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i hate that i can’t even ride the high from my concert because my life is so consistently depressing and hellish lmao 🙃 it’s depressing to come back down to reality after such a good day. like it really makes me realize how joyless my life has become. everything just blurs together
#and i’m just tired of like everything around me feeling like it’s drifting away and becoming more unreachable#like i never even get to finish a conversation with half of my friends because they just forget to respond to me#thank god for sushi and asant consistently replying even when they’re busy lmao#no one else even bothers to really check in now unless i’m in like ACTIVE crisis it really sucks#not even in like a ‘i need people to hear me vent’ way#i just don’t feel important to the majority of the people in my life. at all#or maybe it’s just i feel like i care about and prioritize them a lot more than they do me#like? i had more coworkers text me on my birthday than actual friends#and i fucking hate my birthday so i get it to some degree#but it just hurts my feelings? idk? i feel like such an afterthought all the time to people. like a ghost#and i feel like i’m not interesting or good enough to keep anyone around or hold their attention#my own brother didn’t even wish me a happy birthday. at all lol#are my expectations just too high?#it’s just lonely. i wish i didn’t feel so alone
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Six Degrees of Separation
Rating: Teen || Chapters: 1/4 || Word Count 1.4k
Summary:
The Dead Boy Detectives run into a familiar pub while out on a case, and Crystal has to contend with an unfortunate event from her past.
Hob Gadling wasn't planning on adopting three teenagers and a full grown woman, but stranger things have happened in his long centuries of life.
Read here on Tumblr, or over on AO3
dedicated to @softest-punk for making me emotional about Hob adopting the kids in DBD 💖
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“In here!” Edwin shouts, gesturing frantically at the entrance to a pub that looks vaguely familiar to Crystal. Unfortunately, she doesn’t have much time to wonder before the banshee chasing them lets out a blood curdling scream. Crystal rushes in with Charles right behind her, pushing the door and slamming it shut behind her. Thankfully the pub seems to be completely empty except for one man.
A man who looked extremely pissed off to see them.
“Oh bloody hell, fuck no, not you, out!” the older man shouts, moving out from behind the bar and looking ready to chase them out by force if necessary. Crystal braces herself, glancing around frantically for some sort of back door that she can bolt to if necessary. She’s pretty sure she can outrun him.
Charles and Edwin however, are a different story.
“Hob, it’s us!” Charles exclaims, throwing up his hands in an attempt to show no harm.
“We’re sorry for bringing a ghost to your door, Mr Gadling,” Edwin adds. “If you’ll just let me borrow one of your books to get rid of this banshee, we’ll be out of your hair.”
“Not you two, her,” the man, Hob (what the hell kind of name was that?) growls, pointing at Crystal accusingly. Edwin and Charles turn to her in shock, and Crystal is about to protest that she has no idea what this man is on about, but then the memory of how she knows Hob Gadling comes flooding back to her.
The pub they’d run into was The New Inn and Crystal had almost burned it down last year because some girl she hated at school had come here for her 18th birthday. With all of Crystal’s friends, sans Crystal. Ex-friends now, since Crystal had tried to burn the place down with the whole party still inside. Hob had, unsurprisingly, pressed charges, and it took a lot of money from her parents to make everything go away.
“I’m sorry!” Crystal yells, just as the banshee screeches and slams its body against the door behind them. It lights up an iridescent blue, a warding against ghosts. Of course Crystal had to go and fuck up the one supernatural relationship she had because she was an idiot asshole last year.
“I know this isn’t a great time, but I’m kind of a different person now?” Crystal says, having no idea how to even begin to explain the weird circumstances of the last month. “I swear what my past self did isn't who I am now,” she adds, also raising her hands to show she means no harm.
“She’s part of the Dead Boy Detectives Agency, mate,” Charles interjects, while Edwin nods furiously in agreement. “Please don’t throw her out!”
The banshee lets out another screech and slams itself against the door, rattling the frame so hard that Crystal’s afraid it might fly off the hinges at any moment. Whatever ward Hob had placed, it wasn’t going to hold out for that much longer.
“What the hell is going on?!” a familiar voice cries out, and then Jenny Green of all people is coming out of what Crystal assumes is the kitchen. She’s also brandishing a butcher knife, because why would any of that change now that she lives across the pond?
“Jenny?!” Charles and Edwin yell.
“Oh fuck,” the older woman curses, glancing back and forth between the three of them and Hob. Crystal really hopes they haven’t just gotten Jenny fired. Finding a job had been tough enough for her when they'd relocated, and she had refused any help financially from Crystal.
“You know them?!” Hob asks, shock clear in his voice.
“It’s a long story,” Jenny grumbles, then screams when the banshee throws itself against the door again. “What the fuck, why did you lead a ghost here? ”
The door rattles and creaks, and the ward around the pub shimmers and vibrates angrily, which seems to finally prompt Hob to action. He straightens his back, rubs a hand over his face, and then takes one, two, three deep breaths before he looks them all over appraisingly.
“Jenny, get the salt from the back,” Hob orders, gesturing her back to the kitchen. “The iron knives should be on the shelf next to them. Edwin, you know where the tomes are,” he adds pointing upwards, likely towards a room on the second floor of the pub. Jenny and Edwin nod quietly before disappearing to their designated posts, leaving Crystal and Charles alone with Hob.
“Right, so since when have the Dead Boys gotten themselves involved with trust fund brats?” Hob asks, still eyeing Crystal warily as if he expects her to pull out a lighter at any moment.
“Since this trust fund brat got possessed by a demon and got her memories stolen,” Crystal answers, wincing when she realizes how harsh that sounds. “Sorry. I just recently got them back and it's been a weird time. I really am sorry though. For like, nearly burning this place to the ground cause I was mad.”
“You did what? ” Charles cries out, his mouth agape. “Please tell me that was all David’s doing.”
Crystal scrunches up her face and then shakes her head. “I wish it was, but no. Just plain old shitty Crystal,” she answers truthfully.
Hob looks between the two of them, then sighs, his expression softening.
“Look, clearly you’ve done some soul searching and I am the last person who should be allowed to hold a grudge against someone who’s done some bad things,” he says, then gestures to Charles. “If the boys vouch for you, then I’m willing to bury the hatchet. All right, Ms Von-Hovercraft?”
“Please just call me Crystal,” Crystal pleads. She really hated being referred to by her surname. It still felt weird and foreign to her, after everything she had gone through. Hob huffs, and this time when he looks at her, there isn’t a shred of contempt in his expression.
“Yeah okay. Crystal,” he says warmly. “You can call me Hob.”
Crystal wants to ask where the hell the name Hob comes from, because she’s pretty sure she remembers his name being Richard , but before she can say anything, Edwin and Jenny come back and Hob turns his full attention to taking care of the banshee that’s trying to get past the wards he has around the entire pub.
“You’re lucky Tuesday’s a slow night,” Hob says, before he starts flipping through the tome. “Jenny, Crystal, make a salt circle by the tables over there,” he adds, pointing to his left. “You’re going to need to lead her there so we can trap her.”
Crystal and Jenny make as large of a circle as they can, pouring generous amounts of salt into the floor. When they’re done, Hob instructs them to the front of the pub, where the door is still rattling and glowing angrily. Edwin and Charles are standing next to Hob, Charles with his cricket bat out, and Edwin and Hob ready to chant the spell within the tome.
“When I count to three, open the door and run like hell into the salt circle,” Hob tells them. “One, two, THREE!”
Crystal throws open the door and both she and Jenny cover their ears as they run towards the salt circle. The banshee’s cries are even louder now that she’s inside the pub, but their plan works. She follows them straight into the circle, then screeches again in anger once she realizes she cannot follow them out. Her long hands try to grab for Jenny’s apron, but Charles materializes right at the circle’s edge to bat her hand away.
Hob and Edwin start chanting some spell in what Crystal assumes is Latin, and the banshee screeches at an even louder volume than before. The salt circle alights a bright gold, and Crystal and Jenny are practically thrown backwards by the force of the magic taking effect.
The banshee lets out one more high pitched scream, and then her dark grey dress suddenly becomes stark white, dark and wet black hair paling slowly to a soft light brown. When the banshee lifts her face, her eyes are no longer sunken and black, but wide and bright green.
She’s beautiful, now that she’s no longer in pain.
The Night Nurse shows up shortly afterwards, collecting the woman and gently reassuring her that she’s going to a better place. She looks at Hob like she’s offended by his very existence, which the man takes in stride and cheerfully waves her off, telling her to say hello to her boss for him.
“Right then,” Hob says after the banshee and the Night Nurse have left. “Now that that’s taken care of, care to explain to me what the bloody hell is the connection with you lot?”
#dead boy detectives#dead boy detectives fanfic#the sandman#the sandman fanfic#hob gadling#crystal palace#edwin payne#charles rowland#jenny green#will eventually be payneland and dreamling but this part is gen#seiya writes#seiya writes dbda
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How can Molly's death be considered a major mistake? It's the crux of the entire campaign.
so I think about this a lot, because you're right, and it really comes down to like...a lot of factors in how people interact with fiction, and some stuff I feel about fandom.
The short answer is that Molly is some people's favorite character, and they really wanted to watch him for 141 episodes and not just 26, and they didn't get to, and so it's valid to feel sad about that. But I think what personally grinds my gears is the idea that it's a mistake and because this is a Fan Favorite character he SHOULD have come back. Setting aside the fact that he had both his fans and his detractors from the start and a lot of people (myself included) who found him irritating didn't say much for a good chunk of C2 because, well, he was dead, this isn't a fucking competitive reality show. You don't get to vote on your phones to decide who wins a resurrection.
