#also hi sorry for not being active i just got a new pc and figuring it out lkjfgklkfgdlj

[quartarcade]

all it wants for christmas is to be able to speak pls

[heybiji]

hi!!! i just wanted to say i really love all of your MASKS stuff. i'm something of a newbie when it comes to the TTRPG community, but MASKS seems to be not very well-known and i think that's a real shame. i'm a huge fan of old-school superhero-adjacent stuff, especially the silver- and bronze-age ones!

by the way, i was wondering if you'd be willing to share some tips for a first-time GM? you don't have to if you'd rather not! i just figured i'd try asking since i was planning on GMing a MASKS campaign for some of my friends later, but despite my decade's worth of roleplaying experience i've never been in a TTRPG campaign nor a GM (or similar) role before

Thank you so much!! I was just lamenting about how I felt bad for the MASKS tag because it is now flooded with all my npc nonsense hahah so this is really nice to hear.

It's awesome you're planning on running a MASKS game for your friends!! There is an indispensable post on twitter I saw that has a LOT of great tips for running MASKS that I recommend checking out. But for my own personal tips that are just me things, here's what I got. Sorry it's gonna be extremely long-winded, it may take a few months to read through it.

(Note: I am also hugely into RP and probably put more into it than what is necessary, especially with MASKS which is meant to be able to be played out of the box. It was definitely not played out of the box in our case because I require a lot out of myself and everyone else to feel good about running something. if anyone else wants to continue seeing me as a normal human being please don't click the Keep Reading)

Since you're running it, make the world interesting to you. If the world runs around themes you're personally interested in then you'll have a much easier time coming up with answers on the fly. For me, themes I'm interested in that lend themselves well to a superhero world: money, power, family, celebrity, media, the 24 hour news cycle and the desensitization of violence. Because I'm interested in this stuff anyway, wrapping a world around them makes it much simpler for me to figure out how the world ticks and thus how the characters fit into it and how the world reacts to them, and I am DESPERATE to find out how the characters react to all the questions and expectations the world is imposing upon them.

Make sure your players have a good grasp of the tone of story so they can make characters that gel well within it. For me the tone is a lil more adult because I'm not personally into younger morality tale stories in tone, it's pretty grounded, and I think comedy and tragedy work hand in hand so I lean into them.

Talk. A lot. Talk about the characters, talk about the world. MASKS is fun because it's a LOT of talking and figuring out the narrative together. It's not a lot of crunchy mechanics, it's all around seeing how the characters react to the world narratively, all hurt and comfort and emotions which (for me) requires people to have a good grasp on their characters and the world. I like to give my players "homework" where I ask them a question involving their characters in some way like "what hero did your character look up to as a child?" so they get to come up with past heroes, or "How does your character feel about _____?" etc etc. The only fans are gonna be your table and fans love to talk so be the biggest fans of the PCs!!

Figure out your framing. I know in MASKS they suggest framing it like a comic book, and basically talking about the frames on screen. For me, because I'm more into movies and tv than comics, I frame it like that. So I have an active "camera" in play during sessions and will ask things like "would anyone like to grab the camera?" to encourage the players to put the character into a scene or "what does the audience see as the camera focuses in on your character in this emotional moment?" There is a LOT of playing up to the camera and framing the sessions as episodes of a show, so it's like, okay, you have several options but what is going to be interesting for the audience to see? I find this encourages the players to have their characters take bigger swings and feel comfortable letting us into how their character is feeling because it all looks GREAT on camera. The camera loves it. The PCs are the story after all.

Because I frame it a show, I also like to play individual ending songs over the "credits" at the end of each episode. So I asked my players to make playlists for their characters so if I feel an episode had a lot of emotional focus on one character in particular, I can play one of their songs at the end of the episode! I also made a general MASKS playlist with a bunch of songs from the era we set it in (2004) to pull from. It's a fun little addition that I really enjoy and that I hope makes it all feel more special.

The Dino Donut Effect: create landmarks in your world. (OK THIS IS GONNA BE LONG BUT WORK WITH ME HERE) They don't have to be locations, more solid landmarks of the story that the characters can refer back to and lean on to make the world feel more "real." I call it the Dino Donut Effect because in our world the thing that made everything click into place was talking out the backstory of one of the PC's figuring out they had the power negation ability. We were talking one night trying to figure it out; we wanted the character to fall out of a building and be caught by a flying superhero and accidentally turn off their powers, so they toss the kid to another flying supe whose powers also get turned off. But we were like... holy shit what is the height of a building needed that can handle this much action in the air without them hitting the ground in 3 seconds. So after a long night of talking about terminal velocity and looking at Splat Calculators we figured out the height of the building, and we needed them to crash into something that wouldn't fuckin kill them. The first suggestion was a truck full of bananas. Nah. We landed on a giant balloon that could take the impact. And the balloon became a giant T-Rex holding a donut that was the mascot of the city's beloved decades old donut shop Dino Donut. And so we decided that one of the two flying supes grabbed onto the kid and the other and flew into the giant balloon to try and keep them all alive, which destroyed the balloon, which was a city institution, and there was a crowd of children there that day that saw their friend Dino Donut die. Killed by a superhero. The balloon deflated loudly so it sounded like Dino Donut was screaming in agony. All the kids were traumatized (screaming crying throwing up), the city was furious because everyone loved Dino Donut, it was constantly in the news cycle, and it ruined the career of the supe that "killed Dino Donut." AND THEN THEY REPLACED THE DINO DONUT BALLOON WITH A LAME "UPDATED DESIGN" DINO DONUT STATUE which everyone hates and people consider to be a memorial to the old Dino Donut. ANYWAY, the Dino Donut effect is that now all the PCs have one single incident to refer back to that they all have feelings about. A couple of them were there that day and heard Dino Donut scream, one is now the protege of the disgraced superhero that killed Dino Donut so she feels uncomfortable talking about it, there's the kid that was saved that day but was sworn to secrecy by the supe so no one would find out about his power negation ability, and then there's the kid that wasn't there because she's an alien that just arrived to earth and now the kids have to explain the incident to her with all their varying opinions. Now the PCs' meeting spot is at a Dino Donut. Having this one solid incident that is both funny and kind of goes into the themes of the world has been an absolute treat. Creating "landmarks" like that in the world has done so much and now I'm like okay I'm gonna try to do this moving forward with any other thing I run.

anyway these are my extremely specific to me tips. my RP standards are kind of high which makes me a bit of a terror but also when the flowers bloom from it it feels GREAT. i'm not sure if this will help but hopefully there is something there that can be useful!

MASKS is fun and simple once you get the hang of it, though, so I'm sure whatever you do you and your players will have a lot of fun! especially if you're someone who is into RP which is the background I'm coming from too; MASKS is extremely narrative! i'll be looking in the tag for your game hehe

(The Day Dino Donut Died art by JD)

[brainrattlers]

Play It Cool - Tyson Jost (42/n)

Pairing: Tyson Jost x OFC (AJ)

Word Count 3786

Warnings: This chapter is a little naughty. There is some insinuation of adult activities going on. Nothing graphic but, you've been warned (so I'll say 18+ just to C my A.)

Need to start from the beginning? Here's where it all began! https://at.tumblr.com/brainrattlers/play-it-cool-tyson-jost-1n/p7no8u1hzuza

Want to catch up? Check out the Masterlist!

Author's notes: Oh geez, I'm sorry you all. I've been MIA for a few weeks. It's been a little crazy with work, interviewing for a job I applied for while I was in Buffalo, and just life. Finally got through this chapter, and am already working on the next to wrap up the season. Definitely not how the Sabres hoped to see their season end, but this is just the beginning for their team. (And I will say I'm nervous with Tyson going RFA this summer, there are a lot of if this, then thats which can happen and possibly cause Tyson to be with yet another team next season. I really hope Buffalo figures it out though, he's a good fit there.) I already have plans for Tyson and AJ's summer, so get ready!

Now where were we when I last left off? Oh, that's right, Tyson was sad AJ couldn't be in DC for his birthday, but AJ has some plans of her own.

*****

Tyson spent the week with a few things on his mind.

First, hockey, obviously. The Sabres being on the bubble of a wildcard spot. The team was working so hard, but still had some very off-nights that were diminishing the likelihood of them playing in the offseason, but they persisted. A week on the road kept Tyson’s focus mainly here.

Next was AJ’s lab results. She had another set run right before this roadie, and was waiting to hear back anything. Tyson wanted his partner in crime to be healthy for all the shenanigans he envisioned them getting into in their future. He also knew that it was bothering her simply not having answers.

Lastly, was his birthday surprise. Since AJ had told Tyson that there was something going down for it, “an experience,” he was told. He had no idea what she was up to, and frankly he was itching to find out. Was it going to be something ON his birthday while on the road? Was it going to be when he got home? He had no idea.

So his mission early on in the roadie was to find out as much as he can to piece it together… maybe AJ had talked to some of the guys on the team? He was going to find out.

AJ on the other hand, was busy working on trying to figure out the logistics of everything, which indeed include talking to a few guys on the team, as well as their significant others. The thought of starting a group chat came up, but it would seem weird if a few guys’ phones buzzed at the same time, yet Tyson’s wasn’t. For now she had to keep it separate.

Quinner: He’s asking again. Do I say anything?

AJ: He’s such a brat. No, not yet. Play dumb.

Quinner: Can do. What’s the word on my gaming rig?

AJ: Just waiting on the GPU to arrive, which is slated for tomorrow. It’ll definitely be ready when you all get back.

Quinner: Awesome

AJ went back to working on a PC on her desk, when her phone started buzzing again.

JJ: Guess what

AJ: I already know, apparently he hit up Quinn earlier. You have no idea what he’s talking about.

JJ: Got it 

Sighing, AJ finally decided to give some sort of hint to Tyson so he’d quit annoying everyone. She waited an hour or so before sending out any crumbs of info.

AJ: Alright Jost, your birthday is tomorrow. It will be celebrated at a later date. Stop asking your teammates for clues (winking emoji)

Tyson pouted as he and the rest of the team were on their way to the arena, but was grinning on the inside knowing that AJ was up to something. Not only that, but she also was finding her footing more in Buffalo, getting out and about, meeting new people - not just his teammates, but WAGs, and just a few people she’d see around the neighborhood often. 

When Tyson was on a roadie, and the weather was decent, AJ would walk down the street and snag a Beef on Weck from Charlie the Butcher.  (This was probably her favorite Buffalo thing so far, she’d never had anything like it prior to moving there.) She’d sit at one of the tables in the lobby and people watch as she enjoyed her sandwich. A few people from the offices would come down at lunch time and start chatting.

AJ started recognizing some of the employees at the local market. She even started going to a bowling alley, getting picked up to sub for people missing on teams every once in a while on league nights. Feeling more comfortable being around strangers, she realized that some of her meds were finally starting to do their thing again.

Braving a bit of rain and snow, AJ finished up her lunch, and headed back. After checking the tracking on some computer part orders, she sighed and looked around. Something clicked in her head after scanning the living room, seeing the pile of laundry she needed to fold in the basket. Through the bedroom and into their walk-in closet, AJ found herself looking through her own clothes, and sliding hangers around of Tyson’s clothes as well. Grabbing a specific hanger, she dropped the garment on the bed. 

Rummaging around in her dresser, AJ grabbed a pair black Culprits and tossed them on the bed. Pulling a couple bags from the closet, she set up her tripod and camera, making sure the memory card was not full. Lamps were moved around. Pulling up an app on her tablet, she set the scene, making sure she’d be in the shot correctly. 

With a quick wardrobe change, finding poses that were sexy but still classy, and not ridiculously silly. were kind of difficult. AJ would tap the screen on her tablet, and try to pose quickly before the timer ran out. Locations were moved, to the living room, and the kitchen. After about an hour and a half, she gave up, having exhausted all of her pose ideas. A few minutes were spent editing each photo. Finally AJ gave up.

AJ: I need your help with something. Tomorrow’s Tyson’s birthday, right? I shot some photos for him while he’s on the road but I need help picking out which ones. So awkward.

Jess: Send away! 

With a deep breath, AJ picked her top 10.

AJ: Alright, I might throw in silly too, but pick  your top… 5.

<4 attachments><4 attachments><2 attachments>

Jess: Oh, wow, Tyson’s going to LOVE these! I’m going to say 2, 3, 5, 7, and 9.

AJ: You don’t think 7 is too much?

Jess: Nooooo he’s going to be all over you when he gets back (winking emoji)

Truth be told, AJ started daydreaming of Tyson striding through their front door with that determined, almost primal look on his face that usually happens after a roadie, or when Tyson was just in the mood. Being gently pinned up against whatever surface was nearest to them at the time was a common occurrence, with a few minutes of intense making out sometimes leading to more. It wasn’t uncommon to find a trail of clothes leading to the sofa in the living room or toward the master bedroom, which had to be retrieved later.

Tyson hadn’t even been gone two days and AJ was suddenly missing him a lot, longing for his touch, his facial scruff against her cheek. The feeling of his arms wrapping around her from behind as she cooked dinner… She sighed at the thought of laying in bed, arm around her as she rested her head against his chest, fingers playing with his small patch of chest hair. This was just as torturous to her as it would be for him.

It hit her at that point that they literally spent a month apart at one point, and she survived. A few more days wasn’t going to be the end of the world.

Thankfully, a shipment of computer parts came the next day, and AJ was going to be occupied the rest of the week… But not before sending Tyson a little impromptu birthday present.

Tyson’s birthday started with a few texts from family, and one from AJ wishing him a good birthday. But compared to the others’ texts, AJ’s had a bit more mystery to it.

AJ: Happy Birthday to my Maple Syrup Man! I hope you have an amazing day. While it’s not your actual present, I have something for you later. 

Tyson: (thinking emoji) What is it?

AJ: Patience babe - you’ll get it tonight (winking emoji) Love you!

Tyson: Love you too! 

With that little nugget of intrigue planted in Tyson’s brain, he was getting antsy as the team was traveling to DC. A group of the guys were taking him out to dinner when his phone buzzed in his pocket.

AJ: Hey Birthday Boy, message me when you’re free. And preferably alone. (winking emoji)

Finishing up installing the new graphics card into Jack’s computer, AJ was starting to fidget and get nervous regarding what she was about to do. As she started cleaning up the cables inside the case, her phone buzzed loudly against the table.

Tyson: Everyone just left, in my room by myself. So… what’s so important that I be by myself for? 

It was time to draw this out to make him get a little more curious.

AJ: I just wanted you all to myself. How was dinner? Did you get cake? Or pie, as it is Pi Day?

Tyson: Dinner was good, had a pretty good steak. Now why do I need to be alone?

AJ: Cake?

Tyson: YES CAKE WHY DO I NEED TO BE ALONE? You’re driving me crazy over here!

AJ: I’m driving you crazy now? Just you wait… (evil imp emoji)

For good measure, AJ waited another minute or two before setting up the text with the photos.

AJ: Happy Birthday, babe <4 attachments>

<1 attachment>

Tyson’s jaw dropped when he opened the photos, finding AJ in various poses, wearing Tyson’s Sabres jersey and showing the smallest hint of her black boycut Culprits underneath. His brain definitely started short circuiting seeing AJ in the kitchen cooking, lounging on the sofa, one cute photo on the bed… but the last one of her on the bed definitely got his heart racing.

Nervous of how he’d react, AJ nearly dropped her phone when Tyson was trying to facetime her. She accepted the call.

“Holy smokes, you’re killing me over here babygirl…” Tyson’s eyes were dark. “I can’t wait to get back home… but at least I’ve got these photos to tide me over.”

AJ blushed heavily.

“This isn’t your actual birthday present but I thought you might enjoy them.”

“I’m going to be up for a while thinking about that last one, and definitely enjoying it. Might have to make that one my home screen on my phone,” Tyson got quiet for a moment. “It’s my birthday, and since you’re not here and I don’t get to have birthday sex ON my birthday, but… what would you think about maybe… over facetime, you and me? I mean you don’t have to if you don’t want to, but… it might be fun?”

The smirk and biting of AJ’s lip was the only thing that Tyson needed to know. It was always amusing watching him go from adorable and almost shy, to straight up feral. She saw him reaching for his earbuds immediately, and could hear that his voice lowered when he made his next request.

“Put the jersey on.”

And because this is a classy joint, let’s just say that AJ and Tyson had a rather exciting evening doing things that are… less than classy. (But fun.)

AJ woke up exhausted the next morning. She couldn’t even imagine how Tyson was feeling… but after watching the game, it might have been just what he needed as he scored an unassisted goal in the first period. 

Finally at the end of the week, after a tough loss to Philly, Tyson was on a flight back to Buffalo and could not possibly be more antsy about getting back to the apartment. Texts were sent as soon as he landed, as soon as he was on the road, and one from the garage that he was on his way upstairs… requesting that AJ was in the jersey (again).

Just as she imagined earlier in the week, Tyson opened the apartment door, dropped his bag in the laundry room, and immediately strode into the kitchen to find AJ wearing little more than that Sabres blue jersey as she was getting a glass of water to take her nightly pills. Barely letting her swallow them and put down the glass, Tyson had already twisted AJ around to face him, lifting her onto the countertop.

AJ yelped in shock of how cold the surface was against her legs.

An intense kiss was shared, but Tyson was impatient. He pulled AJ down off the countertop, grabbing her hand and leading her to the bedroom. Unwrapping his favorite gift was the only thing on his mind that night.

With no practice scheduled in the morning, the couple lounged in bed, finally getting up late in the morning to seek out some brunch. The conversation over waffles was about what was coming up in the next week for both of them. Tyson had a number of home games, with one interruption of a quick trip to Long Island for a game there. AJ talked about how she was meeting up with a few new clients to work on setups for. The big thing she emphasized though was that the following Sunday (not tomorrow), Tyson needed to keep his night free. Yes, it was his birthday present, and no, she was not going to give hints. Also she pleaded with him to not ask his teammates any more questions. 

The week was kind of rough on Tyson as he’d been scratched a couple of games. AJ was taking it harder than he was, but she couldn’t help but have flashbacks of his time with Minnesota again. Thankfully he was playing again by the end of the week. She showed up to the game against New Jersey, and watched as the team warmed up in their Military Appreciation sweaters. It’d been a minute, but AJ forgot how good Tyson looked in green. (To be fair, AJ thinks Tyson looks good in all colors, really.) The team was super intense during warmups, and barely did Tyson kiss his glove knuckles and tap the glass as he skated by AJ. Had to keep the tradition up though.

The next morning, Tyson headed to practice, and then off they went to NYC for their game against the Islanders that night. AJ spent her day finalizing plans and making sure everything would be great for Tyson’s present the next night. Reservations were made. Random texts were sent to not ping the entire group chat at once. It was a GO.

With a 2-0 win, Tyson got back relatively early, coming home to AJ watching KSU playing in the NCAA tournament.

“I didn’t know you liked basketball?” Tyson questioned as he unloaded his backpack from the super short trip.

“I don’t, but it’s where I went to school, and actually was working there before Nate convinced me to move to Denver. Just kind of a nostalgia thing I guess. First year in quite a while that KSU has had a decent team.”

Tyson flopped down onto the overstuffed sofa next to AJ, stealing a few pieces of popcorn from the nearly empty bowl. Unfortunately, the Wildcats just couldn’t come back from their point deficit and lost in the Elite Eight. Tyson had curled up and fallen asleep across her lap as she was playing with the short curls on his head in the last few minutes of the game. His features were serene as he snored lightly. Unfortunately though, because she wanted to go to bed, AJ was going to have to wake him up.

“Tys..” AJ whispered to not jar him awake, “Tys, babe, you gotta get up so we can go to bed.”

His eyes stayed closed as he mumbled something unintelligible.

“Tyson, hon, really we gotta get up, my foot is falling asleep.”

More mumbles, followed by Tyson burying his head harder into AJ’s lap, wrapping his arms around her torso. Clearly he was awake and faking it this time. His body shook a little as he laughed. Rolling off her lap, he sat up and sleepily smiled. Suddenly his eyes went wide.

“TOMORROW IS MY BIRTHDAY MAKE-UP!!! YEAAAAH! The sooner we sleep, the sooner it gets here!”

You’d think it was Christmas the way he was acting. Tyson ran to the master bedroom, and ducked into the bathroom to get ready for bed, leaving AJ just rolling her eyes at the absolute kid of a man she had. But it was one of her favorite things about him… he was an adult when he needed to be, but like her, wasn’t going to grow up otherwise if he didn’t have to. 

That early Sunday was rough on Tyson. He went to the optional skate, antsy as hell in regards to not knowing what was going on. Kyle had texted AJ letting her know that Tyson was still sniffing out clues, but everyone was shutting him down. Both Kyle and Danielle were helping AJ put this all together, she probably wouldn’t have been able to orchestrate the entire thing. Thankfully there was nothing really physical that could be left out for Tyson to see, other than maybe a text message here or there… but AJ was doing pretty well keeping her phone on silent and on herself when Tyson was being snoopy.

AJ clearly caught him when he got home from practice, seeing if there were any signs of fun that was to be had that evening. After a quick nap, Tyson found AJ getting out of the shower (which was difficult keeping him from climbing into the shower with her, but they would definitely be late for the plans). She wasn’t getting super dressed up, just some jeans, a tee, and a warm hoodie. He finished up his shower as AJ put the finishing touches on her hair. Putting down the diffuser, she did offer him some advice.

“Put on something warm, let’s go for a little walk.”

Tyson squinted as he grabbed his Nike SB hoodie from the closet, pulling it over his wet curls. Grabbing his hands, AJ pulled him in for a quick kiss. 

“C’mon birthday boy, let’s go!” AJ giggled as she pulled Tyson to the door. 

The two walked hand-in-hand on Main Street, swinging their hands as they strolled past the Ellicott building, past Tesla Park, past Lafayette Square. 

“Are we going ax throwing?” Tyson questioned, as they neared Hatchet & Hops.

“Nope, just a bit further!”

AJ wasn’t kidding when she said just a bit further, they stopped just past it, in front of a restaurant front blasting music. Opening the door, she led Tyson into Misuta Chow’s. The hosts greeted them.

“Has anyone for the Toasty Josty party arrived?”

“Ah, yes, this way,” the host led them to the back where tables and chairs were marked with reserved signs. 

Tyson immediately recognized a few teammates and their significant others. Cheers for the birthday boy were abound as the couple sat down. A few more people showed up. Dinner and drinks flowed, including a special birthday mochi for Tyson. But the fun was just beginning, as the party moved upstairs to the arcade/bar/karaoke night.

It’s not surprising that the first person to get on the mic from the group was Skinner, not surprisingly an 80s pop song. There were a number of the group that went up and took their turn belting out a tune. Some were surprisingly good! Some were much better after they had a shot or two. Some… were just bad. Video games were played. Lots of smiles and laughs were had.

“Tys, you should go sing!” AJ prodded a bit, as they played Mortal Kombat against each other.

Tyson bumped his hip against AJ’s as he mashed buttons on the arcade cabinet making a combo that nearly took out AJ’s character.

“No thanks, but I know someone that has a beautiful voice that should go up there…”

AJ lost focus on the game as she blushed a little, and Tyson plunged his character’s sword into hers.

“Fine, but only because it’s your birthday, Josty.” AJ winked.

