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the-conversation-pod · 2 years

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Timestamps

The timestamps will now correspond with chapters on Spotify for easier navigation.

0:00 - Welcome 1:16 - Intro 8:40 - Best Acted Scene 18:40 - Best Cast 25:06 - Best Acting Pair 34:30 - Best Actor 47:05 - Best Ghost Ship 57:19 - Best OT3 1:04:40 - Best Friendship 1:14:10 - Best Side Ship 1:32:20 - Best Main Ship 1:51:28 - Wrap Up

The Conversation Transcripts!

Thanks to the continued efforts of @ginnymoonbeam and @wen-kexing-apologist as transcribers, and @lurkingshan as an editor and proofreader, we are able to bring you transcripts of the episodes.

Please send our volunteers your thanks!

NiNi: Hello. Hello. Your QL fandom uncle and Auntie are here with giant sunglasses, brown liquor in a flask, a folded $5.00 bill to slip into your hand when nobody's looking, lukewarm takes, occasional rides on the discourse, deep dives into artistry and industry, and most importantly.

Ben: Simping. Lots of simping. I'm Ben.

NiNi: I'm NiNi.

Ben: And this is The Conversation, about once a season we plan to swan in and shoot the shit on faves, flops, and trends that we've been noticing in the BL, GL, or QL industry. Between seasons, you can find us typing way too many words on Tumblr.

00:01:16 Intro

NiNi: Hello and welcome to the VIIB Awards, VIIB standing for Very Important Internet BL Awards for 2022. So Ben and I are here. We've sort of been through the ringer in terms of nominating things, had a couple of very polite arguments, and we are here now-

Ben: We were very nice to each other. Don't worry.

NiNi: We were very nice to each other. We always are. And we are here now to discuss the winners of the VIIB Awards. So, in this episode—which is part one—we will be looking at our awards for actors and ships; and our first acting award is Rising Star or Best Newbie.

Ben, take it away.

00:02:03 Best Newbie

Ben: I wanted to do this in this order because I think it's important for us to get the basic stuff out of the way. Who do we like, who are our faves this year? And so we started with the best newbie because these are people we're hoping to look forward to in the future.

So, we nominated in the pre show: Nunew Chawarin, Bible Wichipas, Peat Wasuthorn, and Barcode Tinnasit.

Let's talk about process. So,

NiNi: Okay. So…

Ben: Before I get too deep into it, tell me why you chose the three you voted for, I guess, go through that.

NiNi: Okay, so I voted for Nunew, Bible, and Barcode; and the reason that I did that is when I'm thinking of a rising star, I'm looking to the future. I'm looking at what they've done. But I'm also seeing their potential. So for me, those three, um, had the best potential that I saw all of 2022. New faces who really made me want to see more of them as actors. So that's why I ended up with these three. Who did you end up picking and why did you pick them?

Ben: I chose Barcode and Nunew, and it for me comes down to, of the newcomers, who gave performances that we’re probably going to refer back to, and who debuted with the most immediate impact on the industry that they entered? And so I voted for Barcode because he holds his own against a veteran actor in a complicated romantic role, and he has to sing and he will be directly compared to Jeff. And we weren't necessarily positively predisposed to him, because there were some consternation from those of us who've been around about Gameplay being recast and Barcode taking the role instead.

NiNi: Mmm.

Ben: And so with a lot going against him, I think Barcode did an incredible job in his very first role and had a lot of great support in that role.

For Nunew, he has to play high heat against an older actor and there are complications for that in Thailand. He also has to sing a lot in his new role with Cutie Pie and even beyond that, he ends up doing the soundtrack song for To Sir With Love-

NiNi: Oh.

Ben: And that song, last I checked, had over 40 million streams on YouTube.

NiNi: Oh wow. Oh Wow.

Ben: And that's more than everything he did from the Cutie Pie stuff combined, and I think almost double. And so, those two really stood out for me in terms of, what were they up against and then how well did they do with that on the table?

NiNi: Fair, fair. And I mean, I definitely take your point about Nunew and the music in particular. I actually wasn't so much a fan of the music he did on Cutie Pie, but actually today of all days, I watched the first episode of what I guess the fandom is calling 2 Cutie 2 Pie.

Ben: That's what I'm calling it.

NiNi: Or, Cutie Pie 2 You, and the song he sang, he sang kind of a trot song in the episode and I was really, um, I remember thinking, being sort of taken aback because I like the tone of his voice, I like the timbre of his voice, I like the way he was emoting the song. I really quite enjoyed it. And I'm not a huge fan of trot music. So, that sort of definitely stood out to me. And then, I mean, I don't do a lot of the behind the scenes stuff, but I have heard how much he is making an impact on the music side of things.

NiNi: And that's all well and good, but I really, really, actually in Cutie Pie, I really enjoyed his acting. I—we went back and forth between us, I think, when it came to Nunew versus Barcode, I was definitely in the tank for Barcode. But, I think in the end you convinced me so…our Best Newbie is…

Ben: Nunew Chawarin, and it's not a disservice to—

NiNi: [long cheer]

Ben: It's not like there's a disservice to Bible or Pete, who I think do an incredible job in two very difficult roles this year.

NiNi: Ohh yeah. For sure. Like it. What Bible did with Vegas? I—Vegas is a very, very difficult character. Somebody incredibly hard to like, and somehow he became everybody's blorbo.

Ben: He does, he does an incredible job and I think it's because Bible himself is an incredibly empathetic and really thoughtful actor, and he really understood what he needed to do with that particular character, with Vegas. And I also—we didn't talk about him much here, but I think Peat does an incredible job as well playing Sky in Love in the Air, a MAME show that people are going to have a lot of complex feelings about. Peat is a standout performer in a very difficult role.

NiNi: I am one of those people who finds MAME difficult and I did not watch all of Love in the Air, but I watched scenes from Love in the Air and I think I watched one full episode, and I do remember thinking that Peat was definitely standing out and I, I was actually pretty surprised at the quality of the acting in Love in the Air, but I shouldn't have been surprised, MAME does cast good actors but.

Ben: We have a lot to say about MAME’s casting down the road, don't you worry.

NiNi: Oh we will. We will. And Peat was really good, but I think on balance, if we look at the four nominees that we came up with, I think that I am with Ben. I think in terms of the Best Newbie of 2022, it has to go to NuNew. So Nunew Chawarin, you will—

Ben: Congratulations, sir!

NiNi: —probably never hear this, but congratulations!

Ben: We are fans of yours.

NiNi: You have won the 2022 VIIB Award for Best Newbie.

00:08:40 Best Acted Scene

NiNi: Okay. So next category… yes, I I don't know what we're gonna give them like some kind of a—

Ben: We should hand out plates, that should be our thing.

NiNi: We should, we should figure it out.

NiNi: So, our next award is for the Best Acted Scene of the year, and this one had a really long, long list. So, I don't think we're gonna get into every nominee that we nominated. I think we'll just go with our top three on this one.

Ben: I think that's probably best.

NiNi: So our top three, yeah, our top three best acted scenes of 2022 were as follows: From Not Me, Episode 11, Todd and Black fighting. Now, oh my God, this was ev- er- y- thing. Ev. Er. Y. Thing. I'm, it's no secret that I had my problems with Not Me. I also very much enjoyed it in a way that I don't think other people enjoyed it, which was a little bit as a parody of the people that you will meet in a leftist movement, which I quite enjoy in my read on it.

Ben: That is, that is the best read on it, I think.

NiNi: [laughs] It was so obvious and I was like, “Oh my God, I've been around these people.”

Ben: That's how I felt too.

NiNi: But, that fight, that fight between Todd and Black, it was, it was gripping. It was emotional. I felt everything that they felt for each other. I felt—

Ben: I feel like there were a lot of stakes in play when they were fighting each other. It wasn't just about who was going to win. It was also about what winning meant for either.

NiNi: And when—

Ben: And also the fact that they couldn't actually really permanently—

NiNi: They couldn't hurt each other, when it came down to it. Yeah, they couldn't hurt each other like…Todd chokes Black out. He drowns him, and then he's like, “what have I done?” And he immediately pulls him out of the pool.

It's like..ohh those two are in some kind of love. I don't know what kind of love it is whether it's brotherly love, whether it's something more erotic cause… I mean, I think we all agree that they fucked right? Like Todd and Black have fucked.

Ben: Right, as the resident Gun Attaphan simp first, I was absolutely enthralled with him getting to play with Sing Harit, who I have been following literally since he started in Love Sick. So, I'm very happy that the rest of the world is figuring out that Sing is incredibly talented.

NiNi: Ohh man, and right now we're watching him in The Warp Effect and ooo, we're gonna save that conversation.

Ben: We’ll talk about that next, talk about that later.

NiNi: Ohh. Next series. Next season we'll talk about that. But I'm…Sing Harit is a great one, and so this fight was, it was everything. It was epic. It was fantastic. So that's our first nominee that we agreed on.

So the next nominee that we agreed on was from Ghost Host, Ghost House, and that was Pluem and Kevin on the couch in Episode 4. Now, talk about chemistry. Talk about sexual tension. Talk about that feeling of…wanting to climb out of your skin and into somebody else's; it's all there in that scene. It's all there. And then, when the tension breaks and they finally start going at it, it's just, it's magic, it's absolute magic. I, I don't know how you felt about it, Ben—I mean, obviously you liked it. But I don't know if you want to tell me a little bit more about it.

Ben: It was really fantastic. I think one of the things that stood out to me—and I talked about this with you in one of our earlier conversations—is there was a lot of really great high heat and sexual chemistry performances this year where actors really leaned into their characters’ desire for each other. What I think Boy and Todd do that really stood out for me, was they captured the same thing that Billkin and PP had in I Told Sunset About You.

NiNi: Mmm.

Ben: During episode 3—

NiNi: In Episode 3, yes.

Ben: —where there was buildup, there was anticipation. It wasn't just that they were willing to do the bed scene, it's that…you could feel specifically how and that they wanted each other before things happen; and in particular Boy does a great job playing up Pluem’s attraction to Kevin's legs. And when that scene starts to unfold, a big part of it is Kevin is pushing up against some of the age social politics of Thai society where he is not really expected or supposed to be an aggressor in an encounter like that. He's not supposed to lead with his desire, and it's one of the common themes about their relationship, they even recontextualize that by choosing to use English pronouns when they're referring to each other to make themselves equal. So they use “I” and “you” as their pronouns, which is also really fascinating, and there was even a lead in with their scene about “Is this your first time?” and a real appreciation for the mechanics of gay sex that we rarely see in genres.

NiNi: And that's something that you and I talk about quite a bit, how unrealistic some of the sexual situations we see characters get into are just because of the mechanics of what they're supposedly doing.

Ben: Exactly. So, those two really, real standouts for the year in that regard. So that's why this scene made the list.

NiNi: They made me believe, I mean, just that, that little micro scene of Pluem’s eyes sliding towards Kevin's legs and then him realizing that he's staring and just turning his head away because he's just, he's becoming too enticed. It's just, it's… it's so real, so visceral, I loved it so much.

So after scenes like that, what is the one that tops them all and, of course, the only only scene that could have topped are those other two scenes. Khan and Thua, The Eclipse, Episode Seven, that “I'm pretending to sleep. You're pretending to sleep”, kiss in the tent. Oh my God, I— [chuckles]

Ben: [laughs] It’s-

NiNi: When I tell you, I lost it. I watched that scene—

Ben: That was a really fun weekend to be online.

NiNi: —over and over. I just completely lost it. It was so…[sighs] I don't even know if I have the words to describe what that scene made me feel.They're so tentative. They obviously care very deeply for each other. They obviously love one another and they're testing the waters over and over and over. But then this is—

Ben: It really stands out for me because of the way that it reflects the internalized homophobia of the show itself, that they're exploring along the way. Because I was a young boy who went camping sometimes. And so, I understood so much of the social politics going on there. Like, you have to pretend you're asleep because you have to give everyone an excuse. And you can't respond too much because it crosses a line of acknowledgement and so it requires Louis and Neo to be really, really comfortable with each other. Because that is a very difficult set of emotional reactions that they have to convey across space there. And—

NiNi: And they can't play them too big either. They have to be so micro.

Ben: No, and it's very hard I think for some of the Thai actors to play small. I think a lot of the film tradition that many of them maybe grew up on is pretty bombastic and…that's not a, that's not me chiding them. It's just not the film history that many of them come from. And so, scenes like that are really hard to do, even for experienced actors. And I can't overstate how impressive Neo and Louis were in that particular scene, and really capturing the totality of the delayed and unexpressed desire between their two characters.

NiNi: And they take you on a journey in the scene too. Because it starts off, it's really tentative, Khan sort of wakes up, he sees Thua there, he closes his eyes, he nudges his way towards him. Thua opens his eyes, he sees Khan there, he closes his eyes again, nudges his way towards him, the two of them gently pushing their way towards each other, and then the kiss is butterfly light. Because of course it has to be utterly deniable. It's butterfly light. They're both awake, both pretending to be asleep to give each other that out, and then after the kiss, when Khan turns away…and you just see his… you see his joy. It's bubbling up inside him. He can barely hold it inside at that point. And all this is happening in a tent surrounded by their friends who are asleep.

I-I can't find the words. I really can't find the words and that's why it is the best acting scene of the year for me. So Neo and Louis take a bow, you have won the 2022 VIIB Award for the Best Acted Scene. We will be sending you a plate.

Ben: It really was really special. I know they're probably never going to listen to this, but please know, you guys really did the damn thing this year.

NiNi: They did the damn thing. I mean, I don't even want to. I can't even. Where do I begin to talk about Neo? I feel like this is not the place, but at some point I'm gonna have to talk about Neo.

Ben: He's got a big year ahead of us so we're gonna be talking about him.

NiNi: Oh oh, we are. I'm so excited.

00:18:40 Best Cast

NiNi: Okay, so next we have the award for Best Cast.

Ben: Ohh, we selected ahead of time: KinnPorsche, The Eclipse, Not Me, Secret Crush on You, and Gameboys 2 for best casts.

NiNi: Okay. Uh huh.

Ben: NiNi, tell us about your, the three you ended up nominating.

NiNi: So, yes, so my picks, my picks were: KinnPorsche, Not Me, and Secret Crush on You. So when I'm looking at a cast, I am looking at the whole. All the main and supporting characters, how they interact, how they work together, how they gel for lack of a better word, and how real they all feel interacting as their characters. So for me it was a no brainer, there wasn't a single miscast in KinnPorsche, Not Me, or Secret Crush on You for me, everybody fit their character perfectly.

Gun playing White and Black. We could talk about that all day and then you've got Todd. You've got First as Yok. I mean, my God, First pulled out from somewhere the sluttiest energy I have ev-er seen on screen. He just sauntered around, slanging his dick everywhere. It was amazing [laughs] Nut yeah, but I mean he wasn't the only one—

Ben: First, is so…First really is so special. He's part of two different casts that made this particular selection.

NiNi: Not Me I mean, there were standout casting, but generally everybody they cast was perfect for the role. Everybody: Fluke Gawin, as I said, Gun Attaphan, Off—oof, we're gonna talk about Off as well at some point because he has grown leaps and bounds in the last year for me. I'm super impressed with him in a way that I've never been before.

Ben: I agree.

NiNi: Then you have Mon. It's an amazing cast.

And then the third cast that I chose was Secret Crush on You. Now, I love unreservedly, unironically love Secret Crush on You. I think it was perfect and amazing. And I mean, I guess we'll get to talk about that a little later as well, but one of the best things about it was the casting. And specifically, again, I always look at the entire cast, but I want to give a real specific shout out to Seng Wichai because, wow! How about you?

What about your three?

Ben: Yeah. So when I'm thinking about the best cast, the question for me is how well, like you, how well does the cast work together and how effectively do they convey the themes in the global narrative that the story wants to tell? And the question for me becomes, could another collection of people accomplish this? So I selected: KinnPorsche, Secret Crush on You, and Gameboys 2.

Ben: Because the overall talent for the three of those shows stood out to me and for the most part, I don't think it's a show where you look at one person you're like, ohh, they're they're the reason to watch this show. I think one of the things that stands out for me is how absolutely, enormously talented someone like Elijah Canlas is in Gameboys 2 and the fact that Kokoy de Santos, Adriana So, and the rest of the cast managed to hold their own with him in a lot of scenes because he's really, really good. And he's a really special actor because he seems to have what Octavia Spencer and Viola Davis have in that people seem to perform better when they're with him.

NiNi: Mhm. He raises the level.

Ben: And so, he's—that's a really, really special cast to me because Elijah doesn't end up overshadowing the rest of them, which could have happened. And Adriana is such a big personality, when she's playing Pearl, and she manages to not outshine other people when she's in scenes with them. And it's, it's really impressive to me how effectively that cast shared space with each other. Particularly in their large group scenes.

And like you, I was really impressed with the KinnPorsche cast because they're working with a lot less on that show because of all of the tumultuous development process, and I really like how effectively they performed this a second time; and it's why I really had to acknowledge what they did because this was their second attempt at this show. And there's any number of ways that that could have gone sideways and been really messed up. And it looks like they ended up being better for it, and…that's incredibly special, and particularly for a cast of mostly newcomers. I was incredibly impressed with them.

Ben: So NiNi, with that said, why don't you go ahead and let the people know who won our Best Cast plate.

NiNi: So…our Best Cast for 2022, the VIIB Award goes to KinnPorsche, because they've got a big cast, they're doing a lot, it's a big story and I still get the feel of every single character, nobody gets lost. Everybody is firing on all cylinders, they're raising each other up, when they're working in pairs, they're fantastic. When they're working in groups, they're fantastic. When they're working solo, they're fantastic. It just, for me, it was a no brainer KinnPorsch wins this one so—

Ben: It was a little bit more difficult for me because I felt very strongly about the Gameboys 2 cast, but…

NiNi: I know you did. I know

Ben: I have to concede to the, the totality of what the KinnPorsche cast did.

NiNi: Because as you said, all the issues with the reproduction, the sheer size of the cast, and the amount of bat-shittery in the story, it stood out to me and that's why they get a plate.

00:25:06 Best Acting Pair

Nini: We're moving now into some more fine grained stuff. So we're looking at Best Acting Pair.

Ben: So,we selected of the, we proposed quite a few people, but when it came time for us to nominate three, we selected: Ohm and Nanon, First and Gawin, Park Seo Ham and Park Jae Chan, Elijah Canlas and Kokoy de Santos, and then finally Boy and Todd.

Ben: When I'm choosing the best acting pair, I'm asking how effectively do they work together across a wide emotional gamut? Some actors are going to do really well in comedic scenes together, or in romantic scenes, or dramatic scenes; and the question for me when I'm thinking about the best pair is who consistently maintains a high level of believability, even as they're moving across the narrative and across a variety of scenes? Particularly because in most cases some of the stuff is shot out of order. How well do they seem to know what they need to do in that exact moment?

Ben: And so I chose Park Seo Ham and Park Jae Chan because, as two idols, there were a lot of other things going on in the background that affect how they will be perceived for being part of this and they fully commit to the dynamic that they have to play between their characters, and there's a really believable segue from enemies to colleagues, to maybe something different that doesn't feel forced in a way that it could have such a short runtime, and it's hard to overstate how surprising their performances, particularly after Light on Me, which I think is really good…but, I don't think the cast romantic chemistry really lands consistently in that.I think everyone's very friendly and they're really stand out interactions and performances and I'm a huge proponent of Light on Me.

But Park Seo Ham and Park Jae Chan, I think, did not need to do what they did to be successful, and there's a reason why a year later, people are still talking about Semantic Error.

For Elijah and Kokoy, I mean [chuckles]

NiNi: I mean, what else can you say?

Ben: I was, I was shouting at my TV “I want to believe!” when I see these two on screen together, and it's really easy for, I think Kokoy, to just play Gav as hyper-cheerful and bubbly. But there's a lot of layers that Gav, Gav is incredibly lonely and really struggling with a lot of grief and externalized homophobia in his own family and Kokoy captures the desperation of the way Gav tries to be good to the people around him, even as he's struggling in a way that plays off very sympathetically with Elijah's tendency towards Cairo's brattiness.

And I think it's really notable how well Elijah plays Cairo's heart, but also kind of his naivete, because Cairo's kind of sheltered and doesn't really know a whole lot; and there's a great deal of emotional narrative and thematic terrain that those two have to navigate together, and they never feel like they're out of step with each other at all.

And they did that first remotely, and then when they finally get together in Gameboys 2, it feels so different because they're together. But, you also feel like they really tapped into something special there. Like this is still really early in their careers. But man, what a way to start for some of them.

NiNi: I mean…[snickers]

Ben: And finally, I guess I'll talk about Boy and Todd, we talked about their, their scene earlier, and mostly comes down to that. But I really like the way that they played up their initial attraction to each other. That felt super believable in the first or second episode when they start interacting. And…there's an easiness to the way that they interacted, which made them feel like one of the most gay pair of boys we've had over the last year. It didn't feel very forced and it felt really unique. We already talked about the other things. I don't want to go on about that too long, but I can't overstate how believable of a pair they were.

NiNi: My first choice was Ohm and Nanon, because…when I tell you that Bad Buddy burned a hole in my brain and so much of that was about how much Ohm and Nanon brought to the story. Because the story is already very good, the way that they build up this family feud, the way that they build up this lifelong competition, the way that they build up, how it has damaged both Pat and Pran, and the way that it made them turn to each other, the way that Ohm and Nanon built that up, that you feel that sense of history between Pat and Pran and that sense of the stress that they've been under their entire lives. They're doing it individually, but then when they come together in a scene and they're interacting in a scene, you feel their tentativeness with each other, but also the fact that: “I'm not supposed to like you, but still, you're the closest thing I have to a best friend in this entire world because nobody knows me like you do.” There's so much of that in there, and it's really like the right thing is some of it. But it wouldn't have been believable if Ohm and Nanon did not bring what they brought to the table. So I, I definitely had Ohm and Nanon on my list.

