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thesentientmango · 4 years

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Tradition

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Summary: Roman and Remus catch up with their uncles and hear a new story about their dads childhood.

Series: Remus, Roman and Chaos from Childhood

Ship(s): Logicality, queerplatonic Anxceit, Creativitwins

A/N: A huge thank you to the people in the TSS Fanworks Collective discord for brainstorming this AU with me and my two awesome betas for this fic @itsadastraperaspera and @extraordinarycorn (same names on both AO3 and tumblr!)

Translation: bisabuela- great grandmother

~~~

“Boys! Dinner!”

“Coming!” Roman yelled back to his dad before promptly kicking the headphones off of Remus’s ears.

“Oi!” Remus said as he swat at Roman. “Watch where you put your feet!”

“Parde called!” Roman said as he dodged Remus before smiling innocently at him. “I was just making sure you knew!”

Remus rolled his eyes and chucked his headphones on the bed. “Whatever, I would have come regardless.”

“Was that… gratitude?” Roman gasped, “Oh my- I thought I’d never live to see the day.”

Remus faked a gag as he subtly inched in front of Roman on their way towards the stairs. “I wouldn't get used to it. Race you!”

Remus sprinted down the stairs, taking them two at a time, leaving Roman to flounder behind him.

“No fair!” Roman cried, “you had a head start!”

Roman sprinted down the stairs after Remus, not sparing a second glance to the dozens of photos that covered the walls. There were old ones, from when the twins were babies, and older ones still from major events in their dads' lives, their wedding, college graduation, family reunions, birthdays; some of the pictures held faces Roman had never met, but many of them were filled with familiar faces. The ones Roman liked the most were the ones he could remember.

A picture of his bisabuela’s ninetieth birthday. He remembered Dad behind the camera trying to make sure everyone was in frame. He could still practically feel Papa’s hand squeezing his shoulder as Roman grinned towards the camera. Roman had lost two teeth the day before, his smile was wide and the holes were in full display.

A picture of Uncle Janus helping him pick out what to wear to his first piano recital— Roman had been so nervous he didn’t even register Papa with the camera until the shutter clicked.

A picture of Roman and Remus both covered in mud as they proudly presented the frogs they’d caught to the camera. Their dad, who’d helped them catch them, was smiling along with his sons, pride and exhaustion in his eyes. Roman had named his frog, Frog. Names have never been his strong suit.

A picture of Uncle Virgil singing karaoke at a small restaurant he’d taken Roman and Remus to when he was babysitting them a few years ago. They’d dared him to, and Virgil had been reluctant, but thinking back on it Roman thought he probably only did that so he could barter a deal of what they would do if he did it, because when Virgil got up there he shone as though he'd been waiting to get up there all night. Roman remembered the exact note when his attitude changed from amusement to awe.

A picture of Roman and Remus working with wood for the first time, they’d built a rickety bird house. Remus almost cut his finger off, and they never put it up because it looked too dangerous for the birds, but it had been so much fun. That was truly the gateway project to what they could do now with some wood, saws, and an afternoon.

Roman finished running down the stairs and quickly rounded the corner to the dining room and immediately grinned at who he saw, “You’re back!”

Janus and Virgil looked over from where they were being squeezed half to death by Remus. Janus waved, “Roman! Please tell me it has actually just been two weeks since we last saw you, he’s acting like we died.”

Roman snorted and ran over to join the hug. “Yeah, but two weeks is a long time!”

“Especially without our favorite uncles!” Remus added.

Janus ruffled Remus’s hair playfully. “We’re not even your uncles!”

“Yes you are!” The twins chorused.

Virgil looked at Janus, amused. “I mean come on Jan, at this point you might as well give in for good—or are you going to try and deny it for another sixteen years?”

Janus sighed dramatically and, not for the first time, said, “Alright fine, I give in! I’m your uncle.”

The twins cheered, like they did everytime Janus begrudgingly accepted he was in fact, their uncle. Janus and Virgil might not be biologically related to them, but Roman and Remus had quite literally known them their entire lives and they were just as family as their dads. And of course Janus knew that. Despite the jokes, if anyone outside of the family questioned his or anyone else’s place in the family, well Janus wasn’t exactly one for passive action.

“Did Janus decide he wasn’t your uncle again?” Patton asked as he walked into the kitchen area of the dining room and began to take pots off the stove.

“As is tradition!” Roman said.

“Well if you’re such a traditionalist, go wash up and set the table!” Remus snorted as Roman groaned, but Patton just pointed a spoon at Remus. “What are you laughing at?" he admonished. "Go wash your hands, we have guests, you’re helping.”

“They don’t count as guests,” Remus groaned as he followed Roman to the sink. “They’re family!”

“Well family helps family and I’m sure you're hungry, it’ll go faster with two of you!”

Pops was right, he always was about this type of thing, right as they finished setting the table the front door swung open and their Dad stepped in. He didn’t look into the kitchen and just called, “I’m home!”

“Come over here!” Patton called, “I have a surprise!”

“Is it whatever that wonderful smell is because if so-” Logan walked into the kitchen and his gaze immediately softened upon seeing Virgil and Janus, “-oh. Welcome home.”

“You’re such a softy L, get over here,” Virgil said as he extended an arm for a hug.

“And I thought I missed them!” Remus chirped.

Roman jabbed Remus with his elbow, “Shut it! They’re having a moment!”

Logan laughed slightly and pulled back from the hug. “How did it go?” He asked the pair.

“As well as it could have,” Janus responded. “And of course we haven’t had a chance to head home yet, Patton was kind enough to pick us up, so that’s why our luggage is in your living room.”

Roman, Remus, and Logan all peeked into the room curiously, “So it is,” Logan said. “Well, I’m sure we can drive you home when all is said and done.”

“If the house isn’t destroyed,” Virgil mumbled as Patton walked over with several pans of food.

“Oh I’m sure you turned the stove off!” Patton said, smiling at Virgil. “We’d have heard if it went up in flames!”

“More of a… figurative destroyed, but thanks Pat.”

“What does that-” Patton cut himself off when a very loud stomach grumble made its way through the room. Everyone looked over at the twins who were pointing at each other.

“It was Remus!”

“You liar! It was you!”

“Kids!” Logan said as he gestured towards the table. “Does it matter? Sit down, I think it’s time to eat.”

No one even thought about protesting. Roman shuffled into the bench and sat down as Patton placed a plate of food in front of him. “Thanks Padre.”

Remus, who had followed him onto the bench, sat down and smiled when Patton handed him his food. “Thank you Pops!”

Once everyone got their food and started eating, Janus began to recount a weird experience they had on the flight home.

“And then this white suburban mom asked if we were boyfriends— which is a completely reasonable question, don’t get me wrong, but when we said no she got really annoyed at us which, first off, is ridiculous because we don’t owe you anything, and second, you’re sitting in front of us on a plane with your noisy kid, so if anything you owe us something. And then she said, ‘Well if you aren’t brothers and you aren’t boyfriends, what are you?’ Like she completely forgot friends were a thing?”

“I mean, be kind, Janus,” Virgil said. “She was just confused because she’s never had any friends.”

Laugher sprung up from various points around the table, and Patton shook his head with a smile. “Vee, don't be mean! Give her the benefit of the doubt maybe she just forgot! Slip of the mind, she was probably focusing on her kid!”

Virgil raised an eyebrow, “Uh-huh, then why ask in the first place? It’s not like we wanted to answer prying questions about our relationship. Especially not on a plane.”

Virgil’s eyes lit up. “How much do you think her brain would have exploded if I had told her about queerplatonic relationships?”

“Oh, fully,” Janus said immediately. “If one can’t picture a relationship besides boyfriends and brothers, QPRs are brain surgery.”

“Odd metaphor and phrasing,” Logan said, “but I suppose it was an odd situation. What did you say?”

“We, luckily, didn’t have to say anything,” Virgil said. “A flight attendant came round asking her to put on her seatbelt and we were rescued by take off.”

“So where did you go?” Remus asked, his mouth half full of food, “I mean you still haven’t told us about your actual trip!”

“Oh-” Janus said as Virgil glanced at him, “Well, we went to visit some friends of ours. We didn’t do much.”

“Bo~ring!”

“Yeah you leave for two weeks and you don’t do anything?” Roman huffed. “I missed you for two whole weeks and you weren’t even out there living high and mighty! Ridiculous.”

Before Virgil or Janus could respond, Logan cut in gently, “Oh any note, Patton, how’s your new project coming along?”

“Project?” Virgil asked.

Patton’s eyes lit up. “Yes! I’ve been writing some music again! I remember why we liked it so much, it’s very cathartic.”

“I’m sure it's much better than ours were back in the day,” Janus said with a smile.

“Oh come on Janus, give us some credit,” Virgil said. “I mean we had some pretty killer songs.”

