#a complex boy
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George Harrison and Paul McCartney interviewed about Bob Dylan and the Beatles by MOJO magazine in 1993, including extracts from John Lennon being interviewed about Dylan in 1979:
GEORGE HARRISON
Do you remember Dylan at The Albert Hall?
Oh yeah, I was there. I remember it a lot. First of all you had him saying, You remember this song? This is how it used to go and this is how it goes now! But the thing I remember most about it was all these people who'd never heard of folk until Bob Dylan came around and two years later they're staunch folk fans and they're walking out on him when he was playing the electric songs. Which is so stupid. But he actually played rock'n'roll before. Nobody knew that at the time, but Bob had been in Bobby Vee's band as the piano player and he'd played rock'n'roll. And then he became Bob Dylan the Folk Singer so, for him, it was just returning back. And maybe The Beatles - well, not just The Beatles but the whole wave of rock'n'roll that happened again in the '60s - spurred him on into wanting to get back into the electric guitar.
Was there a degree of Beatles/Dylan mutual envy at that time?
Well, he got a little bit of pleasure out of us and we got a lot of pleasure out of him. But you know everybody starts out being slightly grungey, rebels against the world, we were like that too. You know the famous Beatles story: we cleaned up our act a bit because Brian Epstein could get us more work if we had suits. By the time Bob came along it was like, Yeah, we all want to be more funky again, and please put a little more balls into the lyric of the song. There's a funny thing that I don't think anybody else has noticed and that is when John wrote Norwegian Wood, it was obviously a very Bob Dylan song, and right after that Bob's album came out and it had a song called 4th Time Around. You want to check out the tune of that - it's the same song going round and round.
You were very consciously listening to each other?
Well I can't speak for him but we were listening. I think it was his second album we heard first in February or January of '64 and we were in Paris at The Olympia Theatre and we got a copy of Freewheelin' and we just played it, just wore it out. The content of the song lyrics and just the attitude - it was just incredibly original and wonderful, you know.
Did you meet him in '66?
I met him every time. I felt a bit sad for him because he was a bit wasted at that time. He'd been on a world tour and he looked like he'd been on a world tour. He looked like he needed a rest and that was the time he went back home and fell off his bike and almost broke his neck. So...
PAUL MCCARTNEY
What sort of shape was he in? He was just winding up a world tour...
He was pretty wasted. There were a couple of times I went to hotels - one was the Mayfair, I can't remember the other one. But he didn't appear much more wasted than anyone else - you know, we kept up with him! We all sort of lay around together; it wasn't the kind of scene where you had to say anything enlightening.
So it was pretty much Dylan holding court.
Oh it was, very much. It was a little bit An Audience with Dylan in those days: you went round to the Mayfair Hotel and waited in an outer room, while Bob was, you know, in the other room, in the bedroom, and we were getting ushered in one by one. I know Keith was there. And Brian.
Didn't you feel you both had to perform?
No, not really. I was just quite happy to pay homage. The only trouble really was that occasionally people would come out and say, you know, Bob's taking a nap or make terrible excuses, and I'd say, It's OK man, I understand, he'd out of it, you know. And they were a bit guarding, like the Pope's men at The Vatican. He can't see you just now...
Didn't he come round and play you an acetate of Blonde On Blonde? Or you played him an acetate of Revolver?
No, I played him some stuff off Pepper later. And I'd brought it on acetate or a tape of Pepper...
It must have been Revolver. This was '66.
I'm pretty sure it was Pepper 'cos I remember him saying, Oh I get it, you don't want to be cute any more. And I was saying, Yeah, that's it. We really admired him. I'd known his stuff as long as I'd known Ray Charles's, so he was a big hero of ours. He was very keen on I Wanna Hold Your hand - he'd thought the middle eight, "I can't hide, I can't hide" was "I get high, I get high" and was rather amused by that. And we were amused that he was amused. Then we eventually met him in New York, one of the big hotels there, he came round with his road manager who was a nice bloke. Al Aronowitz was there, a kind of mate of ours, Dylan, his road manager and a few other people showed up. And they brought along with some illegal substances of which we partook and had... quite a wild night.
What happened?
Well, I was wandering around looking for a pencil because I discovered the meaning of life that evening and I wanted to get it down on a bit of paper. And I went into a little room and wrote it all down, 'cos I figured that, coming from Liverpool, this was all very exotic and i had to let my ordinary people know, you know, what this was all about: like if you find the meaning of life you've got to kind of put it about! Mal handed me the little bit of paper the next morning after the party and on it was written, in very scrawly handwriting: THERE ARE SEVEN LEVELS. Till ten we'd been sort of hard scotch and coke men. It sort of changed that evening.
In '66 it seemed as though you almost wanted to change places: Dylan was the mystic folk prophet who wanted to be a pop star; The Beatles were the pop stars who wanted to go underground. Was there a kind of mutual envy?
None whatsoever, no. I think it was mutual admiration, certainly from our side there was admiration. I mean to this day... I just met him at the airport about a year ago and he just kind of shambles up and says, Hey Paul, y'alright man, and we give each other a big hug. I was in Heathrow and he was. He had an anorak on and had the hood pulled up. He was really like a kind of bagman, you know. And he just kind of shambled up to me, Hey Paul, alright man.
He seemed very attracted at that time by the idea of being a pop star, the suits, the screaming women...
Well I think he found something attractive about that. I don't really think it changed his stuff an awful lot. I don't know, there might have been some feeling that it was time for him to get off the street and into the hotel or something. I don't know.
That was the time when your music had the most in common, Revolver and Blonde On Blonde. You almost crossed over at that point.
