working on, meeting her eyes.
“Sorry, Tinder stuff.”
You return her a tiny smile before going back to inputting the bills. Still, you can hear Jimin’s tossing and turning in her chair as she seems to type something into her phone, before smashing her thumb on the right side of its poor screen. You can’t help but let out a chuckle, one that she catches.
“Yeah, it’s pathetic, isn’t it?” Jimin rhetorizes, placing her phone on the table. “A student president that just can’t find any partner.”
You shrug, still typing, “Well, the work is gruelling.” And she chuckles at your statement.
“Yeah, I guess so. But it’s just, how to explain?” She furrows her eyebrows, tapping her chin to seek the right word in the air, before coming to an answer. “I just can’t find the right person, you know? Half of the line is gone once I show any bit of confidence, and the other half are, well, clingy ass bitches.”
You smile back at her, trying to give her some solace in solitude. “I’m sure you’ll find the right person soon, Jimin. You like–have the whole faculty in your hands.”
She gives you a weak smile. “You always have pleasant words for everyone, treasurer.”
You smile back before returning to your accounting work, unbeknownst to the light bulb brightening up inside her head.
“So, how’s your love life?” She asks, rising from the other side. She leans forward ever so slightly, hands supporting her frame on the white table, slightly revealing the valley of her breasts.
You break yourself from the laptop, once again, meeting her cleavage in your line of sight for a split second. It’s magnetic, but you’re able to resist it, for now.
“Hmm?”
“I mean… you don’t seem to be an awful choice for women, or men, judging from… how many months?”
“Four,” and you gulp.
“Yeah, four months with you, my treasurer. But I’ve never quite caught you being involved in anything,”—she stands up straight, before slowly striding towards your seat, hips swaying at each nifty step—“romantic.”
You clench your eyes ever so tightly at her alluring motion—the swaying hips, the crossing steps—as if there’s anything to examine but her burning lust. “Well, Jimin, I don’t think the passive mid-table guys get much,” you state.
“Is that so? Because you don’t seem to belong at the mid-table.” The distance between you two is shrinking, slowly. And with a few more small steps, you find her towering over you, chest basking in front of your face.
Jimin bends down slowly, revealing just a slight sight of her gorgeous cleavage. The poor crop top is struggling to hold her supple flesh within, even with the workshop shirt helping. You shift just slightly in your seat.
Your eyes are doing their best to resist the magnetic force, but her big brown eyes aren't a sanctuary, either.
“Thanks, miss president.”
Her Dior J’adore is enrapturing you.
“You know, I notice the perfume you wear every day, even if it’s just CK One.” She forces sultry into her perceptive words, and to say, it works. She drags her right middle finger along the length of your arm, lighting a fire in its trail.
You try to keep your composure; it works, for now. She doesn’t seem to notice the sweat hanging off your forehead yet.
“Or how you dress so damn well to class, even if it’s some fuckass subject,” Jimin continues, tracing her hands up to your forearm now.
Your breath hitches, and you can just connect the dots so easily.
“W–Why me, though, Jimin?”
“Oh, clever boy, I just need the real thing, that’s all,” she coos. Her digits are playing with the line of your collarbones now. 
“See, I’m just so fucking sick of my—well, what’s the word, devices. They’re pleasurable, sure, but unlike a real person, which in this case—is you—” Her hand grabs your chin from behind, and you can’t find any resistance. Her sonic reduces into a sensual whisper into your ear. “—they lack warmth.”
“S–So, do you want to have—”
“Sex? Yes, I want you inside me, baby. I want you body clashing against mine, while you moan my name like you’re some common whore.”
It’s haywire, your mind. You are lost in her—her voice, her face, her body, everything that’s about Jimin. Is she really inviting you to have sex with her? Is this interaction even real?
“So, what do you say, wanna go somewhere after this? Somewhere—small, somewhere—private.” Her voice dives into a whisper beside your ear, and you can feel a smile forming beside it. “I’m sure you can work on your bills—anywhere.”
You stare forward, trying to look unfazed to cover your crumbling composure.
“I–I can work on the bills anywhere, Jimin.” Your voice betrays you.
She gives a quiet laugh, “Good to know, treasurer,” before lightly grabbing your chin, with her index and middle finger resting on your lips. Are they seeking silence or entry?
Slowly, they push your upper lip ever so slightly, eliciting a whimper from you. Fuck, is she trying to—
“You know what to do, baby.”
Rejection.
Hesitation.
Submission.
You open your mouth for her—now courtesy of Yoo Jimin. You take in her fingers. They’re cold from the air conditioner. Bite. Lick. Swallow. You close your eyes while doing so, absorbing her taste with your tongue. You feel you’re under her control—so submissive. It’s ecstatic.
“God, do you like being called a whore? Because you’re acting like one right now,” Jimin asks.
You profusely nod at her statement, continuing to suck on her fingers.
“Then keep doing it, whore.”
Your eyes roll into the back of your head as you can hear her giggle. And as your vision comes back to her, the free hand is rubbing against her clothed core now. Mewling sounds can be heard.
“God, keep sucking it, baby. I’ve never cummed as fast as this before.”
“Ngh.” And you keep sucking her fingers.
A sound of the door stops you in your tracks though.
“Guys, I need a few chairs–am I interrupting something?”
Ning Yizhuo, head of student welfare, barges into the room. She stares straight at you two. Good thing Jimin pulls her digits out and puts them behind her back before Yizhuo’s eyes catch sight of you glistening on her, leaving you stranded in your burning desire for your president.
Maybe it’s the way your eyes are still fluttering. Maybe it’s the way your mouth ever so slightly hangs open. Maybe it’s your quick breaths.
Yizhuo wants to know what’s up.
“We’re just–” Jimin tries to find the right word in your eyes. Her blinks are rapid. She’s concerned. She’s afraid.
“You’re–what?” Yizhuo isn’t a patient figure. She’s trying to gauge something out of Karina.
“I–I’m adjusting his posture! O–Our dear treasurer has a bad sitting posture and–”
“Cut the shit, Jimin. What the fuck did you guys do?”
“S–See, he’s sitting a lot, you know? B–Bills. Accounting. Excel stuff.” Jimin’s brows hint at the concern within her chuckle. She pushes the middle of your back to set you straight up. As you follow her move, Yizhuo clenches her eyes.
“Just get me some chairs and don’t fuck inside this room.”
Jimin swings her door open, and as expected, every single bit of it is immaculately kept clean. There’s not a single piece of trash on the floor of her white room; the table is meticulously arranged; the bed is folded. There’s a Meteora vinyl placed on her shelf. God, what a tasteful woman.
“Drop your bag.”
You comply as she also does so.
And she immediately pounces on your body, consuming your taste and scent at your nape. Her lips are wet, sending shocks through your pliant frame.
“Mmph, keep this perfume, baby. I just wanna have this scent of you every day.”
It’s CK One.
She plants her kisses along your neck—standing up straight—ever so determined to make you hers. Her hands lock your shifting, shaking body in place, despite being so eager to feel every inch of you—up and down.
“So—pliant, so—submissive,” she whispers.
“I wouldn’t go that far,” you deflect, trying to have a hold of the battle. There’s a glint of brattiness inside you that wants to resist her just a little, just before you give in.
“Is that so?” Jimin mewls, before pushing you onto the bed.
“I’m not letting you have me that easily, miss president,” you say with your back against her soft cushion. Jimin is straddling her lean, lengthy legs over yours. She looks so damn tall from this view—you lying beneath her.
“Sucking my fingers, then decide to be a bratty bitch right now—” She lightly taps the tip of your nose, also scrunching hers. “—I like that.”
You say nothing, giving her just a wink from below.
“Oh, baby, I’ll have you scream my name so many times.”
“Fucking make me then.”
And fires ignite in her eyes.
She dives onto your left ear—nibbling, biting, swallowing, whatever she can do with her mouth without tearing your auricle off. Her deep moans send suppressed shudders through your neurons.
Jimin spreads saliva all over your ear, no sign of relenting. Slurping sounds of her flesh ring in your head. She plants each lick with purpose, and it sends jolts and jolts through your body. Still, you’re far from falling apart—tethered on the ground.
“Tsk, i–is this the best y–you can do?”
“Oh, baby, you’re already stuttering? I can do more if you want~,” she tastefully threatens. Then, she brings her right hand into play, tilting your chin up. Your mouth is right beside her neck. The pale smoothness of her skin is presented in front of you, and you just can’t help but—
“F–Fuck!” Jimin yells, clearly enraptured with the swipes of tongue you are giving her. Still, she keeps spreading her saliva on your ear as if it’s hers (it’s hers).
“Oh, b–baby boy, maybe you can use your t–tongue on other things instead,” she whines.
“Your cunt?” You keep stretching your tongue onto her nape, getting a taste of her sweat.
She pulls back from you, robbing the sensations away from your throat. “Clever, now just lie like this. I’m riding your pretty face.”
Jimin then takes off her purple lace panties, giving you a hint of her wet cunt—unshaved—as she lifts her leg, before stuffing the garment onto your nose. Fuck, her musk is so intense; you can just die happily right here.
“You just love it, don’t you?”
You sheepishly nod, pressing her panties against your nose even tighter, eliciting laughs from her sinful mouth.
“I think that’s enough, baby. I wanna fuck your face now,” she says, before tossing away the filthy garment.
Jimin then moves forward on her knees, bringing her heat closer and closer to your face. God, the fact that she’s unshaved only brings you higher. You need to slurp her juice; you need it on your face, you–
“Ready?”
Her cunt is hovering above you now, she’s pulling her skirt up, letting you see her face for the last time before being buried under her.
You nod.
And she sinks onto your face.
The first contact is soft, so, so soft. You’re practically making out with pussy, as she shakes above you erratically. There isn’t much light, with her skirt darkening your vision of what’s around, but it’s like you’d complain. You’re eating your student president out in her room, and you’re doing it so, so well that it sends shivers through her body, again and again.
“Ngh, f–fuck!” Jimin shouts from above—the things you’d do to see her face right now, to see an effect you’re having on her.
You say nothing, just keep lapping up her folds enthusiastically. Her juice drips into your mouth—sweet.
Jimin starts to grind her hips, as the moans grow louder. She’s getting wetter, and you’re still happily drinking her sugary nectar—drunk with it.
“Ah, ah, y–you’re doing well, my treasurer.”
You give her a thumbs up. You keep licking her cunt as if your life is depending on it. She moans so loud; everyone on this floor is probably going to hear that, but you don’t care anymore. The only thing in your head right now is to please Jimin—only Yoo Jimin.
And you can feel her thighs tense, shaking with pleasure. She’s going to cum. Her moans grow more chaotic and shorter than they were.
“Fuck, fuck, I’m cumming, I’m cumming, fuck!”
She cums hard, collapsing onto the bed, cunt still on your face, ass up in the air. Her core clenches and clenches on your face, and she just forgets to breathe as her hips convulse.
“No squirt today, huh?” you joke from below.
She snaps back into the situation she’s in, sneering, “Fuck off, don’t fucking play stupid with me, wh–whore.”
You laugh, “Alright, alright, let’s get to the main course, shall we?”
“Y–Yeah.”
Jimin lifts off from you, leaving a string of her lubricant between your lips and her cunt.
“God, that’s hot,” you just can’t help but say it.
She giggles, and you can now see the sweat forming on her forehead; there’s beauty in it.
You two, in a haste, discard all of your clothes until you’re left with nothing—just bare bodies on the bed together. You’re sitting opposite of her, expecting her to say something.
She looks ethereal under the room light. The messy hair, the perfect features, the bare body, they all combine into the epitome of perfection right in front of you. Fuck, she’s gorgeous.
“Can I suck your tits?” you mutter. Fuck reticence, you need her, now.
She chuckles. “Sure, but only if I’m on top of you.”
“You just have to find a way to dominate me, don’t you?” you huff.
“Don’t say it like you don’t like it, baby.” She caresses your cheeks, and you shiver at her touch.
You lie down, as she slowly eclipses the light above both of you. Her large breasts are hanging down so close to your face. And—
“F–Fuck!”
