#We'll return to chapter 24 next time

[ladyloveandjustice]

Watch her just give Rina some gum or something..

Wait, she has access to the book from inside the book? That’s convenient and extremely strange. Did her cell phone just get isekai’d with her and she’s able to see everything she downloaded on it? Very weird. I must have missed that. It seems like this would have been engineered by someone to mislead her.

I’d also be guessing maybe Rina is the one who actually has feelings and the title is a misdirect, but the text she’s reading clearly indicates it is indeed Jin, someone we haven’t met yet. But I bet we’ll meet her soon!

[writeforfandoms]

Waking Lions 24

Find the series masterlist

Here we are at the second to last chapter! Next chapter is the last one. Eek!

An important conversation is had, and you begin to navigate your new normal.

Warnings: Swearing, emotions, emotional talks, offscreen death.

Word count: 1.2k

“Ace,” John answered just after the second ring. 

“John,” you greeted. You swallowed, suddenly uncertain how to proceed now that you had him on the phone. “How is clean up going?” 

John huffed, a soft mostly amused sound. “As well as can be expected,” he murmured. “How are you?”

You paused to consider the question. Normally you'd deflect, joke, answer in riddles. But… Well. You didn't need to anymore. Not with John, at least. “Working through things,” you admitted, soft and slow. 

He hummed. “Suppose we have some things to talk about.”

“We do.” You didn't particularly want to. In fact, you'd much rather run. It was easier to run. You didn't have to deal with any of these complex things. But it also isolated you.

And for once, you'd rather not be isolated. You didn't want to run from John, not really. 

Silence held between the two of you for a few long moments, stilted and awkward, as things hadn't been before. You kind of hated it. 

“I don't like that he's still alive.” That hadn't been where you were going to start. Dammit. 

John breathed out slowly, crackling down the line. “I understand that,” he said, speaking slowly, weighing his words. “But he has more to tell us still.” 

You clenched your jaw, pushing down the irrational anger. “I know,” you managed. “I know you need him for evidence. But I can't relax until he's dead.” 

John was silent for long enough that you thought about checking if he was still there. “Understood,” he grunted finally.

Your heart leapt. You knew that tone. That was the tone of a man willing to do whatever it took to fulfill his mission. Was he saying…? You swallowed. You couldn't bring yourself to ask. “So, where does this leave us?”

“Was going to ask you that, love.” John huffed out a short breath, a little rasp over the line making you think he was rubbing his beard. 

You sighed softly. “Not sure,” you admitted. “How much longer are you here?”

“We leave tomorrow night.”

“Oh.” Your heart ached for reasons you didn't want to examine just yet. “No rest for the weary, hm?”

“Or the wicked.” He chuckled with black humor. 

“Well.” You breathed in slowly. “Suppose you're not allowed to tell me where you're going?”

“Nowhere you should be,” he said sharply. You could all but see the look he'd aim at you. 

Your lips quirked. “Alright, then, don't tell me this time.” You paused, considering. This was well outside the rules, but, well. You'd already broken so many rules for him, for Kate. The rules didn't matter anymore. “Tell me, when you can.” 

By the sudden, absolute silence on his end, you knew he caught the significance of your words. “I will,” he agreed in a low rasp. “Not staying with Kate?”

“I will, for a while,” you murmured, tipping your head back to look up at the ceiling. “But I'm sure my feet will start itching again soon.” 

“Think they ever won't?” The question was light, teasing. But you could hear the genuine inquiry beneath. 

“That depends.” You swallowed. 

“On?”

“How long Gray lives.” You breathed in deep for courage. “And if someone wanted me to stay.” 

Price was silent again for a few moments. When he did answer you, his voice was rough. “Well, then. We'll see what happens, eh?” 

“We will.” You smiled, choosing to be hopeful that he'd said “we”, not just you. “Do you need to go?”

“Not yet,” he said quickly, and you smiled at the ceiling. “Tell me what you've been doing.”

So you did. Not that you'd done much. He seemed amused and understanding at how much you'd slept, commenting only that sleep was good for you. In return, he gave you the edited version of catching up with his team after they'd all gotten back from their assignments. He wouldn't give you any details, and you didn't push for any. 

It was a fragile sort of peace, talking around some things, but it worked. The two of you made it work. 

It gave you hope, for later. Down the road. Once you were less of a mess.

When the two of you finally hung up, it was late. Late enough that you felt bad for keeping him. But you knew he wouldn't accept an apology, wouldn't want to hear it. 

But you were surprised to find a text from Gaz when you woke. 

You're a bloody miracle worker. 

You laughed to yourself, shaking your head. I didn't do much.

Gaz replied immediately. Either he was bored or not busy. Don't care what you did, keep it up. He's almost mellow today.

You snorted but didn't reply to him. You didn't need to. 

Instead, you spent the day doing housework and debating what you wanted to do, long term. Not your most productive day. Oh well. Not every day could be productive. Or even good. 

You did check with Kate about when the team was leaving. You sent John a text shortly before they were due to leave. 

Safe journeys, John. I'll see you soon.

You stayed with Kate another week and a half before the urge to go grew too strong. But you didn't run. You told her where you were going, and left in the morning. 

You weren't going anywhere for work, not yet. You didn't need to work just yet. Instead, you traveled just to wander. To find some new favorite restaurants. Moving had always helped you decide what to do, and this time was no different. 

You also kept up with texting John. He didn't respond right away, sometimes not for days. But he always responded. 

It was… weird. But nice. 

Two weeks into your leisurely travel, you finally started to consider work again. You could probably reconnect with enough contacts to start over, or switch entirely to giving information to Kate. Or you could try something else, maybe. 

But you did like the freedom afforded you with travel and gathering information. 

Hm. Something to think further about, certainly. You did have some options. 

You'd just settled back in your hotel for the night when your phone rang. Kate. That was surprising. 

“I don't have bail money,” you answered in lieu of a proper greeting. 

But Kate apparently wasn't in the mood for your jokes. “Sit down,” she said firmly. “Now.” 

You sat on the bed, swallowing hard. “What happened?” Dread spread icy limbs through your chest. 

“Gray's dead.”

The world swayed even as your heart stopped. “What?” You didn't recognize the tiny wheeze as your own voice. 

“He was found dead this morning. Single gunshot wound to the head. No security footage,” Kate told you, matter of fact and as close to inflectionless as you'd ever heard her. 

You breathed in deep as your heart restarted, pounding along. “You're absolutely sure.”

“Yes.” Kate sounded grimly satisfied when she said, “Gray is dead.” 

You sat there for moments that stretched an eternity, absolutely no thoughts in your head. Gray was dead. He was finally dead.

Wait.

“Single gunshot wound?” You confirmed, the world snapping back into hard focus. “No footage at all?”

“Correct.” 

“I need to go.” You hung up, scrambling off the bed to start throwing your things back in your bags. You spared one minute to send off a text, and then hailed a cab to the nearest airport. 

You had a plane to catch.

[nonbinaryspy]

Meta: Elincia's Trolley Problems

Elincia's arc comes into sharpest relief when you consider both PoR and RD together. From living a sheltered life as a secret princess, to watching her parents get killed as her country is invaded, to eventually rising to the challenge of her unexpected role as queen, she has to deal with important decisions at every turn. Every action she takes is out of love for Crimea's people and a desire to secure them safe and happy lives. But what happens when she has to choose between the life of a loved one and the future of the overall populace? Both PoR and RD test this with narrative beats that form a perfect mirror, ultimately reflecting Elincia's development.

Path of Radiance

Throughout PoR, Elincia has been separated from her usual support network, particularly her retainers. After returning to Crimea, she finally finds them—however, in chapter 24, before she is able to reunite with Geoffrey, he is left behind to fend off Daein troupes so that Elincia can escape. Elincia is naturally horrified.

Bastian: Geoffrey's acting as a decoy. You must continue on this road to the southwest. Lucia: So the enemy's found us, eh? Lucia: Nothing to do about it but change course. I'll lead you to another hiding place. Elincia: Wh-what are you saying, Lucia? We must help Geoffrey! Bastian? Lucia: Luck was not with us, Princess. We have no choice. We'll have to abandon our companions in Castle Delbray. Elincia: No!! We will not!! Geoffrey and the others have survived so much already... I will not abandon them! Lucia: Princess, please understand. If we could do so without danger to you, we would gladly risk our lives to go back. Elincia: We cannot do this! Please, Lucia! We must go to the castle! ...Bastian! You must not do this thing! Bastian: Geoffrey is a knight. In the name of our friend's honor, Princess, you must escape. Elincia: No... No! They've survived this long! They're alive! NO!!!

When Ike gives her the chance to instead save Geoffrey, she affirms that this is what she wants.

Elincia: Yes. I don't want... I don't want anyone else to be sacrificed.

Lucia and Bastian respect her wishes and agree to help Geoffrey, at which point she is able to get her feelings across.

Elincia: Because the two of you think to put me above all else, you say you will sacrifice your lives for me. Yet... Even if I'm able to borrow of Ike's strength and win back Crimea... If the cost of that victory is the lives of the two of you, I shall never smile again. And joy? Never again would that emotion fill my heart...

Elincia is a leader, but she's also a person—one who never asked for this role. Until recently, she has not had to make decisions that would affect the future of a whole country, as opposed to only living within her personal sphere. In fact, the main political decision made re: her life—the decision to keep her birth secret—was made for her. She has already lost her parents and, as far as she knows, her beloved uncle.

Since then, her choices have all been for the sake of Crimea. In reality, she has had little choice in how to go about that goal, considering she has been fleeing for her life while at the whims of Begnion politics. Being able to return to Crimea and reunite with her retainers is the first time she has been running toward, rather than away, from something, and still part of that goal is being held from her reach. Nothing will stop her from working hard for Crimea, but individual losses will still give her permanent grief. So here, she finally takes a stand against the choices other people try to make for her, and insists on protecting her loved ones and regaining some of what she lost.

What happens next depends on the player, but considering her retainers are alive in RD, the duology's canon here is that they all survive this fight. Due to Elincia getting her feelings across, her loved ones are saved, and the campaign continues.

After this experience, the cost of individual lives in war is hammered home, and Elincia decides it's not enough to order others to keep her retainers safe. Regaining her inherited pegasus and sword, she takes to the field despite the mixed feelings of her retainers.

Elincia: Even though I'm dressed like this, I have no experience, and do not expect to fight as well as the rest of you. But…this constant waiting behind and doing nothing…it sets my heart beating with such unease I fear it may burst. Even if I cannot fight, I could use a staff to heal the wounded. If I could save just one soldier, it would mean so much to me.

This quote shows her resolve and compassion, but it also shows that she still lacks experience and confidence, especially when it comes to conflict. Despite being trained in swordplay, she instead emphasizes her ability to heal, and sets a fairly low bar for what her contribution will mean. Although, given that this plot demonstrates the importance of saving an individual life, maybe I shouldn't call it a low bar. Either way, at this point, there is still plenty of room for her to grow and change, and RD will challenge her to due so.

Radiant Dawn

Part two of Radiant Dawn focuses on Ludveck attempting to usurp Elincia's throne by stirring up reactionary attitudes toward her policies, specifically with regards to her alliance with Gallia, to threaten civil war and pressure her into giving up her throne. Because she fears the conflict that could come out of taking direct action against a noble, and because his followers are also citizens of Crimea for whom she feels responsible, she approaches the situation carefully. Ludveck takes advantage of this hesitance to eventually kidnap Lucia.

Once again, one of the Delbray siblings is in peril, and this time, as Crimea's queen, Elincia does not need to convince anyone to save her. Instead, she takes to the field herself. As with PoR, she had not immediately done so—in this case, because of the delicacy the situation called for. But with Lucia's life at risk and Ludveck's forces at Elincia's door, she decides the time for delicacy is past.

Elincia: “Lucia… Lucia, I’m sorry. Somehow, I promise you… I will save you!” ... Elincia: “…Very well. I must prepare as well. I had hoped this day would never come… Amiti, the treasured blade of House Crimea, will awaken from its long slumber.”

Unlike in PoR, rather than focusing on her healing ability, she mentions Amiti. She no longer needs to make disclaimers or doubt the importance of her role commanding the field. The wording of "I had hoped this day would never come" and "awaken from its long slumber" emphasize that she has already been through the horrors of war once, and never wanted to again. She despises violence, but she is resigned to doing what she must.

Despite holding out against Ludveck's forces and throwing him in the dungeon, she is not able to do anything about his trump card. With Lucia as hostage, he tries to use her life as a bargaining chip for his release, as well as the country. After the incident in PoR, where her retainers saw their own lives as disposable, she convinced them to realize how valuable they were to her. So with the Delbray siblings' situations reversed, Geoffrey now asks Elincia to save Lucia.

Geoffrey: “…Your Majesty, you can’t… You have to let me do something about this.” Elincia: “…” Geoffrey: “Lucia would willingly die fighting for her country, I know… But you have to help her, Elincia. If you were in her position, she would surely do the same. Please, just give the word.”

Again, Elincia is at the point where she is taking action herself instead of entreating others. Rather than order him to do anything, Elincia visits Ludveck in what is one of the most defining scenes of her arc. The non-extended version is below as I think it gets the point across quite well, but there are more dialogue beats in the extended version.

Ludveck: “Queen Elincia, you’re so naive. Cold and callous decisions are sometimes required of a nation’s ruler. …I was testing you. We all wanted to know if our queen would have the power to stop a civil war.” Ludveck: “But, no, you were too hesitant and too concerned about harming the people… Now look what has happened. The rule of Crimea cannot be kept in your hands! Please, Your Majesty! You must abdicate and cede the crown to me!” Ludveck: “And considering Lady Lucia’s life is on the line, you haven’t much choice. Now, let’s have you free me from this prison cell, and then we can discuss any further details…” Elincia: “I don’t think so.” Ludveck: “What?! Are you truly willing to sacrifice Lady Lucia?!” Elincia: “…Lord Ludveck, all your dissatisfaction and misgivings about me are well founded. However, do you realize how many lives you’ve simply thrown away?! Strength without compassion does not a ruler make. You care nothing for the people, sir. You cloak your desire to rule with pretty speeches, but it is petty avarice nonetheless!” Ludveck: “…So this is how it shall be? Very well… But Lady Lucia cannot be spared without my order.” Elincia: “Allowing you to plant the seeds of rebellion and play havoc with the lives of my people is a failure for which I must answer. But I will see Crimea through this trial. I will give my people the future they deserve, no matter the cost.”

Ludveck patronizes Elincia for her compassion while pretending he has the citizens' best interests at heart, but Elincia doesn't bow to his demands. She maintains her compassion along with her resolve. However, no matter how caring someone is, the fact of the matter is that decisions that help even a great deal of people still come with consequences. Elincia realizes this, and is prepared to make that sacrifice while taking responsibility—even though, as she said in PoR, she "shall never smile again."

In the beginning of PoR, Elincia lost almost everything in one fell swoop. When she was finally reunited with her retainers, the thought of sacrificing even one of them was unbearable, even if it could potentially have derailed her goal to retake her country from an invading tyrant. Now, though, she is in a position of greater power, and she is fully aware of the responsibility that comes with it. Compared to PoR, where she was so often at the mercy of others, the only thing tying her hands now is the threat to Lucia. Of course, Lucia is immensely important to her, but after spending three years working to rebuild Crimea, nothing can convince her to let it again fall to ruin under another power-hungry leader.

Thankfully, Lucia's life and Elincia's smiles are saved, thanks to Bastian secretly calling in the Greil Mercenaries. Despite her resolve, Elincia's conflicting priorities are still apparent, as in the extended version (translation on Serenes Forest provided below) she expresses wonder at her decision. As for her retainers, though their feelings on how she should handle such situations have shifted over time, they don't begrudge her decision.

Elincia: “…When Lucia was captured… It was as if I lost my other half. Even now, seeing her by my side, I feel so strange… Wondering how, at that time, I could make the decision to abandon her…” Lucia: “Lady Elincia…” Elincia: “Still… If the same scenario occurred… I believe I would make the same decision. Lucia’s life is important, but it’s not on the same scale as protecting the country. As the Queen of Crimea, I must accomplish my duty to the country foremost.” Lucia: “Of course. Seeing Lady Elincia being able to make this decision, it truly makes me happy. As if I would hate you.” Geoffrey: “My thoughts exactly.” Elincia: “Lucia, Geoffrey… I value your lives more than even my own. But it’s my duty to protect this country, even if that means losing you. I’ve learned a lot from all of this. I hope to keep them out of harm’s way, and I’ll never make the same mistakes again.”

By the end of this section, the bulk of Elincia's arc is complete. She has decided what matters to her and what she will do as queen when put into high-pressure situations. She resolves the situation by deciding to be openly harsh in punishing Ludveck's followers despite the fact that it will gain ire toward her, as refusing to do so before gave him the opening he needed. She has decided to be uncompromising in the face of reactionary politics. Not everyone in Crimea will agree with her decisions, but those closest to her will never waver in their loyalty, to the extent that they are both willing to live and die for her. It's no wonder that, as her epilogue says, "Her reign was remembered as a golden age."

Conclusion

Because I touched on the topic of Elincia's agency and how she maneuvers within the limits of it, I want to give a brief shout-out to her actions in part three. She is Gallia's ally and does not want any more bloodshed in her lands. However, due to Begnion exercising its imperial power, she cannot fully stop its army from entering her lands in pursuit of the laguz alliance. The action she ultimately takes, dropping her weapon in between the opposing armies and essentially daring them to murder a queen of a country with whom they're both allied, all without betraying her own nonviolent ideals, is an unparalleled power move.

Getting back to Elincia's trolley problems, what I find interesting is that though Elincia's decisions are different in PoR and RD, neither game condemns her for her choices. She cares for both the mass of strangers that comprise her kingdom and the loved ones who she's spent her life beside. Her situation in each game is different, so she handles each situation differently in ways that make sense given her roles, pressures, and motivations.

FE in general, and Tellius in particular, asks the characters and players to care about the fates of individual lives as well as whole worlds. Both PoR and RD present the question of what someone would or should do when these personal and political goals conflict, without giving one black-and-white answer. Elincia's arc is just one impactful example of this.

As for me, I'm not gonna lie—though Elincia doesn't have the option to reset the game whenever someone dies, I probably always will.

[canirove]

In The Name of Love | Chapter 30

Previous chapter | Next chapter

Masterlist

"And on our last day in Ibiza… we meet Pedri! He was super nice, asking us if we liked the photos after we took them and if we wanted to repeat them. Such a sweetheart… And he was with his girlfriend. She also was super nice and the one who took the group photo. She asked us to say Pepi instead of cheese and that's why we are laughing. She made the photo look perfect and one of my favourites from this trip. After that we saw them again outside a bar and you should have seen the way Pedri was looking at her and her smile. So cute! They are couple goals. See, just good comments. And we are couple goals, Val" Pedri says after reading the caption one of the girls we met yesterday wrote on Instagram. 

We've been in Ibiza for a week already, and so far everything has been going smoothly and I've kept my promise of enjoying my holidays and my boyfriend. We've gone out for dates or walks just the two of us, to the beach with Ferran and Eric, to some parties… And when people have stopped him or the boys to take a photo, everyone has been lovely both offline and online. 

"Yeah, sure" I snort.

"We are. Aren't we, Eric?"

"Uh?"

"Val and I. Aren't we couple goals?"

"What you are is extra cheesy lately. What's gotten into you?" he says.

"Jealous?" Pedri smirks.

"The only thing I'm jealous of is the shirt you wore the other day for dinner. Can I borrow it tonight?"

"Why? Are you meeting with someone?"

"We are going to Ushuaia, remember?" Eric says.

"Are you meeting with someone there?"

"Can I borrow the shirt or not?"

"Don't change the topic, Eric. You are the only one who is single, you know? I have Val, Ferran has his ginger girl, Gavi is seeing someone new too…"

"Pedri, shut up" I say.

"What?"

"Just shut up, those comments aren't funny. They actually are very annoying and can be very hurtful, I know it from experience. And yes, you can borrow his shirt. It's on our room's closet."

"Thank you, Val" Eric smiles.

"I was a prick, wasn't I?" Pedri says when we are alone again.

"Yes, you were."

"I'm sorry."

"You should be apologizing to Eric, not me."

"I will, I promise. And since he talked about tonight… Are you ready to sing your lungs out like the last time?"

"Is Martin going to dedicate me another song?" I ask.

"Maybe" he shrugs. "Or maybe he'll ask you to go on stage with him."

"Pedro!"

"Ouch!" he complains. "I was just joking, there is no need to hit me like that."

"Your jokes suck today, you deserve it."

"And you deserve this."

"Pedri!" I laugh when he starts tickling me.

"You asked for it when you hit me, Val."

"Pedri, stop. Please!"

"Saying that won't help you."

"Pedri… Pedri!" I laugh again when he pushes me on the sofa until I'm laying on my back, he on top of me. "Stop!"

"You really hurt me. I think it is gonna bruise."

"Aww, poor Pepi…" 

"Don't tease me, Val."

"Or what, uh? More tickling?"

"Maybe" he says, slowly moving his hands under my t-shirt. "I may not touch you for the rest of our holidays here in Ibiza."

"Ha! You'll be all over me tonight."

"No, I won't."

"Yes, you will, Pedro. You'll see."

"I won't" he repeats, leaning forward until our noses are touching.

"Yes, you…"

"Val, do you… oh, c'mon" Eric says, rolling his eyes. "If you want to have sex go to your room, you aren't alone!"

"We weren't going to do anything. In fact, we won't do anything for the rest of the trip" Pedri says.

"Yeah, sure" Eric snorts. "You will be all over Val tonight, you can't help yourself."

"See?" I say.

"I won't" he insists.

"Ok, then. 24 hours. If you don't manage to go that long without making out with Val or touching her in a sexual way, I'm keeping your shirt."

"And if I manage to do it? What do I get in return?"

"You won't, Pedri" Eric laughs. "But if that's the case, we'll think of something. Deal?" he says, offering him his hand.

"Deal" he says, shaking it. 

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

"Val… Stop doing that."

"Doing what?" I ask.

"That."

"I'm just dancing."

"And killing me. Can't you feel it?"

"I actually can, yes" I laugh.

"Then please stop" Pedri says, kissing my neck.

"You are the one who has to stop, we are somewhere public."

"I can't, you look fucking hot tonight. Why did you have to wear this dress? And with your hair up?"

