#also I just checked my queue and apparently it only runs at 3 posts a day

[shamelesslymkp]

I posted 4,848 times in 2022

1,253 posts created (26%)

3,595 posts reblogged (74%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@beatrice-otter

@lupinerage

@magnesiumflare

@ltleflrt

@tanoraqui

I tagged 1,551 of my posts in 2022

#i eat fic for breakfast - 774 posts

#fic recs - 774 posts

#schrödinger's content warnings - 774 posts

#via:pinboard - 773 posts

#queue me up scotty - 773 posts

#just talk to your therapist mkp - 69 posts

#nona the ninth spoilers - 49 posts

#fandom ate my soul (fanart edition) - 20 posts

#ho shit how do you talent - 20 posts

#current events - 14 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#i suppose it's nice that other people are feeling validated by this post but literally it is one of the most upsetting and infuriating takes

I sent 1 gift in 2022

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

wake up babe new pain scale just dropped

Discernible

Distracting

Distressing

Disabling

(Wish I Were) Dead

16 notes - Posted February 13, 2022

#4

he is wearing BOOT SOLES as PAULDRONS, this KID

(@kedreeva, mkp's znation liveblog, take 2)

19 notes - Posted May 17, 2022

#3

Was trawling back through my AO3 history and I started deleting deleted fics, which reduced the page count by like, 20 before I’d even gotten a 200 pages back from the oldest entries, so this is your reminder to check out and regularly use @nianeyna‘s ao3 downloader!!

(all gods bless you for sharing that, for serious, especially the pinboard functionality as apparently I AM a fandom dinosaur which is hilarious and somewhat inspirational at the same time)

(I am having some difficulties now finding and downloading the stuff I missed because it isn’t bookmarked on Pinboard from the AO3, only from LJ or whatever, which is why I started trawling my history in the first place and huh it looks like for the first few years I only left kudos when my head had been practically blown off, unlike my current categorizing system of ‘seen - tried, didn’t like’, ‘kudosed - read, liked’, ‘pinned to pinboard - read, liked enough to re-read’, ‘bookmarked on ao3 - read and holy shit i need a quick link to this fucker so i can read it again immediately on demand, and/or oh hey! series!’)

(I’m trying to make use of some other Python utilities I found for scraping my personal AO3 reading history but uh. I keep running into problems. u_u)

24 notes - Posted March 16, 2022

#2

D&D as Disability Metaphor

N.B. Most of the ideas herein about spell slots/cantrips and mana/health points were sourced from various tumblr posts; please reblog with links if you have them! Also reblog with additional links to those tumblr posts about forks and knives!

In this metaphor, YOU are a D&D/RPG character!

Your CHARACTER BUILD reflects your strengths and weaknesses. 

First: you have your basic STATS – INT, CON, WIS, DEX, STR, CHA – these are primarily determined by your baseline nature and your early nurture. (e.g., you may be born with a certain facility for learning, a natural sense of balance, perfect pitch, etc., or you may have spent much of your life playing sports and building strength and dexterity, or have been forced by circumstance to become Very Good at identifying people’s true motives and/or playing the part you need to play in any given situation, etc.)

Secondly: You have your basic ADVANTAGES and DISADVANTAGES. These are primarily determined by your baseline nature but can be affected by nurture and change over time just as you do! 

For example, you may be vision impaired – any task requiring good vision will have you at a natural disadvantage that can be mitigated by the use of an accessory or tool. So long as you have your accommodation, your natural disadvantage is entirely or partially nullified – instead of a negative 3 to skill checks involving vision, you might have a modifier of only negative 1 or even zero!

Another example: 

You might be autistic or have other sensory processing issues that mean certain textures are ILLEGAL – any time you’re required to interact with that texture, you have to roll a WIS save to see how it impacts you. 

On a bad day (in the metaphor, you roll a 1), you might be completely incapacitated for a time. On a good day, you might be able to use a positive modifier from a learned skill like DISTRESS TOLERANCE or DISENAGE to overcome the badness and only be partially incapacitated, or maybe not even incapacitated at all, just inflicted with a DEBUFF of some kind for a period of time. (This gives you a negative modifier for future skill checks and saving throws until the debuff expires or you take a LONG REST.)

On any given day, your disability (physical, mental, developmental, etc.) may give you a GENERAL DEBUFF that affects your skill checks and saving throws. 

For example, if you have bipolar disorder and are in a depressive episode, you might have a negative 1 modifier to any social interaction, even if ‘normally’ you have a plus 3. 

Or you might have chronic migraines and be having a debilitating headache that actually precludes the use of some skills/spells/actions at all – you might be incapable of leaving a dark room or of using your computer/phone.

Thirdly: In general, you can think of your overall capability to COPE as mana points, stamina points, spell slots, or anything similar. SPELL SLOTS is the easiest metaphor, just because of how the magic system is structured.

You have a given number of SPELL SLOTS on any single day, although a DEBUFF might reduce your baseline of slots for the day or a BUFF might actually give you an extra one! These spell slots correspond to the energy needed to perform various activities/tasks. The more difficult the task, the higher level of spell slot is required. BUT! If you’ve already used your third level spell slot for the day and need to “cast” another third level spell (another difficult activity), you can sacrifice multiple lower level spell slots in order to do so, with the disadvantage of having fewer slots left until your next LONG REST.

Some activities don’t drain you at all and can be done at any time (in this metaphor, they can be considered CANTRIPS). Some might even return used spell slots! (Think of this as taking a SHORT REST.) CANTRIPS are typically less effort or are of such benefit that they cancel out the level of effort required. They vary wildly based on the individual. An example for one person might be listening to an audiobook or taking a hot shower, while a different person might consider both of those first level spells.

Finally: The final part of this metaphor switches genres a little bit, so bear with me. This doesn’t tend to happen in the most well-known tabletop RPGs, but you’ve probably seen it in other popular media. Sometimes, you’re completely out of spell slots / mana / stamina, but you’ve got something you absolutely HAVE to do – either because it’s a necessity for your survival, or because you simply care about the thing so much that you’re willing to borrow against your future self.

In this kind of situation, you can ‘borrow’ spell slots from your future self (meaning you use it now, and therefore don’t have it available to use the next day), or you might start using your own health points in place of the missing mana. 

Think about in fantasy media, when the magic user runs out of magic in the FINAL BATTLE and starts sacrificing their own life force to continue powering the spell. In some circumstances, they might drain themselves so completely that they can never use magic again, or it takes them years to recover. Similarly, a person with CFS who pushes themselves too hard one day might end up bedbound for days, weeks, or even months following. 

Another example: 

Someone with a torn ACL who stresses it during the healing process might find that it never heals completely/properly, permanently affecting their athletic ability.

TL;DR – D&D is actually a great extended metaphor for both short-term and long-term disabilities and how they impact a person’s life! 

But it does. Uh. Require some background in RPG terms and tropes in order to fully understand it. If the person you’re trying to explain the concepts to is completely unfamiliar with RPGs, you may be better off with sticking with something more basic like Spoon* Theory (or the Unified Cutlery** Theory).

Citations etc. under the cut.

*See Christine Miserandino's spoon article here: https://butyoudontlooksick.com/articles/written-by-christine/the-spoon-theory/. Learn more @thespoontheory

**Unified Cutlery Theory, very overly simplified: Spoons = Energy, Forks = Things That Make Your Spoons Worth Less, Knives = Something You Need Help Addressing Or It’ll Make Things Worse

See @jenrosess' original post here: https://www.tumblr.com/jenroses/635100154258735104 and the update including knives here: https://www.tumblr.com/jenroses/635100154258735104/sheepscot-cipheramnesia-jenroses-have-i

(Apparently there are two competing Fork Theories? The one I'm used to is the one referenced above.)

***Mana and spell slots metaphors are really hard to source, y'all, so if you have links please add them in your reblogs!

71 notes - Posted December 5, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

testing something

525 notes - Posted October 22, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[tekni-kali]

Day 22

10:11p, Saturday, May 20, 2023

This today has been quite an enjoyable today!

10:52p - murrrr!! I got sidetracked :( It is now 10:52 and the reason I got sidetracked is very exciting though, so I suppose it's not worth getting too sad face over.

Newho...TODAY WAS A GREAT DAY!! We adventured to the beach! I partook in a bit of sea bathing, head underwater, treading water deeper than I am tall. The water was beyond fathomingly comforting. I wrote in my journal! I think I'm going to type the entry here...ready? Here we go:

5:09pm, Saturday, May 20, 2023 I am at the Beach with Behb! I took pictures, maybe one day I'll actually buy photo paper & print one...maybe I'll leave space here so I can tape it in!! How many lines?

Mmm...Here seems good...so yeh! Em listening to music, actually super comfy. NGL... I am listening to the Kira Kira album by The Irresistable Force. It's a great vibe! The journal is on the pillow, that is serving as a table, propped up against my footrest for the lounge chair. The breeze is amazing. I'm texting my mother, pausing to look out across the vast gulf to my left every so often. My mom (Lady) is in NYC atm...apparently she logged her PR [runner lingo - personal record] for running in & completing a half marathon. She sent video of her engulfed in a crowd of others running through a rainstorm. I scolded her. -----------------> moving on. I am excited to be writing at the beach again! I got in the water! Did I write that already? Oh...IDC...at least now I'll remember how pleased I was with the experience of partaking in a bit of sea bathing at the Sandkey! KIRA KIRA IS COMPLETE, WHAT WILL I LISTEN TO NEXT?! OH! I got a snap! Let's Check! ----------------->05:32 05:38p - It is very hard to write & talk to people on my phone by text. But it's hard to do talking at the beach & I found an album to queue any so... We are now listening to: 5AM [song], Paradise Blown [Album], 9 Lazy 9 [Artist] --- I am glad to be pausing between messages to scribble sum synapse drops. Although it requires me to divert my attention, it is also serving as the topic for actually dropping. Plus, I cherish her dearly and I am enjoying making words with her. I want to remember to write about the email...I might switch to phone though because the wind is picking up...It is nice to adjust position & I am extremely comfortable...AND pleased with the level of ease in which it is being done. The album was released in 1994. -------------------------->06.04p

11:15p - so yeah....that's what I wrote in the journal while I was at the beach today. I took a bunch of pictures!!! But, not only did we go to the beach today! We both got haircuts -- I am very happy with it! It's nice and short and hopefully will take 3 weeks to need another. Plus I finally used the leave-in conditioner I bought...It smells very nice!! [Product URL: Pardon My Fro] While laundry was laund'rin, we walked to food and came back 20 minutes late. It was Saturday and we lucked out no one else was there. There have definitely been more stressful laundry visits...at least the television didn't get turned on this time until we were leaving...so that was nice. Lupe Fiasco [Sentrock is nice!] made folding and packing a breeze. After laundry, we dropped back by the house unloaded, showered, and hopped back in the car. As we crossed over the bridge and left the island, heading an hour westbound for the beach...and just as we hit the red light after coming off the bridge...raindrops began bombarding Bex's windshield.

:D Newho...time for bed now I s'pose. I typed more than I thought, should I draft it before clicky the blue button?!

:shrug:

-11:27p

[12:04a - I posted it!...but privately ^_^]

*Made public 11:12p - 05/21.

[twosroos]

I posted 335 times in 2022

That's 335 more posts than 2021!

136 posts created (41%)

199 posts reblogged (59%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@hufflepuffprincesse

@fanboygarcia

@twosroos

@bradshawsbaby

@lt-natrace

I tagged 271 of my posts in 2022

Only 19% of my posts had no tags

#queue but pronounced cube - 83 posts

#top gun maverick - 44 posts

#top gun: maverick - 44 posts

#top gun - 28 posts

#all grown up twosroos - 26 posts

#robert bob floyd - 23 posts

#top gun fanfiction - 22 posts

#bradley rooster bradshaw - 18 posts

#robert bob floyd x reader - 17 posts

#bradley bradshaw - 15 posts

Longest Tag: 128 characters

#also i just googled the title bc i had no idea what that word was and i’m laying face first on the floor punching it ur so smart

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

All Grown Up [Chapter Four]

roos says ! this chapter has me kicking my feet and giggling for REEEAAAAALLLL!!!! I love bob &lt;3 he's <3

desc: the storm outside stops, so you make your way back home with Bob, only to find the same things keep coming up. Work, and Mike.

fluff, with a bit of angst in the middle

notable characters: robert "bob" floyd, natasha "phoenix" trace

TWs: mentions of past abuse, nightmares

ao3 link ! last chapter ! next chapter

Once the rain stops— or probably long after it does, the sky breaks to show a beautiful pink sunset that makes the clouds shimmer like liquid gold as the distant thunder rolls around the sky. From both behind and in front of you-- both halves of the storm approaching. You look up, eyes scanning the sky. It looked just like the sunsets you had seen every night during high school when you both would carpool back home after school or ice cream runs after dinner. You continue to walk, dragging a now very mentally out of it Bob down the trails, checking on the chicken coop as you pass it. Lieu and Captain make sure they sniff the ground around for an annoying amount of time before following along. 

Once you made it the half-acre trudge back to the house, your boots now caked in mud, you both kicked off your shoes at the door and walked inside the candle-lit home. Once inside, you grabbed a lighter from the drawer and flicked it on, lighting two candles your mom had left for you to carry as lights by the door as you walked up the stairs and announced you were home.

“You both made it out okay?” Jenny calls, popping around the kitchen doorway when she hears the door click locked.

“Mhm.” You hum, your fingers still laced with Bob's, “do we have towels or a change of clothes? The storms are supposed to come ‘round again in twenty minutes.”

“Tom’s brother’s driving here to give us our stuff, we’re gonna stay the night here since it’s too far to drive to his house. It’s supposed to hail, apparently, so he was at our house locking up the sheds for us.” Jenny walks over, noticing the look in her son's eyes. She presses her hands to his cheeks and murmurs, so you go to step back, but Bob’s grip on your hand only tightens. After the two whisper back and forth, and you strain yourself to not hear them, she nods and turns to you with a sad smile.

“He’ll come back around in an hour or so.” She says to you, giving you a side hug as Bob walks over to where Tom comes in the door with two backpacks slung over his shoulder, Molly nearly tripping him as she runs to her dad.

“What?” You blink, not realizing how much the phrase confused you.

“He told you about the tree, right?” Jenny says, leaning back against the doorframe. When you nod, she smiles, “he gets spacey after he talks about it. Takes him about an hour to come back around.”

Bob comes back into the room with a tired sigh with a backpack on his shoulder. Jenny nods her head to him, giggling softly as she slips away to greet her husband.

“Robby, why don’t you get changed?” You muse softly, moving closer to him, as soon as you are in reach he grabs your hand and slumps against you. Mumbling something, when you ask him to repeat it, he does.

“I lost my glasses.” 

You let out a soft huff, a smile gracing your features shortly after, “Oh, jeez, Rob. We’ll look in the morning— wait, hold on—“ You laugh as you grab his jaw with one hand, his hands flying to cup your hips as you tilt down his head to grab the muddy glasses that sit on his slicked-back hairline.

“That gels doing you no good.” You murmur to him as you start to pull him away, “C’mon. Get yourself out of these wet clothes and get into some warm stuff— I’ll get blankets?”

“Blanket,” Bob murmurs and you slowly drag him to your childhood bedroom. He follows you, dragging his feet as he yawns, rubbing his face. Once you're both in the room, you step into your closet to change while he uses your bedroom to change. Once he's announced he's done changing, you grab a bunch of excess blankets from the bottom of your closet and throw them onto your bed before you lay down on them. Bob sits with his legs up to his chest, yawning as you kick blankets over to him.

"Get warm, Robby." You say with a gentle smile, "It's cold."

After maybe fifteen minutes, the two of you curl up in your bed with blankets and such stacked on top of you. Because of a mix of the South Carolina heat and the mass aunts of blankets, you're only in a sports bra and shorts, and he's in just athletic shorts. Once you've gotten comfy, you find yourself flat on your back by the wall. Bob lays against your chest, glasses skewed from where they’re pushed against your collar bones as grumbled nonsense.

“Why don’t you go to bed, Robby?” you whisper against his hairline, one hand creeping up to scratch at the back of his neck. He made a noise akin to a whine at the contact and slumped completely against you, you laughed softly, letting him settle. As you close your eyes, your head resting against him as thunder softly rolls across the sky-- the clacking sound of hail hitting your window soothes you. Robert's in no sort of condition to keep talking about the argument, though you want to apologize for pressing him you also know now is not the time. Not at all. But as the storm lulls you into a sanctuary. You lay there for a while, not able to sleep, maybe thirty or forty minutes passing. As you shift, your leg well on its way to falling asleep under Bob's weight, you feel something buzz at your hip. You know your phone is dead, which means it has to be Bob's. You curse grabbing the device from under your thick blankets and flipping it over to see the caller I.D— ‘Phoenix :)’

His front seater. 

“Bob,” you shake his shoulder and he blearily looks up at you and whines as you wake him up. You show him the phone and he squints.

"It's Phoenix," You supply to his tired mind and you watch it click.

“If— if it’s Phoenix it’s okay. She knows how I get.” He says seemingly a bit more awake than before, “she'll ask to facetime. Quick, quick do it first!"

“Okay okay,” you giggle, grabbing his phone and answering the call, shifting so Bob’s in the frame. He grunts, lifting a hand to hide the light behind Phoenix as she loads onto the screen. Seemingly still in sunny California if you guess the time difference right.

“Bob!” She calls and he says a soft hello, pausing when he sees Phoenix pull down her sunglasses and angles her phone in the shade. She's trying to get a better look. Then she asks, “who’s that?”

See the full post

101 notes - Posted August 15, 2022

#4

Attempting

roos says ! is this in character? no idea. rooster plays a big role here bc i can imagine him being fed up with everyones shit very quickly. also fanboy playing guitar is such a good idea i love it. also this being called 'how guitar??' in my docs is rlly funny to me, thought I'd share :)

desc ! you've worked at the Hard Deck for a few years now, and everyday you swear you fall more in love with your job. Little do you know, the Daggers are enacting a plan on Fanboy's behalf-- an attempt to swoon you with live music.

genre ! pure fluff baby

TWs: drunkenness, cursing

Being a server at The Hard Deck was probably one of the best post-college decisions you had made. In the past three years that you'd worked there, Penny had become more of a mother than a boss, and your co-workers were like sisters. The restaurant was one hundred percent your second home, and if you found yourself bored at home, there was always something to be done there. It was not the only job you had, freelance didn't pay consistently enough though, so you found yourself working at both The Hard Deck and a small boat rental company on the shore for vacationing families in San Diego. Moving to California right after graduation was the worst post-college decision you had made. Rent was high, jobs were hard to come by, and even with your three roommates in your two-bedroom apartment, you still struggled to make every end meet. But you made it work, with the help of your co-workers, your perseverance, and a shit-ton of luck you somehow had. The day was winding to an end, the golden sun cresting over the ocean and shimmering the day's goodbye across the sky in vibrant hues. You snuck a picture on your phone, sending it to your roommates with an inside joke caption before you shoved it in your apron and adjusted your shirt. The low-cut v-necks were a new uniform piece, and optional compared to the usual button-up shirts or the custom company tees. The cut didn't bother you, but, as you served around a group of regulars-- the Iron Daggers, you'd come to call them, since it was their Squadron's nickname, you caught the eyes of the man who simply would not stop staring at you since you'd served him months ago. Fanboy, his name tag read, and luckily for you, it was a busy Saturday, so you didn't have to keep his dark eyes gaze with his soft grin pushing up his tanned cheeks, and ugh, why was he so... perfect? 

He was nice, you'd spoken a few times. He was from New Hampshire, hated the cold, and moved to California the second he got the opportunity to. He was in the Navy now, and you respected his line of work but weren't the type to settle down. Even years after graduating with a master's degree in Architecture, you still needed to land a solid job you could keep. And nothing in this area was lasting you longer than six months, or it paid job-to-job, which you fucking hated. Sure, it was nice to have a couple of thousand dollars dropped in at once, but it wasn't sustainable for your compulsive buying habits.

