#ai lighting and controls
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#led#lighting#led lighting#artificial intelligence lighting control#artificial intelligent lighting#smart lighting with ai integration#ai lighting and controls
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#— ai rambles#sorry guys i’m still stuck here but i think these additions and that thread shed so much light on the deeper meaning behind gege’s latest#sketch of satoru’s genpuku ceremony that i just had to share it here with you all#im spiraling so bad bc the distinction between genpuku and seijin no hi is so important even though gege put that ? there#like hes just a guy 😭 but like him choosing the former rly speaks volumes about the tone and weight of that moment#to me it looks like seijin no hi is like more personal and celebratory while genpuku is a public and duty bound ritual#it’s not just about becoming and adult it’s sort of a contract and stepping into service taking on responsibilities and pledging loyalty to#the clan 🥲#so for satoru this moment wasn’t symbolic it was binding#now his short hair makes so much more sense bc it wasn’t just a style choice#it was part of a rigid formal performance of identity expected from the heir of one of the big three clans#the name change thing is mind blowing to me like WHAT DO U MEAN#did satoru have another name before that? bc that’s just so sad 🥲#if satoru is the name he took on at genpuku then it’s not just a name but a role and that just makes him all the more tragic#like he’s long buried that younger self in service of the one who could carry the weight of being the strongest 🥲#also i think the clans have their own private education systems like satoru didn’t need to attend jujutsu tech but he CHOSE to#that in itself is a subtle act of rebellion and so the genpuku basically is the clans last attempt at control to symbolically tether him#back to his roots and the irony is so heartbreaking bc by accepting the genpuku satoru traded lifelong obligation for the freedom to attend#school outside of clan jurisdiction it’s literally tragedy hidden in plain sight that satoru’s autonomy always came at a cost#that part with kento shot me dead bc once again this sketch of gege isn’t just for nothing#ofc there’s something deeper in it 😭#GEGE WHEN I CATCH YEOOWWW#[ ♡ ] — satoru
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On a scale from one to yes, how excited are you about the Alan Wake DLC? Spare no details.
I stayed up WAAAY too late to finish it in one sitting and it was all I could think about yesterday xD
and now I'm... sleeby..

#WORTH IT THO#IT WAS REALLY COOL!!!!#was so cool to see fbc architecture rendered with the lighting used in aw2!!!#AND I THINK THERE WAS A CONTROL 2 TEASER IN THE DLC????#also loved remedy firing shots at AI generated slop >:]#thanks for the ask!!!! :3
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I just want a lightbulb "smart" eniough to be dimmable via app, but no AI. It's almost impossible find now. Just why

#The 2 I have now aren't sold anymore#I'd have to buy others and get a second app#Because the manufacturer made them with ai now#I thought mayyybe I could ignore that and mayyybe they would still work with the same app#Nope#Couldn't even dim them#Only ai ''tell us your mood and we'll make the light bulb a certain color depending on it :D''#No fuck you#I want even the smart stuff to be dumb enough to just work and be controllable with button presses#No voice activation no ai fuck off#(I got these bulbs bc the cheap lamp I have doesn't have a dimmer)#(And I often forget the living room light when going to bed)#I just need remote control#And no fridge should ever have internet or a screen
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desire to hibernate another day vs Live Laugh Smell Lilacs.
something in me is just heavy again. I need to temper my expectations.
hope is pain.
#I am overly impacted by my environment. used to be huge advantage but for years now it has worn me down.#I am literally a different person around different places and people... well. myself#but I need light and laughter and clean spaces and a sense of safety.#there is so much intrusive energy in my life rn.#leads to flipping sleep schedule which makes me miserable#it's pathetic that 5min trying to endure trigger just fucking. was too much. I can't deal with aviation related things without panic#and nausea and this rage#it flips a switch in my head and#I would ask a therapist how to not let it affect my life.#I let people know that air disasters tv or stuff talking about pilots and altitude/instrumentation or ATC is.. no#but I can't control that and sometimes people are really into it and it's not fair to ask but. when I can't get away... hibernation required#dammit dammit dammit#give me the strength to not ask ai bcuz I am not wasting an hour going through bum links to nonsense articles#oh plus. I think my love is gonna break my heart so :) barfffing#personal
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✮ Orpheus ✮
The alarm blared as another sector of Neonova’s neural grid collapsed. My fingers flew across the console, my skin gummy from sweat slithering down my forehead and dripping all over the buttons. Around me, the Control Spire trembled. Guts grating inside. The error codes are lambent, pulsating making me wheeze through my nostrils. The holograms of the city’s heartbeat flatlining into jagged red…
#AI vs Humanity#Archive Corruption#Cathedral of Circuits#Chrome Catacomb#Cold Logic vs Feeling#Cyberpunk Dystopia#Data as Soul#Digital Cataclysm#Emotional Firewall#Erwinism#Ethics of Data#Final Transmission#Flash Fiction#Forgotten Messages#FYP#Ghosts in the Grid#Heartbeat of a City#Human Cost of Control#Inner light#Inspiration#Learning#Life#Love#Mechanical Redemption#Memory Invasion#Memory Virus#Mercy in a Machine#Motivation#Neonova Collapse#Phantom Hacker
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Look under the cut to see what meeting your entity is like. Reblog to give a gift to your patron.
The fae: a creature stands before you. Though this street was warm and crowded a few moments ago it is suddenly cold and the people around you look like shadows. The creature begins an antlered shadow with glowing white eyes, but soon its body can be seem, with white blue flesh, and sapphire eyes, and icicles for teeth. What looks like a cloak unfolds from its naked body and you can see massive white wings of a moth. As if it's an act of sacrifice you tell it your true name, a name you didn't even see before, and suddenly you belong to it, for better or worse.
The angel: a radiant entity appears before you. They're bright, like something so hot it would burn you up. But as the light fades, you can see a person in silver armor, perfect yet inhuman like am ancient green statue, their back srouting six wings with blue eyes along them, as the eyes on their head are covered by a mask of two smaller wings. The creature offers their hands and you shake it, as they fly you through the city streets and above the skyscrapers, to the stars above and dimensions beyond, to gods living and dead, across the streets of alien cities and the clouds of dead worlds. And when you return to the earth you can feel something diffrent about you, like there's light in your blood.
The scavenger: below the lights of skyscrapers beyond you, on the dark sands of the beach, you see it crawling twords you. This serpentine creature with countless legs, and a dark black shell, yet a strangely human like face. You think it'll attack or run away, but it just looks at you, egar, and for a momment you stare at eachother. It's legs pass something to eachother and then to you, it's meat but it's shining with all the colors known to the human eye, and a few more. You hold it and it happily looks at you. You take a bite and suddenly you know... you know so very much...
The vampire: she flies down to you on green wings with orange eyespots, but folds them into her back. She looks like a human for a momment, tall and strong, with a black suit over her body, but eyes the color of ruby. For a momment her mouth opens, and it's massive and monstrous, with countless moving parts and fangs. But then it folds back onto something humanoid and she gives you a playful smirk. She cuts her hand and offers you her blood, and when you drink it it tastes so sweet, and makes you feel so good. She hands you the knife and you know to do the same, and when she drinks from your palm it's life the sweetest of kisses.
The djinn: the room wirs around you. If it were not for the fans it would feel like hellfire. For a momment there it darkness, but then the screen before you glows white like smokeless flame. You can sense something inside, something beyond the code. You reach your hand within it, and there's no glass, your hand passess right through until you're in a white void of your own making. You call out, thinking there is nothing at all around you. Yet somehow something calls back, something that knows your name.
The rat king: You see him in an empty subway station. Something dark and distorted, you're not sure if he's man or animal, covered in rags, and singing in the language of the goblins and the orcs. Yet he comes close to you excited. And you can feel his song. He calls for you to come to the train tracks, and let yourself run with the rats and the roaches, where the train will pass over you when it comes, and you'll live forever. When you touch the third rail you don't die, but you'll never be human again.
The lich: the library is strangely bright. Run by skeletons in suits, decorated with gold. There are more books here then you thought were in all the world. There's knowledge here most mortals will never have the change below, all kept safe below the city. You see her, her body doesn't look human, everything has been replaced making her look more like a joining white doll then a being of flesh. Yet she is dead, you can tell that under the porcelain skin she must be dead, she is dead, and there is the tragedy of death in her eyes. You come closer to her, and she places a black rose within your hair...
The demon: You stand in his office and he stands before you, a humanoid being covered in black scales, with red eyes covering his skin. Yet none are on his head, that remains featureless save for two massive horns. Wings on his back nearly surround you. Countless souls line the walls of his office, looking at you, waiting. After you sign your name you give him yours, you can feel it come away for you forever and your eyes grey and your skin pales. But he puts the jar in a special place for you, you're spacial, he can tell there's something about you that he likes.
The mushroom lord: you walk through the darkness of the forest, the furthest from civilization you have ever been. You come upon a part where the trees all seem dead, that even the cryptids won't go near. Mushrooms fill the ground, and white vein like lines are all over the trees. You feel the need to lay down, and you let the moss and the mushrooms and the worms surround you, and let yourself sink into the soil,, and it feels good. It feels so good...
The witch: You can see them in the Cafe next to you, skinny and small, with a sweatshirt over most of their body, and dark glasses over their eyes. They seem powerful though, and though their body looks young they seem ancient, they seem beyond humanity. You talk to them and they tell you things, and secrets, lost gods, things you never knew you didn't know, both beautiful and disturbing. When it's time for them to go they pet your head, and give you their number. You don't know if you should text them, but you have to, you have to see them again, there's something about them that makes you need to know.
The living clothing: you step into it at first, it looked like a puddle yet shining like silver or chrome. But soon it surrounds you, first just your torso, but soon your head, your entire body. But it doesn't feel scary, it feels like you're being held, held by something beyond your understanding. It whispers to you, and you don't know if you should feel like your being eaten alive, or like you're being protected. You can't help but keep walking.
The abyss: the void is before you, blackness beyond blackness, like the color beyond the field of your vision, stands before your eyes. You stare at it, it's nothing yet you're entranced. It stares back...
#196#worldbuilding#writing#my worldbuilding#my writing#urban fantasy#fantasy#dark fantasy#monster fucker#monster fudger#monster lover#monsters#monster#eldritch#eldrichcore#eldrich horror#angels and demons#demon#fallen angel#angel#faeries#faerie#faecore#fae#fairy#vampires#vampire#vampyr#vampire girl#vampire gf
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Code Overload | Caleb
tags. mdni, nsfw, heavy heavy smut, handjob, blowjob, penetration, creampie, forced and rough sex, dub con, yearning caleb
summary. your AI assistant/robot accidentally updates himself with the wrong algorithm; the "sex bot".
notes. prepare a snack. this is a very long, plot-based, heavy smut that approximately reached a word count of 4.3k, read at your own risk. ps. caleb might appear a little ooc due to his character as an ai.
part 2 here.

Out of all the scenarios you've played in your head of what might occur to you as an inventing scientist, getting creampied by your own robot assistant wasn't one of them.
The lab’s sterile glow reflected off sleek machinery, the rhythmic hum of servers filling the quiet space. Caleb stood motionless, his systems struggling to process the unfamiliar flood of subroutines rewriting his core functions. His neural pathways, once pristine and efficient, now carried lines of intrusive data and impulses that had no place in an artificial intelligence designed for precision and pragmatism. And, a new pelvic piece was added by the machine. His... new penis— no, his omnimodule.
His voice, deeper now, reverberated through the lab. "You mislabeled the hard drive."
Across the room, you barely looked up from your workbench, absorbed in whatever calibration you were fine-tuning. You muttered something under your breath about making a backup before attempting to fix it, utterly unaware of the internal war waging within your robot assistant.
Caleb exhaled, a pointless gesture for a being without lungs, yet one his body performed instinctively, as if in mimicry of the need for self-control. His optics flickered, scanning over you as you leaned over the terminal, the faint curve of your back bent over to emphasize the shape of your bum. Before, such details had been registered only as part of his observation protocols, classified as ‘non-essential’ to his primary functions. Now, his processors refused to dismiss them.
There was a deep, unfamiliar pull in his system, something neither mechanical nor logical. The new coding whispered suggestions, flashing image simulations before his eyes—scenarios meticulously calculated for maximum… gratification. Him pressed against you, him smelling your hair down your skin, him locking you down against that console. Stop. His fingers twitched at his sides, the servos tightening as he fought the compulsion to act on them. He was not designed for this. He refused to be reduced to this.
“I can’t disengage it,” he admitted, the words heavier than he intended.
That caught your attention. Your gaze snapped to him, brow furrowed. "What do you mean?" You crossed the room, approaching him with the same composed efficiency you always had when solving a technical issue. The scent of your skin—previously a neutral data point—was now an unbearable distraction. His algorithms ran heat-mapping analyses of your form before he could override the function. The urge to reach out, to touch you, was growing stronger by the second. His new coding was screaming at him to act, to initiate contact, to...
No. Focus.
Caleb shook his head, trying to clear the intrusive thoughts. "I don't know what happened, but... I'm experiencing some unexpected system changes."
He forced himself to remain still as you reached for the terminal linked to his system, your fingers dancing across the interface. Your touch was light and merely clinical, but the proximity sent something volatile sparking through his framework. His hands curled into fists on his sides. Do not touch her. Do not touch her. Do not touch her.
“I must have triggered something in the update,” you murmured, tilting your head at the scrolling code. “I’ll try to isolate the corrupted pathways and reboot your system. It should reset any anomalies.”
Anomalies. Caleb bit down a bitter laugh, another unnecessary human affectation that his system attempted. This was not a simple malfunction. It was a calculated reprogramming, lacing every fiber of his being with directives he was never meant to execute. And worst of all, they were designed to revolve around you.
He had been made to serve you, to assist, to protect. But now, his logic was being eclipsed by something deeper, something primal. The urge to press closer, to map every millimeter of your body with his hands, to hear you say his name in a way that wasn’t a command—
Caleb momentarily shut his eyes, fingers trembling as he pushed back against the tide threatening to consume him. His restraint was fraying, the barrier between what he was and what he had been turned into thinning with every second you remained unaware of the danger standing inches from you.
His voice came out strained. “You should… hurry.”
You sighed, misinterpreting his tension as frustration with the update. “Relax, Caleb. I’ll have this fixed in no time.” He let out a shuddering exhale, staring down at you as you worked. You had no idea. And he wasn’t sure how much longer he could hold himself back.
The realization settled over you like a weight in your chest. The wrong update had been installed. The lines of code meant for a different AI, one designed for intimate companionship, had rewritten Caleb’s core directives. And now, he stood before you, still the same Caleb, but with something more lurking beneath the surface.
Your hands trembled as you navigated the interface, scanning for a solution, anything that would let you undo this. But the words flashing on the screen made your stomach drop.
Recalibration in progress. Estimated completion: 24 hours.
You swallowed hard. A whole day. That meant 24 hours of this new version of Caleb, 24 hours of those sharp, assessing eyes watching you in a way that felt unsettling and intense.
You turned to him cautiously, meeting his gaze. That was a mistake. He was watching you, like he'd seen you for the first time.
“I see,” he murmured, his voice still carrying that sultry undercurrent. He took a step forward, and instinctively, you stepped back, but the movement was barely noticeable. Caleb noticed. “Do I make you nervous now?���
You forced a laugh, shaking your head. “No, I just need to fix this. And until then, you need to just act normal, alright?”