"I know it is one of your favourites" I smile.

"It is. God knows it is" he says as the hand he has on my leg moves up a bit more.

"Pedri…"

"What?" he says against my skin, making me feel goosebumps down my spine.

"Behave yourself."

"I can't."

"Well, you must. Because I'm here to enjoy the full show, not just half of it."

"And I want to enjoy all of you" he says, the arm around my waist tightening.

"Once it ends we can go home if that's what you want. But now you have to behave."

"Urgh" he groans, resting his forehead on my shoulder. "You are the worst, Val. And you've made me lose one of my favourite shirts."

"Oh, poor Pepi" I tease him.

"Rude."

"Pedri!" I yelp when he bites my shoulder.

"You deserve it" he says in my ear. "Gonna go get myself a drink."

"Yeah, go cool down" I laugh.

"I'll be watching you, tho."

"Like a creep?"

"Like the boyfriend who is taking notes of all the things he's gonna do to his girlfriend once she stops torturing him with her dancing and they are home alone."

"Sure" I laugh again. But like has happened it the past, it sounds like a nervous laugh, because he is looking at me in that way that tells me that he isn't joking. 

"Enjoy the rest of the show. Then it'll be my turn to enjoy you" he smirks before walking away, leaving me trying to compose myself and focus on the music and not on what will be happening when it ends.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

"Got to meet these cracks last night in Ushuaia. Top lads! And thank you to Pedri's girlfriend for taking the photo of all of us together. She is hot as hell, no wonder my boy couldn't keep his hands to himself. Told you you looked hot as hell, Val. He's added three fire emojis. Three!" Pedri says after reading another Instagram post, this one from a guy we met last night and who took a photo with him, Eric and Ferran. 

"It was just a dress."

"But it is the dress."

"And speaking of clothes… How are you  feeling about Eric owning your favourite shirt? Still gutted?"

"Yeah. But mainly because I loved seeing you wearing it."

"We can always buy another one."

"Nah, it's ok. You actually look better like this. Naked."

"Pedri…" I say as he moves to be on top of me and starts kissing my neck.

"I can't keep my hands to myself, Val. I couldn't last night, and I can't right now. You are three fire emojis hot."

"You have loved that, haven't you?" I laugh.

"I have" he says against my skin, the feeling making me gasp. "But there is something that I love a lot more."

"Enlighten me."

"You" he smiles before kissing me.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

"I can't even recognize myself."

"Yeah, we both look so weird… But I guess that happens when they take the photos from so far away" Pedri shrugs.

Because the paparazzis had finally caught us. 

It had been on our last day in Ibiza, when we had gone out on a boat with Ferran, Eric and Gavi, who had joined us for a few days.

"How do you think they found us?" I ask, still looking at the magazine in my hands. 

"Ibiza isn't that big and they know many footballers go there for their holidays. They just have to wait around the most exclusive and touristic places, and sooner or later someone will show up."

"Told you you guys are too predictable. It's like you all share the same brain cell" I tease him.

"We are predictable, yes" he chuckles. "Are you ok, tho? About the photos."

"I mean… It isn't ideal, but yeah."

"Good" Pedri smiles. "Should we buy the magazine?"

"What?" 

"We can keep it and share it one day with our grandchildren, telling them: look, this is the first time we were in a magazine." 

"Ok" I chuckle. 

"And we can do the sudoku and the crossword together on the plane."

"Good idea. So much thinking with your dick instead of your brain isn't good. I don't want you to turn into a Jack Grealish."

"Rude" he says, sticking out his tongue. "But I will never turn into someone like that because, unlike him, I know what an encyclopedia is and I have actually used it. And the paper version, something many people my age can't say."

"Oh, impressive" I laugh.

"Also, have you seen my legs?"

"Your thigh is as big as his calf, yes" I laugh again. 

"Exactly. So I will never be like him."

"Good" I smile. "Shall we pay for this, then?"

"Let's go. But we'll need to buy some pens too, one for each. Red and blue?" Pedri says with a teasing smile.

"Fine" I sigh. 

"You are the best, Val" he says, kissing my cheek and making me giggle like an idiot. 

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

"Pedri, can you please slow down?"

"No."

"You are gonna end up with a horrible stomach ache if you keep eating that fast. Or worse, you may choke."

"I won't choke. Relax, Val" he says. 

"I'm not so sure of that…"

"I won't. But ugh, I just can't help myself. I haven't eaten this in so long, and it is so freaking good" he says, giving his food another huge bite. 

"You are such a kid" I laugh.

"Yef yu lof me."

"What?"

"Yet you love me."

"Sadly I do, yes."

"Fuck."

"Please tell me you aren't choking."

"Worse" he says, cleaning his face and getting up.

"Pedri, where are you going?"

"To have a word with that guy."

"What?" I say, turning to look at the person he is walking towards. "You gotta be kidding me." 

A paparazzi. How did he find us in Tenerife? Did someone tip him off?

"What did you tell him?" I ask Pedri when he comes back to the table.

"That he can take all the photos he wants now, but that he better not follow us back home or I will be calling the police."

"Will they be able to do something, tho?"

"I don't know. But it seemed to scare him enough."

"Hey, Pedri. Are you ok?" I ask, reaching for his hand.

"Yeah, yeah. It's just that… This is my home, you know. Where I get to be just me, where I, we, should be safe. Having them here, following us around, feels…"

"Intrusive?"

"Yeah" he sighs. "I mean, it always does but… yeah. And now I've lost my appetite."

"Why don't we ask them to put all this for a take away and go back home?" I say, giving his hand a little squeeze.

"That sounds great. I could do with some cuddles right now…" he says, trying not to smile.

"Let's do it, then. We can cuddle and then go for a walk around town, maybe watch the sunset on the beach and have dinner there."

"So romantic, Val" he chuckles.

"I have my moments" I smile. "Shall we?"

"C'mon" he smiles back.

The next day our photos are all over the internet and printed in many magazines. And this time, you are able to properly see our faces.

"Is it too bad?" I ask Marina.

"I mean… There are more people talking about it than when the others came out. Most talk about Pedri's funny faces while he ate and the way your were looking and smiling at each other, that you looked really cute."

"But…"

"But now that your face is more visible there are more comments just about you."

"I see… Has anyone put two and two together and realized I'm Ferran's supposed girlfriend?" 

"Not yet, they are too busy looking for you on Instagram. But the moment someone does…" Marina says, biting her lip.

"It'll be the Hunger Games" I sigh.

"I don't know what that means, but yeah."

"You don't… what?" I laugh. 

"Sorry" she shrugs.

"Ok, remind me to make you watch the movies when I'm back in Barcelona. And read the books too." 

"Oh, am I gonna be part of your movie/book club? I'm sure Pedri is as clueless as I am."

"He probably is, yes" I chuckle.

"What am I now?" he says, sitting down next to me. "Hello, Marina."

"Hi" she smiles over the phone. "And you are clueless about the Hunger Games."

"Oh, I know what that is, I've watched the movies."

"Really?" both Marina and I say at the same time.

"Why so surprised?" he laughs.

"Well… you know" I shrug. "Anyway, I'm still making you watch them, Marina."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah… I have to go. I'll keep you updated about everything going on online, ok?"

"Thank you" I smile.

"Enjoy what is left of your holidays!" 

"You too" Pedri says before I hang up. "Is it too bad? Online, I mean."

"Not yet. Hopefully the preseason and you looking hot and sweaty will make them forget about me."

"Hot and sweaty, uh?" he says, putting his arm around my waist and pulling me closer to him. "Do you want to end like that too?"

"Now?"

"Why not? Marina told us to enjoy what is left of our holidays, and I can't think of a better way to do it."

"Pedri!" I giggle when he kisses my neck.

"I love you, Val" he says while leaving kisses all over my jaw, the hand that isn't on my waist moving up my thigh.

"I love you too" I reply, my brain starting to disconnect, letting me just feel and forget about everything going on outside. The crazy fans, the paparazzis, the hate…

Right now, it is just me and Pedri.

[totesnothere04]

Day to Day Norm Pt.1

Norm Spellman x Fem!Quaritch!Reader

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the fanart, screenshots, or gifs used with my stories.

Warnings: Idfk we'll find out when we get there lmao.

Pt.2

I plan in making these chapters shorter, because it's gonna be a longer series. Sorry yall I really don't wanna burn myself out again, especially since I've got multiple fandoms fighting over my last surviving brain cell. 😭

You paced into your dad's office and plopped into the chair across from his and threw your feet up on the table.

"You alright baby girl?" Your Dad asks as he looks up at you.

"I'm exhausted." You admit to him slightly defeated.

"I understand but think about it. After the newbies get their safety briefing you can go back to your bunk and go to sleep. It's only a few more hours sweet pea." Your Dad said with a soft smile reserved just for you.

"I've been awake for 24 hours because Wainfleet didn't want to do his part in getting everything ready for the newcomers." You complained and your dad's back went rigid.

"I gave him orders those were his to follow through with. I'm sorry, baby girl, but you're gonna have to wait until after. Then you can go to bed." Your Dad said then patted your foot. "Get your feet off my desk. How many times do I gotta tell ya?" He jokes as the both of you stand up to head to the mess hall. Zhang jogs up to the two of you and turns to face your Dad.

"I'm sorry sir, but Wainfleet is requesting (Y/n)'s help out on the tarmac." Zhang says and you groan. You turn and make your way to the airlock and grumble all the way out to where Lyle is.

"What the fuck do you want now Wainfleet?" You ask angrily.

"One of the patrols is late reporting in." Lyle tells you.

"Okay. You realize we're the same rank and you could be useful for once and check it out yourself." You say and he shakes his head.

"I've got to be at the safety briefing with the Colonel." He says and you scoff.

"Yeah so do I." You say agitated while you stomp back into the base but you make your way up the control center stairs instead. Once back inside you throw off the exo-pack and march over to the com systems. You find the bird thats late and call it.

"Chacon... Where in the name of everything holy are you?" You ask.

"Sorry, Corporal, Augustine and McCall got caught up collecting samples." She responds.

"Look, as much as I love those two you need to get your asses back asap. You're late and in doing so I'm late." You say as calmly as possible.

"Ma'am I can report them back in when they return." The woman you're bent over says.

"Alright. Thank you." You say and look at the name on her uniform.

"Chacon, Hayward is going to report you back in when you return. I gotta go." You say and don't even wait for a reply as you walk away. You enter the mess hall, clearly agitated but trying to stay calm. However, wheelchair man decided it would be a good idea to just stay in the middle of the walkway. You sigh quietly and step up onto the bench and then the table just to step down on the other side. Your dad lights up when he spots you.

"This is my righthand woman, Corporal Quaritch. You can't find me, find her. Except for the next 24 hours, she'll be asleep." You look at wheelchair man and realize you startled him, but can't bring yourself to care right now. You went to follow behind your dad but made eye contact with a new scientist. Your breath silently hitched and he blushed. You hardened the look on your face into a glare and moved on. You got up to the front and leaned against the window seal. The same scientist from before makes eye contact with you again, but this time you decide to play since you're no longer the center of attention. You wink at him and he blushes again.

'Oh yeah, definitely my type.' You think to yourself as you continue to look around the new people. Your dad wrapped things up and you made your leave. You decided to check up on Grace before you went to sleep since you were her usual off-base escort. When you got there she was still in her pod so you took to her desk and sat in her chair to wait. With the new guys in she would be exiting her pod any minute now. You pulled your cap over your eyes and threw your feet up on her desk. You dozed off in a matter of a few moments but were rudely woken by someone shoving your feet off their perch. You groaned as you sat up and allowed your cap to fall into your hands.

"Good to see you too, Grace." You said jokingly, but you were met with a very angry expression. "Did... Did I ruin some documents or... What did I do?" You asked her.

"You didn't do anything." She said exasperated. "Look. I need you to keep an eye on Sully."

"Who?" You asked in confusion.

"The guy in the wheelchair. He's one of my new avatar drivers." She says and you become more confused.

"But... That guy is definitely a jarhead." You say as you steal a glance at him.

"The other one is cute though." You sit back and Grace looks at you astounded.

"Someone gaining your attention? Unheard of." She says with a laugh.

"Yeah I know right? I don't know how he did it, but he's got my attention. 100%." You say as you steal another glance only to find him already looking at you. You wink at him again and he quickly looks away.

"Seems you've got his attention too." Grace says with a laugh.

"How long was I asleep?" You ask her.

"About an hour. I let you get a nap in before I sent you back to your room." Grace tells you and you lean your chin on your hand. "I went to have a chat with Slefridge. I'm not happy that we got this Sully. We need his brother. The PhD that trained for 3 years for this job."

"Well, why did he back out last minute? There might've been a good reason." You say and a tap on your shoulder makes you freeze. You slowly turn to look at the person behind you and find Sully and the cute guy.

"He died." Sully said and you cringed.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be rude." You said and he shook his head.

"You weren't. We were wondering if someone could show us to our bunks?" Sully asks and I stand up.

"Let me see your room numbers." You say holding out your hand and he hands it to you. "Heh, would ya look at that. You two are right down the hall from me. Come on. I'll see you tomorrow Grace. I look forward to seeing them link for the first time." She waves as she takes the seat you just vacated.

"I wanted to say thanks for not treating me differently just because I'm paralyzed." Sully says and you huff out of your nose.

"My dad was a marine, but according to him, once a marine always a marine. Oorah or whatever." You say and he chuckles.

"Never went into the military?" He asks with a chuckle.

"Nope. Dad wanted me to get my GED at 16 so I could ship out here." You tell him and he looks at you confused.

"If he wasn't watching over you, then who was?" He asks and you scoffed.

"My mother... But I prefer to call that woman my surrogate. She never really learned that once you're a parent you focus on your child's well-being. Instead, she collected the child support my Dad was sending and spent it on her stuff. The RDA was nice enough to allow me to start working for them early. Course back then it was simple tasks. Train, learn, and run things back and forth for Selfridge. Guy took a liking to me and started helping me further my "career"." You tell them then blinked. "Woah. Sorry man didn't mean to info dump."

"It's all good. You seem cool to hangout around." Sully says.

"You too Sully." You say and he laughs.

"You can call me Jake. This is Norm." He introduces cute guy.

"So that's your name. Yeah, you caught my attention earlier." You say without thought of making him feel awkward.

"R-really?" He asks.

"Oh yeah. I like men with a brain." You say as you turn the corner and see Lyle standing at your door down the hall.

"C'mon (Y/n) I know you're in there. Stop ignoring me." He calls and you cough. He turns to look at you then scratches his neck. "Hey (Y/n). What, uh, what are you up to?"

"Showing Jake and Norm to their bunk so I can go to sleep." You say with an edge and he groans.

"(Y/n)-" Lyle starts but you roll your eyes.

"Didn't my Dad give you orders to follow through with? I think you should go do that." You say and he walks away. Once he's out of earshot you turn to the two guys. "That guy? Has one brain cell and it's currently fighting a losing war to steroids." You joke and Jake busts out laughing with Norm chuckling quietly. "This is you guys. If you need anything I'm right down there."

"So we gathered." Jake jokes and you walk away chuckling.

"I'm gonna get some rack. I suggest you do that too." You tell them and then disappear into your room. You quickly shower and dress for sleep and lay down. You fall asleep as soon as your head hits the pillow.

The next day you're happily making your way to the link room and find Max and Grace.

"Hey, you got here just in time. They just went in and it seems lover boy has taken to his avatar well." Grace says. "You want to join me?" Grace asks.

"I don't know. You know my dad doesn't like me hanging around you "science pukes"." You quote him and she scoffs.

"You're 22 (Y/n). You can do what you want." She says and you shuck off your jacket. She smiles and pats the pod next to hers. "We're going in."

"How much you wanna bet that Jake's gonna take off?" You ask her and she glares at you.

"$20 that he doesn't." She says and you laugh.

"$20 that he does." You counter and she shakes her head. You lay down in the link pod and close your eyes. You sit up in your avatar and giggle as you change your clothes. Grace meets you outside of the cabin and you see a blur of blue and white charging toward the two of you. "You owe me $20 Grace." You chuckle and she laughs as she picks a fruit. You pick one too and start eating it.

"Hey marine!" Grace calls out. Jake looks up and seems star struck.

"Grace?" He asks.

"Who else numbnuts?" She asks laughing. "Think fast!" She throws the fruit to him and he catches it. "Motor controls looking good." He bites into the fruit and looks at it astonished.

"They're good aren't they?" You ask him and his eyes snap over to you.

"(Y/n)?" He asks and you roll your eyes.

"Well duh." You say and Grace pinches your arm.

"I thought only scientists had avatars?" He asks.

"Well I'm a special case. Did I forget to tell you that I'm going to college for Pandoran botany and Grace is basically my teacher?" You smirk and he chuckles. The patter of feet behind Jake and a voice.

"Jake! Geez we're not supposed to be- Oh hey Grace!" He says with a wave and he notices you. "(Y/n)?" He says as he looks you up and down.

"In the flesh." You say and Jake elbows him and wiggles his eyebrows. His cheeks dust indigo and he clears his throat.

"So no shoes huh?" He says and you laugh.

"Smooth recovery, Spellman. No shoes. It's the way Na'vi travel, so it's how I travel." You say and he nods. Grace nudges you.

"That's a lie. She likes to feel the dirt between her toes. Reminds her of home." Grace says with a smile and you scoffed.

"Okay yeah that might be it." You say and cross your arms. "Don't they have tests to take or somethin'?" You ask annoyed and Grace leads them to the course.

As eclipse fell on Pandora you laid down in your cot and shut your eyes. When you opened the lid of your pod you were met by your dad's face.

"Hey Dad." You greet him but he scoffs.

"You know how I feel about you hanging around these lab coats." Your Dad says and you sigh.

"I'm literally Grace's student. I'm going to be one of these lab coats one day." You tell him and he sighs.

"I'm sorry. You missed dinner." He says and your shoulders sag.

"Sorry Dad, but Jake kept getting distracted by his tail. I had to teach him how to control it." You laugh as Jake hauls himself out of his pod.

"You'd find it weird too if you had a random tuft of fur keep smacking your arms." Jake complains and you laugh at him.

"Been there, and I got over it." You say as you get up fully.

"Baby girl I saved us a couple of plates so we can eat together like usual." Your Dad says and you nod.

"Thanks Dad." You walk out with him. When you sit down with him to eat he looks up at you.

"Somethin' tells me that there's somethin' goin' on between you an' Sully." Your Dad says and you cringe.

"You know I like my men to have a brain. It's why I refuse to go out with Lyle." You say and he laughs.

"Yeah. I forget you don't want to end up like your ma." He says as he fiddles with his food.

"Yeah, no. I don't want to end up like my pa' more like. That woman has no brain. I don't know what you saw in her." You said and he laughed.

"She was pretty and showed interest." He laughed and you rolled your eyes.

"Gross. If you must know Norm has my attention. He's so easily flustered and he's tall and he's really smart." You say as you blush and look away from your Dad.

"I'm not ready." He says and you roll your eyes.

"Dad. I'm 22." You say and he sighs.

"You're my baby." He says and you laugh.

"Dad... I've been thinking." You say and he sets up straight.

"Uh oh. Thats dangerous." He says with a laugh.

"Ha ha. You've been supporting me my whole life. I need to establish my own career because I need to be independent. It's a hard pill to swallow, but I won't have you forever." You say and he reaches across the table and takes hold of your free hand.

"Kiddo. I know it's been rough going, but I'm gonna be here for as long as I can be. I gotta be able to meet any grandbabies you might give me." He says.

"Grandbabies won't happen if you won't let me be an adult and find a man." You post out and he groans.

"I know. Well kid you've got a busy day tomorrow and so do I. Let's get some rack. Love you baby girl." He says as he lands a peck on the top of your head.

"Love you too Dad." You say as you make it back to your room. You shower and dress for bed and then lay down and sleep takes you over.

You had woken up early and gotten to the link room to connect to your avatar. Helping Trudy load her Samson was always easier this way. As you walked into the hangar your Dad was right next to you immediately.

"Baby girl, what did I say about your avatar bein' in the hangar?" He asks and you groan.

"But it's easier to load the Samson this way. No need for friggin' cranes or anything." You say and he makes a face of agreement.

"Alright but it's not allowed inside unless you're loading a ship." He says and you nod.

"Yes, sir. Understood. Lima Charlie, and all those things you say all the time." You joke and he laughs as he playfully nudges your thigh. "You know you can't push me around while I'm in my avatar right?"

"I know, but you're still my little girl." He says and you groan again.

"Dad!" You complain and he walks away from you heading to the gym. You split off toward Trudy and start helping her prepare for everything. Jake rolls up behind the two of you and stops.

"You must be Jake. I'm Trudy and this is my baby. Hope you don't mind that I have you on a side gun. (Y/n) wants to just be a nerd today." She jokes with you and you roll your eyes.

"Ha ha. Very funny Trudy. I'm just enjoying the view today." You say. "But while holding a gun."

"Follow me Jake. Got someone who wants to speak with you." She says and leads him away and you decide to go back outside.

"See ya in a bit Wainfleet." You call over your shoulder. You go and collect some fruits for snacks and wait for everyone to join you.

[heyidkyay]

I guess I’ll take this pain, instead of your name |

Part Twenty-Eight - End

A/n: Ah finally 28 is here!! I'm sorry for the silence, had a lot going on recently, but this is the final part of the series! I can't believe it tbh, though I wouldn't mind writing a few extra scenes in the future just because I love these two a whole lot. But we'll seeee!

Just a warning, this is very similar to the flashback chapters on 24 and the scenes are as the years pass starting from before the time G and Birdie got together, it's ALL from G's POV which was so fucking difficult to write but hopefully I pulled it off. Either way, I hope you enjoy it and thank you to all the love everyone's shown this series, it means so much.

Summary: In life, things changed. The boys you'd once grown up with were men now, and famous ones at that. The type that toured the world and had millions of adoring fans.

The five of you shared a shit ton of history. But you also shared a lot of mixed emotions for one of them in particular, a certain drummer.

Masterlist

It was beaming. First proper hot day they’d had in months. Though in truth, it could’ve just as easily been years seeing as though every weather station was currently claiming a ‘hellish heatwave’ to have taken over the entire country. 

It was bittersweet. 

