#Theodore Nott Comfort

[sexualtensiongrowing21]

As the Sun Sets // The Meeting // Part Six

TW: Physical Abuse, Sexual Abuse, mentions of R*pe

*Please be aware of the trigger warnings for this chapter as it is dark and some themes may be triggering or hard for some readers.*

Part Seven

Scarlett's POV:

"It's been a week since the Halloween dance and Adrian caught me leaving my dorm the next afternoon and apologized. Explaining to me that it looked bad on him that I would be showing that much skin around other people. I hesitantly  apologized, but apologized no less and told him that I would be more modest. “Good girl” he said as he kissed my cheek and walked me to class.

Draco and I have our meeting with the Dark Lord tonight and we have been in the room of requirement every night trying to get this damn thing open. We are no closer than when the term started. Needless to say, we are bloody stressed. 

Slipping into my wand into my jumper, I stand outside Draco and Theos dorm. I knock on the large oak door twice. “Come in.” I hear Draco's voice call. When I open the door I see Draco pacing back and forth from his bed to Theos, mumbling to himself. Seeing as my lovely cousin is having a sort of panic attack I take a seat on the edge of Theos bed. 

The bathroom door to my left squeaks open. “Hey, tell me if you see my father will you? Oh, and feel free to throw him under the night bus if you get the chan--” He pauses looking at me with his seductive smile. “Bambina, I didn't hear you come in.” Theo is wearing just a towel that is low on his hips and water is dripping from his chest and disappearing under the towel. 

Say something Scarlet! I yell at myself. “I uh. Yeah. Draco said it was okay to come in.” 

“Well it's more than okay. Are you here to keep me company while our Drakey goes to see the Dark Lord. “ He says that last part with a very dramatic Italian accent while using another towel to dry his curly hair. 

This stops Dracos pacing “What? No Theo. She is coming with me. The letter from mother specifically said her presence was required. I’m only invited because hes at the Manor.” 

“What? Why do they need Scarlet?” Theos eyes start to gray while he is looking at me with concern. 

“I am not sure.” Draco says digging through the mess of blankets on his bed, looking for his wand. Once his wand is secured, he holds his hand out for me, I stand up to grab it when I am stopped with a loud thump from behind me. Theo now has a black jumper on and is struggling to put his pants on. 

“Hold on. I am coming with you.” He says once his pants are on and he's reaching for his own wand. 

“Theo. No. You cannot come.” Draco is pulling us away from the brown haired boy. “The Dark Lord requested her. Not you.” 

“You're bloody mad if you think I am just going to let her get thrown at his feet. You know what he is capable of.” His face is red and his eyes are fully gray now. Anger radiating off him in waves.

“Theo.” I reach for his hand, pulling his attention off of Draco. His eyes snap to mine and lighten slightly. “I will be fine. I promise. He probably just wants me to attend because I essentially live with Malfoys.” I give him my best convincing smile.

If I am being honest, when Cissy wrote that he requested me to be there as well I was flooded with panic. It's all I have been able to think about. But Theo cannot go. I do not want to anger The Dark Lord anymore than he will already be. 

“Please. We will tell you everything we can when we get back. I promise.” I squeeze his hand reassuringly. 

Still looking unconvinced he pulls me into a hug and kisses the top of my head. “Please be safe, Bambina. Draco, please bring her straight back here.” 

With Theo releasing him from their man hug, he puts his hand on Dracos shoulder and steps back. With one final look, Draco takes my hand in his and the uncomfortable twist and pull from the belly we are home. Malfoy Manor. 

——————————————————————————————————

Aunt Cissy is standing outside the gates of the Manor awaiting our arrival. 

“Mum. Is he here already?” Draco asks quietly while hugging his mother and giving her a chast kiss on the cheek.

“Yes. He's inside waiting for you two.” She pulls me as well and kisses my cheek. “Come on. We have to hurry. Need not anger him. Remember what I taught you both?” Closing my eyes and taking a deep breath, I locked all my doors. Stealing myself off. I turn and see Draco doing the same. 

Making our way into the manor feels like a death sentence. As soon as we walk through the doors we can hear screams. Female screams. And then that laugh that haunts my dreams. My mothers laughed. 

There, sitting at the dinner table on a large wingback chair sits the Dark Lord. 

“Ah, my Protégés have arrived. Sit. Sit.” He waves his hand out to indicate for us to sit next to him at the table. As we make our way around the table I see many familiar faces. Nott Sr. Umbridge. Snape. The Carrows. Crabbe Sr. Goyle Sr. Aunt Cissy, Lucius, and of course my mom and dad. Bellatrix and Rodolphus. 

“Little Lestrange. Your father tells me you have come a long way with your training.” His red eyes are trained on me. I can feel a pinch in between my eyes. I try to focus on his words. “Yes my lord.” 

The room is silent. “Then how come… You and the young Malfoy boy have yet to fix the cabinet?” I feel Draco stiffen next to me. 

I am starting to sweat, “Well my lord.” I swallow hard. “It has proven to be more difficult than we originally anticipated..” He is pushing through now. Breaking all the locks he sees. 

“And here I was… hoping your father wasn't lying to me. That you could in fact be useful.” out of the corner of my eye I can see Rodolphus seething. “Stand up Little Lestrange.” Taking a deep breath I stand up beside my chair. 

“Rodolphus, why don't you show us some of your… training methods.” I stiffen, eyes darting to aunt Cissy, only to realize that she can't help me. Breathe…

Then before I realize,He shouts.  “Crucio” I try to stay strong. I try to focus all of my energy on staying standing. He is still pushing through my mind and now with me being distracted images of Adrian, Pansy, Blaise and Draco flashes through my mind. Late night study sessions, stolen kisses in alcoves, dress shopping. He rips through my memories one by one. 

“Remove the disillusionment charm Bellatrix. Let her show us her true self.” 

“Please” I pleaded quietly to the floor. I see her flick her wrist “as you wish my lord”.

My eyes wander to Draco. I have never shown him my scars. I have never told him what goes on when I am not at Hogwarts or here. No one knows but my parents. 

My skin feels chilled and I know that the charm was removed as well as the jumper that I was wearing. Gasps and murmurs from around the group. Tears streaming down my face and Draco's eyes are fully gray as he stares at me.

“There she is…” The Dark Lord smiles sinisterly. “Again.” This time it's Bellatrix to cast the curse, smiling her yellow teeth at me.  

“Crucio.” I'm screaming. The pain is deafening. White hot blades working their way from inside my skin trying to get out. His attack on my mind doesn't stop. This time. Images of Theo work their way to the forefront of my mind. I try to push them back but I am so weak.

Late nights by the lake. Butterflies in my stomach when he calls me “Mi ragazza”. His smile as he kisses my hand. Falling asleep on him in the common room. The way my heart wrenches when he comes back from visiting his father, covered in bruises and with broken bones. 

I can't fight back. I finally break, falling to the floor. 

“Nott....” the Dark Lord stops his attack and turns towards the elder Nott. “Ah yes. Your heir… Why hasn't he been marked?” 

Nott Sr. Looks confused, eyes narrowed as he looks from me to the Dark Lord. “He doesn't have what it takes my Lord… He is a disgrace and a disappointment to our family name.” Disgust riddles the elders' words. 

The Dark Lord contemplates this for a second “Our Little Lestrange here, begs to differ. It seems she cares a great deal for your son…” I am struggling to breathe when I am lifted by my arm, to stand by my father. “Nott… Come forward.” My vision is starting to blur but I can see Nott Sr. coming to stand in front of me. 

“What do you think your son thinks of our little Lestrange? Do you think that her feelings are… reciprocated…?” The elder Nott assesses me closely. “I am not certain, my lord.” he says solemnly. 

“I see… What do you think, little Lestrange?” I can barely think, let alone will myself to speak. 

“SPEAK” The Dark Lord yells, with a flick of his wand I'm screaming, pain coursing through my body. “N-no… M-my L-lord.” I can feel the blood starting to trickle from the laceration he created just now on my collar bone. Blood slithering down my arm and my chest.

Deep in thought the Dark Lord “ Well… What about you Nott. Are you interested in our Little Lestrange?” Stepping up to me I can feel Nott Sr. coming closer. Running his fingers down my scar over my eye. 

The other men in the room are watching intently “Well… I guess without all the scars she was quite attractive. Perky breasts. Round behind.” His hand trails from my face down to my collar bone. I try to squirm away but I am unable to while being held in place by Rodolphus. Hands ghosting over my right breast, I involuntarily take a deep haggard breath. 

“She seems eager for an affectionate touch from a Nott… How about the rest of you?... Greyback? Dolohov?...” The Dark Lord suggests to the rest of the men around the room. “I hear they can be quite… intense…” The Dark Lord whispers to me. 

Both men rise from their seats to come near me, just as eager as Nott. Sr. Tears are flowing freely now. I can still sense them standing in front of me. Eyes trained on me, licking their lips. 

My breathing picks up, my limbs locked in place. Whimpers of pain and fear escaping my mouth. 

“Now, Now… Settle down Little Lestrange. They won't touch you… Not yet…”  

“Sit back down.” He dismisses the men to be seated again and my vision has cleared a bit he speaks to me again.

“You will fix that cabinet. You will get us into Hogwarts. If not…” He goes quiet and looks around at the men who had all been standing around me 

“Then you get a taste of what life is like for your precious Nott Jr. at home.” His snake-like smile reaches Draco and with a wave of his hand he calls my cousin to attention. “Malfoy… Get our Little Lestrange back to school. You have a cabinet to fix.” 

Draco doesn't need to be told twice. With quick movements he carefully takes me from Rodolphus’ hold and walks me out of the dinner room. 

Once we are out of earshot of the others Draco tries to talk to me, I think he is trying to calm me down, but I can't concentrate on what he's saying. He picks me up bridal style and my head lays limply on his chest. 

His heart is beating rapidly. Whispering to me. Words unclear. The blood is draining from the new laceration fast. I feel the pull of apparition but as soon as we land back in the dorm I feel as if I'm drying. 

[phas3d]

Comforting You | Slytherin Boys

masterlist!

type :: angst, comfort

tw/cw :: death (draco), eating + passing out (mattheo), depression + eating (theodore), bullying + panic attack (lorenzo)

members :: draco, mattheo, theodore, lorenzo

Draco (acts of service / gift giving)

Teasing you was Draco's full time job, no matter the time, day, or place. You knew this very well and got used to it over time

But during flying class, you lost your special necklace. Many people didn't understand your frantic state and ignored you as you flew to the ground to search for it

It was the necklace your best friend gave you in elementary school. It was the only remaining item you had of them after they died.

As you searched the ground, Draco made fun of you and called you dramatic, materialistic, and more insults. But your already overwhelmed mind from losing your necklace and the degrading comments led you to cry as you continued to search.

"You flew around the entire area and river, only to notice NOW that your necklace is missing? You idiot, it's probably in the river or some animal stole it." Draco said as he scoffed at you as you continued to crawl on the floor and search every crevice for the necklace.

There is no voice of reason in Draco's head, so he instinctively kicked you, making you fall onto your side. He was about to laugh and call you pathetic, but he saw the tears stream down your face. Everything was too overwhelming as you reminisced about your past best friend and the negative comments Draco kept stating.

He panicked at the sight of your tears, instantly shutting his mouth. He pulled you up so that you would stand, making strong eye contact with you which you avoided like the plague.

"(Y/N)? What's wrong??? I'll buy you a new necklace!" He says in a desperate attempt to comfort you. "It's okay! You'll get a new one-"

"I don't want a new one!" You said firmly, as you got out of his grip and searched once again. Draco wasn't dumb, he knew the necklace must have had some significance to you.

He sighed, hating how you made him do thing he never thought he'd do. With a wave of his wand and a few words, every piece of metal within the area came flying towards him.

You stood up, searching through the floating pieces of random metal until you found your necklace and smiled widely. The second you saw it, you instantly put it back on as Draco put all of the random metals back to their original spot.

He walked up to you and pinched his robe, grabbing a clean spot as he gently wiped your tears. Your smile instantly made him smile, but he was glad you couldn't see it since you were still staring at your necklace.

Mattheo (words of affirmation + praise)

You stayed up all night for almost a week straight just to study for the finals coming up

It was genuinely one of the worse weeks of your life. You skipped hanging out with friends, kept forgetting to eat, and even passed out while studying multiple times

It got to the point that even teachers reached out to you to remind you to take care of yourself first, but you didn’t listen

The exam came and you thought you did well, until you saw the C- on your exams over and over and over again

You didn’t want to be a brat, technically you passed, but you wasted a whole week just to barely pass. You felt so stupid and felt like all your efforts was wasted

All you did for a whole day was cry in your bed, skipping all of your classes. You thought no one would notice, but of course Mattheo did

“(Y/N)?!” Matt shouted through the door, “Why are you skipping class? What happened to the A+ student?”

Although he said it jokingly, that hurt you deeply. He’s right, what did happen to the straight A+ student you were? Before you could think deeper, Matt slams the door open to see you crying in your bed. He sees you try to hide under your blankets but he could hear the sobs you were trying to muffle.

“Oh shit, my bad” Matt mumbles as he gets closer to you. He plops himself onto your bed. “What happened? Did someone hurt you?”

You shake your head and avoid eye contact. If you told him you were crying over a C, he would definitely call you a nerd. But, he could already tell due to the open texts books that scattered your floors and hidden but bright red mark.

He held up the test that you despised and gave a puzzled look at the test. "God, I don't know how you do it. This is amazing!" He says with a small smile.

"You took all advance classes this year and passed every single one! That's fucking awesome!" He says as you frown, "Well, I know YOU don't think it's awesome, but I do."

He could tell his words weren't getting to you, "Listen," he says as he grabs your face to look at him in the eyes.

"These stupid test grades?" He says holding up some papers, "They won't matter in 5 years, fuck it even 3 years! This tiny stupid letter that Snape wrote with a shit pen won't matter. You're SO smart! Think about it! There's like 1,000 kids here and I bet 50%, no 75%, wouldn't know anything on this paper!"

You turned your head smiled weakly at his comforting words, but you still felt guilty for working so hard and getting such a low score. But from the two seconds you looked away, Matt was already burning the papers with his wand, filling the room with a scent of smoke.

He smiled at you while you were in shock. "It's just a letter! Don't let the lamest letter in the alphabet ruin your weak." He says as he set the rest of your tests aflame.

Theodore (acts of services omg)

You were having a really rough few weeks, almost a month

Although Hogwarts was amazing and you made friends that are 10 times better than your family, you couldn’t help but reflect on your past

Everything you’ve regretted, every single mean comment you’ve been told, every mistake you’ve made, all of it was rushing back in your head for an unknown reason

Normally, when this happens you journal, go on a walk, or vent to someone but for some reason your brain just didn’t want to do any of those beside mellow in your awful thoughts

You skipped 80% of your classes for this week, so far no one has noticed or checked up on you which made you feel worse. Everyone except Theo

There was a light knock at your door while you stare at your ceiling. You knew that you should probably get the door, but you felt so numb throughout your whole body that you couldn’t get up, as if you were paralyzed.

“(Y/N)? I’m coming in okay?” You hear Theo’s voice and instantly recognize it. He waits about 5 seconds, to make sure you approve of this and give you time to fix anything you need. But your body was limp, as if it wasn’t in your control.

Your vision was so messed up that when Theo hovered above you, you didn’t notice him at first. Without looking at yourself, you could tell you popped a vein in your eye.

Theo was a quiet guy, he liked his actions to speak louder than his words. You heard the ruffle of a chip bag, a glass of liquid, and a bowl be set down on your bedside table. You wish you could look at the flavors of the chips, what drink he got you, and what’s in the bowl, but even moving your head felt tiring.

From your dissociated stare and limp body, he knew he needed to help you in some way. He gently slid his hands under your back and propped you up on the bed to be sitting. He opened the chip bag and scooped up some soup from the bowl.

“Ahh,” he said while opening his mouth. Automatically, you copied him and he fed you slowly, scoop by scoop.

The rest of the day was spent with Theo caring for you in some way possible to help make your situation better. He fed you dinner and medicine, picked out shows to watch, and even used magic to help you change out of your old clothes.

Although he didn’t speak much to you beside small actions and quiet reassurances, such as “it’s okay” or “take your time”, you still so comforted and loved. He knew what you needed exactly, which was slightly scary but it worked for your benefit.

He didn’t expect you to feel better instantly, and if he had to do this for multiple days or weeks, he wouldn’t mind at all. He was patient and gentle, despite his scary demeanor. But of course, he doesn’t want people to know this in order to keep up the stoic bad-boy look he had. Only you get to know.

Lorenzo (im delusional so i he gets all of them)

You always felt anxious when it came to school due to your past history of getting bullied. But you overcame it slowly, until you saw your old bully being introduced to the whole class.

Instantly, you could feel the blood leave your brain as your legs began to shake on their own. Your bully was just here for a day in order to advertise something that their school was doing, but you didn't listen.

Luckily, you got the teacher's attention and they saw the tears in your eyes, instantly dismissing you to the bathroom.

While in the bathroom, you broke down and could feel every negative memory you've had rush back to your head. Your vision blurred and you could feel your lungs breathe at a rapid rate.

You were glad to be alone during this, so that no one would question you about it. But Lorenzo saw and instantly asked the teacher to go check up on you.

You left the bathroom after the bell rung, meaning you wouldn't have to see your bully once again. You finally felt ready to face the world once again after a pretty heavy breakdown. But, you instantly felt tears rise up once you made eye contact with Lorenzo. He was waiting patiently outside of the bathroom for however long he’s been there.

“Are you okay?” he asked softly, causing the tears to instantly come back.

Although you always did your best to act tough, Lorenzo was the one thing that made you break. Everything about him was so comforting; his scent, voice, touch, all of it.

Once he sees your eyes water and the tears roll down your cheek, he instantly hugs you, gently rubbing his hand on your back to comfort. You could feel your tears get sucked into his robe, but he didn’t care at all. He didn’t move until you were ready to, he’s always been your number one comfort.

The second you move and feel your tears stop, he pats your back and stays silent for a moment to think of what to say. Despite being sarcastic and witty, he knew exactly what to say during hard times which was surprising to you.

“You don’t have to talk if you don’t want to. I don't know what happened but I'm going to assume you don't like that person, and if you don't like them then I don't like them either! Fuck them!" He said, instantly showing how much support you had.

"But, if you ever want to rant or vent, I’m always here.” He says with a soft smile, “I'll do whatever you need to feel comfortable. Walk you to class, cuss them out, fuck it I'll even hide in the girls bathroom with you!”

You smile lightly at his offers but shake your head. Seeing your smile makes him happy instantly as well. He stays with you in the halls to skip class, you’re 100 times more important than any class he’s ever been in.

The next day, your bully was gone and was back in their school. Even though you were completely over the situation , he still wanted to make you happy in some way. He believes that for every sad moment you've had, you just need at least two happy moments to overtake that sad moment. So, the next day he brought you some cookies along with a small deer keychain that he got at the store.

This man will do everything in his power to make you twice as happy, no matter what it takes.