When it was her turn, AJ did a quick shot (and cheered on by the guys) as she took the mic, clearing her throat. Her eyes closed as she took the mic in her hand, the opening guitar notes of Mazzy Star’s “Fade Into You” playing throughout the bar. A little unsteady at the start, her voice found its footing as her eyes found Tyson’s. The softest of smiles graced his lips as AJ’s voice flooded the room. A few surprised looks went her way as they were not expecting her to sing that way. Whoops and applause happened after she put the mic back on the stand at the conclusion of the song. AJ’s face turned a number of shades of pink to red as she quickly got to her security blanket of Tyson with his arm around her. 

A few of the bar-goers, friends and strangers alike  came by and high-fived or complimented AJ. Tyson just beamed next to her, especially when his teammates and friends said something.

“You know, that’s how I fell for her, she was singing while fixing, what was that thing again in the dressing room?”

“Access point.”

Tyson continued, “Yeah, Access Point. She was on a ladder, singing with her headphones in, and I was last off the ice, taking a shower and headed into the dressing room. Her siren song had me hypnotized in the doorway. And she twisted a bit to do something, saw me… and that's when she first fell for me… literally, down the ladder a bit. And as awkward as we both were… that’s when I knew she was the one.”

Tyson pulled her in and kissed the side of her head. 

“Aww, babe, you never told me that last part. But wow, you left a LOT out of that story, that’s probably for the best,” AJ grinned.

A few “That’s so cute!” and “Adorable!” exclamations came from the significant others.

A few more songs were sang, more video games were played, and maybe another drink or two were had. AJ was definitely a bit more tipsy than Tyson, but he also had a game the next day and was behaving. Calling it a night, Tyson thanked everyone for coming out, and thanked AJ (who thanked everyone else for helping) for putting on the party. 

The walk back home was pretty chilly, with a drizzle falling all around the couple. Tyson insisted on holding AJ’s hand to keep it warm, as well to make sure she stayed upright in case some of the drizzle had frozen on the sidewalks. Back at their building, he stole a kiss in the elevator ride up the twelve floors, which still tasted a bit of Jolly Rancher shots. Tyson pulled AJ in tight.

“Good birthday? You’re a hard man to shop for, you know that?”

“No I’m not!” Tyson defensively shot back while tickling AJ as she opened the door to their home, “But this was definitely one of the best.”

Read on, Chapter 43 is HERE.

[gb-patch]

Ask Answers: April 13th, 2021

And we’re back again with more replies so soon, haha. Thank you for the asks!

Your game literally saved me this hell ass year. Thank you so much for the most perfect piece of art I've ever laid eyes on 😫 ... Do you guys have a rough idea when step 3 DLC will be released? I hope I'm not coming off as rude. I just really really love your game.

I’m sorry for the late reply on this! You might’ve already seen the answer by now, but the Step 3 DLC is coming out on the 16th. We’re almost there :D

This may be a silly question but did Jeremy's parents ever find out that Pran had lied about his age and if so, when/how? :3

Pran came clean to them after a couple of years, when he felt secure enough that it wouldn’t ruin the relationship. The Kings were a little embarrassed, the dad more than the mom, but they’re quite good at brushing past those kind of mistakes so it was all water under the bridge pretty fast.

hi! i know you’ve answered a question about alterations in the our life moments by playing them in different orders, but i was wondering if there was a canon order that the moments for each step happen in? i figure with such a customizable game the “canon” timeline for the moments is whatever order the player completes them in, for example in step 1, i like playing the runaway moment pretty early, since cove trying to run away early in summer makes more sense to me personally. thanks!

Yeah, there’s no canon order we’d insist on. Whatever you like can be the official route for you! And that’s a neat way to look at that event.

What if your character isn’t that into physical contact but still wants to be in a relationship with Cove? Would he be offended if you shy away or something along those lines?

He wouldn’t be. Cove knows how hard that can be and is very understanding. If you set his initiative to low, the game always checks to make sure if you want to be touched or not rather than assuming that you do. And if you do choose that you don’t want to, there’s no stress or drama about it. Cove will just say that’s okay!

Hellu! First off, I want to thank you all for such a wonderful game, it's been the best feel-good game I've ever stumbled upon and I can't express enough how much it has meant to me. Second, I've seen lots of people having trouble with making Cove confess before MC which makes me wonder if people will have the same problem in the dlc when you can propose to him. Is it possible to post a guide for that as well when it no longer could count as a spoiler? Again, thanks for such a beautiful game <3

I’m really happy you had such a nice time with it c:. We’ll answer questions about it on tumblr/in the discord if they come up and, if need be, we’ll find somewhere to upload a guide.

Do we get steam key from buying dlc on itch io?

I’m afraid not. That’d be unfair to those who get it on Steam. Plus, Steam isn’t super cool with giving out thousands of keys to be handed out for free on other sites anymore. They can refuse to give us the keys if they feel we’re trying to take advantage of their system.

hi! so if we reject cove's confession in step 3, can we still have MC and cove get together in step 4?

You can confess to him, yeah. But Cove won’t ever try confessing again if the MC turns him down in Step 3.

What if MC acts like someone Cove doesn't like, like Lizzie or Baxter lol

You can’t do what Lizzie or Baxter does to make Cove dislike them. You can play the game and try, but it doesn’t work out. The MC is just too compatible with Cove if you’re fond/crush/love, haha.

Hi! I absolutely love your game, I love the characters they’re all so amazing, thank you for the game haha

I was wondering if you would get the NSFW DLC no matter what Patreon level you were at, or if you would could get it at any level? :)

&

What pateron tier do we need to get the 18+ content for Our Life? It's my new favourite game, keep up the good work!

It will eventually be available at the $5 tier and anything above that! Glad you both like OL ^^

On a scale from 1 (being the worst) to 10, how well do the XOXO jerk squad including JB handle horror?

JB: 8

Everett: 5

Nate: 4

Shiloh: 10

Bae: 10

Jeremy: 8 for non-gore horror, 2 for gory horror

Pran: 9

hello!! i was wondering if any of the boys from the Jerksquad would ever wear a skirt/dress?

None of them wear skirts/dresses out of personal preference. But if there was some kind of reason where they had to do it, none would be that bothered.

How does the jerk squad feel about Christmas? 

Everett: He fucking loves it. That’s the best time of year.

Nate: Commercialized nonsense.

Shiloh: It’s wonderful! So he claims.

Bae: He likes it quite a bit, but only for the joy it brings children/family. He thinks that’s sweet but is too mature to be whipped up into a festive fervor himself.

Jeremy: It’s awful.

Pran: He hates it.

does cove have any pet allergies? yes I know this is a little weirdly specific

He doesn’t! The lucky boy isn’t allergic to any animal.

Very important question: Would Lee and a musical-theatre loving MC run around belting Into The Unknown from Frozen 2? Because I feel that they would 

Probably, haha.

This might seem like a dumb question, so I’m sorry, but with the Derek DLC are we gonna get to hang out with him in person instead of just calling him in step 3? 

The Derek DLC adds events in Step 2 and Step 4. It’s part of his story that you don’t really get to be around him in Step 3. But you don’t need to apologize for wondering!

hello! i'd like to ask if it's possible to play the android version of the game with the dlcs after buying the dlcs from steam. i wasn't expecting my android version to have my dlcs since i bought them from steam, but it had my step 2 dlc for some reason. is this a glitch or does the apk actually detect what dlcs you already have on your pc? if so, how come i don't have the step 1 dlc appearing on android? thanks!

That is some kind of glitch. It isn’t possible for the Android DLCs to be unlocked by having them on PC. Maybe in one of the old builds we accidentally didn’t lock the Step 2 DLC properly. Sorry for the confusion!

Does Derek and Baxter have canon sexualities? Will Derek still flirts with the MC regardless of their gender?

They’re both pansexual and can like the MC regardless of what gender they have.

I was wondering if Miranda had a crush on Cove in Step 3? I'm not sure why, but I got those vibes from her?

She thinks of him only as a friend. Cove isn’t her type, haha.

This is probably a dumb hope, but I hope Cliff find someone he loves after Cove is grown up and everything. Or at the very least he has someone he's very close with after Cove leaves. 

That’s a really sweet thought to have. Cliff stays single, but he’s graysexual and not-particularly romantically inclined. He only dated when he was really young ‘cause that’s what everyone did. Family and friend relationships are more important to him, and he has plenty of that in his life ^^.

Heya! I was curious if there might be a nickname system in N&F? I kind of pull an Elizabeth when I play and choose a different variation of a name like having Rosie in step one and changing it to Rose in step two, then maybe Rosetta in step three for example, but it also feels a little bit odd being scolded using my nickname hehe. That's all I was wondering about, thank you for your time and the wonderful games!

We are hoping to include the option to go by a nickname in Our Life: Now & Forever. But nothing has been programmed yet, so we can’t 100% guarantee it, haha.

Just curious, what would Liz's and Cove's relationship be if MC wasn't around? I feel like they wouldn't get along as well as they do now, especially during the first and second step 

They’d definitely have a lot of friction growing up and they’d likely avoid each other as much as possible. Once they were both older, I imagine they’d be decent neighbor acquaintances. But they still wouldn’t be nearly as close as they are with the MC bringing Cove into things.

What do the customizable eyes look like in the game? Do they look as they are in the creating avatar section? Or do they look different when actually playing the game?

That’s up to you! The doll is just meant to be a general idea. You can apply it to your imagined MC as much or as little as you prefer.

Did Cove go through a "phase" during his adolescence? I don't really wanna headcanon it so I wonder if there's anything (cringy) canon since we missed out on the ages of 14-17 hahaha

Not really, aha. 14-17 Cove is pretty recognizable to his 13 and 18 year old self.

Hello! I'm sorry to bother you, especially with all the messages you get. I was just wondering if the religious wedding venue was exclusive to a church or if there will be different religions of weddings? Also, I love this VN so much, it's so well written and every character is so amazing, thank you for making such a beautiful game.

The church is treated as a historic building rather than anything actively religious, but it’s not the only option like that. There’s a historic synagogue and stuff too! And that’s really nice of you to say <3.

How differently would it play out If MC told their moms about the 20$ deal back when it happened? 

They wouldn’t have been happy and would’ve been far more skeptical of Cliff, aha. But they wouldn’t want to keep Cove away from the MC, so it wouldn’t have been too different in the long run.  

Hello may I ask what Cove's favorite fudge/ice cream flavor would be? Its alright if its not answered 

He appreciates them all, but his top favorites would be the fruit flavored ones and the ones with nuts.

Hi! I really wanted to make mc's house in a game and tried really hard to figure out the floor plan, but I wondered if you have the floor plan of the mc's house so that i can try again with more accuracy?

Thank you a lot for this game, i loved it a lot! (my first play took me 8 hours lol)

I’m really sorry, we don’t have anything like that. But at least you can headcanon that what you did is correct and nothing can prove it wrong, haha.

Hello,I recently started playing lake of voices (I put it off for a long while since I’m usually not very good with horror) and I’m really happy I did!I’m a big fan of your games in general and lake of voices was absolutely great as well.I loved the characters and the dark setting of it,I adored the beautiful art and music and the story was great too,sometimes unsettling and sometimes very sweet.My favorite Route in the game was definitely Lu,I liked his character and was really shocked and distraught by his Route at least two times.I didn’t see the plot twist(s) coming at all!

Besides these ramblings I’ve also wanted to ask if you still remember how to get the lower two CGs on page 5?I seem to always miss them and would appreciate any help.Anyways I hope I wasn’t too much of a bother and I wish the devs a great day!:)

Thank you for all the kind words <3. You get those DLCs by going through the end of the Guide’s character path. You can use the guides on Steam to help you find it/reach the end!

—– —– —– —–

Thank you again for all of these questions :D

We released a new FAQ! It answers common questions and we’ll keep adding more to it. Please check there before sending an ask. FAQ   Also, if you prefer to just see the main posts without all the asks/reblogs, feel free to follow our side account instead: GB Patch Updates Blog

[k1ttyadventurer]

AvA Thoughts and Ideas

Yes, this is my first blog post. I can’t believe it was Animator vs Animation that made me want to interact with people on this site.

@sammy8d257 (I’m the anon that wanted to add to your theories) and @inksandpensblog, I’m tagging you guys because I really like your AvA theory crafting and I want to share my thoughts with you. Hope you don’t mind getting tagged. (Also, I’m so down to discuss this stuff in DMs or on Discord if you want? I’m craving AvA discussion.)

Edit: Rephrased a few things to flow better or be better understood. Also added a new point I just thought of. Edit 2: Fixing things that didn't get fixed the first time.

-

Okay, so, AvA.

(Also, I will be calling Orange/Second ‘Orange’ because that’s what Alan calls him, unless I’m referring to “avatar-state” Orange, then I may refer to him as ‘Second’.)

((Also, also, my thoughts jump around quite a bit, sorry about that! Hope you can follow my thought process.))

(((Also, also, also, my opinions and headcanons expressed here are not set in stone. They could definitely change, which has already happened over the course of writing this.)))

-

1) Chosen’s relationship with Dark. - I definitely think that Chosen liked Dark (no offense to shippers, but I’m talking purely friendship here), however, I would guess that Dark considered the two of them much closer than Chosen did. - Chosen initially followed Dark’s lead when destroying things. It was all he had known, and Dark wanted to do it. But Chosen started noticing it was actually hurting others, and didn’t really achieve anything. - When they came to odds, Chosen struck first, while Dark just tried to stubbornly continue with his plan. It makes Chosen look like he immediately jumped to attacking, but I’d like to point out, in the flashback, he actively wanted Dark to stop attacking others when they were on the Newgrounds page. I think this means that this tension had been building up for some time. It wasn’t a sudden thing of Chosen deciding to attack Dark. It was likely sudden for Dark, because Chosen didn’t communicate with him (probably), but for Chosen, I think the creation of the virus was simply the last thing that convinced him that his former friend was actually an evil person. - (I would love to see a reformed Dark and Chosen being friends! But, I think trying to say he wasn’t all bad in the first place is severely glossing over the fact that he did--and was going to do--some awful, awful things.) - Chosen had no hesitance when he returned from defeating the first spider virus. He was going to beat Dark. - (I also find it interesting that Chosen knew where this second location was. From what I can gather from the AvG reaction, it was meant to be a more secret location for Dark? Did Chosen watch him from afar and discover it? Just thinking.) - TLDR: Chosen had already started expecting Dark might become an enemy before Dark revealed the virus.

2) Chosen’s opinion of Alan. - Plain and simple, I don’t think Chosen hates Alan. I don’t think he even holds a grudge anymore. - Yeah, he definitely hated Alan when he was chained up. He held a grudge for a long while after he escaped. But. I think as he watched Dark’s actions and the impact his destruction had on others, he started to see what Alan saw when Chosen was destroying Alan’s PC. - When he entered Alan’s computer, and started trying to defend Alan’s PC, he was now in Alan’s shoes. He was the cursor, the anti-virus, who didn’t want or choose to have this destruction happen. - After the fight, he sees other sticks on the computer and is forced to consider it may have been his own fault he got 'tamed', since the proof of Alan getting along with, or at least tolerating, stick figures was in front of him. - It doesn’t mean what Alan did was right, but Chosen now sees why Alan chained him. After all, isn’t Chosen himself now on his way to destroy Dark? He and Alan aren’t so different. He nods to Alan, acknowledging him, even forgiving him. Alan nods back. There’s a level of acceptance that has been established between them. Alan respects stick figures significantly more, and Chosen sees Alan isn’t a heartless monster. - So, when Alan’s cursor joins the fight against Dark, they were already on the same page. Preventing needless violence with violence. Not to mention, have you seen how many hits Alan purposely took for Chosen? As soon as the black blades came out, Alan got between them and Chosen as often as he could. Alan came to help Chosen, not just to defeat Dark. - If Chosen could ally so quickly with Dark, and then turn on him when he realized Dark’s morals were wrong, why can’t the reverse be true with Chosen realizing Alan had changed for the better?

3) Chosen’s opinion of Orange. - I believe it was Inks who said that Chosen feels something along the lines of submissive towards Orange at the end. While I do agree that Chosen’s bow doesn’t seem worshipful, I don’t think it’s Chosen ‘giving up’. I think it’s simply showing respect and gratitude in a very similar sense to how the five bowed to him after dealing with the virus. He’s just... far less emotive. It’s a nice parallel.

4) The effects of the virus spiders and blades on Chosen. - Personally, I think the reason it looks like the virus has so little effect on Chosen is because of his coloring. Orange is, well, orange, so the black wounds are obviously going to show. - You can see Chosen showing weakness in both his fight with the spider virus and his fight with Dark. The weakness shows itself in hesitation, slower response, straight up laying in a crater or the water for an extended period of time. - I think at the end, when the Dark sends the virus to infect the internet, Chosen is laying there unmoving because he literally can’t move. His body language reads of someone looking up weakly, unable to do anything but wanting to. The viruses temporarily disabled him (but, notably, it took all of them to do so). Dark can’t actually kill Chosen or delete him, but he’s been successfully incapacitated, so Dark can move forward with his plan, unhindered. - I just don’t think Chosen would ever, ever give up. If he can fight back, he will. He has never backed down once, even when there seems to be no way he can win. He almost lost to a spider virus--there’s even subtle hints later that he’s afraid of fighting them--but he still attacks the whole swarm until he literally can’t anymore.

5) Dark fighting Orange. - With stabbing Orange, it becomes clear that he’s not being as quickly affected by the blade as his friends. That’s why the Dark lord raises him off the ground; he grew impatient. (Also, Chosen reacts to Orange being stabbed? Is it because he knows Orange is one of Alan’s creations as opposed to the other four sticks? Or does he literally feel something?) - Dark becomes absolutely furious at Orange’s attempts to attack him and frustrated that Orange won’t simply die. Too reminiscent of Chosen. Also, I would like to note that, before he even stabbed Orange, Dark hits him the hardest out of the four still standing.

6) Orange’s powers. - Before I say anything about Orange’s avatar-state, I want to point out that his talents seem a whole lot more like Victim’s than Chosen's? I don’t know, if it weren’t for the fact that he has some label saying “The Chosen One’s Return,” I’d say he’s actually the ‘second coming’ of Victim. - Okay, now to his powers. Almost all of them are souped up versions of Chosen’s, with two exceptions. The whole reviving/restoring code ability, and the ability to fly/float without flames. The latter of these two abilities is something we see Dark do after he puts on his black band. The former could also very well be associated with Dark, considering Second had to go to Dark’s console to revive his friends. Food for thought. - There’s a trade off here in the power scaling. Second is so much stronger than Chosen, but obviously can’t tap into his powers whenever he wants. Not to mention, he seemingly can’t use them indefinitely. If Dark somehow managed to avoid getting blasted into the beyond, Orange would be in major trouble if his super-state has a time limit. - Then there’s the whole sleeping thing in videos that likely take place later chronologically? On the build competition video where Orange literally can’t stay awake for fifteen seconds despite punching himself in the face, there was something Alan did that always struck me as odd. He hearted a comment saying something like ‘should we be concerned about Orange’s narcolepsy?’ almost implying that we should be concerned? Maybe I’m reading too much into it, but I haven’t seen him just heart “funny-haha” comments before. (I would also like to point out it is very possible for this to be planned out. These AvM video scripts were likely written after AvA’s scripts even if the videos were finished first.)

7) What next for Chosen doing things with the color squad? - I think, despite the many, many issues that will come up if Chosen ‘play-fights’ with the others (as I stated as an Anon to Sammy), it would be incredibly healthy for him once he can do it safely and have fun. He was born wanting to fight. It’s his calling. And he’s really good at it. Finding a way to do it without hurting others? That’s the best thing he could ever have. - Okay, and, what if, Chosen doesn’t quite understand why Orange doesn’t remember going super, but he decides that he’s going to get to the bottom of Orange’s powers and, in the process, starts training Orange. (It probably starts with Chosen being all, ‘come here’ and flies up, while Orange is just, ‘what? I can’t do that.’ ‘Yes you can. Do it.’ Of course, that blunt method of teaching is not going to work, so Chosen has to learn to communicate better.) Training may or may not actually be successful, but imagine him and Orange bonding. - Both the color squad and Chosen adopting each other. They both parent the other in their own ways, and just. Be cute together. Chosen learns how to people and relax, and gets, like, super attached to these weak little sticks? So, the color squad now has an overprotective higher being watching over them, and the awe they have of his power is quickly cut short when they learn he’s never played cards before? - The sticks also show off their skills to Chosen and he’s just. Confused. Why would you tap blocks just to make a sound? Make something to harvest wheat when you can do it by hand? Why are you eating that. Animals? Okay, actually, holding this cat is nice.

-

(I deleted my old conclusion on accident, and I don't remember what it said. I don't think it was important, though. Thanks for reading! Please share any thoughts if you have any!)

[lulii999]

I absolutely LOVE Beün design. I'd love to heard more about him, he just seems so interesting!

THANK YOU!! That’s so lovely of you to say!!

Ok so Beün. Bear with me I’m going to ramble and explain the whole context because I dont get too many asks and I’m just,,,really excited to answer this question.

Beün is a goliath monk NPC in the latest arc of Iona, the campaign I run with a party of 4 PCs.

Ayden (an Aasimar cleric). Willow (a shifter ranger/druid). Yarou (a human monk). And Tybalt (a half orc bard/fighter).

The party had been travelling through the mountains investigating some people trying to fuck things up. They had heard of kidnappings and increased bandit activity there and the trail led to a hideout. They did combat there with the bandits and found among the remaining kidnap victims, was Beün’s younger brother, Oyos, who was really exhausted and wounded.

They found out that Oyos was from one of the more peaceful of the 3 tribes in the mountainrange, the Helsjic Tribe. He was a monk in training from Hjor, the main Helsjic settlement, and did not have the tribe’s signature green tattoos, meaning he had not undergone their coming of age trials yet.

They also found out that he was captured with a patrol of Helsjic monks, among whom was his brother, The Sentinel. A legendary warrior of Hjor, well known for his 8 spectral Astral arms.

Oyos, distraught and in grief explained that the bandits targeted him, being the weakest looking, and Beün and the other monks surrendered, not wanting further harm to come to their youngest. They were taken to the very hideout they found him in and were thrown in pits alongside other kidnap victims from the surrounding mountain villages. One by one they were feeding them to Marrow Stalkers, creatures that fed on people’s bones while keeping them alive as much as possible. They were going to take Oyos but all the monks offered themselves up before him, including Beün. The last thing he heard was his brothers screams.

The party set off for Hjor to return Oyos and news of the Sentinel’s fate, Oyos suffering from extreme survivor’s guilt. They spoke to the chief of the Helsjic who in turn relayed the news to the people, all of whom were distraught at the tribe’s heavy losses. Especially Beün, who was always all smiles and got along with everyone he met.

The party convinced Oyos to join them as they tried to get to the bottom of these kidnappings, as clues they found led them to the West side of the mountain range.

After journeying and investigating, they found the big bad, a resurrected evil chief of one of the tribes who vyed for supremacy over all. His plan to get everyone to bow down was to use the magic found at a sacred site in Hjor and lots of blood (in this campaign blood is embued with The Essence of Life itself, which is very powerful and magical), to resurrect an ancient evil, the incarnate of fear.