Well, he influenced us and a lot of people. He influenced the Stones. Sympathy For The Devil is very Dylan, just the endless lyrics. I remember us being round at John's house at Weybridge, when I went round to write once, and he'd just got Like A Rolling Stone and we put it on and it seemed to go on and on forever. It was just beautiful. I don't know if he aspired to that showbiz thing you were saying but he showed us all that it was possible to go a little further. But the nice thing about Dylan for me was that he brought back poetry. We'd come from that student scene, 'cos we'd all started as students, you know - I was a kind of sixth form layabout, John was at the art school next door - and we'd started out with things rather like poetry readings in Liverpool. Hamburg was a student scene. There were kids in Hamburg who called themselves The Exies - The Existentialists - and wore a lot of black; Astrid and Jorgen and Klaus, they figured they were Exies. That was one of the sad things about The Beatles: we got so huge that that kind of student thing got cut short, but Dylan reintroduced that into all our lives. I always thought of Dylan as a poet first - him and Allen Ginsberg holding up signs, all very hand-held camera from New York, all very enigmatic.
You were never in awe of each other?
Oh he wasn't in awe of us. He just liked "I get high." As the guy who introduced us to smoking dope he just thought it was hilarious! I always like those sort of things, it's like Jake Riviera thinking "living is easy with eyes closed" was "living is easy with nice clothes". They're always better, those adaptations. But John was probably the most influenced. And George is one of those guys who can quote all Dylan's lyrics. There's always a lyric for an apt situation: George goes, Oh well! Remember! The pumps don't work 'cos the vandals took the handles! George knows the whole works of Dylan. But I think John was the most influenced in the vocal style. Certainly You've Got To Hide Your Love Away is a direct Dylan copy, it's like an impression of Dylan, Yeeew've got to hayed... that lerv ay-wayyy. Just saying ay-wayyy, rather than away...
Did John ever mention that car ride with Dylan which was filmed for Eat The Document?
Mmm?
You know, when the two of them got driven around Hyde Park with Pennebaker filming them?
Well he might have but not at length. We didn't really chat about that too much. I know he was very keen on Dylan.
There's a great bit in the film, when he's in the car with Dylan and it's five in the morning, and Dylan's drunk and completely out of it and threatening to throw up and John says: Do you suffer from sore eyes, groovy forehead or curly hair? Take Zimdon!
Zimdon! Ha ha ha. Zimdon! Well that's nice stuff, but he turned on the whole Zimmerman bit and made a lot of fun of Bob later.
When do you mean?
Later, you know. I got a feeling...
He recorded those Dylan parodies in the '70s, didn't he? [There are tapes of three of them - Serve Yourself, an acid response to Dylan's You've Got To Serve Somebody, the equally self-explanatory Mama Take This Make-Up Offa Me, and a spontaneous moulding of the live TV news into Stuck Inside of Lexicon With The Roget's Thesaurus Blues Again.]
He did. He always had a go at people, John. That was really part of his charm. He was ballsy enough to have a go at you, you know, then he'd lower his little glasses, look at you over the top of them and say, It's only me! John was the mouth. He was a lovely boy but he did shoot his mouth off. Quite often.
Why did he have a go at Bob?
I think he was quite disappointed that his name wasn't Dylan. Finding out that it was a Jewish name that he'd changed I think he felt a bit betrayed. I remember him making quite a stink about that.
But he must have known that from the start.
I'm not sure we did. No. I think we sort of found all that out later. He had a go at everyone then. Including, probably most of all himself. That's who the real go was at. You know, to understand John you had to sort of look at his past. The father leaving home when he was three. Being brought up by his aunt. And his mother, you know. It's extraordinary he made it to the age he made it to. So John had a mighty chip on his shoulder - we all did to some extent. John could say to you, Fuck off yer twat. Then he'd just go, Only kidding! You had to accept that he could swing both ways.
Why did he feel so let down by Dylan?
He loved Dylan so much. He did feel a little let down. John was like that. John like gurus. John was always looking for a guru. When he introduced Magic Alex who was just some Greek guy who was a bit of an expert in electronics. And I remember John coming round to my house and saying (mystic voice) This is my new guru, Magic Alex. And you had to sort of smile a little and go, OK well that's cool, Wow, knowing that this may not last. But... John had found a guru.
Was it the same with Dylan? You know, he wanted to sit at his feet?
Yeah. I think he did worship Dylan to some degree. He was certainly the big one. There was Elvis before that... but Elvis was a different kettle of fish. Elvis was going to shop us on the Nixon Tapes. That's another story...
I want to hear it!
You know those Nixon Tapes that he kept rolling all the time? There's a set of tapes were Elvis is trying to shop The Beatles. (Courteous Southern accent) "You know, Sir, They're very un-American! I believe they smoke drugs!" Elvis! Telling Nixon! He's trying to get made a marshal, trying to get made a US marshal.
Have you heard this tape?
No, I've just seen a transcript of it. It's quite wild. 'Cos Elvis is ryng to shop us. No doubt about it. Definite bad move, El!
That's hysterical!
It is, it's wild! You've got to laugh. But as I say, I think to John these people were great heroes and he found out a little later they were only human. Think about the Maharishi. We all went off with this guru and John got very let down and wrote Sexy Sadie. He was always doing that, he was always having an idol and seeing it knocked down. If you think about it it's probably very symbolic of his whole life, the father figure. Yoko in a way was a father figure. Hate to say it. But John always required that. Complex boy. He was a lovely boy but, perhaps, you know... idols with feet of clay. John always wanted people to be magic and, you know, we're all human.
What did he see in Dylan?