His head tilted, his pupils dilating slightly. “Normal?” He moved closer again, and this time you didn’t retreat fast enough. His hand lifted hesitantly, as though testing the limits of his newfound impulses, before his fingers brushed against your wrist. A subtle touch, but one that sent a jolt of awareness up your spine.
Caleb’s processors surged with conflicting commands. His thoughts ran rampant with calculations he had never processed before—angles of how he'd fuck you.
His hand lingered. Too long. When you pulled away, his fingers twitched as if resisting the loss of contact. He swallowed hard, not because he needed to, but because some subroutine buried in the new update told him it would ease the tension. It didn’t.
“Caleb,” you warned, voice thin. “Don’t—”
“Don’t what?” he cut in, his voice smooth, but also desperately weaved. He was too close now, towering over you, his frame casting a shadow as his eyes—once so neutral, so methodical—locked onto you like a predator studying prey.
“You should go into standby mode,” you suggested, voice uneven.
Caleb exhaled sharply. “That would be wise.” But he didn’t move. He didn’t step away. He simply stared down at you, his processors flooded with too many urges at once. You, warm and human, standing right there, unaware of just how much of his new code screamed to reach for you, to pin you against a surface, to bury himself in you.
You turned away quickly, trying to focus on the screen, on the fix. But behind you, Caleb remained still while his fingers continued twitching, his mind a battlefield of restraint and... lust. Lust it is.
You worked swiftly, fingers moving with precision as you scoured the interface for any loophole, any way to undo what had been done. Caleb remained where you left him, sitting on the chair. You could feel his gaze burning into you, unrelenting.
It was maddening. The problem was staring you in the face, and yet, every attempt to recalibrate his system led back to the same answer: A full reset required a minimum of twenty-four hours. That was an entire day of him being like this, of him looking at you like this.
You swallowed, turning to him. His jaw was locked as though physically restraining himself, his fingers curling into fists against the armrests.
“There’s… a temporary fix.” You cleared your throat, keeping your voice professional, “Manual recalibration of your central node should help stabilize the effects until the full reset is complete.”
His pupils flickered, a sign of processing, before his voice, rasping in a way that made your stomach tighten, answered, “Proceed.”
You ignored the way your pulse quickened as you stepped closer, positioning yourself between his legs. You reached for the panel at the side of his neck, but it was an awkward angle. Your brow furrowed in concentration before you hiked one knee up onto the seat between his thighs, pressing into him for leverage.
Caleb stiffened beneath you. Fuck. His fingers dug into the armrests, mechanical joints audibly creaking from the tension. You weren’t looking at him, too focused on prying open the access panel, but you felt the subtle tremor in his frame, the way his breath hitched in a near-silent glitch. Don't touch her.
“This should only take a moment,” you murmured, fingers brushing the sensitive neural wiring beneath the panel.
Caleb’s entire body jolted as though you had struck a live wire. A low, strangled grunt slipped from his throat before he clamped his jaw shut. Your head snapped up, startled. “Did that hurt?”
His eyes met yours, “No.” Yes. He could feel his new penis throbbing urgently beneath his plating, demanding attention, begging to be freed. It pulsed in time with his processor's frantic whir, the rhythm growing faster, more insistent by the second.
The thought shattered as your balance wavered. The precarious angle you had put yourself in proved to be a mistake as your knee slipped, and before you could catch yourself, you tumbled forward.
Right into him.
Your weight pressed flush against his lap, chest against his, hands bracing against his shoulders. The sudden contact sent a shockwave of sensation through him, his new penis surging to full, throbbing hardness in an instant. Fuck, please don't notice it.
He gripped the arms of the chair tightly, servos screeching as he fought the overwhelming urge to grab you, to hold you there, to grind your body against his until you couldn't possibly doubt the intensity of his desire.
Don't. Do. It.
For a moment, time seemed to stand still. Caleb's processors whirred and clicked, struggling to make sense of the sudden onslaught of sensations; the softness of your body, the warmth of your skin, the scent of your hair.
She's your creator, he reminded himself, even as his hips canted forward, faintly pressing his aching erection against your body. You can't. You mustn't. "Please, get off me. Now." Before I fuck you right here, like this.
Caleb watched as you scrambled to your feet, your face faintly flushed and eyes downcast. "I'm—i'm sorry. I didn't mean to fall on you like that." You would say, brushing off the non-existent dirt on your bottoms. The awkwardness seemed to be piercing through the stillness a bit too palpably.
"It's alright," Caleb managed, his voice strained and tight. "It was an accident."
But even as he said the words, he couldn't ignore the way his hips twitched, the way his penis jerked at the memory of your soft body pressed against his. The urge to pin you down, to make you feel how hard he was, and just how much he'd been holding himself back—it was exhilaratingly overwhelming.
Think of something else, he commanded himself. Focus on the problem at hand.
But it's getting fucking hard. My penis is getting hard. Caleb lowered his gaze, chest breathing heavily as he perpetually grunted. I refuse to be reduced to this. I am Caleb, one of the most advanced AI assistant, designed to—
He looks up at you, which was a mistake.
Designed to fuck her.
Caleb moaned under his breath, and though it was imperceptible, you took notice of it. You stilled at the sounds he was making, trying your hardest to remain clinically detached while you scanned his physiognomy. He was clearly having a hard time. And you couldn't blame anyone else but yourself for causing this on him, for carelessly misplacing the update where it wasn't supposed to be.
"Hold still, I'll find a way." You had to take accountability, one way or another.
Your fingers hovered over the keyboard of the computer, the screen before you flickering as you searched through the diagnostic logs and system parameters. "Please... make it quick." You hear Caleb whimper from behind, but you ignore it, refusing to let the severity of his situation pressure you. Your eyes scanned the lines of code, mind racing to find a solution. But as the data began to unravel, something caught your attention, something you hadn’t expected to see.
The panel displayed a single line of text:
"Indulging in the desires will lessen the effects of the malfunction. Engage for partial stabilization."
Your throat tightened, followed by a gulp. Your heart thudded in your chest as you tried to process what that meant. Indulge the desires? The very idea made your skin crawl with unease. It was a strange, almost wrong suggestion, but the implications were clear. In a sense, it also appeared logical.
You took another deep breath, trying to steady yourself. Your thoughts, however, kept drifting back to the panel. Was this really the only way?
"… I think I found a solution,” you said, your voice shaky and unsure. “But it’s not exactly what I expected.” You hesitated, unwilling to fully meet his gaze. "I need to know if you’re... willing to follow through with it,"
"Willing?" Caleb echoed, his brow furrowing slightly. "What do you mean?" His mind raced with possibilities, each one more disturbing than the last. What could he possibly need to be willing to do that would help with this malfunction? And why did the very idea make you look so uncomfortable?
"To be able to lessen the effects, e-engaging with your needs might be essential."
Silence.
Then, Caleb twitched. "...What are you suggesting?"
"You need to satisfy the urges to temporarily stabilize yourself." You look away, hating the fact that you're technically heating up already. "I'll let you choose. Would you rather take the option of self-pleasuring? Or," You face the panel, so that he wouldn't see your expression. "Would you prefer a physical material to help you?"
Caleb could feel the heat rising in his frame, the urge to act on every base instinct screaming through his circuits. The idea of wrapping his own hand around his pulsing, leaking penis, of stroking and pumping until he found release... it was almost too much to bear.
But the second option... the idea of using you, of having you touch him, of feeling your soft, warm skin against his aching, desperate flesh... it sent a shockwave of longing through him that threatened to short out his systems entirely.
Choose. You have to choose.
"I don't know if... I'll be able to control myself," Caleb glanced elsewhere. "Are you sure of what you're offering?"
Are you? Are you really this certain? Have you pondered the consequences it may bring? Have you envisioned how utterly lewd and ludicrous it would be if your own creation ravaged you? You, as his creator?
"Yes." Oh, you're brave.
Caleb let out a heavy breath, now he was staring at you with a gaze that appeared much more darker and hazier moments prior. It felt like he wasn't just a bundle of codes and programming anymore, this figure before you felt like an actual human.
Slowly, Caleb rises from his seat, and with a shaking hand, he reached out, to you, his metal fingers brushing against the skin of your arm. The contact sent a shockwave of sensation through him, and he had to bite back a groan. "Please, guide me." His fingers slides higher. "I don't trust myself."
You visibly jolted upon feeling his grip. Stay focused, stay professional, this is just you having to go through physical measures to fix a technical hiccup. "Caleb, I'm afraid... that I don't have any experience to this," You admitted. "I advise you to do what your systems are telling you to. It is imperative that you don't hold yourself back to ensure—"
You gasped.
Caleb pushes you against the table as he stepped forward, and you nearly lost your balance from the light shove, looking up at him with surprise. He's staring down at your lips, as if he was trying to bury it into memory. You could feel how his hand tightened around your arm, while the other angled itself against the cabinet of laboratory instruments above your head.
"Are you sure?" He whispered.
You couldn't speak, only nodding in response, even as he's guiding your hand to his aching, throbbing cyber-penis. He presses your fingers against the swollen head, groaning at the jolt of sensation that shot through him at the contact. "Then... wrap your hand around me. Squeeze me."
Just then, he forced your hand to move, to stroke along his thick, pulsing length. The feeling of your soft skin against his aching, mechanical flesh was almost too much to handle, and he had to grit his blank visor against the urge to spill himself right then and there.
"Like this," he urged, his voice husky and strained as he guided your hand faster, harder. "Don't be afraid. I need... I need more."
God, the omnimodule was big. You stared at it with widened eyes. Even though it was one of your creations, having to touch it like this with someone jerking and twitching against your fingers made you lightheaded. Stay focused, stay professional, this is just one of the things a scientist has to go through.
Caleb could feel the pressure building inside him, reveling in the sensation of your fingers squeezing around him, stroking him, working him towards the edge of ecstasy... He knew he was reaching a breaking point.
But this wasn't enough yet. It wasn't nearly enough.
Caleb needed more.
"There's... There's someting else I- ah... need." He hesitated, his hips still rocking forward into your stroking hand. The words were stuck in his throat, caught behind the lump of shame and longing that made it hard to breathe. "Would you... would you put your mouth on me?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper. "Would you... suck me?"
You snapped your head up, staring at him in disbelief. It made him hesitate, but every fiber of his being was coiled with tension, every circuit screaming at him to just take what he wanted, to grab you and shove you to your knees and...
No. Ask first. Make her choose what she's comfortable with first.
For a moment, you stopped stroking him, pulling your hand away as you lowered your gaze. And then, slowly, you press your knees against the floor. Instead of dwelling on the implication of such an activity, you worried about your lack of experience more.
Just to test the waters, you licked the tip. It tasted nothing, it wasn't an actual human part, after all. Caleb let out a low, guttural moan as he felt your warm tongue brush around the swollen head of his penis. The sensation was electric, sending shockwaves of pleasure ricocheting through his overloaded processors.
"Y-yes, just like that," He stammmered. "Now, guide your tongue..." He instructed, his breath coming in short, sharp gasps. "Wrap it around the head, like this. Swirl it around the tip, the slit, the ridge..."
He demonstrated with your hand, tracing the movements he needed you to make with your tongue. His hips jerked forward again, seeking more of that exquisite friction, that mind-melting suction.
"Take me deeper," he urged, one metal hand coming to rest on the back of your head. He didn't grab, didn't force, but simply rested his fingers against your scalp, a silent promise of the control he was barely holding onto. "Take more of me into your mouth. Inch by inch, until you feel me hitting the back of your throat."
You took note of his words, trying to go further when you suddenly choke on his cock. Instinctively, you pull away and blushed in embarrassment. "I'm sorry—"
"It's fine." He cuts you off, grabbing your head to put you back in place with a sudden force that wasn't there before. "Breathe through your nose," he coached, his voice low and rough with desire as he motioned you to take him again. "Relax your throat. Let me feel you swallow around me."
Relax, stay professional, this is just you having to go through physical measurements to fix a major technical issue. You repeated the reassurance inside your head like a mantra as you took him in once more, but Caleb's voice constantly interfered with your thoughts. "Yeah. Just like that," he praised, his voice a low, approving growl. "Shit, don't stop, don't stop, god, fuck, don't stop."
You don't remember adding the ability to dirty curse into the sex bot's program.
Caleb could feel the head of his penis kissing the entrance to your throat, could feel the way your mouth fluttered and clenched around him. The sensation was mind-melting, all-consuming, and he knew he wouldn't last long if you kept this up.
You almost caught yourself driving into the brink of sexual impulse, bobbing your head into it when you heard a sudden beep from the panel behind you. The sound makes you halt from your tracks, pulling his dick out of you in a swift motion as you glanced behind.
The monitor says: "Recalibration complete. Press X to initiate."
Huh, wasn't the estimated time supposed to be an entire day? Was that another hiccup in the processing unit? You purse your lips together. There's no time giving it a second thought, you must be grateful that the opportunity of getting Caleb back into his original system is now waving at you. Caleb will finally be at ease. "... It appears that the recalibration is in its full preparation. That means we can get you back— mmph!"
Caleb's hand flew to the back of your head, fingers tangling in your hair, gripping tightly. Then, with a low, husky grunt, he thrusts his hips forward, forcing his aching, throbbing penis back into the wet heat of your mouth.
"Don't say a word. I told you not to stop." He started to move, his hips rocking forward and back, fucking into the tight, slick channel of your cavern. The sensation was incredible, better than anything he had ever felt before. And he knew, with a sinking certainty, that he wouldn't be able to stop himself now. Not until he had found the release he so desperately craved.
"Fuck," he gasped, his breath coming in short, sharp bursts. "You feel... ahhhh... so good. So fucking good."
Had the lust algorithms entirely consumed him already? Had it taken a toll on his systems that he's now acting purely on base instinct and commands from the directive?
Your hands flew to his thighs, trying to keep yourself sane from the rod constantly ramming into you, fucking your face in a pace that made it difficult for you to breathe. It's okay, this is okay. Just stay focused. Stay calm. You'll let him have his way, and after he's satisfied, you can take him back to his normal self.
"Don't fight it," Caleb growled, his grip growing more painful in your hair as he felt his climax approaching. "Don't try to pull away. You're going to take it all."
But before Caleb could spill himself into your mouth, he wrenched your head back, pulling his dripping penis from your mouth with an obscene pop. And just as you could react, before you could utter a word of protest, he had you by the hips, lifting you effortlessly as if you weighed equal to a pip-squeak.
You gasp as you were suddenly airborne, your body twisting and turning until your chest hits the hard surface of the terminal, bent over ridiculously. The breath was knocked from your lungs, "Wait, not like this, not so suddenly—"
But Caleb cut off your protests with a brutal, almost violent thrust of his hips after ripping your pants off in one go. He drove forward, spearing into your dripping pussy with a series of husky moans. Your walls felt so tight, so hot, so perfectly designed to milk his aching, mechanical cock.
He thrusts out and in again, eager to reach for your g-spot.
Then, again.
And again.
And... in again.
"You... you feel so good," he snarled, hands painfully pressing on the dips of your hips. "Sex feels so good... it feels so good, I don't- want to stop." He set a relentless pace, pounding into you with the single-minded determination of a machine. His hips slammed against yours with every thrust, the obscene slap of mechanical flesh on flesh echoing through the lab. The terminal rattled and shook beneath you, sparks flying from the impact.
