#WHOOPS THIS WENT FASTER THAN I EXPECTED

[banannabethchase]

A Little Bit Camera Shy (But You're Still a Star) - also on AO3

~

Wheeler's never really thought twice about Danny streaming and filming his videos in their apartment. That is, until he posts one in Wheeler's bedroom.

~

Bingo square N3, complete! Title from Camera Shy by School Boy Humor. Shh leave me alone I love this song.

~

“Home,” Wheeler calls into the house. He yawns, stretching his arms above his head.

His roommate looks at him for a little too long, with that annoying pinched expression. “Cool,” Danny says, going back to his computer. “I gotta work tonight, so…” He trails off, an eyebrow raised.

“Right,” Wheeler says. “I kind of want to see a movie, anyway.”

He throws his stuff in his bedroom, bag bouncing. He’s dripping sweat, gross as hell, and will have to have a shower before doing anything else. The noises from Danny’s room are unmistakable. Whatever helps Danny pay his part of the rent, Wheeler tells himself. But he always feels…something, when he hears it.

The noises, the moaning, come through the walls as he showers. It’s not the first time he’s jerked off to hearing porn in the next room. Probably isn’t the last. He pretends it’s the same hearing it made as hearing it finalized. It’s not weird.

“Heading out,” Wheeler calls.

“Later!” Danny calls. He never uses Wheeler’s name when he’s streaming. Wheeler assumes it’s a courtesy.

He and Mox see Oppenheimer and he whispers historical context the whole time as Mox asks questions.

“Wanna get dinner?” Mox asks, lighting a cigarette as they leave the theater.

“Yeah, probably should,” Wheeler mutters. Danny usually only has to work, really work, two nights a week, but it’s usually a marathon of five or six hours. He came home in the middle of it once. He doesn’t feel comfortable repeating that experience. “Chili’s?”

“You have shitty taste in shitty food,” Mox says, blowing the smoke in Wheeler’s face. Wheeler kicks him in the shin, and then he’s in a headlock, and then he punches Mox directly in the ass. Mox yelps. “Hey! Be careful with the goods!”

“Like Claudio hasn’t already damaged the fuck out of those goods already,” Wheeler says with a grin, ducking Mox’s arm.

They get Olive Garden, because Mox said he was craving shitty pasta, and Wheeler brings back breadsticks, some salad, and a serving of pasta primavera for Danny along with the leftovers of his own meal.

“You ever gonna admit you like him?” Mox asks as they stop at Wheeler’s door.

Wheeler tries to kick at Mox’s knee, but misses, nearly dropping the bag of food. “Fuck off. Let me live.”

Mox shrugs. “Just saying. Me and Claudio danced around it for, like, five years. Don’t want you to make the same mistake.”

Wheeler wants to explain that the mistake, he thinks, would be ruining a clutch apartment with somebody who’s willing to pay extra for the third bedroom for his “office.” The mistake would be sticking his neck out and getting rejected by somebody whose face he sees every night before he falls asleep.

The mistake would be thinking it was possible.

“It’s not a mistake,” Wheeler insists. “It’s – pragmatic.”

“Prag – stop being all fancy, you dumbass.” Mox squeezes his bicep. “Love you. Later.”

Wheeler pushes open the door to their apartment. “Home again,” he yells, hoping Danny’s done with filming.

Danny peeks his head out from the bathroom, towel around his waist and looking better than should be allowed. Wheeler intentionally does not notice. “Oh, hey!”

“I got you dinner, if you want it,” Wheeler says. He sets it on the table. “Wrote your name on it and everything, but that’s mostly so you don’t eat my chicken parm.”

“That was one time!” Danny says, rolling his eyes. “But, uh. Thanks.” He flashes a smile toward Wheeler. “I appreciate it.”

~

It’s not even eight before Wheeler’s antsy and ready to be tired. But he’s wide awake, head spinning from the image of Danny in that towel burned in his mind and the conversation with Mox echoing in his head and, well.

He’s only a man.

His adventures on PornHub have changed drastically, now that he’s roommates with one of the most popular camboys. He skips past almost every video that has the word “twink” in it, almost every one that talks about jerking off alone. He knows that’s Danny’s wheelhouse, and Wheeler doesn’t want to know what Danny looks like when he’s…like that.

If Wheeler’s not the one making it happen, that is.

His face flaming hot, even in the privacy of his own home, he scrolls until he sees…

“Oh, you’ve got to be fucking kidding me.”

Getting off in my hot roommates bed while he’s out.

Wheeler’s smarter than this. Wheeler is not a man who pays a premium for porn, and is definitely not the kind that watches porn starring people he knows.

But this is Danny, in his bed, in a $8.99 video with so many hits it should be ridiculous.

He spends the money, because he has to know. He has to know.

He’s a few seconds into the video, Danny preening and looking infuriatingly good, when he notices something. “Wait a minute,” he mutters. He looks more closely. That’s – that’s his newest library book on the table. This video was filmed today.

“Son of a bitch,” he mutters. He stands up and throws open the door to his bedroom before he can stop himself, stomping into Danny’s office without knocking. “You!”

Danny looks up. “The fuck is wrong with you? I’m editing!”

Wheeler grabs him by the scruff of the neck and throws him down the hallway and into the bedroom. “This!” Wheeler says. “This is what’s wrong!” He gestures to the video. “Care to explain?”

“I knew you’d be mad!” Danny whines. He buries his head in his hands. “God, I’m sorry. Just. My followers have been asking about it, and I – I couldn’t resist.”

Wheeler’s face burns, and he pretends it’s with rage and not embarrassment. “Do they like the idea of you making fun of me or something?” He’s more hurt than he has any right to be. “Let me guess: you talk about how lame and stupid I am the whole time, so the people with humiliation kinks can get off on it.”

Danny’s expression changes, but not the way Wheeler expected. “Wait, what?”

“You probably come when you’re pointing and laughing at a picture of me or something,” Wheeler grumbles.

“You didn’t watch it.” Danny’s eyes widen. “You don’t – you fucking idiot.” He grabs Wheeler’s computer and turns it around. “Sit down, you stupid fuck.”

Wheeler lets himself be thrown into the chair, because he’s still reeling from the reaction. “If this is because you think I get off on getting made fun of, you’ve got the wrong guy.”

“Watch,” Danny says, “the stupid fucking video.”

With an eye roll, Wheeler presses play.

Danny comes into frame a little hesitant, a little shy. It’s nothing like the guy Wheeler argues about the light bill with. This Danny is cute, almost, curled in on himself, like he isn’t six feet tall and shredded.

“Hey, everybody,” Screen Danny says. “Um, so, this was, like, super requested. I did a poll on OnlyFans, and this got 56% of the vote out of 5 different options.” He laughs a little, smiling as he rubs at the back of his neck. Wheeler hates how good Danny is at this, and hates how his dick perks up. “This is his bedroom.”

He gestures around, then settles onto Wheeler’s sheets gently. He smooths his hands.

Wheeler hits pause. “Did you use my fucking desk as a tripod?”

Danny shrugs. “It was easier than risking leaving marks in the floor with my actual tripod, okay?”

“Yeah, making it available on PornHub really kept it discrete,” Wheeler mutters. Against his better judgement, he hits play.

“Y’all are probably already laughing at me,” Screen Danny says, breathy. His hands fist in Wheeler’s comforter. “He’s so cute though, guys. So cute.” He bites his lip, takes a deep breath. “God, the things I want him to do to me in this bed.” He visibly swallows, then kicks his socked feet up on the bed, sliding them on the comforter. Wheeler tries to will away his now very insistent boner.

“He’s got these abs,” Danny says, stretching out on the bed. He tilts his face to the pillow, and inhales. “He smells so good, all the time. But I shouldn’t.” He goes sheepish as he looks into the camera, fluttering his eyelashes. He glances at the door. “Well, he is at the movies. Earlier, he went to the gym, and came back…God.” He runs his hands down his neck. “He stays there for ages. It’s why he looks so goddamned good.” He glances at the door again, almost coquettish, then teases his thumbs in the waistband of his grey sweatpants.

Wheeler looks over. The same grey sweatpants the actual Danny is wearing right now.

“Are – are you already pitching a tent over a porn of yourself?!” Wheeler asks.

“Fuck you,” Danny says, but he blushes neon pink, and Wheeler hates how good it looks. He turns back to the screen, where Screen Danny has his sweatpants down his hips, hard, red cock curving upward, a shimmering wetness at the tip.

“I wanna suck his dick,” Danny murmurs, eyes shutting. Always the professional, he slants sideways to give the best view of him and his dick. “I want him to fuck my face so good I can’t talk the next day.” He makes eye contact with the camera and shows off, licking his hand.

Wheeler should hit pause. He doesn’t need to see more.

But he always loves to know how every movie ends.

“Danny,” he says, voice lower than he plans. “I bet you fucked yourself on your fingers on my bed, didn’t you.”

Danny burns even redder. “Um. Keep watching.”

Screen Danny strokes his cock a few times, enticing moans and whimpers from his lips. Wheeler grips the arms of his office chair.

“But even more than that,” Danny says, voice breathy and excruciatingly sexy, “I want him to fuck me. I pretend, sometimes.” He rolls over, ass to the camera, and Wheeler’s breath catches somewhere in his throat. There’s the base of a plug visible, bright pink. “I pretend this is him.” Danny turns back to the camera. “It’s not enough, though. It’s not as good as he’d be.” He reaches behind himself and pulls the plug out slowly, pushing it back in as his eyes flutter closed. He hums, the prettiest little smile on his lips. He drags the plug all the way out. “I know he’d give it to me good and hard.”

Wheeler pauses the video and spins in his chair to see Danny, standing in front of him, playing with his fingers. “Did you come?”

Danny freezes. “What?”

“Did you come in my room?” Wheeler asks. His heart is hammering.

Danny nods.

“Where?” Wheeler asks.

“On – on your bed,” he says. “All over myself.”

“D-did you have the plug in?” Wheeler doesn’t know why he keeps asking questions. He just knows he needs the answers.

Danny nods, and takes a half step closer to Wheeler.

“Did you pretend it was me?”

Danny leans across Wheeler and fast forwards the video, showing the end. Danny, flat on his back, comes all over himself crying Wheeler’s name, some landing on the sheets. Danny’s fucking himself so roughly with the plug that final spurts of come dribble out onto his stomach, his feet planted firmly on Wheeler’s comforter.

“Sorry,” he says, grinning at the camera, blissed out. “Kind of missed the money shot, but I got into it.” He blinks slowly. “I hope this met your expectations!” He blows a kiss to the camera. “See you later.” He winks, and the camera cuts to black.

Wheeler swallows hard. “You left come stains on my bedsheets.” He turns to Danny and stands. “You fucked yourself with a plug and pretended it was me.”

Danny nods. “I know it’s weird. I can look for another place if you want. I can –”

Wheeler doesn’t let him finish, and stands. He hauls Danny in, crushing their mouths together. Danny makes a whine so needy it’s closer to a mewl, and Wheeler walks them backward until the backs of Danny’s knees hit the bed. “You like me,” Wheeler says, pulling away, lips still so close to Danny’s they brush with every word. “You like me so much you got off in my bed and made a whole video about it.”

“It’s not just that,” Danny says, lower lip brushing Wheeler’s. “I talk about you. In – in my videos. People ask me to talk about you. They say I – they say I look better when I come when I’m thinking about you.”

Wheeler hauls him in again, but then shoves Danny onto the bed, covering his body. Danny’s hands are greedy and demanding. Wheeler can’t get enough of it, running his hands along Danny’s hot, soft skin. He slides his lips to Danny’s jaw, to his neck, nipping gently.

“Tell me what you like,” Wheeler says. “Like you do in the videos, baby. How do you look prettiest? How do people like you the best?”

“When it’s you,” Danny gasps. “Only – always when it’s you. Wheeler.” Wheeler pulls back at the tone in Danny’s voice to see him looking earnest and open. “Work isn’t anything compared to – to this. Compared to the real thing.”

It’s too much for him to handle. He kisses Danny again, trying to explain everything in his head that he can’t yet say, throwing clothes about the room. Their dicks slide together and Wheeler moans, hungry, into Danny’s mouth.

“Tell me what you want,” he demands, sliding his hands down Danny’s perfect body. “Tell me everything.”

“Fuck me,” Danny pleads. “Fuck me better than that plug. Fuck me like you mean it.”

“I mean it,” Wheeler promises. He fumbles in his bedside drawer. “You borrowed my lube?”

“I – it happens later in the video,” Danny says, looking almost cute with the embarrassment. “The stream loved it.”

“I bet they did.” Wheeler slicks up his fingers and shifts so he can throw Danny’s legs over his shoulders. “Okay?”

“Only if you get in me in the next five seconds,” Danny says, and Wheeler chuckles at how he can still be this infuriatingly demanding like this.

Wheeler slides a finger between Danny’s cheeks, pausing at Danny’s hole. “Pretty,” he murmurs, staring down at Danny’s face and he traces the rim. “So many people get to see it, but I get to do it.”

Danny whimpers. “Please, Wheels,” and the nickname is new. Wheeler circles his finger until he’s knuckle deep into Danny, reveling in the keening noises.

“Bet they love it when you make these sounds,” Wheeler mutters, pumping his finger slowly in and out. “Bet they wish they could make it happen. But it’s me, right?”

“Always been you,” Danny says, rolling his hips. “Fuckin’ – you come home from the gym, all sweaty. Want you on me.” His eyes literally roll back in his head as Wheeler scissors in another finger.

“I thought that was a porn thing,” Wheeler says. “Like – you actually do that because it feels good?”

“You have no idea,” Danny pants. “I – fuck.”

Wheeler crooks his fingers up, and Danny shouts. “Bet your plug can’t do it like that.”

“Now you’re just being a dick about it,” Danny says, but his eyes are still all unfocused and zoned out. “If you don’t get that dick in me…”

“What?” Wheeler asks, but he fucks his fingers into Danny with more intent, more speed. “Will you use the plug and know it’s not as good as me? Will you record yourself coming with my name coming out of your mouth?”

“Done that already,” Danny says.

“I – fair point.”

“I’m ready,” Danny says. “I promise, I know my body. You can fuck me now. Please fuck me now.”

“Are you sure?”

Danny’s face immediately goes all bitchy, like when Wheeler forgets to soak his mac and cheese pans in the sink. “Are you seriously asking the camboy if he knows when he’s ready to take a dick?”

Wheeler rolls his eyes and throws one of Danny’s legs down, angling his body to where he wants him. “You’re somehow even more annoying when I’m about to fuck you.”

“Then fuck me and maybe I’ll say nice things again,” Danny says, tilting his head all bitchy.

Wheeler goes easy into him, despite Danny’s insistence. He hasn’t done this in a while, and not – not when it feels this important, when it feels like it matters. Danny’s strangely quiet, eyes locked on Wheeler’s.

“Are – is this okay?” Wheeler asks. He pauses. “You’re not making any noise.”

“Is that – do you want me to?” Danny asks.

“I just assume, from the video,” Wheeler explains. He rolls his hips, settling in. It feels like he belongs here. “And from, uh. When you’re working when I’m home.” He’s not sure why saying that makes him a bit embarrassed, even as he’s inside of Danny. “You make a lot of noise.”

“I make a lot of noise for the camera,” Danny says, eyes sweet. “But – for real, I…” He trails out, reaching up to tangle fingers with Wheeler. “I don’t know.”

“That’s okay,” Wheeler says, and he tries pulling back a little and pushing slowly back in. “Anything you want to do.” And he means it. “Well, okay, except for playing shitty music loudly at 3 in the morning.”

“Fuck off,” Danny says, grin a little blissed out. “K-Pop is awesome. You wish you were as cool as Lisa.”

Wheeler decides that, if he fucks Danny good enough, he might shut up. He’s right. Danny makes the tiniest, most kitten-like noises, sweet and soft and sticking to Wheeler’s heart like glue. This is special, he realizes, a version of Danny his subscribers don’t get to see.