All four of the adults around the table laughed.

“Oh my god, I’d almost forgotten about that!” Patton said.

“Well I hadn’t!” Logan said, and the table burst into laughter again.

Roman looked over at Remus, who looked just as confused as he did.

Virgil glanced over at the twins and smiled. “Oh, I think it might be storytime, guys.”

Logan laughed, “Probably, but I shouldn’t tell it because well, you know.”

Roman and Remus were vibrating with excitement by the time they decided Virgil would tell the story.

“Okay so-”

“Wait! You gotta do the thing!”

“Tradition~!” Roman sang.

Virgil grinned, “Right.” He cleared his throat before bringing his hands up like a curtain and announcing, “Storytime!”

“So…” Virgil started, “We were working out a new song of ours in Patton’s garage.”

“I’m thinking instead we could go for a minor 7th here,” Virgil said as he played the chord.

“Minor 7th? Wow, getting fancy Vee,” Janus said, smiling and showing off the braces that were attempting to shackle his teeth into place.

“Yeah, I thought I’d bring out the big guns now, show you what I’m made of? The past three years have actually just been an elaborate scheme to lower your expectations of me.”

Logan snorted, “Don’t give Janus any ideas. You know he’d commit to that.”

Patton walked back into the garage with four water bottles, “Okay! Water for you, water for you, water for you,” Patton said, tossing the bottles at his friends, “and water for me!”

Logan fumbled the bottle and it rolled under a shelf. “Whatever,” he mumbled, picking up his drumsticks. “Everyone ready?”

Patton nodded as he wiped his mouth, picked up his bass guitar, and positioned himself by the microphone. “Yep!”

Janus strummed his guitar. “Seems like it.”

“I’m set,” Virgil said as he put down his half empty water bottle and nodded at Logan. “What song are we playing?”

“Pick up again at Killer?” Patton suggested.

“Sounds good to me. Count us in L?”

Logan nodded, “1-2- and a 1-2-3-”

The garage burst to life.

After an intro which went on far too long, Patton stepped a little closer to the mic…

“And I just- I completely forgot the lyrics of the song!” Virgil obviously lied, and the twins groaned. “I’ll just skip ahead. So at the climax of the song, everything was building, and as Patton sang the final lyric to top out the climax…”

“And you're just my killer!” Patton sang.

Logan’s head bobbed and collided with the drum set in a cacophony of random sounds.

Virgil looked over—that wasn’t a part of the song— to see Logan face first on the drums, unconscious.

“Logan?” Virgil stopped playing and rushed over to his friend. “Holy shit, did he just fucking die?”

Janus and Patton both now noticed what was going on. Patton gasped and he slapped a hand over his mouth, “Oh my god! Should I go see if an adult is home? Is he breathing? Do we need to call an ambulance?”

As Virgil and Patton freaked out, Janus took it upon himself to check Logan for a pulse. “Hey fuckers!” Janus said. “He’s alive. He just fainted or something.”

Virgil made a face, “Oh.”

Janus raised an eyebrow, “Don’t look so disappointed, Virgil.”

Just then Logan groaned as he began to regain consciousness. “Ugh- what... happened?”

“You fainted,” Janus said. “Uh, we should probably call your dad, right? Like so he can make sure you're not actually dying.”

“Mm- probably dehydrated, but yeah.” Logan rubbed his head, “I’m gonna have a killer headache.”

“I thought you were dead!” Patton said as he flung himself at a still very disoriented Logan. “You’re never allowed to do that ever again!”

“I’m not sure that I have much control-”

Virgil shoved his water bottle at Logan as Patton pulled away from the hug. “Shut up and drink something, where did yours go?”

Logan gestured vaguely around as he struggled to unscrew the top of Virgil’s water with shaky hands. “I dropped it?”

“Idiot,” Janus said fondly. “Do you want me to call your dad now?”

Logan nodded as Virgil took the water back and unscrewed the cap. “Yes, thank you.”

Virgil handed the open water to him, “You’re not allowed to scare us like that again.”

“You keep saying that,” Logan said as he drank the water, “but I’m not sure how much control I have over you thinking I’m dead.”

“He did WHAT?!”

Janus was holding his phone about an arms length away from his head as Logan’s dad’s voice came loud and clear through his phone.

“He fainted Mr. Berry,” Janus called through the phone. “But he’s awake now?”

“Thank you Janus. Could you put him on?”

Janus held it out and Logan winced and took it, “Hi Dad.”

“Logan? Are you okay? Did you hit your head?”

“Yes, but I’m fine, relatively speaking.”

“You did hit your head?”

“...uh, yes,” Logan said hesitantly

“Okay, I’m coming to pick you up. What did you hit your head on? How many fingers am I holding up?”

“The drum set, and... I can’t see you. We’re over the phone.”

Logan could hear the smile in his dad’s voice as he said, “You've still got your head on your shoulders, that's good.”

“In all fairness, it made a very funny sound, sir!” Patton called. “I thought Logan was trying to improv!”

Logan’s dad laughed, “Well at least it wasn’t the floor, drums have a little give to them. Have you drunk water?”

“Yeah, I just did.”

“Well, drink a little more. I’ll be there in ten. You boys keep an eye on him, make sure he doesn't try to play any more drums with his head!”

“Will do!” Patton responded.

“Alright. I love you Logan, see you soon.”

“Love you too Dad.”

Logan hung up and handed the phone back over to Janus. “I can’t believe I fainted. You all are never going to let me live this down, are you?”

“Of course not, Mr. We-All-Need-To-Drink-Enough-Water-During-Summer,” Janus mocked. “Impeccable timing though, right at the climax of the song.”

Logan shrugged and rubbed his head. “Yeah yeah. You have full permission to bug me about drinking water for a while.”

“Oh, you shouldn't give us that much autonomy,” Janus said with a wink. “It’ll be years before you can talk to us without shoving water in your face.”

“Wait-” Roman interjected, “so Dad, was it actually years before they stopped bugging you?”

“Fortunately no,” Logan said, “Our focus shifted to graduation and college and people forgot.”

“Well, I never forgot. How could I? My little teenage brain thought you were dead,” Virgil said. “I was just biding my time. I got a little distracted after…” Virgil shot a look at Patton and grinned. “Well that’s another story.”

“Did you actually think he was dead?” Remus asked.

“Like a little bit!” Patton said. “I mean, it was a high tension moment.”

Roman looked at Logan. “How did it feel to faint? Did you see stars?”

“Yes, it was unpleasant, and you should hope it doesn’t ever happen to you,” Logan glanced at Remus. “Either of you.”

“Aw, so I can’t do a dramatic recreation of this story?” Remus whined.

“Absolutely not!” All the adults chorused.

The family fell into comfortable conversation as everyone caught up with one another, talking long into the night.

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willowkeyes-creates · 4 years

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Roman’s Eight-Armed Guide (Part One)

Part One of an Animal Soulmates AU. I liked the idea of Soulmates that weren’t romantic/qpr and I liked making Roman cry. I tried out 3rd person for this as well so if it’s a little weirdly worded, it’s because I’m more practised in 1st person. Part two will be in 1st person because this was hard.

Pairings: Platonic Moxiety, Platonic Creativitwins, Eventual Roceit

Warnings: Parental neglect, harsh parenting, Roman’s parents just suck, crying

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The first time Roman saw it, he was barely old enough to understand what it was. Everyone around him had always said to watch for animals that were translucent and faintly glowed your other half's favourite colour. So that night, with him crying after his parents berated him and locked him in his room without dinner for drawing on the walls, his cries faded as he watched the see-through baby octopus roll around his bedroom floor without a care in the world.

He fell asleep with the octopus, which was small enough to fit in his chubby hands, laying on his chest and comforting him for the night.

Roman had been glad to know that the first time wasn’t a dream after meeting the octopus again when he had gotten lost after a school performance. His father couldn’t make it to the performance itself, but he did promise to pick him up afterwards. So little Roman, still in his Peter Pan outfit, went searching through the crowd for over an hour before his exhaustion and the stress of the night caught up with him and made him tear up.

The only reason he didn’t cry was because the octopus scared him; having fallen from seemingly nowhere and landing on his shoulders with more weight then he remembered the creature having. Which made sense when he thought about it, as its head was almost as large as his own now. It gave him a loose hug around the chest, even weirdly purr-chirping into his neck before dragging his attention to a nearby chair. His father wouldn’t come for another hour, long after the majority of students were gone and without any sort of apology, but the slimy animal stayed by his side until he was finally in the car.

He saw it again on the first day of high school. Roman felt lost within the sea of endless students, not knowing where to go for his first class despite having the map of the school in his free hand. A faint green glow drew his attention to another student; a boy hiding his face underneath a hood that watched everyone go by with disinterest, unaware of the octopus on top of the lockers beside him attempting to swipe the hoodie off with two of its tentacles despite the fact that it would just go straight through him.

