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boykisser4 · 1 month ago

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Can you make an Alpha!Geto/Gojo x reader older brother omega where the two alphas plan to lose their virginity with the older brother, using their alpha pheromones to arouse the reader? If possible, show the consequences a few days later (pregnancy). I'm here for the nsfw, but I also want to see plenty of angst 🤭 thank you ❣️

Cursed Bonds 😋

pairing: alpha!Suguru Geto/gojo satoru x older omega male reader, nsfw so minors begone

warning: male reader, smut, omegaverse, pregnancy scare, oral and anal sex, a little bit of angst and fluff

"You're always so tense, Gojo," the young man's voice echoed through the room, a hint of amusement tugging at the corners of his mouth. Geto, lounging on the couch with his legs casually thrown over the armrest, studied his friend with a raised eyebrow.

The room was dimly lit, the curtains drawn to keep the prying eyes of the outside world at bay. It was their sanctuary, a place where the two of them could be themselves without the constraints of their pack's expectations. The air had anticipation, the scent of their unspoken desires hanging heavy between them.

Gojo Satoru, the stoic and powerful alpha of the juvenile delinquents, sat in his favorite chair, his eyes never leaving the figure before him. The reader, an older omega male with a quiet strength that belied his position, stood nervously by the door, his hands fidgeting with the hem of his shirt. He knew what was expected of him, but the reality was far more overwhelming than he had ever imagined.

Geto's smile grew wider, his eyes glinting with mischief. He had always found the older omega intriguing, a challenge that his alpha instincts craved. He knew that this moment would change everything between them, and the thrill of it made his heart race. He leaned in closer, his own scent becoming more potent as he whispered, "We both know what we need tonight."

The reader's cheeks flushed, his eyes darting to Gojo's before he nodded, swallowing hard. The room grew warmer as the two alphas' pheromones filled the space, a heady mix that was impossible to ignore. Geto's eyes narrowed slightly as he watched the omega's pupils dilate, his breathing becoming shallower. The effect was intoxicating.

Gojo's gaze remained intense, his body language speaking volumes despite his silence. He stood from his chair, the fabric of his pants straining against his growing arousal. His steps were deliberate as he approached the reader, his hand reaching out to cup the omega's face. The touch was gentle, yet firm, as if claiming the reader as his own. The omega's breath hitched, his body responding to the alpha's dominance.

"We've both been waiting for this," Gojo murmured, his voice a low rumble that seemed to resonate through the very core of the reader's being. "We won't take it from you, we'll share it with you," he assured, his thumb brushing against the reader's plump lower lip. Geto watched with rapt attention, his own desire spiking at the sight of the omega's vulnerability.

The reader's eyes searched Gojo's for a moment before he nodded again, his voice barely above a whisper. "I trust you both."

Gojo's smile grew more tender, his thumb now tracing the sensitive skin of the omega's neck, feeling the pulse quicken beneath his touch. "Good," he said, his voice thick with need. "You're going to need to trust us completely."

With a gentle push, Gojo guided the reader towards the bed, the soft mattress sinking slightly beneath their combined weight as they sat down. Geto mirrored Gojo's movements, his eyes never leaving the omega as he stepped closer. The reader could feel the heat radiating from their bodies, the potent alpha scent making him ache in a way that was both terrifying and exhilarating.

The tension in the room grew palpable as the two alphas began to undress the omega, their movements calculated and precise. Gojo's eyes remained locked on the reader's, as if he could read every thought and emotion that passed through his mind. He gently tugged the shirt over the omega's head, revealing the pale, unblemished skin beneath. Geto stepped closer, his own arousal clear as he took in the sight of the reader's chest, his nipples already pebbled from the cool air and the anticipation of what was to come.

The omega's breathing grew more erratic as Gojo's calloused hands slid over his skin, exploring every curve and plane. The alpha's touch was surprisingly tender, a stark contrast to the power he exuded. The reader's body responded instinctively, his scent growing sweeter as his arousal grew. Geto watched, his own hands trembling slightly with excitement as he began to undo the reader's pants.

The fabric fell away, revealing the omega's straining erection. Gojo's eyes darkened as he took in the sight, his own need growing more intense. He leaned in, his breath hot against the reader's ear as he whispered, "You're so beautiful." The omega's body shuddered at the words, his cock twitching in response.

The two alphas exchanged a heated glance, their need for each other and the omega between them a tangible force. They worked in unison, stripping away the last of the reader's clothing until he was laid bare before them. Gojo's hand found its way to the reader's hardened length, stroking it slowly as Geto knelt beside the bed, his eyes never leaving the omega's face.

With a soft, almost reverent touch, Geto traced the line of the omega's thigh before moving to his inner thigh, his fingers ghosting over the sensitive skin. The reader's hips jerked at the contact, a whimper escaping his lips. Gojo's grip tightened, his strokes growing more deliberate as he watched the omega's reactions.

The air grew thick with pheromones as the alphas continued their ministrations, the scent of desire and submission filling the room. The reader could feel his body responding, his cock growing slick with pre-cum as his mind raced with thoughts of what was to come. He knew that this night would be one of passion and intensity, a bond formed that could never be broken.

As Gojo leaned in to kiss the omega, their tongues dancing together, Geto's mouth found the reader's neck, his teeth grazing the soft skin. The reader gasped, his body arching into the dual contact. The alphas' pheromones were overwhelming, their combined scent making him dizzy with want. He had never felt so alive, so desired.

Geto's hand joined Gojo's on the omega's cock, their fingers intertwining as they worked in unison. The reader's hips rocked, his breath coming in short pants as pleasure built within him. He could feel their desire, their need for him, and it was intoxicating. They were so powerful, so dominant, yet they handled him with such care, it was as if he was the most precious thing in the world.

With a low growl, Geto stepped back, his eyes never leaving the reader's. He unbuckled his belt and slid his pants down, revealing his own impressive length. "Suck it," he ordered, his voice low and demanding. The omega's eyes widened, but he didn't hesitate. He leaned over, his mouth watering at the sight of the alpha's cock, and took it into his mouth.

The reader's lips wrapped around Geto's cock, his tongue swirling around the head as he took in the salty, musky taste. He sucked eagerly, driven by his own desire and the need to please the alphas. Geto's hand found the back of his head, guiding him deeper. The reader's eyes watered, but he didn't protest, his mind consumed by the feeling of being used and owned.

Meanwhile, Gojo had moved behind the omega, his own erection pressing against the plush cushion of the reader's ass. He slid a hand down the omega's spine, his thumb lingering at the base before moving to tease the sensitive entrance. The reader tensed, but Gojo's touch was gentle, reassuring, and soon he relaxed, his body begging for more.

Gojo's lubricated fingers began to penetrate the tight, warm channel, the reader's moans muffled by Geto's cock in his mouth. The alpha's movements were slow, careful, as he stretched the omega open, preparing him for the claiming that was to come. The reader's body shivered with pleasure as Geto's hips began to rock, his cock sliding in and out of the reader's eager mouth.

The alphas' eyes met over the reader's bent form, a silent conversation passing between them. They had both wanted this for so long, and now that it was happening, the intensity of their shared desire was almost overwhelming. Geto nodded, his expression one of pure lust as he pulled away, his cock glistening with the omega's saliva.

Gojo positioned himself behind the reader, his own need pulsing through his veins like a drumbeat. He watched as the omega's body trembled, his eyes glazed over with arousal. The alpha took a moment to appreciate the beauty before him, the way the omega's skin flushed with passion, the way his cock bobbed eagerly between his legs.

With a firm grip, Gojo guided his own erection towards the reader's tight hole, pausing for a moment to allow the omega to adjust to the feeling. The reader's breath hitched, his eyes squeezed shut tightly as the head of the alpha's cock breached the entrance. The sensation was new, foreign, and yet, it sparked a deep-seated need that had the omega's body begging for more.

Gojo pushed in slowly, inch by inch, his eyes never leaving the reader's face. The omega's mouth was still full with Geto's cock, muffling his whimpers and gasps. The alpha felt the reader's muscles tense around him, a silent plea for patience. He gave it, moving at a pace that was both gentle and maddening, allowing the omega to adjust to the intrusion.

Geto watched with hooded eyes, his own arousal reaching new heights as he felt the reader's throat work around his length. He could see the raw emotion playing out on Gojo's face, the concentration and restraint it took not to plunge in fully. It was a dance of power and care, and Geto was eager to see it unfold.

With a final, gentle push, Gojo was fully seated within the reader, his cock buried to the hilt. The omega's body quivered, a guttural moan vibrating through Geto's shaft. The alpha couldn't hold back any longer; he began to thrust, setting a rhythm that the omega's mouth soon matched.

The reader's eyes rolled back in his head as the alphas took him apart piece by piece. Each stroke of Gojo's cock sent waves of pleasure through his body, making his own cock throb painfully between Geto's tightly clenched fist. The feeling was indescribable, a maelstrom of sensation that had him teetering on the edge of oblivion.

*a few days later*

The reader's mind raced as he stared at the little white stick, the pink line glaring back at him like an accusation. The past few days had been a whirlwind of passion and pleasure, but now fear had settled in the pit of his stomach. The room felt too small, the walls closing in on him as he tried to comprehend the gravity of the situation.

He had been feeling off, more tired than usual, and when his heat had come a few days early, he had brushed it off as a fluke. But now, holding the pregnancy test in his trembling hands, he couldn't ignore the possibility that the night he had shared with Gojo and Geto might have had consequences they had not anticipated.

The omega's mind raced with scenarios, each more terrifying than the last. What would the alphas say? What would the pack think? His heart hammered against his chest as he tried to calm his racing thoughts. He knew that alphas could impregnate omegas with just one encounter, but he had hoped that their care and the contraceptive measures they had taken would be enough to prevent it.

Gathering his courage, the reader approached Gojo and Geto, his eyes downcast. They were in the living room, deep in conversation about pack matters. Their heads snapped up as he entered, their expressions immediately softening at the sight of him. But as they took in his ashen face and trembling hands, the mood shifted to one of concern.

"What's wrong?" Gojo was the first to speak, his voice gentle as he stepped towards the omega.

The reader held out the pregnancy test, his eyes pleading for understanding. "I-I think... I might be..." His voice trailed off, the words lodging in his throat like a boulder.

Gojo and Geto's expressions darkened, the atmosphere in the room changing in an instant. Gojo took the test from the omega's trembling hand, his eyes scanning the results before he looked up, his gaze a storm of emotions. "Sit," he ordered gently, guiding the reader to the couch. Geto was beside him in a heartbeat, his hand on the omega's shoulder, his eyes searching his face for any sign of distress.

The silence was deafening as the two alphas exchanged a weighted look, the implications of the test's result hanging heavily in the air. They had been so careful, so considerate of the omega's boundaries and needs, but fate had thrown them a curveball that neither had expected.

Geto was the first to react, his hand moving to the reader's cheek, his thumb brushing away a tear that had escaped the corner of the omega's eye. "It's okay," he murmured, his voice thick with emotion. "We're here for you, no matter what."

Gojo sat on the edge of the couch, his hand resting on the omega's thigh, offering what little comfort he could. His mind raced with the potential repercussions of the situation. Pregnancy was a rare and precious thing in their world, but the timing was terrible. The pack was on edge, and the alphas had enough to deal with already.

"We'll figure this out," Geto said firmly, his eyes never leaving the reader's face. "We'll tell the pack together." The omega nodded, his eyes brimming with unshed tears. He knew that the alphas would stand by him, but the fear of rejection from the pack was a very real concern.

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see-arcane · 2 months ago

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I recently picked up an anthology of Victorian era werewolf fiction called Terrifying Transformations. I have so many short story collections and novels of that period’s supernatural horrors, but so little of that material has featured werewolves that I assumed the monster simply wasn’t as popular back then as the usual vampires and ghosts. So I was thrilled to not only find this collection, but to get caught up in its introduction which delivers a brief history lesson on the many ways the werewolf character was held up as alternate symbols of villainy, madness, and freedom by the various movements that took place within the period. Including that of the anarchists.

Case in point, this Punch comic, which is included in the book itself:

The Were-Wolf of Anarchy, a symbol of the horrid anarchists out to dismantle good polite English society!

Just as the werewolf was worn by female villains in fiction, boasting strength, individualism, sexual liberation and, gasp, devouring rather than nurturing children; the New Woman in fur.

Just as it stood for the commoners and working-class parties striving for rights and recompense against the aristocrats and nouveau riche.

Beasts abound, howling and tearing. Anarchy! This bit says it best:

I haven’t even gotten deep into the stories themselves yet, but this little opening essay has been delicious to chew on. Werewolves have always been part of the modern Other-symbolism crowd, shouldered up against the undead and the uncanny. Monsters to alternately fear within or without, or else performing as outright escapism in shedding human constraints and the collars of society.

It never occurred to me how that particular lupine flag has been waving since at least the 1800s.

#anti-establishment werewolves my beloved #Terrifying Transformations: An Anthology of Victorian Werewolf Fiction #werewolf #history #anarchy #New Woman #Victorian era

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mortalislabs · 21 days ago

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Trigonelline is a methylated form of niacin and is a recently isolated molecule that could be the secret ingredient in your stack. This form of the B vitamin is involved in the generation of NAD+, a cofactor for over 500 metabolic processes in cells. Trigonelline promotes cellular repair and energy, and as we’ll see, exerts quite a few benefits that are specifically useful for anyone training seriously.

Trigonelline is found in several plant-based foods, notably coffee beans and fenugreek seeds. Green coffee beans contain trigonelline concentrations ranging from 0.6% to 1.0% by weight. However, traditional dietary sources don’t provide sufficient amounts to elicit significant physiological effects. For instance, the average trigonelline content in a cup of coffee is approximately 53 mg, and about 50-80% of trigonelline decomposes during the roasting process, leaving virtually nothing for your body to make use of.

Recent research published on this naturally occurring alkaloid highlights its potential in enhancing muscle function and combating age-related decline. A 2024 study published in Nature Metabolism identified trigonelline as a novel precursor to nicotinamide adenine dinucleotide (NAD+), a molecule essential for energy metabolism and mitochondrial function. The study demonstrated that trigonelline supplementation improved muscle strength and reduced fatigue in aged mice, suggesting that it can head off the natural muscle decline seen in aging, even in those who are already training at capacity.

NAD+ gets discussed a lot in the longevity space because of its natural and steep decline over the years, tied to all the diseases of aging. It's a metabolic linchpin that determines how efficiently your cells convert fuel into usable energy. For athletes, that efficiency translates into faster recovery, better performance under load, and greater resilience under metabolic stress. Or, you know, complete lack of those things if you don’t have enough of it.

NAD+ is required for redox (oxidation–reduction) reactions in mitochondrial energy production and is a cofactor and substrate for longevity-promoting sirtuins and other enzymes involved in muscle repair and adaptation. During intense physical activity, NAD+ levels drop as demand for ATP surges. Replenishing intracellular NAD+ is critical not only for restoring mitochondrial output but also for initiating the cellular programs that rebuild and reinforce muscle tissue [1].

Trigonelline offers a direct path to NAD+—one that bypasses the liver and supports muscle tissue specifically. In a landmark 2024 study, researchers at EPFL and Nestlé Health Sciences (yes, that Nestlé, but there aren’t any conflicts of interest, we checked) demonstrated that trigonelline functions as a previously unidentified NAD+ precursor, rapidly taken up by skeletal muscle cells and converted into NAD+ via a salvage pathway independent of the traditional NR or NMN routes [2]. This muscle-specific uptake is particularly important for athletes, who require localized replenishment in the very tissues under stress.

Most NAD+ precursors—including nicotinamide riboside (NR) and nicotinamide mononucleotide (NMN)—undergo hepatic metabolism before entering systemic circulation. This creates a bottleneck at your liver for targeted muscle repair. Trigonelline appears to bypass that constraint by delivering precursors directly where they're needed most: the muscle fibers responsible for performance and endurance.

This shift in delivery has implications beyond simple NAD+ restoration. In the same Nature Metabolism study, aged mice supplemented with trigonelline showed significant improvements in grip strength and fatigue resistance—outcomes tightly linked to muscle NAD+ availability. Unlike systemic precursors that may elevate circulating NAD+ levels without improving localized bioenergetics, trigonelline drives changes in muscle mitochondrial density and function.

For athletes, this is the difference between feeling recovered and actually being rebuilt.

Mitochondria Make Muscles Move

Endurance Starts in the Electron Transport Chain

Every sprint, every lift, every set depends on one thing: mitochondrial output. The ability to generate ATP on demand—efficiently and cleanly—is the defining line between sustained power and early fatigue. Trigonelline’s value lies not just in elevating NAD+ levels, but in what that elevation enables at the level of mitochondrial performance.

NAD+ drives oxidative phosphorylation, the mitochondrial pathway responsible for converting nutrients into ATP. When NAD+ is depleted, electron transport slows, reactive oxygen species accumulate, and mitochondrial output tanks—resulting in performance collapse and prolonged recovery. Replenishing NAD+ restores mitochondrial throughput, enhances metabolic flexibility, and allows cells to switch between carbohydrate and fat oxidation with minimal friction [3].

