#also i'm still in school she's letting us be on our phones if we finish early so >:)

[endless-summer-soldier]

dr. feelgood - chapter one

pairing: Surgeon!Bucky x SurgicalIntern!Reader

summary: Y/N has a one night stand with a handsome stranger the night before starting her new job as a surgical intern. Little does she know, the handsome stranger also happens to be her new boss

warnings: must be 18+, drinking, some surgery descriptions, smut, self-pleasure, praise kink, very minor character death

word count: 1.2k

series playlist: here (I'm still finalizing this so it might change)

taglist: @sebsgirl71479 @ozwriterchick @notmeddy (message me to be added!)

series masterlist

There was a stranger in my bed. A very handsome, naked stranger, but a stranger nonetheless. I rolled onto my back and tried to piece together the events from last night, but all I could remember was tequila. Too much tequila.

I crawled out of bed and headed for the shower, hoping the stranger would sneak out while I was in the bathroom. Today was a big day and being hungover was not part of my plan. I chugged some water and took a few Advil before I rinsed all of last night off my body.

When I walked back into my bedroom, Handsome Stranger was still in bed, but he was awake, which was progress.

“You forgot to invite me into the shower with you,” he said, sitting up in my bed. I gave him a small smile and said, “Let’s not do this. Last night was really fun, but I need you to leave.”

“Kicking me out already? No breakfast? No morning sex?” 

“I’m starting a new job this morning and I really need to get ready,” I said. I grabbed the stranger’s clothes from the floor and tossed them at him.

“Wow, you really are kicking me out. This is going to impact your rating in my little black book.”

“Do you even remember my name?” I asked.

“Is it Lindsey? You look like a Lindsey.”

I chuckled, “It’s not Lindsey.”

“Okay, well I may not remember your name but I do remember the mind-blowing sex we had last night.”

“Can’t argue with you there.” I walked over towards him wrapped only in my towel and held my hand out, “Y/N”

“Bucky,” he took my hand and gave it a solid squeeze before letting go.

“Look Bucky, I’m sure you’re really great but I can’t do this right now. I have to focus on my career. Yes, I had a great time last night, but this can’t happen again. So I really do need you to go.”

He held both hands up in surrender, “Fair enough, I appreciate the honesty. I will get out of your hair.” He took his clothes from the heap on the bed and started putting them back on. I retreated back to the bathroom to dry my hair and brush my teeth. I let Bucky collect his things and leave without another word, avoiding any further awkward conversation.

I finished getting ready and could swear I smelled coffee, likely just my brain tricking me. When I departed down the stairs I heard the coffee maker brewing and froze, knowing I didn’t start the machine. There was a note scribbled on the white board attached to my fridge that read:

Good luck on your first day. Coffee’s on me :) - B

“Son of a bitch,” I muttered to myself. At least he didn’t leave his phone number because I might’ve been tempted to text him. A new guy was the last thing I needed right now. So I poured myself a travel mug full of coffee and departed for the hospital.

It was strange to be dressed in periwinkle scrubs and a lab coat. All through medical school, I dreamed of this moment, when I would finally be a surgeon. And yet, putting on the scrubs felt wildly underwhelming.

I stood in a group with my fellow interns as our resident, Dr. Palmer gave us a tour of the hospital and a run down of our basic expectations. I exchanged glances with a few of the interns in my group, but we didn’t have an opportunity to talk much.

The first day was fairly routine. We each had a chance to present on a patient and answer questions that Palmer asked us. The cases were all fairly routine which was a relief. Then we were sent off to the ER to complete basic examinations, take blood, and sew sutures. They were easing us in, which was a relief since I was still a little hungover, but I knew in the coming weeks we would be exposed to more and more.

Dr. Palmer introduced us to Dr. Stephen Strange, who was a world renowned neurosurgeon and apparently Palmer’s fiance. It wasn’t uncommon for doctors to be involved with fellow doctors because our work schedules were so demanding. Strange was curt and arrogant, but clearly highly intelligent and it would be a great experience to work underneath him. But I was most eager to meet the Head of Trauma, Dr. James Barnes. I’d read a lot of his articles and respected his resourcefulness as a former doctor for the Army. He had the kind of experience that couldn’t be taught in a hospital and I wanted to soak up as much of his knowledge as he was willing to give.

About halfway through the 12-hour shift, I found my way to the break room for a cup of coffee. The coffee pot was steaming which was fortunate because it meant a fresh pot had just been brewed. I poured myself a generous cup and added just a splash of cream. 

As I took my first sip, a voice called from behind me, “Not as good as tequila, but it works wonders.” 

I spun around and found handsome stranger smirking at me, clad in navy scrubs and a white lab coat. 

I’m sure my jaw was on the floor, but I did my best to cover up my shock, “What are you doing here?”

He walked over toward me and poured himself a cup of coffee, “I could ask you the same thing. Was my coffee this morning so good that you had to come here for more?”

I was too stunned to respond to his sarcasm, “I’m sorry, do you work here?”

He looked at me patronizingly. “What does it look like?” He held his arms out, drawing my attention to his scrubs.

This couldn’t be real. I was about to pinch myself to test out my pain receptors when I caught a whiff of him. Ginger, bergamot, and citrus. The same heavenly scent that I had inhaled when I made my bed this morning.

 “So this is the new job, huh?” he asked me. I couldn’t even formulate a response but he didn’t miss a beat, “Very impressive, truly. This is one of the best programs in the country.” I simply nodded, trying to calculate the quickest way out of this conversation.

Luckily I was saved by my resident. Dr. Palmer entered the break room and interrupted the conversation.

“Dr. Barnes, I see you’ve met one of my interns.”

My heart dropped into my stomach. Handsome stranger was Dr. Barnes. The Dr. James Barnes who I’ve admired for years and was incredibly excited to work with. And I drunkenly slept with him last night without even knowing who he was. I could feel my career slipping through my fingers.

“Yes, I was just about to introduce myself,” he stated. He extended a hand to me, “Dr. James Barnes, Head of Trauma.”

“Dr. Barnes, pleasure to meet you,” I faked enthusiasm. “I’m Dr. Y/F/N Y/L/N.”

“Dr. Y/L/N actually has a special interest in trauma, if I remember correctly,” Palmer added. 

“Is that so?” Barnes said, looking at me with amusement. I merely nodded with a smile and he said, “Well, it sounds like we’ll be seeing a lot of each other. If you’ll excuse me, I have to scrub into the OR in about 30 minutes.”  

He walked out of the break room but then popped his head back in, “Looking forward to working with you Dr. Y/L/N.” I could see Dr. Palmer trying to piece together the interaction so I scurried out of the room before she could question me.

next chapter

[wjhik]

Maybe We Were a Bit Too Loud.. (Jude Bellingham) *Smut*

A/N: been a bit too many Jude stories. if yall have any trent requests pls send

Y/N's POV:

Jude and I have both been so occupied in our work, we have barely got any time to spend with our daughter, let alone ourselves. Kiera had a play at school, so I got off work early. Unfortunately, Jude couldn't make it. She was quite upset about it, but I made sure to make it up to her. We had a girls day. We went to the Salon and got our nails done. I needed a refill on my nails and she wanted to get some color for her birthday party in a few days. I also got her some ice cream and had a shopping spree.

"Mama! Mama! Mama!" Kiera yells. She really doesn't have to be so loud. I'm right next to her. It has been a long day. As fun as it was, it was fucking exhausting. I look at her and she shows me some toy that she has, explaining it as if I didn't buy it for her. "Honey, that's amazing." I play into her excitement. "Mum, I'm hungry." She tells me, abruptly dropping her toy. "Let's get you some food, my little hungry bunny." I say, scooping her up and kissing her tummy. She starts wriggling in a fit of ticklish laughter.

I finish making spaghetti Bolognese as per my hungry bunny's request. She's just like her father. I take out her Minnie Mouse plate from the kitchen cabinet and give her some pasta. I also pair it with some leftover mashed potato and some freshly steamed broccoli and carrots. "Mama! I don't like carrots!" Kiera yells, very politely. "I know, sweetheart, but if you don't want to end up with glasses like mama, you have to have them." I tell her. She's not a picky eater, unlike me, but carrots are her weakness. It's not fun waking up to see a blurry husband, and if she wants to escape my genetic curse of poor eyesight, she has to eat her carrot. "Hmph. Fine." She says, crossing her arms but still listening to me. She's such a blessing.

As I'm serving myself the spaghetti and the vegetables (purely to be a good roll model to my daughter) for myself, I hear the door lock rattling. I look up to see my husband walk through the door. "Daddy!!" Kiera yells, attempting to get off of our high counter chairs. Jude quickly walks to his carbon copy and picks her up. "Hello, my love." He says, littering her face with kisses and placing her back on her chair. She continues munching away at her veggies. "Mhh...Whatever you made smells amazing." He says, walking to the back of the counter, where I place my plate onto the table and get out his plate. "Spaghetti Bolognese." I tell him. He grabs me by the waist and places a kiss on my head. "Missed ya." He says, then placing a kiss on my lips. "Missed you too." I reply. "Ewwww." We hear a little voice say. Our little love session is interrupted by Kiera fake gagging. She learns too much from Jobe. "Alright, alright. Go sit down, love." I tell Jude. He sits down and I place his food in front of him. He quickly gobbles it up.

"Mama, can we watch bluey?" Kiera asks. "No, honey. It's mama's turn to choose." Jude says. Kiera is sat on her little pink blanket at the left in of our very large L-shaped white couch. Jude and I are sitting on the right side. "But, daddy-" She argues back. "No 'but's." Jude says sternly. "You got your turn yesterday, and I was before you. Mama's last few turns were taken by us, too. It's time we let her choose." He explains to our daughter. She lets out a huff and puff. "Jude, it's not that serious. Let her watch. I'm pretty tired anyways." I whisper to Jude a bit too loud. "Yay! Thank you, mama!" She says, taking the remote from Jude and playing her show. "Baby, you can't give in." Jude begins a lecture. "Hey, don't tell me. You're the one who spoils her." I tell him. I'm supposed to be the strict parent, not him.

Jude put's his arm over my shoulders after the 76th episode of these stupid Australian dogs. I would go to bed, but this is the only family time we've had in weeks. I reach for my phone to check when bedtime will roll around. I let out a sigh as I realize tomorrow is a weekend, therefor she can sleep in. Jude senses my frustration and pulls me in deeper. Kiera's trance is broken when she looks over to see her parents at peace. She immediately stands up on the couch makes the strut towards us. She decides to sit right in between Jude and I, of course cuddling him and giving me her back. Jude and I's cuddle session was cut way too short.

My head moves from it’s comfortable position on the back of the couch to look at where the little snores are coming from. I see our little monkey finally asleep after 3 long hours of Australian dogs. I pat Jude's arm and he, in response, picks her up and starts walking towards the stairs. I clean up some of the cups, snacks, and toys left on the coffee table and quickly follow Jude's path. I close the baby gate at the top of the stairs Jude installed when Kiera starting crawling and head towards Keira's bedroom. I creak the door open to see Jude putting her into bed. He firmly tucks her into bed and places her pink bunny next to her. On his way out, he turns on her moon-shaped nightlight, as she's afraid of the dark, and shuts the door behind him.

Jude backs out of the room, still facing his daughter. He turns around and gets slightly startled by me standing directly behind him. "Fuck, baby. You scared me. I didn't know you were there." He says putting his hand on his own chest. "I'm sorry." I tell him, nuzzling myself into his chest. I haven't been able to feel Jude without another little lady jumping on him. Jude places his hand on the back of my head and pushes me further into him. "Let's get you to bed, pretty lady." He grabs my hand and leads me to our shared bedroom.

"Where are you going? You've already done all your bathroom shit." He tells me as I throw the blanket off myself. "Mama's going to go change into some PJs. She doesn't feel like being caught in a bra and panties when Keira decides to love bomb you tomorrow morning." Did I just say that? "Mama's gonna do what?" Jude makes fun of my use of 'mom language'. "See what this damn kid is doing to me?" I tell him, walking into our walk-in closet. I walk into my side of our closet. I open the drawer of 'sexy' underwear I have. it's basically has cobwebs on it. I pick out Jude's formerly favorite white set. I look at myself in the mirror, feeling better about myself than the last time I put it on.

Jude took me to a fancy hotel a few weeks after Keira was born to give me a break. I decided to bring along this set to 'impress' him. I was freshly postpartum, and I felt very insecure. I haven't put it on since then, but I've been working hard to get my prepartum body back. Obviously, I don't look the same as young, active, 20-year-old Y/N Jude met, but I would say I look pretty darn okay. I quickly slip on a silky robe, coming right under my arse. I tie it in a way where it cinches my waist and leaving the front open enough to give Jude a peak of his former bestie.

Jude is sat up on his side of the bed, book in hand. (Jude 110% does not read before but, but dad!jude does) I walk over to my side of the bed, taking an excessive amount of time in hopes that Jude will notice me. "Hey, baby? I was wondering if- Whoa." He says, taking his eyes away from his book. "Whoa?" I say, pretending to be clueless. Jude quickly puts his book on the side table and pushes the blanket off of his lap. He gets up and walks towards me. I open my arms for him to come into. He grabs my waist and I wrap my arms around his neck. "You look amazing, love." He tells me, leaning in to kiss my neck. He starts licking and sucking on the sensitive spot behind my ear. "Jude..." I moan, throwing my head back. Jude leaves my neck and puts his hands right where my robe ends. He effortlessly lifts me up.

He goes back to kissing me as he walks us over to the bed. He places me in the middle of it. He undoes my robe and kisses me from my neck down to my stomach. He leaves a few bites and marks on my stomach. He works his way down to my panties and slowly takes them off. He starts to lick and suck on my clit. He slowly works his way up to using 3 fingers inside me. I'm moaning and whining with my hands in his hair. "Fuck, Jude. That feels so good!" I moan out, grabbing his hair even tighter. Normally, he would talk a lot during sex, but he's so focus on me and making me feel good that he can't be bothered to dirty talk.

"Fuck, baby. Just like that. Ride me like that. Taking me so well." He says, pushing my hips back and forth. He has my robe open up top, but tied up. I ended up getting too cold, but we were too eager to stop to change the temperature, so I put on the robe again. I have my hands on his chest, using him as leverage to keep me moving. I feel my legs give out, and Jude senses it. He grabs me and flips me onto the bed. He quickly gives me a passionate kiss and pulls out of me. "Turn over, baby. On your belly." He tells me. I quickly obey, too horny to resist. I get on my hands and knees. Jude pushes his dick back in and thrusts into me at an ungodly pace. The headboard is slamming against our wall, and I'm making some very loud and lewd noises. Jude reaches up to my head and grabs a handful of my long hair. He wraps it around his hand and uses it to pull my head back. He uses this to kiss my neck, leaving even more marks than before. He pulls me off my hands and makes me grab the headboard. He wraps his unused hand around my throat and squeezes lightly. "You like that, baby? Like the way I'm fucking you?" Jude grunts into my ear. "Yes, baby. Fuck, you fuck me so good!" I moan out. I can feel a knot start to go undone in my stomach. "Baby, I'm gonna-" I tell him, reaching back to put my hands in his hair. "I know, sweetie. Cum for me. Cum around me, my love." As I hear that, I quickly let my orgasm wash over me, Jude following close behind me, filling me up with his warm cum.

"That was amazing." He tells me, kissing my sweaty forehead. Jude had cleaned me and himself up and gotten us some very fancy champagne from our wine cellar. "I know. I'm glad we got some time alone, finally." I tell him, looking up to kiss his lips. It's been way too long since Jude and I got freaky. It's hard to find the time when you're raising the clingiest child of all time. Jude takes a sip of his sparkly drink and turns on the electronic fireplace. It's mainly ambience, but it's nice to have. He turns off the two nightlights and gets comfy. Him and I drink and talk the night away, until we both cave to our parental positions and fall asleep with a show in the background.

(Time skip)

I open my eyes to see a blurry world. I reach over to the side table where I fumble until I find my glasses. I put them on and turn to face my husband. Somewhere along the night, he turned off the T.V. and tucked us into bed, taking off my glasses and placing them on my side table. On the rare occasion where I get to see him, he looks so beautiful in the mornings. I snuggle into him and kiss his forehead. I nuzzle into him and close my eyes once again, enjoying the quite morning. No rush. No Keira. This is nice. I feel Jude stirring slightly. He knows I'm awake as I have my glasses on. He places a kiss on my lips as I kiss him back. "Good morning." I tell him, giddy as ever. It's like it's our first night together at his mum's place again. "Good morning, love." He says in his raspy morning voice. Him and I chat a little before hearing a door creak open. I look over Jude's shoulder to see Kiera standing there with her bunny in her hands, her hair wild as ever.

"Can I come in?" She asks, rubbing her eyes. I quickly but discreetly slip on my panties that were discarded the night before. "Of course, love." Jude says, opening his arms to his baby girl. He places her in the middle of us, and for once she chooses to cuddle me and not Jude. I accept her cuddles with open arms and pull her in closer. "I like this. It's soft." She tells me, rubbing over my robe. Jude lets out a laugh and kisses the back of her head. He slings his arm over the two of us and pulls us into him.

"Daddy? I have a question." She asks her father who has his head on the pillow and his eyes closed. He lets out a 'hmm?' while keeping his eyes closed. "Are you nice to mama?" Jude and and I are both shocked by the question. "Of course he is, baby. Why are you asking?" I ask her. "I heard some banging on the wall yesterday and you yelling." She tells us, now sitting up. Jude and I both mentally face palm. I look at him, expecting an answer just to see him looking at me the same way. "Sweety, mama and I were just playing. She's fine." Jude explains to her. "But you said that you shouldn't play in a way where people get hurt." She says crossing her arms, visibly upset with her daddy. "Baby, I wasn't hurt." I tell her, rubbing her arm. "Then, why were you yelling?" She asks. "Umm..." I look over to Jude for an answer once again, but he is looking around the room, playing dumb. Amazing. "You know how you start yelling when your daddy tickles you? Like that." I come up with an excuse. "Oh. Daddy tickled you for a long time then." Jude starts snickering and I simply nod. Keira nods, satisfied with the answer. Jude tells her to go use the toilet and brush her teeth. She gets up and marches out of the room.

"So, can I tickle you again?"

Wattpad: funkyfishfeet

DM for requests

[dollediary]

He's Yours, But Am I?

pairings❥ jake x fem!reader

point of view❥ 3rd person

warnings❥ mentions of sex, body issues, dieting, signs of pregnancy, abandonment, slight verbal abuse, manipulation, unprotected sex

word count❥ 20.6k

genre❥ angst, smut

synopsis❥ falling in love with your friends with benefits is a difficult burden to carry. not using protection to feel closer to each other was fun until you missed your period, so what happens when your pregnancy test results come back positive? to you, it had been a dream come true; you knew you had to break the news to him eventually, and maybe you could finally confess your feelings to him. when you do finally tell him the news he tells you he isn't ready to be a father, requesting you to stop seeing each other. falling in love with your friends with benefits is a difficult burden to carry, but it in no way compares to being in love with your friends with benefits and having his child to carry.

note: i apologize for the absence. i was so emotionally invested in writing this story, so i just kinda lacked the motivation to wrote anything else. can't promise all of your previous requests will be fulfilled, but i'll do my best! please like, reblog, and interact as much as possible! it will help me get motivation to finish more stories and grant more requests. i'm super proud of this work, i think i'll do 3rd person from now on. i hope you all enjoy, let me know how you all like it!

"do you think i'm getting fat?" y/n asks her friend, chaewon, as she pinches her stomach, the almost unnoticeable weight gain making her frown at herself while she stood sideways in the mirror. chaewon frowns as she watched from the bed, she noticed y/n had been losing her glow ever since july ended, but she attributed it to their sophomore year in college that would be starting up again in weeks' time. y/n always lost her glow whenever school started back up.

"a little," chaewon replied honestly. "but that's normal! we've been eating well these days; it could just be a bloat, you know?" y/n thought about it for a second and nodded. that may have been the reason she's also been nauseous lately, too, having eaten more than her body could handle in the name of enjoying her summer break more. chaewon takes note of y/n's thoughtful silence, adding onto her statement, "we can always go to my pilates and yoga classes to change it back to normal if you want..?"

"maybe, i'm gonna wait a few days to see if it'll go down on its own first," y/n sighed, giving her reflection one last glance as she unfolded and pulled her oversized shirt down again, meeting chaewon on the bed with a jump and loud thud as she stared at the ceiling. chaewon only stared forward, continuing to watch tv as they stayed in a comfortable silence.

"you talk to hyunjin lately?" y/n asks chaewon, breaking the silence. chaewon only shrugs her shoulders in response.

"eh. how about you and jake?"

"we've been seeing each other in person more, and he's becoming more of a caller than a texter these days," she explains to which chaewon only responds with a hum of understanding.

"hyunjin and i are the kind who don't need to talk to each other everyday for our bond to be as strong as it is. when we're together, it's like he never left," the smile on chaewon's face awakens something in y/n: lovesickness. she pouts, but it's more of a pout of envy than jealousy, because she could never be jealous of her best friend.

"i wish i could relate," she groaned, turning to lay on her stomach as she receives a facetime call from jake. picking up the phone, she fights back a smile by biting the inside of her cheek. "hey, you!" her excitement comes out awkwardly, like a teenage girl trying to talk to her crush despite her heart and brain not cooperating normally like it had only seconds before.

"hey, y/n," he laughed, still not quite used to her shy demeanor on the phone. "you up to chill?" he asks, making y/n almost scream out a yes to him. but she couldn't, obviously. chaewon was over and she didn't want to kick her friend out just to hang out with a boy, especially knowing chaewon wouldn't do that to her.

"i would but my friend chae is hereㅡ"

"it's fine!" chaewon interrupts the girl, her head appearing behind y/n's in the tiny box as she waved to jake who responded with a nod. "i was just getting ready to head out soon," she walks closer, giving y/n a kiss on the cheek as y/n lowers the camera for privacy. "mwah. bye, i love you. let me know if the bloating goes down so i know whether to register you as my plus one for my next session."

"okay, okay. i love you too," y/n responds, chaewon leaving soon after. y/n finally moves her attention back to jake who was clearly eavesdropping the entire time with a cheeky smile on his face.

"bloating for what? are you on your period?" he asks, making her groan annoyed by his nosiness. "hey c'mon it's a natural thing, you can talk about it with me. plus, you know a period don't stop nothing but a sentence," he winks only making the girl groan more.

"you're gross," she gagged dramatically, making the boy burst out into a fit of laughter. "there's no way i'm having sex with you on my period," she added on, but he only laughed harder.

"why not? c'mon don't knock it till you try it! let's try it out today," he persists making her pout her lips as she thought about it. it could just be another thing she could cross off of her list of irrelevant things she did pertaining to sex.

"maybe, but i won't be getting my period for another week since i didn't come on it this week like the app said i would," she says, shrugging her shoulders. "huh. you didn't peg me to be the kind of guy who's into that stuff."

"oh, i'm not. but i think i'll be into anything that involves you, y/n."

"ugh, don't directly address me when you say things like that, you know how it gets me!"

"maybe i want you to get like that. how sexy is phone sex?"

"doesn't sound any better than real sex."

"maybe to you, i'm getting hard just listening to your voice."

"oh my god. goodnight, jake," y/n's eyes widened as she hung up, a small smile painting her lips.

waking up the next morning, and after immediately looking in the mirror, the bloating did not go down. a disappointed sigh left y/n's lips as she threw one of jake's sweatshirts over her tank top to cover the 'obvious' difference in her appearance as she made her way to campus, already dreading the day.

upon arrival, she met chaewon in their usual spots for their lecture, seeing the girl with coffee for the both of them. offering her friend a thankful smile, she took a sip of the coffee, eager for its bittersweetness to wake her up as it usually did. but her sip was quickly, and secretly spit back into the cup as an indescribable amount of disgust flooded her taste buds.

"jesus, who pissed in this coffee? it's disgusting," the girl asked, making her friend's eyebrows scrunch together in confusion. she'd known y/n's order by heart; it's been prepared by the same worker for months. y/n's never been dissatisfied with the taste of the coffee before.

"he's prepared it the same way he does every morning, so i'm confused," chaewon says, watching y/n try to give the coffee another chance by taking a longer sip, immediately gagging as she lets it drip back down into the cup again. now even the smell of it was unbearable. she pushes the coffee away all together.

"well it's shitty today, let's just get some more later," she responded, both girls shrugging it off as they listened to their professor's talking once again. y/n was tempted several times after the fact to drink the coffee, but she was too sickened by its taste and smell. she eventually got up and threw the whole cup away all together, hating the way her body was responding to it.

when lunch rolled around, it was safe to say they both had forgotten about the morning's coffee incident, and y/n was already more than excited to eat the lunch she had yet to order. though the summer sun hadn't gone yet, the heat was certainly making its way out. temperatures outside were fine, so the walk from their hall to the building holding the university's lunchroom went smoothly, however the air conditioning had murderous intent when they entered the building.

"god i hate this building," chaewon groans as she zips her jacket up, which worked to no avail as the fabric was nowhere near thick. y/n nodded in agreement as they both subconsciously agreed they'd eat quickly so they could just leave. getting into different lines, y/n walked over to the soup station, getting her favorite vegetable soup that always made the freezing AC temperatures more bearable. she fixes a smaller bowl than she usually would, already beginning her dieting journey to lose the weight she'd gained.

once she added her side dishes, she met chaewon at the table with the most sunlight shining through the big, wide open windows, eager to get the warmth that this building insisted heavily on denying.

"we should've just ordered takeout instead," y/n grumbled, sipping a spoonful of her soup juice as she closed her eyes, the steam from her soup fanning her face as a "thank you for choosing to eat me today." savoring the soup, as she usually did, she immediately cringed at the horrible taste that flooded her mouth. "my god, why is everything so shitty today? first the coffee, now this?" it was clear that her mood was plummeting from her sudden disdain towards the food she loved most. she pushed her tray away, saddened, making chaewon sigh with pity.

"do you just want some of my lasagna?" she knew y/n wouldn't want it, but she couldn't stand to see her best friend so upset about not being able to eat. it was a dumb question, because it was something y/n hated the most, but y/n nodded, pushing her tray over to the girl. chaewon is confused but gives her a reasonable amount to eat, not too much as it would go to waste if she didn't eat it, but not too little as to have her request for more in the event that it wasn't enough.

reluctantly, she takes her fork and digs into the lasagna, hating everything about it, but the smell seemed a lot more inviting that what it had been only months before, the time frame she first decided she hated the entree. taking a hesitant bite into it, her eyes shot wide open as she began chewing. it was delicious. and she didn't know why. she opted to eat more of it, quickly downing the food as she looked at chaewon, begging for more to which, of course, the girl obliged. she wasn't that hungry anyways.

days had gone by since y/n had found a new love for lasagna, she even branched out the different flavors they offered, becoming obsessed with the spinach-alfredo lasagna. they were two combinations she knew she'd usually hate being put together, but she couldn't stop eating them. and though chaewon never said it aloud, she was confused. so confused. especially confused when y/n had suddenly started gagging, on the verge of vomiting only minutes after she'd eaten so deliciously. but, she rushed to the bathroom with her friend, ready to assist her nonetheless.

it's was a sad thing for her, watching her friend look so sick and helpless over the toilet while her body kept forcing her food up, not even stopping after the fact that her stomach emptied, telling her she still needed to throw more up. when she finished, her whole body was shaking, and she was on the verge of tears from the burning she felt in her throat.

she insisted she was fine, her solution being to eat again to make up for the food lost, but after having several incidents of vomiting to the point of tears, all of them with chaewon being her personal witness, she couldn't quite convince the girl anything anymore, reluctantly having to agree to seeing the doctor and get to the bottom of it. but they weren't ready for any of the questions that the doctor would ask the poor, and naive, y/n.

"have you been sexually active in the last few months, miss l/n? more importantly, without protection?" doctor kim asks, taking both y/n and chaewon by surprise. she looks over to her friend, feeling uncomfortable by the question, but chaewon only gives her a sympathetic smile as she encourages her to answer the doctor.