I think the longer answer is that there is a certain type of person in fandom, born of a certain type of person in social media communities, who just...is not willing or interested in considering not just that their experiences, preferences, and philosophy are not universal, but also that they are not objectively best and correct and that everyone who disagrees is wrong. It's often really common in, though not exclusive to, people who have particularly limited experiences - young (like, teenager/early 20s), people who haven't lived in a diverse area or in multiple different areas, people who for whatever reason do not get out much - which both makes sense (haven't been exposed to a ton of different perspectives irl) but also means that you get people who, for all they may talk about global politics, kind of unconsciously seem to act as though everyone they interact with online is a variant of someone from the same 3000 person town in the United States in which they've spent all 21 years of their life. ANYWAY getting back to the main point I feel like Molly attracted a lot of that kind of person, who just...doesn't get that while Molly is, to them, a deeply validating expression of gender identity, for many people he is "guy you meet at your friend's birthday party in a two-bedroom 6 floor walk up and within 5 seconds he has pissed you off so profoundly with his overfamiliarity that you go into the kitchen and mainline as much vanilla vodka as possible to not stab this guy with a secondhand knife that says "CHEESE!" on it even though you hate vanilla vodka and it's summer in NYC and you're on the 6th floor in a small apartment with too many people so it's approximately 117 degrees Fahrenheit in this kitchen and the vodka isn't much cooler, and you succeed in this goal, and then after sending your friend who couldn't make it because they were at a family thing that weekend a picture of a rat on the tracks of the 3 train with a caption "this u?" at 1:54 in the morning you're like "so this guy Molly was there" and they're like "oh my god I met him at Cameron's last party, he SUCKS" and you're like "I KNOW". Like a lot of people just do not get that Molly was very popular with their circle, and also a lot of people either were neutral-to-not-feeling-it. This is before we get into the post-death idealization of who he was that takes him from "irritating but I think he'd have grown on me in some ways eventually had he lived" to "horrible and insufferable fake-ass bitch."
And then we get to the true impasse: the idea that something that does not fulfill every single one of your personal wishes might still be a great story.
I'm certainly not perfect, and there's things I thought I wanted for the end of C2 that I didn't get, and there's some things I do wish we'd have gotten to see (or that we'd have done in C3), but I like to think that I try to remain at least partially open to the possibilities. I like to think that my enjoyment of a story isn't contingent on whether one single character survives, even if they are my favorite (and I say this as someone whose favorite ASOIAF character was immediately Ned Stark, a statement that should surprise no one who follows me) nor that the story precisely reaffirms my existing worldview. I want stories to tell me something new and interesting that wouldn't come from my own head, and I want them to sell me on it. I think that a lot of people lost the thread of the importance of representation, namely, they forgot that while it's great to see people like you in a story, you should also be trying to see people not like you and perspectives that aren't yours. I am extremely defensive of my and other people's right to say "I didn't like this story and here is why" without someone being like "Give it a chance! Here's why I think it's good" but at the same time, there is a difference between "I really wish Molly had stayed alive and I don't like that he died," and "everything that happened after he died was A Mistake because it wasn't what I Wanted, and someone should fix this." Like that's what toddlers do. That's not an adult way of interacting with narrative.
So those people don't even get to the point of "the entire campaign is deeply influenced by the loss of Molly; that is what binds the rest of the Nein together and makes them what they are; the fact that Lucien wears the face of a departed friend is crucial to the entire final arc comprising about 20% of the campaign; and the fact that he does not come back, but someone new, with new chances and new choices to make does is emblematic of a campaign about people who find that they cannot undo their pasts, but neither are they trapped or damned by them." They're stuck at "guy I liked died and I'm throwing a tantrum 6 years later."
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The Secret: Alden Parker x Reader
Tagging: @kmc1989 @sarakafarrah@mandy426@caffeinatedwoman@elefrog25-blog
You’re mad at him. Alden can tell because you’ve re-arranged the items on his desk. You know it drives him completely crazy. His workspace has a certain feng shui, everything in its rightful place but today, his stapler’s on the wrong side, his orchid’s tilted at a 90 degree angle and he doesn’t even know where his hole punch is.
He sighs as he returns the stapler to its correct place because the truth is he should have told you he was meeting up with Viv. He just didn’t want to get into it because it brings up a lot of other things, things he doesn’t want to talk about.
He knows it’s not the fact he caught up with Vivian that bothers you, it’s the fact he kept it a secret, the fact you found out because you literally ran into them. He’d told you he had an early meeting as you were heading out for your jog, promised he’s catch up with you at lunch if you were both in the office.
He’d been coming out of the Café Futo with Viv when he’d glanced up and saw you coming, skin flushed, ear buds in. You’d been talking about changing up your running route, he just hadn’t realised in which direction it would take you.
He’d seen the look on your face, the moment you’d realised he’d been keeping something from you. Your ex-husband used to do that too. He’d fuck other women, make you think it was all in your head. He’d taken a step towards you, but you were already gone.
“You haven’t told her.” Viv had said as you disappeared from his view. “You should explain why we do this once a year.”
“It’s not that simple.” He tells her and Vivian gives him the look he knows so well.
“This thing, it erodes marriages.” She reminds him as she removes her car keys from her jacket pocket. “It destroyed ours.”
He waits for you at the apartment that night but you don’t come home. Some of your clothes are gone along with your phone charger. You’ve only taken a few items and he thinks that’s a blessing, it’s a sign you’re coming back. Right now you just need space.
The next time he sees you, he’s stepping onto the elevator. You don’t say anything when he takes up residence alongside you, the grip on your purse tightens and he hates that he’s causing that tension, that he’s the one doing this to you. He has the power right here in his hands to stop all of this. He just needs to strong enough to say it.
“Viv and I…” He says quietly. “We used to have a daughter. Yesterday was her birthday.”
You tilt your head towards him and he stares straight ahead at the closed doors.
“Losing her is the worst thing that has ever happened to me.” He tells you, swallowing hard against the agony in his chest. “I still can’t talk about.”
“Alden…” You begin and his jaw clenches because this he thinks, this is the worst thing he’s every done to you.
“I never meant to keep it from you. I just…” The words die on his lips because simply there is no way to explain it.
“Alden…” You whisper, your hand slipping into his. He tilts his head towards you then and you can see his heart breaking into a million pieces right before your eyes. “Alden, I’m sorry.”
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Like My Work? - Why Not Buy Me A Coffee
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Could I have a carmen Aziza fic where Yn is new to the prison and she always feels like someone’s staring at her and one day she catches carmen staring at her and gets really flustered then carmen starts flirting with her and becomes posessive over her then one day she drags Yn to the library and kisses her and basically confesses how she wants Yn all for herself
my love, mine all mine
my love mine all mine - mitski
word count: 5.9k
warnings: obsessive, possessive and protective behavior, flirting, kissing, toxic behavior, a bit of violence, threats, cursing, stalking, harry potter part 2 hate (I'm truly sorry)
summary: y/n is new to the prison and always feels like she is being watched. one night in the tv room, she turns around to the person who is watching her, only then realizing how gorgeous her observer is. they form a bond through several sets of events, slowly falling for each other. y/n slowly gets to know ouija's protective and possessive nature and at one birthday party of y/n's bunkmate, that behavior hits its peak. provocated by jealousy, frustration and confusing feelings, ouija makes a messy confession, explaining how she wants y/n all to herself
a/n: heyy, sorry that this took so long! I had a lot going on with school and writer's block so that I literally had no motivation to write. Anyway, I put a lot of work into this and I hope you like it (pls tell me what you think!!). I hope the flirting isn't too awkward, I'm still figuring out how to do that. I hope you enjoy and that I've done your idea justice. also this takes place in season 4
You were walking towards the entrance of Litchfield Penitentiary, the prison where you would be spending the next 3 years of your life. You had been charged with drug trafficking and distribution, all because some scared little snitch who didn't want to go to prison had ratted the whole cartel out. Even your drug lord was now facing a sentence of 9 years. 9 fucking years.
Your lawyer, who had defended you in trial, had been really shitty and literally just gave up on you. He didn't even try to make your sentence shorter, that sorry excuse of a man. Lazy fuck.
Morello, the weird Italian lady who drove you and some other people down to the prison, opened the gate and let you and the other new inmates inside. You couldn't believe you were now an "inmate", it was so weird to think of yourself that way.
"Welcome home everyone!", she exclaimed, giving you an encouraging smile.
You were lucky to get out of the cold van, it was January after all and since it had already snowed, the temperature had dropped down several degrees. So it was a relief to step into the warmer walls of the prison, not having to freeze your ass off in the snow.
The first thing you noticed when you stepped into the halls was how crowded it was. You were tempted to just turn around and run, trying to escape the stuffy air and suffocating feeling that was slowly spreading inside of you. Other inmates were constantly passing your little group, shooting you intimidating glances or smiling dangerously at you. You were uncomfortable, but not scared.
It just reminded you of the halls of your high school back then. Loud, uncomfortable and always overfilled. And god, the popular girls who used to bully you. To say the least, you were used to this.
Morello guided you through the prison, showing you where the commissary, bathrooms and everything else was. You were just passing the TV room, looking inside for a second when you made eye contact with a brown haired woman. The woman frowned at you, looking you up and down. You frowned back and kept walking, turning away from the door.
What the fuck was that?
You sighed and shook your head, telling yourself not to think too much of it. It had only been a small encounter, nothing too significant. At least not enough to get you in trouble. For now.