You latch your mouth on her right breast as if it’s innate, with your hand kneading on the other. She lets out empyrean moans that only makes you want to suck on them even more. God, you can do this all day.
And not wanting to wait anymore, she impales her cunt with your cock, and you can only moan into her tits. This sensation, it’s overwhelming. Her velvety walls are hugging you so, so tightly. It’s so warm. She’s warm.
“Fuck,” she groans, eyes rolling into the back of her head. “Your cock is so well-bent, baby. It’s hitting my g-spot so good.”
“T–Thanks, J–Jimin.” Your mind is so damn clouded by the pleasure that you can say nothing but her name right now.
And a crack starts to form when she moves—up and down. Her unshaved cunt dragging along your digit, emanating pleasure all over your body from the core.
“B–Babe, c–can you stop s–sucking my tits?” she pleads.
You pull yourself out of her mounds, as she’s still riding you like there’s no tomorrow, and you let out small moans at each contact. “W–What? Ngh.”
“I wanna kiss you.”
You freeze under her. She’s still motioning herself to squeeze the cum out of you, whimpering each time your cock hits the hilt. Is it a confession? Does she love—
“B–Babe,” she brings you back to the mortal world.
“Y–Yeah, kiss me.”
She invades your mouth as if it wasn’t already hers at the second she sits on your face. Your tongues intertwine in a quest to declare their feelings of their owners.
Your hands are still squeezing her breasts. It’s addictive. You press and press into her flesh just to feel her as much as you can. This might as well be the only body you want to have just to yourself, as you dedicate yours to her. Every curve, every contour, every limb, you want her; you want her to want you; you need her. This kiss, fuck, it’s doing wonders to you.
She’d be the one to break off from the kiss to pant above you, hips still smashing into yours in a perfect rhythm.
“W–Wanna go out with me?” she asks.
She’s desperate, all the Tinder dates, all the–
“Babe, I–I fucking know that it’s desperate, yes or no. Fuck those Tinder dates, fuck those guys and girls, I–I want to go out with you, t–treasurer,” she pants.
Maybe it’s her J’adore that’s permeating all over you. Maybe it’s the way your hips are clashing into each other. Maybe, just maybe, it’s the glint in her eyes.
But if you have to recall, it’d be the confidence she’s radiating in clashing your flesh together just right now.
You nod.
Jimin smiles, pulling you into another kiss. You swear it can tear you apart if you have to let this woman go—figuratively.
She pulls off, her breaths becoming shorter and shorter again. “C–Can you cum with me, baby?”
Again, you nod, smiling. It’s inside your loins, building up, building up. Your body tenses up beneath her, same as hers. It’s there. It’s there.
“Fuck, baby, breed me. I’m yours, just breed me, just–ugh!”
And her whole body freezes, juices flowing onto your crotch. Her face is contorted by the pleasure coursing through her. Again, she forgets to breathe, back arching. You don’t slow down, though. Your orgasm is coming too.
“B–Babe–ah!”
It breaks. You busy yourself inside her to the hilt. Just like her, you forget to breathe. You shoot spurts of your seed deep into her womb, intending to breed her as her wish. Your cock shakes inside her, as she moans at each twitch.
It subsides, eventually. The shots get softer and softer to the point the cum just dribbles off the tip of you now. Fuck, your juices even leak out of her cunt onto your crotch, mixed together.
“F–Fuck,” is all she can say, before collapsing onto you, chest pressed up against yours.
“The plan’s still up?”
“Yeah.”
And she slips to the side, embracing you from behind, as you two doze off in the nocturne.
“Can I use your toothbrush?”
A long drag of uncertainty comes from the outside. Sun has risen hours ago, yet you two are still in the drowsy state.
“Or do I have to kiss you again for the answer, Jimin?”
“Put your morning breath away from me!”
At least she’s quick with her riposte.
As you brush your teeth, naked, she saunters into the bathroom, still similarly bare from last night. Her breasts bounce ever so slightly with each step in the mirror. Despite the disheveled appearance, her natural beauty shines through the mess—a seraphic being, one might say.
“Ha, yeah, I know I’m pretty, baby,” she says. “People would kill to have a body like me.”
You finish your clean up, before saying, “You’re insufferable, you know?”
Jimin laughs, before giving you a quick peck on the cheek, emanating mellow all over your face. Fuck, you can feel the blood rushing to your erection now.
“You too, babe.” She smiles, before grabbing her mouthwash for a gargling.
Your cock, again, finds the condition to rise in front of this woman. It’s twitching, and you just have to turn back before she notices it.
Still, her sharp eyes find you, and she gives you a small slap on your bare ass, sending pleasure rushing through your body.
“Hey!” she growls with the mouthwash, before quickly disposing of it. “You’re fucking hard again?”
“I–I–I–uh–”
Jimin then presses herself up against your back, arms ever so tightly trapping you from behind in a hug. It’s warm. She’s warm.
“Let me, baby,” she whispers against your wobbling right ear. “I can’t have my co-workers’ needs go unsated.”
“F–Fucking hell.”
In one careful motion, Jimin slides her arms down to your erection, right hand grabbing the length. “Wouldn’t mind some respect from my baby boy~” Her grip and the languid, careful strokes make your legs wobble.
“Tsk, n–no fucking way, J–Jimin,” you muster any inhibition you have left to deflect.
“Well, then.” Jimin then tightens her hold on your cock, transpiring both pain and pleasure to you. “How about now?”
“Nghhhh, f–fuck,” you cry out, the contorted expression appears in the mirror.
“Just like that, baby, moan for me. Show me who owns you,” Jimin coos, loosening her hold a slight, still keeping the adagio tempo.
“Nnnh, J–Jimin.”
“Good boy, good boy,” she murmurs.
She drags her filthy hand up and down your cock so leisurely, finding the rhythm for your pliancy. She strokes and strokes to build you up to the second release with her, this time by her hand.
It feels like eternity—the way her unhurried digits find the pace that would make you want so much more, or how she whispers ‘good boy’ into your ear every time she wants a whiff of reassurance of control. It’s like she needs one, anyway, judging by how you’re moaning like a bitch right now.
“God, you’re making so much sound for me.” The way she swipes her index finger at the tip of your cock on each stroke, fuck, you can fall onto the floor right here and now. “Wanna see your face in the mirror, baby?”
You turn your head leftwards to find reflections of a contorted face and a grin side by side. Her hand is diligent as ever—building you up to your inevitable release.
“What do you say, baby? Wanna see our faces in the mirror?” she inquires again. You can feel a mischievous smile beside your ear.
“Ngnh, a–alright.”
With ease, she forces your body to turn into your image of the ball of lust—the shower of kisses on your neck; the hand sliding up and down your cock; the thigh pressing up against your ass. You shift and shift within her restraint, and that seems to only fuel her fire.
“Moan some more for me, baby. I wanna hear your voice. I want my men moaning.”
You comply, letting out a series of whimpers just for your student president. The sensation of her hand is so damn enthralling—each slide, each nick of a finger, each twist of her wrist, they are all designed to make you surrender to her.
“Good boy. Your moans are so pleasing to hear, you know that?”
“Nngh, t–thanks, Jimin.”
“Wanna up the ante, baby? I can do it faster~” As if her languid tempo isn’t already doing its job in trapping you inside her overflowing lust.
You hesitate, finding yourself wanting this act to go on to such lengths, maybe even when the sun sets again. Being under her comforting warmth is too satisfying.
“I–I don’t know, Jimin.”
“Oh, this baby can’t decide? Guess I’ll just have to–”
She suddenly lets go of your length, cutting your string of desire so easily. You whine, as Jimin lets out a laugh.
“Don’t!” you say in a rush, and letting go the hand you haven’t realized you’ve been holding—hers.
Jimin giggles. “Say please, baby.” She tightens her hug on you, squeezing the plea out.
Your eyes meet hers in the mirror.
“Please, Jimin.”
“Good boy.” And she wraps her hand around your erection again, casually stroking it.
“Ngh.”
The sound of her jerking your shaft fills the room. It’s heavenly—her voluptuous chest pressing up against your arching back with right hand busy sliding on your rod. She does it so cleanly—the technique, the pace. You swear you will cum by the second she whispers another ‘good boy’ into your welcoming ears.
As if she knows your inevitable release, she seeks a higher speed on your cock, stroking it with a swiftness that tries to draw out your moan and your cum as much as she can.
“Ngh, J–Jimin,” you whimper.
“Oh, gonna cum already, baby?” Jimin giggles at your crumble, before giving a peck on your left cheek. “Go on, cum for me. Cum, just like you did last night inside me.”
White spots start to form within your vision. Your breaths become more erratic. It’s there. It’s there.
“Jimin~”
And you explode all over her mirror, painting white streaks on it. You are left with ecstasy on your face as Jimin smiles at your release. Your body shrieks and shudders in her embrace. Your cock twitches in her hand, sending flying ropes of cum everywhere. Fuck.
“Yes, baby, just like that.” Her voice is deep—so seductive.
You continue to shake in her hold, not being able to subside from your high so quickly. Your release grows lighter and lighter in her hand, until it comes out in drops, finally letting you catch your breath.
“Good boy,” Jimin says, before forcing your body towards hers. You are spun around, and she gives you a kiss.
It’s short, but it’s powerful—no tongue fighting for dominance, no slurping sounds, just a kiss.
And she pulls back from it once she’s satisfied, judging from the smile on her face.
“Wanna do this again?” she asks.
“Definitely—well—maybe. You know Yizhuo would beat our asses if she catches us again, right?”
“Just shut up, babe. She won’t know if you’re good with secrets like me.”
You pout, bringing out a laugh from her.
Winter
“It’s going well, isn’t it?” Kai asks.
You give him a small smile. “It’s bearable, yeah.”
“Good to know, good to know.” He then takes a sip of his latte from his cup, looking outside.
“Fuck, I forgot to ask you this,” you say. “Are you seeing anyone?”
“Oh yeah! In fact, there’s a woman I've been seeing recently, Yizhuo. You probably know her, right? You guys are working together,” Kai answers.
“Oh,” you utter. “Oh.”
He chuckles, before continuing, “Yeah, I know it’s weird–”
“No, no, not at all, bro,” you deflect with a chuckle along with him. “I’m happy that you’re happy.”
Kai, still chuckling, inquires, “How about you? It’s gotta be more than ‘bearable’ for you to be all happy like this.”
You give him a smile.
827 notes · View notes
lemonlover1110 · 11 hours
Text
𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐬
Satoru Gojo
[Chapter 30] Graduation
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Pairing: Satoru Gojo x f!Reader
Warnings: MDNI, Smut, Fluff
*THIS IS IT thank you all so much for reading, this truly has been a journey and I couldn't have done it without your support. love you all so much🫂❤️
**Too lazy to put all the smut warnings, it's nothing too extreme just some face sitting and whatnot :p
Discord +18 - Twitter - Ko-Fi
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“Are you ready to go?” Satoru asks, walking into your room to find you sitting in front of the vanity. You’re finishing up your makeup, putting the lash touch on your lips. His heart skips a beat, and he could faint right at this moment. He’s the luckiest man alive. He still has to rush you, “You can’t be late to your own graduation.”
“Is Anzu ready?” You question, and Satoru hums in response. He walks over to the bed and takes a seat to watch you.
“What? Do you not think I’m responsible enough? I can handle a baby.” Satoru says, as if you didn’t find your daughter nearly chewing an extension cord yesterday because he took his eyes off her for a second. You’re taking an awfully long time to answer the question which makes Satoru scoff, “She’s ready and with your mom.”
“Good.” You answer, turning your attention back to yourself yet again. Which type of earrings will be best? Satoru got you some beautiful diamond earrings for this occasion but you’re not sure you want to wear them– You don’t want to show off to everybody that your fiancé is filthy rich.
“Why don’t you put on the ones I got you?” Satoru sees that you’re struggling to pick the earrings you’ll wear for the night, so he’ll make a suggestion. You ignore him though, and he can’t help but laugh. He stands up, “I’ll go check on Ren while you finish up then.”
“Yeah, make sure he showered.” You tell him, and Satoru hums in response. He walks out of the room, getting ready to deal with the nine-year-old even though the child only seems to listen to you. The man feels like neither of his kids really listen to him, but he guesses he deserves it.
