#Vulnerability and masculinity

[your-just-a-man]

Redefining Masculinity: Breaking Free and Being Real

“The best way to destroy something is to pretend it’s not there.” – Terry Crews Hey everyone, Growing up, I lost count of how many times I heard stuff like “Man up” or “Real men don’t cry.” So, I did what I thought I was supposed to do—I shoved my feelings down, put on a tough face, and tried to fit into this idea of what a man is “supposed” to be. But honestly, it never felt right. Society…

[elvenbeard]

Sonic Surge Issue 04/2025 - Exclusive birthday interview edition

Did I make a whole new appearance with custom tattoos, new bandana, edited hair and beard and everything just for his birthday? Maybe, because I am one of those people that celebrate the heck out of fictional characters' birthdays xD And I will forever love that he's only 5 years older than me XD

But yes, I got one more thing planned with this appearance, because if it looks familiar, it's because I took a ton of inspo from the little pic on his netsite in game XD Only the neck cyberware is missing (but I have headcanons for that) and I'd like to try and see if I can give that to him somewhere down the line too to finalize the look :D But even so, this was fun, both from the modding and the VP stance! Making something a little more elaborate VP wise again, which I've really missed, and trying something new (editing vanilla hair) when it comes to modding! I mean, it is basically his 2077 hairstyle, but I tried making it a little bit messier xD I like how it turned out, even if it's not a huge difference, but the different color and the bandana help selling it I think uwu

ANYWAY I also have a part two and three planned for this so stay tuned XDD

Also, some "raw" photos for everyone who read my ramblings this far:

[waitineedaname]

I was thinking about binghe, as is typical of me, and specifically I was thinking about whether he's bisexual or gay, which of course led me to think about bingge and the harem and how what bingmei has that bingge doesn't is that he's loved, and then had the thought "the reason bingge's marriages were ultimately loveless isn't because of his wives' gender but because of his own" and then i had to fucking stop in my tracks for a second. It all always comes back to binghe transgenderism

[metamorphicmuse]

Briefly Beautiful

[a-dotrivenitupontop]

found family doesn’t have to mean ‘we can’t fuck each other’ or ‘were a group of friends with a mum friend’ sometimes it means john was missing a son so he used everyone but especially amanda to fill that gap and amanda was missing a father so she used john to fill that gap and hoffman was missing a sister so he used amanda to fill that gap and lawrence was missing a lover so he used hoffman to fill that hole and logan just liked talking to billy

[silverwhittlingknife]

hi Silver! o/ because that fanart made me wonder - would you happen to know when/where Dick's stuffed elephant plush Zitka turns up in the comics?

GREETINGS CAM <3333 THAT ART WAS SO CUTE

Yeah, I think your instincts are right - it's a truly adorable bit of transformative fandom, but I'm 95% percent sure it's not comics canon. Barbara has canon plushies, but I don't think anyone else does.

I got kinda invested in the investigation (it's hard to prove a negative!) and I ended up typing out an entire History of Elinore/Zitka, so, uh, if you're curious, meet me below the cut for:

Where does Elinore / Zitka - the animal - appear in comics?

Did Dick ever have a stuffed elephant toy in comics?

Where does Elinore / Zitka appear in comics?

We're gonna go in chronological order!

Dick's circus elephant friend was first created for practical reasons: in Batman 436, Marv Wolfman does a big expanded flashback to Dick's circus backstory as a way to subtly show us Tim before officially introducing him (so that we can have a technically-solvable mystery-of-Tim's-identity in LPoD). In this comic, there's an elephant named Elinore who loves Dick:

Aww. Such a cute elephant!

Batman 436 comes out in August 1989. New Titans 60 comes out a few months later, in November, and guess what? When Dick visits the circus, he is suddenly surprised by an unexpected blast from the past! It turns out that even though it's been years, Elinore still remembers him!

Here's the part where Elinore remembers Dick:

SUCH a cute elephant. I love her.