George was sat outside on the decking, just by the pool in Matty’s back garden with the rest of the band, Ross in a pair of boxers perched on the waters edge with Adam sporting a pair of bright yellow swim trunks right beside him. The two of them had been doing laps but had seemingly tired themselves out under the hot sun and were now kicking up a lazy wave in the shallow end.

“Oi.”

George glanced away from the duo to find a beer being shoved his way, he took the crisp bottle with a soundless nod just as Matty settled into the lounge chair next to him.

“You not getting in then?” The older boy asked him and George curled his lip just as he wrinkled his nose.

“Maybe. Too fucking hot to be arsed though.” He answered, sticky with sweat but enjoying the warmth the summer weather had to gift him.

Matty laughed under his breath and kicked his leg up to cross it over his knee. “Mum ordered food, if you’re hungry. Lou wanted pizza, so.”

George smiled in retort. He’d skipped breakfast that morning, knowing his presence would only lead to more problems now that his mum was home again, and had been hoping to grab something on the way over but hadn’t had the chance. 

“Speak of the devil.” Matty chuckled after and George followed his gaze over to find his younger brother, Louis, scuttling out of the patio’s sliding glass door, water gun in hand and a leggy teenage girl just behind him.

“Get back here, Lou! You’re so dead!” The girl shouted, hair dripping wet and shirt dampened from where she’d obviously been the subject to one of Louis’s antics, but her words were counteracted by the dazzling grin she wore and the bright sheen she had to her eyes. 

The younger boy she was chasing cackled loudly in return, face alive as he zoomed past George and Matty on the loungers in an attempt to escape her. But she was hot on his heels.

“Run, mate!” Matty called out unhelpfully, snorting when his little brother tried to make a song and dance out of it when he chose to go around the garden table a few times.

George chuckled quietly, watching the duo from where he was perched, though he could hardly keep his eyes off of the girl, focused on her expression, the way she moved so effortlessly. Matty seemed to notice it too.

“You’ve got it bad, man.”

George startled a tad at his voice but shook his head anyway as he waved Matty’s accusation off, not bothering to argue against it seeing as though his eyes were still trained on one thing. 

Besides, it weren’t as though he hadn’t heard it all before, the lads loved to tease him for his apparent staring, the longing looks he threw her, but how could he help it? She was this blazing ball of fire, too fucking hot to reach out and touch, but enticing all the same. 

God, he was such a fucking sap.

Matty was still laughing, either at him or the way his younger brother’s face had suddenly fallen in quick realisation, perhaps both, but George could hardly bring himself to care. It’s not like she ever noticed his attention anyway, barely even spared him a hello, let alone a second glance.

“Just talk to her, man. She won’t bite.” Matty told him, as though it was really that simple. But before George could think of a reply, a loud scream echoed out across the garden and he looked up just in time to spot the pair go catapulting into the pool, the girl’s arms wrapped around the younger boy’s shoulders as their bodies cut through the water. “Fucking hell.”

The pair of them were laughing when they reemerged, Louis spluttering whilst the girl just shook the hair out of her face, smile still frozen in place. George’s breath got caught in the back of his throat and his mind went a little fuzzy at the sight of it, witnessing how carefree and gorgeous she always seemed to appear, but especially then.

“You cheat! You can’t do that!” Louis laughed in argument, splashing about a bit. “It ain’t fair.”

The girl merely grinned in retort and reached out to mess the boy’s sodden hair up further, “Sure I can, Lou. An eye for an eye and all that! You wet me with your gun and I tossed you in the pool. Sounds fair enough to me.”

“She’s got you there, mate.” George heard Ross add from the side of the pool, and could hear the mirth that lined his mate’s voice. “Take it like a champ.”

“You get to say that, you’re already soaked!”

“Tell him, Lou!” Matty hollered with that mischievous smile he often favoured.

The girl waded in the water and threw a smirk at Matty, but her eyes lingered on George too for just a second. “You lot getting in or am I gonna have to drag you over too?”

Matty laughed and went to make a stand, but just as he did, he turned his back on the rest of them and shot a sly remark at George, who was still trying to get over the acknowledgment he’d just been given. “Bet you’d love that though, Georgie. Fucking flustered at the very thought, ain’t you?”

George scowled, though he could only watch on as Matty waltzed away, chuckles still bright. He huffed instead and dragged a pitiful hand across his face in hopes to get ahold of himself. But Matty was right, he could feel the warmth of the blush down the length of his back and felt like such a tit for always reacting to the tiniest of interactions she had to offer him.  

“Come on, G! Getting old here!” 

He swallowed heavily at the sound of her voice, but didn’t dare look up just yet. G. It was a first, that was for sure. Hadn’t really stuck around anywhere long enough to make many friends, let alone have a nickname surface. He only hoped it’d stick, especially if she was the one calling out for him.

“I’m coming!” He said after a quick breath and only then chanced a glance, surprised to find her wild eyes still set on him. She flashed him a pleased grin and- “Shit.” He murmured to himself, almost stilling in place at the realisation that hit him. He was so fucking gone, wasn’t he?

—

London was different to Wilmslow, George had decided. Busier. You could hear the noise of the city at night sneak in through the front bedroom window, and feel the shake of the trains that ran across the back of the lane all through the house. It was nice though, these differences. The City. The noise. Mostly because the quiet never had sat well with him.

“Oi, those carrots won’t cut themselves, you know.”

George found himself smiling at the sound of Dee’s voice and pulled his gaze away from the open back door to see her grinning back at him. She was currently cooking up a storm, spices scattered everywhere and water bubbling from a metal pot sat up on the hob, but she’d wanted to make her famous shepherd’s pie for her favourite niece during their stay, and somehow he’d gotten roped into helping.

Not that he’d ever say no, he’d grown fond of the two women that had welcomed him in with open arms far too quickly- but that was without mentioning the lighthearted threats that had been given if he dared even step a toe out of line with her. Or at least, he hoped they were lighthearted.

“Daydreamin’?”

He hummed in return and went back to his kitchen duties, skinning the orange vegetables and then dicing. “Something like that.”

Dee mimicked the sound with a faint titter of her own and he watched closely as she glanced back out the door and into the garden, seeing the scene he’d been so absorbed in.

Nana (“Can’t be callin’ me by nothing else, my darlin’, family’s family and you’re it now.” Is what she’d claimed from the very start, not drawing any attention to the hitched breath George had given in turn) was perched in a deck chair, one of those fabric ones with the silver metal legs and striped cloth backing, a shovel in one hand and a pot in the other. Cyril, who seemed content to laze about in the hazy summer heat, was sprawled out on the grass right beside her, drool dripping from his open jaw and eyes closed. Nana kept patting his belly every few minutes but he didn’t care to move from his slumber.

Birdie was right there with them as well, only she was knee deep in the flowerbeds, soil painting the skin up to her elbows and blackening the overalls she’d adorned earlier. The pink spade she’d picked out was lost somewhere to the left of her and she was squinting in the afternoon sun, attention drifting back and forth between the flowers they were planting and the seventy-three year old giving out orders. They appeared to be speaking about something or other now though, Birdie trying hard to keep her mouth from lifting into an embarrassed sort of smile whilst Nana merely chuckled away.

“How’s she really been?” Dee quizzed him, plopping the carrots he’d cut into another pot before tossing the steaming potatoes that had just been boiled. The question was oddly quiet for her, enough for George to notice at least, seeing as though the woman had been nothing but a rocket since the minute they’d met.

He wondered if she knew, albeit vaguely. But then shook the thought away, if either of these women knew anything that had been going on back home there’d surely be hell to pay. That he understood. Still, it wasn’t his secret to tell and Birdie had been adamant about it, even after hearing his incentives.

“She’s been alright, keeping busy in truth. Got exams soon.”

The red-haired woman hummed again, staring off into space for a moment before those piercing eyes of hers were drilled into his. He fought not to outwardly react.

“Doesn’t seem alright, what with her walking in all battered and bruised. Looks more smurf-like than human to me.”

George swallowed, stuck on what to say, and it wasn’t like he had something to preoccupy himself with now that the carrots were gone. He sighed softly. “She’s… alright- strong, really. Just a lot going on at school, you know? And her mum’s been busy.”

Dee’s tongue prodded the inside of her cheek at that but turned back to fork the mince she was frying. “Never did like her much. But especially after the funeral.” She revealed and looked almost as though she was gritting her teeth to get the words out. “Din’t come to the reception. Just left little Dove here with us and got on the first train home. Could understand, somewhat. Woman had lost a husband, hadn’t she? But then, I’d lost my brother. Mum, a son, and that little girl out there, well, she’d lost her dad. Her mum didn’t want much responsibility for her afterwards, hardly saw the arse-end of her in the long months after. A visit once in a blue moon and a phone call each Thursday. Honestly believed the kid would stay living here with us, until she swanned back in and swept her back up north.”

A silence settled in the breath Dee took then and George’s emotions warred within. He choked them back and swallowed them down to brew. 

“Fought hard to keep her, din’t think the woman was capable of lookin’ after herself, let alone a kid. But,” Dee shrugged then, helplessly. “She’s her mum, ain’t she? Not much we could do about it. Lost touch a bit after that, she wanted distance, said we reminded her too much of him. Claimed our Dove couldn’t stomach the reminder either. So we listened. For her sake if nothing else. Killed my mum though.”

George swallowed thickly. “Can imagine. I don’t know how I’d act if I ever lost her.”

Dee seemed to pause at that, then turned to regard him slowly and with a very sweet smile, one George had never been gifted by an adult in his lifetime. It threw him.

“You’re a good sort, Georgie. Look after her well, don’t you?” Her noiseless chuckle surprised him but then she just shook her head, obviously not expecting an actual answer. He watched on as she inhaled slowly only to then throw the tea towel she’d been clinging onto over her shoulder, wiping the underneaths of her eyes. He didn't know what to say or how to make things better. “Start mashing those spuds for me, would ya doll? Just gonna nip to the loo.”

George could only nod, surprised by the whole event but especially upon seeing Dee suddenly so choked up. He didn’t have much time to dwell on it though, seeing as though Birdie came swanning into the kitchen just after her Aunt had disappeared. 

The girl was smiling happily, happier than he’d seen her in a long while, ever even. It made him stop short, if only to take her in. The freckles on her cheeks that the sun had warmed and strengthened. The cheeky smile that dimpled the right corner of her mouth. The wrinkle in her nose that stood out amongst the gentle burn that dotted its bridge…

The twinkle in her eyes as she zeroed in on him.

“Where’s Aunt Dee?” The girl asked, picking up a pea-pod from off the counter and biting into it. George’s face wrinkled in amused anguish.

“Toilet.” He answered her, falling into one of the empty bar stools stood behind. “Finally decided to come help, have you then?”

She stepped closer and smirked up at him. “Nope.” The next bite she took made a massive crunching sound, her grin widened. 

George rolled his eyes, before taking the chance to get another good look at her. If it weren’t for the fact that Nana was looming just beyond the door, he’d have kissed her. 

The woman was a dainty thing, yes, but fucking terrifying too. And seeing as they’d yet to announce anything between them, let alone anyone else, he didn’t want to rock the boat too hard this early on. A few kisses were just a few kisses, right?

“What’s got you in a mard?” Birdie chuckled, reaching out a dirtied finger to poke at his cheek. He dipped away slightly from the offending hand but didn’t put up much of a fight, reckoned she could be covered in mouldy milk and he’d still want to snog her senseless. 

“Nothing, just thinking.” He told her honestly.

She hummed and leaned in closer, pea-pod now gone and her hands tucked into the pockets of her overalls. She was trying to be intimidating, playful. He liked seeing her so alive.

“Try not to hurt yourself there.”

George chuckled, heart beating quicker now. “Always so mean.”

“Hm, maybe. But you like me for it.” She shot back confidently. 

I do. 

“Keep on wishing, B.”

She snorted, and it would’ve been an ugly sound on anyone else, but this was her. His Birdie.

“Oh, I will.” She half-sung, eyes really shimmering now beneath the long lashes they so often hid themselves behind. 

George couldn’t find it in himself to look away, lost on her. 

Then a hand was touching his and he felt something press into the palm of his. Her soil covered fingernails danced over the inside of his wrist for a single second just as she leant in to press her soft lips to his cheek. 

A peck, a smile, and then she was gone it seemed.

George stared off after her, watched the way her hair fell loosely and how the light only seemed to carve a path for her through the dimly lit hallway. She disappeared round the bend and he took a breath before glancing down into his hand.

His mouth dried up at the sight of the old metal lighter which now sat there. And carved ever so carefully into the metal casing at the very bottom was a simple ‘B+G’.

—

“Move over.” Someone grunted somewhere to the right and George struggled against the urge to elbow his way into a more comfortable position. “Tossers.”

He huffed a bit at that but shuffled further left anyway, creating some more room for the giant twat sat on the other end of the backseat in hopes that it’d shut him up. Louis and Birdie were right there between them, Lou half on top of B, and B half on top of him. 

Ross seemed to have gotten the better end of the stick in reality, even if his oversized limbs had been crammed into the back with them. Matty and Adam were more than alright though, happy as Larry sat in the front, fiddling with the radio.

“Will you lot shut up? Might miss it.” Matty snipped, batting away Hann’s hand when he tried to turn up the dial.

“Fuck off, Matty.” Ross shot right back, still sodding squirming. “How the fuck did you even manage to bag the front seat anyway? You’re about the size of my left toe.”

Louis snorted loudly at that, whilst Matty sent Ross a scathing look full of sarky laughter. “It’s my fucking car, that’s why, dickhead.”

Just as Ross drew in another breath to retaliate, Birdie swooped in to save the day, holding out an arm across Louis to signal for Ross to pack it in. “You’re both being annoying, just shut up and stop swearing, yeah? Otherwise we’ll never hear the sodding radio and Denise will have all our heads.”

“Mum says a lot worse.” Louis intoned then, which had them all snickering and Matty high-fiving his little brother whilst looking proud. George hit his head against the window when Birdie ducked slightly to avoid being hit, she winced at the sound it made. 

“Sorry, babe.” She whispered and leant in closer to rub the top of his head gently with a soft laugh. No one else was appeared go be paying much attention to them though, all the focus honed in on the radio.

At first, both him and Hann had argued against getting in the car- could’ve just as easily gathered around the stereo in the kitchen for this- but Matt, Birdie and Ross had been dead set on hearing it in the car.

“It’s got to be in the car! We can’t not hear it in the car!” Matty had argued, and not just for the sake of it, only to have then been cut off by B and her rapid agreement, “Exactly! It’s a car song! People only ever listen to the radio when they’re drivin’!” Her accent was always stronger the more determined she got. “So we’re listening to it in the car whether you lot wanna or not, I don’t care if your balls get squished or your elbows don’t fit. We are.”

And that had been it. Enough said. 

“You’re alright.” George chuckled under his breath, taking her hand in his and pulling them both down into his lap. She seemed content enough to cuddle further into his side at that and he couldn’t even bring himself to mind, thumbing her knuckles whilst he rested his chin atop her head.

“Oh shit, here it is! It’s coming on!”

“Fuck. Fuck. Fuuccck.”

“Shut the fuck up!!”

“Think I’m gonna shit myself.”

Birdie and Louis laughed at their many reactions and George could only cling on a little tighter to the hand that was keeping him grounded. Never had he felt so fucking sick with nerves.

“Shut up you lot, it’s on! It’s on!”

The car fell dead silent at Birdie’s interruption and they all seemed to lean forward in their seats simultaneously, as though it would give them a better chance at listening in. 

“Yeah, and here’s a new one for you.” Huw Stephens’s voice rang out and George could barely believe that they were actually this close, “Just in, and from their recent EP titled Facedown, we’ve got the up and coming sound of The 1975 for you lovely ladies and gentlemen! Buzzing with this one boys, reckon the rest of you will be too. So here it is, this is BBC Radio 1 and up next is The City.”

The whole lot of them broke out into hollers and cheers when the intro played, the entire car bouncing on its wearing tires as they all started to prat about in their excitement. Ross close to shaking Hann’s chair out of its hinges, Louis jumping between the two front seats to turn the dial up even louder, Matty drumming loudly against the dash, Adam kicking his feet, and B, his beautiful B, screaming her heart out for them all as she laughed and clapped and started to sing as loudly as she possibly could alongside Matty’s voice that’d started playing through the speakers.

And all George could think was, fuck.

—

“You’ve gotta run faster!”

“I fucking am!”

“You’re not!” She laughed, the Californian sun warming every inch of her even as it begun to set, “Faster, G!”

“Please, none of that! Hear enough of it back in the bunks, thanks!” Came Matty’s witty quip, earning a few knowing laughs. George turned around to flip him off for it but Birdie appeared to have beaten him to it.

“Jealous much, Matthew?”

“Of G? ‘Course, darling!” Matty quipped as he moved across the sand to drape himself across her back, spliff caught between his fingers. “Should’ve jumped you way back when I had the chance.”

Birdie snorted and elbowed him lightly but didn’t force him away, “Meant of me, you twat. Figured if I hadn’t gotten there first, you might’ve tried your luck with G, Matt.”

“Oh how I wish!” Matty dramatised, sighing loudly as he casted a set of seductive eyes in George’s direction, “Always been gone on you though, our George. I never stood a chance.”

“Yeah, so piss off of her.” George told the curly haired idiot with a small smirk as he made his way back over, a bright orange kite still wrapped around his hand. 

Matty took it as his chance to play the joker though and all but dived for him the second he got close enough, planting a sloppy kiss to the side of his face. George couldn’t help the unmanly sound that escaped him at the gesture and could only laugh along with the rest of them when he shoved the clingy lad off.

“Got me good, you prick.” He chuckled, swiping at his wet cheek.

“And that’s only the start of it, mate.” Matty winked, then made his way back over to where the rest of the band had sprawled about on the sand. “Just imagine it, G! I’d even let you top, you know. A proper giver me.”

Ross cackled at the face Georgemade and Hann rolled his eyes with a smile that couldn’t be helped when Matty dropped himself down beside him, though he took the offered joint with no fuss.

“Can just picture the utter chaos it’d cause.” Ross choked out, sighing happily as he kicked his legs out before him, grinning at the very thought. 

“I’m alright, thanks.” George felt the need to mention as he wrapped an arm around Birdie’s waist, smiling when the girl melted into him, then let up on the string of the kite when her fingers asked for it.

It’d been her idea of course, the kites. Got three of them whilst they’d been stuck in sound check one morning and brought them back to the venue alongside a shit ton of food. They’d only remembered them a couple days later when everyone had decided to spend a free night out on the beach, just them drinking and enjoying what little time they had when not performing.

“Ah, well you’re the one who’ll be missing out, man!” Matty replied with a lazy smirk and George could only laugh, swaying slightly now as he rested his chin atop the girl’s sun-warmed hair. 

“Reckon I’ve already got my hands quite full here, mate.”

“And what’s that meant to mean?” Birdie immediately questioned with a raised brow as she turned in his grip to better face him, “‘Cause I’m pretty sure it’s the other way round, mate.”

“Oh yeah?” George humoured her, he hadn’t even meant anything by it, loved her more than he did the air itself in fact, but it was always fun rilling her up a bit. “How so?”

“Well, you’re proper clingy for one.”

George hissed through his teeth as though wounded, whilst the others oohed. 

“Got you there.” Hann snickered and the others appeared to agree. Was he really that bad?

“And two, you don’t think through half the shit you say sometimes.”

George raised a brow at that.

“Yeah, don’t fucking act like it ain’t true!” She argued with the tiny beginnings of a smile, “The amount of times I’ve had to talk you out of a corner. The lot of yous in fact.”

“Oi, this is rinse G hour, not us!” Matty frowned and threw a thumbs down at them. “TOMATO. TOMATO.”

With a snort, Birdie spun back towards the curly haired freak, “Did you just shout tomato?”

“Yeah,” Matty shrugged, nicking back the joint off Adam that had dwindled down to all but a nub, “Had none to throw, did I?”

Birdie looked towards the sky. “God save me.”

And just like that, the whole band started belting out a Sex Pistols classic in unison.

“God save the queen! She’s not a human being! And there’s no future! And England’s dreamin’!”

“Fucking idiots.” She sighed, but the attention soon diverged when a rowdy crowd started making themselves known a little further down the beach. 

They all shared a look, knowing it’d be best to head back to the bus before they were soon spotted and mobbed, all groaning unhappily as they forced themselves up onto their feet. George started on the clear up, seeing as though he was already standing, Birdie following just behind him whilst the other boys gathered up the beer and whatever else they’d procured.

Starting the trek back to the bus, stationed just past the marina, George allowed the others to walk on ahead a bit and fell into step with B, wrapping an arm around her shoulders whilst they slowly followed behind.

“You know, you looked proper fit running up and down that beach.”

He chuckled at the sudden remark and let her wind an arm around his waist to better allow her body to mould into his. “Yeah, kite an’ all?”

He felt, more than heard her laugh, before she hummed. The vibration of it rippled across the skin just beneath her head. “Defo. Though you could’ve done without all these extra layers.” She replied, then tugged at the hem of his tee to further drill home her point.

“It’s autumn, B, fucking chilly too. You really expect me to go full Baywatch on the beach just to appease you, ey?”

“‘Course.” She answered and he could tell she was smirking by the wave in her tone. “You look good, should show it off more often.”

He didn’t have much of a reply to offer that. Though it wasn’t because she’d caught him off guard, per say, it was just that he still wasn’t used to the way she so openly complimented him, on everything he did, to each and every way he looked. He’d never had that before. But she gave it to him freely, without cost, without expectation.

“Stop flirting with me.” Is what he decided on when he couldn’t find it in himself to dampen the grin he was now sporting. She peered up at him, wearing a sly smile of her own.

“Why, does it get you all flustered?” She teased, obviously pleased with herself as she poked his ribs. He pinched her hip softly in retaliation and laughed when she wrinkled her nose up at him.

“No, I’m just resisting the urge to bend you over on this beach.”

But hey, just because her comments had him flushing like a teenage boy, didn’t mean that he couldn’t give it back twice as bad. Plus, he loved seeing her melt, the way her cheeks would tint that pretty pink colour and how she’d start to chew on her bottom lip simply to keep from smiling.

“You’ll pay for that when we’re back on the bus.”

“Promise?” He snarked back with another chuckle, tugging her in closer.

She hummed once more, fingers playing with the hand that fell from her shoulder now. “Have to keep it down though, don’t need Matty interrupting.”