You smile back at yourself in the mirror, elated with how things go. Accepting Satoru’s breakfast offer as a date made your life change– You’d argue for the better, though some people didn’t want you and Satoru to get back together. It took you a while to officially start dating, since Satoru was married; even though you knew his marriage wasn’t authentic, you didn’t want to interfere with any of the mess that was going on.
Satoru began the divorce process with Sayo not too long after asking you out. It was a mutual decision that they kept hidden for as long as they possibly could. Even after their divorce was finalized, they refused to share the news with Sayo’s parents. You understood completely, knowing that it was a bigger issue than what it seemed. You had Satoru all to yourself either way, you didn’t really care what a random pair of old people thought. 
The truth came to light eventually, when you got pregnant with your baby girl. It ended Sayo’s relationship with her parents, but time has passed and she’s much happier without them. It was around two years ago, when Ren kept begging for a baby brother, and Satoru convinced you that it would be a great idea. You wanted another baby so there wasn’t the need for too much convincing either way. Unluckily for Ren, Anzu ended up being a baby girl. 
If you were given the chance to go back in time and change something, you’d keep everything the same. Maybe you would’ve kicked Satoru’s groin once or twice, but you’d do it all again. For Ren, for Anzu. For Satoru as well, though you wouldn’t admit it outloud.
“Ren isn’t ready!” Satoru yells, and you can’t help but chuckle as you roll your eyes. Your sweet baby boy is slowly becoming disobedient, and it’s a bit frustrating. You knew it was going to happen eventually, it’s just hard to believe that your baby boy is slowly setting off on his own adventure.
“Ren! Come here!” You yell, and within a matter of seconds your son comes running into your room. He doesn’t listen to Satoru, but you? He’ll listen to almost everything you have to say.
“What’s up?” He asks, and you look him over. You shake your head disappointedly, seeing that he’s still wearing pajamas.
“Do you want to stay home? Mrs. Gojo is more than happy to babysit.” Even when the woman is about to become your mother-in-law, you refuse to call her anything other than Mrs. Gojo. She’s the grandmother of your two kids, but you refuse to acknowledge her in any other way.
You barely have a relationship with her, for many reasons. Main one is that Satoru doesn’t really want to associate himself with her, not after everything that went down with Ren. Frankly, the only reason he even speaks to her is because Ren adores her– Though you believe that his opinion about his grandma is slowly changing because Ren quickly shakes his head.
“We’re going to her home later anyway, you can stand behind.” You assure him, but he shakes his head before darting out of the room. You almost laugh before yelling, “Make sure you don’t stink!”
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“There she is!” You hear Satoru yell, and you turn around to find him with your little family. Your one-year-old squeals at the sight of her mother, while Ren glares at the baby for stealing his spotlight. You walk over to them, taking your baby Anzu into your arms before leaning down to kiss Ren’s forehead. 
“Did you have fun there, Ren?” You ask him, and he shakes his head. He’s not going to have much fun watching a bunch of people that he doesn’t know walk across a stage. Satoru didn’t even give the child his phone. 
“Ignore him, he’s been whining all day long. Where’s my kiss?” Satoru quickly changes the topic and you roll your eyes before pecking his lips. He tries to hug you without squashing the baby, saying, “Congratulations, baby. I’m so proud of you.”
“Thank you, Satoru.” You respond, pecking his lips once again. You notice a couple of missing people from your group, and you question, “Where’s my mom? And Sayo and Shoko? Their little guy?”
“Bathroom.” Ren answers, and you raise your brows. All of them? You can’t exactly blame them, the ceremony was a long one.
“How about we–” You begin but you notice that your little guy is pouty. You know the reason immediately, so you hand Satoru your baby girl and crouch down to bring the child into a hug. “Am I not getting congratulations from the person that I care about the most?”
“Anzu can’t talk yet.” He answers, which almost makes you laugh. Almost. He’s so jealous of his baby sister, which is kind of ironic considering he begged you to have a baby. His attitude certainly changed when he realized that the baby requires a lot of time and attention.
“Ren, you’re the apple of my eye.” You tell him, though the child refuses to listen. Cuddles are less frequent lately since you have a crying baby that needs you, and you barely play with him anymore. “Can mommy at least get a congratulations?”
“Congratulations, mom.” Ren responds, and you feel your heart melt. Even when he’s mad at you, he’s your cute little guy. You’re rubbing your cheek with his, being as affectionate as you can be with the little guy. Though he ends up pushing you away, telling you, “You’re doing too much.” 
“Jeez, what is it with you? One moment you’re all jealous and the next you’re saying I’m doing too much.” You chuckle, standing up. You take the baby from your fiancé, knowing that she still has a long way before she can tell you that you’re doing too much. 
“Can we leave before we bump into any traffic?” Satoru asks, reading the time on his watch. Not that he’s thrilled to go to his mother’s house, but he’d prefer to be there than sitting in traffic for hours on end. He sees your eyes wandering around for the rest of your group but before you get any ideas he reminds you, “You don’t want to sit in a car with a screaming one-year-old, do you?”
“Yeah… I guess we’ll just meet them at your mom’s place.” You answer, knowing that once your baby girl begins to cry, it’s hard to get her to stop. Good thing for you, she’s usually all smiles and giggles.
“She’s drooling.” Ren points at his sister, who’s making a mess on your gown. Ren then turns his attention to his dad, asking, “I wasn’t a messy baby like her, right?”
“I wouldn’t know.” Satoru mutters, and you glare at him.
“Let’s get going.”
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The graduation party is for you, a way for Mrs. Gojo to congratulate you on finally finishing your bachelor’s. In reality, it’s a way for her to see her grandchildren. A way for her to spoil Ren and dote on Anzu. 
Things between the two of you go back to the way they were: she barely notices you and you don’t acknowledge her. You’re no longer relying on her in any way, and apart from asking about your kids, the woman won’t bother to contact you. She’s fine with the change of you becoming Satoru’s fiancée– And even if she was opposed to it, Satoru won’t listen to her. As a matter of fact, Satoru never calls her first.
You’re in the kitchen, preparing yourself a plate of food, watching as Mrs. Gojo holds your baby. It’s odd to watch her be so… Soft with someone. Sure, she enables Ren and is willing to do anything he wants, but Ren sets the tone. You’ve never watched her with a baby before.
“Who’s my pretty girl?” The woman is putting a baby voice for fuck’s sake, something she never did for her own son. Maybe it’s the fact that she’s just grandma now, she doesn’t have to worry about anything but her grandchildren. Anzu is giggling, so Mrs. Gojo is doing something right.
“I can’t believe that’s my mother.” Satoru approaches you, a little disgusted to watch his mother like this. He should be happy, but it’s a little weird to watch such a cold woman put on a baby voice and entertain a baby. “That is my mother, right? They didn’t change her after her facelift?”
“I’m right here, Satoru. Just because I’m holding a baby doesn’t mean that my ears have disappeared.” She quickly scolds her son, and you can’t help but laugh. “I didn’t get a facelift either.”
“Right, you just spent two months in South Korea touring.” Satoru retorts, grabbing a plate for himself. They begin to bicker, and as entertaining as it is to watch them, you leave them alone to sort out their own issues.
You walk to the living room to find Ren playing with Shoko and Sayo’s baby– Something that he won’t do with his own baby sister. You’re not sure if it’s because she’s not the baby brother that Ren wanted or if it’s because he’s not getting the same amount of attention as before. Sayo keeps a close eye on the child, not because she doesn’t trust him, but because she’s an overprotective mother. You sit beside him, excited to watch him play and be sweet with a baby, even if it isn’t your baby girl.
“He’s so sweet. Is he like this with Anzu?” Sayo asks, ruffling Ren’s hair as he plays peek-a-boo with the ten-month-old baby. You scoff, as if. Your reaction is the best answer that she needs, and she chuckles. She’s not sure if that’s normal behavior between siblings since she’s an only child.
“What do you mean you aren’t the sweetest older brother to Anzu? You were so excited to be a big brother.” Shoko points out, and Ren’s brows come together. He knows he can’t be mean to his auntie Shoko… So he simply glares at her.
“I don’t want to play with your baby anymore.” He responds. It’s his way of punishing Shoko for the question.
“Damn, can’t take any sort of criticism. You really don’t need a DNA test, that’s one hundred percent Satoru’s kid.” Shoko says, which earns a laugh from you.
“Babe…” Sayo says through gritted teeth, which makes Shoko roll her eyes. God forbid she points out one thing.
“He’s just a little jealous, but he loves his baby sister.” You tease him, pinching your baby boy’s cheek, and he puffs out a breath. Maybe he does like her a bit. Ren doesn’t defend himself, deciding that he’s just going to grab some food from your plate as a punishment. Though it isn’t exactly a punishment for you, you’re always happy to watch your baby eat. “Do you want me to make you a plate, honey?”
“I’m not hungry.” He mutters, crossing his arms. He stands up from his seat, and walks to the stairs, planning to go to the room that his grandma has for him. He might not have his parents undivided attention anymore, but at the very least he still has a room that’s full of games that’s just for him (as if he didn’t have one in your home either). 
“He really is Satoru’s kid…” Shoko comments when Ren is out of sight, and Sayo scolds her again.
“He is, he looks just like me.” Satoru pops into the living room unannounced, which catches Shoko off guard. He wasn’t supposed to hear that, since it’s a critique of his character but she doesn’t find a care to give. He comes back holding Anzu after nearly having to fight his mother to get her. He sits down next to you, reaching for some of the food on your plate. “But I’m guessing it wasn’t a compliment since it’s coming from you.”
“I can be nice, you know.” Shoko responds, and Satoru laughs as if a joke had just come from her lips. Nice… He’ll believe it when he sees it though. Satoru takes a bite of the food that he’s taken from your plate, and he grimaces.
“Did my mom cook or what? This is disgusting.” Satoru can’t even chew the food. Unluckily for him, he doesn’t have anywhere where he can spit the food so he’s forced to swallow. Anzu is screaming, little hand trying to reach for the food. Satoru covers her eyes, “Don’t even look there, my love. There’s no way I’m letting you eat that.”
“It’s not that bad.” You tell him, tasting the food yourself. 
“Well what is it? Am I getting a plate for myself or not?” Shoko asks, reaching over to grab some food from your plate as well. Suddenly your plate has become everyone’s plate; you’re used to it at home with Satoru and Ren, but now Shoko is on the list.
“I wouldn’t trust her with food, she’s always claiming she wants to eat the baby’s cheeks.” Satoru argues, and you click your tongue knowing damn well that he says the same thing.
“Anzu has the cutest, chubbiest cheeks, I understand.” Sayo chimes in before looking at her own baby and kissing his cheeks. Shoko takes a bite, keeping her face neutral as she chews the food. 
“It’s not that bad, Satoru. You’re just dramatic.” Shoko responds, and Satoru pouts. He brings some of the food to the baby’s lips– Even though he claimed he wasn’t going to let her taste, he needs someone to prove him right and that someone will be his one-year-old daughter that spits everything back up.
“Taste this, love.” Satoru says as Anzu bites into the food. Within moments it dribbles down her chin, and back into Satoru’s hand. He’s grossed out, but at least his point has been proven. “Anzu doesn’t like it so…”
“Are you trying to prove your point by using a baby that just stopped breastfeeding?” Shoko questions, and Satoru glares at her. She can’t help but chuckle, “Man, your son is just like you.”
“I’m going to talk to him since he appreciates me.” Satoru stands up, and begins to walk to the stairs, but your voice stops him. You call out his name, and he expects some sort of apology from you but instead you ask,
“Have you seen my mom?”
“She popped into the kitchen to talk to my mom.” He answers before leaving. You’re unphased by the response. The women that don’t get along in any other circumstance, sit together to talk about their grandchildren. They can be cordial with each other once every six months.
Though Satoru doesn’t pay much attention to them, his focus right now is on his baby boy that sits alone in the game room. Ren sits down on the floor, reading to himself. Satoru doesn’t want to interrupt the healthy habit, but at the same time he doesn’t want Ren to sit by himself during the party. He takes a moment to wash his hands before joining Ren.