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚
You were shown to your dorm, where you occupied the bunk above a woman named Brandy Epps. It was obvious she was extremely racist, you even heard her discussing something about "white lives matter" or "white pride", which you took as a sign to stay the fuck away from her. She continued to make dirty comments about other inmates in the prison while you were busy making your bed.
You turned around to listen to her when you were done, staring at her in disgust and listening to the insults that were coming out of her mouth so easily. You shook your head in disbelief.
You must've been staring at her for too long as the woman turned around, obviously pissed off.
"You got some kind of problem?", she questioned threateningly, getting closer to where you were standing.
"No", you huffed, looking away. You really didn't want to start any trouble on your first day. Best to avoid tricky situations.
"Good. I see you staring like that again, we got a problem, you hear me?"
You sighed. You should've known people would have anger issues in here. That people would get aggressive over the smallest things, because they didn't have anything better to do. Because prison was a shithole and it was fucking tiring to simply just exist there. You certainly didn't want to end up like her, but you feared you were going to have no choice in the future.
"Sure."
Before she could say anything else, you made your way to the cafeteria for dinner.
Due to the prison's overcrowding, the blocks were divided up at each meal. You and your block ate with Cell Block C or the so-called "Spanish Harlem", as Morello had already explained to you.
With your plate of food in hand, you sat down at the end of some table and started eating. You were extremely hungry, exhausted from the stress of arriving in the prison.
Suddenly, you felt two pairs of eyes burn holes into your back and you just knew someone was staring at you. You forced yourself to not turn around, not wanting to start a fight on your first day. One never knew what could happen in prison, you might get jumped just because you sat in the wrong seat or stared at someone the wrong way, almost like it did with the racist bitch back in your dorm.
It made you uncomfortable but you focused on the disgusting brown liquid in front of you that was supposed to be "chili con carne", forcing it down your throat and hoping, no praying, that that person was going to leave you alone.
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚
The next few days you felt as if you were being watched the entire time, feeling that burning sensation in your back again. There wasn't a single moment where you didn't turn around every single second while walking to the showers or the cafeteria.
You were extremely paranoid.
But every time you did, there were always too many people in the halls to really make out someone who could be stalking you.
So you just kept on going about your day, minding your business.
Until you couldn't anymore.
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚
It was Friday night, which today should've been movie night, but it got canceled and now everyone was in a bad mood. It wasn't often that something nice like this happened and it was a good escape from the tiring everyday routine the inmates had in the prison. You got to watch cool movies, eat snacks from the commissary and chill with your friends.
Instead, you were now sitting in the tv room, just reading your book in a chair next to Morello, who had unfortunately forced you to come along.
"Come on, Y/N! I promise it'll be fun. You can bring your boring book, even though it is a TV room, meaning you go there to watch TV and not to…read. Usually. But I'm sure they'll make an exception!", she had said to you after finding you alone on your bunk, wrapped in your blanket. You had rolled your eyes at her but gotten up from your bunk nevertheless, admitting defeat.
You had actually been enjoying the silence in your dormitory from everyone being gone, but of course, that just had to be interrupted.
Now you were sitting there, amongst all those other people, just trying to read your book in peace. But, and honestly what else did you expect, there was the piercing set of eyes again, just watching your every move. You were actually so sick of it now. Why was this person looking at you the whole time? Why were you so interesting?
This time, you actually decided to turn around and not ignore them like you had done the other times.
You spotted her immediately. It was the woman who had frowned at you on your first day! The woman with the brown hair!
And now she was smirking at you. How was she not looking away or ashamed that you caught her?
Your eyes widened as you slowly scanned her. She was drop-dead-gorgeous. She had curves that were to die for, these stunning dark brown eyes…
You felt yourself blush and turned away. God, hadn't you promised yourself to not find anyone attractive here? Especially not people that could possibly be dangerous?
Well, you had just failed miserably and pathetically.
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚
Someone pulled a chair up in front of you, sitting on it backwards, using the back of the chair as an armrest.
You were looking down on the ground, burying your face in your book when a finger hooked itself under your chin, tilting it up.
The drop-dead-gorgeous woman was right in front of you, her eyes scanning your face, biting her lip.
She outstretched her hand to you.
"Ouija. Nice to meet you." Her eyes shone with something you couldn't quite decipher.
"Y/N", you introduced yourself, feeling shy in front of this beautiful woman, shaking her hand. She held onto it a little longer than normal, looking you directly in your eyes.
"That's a beautiful name."
She flashed you an amused smile, recognizing your anxiousness.
"Yo, there's no need to be shy, chica" (cutie/girl), Ouija said while moving in a little closer.
"Not for a pretty girl like you at least.", she said with a lowered voice.
She smiled at you once again and you felt your cheeks heat up.
"Thank you", you mumbled, not really knowing what else to say.
Ouija smirked.
"You're welcome, muñequita" (dolly)
Fuck.
"Anyhow, what you in for, mama?", she asked, slowly leaning back again as if she didn't just audibly make you gasp.
"Drug trafficking and distribution", you answered, avoiding her gaze.
"Yo, damn! So you a 'little miss drug dealer' then?" She laughed.
"Certainly. Right hand woman of my drug lord, thank you very much", you responded, bowing your head a little. She chuckled, shaking her head.
"Impressive, yo. I like a woman in power. It's hot."
You felt yourself blush again. God, this woman somehow had the ability to make you flustered very easily.
"So, what did you do?", you questioned.
"WIC Fraud. I killed three somebody's - nobodies -", she pointed to a tattoo that she had right next to her eye, three black teardrops, "and then I get popped for fucking fraud. You believe that shit?"
You shook your head, confused as to how they didn't find out about her killing all those people but charged her for the fraud. Maybe if you had committed another crime besides the drug thing and turned yourself in, you would be facing less time. You were suddenly deep in your thoughts, wondering about that, so that you didn't notice Ouija standing up beside you.
"All right, mama, I'mma let you get back to your book here. We'll see each other around", she said optimistically.
Ouija walked back to her seat, but not without winking at you and letting her hand brush against your arm.
You didn't get the chance to ask why she had been staring at you this whole time before really introducing herself to you, but right now, that matter seemed pretty unimportant to you. You felt starstruck from the interaction with the latina, just staring at the words in your book and not being able to focus at all. The conversation had been way too short and you already wanted to talk to her more.
But what you didn't know is that you wouldn't have to wait long until the two of you would speak again. Carmen had taken a liking to you and she was ready to explore what might develop between you two. At least she already knew that she was capable of making your cheeks go red within a matter of seconds.
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚
You were doing research in the library, or more like trying to find one of your favorite books, Harry Potter. You were trying to find some comfort in this cold place and what better way to do it than with your favorite literature? You wandered through the fiction aisle, scanning through the books.
There it was, on the highest shelf. But, of course, as expected, you were not tall enough to reach it. You felt so incredibly pathetic right now, there was no chair in sight to help you, no stool for you to stand on.
„Yo, need some help there?“, you heard someone ask. You turned around to the voice.
It was Ouija. She was leaning against one of the shelves, smirking at your attempts to stand on your tiptoes to grab the book, of course failing miserably.
„Yes, please“, you said, just a tad embarassed.
„Which book?“, she asked.
„Harry Potter“
She nodded, reaching up, taking it out without any strain.
„So, the goblet of fire“, she said, twisting the book in her hands.
„It was one of my favorite books growing up. I’m already done with all of the books I was allowed to bring in here so I thought I’d do a little nostalgia trip“
Your fingertips touched as she passed you the book.
„I liked it too as a little kid. But my favorite book was always the chamber of secrets“
„Girl – no offense – but are you serious?“
Ouija frowned, a playful smirk tugging at the corner of her lips.
„What do you mean?“, she questioned, crossing her arms in front of her face.
You smiled, shaking your head.
„Nah, I don’t want to destroy your favorite childhood book for you. I have a very strong opinion when it comes to Harry Potter.“
„No worries, yo, I can handle it. Give it to me“, Ouija said lowly, tilting her head. You bit your lip, rubbing your hands together, getting ready to go.
„Well, I think Ginny’s absolutely insufferable in that book, I mean sure, she was influenced by Voldemort but still, I think it’s not right that she played the „weak, needing to be saved“ girl in that book. It’s not exactly feminist. Also I think the book doesn’t really add to the series, it’s just kind of there as a „filler“ or an information dump. Also, the thing with the diary is just unrealistic. Why wouldn’t anyone notice that it’s in Ginny’s posession? It just doesn’t make sense.“
You grit your teeth in worry, hoping you didn’t go to far.
„I’m sorry, was that too far?“, you asked.
„Nah, I think you’re right actually. Yo, I might have to rethink my favorite childhood book“, Ouija laughed, rubbing her neck.
„I’d be happy to help. I know quite a lot about the series actually“, you explained proudly.
„I figured. That pretty face can convince me of anything, man, I’m sure“
You looked down, trying to hide the blush spreading on your cheeks.
„Don’t hide it“, Ouija said, tilting your chin up. You looked up into her beautiful dark brown eyes, getting lost in them.
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚
It was late in the afternoon, the sun was already setting and the inmates had a few hours left to catch some air outside before the prison would close its gates, making it time for lights out. You had put on your winter coat and beanie, ready to take a little stroll in the yard. Your hands were covered in thick gloves, protecting you from the harsh January wind
Today, you were just going to take a little stroll around the yard, not that anything else was really possible here. You wish you would have some kind of space to run, get rid of all the energy that you weren’t able to put to use properly.
You were just about to round the corner at the mailbox when you heard a noise.