The second acting pair that I had on my list were First and Gawin and that is Yok and Dan in Not Me. 95% of the strength of that scene where Yok draws Dan it's, it's visceral, it's powerful, it made me sit up and take notice. Just. The way at first, that Yok is very teasing with Dan telling him “If you don't take the pillow away, I'm gonna assume that you're here for something else, not just to be drawn.” And then Dan spilling out as Yok is drawing him, just unburdening himself. And where that led them to inside of the scene and feeling everything that they're feeling and that really pulled me toward them as a couple, pulled me toward them as a pair because that came from somewhere deep inside their interaction, not just within themselves, but within the way that they were interacting with each other as a pair. So that is why I picked them.

But, in the end I had to agree with Ben's best acting pair, hands down of 2022 had to be Elijah Canlas and Kokoy de Santos and Ben explains it far better than I can with regard to this, because my reaction to Gavin and Cai is so visceral. It's…they feel lived in. Elijah is Cai, Kokoy is Gav.

Usually there's a little bit of an uncanny valley. There's a little bit of a shield between you being aware that this is an actor you're watching playing a character, and you being really drawn into the character and losing that film over the whole thing. And Elijah and Kokoy did that to me, especially in Gameboys 2. The way that I haven't seen from anybody else. Not even some of the performances that I really enjoyed and I nominated for this, Elijah and Kokoy have something really special in terms of how they act together and that, that—

Ben: I've seen both of them in other roles and I've seen Elijah in I think about five distinct roles and I never feel like he's repeating in these roles, and I've seen Kokoy and Elijah in another project they did together and the vibe is very different there.

NiNi: There's something about—

Ben: No disrespect to Ohm and Nanon or First and Gawin, you both—you four— did an incredible job this year too. There are other people in this list we didn't mention.

NiNi: Some good names too.

Ben: If you had to pick one pair. It has to be these two.

NiNi: It's magic. When you put the two of them together in these characters and put them on the screen, they are magic.

Ben: Congratulations to Elijah Canlas and Koykoy de Santos. Here is your plate and I can't wait to see what you two do next year.

00:34:30 Best Actor

NiNi: Our final acting award—

Ben: Best actor!

NiNi: Yes, our final acting award for 2022 is the Best Actor of the Year, and again, we both nominated different groups of people, but we only agreed on one and—

Ben: This is a difficult one, and I think before we read off even the names, let's talk about what we're looking for in Best Actor. How about you go first? What are you looking for?

NiNi: Ohh my gosh. I am looking for somebody to take me into the character’s psyche. I'm looking for them to show me a truth about the character that maybe isn't exactly on the page, but they find within themselves as they act the character. I'm looking for nuances that come from deep, deep, deep understanding and delving into the character. I'm looking for excellence. I am looking for submerging of the ego. I'm looking for disappearing into the character.

My choices, my nominees were: Nanon Korapat as Pran in Bad Buddy, when I talk about disappearing into a character. My God. Nanon became Pran. Nanon was gone. Nanon disappeared. He was not there anymore. Nanon was not home. What was there was Pran and that scene where Pran breaks down after he has the fight with his mother? Just that whole episode, there's just one thing after the other. When Pat’s dad finds them and he pushes him and then he pushes Pat away to go and talk to his dad, and then he goes back home and has fight with his mom. And then he's on the rooftop when Pat comes to find—that whole sequence. It just…

Ben: You know they filmed both of the rooftop scenes the same night.

NiNi: I know, and the emotional difference, the emotional color between the two is just, how do you go from one of those things to the other of those things in the same night? It's just magic, absolute magic. So Nanon one was the first nominee that I had.

My second nominee was First Kanaphan as Akk in The Eclipse. What drew me into Akk was the fear that he had. It was palpable. I'm looking at the first episode or first two episodes of The Eclipse and I'm watching what I called Gestapo Akk, which is him really being the rule stickler, the heavy and I'm looking at this kid, and I'm looking at him reacting to Ayan coming into his orbit and just totally shattering his psyche without even trying. And I'm just like, “Oh my God, this poor baby, he does not know how the hell he's gonna survive this.” Because, we find out later that Akk has had crushes before, but that Akk is so deeply internalized, so deeply closeted, he can't even admit the way he feels to himself. And sort of—

Ben: I think First’s performance really stands out because Akk was so different—

NiNi: It really does. Akk is, Akk is a very different character from the characters I've seen First play before.

Ben: I think that's really what is special about First for me. He's played in about 11 different roles now? And…and we talk about actors growing between roles and that really just has to do with how much more believable they are. First keeps getting better, but what stands out for me is how specific all of First’s performances have been.

NiNi: And we talked about this with the Moonlight—when we talked about the Moonlight Chicken trailer—not to to delve off topic—but I mean all you or not the trailer, they're special. All you see is First walk across the lobby—

Ben: Right. We were both screaming.

NiNi: —and immediately get who his character is.

Ben: He's really, really good and we had a lot of things to talk about. We'll talk about First a lot in the coming year.

NiNi: We, we we'll, we'll—we will talk about him a lot cause he's in quite a bit.

Ben: My other two picks were: Elijah Canlas and Son Woo Hyun. I already talked about Elijah with Kokoy. But individually, Elijah's good enough that he could have carried the entirety of Gameboys on the strength of his performance alone. It's really…good that the rest of the cast was able to keep up with him. But, even if they couldn't, we would still be talking about Gameboys because of Elijah alone, and that's kind of what I look for when I'm talking about best actor. The question for me is how strong is their performance that you just can't envision anyone else doing this? So Elijah stands out for that for our Cairo.

Ben: And then Son Woo Hyun stands out for—

NiNi: Kang Seo Jun!

Ben: Here's the thing. Like there's a lot of people who did not enjoy To My Star 2: To Our Untold Stories. I loved it.

NiNi: I also loved it.

Ben: I'm, I'm a melancholy person. But here's the thing. Like to really delve into that deep level of melancholy takes an incredibly talented actor to keep the audience from losing hope along the way. And Son Woo Hyun plays his optimism in a way that feels really attainable, because you can tell that he's holding on for dear life because he knows he'll break if he lets go. And so it's really important that when his character does actually give up around Episode 7? It hurts so much because you can feel how hard he worked to not give up before that. And I just don't think that a sequel romance story that puts the characters through a lot of pain that I said was not done at the end of the first one. That's, that's my big disagreement with other takes. I just don't think anyone else carries that. I think the two of them are a really special pair as well, but I don't think that worked without Son Woo Hyun’s performance at all.

NiNi: I always talk about in To My Star—the original To My Star, how he is covering up his melancholy, his paranoia, all of these things with the sunshine attitude and how clear that is in the acting, even before you know anything about him and To My Star 2. He took that and ran with it. It was amazing.

Ben It's really interesting, like he and Kokoy de Santos are basically doing the same basic role in their stories. The real changeover is that we spend more time with Son Woo Hyun, and so we have to, we have to believe that a lot harder.

NiNi: We have to believe what it is about him that would carry him through a year without seeing the person who walked out on him on his birthday and left a note and know why he would still be looking for him a year later, you had to believe.

NiNi: And you absolutely believe that.

Ben: And when they get back together—

NiNi: Yeah, yeah.

Ben: —all of those scenes are really difficult. When he finally breaks and his frustration comes out it isn't…He could have played it as sad and mopey, there was…there was a specific form of outrage he tapped into there that really landed—

NiNi: There was an energy there

Ben: –-and you never forget that he's an actor playing an actor and he does an incredible job of it. It's not easy.

NiNi: But I mean—

Ben: The one nominee [chuckle] that we both agreed on.

NiNi: Yes.

Ben: Let's talk about him.

NiNi: So…

Ben: Seng Wichai

NiNi: And actually, I was supposed to say for both roles, so, Seng Wichai playing Toh in—or as I call him, Toh Gay to Function—

Ben: [wheeze]

NiNi: –-on Secret Crush on You and then playing Pan in War of Y, which is a show that we both gave up on. But, that first arc, New Ship with Seng Wichai playing Pan? Gripping. Riveting. He elevated that entire first arc of War of Y, and then what he did with Toh in Secret Crush on You, because Toh is a very hard character to like. When you meet Toh, he is: stalking Nuea, he is… deluded, he is in this fantasy realm that he refuses to jump out of, no matter how much his friends are gently trying to tell him “This is not okay. This is creepy. This is not good for you.” His friends are gently trying to get him out of it, and you don't know where this comes from. And then as the series goes on, you start to see where this obsessiveness, where this obsession with Nuea comes from. And it doesn't have anything to do with Nuea. It has to do with Toh and how Toh feels about himself.

And, as they go on and go on it, it starts to get even deeper where you realize that part of the problem as well is how for all that Toh is—-and for this, I will use the term that even though it's not quite correct, visibly queer because he's femme, Secret Crush on You is a story about femmes. Um…he's not out and it affects everything he does, everything he feels about himself and you see that in the way that Seng plays the character, I was gobsmacked. Best Actor of 2022. Hands down, and Ben and I agreed on this.

Ben: It stood out for me because the question—I said this with Elijah, that Gameboys 2 would have been good if everyone else wasn't. And… that's how I feel about Secret Crush on You. Seng is so compelling in Secret Crush on You and War Of Y: New Ship that you can't look away. And I feel like the special quality that Seng taps into is he can play ugly really well.

NiNi: His character in War Of Y is this sweaty, desperate mess. And somehow you just can't keep your eyes off of him.

Ben: Toh is also kind of a mess, and what's interesting is like Seng is actually an incredibly attractive person, but he—

NiNi: He is.

Ben: In both shows he, he plays his characters in a way that is kind of unattractive and it's really hard to do that really well. A lot of actors ride on the strength of their smiley charm alone, but Seng can't for both of the roles he's in, because he actually has to play his own charm as kind of twisted and weird with the way he has to smile as both characters. And that's one of the major things that stood out for me and why I put him above an incredibly difficult. there we didn't even mention who were on this list who in–-

NiNi: Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Ben: —any other year would have probably won, but 2022 was a really special year in genre.

NiNi: Seng took it for me and I think you and I talked about the last sex scene of Seng and Billy's arc in War of Y and how I had to look away, it was so…I, I was worried that there was something actually happening on that set…that was intense.

Ben: Oh man.

NiNi: Up against the mirror? That was really intense. Seng Wichai in that New Ship arc…add that to Toh—either one of those roles alone would have gotten them the best actor of the year together. Blows everybody else out of their water.

Ben: That was basically it. We were having a conversation. I was like “Seng carried two shows, everybody else carried one.”

NiNi: Yep, basically, so he wins. So congratulations to Seng Wichai for winning the 2022 VIIB Award for Best Actor, your plate is in the mail.

00:47:05 Best Ghost Ship

NiNi: We're moving into a new category. Now we're going to talk about ships.

Ben: This is going to be a little bit different because before we were mostly talking about the strength of performance and so we were talking about the skill of the people involved. At this point, we're going to be talking more about the collective character dynamics that are a result of the work.

NiNi: So this is a mix really of us looking at the writing for a couple, the acting for a couple, what the production design for the couple is telling us about how they work together, their chemistry. These are the kinds of things that I was looking at. I don't know if you had anything in addition to that.

Ben: This particular section is a little bit different from the last one because when it comes to really strong performances, there is strong enough that people pick up on it from small bits that manage to make gifs on Tumblr and such, and so NiNi and I have basically seen everything that we agreed upon in this. The ship awards are a little bit different because I've seen a whole lot more than NiNi, so there's going to be a lot of commentary about the side of BL that NiNi doesn't have time or attention for. So, this section is going to be a little bit different.

Ben: So we're starting with Best Ghost shipm for us a ghost ship is one that is not, say, officially sanctioned per se by the show, but is one that you're like, maybe though…maybe…

NiNi: “Hold on.”

Ben: “I got something to say about that.” So, we selected quite a few, but I ended up nominating Todd and Black for Not Me, for all the reasons we discussed earlier; Vegas and Porsche from KinnPorsche; and then Minato and Hanabusa from Minato’s Laundromat. We've already talked about how Todd and Black want to fuck each other so much that it makes them look stupid–-

NiNi: So much.

Ben: –-and you're gonna have a lot to say about Vegas and Porsche, and I'll let you cover that because you're way more into that one than I am but the thing that stands out for me about a ghost ship, I think. And what draws me to it is, how does the presence of that ghost ship impact the narrative overall, or influence how things unfold? So, the tension between Todd and Black is the source of all of the drama in Not Me. All of this stuff wouldn't happen if Black didn't turn radical and Todd didn't get pissed that he lost his friend along the way.

With Vegas and Porsche, the potential for Porsche to choose Vegas creates all sorts of problems with Kinn, and conflates the ongoing rivalry between the two halves of the family already. And there was a real belief I had at one point that Porsche could choose Vegas.

And then finally, Minato’s Laundromat is a show about a graduating high school senior who has been harboring a ten-year crush on the now owner of the local family run laundromat. The owner is Minato, and Hanabusa is one of the other local kids is also graduating at the same time, but he consistently flirts with Minato just to piss Shin off, and it's so convincing that I was allowing myself to become delusional about it, just because I thought it was fun to see how it complicated things. So, those were the three that I ended up selecting, primarily like I said, about how much their ghost ship impacts the, sort of, primary ships or the other themes of the ship.

NiNi: I, I agree what you said about the fact that the ToddBlack ghost ship is actually the impetus for the entire Not Me story, and that's the one of the reasons that I picked it as well. [High pitched] It should have happened

Ben: It happened, don't worry.

NiNi: I'm pretty sure it happened. I feel like a lot of the way I feel about ghost ships, is that “ohh, this is something that I really wish that they had put in there” because it would have put a nice little complicated wrinkle in the story, chemistry was there.

Todd and Black stood out for me, so that is definitely. Ohh God, they should have showed that to us. The second one I picked. I also picked VegasPorsche. I picked VegasPorsche because Porsche is Helen of Troy, right? I'm not the only person who got that out of—

Ben:That's a really great way to describe his role.

NiNi: Porsche is Helen of Troy. Porsche is somehow the face that launched 1000 ships, although he's not really. There's a little bit of pulling and tugging over Porsche himself, but also what Porsche represents, which is his mom, which is the pulling and tugging from the previous generation was it's over his mother. Over Namphueng.

I enjoy the dynamic of VegasPorsche as well because I also didn't know if Vegas was trying to play Porsche or if he was seriously interested because it's not quite clear. I liked that. I liked not being 100% certain of whether Vegas was really into Porsche, or whether he was just playing him and that came up for me and two scenes. It came up for me in the scene where after everything happens with Kinn and Porsche in Episode 4, that Vegas comes and meets Porsche at Yok’s Bar and takes him out for a ride on his motorcycle. And that whole—the ride on the motorcycle, the romantic music—I'm not above being swayed by music, just the general behavior, the interaction between Vegas and Porsche in that scene, and how flirty Porsche was. He was feeling alive and I feel like Vegas was also feeling that vibe too. I don't think it was fake in that moment.

And then in Episode 7, where it's a little clearer cut that maybe Vegas is trying to use Porsche, although again, I don't think it's 100% clear cut and he tries to kiss him in the bathroom. At that point you feel like Porsche is not interested in this anymore. He's not flirting. He's not. Whatever. But I get the sense that Vegas hasn't quite picked up. He still thinks that maybe he has a chance and again, it's a little bit more iffy as to whether he's seriously into Porsche, or whether he's just playing him. And again, that might just be my interpretation, but I always felt that Vegas had a little bit of a soft spot for Porsche. That's why they were also on my ghost ship nominees list. And then my third one was just—

Ben: I think it works really well for Vegas because of how deeply unwell he is.

NiNi: Oh yeah.

Ben: He probably does like Porsche, but he likes Porsche the only way he can. As a way to bother Kinn, because that's the only thing he's been allowed to care about.

NiNi: That goes back to Vegas as a character, man. We don't have a Best Character award, but if we did…

Ben: We chose not to do best character because–-

NiNi: The reason we don't have a best character award. Because it would just have been too hard. It would have been way too hard to just pick one. We had such an—

Ben: We didn’t want to get into a blorbo fight.

NiNi: We would have just had an embarrassment of riches. We would have had to basically give out 20 best character awards. So we just decided not to. My third pick for ghost ship—and this was just because it was so cute—there's not even a hint of it on screen, but I was just so attached to the idea.

Ben: That's why I, that's why I was waiting for you to talk about this. Because when you put this on the list and then put your mark by it, I was like—

NiNi: You were like whaaaat?

Ben: –-are they even on screen together ever?

NiNi: They're never on screen together, but I feel like it could have been a contender and that is Jay and Foei from Cutie Pie. Now I know in the end it turns out that Foei gets into kind of a het thing with Hia Yi’s secretary…but. But…Foei is such a ridiculous character and Jay is so not. I would have loved to see them interact in any way, but especially Jay meeting Foei and being like: “You are ridiculous. You have to come home with me.”

Ben: The first one you put on here that I was like, “I'm not with you sis. And I need you to explain this one to me.” I have been waiting like a week and a half to hear her explanation for this. Because I, I saw this on the list and I was like…”Whatever, I just need to hear her talk this one through.”

NiNi: But yeah, that's it for me. Like I said, there is no basis for it whatsoever in canon. It is a total go ship, a total crack ship. If I were a fan fiction girl, this would be the fan fiction I would write. I love a serious character and a ridiculous character together. I adore it so much. I would have loved to see these two, so that's why they were my third pick. In the end, the best ghost Ship is…

Ben: Todd and Black from Not Me. Congratulations to Sing Harit and Gun Attaphan for bringing together such a compelling dynamic.

NiNi: If you'll ever want to make a Not Me 2 and make that canon…

Ben: [chuckle]

NiNi: [in sing-songy voice] I will be watching. And not just for the sparks either, because the sparks were there, but just the dynamics are so juicy. These are people who have been friends their entire lives and had a serious fracture and they hate each other, but they love each other. I love it. I want to see so much more of that?

Ben: We don't often get dynamics that complicated in BLs. Hats off to the entire cast and crew for making that work.

NiNi: Nuchy. If you ever listen to this, please make Not Me 2.

00:57:19 Best OT3

NiNi: Moving into our—

Ben: Our next category—

NiNi: Yes.

Ben: —is best OT3. This is when I'm letting NiNi lead, cause I don't normally do OT3s, so I only brought forth options that I think were really supported by canon this year. We only ended up with three recommendations. So, before we get into who won, we'll just give you the three we had. It was the obviously the Jung Woo, Choco, and Milk trio from Choco Milk Shake—

NiNi: So delightful.

Ben: It was Pat, Pran, and Korn from Bad Buddy; and then it was Jung Hyung, Tae Young, and Jung Woo from Happy Ending Romance.

NiNi: Disclosure, I've only seen two of these. I have not seen Happy Ending Romance, so I can't speak to that, but at, Pran, and Korn in Bad Buddy comes solely and entirely off that scene in Episode 9 before Pat gets shot. I had to bring it up. Sorry, I just did where [laughs]

Ben: I always forget the Pat got shot [chuckles] until you bring it up. I'll just be existing in my world and be like, “Wow, Bad Buddy really is good.” And then you'll be like—

NiNi: [laughs]

Ben: *slides a paper across the desk*: Pat got shot.

NiNi: [laughs] So ridiculous.

The scene after the rugby match [chuckle] when Pat and Pran are having their little cute time and Pat is kind of like: “Well, maybe I'll just stay home and make out with you instead, or” and Korn comes banging on the door and he comes in to get Pat to go out for this victory celebration. And the way he was looking at them and the way that he was kind of like “did we all?” you know. And then the little hand motion he did? Just, he's so nosy. I'm convinced that he wants in on that action and I do not blame him. I mean between—

Ben: The reason why I also let it ride was you get the sense that Pran is very protective of his space. In the show, only two people actually enter his bedroom. It's Ohm and Korn, even Wai never enters his room. His friends hang out in his living room, but you get the sense that in the time from all their flirting in episode 7 and 8 that Korn stood out amongst all of the people they know as someone that Pran also started to really trust. He lets him into their space. He lets Korn see them inside of a space that might just be reserved for them. So.

NiNi: That whole idea of playing with what we're allowed to see and what we're not allowed to see in Bad Buddy, what's for our consumption and what's just for Pat and Pan, and the fact that you're right, Korn is the only person other than Pat that he allows into that very private space of his. It feels like something. And then after they were outed—I will never forgive Wai—Korn was the first person to kind of be like: “I'm on your side. Don't worry about it. Everybody's gonna come around.” And then he started immediately giving Pat shit. And I love, I love a best friend who gives you shit about everything. He give Pat immediate shit. Like, “Where's your… Where's your boyfriend? How is your boyfriend? You all did it yet?” He mentions it more than once. He is so interested in their sex life and what they are doing. I am convinced that he wants to be part of it and I…would like to see it.

So that's why I picked that for OT3. Do you want to talk Happy Ending Romance? Cause I haven't watched it. Or do you—

Ben: Yeah so—

NiNi: Want to just award?

Ben: Happy Ending Romance is a really Kdrama-esque BL from obviously Korea. So in this one you have a bunch of adults who are all connected around book publishing. Basically this up and coming hotshot, really talented writer ends up causing a kerfuffle in the industry by revealing some shady practices by one of the best selling authors of the era and he gets blacklisted but ends up being sheltered by another writer who becomes…he ends up living with him as a boyfriend and this other guy who was a publisher who worked for the publisher at the time left his position in protest and opened up his own publishing company and then randomly runs into this act—this other… writer, who he's—who's writing he's loved for so long, and he ends up working so hard to reunite with him. And the reason it put, it ends up on this particular list is the…through all the drama that gets resolved, the final shot is of the three of them on the roof together in a way that indicates that these two are a couple, but sometimes he still shows up and it's one of the few that really feels like canon was saying “it could happen.” Which is kind of similar to Choco Milk Shake, but they kinda end up creating separate pairs in that one so…I ended up being like, well, yes, but they pair Milk with Uncle so…

NiNi: To me, when you have anything that looks like a triangle, the answer is pretty much always poly, but [chuckles] I really enjoyed the Jung Woo, Choco, and Milk dynamic, especially at the beginning before Uncle enters the picture for Milk. This idea of them both loving Jung Woo so much and not just loving Jung Woo, but loving each other enough to make the journey together to Jung Woo, which is something I don't see talked about a lot in the Choco Milk Shake dynamic. They make their journey together.

Ben: It does give off an incredibly specific sibling dynamic

NiNi: Yes, and it's so they love Jung Woo, they love each other. It's the perfect OT3 for me, and that's why it was in the ends up the best OT3.

