#and gandalf being the king of socialization

[nolonger-roses]

Now, the fellowship was really a mix of people who were somehow coneccted to each other, like Aragorn and Legolas knew each other and Gandalf. The hobbits are family to each other (and do NOT get me started on Sam and Frodo bcs I will lose it) and Boromir also knew Gandalf.

But the best is Gimli looking at Frodo after his dad told him how he had to endure his king (relative) for MONTHS pinning over a hobbit who, by destiny, is the uncle of the same hobbit whom he has to protect

Just crazy af if you ask me

[eglerieth]

Some of y’all are not appreciating Bilbo Baggins enough. I am here to remedy that. This guy has:

• somehow managed to establish himself as a respectable, staid hobbit by the time he was fifty, despite being both a grandson of Bullroarer Took and the Shire champion of pretty much every aiming-game known to hobbitkind

• had an in-depth debate on pleasantries with a random guy passing by in the street, who turned out to be GANDALF

• collapsed in front of his own fire shaking and muttering “struck by lightning” over and over again in response to hearing about dragons and danger

• mind you, this was after he screamed loud enough to startle a roomful of Dwarves

• signed up for a dangerous quest completely outside of his league out of spite

• when told to scout out a mysterious light, saw some trolls, and instead of reporting back with the information, decided to PICK THE TROLLS POCKET

• arrived in Rivendell for the first time and said it “smelled like elves”

• upon meeting a strange creature that visibly wanted to eat him, he decided to play a riddle game with him- and guessed pretty much every one, and made up his own riddles, afraid and alone, that not only were good and full of linguistic puns, but actually stumped the other guy- AND THEN CHEATED AND WON WITH A QUESTION

• showed mercy to said strange creature who wanted to kill him, and was now standing between him and freedom

• eavesdropped on the dwarves arguing over whether to try to save him, then popped up casually smack in the middle of them just as they were debating

• somehow managed to sleep like a log at the really really high eyrie full of wild predators

• found himself in a bad situation, said eff it, and turned around and antagonized and fought off an insane amount of man eating spiders, like enough of them that fifty was a small portion, by singing at them with incredibly complex and punny insulting songs composed on the spot, while simultaneously slaying them in multitudes despite having zero combat training. Seriously, we don’t discuss enough how epic the spider scene is.

• broke a company of dwarves out of the very secure prison of the Elvenking by inventing white water rafting with barrels

• charmed his way out of being eaten by a dragon

• stole the frickin Arkenstone from the guys who employed him, one of whom was a king

• took part in an epic battle, only to be knocked out in the first ten minutes and miss the entire thing

• was named elf-friend by the guy who’s prisoners he sprung

• wrote his own autobiography, complete with all the narrative recognition of his own heroics

• spent 60 years writing said autobiography

• taught his lower class neighbor’s kid how to read

• taught his nephew Elvish- not only Sindarin, but Quenya too

• spent decades telling his cousins his own story as fairy tales, complete with character impressions accurate enough that one of them was able to fool a servant of the Enemy with a second hand impression

• used the One Ring of Power to hide from his neighbors

• planned an elaborate feast with multiple social faux pas to mess with his neighbors, complete with a purposefully bewildering speech and culminating in him vanishing into thin air in front of everyone

• left his cousins and neighbors very unsubtle passive aggressive gifts in his will

• settled into Rivendell, randomly befriended the heir to the throne of like half of Middle Earth, and apparently spent his time writing very personal poems about his hosts and reciting them to crowds of elves

• after being invited to a Council of basically every major kingdom in the continent, spent a quarter of the time reciting vague poems about his friends, a quarter of the time telling anyone who would listen about his heroic past, and half the time interrupting to ask when lunch would be

• volunteered to bring the ring to Mordor

• became one of only four or five mortals in history to live in Valinor

Seriously, Bilbo Baggins may well be the most chaotic, insane person in the entire legendarium, and that includes the likes of people like Finrod “bit a werewolf to death to save the life of guy who he just met and gave up his kingdom for” Felagund.

[torchwood-99]

Eowyn and Gothic Horror

I've ranted about the interpretation that Eowyn's rejection of gender roles was a symptom of her sickness, caused only by Grima's manipulations. An interpretation that doesn't hold to either Gandalf's speech in the Houses of Healing, when he specifies how the liberties denied to Eowyn and allowed to Eomer and her male peers played a crucial role in her depression, or when we see how Eowyn was really vindicated in her decision to ride to battle by her victory over the Witch King. A victory that wins her incredible renown and respect.

I think this reading comes about because people see the significance of Grima's contribution to Eowyn's despair, and think he is the sole source of it.

But Eowyn was not dissatisfied with her role and her enforced position in the house because of Grima's manipulations. She didn't rail against sexism because Grima played with her head and "poisoned" her traditionally feminine role for her.

Grima was able to prey on Eowyn, manipulate her and drive her to despair, because of the sexism that forced Eowyn to remain stuck in the house.

Look at the speech Gandalf gives Eomer about Eowyn's sufferings. The very first thing he mentions is the fact that Eowyn was denied the freedoms and opportunities Eomer had. The suffering that follows stems from that first initial injustice.

Because of that first injustice, Eowyn was rendered vulnerable, and Grima was able to exploit that. That isolation, that limited freedom, that unhappiness about her lack of choices, left her free game for Grima to take an already bad situation, and make it far worse.

Thinking about Eowyn's experience in Meduseld, what the impact of being confined to the domestic sphere did to her, and what is left her vulnerable to, makes me think of Gothic horror, and the role of sexism and domesticity in that genre too.

Eowyn's situation before the novels is that of a classic Gothic heroine. A fair, beautiful woman, trapped inside a decaying house, and preyed on by an awful monster, who hungers after her beauty and longs to possess her. Or else, destroy her.

Domestic settings and isolation are pretty crucial themes in the gothic genre, and for that reason it has historically been seen as a woman's genre. It taps into a pretty universal fear of what happens when home ceases to be a safe space, a fear that historically, has a particularly great resonance for women.

Whereas traditionally home is a refuge and respite for men from the world, the home is the woman's only true acceptable sphere. And yet even there she is subordinate. Therefore, she is vulnerable. With no place in the outside world, she has no escape, no respite, no refuge. If home becomes an evil, she is trapped. And because she has no place in the social sphere, she has no voice either. She is invisible, she is overlooked, her sufferings and her contributions are passed over,

Eowyn is isolated. Eowyn is vulnerable. Eowyn is overlooked. And because Eowyn is isolated and vulnerable and overlooked, Grima is able to get his hooks into her and drive her to despair. She is a wild animal, trammelled and caught in a hutch, a predator's helpless prey. But Grima didn't put Eowyn in the hutch. Eowyn was already there. Grima just took advantage of that.

Even after Grima is gone, Meduseld is still a place Eowyn longs to escape, and while its evil is purged and she does return, it is only for a short while. Grima's defeat is not enough to make Meduseld a place where Eowyn can find real happiness or fulfilment. On its own, it still represents a role for Eowyn that she wishes to move beyond.

The healing counterpoint to Eowyn's gothic castle of horrors, the hutch she was caught in, is in escape, and in a return to nature.

Eowyn's entire romance with Faramir takes place within the gardens of the Houses of Healing, where we see Eowyn start to recover from her ordeal. It takes place on the open, in the garden, on the ramparts, with much notice given to the sky and the sun and the elements around them.

(Also, the Houses of Healing themselves are not a domestic setting, but a public one, and there we see women working alongside men and holding authority.)

Eowyn's happy ending, her great escape, climaxes with her decision to go with Faramir to Ithilien.

Ithilien is the exact opposite of a hutch. It's descriptions are filled with natural imagery, and is known as the Garden of Gondor. It is a place for growth and fresh starts. A place of freedom. A place for a wild thing.

When Faramir suggests that he and Eowyn live in Ithilien, he reasserts again and again that they will go there if it is Eowyn's will. Both Tolkien and Faramir put emphasis on the importance of Eowyn's will, and Eowyn's right to freedom of movement.

In his plans for their future, Faramir talks of "us" and "we", removing the separation between men (belonging to the social sphere) and women (belonging to the domestic), and speaks of Ithilien as a shared dwelling place for both of them. Faramir only distinguishes between himself and Eowyn when he puts importance on Eowyn's will, and at the end, on Eowyn's influence.

At the close of his speech, Faramir says all things will grow with joy in Ithilien, if Eowyn is there. Returning Ithilien to its former glory, allowing it to bloom once more, is to become Faramir's life's work, and still it is Eowyn's influence he puts centre stage. Far from being kept confined to the domestic sphere, relegated to being Faramir's home support while he dominates the rehabilitation of Ithilien, Faramir places Eowyn's work and Eowyn's significance at the heart of their future together.

Eowyn goes from being shut in the house, where everything around her was decaying and falling to ruin, to being freed to stand in the heart of nature, where there is a chance for influence, growth, and fresh starts.

[spinningalbinoturtle]

Social Media headcanons

Aragorn

Has an official Instagram and Facebook accounts as a head of state. He also has a private account that his friends follow him on: strideranger alternatively strangerranger or rangerdanger on tiktok. His insta consists solely of pictures of his horse, Arwen and occasionally videos of cool plants or wildlife. He captions thing like an old man. His Tiktok is tracking tutorials and again nature videos. He hates twitter and isn’t on it.

Legolas

All the social medias his names include princeofmirkwood, andmybow, and legolocks. Has over a million followers in insta, tiktok and twitter. He posts lots of glammy photos of himself in the woods and tutorials of how to keep your hair and makeup intact in the battlefield. He also edits slow mows of himself shooting orcs. Doesn’t have Facebook because he claims its “for old people” despite being the second oldest member of the fellowship Posts his random thoughts in twitter and gets like thousands of retweets every time

Gimli

anmyaxe, lordofglitteringcaves, gimlet, are some of his names. Posts angry rants on twitter and faceboo. Regularly gets into internet fights with trolls. Posts videos on tiktok of his various stone projects and his workout routine (the latter gets a lot of views) Everyone loses it when he and Legolas team up for a “elf braid vs dwarf braid” youtube video. Oh yes he also has a very popular youtube channel where he explains how to of various craft trades.

Pippin

Has made foolofatook his name for everything and also a hashtag. Huge on twitter and twitch, he also has insta and tiktok and a youtube channel with Merry. Said Youtube is very popular and involves pranks, media reviews, and him and Merry doing stupid shit

Merry

Does a lot of work on the channel with Pippin. Also has a twitch and twitter. Insta king people think he’s really cool. He is the kind of person who shares his progress on candy crush and duolingo. Tried to make merrychristmas his username but it was taken and so went with theweedprofessor. His tiktok is more popular than Pippin’s but Pippin’s twitter is more popular

Sam

Not huge on social media mostly got it because his friends peer pressured him into it. Has facebook and always says happy birthday to people on it but gets annoyed by all the politics. His instagram is samnotsowise alternatively gardeningamgee. Its super wholesome, lots of pictures of his plants and pets and him and Frodo. Sometimes he’ll post a poem

Frodo

Frodo would be on tumblr tho. Username is bagginit on insta and frodoninefingers on twitter which he never uses. His tumblr is ringringhello. He also has insta but rarely posts anything except occasionally a picture of Sam. He has a linguistics Youtube channel where he talks about elvish history and language. Actually the most political on social media this is because Frodo has a very strong moral compass and wants to get the word out about important issues.