You stopped in your tracks when you heard someone sniffle and sob.
Frowning, you started walking towards the sound and soon you were able to make out the person who they were coming from. They had brown curly hair - Oh shit! Ouija! You stopped yourself before you were going to run over to her and make sure she's okay.
You were unsure if you should approach her at such a sensitive time.
You wouldn't know how she was going to react, the two of you had known each other barely a hot second.
But you knew that if you were alone and crying in a prison and the person discovering you had good intentions, you would want to be comforted too. And that was good enough for you. You hoped you were making the right decision.
"Ouija, hey, what's wrong?", you asked worriedly, slowly kneeling down beside her.
Her head snapped up, her eyes widening when she realized it was you. She quickly wiped her tears away, trying to find her composure. You couldn’t help but admire her, she was even pretty when she cried, her lashes were stuck together, her cheeks were flushed… God, wrong moment!! Get it together Y/N...
"Oh shit. Hey, didn't hear you coming. Yo, how's it going?"
"I'm fine, but you don't seem to be. What's the matter?"
"Nah, I'm fine, nothing to worry about", she said quickly. You raised your eyebrows, not believing anything she said.
"What? I said I’m fine, man“, Ouija spat, putting up all her defenses.
"Look, I know we don’t really know each other, but I’m not gonna judge you for showing emotion or opening up. It’s human.“
Ouija huffed, shaking her head in disbelief.
"Fuck, fine. Shit, you're stubborn, girl. It's my son. He's in the hospital because of some gang activity in his block and…I'm not there for him, man. I'm in fucking prison. And I can't do anything about it."
You sighed. You knew what she was talking about. You felt the same. Being in prison made you feel so stuck, even though you had only been there for a few days. You weren’t there for your loved ones, the world around you kept turning and changing while you were locked away. Your friends had also seemingly already forgotten about you. Maybe they were all just glad you were gone.
"Honestly, I get it. I have a little sister, she just turned 5. She's growing up so fast and in a year, she'll already be in primary school. I'm missing out on her making her first friends there, I can't help her with her homework or comfort her when she has a bad day. It's torture. So yeah, I can relate. Nothing bad happened to her yet, fortunately, but you know the world out there. I can’t protect her from the harm she might experience out there."
The two of you were silent for a second, saying nothing.
"The thing is, you can't change anything about it. As much as it sucks, you gotta figure out how to deal with that shit. You gotta trust that your son knows you love him and that you being in here has nothing to do with him."
That flipped a switch in Ouija. She did love her son, a lot. She had just got to find a way to show it to him, especially right now. A small smile spread on her face as an idea popped up in her head.
She felt your hand touch her back, stroking it slowly.
Ouija turned to you, the woman who she had been obsessed with ever since she had entered the walls of this prison. The woman who she had frowned at when she made eye contact with her at her first day. The woman who frowned back. She knew that you knew that she had watched you the first few days upon your arrival. You were just so mesmerizing to her, she somehow felt drawn to you.
"Inmates! Back inside!", you heard a guard shout loudly. You sighed. The roughness of the CO's was still something you had to get used to.
"Yo, we should probably go before it gets serious or some shit. You never know if these fuckers are gonna pull out a gun or not", Ouija said, outstretching her hand to you, desperate to get you away from possible danger.
You nodded, letting her help you up.
As you were about to walk past the guard, you noticed that your shoe was untied. You stopped, reaching down to tie it, but the CO was not having it.
„INMATE! KEEP IT MOVING! I HAVEN’T GOT ALL FUCKING DAY, YOU UNDERSTAND??!“, he shouted aggressively, about to yank you up from the ground, when Ouija threw herself inbetween you two.
From your place on the ground, you didn’t hear what she said to the CO or what made him back off of the two of you. You only saw her enraged facial expression as she turned to help you up, once again. You were in a complete state of shock, this being the first time you were properly yelled at by a guard. You felt Ouija wrap an arm around your shoulder, guiding you back inside.
„Inmate Aziza, I would fucking throw you down to the SHU, but I’m fucking exhausted from today so I will let you off EASILY because I’m so nice with just a shot. For the both of you that is!“, he spat at the two of you as you walked back inside.
Ouija saw the broken look on your face and from that point, there was no way in hell that she was ever going to leave your side. She felt protective of you suddenly, she wanted to rip that guard’s head off, no, she wanted to choke him until his words got stuck in his fucking throat for ever talking to you in that way.
She wanted to shield you from any and all bad things in this place. She wanted you to herself, wanted no one fucking near you, except for her. Her hand grabbed your shoulder tighter.
She stood in front of you, so you were facing her. Butterflies erupted in her stomach as your gaze met hers. Your eyes were so beautiful. You were slightly looking up to her, as Ouija was a bit taller than you.
„Hey, yo, are you okay, mama? That guard was pretty rough on you“, she asked you, her voice soft as velvet. Tears threatened to spill from your eyes, but Ouija wasn’t letting that happen. She grabbed your chin, caressing your cheek with her thumb.
„Yo, no crying, pretty woman, we’ve already had enough of that today.“
„I love that movie“, you chuckled slightly, wiping your eyes with the sleeves of your shirt.
„Pretty Woman? White poor woman fucks rich white man and falls in love? Nah, that shit’s too predictable.“
„Exactly. One already knows how the movie ends, but I still like it“
Ouija scoffed, ruffling your hair. She leads you back to your dorm, glaring at Epps as the bald-headed woman was about to harass you again. Epps backed up with raised hands, whispering:
„I wasn’t even about to do anything...“
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚
You were casually walking to the showers, towel and toiletries in hand. It was 5am in the morning, so the line wasn't long.
You had gotten up early for the hot water, your bunkmate Epps complaining that you were making too much noise, disrupting her very important sleep. There were only 2 hours until she had to get up anyway. Epps luckily hadn’t bothered you too much the past few days, thanks to Ouija, who had given her death glares whenever the two of you had been hanging around each other, which had been quite often. You had spent most of your time with her, she had helped you settle into the prison and made you laugh almost all the time. You had been there for her during all the announcements she got from the hospital about her son and celebrated with her when the doctor told her that he was going to be okay.
You hadn’t really gotten acquainted with any of the other women at the prison, as every time you tried to talk to one of them, you felt Ouija’s glare on the both of you or you got pulled away from the other person because she suddenly „needed to talk to you very urgently“. Of course you knew that she was jealous somehow, even though she had no reason to be. One of the times when she had dragged you away, the two of you had gone to the chapel. Ouija hadn’t said anything as she had taken your hand and pulled you along with her.
She had lifted you onto the stage, where performances or speeches were given, but kept standing on the ground herself. She still stayed silent as she locked eyes with you and slowly ran one of her hands up your thigh. She leaned in a little bit when her hand reached the waistband of your pants, her eyes on your lips. You could basically feel the electricity sizzling between the two of you. It was like the two of you were always meant to end up so close to each other, like this. Your foreheads were already touching, your lips barely inches away from each other, when the door to the chapel slammed shut and the both of you immediately flew off of each other. Pidge was calling for Ouija, telling her that Maria was calling a meeting. Ouija, frustrated, promising you she would be back for you, „continuing where you left of“. And now you were here.
You stepped into one of the shower cabinets, turning on the shower head.
You sighed as the warm water washed over your body, immediately making you sleepy again. You hadn’t slept really well with that racist woman Epps beneath you. You never knew what she might do and you always had to sleep with one eye open. It was exhausting and definitely took a strain on your body.
"Mornin', muñequita."
You turned around to the voice, looking directly into Ouija's eyes. She looked a little sleepy, but her half-closed eyes were still roaming your body, drinking in your frame. With just a look, she was able to to make you sweat, blush, avoid her gaze… it was nerve-wracking. With a towel wrapped around your body, you stepped outside of the shower and towards the fully dressed Ouija.
"Hey there“, you answered, yawning.
"How you doing, mama?"
"I'm good, a little tired still." She nodded understandingly.
"Glad my pretty girl is doing well", she smiled, leaning against the wall.
You blushed a little and looked to your feet, trying to hide your reddened cheeks.
"Yo, come over here, mama", she beckoned.
You looked left and right to check if anyone was there who could possibly see you before you moved out of the shower cabin and over to where Ouija was standing.
As soon as you were standing in front of her Ouija grabbed your shoulders and pulled you close, wrapping her arms around your lower torso. She pressed a kiss to your forehead, allowing you to rest your head on her chest.
„Y/N?“
„Yeah?“
„I wanted to say thanks for the time you found me..you know, crying, and comforted me and shit. I didn’t deserve that and I’m still a shit mom, but I talked to my son on the phone and...he’s coming to visitation next week“
You squealed in excitement, jumping up a little bit, so excited for Ouija.
„Ouija, that’s great! I’m so happy for you!“
You wrapped your arms around her neck , embracing her in a hug.
Ouija grabbed you by your hips and switched positions so that now you were pressed against the wall. Both of her hands were placed next to your head while yours were busy holding up that towel of yours.
„You’re so cute when you’re happy, you know that?“, Ouija asked, biting her bottom lip. She leaned in closer, taking your face inbetween her hands. Your eyes closed in anticipation, ready to finally connect with her, to finally feel the full extent of the electricity between you too. She leaned in, leaned in, you started feeling dizzy of her scent, of her presence...
BANG! The metal door to the showers slammed shut, loud voices coming from the doorway. Ouija immediately let go of you, distancing herself, and as some of the other inmates walked past you and entered the showers, you tried to act as nothing had happened before. You exchanged a frustrated glance with her, were you ever going to be able to kiss?
