#They’re dumb teenagers and they do dumb teen stuff i know it

[junosmindpalace]

teenage chuuya and dazai who accidentally developed quite a couple of inside jokes over the course of their partnership, and one day just have the most horrid case of giggles while on a mission.

the setting is all intense and they’re doing what double black usually does—dazai being the brains and chuuya mainly being the one kicking ass. but then something happens that triggers one of chuuya and dazai’s inside jokes in dazai’s mind and he slowly starts to lose it.

he whispers it to chuuya as they’re setting up their trap, who at first hisses at him to shut up and focus up, but then the joke processes in his mind and he involuntarily starts to smile and tremble.

dazai brings up the joke again in combat as he knocks out one of the men he’s fighting, close to hysterics over it even though it’s probably one of the most unfunny and nonsensical jokes they have. he’s hunched over and his body is shaking, and another enemy uses his moment of vulnerability to go and strike him from behind. chuuya quickly takes the enemy out. he screams at dazai to focus up yet again.

but the louder dazai’s laughter gets, the harder it is for chuuya to suppress his own. his face slowly starts to turn red, not from the physical activity, but from how fucking stupid the joke is and how that’s exactly why chuuya is on the verge of going ballistic over it like dazai.

they’re both out of breath by the time they finish fighting, a couple of new scars littered on their skin, bruises already forming on their knees from the particularly gruelling mission, and dazai brings up the joke one final time in a hushed voice, covered in grime and blood and ick, chest heaving. and chuuya, who looks identical, practically shouts in laughter, sending them into a full blown fit that has them clutching their chests and stomachs. they stumble forward and backward and inhale sharply only to immediately burst out laughing again when they look at each others faces, which read the inside joke they’re both thinking. they don’t account the moment in their mission report, but hirotsu certainly does in his.

[iceyrukia]

one of my favorite pastimes is watching these like ancient cosplay music videos from shows/fandoms at their “peak”. Good times.

[moonlit-imagines]

Headcanons for being ex-HYDRA and Bucky being your mentor

Bucky Barnes x teen!reader

warnings:

a/n:

prompt: @marvelflame2010: “Hello, can you write headcanons for Bucky Barnes being a mentor to a teenager (around 15-16) that was ex-HYDRA and is trying to be a hero? read your request rules, so I hope that this is proper. Thank you!”

sometimes it felt like no one knew what you had went through, being abducted and forced to be a weapon for a secret organization whose purpose was to gain more control

but when you met these avengers, it felt like everyone and their momma knew what it was like

bucky barnes, for example

the winter soldier, a WWII soldier deemed missing in action, presumed dead, and happened to be a prisoner of war and beyond

the experimentation and mind control he endured was much like your own, which gave you some comfort

“does it ever feel weird hearing one of your trigger words as a civilian? you know, now that we got ‘reset?’” -you

“not…no, not really? who’s speaking russian around you, y/n?” -bucky

“uh…i mean, no one. i’ve just been watching a lot of russian tv recently” -you

“why would you naturally assume i am also doing that?” -bucky

“why did you assume i didn’t?” -you

ok, thats not the greatest example of bucky mentoring you, but it’s a great example of sarcastic bickering!

honestly, the hardest part was learning how to be gentle again

if you could even say you were ever gentle to begin with being taken so young

it was hard to be so ruthless and unfeeling and have to start feeling

the nights of panic and anxiety were the worst, they made you wish you had that switch in your mind still. you’d whispered the trigger words to yourself sometimes to see if they were still there and if they could “help” you turn off those feelings

but bucky knew. he knew and he learned and he stuck with you

“y/n, those feelings are good” -buck

“no! no, they’re not. why are you saying it’s good to feel bad? i can’t breathe! i can’t think!” -you

“because you have feelings now. it’s the same as when you’re happy. you get to feel happy, it comes with all that other stuff. you have options, opportunities, this is one of them. you just have to take deep breaths” -bucky

combat training was the strangest feeling

“nope. too hard” “pulling your punches now” “your aim there was lethal” “you can’t put that much force into a chokehold” “cutting someone’s finger off isnt cool, y/n. kind of a dick move” “you automatically try to inflict severe injuries, arteries should not be the go-to. disarm your enemy first, if anything”

nothing ever felt right

if you were fighting effectively, you’d risk killing someone, which isn’t what you do anymore

if you held back too much, you’d be injured or killed, and all this would be for nothing

there had to be a sweet spot, but it was never what you were trained for. you were trained to eliminate your targets by any means

but you understood bucky all the same

bucky was there to help you acclimate to the norm too

like, whatever that was

says the guy with the metal arm and fought in world war ii despite the fact it was now like. 2020-something

like a normal ass dinner

“you know, i rarely ever got to go out to eat as a kid” -bucky

“can you ever say something that doesn’t make you sound ancient?” -you

“hey, you wanna pay for your meal tonight or do you want me to?” -bucky

“sorry…” -you

you liked to watch dumb tv shows (the american kind) with him

he’d indulge for a few minutes and then walk off unless he was REALLY interested

actually, he really enjoyed the office

“which avenger would each character be?” -you

“don’t…don’t make me do that” -bucky

“come on! you know, i kind of think phyllis and bruce are alike. like, theyre soft until they get mad and then all bets are off” -you

“that is…dumb” -bucky

sam really loved that bucky was there for you

but he saw that bucky was kind of doing it to distract himself too

“you know, me and steve found bucky just minding his business a while back. all he wanted then was to be alone, mind his business. this? this was what he needed” -sam

“what? a teenage hydra defector?” -you

“i mean, if youre gonna put it that way” -sam

“no, i get what youre saying” -you

steve actually didn’t come up too much, you know?

you thought bucky was trying to keep himself in the present as much as he could

which was what you were trying to learn from him in the end. how to move forward

taglist: @alwaysananglophile // @locke-writes // @sweetheartlizzie07 // @queen-destenie // @johnmurphyisqueer // @captainshazamerica // @ravenmoore14 // @canarypoint // @procrastinatingsapphictrash // @swanimagines // @randomfandomimagine // @petersgroupie // @summersimmerus // @scarthefangirl // @bad4amficideas // @sheridans-dynamos // @simsrecs // @prettysbliss // @skdkdkckfk // @simp-legend // @wild-rose-35 // @nekoannie-chan // @evilcr0ne // @v0idl1nq // @ruvaakke // @thedarkqueenofavalon // @amirahiddleston // @beth-gallagher22 // @brutal-out-here // @rqmanoff // @elenavampire21 // @mymelodymia // @pheonixfire777 // @deanzboyfriend //

[ohraicodoll]

Moments in Domesticity HC

Joel Miller x Feral Reader x Ellie The Last of Us (Show/Game) Feral Reader Masterlist Anon Requests: --“I'm loving all the domestic joel x red x Ellie content. So can we get an insight into how red and joel deal with ellies mood swings? I feel like after settling into Jackson, she will ease into teenage normalcy. I can see red trying to be helpful but just ends up in sleeping in the stables 💀💀💀“  --“Have you thought of red and joel and ellie in jackson 5 years later? like just domestic stuff. they’re all integrated and jackson has been their home for awhile...” --“I NEED to know how Joel would feel/act if red actually left them to go back to the wild, maybe in a jealous fit or something else. I’m begging u” Here’s a long list of different moments! I’ll be touching on stuff that happens after the first couple of years in a different fic, but these touch on stuff that don’t need full fics!

Despite Joel’s concerns, Ellie does make friends though it takes a while. The older kids are only required to go to a few classes a day and then have various jobs they’re suppose to do and she does bond with some of the other teens who think she’s cool. She’s different and when she tells them she’s killed Clickers and survived a Bloater, it cements her as a bad ass amongst them.

Ellie is quiet those first few weeks. They don’t push it but it’s the start of Red leaving little trinkets for her. A lava lamp she found, posters and books and sketch supplies. 

Red knows that Ellie is suspicious of the story Joel told her. Sometimes when the girl pokes, tentatively asks her about the hospital, she glosses over it. Says that she had been knocked out and didn’t come to until the “raiders” were attacking and she helped Joel fight their way out. They just had to get Ellie out. The truth is in there, under the blurry faux details, and it makes it easier to lie. 

There will be a day where she knows Ellie will push for the truth and all she can do is prepare for it. 

Defending Red helps draw Ellie out of her shell. That protective streak over both of them. More than trinkets and Joel trying to use board games and small tokens of the past, Ellie’s need to feel useful and protective is what does the trick. 