Boromir

He’s a twitch streamer I’m sorry. He also has twitter at hornofgondor. Likes everyone of Merry and Pippin’s videos and posts and reposts them with captions like “love these guys!!!” Mostly shares memes on twitter and facebook very much dad vibes

Gandalf

Posts weird shit that no one understands on facebook and instagram at thegreywizard

Bilbo

He has facebook and likes to tag his relatives in things that he knows will annoy them. Other than that he just posts memories of Frodo like the proud parent he is Like every birthday he’ll post something really sweet and sappy like “so proud of the young man he’s become”

Elrond

He gets in trouble on twitter sometimes but not nearly as much as Thranduil

Faramir

Insta and tiktok at stewardstew. Mostly posts pics of his cats. Reposts everything Eowyn posts. Likes to uplift his friends. Answers citizen questions on official gondor accounts very warmly. Also shares memes

Eowyn

She has a podcast and everyone has been a guest at some point. She highlights inequalities in middle earth. Lots of reposts of feminist events and programs. Badass pics of her with her sword on her insta and tiktok. She does lots of tiktok challenges. Her username is iamnoman on tiktok and eowinner on instagram

Arwen

Like legolas is all over insta posts lots of glammy photos in the woods as well. But she also shares a lot of Eowyn’s posts. Posts lots of inspirational quotes and stuff. Is really into yoga and posts about that as well. Her name on all social medias is evenstarwen

[physalian]

Evil MacGuffins (Or an excuse to gush about Lord of the Rings)

It’s kind of crazy how so much of Tolkien’s worldbuilding has defined fantasy. The default for Elves and Dwarves, fantasy kingdoms, character archetypes, themes, and motifs come from Tolkien’s works.

But you know what’s rarely ever redone in modern fantasy? The One Ring. Probably because works piggybacking off the success of their predecessors rarely understand the themes of what made the original so legendary *cough* teen dystopia *cough*.

So—the One Ring.

Addressing the infamous Eagles “plot hole” once again for any stragglers who still think *gotcha* for this masterpiece: 1) The Eagles were busy. 2) The Eagles are not subtle at all and this mission required absolute stealth, because the one place the One Ring can be destroyed is in Sauron’s house, thus the closer they get to destroying it, the closer Sauron gets to just reaching out and taking it. 3) There were 9 Nazgul and Fellbeasts in the way. 4) The Eagles are basically gods, second only to the actual gods of the world. This makes them deeply inadvisable to go anywhere near the One Ring.

Why? Yes the Ring gives you some random powers like invisibility and slower aging but its purpose is temptation and political power. As you can see in the movie’s prologue, all the Rings of Power were subservient to Sauron’s master ring, the One Ring, to bend to his will… to varying degrees of success.

The power of the One Ring is proportional to the power of its wielder, giving you social and political influence over all your followers. So if you’re, say, a king of men, and you become Sauron’s minion, you’re going to lead your kingdom to ruin doing his bidding whether you realize you’re doing it or not. If you have no political or social power, like, say a hobbit? The Ring doesn’t have much use for you and you, seeing no benefit to world domination, are more resistant to its beguiling.

All this to say: The story makes it very clear that Frodo has to be the ring-bearer because he’s impervious to the Ring’s wiles. Anyone more competent, like Aragorn or Legolas, or Gandalf, are more susceptible to its power. The more power you have, the more destruction you will wreak under the Ring’s influence, and everyone bends to the Ring’s will eventually, no matter how good your intentions.

Eagles are great. Evil Eagles would be very, very bad.

Gandalf is great. Evil Gandalf looks like Saruman, and we all saw how that went.

That is a built-in plot armor I never see in modern fiction—Why?

—

One of the many messages of LOTR is not “good always triumphs” but instead “evil always loses”. The difference being here that it’s not necessarily the Power of Friendship that defeats evil, it’s evil’s selfish and self-sabotaging nature that eats itself to its own demise.

Example: Neither Frodo nor Sam strike the killing blow on Gollum. Gollum falls fighting Frodo for the Ring and can't let go of it to save himself. The Power of Friendship saves Frodo, but it doesn't destroy the Ring.

The One Ring is a MacGuffin like no other in that it’s not just a cool inanimate and useless object that only holds meaning to the characters that want it—the Ring is its own character enticing all these people to lust after it and fall on their own swords doing so.

Obviously, if you find the enemy’s magic weapon in your possession, you’re going to want to use it against them, which is exactly Boromir’s argument. Any other story and you’d have a difficult time justifying why your characters wouldn’t seize this golden opportunity. In this story, by the weapon’s very nature, trying to use it is exactly what it, and its creator, wants.

The point of the Ring, and at least my interpretation of its meaning, is this: When you’re going up against the evil and corrupt, you cannot let yourself become corrupted trying to defeat it, or else the cycle will never be broken. Or, “Hate can­not dri­ve out hate; only love can do that.”

I almost wish we had seen it seriously tempt the more powerful characters—like seeing Aragorn forced to use it in an emergency the way Frodo does several times. See what it does to him and how hard it is to resist this beguiling weapon’s siren song.

“Evil weapon is super conveniently powerful and would solve all our problems but alas, it has some nasty side effects” has been done before, frequently in anime. Usually, though, that weapon isn’t the centerpiece of the story. It’s the edgy side-character’s Hail Mary when things have gone Very Wrong.

—

Most LOTR copycats focus on the cool species and the magical lands and the magic systems and a generically evil villain who wants world domination. Yes, Sauron is, by modern standards, pretty one-note. He wants to rule the world. Why? Because he’s Evil and Prideful. There’s nothing wrong with a pure-evil villain, they can be highly entertaining without angst dragging them down.

However, Pure Evil villains work best when either they’re incredibly charismatic, like Disney Renaissance villains, or they’re just the face of the metaphor. Ozai from ATLA does not need character development, Netflix. He may be the face of the Fire Nation, but it’s his regime and this one element’s unbalanced crusade for world domination that’s the “villain”.

Sauron isn’t even a giant, corporeal eye in the book. He’s just this disembodied entity represented by the eye in visions. His influence and how it motivates legions of orcs, humans, and anyone else tempted by power, is the “villain”.

The One Ring serves as his thematic proxy. It’s not just a magic ring, it’s a cosmic mousetrap waiting to spring on anyone proud enough to think they can overcome it.

And I just never see that in modern fantasy.

—

TLDR; There is no MacGuffin quite like the One Ring and no, the Eagles aren’t a lazy or forgotten deus ex machina. When you’re coming up with your heroes and villains in fantasy and sci-fi, consider something like the Ring as this double-edged sword that has everyone gunning for it either unknowing that it’s exactly what the villain wants, or too proud to think they can fall victim to it.

[realunderlake]

Fantasy Ideology Part 1: Magic

I don't know if this is anything, but sometimes I like to think about the ideological and social impacts about elements of fantasy worldbuilding.

Like, take magic for example. There are generally different ways it's presented in fantasy fiction. Sometimes, it requires an innate aspect of being to use (a la the force in Star Wars, or however the heck harry potter magic works.) Sometimes this innate aspect is heritable, and sometimes it is completely random. Other times, magic is something that requires rigorous study. And yet, we seem to have one broad conception of magic in most fantasy media: Wizards sitting off in their tower, doing spells and stuff. Most settings don't think about how magic would impact the world that much, and instead make the world a bland, medieval Europe pastiche.

But lets look at magic from a social perspective, taking the classic DnD approach of "A wizard can be taught magic, though it generally takes a long time, and they should start from adolescence." You know what Magic is then comparable to? Because it's not a university professor... It's a Knight. For much of human history, aristocrats were warriors, because learning to be a *good* warrior, who used the most high tech stuff (whether that be chariots, or the couched lance) took a lot of effort, and you had to start pretty young, similar to how magic works. Thus, the social consequences of magic should be obvious, magic should be something that is used by the upper classes of a society, as they are the ones that are able to invest the time and energy into mastering it.

Perhaps however, as technology advances, magic becomes more widespread. Rather than having to painstakingly craft your own equipment, you can get it mass produced. Rather than working on outdated theories of physics (Aristotelian perhaps) you can observe the effects and costs of magic in a much more scientific way, increasing the effectiveness, and perhaps lowering the barrier to entry. Magic would be less blacksmithing, and more welding.

But in an instance like that, the ruling classes would not simply give up this power that they have, unless they have a reason to do so. Perhaps a king supports an up and coming magical bourgeoise to counteract the power of the magic-wielding noble class, for example. A good example of this is in the webnovel Mother of Learning, where the social forces have driven magic to be more equally available, after a devastation of the magic using ruling class through a combination of calamitous war, and the magical equivalent of the black death. In this gap of experienced mages, most of the polities have begun to allow "middle class" non-mage families into magical academies to bolster their ability to fight in the next continent-spanning conflict. This in turn has led to a backlash by the magic-wielding aristocracy, who have engaged in power struggles with the central government of the kingdom in which the story takes place, with many of these "Nouveau Riche" mages taking the side of the monarchy which has formed an unsteady alliance with these more progressive voices.

In any setting that puts some thought into how magic works in it's society, magic should be, by necessity, controlled by the ruling class. Whether that be because the ruling class are the only ones with the means to produce mages due to the required investment, or because those with the power to warp reality itself have decided that they, quite reasonably, want to be in charge.

Most wizards are written as weirdos off in towers because of Lord of the Rings, and because of cultural assumptions from Europe. But crucially, Europe never actually had wizards, and Gandalf was an angel, not a mortal man.

Even in settings where magic is not something trained, but instead something innate, there would be some method by which mages interact with society on a systemized level. Having them be simply random hermits makes no sense. Ars Magica, the TTRPG, for example, has a situation where most mages have a magical "gift", but said gift also makes it impossible for them to be liked or trusted by normal people. Despite this handicap, the Order of Hermes in that setting controls a good amount of political clout, with powerful Covenants being able to ignore the rulings of kings, and the Tribunal of Transylvannia basically co-ruling much of the Kingdom of Hungary with it's actual king.

These interactions of magic with class dynamics has interesting implications for the developments of ideologies. Will access to magical education be seen as a proletarian struggle in the development of socialism? Will Aristocracy persist for longer periods due to the inherent bias of the elites literally having magic? Can liberalism exist in a society where some people can warp reality with a snap of their fingers? Will it do *even better*, due to the radical individualist message meshing with the individual power held by magic?

Interesting Questions.

[borom1r]

WEIRD fuckin ask but we talked about it once and it would not exit the brain. Flavours of neurodivergence within the fellowship: discuss?