"yes.. but i don't see why that matters?" y/n replies, essentially dismissing the doctor's question. there was no correlation between the two, she was just feeling a little under the weather. or maybe it was a result of her semi-depression from her weight gain? there were so many possibilities. "we think i may have a stomach bug," she adds on, making the doctor click his teeth in response. he sighs, adjusting his glasses as he looked past her, not wanting to cause conflict, but still needing to do his job.

"well, miss l/n, i'm not suggesting anything big, but since you have had unprotected sex, your symptoms are seeming to lean a lot toward-"

"i'm sorry ,doctor kim, but i don't need suggestions. i'm paying you to use your damn degree and use facts to get to the bottom of this, not suggest my symptoms have anything to do with the sex i have in my life," y/n spits out, grabbing chaewon's hand to lead her out the door.

"you go, i'll be a quick second," chaewon smiles at the agitated girl who only nodded as she stormed her way to the car. letting out the breath she'd been holding, she bowed apologetically to the doctor. "i'm sorry, doc. she's been really moody since she gained weight. she's usually the sweetest girl!"

"i see," he responds. "she may not be willing to right now, but i recommend coming back soon and getting an ultrasound to see if my thoughts may be correct," he says, getting ready to head out the room, since he no longer needed to be there, having other patients to tend to.

he'd already been long gone by then, but chaewon still responded to him. it was more for herself anyways. "i'll think about it."

looking in the mirror every morning became a habit for y/n. she absolutely hated the way she looked. she felt like she was in a body that wasn't her own, her mental health only worsening with each day she decides to stare in the mirror. she was lonely. she'd been skipping classes, telling chaewon she was just too lazy to go to, but doing that meant chaewon wouldn't be there to support her rapidly growing illness. and she couldn't just call jake, either. they argued too much and they both hated it, deciding that no contact was better than enduring the toxicity any longer.

but today, she couldn't endure not speaking to him any longer. she'd grown far more dependent on him, realizing her days of misery could only be made better by him. so, even though she knew that calling him most likely wouldn't end well, she hit the facetime button, watching with anticipation as she waited for him to pick up.

"y/n," his sigh of happiness only brought a smile to her face, and for a second everything felt better, even her stuffed nose seemed to clear for a second. her eyes watered, but she quickly blinked the forming tears away because no y/n you will NOT cry. "i missed you," he says, making her heart flutter as he frowned through the screen.

"i'm sorry," was all she could say, lumps forming in her throat. why did this have to make her so emotional? she'd never cried over something as simple as this before, it wasn't rare for jake to express his feelings for her in this way, but for whatever reason she decided that hearing all of this now meant and felt more than anything. "i missed you, too."

"how have you been?" he asks, making her lips form a thin line. she never did tell him of her illness, being scared that he'd stop coming over in fear of catching her symptoms.

"i've been bored, there's never anything to do these days, and i'm too lazy to go out."

"hm. then how about i come over and give you something to do?" his question was laced with suggestiveness, making her feel an uneasy amount of insecurity. she really wanted to have him come over, more than anything, but it just couldn't happen. not when she felt like this. and not when she looked like this either.

"i don't know, i'm pretty tired right now, too," she laughs nervously, making him sigh.

"please, y/n. it doesn't even have to be sex. i just want to be with you. i miss you," while it didn't seem like much to him to admit it, it meant the world to y/n. she felt like he really wanted her. and in a way, he did, so of course, she let her heart fall right into his arms. even though her doubts and insecurities begged her to say no, she refused to listen this time.

"okay," her heart was beating fast, unsureness running through her veins, but all of it was worth it. any ill feeling would be worth it if it meant she'd get to see his smileㅡ a smile that only existed because of her.

"say less," he giggled, hanging up the phone. she let out the breath she was holding, her senses awakening as she realized all of what she just agreed to. she looked at her outfit, too revealing for the way she was looking right now. "shorts are fine, but i need a bigger shirt," she spoke to no one but herself as she went to her closet to put on an oversized hoodie in hopes he wouldn't be able to see how "ugly" she'd become.

it didn't take long for him to arrive, engulfing her in his arms as soon as she opened the door. it was times like this that made her wonder, why would she even want to fight with him to begin with? she's head over heels in love with him; arguing with him only took away these moments from her. she couldn't stand it.

"pretty girl, you've lost your glow," he says after they pull away from their drawn out hug, grabbing her face, moving it around in his eyesight as he frowned. her eyes were accompanied with dark eye bags, her cheeks were puffy, and her skin seemed to have paled quite a bit since he'd last been over. she could only smile bitterly, that's what no sleep does to you, she thinks.

"it's because you haven't been here to shine on me," she laughed, taking his hand to walk to her bedroom where they both sat on her bed. he laughs along, happy upon the realization that they most likely wouldn't get into an argument since the majority of their arguments happened digitally.

"well we're together now, so that's all that matters," he says, making her smile. she nods, taking a second to look at him while he turns his attention to the tv, already browsing through netflix to put on a show or movie he thought they'd be able to enjoy. she didn't realize how fond she'd grown of him until now, but maybe she just forgets about it until moments like this come up for her to acknowledge them once again.

the universe was unfair to her, in more ways than one, but giving her this special relationship with jake made all of the hardships disappear. she liked jake. and even though she knew he didn't feel the same way, she liked that his actions made her feel like he did. and they shared a lot of intimate moments, so even if she didn't necessarily have the real label she wanted, there was nothing that could stop her from pretending.

maybe that's the thought that kept her going, allowing him to make himself at home in her heart more and more with each passing moment they shared. maybe that's what made her stop looking at other men the way she looked at him. maybe that's what accidentally brought her lips onto his, cupping his cheeks as her eyes closed in relief when he kissed her back. it was always heavenly to kiss jake, but this time it felt better than that. he kept her slow speed, not bothering to pull her on his lap, yet, as he was determined to savor this moment in fear of it never happening again. he moves his hand up to her cheek as she let hers fall down to her side, smiling into the kiss as he stroked her cheek lovingly.

it felt like an eternity, them staying like that. but, jake was never patient when it came to these things. and it wasn't far from how y/n was either, so naturally he attempted to escalate it, his body already anticipating how good they were going to make each other feel. but as soon as he attempted to slide his tongue in, y/n panicked, squeezing her eyes shut as she pulled away, face hot with embarrassment as she saw the confusion the boy had on his face.

"is everything okay?" he asked, putting his hand on her shoulder gently so as to not startle the girl more than he already seemed to. she averted eye contact, but nodded nonetheless. "did i do something wrong? did i make you uncomfortable-?" he asked further, thoughts spinning around his head as to why she'd pull back.

"no i'm sorry," cutting him off, her voice was low as she didn't really want him to hear her confessionㅡ afraid it would spiral into another argument given her contradicting actions. "i just.. dont want to have sex," all the thoughts and reasons he'd listed before flew out the window, his mind going quiet as did he.

"you're seeing someone else. is that it?"

"wha- no, jake! i just-"

"there's nothing else it could be," he says, making her frown. jake had been suspecting this for a while. he'd never had any problems with her whenever they called or facetimed, or even texted before. but for the past few weeks, that's all that's been happening. he'd somehow say the 'wrong' thing and she'd blow off on him, it would spiral into something worse, then they would just stop talking until one of them texts again. the last time he'd gone through that, his fling ended up leaving him and moving onto a serious relationship, something they swore they would never be able to doㅡ well, clearly not with him at least.

"jake, i swear it's not like that!" y/n's heart was beating out of her chest, she could feel his sadness even though everything he said was monotone. he was hurting over something that she wasn't even doing. and the way he already seemed so sure of it? it made her wonder how long he'd been feeling this way.

"then why do you keep leading me on and then backing out when you're the one who initiated it? are you seeing someone else, y/n?" his eyes were starting to gloss over, and she hated it. so, so much. she didn't know what to do. admitting the truth would only make him leave. her silence only further proved the point he convinced himself that he was making. adding fuel to the fire- "do i only tempt you enough to try but not go through with it? am i SO bad at fucking you that you have to go find someone else to do bette-"

"i'm not thin anymore, okay?!" she finally had the courage to cut him off, tears streaming down her face that had become hot from her frustrations caused by his baseless, but very, very hurtful accusations.

"what?"

"i've gotten fat. and-," she sighed, trying to regain her composure. "i want so badly to have sex with you, but i'm scared. i'm scared that i'll take off these baggy clothes and- you'll be disgusted by my body and leave me. i would never be so evil as to go out of my way to cheat and hurt you. this is only happening because i hate myself and my body for what it's becoming. i can't let you see me be like this."

"baby..." his voice is soft, contradicting the anger it projected only moments before. even though that one word was a great comfort to her, it only worsened her rainfall of tears as she allowed herself to break down in his arms. it was something he'd never understand. she was beautiful in his eyes, nothing would change that. "i don't care if you gain weight, or lose weight. hell, you could wake up bald and i would still find you to be the sexiest girl alive. don't you ever think otherwise."

she nodded, pulling away to look him in the eyes, her pout failing to disappear despite the fact that she was starting to feel a little bit better about it. he smiled at her bringing his lips to her forehead for a kiss, then to each individual cheeks, then finally to her lips in a kiss that was sweeter than the one shared beforeㅡ only she would let it escalate this time.

pulling back, she looked him lovingly in the eyes. they were shining the same way hers were as he pulled her back in for a hard, but not too hard, peck on the lips, more following after them as he wanted to bask in all the moment had to offer. her giggle only made him smile as he pecked her lips one last time before he went to shower each cheek with kisses as well. once he felt he'd spread the love there enough, he tilted her head to the side, trailing kisses over her neck, not any lower as his sweatshirt was in the way. moving back up, he kissed her ear before he whispered a low "take this off," while tugging on the sweatshirt that had now become a barrier between the two of them.

obeying his request, she lifted the fabric off, throwing it across the room as her body shivered from the temperature change on her bare arms. he laughed, latching his mouth back onto her neck, this time carefully sucking, leaving his own marks of love behind for her to be able to look back to if she were to question his love for her again. tugging the bottom of her shirt as she assisted him in lifting it off her head, the shirt being carelessly thrown somewhere across the room like the jacket.

he changed his position, kneeling with either knee on her side as he pushed her slightly to lay her down on the bed. he stared down at her body, scanning the beauty she was. it was then that she realized she had nothing to cover her top half, her stomach was on display for him to see and, despite his comforting words, she became embarrassed. not wanting to make it obvious that she was feeling insecure, she pulled him down to connect their lips together. letting their tongues dance with one another, he lets his hands travel down her sides, moving to spread her legs for him to grind his crotch against her, the sensations leaving them both gasping at how much they'd been neglecting their sexual needs with their petty arguments.

"fuck," she moaned into his mouth which only drove him crazy. god, words couldn't explain how much he loved those sounds she made. he pulled away, going to take off his shirt while she nearly drooled at the sight of it. everything about that man was perfect to her.

"fuck, y/n," he breathed out as he kept rolling his hips against hers, biting his lip to hold back the lewd sounds his body begged him to make. "how am i supposed to go slow when you're this sexy without trying?" his words made her tear up as she covered her face which was now hot with her shyness. the sight of it made his hips stutter, of course only she could bring him that close to climax without doing anything but being her.

he moved away from her, the warmth they shared being the first thing they missed as he pulled her shorts down, throwing it across the room as she leaned forward to pull his sweatpants down enough for him to scoot out of on his own. his cock sprung up, hitting his lower abdomen as she stared at it in all its glory: fully erect, reddened tip glistening with precum. just how she liked it. they both giggled at the fact that they both were intentionally not wearing underwear. "wanted to fuck me that bad, huh?" he smirked, leaning down to connect their lips in a kiss which she smiled in. when he pulled away she smirked back at him.

"i could say the same, baby."

he sucked in a breath, halfway opening his eyes as he began lightly stroking himself, making sure to make eye contact with her. "ah- y/n, you don't know what you do to me," he whimpered as she could only watch him with doe eyes. before he could get too comfortable stroking himself, and before she could get too comfortable watching the show, he rubbed his tip through her folds, then circled her clit (just to make her feel good) before he slowly inserted himself in.

she winced at the stretch, it really had been a while since they last had sex. he bit his lip as he pushed all the way in, unmoving. he moved his hand down, using his thumb to rub on her clit which resulted in her clenching around him. he slightly threw his head back, sighing in content at the feeling. "that's right. keep doing that," he says as he pulls out nearly all the way, only to slam himself back in completely before he decided on a pace. everything about their togetherness was just right. they knew exactly how to make each other feel good. that's what lovemaking to them was. they didn't need to be slow paced or have foreplay or perform oral before they fucked; the love showed in the way they could absorb every essence of each other's being. the way their energies combined and turned them into one.

his pace wasn't too slow, nor was it too fast. it was just enough for her to feel all of him, and it was enough to hit all the right spots, wherever she needed him most. the room was silent except for the small sounds of pleasure they both made, accompanied with the sex sounds their bodies created. he leaned forward, connecting their lips in a sweet kiss, cause everyone knows he couldn't get enough of kissing her. she returned the kiss, tears prickling in her eyes from how good everything was feeling. she loved this. she loved him. "i'm close, baby," he pulled back to announce, speeding his strokes up ever so slightly as he chased his high.

"me too," she announced, this time clenching around him more while her heartbeat only raced, each thrust bringing her closer. he rubbed circles around her clit faster as her moans started becoming more vocal, the pitch raising with each thrust until one thrust finally hit the spot. "ah, jake dont stop," she begged as he sped up to chase his own high. "dont pull out, it's okay! fuck i wanna feel it." he couldn't hold back any longer upon her words, thrusting one last time before he came to a complete stop, filling her with his seed.

"fuck," he breathed out, slowly lowering himself to be on top of her. he scooted so that she could be able to lay her head on his. it wasn't often that jake would stay cuddled up to her after they finished having sex, but he felt like he owed it to her for how shitty he had made her feel without knowing the full story. it wasn't often that he whispered sweet little nothings into her ear while stroking her hair, but tonight (despite their strict forbidden rule of affection) it felt needed. and he was willing to give her anything he felt like she needed. every action and choice he decided to make only further showed that he loved her, in a way.

even though he was sure he wasn't capable of feeling it anymore, this special relationship jake shared with her made all of his doubts about love disappear. he liked y/n. and even though it was something he'd never be able to express or accept it, he'd let his emotions be shown in the moment as they were. and, like most of everything that they did that didn't make sense, it always seemed to work out.

the sun shining through the blinds, accompanied with the unforgiving air conditioning that froze her skin, y/n yawned as she got up, rubbing her eyes. pulling the blanket up to cover her body, she looked next to her for jake, but he wasn't there. she knew that regardless of how affectionate he was last night that there'd be a chance he would still leave during the night, but it hurts to know that no matter what he'd say or do, he'd still be gone in the morning.

her tears start their early morning shift, brimming in her eyes as she pouted at the whole idea of him leaving her altogether. the tears turning into a rainfall of agony as she sobbed to her heart's content, only to be interrupted by her overwhelming need to puke. running to the bathroom she can't make it to the toilet, having to quickly choose between the floor or the sink, her brain choosing the latter of the two.

holding the edge of the sink, her head was bent over so as to not make too much of a mess. she let her first round of puke come up, feeling disgusted with herself for not being quicker. one she was finished she barely had time to recover as she took the chance to run to the toilet, finally being able to vomit there as she originally intended. it hurt and tasted like hell after she was finished, but that of course wouldn't be the end of her misfortune. upon hearing her alarm go off, she realized that she only had 15 minutes to get ready.

snoozing the alarm she immediately dialed chaewon's phone, screaming incoherent words as a weak attempt to ask for help. chaewon's eyes widened as her car's speaker blasted y/n's crying into her ears. "woah, woah, woah!" chaewon said, cutting the girl's screaming off. "talk in a way where i can understand you."

"i keep- i can't stop throwing up, i'm scared i wont be able to make it to school!" she cries out. "please chaewon, i know i ask for a lot but i need you right now," she begs the girl who was only two or three turns away from the university building. as the red light finally turned green, she sighed, making a turn that led her back on the path from where she'd originally traveled to come to school.

"i'm on my way," she lets y/n know, making her way to the nearest drugstore to make a quick purchase. y/n sighs of relief, her tear stained cheeks lifting slightly as she smiled at her friend's support through her hardships.

"thank you, chae," she says, holding onto her now empty and hurting stomach. "i'll make it up to you."

"you don't have to make anything up to me y/n. you need my help, so i'm giving it to you. just please take care of yourself until i get there, i have to make a quick stop, okay?" she says as she gets out of the car, her phone call disconnects from the car and back to her phone.

"okay," y/n sniffles as she begins coughing up a storm, gagging as she tried her best to hold down another load of vomit.

"okay, i'll hang up first. bye."

not waiting for a response, she ends the call and walks into the store. after a quick search, she immediately went over to the corner where the items lay bare for everyone to see. she picked up one of the pregnancy tests, ignoring the looks she felt on her. it was nobody's business anyways. when she went over to the register, older customers gave her judging looks, which she only smiled in return at. as soon as she got to the front, she smacked the box down, not bothering to get any other items as it would just add onto her time in the building.

"what are you hoping for?" the young cashier attempts to ask her kindly, but you can tell she was judging her too. if it had actually been chaewon in this situation where she'd need the pregnancy test for herself, she would have been passive back, but it's not her. so she didn't need to be letting it get in her head regardless of how stressful it was to be here.

"a girl," she puts on a fake smile and enthusiastic voice, praying the kid would hurry up and scan the item. once she was done doing that, she put the item in a plastic bag, quickly handing it to her.

"wishing you the best of luck as a mother!" she says to which chaewon could only nod at as she rushed out of the building and back into her car. now, chaewon wasn't the kind of citizen to speed. she knew it wasn't safe for anyone and honestly she hated it because it never felt nice to her body, especially when she was the one behind the wheels. but after the call with y/n, she had to because she knew how much y/n needed her there.

when she had let herself in using the key that y/n gifted her months ago, she ran quickly to see the girl's head hanging carelessly in the toilet as she barely moved. "y/n?" she asks, going over to her. y/n only hummed in response to assure the girl that she was still conscious. she wanted to talk, but everytime she tried to muster up words, that awfully familiar gagging overpowered her. and she didn't want to go through throwing up again, so she gave up, resorting to laying in her misery as there was nothing more she could do.

"gross, y/n," chewon says as she moves over to the sink where it was filled with her vomit, the scent making chaewon gag a little. she turns the sink water on, going under the sink to get some bleach out in hopes of it helping with washing it down. "you couldn't make it to the toilet in enough time?"

"no," y/n cries out, voice hoarse from all of it already as she gags more, another load of vomit forcing its way up as the scent of her throw up and bleach met her nose. chaewon yelps as she helps the girl throw up smoothly, holding her hair back until her body finally realizes she couldn't throw up anymore, though it was already too late by now.

the cleanup process went a lot smoother than they both expected. chaewon ordered y/n to get a sip of water to soothe her throat while she busied herself with cleaning the sink and the toilet since y/n was already so careful not to make a mess anywhere else. when both of them were finished, they laid on y/n's bed with chaewon stroking y/n's hair, the pregnancy test being the only thing on her mind. she was torn. she didn't know if she should bring it up to her, but it was the only thing on her mind since they first went to her doctor's appointment. she also was scared it would upset y/n. her emotions were unstable as of lately, and she didn't want to be on the receiving end of it, at least not now.

"y/n?" she finally speaks up after a few more minutes of internal conflict about it. y/n hummed in response. "you and jake don't use protection, right?" she asks, making y/n groan annoyed. "don't catch an attitude with me, just answer the question."

"we don't use protection, chaewon."

"okay then does he like, you know, pull out?" she asks further, making y/n stiffen up in embarrassment.

"yes."

"are you sure?"

"yes chae! god damn it," y/n says as she finally catches onto what chaewon was suggesting, blowing off the steam that was building up. it makes chaewon a bit more hesitant, but she has to do this for her; she didn't want y/n to keep living in denial if she didn't have to.

"y/n, i need you to think really hard about this. i get that you're frustrated, but i'm only asking because i want to help you... please. there has to be a time when you weren't sure if he did or not. or maybe he was a little too late to?" she is careful with her words, but they still manage to break y/n's walls down as she bursts into tears upon remembering the one important night she had so carelessly forgotten.

"there was- uh one night," she says. "i don't remember if he'd pulled out soon enough because we were both too tired to be safe about it."

"do you remember when?"

"i think it was sometime last month, but i don't really remember. all I know is that i texted you to hang out the day after because the sleep i got was so good. god chae, i don't even want to think that this could be a possibility," y/n was exasperated. she didn't want to be pregnant. anything but that. but chaewon just kept pushing the idea in her head, making her terrified that it'd be an actual possibility.

"i know, love, but i'm asking this for your own good. now, i have something for you, but you can't freak out okay?" she says as she lifts the girl's head off of her stomach, leaning into her bag to pull out the box she'd purchased.

"okay," y/n says as she looks over to chaewon's busy hands as she puts the box behind her back. "can i see?"

"okay, breathing under control?" chaewon asks. y/n nods. "and don't. freak. out. it's going to be okay," she adds on. y/n nods again as she breathes steadily, her eyes closing as she gathers her senses together without anticipating what chaewon could give her. "keep your eyes closed and just grab the box i'm about to put in your hands.

following her instructions, she gripped onto the box as soon as she felt it in her hands. opening her eyes, she couldn't help but tear up at the sight of it. she knew that her friend would give it to her eventually, but now? she wasn't ready. her grip on the box tightened as she shook her head.

"it's okay, y/n. calm down. breathe, then get up and go take the test," chaewon said, lifting the girl up as another form of encouragement. "no matter what the test says, i'm here with my undying support for you. fighting girl!"

"fighting," y/n sniffles as she goes into the bathroom, leaving an emotional chaewon behind. she sighs, laying down again to stare at the ceiling, her own tears starting to form. it hurt. all of it. from having y/n taking her frustrations out on the girl, down to each tear that spilled from y/n's eyes as she realized her life could truly be changing. she hated seeing her best friend cry, especially knowing that she didn't deserve any of that heartache. it felt selfish to sit and cry about it as if she were the one in y/n's place, but she couldn't help it.

taking a shaky breath, she exhaled in an attempt to calm herself down. she needed to be rational. if this is hard for me, then it must be hell for y/n. she quickly wipes her tears as y/n screams and falls to the bathroom floor, only a few minutes after waiting for the results. chaewon ran into the bathroom, shocked by the solemn scene in front of her. y/n, with shaky hands, held up the test to the girl's face. it was an unmistakable "YES+" on the stick. with widened eyes, chaewon pulled the sobbing girl into a hug. y/n was actually pregnant. and with jake's child at that.

"i don't want it!" she cries out as chaewon nods, quickly removing one arm from her as she began looking up clinics for an abortion.

"okay, i found some clinics," the girl says. "we can set up an appointment when you're all calmed down, okay?"

"okay."

"now let's get you to bed; you look terrible," she helped y/n clean herself up, brushing her tasseled hair into a low ponytail, washing and moisturizing her dry face, putting her pregnancy test into a bag just in case. by the time they were finished, the atmosphere had calmed down and everything seemed okay now that y/n came to terms with her conditions. she was just glad that this would all be over soon.

when the two girls finally got settled down, they decided tonight it'd be best if y/n wasn't left alone. cuddling while watching bojack horseman, talking didn't seem all that important now that y/n had a warm embrace that wouldn't leave her in the middle of the night. she nuzzles her head into chaewon's neck with a yawn. "thank you for taking care of me, chae. i love you." it catches chaewon by surprise, but she just silently smiles, deciding not to say anything since y/n was audibly snoring by now. looking down at her best friend's sleeping figure, she pauses the show and prays to god that y/n, and everything, will be okay.

august 31st. today was the day y/n's life would change forever. she wondered why nobody told her that the drive to the clinic would be so gut wrenching. when she arrives, she signs in for her appointment and sits down to wait. she got a good look around the building. there were many people here, some accompanied by lovers, others with parents, while there was the noticeable few who were alone like she was. the air wasn't as thick as she'd anticipated, but she learned from chaewon that not everyone who went to these buildings were there for abortions. a big part of her was jealous of that because oh how nice would it have been to have been able to find comfort in such a heavy decision. but the other part was thankful; she wouldn't wish this dreadful feeling on her worst enemy, and yet here she was, feeling it to its fullest extent.

chaewon sadly couldn't make it. well, y/n wouldn't allow her to, begging her not to miss any more days. it was a difficult thing to convince her, since she knew chaewon could switch to online school like she temporarily opted to do for a more flexible schedule during her pregnancy until she could put an end to it and go back to her regular classes. she'd already caused chaewon to miss so much, she'd feel guilty if she'd done it again, even if right now all she could do was wish she let herself be selfish one last time because all she wanted was to be comforted by the only person who could possibly understand her problems without judgment. she sighed, sinking down into her seat as she watched the muted television on the screen, praying her turn would come soon so she could get out of this place.

"y/n l/n?" a sweet nurse's voice called out as she looked around the waiting area. y/n's eyes widened as they were met with the nurse's who beckoned her over. her heart was beating fast as she walked behind the lady who was escorting to one of the clinic rooms where she would soon be met with the doctor who would be performing the abortion. being left alone in the room was either one of the best case scenarios right now, or possibly the worst. she could be alone for a second to calm down, or she could potentially break down before the doctor could even speak a word to her. deciding she's already cried enough tears this month, she opted to taking a deep breath to remind herself that this was her decision to make, and this was what she wanted.

"good evening, miss l/n, i'm doctor kim," a voice spoke as it entered the door. y/n turned her head slightly to the woman. she was around her mid-forties, but something about her reminded her of her mother, her aura was comforting in that sense. "i assume you're here to get an abortion performed?"

"yes, doctor," y/n responds, lowering her head since she'd suddenly become afraid to make eye contact with the woman upon the mention of the specific procedure that was soon to be performed.

"oh, miss l/n," the doctor pouted, making y/n look up at her. "before we start, i'm legally obligated to tell you the process before we perform it," the doctor explained as she placed her gloves on with a slight smacking sound. y/n nodded, then the process explanation began. as the words spilled out of doctor kim's mouth, y/n couldn't help but feel sick to her stomach. her brain started zoning out everything the doctor was saying, the only phrase she could hear in her head was her brain telling her to get out. all she could think to herself was i don't wanna do this anymore. what felt like hours, but was only around ten minutes later, the doctor finally brought her attention back with a clap.

"so?" she asks. "are you ready?" offering a comforting smile that made y/n feel anything but. she could hear her heart beating inside her chest, her breathing suddenly drowning out all the noise around her. suddenly everything felt all too much yet nothing at all. she stayed still, trying her best to process her emotions, to state her peace, or to just right out leave.

"i need to use the restroom," she squeaked out, tears brimming in her eyes as she avoided any form of eye contact with the older lady in front of her. doctor kim senses the mood shift and sighs. this was an often occurrence, so she could only understand where the girl was coming from.

"look, kid. abortion isn't for everyone," she says placing her hand on her shoulder. "you're young so you think it's the only option for you, but it isn't. there are lots of good young mothers. you can do this. i don't want you to make a decision you'll end up regretting for the rest of your life. i can see you care about your baby. give them a chance at life, give yourself this chance in life."

y/n frowns, her lips quivering as the building tears spill from her eyes. "i'm sorry," she says, burying her head inside her hands. "i'm so sorry," she apologizes, unsure what she's really sorry for, she just felt like this was all she could say.

"don't be sorry, miss l/n," doctor kim responds, helping the girl to get off her feet, taking her over to the sink to help her get herself together again. "you know, you can always come back again. we give free ultrasounds, i'm sure you'd love to see your little angel growing."

”i'll try my best," she responds as soon as the tears subside. they bid their farewells and just like that, y/n was on her way back home. and, though she felt a huge burden had been lifted off of her shoulder, she was devastated. she had to tell jake.. and that was the biggest burden of it all. exhaustion was the first thing to hit her once she arrived back inside, she was so exhausted that she almost didn't take her shoes off at the doorㅡ almost. she goes to lay down, flopping on her bed to stare at the ceiling. it was weird. this has been the first time she didn't feel the need or want to cry. instead, her brain was doing its best to think logically despite not knowing exactly what to do.

she knows one thing for sure, though: she has to call jake immediately to have him come over to break the news to him, but the problem was that she was scared. she knew without a doubt that jake adored her, but he didn't love her. they were fuck buddies, not lovers, so in terms of what she could expect from him, there was nothing. she was at a complete blank, her only way of finding out would be to put herself in the position to do so. and though she hated the idea of having to do it, it wasn't just some decision she could just back out of. so, she picks up her phone, her hand shaking as she clicks the button to dial his number. the phone rang a few times before his sweet voice sung into her ear. "hello?" he asks, making her fears start to pile up. what exactly was she supposed to say to him?