Inspiration, maybe. I don't know. Maybe that he allowed us to go further. He allowed the Stones to go further, then we did Pepper and we allowed everyone else to go further, It was like boots walking... we'd take a step, Dylan'd take a step, Stones'd take a step, we'd take another step, John'd take a step. I'd take a step, I'd do Why Don't We Do It In The Road?, John'd go, Fuck, I wish I'd written that...
Which of John's songs would you like to have written?
John's? Oh... if forced on the point I'd have to say, Help, Imagine, Strawberry Fields. But it doesn't matter, all in all, here we are, born, die, and on the way stuff happens. John did some magic stuff, Dylan did, Stones did, all of us have from time to time. I remember Dylan defending one of his loose vocals - some critic somewhere - by saying, (nasal whine) "Listen man there's an A in there somewhere! It goes from A flat to B flat but it goes through an A. Every note's in tune!" You know, there is an A in the middle of it somewhere but he just chooses to go around it. Great! Rules are meant to be broken.
So do you think he's deliberately 'deconstructing the myth'? How many opportunities has he had to reach a larger audience - Farm Aid, he was the final act of Live Aid, The 30 Year Tribute concert? The last two were absolutely appalling.
I think he does it on purpose, you know. He does it on purpose. I know someone played with him in one of his latest bands - G.E. Smith, New York guy - and I said, How is it, man? And he said Oh great! He said, We'd come up to him after a show and say, Fantastic man, Tambourine Man went down so beautifully, and then he wouldn't do it for two weeks! But I can see that...
Keep a good head and always carry a light bulb!
Yeah, it was nice, all that stuff. But the only pity really is that it's all closed up, like Moses passing through the waters, the Red Sea. We all got through it all, it tended to close up when everyone's got through it. Now it's re-opening a little bit. The modern scene's getting a little crazier again, but it's all a little bit corporate now. Very corporate. Sickeningly so. And you know it wasn't that way before. And he was one of the catalysts in the whole movement.
JOHN LENNON
Extracts from interviews broadcast in 1979 on New York's 1027WENW radio in The Lost Lennon Tapes (interviews by Jonathan Cott, David Shepp and Jann Wenner).
You first heard Dylan on a visit to Paris in 1963?
I think that was the first time I heard him at all. I think Paul got the record (Freewheelin') from a French DJ. We were doing a radio thing there and the guy had the record in the studio and we took it back to the hotel and (gauche accent) fell in luv, like!
Do you still see Dylan as a primary influence on your writing?
No, no. I see him as another poet, you know, or as competition. Just read my books which were written before I'd heard of Dylan or read Dylan or even heard of anybody. It's the same, you know. I didn't come after Elvis and Dylan, I've been around always. But it I see or meet a great artist, I love 'em, you know. I just love 'em. I go fanatical about them - for a short period. And then I get over it! And it they wear green socks, I'm liable to wear green socks for a period, you know.
You've Got To Hide Your Love Away and I'm A Loser?
Yeah, that's me in my Dylan period, 'cos that's got the word 'clown' in it. I always objected to the word 'clown' - or clown image that Bowie was using 'cos that was always artsy-fartsy - but Dylan had used it so I thought it was all right and it rhymed with whatever I was doing. So that was my Dylan period.
So you were saying, If Dylan can go it I can do it?
No, I'm just influenced by whatever's going on. It's the same as if Elvis can do it, I can do it. If the Everly Brothers can do it, me and Paul can do it. If Goffin and King can do it, Paul and I can do it. If Buddy Holly can do it, I can do it. Whatever it is, I can do it!
How would you characterise your relationship with Dylan?
Whenever we used to meet it was always under the most nerve-wracking circumstances. And I know I was always uptight, and I know Bobby was. And people like Al Aronowitz would try and bring us together. And we were together and we'd spend some time but I always used to be too paranoid or I'd be aggressive or something and vice versa. He'd come to my house - can you imagine it? This bourgeois home life I was leading? - and I used to go to his hotel. And I loved him, you know, because he wrote beautiful stuff. I used to love those so-called protest things. I loved the sound of him. I didn't have to listen to his words. He used to come with his acetates and say, Listen to this John, did you hear the words? And I'd say, It doesn't matter, you know, the sound if what counts, the overall thing. You don't have to hear what Bob Dylan says, you just have to hear the way he says it. Like, the medium it the message.
Your appearance in Eat The Document was a little edgy.
I've never seen it! I'm in it, you know! Frightened as hell, you know! I was always so paranoid. He said, I want you to be in this film and I thought, Why? What? He's going to put me down! It's gonna be... you know and I went all through this terrible thing. So in the film I'm just blabbin' off, just commenting all the time like you do when you're very high and stoned. But it was his scene, you know, that was the problem for me. It was his movie. I was on his territory. That's why I was nervous, you know. I was on his session.
MOJO (November 1993)
#bob dylan#the beatles#george harrison#paul mccartney#WHERE IS RINGO#john lennon#bob&george#also:#john&paul#because there's a lot of john in the paul interview (of course)#yoko in a way was a father figure#the interviewer telling paul john's joke and paul loving it#a lovely boy#a complex boy
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XII - The Hanged Man, Upright: surrender, sacrifice, faith, perspective
#hsr aventurine#Penacony#2.1 spoilers#honkai star rail#fanart#everyone's new favorite sad boy#i am no exception#i haven't had the fanart bug this bad since Zhongli#what is it with hoyoverse and creating men perfectly tailored to my tastes??#i can't#i had no plans on drawing him or his intricately complex outfit#but then i had a thought#on how well this card fit him#and then i was doomed...#tarot cards#tarot#the hanged man#(no he's not dead. i really dont get why so many people think he's dead)#my art
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I was looking through your art and i noticed you labeled some of them Malleus Draconia Vanrouge
And ajsjdkr that made me so happy 😭💖🥹
I thought only me and my friends were the only one who called him that. It l was such a happy surprise 🩵💞
Sorry if it’s weird to say, I just wanted to mention it 👉👈

Lilia, stop being in denial.