So Roman took it as a sign to talk with the boy, who introduced himself with hesitance and the name Aurora, and thanked his Soulmate’s animal for leading him to his first real friend. Who had quickly re-introduced himself as Janus after Roman wouldn’t stop calling him ‘Snakeskin Beauty’, ‘The True King of the Pride Lands’, ‘Pretty Slightly-Taller-Than-Me Liar’ to help him like the burn scars on the side of his face and his lying habit; even if it was a little more then he used to. He didn’t stop as Janus seemed to enjoy the compliments, and Roman was glad to learn his real name. It suited him better then Aurora as he wasn’t one to go around poking needles or piss off any revenge-seeking sorceresses.

After meeting Janus, he didn’t see the octopus for a long time. He found out that his parents were neglecting him while also using his status as an accomplished theatre kid to make them popular with other parents. He also learnt that he was very gay- and even more gay when it came to his very sassy best friend. Which his other friends, platonic soulmates Virgil and Patton, constantly told him to confess to but his fear of losing Janus always got the better of him.

He finished school with the grades he wanted and even a scholarship to continue his acting career, with Janus managing to get just the right grades to pursue law like he wanted. They got a small apartment together, luckily in walking distance of Patton and Virgil’s one, and the three of them got to help him pack for his life away from his parents.

“Will you visit?”

“Make sure to remember us when you’re famous, Roman.”

“Don’t slack off just because you’re not with us anymore!”

He bared through it all until the both of them decided to go out for dinner while everyone continued to pack. Virgil managed, through some bickering, to convince Roman to take a break as they only have a few things left to pack and he looked tired after having to deal with his parents.

“It’s not like you didn’t sleep at all last night…”

“Thank you for reminding me how tired I am, Handsome Dent.”

“You’re very welcome. And nice try on the nickname, but I’ve heard better.”

They promised to let him take the last two boxes to the car but until then, he agreed to take a break. He tried his best, but with each minute that passed his stomach would gain a new knot in it until he had to stand to try and wiggle out the unsettling feeling that came from seemingly nowhere. Something in him was saying that something was wrong, out of place, that he was forgetting something important, but Janus and Virgil had double checked to make sure that Roman wouldn’t have to return to the house after tonight.

“What’s with you?” Virgil was the one to stop his pacing with a worried frown and by putting everyone’s attention back onto him. “We said relax, not get all antsy.”

“I don’t know what’s wrong, but something is! I just don’t know what-” He locked eyes with something only he could see, which made him all the more uncomfortable. If the octopus was there, then his gut feeling was right.

He stepped around a worried Patton, muttering about the octopus that the three had been told about years prior, and followed it as it tucked itself up into a ball and rolled through his parents bedroom door with a small puff of green smoke. He’s never been allowed inside of his parents room, he’s been yelled at enough times to know this by now, but he had twist the doorknob and trusted that his Soulmate’s animal would keep it from happening again.

His friends all stood behind him as he walked inside, finding the octopus sitting beside a drawer with its key in its keyhole. The octopus climbed up his arm to become a comfortable weight on his back as he opened it and pulled out the document that sat on top of a stack of others.

‘Certificate Of Adoption’ ‘Roman Morgan Aurelian’

His heart sank further than he thought was possible as he stared at it; ignoring the questions his friends were asking him from the doorway. His hands shook as he struggled to hold the paper. He could hear his heartbeat as if it were an echoing drum in his head. His blood boiled at remembering all the times his ‘parents’ had told him to be thankful that he was the child of two well-earning parents.

A cold, and slightly slimy, tentacle to his face snapped him out of his building anger to continue searching through the drawer. There were open letters, all addressed to him and all signed by someone named ‘Remus’. There were maybe over fifty letters in the pile, with a few more scattered inside of the drawers with stamps originating from all over the country.

Glancing over one of the open ones, he feels the octopus on his shoulders hold him just a little tighter as each word had taken a blow to his heart.

‘My twin’.

‘Not allowed to visit’.

‘How is he?’

‘Want to meet’.

“Roman..?” His hand instinctively reached up to gently hold one of the tentacles, ignoring it’s sliminess for the small bit of comfort that it brought as Janus entered his vision. “What’s wrong?”

“I… Just…” With a sniffle, he handed over all of the papers to him before shifting the octopus so that he could hug something. To the others it’d look like he’s hugging air, but he didn’t care as the octopus has never failed to comfort him before.

Moments later, he’s pulled into a hug right there on the floor. It’s tight and comforting and warm and he knows that it's Janus. Voices mixed with the sound of his heartbeat deafened Roman to his friends' questions, but when a pair of hands set themselves onto his knees and a third rubbed his back, the taste of salty tears reached his lips as he began to sob.

As he held onto the octopus and cried, he knew that his Soulmate was strange and yet would be there for him. He never thought that it’d be a twin brother; and one that had been looking for him for so long as well? The thought never crossed his mind. He blamed his parents.

His name -Remus sounded so perfect- even came from Rome’s origin story and Roman doesn’t know why that brought a small, sad smile to his lips. He cried into Janus’ shoulder and asked him if they could leave before his parents returned. They’ve done nothing but use his dedication to theatre, his grades during school, his… everything to make themselves . He was off to college and not once did he ever hear about being adopted or having a twin. Roman never wanted to see them again; even after he found Remus.

And with Janus’ help, he didn’t ever have an in-person conversation with them again.

#roman sanders #remus sanders #janus sanders #virgil sanders #patton sanders #creativitwins #eventual roceit #background platonic soulmates moxiety #soulmate au #animal soulmate au #octopus #part one of two #ask to tag #willowkeyes writes

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iclaimedtobethebetterbard · 4 years

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it was always you (falling for me) - chapter 2

Fandom: Sanders Sides Characters: All the sides Rating: Teen & up (for swearing) Relationships: Prinxiety, Moceit, and QPR Intrulogical (eventually this will develop into Intrulosleep!) Warnings: Language; Remus being Remus; Shakespeare fans will probably hate my interpretation(s) of the plays I reference here, if the English major friend I showed this to is anything to go by, and I’m very sorry about that 😂 Word Count: 9042

Read on AO3!

My writing masterpost

start - previous - here - next - masterpost

Summary: In a world where you and your soulmate swap dreams once a month, seven young adults enter the same college as freshmen. Each of them is wondering when they’ll find their soulmate and what that will mean for them.

Notes: Secret Santa gift for sanders-sides-fics!

Chapter 2

Roman had a problem. A person-shaped problem. Specifically, a problem shaped like his brother’s excessively pretty roommate, who seemed to take pleasure exclusively in needling Roman every chance they got.

Roman groaned, burying his face in one of the pillows on his bed.

“Hm?” his roommate, Patton, said sympathetically.

“I swear Virgil has, like, an agenda against soulmates, or something,” Roman said, rolling over and staring despairingly at the ceiling.

“Now, kiddo, I’m sure that’s not true.”

Roman lifted his head to look at Patton. “Aren’t I older than you?”

“Only by a few months,” Patton said serenely. “Spiritually, you’re my kiddo.”

“Pat, that makes no sense.”

Patton blinked up at him with a too-innocent face. “If it feels dad to you, just don’t think about it any father.”

“Oh my god.”

Patton giggled, a noise of pure delight, then circled back to Roman’s original topic. “What makes you think he’s got something against soulmates?”

“Uh, the way ze rails against them at every opportunity, for a start?” Roman sat up. “We have argued five times in the last two weeks about soulmates, and only three of them were even about Shakespeare like usual!”

“Haven’t you only known Virgil for, like, three weeks?”

“Well, yes, but that’s not the point.” Roman climbed down the ladder to the ground. “Also, I feel like that makes it worse?”

“Hmm, maybe.” Patton seemed amused. “You talk about them a lot, you know?”

“He’s so annoying!” Roman said defensively. “Ze gets this stupid smirk like ze knows something I don’t and he doesn’t even seem to care about constructing sound arguments half the time!” He put his laptop into his backpack.

“Going somewhere?” Patton asked.

“Yeah, Virgil and Remus invited me over to their dorm to study.”

“Oh,” Patton said, a funny sort of look on his face like he was trying not to laugh.

“What?” Roman asked.

“Nothing, nothing.” Patton waved him away, still smiling to himself. “Have fun studying with Virgil.”

“I will,” Roman said brightly, heading out the door.

***

“I want to go get ice cream,” Remus announced suddenly, hopping to his feet. “Who’s coming with?” It was late, almost midnight, and Roman was sitting on the floor in what had been a nice triangle with Remus and Virgil until Remus had stood. The three of them had been alternately working on homework and arguing about Disney characters.

“Sure,” Virgil said with a shrug, tugging their hoodie up onto their shoulders—they’d been wearing it dangling off their body, with only their wrists in the sleeves holding it on. “Let me fix my eyeliner first, though.”