Spending time in Jackson with the animals and food and all the new helps as well.

Jesse is older and has taken more of a leadership position over the teens and it helps that when he’s on patrol and Joel is in the group, the older man gives him pointers. Joel notices sometimes how he stares at Ellie and keeps an eye on the boy.

He ribs Ellie about it over the next year or so until it’s broken to him that it’s not boys his kid is into, but girls. Which makes him suspicious of every teenage girl that was ever over in his house.

Joel finds his footing easier than them both. He becomes a valuable member of the patrols and goes back to helping with construction, the skills coming back easily. Though sometimes it’s hard watching Tommy have the life he thought he would have. Married with a baby on the way. His little brother is now the one in charge though he still can’t measure the 2x4′s worth shit and sometimes is dumb as bricks. It hurts but he’s proud of him.

It helps when he comes back home and Ellie is complaining about dumb homework at the table and Red is sitting on the countertop in the kitchen, trying to read the faded instructions on the pasta box. He’s needed in other ways.

There are mornings where Joel and Red get to sleep in. Those are usually the mornings where she is woken up by the slight push of the door opening and then a heavy pouncing on top of her before getting covered in slobber. Joel grunts and curses, covering his face with the comforter and Red tries to duck away from dog breath as Ellie cusses out, “Oh shit, Bowie no! Shit shit, sorry!”

“Ellie, what the hell did we say about bringing the dogs in?” He’s not as angry as he wants it to be, just annoyed as the heavy 80lb dog jumps around on the bed then flops down in between them like a second child. Bowie grins, trying to lick Joel, leash still attached.

“I was just walking him and forgot something in my room and needed to come inside real quick to get it but then he looked like he wanted some water and-”

Red only chuckles and whistles before signaling the dog off the bed, Bowie doing so immediately.

Waking up to dog kisses isn’t the worst. It happens more times than they can count, especially when Ellie is walking the puppies.

Swimming lessons start once the weather warms up. Tommy joins them to show where their usual swimming spot is. Him and Red sit a little higher up on a ridge edge and watch as Joel tries to show Ellie how to move her arms and feet. She clings to him like a toddler even though the water isn’t that deep and sometimes he has to support her stomach to keep her afloat while she gets it.

Tommy makes jokes from above at Joel’s expense, grinning at the comfort of hanging out with his brother and his kid again. That is until Red shoves him off the ridge and he hits the water face first.

If he still wasn’t slightly terrified of her, he’d splash her back.

There are progressive steps forward and some steps back. Joel and Ellie argue, both pushing and testing their boundaries with each other. Red and Joel fight, one not use to people caring about her and the other sometimes too protective. Ellie and Red fight, one desperately clinging to the other in fear of being left and the other worried the closeness will only hurt her. No one knows how to properly handle their emotions. 

They always make up. A tentative offer to take Ellie out to practice shooting the rifle. Joel trailing his fingers through Red’s loose hair, kissing the crown of her head softly. A book of pressed flowers given on the porch, the book Red has been keeping in her bag for years. The first pages are her journal from the beginning of the Outbreak before it stops. All peace offerings. 

Joel is a helicopter parent. When Ellie begins group patrols, he knows exactly who is leading the group and interrogates them after to make sure nothing went wrong and she is doing what she’s supposed to. He knows when she starts hanging out with new friends, like Jesse and Dina and Cat. Ellie is starting to go full-teenager so he tries not to let her know he’s doing it. 

Red catches Ellie making out with her first girlfriend Mia in her room. She doesn’t know what to do, only freezes and backs away slowly then walks back down the stairs. She doesn’t tell Joel.

When Ellie starts going over to friends houses, staying over often or going to hangouts, they relish in having their own space for the first time in a long while. Joel has every intention of fucking Red against every surface and wall, but only manages the couch before someone knocks on the front door. Tommy thinks Joel is going to shoot him for even asking if he can do a night patrol. Red may well murder him if Joel doesn’t.

Joel knows he has to take his time with Red, but patience isn’t a strong suit of his. He missteps a lot, tripping on invisible landmines. Her parents. Her sister. Harry. Those years after the Outbreak but before he met her. She freezes up sometimes and he knows the landmine has gone up in his face.

But she sometimes she drops fragments. Mentions that her father died in the initial chaos though there is nothing sad in her voice. Her mother’s is always mentioned in disdain. That things between her and Harry had been complicated in the year or so before the Outbreak. That things were tense with her family. The way she clams up when asked if she was with a group is it’s own hint. He doesn’t push, can only apologize and soothe the shrapnel damage of his mistake. 

There are days when Ellie is just in a mood. She’s snappy, easily irritable, gets sent home early from work duty for behavior (which in turn means Joel gets after her) leading to her being a ball of teenage rage at everyone. Red stays in the kennels those days because it’s easier dealing with a group of dogs than an angry teenager. Jamie, the head vet she sometimes works with, says it’s all part of raising a teenager.

They skip the monthly Jackson gatherings often as their time in town stretches on, though Tommy does bug them to go and actually be a part of the community. Red isn’t keen, especially after her dress experience with Maria, but Joel makes sure to stay at her side every time after. He doesn’t admit that he doesn’t mind going if only because he gets to stand with her, his arms around her waist and swaying slightly to the music, and making sure every man in town knows she’s his.

He doesn’t remember how the conversation leads to Red at the construction site. They’re working and the mention of her name comes up then her last name and instinctively, without thinking, Joel mentions it’s Miller. He can see Tommy’s head whip towards him, but neither of them say anything. 

When Joel finally fixes the guitar, he plays for them. His heart is in his throat but he tries to play it off as casually as he can. Ellie’s been in a mood and thank god, he sees her loosen up afterwards. He promises to start teaching her and once a week they have guitar lessons on the porch. Those are Red’s favorite nights.

They’re having family dinner at Tommy’s one evening when Maria asks teasingly if she needs to get Red some birth control. She freezes and it’s like she’s a trapped animal, breath shaky and panic in her eyes, before biting out a simple, “No.” It’s a little awkward and they try to play it off, moving on. That night he can see the nail gouges in her thighs from her own hands. Joel doesn’t know the full story, but knows her inability to have kids isn’t a natural occurrence. He’s seen the ugly scar on her lower abdomen enough times. 

Outbreak day is a bad day for everyone. The streets are quiet, everyone’s faces drawn. The town hosts a yearly memorial to honor the day and world they lost, but they don’t go. It’s the first year Joel doesn’t drink himself dumb if only because he doesn’t want to freak Ellie out. The teenager doesn’t have a tie to the day, being born long after. But she knows about Sarah and knows both her parental figures faced something horrific. So she does what any kid does and tries to lighten the mood. They play every board game in the house and Ellie picks the best puns and gently asks what Sarah’s favorite things were. It helps a little.

Some nights they get more bits of the lighter Red. They play the record player constantly but some days, the days when maybe one of them finds a new couple of vinyls, they’ll have a night where they each take turns playing their favorite. Red and Joel will drink a bit (and maybe let Ellie have some) and the teenager will grab Red’s hands and force her to dance with her. Joel soaks in the sound of their laughter and it’s like Red is so many years younger. He takes turns with each other them, spinning Ellie around and teaching her to two-step and dancing with his partner to the slower songs. He loves her through rage and violence, but he is at her mercy when she lets him have the fragile bits of herself underneath it all.

Once upon a time, giving someone that kind of control over him would have terrified him but he hands himself over willingly to her now .

Ellie’s first birthday in Jackson is small but they’re still getting use to things. No one knows the exact day she was born, but she knows the day that was on her papers in FEDRA school so they go with that. Joel gets food from the Food Hall and Red tries very very hard to follow a brownie recipe from one of the ladies in the shop. Joel plays her something on the guitar and, in true to them fashion, her gifts are a new revolver, another pun book (though unfortunately not by Wil Livingston) and the news that Brownie the puppy is hers to keep in the kennels.

Red sings for them for the first time that night.

Joel makes plans for a bigger birthday next year.

Danger still exists. It never goes away and Joel wonders if he doesn’t want it to, really. There’s still a thrill when his brother grabs them both to deal with raiders. Seeing that sharpness in Red come alive and the lack of hesitation as she pulls the trigger or draws her bow. The baring of her teeth when she stabs her knife.