The big bad escaped, and they had found the missing bodies of the Hjor monks, very much dead and skulls crushed, but Beün’s body not among them. They raced back to Hjor in pursuit, and after investigating the situation they found one of the evil accomplices, an older monk of Hjor and their teacher turned spy, standing over non other than Beün, his long hair chopped, laying there weak and bloody, missing all four of his limbs.

They saved him, and Beün, weeping, said that he had betrayed the secrets of the sacred site of Hjor to those with intent to destroy the village, secrets that were entrusted only to him. It was a choice between that and seeing them torture his brother, and he, ridden with guilt apologised profusely to Oyos, and begged him to kill him. The party intervened, and convinced both of them to hold off and hang in there till at least after the fight. They brought Beün to a safe place and pursued the bad guys. The old evil was unfortunately resurrected, destroying the sacred site, and battle ensued. With difficulty they defeated it and the evil chief, and over the next few days helped the tribe rebuild.

They eventually helped convince Beün to look past his shame and stand up and move forward. To train the new generation of warrior monks. With the help of the Helsjic chief, a druid named Inavu, they regenerated his limbs and helped him get back on his feet, both figuratively and literally. They got to know Beün a little bit more, and saw his charismatic personality shine through, which included a series of morbid limb puns, an extremely petty competitive streak, loud, laughing, and absolutely vibrating with energy. It wasnt hard to see why he was extremely likeable.

This arc had just finished, but in the more recent sessions they had invited Beün, Oyos and a couple of human NPCs to a dumpling festival, and to a party at their friends house...

...a noble, halfling house.

But yeah thats pretty much it for Beün so far, sorry for the long read but hope you guys enjoyed it!

[niennavalier]

So

Because roommates are playing in my D&D campaign, I can’t tell them all the fun rants going through my head. Which means you all/the void get to hear them

Basic premise of the campaign (which has actually been going for like 6-7 sessions now? IDK exactly cause we never initially planned for it to go long): the party has found this lost/legendary city that’s hidden in the middle of the desert and invisible to the world. (I watched Road to El Dorado, okay?) There be some shenanigans, but they learn that the crystal which has been protecting the city/keeping it invisible and such is failing. Monsters getting into the city, and the city itself is now faintly visible from the outside, which wasn’t true before. They learn of the existence of other crystals scattered across the world and that they exist to bind Talos (as a result of some big ol’ good vs evil fight from long in the past). His followers plan to “corrupt” and then take the crystals for themselves in order to reverse those binds and let chaos rule again (which the party doesn’t fully know yet, but they have some hints of it).

And at the same time, the city itself is undergoing some shit. Because I wanted to fill out the world as being more than the party and the crystal. So the Mayor left some months back without returning, and people aren’t pleased with how things have been going since. There are whispers and plans of some sort of uprising in order to demand answers (from the young tiefling left in charge of the city who is Not Ready for this sort of responsibility...and is lowkey panicking cause he knows things aren’t good. The party Rogue isn’t impressed with him and honestly yeah, that was the point) and get shit back in order. And the party split last time, half of them examining the tunnel where I plot dumped about the crystals - and a teleportation circle is laying dormant - while the other half went to go see the crystal. 

So I was like “Nice, I can intro the whole uprising thing to the half of the party not in the tunnel and give them some more shit to deal with/give them more of a sense of the current state of the city/etc etc”. And I did that, had them meet this sorta sketch older dude who was in charge of that movement, saw that they did want to fundamentally help the people of the town, and sorta offered for them to join (while also giving the information much more easily than I normally give them, because a lot of my NPCs have reasons to not implicitly trust these randos). I left the second to last session with “So, what do you say?” as a question of whether they wanted to join (whether genuinely or just to learn more of what was up).

And then was thinking of things for the most recent session, which involved some fleshing out of the people involved in said uprising, assuming they would be interested. And instead got the most blase response to a goddamn uprising: effectively just “that’s great but its not our particular goal here byeee”. Which then led to roommate wanting to investigate the room with the crystal (which I knew was basically empty anyway because the room itself doesn’t serve any purpose beyond...being a room) and rolling well on said roll. And then being like “why do I always roll good on stuff that doesn’t really matter?” And I’m like...I’m sorry the room legit doesn’t have anything in it, but also I legit just threw so much plot at you about this uprising because I thought that would be the main point of what you’d be dealing with??

Which was then compounded by them returning to the rest of the party, relaying the random info that I gave for the investigation check (which amounted to just a rough timeline of what had happened earlier) and sorta glossing over the entire uprising that was coming up. Granted, it was mentioned, but more in that people are just unhappy with the current government, not that shit’s about to go down real soon. AKA, in probably about 6 hours from where they currently stand in game...which also lines up rather well with an invasion of the city by followers of Talos...which is actually happening at the same time because one of the people heading the uprising is actually one of said followers of Talos...but they don’t know this because they chose not to look into the uprising at all.

So they have a lot to deal with soon.

Not to mention the other thing that happened. Because one of the first NPCs I introduced to them was this half-drow rogue (Vaerys, who is probably gonna become a PC for me to play the day I finally don’t have to be the forever DM). And they didn’t trust him, because he wasn’t willing to tell them any actual information (his family is being held by followers of Talos to ensure that he does his job: bringing a shard of obsidian into the city to weaken the crystal and take it...or at least not rat them out long enough for them to do the dirty work themselves...so I’d say he has reason to not trust anyone in this place). But he’s been something of a constant to the game so far, because they know he has information that might be useful, so they’ve gone seeking him out before. And same roommate who was looking around the tower made a good arcana check, so I figured I’d use that to let them in on the obsidian shard and how Vaerys is connected to the entire thing. So that happens, they find him, and I figure I’ll throw them a bone and pretty much just have my boy plot dump his backstory (not the details, but the important bits) at them. (to be fair, he chooses to trust them because roommate’s character is naive and so it’s pretty clearly not a deception. Seemed both a little more lenient than usual without being entirely out of character). So now they know about the demon invasion, and that he plans to get the crystal out so that his family is safe and the town isn’t razed to the ground by a bunch of demons or cultists or whatever the servants of Talos decide to throw at them.

Being your typical dumbass good characters, roommate is like “just give us the crystal so we can destroy it and the servants of Talos, and we can protect your family!” To which his response is effectively “How about no, because you’re like, 5 people vs an entire cult and whatever army they’ve gathered, and I’m not risking my family just cause you’ve got an inflated sense of morality. I get that you want to do the right thing - I don’t want these people to die either - but this isn’t a black and white thing, and you definitely can’t kill a whole army on your own”. 

To which roommate responded by essentially quoting Spock (you all know the quote), and I’m internally like “ooh boy, that’s not getting on his good side. ‘Just sacrifice your family so that we can maybe protect this town’. That’s really gonna resonate with him”. Obviously he’s not responsive to that logic, so then roommate goes “I’m gonna try to steal the amulet”

What

“...okay, I think that’s a Dex check in this case, cause it’s pretty small and he’s holding it up slightly away from himself”

Now, keep in mind, I rolled for Vaerys’ stats, so he’s a Rogue at slightly higher level than they are. Roommate is playing a Barbarian. Guess whose Dex was too fucking high for roommate to beat?

Yeah.

So now roommate’s character (and her boyfriend’s character, who was sorta just along for the ride) are now on Vaerys’ bad side, and they have no idea where he is either, because they ended up getting stopped by the bartender in the tavern where they found him. (cause, yknow, people running through the tavern means trouble so barkeep stopped them like “What the fuck is going on. Get out. Now” Especially after roommate tried to convince them all to go chasing after him and failed...although what she doesn’t know is that those patrons are either normal people who were hoping for a normal evening, or people involved in the uprising with much more pressing things on their mind than the barbarian telling them to go on a wild goose chase for reasons they don’t even know to be true yet)

Aaand then they activated the teleportation circle (after relaying all of this wonderful news), two of them went through, and now are stuck on the other side because those were the decided on mechanics of these teleportation circles for this game. While the rest of them are in a city - essentially on the brink of some kind of revolution - which is about to be probably raided by an evil army, with a once-potential ally on the loose and no longer on great terms with them

(because side note: Vaerys also feels like he’d been betrayed by other roommate’s character, who told him that they wouldn’t rat him out to the wizards working on figuring out the crystal - aka another of my PCs who’s getting recycled for this game, and then brought said wizards down to the tunnel where Vaerys was presumably still hiding. They wanted to get help deciphering the walls, but instead shit just went sideways because I warned them that Vaerys might still be in there and I stalled for as long as I fucking could, but then they just went in anyway and I was like “...well, I warned yall. Now there’s a dagger at your side.” So Vaerys is only okay with the party Rogue - because hell yeah neutral characters, that whole solution was actually rather creative. And the sorcerer who just joined the party last session, because he just hasn’t actually met her yet)

(Other notable bit from that part between roommate and Vaerys was her saying that “well if the demons can know if you betray them, then if we take the amulet and smash it, then they’ll know it’s not your fault and your family will be fine!” And this wasn’t exactly how I said it in character but like...these people are chaotic evil. Emphasis on Chaotic. Would you trust them to care the specifics on why things went wrong? Or just believe that if things go wrong, they’ll kill your family regardless? Talos is the god of chaos, after all. These folks ain’t lawful by any means)

Point being: they got a lot to deal with

[kiruuuuu]

Glaz/Echo oneshot in which Echo refuses to apologise for something, uh, unsavoury. (Rating T, chaotic nonsense, ~1.4k words) - written for @magehir​!! 💞💞

.

“You pissed into my closet.”

Echo immediately loses track of the complicated equation he was working out in his head and feels the sudden urge to bang his head against the tabletop. Looking up, he’s presented with an inexplicably disgruntled Glaz looming over him and glaring. All that’s missing are his hands on his hips to complete the nagging housewife aesthetic. “Are you nuts? I did no such thing.”

“You’re very welcome to come home and smell it yourself. Is that why you were gone so early this morning? Because you didn’t want to be forced to clean everything?”

“No. I was gone early because that’s the time we go to work, Timur, though I suppose I can’t expect you to know this seeing as you’re never on time.”

“What?” Indignation warps Glaz’ features into an even more alluring grimace. There’s no way Echo would ever admit it, but Glaz looks stunning when he’s angry. “I’m always punctual!”

“I highly doubt that, considering you always get up more than an hour later.”

“That’s because you take forever with your stupid hair. You get up with messy hair, comb it, and then very carefully mess it up again.”

“Not true. I don’t take that long. And besides, it’s not stupid.” He chances a quick glance around to look for the nearest reflective surface just in case there really is something wrong with his hair. When he comes up empty and turns back to their argument, Glaz seems even more unimpressed. “You were late today. So there’s that.”

“Yes. I was late because I had to throw all my clothes in the wash because they stank. Because you, as I said, pissed into my fucking closet!”

“Don’t pin this on me, are you sure you didn’t do it yourself?”

“Of course not! Why would I do that?”

“Well why would I do that? Just the fact that you’ve been yelling at me for five minutes is reason enough not to.”

“Maybe it’s payback for the time I threw up all over your favourite trousers. You do have a vindictive streak, you know.”

“But I already forgave you for that. That’s long settled.”

“Yeah, because you made me buy you a new pair.”

“Which you chose based on which ones made my ass look best.”

“Can you blame me? Have you looked in a mirror while wearing them? Wait, I have a photo somewhere…”

And while Glaz is tapping away at his phone, Echo heaves a sigh and turns to Mute next to him, intending to complain some more when he realises that everyone in the workshop is staring at them, except for the young Brit who nonchalantly keeps tinkering with one of Smoke’s gas grenades. Zofia, in the process of pouring herself a glass of water, apparently abandoned her previous activity halfway through without setting the bottle down, and has created a small flood on her side of the room. No one around her seems to have noticed.

“Haven’t argued in public before, mate”, Mute murmurs distractedly as if he could read minds.

That actually explains a lot. Echo considers addressing the room but figures a statement like this is normal or maybe a reassuring at least neither of us has threatened to break up yet wouldn’t improve the situation. Not with how appalled Mira already seems to be.

When Glaz shows him the evidence, accidentally navigating back to the gallery and revealing about a hundred secretly snapped photos of Echo, he can’t even muster up the energy to be angry.

.

“I don’t ever want to argue in front of other people again”, Echo says without interrupting his head massage. Glaz is curled up on top of him, petted into a content, catatonic state, and so it takes him several seconds to reply.

When he does, he stretches first, pressing closer to him and rubbing his cheek against Echo’s chest. It’s so freaking adorable he considers abandoning the topic in favour of just snogging until they can’t breathe but freezes when Glaz sleepily mutters: “Shouldn’t have pissed in my closet then.”

His irritation is back full force. “I didn’t fucking -”

“How do you know?”

“- what?”

“Really, how do you know? We both can’t remember much after Dom got the gin out. How can you be so sure it wasn’t you?”

“You know what, maybe it was Dom. He did stagger home later, but that doesn’t disqualify him.”

“Don’t pin this on other people now.”

“He’s a perfectly viable option! I admit that it’s unlikely you yourself did it, but that doesn’t -”

“Besides, you’re Asian. You already don’t deal well with alcohol.”

Echo’s eyes begin hurting from rolling so hard. “Seriously? We’re doing stereotypes now? Then explain to me how I managed to drink more than you did. You’re Russian after all, you should have vodka running through your veins.”

“But just because I’m Russian -” Glaz stops mid-sentences, re-evaluates and seems to belatedly understand. He turns in Echo’s embrace so they’re eye to eye. “I take it back. I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine.” Echo purses his lips in anticipation of a kiss, maybe some more, a sweet locking of lips turning sloppy, or even just Glaz pushing a hand under Echo’s shirt to run his finger over warm skin, but instead Glaz just looks at him expectantly. “Hm? What is it?”

“Don’t you also have something to apologise for?”

“What do you …”

“My closet.”

Due to the ensuing fight, they miss most of the film they were watching and restart it, only to get caught up in a discussion about whether they’ll order or make food, with both of them being too lazy to make anything but too indecisive to agree on any takeaway. After realising they still have leftovers, they gorge themselves on an adequate amount of stir-fry rice and end up much the same as most evenings: Echo gaming at his PC and Glaz stretched out on the couch, sketching and letting the TV entertain him in the background.

“Why do you always argue with me?”, Echo wants to know over his shoulder during a particularly long matchmaking queue. Frowning, he corrects himself: “Why am I the only one you argue with? You rarely do with your team or your friends.”

Glaz doesn’t even look up. “Because with you, I don’t feel like I need a filter.” And when Echo doesn’t respond, he adds an amused: “I know you’re blushing.”

.

“Honestly, it’s a good thing you can keep up with Glaz in drinking or else the Russians would’ve long lost what little respect for you they still have”, Bandit announces cheerfully and slaps down a Draw 4 card.

As usual, it’s only the two of them left in the game, due to Echo’s superior skill in strategy and probably Bandit’s cheating, the other guests having congregated in the kitchen and leaving the two of them to battle it out. “What do you mean?”, Echo wants to know and increases his hand size to whopping 10 cards with a sigh.

“You’re terrified of mistreating him in front of them, so they think you’re proper whipped. Which, if you ask me, isn’t even far from the truth.”

How very dare he. Just because Echo convinced his guild to adapt their raid schedule to Glaz’ liking doesn’t imply - “Why do we even still invite you over?”

“No idea, especially after I was so drunk last time that I ended up pissing in Glaz’ closet.”

Echo’s eyes snap up in disbelief. He opens his mouth, ready to tell this little sack of shit exactly what he can do to himself, but it’s at that moment that Glaz enters the room again. Perfect timing. He waves him over with a: “Timur! Come here. And you, Dom, repeat what you just said.”

Bandit’s genuine amusement shifts into mild concern. “Please don’t. I just told you I wouldn’t take the blame for you, didn’t you listen? No amount of money can make this right – if you urinated all over Glaz’ clothes, you should just admit to it and apologise.”

And while Glaz starts yelling at Echo about bribing others to be his scapegoats, while Echo is utterly dumbfounded and merely gapes at the audacity, Bandit puts down another Draw 4 and winks at him.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 173: Campus Tour

Previously on BnHA: Class A hashed out everyone’s roles for the upcoming band performance/dance party. Momo wound up on keyboard, Jirou is doing vocals in addition to bass, and Kaminari and Tokoyami will be playing guitar. A staging team was also assembled, consisting of Aoyama, Sero, Kirishima, Kouda, and Shouto. And the rest of class A (as well as Aoyama again, for some reason) will be on the dance team. The next day Deku went to meet with All Might. He explained that he could only maintain 20% OFA for a short while and that it wasn’t enough to beat Overhaul and he needed some sort of long distance attack. All Might was all “then LET’S TAKE THIS OUTSIDE, SON”, and they went out to the forest and he had Deku activate 20% OFA and do a cool wind attack and fuck up some trees! And long story short, basically Deku has to learn how to utilize 20% OFA in just his hands rather than in full cowl, so that way he can whip out the wind attack whenever he wants without putting too much strain on himself. Having settled that, we then fast-forwarded one month later to the day of the cultural fest, (ETA: nope) with Mirio bringing Eri to U.A.

Today on BnHA: Mirio and Deku take Eri on a fun tour of U.A. to help her get a little more familiar with the place before the chaos and commotion of the festival. During the course of their wanderings they first come across the members of class B who are constructing the set and props for the fantasy play they’ll be doing in the festival. They then stop by to greet Hadou (who’s running for Miss Con which is basically a beauty pageant thing) and Tamaki before heading down to the support department, where they ooh and ahh at Mei’s cool giant robot. Finally they take a breather in the cafeteria and ask Eri what she thinks. She says she’s not sure, but since everyone is trying their hardest, she wants to see how it will turn out. The kids take that as a win, and Rat Principal -- who is sitting at a table nearby -- says that he’s excited too. We have a brief flashback to a meeting he had with the Commissioner General, who wanted U.A. to cancel the event. Rat Principal begged him to reconsider, saying that he felt it was necessary for the students. In the end they got the okay, on the stipulation that if the security is breached or the alarm goes off for any reason, the event will immediately be called off and evacuated. Back in the present, Deku bids Eri farewell, and one week later Mina abruptly boots him off of the dance team.

(As always, all comments not marked with an ETA are my unspoiled reactions from my first readthrough of this chapter. I’ve read up through chapter 199 now, so any ETAs will reflect that.)

did these motherfuckers really just spell Kacchan as Ka-chan

(ETA: the Jaimini’s Box translations have had a lot of issues lately so I’ve mostly been sticking to Mangastream now)

also [whips out nerd glasses] according to the U.A. class schedule from the databook, the kids in fact do not have Saturdays off, typically. though maybe they have this specific Saturday off? since they said the temporary license course group also had a break

anyways, these guys are lucky that I’m in a super good mood and don’t feel like nitpicking too much BECAUSE!

IIDA MOTHERFUCKING TENYA HAS HIT THE DANCE FLOOR Y’ALL

I’m going to create a new folder on my PC right now just for pictures of Iida dancing. once it is full I will post them all, and then whenever I am sad all I’ll have to do is go back and look at that post

(ETA: oh yeah I still need to do that at some point lol. when the going gets tough, remember Dancing Iida)

also it appears that Aoyama has fully jumped ship to the dance team, because the staging team is just Shouto, Sero, Kiri, and Kouda now

meanwhile Mirio is hiding in the bushes plotting some sort of hilarious entrance!

BUT HE HAS BEEN SPOTTED

DAMMIT DEKU

also! I figured that since Eri was there, it must be the day of the festival! but I guess it isn’t! which means he’s brought Eri to hang out with all of her class A sibs early! WHICH MEANS THIS IS GOING TO BE MY FAVORITE CHAPTER OF ALL TIME, ISN’T IT

MIRIO WHAT ARE YOU DOING

I’m crying sob help

lmao Ojiro is all IS THAT SENPAI’S KID?? as though that’s somehow the ONLY POSSIBLE EXPLANATION. not his little sister, not his cousin, not even Aizawa’s kid despite him also being right there. nope. this must be Toogata Mirio’s illegitimate child

(ETA: Mangastream version just says “is that his kid” which makes me think he is in fact referring to Aizawa, which makes a lot more sense but is less hilarious though.)

Ochako and Tsuyu are immediately complimenting Eri’s fucking adorable outfit, which is 100% the correct reaction. FOR FUCK’S SAKE. HER FIRST TIME WEARING SHOES AND THEY GOT HER THE CUTEST FUCKING BOOTS IN THE WORLD. and the little kid purse that matches her outfit. I can’t

Mirio is now hauling himself out from the bushes dejectedly while Aizawa explains that they got permission from the principal to let her visit

apparently the principal quite rightly said that Eri should visit on a quieter day first so she could get used to being around people since she’s been cut off from society until now and they don’t want her to get overwhelmed

and she is indeed shyly running back to Mirio and taking his hand

so now Iida’s coming up to introduce himself

...and Mineta is officially being the MOST cancelled he’s ever been, holy fucking shit. usually I just ignore his crap, but jesus. “I’m looking forward to meeting you again in ten years!” he says. to a six-year-old. how the fuck is that funny. can’t Aizawa just fucking expel his ass already. can we just delete him already please. god

(ETA: it’s even worse coming right off of 172 where he was much more tolerable than usual. one step forward, ten million steps back. took so many fucking steps backward he went and tumbled off a fucking cliff good grief)

ugh. anyway, so Mirio’s asking Deku if he wants to come with them

they’re going to walk around U.A. with Eri and give her the tour I guess

EYYYYY

I was just thinking to myself, it didn’t seem right that all of the other interns got to say hi and not him!

omg

HE’S KIRISHIMA! YOUR NEW BEST FRIEND!

now they should go take her to watch the band practice because I want her to meet Bakugou. I just do. it could go very good or very bad but either way, I’m all in

(ETA: am I the only one who wants this?? I agree with the anon who said a while back that we have been robbed of Shouto+Eri interactions, but also! Bakugou Katsuki, who recently leveled up and got his babysitting certification! Bakugou, who would be so awkward around her, but supposing there was ever a crisis situation though? he would be super gruff and he’d tell her not to worry and that he won’t let anything happen to her and that if any villains try to start some shit he’ll kick their ass. Bakugou who wouldn’t be at all intimidated by her quirk and would think it’s badass. Bakugou who also knows what it’s like to be held prisoner by villains, even if it was only for a short while and under very different circumstances. idk you guys I just think there’s a lot of potential there and I’d love to see it. my list of people who I want to see interacting with Eri is getting fairly long by this point. and for that matter, Aizawa himself is on that fucking list too because even though he’s been acting as her guardian, it’s usually Mirio and Deku who interact with her directly.)

why are these weirdos putting their uniforms back on

is there some rule that you have to be in uniform whenever you’re at school or what

(ETA: actually this is probably the case since everyone else also has either their regular or gym uniforms on)

anyway, they’re running across some third years from the business department, and they seem to know Mirio and they’re saying hi

why is everyone on this damn campus jumping to this conclusion lmao

(ETA: and this time the MS translation is making the same joke. I think)

they’re handing out program fliers to him and Deku and telling them to come visit during the festival

oh dang

holy shit. they’re really going all out. even for something like a culture festival, U.A. don’t play

EYYYYYYYYY

I love that Monoma appears to be standing up on tiptoes to peek at them excitedly. “FUCK YEAH TIME TO INDULGE IN MY FAVORITE PASTIME”

Deku’s asking Eri if she’s okay as though he’s not the one who nearly had a heart attack just now

she says she thought it was the “falling lady”, referring to Ryuukyuu. oh my god. so fucking cute I’m gonna die

(ETA: the notion that Eri’s lasting impression of Ryuukyuu is as the giant dragon that came busting through the roof just tickles me so fucking much you guys)

Monoma is declaring war as usual

WE’LL SEE ABOUT THAT, FRIEND

oh my god

“completely original”

this is the best joke ever if this translation is accurate. please be accurate. class B you are giving me life right now

(ETA: you bet it’s accurate. and since this is the future, THIS SHIT IS ALL IN THE PUBLIC DOMAIN NOW, Y’ALL. so put those lawyers away and prepare yourselves for the fantasy epic of a lifetime)

Awase is knocking him out and apologizing because Kendou wasn’t there so “he went unchecked”

OH MY GOD

HE’S RUNNING FOR MISS CON. THIS WHOLE ARC TRULY IS HORIKOSHI’S TENDER, LOVING APOLOGY FOR THAT HALLWAY OF BULLSHIT

(ETA: yet another mistranslation from Jaimini but CAN YOU IMAGINE THOUGH. but yeah, obviously what he’s actually saying is that Kendou is running)

Deku’s still shocked and says Aizawa didn’t say a single word to them about Miss Con. probably because he wasn’t able to mention it to you all at a time when Mineta was conveniently out of the room

(ETA: and also because it’s the least rational thing in the world and he will be DAMNED if his kids get caught up in that nonsense when they have more important things to be doing)

Mirio is apologizing to Eri for “suddenly showing you U.A.’s bad side” lmao

look at his face though

“I’m sorry Eri. Monoma was acting like a cotton-headed ninny muggins”

EYYYYYYYYYYY

she’s got it in the bag this year for sure

she’s floating over to say hi!