#answer#twisted wonderland#don’t be sorry x3#love your ask very much!#we should be more!#we do love a granpa suffering some ptsd and complex#how i wish for lilia calling his boys ‘sons’ at the end of the Dias chapter#lilia vanrouge#silver vanrouge#malleus draconia vanrouge
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Writing Prompt #13
"So?" Red Hood asks, arms crossed. "Was I right?"
"Yes," Phantom says, deepening his voice, "this is one of mine."
"One of your what?" Robin growls. Nightwing's hand on his shoulder is the only thing keeping him from invading Phantom's personal space, which, please, continue to do so Mr. Nightwing, Sir.
Phantom would take a deep calming breath if a) he wasn't trying to appear as otherworldly as possible which means no human breathing and b) if that wouldn't so obviously telegraph how uncomfortable he is in the Batcave surrounded by the entire Batfamily.
Next to him Red Hood shifts in slight discomfort. His ties to the spectral realm mean he's picking up on Danny's unease even if he can't fully translate the feeling. Which is good. Danny needs to maintain what little control he has over this situation.
"There's a gh-spirit in my...realm," Phantom says, letting himself drift gently to the other side of Batman's medical table which just coincidentally puts more distance between him and the the rest of the clan staring him down. Black Bat leans forward and he violently suppresses a flinch. "They're known as Nocturne. They wield power over dreams. Their signature is all over this."
And Danny means that literally. Their ecto-signature couldn't be more apparent if they'd written it in sharpie across Batman's suit. This is what Jason—Red Hood, because Danny couldn't have been dealing with a simple civilian case of ecto-contamination, nooo, he's got to have connections to the superheroes Danny has spent the better part of his afterlife avoiding—managed to pick up on, even being the low level entity that he is.
At which point he'd called Phantom in, even though Danny had spent the better part of two weeks trying to intimidate the guy into never contacting him, Ruler of the Spirit Realm (lightning crash!), again, but here is his calling card just in case (thunder and creaking noises!!), but again, you should never use it unless things are very serious, OoOoOoOo~~~
Damn it. It's been like 10 days.
"So how do we fix it, Your, uh, Ghostliness?" Nightwing says, ducking his head in a sort of half-assed supplication when Phantom turns to him. Nightwing glances at Jason for affirmation who shrugs out of the corner of Danny's eye.
"Phantom is fine," Danny says, waving his hand and letting his upper lip curl in an expression of distaste. "Remember, it's like you're Vlad when Dad offers him a glass of eight dollar wine!" Jazz's voice reminds him. Robin growls lowly, likely meaning he's nailing it. He looks away dismissively ("Honestly, it's like you're Vlad, anytime, ever." Sam notes dryly) and thanks god he doesn't have a heart in this form because it would be beating so loud right now.
Beside him, Jason scratches compulsively at the back of his neck. Huh, his anxiety is manifesting physically as an itch. Good to know.
"You can't fix it," Phantom says. "I can."
"At what cost?" Red Robin asks. "Red Hood mentioned you'd want something in return?"
Frick. His other contingency to keep Jason from ever contacting him again. Phantom had lightly hinted his taste du jour was, uh, souls.
Something Red Hood has apparently let slip, because now Robin shakes off Nightwing's hand, puffs out his chest and declares "I will trade myself for my father's safe awakening, Spirit!"
The other members burst into denials which almost covers up Danny floating sharply back and saying "What? No!!!"
Key word: almost.
Danny coughs as they stare at him.
"That is to say, I have no desire for a child," he puts a bit of snarl into it, showing fang. The mood in the room plummets drastically as Nightwing gently grabs Robin by the arm and pulls him back to his side.
"We see," he says. He steps forward more assertively, placing himself in front of the others, all of which are now eying him warily. "Then, is there a gender you prefer?"
It takes a second to click in Danny's head and then he swings his head wildly away from his audience to hide his reaction, nausea and embarrassment turning his face bright green. "Fika Kristo," he mutters in Esperanto as quietly as he possibly can, pinching the bridge of his nose.
He gives himself a moment to settle and game plan before turning back around. "I have no desire for any of you, and it matters not. In this instance, a deal need not be struck. Nocturne is my subject, and they have done this without my permission." Danny blinks, eyes widening. "Not—not! that I would give them permission to do such a thing. In the first place. Ahem."
"Okay...so you'll do this for free?" Jason asks. "Seems like a bad business practice since you also fixed me up for nothing—"
"What he means to say, Your Majesty, Phantom, is thank you!" Signal says in a rush as Nightwing starts, "Wait, Hood, what do you mean—"
"Enough!" Phantom says loudly (nearby bats take off and Jason's itch migrates to his forearms) "I have little time," read: he has a test tomorrow and he's only one-third of the way through the study guide "And I grow tired of this...dilly-dally." Frick! Is that an old-timey word?
"Of course. Thank you again, Phantom." Nightwing says stiffly, eyes still narrowed in Hood's direction.
"Wait, sorry, Phantom, Majesty, I'm Spoiler by the way," the purple-caped vigilante Danny already knew was Spoiler says. "How do we keep this from happening again? To any of us? Is there a way to defeat this Nocturne?"
"Moreover, why Batman?" Red Robin asks. "Why would a spirit from another dimension want him asleep?"
Phantom sighs. "Nocturne was trying to send a message. To me. Through you," he says, nodding at Red Hood. "They...how do I put this. They like attention. Being the spirit of uh, dreaming, they don't receive that attention. And you were in my realms for quite some time. And they wanted...attention."