He’s seen her tear through a whole group to save him during a patrol. Seen her rip out a man’s throat with her teeth to get to him when they had him trapped. Joel wonders at the broken part of him that enjoys it, seeing her covered in blood and completely feral and knowing it was all for him. 

Every time after, clean or tinged red, he loses himself and fucks her so hard his name is a chorus from her lips and there are gouges down his back from her nails. They were still monsters deep down but it didn’t feel like such an awful thing anymore.

It’s roughly a year and a half later when Ellie comes home with a large bandage on arm. Red is the one to see it first and after being assured she wasn’t injured, the outline of a large tattoo is unveiled, covering the bite there. 

She gets it, gets the fear of Ellie having to hide her arm because they’re afraid someone will shoot their kid. But seeing the tattoo churns something in her gut because it means Ellie’s letting go of that part of her identity as “the immune girl”. And while it should mean something good, that she was moving on, she knows hidden rage when she sees it and it’s deep in the teenage girl. It’s less a letting go and more the identity being ripped away from her.

It takes a bit to calm Joel down. He knows it was Ellie’s friend Cat that did the tattoo and the dad part of him rears up, telling her he doesn’t like her hanging out with that girl. It’s fear, they all know it, because the tattoo also means she showed Cat her arm. 

It’s a rough week. Ellie moves into the converted garage behind the house. 

Red feels unequipped to handle Joel’s fear and Ellie’s rage and all she can do is be there for both. She helps Ellie to decorate the garage, the same as when they first moved into the house, silently there at her side. At night, she prods and pushes Joel until he takes his emotions out on her with bruising fingers and rough kisses. Violence and sex are a comfort she knows well.

Joel and Ellie make up in their own awkward tentative way. Reminders about guitar lessons and dinner plans, requests to help fix the door and some of the walls in the garage. Red wonders if raising a teenager is like this for everyone.

Red goes missing for two days. Both of them panic and raise hell, searching everywhere for her. Ellie’s never seen Joel so out of control. He interrogates every patrolman at the gate roughly and it takes Tommy intervening to keep him from beating the shit out of a few. 

She checked out a horse and left, her bag missing from the first floor room. Ellie feels a knot in her throat and her mind plays on repeat “everyone always leaves” but Joel is pushing her bag into her hands and they off to the stables. Tommy and Maria don’t try to stop them. Red’s already been gone a whole day.

They search for her beyond the walls, calling out for her and checking their usual spots. The worst comes to mind of her getting hurt, getting taken by raiders, getting bit by infected. Because in Joel’s mind, Red would never willingly up and leave without a word. He can’t let that possibility sink in. Even if she did, he’d find her and drag her back to him.

They find her that evening. 

Her eyes are puffy and red and there are scratches all over her arms and hands. They look self-inflicted. She looks as wild as the first day they met her, huddled at the base of a large tree and hair all over the place. Joel approaches her cautiously, like he knows to when she’s more animal than woman, but it’s Ellie that goes straight up to her and hugs her around her waist without hesitating. Because she knows why. 

The book of pressed flowers Red had given her had journal entries that stopped right before the flowers began. The last entry had a date and the words “me, Harry, and Annie are going on a run tomorrow” in it and Ellie knows. 

Like a wounded animal, Red tried to hide her pain. The nightmares and the screams and the sounds in her head became too much and she had to get away. Sometimes all she could hear was her sister’s screams. But they dim in Ellie’s embrace and she lets herself come to the surface enough to hug her back and then lean into Joel when he joins them, kissing her head and holding them tightly. 

They'd always find her and protect her when she needed to shatter.

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[ravenalla]

Helluva S2 Ep 5 (yikes)

First off, I didn’t hate this episode at first. It’s nice to see Millie do something FOR ONCE even if it’s clearly something they thought up on the spot cause they realized how shitty they were treating her character. Glad it didn’t end with Moxxie having to receive constant validation from his wife once again, Millie being excited about receiving praise was cute even if kinda random and I’m glad she went off on how much she always supports him. I thought a lot of the physical comedy and jokes were better, at least when it wasn’t cutting back to Blitz screaming every second. The pacing still sucks, Barbie Wire stuff felt pointless and the songs were forgettable but at least it was quick.

And now the worse stuff. Jfc how hard would it have been to set this episode in a camp with ADULTS?? Like, the amount of straight up sick pervert jokes they did this episode was nasty, you literally start with Moxxie saying they shouldn’t mention sex as part of their personas given the age demographic and yet you have jokes about unsolicited nudes to a perceived minor, Barbie flashing her butt to a teen, and then Moxxie and Millie making out and taking their clothes off in front of an entire crowd of teens. That is not the kind of shit you can make casual jokes about, a good adult show would know how to make fun of the acts themselves without making light of it or making the victims the joke. Here all the teens are stereotypical idiots because any human character in this show is never taken seriously, so I guess it’s fine if Moxxie and Millie act sexual in front of teens who think they’re brother and sister because they’re our main characters who we are suppose to like, it’s fine if a grown woman made sexual gestures to a dumb teenager to get what she wants, WHO CARES the real important part is that she’s mad at her brother and hates him guys 🙄 that shit was gross and uncomfortable and I hated every minute of it I hope the writers start thinking before they put their fetish material into the plot lines bye

[misty-caligula]

To preface this, I’m going to be talking about growing up in a really generalised way, it’s not meant to be read as a critique of people or as prescriptivist. It’s just an overall framework, from my own point of view.

I think that growing up, graduating from childhood into adulthood, has less to do with age and more to do with personal experience. Because when it comes down to it I think that what’s most critical in the difference between an adult and an adolescent is that adults tend to put a lot more thought into our decision making process.

That’s NOT to say “Oh dumb teenagers don’t think about stuff.” Instead, I mean that those of us with more life experience have more experience of failure. Tend to be more aware of what failure means, in practical, real world terms. We’ve seen and felt and had to find solutions to the consequences of our actions, and through doing so we’ve learned not only how to mitigate those consequences, but also ... which decisions we absolutely do not want to repeat. We more appreciate and value the experience of peace and calm and stability because we’ve had our fill of chaos and the discomfort and pain that comes with it. And so when we make any kind of life choice we’re more likely to really think it through based on what consequences we can REALLY tollerate dealing with, what risks we can REALLY accept. And we learned that by ... fucking around and finding out.

The yellowjacket teens are really showing that process in full swing, and I think it’s such a big part of what I love about it.

Shauna, pre-crash, had unprotected sex with Jeff. She knew, logically, that there was a chance that this could lead to pregnancy. But it was a very ... theoretical, vague kind of knowledge. In the same way that you know, in theory, that if you don’t wear a seatbelt you might die in a crash. It was a bad decision on her part (no judgement but it was) which could’ve been easily mitigated, if only the reality of the consequences were more clear to her. Post-stillbirth Shauna is going to be radically different. To her the consequences are VERY clear, very real, very personal. If she were transported back to that night with Jeff she’d not have done it, even if she didn’t know for SURE what was going to happen, where they’d end up. She’d just have a deeper conception of what consequences REALLY look like, in practice. What a choice that you cannot take back really feels like.

Misty smashed the flight recorder, potentially dooming the entire team. Whether or not that’s why they’re not being rescued is irrelevant, it’s what she believes. She did it on the first day, in a very emotionally fragile and intense situation. This was a TERRIBLE fucking choice, but ... she didn’t think it through. She couldn’t have, fundamentally, understood what she was doing. Because the consequences again were so theoretical, so vague. And because she was running on a high of perceived competency, she was sure that she’d help them all out, be a hero. She might well have thought that she was just delaying rescue, that at some point they’d work it out and she’d just be a big hero. The true consequences of her action only begin to really hit months afterwards. When Laura Lee died, when Jackie did too, then Crystal and now the baby... Misty knows it’s all her fault. And the blood is literally on her hands. Things are only going to get worse from here, and this Misty, this 9 months older version, covered in blood and full of guilt, wouldn’t have smashed the box. Given the choice she’d have gone back and undone it. But she can’t. Sometimes we make choices that have HORRIFIC consequences, and then all we can do is survive them, and hopefully learn from them. That’s what growth IS. We learn from mistakes, but that doesn’t mean that those mistakes are any less disastrous.

I think this is fundamentally what the yellowjacket adults are missing. Their refusal to acknowledge and process their past - and the decisions they made and the consequences that came of them - robs them of the capacity to learn from those choices. They’re stunted in their growth, frozen in place. For all their extra years in so many ways they still haven’t grown up. Instead they’ve all built coping mechanisms to hold their trauma and pain so they can pretend to function as well as possible and hide the fact that they’re all so ... stuck.