[tomriddleslove]

The Black Lake, a shared blunt, and realisations.

✩Mattheo Riddle x Reader

Summary: The one where Mattheo has had enough. Everyone and everything seems to be agitating him, and he feels as though he can’t catch a break. Then you come along. Alternatively: You may just be his saving grace, hidden in plain sight.

Slight? Angst but mainly fluff

A/N: I get all my fic ideas when listening to music so bear with me when I say there’s a very certain vibe to this and you have to know the song to understand it.

Songs: Tek it - Cafuné

The clock strikes noon, and Mattheo couldn’t be more than relieved to finally leave the stuffy clasroom. Tossing his bag over his shoulder, he swiftly makes his way out of the classroom, ignoring the agitated glares of the other students he had so rudely shoved past.

Now Mattheo wishes he could say he wasn’t this rude that often. He didn’t really go out of his way to fight people per se, but it just so happened to be that he was quite confrontational and rather good at resolving things with his fists. However these past few days he had been more on edge than usual, snapping at almost everyone for reasons that were far beyond him.

Everything seemed to agitate him immensely, from the way lessons seemed to drag on, to his deskmates who all seemed to have a penchant for being the most agitating, infuriating people possible.

I mean, seriously? What could compel a person to chomp down on a beef sandwich in the middle of class at 10 in the morning? The professor may not have noticed but Mattheo most certainly did, having to spend the last hour with a raging headache trying to ignore the obnoxious chewing sounds and the revolting smell of beef.

He all but almost cries as he collapses down onto the sofa in the common room, grateful for the fact that everyone else seemed to have lessons currently. He closes his eyes for a millisecond, letting out a small sigh of frustration.

He feels the sofa dip beside him and that same frustration returns. He opens his eyes, ready to snap at whatever poor person had decided to sit next to him, but his gaze immediately softens when he realises it was you.

“Oh,” He murmurs, and a lazy grin tugs at your lips as you look over at him, raising a brow.

It’s remarkable just how quickly his mood seems to lighten when he sees you.

“Oh?” You repeat, amused.

“Mhmm. Just not in the mood for it recently and thought you were Belby or some other git. I was ready to hex you.” He murmurs, and you roll your eyes in mock admonishment as you reach for your book, leaning back into the sofa as you thumb through the pages.

“Charming, Riddle. Really, I feel flattered.” You say sarcastically, and the corners of Mattheo's mouth quirk upwards.

You and Mattheo were part of the same extended friend group. You weren’t the closest with him, yet you weren’t absolute strangers. You didn’t talk that much to one another, but got along surprisingly well. Mattheo was one of the only people (bar Blaise) who could match your wit and dry humour, and you were one of the few (if not only) people who didn't seem to annoy him.

You pay him no mind as you read your book, and with any other person, Mattheo would have been largely grateful for that. But for some bizarre reason, he wants you to speak to him.

He glances over at you for a second, admiring the way the gentle glow from the fireplace illuminates your face as you read.

How oblivious could one get?

You break the silence, peering down at your book as you speak.

“Do you have a double free period?”

Mattheo hums, looking over at you. He wants you to look up at him so badly, and he can’t tell why. It seemed as though he’d need a slap in the face to make him realise why he craved so much attention from you.

He shifts on the sofa, trying to appear nonchalant as he replies, "Yeah, luckily. No classes for the rest of the day. What about you?"

You glance up from your book, meeting his gaze with a faint smile. "Same here. Wanna come walk around with me?” You ask, and Mattheo nods, albeit a bit confused as to why you’d want to wander around in such cold weather aimlessly.

You reach into your robe pocket, producing a neatly rolled joint with a cheeky wag of your eyebrows. A grin spreads across Mattheo's face as he looks at you, and he raises a brow in mock disappointment.

“Am I seeing correctly, or has the academic prodigy of Hogwarts just suggested we use our valuable study time to get high?”Mattheo taunts, and you scoff, getting up.

“Piss off, Riddle. Are you coming or not?” You retort, glancing back at him.

He looks up at you, and his gaze lingers far too long on the way your eyes light up, your mouth forming a gentle curve as you smile at him and-

Oh god, Mattheo never really stood a chance, did he?

He nods, getting up as he grabs his robe and follows you. You both meander aimlessly through the empty corridors of Hogwarts, poking fun at the unfortunate students who still had lessons. As you walk past a classroom you catch a glimpse of Theodore, chin resting atop his palm as he sleepily gazes at the board. You snicker, nudging Mattheo as you both hide at the side of the doorway, peering into the class. Mattheo wraps an arm around your waist, moving you behind him and you ignore the way you reel at his touch, dazed for a second.

It doesn’t last long, however, for you're drawn out of your short-lived crisis when you spot Mattheo pulling his wand out from his pocket, discreetly pointing it in Theodore’s direction. It was rather astounding seeing how no other students in the class noticed you, but Professor Binn had a rather uncanny knack for getting people to fall into a zombie-like state of fatigue whenever they were in his class. You were convinced it had to be some sort of superpower.

With a short flick of his wand, Theodore's eyes widened as he yelped, hand shooting up to clasp over his upper arm.

As Theodore's yelp echoes through the classroom, everyone snaps out of their daze, their attention immediately drawn to the source of the disturbance. Theodore grimaces, sheepishly looking down as he tries to play it off. Unable to contain your laughter anymore, you snort, and the sound has everyone turning to look outside the classroom.

Mattheo grabs your hand, pulling you along as the two of you run down the corridor, laughter bubbling up from deep within you.

As you round a corner, out of sight from the classroom, you finally come to a stop, breathless from both the running and the laughter. Mattheo leans against the wall, trying to catch his breath as he looks at you with sparkling eyes.

It was amazing how he had gone from being so irate to so…. Carefree. He felt alive with you, like he could forget about the countless burdens that weighed down on him day in and day out.

“That was bloody brilliant,” You wheeze, clutching your ribs as you laugh. Mattheo grins, panting as he nods.

“Theodore’s hilarious. Can’t wait to hear him complain about that later on,” He muses and you snort, straightening up. You jerk your head to the side, motioning for him to join you as you slip out of the castle onto the school grounds. You leisurely walk down the fields, heading towards the Black Lake.

You stop at a large cluster of rocks near the surface of the water, plopping down on the slightly damp grass. Mattheo joins you, long legs stretched out in front of him as you fish around your pocket. His arm presses against yours and you’re immediately warmed by the heat coming off his body, trying to ignore the intoxicating aroma of his cologne filling your senses.

You hit Mattheo's thigh with your hand, nudging him to get the lighter as you place the blunt between your lips. He obliges, cupping his hand around the flame as you lean down to light the tip, taking a few drags. You pass it over to Mattheo, tilting your head back as you exhale with a sigh. Mattheo mimics your actions, letting out a low groan as he passes the blunt back to you.

“Shit, this is fucking good.” He murmurs, eyes flickering over to you as you take another drag.

You speak, blunt dangling between those perfect lips of yours that Mattheo can’t seem to tear his eyes off of.

“Should be,” You muse, handing it over to Matteho as he takes another long drag. “I sucked dick for it.” You comment offhandedly and Mattheo splutters, coughing as he smacks his fist against his chest, looking over at you in disbelief. You look at him with a lazy grin, a hint of amusement in your eyes.

“Relax, of course I didn’t. But with the price it came at I may as well have.” You murmur, shaking your head.

“So ladylike” He teases and you roll your eyes for what must be the umpteenth time, slapping his thigh as you snatch the blunt back.

You remain silent for a while, and it's oddly comforting. Just you and Mattheo, passing the blunt back and forth between one another as you overlook the black lake. The setting sun is reflected in the ripple of the water, golden rays dancing along the small waves that give the illusion of the lake being made of pure gold.

Mattheo leans back on his elbows, exhaling a cloud of smoke into the crisp air. You're reclined beside him, the gentle lapping of the water providing a soothing backdrop to your conversation.

"So, Riddle, what's been bothering you lately?" you ask casually, breaking the comfortable silence that had settled between you.

Mattheo hesitates for a moment, his gaze fixed on the horizon as he considers his response. He's never been one to open up easily, but there's something about the softness in your voice that makes him want to confide in you.

"Just...everything, I guess," he admits finally, his tone uncharacteristically vulnerable. "I feel like I'm constantly on edge, and I'm not sure why.”

Your gaze remains on the lake, a pensive expression on your face as you hum.

“I get it. I suppose for all their goodwill it's a bit hard for the boys to understand that.” You murmur and Mattheo chuckles, looking down at the long strands of grass he was fiddling with.

“Tell me about it”

You remain silent for a second longer, before turning to face Mattheo. He looks up at you and feels as though he's pinned down under your gaze. It’s as though you were dissecting his very being, staring at him with a calculating look before you speak once again, your voice low and soft.

“You don’t always have to be a hardhead. You don’t need to dismiss how you’re feeling. We aren’t meant to have this figured out yet. We’re still young, with so much to learn. What’s the point of life if we know it all now?”

Mattheo listens to your words, feeling as though you've peered straight into his soul and laid bare all his insecurities. There's a wisdom in your words that resonates deeply with him. It's as though you possess a wisdom beyond your years, a rare insight that he finds both intimidating and captivating.

"Thank you," he murmurs, his voice barely above a whisper.

That god-forsaken smile appears on your face again, and you look over at Mattheo.

“Don’t. Someone has to tell you this, right? I love Nott to bits but I doubt he has anything but quidditch on his mind.” You joke, and Mattheo laughs.

You seamlessly lighten the mood, and Mattheo is eternally grateful for that. Really, he’s grateful for you. He can't think of the last time he's laughed so much. Or felt so free. Perhaps it was the weed, that had lowered his inhibitions and relieved him of his stresses.

But no, it was a drug far worse than that. He had just gotten a taste of it and he knew he would be hooked on it. It came in the form of you, and gods was it dangerous.

There's a heavy silence between the two of you, broken by the sound of rustling as Mattheo sits up abruptly, a grin spreading across his face.

"Hey, wanna go closer to the edge of the lake? I think I saw something cool over there," he suggests, his tone playful as he nudges you with his elbow.

"What, are you trying to pull some sort of prank on me, Riddle?" You ask, your tone sceptical as you raise an eyebrow.

Mattheo feigns innocence, holding up his hands in mock surrender. "Who, me? Never," he replies with a smirk, his eyes dancing with mischief.

Despite your reservations, you can't help but be intrigued by Mattheo's suggestion, and with a shrug, you agree to accompany him to the water's edge.

You walk a few steps to the surface of the black lake, peering down at your own reflection for a second. You turn to Mattheo, caught off guard when he gives you a playful shove.

You yelp, reaching out instinctively to grab onto Mattheo as you lose your balance. Instead of regaining your footing, you find yourself slipping on the dampened grass near the edge of the lake and falling backwards into the water with Mattheo.

The icy cold water seems to seep into your body, eradicating any hint of warmth. You resurface with a gasp, brushing your wet hair away from your face as you tread water, your robe floating around you in the water.

Mattheo resurfaces moments after you, his curly brown hair now plastered against his forehead, droplets of water glistening in the fading light. He blinks the water from his eyes and looks at you with a playful grin.

“Why did you do that!” He gasps, though his tone is lighthearted and playful.

You roll your eyes, splashing him in retaliation. “You practically threw me in there! I just needed to find my footing!” You retort, indignified.

Mattheo chuckles, the sound echoing across the stillness of the lake. “Fair point.” He concedes.

Not a second later, however, he splashes you with water, somehow drenching you even further.

“Mattheo!” You gasp, sending a wave of water back at him. The two of you playfully fight in the water, and you laugh, head tilted back. It's a scene straight out of a childhood fantasy, the cares and worries of the world melting away beneath the warm glow of the setting sun.

Mattheo pauses, and his heart pounds against his sternum as he hears your laugh. It’s loud and it's unabashed, and it's the most perfect thing ever. You smile, and he feels as though he can't breathe, you had to have stolen his breath.

The golden rays of the sun illuminate your skin, catching in the droplets of water that cling to the wet tendrils of your hair. You looked like an image out of a Renaissance painting, and Mattheo is sure the sun must hide itself in shame, for on its brightest day it couldn’t compete with your radiance.

He takes in the way the fading sunlight casts a warm glow on your features, highlighting the curve of your cheekbones and the sparkle in your eyes. He’s sure the image must be etched into his mind, permanently engraved. He knows when he closes his eyes, all he will see is the image of you, and he doesn’t mind it one bit.

In fact, he welcomes it.

In your presence, he feels alive in a way he never has before. He will wake up tomorrow and face all the trials and tribulations the universe has to throw at him. For now, however, the sun is shining. The water is cold, but you make him feel warmer. The gentle sound of water sloshing about fills the silence, the horizon is beautiful.

Everything was alright.

@mildlyuninformative @chgrch @gillyweeds @anti-hero03 @schaebickel @lillywildly @multifandom-worlds

[cassiopeiasdaughter]

mirrorball

Theodore Nott x fem!reader

warnings: language, mentions of stress and an existential crisis? not proofread

summary: you are stressed and tired from being the one that takes care of everyone, and a concerned Slytherin boy wants to help

this was requested by @lalalenka and Paula 💛 for my celebration Theodore masterlist

When did life get so heavy? When did play dates turn into study sessions? When did begging your mom to check for monsters under your bed, turn into you crying into your pillow over your worries and fears? When did reality start feeling so real?

You think about that often, especially at nights, when your friends are asleep and you can remove the mask you wear, the face of happiness and optimism. You don’t have to play the part of the person who has everything under control when you are alone, you can be yourself, lost and afraid.

You are currently sitting in the Great Hall, waiting for your friends to come down for breakfast, start yet another busy day together. You woke up earlier today, exam season is coming up and sleep is something you struggle with, during those times. You know, your friends always wake up too late, that’s why you’ve grabbed their favorite pastries from the breakfast table, so you can hand them later on your way to class. It’s peaceful like this, sipping your coffee alone, planning your day as you eat; quietly going over everything you need to do-

“Are you alright?”, you hear a voice interrupting you from your thoughts

It’s Theodore Nott, you realize as you raise your head. Theodore, Theo is not a friend of yours. He is a boy from your year, a Slytherin, that you occasionally talk to during class. 

You see him at the library almost everynight, you two are always the last ones to leave. Your study dates, as you like to call them, began during 5th year; when you were hunched over a tome of Arithmancy begging yourself to understand, what the passage in front of you was saying, but failing miserably. That’s when you felt his hand on your shoulder, asking, if you accidentally cast a spell on yourself.

“I can’t understand anything.”, you remember whining and he spent the night tutoring you. You offered him help in DADA, in return and you ended up studying together for your OWLs. You like to think that you passed with good grades thanks to him, but he doesn’t agree.

Theo, is someone you feel calm and safe enough around to not fake your feelings or thoughts, most of the times, at least. Again, he isn’t your friend, but he isn’t a stranger or a mere acquaintance either. What he is exactly, that you can’t answer.

“I’m fine, why?”, you reply looking at him confused

“You’ve run out of bread for your butter.”, he says taking a seat across from you.

You stare down and see that you’ve been spreading butter on a slice of bread for so long that you’ve made a hole in the middle, with crumbs all over your plate.

Before, you can say or do anything he places a large piece of toast in front of you, with butter and blueberry jam, just how you like it.

“See you later.”, he calls out as he leaves, not giving you the time to thank him.

You spend breakfast with a smile on your face, your day suddenly feeling warmer and brighter.

“Goodmorning!”, you hear your best friend singing, while she wraps her arms around you and takes a seat.

“Morning to you too.”, you say laughing and hand her her favorite chocolate cake the one that always runs out first.

“What would I do without you?”, she says cheeks stuffed and crumbs falling everywhere- a sight that makes you laugh and always reminds you how much you love her.

“Probably still wandering around the forbidden forest.”, you say laughing, and cutting a corner from her cake

“That was ages ago, please let it go.”

“Never, now come on, we’ll be late.”, you giggle at her protests and drag her to class.

Theo isn’t brave or daring, if he were, his friends wouldn’t be giving him such a hard time about his crush and his approach, the lack of action mainly.

“You keep going like that, you won’t be in the friend zone, you’ll be in the study buddy zone, which is far force.”, Blaise warned him. But what was he to do about that? You had different friend groups and your schedules didn’t match. Was he supposed to just ask you to Hogsmeade out of the blue? 

“Yeah so this is the proper movement for the spell, now what are you doing Saturday?”, no way would he ever say that.

“Yeah, you’ll be associated with Ancient Runes Theo, no one finds that hot.”, Pansy commented- to which he responded with an eye roll.

“Maybe, I don’t want to do something about it.”, he said to his friends 

“Keep pining then.”, Draco replied 

“Maybe I will.”, and with that he stood up and left, wanting to take a walk and clear his thoughts, ignore his friends and their unfortunately correct but not practical opinions. It was fine, he would get over it and he would be fine. 

He would not be fine, he told himself as soon as he saw you, second time for today; laughing with your friends- pestering them to drink water- running around with bottles in your hands. 

His eyes light up by the way you giggle as you talk to them, maybe you are telling a story- he can’t understand, but your gestures and facial features- the way you look; alive and loud and beautiful, they send shocks down his spine. 

He knows it’s cheesy and stupid, but to him you are the sun. You are warm to others, always making your friends laugh- you take care of them, sometimes to the point of neglecting yourself. But, you are loving and kind and you light up any place you step into. It’s a shame, really, because he is nothing like the sun- he is dark and reserved, but still, your light doesn’t blind him, it could never.

“Hi Theo.”, you wave as he passes by, in a much better mood than you were this morning and he waves back with a smile, taking longer strides to leave your eyesight and maybe hide in a broomcloset?

It was getting really late and you were still in the library studying. You had so much homework and revising to do, and at some point you needed to tutor third years and prepare for dueling battles. Everything was too much, and you had no one to help you. You didn’t know how to ask your friends for help, you’d spent the past six years being the responsible one- the mom friend, you had everything under control and cared for others. The roles couldn’t be reversed now. But, it made you feel so alone, the alienation adding another weight on your chest.

“Hey.”, you hear Theo’s voice, in a soft whisper and raise your head to look at him, his books are closed and stacked in front of him, signaling he is getting ready to leave.

You spent all afternoon studying together, and it had started fine- you felt productive for the first hour, but after a while, words had stopped making sense.

“It’s really late, do you want to leave the rest for tomorrow?”

“I have one chapter left, you don’t have to wait for me, g-goodnight.”, you dismiss him with a smile

But he doesn’t leave and you look at him with eyebrows raised high. 

“One chapter.”, he whispers innocently lightly holding his hands in front of him, before he opens up a book, pretending to study.

You scoff at that and lower your head once more, to the passage in front of you. Letters are dancing in the page taunting you- catch us, they say, try to make sense of this. You are tired and Theo looking at you, concerned, isn’t helping your brain focus. You wait five, maybe seven minutes before you let out a quiet groan and say, “Fine, lets go.”, meeting Theo and the stupid satisfied look on his face.