You made your way back to the servers station, tugging up the v-neck and huffing, reminding yourself mentally to wash your other work shirts when you got home. As you stood on your toes to grab a pitcher, someone else kicked open the swinging door and groaned as they set down the various plastic baskets of fries on the dish shelf.

"How long do you think we'll go until the jukebox gets shuts off?" A fellow server, Savannah, asks as she starts dumping the fries into the trash and the plastic bins into a dish tray. Her long blonde hair is pulled up in a perfect ponytail, the whispy hairs framing her face. She always looked so flawless, it made you a bit jealous, but you knew she'd taken a lot of time to care for and nurture her look. She did a wonderful job.

"Give them two rounds." Amelia comments from the other side of the server station, she's propped up on a counter, idly typing away on her laptop with one earbud in. You chuckle to yourself as you carry the two pitchers in one hand over to the other side of the kitchen, throwing a towel over your shoulder as you grab ice from the cooler and a scoop for the ice. You bend over to begin filling up your pitchers.

"Your mom would be pissed if she saw you on that counter, Amelia." You comment, moving the full pitcher to the side as you fill the other. Savannah walks over to a small mirror in the station and adjusts her hair and makeup as she chuckles along to your comment. 

Amelia pointedly rolls her eyes, "She's with Maverick today."

"Oh god, another woman lost to the Navy." Savannah salutes and you blow a huff out of your nose with a smirk, rolling your eyes as you use a small "drink gun" (which was essentially a soda fountain in a hose) to fill your pitchers. The six kids there were absolutely downing every small cup you gave them, so this would be easier, for you and their parents who had to flag you down every five seconds.

"Be careful, Y/n might be next." Amelia looks at you over her laptop screen, "I saw Fanboy checking you out."

"That's a him issue." You say, "And I refuse to date Navy."

Savannah turns back to you with an overexaggerated pout, "Awe, why not? Fanboy's cute!"

"Nope, no Navy." You say, and then you perk up when you realize the music had stopped at some point during your conversation, "Are the Daggers on their first round still?"

"Just got the second from Macie at the bar. Shit, it took that little time?"

"Unsurprising." Amelia smiles, putting her second earpod in. You grab both of the pitchers, shrugging to Savannah in a sort of 'we knew this would happen gesture which she giggles at before you dip out of the kitchen with the pitchers in hand.

Now, what usually happened when the jukebox got unplugged was Rooster would saunter over to the piano and serenade everyone with Great Balls of Fire. But that was not what was happening, because someone was playing the guitar.

Who the fuck brought their guitar to a dive bar?

You recognized the tune immediately though, it's 'I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For,' a song you'd loved for as long as you could remember, and you recalled you'd been humming it only an hour or so ago when the Iron Daggers had first walked in. Which you only remembered because Fanboy had commented on it then. As you set the pitchers down at the table of kids, the Mom smiles.

"Those aviators always surprise me with their talents." She whispers as if trying not to interrupt the pretty acoustics. You can't help but agree, watching the mostly tipsy aviators sing and sway over by the piano's nook. Rooster joins on piano, and the whole bar starts to hum along. It's a lot slower than usual, but the joy in singing and being together is clear on everyone's smiling faces.

Then, you realize who's playing guitar as you see his eyes meet yours across the dimly lit bar.

"I didn't know he could play." You say the mother and she smiles, turning to her husband and singing as you find yourself entranced as you slowly move a bit closer to where the aviators sit. Fanboy plays the guitar nimbly, his fingers not once dragging along the frets as he strums the tune out. Subconsciously, you smile, before realizing just how long you've held eye contact and breaking it in favor of slipping away and further into the bar.

--

The next time the daggers are in the bar, Phoenix, Halo, and Coyote are seated at the bar while you're working behind it. The three have ordered enough alcohol to support a small army, which you assume is the pilots behind them, plus a few older pilots you don't recognize. You spot Maverick between two men you don't notice, both have their wives draped lazily on their arms, and pool ques go unused in their hands as they drink and talk with the younger pilots beside them.

"Did Mickey really bring his guitar again?" You hear Coyote ask as you pour him a B52 shot to go with his coffee.

"Head over heels." Halo comments, taking a sip of her cosmo, "He's fuckin' whipped into shape and she has no idea."

"Who do you think it is?" You ask, sliding the shot to Coyote and the look Phoenix and Halo share is enough to cut diamonds. It makes you shift, "Nevermind, the jukebox is currently being unplugged by a drunk mustache man."

See the full post

156 notes - Posted August 25, 2022

#3

All Grown Up [Chapter 2]

roos says ! yes the gif is rhett abbot, i know, shhhhh. closed proximity? yes. also, protective bob is a new favorite of mine :)

desc: bob's missed probably more than one big event, a dinner and a thunderstorm seem to tell you God-- or just fate wants you to talk it out.

notable characters: robert "bob" floyd

TWs: desc. of past abuse, narcissism, and gaslighting. cursing, mentions of fighting, threats

ao3 link ! previous chapter ! next chapter

Your plan of horse training fell out of your mind as you stood, watching both Molly Floyd and your sister as they toddled around with the horses. And it especially died when Molly called to your sister, “we should get Robby to ride Fuego when he gets here from the store!”

Shit. You were not ready for this. Not now, not ever.

“Ma, I have some laundry and such to do—“ you call across the field where she stands, watching the girls as they feed Fuego apple treats when he does little tricks you’d taught your sister to do with her. She’s now teaching Molly the same ones. You bite your lip before you speak up again, “Can I run home and do that for a bit before coming back later?”

“Are you sure you don’t wanna run Fuego before it gets hot?” Your mom asks, sending you a look. When you meet her eyes with a bugged-out look in them, she huffs, waving you over. Slumping your shoulders, you make a slow walk to where she stands by the fence because you already know what she’s gonna say. She’ll tell you to talk to Robert, then say how much he’s missed you or something along those lines.

“Talk to Robby.” Your mother murmurs, “lord knows he’s missed ya.”

‘Two for two,’ you think bitterly.

“Ma, it’s been like… nine years since he moved away. And it’s been five years since we last spoke in person. We’ve texted like… once every other month, sometimes even longer, since that thanksgiving party when his mom forced us to talk and gave him my number.” You grumble, looking away so your mother can’t see the genuine upset look in your eyes, “I don’t think there’s any more dynamic duo.”

“Yes, there is, you’re just being stubborn. I don’t know what happened between the two of you before he left, but c’mon. You both were twenty the last time you spoke in person, and it was awkward as hell to watch, now you’re both twenty-five.” she sighs, “Get your head out of your ass.”

“My head is nowhere near my ass, excuse you,” you say, but find you want to be like an ostrich in the sand when a beater Chevy pick-up pulls up to the barn with a low rumble and a crack of its missing cylinder. You want to curl in a ball when the engine shuts off, and the door opens, Molly screaming her brother's name as she slips back through the fence.

“Just look at him—“ your mother whispers, idly smacking your shoulder as she slips through the fence to help her horse— Aster, who got his leg stuck in the feed again. 

He wasn’t actually stuck, he just liked to complain until he got help.

So, against the burning in your stomach, you look to see him. And Robert Floyd has changed, drastically. He’s still wearing the same thin wired aviation-style glasses, he doesn’t really need them for anything other than reading and flying— but he’d told you that fateful thanksgiving when he looked relatively the same in his bulky hoodie and jeans, that he liked to wear them because he’d ‘never forget them that way.’ Which wasn’t true because two days later you were shipping them to a Naval postal office in Nevada. 

His hair is much shorter now, no longer at its beautiful shoulder length. You had loved to run your hands through its slight wave, you also loved to braid it or put it up in little ponytails. His scruff was growing in a bit like he was taking an opportunity to not shave now that he was home for a few weeks, and he had a newly healed scar across his lower jaw that still left some bruising by his ear. But other than that, he was still Robert. (Your Robby, you remember calling him as a kid, when you two were actually ‘married’ with Ring Pops you bought from the gas station at the end of the road.)

But one thing stuck out to you, in the summer heat he wore a thin white tee, and you could see every bit of muscle definition he had in store. Sure, he had always had a bit of muscle, and as a more reserved person you only got to see it when you went swimming or boating with him, but now it almost strained the old shirt.

“Hey Mols, Gennie.” He calls, his voice even having changed, losing a bit of its southern drawl. Then, he turns to where he hears your Mom complaining to Aster behind you and catches your eye. He lets out a low whistle that makes a smile crack across your lips subconsciously.

“You’ve aged like a fine wine,” he calls, a bit of his drawl coming back as if it was magically reborn in his throat.

“So have you.” You reply, throat dry. As much as you want to run into his arms and hug him— then slap him for leaving for so long, you feel rooted in your place. There he is, after years of wishing he would come back, and you feel so stupid because you can’t even muster a single word out of your chapstick-covered lips. (The same lips you want to press to his, you think to yourself bitterly as you scowl.)

You look like a damn idiot, you think after a beat of silence. You find yourself praying to God he doesn’t think the same. He shuffles awkwardly, sparing glances between your eyes and your body, before humming to himself.

"What, uh-- what's..." He drawls, before just stopping himself and sighing, slamming the door shut to his truck like it's personally offended him. 

"I've been fine." You pick up on what he's trying to ask instantly, it's just like he's back in high school trying to start a conversation with someone new again, "I went to college for Equestrian studies, in Savannah, and then I came back home. I live in that little cabin on the property, like a little apartment. My mom and I fixed it up after December."

You didn't need to tell him why December was important, he wasn't there. He’d also never met your ex-boyfriend. Bob would’ve known immediately Mike was gonna be a douche. You wished he’d been there to help you, secretly,

You find it hard to keep your lips shut when he shifts, his arms flexing— and the only thing you can think of is how he’d probably be able to knock Mike out with one hit.

Bob stammers, “What-- uh. What do you do now?"

"I run a horse sanctuary and training facility about a half-hour to the coast. I help do rehab, run events, and do private barrel racing and show lessons for kids." You explain, "I also do equine therapy for kids, we're doing a thing with the Air Force next month for retired veterans. Uhm." You shuffle on your feet, "what about you?"

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182 notes - Posted August 11, 2022

#2

meet the bradshaws

( bradley “rooster” bradshaw x fem reader )

authors notes: me?? writing an x reader? oh my god im lowkey freaking out, this is so out of my comfort zone I hope it’s okay D: !! it’s a bit short because I ran out of steam and I’m not used to x readers at ALL.

for this au Goose is paraplegic and uses a wheelchair or a rollator !!

main characters: nick “goose” bradshaw, carole bradshaw, bradley “rooster” bradshaw

tws: talks of injury, rollator/wheelchair use, self-doubt, a few sex jokes/references to sex and/or sexual actions but no “on page descriptions”

Despite Carole and Nick living in San Diego, you’d never actually met them face to face. And, despite Bradley promising you that his parents would love you, you felt absolutely terrified. Goose was regarded as one of the best RIOs Top Gun had seen-- according to Hondo and Warlock, so you thought it was natural to be terrified of the man. Okay, maybe it wasn’t, because you’d heard such nice things about him, but all you could think is that you’d somehow screw this up.

This was a huge deal for Bradley, who you’d only been dating for about a month now-- since the mission was over and your squadron was stationed somewhere away from his, so you could date without being reprimanded by the higher-ups. No fraternization was a pretty good rule, but damn hard to follow.

But as the weeks had winded down, Penny had called you about having a party at her house for the pilots and her family, since the medal ceremony and dinner would be the day after. You’d agreed, even after feeling all party and ceremony-ed out before you found out the Bradshaws were gonna be there.

You were totally, perfectly, normal and not absolutely dreading your meeting with them. Everything was normal, and fine, and no you were not about to cry over this stupid dinner. There was no reason to be so stupidly stressed!

To distract yourself from spiraling-- and to make sure you were on time, you slipped on a modest but very flattering baby blue floral sundress, one you knew Bradley adored and one that made you feel good. It hugged you perfectly, and was loose at exactly the right points, making you look like a runway model (as you boyfriend had said before trying to slip his hands under the skirt a few nights prior) You had chosen the bathroom as your getting ready area, Bradley taking the bedroom because really all he had to do after his shower was change.

You pinched the dresses fabric, unrolling it from where it had tucked in on itself when you’d slipped it on as there were three knocks place on the bathroom door. Once the skirt was settled and modest, you nodded to yourself.

“Come in, hon.” You called, leaning across the sink to put in these beautiful golden set stud diamond earrings Bradley had gotten you for your birthday only a few weeks back. As soon as Bradley could see you he wolf whistled, leaning next to you to kiss your cheek as he wrapped an arm around you lazily.

“You look amazing, baby.” He murmured against your skin, kissing your cheek again, then lower to your neck, and then your collarbone, and you laughed.

“Maybe later, Bradley.” You took one hand to gently place on his neck, pushing him back from leaving any stray love bites on your skin. He awed softly, jokingly pouting, before quickly pressing a happy chaste kiss to your lips as he slipped behind you, moving to his side of the double vanity in your bathroom. Newly renovated thanks to you.

“My mom is so excited.” He comments as he grabs some gel to put in his hair, you smile softly, watching as he styles himself for a moment before rummaging through your makeup bag to grab your lipstick from the counter. It was Bradley’s favorite shade, a dark pink color that complimented your skin beautifully.

“I’m more nervous than I thought I would be.” You sigh, leaning across the vanity again to apply your lipstick. It was just going to be a dinner at Penny’s house, with Maverick and the rest of the squadron to celebrate their successful mission. You shouldn’t have been as stressed as you were, it was stupid to be so stressed. But you felt seconds away from a breakdown.

It was getting harder to see through glassy eyes, and you had to quickly finish up your lipstick and blink away your tears forcibly. Though, you can't hide anything, because Bradley pauses when he sees your tense face and turns, wiping his hands off on a towel before gently grabbing your face,

“Hey, relax,” He murmurs, “I promise it’ll be okay. My mom can be a lot when she’s excited but she says and does everything with love. Every single day this week she’s been asking me if you’re coming and she’s-- according to my dad, atleast, been dying to meet you since I told them we were dating.”

“But what if something goes wrong?” You blink up at him, trying not to cry, “What if they hate me? Or think I don’t deserve you?” 

He frowns at your tears, leaning down to give you a soft kiss to attempt to cheer you up, it doesn’t work as well as he thought, “My mom already loves you, and I promise, If Maverick likes you, my dad will too, I promise.” 

You sigh, wringing your hands out, “okay, fine.”

“Yes.” He says, grinning as he adjusts your necklace so it lays flat on your neck, “It’s fine. Everything's a-okay.”

--

Bradley’s blue Bronco rumbled to a stop, the old engine clicking as Bradley turned the key and sat back for a moment. Then he turned to look at you with a soft, goofy, smile as he grabbed your hand off the shifter and kissed your knuckles. Something he always did after driving with you, or at any red light.

“Ready to meet the Bradshaws?” He asked, though it wasn’t really like you had a choice. He was clearly so excited, by the way his grin made his eyes crinkle fully, and he let out a giddy laugh.

“Yes, I’m ready.” you reply even though you very much aren’t ready to meet his parents. He grins even bigger somehow, giving you a quick kiss, before slipping out of his door. You lean down to collect your bags, your purse full of your swimsuits for later in the night after dinner, as he opens the door to let you out. As the door swings open, he hold out his hand and you gratefully take it as he helps you hop out of the Bronco and onto the street. As you look you can see Maverick’s bike parked behind Penny’s car with Phoenix’s Pontiac, Hangman’s truck, and Payback’s SUV all in a line parked behind an old Ford pickup. So, hopefully, everyone else was already here, nd it would help you alleviate any awkwardness.

Your stomach twists at the sound of loud laughter from the back deck you don’t recognize. It’s feminine, and not Phoenix’s low cackle, Amelia’s loud laugh, or Penny’s chuckle, meaning it has to be Carole. Plus, who else would have a laugh exactly like your boyfriend’s?

The only thing passing through your brain is how terrified you are, you don’t even notice Amelia waving from the side gate, announcing, “Rooster’s here with Y/n!”

Fucking Goddamnit.

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201 notes - Posted July 31, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

All Grown Up [Chapter One]

( robert "bob" floyd x fem!southern!reader )

roos says ! we need more bob appreciation. i love him. my boy :) also I am not southern, so i apologize if i'm very off with this-- this chapter is a bit short since it's technically a prologue but I'm not really gonna call it such.

desc: as summer rolls into it's time in south carolina, you find yourself surprised when your old next door neighbor returns-- looking and acting completely different after a few months on the west coast. the two of you have a lot to talk about, after you remember the good times, of course.

fluff, with spicy kissing at the end

notable characters: robert "bob" floyd, and that's kinda all, it's pre-uranium mission time y'all :D!

TWs: underage drinking (past tense), mentions of hook-ups, spicy kissing?

ao3 link ! next chapter

The morning dew sparkled on the sides of every blade of grass in the long field on your parents farm. It's stark, plain green path was dotted with a dark log-cabin themed barn on the top of the hill, leaving around two acres of fenced in land for a few horses, cows, goats, and other livestock to amble about on its right, and about a half-acre to the left used for more deliberate things, like the horse training you'd planned to do today. The soft sound of a low cylinder motor hums as it accelerates up the fenced off path, you're driving the busted up farm truck with one hand on the wheel as you slide your hat-- an old stetson gifted to you from the neighbor-- on your hairline as you bring it to a park in a dead grass spot. You parked off the driveway too much, your mom had given up yelling at you for it.

Looking up, you see the sun as it begins to peek over the tops of cypresses, pines, and hemlocks, letting its golden glow dance on geraniums and indigo flowers planted by the barns entrance but far enough away from the fence so they won't get eaten by the horses inside the barn. The window stays rolled down as you climb out, the morning dew in your lungs as you take a deep breath and start whistling the same song you always do as you begin to undo the lock on the barn. Considering its the building closest to the street, its got quite a few locks on it just in case of any attempted break ins. Luckily, no one has tried in the past decade.

As you swing the gate open, you’re met by a chorus of animals, waking up for the day as you swap your boots for a set of riding boots as you yawn, moving to the side to begin opening up the side doors in each stall to let the animals out. Majority of them leave, ambling out into the grassy field to take in the morning sun. Your horse-- a black-ish brown quarter horse, bumps her head into your back and you laugh as you turn to bump back her nose.

"Relax, Fuego." You murmur as you slip into her stall, moving to open the back gate so she can do what she does every morning-- take a sprinting lap around the place. As she, and the other horses in neighboring stalls do what they want for about an hour, you spend your time grabbing the food, water, and other things the animals need from various locations around the barn. The sun rises higher, white puffy clouds rolling through the sky as planes float idly ahead. you huff, grabbing your riding gear, before theres the sound of a car door slamming. Setting down the saddle in your hands, you walk to the front door, smiling when you see your neighbor's daughter-- a five year old by the name of Molly, patting your horse on the head as she leans herself over the gate and low enough for Molly to reach on her tiptoes.

"Hey, Molly." You call and she turns, a hot pink cowboy style hat on her head as she runs over, her pink boots splashing mud puddles from last nights storm.

"Y/n!" She cheers, grabbing your hand and jumping, "Robby's home!"

"Robby?" You ask, lifting your head to look at your mother, "Floyd's back?"

"Mhm. Got in last night, he swung by the house this morning with his mom to drop off his sister for a playdate today." Your mother grins, "Genevieve ran straight for the cows, she's lookin’ at the calf, right down the fence."

Your mother pointed down the fence line where you could see your younger sister petting the cows and baby talking them-- just like you did when you were a kid.

"How long is he home for?" You ask and Molly giggles swinging herself as she uses your hand to keep her from falling.

"He's back until July when he leaves for a mission!"