Remus nodded distractedly, looking around the room and turning in a circle.

“Whatcha looking for?” Roman inquired, getting to his feet as well.

“My wallet,” Remus said, gaze still roving around. “I don’t know where I—”

“By your chapstick,” Roman said.

“Ah!” Remus dove under his desk, scrabbled on the floor, and emerged with his wallet clutched triumphantly in one hand and his chapstick in the other. “Thank you.”

“How the fuck did you know that?” Virgil asked, turning away from the mirror hung on the door with their eyeliner in their hand. They’d reapplied it to one eye, in a perfect, pointed wing; the other eye still had the only slightly less perfect, barely faded wing they’d been wearing this whole time. It matched their black lipstick and the carefully blended eyeshadow on their upper eyelids.

“He put it down there when he was telling the story about trying to collect dried gum off the street,” Roman explained. “And the chapstick was already there right next to it. So that’s how I remembered.”

Remus nodded. “I would have gotten there in a minute, probably,” he agreed.

“I still don’t understand how the fuck you knew that, but good for y’all, I guess,” Virgil said, turning back to the mirror.

“ADHD solidarity,” Roman explained.

Remus made finger guns at him, nodding. “ADHD solidarity,” he agreed.

Virgil paused halfway through drawing the other wing on. “Oh, that makes sense.” They picked up the line again, their hand perfectly steady, drawing it out to a fine point. “I thought you said you were autistic?” they added after a moment, their face holding perfectly still as they filled in the eyeliner with a practiced hand; their monolid eyelids allowed them to draw the wings of their eyeliner wide and dramatic.

“Yeah, I’m both. There are high rates of comorbidity, and also they’re both genetic, so neurodivergence runs in families,” Roman explained, the sentence rolling out of his mouth without him stumbling over the words once or having to think about it at all. “Did you know about ten percent of the population is probably ADHD?” he went on eagerly. “It’s super underdiagnosed. Especially because of race and gender biases in doctors who diagnose it, and the misconception that it’s only something children have. I only got diagnosed because Remus did when we were little, and we’re twins, so then they tested me too. Even though we aren’t identical. It’s super frequent for identical twins to both have ADHD if one of them has it, though.” Roman bounced on the balls of his feet, tapping the tip of his finger against his thumb. “I wish we were identical, I think it’d be so funny. Like, impersonating each other, and things. We could make such good video skits.”

“We make fantastic video skits already,” Remus protested.

“Okay, fair. But you know what I mean. And we could switch places for a day and see who noticed. All the stuff twins do in stories. Twins are always identical in stories, it’s so annoying, I wish there were more stories with fraternal twins.” Roman paused for a second, his mind hovering for an instant between a not-fully-realized train of thought about the gender politics of twin representation in stories and the question of what animals were most likely to have twins. He chose, almost before he was aware there was a choice, the animals question, his emotions nudging him away from the energy talking about gender representation would take up. “Do you think kittens dream?” he asked, only a second or two after he’d stopped talking in the first place.

“Yeah, probably,” Remus responded without missing a beat, likely following his train of thought. “Better question, do other animals have soulbonds, and how do they know if so?”

“Maybe it’s a scent thing,” Roman said thoughtfully.

“Ooh, like with glands or some shit?” Remus looked thoughtful. “That could make sense. I wonder—I bet there’s answers on the internet. I’m going to look this up later. Are you coming, too, by the way? To get ice cream?”

Roman thought it over. “Sure,” he agreed.

“I’m ready,” Virgil announced, capping their eyeliner and setting it down on hir desk. “Also, I got whiplash about five times just listening to that conversation.”

“Good, my chaos is overtaking another victim and soon I shall rule the world. Let’s go!” Remus led the other two out the door and started walking towards the end of campus.

“Where are we going, exactly?” Roman inquired, shoving his hands into the pockets of his red letterman jacket to keep them warm.

“There’s an ice cream shop that’s open till one in the morning about ten minutes away walking,” Remus said over his shoulder. “Logan and I found it the first weekend here.”

“You two went in search of sweets without me?” Roman put a hand to his heart. “I’m hurt,” he declared in his most dramatic voice.

“Oh, shut up, we would have gotten around to telling you about it eventually. I mean, I’m telling you right now, so.” Remus shrugged. “Virge, aren’t you cold?”

“Yeah, but I’m pretty, so it’s worth it,” Virgil said, tossing their head so the long hair on the top of their undercut swished. They were wearing a distressed band tee and a black skater skirt over fishnet leggings and a pair of doc martens. It was quite chilly out, and even though they were wearing a hoodie too, Roman understood why Remus had been concerned.

“You are very pretty,” Roman told them seriously. Even aside from their clearly carefully chosen outfit, this was true. Their eyes were round and curious and a captivating shade of dark brown. Even with the boost from the platform of the shoes they were wearing, they were tiny. Roman was sure they couldn’t be more than 5’2” without the boots. The hair on top of their undercut was very long, almost down to their waist, contrasting with the closely-shaved back and sides of their head. About six inches on the ends of their hair were dyed purple. Their makeup, of course, was flawless, as was their golden-brown skin, which was just a little bit darker than Roman’s. He made a mental note to ask them about their skincare routine sometime; no matter how much care he treated his skin with, the acne on his cheeks refused to go away. It was his least favorite side effect of taking testosterone. “But you can be pretty and warm at the same time, if you want. I hate being cold. But I respect your decision to be pretty and cold if you want to,” he added quickly.

Virgil let out a slightly nervous laugh, rubbing the back of their neck. “Thanks, I think.” Their eyes widened as they looked past him. “Oh, my god, Remus, shut up!”

“What?” Roman asked, looking over at Remus, who was giving Virgil an evil grin.

“Nothing,” Virgil snapped.

“I didn’t say anything,” Remus said innocently.

“Shut up!” Virgil repeated, flipping the hood of their hoodie up and dragging it over their face.

“What’s going on?” Roman asked, confused, while Remus burst into cackles of laughter.

“Nothing!” Virgil repeated with great emphasis.

Roman let out a sigh of frustration, but Virgil seemed genuinely upset about whatever Remus had done when Roman wasn’t looking, so he dropped it. Maybe Remus would explain later.

Remus did not explain later; however, he did turn around to walk backwards after the silence had stretched on long enough to become awkward. “Is the ocean a soup? Discuss,” he commanded.

“Oh, not this again!” Roman groaned. “No, absolutely not!”

“Yes,” Virgil said, almost as soon as Roman stopped talking.

“No!” Roman stamped his foot. “That makes no sense!”

“It makes lots of sense. Explain how it’s not soup,” Virgil challenged.

The resulting argument lasted them all the way to the ice cream shop and halfway through their treats.

“Aren’t you going to take a side?” Roman demanded of Remus at last.

Remus looked up from his cone. “Oh, no, this is very entertaining for me, I could watch you two bicker all month. Please keep it up.”

“You’re a terrible person,” Roman told him, trying not to laugh.

“I never claimed to be anything else,” Remus said happily.

***

“—and that’s how you do it. It’s really easy, but it’s so fun, I could balance chemical equations for hours,” Remus said, bopping the tip of his dry-erase marker against the giant whiteboard in the library for emphasis. He and Roman and Virgil had all met up here to study; it was a sunny afternoon, and they’d gotten a nice spot by the window. The marker left a little black mark next to the diagram Remus had spent the last ten minutes drawing; he wiped the dot away with his finger. He was wearing a turtleneck with horizontal black-and-white stripes and a pair of faded jeans with paint splatters all over them and huge rips in the front that ran from his mid-thighs almost down to his ankles; he’d finished the outfit off with socks in sandals and a black felt beret. His outfit—vaguely artistic, but mostly just terrible—contrasted comically with the intensely technical pseudo-lecture on chemistry he’d just given.

Roman nodded without looking up. “I remember balancing those was fun,” he agreed. He hadn’t taken a chemistry class in a couple of years now, but Remus was majoring in it, and the best way for Remus to study was to explain it out loud, so he’d gathered Roman and Virgil in the library. They’d even been able to snag one of the coveted whiteboards. Roman was able to focus on his notes better with Remus’s animated talking in the background, and Virgil preferred quiet but was willing to put on his headphones to block out Remus’s noise, so all in all this arrangement worked out well for all three of them.

“Yes!” Remus agreed with a happy wiggle. He picked up his water bottle off the table and took a long sip. “Okay, next I have a bunch of molecules I have to memorize the structures of. Do you need anything first?” He addressed his question to both of them, but Virgil seemed pretty focused—or perhaps his music was loud enough to drown out other noises.

Roman, however, thought the question over. “Yes, actually, can you help me go over my lines for this one scene? It’s not very long.”

“Mmhm.” Remus held out his hands expectantly, and Roman handed him his script. Remus began fiddling with the dog-eared bottom corner of the page it was open to, folding it back and forth.