"can you come over?" she asks, her voice tinier than the sureness she was feeling. "please, like hurry up. i'm sorry for everything, i can't be on the phone too long, just hurry up." upon hearing that, jake's heart broke into pieces. he could barely process what was happening, all he knew was that he was rushing out the door and into his car as he sped to her house. after she ended the call, she released the breath she was holding, getting up to look at herself in the full body mirror. she lifted her tank top up, rubbing her 2 months pregnant belly as a river of relief washed over her. there was something so comforting about the "weight gain" now. and she decided that, no matter what, she was going to keep it. in the midst of admiring her changing body, she jumps upon hearing jake's banging on the door.

he was anxious, thinking the worst upon her sudden call that lacked context, but he didn't want to assume the worst as he was still feeling guilty about what happened last time he'd said his unspoken insecurities aloud. with her heart beating fast, she opens the door and silently lets him in. stay calm, y/n. she keeps reminding herself in her mind as she knew that was the best way to get through this challenge. she ushers for him to sit on the bed, quietly taking a seat next to him but with great distance as she was still fearful. he notices this, so when they finally make eye contact she could see the insecurities blooming through. and it broke her. "i'm so sorry," she bawls out, throwing herself onto him. her tears dont catch him by much surprise, but it doesn't stop him from feeling the emotional toll from them. he is sad, but he accepts the pitiful embrace. she's really done it, he cries to himself, the tears landing on top of her head.

he doesn't even want to ask who, why, or even why he couldn't just be enough for her. he just wants to lie and pretend it's all okay so that she'll stay with him, even if he'll regret it. "i'm so sorry," she apologizes for the hundredth time, to which he once again responds with his verbal forgiveness. she hated it. she hated being a coward in that sense. she hated not being able to tell him of her pregnancy, but she just couldn't bring herself to do it. "please don't leave me tonight," she begs as she was scared to wake up without him again because there was no certainty that he'd ever come back. he gulps in an attempt to swallow the lump forming in his throat. it doesn't work. "okay," he responds, not sure of what else he could possibly say to her. how can you comfort someone when you're in need of comfort, too? "i mean it, jake, i can't stand waking up without you, at least not now," y/n admits and it hurts jake. "promise me you'll be here when i wake."

"i promise," he says, determined to fulfill whatever need she asked from him in hopes of her continued loyalty to him. "i'll stay forever if i need toㅡ if you need me to," he says as if his honesty wasn't convincing enough. she knows he doesn't mean it in the way she needs him to, but she still lets his words comfort those unheard doubts that are plaguing her mind. she eventually pulls away, looking him in the eyes as she offers a bitter smile. she brings her thumbs up to wipe his tears away. "there's nobody else, jake," she says, seemingly being able to reassure him without him having to say a word. he sighs, and smiles back at her, choosing not to question the real issue she wanted to bring up to him. if it hurt her that much, he would wait longer to find out. but, to him, nothing could be worse to him than her finding a new man. so he'd be ready to accept and forgive anything else that she felt would burden him.

"let's just sleep," he says, laying down. she nods, moving so that he could lay on her chest. her heart was racing; she could never get used to the feeling he gave her. he smiled at the rate it was going. all of that was for him. oh, if only he knew that all those unspoken feelings were mutual. maybe then things would be easier for the two of them. but, as of right now, they would both continue to suffer in this lovesick state.

it was easy to fall asleep with him like that, and it was even easier to wake up with him in her arms. the sun was shining on them, the AC's temperature was just right for the two of them who had forgotten to get under the blanket, and the air was calm. it was a state of being that she didn't want to leave, but she had no knowledge of his work schedule, so she needed him to be up. she kisses the top of his head shyly. he scrunches his nose while she continues doing it until he moves enough for her to understand that he, too, was awake. "good morning," his voice was groggy as he was still not fully awake. she doesn't respond, letting him get up to freshen up. he walks into the bathroom, sitting on the toilet to go about his business. once he finishes, he flushes and goes to look at himself in the mirror.

his hair was disheveled and his eyes were puffy, but he felt like a million bucks as he smiled at his reflection. "nobody else, huh?" he giggles, smile widening as he applied the soap on his hands to wash them. once he finished washing them, he began drying them off on the towel as he started wondering what she had to tell him last night.

when he goes back out, he finds y/n in the kitchen grabbing some frozen breakfast burritos out of the freezer, the meal that had become one of her recent food obsessions. "baby?" he calls to get her attention, failing to see the smile she cracked as her back was turned to her. she only hums in response as she continues to plate two burritos for herself. "i'm not gonna push you to tell me anything, but i just want you to know that whatever it is that's burdening you, it's something we can get through together. there's nothing that can possibly drive me away from you. i'm ready to listen whenever you're ready to tell me."

her moves falter a bit, but she regains her composure and continues preparing her breakfast. once the microwave beeped, she met him at the table, opting to eat as a way to get her thoughts together, his words ringing through her head as she did so. when she was finished chewing her first few bites, she cleared her throat. "i'm pregnant," her voice held no emotion, so little that you wouldn't be able to tell her nervousness had it not been for her hands shaking as she held the fork midair.

"i-" he paused, not knowing exactly what to say. he was in shock. and, from the looks on her face, he knew that it couldn't be a pregnancy scare because it looked like this has been weighing her down for a while. he knew his reaction to this information would be contrary to his previous words, but he didn't expect it to be this serious. "are you sure it's mine?" he asks, breaking her heart. a huge part of him could believe she was pregnant; everything was starting to make sense from her weight gain to her overly emotional state, all the way down to her eating habitsㅡ he knew she absolutely hated burritos.

"there's nobody else, jake," her voice cracked as she offered him a small smile, the corners of her lips barely lifting as she did so. oh how comforting those words were to hear last night, but now they struck him in the worst ways possible. she looked at him, his expression unreadable as he stared directly through her each time she'd lift her eyes to check his gaze. the cat was already out of the bag, so what's the harm in emptying the mess it left behind? "and i... i want to keep it." he didn't know what to say. he didn't know what to do. and he didn't want to hurt her, but what about himself? he isn't a bad guy. it takes two to get knocked up but-

"i'm not ready to be a father," his words came out quietly, scared that hearing it himself would make the guilt he felt feel worse. and it did. the look on her face when she finally looked him in the eyes, if her glow was already dull, he'd taken it away. the words already did their damage, now he has to stay true to them. he got up from the table, hands shaky as he pushed the chair in without a word and he offers her an apologetic bow as if that could take everything back. "i'm sorry y/n." he didn't know what he expected. who would forgive a deadbeat anyways. she didn't say a word, opting to keep her head down in shame. she stayed that way, not even bothering to move even after she heard the door close behind him, announcing his genuine departure from the home.

-

y/n wasn't nearly as sad as she thought she'd be. chaewon was right, it would hurtㅡ and for a long time it did. "but once you feel okay, even for a second, everything will be okay," she told y/n. and that's what it was, after 2 months of tears, her brain shifted its focus from the pain of his absence to the changes her body was making. she noticed the small bump in which the baby was forming became more noticeable in her shirts. deciding to embrace this, she stopped wearing baggy clothes. and chaewon never failed to remind her how beautiful she looked whenever they'd go out. she noticed she started to gain weight, but it didn't make her upset.

instead of looking in the mirror with disgust, like she had done before she found out about her pregnancy, she spent her lonely nights smiling in the mirror as she rubbed her tummy. her earlier pregnancy symptoms started to lessen, and her eagerness to visit the doctors increased as she was always excited to look at her ultrasound. she no longer dealt with nausea, being able to feed both herself and the baby without fear of regurgitation, but she soon found that her stamina had also begun to change. she spent most of her off days homebound, as moving around too much could easily take her breath away.

"alright, ms.l/n," the doctor says, spreading the ultrasound gel onto y/n's tummy, the coolness giving her chills as its temperature mixed with the cold air that the air conditioner blew. "let's see how this little rascal is coming along, shall we?" doctor kim asks, moving the transducer around as real time images of the fetus started coming onto the screen. y/n tilts her head backwards to look at the screen, smiling at it.

"aww, it's got its thumb in its mouth," she cooed, putting on a happy pout to chaewon who was indulging in the screen as well. taking her eyes off of it, she signaled the doctor's attention while y/n stayed in a daze, watching her baby as it minded its business in her tummy. "are we going to be able to tell it's gender soon?" chaewon asks, making the doctor nod in response. "how long will that be?" she adds on, making the doctor think about how far along y/n was by now.

"we should be able to tell in the next week or so, from what i'm seeing, if its a male, its genitals haven't developed yet, so we'll have to wait to see if any more developments, in that sense, occur," doctor kim says, moving the transducer more around the head area. "we'll have to develop the photos before you leave, miss l/n."

"oh, please, doctor!" y/n exclaims excitedly as she continued to watch the screen. "oh my room is gonna be filled with framed pictures of these!" she claps, making the other two girls in the room smile at her joy. it was a huge change in attitude from what they'd seen just five months before. clapping her hands together, doctor kim begins to clean up the gel and transducer, putting the items away as she begins the printing process for the ultrasound pictures.

once chaewon and y/n left, they decided to go to the store to get more groceries. "i want fruit roll ups," y/n said as she looked at the aisle signs, searching for the one that displayed where the snacks were. once she spotted it, she dragged chaewon, who was holding the cart, directly to the aisle. chaewon could only giggle at her friend with the roll of her eyes. "we gotta get some healthy snacks too, love. how about some nature valley bars?"

"i don't know..." y/n responded. "i just want something sweet and chewy right now, but i could go for some dorito chips right now if you want me to eat something crunchy," she says, mouth watering at the idea of it. "nope. nope, nope, nope, nope," chaewon says, grabbing y/n's hand while she used the other one to steer out of the unhealthy aisle that they'd already stepped foot in. "we're not feeding your baby that junk, let's just stick to fruits, okay?"

y/n grumbles a complaint under her breath, but she complies as they go to the produce aisle. "let's get chocolate syrup, too. for the strawberries," she begged, which chaewon mindlessly nodded to at this point, being too busy putting boxes of berries into the cart. "then go get 'em," she says, shooing the unoccupied girl. y/n nodded as she walked over to the isle where it'd be held. she hummed a nameless tune as she looked around for the brand she wanted. picking up two different bottles, she pouted in thought, turning her head back and forth from them.

hearing a groan out of nowhere, with a familiar base in the voice, she scrunches her eyebrows and turns to where it came from. her heartbeat picked up as a distracted and frustrated jake came into her view, only around 5 feet away from her. just then, she felt a sting in her stomach. "fuck," she cursed to herself. the baby was kicking. she, with shaky hands, quickly threw one of the chocolate bottles back onto the shelf as she waddled away as quickly as possible. it had been so long since she felt the rush jake gave her. she was no longer mad at him because of what he did to her, but she was still pissed off at what he didn't and wouldn't do for their baby. "were you kicking me because you couldn't kick daddy?" she cooed rubbing her stomach as she saw chaewon rolling over to her.

"what about the baby's daddy?" chaewon asked as they began walking side by side. y/n snarled. he really doesn't deserve to be called that. she thought. but she quickly returned to her normal friendly gaze as soon as she met chaewon's eyes. "we, well i saw jaeyun in the syrup aisle, and the baby started kicking me. i think he did it because he couldn't kick him."

"he?"

"huh? oh yeah. i've got a feeling he's a boy, my girl wouldn't use me as her punching bag," she joked as she rubbed where the baby was adamant on kicking about. chaewon smiled at the sight, moving the girl's hand to replace it with her own. it almost brought her to tears as they got into the shortest line. after they'd finished paying and packing the groceries up, they were on their way back to y/n's home.

chaewon shared side glances at the girl while she sang along happily to the tunes that were blasting on the radio. she was starting to realize just how real this was and how far y/n had gotten over the course of this half year. "you're gonna be an amazing mother, you know that?" she says catching y/n by surprise as she stops mid lyric. the radio's volume didn't change, but the world went silent and everything seemed to come to a complete pause as y/n's lips trembled into a small smile, eyes watering as she did so.

in the past six months of her developing pregnancy, she was never told this. of course chaewon has always praised her for her strength, and her parents had offered support though they were disappointed, nobody has ever told her that she'd be a good mother. and, though it's something most mothers would look over, it meant the world to her because she felt like she would be anything but. she didn't realize how long she'd been crying until she no longer felt the car moving as chaewon pat her on the back in a comforting manner. "shh, it's okay. it's okay.. i promise you will be," she says, making the girl's tears pour faster.

"thank you so much," she cried out, allowing her body to milk the tears as she regulated her breathing. "i don't know why that made me cry so much, i think it's been something i've been needing to hear for a long time, you know?" she admitted, sniffling a bit. chaewon nodded, but didn't speak. she realized y/n probably wanted to say more. and she was right. "it's just.. without jake, i didn't think i could do it. i was so ashamed that he didn't want us, i thought that i would end up not wanting the baby, too. but i kept it because i knew that it deserved a chance. and i've been doubtful about my abilities as a mother, thinking i'm not good enough. but hearing that made all of this worth it, i have to be a good mother to it."

"i know, baby," chaewon said, kissing the top of her head. "now let's get you home, okay?" y/n nodded as chaewon restarted the car and finished their journey back to y/n's place. after unpacking the groceries, they spent the rest of that night cuddling while watching a movie on netflix.

-

walking into the store alone, y/n talked to chaewon, who was resting, through one bluetooth headphone in her ear. "do you really think it was a good idea to leave the gender a surprise?" she asks as she pushes the cart aimlessly around the maternity area in target. "mhm.. yeah. no yeah, you're right. well, anyways i'm just at target right now, about to buy some new jeans cause these mom ones are getting too tight... i know! it's ironic. well, i'm not gonna hold you up, you should finish working. okay, bye bye. love you, too." once the call ends, she goes to pick up some jeans. as soon as she finished picking out a pair or two, she rolled her way into the snacking aisle. a part of her was relieved that her stomach wasn't too big for her to be able to push the cart, she enjoyed being alone lately, even though she knew it wouldn't last very long as she only had 14 more weeks to go, and things would only get more difficult then.

picking up two boxes of granola bars, she hummed quietly as her head turned back and forth between the two items. she wondered which one to buy, they were both a personal favorite to her, but she wasn't looking to spend hundreds again, she still hadn't bought a bulk of the baby clothes yet since she didn't exactly know what to buy other than an excessive amount of zoo themed oneㅡ because there's nothing more gender neutral for babies than animal themed clothing. it had only been a mere seconds that she'd been so lost in her decision that she didn't even notice that particular set of eyes that were set on her, guilt building up and rushing through his veins as he stood there frozen in his spot.

jake was carrying a handheld basket. he figured he'd only needed to come to pick up some protein bars and energy drinks, he didn't need a cart. well, now he was regretting it as his grip faltered on the basket making it fall down onto the floor, items flying anywhere they pleased. luckily the boxes only slid a few feet in front of him. however, the protein shake rolled into forbidden territory, that forbidden territory being the area where she stood. his eyes widened and his head lowered as she turned her attention to the protein shake, then to him. he did his best to stall picking up the boxes as he did what he could to avoid looking at her. his hands shook as her shoes appeared in his vision.

"you dropped this, sir," she says. she had a smile on her face, the most beautiful one that he would have been crushed to see drop as soon as they made eye contact, but it did. "oh," was all she could say as he got up, gripping his basket harder as they made eye contact for the first time in a little over half a year. "oh," he responds, his eyes flickering to her stomach. a sudden punch of grief and regret hit him directly in his heart as it seemed to clench with pain. he averted his eyes and looked back into hers, but, again, he wished he hadn't. the tears were already brimming. "oh, oh. no, please don't cry. i'm sorry. please don't cry, please."

"i'm sorry. i'm just so happy to see you," her frown worsened as she squeezes her eyes shut, sobs escaping through her closed mouth while her body only shook as her arms stayed glued to her side. "shit, y/n. don't say that, please," he didn't know what to do. his eyes watered as he hesitated before pulling her in his embrace, the basket long forgotten as it fell back to the floor with a thud. he thought a hug would help, but it just hurt the both of them more. he was warm, exactly like she remembered. she wanted to be closer, to feel more of him but her stomach only allowed him to hold her so much. he felt her belly pressed against his, and it was foreign because it's nothing like the last time he held her and it was just a painful reminder of why he felt so shitty to begin with. "i'm sorry," he says, pulling back all too soon for the both of their liking. "we should leave, i don't want you crying in a target."

he grabs her hand, gently dragging her along as they walked out of the building. "i don't have a car, i ubered here," she says as she tries to keep up with his quickened steps. he nods in acknowledgement, not turning his head to her as he was too scared to look at her again. "i know, baby. we're gonna go in mine." now she was kinda glad he didn't look back at her, because her face had contorted into both a smile and a frown. she was still his baby after all this time, even if he didn't deserve it. once they reached the said vehicle, he opened the door for her, helping her get in as she couldn't climb in as swiftly as she used to due to the big changes in her body. it was kinda cute, the way she needed his help. it made him reminisce the moments that could've been. the times they could've had together if he didn't panic. brushing his thoughts aside, he got in on the driver's side as he began making his way to her place.

after they'd gotten in the house, he had the pleasure of seeing the changes made. in the kitchen, there was a green high chair with leaves scattered on it. when they walked into the living room, there was a fluffed carpet with the abc's accompanied with pictures of animals corresponding to the beginning letter. they walked into her bedroom whose walls were littered with pictures of every ultrasound, the growth of the child becoming more apparent as it continued. everything has changed. and jake wasn't here to experience any of it. he wasn't there to help her through any of it. and he felt so terrible for it.

"wow," was all he could say as he stared at the ultrasounds. she'd long been sitting on the bed, watching him. she had always wondered how she would feel when seeing him again. she wondered how he'd look physically, how he'd look at her, anything. she wondered if she would be angry. she promised herself she'd be angry, that she would lash out at him and spew all the hatred that had manifested these past seven months. but she wasn't angry. and she didn't lash out because.. she didn't want to. she was so happy to see him. and to see how he still cared for her, it healed the wounds that he had left behindㅡ most of them anyways. the room grew terribly quiet as the atmosphere began to suffocate them, engulfing them in the gloom that jake emitted into the air. he let out a shaky breath, his shoulders heaving up and down as his sobs only seemed to elevate in volume.

y/n's eyes widened as she used her step stool to get down from the bed and walk over to him, wrapping her arms around whatever her body could allow her to. he was crying. every single emotion he had pushed down was starting to tear its way through his eyes, lungs, and mouth as he buried his face inside his hands. tears, snots, and spit pooled in the palm of his hands but he didn't care. he wanted to allow himself to feel. but he felt so guilty. he didn't deserve to be comforted by her. cause god knows who was there to comfort her. "i'm sorry. fuck i'm so sorry y/n. i never wanted to leave you. i was just so scared. i was already scared to ruin our relationship. and then you told me and i freaked out. i changed my mind as soon as i walked out but i was so scared to come back because that would be so shitty, but i thought about you every single day. i want to be in the baby's life. i want to be in your life. i'll do anything to fix things. i can't keep living like this. you deserve to be taken care of, both of you. and i want to be the one to care for you."

his words touched every inch of her body, from the top of her head to way beyond her toes. she didn't even realize she was crying until it suddenly became harder to breathe in her nose, the airways being blocked by a sudden stuffiness. she let go of him, going to wipe her own tears off as he wiped his hands off. "y/n? are you okay?" he asked as she finally looked into his reddened eyes. "i waited so long for you to say those words to me. i'm so overwhelmed and happy, jaeyun. please don't leave me again," she begged, grabbing a fistful of his shirt. he didn't even get to respond as he felt her lips graze his. their tears slipped through their lips as the kiss continued. he cupped her face, bringing her impossibly closer as he tried not to apply too much pressure to her stomach. the two of them walked over to the bed, he helped her get up onto the bed where they would lay for the rest of the day.

-

"when does your lease end?" jake asks y/n as he pours himself a bowl of cereal. she shrugs, taking a bite out of her burrito. she tries her best to think about the date she'd need to renew it. "some time at the end of this month, why?"

"i want you to move in with me," he says, making her choke on her food. she coughs up the remaining pieces out of her throat as she drinks water to calm down the new burning sensation. "well, my lease ends in two weeks. i've been saving up money so we can have enough for a down payment on a better apartment. what do you think about that?" he asks, sitting across from her. she was frozen, chewing her new bite from the burrito more than it needed to be. this was all so sudden. sure, she had wanted this for a long time, but she didn't think it would happen even in her wildest dreams. it just all felt so unreal. "am i overwhelming you?" he sighed.

"no," she said after swallowing the food. "i'm just- i don't know. i just.. think there's levels to this and this is skipping a lot of them," she says. he purses his lips and thinks about it for a second before nodding in agreement. "you're right. but i think it should be fine because it's what i would've done anyways. this is making up for lost time. i have to step up as a father, and this is what fathers are supposed to do," he says. "look," pulling out his phone, he opens safari and slides his phone over to her. she looks at the screen. it was an apartment with a lovely view of the city. "only a 15 minute drive from the university and it's close to a lot of the businesses in the area. i could get it now, or we can go and do a tour and-”

"you'd really want to move in with me?" she asked, looking up from the phone. he tilted his head to the side at her. insecurities were apparent, making him realize she was still wary of the whole situation. understandably, he smiles at her with his eyes and nods his head. "of course, baby. we're making a family together. i think living together makes more sense," her posture relaxes as she smiles slightly. a family, huh? she looks through the pictures more: 3 beds, 2 baths. would he want to make more with her? there's so many 2 bedroom apartments in the same area, why not choose those? she wanted to ask him, but everything was happening too soon. and she didn't even tell chaewon that she allowed the boy back into her life yet. "i think it's fine," she says, sliding the phone back over to him. "this is good. i have no idea how i could possibly fit all of everything that i wanted to give the baby into this small apartment anyways."

"okay, then. you can say hello to our new home," he exclaims as he puts his phone in his pocket. "i gotta get to work soon, so i'll be off before your last class ends. i'll pick you up then?" he finishes off the rest of his cereal, sliding the bowl, with its sugary milk, over to her.

"oh," y/n says as she looks down at the gesture, taking the spoon out as she silently sips on the liquid before talking again as if she were embarrassed to continue her sentence. "i actually am doing the online learning course, i figured it'd give me more time to tend to the baby." even with the small laugh she let out, it was evident that she wasn't happy like, the gesture was meant to be. jake nods his head as he gets up.

"then i'll come back with some dinner, let me know what you're craving before 8:30," he says, checking his pockets for his keys. while walking out of the kitchen, he takes one last glance at her before letting out a breath and leaving. y/n stays there for a while as she lets the silence engulf her. there were always so many things to think about when she was alone these days, but today the one thing on her mind was chaewon and what exactly she was going to tell chaewon.

a big part of her wasn't ready to talk about jake yet as she wasn't completely sure if she was dreaming or not, but the other part knew better than to doubt anything that happened to her anymore. and it knew she would have to tell chaewon one way or another. even if she didn't owe it to her, she felt like she deserved to know because she was there for her every step of the way. having jake would take this burden off of her shoulders, but y/n was immensely afraid that chaewon would be disappointed in her. how weak was she as a mother to take back the same man who turned his back on their child? very weak. but she wanted nothing more than for her child to be brought up in a warm and loving family with both of its parents because she believed that jake and she would be good ones, regardless of his initial response when he learned of the pregnancy.

"okay," y/n says as she finally gets up. "clean up first, tell chaewon after," she grabs the plates bowl, and utensils from the table as she walked over to the sink. one by one, she rinses the dishes off, one time, two times, three times before she opens the dishwasher to put them inside. she wanted to manually wash, but it would be putting too much pressure on the front of her stomach from having to reach over the sink for that long, so she reluctantly used the machine. after she finished that, she got the broom and began sweeping the floor. being too lazy to mop, she resorted to sweeping the living up as she did what she could to slow time down. but doing chores wasn't easy with her stamina, so after around 20 minutes of stalling, she decided to plop down on the couch and text her friend.

upon receiving y/n's message chaewon raises an eyebrow, but types out a reply nonetheless. she figured it was something important or something that was bothering because usually y/n would call. as she made her way to the car, she let her unspoken anxiousness run rampant through her mind about what could possibly be bothering her friend. while y/n stared at chaewon's notification, all that could be heard in the silent living room was the tapping of y/n's foot. she clicked her phone off, taking a deep breath as she waited for a few minutes.

telling chaewon about the situation proved to be easier than y/n's doubts had originally convinced her it would be. of course, chaewon's expressions showed hesitance for the whole ordeal, but at the end of the day she knew it wasn't her choice to make. and even though she wanted to beg her not to let him come back so easily, she offered her hand in support. and jake proved to be thankful; the day they all decided to meet up at y/n and jake's new shared apartment for some final touches, he conveyed his gratitude to chaewon. he thanked her for everything in the book that he could think of, especially for taking care of her in place of him and for staying by her side through it all.

"you know," jake said to chaewon as they looked at y/n's sleeping figure on the bed. she'd gotten tired after her day of fun with them. she'd just knocked out mid laughter, resulting in her innocent slumber while the other two conversed. "it's times like this where i wish i stayed. most guys, when they find out their girl is pregnant, just run off and marry her before the bump even starts showing, but me? i ran off like a deadbeat and hid in my bedroom scared. i should've been a man and stepped up to be a father sooner. you know, i saw her again, like- pregnant at a target. just shopping alone. i know how people think out here, i saw how people were looking at her before i came to her side. i can't imagine how much she had to endure before then. i feel so guilty. like i don't deserve to be here."

chaewon listened intently to his words, seeing the way he teared up over it. she hesitantly reached out to hold her hand on top of his, that action alone feeling like betrayal as he stiffened upon her touch, but she only wanted to comfort him. she swallowed before she spoke. "it's too late to change the past, you're here now."

"yeah. i suppose you're right," he removes his hand from hers as he nods and she didn't know why it upset her as much as it did. clearing her throat, she got up from the bed. "i should go now, right? it's late and i have class tomorrow," she smiles softly patting her pants to smoothen them. jake nods and gets up as well as he says "i'll walk you to the door."

"oh! that's not necessary," chaewon shakes her head, but he insists as he follows her to the door.

"i have to lock you out, so either way i have to come out here," he says, making her mentally face palm at herself. she'd read too much into the situation of course. it was silent as she walked out the door, turning around with her hands clasped together. jake raises an eyebrow silently. "hm?"

"her due date is coming soon. i'm going to step down from being her main support from now on. i want to prioritize my life now, so please fulfill that empty spot for me," she says, walking away before he could muster up a reply.

-

y/n's screams of pain filled the room as the doctors did everything in their power to talk her through the birth. her grip on jake's hand was painful, but he endured it because she was probably feeling worse than he was.

"that's it, ms.l/n, we can see the baby's head poking through now, just keep pushing, keep breathing," doctor kim says, but nothing registers to y/n as she keeps her eyes squeezed shut, tears flowing down her face as she sobs out.

"chaewon!! chaewon-ah, it hurts s-so bad," she brings her free hand to cover her eyes, wiping what she could. jake stays silent, only offering her a chaste kiss on top of her head, then on one of her tear stained cheeks. he couldn't be upset in a moment like this. right now, all he wanted to do was comfort her until this passed through.

"almost there and .... it's a boy!" hearing her son's cries fill the air was the first thing to bring her back to life. her soul felt like it was floating outside of her body until that point, but hearing the first sounds he's been able to make since leaving her womb, pulled her all the way back in. and feeling him in her arms for the first time made all of the pain and hardships she faced worth it. "jaemin," she whispered to the baby boy, whose cries seemed to subside once he felt his mother's touch. "you'll take the 'jae' from your father," jake's ears perked up as soon as he heard it. "look jaeyun," she turned to him with a smile. he looked down to see their baby, sleepily cooing while they both looked at him with nothing but adoration in their eyes.