And a large part of that really comes down, I feel, to guilt. They’re making a fundamental mistake where they’re judging the actions of their younger selves by their current realities. Shauna cannot realistically relate to pre-crash Shauna anymore, and cannot understand - or forgive - herself for her irresponsibility. Misty is so full of self-hatred and guilt, blames herself for everything, she can’t possibly look at that tiny version of herself with compassion and understanding and say “You fucked up so bad, but I won’t because you did.” They’re putting the consequences of their choices before the decision making which is a really common error people have when they regret things. They make a choice that goes badly, then they regret the choice because of what happened afterwards. But if it had worked out - even if it was STILL a bad choice - they wouldn’t regret it. And they can’t acknowledge or appreciate that error because they’re not processing or analyzing their choices properly, which is keeping them stranded in time.

As an adult it is SO hard to look back at a younger you with compassion and care, to say “Oh, look at you screwing up, don’t worry you’ll learn not to be so hurt. You’ll learn how to find your stride.” And I say that having NOT actually gotten lots of people killed or eaten my friends in the wilderness. I’m not exactly proud of many of the choices I made, but I can only imagine how much harder it’d be with their level of guilt and trauma, to say “It’s okay, I was a kid, what’s done is done and all I can do is do better.”

[towelpng]

Haiii this is my oc (Rene Petit / Daughter of God) origin storyyyy :)

All events, characters, and places are made the fuck up <3

CWS: weapons, physical abuse, torture, blood/gore (?), tragedy, the occult, christian extremism (basically not christian at all, just christian themes), death, suicide, all around very un-fun topics

please let me know if i left any out !!

As a secondary disclaimer, this may be a not very fun read!!

oki enjoy!!

—

Daughter of God

The meeting hall is an imposing building, too such a degree that I feel it necessary to check the signage in the tinted window. Sure enough, it reads simply “Life After Occultism”. I found the advertisement on a local page. A whole group about cult trauma? Sign me the fuck up.

I open the door, which obviously would have preferred I didn’t, given the grinding shriek its hinges released. It closes just as loudly, and the pristine white tile carries the sound down the hallway and back in what has to be my least favorite echo I’ve ever encountered. Unsurprisingly, the building is almost sterile. It did used to be a psychiatric institution, so I would expect no less in its glory days; but having been rented out sparingly for the last 30 or so years, I’d expected some level of dilapidation.

More laminated paper signs point arrows down the hallway, to an open set of double doors, not dissimilar to a high school gymnasium’s. As I approach, it’s already clear that the meeting started somewhat early. Several people are sat in chairs around the room, but most of the chairs are empty. Tables line the far back wall, dressed up in what appears to be birthday table cloths, held down by bins full of snacks and coolers of drinks.

“Hello,” I speak anxiously, finally catching the attention of the people in the chairs. “This, this is the… ex-cult thing?” I struggle to find the words among unfamiliar faces. A man in a brown suit nods affirmatively, a kind smile putting my nerves at rest, if only a little.

“Yes, it is. We start in,” He looks at his watch. “Oh!” He chirps. “Right now! If you’d like to take a seat…” He gestures widely, but gently, to the array of chairs. I thank him, and sit in a chair none too close to anyone else. A brief, awkward quiet falls over the group of what I have only just counted to be 8 people. 9 maybe, I’m not very reliable in terms of counting people. “Well, I, I suppose we start with you, miss.” He smiles warmly. “If that’s alright.” I nod nervously, and carefully and slowly remove an aged notebook from my bag.

“I have notes,” I chuckle nervously, and several others in the session return it with a sympathetic laugh. “Um, when I was growing up, my mom was in a cult, until I was 11, and she committed suicide. My dad was already dead by then, and my grandparents disowned her, so I basically got all of her stuff. Among that stuff was this notebook,” I drummed my fingers on it lightly, drawing the attention to the printed cover. “She liked faeries I guess. Before everything. Kind of hurts to look at.”

I hesitate a little here. I don’t talk about her often, and when I do, she’s a concept. Not a person. It feels strange to address her that way. I look up nervously, and make eye contact with the man in the brown suit again, then the blonde woman beside him. They share a similar complexion, and I wonder briefly if they’re related. She nods gently to me, affectionately.

“Um. The, the journal, has, a lot of weird stuff in it. It kind of goes off the deep end as soon as I’m born. Before that, it’s mostly just, teenager stuff I guess? Where teens will kinda revisit old journals every couple years.” I open it cautiously, and my stomach turns. Seeing her handwriting is almost sickening. A person, my mother, wrote these words with her hands. I get lost for a moment in the idea. I wonder if it was that dumb Dolphin pen that she was obsessed with, that never really worked, even when she replaced the ink cartridge.

“I could read it, if you like..?” The blonde woman offers gently, sympathy in her big brown eyes. “Only if you’re comfortable, I mean…” She trails off, looking away, then back to me. I grapple with the idea for a second, but give it to her, albeit holding on maybe a moment too long. She takes it gently, and doesn’t try to pull it away when I pause. She smiles at me again, and sits back slightly, holding the book up to read it.

“May 29th, 2003. It feels weird to hold this book now. My mom bought this when I was only 5, and now I’m writing in it on a desk attached to a hospital bed while my daughter sleeps just beside me! Rene Louise Holden, born May 28th, 2003 at 9:28PM, 8 pounds and 2 ounces. She’s the littlest thing I think I’ve ever seen! Her little feet are only as big as my pinkie! I was in labor for what had to be ages, I haven’t actually asked yet. For now, I think I’ll go back to sleep. It’s only 9am, and everyone’s saying to sleep when Rene does. So goodnight, Journal! I will see you soon!!”

The session livens up a little, with smiles and coos; none more genuine than the woman holding my mother’s journal in her aged, tan hands. This changes quickly.

“November 30th, 2003. I… I killed my baby today. I dropped her on the tile stairs. Her head hit right on the corner of one, and it collapsed in. I didn’t think that much blood could fit in a thing so little. It was everywhere. I could have identified her brain.” The woman paused a moment. “..I, I called an ambulance, and I opened the door for them. I knew she was dead, there was no use in trying to save her. But when we approached the stairs, there she sat at the bottom. She wasn’t happy about the strangers, but she looked just fine. The strangers weren’t happy about me. I’ll remember the judgement in their eyes as much as I’ll remember the blood in hers. It will kill me. They told me she’s fine, and checked her vital signs, but advised I take her to an urgent care soon. Soon. They said soon. I dropped my baby head first onto tile stairs, I slipped in her blood trying to reach my phone, and they said ‘Soon’. Like she scraped her knee. Journal, I worry about my mind. I don’t know if I’m cut out for motherhood. I feel like I haven’t been sleeping very well.” She turns the page with more urgency this time.

“February 3, 2005. It happened again. I was drinking, I know I shouldn’t. Rene was in the pool with us, in a pink flamingo pool float. We ran inside for only a minute, just to grab another drink. I thought someone stayed with her. It should have been me. She was upside-down when we came back out. And she was blue when we put her on the pavement.

“A miracle. That’s what they called it. They hardly touched her. They moved as though they would do CPR, but they never did. She just became pink again, and took a big breath. This time, they did take her to the hospital. No water in her lungs. No signs of hypoxia. Nothing. A miracle.”

She turns the page, and gently slides a news clipping from the paperclip.

“Uh… Oh.” She nods slightly, finding the relevance of the clipping, I guess. “Tragedy Strikes in Dosangels, Florida.

“This Monday, December 5th, local handyman David Holden fell from the roof of his home while putting up Christmas lights with his two year old daughter. His daughter had been strapped to his back, when he fell 26 feet on top of her, into their unused concrete swimming pool, which contained only 7 inches of water at its deepest. Miraculously, the infant survived the fall, but is in critical condition.”

She slips the paper back into its place under the paper clip.

“December 17th, 2005. The mortician says Dave was using again when he got on the roof. While Rene was in the hospital, Father Jaimes from the chapel visited us. I told him everything. He says Rene must be made for something great, and God will protect her. I told him I think Rene is cursed, and he didn’t make me feel evil for it in the slightest. He told me about Job, and how he was tormented by God to prove his devotion. He says I’m like Job, and must persevere. I feel like all I do anymore is persevere. I don’t know how to keep going. Dave is gone, and I won’t even be able to make rent. This was his house. His parents house. I cant afford it. I hope God does have a plan for us. Because I am lost.”

