#No-Code Testing Solutions

[assureqa-ai]

Low-Code vs. No-Code Automation Testing: Choosing the Right Tool for Your QA Success

Low-Code vs. No-Code Automation Testing Tools Choosing the right automation testing tool can revolutionize your software quality assurance process. Low-code tools offer flexibility with minimal coding, perfect for complex workflows, while no-code tools empower non-technical users to automate effortlessly. When it comes to the best platform, Assure QA stands out. With expertise in functional, automation, performance, and security testing, Assure QA provides robust, high-performing solutions tailored to your needs. Its intuitive platform allows you to create reusable, scalable tests and offers seamless integration with CI/CD pipelines. Simplify your automation journey with Assure QA\u2014your trusted partner for exceptional software quality assurance.

[pixelatedraindrops]

Yuma Month: Day 20: Truth

The truth…is uglier than you could have ever expected.

tw // vomit (spoilers too)

...happens only if he ate a meat bun prior to this

(all vomit in rain code is censored in pink glitter ✨)

based on this post I made long back

[this-is-a-name-dont-worry]

i have to admit, I quite love that the Code put cracks on Flippa because it remembers that it was what gave it away back at the presidential dinner, but here it's actually a mistake because she never got the cracks.

idk i cant really explain it, but i love when the machine thinks it got what should do the trick but then failed

Also yeah, Slime is willing to look past any things that aren't right so it's easier to manipulate, but in the case of the Code where it's acting like a self learning AI, it could become a double edged sword. Any mistake done gets overlooked, so it can't know it made a mistake, so this mistake can be repeated in the future with other attempts at eggs mimicking!

[vcqrupvt]

Smart Labels: The Game-Changer for Innovative and Secure Packaging

Embrace the next generation of packaging by stepping into the future with smart label packaging and smart labels that bring unparalleled innovation to your products. These cutting-edge solutions go beyond traditional labeling, offering advanced functionalities that enhance both the security and efficiency of your operations.

One of the most significant advantages of this technology is the integration of smart label QR codes and smart label tracking systems. These features allow you to track your products in real time, providing you with valuable insights into their journey from production to the hands of your customers. This enhanced visibility not only streamlines your supply chain but also fortifies your brand's security by reducing the risk of counterfeiting and theft.

Smart packaging is more than just a trend—it's a revolutionary approach that incorporates smart labels and packaging solutions to create a seamless and interactive experience for both businesses and consumers. By leveraging Technology-Based Smart Labels, you can achieve superior results in terms of product authenticity, traceability, and consumer engagement. These labels can carry a wealth of information, from product details and usage instructions to promotional offers, all accessible through a simple scan.

Partnering with top Smart Labels companies and Smart Labels Manufacturers is key to staying ahead in this rapidly evolving industry. These industry leaders provide access to the latest innovations, including smart labels Tamper-Evident Labels, which ensure your products remain secure throughout their lifecycle. Additionally, smart storage QR labels offer a smart way to manage inventory, while qr code smart labels technology enables instant access to essential product information, enhancing both the user experience and product security.

By integrating these advanced smart label technologies into your packaging, you’re not just adopting a new trend—you’re setting a new standard for innovation, security, and consumer engagement in your industry. This forward-thinking approach will position your brand as a leader in the market, ensuring that you stay competitive and relevant in the eyes of your customers.

[glowettee]

✧˖° studying without suffering: how to actually enjoy learning (yes, it’s possible)

✧˖° let’s talk.

hey angels, it's mindy!

most people treat studying like a punishment. something to be endured, not enjoyed. it’s that thing you force yourself to do, like taking bitter medicine or running a mile in gym class. but what if that’s the reason you struggle with it?

the secret? you were never meant to hate learning.

somewhere along the way, school made it boring. maybe you had teachers who sucked the fun out of it. maybe you associate studying with stress, deadlines, and exhaustion. but learning is supposed to be exciting. when you actually enjoy it, everything changes. you focus longer, retain more, and (ironically) spend less time studying because your brain actually absorbs the information.

so, let’s fix it. let’s make studying something you want to do instead of something you suffer through.

✧˖° ➼ step 1: detach learning from school

(school & learning are not the same thing. stop letting school ruin your curiosity.)

the first mindset shift? realize that school does not own learning.

➼ school is about structure, deadlines, and tests. it’s designed to measure performance. ➼ learning is about curiosity, deep thinking, and exploration. it’s designed to expand your mind. and help you grow as a person.

if you’ve only ever studied because you had to, your brain associates it with pressure. break that pattern. find something outside of school that you actually like learning about. philosophy, psychology, art history, neuroscience, fashion design, whatever makes you curious.

even if it’s unrelated to your classes, it rewires your brain to see learning as an intrinsic activity, not just an obligation. once you enjoy learning in general, you can transfer that energy back into your studies.

✧˖° ➼ step 2: romanticize the process (but actually make it feel good)

("romanticizing studying" doesn’t mean just buying cute stationery. let’s go deeper.)

sensory association is everything. your brain links experiences to the way they feel physically. so if studying feels uncomfortable, you’ll avoid it. the solution? make it a luxurious experience for your senses.

✧ visuals → clean, minimalist desk, soft lighting, aesthetic study materials ✧ sound → rain sounds, classical piano, lo-fi beats (music that enhances focus) ✧ touch → cozy blankets, warm tea, smooth pens gliding over paper ✧ scent → vanilla candles, fresh coffee, the pages of an old book

this isn’t just about aesthetics. it’s neuroscience. when studying feels pleasurable, your brain stops resisting it.

✧˖° ➼ step 3: use high-dopamine study techniques

(forcing yourself to study the “normal” way is why you hate it.)

some study methods are literally designed to be boring. ditch them.

instead, try:

➼ blurting method: instead of passively reading, close your book and write down everything you remember. then check what you missed. (way more engaging than just re-reading notes.) ➼ dual-coding: mix visuals with text. draw tiny sketches next to your notes. turn concepts into mind maps. watch a video explaining a topic right after reading about it. ➼ pomodoro stacking: instead of the typical 25-minute study sprints, customize it. (ex: 50 min deep focus + 10 min break with an actual reward.) ➼ interleaving technique: mix subjects instead of block studying. it forces your brain to stay engaged.

stop making studying harder than it needs to be. find what works for you, and your brain will stop fighting it.

