#also how come so many people headcanon him with tolerance to drugs and then say that he’s drugged when he’s convenient to victimize him?

[1bringthesun]

so when dazai was in the hospital with that nurse, who’s the right one to blame?

(discussions of s/a, medical unprofessionally, and other bsd-typical things)

asking this question is wrong to begin with. there’s no, “ oh no, but who will we blame for the situation?” are you really still looking for someone to blame in bungou stray dogs, the series of grey morality?

well, i don’t blame you. so im making a post about it!

for convenience, i’m just going to assume they slept together because it makes the most sense, and is also generally what the fandom assumes when they try to point fingers at either two.

to better understand why people think a certain way, let’s break it down and approach this problem from two perspectives!

the nurse was in the wrong:

dazai had just gotten out of surgery for having a bullet wound and is still under the influence of anesthesia. she sees him using his phone and takes it from him. he’s handsome and willing to do things with her, so she sleeps with him, and when they’re done, she’s willing to give it back. not only that, but she has the audacity to ask again if they can do it “just once more.” it’s obvious she has zero care for him as a patient if she’s willing to sleep with someone fresh out of surgery, and also being under the influence, he’s not able to properly consent. regardless, she takes her chance to be with a handsome man, completely neglecting her job to care for his health as a nurse and breaking probably every single aspect of professionalism.

dazai was in the wrong:

an annoying woman is disregarding the gravity of his work and holding him, someone who’s important to the fate of the city, by normal hospital standards, when he’s been shot by a bullet before and knows his own body inhumanly well; another doctor even gave him permission, so who’s she to act like the boss of him? obviously, this bothers him, and he needs his phone, so he decides to take the quickest path to getting it back, and, spoiler alert: it isn’t recovery. he seduces her and puts her job at risk just so he’ll get his phone back, and when she becomes attached to him, he says yeah, sure, they can fool around again… if he feels like it.

they’re both in the wrong:

people blame her of sexually assaulting him, and also blame him of sexually assaulting her. they say he couldn’t have consented, she overly wasn’t interested in the beginning, she was meant to care for her patient, he’s a scumbag and a womanizer, etc.

but don’t you see? the fact that both of them have done awful things in these two panels…

…is the point.

dazai is an asshole for sleeping with a woman he doesn’t give a damn about just so she’ll do what he tells her to, and she’s totally insane for letting a patient who was just in surgery share physical intimacy with her.

she’s an awful nurse, and he’s a bitch! they both suck!!!! why only blame one of them for sucking?

from an outsider’s perspective, the nurse does seem to be more in the wrong. she was meant to be his caretaker for a while and completely neglected that, even going so far as to have relations with a patient still under the effects of drugs.

but… was he? he was speaking completely lucidly, and none of his thoughts or words or actions resembled someone under the influence in the slightest. he made a sour face at her when he realized he couldn’t just do whatever he wanted to do, and her attitude in the beginning was clearly appropriate for the situation. calling dazai a victim in this situation is wrong. he clearly took the initiative to change her position. is that not consent?

he manipulated her for access to a phone, and she used him as means of gratification, and both of that is wrong.

[xerith-42]

Minecraft Diaries Stoner Headcanons

Part 2 in the Aphverse Stoner Series!

Disclaimer: I haven't watched Season 3! I mean, I have, but I don't remember any of it other than that Blaze was in it-- And I just checked the wiki and he's a villain? Uhm. No, he isn't. Hatsune help me I'm going to have to make a whole post about that now... anyways, pretend Blaze is just like another guard Irena gathered because she just collects them like they're pokemon.

Blaze our beloved to start us off. Uh, pipe weed is really common in Ru'aun, it's actually a primary export. And well, Blaze is a pretty big fan of it. Once when he's smoking weed with his friend, he comes to a realization.

"Listen, listen. We use earth with the plant, fire by lighting it, and air to inhale it. What we're missing is water." I am saying that Blaze made the first bong in the MCD universe. Or that he at least came up with it and was credited for the original idea. These two are very proud of their idea and want to spread it everywhere.

Pipe weed is not allowed at the guard academy, and guards are expected to remain sober, even though alcohol is okay?? Doesn't really make sense to a lot of new cadets, including Laurance, who's able to smuggle it in, and hide it from Garroth.

Vylad does actually smoke pipe weed, particularly while on his own during those 15 years. It helps relax their muscles, and causes a sort of numbness that helps keep the calling quiet.

When he tells Laurance of this, both of them share it together at some point.

Dante used to smoke weed with Laurance on slow nights in Phoenix Drop, and even smoked it with Nicole a few times. He quit when he found out Nana was pregnant.

The number one smoker is Travis. His mom had a stock pile of it he found, enough to last years, and it's one of the main things he brings with him to Ru'aun.

When Travis and Blaze meet, they are instant friends. I don't know what happens in Season 3, but this is all that matters to me. They would be BESTIES!!

Despite being banned by the church, Zane is in a position of power so the rules don't apply to him. He never does it when he has something serious going on, but when Zane has some downtime, he'll light up a bowl to take the strain out of his shoulders.

A downside of being a Shadow Knight is that your lungs are much more used to inhaling smoke and dealing with heat thanks to the Nether, so they have some insane tolerance. Like, Vylad was smoking so much, and Laurance is never not frustrated at how much he has to go through in a single sitting just to feel something.

And Aaron? When he was a father? And a Lord?? Of course he was smoking. He was very careful about it, and kept it away from Jacob. And as he traveled with the rest of the cast, he was always careful to hide it from the kids. He didn't quite mind if anyone else saw, as long as they were smart enough not to ask for it.

Travis is not smart enough.

Also Aaron likes wearing the bandana when he accidentally gets a little too high so no one can see how bloodshot his eyes are. Irena can tell by the way he stumbles a little more than usual.

Zoey? Pot head. She's literally an immortal elf, she has tried every drug Ru'aun has ever had and then some. She stops smoking it as much when she's taking care of the kids, but after the group is gone for a few years and she spends more nights searching for a way to bring them back, she picks it back up to try and seem less stressed when people talk to her.

I feel like all Lords smoke just a little. Like, it's such a stressful job. You're constantly having to care for so many people, be a master of subjects you might not have studied, and who knows when one day you wake up to the news that you have to ready yourself for war. People need a way to relieve the stress.

Except Irena. She tried it once when she caught Aaron smoking and it tasted so bad and she did not enjoy the feeling at all. When she becomes friends with Blaze he tries to coax her into it, but she never caves, and he backs off.

LUCINDA on the other hand!! She's a witch! She's a bit of an herbalist! Does she know the perfect growing conditions for the plant of origin and how to cultivate it's harvest for maximum output?? You bet your ass she does!

Blaze x Lucinda x Travis polycule when?

The first time Lucinda and Blaze meet each other he tells her about his innovation of using glass devices to create water vapor that you can smoke, and Lucinda very eagerly drags him into her brewing room and just proudly goes "I have a cauldron!! >:)" And Blaze gets so excited!! He's already trying to figure out what he would have to custom order to work with this, but he needs to try it.

Wait why is that adorable I need to write that now.

[cosmicjoke]

I sent you an ask earlier but my phone glitched so I'm sure it didn't go through. Basically I just wanted to say that I'm so pissed on your behalf that that crazy person found your blog. I checked their supposed Twitter and the bigotry on there is just absolutely crazy and utterly unhinged. They also seem to dislike other ships but from their words they don't hate it as much as eruri because Levi is straight and dominant in bed in his ship with Petra and Hange and that's why they attack eruris because most/all of them see Levi as the gay bottom in the relationship. Which is confusing because it means they are willing to share their husband "Levi" as long as he's seen as a dom daddy at least. Which to them is the canon Levi and so he should always be acknowledged as such. The way this person bullies gay shippers for their fanon without noticing that their Levi is also a fanon is quite amusing and a bit hilarious. And as a Levihan enjoyer I headcanon Hange being the top. Hetrosexual relationship doesn't mean the man is always the dominating one in bed for christ sake. Such loser mentality.

Honestly, the fandom will be a better place if strange assholes like this harasser accept that Levi's sexuality is not known plus not important to the story. It always baffles me when people say there's nothing that implies that Levi is gay but there's many instances that implies he's straight. Like no honey, your interpretation of Levi is the same as the people you accuse of trying to make gay Levi canon. You're also trying to make straight Levi canon, when we don't know what he is, like we truly don't know, there's no implication whatsoever regarding his sexuality. How this flies over heads is just baffling.

PS. They also really hate Onyankopon lmao. But he's ship with Levi is not famous so they're not that derange over it. They literally went on a rant about how people should stop shipping Levi with ugly men. Onyankopon is literally so handsome. I don't know what drugs she's on lol

Ah, thank you so much! I truly appreciate the support, I can't tell you how much!

I honestly had no idea about the extent of this person's bigotry and just vitriolic disdain in particular for gay ships. Just the bizarre jealousy on display too when Levi is shipped with any other character, that truly is unhinged. But they definitely seem specifically to have some kind of major issue with Levi being paired with other men, which isn't surprising, given the language they use in their rants about eruri shippers and Erwin in particular. They're honestly disgusting. Them being more "tolerant" of Levi with Hange or Petra just affirms their unhinged bias against gay ships, and against men being more sensitive at all. They're so full of shit too in claiming they weren't behind any of those anon hate messages that were being sent. It was so clearly them, lol. The same goes for their claim that they don't try to hide who they are on twitter and other platforms.

But yes, as you said, they bully other shippers for engaging in fanon portrayals of Levi, while being completely unaware that their portrayal of Levi is rooted in just as much fantasy and has nothing to do with his canon character. It's honestly pathetic. Levi's sexuality is a complete non-factor in the story. It's never mentioned, never hinted at, never relevant to anything. We have no idea what his sexual orientation is, or if he even has one. He might be asexual for all we know. So anyone trying to claim that their portrayal of Levi as a sub or a dom is "canon" is literally just talking out of their ass. It's fine to see Levi however you want, or to come up with scenarios and relationships for him for fanart and fanfiction, but don't try and shove it down people's throats as "canon Levi", lol. And right, it's just as valid to have Levi and Hange being romantically involved and having Hange be the dominant one. That's just a possible and likely as any of these other fanon portrayals of Levi's love life, lol. That's what people don't get. They think because Levi's demeanor is one of aloofness and stoicism, that's some sort of proof that he would be a domineering, violent sexual partner. It makes zero sense, especially given his background and who we know Levi actually is underneath the appearance of indifference people often mistake him for having.

And that doesn't surprise me either that they hate Onyankopon and call him "ugly". Now I think I know where their meltdown on me came from, since I'm currently writing a Levi/Onyankopon fic. Oh the horror, I guess, lol. Like you said, the fandom would be a lot better place if people like 7m7n7 would just disappear back into whatever hole they crawled out of.

[commenter2]

“Unhappy Campers” review

Blitzo and co. go on a job at Earth, and WE GET A MILLIE EPISODE!!! 

It’s been forever since we saw I.M.P. on Earth doing their job, so it’s nice to see them back at it. Hopefully we can get more Earth based episodes soon. We still need to find out what happened to Cletus, Keenie, and Collin.

Is Blitzo going to see Stolas?

Is the nurse’s appearance supposed to be a Nabnab/Nabnaleena reference?

Blitzo is trying to see his sister! Makes sense why he is in Sloth since we did hear from Verosika that she was in rehab.

Hell’s equivalent to Google is called Gaggle.

Though I’m sure they were like job representatives or people at places Barbie use to work at, I wonder if there is still a chance the people Blitzo was talking to on his phones were “friends”/informants of his.

Now we get to the scene everyone wants to see. Though funny I wished there was a scene explaining that Moxxie had no choice and had to wear the female disguise as I have this headcanon that Millie usually doesn’t get along with other girls to a point said girls end up in the hospital, hence why Moxxie had to fill in the role while Millie talked to the boys.

Aww Millie is such a great wife, though it would have been nice to see her assertive side when it comes to the job.

Finally someone points out the gang’s demonic traits.

Oh no that kid got Yamcha to death. TWICE!

MILLIE SONG!!!

Ugh that Spongebob meme face.

Where can I get a Millie flag?

I love how the song’s subtitles can’t keep up with what the background characters are saying and how it also seems to love Millerd.