The way back to your dorm is quiet, you are both tired from schoolwork and the lack of sleep is another crack on the mask you wear near others. You bite down at your lip nervously, as you think all of the work you didn’t get done, and all the extra homework you’ll have to finish tomorrow. You think of your friends and the parties they are begging you to go to and the Hogsmeade outings you’ve missed due to being exhausted. You think of their grades and how easy it is for them to succeed, while you spend hours in the library and still fail. You think about the future and how you don’t know what you want it to look like, and you think about life and how small you seem compared to the world.

You don’t feel the tears that slide down your cheeks, or the water in your eyes- blocking your sight. You understand you’re crying, only when a sob escapes your mouth, one that has been begging to come out for the longest time. After that, it is inevitable for you to break down, not caring about Theo and what he’ll think of you, or about the prefects who’ll come running thinking there’s been an accident in the hallways. But he calls your name, and that ruins you even more.

“‘M sorry.”, you whine- crying and turn your body away from him, lowering yourself on the ground wishing you could disappear.

“What is it? Is it that stupid Potions chapter? I’ll help you with that, don’t cry over that.”, he says panicking, kneeling behind you.

“No, no, it’s not- it’s everything. It’s all too much.”

“What is?”, he asks calmly, placing a hand on your shoulder hesitantly- you don’t tense at his touch, your body relaxes and you turn around- your face wet and red staring at him.

“Everything; school, life, everything.”, you whimper, “I have so much to do, but I can’t- I can’t. And everyone expects me to have everything under control, but I don’t, and I can’t do it anymore.”, you exclaim placing your head in the palm of your hand.

“No one expects you to have everything under control, it’s- it’s impossible to do.”

“Yes, they do! If I am not there for everyone, if I let them see how lost I feel, they-”

“They'll what? Leave you?”, he asks shaking his head at what you’re saying

“No, yes, maybe, I don’t know. They won’t be able to handle it- I am sure.”

“Even if that were true.”, he says slowly, releasing your head from your hands, urging you to look at him, “If you can’t let your friends see, then you can show me. You can talk to me, don’t keep all that inside. There are enough self-sacrificing idiots in the Gryffindor Tower, we don’t need one more.”, he jokes and you let out a small laugh

“Why would you want to be bothered with my issues?”

“I- you, you don’t have to always be the person who cares for everyone, you can-should be the one cared for.”

“Why?”, you ask again, the air shifting between you into something different. Something that moves the pain from your chest and turns it into butterflies in your stomach.

“Ah- well-“, he let’s out a breath, “- because I- I like spending time with you, and I want to be there for you, besides, I can handle anything you shoot at me.”, he finishes; his face red and sweaty.

You have stopped crying now, your vision is still blurry and your breath uneven- but something inside you has changed. As if, a bright light has found it’s way inside, providing hope and something new- something you haven’t felt before, but desperately want to keep. 

“Thank you.”, you say softly and let him help you up, you two resuming your walk but with a different destination this time.

“Come.”, he says and offers his hand- which you gladly take, letting him guide you wherever.

You walk outside, and let the cool air hit you- ground you. It’s late at night, you are at Hogwarts, near the lake, you are at your 7th year and next to you, stands Theodore Nott, your study partner Theo. The Slytherin boy- that looks handsome but has no clue, the brilliant Theo, who always helps you out and is willing to listen. Theo, who is still holding your hand while pointing at stars and constellations with his other. Theo, who smells like pine and fireplace, as you lean against him and listen to his voice. Theo, who you can count on and thanks to whom you know it will be okay. Everything will be okay.

A/N: life will be okay with or without Theo Nott, you all deserve to be happy and loved, just needed to remind y'all :)

Theo taglist: @avalynlestrange @spacecadet16 @lucy-is-never-logical @aleviia @marina468 @annaisabookworm @liarajoah @notasadgirlipromise @pariseffer @unlikelysadgirl @ktz-bb @lizisthecoolest

[your-gf-lucy]

calm in chaos

this idea has been stuck in my head for a while so i decided to write it out also i think this is such a cute idea. everyone thank @m3ntallyunstable34 for telling me to write this i srsly would not have otherwise. also im unaware of the differences between panic attacks and anxiety attacks but I used to have panic attacks as a child bc of traumatic stuff so idk

pairing: theodore nott x gn!reader

warnings: panic attacks, angst (ish), fluff, hurt comfort, not proof read, my writing lol and that's about it

summary: you get reminded of some not so pleasant memories and the one person you never expected to even know of your existence helps you get through it.

call me crazy but i really like this one 🤭🤭

The attack wasn't a pleasant memory. Well, of course it wasn't. It fucked you up so bad that there wasn't a day that went by where you didn't see his face in your nightmares. He who almost killed you. He who lied to you. He who was called Voldemort.

Sure, being reminded of it always ruined your day, but the extremity of what happened today because of that memory fucked you up even more.

You were sitting down in the library doing your work until it had gotten dark. Your friends had left the library to go to their respective house parties. You couldn't be bothered to go what with all the assignments you had piled up that you had to work on. You were alone and it was quiet. Everything was alright. You were exhausted so you started to pack away. Everything was alright. You got up to walk to your dorm. Everything was alright.

And then it just wasn't.

You closed your eyes for a brief second and then you saw his face. And just like that all the concealed emotions were revealed.

Your body was racked with fear and the more you tried not to think about it, the more vivid the memories became. You tried to control them, tried to keep your emotions at bay but eventually, you stopped trying to fight it.

Your breathing became unsteady. Now was the worst possible time for a panic attack. All your friends were at parties and you had no one to help distract you.

Fuck.

You didn't have much time. You rushed up the stairs to the astronomy tower desperate for the slightest hint of fresh air. You stumbled into the astronomy tower just in time. Your breath was heavy, it was getting really hard to breathe.

Your body started shaking. The frozen air didn't help the shivering.

Fuck.

You really needed a friend, or even just a simple, pleasant distraction. You tried to breathe in, tried to calm yourself down but nothing seemed to help. You were going to give up.

You knew the panic attack would win. You knew he would win.

And just as you were about to give up, you felt a hand on yours.

"Hey, you okay?" you heard a voice from your left side. Turning to your left, you saw a tall body towering over you. Theodore Nott.

You knew him. Everyone knew him. Everyone wanted him. He didn't seem like the type of person to give anyone attention. Especially not you.

Yet here he was, your knight in shining armour. Talking to you. Looking at you. Caring for you.

It had been a long time since you had felt like someone cared for you. You had friends, sure, but you were never really close with them. You knew they'd leave you dead if it set them apart. You never felt as close to them as you felt with Theo at this moment. You'd never talked to him, but he was attractive and even you couldn't deny that..

You weren't even sure if he knew your name.

"Are you having a panic attack?" He repeated.

"Yeah, yeah- i- sorry- h-how do you know?" You said in between short breaths. You didn't want to be so vulnerable around him. You figured he'd make fun of you with his friends.

"Well you not being able to breathe is definitely a sign." Theo chuckled.

"Oh yeah, i guess" you smiled slightly.

"Okay, who's your least favourite professor?" Theo asked.

What? You were having a panic attack and he was concerned who your least favourite professor was? priorities

"Oh erm it's got to be umbridge." You replied.

"Oh my, that woman is a nightmare. Why do you hate her so much?" Theo continued.

"She's annoying. She likes to believe she's in power. That she's the best. But in reality, she's a stuck-up, irritating try-hard who is only a teacher so she can shout at children." You replied.

"Oh, I couldn't agree with you more," Theo replied. "Feeling better?"

You seemed to have been so occupied in insulting your defence against the dark arts teacher you seemed to have forgotten about your panic attack. Your breathing was now much more steady and your body didn't seem to shake as much.

He extended his hand to grasp yours, but before he could, you pressed yourself against his frame, embracing him tightly. Your body was racked with sobs. He was shocked at your response but quickly regained his composure and pulled you in even tighter.

"Shh" he whispered in your ear. "You'll be okay"

It was mostly quiet except for when he whispered comforting affirmations in your ear.

After a couple of minutes of you staying like this, your body completely stopped shaking and you felt stronger like it wasn't just you against the world anymore. It felt like you had someone who cared about you. Someone who was there for you. Someone who listened to you.

"Thank you. Really. I'm sure i would've passed out if it weren't for you." You smiled at him.

"It's alright." He replied.

"How did you know all this?" you asked

"What do you mean?" he questioned looking at you quizzically.

"You knew what to do when i had the panic attack. How?" you repeated.

"I have them. My mum taught me how to deal with them before she erm." Theo explained stopping abruptly at the end.

"Oh wow erm sorry"

"No you're good." He replied.

"Well thanks again, I owe you one." You said.

"No problem y/n." He replied.

He knew your name.

Theodore Fucking Nott knew your name.

[kolsangel]

TAKING SLYTHERIN BOYS SMAU(TEXTMESSAGES)/ HEADCANONS REQUESTS

[dreamcubed]

delicate | theodore nott x reader

song; delicate [taylor swift] pairing; theodore nott x fem!half-blood!ravenclaw!reader genre; s2l, angst, hurt comfort, fluff word count; 6k timeline; summer holidays between order of the phoenix and half-blood prince warnings; swearing, anxiety, social anxiety, implied selective mutism, panic attacks, implied traumatic childhood (of y/n), explicit traumatic background (of theo), mention of abusive parents (physical/unforgivable curse), (underage) alcohol consumption, mention of trauma-related nightmares (nothing graphic) summary; when your childhood friend daphne decides to drag you out to her family's californian beach house with her slytherin friends during the summer holidays, you are reluctant to come out of your carefully crafted shell. and then, out of nowhere, you find yourself relating to the quietest boy on the trip

i write theo based off @everlovingdeer ‘s interpretation of his character!

masterlist

"is it chill that you're in my head? 'cause i know that it's delicate."

———————————————

"You know what I think we all need after getting through our OWLs?" Daphne questioned loudly, sitting down among her friends in the Slytherin common room.

"What?" Mattheo asked, after seeing that no one else was going to say anything.

"Some rest and relaxation," she continued, "Perhaps on the sunny beaches of California?"

Draco looked at Daphne curiously, "You want us to go to California?"

She nodded, "My family has a beach house out there."

"It doesn't sound like a bad idea," Blaise added, "Who are you inviting?"

"All of you, obviously," she gestured to the people around her, which consisted of Mattheo, Blaise, Draco, Theo and Pansy, "And Millicent... and my parents would insist on me inviting Y/N if I use the beach house."

"Y/N? As in Y/N L/N? The weird Ravenclaw girl?" Blaise asked.

"She's not as weird as you think," Daphne rolled her eyes, "I grew up with her - she's just quiet."

Draco shook his head, "Whatever, I'll come as long as L/N's not a mudblood."

Daphne sighed, "She's not, but I don't see what difference that makes."

"What is she?" Pansy asked.

"Half-blood. That good enough for you blood status elitists?"

At the lack of response, Daphne stood up, "So, is that a yes from all of you? You'll come?"

They all muttered "yeah"s, apart from one.

"Nott, you gonna come?"

The boy's sharp blue eyes looked up at her, and while he appeared hesitant, he still nodded his head.

"Perfect, I'll go find Millicent... and then Y/N."

***

"Y/N," Daphne approached you in the library, and you looked at her curiously. Sure, you were childhood friends, but she generally didn't speak to you all that much anymore. "I wanted to invite you to my beach house this summer... in Cali."

Your eyes widened slightly, and you frowned at her, before asking quietly, "With who?"

"Uh, so we're looking at Malfoy, Zabini, Riddle, Parkinson, Bullstrode and Nott."

You chewed on your lip, thinking it over.

Sensing your hesitation, Daphne continued, "C'mon! We need you to balance out the girls and guys... it'll be fun!"

You frowned at her.

"We won't force you to hang out with us. You can share a room with me and you can shut yourself in there all day," she said, sitting down across from you, "I'm not just asking you because my parents would want me too... I figured you would want to avoid being home anyway."

That had you sighing, "Yeah, okay, I'll come."

Daphne's eyes brightened, "Really? Okay. Amazing. I'll owl you all the details."

You nodded, watching as she walked away with a spring in her step. Rowena, to have her confidence.

***

It was a sunny Monday morning when you appeared in the fireplace of Daphne's beach house with a brush of soot on your nose. Only Daphne was there thus far, as she had allowed you to travel earlier so as to settle in before the others arrived. She greeted you with a hug that made you stiffen up - she quickly pulled back and apologised.

"Our room is the first one on the right," she said, gesturing to the stairs that could be seen through the open door to the hallway, "Feel free to look around, and help yourself to anything in the kitchen."

You nodded, "Thanks."

"No worries," she waved her hand, "The others will be here in about a half hour."

And they were.

Zabini was the first to arrive, shortly followed by Parkinson, and then Bullstrode. Riddle came moments before Nott, with Malfoy as the last arrival.

You stood far back from the main living room, in the doorway to the hall, and watched as the friend group greeted each other warmly. All except Nott, who stood a bit away from them all with his hands shoved in his pockets and his expression unreadable. He must have felt your curious gaze on him, because his eyes flicked towards you, which made you panic and duck behind the wall. Cautiously, you then peered out again, to see that he was still looking in your direction with his brows furrowed - this time you found yourself unable to look away, despite the anxiety swarming inside of you.

"Alright," Daphne then announced, clapping her hands together so as to attract the attention of the entire room, "Here's who's sharing. Blaise and Draco, Theo and Mattheo, Pansy and Millicent - go and fight for you rooms or whatever, but the first on the right is mine and Y/N's."

Everyone was a bit too old to participate in a childish competition over bedrooms, so instead they all nodded and picked up their luggage, casually making their way upstairs while chatting to one another. All, of course, except Theodore Nott, who took up the back of the party and lingered beside you in the hallway for the briefest of moments.

Daphne remained stood in the lounge, watching as the others left, and made eye contact with you the second they were all gone.

"Nott caught your attention?" she said immediately, which instantly got a panicked reaction out of you.

"N- No- I- I just-"

"Babe, it's okay to be attracted to people, you know? That's normal. No need to be ashamed."

You stared at her, as attraction wasn't exactly what had made you look at him - at least not attraction in that way. Still, you did not deny what she said, as someone was coming back downstairs and you didn't want them to overhear any of the conversation.

***

For the first couple of days, you didn't participate in any group activities: you were appreciating being in a safe place for once, and were shy of the others. You hid in your room when they were at the house, and only ventured out when they headed out - which was a lot, considering it was a holiday trip. Eventually, Daphne coaxed you out to join them on a beach trip on day four. You agreed, under the condition that you could stay on the dry sandy shore.

And so there you were, sat on a blanket underneath a parasol, watching the rest of the group throw around a beach ball in the sea not far away. For some reason, Nott wasn't there yet: you hadn't been informed as to why.

You curled your fully clothed arms into your body and watched the others having fun, wishing so badly that you could get rid of the fear in your chest and join in. They all looked so happy, so care-free - well, Draco had appeared to have had something on his mind over the last couple days, but he was letting go for the moment (which was something you could never do).

Then you felt a presence beside you, and turned to see that Nott had arrived - fully clothed, just like you - and taken a seat next to you on the blanket. Alarmed, you jumped a little, not sure how to feel about being so close to someone you hardly knew.

He noticed your fear, and his eyes widened in return, "Sorry," he said quietly, "Didn't mean to scare you."

You nodded as a way of telling him it was fine, watching as his eyes curiously scanned over your features.

"Theo! Where were you, mate?" Riddle called, running up to the parasol from the sea.

The boy in question shrugged.

"Needed some alone time?"

Nott then nodded, and Riddle's expression fell into one of understanding.

"You gonna join us?" he gestured to the rest of the group.

Nott shook his head.

"What about you, L/N?"

You were surprised that he had acknowledged you at all, and if you weren't already relatively mute, it would have rendered you speechless.

Your reaction told Riddle everything he needed to know, and he simply said, "No worries, at least neither of you are alone on the beach, then I'd feel bad," before running back to the water.

"Ice cream," Nott said out of nowhere, making you turn your head to him in confusion. He glanced at you. "I want ice cream."

You stared at him with your head tilted as he stood up.

"Do you... do you want to... come?"

Your head movements were saying 'yes' before your anxiety could counteract them, so you found yourself forced to stand up and follow Nott.

There was an ice cream van parked near the back of the beach, obviously muggle, with a display of both ice creams and ice lollies surrounding the window. The queue was pretty long due to the busyness of the beach, and you tentatively joined the back of it alongside Nott. Someone jostled into you as they crossed through the queue to get to the other side, which sent a lightning bolt of panic up your spine. With Nott being the only remotely familiar person around, your body instinctively moved closer to his in search of safety.

He didn't object, but instead delicately hovered his hand over your lower back, looking around for anyone else who might push into you.

When you reached the front, Nott ordered his ice cream, and then when the ice cream woman turned to you, you didn't know what else to do except point at the frozen treat you wanted. Nott read it aloud for the ice cream woman, who then typed something into her till and read out the price. After fishing in his pockets for a few muggle coins, you watched cautiously as Nott tried to make sense of them, and after a few seconds you reached into his hand and collected the right amount, before handing them to the woman.

Once your ice creams were handed to you, the two of you began walking back to the parasol in silence. It was then you realised that Nott had just paid for your ice cream, and you quickly rushed to say, "I'll pay you back."

His eyes snapped to you, making you register the fact that it was his first time hearing your voice - a privilege exclusive to very few.

"You-" he stuttered, "I-" he clearly decided not to say whatever his first thought was, and instead chose to say, "Don't pay me back."

"But-"

"Nott! Y/N!" Daphne interrupted you, as you had just reached the parasol, "You got ice cream without us?"

Nott shrugged, as he seemed to do a lot.

"Anyway, we were gonna go get some surfboards and try out the waves further down the beach," she said, "I assume neither of you are interested, but you're both still absolutely welcome."

You shook your head at her.

"Anyway, we're gonna move the stuff down with us, so you'll still have to come with if you want shelter."

When you were settled back under the parasol, this time further along the coast, and the others were trying (and failing) to catch waves, you decided it was time to pull out the book you had brought. You arranged some of the bags as pillows and curled up against them with the book securely in your hold. Nott added more to the bag-pillow situation to allow enough space for him to use them as well from a comfortable distance - and you glanced up from your book to watch as he closed his eyes.

He must have felt your eyes on him, because he opened them again and turned his head to look at you, which made you use your book to cover your face. You could've sworn he smirked a little, before closing his eyes again - this time, he appeared to doze off.

You don't know how long you both remained like that, but you had never felt so comfortable and safe in your entire life.

***

It wasn't until the sun began setting did the others finally call it quits from the beach, and begin heading elsewhere. Daphne seemed to be pretty pleased with the tan she achieved from sunbathing, and was admiring her more golden skin as everyone walked. Bullstrode then suggested going to a restaurant - since it was too late to cook - and the others quickly voiced their agreement to the idea. You would have preferred to head back to the beach house, but you didn't want to do that alone since it was getting dark, so you sucked it up and joined them.