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚
It was your bunkmate Epps' birthday and she made like this whole deal out of it. Almost everyone in this prison was invited, including you and Ouija and almost every single lesbian which was weird, since Epps was definitely homophobic.
But she and her friends did know how to throw a party, you had to leave her that. There was a snack bar with drinks, a dance floor and colorful garlands reading "happy birthday".
You had just entered the overfilled room, completely overwhelmed, not knowing what to do or where to stand or where to sit. You were looking around for Ouija, finding her in a corner of the room, next to Pidge and Zirconia.
She was staring down everyone in the room, a grumpy expression on her face. You know how frustrated she had been the past few days, you were about to kiss two times, but always had been interrupted by one of the other inmates. Privacy was basically non-existent in prison and by now, the two of you were so desperate to kiss, you almost felt like two pathetic lesbian teenage girls.
You were walking towards her, pushing through the crowd, and as you approached them, Zirconia noticed you, her face lighting up.
"Y/N! Hi!", she exclaimed happily.
Ouija's head immediately snapped in your direction and her entire demeanor changed. Her grumpy face disappeared, her eyes lit up and a smile spread across her lips.
"Well, yo, look who showed up!", she said, genuinely happy to see you.
You smiled at her and Pidge.
You looked around for a chair to pull up next to the group, but of course, every single one was taken. This did not go unnoticed by Ouija and she certainly did not seem too unhappy about this fact as her smirk widened.
"Come, muñeca, you can sit here", she said, pointing to her man spread legs. Damn, you thought, really really wanting to, but not being sure if it might be risky. You looked around to see if anyone was looking except for Zirconia and Pidge, but everyone was too focused on themselves to even slightly care about the two of you. And even so, you didn’t care.
You lowered yourself onto her lap and immediately felt her arms tightly wrap around your torso.
„Good girl, put those pretty thighs on me“, she whispered in your ear, her hand stroking your leg softly. Your eyes widened, the familiar blush spreading on your cheeks. „Mi amor, mio todo mio“, (my love, mine all mine) she mumbled, placing a kiss on your shoulder.
The evening progressed without anyone even looking at you. You sat on Ouija’s lap the entire time, wondering how it wasn’t taking a strain on her legs, conversing with her, Zirconia and Pidge. You did not once go to the buffet because you were so immersed in the conversation you were having with them but nevertheless, you were thirsty.
„I’ll just get something to drink really quick, do you want anything?“, you said to Ouija, hopping off of her lap.
„Nah, I’m good, thanks though“
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚
You were standing at the bar, deciding what drink you were going to get, not that there were a lot of options, this was prison after all. Possibilities weren’t exactly endless.
„Hi there“, a voice greeted you, coming out of nowhere.
You jumped, letting out a little shriek.
„Oh I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you“, the woman next to you said worriedly, but you only laughed.
„It’s fine, I get scared easily.“
„You’re new here right?“, she asked, tilting her head in curiosity.
„Yeah, I arrived here about two weeks ago, so my stay hasn’t exactly been long“
„Ah, so a newbie. That’s why I haven’t seen you around.“
You nodded, conversing in a little small talk with her. You already felt Ouija staring at you, knowing it was because of her protective and posessive nature, but you also wanted friends in here. You needed other people that you could rely on.
The woman, who turned out to be called Carla was telling you funny stories about other prisons she had been at and interactions she had with other inmates there and here at Litchfield.
You laughed loudly, finding her absolutely hilarious. While you and the woman were joking around, Ouija was boiling with anger and jealousy. She tried to keep her cool, „take a fucking chill pill“, like Zirconia had advised her. But it was really hard when she hadn’t even kissed you yet, didn’t even get to call you hers yet. Maybe the possibility of somebody else still being able to snatch you away was giving her the nerves. Maybe she would be more relaxed if she knew you were really hers.
Maybe. But right now, she just wanted to get you the fuck away from that other woman.
As you kept talking with Carla, you felt her put her hand on your waist.
„Um…“, you mumbled, looking over to Ouija. That was Carmen Aziza’s last straw. Nobody would touch her girl, not like that.
She stormed over to where you were standing and pushed the other woman off of you and to the ground where she landed with a loud bang. She stood over the woman, placing her thick boot onto her chest, compromising her airways.
„Touch her again and yo“, she laughed bitterly, „I’ll fuck you up“.
Before you could properly register what was happening, you felt yourself being grabbed by the wrist and pulled away. You didn’t know where you were going, as you were still finding your way around the prison, when you reached the door to the library. It was completely silent, the only sound being you getting pushed against one of the shelves.
Ouija stood in front of you, placing one of her hands beside your head. She used the other one to harshly grab your chin, lifting it up so you were looking at her. Her facial expression was one of anger, jealousy and displeasement.
„I don’t know who that other woman thinks she is, but she better know that you’re mine. Ever since you stepped into the walls of this prison, shit, I knew I had to have you. You're mine, amorcita. You're all mine and yo, guess what? I ain't about fucking sharing. I can’t hide how I feel about you anymore, munequita. Not when 1000 other bitches are this close to you every day. I love you.“
Ouija’s face was full of worry, anticipation of what you thought of her confession, if you felt the same.
„I’m yours“, you said, breathless, and that was all it took for Ouija to smash her lips against you and press you further into the wooden shelves. Her scent intoxicated you, all you saw, smelled, heard, touched was her. She was your whole world and you were hers. Her warm body was pressing into yours, her hands were roaming your body, diving underneath your shirt. Finally, you could do what you waited so long for. Her hands were in your hair, her tongue was dancing with yours. You forgot that you were in prison, you forgot about the world around you.
All there was, was you and her. Your love, yours all yours.
#carmen aziza oitnb#orange is the new black#oitnb imagine#ouija aziza x reader#carmen aziza x fem reader#carmen aziza x reader#carmen ouija aziza x reader#carmen ouija aziza#carol denning x reader#oitnb ouija#oitnb x reader#orange is the new black x fem reader#lesbian#request#oitnb#carmen ouija aziza x fem reader#alex vause x reader#oitnb zirconia#oitnb pidge#oitnb irene cabrera#oitnb brandy epps
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it’s no wonder Baekhyun's kfans are this deranged. he feeds into their delusions and he’s not even subtle about it. you get the fans you deserve. Him and Jungkook are the same. They sell parasocial relationships hard and it's gonna bite them in their ass one day. Weird cause these two have the talent in both singing and dancing, can't y'all just sell music instead.
I saw this comment under a pannchao post and most kpop fans and army agree to it. This is why I don't feel anything when JK is dragged through mud for some dating rumors. He's the one who fuels gf×bf dynamics with his fans, he's the one who deny having partner and only having army as his gf, he's the one who goes overboard with fanservice while other idols nor bts members does the same even if they do the same job as him, so obviously he's gonna get the fruit of it 🤷♀️ Do he think he can fool the f out of his fans and then have a peaceful dating life ? Either you draw clear borders with fans or you don't date.. as simple as that. It's even funnier when whole world can see what's happening while there's shippers who thinks he's dating his bandmate😭 even delulu than y/ns. I don't think anyone with self respect can be in a commited relationship with JK when all he does is sex chatting with his fans in lives and satisfy their Para social bf needs. And i think Jimin has more than enough self respect to be with a person like him.
I nearly agreed with you until you name dropped Jungkook.
I agree in part because I hate the fact these straight idols hide their Relationships when they have the privilege of dating openly without being persecuted unlike queer couples.
But leave Jungkook out of this please.
cos this same Jungkook is the one who nearly threw a fist when Armies would call him baby. Same person who squares up with his fans when they tell him they don't like content he puts out on live. He just shrugs and says well I like it.
Same Jungkook who got a tattoo and keeps adding to it knowing his fans hate it, not only that he also got pierced against their will and when he was told they hated long hair he went ahead and grew it out.
While you're out here claiming he panders to his fans there are several ex Jungkook stans who hate him because they claim he is a shitty idol who only does what he likes and doesn't care what his fans like.
Same person who was told by his members he had to post for each members birthdays because the fans were not happy he wasn't yet he didn't post any way.
Same person who's life motto is that he'd rather be dead than cool.
How do you reconcile these two things???
Same person who went to Itaewon during lockdown and wouldn't apologize because "IT WAS HIS PERSONAL LIFE" had it not been the fact others had died from covid and the sensitive nature of the issue he wouldn't have apologized at all.
He can't be tagged a carefree rebellious nonconformist idol while also seen as a fan-ass-kisser at the same time. Yall would have to choose a narrative and stick with it.
Personally I believe him when he says anything.
If he doesn't have a girlfriend it's because HE DON'T HAVE A GIRLFRIEND. yall jx not willing to stomach the fact. You are just like Tuktukkers istg.
Out of all BTS the one person who wouldn't give a flying fuck fans reaction when he's in a relationship IS JUNGKOOK. YALL WILL NOT MAKE HIM APOLOGIZE FOR LIKING WHAT OR WHO HE LIKES.
Even in our ship narratives we have this running theory that dudes always on the edge of the glass ceiling ready to shatter it to pieces but for consideration of Jimin. Even with that, every now and then he outs the dude.
He could have covered his bite marks or lied about it being an insect bite or pimle but dude just said naa that was Jimin. He be in my neck most times.
So we jokers see Jungkook waaaay differently from how yall see him. He is a complex living being not a one dimensional creature like you paint him out to be.