“Why are you here, honey? We’re celebrating your mom downstairs.” Satoru sits down beside Ren on the floor, and he feels ten years older as he hears his bones crack. Ren barely looks up from his book, side-eyeing his sister, which makes Satoru want to roll his eyes. Isn’t he a little too old to be jealous of a baby? Matter of fact, he begged to be a big brother. “What is your issue with her? What has she done to you?”
“Nothin’.” Ren claims, his eyes landing on his book again. Satoru sighs, letting the baby on the floor so she can walk around and do as she pleases. She chooses to stay nearby, walking over to her brother to take the book that he has in his hands. “See.”
“Anzu, go over there. Chew on the power cords.” Satoru redirects her elsewhere, and the baby whines because she wants something else. “So she takes all your stuff, is that why you don’t like her? You have a lot, Ren.”
“Not just my stuff. Everyone likes her better. You, mom, granny, grammy, the nanny. I used to be everyone’s favorite but then the cute baby came along.” Ren confesses, and Satoru fights back the urge of pointing out that he called Anzu cute. It’s not about the baby right now, Satoru reminds himself.
“You’re still everyone’s favorite, Ren.” Satoru tells a little white lie– There are no favorites in the family, he loves both of his kids equally. But the baby can’t understand him, it’s why he told her to chew on a power cord. “Everyone is just excited about the new baby, it’s not that you’re not the favorite anymore.”
“Why does she get away with everything then?” Ren asks as if he didn’t know any better. He’ll act dumb simply because he’s jealous. He doesn’t ask why Sayo and Shoko’s baby gets away with everything, because Ren knows that it’s just a baby… He just doesn’t have the same feelings about Anzu.
“Well for one thing she goes potty in her pants so… She isn’t really conscious about her actions.” Satoru answers, and Ren puffs out a breath. Satoru got him there. “Anzu just needs a lot of attention because she’s–”
“Don’t do that!” Ren cuts off his father when he realizes that Anzu is doing what Satoru told her to do earlier. Ren takes the cord out of her hand, and she lets out a cry. He’s going to complain about her, but he loves her.
“She’ll grow on you.” Satoru says, standing up to grab his walking baby and get out of Ren’s hair. Ren doesn’t like the baby but he certainly loves her. “But come downstairs, Ren. We’re celebrating your mommy’s achievement. She was talking about hanging up her diploma next to your kindergarten diploma.”
“Can you tell them I don’t want to talk about Anzu?” Ren asks, and Satoru hums in response. Satoru extends his hand for Ren to take, and the child takes it without an issue before both head back downstairs to spend time with you.
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“What are you doing here?” Satoru approaches you as you sit on the ground outside, in his mother’s garden. You’re hiding from everyone. After hours of talking to people inside, you need a break from the small group.
“Need a minute.” You answer, and Satoru decides to sit down next to you. The kids are fine with their grandmothers, he can take a moment alone with you and properly congratulate you. He throws his arm over your shoulder and brings you close to him. “We should’ve just gone out to eat at a restaurant and called it a day. I don’t have the energy to be so social.”
“I got you a trip to Bora Bora. You just have to power through these last couple of hours… We can get Anzu to throw a fit and make it a few minutes.” He responds and you chuckle. You rest your head on his shoulder and shut your eyes for a moment. Being social shouldn’t be so draining.
“Can we leave the kids with granny?” You ask him, and he hums in response. He had no plans on taking them; he loves them, but they sure know how to ruin a vacation. 
Your gaze falls on his face, looking into the blue eyes you fell in love with so long ago. Even though it was an eternity ago, he still makes your heart skip a beat. He doesn’t let you stare for too long before he steals a kiss from you.
“If you stare for too long you might find me ugly.” Satoru tells you and you roll your eyes. If you don’t find him ugly first thing in the morning then you’re definitely not finding him ugly now.
“Are you saying that because–” You begin but the man cuts you off before you can finish your question. He knows you, he knows that you’ll start a petty fight with a dumb question.
“Because I love you so much, and I think I’m not good enough for you– I know I’m not good enough for you, you’re perfect.” Satoru responds, making you grin from ear to ear. He isn’t exactly wrong, he’s lucky that you considered getting back together with him at all.
“I love you too even though you’re…” You bite your tongue before you insult him. He raises a brow and before he can question anything, your lips land on his. His cheeks begin to turn pink when you peck his lips over and over again, feeling like a teenager all over again.
You stare into his eyes when you stop, watching the sparkle in them as he looks back at you. He’s utterly in love with you, and the feeling only gets more intense as time passes. He caresses your face with the back of his hand ever so lovingly. You get lost in his loving eyes until your eyes shift to the flowers behind him.
“Oh my–” You gasp, your eyes widening as you realize. “This is where you used to pick flowers for me?”
“Oh, yeah.” Satoru laughs, turning to pick a lily for you. It’s been years since he’s been in this place. Maybe he should come here more often. “A flower for my flower.”
“Cheesy.” You take it from his hands, wanting to roll your eyes because of his comment– But your face is getting hot. Even when he’s cheesy your heart threatens to beat out of your chest.
“Yeah, cheesy is what got me two kids.” He retorts. “Isn’t that right, Mrs. Gojo?”
“Calling me Mrs. Gojo is going to make you single.” You warn him, and he fights back on laughing. “Don’t make me divorce you before getting married.”
“What? Are you going to Suguru for a rebound again?” Satoru questions, making you glare at him. Maybe he should just listen and agree, not everything needs a response from him. “I’m just joking, baby. He has a girlfriend now and whatnot.”
“You better stick to your day job, you have no future as a comedian.” You say, standing up from the ground to go back inside, and of course, Satoru follows like a lost puppy. He’s simply lost without you.
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You love spending time with your kids, you love them more than anything– But you’re not going to pass up on the opportunity of a sleepover. Having them off your hands for the night is a blessing sometimes. You simply want to celebrate with your fiancé in a way that your kids make difficult.
“I’ll run you a bath.” Satoru tells you, running to go upstairs to get to the bathroom before you. Running you a bath that he’ll end up joining, that’s not too bad. It’s a nice way to end the night, that you know for sure.
You give him a moment to set everything up, pulling out your phone to answer a couple of messages of people congratulating you for finishing your degree. What’s next? You’re not too sure. But whatever you decide it’s fine. You have Satoru and your kids by your side no matter what. The money also helps.
Right now, you know you want to relax in a bathtub full of bubbles. Maybe have Satoru right next to you. You’ve been looking into the future for the past ten years, for once you just want to sit back and appreciate the moment. 
“Are you coming?!” You hear Satoru as you walk up the stairs. He’s so impatient, he can’t even wait a minute. You won’t hurry up to please him, as a matter of fact, you walk slower. Satoru is tapping his foot on the floor when you finally get to the bedroom.
“Finally.” He says, walking over to you to zip down the zipper that holds your dress together. He’s desperate to get you naked. You’re chuckling, reminding him,
“No need for you to be in a rush, we have all night.” But it goes in one ear and out the other. Before you know it, he turns you around, his lips landing on yours. His kiss is full of desire, needing to feel your every touch on his skin. He’s burning up to feel you.
“Fuck, I want you so fucking bad.” He pulls away from the kiss as the dress drops to the ground. He picks you up from the floor and puts you down on the bed, smirking at the black lingerie that will soon be removed. “So perfect for me, love.”
“Fuck me, Satoru.” You tell him, voice seductive that can get him to drop to his knees in an instant. The bath that’s filled up and with bubbles is long forgotten by both of you. He takes off his shirt and pants, leaving his briefs. Your eyes stare at the tent that makes him ever so uncomfortable. You sit up on the bed, your fingers going directly to the erection.
Your index finger goes underneath the band of his underwear, eyes looking up at him as you pull his briefs down. Your eyes quickly avert to his cock, wrapping around the base of it. You slowly move your hand from base to tip as pre-cum leaks from the tip. Your tongue licks it up, circling around it as the man bites down on his lip.
Your mouth wraps around all it can take, bobbing your head slowly. You take what your mouth can handle. He can’t complain because it’s just perfect. Everything you do in Satoru’s eyes is perfect. The pace is slow, but it gradually gets faster. 
You look up at him to find him biting his lip, his eyes shut. You take his cock out of your mouth, and begin to run your hand up and down his shaft, your saliva serving as a lubricant. He finally opens his eyes to look down at you, but his teeth remain on his bottom lip.
“I want to hear you.” You say, a rather demanding tone in your voice. He stops biting down on his lip, and your hand continues to jerk him off for a couple of seconds before your mouth wraps around his cock again.
He’s groaning at your every move, which is like music to your ears. You look up at him to find him looking back down at you. He knows you’re more than satisfied with him, with how he sounds. It’s nice to be as loud as he wants to be, without worrying about someone barging in.
You try to take his whole length in your mouth, making you gag. Tears quickly form in your eyes as you remove your mouth from his cock, and try again. He throws his head back, breathy moans escaping his lips at your every move. 
You take your mouth off his cock and begin to jerk him off. Your mouth goes to his balls and you begin to suck on them. Satoru got louder and louder by the second, his release approaching. 
Your mouth goes back to his cock while your hands begin to play with his balls. It doesn’t take too long for his cum to hit the back of your throat. Your mouth remains on his cock for a couple of seconds before pulling away. You make sure to swallow all the cum, sticking your tongue out for him to see and proudly admire.
“My good girl.” He praises you. He reaches behind to unhook your bra and slide it off you. Once it’s off, he desperately tries to take off your panties. It’s unexpected when he gets on the bed and lays down. You crawl to where he is, positioning yourself on top of him. You get ready to ride him, but it takes you by surprise when your fiancé says, “Sit on my face.”
“Are you sure?” You ask, though it’s not unusual from Satoru.
“Just come here and sit.” He responds. You do what he wants, but you are hesitant to fully sit down. He’s the one who pushes you down onto him. His tongue is quick to wander around your cunt.
His tongue begins to flick your clit over and over again, making low moans leave your lips. His arms go over your thighs, pushing you down further. You’d be worried about him breathing, if you weren’t too focused on how his tongue moves around your pussy.
“Toru!” You moan. Your moans serve as encouragement, and are a sweet reward for the man, moving his tongue faster. His tongue stops flicking your clit, and moves down to your hole. He teases you, threatening to enter but never really doing it. 
“Baby please.” You beg. His tongue finally enters your cunt. You shut your eyes, getting lost in the feeling. But out of the two of you, Satoru is enjoying it more. He finally takes his tongue out and goes back to your clit. 
He begins to suck on your clit, and you swear you see stars as your orgasm builds up. Your hips raise a bit, but he pushes you back down. You get louder and louder. “I’m gonna- fuck- gonna cum-”
You moan loudly as you reach your climax, his tongue still working wonders. A minute later he stops, and you get off him, sitting down on his torso. He raises himself a bit, not completely to sit up but enough to wrap his hand around your throat and pull you into a lewd kiss.
“Should we continue in the bath?” Satoru asks when he pulls away and you can’t nod your head more frantically. You get off the bed and practically run to the bath. Satoru gets in the bathtub first, and you follow behind.
“You’re so lucky.” You point out as your back presses against his chest. He’s never doubted it. He peppers your neck with kisses, while you align his cock with your entrance. You lower yourself on his cock.
“How about another baby?” Satoru asks, making you click your tongue while you begin to move.
“Leave me alone” You reply, and he wants to chuckle but he’s biting down his lip as he feels your pussy wrap around him. He loves your mouth but it can’t compare to this. 
He’s kissing your back, showing you how much he loves you in every possible way as you move up and down his cock. His hand moves down to play with your clit, making you shut your eyes. Every little touch is enough to make you insane lately and Satoru loves to touch you.
“You’re so perfect around me, baby.” Satoru whispers into your ear before nibbling on your earlobe. 
You’re softly moaning his name, your walls tightening around him. You’re so close to finishing. You’ve been so touch deprived lately since your schedules make spending time with each other impossible– Maybe now you’ll have more time to spend with each other.
“Fuck–” You curse as you finish on his cock. You hold to the edge of the bathtub as Satoru continues to move in and out of you. 