Trigonelline’s role as a direct NAD+ precursor in muscle tissue makes it especially powerful in this context. By bypassing hepatic metabolism and restoring NAD+ where it's most needed, it kickstarts mitochondrial biogenesis—activating pathways like PGC-1α that drive the formation of new mitochondria and increase the efficiency of existing ones [4]. This isn’t theoretical: in the 2024 Nature Metabolism study, trigonelline supplementation significantly boosted mitochondrial content and activity in aged mice, restoring performance metrics typically lost with age and overtraining [2].

This cellular shift translates directly to the field, the track, and the gym. More mitochondria means more ATP per unit of oxygen consumed. This is the underpinning of higher VO₂ max, improved lactate clearance, and extended time-to-exhaustion. Trigonelline supports this adaptation at the source, which means athletes can train harder, go longer, and bounce back faster—without relying on stimulants or sketchy ergogenics.

More NAD+ in muscle equals better mitochondrial kinetics, which equals better athletic output. Period.

Strength and Muscle Health

Preserving Power, Not Just Mass

Strength isn’t only about size—it’s about contractile quality, neuromuscular precision, and the cellular capacity to resist breakdown under stress. Trigonelline’s impact on muscle tissue reaches beyond endurance. It supports structural integrity, performance output, and resilience across multiple pathways—especially in the context of aging or chronic training demand.

In the 2024 Nature Metabolism study, trigonelline supplementation restored muscle grip strength and improved fatigue resistance in aged mice, with outcomes exceeding those observed in control groups receiving traditional NAD+ precursors [2]. This effect was tied to increased NAD+ availability in skeletal muscle, which reactivated SIRT1- and PGC-1α-dependent pathways responsible for mitochondrial biogenesis, inflammation control, and protein maintenance—all critical for contractile performance and mass preservation [5].

NAD+ also plays a protective role against muscle wasting. It regulates the balance between anabolic and catabolic signaling, modulating FoxO transcription factors and suppressing atrophy-related genes like MuRF1 and atrogin-1 [6]. This anti-catabolic signaling becomes especially important during periods of calorie deficit, illness, or overreaching, when muscle degradation accelerates. Trigonelline, by supplying NAD+ directly to muscle cells, may help maintain lean mass even under systemic stress.

One overlooked aspect of muscle performance is neuromuscular junction (NMJ) stability, or, the connections between nerves and muscle fibers. These connections go both ways, with afferent signals carrying sensory feedback from muscle to brain, and efferent signals delivering motor commands from brain to muscle. Maintaining the integrity of this bidirectional communication is essential for coordination, strength, and rapid recovery from fatigue. NAD+ is required for the function of enzymes that protect NMJ architecture—particularly in aging or disease models where synaptic decline contributes to strength loss [7]. Trigonelline’s direct muscle delivery may therefore preserve the electrical signaling fidelity needed for explosive power and motor unit recruitment.

Muscle Fiber Type Preservation

Emerging evidence suggests that NAD+ availability influences muscle fiber type composition. High NAD+ levels favor the maintenance of fast-twitch (Type II) fibers—those responsible for strength, speed, and power—by enhancing mitochondrial support without triggering full transition to slow-twitch oxidative profiles [8]. This has implications for athletes seeking to maintain peak force output without compromising endurance. By elevating muscle NAD+ directly, trigonelline may help preserve this delicate fiber balance.

Trigonelline is formulated not to just support general energy—but to protect the architecture of athleticism at the cellular level.

For a reliable, pure form of trigonelline with zero additives, you can trust Mortalis Labs.

#longevity #trigonelline #nmn #fitness #gym #metabolismboost #metabolismsupport #healthylifestyle #healthtips #healthy living

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pearlprincess02 · 5 months ago

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lilith in a man's birthchart

aries lilith

men with aries lilith often find themselves attracted to powerful, rebellious women who exude confidence and assertiveness. this attraction stems from a desire for excitement and the thrill of unconventional relationships. however, they may grapple with hidden desires and fantasies that clash with societal expectations, leading to internal conflicts. their relationship with feminine power can be challenging, as they might feel both drawn to and threatened by women who embody independence and strength. this dynamic can create repressed anger or resentment, particularly if they perceive these women as challenging traditional masculine roles. ultimately, their rebellious spirit urges them to break free from the constraints of conventional masculinity, pushing them to redefine their identities and embrace a more authentic self.

examples from tv: spike (buffy the vampire slayer), damon salvatore (the vampire diaries), jax teller (sons of anarchy), klaus mikaelson (the originals), han solo (star wars: the clone wars),

taurus lilith

men with taurus lilith often feel a magnetic attraction to powerful, rebellious women who embody sensuality and independence. this attraction goes beyond the physical; it is deeply rooted in their appreciation for stability and luxury, combined with a desire for excitement. however, these men may struggle with hidden desires and fantasies that challenge their need for security, leading to inner conflicts about their attractions. their relationship with feminine power can be complicated, as they might find themselves both enthralled and intimidated by strong women who assert their dominance. this tension can result in repressed anger or resentment, especially if they perceive these women as threatening their comfortable lifestyles or traditional views of masculinity. ultimately, their rebellious spirit can drive them to question and redefine their roles, pushing them to embrace a more liberated understanding of masculinity.

examples from tv: nate archibald (gossip girl), chandler bing (friends), loki (loki), gustavo "gus" fring (breaking bad), eric northman (true blood)

gemini lilith

men with gemini lilith are often drawn to powerful, rebellious women who stimulate their minds and challenge societal norms. this attraction is fueled by a desire for intellectual connection and playful banter, making them appreciate women who are both assertive and articulate. however, beneath this surface lies a web of hidden desires and fantasies that may conflict with their need for variety and freedom, leading to an internal struggle. their relationship with feminine power can be perplexing, as they may admire strong women while feeling threatened by their assertiveness. this dynamic can manifest as repressed anger or resentment, particularly when they perceive these women as disrupting their freedom or challenging traditional masculine roles. ultimately, their rebellious spirit encourages them to question conventional expectations, pushing them to explore new identities and embrace a more authentic expression of masculinity.

examples from tv: chuck bass (gossip girl), puckerman (glee), jack pearson (this is us), don draper (mad men), cameron tucker (modern family)

cancer lilith

men with cancer lilith are drawn to powerful, rebellious women who challenge traditional ideas of nurturing and emotional roles. they may find themselves attracted to women who are fiercely independent yet capable of deep emotional intensity. however, their hidden desires and fantasies can create a sense of internal conflict, as they crave emotional intimacy while simultaneously fearing vulnerability. these men often wrestle with their relationship to feminine power, feeling both comforted and threatened by women who assert themselves emotionally and break from the traditional nurturing role. this tension can manifest as repressed anger or resentment, particularly if they struggle with their own vulnerability or feel their need for emotional security is being undermined. their rebellion against traditional masculine roles involves redefining what it means to be emotionally available, pushing them to embrace more fluid and less rigid definitions of strength and masculinity.

examples from tv: jamie fraser (outlander), rick grimes (the walking dead), jon snow (game of thrones), dean winchester (supernatural), jim hopper (stranger things),

leo lilith

men with leo lilith are intensely drawn to powerful, rebellious women who radiate confidence, creativity, and self-expression. they are captivated by women who defy societal norms and demand to be seen and heard. however, beneath their attraction lies a complex web of hidden desires and fantasies, often centered around the allure of being admired and adored. these men may experience challenges with feminine power, as the strength of such women can trigger feelings of insecurity or competition. their pride and ego may lead to repressed anger or resentment, especially if they feel overshadowed or unappreciated by these dominant women. the rebellion against traditional masculine roles comes from their need to redefine strength and masculinity, not just as dominance but as an ability to appreciate and uplift the brilliance of others—especially strong women—without feeling diminished.

examples from tv: lucifer morningstar (lucifer), barney stinson (how i met your mother), tony stark (iron man), harvey specter (suits), jackson avery (grey’s anatomy)

virgo lilith

men with virgo lilith are attracted to powerful, rebellious women who exhibit intelligence, independence, and a practical yet unconventional approach to life. they are drawn to women who challenge norms through subtle acts of rebellion, often through their intellect, precision, or mastery of a craft. beneath this attraction lies a world of hidden desires and fantasies, often revolving around control and perfectionism, creating a tension between wanting to maintain order and embracing chaos. these men may struggle with feminine power, as they often feel a need to critique or fix the strong women they admire, which can lead to repressed anger or resentment if they feel overshadowed or unable to assert their dominance. their rebellion against traditional masculine roles surfaces in their challenge to the idea of male authority, favoring a partnership where intelligence and competence are equally valued, though they may struggle to fully relinquish control.

examples from tv: sherlock holmes (sherlock), gregory house (house m.d.), spencer reid (criminal minds), sheldon cooper (the big bang theory), will graham (hannibal),

libra lilith

men with libra lilith are attracted to powerful, rebellious women who possess grace, charm, and a sense of justice, often finding themselves drawn to women who challenge societal norms in subtle yet impactful ways. these women’s defiance of conventional beauty, relationship dynamics, or fairness deeply intrigues them. underneath this attraction, there is a layer of hidden desires and fantasies centered on partnership, harmony, and control within relationships, creating tension between wanting to be the ideal partner and grappling with a need for power and dominance. these men often experience challenges with feminine power, particularly when their partners’ strength threatens their sense of equality or when they feel unable to maintain balance in their romantic lives. repressed anger or resentment can surface if they feel unappreciated or compromised within the relationship. their rebellion against traditional masculine roles manifests in their rejection of conventional relationship structures, seeking balance but struggling with personal insecurities and the need for control.

examples from tv: stefan salvatore (the vampire diaries), joe goldberg (you), dan humphrey (gossip girl), ross geller (friends), chuck rhoades (billions)

scorpio lilith

men with scorpio lilith are magnetically attracted to powerful, rebellious women who exude intensity, mystery, and emotional depth. these women often challenge societal taboos or wield a hidden strength that both fascinates and intimidates them. their attraction is rooted in hidden desires and fantasies that revolve around control, emotional domination, and exploring the darker, more forbidden aspects of intimacy. this creates an internal power struggle, as they may feel both captivated and threatened by feminine power, which can lead to possessiveness, jealousy, and obsession. their challenges with feminine power often manifest in a need to dominate or be consumed by it, creating turbulent relationships that can lead to repressed anger or resentment if they feel they are losing control. their rebellion against traditional masculine roles is expressed through their fascination with exploring the depths of human desire, emotions, and power dynamics, often seeking to subvert typical expressions of masculinity and authority in favor of intensity and vulnerability.

examples from tv: tommy shelby (peaky blinders), james st. patrick "ghost" (power), negan (the walking dead), walter white (breaking bad), tony soprano (the sopranos)

sagittarius lilith

men with sagittarius lilith are drawn to powerful, rebellious women who embody a free spirit and a thirst for adventure, often seeking partners who challenge conventional wisdom and societal expectations. these women may have an untamed, wild quality, and their rebelliousness often manifests in their rejection of boundaries, both intellectual and physical. these men harbor hidden desires and fantasies of exploring the world alongside a partner who is as daring and independent as they are, but this attraction can lead to conflict when they struggle with the unpredictability of feminine power. their challenges with feminine power stem from their desire for freedom clashing with the intensity and depth that such relationships demand. repressed anger or resentment may arise if they feel their independence is threatened or restricted in any way. their rebellion against traditional masculine roles is expressed in their refusal to conform to societal norms of relationships or commitment, often preferring unconventional or non-monogamous dynamics that allow them to maintain their sense of personal freedom and autonomy.

examples from tv: jack sparrow (pirates of the caribbean), hank moody (californication), bojack horseman (bojack horseman), john b (outer banks), thor (mcu)

capricorn lilith

men with capricorn lilith are drawn to powerful, rebellious women who embody authority, ambition, and a defiance of traditional feminine roles. these women are typically career-driven or possess an air of status and control, which is simultaneously alluring and intimidating. their attraction is rooted in the desire to conquer and be conquered by a woman who is at the peak of her power. this fascination often hides deeper fantasies about power dynamics, where control and vulnerability are intertwined. however, they may struggle with the challenges that come with such strong feminine energy, particularly around their own issues with authority and responsibility. repressed anger or resentment can surface when they feel emasculated or overshadowed by a woman’s success or independence. their rebellion against traditional masculine roles often expresses itself through a rejection of societal expectations about male dominance, as they wrestle with the idea of being the submissive or supportive partner in relationships. despite this, their ambition to maintain control may create a constant tension between their need for power and their attraction to women who challenge it.

examples from tv: logan roy (succession), frank underwood (house of cards), raymond reddington (the blacklist), bill compton (true blood), bruce wayne / batman (gotham)

aquarius lilith

men with aquarius lilith are deeply attracted to unconventional, rebellious women who defy societal norms and embody freedom, individuality, and intellectual independence. these women often carry a unique, eccentric energy that challenges traditional ideas of femininity and relationships. the allure lies in their unpredictability and their refusal to conform, which sparks hidden desires and fantasies about liberation and sexual experimentation. however, these men may experience internal conflict as they grapple with their attraction to powerful, independent women who prioritize autonomy over attachment. their rebellious nature often extends to rejecting conventional masculine roles, finding excitement in subverting traditional power dynamics within relationships. this can result in repressed anger or resentment when they feel challenged or disempowered by a woman's independence. they may oscillate between wanting emotional closeness and needing space, reflecting a fear of losing their freedom. ultimately, their journey with lilith in aquarius is one of learning to embrace power in relationships without feeling threatened by it, and to balance their own desire for rebellion with the need for genuine connection.

examples from tv: rick sanchez (rick and morty), elliot alderson (mr. robot), the doctor (doctor who), tyrion lannister (game of thrones), saul goodman (better call saul)

pisces lilith

men with pisces lilith are drawn to powerful women who possess a mystical, ethereal quality. these women often exude a spiritual or creative energy that blurs the line between fantasy and reality, triggering deep, hidden desires within the man. there is a magnetic pull towards women who are not only emotionally profound but also elusive, embodying an otherworldly charm that fuels his imagination and fantasies. the attraction to such women can also challenge his concept of power and femininity, as these women often refuse to be confined by traditional roles, instead embracing a more fluid, intuitive strength. these men may struggle with feelings of inadequacy or confusion in the presence of such women, as they grapple with their own inner world, fears of vulnerability, and their tendency to idealize relationships. repressed anger or resentment can arise when they feel lost or overwhelmed by the intensity of their desires, or when they perceive that their emotional boundaries are being crossed. ultimately, the lesson of pisces lilith for these men is to embrace vulnerability and surrender to the emotional depths without losing themselves in the process. they must learn to balance their yearning for spiritual connection with the grounded reality of relationships.