✧˖° ➼ step 4: make studying social (but in a smart way)

(because you’re not supposed to do this alone.)

studying alone for hours? miserable. but studying with others who are just as serious as you? instant motivation boost.

but instead of chaotic group study sessions where no one gets anything done, try:

✧ parallel studying: hop on facetime or join a study livestream. silent, focused, but together. ✧ teaching method: explain concepts to a friend. if you can teach it, you truly understand it. ✧ study accountability: check in with someone daily. send each other your study goals, no excuses.

even just knowing someone else is studying at the same time can trick your brain into feeling more engaged.

✧˖° ➼ step 5: shift your identity

("i hate studying" isn’t a personality trait. it’s a mindset problem.)

if you keep saying “i hate studying,” your brain will never enjoy it. change the narrative.

➼ instead of “i suck at studying,” try → “i’m learning how to study in a way that works for me.” ➼ instead of “i can’t focus,” try → “i’m training my brain to focus longer every day.” ➼ instead of “i don’t feel like it,” try → “i’m someone who gets things done, whether i feel like it or not.”

become the type of person who enjoys learning. once that becomes your identity, everything else follows.

✧˖° ➼ step 6: create emotional attachment to your goals

motivation dies when your goals feel distant and impersonal. if you’re studying just because you “have to,” it’s easy to procrastinate. but if you link it to something deeply personal, it becomes non-negotiable.

try this: visualize your future self. imagine the version of you who already achieved everything you want. who is she? what does she do? how does she study?

then, make it emotional. ✧ if you dream of getting into your dream school, print pictures of it. make a vision board. ✧ if you want financial freedom, imagine the luxury of never stressing over money. ✧ if you want to be respected in your field, remind yourself that your knowledge is your power.

when you make studying personal, it stops being a chore. it becomes a commitment.

✧˖° ➼ step 7: stop making everything harder than it needs to be

(struggling doesn’t mean you’re working harder. it just means you’re struggling.)

too many people study inefficiently because they think suffering = productivity. but studying smarter is always better than studying longer.

some ways to make it easier on yourself: ➼ use study apps → quizlet, pomdoro apps for focus, notion for organization ➼ summarize like you’re texting a friend → rewrite notes in your own words, no unnecessary fluff ➼ study in “levels” → don’t jump straight into deep studying. warm up with light review, then increase intensity ➼ take advantage of spaced repetition → stop cramming, your brain retains more when you review over time

efficiency = less stress, better results. don’t work harder than necessary.

✧˖° ➼ step 8: replace toxic productivity with high-performance habits

studying 10 hours in one night ≠ academic excellence. true high-achievers prioritize sustainability.

➼ quit glorifying exhaustion. taking breaks improves focus. it’s not laziness. ➼ learn when to walk away. if you’re zoning out, step away. 10 minutes of real focus > 2 hours of fake studying. ➼ protect your sleep. all-nighters don’t make you hardcore, they make you ineffective. your brain processes info while you sleep.

the goal isn’t to study the longest. it’s to study in a way that keeps your mind sharp and focused.

✧˖° ➼ step 9: master the “dopamine pull” method

instead of forcing motivation, use dopamine to your advantage.

➼ habit stacking → pair studying with something enjoyable (ex: study while drinking your favorite matcha) ➼ mini rewards → after finishing a chapter, reward yourself with something small but satisfying ➼ gamification → track progress like a video game. every completed task = a “level up”

your brain loves dopamine. give it reasons to associate studying with good feelings.

✧˖° ➼ step 10: let go of perfectionism (but keep high standards)

perfectionism leads to procrastination and burnout. instead of striving for flawless, aim for consistent excellence.

✧ done is better than perfect. stop rewriting notes 5 times. ✧ progress is the goal. each study session should move you forward, even if it’s small. ✧ your worth is not your grades. strive for success, but don’t let school define you.

when you release perfectionism, you actually start achieving more. keep your standards high, but don’t let them paralyze you.

✧˖° mindy’s personal tips

(things that helped me romanticize studying & actually make it enjoyable:)

➼ set a 5-minute timer. just start. most of the time, your brain stops resisting once you begin. ➼ don’t let study guilt ruin your breaks. rest is productive. ➼ have a “study fit.” i swear, dressing up just a little makes a difference. ➼ invest in one high-quality pen. something that glides effortlessly. small detail, huge difference. ➼ study in cafés, libraries, parks. switch locations to keep it interesting. ➼ make it ✧ cozy ✧. fuzzy socks, oversized sweaters, soft blankets. your comfort matters.

✧˖° homework: rewire your study experience

➼ for one of your study sessions this week, try at least two of the techniques above. ➼ write a short journal entry: how do you want to feel while studying? how can you make that happen? ➼ change just one thing about your study setup that makes it more enjoyable.

then come back & tell me. did studying feel better? (you can always message me or send me an ask in my inbox)

[jaewritesfic]

Everlasting Trio Nobody Knows AU DP x DC Part 4

Part 3

(Tim POV! This is a long one 😅)

 Tim almost has it. He's so close to cracking this file he can fucking taste it. He's been fighting this thing for two weeks. It's the most incomprehensible and infuriating code he's ever faced off against, which is fitting considering who gave it to them.

The engineer. THEIR engineer. The engineer they didn't ask for and Tim still isn't sure how they got, and the single biggest mystery in Tim's fucking life right now.

See, a significant amount of Bat gadgets at this point are Tim's brainchildren. He imagines them, he designs them, he workshops and tests them.

A few months ago, he'd had a pouch on his utility belt full of experimental pellets meant for slowing down fleeing vehicles. They were designed to break when run over and the compound inside would expand into durable, sticky foam that would ensnare tires.

He'd tested them in the cave.

He had not been prepared to take one hit to that side and have to frantically divest himself of that pouch before he became Gotham's latest foam based cryptid. 

His family had laughed themselves silly at him even as he broke off in pursuit of the drug runners he'd been fighting.

When Tim had doubled back expecting a mess to clean up and pellets to rework? It had been gone. All of it. The foam, the pellets, the pouch of his utility belt.

A serious problem, because who knows who got their hands on that?

Then it had shown back up.

That is to say, Gordon had called them because he found a pouch with a note labeled ‘for Red Robin’ sitting on the stand of the Bat Signal and didn't dare touch it.

After making sure it wasn't a bomb or some kind of biological weapon, Tim had opened the pouch - his own belt pouch - and found pellets. New pellets. Different pellets.

The note just read, “As funny as that was to watch, I fixed them for you. No more premature sploogage on the job. :3 P.S. here's a recipe for solution to dissolve future intentional discharges.”

They'd been right, too. The new pellets were tested (in case THEY were a bomb or biological weapon) and they'd been just strong enough to safely transport but still break when under the pressure of tires. Even the foam was more effective, and the spray Tim synthesized from that stupid recipe had worked like a dream.