"He leaves the fifth." Your mother clarifies and you nod, a soft smile gracing your sun-kissed skin from the time you've spent in the heat of South Carolina. Just like all the years you had spent by Robby's side, the sun had caused freckles to bloom across your shoulders, shown by the skin-tight tank top you wear over your riding pants.

And, oh god, Robert's home.

When he'd left, it had been awful. He refused to tell you why he was moving other than the word 'bootcamp' and you'd had a sort of half argument over it. Though, you could never stay mad at his goofy half smiles and confused squints whenever you said something he didn't quite understand. There had been multiple nights in your lifetime where you both stumbled back to your house after parties, or just drinking in the various fields around your house, climbing in the never locked storm door to crash on the basement couch. Your parents never asked, neither did his. They'd say you were Bob and Y/n, a dynamic duo, never seen without each other and never seen arguing.

But, he'd left four hours after your first time kissing him. Sure, it had been because he wanted to know how to kiss before he moved away from home, assuming the tales friends had told you two about hookups and such in the college experience; over beers in your basement, had been true.

And god, you weren't ready to see how he'd changed after your mother had told him he was in the Navy. And all you could think of was his last night in your house, right before he had to leave for bootcamp. Two weeks after the end of your senior year.

...

Senior year had been the year for the two of you, despite the revamp of the rumor you two were dating, again, and making it impossible for you to find any sort of partner other than each other for every school event, you didn't care. Bob was your best friend, and you'd never do anything to change it. You were prom king and queen, and most likely to marry for tax benefits in the accolades section of the year book. But never once had you kissed, or even romantically held hands.

From your first day of kindergarten, to graduating middle school, to your senior year homecoming game as cheer captain, and his senior year homecoming game as drum major, to your senior year graduation, you were stuck at the hip. Inseparable. You could sit in a room for silence for hours and never get bored, or watch the same movies and shows you could quote over and over and enjoy it. And you spent a lot of time gossiping over stolen liquor bottles from the back of your dad's expansive cabinet, or riding horses thorugh back trails, or taking the farm trucks on joy rides. Bob, despite being a bit socially awkward, was your ride or die.

Until you kissed him the night before he left.

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245 notes - Posted August 10, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[calltomuster]

Star Wars Fic Recs Part the Fourth

[first fic rec list] [second fic rec list] [third fic rec list]

Been a few weeks since I've done one of these and I've read/reread some great fics recently so let me share them with you now!

And I Fear Nothing by @maiseey (Obi-Wan/Cody, WIP, 11/? chapters, 43.4k words) Picture this: I am sitting in the parking lot of my local grocery store, having just bought a load of perishables. I get the email that And I Fear Nothing has just been updated. What do I do: run home to preserve the food I just paid for, or sit in my car and read the new chapter right away? The answer is obvious, of course! That is exactly the situation I found myself in last week when chapter 11 dropped and I did in fact choose to read it in spite of my groceries, that's how much I love this fic. In this fic, Obi-Wan and Cody are raising Luke and Leia together on Tatooine, and they've got so much trauma, and new + old wounds, and love for each other and the children they're raising that it both warms your heart and tears it apart. But that's not all, this fic expands beyond just the small home in the middle of the Jundland Wastes and explores Ahsoka and Rex and their journey to de-chip as many clones as possible. I love this fic because it doesn't shy away from hard conversations, but it does it in a way that makes you want to cry and give everyone involved a hug. Plus, there are some fantastic minor clone characters that you will 100% want to die for by the time you finish reading. Cannot recommend this fic enough.

Obligate by @communistkenobi (gen, one-shot, 23.9k words, Obi-Wan & Anakin & Ahsoka) Just when you thought the Deception arc didn't have enough pain, this AU sees Anakin fake his death instead of Obi-Wan! My heart is physically ripped out of my chest just thinking about this fic, so imagine what it'd do to you actually reading it. Anything @communistkenobi writes is so well-done and I've gone through his works list on AO3 multiple times, but somehow I missed this when it was first posted and it was like a wonderfully delightful surprise when I ran into it the other day. So, so good. Highly recommend!

Moirai by damonkey (gen, WIP, 4/? chapters, 9.2k words, Obi-Wan & Qui-Gon) All I can really say about this fic without giving anything away is that it's a Phantom Menace AU and it's so intriguing. The author is very deliberate in having a vague summary and only tagging as the story progresses, so I truly have no idea what's ahead of me but it's so -- as I said -- intriguing that I'm happy to strap into the ride. Ahhhh I'm skimming through the fic and there are so many things I want to mention but I don't want to give anything away!

Almost Home by @frunbuns (gen, one-shot, 5.2k words, Obi-Wan & Anakin) You know, every time I recc a Modern AU I'm like "I don't usually like Modern AUs but..." and then proceed to gush over the fic. I went and checked and I've recced a Modern AU on almost every fic rec list I've made! Maybe I do like Modern AUs?? Or maybe the fics are just that good -- and this fic is definitely that good. In this fic, the first of a planned series of fics set in a modern Star Wars universe, Obi-Wan is reeling from the loss of his adoptive father Qui-Gon and has to care for a young Anakin. Ooooooof. Definitely hits you right in the feels, this one. Love the non-chronological storytelling too!

Naked and Not Paid by biscuitlevitation (Obi-Wan/212th Attack Battalion, WIP, 6/? chapters, 14.9k words) This fic is essentially ~15k words of the clones thirsting over Obi-Wan and it is the funniest thing I have read all year. I'm not kidding, I just read the last chapter which features space-church-lady!Anakin and I laughed so hard I cried. I'm cracking up just thinking about it. I promise you will have a good time reading this fic. And if the tag "Obi-Wan Kenobi/212th Attack Battalion" puts you off, let me just say there's no sex in this at all, it's just thirst. And it's hilarious.

Full Disclosure by @trixree (Obi-Wan/Cody, WIP, 2/3 chapters, 7.4k words) ROTS AU in which the Force bonds Obi-Wan has formed with a few members of the 212th save them from the chip and Order 66, but it doesn't stop the devastation from happening on a mass scale and they all have to try and deal with Mustafar and Luke and Leia. This fic manages to be both extremely soft and extremely gut-wrenching at the same time, and I wish I could leave more kudos. Full disclosure (get it, little pun there for ya), I will be dying until the final chapter comes out. Time to go listen to Olivia Rodrigo and reread this fic and just live in my feels.

Thirteen Days by @ewanmcgregorismyhomeboy12 (gen, one-shot, 4.1k words, Obi-Wan & Anakin) Post-Zygerria arc, Anakin dresses an unconscious Obi-Wan's injuries and struggles. Ahhhh this fic is one of my favorite Zygerria arc fics, and given that that's my favorite arc, that's saying a lot! Obi-Wan doesn't say a word in this fic, but his presence is very much there, if you know what I mean. And the descriptions of injuries here are pretty graphic at times, but it's so good that you'll want to keep reading even if you have to do it through the fingers covering your eyes.

brother, let me be your shelter by @kenobilovebot (gen, one-shot, 1.6k words, Obi-Wan & Anakin) This fic packs so much tenderness in a short amount of words. It covers an AU in which Obi-Wan's issues from Zigoola never really resolve, and Anakin finds out when -- well, you'll just have to read for yourself. I love Zigoola because it is such an excellent whumpfest for poor Obi-Wan and this fic is great for that, but also highlights Anakin and Obi-Wan's relationship.

A Padawan At War (Again) series by @itstimeforstarwars (gen, 3 parts, 100k words, Obi-Wan & Anakin) In this series, Obi-Wan and Anakin are transported from The Phantom Menace into the Clone Wars and have to deal with all that comes with it: fighting wars, discovering a Padawan you never knew you had, dueling your grandmaster who apparently is a Sith Lord now(?!) and all the rest. This series is a great ride, and I look forward to every update. Note: the first fic in this series is a one-shot that was expanded upon, and it drops you in media res. The second fic is a prequel that shows how they got to that point, and the third fic is the sequel that shows what comes after.

The Desert Storm series by @blue-sunshine-mauve-morning (complete, 24 parts, 1.144 million words) There has never been a better time to start reading this series. If you read Star Wars fics on AO3, then you've definitely seen the Desert Storm series before, but maybe you were daunted by the high word count, or felt like it would be too much effort to go all the way to the beginning of a series but couldn't just jump in halfway. Let me tell you, it's 100% worth it, and now is the perfect time to read this series if you haven't already. This series is complete, but it turns out it's all just Act 1 of the larger story, which will continue in the Rise and Fall series. @blue-sunshine-mauve-morning is taking a break right now before starting the next series, so you have ample time to get caught up, and YOU REALLY SHOULD. Let me tell you, this series had me on the edge of my seat more than any other piece of media I can remember. With the most recent chapters, where everything that has been building for a million words came to a head, I would get so worked up after each chapter that beforehand I would have to queue up calming things to watch afterwards, and it still wouldn't be enough and I'd be too full of feelings to get anything done the rest of the day. Seriously, this series is amazing. And if you HAVE read it before but haven't reread, now is the perfect time for that as well. I've reread this series multiple times and it's so rewarding because the author sprinkled in so many hints as to what will come that you only understand the second (or third) time around. I know I've written a lot for this rec but this is a long series and it deserves it. Go read! Now!

If you like any of these fics, please consider reblogging so they can get more exposure! And if you noticed I missed someone’s Tumblr account, or linked the wrong one, please let me know!

[sweater-daddiesdumbdork]

Rose Red’s All Hallows Eve: Ticket Please?

Summary- 4.2k Curtis Everett x You. Your boyfriend got you tickets to a charity Haunted House, and the special features include immersed scenes from the movie of your choice. Once you hear that the one and only Curtis Everett from Snowpiercer is a part of the choices, you just have to go. Prepare for a night of apocalyptic fun! 

Warnings- Blood/Gore, brutal killings, swears. 

A/N- Written for @jtargaryen18 Haunted House 2020. This is a 3 chapter story that will be posted within a few days of one another. Be sure to read the warnings for each chapter. The page dividers were made by @firefly-graphics​ , I highly suggest checking out her work, its really excellent and a bit of everything to choose from. The manor described in this story, Rose Red, is a piece of work from Stephen King, and I highly suggest watching the tv mini series, if you can find it. Perfect for this time of year. Special thanks to @what-is-your-plan-today​ for being my Beta in this project. Happy Reading and Haunting! 😈🎃

“What do you mean Bryce that you can’t come? You promised you would! When is New York State ever going to open Rose Red to be explored like this again Bryce?” You spoke into your cell phone while looking in the mirror, currently doing a french braid to keep your hair out of your face. Your expression reflected back at you was a mixture of fury and disbelief. You had only been talking about this charity for 6 months, and here was your boyfriend backing out after he’d promised to come with you numerous times.

“Something came up with Maya, okay? You know my sister can’t do anything without fucking it up. Besides it's just a house” 

“Bryce, don’t talk about your sister that way.” You sighed exasperatedly before your voice dropped slightly conveying your disappointment “And it's not just a house, it's just the most haunted manor and grounds in New York. They had it condemned supposedly just for that reason! You really can’t come?” 

“You know that shit isn't real. Sorry Baby, but why don’t you take one of your friends? How about that Karen chick?” 

You gave a sigh and roll of the eyes, Bryce never bothered to get to know any of your friends, not like you did with his friends. “You mean Stacey? Her name isn’t Karen.” 

“Well, she’s like a Karen.” He retorted with a condescending tone. 

“Whatever Bryce, I’m hanging up now.” you snapped out, he was being an ass especially considering this entire night had actually started out as a treat to him from you.  

“Hey, Hey, I was kidding. Take Stacey. You know I wouldn’t be any fun, I never liked Snowpiercer, remember?”

“That’s not the point Bryce…” you sighed again. 

“Look, go have fun with Stacey, and tomorrow morning I will pick you up, we can go for a drive down the coast, just the two of us. Maybe have a long weekend in Hampton. How does that sound? I will even take you to that hotel you like. That one right on the beach with the view we stayed at last summer. We had fun there, didn’t we Sweetness.” now his tone was a hint of teasing and promise, and although you were still mad that he ditched you again, you felt a warmth bloom in your chest that he was trying to make it right. 

You bit your lip remembering, it had been a fantastic vacation, and Bryce really showed you a good time without ever having to leave the room. At your silence he gave a chuckle of triumph. “That’s what I thought, I'm gonna call them right now. Have fun tonight baby.” 

“Okay, but you better be here bright and early Bryce. Love-” Before you could even say the words, he hung up, and you hit the end call button, trying to get over the feeling of disappointment before you called Stacey. You could already hear what she would say, but as your best friend, she would be there. She always was. Dialing her number, you pulled out the tickets from your purse, allowing yourself a smile. 

What could you say, you were a fangirl. Snowpiercer was such an intricate dark story, you had fallen in love with it the first time you watched it on Netflix. So when Bryce mentioned his grandfather was helping sponsor a haunted house charity at the town's resident creepy manor, and it was featuring several film sets. Including none other than Snowpiercer, you just had to have all the details. It even went as far as Bryce having his grandfather putting in a good word of how much of a fan you were to get you in. You scrimped and saved, Bryce as well helped you with paying for the tickets. You had really wanted to do this with him too. No, he didn’t share your love for the story, but he was your boyfriend and Halloween was your favorite holiday. It was something you two could have shared. 

Oh well, next year we will do what he wants to do, you thought to yourself waiting for Stacey to pick up her phone. 

A familiar voice answered, jerking you from your thoughts. “What’s up? I thought you would have already left for the charity function?” Stacey questioned. 

“Slight change of plans, something came up with Maya, and Bryce can’t make it.” 

“Big surprise.” the answer made you wince, cause this wasn’t the first time you called Stacey about Bryce. “You want some company? I can be ready by the time you get here?” 

“Please?” you already had your purse over your shoulder and were heading out the door as she answered. 

“Don’t worry girl, I got you. See you in a few.” 

The line to get into the grounds was long, cars piled up as the two of you pulled to a stop. Stacey leaned forward to look out the windshield, giving a soft whistle. “Damn, they pulled out all the stops for this charity, didn’t they? Isn’t that the Rose Red Manor?” 

“Yea, they were able to get it for the night from the Governor. Pretty crazy since this place has been condemned, they were supposed to demolish it back when Ellen Rimbauer’s grandson sold it to New York. You know the stories here, don’t you? Men die, Women disappear never to be seen again. The house somehow has random room built on out of nowhere. No one actually knows how many rooms Rose Red has, and the grounds are much larger then the records state.” You let your foot off the brake, easing forward. 

“Shut up, that’s not true.” Stacey gave a shudder and you laughed, winking in a teasing manner. “How does a house keep getting bigger? I say bullshit.” 

“It’s all just for spooks, the place is safe or else they wouldn’t let us on the grounds.” 

“If I die Y/N, I’m haunting you.” Stacey jibed back, pulling up to the concession stand, and you rolled down your window. 

“How many, and what set are you here to visit?” a tired voice sounded at you while you pulled the tickets out of your purse and handed them out the window. 

“2, for the Snowpiercer, Curtis Everett set.” 

The redhead took your tickets, her green eyes flickering to check them before she gave a slight smirk of perfectly painted ruby lips. She leaned forward, to look into the car. “Curtis Everett you say? A personal favorite of mine, the set reminds me a bit of home.” Your eyes flickered to her name tag, reading Natasha Romanoff, it sounded Russian, where it is assumed the train derailed at the end of the film. “Curtis is a bit intimidating, but don’t get scared, it's all a part of the show.” She stamped your tickets and collected bracelets, handing them back to you which you and Stacey both snapped onto your wrists. “Enjoy, and make sure you have those tickets on you. The Wilford on set will be looking to collect them. Bozhe, pomiluy tebya.” God have mercy on you.

Your brows came together in confusion at the foreign launguage and gave a nod. “Thanks?” 

The woman smiled and snapped her window shut, ending the conversation. Pulling the car away to continue to park, Stacy wrinkled her nose. “What was that about?” 

“You got me. I don’t even know what language that was, I’m guessing Russian?” You watch and follow the people directing you to park and are soon in your designated spot. “Whatever, you ready?” The uneasiness slipped away as you got excited, cause lets face it, Curtis Everett had been a crush for you since you saw the movie. And now you were going to see him, well the actor in the role, once again. From what you could tell this charity was an a-list kind of deal, cause after hours of scouring online, you found nothing talking about Chris Evans doing this function. Maybe Bryce was good for something, you thought as you got out of the car, and then chided yourself for being so cruel to your boyfriend. After all, if it wasn’t for him, you wouldn’t be seeing Curtis or the Snowpiercer set. While you two were walking, apparently the last ones in the queue, you pulled out your phone to send him a message.

Hey, Stacey, and I just got here. Miss you and Love you.

 It wasn’t even a few minutes till your phone pinged back 

Have a good time and don’t get too scared. 

Smiling to yourself at the glowing screen, you stuffed your phone back in your purse and proceeded towards the front where you showed your bracelets. 

“Ahh Snowpiercer, you actually go around back. Follow me.” Your host said as he led you around the side of the building, away from the last of the people disappearing inside. 

“We're not going into the house?” you couldn’t help but feel disappointed at the idea, it was supposedly one of the most famous haunted houses in New York State. The well-dressed host turned, looking at you for a moment before putting on a suave smile. 

“Since you are special guests, I’ll wait for you after your tour with Curtis Everett on Snowpiercer. Give you a proper tour of Rose Red. But I assure you, that you’re in for a better treat, this is a truly exclusive walk though as hardly anyone gets to explore this much of Rose Red. Did you know that Ellen Rimbauer also had a private train on the grounds? It’s not documented as extensively as the house is, but many strange occurrences have happened here as well. It’s rumored that a single match light can be seen running up and down the aisles. Workers will be glimpsed from the corner of your eye in the darkest shadows. The ones that have visited the train claim to feel extensive chills, and in the engine, ramblings and whispers of madness can be heard. Most assume it's the conductor, looking for his replacement.” Your host continued, while out of the darkness a massive ominous train loomed, vines all over it, and it almost had a skeletal appearance as windows were busted out of it, and it looked pitch black in all the openings. 

“The workers used the train to bring in materials from the harbor to the construction site. And in 1903, a riot happened on the train, the crew claimed that they weren’t being compensated for the conditions, and they demanded better wages. When W. Rimbauer refused them, they put a stop to the train for good. Resulting in many deaths.” Your host led you to the front car, in which a pale man stood with a lantern and a single red rose he was twirling in his fingers, and upon seeing the trio of you, he promptly slipped the delicate flower into his robe and smoothed down his outfit. Giving a wave, he stepped down and you noticed that oddly he was wearing what looked like a luxurious robe, his bald head shining in the glow of the lamp. The more you studied him, the more you thought he looked exactly like Ed Harris in his Wilford role. You were about to ask, when he interrupted you with his own question to the host. 

“Blackwood, this the Curtis couple? We were a bit worried you wouldn’t show up tonight. Which is a shame, as Curtis has been waiting for you.” He seemed to direct his answer solely at you, his pale blue eyes glinting gleefully at you, it was the only way you could describe it, but they still sent a shiver down your back. Ed Harris or not, he was a good Wilford, you thought to yourself as you tried not to let his act give you the creeps. Stacey pulled in closer to you, hooking her arm through yours and whispering. 

“You sure we should go on this train? It’s pretty fucking creepy back here. And where is everyone else?” 

Blackwood cleared his throat with a smile. “Now ladies, the Curtis scene was very exclusive. In fact, only you two were able to get tickets. Seeing how it’s away from the main house. But I’m going to leave you in the capable hands of Wilford here as I must return for the next group. I will be back soon to give you a house tour afterward. You ladies enjoy the fully immersed experience.” 

Your host left you with Wilford, who lifted his lamp to show a path that led down the side of the train. “It’s just a way down here, Curtis will meet you inside, and take you on the tour of Snowpiercer. Now, remember, he will not be breaking character as is per his instructions. We want this to be as authentic as possible.” 