OGH. no, good ask. good ask I love it. AUTISM FLAVORED bc that is my own experience :3

Aragorn— autism of the “I Am 100% A Changeling, I Have No Idea How To Relate To Humanity” variety. like yea being partly raised by elves didn’t help but he absolutely wandered around mimicking people to learn how to Behave Like A Person. autism trait absorption for the win!! comes to Minas Tirith and gets a painful crash course in masking, but never quite figured out how to Not stare at someone like a feral cat when he wants something from them (despite the Stare, HATES eye contact)

Boromir— OPPOSITE AUTISM. very direct. EXTREMELY rigid routines. military history special interest (literally just undiagnosed dad autism). probably has food sensitivities but he’s spent so long as a soldier he can just eat anything now. he hates it and he won’t eat a big portion of non-safe foods, but at least he can swallow them. he IS absolutely 100% undiagnosed and doesn’t think there’s anything wrong but if he doesn’t get to perfectly make his bed every morning he will be in a Noticeably Bad Mood for the rest of the day < does not understand that this isn’t normal

Gandalf— oh there’s definitely something going on there, but good luck with figuring THAT out

Legolas— AuDHD king. the autism/ADHD comorbidity is real and he barely bothers to mask. least of all in front of men?? he’s an elf prince and you expect him to act “normal” by human standards? I love how jacked up the Hobbit film timeline is bc Thranduil implying to Legolas “yeah go hang out in Rivendell with a ten year old” is SO funny. canon to me tho. there was a very significant chunk of time where Aragorn was just Mini Legolas. hell world for civilized Rivendell elves. unlike Aragorn, however, prefers very direct eye contact. WILL fully hit you with the 👁️👁️ almost unblinking for a whole conversation

Gimli— I’m gonna be real here. I think neurotypical but in the sense of like. literally nobody cares. dwarves are craftsmen, artisans, smiths, you think they’re going to risk squandering talent simply because somebody needs some accommodations? are you nuts???? like yea maybe somebody’s a Little Weird Sometimes but they can work the forge just fine or tool leather for straps/handle wraps, or draft designs, or stamp metal for decorations, like?? doesn’t particularly grasp the need for labels when you can just work with ppl to figure out what’s best for them + then everyone’s happy. fully has to stew on the fact that Men Don’t Do That, men are actually very rigid about what is socially acceptable and won’t provide accommodations Unless there is a label. wild.

Frodo— autism/depression hell combination. no meltdowns, only shutdowns. auditory processing disorder!! definitely also has poor temperature regulation (CONSTANTLY cold). hey did u know that’s a symptom of ASD? crazy. WILD. anyways. Sam knows he can barely handle the feeling of mittens/gloves so half the time when they’re hanging out is Sam just holding Frodo’s hands so they actually fucking warm up for a bit. not too rigid about Big routines, most of his are Little (always putting a specific amount of sugar in his tea, for example)

Sam— neurotypical but in the sense of my dad where he was just SO used to me being Autistically Strange that he was just like. “well, that’s Strider!” < blissfully unaware. fully just SO used to whatever’s going on w/ Frodo+Merry that it’s Normal to him. like wdym they’re different?? those are just his friends?? hello??

Merry— ADHDDDDDDDDD. and look ik Tolkien said pipeweed is just tobacco but that’s a lie and we all know it, right? right. self-medicating with pipeweed.

Pippin— neurotypical but Pippin-flavored

[brunofneves]

Coolest polytheist gods and goddesses:

1- Pele

As if being a goddess of volcanoes wasn't enough, she's always getting into trouble! She1ll pick a fights with anyone, especially the ice and snow goddesses with whom she has a rivalry. She is the creator of the Hawaii Islands.

2- Dyonisus

Not only is he the god of wine and drinking, but he also breaks inhibitions and social rules. Previously a foreign deity, he was venerated especially by the Orpimides but became so popular that he became one of the gods of Olympus.

3- Osiris

A god of vegetation and harvest, he was cut into pieces by his brother Set. His wife Isis gathered his parts and turned him into a mummy with the help of Anubis. Just like the crops, he returned to life, like a mummy-zombie god who rules the world of the dead.

4- Sihai Longwang(Four Dragon Kings of the Sea)

Not only are they dragons, not only are they sea dragon gods who can take human form and control storms, but they also live in palaces beneath the ocean and where they are served by talking sea animals!

5- Odin

A wizard god, he inspired all the famous old wizards like Merlin and Gandalf. What makes him so iconic is his obsession with knowledge, willing to sacrifice his eye and be tortured for days in exchange for magical powers, spells, potions(such as the ale of poetry), the berzerkers, etc.

[autolenaphilia]

Thoughts on Tolkien

I have a complex relationship to the works of J.R.R. Tolkien. Like many readers, The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings was my introduction to fantasy, and it enabled me to see right through the many inferior imitators of LOTR and recognize them as such. And I greatly admired Tolkien. As I grew older, I became more aware of other fantasy authors, both those who pre-dated Tolkien’s works and those who came after. And I also became aware of the history of fantasy fiction (which did not start with Tolkien) and the criticism of Tolkien, made by authors like Michael Moorock and China Mieville.

My thoughts on Tolkien and his place within the fantasy genre now are so ambiguous and complex that I feel the need to write this long post, which is admittedly not very coherent and rambling, but I have so much to say that it feels like it can’t be neatly ordered. More under the cut.

Part 1: Tolkien’s themes and his value as an author

One of the major criticisms of Tolkien is Michael Moorcock’s essay Epic Pooh. And It’s flawed, his criticism of Tolkien is overstated and he clearly misreads LOTR (missing out on the novel’s tragic aspects), Mieville’s essay is more even-handed and better. Yet the charge both Moorcock and Mieville make, of Tolkien’s works being reactionary, is undoubtedly true. Tolkien was a catholic conservative and it clearly shows in his works.

It’s the kind of truly reactionary politics that was against industrial capitalism and longed for a romanticized medieval world prior to both the French revolution and the Industrial revolution. It was the original kind of political conservatism, a reaction to the French revolution, and representing the interest of the old aristocracy, in opposition to the rising capitalist class. But the reactionaries soon found that it was impossible to return to a pre-1789 world. The failure of the Bourbon restoration to reverse the revolution, despite the considerable influence of the reactionary ultra-royalists is a case in point. Conservative politicians instead realized during the 18th century that the only viable conservative project was conserving capitalism from the threat of the rising socialist movement.

Instead this reactionary thinking found its most lasting expression in literature. The romantic movement was in many ways a reaction to industrial capitalism. The romantics noticed how nature was destroyed to make way for ugly industry. And they started to literally romanticize the pre-industrial medieval period in their works in response. It was a kind of emotional response to the uglyness of capitalism and its destruction of nature. It wasn’t entirely right-wing in nature, William Morris is a good example, but it was easily compatible with the reactionary politics.

Tolkien is essentially a neo-romantic writer who continues that tradition. Middle-Earth is an invented world that idealizes the medieval world, including its social systems. In Middle-Earth monarchy works and both The Hobbit and LOTR has a return of the rightful king subplot. And it’s a very pastoral and anti-industrial fantasy. Both Sauron and especially Saruman represent the industrial revolution and destroy the beauty of nature with their unnatural works.

Tolkien has been criticized for his essentialism and manichean morality. The charge of manicheanism is partly true. His worldbuilding has a very clear divide between good and evil, Eru Iluvatar is good, Morgoth is evil. It reveals Tolkien’s catholicism pretty well, they’re basically God and Satan.

However he also has another trait of catholicism: belief in the fall of man and original sin. People who are not God are easily corrupted, especially by power. That’s the point of the Ring. It promises the owner mastery of the world and you will turn evil if you give in to that temptation. Even Gandalf and Galadriel would be corrupted if given the Ring, and if they remain good and pure it’s only because they recognize that and don’t try to get hold of the Ring. Good people can still have power, Aragorn gaining power as king is good, but it’s far more limited than what the ring promises.

This is what gives Tolkien’s character’s complexity, it is that they are all fallible and in LOTR, particularly to being corrupted by power. The Silmarillion shows that even the elves are fully capable of several of the seven sins.

And Tolkien was aware you could not turn back the clock to any prelapsarian utopia. In fact, as a good catholic he believed life on Earth was inevitably flawed, the “vale of tears” and was in decline. Salvation could only come from God and the afterlife. Thus Middle-Earth, while having aspects of a pastoral and magical utopia, is a land in a decline from that ideal. LOTR is about how magic and elves are leaving Middle-Earth, making way for the age of man. In fact, Middle-Earth is not a world separate from our world, but an imagined past for it. The war of the ring is necessary to prevent a great catastrophe, ut it can’t prevent the inevitable decline. if Sauron and Saruman represent the industrial revolution and are defeated, it will still happen eventually.

Tolkien had an ambivalence about violence and war. He is sometimes criticized for glorifying violence, and again there is some truth to the accusation, yet the truth is more nuanced. War is justified in Lord of the Rings, the enemies are the evil orcs and killing them holds back Sauron from wreaking utter catastrophe with his rule of Middle-Earth. Yet there is still a sense of the horror of war, informed by Tolkien’s own experiences in World War I. Faramir’s short speech about not loving the bright sword or the glory of the warrior, but “only that which they defend” about sums it up. There are moving depictions of the dead bodies left behind after a battle, while that battle is still justified in the text.

There is similarly an emphasis on the concept of Christian pity and mercy. Gollum is malevolent to both of them, but both Bilbo in The Hobbit and Frodo in The Lord of the Rings take pity on Gollum and spare him. Gandalf makes it explicitthat the message is that you should show mercy and not kill everyone you think deserve death, and that unexpected good will come out of it. When Gollum’s actions at the end of LOTR lead to the destruction of the Ring, through an act of God, he is proven completely right.

Tolkien’s view on women similarly deserves some nuance in discussion. There is little outright misogyny, but there is a lack of female characters. There are none in The Hobbit. And women are present in LOTR and The Silmarillion, but play a minor part compared to the male characters. Still, Tolkien’s women do have power. Eowyn is probably the most interesting, as she gets to perform the roles otherwise reserved for male characters. She fight in war as a “shieldmaiden” (a term from Norse myth) and defeats the Witch-king of Angmar. Even her gender is relevant in this struggle, as the witch-king proclaims that no man may stop him, but Eowyn is still able to defeat him because she is woman. She later abandons war as a shieldmaiden and becomes a healer. It’s something that might sound bad out of context, but in the context of the portrayal of war reflects Tolkien’s awareness of the horrors of war, rather than his sexism. It’s not that she is unfit for battle because of her gender, instead Eowyn has become wise about the horrors of war after experiencing it and wishes not to glorify it any longer.

The charge of racism and essentialism has more weight to it. The essentialism part is undoubtedly true, every race such as elves, dwarves and hobbits has a determined character due to their race, including psychological traits. His orcs are an inherently evil race, despite clearly being sentient. They are the main means of justifying the warfare of the heroes, as their evil nature means they are not able to be pitied.

This troubled even Tolkien late in life, who as a catholic, of course believed in free will and that doing good or evil was a choice. So if the orcs are sentient, and thus have free will, yet are all evil due to their race, there is an obvious contradiction there. This was private worldbuilding thoughts that isn’t really expressed in the finished works by him that we have, yet they do illustrate how problematic the orcs are as a concept, even from his catholic conservative perspective.

The orcs are racist, even if they were not intended to be a caricature of non-white people as evil. Tolkien grew up and lived during the height of the British Empire, and it’s inevitable that he absorbed much of its ideology. So inventing an inherently evil and barbaric dark-skinned race is not an innocent choice, however unintentional it is.

Yet you don’t have to look to the orcs to see signs of racism in Tolkien. The Haradrim, who are dark-skinned men from the south who serve Sauron, are enough. Unlike orcs they are not inherently evil and are given some sympathy, but they still are uncomfortably racist.