Roman dug in the pocket of his cargo shorts—he liked cargo shorts, partly for the shape but mostly for the pockets—and handed Remus a star-shaped fidget toy made of sequins that could be flipped back and forth. He’d rather the corner of the script didn’t get torn off by mistake.

“I think I’m off book, I just want to make sure,” he said as Remus accepted the toy and began fidgeting with it.

Remus nodded, scanning the page. “Sounds good. It’s just this one page?”

“Yeah. Ready?”

Remus nodded, and Roman launched into the scene. His character had most of the lines; it was essentially a glorified monologue. Remus interjected the two lines from other characters, using a hilarious nasally voice that made it hard for Roman to stay in character without breaking to laugh, but he successfully made it through the final line before dissolving into snickers.

“You’re word-perfect, kid,” Remus proclaimed as Roman got ahold of himself, handing him back the script.

Roman grinned. “Thank you!”

Remus nodded and took another sip of water before wiping down the whiteboard and launching into a ramble about the molecular structures he had to memorize.

Roman had just about tuned Remus out again and slipped back into the headspace where he could focus on his work when Remus broke off. “Logan!” he exclaimed, sounding delighted.

Roman looked up, and so did Virgil, pulling off hir headphones. Roman followed Remus’s gaze, and there indeed was Logan, his flat top haircut and dark academia outfit unmistakeable. He was stepping out of the stairwell that led down from the floor above, adjusting the strap of the leather messenger bag they used instead of a backpack. Even at this distance, the pins he kept on the bag were visible, neatly affixed in alternating rows on the bag’s buckle straps—a demiboy flag, an aromantic flag, an enamel pin shaped like an open book, and a handful of other pins Logan had collected from the university’s cultural centers during orientation. Roman had a few of that last category on his backpack himself; he knew he and Logan had matching land acknowledgment pins now, but he wasn’t sure if any of the other pins they’d chosen matched.

Remus darted across the wide open floor, weaving his way around a few students. “Logan! Hi!”

Logan looked up, a small smile finding its way onto his face as he saw Remus. He said something—presumably a greeting—but was too far away for Roman to hear, since he was speaking at a normal tone.

Remus seized Logan by the hand and dragged them towards Roman and Virgil. Logan laughed and said something in protest, pushing his square glasses up his wide nose as he followed Remus.

“Remus, I have to go to class,” Logan was insisting as they got close enough for Roman to hear. “Hello, Roman. Virgil.” They adjusted their already-immaculate clothing, the tendons in their thin hands flexing as they smoothed their mustard-brown cable knit sweater vest and tugged on the rolled-up sleeves of their periwinkle button down shirt.

Virgil gave a two-fingered salute. “Sup.”

“Hi Logan,” Roman said happily. “We’re studying!”

“Very nice,” Logan said, raising Remus’s hand—which was still clasping his own—and gently pressing it with their other hand. “I am always glad to see you, Remus, but I can’t stay long.”

“Okay,” Remus said. “I just wanted to say hi.” He gave Logan a quick, tight hug around the ribs before releasing them just as fast as he’d darted in.

Logan smiled again. “Hello, then. I hope your studying is going well?”

He received nods from the group, and gave them his own nod in return.

“You’ve got to go,” Remus reminded him. “You don’t like to be late.”

“True. I’ll see you later, dear.”

Remus nodded. “Wanna hang out tomorrow night?”

Logan considered this. “Maybe. I’m going to the Black Student Union meeting tomorrow evening. So it would have to be after that.”

“Okay, I can do that! I love you!”

Logan smiled. “I love you too, Rem.” They made as if to leave, then paused. “Roman, while I’m thinking of it—are you and Patton still free for lunch tomorrow?”

“Yeah,” Roman confirmed. Logan and Patton had two classes together, and so together with Roman they’d formed a tight-knit little friend group very quickly; the three of them tried to make sure to meet up for lunch at least once a week.

“Wonderful. I’ll text our groupchat about it. See you then.” Logan tugged his hand out of Remus’s grip, waved, and set off at a brisk pace back towards the stairs.

***

“I’m telling you, Virgil, Oberon and Titania are a really good example of how soulmates can make it through rough patches!”

“Bullshit. They’re obviously not a metaphor for soulmates, why would the fae even have soulmates? Their story is a cautionary tale,” Virgil said languidly, lying on their back on the floor of their room.

“No!” Roman pounded his fist on the floor. “Why do you always do this?”

“Because it’s funny,” Virgil replied with a snicker.

“But you always bash on soulmates, specifically!” Roman said.

“Yeah, because I think society’s emphasis on soulbonds is dumb.” Virgil shrugged. “Anyway, if you think Oberon and Titania’s relationship is a good example of anything, I have some concerns.”

“No—no, stop! I didn’t mean it like that! They’re fae, like you said. I obviously don’t condone any of the ways they treated each other! I’m just saying that viewing them as a metaphor for soulmates makes a really interesting lens to view the other couples in the play! Right, Logan?” He turned expectantly to Logan.

“Wh—no,” Logan, who was sitting on Remus’s bed and combing their fingers through Remus’s hair, his head in their lap, responded. “You are both, objectively, wrong. Horribly so. Painfully so.”

“Hey! You’re not allowed to tell me I’m wrong about Shakespeare,” Roman countered quickly.

“Why did you ask me for my opinion, then?” Logan asked, rolling their eyes.

“I don’t know,” Roman grumbled.

“Wait, why can’t they talk to you about Shakespeare?” Virgil asked.

“Because they always win!” Roman crossed his arms.

“Oh, and I don’t?” Virgil demanded. “What am I to you, Roman? I thought we had something special here,” they went on playfully. “You make dumb arguments, I make worse ones, and then I win. I thought that meant something to you.” They pouted at him.

“That’s different!” Roman protested, stifling giggles at the mopey puppy dog eyes Virgil was sending him. “You just don’t care what I say. Logan actually refutes my arguments! It’s very humiliating!”

“I only do it because your logic is physically painful to listen to,” Logan said.

Roman crossed his arms and pointedly turned away from Logan, nose in the air. “Anyway. As I was saying. Puck’s role in all of this is really interesting, if you consider the question: are the fae supposed to be able to truly alter soulbonds, or are they only messing with feelings?”

“Dear,” Logan said plaintively, looking down at Remus, his fingers still carding through Remus’s curls.

“Hmm?” Remus responded, not opening his eyes.

“Make them stop,” Logan said beseechingly.

“Sorry fellas, you heard them. Stop torturing Logan, he’s already an English major, so he’s plenty tortured already. Or else I’ll have to dissect your spleens.” Remus wagged a finger in Roman and Virgil’s direction.

“What a terrible fate that would be,” Roman commented, flopping over to lie on the floor beside Virgil.

Seconds later, his phone buzzed; he pulled it out to see a text notification from Virgil.

Virgil: oberon sucks btw

Roman: Oh, it is ON!

Roman grinned as he sent the response, already anticipating the thrill of the argument that was about to ensue. He felt a warm thrill in his chest at Virgil’s answering chuckle—it was good to know Virgil was having fun with this too.

***

“—so I was hanging out with Virgil the other day at the library cafe, and he said The Tempest was dumb because magic solves everything.” Roman was lying on the floor of his dorm, tossing a bouncy ball up in the air and catching it over and over again. Logan was sitting at Roman’s desk, legs up and crossed on the seat of the chair as he worked on readings for an English class, half-listening to Roman’s rambling. “And that since it solved all the problems, it made no sense for Prospero to give it up. Which was completely ignoring all the bad stuff magic had done and the symbolism of him throwing it away!”

“What did Remus have to say about that?” Logan inquired with a small laugh, not looking up from the copy of Frankenstein in his hands.

“What? Oh, nothing. Remus wasn’t there.”

“Oh?” Logan blinked, glancing up from the book.

“Yeah, we were at the library getting Starbucks, we do that on Wednesdays now. Remus was in his history class, I’m pretty sure.”

“I didn’t know you and Virgil hung out together,” Logan said, raising their eyebrows.

“Oh, we don’t, we just get coffee on Wednesdays, it’s different,” Roman said.

Logan stared at him. “...What?”

“Like, we only hang out on our own time to get Starbucks and then argue about Shakespeare. It’s really fun! It’s a great system, honestly. And this way, you don’t yell at me about Shakespeare or text Remus rant essays about what you think I’m getting wrong!”

Logan looked away, a very called-out expression on his face. “You weren’t supposed to see those…”

“Oh, Remus didn’t show me, I just broke into his phone the other day and it was open to your texts,” Roman said reassuringly.

“Why would you break into—” Logan began, not seeming reassured in the slightest.