examples from tv: dexter morgan (dexter), john constantine (constantine), daryl dixon (the walking dead), patrick jane (the mentalist), jesse pinkman (breaking bad)

in houses

lilith in 1st house: magnetism, dominance, rebellion, self-expression, boldness, confrontation, assertiveness, intimidation, fierce attraction, physical appearance, power play, body language, arrogance, leadership, intense gazes, swagger, provocative style, self-image, first impressions, commanding presence, challenging authority, attention-seeking, strong opinions, admiration of confidence, non-conformity, sexual tension, bold fashion choices, provocative gestures, overcoming repression, defiant posture

lilith in 2nd house: possession, material desires, financial control, luxury, sensual indulgence, jealousy, reckless spending, obsession with wealth, power through assets, resource dominance, greed, status symbols, attachment to physical things, sexual tension in exchanges, control through gifts, materialistic relationships, wealth as power, value of power dynamics, financial independence, hidden resentment over dependence, possessive attraction, investment in rebellion, tangible dominance, defiance of traditional roles in finances, desire for financial freedom, hidden fantasies tied to wealth, sensual power dynamics, ownership & rebellion, material security vs. emotional vulnerability, sexual energy through resources

lilith in 3rd house: flirtatious communication, verbal dominance, secretive conversations, debates about gender roles, intellectual seduction, curiosity about taboo topics, power in words, mind games, provocative texts, rebellious thoughts, seducing through language, secretive fantasies shared in conversation, repressed anger in communication, unspoken desires, gossip as a tool for power, obsession with powerful women’s intellect, rebellion against conventional thinking, flirtation through wit, hidden attraction in daily interactions, power struggles in siblings/family dynamics, rebellious learning, subversive humor, mental power dynamics, fascination with taboo knowledge, deception & hidden intentions, sexual tension in casual conversation, control through information, repressed resentment in discussions, challenging authority in learning, sexual energy in debates & arguments

lilith in 4th house: power struggles at home, attraction to dominant, maternal figures, hidden resentment in family dynamics, fantasies about domestic rebellion, emotional repression, desire for control in private life, attraction to unconventional women in family settings, rebellion against traditional family roles, emotional intensity behind closed doors, secret power plays in the home, mother complex, hidden anger towards female authority figures, resentment of domestic expectations, fantasies of breaking free from family traditions, emotional manipulation in the family, attraction to emotionally intense women, rebellious women in intimate spaces, family secrets involving powerful women, fascination with taboo emotions, emotional dependency on dominant women, repressed rage toward mother figures, challenging traditional gender roles in the household, emotional control in family matters, desire for emotional freedom, secretive home life, tension between family duties & personal desires, emotional rebellion against authority figures, hidden desires related to home & comfort, powerful emotional connections with rebellious women, attraction to women who challenge domestic norms

lilith in 5th house: attraction to dominant lovers, rebellious women in creative expression, hidden desires in romantic encounters, power plays in dating, fantasies about unconventional love affairs, rebellion against traditional romance norms, resentment of traditional masculine roles in love, attraction to bold, creative women, desire for passionate, intense sexual experiences, hidden anger towards expectations in dating, power struggles in romantic relationships, fascination with taboo forms of pleasure, creative expression as a form of rebellion, secret romantic fantasies, resistance to conventional relationships, drawn to women who challenge romantic norms, hidden resentment in love & dating, attraction to women with strong, artistic energy, fantasies of dominance & submission in love, romantic power dynamics, repressed anger expressed in flirtation, desire for wild, rebellious relationships, challenging traditional masculine roles in sex, intense sexual energy, resentment of societal expectations in dating, powerful attraction to free-spirited women, fantasies about breaking romantic taboos, romantic rebellion against authority, unconventional sexual desires, power struggles in creative collaborations

lilith in 6th house: attraction to rebellious co-workers, power struggles in the workplace, desire for control in daily tasks, hidden resentment towards authority, rebellion against workplace norms, attraction to women who challenge routines, fantasies about breaking daily routines, powerful, defiant women in service roles, resentment of traditional roles at work, desire for sexual tension in daily life, challenges with female bosses or colleagues, hidden anger expressed through daily habits, resistance to conventional workplace hierarchies, attraction to women who disrupt order, fantasies about dominance and submission in work settings, desire for rebellious women in health or wellness, repressed anger in routine or service roles, hidden sexual fantasies involving power dynamics at work, rebellion against the monotony of daily life, attraction to women with strong work ethic yet defiant attitude, power plays in daily responsibilities, fantasies of breaking rules in structured environments, desire for non-traditional partnerships at work, repressed anger about societal work expectations, attraction to strong women in fitness or health roles, resistance to conforming in daily routines, sexual energy expressed through rebellious acts at work, power struggles in mundane responsibilities, hidden resentment of conventional gender roles at work, desire for intense, rebellious daily interactions

lilith in 7th house: attraction to rebellious partners, power struggles in relationships, fantasies of dominant women in partnerships, challenges with balancing control in love, repressed anger in long-term relationships, desire for unconventional marriage roles, attraction to women who challenge traditional relationships, hidden sexual fantasies with rebellious lovers, power dynamics in romantic partnerships, attraction to women who defy societal expectations, rebellion against traditional masculine roles in marriage, fantasies about equal or submissive partnerships, resentment toward societal pressures in relationships, attraction to assertive, independent women, power struggles with powerful women in love, fantasies of breaking traditional marriage rules, hidden anger over unfulfilled relationship expectations, resistance to conventional relationship structures, attraction to women with strong, defiant personalities, desire for rebellious, non-traditional relationships, repressed anger expressed through relationship conflicts, attraction to women who challenge gender roles in marriage, fantasies about breaking societal norms in love, power struggles in business partnerships, desire for intense, transformative relationships, hidden resentment of traditional relationship expectations, rebellion against commitment norms, fantasies about free-spirited, rebellious women, desire for non-conforming, adventurous partners, tension between traditional roles & personal freedom in relationships

lilith in 8th house: attraction to intense, powerful women, hidden sexual fantasies with rebellious partners, power struggles in intimate relationships, fascination with taboo or forbidden desires, desire for transformative sexual experiences, rebellion against conventional sexual norms, repressed anger over sexual control, attraction to women with dark, mysterious energy, fantasies of intense, secretive relationships, obsession with powerful feminine energy, resentment toward emotional vulnerability, challenging traditional masculine roles in intimacy, attraction to women who embody sexual independence, repressed desires for control & dominance, deep emotional & sexual power dynamics, desire for women who challenge societal taboos, fascination with women who exude sexual authority, struggles with emotional & sexual transparency, fantasies about power exchange in intimacy, anger over unmet deep emotional desires, rebellion against traditional views of masculinity in sex, attraction to women who explore emotional depth, repressed fantasies about transformation through love, power conflicts in sexual relationships, desire for intense, life-changing connections, attraction to women with secretive, rebellious lives, hidden anger over emotional intimacy struggles, challenges balancing vulnerability & power, fantasies about liberating experiences through sex, resistance to traditional views on commitment & emotional bonds

lilith in 9th house: attraction to free-spirited, rebellious women, fantasies about adventurous sexual experiences, desire for partners who challenge cultural norms, exploring taboo ideas in love & sex, rebellion against traditional beliefs about relationships, fascination with women who defy societal expectations, hidden fantasies about unconventional partnerships, resentment toward restrictive relationship ideals, attraction to women with a strong sense of independence, fantasies about distant, exotic love affairs, challenging conventional views on masculinity through travel, struggles with commitment due to a desire for freedom, fantasies about intellectual & physical exploration, repressed anger about limited personal freedom, attraction to women who embody independence & curiosity, desire for women who expand the mind & challenge dogma, hidden longing for spiritual or philosophical connection, resentment toward traditional gender expectations, fantasies about sexual liberation through travel or study, power struggles in relationships based on belief systems, fascination with women who break religious or cultural rules, attraction to women with radical ideas & bold worldviews, repressed anger toward societal or religious authority, desire to break away from conventional relationship structures, fantasies about uninhibited, boundary-breaking relationships, resentment over feeling confined by traditional values, challenges balancing adventure & intimacy, fascination with philosophical debates about love & power, rebellion against expectations to conform in romantic roles, attraction to partners who inspire rebellion against norms

lilith in 10th house: attraction to ambitious, authoritative women, fantasies about powerful women in leadership roles, desire for women who challenge societal expectations, rebellion against traditional career expectations for men, fascination with women who assert dominance in public life, power struggles with authoritative female figures, hidden fantasies about public sexual escapades, resentment toward traditional masculine power dynamics, desire to break away from conventional career paths, attraction to women with strong social influence, fantasies about relationships with high-status women, challenges with feminine authority in professional settings, repressed anger about societal pressure to conform in career, attraction to women who redefine power in the workplace, hidden desire for fame through rebellious actions, resentment toward societal expectations of masculine success, fantasies about publicly defying gender norms, power struggles with women in professional or public roles, attraction to rebellious women who challenge patriarchy, desire for sexual liberation through career or status, fascination with taboo power dynamics in professional settings, repressed anger toward authoritative institutions, fantasies about being dominated by a powerful woman, attraction to women who wield influence over men’s careers, challenges balancing public image and hidden desires, rebellion against traditional gender roles in the public sphere, desire for a partner who shares rebellious views on status, fantasies about women who defy professional stereotypes, attraction to women who challenge the glass ceiling, resentment toward societal expectations of leadership roles

lilith in 11th house: attraction to unconventional, rebellious women in social circles, fantasies about women who disrupt group dynamics, desire for women who challenge collective norms, rebellion against traditional masculine roles in friendships, fascination with women who are leaders in social causes, hidden fantasies about group or communal sexual encounters, power struggles with women in social settings, repressed anger toward collective ideals of masculinity, desire to break away from societal expectations within communities, attraction to women with unique, visionary ideas, fantasies about being dominated in social or public settings, challenges with feminine authority in friendships or groups, resentment toward masculine expectations in social networks, attraction to women who revolutionize social movements, hidden desires for rebellion through collective action, fantasies about relationships that defy social structures, rebellion against gender norms within peer groups, power struggles with women who hold social influence, attraction to rebellious women who challenge societal causes, fantasies about group dynamics that blur gender roles, repressed anger toward social expectations of masculinity, desire for women who influence or disrupt male-dominated groups, challenges balancing personal ideals & hidden desires, fascination with taboo relationships within social communities, attraction to women who are outliers or revolutionaries in their circles, fantasies about radical change through collective power, rebellion against groupthink and traditional group values, desire for a partner who shares non-conformist social ideals, power struggles with women who hold sway over collective ideals, hidden fantasies about women who upend social hierarchies

lilith in 12th house: attraction to mysterious, elusive women, fantasies about secret or forbidden relationships, desire for women who embody hidden, taboo power, repressed anger toward feminine power buried in the subconscious, attraction to women who explore spiritual or psychic realms, hidden fantasies about surrendering to feminine authority, rebellion against traditional masculine roles in spiritual or private settings, challenges with integrating feminine power in the unconscious, fascination with women who are outcasts or operate in the shadows, desire for secret or hidden liaisons with powerful women, power struggles with women in hidden, psychological contexts, repressed desires for domination by women in private or spiritual matters, attraction to women who represent repressed or hidden truths, fantasies about submission or power play behind closed doors, rebellion against masculine ideals within spiritual or psychological frameworks, challenges balancing hidden desires with public persona, desire for women who operate in secrecy or behind the scenes, fantasies about feminine dominance in dream-like, surreal situations, repressed anger toward societal norms that suppress hidden desires, attraction to women with deep psychological or spiritual influence, hidden fantasies about escape into secret worlds or realms, struggles with traditional masculinity in the face of feminine mystery, attraction to women who bring hidden fears or desires to the surface, fantasies about power dynamics in secret or unconscious spaces, rebellion against public norms in favor of private, hidden experiences, desire for transformative, secret relationships with rebellious women, power struggles with women in spiritual or psychological depths, fantasies of release or surrender in hidden, intimate contexts, attraction to women who help explore repressed or unconscious desires, hidden anger or resentment toward societal repression of taboo desires

all observations are done by me !!! @pearlprincess02

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saturnsbabyboii · 2 years ago

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✧Saturn Through the Houses✧

(Brought to you by Sailor Saturn)

(It's important to note that Saturn, it's energy and lessons are transcending so you may not completely relate to it's house exclusively, as the the placement of the sign ruler, along with the aspects made to Saturn play a vital role in understanding the planet.)

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Within astrology, the planet Saturn is renowned for its role as a strict but devoted and highly effective mentor and teacher. Its overarching influence and energy are said to challenge us to work diligently, with an unwavering sense of discipline, while also placing a strong emphasis on the importance of responsibility and constraints. Often depicted as a personification of Father Time, Saturn serves as a powerful reminder of the limitations and constraints that time places upon us all. We would make little or no progress if Saturn did not exist. We live in a physical world, and Saturn encourages us to deal with it. Saturn plays a crucial role in bringing order and discipline into our lives. It challenges us to confront the harsh realities of life and helps establish a sense of structure and control. When Saturn influences a particular area of our natal chart, it can cause delays or obstacles. It is often associated with a cold and unyielding nature, earning it the nickname of "heavy" or "leaden." Going against Saturn's influence, would cause your life to turn chaotic and lacking in direction.

As the governor of old age and the lessons that come with it, Saturn is a planet that emphasizes the value of learning life's lessons as we grow older and wiser. It is said to admire the wisdom and authority that comes with age and is often considered the planet of karma, representing the lessons that we must learn in this lifetime. Despite its association with life's more challenging aspects, it is often noted that things tend to improve significantly after the age of thirty, as we become wiser and better equipped to handle life's many challenges.

Saturn represents a wide range of important concepts, aspects, and attributes within life that can be seen in astrology, including concentration, effort, perseverance, time, consequences, old age, authority, discipline, work ethic, life lessons, and karma. It rules the signs of Capricorn and Aquarius and is noted for taking a total of 28-30 years to complete its orbit.

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✧Saturn in the 1st house✧

Dealing with Saturn in the natal chart is never easy, as it is known as the Greater Malefic for a reason. When Saturn is placed in the first house, it gains strength and influence over your life. This placement indicates that your childhood was not as carefree as that other children, this could be especially when it comes to your peers and/or your siblings. You may have had to mature quickly. Your parents expected you to take responsibility for things that a child cannot, and this caused you to experience limitations and hardships. Individuals with Saturn in the first house are also extremely critical of themselves. They may possess a reserved or cautious disposition in social gatherings and exhibit a strong inclination toward maintaining structure and order in their daily lives. This placement may also bring challenges and obstacles to the individual's sense of self-identity. However, with consistent hard work and perseverance, they can effectively conquer these hurdles and gradually cultivate a strong sense of self.

As an individual with Saturn in the first house, you may have been a timid child and have found it challenging to be spontaneous or feel at ease around others. When encountering a new situation, you tend to approach it with indefinable skepticism and challenge its foundations. You are wary of situations and people, uncovering their machinery step-by-step, and if necessary, dispute them uncompromisingly. People may perceive you as serious and reserved, which can be difficult when trying to make friends or to feel accepted. These perceptions may lead to a diminished sense of self-worth, which can be reinforced by the reactions of others. As you gain more life experience, you will conquer these challenges and enhance your confidence. Surrounding yourself with supportive and understanding individuals can be immensely beneficial in this situation. It is important to choose those who will encourage you to become the best version of yourself rather than force you further down in the covert guise of wanting "what's best for you". Your sense of what's right and what's wrong is stronger than most, so unless you value and respect someone's then I wouldn't recommended taking their advice.

Your appearance and identity are likely closely tied to your status in society. Regardless of your size, complexion and general expression and appearance, it may not have been easy for you to walk through this world earlier in life. This could mark you for a special purpose or destiny. Such a feeling can weigh heavily on you and may prompt you to be ambitious and assume loads of responsibility and leadership at an early age. However, it may also cause you to move through life with a heavy heart and a chip on your shoulder. You might take your life and yourself too seriously and lament that others, especially adults when you were younger, don't live up to their ideals. Because Saturn is related to the 10th and 11th house, respectively, its position in the 1st house suggest you might've been in the public eye since a very young age or you're part of a generational pathology of some sorts that is related to public image, money, business or belonging to an all around strong and influential family.

The first house represents your childhood. Saturn in the first house suggests that you didn't have one, or at least it wasn't perfect or easy, as you were likely seen as the family pillar. You assume the role of provider, both emotionally and literally, very early on. However, if you can't be a child, you won't be able to be an adult later on. Saturn in the first house indicates that you did not have enough time to mature, engage in romantic relationships, or have fun with your friends. You may not have had any friends at all. This could suggest that you experience feelings of anxiety and guilt. Saturn represents your innermost fears, and with it placed in the first house, these apprehensions may be deeply ingrained within you.

People with Saturn in the first house usually had strict parents. With this placement, your relationship with your parents was rarely smooth. When you were a child, you often perceived them as cold and emotionally unavailable. Saturn in the first house people frequently have a parent who has unrealistic expectations and is very strict. You frequently felt judged, and in some cases, you learned to be a harsh judge of yourself as well. Your parent or someone you saw as an authority figure as a child was most likely conservative and traditional and desired to raise you by these principles.

As you mature, you can learn to lighten up and laugh at life and everyone's foibles, including your own. Saturn in the first house teaches you to rely on yourself. Often, you can't rely on anyone except yourself, and rarely on your family. People with Saturn in the first house often had to mature at a young age. Perhaps their family expected them to care for a family member, and Saturn's position in the natal chart placed a heavy burden on their shoulders. The benefit of Saturn in the first house is that you learned self-control and persistence, which will serve you well later in life. You've grown accustomed to hard work and aren't afraid of it.

Being emotionally stunted and being detached are one the hardest lessons you'll have to tackle under Saturn, as it is a survival tactic you had to develop to be able survive yet at some point it won't serve you anymore, as it would in fact harm you later in life. As you heal with time and self work, the sensitive child within you will have it's time to heal and shine. The biggest lesson you'll learn in life is to be able to have a healthy and sustainable a sense of self.

✧Saturn in the 2nd house✧

The planet Saturn is a challenging presence in one's natal chart. It reveals the karmic lessons that must be learned during this lifetime. If your natal Saturn is in the second house, you must master the art of being self-reliant and working hard. Eventually, you will have to confront your fears and challenges. People with Saturn in the second house are often afraid of financial and material scarcity. They fear being left without any assets to rely on. As a result, they tend to be very frugal with their resources. However, Saturn in the second house also brings a strong sense of responsibility and discipline when it comes to managing finances and possessions. This placement may lead to challenges and delays in accumulating wealth, but with patience and perseverance, financial stability and security can still be achieved. It is important to strike a balance between saving and enjoying the fruits of one's labor, and not become overly attached to material possessions. Saturn in the second house can bring a practical and grounded approach to managing resources and building a solid foundation for the future.