I wonder if that shark is a cousin of the shark from season 1 :3

It’s nice to see that though they are a perfect couple, Moxxie and Millie do have arguments. I also like to think Millie’s speech is slightly symbolic of how usually she is kind of in the background and doesn’t have that many moments compared to the things Blitzo, Moxxie, and even Stolas have gone through. Yes I know about Vivzie saying HB is guy character centered while HH will be lady character centered but I still wanted to point it out.

The Asmodeon Crystal in action! And of course since its related to the demon of lust, the first one we actually see is inappropriate.

Wouldn’t saying a demon having the “voice of an angel” be insulting? Maybe its ones of the few things related to heaven that is okay/tolerated in demon society like when Blitzo said Oh God in annoyance. I defiantly could see Lucifer describing Lilith and Charlie like this.

The writers missed out on the perfect chance for Blitzo to say that he didn’t want Moxxie to stop ridding him XD. I mean that scene must have been a dream come true for Blitzo.

I know it’s to hide her horns, but Barbie’s human hair looks like something Velvette would stylize her hair as.

Since Blitzo just said that things like Heroin isn’t as dangerous to demons, I’m guessing that H-8 thing he said a drug that IS deadly for demons.

Barbie just said it’s easy to manipulate humans, so why would losing him be that bad? Is she just lazy?

I just noticed how Barbie has a similar head tattoo as Blitzo, but it’s crossed out.

IDK if it’s just me, but I feel like Moxxie is fighting better here.

In the scene where Millie is crowd surfing, is the girl in the purple dress with ponytail girl a reference to the Baby Doll villain from Batman: The Animated Series?

Nice to see Moxxie and Millie make up, but did they have to mentally scar the whole camp XD. Heck even the episode’s subtitles are trying to help with that.

Katie Killjoy reference, would be hilarious if they were somehow connected

Human television can be watched in Hell! Awesome, and explains how that Looney Tune episode in the HH pilot was available for sinners to watch.

Sleeping Loona!

Did anyone notice any Friday the 13th or Gravity Fall references in the episode? I feel like the caps the campers could be but still.

Well that was another nice casual episode, especially since it was a Millie episode. After all this time it was nice seeing our favorite Imp lady get some focus, and since Sallie Mae is coming back soon hopefully we can get another one exploring her life before she met Moxxie.

I also like how though Blitzo had to be in the episode he did his own thing for most of the episode that didn’t involve the others being close by, something I have brought up before in previous episodes. It’s also nice that we got a hint at his relationship with Barbie, sure some might say she deserved more screen time but at least we got a basic understanding of what could have happened, and I bet we will get more on it in the Fizz and Blitzo flashback episode.

The only flaw the episodes had was how dumb and selfish Moxxie was in the episode. Sure the episode needed something like this to happen so Millie can get her screen time and for the conflict between them to happen, but I don’t see why the writers couldn’t have done this while still having Moxxie gather info to find the culprit like he wanted. Maybe it would have made the plot stronger as Moxxie would have also been annoyed that Millie hasn’t gathered any info from the campers and it was just lucky that he was able to narrow down the possible culprits.

We are almost halfway done with season 2, and it’s likely the next 2 episodes will heavily be centered on Fizz and his past with Blitzo. I think the next episode will be the one where Fizz and Ozzie perform in the Greed Ring, only for something to happen that is followed up in the flashback episode about the day Fizz and Blitzo stopped being friends, again maybe we find out why Barbie hates Blitzo in it as well.

As always I want your thoughts on the episode.

[the-cult-of-russo]

gotta know how u think billy would be as a dad with his kids :D

I had so many requests for Dad!Billy headcanons 😭

I hope you're ready for this chaotic ramble.

Please remember this is my Billy I'm writing

-

You know those parents who take like a million pictures of their kid and show them to everyone? The kind that talks about their kid nonstop to anyone who'll listen? Their family, friends, the poor random old lady at the store that just wants to buy some damn milk.

That's Billy.

He's such an unbelievably proud parent, his pride for his kids knows no bounds. It doesn't even need to be some kind of milestone worth celebrating, everything his kid does makes him proud. You better believe when his baby has an explosive crap and ruins their clothes, he's boasting about it the next day to Frank and the guys at Anvil.

-

He's incredibly protective. Murder is a possibility if his kids in danger. He wants nothing more than to keep his kids safe. If they're being bullied, it takes all of his willpower to stop himself from kicking the kids ass for doing that to his kid. He's not above picking a fight with the bullies dad though if they don't get their little shit head in check and also making it known to the principle that this shit won't fly with him.

~

"Mr Russo, I don't think you understand how serious this is. Your son broke a kids nose," the principle mutters with a glare.

Billy tilts his head, regarding the teacher with those unsettling eyes that has the old man squirming in his seat.

"You’re damn right he did," Billy replies seriously, a proud tone to his voice. His dark eyes cut to his left where his son is, practically his double. As Billy smirks, unable to help himself, his son wears the same one although he's lowering his head to hide his amusement.

"We don't tolerate that behaviour here, Mr Russo," the principle huffs. Billy's eyes harden then as his eyes narrow, sitting forward in his chair just the right amount to be imposing. The second the man leans back he knows it worked.

"You know what I don't tolerate? My kid bein' bullied. You assholes won't do shit to stop it, so I say let the little fucker get a taste of his own medicine. Serves him right for messin' with a Russo," he smirks wickedly.

~

He teaches them self defence, wanting them to be able to look after themselves if it ever came down to it. Naturally, for their 16th birthday, they're gifted with a big ass knife.

-

Billy as a dad is so stupidly soft.

We all remember the scene from the show, right? Where he's in the hospital with his mom and he says;

"Maybe you did me a solid, you know? I mean, the way I see it, you want weak kids, give 'em everything. But if you... if you want 'em strong... treat 'em hard."

When he has a kid of his own he realises just what utter garbage this is. The idea of all the shit he's been through making him into the tough son of a bitch he is today is born from trauma that he still hasn't dealt with. The way his brain tries to rationalise what he went though. To make it make sense instead of it being so goddamn senseless.

But if he's honest, more than he'd like to admit, he finds himself wondering just what his life would have been like if he grew up in a loving home. What it would be like to feel wanted and cared for. To rise to the top being helped and cheered on by others instead of clawing his way there with bloodied and dirty fingers, the weight of the world bearing down on him as he's beat down at every turn.

He never wants his kids to feel that way. Not even a fraction of how unloved and unwanted he felt. He does everything in his power to make sure they know just how much he cares about them. There's literally nothing he wouldn't do for his kids. They could turn up at home one day and confess to a murder and Billy wouldn't hesitate to ask where the body is so he can handle it for them.

-

Billy is ridiculously sentimental when it comes to his kids. Drawings go up on the fridge and when a new one takes its place, the old one goes into a box of many others that he can't seem to ever throw away. He has multiple pictures of his kids at his office, even some framed cute drawings they did for him. He's kept all the mementos from the pregnancy, birth and onwards. They're his little treasures.

-

Billy is super supportive of everything his kids do. He makes sure they get a good education but he never pushes them to do something they don't want to do. Despite the large college fund he's got for them, if they choose not to go to college, he doesn't pressure them. Instead, whatever hopes and dreams they have, he does everything in his power to support and help them. Whether that's moral and emotional support, money or even breaking a few jaws of people standing in their way.

-

Let's look a little bit at how he is throughout some of the ages of his kid.

Billy with a baby is a sight to behold. No one has ever seen Lieutenant William Russo so goddamn soft. Once he's got hold of his baby, you've got no chance of getting them back off him. You'd have to fight him. He adores holding his little one close, soaking them in. He's constantly holding them no matter what he's doing and baby carriers and wraps are a godsend to him. You'd heard about them from a friend and told Billy and you better believe by the time the baby's born that he's an expert on all things baby wearing. He's a perfectionist and carrying a baby wrong can be dangerous. He makes sure he knows how to do it right.

Just as he has little affectionate touches for you, he has the same for his baby. His large hand stroking their tiny head and little hair. His finger stroking their chubby little cheek. He's a tactile person and touch is grounding for him. It soothes him to do so with his baby and reassures him they're really there and that they're okay.

He's super attentive. Of course he works a lot but as soon as he becomes a dad, he doesn't stay late anymore and makes sure to have days off. The second he comes home, he's making a beeline for his baby, scooping them up with a grin. He loves to read to them, something that continues as they grow up. His weekends used to be restful or if he was feeling like a masochist, he'd work from home. But now weekends are his time to shine. By the time you wake up on a Saturday morning, he's already up with the baby, making you breakfast as he's got the baby attached to him via baby carrier.

As his baby grows into a toddler, each milestone makes him tearful and full of pride. He kisses any booboos that happen and he's constantly playing with his child. He has a pretty silly side to him that most don't get to see. Making his kid laugh and smile brings him the greatest joy.

He loves taking his toddler to the office with him. Everyone dotes on his kid and treats them like royalty.

When they turn into a small child, he watches with a proud smile and amusement as his kid wants to fight with his men, watching them 'beat' the shit out of them. The guys at Anvil are more than happy to very dramatically go down, and the apple doesn't fall far from the tree when the tiny Russo grins smugly at their 'win'.

Their first day at school and Billy's a mess. It's such a turning point and he doesn't know how to deal with how fast their growing up. But every achievement at school, even minor ones, and he's showering them with praise.

He encourages them to work hard and as soft as he might be, he is still the boss. He makes sure they do their homework and don't fall behind on their studies.

One thing Billy loves is teaching his kids stuff. Whether that's mundane stuff to help with school or teaching them shit he knows like survivalist things, because you can never be too prepared, right? He loves helping them with school projects and answering any questions they might have about one of the many things he's knowledgeable about.

When his kids moves onto those hard teenage years, the ones where everything feels so dramatic and world ending, he's a little tougher when it calls for it. Billy is no novice to rebellion, he has a rebellious streak of his own and marches to the beat of his own drum half the time. He respects that. What he doesn't respect or tolerate is behaviour that's going to fuck his kid over in the long run or self sabotage. He will be firm and a hard ass if he needs to be to keep his kids on a path where they don't get hurt or ruin their life.

Billy has a zero tolerance policy on drugs. After the shit with his mother, he won't budge on this. If he finds out his kid is dabbling in drugs, they're grounded until they're old enough to move out.

-

No matter what age his kids are, Billy loves them immensely. He wants to be the father he wished he'd had growing up and he pours all of his anguish and pain from his upbringing into it. Channeling it into the purest form of love for his kids. To break the curse that had hold of him. He won't perpetuate the cycle.

Being a father brings him a sense of completeness and peace he didn't think was possible for him to achieve. It fills the void that's been eating away at his soul from his lack of love as a child and he loves every second of being a parent. Even the hard moments.

-

Bonus:

The Russo's and the Castle's go on monthly camping trips together. Billy loves the outdoors, the mild survivalist feelings he gets from it without the real danger. He loves taking his kids there, teaching them everything. In his role as dad and uncle, he sits around the camp fire at night, the light of the flames dancing along his face as he very theatrically tells the kids a spooky story.

You and his kids are his immediate family but the Castle's are his family too. So he really loves it when you all get to spend time together like that.

[idontblushsrry]

Uhh may I make a request for Ouran High School Host club? Just a headcanon for how the host would react to meeting someone how is a big time animal lover. (Like they pretty much live there life like the Irwin family)

A/N: I was thinking about how I’d write this and my brain just went ‘they lost their shit at the sight of instant coffee’, so uhh I hope this is to your liking. I tried to get as much animal variety as I could even though I didn’t really touch on marine animals that much)

Warnings: Like 2 swear words (pinky promise), slight drug mention(literally so small you might not even notice it), spoilers (minor) for Tamaki’s mom

Word Count: 1292

General

So this is under the assumption that like the Irwin family, Reader (or their family) has access to a wide variety of animals (from domestic to wild)

All of them respect the passion you have for animals

While they all might have various feelings on animals (see below), they can’t deny that you truly do love animals

Your family’s sanctuary focuses on healing injured animals and rehabilitating them so they can go back into the wild

Of course, your family has many sanctuaries around the world and some focus more on conservation while others focus on research

The one closest to the school focuses mainly on conservation and as such, is massive and functions like a zoo ( in terms of having people come in and see the animals)

Anyways, the host club is very supportive and often helps you with organizing donation events

Oftentimes, your family will collaborate with them and allow them to rent out parts of the conservation center for events

Aside from the conservation center though, your family owns a few ranches and farms (not for commercial profit, although yall have sold a few animals)

The farms and ranches are relatively small scale but they make great venues for the host club and a great place for getaways/vacations

Your main house is where you keep most of your favorite animals

You have an aviary attached to your room (connected through a hallway that connects to your room) as well as a butterfly garden in the backyard

You also have an aquarium tank, 2 dogs, 1 cat, 1 snake, and a hamster that visits on weekends

You had to be stopped at some point

Tamaki

Tamaki loves animals

He was never really around animals growing up because of how sensitive his mom’s immune system is

So when he sees that you’re an animal person, he’s super excited

Like this man is already planning playdates between Antoinette and your pets/animals

You love his enthusiasm, just one small problem

It’s a little too much enthusiasm

Yes the animals are well trained, but how would you react if a 6′0 giant with long arms came barreling towards you screaming showing its teeth?