Ben: It feels like-It feels like they were watching, like, Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey, and they were like, you know…

NiNi: Oh my God. [laughs] You make me feel old sometimes, Ben. [laughs]

Ben: [laughs] I mean, it's not like I referenced like—we can't talk about that movie, too many animals.

NiNi: Oh my god [laughs] I hate you so much. [laughs] Yeah. No. So like for me, it was just the sense of the fact that they all love each other and that maybe, were it not for Uncle, it could have been an OT3. To me, that makes it the best OT3 of the year, so the 2022 VIIB Award for best OT3 goes to Jung Woo, Choco, and Milk Choco Milk Shake. So our next-

Ben: Sending plate to Strongberry because.

NiNi: Yes. Oh, my God. I think they would appreciate it actually. Like, I think if we actually reached out to Strongberry, but like here you want a Very Important Internet BL Award. Here's a plate. They would actually maybe make a video about it.

Ben: They probably would. They're so…they're so—

NiNi: So accessible.

Ben: –-really, they're so kind to people, I really.

NiNi: Yeah, yeah, this.

Ben: We're not talking about production houses specifically, but I really love the Strongberry has done for a very long time.

NiNi: I agree. They, they love the fans and it shows.

01:04:40 Best Friendship

NiNi: Our next ship is friendship. And this was so hard because there were so many great friendships and friend groups on screen this last year. I'll talk a little bit about my nominees, so I nominated: from KinnPorsche, Porsche and Yok; I nominated Khua and Diao from Cutie Pie; and I nominated Toh, Jao, Daisy, and Som from Secret Crush on You.

Now Porsche and Yok, you could call that a friendship, you can call that a mother-son relationship, you can call it whatever they want, but it's clear that those two are ride or die for each other like—

Ben: Like a true queer relationship, it is complicated.

NiNi: Yes, the bisexual and the house mother. It's beautiful to watch anytime Porsche needs advice, particularly about romance and about falling in love, he turns to Yok when he finally, is open with being with Kinn, the place that they go to is they go to Yok’s bar and when he wants to go to a place when he wants to take Tankhun to a place that he feels safe, he takes him to Yok’s bar and, just the dynamic between the two of them is so lovely, I…feel like they truly love each other. He trusted Yok with his baby brother to protect him. I love them. I love them so much.

NiNi: The second one I nominated was Khua and Diao from Cutie Pie, and that—that's because they felt so lived in and real and modern as a friendship for me. They just, they felt like two friends.

Ben: Modern is a very good term for them, I think.

NiNi: The scene where Khua and Diao are on the phone and Diao asks “Oh my God. Was it a Nail and Bail?” talking about. [Laughs] Talking about—

Ben: [laughs]

NiNi: Khua and Lian having sexy times. And I nearly died. It was so perfect. They felt like real friends. They talk about their lives. They talk about their loves. They make inappropriate jokes that they couldn't make with anybody else. It felt so real and lived in as a friendship. I loved it so much. It was it for me. Who are you two runners up?

Ben: I think before we, I talk about them, I'll talk about why I think friendship is really important in romance and why we made sure to include itas a category. The big thing about romance is it's about people's ability to form strong and meaningful connections with other people, and it's difficult to appreciate a character falling in love when they don't have people who care about them or that they care about. It's why I think so many villains are really compelling. Like Yzma and Kronk are a great example of this, they wouldn't work if they didn't have this weird twisted relationship with each other.

And with the two I nominated as runners up, it was Gav and Pearl from Gameboys first because…because they were best friends, then lovers, now back to best friends and Pearl is always there to help Gav, and she asks for really so little in return other than to just be acknowledged and hugged by the boys whenever she does something for them. It's not easy to dial your relationship back with someone and genuinely root for them to fall for someone else and Adriana does that in such a believable way.

Also nominated Nukhua and Khondiao for the same reasons you did. Their particular friendship feels like a gay friendship because you get the real sense that if they both weren't absolutely sprung for Lian or Yi something maybe could have developed between them, but instead they became basically sisters to each other. And I just really love seeing that in genre because we don't often get friendships that feel queer. Which I think is especially important for Cutie Pie, cause you and I were talking about this earlier. How hard Cutie Pie leans into sort of traditional aesthetics with the way they do stuff that the fact that the Khondiao and Nukhua friendship feels so queer, I think, helps keep that show from feeling, from skewing too hard one way or the other.

So our winner, who we will talk about at length probably, is the quartet from Secret Crush on You of Toh, Khaojao, Daisy, and Som.

NiNi: [sigh]

Ben: I'll let you go first.

NiNi: We nev-er get stories about femmes. Femmes are always the side characters or pushing everybody else into their romances and rooting for them. And not only do we get here a group of femmes and a woman or and two women, one cis woman, one trans woman, and I want to speak specifically about Daisy because I think that Daisy is a breakthrough character for Thai BL. I think that the way that Daisy is created as a character, the way that she interacts with her friends, the way that she interacts with Intouch when Intouch starts flirting with her, everything about her. And then that heartbreaking arc where she tries to butch up. To be seen as a man, when that's not who she is and her friends are there and try to be supportive, but they see how miserable it's making her. That whole arc solidified the entire friendship group for me. Not that it wasn't solid before, but how well they know Daisy and how they know where this desire to be seen as more manly in that moment is coming from. And the fact that they give it room to develop for her until it's clear that it's hurting her.

Ben: They do.

NiNi: And the minute it's clear.

Ben: They really live that live for—

NiNi: Yeah, exactly.

Ben: –-like two or three episodes. But I was really impressed how long they let that go and how visibly uncomfortable the friends were along the way. I was sold on the four of them I think from like episode one or two with their whole saying “3 = 4, so you're coming with us.”

NiNi: [laughs] That's nice. That was really good.

Ben: Like that feels like a gay friend group if I've ever seen one. You can't bail, Khaojao, you're coming with us. I just really love the way they care for each other. They're just so special. Like, yeah, there's a lot of great friend groups in BL, like, we're going to, there's always going to be like, Pharm, Manow, and Team. These four are very special. It's—

NiNi: They really are.

Ben: Part of why I ended up giving, I argued for Seng as best actor honestly is in the I think it's Episode 11 where they have that confrontation with Daisy, about what's going on. Seng who could otherwise dominate a scene dials back his performance so as not to distract. Like, that whole scene works so well, because it doesn't feel like it's just Daisy and Som talking to each other while Khaojao and Seng—Khaojao and Toh look sad off to the side. It felt like the four of them were together and the other two boys stepped back to let Som speak to Daisy as a woman.

NiNi: Yeah, woman to woman.

Ben: And made space for that.

NiNi: Just incredible. Just.

Ben: To those folks at Idle Factory, very, good job on that one.

NiNi: IdolFactory is killing the game when it comes to queering BL. And that sounds like—

Ben: Absolutely, absolutely.

NiNi: —that seems like a weird phrase to say, but, but they, they are.

Ben: Absolutely incredible from all, all four of them. Just—

NiNi: Yeah, it's just.

Ben: –-outstanding set of performances—

NiNi: There's no question

Ben: —for a long series, honestly. Really, really great job.

NiNi: And just like little things too, like them on the night out, them and the French maid outfits. These are people who genuinely—

Ben: Jao running to bring his own box of shit he's horaded from his interactions with Sky.

NiNi: Yes, [laughs] with Sky. They just…they love each other. They have fun together. They are there for each other through thick and thin. They give each other shit. They yell at each other when they need yelling at. They feel like real friends. That's amazing.

Ben: Let Saint know. We're sending a plate to IdolFactory

NiNi: We are sending a plate to IdolFactory without a doubt. So our Best Friendship of VIIB Award for 2022 goes out to Toh, Khaojao, Daisy, and Som from Secret Crush on You. Congratulations to them and to IdolFactory. Yaaaaaayyyy.

Saint, you're getting a plate, it's in the mail.

1:14:10 Battle Royal Best Side Ship

NiNi: Now, we come to the Battle Royale. The head to head. Where Ben and I are going to duke it out because we could not agree on anything in this category and that is best side ship, now…

Ben: We have zero agreement, our basic model for this was we threw up some nominations for people who we think did a good job in each category, and then we each marked the three that we thought did a great job and then where we both agreed we were like, “Okay, that's just going to be the winner to keep it simple,” where we had multiple agreement we had a small discussion that we would and then we went, all right we'll save the rest of this for the, the recording. We have zero agreement at all about best side ship.

NiNi: No. And as Ben said when we started, we thought about whether we should discuss it before or save it for on air. And we agreed to save it for on air. And one of the reasons was that Ben and I, I think, have two very different metrics for looking at side ships, two very different ways of viewing them. And that's why we each picked who we picked.

Ben, I'm going to allow you to go first. Who are your three nominees for best side ship?

Ben: I selected for best side ship: Sky and Khaojao from Secret Crush on You; Yok and Dan from Not Me; and Khan and Thua from The Eclipse.

NiNi: I selected Ink and Pa from Bad Buddy; Kim and Chay from KinnPorsche; and Syn and Nuer from Cutie Pie. I'm going to cede the floor, you have won the coin toss. Go ahead. Convince me.

Ben: I think I'll just talk first. I'll talk first about what I want out of a side ship. For me a, a side ship should not distract from the main ship, the main couple. They need to feel as if they are adding a level of nuance to the themes being described in the show itself, the sideshow from Golden Blood ended up outclassing what was going on with the main ship, which distracts, because that's not even like a bodyguard adjacent pairing of any sort.

I selected Khaojao, Khan and Thua, and Yok and Dan because of how they contribute to the primary themes being explored and the work they're in. As opposed to any other metrics that I think stand out. What were the…the primary criteria for you for your side ships?

NiNi: So, I think it's well established that I am not a fan of side couples in general. For me, a side couple has to be such that if they wrote the main story about the side couple, it would still work for me. So if they flipped main ship and side ship, I would still want to watch the story.

Ben: That’s really interesting.

NiNi: And that's my main criterion. That is my main criterion for side ships. If they are interesting enough to hold me even without the main ship, if they are driving story themselves, if they are deeply integrated into the story in such a way that you could really flip it and it wouldn't lose anything, that's what does it for me. So that's—

Ben: Yeah, I think that makes total sense and that's why we probably didn't. That's why we selected different things.

NiNi: Of the ones that I picked, for all that, they had barely any screen time, Kim and Chay goes to number one with a bullet for me because Kimlock Holmes and Porchay, will go to the top of the list for me, because whatever Kim has going on is obviously deeply integrated into the story. And one of the reasons that I am really convinced that we're getting a second series of KinnPorsche. Is that the story ended in the middle? As far as I'm concerned, because we don't know what's actually happening with Kim and with Kim and Porchay. So, the fact that the other stories seemed to be tied up with a little bow that didn't matter to me, it still felt unfinished because there is obviously something going on with Kim.

My favorite dynamic in a couple I've said is a junkyard dog and the only person allowed to pet them, so Kim and Chay is absolutely top of my list here. From the minute Chay walks into his life, he is fighting a losing battle. Eventually he just gives up and accepts that Chay utterly owns him. He will do literally anything. He will kill, he will maim, he will cover himself in blood to protect Chay, and Chay is the only thing that he cares about. He doesn't, I don't even think he even cares about his family as much as he cares about Chay. For me, that is the best side ship of 2022, of all the ones that I picked.

I also picked, as I said, InkPa from Bad Buddy. I think why is obvious. I think they're delightful. I think they're delectable. I think that the way that they fell in love is so real. My lesbian friends have demonstrated this to me time and time again, where it's kind of like “I like her, but do I like her like her?” and they spend all this time and I'm just sitting on the sidelines like, “girl you're in love. Why? Why are we still talking about this?” They're like, worried about this. Like, I don't know. Like, I think maybe she was into me, but it was so real for me. And I loved it. I loved that they could have flipped. Again, as much as I love Pat and Pran as much as I love the main story of Bad Buddy, if they had flipped it and given me Pat and Pran as a side couple and Ink and Pa as the main couple, I think I would have still watched. So that said a lot to me.

And then Syn and Nuer, I mean, come on, they're just adorable. Syn, this very religious, very innocent boy, suddenly just getting hot under the collar for this hottie who just walks into his class and he just doesn't know what to do with it. This kid is flirting with him. He's just like, ohh, I'd like—

Ben: At first, he's mostly protective of his friend because he knows Nukhua and Lian are it for each other.

NiNi: When the attention shifts and Nuer notices Syn, and then from that moment on, that's it from for him. Syn is so coy and sweet. And that's not usually the type of character that I'm into, but it works for this and Nuer is so naughty. The way that he talks to send, it's very respectful, but it's also very, very, very cheeky.

Ben: He, he toes the line in his piety.

NiNi: He wants to wreck that boy and Syn knows it as well. And he's just kind of like oh. “Well, I kind of want to be wrecked, but, then again, I'm also a bride of Buddha.” It's so delightful, I—

Ben: It's really fascinating listening.

NiNi: –-love their dynamic.

Ben: It's fascinating listening to your explanation for what you like out of side ships because I feel like it's not the way I appreciate them at all because I don't, I wouldn't want the series to be flipped like the, the star-crossed thing with Pat and Pran doesn't play out with Ink and Pa that way. I like Ink and Pa in that particular story because their gentle falling for each other underscores that homophobia is not the problem in this story. Because Pat’s parents don't have a problem with Ink at all. It's just that particular boy is the problem.

For Syn and Nuer, Cutie Pie is so much about this arranged marriage, you have a responsibility to this person dynamic that Syn and Nuer, as fun as they are, they just don't feel like they play into that particular set of circumstances or the age gap thing either because they're actually the same age. Which, I guess allows them as a point of comparison relative to the mains. And for Kim and Porchay, as much as I love Jeff and Barcode, they're in a completely different type of show from everyone else. They barely interact with the rest of the cast over the course of the show.

NiNi: Uh-huh, exactly. Yes.

Ben: Like Barcode—like Barcode’s character, Porchay is in like a, I got discovered by my idol romance.

NiNi: But think about it, if that was the story and then there's all this mafia shit happening in the background, wouldn’t that just be [giggles] delightful?

Ben: I mean, it would be Love in the Air.

NiNi: [laughs] Fair enough. It would be Love in the Air. Kind of love that. So anyway, that's me. What about you?

Ben: All right, so I first chose Sky and Khaojao because in a show about femmes, and fats, and other undesirables being chosen as loved ones. I like that Sky and Neua are so determined when it comes to Toh and Khaojao, and in particular I like their dynamic because it takes a lot for Jao to come around to it, because he keeps thinking that he might be being toyed with, or he's just going to get dumped and hurt. But once he does start to accept that he likes Sky, he becomes really possessive of him and starts mean-mugging other characters, particularly women in the series.

NiNi: [giggles] Surprise makes such excellent faces.

Ben: When they go on that run and that woman is clearly trying to strut for [chuckles] Sky and he goes “Shoo!” And so like what works really well for me with Sky and Khaojao, is that it helps reinforce how normal Nuea wants to be seen because he and Sky are best friends and they're both begging Toh and Khaojao to stop elevating them and putting them on this level. The, the desperation of: “We love you. We're not Gods or other special people because we play basketball where people think we're especially attractive. We just want to be seen as guys who really like you. We don't want you feeling like we're going to bail on you constantly.” Their relationship helps reinforce how normal Nuea wants his relationship with Toh to be. Because the same thing is kind of playing out twice, it helps reinforce that this shouldn't be spectacular.

Ben: With Yok and Dan in Not Me, you have a series about radicals fighting against the system, and one of your more radical members ends up falling for a cop in this, a cop who is maybe struggling with the, his own role in the system he creates protest art on the side, but he makes money selling NFT's…what, what a character.

NiNi: What a character. I mean, wow. But then again…Not Me is about the characters you meet in the leftist movement.

Ben: Exactly. And so like that really stands out for me when you're talking about the role of Yok and Dan in say this story. They instantly complicate the narrative that it isn't easy to do us and them when you're focusing on systemic change, because it isn't easy. There are people who are gonna end up serving as agents of the system because there just aren't a lot of great options otherwise. That's part of how the systems maintain themselves and what happens when radicals fall for these agents. What is the fallout of that? It would have been easy to just make them hate each other. But the fact that Yok becomes so insane for Dan really makes that work really well for me.

And then finally with Khan and Thua. Khan and Thua, I think are necessary to make the Ayan and Akk relationship function in the show. Because Ayan is a gay boy from outside of the system of Suppalo. And so we have him falling for Akk and the complications that happen when somebody who has seen the outside world wants to show you what it actually looks like. We have as a necessary point of comparison what gay boys inside of the system who care about each other look like with Khan and Thua. And, I don't think it's possible to appreciate Akk and Ayan without the tension and desperation over small acts that Khan and Thua are riding the whole time like Ayan is demanding so much more from Akk constantly. And here we see Khan and Thua, basically surviving literally on scraps the whole time and that, for me, makes them my best side couple of the year. Because they’re necessary to their particular story in a way that the others almost aren't.

Like, we could have done like we have…other options with Sky—with Secret Crush on You because there's Daisy and Intouch. They could have been blown up more. But, I think specifically for what The Eclipse wants to talk about with systemic homophobia, you need Khan and Thua in the conversation of Akk and Ayan. And then, the teacher's name, I can't remember right now, and Ayan’s uncle. Without them playing their roles in the story, I think it makes Ayan exceedingly exceptional. I think they provide context that's necessary for Ayan’s exceptionalism.

NiNi: I like how your thought process worked to Khan and Thua showing what it takes to be gay inside the system and still be able to try to at least be yourself and what it takes for that to happen. Because we see how hard it is for Khan and Thua to work their way towards each other. They are clearly people who care about each other. But Khan is going to slap away Thua’s hand if he tries to touch him. Coming to the end where he kisses him out in the open—

Ben: And that doesn't—

NiNi: –-on the beach.

Ben: –-happen without Ayan’s role in their story either.

NiNi: And it doesn't. It doesn't. That's true. I feel like you're, you're bringing me around on Khan and Thua. You're bringing me around. So, if I drop one of mine in order to also agree on Khan and Thua, I probably would drop…maybe Syn and Nuer, as much as I enjoy them. I feel like a story about Syn and Nuer doesn't say as much as the story about Khan and Thua, so I will. I will lean into one of yours. Any one of mine that you're, you're going to lean into.

Ben: I think in terms of accepting your argument about flipping the story and then being really interested in the side couple story as a result. I would agree to drop, because we basically see their story already and Not Me, there really isn't that much else to say. I'll say we can drop Yok and Dan in favor of Kim and Porchay.

NiNi: Okay, climbing closer together. So then our two points of agreement and where we're going to choose between our Kim and Porchay, versus Khan and Thua. And I think we've got pretty strong arguments for both of them. I will admit though that my KimPorchay love is partly because I need to see what happens to them next, where I feel like Khan and Thua’s story is pretty well wrapped up within the series. But also again that dynamic, I just love that dynamic that basically Kim will bite off anybody's hand that comes near him except for Chay. But that's just my personal thing. So I'm conceding.

Ben: I'm arguing that The Eclipse would be an absolutely insane show if we flipped it and focused entirely on the perspective of Thua [chuckle] watching all of this shit going down.

NiNi: I concede.

Ben: Yes. Yesss!

NiNi: So the winner of the best side ship 2022 VIIB award is Khan and Thua from The Eclipse. And Ben has convinced me and let me—

Ben: Congratulations to Neo and Louis!!

NiNi: –-tell you all. Congratulations to Neo and Louis. Congratulations to you, Ben, because it is very hard to convince me of anything and you convinced me about this. So congratulations to you. You will also get a plate. Congratulations to them. And now…

Ben: Whoof, oof, that was a hard, that was difficult. [laughs]

NiNi: That was a hard one. That was a real hard one. I'm glad we agreed to duke it out on the podcast, though, because that was a lot of fun.

Ben: I think it was a good choice. This would, like we would have done fine in text. But, I really enjoyed hearing you talk about what you enjoy inside ships because that was a lot of fun.

NiNi: With all the stuff that we have coming up and all the side ships that are happening and stuff that's airing now that we're going to be talking about in the spring. I think I'm gonna look at your way of looking at it a little bit more. So, you've changed my mind that that's not enough.

Ben: Thank you. I just watched too many shows, so the idea of flipping the show to watch it again, we're seeing that right now with Between Us and we both have thoughts about that.

NiNi: We'll save those for the spring show when Between Us is over and we can talk about it in full detail. Now, for the main event of the night.

01:32:20 Best Main Ship

NiNi: Best main ship. My three nominees for best main ship were PatPran from Bad Buddy. I don't think I need to explain this anymore, they were everything. They were the moment, they were life giving. They were devastating. They were hilarious. They were fantastic.

My second nominee is Toh and Nuea from Secret Crush on You because you don't expect their story when you start watching to go anywhere, like where it went and it was some really clever writing. It was some really beautiful acting. I really enjoyed it.

So those are my runners up, who are your runners up?

Ben: But this is a very difficult section for me because we said this in the pre show, but I engaged with 92 productions this year and NiNi engaged with maybe like 20?

NiNi: I don't even know if it was 20. I have to actually count, but I think it was more like 15.

Ben: Yeah, so 15, maybe 20. So I've seen a lot of dynamics and I put a lot on this list who, unfortunately I will not have enough time to talk about here. My two runners up are: Phayu and Rain from Love In The Air and then Pluem and Kevin from Ghost House, Ghost House.

So, Phayu and Rain there is some worrisome consent stuff with them, but I just don't choose to focus on it because I've accepted some of the rules of MAME’s world having been engaged with enough of her work at this point. And so the reason why I end up like Phayu and Rain so much is particularly for MAME. There is no drama in their relationship. All of the factors that complicate their dynamic are entirely external. They are an incredibly straightforward example of two people who saw each other from afar, decided they liked each other, and then started pursuing each other.

There are kink elements to them being like a lifestyle D/s couple, but there's nothing dark about Phayu. He can be a little stern, but he has a job that seems to be paying him well, he's loved and respected by his colleagues at his day job, he's admired and respected at the upscale auto shop he runs. There's nothing wrong with his parents. He gets along with his brother. He has a good relationship with his best friend. There's nothing dark about him that needs fixing. The, his relationship with Rain is just…he is a lifestyle dom looking for a sub. And he found his ideal one in Rain and worked his ass off to make that work. And it's the same for Rain. He's loved by his mom. He's beloved by his friends as the idiot of their group, and the only thing that really goes wrong with their particular dynamic is the mafia shit with the racing nonsense. Better than that, I really like them for that.