The position of Saturn in the second house of an individual's chart is a significant indicator of long-term financial security. It suggests that nothing is certain and that what one possesses today may be lost tomorrow. Consequently, money becomes a top priority for those with this placement, instilling in them a reluctance to spend irrationally and instead directing their focus towards saving and investing for the future. While Saturn's placement in the second house can bring about prosperity during later years of life, thanks to responsible financial habits, it also represents a fear of losing material possessions and wealth. This fear can sometimes lead to setbacks, even for those who are extremely affluent. This can be a challenging lesson, but Saturn's ways of making money are often obtained through honesty, hard work, perseverance, and consistency. Building up experience over time can also help you become financially successful. Individuals with this placement understand that success is a product of hard work and determination, but Saturn's anxieties are often deeply seeded and require significant effort to overcome. It is imperative to remember that Saturn's challenges tend to subside after one's Saturn return, as they become older and more experienced.

From your childhood to young adult years, you had to learn how to live with minimal help. There may have been a lack of available resources or you had to start working at a young age. This often indicates that you may have come from a less privileged background. Growing up, you may have felt a sense of lack and learned to work hard for what you needed, rather than asking for it. This can sometimes lead to low self-esteem, as you may have compared yourself to others who had more. This can make it difficult for you to charge for what you earned or ask for money, as you may not believe that you are worth it. However, it is important to learn to value yourself more and work on your self-esteem. Remember, there are no get-rich-quick schemes with Saturn in the second house. It may take time and effort, but with dedication and persistence, you can overcome any financial obstacles. Saturn may delay, but it is never denied.

Saturn's biggest lesson for you is that you're worth it. Regardless of what you have, how much you earn, and what you do and don't do with your money and time, you're worthy of being loved, of being appreciated, of being happy.

✧Saturn in the 3rd house✧

Having Saturn in the 3rd house often indicates a serious and disciplined approach to communication and learning. This placement may suggest a cautious or reserved attitude towards expressing oneself and a tendency towards self-criticism or perfectionism in intellectual pursuits.

Saturn in astrology represents constraints, impediments, and delays. Wherever Saturn appears, one can expect to face struggles in some way. People with Saturn in the third house may have difficulty connecting with others, as Saturn represents blockages in this life area, which is the house of communication. Learning to communicate can be a challenging task for them. Their mode of assimilation is demanding and selective, which excludes simple relationships and fanciful innovations. Before accepting a person, an idea, or a formula, they need to sift them through their inflexible will and understand them. They sort out all pieces of information with a serious mind, but also with caution and skepticism.

People with Saturn in the third house may face speech impediments, require hearing aids, or need specialized education. They may struggle with difficult sibling relationships or experience delays in their education. They may also find it challenging to engage in small talk or make friends, especially with those who live nearby. These individuals may feel uncomfortable around strangers and acquaintances, and they may not be well-known in the community. Childhood scars may have a greater influence on them, and they may remember their immediate surroundings as being cold and depressing, especially when they were younger.

Individuals who have Saturn in their third house often struggle with their interactions with the outside world and may feel insecure about it. Short trips can still be challenging and exhausting. As a child, they may have been teased by their peers, and they may have communication or speech problems. They may find it difficult to speak up, and their thought process may require more time to process information. However, this placement suggests that an individual may frequently beat themselves up over past events. It is crucial to consciously shift focus to the present and future, which are areas where one has control. The third house represents elementary school years and relationships with peers, teachers, and acquaintances. Therefore, Saturn in this house may indicate difficulty in school, whether it be learning or socializing. As a child, one may have felt lonely and misunderstood, struggling to share their ideas with others. They may have had difficulty connecting with relatives, including siblings, and avoided meeting new people. Their minds work slowly but steadily, and they need to organize their thoughts to learn effectively. It is important to note that these challenges do not indicate a lack of intelligence but rather a much thorough mind. In astrology, Mercury and the third house describe an individual's mental abilities. Those with Saturn in the third house have a unique way of thinking and are capable of solving difficult problems and testing out theories, they're also endowed with a great memory.

The good news is that problems with Saturn usually improve after one's Saturn return. In time these individuals become more self-assured in their interactions with people in their neighborhood and local community as they can overcome obstacles. With dedication and effort, this placement can also bring rewards in terms of increased mental clarity, focus, and mastery of skills. It may also indicate a need to establish clear boundaries or structure in one's relationships with siblings, neighbors, or other close contacts. but with effort. Another benefit of Saturn in the third house is the ability to keep secrets, getting the truth, interrogating, and keeping track of information making them ideal to work with sensitive information, as a detective, a judge, or possibly even politics and the military.

Learning that you have the right to hold court and to speak your mind is Saturn's biggest lesson here.

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✧Saturn in the 4th house✧

Having Saturn in the fourth house can be challenging. Saturn represents limitations and difficulties, making it a challenging planet. People who have this placement are often from families that are emotionally distant. As a child, you may have felt like you couldn't get the love and attention you needed from your parents. This placement is associated with inner insecurity and delays in energy, causing roadblocks and obstacles in life. The fourth house is related to home and family, and people with Saturn in this house typically come from families where they didn't receive emotional nurturing. This placement can indicate a karmic task related to one of your parents, typically the nurturing one, and these relationships are rarely easy. Saturn in the fourth house can bring challenges related to family and home life and may indicate a difficult or restrictive upbringing with a heavy emphasis on duty and responsibility. You have a highly selective attitude, seeking a personal world devoid of compromise. Saturn in the fourth house is associated with childhood issues and difficulties growing up and may have resulted in poor living conditions. However, with hard work and discipline, this placement can also bring a strong foundation and deep sense of security in the home.

People with this placement may have a strong connection to tradition and a desire for stability and structure in their domestic and private lives. Although you may have gone through difficult times as a child or had to flee a strict or traditional family, setting your sights on worldly success with determination and grit, the pull of the past may keep a firm grip on you. It may cause difficulty finding mentor figures or receiving support from others, but if you can honor your independence and remain optimistic, you will eventually gain the momentum and progress you seek.

When Saturn is in your fourth house, it means that you share a karmic bond with your mother or the more nurturing parent. This bond can be quite challenging to handle and may require significant time and effort to resolve in your lifetime. You may need to help your parents at some point in your life. The fourth house signifies your ancestors and family karma, as well as your astrological roots. Saturn is a planet of the past and karmic in the birth chart, so when it collides with the fourth house, you may need to work out some issues before you can move forward. The fourth house also represents endings, such as your final years and what you can expect during old age. Having Saturn in the fourth house may lead to loneliness, restrictions, or poverty in old age, so it's important to develop self-control and confront the past. Once you have healed from past scars, you can live the life you want, rather than what your subconscious beliefs tell you. The way a planet's sign and aspects influence its manifestation is always significant. If Saturn receives harmonious aspects, it may be easier for you to learn the lessons your soul needs to learn in this lifetime. The fourth house also represents your home country and where you grew up. Some planets in the fourth house have an emotional impact on you. People with Saturn in the fourth house may work in real estate or agriculture and have an attachment to the past. They could be collectors who struggle to let go of their possessions, or they may want to return to their childhood home. Saturn's conservatism in this area is not necessarily a bad thing unless it's combined with a lack of understanding. This may result in rigid viewpoints and difficulty understanding where others are coming from. You may also try to impose your beliefs on others. Being nostalgic is not a bad thing, but it's essential to remember that the past was not always easy or better and learn to live in the present moment.

Saturn is not only the planet of the past but also the planet of responsibility. People with Saturn in the fourth house often feel responsible for their family's events, and when things go wrong, they tend to blame themselves. This placement indicates that you're very attached to the past and may torture yourself in the present with things from the past. If Saturn is in the fourth house, your parents or guardians were most likely strict. You may have learned to be harsh on yourself and others. This placement describes a disciplinarian upbringing, where you felt your parents didn't understand you and couldn't love you properly. People with Saturn in the fourth house often have a significant fear of losing their property or home, as well as their family members, whether it's through death or emotional loss. When it comes to building your own home, Saturn can be a constraint, and you may have to fight for a place to live. In some cases, Saturn in the fourth house can lead to a long life. Although those with Saturn in the fourth house may face complex challenges in their family and home life, they can create a solid foundation for themselves and their loved ones by being determined and willing to confront challenges head-on.

✧Saturn in the 5th house✧

The placement of Saturn in the fifth house of a person's birth chart signifies that they may encounter challenges and difficulties regarding their love life, creative expression, and relationships with children. Such individuals may have to put in more effort than usual to achieve success in these areas. Saturn's influence can lead to self-doubt and insecurity, and a tendency towards being overly critical of oneself and others. However, with patience and dedication, Saturn in the fifth house can bring discipline and mastery in creative pursuits and a deeper understanding of the responsibilities and joys of parenthood.

People with Saturn in the fifth house are not frivolous when it comes to love, childhood, or creativity; they are complex and selective. They seek genuine passion and creativity and are prone to doubt and questioning. Childhood memories usually involve a strict education that adheres to established rules. The fifth house is known as the House of Joy, while Saturn desires work, self-discipline, rules, and structure. The clash between these two entities can create difficulties in the areas of life represented by the fifth house. Saturn in the fifth house can make a person serious and in charge of everything, limiting their ability to connect with their inner child and experience a state of flow. They might feel guilty and ashamed of expressing themselves and be self-conscious.

People with Saturn in the fifth house tend to be productive, even in their spare time, and find it difficult to unwind and enjoy themselves. However, taking art classes or pursuing creative hobbies can be beneficial, as it can help them get to know themselves better and let go. Saturn desires structure in art, and after the age of 30, people with this placement tend to enjoy life more in the second half of their lives. With effort and determination, they can overcome the challenges posed by Saturn and pursue their interests with passion and discipline.

The fifth house is commonly associated with romance, flirting, and enjoying the company of others. However, if Saturn is present in this house, it can cause delays and a lack of dating opportunities. This may result in a person entering into romantic relationships later in life or feeling a sense of guilt or pressure associated with dating. There may also be insecurities about attractiveness and social skills, leading to difficulty with flirting or dating. Once a partner is found, however, they are likely to stay committed to a solid relationship. These natives tend to take romance seriously and may prefer relationships that lead to long-term commitments. Their love life typically improves after the age of thirty, when the person becomes more carefree and spontaneous. The fifth house also represents children and parenting. With Saturn in this house, it may take longer to become a parent, and there may be a strong sense of responsibility towards one's children. Becoming a parent can lead to increased self-discipline and maturity for both the parent and the child.

✧Saturn in the 6th house✧

Saturn is a valuable planet in our solar system. It embodies order, structure, and discipline, all of which are beneficial in the sixth house. This astrological house is associated with work, health, and daily routines, and in this article, we will explore how Saturn influences each of these areas. Those with Saturn in the sixth house are diligent, hardworking, and often feel a strong sense of obligation. As the sixth house is the house of service in astrology, this trait is not surprising. Saturn's placement in the sixth house can create a sense of responsibility towards work and health, with a need for structure and discipline in daily routines. This can sometimes lead to perfectionism and self-criticism, with a focus on maintaining physical and mental well-being. However, Saturn's influence, hard work, and dedication can also lead to success and mastery in one's chosen field.

Individuals with this placement may experience some challenges. They may feel separate from their coworkers, struggle to fit into the office environment, and prefer to work independently. They may also feel run down and tired due to the constant workload. However, their character is serious, and they approach their daily tasks with meticulous attention to detail. Their integrity is highly appreciated in the professional arena, and they prefer to speak the truth rather than make shaky compromises. At times, this intransigent image may result in negative consequences.

While Saturn in the sixth house emphasizes the importance of work in one's life, it is essential to find a balance. People with this placement tend to work hard throughout their lives, and they are extremely self-disciplined. They may be workaholics, but success usually comes later in life due to Saturn's slow and steady growth. Despite the insecurities that Saturn can bring, those with this placement are often concerned with making a positive impact on the world.

It is common for those with Saturn in the sixth house to undervalue themselves and feel underappreciated by their boss. However, their sense of duty keeps them working hard, and with time and confidence, they may receive the recognition they deserve. They are well-suited for service-oriented fields, such as healthcare or social work, and can also support their coworkers by sharing their knowledge and problem-solving skills. Saturn's placement in the sixth house offers an opportunity to pay back karma through work. The sign of Saturn reveals more about one's karma.

Individuals with Saturn in the sixth house place a high value on routines and stick to them regardless of circumstances. Once they integrate something into their daily routine, it is highly likely to remain there. These individuals are typically loyal to their workplace and do not switch jobs unless necessary. They enjoy structure and organization, preferring to spend their days in a structured and organized manner. Moreover, they do not like changing their routines, not only at work but also in their personal lives. They have a specific plan for how everything should proceed on a good day and tend to enjoy repetition and planning ahead.

This placement also implies that they have to take care of their bodies, more so than others. Saturn in the sixth house may cause chronic illnesses, as it slows and prolongs everything. Consequently, individuals with this placement may experience pain in their bones and knees and may also have dry skin or digestive issues. However, with self-discipline and perseverance, they can adopt healthy habits and lifestyles.

Individuals with Saturn in the sixth house may also be prone to anxiety, especially if Virgo is prominent in their natal chart. They tend to worry about things that may never happen. Nonetheless, they can develop healthy habits and be disciplined in taking care of themselves, which should alleviate their anxiety.

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✧Saturn in the 7th house✧

Saturn, in astrology, is known for its serious, responsible, and confining energy. When Saturn is in the seventh house of a natal chart, it affects the area of committed, one-on-one relationships, including both marriage and business partnerships. People with Saturn in the seventh house take their relationships very seriously. Relationships are not just a part of their life but where they have karmic lessons to learn in this lifetime. However, Saturn in the 7th house can also create challenges in partnerships and relationships, leading to a sense of responsibility and duty towards one's significant other, but also a feeling of restriction or limitation in personal freedom. It is essential to learn how to balance one's own needs with those of their partner and communicate openly and honestly to avoid misunderstandings. With effort and patience, this placement can lead to growth and maturity in relationships.

This configuration predisposes to some degree of rigor in human relations, associations, or within the couple. It may not be easy to link up with the world and blend in, but steady honesty works wonders once confidence has dispelled any reluctance and modesty. However, people should never cheat on someone with this placement. One might always feel like the challenger in a world of defending champions. At their best, this constant positioning forges their will, patience, and determination into a stainless-steel quality and nature. While they may be tough and cranky at times, their toughness also makes them reliable. Others can trust them with a great deal, especially if they allow themselves to be governed by fair-minded principles and ideals.

At their worst, they allow life's school of hard knocks to give them a degree of cynicism with honorable mentions in bitterness. Then they'll discover there are fewer and fewer people willing to give them a shot at more as they mature. The world does not owe them anything, but they do owe the world as much as they have to offer. The more they offer what's of lasting value, the longer more of them will exist in the world.

People with Saturn in their seventh house are drawn to serious individuals with serious plans for the future. They seek a long-term, committed relationship. However, Saturn is also associated with limitations and impediments, meaning they are more likely to meet their ideal partner later in life. Additionally, their partners may be significantly older than them and are usually successful in life. These individuals tend to be very shy when young, and their relationship with a parent is often at the root of this. They have a small circle of committed friends rather than a larger circle of shallow friendships, and their friendships tend to last a long time. They are dependable and protective friends, usually meeting their friends at work or in a business setting. They may even meet their future partner this way. While they may struggle in the corresponding life areas in the beginning, they can become a master here later in life, usually after their first Saturn return, around the age of 28-30.

In the realm of astrology, Saturn is widely associated with patience and time. This celestial body is known for embodying life lessons, discipline, and perseverance, but it also tends to evoke fear. For those whose natal chart places Saturn in the seventh house, it is common to experience trust issues and fear abandonment in relationships due to past experiences. This can manifest as a fear of intimacy and a tendency to choose partners who may not be the best fit. Furthermore, childhood issues with a parent can also have a significant impact on adult relationships. Despite these challenges, individuals with Saturn in the seventh house tend to take relationships very seriously and highly value loyalty and accountability. A well-aspected Saturn can lead to a mature and long-lasting marriage, whereas negative aspects may result in a difficult union. Overall, Saturn's placement in the seventh house suggests that relationships will develop at a steady and deliberate pace, even if they come with certain limitations. Saturn in the seventh can also indicate marrying someone powerful, wealthy, intelligent, or may be the head of a business, institute, or act as a member of a board. If Saturn here is in aspect to Pluto then it could indicate marrying into a royalty, presidency, or any person with powerful familial connections.

✧Saturn in the 8th house✧

The placement of Saturn in the eighth house of a birth chart is a fascinating one. This planet, representing life lessons and karma, is found in a house that strongly influences karma. While it is true that this position has karmic implications, it also has other meanings.

Individuals with Saturn in the eighth house often struggle with establishing intimate relationships. Maintaining strict boundaries in intimate relationships, such as keeping separate bank accounts, may be a pattern for those with Saturn in the eighth house. This placement may result in a lack of commitment or an inability to connect deeply with partners. Such individuals may feel cut off from their instincts, gut feelings, and deeper energy. They may set clear boundaries between themselves and others, leading to a hardened and rigid sense of gut. Fear of losing control of their power may also lead them to hide their abilities and avoid deep transformation. This placement may also result in barriers to intimacy and to transformation due to taking things too seriously.