So yeah, Tamaki tends to set the animals off/ make them nervous

Because of that he’s only allowed around certain animals (ex. certain monkeys, certain birds, etc.)

He’s happy that he’s allowed around some animals but he still pouts every time there’s an animal he can’t be around

Kyoya

This man

Kyoya does not fuck with animals. Like at all

The first time the host club went to your house, you were holding a hamster and Kyoya moved back about 10 feet

When you asked him what was wrong, he just said “Rats are carriers of many of the most deadly diseases”

You told him that you were holding a hamster and that while hamsters were rodents, the worst he’d get sick with would be salmonella

He doesn’t believe you, but yeah sure whatever

For Kyoya it just gets worse after that

The first time he sees you holding a tarantula, he loses his shit

“Look how cute it is Kyoya!”

“Get that vermin away from me!”

I could go on and on about how much Kyoya doesn’t like animals (even domestic ones like cats and dogs)

He hates going to your house, but he often has to go there in order to set up events for the host club, what a nightmare

While he doesn’t care for animals, the business side of his brain can’t help but think of a marketing opportunity

Mori

Is one of two hosts that are going to be chill about it

He doesn’t feel one way or the other about animals and thinks it’s cool that you’re interested in them

Only thing is; if Honey’s afraid of your animals, he will have to ask you to leave he won’t hesitate to step in “harm’s” way

Surprisingly though, that actually makes him the chillest with your animals

Much to your surprise (and Tamaki’s sorrow), the animals love him

He just has this calming vibe that sets the animals at ease

It also helps that he smells nice and is super tall

For most of them it’s like sitting on a giant tree

He’s not really complaining though, it makes his job of protecting Honey that much easier

Honey

Oh boy

He might actually be the worst with animals

It’s not even an issue of being unable to defend against aggressive animals (Honey could probably solo a grizzly bear)

It’s just he has a very strict “cute” animal policy that changes wildly depending on his mood, the temperature, the angle of the wind, the humidity, etc.

He’s very bougie when it comes to what animals he will tolerate and what animals he will refuse to see

The general safe choices are rabbits (especially bunnies), kittens, cows, tits (the bird species), and baby animals of almost every domestic mammal species)

Him and the hamster you see on weekends are best friends

Also, you have had issues with him trying to feed the animals sweets

Explaining to Honey why rabbits can’t have carrot cake was not an easy conversation, nor was it one you thought you’d need to have

Because of how specific he is about what animals he finds cute, you likened him to a crocodile (because of how sensitive they are to temp. changes in egg)

Needless to say...he was not pleased

Hikaru

So him and Kaoru don’t really care for animals but they try to relate to you in somewhat similar but different ways

Hikaru is always trying to get you to do/recreate stunts with the animals

“Hey Y/N, we should-”

“No Hikaru”

“You don’t even know what I was gonna say”

“No you cannot use the dolphins for hoop tricks, no you cannot teach the gorillas how to roll blunts, no you cannot “bribe” the koalas with eucalyptus...”

Yeah he’s a menace

It’s mostly all in good fun though

Hikaru doesn’t really care for animals but he does find it hilarious that the animals like him more than Tamaki

Also, completely random but Hikaru definitely send you those “horse-sized duck vs duck sized horses” memes

Kaoru

Kaoru also tries to use animals on the internet to relate to you, but he’s a lot tamer than Kaoru

Kaoru is kind of like the parent who learns one thing you like and is like “that’s your entire personality right?”

Poor bby is trying his best

Anyways, whereas Hikaru tries to recreate memes, Kaoru sends you them

They range in quality and format; from top text, bottom text to “is this a ____”

At least once a day, Kaoru will send you a meme or picture of an animal with a caption that says ‘this reminded me of u :)’

It’s so endearing that you can’t even be mad about it

Haruhi

Is the only other one who’s kind of cool about the whole thing

She’s really only been around animals in the park or the occasional pet store

Growing up, she didn’t really have the time (or money) to go to the zoo, that and the fact that Ranka doesn’t care at all for animals (she thinks they’re weird and gross)

When Tamaki hears this, he works himself up into a frenzy, torn that his “daughter” has never been to a zoo (even tho he hasn’t either)

But she likes the fact that you’re so passionate about animals

At heart, she’s a scholar, so she loves learning new things she didn’t know before, she could spend all day just listening to you talk about animals

Not to mention the fact that you’re basically giving her a free informational tour  every time you see an animal

[kbysh-kds]

FC3!Diego AU headcanons

Whoooo boy, ok this is long! It migth take a few minutes to scroll through 👀

Vaas was born in Yara, rigth in the Castillo residence. Both Antón and her wife were fairly young, just in their 30s and recently married. The residence - once a summer house in Antón’s chilhood - was given to them by Antón’s brother as a marriage present (The same house Antón shows Diego in the Rite of Passage comics)

Mama Castillo was a very soft spoken, polite woman. Her family was on the poorer side, being one of many siblings. So, when she announced her engament to Antón her family was more than happy to accept their marriage.

Antón being an up-and-coming politican at the time, just staring to plan out how he would run for presidency, made sure to get brownie points any way he could. And this was what caused the start of the strain on his marriage. He got in touch with a wrong people and stacked up an insane amount of debt, which he couldn’t pay. 

It turned out that those people were slavers (an early version of the Pirates basically), and since Antón couldn’t pay they demanded him to give over something entirely else. That being a now six year old Vaas.

Agreeing was the worst decision and nor Antón or Mama Castillo ever recovered. Mama Castillo fell ill a few days after after all the stress and worrying for her boy. Antón? Ofcourse he was worried aswell, but didn’t want to show this infront of his wife. He made sure to hide any uncertain emotions just to seem calm and collected. And he carried this with him all the way to his presidency.

Meanwhile little Vaas gets taken to the Rooks, where he ends up in a prison camp. He’s scared shitless, but which six year old wouldn’t be? You’ve just been taken away from your parents, you don’t know where you are and you don’t understand what they’re saying to you because you don’t speak the language. Luckily the Rakyat was already at war with the slavers and liberated the prison camp just a week later.

Vaas was already covered by smaller scars by the time the camp got liberated. He couldn’t stop shivering, didn’t even let a Rakyat doctor touch him until the doctor spoke to him in spanish. Since he was so small and already showing signs of malnourishment the Rakyat took him in, specifically Citra’s family who was nine year old small girl at that time.

He learned to speak english from Citra and the other children but he never actually learnt how to read or write. 

Citra was already fascinated with the perfect warrior story even as a little girl, wouldn’t stop telling about it to her new little brother. And when she was chosen as the Warrior Goddes - as per Rakyat - and tradition her first fitting candidate for a perfect warrior was none other than said little brother, now in his teens.

Vaas was completly oblivious until Citra made him drink something. Going through the worst possible drug trip of his life the next thing he knew when he regained conciousness was his own sister, well, taking advantage of him. Even he doesn’t know how but he managed to escape, now with a gaping slash wound above his brow stretching up to his scalp from a kukri. (The same knife both Buck and Citra are looking for.)

Back home, Mama Castillo falls pregnant again, despite reaching her 50s. Antón is happy to say the least, but Mama Castillo? All the memories of her sweet boy that was taken from her flooding back all at once wasn’t healthy for her. She didn’t live through childbirth and Antón was left as a widow with a newborn son named Diego.

Due to his wife’s passing and the fact that he willingly abonded his oldest Antón becomes overprotiective of Diego, almost helicopter parent like (but in a strict way) not willing to go through the pain of losing a child again.

Half a month after his escape from Citra and the Rakyat, Vaas meets Hoyt who recently came into power after killing the previous overlord (The man Antón became indebted to). Hoyt recognized Vaas, hearing about him from the previous overlord and seeing how the freshly twenty year old boy was desperate he offered him a job as a right hand man and thus, the Pirates were formed.

Hoyt took the first oppurtunity he could get to pump Vaas full of drugs, make him addicted so he couldn’t escape. This was also the perfect time according to Hoyt to tell Vaas how his real father willingly gave up on him.

Vaas, now going through existential dread since both of his families betrayed him starts destroying himself with anything he could think of: smoking, stronger/heavier drugs, self harm even. He found the most comfort in drugs, since whenever he was high, going through various trips an image of a younger woman would always comfort him, talking sweetly to him and he knew this woman was familiar. But he just couldn’t figure out why.

During the start of the summer of 2012 (roughly a month before Far Cry 3′s events) Antón visited the islands to conduct business with Hoyt, brining a now five year old Diego with him. Hoyt wasn’t exactly fond of the idea of tolerating a little shit of a toddler while they talked business, so he tasked Vaas with the lovely task of babysitting a toddler while his father discussed a drug deal.

Ever since Hoyt told him about his real family, Vaas despised the name Castillo. When he learned that the five year old he had to look after was a Castillo too, he thougth about drowning him right then and there. But, he soon changed his attitude when he figured out that Diego, was in fact, his little brother.

Vaas quickly grew fond over Diego. From taking 2 hour naps with him (even though Vaas was probaly passed out and Diego just cuddled up to him) to showing all the cool little places he found when he was in his teens. He’s just happy to have a family member than didn’t utterly disappoint him.

When Antón and Hoyt finally finish business after week, Vaas brings Diego back but before Antón could leave he calls him aside. At first Vaas is screaming, throwing everything he could at him and then breaking down, almost on his knees begging his father to take him back home, how he hates this island, how he hates the people here, how he hates Hoyt and so on and so on. Once Diego chimed in Antón didn’t really have much of a choice.

Hoyt was furious, how couldn’t he be? The most valuable little puppet was ditching him rigth infront of him. But did Vaas care what Hoyt think? No he doesn’t. Not anymore. Once he arrives back to Yara he notices the pictures in their home. A woman with long, loosley braided brown hair. Vaas instantly recognizes her as the woman from his various drug induced trips. Findig out that woman is Mama Castillo, his mother was comforting. And probably for the first time ever, he could relax.

[diveronarpg]

Congratulations, NAY! You’ve been accepted for the role of LAVINIA. Admin Minnie: I’ve always thought Lillian was one of the trickier characters to fully grasp, because it’d be so easy to turn her into an outline of a person and not the whole vivid picture. But you, Nay, have won me over completely. You have such a knack for characterization and nailed Lillian’s voice, that balance she strikes between light and power. The interview portion was my absolute favorite part — I loved the way you brought her to life and the way you showed us the inner workings of her mind, heart and soul. I’m so, so glad to put Lillian into your talented hands! Please read over the checklist and send in your blog within 24 hours.

WELCOME TO THE MOB.

OUT OF CHARACTER

Alias | nay

Age | twenty-two

Preferred Pronouns | she / her

Activity Level | i find it cruelly ironic that i asked for time away from the roleplay community to try to make sense of my chaotic life, and a couple of weeks later, the world imploded and now we’re all quarantined. somehow, i’ve got my shit together-ish. and i really sorely need the light that is the DV fam in these trying times, however, so. 8/10, i’d say?

Timezone | gmt+5

How did you find the rp? | i sold my soul to it some time ago~

Current/Past RP Accounts | never RP’ed a day in my life, what’re you talking about?

