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#WHY DO THE NUMBERS APPEAR SO BIG
kumeko · 7 months
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Prompt: I like the war phase of 3 Houses so much for these 2. Something filled with yearning (or the crescendo of the yearning). I like the idea of them liking each other so much but not pursuing until "things are settled", or whatnot. Being scared of losing them. Best friends who pine. Anything like that.
A/N: For LucyGringe for the @claudelethgifts.  I love pining and ahh, these two just spending the war phase yearning is chef’s kiss, I can only hope I wrote it well. I feel like Claude would know it’s mutual, while Byleth would be a bit more in the dark (even to her own feelings). Does that make it harder? Easier?
It was a bit hard to figure out how to connect this until I went for a “five times he grabbed her hand and the one time she grabbed his” format.
0
The ring weighed heavily in his pocket.
1
They were in the middle of a war, a simple fact that Claude had to remind himself of over and over again. He’d spent five years in this war, had fought and bled and killed as the months and years passed.
Despite that, it was all too easy to forget the calluses on his fingers as he walked in the forest. Around him, his former classmates chattered, dappled in shadow and light, and if he squinted, he could almost see their teenage selves. They could be returning from a class mission instead of a bloody battle.
It was all Byleth’s fault.
Claude peeked at the woman by his side. She didn’t look a day older than when she’d disappeared. Maybe he’d slipped back in time, turning back the clock to when the worst opponents he’d faced were bandits instead of former allies. When he could justify the blood that had stained his hands.
He wasn’t the only one feeling this way. A jovial mood filled the air as his friends reunited for the first time in years. Leoni led the pack, smirking as she taunted Hilda and Lorenz. “Your attacks were sloppy.”
“As though yours were refined.” Lorenz scrunched his nose. Despite the mud and blood streaking his robes, he still held a dignified aura about him.
“Ugh, you’re making me agree with him,” Hilda bit out, grumpy. She snapped at Leonie, “That’s really the first thing you say to me in months?”
Behind them, Ignatz rubbed his neck shyly as he glanced at Marianne. “It’s nice to see you again.”
Marianne flushed and gave a soft smile. “M-me too. I think so too.”
“I missed you guys!” Raphael shouted as he wrapped his arms around Ignatz and Lysithea, dragging them into his embrace. Somehow, he’d grown bigger, more muscular, a feat that Claude hadn’t thought possible.
And on the exact opposite end of the spectrum, Lysithea hadn’t even gained an inch. She hissed, “Get off me, you big oaf!”
Though he’d never admit it aloud, Claude had missed this banter. There wasn’t really any room for it when all of Fódlan was in flames. And he wasn’t the only one to think so—from the corner of his eye, Claude watched as Byleth’s lips twitched, her expression softening as she studied her former students. A far cry from the old days, when she’d been hard to read.
Or maybe he’d just gotten better at it.
“Whatcha thinking, Teach?” Claude asked, the old moniker slipping off his tongue out of habit. He hadn’t said her nickname in ages and yet, it was impossible to think of her without it.
“It’s really been five years,” Byleth replied, finally turning away from the group to him. Her eyes widened slightly, as though realizing something.
She’d left an easy opening, and he couldn’t resist. “I couldn’t tell looking at you.”
Byleth didn’t seem to hear him. “You’re taller.”
“That’s old news now, Teach,” Claude teased. Their growth spurts had come and gone, and he’d almost forgotten how short he’d used to be, how they’d used to be on the same eye level. “Is that all you noticed?”
“No…” Byleth studied him, overly serious for a throwaway comment. Whatever she saw, she frowned. “You know battle now.”
“You’ve seen me fight before.” Claude raised a brow, not quite following.
She pursed her lips, considering her words before replying, “You know of war.”
He wondered if it was that obvious. He wondered what signs he’d shown, that they’d all shown.
He wondered when she’d first learned the lessons he kept learning every day.
“In ways I wish I hadn’t,” Claude replied wryly. He glanced at his friends in front of him. Even the way they walked was different, their steps quieter, their bodies tense. They were always ready for a fight these days. “Maybe we can keep up with you now.”
“I liked it better when you couldn’t,” Byleth replied honestly, clenching her fist.
“Me too.” But if Claude had wanted easy and comfortable, he would have gone home to Almyra, leaving Fódlan to clean up its own messes. Or maybe he’d have never crossed those mountains in the first place. “But it’s our choice.”
Byleth’s frown deepened as she clenched her fists tighter. Despite her feelings, she didn’t say anything, just walking quietly next to him. Rocks and twigs crunched underfoot, the rest of his old classmates’ bickering fading into a soft murmur.
This wasn’t how he wanted Byleth’s first day back to go. There was plenty of bad to deal with as it was. If only for now, if only for this moment, he wanted her to be happy.
Reaching down, he wrapped his hand around her balled fist, squeezing lightly. “Glad you’re back, Teach.”
Byleth glanced down, then at him. Her eyes were as green as the forest and she offered a rare smile. “Me too.”
Something in him tightened at her expression.
Before he could say anything, he heard shouts in the distance.
“Another fight?” Hilda complained, readying her axe.
“That’s what war is,” Claude quipped as he reluctantly let go of Byleth’s hand. “You survive one fight just to get into another one.”
2
If the rest of Fódlan was still in the middle of a war, the monastery was stuck in the aftermath of one. Even now, years later, it was still a mess of rubble and scorched bricks, the academy no longer the same as it had been in his youth. The rebuilding had been slow, with only key structures needed to house their soldiers rebuilt. Wild flowers and grasses grew along familiar paths, nature reclaiming what had been abandoned.
If it was this hard for him to see, he could only imagine how much harder it was for her. Dismayed, Byleth trailed after him as he guided her to where the dorms used to be.
“We haven’t had time to clear this up,” Claude explained, a paltry excuse. Broken glass crunched underfoot and he winced. “Nor the resources.”
Byleth’s jaw tightened. “That’s war.”
“That’s war,” he agreed with a sigh.
As they passed by the pond, Byleth stopped by the dock. Kneeling, she reached over the side and skimmed her fingertips on the cold water. “It’s shallower.”
“It is?” Claude stared at the murky waters. He could just see their reflections. It had never been this quiet here before—even outside of the big fishing tournament, there had always been a few students hoping for a big catch. Flayn had almost drowned once, trying to use her hands instead of her rod, and Seteth had almost banned everyone from getting within a meter of the shoreline. “Good eye, Teach.”
“It’s not my eye.” Byleth stood, wiping her hands on her pants. “It was just yesterday for me.”
“Yesterday…” Part of Claude still couldn’t believe she’d slept through the past five years. Despite all he’d seen, it still felt too fantastical, too magical. But there had been nothing logical about how she’d disappeared and returned, about how her hair turned green or even how she always seemed to already know when an attack was coming.
More importantly, he couldn’t deny the truth in front of him. Byleth really hadn’t aged a day since he’d last seen her. Her knowledge of the present was abysmal and even hermits knew of the current state of affairs.
“Then maybe you can help with the rebuilding,” Claude suggested, keeping his voice carefully upbeat. He nodded in the direction of the main hall. “Lysithea hasn’t found the blueprints and it’s a little harder for the rest of us to remember where everything was.”
“I thought there weren’t enough resources?” she asked.
“This is headquarters now.” Claude gestured at the academy behind him. “And you’re Rhea’s heir apparent, or so the true believers say, so…might as well. It’ll help raise morale.”
“…Rhea.” Byleth bit her lip, glancing at the direction of the church. Despite Edelgard’s best efforts, it still stood strong, the towering walls peeking over the rest of the academy. “Is…my father…”
Claude knew what she meant. “He’s still there,” he answered gently.
“Ah.” Claude could guess what she meant. “He’s still there.”
“Good.” While she didn’t run, Byleth’s pace picked up as she headed toward the academy’s graveyard. Luckily, the battle had managed to avoid most of it, leaving Jeralt’s marker untouched by the forces of war or the tides of time.
Well, not entirely. Weeds grew around the gravestone. He’d have to make sure to clear this out later.
Not minding the overgrown grass or mud, Byleth knelt in front of the marker, her fingers gently brushing her father’s name. “It all happened so fast,” she murmured, her fingers tracing the a. Her eyes were dry. “Too fast.”
In more ways than one. Claude remembered losing Byleth once, remembered her returning, remembered the earth disappearing underneath his feet as she vanished once more. There had been little time when it had all gone down. Jeralt had died. Edelgard had betrayed them. Dimitri had gone mad.
He’d spent five years with regrets, his chest heavy with all the things he’d never said.
And now Byleth had survived and he still couldn’t say them.
“Now’s the time to go slow,” he said instead, kneeling next to her. Had he always been this much of a coward? He covered her hand with his. “I’m here, if you need me.”
3
Claude grinned as he sat down in his old seat in the Golden Deer classroom. The layout was different, but there were still tables and chairs, still a blackboard and a desk, and that was more than enough to feel like he was back in class. Out of all the repairs, he had looked forward to this one the most.
For almost a year, this classroom had been a home of sorts.
“It’s been ages since I sat here,” he said, sprawling across the table. It was still an uncomfortable spot for a nap, but if he turned his head just so, he could discretely watch Byleth as she examined the room.
She ran her fingers along the desks before approaching the blackboard. “What will this be used for now?”
“Nothing much,” Claude admitted. If he closed his eyes, he could smell chalk in the air, hear the chatter of his classmates. “Strategy meetings, I guess. Leonie and Raphael just couldn’t stand seeing it destroyed so they fixed it up whenever they had the free time.”
Byleth pressed her hand to the blackboard. She didn’t look at him as she asked, “And the other rooms?”
He had never spent too much time in the other classrooms, but he could still picture them now. The crimson red of the eagles, the vibrant blue of the lions—Dimitri’s flustered smile when he was teased, Edelgard’s sharp smirk whenever she had a comeback.
A better memory than Byleth’s sword, red from Edelgard’s blood, the tatters of Dimitri’s blue cape as he fought like a man possessed.
Regrets that he couldn’t think, let alone voice.
“They’re still in disrepair,” Claude finally replied, sitting up.
Byleth didn’t say anything but her shoulders slumped slightly. With a quiet sigh, she tapped the blackboard. “I never knew what to write when I was up here.”
Claude chuckled. “I could tell.” With how awkward her first few weeks as teacher, it was easy to tell how unprepared she was for it. “Why’d you accept the position?”
“I don’t know.” She turned around, her eyes meeting his. “I just felt…I had to. That something might change if I did. Why’d you ask me to come to your house?”
“Because I knew something might change if I did,” Claude echoed. Though, he had expected Fódlan or his house to change, not himself. Feeling mischievous, he grinned. “You know, we never finished our classes, Teach.”
“That…” She pondered, crossing her arms as she leaned against the board. “No, we didn’t.”
“And we didn’t really graduate,” Claude continued, walking over to her slowly.
She squinted at him, sensing a trap. “That’s true.”
“Then…” Claude smiled innocently. “Maybe you should give your last class. Just to wrap things up.”
Byleth shot him a dubious look. “…no one else is here.”
“It’s a private lesson,” he cajoled, ready to counter any objection. He grabbed her hand. “You wouldn’t leave a student in need, would you?”
“You don’t actually need it,” Byleth pointed out, but she couldn’t hide her own smile as she figured out his game. “You’re leading the army just fine.”
“For how long?” Claude wiped an imaginary tear. “What would my grandfather think about his uneducated heir? What about our men?”
“Fine.” It was faint, but he heard a laugh as she nodded. “Just one.”
4
It was strange to study again. Claude sat in the monastery’s library, a stack of books around him, the musty smell tickling his nose. Most of the library had survived the fire after the Adestrian Empire had attacked, from the books down to the literature, and he spotted more than a few doodles on the table from bored students decades past.
And in the book he was reading too. History made a good teacher for tactics, though someone hadn’t told the kid who’d drawn a stickman running on the bottom of the book. Repressing a sigh, he peeked over his book at his companion.
Next to him, Byleth hunched over the table, her brow furrowing as she examined the continent’s map. As a student, he’d never imagined learning with her. War and time had a funny way of making everyone equals. For all of her fighting expertise, Byleth had five years of geopolitical changes to catch up on before she could help spearhead any attacks.
Her knees knocked into his as she sat back to compare the map with an open book.
Claude grinned and tapped her shoulder. When she turned to him, blinking owlishly, he poked her forehead. “Don’t scowl too much. It’ll freeze like that.”
Her lips pursed as she considered his words. “How?”
Half a decade of sleep hadn’t made her any better with jokes. Claude shrugged and laughed. “I’m not sure, actually. It’s just something my mother used to say.”
“Oh.” She turned slightly, considering him. Her arm brushed his. Propping her chin on her hand, she asked idly, “Is that why you’re always smiling?”
“I wouldn’t say always,” he answered, mirroring her posture. It felt childish but when her lips quirked, he knew he’d made the right move. “But smiles work better than frowns. You can get more done.”
Byleth’s expression softened. “…Jeralt said something similar before.”
Claude winced. He hadn’t expected that landmine. “He did?”
“Yes.” Despite his fears, she didn’t appear down. Fondly, she recounted, “He used to say, ‘It’s easier to get clients and a bonus if you’re approachable.’”
Now that sounded like a mercenary’s advice. Claude laughed. “He wasn’t wrong.”
“He rarely was.” Byleth nodded. “I wasn’t very good at it.”
“You’re still not good at it,” he teased. “That’s what you have me for.”
She smiled. “Yeah, I do.”
He could only watch as she straightened and reached for her book once more. Byleth had always been blunt and straight to the point, but…this was something else. Something different. She smiled more. Talked longer. Sat closer. Even now, as she pulled her book closer, he could feel her proximity, the way her arms grazed his whenever she adjusted her position, the way her hand lingered when she handed him her map.
“Who has the Ordelia territory now?” she asked, looking at him with her bright green eyes. Even the way she looked at him had shifted to unfamiliar territory.
Claude had never thought of himself as a scholar, not in the way Lindhardt had been, but he knew Byleth well enough to write a paper.
And he knew this truth: She liked him.
Unfortunately, that led him to his second conclusion: he couldn’t push this any further. Not now, not with the weight of Rhea’s position on her shoulders, not with the fate of the war riding on their efforts.
“The empire, but it’s a little more tricky than that,” Claude replied, resisting the urge to grab her hand when she pulled back. “Never thought I’d be the one teaching you, Teach.”
He’d swallowed his words five years ago. He could do it again.
5
War killed; a fact that was all too real as Claude stared at the very injured Byleth. Lying on her cot in her tent, blood matting her hair to her face and staining her armour, she was barely conscious as Manuela took care of her. The older woman huffed as she chanted under her breath, her hands glowing as she healed the worst of Byleth’s wounds.
“You shouldn’t be in the vanguard like that,” Manuela barked, irritated as she inspected Byleth for further injuries. Despite her sharp tone, her hands were gentle as she poked and prodded.
“Someone has to be,” Byleth replied tiredly, raising a hand to cover her eyes. She groaned softly as Manuela touched a particularly tender spot.
“That someone isn’t you!” Manuela snapped, her touch turning rough from irritation as she finished checking Byleth. Claude had a feeling their wine inventory was about to miss a few bottles. “You’re too important to fight every mercenary that we cross. You’re our leader!”
“Claude is,” Byleth argued feebly.
Manuela snorted. “Please. Don’t try to wiggle your way out of this.”
Claude released a breath he didn’t know he was holding when Manuela straightened and stepped back. “All’s good?” he asked, somehow managing to keep his voice from cracking.
“For now.” Manuela crossed her arms and glared at Byleth. “If not for yourself, think of me! It’s tiring patching you up!”
Byleth gave her a flat stare before nodding. “I will.”
“Just do it. Why are all of my patients masochists?” Manuela groaned, running a hand through her hair. “Make sure you don’t overexert yourself—I fixed most of the injuries but there’s a few that need to heal naturally.”
“… yes.” Byleth agreed.
“Are you just saying that? I heard the hesitation!” Manuela whirled to Claude, fire in her eyes. He took a step back defensively as she jabbed his chest. “You. Make sure she gets her rest.”
He’d have done it even if she hadn’t asked. Claude forced a grin. “Aww, you trust me now?”
“Not a bit, but you’re better than her.” Manuela picked up her staff and stalked past Claude. “I’ll leave the rest to you.”
Claude winced as she stomped out, no doubt heading toward the supply tent. Well, just this once, he’d overlook it. It had been a bad fight. Their healers had worked overtime to the point even Lysithea had admitted she was tired.
And Byleth hadn’t so much as lifted her head since they’d brought her to her tent.
Despite the healing, she was still covered in blood, her minor scratches and injuries left untended. Manuela claimed that it promoted natural healing. He’d long suspected she was just too tired to do it all. Quietly, he perched on the cot next to her, trying and failing to put words to his feelings.
His heart was heavy. Heavier than his unsaid words, heavier than the ring that had sat in his pocket for the last few weeks.
Byleth lowered her hand, staring back at him. Her mouth opened, as though to say something, before she closed it once more.
Those eyes had almost closed forever. “That was dangerous.”
“War is dangerous,” she stated.
He tightened his jaw. She was alive and she was here and part of him had feared that this might be their last time together, that he’d just be left with his regrets. “You don’t have to make it more dangerous. The idea is to come home alive.”
Byleth’s brow furrowed. “I did.”
“This was close.” His voice caught in his throat. Keeping his hands from shaking, he squeezed her hand. She always fought close combat, sword in hand. As accurate as his arrows were, he could only pick off so many enemies before they approached her. All it took was one wrong move, one slip up, and she’d be too far for any aid.
And even Byleth couldn’t come back from death.
But he could tell from how her jaw set that there was no use in telling her that. Byleth was stubborn, ever her father’s daughter, and it would take more than a few words to change that. “Just…be careful,” he pleaded.
Her expression softened and she forced herself to sit up with a groan. Before he could move, she covered his hand with her own, sandwiching it between her palms. “I am, always.”
Her hands were still cold. Claude smiled wryly, not quite believing. “You better be.”
6
Tomorrow, the war would be over.
It was a strange thought. The nightmare of half a decade would soon be over. No, it had been longer than that—their enemy had existed centuries, making their mark in the annals of history. And now, a final one.
Win or lose, the world as they knew it would change after tomorrow.
Maybe that was why he’d convinced Byleth to take one last walk with him through the monastery’s grounds. She’d kept quiet for most of the walk, as they passed by familiar haunts. The repairs had patched up most of the school’s grounds; even the greenhouse’s panes were all replaced.
Byleth stopped in front of the Goddess tower. In the late evening, most of it was hidden in shadow, the upper floors almost impossible to see. Her expression was distant, hard to read. “Do you still not believe in the Goddess?”
“Does it matter?” he asked, standing next to her.
“No…just…” Byleth closed her eyes. “I suppose she wasn’t entirely a Goddess.”
She. Byleth spoke as though she’d known the Goddess. Perhaps she had. Even now, even after all this time, Claude only had question after question for Byleth. There was so much he didn’t know, so much he wanted to know.
But for now, he’d just start with this: “Do you have one now?”
“One what?” Byleth asked, perplexed.
“An ambition.” Claude grinned. “You said you didn’t really have one, back then.”
“Oh…” Byleth turned back to the tower, staring up. The wind blew softly through her hair, making her already messy hair messier. She turned back to him and nodded. “I do.”
“And you’re not going to tell me.” He sighed, faking a pout. “Well, I guess I do believe in her a little then.” When Byleth raised a brow, he covered his mouth in mock-horror. “Teach, don’t tell me you forgot our wish?”
“Oh.” Byleth rubbed her chin thoughtfully before realization crossed her eyes. “Right.”
Now he actually felt a little hurt. “Seriously?”
“Do you want to make another wish?” she asked as a way of apology.
Well, he couldn’t say no to that. Claude sighed. “What to wish for…to win the battle?”
“No,” Byleth said decisively. “We’re going to do that anyways.”
How was he supposed to disagree with that? Claude laughed. “Well, if you’re that confident…”
“For a brighter dawn,” Byleth said, her eyes locked on his.