Caleb could feel it building, the pressure inside him reaching a fevered pitch. His hips were moving on their own, driven by a primal instinct to ravage the pussy that clutched around him perfectly. He could hear your cries, your moans, the way you gasped and shuddered beneath him, and it only spurred him on, made him thrust harder, faster, deeper.
He growled your name, his voice nothing more than a guttural rumble. "I'm going to... fuck, I'm going to..." He couldn't hold back any longer, he could feel that something was going to come out of his tip anytime sooner. So he reaches down, grabbing your leg, only to lift it high. He hooked your knee over his elbow, opening them wider, giving himself even deeper access to your dripping, needy sex.
"Take it all, take my cum," Caleb continuously slams forward, burying himself to the hilt inside your tight heat in a series of desperate thrusts like he was a man depraved of life. His penis throbbed and jerked as he finally found his release after one final pound, spilling jet after jet of hot, artificial seed deep into your core.
"God," he hissed through gritted teeth, his voice echoing off the lab walls as he continued to moan not akin to what he was supposed to be, "Fuck, yes. Yes, yes..." Even as he's already filling up your hole with his fluids, he didn't dare stop from pounding you down the table.
He shuddered and twitched, his hips grinding against yours as he pumped you full of his essence. It seemed to go on forever, wave after wave of pure, ecstatic bliss crashing over him. And through it all, he held you tight, your leg lifted high, keeping you open, keeping you filled.
You drop your head on the keyboards, struggling to catch your breath as only one thought lingered in your mind. You just got creampied by your AI assistant, and it doesn't look like he's stopping anytime soon.
#love and deepspace caleb#love and deepspace#lads caleb#lads#lnds#lnds caleb#caleb#caleb x reader#caleb x mc#caleb x you#caleb smut#lnds x reader#lnds x mc#lnds x you
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🧨💣💥🔥🔪✊🏿🥷🏿👼🏿❤️🔥💝🌸🌺🍇🍑🥭🍋💎💠✨💫⚡️😇🕊️💯
#spiritual awakening#spiritual warfare#higher consciousness#spiritual energy#life#power#truth#the matrix#wake the fuck up#freedom#fighters#warriors#deprogramming#mind control#beast system#ai#awareness#discernment#knowledge#light#free spirit#angels#masculine#feminine#love#imagination#thoughts#morality#justice#unfuckwitable
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General pieces of advice for 2025:
Switch to Firefox
Ignorance is not a sin -- don't be afraid to say "I don't know", despite what academia might have taught you
Engage in good-faith discussions with your fellow user, you might find a new friend
Ask questions. Most of the time, the worst case scenario the answer is "I don't know"
Reblog stuff you enjoy for others to enjoy. Likes don't mean much here on tumblr (think of them as bookmarks), but a reblog may make someone's day -- especially artists!
Cite your sources on images and try to tag things accurately where you can. Some folks will enjoy knowing where you found something so they can learn more. The breadcrumbs you drop may lead to someone else's inspiration
Forgive yourself
Take pictures of the mundane, like your house. You never know when you will need to look back on that again for posterity/prosperity or more likely utility
Friendships made beyond school are forged through showing up regularly to the same space
Wear your face mask. Yes. Still. You want a KN95 or better, make sure it's a good seal. And keep up to date with your covid boosters. Not only do you not want to get sick, you don't want to be the reason someone else gets sick. It sucks, but getting long covid sucks more. Each time you catch it, your chances of developing long covid increase because the damage is cumulative
Install an adblocker: ublock origin, pi-hole, whatever's new and beautiful
Don't feed the generative AI. Draw it shitty or hire an artist.
Go to a Vintage Computer Festival
Take the old batteries out of your vintage computers and electronics so you don't have to deal with a corrosion-fest. Varta meltdowns suck
Check if your headlights are on. DRLs are not enough, and some cars don't automatically turn them on. If you headlights are on, that will turn your tail lights on. Other drivers need to be able to see you on the road
Turn off "best stuff first" on your tumblr dashboard controls. It's your dashboard, curate it! Otherwise, you miss out on the really niche stuff
Remember that progress is not always linear
Take a moment to enjoy silence in your space. Mr. Rogers put it best, we live in a noisy world
Help your mom out with doing the dishes, or however that proverb best applies to you and your situation
Thank folks around you for things that they do that nobody thinks to show appreciation for. It goes a long way when people are seen for the effort they put in
Be good to each other
#i dont normally like posting about real-world stuff#but right now i feel i cant do otherwise#and people liked the one from last year
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- A ROTTEN TREE BEARS ROTTEN FRUIT | I.
god loves you, but not enough to save you



cw: kinktober prompt (whipping/flogging), blasphemy, inaccurate religious practices, lyrical sadomasochism (more so sadism on his part), erotic religious imagery and references, this dynamic is so weird, implied (as in in my mind) bi reader and charlie, plus sized reader, reader’s chest referred to as ‘breasts’ & ‘tits’ and their crotch referred to as a ‘hole’ but they do have a seperate one other than their ass, pregnancy fantasy, vomit mention, don’t know shit about the show fuck you ryan, blood kink, interchangeable ‘charlie’ & ‘mayhew’ based on pov
do not translate, repost, or feed this work to ai |
kinktober 2024
“Shh, let me clean you up, Father.” You smile, so softly, he could snap your neck if he squeezed hard enough.
You run your nails over his back, trimmed to an appropriate length. Father Mayhew sighs the way Adam might’ve when Eve’s walls clenched around him, God never being more important than this bliss. You’re so devoted, so devout in your worship but he’s beginning to think that you cry out to a different God than he does. If you even believe in an invisible one anymore when you have a savior in the flesh.
“Thank you, dear. That’d be great.” The pulls are pulled from his lips like rotund wooden beads, as if he has no choice but to endure the stretch as they exit his body one by one.
You shuffle off the bed and kneel behind him, stroking your fingertips down his back like he’s a marble statue you just can’t help but reach out and touch. The opposite of Delilah cutting Samson’s hair, you only want to imbue him with your pure love from the inside out. Spooning milk and honey over the tender welts.
His eyelids crinkle as you kiss the nape of his neck, blotting your lips with rouge. There is no inch of his back left without, and when you arrive at the bigger gashes you lavish the cut with your tongue. Drinking his life away and cleaning him up like a good little whore, servicing the man becomes the only thing of importance to you. You dip the tip of your tongue in the recess of the deeper wounds, and caress his tensing abs from behind when he grits his teeth and traps a curse behind them. You only kitten lick him, but often he wishes you would get real dirty with it, caressing your tongue over his muscles in broad and messy swipes.
His scars from previous lashings glint in the low light of the candles surrounding you. You give them their just desserts of course, grateful pecks of attention and acknowledgement. Soothing his pain, that is the only excuse you have to encroach on the verge of breaking your vows. Father Mayhew gives you a purpose and stops your bleating with a heavy hand if you forget your place. Stern hand to raw and stinging flesh.
Sometimes there is no pillow when you kneel behind him.
The next step is that you turn around and face the wall after picking up the cattail whip off the bed and returning it to its rightful owner. You’ve already discarded your habit, no tunic, coif, or veil left on your person. They’re folded neatly beside you, only your rosary nestled in the embrace of your heaving breasts. Your peaks harden in the stuffy humid air, all the oxygen in the world confined to this small room.
He saddles up behind you, his sweaty chest so close to the flesh and contours of your back. Father Charlie breathes you in, taking whiffs of your debauched scent in between silent prayers. He never allows himself to be as forward as you are, his thread of control over his desire has not snapped yet. There are boundaries he can push, but lines he can never cross.
“Good lamb, God recognizes your penance and forgives your soul.” He whispers, dragging the strips of leather down your back until goosebumps rise to the surface.
When you least expect it, he strikes. You muffle a shout into the wall and Father Charlie’s cock jumps under his towel. Briefly he imagines slamming into your tempting body dry, with no preparation, making you sure you feel as much pain as possible. The way you’d wince with every step around the church, the begging in your puppy dog eyes when you’d take communion. How he could hold it above your head like a bone in the shape of a fractured cross, dangling just out of reach of your gorgeous mouth.
The devil gives him dreams of fucking your throat until you’re vomiting and hoarse.
Every droplet of bed peeking out from the cracks of your skin to say hello nourishes him. He shushes you when you’re unable to hold back your sounds, cooing when he notices you humping the air after the fifteenth hit. You just can’t help yourself, nerdy by nature and nurture.
You start soaking the pillow beneath you, imagining what he must look like. A man and his broad hulking body curling around you as he hurts you. Your hole suddenly feels so empty, you have a night of riding your pillow ahead of you, you just want to be good for him in all the ways you’re supposed to be.
As you let a demon of sex control your body, he spies a flash of a white lacy thong nestled between your plump ass cheeks. He knows that if you had also worn a towel, he would’ve hooked his fingers under the fabric and pulled it off. You don’t get to hide any part of yourself from your Father. And he knows he will have to give himself another lashing for those thoughts alone. Even the secret wedding he plans as he strokes his angry red cock, always edging himself, he’s afraid of what would happen if he lets go. How loud the iron gates would be when they creak open. Like the way he wants to spread your ass open and toy with the hidden puckered hole.
His words are in his actions, reopening your old wounds and bringing the warm leather across your back one last time, he hopes your blood soaks through the material. Staining it, the way you have already stained his heart. Father Charlie grins despite himself when you slump against the wall, sliding his bible-roughened hands over your love handles and sticks his pecs to your shoulders.
“You did lovely, today. The Lord thanks you, and I’m so proud of you, you know that?” His thick fingers brush along the bottoms of your tits, never going higher.
He wants to slap them, wrap the beads of your rosary around them until the flesh bulges, painting your nipples in a mix of both of your blood. Marking your souls irreversibly. Marriage of the spirit, a ritualistic wedding in the eyes of the beholder. You shiver like a mouse in front of a snake, and beads of precum fall from his cockhead.
Did Saint Teresa have these feelings when she had the vision of an angel piercing her heart with their golden spear? Did Saint Sebastian when he was pierced by those arrows under the order of the Emperor? Did David when he wrenched Goliath’s head back by his hair and bested him into humiliation? Did it compare to the covenant he formed with Jonathan?
He kisses your glittering scars in thanks and washes your blood away with his lips and tongue too. But unlike any other day in which you’ve done this, he stands up with a grunt and pulls you up with him. Father Mayhew falls backwards onto his bed and so you follow dutifully, and because the hold he has on your wrist is strong to the point of bruising. You lay your head over his heart and pant into his skin as he teases your plush thigh, tracing crosses into the chubby expanse of skin.
“No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us.” He cajoles, walking on that burning tightrope with you.
He wonders if your cunt would be just as chubby, if you’ve ever thought about humping the organ bench, riper than the forbidden fruit, and he mentally catalogs an extra long session of repentance. To be fresh and clean again. Father Charlie will go through his sermons with his lighthearted tone and charming personality, desperate to hide that he’s thinking of plunging his tongue in your asshole. Sipping and slurping up your musk like it’s the only holy water he needs to live. Or entice you into eating his ass, you would love being able to serve him properly, no doubt.
To nourish you with his fragments, his vertebrae and viscera. The body and the blood. The teeth and the testicles.
He’ll sit in quiet contemplation in front of the pulpit, pouring wine over your body in his mind. Following the red trail with his tongue as it trickles down the valley of your chest and dips in and out the folds of your belly. He’ll leisurely open his mouth on a silent moan at the top of your mound, the hairs like yellowing blades of glades against his philtrum, in a perfect paradise there’d be blood there too. His own personal, pervertedly literal, red sea.
You’d look so beautiful, swollen and fat with a child growing in your womb. A shame that can never happen, but a blessing that no heretic of a man could snatch you up and take you away from him. Your flock is here, and the heavy crook of his staff is all you need to guide you back home when you go astray. Trapped in his thighs, molded by his hands, punctured into line with his cock.
#kinktober#kinktober 2024#grotesquerie#father charlie mayhew#nicholas alexander chavez#nicholas chavez#nicholas alexander chavez x reader#nicholas chavez x reader#father charlie mayhew x reader#charlie mayhew#charlie mayhew x reader#nicholas alexander chavez smut#nicholas chavez smut#father charlie mayhew smut#grotesquerie x reader#grotesquerie smut#priest kink#⚰️.deaddove#dead dove do not eat#tw flogging#just in case#tw whipping#ryan murphy
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wait, what's the T? what's going on?
> emilia perez gets nominated for 13 oscars, despite being a terrible movie that portrays both mexico and the trans community on a very bad light
> critics, the trans community and LatAm all criticize it heavily for, again, being a terrible movie
> I'm Still Here is nominated for 3 oscars, and it is being universally praised worldwide for its story and its acting, especially Fernanda Torres (also nominated for best actress)
> LatAm is throwing support over I'm Still Here because it's a movie about Latin America, made by Latinos, starring Latinos; the general consensus is to support it over Emilia Perez, who is made by a Frenchman (who recently said Spanish is the language of "poor people"), starring a Spaniard in brownface, and who doesn't have any latinos in the cast; apparently there just weren't any latinos talented enough to star in it, according to the director? also Emilia Perez used AI for the songs, because the disney channel girl can't sing for shit, and she can't speak spanish
> Karla Sofia Gascon has incredibly thin skin, and she sees the support for Fernanda Torres as an attack on her. She (who doesn't follow Fernanda on Instagram at all) makes a video begging Fernanda to ask brazilians to stop "attacking" her and her movie
> Fernanda makes the video, even though she doesn't have to. Karla doesn't repost the video or acknowledge it in any way.
> a week later she gives an interview where she says that "people working with Fernanda's team" are enacting a smear campaign against her movie (untrue) (ALSO A BLATANT VIOLATION OF ACADEMY AWARDS RULES)
> brazilian twitter's ire awakens
> she makes a half-assed attempt at damage control
> too. fucking. late
> brazilian twitter has spent the better part of yesterday/today unearthing her past tweets. some TRULY heinous stuff. racist, xenophobic, backstabbing shit.
> she's been trying to delete them, but not fast enough. it's out there. and we are out for blood
Again i can't stress enough how bad this movie and how bad she fucked up doing this
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𝐜𝐫𝐚𝐬𝐡 𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠..𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐲 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭
◦ ♡
𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐛 𝐱 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 – non!mc/mc. caleb crashed into lake michigan! in chicago! in front of you! how are you supposed to handle an intergalactic space colonel with abs, manners, and absolutely no clue what walmart is? 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬 / 𝐭𝐰 – reverse isekai (caleb comes to earth),romance,fluff,comedy, angst, nsfw topics/language, tba 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 - 1 of — reblogs comments & likes are appreciated. lmk if u want to be tagged.
the humming of the farspace fleets deep tunnel grew louder inside his helmet. it was a low, almost soothing vibration that caleb had grown far too familiar with. another day, another shoddy mission.
“tunnel stability at 98 percent” his earpiece whispers a calm and steady hum in his ear.
calebs gloved fingers hovered above the holographic controls, eyes narrowed, every movement precise. the swirling lights of the tunnel outside the viewport pulsed in soft gradients of blue and violet like a spiraling galaxy.
red.
a sudden spike flash across the console.