IN CHARACTER

Character | LAVINIA / lillian wen

What drew you to this character? | titus adronicus isn’t exactly the darkest of shakespeare’s works, but the storyline of lavinia in particular happens to be one that has always been brutally impactful to me. there is this absolutely fascinating dichotomy lavinia depicts through her journey in the play, one between honor & freedom, that keeps me up at night sometimes. and when it comes to lillian, that struggle feels embedded in her story just the same. regardless, i don’t know that it’s possible to not be drawn to lillian wen.

there’s a multitude of aspects that keeps me inescapably besotted with her — the foundation upon which she blossomed from child, to girl, to the woman she is; an aura of a true, chatoyant aesthete; a plot arc of sexual assault survival, used as a steppingstone towards advocacy… but most of all, i think what won out was the soul she’s got, and all the light it bleeds. there is a line in her biography that reads: “belief was a powerful thing in the wen household.” i’ve thought about that line for daaaays, honestly. it was that line that really got me with her, because i could already see it in my head: she was raised by two women—artistic, emotional, intellectual, opinionated women—and they taught her belief as a religion. she was raised to know it was the most useful weapon she could ever have in an admittedly dastardly world; faith, in herself & in the power of light, and hope, and living in one’s truth. to be raised that way, and make what she has of herself, to wind up in a loveless, strategic marriage and part of a mob? she is such an intriguing character, with such insurmountable potential for growth.

there is something about lillian’s devout optimism, which doesn’t deserve to be mistaken for naiveté, & a faith in humanity that bolsters me, reminding me a fair amount of the sweetness i’ve always adored in juliana, and how there is more than one way to be a fighter, which is exactly what lillian is. but i also think that aspect in a discordant war-time setting would be so god damn cool to play with, because it prompts questions: how far does being good get you? is anything really in black & white? what does a limit feel like? what could you break open to let the light in? i’d love a chance to find answers through an unravelling of her story.

What is a future plot idea you have in mind for the character? | 

NOTE: here’s the ever-present disclaimer that these are all merely ideas, subject to discussion & changes, able to be altered in collaboration with other characters.

{ 1 } GILDED CAGE — a corrupt, mob-allegiant District Attorney for a fiancé; there is no question that it is to a man of power her mothers have intertwined her future, seeing protection for the daughter who is their whole world in the bloodbath tainting the city that is their home. to cassian bhatt, lillian is a nothing more than an accessory. of course, she had never been raised to be a girl who emptily dreamt of an ideal love, not when there was the whole universe to fall in love with, and no end to the every day magic the people it brimmed with had to offer. but a loveless marriage? lillian has never been one to tell lies, only ever to hone an innate ability to make the truth as palatable as possible, and her prospective bond feels like one. would she still go through with it? would she ever be able to say no to two women who never let her want for anything a day in her life?

⋯ cassian is the most obvious plot for her story, so i wanted to tackle him, first & foremost. i’m almost sure that lillian won’t seal the deal; she’s come too far in life to only come so far, and wind up with a man she feels nothing at all for. however, i was reading through cassian’s biography, too, and i would be lying if i said i couldn’t see potential for lillian to both either love, or something to cause friction in their dynamic, even if it isn’t a necessarily pleasant sort. currently, i know that lillian refuses to do more than hollowly tolerate him, purely because he has been forced upon her, and her general distrust of men in the wake of her assault makes her anything but open to him. can we really deny that he’s a smart, capable, clever man, though? there could be spark. it could turn to a catalyst for growth in multiple ways, positive & negative, and i am dying to explore the many different ways their story could unfold. 

{ 2 } WHAT IS LOVE? — what if she does marry cassian bhatt? it is a possibility, after all. with the capulets, she has found a voice. she has a platform, she has causes she believes in & actively fights for, and a marriage wouldn’t bar lillian from any of that, nor would it keep her from being the precocious, curious creature that she is. and what if, after that’s done, she falls in love with someone? with her mothers never having been married, lillian never considered romantic love & legally-binding commitment to go hand-in-hand, but that does not mean it couldn’t. it doesn’t mean she couldn’t fall in love with a person she might, one day, want to be with. would she cross that line, if it came down to it? would cassian let her? would the capulets object to it, considering it is her relationship with him that has drug lillian into their fold?

⋯ this is more a subplot to the last than it is a standalone arc, but roll with it. lillian is, in a way that is one of my absolute favourite things about her, a delicious enigma of a woman. i don’t believe there is anything she couldn’t turn and look at from another side. and at the same time? i feel that she is a person who takes notions of integrity, and promises, very seriously. she is a woman of her word, at the end of the day. what would it take to blur her lines? you don’t choose who you fall in love with. you don’t choose when it happens, or how it happens. what you control is your actions, and lillian has both always believed that, and demonstrated it. so, what would she choose, in such a circumstance?

{ 3 } BEST LAID PLANS — she met cosimo capulet whilst on cassian’s arm, and it was over a glass of rosé, the man talked to her about her charity-work. he told her of the origins of the capulets’ particular brand of business: the robin hood reminiscent legacy initiated by one lucius capulet, of the revolution they had begun with, giving back to the impoverished lillian fought for as well. her mothers never would have understood how the good girl they had raised could level with a mob-boss, but lillian has, and it is how she has ended up a consultant to the capulets. but how far is she willing to integrate herself with their cause? how much of the necessary violence of a war can she truly stomach?

⋯ i told you: a dichotomy between honor & freedom. it feels like the crux of lillian’s story to me. i’ve got very strong headcanons in mind for the relationship she’s got with the capulets, purely because i would like for her relationship with them to stand on its own, as opposed to being more so reliant on the relationship her fiancé has with them. the fact that the capulets have given her a voice means a great deal to lillian, definitely more than she ever could have expected it to, and i would like to see that graciousness she’s developed drive her to make choices she might question under the lens of her own honor-code afterwards. you know me, i’m a sucker for internal conflict to drive character development, and i need it with lillian, for sure.

Are you comfortable with killing off your character? | honestly? i don’t think i could stomach lillian dying.

IN-DEPTH

♦ IN-CHARACTER INTERVIEW: 

NOTE: out of caution, i’d like to precede this portion with trigger warnings for sexual assault mention and ptsd                              

                              “benvenuti!” 

she is already greeting you before she’s quite done opening the door. welcome, is what must remind you that you are, in fact, a stranger in her house. the warmth the curve of her mouth radiates is one that seeps in through your pores; it is not easy to remember that this is the first time you’ve met signora lillian wen. you’ve heard it before: like the sun, she is hard to look at, yet her warmth is undeniable. 

“come in,” she invites, and the silken slip-dress she’s donned seems to ripple like peach-hued water when she sweeps her arm, waiting for you to step over the threshold and stand beside her, so she might match you, footstep-for-footstep.

— What is your favorite place in Verona?  

“that’s such a deliciously difficult question,” lillian enthuses, beaming, despite her brows that furrow in thought over it. favourite, after all, is no small word; she must ponder it, then, for she does so like to mean the things she says. “ – you know, i don’t know that i’ve only the one,” is what she settles on, pouring out the lemonde she’s fixed up a pitcher of herself just now. the smell of the mint leaves she’s peppered it with infuses itself in the house, and she can’t help but breathe it in, deeply, satisfied. 

“so much of this city is so very dear to me. i cannot give you a favourite between them all, not when they’ve their own charms, and my own memories attached to them,” she slides over a glass to you, ice cubes merrily tinkling within,  “but i will tell you that the oldest shall always be the home i grew up in. it was more snug than this, perhaps, yes, but my mothers made sure it brimmed with all that feeds the human soul. there isn’t a memory under that roof that does not make my heart ache with nostalgia, which, really, is the heart’s way of telling you it was worth it. don’t you agree?” 

lillian clicks her tongue against the roof of her mouth, a sound of regret that does not match the soft radiance of her mouth. 

“humble beginnings, hmm?”

— What does your typical day look like?

the living-room is far from lacking pieces of furniture, all of them as comfortable to sit in as they are to look at. you know this, because she has suggested you try each out to settle on a preference, and you’ve done it. it is only once your stomach hurts from laughter incited from such childish wonderfulness that you realise: she has broken the ice.

lillian herself sprawls out on a chaise lounge by the window, tipped on her side with her legs curled underneath herself. she looks like a mermaid. her words sound lyrical when her laughter laces them: “ah, always the same, and also never as well.”

the sip of lemonade is delicate, brief, though she tips the glass for a second, fuller mouthful when you’re sure she can’t possibly have swallowed the first that quickly. never mind –

“i like to start my day rising with the sun,” she tells you. “my absolute favourite thing about living by myself is the luxury of not having to speak at all until i wish to do so – which, of course, doesn’t take too long at all, for i might be my own fondest companion. i like to prepare my own breakfast, after; eat outside, if i want, though i rather rebelliously might crawl back into bed with a tray when i feel particularly blue. i never stay under the covers for too long, however. i simply can’t. there’s too much to do. so, i dress myself up in whatever ensemble feels the most myself that day, and set off to find another way to save the world.”

her nose crinkles when she grins. you cannot help grinning back, can you?

— What has been your biggest mistake thus far? 

unbidden, lillian’s mind whirls so quickly, her thoughts slip from her fingers like water. and she is back there, in that room, with that man. that man who smiled when she walked into the room. who smiled when he motioned her to costumery that felt divine to touch, silken & decadent. who smiled when he called her a vision. who smiled when he held her down, while she begged, when he left her on the ground.

believing that smile, she thinks.

          “ ––– signora?” you ask, tone tender, for she looks so fragile when she is still.

as if a button has been pushed, lillian seems to snap out of it – appears to back to life. there is an apology in her smile, and it feels like a shadow. the shadow darkens her words: “to call one the biggest seems like tempting fate, doesn’t it?” she wonders aloud. “such as when one says things can’t possibly get any worse, and right then, the universe shows you how wrong you were about that?”

— What has been the most difficult task asked of you? 

cassian bhatt. the syllables of his name sit at the tip of her tongue, burning, and lillian cannot say them. she cannot betray her mothers so. she knows, already, the looks on their faces would ache more—inevitably, unbearably more—than that of letting her jaw clench, and teeth grind, to keep that truth inside, until she swallows it down.

there can be more than one truth, lillian knows. she reminds herself: once, twice, three times. and then, over the rim of her glass, she smiles a smile she can mean. “that isn’t a mindset i agree with,” she states, “if you believe it is the most difficult, it might feel near impossible, might it not? that just won’t do. forget most difficult–” she sweeps it away with a wave of her hand, like a makeshift broom-limb, “–let’s only say we’ve all got our challenges, and we aren’t the most enthusiastic to rise to all of them.” 

she breathes a laugh, then. “my maman likes to remind me; mind over matter, petit fleur. i can hear it in my head already!”

— What are your thoughts on the war between the Capulets and the Montagues?

lillian’s brows crawl up her forehead. she looks so perplexed, you can’t help but wonder if you accidentally said a word wrong. her home is easy to relax inside, involuntarily, and the possibility would not be unfounded. she explains it herself, all the same, when she asks: “is it a war?”

it is difficult to discern whether the question is rhetorical or not. her head cants, and she answers it herself, “h.g. wells once wrote: if we don’t end war, war will end us.” her sip is pensive, now. “i believe that, truly. there are no winners; only those who are left in the wake of one. and so, i can only hope that is not what this is.”

her eyes are kind. “don’t you?”

♦ EXTRAS: 

✴ pinterest → here;

✴ tag → here.

[rnisa]

Dating Envy Headcanons (part 1 because this has been in my drafts and I don’t feel like finishing it right now)

🦎 Fullmetal Alchemist 🦎

🦎 SFW 🦎

To celebrate me breathing life back into this blog and opening it up to multiple fandoms I'm in, I decided to start by writing for everyone's favourite-to-hate Homunculus, Envy.

This is my first time writing for FMA, so I'll do my best. I'm currently rewatching both 2003 & Brotherhood at the same time, as I loved both series equally. Enjoy! Also, I will generally use they/them pronouns when referring to Envy. If you ask me for 2003 specific, the pronouns will be male, and if you ask me for Brotherhood specific, the pronouns will be gender neutral. This is due to how differently Envy is presented in both shows.

Listen I... I tried to make these cute and romantic but it's fuckin' Envy! That would be too out of character. ANYWAYS I hope these aren't too depressing :,)

Honestly in my opinion, the BEST time to meet/get close with Envy is when they're reduced to the small lizard/work form. I know it's unfair, but seeing as how they can and will kill you in a second... I can see this as one of the, maybe three ways. Envy is vulnerable and if you're in possession of them, very easy to talk to for more than a minute without getting murdered.