What. The fuck.

This person not only improved his design and came up with a dissolution agent from scratch in days, they'd been watching without him knowing and made off with the original pellets without anyone noticing.

This was either a rogue in the making or someone they wanted on their side, and either way they needed to be found.

So Tim had done the obvious.

He'd put together a lockbox of money for the product they'd been given, loaded it with no less than ten (10) bat trackers and a note thanking their mysterious benefactor and requesting to meet up. He'd exploded a foam pellet on a rooftop and left the box on it in the hopes they'd notice and find it, then hung around far enough to not be seen and close enough to beat feet as soon as the trackers started moving. 

They did not start moving. They all went offline simultaneously. 

Tim has never moved so fast in his life, and yet by the time he got to the rooftop there was a pile of foam and nothing else. Not even a trace of whoever took the lockbox.

The next day, there was a ping of one (1) tracker that led them to a note thanking him for the money, refusing to meet, and asking if they'd considered certain improvements to their grapples with schematics for said designs.

Thus started the most bizarre and infuriating chase through notes, money, helpful designs and disappearing trackers Tim has ever been a part of.

Last time, the engineer had left them a USB stick and a note claiming that since they really wanted to know about him so bad, they could have the information on the USB if they could crack the encryption on the zip file inside.

Obviously they screened heavily for viruses or backdoors, but long story short Tim has been trying to crack the fucking thing for two weeks and refuses to let Oracle help. It's personal. It's a matter of pride. 

He could swear the code itself has actively been sabotaging his attempts to hack it, which is, you know. Impossible. 

Ping!

Tim blinks, looking over at the map on another monitor of the Bat computer. 

“Motherfucker-”

He taps into Duke’s comms. This is the first time this has ever happened during the day shift, he wasn't expecting it.

“Signal! I need you on the roof of the warehouse on the corner of Fifth and Everest - a tracker just came online.”

Another thing that infuriates Tim. You can't just turn Bat trackers on and off. They're activated, and then they either stay active or they're destroyed. They can't be turned off and then reactivated.

And fucking yet.

Duke groans, but his own tracker starts making its way in that direction.

“Dude. He's gonna be long gone by the time I get there. He always is.”

“He can't run from me forever,” Tim insists. “I'm almost in this damn file, and I am going to find him and dangle him off a roof from his ankles for giving us this runaround, so help me God.”

“Uh huh,” Duke deadpans. “Sure you are. I'm almost there, and- oh look! A note. What a surprise!”

Tim hears Duke touch down on the rooftop, eyes on the code on his screen while his brother clears his throat and reads aloud.

“Ahem- ‘Good morning, sunshine!’ - guess that's me - ‘I hear some bats and birds have been murdering tires at an alarming rate with the way they drive their bikes-’”

Tim freezes. He's not listening anymore.

“Signal.”

“‘- and that just can't be good for business. Nobody wants a bald tire ruining a chase. So boy do I have the thing for you-”

“Signal!”

“What?”

“I got it.”

“Huh? Got what?”

“I cracked his file. I got it.”

Tim is staring, wide eyed and full of a mixture of elation and trepidation at the contents of the zip file. It's a single text file titled, ‘Wow! You did it!’

“Oh, shit? Well? What's in it?”

Tim swallows, mouse hovering over the file. He takes a deep breath, then double clicks.

The file opens.

Tim blinks.

“Red Robin? What's in it?”

Tim scrolls slowly down, disbelief and horror dawning across his face. “Oh my God.”

“What? Come on, man, talk to me.”

Tim scrolls further.

“Oh. My God.”

“Red? Red Robin, you're scaring me, man.”

Tim puts his face in his hands. Voice muffled, he responds.

“Duke.”

“...Red? You okay?”

“No.”

“No?”

“It's the entire Bee Movie script.”

Silence reigns for a solid five seconds before Duke breaks and descends into raucous, hysterical laughter.

Even muffled by his own hands, Tim's scream of rage scares the bats in the cave into a tizzy.

Part 5

Masterpost

[zoofsoftware]

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[copperbadge]

I have a lot of feelings about the use of AI in Everything These Days, but they're not particularly strong feelings, like I've got other shit going on. That said, when I use a desktop computer, every single file I use in Google Drive now has a constant irritating popup on the right-hand side asking me how Gemini AI Can Help Me. You can't, Gemini. You are in the way. I'm not even mad there's an AI there, I'm mad there's a constantly recurring popup taking up space and attention on my screen.

Here's the problem, however: even Gemini doesn't know how to disable Gemini. I did my own research and then finally, with a deep appreciation of the irony of this, I asked it how to turn it off. It said in any google drive file go to Help > Gemini and there will be an option to turn it off. Guess what isn't a menu item under Help?

I've had a look around at web tutorials for removing or blocking it, but they are either out of date or for the Gemini personal assistant, which I already don't have, and thus cannot turn off. Gemini for Drive is an integrated "service" within Google Drive, which I guess means I'm going to have to look into moving off Google Drive.

So, does anyone have references for a service as seamless and accessible as Google Drive? I need document, spreadsheet, slideshow, and storage, but I don't have any fancy widgets installed or anything. I do technically own Microsoft Office so I suppose I could use that but I've never found its cloud function to actually, uh, function. I could use OneNote for documents if things get desperate but OneNote is very limited overall. I want to be able to open and edit files, including on an Android phone, and I'd prefer if I didn't have to receive a security code in my text messages every time I log in. I also will likely need to be able to give non-users access, but I suppose I could kludge that in Drive as long as I only have to deal with it short-term.

Any thoughts, friends? If I find a good functional replacement I'm happy to post about it once I've tested it.

Also, saying this because I love you guys but if I don't spell it out I will get a bunch of comments about it: If you yourself have managed to banish Gemini from your Drive account including from popping up in individual files, I'm interested! Please share. If you have not actually implemented a solution yourself, rest assured, anything you find I have already tried and it does not work.

[melinoelabs]

Dear Sirs.

SCP-682's powers are metatextual. He's unkillable because the story says he is nearly unkillable and no solution would be satisfying. His nickname is 'the very hard to destroy reptile' for rigour's sake. You don't have to be Grant Morrison to put this together.

The solution is to alter the narrative so that there is a means of killing him that is satisfying. Unfortunately, only full-on apocalypse scenarios or the use of SCP-682 as a jobber for an even worse threat would fill that criteria.

So unless you want to unleash something even more tiresome, like the Black Moon or the Scarlet King or the Yellow Submarine or whatever other color-coded doomsday monster you have on tap, you're just wasting jumpsuit filling doing anything at all.