They don’t get to see the way Danny’s eyes go when they meet Wheeler’s. They don’t get to feel the tight, warm heat of Danny’s body. They don’t get to feel Danny’s fingertips dig into their skin, or the way Danny rolls his hips up to take more of Wheeler’s cock.

They don’t get to ask, “Can – can I come in you?” and be the recipient of the most needy, insistent, “Yes.”

They don’t get to reach down and, finding Danny’s cock slick with precome already, stroke him until he’s coming and whimpering Wheeler’s name like it’s all he knows.

They don’t get to come so far inside of Danny they feel like they’ll stay there forever.

Wheeler’s breathing is so heavy he’s dizzy as he drops his head to Danny’s chest, feeling Danny’s hands come up and stroke his back.

“So, that just fulfilled, like, eight fantasies,” Danny murmurs. He starts running his fingers through Wheeler’s hair, so gently it’s almost too much.

“I don’t think I knew I had them, but ditto,” Wheeler says into Danny’s skin.

The reality of this, what it means, shifts along with Wheeler as he settles back, feeling cold as he loses the close skin contact. “It’s not cool to ask this,” he begins, already regretting his opening, “but, um. What’s this mean?”

To his surprise, the openness is still there in Danny’s face. “You want me honest?”

I want you always, Wheeler finds himself thinking. Instead, he nods.

“I want to do this again,” Danny says, slowly, like he’s carefully choosing his words. “And – and I want it to mean something.”

Wheeler relaxes. “I think I do, too.”

~

The next few weeks are the weirdest of Wheeler’s life. Apparently, with the way he talks about Danny, his friends thought they were already fucking. Danny’s dad said, “Fucking Christ, finally,” when they told him over FaceTime, and Wheeler’s parents asked, “Does this mean you’ll have space for our extra Christmas decorations when you move into the same room?”

“Have we just been secretly dating for, like, months now?” Wheeler asks, adjusting the poster of Blackpink that now resides next to the Weezer one that has to be moved a bit to the side to make it all balanced, according to Danny. “Nobody seems surprised.”

Danny shrugs, scrolling his phone on Wheeler’s bed. On their bed, Wheeler giggles. God.

“Oh, shit,” Danny says. “Wait. Okay, so, you know how we talked about making it official on my channel?”

Wheeler nods, moving Danny’s dresser a little to the right. Perfect. “Yeah? Are they being weird?”

“They want to see you,” Danny chuckles. “Like, meet you or something.”

Wheeler turns around, trying not to feel panicked. “I –”

“I already told them no,” Danny says. “You’re just the roommate on there – our real life doesn’t come to work.” He gets the kind of smile that usually means he’s about to go down on Wheeler in the middle of the movie theater or ride him while he plays Dead Cells. “But, um. How would you feel about being an off-camera talent?”

“Director?” Wheeler asks. “I’m listening.”

~

“Hey, everybody,” Danny says. He’s fully dressed, but Wheeler’s behind the tripod. “Guess who’s here.”

“Voice only,” Wheeler says. “But yeah, it’s me.” He winks at Danny over the camera. “Roommate turned boyfriend.”

Danny rubs the back of his neck. “We figured he could, uh. Be a bit of a director today. Choose which recommendations y’all throw out.” He throws a devastating smile at Wheeler. “Maybe make some calls himself.”

“What can I say?” Wheeler says, and his heart swells with the way Danny’s looking at him. “I love telling him what to do.”

~

Mini Playlist:

Do I Wanna Know - Arctic Monkeys

PLEASE - Omido, Ex Habit

Start a Fire - Ryan Star

Camera Shy - School Boy Humor

[a-killer-obsession]

Whoops, you got hit by a bus, and now you're in the world of One Piece. But not everything is quite as you remember it...

General Tags: afab reader, she/her reader pronouns, isekai, monsterfucker reader, vampire!kid, werewolf!killer, wyrm!heat, minotaur!wire, everyone has a human form, smut heavy, unhealthy relationships, dubious consent, serious violence, spoilers for Wano arc, starts pre-timeskip. There will be a lot of more intense kinks, please check AO3 for all current tags.

Chapter 8 - Wire's Turn

Sabaody continued.

WC: 3.5k

Masterlist | AO3 | Chapter 1

“Hurry the fuck up,” Wire growled, tugging on the chain leash that was attached to your metal collar. At least it wasn't explosive, small victories. You could only hope it would stay that way.

“I'm trying!” You pouted, practically jogging to keep up, “not all of us are eight feet tall!”

“You're not that much shorter than me,” Killer pointed out, “but I'm having no trouble.”

“I have a misleadingly long torso!” You whined, “I've only got little legs. Carry me if you're so bothered, I can't walk any faster, I'm basically running as it is.”

Wire grabbed you unceremoniously and threw you over his shoulder, making Killer snort a laugh as you squeaked in surprise. You crossed your arms against Wire's back with a pout, poking your tongue out at Killer walking behind as his shoulders shook with silent laughter. “I feel like a hunted deer,” you commented.

“Shut it or I'll drop you,” Wire replied flatly. You looked at the eight foot drop to the ground and quickly decided against that.

“Please don't,” you whispered.

You took some time to enjoy the view from all the way up there, finally taller than pretty much everyone around you. Killer's mask bobbed side to side, taking in the locals as well, while also no doubt staying on guard for potential trouble, considering where you were. For the “criminal” area of the archipelago, the town was pretty nice. Sure it was clear that most of the people here were more colourful than the usual Sabaody resident, and obviously on the rougher side. You saw a great deal of women, and the occasional man or child, wearing explosive collars, often being led by chains not dissimilar to your own.

The children were the hardest to look at, all clearly emaciated and abused. Your grand hope was that Luffy would become King of the Pirates and destroy the Red Line and all the disgusting pigs that lived in Mariejois on top, and put an end to this horrid human trade. If things went wrong and Kid decided to get rid of you, you desperately hoped Killer would take ownership of you. At least then you could expect the bare minimum care, though you still weren't sure if Killer would be the type to hit you. He was your favourite so you hoped not. Then again, Heat seemed like the type who couldn't hurt a fly, and yet you knew he burned people to death on a regular basis, a truly gruesome way to die. You tried not to think too hard about how many people Killer had murdered to get his epithet, or how many people had been impaled on the forks of the trident held only inches to your left.

Sabaody was certainly an amusing place. It was just as pretty in person as it had been in the anime, with the ground and bubble based structures all shimmering with a pretty iridescence, making everything sparkle. Bubbles floated from the ground and drew your attention to the giant trees surrounding you that formed the island, with their pale blue-grey striped trunks and vibrantly green leaves. Rays of light broke through between the trees, giving the whole archipelago an almost ethereal look, Killer's hair often glowing like he had a halo as he passed through the rays. You wondered if he knew how attractive he looked like that, with his cool fringed jeans and button-down shirt, opened to the chest to show off his muscles. It was a real shame he'd get rid of these clothes at some point in the next few years. Now there's a thought, I mean you'd confirmed it now that you'd seen him naked, but before you came here - when this world was still just fiction - what proof did you have that his arm hadn't always been scarred? It'd never even occurred to you now that he wore long sleeves, he could have been hiding those scars all along. Now that you were here though you knew that whatever caused that injury was still to happen. There was the comment Kid had made in Udon about one of Big Mom's pirates hurting one of his friends, maybe the burns would come from Charlotte Oven and his heating ability.

“Where are we going anyway?” You asked curiously. The commanders had already found an inn for the night and dropped off their stuff, as well as heading to a few different weapons stores to stock up, and cashing in some looted treasure for berri. Most supplies for the ship were taken care of by the lower ranked crewmates, which meant this was likely a personal trip.

“None of your business,” Wire huffed.

“Wire's just embarrassed cos his cocks too big for regular condoms,” Killer chuffed, “we're going out tonight, gotta be prepared.”

“Wait, so we're going to an adult store?” You perked up, “fun!”

“Don't get excited, we're not wasting any berri on you,” Killer spat back, making you pout. Still, you were curious to see what sort of things were available in this world. Sabaody was a hub city, you had no doubt it would have a wide range of the things available in this world, especially in this shadier area. You wondered what sort of toys were popular here, and what sort of technology they had. Did One Piece have vibrators? Suction toys? Remote controlled toys? Did they utilise den-dens? Now there was an intriguing prospect. Was it morally grey to use a snail for that?

“How big can it possibly be anyway?” You pondered aloud, “I thought those XL condoms were a marketing scam, I mean have you seen how big regular ones can blow up?”

“They break easier if they're too small,” Wire replied frankly, “I ain't risking that with random whores.”

“If you're so desperate for a lay why haven't you just fucked me?” You asked him, “My legs are wide open baby.” Wire was the only commander who hadn't taken advantage of your presence on the ship, in fact he'd barely interacted with you at all outside of Kid ordering him to jizz on you.

“You couldn't handle me,” Wire said smugly.

“What, I can take Kid's soda can cock but not you?” You asked.

“I'm bigger,” Wire replied with a cocky tint to his voice, “did you not see?”

“She was a little preoccupied,” Killer smirked.

“Someone was gagging me with his cock,” you frowned.

“And you loved every second of it, didn't you?” Killer teased, and you poked your tongue out at him again.

“Maybe if you're a good girl today I'll let you try,” Wire promised, “but don't come crying to me if you get hurt. I warned you.”

“Bet,” you smirked as Wire put you back down, “I'm not some inexperienced little virgin. I can take it.”

“We'll see,” Wire mumbled, coming to an open door that led to a stairwell, apparently the store was upstairs. There was only minimal signage outside, but once in the stairwell it was obvious what sort of store you were ascending to, the walls plastered with various posters of sexy, barely dressed - sometimes entirely nude - models advertising various products. There was even a sign that read ‘pets welcome’ with a stick figure pictogram of a human with a collar and leash. Ironic. The shop attendants would probably think Wire was your dom, not that you were opposed to that.

The shop held all the usual things you would expect; dildos, lingerie, anal play toys, lubricant, porn, basic BDSM gear. But there were things that you definitely didn't expect as well. For one, less vanilla dildos like the style you'd used on Killer seemed to be common, as well as many other monster themed dildos that you would more expect to have to buy online in your own world. There were all sorts of them, some you recognised that looked like Heat's, some even in pairs like his, others that looked like horse or cow, advertised as minotaur themed. You wondered if this was an effect of not having the internet here, whether it was easier in that case to just sell more exotic items in store, or if it was a result of being in a particularly shady area. There was a whole display of what you recognised to be dials, with a big cardboard cut out of some beautiful woman with purple hair in space buns, a strange visor, and barely any other clothing, advertising that these dials stored vibrations.

Wire selected his condoms fairly quickly but continued to peruse the store, so you followed him around, not that you had much choice as he tugged at your leash whenever you paused for too long. The store worker and other customers didn't even blink an eye at him leading you around, or your bound wrists. Killer was already off looking at the porn when Wire made his way to that section, and you were curious to see what sort of kinks were popular here. Once again you were suprised by the amount of monsterfucker targeted items, with magazines that featured all sorts of creatures on the front, often entangled with humans. It was strange how very photo realistic they were, were they just very good at costumes and special effects makeup in this world? You didn't think they had CGI here, because surely that would require computers. Maybe they were devil fruit users? Minks?

You picked up a magazine that intrigued you, the cover featuring a human woman not dissimilar looking to yourself, with a large werewolf and minotaur either side of her. You flicked through the pages looking at the various poses they put her in, quite impressed at the size of their cocks and how realistic they looked, surely they couldn't be dildos? They must be devil fruit users. The centrefold was an extra long page that could be flipped down, and you gasped as it revealed a almost to life scale image of the minotaur's massive cock.

“Oi, no free reads,” the shop attendant yelled from the counter, “either buy it or put it back.”

Killer and Wire both took note of the magazine you were holding and exchanged a look. “She'll buy it,” they both said in unison, making you extremely confused.

“What… but…” you stuttered as Wire took the mag from you, “I thought you weren't spending money on me?”

“We're making an exception,” Killer said quickly.

“Oh… okay,” you replied, still very confused.

The boys paid for their things and dragged you back out of the store, Wire putting you back over his shoulder to walk faster. “You liked that mag then?” Wire asked. Weird thing to ask when he'd already bought it for you.

“If you're asking if I'm a monsterfucker, or interested in fucking werewolves and minotaurs,” you replied, “my answer would be a resounding yes. You should see some of the dildos I have back home.”

“Interesting,” Wire hummed. Perhaps you could take him after all, if you were used to that sort of size. The thought of burying himself in you made his cock twitch, finding someone who could take him was a rarity, especially human. That's why he usually turned to professionals who knew their limits, no fucking around only to be disappointed when they tap out. It was unfair really that he hadn't gotten a chance to destroy your cunt, and with the clock ticking on your story being proven true or false, he might not have much time left to try you out before inevitably sold you off. Being from another world was a insane excuse for Wire, he didn't have a single inclination that you were telling the truth, but that didn't mean he wouldn't fuck you while he could. Making a snap decision he carried you to a nearby alleyway, still in broad daylight and in full sight of those walking past but he didn't give a shit. This was normal for this zone anyway, there were no kids in this area and besides, he'd seen at least three other couples going at it on the way here.

Killer followed you both into the alley and stood knowingly on watch towards the end, knowing full well what Wire wanted as the tall man put you back on your feet and rested his trident against the building. “Wire?” You asked hesitantly as he spun you to face the wall, “Oh,” you squeaked as he pushed his growing erection against your ass, pulling your hips away from the wall so he could unfasten your shorts. “Right here?” You questioned nervously, looking at all the people passing by at the end of the alleyway as he worked your shorts and panties down till they pooled at your ankles.

“Right here,” Wire confirmed, “you said you could take it, right? Don't come bitching to me if I hurt you.”

“You won't,” you replied confidently, the allure of being fucked in such a public area already making you wet. Wire grinned coyly as he pushed his fingers between your legs and felt your arousal.

“Dirty whore,” he purred, “so fucking wet already, I bet you'd let me fuck you in the middle of the street if I wanted.”

He wasn't wrong, but you didn't have time to respond before you were biting back a moan as his long fingers entered you, going straight to two of them. Wire knew exactly what he was doing, zeroing in on your g-spot while his other hand reached around your front to play with your clit as he worked at stretching you. He found it surprisingly easy to work you open to a third finger, your slick coating his fingers as your pussy tried to suck them in. His fingers were so long he may as well been fucking you with a dildo, and with the added simulation on your sensitive bud and the risk of being out in public, barely hidden in the alleyway by a watchdog Killer, it didn't take long for your pussy to clench around Wire's fingers. Your knees shook as you came, clawing at the brick wall of the building you were pinned against with a choked moan.

“Good whore,” Wire hummed, removing his fingers from your cunt and wiping them on your shirt, “now get on your knees bitch, this dick isn't gonna suck itself.”

Wire let go of your leash but as it landed he stood on it purposefully, pinning it beneath his boot and forcing you downwards by your collar. Your panties were still around your ankles as you knelt, and your mouth watered as Wire unfastened his tented shorts, pulling his impressive cock free.

“Oh fuck,” you gasped as you set your eyes on it. He wasn't fucking around, he was big. There was no fucking way you could take all of him in your mouth, and you had doubts that he'd be able to fit all of it inside you either.

“Change your mind already?” Wire chuffed.

You pouted at him out of feigned hurt before eagerly bringing your bound hands up to grasp him, unable to reach a single hand around his shaft. You stacked them one above the other to cover as much surface as possible while your tongue came out to lick the head of his cock, running your muscle over the smooth skin and up the underside of his shaft, letting the tip of your tongue slide along the slit. You did what you could to try and fit him, barely taking a quarter of him in your mouth before you were gagging, the corners of your mouth stinging from the stretch. Wire took your hair and wound it around his wrist to hold your head, making shallow thrusts into your warm mouth that made your eyes water as he pushed even deeper.

“There's a good whore,” he praised, “gag on it sweetheart, let me see those pretty tears.”