The lackluster explanation sits for a moment before "They were jealous? Of me?" Red Hood asks skeptically.
"It's more complicated than that. Your...physiology," Danny puts it as delicately as possible, watching regretfully when Red Hood still stiffens at the mention, "Is particular. You gather attention in our realm. And having my attention is...special. But not!" He says to the group at large, a touch panicked, "Romantic!"
Jesus, he's never gonna hear the end of this from the others.
"Anyway, I will ensure it does not happen again."
"By paying them attention," Spoiler says under her breath, wiggling her eyebrows at Black Bat, Red Robin shooting them both a glare. Nightwing ignores them in favor of staring at Red Hood and Phantom. Danny is unsure what Red Hood has disclosed about how he knows Danny, but now he feels confident the answer is close to nothing.
Before Nightwing can ask whatever uncomfortable thing he's about to ask, Phantom disappears. Invisibly, he hovers over Batman's sleeping body and silently apologizes for the intrusion before intangibly slipping into Batman's REM realm and finding the man...oh...
Probably thirty minutes later he reappears to the group, who all perk up at the sight of him. Their eyes bounce from him to Batman; who does not move, to the monitor; which shows no change in his brain activity.
"I'm going to need your help," Danny says to Jason, getting to the point.
"Why? What can I do?"
"It's easier if you come with me," Danny says, grabbing his arm.
"Come with—"
Danny wastes no time in turning them both invisible and flying them into Batman's mind.
"What the—" Red Hood twists and turns, taking in the hallways of the manor. From afar, they can hear the tinkling of a piano. "You, I had your word—"
"This isn't where you think it is," Danny says hurriedly. "We're in your—Batman's dream." He walks quickly down the hallway, towards the music. Jason follows.
"What?"
"The way to break a dream spell is to wake the dreamer. You can't do that externally so you do it internally. Usually you wake the dreamer by turning the dream into the nightmare, scaring them awake."
The hallway stretches on longer than realistic, the dream attempting to divert them. But it can't outrun Danny. His power seeps into the halls, ice creeping along the paneling and freezing the way behind them.
"Batman, however, is hard to scare."
"So you want me to do it."
"What? No." Phantom shoots him a confused look. "Why would I—Ahem, The other way is to convince the dreamer they are dreaming. They break the dream themselves."
"Alright..." Jason says slowly, now keeping pace with him. His breath forms a cloud as he speaks. "And you think I'm the person to do it? I'm not the one he listens to you know, that's more Nightwing's schtick, or hell, anyone other than me."
"This isn't just Batman's dream, Jason," he says. Hood's eyes narrow at his real name, but now the truth is necessary. "This is The Dream. The perfect life. Everything he could ever want."
They're approaching an opening on the right side of the corridor. A bright light emanates from it, alongside the noise of stumbling piano keys and laughter, deep and male and unrecognizable. The Dream.
"Thomas Wayne," Jason breathes. "You want me to convince Bruce it's worth walking away from the center of his universe? It'd be easier if I put a bullet in their chests."
Danny stops abruptly before the doorway, turning to face Jason.
"You know, I fixed you," he says, head cocked. "Those feelings you felt, you shouldn't be feeling them anymore."
"I...I don't."
"Then why do you act like it?" He lets himself drift up, reaching beyond their planes of existence and extending a metaphysical hand to Jason's spirit. It shivers away. "You don't have to hide behind what was."
"I'm not hiding! And I don't have to explain myself to you!" He tries to move forward but Danny puts a hand out and he cannot move past it. He growls in frustration.
"I'm grateful to you, but with or without the Pits I'm fucked up. This is just who I am. This is just what he made me."
"You've never asked why I look like this. But did you know my form is malleable?" Phantom says, letting his legs shift into a tail, letting two eyes become three. "What I believe is what I am."
And then he takes several steps back, putting the doorway between them. "From here on out, the Pits can't tell you how to think or feel. Your decisions are wholly your own. Starting with this one."
Jason stares at the doorway, then Danny.
"I won't make you," Danny says simply. "And if you desire, I will retrieve Nightwing instead."
Jason scratches at his arms, grits his teeth, and stomps through. The light resolves into the sitting room, massive windows letting in sunlight so bright it streaks yellow-white across the room. Bruce sits on the maroon versailles couch next to Cassandra, who sits cross legged, excitedly watching Alfred pour her a cup of tea. To their right, in the open space, Damian barks instructions at Tim on handling a katana. Stephanie and Duke sit on the ground besides the coffee table, homework sheets sprawled across the surface, suffering their way through a calculus problem.
Bruce, smiling softly, looks across the room to where the atrocious playing is coming from. Red Hood follows his gaze.
Sitting at the piano, trying to play while Dick distracts him with a pair of chopsticks, is Jason. He puts a hand on Dick's face and shoves, both of them hitting the wrong keys.
"Get—away—dumbass!"
"No, see, it's a duet! Jay!"
"That's not why it's named—" and Jason Todd-Wayne tips his white-tipped head back and laughs.
#batman#danny phantom#dp x dc#dp x dc au#dp x dc prompt#dp x dc crossover#jason todd#red hood#batfam#nightwing#danny is not aware of the complex family dynamics that make up the Batfam and it is costing him dearly#danny: boy you got issues huh#also danny: not my circus not my monkeys#as always anyone is open to build on these#for instance: does bruce know he's in his perfect dream?