IS THAT TAMAKI WITH THE CAMERA??

Deku is so flustered he can’t even make eye contact. U.A.’s very own awkward bi icon

Hadou’s saying that she’s never won and that there’s a girl in the class G support team who beats her every year

in a world of quirks, it occurs to me that even lashes like this might legitimately be “maybe she’s born with it” and not automatically “maybe it’s maybelline”

EYYYYYYYYYYYYY

GOOD OL’ TAMAKI

Hadou is smiling and saying that this year she’ll definitely win

I’m amazed and pleased that she hasn’t started asking Eri inappropriate questions. even she can respect boundaries when it’s important! UNLIKE SOME CANCELLED PURPLE FUCKS

ohhh snap now they’re stopping by the development studio

okay now this looks more like what I was expecting the last time we saw this place

CAN ONE OF YOU GENIUSES PLEASE BUILD SOMETHING TO RESCUE TONY STARK. HE IS STRANDED IN SPACE

Mirio says they’re preparing for the technology exhibition that they hold every year. apparently it gets a lot of media attention

oh here we go

eyyyyyyyyy

so she’s showing off her latest giant robot, and they’re acting appropriately impressed. everyone loves giant robots

she says that for the hero department, the sports festival is where they garner attention. but now their department gets to be the main attraction

although, given the type of attention the sports festival garnered, you might want to reconsider being so pleased about that

also, didn’t Aizawa say that this year’s festival would be more lowkey due to all the shit that’s gone down recently? I mean, that’s the plan, anyway. apparently we’re going to be invaded by a gentlevillain so we’ll see how that actually goes

oh shit, Mei’s robot just blew the fuck up

“AGAIN”

HEY EVERYONE! IT’S A SINGLE PANEL OF THE TENTH MOST POPULAR CHARACTER, SHINSOU

HEY’S STILL HERE. JUST FYI. STILL EXISTS. STILL POPULAR

(ETA: you guys I’m so excited I finally got to the part of the manga where Shinsou Does Stuff Again. you don’t even know)

so now they’re at the cafeteria and Eri’s sitting down with some juice

they’re asking what she thought and whether she thinks she’ll be comfortable at the festival

;_____;

she is so good so pure I love her please protect her always!!!

lmaooooo

ERI YOUR BROTHERS ARE HUGE FUCKING DORKS

OH MY GOD

WERE YOU TWO HERE THIS WHOLE TIME

Rat Principal says he’s also excited for the culture festival and that the students always do their best to create a good time for everyone

oh?

I’m so curious to hear more about U.A.’s behind the scenes struggles. dammit. Rat Principal always gotta keep a tight lid on gossip

now he’s walking off and telling them to enjoy the festival to their heart’s content

YESSSSS A FLASHBACK TO U.A.’S BEHIND THE SCENES STRUGGLES!!

LAY IT ON ME

well now we finally know who this guy is. this is the second time we’ve seen him; the first was right after All Might’s retirement

he’s not wrong. U.A. has been a magnet for trouble lately, and they have several students who are known targets of the League. not to mention a weakened All Might. basically another attack is probably inevitable at some point, and they don’t want to test fate, because if there is an attack and anything goes wrong, that’s probably it for the school and that’s the last thing they need. they desperately need this place to stay open

Rat Principal acknowledges that he’s right, but he says that he considers this event to be necessary for the kids

and that’s true also! they really need the morale boost right about now. they’ve had one hell of a year

Rat Principal, you’re really not so bad for a totally evil guy

so they apparently worked out an agreement, and have fortified security yet again, and if by any chance an alarm sounds -- even if it’s false -- they will immediately suspend activities and evacuate

back in the cafeteria, Midnight says that talk of class A’s program has even made it to the staff room, and she’s telling them to work hard

well of course class A was discussed in the staff room. I imagine they’re the number one subject of gossip most of the time no matter what

Eri’s asking what Deku’s class is doing, and he’s explaining that it’s going to be a dance party

this chapter cleared my skin and watered my crops you guys and it’s just the best

and now we’re cutting to one week later

LMAO

WE’RE SORRY MAN. YOU JUST DON’T GOT THE RHYTHM

ah well. at least he has an adorable little munchkin of a sibling whom he can now spend the day wandering the school with again, maybe. and beating back gentlevillains with his new finger cowl wind move

there is a bonus page but I’m short on time today to include it, so I’ll just throw it in there tomorrow instead! plus ultra!

[moonstruckbucky]

All My Stars [1] | b. barnes

SUMMARY: Bucky knew the minute he hired his new assistant, he was screwed. When she got engaged, he was double-screwed.

PAIRING: CEO!Bucky x fem!reader

WARNINGS: None

NOTES: Consider me a fan of the CEO!Bucky trope. I had this bopping around in my head for a bit and decided to get it going before my scatterbrained self forgot it all. Enjoy! xx

ALL MY STARS MASTERLIST

Part One

Bucky was running late. Again. He knew it by the sunlight streaming through his window and also by the shrill ringing of his goddamn phone. The body beside him stirred and groaned, shifting under the sheets as the phone echoed in the expansive bedroom. Bucky groaned, reaching out blindly for his phone, which he answered with a grumble.

“Did you forget?” the British voice on the other line teased. Running a hand over his face, Bucky sighed into the receiver while the brunette beside him cuddled further into his sheets.

“Forget what?”

“I’ll take that as a yes,” Peggy sighed, though she was smirking on the other end. “My replacement starts today, and we’re about fifteen minutes late. I’m downstairs.”

“Shit,” he groaned, head flopping back onto the mattress. “All right, I’ll be down in five.”

“Do I need to take out the trash?” Peggy asked then, and Bucky snorted, opting to reply by hitting ‘End Call’.

“Sorry, dollface,” he then addressed the brunette beside him. Her hair was mussed and makeup smeared. “I need to go and you unfortunately can't stay. There’ll be a car waiting downstairs for you.”

Like he told Peggy, he was downstairs, dressed and hair perfectly coiffed, in five minutes. He was tying his tie when he stepped out into the New York sunshine, a slight breeze on the air signifying that autumn was coming. The British brunette was standing outside the sleek black car, sunglasses on and signature red lipstick stark against her pale complexion.

She tilted her sunglasses down her nose. “Well, it could be worse, all things considered.”

“Thanks, Peg. Good morning to you, too.” Wordlessly he accepted the coffee she handed off to him and slid into the backseat beside him. “Tell me again why I needed to replace you?”

“Because I can’t be your doormat forever,” she snarked back, smirking. “Steve’s accepting that new position at Fury Enterprises.”

“Ah yes, Steve’s becoming a partner. Punk. But why am I losing you again?”

“You’ll be fine, Bucky. This new girl is going to be another me, just you wait.”

Bucky scoffed. “Unlikely.”

The drive to the office was spent with Peggy telling Bucky all about her new replacement. Her name, her former job, what Peggy liked the most about her. She sounded a lot like Peggy, and if she paid attention to Peggy’s training, it would be smooth sailing.

Meanwhile, across town, you sat in the reception area of the office building, tapping your heel against the carpeted floor. Never had you known a boss to be this late, and it made you wonder just what kind of person James Barnes was. You’d done your research on the company after Peggy had contacted you about your resume, wanting to learn everything there was to know about Shield Architects, Inc.

“Miss L/N,” Peggy’s chipper voice echoed through the reception area, “I am so sorry we’re late. This is Mr. Barnes, the CEO of Shield.”

You stood up from the chair, straightening your blouse, and reaching out to shake Mr. Barnes’s hand. Your eyes trailed up, breath hitching when you took in the fact that your boss was a goddamn looker. Bright blue eyes smiled down at you, and his sharply-chiseled face was framed by dark brown hair.

“It’s a pleasure, Mr. Barnes,” you exclaimed with a nervous smile.

“Please, call me Bucky,” he said, grinning a heart-stopping smile, “and the pleasure is all mine. Please forgive me for my rudeness in being late. I....lost track of the days.”

You missed the snide side-eye that Peggy sent him.

“Well, hopefully I can help you with that.” Bucky looked momentarily surprised by your sudden burst of confidence, but then he smiled again and held a hand out towards the elevator.

You walked between him and Peggy as the latter handed you a planner. Skimming through it, you tried to not get overwhelmed as you took in Bucky’s overflowing schedule. Peggy went through explaining the next month’s activities, the most important meetings and conferences. In the elevator, she handed you a file of Shield’s current projects–blueprints, budgets, zoning permits. Each one was color-coded, and you admired Peggy for that.

Bucky, standing on your left, watched you as you absorbed every piece of information Peggy threw at you like a sponge. He knew the job as his assistant was harrowing and stressful at times, but with the way you countered Peggy’s tips and training with questions of your own, Bucky didn’t think you’d have a problem keeping up with him and his busy lifestyle.

“Mr. Barnes prefers his coffee black with two sugars only,” he heard Peggy announce. “You’re to have one ready every morning.”

Bucky opened his mouth, feeling as if Peggy was painting him as some kind of pompous spoiled douchebag, but you were nodding rapidly along, jotting it down in the planner before Peggy launched into something else. He simply stood quietly, knowing he’d never get a word in between Peggy’s directions, until the elevator came to a stop at the top floor and let the three of you off.

You were enamored with the office. Open concept, floor-to-ceiling windows around the entire room, brightening it up considerably. Bucky’s office was offset to the left, the oak door closed with his name engraved on a plaque. Your new desk was a half circle and organized neatly, sitting in the middle of the room.

Bucky stepped over to his office and unlocked the door while Peggy showed you your new desk. She walked you through some of the programs she frequently used on the computer, which, unsurprisingly, was a top of the line Mac. You’d grown up on PCs, but you could figure it out you were sure.

Peggy spent the rest of the morning showing you the ropes and then at noon, you broke for lunch. The building had a cafe on the bottom floor that she took you to, and you bought a wrap while she settled for a salad. She picked a table and you both sat down to eat.

“So, be honest with me,” Peggy began over her salad, “are you overwhelmed?”

You chewed slowly, mulling over your answer. Setting down your wrap, you wiped your hands on a napkin.

“It’s a lot, I’m human enough to admit that.” She nodded in a silent request for you to continue. “But organizing and micromanaging is my specialty, so I don’t think there’s much that scares me.”

“Then I think you’ll be fine,” Peggy replied with a confident beam of her red lips. “Bucky is a great man to work for. He likes his business organized and his workers on top of things, like all of them do, but he’s lenient with pretty much everything else. Except tardiness, so if you’re going to be late you’d better be letting him know a day in advance.”

You nodded in understanding, crumpling the plastic wrap to throw in the trash once your lunch was over. Peggy excused herself from the table and walked over to the counter. She paid for a to-go box and then walked back over to you.

“For Bucky. Sometimes he forgets to eat, so always prepare to pick up something for him. He likes the buffalo chicken wrap. Let’s go.”

When 5:30 rolled around, your mind was sufficiently worn. Peggy had drilled so much information into you that you were sure you could recite Shield’s mission statement forwards, backwards, and in Greek. As you shut down your station, Peggy kindly waited for you. Glancing up, your eyes caught Bucky in his office; his door was open, the lights still on as he bent over his laptop and an open manila folder.

“He often stays late,” Peggy mentioned, catching your glance. “Poor chap’s going to work himself to death one of these days.”

Frowning, you looked over at him again. Before you could rethink it, you called, “Goodnight, Mr. Barnes.”

He didn’t seem to hear you, didn’t even look up from his work, but you didn't take it personally. Peggy offered you a tight-lipped smile as you walked towards the elevator. On the ground floor, Peggy stopped you with a hand on your arm.

“Call me after your first official day tomorrow. We’ll go out for a celebratory dinner. Oh, and don’t forget Mr. Barnes’s coffee tomorrow, black—”

“Two sugars, got it.” You smirked and she did too. “Thank you, Peggy. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

“You will. And, if you ever need help, just call me. Don’t want you feeling all alone up there.”

“Thank you, Peggy. Get home safe.”

Once back at your apartment, you kicked off your heels in the doorway and padded into the kitchen to make yourself some tea. You’d brought Shield’s project file and Peggy’s donated planner home with you to get ahead of the game in terms of meetings, conferences, and board meetings. Over your mug of tea, you also went over the calendar to see if there were any corporate events planned in the future to extend Shield’s networking reach.

There weren’t. So your mind got to work in formulating an event that would not only benefit the company but the public as well. Your previous job had been in Human Relations, and you were very good at organizing and planning events such as auctions, workshops, and galas. You’d present your ideas to Bucky sometime next week after you had a chance to get completely settled.

Bucky Barnes Tag List: @moirasimagines @mooniightbucky

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[yourmandevine]

Come on, come on, come on: get through it

NOTE: A lot of people who have read this have shared their condolences and well wishes, which is really nice. Some have also asked if there was anything they could do for Sean’s family, which is amazing. If you’re able and feel moved to, there is: There’s a college fund for Winnie. Thanks to everyone who has reached out.

***

One of the best friends I’ll ever have died on November 29, after a fight with cancer. He was 36, and he leaves a wife and a young daughter, all of which is an infuriating sin. I’ve been trying to find a way to sit with that. I’m not sure how well I’ve been doing.

I gave the eulogy at his funeral mass. Whenever I’ve talked to people about that, they have apologized to me, have said they were so sorry that I got asked to do that, that I had to do that. It’s weird: I never looked at it like that.

I feel so lucky that I got to know Sean Enos-Robertson -- to really know him, what he cared about, what he loved, what made him so special. You rarely get to know anybody like that, and when you do, sometimes you don’t wind up liking what you see. That never happened with Sean; he was a font of joy, someone who lived to make the lives of others just a little bit better. His wife asked me if I’d write something down and talk to people about this beautiful, amazing person I was so lucky to know. That wasn’t a burden. It was a privilege. An honor.

And now, a few weeks later, as I’m trying to figure out how to process this, I keep thinking that I’d like to share that.

You guys won’t get to know Sean, which is so, so decidedly your loss. But maybe this lets you know how much he meant to me, to us, and to so many other people, and it makes you think about the people who mean this much to you. And maybe you tell them.

Maybe you tell them while you have the chance, because telling people you care about them, and who they are in your life, and why you love who they are full stop is one of the best things there is, and there’s never a wrong time for it so long as it’s before the end. I got to tell Sean how I felt before he died, and I got to tell his family, and his friends, and his students -- my God, his students -- and now I’m telling you. Sean Enos-Robertson was brilliant, the best, a light in a lot of lives. I miss him, and I love him, and I always will. Here’s why.

***

Hello, everybody. My name is Dan Devine, and I'm a friend of Sean's. I am a friend of Sean's. I'm not going to use the past tense for that; it didn't stop being true last Thursday, and it's never going to.

On behalf of Courtney and Winnie, and of the Robertson and Enos families, I'd like to thank you for being here. In a broad sense, Sean believed in community: in the power of people uniting for a common good. More specifically, Sean believed in love. He loved his family — his wife and daughter, his parents and in-laws, his brother and grandmother. He loved his friends. He loved his students and colleagues. He loved the people he leaned on, and who leaned on him — those of us here today, and many others who couldn't make it, but are sharing their love, and our grief.

Sean was one of my favorite people. He was magnetic. He was invigorating. He was cool as hell.

Sean radiated. He was a candle: someone who lit up and warmed every room he walked into, every person whose life he touched. This ... this is a tough room to light up. So we're going to have to do it together.

Before we do it, though, I want to acknowledge a hard truth I've been sitting with, and that you might be sitting with, too. It is deeply, impossibly unfair that Sean is gone — that he was taken from us so soon. Too soon. Way, way, WAY too soon. That's real, and it's OK to feel that.

In my better moments, though, I can set that aside and make room for gratitude — that Sean walked into my life in the first place, that I got as much time with him as I did, and that I got so much exposure to such a shining example of how to love.

There's a song by Tom Petty that I really love called "Walls." There's a line in the chorus that goes, "You got a heart so big, it could crush this town." That was Sean. Sean loved openly, fearlessly, completely — he hugged like you could win medals for it. He loved with everything he had, with his whole body. And if you don't believe that, then you never saw my man dance.

He loved music, and especially sharing it — I don't think anybody made me more mix CDs to try to put me onto something that I hadn't heard. (I'm pretty sure I have about five different "best of Blur" mixes. Sean really loved Blur.)

I met Sean at Providence College in the fall of 2000, right near the start of our freshman year. I'd seen him around at meetings for people who wanted to apply for shows on the college radio station, WDOM, but we didn't become friends right away. I know exactly when that happened: October 29, 2000. (I looked it up.)

That night, Mike Doughty, the singer from Soul Coughing, played a solo show at the Met Cafe in downtown Providence. I took the PC shuttle downtown by myself to catch the show, and somewhere around the weird acoustic cover of "Real Love" by Mary J. Blige, I saw that tall, skinny dude again. We awkwardly sidled up to one another to watch the show, and wound up walking back to campus together. We talked about bands and school and the station and whatever else two 18-year-olds talk about, all the way back home, and that was that. From that moment on, that was my man.

We hung out a lot, as evidenced by the staggering number of old photos I've looked through recently in which one or both of us had extremely tragic haircuts, facial hair, or sideburns. We lived together for two wonderful years in an awful apartment in Cranston, R.I.

The first year, we lived with our friend Todd. We had two parking spots for three cars, so one of us would always be blocking somebody in. Whenever it was time for the blocked-in person to get out, he'd ask, "Are you behind me?" And always, every time, Sean would answer, "100 percent, man."

It was this small, dumb thing, but it always made me laugh. Sean was really good at that.

We learned how to be adults together, finishing school and trying to figure out how to pursue our passions. After searching a little, Sean found his. In 2007, he took a job teaching history to middle schoolers at Harlem Academy. He shared with scores of students his belief in civic responsibility, in actively engaging with our nation's past, in interrogating history to learn about how we got where we are and how we might make decisions about our future. He loved teaching, and he was incredible at it. In 2016, the Gilder-Lehrman Institute of American History named him the New York State History Teacher of the Year, and they don't just give that out.

Sean's commitment to his students went beyond the classroom. I got a much clearer picture of that when Courtney sent me a note she received after his passing from one of his students, sharing both condolences and her memory of Mr. Robertson as someone who "would always reach out to me when he thought I needed it." One day, in eighth grade, this student confided in Sean that she thought she wanted to be an artist. She braced for stereotypical adult dismissal, the classic speech about "getting a real job."

Instead, she got a giant smile and an inspiring conversation about Courtney's job as a graphic designer, about that being a real path, and about how she might be able to realize her dream. Courtney invited her to visit her job to see firsthand how it was done, and that it could be done. She's kept that dream throughout high school, and now into college, thanks in part to Sean's willingness to listen, to care, and to open his life to a student in need. I'm willing to bet there are a lot more stories like that.

The student concluded her note with a beautiful sentiment: "I pray that you and Winnie and the rest of Mr. Robertson's family and friends are able to find peace and comfort, and I pray that you are able to think of him and feel peace and joy, because I genuinely think that's what he would want." I think she's exactly right. Sean wanted to lift people's spirits, to lighten their moods; on the day he invited some of us Brooklyn friends over to tell us that his fight was coming to an end, he kept moving back and forth among playlists of incidental music, setting a soundtrack to hum underneath all the laughs and tears and reminiscing. Even then, dude was still DJing.

We learned how to be somebody's partner, and eventually somebody's husband, together. Sean met Courtney in 2002, and as I remember it, he knew very, very quickly that he'd hit the jackpot. I'm sure that they had their share of tough times over the years, especially recently, but they always seemed immensely supportive of one another. Their love, from the outside, always seemed easy, in that way that let you know it was right, secure for the long haul.

Something Sean and I had in common, and that I've always felt grateful for, is that we always knew our magnetic north. Everything in our life oriented around the person we wanted to spend it with, and wherever work or school or whatever tossed us, we could always go back to that, back to our person, and get pointed in the right direction. Courtney was his compass, his best reason for doing everything.

When they were going to get married, Sean asked me to stand up with him as his best man, and to give a toast. I dug that toast out of a box last week, and here's the part that matters: "I think that all guys — the honest ones, at least — will admit that the women in our lives do a lot of the heavy lifting in helping us become decent, valuable men. And this is no exception [...] When Sean called to tell me that he and Courtney had gotten engaged, the first thing I remember thinking is, 'They deserve each other.'"

Their time together deserved a better ending than this. But what came before — the 16 years of knowing this great a love was possible, the nine years of marriage, the two and a half years of Winnie's life? That was exactly what they deserved.

Courtney is one of the strongest, fiercest, most remarkable people I've ever met — a woman who has faced unimaginable challenges and kept putting one foot in front of the other. I can't fathom what today is like for you, Courtney, but I want you to know: we are going to be awesome for you and Winnie right now. And tomorrow, and the next day, and all the days after that. I'm sorry, but you're stuck with us.

We learned how to be fathers together. Sean was there for me when my Siobhan was born, ready to cradle this tiny thing in his arms and envelop us with love, and to look me in my bloodshot, frantic eyes and let me know that I didn't have to be OK, because I was never going to be alone with it all. I wanted to do the same for him when Winnie was born, but Sean never seemed to need it. He was just ready: all open arms and full heart and perfect love.