It was a classic beach restaurant that they chose: full of seafood delicacies. Everyone grabbed drinks from the bar before heading to a free table, and Daphne was kind enough to order yours for you. After taking a seat, she rushed to take one of the places beside you, which you were thankful for - she had always been a good friend. You were even more thankful when Nott sat on your other side, as you were more comfortable with him than most the others.

You scanned the menu for several moments before making a decision: you were a picky eater, which made it easier to narrow down the options.

"Good evening, folks, how can I help you all?" a waitress approached the table, her strong valley girl American accent immediately catching your attention.

"What are you having?" Nott asked while the others gave their orders.

You pointed at your choice, and watched in surprise as he ordered both for himself and for you when his turn came. Upon observing the reactions of the rest of the table, you realised they were surprised too - especially Daphne. You didn't like all eyes being trained in your direction, and stared at your lap out of embarrassment.

Eventually, conversation on the table continued while you waited for the food to come. You had no idea what to do with yourself while you waited, finding yourself staring at the bags you had all brought from the beach that were settled by the table.

Upon allowing yourself a glance at Nott, you saw that he too was staring at a random spot, and it was at that moment you felt a strange sense of solidarity with him. For the first time in your life, you felt an overwhelming desire to talk to someone and get to know them, regardless of the consequences.

If only your anxiety allowed you to do that.

***

The following day, it quickly became evident that there would be no event of the day, and that most people would be lounging around the beach house. You knew the solitude in the place wouldn't last forever, but were still disappointed when you came down for breakfast to find the kitchen diner occupied by a couple others. However, your heart flipped when you saw that Nott was one of them: he was sat at the breakfast bar with a bowl of cereal and a book.

Your entrance caused him to look up, and for the briefest of moments, your eyes locked with each other and your heart flipped a second time. Rowena, what was wrong with you?

Discreetly, you ventured over to the fridge to see what surprises it held in store for you, and were delighted to see a brand new pot of yoghurt. You prepared it in a bowl and poured honey over the top, before grabbing a spoon and settling down at the breakfast bar - in the spot right next to Nott, since most of the bar was covered in letters and random possessions and therefore uninhabitable.

It was strange that you didn't feel scared to be so close to him.

After breakfast, you hid yourself back in your and Daphne's room with your book, finding yourself quickly lost in the fantasy world. You went back out a few times for food and drinks, but didn't properly put down the book until music started playing loudly downstairs. Curious, you decided to investigate, and found everyone dancing and drinking alcohol.

"My mum started collecting muggle CDs a while back," you heard Daphne explain to Zabini and Parkinson while you lingered in the doorway, "My dad always claimed to be against it, but he got her this muggle CD player thingy for her birthday."

"What's a CD?" Parkinson asked, which made you chuckle to yourself.

That was when you spotted Nott stood outside on the decking - alone - with the sliding doors shut behind him. You frowned, and found that your body was pushing you in his direction without consulting your brain. On the way, you grabbed a cider from the twelve-pack on the sideboard, and cracked it open before opening the glass door.

You shut it behind you, marvelling in how the sound of music instantly quietened, and approached Nott. The beach house was situated on a hill, meaning the decking doubled as a balcony of sorts on one side of it, and that was where he was: resting his arms on the rail.

He was evidently surprised to see that it was you.

"I thought you were Mattheo," he said blankly, like a filler statement.

"Sorry to disappoint," you said under your breath, but it wouldn't have been difficult for him to hear.

He glanced at you with a small frown, and you realised that he must be at least tipsy with how expressive he was being.

"I'm not disappointed," he finally said, staring at the view of the sea and lit-up beach houses in the dark.

You took a sip of the cider before resting your arms on the railing a short distance from him, gazing at the admittedly gorgeous view in all its tranquility.

"I was surprised you came on this trip," he broke the silence with a softened tone.

"Wasn't everyone?" you replied, treasuring how easily the words were leaving your mouth.

He hummed.

"I'm surprised you came," you said, which made him look at you.

"Why?"

"Well, not before the trip, but now I know more about you, I'm surprised you came. Beach trips don't seem like your cup of tea."

You felt small with how he stared at you then, beginning to regret saying the longest sentence you had said since you were a young child. The negative thoughts disappeared when Nott spoke again.

"Anything to get away from home." He said it under his breath, as if there was a serious meaning behind it, which you highly suspected there was. "What about you?"

"Hm?"

"You," he repeated, "Beach trips don't seem like your cup of tea either."

You took another sip of the cider. "Same reason as you."

Just as he opened his mouth to reply, the sliding door opened and the volume of the music increased tenfold. Riddle, evidently under the influence, walked through the door with the biggest grin on his face.

"Theo, my man, what are you doing out here?" he then looked at you, "Ooh, sorry, have I interrupted something?"

"Go back inside, Matt," Nott sighed, "You're very drunk."

He shook his head, and threw an arm over your shoulder clumsily, which caused frozen fear to ripple through your veins. "How are you this fine evening, Y/N?"

It was easy to get out of his hold while he wasn't sober, and you quickly bolted inside and all the way through to the stairs, having dropped your cider on the outside decking. Nott stared at the golden liquid leaking on to the wooden floor, before looking up at Riddle exasperatedly. The latter's face was guilt-ridden, but the former didn't care in the slightest.

"What the fuck, mate?" Nott spat, before running inside after you.

Daphne had seen you hurry past, and was just on her way to check on you when she saw that she had been beaten to the punch. All she could do was watch, mesmerised, as the person she was least close to out of everyone there (and not out of lack of trying on her behalf) appeared desperate to make sure you were okay.

Upstairs, you sat curled up by the foot of your bed, rocking back and forth as tears threatened to spill out. Their threats weren't empty, and your cheeks were soon dampened and flushed.

A knock sounded on the door, but you ignored it.

"Y/N?" it was Nott- Theo.

After you didn't reply, you watched as he gently pushed the door open and peered in, quickly spotting you. Silently, he walked over to you and sat down, not right next to you, but pretty close by. You flinched at the proximity.

"I won't hurt you," he said softly, "I couldn't."

You glanced at him unsurely.

"I could never hurt anyone, I don't think. I know too much of what it's like to be hurt for no reason."

You sniffed, shifting over to Theo slightly, as you understood what he was implying and it made you more inclined to trust him.

"Who?" you asked quietly.

"My dad," he said, his voice turned hollow, "He's a fan of the Cruciatus Curse."

Your eyes widened - your body was moving to embrace his before you could stop it. Theo stiffened when you first wrapped your arms around his torso, but he soon relaxed and returned it.

You felt droplets begin to dampen the top of your head, making it apparent to you that Theo had started crying as well. Neither of you commented on it, and instead remained curled up on the floor of the bedroom in wordless tranquility for Merlin knows how long.

***

It was a cold sweat that you woke up in, before the sun was even threatening to rise. Your chest was tight and your breathing was uneven, but you were relieved to be awake. You looked over at Daphne, who was sound asleep in her twin bed, and let out a massive breath. It had been a while since you'd had a nightmare like that.

Thirsty. You were thirsty. You needed water.

Quietly, but shakily, you crept out of bed and across to the door, wincing when the dim hallway light blinded you. You stumbled over to the bathroom door, only to find that it was locked.

It opened moments after you had tried the handle.

"Y/N?" Millicent.

You blinked at her a couple times.

"Is... is Daphne in there alone?" she gestured to your bedroom.

You nodded, confused.

"Do you think she'd want to see me?"

It finally registered what Millicent was insinuating, and you nodded thoughtlessly, waving her in the direction of Daphne. She thanked you, and as you shoved your head under the bathroom tap, you realised that the prior interaction likely meant you were out of a place to sleep for the night: which was especially unideal due to you still being shaken from the nightmare.

When you left the bathroom, you decided to go downstairs and potentially crash on one of the sofas, but soon discovered that Mattheo was passed out on one of them. Evidently, he had been too drunk to even make it up the stairs.

It also meant that Theo was alone in his room.

Maybe you were still out of it from the nightmare, or maybe you didn't feel close enough to Mattheo to crash on the other sofa next to him and decided Theo was the better option - maybe it was both. Either way, you found yourself stumbling back up the stairs and across the hall to the room you knew to be Theo's.

You didn't knock, you just opened the door. It was when the door shut behind you that you came to your senses, but it was too late - Theo had woken up.

"Y/N?" he said quietly, in a raspy deep voice.

"Hi," you mumbled, tucking your arms behind you awkwardly.

"You okay?" he sat up straight, more alert than moments before, with his eyebrows furrowed.

You didn't know what to say in response.

He got out of bed and walked over to you, trying to analyse your face in the darkened room. All you could do was gaze up at him; as you stared into his shadowed eyes, your mind went blank of any prior concern. Once he had deduced that you weren't crying, he asked, "What are you doing here?" It wasn't a confrontational or rude question, just a curious and confused one.

"I-" you paused, not knowing what to say, "Bullstrode- Millicent- went in with Daphne."

"Oh."

"I- I should-"

"You need a place to sleep then?"

Ashamedly, you nodded, feeling blood rush to your ears.

"Okay," he said simply, walking back over to the double bed he had been sharing with Mattheo the last few days.

You stared at his silhouette as he got back under the covers.

"Getting in or not?" he said, his voice muffled from his head being buried in the pillows.

Just like that, your body snapped to life and you hurried to the other side of the bed, slipping under the covers and appreciating the warmth they had to offer. For a few moments, you lay in silence, but you could tell that Theo was still awake from his breathing pattern.

"I had a nightmare," you said under your breath, hoping you wouldn't have to repeat yourself.

Theo turned over to face you. "You want to talk about it?"

You shook your head.

"Okay."

Then you asked him a question, but you were nervous to ask it, so muffled your words with the pillow.

"Hm? I didn't catch that."

You repeated it, still talking into the pillow.

"Still didn't get that," he said tiredly, his eyes closed.

"Canwecuddle?" you said as quickly as you could to make up for the lack of self-protective muffling.

You expected more of a reaction from Theo, but he simply hummed and extended an arm towards you. For a few seconds, you stared at it, but eventually rolled on to the limb, to then be pulled into his body pretty tightly. Touch had always scared you - no, petrified you - but, as you rested in Theo's warmth, all you could feel was safe.

***

Day six was the last full day in the beach house, and you were sad to have to think about heading back home. Still, you were hiding from everyone - you and Theo sleeping in the same bed had been the hottest topic of the group ever since a hungover Mattheo stumbled back into his bedroom in the morning to get a change of clothes.

With you staying in the shadows, nothing more happened between you and Theo that day, apart from sitting beside each other during meals.

Day seven - the day of departure - was a depressing day for you. You stood in the living room with your packed bags, watching as everyone hugged each other and stepped into the fireplace. Daphne would obviously be the last to leave, and as you stood in front of her to say your goodbyes, she offered you a fist bump. At that, you couldn't help but smile, and connected your fist with hers.

"Bye, Nott," she said, looking past your shoulder to the boy, who was the last of the others left.

After he didn't provide a verbal reply, you turned to look at him, and just the sight of him made your smile stretch even wider. In the corner of your eye, you watched Daphne grin and slip out of the room.

"I'll see you back at school, yeah?" he said.

You nodded enthusiastically. "Of course."

There was an awkward silence for a few seconds, but then he leaned down to quickly peck your lips. "Don't feel shy about coming up to me."

Not even the most powerful erasing spell could get the grin off your face, and as you watched Theo step into the fireplace with a handful of floo powder, you found your fingers delicately brushing over the skin of your now-tingling lips.

***

Like usual, you arrived at Platform Nine and Three Quarters alone, which was better than the alternative. You scanned the crowd for the one person that you desperately wanted to see above all else, but had no luck. When the conductor began beckoning students on to the train, you sighed and started pulling your trunk behind you as you made your way to the shiny red transport. It didn't take long to get your trunk sorted away and find yourself an empty compartment, due to you being one of the few students that didn't spend the last few moments saying goodbye to loved ones.

Despite Theo's last words to you, you were beginning to feel anxious that he wouldn't want to see you - scrap that, you had been feeling anxious all summer about it. You hadn't seen or heard from him since the trip.

And then, out of nowhere, your compartment door slid open and in came Mattheo, Theo and Daphne - in that order. They all greeted you, with Theo in particular sitting by your side. You couldn't take your eyes off him, and were struggling to suppress the smile that wanted to break out: he could likely see the way the corners of your mouth twitched.

He didn't say anything to you, but instead slipped his hand into yours. It was only then you realised that he was shaking and immediately grew worried. The look in your eyes silently asked the obvious question.

Theo shook his head. "Later."

You nodded, squeezing his hand tightly and moving into his side.

***

Rumour had it that potions was significantly better now that Snape had been replaced by Slughorn - although, as a result, defence against the dark arts had gotten significantly worse. The inconsistency of DADA professors had always been a massive stressor for you at the beginning of new years, wondering whether you would be taught by someone who was understanding of your needs or not.

Though, your main focus at the beginning of sixth year was everything that Theo had to tell you about the remainder of his summer holidays.

You had already guessed most of it before you had a chance to talk in private: his father had been particularly abusive after the beach trip, as he was prone to be whenever he was about to not have Theo as a punching bag for a long period of time. Apparently, it was even worse than past summer holidays, due to the stress Nott Sr was under as a death eater.

Thus, your mind had been too absent to properly acknowledge the fact that Snape was the second worst DADA professor that you had ever had - second only to Umbridge. You had hoped that last year's bad luck in the professor department had meant you would have some more luck this year - it hadn't. Plus, after dropping potions, you had assumed that Snape would never teach you again.

"Miss L/N," Snape drawled, snapping you out of your thoughts, "I asked you a question."

You stared at him blankly.

"Surely, as a Ravenclaw witch, you would be capable of developing some other means of communication if unable to talk."

The panic lit aflame in your core: it then felt as if the walls around you were closing in, and as if every pair of beady fellow student eyes were pinned on you like hawks.

Your heartbeat quickened.

Your temperature spiked.

Your eyes watered.

And then, your fight or flight response kicked in - yours being almost always the latter. You were out of your seat and darting out the room faster than a golden snitch, running down the corridors with blurred vision. You only stopped running when you rounded the corner and almost ran into McGonagall. She appeared about to scold you for sprinting in the corridors, but then noticed your state, and hurried to move you into an empty nearby classroom.

"There you go, sit down," she pulled out a chair for you, which you practically collapsed into, sobs scraping out of your throat. "Whatever happened, Miss L/N?"

All you could do was look up at her silhouette through your teary eyes.

"Did you come from a lesson?"

You nodded.

Realisation dawned on the Gryffindor head's face. "Professor Snape's lesson, by any chance?"

Again, you nodded, still choking through sobs.

You watched as McGonagall grew pensive and stood back, her posture alarmingly straight.

"Th- Theo," you stuttered out.

"Theo? Theodore Nott?" You could tell McGonagall was marvelled at hearing you speak - even if it was just one word.

Another nod from you.

"Did he upset you?"

You frowned, shaking your head hurriedly.

"Would you... like me to fetch him?"

Your reaction told her the answer, and she swiftly exited the room, to return several minutes later with the boy you so desperately desired comfort from - with worry ridden on his face. The second he was fully in the classroom, you barrelled forward into his chest, only faintly hearing the door shut as McGonagall slipped back out.

"I'm here now, darling," he murmured, holding you tightly, "I'm here."

"Why?" you cried, muffled by his jumper, "Why do I overreact so much?"

"Because you've been taught that you aren't safe," he said gently, "As have I."

You hugged him even harder.

***

-THREE YEARS LATER-

***

"I'm home," Theo's voice echoed throughout the house.

You immediately shot up from your seat and ran to the entrance lobby, where your handsome husband was taking his shoes off.

"Someone's excited to see me."

"Shut up," you mumbled, moving into his embrace nonetheless, "I've had a long boring day of painting walls."

"You've been decorating without me?"

"Just the guest rooms," you waved your hand dismissively after parting from his hold.

"Surely it can't have taken long with magic."

"Maybe if we'd gotten a smaller house."

Theo smiled sheepishly, "My family's money was gonna sit in that vault forever if we didn't use it."

Ever since Nott Sr had been sent to Azkaban for life, the Nott manor and contents of the Nott vault had been left to his only child: Theo. Due to Theo's dark memories of his childhood house, he sold it, and together you spent a couple years searching for a new place to call home.

"We hardly used any of the money from the vault for this place," you rebuked, "We bought this with the money from the old house."

"Ah, fair point," he kissed you delicately on the lips.

"D'you think it's too big?"

"Who cares? As long as it's a fresh start for the both of us."

You couldn't believe it had only been two years since Voldemort's demise, and three since you began a relationship with Theo. Perhaps his proposal right after the Battle of Hogwarts had been too soon, but you knew that there was no one else you could ever feel the same way about. Theo was the closest thing to family you had ever had, and marrying him made him that official - you had been nothing but elated when he asked you.

It had been a small ceremony, of course, with only very close friends.

"I can't wait to finally live in a house full of love, darling, especially as it's with you," Theo placed a kiss on your forehead, making you shove him gently in his chest.

"That's called a home, my love," you smiled back at him.

———————————————

masterlist

written; 23/08/2022 —> 23/09/2022 published; 25/09/2022 edited; —/—/——

[unofficiallymikaela]

Luna is a sweet girl—that's what people tend to think about her but when she sees Theo get overwhelmed with all the people still judging him because of his father, Luna can get a little protective. Nobody would want Luna on their bad side.

[lou-lj]

always there for you

theodor nott x fem reader

(fluff/ hurt comfort)

summary: Theo invites you to a slithering party but it doesn’t go as planned (also y’all not a couple but the crush is incredibly visible) (maybe i should write more about how this crush develops?)

warnings: anxiety attack

“Hey Y/n, i’ve searched the whole castle for you! How long have you been in here?” The tall brown haired boy stood before you with his green tie hanging loose around his neck. “Theo maybe you forgot, but we have to write our transfiguration essay to next week, which makes half of our grade.“ A small smile flys over his features as he closes the books lying in front of you. “That answered my question, let’s go eat dinner, pansy is saving your favorite pie.” You stretched while a yawn escaped your mouth “Oh that does sound nice.” Theo collected your pullover, books and bag as you shoved your writing utensils in said bag. Which he draped over his shoulder lightly shoving you out the library.

Together you arrived at the great hall where some people were already eating, while others just arrived or left. You went over to his friend group sitting down next to Blaise, “Hey you look as if you just woke up, here.” He handed you something that looked like juice but when you tried it the strong alcohol was definitely noticeable. “Y’all partying tonight or what’s that for?” you asked as you gave the cup back to the grinning boy. “Yeah, well actually the Stytherins are throwing a party for our quidditch team tonight. I wanted to ask if you maybe would come, just if you want to i know partys aren’t your thing, but i thought maybe youd be down to celebrate my win… I mean not my win just you know i part of the team and-" Pansy came to his rescue as he began to loose the topic in his ramble. “I’ll be there too, we’ll all be and we’d like you to come!“ You gave it a thought but decided to agree, if you didn’t like it you could just leave. It wouldn’t be a big deal “Sure i come to celebrate you Theo.“ you said while shooting him a wink. “Here you are y/n! We need you, Mandy cut her own hair and is now having a mental breakdown.“ Sue Li one of your roommates stood behind you, smiling apologetic. “Oh man ok sure, see y’all later!“ With that you vanished out the hall.“She forgot to eat, i’ll save her some for later right? Yes she should eat before drinking.“ Pansy laughed at Theo, while Draco shook his head “God you’re so crushing on this girl!“ “What? No way.”