With Pluem and Kevin and Ghost House, Ghost House…I talked about this earlier, there's just something very specifically queer about the entire way their relationship unfolds. It feels grounded in a world that the rest of us could live in as well, and they do the rare thing in BL of showing a couple together after they've chosen each other, which is another reason why I like Phayu and Rain. I really liked the execution of them falling into the background to support once they transitioned to the Prapai and Sky segment of this show. That is incredibly well done. Pluem and Kevin get together properly around Episode 5 or 6, and then we get to see them doing boyfriend things for about two solid episodes before they do the required breakup nonsense and get back together because it's romance. You have to split the couple up so that we see that their lives suck now that they're separate. I get it. The genre demands it. It gets on my nerves.

Nini: [chuckles]

Ben: So those are my two runners up. I like, I like the specific queerness of how both of those couples felt, and I really liked how all of the issues that they struggled from are external to them and not necessarily in their control. And there's just something really special about the way those two pairs genuinely liked each other that really stood out for me this year. Not to mention for Phayu and Rain, both of those guys are newcomers. Boy and Todd aren't newcomers, but I was not expecting that from either of them.

NiNi: But in the end, despite all our runners up and all the other members of the long list, and this one was a long list, we instantly agreed on the winner which I don't think happened for anything else, did it?

Ben: Not in this week's worth of selections.

NiNi: No, no, no. So our winner for best main Ship VIIB Awards 2022 is Togawa and Nozue from Old Fashion Cupcake. This one was a surprise for me. The fact that I didn't even question it.

Ben: You don't normally like Japanese shows.

NiNi: It's not that I don't like Japanese shows, it's that I've been having a hard time with Japanese BL this year. What I have seen I have enjoyed, but I haven't been compelled to watch much of it. It hasn't been grabbing me. There are two shows in particular that you told me that I had to watch, one that we're gonna talk about in our special class program. This one was the other one, Old Fashion Cupcake and you're like “you, you've got to watch this. You've got to watch this.” So I did give a spin and.

Ben: No, it was short too. So that's why I got you to agree.

NiNi: Yeah. And I was completely hooked. Absolutely, completely. Ben likes stories, and so do I. Ben likes stories about older people finding love because we are both old. I'm older than Ben, but guess.

Ben: I am, I am the resident What Did You Eat Yesterday? stan anywhere we go.

NiNi: Yes, which is another one that you introduced me to actually. And again thank you for that. You're always introducing me to great Japanese BL and queer stories. So we are older than your average BL fan and as much as we enjoy all the coming of age and first love and all of those narratives and all of the young, hot things in college and the office narrative. There is something about watching an older man who is sort of having a little bit of a mid-life crisis be gently pulled into this relationship with a colleague who is still of a decent age. I think he's 30.

Ben: Thirty-one or two, I believe.

NiNi: So he's 10 years younger, but he's still not a kid. Watching that happen, it was fascinating to me. I felt like I understood them in a certain kind of way.

Ben: I think one of the special aspects about the way Japan handles romance. One of the factors underpinning what they seem to enjoy the most is devotion, particularly if it's been going on for a long time. So with Togawa, he became devoted to Nozue when he first joined the company and was kind of in a rut because he was overworking and Nozue we gently chided him and was just like: “Well, don't forget to enjoy your life along the way, it's just a job.” And Togawa took that completely to heart, and he has an incredible zest for life. It's reinforcing his characterization constantly, like when he's eating something, he shoves huge bites into his mouth. He doesn't eat in a polite way per say—

NiNi: Yes

Ben: —because he loves the taste of food. He works out a little bit to stay healthy, but he seems to enjoy activities that allow him to be physical and about. He continues to enjoy his life and when he sees Nozue forgetting that and kind of spiraling that's when he moves forward and makes his own regard for him present. And I just really like the choice of someone to share how much they love someone beyond just supporting them quietly because they feel the need to help them more. Maybe it's some of my current love of an airing show is, is bleeding over right now, but I really, really enjoy that. And then for Togawa in particular, he's got a genuine desire for Nozue. Like the final oner from Episode 4 of Old Fashioned Cupcake—

NiNi: Mmm, that one take scene?

Ben: —is so believable it works so well because Togawa seems to have gotten himself caught off-guard. Like, he's been restraining himself all this time and he finally confesses how he feels about Nozue and it comes rushing out of him in a way that he wasn't prepared for. Because you get the sense that he's been preparing for this moment and it just sort of happens and it's a mess and isn't just that Togawa is pulling himself out, Nozue responds in the moment, even though he's a bit overwhelmed by it. And there’s just something really special to me about the ten years of gentle support they gave each other, then turning into committed dedication that as much as I really loved a lot of BL this year. I was asked who was the best, the best ship of the year. It's these two.

NiNi: I would have mentioned in the pre show that I process my feelings through media because I'm not always sure of what I'm feeling, but if I see a character going through something, it triggers something in me. Something maybe that I have been noodling in the back of my head or some aspect of my life that I couldn't figure out and it clicks for me, when I see the character going through it. So one of the things for me, I was watching Old Fashioned Cupcake at a point in my life where I am going through a bit of a midlife crisis myself. [laughs] I've been sort of through the wringer the last few years in terms of what is the meaning of life? What am I doing here? What is my purpose? Why don't I enjoy things anymore? And watching Togawa take Nozue to these little cafes, and feed him these desserts, and tell him: “Let's have some mindless fun. Let's gossip. Let's talk about the things that teenage girls talk about. Let's be silly. Let's be immature a little bit. Let me remind you that life is fun.”

Ben: That didn't translate as well in the initial subs, but there were a lot of Japanese levels of interaction with the way that they were playing with gendered language—

NiNi: Mhm

Ben: —and familiarity of language and all their interactions, that is unfortunately difficult to translate into English because we don't have those many hierarchies right away. But I felt it.

NiNi: The way they would speak to each other at the office was completely different to the way that they would speak to each other on the dates that they were having. Which, Nozue didn't realize were dates-

Ben: Have to con your man into a date.

NiNi: —and then again it was a completely different way from the way that Togawa in particular spoke to Nozue when he had that moment and became overwhelmed and kissed him. There are levels of intimacy, there's levels of formality, there's all of these different things happening because they have such a complicated relationship in the sense that they are senior and junior at work. They have such a big age gap. They are,I hate these terms. I never like using them, but, the seme and uke thing, as well. There were so many levels to what was happening between the two of them in addition to all this stuff about Nozue’s midlife crisis, and his existential feeling of, well, “It's just a straight shot to the grave at this point. So why am I even? There's nothing to enjoy.” The dynamics of it are so fun.

And one of the things that I enjoy about BL, the way that it uses language. Because Asian languages, they have so many levels of pronoun and tone and everything for speaking to people who are at different levels of familiarity and different levels of age and different levels of all these things that those nuances that you don't get in Western languages. You can do it in a Western production, but it's much harder to get the same idea across with the economy of language that you can in an Asian production. So, I really, really enjoyed that about Old Fashioned Cupcake. I enjoyed Togawa and Nozue just vibing…having a great time. I enjoy when the feelings boiled over. I enjoyed how Nozue was into it, but then he was so scared because he had never even considered before in his life that he could be queer. And, it was just like whew, overwhelmed, completely overwhelmed.

And then at the end, when he goes to Togawa in the end and they're in the alley and they're, oh my God, that ending it's just [sigh] when he accepts the way that he feels and the way that Togawa feels about him, and they're in the alley and they're smiling and they're it's so lovely. It's so lovely. I feel about it very similarly to the way I feel about the ending of What Did You Eat Yesterday? when—

Ben: Kenji’s cutting Shiro’s hair?

NiNi: Kenji’s cutting Shiro’s hair, yes, and the way that they've been fighting, I think, over this cafe thing for like an episode or two at this point. And they went to the cafe in the end and I can't remember exactly what happened. I haven’t watched it in a few months, so I have to watch it again because—

Ben: Well, the, the cafe bit is interesting because it comes up very early in like episode one or two. Kenji suggests they go to it and Shiro doesn't want to be seen or perceived a certain way. And the final sort of movements of the original run of What Did You Eat Yesterday? feature Shiro allowing himself to enjoy these cutesy things because he knows they make Kenji happy.

NiNi: The end of Old Fashioned Cupcake puts me in mind of that, even though it's quite different because they're not doing these things to make each other happy. Togawa genuinely enjoys these things and he wants to share them with Nozue. So, it's not a question of one of them doing it for the other person, just to make them feel better, but it still has the same feeling. I don't really know why, but I think it's just that feeling of love and understanding and acceptance that they have for each other.

Ben: It is the rare show this—it is the rare show from this past year that I genuinely hope gets a continuation.

NiNi: I do. I want to see more of them.

Ben: I want to see what domesticity is like for them, and I gotta be honest. One of the things I really want to see from Japan at some point is intimacy from committed people. I think of all of the countries producing BL, they're the country that I most want to see tackle that. Like, Thailand came a little bit close to that this year with My Ride with Mork's uncles. It's something that I really want to see positively explored. These two were really great. We had a lot of people on this list for potential consideration again, I've seen a lot more stuff than any, but we were obviously going to agree on these two, but I didn't feel a strong sense of, oh, man need to argue for a bunch of the other people who ended up not even making the nomination cut.

Because as good as they are, Togawa and Nozue stand out in this year as a dynamic that: 1) I think really only Japan can do. And 2) as something that stands above the genre. Like, I joke sometimes that Japan languishes a bit. They realize they surrendered J-Pop to Korea and now K-Pop is dominant, and they've kind of laxed and they let Thailand have BL, but Thailand doesn't ever consistently hit Japanese quality levels. They didn't feel threatened by it. But with the current rise of Korea and the Philippines putting out some noteworthy products that people want in Japan, like that's part of the Gameboys distribution hell is the Japanese people apparently really like Gameboys. That's affecting its distribution. Korea is in the space and Thailand's putting out some great products, because I Told Sunset About You clearly was a moment that affected the whole world.

NiNi: Oh my gosh.

Ben: It's not that particular podcast. We'll talk about that at some point for sure. It feels like Japan is trying to do this thing where it's as a reminder we let you have this. L-E-T. And Togawa and Nozue feel like one of those examples. I think of also from Japan this year, there were a lot of…all of the stand out couples for me that I think really lingered with me this year, most of them came from Japan.

NiNi: For me this year I have been so Thai-heavy because I think in a certain way Thai BLs, even the challenging ones, are easier to watch than some of the other countries. They're easier to slide into, the emotions are so juked you feel them in a particular kind of way. Whereas particularly with Japanese BL, you almost have to work for it a little bit. So I don't think I felt like doing a lot of that work, which is why I watched very few Japanese productions in the past year. Mostly ended up watching what you recommended Ben, which would have been Old Fashioned Cupcake, Koisenu Futari, which we're going to talk about in another episode, and…what else did I watch from Japan this year? I think I watched more old stuff from Japan this year, so I watched Utsukushii Kare finally and I haven't been feeling to invest in that particular kind of way. I've been really Thailand focused. I haven't watched anything from Taiwan. I've watched only a few things from Korea, only a few things from Japan. But I—

Ben: It's a real disappointment that you skipped out on some of the, the offerings from Taiwan because, we'll probably talk about the Taiwan stuff more next week, cause we're going to be talking about some music stuff where that'll come up in the discussion

NiNi: Yeah, I think we're definitely going to talk about Taiwan in our next episode because I think we'll be doing sort of a country by country breakdown as part of our industry discussion. So, look out for that.

1:51:28 Wrap Up

NiNi: But in the meantime, let's wrap this up. We've got to close this one off, otherwise we will talk forever. You know we will.

Ben: Congratulations to all of our winners. And for those of you who weren't nominated or did not win, please know that it was not for lack of love for the work you did this year.

NiNi: Oh my, you should see some of—

Ben: 2022 was—

NiNi: —these long lists.

Ben: 2022 was an incredible year for the genre in a way that—

NiNi: It really was.

Ben: Like there were some misses this year, but the swings were so noteworthy that I don't really feel like there was a lot of phoning it in this year. Everybody really tried to bring their best efforts to whatever project they were involved in, and there was, there was something worthwhile to talk about in every show that I watched. Even the shows I dropped there was something really special happening in that show that was worth discussing.

NiNi: For me, of the 15 shows [laughs]

Ben: [laughs]

NiNi: —that I watched in 2022 from beginning to end, I think it might have been more than 15, but I didn't watch anything close to as many as you did. But, I got into the things that I knew were going to give me brainworms because, those, for me it's much easier go to something that I know is gonna haunt me in a particular kind of way, not in the way the Japanese cinema haunts me.

NiNi: This has been the first part of the very important Internet BL awards. The VIIB Awards for 2022. All the winners. Congratulations, your plates will be in the mail. Our next—

Ben: Those of you who joined us, thank you.

NiNi: Thank you very much for listening to our inaugural ramblings. Our next part, Part 2, which will be going up very soon after this one, is our technical awards and industry discussion. So we're going to talk all things behind the scenes: music, production, direction, all those kinds of things and we're going to talk a lot about—

Ben: Going to get nerdy.

NiNi: We're gonna get real nerdy, and then we're going to talk. Shoot the shit about what 2022 was like for us in terms of what we watch, what we didn't watch, what we're interested in, what are the themes that we saw happening. Both in the art and in the industry, so look out for that. That'll be following on really soon.

And just to give a little teaser, our part three of the VIIB Awards are going to be our best in class and our special class. Which, I think you will not want to miss. We have two special class awards to give out. I think you'll like what we chose. I think you will like what we have to say about them. We've held it, we haven't discussed these at all because we did not want to blow our wad, so to speak. So you'll be getting our takes fresh on our special class program. So look out for that. Anything else you want to say before we leave the people, Ben?

Ben: No, it's been a lot of fun and I'm just glad that we're finally doing this and I can't wait to get into the Part 2 stuff.

NiNi: Ben and I are nerds, so of course the nerdiest part of this is going to be our most fun part. We are out. See you next time. Bye!

Ben: Bye!

NiNi: Say bye to the people, Ben.

Ben: I did!

NiNi: Thank you.

#the conversation #ben and nini's conversations #podcast #on art #the viib awards #viib awards 2022 #winter series #winter 2022 #s1e1 #Spotify

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courtney-deserved-better · 2 years

Note

Hello, TD fanfic anon here! I just wanted some general competiton and ship fic advice

hi td fic anon i am so sorry it took me this long to respond 😭 but anyways here's my advice (under the cut bc it got long)

competition advice:

it really helps to plan out your elimination order before you jump into writing. you don't have to have every elimination planned but ones that are plot significant/necessary should have timing/a solid reason for elimination to make sense within the story. but don't be afraid to deviate from your plan or improvise! i was originally gonna eliminate courtney in the china chapter of slippery slopes and decided as i was writing it to finally deviate from the canon elimination order and boot duncan instead. and that totally changed the story for the better! i think the biggest thing to watch out for is having a character get eliminated with very flimsy reasoning. the reasons don't have to be dramatic, they can literally be "yeah everyone thought this one team member was annoying so bye", but as long as they're believable it helps strengthen the logic/structure of your story.

speaking of logic/structure, it's a good idea to have a concept of the tone you want to take when it comes to the competition. this is especially important for total drama fics, because there's a lot of frankly fucked up shit happening in canon that's played off for laughs or not fully delved into. and maybe you want the sharks and deadly challenges to be silly or brushed off while you explore the character dynamics/relationships as serious. or maybe you want the challenges to be scary and dark and threatening to the characters. or maybe everything, including the character relationships, is slapstick! the key is consistency. consistency doesn't mean there can't be tone shifts—maybe you start off the fic with the challenges being seen as goofy, but then as they keep going, the characters experience more and more danger and become traumatized by these challenges now seen as horrific. or maybe it's the opposite, the challenges start off as scary but over time the contestants get used to them and they fade into the background. the one thing that puts me off in fics is where the challenges are regarded as commonplace until one event needs to be emotionally heavy for the sake of plot and then that challenge is portrayed as Extremely Dangerous And Traumatizing when it hasn’t been any different than the rest of the challenges. not sure if that makes sense so i’ll just reiterate that consistency and confidence of tone is important.

when it comes to the content of the challenges: if you’re doing a rewrite and anyone who’s reading your fic has most likely seen the challenge and episode it’s based upon, err on the side of less detail. if you’re writing about the obstacle course from all stars, we don’t need an explanation on how every obstacle works if it’s not relevant to what your main character(s) is experiencing in the moment. on the flip side, if you’re making up a new challenge, be specific in how it works since it will be new to people and they will be imagining it without a reference point in canon. also, don’t be afraid to not explain things if it’s not super relevant to the main character. if a minor character beats your main character to the finish line, but your character was too focused on a conversation with another main character to care about competing, you don’t necessarily have to talk about the minor character running ahead of your character throughout the whole conversation/challenge. you can just write something like “when [main character] finally crossed the finish line, there was [minor character] panting and looking rather smug with themself” and leave it at that. if it’s not super relative to the main character’s pov, and isn’t necessarily a funny bit or enriching detail, you don’t have to write more than a single sentence about it, especially if it distracts from the main pov. it’s something that can get tricky with total drama’s ensemble cast, so you have to find the right balance for yourself.

ship advice:

when it comes to the (main) couples you’re writing about, it’s good to keep the arc you want their relationship to take throughout the fic in mind while writing, possibly tying it to specific plot points in your planning if you’re the type of person who likes to get meticulous (like myself lol). if you’re writing friends to lovers, explore their friendship and platonic dynamic before one character realizes they’re in love with the other, it gives the readers a sense of how these characters care for one another and work well together, and gives more stakes to the classic “if i tell them how i feel it’ll ruin our friendship” dilemma. if it’s enemies to lovers, explore why they dislike one another and how they push one another’s buttons and the transition from hating someone to having feelings for them. while the names for these tropes are simple, the content within the trope doesn’t have to be boiled down. using slippery slopes as an example again, alenoah in that fits into the “enemies/rivals to lovers” box. but what makes their dynamic compelling is how within their rivalry they had moments of friendship and attraction. heck, they were getting along really well in chapter 6 which made the inevitable blowup that deepens their rivalry that more impactful. so in a nutshell: have a clear idea of the arc but don’t be afraid to delve into or subvert/complicate the dynamic. the line from point a to point b doesn’t have to be a straight line.

i already talked about consistency when it comes to challenges but it’s important when it comes to ships too. if character a is mad at character b in chapter 3, but is suddenly fine with them with zero explanation in chapter 4, that’s jarring for the readers and diminishes the emotional impact of whatever happened to make character a mad in chapter 3. therefore diminishing emotional impact in future chapters if the readers know [important thing] that happened in chapter 8 could totally be glossed over when they get to chapter 9. don’t be afraid to take your time with the characters’ emotions and feelings toward one another, it doesn’t really read as natural for someone’s opinions toward another person to turn on a dime without something significant happening to cause that.

lastly, think about why these two characters work as a couple (or don’t work, if that’s the direction you want to take). what does character a admire about character b and vice versa? in what ways are they similar and in what ways are they different and how do those affect their relationship? what makes them a good couple? why are they attracted to one another? it’s harder to get invested in a fic that goes “character a and character b like each other” without elaborating on that than a fic that goes “character a likes character b because b brings stability and a soothing presence to a’s anxiety-inducing chaotic life and character b likes character a because a’s impulsivity pushes them out of their comfort zone and challenges them to be their best self when b is finding themself bored with their own life’s stasis”. this is obviously A Lot to work with if you’re writing a fluffy oneshot or something but if you’re working on a roughly season-long multichapter fic it’s good to really dive into what makes your main couple(s) click & tick.

not really related to ship or competition but: do NOT be afraid to write extremely niche stuff that you think only you have an interest in. it’s probably not gonna get written if you don’t write it, and if you do write it and put it out there, you might find other people who like that same niche stuff or didn’t like it before but like it after reading your fic. write what you wanna see!! don’t worry about who might read it, write for yourself. if you’re putting all the effort/work in to create a fic you deserve to be that fic’s number 1 fan.

i hope this was helpful, please keep in mind that i’m not trying to be a definitive authority on how to write well, i’m just “verbalizing” what helps me write fics i can be proud of and enjoy. again, im so sorry it took this long to respond! if you have any more questions feel free to send them in and i promise it won’t take me another month and half to get to them lol

#ask #anon

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swampstew · 2 years

Text

Kid's Pirate King Ambition

*disclaimer that it relates to my fic*

Ahem -

So when I started my fic "Turn Back Time" my concept for the West Peninsula was a smaller scale version of modern America. Ruled by a government body that coded the laws that just so happen to squeeze and exploit the working class for everything they have, but also cushion themselves and other elite types. This inspires a revolutionary type mindset for the main characters, even before they met the pirates; and when I wrote them relating these things to the pirates, I wrote the pirates as having had vague familiarity with those types of issues but never elaborated beyond hahah set fire to things! Chaos! ANARCHY!

Providing excerpts below but also highly encouraging you to read my fic cause I think its fun and cute and hope you think so too. Shilling over.

Read below to be razzle dazzled by my prophetic mind of Eustass Kid's ambition to be King of the Pirates.

These happen during different scenes in different chapters so I'll only copy/paste the important lines. Further clarifying to warn; if you click the links you may be directed to a chapter that contains smut or other TW content so read the summary/header if there is one!

Chapter 7: context - a community relief event is happening the next day that the island "rebels" want to use as cover to get "revenge" on the corrupt island officials -

Tommy walked towards the pirates, “yeah and um, at around 8 we’re having a meeting. We’re planning to target the island official buildings and their personal estates during the purge. Nothing too crazy but we could use a strategist’s mind or two for deviancy.”

“Ohh I don’t know Tommy. They might call our plans too pussyfooted and try to convince us to burn it all to the ground,” Andrea smirked, squeezing Kid’s shoulder.

“Aye, destroying the established order is the only way to invoke real change,” his face twisted in a devilish smirk.

Chapter 9: context - hijacking the "rebels" plans to make the sting of their "revenge" more real to people who think they're untouchable.