“That’s poetic.”
“You told me that once.” She stared at the tower. “We’re going to make a better Fódlan.”
Her hand was close and if he wanted to, he could reach across and intertwine their fingers. No, not want, that wasn’t the right word—there was nothing more that he wanted. The ring was still in his pocket, the words stuck in his throat.
But to a fault, Claude had always been pragmatic.  As was Byleth.
And now was not the time.
“To a brighter dawn,” Claude said instead. “And this time, it won’t take five years.”
“It won’t.” To his surprise, Byleth turned and took his hand. “We still have that other promise.”
For once, she’d struck him speechless. “Promise?”
“You told me to save you a dance,” she said, gently chiding him. “Now who’s forgetting?”
He burst into laughter. “That’s fair.” Still clasping her hand, Claude bowed deeply. “Will you honour me with a dance, milady?”
If there was one thing Claude had learned, it was that now wasn’t forever. The ring weighed heavily in his pocket, but only for now. His words were stuck in his throat, but only for now.
Tomorrow, come hell or high water, he’d finally take that last step to her side.
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marciliedonato · 1 year
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Don't ask:
- a man, his salary
- A woman, her age
- And a tumblrina (gn) who they voted for in the nge/moomin poll....
#Releasing this from the drafts bc the poll ends at 9pm today#It's been real y'all we go down gracefully it's been an honor fighting with y'all in the Eva trenches 🫡🫡#Also why are pitting 2 bad bitches against each other#Like do ppl realize when they say 'moomin is for queer people' the lead of Eva is also literally a depressed bi like!#He should be doing numbers here on the depressed gay site come on. Yeah it was doomed by the narrative#But what is Romance without tragedy. Like man. What a trope (only talking abt the story not the authors obv)#Imagine hearing 'maybe I was born to meet you' from a divine being who sees all your faults#And how much you hate yourself and loves you unconditionally and intensely from the moment he lays eyes on you... I'M GONNA BE UNWELL#Regardless. Times are tough but we stay silly :3 let me be silly for a moment with u it ain't serious#Wow anna said something#Anna's shitposts#Nge#Eva#I just think they're wildly different in how they approach themes and it's weird and complicated to even compare them#One is lighthearted and comforting the other feels like being crushed by a thousand elephants both are important#We got far we deserved better than to lose bc of a bit everyone was committed to but. It's respectable. It all returns to nothing or smth#Edit: the sidenote is to differentiate between the fact one is not known for being queer media but it does have that#Despite it being so small in the story (the show at least but it's significant) and the other#Is obv queer media bc of the author and it's not in the story as far as ik but it's an accepting/inclusive story#Why do u think it got so big and a character that appeared once became one of the biggest*. It obv meant smth to ppl#*to the point he appeared more in the rebuilds and is all over in merch. ANYWAY SORRY FOR RANTING IN THE TAGS I GOT PASSIONATE OK
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arolesbianism · 6 months
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Horrible realization that if I go through with recollecting all the oni logs then I'll have to actually find out how to get "a seed is planted" like for realsies this time. Maybe I should just cheat them all in actually. <3.
#rat rambles#oni posting#a seed is planted sucks so bad its like my second favorite log and its been such a pain in the fucking ass to find#appearing then dissapearing so thourougly that I thought I might have made it up somehow making me learn to look into the god damn code to#find out if Im crazy or not only to find it along side all the story trait logs despite it being in the research notes section and Then I#open oni again to chech smth completely different and it fucking reapears out of nowhere and then the game updates and all my logs explode#this fucker has tormented me for so long and Ive seen no one else talk abt it so Im still not 100% convinced it wasnt a glitch somehow#it probably is a real log thats in the game and it disappearing is the glitch but boy do I have no way of knowing#if that is the case I can only imagine it relates to it seemingly having been intended as a story trait log#I assume it was moved to research notes because of how long it is but idk#anyways nails you motherfucker why must you have recorded one of the more lore heavy logs in the game and then made it a bitch to find#like genuinely I think its one of like 3 max logs that directly mention duplicants by name#ok ok there might be 4 I dont remember exactly#but two of those would be by jackie and one by probably nikola so nails mentioning them by name is a pretty big deal#and thats if Im remembering those logs correctly which I am likely not lol#its like 3 am ok#a seed is planted also just gives us some juicy lore relating to the actual tech we see in game#along with. that whole unnamed human subject thing. that still haunts me.#who are you subject whatever your number was and are you olivia specifically to spite me#if it wasnt for the b111-1 thing I wouldn't consider her that strong a canidate but it is a thing so she is#not only is she a strong candidate but shes like. one of like 3 real candidates we have for that#it's a weird case because it could very easily be a complete rando especially given the subject number instead of a work id being given#but also given its relation to dupes itd be weird if it wasnt someone who either worked at gravitas or otherwise got duped#which thankfully does free olivia of some possibility since as far as we know there are no olivia dupes lol#jorge and dr.holland are the other two main options in my minds eye but thats based on very little#dr.holland in particular would kind of vaguely make sense given hes mentioned in that story trait's artifact reward#but ofc given that nails does not choose to elaborate on that whole thing all I can do is blindly speculate#they also mention a name which is fun because its one of our rare complete randos in oni lore#now. he could easily be revealed to be some dupe but Im pretty sure the name was like bruce or smth so I dont consider it likely#also I am deeply curious of what this bruce guy was to nails given nails calls him 'my darling bruce'
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sweetnans · 4 months
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Katsuki always paid attention to little details even when you were only a number in his mind. You ended number seven on the charts after the tests for UA application. He memorized the first ten and then recognized each one of you on the first day of class.
Your ID photo that appeared beside your score wasn't nothing alike like you were in person.
He completely flipped.
He pushed the feeling aside because he had no time to waste on stupid things, and he succeeded for a long, long time. Bakugo ignored you, pretended that you didn't exist and the fact that you were part of Midoriya's group the first months made it easy for him to keep you far away but that also made it hard to watch.
Why were you laughing at what shitty Deku had said? That fucker wasn't that funny.
Why was your hand on Deku's hair ruffling and combing it with your fingers?
He was fuming on the inside.
When Mina started to hang out with you, he was relieved that he won't have to see you with Deku again.
But then, you started to hang out with his group, and everyone loved you instantly. Kirishima always wanted to sparr with you, Kaminari always asked for your help on math and Sero, fucking Sero always inviting you to dance with him.
After he saw the behavior of his friends when it came to you, he almost preferred you hanging out with Deku.
He noticed that you smiled brightly every time Kirishima told you one of his dumbs jokes while having you pinned down on the floor mat after a sparr, but you never laughed.
He noticed your leg trembling under the table when you studied with Kaminari in the common room. He could bet that the bastard used every chance he got to flirt with you in the most hideous way.
He also noticed your pink tinted cheeks every time Sero gave you his hand for a quick dance around the kitchen.
Almost like you were uncomfortable with their demeanor.
You were pretty. He understood that they were making their moves to you, but you were just too shy and good to say anything to them, like you weren't interested at all for example.
One night, he couldn't sleep and went straight to the kitchen of the dorms to grab a glass of water. He never expected seeing you there scrolling in your phone leaning by the sink, waiting for the toaster to pop your bread out.
"You shouldn't be eating carbohydrates this late"
He startled you. He literally appeared from the shadows of the dining room dragging his feet, making no sound at all.
"Jeez, you should wear a bell or something," you giggled when he gave you a puzzled look. "Like a cat? So next time I know that you're coming?"
"I know what you meant." he walked to you and grabbed a glass from the rack.
He felt your presence in his bones like a static pulse vibrating under his skin. Maybe it was just your quirk trying to reach for him.
"What are you doing here this late?" You asked clearing your throat while he gulped his water in one go.
"What does it seem like I'm doing?" He pourred another glass. He wasn't that thirsty. He just wanted to be there in silence with you for minutes, without his obnoxious friends.
Your toast popped out of the toaster, and you grabbed it, burning your fingers in the process.
"Shit, shit," you exclaimed, blowing some air at your fingers to ease the pain.
"C'mere shithead," he grabbed your hand and put it under the sink, letting the cold water flow.
"It's fucking freezing" you tried to pull your hand back but his grip tightened.
"What did you expect? You just burned your fucking fingers doing the dumbest shit I've ever seen"
You didn't know if it was the serious tone on his voice or the way that he was struggling with you stopping you from taking your hand out of the water, but something about the scene made you let out a laugh, a big one. He had never seen you laugh like that before.
"Are you laughing at me?"
That question only made it worse. You were absolutely parting yourself from laughter. He turned off the water and watched you wipe your tears.
"I'm sorry, you're not that funny," you said, returning to your normal state. He grinned.
You passed by his side fetching your toast and poured some jam.
"Do you want some jammie toast with that water of yours?" You asked, offering a half eaten toast.
"Sure." he took the toast, and in return, he gave you his half glass of water.
After that encounter, he noticed that every time his friends were around you, you always tried to find him, looking for exchange glances, giving him a subtle smile.
He started to show up at your study sessions with Kaminari, and he noticed that your legs stopped trembling because his presence was enough for Kaminari to keep his mouth shut.
He also began sparring with you on training sessions switching partner with Kirishima leaving him with Sato.
And everytime Sero tried to dance with you in front of everybody he grabbed your arm and guided you to the kitchen or his room with a lame excuse to get you out of the situation.
Fortunately, his friend read the room pretty well. The three of them enjoyed more watching him play his cards with you than putting themselves on a constant shame.
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dykepuffs · 7 months
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How Do I Make My Fictional Gypsies Not Racist?
(Or, "You can't, sorry, but…")
You want to include some Gypsies in your fantasy setting. Or, you need someone for your main characters to meet, who is an outsider in the eyes of the locals, but who already lives here. Or you need a culture in conflict with your settled people, or who have just arrived out of nowhere. Or, you just like the idea of campfires in the forest and voices raised in song. And you’re about to step straight into a muckpile of cliches and, accidentally, write something racist.
(In this, I am mostly using Gypsy as an endonym of Romany people, who are a subset of the Romani people, alongside Roma, Sinti, Gitano, Romanisael, Kale, etc, but also in the theory of "Gypsying" as proposed by Lex and Percy H, where Romani people are treated with a particular mix of orientalism, criminalisation, racialisation, and othering, that creates "The Gypsy" out of both nomadic peoples as a whole and people with Romani heritage and racialised physical features, languages, and cultural markers)
Enough of my friends play TTRPGs or write fantasy stories that this question comes up a lot - They mention Dungeons and Dragons’ Curse Of Strahd, World Of Darkness’s Gypsies, World Of Darkness’s Ravnos, World of Darkness’s Silent Striders… And they roll their eyes and say “These are all terrible! But how can I do it, you know, without it being racist?”
And their eyes are big and sad and ever so hopeful that I will tell them the secret of how to take the Roma of the real world and place them in a fictional one, whilst both appealing to gorjer stereotypes of Gypsies and not adding to the weight of stereotyping that already crushes us. So, disappointingly, there is no secret.
Gypsies, like every other real-world culture, exist as we do today because of interactions with cultures and geography around us: The living waggon, probably the archetypal thing which gorjer writers want to include in their portrayals of nomads, is a relatively modern invention - Most likely French, and adopted from French Showmen by Romanies, who brought it to Britain. So already, that’s a tradition that only spans a small amount of the time that Gypsies have existed, and only a small number of the full breadth of Romani ways of living. But the reasons that the waggon is what it is are based on the real world - The wheels are tall and iron-rimmed, because although you expect to travel on cobbled, tarmac, or packed-earth roads and for comparatively short distances, it wasn’t rare to have to ford a river in Britain in the late nineteenth century, on country roads. They were drawn by a single horse, and the shape of that horse was determined by a mixture of local breeds - Welsh cobs, fell ponies, various draft breeds - as well as by the aesthetic tastes of the breeders. The stove inside is on the left, so that as you move down a British road, the chimney sticks up into the part where there will be the least overhanging branches, to reduce the chance of hitting it.
So taking a fictional setting that looks like (for example) thirteenth century China (with dragons), and placing a nineteenth century Romanichal family in it will inevitably result in some racist assumptions being made, as the answer to “Why does this culture do this?” becomes “They just do it because I want them to” rather than having a consistent internal logic.
Some stereotypes will always follow nomads - They appear in different forms in different cultures, but they always arise from the settled people's same fears: That the nomads don't share their values, and are fundamentally strangers. Common ones are that we have a secret language to fool outsiders with, that we steal children and disguise them as our own, that our sexual morals are shocking (This one has flipped in the last half century - From the Gypsy Lore Society's talk of the lascivious Romni seductress who will lie with a strange man for a night after a 'gypsy wedding', to today's frenzied talk of 'grabbing' and sexually-conservative early marriages to ensure virginity), that we are supernatural in some way, and that we are more like animals than humans. These are tropes where if you want to address them, you will have to address them as libels - there is no way to casually write a baby-stealing, magical succubus nomad without it backfiring onto real life Roma. (The kind of person who has the skills to write these tropes well, is not the kind of person who is reading this guide.)
It’s too easy to say a list of prescriptive “Do nots”, which might stop you from making the most common pitfalls, but which can end up with your nomads being slightly flat as you dance around the topics that you’re trying to avoid, rather than being a rich culture that feels real in your world.
So, here are some questions to ask, to create your nomadic people, so that they will have a distinctive culture of their own that may (or may not) look anything like real-world Romani people: These aren't the only questions, but they're good starting points to think about before you make anything concrete, and they will hopefully inspire you to ask MORE questions.
First - Why are they nomadic? Nobody moves just to feel the wind in their hair and see a new horizon every morning, no matter what the inspirational poster says. Are they transhumant herders who pay a small rent to graze their flock on the local lord’s land? Are they following migratory herds across common land, being moved on by the cycle of the seasons and the movement of their animals? Are they seasonal workers who follow man-made cycles of labour: Harvests, fairs, religious festivals? Are they refugees fleeing a recent conflict, who will pass through this area and never return? Are they on a regular pilgrimage? Do they travel within the same area predictably, or is their movement governed by something that is hard to predict? How do they see their own movements - Do they think of themselves as being pushed along by some external force, or as choosing to travel? Will they work for and with outsiders, either as employees or as partners, or do they aim to be fully self-sufficient? What other jobs do they do - Their whole society won’t all be involved in one industry, what do their children, elderly, disabled people do with their time, and is it “work”?
If they are totally isolationist - How do they produce the things which need a complex supply chain or large facilities to make? How do they view artefacts from outsiders which come into their possession - Things which have been made with technology that they can’t produce for themselves? (This doesn’t need to be anything about quality of goods, only about complexity - A violin can be made by one artisan working with hand tools, wood, gut and shellac, but an accordion needs presses to make reeds, metal lathes to make screws, complex organic chemistry to make celluloid lacquer, vulcanised rubber, and a thousand other components)
How do they feel about outsiders? How do they buy and sell to outsiders? If it’s seen as taboo, do they do it anyway? Do they speak the same language as the nearby settled people (With what kind of fluency, or bilingualism, or dialect)? Do they intermarry, and how is that viewed when it happens? What stories does this culture tell about why they are a separate people to the nearby settled people? Are those stories true? Do they have a notional “homeland” and do they intend to go there? If so, is it a real place?
What gorjers think of as classic "Gipsy music" is a product of our real-world situation. Guitar from Spain, accordions from the Soviet Union (Which needed modern machining and factories to produce and make accessible to people who weren't rich- and which were in turn encouraged by Soviet authorities preferring the standardised and modern accordion to the folk traditions of the indigenous peoples within the bloc), brass from Western classical traditions, via Balkan folk music, influences from klezmer and jazz and bhangra and polka and our own music traditions (And we influence them too). What are your people's musical influences? Do they make their own instruments or buy them from settled people? How many musical traditions do they have, and what are they all for (Weddings, funerals, storytelling, campfire songs, entertainment...)? Do they have professional musicians, and if so, how do those musicians earn money? Are instrument makers professionals, or do they use improvised and easy-to-make instruments like willow whistles, spoons, washtubs, etc? (Of course the answer can be "A bit of both")
If you're thinking about jobs - How do they work? Are they employed by settled people (How do they feel about them?) Are they self employed but providing services/goods to the settled people? Are they mostly avoidant of settled people other than to buy things that they can't produce themselves? Are they totally isolationist? Is their work mostly subsistence, or do they create a surplus to sell to outsiders? How do they interact with other workers nearby? Who works, and how- Are there 'family businesses', apprentices, children with part time work? Is it considered 'a job' or just part of their way of life? How do they educate their children, and is that considered 'work'? How old are children when they are considered adult, and what markers confer adulthood? What is considered a rite of passage?
When they travel, how do they do it? Do they share ownership of beasts of burden, or each individually have "their horse"? Do families stick together or try to spread out? How does a child begin to live apart from their family, or start their own family? Are their dwellings something that they take with them, or do they find places to stay or build temporary shelter with disposable material? Who shares a dwelling and why? What do they do for privacy, and what do they think privacy is for?
If you're thinking about food - Do they hunt? Herd? Forage? Buy or trade from settled people? Do they travel between places where they've sown crops or managed wildstock in previous years, so that when they arrive there is food already seeded in the landscape? How do they feel about buying food from settled people, and is that common? If it's frowned upon - How much do people do it anyway? How do they preserve food for winter? How much food do they carry with them, compared to how much they plan to buy or forage at their destinations? How is food shared- Communal stores, personal ownership?
Why are they a "separate people" to the settled people? What is their creation myth? Why do they believe that they are nomadic and the other people are settled, and is it correct? Do they look different? Are there legal restrictions on them settling? Are there legal restrictions on them intermixing? Are there cultural reasons why they are a separate people? Where did those reasons come from? How long have they been travelling? How long do they think they've been travelling? Where did they come from? Do they travel mostly within one area and return to the same sites predictably, or are they going to move on again soon and never come back?
And then within that - What about the members of their society who are "unusual" in some way: How does their society treat disabled people? (are they considered disabled, do they have that distinction and how is it applied?) How does their society treat LGBT+ people? What happens to someone who doesn't get married and has no children? What happens to someone who 'leaves'? What happens to young widows and widowers? What happens if someone just 'can't fit in'? What happens to someone who is adopted or married in? What happens to people who are mixed race, and in a fantasy setting to people who are mixed species? What is taboo to them and what will they find shocking if they leave? What is society's attitude to 'difference' of various kinds?
Basically, if you build your nomads from the ground-up, rather than starting from the idea of "I want Gypsies/Buryats/Berbers/Minceiri but with the numbers filed off and not offensive" you can end up with a rich, unique nomadic culture who make sense in your world and don't end up making a rod for the back of real-world cultures.
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cheapshrimpysheep · 13 days
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Yuu Needs a Hug 2
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SUMMARY: What their comforting hugs are like when you're feeling sad or under the weather? And how would they behave if you started crying in their arms?
CHARACTERS: Scarabia (Kalim; Jamil); Pomefiore (Vil; Epel; Rook); Ignihyde (Idia; Ortho*) & Diasomnia (Malleus; Silver; Sebek; Lilia)
*Platonic
TAGS: Fluff; GN Reader; Comfort; Bullet Points; In a Relationship
WORD COUNT: An average of 370 words per character.
COMMENTS: When I feel a little sad and down, I often imagine these things to help me fall asleep. I thought you might like them too. 😘
(I don't know why I keep increasing the number of words as I go through the dorms.)
Yuu Needs a Hug 1 (Heartslabyul / Savanaclaw / Octavinelle)
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CONTEXT: This is what they would do if they were already in a relationship with you. Except for Ortho, he's more like a cute little brother.
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Of course Kalim already hugs you on a daily basis. And in public or private it is completely indifferent to him. His hugs range from casual (as if simply standing next to you wasn't an option) to loving and affectionate.
And it's more towards the latter that he tends to go for when you ask him for a hug. His arms completely wrapped around you, his cheek touching yours. His reassuring smile asking you what you need. "You can ask me for anything! You know that, right? Oh! I know! How about a carpet ride? Do you think that might help?"