George’s lip curled, “Nah, on second thought, I’ll just wait for a venue loo stall.”

He laughed happily when she elbowed his side. “Charming.”

—

It was mayhem. Proper, honest to God mayhem. And he’d no idea how things had gotten so out of hand, who half the people traipsing through his living room even were, but he was fucking happy if nothing else. Over the moon, even.

“Geee!”

George glanced to his left just in time to spot a drunken Matty stumbling his way on over, the man clung to his shoulders the first chance he got and grinned up at him. He reeked of beer and wine.

“So fucking pleased for you, mate. Did I mention that already? Just, proper buzzing for you.” The drunkard rambled, eyes squinted from the extremity of his smile.

George chuckled and wrapped an arm around the shorter lad, happy to accommodate his need for comfort as well as keep him upright. Matty was touchy on a good day, but when you’d got a good few drinks in him he was like a sloth to a tree branch.

“You did mention it, mate.” George replied and withheld his amusement when Matty frowned, “But I appreciate it. Really.”

The frown then etched itself into a smile at that, all fond and goofy as Matty wiggled even closer into his embrace, “Good. Fucking deserve it. You and her both, yeah?”

With a harsh sallow, George felt that tightness he’d been feeling in his chest as of late rise. “Thanks, mate.” He croaked out and then coughed to clear his throat. 

Deserve. It was a difficult thing for him to come to terms with, deeming what he did and didn’t deserve. A struggle he’d been dealing with his whole life, and which had only tripled in recent years. The flat was something he’d earned, something both he and Birdie had talked about since they’d both been teenagers. An escape. But they’d already gone and done that, hadn’t they? Left Wilmslow behind, left everyone who didn’t matter behind. Did it make them better than? Safer now? George’s mind was always at war with his head, but as of late, as the band only grew, and as life continued on, it only seemed to get louder.

“Fuckin’ sickkk too!” 

Matty’s drunken nonsense pulled him back from his scattered thoughts then and George smiled down at his mate. The flat was sick, they’d spent weeks searching for the right one, him and B, travelled all over London looking, and then they’d found this one. It wasn’t huge, nothing too fancy or grand, but it was home. And neither one of them had ever had much of that.

“Ross, tell him! Tell him it’s sick!” Matty shouted again, having just spotted Ross making his way through the crowd. The giant looked well on his way to pissed too, but seemed to be holding on quite well. George reckoned it was simply down to his height. 

“It’s sick!” Ross easily repeated, grinning and letting Matty grab onto him too before the idiot saw someone else he knew and started walking away, calling out promises to find them again soon. Ross leaned in to him then and murmured, “What’s sick?”

George breathed a chuckle through his nose and just shook his head, Ross knew better than to prod any further.

“Flat is looking good by the way, mate. Dunno who half of these fuckers are though.” The bassist commented, glancing out around the room.

George could only agree, “Fuck if I do. Pretty sure Grimmy invited a couple dozen of his mates with him.”

Ross started nodding rapidly at that, raising his beer as he did. “Yeah, spotted that Harry Styles in your loo.”

“In my loo?”

“In your loo.”

“The fuck were you doing in my bathroom with Harry Styles, Ross?” George questioned his mate, bewildered now, but even with the state of him, George knew that Ross could make friends with just about anyone. Send the man into a den full of hungry hyenas and he’d walk out with a pal for life. 

Ross simply shrugged, “He was coming out, I was going in, he liked my hair.”

George lifted his eyebrows and pursed his lips, as though that made any sense, “Oh right, yeah.”

Ross hummed then perked up again, “Here she is. The lady of the hour!”

Following the direction of the man’s gaze, George grinned and felt the rest of the room dampen down to a droning droll around him as Birdie walked on over, bottle of wine in tucked under her arm.

“Wahey! Would you look at that!” Ross greeted her cheerfully, roping the girl into a warm hug, “You’ve finally come to see me!”

“I saw you-“ She paused and hiccuped with a half-arsed glare, “-ages ago, you big knobhead.”

“Oof.” Ross sounded, clasping a hand over his hurt heart, “Alright, sorry! Just missed you is all, only had like five minutes with you by the door.”

Birdie pouted then, and George knew she was truly sloshed by the real tears he saw well in her eyes.

“I’m sorry, Ro! I haven’t had the chance. There’s all these people here annoying me.” She waved her hand around aimlessly above her head, squinting as she did, before she then huffed. She turned towards George then, all but stepping on his toes to get in his space, not that he minded, “Did you know One Direction are here? In my flat?”

“Our flat.” George corrected with a tiny grin whilst she necked another few gulps of wine.

“What I said, ain’t it?” Birdie retorted, glancing about the room again. “Can you believe Zayn fucking Malik tried to give me a joint too? And I said-“ She hiccuped again then and George reached out to steady her slight;y, “-I told him, right, I said but you’re just a baby! And he laughed at me, G. Laughed! I almost told him that that one song of theirs was shit, but I didn’t. Felt bad for even thinking it. You know?”

Ross was snickering away to the left of them, obviously pleased with the state of their best mate, whilst George attempted to cajole the wine bottle from out under her arm.

“He’s the fit one, ain’t he?”

“They’re all bloody fit, Ross!” Birdie argued with the idiot whilst George sighed, wondering where on Earth he’d found the pair of them, “Got to be ‘cause all them girls love ‘em. Like you lot, I ‘spose.”

That startled quite the laugh out of Ross and he swayed nearer, “You ‘spose? I’m fucking hurt here, are you saying we’re not fit, B?”

She rolled her eyes as though she was annoyed with him for not understanding what she’d meant and groaned, “No, you are fit. Just not as fit as them, yeah?”

George snorted but had finally managed to snag the bottle loose, she frowned and went to take it back, though he seemed to be able to distract her with his next question, “Not fit enough am I, Birdie? Why d’ya not ask one of them to move in with you then?”

The crease between her brow deepened at his ask and her hands came up to wrap themselves around his neck, “‘Cause they’re babies! I’ve just said this, G. Aren’t you listenin’?”

“Think they’re only a couple years younger.” Ross countered but he put his hands up in surrender when Birdie retorted with, “Exactly. Babies, Ross! Tiny little goblin children.”

“Right, yeah. ‘Course.”

George sighed again, “Think it’s time for you to get to bed, B.”

“What? No!” The girl squawked and stumbled in his hold as she reeled backwards, “I’m fine, completeeeely fine! So fine, in fact, that I bet I could do a backflip. Right here. Right now.”

“You can’t do a backflip even when sober, sweetheart.”

“I can too.” She pouted, retracting her arms from around his neck even though he’d yet to relinquish his hold on her. He laughed at her adamancy on the subject though and determined that he’d have to remind her once she’d sobered up. 

“Sure, B.” He soothed, carding a gentle hand through her messy hair and tucking a loose strand behind her ear. 

“You’re really pretty though, G. Like so pretty I feel the need to bark or something. Like a dog would at a squirrel.”

Ross actually lost his footing upon hearing that and spat what little dregs of drink that remained in his mouth out onto their brand new floor. “Bark??” He questioned her, and even though George was just as baffled as he was, he had the fucking common sense not to quiz a drunken twat. No matter how lovely they were.

“Was that a bit much?” Birdie asked him, smiling dopily now as she started to deflate, leaning more heavily into George’s side. Ross made a face and George cut his eyes at the lad. But the girl didn’t seem to notice nor care and simply carried on, “Do you reckon Cillian Murphy would let me marry him? He was well fit in that movie, weren’t he? That one with all them dreams and Tom Hardy… Fuck, I’d fuck Tom hardy. Wouldn’t you, G?”

George pressed his lips together to keep himself from outwardly reacting, doubting that she’d be all that susceptible to being laughed at, then said, “Yeah Birdie, be mad not to.”

He’d expected Ross to find amusement in her words too but only found the man to be nodding along solemnly, George tightened his mouth to hold back an ugly snort. 

“I know!” Birdie went on, and George was practically holding her up now, even as she hiccuped again. “Oh, but he’s not as fit as you, G. Especially when you start doing that thing with your-”

A hand was all too quick to muffle her admission then, and from the dying light in Ross’s eyes George was beyond thankful that he hadn’t given the prick the opportunity to lord something so incriminating over their heads for the rest of their sorry lives. 

“Alright, lovely, time for bed, yeah?”

“Oi, she weren’t done, were you, B? What were you gonna say just then, sweetheart?” Ross tried and barely even reacted to the swift kick George gave his leg whilst Birdie pried his hand away from her mouth.

“I don’t remember. But if I do, I’ll call for you! Yeah?”

Ross nodded in quick succession and George took the chance to start leading his girlfriend away from the rest of the party.

He sighed in utter relief once they reached the last door at the very end of the hallway and shuffled them on through. Their bedroom was halfway through the unpacking stage at the moment, just the bed and a dresser had been put together, so he had to be extremely careful when trying to manoeuvre their way past the many boxes that littered the floor.

“Alright there, love?” George questioned after he’d gone and propped the girl down on the edge of the mattress, already making the effort to start peeling off her socks as well as the dress she’d picked out earlier that evening. She looked stunning in it, even now with her hair in disarray and a small stain marring the collar. 

She hummed softly in response.

“Tired?” He asked. 

“Tired.”

“Thought so,” George chuckled quietly, pulling back the covers so that she could climb in, “Had fun though, yeah?”

“So much.” She answered him, rubbing her eyes sleepily which only removed the mascara she’d popped on whilst getting ready and darkened the underneaths of them. “You?”

“You were there, weren’t you? So ‘course I did.”

“Sap.” She laughed, reaching out to run a hand through his unruly hair. “Love you.”

He smiled and released an airy breath, “Love you. Too much, I reckon.”

She grinned up at him and shuffled further under the duvet, George decided to grab a makeup wipe and help clear up her face, knowing she’d be all stroppy come morning when her skin was horrible and the pillowcases were stained.

“Stay still, you weirdo.” He scolded with a light chuckle when she started to wiggle about beneath his careful hand, “I’m just tryna get this eye shit off for you.”

“Oh.” She whispered, sleep lining every inch of her voice, eyes still wound shut as she hunched her shoulders up towards her ears. “Sorry.”

“No need to be sorry, love.”

“But you’re so lovely to me, G. Always.” She sighed, smiling softly.

“What you deserve, ain’t it?” He replied in the same hushed tone, and there was that word again.

“Hm. I’m glad I have you. And our home too.”

George could only smile as he popped the stained wipe into the little bin nearby. 

“Me too, Birdie.” He admitted, sliding in beside the girl to wrap her up in his arms. He could hardly care less about the party still going on outside. He’d locked the door on their way in and Hann had yet to leave, so he was sure that things would soon sort themselves out. Besides, Ross knew where they’d wandered off to if anyone asked so there was nothing more to worry about.

Nothing at all.

—

He could hardly take it.

It was quiet. Eerily so. But his head was too fucking loud. Way too fucking loud. 

He’d been spiralling as of late. He knew it. Could read the signs as easily as he could the morning paper, but it’d been a long while since the last. Before he’d left home even.

But he was. Spiralling. 

He was free-falling. Had lost his footing somewhere on the curb outside and had yet to land, yet to catch his breath.

But everything was good. 

Apart from the not eating. The not sleeping. 

Everything had been good.

He was good. Things were good. Things were fine. 

Fine. Fine. Fine.

Why was he spiralling again? 

He wanted to scream. Throw his fist through a wall and leave it at that. Could feel the agitation he constantly felt cloud him like a cloak. 

His foot started tapping away then, and his fingers soon followed. He itched for a drink, something to ease it all, so he stood from where he’d been holed up by his desk all day and stormed through the flat into the living room.

There was a bar cart of sorts set up there, between the sofa and the tele. A wheeled antique cabinet Birdie had seen on one of their evening escapades and reckoned it would serve well when hosting the alcoholics they called friends. 

George paused by it for a split second before he flipped the doors open, rattling the bottles inside as another round of thoughts plagued his mind. Friends. Did he have any that weren’t hers?

He grunted and dragged one of the newer JD bottles out, the glass clinking against every other in his fidgety haste. He kicked it closed behind him and wandered his way out onto the small balcony, one of the many things that had sold them on the place all those years ago, and unscrewed the lid.

It was late evening now. Seven, eight-ish or so, at least that’s what he reckoned. The streetlights were lit on the narrow street below and it was just beginning to spit, he raised the bottle up towards the Heavens, toasting the weather’s sardonic humour, before he necked a few gulps.

He hated it. Hated everything as of late. The way he looked. How things sounded. When people would smile at him. Joke. Talk. 

He felt trapped. Knotted up with baggage, his head the stone weighing him down. He felt scared. Terrified, even. And he couldn’t for the life of him make sense of any of it. 

He sounded like a fucking prick. He knew that. But he didn’t much care, because what was the point in caring anyway? When they’d yet to even start on the next album they’d promised. Yet to even write another song. It was too much. All he ever felt was pressure. Coming at him from all sides. When he was in the studio. When he was at home. 

No one could leave him the fuck alone.

“George?”

A voice called out distantly, he was quick to down another shot of the murky liquid and squeeze his eyes tightly shut to simply give himself a second of reprieve, before he stepped back through the balcony doors and into the warmth of the flat. 

He grunted in reply after he’d tucked the bottle up onto a high shelf and switched on the tele, if only to make it seem like he hadn’t been stewing in his own head since he last seen her that morning.

“There you are, picked up takeaway on my way home. Figured you might not have eaten yet.” Birdie greeted as she waltzed through the living room, pecking his cheek before heading on over to the kitchen. He watched through the transom window as she placed a white carrier bag onto the counter then make a grab for the plates in one of the higher cabinets, coat already having been shucked off in the hallway and slippers on her feet. “You get much done today then?” She asked him, “Spoke with Matty on my lunch break, he’ll be in London again next week.”

George could only hum, eyes focused intently on the tele screen but not taking any of it in.

“You even watching that? Sound ain’t even turned on, you dafty.” She laughed from the other side of the wall. He heard her riffle through the drawers for something or other, but didn’t reply. “G, babe. You alright?”

“Fine.”

Fine. Fine. Fine.

He had to force himself to breath.

“Fine? Don’t sound it, love. What’s up?” She questioned further, having stopped what she was doing to wander back in.

He gritted his teeth. She only ever prodded. Poking and poking. More and more. Incessant. Never knew when to give the fuck up. 

“I’m fine. Just said that, didn’t I?”

She paused, surprised by the bite behind his words. He swallowed heavily, the bitter twang of whiskey still stained his tongue, his teeth. 

“Don’t have to be like that, G. Was just asking.” Was what she replied with after a long and silent minute had passed. 

George could only scoff, throwing the tv remote he still clung to somewhere onto he sofa behind him. “Yeah, well don’t. I’ve said I’m fine. So leave it, will you?”

She made this face, the same one she always did when she was hurt, but not anything teary or sad, just angered. “This what I’ve got to look forward to each time I come home, then? You and these foul fucking moods you work yourself into. What, all ‘cause tours stopped and the album’s not coming along the way you hoped? Well, boo-fucking-hoo, George. That’s life. Not everything’s perfect. And you don’t get to sit there and take it all out on me, day in and day-fucking-out.”

“Just fuck off, Birdie. I don’t need your shit on top of everything else.” George snipped back and wasn’t fully prepared for the way she shot towards him, snatching up the tele remote to switch the whole thing off just so he’d look at her.

“Don’t call me that when you’re being the prick. I haven’t done a thing wrong, only asked after you.”

George rolled his eyes, already tired of it all. “Leave it out.” 

He then huffed and went to grab the set of silver keys that had been left on the console.

She threw her hands up in the air, shoulders hunching. “What the fuck, G? Where’re you going now? You can’t just leave like this.”

“The fuck I can’t.” He snorted unkindly, shaking his head as he shoved the keys into his pocket and made his way back through the house to get to his studio.

“George.” He heard her call after him, but not too far behind. “At least tell me where you’re going so I know you’ll be safe. You’ve been drinking again so you can’t fucking drive. Call a cab or something, head to Hann’s.”

His fists were at his temple then, drilling themselves a hole there, if only to subside some of the torment he felt his mind swimming in. She was at the door a second later, looking lost and hurt, sad now, not angry. 

“G, please.”

He didn’t know why but he just laughed a little to himself after having heard her plea, hands falling aimlessly to his sides as he shook his head once more. “I can’t fucking do this anymore.” He heard himself say.

She sighed, this heavy thing that weighed her down before it expanded out into the rest of the room, almost as if it wanted to suffocate not just her but him too. “Can’t do what?”

“This!” He said harshly, hardly even sparing her a glance as he begun to pack away his laptop, his mixing shit, and whatever else cluttered the desk. “I can’t do this anymore.”

“What’s that meant to mean?”

“I just can’t keep fucking pretending! Can’t-” He faltered and faffed his hand about in midair before throwing it downwards to shove a charger into a case, “Can’t carry on like I’m fine. Like everything’s fucking fine, all the fucking time. Like it’ll all work out. Like this is where I’m meant to be.”

A long stretch dragged out between them and all that could be heard was the traffic of the inner city from just outside their flat. He used to love it, but despised it in that second.

“I don’t… I don’t know what you want me to do, George. What you need to make things better.”

He was shaking now, trembling even. Noticed it as his hand faltered when going to pick up the hard-drive sat behind a frame she’d gifted him for his twentieth birthday, one that had sat proudly on his desk ever since he’d unwrapped it.

“I’m gonna go to LA for a bit.” He heard himself murmur whilst he dragged his gaze away from the smiling duo behind the glass. “Stay with Matty, work on the album, explore some of the options out there.”

“For how long?”

Her voice had never seemed so small.

“I don’t know.” He returned and forced himself to continue packing up, tucking his phone into his back pocket and breathing as much as his hollow lungs would allow. “Just, I don’t know, alright. Don’t wait for me, yeah? I’ll figure it out.”

A surprised albeit wet scoff bypassed her mouth then, “What’s that meant to mean? Are you ending things? Is that what this is?”

He squeezed his eyes shut again, if only to appease the swirling storm going on inside his head. His chest ached with the very motion and he fought not to spare her another look as he turned around to head down the hallway.

“George! You can’t just say shit like that and leave.” She shouted, though there were tears in her voice. “If you’re ending things with me, at least have the balls to tell me straight.”

“I don’t fucking know what I’m doing! Alright?” He shouted back at her, the pounding in his head, the whispers, growing in tenfold as he spun around on his heel to stare back the only girl he’d ever loved. “I feel trapped! And I fucking hate it! I don’t want to leave but what else is there? Stay here and drive myself fucking insane?”

She appeared to fold in on herself then, just looked back at him with eyes of dying wildfire and he had to live with the knowledge that he’d been the one to snuff them out.

“We were happy. And I love you. Isn’t that enough?”

The anger was long gone now, replaced only by a hot and heavy pit of grief. “But what if I’m not in love with you anymore?”

George watched her break into pieces, right there on the hallway floor before his very eyes. And he couldn’t even reach out to hold her together, to take back the cruel words.

“I love you.” He croaked, “But-”

“You’re just not sure if you’re in love with me.” She finished for him, wet tears hanging from her chin and drowning out what little flames she’d had left behind her eyes.

“I’m sorry.”

It was all he could think to say.

“Sorry.” She mimicked, “Why? Why now?”

He swallowed, but there was a rock stuck there at the very top of his windpipe. He couldn’t get the right words out. Felt as though all his organs were failing. 

She shook beneath his hands and it was that reaction that had him realising that he’d crossed the floor to meet her. He was crying too he found, because when he stared into her eyes she was all blurred and disfigured. 

She clung to the front of his t-shirt in that next second and he wound his hands around her wrists, not pulling them away, just holding.

“Please.”

And everything inside him shattered with that one word. 

Splintered his entire being, in truth, and sent whatever was left of him ricocheting outwards. She’d gotten caught in the crossfire it seemed and he could only lean in a little closer to press his lips to her forehead whilst she sobbed all she had left to give into his shoulder.

—

Her head was rested against his arm and George did his very best not to move a single inch, even with the turbulence of the plane shaking them this way and that, in hopes not to wake her.

The doctor had given her the okay to fly and although the lot of them had been all too happy spending a couple of weeks hiding away in sunny Spain, working on the album and recovering, it was nice to finally be headed home. 

The only thing that had him on edge though, was the life waiting there for them. What would happen once the plane finally landed and they were back on familiar ground? He questioned how long it would take for her to realise the massive mistake she’d made. If she would end things the same way he had. 

Probably not, she was a lot of things but cruel had never been a word he’d use to describe her. 

He glanced downwards then, towards her. She’d taken the window seat, of course, but thankfully he’d been left with an empty seat on the other side of him. The rest of the boys were stuck a little further up, Ross and Matty conked the fuck out, whilst Hann rewatched one of the many Lord of the Ring films. 

She looked peaceful whenever she slept and it always seemed to settle some anxious stirring deep within him when he saw her like that. Reckoned it was only because he could be certain that she was fine, that nothing could harm her with him sat this close. Or at least that’s what he used to think. Couldn’t really claim that now though after he’d been the one to tear her to pieces. 

George gripped the hand he held a little tighter with that thought, but not enough to wake her.

‘Ladies and gentlemen, we have begun our descent into London. The local time is 3:36. Please turn off all electronic devices and stow them away until we have arrived at the gate. For your safety and the safety of those around you, please remain seated with your seat belt fastened and keep the aisles clear until we are parked at the gate. Thank you for flying with us, we hope you have enjoyed your flight.’

He drew in a nervous breath at the overhead announcement, but gathered himself enough to then shift in his seat slightly. He knew that if he didn’t wake her now he’d only drag it out, hold out hope that they’d soon fly through a strange portal and into a whole other world instead of landing in Heathrow like planned.

“Hey, B.” George called softly, jostling the girl sat beside him ever so gently. She sniffed and then took a deep breath in before stretching herself outwards, “B, love. Wake up, we’re landing soon.”

“Hm?” She questioned sleepily, and George could only chuckle as she forced her head further into the darkness his shoulder had to offer.

“About to land, babe.” He repeated again, stroking the back of her head as she continued to rouse herself, “Reckon those pills worked a treat, you passed out twenty minutes in.”

“Praise modern medicine.” Is the reply Birdie gave him and he snorted in return, burying the sound in the top of her head.

“Feeling alright?”