"he's beautiful," was all jake could think to say. and it was true, jaemin was beautiful. even though he was covered in gunk and y/n's blood, he was beautiful. doctor kim watched silently for a few minutes before she felt it was alright to take jaemin away to wash him up.

"don't worry, i will bring him back to you after you all get your deserved rest, it was a long 15 hours, but you did it!"

"mhm, i sure did do it," y/n said, her eyes fluttering while she tried her best to stay awake during her tired state. after the doctor left with jaemin, jake wasn't sure of what to do. he scratched the back of his neck, sitting down in a chair while y/n closed her eyes. the room was a comfortable silence at that point, y/n's small breaths bringing the calm to a maximum. "jake?" she whispered, not thinking to speak louder through her drowsiness as jake looked up from his phone over to her. "yeah?"

"can you please sleep with me?"

his heart raced as he looked at her.

"yeah."

-

"that's a good boy, that's a good boy," jake tickled jaemin's stomach as the 4 month old baby boy cooed, using his small hands in an attempt to grab at his father's.

"he's not a dog jake," chaewon giggled as she watched the two boys. she sat on the couch next to y/n who was lying down, her back facing the group.

"hey, babies can be good boys too," jake argued in his baby voice, his attention still being on the baby he was rocking slightly in his arms

"that's fair," chaewon agreed, rubbing her stomach upon its sudden growling. "you guys hungry?" she asked, opening up her phone to ubereats.

"eh, i could eat," by now jake had gotten bored of standing up, instead he sat down with jaemin whose head was now being held up by the crease in jake's elbow while he sat at a respectable distance from chaewon.

"me too," chaewon says as she scrolls through the tabs on the app, being pulled in by all the food options that it offered. she hummed and slightly turned her head over to y/n who only remained silent, eyes focused on the closed curtains of their living room window. "how about you, y/n?"

letting her eyes focus on multiple spots of the room in front of her, it almost felt like she was searching her surroundings for an answer. but there was none. "i'm not hungry," she finally chose to respond before it was too obvious that she was still avoiding speaking.

"aw c'mon since when are you not hungry? you should be taking advantage of being able to eat whatever you want now that jaemin's outside of your body!" chaewon says, lightly nudging her friend's body, though the girl still didn't respond.

"well..." jake's voice suddenly piped into the conversation. "she's breastfeeding, so she still has to be cautious of the nutrients and junk she gets. can't have our baby being unhealthy, now can we?"

now it was jake's turn to be nudged. "aw c'mon, he'll be fine with a little tacos in his baby system! i'll order some now, matter of fact," chaewon said as she typed in 'tacos' in the app's search bar.

"alright, but none of that taco bell, we need the organics."

"well you're not gonna find that in korea.."

"fair enough," jake says as he gets up from his seat on the couch. "let's just go get some. y/n needs some alone time with jaemin anyways, we've basically stolen him away from her. isn't that right, baby?" he says, booping the boy's nose. he walks over to y/n, gently moving her shoulder in a way that would lay her on her back. she closed her eyes, not wanting to look at him as he placed jaemin on her, a heavy feeling forming in her stomach. he pouts, sympathizing with her tiredness as he places a kiss on both her and jaemin's head. "we'll be back," he says as he and chaewon quietly head out.

she only opens her eyes after she hears the door shut and lock. looking down, she sees jaemin fighting sleep as he is so at peace with her warmth, and it's only then that she's brought back to reality. the guilty feeling she would always get once she would hold him would come back again and she begins to ask herself why she was feeling the way she was.

carefully, she maneuvers herself so that she can hold him properly in her arms with a sigh. "god damn it, jaemin. why am i like this? i don't hate you, i know i don't. but why does it feel like this sometimes?" his lack of understanding towards her words makes her feel a little better, he dribbles and gives her a gummy as she kisses the top of his head. "i'm sorry, baby. i don't like feeling like i can only love you when it's just the two of us alone. this isn't how a mother should feel. you deserve better than me." closing her eyes, she slightly sways her body to become a human rocking chair to soothe him more than her warmth could do on its own.

"can you believe it's only been four months since he's been born?" although jaemin was nearing half a year of being with them now, jake already loved the boy enough to be able to talk about him nonstop for hours on end. he even went back to work early just to be able to brag about how healthy and strong his son would turn out to be. there'd even be nights where he and y/n would sleep with jaemin, and she'd wake up to see him have his back facing her, while jaemin would be carefully cuddled up to him on the other side. it was no secret that he loved his baby so much at times it'd be suffocating, for y/n at least. even when their parents came over to visit, they'd joke and say he must have been the one to give birth to jaemin instead of y/n.

even now, as the couple lay in bed, it felt awkward for jake not to have jaemin with them. it had been a mutual decision of theirs to have him sleep in his crib as sleeping in between two very active sleepers could potentially be dangerous. even now as they both faced each other, faces being dimly lit by their tv, his mind seemed to stay focused on the baby who was asleep in the next room as the smile on his face never faltered. y/n looked into his eyes, smiling back. she felt at ease being able to be so close with him without having to worry about keeping distance between their bodies for the sake of jaemin. it was refreshing. but she thought it'd be better if he would shift his focus to her, even if it was just for tonight. after these four long months of neglect, it's the least he could do for her.

yet, somehow his conversation regarding the boy never seemed to end. so, taking matters into her own hands, he put a finger to his lips, giggling as he finally grew silent. "you have work in the morning. sleep," she says, and he nods, the smile on his face staying the same.

"i must be keeping you awake huh?"

y/n hummed in response, using her thumbs to gently caress his face as he melted into her touch. "okay, then let's sleep," he said, gently removing himself from her hold so that he was laying on his back as sleep seemed to come over him quickly. she guessed it was easier to tire when it came to her. she turned her back to face him as she reminisced the days he would stay up and talk to her. she so naively thought that moving in together would bring them closer; it wouldn't be surprising if she woke up to an empty spot in the bed when she'd wake up later.

-

"i'm happy you're here, but you shouldn't have switched to online classes just to be able to see me everyday," y/n said as she changed jaemin's diaper, the boy kicking his chubby feet at her in protest to the cold baby wipe she swiped on his bum as she attempted to rid him of his potty mess.

"oh please," chaewon says as she waves a ringing teddy bear in front of the baby's face to offer a distraction for y/n to finish more smoothly. "going in person was only fun because you were there, plus i love that i have more time to see my best friend and my beautiful nephew!"

"he is beautiful, isn't he?" she said as she put the boy in his diaper, his hiss of fits finally coming to an end as she rocked him back and forth in her arms. "he looks so much like his daddy, too."

"well, i see the both of you in him," chaewon says, laying on her shoulder with a content sigh. "it's so crazy how much he's matured since he came back. i honestly held a grudge against him, but now i think you caught the stars with him. he's an amazing father," chaewon finishes, raising an eyebrow when she hears a small sigh coming from her friend. "what's wrong?"

y/n's complaint is simple. when chaewon asks her, she admits, "he's a good father, and he takes such good care of jaemin, of course, but i just wish he'd take care of me too, you know? he used to have real life feelings for me, now it just feels like i'm nothing more than a mother to him, now that he's a father." she prayed to god that she didn't sound jealous of her own baby. how pathetic that would be of her.

"baby... i'm sure this is just a first time parent thing. he's excited about the baby you guys made. i would be too, i mean, look at him! he's adorable," her eyes scan the baby's features, smiling softly at the sight before her. "don't forget what you feel for him too, though, okay? you love jaemin that much too, right?" it was something y/n never thought about. deep down she knew she had to love jaemin. she knew somewhere inside her heart that she adored him, and there were even times where she wanted to spend every waking moment with him, but she wasn't happy. or at least not in the way she thought she would be.

when she was first pregnant with jaemin, all she could ever think about was how badly she wanted to hold him. how badly she wanted to meet him and love him the way she knew best, but nothing she ever did with him felt like the magic she wanted. if anything, she was pretty miserable all the time. all the responsibility was pushed onto her, nobody else dealt with his crying, nobody else fed him, changed his diaper, anything. everyone got the luxuries of being around him while she did all the work.

she hated it, but that's what she was supposed to do, isn't it? she was supposed to care for her child while jake went to work to make sure they all got fed & taken care of. she couldn't possibly expect chaewon to pitch in, it wasn't her child. but she felt lonely, and even though it hurt her physically, mentally, emotionally, she couldn't just stop taking care of the boy. he was her responsibility. no matter what she did.

and she tried so hard to not direct those malice feelings towards him, but there's a big part in her brain that blames him. chaewon notices the silence and it tells her everything she knows. "a lot of things can happen to your emotions postpartum, y/n. there is help that you can get to get you through this. don't be mad at yourself for feeling sad, it's normal."

"yeah... i'm sorry. i just don't know how to cope with this stuff." chaewon shakes her head fondly and pulls the girl into a side hug, patting her back gently until she lets go again.

"don't be. i'll look into getting you help, but for now i'll look for temporary remedies." she smiles and kisses her cheek affectionately, pulling away once more before walking out of the room. "get some rest. we can talk more later, okay?"

y/n nods silently and watches her walk out of the room, deciding to put the baby to sleep in his room before she goes into her own to do the same.

chaewon's temporary remedy was one of the best gifts y/n could have ever wished for. it took some days, but she convinced jake to take y/n out on a proper date. after 4 months of solely focusing on raising the baby, the two of them are finally getting some alone time together. and y/n could not be any happier. he scheduled a shorter work day so they could go out sooner, and she spent the whole day getting ready. she had lost half of the baby weight, and due to the practices she followed to recover from the birth, her body looked almost the same as it had pre-pregnancy. she did her makeup as best as she could, threw on a matching velvet two-piece, and she even deep cleaned the house so it would look and smell good when he would arrive home.

when he came home, he barely had time to hug her and admire the way she looked as her hands were both already occupied. one hand held jaemin's sleepover bag, while the other held the sleepy baby in his car seat. raising his eyebrow, she only offered him a smile. "i'm ready whenever you are," she said, but he only laughed.

"i have to get ready too," he said, walking into the direction of the bedroom to do just that. the home was silent apart from the shower sounds as she sat on the couch. jaemin was in his cradle playing with the mobile that hung above his head. she didn't know exactly how much more patient she could be. now that she knew what the night had in store for her, she couldn't stop thinking about it; that made the wait so much more difficult to endure.

it felt like hours before jake came out of their room. his jet black hair was parted in the middle, partially slicked back on one side while his outfit consisted of a silk maroon button up with silk black pants and black loafers. her eyes couldn't help but widen as she looked at him. yep. they needed to leave fast. in the blink of an eye, she was carrying both jaemin and his bag, following closely behind jake as they walked to the car.

the drive was quiet as jaemin had fallen asleep in the back. jake's focus was on the road, while y/n's eyes were on him. after they dropped jaemin off at chaewon's place the plan was to go out to eat, but as they approached the highway that would lead to where the closest restaurants were, y/n started feeling a heavy feeling in her stomach.

"um, jake?" she says, lightly putting her hand on his shoulder. he turns his head slightly to glance at her before turning his attention back to the road. "how hungry are you? like hungry hungry, or just 'eh, i guess i could eat' kinda hungry?" she asks, making him cock and eyebrow.

"the second i guess, why? are you not hungry?" he asks, finally being able to turn to her when they hit a red light. she nods without saying anything. "not gonna lie, i went through hell getting that reservation. eating just a little won't hurt, right?"

"i'm sorry but my stomach hurts really bad..."

"y/n," jake says, pulling over to the side of the road so he could look at her while they spoke. "do you just not want to eat?" she doesn't speak back this time. he sighs, rubbing his temples as his other hand grips on the wheel. "fine. we don't have to go, i'm not doing this with you tonight," he says, his tone void of anything, but she could tell he was annoyed. he turns the car back on and pulls back onto the road, looking for the nearest place to turn around. this time, the quietness of the ride was uncomfortable. she didn't want to be in it, but she was afraid to speak; she wouldn't know what to say anyways.

instead of taking the route that would lead them home, he takes a turn that would lead to where they had come from: chaewon's house to which y/n begs him not to. "why are we going to chaewon's house?" she asks.

"we're picking jaem up?" he says like it's the most obvious answer.

"please no!" her voice was desperate, more desperate than he needed to hear. "it's just- i don't know when we'll ever get time like this again. i don't want to lose out. please."

"okay."

he takes a left, starting the journey to go their way home. his speed is faster than normal. she notices and doesn't like it, but she does her best to ignore it since she was getting what she wanted in the end. when they walked into their shared home, she was glad she cleaned up nicely because the atmosphere felt calmer than it would have been if the house was still a baby mess.

y/n thought she'd feel better, but her mood only worsens when she realizes jake still is upset. he goes over to the couch, flopping backwards onto it as he rested his head on the head of it. he unbuttons the first few buttons of his shirt with a sigh. she walks over to him with extreme caution, sitting next to him.

"are you alright?"

he just shrugs, mumbling under his breath, "this was pointless, if we were just gonna come back home." she purses her lips, biting back a frown.

"not completely pointless! it's nice to get a break from being a parent once in a while."

"for who?" he responds, "i have no problem being a parent, do you?" he turns to her, a look in his eyes daring her to say something. and it should make her intimidated, but for some reason it only blows her off the edge she was already doing her best to stay balanced on.

"would i be such a villain to say i do?!" she finally screams at him, the sudden change in volume catching him by surprise. "jesus christ, jake. i just don't get what's so special about him." her words spew a hatred she didn't know she could have at her own child and it angers jake more than any angry words could possibly explain.

"him? HIM?!? you mean our child?!?!"

y/n dodges the question as tears start to flow down her face. he looks at her in disbelief as he gets up from where he's sitting to walk away to create some space between them, but she only follows behind him, her built up frustrations finally clawing their way out her throat as she spoke. "all you care about is him; you're becoming nothing more than a dad, now and it's so. fucking. miserable!"

"well what the fuck do you want me to do, y/n?" he slams his fist against the wall, making her flinch. a split second of humanity was able to hit him again as he pinched his temples, a deep sigh being exhaled. "i'm not going back to being a deadbeat. i'm not going back to feeling burdened by my own decision. he's my son. our son."

"yes, jake. believe me. i know he's yours," she pauses, the lump forming an unbearable pain in her throat as she opens her mouth to speak again. "but am i?" she wanted to be strong. in all the scenarios where she had imagined she would be able to express her feelings, she was sure she'd be strong. it wasn't a phrase she had intentionally practiced for the hundreds of what-ifs her brain conjured, but it was the only sentence that could convey the hurt she had been feeling in her heart.

she cleared her throat, deciding not to let the silence last a second more. "aren't i supposed to be loved, too? don't i matter, too?" her attempt to keep her composure crumbled as she broke out into sobs. she knew it was supposed to hurt, but did it have to hurt this bad? she'd endured this feeling of unbelonging for such a long time, the least her heart could do was make it hurt less.

"y/n-" she hears him interrupt himself with a sigh as he walks towards her, pulling her into an embrace and resting his head on hers. he didn't know how to comfort her. there wasn't an easy way to put into words everything he felt for her, especially since it all came with emotions he didn't fully understand. "you matter so much to me. so fucking much, y/n. more than i can ever explain." he wrapped his arms around her tighter and she returned his affection, burying her head in his shoulder.

"please promise me that you mean it. please promise you won't forget about me " her voice wavered as she spoke, and he noticed how badly she was shaking. he wanted so badly to tell her how he felt, but he didn't know where he stood. they were never together. even if they both loved each other, it was never expressed because their situation didn't allow them to in the past. now things had changed, and he didn't know how they were gonna handle it.

"i promise." he whispered, hoping it would be enough.

she pulled away, wiping the tears from her face as she looked up at him. he gently smiled down at her, placing his hand on the side of her cheek, brushing her hair back from her face. she leans forward, wrapping her arms around him as she looked him in the eye. he smiled down at her, heart beating faster as he swallowed all his fears to express himself. "i love you, y/n, i'm sorry for pulling away instead of accepting it." the words caught her off guard, this was the first time he'd ever said such a thing to her. and it was better than she could've ever imagined.

tears spilled from her eyes as her lip quivered, she nodded understanding before pulling him into a kiss. she didn't know how long it'd been since they last kissed and it lasted only a second before she pulled away. "i love you too jake."

in an instant, his lips were back on hers, only pulling away long enough for him to look her in the eyes with a smirk as he asked "oh, do you?" their kiss grew sloppy as he lightly wrapped his hand around her neck, guiding her to the couch as he maneuvers himself so that he's sitting first. he pulls her on his lap, hands making their way to her waist as she grinded her hips against his growing erection, letting her tongue slip through his lips as he began sucking on it. he moved his hands up, fumbling with the zipper on her top before zipping it down fully. once he'd done that, she slipped out of it, her breasts falling down with a bounce before he latched his lips onto one of them, sucking slightly before releasing it with a loud pop.

there was no need to rush this time, they had the house all to themselves. their kiss lasted what felt like hours, only the sound of lips smacking and clothes rubbing against each other could be heard. jake pulls back for air, moving to unbutton his shirt. she only watches him intently wondering how he could make a simple action so, so sensual. he notices her stares and he likes it. his dick twitches and he realizes that, though the kissing and grinding is amazing, he wanted more. so much more.

"you gonna put those pretty lips to use or are we just gonna play around all night?" he asks making her eyes widen in excitement as she moves off of his lap to lay on the couch, unbuttoning and unzipping his pants before pulling them down to his mid thigh as she immediately latched her lips around the tip of his cock.

he sucks in a breath as she swirls her tongue around it, scooting down in his spot as he relaxed under her touch. "yeah, just like that," he praises as he pushes her head down so she can take in all of his length, fucking deeply into her mouth, not allowing her to come up even when she tapped on his thigh, gagging around him. "mmm, that's right." he finally let her come up to breathe, moving his hand to notify her that he wanted her to take control. she used the spit around his cock to her advantage as she let her mouth sink down until she felt his tip hit the back of her throat, doing her best to keep bobbing her head that way.

he hums and pats her butt, lifting her hip slightly to tell her to lift it more into the air. he does his best to pull her skirt off, letting her wiggle her way out of it, standing on her knees as he moves her panties to the side as he dipped his fingers into her wetness, adding two fingers. he sped up his thrusts, adding another finger as she kept going, teasingly stopping every time she would moan to the point of being inaudible. her legs started to shake as she resorted to only sucking the tip as she couldn't suck him any better with the way she couldn't stop moaning.

"get up and ride me," he tells her. she quickly obeys and inserts him inside of her, hopping up and down as she does her best to ride him, though her speed is slow. he smacks her ass, squeezing it harshly before spreading her cheeks apart. "good girl.. do you like making daddy feel good?" he asks as he grabs her chin and pulls her in for a kiss, this time letting it turn french. she moans into it, the lengths of his cock hitting her g-spot without fail every time she'd drop down. it made her speed and movement falter forcing him to grab her by her ass, lifting her body higher as he begins fucking into her, leaving her an absolute mess as she entangles her fingers into his hair breaking the kiss to moan in her ear.

"you feel so fucking good around me, but now's not the time to be a pillow princess," he again still praises as she tries to meet his thrusts. she has to take her hands out of his hair as she grips her nails into his shoulder, unable to fully process the pleasure her body was taking in. with the way her pussy clenched around him partnered with the pain from her fingernails digging into his skin, he couldn't help but be vocal about it. "you just wanna get pregnant again huh? you want me to fuck my seed into you again? you want me to reclaim this pussy? huh? you like that?"

squeezing her eyes shut, y/n just couldn't hold back anymore as she falls apart on top of him her first orgasm taking over all her senses, legs trembling from the feeling as she starts babbling between moans. he laughs as she rests her head on his shoulder, words still not forming correctly. "spit it out," he says as he slows his thrusts down ever so slightly so she could speak. she didn't know what came over her as she moaned out again, another orgasm hitting her as she came undone once again. she looks at him with a fucked out expression and says "faster."

his dick twitches as he complies, pounding deeper into her, feeling cocky, and only speeding up as he speaks praises into her ear. "you're so good to me, fuck y/n. you're gonna have to deal with me forever.. i'm not letting anyone even dream of having a chance with you. you're mine, all mine you understand?" she nods. "keep letting me fuck you like this and you're gonna be my wife sooner."

hearing this makes her moan louder as she smashes her lips on his, he keeps his speed, sometimes thrusting all the way in, staying there for a second too long for her liking, just to drive her crazy as she comes undone another time, finally making him start reaching his own pleasure limit. he doesn't change his speed or actions as he finally buries himself deep inside of her as he filled her with his hot seed. "you're mine," he says as she falls limp on top of him in exhaustion. she smiles and for the first time in months, she felt all the weight lifted off of her shoulders.

"all yours."

end.

[sensei-venus]

No Text No Call, Danger— (Husband!Miguel/Wife!Chubby!Reader/Wife!Sam)

Kinktober Day 5-Mommy/Daddy

(Unedited) (First Person/Told By Reader, Mommy/Daddy but not in a weird way, Rough Sex, Spanking, Eating Out, Creampie, Slight Breeding Kink, Reader scaring her husband & wife by thinking she got hurt, Over Protective Miguel & Sam, Punishment.)

The house was eerily silent as I walked in. I gently closed the front door before kicking my shoes off on the mat near the door. Sneaking around the corner of the living room I hoped that my husband and wife were still out.

The last week had been very stressful, between full-time school and not getting a minute alone. I just need some time to myself for once. Loving my wife and husband was great but that was a constant. But as of late with them doing work and school, our time together was cut as well. We only got to see each other at night. Most of the time before we all got into bed and passed out from the long hours of work and school. It we a sheared moment of utter stress for the group.

If I needed a minute to myself to get rid of some of the stress so be it.

That included me being able to go out on my own to a random college part with some friends from school.

“Look who decided to finally come home, after hours of no calls or texts.” a deep voice filled the air. My eyes widened, feet came to a full stop as I almost finished passing the threshold of the kitchen. Blinking I looked into the open kitchen. The light was on which helped to shine on the two figures that occupied the space. I gulped a little as I looked at a very mildly huffy Miguel. On the other side of the room sat a pouty Sam. Her hands lay in her lap, lips pulled into a sad pout. Her eyes were soft as she looked at me.

From just the way she stared at me I knew I was in deep shit.

“I'm sorry I should have called or even texted you. I should have let you know I wasn't going to be home until late-”

“Yes, you should have. You have been gone for hours now without a single word to us. Do you know how worried we were? How scared we were that something bad happened to you on your way home from class.” I stood quietly in the doorway listening to his words. They cut deep as I started to think about what he was really saying. He was right, we always sent texted or called each other after we got off work or school. It was out little safety measures with one another.

I just didn't realize how long I was gone. I didn't think about how bad the situation really looked. I just thought they would get the hint that I was taking some time alone when didn't text them.

If I looked at my phone right now I knew I would find a dozen missed texts from the two of them. Maybe even a couple missed calls while I was at it.

I felt a hard lump start to form in my throat the longer I looked at them.

Sam looked so upset like she was contemplating so much in her pretty head. I couldn't tell what exactly she was thinking but what ever it was, it was bad. Her pretty lips slowly pulled into a frown as she looked from me to Miguel. It was clear that the two of them had talked before I got home. For a moment they looked at each other. Almost like they were talking to one another just by staring at each other.

“Bedroom now.” was all that was said.

I dug my heals into the floor. I looked to Sam who slowly got up and made her way over to me. I felt that lump in my throat grow harder.

I quietly said “Sam I didn't mean to you know tha…”

“You hear him. I can't help you.” her voice was filled with a hint of sadness but also cold. She agreed with Miguel on this and it was starting to show. She pointed me down the hallway towards our bedroom. My head hung low as I slowly made my way toward the room, the other two following close behind me.

When we got inside Miguel went around me and sat down on our bed. He sat on the edge and Sam walked over to the other side of the room, sitting on a chair in the corner. I stood a little bit away from Miguel, his eyes hard as he looked at me. I could feel the way his gaze burned into me. My eyes briefly flickered over to Sam once again.

Miguel’s voice boomed once again from his spot on the bed “Come over here and get on my lap, ass up. You have to face your punishment for putting yourself in danger.” he slapped one of his knees to signal what to do. I felt my jaw clench a little at his words. I hadn't been in trouble for so long. Being punished was so rare that it practically never happened. I quickly strutted over and did what I was told. The small dress I was wearing did little to help cover me up as I laid down across his lap. I felt myself start to get warm all over from both embarrassment and shame. My finger dug into his pants leg as I leaned over his knees.

One of his large hands slowly trailed up my calf and up my thigh. Sweeping under the dress, palming at my ass cheeks. Suddenly I felt bad for wearing such revealing underwear that day. I had swapped out my regular panties for a nice little thong that wouldn't show under my dress. But it didn't seem like the best idea as his hand caressed my naked flesh.

Because I knew what was going to happen next.

 A moment later he was flipping my dress up so it bunched under me. It sat rolled up under my bust allowing a full view of my thighs, ass and full back. I chewed on my lip as I waited for him to make a move. I shivered as I felt him run a hand over my ass and back, moving up and down in gentle strokes. I whimper and look to Sam for some kind of support. I wanted to cry a little after seeing her expression. She still looked sad but I knew she would do nothing to try and help me after everything I had done.

I brought this punishment on myself.

I yelp at the first strike, it's not hard but it still has me flinching. Shock fills me as he lands another hit on my ass. He slaps me with more vigor the next time, a strong hit to my left cheek. A loud crack fills the room with each new hit. He focuses on my left cheek for a while. Ten whole slaps that only got harder and harder. With each passing second more pain fills me.

Then he returns to my right cheek witch just as much force. I'm yelping by now as the pain starts to bloom on my rear. I can't believe how hard he's slapping. I feel tears start to well up in my eyes as moments start to pass. Another loud wack fills the room and Thai one has me wiggling. Trying to get out of his grasp.

“Miguel I'm s—”

“No that's not what you call me right now. Do you want to get punished even more?” he says in a serious tone. I look up at him the best I can and shake my head.

“Im s-sorry Papi…”

“What was that Reader? Did you say something? I couldn't hear you.” he gives my ass another hard slap wish had me crying out.

“I'm sorry Papi!! I'm so sorry Papi please forgive me!” I scream out with another hit to my ass. My cheeks scream in pain. Every hit has hot searing pain going through me. My ass cheeks sting in the cool air of our room creating more pain. Tears roll down my cheeks ever so slowly. I whimper as I feel his hand slowly move over my tender cheeks. They burn under his touch like lava.

His voice is harsh “Tell Mommy how sorry you are. apologize for making her so worried about you. Tell her how instead of texting her you whereok that you decided to go to some stupid party instead.” he pulls my face up by the chin. I stare over at Sam who hasn't moved from her spot. This time her pants are missing. She's left only in a pair of thin pink panties. Her shirt is still on but I can see her nipples pebbling under the fabric. She just looks at me.

“Mommy I'm so sorry! I promise I won't do it again. I'll text you two the next time I go out like that. I'm sorry.” tears are still rolling down my cheeks as I look at her. Vision blurry as she gets up and walks forward. Her figure comes towards me until she stops right in front of me. My eyes widen and I yelp out loud. Miguel grabs me and throws me onto the bed. I try to roll over but I hiss out in pain from the sting of my fresh and raw ass. The fabric of the blanket has me rolling in pain. The bed dips in front of me and soon I'm met with Sam’s pretty trimmed pussy in my face.

It's a soft pink, she holds herself open as she spreads her legs. I'm only inches away from her pretty cunt. She wet, her hole dripping in need. It starts to make a mess on the bed sheets. Her tiny clit stands hard at attention, twitching a little as her hole flutters. It winks at me which has me drooling a little though my pain.

“How about you show Mommy how sorry you really are by eating her pussy out.” Miguel then shoved my face into our wives ready clunt.

I'm on all fours ass I slowly starting eating Sam out. She moans as she lays back, one of her hands tugging at my hair. I feel her nails dig ever so slightly into my scalp. I moan out as I lick up all of her juices. A mix of sweet and savory that fills all of my senses. My head is reeling as I gently suck at her warm folds.