The easy alternative is to simply stop trying to kill him.

Just focus on holding him in the most boring, routine ways possible, rendering him increasingly less interesting and thus reducing the time between stories focused on him and thus, the resulting breaches and disasters.

Or you can do what we did. If you aren't chicken.

Ours wasn't a rotted lizard. It was a sort of mummified horse the size of a 1996 Volkswagen Harlequin, and it was a she, but otherwise same deal. Regeneration. Vat of acid. Mass casualties. Violent opposition to the use of breath mints. Endemic to all life. Po-tay-to, po-tah-to.

We figured out the how it worked, and we speed-ran the whole concept, hurling that vile beast through a veritable plinko-fall of thousands of extermination tests and controlled rampages until there was literally nothing left to do with the 'More-Than-One-Way-to-Fail-to-Kill-a Horse'.

And we trust the populace enough to not lie to them for 'their own good'. Because its funny? Sure. Profitable? Absolutely (don't worry, shareholders!)! But never for 'their own good.'

So we turned those experiments into a 17 season reality television program hosted by Greg Kinnear and force-fed them to a sludge-hungry populace.

There were 'More-Than-One-Way-to-Fail-to-Kill-a Horse' calendars, coffee mugs, t-shirts, two different animated spin-offs running at the same time for some reason, four movies starring Chris Pratt as the voice of the horse, an ongoing sketch on Late Night with Conan O'Brien, 'More-Than-One-Way-to-Fail-to-Kill-a Horse' "acid bath" sour candy flavored yogurt in a tube, a series of increasingly inadequately playtested gameboy cartridges, a 27-issue limited series from Image comics, and adorable plush mummified murder-horse plushes with little suction cups on their red-felt hooves so they can stare balefully out the back of your station wagon at that ASSHOLE Kevin in his souped up Trans AM who does not understand the concept of a safe following distance, and you JUST want to run him off the road with the magno-lifters and recreate the scene from Lost Highway with Robert Loggia, but "you can't use the magno-lifters for revenge" because it's "against OSHA regulations" and "technically assault!"

And once the first shipment of 'More-Than-One-Way-to-Fail-to-Kill-a Horse' Funko Pops hit store shelves, the creature's cultural cache cratered so hard that it became a parody of itself so predictable it's "containment" is now a Universal Studios attraction with two failed executions and a containment breach each night, with double shows on Saturdays.

Now, it was a rocky ride getting there, especially for Utah (projections say you'll get those House seats back in two, maybe three, generations at most, don't you worry!) but we've proven that even if it isn't killable, you can, in fact, beat a dead horse.

Hope this helps.

Humbert, Outreach Liaison Melinoë Laboratories "Hoc non veniet ad nos mordax"

[meganwhalenturner]

So, last November I got to try my hand at Alchemy

Maddalena Rumor, in the Classics Department of Case Western Reserve University came to have dinner with us and mentioned she'd just successfully turned silver gold.

She had an alchemical recipe from a 7th century BCE cuneiform tablet from the library of Ashurbanipal. She'd been working with Rekha Srinivasan, from the Chemistry Department to see if they could translate the cuneiform, identify the substances mentioned, and then try the recipe to see if it worked.

They traveled to the British Museum to examine the tablet up close. By studying the partial strokes along the edges, Maddalena could make some educated guesses about missing words. Rekha, in turn, could use the descriptions of the substances to make some guesses about what they might be. Then they could start testing their best guesses with experiments.

This is complicated by the tendency of alchemical texts to use code words or inside jokes to describe materials or techniques. Something like me making a recipe that calls for 2 Legs and 1 Arm of Policeman and my friends all knowing it means 2.5 ingots of Copper.

I know the word alchemy comes from the Arabic al-kimia and that it eventually developed into chemistry, but I've always associated it with the worst of the Dark Ages in Europe--charlatans or wannabe magicians in smoke-filled, poorly lit cellars full of of mummified animals and just generally gross stuff that is not my jam.

I'm wondering now if that's because medieval alchemists were reading a lot of things literally that weren't meant to be taken that way. There's a reference in one of Maddalena's article's to a rare case where "human excrement" called for in a recipe is revealed to actually mean "garlic." I can see a lot of ancient alchemists laughing up their sleeves.

I had just learned during a trip to Naples the previous summer that the alchemy of Renaissance philosophers like Pico Della Mirandola was very different from the stuff in the basements of Prague. Instead of dreckapotheke, they were translating texts from the Ancients Greeks, texts that were perhaps based on the very tablets from the 7th Century BCE that Maddalena was studying. I promptly begged to observe her next experiment.

She very graciously said yes, so I went down to a lab at Case and I wish I had taken better notes, but I did not, so what I've got is a bunch of pictures, and I'll have to go back and badger Maddalena for details.

These are the ingredients for the next round of testing.

They will be mixed into a solution in the flask on the right and then heated on a burner.

Then silver tablets will be dipped into the solution:

And turn gold!

Not *into* gold. That was not the plan. Hope you aren't disappointed.

If you thought the object of alchemy in those dark basements in Prague was turn to lead into gold, yeah me, too. And maybe it was, but the alchemy of the ancient Near East seems to have been more clear that transmutation wasn't on offer. After reading some of Maddalena's articles, I now know there were four main practices of alchemy back in the day: coloring silver gold, making a silver alloy that still looked like silver, coloring glass to look like precious stones, and dying wool purple without using those expensive snail shells from Tyre.

I talked about alchemy a lot (really, a lot, everyone was very patient) at a recent writing retreat. Erin Bow called it the Science of Knock Offs.

There are multiple ancient sources that say that this "holy and divine art" (hē hiera kai theia technē) was taught to mankind by fallen angels who were sharing the secrets of heaven. I know it seems ridiculous that an all knowing divine being is going to focus on the Secret Science of Knock Offs, but the more I I think about it, the more I can see it.

ARMUMAHEL: We will share with you the great mysteries of heaven!

MANKIND: . . .

ARMUMAHEL: I can save you some money on purple dye.

MANKIND: YAY!

SAMYAZA: So how did the secret sharing go today, Armumahel? Did they ask about the language of birds? The control over monsters of the deep?

ARMUMAHEL: I told'em how to make glass marbles look like sapphires.

SAMYAZA: You do know Enoch is writing all this down. His book is going to be stuck in the apocrypha and we're going to be laughing stocks.

ARMUMAHEL: I promised to tell them tomorrow how to turn silver gold.

SAMYAZA: Ah! Transmutation of matter! That's a good one!