You and Stacey follow along behind his seemingly smooth stride, both of you tripping up a bit although Wilford seemed to have no issues with the uneven ground. Both of you were panting a bit when he came to a stop, and held a hand up to a ladder, leading into the darkest opening you’ve ever seen. 

“There are no lights inside?” You drawled out and Stacey braced her hand against the train to catch her breath.

“How the hell are we supposed to see? And climb in with heels? No one told us that this was going to be an expedition just to see a movie set.” the woman snapped out, and Wilford turned that gaze from you to Stacey, giving a cold smile. 

“It will all come on once you're inside, everything is in its preordained place in Snowpiercer and we are allowing you to really see it all come to life. But before you two go on, can I have your tickets please? No one goes onto the snowpiercer without one.” His grin turned eerie in the shadows on the lantern he had brought with him, and you were quick to look away from it, 

Fuck he is weird. You shudder, while searching your bag and handing over both tickets. He immediately put them in his robe and held the lantern up so you could see a bit better to get inside. Grasping the ladder, you start to climb in, Stacey following right behind, holding onto the back of your shirt. One you stumbled in, and Stacey did too, you both turned to look back out, expecting Wilford to follow you in, but the door slammed shut, and a shudder went through the train, hard enough so you both yelped, falling into each other. 

“Y/N! What the fuck is this? We have to get out of here.” You could feel Stacey digging into your arms in a panic, and you stumbled back to where the door was, your hands slamming against freezing cold metal, your palms pounding on the vibrating metal. 

“Why is it vibrating? WHY IS THE TRAIN MOVING?” You started to yell, and Stacey moved up next to you, also slamming her palms against the metal walls. Blinding light made you both yelp and cover your eyes, stumbling to land in a heap when you pulled your arm away from your face, blinking to get your pupils to focus. It was an empty train cart, windows that appeared to be filled with bright natural light lined the walls, and at each end, metal doors that have yet to be opened. Stacey takes the first tentative moves to stand up, pulling herself to look out a window and her eyes widened in disbelief. 

“What is it?” You ask as you start to push yourself up to a stand, and she shakes her head as if to shake whatever she was seeing away, muttering over and over. 

“What the fuck?” 

You make your way over, and all you can see is snow. Snow and ice, speeding past like this train were actually able to run on a track. Buildings encased in snow, making way to nothing but white, everywhere. Even the windows had frost encasing around the edges, your breaths fogging the glass. 

“How? What?” you question, beyond confused and rubbing at your face to look again. How the hell could this be? You go to reach in your bag for your phone, and look down to see it is gone. And not just your phone, your bag. Scanning the train, there was no sign of it. Panic settled in a little more now that you didn't have a way to call for help should you need it.

Stacey pressed her fingers to the glass, her tone a bit shrill as if she was trying to convince herself it was make believe. “Gotta be like we're watching a screen right? Just supposed to look like the trains moving.” Although the train gave another shudder, swaying back and forth. 

You never got an answer, as one end the doors swung open and people wearing all black spilled into the train, all carrying axes, faces masked so you couldn’t see anything discernible about them. Except for flashing teeth among happy grins. Each one hefting their ax like it was a toy. Your confused addled brain screamed at you to pay attention. Danger. But you were in too much of a shock to really focus. 

Another whoosh and you spin around to see who was coming out the other side, Stacey whimpering in fear next to you, still staring at the first group. But your eyes raked over these men, dirty and worn looking. The one in front had a wide stance, his feet braced against the rocking of the train like he was familiar with it. A black trench coat swept around him, ragged sweaters piled over a broad chest and your gaze fell onto a familiar hard face, scanning his opponent, drawing himself into a more fighting stance. Curtis Everett. 

“Oh shit” it dawns on you what scene this was and you draw Stacey closer to you, and back against a wall. 

“What? Oh god, I don’t understand what is happening.” Stacey said in a panicked voice, and you shook her a bit. 

“I don’t know either, but stay out of everyone’s way, okay? Those axes are not fakes!” The weapons they held were clearly not props, the heavy blade handles slapped in palms, and gleamed in the winter sun streaming through the windows. A touch would easily slice into anything. And these two groups look ready to hack into each other.

“Shouldn’t they help us get out?” Stacey’s eyes rolled wildly, and you gulped, seeing the large trout get passed up, and just as you guessed, the ax easily sliced into the fish’s flesh, drizzling blood down to see  along the edge, dripping down the handle and to the floor. 

“I don't think so Stace…” You whipped back to look at the opposing group, feeling Curtis’s gaze seeking yours with a glimmer of hatred and confusion behind them. For half a second, then it was back on their enemies. You could see it, the taunting lunges each group made, and just when they both broke for each other, you screamed and yanked Stacey down onto the ground as they all collided. Attempting to avoid stomping feet and falling blades, you two tried to stick to the wall, screaming and covering your heads, blood splattering everywhere above you in hot sticky sprays that rained down on your two. 

Stacey wouldn’t stop screaming, her voice piercing above the noise of the fighting, bodies started to litter the floor, and you tried to make your way towards one of the exits, your hands and knees slipping in warm fluid. Over bodies you dragged yourself when Stacey’s screaming changed to one of pain and panic. Looking over your shoulder, she was getting dragged away by her ankles, her fingers trying to find a hold in the floor, nails raking through the blood to create long rakes through all the red. 

“Y/N! Y/N! Help!” she continued to scream, and you twisted to go back for her when she was whipped to her back and her arms came up in defense, trying to cover her face or neck. 

“No!” 

Whump! This is when you lost all your control and started to scramble back for her. There was so much screaming and you never realized it was coming from you. 

Whump! The ax planted in Stacey’s chest and she jerked upwards, trying to push the blade away, and the militants foot planted on her stomach, yanking her loose. You would still see her moving, still alive. You were closer. 

Whump! this one landed on her skull, blonde hair turning stringy red and his boot planted on her face this time, crushing in her forehead and nose as he yanked it out, once more red spray flew through the air. 

Several whacks fell on her, over and over, spraying you with each yank the axe gave off Stacey's body, the militant man grinning as her blood sprayed all over him, you, any nearby person. 

You were in shock, your hands to your mouth, as you saw Stacy's body collapse into broken pieces, blood spurting out of her mouth and she went limp right in front of you. His gaze fell to you and his wide bloody grin looked like he just won the prize, his axe lifting when he was suddenly thrown back and slaughtered himself. You didn't pay attention to who took him out, only catching sight of a whipping coat snapping in the person's actions, you turned towards your best friend's body, convinced she might still be alive. This was all just for fun, pretend after all, right? Snowpiercer and the Revolution did not exist. 

“Sss-Stacey?” you crawled over to her, your hands cupping her broken face and leaning over her still warm form, doing your best to hold what remained of her face together, as if you could just piece it back together like a puzzle. You kept shaking her, although she had several gaping holes in her body. 

“Come on Stacey, we got to move.” you sobbed over her, unaware once more of what was going on. 

You didn’t notice the fighting stop or the survivors rush to look out the windows in a panic, but you did feel a hand yank the back of your shirt to slam you into the wall and keep you pinned in place. Even as you struggled to get back to Stacey’s body, lying lifeless. You didn’t notice any of these things till a growl snarled in your ear. “Girl, stop it! What’s wrong with you?” A vicious shake thudded your head against the wall, and the crack against the back of your skull made your eyes roll back in pain. The world tipped upside down, Curtis’s scowling cut face tipped around, and you went under, the blackness welcomed from the hell you just experienced. 

“Hey Curtis, she’s awake.” was the first thing you heard, your head pounding and when you started to pry your lids open, figures were blurry, moving around, flashes of light blinding you till they were blocked back out by bodies. You gave a moan and lifted your hand to your face when the larger one slapped it away, and the cold slick hand grasped your throat, dragging you forward. “Focus Bitch, we don’t have all day.” Your eyes snapped obediently to Curtis, fearful and wide-eyed as you took him in. 

In the movie, he was large, towering over others. Here, as he was staring you down, face contorted to semi-controlled rage, and leaning over you so you could feel his hot breath wash over his face, how the blood dried to crack along his cheek, and eyes that you swore were debating snapping your neck.

“I don’t understand what is going-” 

“Shut the fuck up, you’re not asking questions here. Wilford sent you?” 

“Wilford? Yes, yes.” You stutter, his fingers squeeze further and you can feel the hot tears streaming down your face, landing on his filthy hands. “He put Stacey and I in here, m-m-my friend. She was…” Your eyes rolled to where her body was twisted strangely, smeared in gore from where she slid around, or someone tripped over her. All you knew is her eyes started up at nothing now. Her wounds were gaping and bled out. 

Curtis gave you a shake, his snarl brought you back to him. “She was what? What did Wilford send you two back here for?” 

“We were here for a charity! I was supposed to meet Chris Evans, You as Curtis Everett.” your voice started to rise in a panic, your hands grasping his wrist at your neck. “That’s it, why is the train moving? Why are you all using real axes, fuck I just want to get off.” You sobbed, the survivors looked at you with disgust, shaking their heads. 

“Once you’re on the Snowpiercer, there is no getting off.” Curtis leaned back a bit, looking you up and down as if inspecting you curiously. “You’re such a fragile little thing. Just like a baby bird, all brittle bones and helpless.”  

“No getting off? What are you even talking about?” your tears started to sting your eyes, the panic settling deep in your chest like your heart was about to explode.

Curtis ignored your question, his free hand tugging at your thin sweater and shaking his head. “Fucker didn’t even send you back here properly dressed.” 

You tried to struggle and Curtis slammed you back hard enough to make you stop.

“She’s fucking whacked out of her gourd. Gotta be a kronole head someone spouting that shit.” A young man said behind Curtis, and he got in your face, tapping your cheek smartly. “Girl snap out of it, that shite fucking rotted your brain.” 

“No Edgar, this is different, she's lying. Good at it, but lying.” Curtis made to stand, dragging you up with him. You stumble in his hold, falling against his body before he dragged you along, hissing in your ear. 

“I don’t know what Wilford was thinking Little Bird, sending you back to me with this innocent act of yours. But don’t worry I will make you sing.”

[heleneplays]

BLOG ASKS

I forgot to answer, but thank you to @ravenclaw-craftsgirl, @annabelle-tanaka-official for the tag!

Keeping it short HERE with the handy read more bc my answers will be long <3

1. why did you choose your url?

Honestly, heleneplays-- it's pretty self explanatory that this was gonna be a gaming blog, dedicated to whatever I was playing... which was HPHM at the time.

HOWEVER as u can see, the focus shifted to my comfort milfs characters and my own player characters,,, who are extensions of me, if not a direct self-insert

so here's to my clownery for games and the characters and/or plot that hook me to them

2. any side blogs? if you have them, name them and why you have them.

yes but no thank <3

well

u may percieve, just this once.

THIS is a sideblog. my main is @h-doodles

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

I'm celebrating my 9th year of being in this hellsite on September 21st.

4. do you have a queue tag?

yes but i forget to use them usually,,,

it's tagged #queue or a variation of, but i'm small and lazy bc I scroll on my phone and tumblr labs' quick queue function is on </3

5. why did you start your blog in the first place?

this blog was for the good ole HPHM, but also to actually to simp for Patricia Rakepick on the side, as it was only Y3 back then and I am but a small, hapless lesbian for she

also I was. ig tired of having everything under my main, untagged, unfiltered; so here I am with a very handy sideblog

6. why did you choose your icon?

Right now it's Helene Spillane in with a boquet of sunflowers, and I picked bc this is my OC!!! and I want her to be displayed!!!

7. why did you choose your header?

It was time for a change

(dionysus!helene i love u sweetie but i'm in love with maría just stealing me rudely for a dance)

8. what’s your post with the most notes?

lemme check......

oh wow. i expected it was my shitpost on tall vampire mommy but apparently it's the most regrettable ship i ever considered making.

9. how many mutuals do you have?

I counted 51 in here, and 55 in my main, so in the range of 50-60 since some share between them.

10. how many followers do you have?

Here? around 340, already excluding the pornbots our lord and savior can't seem to flag properly.

11. how many people do you follow?

250

I used to follow over 500 something but most were inactive and I went through them with a paper shredder, but after like. I went through like 3 hellsite unfollow glitches by then.

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

13. how often do you use tumblr each day?

enough.

14. did you have a fight/argument with a blog once?

It doesn't shame me to admit that yeah, I have. Back on my old tumblr tho. Here? Well. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

15. how do you feel about “you need to reblog this post”?

I kin with the message, but honestly sometimes i'm conflicted bc I already go thru so much so. yea. personal prefs if and when i'll reblog such posts

16. do you like tag games?

Sure!

But in long posts? Good luck having me continue!

17. do you like ask games?

sometimes, they're good to personalize the traits and characteristics of my OC, but also gives like. a template if I run art ask requests.

I get fatigued easily tho, so that's why some asks are just lounging on the edge of my askbox

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh they're really, really, very good artists so im gonna assume @helgship, @lgvalenzuela, @rymushu, @astrejlau are! also @haniiebeedraws and @jayrart and @kyril-but-magical and @slytherincursebreaker as well, based on engagement <3

writers as well, esp one (1) James Shaw who I am too shy and baby to tag

@annabelle-tanaka-official, @dat-silvers-girl, @weasley-adoptee, @carewyncromwell definitely, if based on the amount of traffic I see on their asks and tags.

19. do you have a tumblr crush on a mutual?

no, but i do admire some of my mutual's themes on PC

also god, what even is a tumblr crush if not a crush?

No tags for future because i'm p sure most my tag game mutuals already answered this, but go ahead and steal if you want!

[cosmiclatte28]

Radio Romance (Doyoung x reader, Jaehyun)

This was on my wattpad too! Do check them out, I am working on my SuperM fanfiction.

Warning : Fluff, Doyoung and Jaehyun are radio DJs! Sweet ones obviously 

fluff and safe for work ;)

enjoy !!!

A great hit by Adele fades out as the familiar prelude to my beloved radio segment chimes in. The catchy yet simple jingle makes me perks my ears.

"Good evening citizens! This is DJ Doyoung"

"And this is DJ Jaehyun. You are now listening to Night Paradise of One Two Seven Regular Radio"

"Where you can relax and sleep with sweet dreams." Said Doyoung.

"The time now is nine o'clock. It is Wednesday May 8 and tonight we will receive your song requests and of course the favorite Radio Romance program is still available." Jaehyunexplains their rundown.

I go to turn up the music louder, well the channel I am tuning in right now is our Campus' radio station and since freshman days, this radio station really helps me during the stress nights before finals until the lonely nights when I miss mother's home cook meal. I really love the program, listening to music, witnessing a guy confess to a girl he likes, sometimes I just like to listen to the bickering of the DJs, and mostly I just like having sounds in my silent room. I share an apartment with a foreigner from the same country but he is currently busy. And during these nights, the radio really entertains me.

"As we collect your messages and requests, first composition tonight will be from the latest hit by NCT. As the night is still early, we think a lot of our listeners are still sticking their nose to books and papers. To energize you, we present you Highway to Heaven." Jaehyun's deep voice echoes.

I smiled; this song is currently my mood booster. Picking up my pen, I can return to read my textbook and try my best to study more; Though it is challenging for me to keep on reading, instead of singing on top of my lungs while dancing wildly. As much as I want to do those two badly, I know that my parents sent me here to the United States from the Country of Ginseng and Kimchi to learn something and be someone. Halfway through the song, I can't hold back my feelings and grab my phone.

I quickly text a private message to someone,

"Seriously.. I can't focus. Finals are around the corner. Mum will kill me if A is not present."

I Hit the send button and locked my phone. I must not get carried away into chatting. That will end my life.

After calming my excited nerves with water, the radio DJs return with different love confessions and questions.

Ranging from

"What should I do to get this girl's attention? I'm super shy while she's the total opposite." The two each suggested dating advices. Which I believe were not from their experiences. It's definitely a google answer.

"I just broke up with my boy friend, and I need more comfort songs. Can you two please fulfil my request. Thanks, and DJ Jaehyun you're the best." To which Doyoung replies jokingly "Noted. More love songs. DJ Doyoung is in charge of songs tonight. You pick the wrong guy."

"I can't sleep tonight. I need to finish 3 works by 7 a.m. tomorrow. Please tune up the bpm." Jaehyun's cheeky remarks was "I think coffee will help you better than us. Our program ended at 10.. anyways, we hope you for the best! Fighting!"

Those are messages coming into their homepage

"Now moving on to the tweets, I have.." Doyoung laughs a bit

"To @osaka_prince I really miss you, let's meet for Takoyaki this week. Call me asap. From @nct_is_life"

"You heard that @osaka_prince, someone misses you! And next we have.."

tHis time Jaehyun's soothing voice exits the stereo

"To @ice_yongie how are you doing? I heard you tune into this channel regularly. Wish you all the best for your finals. From @fire_jung"

"Right... to every students, please stay healthy, have enough sleep, and prepare for your finals." Jaehyun said and continue with two more mentions.

After that they play another hit song, this time as the atmosphere starts to go bittersweet. Their choice was Because of You by Taeil.

The sweet voice and words I understands, made a good company for me. I finish reading my books as the last beat of the song drops and Doyoung'strademark voice comes in.

"We have one more hour to accompanyyour night. Now for the news, we have one from the school's Baseball team, one from the hospital and another from the cafeteria. After the news we'll head on to the Call Me Maybe segment. Please wait for it."

Jaehyun reads the news about the upcoming grand Baseball match this Thursday, it's Trojans vs Eagles. Don't forget to come with all your Trojans attire and merchandises we all know how the season will end. Winning is our middle name.

The next news was only about reminding students to take care of their health during finals and a new boba stall will open this Monday. Discount 50% for first 100 cups.

No matter how cheap that will be, I know I can't skip class just to queue for a boba. Not if I want to have my ass bloody red.

The Call Me Baby segment comes after 2 other compositions and oddly I love this segment. Though it may be weird to some people, listening someone making a voice note on air to their special ones and getting no reply.. still there is something in my heart that likes hearing those.

Apparently a lot of calls were desperate. From 5 voice message, 2 are clearly in a phase of knowing someone and trying to win their heart, the other 3 are asking how someone has been.. clearly they broke up one misses the other one, but have no choice other than to use the radio to ask his or her condition. Ego always wins right?

I feel bad for those three who cannot directly ask how the people who used to be special to them is feeling right now. Lucky I'm not in that condition.

Then they take a break with several advertisements and music.

I leave my room to wash my face and clean my books. Well I am sleepy, but I am waiting for someone to return home.

The radio DJs are currently online with the twitter. Since it is impossible to read every tweet on air, they take time answering some lucky listener's tweets. I scroll my twitter and smiles a little when my tweet got replied.

"Have strength! You can do it~" – DJ Doyoung

I retweeted it and afterwards continue scrolling and reading a lot of replies and stories. Apparently there's much more than love and broken heart problems. Some are posting questions of which food to eat, some are just saying hi, several others requested songs; others even post thank-you letters for the two DJ who work hard to make their nights enjoyable and fun.

I glance at the clock. It is 30 minutes to their closing. Turns out two hours is not a long time. Hufht if only every two hours lectures can be this quick and enjoyable.

The last segment was the story sharing time. Basically everyone can submit their inspiring stories to the channel's email and then the team will choose which one is good to share. Tonight the speaker was none other the school's favorite baseball captain. Lee Taeyong... he shares his baseball career path. He shares his hard works, his passion, and what keeps him moving forward. His 10 minutes talk is inspiring. I wiped a tear that falls from my eye, his story is really touching.

Jaehyun and Doyoung also seem to honor the man talking on air right now. They salute his never ending passion and hard work. Taeyong gets to greet some of his fans and cheer them up. The segment ends after 15 minutes and Both DJ wraps his visit by telling all listeners to support Taeyong and his team on field this Thursday.

More tweets are read and replied directly on air, soothing songs for sleeping also fills the room.