After helping your friends and changing out of your uniform your watch was already on 8:45pm so you just quickly fixed up your hair and then sprinted to the slytherin common room. As you walked in Pansy who was clearly drunk hugged you. “Guys she made it!” The others cheered, as she dragged you onto some sort of dance area. The room was incredibly crowded and a heavy smell of sweat and alcohol mixed in your nose. “Here have a drink.” Matheo shoved a beer in your hand which came very handy for you as your mouth grew dryer every second. You took a sip while trying to relax. Theo who stood next to you leaned down to talk to you “I’m glad you still made it, everything fine with Mandy?” “Yeah we made it work, sorry that i’m late.” “No worry’s.”

The party grew even more crowded and louder every minute and you didn’t feel comfortable but the others were having fun so you weren’t gonna say anything. But Theo’s eyes were constantly on you and he didn’t need you to say anything in order of sensing your anxiousness. “Hey let’s get out of here yeah?”

He took your hand and lead you to his room. “You ok?” He turned to you after closing the door. Tears were streaming down your cheeks and your hands were trembling out of no where. “I- I don’t know Theo-“ He rushed to your side patting your cheeks dry with his sleeve. “Hey y/n look at me, you’re ok, alright? Breathe with me, come on let’s sit down.” he sat down on a bed placing you on his lap. You buried your head in his chest as he soothingly caressed your back.

“Ah shit i’m sorry for all this.” you half laugh after calming down. Theo shook his head while smiling at you “Nah stop being sorry for this kinda stuff i’m glad you’re ok.” “I’ll wash my face, be right back.” He nodded while opening a window. As you came back a slight breeze was coming from the window where Theo sat. “Come here, I took some food from diner cause you left with out eating and-“ You smiled while walking towards him, “Thanks,” you sat down next to him unpacking the food while leaning onto his chest “not just for the food but for helping me and being there for me.” “I didn’t mind. I’ll always be there for you, ya know that?”

A/N: Hey guys, I’m not really happy with how this fic turned out, but I wanted to post something cause I feel like it’s been some time. I don’t even know what’s going on I just hadn’t had the time or motivation to write much lately. I hope y’all still happy with what i put on here cause i’m just confused with myself hahah….. idk what this note is, live with it or don’t i’m a mess it happens sorry, love y’all :)

[wixafix]

Theodore Nott x reader

Soft, fluff.

It's Yule, and war is nearing. Only you and Theodore stayed in Slytherin.

I Noticed (Part 1)

It was dim as always, a little green and a little cold but it was comforting, knowing there wasn't the chaos of the castle in here... at least in the holidays.

You weren't sure what time it was, you couldn't be bothered to check but you'd woken up awake which probably meant it was early, despite that sounding strange.

Fire was roaring green in one grate and the Yule log sat burning in another, you rubbed you eyes with your pyjama sleeve whilst your other hand gripped your sketchbook. Tucking your feet under you sit by the fire and flip it open, not remembering where you stopped last night and just starting something new.

There was a soft rustle after a little while and you glance a little over your shoulder, Nott headed over to the Yule log grate, a small pile of presents floating behind him. He was in your year and like you usually had your nose in a sketchbook, he had his in a novel or any sort of book really. He gave Granger and run for her money and she read a lot.

"Hey." His voice was a little sleepy and quiet but it caught your attention anyways. "You mind if I put some music on?" He held up a record player and you shook your head.

"Go ahead." He nodded and you hesitated before turning back to the page. You two always stayed for Yule but it was the first time there wasn't someone else. Voldemort's war creeping nearer meant people felt safer at home behind familial wards or in the arms of their parents.

After a little while of hearing instrumental tunes drift through the common room and a rustle of paper a shadow edged your sketchbook. Nott stood beside you, hand holding a small wrapped box stretched out towards you.

"Happy Yule."

"Oh um, Happy Yule."

"You can have it." He waved it a little sitting down on the other end of the sofa, pulling his own knees up to his chest. "It's Draco's tag gift for me so its probably not very interesting but you can have it." You eye him for a moment but set your sketchbook on the table before facing him and crossing your legs, your foot a little numb with pins and needles from sitting on it. Taking it gently you look at him before doing anything else with it.

"Why are you giving me this?"

"You never have any to open, I wanted to... share."

"You didn't have any in our first two years either." He crossed his arms on top of his knees and rested his head on them.

"You remember that?"

"There's never very many of us here and we were the only ones without." You looked down at the black and silver marble effect wrapping paper.

"I made friends." Nott said as explanation for his appearance of presents, you had noticed.

"I didn't." You smile, you had people you spoke to and sat beside in class but you went to Hogsmeade alone and walked alone, no one really bothered either so it was a bonus as a Slytherin.

"I noticed." You pulled the silver ribbon and paper undid in your hands producing a box of Honeydukes salted fudge, one of their more usual or maybe Muggle flavours.

"Thank you, Nott." You flipped the box open and held it out to Nott.

"Call me Theo."

"Then you can call me, y/n" You both share a soft smile, a barely there twist of the lips a crinkle at the edge of you eyes.

~~{ Wixafix [Wixabear] }~~

[orangecoluredsky]

Comfort character tag game

Saw this over on @rhyslahey's blog

Tag a pal: @wombatrat & @poisonousbeautifulhope

rules: list your top 5 comfort characters and include a gif of each!

1 - Theodore Nott (fancast: Brandon Flynn)

2 - Regulus Black (fancast: Timothée Chalamet)

3 - Fergus Fraser

4 - Gendry Baratheon

5 - Steve Harrington

[sophal22]

Heyyy! So i have been reading fan fictions on here for almost 2 years now and i finally decided i will start writing some myself. So if you have any wishes what i should write about tell me :) also english isn’t my first language so sorry if i make any mistakes.

I will write fluff, angst, comfort and hurt for these characters:

(I don’t strictly only write about those characters you can also ask about others but i can’t promise that i know them :))

Outer Banks:

JJ Maybank

Harry Potter:

Golden era

Theo Nott

Mattheo Riddle

Draco Malfoy

Pansy Parkinson

Marauder era

Remus Lupin

Sirius Black

James Potter

Regulus Black

Stranger Things:

Eddie Munson

Steve Harrington

Robin Buckley

Hunger Games:

Finnik Odair

ALSO I’M TOTALLY COOL WITH LGTBQ+ RELATED STUFF AND I WOULD ALSO WRITE ABOUT POLY RELATIONSHIPS AS LONG AS THERE IS NO INCEST!

[tomriddleslove]

What’s left of me?

✩Mattheo Riddle x Reader

Summary: The one where your pursuit for excellence leads you down a path of self destruction, and you’re slowly loosing yourself. You didn’t expect a certain boy in your year would be your saving grace. Alternatively: Mattheo makes you realise you’re more than what you think you are.

A/N: I guess this could very easily be like a prequel to the other mattheo one shot ‘i’m here’. This is definitely a bit self indulgent but we all have our things 😻😻

Warnings: Allusions to overdosing (brief), mentions of not eating.

Songs: Nothings New - Rio Romeo

18 days.

18 days till you would be finished with all of this.

Technically, it would actually be 408 days till you finished school and graduated from this godforsaken place, but 18 more till you finished with exams.

You weren’t sure how many more hours you could spend hunched over indecipherable handwriting, pouring over text till your eyes stung and your back ached. Surrounded by a stack of books and rolls of parchment, you couldn’t even begin to figure out where you ended and the library began. You had taken up a huge table (that could seat at least 4) for the better part of 17 hours, sat on the same chair since 6:00 am.

You stifle a small groan of pain as you roll your wrist, stiff and sore from the hell that was ancient runes.

There are ink splotches all over your skin, and you’re sure the amount of work you were pouring into this stopped being effective nearly 5 hours ago.

Your eyes flicker up and scan over the once-packed library that had slowly dwindled down to a few students, half of whom were in the same boat as you.

To you, being the last person in the library was a huge sign of success. It meant you were more dedicated and more hard-working.

In reality, the truth couldn’t be any further from that, but in your mind, if you weren’t milking yourself over every last piece of work it simply wasn’t being done right.

The hushed murmurs and sounds of parchment being unfurled fade into the background as your quill scratches furiously against the parchment, mind running at a million miles an hour.

You ignore the pang in your stomach as you work; you haven’t eaten today. You didn’t want to get up at any point to get food, for fear of your place being taken.

Now, you didn’t want to get up for another reason. It was well past the library's open hours and Madame Pince was angrily fussing about, bustling around everyone as she got them to leave. A testament to how long you had been there, she didn’t even seem to notice you, and you were worried getting up and walking about would break this sort of invisibility shield you had going on.

Come to think of it, you hadn’t really drunk any water either. You brought your bottle with you but had forgotten to fill it up. It was fine though, the human body could last for 3 days without water - it could wait. Your upcoming exams were far more important.

In Scandinavia, the Elder Futhark remained in use until some time around the eighth century (the time of the Eddas), when drastic changes in the Old Norse language occurred, and corresponding changes in the runic alphabet were made to accommodate the new sounds. However, unlike the Anglo-Saxon Futhorc, the Younger Futhark (as it is now called) reduced the number of runes from 24 to 16, and several runes came to represent multiple sounds. The forms of the runes were also changed and simplified.

Gods, you couldn't take this anymore. You felt sick and exhausted. You ignore the hunger that gnaws at your stomach, rubbing a hand over your face as you contemplate finishing off and going to bed.

But every time you think of stopping a horrible feeling emerges in your stomach, consuming you with anxiety. The weight of impending exams and the fear of not doing well gnawing at your determination. You glance at the clock, realizing it's well past midnight, and the library is now completely empty except for you.

Madame Pince, finally noticing your presence, approaches with a disapproving look. "You know, the library does close at a certain hour. I can't have students staying here all night," she scolds, but her tone softens as she sees the exhaustion in your eyes.

“Sorry. I lost track of time” You mumble, haphazardly cramming your stuff into your bag. You get up, and the room spins for a second. You stumble but manage to catch yourself, holding onto the table as Madam Pince reaches out a hand to help you recover.

“You need to take care of yourself. No exam is worth this much stress,” She says, eyeing you with concern. If only she knew how far that was from the truth. You felt as though you had so little to your name. Performing well, overachieing. That was what you were known for. It was the only thing you felt was yours. Everyone else had character, they were distinctly themselves. They had hobbies, interests, and friendships that defined them. But for you, it was always about excelling academically. Without that, you became nobody. You were no more than the number on your papers, and the reminder weighed down on you like an unrelenting burden.

By some miracle you manage to stumble down the empty halls of the castle into the Slytherin common room, which seemed paradoxically warm considering its grandiose stone structure and dark, moody lighting. You carelessly drop your bag onto a table closest to the fireplace, trudging up to your room as you battle the sleep that threatens to consume you.

It's dark, and your roommates have long gone to bed.

“Lumos” You murmur, hiding the blinding light that emerges from the tip of your wand with the lining of your school robes, dimming it slightly. You grope blindly at your bedside drawer, stopping when you feel the familiar smooth glass bottle, that fits perfectly in your palm. You slip it into the pocket of your robes, slowly shutting the drawer as you make your way back down to the common room. You dismiss the light that shines from your wand, tossing it onto the sofa as you take a seat on the floor, in front of the low table. You read the instructions on the back of the small bottle as if you hadn’t been consuming this religiously for the past month.

Wideye potion User Guidance:

Take no more than one teaspoon every 6 hours. Effects will last for up to 8 hours. Excessive use of this potion may lead to adverse effects, and in rare cases, severe bodily harm. Users are advised not to use the maximum dosage for a consecutive 72 hours.

You’ve read it so many times, you were sure you could recite it by heart. Choosing not to heed any warnings, you pop open the cork and down the whole bottle in one go. The rancid taste of the potion burns, eliciting a shudder down your spine as you swallow down the bile that threatens to emerge. Pocketing the empty glass bottle, you stretch your arms before retrieving your books, ready to continue working.

If you were lucky, the potion might give you a boost of energy for about 3 hours or so. You had been taking it so much you had developed a sort of immunity to it, and the effects were not as potent as they used to be. The sacrifice of your well-being for the sake of productivity had become a routine, a desperate attempt to squeeze every ounce of time and focus out of your exhausted mind and body.

You have attempted to brew a stronger concoction, in the misplaced hopes that increasing the potency would counteract the effect of the immunity. However, the violent cramps and palpitations it had given you very quickly told you that wouldn't work.

You knew it was bad. It was causing irreversible damage to your body, killing you at worst. It simply wasn't sustainable. But you couldn't drag yourself out of that mindset.

Failure. Nobody.

You gritted your teeth and carried on working.

You managed to get through another potions essay, and the time on your watch read 1:00 am.

You could carry on for longer, right?

You zone out for a second, staring off at the orange embers that emerged from the fireplace, shining bright for what seemed like a millisecond before falling to the floor, turning into nothing but ash.

The orange embers flicker, and for a moment, you see yourself in them – a fleeting brightness that threatens to be extinguished. The battle between ambition and self-preservation rages on as you grit your teeth and carry on working, oblivious to the embers slowly falling into nothingness, much like your own fading sense of self.

“Why on earth are you up at this hour doing work?” A voice calls from behind you, and the momentary intrusion shocks you, sending a burst of energy through you as you spin around.

Flopping down onto the sofa next to you, leaning back with his legs lazily outstretched, was none other than Mattheo Riddle. Clad in a plain grey sweatshirt and black jeans, he eyes you with curiosity, smelling distinctively of smoke. He had most likely been out, as he so usually was at this hour. You shrug, turning back to your work.

“Exams. Need to revise” You mumble, voice cracking. You swallow, massaging your dry throat as you grimace, trying to get back to your writing.

“Revise? Merlin, you're the smartest person in our year. You don't need to be revising” Matthep leans forward, plucking a piece of parchment from your pile and examining it with a raised eyebrow.

You snatch it back, a protective instinct kicking in despite the fatigue. You hated that sentiment. Despised it, even. People always assumed your performance came naturally. That you were simply born with the ability to do well. No one seemed to consider what you had to do to get to that point, how you wore yourself down, day in and day out, till you either passed out from exhaustion or pain, neglecting your most basic needs.

"I might be the 'smartest' person, but that doesn't mean I can afford to slack off," you reply, a hint of frustration in your voice. The adrenaline from the sudden interruption starts to ebb away, leaving you feeling even more drained.

Mattheo leans back, momentarily caught off guard by your defensiveness. He had never seen you this on edge. He was so accustomed to seeing you as this familiar presence during the school day his partner for the many lessons that he didn’t have his friends in. The two of you would work together and on rare occasions, hang out with one another in the common room as well. It was a rather unlikely duo, the king of Slytherin and the academic prodigy. Yet, More often than not Mattheo found himself seeking out your presence. He never admitted it outright, but he hugely admired you. Your intelligence, your drive, it all captivated him. There were times when he hoped he could be only half the person you were.

How funny it was, for you felt the very same thing when you saw him. He seemed content. Happy. He was loved by nearly everyone. Popular, with a fun social life. He had everything you wanted without putting in any of the work.

You wanted to be like him. But you weren’t. And if you wanted anything like what he had, you had to work damn hard for it. So that's what you did. With a small sigh, you turn back to your work.

“Hey,” He says gently, his voice softening slightly. "I’m sorry. I say stupid things sometimes.” He apologies, brows furrowed as he looks at your back facing him.

“It's fine. I should be saying sorry. You didn't say anything, I just…. I’m just a bit tired, that's all.” You mumble, apologising as you get up. You stretch, a yawn escaping your lips as you wearily rub your eyes.

“I'm gonna run up to my room and grab some more parchment. I’ll be down in a second,” You say, shrugging off your school robe as you turn to walk away. You ascend the stairs leading to your dorm, tossing your robe onto the sofa next to Mattheo as you do so.

Your robe slides off the sofa and hits the floor, a faint clinking sound echoing through the empty room as you disappear.

Curious, Mattheo looks down at your carelessly discarded robe. He reaches down, picking it up. It weighs heavier than it should be, and Mattheo can't help but feel a twinge of curiosity, He eyes the now empty staircase before reaching into your pocket, fingers brushing against a smooth glass vial.

Not just one, but a few.

Frowning, he turns out your pocket, and four identical glass vials tumble into his lap. Picking one up, his frown only deepens as he reads the label.

“Wideye potion?” He mutters to himself, the confusion on his face morphing into something else as the pieces fit in place.

He had admired you for your intelligence and drive, and now he was confronted with the reality of your struggles. The contrast between your achievements and the seemingly carefree moments he sought with you becomes stark. He berates himself for not having noticed early, for having let you fall down such a destructive path.

Jaw clenched, he gazes at the piles of books you had been working through, rolling the empty vials between his fingers as the sound of your approaching footsteps snaps him out of his thoughts.

You pause in confusion, noticing the scrutinising depression plastered on his face as he looks up at you, rolls of parchment bundled in your hands.

"What's the Wideye potion for?" Mattheo questions, his voice cutting through the silence with an uncomfortable heaviness. He holds up the empty vials as evidence, his gaze piercing through the exhaustion in your eyes.

Caught off guard by the confrontation, you glance down at the vials and then meet Mattheo's eyes. A brief moment of silence hangs in the air, the crackling embers of the fireplace filling the empty silence.

“Research. For uh, potions.” You respond, internally berating yourself for coming up with such a weak excuse.

Mattheo's expression remains stern, a mix of frustration and genuine concern etched on his face.

"Don't bullshit me," he says, his tone direct and uncompromising. "I found these in your pocket, and 'potions research' is a shit excuse. I’m going to ask you again. What’s the wideye potion for?"

You shift uncomfortably, feeling small under his scrutinising gaze You clear your throat, speaking.

"It's just to stay awake, you know? To keep going. I only take it in extreme circumstances" you explain, your voice betraying the exhaustion that has settled in.

Mattheos jaw clenches, his tongue poking the inside of his cheek as he looks to the side with a sigh, visibly frustrated.

“Extreme? And what would that be, hmm? Because right now I'm looking at four empty bottles, and God knows how many more you’ve thrown away.” He snaps, his expression softening as he looks at you.

You feel a lump forming in your throat as you struggle to find the right words. Why on earth were you close to tears? Why did you feel like crying?

“I-” You start, trailing off as you stare at the floor.

Mattheo cuts through the silence, his tone still stern but laced with concern. "This isn't okay. You're smart, and you know better. You can't keep doing this to yourself. What if something happens? What if you collapse or get seriously sick? It's not worth it."

After a moment, Mattheo's expression softens, and he exhales deeply. "When was the last time you ate?" he asks, the concern evident in his voice.

Shit.

You pause, hesitating before admitting quietly, "Breakfast...yesterday."