ARMUMAHEL: No, not transmutation. They just want the silver bowls on the alter to be yellow and shiny.

SAMYAZA: . . .

My shiny yellow tablet. : )

[tinydefector]

Dude i am so hyped for your shockwave rut cycle fic. I have a party hat on and a party popper just stalking your blog waiting for it to drop

Shockwave Rut cycle

Sorry this took so long hand alot come up but it's finally here woooo.

Word count: 1.5k

Warnings: smut, giant/tiny, heat/ mating cycles. Valveplug, NSFW

Masterlist

Shockwave masterlist

Rut cycle masterlist

_____________

It wasn't often Shockwave was around this many Mechs let alone this many Humans in one place. It was all due to him working alongside Autobots in a hope of creating a blocker for their Rut. Shockwave was a logical Mech but even that didn't stop the effect of human Hormones on his system. They had been helping him with his test, providing Blood, sweat, skin and saliva samples for Shockwave,  they were polite and worked well with him despite being Autobot Allied. 

Shockwave's usual demeanour was faltering as he found himself in an unfamiliar situation. The effects of the human hormones on his systems were undeniable, stirring up a primal response within him, he had never had much of an issue with his cycle while on Cybertron due to not being around mechs and he could just force himself into more work. 

Shockwave couldn't ignore the way their scent seemed to envelop him, His internal systems buzzed with a need, joints and internal workings clicking and whirling as he busied himself, His logical mind battled against the primal instincts that now had him eager to take a rut mate. The allure of the human's scent, had him venting out in frustration. 

Their eyes flicker to him from their spot. "Is it getting bad?" Shockwave's optic focus in on them, the yellow hue cast a faint light across their skin. "It... it is a challenge," Shockwave admits, his voice strained, he was doing his best to stay focused but the lingering pheromones were making it difficult.  "The effects of your pheromones are proving to be... difficult to ignore."

Despite his best efforts to maintain control over his impulses, Shockwave can feel his old coding crying out with each passing moment. pushing him to the brink of giving in to his most basic instincts. He goes deathly silent as another deep vent of air hits Their skin. 

They take a short moment to process what he had said, eyes lingering on him watching the slight twitch in his frame as he continues to type down the effects. "Shockwave, how long does your rut last?"

"My rut... it can last for several cycles," Shockwave responds, his voice clinical and detached as he tries to maintain his composure. "Does it settle down for a while after you have mated?" They inquire. Shockwave's systems buzz at their question, a slight whine leaves His engine as his helm snaps back to them, optic aglow as he stares. 

" The effects of the rut do tend to subside for a time," Shockwave explains, As he speaks, Shockwave's thoughts swirl with conflicting emotions, where they inquiring out of scientific knowledge, spying for the Autobots or genuine concern for him. 

"So it would be more beneficial for you to have some release so you can continue your work?" 

"That is a logical assessment," Shockwave concedes, his voice betraying a hint of need. He looks away from them as he moves across the lab checking another reading of the test. He contemplates the human's suggestion, Shockwave finds himself torn between his commitment to his scientific pursuits and the primal urges that now threaten to overwhelm him. 

He didn't trust any of the other mechs and he doubted any would agree during the cycle, seeking release as a means of restoring his systems presents a tempting solution, but he did not wish to deal with the bureaucracy of both alliances. But the truth was it was impacting his work.  

“Shockwave, how can I help, I can see your mind working a hundred miles an hour” a soft smile graces their lips. 

 

Shockwave goes stiff, slowly looking over his shoulders at them. He takes a moment debating, "If you are willing to assist in providing a solution to alleviate the effects of my rut, it would involve a mutual agreement." As he speaks, Shockwave's processor analyses each move they make. “I'm willing to help Shockwave” they call back. 

It has the Decepticon scientist stalking towards them, frame vibrating and whining with each movement as he moves to pin them again the desk. 

"Fuck.... your really pent up aren't you?" There is worry in their voice which they try to mask as Shockwave runs a quick analysis. Their eyes nearly bulge when he releases his spike from its interface panel. a wave of relief that washes over him, as heated air leaves his frame. 

"I... I have been neglecting my own needs in pursuit of my work," Shockwave admits, his voice is gravelled and strained. "The effects of my rut have taken their toll.” 

"Can I touch?" Their eyes linger on his spike that slowly weeps Transfluid. his optics flickering with a mix of desire and uncertainty. "Proceed with caution," Shockwave responds. Their hands are rather small but they make a shutter and groan leave Shockwave when they come into contact with his spike. Fingers tracing over the lines and lights as they watch him. 

The sensation of their small hands tracing over the lines and lights of his spike ignites a primal hunger within him, urging him to seek more of their touch. Shockwave growls. 

They yelp as Shockwave roughly presses them onto the lab bench, caging them in underneath him as he looms over them. The slow drag of his spike across their body elicits a whine of need from the human, a sound that only serves to fuel his own primal urges to claim them as his.

"mine to claim," Shockwave growls, his voice low and commanding. As he hovers above the human, Shockwave allows himself to be consumed by the intoxicating smell of their skin, each touch and movement they make as another growl leaving him. As their thighs part to accommodate his movements, the intoxicating sensation of their bodies pressed together driving him to seek more of their touch. A low purr almost echo's from his frame. With slow, rhythmic rutting against them, Shockwave hunched over their smaller body. waves of pleasure ripple through his frame, the transfluid that soaks into their clothing. 

As his normal servo moves to hike up their shirt, discarding It as he studies them. "You are a creature of temptation," Shockwave murmurs, his voice laced with hunger. It's only when his servos Drift further down their body do they let out a loud whine. Shockwave is rather determined with ripping their pants off, only to be hit with an even more potent scent of their arousal, igniting a feral response within him. 

The sight of their exposed skin and the potent scent of their arousal fuel the flames. Spike leaks against them as he begins grinding against them, doing his best not to hurt them. "Please " they call out, shuttering as he drags his spike between their legs slowly teasing it against their sex. Their back arches as one of their hands grab his arm. 

Shockwave's systems hum with a mix of primal satisfaction as they surrender to him, pleading for him, their voice laced with need. The energon in his lines feel like fire. 

Shockwave presses his spike into them, so slowly as to not break them, using all his restraint. Their squeals as he grinds deeper into them their back arches as he rearranges their position.   