Winnie is amazing, and brave, and funny, just like her dad. She's one of my favorite people, too, and I ache for her. But I'm also so grateful that there are so many people who will line up to tell her just how fantastic her father was. She will always know how special he was, and how special she was to him, and how much he loved her. We'll make sure of that. It might be the most important thing any of us do once we leave here today.

This hurts. This is hard. It's not supposed to go like this. But we don't get to make these kinds of choices. All we can do is deal with the fallout.

I'd ask you to remember the words of Sean's student: "I pray that you are able to think of him and feel peace and joy." Sean Enos-Robertson spent 36 years doing everything he could to bring peace and joy to everybody he met. Sean loved with his whole soul, and we can do that, too. We can do that for him. Let's be candles. Let's radiate.

[maevefiction]

Your Light in the Mist - Chapter 35

All the way to Kauai Pasta our phones chirped and rang incessantly, Anne being among the first to reach out. She loved my ring, thought it was the most wonderful news, and THEN I asked her if she’d be willing to be a participant in the wedding party. Her shriek was delightful, quickly followed by her asking me if I wouldn’t rather have someone closer to my own age, to which I retorted that I might have seriously injured myself due to rolling my eyes so hard at her bullshit.

Veronica called as well, and I booked her immediately to help with styling for the event. I was never the sort of girl who had a vision of THAT DRESS, so I had no idea where the hell to even begin. All I knew was that I wanted to be comfortable and not look like a Disney princess, but if I was going to avoid showing up in baggy shorts and a T-shirt, guidance from a professional was definitely in order. Norman texted his congratulations to us both, but other than that, most of the attention was directed to Tom’s device, though I chimed in with my thanks on every call because he insisted upon using speakerphone mode. Such an outpouring of support wasn’t something I was used to, and by the time we got to the restaurant I was ready to hide in the hotel room for a few hours and adjust to being someone’s fiancée.

The fettuccine alfredo was even better than I remembered, and Tom’s penchant for stealing my food even worse. After we’d finished inhaling all the goodness, Simon sauntered over to the manager and suddenly the entire establishment was singing happy birthday to me. Every time I tried to slide down the booth seat and under the table Tom grabbed me and pulled me back up, ignoring both my pleas for help and my obviously empty threats to withhold sexual favors from him if he didn’t comply.

Once we returned to the hotel, Simon nabbed the garment bag that contained my costume as well as the duffel of accessories that he’d brought from back home, and we adjourned to my and Tom’s room while Tom remained with Luke, who’d been the transporter of his contraband. I hadn’t actually SEEN my costume yet, having put my full faith in Simon when he talked me into opting for Lady Loki instead of just plain old Loki. When he unzipped the bag, I peered at its contents, looked back at Simon, back into the bag, then settled my gaze upon a pair of grey eyes alight with mischief.

“Um, Simon? WHERE IS THE REST OF THE COSTUME?”

The left side of his mouth turned up in a lopsided grin. “I don’t understand what you mean, Maude. That’s the costume. Lady Loki.”

I pulled out the pieces. All four of them. “This isn’t a costume. This is a bikini, two pillowcases strung on a belt, and a cape.”

He nodded. “Uh HUH. Lady Loki. The horns and the boots are in the duffel bag. You are going to LOVE the boots, by the way…”

“SIMON. Where is the SHIRT? Where is the SKIRT?”

“Lady Loki doesn’t wear a SHIRT. She wears a TOP. A midriff baring top. And kind of a skirt, but the sides are OPEN so you can, you know, SEE. How do you not know this? You’re fucking…oh, wait, sorry, you’re engaged to the man who plays him. Her. Whatever.”

I flopped down on the bed, staring up at the ceiling, left wrist and hand resting on my forehead. “Somehow I doubt that particular look is set in stone. I’ve seen the comics, and looked at a ton of cosplay pictures. There are shirts. There are skirts. And, by the way, even though we’re engaged I’m still going to be FUCKING HIM. My god. What the hell am I going to do for a costume NOW?”

He sat down next to me, the black faux-leather top and bottoms held aloft in his hands. “You know, it’s NOT a bikini. It’s actually a push-up bra and booty shorts. And they’re LEATHER.”

An entirely new sound came out of me as I sat up, a hybrid of a terrified scream and maniacal laugh. “HA! Well, if it’s a push-up bra and booty shorts I suppose that makes everything JUST FINE then.” I touched the shorts to ascertain the exact material. “And that’s not REAL leather. So pffft on you. And my midriff has not been seen in public since…since…like, never and…”

Simon dropped the bra into his lap in order to cover my mouth with his hand. “LIES! Your bathing suit has cutouts in that area. You’ve also exposed bits of yourself on that very balcony out there, and then THE REST of what the good lord gave you as you walked across this very room. And heaven knows where ELSE you’ve stripped down for the sake of carnal pleasure. Come on, Maauuudddeee. At least try it ON.”

My head shook back and forth as I pouted. “I don’t WANNA.”

He leaned in, cheek brushing mine like a cat demanding attention. “But…but…imagine Tom’s FACE when he SEES YOU.”

I stood, snatched the pieces from his lap and charged into the bathroom, peals of his laughter echoing behind me. After stripping naked, I stared at myself in the mirror, taking careful note of the fact that I appeared to be somewhat…smaller. I hadn’t weighed myself since New York in July, and admittedly my clothes had seemed to be getting a little bit looser, but we’d been so busy it wasn’t something to which I gave more than a passing thought. While I’d spent a good amount of my time naked during our road trip, said time was typically spent pursuing matters other than gazing at my reflection, and it was only when faced with the prospect of putting on a ridiculously skimpy outfit that I finally viewed myself with a critical eye. And, realistically, after more than a month of frequently skipped meals and constant activity, I supposed I shouldn’t be surprised that I’d shed a few pounds.

First I wiggled into the booty shorts, my back to the mirror, then stared at the push-up bra. It fastened in the front, which typically spelled massive wardrobe malfunction for me, but I swallowed hard, took a deep breath, slipped it over my shoulders into place and hooked the clasp. As I exhaled, I fully expected it to pop open, but it didn’t. Nor did it pop open when I reached in to adjust the girls. The shoulder straps were easily an inch and a half wide, which perhaps distributed the load more efficiently than most others I’d tried. And my lord, push up indeed. I yelled to Simon.

“Dude, I could serve drinks off my tits. Seriously. It fits perfectly.”

“Of course it does. Boobs may not be my thing, but I’m dead on with sizes every time.”

I snorted. “You’re full of shit. You either peeked or Tom did and told you.”

He scratched at the door with his fingernails. “Whatever. Fuck you. Let me IN.”

As I turned to unlock the door I got a glimpse of myself, mainly my ass from the side.

“Sweet baby Moses, I look like a fucking Kardashian in these shorts.”

Simon flung the door open, grabbed my shoulders and spun me around to face the mirror, busily studying my rear end, shaking his head vehemently.

“Oh honey, no. No you do not. But if you want to I’m sure I can get my hands on some padding…” His eyes roamed over my body, then met mine in our reflection. “Maude. You look so beautiful, I may weep.”

I rolled my eyes. “Please.”

“No, I mean it. And not only are you lovely on the outside, you’re even more gorgeous on the INSIDE. Tom is a lucky, lucky man.”

I turned to face him. “You’re not switching teams on me, are you?”

He pinched my cheek. “Not unless you’re hiding a cock in those shorts.”

“We’re both being very non-PC right now, aren’t we?”

Roaring with laughter, he slapped my ass and ran out of the bathroom. “Being indiscriminately insensitive to all of humanity is one of my favorite things to do with you. Now come on out of there and put on your BOOTS. Then we have to call the wig and makeup person, because I need help too, and then we’ll both finish putting on…”

I interrupted him as I entered the living space. “I’m sorry, did you say wig and makeup person?”

Sighing, he patted my shoulder. “Yes. Tom borrowed someone from the Skull Island set for himself, and we get to use her too. YAY!”

Words escaped me as I wondered what the hell Tom was up to, needing an actual professional for his costume. And it was a wig AND makeup person. My god, could he…would he…I grabbed Simon by both biceps.

“You know, don’t you? You know who he’s dressing up as. You have to tell me, Simon. HAVE TO TELL ME.”

“Woman, I kept the whole proposal nonsense a secret…if you think I’m going to spill something so insignificant you are sadly mistaken.”

I leaned in so we were nose to nose, knowing staring into his eyes was my best chance of detecting a falsehood. The man had a poker face like none I’d ever seen, but I’d witnessed him being less than truthful enough times at the office to figure out his tell. “Lestat. It’s Lestat, isn’t it?” Just the slightest tick to the left. “OH MY FUCKING GOD IT IS I AM GOING TO DIE.”

He took a step backwards, crossing his arms. “Totally not Lestat, Maude.”

“Don’t you try and lie to me, old man. You have a tell, you know. Your eyes shift to the left every time. Every. Time. And they did just fucking now.”

“Um, I’d like to point out that if I’m an old man that makes you an old woman because, HELLO, same age.”

My index finger connected with his chest. “Your attempt at diverting my attention to a potentially inflammatory topic in order to disguise the fact that you’re a lying liar who lies is neither appreciated, nor will it be successful.”

He covered his face with his hands. “Oh lord help me she’s using her Smartypants Businesslady words. Make it stop.”

“Apologies, but this will continue until you opt to proffer a full, one-hundred percent factual, truthful confession…”

His hands fell from his face as he fanned out his fingers in exasperation. “FINE. You’re right. Happy now?”

“NO. Because now I’m afraid of WHICH Lestat he’s going to be. Old school? Rock god? Modern tailored suit with flair? I think I need to sit down.”

Simon shoved me down onto the bed. “Please do, you naughty spoilsport. I’m making my call.”

He wandered out onto the balcony, and I completely forgot about the fact that I’d soon be traipsing around half-naked in public on purpose as visions of Tom in all of Lestat’s various incarnations flooded my brain. Simon’s knuckles rapping on my noggin snapped me out of my trance.

“Martina’s on her way up. Look alive, woman.”

Blinking as I looked up and met his gaze, I reached out and poked his thigh. “So…who are YOU dressing as?”

“Draco Malfoy.”

“You’re joking.”

“No, I’m not joking. Luke and I are coordinating. Harry Potter universe.”

I leapt off the bed. “Luke as Harry? That is just…it’s too…adorable. I can’t wait…”

Simon shook his head. “Ah, ah, ah…not Harry.”

My head tilted to the side. “Not Harry?”

“Not Harry.”

“But…who…Ron?” He shook his head. “Dumbledore?” Another shake. “Hermione?” A snort, then a wide smirk, followed by a deadpan expression as he spilled the beans.

“Snape.”

“GET THE FUCK OUT.” Just as the words were out of my mouth someone knocked on the door. “Shit. Go get that. I’m going to hide.”

He answered, and an hour and a half later we were dressed and ready to roll. Martina had painted my nails gold and adorned me with varying shades of green eyeshadow, heavy black liner, and black lipstick. The wig was black as well, the very realistic faux hair nearly reaching my ass. Golden horns topped it off, thankfully made entirely of plastic, the headband portion set with a huge faux emerald smack in the middle. There were strips of gold sequins taped onto the edges of my bra that formed a triangle, and a matching band to go over the belt portion of the skirt. Elbow-length pieces of fabric that resembled gloves with no fingers were wrapped with gold elastic string, and then came…the boots. They were black leather, skin-tight thigh high lace-ups with a two and a half inch platform at the toe, a 4 inch chunky heel and I loved them more than I’d ever loved any other pair of boots I’d ever worn, ankles be damned. The cape turned out to be way too long…like five inches too long, so that was scrapped because that plus platform boots was a perfect recipe for disaster. One or the other, yes. Both, no fucking way.

Simon’s wig made his eyes stand out even more than his natural blond, and his gleeful expression when he exited the bathroom in his robe made me wonder if he was wearing anything underneath it, at which point I closed my eyes and thought of truffles to distract myself. Martina gathered her things, wished us luck, smirked in my direction and away she went.

I rested my right hand on Simon’s shoulder. “Gotta say, you make a damn lovely Draco. So is this like a May-December romance thing after you’ve left Hogwarts or what? Of course we’ll have to ignore the fact that Snape, you know, DIES…”

“Maude, since you’ve attempted to put a damper on my fantasy I’m going to call your fiancé because if seeing him…and I know what he looks like, Luke sent me a pic…doesn’t shut you up, nothing EVER will.”

“You realize you’ve just essentially invited me to tackle your sorry ass and snatch your phone, don’t you?” As I moved my hand to his chest and began to push, the door opened, and I spun around so quickly I almost fell over. Luke was in the doorway, his black wig in motion, tendrils of hair brushing his chin as his head turned forward. He bit his lip at the sight of Simon, and I heard Simon gasp behind me at the same time. Luke began to stride in our direction, and as he drew closer I saw an arm holding the door open, the body attached to it not yet visible. The fingernails were black, arm ensconced in what appeared to be a very finely woven black metallic netting, the outer portion of the bordered sleeve gaping open, held in place by a black metallic fabric tie between the wrist and the elbow that matched the border. When I noticed that the sleeve didn’t end at the wrist but instead formed a V-shaped hand wrap also made of the border fabric, crossing the top and slipping between the middle and ring fingers, it dawned on me which Lestat I’d be spending the evening with. Surprising myself, I began walking toward the source of my imminent doom instead of running to lock myself in the bathroom.

A bit of blonde hair dangled into the formerly empty doorway, followed by an incredibly pale face…his blue eyes resembled ice crystals, ringed with black liner, lids darkened with shadow, lashes ridiculously pronounced as the result of a heavy application of mascara. His lips were pinker than they normally were, a dusky shade, and the hair, my god, THE HAIR. It reached his shoulders, curly and so, so blonde and I saw FANGS and was just about to lose my shit when he slid fully into view and into the room, knees buckling at the sight of me, leaning on the wall for support.

I nodded. “Same, asshole. Same.”

He laughed, completely exposing the fangs, and I resumed my walk, grabbing hold of his jaw with my right hand when I reached him, tilting my head and leaning in to inspect his canine teeth.

“Are those, like, really…you know…attached?”

He nodded, chin still in my hand. “Uh huh.”

“As in, ‘I can totally bite stuff’ attached?”

His eyes widened, and I felt the warmth of his hand on my belly. “Uh huh.”

I released his jaw and turned to Luke and Simon. “So, um, how set are you on going to this party, exactly?”

Simon whipped his wand from his robes and pointed it at me. “Maude GALLAGHER. You can shag vampire boy LATER. We are GOING OUT. It is your BIRTHDAY. There’s a DJ and we’ve never really been out dancing before and that’s essentially CRIMINAL. I will curse you if I must. I swear it.”

Sighing, I turned to Tom once again, noting that the shirt material was actually rather iridescent as opposed to just black metallic. My eyes closed and my chin fell to my chest as I responded.

“Fine. Fine. Let’s go dancing. But I think we should take separate vehicles.”

Luke cleared his throat. “I hate to be an utter downer, but you’re our designated driver, Maude.”

Eyes still shut, I rested both hands on Tom’s shoulders. “Right. Designated driver. Okay. I can handle this.”

Tom’s arms wound around my waist as he whispered quietly in my ear. “I can’t. I’m on the verge of fucking you right here, right now, right in front of them.”

In reply I ran my tongue along his jaw, not expecting the makeup to be quite so…vile. My eyes flew open as I shook my head back and forth, tongue still sticking out, as if that would help even remotely. “Bleech. That is…man, that tastes HORRIBLE.” He responded by biting my neck, and as I felt the tips of the fangs sinking into my soft flesh I pushed back and away. “Thomas. No. No no no no no. Honey. No.”

As he chuckled I grabbed my phone and keys from the dresser, handed them to him since he had pockets in which to store them, then headed for the door.

“Come on, let’s do this before I change my mind. And you’d better move your asses, because if we aren’t on our way to the lobby in the next twenty seconds it’s game over. I mean it.”

****************************************

Tom had followed me down the stairs, muttering to himself the entire time, eventually jogging down to be by my side as I tried to focus so I wouldn’t fall and maim myself permanently. His right arm linked with my left, steadying me, voice even with a hint of incredulity.

“Lady Loki.”

I nodded. “That’s me. Were you surprised?”

“I fear may never recover from the shock, actually. Luke told me you were dressing as Loki. He left out the ‘lady’ bit.”

A very indelicate snort escaped me. “Lady bit. Lady bits. Heh. Wait, Luke told you?”

“Believe me, it took a considerable amount of effort to even get that much out of him.” His hand squeezed my forearm. “You knew who I was going to be, though.”

“Why would you think that?”

He grinned. “You didn’t faint when you saw me.”

“My, my…what a large ego you have there, Hiddleston.”

“Matches my…”

“Shut. It. And yes, I knew…but all I managed to ascertain from Simon was that you’d be turning up as Lestat, so I didn’t know WHICH Lestat.” I stopped in my tracks, three steps from the lobby floor, as I realized I hadn’t given him a complete once-over yet. His pants were black leather, but a matte finish, as were his boots, the toes squared off, and around his neck was a Sid Vicious-style padlock choker…not an official accessory, but damn, I loved it. “I’d ask if that was the actual Queen of the Damned costume but you’re four inches taller than Stuart Townsend and the pants aren’t short so…” His abs through the shirt were downright obscene, and the waistband of the trousers was low…so, so low…leaning in, I could see not only his entire happy trail but a sneaky peek of the top of his pubic thatch poking out as well. “Okay, I might faint now. Rock God Lestat equals too much hotness for poor old Lady Loki.”

His arm unlinked from mine and slipped around my waist, spurring the completion of our descent and walk toward the exit. “Ah, that’s better. That sort of compliment makes the thought of wearing leather pants to go out dancing in Hawaii much more palatable.”

“Caution is advised, Thomas. Can’t have you chafing anything and ruining my fun.”

We decided to take the Jeep…’decided’ meaning my stating that since I wasn’t drinking, I was driving whatever I wanted. Tom offered to take the wheel for the drive there, and as Simon bitched about how horrific it was to have to climb into the back seat of a Wrangler while wearing a robe I leaned back against the hood area of the passenger side. Tom, waiting for the clown circus to cease so he could tuck me safely inside the vehicle, looked me up and down repeatedly.

“Maude…honestly…you are so, so sexy in that get-up…a level of sexy that should likely be illegal.”

I lifted my arms above my head, feigning a stretch, watching his jaw clench as I wiggled my fingers high above. “Misdemeanor or felony?”

He growled as his head tilted to the left. “Woman. Get in the Jeep.” A slap on my ass as I climbed aboard made me shriek with delight, and another one followed immediately, harder, and I moaned softly for the sole purpose of torturing the poor man, smirking as I heard him mutter ‘bloody fucking hell’ under his breath.

Rob’s Bar and Grill was eight miles from the hotel, and on the twenty-minute drive my gaze moved from my ring, to Tom, back to my ring, then back to Tom, again and again. This beautiful man beside me, currently a living, breathing incarnation of my most favorite fictional character, wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. His life. With me. Us. Together. Which we’d both already known, but somehow, having a circle of silver with a stone in it on my finger made it REAL. We hadn’t been alone since he proposed, and my mind was scrambling to think of exactly how to convey how much everything he’d done today meant to me, but kept coming up blank. The words I wanted wouldn’t fall into place, only floating around my head, scrambling away as I reached out to grab them.

The parking lot was nearly full, but Tom found an out of the way place perfect for a Jeep near the very back. We walked in, four unrecognizable people merging into a crowd of a hundred or more of the same. I hadn’t thought about it until that moment, but tonight, no one had a clue who we were, any of us. Granted, if someone was a huge fan they’d know Tom upon close inspection, but at a glance…no way. For him, it was probably a very freeing feeling…but for me, it was license to behave badly on the dance floor. Dancing Queen was cranking on the sound system, the giant wall of televisions displaying an endless array of sporting events, and Simon immediately bolted for the bar, Luke in tow. I turned my head to meet Tom’s gaze.

“Do you require a beverage as well, or shall we just get down to it, Mr. Hiddleston?”

He took my hand and pulled me out onto the dance floor, wiggling his hips seductively as we worked our way through the crowd. “Down to it, if you please.”

My brows rose as we found our place and he faced me, then placed a hand on my lower back, pulling my hips in to meet his own. “Oh, I please. Do do that voodoo that you do, baby.”

Luke and Simon joined us midway through the next song, Calvin Harris’s Feel So Close, and we all lost ourselves in the music, dancing with abandon to Lean On, Connected, 1999 and Brick House before I needed to take a bathroom and soda break. Not dipping my costume in the bowl was a challenge, but I figured I’d continue to make it through the night unscathed since I wasn’t getting hammered, as long as I remembered LIFT came before SIT. The music was too loud for conversation, so we stood together between the bar and the DJ, admiring all the creative costumes. There were superheroes, of course, Superman, Batman and the Joker among them, along with werewolves, Dracula-styled vampires, zombies, witches, a ballerina, a Playboy bunny, someone who was either dressed as Weird Al or was actually Weird Al, and my personal favorite, an older couple with the woman in costume as Jimmy Buffett and the man as a giant margarita glass, complete with salt on the rim.

When Wonderful Night by Fatboy Slim began to play, we ditched our drinks and wormed our way back into the middle of the dance floor, and as I watched Tom gyrating and spinning and jumping I was reminded of how music was such a powerful force in both our lives, how it moved us, allowed us to express our own through someone else’s words…and in that moment, I thought of THE song, the one that could say for me all the things my mind couldn’t seem to put to order as yet. As Wonderful Night finished, I yelled in Tom’s ear.

“I’m going to see if the DJ takes requests, okay? Be right back.”

As I walked to his table, he looked up, saw me, then looked back down and began typing on his phone. Upon reaching him, I bent down and shouted above the din of Cotton Eye Joe, which, frankly, I was thrilled to me missing out on.

“Hi there! Love your set so far…I was wondering…do you take requests?”

He nodded, stood, then motioned for me to follow him into the kitchen, where it was insanely busy but much quieter. Shorter than me, native Hawaiian if I had to guess, slightly overweight with dark hair back in a ponytail and tucked under his backwards baseball cap, dressed in a black Walking Dead T-shirt and white board shorts, a huge smile lit up his face and made me smile in return.

“For you? I absolutely do. Especially if you promise to keep dancing. You and your fiancé are the life of this party, man.”

My head tilted to the side, and he laughed heartily, extending his hand. “I’m Sammy Hale, otherwise known as All Hale the DJ. My wife Melanie is a huge fan, of you and Tom both. You should have heard her screeching when she saw his Tweet earlier…heck, maybe you DID. It was that loud.”

I laughed as well, accepting his proffered hand and shaking vigorously. “Maude Gallagher. But you knew that already. So, you recognized Tom? Nicely done.”

“Do you have any idea how many pictures of that man I’ve seen? But honestly, I knew who you were first, and once he started dancing I was sure it was him. She shows me videos, too. Congratulations, by the way. Here, look at what she posted on Facebook when she found out.”

He handed me his phone, and I focused in on the screen.

“Tom and Maude just got engaged right here on the island…I’m so happy for them! What an exciting time! And imagine…what if they decide to get married here? Even crazier, what if they choose my place for the reception? I’m such a hopeless dreamer, LOL.”

Eyes wide, I returned my gaze to Sammy. “Her place?”