So that’s what Tolkien’s works are about, their themes. How are Tolkien’s books as reading? And I think they’re good. The Hobbit is a fine children’s adventure novel, even if it’s very boy’s own adventure (as in boy’s only adventure). The Lord of the Rings is a fine epic adventure novel, if overlong as the kind of victorian adventure novel Tolkien was inspired by tended to be. The pacing is often slow as the book is overburdened a bit with worldbuilding and scene descriptions, but it’s not too bad.

The Silmarillion had to heavy edited and actually partly written by Christopher Tolkien after John Ronald Reuel’s death, but it maybe expresses J.R.R. Tolkien’s goal of creating a fictional mythology best. There are fewer concessions to the modern form of the novel, the storytelling is more mythical and epic. It feels appropriate for Tolkien’s goals and works rather well.

They are maybe not literary masterpieces in terms of character complexity or the beauty of the prose, they are readable, enjoyable and emotionally complex enough to be often moving. Tolkien’s catholicism and conservatism is always apparent, and I don’t agree with it, but it’s expressed with imagination and consistency.

Of course Tolkien was very much a worldbuilder, in the sense of creating a consistent secondary fantasy world with its own history and languages. It’s probably his most original trait, writers had created secondary worlds before him, both dreamlike ones like Oz or more grounded worlds like those of William Morris, but they were not as elaborate as Tolkien’s Middle-Earth.

Tolkien’s world has been much imitated, but these imitations are seldom as convincing. Tolkien was a philologist with a truly impressive knowledge of language and mythology. His languages are actual constructed languages, with grammar and a vocabulary. They are not fully usable, but there is enough substance for them to be convincing and it lends a strong verisimilitude to his worlds. Their names actually mean things, and are connected to the languages in interesting ways.

Part 2: Adaptations

When it comes to adaptations. I have to agree with the general consensus that the Peter Jackson movies of LOTR are fine, while the Hobbit movies by the same director are pretty bad. The Hobbit movies are overburdened with unnecessary changes and additions in a vain attempt to make it into a three movie epic to rival LOTR, not recognizing it’s a simple children’s adventure novel. Even Jackson’s LOTR movies are a bit glib in how they handle violence and war, there is too much Hollywood-style action to make war seem cool.

The 1977 The Hobbit film by Rankin-Bassis perhaps too short, as it tries to squeeze the story into a 90 minute film. But visually it has some interesting designs, including good background art. The film’s modesty and earnest attempt to be a story for children is charming and refreshing after experiencing the Jackson films.

The best adaptation in my opinion is the 1981 BBC radio drama, which is just excellent. The quality of the acting is of the highest quality, featuring many of the greatest British actors of the time, including Ian Holm as Frodo, Bill Nighy as Sam, Robert Stephens as Aragorn and Michael Hordern as Gandalf. Stephens as Aragorn and Peter Woodthorpe as Gollum are the definitive portrayals in my mind. The dramatization is a skillful adaptation that despite some necessary abridgements stays remarkably true to the book. It even includes many of the poems and songs.

Part 3: The history of fantasy

Of course Tolkien is overrated in the sense that he is often viewed as the creator of fantasy. Even some of his critics tend to see him as some originator of the fantasy genre and condemn the genre accordingly. And that is just not true. Fantasy fiction, in the sense of modern fiction that uses supernatural elements inspired by myth and fairy tales and folklore, dates to the romantic movement.

The stories of E.T.A. Hoffmann and Friedrich De La Motte Foque’s Undine are early 19th century German examples. The gothic and supernatural horror in general has strong overlap with fantasy, and William Beckford’s Vathek is a classic gothic novel with elements of what we now call fantasy fiction. There is also non-supernatural fiction that influenced fantasy. There is noting explicitly supernatural about Walter Scott’s Ivanhoe but it’s tale of adventure in a romanticized middle-ages has much to do with Tolkien and much of fantasy fiction.

During the Victorian era this tradition was continued by writers such as George Macdonald with novels like Phantastesand later in the century by William Morris. Morris preceded Tolkien by portraying a grounded medievalistic secondary world instead of the dreamlands a lot of other fantasy time tended to portray. He also wrote better and more varied women characters than Tolkien. By the Edwardian era, the major fantasy writer in English was Lord Dunsany. In fact there is not much in Tolkien that you can’t trace back to Morris and Dunsany.

And of course there is a wealth of children’s fiction preceding Tolkien’s The Hobbit, much of which is still well-known today. Lewis Carroll’s Alice in Wonderland, J.M. Barrie’s Peter Pan, and L. Frank Baum’s Oz books are still popular.

Tolkien was not even the only one continuing the tradition romantic and Victorian era fantasy in his time. Dunsany was broadly his contemporary, and you have other writers like T.H. White with The Once and Future King, E.R. Eddison and Hope Mirrlees. And during Tolkien’s era, fantasy flourished in pulp fiction. Robert E. Howard is the most famous, but Lovecraft wrote some fine Dunsany-inspired fantasy with his Dreamlands tales. And there are other lesser know fantasy pulp writers like Clark Ashton Smith, A. Merritt and Fletcher Pratt and L. Sprague De Camp.

If I resent Tolkien’s popularity, it’s because the sheer extent of it has overshadowed the wealth and diversity of fantasy that preceded him. This is why I felt the need to write this abridged history of fantasy fiction in what is ostensibly a Tolkien review, he should be put into context far more often than he is.

He merely popularized the genre. It was no accident that he did. Writers like Morris, Eddison and Dunsany were consciously archaic in their prose. Tolkien has some archaicisms, but his language is far simpler and more modern. The fantasy writers who inspired Tolkien may have written better prose than Tolkien, but it was much less accessible and harder to imitate.

Part 4: Tolkien’s influence on fantasy

Of course Tolkien proved hard to imitate too. The modern fantasy genre is in large part built upon an imitation of Tolkien, and those novels are usually the least interesting ones. There is a lot of what Ursula Le Guin called commodified fantasy that imitates Tolkien.

It started with Terry Brooks’s The Sword of Shannara, a book that copied the plot and characters of LOTR so deeply that writer and editor Lin Carter aptly called it "the single most cold-blooded, complete rip-off of another book that I have ever read”. But Shannara was a great sales success, one which proved that you could shamelessly imitate LOTR and become a bestseller. This led publishers to publish a lot of heavily Tolkien-inspired commercial fantasy.

These imitations simplified Tolkien, often developing his faults as a writer to extreme degrees without any of his virtues. The idealization of monarchy, the essentialistic portrayal of the races like elves and dwarves, the lack of leading women characters, all were copied without thought into this imitation-Tolkien genre. If Tolkien’s romanticization of a pre-industrial past was part of a consistent reactionary Catholic worldview, the books of his imitators do it mainly just because Tolkien did it and Tolkien sold a lot of books.

LOTR could be rightfully accused of being overlong, but it’s nothing compared to how his imitators write. The general idea seems to be that since LOTR is a long book (which depending on edition) is over one thousand-pages long and it’s good, what if we write a long series of books that are all about 1000 pages, that must be even better, right?

Tolkien’s worldbuilding was always an escapist endeavour, but modern fantasy writing seems to be entirely motivated to provide easy escapism into a secondary fictional world. The quality of the storytelling or writing doesn’t seem to matter, commercial fantasy books just seem to exist to provide a secondary world to escape into from the troubles of the real one. It doesn’t matter that the plot barely advances from long book to long book, as long as the reader gets to stay in this comforting world. And these imitation-Tolkien worlds are far inferior to his, since they lack the linguistic and mythological knowledge that Tolkien had. Their names and words are often just random letters strung together, instead of the carefully constructed languages Tolkien made.

Of course in the last 20 years or so, the most direct form of Tolkien-imitators in fantasy have mostly died out, except in YA and children’s fiction, where it still thrives. Harry Potter still relies on the plot of defeating a dark lord taken from Tolkien. In fantasy marketed to “adults” it has been replaced by a George R.R. Martin inspired grimdark genre of fantasy which isn’t much of an improvement. The books still further straight white male perspective of Tolkien and his imitators, and are still derivative of his medieval-flavored world. They just have a lot more pointless violence, sometimes sexual against women.

The naked commercialism of such commodified fantasy fiction is also contrary to how Tolkien wrote. Tolkien’s novels, especially LOTR, have been massive sales successes, but he could not have predicted that in the least. Bestsellers in the 1940s and 50s were not remotely like LOTR, and while part of an existing fantasy genre, it was not a massively commercially successful one. It was clearly a labour of love for Tolkien, made for its own sake, rather than any hope of money.

So I definitely think the exalted position of LOTR in western culture is not a good thing. It’s massive success has overshadowed the wealth and diversity of fantasy fiction, both works previous and contemporary to Tolkien and in the present day by becoming the model for commodified fantasy to this day. And Tolkien work has reactionary themes that is often perpetuated by the works imitating it. You can’t really think about LOTR and Tolkien today without acknowledging that.

Yet Tolkien’s fiction is hard for me to completely condemn. They are despite their flaws entertaining and interesting fiction. And Tolkien clearly did not intend for them to become the commercial behemoths they became. He is not to blame for the effect his work had on others.

[spilledreality]

The Stormcrow Fallacy

Hey Adam,

Sent a reply via Substack's automated email system. Re-trying through your proper email address (and doxxing my real name via academic email!) just in case the last attempt didn't get through. If you're just too busy to respond, no hard feelings, and I promise not to keep following up.

I've been discussing with friends lately what we've called the Stormcrow fallacy. In Tolkien—an author who, as a young literature student, I thumbed my nose at, but have lately come around to considering one of the great literary modernists & WWI novelists—Gandalf, because he consistently shows up in advance of, and brings news of, misfortune, is often mis-identified as bringing that misfortune with him. (This identification leads to his nickname of Stormcrow.) I'm loath to call things fallacies, as behavioral economics persistently misuses that term when labeling (what in my view are simply) heuristics. But this does seem to be a basic logical error of confusing correlation with causation—one which leads to e.g. a lot of suppression in bureaucracies of coming trouble. (See also Feynman on the Challenger disaster.) There are a ton of similar failure modes, right, that boil down to mistaken causal attribution? "Cargocult" being a favorite example of geeks worldwide.

Anyway, I particularly liked your informal description of consciousness as a Stormcrow, as the intern who only shows up when something breaks. Everything I've been learning about cognitive science & phenomenology the past few years seems to point in this direction. (Heidegger's ready-to-hand vs present-at-hand concept is one of the more concise illustrations, but see also William James on habit, or ideas in predictive processing about what sorts of errors might propagate to the highest level of the stack.) And, like Stormcrow, like Gandalf, what this consciousness appears to do is manage the hard problem of triage, of prioritization. Which is also, not coincidentally I think, a problem associated with wisdom. Wisdom and consciousness both, as I understand them, are means of adjudicating various priorities which demand resources (including but not limited to attention), across a body, a family, or a geopolitical unit. Hence the historical premium on wise father, wise king, etc as an adjudicator of a social ecology who maintains and restores equilibria. (Hence the association of wisdom with "perspective"—a temporally or spatially or interpersonally zoomed-out view.) This wisdom often operates through a "feel for the game" which cannot be verbally justified. (Not surprising given this is how humans solve many of their complex, high-uncertainty problems.) But its implicit function mimics the search for Pareto optimality, which is why it is so frequently characterized by ideas like moderation, balance, and tao-like navigations of Scylla and Charybdis for a sweet spot ("Goldilocks zone").