Kid strode to the middle of the room and commanded attention. “OI!” he glared at everyone. “Your plan is fucking stupid. Instead of targeting the institutions that control you, take it to their personal homes and lives. Your dumb as shit bylaws state that anything is fair game during this purge and any damage or injury caused during it is automatically forgiven. So take the fight to those fuckers houses.” He dropped the paintball guns into a pile on the floor.

Looking down at her baggy, padded pants and oversized sweater, she shrugged. “You ever been shot with a paintball pellet? Fucking hurts.”

Barking with laughter, “I’ve been shot with real bullets, ya wuss.”

Chapter 12: context - a party on the ship where Kid celebrates his bounty raise and his crew.

“What started out as humble beginnings from the South Blue rabidly turned into a ship full of rad monsters quickly rising through the ranks of the pirate world. As it stands, we are the most prominent pirates, the lead in the Worst Generation rankings, and it’s about fucking time we’ve been recognized as such. The government is so quick to condemn a mere crucifixion of rival pirates but willingly turns a blind eye to the atrocities committed by World Nobles, royal kingdoms, even the Seven Warlords of the Sea – keeping pirates on the fucking payroll!” Kid spat on the ground.

“No real pirates ally themselves with marines or the government. We will never submit to them or anyone else!” he roared, his crew cheering him on with only a few concerned glances from the island folks intermittently in the crowd.

Raising his glass, everyone on deck mirrored his actions. “We are the future of piracy and we will dismantle the order of the world so it’s no longer ruled by scum!”

The response was thunderous. Andrea was impressed with his charismatic speech, the way he commanded everyone’s attention and even had civilians praising and cheering his speech. The islanders were not all naïve, they understood the way the island officials used the laws they wrote and capitalism to keep themselves above the rest; the division of class by wage and power had fractured the community long ago. She had only ever dreamed someone like Kid lived on her island to lead the people to revolt. She’d be happy with Kid himself leading it but he didn’t seem like the type to settle down. Wishful thinking. The Captain turned his head back to glance at her, Andrea raised her glass and took a long sip, raising the tequila bottle teasingly.

------- ok now the King of the Pirates ambition hook------

Kid understands Andrea's desires to not live in a confined world. He understands her frustrations with the system of exploitation on her island but doesn't have the means to do anything about it. He relates to her and likes her so much more for it. She's exactly the type of person he wants on his crew, and the fact that they have a thing only makes it better in his opinion. So now we have a full ship of pirate anarchists trying to achieve Kid's dream.

To be King of the Pirates and change shit up. The world is ruled by scum so he's gonna wipe it out and put himself on top. Will he be worse? Who knows.

Kid grew up in rough ass streets and he knows how corrupt people can be and what corrupt power looks like. He ain't about to be anyone's bitch boy. Not anymore. That's why he's so brutal. He wants people to fear and respect him. He wants to be King of the Pirates because he wants people to know that a fucking prick runt from the South Blue made it this high in life. And with the power and wealth of finding the One Piece, he will be coming for the Navy, The World Government and the Celestial Dragons. Anyone getting in his way is dead meat. He's not doing it because it necessarily liberates everyone else - he's doing it because they tried to fuck with him and he is saying FUCK YOU right in their faces. By smashing their faces in with his fists.

I'm not entirely sure he really cares all that much about the history of the world beyond professional curiosity. He's not trying to be a hero liberator. He's just a monster they created who is getting revenge. Revenge being fueled by the World Government/Navy allowing a corrupt criminal gang take over and ruin his island/and also may have facilitated the murder of his parents, to kill his first love, to try and kill him. Fueled by anger at the hypocrisy of the World Nobles and of Justice by the Navy since they do much worse, he's just upfront about his actions instead of hiding behind the scenes. He's a tough nut to crack because he keeps everything close to the (huge breasteses) heart. Everyone he has ever loved or cared about is dead outside of his crew. He doesn't want to love or care for anyone else because he might even feel like his love gets these people killed. So his only drive now is to make it out on top - then when the dust settles, he'll enjoy the fruits of his labor.

Anyways that's all I had, unless more comes up and then I'll respond to this post. This was all fueled by my outlining some future chapters and it made me wonder how my main OC characters would react if they learned about their past in passing from an original crewmember that isn't the big 4. A big smooch for you if you made it this far.

#op spoilers #one piece sbs #sbs spoiler #swampstew stories #swampstew #raven's rantings #raven's oc lore drop #turn back time #eustass kid #kid pirates #eustass kid x oc #killer x oc #tinfoil hat theory #eustasscaptainkid

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sheyshocked · 2 years

Text

Baby It’s All Just Chemistry (1/?)

Chapter title: Welcome to the Team

Summary: Months after the RED team assembled and its members started getting used to one another, they receive some shocking news. They are about to get a new teammate soon. While waiting for the rookie to arrive, Scout meets a strange woman outside of the base. Turns out she’s called the Chemist and is the new member of the crew.

While playing a matchmaker for the other members of the team, Chemist finds out that Team Fortress holds many secrets. And she might become one of them if she’s not careful enough.

Fandom: Team Fortress 2

Ship: Scout/Original Female Character (main), Heavy/Medic (minor), RED!Demo/BLU Soldier (minor) - all in later chapters

Warnings: Scout’s unrequited crush on Miss Pauling, Canon-typical violence

Tags: Slice of Life, Humor, Fluff, Canon-Typical Violence, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Tenth Class (Team Fortress 2), Slow Burn, Lesbian Miss Pauling (Team Fortress 2), Unrequited Love (Scout has a crush on Miss Pauling at the beginning), Explicit Language, Scout Doesn't Know Spy Is Scout's Parent (Team Fortress 2), Minor Heavy/Medic (Team Fortress 2), Minor RED Demo/BLU Soldier (Team Fortress 2), Male Pyro (Team Fortress 2) - Freeform, Communism Mentioned

A/N: I thought it would be fun to see a Czechoslovakian character in Team Fortress 2, and I was right. I had an absolute blast writing this.

You can also read it on ao3!

The last few weeks have been good for the RED team. Great, even. They lost only a couple of times. So few in fact Scout could count each loss on fingers of one hand. Life was good for once.

Then they received the news.

It was after yet another successful battle when they gave those BLU chucklenuts what-for and stole their briefcase (all thanks to Scout and his tactical genius of course), that they received a call from Miss Pauling. Scout has been looking forward to this all day. Perhaps she was gonna praise him in front of the entire team! She would say: “Oooh, Scout, how you bashed that BLU Medic’s head in was so sexy. I’m so, so impressed!” Then he would ask her out on a date – no bucket of chicken this time, something classy! – and it would be perfect.

“Good job, team!” Just hearing her voice on the line made him feel all fuzzy inside. He took a deep breath, rehearsing pick-up lines in his head again. All right. Today was the day.

Except it wasn’t.

“Administrator is the most pleased with your performance. Keep up the good work! Oh, and just so you know, you are getting a new team member this weekend, so be sure to give them a nice welcome once they arrive! Pyro – no fireworks this time, all right?”

The man in question mumbled sadly with shoulders slumped like a wet cat, obviously distraught about not being able to enjoy his favorite pastime with Demo and Engie, while a series of whispers erupted from the back side of the lounging room where the rest of the team was enjoying a cup of coffee or a fresh cigarette. Scout had a hard time processing what he just heard. A newbie? But who was it? Did the Administrator think they couldn’t pull their own weight, so they needed aid? Because they did not!

Miss Pauling offered no explanations. Instead, there was a loud gunshot to be heard and she hissed: “Oh, got to go! Please, try to be civil on the weekend. It’s really important. Bye!”

And with that bombshell, she just hung up on them. Scout didn’t even get the opportunity to ask her if she had plans for the weekend. But then again, there was suddenly a lot more pressing issue at hand.

Demo was the first to find his voice after the call. “Did I hear that right? We are getting a new teammate?!”

“Apparently,” Spy replied with a calm and steady voice. The only thing that betrayed his emotions was the haste with which he lit himself another cigarette. Immediately, Scout coughed and waved the smoke away from himself with his hand. Ugh, this had to be his what? Fifth or sixth just this afternoon? How could he even stand smoking so much? Damn addict. “Something’s not right. It took us months to learn ‘ow to cooperate to get where we are now. A new wild card could jeopardize it. So why now? Why not when they were first assembling the team?”

Sniper shrugged. “Don’t know, don’t care, mate. As long as we get paid, it’s not our problem why this bloke is months late.”

“I didn’t expect anything else from you, bushman…”

“Woah, guys, easy now,” Engineer quickly surged in to stop the fight that was about to start. A shame, really. Seeing those two brawl would at least ease Scout’s mind off of things. “I think it’ll be nice having a new face around. Don’t take me wrong, but seeing only you during the week gets old pretty soon.” Pyro, who clung to Engie’s side, mumbled something. It sounded like a whine, and Engineer quickly reassured him: “Not you, firebug. I could never get tired of you.”

Pleased with his answer, Pyro settled down once again. Which was good – Scout knew exactly what happens when their fire-loving maniac gets antsy.

“As long as it’s not some damn hippie. Or worse, a communist,” Soldier barked right next to Scout’s ear, nearly making him go deaf. He used to look at Heavy while mentioning commies. He no longer did.

“Mate, I doubt they would let one of them Reds join in.”

Pyro mumbled something unintelligible, to which Engie replied: “Yes, Pyro, we’re all REDs here. It’s… a different kind of red they are talking about.”

After that, Engineer dusted off his shirt and looked at the rest of them. “Well, off to work, y’all! We should probably clear out that room we’ve been using as a storage closet. You know, the one next to Scout’s. Heavy, help a brother out?”

The giant of a man nodded gruffly, already getting up from his seat while finishing the last bites of his sandwich. “Da. Little man’s gonna need a place to rest his head once he arrives.”

“Great! How about you, Scout? Will you help us?”

Scout huffed with arms crossed over his chest. Of course he’ll give them a helping hand – they are gonna need someone to give them directions after all – but not before having the last say. “Hope they don’t snore or something. If they do, they are gonna have to share with the big guy and his gun over there.”

“Oh, please. Give them a month of ‘aving to share a wall with you and they are gonna plead to be relocated to Monsieur ‘eavy’s quarters anyway.”

“Go to hell, Spy.”

Their bickering was interrupted by Medic clapping his hands with a maniacal grin from ear to ear on his lips. Scout never liked that smile. The last time he flashed his teeth around like that, he got a living bird stuck in his chest cavity for weeks. And the worst thing about it was the constant cooing. Nearly drew him mad.

“You go do that and I’ll prepare the operating theatre for another heart surgery, ja? A fresh new body to experiment on, how exciting!”

Ew, gross! Before Scout could tell him that the “fresh new body” is gonna be their new teammate, Heavy stopped right in front of him, almost causing him to fall on his backside. His annoyed: “Oof, hey, watch out!” got promptly ignored. Instead, Heavy turned to face the Medic.

“Doktor, will you also need some help?”

For a split second, his creepy smile softened into something almost tender. Well, as tender as their healer could get. “Nein, nein, don’t worry about it. I just need to do some extra dusting, that’s all. Go, have fun with the others.”

Heavy nodded. It would be weird to see one without the other, the two of them became nearly inseparable during the first month of their employment. So much so it was almost weird. But who was Scout to judge? And he didn’t have a death wish either to mock them, so he just let them do whatever they were up to.

As long as it had nothing to do with him and some new unethical surgery, they could knock themselves out.

Before they knew it, the weekend came in with a stride. By then, they tidied everything up (the only one who didn’t participate was Spy, of course – he disappeared for the day, probably locking himself up in his smoking room, letting them do all the heavy lifting, that bastard), put new sheets on the never used bed in the room next to Scout’s and were waiting for the new guy to show up.

It was Sunday now and no one still turned up.

The expectation was killing him, so to clear his head up, Scout went for an extra long morning run through the streets of Teufort before the others could wake up. But as he was about to return, he spotted a girl hanging out by the secret entrance of their base. White lab coat, a backpack so huge he thought she might tip over and fall, plus a crate by her legs, eyes squinting at a map in her hands.

Hm. He hasn’t seen her around before, maybe she was new? From what he could tell, she was nothing to write home about, not like Miss Pauling was, but it wasn’t like he was looking for anything deeper than a quick tumble in the bush. His heart was occupied elsewhere, after all.

With a confident stride, he made his way toward her. “Yo, lady! Need a strong tour guide to show you around? I know the best places!”

Up close, he could see that she was tiny. Like, real tiny. At least a head shorter than him. Also young, but probably not younger than he was. And yeah, she was kinda cute. Had a wild tuft of long brown wavy hair that had a ginger gleam to it when hit by the sun. Nothing stellar, but he could work with that.

She gave him a highly unimpressed glance, eyeing him from head to toe before turning back towards her map. “No, thank you. I think I’ll pass.”

Great, now where to… wait, what? He was left staring at her, dumbfounded. Sure, he got rejected more often than not, but he wasn’t expecting it now. He rubbed at the back of his neck, trying to regain his footing.

“Um, you sure? You look lost. I could at least give you directions or something?”

She sighed and folded the map she had been studying, then spared him another glance. Her big dark eyes made him feel like she was looking right into his soul. Creepy.

“Well, I suppose I could use some help,” she spoke with a thick accent. He couldn’t quite place it, but it sounded like a weird mix of Heavy’s and Medic’s. “I’m looking for Reliable Excavation and Demolition company. It should be around here somewhere, but I haven’t found it yet.”

That caught him off guard.

“Wait, wait, wait – why are you looking for RED?” he gaped at her. She didn’t look like a BLU Spy – if this wasn’t some sick joke of his. The only option that remained was… “No way. So YOU are the new mercenary?”

She blinked once, twice, confused more than anything, then gave him a stiff nod. “Yes, that’s me. I take it you know the place?”

“If I know it? Lady, I’ve been employed there for months now!” He outstretched his hand toward her, and she gingerly took it, shaking it before letting go. It wasn’t until now that he noticed her red gloves. Oh. All right. “The name’s Scout, by the way, and I’m a very big deal. Without me, the team would fall apart! I’m the one who tells everyone how to do their job. But don’t worry, I’ll show you the ropes.”

Suddenly, there was mirth in her eyes, which told him she wasn’t taking him entirely seriously. A chuckle left her lips to solidify it. “All right, Scout. My name’s Le… ehm,” she quickly corrected herself. “Chemist. Nice to meet you.”

She turned her eyes away from him to the crate on the ground. Scout would swear he heard something crawling in there. And… did it just wheek? Chemist immediately ducked next to it and gently spoke to the box in a language he couldn’t understand. Oh. So she was crazy too. Great. She would fit in without a problem.

Then she looked up from the ground at him with an apologetic smile on her lips, showing off her slightly crooked teeth. “Could you please show me the way to the base now? The heat is killing me.”

“I mean, yeah, sure! Let’s get you settled. I’ll introduce you to the guys too.”

“Much obliged.”

She picked the crate up and just barely lifted it from the ground, huffing and puffing all the way up. This wouldn’t do. She was only going to break her spine. “Wait. I can carry it for you if you wanna –“

“No, no, it’s fine. I can carry them.”

“Them? What do you mean?”

“My testing guinea pigs!” she flashed him a smile that was a bit strained because of the weight she was carrying. But despite her struggle, she could keep up with him just fine, once he remembered that he was walking with someone and shouldn’t go at his top speed. “I have six of them. Hope I can find them a good accommodation at the base.”

Scout could only shrug. He had no idea what keeping guinea pigs obtained. The only thing even remotely close was Chucklenuts, the squirrel he used to feed at the Boston commons park. Wonder where that little guy went. At any rate, the only other person who talked with so much pride about their pets – or testing subjects – as if they were their kids, while probably meaning to dissect them, was their Medic. They would make a perfect duo.

As they made their way towards the front entrance, Scout chattered about anything and everything that came to mind. Mostly about their coworkers, how difficult it is to carry the entire team on his shoulders, stuff like that. Chemist didn’t look impressed at all – was she even listening? Unfortunately for her, her complete lack of interest made him try even harder to catch her attention, so he was chattier than usual (he did pretty much the same with the other mercenaries too, especially Spy – anything to not go overlooked).

Shame their new coworker had to be such an ice queen.

They found most of the guys in the mess hall having breakfast. The only ones who seemed to be missing were Sniper, who preferred to eat in his camper like the asocial he was, and Medic. Good, good. At least they could get this over with quickly.

Once they entered, all eyes were on them. One could almost hear a pin drop with how the room went quiet all of the sudden.

“Um, hello?” Chemist awkwardly put the crate with guinea pigs down only to wave at their teammates, who eyed her as if she grew a second head. “I’m Chemist. Miss Pauling hired me as the new mercenary. I hope we’ll get along.”

It sounded as if she was rehearsing the part the entire walk here. Her accent got much more prominent when she was nervous too. Scout nudged her with his elbow to help her regain her composure. It didn’t seem to work, but she shot him what he interpreted to be a grateful look regardless.

Finally, he got some sort of reaction that wasn’t filled with disdain!

The first one to regain his composure was Engie. He got up, abandoning his eggs and bacon, and headed over to her with a grin on his face, giving her hand a nice firm shake.

“Howdy, Chemist. The name’s Engineer, or Engie for short. You need anything mechanical fixed, I’m your guy. Oh, and if anyone gives you trouble, you come to me and I’ll solve it for ya, all right?”

Engie’s words baffled Scout a little. Now, who would want to give this pipsqueak a hard time? They were all best friends here and she was one of them now, so why… Somehow, Engineer’s eyes wandered towards him.

Hey, screw you! Sure, I asked her out, but it’s not like I was really interested, ya know? Scout thought with cheeks burning red, but said nothing out loud. He suspected that if Engie knew about that, he would beat him to death with a wrench.

“Bah, stop scaring her!” Demo staggered towards them with a bottle. He too also shook her hand, but way sloppier than Engie did. Then he shoved the flask in her face. “Don’t worry, lass, no one will give ye any trouble! I’m Demoman, by the way. Wanna have a drink?”

The poor soul looked somehow even more concerned. She shot a glance at Scout, then at Engie and the others, as if to ask if this was normal in their line of work. “No, thank you. I can’t drink… how do you call –“ she kept snapping her fingers until finally, she looked up with an overjoyed look on her face – “ah! Spirits! Yes, I can’t drink spirits. It would tamper with my work.”

“Pff, this? This is just wee ole scrumpy! Hardly even proper booze. But I won’t force ye. Come see me any time if ye change yer mind.”

It didn’t look like she would. Her loss. Scout remembered when he was new to the team and Demo took him out for a drink. Hoo boy. He got back to his room on all fours that night! And he still wasn’t sure what happened with that fish.

As he was contemplating that eventful night – from which he didn’t remember all that much –, he didn’t even notice Pyro stalking close, stopping only a few feet from their recruit. Just looking with his head tilted to the side. Chemist seemed baffled by this. Maybe even a little bit creeped out. As she should. She smiled to mask her nervosity and once again raised her hand to wave at him. “Uh, hi? Who are you?”

“It’s all right,” Engie reassured her, but even he sounded tenser than before. It was crucial that Pyro took a liking to her. Otherwise, things could get messy. And without her being loaded into the respawn… “This is Pyro. He doesn’t talk much, but he’s a nice fella. Pyro, this is Chemist. She’s gonna work with us from now on.”

She nodded very slowly. Then, she offered him her hand to shake. “I see. Well, I’m looking forward to working with you, Pyro.”

That would be the first one.

Everyone waited with batted breath for what was going to happen. Pyro just stood there, staring at the outstretched hand. And then, before anyone could react, he lunged.

Scout might have passed out there for a few moments, because the next thing he saw, Pyro wrapped his arms around her in a hug. He nearly knocked her out of balance. Oh, phew! That was close! Toots had no idea how close she was to getting her head chopped off.

Awkward: “Oof!” left her lips and her hands flailed uselessly (she clearly hasn’t expected this outcome, and who could blame her – Pyro was known for being oddly affectionate in his own twisted way, but rarely like this on the first day) before instinct kicked in and they settled on Pyro’s shoulderblades as she returned the uncomfortable hug to her best capabilities.

“Aw, he likes you,” Engie chuckled, clearly relieved himself, but when he noticed the discomfort and confusion on Chemist’s face, he patted Pyro on the back, telling him without words to let go. And he did, albeit reluctantly. He always listened to Engie. “You must excuse him, he’s a bit cuddly, but he means you no harm. Isn’t that right, Pyro?”

Pyro hummed something that sounded vaguely like agreement.

Four down, three more to go. Not counting Snipes and Doc, of course.

She approached Soldier next. It was hard to tell what he thought about with that helmet of his blocking the view, but his posture was rigid and jaw set. He looked more like a drill sarge. Scout wouldn’t be much surprised if he immediately ordered Chemist to give him twenty.

That didn’t happen though. At least not yet. Instead, the poor girl went to shake his hand, only for him to avoid it and salute. Awkward. She quickly corrected her mistake and saluted back, but the harm was already done.

“At ease, private,” he bellowed, “I’m Soldier, and I won’t tolerate any slacking on this team! America depends on us. Am I being clear?”

Pfft. Did he even notice her accent? Scout might not be able to tell exactly where she was from (maybe Minnesota?), but she was clearly not an American. Maybe she wanted to say as much, but before she could open her mouth, Engie shook his head and mouthed: “Just play along.”

So she did.

“Oh, absolutely, Sir! God bless America!”

That was maybe a little bit overboard, but it worked. This display of “patriotism” seemed to placate Soldier, who turned sheepish, a big smirk crossing his face. “That’s the spirit, maggot! Now, what does a chemist do? How do you contribute to the team?”

“Well, we mostly make and sell pills, however…”

“Pills? So you make medicine.”

The girl hesitated a bit. “In theory, yes, but I…”

“You are a nurse then.”

She blinked. And then again. Looked at Soldier as if he was joking, but he wasn’t. She would soon come to realize that what Soldier had in brawn was compensated by his lack of wit. And that was coming from Scout, who was often told that he “fell out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down”.

“What? Oh, no, no, that’s not the same! You see, I have no medical training, I just…”

He patted her on the backpack with so much force that the poor girl nearly fell over. Scout had to catch her and help her back up. “No need to be ashamed of that! We all do what we have to do.”