He’s not going to last long. It’s too hard for him to contain himself when he’s inside of you. He comes to a complete stop when he finally reaches his release, finishing inside of you. He remains buried inside of you as you pant to catch your breaths, but after a minute you lift yourself and take his cock out of you.
“What do you want to do tomorrow?” Satoru asks, hands caressing your arms as your head goes to his chest.
“Just sleep.” You answer as Satoru kisses the top of your head. He squeezes your hand before bringing it up to his lips to press a subtle kiss on it. “I need to get some rest.”
“Sleep sounds nice.” Satoru responds. You’re getting comfortable in the bathtub as your eyes begin to get heavy. You’re tired. Satoru notices and he splashes you, “Don’t fall asleep in the bathtub, love.”
“Just carry me to the bed.” You reply, making him roll his eyes playfully. He can, but if you don’t drag him out he’ll stay in the water and get all pruny. He’s warm by your side, too comfortable to leave. This is the reality he wanted ten years ago, and he finally has it. He’s not leaving this comfort no matter what gets in the way.
You’ll be the one to get up first and drag him out, that’s how it usually is in the morning. But you’re falling asleep. He doesn’t want to disturb you either. So he’ll just stay in the bathtub. 
“Don’t let me get all pruny, Satoru. Carry me out.” You warn him, and he hums in response. He’ll have to eventually because you’ll end up killing him if you wake up in ten hours, and you’re still in the bathroom.
“You know Ren is going to call later to say goodnight?” He points out, but you don’t care to talk about it. You’re sleepy. He kisses the top of your head when he’s met with silence. He mutters softly to not disturb your peace, 
“I love you. Goodnight, baby.”
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deans-queen · 2 days
Text
You Belong With Me (Dean’s Version)
Pairing: Dean Winchester x You
Summary: POV - Dean sees you walking down the street with your new boyfriend and doesn’t like what he sees 🥺 ( this was a request that I was tagged in by @jackles010378 )
Warnings: language, spicy moments, jealousy , angst, possessiveness, emotional vulnerability, mentions of toxic relationship.
Pre Authors Note: BTW I needed to use this gif because it just does something to me like 🥵😩😭 I’m so down bad for this man it’s ridiculous — anyways happy reading!! 🫶🏻
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Dean’s POV
I leaned against the Impala, arms crossed, sunglasses low on my nose as I watched you walk down the street, hand in hand with him. Some preppy guy, clean-shaven, all smiles, like he didn’t have a care in the world. My gut twisted the second I saw you laughing at something he said.
Damn, that laugh. That smile. It used to be mine.
You looked happy, but I knew better. There was something off, something I couldn’t put my finger on, and it gnawed at me. He wasn’t right for you, not by a long shot. Maybe it was the way he touched you—too casual, too cocky—or the fact that he didn’t even notice when your smile faltered.
I took a long drag from my beer, eyes still locked on you. When you passed by, our gazes met. Yours lingered on me for just a second too long before you quickly looked away. Yeah, you felt it too. That pull. That spark that had never really gone away, no matter how much you tried to hide it.
A week later, I saw you again, sitting on a park bench, alone this time. The sky was overcast, like it was about to rain, but you didn’t seem to care. I noticed the way your shoulders shook, the soft sobs you tried to stifle. My chest tightened, and I couldn’t stand it.
I slid onto the bench next to you, silent for a moment before speaking. “Hey.”
You looked up, your tear-streaked face breaking me. “Dean…”
“Where’s he?” I asked, not even bothering to hide the bitterness in my voice.
You shook your head, wiping your cheeks. “We broke up.”
My heart surged with something I didn’t want to name, but my fists clenched as you kept talking.
“He was an asshole. Treated me like… like I didn’t even matter half the time.” Your voice cracked, and I could see how much it hurt to admit that. “I should’ve known.”
“I knew,” I muttered before I could stop myself.
Your head snapped up, eyes widening. “What?”
I sighed, running a hand through my hair. “I could tell. The way he looked at you, the way he acted… He didn’t deserve you.”
You blinked, processing my words, and then something shifted. There was this tension hanging between us, thick and electric, the kind you couldn’t ignore. I reached out, cupping your cheek gently, my thumb brushing away a tear.
“I would never treat you like that,” I said, my voice rougher than I intended. “You know that, right?”
Your breath hitched, eyes locking onto mine, and for a moment, the whole world fell away. It was just us—just you and me—and the way your lips parted, your gaze flicking down to my mouth, told me everything I needed to know.
I leaned in slowly, giving you a chance to pull away. But you didn’t. Instead, you met me halfway, your lips soft, warm, and perfect against mine. The second we kissed, everything else vanished. All the frustration, the jealousy, the anger—I poured it all into that kiss, into the way I pulled you closer, needing to feel you against me.
You whimpered into my mouth, fingers threading through my hair, and God, that sound—made me lose it. My hand slid to the back of your neck, deepening the kiss, and when you pressed your body into mine, I could barely keep it together.
I pulled back slightly, resting my forehead against yours, breath heavy. “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted this.”
Your lips curved into a shaky smile, but there was still that uncertainty in your eyes. “Dean… I don’t want to just be a rebound.”
I shook my head. “You think this is a rebound? Babe, I’ve been wanting you for years. This… this is way past that.”
You bit your lip, that little hint of doubt fading as I kissed you again, harder this time. You moaned softly, and I couldn’t help myself.
“You deserve better,” I growled against your lips, my hands roaming your sides. “You deserve someone who’ll treat you like the goddamn queen you are.”
Your breath was ragged, fingers clutching at my jacket as I nipped at your lower lip. “And you think that’s you?”
“I know it’s me.” My voice was dark, low, the kind that made your whole body shudder. “You belong with me, sweetheart. No one else is gonna give you what you need.”
You let out a shaky breath, eyes heavy-lidded as you stared at me. “Show me.”
And hell, did I ever.
A few days had passed since that kiss, but it was all I could think about. You had to know you were driving me crazy—every time we crossed paths, there was that look in your eyes, like you wanted more but weren’t sure if you should ask for it.
I was about to give you more than you ever expected.
We met again that night, under the same damn streetlight where I first saw you with him. Only this time, it was just us, no distractions.
“You look like you’ve got something to say,” you teased, leaning back against the hood of the Impala, your eyes gleaming under the dim light.
I took a step closer, then another, until I was right in front of you, crowding your space. “I do.”
Your breath hitched, but you didn’t move, didn’t back down. “Yeah? What’s that?”
I ran a finger down your arm, watching the way your skin prickled beneath my touch. “That I’m done pretending. I want you, Y/N. I’ve wanted you for a long damn time.”
Your lips parted, but before you could say anything, I grabbed your waist and pulled you flush against me. The kiss that followed wasn’t soft like the first one—it was hard, desperate, and filled with everything I’d been holding back for too damn long.
You gasped into my mouth as my hands roamed over your body, gripping your hips, your waist, everything I could reach. You melted against me, your fingers curling into my shirt as I deepened the kiss, my teeth grazing your lower lip before I tugged it, just hard enough to make you whimper.
“Dean,” you whispered, breathless, and that was all it took for me to lose control. I lifted you onto the hood of the Impala, pushing between your thighs as you wrapped your legs around me, pulling me closer.
“Damn, sweetheart,” I growled against your neck, trailing rough kisses along your skin. “You have no idea what you do to me.”
You tilted your head back, giving me more access as I pressed open-mouthed kisses along your throat. “Then show me, Dean. I’m yours.”
And I did. Every single inch of you. Every kiss, every touch, every moan—it all belonged to me now.
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Author’s Note
Hope you enjoyed this story! Thank you @jackles010378 for this suggestion, I def loved writing it! Feel free to let me know what you think! I always love reading feedback!
Like & follow for more !! Xoxo
Want to read more? Check out my other stories!
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If you would like to be added on my Taglist for stories please send me a message or comment on this post
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blackenedsnow · 3 days
Note
I love ur writing so much could I maybe request p1 slowly learning to love and be loved 💔
p1 dude learning to love and be loved ; headcanons
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WARNING: Emotional detachment, slow emotional healing, and mental health struggles.
PAIRING: Postal (1) Dude x Reader
NOTE: Thank you so much for your kind words! This is sooo sweet and I had so much fun writing this.
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At the beginning, Dude is incredibly distant.
He’s been hardened by everything going on in his head, unable to trust anyone, and it takes time before he even acknowledges your presence as something more than just another person in his life.
He avoids eye contact, rarely speaks, and his body language is closed off.
He flinches at touch, even a casual hand on his shoulder can cause him to stiffen.
He’s not used to physical affection and struggles with it, associating touch with pain or vulnerability.
You notice this and take things slow, giving him space while offering gentle reassurances that you’re there for him.
The first step to breaking through his walls happens in small ways.
You notice that he tends to neglect himself—skipping meals, isolating for days, or losing himself in his own thoughts.
You leave food for him, make sure he has a clean place to rest, or leave a blanket for him when it gets cold.
Even though he has that coat on all the time.
He doesn’t thank you at first, but you notice him slowly accepting these gestures, even if he doesn’t show it outwardly.
There are rare moments when you catch a glimpse of his vulnerability.
Maybe it’s late at night when the weight of the paranoia becomes too much, and you find him staring out into the darkness, lost in thought.
You sit next to him, offering silent company.
He doesn’t say anything, but the fact that he doesn’t push you away is progress.
Trust comes slowly for him.
The first time he starts opening up to you, it’s not in the form of deep conversation but in subtle actions—he lets you sit closer to him, or he allows himself to relax slightly in your presence.
It’s a process of him realizing that not everyone wants to hurt him, and you’re someone who’s there to help, not judge.
Dude doesn’t know how to love anymore, not in the traditional sense.
But with time, he starts showing his affection in his own way—he might fix something for you, stand by your side, or give you something meaningful to him, even if it’s small.
He’s not one for grand romantic gestures, but his love is shown in quieter ways.
If you’re having a tough day, he’ll sit beside you in silence, offering his presence rather than words.
His touch remains tentative, but over time, you notice him reaching out—a hand on yours, or resting his head on your shoulder when he feels safe enough to do so.
His biggest fear is losing the one person who has stayed by his side.
The thought terrifies him because he knows how fleeting happiness can be.
When you notice him getting more protective, it’s not out of possessiveness but fear.
He doesn’t know how to express it, but the idea of losing you is unbearable to him.
It takes time for Dude to fully accept that he deserves love.
Even after he begins to care for you, there’s still a lingering doubt in his mind—why would anyone want to be with someone like him?
But as you continue to show him patience, understanding, and unconditional support, he starts to believe that maybe, just maybe, he’s worthy of love after all.
There’s a moment when the emotional walls he’s built start to crack.
Maybe it’s after a particularly difficult day, or when his fear catches up to him, but he finally lets his guard down in front of you.
He doesn’t say much, but he leans into your embrace, allowing himself to be vulnerable, if only for a moment.
It’s then that he realizes just how much he needs you.
Slowly but surely, Dude learns that love isn’t about perfection or being strong all the time.
It’s about support, about being there for one another, and allowing someone to care for you, even when you don’t feel like you deserve it.
You’re the person who teaches him that love can be a healing force, and while it’s not a magic fix, it’s a step towards a brighter future.
Dude may never be the most emotionally expressive person, but he’s learned how to love and be loved.
He starts to accept that it’s okay to rely on someone else, and while he may never fully leave behind his paranoia, with you by his side, he begins to find peace in the idea that love doesn’t have to hurt.
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oswildin · 2 days
Text
Debated making this, but oh well, here we are…
I rewatched the Loki series.
Going to add here quickly that I have been a fan of Loki since 2012/2013, and I personally relate to his character for a multitude of reasons.
Now, I enjoy the series, but I wish they made it more character focused than they had. I do feel like they prioritised story in terms of making it fit the next phase over exploring and expanding on Loki’s character to some degree (a lot of it was surface level).
For example, I would’ve loved to have seen:
Exploring Loki’s Jotun heritage, even if it was a variant of him in the void that embraced it, dropped his aesir form, a conversation between Loki and his Jotun variant as they explain why they chose to embrace it, giving a different view to maybe how our Loki sees himself/the Jotuns. If ‘What If’ could have a frost giant Loki variant, why couldn’t the show?