Fan service is part of Kpop. ALL IDOLS ENGAGE IN FAN SERVICE TO VARYING DEGREES. he's not the devil for doing fan service and while you think he doesn't have a sense of boundaries with it HE DOES. ITS JUST NOT THE BOUNDARIES YOU WISH HE HAD. SAY THAT AND GO.
ALL IDOLS TREAT THEIR FANS AS THEIR GFS AND BFS. ITS THE MONEY BLUE PRINT. ITS THEIR MARKETING STRATEGY.
AND YES, SINCE PORTRAYING THEMSELVES AS A AVAILABLE AND DOTTING ON FANS IS HOW THEY KEEP THE LOYALTY OF THEIR FANS THEY WOULD OBVIOUSLY LIE ABOUT THEIR DATING LIFE. I WOULD TOO IF I WERE AN IDOL.
But that doesn't mean whenever they say they are single its a lie💀💀💀💀💀💀
They are not always in a relationship.
That doesn't also mean they are all afraid to admit the truth about their relationship status. It depends on their age, how long they've been an idol and the level of success they've attained. A new idol on the scene obviously would be committing career suicide while a veteran couldn't give a fuck.
So when you talk of young Kook starting out his career I'd understand. He was subject to the control of his company and had to deny his relationships because at that stage he'd be risking much. But this Jungkook don't care I promise you. HE DON'T CARE BOUT YALLS FEELINGS ESPECIALLY AS HIS FANS ARE GROWING WITH HIM AND ARE AT THE SAME AGE AS HIM.
Also, some idols JUST don't CARE and would readily admit it if the person they are with is the one AND THEY LOVE THEM. you seem to forget that part.
It makes no sense to claim a partner and risk your whole career for a fling or someone you don't like like that can you be for real for once in your life?
Wait- ever think about that?
Normal people do this too. What's the expression, don't let your boyfriend stop you from finding your husband or wife 🤭
We deny relationships all the time if we aren't serious about the people we are with. Or if we aren't sure where we stand with the person.
It doesn't make us evil and idols are just like us. Not every single person they messing around with is WORTH CLAIMING at all.
Which is what I've been saying for years, that if an idol is denying a relationship its usually because that relationship, fling or whatever isn't worth them claiming or risking their careers for.
If they are with someone they truly loved and revered denying them would be the last and the hardest thing they'll do and eventually theyll stop apologing for it, they grow out of their concerns for their careers, become mature and own up to it.
I keep telling my ladies, if a man keeps hiding you, if a man refuses to post you on his socials HE DOESN'T LIKE YOU LIKE THAT AND YOU'RE PROBABLY A SIDE PIECE TO HIS SIDE PIECE. DROP THE DUSTIE, LOVE YOURSELVES AND BREAK UP WITH HIM PRONTO.
Yall are mad these idols aren't claiming the imaginary girlfriends you want them to have.
Yall mad they aren't claiming the insignificant placeholders in their beds 🤣
Like leave them alone.
If the coochie is worth fighting for someone like Jungkook WILL NOT HESITATE TO PUT UP A FIGHT. IVE SEEN HIM RISK A LOT MORE FOR A MAN YALL CLAIM IS HIS FATHER- OR WAS IT MOTHER😵
SURELY HE SHOULD HAVE NO QUALMS FIGHTING FOR YALLS QUEENS IF HE'S WITH EM🤭
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A Muggle AU Harrymort fic where Voldemort is a killer (he is in his late 40s/early 50s when the fic happens. I had to push his year of birth forward by 4 decades but if you want me to write Old Man Muggle Voldemort fucking Harry I AM NOT AFRAID BRING IT ON) who killed Harry's parents and 20 years later 21-year-old Harry visits him in jail and he ends up becoming obsessed with her.
Some background info for the scenes below:
1st Scene - First meeting, short sentences.
2nd scene: This is set in the jail when Harry visits Voldemort and gifts him Shakespeare’s Plays Hardcover Book for his birthday. This capybara is absolutely using this fic as an excuse to extend my knowledge on English and classic literature.
3rd scene: At this point, Voldemort has kidnapped Harry and is driving her to the Riddle Manor from London to Yorkshire and there is Forced Marriage, they are married already in this scene.
4th scene: They stop at a petrol station and Harry has a plan to get free. Bcs tumblr is being a little bastard and not letting me paste it, I'll make a post exactly for it. FUCK YOU, TUMBLR.
1st Scene (First Meeting)
He did not look like a killer. Except… Except the eyes. Those were a killer’s eyes.
2nd Scene (Jail Visit)
“What’s your favourite?” asked Voldemort, pulling Harry out of her thoughts. “What?” asked Harry, blinking. “Shakespeare,” he replied calmly. “What’s your favourite play of his?” Harry shrugged. “They were all boring to me, really.” Voldemort chuckled. His long, slender fingers touched the cover of the book, in the exact same spot where Harry's fingers had been holding it a few minutes ago. A slow, fond caress. His cold gaze never strayed from hers.
[Voldemort is wishing his fingers were caressing Harry’s skin rather than the leather cover of the book.]
“I think you’d like A Midsummer Night’s Dream,” said Voldemort, continuing to brush the cover of the thick book. It was making Harry uneasy. His gaze was burning into her. “Because it isn't a tragedy, unlike so many of his works. Some are so dark and morbid, aren't they? And you don’t like tragedies, Harry.”
“There is a scene, where Lysander, who has forgotten Hernia because of a flower juice poured over his eyes, sees her once again, and falls in love with her all over again.” said Voldemort, looking at Harry.
Harry wondered how a man so old could be so beautiful.
3rd Scene (Roadtrip)
It was a dark Bentley Arnage Uncle Vernon would be jealous of. Harry couldn’t truly appreciate it with her right hand handcuffed to the door handle. Harry also couldn’t appreciate the casettes it was playing, either, because she wanted to chuck herself out of the window because it was playing Sweet Caroline. What was worse... Voldemort was singing over it. And the bloody bastard was a bloody good singer. “Sweet Caroline,” sang Voldemort, his silken voice somehow better than Neil Diamond’s, and Harry truly hated thinking it. “Good times never seemed so good...” Voldemort was jolly, smiling broadly, like a man from the 50s celebrating marrying the prettiest girl in town. It was unnerving, chilling the blood in her veins. “Oh, come on, Harry,” said Voldemort, glancing Harry's way with a slightly offended expression when he saw she was glaring at him instead of joining him in singing. “You know this one.” Clenching her jaw, Harry was starting to truly, consciously consider committing first degree murder.
4th Scene (Petrol Station)
Voldemort parked the Bentley beside the petrol pump. He shut off the car engine, pulled out the car key and unbuckled his seatbelt. “Stay here, my dear.” he said, leaning over to place a quick, but nevertheless warm kiss on Harry’s left cheek. By the time Harry registered what happened, Voldemort was opening the doors, closing them shut. The heat of his lips lingered on her cheek, molten hot like venom. Harry leaned her head over the seat, her heart racing. She watched Voldemort move to the petrol container on the left side of the car. It was better not to do anything. He’ll have to go in and pay for the petrol. That’s when Harry will start digging for the key of the handcuffs. Harry watched Voldemort, and he must have noticed it, because he turned his gaze toward her, giving her an ardent, covetous look, the sharpness of his eyes softening, his lips pulling into a charming smile. Harry’s heart performed a sommersault. Flinching, she turned back around, facing forward. Her face felt hot, and there was a burning heat low in her belly. She heard the hum of the petrol as the petrol pump turned on, pouring petrol into the petrol tank of the car. For a while, Harry focused on that, trying to forget the soft lines of Voldemort’s face. Voldemort opened the doors, making Harry jump. “Are you hungry?” he asked her. “No,” replied Harry dully, staring at the shop because she didn’t want to look at Voldemort in that moment. It was the truth. Harry wasn’t having much of an appetite at all. “Do you need to use the bathroom?” “Um,” said Harry awkwardly, because she was feeling her bladder was getting full. “Yeah. Yeah, I do.” Voldemort hummed. “After I pay.” he said, then closed the doors gently. To think such gentle movements and gallant behaviour could shift to monstrous within a blink. Harry watched Voldemort walk into the petrol station store. When the doors closed behind him, Harry started reaching her free left hand toward the storage compartment, but then she saw Voldemort pull out a credit card and swipe it across the card-reader. Fuck. The next second, Harry retracted her hand back to her lap, and the second after that, Voldemort exited the petrol station carrying a plastic bag. Harry’s shoulders slumped in disappointment. Voldemort got back in the car.
“I brought you pads,” he said, much to Harry’s horror, placing the bag in the backseat. He turned on the car and drove to the right, in one of the many empty parking spots, near the bathroom sign. Then, he leaned down and unbuckled Harry’s seatbelt. Harry watched where the key — Fucking hell! Voldemort pulled out the small key of the cuffs from his back pocket, placed it into the lock, and unlocked the cuff. Harry got her right hand away from the open cuff as quickly as she could.
Voldemort got out of the car and opened the doors for Harry, offering her his hand. Harry only put her hand in his because she knew he’d be displeased if she didn’t. His hand was big and surprisingly warm. His long fingers wrapped around her palm, holding her hand tightly, and he helped Harry out of the car, then closed the doors. It was rather warm outside in the summer weather, but nothing serious. They walked, hand-in-hand, to the bathroom section. There wasn't anyone in the women's section. Uncaring, Voldemort stepped in, letting go of Harry’s hand at last and letting her go into the cubicle. Just to be safe — or have an illusion of safety and privacy — Harry locked the doors. She heard Voldemort laugh amusedly, a low sound. Harry quickly did her business, glaring all the while at the doors, flushing red at the awareness Voldemort was on the other side of the doors, listening... Harry couldn’t believe how bad her luck was. The only options she had were to make a run for it now (impossible, she’d need to turn invisible) or steal the keys which were in Voldemort’s back pocket. Harry wanted to smash her head against the wall. Rather death than whatever awaited her with that psychopathic, remorseless murderer. She had to think, and do it fast. Hang on... Pads. “Harry,” said Voldemort coldly, voice darker; it sent chills down her spine, goosebumps along her flesh. “If you’re stalling —” “Um,” said Harry in the most genuine, awkward tone possible.