“I needed to check his calendar to see if he was available to come with me to the grocery store,” Roman explained. “You know we’re really good at guessing each other’s passcodes. He doesn’t mind, we break into each other’s phones all the time.” He paused, assessing Logan’s face, trying to gauge if their expression was upset or not. “I’m sorry I read the texts, though,” he added, just in case it had hurt their feelings. “I only saw the very end of it, it wasn't on purpose or anything. Promise.”

Logan sighed. “I know. It’s alright.” He reached across the space between them to press the back of Roman’s hand.

Roman grinned. “Only you would come up with a whole essay in a text,” he teased. “Dunno what I expected, really.”

“It wasn’t an essay,” Logan said defensively. “Technically speaking.”

“I dunno, it sure looked like if you formatted it with MLA, you could turn it in for a grade.” Roman giggled. “But hey, what do I know?”

Logan opened his mouth to reply, but stopped as the doorknob rattled with the sound of keys.

Patton stepped in. “Hey! If it isn’t some of my favorite people!” he greeted the two of them with a smile. His dark, wavy hair was a little ruffled. Normally he combed it to the side, but Roman remembered it had been windy today, so Roman guessed that was responsible for the irregularity. “How are you doing?” Patton asked the two of them.

“Better now that you’re here,” Roman told him with an answering grin. “How’s your day been?” He’d noticed that Patton really liked being asked how his day had gone.

Sure enough, Patton’s smile spread a little wider. “Pretty good, thanks! I haven’t had too much to do today, which is nice. How are you doing, Logan?” He sat down on the floor beside Roman, sliding his backpack off his shoulders.

Roman immediately sat up and scooted over to lean against Patton—he was an excellent cuddler; he was tall and chubby and he ran warm, and Roman liked cuddles. He tended towards understimulation rather than overstimulation, and hugs were one of his favorite things. Patton was always happy to supply.

“I’m alright, thank you,” Logan said as Patton wrapped an arm around Roman’s shoulders. “A little underslept, but otherwise good.”

“Good, good. You should sleep more. Are you both busy?” Patton asked.

“No,” Roman said, because Patton always had fun ideas.

Logan pursed his lips, glancing down at the book in his hands in consideration. “I can finish this chapter later. Why?”

“Oh, I was just wondering if either of you wanted to play a board game,” Patton said. He and Roman had each brought a couple from their homes, and together they had quite the little collection.

“Yes!” Roman agreed eagerly, breaking away from Patton and crossing to the shelf where they kept the games. “How about Clue?”

“I will decimate you both,” Logan said, deadly serious, adjusting their glasses and scooting to the floor.

“All part of the fun, Specs.” Roman pulled out the box and set it down between them. “Dibs on the red piece!”

***

“—so I told him that was utter bullshit—not in so many words, of course—and listed off the reasons why, and he simply did not seem to recognize how completely nonexistent his logic was, he just kept repeating his original points louder and louder.” Logan punctuated his rant about a classmate with hand gestures as he walked next to Roman on the sidewalk.

“I hate guys like that,” Roman said, making a face.

Logan nodded. “But I got full credit on my discussion post when I typed up my argument and I cannot imagine he got the same, based on his talking points. So.” He shrugged, clearly trying not to look too smug with himself.

“Good job!” Roman told them.

“Thank you.” Logan’s happiness was palpable. “How have—”

“Logan!” Remus’s voice shouted.

Roman looked in the direction of the noise; they were almost an entire block away still from the quad, where they’d agreed to meet Remus, but he seemed to have spotted them. He was sprinting at full speed directly towards them.

“Oh, dear,” Logan said, the exasperation in his voice belied by the grin on their face. They took a step back and braced themself, just in time.

Remus full-on tackled Logan in a hug, colliding into him at full speed. Logan stumbled back a couple of steps, but successfully avoided falling over. “Hello, Remus,” he said composedly, wrapping their arms around Remus and returning the enthusiastic hug. “How are you?”

“Much better now. I missed you,” Remus said into Logan’s shoulder. “Normal people get all weird about it when I tell them cool murder facts. You're much cooler than normal people.”

“It has been twenty-seven hours and about thirty minutes since you last saw me,” Logan informed him. “And thirteen minutes since we last texted.” They rumpled his curls, which fell messily in loose spirals about his face; they were mostly about chin length, although some of them were choppily trimmed shorter than others. Remus was very insistent about cutting his own hair. It was always mildly disastrous, but he insisted he liked it that way. He’d dyed it himself, too; he’d bleached a streak at the very front of his head and dyed it silver about a month before college started, with a surprising amount of success.

“Yeah, and I missed you.” Remus stepped back from the hug as Logan released him. “Also hi Roman, I guess.” He tossed Roman a grin.

“You are a terrible brother sometimes,” Roman informed him. “Hi.”

“Uh, I think you mean all the time,” Remus corrected him. “I’m joking,” he added. “C’mon, I got Starbucks for us! I have extra meal credits!” He seized Logan’s hand and reached invitingly for Roman’s.

Roman let Remus grab his hand, too, and his brother immediately began dragging both Roman and Logan at a slightly breakneck pace down the sidewalk. Several students dove out of their way until he dragged them to a halt by the food truck, bouncing on the balls of his feet and waiting expectantly.

Not even a moment later, the barista placed three cups on the delivery window tray and called out Remus’s name.

“Yes!” Remus pumped his fist, darted over, and picked up two of the cups—Roman recognized Remus and Logan’s go-to coffee orders, a trenta mango-dragonfruit refresher and a grande vanilla sweet cream cold brew with extra ice. Roman picked up the last cup, a warm drink in a grande cup; he sniffed to check what it was even though he knew what Remus usually got him. Steamed apple juice with a sprinkle of cinnamon on top—his favorite as a kid and still one of his favorites now. He wrapped his hands around the warm cup and followed Remus and Logan over to a sunny patch on the lawn.

Remus sprawled out, taking up more space than seemed humanly possible for one person to fill; Logan tucked their legs beneath them as they sat beside Remus and began pulling out a textbook, a dog-eared novel, and a handful of pens and pencils from their messenger bag.

Roman sat so that he completed the triangle between the three of them, his legs crossed so he could lean his cup against them between sips and not worry about knocking it over.

“Thank you for the coffee, Remus,” Logan said, his cup halfway to his lips as he flipped through the worn novel.

Roman nodded in agreement, breathing in the warm cinnamon scent of the apple juice.

“Of course!” Remus said exuberantly, taking a noisy slurp of his drink.

Roman and Logan both winced slightly.

“Could you be a little quieter, there?” Logan asked mildly.

“How dare you.” Remus clutched his heart, leaning back so far Roman was surprised he didn’t lose his balance and fall over.

Logan sighed, reaching over and placing a hand over Remus’s, gripped around the edge of the cup’s lid. “At least please be careful not to splash,” he said, guiding Remus’s hand downwards until the cup came to rest on the ground. “This textbook cost rather a lot and I’d like to sell it back in a decent condition at the end of the term.”

Remus let go of the cup, leaving it to rest where it was, and leaned forward. He took Logan’s face in both of his hands and looked seriously into their eyes. “Hey. You are my best friend in the whole world and you mean everything to me. I love you and I’m so glad we’re soulmates. But I draw the line at stopping my annoying behavior for anything less than a natural disaster.” He released Logan and picked his drink back up. “I promise I won’t spill on your book, though,” he added lightly. “Roman gets no such promises.”

“You wouldn’t dare, you know I hate being sticky—” Roman began heatedly.

“Okay, okay. Jesus. You two are really conspiring to foil all my chaotic little gremlin dealings today. I’ll order an ice water to spill on you instead, will that make you happy?” Remus snickered.

Roman frowned. “If you must,” he begrudgingly agreed, since this seemed the closest thing to a compromise he was likely to get out of Remus. He suspected it might be a joke anyway, but he wasn’t sure about that and didn’t want to take any chances.

But Remus didn’t return to the food truck, so it seemed likely that it was a joke after all. Instead, he devoted himself to more noisy slurping, crossing his eyes and looking like he didn’t have a care in the world.

“You’re the tallest one of us,” Roman said after a moment.

“Huh?” Remus looked up at him.

“He has a point, dear,” Logan said, turning a page.

“Like yeah I know I am, but what’s the point?” Remus asked.

“You said we were foiling your chaotic little gremlin dealings,” Roman elaborated. “You’re, like, fucking… six two.”

“And a half,” Remus added. “Emotionally, I am a chaotic creature of spite who’s about three five and can sneeze fire, though.”

“That makes no sense,” Roman protested.

“Does too,” Remus responded, crossing his arms.

“It does,” Logan agreed. “For example, emotionally, I punch that one classmate in the face twice a week, but we can’t always embody what we want to be. And you, Roman—emotionally, you’re very invested in Shakespeare, but in actuality, your interpretations are painfully bad.”

“Hey. You talking about me and Shakespeare is off limits. We’ve discussed this.” Roman waved a warning finger at them.