"We did not realize time is running. It was fun listening to your feeling. The stars are starting to shine on the clear sky. You might want to take a peek out of your window for a moment.And as the night deepens,our segment must end after this." Doyoung shares his regret.

"Right, we are sad Paradise Night is over, but worry not for we will see you again this Friday. Please keep on tuning into One Two Seven Regular Radio. I am DJ Jaehyun"

"and I am DJ Doyoung"

"We present you the last composition, UN Village by Baekhyun. Sweet Dreams and Good night." The two host harmonize and the calm upbeat prelude from UN Village takes over their voice.

My phone lights up as the song almost reach its chorus.

"I'm done. Going home now.. wait for me!"

I typed a reply and turn the volume louder.

I know that, I know that, I know Yes we are now

Hannam-dong UN Village hill Looking up at the moon from the hill

I walk from my room to the small balcony. The radio song fluently escapes my opened room. Isomehow remembered that Jaehyun or Doyoung earlier said the sky is bright. Turns out I can see sea of stars tonight. It's relaxing and pretty.

The front door of my apartment opens and closes. I turn around and see someone returning home with a tired face but a smile is still there.

"Thank you for waiting me... the stars are dancing tonight and the moon is big!" His attention distracted by the picturesque sky in front of our eyes. He stands beside me, one hand over my waist to bring me close to his warm body.

You and me, umm yeah

UN Village hill, eh

Side by side we look at the moon

We sway to the rhythm and the song ends not long after it. It was a nice closing song!

"I should be the one to say thank you!" I turn my head to face him.

He looks puzzled but a hint of smugness can't escape his lips which form a smile.

"Me? Why?"

"Because you did a great job hosting Paradise Night! I don't feel lonely and I can study better. Thanks to you and Jaehyun." I hug him and bury my face on his chest.

Doyoung softens at my words and returns my hug "Anything for my girl! Now, let me shower from the sweat of walking home.. and maybe I need some ramen tonight. I'm always hungry after hosting the radio." He walks to his room and after collecting his clothes and towel, he enters the toilet.

I make my way to the kitchen. Taking a pot to boil water and choosing our favorite night snack. While he clean himself under the shower, I prepare the dish and the side dishes.

"Hmmm it smells amazing! Thanks for cooking it for me." Doyoung greets me with a fresh smell of mint shampoo and he takes the sit across of me.

"Saranghae~" he sincerely gives me a heart with his fingers and digs into the food.

After a stifled laugh, I also begin eating mine.

Once again a beautiful night spent with the best radio DJ, who is luckily mine. Doyoung... na do saranghae💛

[heyninja]

tag game ✨

tagged by @howdydowdy

1. why did you choose your URL?

So as far as participating in and really ~appearing~ in internet culture, that was late 90s-early 00s for me, and it was basically just like the tumblr username culture is now in some corners. Pick it up, put it down, sometimes it makes sense, sometimes it doesn't. So one of my rinse-repeat cycles of this I chose heyninja for my LJ and it just... stuck. For EVERYTHING. The only through line is that I walk really quietly (if you can hear me coming either something out of my control has happened or I'm trying to put you at ease because that many people have freaked out about being startled) so people started calling me a ninja.

2. any sideblogs?

I have a couple snapped up but I don't use them.

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

Since the beginning. I snapped up the URL immediately. I haven't posted from the beginning but I've always been here.

4. do you have a queue tag?

No. I rarely queue anything, so I don't see the point in...mentioning it? I guess.

5. why did you start your blog in the first place?

This kind of runs into the question of why I do anything on the internet, and the answer is: if you can figure out why I do anything anyone can see on the internet, you let me know. Before I made actual tumbr friends and started making content, mostly it was just to find things I liked and to hoard them for myself to look at. Now I just do all of it.

6. why did you choose your icon/pfp?

So Kenzi from Lost Girl is my Patronus. She's my kind of goth (I literally own one of her pairs of boots), she's brave and sweet and even if they did her kind of dirty later, the first couple seasons of her character were basically just a balm for my soul. Also I like characters that talk similarly to how I talk, and she's Team Dyson as am I. I chose this SPECIFIC shot though because this episode and scene shows her going from suspicious to smiling and I love that about her. It's also my discord icon.

7. why did you choose your header?

Desktop has no header, but my mobile is just a tiled header in different blues. I like things that aren't too busy (please see re: coming up in late 90s-early 00s - webdesign was hostile to your eyes, internet connection and any principles of simplicity)

8. what’s your post with the most notes?

This Yunmeng Bros meta post by 16 notes over this Cherry Maho meme - it's neck and neck, lads.

9. how many mutuals do you have <3?

Like...12? I don't know, I never check.

10. how many followers do you have?

Double digits

11. how many people do you follow?

Also double digits

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

I mean...the argument could be made that I am a shitpost but it's also likely I've made one.

13. how often do you use tumblr each day?

Like I'm in and out. Sometimes it's more or less, depending on how wild things are (the first week of November 2020 I was glued to Tumblr) but ehhh.

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once?

I don't think I did? Doesn't mean it didn't happen but either I forgot or I didn't classify it as important so ymmv. I did do my part in a massive call out of a toxic person in a certain corner of things but I did not receive backlash or anything from that.

15. how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ posts

I feel about the same as I did when I got the "you have to send this to 15 people or else" chain emails back in the day. Imagine getting sent one of those and having a very self-righteous 13 year old reply-all back to you and a frillion of your friends about how causation, correlation, and idiocy are not the same thing.

16. do you like tag games?

Mostly. Sometimes I forget them or the questions are ones I either have answered or I feel weird about answering, but mostly I enjoy them.

17. do you like ask games?

I like talking about myself! lol

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

Quite a few of them - a lot of them are more "famous" then me. Though I don't get a lot of apparent traction though on posts - I don't talk much just off the cuff, I'm learning I actually do seem to be getting traction pretty well on my actual content creation posts - fics or memes. So I don't know. COME SAY HI PEOPLE. I like people. Talk to me. I chatter and love people and will be ridiculous but in a goofy fond way. But yeah, quite a few of my mutuals have much higher follower counts than me.

19. do you have a crush on a mutual?

I do have a very large amount of love for one mutual in particular and she knows who she is ❄️ 💖... but I do have several, mostly bitty, little other crushes (but I'm poly and I know other people aren't so I try to keep those to myself)

Don't normally tag but if you haven't answered this and are willing:

@seokjingaycult @clockworkish @inkedscribbles @emrysmerlyn

[blazehedgehog]

Sorry to ask this, but what are your thoughts on Dunky's "I'm Done Making Good Videos" with regards to content you aspire to author vs what the average joe actually searches for

I don’t know if I’m the best person to be asking this, really.

Let’s get fully inside baseball here. Let’s pull the curtain all the way back. Actually, let’s burn down the curtain. I’m going to overshare like hell right now. Get ready for the most stream-of-consciousness rambling ever, because a lot of this has been boiling in my head and dying to get out.

For the entirety of my Youtube channel, I’ve pretty much only ever done what I want to do. Very rarely do I chase trends, or do what’s hot, or even do what people want me to do. I do whatever I feel like doing.

I have paid the price for that. My Youtube channel is 15 years old as of this year, and only now am I slowly inching towards 25,000 subscribers. I am incredibly inconsistent. What’s my channel post? Well, a couple times a year, maybe I put together an edited essay/review for a game. But I also sometimes post random, unedited, uncommentated gameplay footage. Maybe it’s a fan game, maybe it’s a gameplay demo, maybe it’s Fortnite. Sometimes, I also post remastered video game music. Every Halloween, I dump a bunch of one-off horror Let’s Plays on to my channel. And then, there’s the podcast.

I know exactly what my problems are. I don’t specialize enough, and I don’t put content out fast enough. Because most Youtube channels are, like, “shows”, right. The Did You Know Gaming show. The Markiplier show. The Angry Video Game Nerd show. And you can point at those and say exactly what they are in two sentences or less.

Did You Know Gaming specializes in informative videos uncovering obscure facts you might not know about popular video games.

Markiplier is a Youtuber that does Let’s Play videos for video games, primarily horror games, but he also focuses on general comedy skits and things of that nature.

The Angry Video Game Nerd is about one guy’s over the top reactions to bad video games.

What does BlazeHedgehog do? Well, he does a lot of Sonic fan content, but sometimes he does horror let’s plays, and sometimes he does multiplayer compilation videos sort of like Criken, but he also does music, and sometimes he makes video games and puts out videos of that, and in general he’s really low energy and sometimes there will be three or four weeks between uploads. Also he sounds like Booger from Revenge of the Nerds Snot from Family Guy (apparently).

If you come to my channel for something specific, you have to put up with everything else I upload. I could start separate channels for that content, but the barrier to entry on Youtube is so massive now that I would effectively sending those channels to their death. Videos that get 200-500 views on my main channel would get 10 views or less if they were on their own self-contained alt-channel.

So I languish. I struggle. I suffer. Youtube shows me red down arrows to tell me just how much worse I’m doing now than my last flash-in-the-pan success.

I’ve tried to chase success. It just makes me sad. I have a sense of humor, but I don’t think I can make “funny videos” like some people can. My Sonic 06 glitch video did gangbusters ten years ago, but I don’t often like kicking games when they’re down. It was a struggle to make that Sonic Boom glitch montage and that’s the reason I never followed through with Part 2 like I said I would.

My only wish is that people appreciate honesty. My Youtube channel might be a scattered mess, but that’s who I am. And more than anything, I think that’s what Dunkey’s video was about. His whole joke was about switching from thoughtful or funny videos to becoming a content farm for whatever is currently popular.

I’ve brought it up a few times here and there over the last few months, but I’ve had several brushes with the Fortnite side of Youtube recently. And there are so many dudes over there who are what I would generously call “grifters.” I follow Hypex on Twitter and routinely check Firemonkey and ShiinaBR because they datamine future Fortnite updates and often have the scoop days, weeks or sometimes months in advance.

Near the end of season 3, all three of them mentioned they had datamined “the next season” but wouldn’t say what it was because they didn’t want to spoil what was coming (the marvel season). They mentioned there were “others out there” that were spoiling things, but wouldn’t say who. I wanted to spoil myself, so I turned to Youtube.

And Youtube was a nightmare. Over and over and over, I would encounter tons of people downright thriving on the same grift. It’s an open secret that Youtube prioritizes longer videos, so if your video is under ten minutes (or I think now 8 minutes), the algorithm isn’t going to be as nice to you and won’t promote your video as well, and you aren’t going to get as much advertising money because fewer people are going to sit through a video advertisement that’s a quarter of your video’s entire length. Longer videos are more profitable for Youtube, and by extension, for the user uploading them.

So it was video after video of these guys making big bold claims about how they had all the answers on what the next season of Fortnite was, and you’re thinking, “oh wow, it’s a 17 minute video, they’re going to spoil everything!”

You load the video up and it’s some guy in his streamer man cave, he’s got his webcam on, and he loads in to a match of Fortnite with his squad. Keep in mind, this video was pitched as a news report of sorts, a big spoiling of future content... and it’s just a guy playing Fortnite with a crew. In the few seconds between matches as he queues for the next one, he stops to deliver a single shred of information, most of which start with “Hypex said...”

The one thing you came to this video for and it’s scattered like breadcrumbs across a 17 minute video of a guy just playing normal matches Fortnite to fill time. It’s not information they acquired for themselves, they all just regurgitate what Hypex said, or what other channels reported Hypex saying. 17 minutes of padding for scraps of second-hand leaks. And I found dozens of these channels, all repeating the same format, all repeating the same specks of leaked information, and all of them had 150,000 to 200,000 views on each of their videos in less than 24 hours. That’s hundreds of dollars per video on a format to scam the system.

But that’s a content farm. Those dudes are vultures. I have a hard time believing their hearts are really in it. I know it’s not a term that’s really in vogue anymore, but I see that as “selling out.” They know what they are doing and it’s to make money, not to make a community better. I mean, one of those videos was a guy who was reading Marvel comic hero profiles off of Wikipedia because it sounded like he literally did not know who guys like Iron Man, Thor and Wolverine even were. How are you in touch enough with pop culture that you’re cranking out factory-fresh Fortnite content for Youtube but you don’t know who Thor is? Answer: because you don’t really care and you’re in it for the money. Gotta hit that 15 minute threshold and put in six mid-roll ad breaks.

I could be that guy. That’s kind of what I was hoping “This Kinda Sucks” would turn in to, which would be sort of a rant video series like The Jimquisition or something. But I did not have the interest or energy to keep that up. So you get a playlist with two videos on it.

I’m sure Dunkey was just funnin’ around. Dude has 6 million subscribers. But for me, like... what he said in the video is mostly true. Following your heart and making thoughtful content you are personally interested in won’t pay the bills. I mean, as I predicted, that Jurassic Park video launched to the sound of crickets chirping. My most hardcore fans and a few curious onlookers checked it out but that was it. I’ve been working on that video since August, and it’s something my viewer base did not care about. But I cared about it, and that’s important for the long-run, I think.

The other problem, sort of a disconnect, is that I’m lucky to be in the position I’m in. I think guys like Dunkey probably make all of their money from places like Youtube and Twitch and Patreon and that’s their career. That work pays all of their bills.

My work does not pay my bills. Or it does, but it’s not enough to pay all of my bills. I am lucky enough right now that I am in a living situation where I can make fractions of money in intermittent spurts. That won’t always be the case. But for now, I get to be honest, and I get to follow my heart in whatever random, chaotic direction it feels like going that particular day. Dunkey faces a different sort of pressure than I do.

All of this is to say I have no idea what I’m doing, I guess. I make the content I want to see.

That being said, I increasingly think about something I heard Woolie say early on when he went solo for his WoolieVS channel, and that was the idea of “One for you, one for me, one for us.”

Because I’ve had more than one friend burn out doing, like, Twitch streams and stuff. You hear about Youtubers who get sick of being shackled to new releases or whatever’s popular. At some point these people wake up and realize they’ve had this struggle, maybe made some money in the process, but they’re miserable because they don’t get to do what they want to do. They’re always being pushed forward by the fans that are behind them.

The “One for you, one for me, one for us” mantra does at least keep you a little more sane. Balance in all things, right? So that Jurassic Park video, it can flop. It’d be nice if it didn’t flop, given what time of the year it is, but it’s a video for me. I have other video ideas in the chamber that I know will be for my audience, or “for us.”

I just have to stay true to myself, and to my messy brain.

[theastrophilearchitect]

WandaVision series review part 3.

You'd think I'd have learnt my lesson now--save the damn draft before you switch tabs to find the tags you want to add. But I haven't. Clearly.

The last two weeks I've posted parts 1 and 2 of my WandaVision review, because, even though by the time this goes up, WandaVision will have ended nearly a month ago, it's still all I can think about. Part 1 contained my initial thoughts and episodes 1-3 breakdown; part 2 contained episodes 4-6 breakdown, and this part will contain my episodes 6-9 breakdown and my final thoughts.

Episode Seven: ‘Breaking the Fourth Wall’ This episode was released on February 19th, with a runtime of still 37 minutes, following a 2000s-style sitcom format heavily influenced by Modern Family. 

Cue the recap, and we open to Wanda waking up in an empty bed. We then cut to an interview-style scene which I assume is based off Modern Family or another sitcom, like the interviews intermingled with reality TV, but there’s nothing to really pick apart; it’s just entertaining. The twins then run into Wanda’s bedroom and tell her their ‘game is freaking out’, and we see their controllers change over and over with that scarlet-TV texture. Billy comments that his head is noisy, an echo of the power shown in episode six, similar to Wanda’s own.

Interview-Wanda then says as punishment for expanding the borders, she plans on taking ‘a quarantine-style stay-cation’, which, written probably in 2019, did not age well. She goes downstairs to make milk, and it transforms between a carton and a bottle. These object shifts may be implying as Wanda expands the borders, she loses more and more control of even the things right beside her--the Hex is falling apart.

Cut to Hayward and SWORD setting up a new camp beside the new border of the Hex, but further back than before, likely to give them more time to move if it happens again.

Vision then wakes up in the circus the original SWORD camp was turned into, and, looking like his synthezoid self, is assumed to be a clown. He then sees Darcy, dressed as an escape artist, but she doesn’t remember him, clearly under Wanda’s control.

Wanda asks the twins if they’ve seen Vision, they ask if she wants them to look for him, and she replies, ‘If he doesn’t want to be here, there’s nothing I can do about it.’ It seems like she’s trying to defer her guilt at what she’s down to the townspeople. The twins then ask about Pietro--’Do not believe anything that man said. He is not your uncle.’ We saw Wanda blast him into a haystack towards the end of the last episode, but now he’s simply vanished. Wanda then laughs that she has none of the answers they expect her to, and makes some nihilistic comments. She uses her magic to open the door to a knock, and enter Agnes, who takes the kids next door to give Wanda some alone time. The furniture then begins to shift into pieces from the other decades, but Wanda fixes it.

Cut to Jimmy and Monica in a military vehicle they stole in the last episode, and Jimmy explains in Darcy’s hacking, she found a secret project called Cataract, to bring Vision back online--to fix the Vision. But it failed, until Wanda brought him back, which was why Hayward was so focused on Vision over Wanda in the Hex. They then meet some non-SWORD military people, who unveil a higher-grade vehicle, presumably for Monica to attempt to safely re-enter the Hex.

God, I love seeing Darcy in this show. She was the only good thing about the first two Thor movies. So Vision zaps Darcy, and she wakes up. They steal a circus vehicle--a transformed SWORD vehicle--and Vision asks her some questions about the Hex she doesn’t actually know the answers to.

The tension really builds in this episode, simply as it cuts between characters in much shorter intervals than in previous ones. We watch a montage of things in Wanda’s house shifting, then cut to an interview, where she explains that she doesn’t know what’s happening. Then, the person behind the camera asks, ‘Do you think maybe this is what you deserve?’ The voice doesn’t sound familiar, but knowing who the interviewer is, I can hear it. Wanda questions this because the interviewer isn’t supposed to talk, then cut to this episode’s advert.

This is for a drug called Nexus--’A unique anti-depressant that works to anchor you back to your reality. Or the reality of your choice.’ ‘Nexus. Because the world doesn’t revolve around you. Or does it?’ As someone who hasn’t actually read any comics, this information is very second-hand, but a Nexus Being in the comics is a powerful being with the power to alter reality and time--essentially in possession of the Infinity Stones’ powers without possessing the Stones themselves. This brings with it the implication that is what Wanda is--more than just a girl who got powers from the Mind Stone, but Nexus Beings aren’t elaborated on in the rest of the show.

Cut to Agnes and the twins; Billy says he likes it there, because Agnes’s mind is quiet, which is compared to Wanda. I want to explain the implications of this, but I’ve been trying to only spoil things as I get to them, so I’m going to keep my mouth shut, or rather... what’s the keyboard equivalent? God knows. Anyway, Agnes tells them not to worry about Wanda, because ‘she’s supermom’, which, you know, is a fun superhero thing.

Cut back to Monica, who prepares some kind of suit to re-enter the Hex. She gets in, and drives toward the barrier, but when the wheels meet it, they fail to pass, and begin to drive up the barrier, flipping Monica onto her back. The vehicle begins to rewrite itself and break apart; Monica manages to clamber out of a trapdoor in the roof. Jimmy prepares a medical thing, and the barrier spits out the vehicle. Monica turns back, drops her helmet, and plunges into the barrier, and presses through. Her body warps, we hear echoes of Captain Marvel, we hear Carol’s quote about Maria being given the toughest kid, and her body reforms, her eyes light up blue, and she passes all the way through, eyes still glowing, and we see a shots of her warped vision, almost as though she can see energy or EM radiation.

Darcy tries to explain why Wanda killed Vision to him, and though the road is empty, a traffic light is red. As it turns green, roadworkers approach, impeding them and preventing Vision from returning to central Westview. 