“I got my period.” A moment of silence. Harry could feel Voldemort’s eyes through the door, and she wondered if he could hear the lie in her voice. “I see.” said Voldemort. Harry smiled at her genius plan. Now Voldemort will have to go back to the car for the pads and Harry can run for it. “Open the doors. I brought one with me.” What kind of creep are you?! Harry thought to scream, but choked it down by a growl. It must have come out as pained (it was pained, but for an entirely different reason, such as this bastard being too thorough!) because she heard Voldemort’s footsteps on the tile. “I won’t enter.” he said, while Harry’s heart raced along with her mind. “I’ll pass it to you.” The plan to run was ruined. Harry doubted she’d get a chance to steal the keys anytime soon before they reached a motel before nightfall, before he... Harry’s breaths quickened, coming out in wheezing, rattling breaths. God. God. God. Why her? She never should have gone there. She never should have stepped foot in that prison. She never should have picked up the phone on the other side of the glass. She never should have bought him that fucking book for his fucking birthday as some fucking kindness. He deserved to rot in there, he deserved to die in there, he was a monster in human form. But Voldemort broke out because of her! Because he wanted her! Because... what had she even done that... What made him... A sniffle broke through Harry’s tumbling thoughts of despair; it belonged to Harry. It was Harry. Harry was sniffling. On the verge of crying. “Harry.” It was his voice. Silken and soft. “I won’t do anything until tonight, as I promised you. Now open the door.” Miserable, Harry got up from the toilet, uncaring for her lack of underwear. Right as she reached for the lock, an epiphany swept over her. Voldemort wanted Harry. It was so simple that Harry felt like laughing. Voldemort wanted Harry. Harry's breaths calmed as sudden realisation swept over her. Any sign of tears vanished. Harry would get those keys even if she had to suck Voldemort off in this bathroom cubicle. Determination burned inside of Harry. Then, she opened the doors, and when Voldemort's hand entered through the gap, holding the pad, Harry grasped his wrist instead, and pulled.
Continuation of 4th scene cus tumblr is a little bitch - This is where Explicit Content is.
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💐 Welcome to my fandoms house 💐
Finaly you made it here and i'm so happy because you decided to follow me and i hope you enjoy your stay🐰✨
Everybody is welcome here except Homophobes, racists, Pedophiles, Proshippers, Gacha heaters, and all the nasty people in general
So in this blog i make a lot of things here like memes, arts,edits, ect, sometimes they look good, sometimes they look cringe🙂🙂
Also i'm in love with James. He is the one who will be more present in this blog, sorry not sorry!!
And also these things here bellow👇🏻👇🏻:
I can do:
Tweening/animation
Drawing arts(even with bases or without them)
SFW (make characters kissing,marking echothers, moaning...)
Drawing simple backgrounds
Art requests
Art commissions
Things i can't do:
Gacha heat
Gacha cringe
Drawing diffecult backgrounds(like forests/cities/beaches, i really need Pinterest so bad😭)
Drawing animals(don't worry I am learning now)
Animate eyes
NSFW (18+)
Letting my oc's naked
🚫 But this blog is also contains swears, yeah a very ✨MOROCCAN✨ swearing, yep i like swearing a lot (But not to this degree), so if you have nothing nice to say here just leave my blog or block me IDFC 🚫
✏️~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~✏️
🎧°•My bio and information•°🖤:
🌺Name: Jessy the bunny or Jess in short🎧
🎧real name: N/A🌺
🎧age: 16 yo🌺
🎧birthday: December 1st🌺
🎧nationality: Moroccan🇲🇦🌺
🎧Zodiac: Sagittarius♐🌺
🎧Pronons:She/her/they/them🌺
🎧Gender: female🌺
🎧MBTI: INTP🌺
🎧sex: asexual💜🤍🩶🖤🌺
🎧hobbies: drawing/cooking/reading books and manhwas(especially the yaoi/yuri ones👀💦)/doing Gacha videos and art/writing stories🌺
🎧favorite shows: Thomas and friends, happy tree friends, dragon ball, smurfs, south park, lazy town,Hazbin hotel...🌺
🎧fears: dark, insects, social phobia, bullying (yeah i'm weak),being ignored🌺
🎧likes: Chocalate, cookies, sleeping, Science and Biology, English, watching videos or make them, anything sweet🌺
🎧dislikes: butter(i'm allergic),Maths and physics, Injustice and insult, school(yeah i hate school soooooooo much because of those fucking classmates), Sports, thomas and friends AEG,making friends irl because they are treacherous🌺
🎧features: Nervous, introverted, depressed, funny, shy, autistic🌺
🎧I'm a young artist, plz don't judge me!!!🌺
🎧my DMs are always open, but mostly for commissions🌺
🎧I'm also calling someone who's older than me by mr or miss as a respect for them🌺
✏️°•Extra Information and rules•°✏️:
💚I'm a little bad at English, so you may find some spelling and grammatical errors, so I sometimes use a translator
🖤Don't ask me hateful or disgusting questions, otherwise I will block you
💚I swear a lot, but it's not because I'm rude or something, it's because I'm nervous and I don't control myself, but that doesn't mean I'm mad or upset with you, so don't get me wrong
🖤I don't interact with many people, including: kids, proshippers, pedos, gacha heaters...
💚Don't spam my inbox, if you ask me very much or asking me something multiple times, I'll ignore it and I'll never answer it!
🖤don't steal/repost/copy/use my art without my permission, if you want to use my art as a pfp, ect, ask me first and credit me
💚I have Instagram, Youtube, Tiktok, Pinterest, whatsapp channel,Facebook and discord, so if you saw my art in another social, tell me immediately I will deal with it
🖤I still have some difficulties in drawing, so sometimes I have to use drawing bases to practice, so don't attack me please!
💚Although I like to draw cute things, on the other hand, this blog contains mature content, such as blood, cursing, and some chaotic thirst so be careful.
⚠️°•TW•°⚠️:
Swears
Gore/blood
Sexual themes
Violence
Bad grammar
Cringe behaviors
SFW (safe for work)
Vent
✏️~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~✏️
🤍°•FAQs•°💛:
🌟Q:what's your favorite fandom?
A: thomas and friends and this blog will be based with it thank you very much✨✨
_
🌟Q: what's your favorite characters from your favorite fandom?
A: James, Duck, Thomas, Gordon, Percy, Oliver and Toad, Donald and Douglas, Marion, Skiff
_
🌟Q: As for the engines, in their human form, can they fuck or reproduce?
A: Unfortunately, they can fuck whatever or whenever they want but they can't reproduce or have kids because they don't have biological hormones or DNA or whatever it's called like a normal human being
_
🌟Q: what are the ages in your Au?
A: 3 years until 60 years, There are those who are older than this, but I limit myself to these ages because I want them to be limited
_
🌟Q: what are your self insert's sexualities?
A: Every self insert into a random fandom has its own sexuality, for example my versions, I can't let all my versions being Asexual, bc if I let them it'll be boring so I tried to diversify their sexualities, for example Soft Jessy is lesbian, Bad Jessy is trans, Galaxy is pan, ect...
But fo the other fandoms I usuelly let them bi or pan or even straight to make sure that everyone has its lover/soulmate/partner/boyfriend/girlfriend...
_
🌟Q: how did you make your Oc's and are they real or imagined?
A: I made them randomly so that I don't feel like I'm filming the videos alone and that they aren't real people, I made them according to their personality, their life, the story of their past, etc.
_
🌟Q: who are your besties?
A: 🎧@miasonyson🎧
💞@lovable-chica💞
💎@asktoyokoakemi💎
💜@viktuurishipper96💜
🎀@bertramtheoldwarrior🎀
🌠@blueskygirl22🌠
🎩 @jammyjams1910🎩
💖@just-an-emily-existing💖
💟@prometheus2007💟
_
🌟Q: are you doing art requests?
A: yes I do them,like if someone asks me to draw anything about TTTE Au or other fandoms Aus, But for their Oc's they just have to wait until June because it's summer and i will be active anytime
_
🌟Q: Are you gonna do art commissions?
A: Yes, I do them and I really want to, because I need some money to help my parents, so now I am waiting for someone to ask me
_
🌟Q: How tall are the engines?
A: Well, in terms of height, the shortest is Toad and Percy is the second shortest engine and he's almost 5’8ft,and the tallest engine is Gordon, The flying scottsman, Spencer and Diesel 10.Their hight is 7’11ft because they're big and tender engines
_
🌟Q: Does Lady's magical dust have any benefit or any influence on the rest of the engines?