Mattheo's features tighten at your admission, his eyes reflecting a mixture of frustration, anger, and genuine worry. He rises from his seat and strides towards you, his footsteps echoing in the otherwise silent room.

"Yesterday? Are you serious?" he says sharply, his voice carrying a weight of both concern and disbelief.

You remain silent, unable to meet his eyes, feeling the shame and vulnerability washing over you.

“Seriously? Fuck, what’s wrong with you? Why would you do that to yourself?” He chastises you, and you snap.

“I have to! You don't fucking get it, do you? I don't have anything else to fall back on.” You start, dropping the parchment onto the table in front of you.

Mattheo's expression shifts from concern to confusion as you lash out. "What are you talking about? You have plenty more than just academics. You're talented, you're smart, and people care about you. Why are you reducing yourself to just grades?"

You scoff, a bitter smile playing on your lips. "Talented? Smart? What does that even mean? It's just a facade, a cover-up for the fact that without these achievements, I'm nothing. I don't have friends; I don't have hobbies or interests. What am I without my grades?"

Mattheo tries to interject, "You're a person with-"

But you cut him off, "No, you don't get it! I'm just a number, a ranking, a test score. Everything I am is tied to how well I perform academically. Do you know what it's like to feel like the only thing you're good at is studying, and even that's slipping away?" You snap anger evident in your tone as you spin around to face him, your weary eyes meeting his.

“It’s the same thing every single day. I wake up, bury myself in books, and push myself to the brink just to feel like I matter. I don't eat, I don't sleep, I don't talk to anyone. I’ve spent my whole life isolating myself and neglecting my most basic needs for this! If I stop now, then what's left of me?”

Tears start to well up in your eyes, and you hate yourself for showing such vulnerability. Mattheo's stern demeanour softens as he watches you unravel.

"I can't stop, Mattheo. I can't afford to. Because if I do, what's left of me?" Your voice trembles.

Mattheo's heart drops at your words, guilt and hurt clawing at his insides. He can’t fathom the idea of you suffering so much, and him being blind to it. How could you not notice how incredible of a person you are beyond all of this? He’d give anything in the world for you to see yourself through his eyes. For you to feel the way he feels when he's with you, even for a second. To know that he’d do anything you asked him to because he cared for you. Not the one who gets outstanding on all their tests.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Mattheo finally speaks, his voice softer, genuine concern written across his face.

You shake your head, a mix of frustration and desperation in your eyes. “Because you wouldn’t understand. No one does. They just see the grades, the perfect student. They don’t see the mess behind it all. And I can’t let them. I can’t let anyone see me like this.”

Mattheo moves closer, his expression shifting. “You’re wrong. I do understand. Maybe not completely, but I want to. You don’t have to face this alone.”

You scoff, wiping away a tear. “Why? What do you care? You have everything, popularity, friends, a life. I’m just the study partner, the smart one. I can’t burden you with this.”

Mattheo remains silent for a second, before he speaks.

“Every other Sunday, you go down to Hogsmesde and buy a hamper of sweets form Honeydukes. You take it to the children’s school and volunteer there for an hour. Everytime you visit, you make their day.” He starts.

"You're not just grades," he says, his voice gentle. "You have quirks that make you who you are. Like the way you absentmindedly tap your foot when you're deep in thought. Or how you always carry a small notebook, and I bet it's filled with more than just class notes. I've seen you doodle in the margins."

He continues, "You have a wicked sense of humor, even if you don't show it to everyone. I've heard you snort-laugh during our study sessions. And don't even get me started on your taste in music.How you call that dastardly jazz music, i’ll never understand, but you can’t resist humming along to the tunes of the Wizarding Wireless Network when you're studying. Your fondness for Chocolate Frogs and your inexplicable aversion to pumpkin juice.”

Mattheo's eyes light up, a small smile tugging at his lips as he recalls more details. "Remember that time in Charms class when you made your quill dance across the room just to see if you could do it? Or when you brewed a prank potion that turned the water in the Prefects' bathroom blue for a week? You have a mischievous side that not many people get to see." He continues, looking down at you sincerely. He remains silent for a second, eyes scanning over your face before he steps back, sighing.

“I don’t know how to do this emotional, sappy bullshit. I don’t do it. But with you, I do. I want to. Other people want to. That’s what you do.” He says, voice quiet.

You remain rooted to your spot, somewhere between disbelief and gratitude as you stare up at Mattheo. How did he know all that? Why did he know all that?

“You noticed?” You speak up, voice alarmingly quiet.

He looks at you as though you’ve just asked him whether the sky is blue.

“Of course i’ve noticed. It’s impossible not to.” He murmurs, and you know he’s being honest.

Tears prick in your eyes again, and it’s as though all that exhaustion and neglect has come crashing back down on you tenfold after Mattheo had called you out. You try blink them away but alas, you simply couldn’t. Before you can even say anything, Mattheo steps forward, pulling you into his chest as he wraps his arms around you in a tight embrace. He holds you tightly, not even entertaining the thought of letting go as your tears soak his sweatshirt, tentatively accepting his embrace. His heart clenches at every tear that falls from your eyes, and he can’t tell if he’s horrified or accepting of the fact that he’d give up everything to relieve you of your burdens, even if only for a day.

He rubs your back soothingly, and you can’t help but let it all out.

It’s rather cathartic, really, because you've held onto this weight for so long, and now, in Mattheo's arms, it feels like a moment of release.

As your tears eventually subside, you pull back, both embarrassed and utterly shattered. You look down, sniffling as you wipe away your tear stained eyes when Mattheo hooks a finger under your chin, tilting your head up to look at him.

People often said that the eyes were a window to the soul. You never really understood that, but in this moment, you felt as though you were gazing into the very depths of Mattheos being.

With a tenderness that betrays the boundaries of ‘just friends’ , he wipes away your tears with his thumb, looking down at you.

“Come on. Let’s get you up to rest, yeah?” He hums, quietly. You nod, having to tear yourself away from his touch.

He leans down to pack away your stuff, not letting you handle a thing as he throws your stuff over his shoulder.

“You can stay in my room, if you’d like. Theodore’s out for the night so I can take his bed.” Mattheo says.

You consider it for a second. You didn’t particularly fancy heading up to your room with Mattheo, for fear of your roommate awakening to see you in such a state. You nod, speaking.

“Yes please.” You say, voice embarrassingly hoarse from having cried so much. You pray Mattheo didn’t notice.

Of course he did. But, he chose not to draw attention to it, instead resolving to run down to the kitchen to get you a cup of tea.

You follow Mattheo into his room, which you were no stranger to. Having projects together meant endless hours of collaborating, and opting to avoid being pestered by your roommate and her friends (who had a rather amusing infatuation with Mattheo), you worked in his room instead.

“Help yourself to some clothes if you’d like. They’re on the right.” He says, carefully draping your school bag and robe onto one of the desks. You thank him, smiling softly as he cleans the mess he had left.

“Go lie down. I’ll be back in a second” He says, turning away as he exits his room. Swiftly walking down to the kitchen, his head is reeling with thoughts of you.

He chose not to confront the feeling gnawing at him in light of your breakdown. He didn’t want to deal with that just yet. In no less than 10 minutes he’s carefully treading up the stairs to the dorms once more, a cup of chamomile tea in one hand and some small crackers in the other.

You hadn’t been eating, nor drinking, and the idea of you neglecting yourself so much sent Mattheo into an uncomfortable state where he found himself riddled with anxiety.

Just friends, right?

He clicks open the door to his room with his elbow, precariously walking over with the tea and crackers in hand as he goes to set them down on his bedside table. His eyes flicker over to you, and a small smile tugs at his lips as he sees you already fast asleep, curled up under the covers. The sight of your slumber brings a warmth to Mattheo's heart. He watches you for a moment, taking in the soft rise and fall of your breath, the delicate features that are usually tense with stress now softened in sleep.

The sight brings him more peace than he wishes to admit, and the looming reality that he had to eventually confront only pressed down on him further.

But for now, he didn’t care.

Because in your peace, he found happiness. And he’s sure he’d never find anything else more beautiful.

Possessed by a wave of sentiment that betrays his usual self, he can’t resist reaching out to tuck a stand of misplaced hair behind your ear. Before he can even comprehend what he’s doing, he leans down and presses a soft , brief kiss to your forehead.

He pulls back and finds himself slightly taken aback by his own actions. The quiet room, filled only with the soft sounds of your sleep, almost seems to amplify the beating of his heart.

Mattheo stands there for a moment, looking at you with a mix of tenderness and confusion. Then, shaking off the unexpected surge of emotions, he retreats to Theodores bed , slipping out of his clothes as he goes to lay down. He had to resist the urge to turn around and catch a glimpse of you once again, and lets out a small sigh as he shuts his eyes.

Mattheo Riddle was not a man of sentiment. He was not soft, and he most certainly did not go out of his way for others.

You had changed that. And he couldn’t figure out whether the prospect was one he was ready to welcome.

[cassiopeiasdaughter]

midnight rain

Theodore Nott x fem!reader

part of the midnights collection

December 5th, 1998

Dear Diary,

I feel exhausted. I thought it would be over by now. I don’t think any of us ever expected this to go on for so long.

It started in the summer of ‘97 and 1999 is right around the corner. No, maybe not in 1997; it started many years ago, before I was born, before most people in this house were born. It must end soon and right this time. For good.

No more hatred, violence. We can’t let that happen again. I refuse to live in a world like that.

Last week was a nightmare. We were sent to Little Hangleton; a small village where the first Horcrux was created. We didn't find much, I remember Draco complaining about how wasteful the trip was and Hermione shouting at him; I found it funny at first, it brought me back to school but it was different this time.

Now they don’t actually hate eachother and I am sure that if something were to happen, they’d run to help eachother without hesitation. I was so lost in thought, daydreaming about our future; how everything will look like if we make it… and I guess that is why I didn't hear them.

Death Eaters, werewolves, everywhere. They were waiting for us, and they were so many. We were surrounded and had no other choice but to fight.

I was too busy fending off two Death Eaters and I didn’t see Greyback running towards me all bloody and terrifying.

Once I realized what was happening I stood frozen, I physically couldn’t move, I kept begging myself to do something, fight- run- scream- anything. He knocked me down and pushed my body to the ground with his claws. The blood on him was fresh and it got all over me. I couldn’t help but play it in my mind; how he killed the person whose blood was now on me. How he would soon kill me.

I can still feel his weight on my chest, when I am about to sleep, I can feel his breath on my neck and his claws on my shoulder.

I could have been bit, he could have killed me right then, just like he has done to so many people. But, Nott Theo was there and he cast a spell on him, causing him to fly away from me.

Hermione ran to me and we teleported back here. I couldn't speak and Theo kept shouting "Did he bite you?", "Is it your blood?", I just shook my head and locked myself in the shower, scrubbing my skin clean, getting rid of all the blood; of every feeling tied to that place.

I remember now the way the others looked at me, with pity, as if I had lost my mind.

I feel too weak for this war sometimes, like I am not made for something like this, I am not like Ginny or Harry. I am not like Hermione who kept her calm and willed herself to fight.

No one stopped when danger came, they weren’t scared and even if they were; survival kicked in.

The storm outside your window had been slowly calming you down. If you close your eyes you can pretend you are in your bed at Hogwarts, curled up in blankets and listening to the rain tapping on your window. Scottish winters were your favorites, storms always brought a sense of comfort to you, and rain lulled you to sleep.

Now, the crack of thunder scares you so much that the pen flies out of your hand landing somewhere on the desk and you stumble out of your chair, jumping backwards. You need to run, but in which direction? You feel the threat of tears forming in your eyes, but you know that if you let yourself fall down that hole, it won’t be easy to dig yourself out of it.

You look around in despair, begging your mind to find anything to distract yourself and that is when you hear a soft knock on your door.

Before you answer the door you make sure to wipe your tears and fix your hair; to try and look normal. But what is normal now anyways?

You find Hermione with a sympathetic smile; you know that smile. It is a smile she reserves for her friends, when they need help, comfort. You never were on the receiving end of it, it was always Harry or Ginny, sometimes Ron. You hate that now it is your turn to be pitied, taken care of. It feels strange and it makes you uneasy. 

“I brought you soup.” She says with a clam voice and steps inside.

You quickly walk over your desk with her, but close your diary before she can read what you’ve written.

“You didn’t come down to eat, so I figured you’ll be hungry.”, she places the bowl on your desk, by your things and turns to look at you.

You desperately try to avoid her gaze, not wanting to seem more wounded than you are, “Ah- yeah thank you.”, you lie staring at your hands.

She casts a Muffliato, blocking anyone outside the room from listening, before she begins to tell you news from the boys. 

“They managed to destroy two of them, they don’t want us to know more, but they might be heading to Hogwarts soon.”

“Hogwarts? Why?” You ask surprised 

“Uh- Harry is sure there are Horcruxes there. Moody hasn’t allowed it yet, but they will go. I know it.”, 

You nod silently, two Horcruxes down, how many more to go? It took you almost two years for two of them, who knows when the rest will be destroyed. And even if you manage to get rid of them all, how can you be so sure Voldemort will lose? Even without the Horcruxes, he has a whole army, full of deadly wizards and witches to protect him. It would take one order for the werewolves to attack you and kill you.

Tears begin forming in your eyes again; the more you think about the War the more hopeless everything feels. You can’t let Hermione see you ruined; Hermione who has been your closest friend all these years, the one that has managed to stay strong and not back down. You know what she did to her parents, instead of running with them she stayed. She bears the most danger but she still hasn’t lost hope; she continues fighting. No, you can’t let her see you break down, you owe her that. 

You look around the room to avoid her gaze once again when your eyes land on a brown coat, discarded on a chair, in the corner of the room. It is the coat Theo gave you that night on the porch, you still haven’t given it back. What better time to do that than now, when you so desperately need to avoid Hermione before you drop to your knees and cry in front of her.

Immediately, you run and grab the coat and turn to Hermione with an apologetic look on your face “I am so sorry, I need to give Nott this, before I forget it. He let me borrow it a few weeks ago.”, you say and take fast strides towards the door, while also guiding/kicking her out of your room. 

Once you are both out you head towards his room while also shouting behind your shoulder “I love you, we’ll talk later.”

While clutching the wool on your hands to ground you, you stop outside Theos room. You remember the time, it must be a few minutes past midnight by now, and the rain hasn’t calmed one bit, lightning lights up the cold corridor through the windows.

You knock a few times, telling yourself that if he doesn’t answer you’ll leave and smoke another of Lunas cigarettes to ease your mind. Maybe you’ll try one of the cookies she’s been begging you to taste…

The door opens as you begin to curse yourself for causing this much trouble in just one night, and a sleepy red-eyed Theo stands in front of you confused.

You force an apologetic smile and hold out his coat in front of him “Sorry for waking you up, I wanted to return this.”

He takes it off of your hands “Ah- it’s ok, thank you.”

He doesn’t make a move to close the door and head inside his room, and you don’t turn around to leave. You both stare at eachother silently and wait for the other person to do something.

The sound of thunder scares you both and as you jump a little he grabs your arm as if preventing you from falling.

“It’s really loud tonight, isn’t it? And it has been going on for ages.”, he says awkwardly

“Yes. I hate it.”, you say and look around nervously

“You uh- want to come inside?”

“Don’t you want to go back to sleeping?”, you ask him

“I- no I wasn’t sleeping, I can’t”,he replies awkwardly

So you nod and step inside. The room is dark and messy. The curtains are drawn over the windows, shielding him from the outside world and the only thing lighting the space is the old lamp by his bed.

It feels cold, just like the Slytherin Common Room, in the depths of the Great Lake. As your eyes move towards his bed you spot old photos of him and his housemates, no not just any housemates, his friends and Blaise.

You look into his face again and observe how his cheeks are glistening, his eyes aren’t red because he is tired, he was crying. 

He quickly cleans up the bed and throws a couple of pillows on the floor to sit there. He looks at you expectantly and gives you a boyish smile which you return as you sit opposite to him, crossing your legs and resting your hands on your knees, while he leans his back on the bed.

A few minutes of silence pass, crucial for both of you to adjust to this new situation. Alone, in a dark bedroom, obviously seeking comfort and solace in eachother, and also needing a space to hide from the outside world.

“Than-” “Are you-?” You say at the same time and then let out an awkward laugh.

“You first.”, Theo says

“Thank you for Little Hangleton, I haven’t seen you since then. I owe you.”

He scratches the back of his head as he remembers the battle, Greyback, your look afterwards.

“How are you, after that- after everything?” A sincere question that stabs your insides slowly.

“I” you laugh awkwardly “I am fine, others have had it worse” your best friend was killed in front of you you want to say, but instead settle for an “I will be fine.”

“Tsk” he mutters “Don’t do that, don’t act like it was nothing, I was there.”

“Well, we are fighting in a war, we know things like that are prone to happen.”

“You can never prepared when they happen to you.”, you know he is right but you can’t let yourself accept it.

“But nothing happened, he didn’t do anything to me. You knocked him off me before he-”, you can’t say the words and need a minute to take a breath.

“I know”, he says 

“I am safe.” you say with a loud voice and the threat of tears in your eyes

“I know” he says again with a calm voice, his eyes never leaving yours.

His gentleness is what causes you to break. And it is because behaviors like his don’t belong in these times. His voice; filled with the promise of safety and warmth is what you crave most; and the second you realize it is nothing but an illusion, a daydream, you break down.

You can feel a door, inside your chest bursting open and letting out all the feelings you’ve been keeping to yourself. Anger, sadness, hopelessness; they are all out in the open- making you vulnerable to him. You shut your eyes, not wanting to see the pity on his face, or worse; you’re afraid he now sees you for who you are, a fragile little girl, pretending to be strong and brave.

You are unable to say anything to him, so you wait for him to leave you alone and then pretend this never happened. He doesn’t do anything for the first few seconds, but then you are in his arms and your face is buried in his chest.

He remains silent, not wanting to lie and say “its alright” or “I know how you feel”. He just remains silent and waits for you to let it all out. And that is enough.

By the time you’ve run out of tears the storm has also stopped, leaving you with the soft sound of light rain. 

The realization then, of where you are and who you are with stains your cheeks red and makes your body hot. You slowly raise yourself from Theos chest and before you cry out of embarrassment you say “I am so sorry. I shouldn’t have done that, you shouldn't have seen that.”, with a self-deprecating tone

He gives you a reassuring smile, “It’s alright, you dont have to keep everything inside, you shouldn’t.”

You almost believe him, you want to, but then you see the mess your tears made on his shirt and out of instinct you hide your face in your hands. “Oh Godric, it’s embarrassing.”

He laughs and gently pulls your hands from your eyes, “You aren’t the only one losing her mind over the War.”, he jokes and you laugh, but then he continues with a serious voice

“Every time I sleep, I dream of Blaise, dying, and I can’t help him. Ever. And on the nights I am not able to sleep I can hear those who scream as they wake up, on the other die of the walls.”