Let's face it, he's not the type to cuddling with you while the two of you are lying on a couch resting (Jamil would love that, less work for him) No. He's the type to cuddling with you, yes, but lying on a flying carpet who knows how many meters from the ground. Or maybe lying in the Oasis if you show him that you're afraid of being that high without safety measures.
He will hug you like he never wants to let you go again. He will offer you fruits and other things to snack on, talk to you, etc.
If you happen to be so depressed to the point of crying, part of him will panic, but the big brother part of him will stop him from showing it so as not to worry you even more. He will hug you tighter and kiss your forehead and cheeks. “Don't worry, you can cry as much as you need. Everything will be fine in the end, you'll see.”
When your crying calms down or stops, he will take his magic pen and, with his water powers, make a rainbow appear over you. A way for him to try to make you smile again.
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Jamil ONLY hugs you in private. He hates being the center of attention and/or showing his feelings in public, especially affection. BUT when he hugs you when the two of you are alone and he can finally rest, his hugs are charmingly peaceful.
He loves to lay with you, wrapping his arms restfully around you. He's always stressed, but with you, he can rest, and his cuddles show that.
He likes both having him lay on top of you with his head on your chest, letting you play with his hair, and having you lay on top of him and him being able to caress your head. He's also not at all shy about giving you kisses, quite the opposite, he likes to be himself with you, even if it means being naturally seductive.
But when you are sad, he will restrict himself to being sensitive and reassuring. He will probably prepare your favorite food or dessert to make you feel better. And, while hugging you, kiss your forehead.
If you happen to be so depressed to the point of crying, he will panic a little (as you are used to seeing when Kalim does something that puts himself at risk) You're the one who's going to have to calm him down first before he can calm you down. “*Sigh* Please don't do this to me.” he'll say with a subtle pout, which might make you smile a little too. He will hug you tighter, something that is extremely rare for him, and let you cry all you need.
When your crying calms down or stops, he'll use his magic pen to bring tissues to you, so he doesn't have to move away from you. And as you wipe your tears, he will pat your head and say: "Whatever is worrying you, I'm sure it will pass." in a reassuring, loving voice that only you know.
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Vil just doesn't hug you in public because he's a public figure and he prefers not to be the target of gossip, much less involve you in it. He doesn't hide that you're in a relationship, but you know, the less people see about the two of you, the less headaches you'll have. If it weren't for this, he would have no problem showing his affection for you. So he just demonstrates it in private.
However, he is more of a kisser than a hugger. It's more characteristic of him to kiss your cheek, or hold your chin to kiss your lips, than to hug you. Which ends up making these comfort hugs even more special and exclusive.
He'll start hugging you standing up, but if you really want to sit down then he'll let you sit on his lap. This will probably wrinkle his clothes, but he knows his priorities, and you are at the top of his list right now.
Just like him, his hugs are delicate and elegant, but firm enough to convey the feeling of protection and care. One of the arms is always around your waist, while the other is always on the top of your back or on your head, to be close to your face. That way he can caress your cheeks. And he will always plant a kiss on your forehead here and there.
If you happen to be so depressed to the point of crying, you’ll probably have the reflex to move away so as not to stain his clothes, and apologize. But at that moment you will feel his hand, stopping you from moving away. “Don't be silly.” he will tell you “And honestly, it hurts me a little that you think I value my clothes, which can simply be washed, more than you.” And he will encourage you to cry on his shoulder, remaining calm and understanding.
When your crying calms down or stops, he'll get all the tissues he needs and start explaining all the steps of a facial cleansing routine for when you cry. If you ask him how he knows so much about it he will answer you with a smile: "My sweet potato, don't tell me you think I never cry."
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In public, Epel likes to hug you as a way of showing off your relationship. But cute, comforting hugs? These are only for when you are alone.
This is one of those moments when you bring out his prideful side. You wanting him to be the person who comforts you when you're sad is a way of showing that you see strength and reliability in him, right? And it makes him proud of himself and happy that you can feel safe with him.
He will be extremely sweet and cute with you. He knows that this is what makes other people, especially you, more calm and comfortable.
He doesn't like hugging you standing up, especially if you're taller than him, even if it's just 1cm. But, the same, or worse, happens if he lets you sit on his lap, so it's most likely that he'll sit next to you. OR if you can and want, he prefers to lie with you with your head on his chest. If you're shorter than him, scratch everything, he'll hug you in any way.
After a while, he will probably get distracted by something else that doesn't stop the two of you from holding each other, like reading a book or studying a little.
If you happen to be so depressed to the point of crying, he'll panic a little, to the point of asking you what's going on in his dialect that you barely understand. What he needs to know most is if you're crying because of him. He'll be very relieved to know it wasn't him, and will hug you tighter.
When your crying calms down or stops, he will ask you how you are feeling and suggest that you two do something he used to do with his grandmother or his parents when he was also sad and needed to feel better.
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Few things are as indifferent to Rook as showing his love for you in public as he does in private (with just a few reservations). So he will hug you whenever you ask, regardless of where you are, so be careful when and where you ask.
Despite everything, it's rare for him to kiss or hug you. It's not that he doesn't like it, quite the contrary, he likes doing these two things so exclusive and special that he ends up keeping them as a "reward" for the two of you.
But this case is an exception to his love game. After all, one of the players is injured.
His comforting hugs are full of love and care, yet gentle despite so much emotional intensity. He will gladly hug you however you wish, standing, sitting on his lap, lying under the shade of a tree or anything else, even if unusual, he will do it with pleasure.
And of course he will use his charming and flattering vocabulary to try to help with your emotional recovery.
If you happen to be so depressed to the point of crying, you will feel the surprise in his body, and he will hold your face with both hands to gently move you away from his chest and look at your face. If you try to hide your face he will say: “Oh non, trickster! Such a display of feelings is beautiful. Such a neglected and hidden beauty. Please allow me to appreciate it for a moment.” he will caress your cheeks with his thumbs “I promise this will only make me love you more and better.” and he will kiss your cheeks, also tasting the saltiness of your tears.*
He is extremely patient and will do nothing but hug and cuddle you until your crying stops completely and/or you are the one who breaks the hug when you feel better.
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It's OBVIOUS that Idia doesn't hug you in public. He can barely SHOW UP in public. All your hugs, kisses, flirting, etc. are TOP SECRET!
He loves it when you sit on his lap while he is at the computer, especially when he is playing. You can sit however you want, but what he loves most is when you have your back to the computer, your chest against his, your legs behind the chair and your head lying on his shoulder. Or your chin on his shoulder while you play on your phone. The naturalness and relaxation with which he has you close to him like this is quite reassuring.
1000% chance he created a new chair with a design that both of you are comfortable in that position.
There's a good chance he'll simply respond "Same..." if you mention that you're sad or depressed. If you laugh, he might say "Hey, weren't we supposed to be sad together? Traitor! You literally just did the IRL version of sending a crying emoji while you were actually laughing behind the screen. Like, who does that? What is socially accepted is for you to pretend you are happy when you are sad.” And if this makes you laugh even harder: “Stop laughing! It's contagious! Hee hee hee.”
If you happen to be so depressed to the point where you suddenly start crying on his shoulder, he will PaNiC! He’ll immediately let go of the mouse and keyboard and hug you! “WHAT?! WHAT DID I DO?!” You'll have to calm him down first before he can "try" to calm you down.
He will completely understand, even if you don't even know why you're crying. But he won't know how to console you and he'll admit it. He will simply hug you, not tighter but more affectionately. And bury his face in your shoulder too, and whisper a muffled: "...Same...".
You'll probably laugh at the same time as you'll be frustrated with him. “It's true!” he’ll say “Why do you always laugh when I share my sadness with you?!” he says knowing it's not true “What do you mean the WAY I say it? ... Weirdo~” he says smiling.
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Unfortunately Ortho cannot hug you. At least not how he would like. The flame in his chest can burn you, and the heat exhaust ports too.
The first time he saw you sad and in need of a hug, he was also sad for being unable to hug you and then he had an idea: "Let's ask my brother to make huggable gear!"
“What do you want me to do? A teddy bear gear or something?” Idia will say, but then he will realize that if he does it HE will also be able to hug Ortho. “I’m on it!”
If Idia starts working on it, but for some reason he runs out of motivation because he thinks it's boring or a useless gear, Ortho will choose one of the following 2 options: A) convince him to do it because he reeeeeally wants to hug you and his big brother. Or B) He will say that if Idia doesn't do it, whenever you are sad Ortho will force him to be the one to hug you.
"I wouldn't mind that much..." Idia whispers. "What?" Ortho asks. "NOTHING, Nothing... I’ll make the gear."
After Gear is ready, whenever you feel sad and need a hug, Ortho will be very happy. "YAY!!! HUG GEAR TIME!!!" and will take you to Ignihyde to change gear.
Your comfort hugs will end up being three-way hugs because Idia also wants to hug his little brother. And maybe after a while he'll start hugging you too?
Ortho will also suggest you play with him to cheer you up. That and he also loves playing with you. And suggest other ways to cheer someone up, which he found on the internet.
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Malleus has no problem hugging you in public. He just doesn't do it because everyone who cares about him (especially Sebek) says that, in his position, it's better to keep these romantic gestures private. A way to prevent annoying gossip.
He doesn't initiate hugs, but he absolutely loves it when you ask him for them (And they are always the best solution for when he has his "tantrums") Your wish is his command. He's just sorry that he can't hug you with the same strength that he loves you. But with each passing day it seems that he gets better and better at measuring his strength for you.
He loves to hug you in anyway. Even if he has to use his magic to levitate you if you are both standing, due to the great difference in heights. But comfort hugs are special, and whenever you ask for them, he immediately stops whatever he might be doing and sits on a couch so you can sit on his lap and lay your head on his chest or shoulder.
Whatever you ask he will do. “What do you need to feel better? Would you like me to create a fireworks show? Make flowers grow and drawing your image in a garden? Order my attendants to create a show to entertain us, and a banquet? ... What? You just want my company?” he will laugh with joy, not only because you ask little of him, but because you simply want him.
All his attention will be on you. He will talk to you, suggest that you have tea together, and kiss your forehead and cheek from time to time.
If you happen to be so depressed to the point of crying, he will look at you on maximum alert! “What is wrong, my love? Did I make a mistake? Am I hurting you in some way?” He will loosen the hug out of fear that he might be hugging you too tightly without realizing it.
After you reassuring him by telling that it's not his fault that you're crying and that he's doing everything right, his questions will change to: “In that case... is it someone else's fault you're crying?” You will hear thunderstorms forming outside. “You can tell me the name. I will make sure they never disturb you again.” You will have to calm him down again and explain that it is no one's fault.
Only then will he relax a little, hug you again with care and affection and let you cry on his shoulder, while stroking your head. “And he will tell you that IF one day someone hurts you, no matter how small the damage may be, you can tell him, okay?”
"Or you can simply mention how close you are to Malleus Draconia and they will run away screaming for forgiveness and mercy." Lilia will say another time.
Malleus won't let go of you until he's completely and absolutely sure that you're okay again. Or not, the truth is that he likes having you like this in his arms. (Just five more minutes~)
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Silver is not the type to initiate hugs because he's to oblivious for that. But he always hugs you when you ask, regardless of the reason. You may not even have a reason, you want a hug so it's a hug he delivers.
And he's also not the type to change his behavior towards you depending on whether you're in public or not. He gives you all the hugs you want anyway.
Normally what happens is that you'll ask him for a hug, he'll say "Sure, but is there a reason?" and if you answer that there is none in particular, he will simply smile (that rare smile that only those closest to him know exists) and accept your answer, opening his arms so you can hug him.
If you say you want a hug because you're feeling sad, he'll continue with his natural poker face, but anyone who knows him will know that he's worried, but calm so as not to worry you.
He will hug you any way you want. If you want the two of you to sit down so you can sit on his lap, he will do it. He might even pick you up to do it, and if you ask him why he's taking you to a bench or couch like that, he'll say something like, "Oh, I thought you wanted to sit down because you were feeling tired. Sorry." If you say it's no problem, he'll smile and continue carrying you in his arms until you both sit down.
He'll just hug you like he normally does. Despite his strong arms, he hugs you with care and affection. Having you like this in his arms puts him at ease, to the point of... zzz... where he fell asleep, with his arms without letting go of you.
But if you start crying on his shoulder, he'll sense it! He will wake up faster than any alarm could wake him up. And when he sees you crying, he will immediately ask what happened, and apologize for sleeping when you needed him.
Even if your answer is that you don't know, that will be enough for him. He will hug you again in a surprisingly sweet and delicate way, and somehow, he won't go back to sleep until you feel better. He is now on guard!
In the same way that he only hugs you when you ask, he only lets go of you when you tell him to let you go. If you tell him he "can" stop hugging you, he won't do it until you are absolutely sure that that is what you want.
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If Sebek is dating you it's because he adores you as much as he adores Malleus and Lilia. In a different way of course, but if he got to the point of becoming your boyfriend it's because he went through the phase of seeing you as an "inferior human" and somehow you turned a switch in his head that made him start to adore you.
There are times when he still treats you the way he did before, but when you need him, like when you're sad and need a hug, he becomes your servant (practically).
He will treat you like royalty in much the same way he treats Malleus. The difference is that he sees you as someone "weaker" who is incapable of changing the fact that you need his protection and so he ends up being more caring.
He doesn't initiate hugs even if he wants to. First he will flatter you until you want a hug from him, even if it is just to thank you for your compliments. Basically, he only hugs you after you give him your consent.
Just as he has no shame in showing the respect and adoration he has for Malleus and Lilia, he also has no problem showing affection for you in public if you so desire. But there are still certain things he prefers to do when it's just the two of you, like these comforting hugs. He also lets you sit on his lap if you want, but it will take him a long time to get used to it.
Since he has always dedicated himself to his training as a soldier and guard, he is not very good at hugging. You will always feel that he is a little tense due to his lack of experience and you will have to be the one to relax him if you want better hugs.
Even if you suggest that he read a book while you're hugging on the couch, he'll decline it. If you're so sad that you, don't want, but need a hug, it's because you need him, and if you need him, he'll automatically enter his guard mode, which means all his attention will be on you.
If you happen to be so depressed to the point of crying, what was once the closest thing to a relaxed hug becomes tense again, and he will panic in his own way, controlling himself so as not to accidentally raise his voice. “What happened?! Is there something wrong?! Did I do something wrong!?” You'll have to calm him before he can calm you... or at least try.
If you say that you don't know why you're crying or don't have a specific reason, he'll sigh in frustration and say: “You can't just start crying out of nowhere! I mean... you can, but... I wasn't trained for this. I don't know what to do.” You explain to him that you don't need anything special, just him, but this may take longer than a simple explanation.
He will guard you in his arms until you are both absolutely sure that you are feeling better.
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Of course Lilia already hugs you in public on a daily basis, out of nowhere, and often he is the one initiating the hugs, knowing of course that you also want to receive them.
And of course he knows very well how to give comforting hugs. After all, he’s a loving single father.
Many times you don't even need to ask, he will simply look at your face or posture and offer it. “Aw~ You are not using your usual smile. Are you feeling well?” and even if you barely answer he will understand “No? Does my little thorny flower need a hug~?”
But if you're the one asking for the hug, his eyes will widen in surprise and then he'll break into a huge smile. “Awwww~ But of course I'll give you all the hugs you want! Khe he he. You really can surpass me in cuteness sometimes. How could I say no to you~?”
Even though he likes to give you hugs in public, he knows that these types of hugs are better in private, so you feel more comfortable too.
He gives one of the best if not the best hugs. They are firmly affectionate. At the same time that you feel his arms comfortably wrapping around you with a light loving grip, you also feel that they are strong enough to protect you from anything.
He's more of a hugger than a kisser. At most, he can give you light kisses on the cheek from time to time.
If you happen to be so depressed to the point of crying, he won't panic at all. He will simply and calmly look at you, tilt your head up by placing his fingers on your chin and ask: “Aw~ What's wrong, my thorny flower?” as he wipes away one of your tears with his thumb. “Is this moment too cute to handle? Khe he.”
Regardless of your answer, he will say with a reassuring smile: “It's okay. You can cry on my shoulder all you need. As long as I can glimpse your wonderful smile again.”
After you feel better, he will suggest cooking one of your favorite dishes or desserts to make you feel better. SAVE YOURSELF!
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*Don't look at me like that. We all know Rook is weird. I'm just trying to be true to the character.
If you would like to read more from me, you can find it in my pinned post: INDEX
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rosyblooom · 4 months
Note
could you please do lando and a stem girl who goes to uni but has a private life please
they don't know about us | ln4 smau
pairing: lando norris x private fem computer science major!reader a/n: this took me forever but hope u still like :) also, if you've got requests could u add if you want it to be smau or fic pls <3
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landonorris posted to his story!
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[ caption: Mind you, I just woke up... ]
[ tagged: yourusername ]
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landonorris posted to his story!
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[ caption 1: 🕒✈️ ] [ caption 2: miami 👋 ]
[ tagged: yourusername ]
yourusername posted to her story!
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[ caption 1: shoutout to the inventor of coffee i owe u big time🙏 ] [ caption 2: uhm i was just going to rest my eyes for 2 minutes?? good morning i guess💀 ]
f1gossip
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liked by username, username, username and 12,057 others
f1gossip Y/N L/N, current girlfriend of Lando Norris, has been photographed arriving at the paddock for today's Miami GP.
Y/N's presence comes as a bit of a surprise, considering she was absent during practice and qualifying sessions, and rarely attends races. Speculation about a potential breakup has been rampant, but her appearance suggests that there might not be trouble in paradise after all... 👀
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username she always looks so classy and put-together, i'm obsessed <33
username no bc am i the only who has no problem with her only attending a few races a year? some ppl don't have time to jet off across the globe 24/7 like
username it's the fact that they literally travelled to miami together and she still didn't go to quali or practice😐 the other wags do it, why can't she?
username i just know lando had to beg her to come smh
username why are y'all so rude omg?? some ppl are introverts...
username when you're in the public eye, you don't get to be "introverted"🙃 username that's an insane take wtf?
username GUYS i think she's a uni student cause peep lando's story a few days ago🧐 that explains why she's never at gps
username so? i'm a senior and i went to the aus gp this year username okay... do you want a cookie ?
username if a wag is at all races she's fame-hungry, and if she doesn't she's unsupportive like make up y'all's minds pls 🙄
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yourusername posted to her story!
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[ caption: YOU DID IT!!! HE DID IT!!! MY BABY IS AN F1 WINNER OMFGGG🥹🥳👏 you deserved this so so much, i'm sooo proud of you ❤️❤️❤️ ]
[ tagged: landonorris ]
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landonorris
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liked by yourusername, _aarava, martingarrix and 2,005,872 others
landonorris Memories for life ❤️
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username aw the 5th pic🥹
username do you think number six is y/n??👀 username 100%
username 🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡
username LANDO NOW WINS IKTRRRRR‼️🤩
username ofc y/n couldn't even be bothered to comment... and the most unsupportive wag award goes to y/n l/n!! congrats hun x
username y'all are weird YOU DON'T KNOW THESE PPL!! username it's the 'be kind' in ur bio for me miss gurl 🤡
username best day ever 🤧
lewishamilton 👏👏👏
(liked by author)
riabish sooo happy!!!
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username not ria being more of a gf then y/n oop username thanks for being such a good friend to lando, we love you💖
username next goal: beome world champion 👀👀
username yessirrrr
yourusername posted to her story!
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[ caption 1: back to reality 💔 ] [ caption 2: jkjk it's not that bad, i don't cry nearly as much as i did in first year 🙂‍↕️☝️ ]
[ tagged: yourbestfriend, yourfriend + more ]
harvard
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harvard Final projects, theses, dissertations, and more! Check out what these soon-to-be graduates explored in some of their last assignements on campus.
Y/N's thesis navigated the intricate relationship between privacy and secure multi-party computation, enhancing data analysis while safeguarding sensitive information.