They cling to him, nails scratching against his paint. "Shockwave!" They call out. Shockwave feels a surge of satisfaction and arousal wash over him. The slow, deliberate thrusting between them elicits a chorus of moans and pleas, their arching back and collection of whines that fall from their lips has a deep rumble of contentment leave him. cry of his name, "Shockwave!", echoes in the air, a plea that spurs him on. He picks up pace, servo guiding them only his spike. The tight squeeze has him growling as he leans into them. Shockwave allows himself to be consumed by the intoxicating swirl of hormones, despite claiming every inch he physically could. 

Each drag of Shockwave's spike is followed by the symphony of moans and gasps that escape them. Shockwave continues to admire just how much of him they can take, watching each drag as transfluid leaks from their joint bodies. Another cry leaves them as Shockwave's spike begins to swell, locking them together, his Uneven thrust turning into deep grinds, his frame whines and gears grind towards loudly with a deep guttural growl from the Decepticon scientist.

"Shockwave!" The human's breathless cry of his name reverberates through him, The moment he overloads they squeal and squirm under him as he pumps transfluid deep into them. Eagerly rocking into them as his scenes slowly return feeling fulfilled and satisfacted. They twitch and whine even louder as they try to pull away only for Shockwave to roughly thrust into them again to keep them in place. 

“I require you to stay still” His voice sounds breathless as his helm tilts down and rest on the table they are pressed against. Each load of transfluid that is pumped into them, has whines leaving them. Transfluid running down the Junction of their legs. “Too Much” they try to argue only for more of the pink fluid to flood out of them as Shockwave presses deeper. At this rate Shockwave believe he might just have to come to an agreement to keep this human around. 

_________________

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[chamiryokuroi]

I hate copilot (AI tool) so much, personally I think it makes developers lazy and worse at logical thinking.

We are working on an UI application that is mocking service call responses for local testing with the use of MSW.

There were some changes done to the service calls that would require updates on the MSW mocking, but instead of looking at the MSW documentation to figure out how to solve that, my coworker asked copilot.

Did it gave him a code that fixed the issue? Yes, but when I asked my coworker how it fixed it he had no idea because a) he doesn’t know MSW, b) he didn’t know what was the issue to begin with.

I did the MSW configuration myself, I read the documentation and I immediately knew what was needed to fix the issue but I wanted my coworker to do it himself so he would get familiarized with MSW so he could fix issues in the future, instead he used AI to solve something without actually understanding neither the issue or the solution.

And this is exactly why I refuse to use AI/Copilot.

[g0thc0re420]

Manicure: Spock x Reader

Song: Apocalypse - Cigarettes After Sex

CW: MINORS DNI!! smut. from the very beginning it’s just smut. hand fetish (it’s foreplay with a vulcan lol.) oral fixation with fingers (finger sucking, gagging on fingers). breeding kink (but like also trying for a baby) hair pulling. 

Spock might be a little OOC but honestly I stand behind the idea that loves being very touchy with the people he loves and adores the most.

Spock didn’t know what he was expecting when he entered the code to your room, but it certainly wasn’t this. He had seen you many different ways, sick, excited, even naked, but this was different. He scrunched his nose, the smell of nail polish wafting across the room. He saw you, sitting criss-cross in front of your coffee table. You had a row of metal nail instruments and a cleaner sitting in front of you. You were happily singing along to the background music you had on. 

It was one of his favorite things about you, you always seemed to have the right music for any situation. You had even curated a playlist for him for his birthday, Spock listened to it frequently. It took him a moment but he soon recognized the melody flowing into the room. He stood across from you, contentedly watching, trying to not disturb the focus you held on the cuticles of your fingers.

“Kisses on the foreheads of the lovers, wrapped in your arms,” You softly sang as you looked up at him. Noticing his shadow fall over the table. You gently smiled at him, scooting over on the floor to make some room for him, patting the floor next to you.

He sat, forgetting what he was needing to talk to you about, “T’hy’la, might I inquire how your day was?” He felt breathless, watching as you gently started buffing the previous layer of clear polish off. 

“McCoy was more annoying than usual, but other than that I would say my day went pretty well. I was able to start research on testing to see if there is a genetic predisposition for Bendii Syndrome.” You had now moved to shaping your nails, and Spock was watching every movement. “It seems the Vulcan high council is now more set on completely eradicating it. And they chose a human to do it.” A smile Spock had only seen a couple times appeared on your face. You were proud of yourself. This smile had mainly been reserved himself, although Spock was never really sure if he ever deserved it when you looked at him like that.

You were now taking the cleaning solution and cotton balls and wiping the dust from all the filing off your nails. Spock couldn’t keep his eyes off your hands as you inspected your hand, stretching your fingers and humming at your handiwork, “Do you think they look good?”

Spock noticed how his mouth had run dry, he swallowed thickly before flicking his eyes to yours, you were waiting patiently for his response, even wiggling your fingers in the air for a dramatic effect. He watched as your look slowly shifted to one of concern. 

“Spock, are you feeling okay?” You slowly shifted, facing toward him, and Spock finally looked somewhere other than your hands. Noticing the black tank top you were wearing. His eyes falling over your exposed skin, eyeing the intricate details of the tattoos that covered your arms. He felt a very human emotion fill him, and soon he would be showing you just how he was feeling. 

“Spock,” he blinked, looking into your eyes as you snapped, “Are you feeling well? You’re turning green-oh.” He watched as you shifted your weight, finally realizing.

“I promise I am in perfect health my dear. Your hands look great. Please continue.” You nodded sheepishly and he watched as blush creeped over your neck and cheeks, before turning back to the table. Slowly pulling a thin coat of clear polish over your nails, before placing them under a UV light. After a moment or two the timer went off. You wiped them clean once again before placing your hand in front of you.

Spock had been resisting the urge for so long he felt almost robotic as he reached forward and grabbed your hand. Pulling it towards his face as he traced the lines of your fingers. He felt another wave of lust roll through him as he moved behind you, pulling you into his lap, the feeling of his cock straining against his pants was getting to be too much.

You squeaked at the sudden movement, moving around in his lap, Spock let out a soft moan as you pressed against him, just trying to get comfortable. He closed his eyes, letting his hands fall at your hips. He had missed you today. There wasn’t a moment today that either of you could steal away. You had spent all day in back to back Federation meetings and holed away in the research labs. Spock had spent the better part of his day on the surface of a new planet. Finding an interesting micronism, he had a suspicion it was a type of fungi, but as of right now, he wasn’t sure. Right now, he couldn’t focus on anything. 