Once she straightened up, she looked around for someone to explain it to the dimwit. But Demo just shrugged, whispering: “Eh, leave him to it, lass. He’ll catch up, eventually.”

God knows when that’s gonna be. But she obeyed in favor of meeting the last two of their group here – Heavy, still sitting by the table as if to not spook the girl out with his sheer size, and Spy, who stood away from the others, leaning against the wall and watching the whole endeavor. She first stopped by Heavy offering him a handshake just like the rest of them.

Knowing it was polite to stand when shaking hands, the giant reluctantly stood up. The sheer height difference was nearly comical. Standing, she just hardly reached his chest. Yet, she barely even batted an eye. Braver than she looked, that one. Or maybe more foolish.

“Heavy Weapons Guy,” Heavy grumbled as he was about to shake her hand… and it was then she winced and pulled away from him before they could even touch. Her expression changed too, from an anxious smile into a sneer.

“Pleased to meet you,” she gritted out but sounded anything but. No one could understand the sudden change in her demeanor, much less the poor confused Heavy. But neither of them wanted to make a fuss on her first day (perhaps she just gets startled very easily), so they let it slide.

Only one member in the room remained.

Spy put out his cigarette with a smirk on that smug face. Uh oh, that could only mean trouble. Scout instinctively stepped forward to put himself in between them – it was already bad enough that the snake was sleeping with his mother, he didn’t have to add their mutual coworker to his many conquests.

And don’t even get started about him trying to sleep with her first – that was totally different! At least he had no idea she was their new colleague. Oh, and he also wasn’t a few decades her senior.

But before he could make it to them, Spy started speaking in a language Scout has never heard before. It didn’t sound like French, but who knows? “Ten přízvuk poznávám. Čechoslovačka?”

And just like that, Chemist froze. What did that rat say to her?! Had to be something mean to render her speechless like that!

“Vy… vy umíte česky?” she asked, her voice breaking in the middle of the sentence as if she was fighting tears. Now that’s enough! Scout was about to roll up his sleeves and wipe that arrogant smile off of Spy’s ugly face – making a girl cry like this was a new low, even for him – but Engie stopped him before things could get messy.

Spy shrugged. “Trochu.”

That sealed the deal. Chemist abandoned everything, even her precious box of guinea pigs, which she kept eyeing anxiously every so often while making her rounds, and hurried over to Spy’s side. They were suddenly chatting like best buddies in that strange language. She sounded so… happy. Like Spy hung the moon and the stars himself and she was lucky to talk to him.

Scout could only stare at them with mouth wide open (Engie was kind enough to shut it for him). What the hell?! How come that backstabbing traitor always gets all the chicks? Maybe he should ask him for a few pointers on how to win over Miss Pauling. But on second thought, rather not. Who knows what he might want in return? Douchebag.

Soon, Spy rejoined them with Chemist on his arm. She was still grinning at something he said earlier, her pale cheeks rosy pink with color. Scout’s hands balled into fists. “Gentlemen, if you’ll excuse us, I will show Mademoiselle Chemist around, then take ‘er to the Medic’s office.”

“Eh, sure, Doc will want to see her as soon as possible. Welcome to the team, lass.”

She flashed Demo a small but grateful smile, still a bit hesitant around him, and then went to collect her crate. Spy didn’t even offer to carry it, but maybe she already told him not to.

He then asked: “Shall we?” to which she nodded.

As they made their way down the corridor, Scout finally woke up from his stupor and shouted: “Be careful, Miss Chemist! That man is a menace! A womanizer!”

If he had any self-reflection, which he did not, he would think that it was rich coming from him. But in his defense, she didn’t know Spy and how he bragged about banging Scout’s ma whenever he had the opportunity. Surely no girl liked sleazy morons who kiss and tell, right?

Sadly, it seemed like she didn’t hear him. She was busy laughing at another hilarious thing Spy had said.

Soldier shook his head. “Maggots. Still letting children fight their wars.”

For some reason, he looked in Scout’s direction while saying that. He let it slide, though. They were talking about her now, not about him. “Pfft, yeah. And what Spy’s doing? Gross! He could be her father, for Christ’s sake!”

Heavy’s eyes quickly darted to the ground. As did Engie’s, who awkwardly rubbed at the back of his neck, and also Demo’s. Seriously, what was wrong with them today?

Maybe it was because they had a girl on their team now. Yeah, that would make sense. It was… a lot to take in. Not just her presence here – it also meant they would have to fight a BLU chick now. Scout believed his ma raised him right, so he never even thought about hitting a girl before (if she didn’t strike first, of course). He would have to remind himself that out on the battlefield, she wasn’t a girl. She was a mercenary, just like the rest of them.

And she would be out for blood.

“Aaanyway,” Engie stretched his arms, “Administrator mentioned we’d be getting a free week to get used to our new teammate. We should make the most of the time. Take Chemist out on the field and show her the ropes. Once she settles in, of course – does tomorrow work for you?”

They all hummed in agreement. Wooh, an entire week off! Scout was already looking forward to it. And he had to admit, he was also a little bit curious how well would Chemist fare on the battlefield. Being able to make pills didn’t sound like much of fighting ability. Unless she was supposed to replenish medkits faster? Who knows.

They would have to wait to see for themselves.

Translations:

Spy: Ten přízvuk poznávám. Čechoslovačka? – I recognize that accent. Are you Czechoslovakian? Chemist: Vy… vy umíte česky? – You… you can speak Czech? Spy: Trochu. – A little bit.

12 notes · View notes

520shikikan · 6 months

Text

I Want To Be Yours

Pair: Lee x Polaris Category: Yume/self-ship, Canonverse, Fluff Content Warning: Slight White Day event story and Entropy affection story spoilers Chapter: One-shot

It was his decision to make his commandant as his lover after careful consideration.

That day was yet another busy day for Polaris. The same old work with papers and reports, as Gray Raven had not been dispatched to a surface mission since a few weeks ago. Even if Polaris herself found surface missions to be dangerous and energy-draining, at least it was less boring than making reports, sending data, or signing countless documents. But that was her duty, and her source of happiness--she still enjoyed working as a commandant, and her job was a way for her to throw her past behind. Being in Gray Raven had calmed her soul down, even when the field was full of tumultuous battles.

Exhausted with work, the commandant decided to look around to rest her eyes on the screen, and at the center of the office was Lucia, who was busy helping Polaris with her work. Even Polaris didn't understand why she was there, sitting on the couch and sorting her document archives. The only conclusion she could get was that Lucia did not want her to shoulder everything alone. Polaris was a bit confused but ended up accepting her help. Perhaps Lucia was right, she mustn't work alone all the time.

Her eyes wandered again, this time noticing Liv. Her hands were busy making some crafts, possibly to decorate their shared office or to decorate her dormitory. Regardless of her reason for making those crafts shaped like sheep, rabbits, frogs, and other kinds of animals, Polaris liked the look of the crafts. But due to not wanting to disturb Liv's concentration, Polaris refrained from telling Liv that she was doing a good job with making the crafts. Instead, she focused again on her work and finished whatever she was told while they were not out on a surface mission. Slacking off too much won't be a good thing.

For what felt like an eternity, Polaris' attention was on her work. She had finished two reports about Gray Raven's activities within the past month as well as their latest surface missions, and replying to some important e-mails from Celica, until she was checking one more e-mail from Celica. One that surprised her the most due to the contents inside of it, as well as the sender of the e-mail.

Dear Polaris,

I hope this e-mail finds you well. My name is Allen, and I am writing on behalf of the World Government Association of Art. I would like to extend a warm invitation to you and Gray Raven to attend our banquet at the Main Hall of the World Government Association of Art's building. I and all executive staff of the World Government Association of Art had discussed with Eden Government's executive figures before writing this mail to invite you and Gray Raven as a whole, and after receiving their approval, I have decided to write this invitation to you.

We, the World Government Association of Art, are hoping that you would like to come and present a speech about the progress of Gray Raven's future plans in hopes of lifting the beliefs and spirits of the other banquet attendees. We believe you are more than capable of being our fire of hope in this chaotic, dystopian world. You can also allow Gray Raven to speak about their hopes for the future as well, should you wish for them to say a few words as well.

Your and Gray Raven's presence would mean so much to every attendee, as well as to me and the World Government Association of Art as a whole. We hope that you and Gray Raven can attend our event. A follow-up mail will be sent about the date of the banquet to you, two days before the event.

Sincerely,

Allen

President of World Government Association of Art

For a moment, Polaris could not believe her eyes. Being invited to a banquet at WGAA and giving an inspirational speech was not on her list of things that could happen during the current month. For better or worse, all of Gray Raven was invited, and the event was going to be held within a few days. She could've sworn that she panicked inside, but managed to keep herself together for the time being.

"Lucia, Liv." She called the two girls calmly. At the voice of their commandant, the two girls quickly got up and approached Polaris' desk, their eyes showing a mixture of curiosity and concern. "Something that we can help with, Commandant?" Polaris shook her head. "Nothing, I only wanted to announce something. I will send comms to Lee, he also needs to be here. This is pretty important, I think."

Opening her comms terminal, Polaris sent a voice message to Lee, ordering him to come quickly to her office. At this point in time, Polaris was familiar enough with Lee's schedule from her observations of his activities. Lee's activity at this hour was to be in his personal workspace doing whatever he wanted, just a few rooms away from the Gray Raven's main office. It took a while for Lee to finish his work, before giving Polaris a quick, short reply to her voice message. Be there in a second, it read.

After a few more minutes of waiting, Lee finally entered the main office. He received expectant looks from the other three, but the look that caught his attention the most was the look from the commandant herself. He could've sworn the thermal modules were burning again but to a lesser degree than the ones he usually felt. "What is it, Commandant?"

Satisfied, Polaris clapped her hands. Taking a deep breath, she began explaining the reason why she gathered all of them inside the office. "So, for... whatever reason, WGAA has invited all of us to come to their banquet on Saturday. I was expected to give a speech, and the important guy from WGAA said that you guys could give a speech of your own if any of you would like to. Not mandatory, but you can."

Lucia, Liv, and Lee nodded in understanding, yet Polaris could see a tinge of surprise in all of the Construct's eyes. She felt a bit of relief in her chest, knowing that her squad was equally surprised as her. Or better, knowing that there's a probability that they were also as nervous as her. For a moment, Polaris continued to observe them in silence, as if she was waiting for an answer from the three Constructs before her.

"Perhaps I should give a speech too, as I am Gray Raven's captain. Would you mind that, Commandant?" Lucia asked Polaris. From her tone, Polaris knew that she was determined to help lessen the burden of speaking in front of many people, and she also wanted to carry out her duty as a captain. Lee and Liv, on the other hand, did not say a thing, indicating their refusal to say anything at the banquet. Polaris clapped again, satisfied that everything was settled. "Great. Lucia and I will give some words to the attendees, you both can wait. The banquet is in a few days, so you might want to prepare your best outfits. I will also do the same."

"Roger, Commandant!"

Polaris nodded in satisfaction and dismissed her squad. Lucia and Liv immediately returned to what they were doing until they were done, leaving for their own quarters. Lee also did the same, walking out of the office to head to his room while thinking of his commandant's words. Yet before Lee had left the office completely, he heard a voice call out to him.

"Lee, I look forward to what you'll be wearing."

"It's probably the same suit you've seen me wearing, but I'll make it clean and crisp for the event."

In his room, Lee pondered in front of his coating wardrobe. His thoughts drifted back to the day when he wore that suit. He remembered he wore that suit when he and the Gray Ravens were out on a special mission to entertain children at an event. He would perform various magic tricks, and gain reward tickets for it. He also remembered how he performed tricks at the streets during the same event and made sure his angle was perfect for the commandant herself to see, and tell her about the secrets of some of his magic tricks. Lee remembered it all fondly.

But the memory that Lee remembered best, was how he made a flurry of paper roses that rained down, and many people picked a rose to give to their special ones. He would never admit it, but he considered the gesture sweet. And for his commandant specifically, he hid a small package of chocolate inside the petals. It made him flustered, but what made him even more flustered was the fact that all the events had happened after that day.

The day they professed their feelings for one another on The Nighter.

Lee was aware of his commandant's feelings, and so did Polaris with his. However, it had stopped at that and never went further. They had no "status". They did not specify it at all. To them, acknowledging and accepting one another's feelings were more than enough. After all, he and Polaris were living in what seemed to be an endless war. A wrong decision, and their relationship would be over.

But today, Lee somehow felt differently about the idea.

Lee began to think, what if others would approach the commandant, and profess their love? What if the others would make her leave him, as they still had no relationship status at all? What if he lost Polaris? Those thoughts began to fill his mind, and it was making him feel uneasy. He also thought, now that he and Polaris had gone quite far in their relationship, why not make things official with her?

But again, Lee was still hesitant. He had the possibility of forcing his feelings too much towards Polaris should he ever voice his desire to make Polaris his girlfriend. More importantly, would she agree to his request? Lee knew that commitments were not Polaris' forte, and she preferred things to be more open-ended. Asking Polaris to be his might lead to him losing her, so in the end, Lee decided to keep quiet.

"... I'll think of it some other time," Lee mused. He then proceeded to browse the clothes inside his coating wardrobe and took a good look at the coating he wore during that event. Without realizing it, Lee had a small smile plastered on his face. His artificial heart's beating rate also grew. Was he excited? Probably yes. But like usual, Lee would never voice it out.

Back in the office, Polaris was still busy with her work. Luckily, Polaris only needed to reply to a few more e-mails and send some documents before she could finish and prepare for the banquet. She had to make sure that she had the appropriate attire to attend the event, and soon after she finished her work, Polaris immediately headed to her dormitory to look at her wardrobe. She had an assortment of clothes, yet none seemed to suit the occasion. Polaris began to wonder, was she too focused on her job that she barely had time to buy clothes, or add more variations to her wardrobe? But then again, her job was always related to office work or combat. If she was not working, she would only wear casual clothes.

"I need to get clothes for formal occasions today. I need at least two or three dresses, just in case I will be invited to more of these things."

Polaris closed her wardrobe doors slowly with thoughts of going shopping in her mind. Afterward, she checked her current amount of Black Cards inside her account. "This is probably enough," Polaris muttered to herself. A sigh of relief escaped the commandant's lips, knowing she had enough time and money to buy her something nice later on the streets of Babylonia before the banquet. Deciding that she would prepare ahead of time instead of the last minute, she took off her coat and threw it aside before heading out from the main office. After all, she was done with her work–she could do whatever she wanted.

Outside, Polaris was met with the sight of Lee, who seemed to be done with his crafts inside his dormitory and decided to head out for himself. When he saw Polaris, he had a strange look on his face, as if he was scanning Polaris in a way. "Going somewhere, Commandant?" Lee asked, to which Polaris replied with a simple nod. She had guessed that Lee was just curious about where she was heading, hence making her walk past Lee while keeping quiet.

But Lee wasn't going to buy her silence just like that.

Quickly, he followed Polaris and caught up to her, before matching his walking pace with hers. His actions were met with a look of surprise from Polaris, yet she decided to leave him be and let him follow her. As they walked together outside the building, Polaris decided to ask the blond Construct the question she just had in mind: "Why did you decide to follow me?"

Lee only replied with a shrug and kept quiet. But should anyone look close enough, the heat in his thermal module was rising. His mind also replayed a scene from his memory, back to the times when Polaris would accompany him to buy a chip when her small dancing robot was broken and needed a chip replacement. He knew that to him and Polaris, that day felt like a date, even when it was not one and they were yet to develop feelings for one another. Another memory of the "date" that Lee remembered was the way he tugged at Polaris' arm and pulled her away when a girl walked up to him and asked for his number. Now that Lee thought of it, he was a bit out of his mind when he just pulled Polaris away like that. It's as if he was pulling away his girlfriend when she wasn't even his.

"... I only wanted to accompany you. Just think of it as my way of repaying you for accompanying me back when I was buying the chip for your robot. Plus, going outside alone for a woman isn't the best idea."

Polaris nodded in acknowledgment, now that she knew of Lee's intent to follow her outside. Lee's second statement, however, intrigued her in a way. Did he mean that he wanted to protect her from men who could harass her? Polaris would never know, but that was her safest bet considering Lee's earlier statement. The pair kept silent on their way out until they reached Babylonia's shopping district. It puzzled Lee a little for her to be here.

"Why here, out of all places?" Lee asked, his blue eyes looking intently at Polaris. What puzzled him even more, was that Polaris was looking for a boutique. Polaris chose to keep her mouth shut, however, and continued walking towards a boutique that sold fancy dresses. When Lee followed her inside the boutique and browsed through the dresses, he finally understood why Polaris would head to a boutique. She was there to get herself a new dress for the banquet.

Lee kept on following Polaris around, accompanying her browse through the dresses. For some reason, he had an urge to help Polaris pick a dress but he decided to stay silent for the time being and let his commandant choose what she wanted. The first dress she had an eye on was a black high-low dress with silver ornaments. Polaris thought that the dress was pretty, but decided against buying it because of the sudden discomfort she had when imagining herself in it. The second one she had an eye on was a halter dress. It was black in color, but she considered it too plain in terms of design due to the lack of ornaments on it. The third one was a wrap dress with a large, white silk ribbon and some sparkles to decorate it. Even so, Polaris was still not a fan of the dress silhouette, and only loved the silk ribbon. Sighing, Polaris looked at Lee like she was begging for him to help her choose. Lee took notice and nodded at Polaris with confidence. "My fashion sense is good enough. I'll help you pick. You can sit somewhere, Commandant," Lee instructed.

As Lee told, the commandant took a seat at one of the small chairs inside the boutique while Lee moved around to choose a dress for her. Polaris felt a bit concerned, yet she would trust Lee's judgment for today. Lee, on the other hand, walked around the boutique and browsed through the dresses. He considered Ris' preference to even the smallest details like the decorative aspects. It took Lee a while until he came back to his commandant with a black knee-length tulle dress with black lace on the upper parts. The outermost layer of the dress also had a white gradient, and not much sparkles were present--just the way Polaris preferred. Walking back to Polaris, he presented her with his dress of choice.

The commandant could not believe her eyes. Lee just picked out a dress, a beautiful one, even. When asked about the price, Lee replied, "It's affordable for you. 4,500 Black Cards, while you've saved up for more than 700,000." He remarked while showing the price tag to his commandant. Excited, she took the dress from Lee and headed for the fitting room to try it out for herself. The dress suited her perfectly, but she still decided to ask Lee for his opinion on the dress. Coming out from the fitting room, she called out to Lee. "So... Does this suit me enough?"

Lee swore that the heat inside his modules was rising again. The sight of his commandant wearing such a pretty dress and the idea of seeing her in that with other accessories during the banquet made him feel both flustered and excited at the same time. "... Good enough, Commandant," Lee remarked. Even with his words that sounded harsh, Polaris could tell that it was his way of telling her that she looked good, and that was how it always been.

After gaining Lee's approval, Polaris headed back to the fitting room to change back into her regular clothes. She planned to buy only that dress for the occasion and after changing back, she and Lee immediately headed for the cashier. When Polaris paid for her dress, the store clerk said to her, "Such a nice dress! And I saw that your partner chose it for you, too. How sweet of him!"

Polaris scratched her head nervously at the remark. This was not the first time that people called Lee as her partner. In fact, this was probably the tenth time someone would say it. She has heard things from other commandants about how close she was towards Lee, and she even heard from neighboring squads and even from Lee's brother Murray. "N-no, he's not my partner. He's just a colleague from my workplace who happened to pass by my workplace, and he decided to accompany me while I go shopping," Polaris remarked, defending herself from the claim. In addition, Lee also nodded at Polaris' words and making it seem like he agreed with her, even if he was in the colleague-zone. At least, they confessed to each other on the Kowloong Nighter at some point in time.

Done with their shopping, the pair walked outside the boutique and took in the air of Babylonia's artificial atmosphere. Polaris was about to ask Lee whether he wanted to head elsewhere than just shopping, but Lee already had a destination in mind. "I will be outside for long. I just remembered that I had to grab a few stuff, and it's probably better for you not to follow me around. You'll get exhausted," Lee remarked. "I'll be sure to be back before six in the evening. Be careful on your way back, Commandant."

Lee turned his back from Polaris and walked towards the distance. Polaris was a bit confused, but decided to shrug it off and head back. She understood that Lee was worried about her stamina, and heading back was her best option. Following Lee around while he was shopping would only lead him into scolding her, so Polaris took her leave back to the office. A mixture of happiness and disappointment was inside her chest–Polaris was glad that Lee chose a dress for her, but she felt a bit disappointed that she didn't get to accompany Lee outside for longer.

"I should head back," Polaris muttered to herself. Turning her heel, she headed back to the Gray Raven office with her new dress in hand. As for Lee, he headed elsewhere--one that his commandant probably won't bother to ask about. He had his own agenda to fulfill, and he refused to explain to his commandant until the time was finally right.

The few days passed like the blink of an eye for Gray Raven. Polaris and Lucia had prepared their speeches, the follow-up mail about the set date was already received and read, and each Gray Raven members had chosen their attire for the event. Tonight was their big night, and so they had to look their best.

Especially the commandant, who had been staring in front of her vanity mirror for a few minutes.

Polaris had applied her make-up and wore the dress she bought a few days prior, yet she felt like something was off about her. Seeing herself in the mirror all dolled up felt off for her–it did not feel like her, if anything. Her style had never been this feminine, and so Polaris felt a bit nervous to go out in such manner. Moreover, the speech she was going to give was nerve-racking. The eyes would all be on her, and she mustn't mess up.

"Nngh..." Polaris grunted. She felt like her stomach was being churned from the anxiety. Failure had always been her biggest enemy, and should she mess up during her speech, she would feel like she wanted to bury herself six meters deep under the ground.

In the midst of her thoughts, a knock on the metal door of her quarters snapped her out. Polaris quickly opened the door, revealing Lee with a white, medium-sized box in his hand. "I see that you're ready, Commandant. Here, I brought you something. It's up to you whether you want to wear them today or not."

Lee left her quarters as abruptly as he arrived, leaving the commandant in confusion. Polaris closed the door before she took a good, long look at the box. It had nothing like a logo on it, suggesting that the box was from Lee himself. Curious, she opened the box slowly and saw its contents--a pair of black lace gloves, earrings, and a card that read, "Think of these as my gratitude for you, Commandant. Good luck with your speech later."