2. Steve's environmental science project examined urban development's impact on local biodiversity, providing insights for sustainable urban planning.
3. Nya's dentistry research poster explored new methods to improve dental implant success, promising better patient outcomes and oral healthcare.
We are celebrating the extraordinary members of the Class of #Harvard24 🎓
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username 👏👏👏
username Awesome!
username Very good! Congrats to all these students!!💪
username wait am i tripping or is this y/n as in lando's gf y/n???😳 btw my biggest dream is to go to harvard in '26 !!!! 💕
username 😍😍
username streets are saying y/n goes to harvard so i had to come check and omg??😩
username no bc wag AND harvard girly?? just looked at myself and sighed fr... username now i feel bad for talking shit🫤
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[ caption 1: pulling an all-nighterrrr 😁 ] [ caption 2: nevermind, lando just made me promise to get some sleep :( ]
A few months later...
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[ caption 1: couldn't ask for better shoulders to cry on srsly 🙂‍↕️ WE DID IT MY LOVESSS 🎓❤️❤️ ] [ caption 2: this us? 😏 (corny, i know...) ]
[ tagged: yourbestfriend, yourfriend + more ]
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tagged: yourusername
lando.jpg 🍾🎓❤️
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username a win for women iktr 😌
username wow i'm so happy for her omg 🫶🫶 (jealous too but mostly happy loolol)
username LMAO are we the same person?
carlossainz55 👏👏👏
username now she has no excuse anymore
username if lando's completely happy with it all, why the hell are u upset? 🤡
username 2024 really gave us lando's first ever win and now this?? we love to see it 😍
yourusername ❤️❤️
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username we love you y/n <333 username i hope you'll be able to attend more races from now on!! i love seeing you in the paddock 💕
username the way i still haven't fully processed the fact that harvard gave her a shoutout goddamn🤯
usernmae not you calling that a shoutout bye💀💀
username AAHHHH YAYY CONGRATS Y/N YOU'RE DOING AMAZING SWEETIE 🤍🤍🤍🤍
0:33 ───ㅇ───────── 2:40
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daisynik7 · 1 year
Text
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Pairing: Takuma Ino x f!reader
Rating: Explicit – MINORS DO NOT INTERACT
Word Count: ~1.7k
cw: explicit language, mentions of a popular horror movie, smut – PIV sex (cowgirl position), nipple play, blow job, mask kink, slight degradation (slut, whore), use of pet names (cutie, sweetie, baby) 
Summary: You and your new boyfriend Ino decide to watch a horror movie together in honor of spooky season. Halfway through, he notices how skittish you are, making him want to play a silly prank on you with his signature ski mask. It’s all fun and games until he realizes that you actually like seeing him in this way more than he anticipated. 
Author’s Note: Happy October y'all! What can I say, I am VERY into Takuma Ino right now and I just had to get this out of my system. This is barely edited or proofread, sorry for any grammar mistakes or typos, I really was just letting my fingers fly through this in a moment of passion LOL. Likes, reblogs, and/or comments are always appreciated, thank you for reading! MDNI banner by @/cafekitsune. 
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You turn off all the lights, the only source of illumination coming from the TV screen, paused at the very start of the movie you decided to watch tonight. With a big bowl of freshly popped kernels in your grasp, you huddle beside your boyfriend, Ino, on the couch, covering both your legs with a fleece blanket. He wraps his arm around you, pulling you in closer, reaching to grab a handful of popcorn to stuff inside his mouth. “Ready?” he muffles, pointing the remote to the screen, finger pressed to the center button. 
Nuzzling your head against him, you answer. “Yup!”
It’s apparently one of those cult classic horror flicks according to Ino, who recommended it when you mentioned how you wanted to watch something scary for October. He’s seen it before, many times in fact, but he insists that you watch it. He has no clue how frightened you get over the silliest things, so tonight will be a treat for the both of you. 
The opening scene plays out: a beautiful blonde picks up the phone and the conversation ends quickly short because it’s the wrong number. Normal so far, good. It rings again, but now the caller seems interested in talking. Do you like scary movies? Do you have a boyfriend? The man’s voice gives you the creeps, and you find yourself shuddering from it, cuddling closer to Ino, who glances at you with a smirk on his face. 
You never told me your name.
Why do you want to know my name?
Because I want to know who I’m looking at.
This line gives you goosebumps and you lift the blankets up to hide behind it. “Ew, creepy!” Ino only laughs, throwing a few more pieces of popcorn into his mouth. 
It escalates from here, getting increasingly chaotic and violent. By the time you’re halfway into the film, the bowl is down to its last kernels and you’re crouched in Ino’s lap, peeking through your fingers. He pauses the movie after one particularly brutal kill. “Snack break! I’m going to make some more popcorn and go pee.”
“You’re leaving?!” you whine, clinging on to him as he tries to get up.
He chuckles. “Babe! It’s just a movie. I’ll be right back, okay?” He kisses you on the forehead, heading into the kitchen, leaving you alone in the living room. 
Of course it’s just a movie, but you can’t help feeling creeped out in the dark like this. You reach for one of the nightstands, turning on the lamp. You hear the drone of the microwave, and after a minute or so, the distinct sound of popping. Eventually, it comes to a stop, and the entire house is eerily quiet. You’re tempted to call out for Ino, wondering where he is, but you remember that he had to use the bathroom. 
Suddenly, a shadowy figure appears right behind on you on the couch, grabbing your shoulders and shouting gibberish at you. You scream bloody murder, ready to punch him and run away when Ino lifts his ski mask up to reveal himself, tears streaming down his face, cracking up at you. 
“Ino!” you yell at him, slapping his hands away from you. “You fucking asshole!”
He doubles over, cackling, wiping his eyes. It takes a good while for him to regain his composure as you glare at him, arms crossed over your chest. “I’m sorry, baby. I just couldn’t resist.” He sits beside you, stretching his arms out for a hug. “You have to admit, that was fucking hilarious.”
You shake your head, refusing. “You’re such a dick.”
“Oh, come on! It was just a little prank. Now you’ll be way more prepared for the rest of the movie!” He pulls the mask over his face again, everything covered except the holes for his eyes. “See? Not so scary anymore, right?”
You inspect him carefully, still pouting, not saying a word.
“I’m sorry, sweetie. Truly. I promise not to scare you again.” He scoots towards you, nudging you in the arm. 
You roll your eyes at him, relaxing. “Fine.”
“Can I get a kiss now?” 
He tries to lift his mask up, but you stop him, pulling it back down. “I don’t want to see your face right now. I’m still annoyed, you know.”
“Aw man! Really?”
You hoist it just past his nose, leaning in to give him a soft kiss on the lips. When you break apart, he smirks at you. “You like this, don’t you? Seeing me with my mask on.”
You shrug, a sly grin on your face, neither confirming nor denying his accusation. Sure, you were a bit upset at first, when he scared the shit out of you. But seeing his face covered like that may have sparked a desire in you that you never knew you had, until now. 
“Oh my god! You do, you do!” he exclaims, shaking your arm. “My cutie has a mask kink!”
“Shut up, asshole!” you yell at him, pretending to shove him off, smiling. 
“You’re a fucking freak!” he giggles, pouncing on you. He starts tickling you along your ribcage, causing you to squirm beneath him as he straddles you, trapping you between his legs. His fingers flutter under your arms, stroking your sensitive skin.
“Ino!” you cry out, laughing from the sensation. 
You can feel his cock growing hard in his pants, balls heavy on your stomach. Suddenly, he stops, mask still folded to expose his lips, leaning down to kiss you sloppily. He pins your hands above your head, locking his fingers with yours. He slips inside your mouth, grazing your tongue with his, hungry for your saliva. “Fuck,” he moans into you, nipping at your bottom lip. “You like this freaky shit, don’t you? Nasty slut.” His playful tone is laden with lust now, low and sultry, mouth brushing along your neck, sucking at your pulse points to mark you. 
You whine his name, wrapping your legs around his waist, grinding yourself against him. 
“Look at you, getting so fucking dumb all because of my mask,” he purrs. “What else turns you on, cutie? Tell me.”
Without thinking, you blurt out, “Spit. Your spit. I want it.”
“Oh shit,” he swears, licking his mouth. He traces the outline of your lips, beckoning you to open up, dribbling a thick wad of saliva inside you. You gulp it down, sticking your tongue out for more. 
“Oh fuck, you’re nasty,” he says, doing it again. “Makes me so fucking horny seeing you like this. Seeing my cutie act like a fucking whore.” He slips beneath your shirt, fondling your bare breasts, flicking your peaked nipples with his thumbs. 
“Fuck, Ino,” you whisper, pussy throbbing in your panties, arousal leaking through the fabric. 
“You like it when I play with your tits, huh?” Like it when I pinch them hard like this.” He squeezes them between his thumb and index finger, enough pressure to stimulate you, making you moan his name again and again.
He swears under his breath, shoving his pants down his legs, shimmying out of them until he’s only in his underwear now, erection stiff in his boxers. “You gonna suck my cock now or what, slut?” 
You nod, kneeling in front of him, knees on the carpet, spreading his thighs apart. He lifts his ass off the couch to slide out of his boxers, letting them fall around his ankles. You kiss the tip of his dick, smearing his precum around your lips like gloss before swallowing him into your mouth. 
He lets out a drawn out, “Fuck,” watching you with wide eyes as you bob up and down his shaft. Voice shaky, he asks, “Can I put my hands on you?”
Something about him in this ski mask makes you want to be submissive, makes you want to be used. You grab both his hands, guiding them towards the sides of your head, giving him free rein to manhandle you.
“Holy shit,” he murmurs, gripping you tighter, gradually thrusting his hips in tandem with you. His cockhead hits the back of your throat, teasing your gag reflex, but you resist, tears collecting in the corners of your eyes, enduring it. 
Noticing you, he pulls out, a string of spit between you. “Baby, baby. Please don’t force yourself. I don’t want to hurt you.” He reaches to his side, grabbing a tissue from the table beside the couch, wiping away the spit around your mouth and the tears in your eyes. “Come here, cutie. I want to make you feel good too.”
You strip out of your bottoms, straddling his lap, pussy wet and aching against him. He moans as you rock back and forth on his shaft, pressing his thumb to your clit, massaging it. “There we go. Now we both can feel good, yeah?”
After a few more strokes, you beg him to fuck you, lifting up to guide his cock inside you slowly, sinking down on him until he bottoms out. You bounce on him, his hands gripped to your waist, guiding you, moaning your name between expletives. 
As you approach your orgasm, you pull up his mask, placing it on his head as he usually wears it. He smiles brightly at you, nuzzling his nose to yours. “There’s my pretty girl. Can you come for me now? Come all over this cock?”
You kiss him passionately, arms wrapped around his neck as he thrusts into you, hands squeezed on your ass now. You reach your climax, moaning into his mouth. He comes with you, shooting his load deep into your womb, filling you up with his cream pie. The two of you continue to kiss slowly, catching your breaths. He caresses your back while you melt into his embrace. 
“We need to establish a safe word,” he suggests, cradling you in his arms. “I want to make sure I’m not hurting you.”
You hum into his skin, saying the first thing that comes to mind. “Popcorn."
He chuckles, stroking the back of your neck gently. “Alright. Popcorn it is.” A beat later, he exclaims, “Popcorn! I totally forgot about the popcorn!”
You laugh, giving your boyfriend a wet smooch on the cheek.
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Text
Even if you think AI search could be good, it won’t be good
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TONIGHT (May 15), I'm in NORTH HOLLYWOOD for a screening of STEPHANIE KELTON'S FINDING THE MONEY; FRIDAY (May 17), I'm at the INTERNET ARCHIVE in SAN FRANCISCO to keynote the 10th anniversary of the AUTHORS ALLIANCE.
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The big news in search this week is that Google is continuing its transition to "AI search" – instead of typing in search terms and getting links to websites, you'll ask Google a question and an AI will compose an answer based on things it finds on the web:
https://blog.google/products/search/generative-ai-google-search-may-2024/
Google bills this as "let Google do the googling for you." Rather than searching the web yourself, you'll delegate this task to Google. Hidden in this pitch is a tacit admission that Google is no longer a convenient or reliable way to retrieve information, drowning as it is in AI-generated spam, poorly labeled ads, and SEO garbage:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/05/03/keyword-swarming/#site-reputation-abuse
Googling used to be easy: type in a query, get back a screen of highly relevant results. Today, clicking the top links will take you to sites that paid for placement at the top of the screen (rather than the sites that best match your query). Clicking further down will get you scams, AI slop, or bulk-produced SEO nonsense.
AI-powered search promises to fix this, not by making Google search results better, but by having a bot sort through the search results and discard the nonsense that Google will continue to serve up, and summarize the high quality results.
Now, there are plenty of obvious objections to this plan. For starters, why wouldn't Google just make its search results better? Rather than building a LLM for the sole purpose of sorting through the garbage Google is either paid or tricked into serving up, why not just stop serving up garbage? We know that's possible, because other search engines serve really good results by paying for access to Google's back-end and then filtering the results:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/04/04/teach-me-how-to-shruggie/#kagi
Another obvious objection: why would anyone write the web if the only purpose for doing so is to feed a bot that will summarize what you've written without sending anyone to your webpage? Whether you're a commercial publisher hoping to make money from advertising or subscriptions, or – like me – an open access publisher hoping to change people's minds, why would you invite Google to summarize your work without ever showing it to internet users? Nevermind how unfair that is, think about how implausible it is: if this is the way Google will work in the future, why wouldn't every publisher just block Google's crawler?
A third obvious objection: AI is bad. Not morally bad (though maybe morally bad, too!), but technically bad. It "hallucinates" nonsense answers, including dangerous nonsense. It's a supremely confident liar that can get you killed:
https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2023/sep/01/mushroom-pickers-urged-to-avoid-foraging-books-on-amazon-that-appear-to-be-written-by-ai
The promises of AI are grossly oversold, including the promises Google makes, like its claim that its AI had discovered millions of useful new materials. In reality, the number of useful new materials Deepmind had discovered was zero:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/04/23/maximal-plausibility/#reverse-centaurs
This is true of all of AI's most impressive demos. Often, "AI" turns out to be low-waged human workers in a distant call-center pretending to be robots:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/01/31/neural-interface-beta-tester/#tailfins
Sometimes, the AI robot dancing on stage turns out to literally be just a person in a robot suit pretending to be a robot:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/01/29/pay-no-attention/#to-the-little-man-behind-the-curtain
The AI video demos that represent "an existential threat to Hollywood filmmaking" turn out to be so cumbersome as to be practically useless (and vastly inferior to existing production techniques):
https://www.wheresyoured.at/expectations-versus-reality/
But let's take Google at its word. Let's stipulate that:
a) It can't fix search, only add a slop-filtering AI layer on top of it; and
b) The rest of the world will continue to let Google index its pages even if they derive no benefit from doing so; and
c) Google will shortly fix its AI, and all the lies about AI capabilities will be revealed to be premature truths that are finally realized.
AI search is still a bad idea. Because beyond all the obvious reasons that AI search is a terrible idea, there's a subtle – and incurable – defect in this plan: AI search – even excellent AI search – makes it far too easy for Google to cheat us, and Google can't stop cheating us.
Remember: enshittification isn't the result of worse people running tech companies today than in the years when tech services were good and useful. Rather, enshittification is rooted in the collapse of constraints that used to prevent those same people from making their services worse in service to increasing their profit margins:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/03/26/glitchbread/#electronic-shelf-tags
These companies always had the capacity to siphon value away from business customers (like publishers) and end-users (like searchers). That comes with the territory: digital businesses can alter their "business logic" from instant to instant, and for each user, allowing them to change payouts, prices and ranking. I call this "twiddling": turning the knobs on the system's back-end to make sure the house always wins:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/02/19/twiddler/
What changed wasn't the character of the leaders of these businesses, nor their capacity to cheat us. What changed was the consequences for cheating. When the tech companies merged to monopoly, they ceased to fear losing your business to a competitor.
Google's 90% search market share was attained by bribing everyone who operates a service or platform where you might encounter a search box to connect that box to Google. Spending tens of billions of dollars every year to make sure no one ever encounters a non-Google search is a cheaper way to retain your business than making sure Google is the very best search engine:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/02/21/im-feeling-unlucky/#not-up-to-the-task
Competition was once a threat to Google; for years, its mantra was "competition is a click away." Today, competition is all but nonexistent.
Then the surveillance business consolidated into a small number of firms. Two companies dominate the commercial surveillance industry: Google and Meta, and they collude to rig the market:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jedi_Blue
That consolidation inevitably leads to regulatory capture: shorn of competitive pressure, the companies that dominate the sector can converge on a single message to policymakers and use their monopoly profits to turn that message into policy:
https://pluralistic.net/2022/06/05/regulatory-capture/
This is why Google doesn't have to worry about privacy laws. They've successfully prevented the passage of a US federal consumer privacy law. The last time the US passed a federal consumer privacy law was in 1988. It's a law that bans video store clerks from telling the newspapers which VHS cassettes you rented:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Video_Privacy_Protection_Act
In Europe, Google's vast profits lets it fly an Irish flag of convenience, thus taking advantage of Ireland's tolerance for tax evasion and violations of European privacy law:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/05/15/finnegans-snooze/#dirty-old-town
Google doesn't fear competition, it doesn't fear regulation, and it also doesn't fear rival technologies. Google and its fellow Big Tech cartel members have expanded IP law to allow it to prevent third parties from reverse-engineer, hacking, or scraping its services. Google doesn't have to worry about ad-blocking, tracker blocking, or scrapers that filter out Google's lucrative, low-quality results:
https://locusmag.com/2020/09/cory-doctorow-ip/
Google doesn't fear competition, it doesn't fear regulation, it doesn't fear rival technology and it doesn't fear its workers. Google's workforce once enjoyed enormous sway over the company's direction, thanks to their scarcity and market power. But Google has outgrown its dependence on its workers, and lays them off in vast numbers, even as it increases its profits and pisses away tens of billions on stock buybacks:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/11/25/moral-injury/#enshittification
Google is fearless. It doesn't fear losing your business, or being punished by regulators, or being mired in guerrilla warfare with rival engineers. It certainly doesn't fear its workers.
Making search worse is good for Google. Reducing search quality increases the number of queries, and thus ads, that each user must make to find their answers:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/04/24/naming-names/#prabhakar-raghavan
If Google can make things worse for searchers without losing their business, it can make more money for itself. Without the discipline of markets, regulators, tech or workers, it has no impediment to transferring value from searchers and publishers to itself.
Which brings me back to AI search. When Google substitutes its own summaries for links to pages, it creates innumerable opportunities to charge publishers for preferential placement in those summaries.
This is true of any algorithmic feed: while such feeds are important – even vital – for making sense of huge amounts of information, they can also be used to play a high-speed shell-game that makes suckers out of the rest of us:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/05/11/for-you/#the-algorithm-tm
When you trust someone to summarize the truth for you, you become terribly vulnerable to their self-serving lies. In an ideal world, these intermediaries would be "fiduciaries," with a solemn (and legally binding) duty to put your interests ahead of their own:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/05/07/treacherous-computing/#rewilding-the-internet
But Google is clear that its first duty is to its shareholders: not to publishers, not to searchers, not to "partners" or employees.
AI search makes cheating so easy, and Google cheats so much. Indeed, the defects in AI give Google a readymade excuse for any apparent self-dealing: "we didn't tell you a lie because someone paid us to (for example, to recommend a product, or a hotel room, or a political point of view). Sure, they did pay us, but that was just an AI 'hallucination.'"
The existence of well-known AI hallucinations creates a zone of plausible deniability for even more enshittification of Google search. As Madeleine Clare Elish writes, AI serves as a "moral crumple zone":
https://estsjournal.org/index.php/ests/article/view/260
That's why, even if you're willing to believe that Google could make a great AI-based search, we can nevertheless be certain that they won't.