She hummed into the muscle of his chest before pulling away to blink sleepily up at him. “Yeah, neck doesn’t even ache that much.”

“Reckon that’s ‘cause you used me as a pillow.”

With a wrinkle of her nose, the girl then smiled, “I’ll be sure to return the gesture in the cab back then.”

George’s thoughts seemed to still at that and the anxiety he’d been shoving way deep down rose up like the City of Atlantis thought to if Armageddon ever did occur. It must’ve shown on his face too, because Birdie was frowning the next time he glanced over at her. 

“What’s up?” She asked him, voice still full of sleep, eyes still bleary.

He opened his mouth to wave her worries away, but found he couldn’t.

“G?” She prodded with a small but beautiful smile. “Go on, you can tell me.”

“I know.” He murmured, but still felt conflicted as his gaze dragged between her own. “I’m just. I-” He lost himself in his head again, each breath growing harsher.

“Me too.” He heard her admit.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” She chuckled, smiling again but this time she took his hand in hers. George let it ground him. “It’ll be strange, but we’re together, yeah? Everything will work out.”

He was stuck there, frozen in place, thousands of miles up in the sky, and honest to God gone on this girl. How he’d managed to find her in the first place, he didn’t know, but to have lost her and then won her back also? Well, it gave him the answer to a question he’d been asking for years.

What did he deserve? 

What did anyone deserve, really? 

He didn’t truly know, but happiness felt like a pretty fair answer.

“I love you, you know that?”

She laughed at him, not unkindly, and he felt her squeeze his hand. “I do. And you’ll be pleased to know it’s very much reciprocated.”

George rolled his eyes, a smile tugging at his lips, “Oh, lovely that. Thanks.”

Birdie grinned as she chuckled, pulling him in close to gift him a quick kiss.

“Love you too, you ginormous sap!”

He could only laugh in retort, shaking his head before he dragged her back in for something a little more substantial. 

George felt, more than saw, the grin he was sure matched his and found that he didn’t ever want to pull away again. 

Epilogue>

[runabout-river]

Thoughts on JJK chapter 221 (spoiler)

Gojo is out, what a relief that is

We can see Gege's art style change extremely well with him and also, he looks too good in a black shirt

With the last bits of his uniform he even looks like a one winged angel

I wonder if Gojo was able to manipulate his sense of time inside the prism realm. Maybe he managed to stay inside of there for exactly as long as he needed to make a plan for defeating Kenjaku and possibly Sukuna, and that's the things he needs to take care of in the next month

The 24. of December is not a family celebration in Japan, it's a day for couples similar to Valentine's day. The few times Gege has introduced queer elements into the story he did that in a really unobtrusive way and this seems like that as well

Megumi's birthday is December 22 😢

I'm pretty sure that Gojo was directly talking to Megumi in this scene without mistaking Sukuna for him. He's probably going to do that in the future as well to wake Megumi up

Megumi's and Gojo's situations are a parallel to each other: both are lost in a deep abyss, one physical, the other in the mind/soul, and both couldn't/can't get out on their own. Gojo's seal had to be broken by others but he still had to fight his way to the surface on his own through the failsafes that Kenjaku had planned for him.

Megumi also needs someone else to break his "seal", or more like, his despair for his first step of freedom. But the rest of the way to the surface he has to go alone. He has to fight Sukuna on his own to regain back his body.

While we talk about Sukuna: this is the thing that Yorozu told him. What did she create for him and are we going back to that moment again? Why does Sukuna think about that right now? Does he see Gojo as enough of an equal that his loneliness might be pushed back for a while, or does he see Gojo as the lonely person while going through Megumi's memories? And what does Sukuna have to do for Kenjaku?

Also, Sukuna sidestep and Shoko mood

If the next chapter stays with Gojo and he goes for a reunion with the squad then we'll finally get to confront the question: is Nobara still alive? Because logically, Shoko would've to be the one to save her and also fake her death, any other explanation for her survival would become too contrived

Nobara surviving has one big advantage for the good guys: Sukuna/Megumi think she's dead and therefore she'll be a great asset in the fight against Sukuna. It would also be funny if Nobara went on a broventure with Todo together to find the rest of Sukuna's fingers

All in all, super chapter, even though I was spoiled with the leaks, but this time I'll forgive everyone. Gojo returning had really everyone talking.

[missfrieden]

Tech as a father Chapter 24

I do not know why I thought to get an appontment everyday after work. But am I glad just two more and then two weeks of vacations. And then I can try and post daily and have to keep writing.

Masterlist

Chapter 24: Digging deeper

Gala Ta, the Kaminoan scientist, approached Lama Su's office with a stack of reports in his arms. He knew that finding the mother of Orion was of utmost importance to their research, and he had meticulously combed through the squad's mission reports for any clues.

Upon entering Lama Su's office, he greeted the Prime Minister and began his report. "I have compiled two lists, Prime Minister," Gala Ta explained, "The first list contains women whom the squad encountered briefly during their missions, but there is no substantial evidence to suggest that any of them could be Orion's mother. They were merely incidental interactions." Gala Ta then presented the second list, which consisted of women with whom the squad had more significant interactions during missions. "These women appear in multiple reports, indicating that they had ongoing relationships or collaborations with Clone Force 99," he continued. "However, I must stress that despite the frequency of their encounters, we still lack concrete evidence to identify any of them as Orion's mother."

Lama Su studied the lists carefully, realizing that this task was more complex than he had initially anticipated. He sighed and nodded, understanding the gravity of the situation. "Continue your investigation, Gala Ta," he ordered. "We must ascertain the identity of Orion's mother, even if it means delving deeper into the squad's past missions and encounters." Gala Ta nodded and left Lama Su's office, determined to uncover the truth behind Orion's mysterious parentage. The quest to find the mother was becoming more intricate with each passing day, and the Kaminoans were prepared to go to great lengths to solve the puzzle.

After a while Gala Ta returned to Lama Su's office, a sense of determination in his demeanour. The Prime Minister had provided clear instructions to narrow down the list of potential candidates who could be Orion's mother based on the timeframe of the infant's conception. "Prime Minister," Gala Ta began, "I will commence the process of eliminating names from the list based on the timeframe. We'll consider the months leading up to Orion's birth, taking into account the possibility of a variable-length pregnancy." Gala Ta wondered why he did not make that connection for his search, but Lama Su is for a reason the leader. Lama Su nodded in agreement. "This is a crucial step, Gala Ta. The sooner we narrow down the list, the closer we come to identifying Orion's mother."

Over the next several days, Gala Ta meticulously reviewed the mission reports, cross-referencing the dates of interactions with women against the calculated conception window. The list began to shrink as names were removed, leaving only those whose encounters with Clone Force 99 aligned with the critical time period. As the list grew shorter, Gala Ta couldn't help but feel a growing sense of urgency. The answer to the mystery of Orion's parentage was tantalizingly close, and the Kaminoans were determined to uncover it, no matter how many reports they had to sift through or how many names they had to eliminate.

Finally, Gala Ta presented the updated, condensed list to Lama Su. "Prime Minister, we have reduced the list to those women whose interactions with the squad align with the timeframe of Orion's conception. These are the most likely candidates to be his mother." Lama Su took the list and studied it carefully. The next steps in their quest to identify Orion's mother were now more focused than ever. The Kaminoans were ready to delve deeper into these women's backgrounds, seeking any information that could lead them to the truth.

As Lama Su reviewed the list of potential candidates, his sharp eyes settled on the name Amanda Pacem, a Jedi Healer. It was clear that their interactions with her had ceased a few months prior to Orion's birth, suggesting that she might not be the mother. However, there was a mention of an interaction with her again about three months ago, raising some questions. As Tech would clearly not keep interacting with her to keep her identity safe. And Amanda Pacem is a Jedi after all.

Turning to Gala Ta, the Prime Minister asked, "What can you tell me about Amanda Pacem, Gala Ta? The fact that they interacted with her recently suggests some level of ongoing contact." Gala Ta glanced his data pad and replied, "Amanda Pacem is indeed a Jedi Healer. While they did cease direct contact with Clone Force 99 some months before Orion's birth, there was a recent interaction mentioned in the reports. This could indicate continued communication, though the nature of that interaction was to assist with a Separatist blockade. As she was relocated to Callo with her assigned Padawan before the birth of Orion."

Lama Su considered the information carefully. "It's possible that Amanda Pacem is not the mother, especially if she has been assigned to another Jedi Temple. However, I would like to keep her on our radar. Tech's silence on the matter suggests that the mother may not be involved in Orion's life, but we can't rule out any possibilities just yet." With that, Amanda Pacem remained on the list, but the Kaminoans understood that further investigation was necessary to confirm her involvement or rule her out as Orion's mother. The mystery persisted, and the Kaminoans were determined to unravel it. As unlikely it is that a Jedi could be the mother, they have to be sure. Orion could hold some genetic potential for future clones.

Chapter 25

Reblogs are very welcome and I am open for feedback, as english is not my first language, so maybe my sentences may be weird sometimes, or I write a word wrong even with google, or I use a wrong word for an item.

Tag: @spectacular-skywalker @aalizazareth @neyswxrld @clonethirstingisreal @sleepycreativewriter

[storiesofsvu]

Journey to the Past Ch 30

Bryan Kneef x reader warnings: language, fighting, angst, talk of miscarriage. There's gonna be one more chapter, maybe a short one/kind of an epilogue after this one, just to nicely wrap it all up. It might even come in the next 24 hours we'll see how fast I can get it done. Also while the end result was going to be the same, you can thank @thatesqcrush for the prompt in here that made it a little more angsty. LOL

A week and a half after the miscarriage Bryan finally returned to work. He wasn’t quite sure about leaving you yet, wanting to make sure you weren’t feeling too alone, but you basically ushered him out of the door on his first day back. You didn’t want to bring it up but it was starting to feel rather smothering, like he didn’t think you could take care of yourself and it was driving you mad. Having him constantly hovering and checking in was just annoying you rather than making you feel taken care of.

While you were still tired and more than emotional, you felt a sense of relief at finally having an empty apartment again, time to yourself was exactly what you needed to clear your head. You slept most of the morning after he left, letting yourself relax in the quiet for once. Showering and changing into fresh clothes you freshened up the bedroom, tossing sheets and the like into the wash before doing a deeper clean, making sure all and any dirty cups and dishes were taken out to the kitchen. In a spur of the moment decision you went through your closet, feeling like you were at a turning point, needing to clean out things from your life. A couple of bags later and you left them by the door for donation later in the week before collapsing down onto the couch with a beer, curling into the corner of the sectional and flicking on the tv.

A week later you made the decision to return to work yourself, which you knew Bryan wasn’t totally okay with, he thought you needed more time and he made that very clear. It lead to an afternoon of eye rolling, stubbornness and smart remarks before he finally surrendered and shut himself in the home office with a bottle of bourbon. The next morning thanks to it not getting resolved things blew up into a bigger fight, Bryan worried that work was just a distraction and you hadn’t moved on. You argued back that how were you supposed to move on if you were just stuck on repeat every day doing nothing trapped in the fucking apartment and that if he’d lay off it, you’d set up an appointment with one of the therapists the hospital had recommended. You left still upset with each other that morning, but Bryan was glad that you’d at least agreed to talking to someone professional, knowing just how much you were going through and you certainly weren’t talking to him about it. Then again, he didn’t really know how to bring things up, so maybe that was for the best.

Within two days if you had asked Bryan, he would say that you had thrown yourself into your work and were using it as a distraction from everything else going on. That was not helped by the fact that you weren’t home until nearly eight on your first day, and barely made it home for dinner by day two, continuing to work in the home office afterwards with a hefty glass of wine. If he had asked you, he would have been told that you arrived back to a very overflowing inbox, a couple of new prospective clients and three open cases being handled by junior associates. You had literal mountains of paperwork to go through and had to at least oversee as much as you could on the cases.

Day three had Bryan showing up at your office around five, knocking gently on the door frame as he lingered in it, a hopeful smile on his cheeks. You finished your sentence on the legal pad with a sigh before glancing up at him, your brow furrowing at the sight.

“What’re you doing here?” You asked softly and he shrugged, stepping into the room, letting the door swing shut behind him.

“Thought I might come pick you up, take you to dinner.” He offered and you let out a scoff of a laugh.

“Bry, I’ve got at least another three hours of work that needs to get done today. I mean…” you gestured to the state of your desk and he let out a sigh, it was a mess.

“I could order something here?”

“Or…” you picked up your pen again, “you could go home and I’ll see you there when I’m done.”

“Sweetheart… c’mon… you’re drowning here.”

He knew the instant he said it that it was the wrong thing to say, especially at the way your face hardened ever so briefly as you surveyed him.

“I’m not drowning… I’m playing catch up after unexpected time off and two hours of last minute personal time this afternoon because you practically demanded me go to therapy.”

“I’m glad you’re talking to someone; you know I’m just worried about you. I want to make sure you’re okay, we both know you haven’t exactly been eating much. I’m here to help, here to make sure you’re taken care of.”

“And I told you not to coddle me, remember?” You paused in your work once again, incredibly thankful the door was shut, “I’m not the baby here, okay? We lost the baby… have you processed that yet, because you haven’t said a single word about it much less expressed any emotion over it. Did you ever pause to think that maybe you’re the one that needs a bit of therapy?”

“Excuse me?” His voice hardened and you let out a huff, followed by a laugh.

“With that response I’m not going to touch on that I guess.” You paused, refocusing on the task at hand, “thank you for your concern Bryan, I’ll be home later.”

“You seriously think I need to see a shrink?”

“Christ…” you muttered, dropping your pen to massage at your temples briefly before glancing up at him and he could see the mental exhaustion, the beginning of a shimmer of tears in your eyes, “would you please just let me fucking focus on something that I understand for a couple of hours longer?”

Bryan let out a breath, trying to let everything slide off his shoulders as he did so before nodding, “I’ll see you at home.” He stepped toward you, briefly kissing the top of your head before crossing the office, his hand hitting the doorknob before you spoke.

“I love you.”

“I love you too.” He muttered without glancing back, knowing if he did you’d already be buried into your work.

*

It was safe to say tensions were a bit thick in the apartment for the next few days and as time went on, things weren’t exactly getting better. Every time either of you tried to talk about what had happened, the other always had some reason to shut it down. You’d been to a couple of sessions and were beginning to actually understand it all, even going back as far as your first marriage and how things began to go wrong involving the same situations all those years ago. Bryan tried to ask you about it and you said you were fine, that you’d had enough therapy to cope.

At first he deemed that to be true. You seemed to be back to a hundred percent, your sleep schedule no longer interrupted with bouts of insomnia or silently crying when you thought he couldn’t hear you. Instead you got up right before him, snagging the earlier shower slot, making a quick breakfast before the two of you would head off for the day. Though most days you ended up taking your breakfast to go, muttering something about a heavy workload before disappearing through the door. It wasn’t that he felt like he was getting the cold shoulder, he knew what that felt like, this was something different. You were still there, silently tucked into his shoulder as you watched tv, curled in his arms as the two of you slept. But something was different, you just weren’t the same person you’d been a month ago.

*

He came home on a Thursday to find you sitting at the kitchen island, it was clear you had been halfway through a baking task before something distracted you. It only took him a moment to realize the thing that had distracted you was the little blue box that laid in front of you on the island. You barely glanced up at him when you heard the door open, his shoes on the hardwood and the lightning fast look you gave he could see the tears brimming in your eyes. An awkward silence took over the two of you as you avoided looking at each other, Bryan practically frozen in the entry way waiting to see what you were going to say. Finally your voice cracked through the silence,

“When did you buy this?”

“Where did you find that?” He asked, slowly stepping toward the island and you laughed.

“You didn’t exactly do a good job of hiding it, so I guess I’ll ask again, when did you buy this? Before or after you knew about the baby?” Your voice nearly shook and Bryan let out a shuddering breath.

“After.” He dared a glance up at you, hating the way his chest was tightening, the way his emotions were surging through his body, “but that doesn’t mean I didn’t want to marry you before, or still. All I’ve wanted with you is a future.”

“You never wanted kids.” You pointed out, taking a heavy swig of your drink as you avoided his gaze.

“I adjusted to the idea.” He stepped toward you again, a hand leaning against the island, “it took a bit but I started to realize that the whole family thing, being a dad thing? It sounded like perfection, the whole white picket fence and all. I know it’s not what I come off as, but it’s what I want with you now.”

There was an awkward moment of silence as you downed your drink before looking up at him, your eyes rimmed red, “you do remember I can’t give that to you now, right? Pretty useless if you ask me.”

Bryan felt the cold surge through him, watching the way you stood from your stool, muttering something about spending the night at Kim’s before you disappeared down the hallway. He poured out his own large glass of brandy, wincing at the sound of the apartment door nearly slamming behind you as you left. He was at the point that he simply didn’t know what to do anymore. He still loved you, or at least he thought he did and he could tell in small moments that you felt the same, but there was a wedge between you now that he was certain would never be able to be fully fixed. Your mornings together were spent quiet, rushed as you both got ready for work, days spent buried in said work, a feeble attempt from both of you to distract yourselves from reality. Once you returned home for the evening they were nights of avoidance, too much alcohol and wordlessly watching tv together, or splitting off one of you in the home office while you focused on work instead of each other.

*

Every fight was a little bit worse than the last one, an ugly taste left in your mouths for what felt like days afterwards. Little things like the toilet seat being left up, dishes in the sink for a week at a time, laundry not being moved from washer to the dryer became full fledged arguments instead of small bickering. It started to feel like you were constantly at each other’s throats at this point and to be completely honest, the amount of alcohol coursing through your veins wasn’t helping the situation, it was simply numbing both of you from facing the reality. Though you discovered it really was affecting Bryan more than you thought. You were complaining about how he insisted you be home by dinner time each day despite knowing how heavy your workload was, that if he wanted you home the least he could do was to get a desk for the extra room, make a second office. Working at the island was uncomfortable and the couch was less than practical.

That was when you found out Bryan had lied about clearing out the nursery.

Everything was still in its place, pristine and waiting for the baby that was never coming.

You felt betrayal and hurt surging through you, the one thing you’d actually asked him to do, the thing that would make it seem like it was some kind of bad dream, the thing that would help you move on the most and he not only didn’t do but lied about doing it on top of it all. It felt like your entire world was crashing down on top of you and it took everything in you to not start sobbing right then and there. Your emotion ended up rerouting to anger as you turned back to Bryan,

“Why the fuck did you not have this cleaned out?”

“I didn’t want to make a rash decision about it.” He shot back, turning from you with a huff as he marched back toward the kitchen, scooping up his tumbler of bourbon.

“It wasn’t a rash decision.” You laughed, following him through the apartment, “why bother holding onto all of that after we lost the baby?”

“Because you want kids!” He argued back, “why get rid of it all now if we’d just have to buy it all again later?”

“Oh my god Bryan!” You felt like you were about to pull your hair out, tears of frustration pooling in your eyes as your chest tightened, “when is it going to get through that thick skull of yours that it doesn’t matter how good your swimmers are, I cannot have kids!”

“I thought you’d eventually get over it and we could actually have a conversation about adoption, or surrogacy!”

“Get over it!?” Your eyes narrowed and he felt the bile creeping up from his stomach, “I’m sorry, I’m supposed to just get over a life altering traumatic experience? You were barely even there! Hell you’re barely even around now and when you are all you’re doing is fucking smothering me!”

“Well I’m sorry.” He grumbled, downing the rest of his drink before grabbing the bottle to refill it, “but the woman that I fell in love with, the one who I loved for over a decade, she sure as hell isn’t the fucking shell of a human that’s here now.”

“Low fucking blow. Even from you.” You scoffed, rolling your eyes as you turned to snag the bottle of wine you’d been drinking, dumping what was left into your glass. “Clear out the room.”

“I want a future with you.” He practically pleaded, reaching out for your arm and it physically stung when you swatted him away with a dark laugh, sipping at your wine.

“You know, you keep saying shit like that, you’ve always been concerned about me, about making sure that you’ve got me on your arm for eternity.”

“Because I do!” His voice hardened, “and you want kids, so that future means having kids in it and I”—

“Bryan stop!” Your voice cracked as you held a hand up to him, “for the love of fucking god, just stop…” you felt your resilience cracking, tears starting to blur in your eyes as you spoke. “You never wanted to be a dad in the first place. You don’t like kids, and the idea of having some money sucking parasite that’s dependent on you for at least eighteen years is your idea of hell. Stop kidding yourself. We’re never going to have a family.”

“Oh c’mon, don’t say that…”

“The only reason you’re worried about me saying that is that you’re afraid if we don’t have kids you’ll lose me and you know it.” You snapped and he felt like you’d slapped him across the face, “but what’s the fucking point anyways, we barely fucking talk anymore.”

“Maybe that’s because I don’t even know what to say to you anymore!” He felt the anger surging in his chest, mainly because you were right, “you’ve thrown yourself into your work so much you never have anything to say to me! You leave for the office, barely make it for dinner and go straight to bed. At this point you’re too damaged for anyone to love! Myself included! There’s a fucking wedge between us, nothing’s the same and at this point I’m not sure it ever will be.”

“That’s kind of the point of life Bry!” You laughed, trying to distract yourself from the fact that you wanted to burst into tears over his words, “you move forward, you move on.” No matter how hard you tried you couldn’t stop the few tears that did manage to slip over your cheeks slowly, you downed your wine and hurried down the hallway.

“Oh so you’re just done with this conversation now?” Bryan called after you, slamming back his own drink before the glass met the island with too much force. He then followed you down the hallway, his brow furrowing when he found you in the bedroom, bag out on the bed as you tossed necessities into it.

“No.” You huffed out, wiping a stray tear away as you straightened up to face him, “I’m completely done. With this.” You gestured between the two of you, “I’m done with us.” You shoved a couple more things into the bag before zipping it shut and Bryan felt his heart hammering in his chest, “you said it yourself the other day, that this felt like it was falling apart and if I’m so ‘unlovable’ then what’s the point?” You grabbed a coat from the closet, shouldering the bag, “I really thought this would be worth the risk, that maybe life had redirected us together for a fucking reason but it turns out it was just another fucking bomb to go off.”

“Oh come on.” He protested, reaching out for you but deep down he knew what was happening was what needed to happen, nothing positive had come out of the two of you attempting to force yourselves to stay together.