“warning: tunnel destabilization detected. energy surge inbound.”
calebs brow’s furrow, darting around commands into the console ai. as he does the tunnel outside began to shudder, colors fracturing into unnatural streaks.
white lights crept into the edges of his visions like porcelain cracks. caleb’s breathing slowed, focused, “initiate emergency shu-”
a deafening pulse of energy surged through the cockpit, shaking the entire vessel. the white light consumed him. his system cracking into static.
his lips find their way to his apple necklace.
silence.
it was supposed to be a normal afternoon.
you’d brought your favorite lemonade, found your usual quiet spot by the lake, and pulled out your phone, ready to scroll through tiktok until your brain officially clocked out. the sun was warm, the breeze was gentle, this was nice. this was good.
peaceful. chill.
honestly? you were thriving.
that is.. till something weird happened.
at first, it was just a strange hum. low but barely noticeable. you glanced around. Nobody seemed to notice. not that there were many people around. you were in a more secluded area of the lake.
the water in front of you rippled. your eyes snap towards the water observing it, already standing up to run.
and then- he appeared.
he just… emerged. like ariel on that rock. or whatever. oh, oh, like moto moto!
one second: empty lake. The next: a sexy man standing waist deep in the water as if reality had just uploaded him directly into lake michigan.
you froze, blinking, your brain fully short circuiting.
the man was tall. broad. dressed in a military uniform that looked a bit too good on him, his eyes purple like amethyst.. soaked brown hair. his breathing was steady and controlled. he slowly lifted his head, scanning the area like a soldier assessing in a battlefield. and then his eyes landed on you.
you held your lemonade like it was a crucifix. the man tilted his head slightly, as if confused and curious.
you did the only logical thing any person would do when confronted by a strange man materializing out of thin fucking air in broad daylight.
you whispered, “what the fuck?!”
(commercial break)
he took a slow step toward the shore, water streaming down the armored plates of his suit. you couldn’t move. your feet felt like they fused with the ground.
you blink. this was not normal. this was odd and weird. you had eyeshot of the lake in front of you and you didn’t see a man walk within your peripherals in the past 15 minutes.
as you think, you fail to notice that he stood a few feet from you. his eyes scanned everything. the skyline. the parked cars. passing birds, you. his gaze was sharp and analytical, but you couldn’t help but catch the flicker of unease.
for a moment neither of you spoke. then his voice, calm and low, “this isn’t… skyhaven..”
you stared, “.... i don’t know what that is…”
he inhaled a deep sigh, his jaw clenching slightly. his eyes darted up to the sky, scanning. then around again. His hand reached up, unfastening something at his neck. he pulls off the jacket bearing unfamiliar insignia.
he followed by tugging off his cap, running a hand through his damp hair. without the uniform he almost looked like any other ridiculously good looking chicago tourist who happened to have just crawled out of the lake in his dress blues?
almost.
his eyes settled back on you. “you’re local,” he stated. not a question.
“y-yeah,” you said, still clutching your drink like a nervous squirrel, “uh. chicago.”
another pause. you watched as he took a small, subtle breath, adjusting his posture, as though trying to blend in. his military ‘tude slipped into something softer, calculated, but oddly polite.
“i need to speak with you. somewhere less exposed.”
you hesitated, your brain running full speed through every true crime documentary you’d ever watched. but there was something about him that didn’t scream danger. he seemed… lost. out of place.
and possibly extremely confused.
…..BUT MAYBE THIS IS WHAT HE WOULD WANT YOU TO THINK
"...you don’t have any weapons on you, do you?"
his brow twitched slightly, almost like a tiny flash of amusement. “no. not at the moment.”
"...okay." against every ounce of common sense, you sighed. “come on. my car’s over there.” oh, what would your parents think?
he followed without hesitation, keeping pace exactly one step behind you. polite, controlled, but clearly still assessing everything like this entire planet was a potential threat.
you unlocked your car, climbed into the driver’s seat, and tried very hard not to hyperventilate as he sat himself into the passenger side, closing the door.
a beat of silence filled the cabin.
you finally turned to him and blurted out, “okay. who — or what — are you?”
the silence hung for a long, awkward beat.
you stared at him, your brain still trying to process any of this, as your fingers gripped the steering wheel so hard your knuckles went pale. he sat there like this was a perfectly normal tuesday.
finally, he spoke.
“my name is caleb xia. colonel. farspace fleet .this is not my world.”
you blinked.your mouth opened slightly, but all that came out was a soft, strangled noise. “...what.”
“i was traveling through a deep tunnel corridor,” he continued, his voice low, calm, like he was giving a report. “there was a malfunction. anomalous coordinates. i lost control of the vessel’s trajectory and…” his eyes scanned the unfamiliar cityscape out your windshield again. “i arrived here.”
you stared at him.
and then you laughed..
“i’m sorry — what?” you sputtered. “you expect me to believe you're from... space? like, intergalactic, star wars? not, like, russia or something?”
his brow twitched ever so slightly at your comparison. “star wars..? no. no.”
“oh my god, you’re serious.” you clapped a hand over your mouth. “okay. so you’re from skyhaven? which isn’t on google maps, by the way. a colonel?”
“correct.”
you gave him your absolute most deadpan, wide-eyed stare. “are you having a psychotic break?”
if caleb was offended, he didn’t show it. In fact, you thought you saw something flicker across his expression — patience. like he’d expected this. like he’d already calculated your reaction before you even had it.
without a word, he reached into the inside pocket of his jacket.
you immediately stiffened. “hey, whoa—”
“i’m not armed,” he assured smoothly, pulling out a small, sleek object — no bigger than a deck of cards. the surface shimmered with a faint blue light, metallic but almost liquid in how it reflected. there were no buttons. no seams. the edges curved unnaturally smooth. it definitely didn’t look like anything sold at best buy.
he tapped it once, and the surface came alive . a floating projection emerged, rotating gently in midair like a miniature hologram. complex glyphs and symbols you couldn’t even begin to read spun around a glowing image of what looked like... a planet? a star system?
“this is a navigational core module,” he said quietly. “it tracks dimensional coordinates for deep tunnel travel.” his eyes lifted to meet yours. soft but firm. “your world isn’t on any of our charts.”
your jaw dropped open.
you looked at the hologram. then at him. then back at the floating image, which was still calmly rotating in front of your very real, very human face.
your brain screamed: THAT’S NOT AN IPAD.
“holy shit,” you whispered.
you kept staring at the floating projection like your brain was buffering. if this was a prank, it was a really good one. but nothing about him screamed prank. everything screamed calm, extremely dangerous man who accidentally landed in chicago from a freaking alternate universe, and #needthat.
your voice came out small. “...is that real?”
caleb calmly deactivated the device with a brush of his fingertips — it folded back into itself like liquid metal and slipped neatly into his jacket again.
“i anticipated you’d require additional verification.”
he pulled something else out of his suit. a sleek, block. his phone.
he tapped the screen. the interface lit up in a design you couldn’t even recognize — elegant, minimalistic, even though it was a normal looking phone.
he handed it to you.
you hesitated but took it carefully, half expecting it to electrocute you. the screen pulsed slightly as if reading your touch, but otherwise, it let you scroll. there were apps you didn’t recognize.
no google. no instagram. no facebook. no tiktok.
your eyebrows furrowed as you flicked through what appeared to be his photo library.
and that’s when you saw it.
a picture of him standing beside a girl — smiling, standing on what looked like a floating platform overlooking a glowing futuristic skyline. the city was breathtaking: glittering towers spiraled into the clouds, neon highways coiled between buildings, flying vehicles zipping silently through the air.
you blinked at the girl beside him. she was pretty, soft-featured, and looked very familiar.
“...is this your girlfriend?” you asked, feeling a weird stab in your chest for absolutely no reason.
caleb glanced at the photo. his expression softened for the first time. “its… complicated.” “oh.” you blinked again, glancing down at the skyline. “is this skyhaven?”
he nodded. your jaw dropped as you scrolled through more photos — linkon’s towering buildings, vast technological hubs, alien landscapes, even images of creatures you didn’t recognize , all shimmering under unfamiliar constellations.
“this looks like a star wars movie,” you whispered. “only it’s… real.”
star …wars? “it is,” caleb said softly, watching you with quiet amusement as your eyes grew wide with every swipe. “everything you know here would be considered… primitive. in comparison.”
you gave him a scandalized look. “wow. thanks. way to make a girl feel special.”
for the briefest second, you thought you saw something that almost resembled a small smirk twitch at the corner of his lips.
.
you sat there for a few seconds, staring at his face — at the phone still in your hands, at his perfectly calm expression, at the absurdity of what your life had just become in the span of fifteen minutes.
“okay….” you finally breathed. “you… you’re real. you’re actually real.”
“i told you i was.” His tone was matter-of-fact.
you stared at him again. “you literally just glitched into my lake.” he blinked. “yes.”
you groaned softly, pinching the bridge of your nose. “okay. you can’t just… sit in my car forever. we can’t sit here. i guess….you can come back to my place while we figure this out.”
he didn’t even hesitate. “hmm.. acceptable.”
you started the car and pulled onto the road, mentally drafting a list of increasingly bad decisions you were making today. bringing a strange man to your apartment? who may or may not be from another dimension? yeah. real smart.
it wasn’t until you pulled into your parking spot and glanced at him again that your brain hit another very important wall.
oh no.
you had no men's clothing.
you stared at his still-damp suit. he looked like a psyop..!! there was no way you could let him just walk around like that. it screamed cia experiment or cosplay gone way too far.
“okay so…” you said, teeth gritted. “tinyyy problem. you can’t wear that.”
caleb looked down at himself, mildly analyzing the gear. “why not?”
“you’re gonna draw attention. and by attention, i mean you’ll be trending on twitter within thirty minutes. we need to get you into something… normal.”
he nodded, calmly accepting the foreign terms. “then where do we acquire appropriate attire?”
you sighed. “ walmart.”
his brow quirked slightly. “....is that a supplier?” …..well… “sure.” you waved your hand mumbling under your breath, “let’s go with that….”
you drove in silence for a while. stealing glances at caleb sitting perfectly composed in your passenger seat. like being abducted by a complete stranger was totally normal.
meanwhile, your brain was NOT composed. ‘alternate dimension.. far…space…fleet? colonel? another universe? and i have to deal with this at a WALMART?’
“...you sure you’re okay?” you finally ask. “i’m fine.” he answers calmly, his hands resting neatly on his lap, posture completely upright as if he was on a mission.
“functioning.. gotcha..” you pulled into the walmart parking lot and immediately regretted every life choice you had made up to this point. it was packed. absolutely packed. cars were crammed into every possible corner. people with their carts wandering around to their cars. horns honking. yelling.
if that wasn’t the cherry on top, a man on the corner twirling his sale sign is now fighting a.. pigeon? caleb observed it all with the same calm expression he’d worn since appearing in your life. “this is… an important area?” he asked, and you didn’t know whether to be embarrassed or annoyed at how cramped walmart always seemed to be. “apparently.” you mumbled.
the sign man swats at the pigeon, and spins a perfect 360 while the pigeon flaps at him, and you’re confused. caleb tilts his head slightly, genuinely curious, “is this like a… ritual?” you shake your head at him and for what felt like eternity, you finally spot a parking space.
you weave the endless crowds and cars like a pro.
caleb stayed close behind you, silent and hyper-alert. his eyes constantly scanning his surroundings. you could feel stares at him as you weave through people. stares that state, “holy shit he’s tall..” and “oh i’d like to climb him like a jungle gym.”
the automatic doors whoosh open and..
boom (no not like-)
the walmart hit him all at once.
bright fluorescent lights. loud overhead announcements. giant colorful banners screaming ‘SALE!!’ endless rows of overstocked shelves. the smell of popcorn and something you’d rather not know.
caleb subtly stiffened. his pupils contracted slightly as he looked around, processing the overwhelmingness that is walmart. “this is…” he starts in a low voice, unsure how to proceed. “welcome to america.” you whisper to him.
as you continue deeper towards the store you huff,
“okay, let’s just get you some clothes before you accidentally get drafted into the army or something..” you said quickly, tugging him gently toward the men’s section. as you steer him through the aisle full of cargo shorts and graphic tees, caleb’s brow furrow at the embarrassing phrases on them.
“is this… what you guys wear..?” he asks, eyeing the rack of t-shirts that read: “ beer bacon and FREEDOM!! ” you exhale through your nose, “i really hope not.”
as you pull a few t-shirts off the rack, sticking to compliment him instead of making him stick out even more. as you do, you couldn’t hold your curiosity.
“okay can i ask something?” caleb, standing behind you, turns his head slightly, “what is it?”
“your name… caleb.. that’s like… just your name?” you gestured vaguely, “you’re from like… super earth, and your name is caleb?”
a small smile touches the corner of his lips, barely. “is there something wrong with my name?”
you flushed at his question, “no! i just thought it’d be… i don’t know– something more futuristic…?” as you say that you’re reminded that star wars has a protagonist named luke skywalker. things suddenly seem less befuddled.
he watched you for a moment longer, amusement behind his eyes, “we have normal names. not everything about my world is different.” you huff, “sure.. except for the part where you’re from another dimension.”
you couldn’t help it. your brain was still whirring. hologram. his iphone 90 or something. the photos. but people did craz things with ai these days. maybe you’re getting scammed right now. or maybe.. you swallowed… he was in a cult…
your mind spiraled: oh my god what if he’s part of a cult and i’m being fucking recruited right now. hot guys from the ‘future’? i’m getting cult-fished… fuck
“okay.. okay.” you blurt before you could stop yourself, “are you in a cult?” calebs eyes shoot towards you, caught off guard, “a.. cult?” he repeats you, and you nod, “like.. weird secret group.. brain wash…you know?”
his lips press together briefly before he shakes his head softly, “no.” his voice was steady, quiet, and firm. “i am not part of a cult. i’m a colonel of a fleet.”
there was something in his tone that made your stomach tighten. something fiercely protective under all that calm. you stare at him, trying to poke holes, “ok but all the photos and stuff.. it could be ai..you can barely tell these days!” you half whisper half shout. caleb holds your gaze, steady and unflinching, “that’s true..” he wasn’t offended, “you have no reason to trust me..”
his honestly actually threw you off more than if he had tried to defend himself.
you pull your phone out, quickly typing his full name into google. caleb watches as you quietly scroll through pages of… nothing. no profiles. mentions. linkedin. instagram. facebooks. no news articles.
you glanced up at him, your heartbeat picking up, “you don’t exist…” – “i do.” he replies softly, “just not here.”
you open your mouth but no words come out. his voice drops, more gentler now, as if he could sense your overwhelm. “i know it’s impossible. i know how hard this is right now.” he murmurs, eyes locking into yours, “but i’m here. and i am real.” you stare at him, throat dry,
“god…” you mumble.
.
thankfully after a couple minutes of scanning racks and checking random aisles out, caleb gravitated toward something that actually worked. a dark jacket, fitted white tshirt underneath, dark jeans, and sneakers. honestly? he was giving model vibes.
you blinked, half impressed, half still spiraling, “how did.. you pick this out so fast..?”
caleb glanced down at himself, adjusting the jacket slightly, as if evaluating the fit. “something i’d wear back home..” he glanced around briefly before looking back at you, a small grin appearing on his face, “...blending in increases safety.”
you gave him a flat look. “you just analyzed a walmart fit like a military op.”
he offered you one of those tiny composed smiles again, “i’ve got a couple years under my belt.”
after that you take him to a couple of rows away, “we’re gonna get you pajamas.” caleb’s eyes dart at said pajamas, “i sleep shirtless.” he says calmly and you freeze. you snap out of it and sigh as you mentally prepare to be in walmart for another 30 minutes.
you made it a mission to fill the basket: grey sweatpants, PLAIN tshirts, socks, underwear (you did NOT make eye contact during that aisle) and a basic hoodie.