In your natal chart, the placement of Saturn in the 8th House can indicate a negative reputation. This is because Saturn is associated with fears, limitations, and restrictions, and its placement in the sector of death, inheritances, and destructions can lead to unconscious manifestations of these effects. The 8th House is also linked to hidden secrets and problems that require dedication to uncover. People with Saturn in the 8th House often have difficulty recognizing their fears, but this placement can also lead to a deep understanding of life, death, and transformation. While Saturn struggles with the emotional intensity associated with water houses, overcoming its challenges can lead to a talent for healing and an ability to see into the soul. Ultimately, facing the challenges of Saturn in the 8th House can lead to radical transformations and a deeper understanding of oneself and others.

Individuals with Saturn in the eighth house may experience a reluctance towards intimacy. Although the eighth house is associated with sex, those with this placement view it as a mysterious bond rather than an instinctual act. Emotional intimacy issues often prevent these individuals from achieving a close connection with their partner. While some may experience physical limitations, the root cause is typically apprehension towards vulnerability. Some choose to avoid commitment altogether, despite appearing to have a high sex drive and engaging in promiscuous behavior. You may marry someone who leads you into debt. It's important to establish boundaries in intimacy, including setting rules for professional intimate relationships. By mastering intimate relationships, you can maintain a healthy balance in your personal and professional life.

People with this placement go through karmic relationships that involve lessons learned in intimacy. It touches upon the issue of limited sexual options and partners, as well as difficulty in forming deep connections with others. There may be a period of celibacy, whether it is voluntary or not, and the possibility of feeling like an incel. Saturn in the 8th might suggest that you're withholding your sexuality from others by restricting and conserving your sexual energy. You control your sexual urges, it doesn't control you. You may be picky when it comes to choosing an intimate partner. Learning to master your sexual energy, accepting intimate experiences, and trusting your gut will help you establish a better trajectory for yourself in love. Put your foot down, stop unwanted advances, and learn who is and is not right for you, and who is to have your energy. Despite what toxic optimists say, not everyone is right for you, and not every lesson needs to be learned in pain. You can grow in greater ways by learning slowly and from a nurturing environment rather than traumatizing yourself. A tree grows much more solid with time, while iron that has been through the test of flames will rust and decay.

If Saturn is in the eighth house, it may suggest that marriage may bring financial shortages and that there are limitations to your partner's income due to a fear of intimacy. Some people are in relationships where they feel misunderstood by their partner, leading to financial demands as a means of revenge after a divorce. This can result in the loss of money, assets being frozen, or payments of alimony or child support. Such situations can be detrimental to the relationship and should be addressed.

Your birth chart's Saturn placement indicates areas in which you need to focus your efforts. Specifically, if you have Saturn in the eighth house, you need to learn to manage your deep emotions. If you're willing to work hard on these issues, Saturn will reward you. People with Saturn in the eighth house often have a talent for handling money, making it an ideal placement for bankers, tax advisors, or accountants. However, this placement also comes with financial risks, such as those that can arise from relatives, spouses, taxes, loans, or business partners. Understanding human nature is crucial when dealing with finances, especially in relationships or marriages, where the loss of financial assets during breakups or divorces is common. Individuals with Saturn in the eighth house may have a mastery of psychology and may benefit from lessons in psychotherapy. Shedding outworn rules and regulations is necessary for them to grow.

The eighth house represents joint assets, such as those from marriage or inheritance, but Saturn's influence can limit these assets. Inheritance battles may be necessary, and it's important to be aware of the fine print in intimate relationships. Saturn's influence in the eighth house emphasizes the need for formality and caution in these situations, as carelessness or naivety can lead to cycles of abuse or manipulation. These natives may find themselves as the will and estate executor.

This placement brings challenges and obstacles in areas of shared resources, intimacy, and inheritance. However, with hard work and perseverance, it can also bring profound growth, inner strength, and resilience. Individuals with this placement can benefit from confronting their fears and facing their shadow selves, leading to a greater sense of empowerment and understanding of the mysteries of life and death. It is essential to note that not all fears are justified, and some may be holding individuals back.

✧Saturn in the 9th house✧

The ninth house is the house of the abstract mind in astrology. Saturn, the planet of material things, isn't quite at home here. If Saturn is in the ninth house, you may need more time to process new information than others. This does not imply a lack of intelligence; rather, it indicates a lack of structure and discipline in your beliefs and philosophies. Religion, education, and travel may be taken more seriously and maturely by you than by others. The disadvantage is that you may encounter challenges or delays when pursuing higher education or long-distance travel. Nonetheless, with dedication and perseverance, you can achieve your academic or spiritual objectives.

You may also have a strong appreciation for tradition and cultural heritage, but it's critical that you don't become too rigid or dogmatic in your beliefs. The distinction between conservative rigidity and intolerance, as well as seriousness and austerity, is extremely thin. You value honesty both intellectually and morally. You do not pretend to be knowledgeable, and you value open relationships, even if it means making sacrifices.

The ninth house is associated with philosophy and your worldview. Saturn in the ninth house people have a strict moral code, may be religious, or express their own opinions. You can gradually change your philosophical viewpoints, but you need proof that you can rely on something. You prefer a structured view of the world and find it difficult to broaden your horizons. If Saturn is afflicted in your natal chart, you may seek external validation for your ideas and be wary of challenging authority figures.

Saturn seeks stability and structure, whereas the ninth house represents expanding one's horizons. People with Saturn in their natal chart may be resistant to change and fearful of new perspectives, especially if Saturn receives challenging aspects. Some people, on the other hand, may be drawn to foreign cultures, devoting time and effort to learning new languages. As you get older, you may find yourself traveling more and interacting with people from other countries. When traveling, you prefer to plan ahead of time and be organized.

Higher education is also represented by the ninth house. Some people with Saturn in the ninth house may have been unable to attend college or studied later or for a longer period of time than others. When Saturn is blessed with harmonious aspects, it may indicate a career in higher education or research. Saturn represents endurance, persistence, and a willingness to work hard, making it an excellent sign for a career in education or research. You are a structured thinker who views the problem holistically, and you do not trust new ideas until they have been tested. When you learn something, it sticks with you, and you effectively manage your mental assets. As a teacher, you have a strong sense of responsibility for your students, and you are strict but fair, like Saturn. If you had Saturn in the ninth house as a student, you may have been afraid of authority figures and asking questions, fearing appearing stupid or being mocked.

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✧Saturn in the 10th house✧

When Saturn is placed in the tenth house it describes you as someone who possesses strong self-discipline and determination. You command respect from those around you and are well-regarded in your community. Career-wise, you hold yourself to high standards and have lofty ambitions. Your work ethic is unparalleled, especially if Saturn is in an earth sign. Responsibility comes naturally to you and you have a realistic outlook on life. With Saturn in the tenth house, you are grounded and focused on stability in your professional life. You maintain an authentic public identity and reputation and are aware of the limited time you have to achieve your goals. You have likely faced setbacks in the public eye, which has honed your public identity and professionalism. You are someone who commands great respect and sets an example for others in your profession. While others may have the luxury of slacking off, you uphold rules and codes of conduct and take your work very seriously. Your persistence and ability to handle pressure will eventually lead you to the top.

Your relationship with authority figures in your life can be revealed by examining the tenth house and Saturn. When Saturn is in the tenth house, it may indicate the presence of a strict parental figure, usually the father. Saturn's influence may have taught you discipline and persistence, which can be beneficial for achieving success later in life. However, the strict upbringing may have also resulted in perceiving this parent as cold and emotionally unavailable. It's possible that one or both parents held notable authority or were powerful individuals, with rigid expectations that you had to live up to. This may have included following their rules, acting mature and responsible, or even living out their unfulfilled goals and wishes, regardless of your own desires. As a result, you may have matured quickly and become wise beyond your years, ambitious, hardworking, and professional from a young age. You may have even started working very early in life, such as becoming a child actor or entertainer. Your upbringing may have also made you desire to leave a mark on the world and influence it.

Being afraid of or having an absent parent may have forced you to learn to be emotionally self-sufficient and mature ahead of your time. Your relationship with your parents serves as the foundation for all of your other relationships, including those with your partner, children, friends, employer, and coworkers. A conflicted relationship with authority figures may be indicated by Saturn in the tenth house, leading you to feel like you cannot rely on them.

Saturn in the tenth house indicates that you are determined to achieve your goals, no matter how much effort it takes. You are willing to work hard, even if it means staying up until the wee hours of the morning. People with Saturn in the tenth understand that success comes with time and effort. They have lofty goals in life and want to be known for their work. However, they are prone to overworking and need to learn how to take breaks. You may also have tendencies toward being a control freak. However, with time and experience, you will become increasingly successful. Success in this area usually comes later in life, usually after your Saturn return. Many people with this placement may have had low self-confidence when they were younger, which in turn they compensate for as they get older by working more than everyone else.

The placement of planets in the tenth house can be a great indicator of one's career path. It can provide insight into the profession that may be best suited for an individual, as well as what experiences they may encounter in their professional life. Saturn in this house is in accidental dignity and is traditionally associated with Capricorn, a zodiac sign ruled by Saturn. People In regards to your career, Saturn in the tenth house often works in fields that require perseverance, long hours, and the ability to climb the ladder. As a governing planet of hierarchy, structure, and organizations in astrology, Saturn's influence in your professional life may lead you to value these aspects. This placement may also indicate a career in government, where a great deal of responsibility is often placed on your shoulders.

With Saturn in the tenth house, your vocation may involve investing in long-term projects and deepening your knowledge, rather than being swayed by momentary illusions. While you may be criticized for your rigorous, austere, and realistic personality traits, your capacity for self-reflection and learning from setbacks are assets that can benefit you greatly in your professional life. Though you may show your qualities later than others, your tenacity and demanding nature enable you to grow despite setbacks and failures. When well-aspected, this placement endows you with seriousness and reliability that your colleagues and acquaintances will acknowledge and respect.

You may have had to rely on yourself or your family to succeed, and as a result, you place a great deal of value on your reputation and status. People may look up to you as a leader, particularly if they have seen you rise from humble beginnings. However, it's essential to remember that leadership requires grace and character when stepping down, just as much as it does grit and determination while climbing the ladder.

People with Saturn in the tenth house often excel in science, research, or teaching careers. This placement also makes for an excellent manager, as it allows you to bring structure to an organization. While success may be slow in coming, Saturn's rewards are permanent and can lead to lasting success.

The tenth house and the sign on its cusp reveal how others tend to perceive you. This perception can often be influenced by any planetary placement in this house. If you have planets in the tenth house, you may be well-known in your community due to your professional accomplishments. However, if Saturn is also present, you may not enjoy being in the spotlight. While you may gain notoriety, it may not come naturally to you and you may need to learn how to deal with it. During your younger years, you may be shy and awkward. Saturn in the tenth house can cause others to see you as strict, hardworking, and serious. You may be well-liked and respected in your community, but at the same time, viewed as cold and distant. Despite being known by many, you may not be particularly close to them. If Saturn is aspected negatively in your natal chart, you may become arrogant and insensitive.

✧Saturn in the 11th house✧

Saturn is familiar with the eleventh house as it is associated with Aquarius, which was previously ruled by Saturn before the discovery of Uranus. Individuals with Saturn in the eleventh house may feel lonely in social situations, particularly during their younger years, and may have difficulty making friends due to a lack of like-minded individuals. Connecting with large groups of people is also challenging for those with this natal chart placement, and they may be late bloomers when it comes to socializing. This is because they may have misused their talents or experienced suppression in the past, leading to difficulty in this aspect of life. Social anxiety is common among those with Saturn in the eleventh house, leading to caution around others and a lack of self-confidence. Some may avoid social situations altogether, while others may overcompensate and try extremely hard to fit in. Success in the professional realm may also come later in life, as individuals with this placement tend to prefer staying in the background, missing out on potential opportunities that come through others.

Although the eleventh house pertains to friendship, it doesn't pertain to close friendships, but rather to impersonal and casual friendships or your social circle. If Saturn is in the eleventh house, it indicates that you tend to be quiet and reserved in social situations. You have a reserved personality type, which means that you require a significant amount of time to be yourself in any group, and even then, you are rarely the center of attention. Peer recognition is usually lacking in your life, and you may sometimes feel invisible as if no one hears you in a crowd. You frequently feel as if you don't belong anywhere.

If Saturn receives challenging aspects, you may become arrogant or develop a dislike for networking. Learning to be dependable and genuine while remaining self-confident is a significant challenge with this placement. However, you must learn how to have a healthy relationship with groups and how to behave in your social circle during this lifetime. This is not to say you're a bad friend. You are not: People with Saturn in the eleventh house are caring and loyal once they become close to someone. You feel responsible for your friends, and your friendships typically endure. You can give love and affection, but you may struggle to accept it, resulting in an imbalance in your relationships.

People with Saturn in the eleventh house frequently have older friends, and the groups and organizations they belong to are usually exclusive or only permitted for upper echelons. These organizations tend to be formal, with a dress code and strict rules. Some examples include AARP or the Soho. A group of professionals or business people, and traditional groups with outstanding panels, rings of accountability, wise orders, gulf clubs, country clubs, conscience councils, or gathering duties. This person is interested in being part of a secret society or even to be an aristocrat.

When you have Saturn in the eleventh house, you tend to withdraw from the crowd and surround yourself with serious, solemn, and mature individuals. You prefer organizations for the mature and feel that an old friendship should not be traded for a superficial, short-lived relationship. Instead, you carefully select your friends and keep them for a long time, as you need loyal friends to build long-term projects. As you get older, you often make younger friends, and friendships are frequently formed in the workplace. This planet emphasizes the significance of professional networking, and depending on your Saturn sign, you may work best in business groups and associations.

The eleventh house in astrology also represents hopes and dreams and how they materialize and income from your profession. Saturn's influence in this house brings stability, but financial gains earned through hard work may be postponed. However, as you age, your financial situation is likely to improve. People with Saturn in the eleventh house tend to focus on long-term goals and prefer a consistent approach to making money instead of quick and unstable methods. Saturn rewards hard work, but it is not a planet of instant gratification. Individuals with this placement may have a hard time believing in their ability to achieve their goals due to a fear of failure. However, the eleventh house is also associated with humanitarian ideals, and helping others can improve Saturn's influence. Volunteering is an excellent way to contribute to those in need and share your knowledge, experience, creativity, time, or money. Remember, everyone has something to offer, and we can all make a difference.

✧Saturn in the 12th house✧

If Saturn is in your twelfth house in astrology, it suggests that a lot is happening beneath the surface. Saturn is known as the planet of obstacles and challenges, while the twelfth house is associated with dissolution. Consequently, it can be challenging to relax and let go, and you may frequently feel lonely or trapped. Those with Saturn in the twelfth house often struggle to forgive themselves and may be trapped in the past. Empathy and forgiveness are essential, but it can be difficult to access your unconscious and imaginative world. This placement may indicate difficulty remembering dreams or experiencing insomnia.

Individuals with Saturn in their twelfth house may be withdrawn, withhold from themselves, and have a serious approach to spiritual life. They may struggle with personal freedom and may need to learn how to structure their time and create support systems. Saturn in the twelfth house can lead to self-imposed limitations, but it is essential to master your fears and expand in a confined space. This placement may also indicate missing a father figure and difficulty with vulnerability.

People with Saturn in their twelfth house benefit from spending time alone and may work in isolated settings, such as hospitals, prisons, or as researchers. Volunteering and charitable work can be fulfilling, as the Twelfth House is about selfless service. Additionally, Saturn in the twelfth house may indicate the need to travel to distant countries for work.

If Saturn is in the twelfth house, it shows that you struggle with letting go of things. You tend to hold onto things and often berate yourself for things that happened a long time ago that you cannot change. You don't like feeling overwhelmed by emotions, so you tend to repress them. Sometimes, you may not even be aware of what you are feeling. You push your emotions away rather than allowing them to go away on their own. This can lead to hidden pain that you are not aware of, causing you to suffer greatly. You may feel depressed all the time, and Saturn's influence can manifest as frequent melancholy. You may also experience panic attacks or anxiety. If you have planets in the twelfth house, psychotherapy can be very helpful. You may not be interested in spiritual beliefs and prefer to focus on the realities of life. This can lead to an interest in dark, tedious, or secret works. You may be an introverted person who gives up your social life for spirituality. Over time, you may become more open to spirituality after your Saturn return.

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Byee Bissshhh

#astrology #astro observations #astro notes #astrology observations #astrology notes #saturn #astrology houses #saturn in the 1st house #saturn in the 2nd house #saturn in the 3rd house #saturn in the 4th house #saturn in the 5th house #saturn in the 6th house #saturn in the 7th house #saturn in the 8th house #saturn in the 9th house #saturn in the 10th house #saturn in the 11th house #saturn in the 12th house

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uvobreakmylegs · 9 months ago

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As Fate Would Have it

red thread of fate soulmate! AU with Razor x reader

this fic now has a Part 2 written by @hypnoswrites! please read Man-Made Destiny once you've read this part!

Warnings: kidnapping, mentions of death

Word Count: 12.2k words

He hadn't said anything to you.