(Guess who else still remembers Dick even though it was so long ago. Guess which other character is about to be an unexpected blast from the past. Guess which character Elinore is directly paralleling guess guess guess sorry everything is about Dick and Tim in my mind but I can focus I swear)

Four years later, in 1993, Batman: The Animated Series retells Dick's origin story. They like and keep Wolfman's elephant, but they change her name to Zitka:

Wolfman doesn't return to the elephant beyond those two appearances, and a few years down the line, New Titans gets cancelled and Wolfman's not writing Dick anymore anyway. So the animal gets abandoned for a while, until Devin Grayson, a fan of both Wolfman and B:tAS, revives the Wolfman-era Titans team in JLA/Titans and then the ongoing series Titans 1999.

Grayson then brings back the elephant in a flashback to Dick's past in Titans 16 (Jun 2000), where she imports the B:tAS name. Sometimes I'm skeptical of TV-to-comics imports, but honestly, I endorse this one. You lose the alliteration, which is a shame, but IMO Zitka is a better elephant name than Elinore.

Here's Dick with the newly-christened Zitka in Titans 16:

Grayson also briefly references the elephant in Gotham Knights 20 and - in a final angsty callback - in Nightwing 88 (Feb 2004), where Zitka tries futilely to comfort Dick in the midst of his trauma conga line:

... And... honestly, I think that's it for comic appearances? The two Wolfman comics plus the three Grayson comics.

Both Wolfman and Grayson are writing multiple titles - Batman, New Titans, Titans, Gotham Knights, and Nightwing between the two of them, spanning a big chunk of Dick's post-Crisis canon - and both writers use the elephant for heartwarming moments of nostalgia, which means if you're doing a post-Crisis readthrough for Dick, Elinore/Zitka feels memorable. But I don't think she actually shows up that much.

For post-2011, I am not as well-informed - throwing this out to the dash? anyone know? - but I feel like Zitka the heartwarming symbol of Dick's heartwarming circus past is, uh, thematically very at odds with the Court of Owls evil!circus vibes, so my instinct is that this story element was almost certainly dropped in the reboot.

Did Dick ever have a stuffed elephant toy in comics?

In WFA, yes; in main comics continuity, no. Technically, I have not read every comic ever published, so I could be wrong!! But I don't think so.

Below, find my rambling reasoning on the tonal vibes of pre-Crisis, post-Crisis, and post-2011, and why this particular story element doesn't seem right to me for the first two.

Pre-Crisis (...okay, mostly the Silver Age): stuffed animal, yes or no?

tl;dr no, requires too much background knowledge on the part of the reader, plus the elephant wasn't a thing until later

Elinore doesn't get created until post-Crisis, but also just generally, pre-Crisis callbacks are more along the lines of this reference in Batman 129 (published in 1960), where, wow, Batman and Robin are hunting jewel thieves - and it turns out Robin recognized this strongman! BUT HOW?!

The comic goes on to recap Dick's entire origin story in flashback, on the assumption that you may not know it.

(BTW, if you'd like to know more about Haly's Circus throughout the years, nightwingology has a great post here summarizing a lot of fun plotlines and characters!)

Basically: Silver Age comics are very self-consciously episodic and kid-friendly; they're not generally gonna do overly-elaborate callbacks because they don't know what comics their kid readers may have randomly picked up or remember.

By the time of post-Crisis, comic books were being written for an adult audience buying from the direct market, i.e. readers who are collecting whole runs & don't need or want Dick's origin story to be recapped to us in full every time it's referenced. That's why in post-Crisis, we get stuff like "hey, neat, this particular soda brand is getting mentioned in several different books!!" or "in order to understand this story arc, buy SIXTEEN DIFFERENT COMICS in FIVE DIFFERENT RUNS and read them ALL ACCORDING TO A NUMBERED ORDER and also you better be following the individual plotlines and recognize these five minor characters who we don't bother to introduce!! Good luck!!" But the elaborate post-Crisis plotlines - and subtler worldbuilding like a stuffed animal callback to Dick's backstory - don't make a lot of story sense UNLESS you're imagining your readers as completionist adult fans.