“You don’t have to carry it alone, whatever it is.”, he finishes

You fight the urge to cry and softly say“Thank you.” Without thinking you place your hand in his “Then, you dont have to carry it alone either, you can talk to me, whenever you want.”, but suddenly, you feel as if you’re overstepping or getting too close so you pull back and say “If you haven’t already talked to the others, of course.”

He gives you a nod and you can see how his movements have slowed down and his eyes are glassy.

“I am sorry for staying so long, I’ll leave you alone, you must be tired.” You say as you stand up “Thank you again and if you ever need my help, I am a corridor away.”

“Thank you”

“Goodnight.”, you say with a smile and he answers back “Goodnight.”

Returning to your room, you feel as if a weight has been lifted off your chest. Of course, the weight will appear again in the future, but now you know how to get rid of it. You promise yourself to talk to Hermione in the morning. Let her in, and ask her how she is doing.

Under her strong exterior there may be hiding a scared and tired girl too. She must need someone to talk to, you owe her to be that person. Because, you love her and because she is the closest thing you have to a home now. 

You see your diary and remember you never finished what you were writing, you think you want to write about Theo, but whatever it is that happened just then, whatever you are starting to feel right now, is too new. It is so new and fragile that you can’t even write about it in your diary.

It will be alright. I may not be strong right now, I may be scared and breakable but I know that it can be fixed. I just need to focus on the good, whatever is left of it now. I need to focus on the missions and on winning. The faster we win, the sooner I can be okay again. 

It is just another storm, and after the storm rainbows come out.

Thank you for being here for me.

Yours,

But as you begin to write down your name you hear a soft knock on the door. It must be Hermione, you think and prepare yourself for the talk you ought to have and the many apologies you owe her for avoiding her like that.

On the other side of the door however, stands a flushed Theo, wearing his Slytherin sweatshirt and holding his pillow to his chest. “Can I sleep here tonight? I don’t want to be alone.”, he whispers self-consciously and you can’t do anything but let him in.

eat your apples because your future doctors are over here posting self insert fics instead of studying immunology 🤪🤠

this will be continued

also: feedback & criticism are very much appreciated & needed

[patrophthia]

mini skirt | theodore nott

pairing: theodore nott x reader

wc: 3.5k

genre: smut (minors DNI), fluff, best friends to lovers, meddling blaise zabini just coz, they’re in love 🤢🤢, self indulgent im so sorry for the person i am

smut tags: dry humping, coming untouched, (very little) oral sex, come eating, unprotected sex (don’t do this!!), fingering, size kink, breeding kink, bulge kink, cream pie, so much dirty talk oml, big dick theo 😞, reader being shorter than theo, reader wearing a mini skirt, lots of cussing

summary: blaise zabini’s idea of how to play matchmaker might be different from the traditional way of doing it but at least you ended up getting dicked down, so you guess his method works too.

Blaise Zabini's idea of playing match maker is whispering to you —in a not so quiet way, that he'd heard 'Nott's got a big dick' and though you swatted him away. Face disgruntled, mumbling about how you did not want to know about your best friend's private parts. You're terrible enough of a person for your eyes to drop to his crotch when he sat down on the couch opposing yours.

There's a call of your name, once, twice. Before Theodore leaned forward, his voice loud enough for your eyes to tear itself from his thighs to his eyes. You gulped, hoping —hoping that he thought you'd blanked out and just happened to be staring at a very unfortunate spot. "Hmm?"

Theodore's held onto your gaze, lazying back onto his coach. "You okay? I asked if you wanted to head back up but you didn't answer."

"Head back up?" You repeated. "Head where?"

He eyes you suspiciously. "To your dorm?" Theodore gets up from his seat and leans down to crouch beneath you, staring up at you. "Or mine?"

You blink. Mind running in all kind of ideas —save for the ones you knew he meant when he asked you this question. You shift slightly in your side, scanning the Slytherin's common room as the party rage on; it's nothing too big, a get together between all seventh year supplied with alcohol —that Draco definitely did not buy just to impress the golden boy, not at all.

"I'm pretty sure I saw Draco take Harry up to your dorm, and neither of them look like they're exhibitionists." You say off handedly, looking down at him. "Besides, I'm actually enjoying myself here."

And to prove yourself, you get up from your seat; pulling your mini skirt low enough to cover your ass. Theodore, despite having every chance to peer underneath it, remains respectful as he plays with the hem of your skirt. "You are?"

"You aren't?" You ask back, trying not to squirm from the way his finger brushes against your thigh. Salazar this was your best friend for shit's sake, knowing that he could hypothetically have a big dick should not turn you on as much as it was.

Theodore shakes his head, slowly, almost as if he was in a haze as he quietly tells you. "Not really."

"Let's head up then," you tell him, and though both of your voices are low —barely even audible considering how loud Mattheo decided to play his music. Theodore was able to understand you perfectly, picking himself up as he used your waist as his guide. "Come on."

His pinkie finger catches onto yours as he gets onto his feet, him towering over you the slightest bit. And though, Theodore and you leaving a party early to turn in for the night was a sight your friends were used to by now —knowing that nothing ever did came out of leaving the two of you alone to your own devices. Something about how Theodore was looking at you makes them think that that might just change tonight.

But, they regress and bid the two of you goodnight with a few sporting playful frowns on how you never stay with them until the party actually ends.

You only smile, leading Theodore up the stairs to your dorm like every other night. Once in the comfort of your room, you sit yourself down on your bed, patting the spot for besides you for Theodore to take. He did as told, melting into your touch as you brush his hair back. "How much did you drink?"

His eyes are shut, face leaning into the palm of your hand as his own grips onto your skirt, tugging you closer to him. "Just those two shots we took when we first went down."

You hum, letting him pull you to him. "Did you smoke?" Theodore shakes his head slightly, before opening his eyes back up at you. You laugh lightly. "Then what's up with you tonight? I'm always the one dragging us back."

"Just tired, I guess." He murmurs.

"You guess?" You ask him, standing up —letting his hands fall where it'd been trailing up your skirt back to his lap, lingering slightly on what sits above it. "When are you ever not tired?"

Theodore laughs at your words, eyes crinkling as he did so. "When I watch you play quidditch," he says, pushing himself up to press his back against the head of your bed. Watching as you shuffle towards your wardrobe, picking out a pair of sweats along with two shirts he'd left at your room. "Or when you're drunk out of your mind and I'd to have to play pretend as your boyfriend and take care of you."

You snort at his words, picking out a pair of shorts for yourself. "You don't have to pretend to be my boyfriend to take care of me."

"Mhmm," he hums from his spot, lounging lazily as you walk up to his side, the change of clothes in hand. "But it's more affective that way." His hand finds its way to your hips, pulling you closer to him. "And I like it. I like pretending to be yours."

There's a split second where his eyes falters, looking at you almost nervously as he waits for you to respond. "You do?"

"Mhmm," he hums, pushing himself up to sit straight. "More than anything."

It's nauseating to see him look at you —eyes lacking their usual stoic and disinterest to instead be replaced by lust and adoration.

Without thinking twice, you leaned down meeting his lips halfway as your eyes flutters shut. And though seated, Theodore was still tall enough to kiss you back with ease. Letting you melt into the feeling of his soft lips moving slowly and desperately against yours.

"Fuck," Theodore mutters breathlessly, he pushes against your hand; dropping your (mostly his) clothes to the floor. "You have no idea how long I've wanted to do that."

"What?" You giggle, letting him pull you onto his lap. "Kiss me?"

"To kiss you again," He murmurs, attaching his lips back onto yours; a soft whimper slipping out of his lips when his clothed cock brushes against your core through his swift movements.

Fuck, Blaise was not lying.

In between your legs, underneath beige slacks, Theo's giant cock ruts up to you. You gasp into his mouth. "Ah—" you try to catch your breath. "—fuck, Theo. You've been wanting to kiss me since we were thirteen?"

"Mhmm," he hums, long slender hands gripping onto your waist before he slides one underneath your shirt and lays it flat against your tummy. His free hand, resting on your thigh, guiding you down onto him. "You're the only girl I ever want to kiss."

It's silly, you know it is —especially when his cock was pressing into your cunt, only separated by a thin layer of clothing— and yet you can't help but smile up at him, almost giggling when you ask him. " 's that why you asked me to be your first kiss?"

"Mhmm." He's smiling when he kisses you. "Can you blame me?" His tongue licks at your top lips, quick and gentle, trying to gauge on what you tasted like. "Prettiest girl at Hogswart and she was willing to be my first kiss."

His hand moves grips onto your waist, his touch blazing hot. "... Flatterer," you say, a playful pout prominent on your lips.

He chuckles, pressing his lips back onto yours, hand moving from your thigh to tug at your shirt. When you nod, Theodore pulls away just enough for him to take your shirt off and toss it Salazar knows where.

He doesn't even try to hide his staring, canting his hips upwards as he held you down. "Can you feel that?" He asks breathlessly, almost whining as he humps against you. "Can you feel how hard you make me?"

You could only moan, nodding dumbly as you rolled your hips. "Fuck—" he says against your lips, "—how'd you get even prettier, baby?"

And despite how hot —how nauseating it is to feel his boner pressing onto your wet cunt, you can't help but giggle at his words, at how turned on he got just at the sight of your tits. "It's just boobs."

"It's your boobs." He hand goes up behind you, making quick work at the clasps before kissing your chest, licking at your nipples; his hips not halting in its movement. "So so pretty."

His hand slips down, going underneath your skirt to knees at you thigh. "Shirt—" you roll onto him, breathless each time you feel just how hard he was. "—shirt, Theo."

Though incoherent, Theodore still understood you enough to pull his shirt off of himself before attaching his lips back onto you. His tongue glides against yours, swallowing your moans up when he bucks particularly hard.

It’s humiliating how the simple act of humping, combined with Theo’s hand playing with your tits, pinching and rolling your nipple between his long fingers with his tongue exploring your mouth has you writhing on top of him.

"Theo, ah—" you whine, hands gripping onto his shoulders to steady yourself, a familiar warmth building in your stomach. "— wait, fuck!"

Theodore's hips coming to a halt, as he watch you cum on top of him —in awe, without him even having touched you. "Did you just… ?"

You whine, pressing your face against his bare shoulder to hide just how embarrass you were. Theodore pulls you back, looking at you with what you could only assume was love. "Did you just come, baby?"

You nod bashfully, hands going to cover your face just for him to pin both of them down. "So cute, so so pretty." He kisses you roughly, rutting up to you. "Gonna fuck you nice and full, how’s that sound?"

Theodore only frowns when you nod, always having been the talkative one in your relationship. “Words, baby. That sound good to you?”

“Ah!” Your panties stick to your cunt uncomfortably, feeling all too messy when he grinds his cock onto you. “Good,” you whine, “ ‘s good.”

Theodore smiles, pressing a quick kiss onto your lips as a reward. His hand trails down to your thighs, flipping your skirt up before groaning at the sight of his beige slacks soiled by your slick and cum. "Look at the mess you made, didn’t even have to touch you.”

Sliding your panties to the side, Theodore runs two fingers down your slit. "Even your cunt's pretty," he murmurs, bringing his finger up to his mouth to licks at your juices. "You taste even better."

You're pouting as you watch him play with your pussy, fingers pressed onto your clit, going back in for another taste before you finally move down his crotch, just enough for you to palm at his cock.

"Fuck—" he whimpers, hips bucking onto your hand.

Feeling proud you pulled such a reaction out of him, you reach for his belt, lifting yourself up off of him as he helps rid himself of his slacks. Pulling back his boxers, you will yourself not to drool over the sight of his long and thick cock, milky from the precum leaking from its tip.

Your hand moves on its own, wrapping around the base of his hard cock only to find that your hand was too small to wrap all the way around him. "Why didn't you tell me your dick was huge?."

"You want me to —fuck—" Theodore whines, cock twitching in your hand as it begged for you to move. "You want me to tell my best friend about the size of my cock?"

"Yeah?" You move your hands up, thumb running along his tip. "Biggest dick I've ever seen."

"You never told me you had —fuck, baby— never told me you had a perfect cunt either." Theodore moans, the sight in front of him feels like it came straight out of a porno. His best friend and her small hands playing with his cock, tits out with only her tiny skirt stopping him from fucking her into the mattress.

You giggle softly before leaning down to take him inside your mouth. "Fuck!" Theodore choked out, hips roughly thrusting into your mouth. He's too big for you to fit in entirely in your throat and he knows it. And he's too close to cumming in your mouth to keep you were you are.

His hand pulling your head up and away from his cock swiftly. His eyes are shut, head leaning back against your headboard as he breathes heavily.

Your eyes are teary when he opens his eyes back up, and he wills himself not to think about how it's the result of him fucking your face. Theodore brings you up to sit between his legs, kissing you desperately, groaning when he tastes himself on your lips.

Your hand goes back to grab at his length and he whines, pressing his face into your neck and squirms underneath your touch. "Wait, fuck—" his hand goes to stop you, brain going dead as you pumped his cock. "—fuck, fuck wait."

Theodore moves away from your touch, pressing your hand down onto your mattress as he heaves heavily. "Shit— Next time," he whines, "we can do all that next time," he murmurs against your neck, pulling his head away to look at you, he adds: "but I need to fuck you. Please, just let me fuck you. I'll do anything to feel your cunt and fill you up nice and full, please baby."

And when he pleads for you so nicely, who were you to deny him anything? He kisses you again, laying you down on your back, whispering soft thank you’s as he presses open mouth kisses down your body. Slender hands roaming around as he tries to map you out. It's only when Theodore flips your skirt up, ripping away your panties to give himself a full view of your throbbing pussy did you realize what he's about to do.

"Hey, I liked those!"

"I'll buy you more, baby." You're dripping in front of him and he think he might be losing his mind. "Need to eat you out first."

"Thought you wanted to fuck me," you whine, gasping softly when he slides his fingers over your pussy, "why can you play with —fuck."

You pout at him, not expecting him to slide his finger inside you while you talked. "Why can you— ah! —play with me when I can't play with you."

"Not playing baby, just stretching you out," he tells you with a soft smile, leaning over to kiss your pout away. "Not gonna fit unless we stretch you out."

" 's fine," you whimper, feeling him slip another finger in, fucking into you slowly. "it'll fit just fine."

"You sure?" He picks up his pace, long fingers reaching places your own never could. "Don't wanna hurt you."

" 's fine," you moan when he slips a third finger into your cunt, "don't care if it hurts, just wanna feel you."

Theodore pulls out, bringing his fingers to his lips to taste you once more. Moving back up, Theodore grabs at a pillow, placing it beneath your lower back to elevate your cunt. Slowly, he guides his dick into you, gasping at the feeling of his thick head stretching you open.

"Fuck—" Theodore pushes in deeper, pausing when he feels you clenching impossibly tight around him "—your cunt's sucking me in so good."

The burn is delicious, his cock tearing you open from within, stretching you out to take him into you. "So full," you whine, pressing your head into your sheets as he slides in even deeper into you. " 's too much."

"I know, baby," he murmurs, rubbing slow circles onto your thighs, "just a little more, I know you can take it."

You whine pathetically, feeling him fuck the last few inches snuggly into you. "Ah!" He hasn't even moved and you're already breathless, feeling him in your stomach. “Fuck me, Theo. Fuck me nice and full.”

“You want me to fuck your small cunt nice and full?” Theodore pulls out entirely, leaving just his tip in your cunt before roughly thrusting back in, hands on your hips as he pounds into you. "I’ll fuck it nice and full for you, maybe even put a baby in you."

And when your pussy grips his cock at his words, Theodore drives into you even harder. “Put a baby in me, please.”

“Yeah? You want that?” He watches as your tits bounce with each harsh thrust. “You want to carry my baby? Have your pretty tits grow bigger? You want that?”

“Yes,” you cry out, eyes screwed shut, the pain of his cock splitting you open mixing with pleasure. “Yes, ah— want it.”

“Fuck—” Having just about enough, Theodore pushes your mini skirt up your stomach giving him a full view of how well he's fucking his thick cock into you. The mound of your pussy bulging as it makes room for his dick to spear into your cunt.

"See that baby? See how good your cunt’s at taking my cock?" He asks, his hand grabbing yours to press down below your navel. "See how good I'm fucking you?"

You can only moan, crying out his name when he presses your hand down onto the bulge in your stomach, pushing his own dick out of your pussy. "Feel how deep my cock is inside of you?"

“Gonna be so easy for me to breed you,” he murmurs, wrapping your legs around his waist to fuck himself even deeper into you. “Want me to breed you, baby? Hmm?”

You nod desperately, too cock drunk to speak. Jolting when Theodore presses a harsh finger to your clit, circling it as he fucked deeper into you. "Theo, I'm gonna—"

"I know baby," he says, his cock getting impossibly harder inside of you. He presses another finger onto your clit, rubbing tight circles as you squirm underneath him. "Fuck— you're pussy's so good. Need you to come on my cock."

Theodore leans down to kiss you, pushing his length even deeper into you. You moan into his mouth, fucking you through your orgasm, your legs trembling as you try to squeeze him in.

Theodore fucks your cum back into you harder and faster, chasing his own high. One quick glance at his cock coated with your cum, followed by the bulge in your tummy was sends has him rutting into your tight cunt, spilling his warm seed inside you.

Theodore thrusts a few more time just to savor the sight of you spread on his cock before finally pulling out of you. "Fuck Theo," you whined, his cum leaking out of you, making a mess all over your bedsheet. "Were you just never going to tell me your dick is huge?"

Theodore only smiles bashfully, pressing a kiss onto your forehead. "We're still on this?"

"You expect me to not be on this?" You say with a slight pout, Theodore only half paying attention to you as he grabbed a random shirt from the floor to wipe at you thighs. "It's almost like you don't even think of me as you best friend."

"Pretty sure best friends don't go around telling each other about how big their dick is, baby," he replies.

"Blaise can know about your dick size but I can't?" You murmur. "Talk about double standards."

Theodore pauses his movements, hand hovering over your spent pussy. "That fucker."

"Hmm?" You're curious now, confused as to why he was suddenly cursing out your friend. Never having been one to use curse words unless —well, unless he's fucking you.

"He told me that you liked guys who begged," he says with a slight front, going back to cleaning you up nonetheless.

"Is that why you begged to fuck me?"

"No, that was all me," he answers truthfully, ears tinging red in embarrassment,"just wanted to fuck you."

"And they say romance is dead," you say playfully before your eye zeroes into what's in Theodore's hand. "What about the whole breeding thing? And ‘s that my shirt?"

Theodore, freezes with his hands between your thighs, feeling you stare him down as he did so. Slowly, he unravels the shirt he'd use to wipe you clean only to realize that yes, that is your shirt.

"You ripped up my panties, messed up my skirt, tried to put a baby in me, and used my shirt to wipe up your cum," you say, frowning, "I'm never having sex with you again."

Theodore's quick to apologize, peppering your face with kisses, mumbling sorry over and over again. "I'll sneak you out of Oxford street, take my black card with you, how's that sound?"