“Well, it’s not really her place…but she’s been there since college so it feels like it is, I guess, plus she’s very passionate about her job…she’s the head event coordinator at the Coconut Beach Marriott.”

“Seriously?”

He nodded. “It’s a beautiful hotel, perfect setting, amazing beach…”

“Oh, I’m aware. That’s where we’re staying.” I pulled up his contacts, which was probably rude, but when fate intervenes you have to set such things as. “This is my personal cell number. Will you have her call me, please? We are getting married on Kauai, and the Marriott never crossed my mind as a reception location until right now. June 29th, 2016…that all needs to be kept under wraps, though…”

He looked shell-shocked as I handed him back his phone. “She has prior experience with celebrity weddings that required thorough confidentiality. Wow. This is…this is off the hook. It’s going to take me a good while to convince her I’m not yanking her chain when I tell her.”

Hand on my hip, I pointed at him. “Tell you what…Tom and I will do a video hello for her to send first so she knows for sure you met us, then you can break the news later. Sound good?”

His head shook back and forth slowly. “Sometimes, the universe just sets such amazing things you never expected right in front of you…”

“HA! Tell me about it. So…about my requests…” I provided him with my short list of songs, then revealed my plan, which he seemed nearly as excited about as I was. I went out and brought Tom into the kitchen to film our video hello for Melanie, who was, we were told, out trick or treating with their three little ones, ages eight, five and two. Once it was sent off, it was back to dancing. And, for me, waiting, riddled with anxiety and wondering if I’d be able to pull off what I’d decided to do without fucking it up too badly.

I lost track of time and space, especially after being whirled around to You Should Be Dancing, and how many songs had played between that and Poison by the Prodigy, I had not a clue…but that song and the one after were my cues, and I was at once grateful to have recognized the first but terrified that it was almost…time. Tom grinned fiendishly when he heard the opening notes, and we danced separately at first, him pausing during one section where the beat allowed me to do some hula-like hip shaking, then spinning me around so he could grind up against me until it was over. That was followed Steve Aoki’s Freak, during which I fully exercised my right to behave badly. Very, very badly, rubbing my scantily clad nether region up and down his leather covered thigh, bending over in front of him, his hands on my hips as he bucked against me, grabbing my ass occasionally, ending with his turning me back towards him and lifting my leg up so I could wrap it around his waist. After the last beat, I pulled away from him and headed once again to the DJ table, and Sammy handed me a microphone. Several deep breaths later in the strange silence, I began.

“Um, hi. Terribly sorry to interrupt the tunes, but…” I pointed at Tom, whose makeup had begun to run just a tiny bit, hair damp with sweat, body glistening with it as well, standing and staring at me with an expression of puzzlement upon his face. “That beautiful man right there…a few hours ago, he proposed to me in the most spectacular way possible.”

The crowd cheered and I held up my left hand, waggling my fingers. “Of course I said YES.” Everyone laughed, and I honed in on him, everything else becoming a blur. “Tom, I love you. So much. You…you are my everything. What you did for me today, how much my life has changed since we met here, on this island, back in June…I can never seem to find the right words to properly convey how it’s made me feel. So, I’m going to use someone else’s. And I’m going to sing them, because I think you kind of like it when I sing.”

The crowd had cleared around him, and he’d come closer, now standing six feet away, and as he nodded I could see his eyes had filled with tears. The song began to play, Flyleaf’s All Around Me, which was probably unknown to most of the folks at Rob’s, and perhaps to Tom as well…but it was perfect, and I sang along with Lacey Sturm, though Sammy had muted her vocals down to what essentially amounted to background noise.

“My hands are searching for you My arms are outstretched towards you I feel you on my fingertips My tongue dances behind my lips for you This fire rising through my being Burning I’m not used to seeing you I’m alive, I’m alive I can feel you all around me Thickening the air I’m breathing Holding on to what I’m feeling Savoring this heart that’s healing My hands float up above me And you whisper you love me And I begin to fade Into our secret place The music makes me sway The angels singing say we are alone with you I am alone and they are too with you I’m alive I’m alive I can feel you all around me Thickening the air I’m breathing Holding on to what I’m feeling Savoring this heart that’s healing So I cry (Holy) The light is white (Holy) And I see you I’m alive I’m alive I’m alive And I can feel you all around me Thickening the air I’m breathing Holding on to what I’m feeling Savoring this heart that’s healing Take my hand I give it to you Now you own me All I am You said you would never leave me I believe you I believe I can feel you all around me Thickening the air I’m breathing Holding on to what I’m feeling Savoring this heart that’s healed”

As was my habit, I lowered my chin to my chest once I finished. I knew I’d struggled with a few bits that were at the upper edge of my range, but to my ear, at least, it had sounded okay overall. When I raised my head up, I saw Tom, openly weeping and rushing towards me, wrapping his arms around me and burying his face in my neck as the crowd began to applaud and cheer. I rubbed his back as he murmured words of thanks and adoration in my ear, finally pulling back to look into my eyes.

“Pretty sure I already knew it, but now it’s completely crystal clear to me…asking you to be my wife was by far the smartest decision I’ve ever made, and likely ever WILL make. Thank you, for saying yes, for being willing to spend the rest of your life with me, ME, for loving me, and for that song. I will never forget this day, this hour, this moment…my god, how I love you…”

I poked his shoulder. “Dude. Shush. You’re totally stealing my thunder.”

We both laughed, and when we heard ourselves do so over the sound system, it dawned on me that the mic was still hot, and I brought it up to my lips again.

“Well, now you know why I had to resort to singing, right?” The crowd erupted in laughter as I flicked the off switch, and seemingly out of nowhere Luke and Simon arrived, embracing Tom and I from either side. Simon’s wig was mildly askew, and I made a huffing noise.

“Um, Simon…did you, like HEAR me sing or were you, like, BUSY?”

A rare blush spread across his cheeks. “So, who’s ready to head back to the hotel?”

Luke was red as a beet as well, and I snorted.

“I’m not sure whether I should be pissed or proud. How about I decide on the ride?”

They bolted towards the door, and Tom took my hand, leading me outside and to the Jeep without another word.

****************************************

The relative silence continued as I drove, just the noise of the wind, all of our windows rolled down to let in the night air. We said our goodnights in the hallway, and as soon as the door closed behind us Tom had me up against the wall, a sense of deja vu washing over me. His mouth found mine, tongue thrusting in roughly, groaning as I bit down on it gently before sucking firmly. Moving my head the way I wanted was entirely too challenging with the horns on, so I yanked them off and tossed them across the room, along with the arm wraps. He buried one hand in my fake hair, and I could feel him fumbling behind me with the other, searching for the bra clasp. I grabbed his arms, pulled them in front of me, then placed his hands on my breasts, hoping he’d get the hint. Instead, he opted to show off his motorboating skills, followed by testing his fangs, dragging them back and forth across my still-covered nipples.

“Fuck. Tom. Front. It’s in the front. Take it off. OFF.”

A moment passed as he pondered the mechanics of the thing, followed by my boobs springing free as he slid the straps off my shoulders, down my arms, off my wrists, pulling it from behind me and finally dropping it unceremoniously onto the carpet. The right nipple was his first target, laving it with his tongue, sucking it into his mouth, then biting it gently until I swatted him away, at which point he switched to the left one. Using his hands, he pressed my breasts together, tongue sliding back and forth quickly from nipple to nipple, my head flopping back against the wall, eyes closed. Suddenly, he was gone, and when I opened my eyes he was staring at the belt, and when the latch that closed it couldn’t be easily located, he forced the belt and attached fabric over my hips, taking the booty shorts along with it, tapping first one leg, then the other, prompting me to lift each in turn so he could slip the shorts over my boots and move the belt out of the danger zone.

I watched as his eyes roamed over me, standing naked but for my thigh-high boots, and I could see he was rock hard right through the leather. Reaching out, I lifted the hem of his shirt and yanked upward, and he lifted his arms, licking his lips, eyes rolling back into his head as I paused to flick his nipples with my tongue. He stepped back, completing the removal of the shirt himself, grunted, then rotated me roughly until I was facing the wall. It was then that he spoke his first words, other than wishing Simon and Luke a good night, since we left the bar.

“Arms above your head, all the way up. Hands on the wall.” Short, curt, and nearly a growl. I complied, moaning as his hands grasped my inner thighs, pushing outward, indicating that I should spread my legs. I complied with that, as well, hearing the sound of a snap coming undone and zipper being pulled as I moved. His cock dripped into the crack of my ass as he gauged our alignment.

“That’s it. Just like that. Don’t move a muscle.”

His left hand wrapped around my wrists, holding them to the wall, and with his right he guided himself to my entrance, just the tip of him nudging inside. As I began to push backward, the same hand moved first to stroke my belly, then downward, his middle finger reaching into my folds to circle my clit as he thrust forward, my hips hitting the wall as he slid home. He’d left just enough room to allow his finger to continue its stroking, but left me no way to move, pinned in place hanging on his cock. And because apparently that wasn’t enough torture, that’s when his fangs sank into my neck, causing me to orgasm without even the slightest warning, clamping down on him, desperate for friction but unable to attain it.

“Oh god oh my god ohmygod Tom…I need…need…you…move…you have to move. MOVE. Please. PLEASE.”

He ignored me, focused intently on my neck, biting, sucking and finally licking the spot he was finished with, then moving on to another. That pain, mingled with the pleasure originating from his consistently stroking finger, drew me to the brink, easing off whenever his mouth relocated, and just when I was ready to begin to genuinely protest against his edging, he began circling his hips in time with his finger.

“Is that better, Maude? Need my cock in motion, do you? Need to feel it rubbing against every bit of you, pressing against your walls, round and round we go, where we stop, nobody knows?”

“Fuck off.”

He stopped moving.

“Okay, fine. How about fuck ME instead?”

Nothing but stillness. Even his finger had ceased its ministrations.

“Thomas.”

Nada. Time to break out the big guns, then. Fulfilling, months later, a request he’d made back in New Orleans. I started to sing Closer.

“You let me violate you, you let me desecrate you You let me penetrate you, you let me complicate you Help me I broke apart my insides, help me I’ve got no soul to sell Help me the only thing that works for me, help me get away from myself”

He swallowed, hard enough that I could feel it against my back. I continued.

“I want to fuck you like an animal I want to feel you from the inside I want to fuck you like an animal My whole existence is flawed You get me closer to god”

He began moving again, but much faster, adding thrusts to his circling.

“You can have my isolation, you can have the hate that it brings You can have my absence of faith, you can have my everything Help me tear down my reason, help me its’ your sex I can smell Help me you make me perfect, help me become somebody else”

When I got to the word ‘perfect’ he groaned, loud and long and full of neediness, almost throwing me off my tempo as he let go of my wrists, pulled out of me and spun me around.

“I want to fuck you like an animal I want to feel you from the inside”

He lifted my left leg by the back of the knee, holding it aloft and allowing me to wrap it around his waist as he shoved himself back into me, eyes on mine, wild, pupils fully blown, jaw clenched, tips of the fangs resting on the edge of his lower lip. I leaned back against the wall, his weight pinning me again as I lifted the other leg and wrapped it around his waist as well.

“I want to fuck you like an animal My whole existence is flawed You get me closer to god”

He began slamming into me, pulling out, then slamming in again, our gazes still locked, my hands clenched together behind his neck. I leaned forward to run my tongue across his lips.

“That’s it. Come on. Fuck me.”

His breathing was labored, his reply more of a grunt as he moved faster and faster. “Like. An. Animal.”

“Mmm hmm. Just like that.” I began bucking against him as his finger found my clit again. “More. Harder. More. Make me scream.”

He lowered his head, breaking eye contact in order to sink his teeth into the unmarked side of my neck, and that’s when, I did, in fact, scream. Entirely too loudly for well past 9 PM, even on a Saturday. The bite grew ever harder as he stifled his own scream, spurting inside me as my walls convulsed around him, finally letting go just as I thought the skin would break.

We stilled, coming down, without separating. He leaned back a bit, inspecting his work.

“Well. That…I…lord, are you all right?”

I snorted. “I think it probably looks worse than it feels.”

“I sincerely hope that’s the case. Sorry, love. You singing to me in conjunction with watching nearly every man in that bar gawking at you resulted in my feeling incredibly…territorial.”

“Men were gawking at me?”

Both eyebrows shot up. “You didn’t notice?”

I shook my head. “That’d be a big ‘ole NOPE. Probably because that, like, never happens. And don’t be sorry. I spent a good portion of the evening relishing how those fangs felt on my neck and dying for…more.” A huge grin spread across my face. “I adore your feeling territorial…like you enjoyed my jealousy, I suppose. Next time if the urge to shout ‘Stop ogling my girlfriend you blood louts!’ arises, I totally won’t hold it against you if you succumb to it.”

“Fiancée.”

After unwinding my legs one at a time and ensuring the solidity of my feet on the floor, I removed my hands from behind his neck and stared at my ring as he slipped out of me. “Fiancée. By the time I’m used to saying that, it’ll be ‘wife’.”

He kissed the tip of my nose. “But that will be the only other name you’ll ever have to get used to. Well, except for mum…”

I looked down at myself, naked but for the boots and the ring, and began to giggle.

A smile spread across his face. “What’s so funny?”

“Nothing, really. Just that there’s a man in leather pants, wearing a blond wig and sporting vampire teeth with his cock hanging out, talking to a woman wearing only thigh-high lace-up leather boots, an engagement ring and a smile about…about…” My giggles turned into chortling. “KIDS. About having kids. And I can’t help but see it…us, when we’re like, fifty, sneaking into a bedroom late at night, neglecting to lock the door and a Hiddlespawn wandering in and seeing us…like this…ohmygod…”

He threw back his head, laughing that infectious laugh that was uniquely his. “We’ll just explain that sex is a natural thing, that it’s a wonderful, beautiful expression of love between two people and that sometimes…”

“Bwhahahaha! SOMETIMES, kid, you inadvertently discover that your parents are kinky as fuck when you don’t KNOCK before entering a room.”

After composing ourselves, we provided wig removal assistance for each other, then hit the shower. Tom got out before I did, and just as I finished drying off and putting on my robe there was a knock at the door. I turned to Tom, eyes wide.

“Christ, Simon and Luke have to be passed out by now for sure, so who the hell is THAT?”

He shrugged and answered it, his black shorts hanging low on his hips, and when the door closed he turned around, a covered dish in his left hand. He walked to the desk, set it down, and removed the lid, revealing a cheesecake topped with strawberries, a tiny Happy Birthday pick and six candles. I swiped the side of it with my index finger, then licked…and as soon as it hit my taste buds, I gasped.

“Hiddleston. That’s a Carnegie Deli cheesecake.”

Nodding, he leaned in to kiss my cheek. “Did you think I’d dare forget CAKE? Happy Birthday, Maude.”

I pinched his arm. Hard. He jumped, squealing. “Sorry. I just needed to make sure you were real. So now I have confirmation of that, which is cool. But a real…what? That’s the question. Because you CANNOT be human. And…whatever it is that you are…how is it that you’re…mine?”

His arms wrapped around my waist from my left side, chin on my shoulder. “I hope you realize that I ask myself those same questions. Repeatedly. And, I think in order to answer them, we have to consider that…maybe…maybe apart, we’re human…but together, we’re something that transcends that, those earthly, tangible limitations.”

“Huh. You know what? I think that together…that something…it manifests itself as human again. That’s…it’s…that’s…children.”

A sharp intake of breath from him, followed by a gentle kiss on my neck. “I believe you’re on to something there, my love.”

Twisting my head so I could meet his gaze, I winked. “I believe I totally one-upped you there, my love.”

He laughed. “Oh, you most definitely did. I’m impressed.”

“Heh. Prepare to be even more thoroughly impressed as I devour this entire cheesecake.”

His nose nuzzled against my clavicle. “None for me?”

Sighing, I patted his arm. “Well, I suppose if you do a decent job of singing happy birthday you can have a slice. A SMALL slice…”

He lit the candles, sang it Hank style, and as I blew out the candles I realized that there really wasn’t anything left for me to wish for. Everything I could ever have wanted, or needed, was right there in that room, and as we gorged ourselves sitting out on the balcony, admiring the three-quarter moon reflecting on the water, the truth of the lyrics from the song I’d sung for him overwhelmed me, ‘I can feel you all around me, thickening the air I’m breathing, holding on to what I’m feeling, savoring this heart that’s healed’ and I leapt up from my chair and stood before him, taking his face in my hands, tilting his head upward as I spoke eight simple words that made us both weep.

“Thank you. For everything. I love you. Always.”

[riverchester]

Killer-Stuffed-Dinosaur In Love

(a 13x16 "Scoobynatural" Coda) - read also on AO3 

Even when yet another apocalypse is just around the corner, the events of their trip to the Scooby-Doo cartoon have a lasting effect on the boys. May it be a fond memory to put a smile on their lips or a piece of fabric that contributes to complete new developments.

Rating:  Teen And Up Audiences No Warnings Category: M/M Fandom: Supernatural Relationship: Castiel / Dean Winchester Characters: Dean Winchester, Castiel, Sam Winchester Additional Tags: Episode s13e16: Scoobynatural; Coda; Fluff; Love Confessions; Making Out; Language: English

Blood of the most holy man – check. Fruit from the tree of life – check. Archangel grace – … still to be found.

Sam, Dean, and Cas don’t even have the slightest clue where to search for Lucifer. It’s like he has fallen off the face of the earth – and yes, they actually considered this option. In fact, the more days pass, the more viable it seems that maybe, somehow, Lucifer found a way open the rift and get back to the other dimension. Or maybe he’s just stuck again in one of Colonel Sander’s cells. Because let’s be honest, if he and that other angel would still be running around freely, they would’ve heard of them by now, right?

Sam sits at the table in the war room, hacking something on his laptop – as always – and Dean downs one beer after another while reading through some lore that probably doesn’t even have one hint – as always – when Cas comes down the stairs of the bunker after yet another shot at finding his absent brother.

“Well, your body language speaks volumes, Cas. Let me guess, nothing?” Dean says, stretching his arms over his head. Really, they need a break.

“Nothing, nada, rien, nichts,” Cas sighs, slumping into a chair “I don’t understand it, I searched every place. I actually consider contacting other angels to see if they can help. Although I can imagine they won’t be too excited.” The angel massages his temples as if he has a headache. A very human habit, considering he doesn’t feel that sort of pain.

“Probably not,” Sam says, rubbing his eyes, “but we need every bit of help we can get.”

The loud thud of Dean closing the books in front of him has Sam and Cas turn to him. “No, what we really need, like right now, is a break.”

“Dean – ” Sam starts, but he doesn’t get as far as a second word, because his brother interrupts immediately, raising his hands in defense.

“I get it, Sam, I do. Believe me, I wanna get mom back as soon as possible, and Jack too. I know I was pretty hard on that kid at first, but he’s family. Damn, he already tried so often to save our asses and help us with mom, how could I not see him as a Winchester? And I also know that we have to be quick to stop this Michael 2.0., but look at us,” he gestures wildly between himself and the other men to prove a point, “Sam, when was the last time you looked at something else than the screen of your damn PC? You can hardly keep your eyes open, they must hurt like a bitch. I start reading the same paragraphs over and over again because I just can’t concentrate anymore, the words are swimming before my eyes. And Cas doesn’t exactly look peachy either.”

“I am an angel, I don’t need – ” Cas starts, but again, Dean doesn’t want to hear a word.

“Yeah, I know man, but come on, the last weeks strained your mojo a lot. Don’t act as if it is nothing, cause I saw you napping at the kitchen table. And if I learned one thing in the ten years that I deal with angels, it’s that sleep never means something good for you guys.”

With his arms crossed, Dean sits and waits for a snarky reply, but his brother and best friend just look at each other for a second before they give up and sigh exhaustedly.

“Okay, maybe you’re right,” Sam says, shifting his weight on the chair he sits on for eight hours straight by now, “maybe we really could use a break.”

“Good. So, I’d say you hit the sack and I go for a food run. I wanna eat something real again and not this microwave crap. I’m gonna make chili for dinner. Hot, rich, and spicy. It will get our circulation going.” Dean stands up and the joints in his legs creak. He really could use some time under the hot spray.

“I can join you, if you want,” Cas says to Dean as the hunter grabs his keys from the table.

“Sure.”

“Could you two maybe grab some stuff for smoothies then?” Sam asks, already yawning.

“Okay, but don’t expect me to mix you this stuff. It’s violation of fruits and you know it. Really, apples belong in a pie!” Dean gruntingly says.

Without another word, Sam disappears in direction of his bedroom, while Cas already makes his way over to the garage. Dean stretches and flexes his arms one more time before he follows the angel. They’ve been cooped up in this place for too long. Not that the bunker isn’t a nice place to live in, but even the nicest place can give you cabin fever after a while. The drive to the store will hopefully help him to blow the cobwebs away.

Behind the steering wheel, Dean feels already better. The sound, the smell, and the vibration of his Baby never fail to soothe him. Out on the road, he cranks down the window to feel a bit of the airstream in his hair, and Cas emulates.

“I’m sorry, Dean. I shouldn’t have let Lucifer get away in the first place, then we wouldn’t be in this situation now.”

“Cas, this is not your fault.”

After a minute of silence, the angel mumbles, “I’m still sorry.”

Dean sighs. “Could you please stop apologizing for it?” God, when did this become so awkward?

They are still in somewhat of a process of getting comfortable and natural around each other again, after yet another death, yet another time of being forcefully separated from each other and not knowing how the other is. They’ve done it plenty of times over the last years, but it’s an ever-continuing process nonetheless, and it doesn’t get easier.

The hunter can see his best friend eyeing the ascot that he knotted around the rearview mirror. “Sam told me it looks weird to wear it, so I put it up there. In memory of our little adventure,” he says, side-eyeing the angel to wait for any sort of reaction.

“It… didn’t look weird,” Castiel answers carefully after a while.

Dean yanks his head in the other man’s direction, surprised by the answer. “Really?”

“Really,” Cas says. He stares at Dean for a second, before his averts his gaze and looks out of the window. “I mean, it was not what one would call your ‘usual style’, but it was very obvious how much fun you had in the cartoon, and how much you care for these little reminders. I like seeing you happy.”

The hunter stares at the road in front, hoping that the warm feeling in his cheeks doesn’t show on his face. He doesn’t even know what to answer. It’s always like that when Castiel, angel of the Lord, lets out a compliment or anything else slightly emotional in his direction. It still gets Dean every time.

“Ehm, thanks Cas,” he answers to not let the awkward silence drag on for any longer.

“I think I understand now what draws you to this cartoon. I already knew how much you like it before we got sucked into the television, but I never really paid attention on why. But I can imagine now, that as a child who got confronted with the supernatural from a very young age on, those stories were a secure place. You saw this group of people on the screen, who also fight monsters, but in the end, it turns out good. No one dies, and there is nothing to be afraid of in the long run.” The angel stays quite for a moment, as if considering something. “It must’ve been very important for you to have this sort of escape, if only for the length of an episode, once in a while.”

Dean feels a lump forming in his throat. He knew this, sure, but no one ever spoke it out loud, no one ever put it together this simple. And of course, Cas did it. His always curious, billions of years old angel, who gets fascinated by things as cereals and foosball, might have problems at times with slang or social interactions, but he never fails to amaze Dean with his train of thoughts.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right,” he answers, although he would like to say more. He would like to say “thank you”, he would like to say something smart, but to be honest, he also just wants to grab this guy and kiss the shit out of him.