You took as much as you could into your throat, unable to take more than half of him even as your throat bulged and you struggled to control your gag reflex. There was no hope of breathing with him in your throat, his cock so thick that you felt like you were truly choking. He was clearly used to this though, giving you plenty of opportunity to catch your breath while drool ran down your neck.

“That'll do,” he said flatly, like he was bored, “stand up and take your shorts and panties the rest of the way off.”

You obediently did as he asked, noticing as you stood how people walking past would occasionally stop and try to watch, quickly deterred by a quick threatening whizz of Killer's punishers to encourage them to move along. You slipped your shorts and panties past your shoes and Wire picked you up like you weighed nothing, wrapping your legs around his hips and holding you far off the ground with your back pinned to the alley wall. His heavy cock was pinned between your stomachs as he rut the base of it against your mound. You whined in need, trying to roll your hips to rub your clit against him.

“Last chance,” Wire warned, “it's not too late to admit defeat “

“Give it to me,” you begged, “please Wire, fuck me, I want your massive cock stretching me open.”

“Alright then,” Wire smirked, pleased with your begging, and lifting you higher to line his tip up with your slick entrance, “don't say I didn't warn you.”

He watched smugly as he sank you down on his cock and your face contorted as you bit back the urge to scream. The stretch was almost too much, but it wasn't the first time you'd experienced such a large intrusion, having dildos back home that were about his size. Soon the pain melted to pleasure, but as you had guessed, he was unable to sheath himself entirely before you were gripping his shoulder painfully tight, warning him that you'd hit your limit as his tip bullied against your cervix.

“Fuck, look at you,” Wire praised, leaning back a little so he could admire the way your abdomen bulged. No human could take all of him, but he was thoroughly impressed with how much you had managed to take. “What a good girl, I'm gonna enjoy ruining this cunt.”

Not wanting to waste his time, he started a brutal pace, your overstuffed cunt making obscene sounds as Wire made quiet grunts and used you. You looped your bound wrists over his head and clawed at his back, burying your face in his cloaked shoulder to muffle your moans as your body was bounced up and down. You would no doubt have scratches all over your ass after this from the brick wall, overly thankful that he'd at least let you keep your shirt on to protect your back from the rough surface. Wire's hands holding you by your ass at least protected you a little. With his body so close to yours there was a slight grind against your clit every time he thrust up into you, raising and lowering you in time with his movements to get as deep as he could, showing off his incredible strength and control as he continuously avoided smashing into your cervix. The way he stretched and filled you meant every sensitive spot inside you was being rubbed against, your entrance stretched to its limit around him. With all that stimulation it didn't take long for him to have you close to your peak again, crying into his shoulder at the overwhelming pleasure as he used you like a ragdoll.

“Mmmph,” you mumbled into his shoulder, leaving a wet patch on his cloak from your combined tears and drool, “cu-cumming!”

There was a pattering of fluid hitting the concrete pathway below you as you gushed on Wire's cock, and you let out a stuttered whine that caught the attention of a few passersby that Killer had to clear away. “Good girl, mouse,” Wire praised, not letting up for a moment, still chasing his own high, “gonna cum soon too.”

Wire pulled out and put you back on your feet, pulling your arms over his head to unhook you but holding you under an armpit to keep you upright, unbelievably shakey on your legs from the hard orgasm. He pulled up your panties up most of the way with his other hand before jerking himself off, cumming with a grunt into the gusset of your underwear. The hot white fluid was thick against the fabric and you whined as he pulled your panties the rest of the way up, making the fabric stick to your cunt. He pulled up your shorts as well, fastening them before throwing you back over his shoulder. He spanked your ass as he made his way out of the alley, but you were too tired to respond, now truly looking like a hunted deer as you went slack over his shoulder.

“We're done here,” Wire stated as he passed Killer. The shorter man huffed a short silent laugh and followed on behind, not at all surprised to see you had already fallen asleep on Wire's shoulder.

[Next Chapter]

Like my stuff? Consider buying me a ko-fi

Taglist: @chershire23 @tremendoushorsepatrolgoth @nocturnalrorobin @eyes-ofhell @hellcatsworld @miyomoko-sora @loserbee14 @tzimiscequeen-blog @lansy-4 @luvnistuff @bbnbhm @fanaticsnail @ocean-mochi @mikeyswifie @h0n3y-l3m0n05

[dilfl0v3rss]

boxer!todo who trains almost every damn day. always wanting to be at his top physique at all times.

boxer!todo who lets you come with him to every training session or workout at the gym so you don’t get lonely.

boxer!todo who is undefeated due to his raw strength and ability to adjust to anyone’s fighting style. he’s beaten men bigger and faster than him because he’s just that good.

boxer!todo who doesn’t allow you to come to some of his fights. not wanting you to see how gruesome it could get in the ring.

“papa why notttt” you whined, feet stomping on the ground as you followed your boyfriend around the house. “cause i can tell how it’s gonna go. ion want you seeing all the blood and bruises ma.” he said calmly as he bent down to grab a water from the fridge. “but he was talkin so much shit at the press conference. talkin bout how he’s the best and how you never gon amount to him. wish i could fuck that nigga up myself.” you mumbled your last sentence, making todo chuckle as he watched how upset you were getting. you took the insults worse than him, and he was the one getting them. “don’t worry mama ima whoop his ass. jus need you t’stay here when the day comes while i go handle my business, aight?”

boxer!todo who spends his day offs taking you out or chilling with you at home.

boxer!todo who spoils you rotten with most of his money. if there’s was something you liked, expect it to be at your doorstep within the next week.

boxer!todo who makes sure you always have a good view of him at the fights he lets you attend. loving how you scream for him when he does a move he’s been working on or how you’re quick to lift him up when he takes a particularly hard hit.

“cmon pa we eat those”

“you got it baby hit him in the body”

“focus todo! you not done yet!”

“uhh huhhh he can’t fuck wit you baby”

he loved hearing your pretty voice.

boxer!todo who made sure to give you a reward for keeping him in check during ever match.

“you my good little motivator ain’t you mama?” his thrusts were quick, large hand pressed down lightly on your stomach so he could feel himself moving inside of you. “mhmm. you d-did so good daddy” you moaned. todo smiled as he began fucking you deeper, making your back arch off the bed as he caressed your cheek with his other hand. “did good ‘cause i had you there to cheer me on. love makin my pretty girl proud. you proud of me ma? lemme hear you say it.” todo didn’t care about how anyone else felt about him, but you. always seeking your validation after a good fight. “m’so proud of you. there’s n-nobody better papa.” “uhh huh. nobody.”

boxer!todo who also fucks you so good when he’s not happy with his performance after barely winning a fight that should’ve been “light work” for him. feeling that since he couldn’t give his all in the ring he’ll make up for it in the bedroom.

boxer!todo who never went out partying after his fights. always choosing to relax at home with you rather than be in a room with a bunch of drunk guys and bitches with their asses out.

boxer!todo who has you wear his chain during every match. you bought him the chain as a gift when he won his first fight as a pro boxer. it wasn’t the most expensive, but it was still worth a lot. you saved up for months to get it for him and he almost cried when you showed it to him.

“you didn’t have to-” “yes i did. you been working so hard and you deserve it. gon be the best there ever was baby” todo’s eyes began to water as he let you put the chain around his neck. it fit nice, sitting right over his strong pecs. “cant wear it while i fight so ima need you t’keep it safe f’me. that okay ma?” you nodded your head before giving him a passionate kiss on the lips. “i don’t mind wearin it as long as you continue to think of me” todo smiled, wrapping an arm around your waist as he pulled your head into his broad chest. “always.”

boxer!todo who keeps a level head for most of his fights, never really letting the trash talk at the conferences get to him. he saw no point in trying to get a rise out of his opponent and felt that they should feel the same way, but they never did. there was only one time he let his anger take over and it nearly got him disqualified.

“a.t how do you feel about your ability to win this fight” the reporter said. todo kept his face serious as he thought about his answer. “well i been training real hard, learning some new skills. i feel like if i keep my head straight and fall through with my plans i should be able to win this thing.” he toyed with his chain as he spoke, not really thinking anything of this little event and just wanting to get home to his pretty girlfriend. the reporter asked his opponent the same question, and while he answered he noticed todo wasn’t paying attention to him at all. still playing with the gold around his neck. he noticed that it was the same chain he’d see you wearing when he would come to scout todo’s matches. a smirk planted on his face before he uttered something he’d come to regret. “yea i know ima win. and after i do, ima bring me a honey home. might even give his little girlfriend a taste since i heard she got a thing for winners.” loud gasps immediately filled the room as well as your living room while you watched the whole thing live on the edge of your couch.

everyone waited for todo to retaliate, but he didn’t. he kept calm as a small chuckle flew from his lips. holding his head down as he began to crack his knuckles. “we’ll see.” was all he said before the press moved on with their next question. everyone thought he was fine. his opponent even slumped down in his chair a little more as he thought his insult did absolutely nothing, but you knew the truth. todo only cracked his knuckles when he was angry. really angry. usually only doing so to keep himself from punching or breaking something. when he got home that night he acted as if everything was fine, but you could tell he thought about it all the time. by the way he’d hit the punching bag with a little more force than usual or how he nearly sent his trainer flying out the ring before walking towards his locker room. todo was pissed.

when the day came he made you promise not to come to or watch the fight. the seriousness in his tone made you worry, but you fell through with your promise because it meant so much to him. when todo came home it was a lot earlier than you’d imagine. his fights usually took thirty minutes to an hour, but at this rate his opponent couldn’t have lasted longer than the first round. “you win?” voice small as you watched your boyfriend quietly walk straight towards the bedroom. “mhm…” he walked into the room, closing the door behind him. you scrambled to your phone to see what could have him acting like this. a quiet gasp left your lips as you watched clips of the very short fight. like you thought, the poor guy didn’t last the first round. receiving blow after deadly blow from your boyfriend before eventually getting punched so hard in the face that he flew to the other side of the ring. “mama get in here! need you right now.” you smiled before taking a deep breath and skipping your way to your bedroom.

boxer!todo who fucked you the best when he was hot and jealous after a fight.

[spacebarbarianweird]

Astarion Dhampir Daughter Headcanon P.4

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

She always dresses like "this woman who has buried three husbands and is ready to bury the fourth one."

When she was a kid, Astarion would sew her dresses - they were supposed to be both practical and pretty, with a lot of hidden pockets.

Even though a few centuries old, Alethaine still carries her father's dagger in her boot (the one he gave her when she was 19).

She never allowed anyone to touch her silver waist-length hair.

Only Tav was allowed to brush and braid them.

When Tav died, Alethaine cut the hair short in grief.

Regretting it immediately since elven hair takes centuries to grow back.

They grew back faster than Alethaine expected, but to her own dislike, they weren't silver anymore. They were raven black, more suited for a dhampir.

For a decade, she lived in Dhampir Freehold, the city founded by the oldest of the Underdark spawns' children.

Unluckily, dhampirs are solitary creatures, and the history of the Freehold ended in worshipping abyssal demons and bloodshed.

Alethaine, having much better intuition and being a skilled necromancer, had managed to escape before things went south.

She has a living beating heart, but undead blood runs in her veins.

The blood which enables immunity to vampirism because no vampire would be able to feed on dhampirs.

Alethaine's blood smells like sagebrush.

Druidic protection circles and the divine light hurt her.

Along with the sun.

Of course, she can walk in the sunlight, but it makes her head hurt.

She is fluent in Abyssal but sort of didn't expect Abyss to answer back.

Blood is like a drug for dhampirs; it makes them strong but erases their humanity. Alethaine constantly fights the temptation to drink it.

Astarion eventually settled at the sea coast, managing his own piracy empire and being this "man in shadows" no one knows, but everyone fears.

He mostly did this to make sure Alethaine knew where to find him if she desperately needed him.

Because his "little princess" definitely would need her dad's help from time to time.

Despite being a High Elf, Alethaine believed she had no soul and would not be able to reincarnate.

To her own surprise, she met her thiramin, elven soulmate, her star-crossed love.

Erlen, the wood elf prince.

Who didn't expect to see the long-desired light in the eyes of gods damn dhampir.

It's a sin to separate thiramins, but his family decided better to do this than allow "foul vampiric blood" to poison their kin.

They put a spell on Erlen and locked him away and also casted a dozen protection spells, preventing Alethaine from rescuing him.

Well, too bad they weren't afraid to piss Alethaine Ancunin.

Because now they pissed her father.

Who is absolutely heartbroken seeing his daughter exhausted and desperate, begging him to save her love

Crying and cursing in his hands.

And Astarion has a pirate fleet who wouldn't mind whooping some elven asses.

Upon rescuing Elren, Astarion is suspicious of this wood elf he had never seen before.

What if he doesn't treat his daughter accordingly?

Only to realize that if Alethaine was his "princess," she would be the queen to her future husband.

"Just don't hesitate to ask me for help. I will gladly kill a couple self-confident elves for you two."

Alethaine called her firstborn daughter Tav.

Of course, it's a baby name and she will change it to a more appropriate one in a century, but for now, there is little Tav growing among the elves.

And Alethaine hopes she will be at least half as good a "monster" parent for her daughter as Astarion was for her.

[lazywolfwiccan]

Stiles Stilinski vs The Universe: PT 2

@axelwolf8109 @wendysbrassknuckles @greek-freak101 @epickiya722 @thebejeweledwatercat @sterekmpreg

Stiles dreamed about his dream guy for the next two weeks, every time he scowled at him with absolute contempt and ignored Stiles.

And yet he couldn't stop thinking about him. Stiles had been tasked with helping Isaac pick up some gaming guides at the library. The twenty year old went on and on about Bayonetta and Mario to the point Stiles thought that Isaac was making stuff up.

The two descended down the stairs, Stiles stopping in shock. His dream guy was right there!

He was handing a package to the lady at the front desk, a ghost of a smile on his perfect face, green hazel eyes sparkling, and of course the red streaks.

He looked up at Stiles who hid his face behind Isaac's many books. He softly laughed and skated away.

-----

"Why are we going to Theo's party, I hate Theo" Stiles whined. "I do too" Isaac whined identically. "Because he invited us and we need to relax before we enter this battle of the bands" Scott said.

Allison rolled her eyes, immediately going to get drunk. "This sucks!" Stiles yelled before running to find Liam Dunbar, Theo's boyfriend who knew everyone.

"Liam! Have you seen a guy? Hot, green eyes I wanna swim in and red streaks?" "Oh yeah, Derek Hale, he moved her from New York" Liam nodded sagely. "He's here" "What?!"

A spotlight might as well have Illuminated Derek leaning against a wall, looking uncomfortable. Stiles slid over to him.

"Hi" "Hey" God even his voice was hot!

Stiles resisted the urge to squeeze his muscles. "Are you gonna ask stare at me or?"

"How are you in my dreams?" Stiles blurted out. "Subspace, I work at Amazon, yours is the fastest way I can get to my deliveries. I forgot you don't have that in California"

"Wow" Stiles said dumbly. Derek laughed again. "Not gonna lie, you've grown on me a bit" "Uhhhhh" "You wanna get out of here?"

------

Derek used subspace to get Stiles to his house, holding him on his back.

"I can see why you like using that!" "Right? It's faster than a car" Derek took off his leather jacket. "Why'd you move from New York"

"Bad breakup, I have a lot of those unfortunately" He sighed, making a cup of peppermint tea. "You?" "Just one really, Lydia Martin" Stiles said sadly, expecting Derek to call him a liar like everyone else did.

"Well her loss" Derek shrugged.

Stiles gaped. "My ex girlfriend always said I move on too fast, in my opinion we can do whatever we want" Derek sat next to him.

Stiles stared into his green eyes, Derek cupping his cheek and kissing him. Stiles kissed back, not caring that they were moving extremely fast

------

Derek dropped Stiles back at his house. "Um, my band The Wolf Pack are playing tomorrow night at the Eclipse theater, you wanna come?"