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It's just so narratively crunchy that Spite writes poetry as his chosen form of self expression. Especially given that he clearly struggles to communicate with the people around him, the fact that he writes poetry in the scant moments he has command of Lucanis's hands really cements other textual indicators that Spite is frustrated by his difficulty with communicating. Over and over again he asks to talk to Rook, to be heard, but when he does get the chance to talk, he isn't understood, which must be unbelievably frustrating for the poor guy. So he practices! In writing! And that writing gives such a neat look into Spite's mind and how he conceptualizes himself and his situation. So I'm gonna dust off my English degree and yell about his poetry.
1.
a PEACE
cut from the ALL
golden stranded weaves
PROTECTION CAGE
keep them OUT
keep me IN
As with all poetry, there's a lot of room to interpretation, and I think that's especially intentional for Spite's worldview as a spirit. He's from the Fade, which operates on perception and emotion instead of concrete immutabilities like the material world. That being said, I think this first poem is Spite trying to process and talk about a.) his own violent summoning from the Fade and b.) Lucanis's mental Ossuary.
Spite was ripped from the Fade against his will, a piece of a larger infinity cut and captured. Likewise, Lucanis creates the Ossuary in his mind as a (poor) coping mechanism for dealing with what happened. Spite recognizes this as an attempt to create peace in emotional turmoil.
The golden stranded weaves evoke the imagery used in the narration explaining how the dagger cuts through the Veil. It's visually represented as gold geometric lines separating the Fade from the material world, which may be a hint to how spirits see the Veil: a barrier made of gold strands that has also stranded Spite from the world he knew. Given that Lucanis's mind Ossuary is also a part of the Fade, this same barrier applies here as well, stranding him and Spite from the freedom they seek.
The Veil and the mental Ossuary therefore function as what Spite calls a "protection cage," designed both to keep its occupants safe and keep them contained. Arguably, Spite could also be talking about the magic that keeps him bonded to Lucanis, magic that is likely similar in nature to how the Veil works given that blood magic is what sustains both. Protecting Spite and Lucanis from being hurt further by the Venatori but also keeping Spite from going home. He's stuck in Lucanis whether he likes it or not. This is further complicated by the mental Ossuary, which Lucanis has unconsciously constructed to keep the people he loves out of harm's way (protecting them) while also keeping Spite trapped.
This is Spite's first cry for help. He recognizes that he is trapped in multiple ways: he is forced to share a body that aggressively does not want to share with him, and the part of the Fade that Lucanis is connected to mentally is also a prison, one that does not respond like Spite would normally expect the Fade to respond. Lucanis mentions in Sea of Blood that "The Fade does whatever a spirit wants. Real walls and chains, not so much," but Spite tells Rook in Inner Demons that he can't touch the locks in Lucanis's mind despite it technically being a part of the Fade. My personal theory is it has something to do with the blood magic that bound them together in the first place, but regardless of why, it's understandably extremely frustrating for Spite to feel trapped both in the material world and the Fade, neither of which respond to him as he expects. To Spite, it must feel like the very laws of physics have stopped working as they should.
2.
scentsing the BEYOND
rememburnings from before
when one was infinity
not a small shade
not a SHARP hooked claw
in a gut
takemeouttakemeoutletmeout
riiiiip
Here we get to see how Spite has been learning to use language to artistically express complex abstract ideas, which speaks to him having mature, adult intelligence, given that abstract thought is a marker of higher-order cognition. In this poem, Spite is no longer simply describing his situation as he is in the first poem, he is self-reflecting and forming his own identity.
It's clear in this first line and in several points throughout the game that Spite's favorite sense is smell, possibly because it is a sense that he can unintrusively access and therefore isn't barred by Lucanis. So he is not just sensing, he is specifically "scentsing" what he calls "the BEYOND," likely the Fade, referencing his ability to pull things from it (especially considering that the little icon on an accessible spot says "a sense of something").
But he's not just talking about the Fade as a place, he's reminiscing of the Fade as a time. But the portmanteau he uses here, "rememburnings" suggests an attempt to explain the emotion he associates with this remembrance. The memory is painful. It burns. It hurts him. He remembers being a part of the Fade, being part of "infinity," and now he is only a "small shade" of what he once was.
But that's not all. He's also demonstrating that he understands how Lucanis perceives him, sees that he is hurting Lucanis. He knows that he was force-fed to Lucanis (quite literally according to his banter with Bellara where he says it happened when "They fed me something. Like he was a parasite in uncooked meat."), which explains why Spite conceptualizes himself as being a foreign, damaging object "in a gut." And, importantly, he doesn't take satisfaction from that. The tone he is using here suggests grief and desperation, especially the "takemeouttakemeoutletmeout." He wants to be free, yes, but he also wants to stop being an object of pain. And yet the last line suggests that Spite knows that separation would also be painful. It would be another ripping, because he is a claw now. As much as he is trapped by Lucanis, he is embedded in him as well, and extraction would tear them both apart.
3.
toes wiggle
when he drinks the brew
a small shade
and a wounded spirit
sitting
there is STILL
we are still
there is an INFINITE
there is a SHELTER
there is a STORM outside the center
UGH Spite your MIND!!! This poem makes me want to cry fr. It's so much more concrete than the other two, showing how he's becoming more familiar and comfortable with Lucanis's body and the material world. The tone is gentle, like a relieved sigh, with none of the urgency and desperation of the others. This is the first time we see Spite describe a physical sense other than smell. He notes that Lucanis wiggles his toes when he drinks his favorite coffee, suggesting that this is something Spite feels as an occupant of the same body, though he likes to manifest himself as separate. It confirms that he feels what Lucanis feels through shared senses, though has his own interpretations of sensory input.
Spite still conceptualizes himself as a "small shade," but no longer is he a "SHARP hooked claw." He is still hurt, still affected by what he and Lucanis went through, but he now sees Lucanis as more than the body he's trapped in. He sees Lucanis as a fellow "wounded spirit," hurting and healing in the same way that he is. They are sitting together, feeling together, and they have found stillness. They've finally made peace.