Expanding upon what happened to Loki during that year after his fall from the Bifrost. The reason for this is self explanatory really, it would add more lore/depth to his experiences/actions during the Avengers. Maybe address the trauma he has from it.
Loki fighting with his so-called ‘desire’ for a throne more. By this I mean, I felt he flipped pretty quickly from his plan to overthrow the time keepers to just following along with Sylvie - which is fine, but I kinda thought there would be more push back from him. I get it was a life or death situation and Loki’s whole thing is ‘survival’, but it would’ve added to their dynamic and the fact the writers clearly wanted to push how Sylvie was different to other Loki’s.
Exploring Sylvie’s backstory more. It really did feel like it was an afterthought, which is a shame. I suppose they left it ambiguous for certain reasons, but I think they should’ve had more flashback scenes of what Sylvie could remember. I think it would’ve helped people understand and relate to her more. (I do love her though).
Actually showed Loki’s gender fluidity & shapeshifting ability more. Again, self explanatory really & important to his character, plus the whole implied only ‘woman variant’ thing with Sylvie should’ve not been a thing, like at all.
They should’ve given Loki more time to process everything. This show really should’ve had 8 episodes each season, I get that’s not the writers fault, likely Disney/marvel’s doing. Perhaps then the shift in his character wouldn’t have felt so jarring, especially considering he’s 2012 Loki. I do agree they wrote him as if he was Ragnarok!Loki, and that’s not necessarily a bad thing, but it just felt jarring considering the last we saw of this Loki was Avengers. But then I could also argue that maybe he thought ‘what’s the point of it’ because the TVA know everything about him, but I digress.
Used Sylvie more in S2. It did feel like they didn’t quite know what to do with her, her and Loki clearly just needed to sit and discuss the citadel fight, but the closest thing we got is in EP3 where Sylvie says ‘this is all rather familiar, isn’t it?’, referencing their different/opposing opinions on the TVA/He Who Remains. And also maybe the pie room scene, but it’s very vague/not directly addressed.
Explored the fact that Mobius is not a good guy more. Because, he isn’t. And that’s okay. To me, the whole point of the show is based on Loki’s quote of ‘no one good is ever truly good, and no one bad is ever truly bad’, and whilst they do reference Mobius’ own morally grey actions/traits, they don’t particularly make it clear and most just see him as this ‘happy go lucky old man who likes pie and loves Loki variants’. In fact, I actually really liked the scene where Sylvie confronts him - which is a very unpopular opinion to have it seems, lol.
Delved into the psychology of Loki further than surface level/what we already know about him. Yes, we know he’s the God of Mischief. Yes, we know he isn’t evil. Yes, we know he is redeemable. Yes, we know he’s cunning, manipulative and selfish. We get that he projects this ‘illusion’ of himself, but it was only really mentioned in S1 EP1, maybe slightly EP2, before it’s never really mentioned again. I suppose S2 does this to a degree with the bar scene and EP5 of S1 in the time cell with Sif - also I think they tried to take the narcissist angle from the pov that it’s because of his low self-esteem as to why he needs validation and it’s a defence mechanism, but they didn’t particularly make that clear and made it seem like he just thinks highly of himself.
I know it seems like I have a lot of issues with the show, and I do, but I still enjoyed it. It’s okay to be critical of a piece of media and still enjoy it.
I do prefer S2 to S1, mostly because I prefer the direction they took it in and whilst I, of course, wanted better for Loki, I can’t deny S2 EP6 is a stunning finale. I sobbed so hard during the ending and still feel the grief that I actually lost someone I knew personally. But I also have hope that this means Loki is now a main player in the next phase (am I delusional? Maybe).
I enjoyed the dynamics, the back and forth/chemistry, the story was interesting, the set & costume design, the acting, the directing/colour grading, the music (Natalie Holt, you are genius), the emotions, the fun, the characters…
So this is not a hate post by any means, I will once again state, I enjoyed the show. But, I do have issues with it, and that’s okay too.
Please, dni if you’re just going to be argumentative or confrontational. I also don’t want to hear that just because I enjoyed the show that I’m ‘not a real fan’ lmao. I’m sorry, but I’ve been a Loki stan for over a decade, and I will not have someone tell me I’m not a real fan because of a piece of fictional media. Also, please do not mention anything regarding ships on this post, I do not care for it because it always ends up in arguments and I am a multishipper so I don’t tend to fight for any side. Thank you! :) /gen
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Text
| Reunions and Rivalries |
tetsuro kuroo x f!reader
The first time Kuroo saw you was when he noticed you sitting with Kenma, happily playing video games together. He would have been lying if he said he wasn’t surprised when Kenma mentioned he had made a friend on the first day of the new school year. He didn’t share much about you, but Kuroo knew you had just transferred to Nekoma High and somehow you had piqued his interest.
warnings/notes: highschool romance, fluff, slight angst, I do NOT write fanfictions or storys normally, this is a first, so I am generally sorry for everything. CRINGE. def will be cringe in some parts. I'm a big sucker for Kuroo, him and Kenma may be ooc but I don't care this is my silly story and I just need to get it out of my head so I can finally write my Master's Thesis in peace. Also, english is not my first language. This has been "proofread" by my friends (who are also non-native speakers, enjoy).
word count: 2659
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The familiar sound of Karasuno players shouting to each other filled the air as the Tokyo team approached. You walked next to Yaku, chatting casually, when suddenly two familiar figures came sprinting toward you.
“Y/N!” Nishinoya shouted at the top of his lungs, while Sugawara waved enthusiastically from behind him. Before you could even react, Noya wrapped you in a tight hug, nearly knocking poor Yaku off his feet in the process.
“Noya! Suga-Chaaaan~!” you grinned, pulling Sugawara into the hug as well. Noya, now gripping your arm dramatically, suddenly shifted his expression to one of exaggerated misery.
“Y/N!” he whined, pushing you away just enough to meet your eyes, still holding onto your arm. “You have no idea how terrible school is without you. It’s been torture!”
You laughed, playfully pushing at Noya’s shoulder. "Oh, come on, Noya. It can't be that bad."
"It is that bad!" he insisted, throwing his head back in exaggerated despair. "Ever since you transferred, it's like the life has been sucked out of our classroom. I can't even focus on anything anymore!"
Sugawara chuckled, shaking his head at Noya's antics. "I think you just miss having someone to cheat off of during tests."
Noya pouted, clutching his heart as if he’d been gravely wounded. "How could you say that?! I would never cheat! I just… I mean, maybe I miss having Y/N to help me out once in a while, but that's totally different!"
You smirked, crossing your arms. "Uh-huh, totally."
Nishinoya groaned, burying his face in his hands. "You don’t understand! It’s like no one else gets me. The energy in class is so dull now, Y/N! I'm completely doomed."
You rolled your eyes affectionately, patting Noya on the head. "You’re being a bit dramatic, don’t you think?"
"Not dramatic enough!" Noya cried, throwing his arms wide for emphasis. "It's been painful without you. Seriously, how do you survive at that new school? Do they at least let you sleep through class?"
You chuckled. "It’s not so bad, actually. I’ve made some new friends, and I still get plenty of sleep."
Noya looked betrayed, his eyes wide. "New friends? What, and you didn’t miss us at all?"
"Of course I missed you guys!" You reassured, smiling. "But you know, life moves on. Besides, we still get to play Guild Wars together."
„Yeah, nice raid yesterday,” Nishinoya exclaimed, fist bumping you.
Kuroo, watching the scene from a few steps away, furrowed his brow slightly. “So, she's close with the volleyball team at her old school too?” he asked casually, glancing over at Kenma.
“Hm?” Kenma blinked, only half-listening. “Obviously,” he said with a shrug. “Why? You jealous or something?”
Kuroo scoffed, his expression tightening for a moment. “What? No,” he replied, though his gaze drifted back to you, now laughing a bit too hard—at least from his perspective—at something Sugawara said. His jaw clenched involuntarily.
“You sure?” Kenma muttered, still not looking up. “Because it kind of seems like you are.”
“I’m not,” Kuroo grumbled, crossing his arms defensively. “Why would I be—”
His words trailed off as Daichi approached you, a calm but warm smile on his face. He greeted you with a firm hug, his arms wrapping around you in a way that spoke of years of friendship. “It’s been too long, Y/N,” Daichi said, his voice soft. “It’s a nice surprise you’re here.”
You smiled, your face lighting up. “It feels like ages.”
Kuroo watched the exchange, feeling his heart sink just a bit. Daichi’s hug wasn’t overly affectionate, but there was a sense of familiarity between you two that stirred envy in him. He tried to brush it off, forcing a smile, though it felt stiff on his face.
“The third years used to be in the same class as her brother since Kindergarten,” Kenma said quietly, as if reading Kuroo’s thoughts. “They’ve known each other for a long time.”
Kuroo exhaled, rolling his eyes, though the slight tension in his shoulders didn’t ease. “Great. Old friends,” he muttered, his smile feeling more and more strained.
Kenma smirked. “You’re terrible at hiding your feelings.”
"Wait… she has a brother?" Kuroo asked, his tone sharper than he intended.
Kenma gave him a surprised look. "You didn’t know? Yeah, L/N Ryouta—he goes to Nekoma too."
Kuroo’s mind raced. "L/N Ryouta? I don’t think I’ve met him."
Kenma shook his head. "Probably not. You’re in the university prep class, and he’s in regular courses. Still, kind of strange she didn’t mention him during one of your study dates."
Kuroo’s lips tugged into a slight frown. "We’re studying, not chatting." The fact that you had a brother he didn’t know about made him feel a little out of the loop. He didn’t like it.
Kenma shrugged. "It makes sense she'd be close with them. They’ve been hanging out since she was little."
Kuroo watched you laugh with Daichi and Sugawara, Noya had left you to help Tanaka “protect” Shimizu. You clearly had a lot of history with these guys. The way they greeted you, how easily you fit into their circle—it was obvious you were used to attention from boys. It bothered him more than he cared to admit.
Just as he was about to look away, you caught his eye and waved, your smile brightening. For a split second, you seemed to hesitate, a faint blush coloring your cheeks as if you hadn’t expected him to be watching. Kuroo smirked, feeling a little more at ease now.
Daichi, noticing your reaction, raised an eyebrow. "Who's that?" he asked, his tone casual but curious.
You turned back to Daichi, still smiling. "Oh, that’s Kuroo, Nekoma’s captain. You should probably go introduce yourself."
Daichi nodded, though his expression became a little more guarded. "Right. I’ll go say hi."
As Daichi walked over, Kuroo straightened up, masking his emotions behind his usual confident grin. Daichi extended his hand, his smile polite but strained. "Daichi Sawamura, captain of Karasuno."
Kuroo grasped Daichi’s hand, matching his too-firm grip with one of his own. "Tetsurou Kuroo. Captain of Nekoma."
Both captains forced smiles, but in the back of their minds, they had the same thought: I don’t like this guy.
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“So… you’re not their manager?” Sugawara asked, giving you a playful nudge as he leaned against the wall next to you in the gym, a soft smile playing on his lips.
“Nope,” you chuckled. "I’m just here for moral support.”
Sugawara laughed. “Then I can support you supporting. We've got a cracking new setter, so I'll probably be on the bench the whole time.”
There was an ease between you and Sugawara that came with familiarity. You caught up on everything—school, mutual friends, and volleyball, of course. Time slipped away as the two of you talked, oblivious to anything else happening on the court.
Except someone was paying attention.
From across the gym, Kuroo’s gaze flickered toward you more than once. He tried to brush it off, but the more you laughed with Sugawara, the harder it was to ignore the twist in his chest.
“Oi, Kuro,” Kenma muttered, not even looking at him as he noticed the subtle tension radiating off his captain. “What’s up with you?”
Kuroo blinked, dragging his gaze back to the court just in time to see one of Karasuno's players miss a spike. “What do you mean? Nothing's up.”
Kenma sighed. “You’ve been staring over there for the last ten minutes. You’re distracted.”