At that moment, Polaris could've sworn she had a dumb smile on her face as she slipped her hands inside the gloves. But for a moment, she hesitated to wear the earrings due to her feelings of discontent in giving herself more accessories.

But well, it was for Lee's sake anyway. Might as well make him happy.

Luckily, all she had to do was clip them on her ears and she was ready for the night's big event. Once she was all set, she headed out from her quarters and meet up with her squad.

The WGAA main hall was filled with many important guests from equally many factions, some of which are acquaintances to Allen himself. For the commandant, it was nerve-racking to know that she would be speaking to that many people in one venue. As she was connected to Lucia at that time, the female Construct could feel how nervous her commandant was. "We will nail this, Commandant," Lucia reassured, patting Polaris on her shoulder. "Liv and Lee would be watching us too, so just focus on them and pretend no one else are here."

Lucia's words encouraged Polaris enough, and during their time to head on the stage, they were prepared and ready. Polaris felt like there were no eyes that were going to judge her, and the focus on her mind was on Gray Raven. She knew that they would still love her regardless of the mistakes she made while delivering her speech. The event began with a greeting from Allen himself, before it was time for the Gray Raven commandant to take the stage.

The greeting and first few paragraphs of Polaris' speech was pretty well, with her addressing many issues smoothly. Her voice was clear, unlike how she would usually talk in her workplace. For the first time after a few years that had passed, she felt quite alive to talk in front of others. Gray Raven got her back, after all.

For a few more paragraphs, Polaris was doing great. Lucia, who was looking at her commandant's performance, lightly clapped her hand. The sight of her commandant being in her zone was a rare sight in her eyes, and she loved every second of it. Unfortunately, Lucia's excitement didn't last long the moment Polaris' mind blanked out. To make matters worse, she spotted someone giving her commandant a few looks of displeasure as if to show disgust.

And to Polaris, the one who saw it all, it stung her a little. But she had to focus herself again before she could finally finish her speech. A few seconds of backtracking later, and she managed to finish her speech with an apology, a thank you, and a polite bow towards the audience before exhaling in relief and left the stage for Lucia's speech. Below, she was met with an equally excited Liv, and a proud Lee.

"You did amazing, Commandant!"

"I agree. You may have blanked out a little back there, but it wasn't bad."

Polaris was relieved. The sight of the people with the disgusted looks seemed to have just disappeared from her mind at the sight of her teammates. And for a few more minutes, her gaze was locked on Lucia's figure. The way she delivered everything was perfect, and her exxpression showed resolution in every word she spoke. As Lucia's commandant, she loved how alive Lucia felt there too.

"And that concludes what I could deliver tonight. Thank you very much for your attention."

Lucia bowed down to the audience, and then followed with the sound of people clapping as she got down from the stage. Once she was back with her squad, she gave a cue for all of Gray Raven to do a fistbump like how they once did in Kowloong some time ago. After a closing from Allen, they proceeded to enjoy the night like how they originally intended while live music played in the background to liven up the atmosphere. Lucia quickly headed to the sweets corner, while Liv was being approached by women and girls who were invited to the banquet for small talk. Polaris on the other hand, headed to the drinks area. The melon-flavored syrup drink attracted her eyes, and she wanted to have a sip of that. On the other hand, Lee decided to go away from the crowd while no one was looking. The stairs that lead to the upper corridors of the WGAA building caught Lee's attention, and he decided to head upstairs for a little alone time before going back to his commandant and squad.

Lee saw the endless void of space through the windows. He knew that it was probably an illusory space created to project the times where Earth was still the blue planet it once was before the Punishing Virus broke out at some point, but it didn't matter–it was beautiful, and he was going to keep his eyes on the sight while his mind wandered around in a reverie. Lee's thoughts from a few days back began to intensify. He really wanted to say it–say that he wanted to officially make Polaris his girlfriend. Say that he wanted to be the only person that would take care if her. Say that he wanted to be the one who would protect her.

But of course, his anxiety was still there. The fear of rejection, the feeling of getting pushed away by the commandant that he had devoted himself to. He didn't want any of those to happen. Sighing, Lee closed his eyes for a few moments to focus himself again. He felt like he was being illogical for wanting to claim his commandant all to himself and thinking about his emotions too much. But that side of him–the side he had when he was still known as Morian, was still right there somewhere in his M.I.N.D. and begged him to just give in to his feelings. The conflicting thoughts led Lee nowhere, and he felt himself getting more unstable. Was he on the verge of tears? Lee didn't know, but he hated it for sure.

Lee almost fell completely into his negative feelings, but then he felt a familiar voice call out to him in worry. Turning his head to the voice's direction, he saw Polaris looking at him in worry. "I have kept connections with all of Gray Raven's M.I.N.D. system, but yours is the most unstable, Lee. Something wrong?"

The blonde Construct flinched upon hearing his commandant's words. So she had been keeping herself connected, Lee thought. As much as he was flustered to admit that his M.I.N.D. was unstable from all the thoughts he had, he felt relieved that Polaris was there. Lee was considering to use this as a chance, but he had to confirm that everything was under control.

"Not much. Just some crazy fluctuations, but I'm glad you are here."

"... If you say so."

Polaris decided that she would have to keep Lee company for a while, in case the fluctuations happen again. But due to how she kept herself connected, she could still feel the tension coming from Lee like he wanted to say something he had long kept in mind but did not dare to say a word about it. "Lee, you know you can trust me. Do you want to say something to me?" Polaris asked again with the same concerned tone as before. "I can't understand M.I.N.D. fluctuations, so it's better to tell me if you got something that you're worried about."

Hearing his commandant's words, Lee only sighed and averted his gaze to the window. His mind was still weighing all the options and results he could get from asking his commandant out, causing more fluctuations in his system. Polaris clearly did not like it, making her cut her connection with Lee and rushed to hold his metal fingers. Cold, Polaris thought. But at least her hands were warm enough to ease the tension Lee felt in one way or another.

Lee flinched at the gesture. Never in his life he thought that he would hold hands with a woman–one that he had feelings and cared for the most, even. Awkwardly, he let himself hold Polaris' hand back while looking away from her as the heat inside his thermal modules rose. The tension calmed down a little, but Polaris could still feel it. Deciding that she should reattempt to calm down the blonde Construct for one last time, she chose to scold him. "Lee, I really don't know what's with you tonight, but I wish to know. Tell me everything–I want to help."

Feeling the force coming from his commandant's words, Lee relented and took a deep breath. Afterwards, he looked over to the commandant and locked his gaze with hers. Despite the countless possibilities of responses, Lee decided to take the chance. To Lee, it's better than regret. He had many regrets already, and he did not want to have them in those moments like what he was having at that moment. "Commandant, we live in a tumoltuous world, we knew that already. And I also knew that it was the reason why you chose not to specify our relationship. But tonight, I wanted to make things different."

Lee stayed silent for a while, then continued his words as he finally looked at his commandant. "I just... want to be yours, Commandant. Sure, a relationship may not work in this universe, but I want to try and make things work. So, Commandant... Do you wish to be mine?"

Polaris couldn't believe her ears. Lee was asking her to be his lover right in front of her. Blood rushed to the commandant's cheeks, and the grip she had on Lee's hand grew tighter. Polaris let out a small squeak in an attempt to respond, but no words came out from her lips from how flustered she was at the Lee's request to be her lover. "It's okay, Commandant. I understand that you may not want to, but–"

"No, Lee. I want to be yours."

Lee swore that his heat regulation module was going overdrive. Polaris accepted him. However, he had to keep a calm look on his face, resulting in them awkwardly holding hands while the light from the scenery behind them illuminated the dim corridor. Polaris' face was blushing, while Lee averted his gaze from his commandant and held his chin with his right hand. They stayed in position for a long while, until Polaris proposed to go back to the first floor.

"Oh, um... Should we head back now?"

"Y-yes. We should. Gray Raven might be looking for us."

Polaris and Lee headed downstairs together, still hand-in-hand. It all still felt awkward and different, especially with their status after they finally sealed their relationship. But they were also looking forward to their future. Even if they knew that the road ahead won't be smooth, they knew they would still have each other. They would still continue helping and protecting one another like before. Be it as a commandant and aide or as lovers, they would still be doing the same thing no matter which universe they were in.

That was their choice, and that was a choice they would never regret.

#520posting #leeris

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darkx-the-dragon-kn1ght · 1 year

Text

Chapter 2- Part 5

“Instead”??? Does that mean he tried to take on some other Pokémon League? Is he from some other region? Or…is he talking about the Reborn League from before that big disaster Ame brought up?

Oh, NOW we’re talking! Giving Riptide his first taste of action!

YEAH!

NO!

First thing I figured out- the text when you enter a battle autoscrolls, so getting screenshots in that regard is gonna be a bit difficult, oh boy…

This music, though- it sounds like a remix of Iris’ Champion battle, from Black 2/White 2. I wonder…hold on.

One YouTube search later…

Yup, it’s GlitchxCity’s remix! I know the main page on the website said GlitchxCity music would feature in this game, but I didn’t think it’d be showing up this early.

But back to the topic of difficulty. One of the other things I heard about this game is that it’s really tough. Like- there’s competitive-level strategies in some cases, apparently. But I mean- this is the first battle, how hard can this one be?

The plan is to start by using Leer on the Nidoran, and what was really helpful was Nidoran missing its Tackle here (which I couldn’t fully screenshot because, again, autoscroll)! I’ll take that, saving HP is always good-

Also, if you noticed those little honeycomb-looking things next to the HP bars- seems like those are meant to represent the seven stats of a Pokémon (Attack, Special Attack, Defense, Special Defense, Speed, Accuracy, and Evasion). The symbols are so small though, it’s a bit tough to tell what some of them are…but I’m sure I’ll learn in due time.

Regardless, with Nidoran’s Defense lowered, Riptide should have the upper hand in finishing Nidoran off. It becomes a back-and-forth of Tackles and Scratches, and…

Riptide wins!! And gets his very first level-up, with a new move to boot! Water Gun’s gonna be useful, STAB is always good to have.

REMOVE THAT FLIRTATIOUS TILDA, SIR-

But wait- this victory music…I recognize this music! It’s-

One other YouTube search later…

GLITCHXCITY’S DIALGA’S FIGHT TO THE FINISH REMIX?? That’s the music they used for the victory theme?? I’m not lingering on this screen long enough to hear if it’s just the opening few seconds or the entire theme, but if it’s the latter- I dunno, seems a bit intense still for the victory theme, isn’t it? I like the song, don’t get me wrong, just…a choice for this particular context, that’s for sure-

Oh, yeah, I saw that when Victoria was leading Xera in. Again, nice that it’s so close by.

Yup, this is certainly a Pokémon Center, one of the Pokémon Centers of all time indeed.

Oh and Ame and Victoria are back-

lol not important enough for Ame to remember-

Cain, Xera can have Riptide test out his new Water Gun on you, you’re aware of that right-

Victoria don’t humor him-

THIS IS SLANDER?? Cain!! You can’t just mess with Xera’s chances with a cute girl when you’ve all just met!! You fool!!

...Yeah I might be shipping the player character with one of the rivals right off the bat, what're you gonna do, sue me?

Oh, we get to see the starter Victoria was planning on picking! Perfect, and it’ll be even more experience for Riptide!

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fullscoreshenanigans · 2 years

Text

Decided to make this separate post from the Ray as the family memory keeper post.

#I know this memory keeper aspect tends to be used for Emma's sake in fics #But it would definitely add more depth if the other older siblings were mentioned too (via @thathilomgirl)

There definitely is thematic beauty in the boy who remembered everything and the girl who lost her memory that’s just *chef’s kiss*, and I’m not going to chide people for exploring that because I also enjoy that content lol

But something I’ve talked about a bit before is how I think this due to a combination of Shirai purposefully not fleshing out the supporting cast as much as he could have to avoid extraneous narrative branches

(Source: Chapter 2 of the Mystic Code Book translated by @1000sunnygo)

and how fandom in general tends to gravitate toward shipping, so you have the glut of the content centered around the main trio since they’re the ones with the most development and focus across the entire narrative. Something I entirely get and again am not going to chide people over because I also enjoy that content a lot (hence the url).

Yet at the same time, one of the most compelling things about these three for me is how the love they feel for their entire family is so integral to their characters. The entire escape plays out the way it does because Emma vehemently refused to leave any of her family behind from the get-go. Norman’s plan to eradicate the demons was so his family (and all the cattle children) could live freely without the fear of being eaten. One of the most important lessons Ray learns from the escape arc is that it’s okay to hope and see a world outside the scope of just Emma and Norman. Everyone is able to endure Emma’s disappearance instead of succumb to prolonged despair because they have each other. Their family enriches their lives, pushes them to strive for the better, and supports them—the latter point emphasized in the most heartbreaking way via the contrast the series makes with Isabella in chapter 37/S1e12:

Both mediums intentionally choose to incorporate a visual of a lone Isabella standing atop the wall, zoomed out to highlight just how small and alone she is in her realization. Despite loving her fellow orphans at Grace Field, she didn’t have the support network the trio had to resist succumbing to the same system that oppressed countless generations before her, while a then-Mom Sarah essentially offers her the same (non-)choice she offers to Emma.

We don’t get to see as much of this in the anime due to budget and time, but below the cut is a non-exhaustive collection of interactions Demizu incorporated into the manga to help reinforce the importance of the younger kids in the trio’s lives and vice versa (with a couple from the anime that I thought it did better). I wanted to focus mostly on the smaller ones that people might not fully register while reading through the first time; there are a few larger ones that are more likely to stand out in people’s memories, but I love them a lot so I included them (up through chapter 48 because I fought with tumblr for an hour over how many images are in here):

(Chapter 1: Emma wrangling all the kids in her room in the morning.)

(Chapter 1: Norman, Emma, Mike, and an unnamed gray-haired girl helping Isabella with food prep while Ray scolds Lanni in the background.)

(Chapter 8: Ray patting Thoma on the head as he provides pointers for how he can improve playing tag while Mark listens in interest. In the anime, the pat is missing during their brief exchange in S1e03. </3 However, Dalia and Nina are now present.)

(Chapter 9: Phil, Thoma, Lanni, Mike, and other children dragging Ray to play tag with them and Krone.)

(Cropped Chapter 10 chapter art, with which I’m sort of cheating since it didn’t actually happen in canon, but it’s representative of how all three desire to protect their younger siblings from harm, even Ray who is prioritizing Emma and Norman’s survival at this point in the story. One of many symbolic artworks, but this is the only one I’ll include.)

(Chapter 10: Emma giving Phil a piggyback ride as she tries to come to terms with the possibility of one of her dear siblings betraying her, showcasing just how common it is for her siblings to seek her out to interact and play with her. From right to left, top to bottom: Damdin, Lanni, Thoma, Jemima, Mark, Don, Gilda, Charlie, Anna, Phil, Vivian, unnamed gray-haired girl, Eugene, Alicia.)

(Chapter 14: Emma, Carol, Gilda, and Phil greeting Ray after his meeting with Norman about the traitor and how they should proceed with the escape plan.)

(Chapter 15: Norman being awoken from his nightmare by Damdin and Sherry. The hug from their older brother is just as much of a comfort for him as it is for them; another reminder of why he chooses to remain steadfast in supporting Emma’s goal of bringing everyone and the conclusion he reaches for himself in Chapter 14:)

(Chapter 19: another piece of cover art, but unlike the one from chapter 10 this one is of a flashback. Besides the full score trio, it features Don, possibly the boy from the null score trio featured in chapter 181.1, Gilda, and Anna. For a brief overview of specifically the progression of Don and Ray’s relationship, see this post.)

(Chapter 21: Emma pulling Gilda and Don aside while Norman distracts Ray from her implementing their plan to go against his wishes by slowly bringing the younger kids in on it, starting with Anna, Nat, Thoma, and Lanni during the meeting with Krone planned for later that night.)

(Chapter 22: Ray instructing the children around him with a stern look on hi face, meanwhile they’re all giggling in delight. Norman can all be seen instructing some little ones further back.)

(Chapter 28: the children’s reaction to Norman being “adopted.” Thoma and Lanni are aware of how dire the situation is at this point, having listened to the conversation with Krone, and Phil has an inkling something is off, but the rest of the young ones are happy he’s found a home with a new family, though Sherry is taking it rather hard.)

(Chapter 28: Don, Nat, Marnya, and some other children happily playing with Norman on his last day at the house.)

(Chapter 31: Thoma, Lanni, Anna, and Phil trying to comfort a [seemingly] distraught Emma after Norman’s shipment.)

(Chapter 34: Mike hugging Norman during his over voice of his letter to Emma explaining the plan to her.)

(Chapter 34: Yvette happily letting Norman borrow some paper for him to write his letter on during the same flashback. This is expanded to include him interacting with Alicia and Jemima in S1e11 of the anime, who are also happy to see and spend more time with him on his last day there:)

(Chapter 34: Lanni and Thoma guiding Ray to where the rest of the escapees are while he’s disoriented from having his entire plan and worldview flipped on its axis.)

(Chapter 34: Thoma helping Emma with her backpack as she checks in with everyone to make sure they deactivated their tracking devices. Chris and Anna are shown worrying about her ear [since nowhere in the plan does it say she should cut it off. To this day I’m wondering what Norman wrote in the letter for what she’s supposed to do here; have Ray, Thoma, or Lanni cut out her tracker so she could hold it in her pocket until she ditches it to distract Isabella, but they ran out of time?], but Emma asks for her to wait until later.)

(Chapter 35: Gilda, Anna, and Emma helping the younger kids up the wall. Ray, despite still being bewildered by what is happening, spares a moment to pat Alicia’s head, both to steady her if she needs it and to reassure himself he’ll be able to help her if she does.)

(Chapter 35 Side Scene: Emma comforting Phil after he confirms with her that Norman was harvested. He thinks back to his last exchange with Norman where his older brother trusted him to help Emma as best as he could. In the present, he thinks of his five oldest living siblings by name while steeling his resolve to distract Isabella and buy the escapees a few more minutes of time.)

(Chapter 36: Emma encouraging Chris and Mark about ziplining across the canyon. Nat, ever a distinguished lad as he raises his pinky, encourages his older brother in his trademark playful charismatic fashion before he ziplines across.)

(Chapter 36: Ray picking up and comforting a terrified Jemima on top of the wall. He, Jemima, Thoma, Lanni, and Emma are the only ones left on their side of the canyon, so while he leaves it open for them to find an alternative way across in the form of a question [in his lightly teasing older brother way, to not scare them further by panicking or acting radically out of character], he hopes his taking Jemima across will give them enough encouragement to make it themselves.)

(Chapter 36: Ray summing up what he’s learned over the arc—that alone we are near powerless to stop oppressive systems but through collective effort they can be toppled, that it’s okay to hope for a better tomorrow and have faith in the friends and family around you, that his family loves him dearly and believes he’s worth saving, that he can help them more by living rather than dying—with my small alteration of switching “wish” to “hope” in the textbox next to Chris just because I like how that flows more. Fun fact these two pages wreck me.)

(Chapter 38: Ray vowing to protect the family he believed there was no way for him to save if he wanted to ensure Emma and Norman’s survival. While he never acts maliciously or cruelly toward his siblings, he purposely kept a mental distance between them and himself—to strengthen his mental resolve about committing self-immolation and using other children to test how to break the trackers when he knew it would upset Emma and Norman, and so that his death would hurt all his siblings less. He won’t be sacrificing himself needlessly anymore, as evidenced a short while later in chapter 43 where he reaffirms this vow to himself when being pursued by demons:)

(Source: Chapter 2 of the Mystic Code Book)

(Chapter 39: Emma and Ray grabbing Chris and Thoma respectively to protect them from their fall into the den of life-sucking plants, referenced in The Adventures of Ugo as the Snakes of Alvapinera.)

(Chapter 39: Alica and Yvette running to hug Emma and Jemima running to hug Gilda, happy that they’re all reunited and safe. Yvette later goes to Gilda for a second hug. Anna, Lanni, and Nat all move to comfort Thoma and reassure him they’re okay.)

(Chapter 39: Emma making a dive to save Alicia and Jemima from one of the plants.)

(Chapter 46/S2e02: I’m choosing the anime version because they made the correction of having the kids run to Emma and Ray for hugs. And after quickly getting his bearings, Ray smiles back at them?? S2 can have a few rights. The only one of the seven youngest escapees missing is Dominic. </3)

(Chapter 46: While Emma is going over what she learned from her late-night conversation with Sonju about the promise between two worlds with Anna, Don, Gilda and Nat—something important in its own right as it shows she trusts them and wants to keep them in the loop without worrying the younger kids yet—we see Ray watching over the younger children and specifically holding Rossi’s hand as they proceed on their journey.)

(Chapter 48: An absolutely iconic scene reinforcing everything that’s been stressed prior about relying on the people around you who care and that it’s better to share the burden rather than sacrifice yourself. The kids are angry because they love and care so much about their two oldest siblings. Look at Ray tenderly patting Jemima’s head while Mark and Dominic stare up at him with loving eyes. Ends on Sonju and Mujika saying the realest shit.)

(A bonus side comic from chapter 2 of the Mystic Code Book offering a bit more insight into Thoma and Lanni’s thoughts about Ray’s suicidal behaviors. All the escapees knew Ray intended to commit suicide from the point of whenever Norman’s note got to Emma and she brought them up to speed on the finalized plan because Anna cut her braids off and they had to hide away the stuff for the fake Ray corpse kit inconspicuously however many weeks ahead of time, but I’m still unsure how much they knew about his motivation and how much he truly, deep down in his bones believed he deserved to die in order to atone for what he did. Likewise, I still debate just how much of Ray’s speech Thoma and Lanni heard before they decided to knock on the dining hall door, but any rate they’re playing around with the sausage links while Emma’s slapping the lighter fluid off him in the background and yelling at him. They and Emma were the three present to see just how close he’d come to accomplishing his plan, and even if they didn’t know about how deep into despair he had sunk, it still hurt to see their older brother dowsed in gasoline, ready to die for the escape plan to succeed. Bless Shirai for including this.)