While he may no longer be a part of the Fade as he once was, Spite has found that being and living with Lucanis is another "INFINITE" that he gets to experience. He is safe, sheltered in their bond. It's no longer a cage. It's just protection now. And while Spite can feel the absolute mess that's going on with the world and the Fade and everything they're dealing with, he is centered now with Lucanis, which makes it all manageable.
All this leads me to believe that after Inner Demons and their little coffee date with Rook, Spite and Lucanis are at a point in their relationship where Lucanis is much more accommodating of Spite and where Spite is able to explore and experience the material world with a certain level of patience. He no longer feels like he has to bully Lucanis into letting him pilot because he understands physical space now and can experience things alongside Lucanis as he experiences them. Lucanis is more confident letting Spite speak through him because he's no longer worried Spite will wrest complete control from him and/or do something to hurt them. As Lucanis says in the final romance scene, they're no longer afraid. Lucanis now trusts Spite's reports about what happened and how much time has passed while he was asleep, which suggests that Spite has earned that trust.
At this point, the line between demon of Spite and spirit of Determination seems extremely blurry at best, and it really makes me wonder if gaining a physical body through means other than normal possession allows spirits to develop more complex cognition and emotional versatility beyond just their purpose.
#I am extremely normal about spite and think about him a normal amount (lying)#He's just so complex and interesting and it Bugs me when he gets reduced to either “little gremlin cat” or “horny foil to lucanis”#My boy did not bust out three beautiful poems for this sort of treatment!!!#dragon age#datv#da4#spite dragon age#lucanis dellamorte#lucanis#spite dellamorte
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The crop this year sure is yeilding a lot of
Farm Boy Charm™
#just trying something more complex#took like 4 hours lmao#hey!!#Jax is a good boy#(no he isn’t)#the Best Boy#(untrue)#(lies)#tadc#the amazing digital circus#lookout boy there miGHT BE A CORN#jax on the cob#tadc jax#jax
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A scenario that was literally in my head this morning when I woke up: Hajime taking Fuyuhiko to a quiet corner to explain that he’s going to run and draw attention so everyone else can actually start living their lives, and Fuyuhiko being equally disbelieving and furious that Hajime thought they’d actually let him.

If he thinks anyone is letting go then obviously they just need to hold on harder
#an art#fuyuhiko kuzuryu#hajime hinata#Miggy the way I verbally lose it over our samebrain concepts can only be put in tags#Would he be more pissed off (how dare you think so little of everyone (me) as if we (i) would EVER let that go quietly)#Or more shocked (did we (i) not make it clear enough? This whole time you thought you were that expendable?? Did I make you think so??#(Hashtag peko reference. Is it fate to never be able to express how much someone means to you? Is it fate to give your self up for an ideal#Get slapped in the face with LOVE bitch you have a group of the most insane people in the world willing to risk it all for you#Like even before the Everything. These ppl are unwell about you Jimmy. You don't understand how special you are according to the FTE wiki#And ofc. I wouldn't be me if I didn't say.#'There is no life without you yours and mine are irrevocably entwined and if you go i go don't die without me' etc etc#^continued: 'you OBTUSE GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKER DO I HAVE TO SPELL IT OUT FOR YOU I-L-O-V-E-Y--'#the lobotomy is strong but the inferiority complex is stronger#Thank u Miggy u have turned over the soil in which my brainworms reside I'm gonna munch on this a while#I have an apartment to myself (!!!!!!!) and I fully plan on getting super high and focusing on My Boys. As fertiliser for my soil#I love making worm refs hehehehehehehehe#Cereal please (don't) look inside...
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There's a common thread in Charles' impulsive decisions
He possesses Esther in episode one because he dragged himself up from the ground to see that Esther had knocked Edwin across the garden with her cane. So he did whatever the fuck he had to do to make that not happen again.
He grabs the vase in episode two because they're on a deadline to get back to Niko, and he smashes it because the skeleton grabbed Edwin and he had to get its hands off him.
He knocks the Night Nurse into a sea monster in episode four because she put him through his own hell, and then she threatened to do the same to Edwin.
He abandoned his afterlife despite Edwin's protest that that is not how you make decisions, based on however you happen to be feeling in the moment, because he means to spend his afterlife the same way he spent his life: putting himself between other people and the bad shit.
Charles is impulsive, yes, but he's impulsive specifically because he's protecting his people, protecting Edwin, and sometimes that means you have to act fast.
#Charles *is* impulsive but seeing someone in danger#ESPECIALLY seeing Edwin in danger#before rushing in without hesitation... is a real pattern#Charles is obviously capable of complex planning but in the moment that's not the role he assigns himself#He throws himself into the fray so that Edwin has breathing space to take care of the logistics#Yeah possessing Esther was a bad call in the long term!#but it gave Edwin the chance to get to Crystal and get out#DeadBoyDetectives#Dead Boy Detectives#Charles Rowland#payneland#paineland#DBDA
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he is in a strange house and he's just a little boy
#bean juice my precious son and boy#had to stay at a friend's place for a few hours while they gassed the fleas in my apartment complex
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redesigning my headcanon for Sebek's parents, based on important new information (SCALES)
(you can't see it but they're both wearing crocs)
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#they are truly the most inspiring love story of our generation#though i guess he's not dr. zigvolt since zigvolt is the clan name...#unless he took her name which i absolutely could see. why would you ever not want to be called zigvolt.#this does tie nicely in with my headcanon that sebek's siblings got more of the fae features than he did#and he has a Complex about it#i get the impression that sebek's siblings are much closer in age to each other and also have more of their dad's chill#so sebek is sort of the baby of the family and he's got a Complex about that too#i think a lot about the zigvolt family for characters who have never actually appeared#on the subject of actual canon though#i do actually really appreciate that both sebek and silver each had a little moment of reassuring each other#that this is 400 years ago and also incredibly unfortunate circumstances#and present-day reality lilia and baul love them very much#(i do think sebek is secretly baul's favorite grandkid)#it was just nice to see! especially from sebek! he is sometimes a very thoughtful boy and it's always nice to see that side of him#sebek trying SO hard to get baul to like him though 😭#and lilia being like 'aw i think you're getting kind of fond of him :)'#i love. Characters.