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If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/05/15/they-trust-me-dumb-fucks/#ai-search
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sehodreams · 6 months
Text
fanta grape
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TW and tags: threesome (late poly?), cheating, dubious consent (from smoking and drinking), toxic!Seunghan.
WC: 6.8K (okay we getting better at making shorter stuff)
Summary: Seunghan doesn’t need a clingy girlfriend, but Anton and Wonbin do.
Comment: I did say that pretty boys with fried hair were my weakness. I think the images make this look darker than what it really is, sorry if you expect something heavy dark, this is not it (except for Seunghan’s toxic behaviour).
7:30 PM was too early to give up.
You shifted in your seat, trying to concentrate on another thing that wasn’t the hour, how the light of the TV was slightly blinding you in the dark room, and how the skin under your thighs was sweating.
Half an hour before you had told yourself that nothing would make you leave without having a proper conversation with your boyfriend, but he not being there hadn’t crossed your mind, and you were just so relieved that his friends hadn’t asked you to leave, that the possibility of Seunghan not coming back with the knowledge of you being there just started to settle in.
Anton was already choosing a movie from the big carton box in Wonbin’s living room when you arrived, and Wonbin was picking a few beers when he saw you from his window, grabbing a fanta grape for you, perfectly knowing why you were standing there on his doorstep at 7PM.
Looking at the movie, between your boyfriend’s friends on each side, you tried to remind yourself why you were there.
Seunghan had dated you for almost half a year, he’s been your first everything, your first date, your first confession, your first boyfriend and your first orgasm, and everything was good, so you didn’t get why the sudden change with him.
Well, not everything was good, but didn’t all couples have problems? Why would he act so differently after some discussions and a few refusals?
It’s been days since the last time he answered one of your calls, and his messages were getting shorter and shorter, leaving you on read for hours and only answering when he knew you were asleep.
Sorry, been busy.
What kind of excuse was that?
You decided to have a talk with him to fix things, perhaps you weren’t paying enough attention to other signals, or perhaps he was getting tired of you not being able to go to his gigs and wait for him when he practised, but he knew how was your family when you started, so why was he suddenly pushing you to do things he perfectly knew you couldn’t?
‘’Can you call him again?’’ you asked Anton for the third time.
You didn’t dare to look him in the eyes while making that question again, but Seunghan wasn’t answering any of your calls, and you didn’t know what else to do, he had at least answered the first time Anton called him when you arrived.
You didn’t have to say anything for him to grab his phone and mark Seunghan’s number when you arrived.  ‘’She’s here’’ he had said, and he had tried to pass you the phone, but Seunghan had ended the call before you could talk.
Still, even having bothered him enough after that first call, Anton did it, he called him, and to prove he was doing it, he showed you how his name appeared on his screen, ringing a couple of times before the woman’s voice saying you could leave a message, and that you knew a bit too well by that point, started.
Seunghan was declining the calls of his friends now.
You shifted on your seat, looking down at your hands and the drops of the cold can fall over your uncovered thighs.
Feeling stupid, you bit the inside of your cheek, trying to hold back your tears to not show how much you were hurting in front of the boys.
‘’Baby, what’s wrong?’’ Wonbin asked, looking at your shoulders get smaller and you blinking the tears away.
He knew what was wrong, everyone knew.
‘’Seunghan is seeing someone else, right?’’ you asked back, hands gripping the metallic object in your hands, leaving dents on it, and making your fingertips change from the reddish lively colour they always had to a pale one.
Both stayed silent.
‘’I’m so stupid’’ you sourly laughed, drinking the rest of your fanta.
Anton stood up to grab you another one, you knew it, but shaking your head you asked for a beer instead.
‘’But you hate it’’ he replied.
‘’Anton, I’ve been abandoned, could you please give me a beer?’’ you said, hurt, and as polite as always.
‘’Try mine’’ Wonbin offered, putting his bottle in front of you and surprising you, but resting your hand over his holding the drink, you accepted that he maintained it in the air for you, moved it closer to your mouth and tilted it for you to drink it.
It tasted terrible, you didn’t understand why they all drank it like water, you didn’t see the point of getting drunk, and usually, when you went out with them, you ended up being the one taking care of your boyfriend at parties instead of the other way around, like he usually promised before he made you sneak out.
Feeling even sadder, you moved his hand higher and drank a bigger gulp of that beer with earthy flavour.
Making a face at the end, and pushing Wonbin’s hand away, you didn’t want to say out loud how bad it tasted so Anton didn’t say an I told you that reminded you of your dad every time you made a mistake, like dating Seunghan.
Anton gave you another can of your fanta grape and sat with crossed arms, focusing on the TV again to not make you conscious.
‘’Thank you’’ you said, and he nodded.
‘’Just drink what you want, we buy that stuff for you anyways’’ Anton said later.
You felt piteous, and trying to brush the awkward moment you put yourself on, when your eyes saw Wonbin’s stash on the TV stand, you interrupted them again.
‘’Why aren’t you smoking?’’ you asked purely out of curiosity.
They used to always share a joint after they finished playing the same five songs they had an entire afternoon, and the first times they had even invited you to smoke with them, or well, Seunghan did, until Wonbin told him to leave you alone if you didn’t want to.
You didn’t like to stay there for long for that reason, you wouldn’t do anything at all, yet you felt like an uninvited guest sitting and limiting them with your presence because of all the things you couldn’t do, afraid of making them hate you every time you walked there with Seunghan pulling you by the hand.
‘’I thought you hated when the smell stayed on your clothes’’ Wonbin replied, and it wasn't a guess, he had heard you telling it to Seunghan when he tried to convince you that a hit wouldn’t hurt you.
You didn’t hate it solely because of that, you hated that it was an aroma hard to mask, and your dad was not as hard on you as he was before, but you still trembled every time you arrived at your house after spending an afternoon with a high Seunghan, afraid of your dad thinking that you were the one smoking it, and the consequences you would have to face.
You hated when Seunghan tried to force you onto things he knew would put you in a lot of trouble, it was nice that he had pushed you to do certain things you wouldn’t have dared until you met him, like wearing skirts, buying makeup and going to parties, but you had explained your reasons in detail for not smoking, and he had continued insisting.
Still, you never expected them all to not smoke for something you had told your boyfriend in supposed secret.
‘’That didn’t stop you before’’ you answered, taking another sip of your soda and trying to brush off the sudden blush on your cheeks, maybe you were overthinking it, you tried to tell yourself, why would they do something like that for you when they weren’t even something yours? They were your boyfriend’s friends, and nothing else, ‘’you can smoke if you want, don’t mind me’’.
Frowning, you let the new can rest over your thighs, and feeling the intense coldness bring you back to the moment, you saw how Anton didn’t waste a single second to light a joint up, happy to finally do something with his mouth now that he had your permission.
He always preferred smoking more than drinking, so you couldn’t understand how he survived the ‘’not smoking’’ rule they had created without your knowledge, and even if you weren’t around that much lately for it to be considered a real restrain, it still surprised you.
That didn’t change the fact that you had taken care of him on a couple of occasions though. Just like holding Wonbin’s hair when he got extremely wasted and threw up in strangers' bathrooms, you had let Anton sleep with his head on your lap when he smoked and ate a bit too much while Seunghan or Sohee ran to 24/7 convenience stores for something to bring him back to life.
‘’Do you want to try it?’’ he asked you, and you, deciding to do something different for your break-up, nodded.
‘’Do you even know how to smoke?’’ Wonbin inquired, laughing beside you.
‘’I’ve seen you two doing it more than enough’’ you quickly said, sounding different from usual and making Anton laugh, because it was true, especially with him.
Passing you the stick, you observed it for a good minute between your fingers, debating in your insides if it was worthy, but then you looked to the side, at how the drums frames of your boyfriend reflected the light of the TV, and you remembered why you were there.
Taking in air, you breathed, then moved it closer to your face, and seeing the little tip, you sucked it deep and nice.
They watched you as if they were studying you, having high expectations of your confidence, and laughing loudly when you coughed.
‘’Calm down’’ Wonbin took the joint from your hand, showing you how to do it right.
His lips barely touched it, and he nicely inhaled the smoke, holding it in like a pro, closing his eyes, and then slowly letting it out. It was an honest lesson, but you felt as if he had challenged you, and letting him pass it to Anton, you waited for your turn to prove yourself again.
This time you did it better, holding it in for longer, and softly letting it out like he did, watching him look at you with that cheeky grin.
It wasn’t even 8:15 when you checked again, and you had until 10 to stay and then go home, that was your curfew and you followed it religiously to avoid problems. So, watching Rocky get beaten once again on a TV old enough to be in your grandparents’ basement, you decided to close your eyes and let the weed effects take you, with an I have enough time in mind.
You wanted to see what was that magic that made everyone love it.
Leaning on the back of the couch, after many minutes, you started to feel conscious of different things, like the electric sound of the people cheering inside the old TV, the sticky sensation of the dirty fabric of the sofa under your recently shaved legs, and even more, the boy's legs touching yours on each side.
Of course they would be manspreading, they were in an indie/rock/you don’t know what the fuck band, so the way they caged you between their bodies and made you uncomfortable to find their own comfort probably didn’t even cross their minds.
Your eyelids opened when you heard a loud slam come from the movie, startling you, and you decided to watch the ceiling above you, recognizing the little spots from the humidity you had disliked since you stepped into that garage.
Wow, you really disliked, to not say hated, many things.
Just realizing it, you noticed that you disliked that garage from the first time you arrived, you disliked the old green couch that Wonbin made your boyfriend push from three streets down to his house, you disliked the old TV with static noise that your boyfriend and his friends made you watch, and you especially disliked that your boyfriend left you aside for all those things you hated without a doubt.
Why were you even trying it? You asked yourself.
After getting stressed for so many days, you didn’t have the energy to keep blaming yourself for it, and when Rocky had his first date with Adrianna, you laughed with the boys at Rocky’s corniness when he followed her around the ice ring.
Having seen that movie more times with them than necessary, that was one of the few scenes you honestly enjoyed, concentrating on it even when your boyfriend made you mad after he dropped a bomb like ‘’sorry, forgot we had this gig later, so I won’t be able to go to our date’’.
Or perhaps you concentrated because Anton always turned up the volume when that scene came since he saw you liked it too.
Watching them walk the street, you leaned to Wonbin’s side without noticing. His leather jacket felt glue-like against your cheek, but you didn’t mind, and looking at Rocky ramble about his turtles to catch Adrianna’s attention, you laughed when you saw the ugly pink lamp above them that was identical to the lamp Wonbin had put on one of the corners there.
‘’Rocky’s apartment reminds me of here’’ Anton said, referring to Wonbin’s ugly garage.
‘’What are you saying?’’ you interrupted him, ‘’Rocky is the original, Wonbin needs more than old cabinets, leaking pipes and granny lamps to catch him.’’
Wonbin only looked at you and shook his head with a smile, not even trying to defend himself.
When you focused on the movie again instead of the sensation of Wonbin’s leg pushing yours jokingly and his hand resting on your knee like he had done many times, Rocky was cornering her in his entrance, and on any other occasion you would’ve pushed his hand away, but when you saw the ambience of the movie get heavier, you couldn’t focus on anything that wasn’t the kiss about to happen and how cold his hand that previously shared his drink with you felt against your skin.
Wonbin’s hand was trailing a bit higher, still a decent distance from anything too alarming, and you felt something forming in your insides, like a little spark that you kind of liked, so you didn’t stop him.
When Rocky kissed her, you squeezed your legs, trapping Wonbin’s hand between your legs, dangerously high and near your panties.
The kiss was quick but deep, and you felt Wonbin’s hand fitting perfectly between your legs, long fingers and a wide palm, feeling good and making you clench around nothing.
You woke up, you were getting wet with the hand of your boyfriend’s friend between your thighs, and opening them to let it free, you shifted on your place, pulling down your skirt as much as you could.
‘’Everything okay?’’ you heard Anton asking after you had pushed his leg with yours when you freed Wonbin’s hand.
Looking at him with lost eyes, you nodded, trying to brush off what had just happened.
Concentrating on the screen again, you leaned against Anton this time, almost a bit too much, trying to put a little distance between Wonbin and you so his hand didn’t get lost again.
Anton directed his eyes at you when he felt you pressing your chest against his arm, and again, you didn’t mean to, it just felt comfortable to be against him, and you couldn’t think twice about what you were doing when you pressed your chest again.
Liar.
You lied to yourself once again, like when you told yourself Seunghan didn’t mean to make you cry with his jokes, or when he lied saying he wasn’t high so you let him sneak into your room in the middle of the night, or when he tried to make you eat an edible that Anton snatched from your hand before you could taste it.
Suddenly, with that memory, Anton protecting you from a danger you didn’t know, you wanted to get closer to him, and for the first time that night, you felt happy to have chosen such a skimpy outfit that did nothing to shield you from the freezing night.
You just put on what Seunghan liked, what usually caught his attention, because that was your goal, not to survive the air of the winter night, and the big sweater that you tossed to one of Wonbin’s bushes hadn’t helped you avoid your neighbours’ stares, but at least it fooled your mother enough when you left before your father came from work.
Trying to remember the name of the last five presidents to keep you sane (which soon became the name of the last five songs you heard while walking there), you saw the way Wonbin was paying more attention to you on his side than the TV in front of you two, and not being able to pull your eyes away from him and his messy ashy blonde hair, probably as dirty as his garage, still hugging Anton’s arm, your smile got bigger when he moved a string of your hair behind your ear.
"You're high" he affirmed, and you, not confirming it, only closed your eyes to the sensation of his fingertips grazing a little spot behind your ear.
Shit, you murmured inside your mind.
You were getting too wet for your own good, and that wouldn't have been a problem if you were with your boyfriend, he would've immediately noticed the change in your demeanour and would've taken you to the bathroom to give you a quick fuck (not making you cum), helping you endure the need until he could walk you home and waited for your sign so he could climb the tree near your window.
But he wasn't there, and you didn't know what to do to make your cunt stop pulsating around nothing.
Gulping, you moved your eyes to Anton.
Everything you were feeling had to be because of that stupid joint, and he’d know what to do, like he always does.
"Should we take her home?" He asked, noticing the way you were uncomfortable with both pairs of eyes over you, hiding your face on his side out of embarrassment.
"Hell no, her dad is going to shoot us" Wonbin quickly answered.
You laughed at that, the little giggle making them smile too, amused with your sudden happiness, an image of you they weren’t used to, but it was true, your dad would shoot at them if they left his princess with wobbly legs in his doorstep, and he would kill you later too, which was actually kind of upsetting, and probably the reason why you always thought everything twice, my dad is going to kill me if he finds out, so no one should’ve laughed, but you all did.
Still, your imagination made you squeeze your thighs, making you see another way in which they would leave you with said wobbly legs, and feeling a bit of relief from the pressure that was building in your abdomen, you shamelessly repeated the action.
‘’Look at this girl, what do you think you’re doing?’’ Wonbin asked with a grin.
You should’ve stopped, you should’ve listened to that part in your mind that told you that you were acting like a fucking slut and to go home, but you didn’t, and with an exhale, you lied on your back as far as you could, and looking at them, you waited for one of them to do something.
Your exposed skin started to prickle, and a stronger tingle installed between your legs when Wonbin’s hand posed over your knee again.
Even if they didn’t do anything intense, when Anton’s hand gripped your other knee, a mewl left your mouth, calling for them to do something else than just touching that part of you.
‘’Fuck, what should we do?’’ Anton asked, without a grin, licking his lips and a frown on his forehead, ready to eat his meal.
‘’Shit do I know, I just want to touch her’’ Wonbin said.
Anton was relying on the older to say something, and you kind of did too. If he sent you home, you doubted you could continue with your little show, or show your face to them ever again, and you would end up unsatisfied, but at least you would keep a bit of your pride that Seunghan had smashed.
‘’Her nipples are so hard’’ the younger commented, eyes fixed on your perky buds standing under your white top that did nothing to hide them.
They could easily see the outline of them under the thick fabric, making their mouths dry for a taste.
‘’If you open your legs for us, we’ll touch you, but only if you do, we won’t do anything unless you show us what you want’’ Wonbin declared.
Your escape, that was your opportunity to leave, you could stay with your legs closed, or you could stand and walk out, you were high, but not that high, and you had no reason to depend on any of them to go home.
Watching the movie, you inhaled as much air as you could.
You look pretty tonight, you know? with an unclear mind, you heard the dialogue, Rocky saying it to his girl before his fight.
That was your fight now.
‘’How do I look tonight?’’ you let the question out.
You had dressed for Seunghan, an outfit you wouldn’t have worn in your wildest dreams before and that made you feel like a clown walking around, a foreigner on your own skin.
That wasn’t you, and when the boys saw you, they watched you from head to toe before they announced that Seunghan had just left, which felt kind of nice too.
‘’What do you expect me to say? You look gorgeous, but I have to admit it bothers me that you didn’t dress like that to see me’’ Wonbin smiled.
‘’You have no idea how much I love how you look in this skirt, but it makes me crazy to think you had to walk here alone’’ Anton didn’t smile.
You look fine was everything Seunghan would’ve said, not even looking at you.
Both answers felt correct in their way, and not having any other reason to stop yourself anymore, you were single after all, you opened your legs, and being bolder than usual, you lifted the hem of your skirt for them enough to see your underwear.
‘’Shit, my baby must’ve been hurting so much’’ Wonbin teased, pressing his fingers over your clothed cunt and drawing the form of your lips over them.
‘’She looks in so much pain’’ Anton agreed, and his hand went to your tit, pinching one of your nipples like he had been wanting since he saw you cross Wonbin’s door.
Not wearing a bra, he used his thumb and index to play with them, making your mouth fall open with a silent moan.
‘’Don’t be like that’’ your back arched to give Anton better access to your chest, so he touched you better, like you wanted to be touched, ‘’be kind, please’’.
Wonbin closed his eyes and Anton shook his head, both smiling from ear to ear.
‘’Don’t worry baby, you took care of us, now we’ll take care of you’’ Wonbin pushed your panties to the side and slid his middle finger up and down between your wet lips, ‘’She’s dripping so much, I think I can push one inside without problem’’.
‘’Has Seunghan ever made you cum with his fingers?’’ Anton asked.
You didn’t want to answer, it was so private, something between you and your boyfriend (now ex), and they could see in your flushing cheeks and your wavering eyes how you wouldn’t put Seunghan to shame even if he didn’t treat you right, and that was even more adorable for them.
‘’It’s okay princess, you don’t have to answer, tonight you’ll learn how a real orgasm feels like’’ Anton answered himself.
Both of them had turned to you a long time ago, and making you spread more for them, to show everything, they engraved the image of your pussy glistening and the juices that reflected the only light there.
‘’So fucking pretty’’ Wonbin cursed, licking his finger that had just touched you, ‘’as sweet as I imagined’’ he groaned, fingers going to your clit to recollect more of your wetness.
All tender and inviting, Anton’s left hand went from your chest to your pussy, fighting with Wonbin to thumb your clit, until he won, and Wonbin had to feel content with filling your entrance with one of his fingers.
9:10 PM
You looked at the hour, reminding yourself that you had to leave at ten.
‘’I’ll get punished if I don’t get home by ten…’’ you cried when Wonbin added one more finger, pushing them in and then pulling them out until just the tip of his fingers stayed inside.
Anton kept making circles over your clit, repeating Wonbin’s action and licking his fingers before going back to his job.
‘’We’ll walk you home princess, don’t worry’’ Anton secured.
‘’Fuck’’ you moaned when Wonbin increased the pace of his fingers fucking you.
His guitarist's fingers were working you so well, and you never doubted he had a talent when he played songs for you while waiting for your boyfriend to arrive, but to feel the same fingers playing with your insides confirmed his talent even more, and soon your hand went to his wrist, trying to stop him from making you cry.
‘’Too good’’ you cried, forgetting that Anton was also the culprit of that tightness forming on your core, letting his stimulations continue.
‘’I know baby, I know’’ Wonbin smiled, stopping his movements and watching the minor rolling your little bud, making you tremble and tear up, squirming to escape a pleasure you had never felt so intense before.