“November 7th, 2007. Jeremiah is moving in with us. His parents cut him off, and this is the first year he won’t even have Dave to help him. He and Dave were always close. He’s back on meth again, but he’s trying to get clean. He promised to get clean, and he goes to the detox place tomorrow. I could use the company.”

She turns the page, and is visibly disheartened as she pulls the news snippet from the paper clip.

“Miracle Baby Critically Wounded For A Second Time

“In 2005, she was crushed by her addict father when he fell off of the roof. This year, 4 year old Rene was shot by her uncle, Jeremiah Holden, who then shot himself. The murder suicide is…”

She turns the paper over, then turns it back over, and places it back under the paper clip. The mood in the room has soured considerably by now, but that’s what I’m here for, I guess.

“January 29th, 2008. Sepsis. Hospitalized.”

“January 14th, 2009. Father Jaimes has baptized Rene, after so many turns of her nearly going to Hell. My poor daughter, and her horrible mother. I will be baptized tomorrow, and God will save me too. I hope he can forgive me for my years of hubris and sacrilege, and my years of neglect to my daughter, my Rene. He let the holy water fill her lungs, and she breathed her first godly breath soon after. She looks to be glowing, she is a visage, the mother Mary surely felt as I do. Her eyes are blue, and reflect heaven unto us. May peace be with me, may she giveth as she taketh away, my Rene.”

“January 10th, 2010. Today was a day of great sacrifice and glory. God truly was with us, and with Rene. Lambs blood cleansed her holy skin, white as wool, and she breathed God’s child as He breathed Her. She first refused, and Satan had us in his grasp when She coughed and spit blood, but She was submerged and made whole nonetheless. My daughter, daughter of God and mine, His daughter and ours, my Rene.”

“May 27th, 2010. Today, before Rene becomes yet another year older, we try again tonight to send Her to sleep. In three days time, She will awake, and we will be saved. Her living blood will feed us, all of us, and Her internals will be laid bare to be judged. Our God, Her father, will guide us to ascension, and will save our miserable, undeserving souls. As Christ rose, so too will She, my Rene.”

“May 31st, 2010. God has abandoned us. All of us fell ill, with nothing to show a doctor nor a priest. We drained Her body wholly, from head to toe, of blood; and each organ was set separately of Her. She died only after we had removed Her heart, surely a sign. We drank the blood, as the disciples of Jesus once did, and it tasted of honey and vanilla. But we fell ill, and surely must have been poisoned. But doctors nor Father Jaimes found anything to be wrong. Her blood was taken from us, though She was not. Upon our return, She sat playing with the nativity dolls. She ordered them, mother Mary first, and baby Jesus Christ last. I wonder what this means for us. Rene, my Rene, please guide me.”

“December 5th, 2010. Father Jaimes laid bare to us his sins. He is a liar and a thief of the title ‘Father’, but I do not think of him this way. Anointed with holy blood collected from Rene’s own neck, Father Dresko beheaded Father Jaimes, and he was cremated promptly. May he follow us in our bodies, and be forgiven at Heaven’s gate. My Rene, show us how to proceed.”

“December 5th, 2014–“ The woman yelps and drops the book on her lap, the news clipping still in her hand. “Th..There’s blood, on.. On the page..”

“I can take it if—“

“No!” She cried sharply, then sighed shakily. “This is, it’s important. Right? It’s important…” She takes the notebook back in her hands, reading more quickly now.

“December 5th, 2014. My Rene, my God. Be with me in my final moments. My heart aches for you, for the trials you will face. I will see you at Heaven’s gate, and take you into my arms. You will be safe. But you must first save. Until we meet again, my Rene.”

The woman’s press-on nails scratch across the paper as she frantically places the news clipping where it belongs, giving the book back to me. The silence that fills the room is palpable, and it threatens to fill my lungs.

“Are you Rene..?” An older man asks me gently, his pale hand on my shoulder.

“Yeah, um. I just, didn’t actually die. I got lucky a lot, in a lot of situations I shouldn’t have been in.”

“Can I ask,” The man in the brown suit hesitates. “Can I ask where you went? After your mother..”

“Father Dresko adopted me. I wasn’t with him for really long, probably half a year, and he spent a week torturing me, held me hostage, and got shot by a police officer.”

“How could someone… I’m sorry, it isn’t my place. But.. How could someone do something like that, and not kill you…? If that was the intention, I mean.”

“He sucks at killing people, evidently.”

“Where did you go, after him?” The blonde woman rubs her arms in an effort to comfort herself.

“Karine Grienwilo. She was a saint, if anyone ever was. The type of woman who calls an anxious cashier ‘baby’ and fixes everything. Then I fucked everything up by going back. I made friends, Cameron Diniero tried to drown me and went to jail; Melina Fresno, Brady Harmin, and Jade Cabernaki threw me out of a car and almost under someone else’s car on the interstate and went to jail; Peter Ande and Jude Paton poisoned the church, Peter killed himself and Jude went to jail; and Sonia Wes committed suicide. Father Julio planned the poisoning and made it out easy, killed Jayla Barnes’ baby and she took the blame for it, then killed Karine in front of me.”

“Why would he do something like that?”

“To piss me off enough to get me to kill him. He thought it was the only way he’d go to heaven.”

A tense silence filled the room, but it felt more so that it was filled with unasked questions.

“Did you ever die?” A brunette woman asked. I hardly noticed her.

“Once. I got in a car accident. Semi slid on ice and cause a pile-up. I was the only one who lived.”

“How?” She asked tentatively, pulling at her sleeve.

“Luck, I guess.”

The man in the brown suit chuckled awkwardly.

“If anything, I’d call that a miracle.” I stared at him, and hoped he caught the message that the joke was in poor taste. He didn’t seem to. All at once, the fire alarms went off. As the group scattered, looking for the source of the fire, I stared out a narrow window in the emergency exit. Fire was already lapping at it. But just beyond it, the Sheriff’s van.

I waited until the only sound echoing in the tile and wood-paneled halls was the crackling and roaring of fire, and prepared for the worst walk of my life. The room I was in was full of smoke, but the openness of it ensured that only the walls and roof had caught.

I wake up in the car, taking a deep breath, and coughing. The cough is agonizing, and rips at my throat with all the ease of a sanding belt. Sheriff Petit sighed in relief, and I heard his head thump back on the headrest.

“Scared the hell out of me, rainy.”

“Sorry,” I croaked, but he cut me off with shushes, as he gave me an open bottle of water. I couldn’t help but gasp when the cold plastic touched my hands, searing pain shredding my palms.

“Right, shit,” He cursed under his breath, holding the bottle to my lips and pouring the water into my mouth. It was almost alien, I felt like my mouth was filled with sand, and it burned going down my throat. “How long does it take to clear up?”

“Um,” I sigh, my throat already beginning to heal. “It’s starting now, but it’ll take a few hours.”

We sit in silence, and I finally start to tune in enough to realize he’s driving.

“Hey Don?”

“Yeah, Ren?”

“How the fuck did you just give me water if you’re driving?” He laughed, loud and hearty.

“I stopped the car for a damn second,” He chuckled. “There’s a pedal for it—“

“Alright alright I get it.” My vision started coming back as my face healed, feeling less scaly by the second. I looked over at him, and could tell he’d been crying. “What’s up?”

He took a long moment to respond. I looked out the windshield, at the snowy landscape around us.

“I’m gonna miss you, rainy.”

“Cmon, I’ll visit! You’re basically my dad at this point. ..Like, my father figure, I’m not comparing you to—“

“I gotcha.” He paused again, but it was comfortable. Sad, sure, but comfortable. “It’s hard for me to just, drop you off someplace.”

“I’ll never get away from them if I stay here. They’ll always just bring someone new in.”

“I know. I just… I wish things were easier, I suppose.”

“Me too.”

The car slowed to a stop at a secluded, but obviously still functional, bus stop. We sat there for a while. There wasn’t much else to say.

“You’ll visit?”

“I swear to visit at least once a year.” He chuckles quietly, and pulls me uncomfortably over the console to hug me tightly. I squeeze him back as tight as I’m able.

“You better. I love you rainy. Stay safe out there.”