It’s not like Dean doesn’t know about his feeling for his best friend, he knows it very well. How can a guy not, if the face of his angel friend is the picture that follows him into his dreams at night, or if the tingly feeling on his skin whenever they touch stays for hours? And even if Dean might be too naïve or suppressing to figure it out with that, the boner he’s sported on several occasions is not exactly a thing to ignore. But he also knows that neither him or Cas are well known for having luck in their lives, especially considering romantic interests, so to make the first step, to actually act on those feelings, is more than he can usually handle.

Their shopping trip is quick and efficient because Dean knows his chili recipe by heart and Cas gratefully undertakes the task of selecting fruits and veggies for Sam. It’s a nice and utterly normal activity, to go grocery shopping together; Dean would even call it domestic and he enjoys this togetherness while walking up and down the aisles and adding things to their cart. They don’t even have to talk much, that was never their thing anyway. It was always more staring than words, but somehow they get along with it quite well. Maybe it’s this ‘more profound bound’ thing that Cas talked about. Dean always wondered what that exactly meant.

The drive back home is comfortable and Dean turns up the volume to sing along the radio. Out of the corner of his eyes, he watches Cas drum with his fingers to the beat. God, how he loves those little gestures of the angel. He grins from ear to ear and lays off the gas pedal a bit, just to have a minute or two more with the other man. But Lebanon is tiny and although the bunker is hidden outside the town, they arrive back in the garage sooner than Dean would’ve liked. Not that he doesn’t feel comfortable around Cas when they’re in the bunker, but in Sam’s presence, he’s far more aware of what he’s doing and how he acts around the angel. Which is stupid because his giant moose brother would be the last person to judge him. On the road, however, he feels a bit more confident – at least in his head. Out on the road, he sometimes has the feeling like he might have the guts to make a move.

The garage door closes, and Dean shuts down the engine. Without the constant background noise of his Baby, it’s dead silent. Before he can get as far as touching the handle of the driver’s door, he can see Cas starting to fumble with the ascot. Dean squints his eyes and watches his best friend untying the knot and carefully straightening the fabric in his lap.

“Cas, what – ” Dean starts but immediately shuts his mouth again when Cas crawls over to his side of the bench and places the ascot around his neck. The hunter shudders at the feeling of Cas’ fingers on his skin, and they are so close, that he has nothing but the angel in his field of vision, nothing but his best friend’s breath that sounds in his ears.

Cas takes his time with tying the fabric and Dean holds his breath the whole time. Every muscle in his body is tensed and the thoughts running through his mind make his head spin. How can the guy smell so amazing?

After what feels like an eternity, the angel straightens the perfect knot one last time and whispers, still close to Dean’s face “It suits you.” Then he is about to lean back, to take his hands away from the hunter’s body, but Dean reacts out of instinct and grabs for Cas’ wrist, holding him in place.

“Dean?”

He hears it, the gravelly voice calling his name, but he’s like in trance. That’s exactly what he was afraid of, acting without thinking and then not having a clue how to proceed. He can’t go further, but he can’t let Cas go and pretend as if nothing happened either. So he just stares. They’re Cas and Dean so staring is their thing, right? In fact, he knows that he’s pleading, that he looks desperate and if this bond between them truly exists, he hopes that Cas gets it and will interpret it right.

And boy, does he interpret it right. The first touch of lips on lips is careful and reserved, their mouths barely brushing against each other. But once this hurdle is cleared, they only separate for Dean to breathe. And they still try to get closer, with Cas fisting the ascot and Dean reciprocating by grabbing for the angel’s tie. His back is pressed against the driver’s door, but although the handle is a bit uncomfortable, Dean can’t stop grinning against the kisses. Turns out, he wasn’t the only one needy to get this on the road. They grasp and touch and kiss, and slowly get from a sitting to a more lying position, with Cas on top; not at all surprising for Dean.

Their breath fogs the inside of the Impala and it’s pretty obvious that they either need to stop soon or lose some clothes and move to the backseat. Dean is torn between both possibilities. On the one hand, he already feels the familiar spark pooling deep inside his body, ready to go further, but on the other hand, it’s also too much at once. This is Cas, not some random girl from a bar. He deserves something special, and although the thought of sex with Cas in his Baby has Dean moaning against the angel’s mouth, their first time should be different. They should be able to fall asleep next to each other… or at least Dean.

He puts one hand flat against Cas’ chest and breaks their kiss. The angel’s grumpy moan makes it obvious that he’s not amused by this, but he reluctantly leans back and stares at Dean. He looks totally debauched, with swollen lips and lust-blown eyes, sweat forming on his forehead. Dean can only assume that he himself looks equally tousled.

“Dean?” There it is again, this one syllable that goes straight to Dean’s groin. He almost regrets his decision and thinks about just leaning in again, but his stomach uses the moment of silence between them to growl. Cas chuckles and Dean shrugs – a very awkward gesture in his position.

“Ehm… maybe I should start making dinner,” he says and the angel nods.

“Can I help you?”

“Sure.” They stay like this for another few moments, share another sweet kiss, and then straighten their clothes to look decent once they crawled out of the car.

In the kitchen, they stay as close as possible while washing, chopping, and cooking. Sometimes it’s their hips touching, sometimes their arms. One might let a finger trail over the other’s shoulder when they walk across the room. When the chili simmers on the stove, Cas crowds Dean against the counter and presses their bodies together. The hunter immediately looks to the door and Cas steps back, knowing his favorite human well enough to not risk him feeling uncomfortable.

“Sorry,” Dean mutters, looking at the ground.

“It’s okay, I understand.”

“No, you don’t,” the hunter adds, “I… I’m not ashamed of this,” he gestures between them, “and I don’t wanna hide it from Sam. I just… I don’t want to… well, tell him like this. I’m gonna talk to him.”

“You want to talk? By choice?”

“Yeah, I don’t know. Seems like being in love makes me sappy and talkative”

It takes Dean a moment to realize what he just said, and he’s already getting nervous again until he sees the huge grin on Cas’ face, who leans in and claims the other man’s mouth in a passionate, sweet and loving kiss. “I love you too.”

Their confessions and following making out is cut short when they hear a door opening and closing pretty loudly down the hall. Bless this bunker for the echoing corridors. “To be continued,” Cas whispers into Dean’s ear.

When Sam scuffs into the kitchen, they already set the table. Team Free Will sits down and enjoys the meal that turned out truly delicious. After his second serving, Sam shoves the bowl to the side and leans back in his chair, sighing in contentment.

“Really, Dean? The ascot again?”

Just then the older brother looks down at him and sees that he’s still wearing the piece of fabric. Before he can answer, though, Cas starts to speak and pats his hand under the table.

“Well, I can see why Daphne likes it.”

[sleepymarmot]

A couple of months ago, after finishing COUNTER/Weight, I spent about a week in a total hangover, relistening to scenes and having feelings. I took some notes, but procrastinated posting them, and then finally got distracted. But, a) I hate leaving things I intended for tumblr unposted, even if they have value only for me, and b) I also hate posting things out of order, and there's a big TM liveblog incoming. So, here's a bunch of really random thoughts about C/w from past me.

The gnosis virus did go nowhere huh. I was hopeful for a minute when one of the finale intros mentioned it, but that was it. What was the purpose of that arc even. [Note from present me: Lol. At least I feel better about this one!]

Oh, and the patch AuDy left never reappeared either. And the idea from the faction game that Aria's images owned by EarthHome/Petrichor transmit Rigour code… That's the flip side of the coin. On the one hand, it's really cool to see the creative process – on the other, it sometimes feels like you're listening to people write a script for the tv show, but only get to see a half of the finished product. It's fascinating to see the universe grow organically and the players to come up with new ideas and get excited about them – but that means numerous retcons, some of them not even presented as such, because the creators forgot what the previous revision was or didn't thought it was important. It's a unique feature of the medium that player choice directs the narrative and it's not bound by railroading – but that means some roads lead nowhere, and some branches dry and fall off.

It's a bit harder to make peace with something that could have easily been developed more within the existing plot of the show. How come there's a player character whose consciousness consists of three different people in various combinations, but nobody seems to be curious how that works? No PC or NPC ever asked “Which one of you is speaking right now?” or something. The final episodes made a lot of things clearer, but it still felt too little, too late. Hard not to be reminded of that gripe about certain two characters sharing one character sheet one of whom was left underdeveloped and half-forgotten… Both are very ambitious concepts that require a double amount of work from the player, so I feel bad complaining they weren't realized to full potential, but…

Speaking of L&D… I still want to know how the hell did that one engineer all by herself design 4 gods, one of which became a basis for technology that was advanced even for the civilizations 80,000 years later? This woman singlehandedly surpassed any technological achievement of humanity before and after. Who Is She

I saw a “Wake me up: before you go go / when september ends / wake me up inside” meme and thought “heh, this sounds relevant, which member of the Chime is which?” and it already made me sad, but then I realized that I'd never actually heard the september song and looked it up and. The lyrics fit so well. What the fuck. It's an old song everyone keeps joking about. Why is it appropriate for a legitimate fanmix. What. I guess the word “September” will never be the same again for me.

I looked up the rules for Firebrands, the game used for the finale. Oh my, challenges for the dance minigame are so overtly romantic when you see them in a list together! Imagine this cast of characters having to answer to “do you place your hand upon my elbow, shoulder, waist, or hip?” lmao. Also I didn't realize “May I?” was part of the rules for “stealing time together”. (And I found out there's a party version of that minigame with bug-themed challenges. I might have dug too deep…) "Tactical skirmish" is a really fascinating concept, I've never seen such a masochistic combat system! Really faces the player with the violence they're inflicting: sure, you can always fight on, but are you ready to live with what you'll have to do? But for it to work fully, you need a lot of non-expendable NPCs on both sides. The one with the most likeable team wins! (Like Mako did.)

I'm relistening to Three Conversations and it's pretty interesting that Ibex has a bunch perfectly lifelike android bodies, right? There is no such technology seen anywhere else. Did Righteousness develop and privatize that? Are they so complex that only a Divine would have enough computing power to successfully mimic organic life? Can Aria convince Righteousness to help her perform on stage without leaving her duties? Also, like with AuDy, I wonder how Ibex & Righteousness' consciousness works. Is it a single mind, spread across every body he has, or even anything Righteousness is running on, having a bunch of different conversations at once if he needs to? Or is the original Ibex just gone, and what's left is a personality imprint hanging on to the connection to his still living body, imitating his former self like the automated recording Cass saw wore his face? In other words, has Ibex completely fused with Righteousness, or assimilated and destroyed by it? Does he not exist anymore as an independent singular being, or does he not exist at all? Most info indicates the former, but there was also “You’re not in there anymore” “No”.

If Orth and Jace are anime fans with their Kingdom Come and Panther, then Ibex is the guy who's way too into dinosaurs or paleontology. It's as if the heads of various confessions were called Triceratops, Stegosaurus etc. and only one of them knows wtf that means, and also he compares his Divine to… Were there scavenging dinosaurs? I'm looking at an article that suggests T. Rex might have been a scavenger, so yeah he would compare Righteousness to a goddamn T. Rex.

Hey what do you think is the most thematically aproppriate part of the Hieron anime for Orth to watch alone at night during the Kingdom game. What's the best thematic parallel for when he turns off the episode and thinks he made a mistake. Do you think that he once, after a long day and a long month and maybe a long year of feeling helpless and doomed, sits down for a distraction but ends up sobbing “How could they let this happen to Mother Glory”

On Joypark, there are definitely statues of Eidolons, ancient and holy, that were repainted and repurposed as Hieron deities. Imagine a giant Greek or Roman style marble statue of Apote – and it’s painted over as Samot, with an anime face and in really bright plain colors like these “reconstructions of original coloring” that actually only use base colors so they look like cheap action figures.

I was reading Austin's top ten games of 2016 list on Waypoint and he gave first place to The Sprawl! Aww!

The Downloads folder in my phone gallery is funny bc it mostly consists of every freely available f@tt map and also that one photo of Tristan Walker (because I tried to redraw it, very unsuccessfully). I go check a map and every time am met by Ibex just. staring at me. It's unsettling

Some of the many options for how Apostolosian gender could have been presented:

Apostolosians prefer to be addressed by the most neutral available human pronoun, represented as "they" in English, because the human languages don't have anything close enough

Apostolosian pronouns are represented in English by a set of real-life common pronouns and neopronouns

There's a list of Apostolosian pronouns and they're just used in English verbatim (Really impractical because the players need a cheat sheet, but the most fair)

Humans apply human genders to Apostolosians. Apostolosians may be offended, may find it convenient, or something else

As Austin said in the post-mortem, the Eidolon system is not gender. It's represented in English by titles/honorifics/etc

Any of the above, and the creators are aware of the difference between personal pronouns, grammatical gender, and social gender

And that’s not even touching the core problem of what the concept of gender in a futuristic, techonologically advanced society would look like. Yes, I'm complaining about this for the third time but I'm just. So tired of native English speakers' takes on gendered language. They could have made Apostolosian gender look like anything and they made it look like that fucking mess... God, I really hope TM is good enough to make me forget and forgive the experience of listening to “he... sorry, they” for 100 hours. [Note from present me: Well… mostly]

Here’s my take on this: eidolons in Apostolosian language are absurdly broad noun classes with associated classifiers (which fits both the idea that they’re gender but not actually, and that each of them is a patron to several unrelated aspects of life) Apostolosian: the word “(Apo)thesa” is used to refer to people who follow the corresponding eidolon, as well as for counting buildings, heavy machinery, military units, specific strategies and tactics, log entries, historical documents and chronicles, history textbooks and monographs, and eras :) Human: what the fuck

Very critical, imaginative worldbuilding in which 80,000+ years into the future humanity somehow has 21st century gender and 21st century capitalism! TBH, I find any sci-fi set in the far future inherently silly – we can’t really imagine the future technogy and its effect on society. But it feels like C/w barely even tried, and to hear it boast about “critical worldbuilding” is kinda strange. I assumed that meant they build the world critically, not that they recreate modern society or some aspect of it and criticize that! It’s just another Star Trek then! And it was already clear right during the setup when they said “We don’t want Star Trek aliens” and immediately created Apostolosians.

I haven't seen a single piece of fanart with Taako and Mako. Come on, does nobody want to see these two next to each other! Especially considering the outfits artists like to put Taako in!

I really don't understand how and why people do fandom activities on Twitter and Discord where the creators also have accounts. It gives me so much secondhand embarrassment. I can barely peek at Twitter posts before running away. Old-fashioned opinion apparently but I strongly believe the main fandom space and the interaction-with-original-creators space should be separate. I need a space where I can voice my opinions, especially negative ones, with complete freedom. I need to be able to say exactly what's on my mind. But I wouldn't want any of the people on the podcast to read something unfiltered like my complaints above. Being in the same space as the source content creators obliges any decent person to be diplomatic and constructive. And the creators, in turn, need a space where they don't come across complete randos yelling at them about something they said in a podcast three years ago. I'm already feeling uncomfortable because hearing to strangers pour their hearts out for hundreds of hours gives me way too much insight on who they are as people. Of course, nothing’s stopping them from lurking on Tumblr or AO3 and even reading this very post, but a platform where they have official accounts is still a different thing! I even feel uncomfortable talking about the podcast creators using their first names so much. To my ear, referring to a total stranger by first name, especially if it's a shortened form, sounds so rude! I'm not their friend, I don't have that right! But, of course, writing something like “Mr Walker” in my liveblogs would have been even weirder, nobody does that...

Is it a common experience to not even think about fanfiction after listening to Hieron, but going straight to AO3 after C/w? I feel like since Hieron is still a work in progress, writing/reading about it is stepping on the GM&players' toes, and C/w is finished so it's like they gave us the keys to the playground, it's the fandom's turn now. This story has so much blanks and they must be filled! In one of the early episodes they joked that something cute they said would encourage people to ship Mako/Cass and I was like "Bold of you to assume they aren't already" and, indeed, I was right and it's the most popular C/w ship on AO3. Too bad I’m so indifferent to it…

It’s a shame we never had a full scene with Ariadne or even learned what they were up to during the finale.

I still don't understand how Ibex went from “evil CEO” to “leader of a proletarian revolution”, these sound like completely opposite concepts to me

I probably have talked about this too much and have pretty much given up on ever getting a clear picture due to all of these reimaginings but… Righteousness and Voice… Ibex takes Righteousness out of Mako but he still has Voice, that was pretty much openly stated, correct? So how does that work? I’m guessing Righteousness is hidden somewhere in Voice’s code. But if so:

Did Maryland know? On the one hand, she’s too competent not to. On the other, why would she ever allow or accept that?

How did Righteousness not get corrupted by Rigour too? Maybe it did, but broke off the connection with the rest of itself to contain the damage? Or maybe, on the contrary, it kept in contact and was sending intel to Ibex the whole time? But in that case he would have provided more help in the finale.

[grootiez]

The Joys of Raising a Teenaged Groot- Chapter 35: Reminiscence

After visiting hours were over, Rocket went back to the motel that he was staying at. He undressed himself, jumped into the shower, and got changed into his pajamas. After climbing into bed, the raccoon flipped through the channels on the ancient TV. (Of which there was only three, and they were all educational crap and none of those shows interested Rocket.) Rocket tries to hack the TV so that he could get some of the good channels and a little bit better reception so the picture wasn’t as grainy and staticky, but even that proved fruitless. He then got out his top-of-the-line gaming laptop and decided to at least play a couple of games he installed on his PC, but since he was on a different planet and the game, World of Warcraft, was on Terra, he would need a signal strong enough to carry  his wifi connection to Earth and back. Since the motel he was staying at had shoddy wifi at the best, playing the game, or even going on the internet was out of the question.

So the only option for Rocket was to rifle through the bag of old movies that he brought with him. After searching for something good to watch, he found nothing. But, as he looked in the bottom of the bag, he saw an old VHS tape labeled “Guardians Family Moments”.

“I-I don’t remember packing this in the bag...” Rocket was confused as to how the video tape ended up in his bag. He then remembered that Peter helped him with his bags to the car when it was time for the raccoon to move into temporary housing while Groot was being rehabilitated at the nursing home for an undetermined amount of time. “Star-Munch...” He whispered to himself as he held the tape.

The raccoon plopped the tape into the VCR and an old reel of various moments of the Guardians’ life as a newly formed team, and more importantly, a family played. There were touching moments of everyone, but Rocket payed close attention to the moments between him and Groot that were captured on camera.

The first scene was when Groot was reborn and started to move around. Rocket was so elated that he had his best friend back and vowed to protect him from any harm that befell him. The raccoon wishes that he was more protective over Groot, knowing what has happened to him in the last few months.

Rocket fast fowarded to the next part. This was when Groot was starting to mimic words and everyone was seated around the tiny twig inside of his pot, which was lovingly decorated by Rocket. Groot was trying his best and the Guardians were encouraging him to speak (although Peter was hoping that he would say something other than “I am Groot.” He was coaxing the tiny twiglet to say “Starlord is the best!”) At last the tiny Flora Colossus spoke.

“I... I... am... Groot!” Groot exclaimed as he held his tiny branch arms up towards Rocket, wanting the raccoon to pick him up.

As Rocket held the baby Flora Colossus in his arms, he couldn’t believe what Groot’s first word was.

“So, what did he say?” Peter impatiently asked. “It better have been ‘Starlord is the best uncle in the entire galaxy!’” He playfully teased Groot as the sapling tries to hide in Rocket’s fur for protection.

“He definitely didn’t say that, Star-Munch.” Rocket snarled at the Terran as he handed Groot off to Gamora.

“Then what was it, Rocket?” Gamora, who let Groot play with her hair asked as the baby giggled.

Rocket smiled as Gamora handed Groot back to him. “Dad.” The raccoon wiped a tear from his eyes as he looked at his son. “He called me ‘Dad.’”

Rocket reflects on this part. He knows that no matter how well Groot mastered the speech synthesizer, he’ll never hear his son say “Dad” in his own natural voice ever again.

The tape then showed Groot’s first steps. Rocket had set Groot’s pot on the counter, in order to give the tiny Flora Colossus a bath, even though Groot wanted cookies first. As soon as Rocket turned his back to check the water temperature in the sink that Groot was to be bathed in, the tiny tree extended his tiny arms to the shelf that the cookie jar was on and began to lift himself up to it. Unfortunately, Groot’s coordination wasn’t the best and his arms let go of the shelf as he slowly fell to the floor. Luckily, Gamora entered the kitchen at the right time as Groot was free falling to the ground in slow motion and caught him just before his pot hit the floor.

“Groot! Groot!” Rocket was frantic as he rushed over to Gamora, who held Groot’s pot with the twig in it, in her arms. “What the-. What the flark were you trying to do?”

“I am Groot!” Groot replied in his most adorable voice as Gamora handed him to Rocket.

“I told you that you would get some cookies after your bath, not before.” Rocket said as he caught his breath. Groot then got upset and began to cry. “No, no, Groot, I’m sorry that I said that. I just want you to be safe and happy.” The raccoon then proceeded to rock Groot back in forth in his arms. “I love you, son.”

Groot’s tears stopped, the tiny tree looking up at his father. Rocket felt Groot shift his weight in his pot. He mentions this to Gamora and they carry Groot over to the table.

As Gamora examines Groot’s roots underneath the soil, she sees something amazing. “Rocket.” She began as she shifted some of the dirt around so that he could get a better look. “Groot’s ready to come out of his pot. He has legs now.”

Rocket was happy. Groot has reached another milestone in his development, growing legs and being able to leave his pot and explore the environment around him for the first time. At first Groot was crawling on his hands and knees, just like any other toddler. But unlike other toddlers, Groot’s surroundings were filled with dangerous things. Everything that was normally found in family homes that was a potential safety risk to a now-mobile toddler was now within his reach. But unlike other families, the Guardians’ house was filled with other hazards, the most luring items in Rocket’s workshop, which contained various weapons, bombs, and DEATH BUTTONS that were especially tempting to Groot. After multiple failed attempts to keep Groot out of Rocket’s workshop, (neither their warnings or time outs worked on the little tree that was entering the Floral Colossi version of “The Terrible Twos.”) The only option was to babyproof (or in the Guardians’ case, “Grootproof”) the entire Milano, paying particular attention to the kitchen and bathroom cabinets, anywhere Groot could sneak off to or hide in without the Guardians knowing, and Rocket’s workshop. ESPECIALLY Rocket’s workshop, where any of the weapons, bombs, and DEATH BUTTONS could pose a danger, not only to the Guardians, but to the entirety of Xandar should Groot get his branches on one and ACCIDENTALLY activate it.

Well, the aforementioned “Grootproofing” was only successful for only a day. It didn’t take Groot long how to figure out how to undo the baby locks on the cabinet doors. He also discovered how to climb over the baby gates and various barriers that blocked him from having free range of the house. (All he had to do was extend his arms around to where he could hoist himself over the obstacles.) It took the toddler a little longer to figure out how to get into Rocket’s workshop, but when he did, the Guardians gave up their “Grootproofing” plan and settled on just HEAVILY SUPERVISING the tiny tree wherever he went in the house or on the Milano.