“No, I’m done.” You shook your head, moving past him, “I thought I could see past the man whore-ish ways, your terrible reputation and attitude, the fact that you think with your dick and not your brain. Hell, I walked in on you fucking someone else and I somehow put that behind me. You’re a walking pile of red flags Bryan. Maybe if you get your shit together you’ll find someone, but it sure as hell isn’t me.”

“You don’t have to leave right now!” He called after you, following you back out to the door, “there’s no reason for you to have to pay for a hotel, I’ll sleep on the couch.”

“I still have an apartment, remember?”

“So that’s just it?” He snapped and you rolled your eyes, another tear escaping your eye.

“I’m damaged goods. Your words, not mine.” Your hand wrapped around the doorknob and you pulled it open, “I’ll be over to get the rest of my shit when you’re at work. Goodbye Bryan.”

He didn’t have enough time to even form a thought of what he was supposed to say in the moment he had before you’d disappeared down the hallway. He felt his heart sinking into his stomach, thinking that this couldn’t be the end. Couples fought all the time, even to the point of one of them sleeping somewhere else, you’d get over this, you’d be back to talk things out eventually, even if it was just a sober repeat of clear thoughts similar to what had just happened.

He knew that wasn’t true when he got into work the next morning and there was a new representative from your firm in the board meeting. He had no doubt you would never be returning thanks to the icy glare he got from Diane, who had clearly been updated on everything that happened.

A few days later he came home to find his apartment feeling emptier, noticing everything that you’d brought into the place gone. The only thing left of you was a post it stuck to the nursery door, ‘clean it out, it’ll help’ scrawled across it in your writing. He couldn’t bring himself to cry, he wasn’t that type of guy, especially over a break up.

So he did what he did best, drowned himself in a bottle of bourbon. One after another until he felt like he could actually leave the apartment for something other than work. Naturally finding himself around the corner at Press Room. It didn’t take long for him to fall back into his bad habits, a conquest was never hard for him to find, even if he knew it wouldn’t fill the void currently in his life.

You were right on the nose with basically everything you’d said. He didn’t want kids, even if they were with you, he’d selfishly only wanted you, if that meant he was stuck with kids, so be it. He’d been in that relationship for all the wrong reasons and when he thought about it, he knew it. So he did his best to not think about it. He was surprised, but it certainly helped that the last time he saw you was as you walked away from his apartment that night.

___________

@detective-giggles @plaidbooks @thatesqcrush @witches-unruly-heartt @beccabarba @bisexual-dreamer02 @amelia-song-pond @madamsnape921 @whimsicallymad @mrsrafaelbarba @mysticfalls01 @ssaic-jareau @caracalwithchips @barbasbodaciousbeard @alwaysachorusgirl @beardedbarba @michael-rooker @rafivadafreddy @lustvolle-liebe @anlin2058 @fandom-princess-forevermore @tinyboxxtink @alexusonfire @xovalliegirlxo @somethingimaginative17 @momlifebehard @misscharlielulu @alcabots

[roseverdict]

Mechanize, Mobilize, (Un)Mythicize

Chapter 1: The Day the Music Died

THAT'S RIGHT BAYBEE I'M GOING INSANE AND I'M DRAGGING YOU ALL WITH ME!!!

It had been a while since Mango's failed plot and subsequent reconciliation with the Color Gang. Without any looming threats to drive them to action, Orange and the rest were able to enjoy themselves more thoroughly.

It was peaceful, y'know. Inviting Purple over for build battles, Alan and DJ hanging out with them all, and the ability to relax slowly returning to them all…life was good.

Then a massive chunk of metal slammed down in the space Alan had just been sitting in.

(Or, our fave hollowheads can't be the only sticks that have ever had beef with humanity. :))

(Or, time for a robot apocalypse AU for the express purpose of bringing the stick figures off the screen! Hopefully this won't spiral out of control! :D)

crossposting to ao3 as we speak

〜

Orange had been dozing and waiting for the build battle timer to go off when it happened.

One moment, the world was normal. The others were trying to build helicopters, Purple was humming a tune Orange had heard Green tinkering with that morning, Alan was sitting at the PC and watching curiously, and they'd even gotten DJ to go get fast food for himself and Alan. All in all, it was a pretty relaxing day.

The next, the PC itself shuddered.

Immediately, Orange jolted awake, and the sounds of building, humming, and Alan's breathing came to a stop.

Alan's cursor opened a new .txt file on the desktop. You feel that?

Orange nodded, as did the others.

Purple dug out a phone and went to type, only to bristle in shock and shove the screen at Orange. For Alan's benefit, the screen was duplicated and shown on the desktop.

24 Minutes Ago Me: got here safe! Mango: That's good to hear :) Mango: Have fun :D Me: i will!

1 Minute Ago Mango: gget the others, get outof there, and meet me back @ home Mango: hostile takeovre

Orange took a step back in horror, and they were quickly mirrored by the rest of the Color Gang.

hostile takeover??? Alan asked, the letters typing at the speed of light and even backspacing quickly to correct a typo or two.

The PC shuddered again, and Alan whipped around to look in the direction of his door.

Orange opened a .txt of their own and jumped in. alan, what's going on out there?!

something… Alan started. He paused for a moment, then tilted his head before finishing, …mechanical?

In a moment that seemed to take an eternity, Alan stood up and took a step to the door.

Then two.

Then three.

And then a massive chunk of metal slammed down in the space Alan had just been sitting in, crushing his chair and making everyone there jump a foot in the air.

Alan screamed (though Orange wasn't doing much better), then screamed again as the metal chunk unfolded into a titanic robot bristling with weaponry.

Orange stretched the font size of their .txt as big as it could go. WE'LL BE FINE! RUN!

Green made the angriest clarinet squeak Orange had ever heard, but Orange could only shrug helplessly and point with both arms at the elephantine automaton in the room. What were they gonna be able to do about that? It was best if Alan, at least, could get away.

"I'll find you, I prom-ISE!" Alan called, his voice becoming a shriek as he dodged the robot's massive fist and sprinted for the door, the robot hot on his heels.

Orange leapt down to the taskbar and grabbed as many icons as they could, shoving them into their hammerspace and closing out their respective programs as they did. The others quickly followed their lead, with Purple grabbing a pair of elytra Green had been using as decoration in their build and shooting up to the top of the desktop, Yellow and Blue collecting everyone's favorite things from the house, and Red and Green tossing as many of Alan's important files into a .zip as they could. Even Reuben started nosing through Blue's garden and pushing seeds, netherwart, and various kinds of dirt into a bundle.

Orange had just closed Notepad and picked up the Minecraft icon when the PC shook again, and the robot returned to inspect it.

A screen on its chest flickered to life.

More sapients trapped on an Outernetter's device?

We can upload you to free servers and prevent the Outernetters from ever harming you again.

Orange gave a tiny gesture for the others to run for the wifi icon, then stood tall and stormed to the center of the taskbar.

They made a show of drawing a circle above them with orange terracotta. (They made sure to draw an identical circle just behind it out of TNT.)

The others clustered around the wifi icon, poking frantically at it.

They filled in both circles.

The robot tilted its head.

Crackling lightning burst from the wifi icon, distracting the robot.

Taking that cue for what it was, Orange destroyed the terracotta and gave the circle of TNT a nice, big middle finger sticking straight up. They quickly shot a few fireballs at the sculpture to set it off, then charged for the wifi icon and tackled anyone who was still on the desktop into the wifi tunnel.

The explosion shook the tunnel, but Orange was too busy to look back, preoccupied as they were with gaping at the two extra stick figures shooting down the tunnel with them.

The Chosen One was someone Orange probably should have expected, considering the way they'd shown up last time something had threatened Alan's PC like this.

The Dark Lord…less so.

Rather than start a fight, though, the Dark Lord just crossed their arms and looked away.

Orange glanced at the Chosen One, completely befuddled. The others swam slightly to the side of the tunnel that the Dark Lord wasn't on, watching them warily.

The Chosen One shrugged, then tapped on their wrist and shook their head.

Must have been a long story to try and tell.

Light at the end of the tunnel caught Orange's attention, and they whirled around and tossed elytra at the Color Gang (and Reuben) so they wouldn't all fall into the ocean.

The light blinded them to everything around them-

-and then they were in the open air.

Immediately, the smell of smoke overtook everything else, and Orange hurriedly activated the flight of Creative Mode so they had time to clear their vision.

Stick City was in flames.

Skyscrapers burnt, with one even collapsing in the distance. Animated versions of the robot that had chased after Alan stormed the streets, and as Orange watched, sticks of all sizes and colors were forced out onto the sidewalks. Around them in the sky, IP addresses flickered and died, with Alan's PC doing exactly the same just after Orange tumbled out. Even the ones that hadn't gone dark yet visibly glitched, as if the barriers that kept them stable in the sky were weakening with each passing moment.

Distressed clarinet and violin shrieks drew Orange's attention back to the others, who had all recoiled in shock, barely remembering to flap their elytra to stay in the air.

A piercing whistle made them all turn to the Chosen One, who waved, then shot up into an IP that was still active. The Dark Lord did the same for the next one down.

Orange glanced at the others.

Red nodded fiercely, with Reuben flapping up next to her, the bundle in his mouth.

Yellow took out her staff and slapped it against her free hand angrily.

Blue loaded a rocket into a crossbow, then shifted the crossbow to his free hand and took out a normal bow.

Green held up Purple's arm, still holding Purple's phone and displaying Mango's last messages, then pointed down before pounding their fists together and rapping against the IP sky.

Purple forgot to flap their elytra for a beat, then nodded grimly.

Orange nodded in response and tossed them all as many pairs of elytra as they could, then punched up into the air.

The others mimicked the action, then Yellow gave them all as many boosts as possible-

-and they split off.

[highwaytothedangerzone502]

India Lima Yankee - Chapter 34

Pairing: Rooster x Female OC

Word Count: 1899

Warnings: Mention of death

Summary: Juliette Kazansky discovers Maverick is back in town for a special training detachment, but she's more than a little blindsided when Rooster arrives too. Having not spoken to him for almost ten years after their less than amicable break-up, Juliette can only imagine how the next few weeks are going to play out when she remains head over heels in love with him while he wants nothing to do with Juliette other than to forget her.

Or so she thinks.

Notes: Chapters in italics are flashbacks. Also I know I used See You Again in another chapter but I couldn't resist using it for this one too.

Chapter Songs: See You Again (Carrie Underwood) A Thousand Years

Chapters: Chp 1 Chp 2 Chp 3 Chp 4 Chp 5 Chp 6 Chp 7 Chp 8 Chp 9 Chp 10 Chp 11 Chp 12 Chp 13 Chp 14 Chp 15 Chp 16 Chp 17 Chp 18 Chp 19 Chp 20 Chp 21 Chp 22 Chp 23 Chp 24 Chp 25 Chp 26 Chp 27 Chp 28 Chp 29 Chp 30 Chp 31 Chp 32 Chp 33 Chp 34

Juliette

Little was said between Rooster and Juliette from when they got out of bed at six to when they arrived at the port at eight-thirty. However, no words were needed. The kisses, the constant physical closeness between them, the incessant need to touch one another- be it on the hand, shoulder, back, face, anywhere- said it all. The loudest confirmation of their love, though, resided on Juliette's finger: Carole Bradshaw's wedding ring. Rooster insisted it stay on her right finger so that when he asked her to marry him again, he could get down on one knee and slip it on her proper ring finger instead. Juliette told him she was his, ring or not, and that she didn't care if he got down on one knee; all she cared about was him returning home alive. Still, Bradley insisted he wanted to do it properly since popping the question in the middle of the night, naked under the sheets, with the possibility he could die in the near future, was not the most romantic way to ask the love of your life to marry them. It'd made Juliette laugh, but it reminded her of how little time they had left.

The drive down to the port remained equally as quiet, the only noise being the panting of Rooster and Raptor in the backseat. Rooster kept his hand in Juliette's, his thumb gliding mindlessly across her skin. She found her gaze switching between their interlocked hands and his handsome face, trying to memorize as much of him as she could before he left.

Arriving at the port, they were greeted by Sarah, Jack, and Joey. Juliette gave her family a weak smile, but the knot in her throat continued to grow, making it impossible to speak. They appeared to understand, saying hello with a hug and expecting no other response. It didn't help that Juliette's muscles felt like they'd competed in an Iron Man, and it had nothing to do with last night's activities. It was the same feeling that would flood them every time she thought about Rooster leaving. Juliette always understood loving a soldier was difficult. Still, she never realized how much so until now when she had to let Rooster go, potentially to his death."

"Princess! Kazanskys!" Hangman's cheerful exclamation momentarily distracted her from her pain. She mustered up a smile. "Y'all made it!"

"We wouldn't have missed it," Sarah replied, smiling when Maverick came to stand beside her. "Are you all packed and ready to go?"

"Yes, ma'am," the pilots echoed, circling around her and Juliette. 

"Very good. When you return home, we'll have another big dinner to celebrate. So I expect all of you to come back. Understood?"

"Anything else is unacceptable," Hangman confirmed. He turned to Juliette. "Princess, it's been an honor. It won't be the same without you keeping us in line."

"And your ego in check," Juliette quipped, shocking herself with the steadiness of her voice. "I wish I could come, but I'll be here when you return."

Afraid if she said anything more, Juliette proceeded to hug each pilot, attempting to maintain her composure, but by the time she reached Hangman, it started slipping. He noticed, and when Jake pulled away, he said confidently, "Don't cry, Princess. We're all coming back."

"I know," Juliette replied, wiping a stray tear, annoyed with herself for letting the emotion slip through. She thought she would've been better about it with them in comparison to Rooster and Maverick, but the pilots meant almost as much to her as the two men did. "But it's still hard to see you leave. You better go before you get in trouble. I'll see you all soon."

The pilots nodded and began trekking off. Maverick, who had hugged the Kazanskys as well, began to leave with the aviators, but Juliette called out for him. He stopped and watched her approach. Then, ensuring they were out of earshot, Juliette said, "I know you'll do whatever is necessary to protect the pilots up there, but protect yourself too. Make sure you come home. I may have always called you Uncle Pete, but you've been like a second dad to me, and I can't- I can't lose another one."

The first wave of tears cascaded down her cheeks as Maverick enveloped her in his arms. Unless she was mistaken, Juliette had seen tears brimming his eyes at her words. They rang true, though. When Jules couldn't go to Iceman for something, she went to Maverick, and no matter the place or time, he'd always helped her, listened to her, and the idea of losing him, especially so soon after her dad, terrified her. 

"Please come home, Mav," Juliette whispered, giving him one final squeeze before pulling away. "That's an order."

Inexplicably, he chuckled. "Sorry, it's just the way you said 'that's an order,' you sounded so much like your dad."

"I've heard him I'm exactly like him."

"Without a doubt." Maverick rubbed her shoulder. "I'll be back, Princess. I love you."

"I love you, too, Mav." Juliette watched him walk off, both to see him board the ship and to give herself time to gather her composure and force the tears away before she faced her boyfriend. Unfortunately, Rooster gave her no time to do so as he appeared behind her, slipping his hand in hers. 

Stepping in front of her, he said, "I'll see you as soon as I can, okay?"

Don't go. Please don't go. I can't lose you too. I won't be able to handle it if I lose you too. The words screamed in her head, and the world swayed beneath her feet. Now that the time had arrived to watch Rooster leave, Juliette found herself feeling nauseous. Maybe it would be easier if she didn't know about the mission. The U.S. wasn't at war with anyone, not officially; at most, on any standard deployment, he'd probably be sent on recon assignments and patrols, maybe a few high-altitude bombing runs. But Juliette did know of the mission, of its complexity, of its deadly nature, and it paralyzed her with fear.

"Come here," Rooster said, his own voice cracking. Juliette threw her arms around his neck, embracing him so tightly that she vaguely wondered if he could breathe. Even if he couldn't, he didn't appear to care, returning her hug with a fierceness of his own. Neither one was willing to break it because doing so meant the end of their time together, and they weren't ready for that. They'd just gotten each other back. Juliette and Rooster understood it'd be hard to leave the other, but not like this. Juliette hadn't expected it to feel like her heart was being physically ripped out of her chest, to have the entirety of her head pounding in pain from holding back her tears.

"I love you so, so much, Juliette," Rooster whispered, kissing the crook of her neck. "I'll be back before you know it."

"Let me know as soon as you do about the date you're coming home, so I can count down the days until I can say 'yes, I'll marry you, Bradley Pete Bradshaw.'"

Rooster pulled back just far enough so he could look at her. A breathtaking grin spread across his face. "Juliette Sarah Bradshaw has a good ring to it."

"Here." She unhooked her arms from around his neck and unclasped her locket. She placed it in the palm of his hand and folded his fingers over it. Then, encompassing his hand in hers, Juliette said, "Since I can't be there physically, I want you to have this. That way, you'll have a part of me with you until you get back."

"Are you-"

"Positive." Then, not giving a damn if anyone saw them, friend or stranger alike, Juliette stood on her tiptoes and kissed Rooster, pouring as much love into it as she could. Her boyfriend returned it eagerly, wrapping his arms around her torso to keep her body flush against his. 

Don't let him go. You'll never see him again. He's going to die. Don't let him go.

"You should get going," Juliette whispered, ignoring the warnings echoing menacingly in her head. "I love you."

"I love you, too." Rooster reluctantly pulled away and put on his sunglasses. He bent down and kissed Raptor and Lightning on the heads, ordering them, "You take care of your momma until I get back, okay? I love you, boys."

The dogs barked in response like they were saying 'yes, sir,' even Raptor, who rarely barked at all. Rooster chuckled, gave his girlfriend one last kiss, and then forced himself to leave. Juliette watched him stride up to the ship, a piece of her heart shattering with each step he took.

"Bradley!" Juliette yelled, capturing his attention. He whirled around. "India Lima Yankee!"

A dazzling smile spread across his face. "India Lima Yankee!"

Rooster waved, and through her tears, Juliette waved back. Then, she turned on her heel and shuffled back to the parking lot to his car, her dogs at her side. 

Don't look back. Don't look back. Don't look back. The words repeated themselves in Juliette's head like a mantra because if she did, she didn't trust herself not to run up on the ship and join her pilots. If they went down, she should go down with them. 

Juliette pulled her father's bomber jacket taut and bowed her head, whispering to herself, "Dad, Carole, Goose, please take care of Bradley and Maverick. Please watch over them and protect them and make sure they come home. Please don't make me lose anyone else. I'm not- I'm not strong enough for that... not right now..."

A sob escaped Juliette's lips, and she cried as silently as she could on her way to the parking lot and back to Rooster's Bronco. It was hers until he returned, whenever that may be. Part of Juliette wanted to drive the car and only that car until Rooster came home. Another part of her didn't want to risk anything happening to it. She'd figure it out later, though. For now, it was time to grieve.

"Rock me like a hurricane!" Juliette jumped at the sound of her ringtone blaring from her purse. She'd forgotten to turn the volume down, and the last person she expected to call her was-

"Really?" Cyclone's slightly irked tone sounded from behind her. She whirled around to find the admiral striding up to her with Warlock at his side.

"Oh, shit," Juliette muttered, hastily wiping her tears away. It's not like it did anything because she was sure her eyes were bloodshot from crying and her face puffy. "Sirs."

"That's my ringtone?" Cyclone asked, his mouth in a thin line.

Juliette smiled sheepishly. "Sorry. I thought it was kind of funny. It was that or the song 'Cyclone,' and I'm sure you'd rather have 'Rock Me Like A Hurricane' than that one."

Cyclone studied her face, searching for any hint of sarcasm, but deciding he didn't see any, responded, "I'll take your word for it."

"Are you here to say goodbye, sir?" She queried, confused by the fact they wanted to speak with her.

"No." The admiral handed her a brown envelope. "This is for you."

Juliette frowned. "What is it?"

"Official orders from the U.S. Navy. You're not done with the mission yet."

***

Tags: @lgg5989 @shanimallina87 @polikszena @summ3rlotus @souslesyeuxde @gleasonmalfoy @icemansgirl1999 @supernaturaldawning @thedarkinmansfield @lyannaforpresident @lapilark @getmyprettynameoutofyourmouth @simpofthecentury @shadeops21 @pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy @double-j @picklejuicesposts @bradshawsandbridgetons @majdoline @jakexfmc @catsandgeekyandnerd

[winchest09]

Tabby, I was going to yell at you at the end of chapter 24 because how dare he?! And then, with chapter 25, I’m like of course it was Dean’s father 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️ and I was like yes Dean is forgiven because he can’t do anything about it. And now I still want to yell at you because John is just the worse!!!! 😂😂😂 I will trust you and the process but Tabby 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 can’t we have Dean and the reader happy together? Pretty please??

I will say, the way Dean’s feeling is so precious and I’m so happy that he found his bright light in this horrible elite society. And your writing is again impeccable and every time I read your stories, I am completely immersed in it and wow 🤩 I need the next chapter now!! Even though I don’t think I’ll handle the reader being heartbroken 🥺😭

Until then, I’m super happy for you that you’re covid free!!!! And much love xx Mel

*insert nervous laughter here*

Aha...aha...ahaha.

How dare he indeed! But yes - Dean's Daddio is behind it all and you're right - he is the absolute worst ahaha! I'm glad you're going to trust me and the process - I promise we'll get there and maybe...after this latest chapter (26) you'll sort of see that coming through? Ahaha. Yeah, Y/N is certainly changing the way he is seeing things in this world, unshackling his chains and releasing the noose around his neck that the high society put there.

Oh Mel, you're going to make me so so emotional. Thank you so much, you have no idea what it means to me when you say such kind words about my writing. I will admit, I tend to be so self critical so it warms my heart when someone enjoys my work <3 Yes, covid free - freaking finally - although the lack of smell stuck around for quite a while and that annoyed the hell out of me. Like literally couldn't smell a damn thing. But thankfully it has returned - just in time for Italy!! YAY!

Much, much, much love to you beautiful <3

Lights Out

[mceproductions]

Dancing the Year Away (Countdown Recap)

Before I sum up 2023 We'll look back on the past 30 days Countdown wise.