Yours with much appreciation and interest,

S.R.

[melhekhelmurkun]

Me omw to find a therapist for each character in LOTR

[xanthusasaka]

A lil fanfic to go with this modern AU art:

（fake history /politics incoming :D )

“Among the work of this little-known reporter, the most controversial one is this photo taken on the corner of 57th Street in Manhattan... The King of Erebor, exiled in Algiers, visited the United Nations Headquarters that autumn. It was at the UN Generally Assembly where he delivered his famous speech, calling on the members of the General Assembly to declare the Prohibition on the Use of Chemical Weapons in Aesgalos and Erebor. Many believed that this was the footstone towards the following ceasefire agreement in Erebor - merely three months later, the UN peacekeeping force entered the region, and the special commissioner of UN Secretary-General temporarily took over the administration of the Lonely Mountain until the reconstruction of local government was completed. Thorin II, who used to claim himself king of Erebor, accepted this arrangement, relinquishing his power, and ended his excite with a returned to live in Erebor, continuing to influence its people as a descendant of the royal family.

His efforts for peace building have been highly praised by the international community. He have visited the United Nations Headquarters many times since then, as a distinguished individual from the cultural field. However, this photos taken by a tabloid reporters have left certain interesting yet absurd speculation on Thorin II's first visit to New York. As an invitee of Secretary-General Gandalf and the General Assembly, he attended sessions of the First Committee and closed-door discussions of the Security Council; but after his trip to UN headquarters, he left with Ambassador Baggins, Special Representative of the Secretary-General for Erebor, instead of being surrounded by his own man like other politicians, the reporter who took the photo insists that he saw the secretary's missionary "talking with the exiled king in an extreme intimate way, and kissed him on the cheek" through the half-rolled down window of the black Link Limousine. He went on to point out that Excellency Baggins, a British scholar from Georgetown University, who had never served in the British diplomatic system and was directly trusted by the Secretary-General to be a messenger of peace between countries and social groups in Erebor, which is unnatural and "with ulterior secrecy".

However, whatever reasons made Ambassador Baggins the ultimate choice for Secretary-General to solve the Erebor issue, Secretary Gandalf was not wrong in this appiontment. The talks he enabled over the past five years was constructive. Although he is not as well known in public as Thorin II or Gandalf, he is hailed by researchers as the real pusher behind the Ceasefire Agreement.

In both cases, the tabloid that the reporter works for has always lacked authenticity. Although the photo has received widespread attention, the article he wrote has not caused much discussion.

In retrospect, at that time, public opinion was very optimistic about Erebor’s future being peaceful and stable. Thus, no matter what personal relationship the diplomat had with the king in exile, wether this relationship has affected their decision-making, it seems unlikely a seal anecdote can cause too much controversy. The king himself has always maintained influence in Erebo, and his trust in the United Nations is good news for the outside world as long as it can help UN experts and peacekeepers enter the region after the end of Smaug's regime without further conflicts.

As for whether Thorin II, a distant relative of the Queen, has in fact had a close friendship with the British man, or, as the original news report that included this photo suggested, a relationship beyond friendship, there have been few reports since then and it remains a myth. As a descendant of a royal family in Europe, Thorin never married, which still arouses people's speculation and attention. On the other side, ambassador Baggins is very good at keeping his secrets and has never exposed any details of his love life to the public. Some people believe that after he left his position of a senior official in the UN system, he did not return to any university because he moved to Erebor to spend time with his lover- but this rumor lacks any evidence. To this day, the truth is still unknown ... A social group in Erebor tried to promote their young king as a homosexuality icon in a parade, to which the dark-haired, handsome, yet somewhat gloomy-looking ex-king gave a very vague answer when meeting with its members. Instead of denying or answering, he handed the microphone back to the interviewer and let her move on to the next question.

[dimdiamond]

Bagginshield fic list

Yeah, I decided to make one too because there are enough to cause me headaches and I'd like to have them somewhere organized. Please look at the tags before reading them!

Fix-it fics

Desperate magic by BeautifulFiction: Bilbo is left to tend Thorin as he hovers on the brink of death after the Battle of the Five Armies. Is love enough to save Erebor's king, or is this the last farewell?

Lay your troubles down by Avelera: An extended version of "the acorn scene." Bilbo sees his chance to snap Thorin out of his madness, and takes it.

The Riven Crown by BeautifulFiction: The aftermath of war is no laughing matter. Those who died must be honoured, those who are wounded must be healed, and those who remain need food and clothing, peace and sanctuary. With Thorin's life hanging in the balance, it is up to Bilbo and the rest of the Company to rule the rag-tag remnants of Erebor in his place. Then there is the matter of the gold... Can Bilbo save both king and kingdom, or is Erebor destined to fall deeper into ruin?

The Color of Possibility by lindoreda: When Bilbo puts himself between Thorin and Azog's blade, his mithril shirt protecting them both, it isn't long before some dwarves whisper that 'Oakenshield' might not be the best epithet for their king anymore. But for Bilbo, barred from Thorin's sight since the battle, this new epithet only adds to the sting. Spending his days caring for the recovering princes, Bilbo wonders how much more of this he can take, not suspecting his place at the center of a silent divide in the company.

Homesick by Margo_Kim: Five years after they've reclaimed Erebor, Thorin is sick of home, Bilbo is just sick, and neither is handling the situation ideally.

The Road Delivered Us Home by keelywolfe: In the years since Bilbo left Erebor, he has lost his respectability, gained a nephew, and gotten on with life at Bag End. He'd left aside adventure for the comforts and peace of his little Hobbit hole, and for the love of a child who needed him. Though perhaps, adventures can yet find him.

Notices in the Paper by YamBits: Bilbo returns to the Shire after his adventure, newly married, and newly homeless, after his two year absence allowed the Sackville-Bagginses to obtain Bag End. Bilbo and Thorin go to the Tooks for help, and find newly orphaned Frodo Baggins, also looking for a home.

A Royal Guardianship by ladyoakenshields: When Bilbo and Thorin return to the Shire for a sabbatical during Yuletide, they find a reason to retire the throne in Erebor sooner than expected.

The Shire's gems by awkwarng3: Thorin, Bilbo, and Frodo move to the Shire after raising Frodo in Erebor, and Frodo makes a friend.

Time travel fix-it fics

An expected journey by MarieJacquelyn: For years Bilbo has written about his adventures and told stories about his dealings with dwarves and dragons. To most it seemed like fanciful nonsense but to Bilbo it was all very real. A weight followed him home from his travels, one called regret. Now in his final moments Bilbo has a choice to make – go quietly into death’s embrace or go back again and face all the fear and pain for the chance to make things right? Of course, change is a fickle thing and not everything can be done again as Bilbo is about to find out. In the end, it may not only be salvation that he’s fighting for.

Bilbo Baggins, warrior of the Valar by Pallalalo: Bilbo raised his eyebrows. “And you’ve come to the Shire to look for this someone? My, Gandalf, I wonder if you know Hobbits at all. They would tell you that adventures are nasty, disturbing, uncomfortable things. That they would make you late for dinner.” Bilbo recalled his own words perfectly. It had been something he and Gandalf had looked back on with bittersweet laughter. This Gandalf however noticed his exact words. “Would they now? And what about you, mhm? What would you tell me about adventures?” #The Valar send Bilbo back in time, to the day where Gandalf asks him to join in an adventure. After living a lifetime of regret and suffering, he vows to change things for the better. For Thorin. For Frodo. But will he succeed?

I'll die to care for you by thehufflepuffhobbit: His gaze landed on Mahal's eyes once more. "You did your best, Thorin." It was tempting to look away; he wanted to deny that with everything he had. It certainly didn't feel as though falling into Gold Sickness and then dying was doing his best. Mahal smirked, as though he knew Thorin's desire to contradict him, and pinched his cheek before walking over to a table. "Aye, I didn't think you would believe me. I'm not lying, it certainly could have gone better. More according to my plan, but I know you really did try." "Your plan?" He didn't know if he should ask, really. Knowing that his Maker had set a course for him, he didn't want to think about the ways he had done everything wrong. There were too many examples of mistakes in his long life, too many opportunities that he had missed that had probably been planned for him from the beginning. Or:Mahal feels like Thorin fucked up his legacy and gives him a do over.

Darker times ahead by Reach4theSky: Bilbo is sailing to the Undying Lands but wary of letting go of the guilt that has been with him for many decade. His most sincerest wish is to go back and change what was done. Before reaching the lands of peace and healing, he dies aboard the ship and finds that his wish is being granted, not because he is the one to wish it but because this is the dwarves last chance to escape a fate of eternal waiting. He finds that not only is he going to be sent back to his younger body, but so is the entire Company of Thorin Oakenshield. Time is a fickle thing and not all the members have their memories returned to them at the same time. The journey on becomes interesting as the dwarves slowly remember and fight for themselves and their kin, yet new hurdles are thrown at them when they realize that more people remember than expected...

Of an arcane binding by Salvia_G: An inexplicable magic ties Bilbo Baggins, hobbit of the Shire, to Thorin, dwarven prince of Erebor.

Legends by DomesticGoddess: The fellowship has set out on its noble quest to destroy the ring and put an end to the threat that is Sauron! Just set out really, barely left the gates of Imladris, but things are going smoothly enough so far. That is until the two most unlikely party crashers fall upon their little fellowship. Uncle Bilbo and the Legendary Thorin Oakenshield?! Frodo just wants to know what's going on but the two of them won't stop hollering at each other long enough for anyone to get a word in edgewise. Suddenly, their little group is joined by Frodo's two biggest heroes and he discovers there was a lot more to Uncle Bilbo's stories than he realized.

Beside myself by bliboboggins: "What are you doing? Just who do you think you are?" Startled, Bilbo turned around slowly. And there, in a familiar patchwork dressing gown, brandishing a fire poker wildly about, was... Bilbo.

Erebor never fell au fics

The hearth doesn't make the home by Moonrose91: For things Bilbo could not change, he was condemned to a life of isolation, with the belief that none could love him. And then a Dwarf came to Hobbiton.

Clarity of vision by Mithen: In a Middle-Earth where Erebor never fell, a shadow remains in the heart of the Lonely Mountain. Bilbo Baggins finds himself drawn reluctantly into a quest that will lead him across the continent--from Bree to Lake Evendim to the icy North and beyond--with a party of five dwarves searching for an artifact that will cure the ailing King Thrór.

Ghivashel by mdseiran: The last thing Bilbo expects when he stays up late one night is company. The strange dwarf and his companion crash into his life and prove unexpected saviours. But the dwarf seems to think he will be joining them on their travels, and Bilbo has no such intentions.

The Song of My Heart by DomesticGoddess: After a failed attempt of trying to carve out a new home in the Blue Mountains for his people, Thorin finds himself beseeching the Hobbit Thain and his council for a place for his people in their bountiful land. An agreement is struck and plans in the works for integrating his people into their land. The only condition being an arranged marriage between himself and one of their family heads. A small price to pay to see his people safe and well fed. Unfortunately, he’s to marry the most disagreeable hobbit in all the Shire who also seems to hold a personal grudge against him. If only he could figure out why his new betrothed hates him so much.