— from bee: this is my first time writing smut be nice to me 😡

[distantdarlings]

HESITATING // t. nott

RATING: R / 3.9K WORDS

Theodore Nott x Fem Reader Insert

+ SUMMARY - *Requested, based on this* After a trip to Hogsmeade, you realize that Theo seems to get an awful lot of attention from girls. To avoid getting hurt, you start to distance yourself from him to rid yourself of your crush. But Theo is not having it. (Smut)

+ WARNINGS - SMUT! No protection - piv, praise kink, slight body worship, biting (one time), fem reader, language, one time skip, dom!Theo (lmk if I missed any)

+ MUSIC (listened to while writing) -

more than friends - Isabel LaRosa

---

Your eyes found the clock on your bedside table. You were supposed to meet Theo in the Great Hall in ten minutes, yet you stood completely still in your dorm, switching back and forth between two outfits. It was a Saturday, and you didn’t have the usual crutch of your school uniform, hence the inability to decide. 

As the year progressed, the temperature dropped outside as well as within the castle. When chills were scattered across your arms in class, your teeth were almost clacking together. At the thought, a small shiver went through you.

You decided on a heavier sweater and jeans, noting that if you were cold in the warmth of your dorm, you’d likely be cold in the stone Great Hall. 

You slipped the outfit on, selecting a thick pair of socks and a ratty pair of shoes you’d had since fourth year. It wasn’t the most stunning style, but it was efficient and comfortable. Five minutes to go.

You slipped your wand into your back pocket and headed toward the hallway, slipping the dorm door closed behind you. Theo was likely already there with his group of friends, ones you liked to call friends, as well. The sons of big names around Hogwarts and the wizarding world, in general, though they were just boys to you. 

As you arrived at the grand doors of the Great Hall, the boys in question caught your eye and shot excited waves at you. While some of them had a bit more pride than others, they always seemed happy to see you. A smile broke across your face as you walked over to the Slytherin table, claiming the space between Theo and Mattheo. 

“Hello there, darling,” Theo purred in your ear when the group went back to their conversation. A twinge of heat flared in your chest. You hid a smile.

“Miss me?” You asked, voice low. He smiled. 

“Of course I did.” He threw a playful arm over your shoulder. Though it seemed to be a friendly gesture, it felt like a claim to you. A claim by him placed onto you, alerting all who you belonged to. It made you embarrassingly happy. 

“Any plans today, boys?” You asked. The group turned to you. 

“Actually, we were thinking of heading down to Hogsmeade for the day,” Mattheo said. “We were going to ask if you wanted to go with us?”

“I’d love to, as long as I’m not forcing myself on the group,” you said, only half-joking.

“Of course not,” said Enzo, a sweet smile on his face. “We love hanging out with you.”

“Yeah?” You teased. Mattheo rolled his eyes.

“You know we like you,” he joked, running a mean hand over your head, tousling your hair. You exclaimed and pushed his hand away, laughing along with the dark boy.

“We definitely do,” Theo laughed, pulling you tighter against him for a moment. 

“Well, alright,” You laughed. “Heading there now?”

“Yes!” Enzo clapped his hands together and stood, already headed toward the door. The rest of you laughed and made to follow him. 

“What about jackets? It’s cold out there!” You exclaimed, rubbing your hands over your arms.

“Ah, I’ve prepared for that,” Theo said, picking up two jackets that had been placed beside where he’d once sat. You hadn’t noticed them originally. 

He selected the smaller brown one and slipped it over your shoulder while he pushed his arms through the black one.

“Theo!” You exclaimed, running your hands over the nice corduroy material. “Where on earth did you get this? Whose is this?” 

“Yours, of course,” he laughed as the four of you exited the castle and headed down the cobblestone path to Hogsmeade.

“What do you mean?” You asked.

“Call it an early Christmas gift,” he said, smiling smugly. 

“You can’t be serious!”

“Of course I am,” he said, rolling his eyes. “I saw it in one of the shops last weekend and thought of you.” 

If you weren’t the wiser, you’d have thought your heart had melted and poured down through your rib cage. A blush filled your cheeks and your stomach at the thought of Theo thinking of you and then buying something. 

“Thank you, Theo,” you sighed. He laughed and shrugged it off as if he hadn’t just made your whole week, if not your whole decade. 

The whole way down to Hogsmeade, your heart refused to let go of your brain. The pink filter that had been placed before your eyes glowed brightly. This little crush of yours seemed to have elevated a bit, but you’d never admit that, of course.

The group stopped before the Three Broomsticks, eager to slip into the cozy building’s warmth and order several rounds of Butterbeer. 

The four of you pushed through the door and selected a round booth near one of the back windows. Enzo and Mattheo headed to the front counter to order for the group. 

“Have you got any plans for the rest of the day?” Theo asked, naturally sliding his arm around the back of the booth behind you. 

“Well, if you’ll have me, I’d love to stick with the three of you,” you suggested.

“I was hoping you’d say that,” he smiled, playfully tugging on a piece of your hair. He was hoping you’d say that? 

“Here we are!” Enzo cheered, placing two pints of Butterbeer on the table before the two of you. Mattheo was close behind him, carrying two for the both of them. They slid into the booth beside Theo, with you and Mattheo on the ends and Theo and Enzo between you. It felt comfortable.

Between each of your smiles, all with different personalities, you’d found a very safe space to stay. Every moment with these people made up a memory you knew you’d remember until you could no longer. Nothing could have ruined this evening.

“Oh, my God!” A loud voice said, drawing the syllables out. The four of you turned to look at the unfamiliar face standing before your table. “Teddy? Is that you?”

“Teddy?” You asked, wrinkling your nose at the nickname. 

“Holy shit. Laverna!” Theo laughed. “How long has it been?” 

“A while! I’ve just been visiting recently and thought I’d stop by Hogsmeade after not having seen it for so long.” 

The girl standing before your table was incredibly gorgeous, with flowing platinum hair that reached the bottom of her spine and shocking blue eyes. Her skin appeared flawless and luminescent beneath the comforting lights within the restaurant. A fire of jealousy broiled in your chest. 

“Guys, this is Laverna,” Theo introduced her. “We were pretty close before her family moved to France, and she transferred to Beauxbatons.” 

“That’s me!” she giggled. It sounded like she even had a hint of a French accent. You struggled not to roll your eyes. 

“I was just going to get a drink. Do you want to catch up a bit?” she asked.

Theo ushered Mattheo and Enzo out of the booth. A bit confused, they got to their feet and allowed the boy next to them to slide out and give a hug to the beautiful woman. You sipped your Butterbeer. 

The other two boys sat back down and glanced up at you in scattered patterns. You ignored their eyes. You were pretty sure they knew about your little crush. Scratch that. They definitely knew. 

Over your shoulder, you could hear the two of them laughing and carrying on. You attempted to ignore the burning in your cheeks. Mattheo and Enzo nursed their drinks, fidgeting randomly. 

A few moments of randomized chatting passed before Theo finally came back, a poignant smile still painted over his lips. You looked away from him. 

“Sorry about that,” he laughed, scooting in next to Mattheo. You tried not to think about the fact that he didn’t sit next to you. You were being dramatic. 

“Alright, where to next?” He asked. The four of you discussed what to do with the rest of your day with random store names circling about. The final agreement was to head over to Honeydukes to enjoy some of their Christmas sales, and so Enzo could stock the small jar that sat beneath his bed. He tended to snack throughout the night as he was tending to assignments, refusing sleep. 

You gathered together and made your way through the small town, window-shopping here and there. Every time you pouted over Theo’s seemingly obvious interest in the gorgeous girl, you remembered the jacket currently around you. Theo cared about you. Was it the way you wanted him to? You weren’t sure. 

Once inside the colorful store, the four of you split and wandered your separate ways, each looking for different sweets. You always headed right toward the chocolate frogs, eager to extend your vast collection of cards. Perhaps it was a bit childish, but who cared? It was a fun hobby. 

You stopped before the rack piled high with the blue boxes and stared. You tried to guess which one would have a card you’d never gotten before, conjuring up every ounce of intuition you had.

With another second of thought, you chose the one sitting on the shelf directly in front of your face. You were excited to open it with Theo; he always loved to see you add to your collection. 

You turned the box over in your hands, examining the packaging. Out of the corner of your eye, a flash of red caught your attention. You turn to the left and notice Theo laughing aloud, talking with that same girl, Laverna, and another girl. A dark-haired goddess with blushed cheeks and a perfect figure. Fuck’s sake. 

The urge to crush the chocolate box in your hand flashed through your mind. You rolled your eyes and headed further into the store, trying to put distance between the two of you.

Mattheo was standing against a wall, browsing a rack of magazines, occasionally picking one to flip through. You stopped before him, leaning up against the same wall. 

“Pouting, are you?” He asks, not looking up from the magazine in his hands. You scoff.

“No, I’m not…I’m just…,” you sigh and close your eyes.

“Just in love?” He asked, glancing up at you with a smirk. 

“Fuck off,” you groaned. Was it that obvious? Maybe it was. You didn’t know. An exhausted sigh left your lips.

Uproarious laughter sounded from the corner. You recognized one of the laughs as Theo’s. The others belonged to women. That was it.

“Okay, I’m heading back to the castle,” you said, throwing your hands up. “Tell Theo I wasn’t feeling well or something.”

“What? Are you sure?” Mattheo asked, finally dropping the magazine. “We still want you here with us.” 

“It’s okay, I’m just tired,” you said. “I think I’ll just head back for a nap until dinner.” And with that, you paid for your candy and headed back to the castle. 

xxx 

Over the next week, you made an unintentional decision to skip meals with the group. You weren’t trying to avoid them—or maybe you were—but you found yourself wanting to be alone more and more the past few days. 

The thought of having to see Theo after Saturday, when he had the attention of half the girls in Hogsmeade, made you want to vomit. Perhaps it was jealousy pushing you away, but it was your anxiety keeping you there. Every time you thought of heading back to eat with the group, you reminded yourself that Theo hadn’t tried to reach out since you’d stopped seeing them. If he wanted to, he would, right?

With your decision to keep away from the boys for a while, you’d taken to eating in your dorm over your lunch break. Nobody else was ever in there, and it was kind of comfortable, to be honest. You would nibble on your meal and read, or draw, or whatever came to mind, and it was nice and quiet. 

You set your book on your bed and gathered the little meal you’d prepared for yourself. Pulling the covers back, you settled in and grabbed your novel. This was absolutely lovely after a busy morning.

Just as you’d begun to settle yourself into the routine you’d started the previous week, two shouts of your name shot through the air. Before the disappointment and onset of anxiety came shock. Was that Theo?

Rapid steps grew closer and closer until the dormitory door echoed a gentle knock as if the person behind it had slowed down just as they’d arrived. 

“Um…who is it?” You asked awkwardly.

“Baby, it’s Theo,” a breathless voice came from behind the door. “Please open the door. Please. I need to talk to you.”

Baby? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? The shocked mantra rushed through your head as you shakily ripped your comforter away, ignoring your food and book. 

You slowly pulled the door open, seeing a nervous Theo. His eyes were shot with blushed red, and his lips were swollen. Had he been crying?

“Theo, what—?”

“Please, can I come in?” he asked. His breath exited his body in short, rough pants. You nodded wide-eyed and moved out of the way. He pushed into the room, walking to the center of the room. His hands pushed through his hair repeatedly.

You pushed the door closed and pushed the lock. When you turned, he did the same, eyes on yours. His eyebrows were furrowed together, desperation painted on his face. His lips were parted, his eyes wanting. 

“What is it—?”

“You have to tell me what I’ve done,” he begged. “I feel like I’m going crazy.”

“What do you mean?”

“You know what I mean! Where have you been? You’ve been gone for days; the boys say you’re mad at me, that you might not come back—what the fuck are they talking about?” he demands, his eyes wide. 

Your lips parted stupidly. No words came, no matter how hard you searched for them. The only thought that could process within your brain was how you were gonna kill Enzo and Mattheo for saying such stupid things to him. If anything, they were likely trying to get him to come and talk to you—which, it seems, has worked.

“Theo,” you cave, “it’s not that I wasn’t returning or mad at you…I was…” You could barely get the words out. He watched you with intent and pressure. It felt as though you were about to suffocate.

“What? Please tell me. What’s wrong?” He begged, his voice cracking. He moved toward you, his hands raising to touch you, then hesitating and dropping. A line of shimmering tears pool within his eyes, and the pure shock of seeing Theo about to cry had your lips parting again. 

“I was…,” you groan, “…jealous.” You practically whispered the last part.

“Wait, what?” He gasped, his eyes widening even further.

“Theo, please don’t make me repeat it,” you sighed, pressing your hands to your face. “I’m embarrassed as is, I was jealous of those girls from last Saturday. I felt like every time I saw you, you were making another girl laugh, and they were all fucking perfect, of course, and I-I like you so much, Theo—”

His hands pressed to either side of your face, his fingers tight and warm. His eyes were widened, his breaths heavy. 

“No more,” he breathed, “please, tell me to stop, and I will, but I have to…” 

His lips pressed roughly to yours, his breath more like pants. He kissed you like you were air, his lips desperate and biting. The sound he pressed against your mouth was like one of relief. You gasped against him, finally realizing where you truly were and what was happening. Your fingers tightened in his hair, begging him closer to you. 

“I n-need you,” he shivered against your lips, breath shuddering. You nodded fervently, barely having time to wrap your arms around his neck as his hands placed themselves around your thighs. He yanked you into the air and placed himself on your bed, settling you over his lap. The way he’d forced you to straddle him pressed his firming core against yours, sending a shock of excitement through your body. 

His fingers began to quickly work the buttons of your shirt apart. When the fabric was finally split down the middle, he pressed his mouth to the top of your breasts, mouthing hot kisses against the soft flesh there. You sighed softly, letting your head fall back to allow him all the necessary room. 

“Wanted you for so long,” he mumbles against you. Your fingers brush through his curled hair, gently scraping against his scalp every so often. The feeling of his lips against you made your heart race to the point of beating against his tongue. 

Much to your dismay, he pulled away and shoved you back. You fell against the foot of the bed, completely helpless as he climbed over you. The domineering air he carried with him spread over your body, rendering it pliant beneath his searing touch. 

His fingers gently cradled your hips as he worked his mouth over your stomach, dipping his tongue across every curve and dip, savoring the taste of sweat that slid down your skin. As his lips heated your skin, the shaking breaths he blew through his nose cooled it down and had you reeling. The ceiling above you was all but spinning. 

He followed the curve of your body all the way up to your mouth, allowing his tongue to learn every inch of your abdomen. When his lips found yours again, the both of you were panting. The only thing standing between the two of you was your uniforms.

With a burst of confidence thanks to his session of worship, you gently cradled him in your hands, applying slight pressure against his most sensitive area. At the touch, he choked against you, sucking in a rough breath.

“Please,” he moaned. “Let me fuck you. I'll do anything.” He whispered your name. Over and over and over. Begging and begging. 

“Anything?” You smirked, watching as his eyes seemed to well up with the same liquid. He nodded quickly.

“I want you to do whatever you want to me,” you whispered. And if it wasn’t like giving someone a million bucks. 

“Thank you,” he whispered, a wave of relief washing across his face. The obvious desire written across his face and actions had you feeling wanted and gorgeous. The confidence built by the second.

His fingers quickly found the hem of your skirt and pushed it up over your thighs. At the sight of the thin bottoms you had on, a slow moan pushed itself between his lips. “Fuck,” he whispered.

His thumb came down to slowly swipe down the center of your core through your bottoms. You jolted at the soft action, not prepared for it. A smile spread over his face.

He gently pushed the fabric to the side, reveling in the feeling of the white lace against his fingertips. Once he’d revealed you, an even louder moan escaped from him. Only a moment passed before he pressed two fingers to his lips, coating them with a thick layer of saliva. He pulled them from his lips and began to lather you in himself. 

Your lips parted in a breathy whine at the feeling. His fingers were gentle but direct, only brushing the most sensitive spots before slowly filling you up to the hilt of his fingers. 

“Fuck, you just opened right up for me,” he groaned. His words sent shocks of lightning through your stomach. His skilled fingers stretched you out perfectly, preparing you for what was to come. The want in his eyes was growing darker and darker, imagining the next few minutes. It was all too much; you couldn’t wait any longer.

“Please, Theo, just fuck me,” you whined, “no more.”

“Yeah, baby? I’m gonna fuck you, don’t worry about that,” he whispered. “‘ve been dreaming about this cunt for months.” He makes quick work of his trousers, roughly ripping the clinking belt from its loops. He separates the button and pushes them down, revealing the dark briefs that framed every muscular curve. 

He separated your legs and placed himself neatly between them. His hands reached down to agonizingly trace himself up and down your core. You moaned at the feeling, bucking your hips against his warmth. You attempted to salvage any of his warmth, begging for the feeling of him within you. 

When he finally pushed himself into you, there was no resistance. The sounds that left your mouth chorused each other, echoing across the dorm room. He gave only a few seconds for you to adjust before building his pace rapidly. The pure length of him hit everything within you with ease. This time, there were tears welling up in your eyes as he abused every inch of you. 

Sweet nothings left his mouth as he pushed roughly into you. His strong hips showed no weakness, and the hands that gripped you branded bruises against your flesh. Every second of this moment would visit you for years to come, promising you’d never find someone like Theo. He was the body made to fit perfectly against yours, with the intent to love and please and hold. And, fuck, if he wasn’t doing exactly that. 

As he worked you closer and closer to the end, he reached down and pulled you quickly against his chest. Out of habit, your arms wrapped around his neck. Despite the change in position, he never let up on his speed or brutality. The only thing you could feel was his strong hands bouncing you up and down him. His teeth pressed into your neck, piercing the soft flesh there. And that was what did it for you. 

You finished around him hard and heavy, your limbs becoming pathetically weak. As you came down from your high, you could barely keep your hold around him. His arms tightened around you, holding you up as he fucked himself into you, harder and harder, until he was coming, too. The feeling of his release pouring within you and every thrust he performed to push it back within you pulled you out for the final moment. 

Stars danced around your head as he finally set you back down against the bed, his touch so gentle in comparison to what he had done prior. The contrast of his touch against you as he pushed the wet hair clinging to your forehead was blinding. You sighed contently as he lay next to you, eyes watching you closely.

“I’m sorry I was so emotional,” he whispered. “I thought I was going to lose you forever…before I’d even had the chance to tell you what kind of feelings I was harboring.”

“What kind of feelings?” you whispered back, turning over to face him.

“That I’m completely in love with you and have been for a long time.” Your heart swelled at the confession. Quiet giggles spilled from your mouths at the realization of what he was saying.

“I’m in love with you too, Theo,” you laughed. “That’s why I was so jealous.”

“Because I’m so sexy?” he teased. You rolled your eyes and placed a playful smack on his arm.

The moments that followed were filled with quiet laughs and sweet kisses. And before either of you had noticed, you’d both drifted off against each other. Afternoon classes were a lost cause, as was the hope of meeting back up with Mattheo and Enzo for dinner, but neither of you minded. 

*Tag List: @lilymurphy03 (if you want to be added to the tag list for any future works, please send me a dm or message in my inbox, thanks!)*