Monica enters Wanda’s house, who threatens her, and lifts her telekinetically out onto the street, where she is watched by the neighbours. Wanda drops Monica to the ground, but she pulls a superhero landing, with blue lights for effect--her DNA has been rewritten by the Hex’s borders for the third time, and it’s clearly unlocked something. Wanda continues to threaten her, and Monica says to do it--’Don’t let [Hayward] make you the villain,’ to which Wanda replies, ‘Maybe I already am.’ Which is fair, but then villains never think they’re the bad guys.

Agnes watches them from a window. Monica tries to talk Wanda down, then Agnes comes outside, tells Monica to leave, and takes her inside. The people haven’t questioned Wanda’s magic, or Monica’s apparent new powers, which merely shows the extent of Wanda’s control. It’s also interesting that Monica didn’t fall under her control again when she re-entered the Hex.

Cut to Vision and Darcy, the roadworks clear away, but someone with a stop sign and a queue of crossing children continue to block their way. Vision phases through the van’s roof, and flies away.

Wanda notices the kids’ show on Agnes’s TV, and the half-eaten food on the coffee table, and realises the twins are missing. She asks, and Agnes tells her they’re probably in the basement, where Wanda then obviously goes. The basement walls are covered in branches, made of stone, and there is no reply when Wanda calls for the twins. She then enters an ancient chamber, walls engraved with runes, and a spellbook on the side.

Agnes comes downstairs, stroking Senor Scratchy, the rabbit Wanda and Vision used in their magic act way back in episode two, and says, ‘You didn’t think you were the only magical girl in town, did you?’ Agnes shuts the door with a twist of her hand and some purple sparks.

‘The name’s Agatha Harkness. Lovely to finally meet you, dear.’

Purple fogs Wanda’s eyes, and cue the best moment in the entire series: Agatha All Along. This musical number essentially shows that Agatha has been behind everything that’s gone wrong for Wanda, aside from SWORD, obviously, and is such a good song. Go listen to it. Now. Immediately. Go. 

We see her screw up the magic show, send Pietro to the door, and we see her sitting behind the interview camera.

‘And I killed Sparky, too.’ Insert maniacal laughter, and cue the credits.

We sit through to the split between the animated credits and typical black and white scrolling ones, and this episode has an mid-credits scene. I checked for one the first few episodes, then gave up, and I can’t remember what it was that made me find this one, if it was just letting the credits play, or feeling the odd urge to check, or what.

We watch Monica try to find a way into Agatha’s house. She pulls open basement doors, then--’Snooper’s gonna snoop.’ Fake Pietro stands behind her, dressed in a beanie, hair no longer mostly white as per Quicksilver’s design.

This is my second-favourite episode overall, first being episode 8, and contains the biggest switch since episode 4. We meet the big bad, since Marvel is literally incapable of writing a story in which the climax isn’t between the hero and a villain with their exact same powers. (WandaVision takes this to the extreme, but that would be a spoiler.)

Episode Eight: ‘Previously On’ Released February 26th, Marvel blessed us with an episode 46 minutes long! At last! This was the second episode to completely break the sitcom format (first being episode 4, obviously), which leaves us in 2000s-themed Westview, but without a laugh track or any other sitcom elements.

We open with a recap, including Jimmy Woo’s explanation of Wanda and Pietro’s origins pre-Avengers from what I believe was episode 5. Or was it 4? Probably 4, because it was really soon after Hayward was introduced, in episode 4. Yes. Let’s go with that. 

This episode opens in Salem, Massachusetts, 1693, and we watch Agatha dragged to and magically tied to a stake, to be killed for betraying her coven of witches, by practising dark magic, but she denies it. She then relents and admits it, begs for help to control it, but the witches blast some kind of blue magic at her, which Agatha turns violet, and absorbs, killing the witches wielding it. The witch she calls mother, who also seems to be the leader of the coven, blasts her with magic after the others are dead, and as she does so, a kind of crown of the same blue light glows around her head (something I would neither notice nor question if I had not yet watched the series the whole way through). Agatha absorbs her magic and kills her, too. She steals a necklace from her mother, flies away, and we cut back to present.

Wanda tries to penetrate Agatha’s mind, but she tells her her thoughts were never available--a repeat of Billy calling her mind ‘quiet’ in episode 7, but I’m not actually sure the point of this, aside from limiting information available to both Wanda and the audience. Wanda’s Sokovian accent also returns in this scene. She tries to use her magic, but Agnes puts her in magical binds and explains that the runes in the walls mean ‘only the witch who cast the runes can use her magic’. Agatha also explains how she possessed fake Pietro--Fietro--not so she could control his mind, but so she could see through his eyes and ears.

Agatha questions how Wanda cast so many spells to control so many people, so many objects and locations all at once, when she had no magical training, which confuses Wanda because she doesn’t use incantations the way Agatha does; her magic is more through willpower and intention. 

Agatha then brings Wanda through a door, in an attempt to comprehend how she did it, and it leads them to an old, one-room living space in Sokovia--Wanda’s childhood, before her parents died. They prepare for a TV night, and their father invites young Wanda to pick, showing her a box containing various sitcoms--Bewitched, Malcolm in the Middle, I love Lucy, Who’s the Boss?, The Addams Family etc.--many of which acted as the basis for episodes of WandaVision, but she chooses The Dick Van Dyke Show. This love of sitcoms, the ideation in comparison to the Cold War outside, is where Wanda’s subconscious choice of making Westview into one--her version of a paradise for herself and Vision.

Then a bomb goes off outside, killing their parents and leaving Wanda and Pietro in rubble. A bomb lands before them, Stark Industries written on the side, but their television is behind it, and Dick Van Dyke still plays. 

Cut back to present Wanda and Agatha; Wanda says the bomb was defective, but they were trapped for two days, and Agatha implies it not going off was Wanda’s doing, believing her to be a witch like herself.

They move onto a HYDRA testing chamber, where teenage volunteer-Wanda stands near the sceptre from The Avengers, the one Thanos gave to Loki, the one containing the Mind Stone. She moves toward it, and the sceptre’s blue orb breaks from the handle; floats towards her. She touches it, and it bursts, revealing the yellow Mind Stone inside, and letting out a kind of wind blast. In the light, Wanda sees a silhouette reminiscent of the original Scarlet Witch design.

They take Wanda to isolation, and we watch some scientist replay the tape from the testing chamber, but in the footage, the orb doesn’t move; she moves to the room’s centre, then it cuts to her lying on the ground.

Agatha concludes that the Mind Stone amplified a dormant power, and they move to a memory of the Avengers compound post-Avengers: Age of Ultron. Past-Wanda is grieving for Pietro, Vision enters her room, and she invites him to sit. They discuss the comedy on her TV, then he asks if she wants to talk about her grief, and she describes it as ‘this wave washing over [her], again and again. It knocks [her] down, and when [she tries] to stand up, it just comes for [her] again.’ Vision tries to reassure her, then says the thing that everyone’s been quoting but hit me hard: ‘But what is grief, if not love persevering?’

Agatha asks present-Wanda what happened when there was no-one there to pull her back from the dark, and when Wanda refuses, she presses. They shift into the SWORD compound, where past-Wanda approaches the desk demanding to be given Vision’s body post-Avengers: Endgame. This is the point from the CCTV Hayward showed Monica, Darcy, and Jimmy, claiming Wanda stole Vision’s body.

The receptionist calls somebody, and sends her down the hall, and I can’t help but notice that in her grief, in her hoodie and jeans, her hair is perfectly curled. She goes to Hayward’s office, who takes her into a windowed chamber, beneath which she can see mechanics/engineers doing something to Vision’s body, colour faded and parts broken up. The eyes in his severed head are white, and Wanda is upset, but Hayward questions why she wants to bury him, when she has the power to ‘bring [her] soulmate back online.’ But Wanda says she can’t do it, like when she refused to bring back Sparky, and Hayward tells her his materials are too valuable to just be buried, but offers her the chance to say goodbye. He tells her Vision isn’t hers, and she shatters the glass; lowers herself into the room.

Hayward calls off the guards who raise their guns at her. She lifts her power to his head, where the mind stone was: ‘I can’t feel you,’ reminiscent of the I just feel you, in Avengers: Infinity War, when the Stone bothered him in the night in Scotland. And she leaves, without the body, proving to the audience that Hayward is a liar.

Wanda drives to Westview, real Westview, where she watches the people go about their regular lives, but they seem sad. They all seem sad. She drives to a plot, the outline of a house marked by a concrete foundation, holding a piece of paper from an envelope in the car. She unfolds it to find a plan for the house: To grow old in. -V. Wanda breaks down in what is presumably the plot she turned into their house in the Hex, and her power explodes from her, in huge gusts we’ve never seen. The house forms itself, then it goes further, transforming the town and turning it to monochrome in preparation for WandaVision episode one.

Streams of power turn gold in the air, and form the silhouette of a body, which solidifies into Vision, black and white Vision, dressed in 50s clothes. Wanda remains in colour, in her regular clothes, then she turns to monochrome, to her 50s outfit, and Vision greets her. And despite the seriousness of this scene I can’t get over the damn bullet bra. 

And the pair sit down to watch the television, then the surroundings shift, and we see present-Wanda in her 2000s living room, but in a set, with empty seats for a live audience before her. Agatha claps from them, then vanishes. We hear the twins yell, and Wanda comes outside to find Agatha magically garrotting them, dressed in full-witchy attire.

Agatha describes Wanda as ‘a being capable of spontaneous creation’, calls it chaos magic--’And that makes you the Scarlet Witch.’ I feel like I ought to say roll credits, only that’s not even the name of the show. Before WandaVision’s title was officially announced, I remember seeing speculation that it would simply be called Vision and the Scarlet Witch, like Falcon and the Winter Soldier. 

The credits roll, and, halfway through, we cut to Hayward and SWORD outside the Hex. Hayward goes into a tent, describes all their hard work at something, ‘but all we needed was a little energy directly from the source;’ and we’re shown the missile Wanda dragged out of the Hex in episode 5, glowing red. Someone flips a switch, and we watch lights turn on in a glass chamber, containing Vision, rendered in pure white, who wakes up. Another Vision, made from the original, and yet before this episode, due to the constant thing about twins, people were speculating there were two Wandas. Wrong character, right idea.

This is my favourite episode in the show: it’s magical, and it makes everything make so much more sense. We see that the Hex’s creation was an accident, but Wanda was ‘making it up as [she went] along,’ like the theme song in, I believe, episode 5. I just love origin stories.

Episode Nine: ‘The Series Finale’ This finale was released on March 5th, with a grand total of 49 minutes of runtime, and, epic as it was, I found it to be rather disappointing, following a fairly typical Marvel formula, compared to the originality of the rest of the series. Granted, parts of this episode in particular were shot in 2020, so they didn’t quite go as planned, but still. The CGI is excellent though.

We open to exactly where we left off; Wanda frees the twins and sends them inside, then sends a blast at Agatha, who absorbs it-- ‘I take power from the undeserving. It’s kinda my thing’--and Wanda’s hand begins to blacken. Agatha offers her Westview in return for her magic, which Wanda obviously doesn’t accept. White Vision lands behind her, and she goes to him, confused. He places his hands on her face, but presses, trying to crack her skull, and it becomes clear he is doing Hayward’s bidding.

In sweeps Wanda’s Westview-Vision (who we’ll call Red Vision) and blasts White Vision away. The two swoop off together for their own fight, Wanda flies after Agatha, and we see Monica locked in a messy living room with Fietro, where she has presumably been since the end of episode 7.

The Visions fight each other, in that classic Marvel way of pitting the hero against a villain with an identical skillset (I’m looking at you, Iron Man, The Incredible Hulk, and basically every other movie. Seriously, Marvel needs to make more villains like Loki, instead of introducing them at the start of a film and having them somehow taken out of the equation by the end). It’s a cool sequence, as they phase through each other and plummet up and down. I love flying sequences.

At SWORD, Jimmy calls out Hayward, saying he won’t be able to cover this out, but Hayward says Wanda stopped her show, so there’s no evidence, and there’ll only be one Vision by the end, who people will assume Wanda resurrected. But Jimmy says he has called some friends from Quantico--whatever that is--to expose Hayward, who handcuffs him, but Jimmy is a magician, so he frees himself and actually calls somebody to apprehend Hayward.

Wanda arrives in the town square, to no sign of Agatha, and is then blasted to the ground by her from behind. Agatha summons a book we saw in her basement: ‘The Scarlet Witch is not born, she is formed. She has no coven, no need for incantation. [Her] power exceeds that of the Sorcerer Supreme’--Doctor Strange--’It’s [her] destiny to destroy the world.’ But Wanda denies that she is a witch. Agatha casts a spell on Dottie from episode 2, apparently bringing her back to consciousness. She tells Wanda her name is Sarah, and begs her to let her bring her daughter out of her room. Wanda accuses Agatha, who replies, ‘She’s your meat puppet. I just cut her strings.’ I just love that line, for some reason.

Agatha casts another spell, and everyone in the square returns to their senses, approaches and surrounds Wanda. 

Monica finds a document in the room with Fietro, that says his name is Ralph Bohner. This was incredibly unsatisfying to me--it’s interesting that Fietro is actually the Ralph Agnes constantly mentioned, but nothing else comes of this, and, as of the end of the series, Pietro and his changed face are simply an elaborate boner joke. I wish his face had some kind of relevance as of now, but it may become relevant in Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness, because that’s obviously where we’re really going to delve into the multiverse, and it features Wanda, so it would make sense.

Monica pins down Ralph and tears a string of beads from his neck, which glowed purple; the thing allowing Agatha to control him.

In the twins’ room, Billy has a vision (heh) of what is happening with Wanda, and they run outside.

The people around Wanda bombard her with their real stories, their real problems. ‘When you let us sleep, we have your nightmares.’ She yells that she’s kept these people safe, but they beg to be freed, and the noise builds, until Wanda screams, with a burst of power that toes ropes around their necks, suffocating them, but she stops it. Mrs Hart begs her, ‘If you won’t let us go, just let us die.’ Agatha taunts her that heroes don’t torture people, and she sends out a blast of power, that highlights the Hex’s border crimson, and it begins to break apart. She tells them all to leave now.

His white counterpart blasts Red vision to the ground, near Wanda but he begins to break apart. The twins arrive, and begin to break apart, tied to the Hex. It looks weirdly like a LEGO advert, but Wanda recloses to Hex to save them. You know, what? I’m still not sure why it’s hexagonal. I wouldn’t question it being round, or quadrilateral, but hexagonal seems too intentional.

Agatha blasts the family with magic, and Wanda shields them, but Agatha absorbs the power. SWORD vehicles roll into the square, hayward in one, having apparently managed to cross the border before Wanda closed it again. White Vision rolls into the scene and slams Red Vision through the walls of and into a library, and Red stops White attacking him by explaining that he is not the true Vision, because he’s just Wanda’s version.

Wanda flies up, again after Agatha, while the twins use their powers to take away SWORD’s guns, and Hayward comes out with a pistol, which he fires at them, but Monica, having freed herself from Ralph, blocks the bullets. They ripple through her body, and pass through, but fall to the ground as her eyes glow orange. As Hayward drives back, then revs up to apparently run them over, Darcy, in the circus van, slams his vehicle into the side of a building.

We cut to the Vision’s pondering the Ship of Theseus--a philosophical thought experiment. If the Ship of Theseus has one of its planks replaced, it remains the Ship of Theseus. But, if all the planks are replaced over time, is it still the same ship? And what if the old planks are reassembled into another ship; which is then the true ship? This is a metaphor for the two Vision’s--White being the reassembly of the old planks, and Red being the replaced.

Red Vision proposes that the true ship is the one touched by Theseus himself, with the wear and tear, suggesting White Vision is the true one, because he has the memories Red doesn’t; the one touched by Wanda. White Vision claims he does not have the memories, but Red tells him his data banks are not so easily wiped--they’re there, just withheld. White allows Red to do his zappy thing, and the memories of everything Vision went through pre-WandaVision comes back to him. White says he is the true Vision, and flies away through the roof.

Meanwhile, Wanda sneaks up behind Agnes and does the nightmare-mind thing she did to the Avengers at the beginning of Avengers: Age of Ultron, sending her mind to the stake at the opening of episode 8. The desiccated witches rise, but instead turn on Wanda, calling her a witch, again, and again. The witches wrest Wanda onto the stake instead, but a red crown, like the blue on Agatha’s mother in episode 8, materialises on her head, formed of the same light as her magic. It’s really jarring at this point that she’s still in a hoodie and sweatpants.

Wanda blasts away the other witches, and they emerge from the nightmare, back to Westview. She and Agatha rise, blast magic at one another, and Wanda’s hands blacken further as Agatha absorbs more and more. She sends a blast at one of Westview’s walls, and a spot ripples in the middle of each. 

Wanda’s face seems to age, like the witches of Agatha’s coven, and Agatha absorbs streams of magic, until Wanda has none left. She gives her some depressing lecture, then tries to blast Wanda out of the sky, but it doesn’t work. Her hands begin to blacken, and Wanda’s face youthens, then the camera pans to reveal runes on Westview’s walls, like those in the basement, now disabling Agatha’s magic. Little confused how Wanda stayed flying when Agatha took her power, and how Agatha now stays flying.

The red crown reappears on Wanda’s head, her eyes glow, she reabsorbs her power from Agatha, and, as she does, she changes. Her hair comes down, and she becomes the silhouette she saw in the Mind Stone at HYDRA, finally getting a Scarlet Witch costume, and it is epic. 

They return to the ground, and Wanda uses her powers to put Agatha under the control she had the other residents under, to turn her into the Nosy Neighbour once and for all. Wanda leaves Agatha alive, so she could return in future instalments,.

Wanda, Red Vision, and the twins return to their home, and the Hex’s border contracts, until it covers only their street. They put the boys to bed, and Vision begins, ‘Your mother and I...’, and, when I first watched this, I really thought he was going to say ‘...are getting a divorce,’ but he simply finishes, ‘...are very proud of you both.’

Wanda says that ‘a family is forever,’ clearly already in mourning for the children she’s about to lose. They finish up, the border continues contracting, and Wanda turns off the lamps in the living room, though Vision turns one on, to say goodbye. As the border progresses towards them, Vision asks what he is, and says some literal and romantic crap; they kiss, talk a little, and he breaks apart as the border reaches them, and the house returns to the empty plot it once was.

Wanda is left standing exactly how she was before she formed the Hex, same hair, same clothes, puts up her hood, and walks into town. where the people glare as she approaches Monica, who says, ‘They’ll never know what you sacrificed for them.’  They have a classic series-wrap-up conversation, then Wanda shifts into her Scarlet Witch outfit, and flies away.

Mid-credits scene; we see Jimmy just after the debrief, Hayward is put in handcuffs, and Monica is called into the theatre, where she meets someone wearing a police badge, who shifts into a skrull. The skrull says a friend of Monica’s mother’s would like to meet with her, presumably Talos, and when Monica asks where, she just points up. 

And an end-credits scene opens in a pan shot, zooming to a cabin by a lake in the woods, where Wanda, dressed in sweats, sits on the porch with a mug. We follow her inside as the kettle whistles, but the camera continues into the bedroom, where her astral form sits, dressed as the Scarlet Witch, with the Darkhold, the book Agatha had. When we see Doctor Strange astral-project, his body falls unconscious, and this truly proves the Scarlet Witch is more powerful than the Sorcerer Supreme, as aforementioned.

This series really solidified my love for Wanda and Vision--Wanda, who I liked before, but mostly because of her powers than her character, which lacked development, and Vision, who I kinda hated because of his moral-high-ground bullshit, but who I now love--brought back fan favourites Darcy Lewis and Jimmy Woo, and set up Monica’s future plotlines. In truth, I liked Agatha better before she went full-witch mode, but she was an enjoyable villain. Hayward, on the other hand, was someone easy to hate, but not to such a level it was fun to hate him.