So IMO a stuffed animal wouldn't be a pre-Crisis thing unless it was The Episodic Story Of the Week, and I don't think a stuffed animal is action-adventure-y enough for the fast-paced storytelling of the Silver Age. (Unless it, like, came to life and tried to eat you or something.)

Post-Crisis: stuffed animals, yes or no?

tl;dr: no, Dick's a manly tough guy, he's not gonna have a stuffed animal, that'd be lame, like something Tim might do

Part of the edgy grimdark adult vibes in 80s/90s comics is that some characters who used to be kinda silly & goofy & lighthearted - like Batman and Robin - get reimagined as Serious and Angsty and Edgy in a Tough Cool Manly Brooding Way. This massively affects characterization for Bruce, Dick, and Bruce and Dick's relationship.

(I obviously love this change & love the tense Bruce-and-Dick interactions, but plenty of fans of the earlier fluffy comics really disliked the edgy retcons of Miller / Wolfman / Starlin / et al.)

The upshot is that post-Crisis is a period when you could have a recurring reference like a stuffed elephant, but you wouldn't have a stuffed elephant, not for Dick. I think a toy like that would be too cutesy / childish / effeminate to give a male character in post-Crisis, unless you were poking fun at him.

Now, you could probably let Tim have a stuffed animal, because Tim is sometimes cool but also sometimes a tryhard loser who is faking being cool and not entirely pulling it off (see e.g. the Robin comic where he practices tough-guy faces in the mirror, or the Teen Titans comic where Conner discovers his cringy Enya CD, or when he's fanboying over Connor and it's awkward, etc etc.). A stuffed animal would be deeply embarrassing, and you'd have to be careful to compensate by having Tim do something cool afterward - but Tim's character concept allows for "he's kind of a loser sometimes."

But Dick isn't!! In post-Crisis, Dick's a tough / impressive / "cool guy" character, the kind of guy anyone would want to be, even in the flashbacks where he's Robin, and even in the stories where he's more lighthearted than angsty. It'd be kinda lame for Dick to have a stuffed elephant, so he wouldn't. I feel like Dick would be more likely to poke fun at it if someone had one, like when he's making fun of Wally for liking the Hardy Boys. Dick could have a Batman action figure, at most, and if he had one he would have it ironically.

Basically: in post-Crisis, a male character hugging a stuffed elephant feels more likely to be a punchline to me, not something poignant. (Even with Tim, Tim could have an embarrassing stuffed animal, but he couldn't hug it when sad - that's too far. Maybe Booster Gold might do this. Probably he wouldn't, but spiritually, he would. Sorry Booster ilu! <3)

Instead, Dick instinctively deals with his inner turmoil like the TORTURED ACTION HERO he is: by punching things and brooding and yelling and joining the mob and sleeping on rooftops and going on obsessive secret missions and acquiring Angsty Stubble!! Just like Batman!

(Technically I don't know if Bruce ever joined the mob but you know he would.)

Anyway as you know this is my favorite continuity and I am poking fun affectionately, but uh, yeah sdfsfdsfs. No stuffed animals.

Post-2011 / Infinite Frontier / Wayne Family Adventures: stuffed animals, yes or no?

tl;dr it's in WFA! Probably not anywhere else, but it could be.

Post-2011 stuff tends to be cutesier overall, most of all in the current Infinite Frontier era. So I don't feel like this would be tonally out-of-line with IF comics. Taylor tends to go for more meme-y references rather than fanfic references, though.

So the obvious best fit is WFA, which is aiming for a rough approximation of Silver Age family-friendly vibes - wholesome, episodic plots, Teaching Good Moral Lessons For The Youth, etc. - plus lots of Easter eggs for fanfic readers and some comic references.