“I still think that’s unfair and have raised a motion to reject and overturn the ban.”

“Unfortunately for you, the judge and jury are my feelings, and you hurt them, Logan. Shakespeare and I have something special. You need to stop trying to come between us like this.”

Logan glanced up from his book to give Roman a singularly unimpressed look. “You are preposterous.”

Roman beamed at him and made a heart shape with his hands, holding it up like a picture frame to look at Logan through. “But you loooooove me,” he singsonged.

Logan nodded. “This is true.”

“You’re both nerds and Shakespeare isn’t even that good,” Remus put in, a shit-eating grin on his face.

“I’m divorcing you,” Logan said immediately.

“Noooo, come back!” Remus dramatically grasped at the air as if reaching out from afar for Logan.

“Fine.” Logan shrugged. “Then Roman’s disowning you.”

“Hey, that’s my line!”

“He can’t disown me, he’d miss me,” Remus said confidently. “Y’all are stuck with me.” He looked very pleased with himself.

There was silence for a beat, then all three of them burst into laughter.

“I’m really glad we’re all friends,” Remus said happily, leaning back and taking another long sip of his drink.

“Yeah,” Roman agreed.

“I don’t know,” Logan said, holding back a smirk. “Sometimes I think about a world where I don’t have to deal with a pair of himbos every day of my life.” He maintained his faux-serious face for all of the three seconds it took both twins to start pelting him with ripped-up blades of grass, then devolved into helpless laughter again.

***

“Patton, you good? You’ve been kind of spaced out all day.”

“Huh?” Patton looked up, blinking through his round gold-rimmed glasses. “Yeah, I’m okay! Just… boy problems, I guess? Which is… it’s new.” He wrinkled his nose for a second in a face of dissatisfaction before smoothing his face back into a smile.

“Oh? Want to talk about it?” Roman asked eagerly, leaning forward and resting his chin in his hands, interest definitely piqued.

“I don’t know…” Patton glanced away. “It’s complicated. And it’s probably not a big deal.”

“Patton. We are friends. The main purpose of friends is gossiping about crushes.” Roman crossed his arms. “I am offended that you would ever doubt my capacity for talking about boys in a gay way.”

“I don’t think that’s the main purpose of friendship,” Patton said, but his smile looked more genuine.

“Shush, I know that, I’m being dramatic. How about a movie night and you can spill the deets in a cozy setting with popcorn? And Logan?”

“I mean… okay,” Patton relented. “It’s probably not as exciting as you’re hoping for, though, I’m sorry.”

“Nonsense. You are perfect and so is everything you do,” Roman said absently, pulling out his phone and FaceTiming Logan.

“Roman! You’re sweet, but you know you shouldn’t go around passing out compliments that should go to you,” Patton said.

“Oh, stop,” Roman said, grinning wide.

Logan picked up on the second ring. “What do you need, Roman?”

“To see your gorgeous face, nerd. Also we’re having a movie night at me and Pat’s, attendance mandatory. Seven works, right? Pat’s having boy problems.”

Logan stared at Roman with a blank face for several beats. “And… you want me there to help… why?” he deadpanned.

“Shut up, you have a nonromantic boy toy, you’re basically qualified to help.”

“Don’t call Remus that! He’s a person, not a—wait, he’s your brother, Roman, that’s worse, that’s so weird—”

“—Anyway, I can more than handle giving Patton plenty of terrible advice on his love life,” Roman interrupted. “You’re there to tell him everything I say is a terrible idea and let me throw popcorn at you. We can watch Big Hero Six. C’mon, it’ll be fun!”

Logan heaved a sigh. “Fine. But you have to put your dad’s curry powder on the popcorn.”

“What kind of man do you take me for, Logan? Of course we’ll have curry popcorn! See you at seven, love you, bye bye.” Roman blew a kiss and hung up.

After his English class, Roman grabbed a burrito from the dining hall and hurried back to the dorm, making it there at half past six. Patton was already back; he made hot chocolate while Roman microwaved popcorn and tossed it in a bowl with curry powder.

At precisely seven o'clock, there was a knock on the door; Roman let Logan in and the three of them climbed into the nest of pillows and blankets Patton had built on the bottom bunk, pushing aside the bi pride flag and the Puerto Rican flag Patton had hung like curtains around his bunk.

“So,” Roman said eagerly as the movie’s opening bot fight began on the laptop screen, turning to Patton and bouncing (Logan grabbed the popcorn bowl out of Roman’s lap as it jostled), “spill!”

Patton squirmed under the attention, a half-hidden smile ghosting its way onto his face. “I don’t know… what should I talk about?”

“What’s he like?” Roman asked. “How do you know him? Is he cute? Have you got his number?”

“Oh, wow—that’s a lot.” Patton giggled nervously.

“Okay, start with is he cute?”

“He’s really cute,” Patton allowed, biting back another smile. “He’s got all these freckles all over his face and neck and hands, and his eyebrows are really expressive—he gets this really serious face when he’s thinking, and it’s… really pretty.”

“Eyes?” Roman demanded. “How are his eyes?”

“I mean, they’re eyes? They’re this kind of greyish blueish color. I don’t know, I try not to stare, especially when he’s looking, you know?”

“Okay, that’s fair,” Roman relented. “What else? Is he fashionable?”

“I—not really, honestly. He mostly just wears longsleeve tees and jeans. Sometimes beanies. He has these really cute yellow converse that he always wears, though. He, like—oh, gosh, I’m not sure how to describe it. He’s not, like, fashionable like you asked, but he—kind of the way he holds himself makes it seem like he is? He wears his clothes well, I think is maybe the phrase.”

Roman nodded. “Alright. Do you know whether or not he’s queer?”

Patton hesitated. “Um… I’m not sure. I don’t know either way. But he was the only one that laughed at a bi pun I made one time, and he wore a pink shirt and yellow belt with faded jeans one time, which I might be reading way too much into but it sure looked like a sneaky pastel pan flag.”

Roman nodded very seriously, taking mental notes. “All good signs. Anything else? Any stickers on his laptop or water bottle? Pins on his backpack?”

Patton shook his head. “They’re, like, super empty. He doesn’t really do anything that tells people about his personality. His outfits are usually really plain, like I said, and everything. It’s weird, because he’s got such a distinct personality, and he really doesn’t seem like someone who’d leave his stuff unpersonalized. It’s like he’s afraid of something, or something.” Patton was silent for a moment, chewing on the inside of his cheek. “But then, he seems kind of nervous around me in general.” He looked away, a worried expression crossing his face.

“Maybe he likes you back?” Roman suggested. “Plenty of people get nervous around their crushes.”

Patton shook his head quickly. “No, I don’t think that’s it. I think I know what the thing worrying him is. I just… don’t know how to talk about it with him.”

“You do realize you’re being super vague here, right?” Roman queried; he couldn’t parse what on earth Patton meant by that, but his curiosity was piqued.

“I know.” Patton bit his lip. “I, um, don’t want to talk about it yet, I think. It’s complicated. I don’t think it would be fair to him to discuss it with others.”

“Oh.” Roman did his best to hide his disappointment. “Okay, that’s fine. How do you know him?”

His attempt to change the subject didn’t seem to ease Patton’s discomfort, based on the way his shoulders drew up even closer to his ears. “...Kind of from a class we’re in together?” he answered after a long pause. “We’re partners on a group project.”

“Sounds like a meet cute to me,” Roman said, searching again for new lines of questioning that would hopefully not be as upsetting for mysterious and unknown reasons. “What do you like about him?”

Patton lit up. “He’s really sweet, actually. It takes some looking to see it, because he’s got a lot of walls up, but you can tell he’s really thoughtful and observant, and he’s really warming up to me, I think—he’s being much nicer to me than most people, and I’m starting to think he really means it and wants to be nice to me just to be nice, not because he feels like he has to.”

“Well, of course he’d be nice to you, you’re like the sweetest person I’ve met in my life,” Roman said, feeling bewildered by this line of reasoning.

“No, I—oh, nevermind. I was worried he wasn’t genuinely being nice for a while, but I’m really starting to think he means it, is my point. Anyway, he’s really smart—he’s so good at like, you know, synthesizing stuff? He’s really good at finding the information we need and paraphrasing it in a way that works really well for our project. I have such a hard time wording things how I want, you know? So it’s awesome that he can do that so well. And he’s good at puns, too! He tries not to laugh, but he scrunches his nose up and gets really red cheeks so you can always tell, it’s really cute. And one time I was trying to explain to our professor he was wrong about something, but I was kind of having trouble getting my point across, the teacher didn’t seem to get it, and he just spoke up and pointed out exactly where the misunderstanding was. It was really nice and reassuring of him. He just seems really protective of people he cares about, you know?”

“He sounds great, Pat!” Roman agreed.

Patton nodded, giving an excited little wiggle.