So let's imagine instead of May, YOU're in possession of this little green lizard. We've been shown that this small stature doesn't change Envy's shit personality... they'll still do what they can to manipulate you at any turn. We've also been shown their refusal to talk which can be annoying, but with enough time spent with each other (yes, more than three episodes) I can see Envy opening up. By enough time I'm talking...a straight up year of him being a worm.

You have to be strong mentally and do most of the talking/prying. Persistence will get you places. And Envy is...kind of dumb (in Brotherhood), so Envy will be prone to slipping up from time to time.

Over the course of you getting to know each other, Envy will largely remain observant. He'll watch how you interact with other humans when you bring him out (like a bloodthirsty pet?), when you leave him at home in his container he'll make smartass comments about your day.

The two of you form an aggressive bond. They become a shitty roommate you want to get rid of, but they keep you from being depressively lonely so you let it stick around. Much like their appearance in this form, Envy is a bit of a parasite. Both of you are rude to each other , but you always say something sweet and Envy listens, at first, displaying a quick glimpse of humanity before reverting back to his old self, and insulting you.

Compliments are a quick yet tricky way to really mess with Envy's head. On one hand, they're like "well yeah...Why wouldn't you say that nice thing to me?" but on the other hand, it something that's just really hard for them to believe. If you told Envy you like their eyes, like their wit... they'll be stumped. It's like not even in a flustered type of way just, confusion.

It becomes addicting, sort of like a drug. They want your approval - yes, even though you're human.

It's kind of bad, isolating Envy like that but I mean they did start an entire war causing the genocide of a whole lot of people so, this being terrible aside,

Envy asks questions, hopes you'll help them understand. Envy can't feel love like a normal person would - it's past the point of that, too late, really. Envy wouldn't know that sort of love but, it's more like a "tolerance."

Envy TOLERATES you. Envy can stomach you because you're the only person that doesn't make them sick. Envy can be themself around you, and, over the course of a few months, has been honest and expressed their thoughts. Being around you is easy and requires no effort.

However, Envy doesn't like that they can't control you. You know them by now, to not fall for their tricks. Still, you have not posed them any threat so Envy lets it slide.

I firmly believe Envy could never understand love. Their being is made from jealousy and there is no "high" for that. When you're always envious of something, or someone, it's a shitty feeling. Envy can never love themself, and can never love anyone but what they feel for you, is as *close* as it can possibly get.

The relationship wouldn't be an easy, or a healthy one. There's no beneficial reason for you to be with them but hey, love is love!

Over time, you feel like Envy genuinely likes and appreciates you. You feel a connection and whether you let them go free, or they escape... Once Envy can obtain their "real" body back, you won't see them for a while. In that form, anyways...

Envy will come by to "check" on you, in different forms. You won't know it's Envy - but you've got a hidden, shapeshifting stalker. You preoccupy most of their thoughts, they can't get enough ... they also can't figure out how to approach you. Envy is confused. There are many routes this could take but I'm settling for the one where Envy kidnaps you, and keeps YOU a hostage, just as you did for them when they were reduced to their small, lizard-like form.

I don't see Envy as a sexual person, inherently. If you wanted it eventually, you'll have to explain and show them (literally, show them what genitals look like bc I can't imagine envy has a fuckin clue LOL) and see how it goes from there. I don't think Envy would be interested unless you get real kinky and include heavy BDSM aspects. 

Even talking to someone else, paying anyone other than him the slightest bit of attention makes him sick. Be careful. Once Envy’s obsessed with you, and you reacted positively to his advances, even a little bit...you belong to him. Whether you like it or not. Either he has you.. or no one does.

[beyondthetemples-ooc]

And on TODAY’S episode of “RHS overanalyzes every little detail about Raven’s existence”....

If Raven’s soul-self protects her from pathogenic illness, and she doesn’t just have A Serious Immune System: it’s an astral protection, somehow. Through some mysterious mechanism, Raven’s soul-self (specifically named as the functional component in this mechanism) prevents “disease” from affecting her.

Yet also canonically doesn’t protect her from the pains she absorbs, or the effects of a bad drug trip. She can’t “absorb” a “disease” from someone else.

Conclusion: it’s specifically Illness-Causing Microorganisms it protects her from, exclusively those In Her Own Body Only.

So I started wondering: What about her gut flora?

Like, you know: natural microorganisms? The built-in bacteria that help with digestion, immune health, stress tolerance, inflammation, and probably a whole lot more we just haven’t discovered yet?

I mean, I’m the fucking adult Poster Child for it, but empaths are Known to Have Digestive Struggles when they’re overwhelmed / not grounding / generally just Being Empaths Around Other People. She probably needs all the good gut health she can get.

But anyways, how does the whole “my soul-self protects me from illness” thing work? Because obviously it doesn’t indiscriminately kill microrganisms or cells. 

Obviously, she has a human digestive system (she does eat, and she does canonically have Blood Type O, which Requires Intestinal Digestion to carry nutrients.)

I mean, arguably you could say demons don’t need gut flora. 8F But even cats and dogs are known to need healthy gut flora. (It’s a Big Thing in modern veterinary studies lately. Also a commonly-prescribed treatment for recurrent digestive distress.) Herbivores are known to need A Lot More gut flora to help break down plant matter (and she IS vegetarian in the 80′s comics), so she can’t rely entirely on digestive enzymes and juices.

How does an astral form discern Healthy Cells from Invading Cells?

Does she get sick if she gets a transfusion of A/B/AB blood types? Is Raven immune to germs in ALL regions, planets, and dimensions? Food poisoning? What about bad cellular developements in her own body? Nerve damage? Autoimmune disorders? Cancer?

As far as my personal headcanon goes: Yes, she’s immune to all of that. Her body IS in a human shape; though she DOES exist separately, her body and soul are STILL both connected parts of her. If her soul gets corrupted, so does her body. If her body gets corrupted, so does her soul. Obviously, they’re connected. And canoically: her soul protects her body. And what is her soul? “The part of her that is Trigon.” So: Her soul comes from an interdimensional conqueror, and obviously he couldn’t be stopped by a bacteria from another dimension crippling him for life. So by hereditary necessity: she has a more ferocious immune system that conquers a wider, stronger range of bodily invaders.

Really, the only reason humans get “sick” is WAY more from our own immune response than what the germs ACTUALLY do to our bodies. Fever, whole slews of digestive issues, body aches, sweating and chills-- they’re all caused by our brain going, “this doesn’t belong here. We’re going to try getting rid of it! INCREASE THE TEMPERATURE; kill it with fire! Increase bloodflow, thus bringing in more troops to kill it! Increase sleep to batten down our energy reserves!” You know: The things we identify as “getting sick”. It’s actually our own body doing that. The only invaders that ACTUALLY make us sick are internal parasites eating our food and causing malnutrition, microbes that cause nerve damage (and even that’s more often caused by High Fever than directly from microbes), and viruses like rabies that actually alter the way neurology and brain functions work. Most of our Symptoms are just from the way OUR BODIES REACT to microbes, not caused by the microbes themselves!!

So what I’m saying is, maybe Raven doesn’t “get sick” because her immune system JUST “destroys” the invader, without her brain centers going, “there’s A Disease here, so we’re going to try killing it by inflaming the area, raising the body temp, and generally making the body feel gross”. She doesn’t have that in her DNA. Maybe it doesn’t take a lot of energy to destroy the invaders for her. Or maybe it takes more to do it without the help from Brain Stuff-- but it gets that energy from her immense astral reserves rather than her body.

I mean, if the girl can teleport between dimensions, suck neurological signals (pain and inflammation) into herself and basically force someone else’s body to Stop Experiencing That and Feel Better, channel the power of both Trigon and a thousand souls plus an almost-goddess through her body, and generally defy physics in a great many mystical ways? She’s got a LOT of energy.

A little thing like “destroy 1-20 microscopic cellular or viral things that Are Recognized by The Body as Don’t Belong There” doesn’t seem so far-fetched. Hell, regular HUMANS are capable of that; we just have bodies that Give Us Symptoms because it takes us a goddamn 1-14 days to do!

What I’m saying is, I think her immune system is Magically Enhanced and her neurology is Different, so it’s probably doing all the same Recognition and Identification of Intruders that our regular immune systems do. Just, super buffed up so it’s faster and doesn’t require Fever or Inflammation to do it.

This is one of those things i’m Kinda Burning to ask Marv Wolfman about, but on the other hand, Suspension of Disbelief is a thing.I’m just, yeah, hi medical student here, and a Curious one at that........

[sage-selfships]

Sage H. D. - Bully Self-Insert

This is my Self-Insert for Bully/Canis Canem Edit! I made the art myself and would appreciate if you didn’t use it! The Template was created by Silkvale and found here! I will post updated versions to @kitty-selfshipping so uhm yeah, follow that blog to read it when it’s totally finished or edited.

If you are interested in reading the current info about my Bully Self-Insert, please read under the cut!

Biographical Information Full Name [& Pronunciation] - Sage Holland Drage ( S AI J ) ( H AW - l uh n d ) ( d r ai j ) Meaning - Herb or Prophet, Ridgeland, Dragon Set Age - 14-15 Certified Birthdate - 12 January 1992 (not my real birth year, but shh) Astrological Sign -  Capricorn Pronouns - They/them or He/Him Aliases & Preferred Nicknames – Dumbbell - Sage might not actually like the nickname, but Mandy WIles insist on calling Sage it whenever Mandy sees Sage, so Sage is  Dragon - As some people may not be able to pronounce Sage’s surname, Sage just call themselves Dragon to make it easier for everyone. Ms. Shy - Even though Sage prefers to go by he/him or they/them pronouns, people insist on calling them ms, and many people consider them shy because of how they seem terrified of new people Puppy - A nickname Sage got from Kirby Olsen, that they claim matches their general personality Ethnicities Distant Descendants : American, British,  Dominant Descendants : Norwegian, Swedish, Danish Physical Description Hair Color - Brown Eye Color - Blue Weight – Height - Typical Clothing Wear :  Maroon or pink vest, purple skirt, blue bow, purple bow, pink shoes - School   uniform  Red stained dress and blonde wig - Halloween costume, that is supposed to resemble Carrie White from the movie Carrie Faux fur coat, faux fur ushanka - Winter attire Figure/Build - Distinguishing Features/Scars/ or Birthmarks – A mole just over their lip Explain: Tattoos: Piercings: Frequently Worn Jewelry: Choker belt around their neck Personal Information Current Living Arrangements - Sage currently lives with three of their American relatives, but also they technically live at Bullworth, in the girl’s dorm Originated from - Vestfold, Norway Traveled Territories - Hobbies -   Fears – Spiders, snakes, insects, heights, scarecrows, most of the jocks Religion/Beliefs – Atheist Why?: Sage grew up in an atheist family, as simple as that. Health Behaviors Physical Ailments/ Disabilities/ Issues – Addiction(s) [Sex, Drugs, Smoking, Alcohol, Other]  Why?: Any regular medication taken? – Medication for their Iron Deficiency and for their Hives Chronological Information Profession - Student Likes - Dislikes - Goals/Ambitions – Most Instructive/Painful/Memorable Experience - Story behind experience: Weapons/Equipment - Sage mostly fights using their hands but can use a baseball if they need to Personal Attributes Personality - Strengths - Weaknesses - Good Habits - Bad Habits - Fetishes/Strange Behaviors - Stereotype - Shy kid with few friends As you know them better(and you like them) : As you know them better(and you hate them) :   Ratings on Personal Qualities (don't go overboard make reasonable stats for your character) Physical Strength : 4/10 Sage might not regularly train, but surprisingly Sage is stronger than they seem Attractive : 5/10 Sage doesn’t consider themselves the most beautiful and mostly blames it upon their parents and grandparents for how they look Honesty : 7/10 Sage hates lying in general, but still does lie if they need to. Rule Abiding : 3/10 Sage thinks certain rules are to be broken and others are to be broken. Sociability : 3/10 Sage is quite shy when it comes to meeting new people, but if they muster up enough confidence they can make new friends. Bullworth Academy Information Reason for enrolling: Sage has lacked disiplince and Sage’s parents had relatives that lived close Bullworth, so they decided on sending them to a Clique - Standing and Rank in Social Circle  - Room Number – 4 Roommate(s)-  Zoe Taylor & Beatrice Trudeau Favourite Subject(s) – English,  & Art Why?: Sage loves English because they’ve felt so motivated and  Least Favorite Subject(s) – Why?: Favourite Teacher – Mr. Galloway & Mrs. Philips Why?: Mr. Galloway - Sage takes a liking to Mr. Galloway, mostly because he encouraged and gave Sage a warm welcome to the school, during Sage’s first day at Bullworth Mrs. Philips - Sage got a few compliments Least Favorite Teacher –  Mr. Slawter Why?: Sage is quite afraid of Mr. Slawter, mostly because he yelled at Sage during their first class Knowledgeability Language(s) – Norwegian, English Schooling Level - Grade 8-9, Expertise – Chemistry - Math - English - Geography - Sage knows a few things, like where certain European countries are, but after that, nothing more Politics/Law - Economy - Cooking/Culinary - Shop - Botany/Biology - Mythology - high / Sage knows a lot about Norrøn Mythology and enjoys learning more and more about it Art - high / Sage highly enjoys Art and feels that they know a lot about the rules about realism and perspective Photography - Sage knows how to use a camera, and what settings look good or not, so they consider themselves at a 5/10 Reading Level - Overall Intelligence Level(s) - Interpersonal and Naturalistic. Relationships Statuses   (once you list characters here, delete them from the other list near the end of this information sheet, makes things less confusing) (Also, please describe the relationships of your character with other characters) Trusted Companions Closest Friend(s) –   Milliz - “I trust her with my life. Nothing more or less to say. And might I add that her and Earnest are really freakiNG ADOREABLE?” (Jeg beklager ikke for at du er satt på denne lista, Milliz) Friend(s) -   Kirby Olsen - Despite Kirby being a jock and Sage being afraid of most of the jocks, Kirby and Sage are pretty close and    