Oak and Mistletoe by HildyJ: After a life dominated by a strange form of sickness, Thorin is sent to the Shire to seek a cure only Bilbo Baggins can offer.

Karkûn shukula - A Cinderella AU by harrypanther: When the Prince of the Shire visits the Kingdom of Erebor, there is great excitement. There are hopes he will choose to marry one of the Royal Family, cementing an alliance that would secure food supplies for the dwarven Kingdom and gain new allies. All eligible dwarves are expected to attend a series of Balls. Unknown to the guests, there is a third royal child, manoeuvred out by his ambitious stepmother, for whom this may be his last chance of restoring his fortunes and escaping his fate…

Alone this Yuletide by Emsiecat: 'Alone this Yuletide? Irritated with prying and nosey family members? I am an out of work blacksmith currently trying to make my way by any means necessary that does not involve my resorting to thievery (prisons are most uncomfortable, I've unfortunate first hand experience). However, if you would like me to be your strictly platonic companion for any social function, but have me pretend that we are in a serious courtship, so as to torment your family and ward off unwanted suitors then I am more than obliging...' After becoming increasingly irritated by overtures of romance from various Shire residents following the death of his mother four years ago, Bilbo is more than ready to resort to desperate measures. That is, up to and including pretending to be in a serious relationship with a certain surly blacksmith currently inhabiting the Bindbale Woods. It's a good idea after all; all they have to do is pretend to be in love over the Yuletide period and Bilbo's family and suitors will surely leave him alone after that. It's perfect! And nothing can possibly go wrong, right? Certainly nothing as preposterous as falling for one another for real...

Modern au fics

Nothing gold can stay by perkynurples: Bilbo Baggins led a rather peaceful life, thank you very much, until an old acquaintance decided to turn it upside down, and he found himself agreeing to take a job that’s… let’s say not exactly up his alley, and might eventually cost him a little more than his treasured cozy lifestyle. Who would have thought tutoring a slightly menacing monarch’s more than slightly overbearing nephew could prove to be such an adventure?

Love-In-Idleness by perkynurples: Taking Bilbo Baggins, a successful movie actor who is only just getting used to the perks and intricacies of becoming A Face People Want To See, and putting him together with Thorin Oakenshield, with his very traditional (read: slightly backwards) ideas about what constitutes Real Art and Real Talent, might very well be viewed as just some clothead’s idea of a joke. But there are jokes, and then there are carefully calculated risks the size of controversial reproductions of classic Shakespearean plays - for Bilbo, it is the chance of a lifetime to prove himself to all those who have ever deemed him too one-dimensional to even attempt stage, while Thorin has the opportunity to get out of the rut that’s been hindering his career for so long now, and shine in a role worthy of his talent once again. That is if the two learn how to share the same space for more than ten minutes without wanting to tear each other’s hair out. The course of true love never did run smooth, after all…

Candid by northerntrash: Thorin wasn't entirely sure why there was a six-foot candid photograph of him hanging in this exhibition, but he was going to wring the neck of whoever had put it there. In which Bilbo is a photographer, Thorin an accidental model, and Gandalf just likes to make trouble for everyone.

How the west was won and where it got us by stickman: Bilbo is a harried 1st year British literature Ph.D. (early 20th century fiction) who happens to have an interest in spatial narrative structures, a lack of time-management skills, and a tiny apartment with a lot of books and very little furniture. He’s stressed, always, and doesn't quite know where he belongs. He tells himself that really, this is, in fact, what he wants to be doing. But sometimes, as much as he loves books, he gets an urge to do something with his hands. Thorin is a disgruntled M.Arch. 1 in his last year who can’t be arsed to shave and frightens his students, and, frankly, his profs, but his work is top-notch so no one can really say much. They can, however, bully him into running a hands-on design workshop on Saturday mornings, which is complete crap, because he’s used to drinking his Friday nights into oblivion so showing up at Milstein at 7:45 the next morning and trying to teach in a room of wall-to-wall windows as the sun rises is not at the top of his list. Besides, no one ever shows up. Except one morning, someone does. [graduate school AU]

Butterfly effect by eyra: Yoga wasn’t for him. Yoga was for interesting people. Luminous people; people who took gap years and spoke a foreign language. People who ate lentils and burned incense and had fantastic, colourful friends with fantastic, colourful lives full of travel and silent retreats and those baggy trousers with elephants on them. Yoga was decidedly not for people like Bilbo, who wore cardigans and ate beans on toast and whose linguistic capabilities stretched only as far as a rusty Spanish A-Level. Just your regular story of boy meets yoga instructor.

Remover of the obstacles by MistakenMagic: "Dis often chided her older brother for being a misanthropist. She did it so often it had become a term of endearment. It was true that Thorin struggled with people; he struggled to form and maintain relationships. Dr. Grey had diagnosed him with this and Thorin hadn’t the heart to tell him this wasn’t a symptom of his PTSD, it was a symptom of his personality. He exercised a sense of apathy with almost everyone he met… But Bilbo was different. Thorin actually found himself wanting to know more about him."

Color outside the lines by andquitefrankly: Kindergarten has just gotten significantly better. Just ask Thorin, who's got the biggest crush on the new kid in class, Bilbo Baggins. With the help of his friends, Thorin knows that he can take back the swings from the 1st graders, show up the K-1 class in the school pageant, and win the heart of one curly haired boy. Yup. Kindergarten is going to be a year to remember.

Bran' New Suit by pibroch (littleblackdog): Andrew's description had been sufficient to recognize him— a riot of honey brown curls, short in stature, a well-favoured face with expressive features— but it hadn't quite been enough to prepare Tom for the sharp, almost painful tug in his gut at the sight of the man. They had never met before, to the best of Tom's recollection, but there was something eerily and inexplicably familiar about him all the same.

Different species au fics

I've grown a hedge around my heart by pibroch (littleblackdog): "Thorin was the essence of so many Buckland oddities, distilled into one misfortunate young hobbit, much to his infinite embarrassment. Built like a stork, his father had said once, in an example of Thrain Brandybuck’s usual tactless humour. All beak and legs." Thorin Brandybuck, just recently come of age, still lives in his family’s smial in Buckland, with his parents and two younger siblings. Thorin is an odd duck amongst his relations and neighbours-- unsociable, grumpy, shy, and awkward. And beyond that, he looks rather strange even for a Bucklander, strongly favouring the thick, dark haired build of his Stoorish blood. It defies all sense and reason why Bilbo Baggins, an exemplar of all the respectable traits Thorin lacked, would ever desire a friendship with him. Bilbo, as Thorin discovers, is not always as sensible as he appears.

In which the dwarves are satyrs for reasons by HiddenKitty What the title says basically.

Bride of the demon king by DomesticGoddess: Thorin is King of the demons, a beast-like race feared by humans. Ever since the demons and humans formed a truce years ago, the humans have sent a young human every year as a tribute to the King of demons. Thorin is tired of having to deal with the tribute that has long since lost its meaning. The only tribute he'd be interested in is the boy he met fifteen years ago on the border of the demon and human realms. Despite his fantasies, Thorin knows the chances of ever seeing the boy again are slim to none, until they're not.

Lost He Wandered Under Leaves by serenbach: Thorin son of Thrain is a struggling blacksmith descended from a fallen line of kings. In an attempt to provide for his family over the winter, he reluctantly accepts an impossible sounding task - to hunt down an enchanted deer that lives in the Old Forest that borders the Shire, and make armour and weapons from its hide and antlers. He never expected to succeed. And he certainly never expected what he found to change his life so completely.

A Dryad's Tale by Bilbo Baggins by Moongazer12: Bilbo is a dryad (think little sibling to ents). Long ago a curse was placed upon him from destroying one of the rings of power. Whenever he touches someone with his bare skin he will make them insane. But despite this, he and Gandalf have gone on many adventures to help protect Middle Earth (What was the point to destroying the ring if something else destroyed it instead?) Gandalf has called on him once again to help on a quest, Bilbo just hopes that they read his amendments to the contract.

The quest but with a twist au fics

King, come at the red morning by Tawabids: Bilbo has heard fairytales of the lost prince of the dwarves, Thorin son of Thrain, who disappeared the day Smaug attacked the Lonely Mountain. But he does not believe in fairytales until he comes across the dwarf sleeping in the depths of Erebor, and kisses him back to life. Now Thorin - a hundred and fifty years out of his time - has to confront a world in which his city is empty, his people scattered, his baby brother Frerin is king, two nephews he's never met are missing in action, and a war is brewing right on his doorstep. And as if that wasn't complicated enough he's trapped in the body of an old man and falling stupidly in love with a gossipy, grudging little hobbit.

When the sun rises by Harry1981: Bilbo Baggins of Bag End was not a very respectable Hobbit. No respectable Hobbit had a sword and crossbow hanging in their home, nor did they have Dwarves as family. But Bilbo Baggins did, and all of Shire knew of his husband, blacksmith Thorin Oakenshield. When Bilbo comes home to find his Husband earlier than expected, he learns of a quest to reclaim Erebor. It is a death mission. Bilbo knows that Dwarves are stubborn creatures, and none more than Thorin himself. But nobody said that Bilbo himself was any less stubborn. So he will follow his dearest husband across all of Middle Earth, through plains and mountains and forests, all while hiding the true nature of their relationship (Dwarven politics never helped anyone), brushing off some old wounds (and getting new ones) and finding out new things about the dwarf Bilbo calls husband (and his extended family). Nobody ever said love was easy, after all.

Small, but fierce by DomesticGoddess: As a result of a magical mishap during the trip to the lonely mountain, Bilbo is reverted to a wee little hobbitling. Only in body, of course. His adult mind is still very aware of the indignity of it all (seriously! He doesn't need to be coddled, carried, and fed like a child). It turns out, dwarves love children and there is nothing cuter than Hobbit children. Bilbo soon realizes that he can get away with just about anything in his babyish form and starts taking full advantage of it. Even the grumpy brooding king can't deny the angelic little creature anything he desires (and Bilbo's going to milk that for all it's worth).

Your song like a home in my heart by Nennvial: In Middle Earth, all creatures have a soulmate. Not all have some, but if they do, it is a bond nothing can break, not even death. The more famous story of such a bound was the story of Bren and Luthien, who even defied detath. The way someone can find out that the other is one’s soulmate is through song: when they meet and hear the voice of the other, a song sings in their heart, which feels like home and makes them complete. They may refuse it if they wish to do so, but they hence risk a life of bitter looniness. Thorin Oakenshield and Bilbo Baggins are soulmates, but they must admit it to themselves throughout their journey to Erebor.

To Dungeons Deep (And Caverns Old) by KingUndertheMountain: Bilbo Baggins was not your average hobbit. Of course, he had the wonderfully groomed and well-taken-care-of hairy feet like every other one of his race, yes, but he was not like other hobbits. He was cursed. Or, as the witch who gave him the enchantment put it, was “gifted”. She had given him the “gift” of obedience – whenever there was a direct command given to him, for example “cook a large meal” or “take a walk”, he could not disobey. Not without a lot of pain and eventual submission.