Her soft skin eggs me on as I find her clit. Kitten licking it which had her shoving me harder into her creamy cunt. I suck on her like fresh hard candy. Spit slides down her already sopping bits and fully ruins the bed along with my chin.

Miguel’s hands are on my hips and then rub along my belly, playing with my soft rolls. I flinch a little as his hand runs over a sore part of my ass. Nealy brushed against one of his lash marks. It stings but he soon returns to my hips, grabbing them and pulling them towards him. I can't tell when but at some point he took off all of his clothes. I feel his hard dick rub against my thigh. It's thick and hot along my skin. I shiver when it prods over my crack then lower.

With no prep he lines his dick up and thrusts right into my slit. The moan that leaves my mouth goes right into Sam’s pussy making her squirm under my mouth. I try my best to keep up with her. Trying to focus on the sweet wet pussy that's in front of me and the hand that is gripping at my skull. Her fingers tightly wrapped in my hair guiding me on how she wanted me to please her.

Miguel didn't waste a minute as he started to relentlessly plow into me. My eyes roll back as he thrusts into me. He physically pushes me harder into Sam but she doesn't seem to care one bit. I moan deeper into her as Miguel hits a soft spot inside me. My walls are already spasminh as he jackhammers into my g spot. It's a direct hit every time he thrusts back into me. There is no rhythm to the way he pounds onto me.

The sound of his grunts fill the air and echo around our room.

I can hardly hear over the sound of my own moans and Sam’s sweet sounds. She's babbling on now but I can't understand what she's saying.

Brain utterly fogged by both pain and pleasure. The smell of my wife has my head reeling and my mind gone.

My ass burns and stings every time Miguel’s narrow hips met me. The sound of our flesh meeting is loud and sticky. Between sweat and fluids is a nasty mess between us. My breathing starts to get heavy, lungs burn for air. With what energy I had left all I could do was try my best to tongue fuck Sam. Her tight hole slowly started to open for me as I lapped at her walls. Her juices spilled down my chin.

Soon enough she was squealing and ripping at my hair. Bucking her hips against my face I felt her walls contract against my tongue. She bucked one last time before I felt it, a warm spray of liquid filled my mouth. I moaned as I felt her cum spray into my mouth. She went boneless under me.

I gently flicked my tongue at her clit to play with her. I couldn't breathe but I didn't care as my attention was pulled to Miguel again.

His hips dug into my ass as he trusted as deep and hard as he could. I could feel his muscular front against my back as he laid over me. His cock hit the very bottom of my pussy. Pushing at my cervix like a button. It felt so but but at the same time so bad. It was like he was trying to ram into my womb.

“Tell me you know what you did was wrong! Tell me right now! I won't let you cum until you tell me you know how bad you are!” he howls into my ear

“I know I was wrong! Papí I'm sorry! I'm sorry Mommy! I promise not to do it again! Please let me cum!” my pussy clenches. I can't hold on much longer. With the way he hammers into me it won't be long until I bust.

“Take this load! Cum for us! Now Reader!” he thrusts as deep as possible and sprays my insides with his hot cum. My whole body locks up and my vision goes white.

I couldn't tell how long we where there for.

When I came back to my senses I was no longer between the both of them. I was laid beside them both at the top of our bed. I could feel his seed leaking out of my puffy cunt. Dripping from my whole and into my ass crack, the bed fully ruined now. My ass was finally numb and could no longer feel the sing of Miguel’s punishment.

Sam played with my hair a little, gently messaging my scalp. She hummed a little as she did it and just looked at me. Her eyes where once again soft and loving. No longer filled with sadness or even a hint of pity for the punaihment her and Miguel gave me.

Kisses lingered over the other side of my Beck. Plush lips kissed along my collarbone up by the junction of my neck. Hot breath fanned over the air as he pulled away just a little bit.

“Don't worry amar, hopefully, one day soon we will make you into a real Mama. You took your punishment very well.”

A shiver went up my spine at his words. I felt hands wonder over my puggy stomach over so gently.

Deep down I hoped he was right.

[loving08]

I Love You

Aaron Hotchner x Y/N

Summary: Y/N has been working in the BAU for a year now, she is satisfied where she is along with her crush on her Boss Aaron Hotchner, but the entry of a new person would broke her or will she be able to be with man she love.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Epilogue

The next morning Hotch woke up to little clattering sounds around the house, he sits up quickly, wide awake but relaxed when he heard the sound of laughter and realized there is no danger. After Haley's death he had become more aware and protective over Jack. He just shook his head and gets up to freshen up.

He goes down stairs and towards the kitchen and lean onto the kitchen doorframe and looked at Y/N and Jack who didn't noticed his presence and were in their own world. He had a smile on his face and after a little while Y/N looked up and saw him at the doorframe looking at them, she shyly smiled at him and said "Hey, good morning", hearing her Jack turned his head and gave a big smile to Hotch and cheerly said "Good morning daddy, we made breakfast". Hotch walked up to them and said "Good morning to you both too, I see you have done great buddy" and kissed Jack's forehead. Jack smiled and said "I just helped a little daddy, Y/N is the one who actually made the breakfast".

Hotch looked up at Y/N and said "well then I should thank her then" and walked up to her. Y/N still smiling shyly said "ooh there's no need to thank me, I was just up and had nothing to do so I made breakfast for all of us". Hotch looked at her adorably and took a sit at the stool and Y/N gave the food to both the father-son duo and they all ate breakfast together. After finishing Y/N took their plates to wash despite Hotch protest. Hotch looked at Jack and said "Jack go get ready for school, Jessica will be here soon to pick you up". Jack just nodded his head and ran upstairs. Hotch stands up and goes towards Y/N and stand beside her and said "Thank you Y/N, for everything", Y/N looked up at him and gave him a small smile and said "no need to thank me Hotch really, I didn't did much okay it was just a little breakfast" and let out a small laugh.

"I'm not just talking about the breakfast, I'm thank you for everything that you have done for this whole year, for Jack and me, it has been a blessing for us , so thank you , thank you for coming into our lives", Y/N and Hotch looked at each other and they were so lost in each other eyes they didn't realized that someone was knocking on the door not until Hotch phone ranged and they both broke the eye contact, Hotch picked up his phone to look at the contact and realized Jessica must be at the door and he goes to the door and opened it for her all while Y/N eyes were on him.

Jessica comes inside and greets them both when Jack comes downstairs, ready and all. At the door Jack was saying his bye to Hotch and looked up at Y/N and said "you will come next time right for a sleep over, I really want to have a sleep over with you again". Y/N beamed up at him and crotched down to his height and took his hands and said "I will baby, I will come again and we will have a sleepover again, I promise okay, now c'mon give me a big hug and have good day at school". They both hug each other and bid goodbyes and Jessica and Jack left.

Y/N turned to Hotch and said "I'm sorry I didn't asked you before agreeing to another sleepover, I just... I wasn't able to say no to him when he looked so cute and hopeful while asking". Hotch let out a laugh and said "I know how hard it is to say no when he does that, and he also know how to make someone say yes, so I knew you will not be able to say no to that and It's not like I have any problem with it, I have always said it before and I will say it again you are always welcome here anytime, now let's go we also need to get ready and go we don't have much time left" and walked back to his room and if he had looked back at Y/N he would have seen her reddened cheeks, blushing after hearing his words.

They both get ready and left for work, reaching there Hotch parked his car and they both goes inside the BAU. Upon reaching there, they part ways and when Y/N goes to sit on her chair someone took hold of her hand and take her to the break room, she turned to the person and realized it was Spencer and looking at his face she knew what he was going to ask and said "nothing happened Spence, everything was normal okay", Spencer gave out a pout and said "I didn't even asked yet, how do you know what I'm going to ask??". "you don't need to ask for me to know what you want to know, your facial expression is enough to know what you are up to" and rolled her eyes at him fondly, she knows no matter how much she tried acting annoyed at him she will never be really angry at him, it was a fact.

"tsk something should have happen, I didn't just let you both go to not do anything" and shook his disappointedly. Y/N let out a sigh and said "there's nothing for it to happen Spence, Hotch just think of me as a co-worker or even friend but nothing more than that, let's just....just let it go okay" and walked out of the break room leaving Spencer behind. Everybody got to work and start doing the paper works and soon it was time for them to go to Rossi's mansion for their little party. Y/N was about to go to the lift when Hotch walked up to her and said "do you want me to drop you at your house and pick you up for the party?". Y/N shook her head and said "no it's okay actually, Spencer gonna pick me up for the party so I'm gonna take the ride with him, you don't have to come all the way to my house Hotch". Hotch just nodded at her and they both took the lift.

Reaching the garage they both noticed Beth with Spencer, reaching near them Y/N asked "hey Beth, you waiting for someone?". Beth just gave a tight smile to Y/N and turned towards Hotch, basically ignoring everything Y/N asked which didn't go unnoticed by the two male. Beth looked at Hotch with a big smile and said "Aaro..I mean sir can you give me a lift to my house, I didn't came with my car today so can you please drop me off and pick me up for the party too, I might get exhausted and don't wanna drive there, please sir" and looked hopefully at him. Hotch knows what actually happening here, it's not like Beth even tried to hide her feelings at all, he didn't had problem before but now it was starting to become one. He just sighed and looked towards Y/N, noticing her eyes at him and let out another sigh and said "okay I...I will give you a lift but I can't pick you up, my son and I need to spent some quality time so it will be better if you book yourself a cab or something", he knows it's a lame excuse but he didn't had any other idea. Beth nodded her dejectedly and goes towards his car knowing her plan failed of spending some alone time with him.

Hotch turned towards Y/N and Spencer, looked at Y/N and said "see you at the party then" and turned to walk to his car when he suddenly stopped and turned back to them and said "and...um.... I need to tell you something, so let's have talk there too" and then walked up to his car and drove off. Y/N and Spencer looked at each other and gave a look to one another and gets inside the car and they too drive out of the garage. On the way Y/N can sense that Spencer wants to say something and turned towards him and said "okay out with it, whatever you want to say just say it". Spencer looked at her a little then turned back to the road and said "I just want to say that I have a good feeling about this party, like something good and big going to happen but that might involve you...."and paused, "and Hotch right" said Y/N. Spencer just sighed and nodded his head at her. Y/N let out a long sigh and said "Spence I know what you mean but I just can't make myself think that Hotch might be feeling something for me, there's might and what ifs and I don't want to think of those things at all and now there's Beth who has feelings for Hotch and he might like her back....I.....just don't know what to feel anymore Spence, its getting so much hard, why do I have to fall for him, why not someone else, why didn't I fall for you rather than him" and let a single tear roll down her cheek.

Spencer parked outside her apartment building and totally turned towards her and said "it is how love works maybe, I have read in a book that quoted that there is no love if there is no pain, I don't know much about love Y/N but let me tell you one thing for sure, maybe right now even Hotch hasn't realized what he feels for you but I know he feels something for you, I'm not giving you any hopes I'm just telling you what I have seen, something is bound to happen Y/N I can feel it, we can just hope that its something good" and gently wiped her tears and teasingly said "and hey its really not too late to fall for me, you can you know, I can be more charming for you to say that, tell me Y/N do you really love Hotch or its me, hmmm?". Y/N let out a small laugh and smacked his shoulder and said "shut up idiot, I do love you just not in that way". They both laugh a little and Spencer let her know that he will pick her up in an hour and they bid goodbyes to each other.

[monikashinswife]

Hiiiiiiiii! So i love all your monika fanfics!!! Pls tell me there are still more to come!!!

But I would like to make a request for a fanfic of Hyowon 😭 pls im so deprived of her! Like the fem reader is an actress in hollywood but staying with Hyowon in korea and she goes on an instagram live and everyone is surprised. It also shows how sweet, caring, thoughtful and overprotective lip j is towards the reader.

Thank you so muuuuuch!!!

"The Korean"

(Lip J x Hollywood Actress! Reader)

・❥・time for our Sooni! been dropping few updates cause I think I'm gonna be inactive because school's starting again. Anygays, enjoy darlings!<3 Request inbox is open anytime<33 ⋆ ★

Flashes of the cameras and the overwhelming voices of the paparazzis triggers me, but like always. I have nothing to do. They are doing their job. But why is their job this horrible?

I understand that when you are a well known name. Paparazzis will follow, but doesn't make it less comfortable. They are still invading someone's personal space.

Fortunately, I got along with some of them. But it doesn't mean that this doesn't bother me. Just then, one of the paparazzi asked while I am walking towards the entrance of the airport.

"Where are you going? Are you gonna film another project?" He asked quickly. And I answered them robotically but still politely as I try to squeeze myself through many paparazzis.

I thank the guards for helping me. As much as I love being an actress. It's still very overwhelming especially now that I just finished another film that had me mentally challenged.

Going to South Korea would be my rest and escape. That country became my second home when Hyo Won took me there few years ago.

It became my home because it was hers. And because she is there.

I quickly became overwhelmed and noticed myself tearing up because of what just happened. I didn't know how I got to the plane but I'm glad I did. I sigh in relief as I look at the mesmerizing sight.

In order to distract myself I decided to read my book for a while. I was so immersed with the story that I forgot to message Sooni before we boarded. I figured that I'll do it when the plane landed.

I took some photos and continued reading the book that Hyo Won gave to me. I can already feel the stress leaving, I got so invested to the story that the flight felt like a few minutes.

Before I knew it, I'm already in Korea. I smiled as I walk to the airport with my suitcases and phone in hand. I decided to post some pics for my fans.

I continued walking after I posted, trying to find somewhere to eat before I messaged her that I'm already at the airport. But Sooni knows what time my arrival so she'd be here soon.

"Honey!" My head almost snapped because of how quickly I turned around when I heard her voice. "Sooni!" I giggled when I saw her running towards me. I immediately open my arms to be hugged by her.

"I missed you so much." I mumbled against her neck. She rubbed my back while kissing my hair. "I know, but you're here now." She comforted me softly. I nodded against her before parting our bodies.

"Let's go?" She urge softly when she noticed people recognizing us. I nodded and she helped me with my luggage. She drove us to her apartment, during the car ride, I was quite worried because of the silence.

It was comfortable yes, but my mind's making me think things. "Hey... you alright?" She must've noticed my internal battle. She put her free hand on my thigh, caressing it to bring comfort.

"Hmm?" I snap out of my thoughts to look at her concerned eyes for a moment. I hold her hand and bring it to my lips to assure her that I'm fine.

We reached her house. And she helped me get settled. She toured me around first, "where's the guest room honey?" I asked, I noticed her change of emotion.

"Here." She lead me to the room, opening the door for me. "Here's the guest room." I carefully watch her, noting how her voice suddenly sounded so distraught.

I chuckled before wrapping my arms around her neck. She tried to avoid my eyes by looking everywhere, "What's wrong?" she reluctantly turned to look at my doe eyes.

"It's just that-" she stopped herself, but I urge her by bringing my hand to cup her cheek. "I don't want you to sleep here." She hides her face in embarrassment.

"Just say you miss me." She tried to get away from me when I teased her. But before she could go anywhere, I hug her from the back.

"Stop~" annoyance can be heard in her voice, "Aigoo~ you baby" I make her turn around while my arms are still around hers. I missed this so much.

"I asked because I wanna know where I'll put my things." I explained and that made her loosen up before smiling widely.

"Ok!" She avoided me once again by taking care of my things. I laugh as I watch her set my things quickly and dragged me out of the guest room.

The entire day was spent really nicely, we cuddled on her couch and catch up on things and made plans for tomorrow.

I am laying on our shared bed, casually browsing through my phone. I knew that it was probably not a good idea to scroll through comments. But I did, I scroll to the comments on my latest post.

Luckily, it was all good. Fans are saying that they missed me already and and I thought it would be a good idea to go live for a quick update.

"Oh hi everyone." I wave my hand as I was trying to find a comfortable and nice position so I could record myself properly.

"How's everyone?" I read the comments, and they did not disappoint like always. They are so dear to me.

"Flight's good, some problems with going to the airport though." I updated them enthusiastically. I interacted with them. Joking and asking them things and vice versa.

"How's the korean?" I read out loud without thinking, I laughed as I realized the question. "It's been great." I answered carefully. I didn't even noticed Sooni entering the room. Not until she laid on top of me, her lower body on the bed and her arms wrapped around me.

She rested her chin on my chest while looking at me lovingly. Thinking that I'm talking to my friend. In instinct I played with her hair while reading the comments.

She adjusted and buried her face on my neck for a moment. I put the phone down when she reach for my lips. I cup her face our lips dance against each other passionately.

We made out, missing moments like this because it's really been a while. "Are you live?" She asked when we parted. I nodded and reached for my phone. The comments going wild because of our interaction.

"I'm screen recording"

"Did anyone heard the sounds? Or it's just me👀"

" the Korean is doing really great~"

We read the comments and look at each other with straight faces before bursting out of laughter. "That's gonna be my new nickname" Sooni said, shaking her head in fake sadness before burying her face on my neck again.

"My poor Sooni." I purred, teasing her. I constantly teased her during the live. We're both answering questions while Hyo Won is feeding me.

She casually fed me while I answered the questions that is directed to me enthusiastically. Hyo Won expresses her love through actions.

We took turns feeding each other, we talked with the fans. Even taking turn holding the camera, but when she noticed how it's hard to find a stable angle.

"Let me, love" she ask for the phone, then she took a tripod so it's less hassle. I am watching her endearingly as she sets up the phone.

Once it's done, she went back to her place. She's behind me. Her chin on my shoulder while her hands are wrap around me.

We continue the live like that. The fans took note of everything. For sure this would go big and some of them approving and accepting our relationship.

They were shocked because of the different sides of us are revealed. And they were the ones to witness it raw. They realize how both of us are being ourselves with each other and are happy that we are happy.

𓆩⟡𓆪𓆩⟡𓆪𓆩⟡𓆪𓆩⟡𓆪𓆩⟡𓆪𓆩⟡𓆪𓆩⟡𓆪𓆩⟡𓆪𓆩⟡𓆪𓆩⟡𓆪𓆩⟡𓆪𓆩⟡𓆪𓆩⟡𓆪

(not proofread and sorry for the ending. I am sleepy already)

[russellsppttemplates]

If you let me show you (Charles Leclerc)

Years later, your's and Charles' hearts are still longing for eachother and, perhaps, it was meant to be all along

Note: english is not my first language.

Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated, and while I'm not actively taking requests, I am writing some blurbs when I can so if you have any ideas or concepts that can be written in a small amount of sentences and you want to share, feel free to do so!

Tw: past breakup

"As usual, thank you for listening to the podcast", you began closing off the recording for you newest episode of your podcast, taking your headphones off once you were done and your editor gave you her thumbs up, "That was really good, Y/N. I think people will enjoy it a lot", she said as you smiled, proud of how far you got. The idea of creating your own podcast while you finished your degree was just something to keep your mind off of school, despite it being about what you studied since it was something you enjoyed, but it had quickly grown to join other people who, like you, enjoyed the topic. You had gathered a small community that you were very grateful for, especially when it allowed to go to bigger events like TedTalks and sit and talk, as well as meeting them.

Checking your phone for your e-mails, you noticed a new one from someone you had never received anything from before, "what is this...?", you muttered under your breath before letting your finger tap the screen to open it, revealing what looked like an invite to an event, looking at the top to see that you had been sent it a few days ago and, scrolling down, finding out that you had to confirm your attendance until that afternoon, "did you get this?", you showed it to your editor, "nope, but I've heard of other people who come here to record that they've been invited too", she smiled. "Are you plann-", she was interrupted by the sound of your phone ringing, an unknown number calling, "yes?", you said, "Hi, this is from Fondation Prince Albert II de Monaco. How have you been, Y/N?", a seemingly kind man on the other side of the line, "Hello, I've been good, and you?", you said as you looked at your editor, "sorry to bother you during the day, but we've had some issues with our communication channels and are not receiving the confirmation from the people who are attending, and we just wanted to confirm wether or not you are joining us for the evening", he said as you panicked opened the e-mail again, checking for more details about this event, "Oh, you're also allowed a plus one, I don't think your e-mail said that due to the glitch we had", he offered as you looked at your editor one last time, her showing you a dinner she had with family on that night, "yes, I can confirm my presence. Just me, no plus one", you said as you heard him type, "Good, thank you! Since our communication channels are not working properly, is it okay if, in case of any new information, I contact you through here?", he asked before you confirmed, bidding eachother a good day and goodbye before ending the call, "this is a very surreal thing", you heard your editor said, now propped by your laptop as she look at the e-mail, telling you all about why they had decided to invite you, your contribution to spreading scientific knowledge in a simple way and accessible to everyone bring the number one reason, "who knew, hm? My weird little podcast about academia getting me t-, oh, wait, this is a red carpet?", you looked further, noticing their dress code advice section, "what did you expect from the Fondation? Some burgers and fries?", she teased you, "I thought it was, like, an intimate thing, small thing. If I'm going to this, who else is?", you mused while your editor only snickered.

.

After having your friend help you pick a dress worthy of the event, you dropped it at the dry cleaners, which is where you found yourself in the morning of the event, ready to pick it up while the lovely lady went to get it outback when a younger employee asked "I'm sorry, but you are Y/N, from the podcast, right?", she asked as you nodded, "I've heard your voice through these so many times I recognised it almost immediately", she said as she pointed to her earbuds, "I'm very happy that you listen to it", you said as you noticed your dress, clean and ironed being set on the counter, "may I ask what this is for?", she said curiously before who you figured was her grandmother set the bill for you too, "dear, that's not nice for the costumers, sorry about my granddaughter", she half scolded her, "no, don't worry. I'm going to an event tonight because of the podcast", you explained as you paid, smiling before leaving the store and bidding goodbye.

Arriving at home, you tried your best to remember and replicate how Pascale taught you to do your hair, the curls coming out looking like you were from a different era, silently praying they would drop while you fid your makeup. You put one the dress and added your accessories before shaking your curls, moving to put on your shoes and coat just in time for the car they had sent to pick you up and go to the event, "is this your first time?", the driver asked, "yes. Do you notice it that much?", you giggled, "not at all. Just I know I would have recognised you otherwise", he explained, "do you know anyone who is going to be there? It is a big help, so I've heard over the years", he offered, "I don't think so", you mused, "I'm not sure who's invited to be honest", you giggled again, nervous that you should have done your research, "usually actresses and actors, singers too usually, people from non profits, other members of TV shows. Oh, and how could I forget, some drivers usually go too", and it hit you. How did it not hit you before? Charles could be there too, and you not seen him in person in the longest time. Last time you saw him was a few months after you broke up, and it pained you to be in the same room as him, and while you did nothing but be polite to eachother, you couldn't deal with that, somehow always managing to avoid any gathering where he would be. Did you watch his races? Yes, every weekend one had been on you'd take your time no watch it, never breaking your promise and supporting him whenever you could, however you could. Knowing how it would bother you stayed out of anything related to his personal life, only knowing little bits you picked up from interviews and, since he was pretty private, there hadn't been anything related to his relationships, so were you about to know something more? Was he bringing a plus one with him? "Don't need to get nervous, dear, from all my years of this, people are usually very friendly and before you know it, you're already friends", he smiled sweetly, oblivious to the actual relationship you were worried about.

A woman dressed in black guided you on what to to once you arrived, telling you when to stop and pose for some pictures, despite your insistence that 'I'm here for my voice, I don't think people will need to see my face really", giggling and comforting you until you felt comfortable enough, "See?! Stunning, chérie", she smiled before her phone beeped, prompting her to tell her colleague, "Charles is arriving just now, could you go to him, please?", before helping you to the other spot where you would do an interview with someone who also had a podcast that, despite being a bigger creator, treated you with the utmost kindness, "thank you so much for taking some time and giving us your story on getting to where you are today", he said as you shook his hand one last time, thanking him before walking back to the carpet, spotting Charles posing too. And then your heart started doing somersaults, almost like it never stopped doing then anyway.

Charles followed the woman in a black suit as she told him where to stand, smiling in almost all the directions someone called him from before he noticed you, sitting in a high chair with a pair of headphones on your head. Were you here? Your podcast was successful, he knew that much since he contributed, but he did not expect you to be here. How long had it been? Two, maybe three years? You had managed to go to his F2 celebration, just as friends, before, as he now recalled, never setting his eyes on you in another form other than pictures on Instagram or your voice from the podcast episodes.

He was about to head to you when a young fan, who happened to be attending with his parents, asked for his autograph and a picture, "whenever we are home, me and mama and papa watch all your races, you're one of Monaco's pride!", the boy who was no older than ten said excitedly, prompting Charles to open his blazer's button before crouching down to pose with him. Getting up and wishing everyone a good night and event, his eyes looked for you in your emerald green dress, now finding a gentleman in the chair you were sitting previously. Heading inside the venue, he greeted some people before he noticed you looking at something on your phone and confirming it on the indicating plaques, looking a but confused before you looked around and your eyes locked in his, "h- Hi, Charles, Hi!", you said as you greeted him, your movement so automatic that you didn't even think about hugging and pressing a kiss on each cheek of your ex-boyfriend, thankful that he seemed to want to do the same, "Hi, Y/N, how are you?", he said as he looked at you properly. And you looked even more beautiful, despite looking like the same girl he had fallen in love with all those years ago."Are you here alone, too?", you said and immediately wanted to take it back, feeling like you had nothing to do with it, "I'm on my own, yes. C'mon, let's go through here", he said as he guided you on the other way you were thinking of going, leading you to the big room where all the tables were and finding out that the table you'd be sitting in was next to his, "if you need anything, call for me, yes?", he said as he looked for reassurance, "you're going to do great, I just know it".

The evening was beautiful, getting the opportunity to listen to all the projects and ideas people were developing and over all having a good time, and while you enjoyed it, you needed to get some air, excusing yourself from the group and heading to one of the outside gardens, a glass in hand as you took in all that had happened for you to get here. You had never dreamt of this opportunity to come from something as simple as you sharing your thoughts outloud, finding people on the receiving end interested in what you had to say, and to be here was something you still couldn't make out, "may I?", you heard a familiar voice you could recognise anywhere, seeing Charles coming to sit next to you on the stone bench, "it's amazing how many inspiring people are here today, no?", he began, really not knowing how to approach you. You were here alone, so it wasn't like he was crossing a line, he hoped, remembering some conversations he heard in the last group gathering where one of your close friends admitted that you were single still, "and somehow I ended up here, too", you mused before looking at him, his eyes never failing to calm you down and rile your heart up at the same time, "of course you did. Your work is amazing, it's only fair they recognised it", he let slip, "how do you know that?", you quirked your brow as you took a sip from your glass, "I listen to it. Every Thursday I go and look for the new episode", he admitted, "I still don't understand half of the things you defend and explain, but you make it so engaging and, and I miss your voice. I miss you", he said as he looked up at the starry sky before he let his hand crawl along the light stone and nudge yours, your pinkies lacing eachother. You looked at him, a small blush on your cheeks, "thank you, I- I watch all your races too, even the ones that are broadcasted at daft o'clock in Europe", you said before sighing "you know why we did it that way it was", you said, remembering the day you and Charles decided it was for the best that you should go your separate ways.

"I love you so much", Charles said as he held your hands in his, "I love you so much and it is why I think we should do this", he reasoned, although the tears in his eyes, matching your own, reflected the genuine hurt you both knew was dawning on each of you, "I never want to be the one making you hurt, not in a short time or not in a long time", you sniffed, squeezing your eyes further to slow down the tears, "I love you with my whole heart and I'd never want you to hurt, either of us to hurt", you finished as you gave him one last hug, relishing in the feeling of having his arms around you, "you'll always have my heart, Y/N Y/L/N", he said kissing the top of your head, "and it will always be yours to keep".

"Was it really though?", he said, snuffling closer to you while still not touching you more than before even though his skin longed to feel yours, "I don't know, Charles, I really don't know", you said. You didn't like to admit it, but every now and again, you would entertain the thought of what could have been if you had stayed together. How your days could have been if you had him to come home to, or having to travel to races to see him, hear his laughs in person instead of through a screen. It would have been like you had predicted, crazy schedules, long periods away from eachother, but the effort to make it work would have been worth it to have him with you. As you were about to say that to him, you heard heels clicking on the floor, "sorry to interrupt, but the fireworks are going to go off now, I thought you might like to see them", one of the ladies that had helped you in the red carpet said as you both got up, "thanks for letting us know, we'll be up shortly", Charles offered before she walked away while you two followed her, "Would you be willing to come to my place tomorrow?", he asked as he finally laced his fingers in yours for a few seconds, parting when you reached the door, "okay", you said before you were ushered to different places in the crowd.