That didn’t last long, Wonbin couldn’t let himself be overshadowed by another boy, and with your hand still wrapping his wrist, he went back to do scissoring motions inside you.
You didn’t know what name to call, little sobs escaping from you and making them laugh at how pretty you looked even when being and making a mess.
You were leaking over Wonbin’s couch, leaving a big dark spot under you, and if you had been conscious enough, you would’ve stopped them, but you felt such an intense pressure approaching you that you could only concentrate on the way Wonbin’s fingers were opening you so good and how Anton wasn’t drawing circles anymore, roughly moving his hand from one side to the other to make you cum.
He could see it coming, your chest heavily moving up and down while tears pricked your eyes, and he had to show you he was true to his words, unlike Seunghan, so he decided to teach you what a real orgasm felt like.
Clenching around Wonbin’s fingers, Anton flicked your clit while Wonbin rushed his fingers into thrusting harder, making you cum with his digits inside you.
Yes, Anton kept murmuring when he saw your abdomen shaking and felt your pussy quivering under his hand.
With toes curling, legs trembling and eyes rolling, you came over their hands incredibly strong, a little gush dripping over Wonbin’s palm and his couch.
That didn’t stop them, they didn’t care that you were cumming, and they continued until you convulsed and cried for them to please stop.
It wasn’t even 9:25 and they had already given you the best orgasm of your life.
Your body was numb after they stopped, your eyes dropped closed, and the tears didn’t stop rolling down your cheeks, making Anton clean them with his thumb.
‘’Are you okay?’’ he asked you because your tears wouldn’t stop.
‘’Yes, sorry, too good’’ was the only coherent sentence that you could form.
Looking bright, Wonbin left a quick kiss on your lips, wrapping your throat with his hand to maintain you in your position for him.
Anton, wanting one too, did the same thing, with his hand on your chest instead.
Taking turns, they stole the little air you tried to retrieve, making you more dizzy with their mouths than with the weed you had smoked not long ago and the beer Wonbin had given to you so lovingly.
Your body was warm, and you weren’t sure exactly what you wanted, but your nipples were in pain, needing more than the delicate friction of Anton’s fingers over your top, and whining, you wanted them to touch you like they had just done, or even more.
‘’One more?’’ Anton asked when he saw you trying to close your legs in your place, trying to find any kind of relief.
‘’Yes, please’’ you said, and he, feeling proud of his good girl, gave your pussy a soft smack, telling you to open your legs more for him.
‘’We can give you something better than fingers’’ Wonbin said, making you turn to him, and knowing what he was referring to, you nodded.
You didn’t need to think things too much, you wanted to feel good, you were just abandoned, and if they were two boys willing to give you a good time for a night, why would you stop now?
‘’But not today’’ Wonbin continued, making you let a painful noise out.
‘’Why?’’ you asked sad.
‘’We’ve been waiting so much for you, your first time with us is not going to be this way’’ Anton answered.
You were too deep in a haze to understand him, and confused, you could only blink when you heard him.
Because they were kissing you just seconds ago, they were leaning towards you, and each of them, seeing you under them from their own side, blocked the TV and the big clock from your sight.
‘’But I want to cum’’ you cried, not caring about anything else and interrupting them from continuing with their reasons to not fuck you.
‘’That’s okay baby, all we are saying is that we won’t fuck you tonight’’ Wonbin laughed at your request, ‘’we’ll definitely make you cum one more time, we can’t let our girl go home in pain, but you need to come back in your senses if you want us to fuck you’’ he explained.
 ‘’Our girl’’ Anton caressed your cheek while Wonbin trailed down his hand from your neck to between your breasts.
That sentence seemed too dreamy for him, having waited so long to say it, not daring himself to voice it when you weren’t really his.
‘’Your girl?’’ you asked.
‘’Our girl’’ Wonbin confirmed.
They always hated the way Seunghan treated you, such a cute little thing like you should always be treated like a precious doll, with care, and spoiled with the best things.
Sadly, the lucky bastard had found you before them, and they could only see you from afar, everything, from the friendship with Seunghan to your heart eyes directed at him, stopping them.
Anton was always the one putting your drinks on Wonbin’s shopping car, and the last hated paying for unnecessary shit, judging deep inside any coloured can that he saw in the same aisle of his beers, yet he let the youngest sneak the box with the memory of your smile when you opened his fridge and found what you liked.
I’m not her boyfriend, Anton said in his mind when he ran to grab your fanta grape.
I’m not her boyfriend, Wonbin reminded himself when he tapped his card.
But now you were their girl, and they would treat you like you deserved.
Not believing what you just heard, you felt so loved with their eyes over you and his hands roaming your body that you slid down on the couch, making your cunt easier for them to access, and with some difficulty you placed your hand over your pelvis, going down a bit more to push your folds apart and expose your entrance, presenting them your little hole clenching around nothing.
‘’Your girl’’ you exhaled, weak against their care.
Anton was faster than Wonbin, his hand quickly finding your pussy and cupping it to not let the oldest fuck you with his fingers again, pushing his own inside you this time.
The other, accepting his loss, lifted your top to let your breasts free, which bounced with the fabric pulling them up and then letting them fall down naked.
Your pretty nipples begged for them to give them attention, all hard and standing since you arrived thanks to the chilly air that had impacted you on your way there.
‘’Been dying for a taste’’ Wonbin admitted, letting Anton take his place with his fingers inside you and launching his tongue to lick your bud.
His velvet tongue felt amazing on your smooth skin, making you drip more over Anton’s digits.
Anton’s fingers were a lot longer than Wonbin’s, and he easily grazed a certain spot that made you gasp and shake your head at how intense it felt, receiving more of your leaking juices as a response when he pushed it again.
‘’Too much?’’ he asked, and it was too much, but you denied it.
Pulling away, he slowly went back in, trying to make you used to him and the size of his fingers.
‘’She wants more’’ Wonbin said, caressing your cheek and obliging you to let the lip you hadn’t realized you were biting hard, free. ‘’Ain’t I right?’’ he wanted you to answer.
‘’Yes,’’ you sighed.
Gritting his teeth, Anton did the same action, but quicker this time, pulling out his fingers and pushing them back in harder and faster, making you moan and nod at the thrusts.
‘’Aw she likes it’’ Wonbin commented, hand cupping your jaw and leaving a soft kiss on your cheek while his other hand stayed playing with the nipple he was previously licking.
Anton dragged his fingers in and out, liking the vision of you frowning and moaning under him, but even more, how you were receiving more attention than what you needed from Wonbin’s part.
That was what you deserved, undivided attention and care from them, to drown in pleasure and forget about everything that wasn’t worth your time.
Only they were worth your time.
Lost in the sensation of your cunt taking his fingers so well, Anton kept pounding into you, slowly at times, to then fuck you harder and faster until you cried and tried to get away from his hand.
Wonbin’s hand that fingered you just minutes ago moved to your tummy, pressing his palm to help you get closer to your orgasm while his nose nuzzled behind your ear and his breath hit your cheek.
‘’She’s so tight’’ Anton commented, wrists almost completely stopping and thumb brushing your clit.
‘’I know, she’ll take us so good later’’ Wonbin almost groaned.
You cried when you heard that, they were fucking you so good only with their fingers, you couldn’t even imagine how good their cocks would make you feel. You squirmed in your place, trying to close your legs to stop you from becoming so sensitive, not getting far with the boy's hands gripping your thighs and maintaining you in your position for them. 
‘’You wanted to cum’’ Wonbin reminded you.
‘’Yes, I’m sorry’’ you said, biting your lip again and letting yourself be fucked by Anton’s fingers.
Anton didn’t hurry, gently moving the two fingers he had inside you in scissoring motions this time, he felt your warm and wet walls trap him.
‘’She’s going to cum’’ Wonbin said, recognizing your same expression from before, the way your chest was agitated and your body convulsing.
‘’Oh princess, cum for me’’ Anton demanded, needing to see your orgasm leaking down his hand just like you did for Wonbin.
Ruthlessly moving in and out his wrist, he enjoyed your face contorting for him and your pussy fluttering, and a heavier stream was released, making another mess over Wonbin’s couch and his hand.
You couldn’t feel your body anymore, and you had no idea at what time or how you got home, but when you woke up you were in your room with clean clothes and as relaxed as never.
Soon you were filled with anxiety, scared of how you had arrived and what would your parents say. You didn’t dare to go out of your room, and looking at the hour, you felt your nerves fall when you saw that your father had already left for work and your mother probably had gone out to do some shopping like she usually did that day.
You had no messages from any of them saying that they would talk to you later, and it was already passed midday, so you tried to think that things were probably all okay. However, you didn’t expect to see a message from Anton and Wonbin asking how you felt.
Come see us later, Wonbin had added.
What the hell had been that the day before? You stared at your wall for minutes until you decided that you wouldn’t know unless you asked it yourself.
Later that day, Sungchan opened the door for you when you arrived, his face pale at seeing you there.
You didn’t know who to ask for, so you timidly smiled at him and waited for him to simply let you in.
‘’Let her in’’ Wonbin said when he saw you, so Sungchan had no option but to let you.
Smiling, Wonbin tilted his head to where his kitchen connected with his garage, and you nodded understanding him, walking there with insecure steps.
‘’What the hell do you think you’re doing?’’ you heard Sungchan ask Wonbin in a whisper.
‘’You don’t care’’ Wonbin answered, not in a whisper.
Entering the garage, Wonbin’s couch was still there, covered only by a flannel where you dripped down, and suddenly an embarrassing memory came back to you in a flashback.
‘’I’m so sorry’’ you had apologized when the three of you observed the big spots you had left with your orgasms.
‘’It’s okay’’ Wonbin laughed, patting your back to console you.
‘’That’s kind of hot’’ Anton added, eyes focused on the way it showed perfectly how good they had treated you.
Now Anton was sitting on a single new couch that stuck out in the middle of the well-known garage, immediately smiling when he saw you.
There was a new face too, a girl sitting in the corner of the couch that reminded you of your old you, silent and feigning a smile, like when you waited for Seunghan to come back when he left you in painful silence with his friends the first days.
You walked to Anton, still wary, but more confident after he seemed happy to see you there.
‘’Hey,’’ Anton said, taking your hand to play with the tips of your fingers, to then pull you closer and make you sit on his lap.
His arms wrapped your waist perfectly, letting a greeting kiss behind your ear that made you giggle, making you feel comfortable on your new seat.
You felt the eyes of the new girl staring at you, and not wanting to be rude anymore, you talked.
‘’Hi,’’ you finally addressed the girl in the room when Anton rested his chin on your shoulder, closing his eyes and inhaling the aroma of your shampoo like he had been dreaming for months, ‘’Sorry’’ you continued, presenting yourself.
The girl denied with a cute smile, telling you that it was okay, and presenting herself as Seunghan’s new girlfriend.
‘’Seunghan’s girlfriend…’’ you repeated. She was cute, collected, calm, like you were when he met you.
‘’Yes, we just started seeing each other this month, how long have you been together?’’ she asked you, surely referring to you and Anton like a couple.
‘’Oh, it hasn’t been long’’ Anton answered for you.
A second later Sohee walked in, looking puzzled out for seeing you there, and especially, over Anton’s lap.
Almost immediately the rest of the boys came to the garage, all except Wonbin, becoming silent at the sight in front of them. Seunghan, who was more astonished than the others, froze at the entrance without understanding what he was looking at, his new girlfriend in the same room with his ex-girlfriend sitting over his bandmate’s lap.
Wonbin was the one who got him out of his confused state, pushing him to the side so he could cross the room to meet you, and sitting on the arm of the small new couch, he gave you a soft kiss on the lips, surprising everyone there, including you.
‘’We hope you all give us your blessings’’ Wonbin smiled, posing his cheek next to yours while Anton continued with his arms around your waist and his face hidden on your neck.
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often-daydreaming · 7 days
Text
A Quick Chat
'Absolutely not!'
'I'm just gonna talk with him!'
Following the quickly escalating shouts down to the Batcave Bruce found Dick and a heavily armed Tim at each other's throats while their siblings oh so helpfully egged them on.
They were arguing about Wally and their last universal saving mission for some reason and Tim had nearly every contingency he could think of to handle a speedster on him.
-nna talk, that's it!'
'Then you can leave the gear here!'
'What's going on?'
All of his children froze, finally realizing he was here before they started shouting over each other.
'You remem-'
'-ick's trying to-'
'Father Dr-'
'-ng crazy, just because the universe re-'
'Enough!'
'Now, can someone tell me what's going on or do I have to get Alfred?'
And Jason was happy enough to tell him. 'Replacement's pissed because we finally discovered a pretty big difference with the universe after the League hit the reset button.'
Multiple screens on the Batcomputer held information on new heroes, a Junior JLD and everything Tim could dig up on two individuals. The first one was Phantom, a new addition to the Titans and had a number of detailed conspiracy theories tracking his appearances through time while the other held the detailed background information of a recently graduated Daniel James Fenton. Tim had dug up everything from his kindergarten grades to... Oh... Oh no... That explains why they were arguing about Wally.
Most of Daniel's latest online post covered his move to Gotham, his new job offer working in their engineering department and his new boyfriend Bernard. Looking at it all made it painfully easy to piece together that... 'They stole my life!'
And Dick and Tim were arguing again but Bruce knew it wouldn't get too heated and focused his attention on the gathered information. It was easy to see that a number of encounters his kids (mainly his oldest three) should have had with the Titans were adjusted just enough to fit Phantom now and Tim's involvement with the Children of Dionysus had been shifted around to involve Daniel in this new universe.
'-e universe reset doesn't mean you can ruin their lives. Phantom seems like a good kid.'
'Dowd would have left you eventually.'
Dick had to hold Tim back from launching himself at Damien while Jason and Steph stood by egging the two of them on, but then Tim got that look in his eye when Duke brought up the idea of reintroducing himself and everyone noticed.
'No.'
'Come on. Tim, you don't need another restraining order.'
'But it didn't happen in this universe so it doesn't count.'
'It counts if we still remember it!'
But Tim wasn't listening, too busy changing out of all of his gear as a plan quickly started forming together in his mind.
Why waste time with Wally when he can just as easily win over the new couple while ignoring everything else he's learned from his friends.
He'd figure it out one mess at a time. After he won Bernard back he'd figure out the situation between Red Robin and Phantom.
-_- -_- -_-
Reading over the sticky note Danny couldn't help but wonder what Clockwork meant when he wrote 'Have Fun'.
Again, I blame my medication for this, but this came from a couple of different prompts about Tim, Bernard and Danny and I just sort of went with it. Basically the main roster of the League has to stop (Pick a threat) and end up resitting the universe again. The problem is they still remember the old universe so they spend a week or two looking up any big changes and a sleep deprived Tim starts believing he barely knows Bernard in this universe when he's actually dating him and Danny. He just hasn't dug deep enough to figure out his own connection.
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princessbrunette · 1 month
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when spoiledexgf!reader ponders on her relationship with rafe, it always come down to one thing. how on earth did they end up together in the first place? her scowl upon thinking of this would often soften into a reminiscent smile in realisation. it was his attitude that drew her in.
you remember where you were— at the county club, shock horror, and you were all alone. you weren’t in the mood to socialise that day, after one hundred things had already pissed you off you were simply there to pick up some lunch and head on home.
you frequented there, so you knew all the faces. even guys like rafe cameron, who would always stare or have something to say like you didn’t know all his tricks already. yes he was fine, but he was going to have to work a lot harder if he wanted to actually stand out.
you totter through the club in glittery sandals headed straight through to the bar where you could order your food and drink to go. you do so, and stay there whilst you wait for the order to be prepared. you’re actually lost in thought, tapping your nails on the plastic menu on the counter before you feel a big looming presence at your side.
rafe cameron leans on the counter top, already that smug little smile on his face. the one that made him look all smarmy and expensive. he’s nursing a whiskey in his hand despite the time being only along the lines of 4PM — and you move along slightly, clearing your throat. now he’s just blatantly staring at you.
rolling your eyes, you feel your lashes kiss your brows as you turn to face him. “can i help you?”
his mouth turns down in amusement as he holds his hands up defensively. “nah, just here to talk. is that… is that not okay?” he plays it off like a nice guy, but you know how fucking crazy he is. you’ve heard the tales. the future version of yourself bangs on the glass wall of the memory, begging you to just walk away.
you say nothing, turning to face the front once more. this doesn’t deter rafe from making conversation.
“y’know i uh, couldn’t help but notice how good you look today… i mean you always look fine as hell but today… mhm.” he hums, taking a sip of his whiskey and you feel him lean back just a little so he can eye you.
“thanks.” you state blankly, trying to ignore the way his special attention warmed your stomach ever so slightly. you wanted to slap yourself for being so pathetic.
“yeah… for sure.” he licks his lips before moving up alongside you to stand closer. “look, lemme get to know you, alright? i’ll take you out.” he offers.
“i have a man.” you blurt out, and it’s instantly met with a scoff that melts into a strained chuckle as he runs a hand down his face, shaking his head. oh? you blink at him. it wasn’t technically a lie. you were seeing someone, whether or not you’d call him your man was unimportant. “what?”
“nah, nothing.” he smirks, still clearly amused as the aftershock of his laugh still bubbles past his lips. “you got a man, huh? then uh, why are you here… ordering n’payin’ for your own shit?” he reaches down and gently plucks your hand off the counter, observing it. “and uh, why are your nails not done? yeah i’m not sure this guy knows what he’s doing ‘cause uh—”
you snatch your hand away, feeling your face heat as you huff. “its not your business.” you stare up at him, probably thinking you look real intimidating but those doe eyes only made you reflect the appearance of an angry little kitty-cat. you’re distracted, so when the country club worker returns with your food in its to go box, rafe maintains the eye contact with a lazy smirk, leaning over you to tap his card on the reader, paying for it.
“you’re welcome.” he states, before sliding your phone off the counter where you’d rested it and holding it out for you to take. “guess you owe me now huh? why don’t you go ahead and unlock your phone so i can put my number in there n’i’ll go ahead n’call it even. alright?” he raises his eyebrows, and you couldn’t believe it — but something about the way he was handling you made you wanna back down. submit like prey. you swallow, feeling that attitude disappearing little by little as you silently unlock your phone and hand it to him on the contact page.
he smiles, satisfied and nods before typing it in and handing it back. “text me. i’ll get you right.” he lets his lips curl up a little again, all pleased with himself as he finally steps out of your space — instantly striding off without a glance over his shoulder as he heads towards one of his friends that had just entered.
you couldn’t help your intrigue. but as the famous saying goes, curiosity killed the cat.
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augustinewrites · 1 year
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“i’ve got the ice cream!” gojo announces as he steps into the apartment.
despite the urgency conveyed over his call with you, not a soul appears to greet him like the hero that he is. instead, he’s greeted by the perked ears and alert looks of four shikigami wolves lounging under the sun rays stretched across the kitchen floor.
he carefully steps over them to grab four spoons. “where are your summoners?”
your dogs tilt their heads, pretending not to understand him. megumi’s puppies don’t even bother with pretending, turning around and setting their fluffy bottoms down with a huff.
“useless animals,” he scoffs, venturing into the apartment to look for everyone. 
he eventually finds the three of you in the bedroom, you and tsumiki cuddling in bed watching some chick-flick while megumi reads in the armchair. 
“finally,” you grin when you see him, pausing the film to take the bag and spoons from his hands. “thank you.”
“what’s going on here?” he asks as you distribute ice cream pints and spoons. 
“tsumiki didn’t say “i love you” back to her boyfriend,” megumi quips, his sister throwing a pillow and a glare in his direction. 
gojo looks at you, brows furrowed, but you only send him a pleading look.
“well,” he starts, sitting on the edge of the bed. “love is a big emotion, kid. it can take a long time to develop, or sometimes you just know like that,” he says, snapping his fingers. 
“how long did it take you two to say it?” 
this time when he looks at you, you look away. you hate how much he loves this story. 
he can’t help the giddy feeling fluttering in his chest. 