“I love you too, dad.” Before he got the chance to change his mind, I got out of the car and went to the bus stop, waving gently to him. He mouthed something that I could only guess was confirming I had my bus pass, and I held it up so he could see it. He nodded, and pulled off.

He was due to head to Texas.

And I’m due to get the fuck out of here.

[confessionsofa-roleplayer]

I've been writing my whole life and roleplaying for most of it. When I was in middle/high school, I was writing smut in fanfiction or with people my own age, with characters who were 15, 16, 17, etc.

I'm in my late 20s now. Guess what? I will still write smut with teenage "underage" characters sometimes.

"But OP you can't do that or else you're a creep who wants to diddle little kids!"

No. You know what I am? A better writer than I was when I was 16, who has 0 attraction towards minors, and who hates bad writing.

I like to revisit those stories and dynamics I wrote when I was younger, with the same characters I wrote back then, at the same stages of those characters' lives, but do them better.

When I was a minor writing that stuff, my writing was full of garbage and unhealthy thinking about what relationships were and toxic dynamics that were romanticized in all the wrong places. Of course it was full of that. I was a stupid kid surrounded by other stupid kids who all had stupid ideas about how the world and relationships work.

Now I'm an adult. I'm older, wiser, more experienced, and I know more about things that are problems and why they're problems. Teenagers in real life get into sexual situations, especially with other teenagers. I'm not afraid to touch that topic in fiction, but you know what I can do? Actually create better thought-out writing of how that would work in the real world, with realistic problems and concerns and consequences, instead of some ignorant idealized badly written teenage LaLa Land fetish fantasy where things just happen to work out all the time except for when your dumb child brain wants to throw drama in there for cheap "shock factor" but makes no narrative sense or lasting consequences.

No I'm not some "weirdo who wants to diddle kids" or wants to write teen smut to be a creep sexualizing minors. I'm a writer who was doing that shit when I was the same age as those characters, when writing about 16-or-so characters hooking up was developmentally normal. A writer who grew up, and who realized that old writing by younger me was problematic, blind trash who had never even heard of realistic "character consequences" and I could fix it and do it so much better justice now than when I was an ignorant, cocky kid who thought I knew how the real world worked back then and didn't have a clue.

I don't give a crap about "sexualizing" characters regardless of age. It does nothing for me in *that* way. I'm just writing the stories now that I wanted to write when I was 16, but didn't have the life experience and skill to do right. I can tell you anything I wrote when I was 16 was a lot more insulting and problematic than any "sexualized" content I'm writing now.

[seesgood]

she’s trending on twitter, and for once the messages coming in from her ( already minimal )  team aren’t positive about it. they keep telling her not to look --- but this is her life they’re talking about. her reputation. her future. her face, her body, her relationship --- all condensed conveniently into little bite-sized frames ( and now gifs ) for people to scrutinize. and it was a stupid, dumb, reckless decision that they made and now she’s what buzzfeed is hailing as  ‘this generations pam.’ she can’t not look. she also can’t sit still, so she’s pacing, and she knows she’s driving him crazy but --- it won’t be the same for him. nate jacobs is already a legend for being what he is, and what he is  ( on a good day )  is a bit of a dick who doesn’t give a shit about the way things should be done. she’s caroline forbes. of pre-teen disney fame and bubblegum pink reputation who spent the majority of her teenage years playing the best friend in a cheesy television show. they were just starting to take her seriously. and now this.

❝ i didn’t even know they kept stuff on the cloud for that long, ❞  she says it for the hundredth time, scrolling through an endless barrage of tweets from gross men cackling about the fact that carebear forbes likes to be called a good girl when she’s on her knees sucking someone off. vox is already spouting their catchy  ‘from good girl to good girl: caroline forbes and the sexual stigma we put on women’  and then of course there are the hoards of his adoring fans, giving her tips, tearing her down, proclaiming they could have done it better. she might throw up.  ❝ we have to do something. i mean we have to...say something? or maybe there’s like...like an outline we should follow, or...or... ❞  she stops, turns to look at him helplessly as if he somehow holds the solution to this entire thing.          /            @bulletsinthegun​   +   no bc it lives rent free in my brain and i need it to be a real thing so here i am to bug you.

[thestobingirlie]

Oh my god I saw about that hate anon and that was a wild read ngl. Also I saw the other stuff and it’s wild how many people create an idea of what Steve fans are like and then press that on Steve fans who have never said what they’re complaining about.

Yep yep yep! About people forgetting that they’re writing human beings like the characters themselves aren’t him an beings but they should resemble human beings ya know? Yes like all the teens have major complexity and I always hate whenever people just dumb it down on the complexity because that’s what makes it hella interesting. And also thanks for the fic I’ll def read it!

Yes exactly what you said about Nancy! Like it isn’t a great track record that and yeah it is def a trauma thing! But also like you said she could grow out of it but also I don’t want Robin in that mess! Especially since I did bring up she’s a lesbian in the 80s like she genuinely needs someone who is as serious as her in a relationship

Yes about the similarity because like idk how people saw being similar as being an indicator that you’re too much like the other person to work things out! Like we only see a few traits in Robin that are reflected in vickie but just because it’s reflected doesn’t mean that they’re the exact same! Yep people are seriously so nit picky about their relationship for more reason at all! Oh my god especially about that part about how they act like these characters are in their 20s and that’s the only relationship they will have. Like these characters are in their teenager years and idk why it’s so wild that people can’t comprehend the fact that they’re just teenagers and are most likely not in it for the really long haul. It’s amazing when relationships last that long however the way people in this fandom act like just because teenagers are in romantic pairings that means it’s the end all be all

Also you’re so correct about the Nancy thing and her probably doing that! Cuz I could so see it.

i know, it was so weird lmao. and yeah, people make up this idea of what steve stans are like, and then get annoyed at me for it! like, what’d i do?

yeah, like, obviously they’re just characters written to fit a narrative, but if you’re trying to write a fanfic, you have to at least try and make them seem like people. otherwise it’s just boring. and complexity is so fun! like i love a little toxicity between characters, so i just find it so weird to engage in a ship/relationship that would have a lot of tension and then get annoyed that it isn’t running smoothly.

yeah, i don’t think nancy will always have issues with her relationships, but i also don’t think they’re getting solved anytime soon, and that’s why nancy just needs to be single. like, everyone in her relationships is getting hurt in some way (including her), and until she confronts her trauma that will keep happening. and yeah, robin’s got enough going on, let her have a sweet little relationship.

a lot of people in the fandom contradict themselves constantly to try and prove that only their opinions are correct about the relationships. and that’s human nature! you know, i don’t hate them for it. it’s just fucking annoying lol. and i hate any fandom where the kids are teenagers and everyone acts like who’s endgame actually matters. like, they’re teenagers. they’ll probably break up in a week! they still have years of growing left to do! that’s why i like when some ships are left ambiguous. like, i’d love if nancy ended the show single, and if the audience wants to, they can decide if she ended up back with jonathan or steve, or ended up with some random, you know?

it’s tough being so correct about nancy when most of the fandom disagrees with me lmao

[justanotherboringwriter]

||TWO undead lovers :3||

Summary; after a few years and a whole lotta mur–Er, deaths that coincidentally followed Jim like an annoying mosquito (Totally not his fault)–Jim Pickens meets an old flame and introduces him to his new husband and they’re all happy. And in love. And weird.

A/N; I’ve been watching CallMeKevin vids for like 2 days and I honestly adore the Jim Pickens storyline, especially the romance between Jim and Agner and Jim and Grim so why not just make them polyamorous? Yet another win for our dear leader Jim Pickens!

Wordcount; 1,021

Jim finished settling a grave down, standing back and admiring the few graves beside his stand. He looked to the small oven and walked over, sliding the tray out and settling the pizza in a box beside two other pizza’s, waiting for more customers as he adjusted the four plates of Pufferfish Nigiri. He sang ‘Country Roads’ to himself, thinking of checking on his farm soon.

He hoped Kevin wasn’t busy doing something dumb again. Or that Santa had been pecked to death by that evil chicken but what’s the point of having an evil chicken other than having it randomly kill people? He heard a drawn out groan and looked over, a bright, psychotic smile overcoming his face as he was greeted with the sight of one of his many lovers. “Agner!” He said enthusiastically. Agner let out another long groan, looking tired and slightly annoyed.