Arriving home later that evening, you were taking all your makeup off when your phone pinged, seeing a text from Charles, surprised that after all these years he, like you, had kept your number, "Even though we did not spend that much time together today, I know for a fact that I missed having you around and being near you. I hope you have a goodnight's rest", could be read on your screen.

.

"Thank you for coming here. I would've gone to your place but I didn't know if you wanted me there, and besides, I don't want all the attention that it could draw that way around to you", he said nervously, "No need to rub it in that you're more famous than me, Charles", you teased slightly, wanting to clear up the tension in the room that your nerves were not exactly helping, "I mean it. Thank you for agreeing to come and talk", he said before taking a big breath, "yesterday sparked something in me, and I'm not sure it was a spark again moment, I think this has always been here", he admitted, looking qt you in the hopes of getting you to speak about your take on it, "I-, I felt the same", you gulped, "but can we do this? I think so b-", you were interrupted by him, "all those years ago, we said we wanted to focus on our careers, grow and not have to worry about it. And, while I think it could've been good, there's no way to know that the success we have it due to that. Can you imagine having me next to you on your graduation? Signing your contracts? Because every weekend I imagine you sitting in that hospitality, working on your laptop before coming to watch me race and congratulate me, or be the only person in my driver's room to calm me down after a bad race", he admitted, "I know you don't owe me any of that and if this is one sided then I don't want to make you feel guilty about it, but I needed to let you know", he finished as he looked at you. Sighing, you launched your hand to meet his, "I miss you, and I want to have you with me, to get home and see you there, even if it is only every now and then. But I don't want you to feel guilty that you're not here, or that I feel like I'm not enough", you said and he giggled, "Mon ange, you are more than enough. And I'll be the luckiest man alive if you let me have you in my life again. We'll take things slowly, but please, let us go back to how we were", he pleaded as he saw you smile, "mon coeur, we are going to be better than ever".

[yelenabelovasbxtch]

Crush On An Archer PT. 3

A/N: No way I'm releasing parts on back-to-back days. On top of my shit I guess. I feel like we are getting closer and closer here people! Stay tuned...

Kate Bishop X f!reader

Word Count: 2.3k

Warnings: Not proofread

The wheels of your plane touched down at JFK and as you turn your phone back on you see another msg sent 2 mins ago from Kate pop up. 

“Hey, I tracked your flight updates online, I’m just waiting in a nearby parking lot whenever you get your bag and are ready.”

You got off your plane and you could feel the palms of your hands start to get sweaty. Why were you SO nervous to see her? You guys are just friends and based on how she talks to you about guys it will probably only ever be just that. You’re trying to remind yourself that she doesn’t like you like that and you guys are teammates so it’s not weird that you hang out. You’ve been texting constantly for the last couple of weeks, you probably talk to her more than most of your other friends at this point actually so it should. Not. Be. Weird. 

…yeah but it still is. 

You send Kate a text telling her terminal 2 is where you will be exiting, that you have your bags you’re just making your way through the airport. She hits you back saying okay and she’s on her way.

As the automatic doors slide open and you take a step out into New York’s warm summer climate you take a look around trying to spot Kate. You decide to pull out your phone and start typing out a message asking her what car she drives when all of a sudden you hear someone call your name.

“Y/N!!” 

You look up and there’s Kate waiving an arm at you three cars down with the sweetest smile on her face. 

You can feel your heart practically beating out of your chest. She’s got this cheeky grin that almost gives off a hint of nervousness as well as she opens her arms wide for you to hug her. 

You go in only wrapping one arm around as you continue to hold your luggage with the other. This move is something that you haven’t stopped thinking about since, why not just drop the bag and give her a full hug? It’s fine…it’s only something you will be overthinking for the rest of the year. 

“Hey! How was your flight? It’s so good to see you!.” 

“It was great, yeah, it flew by.”

Kate giggled at your little pun, “here let me take your bags!” She says going for your luggage and before you had a chance to even try to stop her she already grabbed it and was walking towards the trunk.

“T-Thank you!” 

“No worries, hop in.” She says opening the door to the back seat. 

Back seat is kind of odd. 

She quickly hops around the other side of the car and also hops in the back seat. You were confused at first but then quickly realized there was a man in the driver's seat. 

“Arnold, this is Y/N, Y/N, Arnold. He has been our family’s driver for years now and is taking us to campus.”

“Lovely to meet you Miss. Y/N.” He says.

“Likewise.”

Wow okay so she… comes from money? 

“Wow Kate, I didn’t realize you had someone else driving, you didn’t have to come all this way to pick me up.”

“Y/N, seriously it is not a big deal. Besides, now I at least have some company as we drive to campus…not that you aren’t great company Arnold!!”

“I enjoy talking to you too Miss. Bishop but I will give the two of you some privacy.” He says as his hand touches a button above his head causing a privacy screen to roll up giving the two of you your own separate space. 

“So, how’re you feeling about your classes this year?” Kate asks. 

“Pretty good, I’m just glad I got most of the ones I wanted. My first semester is pretty hard but the second not as much, what about you?”

“Yeah pretty much the same. Not really looking forward to school though, I’m pretty trash at math and one of my business courses requires a section on it so I am not looking forward to that.”

“I mean, if you ever need a tutor or any help I could always be of service. I am not like a genius but I finished top in my class for the last three years or so…so I would say I know a thing or two.”

“Wow so she’s fantastic at archery and a genius? Student athlete perfection. What can’t you do?”

“Haha trust me, I am FAR from perfection. I cannot write a good essay to save my life. It is a real struggle.”

“Okay so what I’m hearing is I will proofread all your written work and you explain math problems to me and together we just become super successful student athletes together.”

“Haha, yes. I like the sounds of that.”

“Do you have any open days in your school schedule?”

“Thursday nights are open after practice.”

“Did you want to try to get in the habit of meeting up on Thursday nights then to study together?”

Wow…she wants to see you once a week outside of practice?

“Yeah I’d love to.” Was saying love too much?

“It’s a date. Or well..many dates- technically.” 

You could feel your face getting hot just from her saying that as you try to squeeze out a smile with your unbelievably large eyes just staring at her. A nervous laugh escaped your mouth and you were hoping she didn’t notice the sudden shift in mood for you but she definitely did. 

Kate was the best person to talk to though because she just loved to talk, nonstop. She decided to change up the subject and start talking about other stuff going on in her life, friend drama, archery, family, her dog, literally anything and everything until you guys got to campus. She dropped you off at your apartment and being the person she is, even got out of the car to grab you your bags and everything. 

This is your chance to try again at the hug thing if the opportunity presents itself.

“So, are you just unpacking tonight and stuff?”

“Yeah, pretty much. That and probably cleaning. My roommates are such a mess and when I’m not around to pick up after them, it doesn’t get done.”

Kate’s brows furrowed at your comment. “That’s not very fair to you.”

“Yeah, is what it is. I have gotten used to it. Besides, I don’t mind cleaning, I find it pretty relaxing.”

“Haha maybe I should have you come over sometime then.” She says sarcastically.

You laugh nervously again totally not thinking about how you would absolutely take her up on that given the chance. Anything to spend more time with her. 

“Well, have fun unpacking and with your therapeutic cleaning haha.”

“I will, thanks so much again for helping me out and picking me up from the airport, seriously it meant a lot.”

“Of course! Anytime.” She says as she passes you your bag and turns around to get back in the car. 

Damn. No hug. Guess you’ll just have to keep thinking about the fact that you fumbled the one chance you got at that.

*3 hrs later* (10:00PM)

You check your phone, Kate messaged you. 

“How's the cleaning going?” You were honestly surprised she reached out since you just saw her and the two of you talked for so long today. 

“I actually just wrapped things up, it wasn’t as messy as I thought it would be but the bathroom was gross.”

“Haha, that’s living with 3 other girls I guess right. What else are you thinking of doing tonight? You must be pretty tired after your flight.”

“I’m not sure, I’m actually not that tired. I had a shower so I feel a lot better now but my body doesn’t seem to want to go to sleep. Wbu?”

“Ugh nothing, I’m bored just bored lol.”

“Yeah true, I was thinking of watching a movie or something maybe tonight and then trying to sleep after that.”

“Ouuu what movie were you thinking of watching?”

“I don’t know, something comforting. I was leaning towards a Harry Potter movie but I feel like that’s too big of a commitment. Maybe like a Disney movie or something, maybe Mulan or Moana.”

“Ugh both are SUCH good choices, Moana is SO good but Mulan is a classic and one of my personal favs.”

“I think I am leaning towards Mulan.”

“Sounds like a good idea to me.”

Would it be crazy to invite her over? It’s too late right? And you already saw her today. Is that too much y/n Kate time? Fuck it right? You’re just friends, she will probably say no anyways. 

“Hey you wouldn’t want to come over and watch it with me would you?”

Fuck. The immediate regret sets in once you hit send. But you couldn’t unsend the message in case she had already read it. The three dots pop up showing she’s typing, then they disappear…popped up again…and they’re gone. They haven’t come back. Fuck. You can feel your heart racing. You practically threw your phone across the bed and then all of a sudden you hear your phone ding and immediately throw your body towards it. 

“I’d love to.” Your eyes widen at the text as another one pops up. “I’ll be over in 10.”...

“Actually 15, what’s your favorite ice cream flavor?”

“Ouuu, I’d have to say Strawberry.”

“Okay, see you soon <3” 

The heart emoji at the end of that text had you sitting still for a solid two minutes straight when you suddenly snapped out of it and realized she’s going to be here in 10 or so minutes and you need to make yourself look more presentable. You hop out of bed, brush your teeth, brush your hair, put on some cute PJ bottoms and an oversized hoodie as you get the softest and fluffiest blankets and pillows arranged nicely on your bed. You light a candle from bath and body works to make it smell nice and turn off the overhead lights and on all of the mood lighting in your room. 

“Hey I’m outside.” 

You go to open the door and Kate is standing in front of you with her dark hair tossed up in a messy bun, wearing plaid pj pants and a tight black tank top that is clinging to her leaving practically nothing up to your imagination.

“HEY!” She says excitedly as she holds up two pints of ice cream. 

“Come in, come in.” You say gesturing her into your apartment. “My room is the first on the left.”

“Wowww it’s so nice and very clean in here.” she says with a giggle.

“Haha. Thank you, I try.” I got the movie all loaded up on my TV, take a seat, I’m going to go grab us some spoons. Do you want some water or something?”

“Yeah, water would be great, thank you.”

You grab what you need and come back to see Kate comfortable on your bed. 

“Hey, thanks for bringing ice cream.”

“Of course, you can’t have a movie night without a little treat!”

You get in bed and hit play on the movie. Although you were in your own space you couldn’t help but be overly aware of every part of your body and everything you were doing. Breathing heavy, eating loudly, how you were sitting, how you looked from her perspective, everything was racing through your mind and you could hardly focus on the movie. You were trying so hard not to look over at her because you didn’t want to create an awkward moment but it felt like you were FIGHTING your intrusive thoughts for an hour straight and it was making you exhausted. Towards the end of the movie you could feel your eyes getting heavy and next thing you know you’re waking up the next morning in your bed. You look next to you, no Kate. 

Fuck please tell me you didn’t actually just dream up that entire scenario. That sucks. God she’s such a big part of your life now that you’re dreaming about her. Even your subconscious is teasing you. 

You grab your phone to check the time *9am*.

“Morning sleepy pants. I had fun last night. I figured you were exhausted so I ended up taking off after the movie was done. Blew out the candle, put away the ice cream and dishes in the sink.”

Shit. So it wasn’t a dream and you just fumbled for the second time in one day by falling asleep.

“Fuck. I’m sorry did I fall asleep next to you last night?”

Three bubbles popped up as she typed away.

“Haha. More like ON me.” she replies. Your face confused until a picture follows through 2 seconds later of you practically drooling on her shoulder. 

How are you ever going to recover from this one? You probably should transfer schools.

“FUCK. I am SO sorry omg I will def be making this up to you.”

“Y/n, it's okay haha. You were obviously tired after your flight, I can’t blame you travel makes me sleepy too plus it was late. Did you get a good night's rest at least?”

“Yes, definitely.”

“Good, you’re going to need your energy because we are going out tonight and I’m not letting you fall asleep at 11pm again.”

“Haha alright, sounds like a plan.”

“Good. Relax for the rest of the day, I’m coming over at 7 with vodka and good music so be ready babe.”

“See you at 7” 

– End of Pt 3. –

Taglist: @yelenaslyubov @youreatotalposer @jeyramarie @flosbelova @bridgecitybrad @justthis-stuff @chloe7076 @ailenepuff @ravenclawbitch426 @mellowladyangel @amcg0605-blog @kassies-take @yelenaswife1996 @wandanatchick @lilroachsworld @inluvwithfictionalwomen @x666hours @natashaswife4125 @onetruwhore @karmasgxrl @hopelesslyfallenninlove @setsuna1415 @swiftdazer @imobsessedwithmilfss @madamevirgo @louisprettybab @splatalia-jumpanova @jediluka @t00manyfand0ms @oohlala666 @kates-abs-slay @scmg11

[wandafiction]

Lunch Date - Just Us Chapter 17

Warnings: Fluff, Humour.

Word Count: 2860

Series List | Chapter 16 | Chapter 18

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I had my head buried in piles of paperwork that had accumulated on my desk from the previous day because I had decided to spend the day with Carol instead of coming to work, but I'm the boss so I can do that every once in a while. I was sort of hoping maybe one of my associates would have been able to sign a few of these things off. Unfortunately, that is not how this was going to work because we were going to be signing on a group of new scientists who had just finished school, apprentices as you will and I am going over their applications with a fine tooth comb. Tony also emailed me about 3 of the 100 candidates and how they are the best of the best. Top grades can just get on with their work, give them something to fiddle with and they fiddle. Give them one of our gadgets and tell them to fix it, they can fix it. So that's who's profile I am currently looking at. 

Peter Parker

Ned Leeds 

Michelle Jones

They all went to the same school, all got into trouble here and there for working on science projects not condoned by the school board but proved they were willing to take risks. I like them! My search is put on pause when my office phone rings, the name on the screen showing my assistant.

"Good afternoon, Boss." The cheery voice echoes through the phone.

"Good afternoon Mantis."

"I have a Miss Maximoff waiting downstairs for you, reception thought they best phone up before sending her up. She says she has an appointment but I don't see one in your schedule." 

"It's not on the books Mantis because it's lunch. Get them to send her up, get Drax to escort her to my office, tell him not to pretend to be camouflage this time." I hear Mantis laugh down the line.

"Of course Boss I will get them to send her up right away." 

A few minutes later there is a light knock at the door, before it opens slightly and Mantis pops her head in the gap. I simply nod at her and she opens up the door, and in enters Drax and Wanda. When I see Wanda I have a large smile on my face that actually hurts my face muscles. 

"You're free to go Drax, just close the door behind you." Drax's eyes go wide.

"How did you know I was here?"

"Just because you stand still and silent doesn't mean you're camouflaged."

"But it works on everyone."

"I'm not everyone though Drax." 

"Hah! No you're not. Right, I will leave you to it boss." 

"Thank you Drax, don't slam the door on your way o...too late." I let out a small laugh as the door slams and I hear Drax's voice through the door as he lets out a small sorry. I turn to Wanda who has a matching smile on her face. "Good afternoon princess."

"Afternoon dorogoy." She lets her accent slip out, god I love that accent. "Should I be offended that I was not in your calendar?" 

"Well maybe I want to keep you as my dirty little secret for a while."

"Oh yeah?" She quirks an eyebrow as she sits on the chair on the other side of my desk laying a few containers on the desk.

"Yeah. You know, sneaking you in and out of the building these super secret meetings." 

"Hmm, and what would these super secret meetings consist of?" She grabs some plastic plates from her bag, wow this woman is prepared.

"Well today's meeting is about food, what do you want the meetings to be about princess?" I see a blush grow on her face and I give her a sly smirk. "Oh, do you like the idea of being a dirty secret? Sneaking around maybe allowing me to bend you over the desk and taking you right here in my office, or you under the desk between my legs." 

"You keep talking like that and we are skipping food." I laugh out loud.

"Unfortunately not today princess, I mean you have to be able to walk back into work without limping." She bites her lip at the thought before pushing my food in front of me. "So what have you made for me princess?" 

"Nothing special unfortunately, just some leftovers from last night with fruit and salad. I am used to cooking for 3 people so I cooked way to much last night." 

"Well whatever it is looks lovely." I scoop some of the food put onto my plate, ready to eat but waiting for Wanda to dish her food up. "Do we need to heat it up at all? I have a microwave in the mini kitchen."

"You have a kitchen in your office?" She looks around, not being able to see it so I point to one of the few doors in the room. "And yeah it's better hot "

"Okay, well follow me to the kitchen then. I only have it because I sometimes work here for days on end, so instead of starving to death I can at least cook. Cooking is a nice break from the work as well so it's a win win. Don't die of starvation, and get to relax."

I lead Wanda into a small kitchen, it literally has a couple of cupboards, an oven and microwave, but also a coffee machine for when I really need to stay awake and a fridge freezer of course. I grab Wanda's plate first by placing it into the microwave and setting it for about 4 minutes. I can see it has chicken in it so it needs to be piping hot. No food poisoning for us. No thank you. I turn to the coffee machine adding in a pod of my choice, caramel latte because you cannot go wrong with one of them...and they are my favourite. 

The beautiful aroma of the food being cooked, well reheated, spreads around the room. I recognise the smell, but will have to taste it to be sure but with Wanda being sokovian it wouldn't surprise me if she has cooked chicken paprikash. As the coffee machine is finishing off my drink, the microwave beeps so I take out Wanda's food, give it a stir and put it back in for 2 minutes then head back to my coffee which is now ready.

"What would you like?" I realise we have been stood in silence, as once again Wanda just observed me like she is in some sort of trance.

"Sorry, what?" She blinks a couple times coming back to reality.

"What coffee would you like?"

"Does that thing make iced lattes?"

"It does. Any flavours?" She nods and points to the caramel. "Good because it was that or nothing." 

The microwave beeps once again as I start the coffee machine to make Wanda's drink, I shuffle over to the microwave using a tea towel to take it out and place it on the counter. I grab a proper plate from one of the cupboards and transfer Wanda's food onto it. I slide the plate over to where Wanda is standing while pouring my food into a microwaveable dish and putting it in for four minutes, just like I did for Wanda's.

"That smells really good princess, can't wait to try it." She covers her mouth with her hand when she goes to speak.

"Well it's my favourite, so I really hope you like it. It's something special from Sokovia." 

"I believe it's Chicken Paprikash, right?" Wanda smiles at me as she takes another bite.

"It is. How did you know?" 

"Don't forget I've travelled to Sokovia." The coffee machine finishes off her drink and I hand it over. "There's a nice place there where the Old Sokovian witches, well that's what they call themselves, make the meal from scratch. I believe the place is called the coven."

"You've been to the coven? Wow, normally they don't let anyone who is Sokovian inside." I shrug at her with a small smile. "What did you do?" 

"I may or may not have saved the head 'witches' grandson after he got shot by one of ultrons men. Let's just say I was made an honorary Sokovian after that as I then took down the guy, saved the child's life and paid for anything the child needed afterwards. No child should go through that." 

"And here I thought you just travelled there for business to add more to your account." Okay ouch, but I guess from many stories of millionaires who don't share their wealth or do good by their wealth paint this picture for the rest of us. "Sorry not that you don't help, and give money. I just guess, I don't. I'm sorry I shouldn't have said that." 

"It's okay Wanda." The microwave pings, as I think of what to say next I stir my food, placing it back in for a bit longer. "What's your take on my wealth? Like does it bother you?" 

"I thought it would, but I guess with how much you help with your money I can't really judge you for being a good business woman. I'm also not in this for the money if that's also what you want to ask. I have no interest in using you as my sugar daddy, well sugar mama I guess. I mean of course I would love to be spoiled but I'm not after your money." 

"That's not what I expected to hear, but also it was." Wanda gives me the 'that makes no sense' look but before I can explain myself the microwave interrupts.

Damn microwave. I hold up my finger to let Wanda know all will be explained in a moment as I walk to the microwave taking my food out, giving it a small smell and letting out a happy sigh. This shit smells good, looks good and made by a Sokovian so it's going to taste so fucking good, my mouth is watering just at the sight of it my taste buds very excited to be having this once again. I usher Wanda out of the kitchen, both of us with drinks and food in our hands, placing it down on the desk. I clear off the paperwork by putting it in one of my filing boxes and sticking it on top of the filing cabinet and close the lid of my laptop, and turn off my computer screens so there are no distractions on this lunch date.

I stab my fork into my chicken, I can feel Wanda's eyes on me waiting for my reaction. I bring it slowly to my mouth, leaning over my ate looking at Wanda through my eyelashes as I bring my fork mouth slowly biting off the chicken. I chew a few times and fling my head onto the back of my chair and moan at the taste as it almost devolves in my mouth. The chicken is cooked perfectly, I can taste all the herbs and flavours in the sauce. This is fucking amazing! I look back to Wanda after swallowing to see her blushing heavily, I point my fork at her then at the food.

"Speechless." I take another bite as a big grin covers Wanda's face, her eyes almost closing her nose scrunched. HOLY SHIT, SHE SCRUNCHED HER NOSE! Cute!

"Good speechless? Or bad speechless?" 

"This is fucking delicious Wanda. It's fucking amazing. I mean it literally melted in my mouth. This is on par if not better than when I went to the coven." Her jaw drops at my admission.

"I knew it was good. But now you're just lying, nothing is better than the coven."

"Well this is." I take a bite, then another. "You have to cook this on Saturday, please." I give her my best puppy dog eyes and pout.

"I can't say no to those eyes." She leans across the desk to peck my lips a couple of times till my pout turns into a smile.

"Pouting gets me kisses. Noted." 

"You're a cute dorogoy." 

"I know." I swing in my chair like a child as she laughs at my reply. "You're cute too princess." 

"Good save." She winks at me as she continues to eat her food moaning herself as she eats it. "You're right this is so good. It doesn't matter how many times I eat and cook this, it seems to get better every time." 

"Well I mean maybe it's because I'm not actually Sokovian, but mine never tastes this good." Wanda hums in thought as I take another bite.

"But you're an honorary Sokovian so I'm sure it tastes just as good." I twist my lips thinking about it. No mine will never be this good.

"Nope. You add a secret ingredient and I can't put my finger on it." A take another bite, taking my time to chew to see if I can figure it out.

"Maybe I do, maybe I don't. Who knows." I look up at her through squinted eyes and point my fork, that has a bit of chicken on it, towards her.

"What's your secret?" Wanda rolls her eyes, leaning forward to steal the chicken off my fork smirking at me as she swallows my mouth agape in shock. So I lean over the desk, stab my fork into a piece of her chicken and eat it. 

"That secret is for me to know and for you, well, it's for me to know." 

"Har har, so funny using my words against me. Really you're hilarious." I state sarcastically as I take another bite of my chicken.

"You will get to know my secret ingredient when I know your secret ingredient." 

"So if I was to say my secret ingredient is my love for making them, what would you say?" She tilts her head giving me an unamused look.

"I would say, I'm not dumb and you're not getting the answer from me."

"Fine, keep your secrets. I like this mysterious thing you've got going on." Wanda laughs out loud as she shakes her head at me through her laughs.

"You're such an idiot, if I'm mysterious you're just as mysterious miss secret keeper." 

I gently place my fork on my plate, wiping my mouth with a bit of kitchen towel and lean back into my desk chair letting out a satisfied sigh. Wanda does the same a few moments later, both of us just basking in the silence and each other's company. Every now and again we catch each other staring and we send a smile to each other as we both end up blushing. It's kind of cute and relaxing. Not going to lie. 

We are brought out of our quiet bubble by a knock at the door. I look at the clock on the wall, Holy shit it's just turned 2! Wanda is late getting back. I clear my throat before telling the person behind the door to come in.

"Sorry to interrupt Boss, Miss Maximoff. But your 2 o'clock has just turned up." Wanda looks up at the clock herself and stands to start packing away.

"Who's my 2 o'clock again, Mantis?" I say as I smooth out my suit and help Wanda to pack up her stuff.

"Your meeting is with Nebula." 

"About the security stuff right?" Without my laptop I'm not always the best at remembering who I have a meeting with and when because I have so many meetings.

"Yes Boss it is."

"Thank you Mantis. Can you show Miss Maximoff out once she leaves."

"Of course Boss. I will be outside." With that she leaves, closing the door gently behind her.

"Sorry that our date has to end like this, I completely lost track of time." I say as I wipe down my desk now Wanda has packed everything back up. She makes her way over to me cupping my face with her hands.

"Don't be, I lost track of time too. I had a really good time." She stands on her tiptoes pecking my lips a couple of times, but I end up deeping it, capturing her lips between mine.

 As I pull away I bring her bottom lip with me realising it with a pop. Rubs her lips together licking slightly with her tongue, her eyes shiny with an emotion I can't quite read.

"I will see you on Saturday dorogoy. I'm home all day, so come over whenever." She pecks my lips again.

"I will see you Saturday princess. Now off you go." I peck her lips a couple of times until she smiles which makes me smile. 

She kisses me one last time before turning towards the door. Wanda opens the door but turns around to face me and sends me a kiss so I send one right back. Her smile widens and she practically bounces out of the room, closing the door behind her. 

I'm really falling for this woman, and I can't stop. I just hope she feels the same.

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[stardustshelb]

"Orange Juice" Part One

TW: Language. Your name (female) + Danny. 3,157 words.

The song "Orange Juice" by Noah Kahan inspired me to write this story; each part of the story is inspired by a different part of the song. Also, I'm in my sad girl era so you all must suffer with me.

“Feels like I've been ready for you to come home for so long.

That I didn't think to ask you where you'd gone.

Why'd you go?” - NK

I should have known when my dad texted me to check my email that there’d be something interesting waiting for me in my inbox. The organizers of my high school reunion had no idea how to get in touch with me, so they went through him. Part of me wished he would have just deleted the email and never said anything. How has it already been 10 years since I graduated? I swear it was only yesterday that Sam and I were daydreaming about record deals and tours while sitting in class. My parents were never too hard on me about school because I still made time for both my studies and my band. But I think they always knew that I was never going to need to know chemistry or calculus because I was going to have a career in music. Though, none of us would have ever dreamed I’d be where I am today.

Josh and Jake skipped out on their high school reunion a couple years ago, and Sam was planning to do the same for ours. It would probably cause more trouble than it’s worth if we showed up. Truth be told, I wasn’t dying to go but I was curious to know if you’d be there. We haven’t spoken since I left Frankenmuth. Hell, we stopped talking while I was still there. I’ve heard stories about you from my mom. “The girl who got away is in rehab again,” she’d say casually over the phone. Something about the way she’d say again angered me, but I knew she meant well. 

Judging by the date on the invitation, I still had a few months to decide whether I was going to attend or not. Maybe I could find out if you were planning on going while I’m home later this week for Christmas. I wondered if you’d even be around town or if you’d even want to see me. Our friendship didn’t end on the best of terms and that still bothered me nearly a decade later. I wonder if you’ve ever forgiven me for that night. It took a while for me to forgive myself.

…

“Let me help,” Dad said as he grabbed my guitar case out of the back of the SUV I rented for the week. I tried to pack light for the quick trip but between my suitcase, guitar, and the presents I bought for my family, I ended up checking more luggage than I expected. I could smell Mom’s cooking from the driveway, and I had to swallow the lump of nostalgia that formed in my throat. I rolled my suitcases up the walkway and before Dad could even turn the knob, Josie ran through the front door and practically tackled me. 

“Easy, easy,” I said as I tried to keep from falling backward on top of my luggage.