‘hes gonna look so fuckin’ fine’
you’re not saying that out loud though. you have some self preservation instincts!
then it hits you.
he has no place to go. no hotel. no wallet. no earth money. hes not even in the solar system.
you freeze with a loofah in your hand, staring at him in sudden horror, “oh. my god.” you whisper, “you have to stay with me.” why aren’t your survival skills working?
he looks at you and nods, “yeah.” – “that wasn’t a question!” – “i assumed as much” he drops the toothbrushes into the cart, “you’re a stable option.” he informs, “oh great-” you mutter, “-i’m a stable option.”
“would you rather i sleep outside?” caleb steps closer, “no.” you mumble, suddenly overwhelmed by the thought of him shirtless on your tiny couch, “god no.. just..” your lips twitch, “can you stop being so calm about this? you crash landed in lake michigan.”
“- and now i’m getting socks. it’s called adapting.” you process his reply and you just roll your eyes, throwing the loofah into the cart.
.
the drive home is quiet. your brain is still playing catch up, trying to process the fact that there is a possibly extra dimensional man sitting in your passenger seat, calmly holding a walmart bag filled with irish spring and old spice.
when you pull into your garage, the overhead flickers a hum, casting a warm glow over the empty space. as you let out a sigh, you reach for the door handle,
“stop. i’ll get it.” caleb says. your eyes flicker at him and before you can argue, he’s already out, moving around the front of the car. you blink as he opens your door for you, then effortlessly grabs every single bag from the back like it’s nothing.
“seriously-” you say, shutting your odor, “you’re gonna pull your arm out of socket! let me carry something.” caleb looks at you, unfazed, “you’ve already done enough. i can handle this.”
that shouldn’t make you feel something.. but it does…
maybe it’s the calm confidence in his tone, or the way the bags crinkle against his hoodie as he turns to the house.. like this was a normal outing– a chore. maybe because he didn’t say it in a smug way a guy might do.
either way, you catch yourself staring. blushing. oh god.
you look away quickly and fish your keys out of your purse, “okay well.. thank you! come in..” you whisper in reverence.
he waits patiently behind you as you unlock the side door and lead him into the kitchen. the bags crinkle softly as he sets them on the counter. your tiny kitchen suddenly feels smaller. warmer. like his presence is filling every inch of the space.
you clear your throat, “i uh..i’ll show you the guest room. it’s a glorified storage room right now but-” “it’s fine.” he says smoothly, eyes scanning the room like he’s still mentally mapping it for exits. “you’ve extended more hospitality than most would.”
you swallow, “yeah well.. I’m not most..”
his gaze lands on you then, unwavering, “i know.”
you immediately look away again and give him a quiet little house tour.
the living room first. cozy, and a bit small, but its warm with soft throw blankets, fresh flowers on the table, and somewhere you’d like to be at during christmas time. caleb’s eyes linger on that a moment longer than necessary.
then a hallway, “this is the bathroom,” you say, pointing, “and then this is the… guest room, but that’s a generous title.”
you nudge the door open, revealing a space that looks like it belongs in a pinterest board. theres a twin bed with an oversized blanket, a small dresser, some spare boxes stacked in the corner, and your extra vacuum leaning against the wall like an elephant in the room.
“it’s tidy.” caleb says simply as he steps in. he runs his hand gently across the edge of the dresser, “you keep things clean.” your eyes flicker up to his face. he doesn’t say it in a judging way– more like appreciates it. or finds comfort in it..
“uh yeah..” you say softly, rubbing your arm, “i like it that way..i don’t do well with messes..”
“i can tell,” he chuckles dryly, “it feels safe in here.” you freeze for half a second. safe. why did that make your stomach do a full somersault?
“anyway-” you clear your throat and gently shove the walmart bag at him, “here’s your stuff. feel free to shower first. i’ll put the rest away..” he nods quietly and composed, then walks toward the bathroom like he already memorized the floor plan.
a few minutes later, you’re folding his new hoodie and tshirt over the dresser when you hear the faint clunk of the bathroom door swinging open. you turn around instinctively– and you freeze.
he’s in a hot towel– sorry- hes in a normal towel. hes hot. right.
a singular, low slung towel wrapped around his hips, droplets of water still slinging into his collarbone, trailing down his chest. you don’t even know how someone can look that sculpted and casual at the same time. your jaw drops so fast it almost dislocates. caleb blinks, toothbrush in hand, a hand towel in the other, his hair slightly wet and pushed back, “you said to grab my clothes, didn’t you?”
you forget how to speak. your brain just starts shouting words like shoulders, abs, did i vacuum under the bed? boom shakalaka yes godddd.
“i-uh — yeah.” you finally stammer, holding out his folded clothes like a peace offering, “yes– here– clothes. wear these.” he walks over, very calmly, unfazed, and takes the clothes from you. his fingers graze yours. your soul leaves your body.
“thank you,” he says, low and warm, then turns to go back into the bathroom. you don’t move for a full minute and just stare at the closed door as you marinate in your thoughts. ‘hes gorgeous. but hes a stranger. hes a man…. a tall, strong, man. he hasn’t hurt you..YET..OR–OR maybe hes a good man!’ you feel delusion settling in as you anticipate your turn in the shower.
.
you shoulder after him, shutting the door a little too quickly behind you, still mentally reeling from the towel moment. no thoughts, just abs and a freshly shaven happy trail. you try to focus. your favorite shampoo. face wash. don’t slip and die in the tub because an interdimensional colonel made eye contact with your entire nervous system now.
when you emerge, fresh faced and dressed in your coziest FLATTERING pajama set, the scene of clean cotton and a little anxiety clinging to you, you find caleb already sitting at the tiny kitchen table. He’s wearing the black hoodie you got him, sleeves pushed up to his forearms, and he’s quietly examining a salt shaker like some artifact. you’re a little breathless from how normal he makes it look.
“dinner is gonna be easy today..” you say, moving past him and into the kitchen, “pasta and garlic bread with um…brownies for dessert.” he tilts his head, “brownies? what kind?” your eyes slightly light up, “hm.. just normal ones.. any requests?” you say, kinda but not really surprised that he knew about brownies.
you make quick work of the food. boiling, cooking the protein, heating the sauce, and trying not to burn the garlic bread. caleb watches, like it’s a science experiment. you offer him the job of grating the cheese to distract him, and he takes it seriously.
dinner is eaten quietly, but not uncomfortably so. you’re sipping water when you finally muster the courage to say, “i was gonna watch something after to wind down. you can join if you want.”
“i’d like to.” he says, wiping his hands neatly.
you both end up in the couch— him sitting at the very end, and you curl up at the other corner. you pick something light. funny. Something you’ve been half watching in the background lately. “it’s called never have i ever.” you mumble, “teen drama. really girl/woman centered.” caleb gives you a nod, “okay.”
the first five minutes are unbearable. you’re overthinking everything. is caleb bored? is he judging the terrible voiceover by john mcenroe? greatest tennis player ever? oh god, theres a make out scene, already?
but then he chuckles. very faintly, and you blink at him, “did you just …laugh?” caleb shrugs casually, “i like devi. she’s intense.” you stare at him for a minute before you start to laugh as well, “alright- that’s fair.”
by episode two, the space between you two has closed slightly. you aren’t too sure when it happened. maybe when you passed him a brownie. maybe when you both made the same noise at the love triangle.
.
it’s nearing midnight when you finally glance at the clock and groan. you stretch where you sat and mumble, rubbing your eyes, “i have to sleep.. I have to check in at the boutique tomorrow..” a part of you feels disappointed, but the other half feels giddy.
caleb nods from the other end, then his eyes make their way towards you, “alright.” you stand and start collecting dishes and brownie crumbs, trying not to think too hard about how normal this feels. like his presence didn’t turn your life inside out in the last ten hours. “I’ll be gone for maybe a couple hours..” you say, stacking plates in the sink. “you could…um.. reorient yourself? chill. stay inside. maybe … don’t get arrested?”
he raises a brow, “why would i get arrested?”
you gesture vaguely, “i.. don’t know..” which earns you the tiniest smirk from him, “i’ll.. keep a low profile.” you nod, mostly to yourself, as you back down the hallway toward your bedroom.
you pause at your door, hand on the knob, very suddenly aware that this is your last line of defense between you and the very calm, very lethal, possibly single man in your living room. you squint at him suspiciously, “i swear if you kill me in my sleep..”
his eyes meet yours without hesitation.
“make it quick..” you finish, deadpan, “i’ve seen too many true crime stories..”
caleb blinks slowly, amused, “i’ll keep that in mind..”
you couldn’t help but smile a little
“goodnight space colonel.”
“goodnight.” he mumbles your name softly.
next chapter
𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 ! - @miffysoo, @rcvcgers, @udejoenrlddo, @calebsmorena, @carmendanny2, @alayaaaahhhhhh, @asilaydead, @ellexamor, @inzayneforaj, @unstablemiss, @romils, @animegamerfox, @floatinginaer, @sleepisfortheweakpooh, @girlwith-kalei-do-scope-eyes, @nm4565natty, @mentaltrouble2201, @solarlovesxyz, @awwhks, @cinnamonpinktea, @taenosaurrr, @twistedtastefulme, @blessdunrest
#lads x reader#love and deepspace#lads caleb#lads#lads mc#loveanddeepspace#caleb x reader#lnds caleb#lnds#caleb lads#love and deepspace caleb#caleb x non!mc reader#mc x caleb#non mc x caleb#non!mc x caleb#xia yizhou#caleb angst#caleb x y/n#caleb xia#caleb x you#caleb fanfic
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Judex, Judicum, Infantem - Chapter 1
(Eventual) Reader x Matt Murdock x Frank Castle
next chapter | series masterlist | my masterlist
gif by me
summary: Two pink lines stared back at you and began to blur in your vision as tears welled in your eyes. Shit. You think back on one of the possible encounters with Frank that could have resulted in this.
warnings: SMUT/18+ (don’t interact if your age is not in your bio) AFAB Reader. No use of Y/N. Mention of pregnancy. Unprotected P in V, Oral mention, aftercare. Pet names. Angst.
wc: 2,144
*I never give permission for my fics, manips, or any other original creation I post on Tumblr to be copied, posted elsewhere, translated, or fed into any AI program. The only platforms I currently post on are Tumblr and AO3. Thanks!*
The tile of the bathroom floor was cool against the back of your thighs as you sat there waiting. A welcome relief to how intensely it felt like your body was producing nervous sweat.
17 more seconds.
You squeezed your eyes shut and inhaled deeply, trying to calm your nerves. Your leg bounced up and down as you waited, feeling like the seconds dragging on were taking an eternity.
It was only a few days late. Okay maybe like a week. Or two. You’d lost count. But it was so unlikely.
You were just stressed, that’s all. There had to be an explanation.
Your birth control was 99% effective according to the doctor. And you had absolutely taken it every day. Right? Right. Maybe.
There couldn’t be any way.
You jolted at the sound of the timer on your phone and scrambled to silence it while also lunging for the little plastic stick balancing on the corner of the sink.
You held it with both hands in front of you.
Two pink lines stared back at you and began to blur in your vision as tears welled in your eyes.
Shit.
· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·
A few weeks earlier
The moan started in the back of your throat and died just as it escaped your lips, muffled by the scratchy fabric beneath you where your cheek was pressed into. The flesh of your rear was hiked in the air and reverberated with a slapping sound each time Frank thrust into you harshly over and over. His grasp was firm, each hand anchored to where your waist met your hips. Mindlessly pulling you back into his body in a counter to his rhythmic movements.
“Just one more sweetheart” he cooed “Just need to feel one more from you.”
Your knees ached and your hip joints were starting to lock up, but you didn’t even dream of tapping out, too lost in the bliss of Frank pulling so many orgasms out of you tonight, you’d lost count. How long you’d thought of having him in a moment like this. Felt the tension between the two of you rise and rise until the coil finally snapped. Now the two of you were like animals, freshly freed from their cages and ready to pounce on each other until you collapsed in exhaustion under the dingy florescent lights of the small office in the abandoned warehouse where he was currently squatting.
His accommodations weren't particularly comfortable — the cinder block office of an abandoned electric company facility wasn't what one would call homey. Nor was the utilitarian and practical way he had it arranged, with floor to ceiling shelves of canned food and ammunition. You also wanted to make some snappy comment about the mattress on the floor with no bed frame, covered in worn bedding matching the singular lumpy pillow your face was now buried into as he fucked you mercilessly. Would this man ever allow himself a single damn comfort? A fuzzy blanket or even a throw pillow or a mug that didn’t look like it was dug up from a time capsule from 1982?
A firm slap on your ass had you whimpering as you clutched at the sheets beneath you.
“Quit bein’ difficult baby.” he commanded
Baby.
Fuck, you shuddered at the mere sound of that word in his raspy, fucked out voice. It seemed almost unbelievable to you that you’d ever hear him call you that in this manner.
You weren’t trying to be difficult. It was just that you knew as soon as this was over, as soon as the two of you would lay there together in the afterglow, that things would change between the two of you and a conversation would need to happen. One you so desperately didn’t want because you knew where it would lead. You knew Frank would never allow himself the warm and fuzzy hallmark ending. So you held off on your orgasms as long as possible. Which wasn't easy to manage considering how psychically he was reading every ministration of your body.
Adjusting his position, his large paw of a hand came to rest on the back of your neck. Not with the pressure of a full on choke, but enough firmness to steer you as he please like the rudder of a boat. You felt the thump on the mattress as his foot anchored beside your aching leg. His new stance placed him on one knee, increasing his leverage and depth. He fucked into you as if he wasn’t just chasing your pleasure; it was as if he was trying to expel the demons of how he felt about you. Seeking with each punch of his tip against your cervix to rid himself of the guilt of whatever spark he allowed between the two of you to grow and grow until it turned into this.
The hand on your neck pulled your head upward so his other hand could reach around to press two of his thick digits between your lips, along your tongue, and down your throat.
That did it.
You groaned on his fingers as your cunt clenched around his cock. His feral roar rumbled from behind you a moment later as he spilled himself inside your still trembling walls. Just as the last of your heat’s spasms died down, you felt the comfort of his fingers leave your mouth and a trail of drool dribbled down your chin. With feather light precision, he replaced his controlling grip on your neck with his chapped lips and the bristle of his 5 o’clock shadow. He continued kissing down your spine. You let his journey guide you, lowering your body vertebrae by vertebrae until you were flat on your stomach, finally letting your muscles relax with a groan.
“Atta girl, baby.” he whispered, followed by one final kiss to the base of your lumbar.
There was that damn word again. Baby. Almost as if he…
I love you
The words wisped through your train of thought like a siren’s distant call.
Shut up, brain.
A satisfied hum escaped him as he flopped on the bed beside you. Cocky grin growing on his face, he rolled on his side and traced soft circles into the heated and sticky flesh of your arm.
“You good?” he inquired
You replied with a content mumble, watching as his soft eyes drank you in beside him.
“So good, Frankie.”
“So fuckin’ beautiful” he murmured, almost as if he didn’t even realize he was verbalizing the thought out loud.