Chocolate candy one-shots

The world is sleeping (my world is you) by katheneverwrites (mandolinearts): I asked Persephone, “How could you grow to love him? He took you from flowers to a kingdom where not a single living thing can grow.” Persephone smiled, “My darling, every flower on your earth withers. What Hades gave me was a crown made for the immortal flowers in my bones.” - Nikita Gill ---“What do you mean, my friend?” There is a line of thought that surfaces in Gandalf’s mind, but he drowns it before it can take root. Surely not. But Bilbo’s chuckle sets him on edge. The small, gentle god of harvest, nature, and flowers sits up straighter, and in his crown of flowers there is a wire of strong metal, his cloak is suddenly not colorful anymore but the deepest black and he is terrifying, horrific, powerful - “I married Thorin Oakenshield, King Under the World.”

Of seasons by northerntrash: As far as he could tell, he had been kidnapped, which in itself made this week more than a little unusual. In which Bilbo steals away the Lord of Death, and Thorin can't quite bring himself to stay angry about it.

Warm up by paranoid_fridge: On one of their walks, Bilbo tumbles into a stream. They make it back to Bag End and Bilbo demands Thorin warm him up.

Royal Blue And Crimson Red by Mistofstars: Here's what happened before and after Bilbo accidentally eavesdrops on Gandalf and Elrond at night in Rivendell, as they discuss Thorin's quest and his family's history. Oh, and Thorin and Bilbo share a room, of course ;)

I was young when I left home by Margo_Kim: There was a pity clapper somewhere in the third row. Thorin finished his fourth song to polite applause from the people who noticed that the song was finished, but within the smattering of claps was someone beating his hands together like he was trying to rhythmically kill a fly. There was usually one of those, the kind who notices that no one else is paying attention and so is determined to compensate for that regardless of how they feel about the actual music. Thorin ignored him. It was easy to do so—he'd always hated looking at the audience when the singing was done.

A matter of buttons by StupidFatPenguin: “Your shirt,” says Thorin, quite out of the blue, and Bilbo looks down his front to see if there is a spot of tea or jam or anything equally embarrassing spilled on it. He is relieved to find nothing of the sort and looks up at the dwarf with an eyebrow raised in question. Thorin sits mute, his still-smoking pipe forgotten in his hand. He looks on for long moments still, seems almost lost to a thought before he shifts and lifts his gaze to meet Bilbo’s inquiring face. “It is familiar to me. Did you not wear this on the eve we met?” In which Bilbo and Thorin re-enact the evening they met.

The ladder by Milliethekitty27: Inspired from a post made by wheeloffortune-design on tumblr. Tired of his lonely kitchen in Yavanna's Garden, Bilbo Baggins wonders if the dwarven love of being underground is true in death. If so, maybe his dwarves are living (ha ha) under the very land Bilbo is weeding. With that thought, Bilbo goes and asks Hamfast for a shovel.

Love hobbit by HybridOwl: Bilbo Baggins considers himself a bit of a cock up, all things considered. He never made it out of his small highway adjacent town, can't seem to stop chain-smoking, and overall has more to talk about with the plants in his shop than 90% of all the rest of Middle Earth. So when he's reading the morning paper and a love note that can't be for anyone but him pops up, he's pretty sure - almost positive, really - that he's being made fun of. "TO the chain-smoking little stud who collects two metros from Gamgee's Goods every morning, will you be my love hobbit? - Bearded Biker." (heavily inspired by tumblr posts)

Fusion with other fandoms au fics

The Second Time by authoressjean; Sebastian Moran can't pull the trigger on John Watson to save his own hide, and what the hell is it with the doctor, anyway? Then Gandalf shows up, meddlesome wizard, and reminds him none too gently of his past life: as Thorin Oakenshield, leader of a company that had once included a small hobbit named Bilbo Baggins. One that looked decidedly like John Watson. And this would be the perfect chance to make things right with Bilbo the way he really hadn't been able to before he died, and that's when Gandalf tells him John doesn't remember being Bilbo, and to leave him alone. Right. Like that's going to happen.

And sow a star divided in us by MistakenMagic: Short summary: Gays in space! Longer summary: After his first successful solo mission, Jedi Knight Bilbo Baggins, trained by High Council member and full-time nuisance, Master Gandalf, returns to the Jedi Temple on Coruscant. During an excursion to the sparring arena, he meets a group of Dwarven Jedi from Ered Luin, a mountainous planet located in the Outer Rim. Young padawans, Fili and Kili, are full of curiosity at this strange, barefoot Jedi, but Master Thorin, who appears to have the personality of a rancor and mental shields like blast doors, is less than impressed.

Comics you should definitely check

Every work by rutobuka, seriously they're criminally cute and they're not still favored by everyone without reason.

Retelling the Hobbit by Mellow_Comics: Bilbo has never been good at telling the "true" story of what happened on his journey to the Lonely Mountain. Now he's trying to turn the tale of his quest into a lighthearted children's book-- a bedtime story for his young nephew Frodo. But what really happened on his journey? And how did it actually affect him? This is a comic adaptation/retelling of the Hobbit! It's framed as a bedtime story that Bilbo is telling a younger Frodo.

For now these are some of my personal favourites! However, I'm sure my list will grow since my reading list has some gems still waiting for me to read, so be certain that there will be a part 2 of this list!

[hobbits-and-dinosaurs]

Lord of the Rings as animals

Frodo, Sam, Merry and Pippin 

wexel (curly haired) mice.

Pretty self explanatory, they are small, curious, eat a lot, and live in the ground.

Gandalf

Snowy owl

Snowy owls are notable for the fact that they will change from grey to white depending on the season, owls in general are often depicted as wise because of their natural intelligence. They are precision hunters with the ability to see long distances.

Aragorn

Grey wolf

Grey wolves are considered a rare species ( I.e. men or numenor) and ongoing reintroduction efforts have helped increase their number in the wild. Wolves are associated with intelligence, leadership, and form strong social connections with their peers.

Boromir

Grizzly bear

Large and intimidating but more often than not scared of humans, bears are associated with strength and hardiness. Grizzly bear mothers dedicate most of their time to raising and protecting their young and, notoriously, will maul anything that might harm them.

Gimli

Prairie dog

Prarie dogs live in large underground colonies and are very social animals. They often must avoid predators like black footed ferrets and birds of prey. Vigilance and bravery are associated with this animal.

Legolas

Stoat

A member of the mustelid family, these animals are small enough to squeeze in tight spaces and dexterous enough to be relatively good climbers. They often take down prey much larger than themselves and are known for their hoarding behavior towards food. Being a member of the weasel family they are also very playful and social with their family.

other characters of note:

Elrond

European badger

Farimir 

Black bear

King Theoden, Eomer, Eowyn

African lions

Arwen

North American river otter

Saruman

Barn owl

Sauron

Black panther

Nazgûl 

African wild dogs

(If you’ve seen them hunt you’ll know why)

[leham-n-daavocado]

The Grid as Tolkien Characters, Part 1

Lewis: Aragorn

This should be obvious. He overcomes the circumstances of his birth for greatness.

Valtteri: Bard the Bowman

Forthright. Does the right thing when faced with a challenge. All around good dude.

Daniel: Merry

Obviously. Honey badger: He's going with Eowyn to fiiiight! Curly hair. Fun. Cheeky. The brains of the operation. But just. Would enjoy second breakfast.

Lando: Pippen

Fun. Cheeky. But decidedly not the brains. Shocked at lack of second breakfast.

Max: Boromir

Built up as being better than everyone else by paternal figures... but in reality, he's just as good as anyone else and could probably make more friends if he wasn't socialized with that mentality. Would die to save Merry (Daniel) (and Pippen (Lando)).

Checo: Faramir

The well socialised one.  Works hard to get the job done, but will always be in the shadow of his brother.

(Christian: Denethor

Shows unhealthy favouritism to one child over the other. Would do anything to prevent Aragon (Lewis) from being king. )

Sebastian: Gandalf

Seasoned. Watches out for others. Playful. If he dies, he's coming back stronger. (Ferarri is the Balrog)

Lance: Thranduil

Mostly vibes... but...Wealth. Power. Prestige. Doesn't really do much with it.

(Lawrence: Saruman

If the shoe fits...)

[the-butterfly-blues]

The Ring-Bearer

An Eventual Legolas x Reader

Chapter Two

Summary: Joining the company, [Name] still keeps her guard up and rightfully so. When Thorin doesn't listen to her worries, the dwarves find themselves in a tight, burlap-esque, situation. Word Count: 3.2k

Once [Name] has her things packed in a small bag, her old Gondorian Armor from her time in Minas Ithil on, and a cloak wrapped around her shoulders, they continue their travels the next morning, stopping at a town to purchase her a horse before they truly get back on the road. The days pass by quickly as she's easily accepted into the group, each dwarf enjoying her confident presence. Balin had been the first to truly accept her as part of the company while Thorin and Dwalin followed surprisingly quickly. Thorin feels that she understands why he's trying to do something so dangerous and is not just blatantly following him into a possible dragon's den because he's the rightful King Under the Mountain or because she's looking for an adventure. Dwalin, though he doesn't really show it, enjoys her company, especially after she had asked him to spar with her in order to assure that she's still as good as she once was. Despite her winning quite a few times in the end, the bald dwarf admired her strength and will to continuously jump back up no matter how many times he had knocked her down in the beginning. Currently, she rides silently in the back, trying her best to keep herself awake as she had stayed up the past two nights on watch, a horrid feeling growing in her gut with every step they take towards their goal. The dwarves talk, sticking to light-hearted topics at the moment, not wishing to dampen the mood like the grey clouds in the sky have begun to do. Once the light drizzle becomes more, they all choose to stay silent other than aggravated mumbles. [Name] on the other hand, smiles slightly at the rain, believing it to be soothing as she thinks back to a being she met long ago. Carnán was a glorious spirit that she had the honor of meeting and protecting. The forest spirit was one of the more polite beings she's met in all her time living.

"Here, Mr. Gandalf, can't you do something about this deluge?" "It is raining, Master Dwarf, and it will continue to rain until the rain is done. If you wish to change the weather of the world, you should find yourself another wizard."

Though she enjoys this weather and wishes to lighten the mood, she chooses to stay silent. With the years she had spent alone or fighting a war with orcs, her confidence in her social skills has deteriorated greatly. They soon come upon an abandoned farm, choosing to camp there for the night as they hop off their ponies and horses, though [Name] and Gandalf have a feeling that they shouldn't stop here.

"Fíli, Kíli, look after the ponies. Make sure you stay with them." "Thorin, I don't believe we should stay here." "Óin, Glóin, get a fire going." "I don't have a good feeling about this, Master Dwarf."

Placing his attention on the woman, he sighs slightly at her worry while placing a comforting hand on the middle of her back, not being able to reach higher without it looking weird or feeling awkward. He had noticed the slow detrition in her sleep the past two days, though he couldn't blame her. If he were in her position of going out into the world after all these years, he'd definitely have his guards up too.

"You're just tired, [Name]. Go rest." "I don't think it's-" "Bilbo!"

The hobbit quickly perks up at being called, though the nervousness on his face is evident as he'd never once been called on by the company's leader.

"Make sure she gets some rest."

He to had noticed how her eyes would slowly close and her head would dip slightly before she'd jolt up during their journey today. Nodding in hopes to help his only possible friend in the company, he makes his way over to her as Thorin and Gandalf move to talk to one another in private. Bilbo leads her to a comfortable looking space at the trunk of a tree and helps her get comfortable however he can.