Hated Rivals Worst Enemies – Intolerable Students - Harmless Acquaintances Tolerated Students - Tolerated Townsfolk - Hot Encounters Hinted Attractions - Crush(es) - Lover(s) - Gary Smith, Jimmy Hopkins and Petey (Ey, don’t judge me please or make comments about this please, I just ship myself with all of them :( I will also make like another post or tweet where I just describe everything from lore to headcanons about this ) Ex(s) - None Extra Information Eating Habits Omnivore/Carnivore/Herbivore – Favorite Food(s): Favorite Drink(s): Disliked Food(s): Disliked Drink(s): Added Information Proclaimed Theme Song(s) - Either Dancing Queen by ABBA or Scent – Favourite Color: Favourite Season: Favourite Animal: Sage  Favourite Music Genre: Sage can’t really choose, but they are very fond of country and Pop Most Memorable Quote – Various Quotes Through Interaction :  “ Walking around – “I sure hope Mandy was joking when he called me a dumbbell...” “I don’t know jack dritt about math, how am I supposed to get a good grade?” “Gary mentioned something about rats, wondered what he was on about.” “I’m considering joining a clique... but which one?” “ “ “ “ When the fire alarm goes off – “Stuff like this always happens when you least expect it.” “Sure hope this isn’t a drill, I don’t want my slippers to get wet again without reason.” Greetings Good Terms: “Hiya!” “Hey there, best friend!” “How ya doing, sweetie?” “How are you doing, buddy?” “Hey, anyhting fun happen recently?” “Bro! What’s up?” “Heisann!” (Norwegian for ‘Hey there’) Bad Terms: “Please leave me alone” “I rather not talk.” “Ew.” “Get out of my face!” “Leave me alone!” “Continue being around me and I’ll beat you up! Or cry!” Saying goodbye – Good Terms: “Have a good day! “See you later!” “Hope you have a good night!” Bad Terms: “”See you in Hell, I uhm mean class.” “Leave already.” “I’m getting a headache, gotta go.” “Byyeee, see you never.” When Flirted With – Good Terms: “I uhm...” “Thank you....” “Well I uhm, thank you so much! I uhm haha, we should hang out or something!” “I feel flattered. I’ll uhh have to go over there until the blushing stops.” “Continue acting this sweet and you’re going to be getting ladies really quickly.” “ “You’re such a sweetheart!” “If I were of age, I would marry you right here on the spot, but I’m still too young.” Bad Terms: “I wouldn’t say I don’t like you, but I’m not that interested.” “Not to be rude, but no.” “That better not be trying to make me blush, because it didn’t work at all.” “ “

Watching a fight – “I know I shouldn’t watch this crap, but damn it feels so right, right now!” “ Attacking – “I’m sorry!” “I have no choice in this situation, so I apologize beforehand!” “I learnt this one from my friend!” While Fighting – “I really wish it didn’t have to end with one of us being hurt!” “Ouch! Thanks, I guess!”

Chasing someone – “You can run, but you can also hide!” “Come back here! please...!” Out of breath – “This always happens....” “Why do I have to have iron deficiency? When hidden from – “ Knocked out – “ Stinkbomb explodes – “I can’t see shit!” “I should be happy I can’t smell anything from before!” Opinions on students who reside at Bullworth Academy– (in alphabetical order) Bullies   Davis White: Ethan Robinson: Russell Northrop: Tom Gurney: Trent Northwick: Troy Miller: Wade Martin: Zoe Taylor: Greasers Hal Esposito: Johnny Vincent: Lefty Mancini: Lola Lombardi: Lucky De Luca: Norton Williams: Peanut Romano: Ricky Pucino: Vance Medici: Jocks Bo Jackson: Casey Harris: Damon West: Dan Wilson: Juri Karamazov: Luis Luna: Mandy Wiles: Ted Thompson: Nerds Algernon Papadopoulos: Beatrice Trudeau: Bucky Pasteur: Cornelius Johnson: Donald Anderson: Earnest Jones: Fatty Johnson: Melvin O'Connor: Thad Carlson: Non-Cliques Angie Ng: Christy Martin: Constantinos Brakus: Eunice Pound: Gloria Jackson: Gordon Wakefield: Ivan Alexander: Karen Johnson: Lance Jackson: Melody Adams: Pedro De La Hoya: Ray Hughes: Sheldon Thompson: Trevor Moore: Preppies Bif Taylor: Bryce Montrose: Chad Morris: Derby Harrington: Gord Vendome: Justin Vandervelde: Parker Ogilvie: Pinky Gauthier: Tad Spencer: Opinion on Adults who teach and patrol at Bullworth Academy – (in alphabetical order) Miss Danvers: Miss Peters: Mr. Galloway: Mr. Luntz: Mr. Matthews: Mr. Wiggins: Mrs. Carvin: Mrs. MacRae: Mrs Peabody: Ms. Phillips: Neil: Prefects – Edward Seymour II: Karl Branting: Max MacTavish: Seth Kolbe: Opinions on People in the cities of Bullworth – (in alphabetical order) Townies Clint(aka Henry): Sage doesn’t like saying it, but they’re quite afraid of him and  Duncan: Edgar Munsen: Gurney: Jerry: Leon: Omar Romero: Otto Tyler: Residents in the city of Bullworth – Bethany Jones: Denny: Dr. Bambillo: Krakauer: Mihailovich: Miss Abby: Mr. Brekindale: Mr. Buckingham: Mr. Castillo: Mr. Doolin: Mr. Huntingdon: Mr. Johnson: Mr. Martin: Mr. Ramirez: Mr. Salvatore: Mr. Smith: Mr. Sullivan: Ms. Rushinski Mrs. Lisburn: Osborne:

[imagines-so-what-if]

O is for Opportunity of Parenthood

Headcanons for Sherlock, Mycroft, and Moriarty

The prompt: How are they as parents?

Genre: Fluff / Humor

Rating: K+

SHERLOCK MASTERLIST

Headcanons for Sherlock as a father:

He is p r e p a r e d.

Or at least he thinks he is.

He’s read every book he could get his hands on, watched an assortment of documentaries and youtube videos, and consulted with John no less than thirty times before the baby comes along. He absolutely thinks he is ready to be a dad by the time it happens.

He is not.

Is not prepared at all.

Why are they crying?

Why are they throwing everything?

W h a t is going on??

What do you mean they cry just for attention? You mean he has to hold them how often?!

On the plus side waking up in the middle of the night for a crying baby is not an issue at all. Sherlock already has a wacked up sleep schedule so it’s likely he’ll still be up when the baby starts crying.

He’ll be a little overwhelmed at first, and cite books he’s read over and over. He won’t trust in your instincts right away (but he’ll learn quick when you’re the one who calms the baby down).

He will not do baby talk.

He will not hide his experiments (but he’ll keep the dangerous stuff away for obvious reasons).

He will definitely show the kiddo decapitated nuns when you’re not looking.

He’s not one for censorship. Never will be. He encourages for his children / kiddo to learn everything possible and he won’t hide anything from them.

That being said he’s super wary of other children. What if they call his baby a freak? You’ll have to be there to reassure him that everything will be okay.

(You’ll probably have to reassure him semi-frequently that he’s a good dad, because Sherlock will have his moments of doubts and heaven forbid that child ever says that s/he hates Sherlock because oh that’s gonna hurt).

(Also if someone does bully your baby Sherlock will absolutely seek retribution / justice. Even if it’s another child because that’s his baby).

Sherlock does not handle puberty well at all.

Be prepared for lots of arguments between the two, and dealing with two sulky people in the home.

(But they’ll both love you so much)

First dates / kisses / sex / etc will make Sherlock uncomfortable and he’ll probably scare off the first few attempts with his blunt attitude. He’ll definitely do some background checks, too.

Bi, straight, gay, asexual… none of that matters to him.

School isn’t that important to Sherlock. He won’t be the one to encourage his children to finish school if they have something else they want to do. Sherlock is all for letting them do as they please when it comes to their dreams / jobs / professions. As long as they’re happy.

That being said if it’s dangerous then he’ll get antsy and keep tabs on them.

(Although you know John’s gonna make sure this kiddo knows how to defend him/herself)

He’ll be proud at whatever it is they do, because they’re his kids.

(but if they become a detective like him then he’s a giddy, giddy boy)

He’ll stumble a bit as a father (especially during hormonal times like angsty teens), but he’ll sincerely love ‘em and want their happiness.

He hopes they like him, too.

Headcanons for Mycroft being a father

He’ll have a nanny for the kiddo. With his job being the way it is, he knows it’ll be hard on you to raise a kiddo (mostly) by yourself, so he’ll insist on hiring a nanny to at least help out.

(If you’re adamant about no nannies, he’ll comply, but please be prepared for the fact that Mycroft can only make so much time to spend at home).

He’s borderline over-prepared for the baby. He’s got doubles of everything in case something happens, has memorized every baby book he could find, and already has a list of professional tutors and doctors on standby. His kiddo is going to have everything s/he could ever need/want.

(To be honest he’s a little scared at being a dad because he struggles to simply act normal, and deal with other humans. You’re the exception, not the rule, and he’s worried he’ll estrange his own child. Please comfort and encourage him, because of course this man will be a good father)

Mycroft is a firm believer in a structured environment. That means getting his bundle of joy on a schedule as soon as possible (this is also so that way Mycroft can work his schedule around his child’s schedule so he can spend more time with him/her).

Lots of reading, and no T.V.

He’s a bit awkward with physical affection. He knows how to hold his baby, but he’s terrible at playing with him/her.

This kiddo is going to grow up fast. Lots of education right away and it probably won’t come as a surprise that they end up graduating early due to the environment.

Mycroft will be a very proud dad.

He will absolutely show up to as many meets / plays / games / club / tournaments / whatever they’re into as he can. And if he can’t then he’ll have you record it so he can watch it later and discuss with him/her. He’s all for extracurricular activities and wants to have an active role in his child’s life.

Will not tolerate drug abuse. Any signs of it and they’ll be immediately sent off to a high end rehabilitation program. One of Mycroft’s biggest regrets is not stopping Sherlock before it got out of hand and he will not let that happen to his child.

Mycroft will deal very poorly with teenage rebellion. It’ll put a strain on their relationship, no matter what you do, unfortunately. Mycroft will very likely treat his child like another Sherlock in this case, and be snarky.