“Spock,” Your voice was quiet, “I’m finished, do you wanna see them?” He could hear you lightly tap them on the table in front of you. He couldn’t help the way he snaked his hands up your body, before sitting forward, pressing his chest against your back. Gingerly taking your hands into his, he let go of the breath he wasn’t aware he was holding. The way you could make him feel so human, yet so Vulcan at the same time always baffled him. It was the way you truly saw him as who he was. Never comparing either side or trying to push him to either. You always looked at Spock as if he was a complete being.

“They might be the most beautiful hands I’ve ever seen.” He mused aloud as he started playing with your fingers. 

You took a second and adjusted yourself, turning in his lap so your chests pressed each other’s. “I think that might be the highest compliment I could ever receive from you.” You were looking at where your fingers lined with his, a shiver running through you as you inspected the size difference. He watched as you took the opportunity and stole a second for a Vulcan kiss, your fingers almost dancing over his, as if you were nervous to make a move like that. Then, without warning you gently kissed his knuckles. The kiss was barely a whisper, your lips gently grazing over his skin, almost as if you were teasing him. He didn’t miss the way your lips twitched at the corners as a breath caught in his throat. 

“I missed you today. I know Vulcan’s require less sleep, but Spock you were gone before I was awake and I woke up at 0500.” Your thumb works soothing circles on the back of his hand. The love you held for him, washed into him as you pressed your palms together. It clicked for Spock that you had genuinely worried about him today. The light touches and kisses a way of conveying that softness to him. 

“I apologize. My intention was not to worry you. I’ve been working on some interesting research. We found an oceanic micronism in the water testing samples and it’s displaying some interesting characteristics. It may be a certain type of fungi. However, I am not certain-” Spock had noticed the look on your face, he had seen that mischievous look in your eyes before. The time you hid a whoopie cushion in the Captain’s chair. Most recently was when you had hidden lingerie under your uniform and gave Spock a private show in his office. He had no time to react as you kissed the tips of his fingers before pulling a single digit into your mouth. Eyes still holding his gaze. 

He tried to continue, but just as he did, you pulled a second finger to join the first and he didn’t miss the way you lightly grazed your teeth over the tips of his fingers. He could only imagine how he looked, he knew his cheeks were flushed a dark green right now, he watched as you pulled his fingers from your mouth, a small trail of drool still connected to your lips. He had to remind himself to breathe as he moved you off his lap and stood. Standing over you now, he watched as a glint of worry crossed your features. He held out his hand to you, “It would simply be most illogical to partake in coitus anywhere but the bedroom. The carpet would burn your skin.” 

You accepted his hand and with Spock’s help stood, before he had pulled you into his chest again. He needed to have you close at this moment, he had never even wanted to have sex before he met you, and you were intoxicating. You always had been for him, seeming to take the air out of any room you were in. Even now, Spock was following the human tradition of an engagement before he wed you. You wanted a ceremony with your friends and family. Spock would give you that if you wanted it, he would give you Earth if he could, and he hoped he had spent his entire courting you, making sure you knew that. 

Spock led you into the bedroom, trying to control the needs bubbling inside of him. The desire for you feeling like it was trying to claw its way through his chest. Suddenly, you stopped, stepping in front of him and bending down as you silently pulled down the shorts you were lounging in. Your bare ass now bent over in front of him, you slightly shimmied in front of him, just enough for a teasing jiggle . He noticed the absence of underwear in the forming pile on the floor and that was it. What little reserves Spock had left his body. He was behind you in an instant. Pulling your bare ass against his clothed dick, he didn’t miss the way that you pressed yourself back into him, or the sigh that fell from your lips. 

He fumbled for a second with his belt, before weaving his free hand into your hair and shoving you face first into the mattress. He couldn’t stop the growl that rumbled in his chest if he tried. You weren’t even fighting back. “T’hy’la you look pathetic right now.”

You scoffed, managing to turn your head to the side and trying to glare at him from over your shoulder, “Yeah, you say that, but you should take a look-” 

Spock had moved his hand from your hair, and shoved two fingers in your mouth. He closed his eyes as your lips wrapped around his digits, and he took a moment to see just how far he could push you, slowly pushing his fingers further down your throat before pulling out, and restarting at the tortuous pace, pushing further each time. Until tears pricked at the corner of your eyes and you were solely relying on breathing from your nose. You coughed as he pulled his fingers out of your mouth and he softened. Pulling you to him ever so slightly. Guiding you by your chin until you were looking at him. 

Your eyes slightly glazed over and Spock noticed how your skin felt flushed, “I apologize. I should have asked-”

You quickly shook your head, so aggressively you stumbled a little bit, “No,” You were still breathless, “I liked it.” you placed a kiss just under his ear lobe “I trust you.” A second kiss, now on the shell of his ear, “Completely.” 

Your face was in the mattress again as he stepped in between your legs, spreading them slightly until the fit was comfortable for him. He stepped back for a moment, only taking the time to pull himself through the zipper of his pants before coming back to you. His hand once again snaked up the base of your skull, weaving his fingers into your hair, the other one gripping your hip. He took a breath, before slowly starting to push into you. He set his pace slow, wanting to enjoy every second of this moment. He could feel you wiggle slightly under him. Desperate to feel anything more than he was currently giving you.

“Patience my dear. It is a virtue you must learn.” His second thrust was just as slow, he even took a brief pause while he was fully sheathed, slightly bumping his head into the spongy tissue he felt. He reveled in the feeling as you fluttered around him. You wiggled under him and he rolled his eyes, “I expect you to listen to your superior when you’re given an order.”

You froze, he watched the muscles in your thighs tighten as you tried to stiffen as straight as a board, He started again, “Do you understand me Lieutenant?”

You nodded under his hand and he paused again, slowly tightening his fingers in your hair as he lifted your head, “Do I need to repeat myself?”

“No Commander.” The words spilled from your lips and he noticed how swollen they already looked. He was amused by the way he could so easily make you lose all logical sense, just wanting to do anything to make him pleased. He clicked his tongue as he set a quicker pace this time. He pulled you closer to him, the slight whimper from you egging him on even more, his hands moving from your hip to your thigh. Raising your leg until your knee was resting on the bed as well.

The change in angle caused a surprised moan to fall from you and you clenched around him. Spock faltered in his pace for a brief second before he pursued you faster, his thighs now hitting the edge of the bed frame as he felt a familiar tingle starting in the pit of his stomach. The sounds coming from you with every thrust were almost too much for him, between the sound of your skin, and the incoherent babbling he was pulling from your lips it was almost enough to do him in.

He moved his hand from your hair, your head gently falling back into the mattress, as he gently traced the lines of jaw, resting his first two fingers on your temple, and soon, he was basking in the warm golden light that was you. He could feel the love and adoration from you. He could feel something more, just a thought floating around before his own smacked him in the face. A primal urge seemed to fill him as he thought about it.