"Is there anything I can do for you?" "Your calming presence is more than enough, Bilbo. I think I'm just not used to traveling anymore." "It is quite difficult to get used to, I'll give you that."

With a big exhale, [Name] finally begins to relax with Bilbo leaning against a log beside her.

"Did you know that Mordor is cut up into different sections just like the rest of Middle-Earth? Like how there's Bywater and then there's Bree and the Lone-lands." "No, I didn't. What are the places in Mordor called if you don't mind my asking?" "I don't. You seem like one of the only people here that would actually be interested in that sort of thing, so I thought I'd bring it up. I enjoy speaking of my more calming adventures."

Her eyes close as she thinks over the places she had been in Mordor about seven hundred years ago.

"There's the snowy region of Seregost, Cirith Ungol which holds a powerful orc stronghold, to me there wasn't anything too memorable in Gorgoroth, and then Núrn was filled with greenery and forests. There's a few more, but I've never been so I couldn't tell you much." "I know it's Mordor and all, but which place was your favorite?" "Easily Núrn."

Yawning softly, she readjusts herself into a more comfortable position, earning a small smile from Bilbo as she's finally getting some rest.

"And why's that?" "Mostly because of this beautiful forest spirit, Carnán. She was gorgeous. Talion and I helped save her forest from an orc necromancer that wished to burn it all down. I like to think that she's all around us, but hopefully I get to visit her again one day." "Who's Talion?"

The hobbit's question is left unanswered as light snores come from her lips. Knowing that he's accomplished his job, he now moves to see if he could help the rest of the company while constantly glancing over to see if she was okay. Throughout the evening and into the night, she doesn't move and everyone believes it best to let her sleep and allow her to get extra breakfast in the morning if she wishes. Everything seemed to be going fine without the wizard or [Name] until Fíli and Kíli come running, shouting that they have a problem. Their shouts surprisingly only stir her for a moment before she slumps back against the tree.

"We should wake [Name]. Surely, she knows how to handle three trolls!" "No, we can rescue the hobbit on our own. She needs her rest." "But this is what we brought her for, isn't it, Thorin?" "We requested her assistance with the dragon, not things as simple as trolls."

Having made their decision on leaving [Name] there, they rush off to try and protect Bilbo, only to fail and get placed into sacks or above a fire. Upon not hearing any of her company's voices or loud snores, [Name] slowly opens her eyes, only to jolt up as she notices their absence. Grabbing her sword, she quickly runs off into the forest, following a path of footsteps. Once she reaches the end of their footprints, she takes notice of their situation. Spotting the dwarves over the fire, she knows that she can't waste too much time and rushes into the middle of the camp with her sword in hand. The dwarves watch from their sacks as [Name] throws herself at the trolls. Many of them shout at her, worried because they're sure that she'll get squashed considering it's three giants against her.

"What do you think you're doing?!"

Thorin shouts, having easily become fond of the former knight throughout their travels. Jumping out of the way of a swinging club, she glances at him and shouts back. The look upon her face is one of both pure concentration and slight irritation, shocking the dwarves as they have yet to see such an expression from their so far kind and caring knight.

"Saving you, silly dwarf!"

Rolling under the next swing, she's quick to jump to her feet to slash and slice at them. The dwarves wriggle in their sacks, trying to get free of their confinements to help her, but they have no luck and are forced to watch as she's picked up and pulled into the air by the back of her cloak. They become extremely worried as the troll dangles her over its open mouth, aiming to eat her.

"Set her down!" "You don't want to eat her!" "Yeah, eat us instead! We're delicious!"

Shouting and yelling to try and get its attention, they're all shocked into silence as she unbuttons her cloak and lands on the trolls face. With one foot on its nose and the other on its chin, she shoves her sword down its throat with a shout, causing it to start coughing up a copious amount of blood. She jumps down, rolling to soften her landing before quickly killing the second one in its state of shock. The third troll screams in terror and tries to run, though [Name] pays no mind to that as she takes a sprinting start to run up its back. Once on its shoulders, she quickly shoves her sword into the side of its neck before swinging down to its front. Keeping her sword where it is, she quickly grabs her dagger and slices its throat just as the sun rises, turning their bodies to stone. Everyone stays silent for a moment as they hadn't expected that kind of fight for a simple former knight, though they quickly shake themselves out of their stupor and holler praises at her.

"Way to go [Name]!" "We knew you could do it!" "That was awesome!" "What a show!" "You did great!"

With a quick thank you to all of their compliments, she releases Óin from his sack so he can help the others. While cutting him free, she glances at Thorin with half a grin.

"If you had only listened to my worries, this never would have happened." "I'll learn to take them to heart from now on. You did well, better than I expected for a simple knight." "Simple? Have you forgotten that I traveled Mordor for some time as well?"

Gently, she playfully taps his head with the hilt of her dagger before moving to put out the fire and cutting the rest loose, allowing them to stretch and think over everything that had just happened in the past ten minutes.

"I came as quickly as I could. Is everyone okay?"

Gandalf questions as he appears from behind a nearby bush. The dwarves collectively answer him, each going on about how [Name] had come and helped them out of their predicament causing her cheeks to flush. The wizard smiles as he walks up to the young woman and places a hand on her shoulder.

"You did excellently, [Name]! I knew you would be a great addition." "Thank you, Master Wizard."

She shares with him a small smile before Thorin pulls away his attention. [Name] stares at the trolls for a moment with a frown, saddened by the loss of her items. The one that had picked her up, landed on top of her cloak while the other holds her sword in its neck tightly from turning to stone.

"What's with that look, lass?"

Bofur shakes her from her slight mourning, earning a half smile before she directs his gaze to her sword. She can easily replace the cloak, but that blade meant a lot to her.

"The sword? Well, I'm sure we can figure something out." "I know we will."

Still feeling his gaze on her, she explains how that sword carried her through her time in Minas Ithil and even in Mordor. It was a trustworthy blade that she wished she would never have to part with.

"I'll tell you what! When we reclaim Erebor and get the forges up and running, we'll make you a new sturdy blade as a thank you for sacrificing your own." "No, no, I couldn't ask you to waste your materials on me. It's a simple sword, I'm sure I'll stumble across a new one some time soon." "It's the least we can do for all your help." "Bofur, I'm serious. I don't need you to-" "You can try, but there's no getting out of this one, lass. Especially not when I mention it to the rest of the company."

With a sigh, she caves, giving him a grateful smile and hug before she must grab her bag as they all start moving on to find the troll's hoard. The trip to the trolls cave may be short, but it leaves more than enough time for the dwarves to ask her questions.

"How did you learn to do something like that?" "An old friend of mine taught me when we traveled Mordor together. There were more than enough Olog-hai to practice on. It did help a lot that these weren’t as thick-skulled or smart.” "What's an Olog-hai?" "It's basically a troll that's immune to sunlight and created for war. They're some of the biggest brutes you can ever come across in Mordor. I'd say only a Graug could beat an Olog-hai in hand to hand combat. Let's hope you lot never have to see any of those awful creatures."

Once they reach the cave, Bilbo, though wishing to stay outside, follows closely behind [Name] as she holds her own torch. He had only chosen to follow her in order to ask a possibly personal question. Considering how tired she was the day before, he wonders if she meant to share the man from Mordor's name.

"[Name]? May I ask you something?" "Of course, Bilbo. Ask away."

Stopping by a pile of weapons and gems covered in dust and cobwebs, she hands the torch to the hobbit so she can kneel to look through the pile. She didn't much like taking things from the deceased, but she'll only be taking a sword and nothing more.

"Yesterday, before you fell asleep, you mentioned someone." "Carnán the forest spirit, yes." "No, not her. Someone else."

The cobwebs are easy to brush away, revealing a few weapons, but a sheathed blade easily catches her attention.

"Someone by the name of Talion."

Bilbo worries that he's said something wrong as she freezes, her hand no longer reaching for the sword. Releasing a long and heavy sigh, her shoulders sag slightly.

"Talion was the man who led me through Mordor. As the orcs chose to call me Roamer, he was known by many names. Ranger, Gravewalker, even Bright Lord for a short period of time. The list goes on. He was the closest thing I ever had to a father." "What of your actual father?" "My father was a drunk and prone to violence."

Taking ahold of the blade, the hobbit now chooses to stay quiet, regretting ever asking or bringing up the man's name. Easily taking notice of this, as she can sense his nervous sorrow, she looks over her shoulder to give him her full attention.

"Never feel sorry for asking questions, Bilbo. In fact, I'm glad you brought it up. It's nice to speak of him again."

Spotting his small smile in the faint light of the torch, she finally unsheathes the sword and stares at it with wide eyes, mesmerized by the memorable design.

"This is a Gondorian sword... How in the world did it get all the way out here?"

She knows that she'll never receive an answer and instead stands with its hilt in her hand, giving it a few test swings. Bilbo watches in awe as she does a few tricks with the newfound weapon.

"I believe this is the one, Master Hobbit. Let's get out of here, I can only ignore the stench for so long."

The hobbit happily follows her outside of the cave, putting the torch out along the way. He stays close to her, happy that he hadn't ruined his only possible friendship among the company. His attention is soon moved to Gandalf as he offers him a sword.

"The blade is of Elvish make which means it will glow blue when orcs or goblins are nearby." "I have never used a sword in my life." "And I hope you never have to. But if you do, remember this: true courage is about knowing not when to take a life, but when to spare one." "Those are very wise and true words, Gandalf."

[Name] states while lightly placing a hand on the hobbit's shoulder with a kind smile.

"I'll teach you the basics once we get the chance."

Suddenly, they can all hear something large coming from their right. Leaving Bilbo, she moves to stand near the front, her new sword ready to slice into any form of enemy, though once a sleigh of rabbits stop in front of her, she lowers her blade in confusion. Surely no person with evil intent would have a sleigh of adorable rabbits and she's proven right as Gandalf greets this odd man as Radagast the Brown.

"I've never seen rabbits so large. They're honestly kind of cute."

[Name] comments as the two wizards step away to speak privately and the rest of the company sticks together. A sharp howl can be heard from where they stand, causing all of them to pause in what they were doing. Pulling out her sword again, [Name] looks to the crag behind them with a pointed look.

"Was that a wolf? Are there- are there wolves out there?"

If she wasn't so concentrated on the direction of where the sound came from, she'd ask the same question as her hobbit friend.

"Wolves? No, that is not a wolf."

This large beast jumps over the crag, leaping at [Name] who stands in the midst of the company. Ducking under it, she slices it's stomach open, partially drenching her in blood. Another comes from their side, leaping into the group just as the other had. Luckily, Kíli is prepared, shooting it with an arrow and allowing Dwalin to kill it in its daze.

"Warg-Scouts! Which means an orc pack is not far behind." "Orc pack?" "Warg-Scouts?"

Looking just as confused as Bilbo, Balin quickly explains that the beast she had just slain was a warg as Gandalf basically interrogates Thorin.

"I've only ever dealt with caragors, not wargs." "Caragors?" "Smaller cat-like beasts. As much as I hated them, I think I prefer them now."

This only proves that despite knowing quite a bit about the monsters in Mordor, she still has things to learn in the rest of Middle-Earth. With Radagast offering to deter the orc pack, allowing them a chance to get away, the company quickly prepares to run.

"These are Gundabad Wargs, they will outrun you." "These are Rhosgobel Rabbits, I'd like to see them try."