"Sure, why not" Derek grinned. Stiles whooped when he got inside, not realizing the world of chaos he was about to face.

[jackfromthefairytale]

bad omens: concrete jungle [the ost] liveblog

whoop whoop I'm here we made it

C:\PROJECTS\CJOST\BEATDEATH: we got some noises? if I had more than half a braincell right now I might have tried to decipher it

v.a.n (w/ poppy): single. love the ambience in the verse, gives sci-fi/superhero specifically dark knight vibes. poppy's vocals, particularly the roboticness of them, fit very well, especially with the knowledge that this is a "character-focussed" song. idc what everyone else says this bangs

the drain (w/ health, swarm): single. industrial vibe, not the biggest fan of the guy's vocals but it does fit the mood. low-key wasn't expecting noah to start singing? tdopom vocal sample, nice touch. I quite like the intensity of the instrumental behind the whinyish vocals in the verse. outro is. ominous.

terms & conditions (w/ bob vylan): vibes. anti capitalist vibes. can you hear me through the white noise? yo the lyrical content in this? they really went there? I gotta check out this band

hedonist (recharged) (w/ wargasm): I haven't heard much wargasm but it checks out so far. drumming stands out on this one. god the breakdown starts stops gave me a heart attack. this is like if hedonist was a wargasm song basically

even: it's light? his vocals are quite nice here, ethereal. checked the credits and michael taylor is the only one other than noah credited and I can hear some chief influence in the vocal style. I'm not sure what the genre/style here is exactly but I vibe with it

loading screen: nick ruffilo song. nice soundscape with the synths and drums. really vibe with this. it sounds bright like a shopping centre at night but without the bad vibes. I want to live here

anything > human (w/ erra): most excited for this. that intro riff is!!! the glitchy effect on jesse's voice? is noah singing lower? is that jt? this second chorus is gooood. IS THERE ANYTHING MORE THAN HUMAN? BREAKDOWN!!! it's weird because it's quite obviously more a bad omens song than an erra song but it is very cure era erra at the same time? (dan braunstein I see you) but also it's like an undefined erra song? it's still Jesse Cash Guitar Work but ? bad omens ambience? bad omens production? bad omens structure, even? good old fashioned heavy song.

digital footprint: uhh this is 4 and half mins long? there's a breathing exhale sample on repeat. not vibing tbh.

nervous system (w/ iris.exe): production is great. oh the guitars kicking in! her voice is nice. this song is danceable. I'd listen to it more as a vibe/background noise than a focus song

C:\PROJECTS\CJOST\FINDPEACE: more noises

artificial suicide (unzipped) (w/ thousand below): it's fast. drumming is different?

the grey (unzipped) (w/ thousand below): it's pitched. the lower harmony is more pronounced. it's also faster. and the drumming is more pronounced. it's like a nightcore version? oh that instrumental bit! it scratches an itch actually.

the death of peace of mind (w/ we are fury): love this so far. beat drop at the chorus? loving this a lot. the choral effect on the second prechorus?

the death of peace of mind (w/ so wylie): single. a very different vibe to the other one, it's more direct to the original compared to the other one. it's also got less going on which is also quite effective. the bridge section is beautiful.

bad decisions (lofi) (w/ dahlia): definitely quieter. kinda sounds fundamentally the same but with a different lead vocalist. instrumental after the chorus changes. the whole machine trained voice is still not sold on me, the accent/voice has noticeable quirks from noah's voice on the original but it's still inconsistent and I find that uncanny. it is a vibe but again. not sold.

just pretend (credits) (w/ let's eat grandma, chief): oooh. not sure which of the girls is singing but she sounds good. has enough of a let's eat grandma flair in there. oh there's michael. their voices work well together. this sounds more let's eat grandma than chief tbh. sounds really good though. bridge filled with longing as it should be. I think noah may have rerecorded for the bridge the vocal pattern is a bit different. I love this

C:\PROJECTS\CJOST\CLEARMIND: more noises. there's definitely something to be deciphered

artificial suicide (live): cheering. it's got the intro monologue thing. mm that riff. better than studio. also it shows he's human with parts of the chorus.

like a villain (live): murder robot wife glados my beloved. jolly vocals! no band should ever sound this good live. this bridge sounds so good live, like you know something big is coming. (it's the breakdown). I love the falsetto on that last "hold on". outro riff?

the grey (live): my beloved.

what do you want from me? (live): zumba time (I'm literally in bed). mix is a lot clearer here than on the studio version thanks matt. does that chorus/main riff go lower in this live version then in the studio?

nowhere to go (live): that first verse stripped thing they do live is ethereal. folio is going off here (as always). I think the crowd need to be louder in this mix for the bridge

v.a.n (live) (w/ poppy): does not need to go this hard. noah's harmony in the verse with the vocal effect stands out straight away. that outro riff is so poignant here

the death of peace of mind (live): I haven't listened to this song in so long it goes so hard. intro sounds especially film soundtrack. is that saxophone (second chorus)? mm that breakdown.

just pretend (live): gonna sob I love this song I wrote a thoschei fic inspired by it. the crowd are living for this. those outro vocal bits! the crowd sounds are not going lol. emo acoustic alternate edition? help I might write that part two to that thoschei fic I had I mind 😭

this ended up a lot more developed than I thought it would

also go listen to cure by erra it bangs lol

k gnight

[momotonescreaming]

Just wanted to send a quick anon note of encouragement since it sounded like you needed it. I don't have any real advice on how to write faster or to be satisfied with your creations since I struggle with that too, but please know that you are already an amazing writer and the works you've shared (both finished and unfinished) have caused your readers to experience the full breadth of human emotions as they empathize with your characters.

Your stories are memorable, you give others great advice, you have amazingly well thought out analyses of character's motives, and we're all lucky to have you playing in our fandom-sandbox.

Again, this may not be that helpful, but if you're starting to fixate on one problematic part, remember that it's only one portion of the whole and your audience will never know that that section wasn't entirely to your liking. Taking a long break/sleeping on it could also help. You might think of better ways to phrase things when you're not obsessing over it or even just reading what you've written with fresh eyes might reveal that it wasn't as "bad" as you may have thought--you might even like it.

The key thing is to have fun creating, take a break if needed, and know with certainty that your writing already brings joy to so many people.

Kudos times 1000, because you deserve it.

Anon, you have me at a loss for words. I was not expecting to actually receive a comment or an ask or anything when I sent my vent post into the void, but I'm grateful you did 💜 I read your ask, slept on it, went to work, came home, and read your ask again. A part of me was tempted to keep it in my inbox, so I could go back to it whenever I needed.

Turns out I'm actually struggling a lot more with my writing than I thought I was, and then I was struggling with the fact I was struggling. Whoops 😅 So your ask came at just the right time. I really needed it anon, thank you 💜

It's really easy to forget that writing - especially fanfiction - is for fun and connection and not content. That I do this because I love it. And hearing that you, that other people actually like the things I create makes it all the better 💜I'm not just struggling only to shout into the void. Half the fun of fandom and fanfiction is connection, that there are other people out there on the same wavelength. That they like what I think and what I make. It's also nice to get a reminder that it's okay to take a break, to not rush. I can take my time. It's hard, to not give into the pressure and the worry about "keeping up" but I think I'm gonna try and find the fun again. Not to sound like a self help book or anything.

I think this is my sign I need to take a break, have a rest, and come back to writing with fresh eyes. I feel a little bit like a broken record here, but thank you 💜

[crystalelemental]

I feel kinda bad after shitting on Mina as being "Worse SS Kris," so let's try something a little different.  Mina, how do you do against Gauntlet?

General Overview To the surprise of no one, pretty well.  Defensive supports generally do really well for themselves when it comes to Gauntlet, and Mina is no exception.  She's incredibly hard to take down, boosting team defenses makes her allies quite sturdy, and the Buddy move as a sudden block against the threat of AoE Sure Crit is really nice.  And of course, having Flabbergast means she's a partial check to Uxie, who is a problem. Having the ability to cap special attack on turn 2, as well as supplying Team Sharp Entry, is also very nice.

That said, Mina does have drawbacks.  The biggest one being gauge.  She has Whimsical Acceleration, and you're gonna want that and Fairy Kingdom to sustain good gauge control in absence of someone buffing speed.  Sometimes even with those tools it's not quite enough to sustain.  Her constant need for sync is also a major problem, as it prohibits a lot of other sync nukers from doing their jobs.  Low DPS units just do not synergize well with Mina.  And of course, all special offense combined with "cannot set Rain more than twice" creates a lot of issues for Mina.  Like. I am not looking forward to Moltres.

Vs. Tapu Bulu Okay so maybe I overshot this one early on.  Initially I just wanted Blue, then realized I couldn't think of anyone else to bring.  This probably could've been a duo clear, nothing was stopping me but my own dislike of that.  So I brought Lodge Marnie, who helped clear faster, and added accuracy drops to the evasion play.  This was, again, perhaps a bit much.

Vs. Tornadus So I toned it down.  Persian debuffs attack to prevent Tornadus' Bar 2 AoE spam from being a problem.  Surge inflicts paralysis, and can take sync some of the time.  I mentioned Mina tends to hog it, but this is only true as far as needing her Buddy move open.  Most of the time, you want it used later on, to block a typical Bar 3 AoE Sure Crit, but beyond that, you can do whatever you want with sync so long as you're not in danger there.

Vs. Terrakion Giovanni is one of those sync pairs where Mina isn't, like, specifically built for him, but her tools optimize him well.  I opted for a Terrakion clear, initially thinking of having Janine debuff offenses for them so we didn't have to worry about field effects, before remembering that Mina is a field effect generator.  Whoops.  But hey, Giovanni gets to finish a fight with like full HP!  That's something!

Vs. Cobalion Okay I hate this one.  Eevee Lucas was chosen because I wanted to do the whole Poison/Burn interplay thing, but it didn't shake out that way, because it turns out Flannery can't take out a full HP bar in one sync.  Or even half of one.  Not that Lucas could either, but he came closer and had better follow-up DPS under Sun.  So I guess he gets the win.  Also Mina is Poison-weak, and Cobalion uses Poison Jab a lot.  This is another instance of "Really want the Zone up" because of Whimsical Immunity.  Without it, you're staring down a 30% chance to eat Poison.

Vs. Azelf Lusamine is pretty well-equipped to handle Azelf, and I admit to liking this a bit more than I should.  The real hiccup is that Lusamine doesn't buff physical attack, so the second half of HP bars is a little slow.  Parasect was here for matching theme skills, and for Screech to help solve the physical damage problem.  It went okay.  Mostly it's the bulk Mina provides that's surprising.  Ending on full HP was not something I expected.

Vs. Uxie Shauntal can cap her own crit rate, and Mina has Flabbergast, which means all you need is anything else with status and you're in business.  Shauntal has fantastic DPS for this fight.  The warning I will give, however, is that Mina's Flabbergast is random.  This means you can't count on it when you need it, and also that you can't attack and count on it not happening early when you need it not to.  Built-in Flabbergast across all attacks is like the bane of my existence when it comes to Uxie.  Sidney taught me the hard way that this is not conducive to checking its gimmicks.

Vs. Latios Look guys!  Lorelei and Pryce are good now!  Haha...haaaaah, no, not really.  I wanted to give this an attempt, to see if maybe they had good DPS synergy.  And they kinda do.  Lorelei's freeze chance isn't bad, and Pryce does get 160% bonus move damage when a foe is frozen.  Unfortunately...well, you know all the issues.  Ghetsis is a better freeze bot than Lorelei, freeze is too short lived for Pryce to really make much of it, they're both slow as hell being supported by a slow pair so gauges are a nightmare.  The whole thing is a disaster.

Vs. Latias And speaking of disasters!  I opted for Valerie as the damage dealer here, and made the absolutely moronic move to see if they could handle it with just the attack debuffing to stop Sure Crit Earthquake from  causing problems.  The good news: they can.  The bad news: this is incredibly slow, incredibly dangerous, and incredibly stupid.  None of this was a good idea, or particularly worth it.  Especially since you need to pop the Buddy move before Sure Crit Earthquake anyway, to offset the accuracy debuff.  It's just not a good time.

Vs. Regirock "Crystal."  Look, I'm having fun.  Iris is actually pretty self-sufficient as a buff bot.  Not fantastic, but good enough.  Lisia is the solution really.  Defog wipes Crit Shield, and her flinch rate on Twister is good enough when backed by a defensive wall like Mina.  That said, this process is wildly slow.  As anyone who know the Regirock fight can tell you, you really want everyone with consistent crit, or damage just doesn't start scaling fast enough.  Gauge is also, as usual, an issue, although the ability to use Whimsical Acceleration and always take Mina's sync is a slight blessing.

Vs. Entei Barry's another partner that really likes Mina's set, given that he buffs exactly 0 points of special attack.  He's also like...the only one who doesn't love SS Kris, since his DPS is poor, and he wants to spam trainer move for the boosted speed that Kris can't reliably provide without Team Swift Reaction 4.  Mina offers immediate fire-power...at the cost of sustained Rain.  It's not so bad.  I opted to bring Seaking for flinch, because a lower flinch rate is sufficient.

Vs. Moltres Anyone else tired of this thing?  So, I want to preface this by saying that, by numbers, this looks super clean.  It wasn't.  Lodge Steven just went off with Staggering 2 on grid.  Please note, Lodge Steven is not a great partner for Mina.  He can be a decent option, but he can't cap crit. You can take Sharp Entry for +2, or Follow-Through for sync, but you definitely lose out on SEUN.  What was supposed to happen was deleting the second HP bar, but Barry got really bad rolls for his speed debuffing, didn't cap speed, and had a lot less power behind his sync nuke, so he couldn't do it.  Thankfully, Steven flinched to prevent recovery, and we managed to clear.  Then we could do second round of rain, and set up Steven's sync, which missed crit and ran the risk of losing if Barry hadn't taken care of it.  It wasn't really a clean fight, but it was a successful one.

Vs. Cresselia Whimsical Immunity is a pretty nice response to Cresselia's status, and Karen is one of those Dire Hit+ holders that really enjoys Mina's presence.  The one and only issue was gauges.  Which I feel like happens for Karen a lot despite being pretty fast.  I dunno.  Maybe it's just the Icy Winds.  The point is, Karen dominates this fight pretty well, but the first phase needs to be cautiously approached so you can block Thunder Wave while still doing like any damage.  Karen's sync needs to happen twice, and Mina's should happen before those two, to ensure Fairy Zone against Thunder Wave.  Two syncs from an EX Karen definitely clears phase 1.  After that, the main thing is that Karen should DPS bar 2, allowing Mina to set Fairy Zone on sync.  Obviously this only works with 3/5 Mina, but it's a workable solution.

Final Thoughts Mina is good for Gauntlet.  I am not particularly surprised by this, but with the Tapu Wars of everyone wondering which one is best (it's Acerola), and the subsequent determination that Mina is worse SS Kris for Rain and not particularly great for Fairy Zone, it's important to remind myself that she does, in fact, have merit.

I want to say Mina took a bit more technical skill to operate, but that isn't entirely true.  A lot of this was pretty straight-forward.  Mina's strengths are capping special attack and offering tremendous defensive utility. Her weaknesses are being pretty poorly aligned to her archetypes, slow as dirt with little recourse, and surprisingly has trouble with repeated heavy-hitting single-target attacks. Yeah. That one surprised me a bit.

Cobalion was the roughest because of super-effective attacks, but it really emphasizes Mina's weaknesses broadly. Namely, that reliance on taking sync to keep Fairy Zone active for her beneficial effects. Moreover, even with boosted defenses, hard enough hits start to beat her down, and Mina only has Draining Kiss with Gradual Healing as a solution. Sure, you have your Buddy move, but that's basically a one-time use Mini Potion, maybe with Master Healer. This isn't groundbreaking. The Damage Guard for the team is, and it's only groundbreaking because it's letting her allies survive. Mina herself gets one free negation, then it's back to taking damage. Functionally, it's Endurance. It's one extra hit you can take yourself, before you drop. With no other healing potential, it's a mild problem.