“Distracted?” Kuroo scoffed, though his eyes flicked once again in your direction—watching as Sugawara leaned in to say something that made you laugh. Why does he get to make you laugh like that? Kuroo felt his jaw tighten. “I’m not distracted. Just… keeping an eye on the competition. You know, strategy.”
Kenma raised an eyebrow. “Sugawara isn’t even playing.”
Kuroo rolled his eyes, “You mean Suga-Chaaan~,” he mocked your greeting only to feign indifference afterwards. “I’m not watching him. Why would I care about some third year who isn’t even in starting lineup?”
Kenma looked at him blankly for a moment before shrugging. “I don’t know. Why would you care?”
“I don’t,” Kuroo huffed. “As I already said, it’s not like I’m jealous or anything.���
Kenma eyes flicked toward Sugawara, then back to Kuroo. “I didn’t say you were.”
“I’m not,” Kuroo added, a little too quickly. “I mean—”
“Kuro,” Kenma interrupted, his deadpan expression growing sharper.
“I—" Kuroo hesitated, suddenly aware of how ridiculous he sounded. “I’m just looking out for her.”
Kenma’s lips twitched into the slightest hint of a smirk. “Sure.”
Across the court, Sugawara was finishing a story, his eyes twinkling as he spoke. You laughed, leaning in a little closer. Kuroo’s eye twitched.
“It’s not like they’re flirting,” Kuroo mumbled under his breath, though his voice lacked conviction.
“What was that?” Kenma asked, not bothering to look away from the ball on their side.
“Nothing!” Kuroo snapped, a little too loud, drawing some curious glances from nearby players.
You and Sugawara, still chatting, were blissfully unaware of Kuroo’s growing frustration. Every time Sugawara made you laugh, it felt like a small jab, not because he disliked Sugawara, but because… well, he wasn’t entirely sure why. Or at least, he wasn’t willing to admit it yet.
The match was in full swing, as Shimizu joined you and Sugawara at the side, observing as the teams went back and forth on the court. You’d fallen into an easy rhythm with Sugawara, catching up and making jokes, but now that Shimizu had joined you, the conversation was a bit more reserved.
After a moment of comfortable silence, Shimizu turned toward you. “You’re not their manager, yet you’re wearing their jersey,” she remarked softly, her eyes following the ball.
“Yeah, it actually belongs to Kenma, we're about the same size, thought it would boost the team spirit” you replied, smiling fondly.
Shimizu nodded thoughtfully, glancing between you and Kenma on the court. “He seems to enjoy your company.”
You blinked, catching the subtle implication in her tone. “Wait, do you mean…?” You hesitated, feeling a slight blush creep up your neck. “You think I like Kenma?”
Sugawara, who had been listening in with a bemused expression, chuckled under his breath. “Oh no, Shimizu,” he said, shaking his head, “you’re way off.”
Shimizu tilted her head slightly, giving Sugawara a questioning look. “Really? I thought—”
Sugawara waved her off with a smile, clearly amused. “Trust me, I’ve known Y/N for a long time. She doesn’t go for the quiet, brooding type.”
You narrowed your eyes at Sugawara, half-embarrassed. “Hey, I can like quiet guys,” you defended, though it came out more as a weak protest than anything else.
Sugawara gave you a teasing smirk. “Maybe, but not that quiet.” He leaned in a little closer, lowering his voice conspiratorially. “Kenma’s great and all, but your type’s always been more… I don’t know, bad boy. The kind of guy who’s a little rough around the edges, gets under your skin.”
Shimizu blinked, her curiosity piqued. “Bad boy…?” she repeated thoughtfully, then her gaze drifted toward the court where Coach Ukai stood, arms crossed, observing the match with his intense focus. She nodded in his direction. “Ah. You mean someone like Ukai?”
You nearly choked, waving your hands in protest. “What? No way! He’s… hot, sure, but he’s way too old!”
Sugawara burst out laughing, and even Shimizu’s usually calm expression cracked into a smile.
“Nah, I wasn’t talking about Ukai,” Sugawara chuckled, nudging you playfully. “I had someone more… age-appropriate in mind.” He pointed subtly across the court to where Kuroo was setting up for a block, his sharp gaze focused on the game, his usual smug grin tugging at the corners of his lips. “I was thinking more along the lines of that bad boy.”
You froze, suddenly feeling like all the air had been knocked out of your lungs. “Kuroo?” You hadn’t even realized it, but the moment Sugawara mentioned it, something clicked inside you—like a light had been switched on.
Sugawara’s grin widened as he saw the realization dawning on your face. “There it is,” he said, his voice smug but not unkind. “Ryouta told me you just can’t shut up about him.”
You could feel the blush deepening, the heat spreading up to your cheeks. “I… I don’t…” you stammered, not quite sure how to deny it now that it was out in the open.
Shimizu watched you carefully, her quiet gaze perceptive. “So, it is Kuroo?” she asked softly, her voice neutral as ever, though there was a trace of curiosity.
You glanced at her, feeling a little trapped but knowing you couldn’t lie, especially not with Sugawara there, reading you like an open book. You sighed, defeated, and ran a hand through your hair. “Okay, fine,” you muttered, embarrassed but kind of relieved to admit it. “Yeah… I think I like Kuroo.”
Sugawara looked like he’d just won a game. “I knew it,” he said triumphantly. “I could tell from the beginning.”
Shimizu gave a small nod, her expression thoughtful. “He does seem like someone you’d get along with,” she said quietly.
“Well…” you began slowly, a shy smile creeping onto your face, “he is pretty great. He’s been really nice to me, even when he’s annoying.”
Shimizu gave you a small, knowing smile.
Sugawara’s grin softened a bit, turning more genuine. “Sounds like you’re smitten.”
You shot him a playful glare. “Don’t make it sound so cheesy.”
He chuckled. “Hey, no judgment here. I’m just glad you finally realized it.”
You groaned, half embarrassed but secretly hopeful. “Great, now I’m going to be overanalyzing everything he says to me.”
Sugawara laughed, clapping you on the shoulder. “That’s part of the fun. Just keep me updated.”
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Later that night, the team piled into the bus, the soft hum of the engine filling the silence as the Nekoma players settled into their seats. You slid into a spot next to Kenma, Kuroo sitting in the row just ahead, his head tilted back against the seat.
As the bus started to roll down the road, you pulled out some flyers Sugawara had given you earlier and turned to Kenma and Kuroo. "Hey, by the way, Sugawara invited me to a festival nearby. His and my brother’s band, Secondhand Youth, is opening." You held out the flyer so they could see. "You guys listen to pop-punk, right?"
Kenma glanced up from his DS, raising an eyebrow, but before he could say anything, Kuroo replied a little too quickly, "Sure!" His voice was overly enthusiastic, and his eyes darted to you for a reaction.
Kenma blinked, clearly unimpressed. He gave Kuroo a sideways look, stifling a smirk as he mimicked, "Sure." His tone was flat, dripping with sarcasm.
You snorted, trying to hide a laugh, but Kuroo shot Kenma a mock glare. “What? It’s not like I don’t listen to it.”
Kenma couldn’t resist. “Name one band.” He leaned his chin on his hand, watching Kuroo with a blank stare, knowing full well his friend didn’t have a clue.
Kuroo paused, clearly stumped, his mouth opening and closing as if searching for a band name. “Well, Secondhand Youth, obviously.” You couldn’t help but giggle, and Kuroo turned to you, his expression a mix of mild panic and frustration.
"Okay, fine, maybe I’m not a huge fan," Kuroo admitted, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly, "but I’d still go. For the experience, you know?"
Kenma rolled his eyes but kept a small smile on his lips. “Yeah, the experience of pretending to like music you’ve never heard of.”
You nudged Kuroo’s seat playfully from behind, your smile softening. "You don’t have to, Kuroo. But… you’re welcome to come, if you want."
Kuroo’s eyes met yours, his expression softening as well. “Nah, I wanna go,” he said, his voice sincere this time. “Could be fun.”
Kenma returned to his game, though he couldn’t hide the amusement in his eyes as he watched you and Kuroo interact.
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horoscope1078 · 2 days
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:,)
Gavi wasn’t used to feeling nervous. On the football pitch he was fearless, commanding and full of energy. But tonight was different. Tonight he wasn’t the relentless midfielder controlling the game. Tonight he was just a guy on his first date with a girl he couldn’t stop thinking about.
He sat at the table in the small, cozy restaurant.. tapping his fingers lightly against the menu, glancing at the door every few seconds. The warm lights above him cast a soft glow over the room and the smell of delicious food lingered in the air. But all Gavi could focus on was the anticipation twisting in his stomach.
You were running a little late and with each passing minute his nerves grew. What if he said something stupid? What if you didn’t like the restaurant? What if this wasn’t what you wanted after all?
Just as he was about to spiral into another round of self-doubt the door to the restaurant opened and there you were. His heart skipped a beat as you walked in. Your eyes scanned the room until landed on him. You smiled and all of his worries melted away and replaced by an overwhelming sense of warmth.
“Hey” you said softly as you approached the table. Your voice laced with a hint of shyness. “Sorry I’m a little late. Traffic was crazy.”
Gavi stood up quickly.. nearly knocking his chair over in the process which made you giggle. “No no.. it’s fine! I wasn’t waiting long” he stammered with scratching the back of his neck as he tried to play it cool. “You look.. you look amazing.”
Your cheeks flushed at his compliment and you glanced down at your dress with a bashful smile. “Thanks. You look great too.”
You both sat down.. the air between you buzzing with nervous energy. Gavi reached for the menu.. trying to focus on the words in front of him but his mind kept drifting back to the fact that you were sitting right there. After weeks of texting and hanging out in group settings.. here you were.. on an actual date. And suddenly it all felt so real.
You peeked up at him over your menu with lips curving into a small smile. “So.. how’s training been? Are you ready for the next match?”
Gavi nodded. He was grateful for the familiar topic. “Yea.. training’s been good. The coaches have been pushing us hard but I think we’re ready. I mean.. I hope we are.”
You laughed and the sound was like music to his ears. “You’re always ready. I’ve seen you play.. you never back down.”
He smiled a little shyly at your words. “Thanks. But..um..what about you? How’s work going?”
You shrugged.. tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. “Busy but good. Nothing as exciting as football though.”
Gavi laughed.. feeling the tension in his shoulders slowly start to ease. There was something about the way you talked, the way you smiled that made him feel more comfortable. Maybe he didn’t need to overthink this. Maybe he could just.. enjoy it.
The waiter came over to take your order and both of you fumbled over your words as you tried to decide what to get. After a few awkward moments of indecision you settled on sharing a few dishes.. something Gavi was secretly relieved about since it meant you wouldn’t have to stress about picking the right thing.
Once your order was placed the conversation flowed a little more easily. You talked about everything and nothing.. football, movies, embarrassing childhood stories. Gavi found himself laughing more than he had in a long time and every time you laughed with him his heart did a little flip.
Still.. beneath the laughter there was an undercurrent of nervousness. Every now and then your hands would brush against each other on the table..sending a spark of electricity through both of you. You would glance at each other, blush and quickly look away as if neither of you knew what to do with the tension building between you.
At one point..after a particularly funny story from you Gavi leaned forward slightly.. resting his chin on his hand as he looked at you. “You know.. I’ve been thinking about this for a while” he admitted with his voice a little quieter and a little more serious.
You tilted your head with your brows raising in curiosity. “Thinking about what?”
“Us” Gavi said with his eyes flicking up to meet yours. “This. I’ve wanted to ask you out for so long but I didn’t know how.”
Your cheeks flushed again and you bit your lip.. your eyes dropping to the table for a moment before meeting his gaze again. “Really? I thought.. I thought maybe you were just being nice. Like..as a friend.”
Gavi felt his heart skip a beat. “No.. definitely not just as a friend” he said with his voice a little firmer this time. “I mean.. I love hanging out with you but I’ve been wanting this for a while. I just didn’t know if you felt the same.”
For a moment you didn’t say anything. Gavi’s nerves came rushing back in full force. Had he said too much? Was he moving too fast? But then you smiled..a soft, shy smile that made his chest tighten.