“I’m so happy you’re home!” she squealed as she let go of our hug. She grabbed the larger suitcase from my hand and followed our dad inside. Christmas music was lightly playing throughout the house which told me that Mom was in charge of the stereo. I was home for Christmas but I didn’t quite feel like I was home. I almost felt like a stranger walking through the house I was raised in. Maybe I was tired from traveling, maybe I just wasn’t in the Christmas spirit this year, or maybe thoughts of you crept in as soon as the plane’s wheels touched down in Michigan.

“Daniel, did you hear me?” my mom’s voice broke into my thoughts.

“I’m sorry, what?” I asked.

“Do you want to put your things away and then come to the kitchen to help me finish dinner?” she repeated.

“Sure, yes, be right there,” I said as I dragged my belongings to my childhood bedroom. When I walked through the door, I was glad to see nothing had been moved. Mom and Dad were always sentimental; therefore, I come by it naturally. I glanced around the room and tried to balance the surreal feeling of being back home. It was just as I left it the last time I visited. Unmade bed and all. “It’s not going to make itself,” I could hear my dad say like he did my entire life. I never understood the point in making a bed if I was just going to sleep in it every night anyways. I moved closer to the disheveled comforter and lifted the mattress. I pushed my hand between the mattress and the box springs searching for my secret stash of notes you had written me many lifetimes ago. Worn and faded folded notes brushed against my fingertips and I gently pulled them out. 

“Daniel?” I heard my mom call from the kitchen. Suddenly, I opened the top drawer to my nightstand and threw the notes inside. I would have to read them at another time. I got up and made my way into the kitchen where Mom was mixing something on the stove.

“Hey, Mom,” I said as I leaned in to kiss her on the cheek.

“Hello, hun,” she said as she placed her hand against the side of my face. The unfamiliar feeling I had earlier was slowly going away. “I wanted to talk to you,” she said, turning away from me and back to her cooking. 

“What about?” I said as I began slicing the carrots she laid out on the cutting board.

“I saw y/n the other day. And… we spoke,” she said, still keeping her back to me. I remained focused on my task of cutting the carrots.

“About?” I asked.

“You mostly,” she said. I winced.

“What about me?” I asked.

“She looks great,” my mom answered, obviously avoiding my question.

“What about me?” I repeated.

“Your music, your success, you coming home for Christmas,” she said as her tone changed.

“Did she seem interested in any of that information?” I asked.

“I think so, but then again, she could have been playing nice,” Mom said as she came over to take the knife that I was just holding. I realized I had stopped cutting the carrots since I was fixated on this conversation. You were back in town and you knew I was here too. 

“I can do it,” I said as I held the knife firmly. Mom patted my shoulder and walked back to the stove.

“I think she’s staying sober this time,” my mom added.

“I hope so,” I said quietly. 

…

“Not one nick on your finger, you just asked me to hold you.

But it made you a stranger and filled you with anger.” - NK

I’ve spent two days at home, yet I still feel like an outsider. I don’t think anyone has noticed because I am able to wear a figurative mask well. That ability comes in handy for shows and interviews when I’m feeling sick or tired. I offered to help my mom finish her grocery shopping for Christmas dinner, so I put on my baseball hat backwards and grabbed my keys. She texted me a list of things she still needed which I was grateful for. She even included pictures of the items as if I were an idiot, but in her defense, I haven’t shopped for my own groceries in years. Our staff knows what I like and it just appears in our green rooms. Maybe this trip home will humble me a bit. 

I decided to drive a little further outside of Frankenmuth to go to a less crowded grocery store. I don’t normally draw much attention when I’m alone in public, but I didn’t want to take the risk. I wasn’t feeling like myself and I didn’t want to project negative feelings on my fans. I pulled into the parking spot furthest away from the entrance and reviewed the list on my phone as I walked through the automatic doors. I grabbed a basket and made my way toward the spices/seasonings aisle. I scanned the shelves looking for Mom’s specific brand of garlic powder. When I spotted it, I threw one container in my basket and turned to make my way down the rest of the aisle. As I began to walk, I noticed an employee abruptly turned the opposite direction and left. Strange. I continued my quest of finding my mom’s requirements with my basket getting heavier by the minute. 

When I had finally acquired everything she needed, I made my way to the front of the store to check out. With it being only two days until Christmas, the store was crowded despite it being in such a small town. There looked to be only two cashiers working, so I stood in line behind what I thought would be the quickest one. Of course, I chose wrong. I tried to hide my impatience by scrolling on my phone when I heard your name.

“Y/n, come to register three, please. Y/n, come to register three,” was announced over the intercom. 

Suddenly, the employee who eluded me earlier now made her appearance. It was you. Avoiding my gaze (and probably open mouth), you snuck behind an empty cash register. I hesitated on whether to go to your line or not. It was obvious you tried to avoid me at all costs, but I felt a pull to see you. Talk to you. Listen to your voice. Against my better judgment, I made my way to join your line. As I got closer to needing to check out, I could see your cheeks getting more red. I held my breath in anticipation until it was my turn.

“Did you find everything ok?” you asked without looking up from the groceries you were scanning out of my basket.

“I did, yes,” I muttered. You stopped scanning and stared down at the bag of brown sugar in your hands for a brief moment until you carried on with your task. I watched you continue to take my groceries and scan them without ever looking to meet my eyes. You were flustered; I could tell. I tried not to stare but I was almost in disbelief that you were right in front of me. Even though it has been a decade, you haven’t aged. Your face has changed but you still look like you always did to me.

“Your total is $98.44. Will you be using cash or credit today?” you asked again without looking at me. You were trying so hard to focus on the screen in front of you.

“Uh, cash,” I said as I reached for my wallet in my jean pocket. Suddenly, I couldn’t find it. I reached into the other pocket and still couldn’t find it. I began to panic. Did I lose my damn wallet in this store? Was it stolen? Then I realized, I never grabbed it off the nightstand when I grabbed my keys before I left. 

“Shit,” I said as I hung my head. “I don’t have my wallet. Do you know if your system takes ApplePay? I have my card on my phone,” I explained.

“No, we don’t. Our technology isn’t updated, but don’t worry about it,” you said as you bent down to get into your purse beneath the register.

“No, I can’t have you pay for this. I’ll just come back with my wallet if you can set it to the side,” I pleaded.

I watched you grab the card reader and stick your own credit card in the chip reader. I was bewildered.

“Y/n,” I spoke so quietly I wasn’t sure if you heard me.

“Merry Christmas,” you said as you handed me the receipt. And for the first time, you met my eyes. They had a sadness to them that I couldn’t quite place. A sadness that matched mine. 

“What time do you get off? I am going to come back to pay you back,” I said.

“Have a great day, sir,” you answered, avoiding my question. I watched you direct your attention to the customer behind me. “Ahem,” he said as a sign for me to move.

I grabbed my bags of groceries and made my way to the rental SUV. I needed to get home quickly to grab my wallet and make it back to pay you. But I knew I didn’t need to go over the speed limit since I was now illegally driving without my license. I fought the urge to speed but remained as level-headed as I could be. 

 …

After putting the refrigerated bags of groceries away, I quickly ran up stairs to grab my wallet. I checked to make sure I had enough cash to pay you back and then some. I shoved it in my back pocket and raced down the hallway.

“Whoa, where are you going in such a hurry?” Josie asked as I tried to avoid running into her.

“I have to go back to the store. I forgot something,” I said in practically one breath.

“Why do I feel like you’re lying to me?” she asked as her brows furrowed.

“I’m not. I just need to get back there,” I explained.

“I can come with you,” she offered.

“Sure, yeah, that’s fine,” I said. I didn’t really want company but maybe you’d be more apt to talk to me if my sister was there. You two always got along so well. Sometimes I wondered if you were more her best friend rather than mine.

“So what did you forget?” Josie asked as she climbed into the passenger seat.

“My wallet,” I said.

“So how did you make it home with all of the groceries?” she asked.

“The cashier paid for my stuff, so now I’m on my way to pay her back,” I said. I left out the detail that you were the cashier. 

“Well that was awfully nice of her,” Josie said with a suspicious tone in her voice.

I pulled into the parking lot and nearly forgot to turn off the ignition before jumping out of the car. I ran through the automatic doors and made my way to your line. As if you could sense I was watching you, you kept your gaze locked on your task again. 

“Thanks for waiting on me,” I heard Josie sarcastically say as she came up beside me. 

“Sorry,” I said. 

“Wait,” she said. I looked down to see her staring at you. “Oh, ok, now I get it.”

“I’m just paying her back,” I said.

“I’m going to go look at… that display over there,” Josie said as she turned on her heel.

“Josie…” I said.

“I won’t be far,” she said as she began to walk away. When it came my turn, you kept your eyes locked on the screen in front of you. I stood there waiting for you to acknowledge me for what felt like eternity.

“Aren’t you going to ask me if I found everything ok?” I asked.

“Don’t mock me,” you said with a sense of anger in your voice.

“I wasn’t!” I exclaimed. Suddenly I felt my cheeks getting warm. “I would never.” You continued not to look at me, but I could see what I thought may have been tears forming in your eyes. My heart swelled.

“I came to pay you back,” I said as I held out two $100 bills. You glanced at the money in my hand.

“That’s significantly more than what your total was,” you said.

“I know. Just consider the rest a thank-you gift,” I said.

“I’m not a damn charity case,” you said with a bite in your voice.

“Y/n, I don’t think that. I just wanted to–” I began.

You interrupted, “If I take the money, will you leave?” 

“If that’s what you want, then yes. I will leave,” I said solemnly. Suddenly, you reached out and quickly grabbed the money from my hand. I felt my heart break as I noticed you were fighting back tears.

“Thank you,” you said quietly.

“I know I’m the last person you want to see, but–” I started.

“You are,” you interrupted.

“But if you could find the time, I’d really like the chance to visit with you,” I finished.

“You told me you would leave if I took the money,” you said looking past me and at the line forming behind me. 

“Good bye, y/n,” I said sullenly before turning to walk away. And all of the guilt and pain that I thought I left behind when I abandoned this town suddenly came rushing back.

 …

I sat on the edge of my childhood bed and stared at my feet on the floor for what felt like eternity. I had the urge to read our notes that I hid in my nightstand, but seeing you today might be all that I can take. You are still angry with me, and I figured you always will be. I don’t know why I expected that anger to go away after 10 years. Maybe it’s because it did for me. I felt the need to talk to you even more now than I did before. I opened the drawer to my nightstand and started to sift through our notes. There were dozens of faded, folded notes. I gently unwrapped the one where you drew a middle finger on the front of. I smiled as I read through the lines of teenage angst. Oh how our problems back then seemed to be so much more important. I remember you were mad at me because I let Sam ride shotgun in my car even though you claimed it before school that morning. I told you to take it up with Sam, but clearly you thought I should have been on your side. You didn’t talk to me until lunch that day when you handed me this note and told me you hoped I choked on my breadstick. Then you laughed hysterically when I immediately grabbed the breadstick off my plate and choked myself with it. Doing something stupid like that was all it took to make you smile and forgive me. I made sure Sam stayed in the backseat the rest of the school year.

I opened another note and scanned it until I found my holy grail: Your phone number. This was one of the first notes you ever wrote me. I wondered if you still had the same number all of these years later. I know mine has changed several times, but my circumstances were different. I decided to take a leap and dialed the ten digits written in a glittery blue gel pen. I held my breath as I heard it ring.

"Hello?" I heard your voice answer.

[awkwardlesbianwriter]

Chapter 3

Nancy toss her small bag on the floor and just lay her body lazily on her bed her mind occupied by Robin's locker “Does Robin likes girls? or she just like scribbiling it, and admiring women just like being artist.” She place a pillow on her face, Nancy knows about queer people but she never have any close encounter with them. She read a lot of news paper articles, also watch news in her younger days but her dad turn off the TV, when it's about queer people. She pursue journalism because she hates injustice and discrimination. Other people likes to avoid social issues, as if they are not affected of it. Nancy wants to be vocal about human rights. It's hard to adjust in her time but one thing she only knew that in the future. People are welcoming and educated, thinking out of the box. People will learn about the history to avoid doing it again. She stares at the ceiling, thinking again while having an eye to eye with a lizard that stick on the wall, until her phone rings.

“Uh hello Nance, I know it's already midnight but I would like thank you for lending a helping hand earlier” Robin gulp. She knew that Nancy might as sleep now, and not wanting to disturb her sleepy dream state. “That's what's make us friends, supporting each other. I know that our grades are important for college admission, you are trying to maintain your grades by not wanting to miss it but also take care of yourself.” Nancy's said in sleepy voice her eyes become puffy while she's yawning.

It's already past 2 am. When everyone is sleeping, the two girls are still awake. talking about something their own school clubs.

“Oh, I guess you are sleepy now, did I disturb you? I'm not intended to do that Nancy, I know sleeping is important to you. we can talk tommorow Goodnight!”

No one actually received Goodnight at 3am basically it's day time.

In the next day, Robin listening to her walkman. They decided to continue the group work at Nancy's house because it's not too far away at school. Robin walking with her bike Nancy is in the other side of her, the two are too quite as if they don't want to talk. There's a steal glance going on while continuesly walking towards the paths. Robin can't take anymore, she break the silence.

“Let's watch movie after the group work” Robin suggest even though the plan is I'm not sleeping early “I don't have a time to watch, the group work will be take a too much time to finish.” Robin understand her reason, she go back staring at the street again.

Their conversation become awkward more and more. After a minutes she saw Nancy's house, a few meters away from them as they go inside Nancy's Mom greet them. “Oh hello..Robin good to see you here again” Mrs Wheeler said happily. Both of Robin and Nancy's parents are close to each other. “Yeah, Mrs Wheeler, it's group works stuff” Robin said in smiley face, Nancy just staring at the two. “Ohhhh enjoy here feel at home, as you used to sweetie...Nancy didn't tell to me that you are going today. Anyway, are you two doing well in school?”

“Yeah Mom, were kind of busy right now talk to you later” Nancy lead Robin to her bed room. “Alright, I'll call you two when dinner is ready” Mrs. Wheeler shouted before Nancy close the door.

To be continue...

[lost-jams]

Brushes And Beats chapter: 02

pairing: JiminxReader

genre: fluff with a pinch of angst

trope: enemies to lovers

:That one moment when you realize that...You are screwed:

I'm lying on my stomach and I press my cheek into my pillow. My body had grown restless and hungry, I felt as if I'm floating and yet I felt everything...There was someone else there with me, his body naked... He's braced over me, pressed against my back,

he twists his hips to grind himself against my butt, His fingertips smooth along the sides of my breasts. His exhale steams against my neck. He's heavy. Sensitive parts of me burn to live. I scratch my fingertips against the sheets until they burn with friction. Then he shifted just a bit perhaps it was to kiss me, as I moved to the side the man was no longer faceless, first came the sharp jawline, moving up I saw his defined cheekbones, he was so close that all I could see was his perfectly sculpted lips parted in a gentle sigh and then he moved farther away and I saw him...Jimin

I jolted up from my bed with a racing heart and beads of sweat glistening on my forehead, I just had a wet dream about Jimin. I couldn't decide what to do. Finish the job, or take a cold shower? In the end, all I do is lie there. RING RING I hear my phone buzz, its Fumi

"I had a dream...uhh a wet dream...about Jimin"

"Good morning to you too?" Fumi replies and then continues with "You've been at each others' butt for the past 6 years this had to happen" I let out a sigh as I'm still processing what had happened "Y/n, let go get Starbucks and you can rant while I nod ok?"

"yeah," I replied as I remembered the time I first met Jimin.

________________________________________________________________________________

It was a sunny afternoon in the bustling city of Seoul, I just graduated from beauty school, Being one of the top students, I was given job offers from several makeup studios, But I had a target, I wanted to work under Jung Saem Mool, she is one of the most talented and renowned artists out there, she usually works with celebrities however with luck in my favor I actually had an offer from her studio. My life has finally taken the turn I had always dreamed.

Months passed and as time flew Jung Saem Mool's reputation also grew, she announced that we will be working under a label from now on, which happened to be HYBE. I was thrilled about the opportunity to work with such a prestigious label and potentially get the chance to work with some big names in the industry.

As fate would have it, one of those big names turned out to be none other than Jimin's. I couldn't believe my luck when my name got announced while they were forming teams.

"He is so well-behaved, we will have a good time working together", Fumi whispered, I met her in the studio, well you could say we bonded over our shared obsession with K-drama and K-pop.

The first time I laid eyes on Jimin, my heart skipped a beat as he walked into the green room to get ready for a shoot, his presence radiated charisma no wonder he is the It-boy of Korea. I glanced at him, as he shot his killer smile to everyone, "Hello everyone!" he greeted " Thank you for having me here, I hope to have a successful shoot with you all, FIGHTING" he put his fists up making us all mimic his gesture, He is so dreamy.

As I'm still a newcomer...kinda, I was a backup for the lead makeup artists, they were way more experienced than me so it did make sense, I would sometimes help with the brushes, go get water for everyone, and sit around doing nothing

Brushes-water-chair

BRUSHES-WATER-CHAIR

BRUSHES-WATER-CHAIR

If you haven't noticed, my excitement level dropped, I get it that I'm inexperienced WELL HOW CAN I LEARN IF IM NOT DOING ANYTHING? I looked over to Fumi across the room, we shared the same state. All that excitement for nothing

"Well, it didn't go as we expected it to go," I said with a scowl on my face. "I was ranting to Lucy, a while ago, apparently it took her two years to actually start working. TWO YEARS Y/N TWO YEARS!" Fumi exclaimed, clearly frustrated with our current situation, I fake cried at her outburst, dramatically wiping away my nonexistent tears. "I mean it's like getting paid for sitting around...it's not so bad" Fumi chuckled at my comment "Hey at least our assigned client turned out to be a good one...he is so, picture perfect" I can't help but think of the pressure that must be on him to maintain his picture-perfect status, Thats pitiful at the same time it's impressive.

Days passed, and my interactions with Jimin were limited to brief greetings or when I was fetching water from the team. "Y/n, can you grab me a water bottle?" Jimin asked with a smile as he pointed to the table of stacked drinks, I nodded grabbing the water bottle and handing it to him returning the smile.

"Gather round, everyone!" the manager called out, holding everyone in a circle as we gathered, eagerly anticipating what the manager had to say. "I hope everyone is here, anyways...Jimin will be shooting live today, so I want no mess-ups or delays, got it?" The manager's words hung in the air as we all nodded in agreement. As time progressed the day became hectic with the crew rushing around to ensure everything was in place. I found myself caught up in the whirlwind of activity, trying my best to assist wherever I could.

At one point, I got tasked with touching up Jimin's make-up FINALLY SOME WORK "Just put a little mascara, it will lift his eyes"

I carefully applied the mascara to Jimin's lashes, trying my best to be precise and not let my nervousness show. As I focused on my task, Jimin glanced at me through the mirror and smiled. And that smile, oh that smile. That smile sent my heart racing and my palms sweating. My fingers trembled slightly as I continued to apply the mascara, trying to keep my composure despite the growing butterflies in my stomach. "You're doing great," Jimin said, his voice filled with genuine appreciation. ANGEL

The shot was ready, and as Jimin stepped on stage, the crowd erupted in cheers. The energy in the room was electric, and I couldn't help but feel a sense of pride knowing that I had played a small part in getting him ready for this moment. As Jimin performed, his talent radiated from the stage, captivating everyone in the audience. It was at that moment that I truly understood why Jimin had such a dedicated fanbase.

The stage was interesting, filled with vibrant lights, smoke machines and sprinkle heads 

hey they use it to make rain in the movies, rain,

RAIN AS IN WATER. 

The realization hit me the mascara I used was not waterproof, by the time I could tell my supervisor about my mistake, It was too late and Jimin's face was already covered in the streaks of black liquid running down his cheeks, I saw the panic in my supervisor's eyes as she rushed to me 

"DID YOU NOT USE WATERPROOF MASCARA" I froze at the moment, a feeling of fear and guilt washed over me as I stammered out an apology.

Chapter 03 will soon be posted today, after you know the editing. I HOPE YOU LIKE THIS CHAPTER

Chapter 01 || Chapter 03

[crmsnmth]

September Sky Chapter Six, Part 4

I always hated the feeling after therapy. She was really good at putting thoughts in my head that I didn't know how to really deal with anymore. I tried to ignore them, but she was able to force them out. It probably was the healthier option instead of stuffing everything down and burying it to become a tumor in ten years. This time, I had no choice but to admit she was right, like usual. Addison was bringing out a part of me that I had thought died. She made me want to be human again. I could breathe again. I was completely and totally fucked.

The bus came, and I crawled to the back, staring out the window. A small handful of other riders sat in random seats. I tried focusing on the music, even singing a little a bit to 'Cruise Control.' It didn't matter though, as it didn't quiet not one single thought floating in my brain. Am I really going to do this? Is this really going to happen again? What if it all turns out the same? What if I'm proven right? I mean, I couldn't see Addison becoming the monster Emily was, but I didn't see Emily having fangs and claws either. The entire bus ride was filled with rapid fire questions I didn't know how to answer.

Work was dead when I finally walked up to it. There was no lunch rush today, and only two cars that weren't employees sat taking up space on the asphalt. I walked in and saw a group of five sitting at a table just finishing up their lunch. Amber smiled after she caught my eye, and I headed over to the bar. It was empty, so that meant we shared a shot.

"Hey, Nugget. What's happening?" I asked, hopping up on a stool. I didn't even take off my backpack or my jacket.

"Nothing all that much. A few dry martini's," she nodded towards the table. "How's things going for you?" She grabbed a bottle of Jameson and poured both of us a shot. The people at the table shot us a strange look as we both slammed the shot glasses back onto the bar.

"There going somewhere. I'm guessing Skeletor's in back?" This was our deja vu conversation. We had it pretty much everyday we worked together. Almost the exact words even.

Amber nodded at me. "Of course."

"So what was he showing you on his phone the other night? Maybe a good thing?" I liked to tease her about the schoolyard crush she had on Justin. I still couldn't understand why she didn't just say something. It was obvious he had a thing for her. All you had to do was watch how they interacted at the end of the night.

"No, just showing me some video he thought was funny." Amber sighed.

"Was it funny?" I looked at her with a raised eyebrow.

"No, not really." She laughed.

"You know, it wouldn't hurt you to tell him."

"I can't do that."

"Why not?"

"I just can't. It'd be so embarrassing."

"How do you know he doesn't like you in the same way?"

"I don't." She grabbed a white rag and started wiping the bar down. It was her nervous habit, what she went to when she wanted a conversation to stop. The bar was as clean as it possibly could be and wiping it was pointless. It was just something that she could do with her hands.

"I really think you should say something, Nugget. At least than you could stop torturing yourself."

She looked at me, and let out an exasperated sigh. "I know."

"There's always the option that I could let something slip in the kitchen one night." I smirked at her. She wouldn't let any of us who knew tell him. Sometimes it felt like it wasn't high school, but more like middle school instead.

"You promised me!" She practically shouted. I couldn't help but start laughing. I did promise I wouldn't tell him, but it wasn't a promise I made because I wanted to. She had made me. That promise also didn't stop from dropping obvious hints to Justin all the time.

[hotchs-second-wife]

DON'T BLAME ME || 1 || Jay Halstead / Thea Rhodes

Synopsis: Theodosia Rhodes, the youngest daughter of a big-time Chicago CEO, needs a husband of her own choice before her father makes that decision for her. Jason Halstead, newly-made Intelligence detective, needs a wife to inherit his portion of his mother's inheritance.

Warnings: Mentions of arson, kidnapping, murder, rape; allusion to childhood trauma, suicide, cancer-related death; descriptions of vehicular accidents including, but not limited to, car-on-car collision, car-on-truck, train; outright familial/parental pressure; portrayal of misogyny and misandry. Read ahead at your own risk.

THEODOSIA

My phone buzzed against the bar shelf, as I slid two Long Island ice teas. The constant vibrantions from my pocket annoyed me, so lately I kept a box under the bar for employees to leave their phones if they wanted.

"Should probably answer that," Matt chided from my right. Despite the crowd in Molly's, he could still hear my phone on vibrate. Granted, we were trained to hear the littlest things.

Kelly laughed beside him. "I can guarantee it's the old man or the sister."

"More likely my sister," I snorted, pulling out another bear for them. "Less talk about my familial pressure for marriage and more drinking, boys."

"You don't need our money, you're richer than the entire department," Kelly frowns.

"I do need to pay my employees though, and I'd rather use the money made from this place than my allowance." Considering I own Molly's and not Cornelius. "I might own a department store but Molly's isn't in cahoots with Dolan Rhodes, and I'd rather keep it that way."

Kelly raised his beer in agreement, before I set off to serve other customers. I tend to the usual, everyday regulars that I only ever see in the bar and not at my full-time job, then head over to the officers and detectives sitting at the very end of my bar.

"Good evening, Lieutenant," Antonio nodded once politely, earning a light smack from me. "You might work with my sister, but I'm not getting kicked out for pissing off the bartender."

I snickered, "you have a lot more than getting kicked out to worry about, Antonio. I know all your dirty little secrets. Everyone bullshits to the bartender."

"Just the usual, Rhodes," Atwater laughed between him and Ruzek. I grabbed the men their usual drinks, moving on to cleaning the glasses in the sink.

Ruzek, amidst his friends' conversation, looked at me over his bottle. "My sister's finished med school, and I know your old man donates to Chicago Med."

"And you want me to put in a good word for her?" I nodded over his head. "Which one is she?"

"She doesn't drink, knowing the risks as a doctor and all."

I smiled. "Like her already. I'll put in a good word, as long as you bring her next time. We got a stock of non-alcoholics out back for when we have shift the next day."

Ruzek thanked me and returned to conversation with his co-workers. I heard my name called, following the voice to Gabby Dawson, one of the best paramedics I know and a damn good barkeep.

"You've met Severide's sister," Gabby waved a hand at Brooklyn Severide.

"How could I not when I babysit her niece?"

Brooklyn raised her glass to me, "my niece's mother, you mean."

"You got a kid?" One detective Jay Halstead asked me.

That particular detective that seduced one of my greatest friends, a non-blood sister, and lied to her for the sake of undercover work. He then proceed to let Molly's get set on fire, the one bar owned and worked by firefighters, and broke up with her in the end. I still wanted to kick his ass for that.

Mostly for Gabby, but also for Molly's. My poor baby.

I raised my head a little. "Best friend's kid, lost her mom. I try to be the mother she deserves." To say I'm still a little apprehensive of the detective would be an understatement.

"And you are," Brooklyn held my arm in her hand, before going back to her drink. "Best damn woman in the world, this one."

I see what's happening.

"Fire lieutenant, great with kids, animals and the elderly. Great with cops too. Did I mention she scaled a two story house to get a cat out of a tree because the truck ladder was stuck?" Brooklyn, a little tipsy already, latched onto Halstead's wrist.

He laughed. For such a dick, the laugh was cute. Really brought out a young side to him. Too bad he's a liar. "About a million times, Brooke. You tried to scout her off to Atwater this morning."

"You did?" I deadpanned. In the near decade I'd known her, Brooklyn had been trying to set me up with men—and women when I came out to her—left and right. I was too good for her brother, apparently. I doubted she realised her brother was also like a brother to me.

It just so happened that his daughter looks more like me with her gorgeous brown hair and brown eyes, and likes to call me Mommy whenever her dad brings her over.

"He's a handsome man, Rho, and he'd take good care of you." Brooklyn excused, turning back to Halstead. "Did I mention benefits? Also she's rich, so that's its own benefit."

She's trying to set me up with this dickwad.

"I'm not that urgent for a wife," Halstead shook his head at Brooklyn, keeping his arm out under his partner's hand.

Kelly called across the room to me, "Mom, baby's calling for you!" That got me there in two seconds. Elizabeth Severide was the cutest little girl in existence, and she would be gorgeous as she got older. The Italian in her would bring that out in her.

She was in every way her dad's daughter, from the smile down to the attitude. The Severide siblings were already a lot to deal with, and to pile on a mini-version of Kelly? I couldn't say no to Elli's little face though.

Elizabeth lost her mother when she was born, and the moment Kelly met his baby girl, I had been with him and encouraged him to at least see her before deciding to let her maternal grandparents take her. He'd asked me an important name to me, in which I said his name or Matt's. They were the closest to brothers I had since Connor went overseas.