Every episode kept me on my feet, and every week I screamed I couldn’t wait for another. Part of my love for this was because we’d had no MCU content since July 2019, with Spider-Man: Far From Home, but it was just such excellent storytelling. Though the climax was a little disappointing, it was still more entertaining than most action sequences, where things happen so quickly I just zone out, and the visuals were incredible. I loved the sitcoms, and the differentiation at the end. Episode 4 was the perfect time to finally give us some form of explanation.

Basically, watch this damn show. Though I’d be surprised if you got this far without watching it. Watch it, make everyone else watch it, and, writers, take notes. The best stories are the ones with excellent characters and an excellent plot, and WandaVision mastered it.

[zydrateacademy]

Current Activities in Gaming #222 (and life in general)

Do I even have anyone left to read my stuff? Alright, I’m gonna be real here. There’s a few variables that led to my inactivity on Tumblr. Let’s break down a few. 1) It’s not as fun. And not just because nudity was removed, though let’s be honest that’s certainly a variable. Ever since the Tumblr company shuffling of leadership there’s been a few choice updates that just don’t lend well towards the community. My activity feed is mostly just memes at this point. Also, I love blogging but I’ve yet to find a different platform to do so on, but I’ll be sure to google some alternatives soon enough.

2) I’d rather just be playing. These bigger CA posts typically take an hour or two to write up. I don’t plan them, I just open the post up and let my thoughts just get dumped. An hour or two is a lot of time, and that’s plenty of time to make some headway in certain games. Maybe pausing during an MMO during a dungeon queue or a raid party reset, but I don’t think I’ve touched an MMO in a couple of years so that window has closed.  As a 2a, you could also just say I just very simply haven’t been in the mood to dedicate an hour or two every couple of days.

3) Schedule switchup and fatigue. A few months ago I transferred out of front end at the grocery store I work at, and into the produce department. There was more than one chance. For one, I no longer work morning shifts (often was 7am to 1pm or noonish). That’s 5-6 hour shifts and that gives me my day to play around with. However the produce department needed a closer, so now I’m up to 8.5 hour shifts, typically 1:30 to 10pm (EST, in case that matters). I was getting 40 hours a week but I asked my boss to downgrade me to 32 instead, which is still a few more than what I was getting on front end in addition to a raise, because front end is typically the “bottom” of the retail totem pole for some reason, despite them being pretty damn important to customer experience. Regardless, at the end of almost 9 hours, I typically just come home, turn on an ASMR video on my second monitor and basically shut my brain and body down as I mindlessly plug away at whatever game I’m playing. And yes, apparently I’m ‘essential’. So I’m still working during the pandemic.

Now then. Let’s get to what I’ve been up to, and none of this is in any particular order since I’ve last posted. I must have hopped to two or three different Conan Exiles servers while ultimately settling on Oasis of Pleasure, a very ERP driven place. I spend a good month or two being active and then I just gotta wait for the next server reset and let my personal CE batteries recharge.

I’ve gotten back into Skyrim, and I really should do some scrolling to find my last CA number for that. I’ve more than doubled my hours on the special edition, and apparently it’s been just under four years since I touched it last. Right now I’m playing a sort of nonlethal thief. The Ordinator perk overhaul (which is a must have, honestly) gives the light armor tree some big bonuses to hand to hand and makes it incredibly viable even in higher difficulties. She keeps a bow and knife around for “monsters” but ultimately uses her fists against most humanoids. I’ve been trying something different during the thieves guild questline: Actually sneaking by everyone and not murdering the fuck out of every humanoid you run into. Which is an option, fun enough. You can fail the radiant quests by murdering the homeowners but most of the questline is filled with mercenaries and you can’t really ‘fail’ the main missions (though I wonder what happens if you kill that argonian?) otherwise players could block a shit load of content from themselves.

I’ve also played a hot barbarian werewolf girl, some kind of Nazgul looking woman, and some other stuff.

Hilariously I’ve yet to get a decent screenshot of my current nonlethal thief. Her kit is pretty damn basic, wearing a custom set of the guildmaster armor with the black bandoleers. Honestly she looks pretty unassuming, which is kind of the purpose. Maybe I’ll go take her hood off and get a screenshot. Some day.

After that, I will say I’ve done some preorders. I still await Bloodlines 2 and Cyberpunk 2077. Delays notwithstanding, last time I checked they’re being released at roughly the same timeframe. I also preordered Horizon Zero Dawn which I am enjoying but must admit that some elements of it are a tad underwhelming. Maybe it’s because I played a good chunk of AC:Odyssey again recently, but I grow tired of the random garbage pickup game for basic crafting. Games just can’t really stand on their own two legs anymore, and open world games seem to be stuck on a few trends they can’t shake. Running around mining for ore and picking at tree branches is not fun. It’s a side effect of HZD indeed being four years old already, but I’ll still probably get a good few dozen hours on it. Not sure if I’ll bother beating it, but I do like Aloy and her story, though I’ve been treated with some spoilers since its release so I kind of know where it’s headed. After that... Let’s check my ‘recent’ list on Steam.

So we got some Town of Salem, which has become my go-to night closer before bed most nights. Last time I made a post on it I probably only had 10-20 hours played, of which I now have over 200. I’m sure as hell a lot better than I used to be, but the All Any gamemodes still manage to make my headspin, but they lead to some hilarious moments. All other modes makes it very difficult because of the “no claim space” meta, so I like hitting AA so I can claim whatever the hell I want. I’ve wanted to get back into Dying Light but it does something dirty to my computer that always demands a hard restart. You basically can’t tab away at all, even in borderless mode. And when I try exiting, I can no longer click any tabs. So hard power button it is. It’s such a good game and it feels really good to play, but I just can’t let it force me to do hard restarts anymore. I’ve dabbled into many others and some aren’t worth mentioning too much. We got Star Wars Battlefront 2, which I was approaching with some level of skill. I like the Co-Op modes but it feels like there’s only like three maps for that. Was fun with my brother for a while but that mode needs like ten new maps. But I believe development has stopped (a while ago, too), as the team is probably working on the next thing. I’ve already posted my dealings with the likes of Mount and Blade 2: Bannerlord and Generation Zero. I never got around to beating GZ’s Alpine expansion. I got my 40 hours of it and frankly... that was enough. Good game, just lacks some depth. Some reviewers mentioned that the loop became too shallow and I can kind of agree, even though it took me 40 hours to get to that point.  As for MNB, I’m sort of waiting on the more final phases of its early access. It’s basically getting patched every since week and I had trouble keeping up with all the mod downloads. So I’m thinking of doing a full uninstall (mods and all) and waiting longer down the development line. Maybe with workshop support, playing and updating will be more stable. That’s about the last I have within the last few months. I’ll probably get around to finding my last Skyrim post and pick up from where I left off.

[bekahdoesnerdshit]

for the 100 warm up questions, pick or random: 8, 28, 32, 84?

I’m going to pick them....just because I had Really good answers for some of these for specific characters Edit from about 2/3 of the way through answering this: Okay it turned into the Raini and Cog show but what the fuck are you gonna do about it. Unfollow me? I HAVE to laugh

8. What location encountered in the campaign has your character felt the most “at home” in, or just generally liked the most? Okay I know this is a weird pull but I said it in game and I do mean it: Raini fucking vibed with that drow city. Please don’t make small talk with me! Our business is transactional and then we’re done! If someone tries to stab you in the back you kill them! That all checks out to me! You power word kill the first guy who tries to pickpocket you and then you’re golden. An Ideal World. But also I am thinking about......the ache of nostalgia you don’t know why you’re feeling when you go into a room you’ve been told is yours, in a state of disarray that makes it look like the owner only just stepped out a minute ago, and trying to the emptiness and simultaneous longing you feel as you run your hand along a comforter you think looks nice but can’t remember picking out....... also to scoop us up out of that angst trench I am thinking about Raini sleeping way better than usual on Ecstasy’s ship with the gentle rocking turbulence the comes with flying....very sweet to me....

Also want to talk briefly about how sad I got thinking about this question for Cog because....like, nowhere? Her hometown: sucks ass. Definitely not home. New Alexandria: pretty okay, but way too urban for Cog to really vibe with it. The Crossroads: holy shit, there’s so much going on. Maybe she would have felt more at home if they hadn’t been in the middle of a coup when the party showed up, but... 

28. What is currently motivating your character to stay with the party? Brilliance has the most concrete but boring answer: it’s because she’s a good person and feels Responsible since she convinced the party to go to Hell in the first place. But that’s lame so we’re gonna talk about somebody else too.

I want to talk about Cog. Can I talk about Cog? I want to talk about Cog!! She’s staying with her party a) because she’s a sweetheart and they’re her friends obviously but also she is Completely convinced that they need her. Conversations I as a player have heard between other characters show that they do not see it the same way, but Cog fully believes that they need her as a moral compass. No one should have to say, “Hey, don’t combine Geas and Sending to try and get this person to do what you want from several miles away! You know she won’t listen and you know that’ll kill her” but Apparently someone does have to! And apparently it has to be Cog. idk if the post has worked its way out of my impossibly long queue yet, but there’s a post where I said “Cog is the moral compass and impulse control of several powerful people” and THAT’S why she needs to stay with her party. 

32. What is your character the most insecure about? Raini very easy very sad: she feels Super insecure about her decision to take everyone’s memories, and I think it stems from a combination of things. First of all, she’s frustrated with herself for not being smart enough to think of a better solution. There had to have been another option! If she felt like she had to resort to using Wish, why didn’t she just Wish to kill Geryon? Or defeat the thing in the Abyss? There must have been context she doesn’t have now, but not knowing it and thus not being able to understand her own thought process is So frustrating. The other big thing is I think she genuinely cannot imagine being in a position where the rest of the party trusted her to make that unilateral decision, and so she assumes there’s a significant amount of unspoken resentment toward her from the people around her. I don’t know if they did or not! But Raini definitely knows she’s not in that position now, and knows enough at this point about the kind of person she is that she’s convinced herself the same was true before. The reveal came about when we were kinda busy with some shit, the party didn’t have a chance to sit down and talk about how they felt about what happened! They didn’t immediately flip out, which is great, but that doesn’t mean they’re not angry and just sitting on it until they have their memories back. I think Raini wouldn’t care as much if they were mad if she was 100% convinced that she did the right thing, but that ties again into the first point because she’s not sure she did the right thing. So, ehh, it’s rough a little bit maybe. 

84. What does your character want to be remembered by? Here’s some deep Raini lore idk if I’ve talked about with anyone other than you, Morgan: pre-wipe (and probably pre a Lot of adventuring) Raini’s ultimate goal was to become a god. A minor deity for sure, but. She wanted to ascend! She wanted to stop being mortal! She’s a high level wizard and an angel and she kicks ass; how hard would it be to take that next step from god-like to demigod? That was the goal she had in mind from level one when she set out adventuring, but....I think it honestly maybe sort of lost it’s luster over time? It’s easy to let those kind of long term goals kinda...fall by the wayside, when you’re busy fighting monsters and adventuring. It’s easy to forget that kind of stuff when you’re happy too busy to have the free time to scheme. Maybe it’s okay to focus on the now, on the people you’re with, on the dumbass jokes they keep telling, on ducking out of the way of the pillows they keep throwing at you. 

GONNA talk about Cog again too: She wants to be remembered by the mark she leaves on the world. She wants to be known for having been a force of good in a pretty bleak wasteland, and for having shared the idea that kindness is a discipline, not a character trait. She doesn’t want to be remembered as the vector for some long dead god to return to the world, because that’s not who she is. Not only is that not true, she wants to be known for what she did, not what she was “born” as.  Fuck also now I’m thinking about how half the party are elves/half-elves and how vasty they’re going to outlive her, and how Cog would say something about wanting them to carry forward her conviction about the importance of choosing to be kind even when it’s hard, and grieving party members trying to respect her memory and do that while hating how unfair it is that she’s not there to continue spreading it herself.....maybe I am emo at two in the morning......

[rottenwoodandwiltedsunflowers]

Waffle and Kae Joint Recap 8/16

Hello Tumblr! We still exist! Children are hard for free time...amiright? GET READY FOR AN ACTUAL RECAP!

Waffle So we both decided that life was far too hard at the moment and it was time to give our child to the wolves for the weekend and run to NYC. (Not really, we dropped her with Gramma and Grandpa and came to down to see Noirtown) As long as we were sneaking away, why not stop by the McKittrick. We flew in Friday afternoon and had a drink at Gallow Green before heading down to queue up. There was a surprise happy hour in the Manderley so we were let in early which is always a pleasant surprise. We found some friends inside to pass the time with before the first elevator was eventually called. I have to say what an adorable and charming pair Elizabeth and Joseph make in the bar. They have great chemistry and are just a joy to watch.

Once inside, I headed to the ballroom which was in mid-scene. It was actually the only ballroom I would see in my 2 shows. Jenna’s Sexy witch did a great job of sucking me in with her creepy and seductive eye contact. I wasn’t sure where I was going to go but by the end of the ballroom, the glances and smirks had me hooked. I followed her up and got a Banquo couch duet all to myself. Jenna’s dancing is next level! This dance easily ranks in my top McKittrick dances. She quickly and gracefully disappeared behind the couch. The dance is breathtaking when done well and Jenna seemed to float through the air at every lift. When she was coming down from the bookshelf for the final kiss, she planted her foot on the couch in a way that was strong and invoked thoughts of a wild animal pouncing on her prey. She still clearly commanded the scene and Jack’s Banquo looked dopey and fooled until the final kiss.

The crowds have certainly gotten bolder and pushier the last few years. I would wager that some of it is what I refer to as the Shanghai effect. The cultural norms in Shanghai are much different than in New York. Personal space and following distances are much closer and fan culture is much more intense. The crowds certainly seem more aggressive then I remember years ago. Two shorter girls pushed in front of me when we all entered Agnes’ apartment and to be honest, I am years past the stage where I will push back at all or even stand my ground aggressively. The performers recognize people and know who is around most of the time. Sometimes that results in those people getting a 1:1 and sometimes it doesn’t. Either way, I am not in a place where I need a 1:1 to feel good about my show.

Jenna reached between the 2 and grabbed my hand to pull me in. The first half of the 1:1 was great but we hit a snag when we had a set malfunction which resulted in her not being able to open the proper door to exit Agnes’ apartment. It wasn’t for lack of trying! She gave me the jellybean before taking my hand and escorting me out to the entryway and back to High street. We watched Pil’s Fulton through the window for a while before he pulled open the door to the autopsy room. I wish I could have seen his face when there was no sexy witch waiting for him. She waited until he came back into the main office before forcefully pushing the door open and standing menacingly in the doorway. She backed Fulton up into the bookshelf behind his desk and proceeded to harass him. She retrieved what she needed then tossed Fulton onto High Street. Jenna’s bartop solo was also great like literally everything she does. 

I didn’t feel like seeing the banquet so I headed up to 5. I love me a matron. I really love me a matron that is able to surprise me. I was delighted to find Ginger Kearns’ matron. The matron played a fun little game where she brought out a hand mirror and used it to watch me as I watched her. I love new, weird matron shit! I also love watching how people come and go. It’s oddly comforting watching other guests and pattens in the hotel. How there can be a mob of people and when you look up 30 seconds later, you are alone in a forest. 

Tori’s Hecate is a powerhouse. She still unnerves me. She is in control of every moment that happens in the rep bar. She has a signature look she gives Agnes when she comes in looking for help. She smirks, quirks her eyebrow, and leans back in her chair sizing Agnes up. This Hecate is playing the long game and she is having the best time doing it.

I was very disappointed to find there were no red licorice bites in Paisley’s Sweet Shop. I begrudgingly settled for a fruit slice. 

The other standout of the show for me was Doug’s Speakeasy. I like my speakeasy one of two ways...either a total jerk or fun and carefree. I want a puppy who either pisses in your shoe every time you come home 5 minutes late or I want the bestest boy ever! I used to call Nick Dillenburg Toolbox Speakeasy because his speakeasy was like a toolbag except also, the whole damn toolbox. I loved it. Doug’s speakeasy is mischievous and funny and adorable. He is a good boy. A loyal servant and a fun speakeasy. He did the most delightful little dance I have seen in ages during his downtime. I LOVED IT!!! He leaned back over his bar and did a little flip/roll to the other side at the start of it. Utterly charming! He also gets points for his cute little tap like dance on the pool table. 

Once again, I hung back when it was time to do the shot game but he summoned me forward. I love watching the different variations on the game from performer to performer. He started with the 3 shots before laying out the cards face down. He made a show of flipping them until all the red Kings were facing up and only one card closest to us remained hidden. When he flipped it, it was a black King. He shuffled the cards before smirking and crouching down to continue shuffling while making noises consistent to hacking up a lung, presumably on said cards. I couldn’t help but laugh out loud at the ridiculous/disgusting nature of it. He came up and we all drew cards. The first person revealed a red King. Doug held out the shot and just before the person could reach it, he sent it flying over his shoulder into the wall behind him. The second person revealed a red King. Doug once again held out the shot and as the person reached for it, he slowly poured it out over the edge of the bar (probably on the white masks shoes). I revealed a red King. He held out the glass and as I reached for it, he drank it himself. 

At this point, he pulled out the box with the whiskey shot. He slowly opened the top and took a big sniff of the contents. We were then invited to do the same. Round two. He narrowed it down to 2 red Kings and the black King. He reshuffled, complete with crouching and coughing. We all drew a card and when we turned them over, the man in the middle had won. He took his shot. Doug took a moment to stare at us all before reaching in and pulling out another shot of whiskey. He then reshuffled and dealt again. We turned over our cards a second time and the same white mask had won again. One game, two shots. Poor dude looked a bit ill by the end of it! We shook hands and the story moved on.

I spent a good amount of time in the bar this show because Elizabeth Lindsay is my absolute favorite. I considered going back in for the finale but in the end, decided that I was having far too much fun chatting which is a new thing for me. I wanted to close out my bar tab before the rush anyway because we had tickets to Bartchland Follies after the show. Would recommend! KaeLyn Hello, weirdos. It’s been a minute, both since we’ve been to the Hotel and since we’ve posted anything remotely resembling a recap. In fact, the formulaic recap era of SNM itself may have passed, as it seems fewer and fewer fandom posts about the show itself are being posted to the hashtag. 

Also, I feel compelled to drop an explainer that we have some questions piled up in our inbox and I just want to say that we do see them and appreciate them, even if we don’t reply. Most likely if we haven't replied it’s because someone else either gets to them first (if, as it often seems, anons are sending those same questions to several old SNM tumblrs at once) or we just don’t see them for a long time because we don’t log in as much and it seems silly by the time we read them. Of course, sometimes we’re just not going to answer on principle (spoilers, rude, etc.). We are still here, queer, going to shows every few months when we can ditch our toddler for a weekend. You’re also likely to catch us at Mayfair or Halloween (Inferno VI? lol). Anyway, our flight home is delayed and we thought it’d be fun to attempt recaps while we were waiting. I imagine mine will come first because I have less to report and, well, Waffle’s recaps have always been more detailed than mine! On Friday, we checked into our hotel and set out to get a leisurely dinner at Ovest, always a good start to a long night in the Hotel. We arrived to the McKittrick around 6:00 PM for a quick drink at Gallow Green, then queued up at 6:30 PM, which I thought was aggressively too early for a 7:30 show, but lucky us–there was a happy hour! Apparently, a thing that’s happening on weekdays? So we were among the first to arrive at the bar, where we unexpectedly ran into some friendly faces from the fandom. One had snagged the corner booth already with some friends. The childfree weekend was off to a great start! It was only made better when Elizabeth (Virginia) showed up and surprised Waffle with a shoulder squeeze.