Jim rushed around the stand, jumping into Agner’s arms, wrapping his arms around the zombie’s neck. “I missed you sooo much, honey!” He said, kissing his cold cheek as Agner held him up, leaning into the kiss. “You’ve missed out on so much–Being dead must take up a lot of time, hm? But that doesn’t matter anymore because now, we’re finally together again!” He added as he was settled on his feet. “C’mon, I have someone I want you to meet!”

After a while, they arrived at a bunker. “I hope you don’t mind the mess..I live with a few people and it’s pretty hard to keep up good looks when there’s four adults, a teen, a child, and a dog in your bunker. You can stay in my room!” Jim chuckled awkwardly, pushing open the door to the bunker and shutting it behind Agner. “You first.” He said flirtatiously and watched as the zombie slowly made his way down into the bunker, followed quickly by Jim. Jim took his hand again, “You wouldn’t mind a polyamorous relationship, right?–It’s when there’s more than two people in a committed relationship. Things got a bit..intimate while you were gone. And I have a teenage alien son.” He sighed, leading Agner through the bunker and to his own bedroom.

“Stop barking!” Jim yelled angrily at Scobay Du who was barking while running in a circle, chasing his tail. Agner raised a brow but didn't speak, continuing to be led along. Jim pushed open the door to his bedroom, “This is the best place in the bunker! Only for you, me, and Grim!” He said proudly. “Oh, you don’t know Grim, do you?–No, wait, you do. He’s the Grim Reaper. And he took you when you died. Then when you died as a zombie.” He added, sighing and looking off.

Grim, laying in bed sleeping, woke up. “What are you yelling about now, darling?” He asked groggily as he sat up, rubbing his always tired eyes, annoyed at being woken up by his insane husband’s rambling. “Hi, baby. You remember Agner, right?..” Jim replied awkwardly, motioning to Agner as Grim threw the covers off his legs, walking to Jim and taking his hands, leading him aside. “Jim, darling, listen, I love you–It’s the reason I proposed to and married you, but you really can’t keep doing this stuff. I know you’re the leader of The 15th Street gang and you’ve dealt drugs but I’m convinced you still have some of your stash and are doing it every 4 hours. Be honest with me, is it the cocaine or are you naturally like this?” He whispered.

“I still have my stash but I’m not doing it! I may have dealt it, but I never actually snorted any of the coke, okay?” Jim huffed.

“I’m just naturally like this, baby. Did you not realize I had a few screws loose? I thought this was part of my charm! People love being a little crazy, don’t they? I mean, why else would everybody always be so interested in me?” He added, pulling Grim close and wrapping an arm around his waist and giving him a brief kiss on the lips. “It was but also, you’re a damn mermaid. People can’t really resist the allure of an ethereal voice and otherworldly beauty. Plus Southern charm..” Grim muttered. “But that’s not the point; you have to discuss things such as polyamory with me before you drag home your undead boyfriend. It’s just something that makes me uncomfortable, alright? I have no issue with it but talk to me about it first, okay?” Grim held Jim’s free hand, pressing featherlight kisses to the skin of his calloused knuckles.

“Good to know. I assume that’s a yes?” Jim responded, enjoying the affection. “Yes, it is.” Grim replied. “And next time you come into our room, don’t immediately start with the schizophrenic rambling, alright? Pretty rude way to wake me up, darling.” Grim gave Jim a kiss which the mermaid leaned into, kissing him back and smiling against his lips. “Alright! So, Agner.” Jim looked to the zombie as he was inspecting a picture on a nightstand.

It was of Jim and Grim’s wedding with Grim in a white suit and Jim in a wedding dress, Grim holding the man up bridal style as rice was thrown on them from cheering bystanders while Jim was smiling brightly and Grim had a slight, calm smile on his lips. Agner lifted up the framed picture, looking at it even closer, stoic. “Don’t worry about that, Agner. You’re our boyfriend now. How about we go to bed?” Jim tilted his head, taking Grim’s hands and leading him into bed, kicking off his shoes. Agner settled the picture down and nodded, getting under the covers with the two other men and cuddling against Jim. Grim sighed and also cuddled against Jim.

“And when you wake up, don’t be loud.” Grim muttered to Jim. “I won’t! I promise. Pinky promise.” His husband replied. Grim gave Jim a kiss on the cheek, “Good. And, I know you won’t be loud either.” Grim reached over and gave Agner a kiss before laying back down, closing his eyes and relaxing.

[stupendousbookworm]

Guys. I have something rather important to discuss today

its basically about the fandom. There’s a lot that’s going on right now and I want to address an issue.

we all know that Harry Potter: Hogwarts Mystery takes place in a magical school for PRETEENS and TEENS who are also quite UNDERAGE

look, as a teenager in the older spectrum, I can totally understand that stuff does happen, and there can be.. Many instances where really inappropriate (for their age) stuff happens between two people, but like,,, romanticizing such things is not that great

teenagers are young and naïve and we tend to do dumb shit here and there but talking about explicit things… is really pretty much illegal at this point

i really do appreciate creators who do censor their work and MENTION that the characters are 18+. Thank you for that. You’re protecting the minors in the fandom

another thing I wanna say is that there are preteens and young teenagers in the fandom. We actually cannot ignore that at all, and although it is HIGHLY questionable that they’re on the internet at such a young age, we cannot blame them

look, I was a kid born in the early 2000s , and I didn’t have much access to the internet growing up. But the new generation is quite the opposite and we much respect the era thats currently on-going, and make sure we’re not a “threat” to young kids

and also, please please please please PLEASE make the characters at least LOOK older, even if you mention that “they’re 18+” doesn’t mean that they look 18+. Just tweak up the designs to make them look older because Jesus fucking Christ you have no idea how many times I’ve heard about these problems

i doubt ill be in this fandom for long. And i though that addressing this issue would make this lovely community into a better place for everyone

im not accusing anyone.. I’m just requesting all of you to be responsible

[science-lings]

I was thinking more along the line that Wild is good with kids but he is also a teenager who is just done with the world and doesn’t always have the energy to correct the shit Mask and Wind do but can and will entertain the two younger teens with bullshit things. Actually the idea of them being a pack of teenagers doing dumb shit together works much better. Like they each can get on each others cases sometimes, but no one is the adult.

Wild’s vibe is I got hired to be a babysitter but I have no idea what I am doing and these kids are pretty old so I guess we are just gonna chill.

Wild also definitely had to introduce Mask to different foods via stews that have a milk base. Hilarious thought: Wild knows that he has to eat a well balanced meal but sometimes can’t stomach looking at them, so he makes a lot of shit with hidden greens and stuff so that is how he gets both of the others to do the same. It that thought of ‘I know I need to eat healthy but I don’t want to know that I am eating healthy when I am done.’

SSB Anon

Oh yeah they’re definitely a pack of idiots but Wild would feel pretty bad if one of them got hurt trying to copy one of his stupid stunts, so he has to try his best to not be too much of an idiot around them. The only thing stronger than his reckless nature is his guilt complex.

Also the idea that Wild has to hide veggies in his food but is fine with eating all the monster parts and creatures in his elixirs is so funny. Maybe he hates mushrooms but they’re some of the best ingredients for effects so he has to deal with that somehow.

[olderthannetfic]

my mom and her sisters are all getting into bts, but they’re very much in it for the music and the dancing and pretty boys, less for fandom stuff. so, who are your favorite members/ships/fanon?

--

Oh god. Where do I start?

There are a lot of eras of fanon you can see in different fics, and there are different flavors of fanon depending on what ships someone likes. While I like actual BTS a lot, particularly for their rap, I treat the fic more like original BL. I like a lot of different versions, and I prefer the more multi-shippy authors who aren't so wedded to the few really big ships.

RM is probably my favorite overall just as an artist (and pretentious philosopher), but I love them all as stock fic characters.

I like namkook because I like "Sempai, notice me!" ships. I'm also a sucker for anything where a mentor type is having a meltdown internally about how bad they are for their crush on The Baby... meanwhile The Baby is a filthy little demon who is not only actively pursuing the mentor but is like "Can you hold me down and call me rude names?"

There's some interesting fic set earlier in their careers (or riffing off of that in another setting) about Jin being hired only for his face and whichever other member being hired only for their talent and their mutual jealousy/distrust/etc.

There are obviously a zillion possible ships, especially considering how often people go for ships with more than two. I more often do tag searches for vmin, sope, namkook, rapline OT3. Sometimes, I look for jihope or for vmin+another member. I'm partial to OT7, particularly of the JK/everyone variety, but there aren't a lot of fics that aren't just mindbreak porn or something. People often send me good recs for namgi, namjin, taejin, yoonjin, and jikook with top Jimin.