He’ll still love ‘em regardless, but he’s done dealing with that kind of stuff and has zero patience left.

He’ll make sure his child can have their dream job, but he’ll be a lot more supportive of financially secure jobs, or more intelligent jobs, than other more unstable things. 

(Please don’t be a detective like Uncle Sherlock. Mycroft will lose his mind and very well may strangle his brother)

First dates / kisses / sex / etc will give Mycroft mild anxiety attacks. They better have the most pristine backgrounds and if he suspects for a second his kid is in danger then he’ll send in the calvary.

Sexuality won’t matter in the slightest bit to him.

He may be a bit more controlling than others when it comes to his kid’s life, but he sincerely only wants what’s best for them. Sometimes he’ll have a hard time seeing that maybe his son/daughter knows what’s best for him/herself, and he’ll need your help with that.

Headcanons for Moriarty as a father

One word: Spoiled.

Moriarty is an eccentric parent. He’s the kind of parent that will feed a baby pop rocks to see what would happen. 

His children will always get what they want, provided they obey him and aren’t a hassle.

His child will be dubbed as Mini-Me. 

He’s got matching outfits. Moriarty will totally wear a dress (and rock it) if he has to in order match outfits with his child.

That baby is his Mini-Me and he LOVES IT.

He will educate his children personally when it comes to music, and he’ll encourage pyromania.

This kiddo is gonna grow up with private tutors, bodyguards, and an assortment of materialistic items.

You’ll have to make sure s/he receives lots of love and discipline so they don’t grow up dissociated, or disillusioned.

Frankly you’ll have to reign Moriarty in at times, too. He can get carried away when it comes to his Mini-Me. His parents were never around, so he wants to make sure his kid is constantly involved in his life. He’ll be quick with the physical affection, and will love  Even bringing him/her into the criminal enterprise ASAP. Like when s/he’s ten s/he’s probably already been introduced to mafia bosses.

(He’ll be persuaded out of this if you’re adamant enough, but you’ll have to really dig your shoes in.)

He will l o v e his Mini-Me, though. He wants his kiddo to live a happy and fulfilling life. He doesn’t want them to be bored easily like him, or wake up and discover the world’s nothing but gray. He’ll do whatever it takes to make sure that doesn’t happen.

Super protective dad. First dates have an honest chance of getting sniped.

This kid can be whatever s/he wants to be. Moriarty does not give a hoot, so long as they’re happy, healthy, and always call him Best Dad In The World.

All the dad jokes.

A L L the pranks. He lives for pranking his kiddo.

[thatlethalsoul]

Total Drama Drunk/Stoner Headcanons

Because I have little to no self-control and because I’m a lonely little stoner that enjoys pushing their interests onto their fandoms, I decided to play off the idea of what our favorite total drama cast members are like when they go out partying.

Note: This list doesn’t include any contestants from Season 6 (Pahkitew Island) or anyone from the Ridonculous Race. Some characters might be missing as well, but I tried to include as many as possible. All underage characters on this list are assumed to be of age when consuming the described substances. This list will also not include any headcanons involving the use of “hard drugs” such as heroine, meth, cocaine, etc as the OP does not approve of any use of such drugs due to their highly addictive and dangerous nature.

Chris and Chef like to go out drinking together on their days off. They’ll usually both go for either high-end beers or expensive cocktails and talk shit with each other all night long. They also brainstorm new torture methods challenges over drinks all the time. Chris doesn’t usually smoke, but his best challenge ideas have come from the few times he has.

A lot of the Total Drama teens end up enjoying recreational drinking out at parties, Geoff and his bros especially included. They bring the booze. Geoff holds the group record for best keg stand.

Bridgette doesn’t drink, though she’s surprisingly great at mixing cocktails. DJ is always the group DD, and will give literally everyone a ride home unless they say otherwise because don’t dare you lie to me I know you’re not driving yourself home like that.

Heather will slowly sip a cocktail on the side and people watch everyone with Sierra, Alejandro, and/or Justin. Noah will come over sometimes as well, bringing the juiciest gossip from inside the crowd with him.

Owen has the alcoholic endurance of an ox. He could probably down an entire bottle of vodka and still be well enough for more. He usually won’t watch his intake, suddenly crashing out and having to stay over until the next morning. He apologizes furiously whenever this happens and helps clean the place up afterwards though, so nobody really minds.

Izzy gets especially wild and crazy when she’s drunk, and somehow she can hold down booze just as easily as Owen. She'll also sometimes indulge in some mushrooms and ecstasy and will get Owen in on it too (Though when Owen’s involved they just stay home with snacks and watch shitty movies together).

Drinking contests frequently break out between Geoff, Tyler, Trent, Eva, Owen, Izzy, and/or Lightning. Jo and Brick will also get into drinking contests but only between each other. They usually end up in ties with both drinking themselves under the table and puking at the same time.

Sadie and Katie get white girl wasted ridiculously fast. Beth and Lindsey as well. Cody has zero alcohol tolerance and will get shitfaced just 1 shot in.

Leshawna LOVES drunk karaoke. She drags everyone into it, too, and cheers for everyone when they go onstage, no matter how terrible they sound. Harold frequently tries to show up others when he goes up in an attempt to impress her. He’s had to fake that he was drunk a few times because of how horribly he did.

Anne Maria is the biggest dirty dancer of the group, but will also straight up fight anyone if they so much as look at her funny when she’s drunk. She’s gotten herself thrown out of many a bar.

Sam doesn’t drink or smoke (can’t impede on those elite gaming skills, now can we?), but he tags along anyway to keep Dakota(zoid) company when she wants to go out and party. He also helps with damage control if/when she gets a little too rowdy.

Noah likes to gossip and talk shit when he’s drunk, but he also loves to ramble on and on about little known facts and stories of history, literature, and/or science. Everyone laughs as he turns into a walking episode of Drunk History at every party.

Scott has an iron stomach and likes the weirdest, nastiest drinks you can imagine, happily throwing back stuff like the Cement Mixer, New Jersey Turnpike, Prairie Oyster, Smoker’s Cough, and Horse J*zz (beer and milk. I’m not making that up, I swear.). He also brings the weirdest booze with him when he shows up at parties (Shockingly, nobody was interested when he brought his pappy’s homemade dirt pie moonshine...)

Duncan, Gwen, and Courtney make amends after the show and will sometimes smoke weed together when they hang out. They’ve dragged Trent and Cody into their shenanigans as well. Between the five of them they make one whole Breakfast Club.

Dawn gets home-grown weed easy from one of her other Wiccan friends. After Total Drama she formed a real tight friendship with B, so they hang out and smoke together sometimes too. Zoey became pretty good friends with Dawn after the show too, so her and Mike also sometimes share in the fun. They dragged Cameron along once but he got so paranoid and queasy the first time he tried it that they decided it’d be best to leave him out of it from then on.

Whenever Mike gets drunk or high he ends up fluently flip-flopping between himself and his alters all throughout his speech, sometimes even babbling on between himself and the alters on his own tangents. Mal will also come out during this time, but he’s surprisingly chill when he does. It’s easy to tell when Mal is the one in control because of how suddenly quiet Mike gets and how relaxed his expression turns.

[tenderborn]

CARELESS : // considering this AU of the series didn’t really give us a lot in terms of how things happened or came about && it was vague to say the least. && in doing so it gave the possibility for so much worldbuilding && interpretations that i’m going to write them all up here so it can be easily found !! i’ll put my headcanons in here && then put additional headcanons in this post at the end for au’s of the au && thoughts from @purpletechtyrtle​, @mikeybro2k12​ && @sunflowerhearted​

THE START: HOW DID THE MUTANT APOCALYPSE BEGIN ??

the kraang had planned to terraform the planet for their means but instead ended up making the planet uninhabitable for them && unable to be touched for millennia to come. leaving it to fester && become the blistering hot during the day && below freezing during the evening wasteland in its wake.

the M-bomb hung in the air like a sore thumb, clouds hanging around it like a disease as sirens rang through the air as people prepared for the worst. however the worst the city dealt with on a daily basis usually got fixed by their saviors. 

this time it never did. instead it eradicated half the population while mutating the other half. 

those who mutated immediately were able to cope with it, or they died slow over the course of several months since the mutation slowly ate away at the humans && animals it infected. some became mindless, lost to the mutation that ate away at them ( think clickers in left for dead but then also feral ghouls in fallout ) && can sometimes be in small groups roaming the wastelands.

WORLD BUILDING: AFTER THE EXPLOSION WHAT HAPPENED TO THE BOYS ??

basically it’s likely the only two that were around when thing settled were raphael && donnie in metalhead’s body ---- or raphael knowing donnie enough to follow instruction as donnie was dying to help him put his consciousness into metalhead 2.0. michelangelo ran off as well as leonardo did but for different reasons.

michelangelo left due to the assumption his siblings all perished in the explosion ( its likely he was close when it happened but he was a little more forward in some screencaps during one of the flashbacks ) && ran off due to trauma + extra dosage of mutagen to do what he does later in the au. 

leonardo on the other hand wasn’t in the right mind at all due to the secondary mutation he fell under immediately since the e - bomb landed on him as it exploded. upon mutating his first instinct was to run due to a lack of being able to think straight.

all four were separated, two believing the other three were dead while the remaining thinking they were the only ones left, likely. 

SPECIFIC: WHAT HAPPENED TO MIKEY ?? HOW DID HE END UP THAT WAY ??

the mutagen bomb hit but .. things didn’t go as planned — they were all separated for a time mikey assumed all his siblings were lost. however as ‘maximus’ gained more power && following .. he grew curious.

&& at first .. mikey went looking but found him. which .. wasn’t the best all things considered -- ending up captured, betrayed, tortured by a brother who’d lost whom he was — he was driven insane by it yet managed to get out && flee. 

time had passed, mikey had found oasis, why maximus did violent things in an attempt to get what he sought, && created maps for tribes that were curious && was to share yet .. they all ended up getting eradicated. molly brought up a good point earlier stating that it had been a good long while ; there’s a possibility that mikey found new sets of friends && possibly even fell in love.

only for his joy, friends && new family to be killed

he wandered the wasteland, connecting to whom he was but to cope his mind ebbed to forget the torture he endured under his older sibling ; eventually finding chompy && ick again, settling down as a rest stop for people willing to listen to his stories. he’s slightly an unreliable narrator, a little high strung, against being touched without knowing you’re there && jumpy.

over time he became the pet caring mystic that we see him as, sometimes getting the wayward traveler needing support or advice which he provides .. in his interesting way. 

SPECIFIC: WHAT HAPPENED TO RAPH ?? HOW DID HE END UP ALONE WITH DONNIE ??

while leo was the epicenter of mutation ; donnie lost his body && his mind being put into a version of metalhead && with mikey just running off —- raphael got the short straw. his own body was close to the explosion as well && ultimately got a pretty bad brunt of a blast. he lost a huge dosage of his memory but that’s not all he suffered from.

he developed, real quickly due to damage to his body, allodynia which is a severe pain response to touch ; his whole body feels like its on fire sometimes ( all the time ).

raph was found by donnie in his metalhead 2.0 frame && carted off to the lair, doing what he could to mend the damage done to raph’s body ; the mutagen had an adverse affect, seeping into his body && remaining dormant while still causing damage over time. it ultimately damaged his nerves within his body which led to the allodynia && his pain response to forms of touch.

raph, at first, doesn’t really recall who donnie is considering he’s in a robot body when he first sees him again but after careful explanation .. he gets it, he remembers && they sit around the lair for a long time. 

at least until the power went out ; donnie rigs up a generator && spends time with raph fixing up the shell - razor && getting supplies set to move out && search for their siblings. years pass && its when donnie is able to create some better form of armor for raph to wear && not be in pain in too much.

after awhile, they both begin losing hope that their brothers are alive && just stick to surviving instead in the wasteland. 