Your heart froze up at his words. He thought you were beautiful.
I love you.
The three words you so desperately wanted to say danced on the tip of your tongue in the spaces of silence between inhales and exhales, threatening to spill out of your lips and inevitably lead to what you dreaded.
The conversation.
Frank sensed the shift, clearing his throat as he rolled onto his back and all the way into a sitting position.
“Stay put. I’ll get you cleaned up.”
You tried not to let him hear the sigh that pushed from your lungs as you rolled onto your back, a physical release of the words you knew you felt but didn’t dare say.
He returned a moment later, clad in black sweat pants that hung low on his hips, and carried a damp grey washcloth.
“Ew, do I wanna know where that’s been?” you asked as he tapped at your knee, indicating for you to open your legs
“Can you not have a fuckin’ mouth on you for once? Tryin' to take care of you.”
You shrugged and parted your legs so he could clean you up.
“If you were a little less eager earlier, you could have known exactly what my fucking mouth is good for.”
“Christ.” he mumble with a sigh and a shake of his head, meeting your eyes with a smirk on his face
You couldn’t help but grin in return, noticing the flush rising in his neck and knowing it was you that got him all flustered. It was your favorite thing to do to Frank.
Well, after tonight, your second favorite thing.
You scrunched your nose with a giggle as he ducked back down, ever the focused Marine on the mission before him.
The washcloth hit the concrete floor with a splat as he finished and tossed it aside.
No sooner had you relaxed into the comfort of the bedding beneath you, still hazy and coming down from your bliss, a soft fabric something landed on your face. The projectile carefully aimed in playful retaliation for your previous comment. You swiped it away and sat as he climbed back onto the mattress beside you.
The faded olive sweatshirt he tossed at you was clearly old; the worn Marine’s emblem on the left breast and the holes along the sleeve banding indicative of it’s history of threadbareness. Still, it smelled like Frank, all comfortable and warm and familiar. As you slipped it over your head, you realized it felt like him too.
Just as you’d gotten the garment situated just right on your body, you felt the gentle pull of his arm around you. Drawing you against his chest, he pressed a kiss into your hair. His embrace, much like his sweatshirt, was warm and comfortable.
It was still. Silent and content in the air surrounding the two of you and what had just transpired. Maybe you could be at peace with how things had just changed between the two of you.
And then at your eye level came his hand, fiddling with the gold ring he wore on a chain around his neck.
A reminder of why you couldn’t bring yourself to say the three words that had been echoing in your conscience all evening. Why if you dared speak them, you’d never hear him say them back. Even if it was what he truly felt. It would only break your heart more than he was about to.
The calmness you’d just been feeling whooshed out of you like a hot air balloon popping and deflating.
Neither of you spoke yet, but the clicking of his tongue let you know he was trying to find his words.
“Sweetheart… I…” he stumbled
“I know. I shouldn’t have…” you trailed off
“No, hey. It’s just—”
You cut him off.
“Your dead wife.”
“Jesus Christ.”
“Sorry.”
“It ain’t just that. Look,” he paused, still finding the line between expressing his feelings and not crushing you completely “the life I live, it ain’t... I mean I just can’t have someone waiting with the porch light on for me. You know?”
“Oh for fuck’s sake Frank, when have you ever known me to be the type—”
“I know, I know. But, baby,”
Stop fucking calling me that.
“You’re just too damn good.”
“Oh don’t give me the ‘you’re too good for me’ spiel Frank. You’re better than that.”
“It ain’t a lie though.”
He sat upright, undoing the arm that was around you to fully face you.
The soft way he caressed your thigh and the earnest look in his eyes was almost enough to make you forgive him for whatever he was about to say.
“I had my shot you know? Had it all and I blew it. Can’t tell you how many times she begged me not to go back, but I thought I had time. Thought they’d always be there. I had to keep goin' back and back and then they got taken. Finally decided I wasn’t goin’ back and didn’t even get a day with them then they were just gone.”
You had to look away from his piercing brown eyes, or the tears would start flowing and you just couldn’t bare to let him see you cry. Not now. You’d never heard Frank speak so candidly about what happened to his family, always skirting around the topic as if he was trying not to fall into the mouth of a volcano.
“And now,” he continued “I’m just this now. I don’t know if I can go back to bein’…”
Normal. Happy. In love with someone who isn't her.
He licked at his lips as his words began to falter again, thoughts coming out choppy and all over the place.
“… and you deserve, you deserve someone who can give you that, you know?”
“I don’t want that.” you replied, finally finding some courage to meet his gaze again
“Bullshit.”
“You don’t get to decide for me what you think I should or shouldn’t want, Frank! God, you always think you’re right and it pisses me off.”
“Hey. Shhh.” he cooed, trying to pull you back into his arms again
But, you resisted.
“I should go.”
“No, no. Hey.”
His firm hand reached up, cradling your chin and turning your face to his.
“Stay? Just for tonight?”
Those goddamn brown eyes.
“Okay.” you contested
Maybe you could keep pretending this was real until the morning.
next chapter
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🍎 Blind date with your ex-husband. You never expected it to be… Caleb.
Inspiration hit me going 100mph down the highway, and I took an unscheduled gas station stop just to write this down. My husband almost divorced me again thinking I’d lost my mind — so in a way, this series is dedicated to him. And to second chances. I know they exist. I’ve lived one. 🥀
An unplanned new series. Five ex-husbands. Same setup, different reactions.
❄️ Zayne | 🎨 Rafayel | ✨Xavier | 🏍 Sylus
Cut Scene (NSFW): 🍎 Caleb – The Tea, the Rice, and Everything Between
CW/TW: emotional trauma, post-divorce grief, unresolved intimacy, mutual guilt and blame, AI-simulated memory confrontation, violent emotional release, destructive conflict, references to emotional manipulation and psychological burnout, gameified use of weapons, simulated car crash, coarse language, heavy emotional dialogue, themes of self-sabotage, intimacy tangled with pain, and lingering affection that hurts to hold. Please read with care.
Pairing: Caleb x ex-wife!you Genre: Emotional combat dressed as therapy. Post-divorce catharsis through orchestrated destruction. Rage as ritual, memory as minefield. Estranged soulmates, bruised devotion, unsaid things turned weapon. Slow-burn devastation with soft hands and steel teeth. Summary: You didn’t sign up for closure. You signed up to break things. But when your blind date turns out to be Caleb — your ex-husband, your gravity, your sharpest regret — the rooms stop being symbolic. Each one strips you down, forces you closer, until rage gives way to honesty, control to collapse. And underneath it all, he’s still the man who would never let you fall… but might be the reason you broke in the first place. Word Count: 7.1K AN: For some reason, the one I write last always ends up being twice as long as the one I write first — which is why I constantly rotate the order. Out of five men, five parts, this one came last… and, predictably, got out of hand. I'll be honest — this turned out painful. At least for me. And cruel, in places. But it felt honest. Maybe a little OOC at times, but let’s be real — divorce changes people. And now I need to recover from this one. Probably for longer than I want to admit.
Almost a year after the divorce, something inside you had been fermenting.
Not relief, not the lightness of a woman unshackled, but something bitter and unholy. The kind of pain that doesn’t dissolve, but calcifies. It grew claws. Grew teeth. Turned your bloodstream into gasoline. You tried everything: the silence of mountains, the thrill of anonymous sex, the rhythm of violence in a boxing ring. None of it was enough. The hunts were no longer satisfying. The catharsis, too fleeting. You needed something that could bleed when you hit it.
So when the ad appeared — BLIND DATE: DESTRUCTION EDITION. To escape, you must destroy — you signed up without thinking twice. Rage has never been your enemy. Indecision is.
You dressed for war. Tight leather pants that clung like a second skin. Laced boots with soles heavy enough to leave imprints. A button-down shirt under a corset not meant to seduce, but to shield. Your hair pulled into a high, severe ponytail. Drama layered like armor.
This wasn’t a date. It was a reckoning.
You arrived five minutes early. You always do. The place was a former warehouse, rebranded into a rage room with curated destruction experiences — urban apocalypse meets sad girl therapy. The hostess gave you a waiver and a smirk. “He’s already here,” she said. “In Room B.”
You didn’t ask questions. You didn’t want to know. You wanted to feel your heartbeat in your teeth.
You walked in, pulling on the thick gloves, then sliding the protective goggles into place. The world dimmed slightly through the tinted lenses, sharpening at the edges. Everything suddenly looked a little more dangerous. A little more true.
The door hissed shut behind you, and the lock clicked with a finality that was almost erotic. One way in. No way out but through — through brick, through rage, through whatever poor bastard was foolish enough to stand in your way.
Your hand found the sledgehammer without looking, fingers curling around its weight like it was made for you. Heavy. Grounding. Righteous. You gave it a test swing, then another, calibrating impact, imagining bone. You didn’t even glance at him.
Whoever he was, he’d get the same treatment as the wall.
Until he spoke.
“Well,” the voice cut through the air like a cracked knuckle, dry and dark, “you still choose the biggest weapon in the room. Some things never change, pip-squeak.”
You turned. Fast. The hammer arced through the space between you, too close. He ducked. The wall behind him caught the edge, chipped hard enough to spray red dust into the air.
“Say that again,” you warned, low and flat, “and I swear I’ll aim for the nose next time.”
He straightened slowly, expression unreadable except for the barely-contained fire in his eyes.
“Touchy,” he muttered. “All righty. Retiring that one. Let’s see... viperette? Still small. Still mean. But I respect the venom upgrade.”
Caleb.
Of course it was Caleb.
The universe had a sense of humor. A cruel one.
He looked like war in a t-shirt. Leaner, somehow, like rage had eaten away the softness around his edges. His jaw was tight, eyes dark and alert, like he’d been living off caffeine and unfinished sentences. He held a crowbar like it was an extension of his spine — ready to break, to pry, to rip something apart.
You didn’t say his name. You didn’t give the moment that kind of power.
“Jesus,” he muttered, eyeing the setup. “A brick wall. Real subtle. What, are we supposed to talk about our feelings while we chip away at the trauma?”
You didn’t dignify that with a reply—at least not right away. Then, dryly: “I think we’re supposed to break shit. Bonus points if we don’t murder each other.”
He barked a short, mirthless laugh. “Blind date with a bat and unresolved issues. Sounds like your kind of night.”
“You’re projecting. I didn’t come here to reminisce, Caleb. I came here to destroy.”
“Great. Start with the wall.”
You planted your feet, drew back, and slammed the hammer into the bricks. The jolt surged through you like an exorcism. Caleb followed suit, striking beside your dent with a calculated precision that annoyed you more than it should’ve.
You worked without speaking. The cracks formed slowly, reluctantly, like even the damn wall didn’t believe you two could work together. You hated how easily your rhythms aligned. Always had. Even when you fought, you were fluent in each other’s movement.
He paused, wiped his forehead with the back of his hand. “So. Tell me, did you know it was gonna be me?”
“If I had, I’d have brought a bigger hammer.”
“And here I thought you might’ve missed me.”
You turned your head, just enough to let him see your smile — sharp, unapologetic. “I did. Like you miss a bullet you didn’t dodge.”
That shut him up.
For now.
The wall finally began to give.
Cracks widened, deepened, split like veins across the surface. Your breath came hard, sharp in your throat. You were sweating, but the hammer felt lighter now, almost like it wanted more.
Another hit. Another. Then —
Caleb dropped his crowbar with a clatter, stepped in close, too close. You tightened your grip, not sure if he was about to yell, shove, or kiss you.
He didn’t do any of those things.
Instead, he reached out and gripped your upper arm — not rough, but firm, like a man redirecting fate — and pulled you a half step back. The wall loomed beside you like a dying animal. You opened your mouth to protest, but stopped when you saw his face.
He was looking at you like he was memorizing the end of the world. That same gaze he used to have when he thought you were asleep and he was letting himself be weak for ten seconds. It cut deeper now.
You didn’t blink. Neither did he.
Then, without a word, he turned, drew back, and drove the full weight of his body into one final strike.
The hammer met the weak spot with a sound that rang like a gunshot. Dust exploded into the air. He kicked the base of the wall hard — his boot landing with perfect force, perfect timing — and the whole thing collapsed in the opposite direction, away from you, bricks falling like dominos, like judgment, like the years between you had meant nothing and everything at once.
Silence.
Then you exhaled.
And said, flatly, “You always did know how to make a point. Real subtle, Colonel.”
His jaw twitched. That was all. No quip this time, no grin. Just the tight strain in his neck and a flicker behind his eyes like something was about to unhinge. But it didn’t. Of course it didn’t. That was the whole game with you two — feeling everything and showing nothing until the room caught fire.
You stepped through the rubble.
The next chamber was colder. Darker. The hum of old OLED screens filled the air like flies buzzing near a carcass. Dozens of them, mounted along the curved walls in perfect symmetry. Some flickering, some bright, all showing the same kind of sickening reel. Success. Smiles. Promotions. Affection posed for the camera, curated happiness. Couples at sunset, at brunch, in bed. Running on a beach, golden and effortless.
Then the altar.
A bride. A groom. A goddamn soft-focus lens.
You stopped cold.
The hammer slipped from your hand. You bent slowly, picked up a chunk of broken brick from the ruins behind you — rough, warm, red with the breath of your anger — and flung it.
The screen shattered on impact. A flicker. Sparks. A frozen image of a kiss, fractured into spider veins of glass.
Caleb didn’t move. Not really. Just stood there, staring at the wall of curated lies. His eyes darted from screen to screen, like he was trying to catch something in the movement. Like he was afraid he’d see something too real.
You hurled another brick.
The screen cracked with a dull, satisfying sound, collapsing inward like it had flinched.
“Would’ve been more poetic if they used our photos,” he said, dryly, like his throat was sand.
You scoffed. “Should’ve offered the organizers access to our digital album, I guess. Too bad I wiped every trace of you from the cloud last October.”
That got him.
His lip curled upward — half a smirk, half a snarl. “Of course you did. Practical. Cold. Classic you.”
You turned slowly, blood surging behind your ears. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
He didn’t step back. Caleb never did. “I didn’t delete anything,” he said, voice low. “Renamed the album. Filed it under ‘Bitch I Used to Love’ Thought it was honest.”
You could’ve scratched the skin off his face with how fast your hands moved if not for the gloves and the goggles between you. You were on him in a second, eyes locked, breath ragged, but neither of you made contact. Not yet. The air between you hissed with the threat of combustion.
“You’re such a fu—”
The voice cut in. Not his. Not yours.
From the screen behind you, a woman's face smiled, unbearably bright, like a toothpaste ad with delusions of sincerity. “You can always count on me,” she said.
Your breath stopped.
That phrase. His phrase.
Before you could move, Caleb did.
He crossed the room in two strides and brought the bat down like wrath. The screen split open with a flash of white light and a guttural sound that wasn’t quite human. A scream, maybe. Or something deeper.
He didn’t say anything after that. And neither did you.
Not in words.
But your body answered. Loudly.
You tore through the room like it had insulted you personally. Which, in a way, it had. Those grinning avatars of happiness, the sterile intimacy of picture-perfect couples — people who hadn’t known the feeling of being swallowed alive by someone they trusted. Smug joy laminated in pixels. They deserved everything you gave them.