Again, far from exhaustive because I’m nearing the limit, but it’s a large part of what endears me to the trio and the series as a whole, and why I have the Big Bro Norman Tag, Big Bro Ray Tag, and Big Sis Emma Tag tags on my blog that I’m always looking to add more content to.

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serendipitous-magic · 3 years

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What is your writing advice for young people who want to write fanfiction and original stories in the near future?

If this is just Way Too Much, skip to the end (#16). My most important piece of advice is there. I also happen to think #5 is pretty good.

-_-_-_-

1) Literally just write. Write whatever you want, and do a lot of it.

_-_

2) You don’t have to post everything. In fact you don’t have to post anything. You can, don’t get me wrong, but it can be intimidating to sit down and think “I will now write something that other people will see and read and judge with their eyeballs.” Because that’s probably gonna lead to nerves and writer's block. Just write down the ideas that you have, the things you want to write, whatever’s in your brain that you want to explore and expand upon and make into something. And then if you want to, share it. Or don’t share it. I have plenty of half-baked ideas and documents and random story chapters and shit hidden away on my Google Drive that will never see the light of day, for a whole number of reasons. I wanted to write it but it wasn’t ~Spicy~ enough to warrant posting, or it’s only like an eighth of a good idea, or it’s like one scene with no story around it, or it’s just something incredibly self-indulgent I just wanted to write for my own enjoyment.

Point being, don’t write for other people. Don’t write so that other people can read it; write what you want, write for yourself, and then if you want to share it, do.

_-_

3) You can pretty much ignore any and all of these for fanfiction. In fact, you can ignore pretty much any rules or guidelines you want for fanfiction. Fanfic is a sandbox. You don’t have to be a “professional writer” to post fic. No one expects you to be Stephen King or Margaret Atwood. Fanfic is just for playing in a fandom and having fun. If you wanna write a 50 chapter slow burn with very little plot aside from the OTP slowly getting to know each other, and no real stakes or central conflict, I guarantee people would read that. Really, fanfiction is the Old West of writing: lawless, wild, unpredictable, and free.

However, here are the rules you must follow:

-Separate your paragraphs. (I’m sure you know this already, but I’m gonna say it anyway just in case.) Do not post one big block of text. Make a paragraph break when someone new is talking, when the characters are in a new place, when a new event occurs that changes the scene, when a chunk of time has passed, and when there’s a major change in subject.

-I know it’s obvious, but... grammar, punctuation, and capitalization. They exist to make writing easy for readers to read, and more people will read your stuff if they don’t have to stop and try to figure out what you meant.

-Use tags and labels, as is possible with whatever site you’re using. Especially if you include possibly triggering content in your story. Again, I know it’s obvious, but it’s common courtesy. Bonus: tagging the themes and content of your story helps readers find it and read it :)

-If possible, limit the use of all-caps and exclamation marks / question marks. 99% of the time, one ! or one ? will do. If you overload the page with a lot of all-caps and long rows of exclamation marks or question marks, it hampers readability.

... That’s literally all I can think of. And, like I said, it’s all pretty basic stuff. You were probably rolling your eyes like, “Uh, yeah, Gwen, I know.” But that’s literally it. You can pretty much do whatever you want in fanfic.

That being said, here’s my advice for both fanfiction and original work...

_-_

4) A quick and dirty rule for coming up with a plot, starting a story, keeping up pacing, or maintaining tension: figure out what dreams, desires, and goals are nearest and dearest to your main character’s heart (see #16). Then set up the main conflict to be directly in opposition to that goal. It doesn’t have to be in a tangible way, though it could be. But, if your main character wants more than anything to reach the ships on the southern coast of your world and sail to a new life, make sure the main conflict immediately prevents them from doing that - in fact, make sure to send them north. If your main character just wants to keep their loved ones safe, kidnap the loved ones. If your main character just wants to date their best-friend-turned-crush, make sure they think they have no chance - or, make them cocky about it, and make sure it makes Person B determined not to ever like them. You get it. Figure out what your character most wants, and then keep them from having that. Boom - your conflict now ties in with your character's motivation. It's like instant yeast for plots.

_-_

5) If you’re anything like me, you want your first draft to be Good, despite all that advice about how the first draft doesn’t have to be good and it’s just to get words on the page, yadda yadda. And if you’re somewhat of a perfectionist (like myself), it’s easy to get stuck looking at a blank page because you don’t have The Perfect Words, and you want what you write to be Good the first time.

Here’s how I cheat that:

Instead of trying to write a Good First Draft from a blank page, hit the enter key a few times, skip a little down on the page, change your ink to red (or blue, or whatever - just something immediately identifiable as Not Black) and just thought vomit. Write whatever the hell you’re thinking, exactly as you think it. Don’t worry about it being readable, don’t worry about narrative flow for now, don’t worry about covering all the details, don’t worry about anything except either a) getting all the details of your idea out onto the page, whether that’s a lot or whether it’s just a sentence or two, or b) if you don’t have an idea yet, finding your way there.

Because this method is also very good for finding your way to ideas when you’re stuck in writer’s block.

Because of how human brains work, getting this stuff out onto the page - in all its messy, stream-of-consciousness glory - will likely spark more thoughts. As you write your original idea about the scene, it’ll likely spark more ideas. Creation begets creation. If you just start thought-vomiting your ideas onto the page, chances are you’ll think of more things as you go, and you’ll start filling out description or dialogue or tone or action or whatever, and pretty soon the scene starts writing itself.

Not sure where you’re going with the scene or which ideas you wanna use? Use a lot of ambivalent language in your “thought-vomit draft.” My pre-writing notes are chock-full of the words “maybe,” “perhaps,” and the phrases, “At some point...” and “...or something like that.” In this way, I don’t tie myself down to one idea; it’s just an idea, and I’m keeping it on the page in case I use it, but I might chuck it in the trash or change it or whatever.

And then, once your ideas for the scene (or story, or chapter, or whatever) are on the page, then go back to the top and start translating them into a “real” first draft. Use black ink, and start copy-pasting chunks of the thought-vomit up into the top part of the document and translating them into Draft 1. Separate out paragraphs where paragraph breaks should be. Add the correct punctuation and whatnot. Change “describe the lobby here - include potted plants, fancy carpet, blood stain, etc.” into an actual description of the lobby. Flesh it out, or condense, or whatever it needs. And if you’re still stuck, change back to red ink and ramble some more until you find a path that feels right, then plug that in. This keeps you from looking at a blank page, and it allows you to generate a kind of Draft 0.5, somewhere between a plan and a first draft.

You don’t have to use every idea. Like I said, jot down whatever comes to mind, put a “maybe” before or after it, and keep working. If the idea grabs you and you wanna keep expanding on it and exploring it, cool. If you just wanna jot it down so you don’t forget it and then move on, also cool. Red-ink draft / “thought-vomit draft” is your time to jump around in the timeline, add or finesse details at whatever point your brain moves to, etc. Don’t try to do it exactly in story order, because you will get tangential thoughts and ideas, and you will not remember to write them down five pages later when you finally get to taking notes on that scene. Trust me. On that note...

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6) Write everything down the moment you think of it. Seriously.

“I’ll remember it when I get around to writing that scene in a couple days / weeks / months (/years).”

You won’t.

Write it down.

Phone, journal, google docs - hell, my family regularly laughs at me for grabbing a napkin during dinner and scribbling thoughts down alongside pasta sauce stains.

And then, once you have it written down somewhere...

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7) Consolidate your writing ideas in one place.

Maybe this isn’t really your style, and that’s totally chill.

Buuuut, if you’re Type-A like me - or if you tend to be somewhat unorganized and you know you’ll lose track of your writing notes if they’re scattered across multiple notebooks, journals, napkins, phone notes, etc. - having one consolidated document of notes is a life saver. I keep mine on Google Docs so I can access it, add to it, and look through it for inspiration anywhere at any time. When I have one of those Shower Thoughts that I jot down on my phone or on a napkin during dinner, I set myself a reminder on my phone to type it up in my Story Ideas document later.

(Or, if the idea I had was for a story of mine that I’ve already started planning / drafting / whatever, I put it in the document for that story instead of the Big Random Story Ideas doc. You get it.)

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8) Have other ways to collect and save writing ideas, besides just writing stuff down. If you like Pinterest, make pinterest boards of your characters or stories or settings or whatever. If you’re big into playlists, make a playlist for your character / setting / story / etc. Or both. Or something else. I’m not good at drawing, but maybe you are, and maybe you like to draw your ideas. Whatever form it takes, having another way to save ideas and think about your stories is invaluable.

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9) Some writers can just start writing with no idea where the story is going, and they just kind of figure it out as they go. I envy those writers. And I do that sometimes for fanfiction, where the stakes are somewhat lower and the audience is reading more for scene-to-scene enjoyment (and to see their OTP kiss) than for a Driving And Compelling Narrative.

But here’s the thing: especially if you’re just kind of starting out, writing without some sort of plan is really, really hard, and will likely lead you into a slow, meandering narrative that will likely frustrate you.

Even if you think you’re someone that just can’t write with a plan (and again, I have the highest respect for pansters out there - I don’t know how you do it, you crazy bastards, but you keep doing you) - even if you think “I can’t work with plans, they’re too prescriptive, I just want to write and see what happens -”

Try at least making the most skeletal of plans.

Even if you have no clue what 90% of the story is, yet. That’s fine. But you need to have some idea of what you’re building to, even if that’s nothing more specific than a feeling, or a turning point for your character. Even if your entire plan for everything beyond Chapter 1 is, “At some point, Charlie needs to realize that Ed was lying to her.”

This is where those Draft 0.5 notes come in handy. Because, more than likely, working on your current scene that way will spark ideas for later scenes, which you can put down at the bottom of the document and save for when they become relevant. In my experience, the line between planning ahead and making a Draft 0.5 is exceptionally thin. One can quickly turn into the other.

If you’re really, really resistant to the idea of planning ahead, that’s okay. It’s not everybody’s style. But for the love of all that is holy, write down your ideas for future scenes, even if you’re a person that doesn’t like to plan and writes only in story order, because you will not remember that idea once you get to that scene.

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10) You don’t have to write in order.

Here’s the thing: I’m a person that can only do my Draft 1 in story order (meaning, chronological order). I just have to be in that flow; I need to write in story order for me to best channel where the character is at from scene to scene, both narratively and emotionally.

But my Thought Vomit Draft is another thing entirely. By using the brain hack of putting my notes in red (or another color, it doesn’t matter) and going down to the bottom of the document / page and taking notes there, and then integrating them into whatever plan I have, and then translating them into Draft 1 once I get there in the story - by doing that, I can get my good ideas onto the page (and expound upon them and let my muse carry me and ride that momentum while I’m in the moment of inspiration) without writing out of order.

Maybe that’s just me. But if you’re a person who really prefers to write in story order, that could be hugely helpful to you. It is to me.

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11) Emotion and motivation will do more for your story than technicalities of plot.

If your characters really care about something, and their journey through the (shaky or weak) plot is emotionally engaging, it will be a much more compelling story than a story with a “perfect” plot and unrelatable or unmotivated characters.

If your characters care about what they’re doing, and it means something to them, and their goals and actions are driven by dreams or fears or emotions that are integral to who they are, your audience will care too. If you have a perfectly crafted plot that hits all the right beats and has high stakes and fast pacing and drama - but your characters don’t connect with what’s happening in a way that’s deeply meaningful or emotional for them? You’re gonna have a hard time engaging readers.

When in doubt, prioritize character emotion and motivation over plot. Emotion is what drives story.

This power is highly exploitable. (Just look at pulp novels and shitty but entertaining movies.) You can even use it to glaze over plot holes or reinvigorate a limp narrative. Use it that way sparingly, though. It’s a band-aid, not a surgery.

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12) Evil villains are hard to write - mostly because there are very few truly evil people in the world. (There are a few. Billionaires and several big name politicians come to mind.) But by and large, there aren’t that many evil people. There are plenty of bad people, but bad people have some good in them, somewhere in there. Trying to write an evil villain is hard, because they often turn very cartoony.

Here’s a tip: it’s much easier to write antagonists who aren’t evil. Even if they’re bad people. Of course, there’s no reason you can’t write a villain that’s just truly evil - a serial killer, or an abuser, or a billionaire, or someone who legit just wants to hurt people or blow up the earth or stay in control of an oppressed population, or whatever. But chances are, it’s gonna be really hard to make them feel real, and even harder to create a plot around them that doesn’t feel forced or contrived.

Instead, try writing an antagonist / villain whose motivations and goals directly clash with your protagonist’s - but not because they want to take over the world or see people suffer. Write an antagonist who’s chaotic good, but whose perception of the situation is completely opposite from your hero’s. Write an antagonist whose only desire is to save people, and who will do anything to achieve that goal - anything. Write an antagonist who believes in the letter of the law, and will hinder and oppose the hero’s methods even if they agree with the hero’s motivation. Write an antagonist who got in way over their head and did some things they regret, and now they don’t know how to get out, and they’re doing their best but whatever they set in motion is too powerful for them to stop now.

Write villains who are human. Write a killer who thought they were doing the right thing by taking their victim out of the equation, who vomits at the sight of the body and sobs over the grave they dig. Write a government leader who truly believes she’s doing what’s best for her people in the long-term, even if it might hurt them in the short term, and is willing to endure the hatred and belligerence of the masses if it means securing what she thinks is a better future for her people. Write a teenage bully that thinks they’re the one being picked on by the world, and they’re just fighting back, standing their ground. Write a scientist who will break any code of ethics and hurt anyone he needs to - in order to bring back his baby sister from the grave, because he promised her he’d protect her and he failed. Write an antagonist who is selfish and self-centered and capricious - because in order to survive they had to look out for Number One, and that habit ain’t about to break anytime soon.

Write villains who aren’t even villains. Write antagonists who oppose the hero because of moral differences. Write antagonists who are trying to do the right thing. Write antagonists who treat the heroes with kindness and dignity and respect and gentleness.

They don’t have to be good. They don’t have to be Misunderstood Sweethearts who “deserve” a redemption arc. They can be cruel and nasty and dismissive and callous and violent and etc. etc.

Just hesitate before you make them Evil-with-a-capital-E. Because evil is hard to write, and honestly, boring to read. Flawed human beings with goals and motivations that directly oppose the main characters’ are much easier to write and much more interesting to read.

Ask why. Why is your villain trying to take over the world? What does that even mean? Are they trying to create a Star-Trek-like post-capitalism utopia, but they know that won’t happen in a million lifetimes, so they’re trying to do it by force? Are they actually super in favor of human rights, but they got very impatient waiting for the world to do anything about poverty and war, so they decided to take it into their own hands? Are they determined to fix the world - no matter the cost? Are they terrified and overwhelmed, but committed to see it through to the end? Or - maybe they’re just doing it on a dare. Maybe they don’t really give a shit about world domination, they were just a mediocre rich white guy who decided to fuck around and find out, and now he’s kind of curious how far he can take this thing. And now he’s kind of an internationally-wanted criminal, so he’s kind of stuck living on his hidden private island in his multi-billion dollar secret base, strapping lasers to sharks’ heads for the hell of it. Gross, selfish, uncaring, and dangerous? For sure. Evil? Depends on your definition. See, now we’re getting somewhere.

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13) It’s tempting to let the plot control the characters. It’s easy to drop your characters into a situation and see how they react. But here’s the thing: that doesn’t drive plot. In fact, it bogs down pacing. Instead, try to build you plot off of your characters’ actions and decisions. Let your character build their own situation. Not to say it should go they way they wanted it to go; in fact, usually, their grand plans should go to hell very quickly. But having the characters take action and make decisions, and letting the plot develop based on that, is much easier to make compelling than making a rigid series of events and then trying to herd your characters into them.

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14) Having trouble justifying a character’s actions? Consider having them make the opposite decision, or having them approach the situation in a different way. For example: you need your character to go meet the bad guy, for plot reasons, even though there’s no way it’s not a trap. If the character goes, readers are gonna be groaning with their head in their hands, because c’mon man, that was really fucking stupid. But he’s gotta go, because the plot needs that. Two ways you might handle this: a) He knows it’s probably a trap. He decides not to go. The plot conspires to get him near the villain anyway. Or, b) He knows it’s a trap. But he needs to go, for (insert reasons here). So, he approaches it in an unexpected way. He brings backup, recruiting a side character we met earlier in the story. Or he arrives on the back of a dragon, because ain’t nobody gonna fuck with a dude on a dragon. Or he goes - early, and ambushes the villain. It may work, it may not. He may get himself kidnapped anyway. But it moves the plot along without having Stupid Hero Syndrome.

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15) This is a legit piece of advice: if all of this sounds overwhelming, literally just ignore it and write what you want. For real. Writing should be fun, and every single writer operates differently. If you’re sitting here like “I’m getting stressed just reading this,” just flip me a good-natured bird and get on with your life. I promise I won’t take it personally. Same goes for literally any other writing advice you see. Lots of rules and guidelines can very quickly make anything thoroughly un-fun. Just write. If you’re passionate about it and you do it for long enough, you’ll start figuring out the tips and tricks on your own.

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16) Here’s the best piece of advice I can give you: know your characters. More importantly, know what’s important to them. Build their personality and decisions off of that, and build your plot off of their decisions.

I see a lot of character building sheets that ask a shit-ton of questions like “What’s their most prized possession?” “Do they like their family?” “What’s their favorite food?”

And while these are good questions, my problem with this type of character building is that if you start there, with the little stuff, you’re building on nothing. IMO, to make a truly strong character (not strong like Inner Strength, strong like effective), you need a strong foundation.

Here are the things you must know about your character:

a) What are their greatest fears / deepest insecurities? And I don’t mean “wasps” or “heights.” I mean the deep shit. I mean fears like “living a meaningless life,” or “turning out just like their parents,” or “that no one will ever love them,” or “being powerless.” You may say, “But they’re really scared of wasps! They fall into a wasp nest when they were little and got stung so much they almost died!” Great! That’s a fantastic bit of backstory. They should absolutely be afraid of wasps, and that should absolutely be an impediment later in the story. But dig deeper. What about that event actually scarred them? Was it the helplessness? Stumbling around, swatting at the air, not being able to do a single thing to stop what was happening to them? Was it that they were alone, and no matter how loud they screamed, no one was coming? Was it the bodily horror of feeling themself turn into an inhuman creature as they swelled up from the stings, unable to move their fingers or face normally anymore?

And don’t forget insecurities, because those factor in, too. Are they deeply insecure about their identity? Do they believe, deep down, that they’re ugly? Did they grow up poor and they’ve always been really touchy about that? Why? Dig deep. Figure out what really, really bothers them.

b) What are their hopes and dreams? What do they truly want out of life? What do they consider the most valuable to their experience here in this thing called life? Is it the freedom to forge their own path and be independent? Is it the approval of their family or peers? Is it a home? Is it knowledge, or understanding? Spiritual fulfillment? Is it deeply important to them that they contribute to their community, or protect those they love? What do they need in order to feel truly and deeply fulfilled in life?

Figure out those two things (each one encompasses several things, btw, you don’t have to stop at just one for each), and then use that to inform how they behave and the types of decisions they make within the story.

It also informs character behavior and personality.

Let’s say we have a character who’s afraid of helplessness. They’re probably gonna be the person that always wants to do something, try something, no matter how hopeless the situation seems. They’d despise just sitting and waiting, probably, because it makes them feel powerless. They might even be the person that makes rash decisions and acts impulsively and puts themself in danger unnecessarily, because in their mind it’s better than being at the mercy of fate. This is one way you could use a character’s personality to inform their decisions, which in turn helps to inform plot.

Or, let’s say we have a character whose greatest fear is being left behind or forgotten. We may have a chatterbox on our hands. They might be obnoxious. They might love the spotlight, constantly vying for attention no matter the situation, because deep down they’re so afraid that they’d be forgotten otherwise. Or, it may go the opposite way. They may be so afraid of people leaving them that they’re terrified of bothering people. They don’t want to do anything that could annoy people, anything that might give people a reason to leave them. They might be exceedingly polite, quiet, accommodating. A push-over, really.

These are two nearly opposite types of personalities, both stemming from the same core fear/insecurity. You can go a lot of different ways with it. But if you build on that strong foundation, you’ll have a strong character, and a stronger plot.

Likewise, the structure of your story can and should inform the design of these character traits. If you need your characters to team up near the end, it may be impactful if you give your main character a deep fear of commitment, an insecurity about being unwanted or left behind, and make them highly value independence and freedom. That could make their team-up for the final battle very meaningful. Conversely, you can use your character’s deepest fears and desires to help design the plot. Is your character deeply insecure about voicing their opinions or taking a stand, because of trauma they faced in the past? Make them face that. Build that into the climactic third act. Give them the big inspirational speech where they stand up and talk about what they believe to be important, what they think the group should do. And then design that character arc to run through the story, giving you more handholds and stepping stones, more pieces of foundation on which to design the plot.

In this way, character should inform story as much as story informs character. It’s a feedback loop.

Bonus: if you build your character and your plot off of each other in this way, it automatically starts to build in the foundations of that emotional investment I mentioned earlier. If your character’s decisions are based on what they most want and do not want in life, you basically have your character motivation and stakes pre-built.

Note: you need to know these things about your villain, too.

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I’m genuinely sorry about the length of this, lmao. But you did ask.

Best of luck!

Edit: I forgot an important one:

17) Start when the scene starts and end when the scene ends.

What do I mean by that?

If your notes say “Danny asks Nicole out after school and majorly flubs it,” start the scene when Danny approaches Nicole after school. Better yet, cold-open the scene on “I was wondering if, you know, you’d wanna. You know. Hang out some time?”

Don’t start that morning when Danny goes to school, unless you’re gonna cover the school day in like one or two sentences. Don’t spend whole paragraphs going through the school day, unless it’s to cover other plot points first (in which case apply these same guidelines there), or if the paragraphs are there for a specific reason, like to illustrate how stressed he is and how it seems like every little thing is going wrong. Even then, trim the fat as much as possible. Expounding and describing everything Moment-to-moment is for the meat of the scenes, not the leading-up-to and coming-away-from.

Here’s my rule of thumb: study how and when movies cut from scene to scene. Movies have exceptionally strict, limited time for storytelling; they’re excellent examples of starting a scene when the plot point starts and ending when it’s over. If you can’t picture a movie showing everything you showed, start the scene later and end it earlier.

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