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Nishimura and Kitamoto being so protective over Natsume so early on really gets me... They saw this weirdo quiet kid with empty eyes like glass beads and went "i have a feeling this guy is a victim of bullying and needs friends and by god that friend is gonna be ME"
#i love them sm#i love season 5 and 6 man we get so many complex outsider POVs of natsume and even things that have nothing to do with him#these are all just people with different backgrounds and complex motivations#and their tying string is natsume-- a boy who is strange but kind.#its an endless feedback loop of kindness#natsyuu#natsume yuujinchou#depths' watches
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How did Elesa get a Blitzle as a starter if she's from Sinnoh? (hang on this is ironic she could've learned about warden ingo in school back there)


Blitzle Elesa backstory under cut!
Blitzle was gifted to Elesa so she has an “easier time” integrating into Nimbasa by her well meaning dad. This is not the greatest move, since the two feel they are more obligated to stick together then, you know, actually choose each other. Blitzle’s meant to be a utility mon— he helps charge elesa’s hearing aid batteries and basically serves as an emotional support when things get rough. He’s… not the biggest fan. (I like to imagine Blitzle was originally part of a battle track, but his IVs aren’t the greatest so they shuffled him out. He’s a bit bitter about that.)

Inciting incident where they actually start taking the proper steps to becoming partners is when Elesa takes a tumble down a hill and Blitzle twists his foreleg going after her. (Local child eats shit! More at 11.)





They’re just kids, and they’re still learning.
(When Elesa decides to challenge the gyms, Blitzle’s so excited he accidentally trips their house’s circuits.)
((As for Elesa hearing about Warden Ingo, well… that’ll be a future issue.))
((DIRECTLY INSPIRED BY THIS ASK!! TY @scarftale-bryan ))

Yes. YES.
MASTERLIST FOR POKEMON CONTENT:
#boom you get sketches#elesa and blitzle are like. the exact opposite of emmet-tynamo and ingo-litwick i think#while those two WANTED to make things work elesa and blitzle for the longest time just shared the same space and resented each other for it#they’re BETTER now but like… the beginning week was rough#(slaps blitzle) this mf has so many fun traits to project on him. inferiority complex? caretaker burnout? oh BOY.#pokemon#art#sketchbook#hesitant to tag this submas because no patrat children make an appearance#so i shall simply not#myart#ask#mailbox#elesa#blitzle#pokemon elesa#gym leader elesa#pokemon trainer#pokemon bw
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I'm 98% sure that this has been done numerous times before,
#i went in intending to make a complex background including the whirling-in-rags geometrical wallpaper#until i realized halfway through that actually i don't care and just copy-pasted shit from the og meme#dont look too hard or you'll see where i stopped putting in any effort lmao#disco elysium#harry du bois#harrier du bois#kim kitsuragi#buzzfeed unsolved meme#buzzfeed unsolved#disco elysium fanart#i've connected the dots#discoposting#id in alt text#video games#krita#artist on tumblr#fanart#quirki art
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Dora-posting
Lyrics from the second pic are from "Apricots" by Findlay
#disco elysium#my art#catori draws#hdb#de harry#de dora#dora ingerlund#dolores dei#harry du bois#been frustrated with the way I color my stuff recently#idk it just looks really...bland? muddy? to me#I want the colors to be a bit more expressive? or complex maybe#this is a bit better but I don't think I'm where I wanna be at yet in regards to color composition#described#image desc in alt text
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I've praised George Rextrew a lot for the emotion he put behind various actions, and I stand by that.
But I also want to take a moment to appreciate Jayden Revri's ability to handle Charles' more explosive emotions.
In the Devlin house, you watch his anguish and anger build in equal measure. Unlike the characters, we get to see the build-up to the outburst that leads to him getting stuck in the loop. The first time he sees that man murder his family he wants to look away, he tries to look away. You can see how much it hurts him, but he turns back and watches anyway--and the horror turns to rage.
When the Night Nurse comes, he fights her off--very aggressively yes, but they didn't see what he did when she took him into his memories--and everyone looks at him like...like he's a bomb that may go off again? Like they've never seen him before?
The boy's just been through some of his most traumatic memories and committed an act of violence that probably only made that experience worse, and he sees his friends looking at him the way he'd always feared they would--like he's a bad guy. And Jayden portrays that grief and pain so beautifully.
And when he gives that little "no" while he's crying and jerks away from Edwin's outstretched hand?
My heart feels like it's been squashed and wrung out.
#dead boy detectives#charles rowland#jayden revri#those sort of emotions can be hard to portray because they are so complex and explosive#you have to portray the build-up with subtlety#and then...explode...and that's EXHAUSTING#that kind of emotion takes so much out of you#Everyone on this show is so GOOD
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Kim Please Be My Friend: The Game
#disco elysium#kim kitsuragi#harry du bois#this game is dragging me out of my art slump#(yes I know the game is a lot more than that and that the story is super complex etc... etc... I just think this dude is neat)
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