You, filled to the brim with his seed. You, pregnant, the way your skin would glow, how he would have even more of an excuse to go randomly see you in the middle of the day. You, as a mom, to Spock, it would be no greater than honor than raising a child who had half of what you did.

He couldn’t hold the words, they were falling from his mouth before his brain even registered what he was saying. Jim always said ‘a drunken mind speaks sober thoughts’ and Spock now understood what that meant, in his love drunk state, he had told you one of his deepest desires, from the moment he had met you. His hand fell to your chin, resting his hand under your jaw to keep you supported, “Do you want a baby?”

Your hips stuttered for a split second, and Spock panicked. He felt his heart squeeze in an uncomfortable way, his lungs felt heavy, “Yes Commander.”

“Do you want my baby?” He needed clarification, he needed to know you wanted this.

Your eyes fluttered open, taking a deep breath, trying to steady your breathing, “Yes Spock. I want to have your baby.” 

Spock was done for. He found your temple once again as he reached the edge, holding on to anything for just a second longer, before you were there with him. He let himself fall, moving his hand from your thigh to your midsection, pulling your body further against him. He gently worked you down, never stopping, only slowly in his languid motions in and out of you. He stayed in you, until your breathing slowed down and until, all, parts of you relaxed. 

He slowly pulled away, before working on you, helping you move further up on the bed. Making sure you were comfortable with a pillow. He was gone as soon as you were settled, returning moments later with a glass of water and a warm washcloth. “Please, drink my dear.” He wiped you down from head to toe. Starting with your face, he gently wiped the tear streaks, before noticing how dry your lips were. He placed a very human kiss on them, almost as if he were trying to kiss them better.

 There were bruises forming where he held your jaw. He could feel the slight furrow in his brows. Your hand graced his cheek, he looked in your eyes for the first time and he swore he could see the love he felt from you earlier, had you always looked at him like that? “Stop worrying. I liked it, and I like the bruises.” You gently trailed off again, eyes dropping from his gaze. Spock couldn’t believe you were shy about admitting this to him with everything that just happened between the two of you. 

He had now moved on to your chest and arms. Moving in steady even motions across your skin.“I know I can be…forceful. I do not wish to inflict any-” He stopped as you held your hand up.

“Spock, I need you to understand that I wanted everything you did to me done. I promise, I will let you know if you ever take it too far, but maybe we could benefit from having this as a bigger conversation tomorrow.” He has now moved to your hips, taking extra care around the where he once gripped you. “I think it would be great to establish boundaries so there are preset guidelines for any type of sex we have.”

He was now wiping down your thighs and legs, letting the words you spoke process as he inspected your body. He was amazed at how you always seemed to find a way to find a solution that benefited everyone, “I think your idea sounds very logical. It would benefit in the enjoyment for both of us.”

“Yes! Exactly!” You lazily smiled at him as you crawled under the blankets, “Now, I know with as much as you love me, Vulcans need time to process things. But you are Spock, and you did a lot of things tonight ruled by your emotions. I know that takes a toll on you.” You opened your arms, and he willingly fell into them, letting all of his weight on you as he took what seemed like his first steady breath of the night. 

He couldn’t help but press his head further into your touch as you gently ran your fingers through his hair, your nails every so gently grazing his scalp, he felt his skin tingle after you, you continued speaking, you voice quieter now, “You need to go shower, you’re still in your uniform. Take a moment for you, I’ll be here when you come back.”

You were laying on your stomach when Spock entered the room again, his hair still slightly damp, he may have rushed his routine just to be by your side again. He thought you were sleeping, until he heard your voice call out into the darkness, “Computer, play ‘Apocalypse’ by Cigarettes After Sex, year 2017.”

Spock recognized the tune immediately, the same song all of this had started with, as he crawled into the bed beside you, within a breath you had pressed yourself into his side, your head finding solace in the crook of your neck. He could feel his skin prick as your breath fanned across his skin. Your hand quickly found his as you laced your fingers together.

“I was being serious earlier. About wanting to have your baby.” Your voice is just barely a whisper as you speak in the darkness of the room.

“As was I. I feel it would be my greatest honor to raise a family with you,” he gently rolled, so he was able to look at you, his free hand gently cupping your face, “I want to be with you for the rest of my life.”

“I cannot wait to marry you.” You closed your eyes as you spoke those words and Spock knew he would spend the rest of his life making sure you spent every moment knowing how much he truly loved you. 

He didn’t even care when he instinctively pressed a chaste kiss to your forehead. “Sleep well T’hy’la. I will be here when you wake.” Spock knew his life was now changing, forever. There was no going back, yet also not an ounce of doubt arose from his decision. As your breathing slowed, subconsciously falling into rhythm with his. He slowly closed his eyes, letting everything else but the current need for sleep fall to the wayside. Sinking lower into the feeling, Spock realized, if you liked the bruises, the next time you put on a show for him like that, he wouldn’t wait to make it to the bedroom.

[vcqrupvt]

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[alwaysshallow]

why is johnny lowkey ‘when you best friend treats you better than your boyfriend so you end up having a baby by him’ coded

JABHBHARJ HIGHKEY!!! HIGHKEYYYY.

soap stirs the drama between you and your boyfriend just to have you closer to him. like, he can't have his favorite girl with someone who isn't worthy of her, right? he's just thoughtful.

he's all like "awh, he doesn't deserve you, baby" when you whine to him about problems in your relationship; and that's your first mistake here lol. soap's eyes glimmer every time you mention problems because in his mind? he's solution to all of them.

you're sad because your boyfriend said/did something? he's gonna make you laugh. he's gonna watch romcoms with you, noting all the behaviors you like in men. what flowers you like. color. he knows it.

you once sleep with him, completely drunk, and you're absolutely ashamed of what you've done; for half an hour, maybe even more, you apologize to him:(( you're so!! so!! sorry.

except he's not LMAO and he smiles like an idiot because he got you. he coos something about being okay and how it doesn't affect anything because you know each other so so well. like, you don't even have to tell your boyfriend about that! it's between you two! it was once.

except, he lures you into having sex with him again; problems with your boyfriend, only increasing with time, makes you agree to that. you even agree to all non-condom policy because he promises to pull out, but he doesn't do that. instead, your legs are on his shoulder, and he ruts deep into you, growling something about making you a mom.

well, you shouldn't really be surprised when you see two lines on a pregnancy test, right? and you shouldn't be surprised when he's all happy about it, such a contrast to you, frightened what's gonna come.