SPECIFIC: WHAT HAPPENED TO LEO ?? HOW DID HE BECOME MAXIMUS KONG ??

like in the episode, leonardo threw his siblings off the roof to save them --- there was no time to do anything else. they had run out time. however as the m-bomb fell it was supposed to simply hit in - organic beings upon first impact as it fell close to the docks of the city ; however .. leonardo was the brunt of what it fell on. 

leonardo was mutated aggressively fast rather than any of the other humans since he had been the epicenter.  yet he came back to see the damage while attempting to hide in shadow yet what he saw ultimately broke him ---- it destroyed him for failing the people that relied on him. 

the trauma of the change in the first place, the mutation messing with his head && in the back of his mind, his failure to save the city && its inhabitants to death or mutation further ultimately drove leonardo insane && into what we saw as maximus. he originally had run away due to the agony of his mutation ...

however, uuhhhhh, he didn’t die, instead having a secondary mutation && his rage for a certain former jonin ( lookin at you shredder ) turned up to 50 yet it .. had no direction except inward as the now double mutated kid ran out of new york && left the destruction behind only to create MORE in a couple years.

years passed && eventually he was searching for this oasis that seemed to pop up through word of mouth, maximus lost more && more of himself as anger && rage further rose as hope to find it grew harder && he more desperate. 

he eventually forgot who he used to be. he was simply maximus && that’s truly when things became horrid for the wasteland. people went missing, clans were wiped off the map.

all due to mikey’s map.

WORLD BUILDING: WHY NO OTHER TURTLE MUTANTS ??

considering maximus was out for blood to find this map, we were told that many clans && such were eradicated so he could do what he wanted to do for decades. its likely that he destroyed various turtle clans in an attempt to find 1 ) his brothers 2 ) the map for oasis && hence why turtles are some weird barely usual animal to come across when there’s like

a literal badger && bearded dragon clan.

talking to rooks there’s at least three established turtle children left ( and in talking with molly there might be a couple adult turtles in hiding but that’s up to what y’all want to do haha ) in the wasteland that are her children && grew up after escaping maximus’ rampage. 

SPECIFIC: WHATS UP WITH RAPHAEL’S INHALER ??

pretty much for pain. raphael in the blast, after his secondary mutation ended up developing allodynia which is a severe pain response to touch && has to take the inhaler in small dosages to make it easier on his body. with the allodynia its more aggressive in heat, which what he’s in all the time --- he’s in constant pain all the time. 

the need for the pain medication is a constant that he needs to go from really bad pain days to okay days which even then its pretty bad. the armor he wears helps his body kind of cope with the damage underneath but .. he’s not really that good.

hugs ?? painful. get beat up ?? bad. fall out of a vehicle ?? agony. but he manages the best he can — he’s dealt with worse. not having the medication that was developed for a good first 5 - 10 years && it was nearly debilitating but he pushed through the best he could til donnie && could get armor to suit him && cool him down. and then the medication to help it further.

WOLRD BUILDING: MEDICINAL DRUGS ?? HOW DOES RAPH USE THEM ??

well, let me tell you now --- weed is still being made in the wasteland in small communities since some strands can be used for pain ; which is the main purpose then followed by recreational. its not safe to get super high while people are out to murder you for supplies sometimes ..

however the specific medications that are for pain all have some averse affects considering they’re a mix - match of other drugs that were left over throughout the cities that fell with the e - bomb explosion. raph specifically has gone through two sets of drugs before ending up with the current inhaler set he has.

he developed tolerances to the other two from using them too much. Chockers, being the first one he tried --- giving him temporary relief but its one of the more mild pain relievers created in the wasteland but easy to gain tolerance over. 

second medication that raph tried, the most potent && helpful but also giving a nice cool feeling while taking it was Esky --- named so for the feeling it gave when taking it. most gain a slight addiction to it since it gives you a cooling sensation throughout your body, which is nothing like the below freezing temperatures at night that you feel. 

the last && current medication raphael is using is Ripper, which is in the middle ground to chockers && esky but not the worst either, only issue is that in high dosages it can cause hallucinations && further issues. donnie attempts to keep raph from not using them like the others --- but in moderation. 

SPECIFIC: RAPH’S MEMORY PROBLEMS, WHAT’S UP WITH THAT ??

one word. trauma. 

trauma for him being the sudden mutation causing him to have a secondary mutation && get huge in little over a couple months but in the meantime putting too much strain on his body && psychogenic amnesia associated with emotional && physical strain messing him up.

he’s gotten better && worse over the years — donnie’s been attempting to help but likely doesn’t want to open flood gates when raph is barely holding it together as is. what doesn’t help either is the fact that the medicinal drugs he takes can sometimes mess with his memory due to its wasteland made drugs && hallucinations.

MISC && OTHER HEADCANONS: 

CASSANDRA HEADCANONS: x / x / x / x

VIVI / FROSTBITE HEADCANON: x

ROBYN HEADCANON: x

OTHER VERSIONS OF MIKEY’S STORY: x / x  

DONATELLO HEADCANONS: x / x / x

[ofgoldenblood]

I had to take the time to come fangirl in your inbox because I am truly in love with your writing. I read your latest update for the 'more than a ghost au' and you managed to make me commit to the story despite my not shipping Lightstar. It's a true testament to how talented you are. My jaw dropped at the quality of this verse. I think your insight into the inner workings of Jonathan's twisted mind is extraordinary and

your portrayal is nothing short of brilliant. You make him human and it’s all that I could ask for when he is the most misunderstood character in this fandom. I especially look forward to every update of your abo verse and your hooker au since Jalec is my otp. These stories make me genuinely happy and there are no words that could possibly express how grateful my Jalec heart is for having such a wonderful writer pen my favorite pairing. From a fan

First of all, thank you so much for this lovely message. Your words really cheered me up & I loved hearing that you enjoy my portrayal(s). There’s a lot of controversy about Sebastian and it’s always nice to meet someone else who appreciates him, despite his obvious shortcomings & villainy!!Tbh, I will never understand why people watch shows like SH & then non-stop point out ‘bad’ things and complain about the bad guys. If you want drama-free & entirely harmless then maybe you should watch something like Dora the Explorer instead of hating on people who enjoy a good drama-driven story. Drama requires villains or at least people fucking up, otherwise there would be no conflict and conflict (& its resolve) is usually what makes a story thrilling or interesting. I’m sure most of us want drama-free lives, but who wants to WATCH that, really? BUT I AM SORRY FOR RANTING… so I will continue to rant under the cut.

I agree with you that Sebastian is misunderstood, even if most people in this fandom immediately start fuming when someone says that. Because they think misunderstood = poor mistreated little cupcake. That is not what he is. He is a killer, he is cruel & merciless and he knows no remorse for the things he does and the lives he takes. I am not excusing those actions.He is, however, deeply disturbed and a victim of tremendous abuse. He was drugged literally before he was born, with something that altered his very being & gave him no chance to grow up a ‘normal’ boy. His mother abandoned him because the only other choice she saw was to kill him. As far as he knos, she never even considered trying to save him. His father never loved him, called him a monster that nobody could ever love & literally whipped him (& probably other things, lbr). He isolated him from any healthy human contact & effectively stole his entire childhood. This is severe emotional and physical abuse and I wish people would stop disregarding that and instead only focus on the fact that Sebastian kissed his sister.

Valentine turned him into not a soldier but an (almost literally) soulless weapon. He made him the possibly loneliest person alive. I once saw a post in the Seb tag where someone said something along the lines of ‘I can tolerate Valentine but Sebastian is just pure evil and needs to die‘ & it pissed me off so much, because it blatantly disregards the fact that it was Valentine who made Sebastian the way he is. We’ll never know for sure, I guess, if Jon/athan Christopher hadn’t turned out to be a sociopath too (you don’t need demon blood for that), like Maia’s brother Daniel for example, but he certainly wouldn’t have been the monster that we see in the books. I really like drawing the connection to Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein in Seb’s case. The monster - as the Doctor himself calls it - is presented as a vile nightmare that haunts Frankenstein and destroys his life - but really all his negative & frightening features are a result of Frankenstein’s treatment, neglect & horror. He created the monster AFTER bringing a dead person back to life. We don’t know how much of Seb’s cruelty comes from his demon blood& how much is Valentine’s influence, but I like to remind people that warlocks are half demon too, and nobody would go around saying Mag/nus is at least 50% evil.

A key thing about Seb for me is that he doesn’t understand himself. He is literally misunderstood in that way. He’s never had a chance to figure out who he is or what he wants without someone’s influence in his ear (Valentine or Lilith). He grew up with a distorted understanding of right/good & wrong/evil, so how is he supposed to agree with the ‘good guys’ when they say that it is not okay to kill someone who poses a threat to you & your plan (which is, essentially your entire life’s purpose??)? Or that desiring your sister in a way that this society finds wrong is despicable? (We literally can’t even agree here on tumblr how ‘bad’ inc/est is!!) He never experienced love, never received, felt or understood it, so he tries to bind people to him to fight his loneliness any other way possible. He is a drowning man who can’t ever escape the water but desperately struggles to stay afloat, because there is literally no alternative.

When his hate & jealousy for Jace (who is not even Valentine’s real son but somehow ends up getting everything that’s supposed to be Seb’s - his father, the illusion of a childhood, time to develop, Clary, even Jocelyn for a while, a parabatai, LOVE) threatens to destroy him, he turns them into the opposite and starts obsessing. He binds Jace to himself, tries to consume him, perhaps to somehow make Jace’s life his own. He will never get love anyway (he doesn’t UNDERSTAND IT, it’s like wanting something you don’t even know) so he’s content to have Clary & Jace with him, even if he has to keep them by force.

Now, none of this means I excuse what he does or did. I just like to think about what makes him tick & try to understand him. I love complex villains. My favorite villain is probably Hann/ibal Lec/ter (more in NBCs Hann/ibal than in the books/movies), who absolutely deserves to sit in prison for all eternity, but still is one of the most fascinating characters ever created, imo. His world view, his morals, his motivations to kill and his excuses for it need to be looked at outside any moral judgement if we want to understand human nature better, I think. You can love a character for their complexity and still judge their actions - and I think that is what most people in this fandom don’t accept. Liking Sebastian does not mean I cheer for his murders and ra/pe attempt.

AS FOR THE MORE THAN A GHOST AU, it’s one of my absolute favorites, atm, because it actually goes against my firm belief that death was the best option for Seb at the end of COHF. He’s not prepared to survive & nobody else is either. He is forced to face the consequences of his actions but suddenly lacks the conviction that they were necessary, good or even acceptable. For the first time he recognizes himself as the villain. Not as a monster- which is something wrong & unlovable - but as someONE who did horrible things & has to take responsibility for them. He is willing to do that, even if he feels like a different person & it’s actually Alec in that verse who kind of allows him to adopt that thought of Sebastian being a different person from Jonathan. That gives Jonathan hope, but at the same time it is his ultimate kryptonite. Whenever he is disappointed in his own inability to be ‘Not-Sebastian’, he regresses to telling himself he can never be anyone other than Seb. Jonathan is an idea without an anchor in reality & on his bad days Jon is convinced Alec is just telling himself & Jon a lie everyday to not feel guilty about loving his brother’s murderer.

I also headcanon that Jon doesn’t immediately become a nice person in the beginning of the verse. He ‘learned’ how to be ‘good’ so he could be able to impersonate Sebas/tian Verl/ac, but he never really internalized it. He is still impatient, more easily angered, looks to violent solutions faster than to peaceful ones. He is used to calculating damage against gain & will choose the most effective way, not matter the cost. Since he has feelings now that he didn’t have with the demon blood (presumably) and also a conscience he wouldn’t wage a war for the hell of it or to get what he wants, or sacrifice innocent people.. but he has yet to LEARN who the innocent people are. If there was a young werewolf struggling on their first full moon, threatening to hurt people, Jon would choose to kill them, whereas Clary & Co would try to help them. He still has to unlearn the rac/ism against Downworlders Valentine nurtured in him. He still has to learn how to take and deal with rejection in a way that doesn’t completely destroy him. There are just so many aspects to this scenario & that’s why I love it so much!!

I AM SO SORRY about how long this turned out, and you didn’t even ask for ANY OF THIS *hides, ashamed*

Thank you again for your message & your kind words. I currently also really love the hooker AU and the a/b/o AU, so I’ll hopefully get to continuing those soon c:I have a drabble planned for the hooker AU in which I’ll write about the first time Jace took money for se/x, if you’re interested in that.Unrelated, Andy & I also talked about a short drabble based on ‘The Other Side’ by Ruelle, so if you enjoy having your heart broken, you have that to look forward to.

Sorry, sorry, sorry.:*