And look, here we are:

Aww.

Whew - that's everything I could find!

Anyway as you can probably tell, I LOVE the elephant, so this was a very entertaining rabbit hole to go down, thank you <3

[tommykinard6]

Mini rant here. Very mini, I have to sleep.

Buck only became a favorite character of mine in season 4. I liked him before, but I never got the hype of why everyone was all over him.

I hated how the Bddie fandom treated Buck. I started not being able to read a lot of fanfics because it was just too much to slog through the infantilization, the feminization, the worship that came at a detriment to the other characters and the rest of the fandom. The racism and villainizing towards Eddie was at a high in some fics because of the uwufication of Buck.

All I wanted was to read about Buck and Eddie (back then). All I wanted was to read about a 33 year old man, not a 33 year old man portrayed as no more than a 12-15 year old in emotional or mental maturity.

I thought that the BuckTommy side would be better. We’re older here (I say as one of the younger ones) and with a more general understanding of how adults behave. I thought it would be better. And it is. I know that I can freely read fanfics without as many filters as before.

But I’ve seen a fair amount of the same here. A lot of people just aren’t…normal about Buck.

I guess every fandom has their source of projection. Buck has a tractor beam on him for that, I guess.

He’s still infantilized so much in this corner of the fandom. And I’ve seen a lot of it hidden behind the term “brat”, a term that is used quite frequently concerning Buck. Now I personally hate it, but that’s just me. I don’t like the term because of what I found it represents.

Now this is not universal, of course. I still love the BuckTommy community and the creative works that come out of it are some of the best I’ve ever had the pleasure of enjoying. A fair amount of the creators that use the term “brat” still manage to make a well rounded adult in their works.

But I’ve also seen way too many people use it to mask the fandom-typical infantilization.

Typing this, I’m thinking of all the fandoms I’ve seen similar cases in.

Idk what the point of this even is. I’m not really trying to gatekeep what is and isn’t created or discussed in the fandom.

I’m just begging people to start treating Evan Buckley like the damn adult he is. It’s nauseating to read a fic where I’m ten years younger than Buck yet his emotional and mental maturity is on the level of that of my brother in his early teens.

[rabarbarzcukrem]

Ok so it's like.

The motorcycle scene: Touga is obviously imitating Akio and failing miserably. Represents an attempt at achieving maturity and adulthood through adopting empty symbols of power. Gives the impression of movement and progress, but in reality is going in circles. It gets faster and faster, there's a sense of danger and agitation. Touga is driving and Saionji sits in the sidecar, they're not on the same level and Saionji disapproves. Seems like they're heading towards some destination, but they're going nowhere.

The bike scene: A reference to their shared memories. Represents clinging to the past and trying to return to the time of childhood. The wheels may be turning, but the bike stands in place. It get slower and slower as Touga gets more tired until he finally stops completely. There's a sense of nostalgia and emotional fatigue. Touga is the only one pedaling, but Saionji doesn't comment on it (meaning that perhaps Touga being in control wasn't the problem in the first place. Maybe it was always about wanting to restore their lost connection and equal footing). They're facing opposite directions, but at the same time leaning on each other.

[nilesmoon]

one day we'll acknowledge that hajun has been accidentally given a very trans narrative and that "masculinity" plays a big role in the yeon plotline but idk if y'all are ready to have that conversation yet

edit I'm adding my tags & extra tidbit on chungsung from twit bc I've been thinking about it more

[feng-shui71]

has Jordan ever ate Wesker ass

what the hell, sure.

[carpethedamndiemdejavu]

"There is a crack, a crack in everything. That's how the light gets in." - Leonard Cohen

[lowpawly]

I think its kind of funny that straight men are completely out of tune with what women are actually attracted to but working perfectly in line with what other men are into. kind of sad

[theeternalwomb]

Maya Angelou says “A woman's heart should be so hidden in God that a man has to seek him just find her."