“you tell her,” you mutter.
“why? you were the one who said it first. it also led to our first kiss remember?”
“and as i recall, you didn’t say you loved me back right away.” 
ah, you never fail to remind him. 
“i didn’t get the chance. you just started kissing me and tearing my clothes off. then you immediately dragged me into bed and had your way with me,” he recalls, sighing dreamily as megumi covers his ears.
“i did not kiss you first,” you argue, like you always do. “i don’t kiss on first dates!”
“you did that night.”
“no, i said that i loved you, and then you kissed me.” 
he looks at you for a moment. really looks at you. he supposes that first kiss had been over nearly ten years ago, he couldn’t really fault you for forgetting. he didn’t even remember what he’d had for breakfast this morning. 
“alright, you win,” he relents, shuffling up the bed to sit against the headboard, pulling you into his chest and kissing your temple. 
_____
his first date with you ends up being five years after he meets you. 
by then, he’d already known he loved you. hell, some deep, subconscious part of him had known since he was seventeen years old.
so, two years after he’d made a deal with your father, he asked you on a date. 
the date goes well. a nice dinner at a nice restaurant in roppongi, followed by a movie in the apartment you’d eventually move into. he’d successfully put his arm around you and leaned in to tell jokes that’d made you laugh.  
being with you has always been easy, even back then. there’s no awkwardness on your first date, just the blossoming feeling of something exciting and new growing between you.
(because you were in love with him too.)
“i should head home,” you sigh around 11pm, moving to lift your head from where it’s been laying against his shoulder. “i have lesson plans to prep for next week.”
“don’t go,” he’s quick to insist. “stay. i have two spare rooms. i already have one set up for you.”
you look at him for a moment, like you’re seeing him for the first time. “you do?”
“i wasn’t going to make you go home by yourself in the middle of the night,” he shrugs, averting his gaze and feeling shy all of a sudden. 
“i don’t have any clothes—”
“just wear something of mine.”
that was mistake number one, because when you’d come out of the bathroom wearing one of his shirts, he’s still pretty sure he’d blacked out for a second.
mistake number two was staying up late, chatting. this wasn’t uncommon for the two of you, but for some reason that night had felt…intimate. you’d had your legs in his lap, illuminated by the faint glow of the television as you chatted. 
mistake number three was helping you walk to the spare room, an arm looped around your sleepy figure as you leaned into him.
he still remembers the way his heart had been thumping loudly in his chest as you gazed up at him, pressing a kiss to his cheek. “goodnight,” you murmured. “i love you.”
he’d stood there, blinking uselessly as he watched realization pass over your face. “satoru…”
he says your name back, suddenly terrified. he remembers how the fear seized his heart, because all at once, you’d become someone he could lose. he has a history of people leaving. whether it was by choice or not, it always hurt. he wants you so badly, but he also knows that losing you would break him. 
it must be written all over his face, these unsaid fears and hesitations that were plaguing his mind. that was when you’d stepped forward and gently cupped the sides of his face, pulling him in for a kiss. 
______
“sometimes you just know when you love someone,” you tell tsumiki, brushing some stray hairs from her face. “i don’t really know how to explain it.”
“it’s just a feeling,” gojo agrees, still looking at you. “a pretty great one, that leads to even greater things of you give it a chance.”
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bleedingoptimism · 9 months
Text
They hear the ‘ding’ of the elevator as they walk inside the very luxurious building and Robin grabs Steve’s hand and makes them run to the door yelling, “Hold! Please!”
A hand covered in rings and with short nails painted black appears from inside and holds the door for them. They get in as Robin breathes out little ‘thank yous’ under her breath and Steve smiles at the gentleman who helped them. His brows go up a little at how handsome the man is. He’s wearing black dress pants and a black silk shirt under an also black suit jacket. The whole look is expensive and the man wears it very well. With his long curly hair tied at the back of his neck, plus the rings, the nails, and the surprising amount of piercings in his ears, he looks like a rockstar. He has a cute nose and full lips that look very enticing and big beautiful brown eyes that are looking back at him. 
Steve smiles once more and nods politely figuring he should stop staring. They have to go up like a billion floors or something so this is going to be a long elevator ride. Probably shouldn’t make their traveling companion uncomfortable. 
He distracts himself by looking at Robin, fixing her hair behind her ear. She looks great. Slack pants and a tight dress shirt in grey tones with black suspenders adorned with metal cufflinks. Short hair loose and just the right amount of disheveled and a graphic eyeliner so sharp it could cut you. He would know. He did her makeup. They were asked to dress party chick but professional, which neither of them knew what the hell meant but Steve is pretty sure Robin nailed it. He just hopes he did a good job too.
He’s wearing a white thigh shirt of a soft material he couldn’t for the life of him remember the name of and black dress pants, the ones that fit him like a second skin, paired with a big leather belt, just to add a little extra. He tries to inconspicuously check himself out in the mirrors of the elevator but accidentally meets eyes with the well-dressed man again. Who adverts his gaze quickly and Steve realizes he just caught him checking him out. He smiles to himself and looks down bashfully only to be horrified by what he notices because, his white shirt? The stupid fabric he can’t name? Totally sheer. Well not totally, but a little. Like he can see his nipples right now a little.
Oh my god. Oh my god.
“Robin, we need to go.” he suddenly says grabbing Robin by the back of the elbow. 
Robin turns to him previously just nervously watching the floor numbers change and frowns worried, “What? We are already here, Steve! What do mean?”
“I need to go home and change Robin! I can’t-” He whispers to her, although he knows it’s in vain, there’s no way the handsome man isn’t about to hear a very embarrassing conversation. 
“We are literally in the elevator. We are not going back home so you can change!” Robin huffs annoyed now that she knows it wasn’t anything more serious, “What’s wrong with your clothes?” she asks pinching his shirt between her fingers.
Steve turns his back to the man and crowds Robin, facing her, “Can you see my nipples?” he asks trying to keep his voice low but he hears a cough that sounds suspiciously like a chuckle behind him. 
Robin looks at him like he’s lost his mind but, as always she goes with it, “Yes?” 
Steve puts his palms over them and gasps and Robin starts laughing “What are you doing?” she says between giggles at the same time Steve exclaims, “I can’t show our new boss my nipples!” 
“Steve, what?! I thought it was on purpose! You know, just a peek, a little chess hair, a little nipple.” Robin says still laughing but stops when she sees Steve is looking actually distressed. 
She huffs and runs her hands up and down his arms comfortingly.
“Why would I want to show them my nipples!” Steve groans and Robin shrugs.
“It’s sexy? We were asked to dress for a party”
“Why would I want to look sexy for work?” Steve asks again, still trying to convince Robin to let him go home and change.
But Robin tilts her head to the side, “But you can’t turn that off, though? Like, you are always sexy.”
Instantly his mood changes and he smiles and coos at her, “Aww, that’s so sweet, babe! But you are biased…”
Robin scoffs at being babied and raises an eyebrow, “How am I biased?”
“Because you love me!” Steve answers like it’s obvious. And Robin nods as if taking in the information.
“Okay. I see your biases and I raise you the following point: It’s objective. Because I’m a lesbian.”
Steve laughs, but he’s not the only one. For a second, Steve had forgotten they had an audience member. A very handsome audience member. He blushes, the guy must think he’s such an idiot. But at least he thinks they are funny. He turns back to his side and smiles at him again. 
But Robin suddenly jumps a little beside him, like she had just noticed him, and says, “Stranger! Opinion?”
“Rob, no-” Steve starts but Robin leans over him to talk to the man, “Shirt. Good? Bad?” She says moving her hands in front of Steve as if she was showcasing him. Steve blushes some more and tries to keep a neutral face. So he ends up just white-man smiling awkwardly.
The man chuckles again and then looks at Steve from top to bottom and back again, “You look good,” he says smirking.
And Steve's blush deepens. But Robin either doesn’t notice or is enjoying it, because she keeps questioning him, “Good. What are thinking? Slutty or sexy?”
The man leans his head to the side, his eyes roaming over Steve's chest and Steve has to resist the urge to cover his nipples again.
“It’s sexy.” he says, voice deep and serious as if this was an important conversation and not Robin and Steve being dumbasses, “Like, sophisticated sexy.”
Steve shakes himself to try to make his blush go away and addresses the man, “I- well, thank you, first. And second, I’m sorry you were dragged into this. But would you want to look sexy meeting your new boss?” he asks him.
He taps his chin in thought and then says, “Your friend is right though, are already here. Just don’t flirt with them and you'll be fine!” 
At that Steve purses lips and Robin snorts rudely. “That might be a problem,” she says.
The man laughs surprised and Steve can’t help but think he has a really nice laugh, “How?” he asks them.
“Steve has a little miscommunication problem,” Robin explains, “When he tries to be charming people think he's flirting.”
Steve crosses his arms and huffs making the few locks that fall on his forehead lift a bit and fall back down, “I have no idea what I’m doing wrong! I’m just trying to be nice..”
The man is looking at him with raised eyebrows and he blinks a couple of times before snickering, “Looks like your friend is right, again. You just can’t turn sexy off, uh?”
Robin laughs really hard at that and Steve goes back to full tomato status.
“I could've tried!” he says, not even sure what are they arguing about anymore.
“How?” Robin asks him amused.
“I don’t know, a big sweater? Something knitted, comfy?” he tries but they both shake their head at him.
“That sounds sexy too,” The man says and Steve frowns,
“Literally. How?” 
“It gives off fuck vibes. Like you are really fuckable,” he says, and then his eyes go wide and he bites his lips.
Robin’s eyes go wide too and she snorts, looking at Steve who is just staring at the guy with his mouth hanging slightly open.
“Sorry!” the man says, raising his hands in mock surrender, “That was so out of line- I- oh! Saved by the bell it seems,” he says when the elevator dings, “This is my floor”
The doors open and Argyle and Jon are on the other side and Steve realizes, this is also their floor.
“Eddie!” Argyle says as the man moves towards him and they shake hands enthusiastically. 
“Steve, Robin” Jon greets them with a smile as they slowly walk out of the elevator, watching Eddie’s deer-in-the-headlights expression.
“Ah! I hope you had a pleasant elevator ride and didn’t do anything awkward!” Argyle jokes completely oblivious, “I’m a little sad I didn’t get to introduce you guys!”
“...What do you mean?” Robin asks with a forced smile.
“Steve, Robin: This Eddie Munson!” Argyle says moving behind Steve and Robin and hugging them by the shoulders so they stand directly in front of Eddie, “Your new boss!”
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evergone · 8 months
Text
Lonely
Theodore Nott x Legilimens! reader
Warnings: Swearing.
Description: The reader has no friends until destiny (in the form of a boy named Theodore Nott) does everything to make her feel like she belongs.
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In your first year, you were put in a dorm by yourself. You heard so many times that this was a gift — a sign of your good fortune, Professor Trelawney said — as everyone else in your year group had to share with someone else, but you, the introvert you were, were left to your own devices. Despite these assumptions, you quickly discovered that sharing a dorm was central to establishing friendships, and you spent the vast majority of your high school life friendless and alone.
At times, your boredom and your loneliness were so all-encompassing that you would read the minds of the first years who you knew wouldn’t be capable of sensing the imposition upon their thoughts. None of them thought of much. The boys were preoccupied with daydreams of girls and music (most of them were very into hip-hop as was the popular culture of the nineties), and the girls were nearly all stressing about parties and school work.
You were as much at ease with your situation as one could possibly be. You were of the mindset that if there was nothing you could do about it, why bother? Everyone had their cliques, their friends, and you were just the one to be left out. Your only goal was to get through the remaining year, then you would leave school, rent a house somewhere obscure, become a writer or an archaeologist or something else fun, and start your life over again. But it appeared that destiny had other plans.
Destiny, that supreme, omniscient, omnipotent concept that dwindled above and twisted within the interactions of all peoples, came to you in a free period you were spending in the library. The period before had been Charms, but that was of no consequence, neither was the fact that you had no more classes until later that night when you would make the journey to the Astronomy tower. You were sitting at a desk in the far left corner of the library, tucked between the pages of a number of books written by Z-named authors of some incredibly niche portion of history when Madam Pince’s high-pitched and troubled voice disturbed your rather unproductive attempts to finish your homework.
Ever bored, and hardly ever entertained, you leant to the side to see around the long bookcase. To your surprise, your eyes immediately met with a pair of blue ones. The irises were mere spots lost in the oceans of colour and they darted between you and Madam Pince, desperate for assistance. Behind those eyes, you could hear his mind asking for your help. If you was slightly smarter, you would’ve avoided this person’s gaze altogether and returned to your work.
“Madam Pince,” you said before allowing yourself a moment to think, and the frustrated librarian’s head turned to you in owl-like frustration, “Is everything okay?”
“Not at all,” she said, her voice an angry whisper, “Mr Nott should be in class, instead, he’s here violating my books!”
You glanced at the owner of the eyes. The green lining of his robe told you he was from your house, so you knew him even if only from afar. He hung out with the big group of your housemates most of the time, but you’d observed that he often sat by himself in the common room and the others intruded on his personal time. He was tall — probably six feet or so — and thin, with hair that was darker than blond, but most definitely not as dark as some of his friends’ hair. In the traditional sense, he was handsome, but you’d heard him speak in class before, and his voice bore an awkward intonation as if to speak was to curse which made him seem almost as nerdy as yourself. Despite this, every movement he made seemed elegant no matter his emotion, this was so inherent of a feature that even in that moment — when he was so clearly itching to turn and run — he was like a swan. His name was Theodore Nott, and you’d never spoken to him before.
“He’s supposed to be helping me with my homework,” you blurted out and Madam Pince quirked a pencilled-on eyebrow, “You know I’m terrible with, uh, Ancient Runes.” You both had that class together.
“Yeah,” nodded Theo as he stepped around her and stood by your side, “The professor said it was okay, I’m surprised she didn’t tell you.”
“As am I,” she frowned, “Tell her not to let this happen again.”
“Yes, Madam.”
With an irritated hum, she left the two of you alone. Theo turned to face you once she was out of earshot, and let out a sigh of relief before sitting down on the edge of the desk you were at.
“You’re in Slytherin,” he said obviously, “What year?”
You sucked in a breath of air, “Sixth. Yours.”
“Oh.”
His brain exploded with a million thoughts at once, his conscious and subconscious fighting for dominance. You could hear the embarrassment as he reprimanded himself for not knowing, and the confusion as he searched his memories for some sign that he had, in fact, seen you before.
“We have Potions together, and Astronomy, and Divination, and Ancient Runes, and… most of our classes, actually.” You shrugged without a care.
Theo cringed, “Sorry. I don’t think I’ve ever noticed you before.”
“I don’t really make my presence known,” you said, “So don’t worry about it.”
“I’m Theodore Nott,” he introduced himself, hand outstretched towards you, “What’s your name? I don’t want to make the same mistake next time.”
“Y/n L/n,” you said and shook his hand. It was soft and had no callouses at all.
“I best be off, I’m missing Arithmancy.”
“Boring.”
“You’re telling me,” he chuckled and left the library.
Over the course of that afternoon, you were unable to tear your mind away from Theo, and none of your homework was completed as a result. You didn’t go to dinner in the Great Hall. Your mind was much too preoccupied to eat.
At eleven-thirty, your alarm sounded, and you washed your face in preparation for Astronomy. Professor Sinistra demanded that all her students wore their uniforms for her classes, even if said classes were at midnight, but there wasn’t a single person who ever did that other than Hermione Granger. Everyone else tended to pull their robes overtop their pyjamas and call it a day, yourself included.
The lesson wasn’t all that interesting as Sinistra had the class chart some stars for the whole hour. However, you barely managed to get anything done because you were so distracted by Theo who was sitting peacefully at the opposite side of the tower amongst his friends. Including Theo, there were five of them (you didn’t include Crabbe and Goyle, who you always thought were less friends than goons, or Millicent Bulstrode or Tracey Davis, both of whom you knew were periodically hated by the others). Two girls, three boys.
Pansy Parkinson, Daphne Greengrass, Blaise Zabini, Draco Malfoy, and finally, Theo. At seventeen, his hair was a mostly consistent length of woody brown curls that sat fluffily on his head — if anything it was maybe a bit shorter on the sides. His eyebrows were thick as they always were, and in that particular Astronomy lesson, they were hard pressed against the tips of his long eyelashes that seemed almost too feminine to belong to him. By far the most intriguing and attractive aspect of Theo was, of course, the prominent mole on his left cheek that stole your attention away from a tight-lipped smile he had thrown your way.
Your immediate reaction was to blush and avert your eyes, but upon glancing back and noticing he was still staring, you offered him a short wave. He nodded in response before turning to Draco and saying something too far away for you to hear.
The next morning, or, perhaps, later that morning is the right expression, you went to breakfast in the Great Hall. Not having eaten dinner the night prior had left you so completely starving. You could’ve eaten a pegasus. You sat down on the edge of the Slytherin table by yourself, and loaded a plate with two eggs, about five slices of bacon (it very well could have been more, your memory isn’t perfect), a piece of toast, and a spoonful of baked beans.
“Where are all your friends?”
You looked up to see Theo standing over you chewing on the end of a breadstick.
“Why do you ask?” you questioned.
“Because you’re sitting here by yourself and it looks a bit pathetic, L/n,” laughed Theo teasingly.
“I don’t really have any friends.”
“Oh,” said Theo, “Sorry I asked.”
You shrugged, and as he glanced to the middle of the table you shoved as much of the baked beans into your mouth as possible, and quickly swallowed them. Merlin’s beard, you were so embarrassed.
“Give me a sec,” he said absentmindedly and you almost thought to use your Legilimency on him, “I’ll be right back.”
He placed his breadstick in front of you as if it were a deposit meant to reassure you that he’d be back, but you weren’t fazed either way. You watched as he jogged over to his group of friends and started chatting with them, but never sat down. With his right hand, he motioned back at you, and you glanced away as the rest of them turned to get a good look at you. Suddenly, you were concerned about how well your makeup was applied, and if your uniform looked good, and if there was still too much food on your plate. And then, all of them stood up with their plates, and followed Theo over to sit around you.
Most of them sat on the other side of the table, but Theo sat next to you, and Blaise by his other side. He introduced you to everyone: Goyle, Crabbe, Draco, Pansy, Daphne, Blaise, himself (“but you know me already,” he’d joked).
“It’s crazy to think we don’t know you despite being in the same house as you for the past six years,” said Daphne and Pansy elbowed her in the waist, sending her a death glare.
“Excuse her,” Pansy smiled awkwardly, “She’s a bitch.”
Your ears tickled at the word. You weren’t used to people calling those they were friends with such vulgar names… You weren’t used to the idea of friends at all.
Draco started rattling off about half-bloods and “that darn Potter,” spurring his friends into a rather heated conversation. They laughed and cackled loudly at each other, entirely easy around you as if it didn’t matter at all that they didn’t know you.
“Is this okay?” Theo asked you in a whisper once the group had moved on to another topic of conversation.
“Yes, this is nice,” you responded with a blush over your cheeks as you tried not to smile, “I don’t remember the last time I spoke to so many people.”
Theo’s eyes softened, glazed with a thin layer of water that informed you of his empathy. He felt your loneliness as if it was his own. The image of a young version of himself locked in his bedroom, wailing for his long deceased mother, flashed in his memories and seeped into your brain. An involuntary consequence of your extraordinary Legilimency talent.
When Saturday finally arrived, you slept in the whole morning. You only awoke at the sound of a knock on your door followed by a series of laughter at ten o’clock. You rolled out of bed, and for a moment stopped in horror of your hair in front of the mirror to quickly tie it up, and then opened the door.
You were surprised to see Pansy and Daphne there, but even more so when Daphne asked, “It’s Hogsmeade day, why aren’t you ready?”
“Huh?” You said, squinting at the light of the hallway.