“I do” you whispered. “I’ve felt the same way.”
The relief that washed over Gavi was almost overwhelming. He hadn’t even realized how much he’d been holding his breath until you said those words. He grinned.. unable to stop himself and you laughed softly at his reaction.
“Well.. that’s good to know” Gavi said with his voice light with amusement. “Because I don’t think I could’ve taken another week of pretending like I didn’t have a crush on you.”
Your blush deepened and you covered your face with your hands..letting out an embarrassed laugh. “Omg.. don’t say it like that!”
“What? It’s true!” Gavi teased with leaning forward a little more.. his heart racing as he felt the shift in the air between you. “You’re kind of stuck with me now.”
You peeked at him from behind your hands as your eyes sparkling with both nervousness and excitement. “I think I’m okay with that.”
Your food arrived shortly after but by then the tension had eased. The nervousness that had been hanging between you at the start of the night had given way to something else. Something sweeter.. something that felt like the beginning of something real.
As you shared your meal and exchanged smiles Gavi couldn’t help but feel like he was exactly where he was supposed to be. For the first time in a long time he wasn’t thinking about football or the pressure or anything else. All that mattered was you sitting across from him, your smile making his heart race in the best way possible.
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chirpsythismorning · 8 months
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Just remembered that Will sat on the icebox in the van for the 30 hr ride back to Hawkins
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#byler#stranger things#that willelmike dynamic in the van after the monologue needs to be studied under a microscope#like why couldn’t we see the aftermath of his monologue???#what happened??#when will sat on the icebox did el and mike look confused??#did they offer to leave room for him to sit there but he declined politely like no that’s okay…#followed by the next 30 hrs of awkward#I know the vibes were OFF#that’s the reason they only let us be confronted with them by the time they arrived in Hawkins#they needed to shift the mood to confusion about Hawkins’ state#bc they could not reveal what the vibes were like before that#no but the prospects of el hugging all of them after saving max#and it’s like emotional and they’re all so relieved she’s alive#but then shortly after that when they’re planning going back to Hawkins#she’s distant again#maybe it’s with everyone so they just brush it off as her needing time to process everything#but it’s still suspicious because…#why are things with her and mike still feeling very off#and then that’s when they’re getting into the van and then will just adds to the awkwardness even more by sitting on the icebox 😭#I also noticed 2 pillows on the backseat so it’s likely that’s where byler slept in s4 during their shenanigans#so I’m guessing that where el and mike slept while Will slept on the floor 😭#no but seriously they could not show any of that without giving it all away#the angst and heartbreak and confusion and regret would have been so loud 😅
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jesuis-assez · 1 month
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↠ Tim & Lucy scenes ↳ 5x10 - The List
#chenford#chenfordedit#the rookie#tim x lucy#tim and lucy#therookieedit#lucy x tim#jesuis assez edits: Chenford#jesuis assez edits: Chenford scenes#Tim was so nervous#When they reached their second date.. They were in their element. It was more them as opposed to the fancy setting.#He could breathe with ease. Just be there in the moment with her. They could just be them. Just Tim and Lucy.#He could melt into her the way he always does.#Whether that be in the form of a kiss / hug or a touch of any means.#or even gaze at her intently the way he did here in this scene [ok the whole episode. ] [ok just about every time he looks at her]#Even touching her with his fingertips brushing over her skin \ hearing her voice \ a single look that#communicates what words cannot say is enough to quieten the anxiety.#or the emotional storm raging within Tim. Even for a fleeting moment as they have done so before.#Tim has this way of giving Lucy his full and undivided attention. Listening to her attentively. He takes in every word she says to him#Hanging onto every word and holding a space for those words in the doorways of his mind. and allowing her influence to wash over him.#Because he values her opinion just as much as she values his. So when she expressed a [need] for him to reset his expectations#he switched on instantly to meet that need. He too wants for them to take their time and explore this slowly.#They're on mutual ground with this and maybe it's something Tim didn't realise he wanted until Lucy voiced it.#The way he begins to process what she is wanting from the relationship right now and needing from him#and how it sinks in that he wants that too#I think Tim could've been content to sit in silence with her all night despite the nerves bubbling up inside of him.#Just completely content with beaming at her all night. Content to admire her through tender eyes.
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A big part of author life is learning to make peace with the stories you'll never write.
#adventures in writing#there are layers to this#one part is learning that not every intriguing idea can or should be a complete story#you can just let it sit in an idea folder as a fun daydream and that's fine#then there are the ones that just cycle through#catch your attention for a while but then fall away#but every so often they come to mind and get developed further#and it's likely that one day maybe some of them will stick around long enough to get written#then there are the ones you have to let go#they interested you for a long time and may even have in-depth developments/significant parts of drafts#and you have to recognize that there were fatal flaws to the idea that prevent it from coming to life#and/or you've moved beyond the person you were then and aren't going to be able to write that story in the way it needs#but some of those still stick in your head#coming to mind and making you think maybe you could revamp them into something usable#and you gotta decide if it's worth the effort or if you should prioritize more recent ideas#because this process is cumulative and gets worse as you get older#today i am very very close to trying to find someone who's read my arateph stories#and asking if they'd let me just spill all the plot points of all the arateph retellings i've never written#some have fatal flaws but all have at least some aspect that i really loved#and it kills me not to have any of it in other people's imaginations#the main character and themes of the princess and the pea one#the character arc potential of the goose girl one#the clever (i think) twist on the central little red riding hood moment#one heartwrenching scene in rapunzel#i don't know if i'll ever be able to write the stories but the ideas still live in me and sometimes it hurts to keep it inside#anyhow have a good day
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avatar-aaang · 1 month
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oh okay so she can send out an email about staff birthdays but not the fucking schedule. got it. Priorities.
#personal#every single new coworker ive met lately has the same opinion of her that my usual coworkers do:#she should absolutely NOT be in this position. she is bad at it and doesnt listen to any of us#also. i think her hiring was maybe... racist. like shes a white woman. fine whatever#but i was speaking to one of my coworkers whos an older Black woman (one of my new fav coworkers too shes a hoot)#and she said that she and about r or 5 others were on a panel to sit in for the interview process that hired current manager#and she started listing everyone else who was there and i was like huh. every she mentioned is also Black. interesting#and she said not a single one of them picked current manager and gave their reasons why#and it seems to me that all of their opinions were so neatly ignored. so like why invite them? for diversity points? to look inclusive?#to make it seem like we even had a choice?#bc that is not a good look!!!#id say a third to half of my entire coworker group is Black and to find out that a small group of them were ignored when actively asked for#their opinion on a very important decision? yea no that doesnt seem right#and i think when my coworker told me she knew. and im like hmm. makes me wonder what to do#i mean i will be emailing hr soon enough bc current manager is not just annoying and incompetent but also ableist lol#i just need to get together with some coworkers so we can draft one large complaint bc umm. yea fuck this stupid bitch oh my god. ive had it#with her and her antics and the librarys too since they wanna ignore my coworkers apparently!#most of whom are older and retired teachers and actively and always know what the fuck theyre doing#id trust literally any of my coworkers to do managers job before manager. bc i know literally any of them could do it
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seventh-district · 8 months
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.
#Seven’s Public Diary#vent post#cw vent post#vent#cw vent#wound mention#sighs deeply#had to take my shirt off for someone recently for medical reasons and while 'oh you poor thing..' is far from the worst response ive gotten#it's definitely still strange to hear. like i'm not rlly surprised‚ i am aware that i'm an upsetting sight#and i keep myself covered all the time to avoid upsetting people that can't handle the sight of marred skin#but i've grown so comfortable in my body over all these years that an interesting side effect of that is that i tend to forget#just how shocked and upset and worried ppl tend to get when they see me. it's almost funny. the sad kind of funny i guess#guess i'd rather laugh than dwell on the knowledge that i'm a set of walking trigger warnings that must be censored#anyways. that experience combined with the stressful and tiring process of tending to a wound on my back for the last 2 weeks#has me thinking about Ch. 5 of AEIWNF. for... reasons. so maybe i'll finally make myself draft and post that today#there's so many things i need to make myself do but the appeal of just sitting alone weaving bracelets and binge-listening to TMA is strong#the urge to be alone and craft things while listening to stories told through a lo-fi medium... where does it come from#that's a rhetorical question i know exactly where it came from. i'm just turning into both of my grandmothers lmao#what's the line. 'i've got my grandmother's veins in the back of my hands' what's that from. it's a Wonder Years song right#Hoodie Weather!!! yeah that's it. man i haven't listened to that in ages. maybe that'll be today's weather report#anyways. what else can i vent about. uhh. it's getting harder and harder to put my thoughts into words and that's concerning!#i'm fighting the desire to push everyone away again even though it feels like i should. i'm too toxic of a person#like. talk to any of the people that have ghosted/blocked me and they'll likely tell you to stop wasting your time on me lmao#and they'd probably be right. i'm so caught up in my own issues that i feel bad for anyone that tries to be friendly to me#everyone gets sick of my shit eventually. i'm overbearing and self-centered or you don't hear from me for months. there's no inbetween#i wish there was. god i wish there was#i'm never active on here anymore bc i feel like if i am then that's disrespectful to everyone waiting to hear back from me#but it's so much easier for me to post and reblog stuff than it is to talk one on one with literally anyone#it's not even social anxiety atp there's just something wrong with my brain. like not to self diagnose but Something's Wrong#okay that's enough whining. gonna go try to do something productive to make myself feel less useless
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daisies-on-a-cup · 1 year
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watched the virgin suicides for the first time, like literally 5 minutes ago. i feel like i need to let the movie sink in for me to actually feel anything about it, but it just didn't... idk, i feel like it had a message, it definitely was saying something about girlhood and the abstractions placed upon girls from an early age as designated by their peers and the male-sex, but idk... i need to watch a video essay about it or something bc it's hitting me but idk what exactly it is hitting me with
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goldkirk · 2 years
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at least once a month I look up and go when the FUCK did I get a dog????? when the HELL did I get here? how did I end up in Seattle? what happened to my life? when did I get a DOG??????? why am I so shut out of my family? how did I mess things up? what carnage did I leave in my path? who said I could make decisions and move out here? why did I make a decision at all? What happened to me? How do I know any of this is right or safe? Why did I get a dog? Where are the kids? what caused me to finally leave? Why am I here? When did I flee? Why did I flee?
and then I remember who cares about the details if I’m feeling better here, and go merrily about my day knowing they’ll come back when they’re needed and someday the facts will stay.
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munamania · 2 years
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btw if you even care
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opens-up-4-nobody · 2 years
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...
#i am back to lementing the phd hunting process#also hate watching mountain climbing documentaries. but thats not the point rn#its just. i know where i want to go. i have 2 options that would be idea and maybe a 3rd. maybe#one of those options is dependent upon me getting a scholarship that doesnt seem likely. but still an option#so i dont think ill really find anything else thats perfect. so i should just focus on applications#but thats so terrifying. bc like what if they dont want me :'( im tempted to apply to 2 programs at the same school just bc i kinda really#want to get in there. but also i havent looked at the application fee yet and i dont wanna spend like an extra fee if i can get into the#program i actually want. ugh. and then theres actually writing thr statement of purpose rip#like idk what it is abt writing abt myself but its so exhausting. i think maybe its bc i lived it so im just like. ugh. boring! let me#blabber on abt things i like. let me be weird. let me break the format of what im supposed to do#let me be a freak >:-[ and obviously its all gotta be done in non work hours. so thst extends the hours im doing productive stuff in a way#thats exhausting. blah and i have to have 2 Manuscripts ready to submit by November 1. ugh. it would b easier#if i could just sit down and write and not just bounce around between tasks and not get things done#annoying. but allas. here we r. by December 1 everything should be submitted and then i just have to hope and prey they want me#then i just have to fugure out how and when im moving across either the country or to a different country#rip. at least ill have the summer to maybe chill? bc my employment ends after spring and my parents said i coulf hang with them#and maybe take a trip to Greece? Maybe? that'd be pretty sweet. idk well see whst happens#ugh. academia why!#i need to pray to the writing gods to grant me strength and focus. or the writing demons. whoever is more willing to help#unrelated
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