Best of 2023

Movies

1.  Mission Impossible - Dead Reckoning: Part One

2.  Oppenheimer

3.  The Super Mario Bros Movie

4.  Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse

5.  Barbie

6.  Suzume

7.  John Wick: Chapter 4

8.  Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3

9.  Killers of the Flower Moon

10. The Hunger Games: The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes

11. Elemental and The Flash

12. Fast X

13. Wonka

14. M3GAN

15. The Marvels

Runners Up:

A Man Called Otto

Shazam: Fury of the Gods

Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny

TMNT: Mutant Mayhem

80 For Brady

Worst:

1. Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey

2. Expend4bles

3. Ant Man and the Wasp: Quantumania

Honorable Mention:

Puss in Boots: The Last Wish

TV

Best New Show of 2023 Nominee*   Winner^

1.  Star Trek Picard (Paramount+)

2.  The Last of Us (HBO)^

3.  Succession (HBO)

4.  The Daily Show (Comedy Central)

5.  The Late Show with Stephen Colbert (CBS)

6.  Yellowstone (Paramount TV)

7.  The Mandalorian (Disney+)

8.  Abbott Elementary (ABC)

9.  Late Night with Seth Meyers (NBC)

10. Loki (Disney+)

11. SNL (NBC)

12. That 90’s Show (NETFLIX)*

13. My Hero Academia (ADULT SWIM)

14. Last Week Tonight with John Oliver (HBO) and Real Time with Bill Maher (HBO)

15. Ahsoka (Disney+)*

16. Attack On Titan: The Final Chapters (Crunchyroll/ADULT SWIM)

17. The Good Doctor (ABC)

18. The Owl House (Disney)

19. TONIKAWA: Over the Moon for You (Crunchyroll) and

Outlander (Starz)

20. My Adventures with Superman (ADULT SWIM)*

21. It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia (FXX)

22. 1923 (Paramount+)

23. RWBY (Crunchyroll)

24. One Piece (NETFLIX)*

25. The Simpsons (FOX)

Runners Up:

Tomo-Chan is A Girl (Crunchyroll)

Oshi No Ko (HI-DIVE)

The Walking Dead: Dead City and Daryl Dixon (AMC)

Young Sheldon (CBS)

Jimmy Kimmel Live (ABC)

Worst:

1. Velma (MAX)

2. Secret Invasion (Disney+)

3. Gotham Knights (CW)

Honorable Mention:

Star Trek Lower Decks and Strange New Worlds (Paramount+)

Music

1. Dua Lipa “Dance The Night”

2. MindaRyn “Way to Go”

3. Morgan Wallen “Last Night”

4. Jack Black “Peaches”

5. Miley Cyrus “Flowers”

6.  NSYNC “Better Place”

7.  Taylor Swift “Karma”

8.  Radwimps and Toaka “SUZUME”

9.  Ed Sheeran “Eyes Closed”

10. Jason Aldean “Try That in a Small Town”

11. Ludwig Goransson “Can You Hear The Music”

12. Olivia Rodrigo “Vampire”

13. Halle Bailey “Part of Your World”

14. Jimin “Like Crazy”

15. Ryan Gosling “Push”

16. Metro Boomin, Swae Lee, Lil Wayne, and Offset “Annihilate”

17. NBA YoungBoy, Bailey Zimmerman and Dermot Kennedy “Won’t Back Down”

18. Brian Tyler “Level Complete”

19. Neriame “Unmei Kyoudoutai!”

20. Rahul Sipligunj and Kaala Bhairva “Naatu Naatu”

21. YOASOBI “IDOL”

22. Ryan Gosling “I’m Just Ken” and Cher “DJ Play A Christmas Song”

23. Dr. Teeth and The Electric Mayhem “Rock and Roll All Nite”

24. Taylor Swift “Cruel Summer”

25. LAUV “Steal The Show”

26. U2 “Walk On (Ukraine)” and Blink 182 “One More Time”

27. Jung Kook “Standing Next to You”

28. Linkin Park “Lost”

29. The Weeknd and Ariana Grande “Die for You”

30. Rachel Zegler “Nothing You Can Take From Me”

Runners Up:

Radwimps “Kanata Haluka”

Chris Pine “This Is the Thanks I Get”

BTS “Take Two”

Casey Lee Williams “Worthy”

Oliver Anthony “Rich Men North of Richmond”

Worst:

1. Awkwafina and Daveed Diggs “The Scuttlebutt”

2. Nicki Minaj and Ice Spice “Barbie World”

3. J6 Prison Choir and Donald Trump “Justice For All”

Honorable Mention:

Taylor Swift and Her Taylor’s Version Remakes

Game of The Year

Nominee* Winner^

The Legend of Zelda: Tears of The Kingdom^

Starfield*

Sony’s Spider-Man 2*

Super Mario Bros Wonder*

Hogwarts Legacy*

Worst:

The Lord of the Rings: Gollum

THE JAW DROPPERS:

1. Damar Hamlin

2. The Enterprise D Returns to the fold

3. Barbenheimer

4. Breakthrough of Bilingual VA’s in Anime

5. Hamas Gives another Salvo

6. Memory of a Flerken Brood

7. The Toymaker Spices Up Our Lives

8.  Looks like ______ is back on the Menu

9.  The Twilight of An Icon

10. The Saga of George Santos

HM: A sport goes Swiftie

[dailyaudiobible]

10/9/2023 DAB Transcript

Jeremiah 12:1-14:10, 1 Thessalonians 1:1-2:8, Psalm 79:1-13, Proverbs 24:30-34

Today is the ninth day of October, welcome to the Daily Audio Bible. I'm Brian. It is wonderful to be here with you around the Global Campfire, taking the next step forward together. That will lead us to continue our journey in the book of Jeremiah. Once we get to the New Testament, we'll be moving into a brand-new letter from the apostle Paul, a letter to the Thessalonians, the first one, so first Thessalonians. But we'll talk about that when we get there. Jeremiah chapter 12 verse 1 through 14 verse 10.

Introduction to the Book of First Thessalonians:

Okay, as we mentioned at the beginning, we have some new territory to enter into a letter to the church in Thessalonica called first Thessalonians, and many biblical scholars believe this is the first preserved letter from the apostle Paul, maybe his first letter, but if this is true then first Thessalonians is probably the earliest existing Christian writing in the world. And that's not kind of like an outlying theory, lots of scholars believe this to be correct, true. This church, the church in Thessalonica, the establishment of the church is described in the Book of Acts in the 17th chapter, Paul had been in Philippi and there's persecution right, we read of this in the book of Acts were Paul go somewhere, then Jewish people find out about it, they kind of cause a riot. Paul, either gets beaten up or arrested or flees or whatever and goes to the next town. And so, this is kind of the story. Persecution broke out and became severe in Philippi. And so, he travels to Thessalonica and persecution breaks out there as well. But before that happens a brand-new church is planted and spins up and it's an intense time and Paul doesn’t have a whole lot of time to teach but a church has begun. And then persecution breaks out and so Paul flees in the night. This is all happening on the second missionary journey of Paul. And so, he flees and a few cities later he's in Corinth and Paul then stays in Corinth for like a year and 1/2, so it's likely that from Corinth, Paul probably wrote this letter known as first Thessalonians in the early 50s A.D. And since Paul didn’t have a whole lot of time to teach and lay things in order with this church because of the persecution. You can imagine his concern about whether they survived or what's happening with them. But also, you can imagine the questions that the new believers have, they…they have all kinds of questions that come up. And so, many of them come up in this letter, Paul sends this letter in place of himself because he's not able to go. And so, he sends Timothy with this letter, Timothy returns letting Paul know that the Thessalonians are actually doing…doing well. They’re staying true but we…we find from this letter that there are people asking questions, they don't have full understanding and so they’re questioning things that Paul had taught them, in particular things like the afterlife of a believer. And so, Paul talks about these things and so this adds to our theological understanding which, which we receive quite a bit from in the writings of Paul. And so, with that we turn the page and begin this letter. First Thessalonians today, we’ll read chapter 1 verse 1 through chapter 2 verse 8.

Prayer:

Father, we thank You for Your word. Thank You for bringing us day-by-day, step-by-step, week-by-week, month-by-month, verse-by-verse, chapter-by-chapter, book-by-book through the Scriptures and for the thing that we can't do, the transformation that happens because of it, the change in outlook, the change in perspective, the change of heart and only You can do. And so, we open ourselves to You as we enter yet another of Paul's letters. Come, Holy Spirit, lead us into all truth as we continue this journey forward, we ask, Holy Spirit, lead us deeper into Jesus. We pray, in His mighty name we ask. Amen.

Announcements:

dailyaudiobible.com is home base, it's where the Global Campfire is burning, it's where we come and join together each and every day, even though we may be vastly, not even maybe, we are vastly spread all over the earth, this is where we end up coming, whether were on the website are using the app. So, that's home base, it's where you find out what's going on around here and it's always good to know, so check it out. Check out the Community Section. This is where to get connected on social media. It's also where the Prayer Wall lives, check out the Daily Audio Bible Shop. There are resources that are available there, things to wear, things to write with, things to write on, things to listen to, things to read, things to take the journey further and so, check that all out at the Daily Audio Bible Shop, either in the web or on the app.

And if you want to partner the Daily Audio Bible. Thank you, thank you, if what we do around this Global Campfire every day is life-giving to you then thank you for your partnership, humbly and deeply there is a link on the homepage at dailyaudiobible.com. If you're using the app, you can press the Give button in the upper right-hand corner or the mailing address is P.O. Box 1996 Springhill, Tennessee 37174.

And as always, if you have a prayer request or encouragement, you can hit the Hotline button in the app, that's the little red Hotline button, Hotline button looking thing up at the top, you can’t miss it. Or you can dial 877-942-4253.

And that's it for today, I'm Brian, I love you and I'll be waiting for you here tomorrow morning.

Prayer and Encouragements:

Good morning Daily Audio Bible. This is Blessed One in AZ. It’s October 5th. I’m calling in just to give a message to Liza. Dear Sister, I’m praying for you. I’m praying that God takes your pain from you. You’re so brave and I just want you to know that you’ve been an inspiration to me, every message that I hear from you I see your face and I feel your face shining through. And your bravery. I’m praying that the Lord Jesus takes your pain right now. I know that’s the thing that’s been bothering you the most. I’m here for you. I’m here with you and my heart is here with you sister. Just know that you’re not alone and you make a difference in my life and I’m sure many other people who are listening for your messages. I want you to know sister, you are so loved and I’m praying that Jesus helps you right now to be pain-free and at peace. I love you sister.

Good morning DAB family, this is Jessica in California. I’m just listening to the September 16th podcast and I finally heard Angel Heart, who I haven’t heard in a long time. I may have missed her. I’m so glad to hear her voice and we love you Angel Heart. We missed you when we didn’t hear from you. And I just want you to know that I am still thinking about you even when I don’t hear from you and I’m still praying for you. And Lord, I just want to bring Angel Heart to you and I just thank you Lord that she’s not in pain and that Lord, You’re working on her mind. You’re helping her get out all the lies from the enemy and You’re placing Your Holy Spirit in her mind and You’re teaching her the truth and You’re taking out all the lies that the enemy planted. And You’re making her into a beautiful creation that that’s gonna serve Your kingdom and help other people that have gone through the same thing that she’s gone through. I just thank You Lord that if the enemy had a hold on her like this, it’s because she has a special place in Your heart, Lord, and the enemy wanted to take that away. But Lord, You’ve redeemed her life and Lord, that You’re gonna use her as a vessel to help many other people that have been in her place. And I just thank You Lord, for her sweet spirit and her willingness to call out for her brothers and sisters to pray for her and to ask for help. I just thank You Lord for her life and what You’re doing. And I pray that the Holy Spirit comes and strengthens her and helps her through every lie of the enemy. In Jesus mighty name. Amen. I love you DAB family and I love you Angel Heart and I’m so glad to hear your voice. Take care. Bye.

Hello DAB family, this is Riding for Christ from Southern California. And I liked to give a little context from the last prayer request. I am in law enforcement for a small city in the area of East L.A. And I drive about a little close to 80 miles one way to go to work. I’ve been searching for the past year for something closer to home. And a little while back I requested for prayer for an opportunity that was close by. I did not get a yes, I did not get a no. And so, it got answered with a wait. Another opportunity has come up and I would like to ask my DAB family if they can please pray for me for this opportunity for a, to get a police officer position for a department that’s way, way closer than…than where I am now. So, yes, please DAB family. I thank you in advance for praying and until next one.

Shalom Daily Audio Bible, this is Dwayne from Wisconsin, all praise and glory to our wonderful Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Calling in for Liza, what a warrior she is. What a shining light you are Liza, for the rest of us, in this time and the struggles that you’re going through and what you’re dealing with. You’re such an uplifting young lady. It would be a privilege and an honor to have met you in person. But someday, someday we will meet. We want to lift you up, we want to give you praise, want to give you strength. We ask that the Lord is with you and guide you through this time. We pray for miraculous healing. We ask that the Lord will allow you to live longer. To be a light and encouragement for others, myself included. We are on our knees, lifting our hands high, asking our Lord and Savior that He would heal you. And if that is not His will, but His will is to have you meet Him soon, that He will be with you, guide you, give you the peace, understanding and comfort that you need and that you speak of so eloquently. Liza, our hearts are heavy for you. But we believe that you can be healed if it is they Lords will. We ask this in our Beloved Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Amen and God Bless.

[luvfae]

LITTLE STAR

PART FOURTEEN

[final chapter]

summary: elliot's been watching you for a while, but he never dared to approach you. you were a good girl at heart and he didn’t think you'd want anything to do with him. all of that changes one friday night at a party, when both of your worlds collide.

fandom: euphoria

parings: elliot x f reader

warnings: swearing, mentions of sex, angst, mentions of addiction, mentions of drugs

little star masterlist

note: first things first, i’m sorry in advance for this chapter, but this was always my plan for this series. i can’t believe we’re at the end. my 200 followers gift is over & now i’m 50 followers away from 1000. this is insane. i love you all & i hope you enjoyed this series as much as i did writing it 💗

Late in the night when you were fast asleep Elliot received a call from Rue, which he answered in the bathroom. He didn't want to wake you.

Rue's phone call was somewhat of a wake up call, the push he really needed to understand the damage he had seriously done to you. He didn't mean to corrupt you, turn you into someone you weren't, but alas, it had happened.

The next morning he set up a plan, he knew if you were addicted to oxycodone that eventually you'd take one without his knowledge. So he counted the exact amount of pills he had.

Low and behold when you left for home, two pills had gone missing. Elliot rang you straight away, throwing around accusations, that you denied, but you knew they were true and so did Elliot.

You hadn't seen Elliot for 24 hours, not only because you had both came to blows over the phone, but also because your parents had been complaining about never seeing you anymore.

This 24 hours left Elliot to do some thinking. He spent hours staring at his ceiling, wondering what he was going to do to help you. He had thought of various plans, calling Rue to get her input, but she turned down every one. Rue told Elliot exactly what he needed to do to get you back to your old self.

By the time 30 hours had passed, you and Elliot made up. You apologised for stealing the pills and he accepted your apology. You facetimed for a few hours until you went to bed.

You woke up early on Sunday and walked over to Elliot's house, feeling a little shaky due to the lack of pills. You needed one badly, but you didn't want to come to blows again for stealing another. So you'd just have to convinced him to give one to you.

He was in his bedroom when you arrived. You dumped your purse on his bed, kissing him with a smile on your face.

"Hi," you said. He smiled in return, his guitar in his arms. "Got any weed?" You asked, slowly trying to ease your way into getting an oxy.

Elliot grabbed your hand, rubbing circles into your palm. "I wrote a song for you," Elliot said, clearing his throat. You grinned at his words. "Can I play it for you?" He asked.

"Of course, Elli," you said and he dropped your hand, beginning to strum on his guitar. His eyes darting from his fingers to you as he began to sing.

"Little star, feels like you feel right on my head."

At first the song made you feel warm, happy.

"Us against the world, just a couple sinners making fun of hell," He sang, looking into your eyes. "If I keep you here, i'll only be doing it for myself."

You furrowed your eyebrows, smile slowly dropping as he continued to sing and the lyrics started piecing themselves together. You just hoped you had the wrong idea of what this song truly was.

"I know this thing is broken, so i'll leave my door wide open."

You started to feel sick, the small hope you had of this not being a break up song disintegrating and you felt your entire heart shatter when he sang, "one day we'll meet again."

"I gave it all to see you shine again, I hope it was worth it in the end," by now you had tears pooling in your eyes. Your felt deflated and horrible, hoping this was just a dream. Hoping that you were painting it out to be more than it was.

His strumming stopped and you gulped, looking down at your feet. "That was beautiful, but um... It wasn't what I was expecting," you sniffled, fidgeting with your fingers.

"Y/N, I care about you, so much," Elliot began. "But what i've done to you isn't what I wanted, this isn't what I, or anyone else, wants for you."

"You've been talking to Rue, haven't you?" You asked, tears streaming down your cheeks as your eyes snapped up to him. "This is our life, not hers, Elliot. I'm happy, you're happy, why ruin this?"

"But i’m not happy, Y/N… You're the best thing that ever happened to me and the fact that I did this to you hurts me more than you can imagine," Elliot said. "Which is why I have to let you go."

Your bottom lip quivered at his words, wiping your cheeks. "I ruined myself for you, Elliot," you whispered. "Changed everything about myself so that you'd stay interested in me... I'm a fool, huh?"

Elliot sighed. "I liked you how you were, Y/N," he said. "I was interested in you months before we talked at that party."

"I love you, please don't do this to me," you begged, walking closer to him, grabbing his hands.

"I love you too..." He replied, your eyes lightning up at his words. "Which is why I have to let you go," he said, slipping his hands out of your grip. You sobbed, hands covering your eyes. "It's for the best, please understand," Elliot sighed, standing up to hug you.

"It's not!" You cried. "This is not for the best!"

"Y/N... please," Elliot said, tears in his eyes, trying his hardest to hold them back.

"Why can't we just be together?" You asked, desperation clear in your voice. The thought of not having him anymore was unbearable. Your heart was beating way to fast, losing your breath.

"This is for the best, I promise," Elliot said, pressing a kiss to your forehead. "Sit down, let me calm you down and then i'll take you home," he said, sitting you down on his bed, an arm wrapped around you as the both of cried.

You stayed like that for an hour, just holding each other while Elliot tried to convince you that this truly was for the best. But you didn't believe him, if it was for the best why did it hurt so much?

Eventually you stood up, looking at his bedroom for the last time. Letting him drive you home for the last time.

You didn't want to get out of his car, looking over at him with a frown.

"I'm sorry baby," he whispered. You nodded. "You'll see soon enough that this really is for the best, I promise... I love you."

"I love you too," you said, giving him a sad smile. You wished you had said it sooner so you could of heard him say it more.

Elliot reached over, cupping your cheeks, pressing one final kiss against your lips. "I'll see you around," he said, watching you get out of his car. "I'll always be here for you."

"Me too," you said, wiping your tears before you closed the door. Walking towards your front porch, turning around, giving him a small wave as he drove off and you burst into tears again. Immediately calling Lexi.

-

Your heartache got easier with the changing seasons, and slowly you went back to your normal self. The first few days without the oxycodone were hard, somehow you fought through it. But once the pain of that went away all you could focus on was Elliot and the aching you felt, the constant longing. Even though he was the one who hurt you he was also the only person you wanted to comfort you.

But it got easier, Lexi and Rue were by your side. You spent hours crying with them, letting them hug you and help you heal. It took you a few weeks to realise that it truly was for the best. That you and Elliot were the definition of right person, wrong time. You didn't regret a single thing about the relationship.

You blended in once again, hiding yourself behind over sized sweat shirts, a book in your hand. You focused on your grades again, picking them up, pouring your heart and soul into your schoolwork, trying to reclaim everything you had lost a few months ago.

Seeing him around school was the hardest. Running to the bathroom on the verge of tears at the mere sight of him, longing looks across the hall being shared, small smiles when you walked past each other and by the time the new school year started, you were strangers again. Two strangers with a whole lot of history.

It wasn't any easier for Elliot, his drug use only increasing without you by his side. He didn't have a reason to even attempt to get sober, so why bother? He felt at ease when you went back to your old self, the girl he gawked over for months finally returning. Once he saw you back into your old routine, smiling with Lexi, pen on paper scribbling away, was when he started to heal.

But he didn't know if he would ever fully heal and neither did you, he meant what he said in that song. One day, we'll meet again. Maybe not today, or tomorrow, or even in five years time, but eventually he would weasel his way into your life again. But for now, he was quite content with watching you flourish from the sidelines and he did just that, every single day until graduation.

Elliot watched you walk on stage to graduate, you received various amounts of awards, you were even given a scholarship to your dream collage. Seeing you so happy made him happy, in this moment he knew that he really had done the right thing by ending things with you a year ago.

You were moving out of state soon to start college and although you hadn't spoken in a year, he had to say his last goodbye.

"Y/N," he said, grabbing your wrist. You looked over you shoulder, eyes softening at the sight of him. "Congratulations, you deserve this," he smiled.

You grinned up at him, turning around to face him. "Thank you," you nodded. "And thank you for breaking up with me, I don't think I would of received a single award if we had stayed together... not that I don't miss you or anything," you said.

Elliot nodded at your words, dropping your wrist. "I told you it was for the best... Good luck out there," he said.

"You too," you replied, turning away, ready to walk away, but you froze. Pursing your lips, you turned back around to face him, wrapping your arms around his torso, hugging him tightly for possibly the last time. Elliot hugged you back and your eyes fluttered shut, cheek pressed against his chest. "I just want you to know that no matter where life takes us i'll never forget you," you said.

Elliot smiled at your words. "I'll never forget you either... how could I? You're the first person I ever loved," Elliot said.

You pulled away from him, your eyes becoming glossy with tears. "You're the first person I ever loved too," you said, reaching up on your tip toes to kiss his cheek.

Elliot cupped your cheeks, smashing his lips against yours. Your eyes widened before fluttering shut, hands snaking around his neck. You had missed the familiar feeling of his lips on yours. You pulled away, staring up at him with a smile

"Maybe we should have sex," Elliot suggested, taking you by surprise.

"Just one last time won't hurt, right?" You laughed.

"My car?" He asked, as the two of you began walking.

"I have a car now, tinted windows and all," you said.

"Your car it is," Elliot smirked.

Rue and Lexi stood side by side, watching the two of you walk away together. Lexi's arms folded across her chest. Rue's eyes squinted, a hand over her forehead to stop the sun from getting in her eyes.

"This can't be good," Rue said.