“Theo sent us up to grab you, get some clothes on and let’s go,” said Pansy as she pushed past you and slipped into your room, Daphne hot on her heel, “Merlin’s beard, there’s absolutely nothing in here.”
“Yeah, uh, I’ve got it all to myself,” you muttered.
“Oh, that’s got to be terribly boring,” said Pansy.
Both of the girls made themselves at home as they rummaged through your drawers looking for something nice to wear. They were both dressed very well themselves, and it made you a little self-conscious to think they were going to see all your cheap clothes.
Pansy threw a sheer white shirt you didn’t know you had and a pair of bootleg jeans onto your bed while Daphne kicked over some matching joggers and a big white handbag you’d stolen from your mother.
“It is terribly boring,” you said.
As the three of you descended the stairs (after you got dressed, of course), you could already hear the sounds of masculine voices teetering on yelling at one another. One of them you knew to be Theo’s, and while you weren’t particularly familiar with them, you were inclined to assume the other two voices were Draco and Blaise. At the bottom step out of the girls’ dormitory hallway, you were proven correct when you saw them bickering like old men at a weekend golf tournament.
Draco was the first to notice the three of you, and his grey eyes lit up at the sight, “L/n, come settle an argument for us.”
You walked to join the small group and stood beside Theo, your handbag held meekly between your fingers, the nails of which had magenta paint flaking off them.
“Your mate Theo here—” Draco gestured to him with an uninterested hand, and you nearly laughed at the idea that Theo was your mate more than he was any of the others’— “Thinks that we ought to have a Legilimens registry like we have for Animagi. Frankly, I think it’s absolutely blasphemous that we even have one for Animagi; let them run wild, I say! What are your thoughts? Don’t mind the coincidental pun.”
“I’m afraid I’m a bit biased in this conversation,” you spoke quietly.
“How do you mean?”
The faces of the group stared at you with raised brows, and eyes that glistened with interest, and you were red from the attention.
“Well, I’m a Legilimens,” you admitted, “So, I’d have to disagree with you, Theo, for my own sake.”
“Are you really?” Theo asked to break the silence, and you nodded shyly.
“That’s so cool!” Daphne all but squealed, “What number am I thinking of?”
“Seven.”
She brightened with delight, and slapped Pansy’s arm, encouraging her to try your magic out like a little game. Pansy did just that, and you ended up going around the whole group, describing what they were thinking of. Eight. Twelve. Bakery. Seven. And Theo was questioning why you weren’t already on the way to Hogsmeade.
With that final thought, they grew disillusioned by the game, and you began the walk to Hogsmeade.
You’d never been into town with other people before, not that you went much at all. You usually stayed in your room, or wandered the halls, towering over the first and second years who weren’t allowed to go on weekend Hogsmeade trips yet. But there you were, forming one kink in a string of knots engaging in stimulating conversation about the current condition of the world, and even boring conversation about the homework for Defense Against the Dark Arts which, to you, seemed so thrilling even if only for the fact that it was verbal discourse in some form. You’d forgotten what it was to converse with others.
“Is there anywhere you need to go once we get there?” said Theo once you were nearing the end of the path and closing in on the town.
“I would have been awake before Daphne and Pansy got to my room if I planned to go anywhere today,” you joked and he smiled, “If you don’t mind, I might just go wherever you go.”
All he offered in response was a hum, and it left you thinking that you’d somehow made the air around you awkward. You’d later come to learn that he was just like that, never much of a talker if he thought the situation didn’t call for it.
Almost instantly after you passed sign that read ‘Welcome to Hogsmeade,’ the group dispersed, and Theo and yourself were left to do as you pleased.
Your companion, it seemed, didn’t have much he wanted to do either, so he led you to the Three Broomsticks. Kindly, he offered to pay for a butterbeer or two, but you didn’t think you were close enough for that, so you humbly told him it was alright. You sat in relative silence until our drinks arrived when Theo struck up some conversation.
“What have you been doing all these years by yourself, L/n?” He asked.
“I don’t know… Stuff…”
Theo laughed, and you laughed along with him. Your mind was frazzled by the alcohol, which kept refilling itself as you chatted on, and every so often you found thoughts that didn’t belong to you creeping into your mind, but you couldn’t place who they belonged to. It was just the odd word — sad, or pretty, or damned, or Y/n.
“Nott, are you and Malfoy good friends?” You asked.
“Yeah, why wouldn’t we be?”
“You seem to argue quite a bit.”
“He’s just like that,” said Theo, “Likes to start shit for no reason, that one.”
You giggled, and he grinned happily. Another person’s thoughts seeped into yours once again, that time a full sentence: ‘I love her laugh.’
The bell that hung over the entrance to the Three Broomsticks jingled, and though you couldn’t see it behind you, you watched as Theo’s expression morphed into one of guilt. You turned over your shoulder, and made out the figures of the four people who had come with you. Each of them were wearing a disappointed look on their faces.
“What in the name of Merlin are you two doing?” asked Pansy, her tone equal parts concerned and amused.
“Nothing,” said Theo.
“Yeah, if ‘nothing’ is code for drinking all day,” said Blaise, “Snape’s gonna have your asses for this.”
The others guided yourself and Theo back to the castle. Your hand was attached to Pansy’s forearm, Theo’s arm was slung over Draco’s shoulder. By the time you reached the Slytherin common room, You were sober enough to move on your own, and thus, started your way up to your dorm.
“Where are you going?” Theo asked curiously. He was far away enough that you couldn’t smell his breath which stunk like the vomit he’d expelled from his body halfway through the walk back.
“My room,” you said.
“No, no, no.” He shook his head and then closed his eyes from the dizziness. “It’s sleepover night. You have to come to our dorm, I made room for you on my bed.”
“I used to sleep there because he’s got the best mattress out of the three of them, but we figured you might prefer to sleep beside him than Blaise,” Daphne explained.
“Oh,” you breathed, “Do I need to contribute anything?”
You hadn’t had a sleepover before. You didn’t know the proper protocol. You assumed one would need to bring at least their pyjamas and a pillow, maybe some sweets of some kind to share. But Theo shook his head, and you were in the boys’ room before you knew what was happening.
The boys’ dorm room was the opposite of yours. So exquisitely full, and intricately messy. The three beds were all the same size as yours with dark green bed hangings, and each about a metre apart.
Closest to the door and to their small shared bathroom was Theo’s bed. On the right, beside the door to the bathroom, he had a tower of books that acted as a wall. His sheets were black, but his pillows and blanket cover were a dark oceanic blue-green. There wasn’t much room, but you spied a large mess under his bed which you assumed was what he’d removed from the bed to make space. On his bedside table sat a small lamp that provided the only light in the room before Daphne declared it was far too ‘dark and gloomy’ and turned on the central light.
On the floor, directly under the light, there was a large medieval-style rug that bore our house crest, and the others sat on it lazily, ushering you over.
“I need a smoke,” said Draco, and he walked over to the window where the ashtray was.
“Me too,” said Theo as he also moved to the window, “You want one, L/n?”
“I’ve never smoked before.”
“Then I shouldn’t get you in the habit,” he smiled, “It is such a terrible habit to have. Costs more than it’s worth.”
He pulled a box of cigarettes from his pocket and offered one to Draco, and they both lit them with their wands.
“Does it taste nice?” You asked.
“Not particularly,” said Theo.
“Why do you do it then?”
“You’re so curious, L/n,” Draco teased.
Theo playfully slapped him on the chest, “Leave her alone,” he said, and then turned to you, “I’m an addict.”
“That’s got to be bad for your lungs, Nott,” you frowned, suddenly concerned.
“Don’t you worry about him,” said Pansy, a knowing smirk on her lips that told you she was well aware you’d continue worrying.
The night went on much shorter than you wished for it to. You’d hoped, perhaps too eagerly, that none of you would ever sleep. Far too much did you enjoy being awake with those people who you’d met too late in yout life. You were truly happy to have met them because for all the simple joys you’d managed to discover in your time alone, none were half as happy as those grand joys you found with them
You all took turns getting changed in the small bathroom (Theo lent you a shirt to wear), then you all slid into our respective beds. You were nervous about sleeping beside Theo because, in truth, you didn’t really know him. But he placed a pillow between you, and only faced you for a moment — a moment in which there was a look in his eyes that you couldn’t decipher, a moment in which you attempted to read his mind all too late — and then he kissed his fingers, and he touched them to your head, and he turned the other way.
“Did you sleep well?” Theo said once he noticed you were awake the next morning.
“I’ve never slept beside someone before,” you explained nervously, “I think it was a decent experience. I hope I didn’t move around too much.”
“Not at all, L/n,” he said.
A hum escaped your mouth, and you were acutely aware that Theo was watching you as you stared up at the roof of his room. Painted on it, Sistine Chapel-style, was a beautiful lush green forest.
“L/n. It’s so formal to call you by your surname.” Theo let out a disapproving tut.
“I call you by yours?” You said as you looked at him from the corner of your eye.
“You’re the only one who does.”
“It’s your name!” You raised your voice slightly before lowering it again so as to not wake any of the others up. “What else am I supposed to call you?”
“Theo,” he said, “That’s what everyone calls me.”
“And what false-name shall I bear, then?”
He chuckled quietly as he finally sat up. He raised his long arms in a stretch that exposed the bottom of his stomach and his V-line, and you glanced away until he returned his arms down to a cross in front of his chest. You took notice of his hair, which was awfully messy in the morning, and you thought he should get his hands on a bonnet to take care of it, but then you thought he probably shouldn’t. A silk pillow would’ve done him wonders, though.
“A nickname for Y/n,” said Theo, “How about Y/n/n?”
“I suppose that will do,” you said as nonchalantly as possible, but inside you were screaming with excitement. A nickname! You’d never had a nickname before.
“Oh, you suppose, do you?” he teased.
Your amused smile betrayed your insincere attempt at a pout, “Don’t make fun of me.”
“Don’t let anyone else call you Y/n/n, alright?” said Theo, and you crossed your brows in question, “I want it to be just an us-thing. They can call you your full name at most.”
He was extraordinarily bossy. But it was sweet. Heartwarming, even.
“Wait, but if everyone calls you Theo, I want something just for us, too!” You blushed at how overly familiar that sounded, but Theo’s rosy cheeks filled you with conviction. “How about Teddy?”
Giddily, he smiled at you, “Say it to me in a sentence.”
You frowned, but obeyed, “I like being your friend, Teddy. — How was that?” He nodded happily, “You say one for mine, now.”
He thought for a moment, trying to decide on a sentence to say.
“Read my mind, Y/n/n.”
Always, he had to boss you around. But, again, you really didn’t care. It was just nice to have someone to boss you around. To think that only at the beginning of that week, you had no friends at all… Now you had so many, and all thanks to destiny. All thanks to your Teddy.
A breath, and then you forced your way into his mind. There was a picture there waiting for you, a memory from Monday. A memory of you, except, you seemed to glow. You’d seen yourself in a million mirrors and memories over the course of your life, but never had you looked so beautiful. And then, there were words.
“I’d like to go on a date with you, Y/n/n.”
Your eyes snapped open as you left his thoughts to belong to him alone.
“What?” You asked, your ears red.
“I think you’re absolutely brilliant, Y/n/n. Please, go on a date with me?” Theo smiled.
He inched closer until your noses touched and you could barely tell each others’ features apart. Each of you were just blurs of colour.
“I’d love to go on a date with you, Teddy.”
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littlexdeaths · 13 days
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eddie munson x shy fem reader
warnings: lots of cute first date jitters, reader is clumsy, also a lot more cheese 🧀 — take your lactaid besties.
part one | part three
a/n: i’m honestly blown away by all the sweet comments on that first little blurb. shy reader is 1000% me, so this is very near and dear to my heart. i hope y’all like this one just as much! also big kisses to my lovely angel @undead-supernova for looking this over for me <3
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“This looks stupid.”
You huff, glancing at your reflection before rushing back over to your closet for the 3rd time in a span of twenty minutes.
But Nancy grabs your wrist from before you can make it there, pulling you down onto the bed beside her.
“Everything you’ve tried on has been cute… I don’t see the problem here.”
You groan and flop back onto the mattress, covering your face with your hands.
“I wasn’t exactly trying to go for cute, Nance.”
Your words are muffled behind your palms, but she gets your message loud and clear.
“I know you want to impress him, but my best advice is to just be yourself… that’s why he asked you out in the first place, right?”
You sigh, uncovering your face to look up at her. She has a brow raised, and as much as you’d hate to admit it— you know she’s right.
“Do you always have to be right about everything?” you puff out a small laugh and she beams, nudging your knee with hers.
“Of course, I am the brains of this operation, remember?”
You roll your eyes fondly before returning to your feet, smoothing over the denim of your skirt when you meet your reflection once more.
“Oh god, what about make up?!”
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You only managed to change your shirt one last time before Nancy had to practically barricade your closet door shut with her body. Reminding you that, once again, you looked great.
It doesn’t help much to soothe that little voice in the back of your head that disagrees— but the rumble of an engine and a blaring guitar riff distracts from those thoughts momentarily as the panic finally starts to set in.
“Shit, shit, shit! He’s here already?” you squeak, glancing over at your beside clock.
6:45 pm.
He was 15 minutes early.
“He’s early… color me impressed.” She grins before peeking out your curtains.
“I’m… I’m not ready, Nance.”
Your heart is about to pound out of your chest and your palms are beginning to sweat. She steps away from the window to put her hands on your shoulders, face full of determination.
“Just breathe, okay? I’ll go down and let him in, you just take a minute and come down when you’re ready.”
You nod dumbly, eyes widening further when the doorbell rings.
Eddie’s here… actually standing on your front porch. Bouquet of flowers grasped tightly in his own sweaty palms.
“Thanks, Nance.”
She just gives you a reassuring smile before starting down the stairs and opening the front door. To say Eddie is surprised when Nancy Wheeler appears at your front door instead of you is an understatement.
“Uh… please don’t tell me I’ve got the wrong address,” he steps back to take a look at the number on the house again.
“No, you’re at the right place. She’s just finishing getting ready, come on in.”
Nancy can see the way his shoulders sag in relief before he steps past the threshold. Dark eyes wandering around the interior of your entry way in utter curiosity. Pictures of you and your parents line the walls, but one in particular catches his attention.
You’re smiling up at the camera, eyes scrunched closed behind the round frame of your glasses— with your two front teeth missing.
The sight has him grinning despite himself, already catching more of a glimpse of the girl that’s been on his mind for the better part of that year.
“So… where are you taking her?” Nancy asks casually, leaning against the doorframe of your kitchen.
Eddie turns then, still clutching the flowers tightly in his fist.
“The Palace… and then Benny’s. But don’t worry, I’ll have her back before 11 pm. Scout’s honor.” He grins, raising his other hand in a mock salute.
You can hear their voices floating up the stairs, which only seems to worsen the butterflies fluttering around in your stomach. You take one last look in the mirror to straighten your top and make sure your eyeliner wasn’t smudged before you turn the knob and make your way down the hall.
The creak of the floorboards alerts them both to your presence when you slowly begin to descend the stairs. Your hand grips the railing tightly, eyes finally lifting once you reach the landing.
“Wow,” he whispers in dumbstruck awe.
You can feel your skin warm under the intensity of his gaze, tucking your lower lip between your teeth to hide a grin.
But the sweet moment is quickly squashed when your foot catches on the edge of the step, and you go tumbling forward. Eddie drops the flowers in his haste before closing that short distance between you to catch you in his arms. Your bodies collide, much like what happened earlier in the cafeteria.
Only this time he doesn’t let you go right away.
“Steady now,” he chuckles, and your eyes can’t help but drift lower to stare at his lips. “You okay?”
You nod, not fully trusting your voice when he’s so close like this, you swear he must be able to hear how fast your heart is fluttering beneath your ribs.
“Oh goddammit, the flowers.” Eddie groans, making sure you’ve got your footing before he bends down to pick up the crumpled bouquet.
“Uh, I promise they weren’t like this when I got here...”
He hands them out to you with a sheepish grin, the apples of his cheeks now flushed a soft shade of pink. And from this close proximity you can see the faint freckles dotted along the bridge of his nose.
Man, he sure is pretty…
“They’re beautiful,” you smile, finally finding your voice. “Thank you.”
“… well, you two should probably get going, right?”
You had almost forgotten Nancy was even there.
“Oh what about—” you gesture to the bouquet in your hands, but she quickly cuts you off.
“I’ll put those in some water and lock up for you, sound good?”
You don’t have much time for protest when she carefully takes the flowers from your grasp and nudges you right into Eddie’s chest. You apologize between small giggles when he steadies you again, and Nancy disappears into the kitchen.
His eyes are almost sparkling in childlike delight at the sound of your laughter, and it’s something he’d like to continue hearing for a long time. Eddie guides you both toward the front door. His rings clink against the knob when he swings it open, taking a slight bow before motioning you forward.
“Your chariot awaits, mi’ lady.”
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The Palace is packed by the time you arrive, but for a Friday night in Hawkin’s— that’s no surprise.
Young teens dart between the different games with renewed excitement while Keith watches on with a bored expression. Eddie’s hand is held loosely in your own, fingers intertwined while you decide what to play first.
You both agree on air hockey, allowing him to tug you toward the table with a newfound pep in his step. He hands you the blue paddle, teasing telling you that red is always his color before he crouches down to slip two coins in the slot.
“Prepare to be demolished, sweetheart,” he grins cheekily.
Your stomach flips at those seemingly innocent words, and Eddie silently pats himself on the back for how flustered he’s already made you. That’s not something he’s used to, making a pretty girl fumble over her words. But it’s something he’s decided he wants to see a lot more of tonight.
Eddie ends up winning two rounds of air hockey, but his victories were entirely due to the fact that you were so distracted. Poised across from him, you spent more time admiring the way his tongue poked out from between his lips in concentration— or when he had to pull his wild hair back into a bun when it kept flying into his face.
Not that you would ever mention that little fact to him.
“What’s next?” you ask, unable to hide your glee when he takes your hand without hesitation this time.
“Have you tried Dragon’s Lair?”
He nods his head over to the game that was just recently abandoned in a fit of rage by short boy with dark hair. If you were being honest, skee ball and air hockey were more your speed when it came to arcade games. But the look of absolute delight on his face has you willing to try regardless.
And just as you suspected, you’re terrible at it.
You’re barely able to get past that first level without dying repeatedly but Eddie continues to give you an encouraging smile while he leans against the machine. He adores the way your lips are pouted in a slight frown when the dragon engulfs the knight in flames again.
“Here,” he mumbles, sliding in behind you. “Let me help.”
His arms cage you in against the machine, and you can feel the heat from his chest seeping through the thin cotton of your blouse. Ringed fingers gently hover over where yours are stationed on the controls, and in your nervous state you don’t notice the way his fingers tremble slightly.
Eddie guides your hands with ease, all but playing the game for you at this point. But your focus is no longer on the dragons and knights. They instead settle on his hands, and how they completely engulf yours in size. And the way his chain bracelet rattles against your skin with each flick of his wrist on the joystick.
They continue to travel a little higher, noticing how the muscles in his forearms contract each time he pushes that red button in rapid succession. It has your mind wandering to places that it definitely shouldn’t be…
Like how his hands would feel gripping your hips…
Stop that.
When you take a shuddering breath, you get another whiff of his spicy cologne when he leans his head forward. The faint hint of tobacco and mint still lingers on his lips when he blows a breath out in frustration when he finally looses that round.
The words GAME OVER flash across the screen in brightly colored letters, and you feel a little disappointed when he begins to remove himself from you. But you’re suddenly feeling a little bold, gently turning to grab his hand before looking up at him.
“Show me again?” you mumble, chewing nervously on your lower lip.
Eddie grins down at you, eyes flicking down to your mouth for a fleeting moment. But his next move has your brain about to melt out of your ears.
He takes your lower lip between his thumb and forefinger, carefully removing it from between your teeth. He allows the pad of his thumb to graze over your lip while the other slips around your waist. Eddie guides you back around by your hips, quickly resuming his position behind you.
“Sure thing, sweetheart.”
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