After returning to your hotel room only to immediately be jumped by the man who had clearly been laying in wait for you, he had yet to utter a single word, instead staying quiet through the process of grabbing and restraining you. Even when you had tried to kick and scream when you realized that you were being attacked, he didn't explain anything or mutter out any curses when you were successful in hitting him a few times. Not even to mock you when it was clear that you were lacking the strength needed to do any sort of damage to him.

It was only for a short period of time that your limbs were free, and now you were laying on the hotel bed, your wrists bound behind your back, your ankles tied together and a washcloth from the bathroom having been forced into your mouth in order to keep you quiet.

Earlier you were crying and screaming into the material of the makeshift gag, the terror of the situation overtaking you. But when nothing further happened, you managed to calm down enough to keep quiet, and now you were waiting for what he intended to do from here. With how tightly he had bound you, there was no scenario where you got out of your constraints on your own. Which meant there were only two possibilities: a third party would find and untie you, or he would untie you himself.

The first possibility seemed incredibly unlikely.

That second possibility seemed like it would only happen if he viewed you in a positive light.

So you stayed quiet, hoping that your silence would be interpreted as submission.

Currently the man was across from where you lay on the bed, sitting forward in the chair that had been placed in front of the window. In the initial attack, all you had truly registered was how much taller and stronger he was in the way he had picked you up and threw you onto the bed without any effort. Now that things had calmed down and you were trying to be smart about the moves you made, you were able to take in the details you hadn't noticed before. Like his short, spiky purple hair and his prominent cheekbones.

The way the light from the nearby lamp hit him somehow made him feel even more intimidating than he already was, the shadows almost creating an ominous aura about him. As if you weren't scared enough of him already.

At least he wasn't touching you anymore. After he'd gagged you, his hands stayed on you while you continued to struggle. And even after your struggles had died down completely, they stayed there, occasionally to gliding up and down your body while he stared at you.

What exactly those dark eyes were seeing when he stared at you in that way that felt so intense, you couldn't begin to imagine.

It was a relatively recent development that he'd had enough of it and moved away from the bed, shifting the blinds of the window slightly to peek out before sitting down across from you, watching you with a pensive look on his face.

Being that you were now in a calmer state, you wished you could ask him why he was doing this. What he wanted and what he planned to do with you.

…. It wasn't completely true that you wanted to know the answer to the last one; you were too scared that he would tell you that he planned on ending your life. Or maybe he was planning on selling you. Both of those things happening was also a possibility.

How much time had passed since you had first entered your room was unclear – you kept your gaze on him, waiting to see if and when he would act.

When that time finally came and he did speak, it surprised you.

“This must be terrible for you.”

You blinked when you heard his voice for the first time, but continued to keep quiet, waiting for him to continue.

“I kept thinking of what I should say,” he told you, “what I could say to make this easier on you, so you could understand what's going on. And while I don't think that I'm terrible when it comes to words, I've never found myself more stumped than I am right now.”

He sighed as he added “if only you could see it, or if I didn't have to get back so quick, it wouldn't be this way. I wouldn't have needed to do this to you.”

'Do this'?

Tears began to fill your eyes again, and despite how you had told yourself to keep quiet, you tried to speak. Desperation drove you to beg for your life, something that could've been a horrible decision if he was easily angered, but his eyebrows raised slightly while he hummed.

“You want to say something?” he asked.

You nodded eagerly.

He considered you a moment before he got to his feet, returning to sit on the edge of the bed and placing one hand firmly on your shoulder.

“I'll take this out,” he began, motioning to the washcloth before adding “but make sure you don't scream. It'll only end badly for you.”

You nodded again, this time in a much more steady manner as you were desperate to show that you were calm and wanted to cooperate.

The man was satisfied with that, and he pulled the washcloth out of your mouth, freeing your tongue from the taste and texture of the heavy fabric that had grown wet from your saliva. You couldn't help but cough for a moment, relieved to get that out of your mouth. All the while he kept that hand on your shoulder while also being prepared to gag you again if you got too loud.

But you followed his instruction, and he seemed to relax some when moments passed and you didn't start screaming.

Then you spoke to him.

“Sir,” you began, “please don't kill me.”

At that, he smiled.

“Ah, that was what you were worried about, was it?”

He squeezed your shoulder reassuringly as he said “don't worry. You aren't going to die.”

“R-really?”

“Really.”

He pulled you up into a sitting position and moved your legs so they were placed over his lap. With how your wrists and ankles were still bound, it felt awkward, but you didn't dare make any move to try and free yourself. Not right now.

“It would be terrible for me if you died,” he said, “so believe me when I say that's the last thing I could ever want.”

You didn't understand how exactly that could be bad for him, but you nodded as if you did.

“Um, so,” you began, “can I ask what exactly it is that you do want?”

“For you to come with me.”

“Come with you? Wh-where?”

“An island.”

“… An island?”

He saw the way your eyebrows furrowed and patted you on the cheek as he said “I feel all of this is something that will make more sense if you see it rather than have me explain it to you. So while it might be confusing for now, I promise it will become clear in time.”

“For now,” he continued, “I need your full cooperation.”

“….. So you can take me to an island?”

“Yes.”

You wanted to ask what happened after that, but he spoke again before you were able to.

“You can't use nen, so we'll need to go the long way to get there,” he said, “we'll be leaving tomorrow.”

What the fuck is nen?

That thought flashed through your head before you focused on the second part of his sentence: leaving tomorrow?

“I-I'm supposed to head back home tomorrow,” you told him, “people will notice when I don't come back.”

“Then we'll have to get going early.”

He smiled as he said that, speaking as though this was a last-minute trip that you were a willing participant in and brushing off what you said completely. Like the fact that there were people who would notice once you were gone wasn't a concern to him. He didn't care that he was taking you away from them. He didn't care that you didn't want to go with him.

And there was nothing you could do about that. After all, the first thing this man had done was prove to you that you couldn't fight him off.

As much as you wanted to scream and yell at him to let you go or cry out for help in the hopes your neighbors would hear you and call for help on your behalf, at best all that would do was get that washcloth stuffed inside your mouth again, and that was at best. If you wanted any chance of getting away from this man, you needed to get him to trust you enough so his guard relaxed.

It was the only way.

“With that said, we should get some sleep,” he told you, patting you on the cheek again while he added “we have a long drive ahead of us, and once we start, I want to make as few stops as possible.”

He gently pushed you back onto the mattress before moving your legs off of his lap and standing back up.

You were compelled to speak again when he began to walk away.

“Can I ask one last question?”

He paused, turning to look at you as he said “of course.”

“Who….. Who are you?”

He smiled at you and answered with his name.

“Razor.”

There was little sleep to be had that night. While the bed in the hotel room was incredibly soft and comfortable, it was hard to sleep when you had a kidnapper nearly twice your size laying next to you. The feeling was made worse during the times of the night when he put a hand on you again, running up and down your side with experimental touches. He knew you were awake during those times as well, as more often than not you weren't able to keep in the scared noises that came from your mouth whenever his hand brushed near your neck or went lower than your stomach, still fearful of his intentions. He didn't reprimand you, likely because you were doing your best to be quiet. But he didn't stop either, not seeming to care at all how much this was distressing you. To top it off, your arms remained bound, forcing you to try and rest in an uncomfortable position that guaranteed you would lose sleep no matter how soft the mattress was.

Dawn had barely cracked when Razor got up, shaking you awake when it felt like you had just barely gotten to sleep. Your tiredness was definitely showing even with how hard you tried to be alert, because he chuckled at you.

“Don't worry,” he told you, “you can sleep in the car if you need to.”

However, the moment you were placed in the passenger's seat, you were wide awake again. And as Razor drove you away from your hotel and down the highway in the opposite direction of the airport, despair settled in the pit of your stomach. You were being kidnapped, and you were doing nothing to stop it because there simply wasn't anything you could do.

So you sat there silently with your hands bound again as he took you, and the only saving grace of the situation was the fact that he'd tied them in front so you were a bit more comfortable this time.

Razor stayed silent as well while he kept his focus on the road.

An entire day passed with barely anything being said. You didn't say anything unless he spoke up first, and when you did speak, it was just to let out a “yes” or an “okay” to whatever he told you to do. Like when he tossed you a protein bar and told you to eat, or when he told you to keep your hands on your lap so no one passing by might catch sight of your bound wrists.

Cooperate fully. Make him think you were too scared to go against him. Wait for him to let his guard down.

The worst moment was when he stopped the car to fill up the gas tank, and he allowed your wrists to be free once more as he let you out to use the nearby restroom. Before letting you go, he whispered a warning as he told you not to get any stupid ideas. You didn't need any clarification: there was only one person at the station that you could see, standing away from the pumps so they could smoke their cigarette in peace. With only them seeming to be present, trying to get help here was a stupid idea, and one you would only do if you had no care for the innocent bystander who would undoubtedly suffer because of it.

It was when you were leaving the bathroom and heading back to the car that you felt heavy. Razor's eyes were fixed on you when you stepped out, and the sight had you frozen for a moment.

You didn't want to go to him. Every instinct in you was telling you to run, run as fast as you can and don't look back until you find somewhere safe.

But he was expecting that.

Despite the laid back body language he displayed, a gut feeling told you that he'd be on you the instant you tried getting away from him. That same gut feeling told you that it was better not to anger him. Even if he said that he didn't want you dead, how the hell could you trust a man who had kidnapped you?

You walked back to the car, albeit slowly. If your pace was enough to annoy him, he chose not to comment on it, though the instant you were both back in the car he restrained your wrists again.

Razor drove well into the night, not stopping to rest even when you felt it was too hard to keep your eyes open. You fell asleep like that, and when you woke up early the next morning with an ache in your neck, he was still driving, and you wondered if he had slept at all that night.

After another breakfast of an energy bar and bottled water, you got up the courage to ask him a question.

“How far will we be driving?” you asked.

“Until we reach the coast.”

“Ah.”

That would take a while, then. You weren't that close to any oceans. So it would be a long time spent being around him in the small space of the car.

At least he couldn't do anything to you while he was focused on the road, right?

Turning your attention to the window, you saw that the highway you were on was now slowly filling up with traffic. It was still early morning, thus the morning traffic was merging on the road. Much to Razor's displeasure, as you heard him make an annoyed grunt when he was forced to slow down the speed of the car.

It was disheartening to know that the trip would last that much longer.

You expected that today would be a repeat of the previous: he would say very little aside from ordering you now and then, and you would keep quiet and do as he said. The less you needed to speak with this man, the better.

But then he spoke up.

“You seem tired; are you sure you don't want to sleep more?” he asked.

It took you a few moments to reply, and during that time he glanced over to you. That was what spurred you to respond.

“I don't think I can,” you answered.

“If the front seat is too uncomfortable for you, I can pull over and you can move to the back.”

“I'm okay.”

“… I see.”

You kept your eyes averted from him, not sure what all of this was about but not wanting to poke the bear to find out. Why was he pretending to look out for your well-being? God, all you wanted was to be away from him.

But now with the traffic forcing him to drive far beneath the speed limit and the already long road you had ahead of you, getting away from him wouldn't come any time soon. And now it seemed that your previous question had encouraged him to talk to you, as Razor broke the silence once again.

“You're free to talk, if you'd like.”

“…. I'm okay.”

You didn't say anything after that, and once a few moments had passed, you sensed his gaze on you again when he looked over to you.

“You're getting bored of doing nothing but sitting, aren't you? Why don't you tell me about yourself?” he asked.

The fuck did that mean?

You shook your head, and you felt his confusion grow as he continued to watch you.

“You seemed more eager to speak the other night,” he commented.

Probably because I was panicked from getting jumped in my hotel room, you thought to yourself. Now you didn't want to say anything, or even know anything about what would happen to you. The previous day you had spent in silent dread only built up your paranoia and your fear and you didn't want to hear some story from him that was undoubtedly untrue all to keep you calm for the journey.

You didn't need to know the details of what would happen, the scenarios in your mind that slowly began running wild being all that you needed to guess as to what your fate would be at the end of all this. You were definitely going to die; the fact that he didn't care about you seeing his face seemed like proof of that.

So why give him the satisfaction of feeding you false hope that things wouldn't be as bad as you thought they would be?

Although…..

You had to admit that the island story felt like a weird lie to feed you. Surely he could've come up with something better, some reason that wasn't quite so mysterious. Then again, you couldn't think of any good lie to feed to someone who was being kidnapped.

But again, why in the world would he say that?

The traffic around you was starting to get better when you voiced that thought.

“Why do I need to go to the island?” you asked.

“Because I need you,” he answered.

“For what?”

He didn't answer, and you glanced back over to find that Razor's smile had fallen as he kept his gaze on the road. It didn't seem like he intended on answering you. If that was the case, then you should leave it be. No sense in angering him unnecessarily. He was the one in control, not you.

But he eventually surprised you when he chose to speak again.

“Unfortunately,” he began, “that's one thing I can only explain once we get there.”

“Oh.”

That again.

“Is there a reason why you can't explain now?” you asked.

“Because it may be a bit too difficult to believe simply hearing it.”

“So leaving me without answers for however long you lug me around is the better option?”

Your regretted saying that as soon as the words left your lips. It had been too forceful, too angry and not in line at all with the role of captive you were meant to play. Him not doing much to you had you growing too comfortable, too bold, and Razor obviously noticed it too as he looked over to you with one of his eyebrows raised.

One look from him was all it took for every fear to return, and you went back to cowering in your seat, mumbling a soft “sorry.”

He hummed but said nothing further.

An uncomfortable silence was now in the air, interrupted only by the way Razor tapped his finger against the steering wheel.

You noticed something then: a piece of teal colored string that was wrapped around his pinky. One with some sort of design printed all over it, though it was too small and too far away from you to make out any details.

Your eyebrows furrowed. With the way he'd been touching you that first night, shouldn't you have noticed that before? Then again, how could anyone be paying attention to such fine details after what you'd been going through in that moment?

Ultimately, you took your attention off of that; whatever that was, it couldn't have mattered.

“Have you ever seen my face before today?” he asked.

It was late in the afternoon when he asked that, the third day since he had kidnapped you playing out without much talk aside from the orders he would give you whenever he stopped to refill the car's tank. Despite the talk you had the previous day, he didn't push further to make you speak to him. Maybe the last conversation felt just as strange for him as it had for you.

Evidently he was moving past that now as this new question hung in the air.

Your eyebrows furrowed, but instead of asking him why he was asking, you looked at him and tried to recall if there was any spot in your memory where you had seen his face before all of this. There was a reason he had asked, right? He wouldn't just ask such a thing randomly, right?

Maybe he'd been stalking you for a long time.

As hard as you tried, however, you came up blank in terms of any previous memories that involved your kidnapper, and after a few moments you slowly shook your head “no” in response.

For some reason, Razor actually seemed relieved at that, smiling as he said “that's good.”

“…. Why is that good?” you asked against your better judgment.

With that smile still on his face, Razor shook his head as he replied “I'd rather not go into it. I don't want your opinion of me to go any lower.”

…. What?

“Why would my opinion of you matter?” you asked.

Now Razor seemed confused, glancing over to you while asking “why wouldn't it matter?”

Why wouldn't it matter?

Was he fucking serious?

“Because I've been kidnapped?” you responded, “because I have no say in any of this? Because you were waiting in my hotel room for me, and then you tied me up on the bed? Because it's pretty amazing that I haven't died yet, and there's still a good chance that everything you've been saying to me is a lie so you can keep me calm before you gut me like a pig and dump me in a ditch somewhere.”

He wasn't smiling anymore, his expression now turned serious. You should've been worried about how it didn't seem like he was paying attention to the road.

You should also stop talking. The way you were going right now, you were liable to say something bad that would upset him.

But did it matter if you upset him if you really believed he was going to kill you?

“After you did all of that, why the fuck does my opinion of you matter?” you asked, “why do you care about how your kidnapping victim feels? If you weren't such an awful person, you wouldn't have kidnapped me in the first place. How the fuck can you sit there and be worried about if I like you or not?”

Razor pulled the car over to the side of the road.

Fuck

You averted your eyes as you started to shake.

He'll do it here. Shoot or strangle you and then dump you in the back. Take whatever it was he wanted from you and then throw you away like garbage. That would be the way your life would end, and you were powerless to stop it.

There was no chance of survival, and there was nothing you could do but prepare yourself for the inevitable.

He's gonna kill me he's gonna kill me he's gonna kill me

Razor placed his hand on top of yours.

Your heart leapt into your throat and you jerked your body away. The furthest you could go was the door, slamming your hands on the window as you ended up against it, pressing yourself against it as far as you could while tears began to fall. This was it. You shut your eyes, waiting for something bad to happen. Either metal being placed against your flesh or his hands wrapping around your neck. Maybe even a plastic bag placed over your head.

Why did he need to pick you?

Why couldn't he have left you alone?

You flinched again when you felt his hand on your shoulder. As this time there was nowhere else for you to go, his hand stayed.

Nothing more than that.