I rarely full loop these days. Especially after I passed the 100 show mark earlier this year, I have a very chill relationship with Sleep No More. I still look forward to each return, but each show is a slower burn for me and you won’t catch me running up and down the stairs. More often than not, I end up in the bar before the finale. It’s like catching up with an old friend. I find out what’s new. I reminisce on some favorite stories. I settle into a familiar pattern.

This particular night, I started at the ballroom because FOMO-motivated habits are hard to break. The night was kind of a greatest hits list, honestly, and I wish I could tell you I spent time with people I hadn’t watched before or picked up some stuff I hadn’t yet seen (like Doug’s speakeasy), but that’s not what happened. I stayed to watch Stephanie C’s bald witch (f*ck yes) and popped up to catch Nate’s boy witch at the phone booths on his way up to the pool table dance. (Maybe it’s my particular age showing, but Nate looks more like a member of a pop punk band that I definitely saw at Warped Tour in the late 90’s than Draco Malfoy to me. Either way, it works!) 

So, I haven’t been lately and I just have to say that the Nick-Jenna-Stephanie witch trio is A+. Best witch coven energy I’ve seen in a while!I caught the first rave, standing near Tori’s Hecate to catch a bit of everyone’s performance (while the crowd was still light enough that I could also see the prophecy even at a distance). I popped up to five for a bit, which was obviously recently cleaned and freshened up. I actually did a full loop ballroom-to-ballroom with Parker’s porter. Then, I came out to the bar for a drink and chatted with folks out there for the duration of the show.

It was a standard McKittrick re-entry show for me, after a few months away, an all-around solid cast and show. We slid out at the end of the night to go up for the Bartschland Follies (which was superb and sexy and silly and so rad and fun and also had far more straight people who looked slightly scandalized front-and-center in the audience than I anticipated).

[kotsume]

hi i’m back from the dead (tumblr gave me my blog back)

hi i said i’d post this tomorrow but i lied and couldn’t help myself.

first off, happy 2019!! it’s been nearly a year since i’ve seen y’all!!! how are you guys? i just wanted to say thank you to everyone who supported me and i am so thankful for you all.

i have a full explanation under the cut and i would really appreciate it if y’all read it!!

also, i think i’ll reblog this a couple times sorry ik it’s annoying

now, a lot of people i talked to/talked about me kept thinking i was terminated. to be clear, @kaijohs was not terminated, but suspended. they are 2 differnet things as there’s actually a spot in support for terminated blogs :)

i could log into tumblr and go on my dash, check out my activity and drafts, but could not like/reblog, add to drafts/queue, edit drafts, view my inbox. this only happened to @kaijohs, all my other sideblogs (like @fyeahvioletevergarden​) functioned normally and i could still do everything i normally would on them.

for some idiotic reason, tumblr still let me create new sideblogs ????????????? it doesn’t really make sense because that’s the reason why i was suspended in the first place but okay tumblr you do you i guess.

okay so:

i had saved, unused urls. those urls consisted of my old ones and my future urls. i tend to change my url every couple of months or so. anyone who’s been following me from the very beginning can tell you that i had a url change about 6 times over the course of 2 years. so yeah, it is safe to say i’m an indecisive girl who can’t stick to one url (but i think i’ll stick with kaijohs bc i love it).

tumblr must have done some random search bc you can’t report it? i didn’t see an option for it, so feel free to correct me and show me if i am wrong. anyways, i ended up getting suspended over it even though i was keeping most, if not all, of them updated. there are many users on tumblr with hundreds of urls, selling them for money, and i got suspended bc i was unlucky. not much i could do about that.

i am NOT saying i didn’t deserve it bc it was my fault for breaking the rules, but i deleted the urls as soon as i read the email and was STILL suspended for 11 months (february 27 2018 - january 22 2019). verbatim, tumblr said “Let us know when that’s been done so we can restore your access.” i sent them at least 2 emails every week through support in the first few months, as well as replying to the original email they sent me. it didn’t really do much. one time they decided to responded to my email (not one of those automated “support request received” emails, but an actual follow-up email), they completely missed the mark.

imo 11 months was overkill.

i don’t know if they actually read the things people send in support, but i have a feeling they don’t (it’s probably just bots tbh) because no human with a job is dumb enough to respond like that if they read the original request.

–

i thought a lot about starting over from scratch and making a new blog because i honestly did not know if i would ever get @kaijohs back. i’m just so happy it’s back now ^^

–

so what exactly happened during my suspension? i…

- turned 18 !!! - became a stressed out university student (major: biomedical sciences) - made many gifs to post - lost my queue* - read lots of manga - watched a lot of anime - went to europe for 3 weeks >>> france, italy, and england - lost 1.5k+ followers on @kaijohs (rip nearly 34k) - found lots of people reposting/copying my gifs :) - cut off my long ass hair wooo - distanced myself from tumblr for the time being - found someone i want to spend the rest of my life with

*i had ~100 queued items and posts just disappeared in groups idk where they went nor do i have an explanation for what happened except that tumblr deletes posts in your queue when you’re suspended.

–

oh yeah here’s a funny story: i tried calling a (false) tumblr support number but it turned out to be a scammer, and when i asked the person on the other end of the line if this was a scam. the guy told me to press the windows key and R, which raised flags for me. then he yelled at me, telling me to do my research before i accuse him of scamming me because apparently i “didn’t know anything”. i didn’t need to do research when i had Common Sense *insert that rainbow spongebob meme* backing me up… why would i need to run a new program in order for him to unsuspend me on tumblr? then he hung up after lashing out on me.

–

i will be posting a lot of darling in the franxx gifs btw. sorry woops zero two is still the best girl ever

also, as much as i am happy to have my blog back, i’m a little concerned with how i’m going to manage school + my life + gifmaking. i really do miss it, but i get easily stressed and overwhelmed, but i hope i can work something out because i want to continue doing what i love!! 

–

if you’ve made it this far and actually read all this shit, ilysm, you’re amazing, and have a wonderful day~

[arabellaflynn]

First things first, a bit of administrivia: Those of you who have been around for a while may remember that I run an "advent calendar" for the month of December. The winter holidays are two solid months with a heavy emphasis on belonging and family. I have a lot of things to say about those concepts, most of which are not what anyone wants to hear while they're wrapping presents and roasting turkeys. I queue up a bunch of fun things instead and hole up to drink until January. This year I'm doing things a little differently. While the advent calendar will be running on the public blog -- this year it's folk tales from around the world -- the regular blog entries will be running on my Patreon for anyone who cares to pledge $1 or more. Because I'm sometimes rubbish at posting on a regular schedule, my Patreon runs on a monthly model, rather than per-piece, so if you pledge $1, you'll never be charged more than that. You are, of course, welcome to give me as much money as you want. I appreciate that. Or stuff. I've been eyeing an adjustable dress form that I cannot even remotely afford, so that I can stop draping patterns on myself in the mirror. This is particularly important because the shiny new job I got turns out to not be very shiny after all. The actual job is pretty cool; it's with one of those outfits that runs murder mystery parties, among other things. Events are pretty much an evening of herding cats, possibly drunk cats, around and work out to about $15 an hour, which is fine for a part-time gig. There are, however, a number of problems with this. One is that rehearsals are unpaid. That's normal, to the point where producers will write !!!!PAID REHEARSALS!!!! in the ad if it's the case, and there's only one before an assigned show, but they're up in Malden. Ordinarily I could get up there and back in the Boston Standard Commuting Hour, but right now the MBTA is taking the Orange Line to bits, which means it takes me up to two. In both directions. Three-plus hours of commute for a single 90 minute meeting is right around where I start squawking, regardless of whether the T is your fault. I am responsible for my own costuming. Again, not normally an issue; there is an awful lot of random crap in my closet. The issue is that these guys do not assign consistent roles. They have ten different shows, each with 4-10 parts (of varying genders) I might potentially be assigned to play at any given time. I'd have to go and buy one or more pieces, without reimbursement, on 1-3 weeks' notice, for at least 50% of these. There is no way to request a specific role when marking oneself available for a show, if you even know what show it is when you sign up. Which you don't always, depending on how indecisive the client was when booking. The most egregious problem, however, is the literal lengths they expect me to go to work those $15/hr shows. They asked me if I was available for travel when I was hired. I thought 'oh that's fine, I can go to Rhode Island sometimes'. No. They do bookings all over New England, and they do not pay for rail tickets. They expected me to carpool with my fellow actors to Connecticut, for base pay. If you bumped that an order of magnitude, and we are good enough friends that the road trip would be fun by itself, I'd consider going to CT for a show. I don't even know most of these people, so if they really wanted me there, they'd have to go up two orders and shell out for Amtrak. [I later got an email asking if anyone would be willing to help out a sister troupe by driving down to Baltimore "tonight or tomorrow morning". That is a solid eight hours from where I am. I laughed as I deleted this message. Also the one asking who wanted to do an overnight in Maine.] It struck me as mildly sketchy when they insisted I sign up for the Facebook group, on the basis that most of the communication took place there. It's not unheard of, especially if the company skews young, but that's the first time I've run into it from an outfit that actually has a professionally-assembled corporate portal site, complete with news and scheduling software. My suspicions have been proven entirely correct. While there is the occasional 'we booked more shows! go check the company page!' message, 90% of the traffic on the group consists of people posting selfies in costume, cheering about having done yet another show, a.k.a., their normal goddamn job. I have made it very clear that I am not interested in drinking the Kool-Aid, and they are consequently not calling me back even for the local shows. So the job search continues. I had good luck asking my readers for work-at-home positions last time; I landed at Nokia Maps as a geographical researcher and stayed there until they were sold to someone else. Anyone got any leads? In more pleasant news, I am apparently getting more rats. A friend of mine has two out of three squishy boys who get along with people and each other, but not really other rats. He's going to play musical cages with some new ratlings to get a mischief that doesn't chew on each other (much), and the grumpy pair will come to me for cuddles and spoiling. So I will (theoretically, I hope, if nothing goes wrong) have a proper Ratmas this year, if not Ratsgiving. Critter accessories list on Amazon here. Yay. from Blogger https://ift.tt/33QvbUo via IFTTT -------------------- Enjoy my writing? Consider becoming a Patron, subscribing via Kindle, or just toss a little something in my tip jar. Thanks!

[eccentriccowboy]

Assassin// pt. 3

Synopsis: Luke confronts his target with the help of y/n and her secret weapon.

Can you tell I’m not good at synopsis’?? that was god awful just read the god damn fic ok

Pairing: Slow burn bestfriend!Luke x reader

Warnings: None besides my lack of proofreading.

Word Count: 1.9 k

Notes: Im so so sorry this took so long to write life has been all over the place for me at the moment.

part 1 and part 2 here!!

also i cant stop staring at calum leaning back on michaels arm and just wow what couple goals. and also ashton glaring back at them bc michaels touching his man.

*****

As the number of players dwindled down Luke was beginning to become more and more anxious.  I better not mess up now, like I usually do, Luke was thinking, lying in his bed, staring at the ceiling. I need another win. At least I’ve won twice, unlike Y/N.

Y/N. Fuck. She(He/they, idk who you are) is so focused on winning this year, it’s adorable. Part of me, the part that can’t stop thinking about her smile, or her laugh, or the way she says my name, wants to help her win; even if that means I lose. But the logical side of me is telling me that’s stupid, she hasn’t even shown she likes me back.

But she did kiss me on the cheek earlier today. Thinking about it made Luke’s heart clench tightly, a small smile at the memory tracing his lips. But she’s done that before, it probably wasn’t anything special, just a way of saying thanks. Luke reasoned with himself. But this one was different, it felt different. And she left so quickly afterwards. Was she nervous? Does she feel the same? 

Luke shook his head, his feelings getting the best of him. He should be focusing on how to get Calum out. He’ll deal with you later. Luke turned on his side, trying to get more comfortable in the hopes of finally finding sleep. After a long while, he drifted off to dream, the feeling of your soft lips against his cheek never leaving his mind, no matter his state of consciousness.

*****

Luke woke early that morning to the sound of his phone ringing loudly. He quickly reached over to his nightstand, his heart clenching when he saw your name flash across the screen.

He ran a hand through his curls, even though you couldn’t see him, before pressing the ‘answer’ button.

“Yea?” he answered, his voice hoarse from his sudden awakening.

“Hey,” you replied, trying your best to not focus on how low and gruff his morning voice sounded. Damn it, he’s gonna be the death of you.

“Whya calling me so early?” he asked. “Not that I’m mad or anything, just like, wondering,” Luke cringed internally at his awkwardness, but thankfully enough you giggled.

“Well we’ve got Calum to get out, don’t we? Times a tickin’.“

Luke chuckled. “God damn, Y/N. You really wanna win this year, huh? You know this game could go on for weeks, really.”

You shrugged. “So what if I wanna be victorious a bit early?”

“Fair enough,” Luke agreed, “But what’s the plan? I can tell you’ve already made one up.”

You smirked mischievously. “Open up your door and find out,”

*****

Luke’s eyes widened. He didn’t know you were already here. He quickly rushed out of bed, throwing on a pair of sweatpants before looking himself in the mirror and splashing water on his face.

He jumped to his door, opening up to see you and a guest waiting, smiling at each other. Luke’s jaw dropped, disbelief riding over him that you would go this far.

There in front of him stood Mali-koa, Calum’s sister, who he hasn’t seen in well over six months.

“You’ve gotta be kidding me, Y/N,” Luke laughed, bring Mali in for a hug. She laughed along with him, wrapping her arms around his neck.

Once they stepped back from the hug, Luke ushered you two into his apartment, still in disbelief you’d go as far as to fly in Mali for this game.

Luke flopped on the couch, jiggling his knee in excitement, “I see you have brought a secret weapon,”

Mali laughed at that. “Is that all I am to you?”

The two of them dove into conversation, catching up like old buddied. They had grown up together, so seeing each other was always a pleasant occasion.

Meanwhile, you were a bit too busy trying to distract yourself with your phone to get your mind off of Luke, who was sitting two feet away. Shirtless.

It’s not like you haven’t ever seen him shirtless before, it just caught you off guard. Here you are trying to organize a plan to help him yet you could not stop staring at the line of silver necklaces that laid against his broad chest.

Mali and Luke’s conversation had drifted to this year’s game of Assassin. He had started to ask her about the plan, but apparently she didn’t know, either. 

This led to you, the Puppet Master, if you will. You began to explain the plan, a rather simple one compared to the amount of work(going through trash) it took to get Michael and Ashton out. For this one, you really just get to sit back and watch the plan unfold.

*****

It started with a text. A short, quick one from Mali to Calum. Hey there, lil bro. Want a surprise gift?? You smirked as Mali sent it, waiting for Calum’s reply.

It did not take long for the response. Calum texted back a quick what? and just like that the plan was in action.

Mali revealed what was happening, or what Calum would think was happening. Wellll, I may or may not be in LA right now to visit you...

You giggled, knowing already that Calum won’t be able to turn this down. You kind of felt bad, taking advantage of Calum’s family connection just to win a game, or in this case for Luke to win, but to be fair, the Hoods were an easy-going family; And technically, you didn’t specifically tell Mali too come here to help trick her brother into losing, you more so just knew she was planning on visiting her brother soon and suggested she fly on the closest available day possible. 

Mali boarded the next possible flight right after you two talked, knowing it’d be hilarious to not only trick Calum, but get to brag about it afterwards. And hey, she gets to see her brother, who she hadn’t seen in ages.

Calum started screaming at Mali over text, clearly showing his excitement over her being here. After countless texts, blowing up Mali’s phone, she suggested the two meet up. Calum immediately agreed.

They agreed to meet at a bar that was close to Mali’s hotel, the plan setting in place perfectly. 

Luke started to get giddy with excitement, tricking his best friend bringing his great joy. He couldn’t believe he fell for this so easily.

Right when the three of you were getting ready to walk out the door, Mali’s phone rang. 

“Shit, it’s Calum.” Mali answered the call, her bright face slowly falling. “Gimme a minute, ok?” she told the caller. 

She put her hand over her phone, blocking out her next words. “He fucking remembered the game. He’s asking if I can just meet up with him at his place.”

Your face fell, the thought of the plan failing hitting you hard. But you did not get Mali to fly all the way over here just for a family reunion. Nuh-uh, Luke was going to get Calum out. 

Luke was as determined as you are. “Tell him his place is really far from your hotel, you’re tired.”

Mali quickly reiterated the lines, going on about how much she did just to get here. Calum hesitated, but reluctantly agreed.

“Fine, just don’t post anything about where we’re gonna be. And for the love of god Mali, don’t you dare fucking talk to Luke,” he said before hanging up the phone.

Mali laughed, the adrenaline of this plan settling in. “Let’s go get that bastard out.”

*****

Kicking it in the passenger seat of Luke’s rental car was by far the easiest part of the night. The three of you had driven over to the bar, but you had stayed in the car, locked in and safe away from Calum, your attacker.

Meanwhile, Mali had walked into the bar, where she waits for her brother. Luke, on the other hand, was waiting in the men’s room, waiting for the queue from you to run and get Calum.

It wasn’t long until you saw Calum’s car pull up to the bar, right next to the rental. You slumped down in your seat, keeping your eyes trained on Calum’s body as he walked quickly into the bar, his head checking behind his shoulder, paranoid that Luke was here. And, oh boy, should he be.

You called Luke on facetime, wanting him to film when he got Calum out. He answered from the boys bathroom, and automatically knew what you were calling for. Excitement took over his features, and your heart warmed at his smile. You smiled back, and told him Calum had just entered the bar.

He kept you on facetime as he quietly opened the bathroom door and tiptoed his way around the wall, peaking around to see Mali and Calum hugging. Mali was smiling over his shoulder, her arms wrapped tightly around her brother, and as she opened her eyes she made eye contact with Luke, sending him a quick thumbs up.

Right as they were pulling away from the hug, Luke ran up from behind, placing both hands on Calum’s shoulders. Calum looked behind him, bewildered, before realization struck. 

“Fuck, No! You’ve gotta be kiddin me!” Calum wailed. Luke broke out in a fit of laughter, you along with him. Mali giggled as well, wrapping her arm around her brother’s shoulders. 

“Sorry, lil bro, Y/N’s got a devious brain, that one” Mali remarked, making you laugh harder over the phone. 

“Fuck you, Y/N” Calum laughed. “I was planning to get you out tomorrow,”

“Well not anymore!” Luke hollered, ecstatic over his win. 

“Well now you’ve gotta go up against her,” Calum reminded him, crossing his arms. 

Mali laughed. “Good luck with that, she seems pretty determined this year.”

“Now get out of here, let me enjoy some time with my sister without you asshole” Calum said. 

Luke said his goodbyes, before looking to you on facetime. “Alright, we only have the one car. So I say, I’ll drive us to my home, we can kick it there. No attacking the other. The game will start again tomorrow. Deal?” Luke questioned.

“Deal,” you agreed. “Let’s order some food.” you said, before hanging up and waiting for him to come back to the car.

Before he entered the rental, he reminded you of your deal, as if you didn’t just make it 30 seconds ago. 

“Yes, I understand. Now just take me home. I’m tired.” you replied, the adrenaline from your plan succeeding wearing off.

He got in the car, a small smile still on his face, making you smile a bit, too. You leaned against the car window, admiring the man seated next to you. You two drove in comfortable silence, until he finally said: “Thank you for today. The plan and stuff, it was- it was really cool.” He smiled, turning his eyes away from the road to face you. 

You smiled back, keeping eye contact until he had to face the road again. You kept looking at him, until you slowly drifted off to sleep in the passenger seat, only coming to consciousness once more later.  When Luke had tucked you into his bed, pressing a small kiss to your forehead, the feeling of his soft lips on your forehead becoming engrained into your memory.

*****

thanks for reading!!

taglist for Assassin: @cashtonspicelatte @curlious

@wrappedaroundcal @teenswithbrokensmiles @lu-fakebetch @northangerpark

@summertime-acoustic @yasminesflowers @oh-annaa @that1girlmary