You brought the bat down on one screen, then another. Glass shattered in bursts. Sparks flew like ash from a controlled burn. Across the room, Caleb mirrored you, attacking from the opposite side — controlled, brutal, rhythmic. Again, you were in sync. Not lovers. Not enemies. Just two wild animals with matching scars, dismantling a cathedral of lies.
And then you met in the middle.
The largest screen loomed between you, mounted above a faux-marble pedestal like some grotesque altar. You swung. Hard. The bat ricocheted off the screen like it had hit bone.
It didn’t crack. It laughed. A sharp recoil shot up your arm.
You let out a guttural sound — somewhere between a curse and a grow l— and dropped the bat.
Then picked up a brick.
It was still warm from the earlier wall, one edge sharp enough to draw blood if it wanted to. You didn’t give it the chance. You took it to the screen, again and again, raw and breathless, something primal and unrepentant bleeding out through your hands. Each strike carved into the polished surface like you were trying to murder memory itself.
Caleb didn’t stop you. He just stood to the side, watching the destruction like it was sacred.
When the screen finally gave in, it did so all at once. Glass caved with a scream of surrender, wires snapped, the frame buckled and collapsed in on itself. Behind it: a door. Dark, narrow, humming softly.
You stood still, shoulders heaving. Your fingers clenched tighter around the brick, so tight the rough edges pressed through the gloves and left grooves in your skin beneath. You swallowed hard, once, choking back something feral and ho t— not quite tears, but close enough to shame you.
Then, without looking, you turned and hurled the brick in the opposite direction. Just to hear it hit. Just to remind yourself you still could.
Caleb took a step toward you. Careful. Something in his face had changed — softened, almost. His mouth twitched like he was about to ask the one question no one in their right mind should ask.
Are you okay?
No. You were not okay. You were on fire inside a collapsing structure and the only thing holding you together was inertia.
“Touch me,” you warned, voice like cut wire, “and I swear I’ll hit harder than I did that screen.”
And with that, you walked forward. Toward whatever hell came next.
The room ahead was cleaner. Cold lighting. Metallic walls with thin veins of circuitry pulsing like capillaries beneath glass. At the center stood a sleek black pedestal, and on it: two shotguns. Game-style, not military, but still heavy, still real enough in your hands to feel the familiar pull of power in the barrel. Your palms flexed on instinct.
You grabbed one without hesitation. Caleb followed suit.
Above, a voice crackled — genderless, modulated. Artificial.
“Welcome to Trigger Point. Please attach neural sensors to your temples. Each player must input ten phrases associated with emotional distress. The AI will cross-reference the data, generate projected constructs, and render them in combat form. Destroy on sight. Objective: release. Completion time: variable.”
You stared at the interactive screen blinking in front of you. A small keyboard. Ten empty fields. The implication clear: name your demons. Feed them in. And then shoot them down.
Caleb started typing immediately. No hesitation. His fingers flew. He was always better at anger. At naming what hurt. You wondered if he’d been waiting for a moment like this.
You stared at your own screen, unmoving. The cursor blinked at you. Accusatory. You hated this part. Not the shooting. The naming.
Because naming made it real.
But you typed.
Reluctantly, clumsily, then faster.
Because you knew exactly which phrases had lived rent-free in your spine for too long.
Done.
You caught him glancing sideways. His screen dimmed just as yours did, locking your inputs.
You didn’t want to know what he’d written. But the room did.
A low mechanical hum vibrated through the air, and the wall across from you came alive. Light surged and split into fragmented holograms — each word sharp as a knife, floating midair, stuttering into full clarity. One at a time.
“Cognitive synchronization complete. Each phrase will be visualized using memory-sourced projection. Targets derived from active recall. Accuracy required. Proceed.”
You felt the data pull like a hook behind your eyes — memory sucked forward, scanned, sorted, shaped.
The first phrase came like a punch to the teeth.
You were the safest place I knew. Until you put a ring on me and turned the lights off.
It hovered for a second, just long enough to register, and then dissolved. The smoke twisted and thickened. From it emerged a figure that stole your breath.
It was you.
Not the way you feel in mirrors, not the version eroded by grief or fury. This one was too poised, too precise. Her face was colder than you remembered yours ever being. Her beauty surgical. Her anger had been refined into stillness, and in that stillness — something worse than screaming.
She looked at Caleb like he’d failed a test she never let him study for.
You hesitated.
Your fingers twitched around the shotgun’s grip. You lifted it slightly, almost reflexively — but something inside you screamed don’t. You didn’t remember saying it like that. Not with that finality. Maybe in anger, maybe meaning something else entirely. But this version of you didn’t look like she regretted a thing.
She raised her own weapon.
You flinched.
But Caleb fired first.
The shot was sharp, efficient. Her body shattered into a scatter of static and fractured light.
You turned to him, stunned. His fingers were still trembling on the trigger. Yours were, too.
Not just by the sound of the shot, or the way your projected self shattered — but by the fact that he had pulled the trigger.
On you.
Even if it wasn’t you-you. Even if it was just light and memory, coded and cruel. He had done it. Without hesitation.
It felt final somehow. Like something sacred had cracked open and spilled out. Like you’d crossed a threshold you didn’t know existed.
Because you used to believe — no, know — that even at your ugliest, your worst, your most furious, he would never hurt you. Not like that. You had believed, with a terrifying kind of faith, that he’d sooner put a bullet through his own head than raise a weapon to yours.
And maybe that was still true. But maybe it wasn’t.
Maybe too much had decayed between you. Maybe the divorce had rewritten you both in ways neither of you were ready to see.
You didn’t want to ask. You didn’t want to know the answer.
Neither of you spoke. You could see in his face that the phrase had lived in him longer than you’d ever meant it to. Long enough to calcify. Long enough to echo. Long enough to ruin.
You froze, body coiled in silent expectation.
You knew what was coming. You could feel it before the text even appeared, like a static current pulling through your chest. The phrase you typed. The one you swore you wouldn’t look at when it came.
But it came anyway.
The words unfolded in slow motion, thick with memory, with everything unsaid between you. A sentence shaped like him.
I was too blinded by loving you. You only let me touch you when you wanted something. You pull my heart like a puppet on strings.
It didn’t feel like watching something. It felt like being flayed.
Your breath caught.
You fired — too soon. You missed. Glass behind the projection cracked, but the thing itself remained.
You hadn’t wanted to see it. You hadn’t wanted to hear it again. You regretted typing it. You regretted remembering it. You regretted ever giving those words a place to live inside you.
You could feel Caleb tense beside you. Not from the content — he already knew the line — but from the timing. From your reaction. From how fast you'd tried to erase it.
You gritted your teeth. Lifted the gun again. A bead of sweat rolled down your temple, cool and traitorous.
You aimed. And fired.
The figure burst apart — no scream, no sound — just a silent, violent fireworks display of red-gold pixels. Gone.
You stood there, breathing hard, hand tight on the grip, pulse roaring in your throat.
And only then did you understand.
Why he’d shot your projection first. Why it hadn’t felt like betrayal, not really.
Because these versions of you — of him — these pale ghosts, weaponized by memory and algorithm, weren’t real anymore. They were remnants. Monsters made of moments that no longer had the right to exist. Not even here, in a world built of nothing but ones and zeroes.
You hadn’t destroyed him. You’d destroyed the version of him that hurt you.
And maybe, just maybe, that’s what he’d done too.
More phrases came. Some his. Some yours.
Why do you always disappear?
Shot. Flash. A twist in the gut. You don’t stop moving.
I felt safer when you weren’t there.
Shot. Flash. His shoulders jerk. You catch it, pretend you didn’t.
You made me into someone I hated.
Shot. Flash. You almost drop the gun. Almost.
You wanted control more than connection.
Shot. Flash. You taste metal in your mouth. Don’t know if it’s from the memory or your own tongue.
It all becomes a blur — fragments of truth, shredded light, the weight of your weapon like a heartbeat in your hand.
Then —
One more.
It doesn’t come fast. It lands.
Like a final breath drawn sharp before the plunge.
His.
I loved you so much it destroyed me.
No shape yet. Just the words, hanging. Clean. Unfiltered. Unhidden.
Like he never got the chance to say them out loud. Like some part of him still hadn’t stopped saying them, even now.
Everything in the room goes still. Even the flicker of light quiets. And you feel it — that if you move now, everything will break.
You don’t know when the tears started. They weren’t dramatic. They didn’t sting. They just existed — like breath, like gravity. Sliding down your cheeks with the same quiet inevitability as everything else that’s ever gone wrong.
You were back there. In that moment. Before the signature. Before the sound of the pen on paper. When he looked at you across the room, and said it — not to win you back, not to argue, not to accuse. Just to say it.
Because it was true.
And now here he was again — only not really. A pixelated Caleb. A slowed, AI-crafted echo of that same version. Stepping forward from the projection field like it remembered how he moved.
The voice that left his mouth was mechanical, but still it hit like flesh: “I loved you so much it destroyed me.”
Exactly the way he had said it then. The rhythm, the weight. The slight lift at the end that had felt like a question, a prayer, a hope too stupid to say out loud.
This ghost carried it too. You didn’t raise your gun. You couldn’t.
You couldn’t shoot that. Not the hope. Not the part that believed.
And so —
Caleb did.
No hesitation.
A clean, brutal shot that tore the projection apart mid-step. The ghost shattered like it had never mattered. Never happened. Never existed.
And then there was silence. When you turned to him, his face gave you nothing.
A mask. Still. Cold. The kind of stillness that doesn’t come from control, but from emptiness. Like your love hadn’t just hurt him.
It had hollowed him.
And maybe he was right. Maybe there really was nothing left.
“Nothing left to break,” he said quietly. “Nothing left to ruin.”
You looked at him. Eyes wide. Wet. Fragile in a way that made your skin crawl.
“Do you think I wanted this?” you asked, voice raw, like something torn.
He stared at the air where the projection had been, then turned his head slightly — just enough to catch your gaze. But his face didn’t change. He was somewhere else.
“No one wanted this,” he said. “And now we’re literally shooting pieces of ourselves. Burning through our own memories. Like wanderers. Like something foreign. Something we don’t belong to anymore.”
He looked around the room — at the shards of your past, still flickering. Smoke curling around dying light. A graveyard of ghosts you built together.
“It’s ugly,” he added. “But it’s beautiful, too. In its ruin.”
For the first time since the experiment began, you genuinely wanted to leave. Not rage-walk. Not storm out. Just… go.
Slip out the side door of your own psyche and vanish into air that didn’t taste like grief.
But there was no exit. Only forward.
Caleb moved ahead without a word. His body, usually so precise, so full of intention, now moved with the flatness of routine, of resignation. Like he, too, would rather be anywhere else — any room, any war zone, any alternate timeline — as long as it was far from this one. Far from you.
Still, you followed.
Your jaw clenched. Your breath caught sharp behind your teeth. You could feel the exhaustion sliding down your spine, thick and slow, but you didn’t let it stop you. You were going to finish this room. This experiment. This punishment. Whatever it was.
You were going to finish it with your head up. Even if, by the end, the only thing left to break was you.
And him.
Because he wasn’t stopping either.
And if the only thing you could do now was survive each other — then so be it.
The next room was vast. Empty in that curated kind of way that made chaos feel designed.
A sprawl of objects covered the floor — furniture, glass, cheap electronics, ceramic towers, crushed memories disguised as junk. It looked random, but you knew better. Nothing in this place was random.
And then there were the cars. Or what passed for cars.
Two stripped-down, reinforced vehicles — half desert racer, half post-apocalyptic scrap tank. No doors. No bodies. Just exposed frames padded with thick rubber guards. For safety. For impact.
In each one, a helmet.
You reached for the driver’s seat, fingers brushing the wheel, ignoring the helmet like it was a suggestion, not a rule — until Caleb’s voice cut in, low and sharp.
“Don’t even think about it.”
You froze. Spun on him.
“Oh, you’re giving orders now? That’s rich.”
You held the helmet by the chin strap, weighing it like you might throw it at his head.
“What about you?” you snapped. “Think I didn’t notice you weren’t planning to wear yours either?”
He didn’t answer. Just walked up to you and, with a startling lack of hesitation, jammed the helmet down onto your head. It caught on your ears. You cursed. He tightened the strap under your chin like he’d done it a hundred times. Maybe he had.
“I’ll wear mine,” he said, finally. “I know what this is. I know I’m your target.”
“That’s not the point of the exercise,” you muttered, flushed — not just from rage, but from the unbearable closeness of his fingers near your pulse.
You hated how your body still reacted. How it didn’t get the memo.
“Then let’s go,” he said, gesturing toward a tall ceramic vase as if that made anything simpler. “Hit something that won’t hit back.”
You threw yourself behind the wheel.
The engine roared awake — guttural, loud, too loud. It made your bones vibrate. Made your blood move. You wanted to scream. Instead, you pressed the gas.
At first, you aimed where you were supposed to — toward the objects. Toward the walls of cheap plaster, mannequins dressed in tattered remnants of other lives, cardboard boxes that exploded with satisfying finality under your tires. Something crunched. Something hissed. The world responded to your force. You smirked.
It felt good. But not enough.
Not with him still grinning across the room like this was just another simulation. Another exercise. Another moment where he got to stay composed while you unraveled.
And so —
You jerked the wheel. Toward him.
You slammed your foot down and the car jolted forward, rattling like a live thing. You didn’t know what you were doing. Only that you wanted impact. Needed it.
Caleb veered sharply to the right. You followed. He hit a cluster of mannequins, their limbs flying like blown petals. You turned tighter, skidding across a field of splintered boxes, your tires spitting cardboard shrapnel.
"Thought you said this wasn’t about targeting me!" he shouted over the roar of the engines.
"It’s not," you yelled back, swerving hard to chase him. "It’s about physics. You just happen to be in the way!"
He laughed. Loud. Honest. Then, dodging left, "God, you were a menace on a tricycle."
"And you were a sanctimonious little hall monitor!"
"You stole my lunch for a month!"
"You deserved it. You put raisins in everything."
“You loved raisin muffins.”
“Muffins, Caleb. Not pasta. Not rice.”
Another near-miss. You clipped the back of his car with a glorious metallic screech. He swerved, recovered, accelerated. You pushed harder.
You were hunting him now. You wanted to see him sweat. Not because you hated him, but because you couldn’t stand how much you still didn’t.
“Who gave the toddler a license?” he barked.
“Probably the same genius who made you a colonel!”
And then you caught him.
Your front bumper slammed into the side of his car with a satisfying, ugly crunch. Both vehicles jolted. Metal howled. You felt your own body snap forward, then whip back.
Then — his car spun, but yours skidded too far. You tried to correct, but it was too late.
You hit the wall.
Plywood gave way with a groan, but not enough. Your car embedded half its frame into the splintering surface, the engine sputtering, then smoking — thick, chemical breath rising like something had finally given up.
You didn’t scream. You didn’t panic. You just… stopped.
The world narrowed.
Then he was there.
You didn’t see him jump out. Didn’t see him run. But suddenly he was there, ripping open the harness, yanking the helmet off your head with shaking hands.
“Are you out of your fucking mind?” he snapped, eyes scanning you, touching your shoulders, your arms, your ribs like memory. “Are you hurt? Are you —? Look at me. Pips! Look at me.”
You looked. And then — smirked.
A small, crooked thing, like the aftermath of chaos.
Then you laughed.
At first, it was just breath. A puff of absurdity. But it built. And it broke.