It took you a while to realize that he wasn't doing anything else. With however many minutes had passed with you hyperventilating and crying, he hadn't moved forward with any action other than the hand that he had placed on your shoulder.

After realizing that you were still alive when everything was telling you that you should be dead by now, you came to another realization: the way his hand was placed on your shoulder was almost as if he had done it as a way to comfort you.

His hand was warm where he touched you. Were it not for the horrible situation, it just might have made you feel a bit better.

By that point your cries had quieted down, and he took that as an opportunity to softly speak your name.

You glanced over at him through blurry vision.

He was frowning and his eyebrows were furrowed, but he didn't seem angry.

Razor actually looked sad.

“Are you really that scared of me?” he asked.

Tears continued to roll down your cheeks as you nodded, and that only seemed to discourage him even more.

“Even after I told you that I'm not going to hurt you?”

“How can you expect me to trust anything you say?” was your response.

Razor stared at you, his hand still on you. His lips began to part as if to speak, but then he turned his head away from you, looking out through the windshield and at the highway before him.

“Can't argue with that,” you heard him mumble.

Then he removed his hand and returned his attention to driving the car, pulling back out onto the road and continuing on.

Neither of you said anything for the rest of the drive.

It was late when Razor decided to stop for a bit, pulling off of the highway and renting a room from a small and rather seedy-looking motel. He'd left you in the car while he went to get a room, and while he still warned you not to try anything, his tone wasn't quite as harsh as it had been those times earlier. It was as though he was trying to be more gentle with you.

You didn't respond except to nod silently.

Now it felt like you were repeating the situation from that first night: the both of you on the bed with you feeling incredibly unsafe while trying and failing to get any sleep. The biggest difference this time was that the mattress of the motel was uncomfortable as shit, and you shifted every few minutes as you tried to find a spot that felt nicer.

At least you weren't sleeping in the car again, you told yourself.

He was still awake. Although you tried not to pay attention to him, it was hard to keep your eyes averted whenever you turned to face his direction. More than once the two of you made eye contact, and immediately after you would turn away. You would have stayed facing away from him if only the goddamn mattress wasn't so awful. And shouldn't he be asleep by now?

The fact that Razor was still awake and alert after three days of what appeared to be constant driving wasn't normal; who the hell could go that long without rest? How had the two of you not yet died in a car crash?

Maybe kidnappers were built different, you dryly thought to yourself.

“…. Do you want to watch anything?”

Razor's voice interrupted that thought train, and you noted that his tone was soft again when he asked, but you shook your head as you stared straight ahead at the wall next to you.

He hummed, and it sounded like he was disappointed.

But for some reason that wasn't the end of it.

“What can I do to make you trust me?”

….. He had some nerve to ask that, after everything. Was he aware of that? Probably. Despite that odd thing regarding your opinion of him, he was pretty self-aware on how wrong all of this was. You'd be justified in ignoring him, though. Razor would probably recognize and understand that, as well.

…..

Even if you were justified, what good would that do you?

After a moment, you remained where you were but pulled your arms upward, holding your bound wrists in the air for him to see.

A few seconds passed and nothing happened.

You figured that his lack of action meant “no”, and with a sigh, you began to pull them back down.

Razor grabbed them.

For a second, all you felt was panic at his sudden touch. You were reminded of that first night and how powerless you were.

It only lasted a moment, however, as Razor grabbed at the zip-tie and, with a slight tug, snapped the plastic off of you. Within a moment, your wrists were free.

… Were they supposed to break that easily?

“Is that better?” Razor asked.

“…. Yeah.”

He pulled away, his eyes remaining on you after. And now that he had done as you wanted, there was a certain level of expectation in the air, such as you would look at him and have a conversation. A proper one.

Continuing to ignore him now seemed like it would be a bad idea.

So you sat up, turning around on the bed so you were facing him. He seemed pleased by that, so that wasn't bad.

But fuck he was intimidating.

Surely after the past few days your fear of just looking at and speaking to him should have gone down somewhat, but no. Looking at him head on while he had his full attention on you had your palms beginning to sweat.

You grabbed the pillow you'd been resting on and wrapped your arms around it as you held it close. Maybe that was pathetic but it made you feel better.

“Ready to talk?” Razor asked.

“Depends on what you have to say,” you answered, “if you're going to tell me that you'll be knocking out my teeth before you feed me to pigs then I'd rather you not say anything.”

He let out an exasperated sigh.

“I told you that you're not going to die.”

The firmness was back in his tone, and you sensed that he was getting to the point of being aggravated.

You looked away as you held the pillow tighter.

“Okay,” you breathed out, “I'll believe you. But then….”

You inhaled before you spoke.

“I want to know why you're taking me. And I don't want an excuse about needing to wait until we get to wherever. I want answers now.”

“I've been pretty cooperative, so I at least deserve that much,” you added.

You glanced over and then away again, still nervous about his potential reaction. While he didn't seem to have anger issues, he more than likely had limits when he was pushed too far. If he wasn't going to kill you, he could keep you alive to experience worse.

A second quick glance revealed that he was staring at that string around his finger.

Then he made eye contact again as he asked “do you think you could listen to what I have to say with an open mind?”

“Uh, sure?”

Razor didn't seem as pleased about the uncertainty that made it's way into your voice, but after a moment's hesitation, he seemed to resolve himself as he spoke again.

“Do you believe in soulmates?”

You blinked.

“….. What do you mean?” you asked.

“That there are people in this world who are connected and are meant to be together?” he explained.

“Connected how?”

“By a force that's invisible to most,” said Razor, “like a red thread that you can only see if you have the ability to look.”

What

You blinked again, not sure of what to say.

“I… I guess I've never thought about it,” you began, “if I'm being honest, I'm really not sure.”

“I see.”

Again, there was disappointment in his tone.

Despite being worried to question him, you hesitantly asked “is…. Is there a reason why you asked?”

You had a bad idea as to why he'd mention such a thing. But you held onto hope that this tangent about soulmates was just his way of trying to make a joke so you felt better. Or maybe he was bringing up something this random just to fuck with you. Even that wouldn't be too bad.

He answered your question with a question of his own.

“What would you do if I said we were soulmates?” he asked.

“….”

…. Oh god.

This entire time you'd been convinced that Razor was going to kill you, no matter how much he said otherwise. And if not that, maybe that he would sell you off to someone. Now you were learning that all of this was happening because he was crazy. He'd seen you and was pushing some sort of fantasy onto you while justifying it with the notion of 'soulmates'. That had been all he needed to feel no guilt over tying you up and kidnapping you – because in his mind, what he was doing was right.

Of all the combinations he needed to be, why did he need to be both mentally unstable and unreasonably strong?

That was the other important thing: regardless of his sanity, he still posed an incredibly dangerous threat physically. As he continued to watch you while he waited for you to say something, you were aware that it would be a bad idea to flat-out say 'no'. Better to play along at least somewhat.

“…. I don't know,” you eventually told him.

Razor let out a soft sigh as he said “you think I'm insane, don't you?”

“N-no. Nothing like that,” you replied.

He hummed, and the way he hummed sounded as though he didn't believe you. Then he reached over and began to caress your cheek, making you cringe internally. While you wished you could get his hand off of you, you told yourself to deal with it for now.

“I wish I could show you proof – I really do,” Razor said, “but I'll get into some serious trouble if I use nen while I'm out here.”

That word…. He'd mentioned it before, though you still had no idea what it meant.

“So it needs to wait for the island?” you asked.

“Exactly.”

“…. Okay.”

Better to not make a fuss, you told yourself. Act like you're potentially open to the delusions he's spewing out. Delusional people prefer it when others agree with them, right?

Still, to find out that he had taken you because of such a reason….

The worst case scenario now was that you wouldn't get away and you'd be stuck playing out Razor's romance fantasy with him. At least you wouldn't be dead, right?

…..

It might be a good idea to get off of the soulmate subject, at least for now. And since he was mostly willing to be open and honest with you, now might not be a bad time to question something else he had said.

“Can I ask something else?”

The fact that you were changing subjects was obvious, but he seemed to accept it as he pulled his hand away as he answered “go ahead.”

“Why did you ask if I had seen you before?”

For some reason, that question was the one that had him frowning, and he tore his gaze away from you as he sighed.

“I don't know that you want to hear that answer,” he told you.

“Why?”

“It's not pleasant.”

“So?”

“… I'd rather we wait a while before we get to that discussion,” Razor said.

“I don't want to do that,” you replied.

He grimaced at your response, but oddly enough he didn't seem to be getting upset as he had been when you made that comment about him killing you. Maybe that was why you were spurred to push for him to speak.

“You said you want me to trust you, right? Why not answer?”

“Because you won't be happy with what I tell you.”

“Can it really be worse than what you've done to me so far?” you asked.

“If you can imagine the sort of crimes that get someone sent to death row, then yes.”

“…. Oh.”

Razor turned his head towards you, and you got a certain sense of “I told you so” when he looked over.

What he did couldn't have been any small crime – given how easy it had been to imagine him killing you, murder was the first thing you thought of. But even then, convicted killers didn't always get sentenced to death. There was that guy from Zaban who had literally torn his victims to pieces and while he had gotten over 900 years in prison, the fact that he hadn't been put to death was mind boggling to many.

So just what had Razor done to get himself on death row?

And why was literally everything about this only managing to become worse and worse?

“Why were you sent to death row?” you whispered after a few moments.

It wasn't much of a surprise when he took a bit to answer, frowning again as he stared off at the space in front of him. He didn't want you to know anything about this for some reason.

But eventually, he answered.

“I killed some people,” he said.

“How many?”

“You don't need to know.”

“Why did you kill them?”

“Because I could.”

“That's it?”

“That's it.”

That's horrible, you wanted to say. But you refrained. Not only because it would be pointing out the obvious, but it probably wouldn't do any good saying that to a man who admitted to something as awful as murder.

Because I could

The words echoed in your head, and you couldn't help but note how there had been a distinct lack of remorse in his tone. Almost as if he didn't care about the lives he had snuffed out for no reason.

A weight settled in your chest at that thought. Why it did remained unclear, but you found yourself wanting to make this better somehow.

“Do you feel bad about it?” you asked.

“What?”

His confusion was evident.

“Do you feel bad for killing those people?” you clarified, “if you could do it all over again, would you leave them alone?”

Why you now wanted so badly for him to agree with what you said was also unclear. Razor was a kidnapper and an admitted murderer – one who was bad enough that he earned himself a spot on death row. Why did it matter to you whether he was sorry for what he'd done?

But regardless, it seemed that was what your heart wanted.

Razor hadn't answered you, and in fact, he was looking at you as though you had grown three heads.

… That wasn't a good sign.

After a few moments where it seemed he was trying to pick his words carefully, he spoke up.

“I don't see much value in thinking about things I could've done differently in the past,” Razor answered.

Then he reached over to you.

While this time you didn't flinch or jerk away, you stiffened immediately, the pillow you held becoming squished between against you as you anticipated him putting his hands on you again.

Surprisingly, Razor paused when he saw your reaction, seeming thoughtful as he watched the way you sat, virtually petrified on the bed with a terrified look on your face.

Could he really blame you? He just told you a lot that warranted being worried about him. Even moreso than before.

Evidently he didn't, as he pulled his hand back and smiling at you again as he said “the important thing is what's happening now, and what our lives will be like from this point onward.”

“So let's not focus anymore on that,” he added.

Stop talking about it, was what he meant.

“Okay,” you whispered, nodding in agreement.

Razor seemed pleased with that.

Not long after he told you to rest up, and within a few minutes the lights were off. Once more you needed to try and get some sleep while you lay next to your kidnapper, and the only saving grace was the fact that he was keeping his hands off of you this time. But while you tried to get some meager amount of sleep, you weren't able to focus much on his semblance of respecting your personal space. Instead, there was only one thought going through your head in that moment:

He wasn't sorry

Your wrists weren't tied up when you left the motel the next morning.

That was nice.

And while Razor wouldn't let you out of the car, he did stop at a restaurant to get you a to-go order of pancakes when you asked him to. Eating them in the moving car was awkward but you appreciated that he humored your request.

That was also nice, even if it had the potential of being your last meal before Razor took you to that island.

The knowledge soured the meal somewhat, but as much as you hated to admit it, you weren't so sure now that you would be escaping him. Razor hadn't given you any opportunity to take advantage of, and even with him giving you a bit more freedom of movement, he made a point to lock you inside the car during the time he was gone.

That made sense. After everything, you couldn't see him being foolish enough to leave you alone without having taken some step to secure you beforehand. It was actually pretty surprising that he was giving you the freedom he was after what he'd told you in that motel room.

Though maybe it wasn't too surprising when you considered the fact that he wanted you to like him. While the soulmate thing was complete bullshit, that was what Razor believed. So it made sense that he would want you to feel good about him since he planned on keeping you with him from now on.

That last part had never been said, but you got the sense that would be what happened if Razor got his way.

The rest of your life being spent playing into this man's delusions….

You would have shuddered at the thought if not for your fear that Razor would notice it.

“We'll be driving through the rest of the night,” he told you some time later, “and by tomorrow morning we'll have made it to our boat. From there it won't be too long of a journey to the island.”

You nodded along, though hearing what he said caused a pit to form in your stomach.

Once you were on that boat, the chances of escape were next to zero. It would be better to throw away any thoughts of escape if you were to reach that point.

To try and get away while on the water would be suicide.

He asked you questions every now and then, and though it wasn't as strong as it had been the previous night, you felt that pressure like you needed to answer him in exchange for the kindnesses he had shown you.

So you did what he wanted, and every time you glanced to him after, you saw a pleased look on his face.

You should've felt bad for him. Razor was the one who clearly had a lot of issues – things that, if he was a bit more mentally well, he probably wouldn't have done. Maybe. But then again, you were the one being dragged along with him against your will, so your sympathy could only go so far.

The sun was setting when Razor pulled over to another gas station to refill the tank. This was probably the last stop like this that you'd be making, if what Razor said earlier was correct.

The hand drier in the bathroom was still roaring when you left, only to be muted once the door shut behind you. As you had done a lot over the past few days, you immediately headed back towards the car as you knew your kidnapper wanted you to.

Only this time he wasn't watching you like a hawk.

Razor was by the car as the tank continued to fill, leaning against it as he stared out into the distance. Your gaze followed his, and you found that he seemed to be staring at a factory that sat in the distance, if the long, rectangular building accompanied by several smokestacks were any indication. Or perhaps he was looking beyond that, at the city that which was several miles away but still visible from where you stood. Or maybe it was just the sunset. It was at the time of day where the sky was at its prettiest.

Instead of entering the car once you returned, you went to his side and stood next to him, copying the way he leaned on it. He glanced at you, but said nothing about what you were doing. He only returned his gaze to the sight in front of him.

And then an odd expression morphed onto his face.

One that was almost wistful.

“Are you okay?” you asked cautiously.

Razor seemed surprised, looking back at you as he asked “why?”

“You look a little sad, I guess.”

“Do I?”

He looked back in the direction of the factory and the city that sat far off in the distance, and that wistful expression returned. As much as you wanted to ask him what he was thinking about, that question felt like it might be too intrusive and could potentially cause a bad reaction from him, particularly if it involved his past. He really didn't want you to know much in regard to that.

He let out a sigh.

“I guess I am, a little bit,” Razor said, “this is the last time I get to be out and about in the world like this. Once we get back to the island, I know I'll never leave again.”

“Never?” you repeated.

“Never,” he said, “the purpose of leaving the island every so often was to find you, and now that I have, there's no reason for me to come out here like this.”

He leaned his head back, now looking at the darkening sky above him as he added “I knew it was coming, but I didn't think it would bother me, knowing that this is the last time I can walk around like I'm free.”

“… Are you not?”

“Not really.”

“Why?”

“Death row convict.”

“Ah. Right.”

You went over the new information in your head.

“So you can't leave the island once you go back?” you asked, “is it a prison?”

He let out a short laugh.

“It's a prison for some of us, but even then it's nicer than any traditional prison you'll find,” he said.

“Us? There are others like you?”

“Yeah,” he nodded, “but don't worry, you won't need to interact with them.”

You nodded, though your eyebrows furrowed as you thought on it a bit more.

“Will I be able to leave at all?” you asked.

“No.”

You sighed.

“Figures.”

Kicking at a bit of rubble by your foot, you said “so, the plan from here is to go to an island where we'll never leave, and then just….. Hang out there forever?”

“There's a bit more to it than that.”

“Hm.”

When Razor reached for you that time, you didn't flinch or shy away. And when his hand settled on your shoulder, you didn't give much reaction other than to look at him.

“It won't be that bad. The places you'll be able to go to are the nice ones,” he said.

“…. It's still really depressing that I can't ever leave once I get there.”

Razor smiled at you, and this time the sadness he felt was even more obvious.

“I know.”

Then he stood up straight, announcing “we should get going.”

You nodded, and you wordlessly walked around the car to get to the front passenger's seat.

When you were both in the car and after you'd buckled up, something else strange happened.

Razor reached out and pulled you towards him, your head resting on his chest while he kept you in something that resembled a hug.