God to you and God to another may be different but God to those of who live our lives in such a way where all avenues connect and lead to God, to Spirit and to Divinity know that God and the divine is within all of us and we are tiny pieces to an entire universe. I describe the process of a woman protecting herself or putting herself on such a pedestal and in such high regard as her being able to make a distinction between the parts of herself that are to be gatekept and the parts of her that are her first line of defense and meet the world face to face. The most vulnerable, most heaven sent, most divine parts of your spirit are within you. Identify your worth and lead with an aspect of self that is meant to protect that vulnerable part of you from those who intend to take from or destroy you.

A simple way of describing this may be using the terms “light feminine and dark feminine” not in the sense of aesthetic differences or distinction but in the sense that within ourselves we hold energies that are better equipped to face the world and energies that are kept within us and reserved for places and times in which we are required to be our most vulnerable and open. Often times, as people and as women the parts of us that are equipped to face the world and the parts of us that are vulnerable and open we devote and dedicate to energies and individuals outside of ourselves. Both your energies, all of your layers, all of your gifts, all of your protection and strength belong to you and only to you first before they belong to anyone else.

Whomever or whatever God is to you, you are to yourself and so just as you receive God, worship God or love God, you should afford yourself the same privilege.

[junietuesday]

hardwon surefoot is the funniest bisexual character of all time to me bc jake seems fairly committed to playing cishet men. as in all his other pcs in naddpod are men who jump on opportunities to express attraction to female characters but not really male characters at all. but naddpod being as horny a podcast as it is murph will describe a male character and emily or caldwell will make the joke of him being hot and you can Hear jake jumping in as a comedian/improviser, only for like emily to go "hey. hey hardwon are you being fr right now" and murph to make the character earnestly match or even go above and beyond hardwon's accidental flirtatious energy. forcing jake to commit to the bit. which has resulted in hardwon kissing so many men in the show. even tho jake only ever initiates hardwon talking abt women- and even funnier more specifically Failing at talking to women. hardwon has had one singular girlfriend ever and completely bombed even the smallest of flirtations w every other woman hes been into. only one (1) time in the 99th episode out of 100 does hardwon kiss a woman or even have any sort of attraction reciprocated bc most of them think hes weird and lame. but not only has hardwon expressed physical attraction to an equal amount of male characters as female characters. he has successfully kissed several men and fully made out w i think at least two. happy pride month to hardwon surefoot specifically.

[wandering-alien]

'Oppenheimer' is actually a really interesting exploration into masculinity and gender. Bear in mind I've only watched the film once and my thoughts aren't entirely coherent but I wanted to share some.

Robert and Kitty's relationship is really intriguing and an insight into relationships and gender dynamics of the time. Kitty is suffocated by her kids and role as a mother but pushes through and sticks by Robert's side, not only because she's really loyal but because that's what women were expected to do. She's sacrificed a lot of her happiness and now her husband is a great man of history.

We see Robert Oppenheimer in a very emotional light, with close ups of Murphy's amazing acting really driving this home. It's good to see how someone in Oppenheimer's position would actually behave, and the stress and anxiety he feels is built into the film. At one point, Truman calls Oppenheimer a 'crybaby' and it really reminded me how important the obvious showing of Oppenheimer's emotions is in this film. Not only does it help us connect with him as a character, but it's acknowledging men's emotions and a fact that this male character can be and is vulnerable (which is an idea reinforced by the scenes in the board room).

Also just the general details, like the chemist arguing with another member of the team because he doesn't understand female anatomy and acts like she can't properly do her work. Really reminds you that it was a different time.

Sorry if none of this makes sense or if it seems a bit off, just what I took away from the film, especially because I saw 'Barbie' a few days before and that was very focused on gender as a theme.

[murrlizas-art-corner]

fem dazai as this sabrina rolling stone cover because I really wanted to draw her