When it came down to girls names, it had to be my mother's. I lost her when I was ten, to depression, but she was still my mother, down to the looks and personality. So he'd named her Elizabeth Leslie, after my mother and his best friend, Shay.

Shay was ecstatic her best friend's kid was named after her, and it happened that her middle name was Elizabeth. More often times than not, she'd call Elli by her middle name because she liked it so much.

"Hi, Mommy!" Elli waved at me over FaceTime through Kelly's phone. She was at the Herrmanns', while I worked and Kelly hung out until it was time for him to head home. "What are you doing?"

"I'm working, Reginetta." I smiled, taking the phone from her dad. She loved the little nickname I called her, since I'd promised her mother's parents I'd teach her Italian. Being privately tutored in a language of my choice helped them agree to let Kelly keep her. "Are you in bed?"

"Cindy said I can stay up until Daddy comes pick up!"

She was the cutest little 4-year-old ever.

"Well Daddy will be home with Christopher soon. Christopher is almost finished working." I took the beer from his hands.

Elli took her eyes off me for a second, looking over the phone. "Lee Henry said you have to marry soon. Do I get a new daddy?"

"No, your daddy will still be your daddy. I can't replace him."

"But Cindy said you're not marrying Daddy."

I nodded. "That's right. I'm marrying a different man, because my daddy tells me to."

"Do you not love Daddy anymore?"

Oh sweet baby. "I love your Daddy as much as I love you, Reginetta. But your Daddy isn't the man for me. He'll marry a good woman who will love you just as much as we do."

"But I don't want another Mommy, or another Daddy!" She cried, tears falling over her chubby cheeks. "Only you and Daddy!"

"It's okay, baby, you won't see my husband unless your Daddy is okay with it, and only if you want to. He'll just be Mommy's husband."

She nodded, little sniffles leaving her nose as Cindy helped her wipe her tears. "Principessa, your Daddy and I will never introduce you to a man or a woman if you don't want to meet them. Besides, you'll probably be much older when we ask about it."

"Daddy said I'll see you o-morrow at the Big House."

My house looked like a downsized version of the firehouse, so she called my house "Mommy's House" and 51 the "Big House". It worked just as well with her calling Chief Boden the "Big Man".

"That's great! Now you get ready for Daddy to come get you, and I'll see you tomorrow, little one." I hung up and gave Kelly a look to find Herrmann. He did just that, taking his phone and leaving a kiss to the side of my head beforehand.

#

Closing up was as easy as cleaning a pig's back. And that was an understatement, given that I know how to clean a pig while they're running around.

With everything locked up in the bar, and the front door locked, I headed out the back where I expected Brooklyn to be. We were planning to finish off Europe trip plans before we passed out, but her car was nowhere to be seen.

"Antonio said she was too drunk to stay any longer, so he took her home." Halstead's voice carried over the small parking lot reserved for Molly's employees and family. He wasn't family; not to the bar owner. "I called Severide, he said I could park here. His sister's best friend and all. You wouldn't mind, according to him."

Brooklyn was too drunk my ass. I served her all her drinks, and when I wasn't, Gabby was. I knew how much she had.

Little shit trying to set me up.

"I'm sure you know just as well as me, but I'm fully aware she's trying to set us up, and I know you're hating it just as much as you hate me."

"I don't hate you." Now you're a freaking liar, Theodosia. "Just, despise you more than the average person."

He laughed, genuinely, while he moved around his truck to open the passenger door for me. "I think there's people that would argue with that. Unlike you, I was a screwed up kid."

"And how would you know what I was like?" I asked, and he shut the door before I even got an answer. Sitting in his car in silence was peaceful, and somehow comforting. An old smell that was awfully familiar ran over my skin.

Halstead shut the driver's door after he sat down. "One, you're the most popular woman in Chicago. Two, you did everything your dad told you to, even if it was clear you didn't enjoy it. Like modelling."

That was the bane of my long existence. I hated it, and thanked whoever had been listening to my prayers that I'd found firefighting and loved it. It was the first decision I made about my career life, and the first decision I made the moment I turned 18.

Connor had wanted to leave America, start his adult life in another country while he studied medicine, but I dug my roots into the ground of the Chicago Fire Department and fought my way through the academy on my own. I made sure the brass didn't accept any money from my old man so I knew I could accomplish something in my own right.

And it wouldn't bite me in the ass later on either. I'd found myself a real family, one where Boden was a better father than my actual one.

"Brooke always talks so highly of you," Halstead mentioned, his eyes on the road.

For as long as I've known Kelly, I've known Brooklyn. Sweet girl, only a year younger than me. I was almost directly in the middle of the Severides, with Kelly three years my senior. Kelly had been my guide right out of the academy, and when Boden wasn't mentoring me, Kelly was taking me over the basics of rescue firefighting. He'd been candidate for a few months before Matt had arrived, then he was bumped up to rescue squad about a month before I appeared.

Matt and Kelly, being a couple years older, wanted me to get close to Brooklyn, since we were closer in age and women. I was 22, and Brooklyn 21, when Kelly took us out drinking for her 21st. Unbeknownst to Brooklyn—or Kelly—one of the guys over at Firehouse 38 had preyed his eyes on the fresh 21-year-old in the bar.

I'd beaten the shit out of him, and Boden had to convince the patrol sergeant in charge not to charge me. That I was a dedicated firefighter that was just shy of 3 weeks from moving up to search squad, and that I didn't need a stained record when the lieutenants were already riding my ass.

I've had Brooklyn glued to my hip at bars since then. She was always great company, and much more of a pleasure to be around than Kelly when she was drunk. A giggly, playful sort.

She looked up to like the older sister she didn't have, and admired that I put my foot down to my father. Something she wishes she could do.

"Yeah, well, Benny and my father aren't all that different. One's just rich and the other one is god knows where." It was true, for the most part. I knew where Benny was, or where he should've been. And I knew he was coming up to Chicago to see his granddaughter.

Halstead agreed. "She said he's a better grandfather than a father."

"Most shit dads tend to be better with other people's kids. Benny's been great to me, but that's just to get on Kelly's good side. Be nice to your granddaughter's mother figure and you get your son happy."

He didn't say anything to that, but I didn't expect him to. As much as I knew about him, which wasn't much since he'd only been Brooklyn's partner for less than a month, but he didn't have all that good a relationship with his dad either. That's mostly why he and Brooklyn were so close as far as I was concerned.

"About that wife thing," Halstead glanced in his rearview mirror. "I need a wife to get my inheritance from my mother. It's been 10 years, and her will lawyer said if neither my brother nor I claim any of the money, it'll just go to my father. She wanted Will and I to have anything she did, since Dad didn't see her right to the end."

Well shit. Here I was being a bitch about him earlier and bitching to Otis about Brooklyn trying to set me up to marry him, and he needs a wife to keep money from his horrid father.

"She mentioned your dad's been on you to marry men twice your age and you're hating it."

"Hating is an understatement. I could pick any one of them out in a line up against my dad and I wouldn't be able to tell you the difference."

Halstead paused, looking at me before he continued. "She suggested I marry you purely to get your dad off your ass and my inheritance from my dad."

"How long do you have?"

"A week. My mom died 10 years ago on Friday."

A husband—a detective husband at that—would get my father to back off. He could get the inheritance he's keeping from his father, and I'd get to live my life in peace from an unwanted marriage.

"Okay, you have a deal."

[empressofthesunwriter]

Kick the cat out of the bag!

Warning: If you like Adrien Agreste/Chat Noir you should turn back because I'm salty at this boy and the creators of this show and I won't hold back.

If you feel the same, enjoy with me this trip down the salty road.

Chapter 3: The first entry: The Nightingale doesn't sing

Author Note: Hi, guys, I finished this chapter early than I thought, and I was like: “Well, why not just publish it?”. So here we are. Also, I want to state that this is a rare case, normally my schedule is very hectic and messy, so don’t expect to have every three days a chapter. My goal is to do an upload once a week. Also after I counted the votes you all seemed to like Kickat so the blog is now called that and I changed it the previous chapter. The name Kickat came from my dear reader DSpaceZ from AO3 so all credits to them! Thank you for the amazing name friend. Also if you have time check their own salt story about Adrien/Chat! I promise you it’s fantastic! With that, I wish you happy reading! :D

"So are you ready for this?", asked Luka holding your phone in his hands.

You nodded, sitting comfortably on your desk chair, and took a deep breath to calm your nerves.

It was afternoon, after school, and after your nightly discussion.

It was time to get started on the Kickat -Blog. You would be lying if you said you weren't nervous. 

Would anyone even take note of your guy's blog with the Ladyblog being so famous and so full of LadyNoir? You could only hope that there were still some people left with critical thinking skills and would realize what you and Luka had.  

You needed a lot of people on your side to fulfill your goal.

With a last little prayer that anything would turn out in your guy's favour, you gave Luka the signal to start recording. He gave you a thumbs-up in return and you started to talk.

"Hello all citizens of Paris.", you started with a greeting. "You don't know me or me you, but we all live in this beautiful city together. My name is [Y/N] [L/N] or you can call me Harmony. Behind the camera is my best friend Luka Couffaine. We will not hide, because we’re not scared. You can talk and write to us without a problem because we know the truth is on our side. Which truth do you ask? Well, yesterday I saw, took pictures, and recorded something and showed it to my partner which broke not only my trust and faith in one of our heroes his too. The hero in question is Chat Noir. Yes, you heard right, Chat Noir. We will post the photos with the time stamps and the video after this one, so you can see for yourself what kind of hero he is. Spoiler-Alert: he isn't one and we all have to help Ladybug to get a partner that she deserves. But we will leave you first to the proofs."

Luka stopped the recording. Then he sits down beside you on your desk chair. You already were turned around to face your computer and took wordless from him your phone. You upload the photos and both videos to your newly created blog and let out a shuddering breath.

There you have done it.

Now you had to wait.

Alya Cèsaire could say for herself that she was the most informed, most up-to-date on anything Ladybug and Chat Noir-related.

Not only because she was nearly always there when an Akuma battle took place, no, but she also had dozens or so alerts installed on any social media platform if some lucky civilian took a great video or photo of Paris superhero couple.

She always gave them credits of course when she posted them under her Ladyblog.

Sometimes she had a feeling people battle against each other to have a place in her blog. Well, it was the most famous and the most popular! And also the only one, but she ignored this little detail. So the moment you created your blog and posted the photos and videos she was one of the first to see it, thanks to her alerts.

Since she had nothing better to do than to wait for Marinette to change into the Ladybug costume so her friend could play the role in Clara Nightingales’ music video, she turned to Alix, Juleka, Rose, and Mylène and waved her phone around.

“Hey, guy’s I got a new scoop. Want to watch it with me, while we wait for Marinette?”

“Oh, what is it about?”, asked Rose eager and moved beside her.

The other girls followed her lead and looked at Alya phone screen.

“It’s from a new blog.”, started Alya. “It’s called Kickat. Mmh, that’s a bit of a strange name.”

“Sounds like someone is angry at Chat Noir if you ask me.”, said Alix interested.

“Why would anybody be angry at Chat Noir?”, asked Mylène confused. He was such a good hero!

Rose and Alya nodded, meanwhile Juleka stared at the thumbnail and recognize your face.

“That’s [Y/N].”, she mumbled to herself.

The other girls looked at her surprised.

“You know the chick?”, asked Alya to clarify.

“She is my brother’s best friend.”

“And?”, came it from Alix. She had a feeling that there was more.

“Well, [Y/N] hates injustice and any kind of hate against people that exist. One time a guy hit on me and before Luka or I could say to shove it, [Y/N] just straight up punched him in the face and told him she would castrate him if he doesn’t leave me alone. She broke his chin and he needed two new teeth’s.”, told them Juleka and you could see in her eyes the deep respect she holds for you.

Alix lets out a whistle and grins. She liked people who weren’t afraid to act to help someone even with a fist.

Alya, Rose, and Mylène had big eyes. You were sure a person not to mess with, this was clear.

“Okay, she smashes the faces of pervy sexually harassing guys, which is awesome.”, said Alya. This was a good point in her book. “But why are you telling us this?”

Juleka looked serious into Alya’s eyes.

“If she named her blog Kickat and it was under one of your alerts, then Chat Noir did something horrifying.”

Needlessly to say that shocked the other girls.

“Why is no one responding to the blog?”, you asked Luka nervous.

You were walking around your room in circles and tried to not get crazy. Dear heaven, if your concerns turned true and no one would realize what a piece of shit Adrien was even with the photos and video?

Luka was sitting on your bed and watched you walking around.

“Harmony, give it some time. I needed it too after I saw it. That’s a lot to take in.”, he reminded you.

Suddenly you both heard your computer beep.

There!

Someone had sent your blog a message.

Like an Akuma was after you, you run to your desk chair to sit in and check the message. You blinked, not believing, who messaged you.

“Luka.”, you called him over in trance. “The Ladyblog messaged me.”

“What did she write?”, he asked couriers.

You read for him aloud: “Hi girl, this is Alya from the Ladyblog as you can see. I saw the photos and watched the video. I even have here Juleka with me, who confirms that you wouldn’t play this kind of prank, but I need to ask because I just can’t believe it. Is this real?”

“She is really asking that?”, wonders Luka. “If Jules is with her she should take her word.”

“You forget we are talking also to an avid LadyNoir shipper.”, you reminded him.

Grimly you began to tip in a message to Alya.

Yes, hi Alya from the Ladyblog. I wish this was a prank but it is 100% true. You can even ask my parents who drowned if you are still unsure!

Sorry, Harmony, can I call you that? Anyway sorry, I can’t imagine how you or your parents feel, but if this is true…then Chat Noir is the worst hero ever!

Yes, you can call me Harmony. Alya he is. Please think about it. Have you seen him actually doing his job right? Or is he only making fun and bothering Ladybug with his flirting?

For a few minutes, there weren’t any new messages, you worried that Alya wouldn’t believe you, till you saw a new message.

Girl, me and my friends have a meltdown right here! After you wrote that we checked my Ladyblog and…well, what we saw now, wasn’t a good kind hero, but a sexually harassing bastard who couldn’t careless for us and Paris! My friend Alix is ready to fist fight him and my other friends Rose and Mylène are crying for Ladybug. Juleka seems like she is planning a murder. And I feel sick that I supported LadyNoir at all. Good, I’m the worst journalist ever. It’s like I, we had all the time a blindfold on!

You let out a breath and thanked god. She and her friends saw the truth. With the Ladyblog on your side, you would get all of Paris to see reasons.

I had the same feeling Alya, don’t worry. I just ask you to help get rid of Chat Noir as a hero. He needs to lose his ring and Ladybug needs a better partner.

Don’t worry I will feature your video and photos on my blog and clean it from Chat Noir. But first I need to stop this music video shoot! TTYL!

You blinked surprised.

“Music video shoot?”, you said out loud.

“What is it, [Y/N]?”, wanted to know Luka.

You just pointed at your messages. Luka read them and then nodded.

“Right, I forgot. Jules told me Clara Nightingale is searching today for extras and a Ladybug for her new music video. She is there with her friends to play as extras.”

“Well, sounds like to me that no music video is going to be made.”

As Marinette came out of the closet where she put on the duplication of her superhero suit the last thing she expected to see and hear were people with phones in their hands, who were talking over each other. Some were crying, others shouting and Alya stood grimly beside Clara Nightingale, who gripped Alya’s phone in her hands hard. Adrien, in his Chat Noir costume, seemed also to be confused about what was going on.

“What’s up?”, she asked her other friends.

“Oh, Marinette it’s terrible!”, cried Rose and hugged her tight. Stunned she patted the back of her friend. “Chat Noir is so…so…mean!”

“You mean, he is a number one bastard and sexual abuser.”, corrected Alix with crossed arms and an angry look on her face.

Marinette swore her brain just paused for a second. What was she hearing?

“Look at this Marinette, please.”, sniffled Mylène and hold her phone out to her.

“Yeah, this will clear things up quickly and we can go cat hunting.”, mumble Juleka with a dangerous glimmer in her eyes that Marinette had never seen.

“Juleka!”, shouted Rose.

“Don’t shout at her, she is right. The fucker needs at least a good kick in the nuts for all the shit he did!”, cursed Alix.

Before Marinette could even look at the video Mylène wanted to show her or decipher Alix’s words Clara called out to her.

The singer had given Alya her phone back and Adrien was now standing beside her. He seemed still to be as confused as herself.

“Marinette, please come here, I have to clear something with Adrien and you there.”

So still confused Marinette got up the stage and felt Alya pat her back as she passed her. What was that for?

Clara took Adrien’s and one of her hands and looked at them both sadly.

“I’m sorry you two and to Mister Agreste but I won’t make this video under this new progress.”

“New progress?”, parroted Adrien and Marinette together. If she wasn’t so lost, she would have swooned at how synchro she and Adrien were.

It seemed like the universe didn’t want that she finally understood what was going on because Mayor Bourgeois walked back in with a stack of papers and a smug Chloe by his side.

“I'm sorry. My administrative staff just realized you never submitted permit A38 as stipulated in the circular B65 that one can only get at counter C, third floor of City Hall, which is, alas, closed for renovations until August, which means you don't have a permit to shoot...anywhere in France, including Paris.”, said Mayor Bourgeois and handed Clara the stack of papers.

Clara just looked him straight into the eyes and rhymed: “Don’t worry, Mister Mayor, sir, I was about to go. I would never shoot a video for such an enormous asshole. Chat Noir can go to hell, for all I care. I’m just sorry for Ladybug, the poor dear.”

Nobody couldn’t tell if the Mayor and Chloe were that shocked because Clara didn’t even fight back or because she cursed, but Marinette was sure shocked hearing the normal sweet Clara cursing out her superhero partner.

Even Adrien seemed shocked.

“Miss Clara, what do you mean?”, asked the boy sweetly.

It wasn’t Clara who responded to him, but a woman in line for the extras.

“She means that stunt Chat Noir pulled yesterday or should I say didn’t pull.”

Others talked too.

“I never realized what a lazy bum he was!”

“You mean how we never realized that he abuses Ladybug?! I think that is more important!”

“Hey, I drowned yesterday, and not that it isn’t terrible how he treats Ladybug, but I did die and maybe I didn’t need to die if he was doing his job!”

“He never does his job because he thinks with his dick, Karen!”

“Yeah! God, I feel disgusted that I even shipped LadyNoir!”

“It is disgusting even shipping real people! How come we never realized that?”

“An Akuma?”

“If that is so then Papillion is an even bigger dick than I already thought!”

More and more voices got louder and Marinette felt sick. What was going on? Why was anybody so angry at Chat Noir?

Sure, she was angry at him sometimes too but…no she can’t think about it, she can’t lose her nerves, she has to be careful because of the Akumas.

Don’t think about it.

Don’t think about it!

Please, don’t think about it!

Paris comes first, you last!

Don’t forget that.

Marinette feels how someone, Alya, wraps an arm around her shoulders and leads her down the stage.

“C’mere, girl, we will tell you what happened. But we need you to first get you out of the costume.”

So she followed.

You and Luka stared in awe at the growing number on your blog and how anybody seemed to agree with you.

It was a fantastic feeling!

“It’s working, Luka, it’s really working!”, you said and you both hugged each other happy.

The first entry was a success!

And now the real battle began.

Next

[sunnyie-eve]

9 | Boys...

Series: Valentine Addams | Wednesday

Paring: (Xavier Thorpe x OFC Addams! Tyler Galpin x OFC Addams!)

Word Count: 1989

Warnings: fighting about Tyler, connecting, light flirting

8. Making Enemies | 10. Festival

On the way ride back to a school I could tell Weems wasn't happy just by her facial expressions. "Your first day and you're already on Sheriff's Galpin's radar. Wish I could say I was surprised. Now, Valentine, you have been doing great for months. Why start to act up when your sister arrives?" Weems sighs. 

"I was standing up for my sister. And what did he mean about our father?" I ask because I knew he wasn't capable of that. 

"I have no idea, but I have a word of advice for you Miss Wednesday. Stop making enemies and start making a few friends. You're gonna need them." She tells Wednesday before we pass an accident and Wednesday says the man broke his neck.

"Miss Valentine." Weems stops me as we arrive at school. 

"Yes?" I walk over to her as Wednesday leaves. 

"Did you know your sister was going to make a run for it?" She watches me. 

"I had a feeling because I know how she is but when she came into the café she told me it ended early and you were busy on the phone." I lie to her. 

"And you believed her?" She crosses her arms. 

"Well we normally don't lie to each other. This was the first time." I tell the truth but also lie to her. 

"Valentine, please don't go getting in trouble with your sister. I understand she is your sister but you've been going so good here. I have big hopes for you." She sighs so I nod my head before going to my room to change out of my uniform into something comfortable.

Bored after some hours of reading in my room, I end up going to Wednesday and Enid's dorm room to see Wednesday talking to Thing, "When did you catch him? I caught him outside the nurses." I laugh walking over to her bed. 

"When I was writing I felt him spying on me." She glares at him. 

"There's no way father killed someone. If he did it on purpose he would have told us that as a bedtime story." I change the topic. 

"I know that's why I want to know what the sheriff meant. I want to know whole story." She sighs.

"Val, Xavier wants you in the quad." Enid pops her head into the room. 

"He would've just text or call me? Plus it's dark out." I ask her confused. 

"I don't know. Just go to the boy. I gonna go do some homework with Yoko." She leaves in a rush. 

"These people kill me." I get up groaning. 

"You choose to make friends." Wednesday tells me. 

"I know that." I leave her room going down to the quad. 

On the way there I bump into Rowan as he was in a hurry and end up getting a vision of him looking for a book in a library I haven't seen. I watch him rushing away confusing me why I would get that vision. Letting out a breath of air I continue my way outside to see Xavier working on his art he hasn't finished yet.

"Enid, said you wanted me." I walk up behind him so he turns to look at me, 

"Enid said that?" He ask bringing his brows together. 

"Yeah, I was with Wednesday and she piped her head into the room saying you wanted me in the quad." I tell him exactly what she told me. 

"I haven't spoken to her today." He laughs still confused and I get what she was trying to do. 

"I swear... I'm going to do something when she's sleeping." I huff shaking my head. 

"If I needed you I would have text or called you." He turns back to his work. 

"That's what I said but she said just go to you." I lean against the wall watching him. 

"If you knew that why did you still come?" He glances over smiling at me. 

"I don't know..." I shrug my shoulders, "I hear a friend needs me so I go."

"Well I don't need you but you're welcome to stay and watch me paint." He smiles and I can't help but smile. I loved his smile with his dimples. Oh my, did I really just say that to myself? "Has Rowen been acting odd lately? I just bumped into him. He seemed in a rush." I ask curious and I notice his body language. 

"Umm, yeah. A little. He won't talk to me about it." He makes sure not to look at me so I focus on him. "Please don't ask me anymore. It's hard not to tell you the whole truth. I hate lying to you." I hear him talk to himself. 

"You wouldn't lie to me right?" I cross my arms watching him. 

"Why would I lie to you?" He awkwardly chuckles. 

"I don't know it just seems like you are with your body language and the way you sound." I say so he turns to face me.

"I'm telling you the truth. He wouldn't talk about it to me when I ask what's up. He starts to get annoyed then raises his voice at me." He sighs and I could tell he was telling some of the truth so I just drop it. He goes back to painting and I sit on the ground leaning against the wall watching. 

Soon I start to zone out going into my own thoughts. What did I feel for theses stupid boys? Both are great friends and I connect with both but which one do I connect with the most? Xavier and I have things in common but so do Tyler and I in a different way. If or when I ever choose one how will my relationship be with the other? How will I know if I don't try see with each? How? How? How? How? I let out a groan making Xavier ask what's wrong. 

"Huh, just thinking."

"About what?" He keeps painting. 

"Me, my thoughts." I close my eyes letting out a sigh. 

"Tyler probably." I hear his thoughts. 

"Will you shut up about Tyler?" I get annoyed. 

"What?" He looks at me confused. "It's been months so get used to it. He's my friend whether you like it or not." I get up off the ground. 

"Why are you suddenly being up his name?" He looks at me like I was crazy. 

"Because you did first. Tyler probably. Yeah you kinda said that out loud." I lie to him. 

"I did? I thought I said that in my head." He looked lost. 

"Well you didn't." I kinda gaslight him so he doesn't know my new power.

"Valentine, what do you even see in him? Even as just a friend." He turns to face me annoyed. 

"I see a lonely person. Someone people don't understand. Being someone who most don't understand as well, I see someone I can talk to. And besides all that, he's a good friend to me. He's only ever been kind to me." I explain to him and he rolls his eyes. "You know, Xavier... You aren't helping yourself in any way acting like this. We butt heads over something stupid so I can't imagine us a serious situation." I eye him walking off done with him.

As I walk into my dorm Enid was getting ready to leave, "I swear I'm going to do something when you're sleeping you liar." I give her a glare. 

"Did you come in angry because of me or did something?" She asks me. 

"Both. He brought up Tyler again when I told him to shut up about him." I lay down on my bed. 

"He's just jelly." She says leaving the room. 

"Boys are complicated. That's why I don't deal with them." Yoko speaks up. 

"You and Divina are complicated at times..." I look over at her. 

"I said boys! Don't bring up me." She turns to face me causing me to laugh.

-

For my Wednesday session with Dr. Kinbott she makes me talk about how it is with Wednesday being at Nevermore the entire time. "See you on Sunday, Valentine." She opens the door for me to leave. 

"Valentine." I hear the Sheriff's voice as I make it outside the building. 

"Sheriff?" I look up at him. 

"I'm still going to keep an eye on you and your sister but I kinda know how you are from being here for long so just don't act up again. Especially with the Mayor's son." He gives me a look. 

"Again, I jumped in to stand up for my sister but I understand." I give him a head nod. 

"Tyler's on his fifteen. Thought you'd liked to know since you two are.. like... friends." He heads off so I head over to the café.

I see him sitting in a booth with his back facing the door, "Shit... no. No...no! Damn it!" I hear him thinking to himself so I walk over sitting across from him. 

"I ran into you dad." I startle him taking my seat. 

"What did he say?" He groans. 

"Just that he's still keeping an eye on me but since he sorta knows me just stay out of trouble. And that I'd might like to know you're on your break." I sum it up. 

"He let you know about me?" He gives me a funny confused look. 

"Yep, since we're... like... friends." I tell him how his dad said it.

"Like... friends? We are friends." He laughs, "You know, I thought you were mad at me because you haven't answered any of my text since Monday." His eyes scan my face. 

"No, no. I'm not mad at you. I muted everyone because of Xavier. He pissed me off and started to try to apologize." I shake my head then rest my chin on my right arm propped up. 

"Me?" He sighs so I hum a yes. "He needs to get over it. We've been friends for months." He rolls his eyes. 

"Asked what do I see in you? Even as just a friend." I look down at the table. 

"And you said?"

"I see a lonely person. Someone people don't understand. Being someone who most don't understand as well, I see someone I can talk to. And besides all that, he's a good friend to me. He's only ever been kind to me." I look up to make eye contact with him.

"You make this so difficult... You're killing me." Tyler thinks to himself as he stares at me making me smile. "What" He chuckles. 

"That stupid look in your eyes." I roll mine. 

"Why you staring into my eyes?" He starts to smile. 

"Where else am I supposed to look when talking to someone?" I tilt my head. 

"Why are you smiling so much?" He laughs more so I shake my head. "I thought we can talk to each other?" He leans onto the table. 

"You're gonna make fun of me or think something different than what I mean." I whine. 

"Tell me." He playfully kicks me under the table.

"I'm saying this as a friend, I love your smile and your eyes. Sometimes they get this like little twinkle." I explain getting embarrassed. 

"Saying this as a friend and when I first met you, I love your smile too. I could tell how genuine they are compared to the fake ones. The fake ones are nice too though."

"Are you going to the Harvest Festival this weekend? For us Nevermore students it's mandatory." I changed the topic. 

"I wasn't thinking about going but now I might have a reason to go." He says with a smile. 

"Well hopefully you make an appearance. Even if it's just for a second." I get up seeing my ride pull up. 

"Hey, try not to ignore my texts." He says as I start to walk out. 

"Can't make a promise." I send him a wink leaving.