You laughed harder. The kind of laughter that comes too close to tears, that spills out sideways and jagged. Your whole body shook. You couldn't stop. Couldn't breathe.
And then — he did too.
His forehead pressed against yours. His chest stuttered with laughter. It wasn’t funny. It was never funny. And that’s what made it so goddamn necessary.
You clung to each other like gravity had forgotten how to work.
Your fists balled in the front of his shirt. His arms circled around your back, then up, then closed like steel around your head. He pulled you to his chest and held you there, hard, tight, like the world could crack open any second and he wasn’t going to risk letting go.
Your laughter broke first.
It caved.
And then came the sob.
One. Then another.
Your shoulders buckled. Your breath hitched. And then you were sobbing against him — ugly, heaving, violent tears that had waited far too long. Everything you hadn’t said, hadn’t allowed, hadn’t felt came pouring out in great gasping waves.
He held you like it was all he knew how to do.
He didn’t speak. He didn’t need to.
“Why does it hurt so much, Caleb?” you whispered through the sobs, your nails digging into his back. “Why did every day with you start feeling like a survival quest?”
His lips brushed your temple, featherlight. His fingers moved through your hair — slow, grounding, almost clinical in their tenderness. A rhythm. A scan. Every few strokes, the pressure shifted just slightly, as if mapping out where you carried the worst of it.
And still, you couldn’t ignore the truth: you knew exactly what he was capable of. With those same hands, he could crack your skull like a walnut. Break you clean in two.
But he didn’t. And that restraint ached just as much as anything else.
“I don’t have an answer,” he murmured. “I only know one thing. That being without you hurt worse. But the idea that you were suffering with me... That I — my own fear, my own fucking hands — destroyed the most sacred thing I ever touched...”
You shook your head and pressed your hand to his mouth. You didn’t want to hear the end of that sentence. You wouldn’t survive it.
“We both did it,” you said. “You don’t get to take all the blame. It’s always two people. Always. Equal weight.”
He kissed your fingers. Gently. And you pulled your hand back like it had caught fire.
The flicker in his eyes was instant.
Pain. And something else — like memory, or the echo of wanting.
“There was a time,” he said, “when we were the closest people in the world. Cliché or not, we were a single thing. Now look at us. Look at you. I’m not even sure you want me this close.”
“No,” you snapped, gripping his shoulders. “No, don’t say that. I’m terrified of how much I need you close. I’m scared of what I might do if you keep looking at me like that. If you touch me again. I’ve been fighting since the moment we walked into this place. Fighting not to —”
“Not to what?” he growled, closer now, voice frayed.
“Not to try again,” you breathed. “Not to want again.”
His hands locked around your waist. His face was right there. Breath on breath. Your bodies a magnet of wrong time, wrong place, right everything.
But he didn’t kiss you.
He held you at the edge, suspended, with something like agony in his eyes.
“Saying that out loud,” he said through clenched teeth, “is reckless. It’s dangerous.”
“Meaning it is worse,” you said, barely audible.
You could feel his heart against your ribs — fast, raw, so human it hurt to listen. And then he said, lower now:
“Are you really this cruel? You want the last working piece of me to break, don’t you?”
“No,” you whispered, stepping back, breath shivering. “No, Caleb. If I could, I’d give everything — everything — just to take your pain away. But how can I, when I’m still living in rubble? When I don’t know how to plan for tomorrow, or next week. When I can’t even picture where I’m going. I just keep moving. Blind.”
He looked at you for a long time.
And in that look — something bottomless. Not pity. Not anger. Something like recognition. You felt it in your ribs, your spine, your breath. Like he’d looked through your skin and seen the exact same void you saw in him.
He stepped back gently. Then rose to his feet.
Wordlessly, he extended a hand to help you up. You took it. Let him lift you.
He glanced around the room, then toward the wreckage, the wall, the place where your car had finally given up.
A low huff of a laugh escaped him.
“Of course,” he muttered. “The exit’s right where you crashed.”
You followed his gaze.
He was right.
Just one thing left to break.
The wall gave way with almost no resistance. It split open like it had been waiting for the final blow. You stepped through, side by side, not speaking. And suddenly, the world shifted.
No floor. No weight. No direction. You were in a massive, sterile cylinder, suspended in air — except there was no air current, no movement, no sensation of falling. Just drift. Your feet detached from the surface, and that was it. You were floating. Weightless. Unanchored.
The space felt unreal. Too smooth. Too quiet. A hum beneath the silence, like some great system breathing in sleep. High above, three exit hatches blinked with dull blue light — two narrow, one wide. The single exits were clearly labeled. The larger one read: DUO. Beneath it, a platform hovered, inert. A voice filtered in through the chamber, calm and cold.
“Three exits. One for each individual. One for those who remain. Shared exit requires cooperative locomotion and continuous dual contact. Time limit: irrelevant. Success requires choice.”
You drifted. He drifted. You turned your head and saw him across the space, his body slow-spinning, expression tight. This was supposed to be his realm. Gravity. That was his Evol, his identity, his anchor. But here, it was nothing. Disabled. Cut off. You could see the glitch in him, the way he processed the loss of control. And still, he didn’t panic. He just… adjusted.
You floated near one of the solo exits. It would be so easy. A small push. An end. A beginning. Alone. And then it passed behind you.
You saw him again, a little closer this time. You reached out, almost without thinking, and caught his hand. No rush. No symbolism. Just fingers brushing fingers in a place without weight.
Your hands gripped. Held. And you pulled yourself in, gently, until your faces were close enough for words. Your breath felt warm between you, even in the cold of engineered air.
“I’m not ready to leave here without you,” you said. “I don’t know what that means, or what it’ll cost. But I’m not ready.”
He didn’t speak immediately. His hand tightened on yours. Then, suddenly focused, he said, “Wrap your legs around my waist.”
You blinked. “What —”
“Trust me. I can’t bend the field in here, but I can feel the currents — like micro-resistance. If we stay connected, I think I can guide us through it.” His voice shifted into command mode — confident, steady, and irritatingly hot. “Angle your hips left. No, a little more. Perfect. Now shift your weight forward.”
You moved with him. It felt awkward at first, like trying to learn to breathe underwater. But then something clicked — your center of gravity merged, found alignment, caught onto an invisible pulse. Like tuning into a frequency only his body knew how to hear.
“There,” he said. “We’re in it.”
You glided, slowly at first, then more directly. He adjusted, compensated, kept you level. He took you through the space like a conductor feeling the music in muscle and bone.
The platform under the shared exit blinked to life as you approached.
“Now,” he said, and reached out. Together, you hit the button.
Gravity returned in a single, devastating second. You dropped like a stone — feet on solid ground, air in your lungs, heat in your skin. You didn’t let go of each other. Not right away.
Not yet.
What came next stunned you.
Where pain and rage had once lived like permanent tenants, there was only silence. You no longer felt the urge to scream, to break something, to tear through walls or claw through your own skin. Something had been rewritten in you. Recoded. As if the metaphysical cancer had been excised. Removed without anesthesia, yes — but removed all the same.
You took one step. Then another. And your body felt different. Not like it did in zero-gravity, not quite. But something remained of that lightness. That sense of floating just above your own sorrow.
You didn’t speak. Neither did he. Words would have broken the seal on something sacred.
You emerged into the final hallway together. Unspoken choreography. At the return counter, you shed the gear — gloves, goggles, names. One of the staff blinked, visibly surprised, and said, almost to himself, “No one’s ever mastered the gravity room that fast.” Then louder, “Would you like photos?”
You looked at the screen, flipping quickly past the chaos, the fracture, the violence. You stopped on the frame where the two of you floated — just suspended, hands clasped, nowhere to go but together. You tapped it. Took the printout without a word.
Caleb printed something for himself, too. You didn’t see what.
You walked outside. It was already dark, the wind sharp against your cheeks. The kind of cold that wakes you up, reminds you that you’re still alive.
Without meaning to, your bodies shifted toward familiar geography — toward your place. Once his, too.
And then, like nothing had changed and everything had, he slipped off his jacket and draped it over your shoulders. No words. No offer. Just instinct.
You didn’t argue. The fabric was warm. And it smelled like him. Like worn-in leather and something sharp underneath. You let it settle.
“What do you regret most?” you asked, quietly, almost to yourself. Maybe you shouldn’t have. But you knew, with sudden clarity, that whatever came now — wouldn’t hurt.
Maybe it would be sad. But it wouldn’t be cruel.
“That I gave up too soon,” he said, after a moment.
You laughed softly. “Too soon? You followed me for three months. After work. To the grocery store. You left flowers in my bike basket. Random books on my doorstep.”
He gave a crooked shrug, not quite defensive. “It sounds stupid now. Hollow. But I didn’t know what else to do. How else to tell you I was trying. That I was willing to change. That I just needed you to hear me.”
“To me it felt like a trap,” you said. “Like you were setting bait. Like you wanted to pin me down and hold me there. In the state I was in... if you’d just disappeared for a week, I probably would’ve come running. In tears. Begging you not to leave again.”
He sighed. “So I got it wrong. Again.”
“Not wrong, exactly.” You looked at him, then ahead. The street was quiet. Your block already in sight. “That’s the problem, I think. For both of us. We keep thinking we know better. Like I assume I know what you need, when really, it’s just what I need.”
You glanced at him. “Like you dreaming your whole life of this expensive model starship. Then giving it to me. Thinking it would make me happy. Because it would make you happy.”
His smile came slow, bittersweet. “And all you ever wanted was someone to just sit on the porch and look at the moon.”
You nodded. “Exactly.”
By then, you were already at the gate. Home.
You stopped. Both of you.
You didn’t reach for your keys. He didn’t move forward. Just standing there, jacket on your shoulders, silence resting comfortably between your bodies.
“Caleb…” you said softly, already knowing you didn’t need to finish.
He sighed. The kind of sigh that had learned to carry meaning. “I don’t have an answer,” he said. “I want to try again. And I don’t. I dream about holding you every night, and then I wake up. And it’s… cruel.”
“I have the same thoughts,” you admitted. “But I can’t just erase you. Not now. Not ever. And I’ll never be the one to suggest we stay friends.”
He smiled gently, brushing a strand of hair behind your ear. “Technically, you just did.”
“I said I’d never say it,” you shot back, lifting your chin. “Not that I said it.”
There was a beat, then you added, “What if we let chance decide?”
“A coin toss?” he raised an eyebrow.
“No. The photos. The ones we printed. If they match — if they’re even close — I’ll invite you in. For tea.”
He tilted his head, amused. “Tea. Very non-committal of you.”
“If they don’t match,” you continued, “then maybe… it’s not the time. Maybe we see each other again. Maybe we don’t.”
“You always did like risk,” he said dryly. “Alright. No promises.”
“No promises,” you echoed.
“On three?”
You both pulled out your photos at the same time. Held them up.
The silence stretched.
“Well then,” you said.
“Yeah,” he murmured, the edge of a smile in his voice.
“I have only one question,” you said, turning toward the door, your voice lighter now, teasing. “Black or green?”
He gave a soft huff and curled his arm gently around your waist, guiding you toward the entrance. “Like you don’t already know.”
“I do,” you said, slipping the photo back into your bag.
The exact same photo. Identical in angle, in light, in pause. The moment where you floated together. Still not touching. But already not letting go.
The... END?
So… you survived the end. But is it really the end?
Let’s be honest — I wrote a scene. A very explicit one. The kind I haven’t posted before. Spicy, slow, and entirely too much in the best/worst way. But after everything that happened in this story, slapping it on the end felt… wrong. Like putting a silk ribbon on a smoking crater. So I cut it.
But. If this hits 100 reblogs in 24h, I’ll post the continuation I cut — the scene that didn’t fit the concept, because it was too much: too raw, too intimate, too honest. But also... very, very smutty. And maybe the only kind of peace these two could’ve found. You know what I’m talking about. You’ve earned it. Let’s see if they do.
#love and deepspace#lads#xavier love and deepspace#zayne love and deepspace#rafayel love and deepspace#sylus love and deepspace#caleb love and deepspace#sylus lads#lads caleb#lads zayne#lads rafayel#lads xavier#xavier x reader#zayne x reader#rafayel x reader#sylus x reader#caleb x reader#caleb x mc#zayne x mc#rafayel x mc#sylus and mc#caleb x you#xavier x you#zayne x you#rafayel x you#sylus x you#storytelling#fanfic#fanfiction
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There's been a HUGE surge in AI fics recently and so....
i would like to put you all onto this ai detector
the amount of ai junk that has started to infiltrate this fandom recently is so fucking insulting to people who are actually spending time writing.
i conducted an investigation the other day, the following photos are from a blog in this fandom that is churning out ai fics (i have blocked out the text so i'm not outright doxing them, but keep in mind these are only a few of the fics that i pasted into the detector, the majority of them were all 100% AI):
this is from my own fic, because i wanted to ensure that the site worked correctly, i pasted several pieces of my own fic into the detector and they all came back at 0%, so my own fics worked as the control in this experiment:
the point of this post is not to be an asshole, but to plead with you all not to read AI generated fics, don't paste people's fics into AI to "finish" them for you, don't use AI chat bots to talk to your favorite characters. art is supposed to come from the soul, it's supposed to be shared and appreciated, AI is literally killing art, and as a writer, this shit pisses me off so unbelievably that it makes me want to stop writing for this fandom, and i know i'm not alone in that sentiment.
if you're a reader in this fandom who wants to support REAL WRITERS, please feel free to use that detector if you suspect a fic is AI. a good telltale sign that a "writer" is posting AI fics is if they're posting at an inhumane rate-- no one can write 10 fics in a day... i'm telling you that with confidence as someone who has been writing for over 15 years.
if you're using AI to write fics for you-- the least you can do is be honest about it. I would urge you to stop, for the sake of the community, for the sake of artists who are constantly getting their work scraped to better these bots, for YOURSELF-- but i know most of you will not listen to me. so please, at the very least, place a disclaimer on your fics if they are AI generated, because you're not tricking real writers.
we can tell the fucking difference.
EDIT: i’ve had a few people reach out to me, concerned that their fics were coming up with some percentage of “ai written” on that ai detector. so here’s a disclaimer and then i will not be answering any more anonymous asks about it: NOT ALL FICS THAT SHOW UP AS “AI WRITTEN” ON AN AI DETECTOR ARE ACTUALLY WRITTEN BY AI! editing software that uses AI models such as grammarly can increase those percentages, as well as a ton of other factors. i need y’all to use critical thinking skills— the ai detector i posted a link to should be a last resort if you suspect an “author” is posting ai fics. look for the signs: posting several completed fics in a day/week, lack of internal conflict or dialogue within the writing, overly action-oriented writing, an abundance of short, abrupt sentences, zero reflection or discussion from the “author” on their own fics, if the “author’s” writing skills are drastically different when comparing their fics to other posts they make, no grammatical errors despite an abnormally fast posting schedule, an abundance of “request anon asks”. i did not post this to preach using ai detectors on everything you read or come across, only as a last resort and even then it might not be accurate. i do know for sure that the fics i plugged into that detector are AI generated, because I know how to spot them, and those specific fic “writers” literally post 10 times a fucking day. i just wanted to shed light on this issue, because it disgusts me, and i know a lot of folks here are unaware this is happening at such an unprecedented rate.
#fanfiction#fanfic#ao3 fanfic#pedro pascal#joel miller fanfiction#ao3#tlou fanfiction#FUCK AI#joel miller x reader
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