The next part of the video was Groot’s first day of preschool. The little guy was nervous as he clung tightly to Rocket’s jumpsuit as the raccoon carried his son to the preschool entrance. As soon as the duo approached the door (The other Guardians stood proudly as they watched father and son go up the steps of the preschool together.)

Rocket placed Groot on the ground as the tiny Flora Colossus looked around nervously as Rocket straightened up his school uniform that had the school seal of The Xandar Academy for Gifted and Exceptional Students emblazoned on the front pocket of his blazer jacket. “Hey, don’t be nervous, Groot. You’re going to have a lot of fun, meet new kids, and your teachers are going to teach you a lot.” He said as he knelt next to Groot and handed the toddler his Bob Ross backpack and his Limited Edition Bob Ross tin lunchbox.

Rocket smiled as Groot took ahold of the lunchbox and stared in amazement at the embossed impression of his idol, Bob Ross, on it. “You better cherish that lunchbox because it’s going to be your only lunchbox through school. I don’t want to hear you complain, you’re even going to carry that lunchbox with you through high school. Costing us 50,000 units just for a lunchbox with a flarkin’ humie on it. Well, at least he ain’t as ugly as Quill.”

Groot stared at Rocket in confusion. “I am Groot?” The toddler squeaked out as he put his backpack on.

Rocket took Groot’s hand into his own. “Nothing, Groot. You just think about meeting and making new friends.” He reassures his son as Groot’s one-on-one aide came out to greet them and talk to Rocket as she escorted the two to Groot’s preschool class.

Rocket remembered that day. Groot loved his teachers and his aide helped him feel less of an outsider and more like a typical kid. But all of that changed when Groot was in the fifth grade and his aide had to retire because she just turned 65. Rocket remembered the emergency meeting that he had with Groot’s teachers, the school headmaster, the school guidance counselor, Groot’s case manager, the special education department and the school’s speech pathologist. Since Groot was only able to say “I am Groot.” He needed his aide because she was one of the very few people that studied Groot’s species’ language and could translate Groot’s thoughts to everyone else. The headmaster explained to Rocket that they tried to find a new aide for Groot, but since he was the last of his kind, that the need to study his language wasn’t necessary. The school only had 3 options for Groot: homeschool him until his high school graduation, place him in the special education classroom, or give him a communication device so that he could convey his thoughts, although he would sound like a robot to everybody.

Rocket knew that if he homeschooled Groot, the Xandar Department of Child Services would show up at the Guardians’ house faster than a bolt of lightning as soon as they got word that Rocket was teaching Groot how to build various weapons, bombs, and Death Buttons. Rocket didn’t want to place his son into the special education class because Groot was already getting teased because no one could understand him without his aide being present. If he were to be put in the special education class, the teasing would increase tenfold and it would lead to god knows what for Groot. Also, another problem with Groot being placed in the special education class would be the pace of the curriculum. Groot is one of the smartest students in the school and to put him in a class where he wouldn’t be academically interested or challenged would bore Groot to death.

So the only option was to have Groot use the communication device. At first he didn’t like it mainly because none of the voices sounded like him and they all sounded like a robot, which started the bullying of him by the other kids in the school. He still refused to use it even when his case manager and the school’s speech therapist allowed Groot to take the device home in the hopes that he would get used to it and be more apt to communicate through it. But that didn’t make Groot more inclined to use it, especially since he had Rocket at home to translate for him.

It’s Rocket’s hope that Groot will use his new communication device. Especially since Groot’s probability of getting his voice back was nonexistent. But, Groot seems to like his new voice synthesizer, especially since it sounds more like him and less like a robot.

There was one more scene. This was Groot’s latest birthday when he became a teenager. Groot has already started to exhibit the typical teenager behaviors of being moody and embarrassed by anything that his family did. Groot was sitting in a corner playing the portable video game that Rocket just gave him for his birthday. It wasn’t a big party, as Groot had no friends in school and the kids that the Guardians invited to his party refused to show up.

Gamora just brought out the double chocolate cake that she baked for Groot’s birthday, (his favorite type of cake) and Peter wrote “Happy Birthday Groot!” in green icing. They then brought it over to the table and Rocket got a reluctant and moody Groot up from where he was sitting and brought him over to the table as the Guardians sang “Happy Birthday” to Groot. Groot sat there with a bored expression on his face before he unceremoniously blew out the candles without much gusto before he got up and went to his room, bringing an end to the party.

Rocket then turned off the TV and went to bed. As he dreamed of raising Groot, he remembered all of the good times that he had with him, not the bad.

When he got up the next morning, he got the video tape out of the VCR and placed it in its case. He then put the case in his bag before he went to the nursing home. He decided to show Groot his saplinghood, both the good times and the bad times. Since Groot suffered severe memory loss, this was Rocket’s only chance to remind Groot of all of the things that he did before the accident. If Groot even remotely remembered anything, it was worth it to Rocket.

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Read on Ao3 here.

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@trashpandaorigins @madness-on-the-milano @mattchewystuff @rr4901 @whoop-whoop-grocket @thejollymilano @janetgenea @woozletania @vic394 @canuckscot @captain---rabbit @rocket-ringtail-raccoon @pineapple-crow

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[blackbatpurplecat]

My Thoughts on “Batmobile: Arkham Tank”

Some also call it Batman: Arkham Knight, the big finale to the Arkham series that had clearly peaked two games ago.

Holy moly, what a rollercoaster ride from FABULOUS over FRUSTRATING to FANTASTIC to FUCK THIS SHIT.

Yup, I know. I’m super late to the party but please remember, the (complete) game’s price started at 90 bucks AND it was absolutely unplayable on PC for the longest time.

It’s also the first game I’ve ever ragequit and then watched the ending on YouTube because fuck. that. game.

Warning: SPOILERS ahead!

Strap in, kittybats, this is gonna be a looong one.

So if you either haven’t played it yet or if you need to refresh your memory, what’s the story?

Scarecrow is back! He didn’t do a great job at reconstructing his face but a fantastic job at perfecting his fear gas (and stealing Hugo Strange’s voice). He threatens to release the gas in Gotham which leads to people evacuating the city. The remaining cops of the GCPD are being terrorized by thugs and goons working for Scarecrow, Two-Face, Penguin, Harley Quinn, and a newly introduced villain: The Arkham Knight.

With the help of Oracle, who’s situated at the Gotham Clock Tower, Batman traces Scarecrow to ACE Chemicals. Crane has turned the entire factory into a gigantic fear gas bomb and is able to flee before Bats can take him down. The bomb can’t be defused, however, Bats is able to reduce its radius of impact so it’s mostly him who gets exposed to it.

We find out that even though Batman had drunk the cure for Joker’s disease at the end of Arkham City, he’s still infected for... some... reason that’s never explained. Fear gas and infected Joker blood is a dangerous cocktail so a life-like hallucination of the Joker materializes in front of Batman and keeps reappearing now and then to torment Bats with jokes and comments while Bats is running around the city.

There are also four more people who are still infected and locked up at one of the Batfamily’s hideouts where Robin’s working on a permanent cure. So far, only three of those infected are slowly turning into Joker while the 4th guy seems immune, giving Bats hope he might be the key to the cure.

Apparently, the Arkham Knight knows Batman really well and tips Crane off to kidnap Barbara since she’s working for Bruce. This forces Bats to confess to Gordon that his daughter’s been involved with vigilantism under Batsy’s care for years. An enraged Gordon breaks off their friendship and rushes off to find Babs himself. Yeah sure, good luck with that, Jim...

Back to the fear gas investigation, Batman and Nightwing interrogate Penguin and find out that Scarecrow had been working with a businessman named Stagg who tried to fuck Crane over and keep their invention, a dispersal device called Cloudburst, to himself. Of course, that didn’t end well. Bats tracks down Crane in an airship but gets gassed again while Scarecrow flees again.

The fear gas gives Joker control over Batman’s body for a short amount of time and adds another layer of urgency: If Bats can’t find a cure for the infection, Joker might take over his mind and body the same way he’s been taking over those other three innocent Gothamites.

Bats is able to find Barbara locked up at Crane’s hideout but she also got gassed. Her fear of Batman drives her to commit suicide. While mourning, Alfred informs Bruce that Crane now plans to release the fear gas via Cloudburst. There’s only one person who could help now - Poison Ivy. Batsy gets her out of prison and is able to recruit her for his plan. He finds an ancient and one-of-a-kind tree in Gotham that’s able to neutralize the gas so Ivy steps inside it to reactivate its strength.

More bad news are on the way when Bats finds out that Harley has broken into their hideout (because the Batfamily’s security system sucks, yeah that makes sense) and released the “Jokers.” Batman and Robin are able to recapture them all, even Harley. However, in a seriously well set up twist, the ONE dude who seemed immune to Joker’s blood is even more infected than the others and kills them. When he recognizes Joker in Batman’s eyes he also shoots himself, saying Batman will be the perfect Joker once the transformation is complete.

Robin’s quite concerned to find out about Batsy’s state and asks him to lock himself up until the game’s over but Bruce says NOPE and locks Tim up instead. Bruce couldn’t stand losing another Robin so he wants to spare Tim a similar fate that Jason Todd had to endure. You all know that story. Gee, I wonder why they bring it up all of the sudden...

So FINALLY the freaking Cloudburst is activated and douses the entire city in heavy fear gas. It’s too much for Ivy and the one-of-a-kind tree but thank God for deus ex machinas, there’s another tree, making them two-of-a-kind trees, that could help fight the gas. Batsy finds it, Ivy wakes it, the trees spread some kind of pretty pollen and the gas is neutralized. Unfortunately, it was too much for Ivy and she dies (and decomposes) in Batman’s arms.

We find out Gordon’s been kidnapped because DUH so Batsy tracks him down in the Arkham Knight’s hideout underground. The Knight takes off his mask to reveal a “““““tWiSt””””” everyone knew was coming after watching the first trailer of the game - he’s Jason fucking Todd who’s pissed at Bruce for not knowing he’s been alive all those years and just replacing him with Tim, and now wants to kill him. Bruce however wants to welcome Jason back with open arms which is too much feels for the ruthless assassin so Jason flees. Wow. How anticlimactic. Bats frees Gordon and they go to face Scarecrow at the top of a building.

Crane reveals in yet another twist you absolutely saw coming that Babs is still alive (so Babs killing herself was a result of Bats getting gassed - but how did Scarecrow know what Bats was seeing when he was under the influence???) and Gordon had made a deal with Crane to keep her that way. Jim shoots Bats in the armored chest, Scarecrow throws Babs OVER THE EDGE, Bats saves her and takes her to the GCPD.

After making sure that Jason’s goons don’t destroy the Bat servers, Bats is informed that not only Gordon but also Robin’s been now kidnapped by Crane. A kidnapped Robin, what a shocker... To save their lives, Batman drives to the ruins of Arkham Asylum where Crane, his hostages, and a camera are waiting. Crane tells Gordon to remove Batman’s mask in front of the camera which is broadcasting live on TV. Bats is okay with being unmasked and the big reveal BRUCE WAYNE IS BATMAN sends news reporters into a frenzy.

Crane injects more fear toxin into Bruce which brings out the Joker in him. Another dose, however, brings forth Joker’s worst fear: being forgotten. Batman’s mind and Joker’s mind begin fighting. Of course, Batman’s is stronger than Joker’s; Bats locks Joker up in his subconscious and regains control over his body. Bats gives Scarecrow a taste of his own toxin and takes a frightened Crane back to GCPD.

With the Batman’s identity uncovered, BATMAN IS DEAD as the intro of the game had promised. Ehm yeah, if you say so... Bats activates the Knightfall Protocol. He says goodbye to Selina, Dick, and Jim while finishing a few more side quests. Then he flies home where reporters are already waiting. Alfred welcomes him back, they close the front door, and Wayne Manor blows up.

If you had enough patience to collect >240 Riddler trophies, you’ll get the TRUE ENDING of the game:

Time has passed. Gotham is safer now, Gordon’s mayor, Babs and Tim (WTF?!?!?!) are getting married, and somewhere in Gotham, two thugs who are trying to rob a family in a back alley are being scared shitless by a huge nightmarish Batman figure.

THE END

What the actual huh?!

That was it?! THAT was the grand finale to the Arkham series?! I mean we all knew he wouldn’t die because people rarely have the balls to actually kill Batman off. You can say “This is how The Batman died” dozens of times but you’ll never convince me that you’ll actually kill him. Killing his name, his reputation, his identity, his secret, that’s just a cheap cop-out! And I realized how the game would end wayyy too early.

You built up a story so complex that you didn’t even see the plot holes anymore, you had three twist of which only ONE was good and it wasn’t even the last one, and fans didn’t even understand the true ending, yet you decided that THAT would be your huge finale and goodbye?! Lame, Rocksteady, seriously. I had expected much more.

Speaking of which:

Before the game came out, Rocksteady had proudly announced to have come up with an original character, a new piece on Gotham’s chessboard. A young man in a reddish suit who has a past with Batman, knows his identity and how he operates, and keeps calling him ‘old man.’ GEEEE, I WONDER WHO THAT IS!!!!! Yeah, it’s Jason. Woah, what a shocker. I had really hoped for something good, I was willing to give them the benefit of the doubt but NOPE, it’s the same old spiel. They didn’t even try to make his identity subtle, you know it’s Jason after his first line. And what a letdown their confrontation was. Wow, a stealth mission. And then Jason just runs away. He only shows up one last time to help Bruce at the end. Why?! You really want to tell me that after years of hating Bruce with an undying passion, recruiting hundreds of men, building dozens of tanks, and building a huge-ass drill (where the fuck did Jason get the money for all that?!), all Bruce had to do was say “sorry bro” and everything was forgotten?! That was how you resolve the conflict with one of the 2 main villains in the game?! Wow. Just... just wow.

So Knight is about Batman trying to find a cure for a Joker poison in his blood while a villain who knows Bats’ identity plans to take down a city that has only thugs in it? Is it just me or does that sound AWFULLY familiar...?! Rocksteady, you’re SO cReAtIvE.

Also the ending SUCKS!!! So Bruce makes the world believe that he and Batman are dead now. Do you even know what that means? That means Bruce and Alfred will spend the rest of their days in a Batcave without any connection to the outside world. Their family think they’re dead. So Bruce dooms Alfred to a life of isolation (cruel!!!) and gives up the “normal” half of his life to be Batman full-time. Something even the comics have established before as a fucking stupid idea!!! Bruce is NOT only Batman! Why can’t those damn fanboys pull their heads out of their asses and accept that Bruce is both Bruce Wayne AND Batman! He can’t be only one or the other; each side needs the other to exist! It’s just so fucking dumb!

After bashing the story, let’s get to bashing the gameplay:

Do Rocksteady hate their fans? Was Knight their revenge on every single fan who had said “I wish we could drive the Batmobile” in the past? Because that would explain a lot. While designing the game, they were probably thinking “Oh you complain that you don’t have the Batmobile? We’ll give you the Batmobile! Here you have the Batmobile!” That ugly tank no one’s able to handle because of the sluggish controls is just a huge FUCK YOU to gamers.

They completely overdid it. Way too many tank missions, way too many racing quests, WAY TOO MANY!!! The Batmobile missions always stopped the flow of the game, only felt tedious and turned into a boring chore. And if you weren’t tanking around, you had to solve lever puzzles to get your tank from point A to point B.

And as if the side quests weren’t average enough (the boss fights were kind of a letdown in general, especially after having played Origins), the fucking tank spoiled them even more. Remember the epic Firefly fight in Origins? In Knight, you have to race after him a few times. Done. Remember the epic Deathstroke fight in Origins? In Knight, you have to blow up his tanks (racing), take down militia towers (sometimes tank), and defuse bombs (tank), and then Batsy takes him out with one punch in a cutscene. Done. Also more tanks in the Freeze mission. And don’t get me started on ALL THE TANK MISSIONS in the main story!!!

One of the worst filler missions was “follow Gordon to the Clock Tower”: After driving 5 meters, there are more tanks, and once those are defeated, Gordon enters the Batmobile. Why the flying fuck couldn’t Gordon get in right at the start?!

The biggest joke was the Riddler mission. The puzzles were fine but WHYYY the race tracks??? How is a race track a riddle?! Nothing could be further related to Riddler than racing! What the fuck, seriously, what the fuck???

The constant forced use of the Batmobile made it hard for me to get the feeling that I was playing a Batman game. If I want a racing game, I buy a racing game. I did NOT want Need For Speed in my Batman game! Whoever decided to put THAT much Batmobile shit into the game deserves to be slapped in the face with a Joker fish. And the tank fight against Jason towards the end was the reason I quit. FUCK! THAT! FIGHT! FUCK! IT! HARD!

And the obligatory PC complaint: You sell a fucking expensive piece of shit that doesn’t run on PCs, you release patches that don’t help, and then you just say “oops sorry” before never working on improving the game again. Thanks. Also a huge thanks for fucking up the keyboard optimization. In City, we only had to tap one key for special moves, in Knight, it’s several keys we surely have the attention for in an engaging fight. And why did you change the order of the Bat gadgets?!

Alright, after such a long rant, I don’t want to leave out what I genuinely liked about the game:

For the most part, the voice-acting was perfect. There were tiny duds here and there but I don’t blame the voice-actors for those but the directors and/or the people who decided to use those takes for the game.

Kevin Conroy and Mark Hamill are simply THE best team out there. There’ll be no one else ever ever who’ll be able to capture Batman and Joker so perfectly like they do. And while I love Mark to death and I think the Arkham Joker is the best Joker period, I still think “yeah, how do you bring the best actor and the best villain back after killing him off? oh I know! make him a hallucination! cop-out!” Joker showing up again and again was absolutely not necessary and didn’t add anything story-wise but I’m happy they did it because it’s Mark and he was THE BEST PART of the game.

Some side quests were fascinating! The level design for the last Mad Hatter stage was beautiful (Origins was better though). The entire case for Professor Pyg was bone-chilling! At first, I was like “what’s with the buildup? I know it’s Hush, just get on with it” but then Hush had another side quest and I began to wonder where the first case was going. Its ending was so dark, so fucked up, so creepy, I absolutely fucking LOVED it!!!

The one quest everyone will forever remember is the one featuring Mr. Freeze! Oh boy, that was perfect writing right there! It was nice to see that Freeze hadn’t forgotten that Batsy helped him in City and asked him again to find his kidnapped wife. What I 110% had not expected was that they would bring Nora back to life! I sat there, transfixed and so happy that after all those years, they finally gave Nora a voice and more character. She stepped out of the position of a MacGuffin and became real. The ending to that quest... The dialogue, the music, the visuals. I almost cried. You can’t write a better ending to their sad and bitter-sweet love story.

The relationship between Batman and Catwoman was also written very well. You immediately notice that he talks to her in a very different way. To everyone else, friends and foes alike, he’s serious, tight-lipped, monosyllabic. With Selina however he actually engages in chit-chat. And when Selina worried about him going after Scarecrow, her soft voice made my heart sing. At the end of the stupid Riddler quest, we finally got a hot BatCat kiss. Okay, it all ended with Bruce saying farewell and them never seeing each other ever again but that’s due to the dumb finale. (One question though: If you finish the quest before the end of the game, how does Selina know that Batman is Bruce?!)

Almost finished, here are just some more additional thoughts on the game in general:

The feature of switching from character A to character B during a fight sequence was awesome, I loved that! As well as the ability to use your surroundings in a fight. Why not put that in more?!

The “recreate a crime scene” moments were cool and I would have loved more of them because, well.... Batman is A FUCKING DETECTIVE, NOT A NASCAR DRIVER!

The DLCs were nice but rather short. The Red Hood DLC completely spoiled who the Arkham Knight was though. And Jason handling guns made me ask myself why he was still using his fists.

The Batgirl mission was good! It was great to see Harley in her original outfit, Babs and Tim worked well together even though he wanted to have her out of harm’s way too often. And the backstory of the park which you could learn about via recordings was wonderfully dark. SO dark.

Writing Babs and Tim as a couple was idiotic. Why was that change made? You had Dick in the game, why didn’t you just use the canon couple?! Changing Dick to Tim had no influence on the story so why do it?!

Seeing Bats and Babs interact without any forced sexual shit was beautiful!

THOSE MOTHERFUCKING MAN-BAT JUMP SCARES!!!!!! WHY???? My heart almost exploded!!!!!!!!!!

Giving Scarecrow Hugo Strange’s voice was cheap. Whenever he made an announcement, I felt like I was back in City. Don’t remind me of a better game I could be playing instead, Knight...

Catwoman’s purple suit from the 90s was a skin you could use!!! I LOVE HER SO MUCH!!! SHE’S SO BEAUTIFUL!!! Yeah, I know, it was a modified Batgirl skin but SHE WAS STILL SO BEAUTIFUL!

After the buildup in City, Azrael and his Order were another letdown.

After the buildup in City, Hush was another letdown (even though the reveal was pretty cool and Conroy’s voice-acting was SO AWESOME!). You have a villain that looks like your hero in a story about how the hero is revealed to be a vigilante. Why not USE the villain for something, ANYTHING?! And if you finish the mission AFTER the game’s end, how come Hush doesn’t know who Batman is?!

Why put a normal firefighter into one cell with Gotham’s worst criminal scum?!

Stop trying to convince us that Bruce loved an insane maniac who wants to kill millions of people.

The Ra’s al Ghul mission was intriguing however! I did not know who was killing his followers until the reveal and the decision at the end of the quest was a great dilemma! It had no influence on the game but I liked how it made the player think.

You made me feel pity for Killer Croc! How dare you! Plus there was a moment, when you’re in a duct underneath a freaking HUGE Killer Croc and the game told you to take him down. I was just looking at that gigantic monster and thought NOPE, CAN I PLEASE LEAVE?!

I still prefer the less realistic designs of the characters from the first games. Their expressions were less stoic and their eyes were less dead.

The goons’ conversations were a riot again!

JOKER’S SONG NUMBER!!! HOLY SHIT YES!!!

The designs of the race tracks were fantastic! While I think Rocksteady dropped the ball with gameplay and story, the level designs were marvelous!

The photo mode was a really cool feature!!!

I highly appreciate the creators’ love for detail. There’s an entire video about the easter eggs in Arkham Knight and it’s TWO FREAKING HOURS long! That’s a level of dedication I respect!

To close this up, I doubt I’ll return to this game very soon, if ever. I loved Asylum, I can play City in my sleep, I enjoyed Origins and do not understand the hate it gets, but Knight? Nah.

It’s the Batmobile that breaks this game’s back. Rocksteady simply didn’t know when to stop or how to work it in well. The tanks and racing quests kill the Batman-y atmosphere every single time and get old extremely quick. Those parts become monotonous and repetitive, and the worst crime is that fighting tanks and drones side-lines the actual villains you’d much rather fight.

I can forgive lame boss battles, I can forgive plot holes, but if the gameplay isn’t fun, I will not replay the story, no matter how well it’s written. A game’s supposed to entertain me, not frustrate me into leaving it for days (which happened twice before I quit).

Do I recommend Arkham Knight? If you like car races and shooting games, yes. If not, watch a playthrough on YouTube. It pains me to say that this Batman game, the big finale to an amazing series, only goes downhill after the opening cutscene.