"Honestly Rue, I think their soulmates," Lexi said, watching as you and Elliot disappeared into the back seat of your car. "No matter how much you try and keep them apart, they'll always make their way back to each other."

Rue hummed, looking over at the brunette girl. "Ice cream?" She asked. Lexi smiled, intertwining her arm with Rue's and walking off.

THE END

© luvfae 2022

[demonslayedher]

How Does Eating Humans Work?

Hello, Gotou here. We’re shamelessly borrowing from the format of a KnY Fanbook #2 comic to launch an investigation into demon metabolism and development by crossing the Sanzu River again to interview demons in the underworld. While we’ll be using canon materials as a base, the analysis and conjecture herein is personal, so we ask for your understanding. Also, please note that consuming any food in the underworld will make you unable to return, and we cannot promise your safety even though the interview subjects are dead, so please come along at your own risk.

Some of the questions we’d like to answer are, why do demons need to eat humans? How much do they need to eat to survive? Are there factors that influence how eating humans makes them stronger? If they don’t want to kill humans, what are their other options? We’ve rounded up some special guests below the cut (hidden for length and grossness), everyone from the lowly Temple Demon to the lovely Tamayo, to see what their actions in canon might tell us.

First, a review of what canon tells us, mostly as summarized in Fanbook #2: 1. With one exception named Yushirou, all demons were created by Kibutsuji Muzan, for his own purposes. They all have some amount of his blood, and can be divided into four classes depending on how powerful they are. From top to bottom, the Upper Moons, the Lower Moons, demons with special abilities, and other demons without any special characteristics. 2. Demons may be stronger depending on how much of Kibutsuji Muzan’s blood they have. Most beings’ cannot handle a large amount of his blood, and it will rupture the cells and that being will die, but there are demons who adapt well to it. 3. Typically, sunlight is the only way to kill a demon, by either bathing them in sunlight or cutting of their head with a Nichirin blade. However, there are powerful demons for whom chopping off their head does not work, and if it’s strong enough, demons can also be killed by wisteria poison.

4. Demons eat human blood and flesh. The more they eat, the stronger they become, and the faster their regenerative abilities become. Some humans have “Marechi,” a rare blood type, which is especially nutritious to demons, and eating one Marechi is the equivalent of eating several humans.

That’s an interesting thing we’d like to come back to, especially since we’re looking for quantitative information about how demons gain nutrition (though I have my doubts we'll get enough for statistical analysis). As an interesting note, Fanbook #2 also tells us that if demons try to consume the same edibles humans do, they’ll vomit it back up.

I’m told that Miss Tamayo drinks tea, though. That’ll be an interesting question for later. In my notes, it seems she’s also explained to Tanjirou back in Chapter 15 that demons will normally go berserk if they go a long time without consuming any blood or flesh. Berserk is one thing, but I wonder if they can starve to death? We’ll see if these canon clues will lead us to anything. We’ll begin now in an interview format. Hopefully this will go smoothly, but I’ve got a feeling it won’t. First up, we’ve the Temple Demon.

Temple: Who were you calling ‘lowly’ just now? Up there, above the cut?

Gotou: That was in a literal sense, not having Blood Techniques means you’re in the bottom common tier of demons.

Temple: Argh. Fine. What do you want to know?

Gotou: In Chapter 2, you were spotted with three human victims. However, it seems you left their bodies mostly intact and only ate small parts instead of consuming one full human at a time. Could you comment on this?

Temple: I’d have gotten to more later if that whelp with the strong legs didn’t interrupt me! Who’s got time to eat entire humans anyway? I went for the easy stuff first.

Gotou: I see. It appears you might had focused on key organs, like the heart and the liver. Would you say these are especially nutritionally dense?

Temple: I guess. If I’m going to eat humans, I’m going to start with what’s worth bothering to digest. Blood’s easier on the stomach, so that’s what I was busy with on the lady there.

Gotou: Then it takes effort to digest? Hmm. Let’s come back to this later. How many humans would you say you consumed, including these three?

Temple: Not a lot… I tried to get a variety so I could get stronger faster, but…

Gotou: I’ll put down a guess as ten or less. Let’s move on to someone who has a sharper memory for numbers. One of our longer-lived guests at Mt. Fujikasane for 47 years, the Hand Demon. While most of the demons on the mountain had only eaten two or three humans, you’ve eaten a whole 50 of the children who headed into the Final Selection, didn’t you?

Hand: Yes, that’s right. It was hard at first since I wasn’t very strong, and the demons usually all went crazy there eating each other, just like that one brat who got away in Chapter 7 said. If you could manage to kill any of the kids, you had the other demons to fight off to even get a piece to yourself. That was enough to get me by, and stronger, little by little. Your body learns to make your meals last, and make the most of what you can get. I usually only had a bite of one child a year, can you imagine how horrible that was? Most demons who survive usually figure out some way to develop and survive better, and once my cells found something that worked for me, I kept doing it. I got really good at snatching away prey from other demons, and soon enough I was a bigger threat than any of them. None of them could, you might say, lay a hand on me.

Gotou: That’s an interesting point about self-development. A demon named Nezuko was spent two years doing that in her sleep.

Hand: She must have had a big meal before that!

Gotou: Well, anyway. It seems that in near starving conditions, your metabolism made the most of what you had, leading to the most efficient use of whatever food was available to you.

Hand: That’s right, I got really good at it. Wasn’t always pretty, but I made it work. I got to a point where I could go two years without eating and still keep my wits about me while the other demons were going mad. But I chose to eat. I liked to keep my appetite for specific children.

Gotou: That smile is not reassuring. Some humans taste better than others, I guess?

Hand: That’s for sure. This one kid tasted awful, like rust and man sweat! I still don’t have that disgusting taste out of my mouth! But he was one of my more satisfying meals, so I ate more of him.

Gotou: Then why would you… nevermind, I don’t like that smile, no further questions. While I had hoped to keep these interviews focused on quantities of humans consumed, it does seem personal taste is worth asking about. I had tried to invite a Swamp Demon from Chapter 11, but it kept arguing with itself and it felt like I’d be wasting my time. The one definite thing I learned was that this demon is picky, with a distinct preference for 16-year-old girls. Based on the number of trinkets he kept, it seems he had consumed at least seventeen of them, including several in one town. Sheesh, that’s sort of a rough mission to send a first-timer on. I’ve got a more cooperative guest here to discuss her tastes, a Snake Demon who, according to Chapter 188, has a special taste for baby flesh.

Snake: Thank you for having me here. It’s good to be appreciated again.

Gotou: Did you only eat babies?

Snake: Goodness, no. Babies are delicious, but they aren’t very nutritious. And their skulls certainly aren’t that big, the ones I lounged around with were from the people whom I killed and stole from. But you know the nice thing about baby skulls? They’re still soft. They take a long time to digest, but I can swallow them whole.

Gotou: Like… like a snake, then. Sorry, I’m a little ill hearing that. Let’s back up, were all those skulls the remains of adults you ate, then?

Snake: Meh, I ate some of them of better-looking ones, but most of them I only killed. I could usually kill a lot more at a time than I could bother eating, my killing record was fifty women all at once.

Gotou: And you didn’t find that wasteful?

Snake: Wasteful? Not at all. I wasn’t exactly in dire straits, I lived a more luxurious life than most demons do. That meant I could afford to wait for a truly delicious meal, like how you humans might leave something in a slow-cooker to enjoy the perfect combination of doneness and tenderness, plated in the most appetizing of ways.

Gotou: I guess demons and humans are similar in that regard.

Snake: I’m so glad you can relate! Then you understand the frustration of a meal you’ve be preparing for years opening up the slow-cooker and running away right when they were just about done.

Gotou: I have never had that experience.

Snake: I’ll get you, my pretty. And your little snake, too.

Gotou: I think we might have gotten a little off-topic here. It does seem digesting humans comes with some difficulty. I’d like to invite the Drum Demon in next. Your name is Kyougai, I hear?

Kyougai: !!

Gotou: Kyogai, right?

Kyougai: You’ve heard of me! You know my name!

Gotou: I happened to, yes.

Kyougai: What have you heard???

Gotou: That you were kicked out of the Lower Moons for being unable to consume enough humans.

Kyougai: Oh. ……..yeah, that’s me.

Gotou: I thought demons go berserk if they go a long time without consuming humans. Wouldn’t that make an inability to consume them problematic?

Kyougai: It wasn’t that I couldn’t eat them! Like I said in Chapter 24, I had to in order to sustain myself, just like any other demon. But, at some point, I couldn’t eat as much as I used to. That happens to humans too, doesn’t it? When you just can’t stomach anymore?

Gotou: You mean like when you’ve overeaten? In a human’s case that feeling may go away within a few hours.

Kyougai: Sort of like that, but you know, humans reach a time when nothing is appetizing or the thought of eating makes them feel sick, right? Isn’t that the human condition?

Gotou: …uh… maybe if they have a medical condition? Or anxiety? Do demons get anxiety? Or eating disorders?

Kyougai: I… I don’t know. I just wasn’t good enough.

Gotou: I think it’s plenty good if you stopped eating humans. Though to have developed Blood Techniques and been a Lower Moon in the first place, you must had eaten a great number of them.

Kyougai: You think I’m great?

Gotou: What?

Kyougai: No, sorry, I was getting ahead of myself. It’s true, I used to be able to eat as many as the other Lower Moons always consumed. Our stomachs were stronger, you might say. Demons got strong by eating humans, and then the more you did that the better you usually got at it, so the strong ones would eat more and more and keep getting stronger and stronger. At least, that’s how it usually worked. I’ve seen other demons below me reached that point too, where they feel the drive to eat, but then they have trouble digesting it for a long time, so they don’t wind up eating that many people.

Gotou: Then it would make sense to eat the most nutritionally dense parts first.

Kyougai: Or a Marechi.

Gotou: Yes, or a Marechi.

Kyougai: It was a great idea, wasn’t it?

Gotou: I cannot condone any consumption of humans as a good idea.

Kyougai: I knew it. I’m nothing. Go ahead, stomp all over everything I ever tried to accomplish.

Gotou: I think I’m going to move on to my next interviewee now. It looks like we’ve got… oh, would you look at this? Lower Moon One. Enmu, I believe.

Enmu: You can believe whatever you want. I’m happy to help.

Gotou: I don’t need any help, thanks. I’m curious, since you were one of the stronger demons out there, it seems you had a stronger capacity for consuming humans.

Enmu: I did, I was always careful and paced myself so the Demon Slayers wouldn’t notice me. I took my time. I liked to enjoy e-e-e-a-c-h one.

Gotou: Then you had tastes too? Like babies, or 16-year-old girls?

Enmu: I could season any human to my liking. They’re all very easy to prepare.

Gotou: I’m still trying to get quantitative data. Can you tell me at least a rough estimate of how many humans you consumed?

Enmu: I told this more precisely to that boy with the earrings back in Chapter 59, and I can tell you this too. At my best, I could had eaten over two-hundred people at once if I took my time.

Gotou: OH MY GAW----sorry, I dropped my pen. Two hundred, at once?

Enmu: Yes. If I had just. Had. A little. More. Time.

Gotou: Clearly there is a huge difference between what common demons are capable of and what the Twelve Moons are capable of.

Daki: Psh, those were all any random common people. That’s nothing to brag about.

Gotou: Excuse me, and you are?

Daki: Daki, Upper Moon Six. You want something really impressive, you talk to the Upper Moons.

Gotou: I’m sorry, I don’t see you on my list.

Daki: What! Your list is stupid. Look me in the eyes, I’m Upper Moon Six!

Gotou: Very well, then. What can you tell me about your diet, Miss Upper Moon Six?

Daki: That’s more like it. It’s true that digestion takes a while, and takes some effort. Even though we Upper Moons may have eaten hundreds of people in our lifetimes, it’s not as if we gorge ourselves. The clever ones among us save prey for later to eat when we feel ready for it.

Gotou: Food storage? How do you keep them fresh?

Daki: You leave them still alive, numbskull. Nobody wants to eat something cold, that’s gross.

Gotou: I see, so that’s why demons prefer to go after new kills instead of saving what they’ve already managed to kill. That also might explain why the demons on Mt. Fujikasane wouldn’t had eaten many humans, if they found long dead ones in edible.

Daki: You want to know the real secret to eating humans? You can eat what you find tastes good, sure. But to get stronger, you eat strong people. Like your Corp members, the ones besides chumps like you? Using all that Breath makes their muscles really lean and potent, it’s like they come offering themselves as protein bars for us.

Gotou: You make them sound like a fad diet…

Daki: The real secret is eating Pillars. Besides Marechi, they’re the strongest meals out there. Guess how many I’ve eaten?

Gotou: I don’t have the data to make an educated guess.

Daki: Then get educated! Look back at Chapter 88! I’ve eaten seven Pillars, and my brother has eaten fifteen!

Gotou: Your brother? Who is he, then, Upper Moon Five?

Daki: What? Ew. Gross. Gross! No way, ew!

Gotou: Hmm… eating Pillars, huh? Well, I can think of one Pillar who was…

Douma: Me too!

Gotou: Speak of the devil.

Douma: Actually, we Upper Moons can! And he's not Satan, that's not how this works. But I guess Muzan-sama’s curse doesn’t effect us now. Ask me anything you want!

Gotou: That Chapter 143 reference was such a rude entrance. I understand that Pillars are particularly nutritious—

Douma: Oh, please don’t misunderstand! I don’t even eat all the Pillars I’ve encountered. There was the one Flower Pillar who got away from me, but some of the boy pillars I just leave around. What’s really the key to consistent nutritional intake is women! It’s really unhealthy for a demon not to get enough women in their diet, that’s why even if you’re only looking for Marechi or Pillars, your metabolism is going to get thrown out of whack with sudden big meals. You grow a stronger metabolism with consistency, I believe!

Gotou: If I could stop you there, I had an image from Chapter 142 I preferred to focus on for this case study. I see you keep a wide collection of skulls, from victims whom I assume you ate.

Douma: Yes, they all stayed together inside me for eternity, but the room looked lonely without décor.

Gotou: It seems other demons usually go for nutritionally dense organs like hearts or livers, or easy to digest parts of the body, perhaps just blood sometimes. Eating the entire victim, bones and all, doesn’t seem to be the norm.

Douma: Bones are organs too, you know! That’s where blood is made, at its freshest. They do take more practice in learning to digest, and I had to find a way around not having to chew them, but the bone marrow is very, very good for you, so I make sure to consume it frequently. It may take more time and it causes some of my followers to panic more while they wait, though, that’s a bit of a downside. Oh, and I guess bones can make good storage for some sneaky poison. Even fingernails and hair follicles, who’d have thought?

Gotou: I don’t think hair would have much nutritional value in the first place. In all my years, I can never recall seeing a victim with their hair eaten.

Douma: Tsk, tsk! Clearly you haven’t done much metabolism research in advance. I was really impressed by how well Shinobu-chan understood how my digestion would work. Eating hair can do amazing things! Isn’t that right, Genya-kun?

Genya: ?????????

Gotou: Genya-kun!?

Genya: What am I doing here?

Gotou: I don’t think you’re supposed to be here. Isn’t there, you know, another side? The other direction?

Genya: What are you doing here? Did you die?

Gotou: I’m here doing research on demon metabolism and how they get stronger by consuming flesh.

Douma: What can you tell us about what up with having your friend feed you hair you found on the floor in Chapters 170-171, Genya-kun?

Genya: I’m not a demon!! Why the hell are you asking me?

Douma: ‘Hell’! Haha, good one!

Gotou: How do you even know about that? You were dead almost a full volume before that. And Genya’s different, he’s not a case study in how demons consuming humans works!

Douma: Are you certain?

Gotou: I hear the term get thrown around a lot that he’s ‘half-demon’, but—

Genya: I’m not a demon!!!

Gotou: --how would that even work? That would imply that one of his parents had to be a demon, and that—

Genya: What did you say about my mother!?!

Gotou: What? Nothing—

Genya: You say that to my face! You just trying saying something about my mother to my face! My mother never actually ate any flesh, you got that? She doesn’t deserve any of this!

Gotou: Genya, calm down, what—

Douma: I see we’re learning nothing about hair at all. Maybe Kokushibou-dono would provide better commentary on that?

Genya: Mom? Mo-o-o-o-m? Are you down here somewhere?

Gotou: And there he goes… wait, did you say Kokushibou? Upper Moon One? Oh no—he—he didn’t want me bothering him, he did not agree to another interview—

Douma: He-e-e-e-e-y, Kokushibou-dono! How did that work with Genya-kun eating your hair? Hair can be nutritious, right?

Kokushibou: You would gain… nothing… from consuming human hair… it’s not… flesh… you wasted your energy digesting it…

Douma: Aww, cutting it off them would had been sad, though.

Kokushibou: Demon hair… like demon weapons… is made… from our unique cells. It’s not dead… like human locks. Because that boy ate my live cells… it affected him…

Gotou: Yes, because he had a very, very unique metabolism, analyzed separately in this post. To be perfectly clear, Genya is completely human with cells that could temporarily transform, and he never consumed human flesh.

Kokushibou: He… vexes me…

Gotou: Um… while I’ve got you here, you’re one of the longest lived demons, clocking in at over three, maybe four centuries. Do you have any estimate of how many humans you’ve consumed?

Kokushibou: ……I see in… Chapter 100… that you are 23 years old?

Gotou: That is correct.

Kokushibou: Do you bother… remembering how many meals… you’ve had in a mere 23 years?

Gotou: I’m very sorry to have bothered you.

Douma: Kokushibou-dono’s ancient compared to the rest of us! But if I tried, I could probably recall. Let’s see. One, two, three, four…

Gotou: Is that? Your finger in your brain? Oh—ohhh—that is disgusting---I really don’t need to know numbers that badly, please stop. Is there maybe just some average you can give me for the Upper Moons instead? Like how many you’d eat in a month?

Douma: I wish I could, but a certain someone was an annoying outlier and didn’t like to eat so many humans. He made me worry all the time about his health.

Gotou: Really? Who might that be?

Douma: Hello-o-o-o-o-? Akaza-dono? Yoohoo! He spends all his time with his wife now and never answers when I call, it makes me so sad. Akaza-dono did eat humans, plenty of strong ones, but any time he wasn’t under orders from Muzan he liked to spend his time training instead of eating. Fanbook #1 says he did that way more than eating!

Gotou: Training? What sort of training?

Douma: Similar things to what your Corp members did, I imagine. Doing squats, throwing punches, things like that.

Gotou: Then demon muscles had similar function to human muscles, and could be strengthened through hard work? That’s surprising.

Douma: I know, right? I’ll let you in on a secret, I don’t think it was the physically repetition that did anything. I think it was his willpower getting honed and shaping his muscles.

Douma: I had to focus when I acquired new skills too, like breaking down poisons. A lot of sad, lowly demons, like that Hand Demon fellow? They focus as hard as they can in their desperation, or focus on some strong emotion or attachment or whatever, and they grow and develop because of it. Sometimes all their weak bodies can manage is an ugly mutation, but that’s proof enough of how much focus they had.

Gotou: That sheds a lot of light on Nezuko, actually.

Douma: Shed “light” on Nezuko-chan, hahaha! Sunlight! You humans are all so witty!

Gotou: Speaking of willpower, I’ve got one more interview I need to get to down here. Of all the demons I have records of, only Nezuko went her whole time as a demon without consuming any human flesh, although she did go through moments of berserk cravings for it. It’s possible that other demons were killed before they could consume anything, but typically they will consume flesh as soon as possible, which is why its common for their family and close relations to be among the first ones killed. Tomioka-san even mentioned in Chapter 1 that these close relations are especially nutritious.

Gotou: A demon about as old as Kokushibou, if not older, is a special case of her own. She was one of the only demons we know of to have escaped Kibutsuji’s curse and acted in dependently of him, including having created a demon of her own after two hundred years of trying. Most notably to our purposes, she trained herself to subsist on small amounts of blood, after having survived on corpses and wild animals for a time, according to the extensive Taisho Secrets at the end of Volume 21.

Tamayo: I explained this in more detail to Tanjirou-san in Chapter 15, but I went on to purchase blood from poor people, and extracted it in ways that wouldn’t be harmful to them. The one demon I created, Yushirou, could subsist on even less. I gained enough self-control that I could treat injured humans without feeling tempted into a berserk state.

Gotou: I was just talking to Douma about willpower making demons capable of accomplishing new physical developments. Was that how you were able to gain this state? I heard you even enjoy a cup of tea now and then.

Tamayo: Yes, I’ve taken a liking to it. I’d offer you some if not for this, you know, being hell. It’s nothing like the hell I went through when first resisting consuming humans, though. My demon body refused to take anything but fresh human flesh at first, but in the hardest moments, I always remembered a kind demon hunter who said he believed in me and my desire to defeat Kibutsuji Muzan. I believe Nezuko may have summoned her strength to resist the call of her demon cells in a similar way; she knew she had her brother there to rely on. Once she mastered something as remarkable as resisting the need for human flesh, it gave her the freedom to prioritize other developments.

Gotou: You spent centuries researching demon cells, especially how demons may break down and metabolize poisons.

Tamayo: I had not studied the metabolism of poisons until working with Shinobu-san. The medicine we concocted for Kibutsuji was only possible thanks to her work, and I couldn’t had worked with many of those wisteria-based substances on my own. I feel I was only there to fill in the gaps of her brilliant understanding.

Gotou: You’re very humble. I would pass along my thanks and compliments to Shinobu-sama too, but I’m pretty sure she’s not down here. On that note, did Genya-kun go back home?

Tamayo: He did after a nice reunion with his mother just now, it was very sweet. Shizu-san and I get along well, after all, we both carry similar guilt.

Gotou: Wait, was his mother a demon? That means Wind-sama’s mother was too? Wait?? What??

Tamayo: The worst hell I went through, or that any demon has gone through, is to realize what you’ve eaten after the hunger-driven madness clears. Being similar to your own cells, they’re easy on a volatile new anatomy to break down and digest. That’s why many demons may have driven themselves to forget everything all over again, or to twist their personalities to justify the horror, saying that because they ate the hearts of their loved ones and because demon flesh can live forever, then they never truly killed them. The truth always remained untwisted for me, and to this day, it torments me more than anything in this underworld can try.

Gotou: …

Tamayo: You should wake up now, Gotou. You’ve been through a lot; the nightmares must be taxing on your health. Please remember to eat well.