Mild. You can tell from HP values, this doesn't really inhibit Mina's ability to tank. The only other fight that came close was Latias, and that's because I was playing like a lunatic. But I also want to note that, with every fight, there's offense debuffing or flinch keeping damage off her. So I do wonder how well she'd do without that, but also I'm not up for finding out right now. The point is, repeated heavy hits will annihilate her.

[audioaujom]

Sebastian Saves Sam From a Cult

Stardew Hub, < prev, next >

Hello again! This is very similar to the write from last week, but with Sam and Sebastian flipped. Sorry if it feels a little repetitive ;-; I just really like these two and got sucked into the whole “make the small town a cult” thing. Whoops. There will likely be more cult to come, but I’ll try not to make that the next update. As with the last one, this is not canon compliant, as it reimagines a handful of members of Pelican Town as members of a cult that participates in ritual sacrifice. 

Word Count: 1914

Chapter TWs: Cults, Attempted Human Sacrifice, Blood and Injury

--

————————————

From: Abby hey, are you busy rn

To: Abby Nope!

Just finishin up practice with Seb

What’s up??

From: Abby my dad wants help with some store stuff and I need to get out of it lol

prairie king?

To: Abby Sure!

Want Seb to come along?

From: Abby no, it’s fine

come by quickly, though

To: Abby Lol okay

Coming!

————————————

“Hey, Abby wants me to drop by for a bit. Catch you later?” 

“Now?” Sebastian complained, turning his keyboard off. Sam nodded with his best puppy dog eyes from his guitar stand, Sebastian rolling his eyes and crossing his arms with a small smile. “That’s fine. Everything okay, though?”

“Said she wanted out of some shop work.” Sam shrugged, both of them heading to put their shoes on by Sam’s front door. “Don’t mean to kick you out, though.”

“Nah, you’re fine. I didn’t want to stay any longer, anyway.” Sebastian teased, patting Sam on the shoulder as they two headed outside. “See you soon?” 

“Yeah!” Sam grinned, the two then chatting idly as they headed into town, eventually parting ways by the front of Pierre’s so Sebastian could head home up the mountain. Sam waved as  Sebastian walked off before turning his attention to the store once he was out of sight, pausing as he noticed the ‘CLOSED’ sign on the front door. Confused but not deterred by the sign, Sam tried the door only to find that it was open, so he stepped inside.

The lights were all off and the front section of the store completely deserted, the aisles eerie in the faded afternoon sunlight coming in through the front windows. The store was also completely silent—and so was the attached house at the back, Sam taking a couple of steps to get further inside with a small frown.

“Abby? You here?” He called, glancing around the closed shop in confusion. 

Why’d she ask me to come here to help when the place is closed?

He casually wandered further in, glancing down each of the darkened aisles of stocked food as he went. He frowned as he reached the counter, comically jumping up onto it to see behind it as if expecting to find someone hiding back there.

“Abby?” He tried again, hopping off the counter to head for the ‘Staff’ door in the back corner that led into Abigail’s house and pushing it open. He stepped through, glancing around while wondering why the house and shop would both be open when no one seemed to be home.

Upset at having been pranked—he assumed—he glanced around again to make sure no one saw him and slowly backed out of the main room to head back into the store and maybe catch up with Sebastian. As soon as he turned around to push back open the door to the shop he saw a flash of purple hair before a stinging pain slammed against the back of his head and he went crashing to the floor.

“Quickly! Before he recovers!”

Sam felt dizzy—but not any more disoriented than the few times he’s fallen from his skateboard, closing his eyes as his head pounded to try and regain his senses faster. As he felt arms wrap around his torso to lift him off the floor, he blindly started flailing his arms and feeling them occasionally smack against whoever was behind that slowly started to drag him backwards.

“I need a hand! He’s already coming back to his senses!” A voice called out from behind him, and the sudden shock of recognizing it as Pierre’s momentarily halted all of his attempts to get free.

What…?

He opened his eyes to glance around, realizing he was approaching an unfamiliar set of double doors at the end of the main room he’d never actually been through. Limp in Pierre’s arms for a moment, he saw Abigail come running towards him, a grimace crossing her face as she made eye contact with his slack-jawed expression. “Shit.”

“Hey! What are you doing?!” Sam didn’t bother trying to keep the panic off his face as Abigail went to grab his legs, managing to kick her once in the side and once in the leg, sending her crashing to the floor with a groan. She took a second to regain herself as Pierre resumed dragging him back, putting Sam enough off balance that Abigail could grab his legs and help her dad carry him into the room. Sam was too busy thrashing to take a good look at the room, letting himself be carried through a few lines of empty chairs towards a strangely ornate table that looked a little too much like an altar for his liking. 

“Oh, my. Need another set of hands?” Caroline’s head suddenly poked in through the doors, smiling softly as the two managed to lift Sam up and hold him down on top of the altar.

“That would be lovely.” Pierre sighed in relief as his wife came in, Sam panicking even harder and trying to break free from the two. Caroline then took over holding down Sam’s arms as Pierre went digging under the table, triumphantly returning with several lengths of rope, dropping all but one and then starting to loop it around one of Sam’s wrists.

“Okay but seriously, what’s going on?!” With the entire family working together, he could barely even struggle as Pierre made short work of tying the other end of the rope to a leg of the table, then uncomfortably pinning his arm flat against the table as he moved to the other one.

“Honey, is he always this noisy?” Caroline asked Abigail, who shrugged lightly.

“Yeah. Sorry for not warning you.”

“This is fuckin’ crazy…” Actually a little awed by the insanity, Sam winced as Pierre quickly tied down his other arm and then moved to join Abigail on the other side of the table.

“You’ll be fine, okay?” Caroline smiled down at him, but it only inspired a cold chill of fear instead of any comfort. “The others will be here soon, so we’ll make it quick.”

“Make what quick?” Sam asked, though he felt as if he already knew the answer as he looked up to see Pierre tie his legs down.

“You don’t need to worry about that.”

——

After passing the dilapidated Community Center and starting up the mountain path, Sebastian slowed to stop as he realized—

“Wait… isn’t today Wednesday?” He wondered aloud, looking back down the hill he already came up at Pierre’s General Store. The lights seemed to be off when he passed, and he knew the store was always closed in the middle of the week. Starting to backtrack as a strange sense of anxiety began to eat away at his stomach, Sebastian walked back down to the staircase leading into town. Quickly descending the steps, he followed the road into the town square, shielding his eyes from the sun as he jogged towards Pierre’s and peered in through the slightly tinted front windows. Not spotting anyone inside and the closed sign on the door, Sebastian tried the front door only to find that it was actually open and he pushed it open so he could step inside.

The store itself was as quiet and deserted as it appeared from the outside, Sebastian glancing around anxiously. After determining that it was—in fact—completely empty, his stomach coiled into a heavy knot of dread as he approached the staff door leading into Abigail’s house. He paused mid-reach for the handle, waiting for a second to see if he could hear anything before opening the door as the house sounded quiet as well. Fighting the urge to call out as he stepped through, Sebastian headed into the main room of the house after poking his head into Abigail’s room and finding it also empty. Before he could check any of the other rooms, he heard what sounded like hushed voices from behind a set of double doors at the far end of the room.

“What’s in there?” He mumbled under his breath to no one in particular, taking slow steps in that direction until he was close enough to make out talking from inside.

“—and with this, we can begin.” Pierre spoke as if addressing a crowd of some type, a brief moment of silence passing before Sebastian heard the familiar—though now incredibly panicked—voice of his friend.

“H—Hey!! What’s that for? Get away from me!” 

“Abby.” Pierre seemed to ignore Sam, his voice dull and bored as if—Has he done this before? “A hand?”

“No, don’t—!” Sam cut himself off with a cry of pain, Sebastian’s eyes blowing wide as he quickly threw the double doors open to charge inside.

The entire room fell still and silent as the assembled townspeople turned to look at Sebastian, who stood just inside the doorway with his mouth agape. The room was strange, with gilded tiles covering the floors and walls, a bunch of chairs set up to model pews and facing a large, ornate altar that sat atop a slight rise in the floor. The recognizable figures of Lewis, Gus, Clint, Pam, and Caroline were sitting in the seats and staring at Sebastian—who was too preoccupied with Pierre and Abigail who were standing over Sam, who’d been tied down on top of the altar. Abigail was also holding a bloodied kitchen knife, which had just been used to slash at Sam’s wrists—which were now steadily dripping blood into large buckets beneath the head of the table.

“Sam!” Sebastian charged up through the center aisle created by the chairs, ignoring the townspeople who stood up in protest as he ran faster than he thought he could to reach his injured friend.

“Sebastian…?” Sam’s head slowly rolled to the side, his slightly bleary and clouded eyes noticing his friend’s rapidly approaching form.

“Now, there’s no need to interrupt.” Pierre warned, starting to reach for Abigail’s weapon but moving a moment too slow as Sebastian kicked out and hit him in the stomach.

“Dad!” Abigail—in her surprise—dropped the knife as her father fell hard to the floor, clutching at his stomach with a winded cough. Sebastian lunged for the knife as she realized her mistake, him standing up in time to punch her hard in the face and send her crashing into Pierre as he tried to get up.

Sebastian quickly sawed through the ropes around Sam’s wrists and helped him sit up, aiming the knife towards the onlookers who had begun to approach. “Don’t even think about it. I want all of you out of here. This… whatever… ends now.”

The assembled townspeople looked at each other warily, glancing between the knife in Sebastian’s hand and the crumpled forms of Abigail and Pierre and started backing away, allowing Sebastian to cut Sam’s legs free and begin to fret over his bleeding forearms.

“Keep pressure on it, that’ll slow the bleeding. We’ll get you to Harvey, he can help.”

“Sebastian, you…” Sam trailed off as he pressed his injured forearms against his shirt in an attempt to slow the bleeding. “How’d you know I was here?”

“This place is closed on Wednesday.” Sebastian explained, helping Sam off the altar and doing his best to support his friend’s weight as they hurried out of the room and into the main area of the store. “Realized that about halfway home and came back to make sure you were okay.” “Thanks, man.” Sam smiled widely, before a new wince of pain came across his face wiped it away.

“Come on, I gotcha.”

[bloodiedmedic]

How Alexis could fit into Batman/DC

(thank you for the suggestion @oculusxcaro ) Okay so first of all I’m going to set this in Gotham with Batman, and all of them. Partially because I think it does work well for Alexis, partly because I’m somewhat familiar with Gotham (I’m real behind on the comics now though so don’t expect anything up to date) due to Rping as Cassandra Cain at one point.

Alexis was a medical school student, and had successfully completed both their undergraduate degree as well as medical school moving into their residency at around 26-27 years of age. However after spending about two years in their residency (either emergency medicine, or surgery. I’m leaning more towards emergency medicine for various reasons) they had the misfortune of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Being half Japanese, and in fact able to speak Japanese as well as one of the top five students in their class but not the top 1 or 2 it was easy for a particular group that called themselves Yakuza (Alexis still doesn’t know if they were actually affiliated with the full Yakuza group in Gotham or if they just claimed they were) to decide to abduct Alexis when one of them needed medical attention as Alexis was skilled enough to do the job and could communicate effectively but wasn’t so high up in their class as to attract much attention when they disappeared. Just one more medical school burn out, whoops.

The original plan was actually to kill Alexis, and drop them in a river but after the demonstration of Alexis’ medical skills they decided to keep Alexis. Being snatched up around 28-29 years old Alexis than spent the next six or seven years as this small groups captive. During their time being held captive basically everything bad that could happen to them did happen, or close to. While there they learned how to move quietly, and how to be very violent when need be. Along with that the group in order to pay off a debt temporarily handed Alexis off to a mad scientist. Possibly Hugo Strange, possibly Paul Dekker, or maybe someone else entirely. Alexis remembers little of their time with the scientist except pain, and when they were given back to their captors they had an interesting little implant. The implant in question when triggered allows them to cut off their ability to feel pain, and speeds them up faster than a normal human could generally move. Not so fast as to be a speedster or a metahuman, but a bit beyond what “normal” humans can normally do. It does not make them stronger, or let them heal faster, or anything else. There’s a possibility it’s an experimental test for a new usage of Dionesium, or a related substance. Alexis neither knows nor cares. That implant made them much more effective at fighting back when they got the chance, and they went from hoping they could escape to actively looking for an opportunity to escape.

Now somewhere between 35 and 37 they have in fact escaped, and although they are still in Gotham have gone as far away from the side of Gotham their captors normally stayed in as possible while also going to a poor neighborhood as they had little in the way of money. Currently they make money by either working as a translator, or providing cheap and easy medical care in the way of stitching up wounds or setting bones and the like.

Alexis is trying not to attract attention, but is also a bit desperate for an actual stable job that will pay enough they no longer have to live at a cheap crappy motel. However as they have nothing to their name, and no real way to prove they are who they say they are or to get their school records or anything else… they are a bit stuck. There is also a decent (but not definite) chance they were declared legally dead.

In short they are a medical professional who has been working against their will for criminals for the last 6-7 years, and are now actually quite skilled at it but have no way to prove it and due to trauma and needing to hide their responses have developed a very flattened/blunted emotional effect that makes them seem at best stoic and at worst uncaring to most people.

Where are they in Gotham currently? Probably a street corner, poor neighborhood, bad motel, cheap cafe, or trudging down the street trying to figure out how to get their next meal.

[skiplo-wave]

https://www.tumblr.com/skiplo-wave/751757419658526720/hmm-if-this-is-in-boys-universe-where-all-powers?source=share

there is absolutely no version of Homelander or Omni man that would beat Superman. And this ain’t even me glazing, I hate that kryptonian nigga.

Homelander isn't accustomed to fighting other super powered beings so he would get wrecked by a guy like supes who battles capes on a daily basis.

His go-to move is his laser vision and that tends to be a one and done move. I don't think he's ever gotten into a real fist fight, so he'd be outta his depth if it came down to it.

The fight would go as such: Homelander would get angry and just laser Superman expecting him to get bisected, Superman doesn't even flinch or blink, Homelander starts to panic because that has literally never happened before and throws a blind punch. Superman blocks it effortlessly and then proceeds to beat Homelander senseless.

Let me put it this way, if Soldier Boy’s flightless ass can beat the brakes off of Homelander, you KNOW supes can.

And Omni man:

Superman can move hundreds of thousand of times faster than light. He's benched pressed the earth's weight at 700 quintillion tons. He can see at a sub atomic level, held a black hole in his hands. He can both move fast enough to phase through solid objects and use the infinite mass punch like the flash. He's patched holes in reality itself and can charge his heat vision to wipe of a football fields worth of space or focus it so finely he can perform a lobotomy instantly. He's so powerful he can tank supernovas and can hear high frequency sounds millions of miles away through the vacuum of space. He is the epitome of broken and not even every super combined in invincible could put him down if he went rogue.His heat vision is also likely to really hurt Omni and he has no defense for it. Superman blitzes and breaks Omni's back in two pieces. Also, Omni's weakness is certain loud frequencies that I'm sure Superman can create, or at least get access to incredibly quickly to make the fight an even easier walk.

Superman is just much stronger, much faster, and has a bigger arsenal. Way too easy for Superman

And simply, both of those verses are way weaker than the DC verse. Batman would whoope Butcher, Supes would kill Homelander, Wonder Woman whoops Maeve and Supergirl blitzes Starlight.

And every single one of the robins can would Hughie’s ass lol.

lol you right!

Homelander does not have fighter skills and use his laser beam as default which if you a super can easily tank that shit. Most are there for show anyway so basically fighting skilled vs no/lack of skill

Mark could beat homelander and kill him by accident even

Now this is my hot take

Omni man and Superman fighting each other would be a challenge. Vilitermites are built like tanks and if you don’t kill them they just heal and get stronger. Not mention their speed. So personally it’s whomever lasts longer before breaking or gets upper hand to strike. Omni man does not hesitate so Supe has be locked in or else

[sleepyselkiesims]

Part 48

Oh whoops, forgot about prom! Will Attina go? Surely she won't miss her brother's big day!