The brief silence was broken by a quiet crunching noise. Roman looked to his other side to see Logan, eyes fixed on the movie, who had worked their way through a solid third of the popcorn.

“Oh, you fiend!” Roman cried, seizing the popcorn bowl back since he was sitting in the middle.

“What?” Logan defended himself exasperatedly. “You two seemed to be handling that just fine! I like this movie! Neither of you asked for the popcorn back! What did I do?”

“...Okay, technically nothing,” Roman admitted after considering this defense and finding it to be unfortunately solid and covering all of Logan’s bases. God, they knew him too well. “But we are supposed to be doing this as a group.”

Logan rolled his eyes. “Fine. Patton, he’s probably queer. You should ask him out and see what happens. Happy now?”

“Wh—how are you saying that with such confidence?” Roman demanded.

“Which part?”

“That he’s queer. I agree Patton should definitely ask him out at the first opportunity, we just hadn’t gotten to that yet.”

“I mean, I can’t say for sure, but being the only person in a classroom to react to a queer joke is pretty telling.” Logan shrugged. “Any other relevant details?”

Patton shrugged. “I don’t know. Janus—that’s the guy—he doesn’t talk about himself very much—”

“Hold on, Janus?” Logan interrupted. “Lanky white guy? Constantly acts like he’s just swallowed a lemon? Kind of a twink? Looks incredibly uncomfortable in his own skin? Growing his hair out?”

“Yeah, that sounds about right,” Patton admitted. “You could maybe be nicer about him, though.”

“I’m sure I could,” Logan said, seeming unconcerned. “Yeah, I know him. He’s queer, I’m pretty sure he’s compatible with you. No idea if he’d be interested, or frankly what you see in him, but go for it.”

“Wh—how do you know him?” Roman demanded. “I feel left out now!”

“We met at the Aspec—at a pride center identity group. Also he’s Remus’s roommate’s best friend. They’re practically attached at the hip. I’m surprised you haven’t met him yet, with how much you hang out over there lately.”

Virgil had a best friend? A best friend here, at college? That was news. Surprisingly unpleasant news—Roman wasn’t quite sure why. It wasn’t like he disliked Virgil to the point of not wanting them to have friends! Of course not! Frankly, he was glad to hear the tiny emo had a social life. It just kind of stung that this was the first time he was hearing about someone evidently so important to Virgil. And not even from hir own mouth. He’d kind of thought they were closer than that. That he’d have learned basic facts about what and who was important to Virgil by now. Learning otherwise was a remarkably unpleasant experience.

Logan took another handful of popcorn out of the bowl in Roman’s hands, startling Roman out of his thoughts.

“Stop!” he yelped. “I want some, too!”

“You have more if this bag runs out,” Logan pointed out. “I have some extra popcorn in my dorm too. And you’ve been holding out on me with your curry powder.” He popped another handful into his mouth and crossed his arms.

“If you just asked my parents, you could have some of your own! They’d even give you the recipe! Now share with Patton!” Roman leaned himself and the popcorn bowl away from Logan, trying not to laugh.

“I don’t mind,” Patton put in. “It’s very tasty, but I’m not as attached as Logan is.”

“No, you have to take some, he’s been hogging it,” Roman insisted.

“I don’t mind!” Patton insisted. Roman shoved the bowl in his face, and he relented and took a handful.

“Let Logan have some more now,” Patton said, gently pushing the bowl back into Roman’s lap.

“Thank you,” Logan said primly when Roman relented.

“You’re welcome!” Patton said with an easy smile. The smile fell away after a moment, though, and he looked thoughtful. “I’m not sure about asking Janus out, though,” he said hesitantly.

“Why not?” Roman asked. “You really sound interested in him! What have you got to lose?”

“It’s more complicated than that,” Patton said, worrying the edge of a blanket between his fingers. “I’m not sure if he’d be comfortable with it. I don’t—I don’t know.” He looked away. “I’ll figure it out, I guess.” He looked back at Roman and Logan, forcing a smile onto his face. “Thank you both for the advice, though. And for listening.”

“Patton—” Roman began, concerned.

Patton shook his head. “Let’s just watch the movie now, okay? Really. Thank you. But I’m good for now. Can I have some more popcorn?”

Logan wordlessly held out the bowl and Roman allowed himself to be mostly distracted by Big Hero Six. He felt better when Patton leaned on his shoulder, a genuine smile on his face as he watched Fred goofing around on the screen. Whatever the issue Patton was dealing with was, at least it didn’t seem big enough to keep bothering him after putting it aside.

***

“So,” Remus said with an evil grin.

“Whatever it is, I don’t want to know,” Roman said. They were both sprawled on Remus’s bed, sharing earbuds as Remus swiped through TikTok.

“It’s nothing!” Remus protested.

Roman gave him a suspicious look. Remus’s face was entirely too innocent.

“I was just wondering when you’re going to get your shit together and do something about your crush on Virgil,” Remus said, the evil grin back.

“My what?” Roman did a double take. “I—I don’t have a crush on Virgil, we barely even get along!”

Remus rolled his eyes. “Oh, please. The tension between you two is so high I’m surprised something hasn’t snapped yet. And you definitely have a crush.”

“I do not!” Roman grabbed Remus’s pillow and threw it in his brother’s face. “We’re barely even friends!”

Remus shoved the pillow aside and rested his chin on top of it, making a skeptical face.

“I mean, are they really pretty? Sure. But that’s not a crush,” Roman insisted.

“Mmhm. Okay. So what makes it not a crush?” Remus pressed.

“I—well—” Roman stammered, flustered by the very question.

“Uh-huh.”

“No!” Roman snapped, voice cracking. “I just—that’s a hard question to answer right off the bat! How do you define a crush? It’s just not, okay?”

“I mean, I define crush as, like…” Remus paused. “Huh. Okay. You have a point, or whatever. I guess… a crush is, like—huh. No. Okay. You’re distracting me. I’m teasing you about your crush that you totally do have, we are not veering off topic.”

“I do not have a crush on Virgil! I just want to be his friend! Okay?”

Remus made a skeptical face. “Sure, whatever you say. I’m still going to tease you about it.”

“Oh, whenever you find that third soulmate, I am getting so much revenge.”

“Eh.” Remus shrugged. “Like, go for it, but I dunno if you’ll have that much time to tease me about it before we get together. You know? Like, think about me and Logan.”

“Logan knew you were soulmates for two and a half years before you got togeth—”

“Yeah, because he’s smart, but I didn’t figure it out until thirty minutes before we got together. Or like. Thirty minutes before we started talking about it. You know this.”

Roman crossed his arms. This was unfortunately a very good point; the day Remus had figured out that Logan was one of his soulmates had been a pretty memorable one even for Roman. Logan and the twins had grown up next door to each other, and had been best friends since elementary school. One Saturday morning near the end of their senior year of high school, Remus had bolted upright in bed while Roman was brushing his teeth, blurted out something nigh incomprehensible, and taken off at a sprint; he’d slammed the front door behind himself on his way out and he hadn’t answered any of Roman’s texts for two hours, only to show up by sprinting back into the house and screaming at the top of his lungs “Logan and I are soulmates!”

This had prompted a lot of confused questioning from Roman. He’d learned that yes, Remus and Logan were definitely soulmates; Logan had figured it out in sophomore year but hadn’t said anything; Remus had only just figured it out; yes, Logan was still aromantic; yes, Remus was still allo; no, neither of them felt like either of these facts was an issue; and Remus was very happy.

“We’re going on, like, a date, but platonic,” Remus had announced to him that day, bouncing on the balls of his feet. “I’m really excited, this is so cool! Who’d have thought, right? Logan and me!”

Roman had smiled and tried hard to just be happy for Remus and Logan, and not jealous of them. Particularly about two months later, when they’d made their relationship official and become queerplatonic partners. He was happy for them! He was!

But Remus had never cared that much about finding his soulmates. Roman had. It didn’t feel fair. Remus, who didn’t care, got two soulmates, and one of them was literally his childhood best friend. Roman, who’d been daydreaming about finding his soulmate since he was too little to remember, and had learned just about everything there was to know about how soulbonds worked, seemed to have just the usual one soulmate. His soulbond hadn’t even developed until he was sixteen—admittedly, that was an expected side effect of the puberty blockers he’d been on for a few years before he’d been approved for T, but he was still salty about it. And when his soulbond finally had developed and he’d started tuning into his soulmate’s dreams, they were so creepy! He wasn’t sure he’d had a single souldream so far that wasn’t a nightmare. They ruined his sleep for the night whenever he got one. It was irritating and frustrating and all sorts of bad things; he’d actually cried over it a couple of times, not that anyone but Remus knew.

But as annoying as it was for him, it had to be worse for his poor soulmate—if these nightmares were what was making it through the soulbond, he could only imagine how much worse their nightly sleep must be.

He hoped he’d find them soon. He was ready for a proper romance, thank you very much!

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