“I do regret that you've gotten dragged into this,” he whispered against your hair, “I really mean that. While I can't do anything to stop it, I'll do my best to make it easier for you. I promise.”

In that moment, you had no insights as to what Razor was truly thinking or feeling, no clue that everything he'd just said was a genuine promise from him that he intended to keep. So you had no idea how his heart skipped a beat when he felt your hands reach up and hold onto his jacket. You had no idea of the relief that filled him when you moved in closer and reciprocated his hug.

“I trust you, Razor.”

As those words were whispered from your lips, you had no idea that, in that moment, Razor truly believed that he had your acceptance.

There was no one else on the docks when you got there in the morning, arriving early enough that the morning mist was still present as Razor navigated the car through various warehouses and massive walls of shipping containers. Was it unusual for such a place to be completely empty at this time of day? You weren't sure; you didn't know enough about this kind of place to be able to tell what was normal or not.

All the sight did was guarantee that no one other than Razor would witness the last moments you had on the mainland.

Eventually the car came to a stop not far from the edge. Just as he had said, there was a boat sitting in the water. It wasn't anything new as it looked quite battered, but presumably it would make the journey that Razor wanted it to.

Though it would be morbidly funny if, after all of his efforts, it were to sink in the middle of the trip.

“Let's go,” Razor told you.

He stepped out of the car, and after a few moments, you copied the action.

The smell of the ocean air hit you after you got out. You stood there, your hand gripping at the top of the door to keep yourself steady as you looked out at the water before you, and then the boat.

One last leg of the journey, and then you'd be stuck with Razor for good.

…..

No one would ever find you, probably. Your disappearance had more than likely been reported by now, but all efforts to find you would be focused on that hotel you'd been staying at and the surrounding area; who would ever think to look for you on the water? Even if someone remembered seeing your face and informed the authorities, how would they reach anything other than a dead end once they got to the shoreline? You didn't have the time to leave some sign of you behind, nor could you with Razor undoubtedly watching you as close as he had been. You couldn't do anything.

Once you stepped on that boat, you weren't getting away from him. To try and do so would be suicide, you reminded yourself.

Your grip on the door became harder and breathing became more difficult the longer you stared at the boat.

I don't want to go I don't want to go I don't want to go

And again you asked why he needed to pick you.

Razor's voice saying your name forced you away from your thoughts, and you turned your head to see that he had your luggage slung over his shoulder and a concerned look on his face as he watched you. Your internal freak out wasn't as internal as you thought it was, then.

Swallowing a few times, you eventually asked “can I just….. Can I have a minute?”

“…. Alright.”

Then, to your utter surprise, Razor turned and began walking towards the boat.

Leaving you behind.

……

Was this some kind of test? Or maybe…. Did he think that since you were now at this point, he could relax a bit in watching you? Was he that confident you weren't going anywhere?

Razor continued making his way to the boat without a single glance back at you.

Your heart began to beat hard against your chest as you realized: you could run.

If you waited until he reached the boat and then made a break for it, you might just have a decent head start. If not to escape the area completely, then to find someplace to hide. Maybe find a phone and call for help. If it was a landline phone, they should be able to figure out your location without you needing to try and figure out where you were exactly.

If he caught you, it'd be bad for you, sure. But….

As he went further and further away, you were acutely aware that this was the first chance you had gotten to make an escape. The only chance you had. Were you really going to waste it by being too afraid of him?

….. No.

For once, you were going to take control of the situation.

And you were leaving.

You kept watch as Razor stepped off the dock and onto the boat, your things still in hand as he made his way to the cabin. Your hand was still gripping the door, your knuckles becoming pale from how hard you held onto it.

When he went inside. That was when you would run.

Once he stepped through the low doorway of the cabin, you did just that.

You pushed off from the door and you ran.

All you heard was your shoes on the dock and your own heartbeat in your ears as you propelled yourself forward. That felt a bit odd; you would have expected to hear him call out in anger on seeing you running. But at you reached the end and turned a corner past a line of containers, you didn't hear anything from him. There was no indication he even noticed that you had fled.

That was even better. While he would notice soon enough, every second you got with him being unaware would help in aiding your escape. You could do this. With every step forward you took with no sign of Razor coming after you, your confidence grew.

And then, after exiting the row of containers and reaching a warehouse, you saw a godsend:

A man.

He stood at the end of the structure, standing with his hands in his pockets and his eyes on you once you rounded the corner. With black hair sticking out of a odd blue cap and the rest of his blue and white clothing looking slightly worn, he looked raised an eyebrow as he took in your disheveled state.

You, on the other hand, felt relief upon seeing him. This was someone who could help. If you could explain what was happening, he could get you away and call the police. Then all of your problems would be over.

You could go home.

So you ran towards him, calling out “sir! Please, help me!”

He said nothing, but when you stumbled as you reached him, he took his hands out of his pockets so as to steady you, keeping his hands on your arms while you grabbed at the long blue scarf that hung from his neck.

“Please,” you said again, gulping as you did your best to maintain your composure, “I've been kidnapped. We need to get out of here and call the police.”

“Kidnapped? Who would kidnap you?” the man asked.

“He-he said that he's a death row convict,” you began, “he was waiting for me in my hotel room, and he tied me up and took me with him. Now he's trying to take me to some island and he says I can't ever come back.”

When the man didn't immediately respond, you got a bit more frantic as you cried “I swear, I'm not making this up! I've really been kidnapped, and I need the police before he tries to get me again! All of this is true!”

The logical part of your brain knew that getting hysterical wouldn't help you. But you weren't able to be completely logical in that moment. Now that you were so close to escape, you couldn't control yourself. You needed him to listen to what you were saying.

Finally, the man nodded.

“I believe you,” he said.

Relief rushed through you as you smiled, and you held onto his scarf tighter, unwilling to let go of this lifeline.

You spoke to the man again, asking if he had a phone, or better yet, if he had a car, and if he knew how far away the nearest police station was. He didn't really answer, though perhaps he couldn't with the way you were rambling in that moment. But you noticed when he looked past you and down the path that you'd just come from.

Your eyes followed his gaze and just like that your words died in your throat as your grip on the man's scarf became tighter, this time from fear.

Razor was there. Staring at you.

And for the first time, you saw true anger in him. Those dark eyes glared at you across the distance as he saw you in this unknown man's arms.

He's going to kill me

You looked back to the man, ready to beg for him to help again, for him to get you out of here before Razor murdered both you.

The man spoke before you could.

“Is this them, Razor?” he asked.

…. Huh?

He knew Razor's name?

How? You hadn't told this man what your kidnapper's name was. You were certain that you hadn't.

“Yeah,” your kidnapper answered.

Razor was talking to him? Not flying into a murderous rage and killing you both? The nonchalance of his reply was also a shock.

“Huh. I'm a little surprised,” the man said as he looked back to you.

“Surprised at what?” Razor asked. He started to walk forward at a moderate pace, taking his time while he kept his eyes fixed on you.

“That they got away from you,” the man answered.

You tried pulling away from him then. But the grip he had on your arms was ironclad, and no amount of wriggling would free you.

This man was far, far stronger than he looked.

“That was an error in judgment on my part,” Razor answered, coming to a stop as he had now reached the two of you by the warehouse.

“I'm sorry to have made you step in, Ging,” Razor added.

Ging?

The man who held you laughed.

“I don't mind,” Ging answered, “saves you the hassle of catching them again, right?”

“Right…..”

Razor's voice trailed off as he stared at you again, and with him being so much closer this time, you felt your entire body shudder while your heart beat pounded in your chest again, now being caused by pure, unadulterated fear.

He was so, so mad.

Ging then smiled at your kidnapper.

“Well, aside from this little mishap, everything else work out well?” he asked.

“Yeah,” Razor answered. His attention finally went back to Ging, and you felt like you could breathe again.

“Glad to hear it.”

Ging was saying something else to him but you couldn't completely hear it. You still tried to slip your way out of Ging's fingers, but it was no use; he wasn't letting go unless he wanted to. Tears were welling up as you continued the futile effort. And somehow, the fact that he wasn't even acknowledging your attempt to get away only made it worse.

Why? Why did Ging need to be here to catch you? Why did you need to have such awful luck?

What was going to happen to you now?

You didn't want to find out, and so despite knowing that there was no hope of getting away now, you still tried.

If there was such a thing as divine intervention, you wanted it right now.

“Ah, Right. Before you go, I need to see that you haven't used your nen,” said Ging.

Instead of answering, Razor held up his hand, showing the teal bit of string that was still wrapped around his pinky.

“Just needed to check,” Ging told him, “we'd both be in trouble if that was broken.”

“I know.”

“Well, now that we've gotten that out of the way-”

Finally removing his hand from where he'd been gripping you, Ging unexpectedly turned you around and pushed you, causing you to stumble forward.

Right into Razor.

He wrapped his arms around you instantly, and his hold on you was immediate and unforgiving, gripping you to the point that it hurt. Like with Ging, you wanted to struggle. You wanted to try and do everything in your power to break free of him.

But unlike with Ging, there was an air around Razor now that felt dangerous.

No, worse than that.

It truly felt like he was ready to kill someone.

And with that aura that surrounded you to the point that you felt like it might actually smother you to death, you couldn't bring yourself to fight against him. It was all you could do to keep your feet planted firmly on the ground.

Meanwhile, Ging and Razor were continuing their conversation.

“Think your replacement will be happy to see you back?” Ging asked.

“They'll probably just be relieved that they'll be done overseeing my duties,” Razor answered, “it usually takes them a few days after before they're at one hundred percent power again.”

“Well of course. The emission system was designed with specifically you in mind. There's no way anyone can run it as smoothly as you do.”

“Yeah.”

Despite his short answer, there was a hint of pride within Razor's voice, and the heavy air around you lifted somewhat.

Ging then looked back to you, smiling as he said “and now we've got this one, it'll be even better than before.”

And just like that, the air was suffocating again. It was like Razor had briefly forgotten the way he had been upset with you only to be shortly reminded of it.

Did Ging know that would happen?

…. Did he do it on purpose?

“Well, I'll let you get going then,” Ging then said, “I'm sure there's a lot you need to talk to them about.”

“Yeah.”

“Oh, and you're free to use your hatsu now if you need to.”

Razor nodded as he said “see you, Ging.”

Ging waved in response before he turned away.

Razor did the same, one hand remaining on your arm as he began to drag you behind him.

Except your legs didn't want to work, still feeling weak and like they would bend beneath you at any moment. You stumbled along for only a few steps before he bent down to pick you up and throw you over his shoulder.

He handled you roughly as he did so, the breath in your lungs pushing out with a sharp gasp before he continued along. Again he was holding you tightly after, as if with the intent to bruise, like he wanted to leave marks on your skin beneath your clothing. You frequently felt the way his fingers twitched, like he was fighting the urge to do something violent. You were crying now, but your throat was too clogged up to make any noise.

The position you were now in allowed you to watch Ging as he walked away from the two of you. His hands were in his pockets again and he walked at a relaxed pace.

If you weren't so terrified of Razor you might have screamed at the man who gave you back to your kidnapper. Maybe wish torture and death upon him.

But you didn't dare let any noise escape you now.

Why did this need to happen to you?

That thought repeated itself through the entire walk back to the boat while you quietly cried atop Razor's shoulder. Like that very first night, he had yet to say anything. And once you reached the small flight of stairs that led down inside the boat, he moved you off his shoulder.

He pushed you down the stairs just as quickly and you tumbled down into the darkness.

Despite the short fall, it still hurt when you landed, your arms taking the brunt of it. However, you barely let out a pained groan afterwards, instead quietly sitting upright before you curled in on yourself, nursing your bruised arms. It still felt like a bad idea to say anything. Even though Razor hadn't come down, you still felt that air around you. Something bad was going to happen shortly.

The sound of an engine coming to life and reverberating through the small vessel caught your attention, as did the way the boat began to move away from the docks and out onto the water.

Perhaps that meant he wouldn't come down. If he was too busy driving the boat, then you would probably be left here until he reached his destination. That wasn't bad. If he took some time away from you, then maybe he wouldn't be as upset when he saw you again.

Deciding on that being what was most likely to happen, you settled down on the floor, anticipating a long, lonely journey.

Someone's hand grabbed at you in the darkness.

Now you screamed.

On instinct, you tried to pull your arm away. Your attempt was unsuccessful, and the hand hauled you up to your feet.

Another hand grabbed at you, this time clamping down onto your leg. No matter how hard you tried to kick them away, you couldn't escape their grip.

Someone else grabbed your legs, wrapping their arms around one of your knees so you were unable to move. At that same time, someone else grabbed your free hand, and both of your arms were stretched out away from your body, making it even harder to struggle.

You still tried, though. Even when a body came up from behind you and hooked their elbows beneath your armpits, you did everything in your power to wiggle out of those hands that held onto you.

If only that had been enough.

Within moments you were completely immobilized, your body held down by the multitude of hands that had come from the darkness. The only thing you could do was scream, and the ability to do even that was taken away when a large palm slapped over your mouth. Tears continued to stream down your face.

The lights were suddenly turned on, forcing you to close your eyes while you heard Razor descend the small flight of stairs. It took a few moments of blearily opening your eyes before they adjusted to the light, but when they did, you found Razor standing in front of you.

But you weren't able to keep your focus on him for long, not when you saw who was holding you. Several men dressed in white and blue, their blue caps covering their eyes.

….. No, not men.

Things.

They weren't human. They couldn't be. Despite their humanoid shapes, the wide smiles that were filled with the dangerously sharp teeth wasn't something any human you knew of possessed. The pure white skin was also a sign that these weren't human. Not just from the sight alone, but from how that skin felt against your own. It felt artificial, and their touch was completely cold. And while you weren't able to see any of their eyes due to the blue caps adorned with numbers, every single one of them was looking right at you, smiling at you while they held you down.

Your breathing became harsher as you began to truly panic, your sobs muffled by the hand that kept you silent. You were quickly becoming lightheaded.

Somehow, the one that was covering your mouth realized this as they pulled their hand away, and you took in a few desperate gulps of air before you focused on Razor again.

His expression was just as grim as it had been when he was outside.

“Trust is an awful thing to break,” he said.

He stepped forward, and your body tensed as you tried to back away from him. Unsurprisingly, the grip those creatures had on you remained strong.

“It can take a long time to build up even in the best of circumstances, and then it can shatter completely with a single lie,” he continued.

“Or a single act.”

Razor stood before you now, towering over you with a dark look in his eyes.

“I thought we had an understanding,” he said to you, “after what we talked about, after what you said to me yesterday, I really thought that we had gotten somewhere. That even if you didn't entirely understand it, the soulmate connection was enough to keep you from running,” he continued.

“But you were lying through your teeth about everything, weren't you?”

His expression when he said that was too scary and you looked down, focusing instead on the creature that had wrapped it's arms around your knee.

You weren't allowed to look away for long as Razor grabbed you by your face and forced you to look up at him, being forced to maintain the uncomfortable eye contact.

Unable to keep yourself calm, your breathing came in harsh as you stared back at him.

And for some reason that seemed to have an effect, as the look on his face softened ever so slightly.

Razor sighed.

“Maybe…. Maybe this hurts a bit more than I expected because we're soulmates,” he thought aloud, “maybe I thought, even without the nen, that you would understand faster because the connection should have been enough.”

“I-I'm – I'm not-” you began.

He moved his hand up so it covered your mouth, cutting you off from whatever excuse he felt would fall from your mouth. Now that you were again unable to speak, you sniffled against his hand while the tears that ran down your cheek met with his fingers.

The boat was still moving, and had seemingly picked up a bit more speed as it continued forward through the water. It was going further and further away from the land, further and further out to the open ocean. You remembered what you had told yourself before:

You weren't getting away now.

Resigning yourself to your fate, you slumped over in the grip of those monsters, your body going limp. Continuing to resist now was thoroughly meaningless.

And some part of you said that it always had been.

It was still quiet; Razor said nothing more, you only continued to quietly cry and those creatures hadn't uttered a single word the entire time. The only things that kept it from being completely silent were the hum of the engine and the sound of the waves that hit the hull of the boat.

When he pulled his hand off of your mouth, you said nothing, continuing to stare up at him as you bit your lip.

Then Razor smiled.

“Ah well. Us being soulmates doesn't mean that we won't make some mistakes now and then, right?”

Despite the pleasant expression on his face, the mood in the room was anything but. Even when he used his thumb to wipe the tears from your face, the action lacked any sort of kindness. There was still a smothering aura that surrounded both him and you, though now it had significantly lessened.

But that didn't make him feel any less dangerous.

“We have several hours before we get to Greed Island – that's plenty of time for us to become acquainted properly. And I'm sure that by the end of it, we'll have both learned some things about each other.”

The smile on Razor's face had never looked more menacing.

“After all, if there's anyone who can forgive me about what I'm about to do, it'll be my soulmate, right?”

#reader insert #yandere x reader #yandere hunter x hunter #yandere razor #razor x reader #hxh razor #yandere hxh #hxh x reader #yandere

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