Aha.... she's too busy playing with the cat. For once.

Snow White was also doing a weird job celebrating.

The rest of the family got the birthday dance party memo!

Sage was the first to get the candles, as Lark... tried to cast a spell on him??

Huh, ok, Sage got an escort for his birthday walk-out!

Uhh... you can go back in, Oak. This may take a while.

Aaaaaaaany second now.... at least he's faster than the toddlers.

Oh good, there we go!

Oak gave up halfway. As expected.

While Sage went off on his birthday pilgrimage, Thyme got his turn at the candles!

Attina opted out of this celebration too.

Oh, Thyme's getting an entire entourage! Ok!

The family respectfully waited at the corner as Thyme went off to do his thing.

Happy birthday, Thyme! ....wait, what's going on over there?

Umm??? Hi??

I bet you 10 simoleons she's complaining about their parents. One of whom mysteriously disappeared when Agnes arrived.

All right, here's the beautiful birthday boys! And they are gone.

Bonus

Awwwww, sweet little Moss gave Snow Jr. some attention during the festivities! How sweet!

[itsallyscorner]

࿔*:･ﾟTwo in One | H.S

↝ pairing: Harry Styles x actress!reader

↝ summary: Harry finds Marvel interviews hard to do, luckily for him, you’re there to help.

↝ warnings: some cussing obvi. This was longer than expected whoops

↝ a/n: still struggling with trying to write so I decided to clash two of my favorite things in the world to help my creativity flow :) anyway I’m a whore for co-star fics oop🤪

“Right, so you’re paired up with Harry the entire tour. You okay with that?” Tasha, your publicist, informed you. You and the rest of your team had just arrived at the hotel where all the interviews for today’s press junket would be held.

At the moment you were in LA promoting the latest installment of the Eternals series. The last couple of months have been surprisingly enjoyable for you and your career. While you were a talented and well known actress around the world, you were famously known for the character you play in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. You’ve been part of the MCU family for a couple of years now;your first appearance being Captain America: Civil War and your latest one being in the Eternals sequel.

You were excited to be part of the Eternals crew, however, you still missed your Avengers family. Despite your character being around the longest in the cast, you were still the newbie amongst the actors. Everyone knew each other from the previous film so it was like a reunion for the lot of them. You were nervous to meet everyone, but the first table read you all had proved you had nothing to be anxious about. Immediately they made you feel welcome and it honestly felt like you knew them for ages. Though out of everyone, the one person who made you the most comfortable would have to be Harry.

He might’ve been shy at first but that didn’t hide the fact that he was an absolute sweetheart who was genuinely interested in getting to know you. He was intrigued by you—your personality, your journey as an actress—everything about you was just so interesting to him. While there was a hint of flirting and typical banter between you both, you guys were friends;close friends to be specific. Did you find him attractive? Yes, of course you did who wouldn’t? And yeah, there is definitely chemistry between the two of you, though you chose to not act on your feelings.

1. Harry was dating Olivia Wilde and you really didn’t need to be in the center of a cheating rumor

2. You weren’t too comfortable with the whole “dating co-stars while working on set” kind of thing.

Besides having a crush on him, you were okay admiring him from afar and supporting him as a friend. Even when filming wrapped up, you both remained in contact with each other, no matter what time zone or country you were both in.

Adjusting the black sunglasses that rested on the bridge of your nose you turn to Tasha, “Course I’m okay with that! More than happy actually, I’m more comfortable with him than everyone else here.” You admit to her as security guards guide you towards the elevators of the hotel.

Tasha peers at you from behind her coffee cup, “You two get along well.” She comments, though there was a hint of something behind her tone. Your brows slightly crease, turning to look at her, you find a cheeky smirk on her face.

You and your team, along with the security guards enter the elevator. One of the guards pressed a button and the elevators slide shut. You noticed your heart skipping a beat as the floors of the elevator increased. The higher you went the faster your heart seemed to beat out your chest. At first you thought it was nerves, but it wasn’t, it was the brunette haired boy waiting for you in a hotel room a few floors above you. However, you pushed down the feeling, not wanting to get caught up in your little crush for him throughout the entire press tour.

“Stop it.” You mumble towards Tasha, the smirk still evident on her features. While she was your publicist, the two of you managed to form a beautiful friendship over the past 6 to 8 years you’ve known each other. She was one of you best friends at this point.

The tall blonde shrugged, “I’m just saying, he’s newly single and I’m sure he wouldn’t mind you making a few moves here and there.” She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, her engagement ring flashing against the harsh elevator lights. The elevator dings and everyone slowly files out.

“That’s exactly why I shouldn’t say anything about my feelings. He’s freshly single, might I emphasize, I’m sure he’d want to explore the freedom of being single again.” You explain, linking your arms with Tasha’s. “Plus, it’s a crush, it’s not like I’m in love with him or something.”

Tasha rolled her eyes at your stubbornness.

“I understand Y/n. But there’s literally no denying that there’s something between you two. Whether you’d like to explore that or not is totally up to you, though as someone who’s quite familiar with the situation, I’d say you just go for it.” She advised while the two of you walked down the hall looking for the room with your and Harry’s name outside of it. You smile as you pass some interviewers already waiting outside the rooms, offering a little “hi” or “hello”.

When you spot Harry’s name on the door you stop in your tracks and turn to Tasha.

“Thank you Tash for the advice, really. But right now I just need to avoid thinking of that and just focus on the interviews. You know how overwhelmed I can get and the fact that he’s gonna be there the entire time doesn’t really help.” You reason with her. You appreciated her advice, although you seriously couldn’t be hyper focused on your crush on Harry. Maybe it was the fact that you were seeing him again for the first time that made you so giddy and lowkey obsessed with him. Whatever it was, you didn’t want to focus on it.

“Understood.” Tasha nodded. She peaked into the room where Harry and the camera crew was setting up. “Alright, you all good to go in? How’re you feeling?” She checked up on you.

“I’m good.” You confirmed. Tasha walked into the room, you trailing behind her. It was the typical setup: a backdrop with the film’s title plastered on it, a few chairs, and a camera crew. Tasha greeted Jeff, Harry’s manager, the two sharing a friendly hug. You greeted him as well before walking further into the room.

Already sat in the director’s chair with his name behind it was Harry. He was on his phone, mindlessly scrolling with his brows scrunched together, almost slouching in the chair. The increase in volume kn the room caught his attention, causing him to look up from his phone.

You eyes widen when his instantly connect with yours. His face brightens, eyebrows raising and a smile that squeezed into his cheeks.

“Hey you!” He excitedly greets you, hopping out of the chair with his arms wide open for you. Your own lips form into its own sweet smile as you find yourself being engulfed by Harry’s arms.

“Hello to you too!” You laugh into his shoulder, your arms wrapping around his waist. He leans back to look properly at you, though his arms remained around your figure.

“You’re late.” He teased you, a glint of playfulness in his green eyes. Your mouth gaped dramatically, leaning further away from him.

“Am not! I’m actually on time—“ you cut yourself off to look over your shoulder at Tasha. “Tash, we’re on time aren’t we?”

You feel Harry chuckle at your banter, eager to prove him wrong. The blonde smirks at you, “Thirty minutes ahead schedule.”

“Told you.” Harry rolls his eyes at you before bringing you back into his chest. Sure, you were friends, but when it came to showing affection, you and Harry were very touchy and “huggy” people.

“It’s been so long since we’ve seen each other, I’ve missed ya.” He looked down at you, eyeing your outfit for the day. “You look gorgeous by the way, love.”

A light blush forms on your cheeks, “Thank you, H. You don’t look too bad yourself.” You say, patting the lapels of his blazer. His outfit was fashionably casual yet comfy all at the same time. It made him look very soft and cuddly. Plus that stand of hair that curled against his forehead was very attractive—simple yet very effective.

He thanks you, leading you towards your chairs with his arm around you. He gives you a hand to hop onto the director’s chair before sitting in his own.

You lean you elbow on the arm rest and place your chin in your palm, “So, first interview for the movie, you nervous?”

He copies your stance, shifting closer to you, so the conversation was only between you both.

“Y’know what? Yes, actually I am.” He admits with a breath.

“Really?”

“Yeh, I mean it’s a bit different from other movies I’ve promoted. I’ve never been so self conscious about accidentally spoiling something.” He spoke, using his hands to emphasize his point. “Marvel’s bloody secretive, I feel like m’head’s bout to be chopped off or something if I let something slip.”

You let out the laugh at his comment, “I mean you’re not Tom Holland or Mark Ruffalo, so you’ll be fine.” You said, nudging his shoulder with yours.

Shaking his head he stares at you, “I don’t know how y’do it, I’m shitting m’pants right now.” The corner of his lip raises to cover up his nerves. He was joking for the most part, although Harry was genuinely worried about sharing too much about the movie or his character. The movie was a big deal to him since it was a different experience to the previous movies he’s been in. Marvel movies had more action to them and it was an honor to be part of the wide-ranging world of the MCU.

Harry was more than happy to be coupled up with you for the entire press tour. Besides the fact that’s he’s been having a budding crush on you, the two of you got along great and we’re very comfortable with each other’s presence. You bounced off each other effortlessly and there was a natural connection between you both—at least that’s what Harry believes.

“Oh, please! You’re going to be fine, Harry. I’m sure these interviews will feel like a breeze once you get through the first one.” You assure him, placing a hand on his arm. “Plus, I’m gonna be right next to you if you need help. You’ve got nothing to worry about.” You grin, the dimples in your cheeks going unnoticed by Harry. He had an urge to poke them, not in a menacing or teasing kind of way, but in a “oh you’re so cute, I adore you” type of way.

Harry hums into his palm gazing staring at you, “Guess you’ll be my good luck charm then, huh?”

“Sure, though I can’t guarantee how much luck I’ll be for you.” You snort, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear.

“I mean you’ve already got the charm, think we’re already halfway there, darling.” He shamelessly flirted. A boost of confidence shot through him when he saw you attempt to hide the smile behind your hand.

“Shut it.” You muttered, feeling a bit flustered at his comment. You’re so pathetically down bad for this man that a simple bloody pickup line was enough to have you blushing like a teenager, you thought to yourself. Gosh, you wanted to ram yourself into a wall headfirst.

Harry huffed, gently pulling your hand from your face, “Oi, don’t get all shy on me. I don’t need ya ignoring me the entire day.”

You placed your hand down to glare at him, “That was one time.”

“Y’still didn’t talk to me the entire day.” Harry rebutted, tilting his head at you. Happy that he could finally see your face again, he rested his head on your shoulder. The room was full of murmurs from different people. The film crew was double checking all the equipment and lighting before interviews began, while Tasha and Jeff were having a run down on today’s schedule.

Everything around you and Harry was loud and borderline chaotic. Yet the two of you sat in comfortable silence. Since you’ve arrived Harry’s nerves had calmed down. His palms weren’t moist and his heart wasn’t pounding as hard against his chest anymore.

“Y’know I actually did miss you.” Harry spoke, shifting to look up at you.

“I missed you too. I always see videos and pictures of you on tour, looks like so much fun.” You hum. Harry lifts his head off you, “Oh, y’keeping tabs on me now?” He smirked, earning him a swat on the chest to which he feigned hurt at.

“You wish.” You scoffed jokingly.

“You should come to one of the shows one day. I know a guy who can get me tickets.” He offered, the corners of his eyes crinkling at his own joke.

“Oh really?” You play along. Harry nodded seriously, “Yeh, he works for the guy who sings and all that. I heard he’s a right dick though.”

“Your friend’s not wrong.” You claim causing Harry to gasp at you in offense. The banter was cut short when Tasha and Jeff approached you two, signing that it was time for the interviews to start.

*clip 1 🎬*

“So Harry, how was it like to work with someone who’s been in the Marvel business for a while now?” Claire, an interviewer asked. “Did you ask her for any advice? Have you learned anything from her—what was that like?” Harry took a sip from his Starbucks cup and hummed.

Harry turned his head to look at Y/n with the corner of his mouth quirked up.

“She was horrible.” The camera panned to Y/n who’s mouth was in an “o” shape. Before she can speak, Harry placed a hand on her knee and began sputtering apologies through his laughter.

“He’s quite the comedian.” Y/n sarcastically remarks while Harry is pulling her into his side. Claire giggles at the two’s antics.

“I’m kidding, I’m kidding!” Harry started. His arm remained around Y/n’s shoulders. “Y/n’s the opposite of horrible. She’s been such a help since day one and she’s been helping me today during these interviews. Uhm, I’m very appreciative of her actually—because she’s been patient with me and the ridiculous amount of questions I have. She’s been a kind of guide for me while we were filming this movie and I couldn’t have gotten through it without her.” He finished with a shy shrug.

“That was sweet.” Y/n cooed at Harry, who only blushed in response.

“Was it?”

“Yeah.” She nodded.

“Well I meant it.”

*clip 2 🎬*

“I know you guys can’t say much about the movie, but can one of you try to give the audience an idea of what goes down in this film?” Josh another interviewer asked.

Y/n hummed to herself in thought.

“Y’know I’ve been dreading that question.” Harry mentioned wiggling his pointer finger at the interviewer. Y/n snorted to herself and jokingly pushed Harry to lean back into his seat.

“I’ll take it.”

Harry looks up at the ceiling and said, “Oh, thank God.”

Josh laughed at Harry, “You’re not willing to risk spoiling it, huh?”

Harry shook his head, “Are y’kidding me? I’ve been on the edge of m’seat the entire time.”

“Have the people at Marvel given you the talk about spoiling the movies?” Josh asked.

“Yeh, they’re very strict about what we’re allowed to say and not say about the film.” Harry pointed behind him, “Actually a few minutes before we started, they had to pull me aside and remind me that I can’t say this or that about the film.”

An amused expression was on Y/n’s features, “Did they actually?”

Harry looked at her seriously, “Yeah! Wait—you didn’t get one?”

“Nope.” Y/n answered causing Harry to slump into his seat with his arms crossed. Josh and Y/n laughed at the man.

“Hey man, Y/n doesn’t need it, she’s a trained professional.” Josh said in the actress’s defense.

“Y/n, how has Harry been in the spoiling department? Has he let anything slip or almost slip?”

“He’s been doing well. Thankfully, he hasn’t let anything slip out yet, but that’s only cause he makes me answer all the hard questions.” Y/n replied, making quotation marks with her hands when she said the word hard.

Harry raised his hand like a child in primary school.

“I’d like to point out that I just helped us avoid answering the question about the movie by changing the subject.” He stated proudly earning himself a high five from his lovely co-star.

*clip 3 🎬*

“So Harry, we got to meet Eros towards the end of the first Eternals movie. What can the audience expect from him in this sequel?” Silence filled the room as Harry stared at the interviewer with a blank expression.

“Uh—hmm—what can we expect from Eros?” Harry mumbled to himself, looking everywhere but the interviewer.

“Mmm, uh, I-I don’t know.” He tried to answer with a sheepish grin on his lips. Harry fully turned his body to look at Y/n and leaned down to whisper in her ear.

“I need help.” He whispered, though the mic picked it up. Y/n began to whisper in his ear with her hands covering her mouth. Harry’s mouth gaped as if he were going to speak.

“Uh, we get to learn more about him as a character and what he means to the story of the film.” He recited almost childlike.

“What are some things will we learn about Eros in this film—that you can tell us, of course?” The interviewer continued to question, enjoying the interaction between Harry and Y/n.

Harry’s eyes widened as he sheepishly leaned back down to Y/n. She giggled to herself and began whispering in his ear again. Harry’s eyes furrowed before looking at Y/n in confusion.

“Am I allowed to say that?” He asked her.

“Yeah, they mentioned it at the end of the movie.” She explained.