I don't actually care about the sex positions part, but I find that a lot of bottom Jimin fic is egregiously woobietastic in particular ways I hate. Taekook has a ton of fic, most of it extremely annoying to me, but I still check it out reasonably frequently because I'll be searching for magic school AUs or whatever, and it will come up. Minjoon and yoonmin also have a lot of fanon I find stupid and annoying, but I'll still read fic if it comes up in some trope search, especially if it's one of those fics with them divided 2/2/3 and all of the ships mattering in the fic. My biggest hate is reserved for anything that turns either Namjoon or Hobi into a thinks-he's-straight fuckboy who needs to learn a Very Special Lesson™ about modern US queer identity as seen through the lens of tumblr. Times one billion if either Yoongi or Jimin is the femme woobie in that fic. Did people listen to that fucking Tony Montana song? Did they? JESUS CHRIST. (Okay, "Expensive Girl" and "Trouble" are also hilarribad in similar annoying teen boy ways, but have people forgotten Jin was on the latter too?)

Basically, one of my rage buttons in any fandom is people equating someone being genetically taller or having a less idol-looking face with their approach to sexuality, identity, and gender. We all fucking wish our bodies looked like our insides. Half of tumblr would be androgynous, sylphlike ectomorphs if we could. But guess what? We get to be short, fat, and have giant boobs that are hard to hide. Not all of us. But a lot of us. I think I've got a pretty hot body, but it's not necessarily the body I'd have chosen, you know?

Fic where someone's like "I wish I was small and cute" and someone else is like "Fuck you, I'd kill to look big and manly like you" is interesting. Fic where your body is your personality is not.

Anyway, all of BTS appear to have been dumb teenagers, whether that's an excessive love of Scarface (ugh, film bros, why) or watching so much porn they filled the dorm computer full of viruses (lol, Namjoon and Jin, you thirsty bitches). I don't really care what people extrapolate from this in fic as long as it isn't some tired "RM is tall so he's The Man and Jimin is short so he's The Girl" shit.

Uh... anyway...

I like fic where all 7 of them are there and important to each other if it's an AU. If it's set in something approaching their real careers, I often like it if their other friends and associates are mentioned and they have a life outside of the group, though since I'm not that familiar with most of the famous people they're known to be friends with, I often like that better as a catalyst for "We pretend to be bffs for our reality tv shows, and now I'm insecure because I want to be that close for real but what is real when you're an idol????"

[queer-whatchamacallit]

Me ranting abt young royals let’s go!!

A teen drama where the main couple actually communicates with each other? The first of its kind

And the characters look like real people!!! And like teenagers, very poggers

The amount they do drugs is kinda weird but when you’re that rich you have access to a lot ig??

They’re all just dumb kids and it’s so good

August is kind of a mess

Like it’s not that hard to not cheat on your girlfriend with her best friend

I don’t know if I like Sara or not

I think I’m used to seeing a certain type of neurodivergent character, being the naive, shy, nerdy sort of character (you know the type) and I really vibe with that

So I think I just sort of assumed that was what her character was going to be and was almost kind of surprised when they actually made her a character with flaws

I don’t know why I didn’t like Felice?? I mean I was a little put off by her “masturing” to a pic of Wille and I don’t actively dislike her but she’s kind of meh ig

Is Wilhelm just not going to be pissed that Simon was selling drugs?

Wille and Simon are so cute istg

The scene where they’re avoiding August and Wille just keeps his hand on Simon’s mouth for a little too long? Aaaaa /pos

The first kiss? So cute and awkward and like a first kiss would be

The football field scene? Perfect. Quotable. Wille being high and going to the place that makes him think of Simon is the best thing.

Them just messing around the morning after they slept together? Adorable omg

That one scene where they’re in the locker room? My personal favorite, the best way to describe it is that they just want to be so close and comfort each other that they want to occupy the same space

The hug? I want to sob

Thinking about Simon beating the shit out of August :)

Felice and Madison are the best I love them

I thought of them platonically but them being romantic kinda slaps too

And also Felice and Sara

Erik </3

He was such a good brother

When they were about to tell Wille about his death I rlly thought that would be the outing scene (bc apparently you just can’t have a closeted character without one) so I completely didn’t expect it

I love how it actually seems like they have wardrobes and you can sort of tell a character’s favorite clothes based on which they wear most

Like Simon’s green bomber jacket and Wille’s necklace

I love how different Wilhelm looks between when he’s at school and away from his parents vs. when he’s doing prince stuff and has to look all fancy

I wonder what his dad is like, we didn’t really learn anything about him

Aight I just love this show, now let’s hope for season 2!!!

[1tad0ri]

hey babe listen...do you think megumi would ever do something in public? Like, you've been teasing him all day and when you're all at the table eating with the others, you would suddenly feel his pretty long fingers inside you while he whispers to you to not make a sound 🙃 (i imagine all of this in front of our poor baby yuji who doesn't understand why you became so red all of a sudden lol)

BABE i was so conflicted if i should save this to write something for it or just do a thirst type thing for it BUT YOU ASKED ME MY THOUGHTS SO I HAVE TO ANSWER also i have a million megumi things to post and i’m trying to spread them out over a few days but i wanted to talk about this NOW so here we are

omg stop the idea of his fingers is doing things to me 😭 i keep sitting here and thinking about it help

as they say: never say never! i think he’d eventually do something in public, yes :) especially because he’s a teenage boy (i mean like 18+ still obvi tho like if anything that age group is the mf worst, trust me, what is wrong w college boys 🙄 late teens is a dark time for them) this is kinda bold tho 😳 go big or go home, that’s my man 🥰 ur like AJDJSJJWJS MALFUNCTIONING when it happens because a.) MEGUMI WHAT ARE YOU DOING but also b.) THE ONE TIME HE actually does something like this, it’s like the boldest and worst (best) thing he could do LIKE YOU’RE SO SURE YOU’RE GOING TO GET CAUGHT

you wrap a hand around his wrist, glancing at him out of the corner of your eye, and even though it feels so good, you find the strength in you to tug at his hand—oh, but he’s so much stronger so in retaliation he just stuffs them in deeper. he’s so mean :( god, you’re clenching around him so much the entire time and he’s so hot pls he would be stone-faced and calm on the outside but ACTUALLY he’s also having a melting down on the inside because you’re so fucking hot and god can you leave already yuuji, we are busy here

idk why but i just like the idea of him kissing your cheek during this? 😭 like maybe it’s the contrast between the FILTHY and the softness idk. but he gives you a little peck at some point and you don’t usually do a ton of pda so everyone is a little teasing about it and surprised he did that but they’re like megumi <3 we’re so proud of you for finally manning up <3 like umm he’s already on stage 3 here u guys are behind. ughhhhh but you just squeeze around his fingers when he does that because you just love him so much 🥰 you have to resist the urge to kiss him because you’re constantly on edge with everyone else here like UGH 🙄

yuuji asks you if you want water or something like ty u r so caring ily my pink haired baby <3 but megumi is an ass and curls his fingers bc he’s like why is she talking to HIM while i’m busy doing this, do not ignore me 😐 and there’s a choked noise you try to muffle in your throat because MEGUMI you did NOT need to hit the perfect spot dear god, any other time that would be appreciated but NOT HERE

yuuji is dumb, he won’t figure anything out don’t you worry queen <3 anyways megumi would look sooo pretty during all of this and he’s a bit more bold and teasing as well i’d say because if he’s doing something like this in the first place, you already know he’s too far gone. he’d be worried about someone noticing tbh and he gives you this look that’s like shut up. ur such a slut aren’t you? meow like idk he just has that look down pat bc he’s always staring at ppl so exasperated and wanting them to be quiet

but yeah, let’s say you initiated something in public, he’d be a lot more worried about people noticing, but the fact that he initiated it honestly means all of his reasoning has gone out of the window, yummy dom vibes he is so pretty ughughugh HIS FINGERS ARE SO GOOD and they just curl the right way and hit all the perfect spots even from this angle and your legs are shaking under the table, but he kind of rubs his thumb soothingly against you? just wherever he can reach it. or he’ll shift a bit so he can (non-suspiciously) reach over with his free hand to give your thigh a quick squeeze to let you know he’s got you