“When?” His tone growing more confused and concerned that he wasn’t aware of the information about his character. Harry scratched his temple with the hand that rested behind Y/n’s chair and placed his hand back where it was.

“When Eros literally entered the scene.” Y/n clarified. Harry awkwardly smiled at the interviewer and sat back into his seat.

“If I get in trouble I’m blaming you.” Harry warned her.

Y/n rolled her eyes at him, “They all know Thanos and Eros are brothers, Harold.” She looks at the interviewer, “Right?”

The interview nodded in confirmation, “Yes ma’am.”

“Well alright then, anyway—.” Harry continued

*clip 4🎬*

“I think I’m not the only one who notices the lovely friendship between you two, you guys are adorable.” The next interviewer, Ana, pointed out.

Harry nudged Y/n cheekily, “Oh, stop it.”

“But you guys really are!” Ana exclaimed at the the two. Harry threw his arm around Y/n and pressed their cheeks together.

“We’re cute aren’t we?”

“We just can’t resist each other, we must be together all the time.” Y/n said, going along with Harry. She grasped his arms around her and squeezed it.

“At all costs. We’re practically attached at the hip.”

Ana laughed at the two actors, “I don’t doubt that.”

*clip 5🎬*

“How was it like working with each other? You guys seem like very great friends so I’m assuming all was well?” Another interviewer, Ben questioned the two.

Harry was seen stretching down in his seat to grab Y/n’s coffee, who was seconds earlier, struggling to pick up her coffee from the floor. He hands her the cup while she thanks him quietly.

“I guess I’ll start, Y/n’s been helping me answer questions all day.” Harry began. Y/n chuckled at him and continued to sip on her straw.

“We really do get on well, Y/n and I. I enjoyed working with everyone in the cast, but I honestly had the best time with her. Y’know, I don’t think I’ve ever admitted this, but I’m a huge fan of her and her work. It was a huge honor to work with someone who’s insanely talented. She puts so much passion in her work and working alongside her is something I’d like to do again. She’s the sweetest and most caring person I’ve ever met and she never fails to make me laugh, I truly adore her.” Harry admiringly answered, fiddling with the rings that wrapped around his long fingers.

“Harry.” Y/n cooed at him, her heart warming at his little speech. Her hand smoothed his back, lightly brushing past his brunette hair.

Harry sniffed and jokingly wiped an invisible tear from his eye, “Gosh, I’m sorry.” Causing Y/n and Ben to laugh.

“Y/n? How about you?”

Y/n smiled to herself, “I mean he’s amazing. Like he said, we got really close to each other on set and we’ve became the best of friends. It was a joy to work beside him, he brought so much energy to set and was an all around sweetheart. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t love him, he’s someone you want to always be around and have in your life. It made me really happy and proud to see him on the big screen because he’s so talented and I wish to see him in more films in the future.” She answered beaming at Harry with a glint in her eyes.

Harry rested his chin in his palm and stared at Y/n with the same look in his eyes, “We should just become a two in one deal and film all our movies with each other.”

“That’s not a bad idea, Styles.” Y/n acknowledged.

“It’s a good idea innit?” Harry looks behind the camera and waves his hand, “Get on that, Jeffery!”

[fushiguroll]

HAIKYUU BOYS TEACHING YOU TO DRIVE

⇢ bokuto kotaro, miya atsumu, yaku morisuke, aone takanobu, nishinoya yu, oikawa toru

a/n: am I y/n oikawa’s? yes, absolutely. can I not tell my left from my right? yes, sometimes but I don’t want to hear about it.

ʚɞ BOKUTO Kotaro | bokuto was so excited when you asked him to teach you to drive. “really? you’re asking me and not akaashi?” “yes, bokuto, you.” immediately was ready for lessons. tried his best to explain things to you but ends up confusing you more with the weird terms he has. doesn’t call the “gearshift” gearshift, referred to it as  “PRNDL”. was so nervous when you guys finally go on the road. he was very encouraging but but you see his knuckles turn white from gripping unto his seatbelt too tightly. you appreciate it but its honestly more distracting than helpful. “GOOD JOB BABY! NOW TURN LEFT!” “YES FANTASTIC! NOW TURN RIGHT!” “ko, could you please stop yelling?” “I’M NOT YELLING! YOU’RE DOING GREAT!” gave you the biggest hug afterwards. aside from the yelling, he’s a pretty good instructor. 8/10. 

ʚɞ MIYA Atsumu | also very excited to teach you to drive, but unlike bokuto who genuinely excited to teach you, atsumu was using the lesson as a chance to show off his driving skills. you’ll probably drive very little because he’s too busy “demonstrating” for you. “okay, let’s switch places. I’ll show ya how to reverse.” “tsumu, you can just teach me, you don’t have to show me.” “nah, nah, princess, ya gotta see for yerself.” not that you’re complaining though because he definitely does that hand on the back of your headseat thing as he reverses and you know that’s hot. swoon. but if you want a chance at passing your driver’s test, osamu as your teacher would be a better bet. 6/10. 

ʚɞ YAKU Morisuke | immediately goes into instructor mode the moment you asked him to teach you to drive. sat you down and gave you a presentation on the in and outs of traffic rules before you’re even allowed to sit in the driver’s seat. very strict and expected you to follow his directions to the t, after all, you came to him to learn right? “alright, now use the turn signal right here. make sure to check your side mirrors, once, then twice. now turn your head to check the blindspot. I SAID TURN YOUR HEAD TO SEE THE BLIND SPOTS!” “STOP YELLING AT ME!” “TURN YOUR HEAD!” apologized to you for the yelling, but it’s the same story all over again at your next lesson. however, it was all wroth it because you scored a perfect 100 on both your writing and driving test. 9.5/10 (minus .5 for the yelling). 

ʚɞ AONE Takanobu | aone’s lessons were pretty nerve-wrecking not because he yelled at you, but the opposite, its the fact that he barely commented on anything. you’re not sure if you’re doing things right because he’s not saying anything but you saw the wince in his face when you accidentally sped past a speed bump. “sorry, I’m supposed to go slow right?” he nodded, slowly bringing a hand up to the handlebar. when you brake too slow and almost hit the car in front of you, aone again doesn’t say anything except, “brake faster.” a lot of uncomfortable silence because you’re both nervous about your driving. he gave you a little head pat afterwards and muttered, “good job.” he tried to avoid you the next few days so you don’t ask him to teach you again but it wasn’t like you were planning to anyways. 4/10. 

ʚɞ NISHINOYA Yu | asking nishinoya to teach you to drive was both entertaining and lowkey a life hazard to everyone else on the road. he gave you a very very brief overview of the car, pointed to things and just went, “that’s the brake, that’s the gas pedal, the D is drive, the N is neutral, the R is reverse. got it? kay, let’s go!” once you’re on the road, he urged you to go faster, probably forced you to go on the highway on the first day. crazy man will even roll down the window and scream at passing cars, “FIRST TIME DRIVER WHOOP WHOOP!” when you’re more comfortable, he tried to convince you to reenact some fast and furious scene. by the end of it, you thanked God for guiding both of you back safely and in one piece. y Instructor Nishinoya is a fun time guaranteed and you will learn how to drive with the small risk of potentially losing your life. 6/10 (minus 4 points for being an irresponsible instructor). 

ʚɞ OIKAWA Toru | was so pleased you came to him for driving lessons, he’s always thought himself a superior driver. If only he knew the sole reason you came to him was because Iwaizumi, Mattsun and Makki were all busy. Anyhow, in the beginning, Oikawa was very patient and kind, full of encouragements and praises for you. but the longer you drive and the more times you couldn’t distinguish between your left from your right, the more he wanted to tear his hair out. tried his best to stay patient but you could tell he’s losing his mind the higher pitched his voice got. “Okay,  that’s it. now go left. no y/n, that’s your right signal. I said left. That’s the side you don’t write with. LEFT! GO LEFT!” he cut the lesson short with some lame excuse about needing to use the restroom. texted Iwaizumi afterwards, “I’m never taking y/n out to drive again. It’s your turn.” hey, at least you tried your best. 5/10. 

reblogs are wildly appreciated <3

main masterlist | haikyū masterlist

[shouldershimmycity]

Resurrection Pt. 3 (Rooster x Reader)

The past two years of your life have been miserable. While recovering from an accident that left you scarred and traumatized, you get called back to Fightertown, USA to co-instruct a mission; despite having been honorably discharged. You thought it would be simple, until a certain Lieutenant starts to bring you back to life.

TW: Mentions of scars, depression, anxiety, accidents, death, injuries.

A LOT OF THIS IS DIALOGUE FROM THE MOVIE

MWAHAHAHAHA I WROTE THIS IMMEDIATELY AFTER THE OTHER ONE SO MERRY CHRISTMAS YOU GET TWO IN ONE NIGHT! MWAH!

*****

“You want me to do WHAT?” you shouted into the phone. 

This was too far, what he was asking you to do. This was unacceptable. This… This was insane, and yet he knew you were the only one dumb enough to do it, but also the only other person who could do it. 

You had to take a moment to rewind the events that had put you in this situation in the first place.

***** 

Work was quiet, all day there was nary a peep on base. The only noise was the sound of four F/A-18s taking off to do a funeral salute/flyover for Admiral Kazansky. They returned just as fast as they had left. 

17:00 came faster than you had expected it to, and you began packing up for the day. You had texted Maverick a few times throughout the course of the day to make sure he was alright, and if his texts told the truth, he was holding on okay. 

It started to rain just a little as you made your way out to your Jeep, but nothing that actually came down hard. You had a lot on your mind lately, and as Rooster had pointed out the night before, mortality was a delicate thing. 

Obviously, you knew that better than anyone else, but the fact that the mission was growing closer made you feel uneasy. Knowing that someone wasn’t coming home made you want to vomit in the parking lot right there. If you were going, it would be different, but you weren’t. You looked toward the sky, and felt as though the world was weeping for what it had lost and for what was yet to come.

*****

“You are cleared for takeoff,” the tower confirmed, and you hooted with anticipation.

“Let’s go baby,” you whooped, pushing the throttle forward and bringing the flaps of your F/A-18 down, creating lift beautifully. You pulled off the ground, floating into the air. It was a wonderful thing.

It was every other day for you, but it still gave you chills. It was supposed to be just like every other day, and you found out the hard way that you were wrong. 

Twenty minutes into your flight, your wingman noticed fire coming out of your left engine, just as the alarm began blaring. You had looked around frantically and had only just begun to extinguish the fire when the entire back of the aircraft ignited. You had been extremely lucky, and had ejected just as the explosion occurred. You lived.

You lived, but you lived with the knowledge of what it feels like to have the flesh on your body burn almost clean off. Almost every night when you went to sleep you felt it, and your own screams reverberated through your skull until they woke you. 

It haunted you.

*****

You looked around discombobulated, unsure of what had woken you up from your sleep. Sitting up from your kitchen counter, a piece of paper stuck to your face, and you tore it off. The lights in your house were still on and you had fallen asleep while reviewing paperwork. A knock sounded at your door, and you realized the knock must have alerted you.

It’s eleven at night, what the hell?

Too annoyed to care about unwanted social interaction, you opened the door and your expression immediately melted. 

Bradley stood there, in a T shirt and jeans, looking forlorn. 

“Hey, did I wake you?” he asked.

“No, no I was just going over some paperwork,” you lied, and he reached up to your forehead to remove a paperclip from your hair. 

“Busted,” he smirked, handing you the tiny metal clip. 

Rolling your eyes, you opened the door for him to come in. You offered him a drink, but he declined.

“What’s on your mind Bradley?” you leaned against a kitchen cabinet, opening the floor for him to speak.

“I have to get something off my chest,” he said, standing directly in front of you. Those eyes that held your heart stared right into your soul tonight, and you shifted in anticipation of what he had to say. 

“Go on,” you spoke gently. 

“I can’t seem to get you out of my head,” he began, clearly torn by whether or not this was a good idea to say. “But I go to bed at night and I’m thinking about you, and I wake up in the morning and I’m thinking about you. I’m flying and I’m thinking about you.”

The thudding of your heart filled your entire body and you felt cold from the fear that this was a dream, or it was a sick prank. His eyes were shining in the warm kitchen light. 

“Is that crazy of me?” he whispered, wanting you to either slap him and tell him to get out or to laugh at him. He wasn’t sure what was going on. 

“I don’t think so,” you matched the volume of his voice, “I often think about you as well… but I’m not sure what that means, Bradley.” There he goes, leaning in again.

“Zippy, I know it’s not right to say, but I want you. I want to know you, I want to understand you, and I feel strongly for you. But if you don’t think that is something for us. If that’s not feasible, I will leave and we can act like this conversation never took place…”

“I don’t want that,” you said, and he looked hurt for a second before you corrected yourself, “I mean I don’t want you to leave, Bradley.” He was inches away from your face now, and you could smell his breath mixed with his cologne and it reminded you of heaven if such a thing did exist. You knew it did when he finally kissed you.

His lips were warm on yours, gentle even, and he cupped your chin with his index finger and thumb. He tilted his head and pressed ever so slowly deeper into the kiss, your hands coming up to his broad shoulders and his digging into your hair and moving down to your waist. His weight pressed against you, to hold you captive against the cabinets where you stood. It was your turn for you to run your hands up through his hair, and he sighed into the kiss. Some moral wall inside you crumbled, and you had no care for the consequences of your actions in that moment. Pushing against Bradley’s shoulders, he pulled away.

“I’m sorry,” he began, huffing from a lack of air but your head shook in response.

“Don’t ever stop, Bradley, please” you pleaded, also taking in the air you could before he was back to you. It wasn’t soft anymore, the two of you were a mix of teeth, tongue, and grabbing at each other's shirts. The collar of his shirt was now fisted in your hands as you pulled him into you, moaning when his hand met your ass. You ground your hips against him ever so slightly and he groaned. 

You broke the kiss, pushing him off you and dragging him by his hand to the bedroom. When the door was closed, he pushed you back onto the bed and got on top of you. He was kissing your neck, and reaching under your shirt. It wasn’t until he went to undo your jeans that you grabbed his wrists, hard. His eyes snapped up to you and suddenly you were very aware of what was about to happen.

“Bradley,” your voice cracked, “wait I…”

He tugged his hands out of your grip and put them above his head, no longer touching you, he sat lightly on your hips and waited for you to speak. He was a gentleman, and he would never do anything without your permission. You sat up, your hair falling around your face and you looked down at your hands.

“Bradley, I have to tell you something, if we’re going to go through with this,” you started and he nodded, giving you his full attention. You slid your legs out from under him and got up from the bed, and Rooster turned to face you, his face serious. You were finding it hard to summon the words that you hadn’t told anyone, the only people who knew were those who read your file. 

“So…” you faltered on your words, and Bradley took your hand and squeezed it.

“It’s okay, whenever you’re ready, Zip,” you smiled at the nickname.

“You know that I was in an accident,” you stated, your voice trembling, “and you know that that accident left me with scars.” He nodded.

“I left with more than just this one,” you admitted, hands shaking. Bradley looked at you expectantly, but not in a way that you felt pushed you to fess up. It was encouraging. You grabbed a fist of fabric as you lifted your right pant leg, showing off the burn and graft scars. You didn’t look up to meet his gaze as you dropped the pant leg.

“I never…” you stopped, grabbing the fabric on your left pant leg, “no one knows about this, please don’t tell anyone. It—” you took a deep breath, steadying your voice, “It was too bad on this side, Bradley.”

You lifted the leg of your pants up, revealing the secret to him and only him. Staring down at your leg, or lack thereof, the exposed metal appendage was finally out in the open for him to see. You felt like you were going to collapse, your hands were shivering so much you felt like jello. 

The sound of Bradley standing from the bed didn’t stir you from your staring contest with your shoe. Bradley’s hand moved in front of your face to cup your chin like he did earlier, lifting your eyes to meet his. Neither of you expected the other to be crying, but tears fell from both of your eyes. Bradley smiled softly at you, and leaned down to kiss your cheek tenderly. He put his forehead against yours, closing his eyes.

“I think that you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen in my entire life, did you know that?” he whispered, his voice was so quiet but rang like music in your ears. He pulled his head away from you and opened his eyes, wiping the tears that had fallen from yours. 

You leaned back up to kiss him, and the energy you two shared was totally different now. He kissed you so delicately and so lovingly that his mustache tickled you and he could have dissolved into you like sugar. You lifted the hem of his shirt, and he pulled it over his dirty blond hair, his skin was warm and smooth underneath. Wrapping you in his arms, he resumed kissing you, deepening it. You pulled back to remove your blouse, unbuttoning it and dropping it to the floor. Bradley spun you around and laid you on the bed once again. He kissed your neck, whispering to you how beautiful you were with every loving touch he gave you. Unbuttoning your jeans and pulling them off, he kissed your legs too. When you removed the appendage, he pressed one delicate kiss in particular on the knee of your left leg. Bradley’s kisses were felt all over your body, and you completely believed you would never feel self conscious again.

*****

Around three in the morning, the sound of your phone buzzing from the kitchen counter woke you. Quietly, to not wake Bradley, you slipped out of bed and hastily put his shirt and your underwear on. You reached for your leg, quickly slipping it on. Your phone had stopped ringing before you could answer it, but when you saw Maverick’s name under missed calls, you immediately called him back.

“Zippy,” he answered, clearly in a frenzy.

“Maverick, it is three in the morning, what is going on?” you whispered, moving to step barefoot, singular, outside onto your porch.

“Listen, I need help and you’re the only person I trust to do it. Cyclone is removing me from the mission,” he explained, and your eyes widened. If Mav got removed, there was no doubt that they would all die.

“Go on,” you prompted him, prepared for whatever it was he was asking you to do. 

Maverick explained his plan to you, which was perfectly… Maverick. 

“You want me to do WHAT?” you shouted into the phone, you then covered your own mouth, afraid of waking Bradley. You were not prepared for that.

“It’s just a little favor,” he said, sarcasm seeping in, “I’ll see you at 0800 on the dot.” 

The beeping of the phone alerted you that Maverick had ended the call, and that it was not up for negotiation. This was too far, what he was asking you to do. This was unacceptable. This… This was insane, and yet he knew you were the only one dumb enough to do it, but also the only other person who could do it. Cursing the Captain out, you went back inside and back to bed, Rooster snoring gently next to you. 

*****

Bradley had gotten up to leave before you woke up, and he had kissed your forehead and left quietly. As soon as you heard the door shut, your eyes flew open and you fell to the floor, looking for a box under your bed.

Where is it? Mav needs it, I need it, where is it? AHA!

You took account of all the items in the box, and got dressed for the day. It wasn’t your usual attire. Were you about to help a dismissed man steal a multi-million dollar jet? Maybe. Could this be your last day not in federal prison? …also maybe. 

You made absolutely sure none of your neighbors saw you leave that morning. The last thing you needed were witnesses.

*****

0800 finally came, and everyone was sitting in the briefing room, Cyclone standing in front of them. Rooster was surprised not to see Maverick this morning.

“Captain Mitchell is no longer your instructor,” the Admiral began, and Rooster was a bit taken aback. 

“As of today there are new mission parameters,” Cyclone continued, “Time to target is now four minutes. You’ll be hitting the valley level, at reduced speeds, not to exceed 420 knots.”

Everyone looked around, bewildered by the sudden change. Every pilot in the room was thinking the same thing, and finally someone spoke up.

“But sir, won’t we be giving time for their planes to intercept?” Bob asked, concerned.

“Well, Lieutenant, you have a fighting chance against enemy aircraft, what are the odds of surviving a head on collision with a mountain?” Cyclone retorted. Rooster looked around at the other faces in the room, worry painted on all of them.

“You’ll be attacking the target from a higher altitude, level with the north wall. It will be harder to keep your laser on target but you will avoid the high G climb out,” that was the nail in everyone’s coffin. There was no way there wouldn’t be a dogfight involved with all the coddling these new plans were giving. Maverick was reckless and dangerous, but his plan had been the best option.

That's when the chime alerted everyone of an aircraft on screen, the focus being turned to the display in the room. Rooster leaned forward in his seat.

“F/A-18 Single” Rooster read the label to himself, “no name.”

“Who the hell is that?” Cyclone demanded.

“Maverick to range control, entering point Alpha, confirm green range,” Maverick stated over the radio. Rooster couldn’t believe it.

“Uh.. Maverick, range control.. Uh green range is confirmed, I don’t see an event scheduled for you, sir,” the tower responded to him, stumped.

“Well, I’m going anyway,” Maverick informed. 

“Nice,” Phoenix whispered, only to herself. 

This was Maverick. 

Everyone in the room sat on the edge of their seats.

Another chime rang through the speakers, and another single popped up on the screen, not far behind.

“What the–'' Cyclone stuttered, and Rooster started to think the exact same thing to himself. Everyone was here, so who was that?

“Range control, identify yourself,” the tower demanded. No answer. Everyone looked at each other. Then the speakers crackled.

“Zippy to range control, entering point Alpha,” your voice crackled in, the headset in your helmet having gone unused for the past two years. 

“Holy shit,” Rooster said aloud once it clicked, and Phoenix looked at him with the same surprise on her face. 

No fucking way.

*****

“Setting time to target two minutes and fifteen seconds,” Maverick stated through the radio, “Final attack point, Maverick is inbound.” 

“Time to target, two minutes and fifteen seconds, Zippy inbound,” you stated into your mask. 

Following Maverick’s every move, you pushed the throttle forward and rolled your jet to the left, in precise synchronization with the Captain in front of you. Inverted, the two of you came down at the same angle, lowering into the route of the canyon. 

The turns were harsh on you, having been out of practice for two years, but you kept up with Maverick smoothly. Because you had been simulating the second position in the mission, wingman, you were slightly behind him. There was maybe a distance of fifteen total seconds between you both. You kept your abdomen tight, breathing hard at every turn. Not one of the graduates had been able to complete this course on time, and you were matching Maverick for every turn he made. You were his equal, and he almost couldn’t believe what he was seeing.

On one particularly hard turn, you gritted your teeth, but kept the Captain in your sights at all times. When you both started on the straight shot towards the mountain, you prayed.

Maverick’s voice crackled through your headset, and although you couldn’t hear him, you knew what was coming next. 

You pulled the flaps on your jet down, pulling up into a fifty plus degree climb, several G’s of pressure crushing your body already. 

“Bomb’s away,” you heard Maverick call over the radio.

God, you missed this.

When you reached the correct altitude, you flipped over, inverting your aircraft to begin the sharp descent downwards. Righting yourself just in time to see the small box blow into splinters, you realized you had to hit the dead center of the target with no other box to shoot. 

Maverick was already making the climb out over the invisible mountain, while you took aim. Your own missiles followed suit. 

“Bombs away,” your voice crackled in over the radio. 

As soon as you had dropped them, you began your own climb out, pulling up to ten G’s. Your vision tunneled in around itself, and you were shouting to fight off the darkness that threatened to consume you. 

“Bullseye!” you heard over the radio, just as you met the altitude of the mountain peak. 

Leveling out, you let your head rest against the back of the seat and remove your oxygen. Maverick was pulling up next to you, looking at you through the glass of the canopy. 

“You alright?” he called, concerned. That's when you laughed harder than you had in two years, snorts mixing their way in.

“I missed this,” you grinned over at him. 

“Thank you,” he nodded, his voice full of deep appreciation for what you had done for him. He needed to prove that it could be done to save their lives, and you were tired of feeling like you no longer mattered. 

“It’s a shame I never got to kick your ass up here,” you teased, and you could see his smile from where you sat.

“We need to head back,” he pointed out, and you knew it was time too.

The two of you turned to the right, wordlessly in agreement that you had done whatever you could and that you had to face whatever was waiting for you back on the tarmac.

*****

It had started to rain, just as you landed your jet and taxied in behind Maverick. Now that you were on the ground, your leg was starting to ache. It wasn’t debilitating, but you felt like you needed a cane. 

When the canopy was opened and you had unbuckled, you waved Maverick over to you. Security had been waiting for the two of you upon arrival. Maverick helped you out of the cockpit, and you climbed down the ladder. 

Your face was twisted in pain and discomfort as you held onto him, your arm thrown over his shoulder. The guards directed you into the building, and inside you could hear a pin drop. While making your way to the Admirals office, you spotted Bradley, who could only hold your gaze for a few seconds before you had rounded the corner. He looked concerned from the way your arm was thrown over Maverick’s shoulders. 

Once you and Pete had arrived at your destination, you stood on your own. Despite the pain, you wanted to face Cyclone the way you felt you had to. You and Maverick adopted similar stances, arms at your sides, looking ahead. 

“You have put me in a difficult position, Captain,” Cyclone opened, staring out the window. Warlock stood next to Maverick. Despite the deep shit you were in, you didn’t regret it one bit. 

“On the one hand, you have demonstrated that this mission can be flown. Perhaps the only way it could be survived,” he said, impressed. “On the other hand, you did it by stealing a multi-million dollar military aircraft and flying it in such a manner that it may never be airworthy again.” The only sound in the room was the rain hitting the windows, then Cyclone continued, “Iceman is no longer here to protect you.” You heard Maverick sigh next to you. 

Low blow.

“I have everything I need to have you court martialed and dishonorably discharged, and you,” he pointed in your direction, “sent to federal prison for the exact same reason he is here.” 

The rain resumed its main role as filler noise while the Admiral thought it through, “So what do I do? Risk the lives of my pilots, and perhaps the success of this mission, or risk my career?” he asked, “By appointing you team leader.” 

Maverick perked up, and your heart jumped into your throat. 

“Zippy, you will accompany them onto the carrier. We have had the best of the best fly here for the past few weeks and I hate to say it but you have shown that you are more than capable of handling that aircraft even after your discharge. Do not make this a sore spot on my career,” he ordered, and you nodded. 

“Both of you are dismissed,” he finalized, and Maverick and yourself turned from the room. Neither of you spoke of anything until you were in your office, the door closed behind you. You collapsed to the floor and Maverick looked at you in concern

“Holy shit, Mav,” you said, the stress not gone, but most of it better, “how the fuck–” 

“I have no idea, Zip,” he answered, stunned. 

“I know there's a chance we’ll die, but… we have a fighting chance now, Mav.”

He looked at you sadly, and that told you everything you needed to know. You trusted Maverick’s instincts more than any other man or woman here. Nodding, you put out your hand for the Captain to help you up, and you gave him a hug. He hugged you right back. 

The two of you decided to call it a night, having other things to attend to before tomorrow.

*****

You had texted Bradley, too afraid to talk to him over the phone, and when you arrived back at your house, he was already waiting for you in the driveway. You got out of your car, your old flight suit still on and a bright purple helmet in your hands. 

“What the fuck was that?” he practically yelled, pointing a finger at you. 

“What, you don’t steal multi-million dollar planes in your free time?” you asked him innocently and he stopped in his tracks. 

“No– are you crazy! What made y–” you cut him off with your next words.

“They put me on the carrier tomorrow Bradley,” you murmured, seriousness seeping into your tone. The worry and sadness in your eyes was too much for him and he wrapped you in a crushing hug, your helmet falling into the grass next to you. 

“I won’t let anything happen to you, Zip,” he promised, and you grabbed the back of his shirt in an attempt to hold on to him as tightly as humanly possible. 

When you first arrived back in Fightertown, USA, you wanted nothing more than to die. You wanted to crumble into dust and be swept away by the wind. But now you had something to live for, a possible future with meaning and it was all being taken away from you. Isn’t life cruel?

Tag list for this series: @kyjoraven @n3ssm0nique @18crazybutcutealsopsycho @yourphinphan81 @roosterschanelslut @sadpetalsstuff @herladyshipxx @datingbtr @americaarse @mobiusismyfav

[whyareyouhere66]

Haikyuu Characters as Quotes From My Life

S O

Basically, this chapter is just some of the Haikyuu characters as quotes that me, my friends, and even some of my classmates have said. Yeah, it's simple as that. They don't really make sense *the quotes*, even with context so yeah lol.

----

-*-* "Christian Grey may be 50 shades of fucked up- but I'm 50 shades of 'I'm gonna whoop your ass" -Kuroo

-*- *"I think I have a crush on Pennywise." -Tanaka

-*-* "If only men had brains and balls, at the same time." -Kiyoko

-*-* "No Im not gonna eat my cat, I'm not a cannibal." -Nishinoya

-*-* " I look like a warthog and have the personality of a she-devil." -Yamamoto

-*-* "See, I told you Megan, my boobs are getting bigger." -Asahi

-*-* "Do you have gum in your pocket or are you just excited to see me?....I think you're excited to see me." -Oikawa *to Iwaizumi, most likely*

-*-* "Tell me a good song- and we're not listening to the trolls soundtrack." -Ushijima *talking to Tendou*

-*-* "If I write my essay about Fortnite and global warming what will I get?" -Bokuto

-*-* "I once had a guy walk up to me at target and he was like 'wanna buy some ball wash?'" -Terushima

-*-* "Ryan Reynolds is hot." -Ennoshita

-*-* "Jeff Bezos would be a great drug dealer." -Kenma

-*-* "Ugh that's nasty....gonna give us fricking herpes..." -Akaashi

-*-* "HE HAD TWO GLIZZIES" -Bokuto

-*-* "It looks like pennywise could crawl out of that things butthole." -Hinata

-*-* "I just got winky faced by Kahoot." -Tsukishima

-*-* "I'm gonna get fax paper, and make cards that say "we give free bj's" and tape it on peoples doors." -Kuroo

-*-* "If I have to listen to another minute of JoJo Siwa I will lose my mind." -Daichi

-*-* "YOU CLOSED MY DUOLINGO TAB?!" -Nishinoya

-*-* "Can any orgasms so photosynthesis...?" -Kageyama

-*-* "My shoulder is no longer a virgin." -Yamaguchi

-*-* "Don't change, we hate you just the way you are." -Iwaizumi

-*-* "Mom can you leave so I can curse at my friends?" -Sugawara *talking to Ukai*

-*-* "We thought there was cum in the bathroom." -Tanaka

-*-* "I don't like purple, I like ducks" -Hinata

-*-* "The bible is not smut, bitch." -Kenma (I'm sorry if anyone finds this offensive-)

-*-* "Mort I cannot 'move it move it' anymore" -Yamomoto

-*-* "They kill pears- that's why it's so sad. But pineapples stay alive, pears just- die!!" -Bokuto

-*-* "Not gonna lie man but your toes are...dry." -Tanaka

-*-* "That's like going up to a police officer holding up a bag and going, "hey can you step outside for a minute, go down and get some coffee, I should be done in about 15 minutes?" -Kindaichi

-*-* "I swear to god I will turn this- this navy blue van around!!" -Daichi/Ukai

-*-* "Nah he's got little-man-itis." Tsukishima *talking about Hinata, ofc*

-*-* "Don't we have a leader in the real world?" *Bokuto, continue to next quote *

-*-* "Yeah we've got Michael Jackson." -Kuroo *that one was a 2-parter haha*

-*-* "YOU'LL BELIEVE GOD IS A WOMENNNN- is that vodka??" -Nishinoya

-*-* "It's probably like, burnt fire or something." -Oikawa

-*-* "Why do you not like shirtless men." -Tanaka

-*-* "I'm gonna start a petition to make Boston a continent....or maybe New Jersey." -Hinata

-*-* "We've known eachother since the 1800's- we went to Travis Scott concerts with George Washington." -Tanaka *talking abt Yamamoto*

-*-* "Dame cabeza" -Tanaka

-*-* "No one likes Jacobs, Jacobs are ugly and raspy." -Tsukishima

:D

K great, so anyways-

Idk that's all I got rn, y'all got a free glimpse of my strange friends and even stranger school. Hope you enjoyed and adios

edit: holy shit this blew up a lot faster than I expected- thanks so much y’all