A: Yes, it definitely has a benefit for the engines. Thanks to it, it can save them from becoming victims of scrap, or if something physically harms them in their human form, it comes and treats them because ordinary doctors cannot treat human engines
✏️~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~✏️
🎀°•some basics of my Au•°🎀:
🌟some of my oc's transform into their true forms for many special reasons, for example demons, wolves, rabbits, etc., but the duration of this transformation is specific
🌟These reasons in particular may be either psychological, such as sadness, shame, and the desire to feel lonely and calm, or physical reasons
🌟The characters are distinguished from each other by their superpowers and magic, which makes them 100% different from ordinary humans
🌟Each one of us has his own personality, and this is the result of their personalities and feelings being different
🌟Characters can fuse and create new characters, but only if three basic conditions are met: If the two characters have a relationship of love, brotherhood, or strong friendship, If these conditions are not met, they will not be able to fuse
🌟ech character has a rival with another character, The reasons are as follows: Either he had a bad past, or that person was famous and forgot about his friend, and so on
🌟as for the humanized engines, their blood is a bit darker than a normal human being, and also if they lost anything or got cut like if they lost their arm or their leg or anything, don't worry, Lady is here for help
🌟and also they can eat, drink, wash their teeth,taking shower, and almost anything about humans, but the only thing that they don't do in their human form is breeding and reproduction, and the engines in their human form become even more stronger so they can done their jobs very fast and easely.
✏️~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~✏️
💗🌟Thank you so much for your time and reading this and i hope you enjoy your stay here again ^^🌟💗
✍🏻°•My Au's headcanons+Refs+ Stories•°🩷:
❇️°•Art commisions are open•°❇️
🌟°•Original oc's•°🌟
🚂°•Original engines•°🚂
🌹°•other social medias•°🎧
💞°•Official ships•°💞
♡__________________________♡
💫°•Some fandoms i drew•°💫
🖤°•Douglas and Oliver headcanons•°💚
🌈°•original face expressions+color pallet chart•°✨
💐°•Self inserts•°💐
☁°•some random ttte headconons•°🎀
♡__________________________♡
🚂°•The main 12 steam team•°🚂
📖°•ttte fanlore/AUs/fanfics/crossovers/series•°📖
💚°•the emo controller•°🖤
🖤°•Casual emo controller•°💚
🚂°•the narrow gauge engines•°☁
💙°•the Gresley family•°☁
🚂°•the diesels•°⛽
🪄°•Magical/ghost engines•°👻
🤍°•Other ttte characters•°🤍
✍🏻°•About my humanisation•°✍🏻
♡__________________________♡
✏️°•Some simple tutorials•°🖌
💙°•Original stories/lore•°📖
😌°•This could be useful•°😌
🎧°•Artist profile•°💚
🌠°•Unrelated ttte stuff•°🌠
#pinned post#original oc's#social media#💞Official ships��#fypシ#viral#thomas and friends#thomas the tank engine#artists on tumblr#gacha club#gacha life#💫Some fandoms i drew💫#Au#Oc's#fandom#💐self inserts💐#Ttte#historical fiction#Sodor Magical World#jessy the bunny 🐰🌺#ttte emo controller 💚🖤#📖ttte fanlore/AUs/fanfics/crossovers/series📖#💙Original stories/lore📖#✏️some simple tutorials🖌#🎧artist profile💚#🌠unrelated ttte stuff🌠#☁some random ttte headconons🎀#Original engines#Art commisions#💖let this creavity live💖
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Perfect victim Sand
(Except he’s not)
Sand is a quite interesting case to study. There are a lot of things to love about him and trust me I do. But. He is the closest thing we have in this show to the perfect victim idea. I mean, even Force jokes about it (god I love this man).
The thing is, I have a strong feeling that huge part of the fandom literally adopted him. Like you know, compensating him absent mommy and daddy. His mother is great woman, she’s loving and caring, but she is far from an actual parental figure - @emotionallychargedtowel made a great analysis on that topic and how it clearly influenced Sand.
Maybe that’s something about Sand being genuinely loving and caring character himself. Maybe it’s because we spend 5 episodes with him being absolutely adequate and not minding others business and by the moment of episode 6 the idea of Sand was already formed. Maybe it’s about Ray pulling Sand through a lot of shit. Maybe it’s something about First’s babygirl vibes, amazing microexpressions and his big boba eyes that easily penetrates the soul. Maybe it’s all the above and more.
But Sand gets the most I’ll protect him by all cost vibes (I get it, I want to protect him too, he’s my sad stupid baby, how can I not). And while it’s understandable to some degree, it doesn’t mean Sand is a victim in every situation he himself, series or fandom try to apply on him.
And yes, it’s specifically about Sand and Top beef. While we don’t know the full story yet, we know the basis: Sand had a lover, this lover cheated on him with Top. Right? Except that in Sand’s mind this story looks a bit different.
Not once, but twice Sand claims that Top “stole his lover”. And I’m sorry to bring it to you, my precious sad baby with big beautiful eyes, but your lover is a human being. They’re not a car, or watch, or a cow. They are a person. And as a person they make decisions.
Unless we’ll find out that Top literally put a bag on their head and dragged them away into his basement, Top didn’t stole anyone. This person cheated on you. It sucks, I get it (Mew probably gets it even better than me). It hurts a lot. It’s absolutely not Sand’s fault. But it’s not Top’s fault either.
Yes, hitting on someone’s lover is a douche move (if Top knew about Sand and didn’t care and I wouldn’t surprised but we don’t know for sure). Yes, Top is an arrogant jerk who behaves like a toxic bitch with anyone except for Mew. Yes, in that hospital scene I kind of wanted to punch him in his hot smug face.
But Sand’s lover cheating is not his responsibility.
And Sand’s choice of actions is stealing and spreading fucking revenge porn. Where is not only Top he hates so much but also Boston who did to Sand what? Made an ugly scene on his birthday and ruined his whatever it was with Ray? Bitchy behavior 100%, but not on, you know, illegally recorded sex tape level.
He regrets it later, but two people he apologized to - rightfully so - are Ray and Nick. Not, you know, Boston for example.
I mean, how the thing Sand did with Top is different from the thing Mew did with Boston? In details - yes. In motivation and general action - the same shit.
And I know that the majority of saving Sand agenda is directed towards his relationship with Ray. I get it. I feel it (I have a very complicated mix of very complex feelings about that one but I digress). But I do feel that Sand isn’t criticized enough for his actions towards Top (and Boston).
Compare it with the amount of criticism towards:
1. Nick recording and using TopBoston footage;
2. Boston recording and using RayMew footage;
3. Mew stealing and using Boston footage;
The only person I doubt here to criticize hard is Ray cause while he got and resend this fucking sex tape and I do think it was wrong I kind of understand his situation. I mean he did receive it passively not actively and I doubt Mew believed him without proof. It still sucks from his side to use it and I don’t forgetting him but he was kind of a tool not a participant so yeah.
All of them are clearly wrong and deserve discussion about their behavior and all the critique they get. But so as Sand. The thing is, Sand is not a victim of Top.
Top is a victim of Sand.
And it’s absolutely not about Top being good or bad or Sand being good or bad it’s really about humans being complex and depending on that specific situation. It’s always about complexity and context.
Sand is, if generalizing, a good person. But he also selfish by some degree and categorical and has some deep trauma over his ex lover. And he does fucked up stuff.
That’s why I found Sand’s attitude towards Mew especially interesting. With MewTop situation he probably didn’t really care but at some level had a sense of justice. In his eyes, Mew is as victim of Top as he was. So Mew deserves to know the truth.
But with MewRay? And that’s where the fun (and also clear speculations) begins. Sand doesn’t have a beef towards Mew about Ray loving him and prioritizing him over Sand, at least for now. Maybe because he learned something through his last relationship, but with his behavior towards Top I doubt it. It’s probably partially because Ray is technically not his lover or boyfriend or monogamous partner - he doesn’t owe Sand anything and while he’s angry and sad he understands that.
But it may also be about the Mew technically being there first. You know, how Sand was with his lover until Top appeared. Ray loved Mew way before he even knew Sand exists. It’s actually Sand in this analogy who takes Ray away from Mew (not that he knew about it or Mew cared but you get my point). So Sand doesn’t blame Mew for being with Ray. He probably - understandably so - blames Ray for playing with his feelings and also blames himself for falling into it.
And now here is a part when I just speculate about cool plot line we’d probably never get so feel free to stop reading now. Like for real. So Sand is fine with Mew and, honestly, good for him. My question is: if Sand will buy this RayMew relationship thing. And then Ray gets back to him. Will he resist temptation?
We have a small chance that Sand will get some self respect and won’t take Ray back immediately, of course. But in a case of Mew. If Sand is stupid enough to believe there is something happening between Ray and Mew from Mew’s side, will he stay away cause of respect towards Mew and their relationship? Or will he “play Top card” and - how was it? - steal Ray to himself?
Cause oh my lord he wants Ray for himself. He can agree with Nick and his “I don’t want be his first and only it’s enough to be with him” as much as he wants but we all know that even Nick doesn’t really think so. Sand probably also doesn’t want to deal with Ray at all by that point but totally opposite desires can coexist.
It would be really interesting to watch his internal conflict about being better person but still losing to his desire plays out but I really doubt Mew and Ray will last long enough to us see it.
#ofts#only friends the series#only friends#only friends meta#only friends sand#I swear I see someone saying Sand didn’t do anything wrong ONE MORE TIME#I will explode#maybe I should stop using dead bird app and that’s all#but for real#please we all understand that I’m talking here about one specific topic and he is way more complex than just that right?
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Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #282
Today started out normally. But it ended kind of weird.
J made a bunch of rice not too long ago. Like… a bunch of rice. And on the day we went to the reptile and arthropod expo, we also went to the local food co-op on the way home, because J was hungry. Not being one to pass up opportunities, I decided to snag some natto while I was there. But there were three different kinds, and I couldn't choose, and so in my typical style, I decided "fuck it" and got all three…
...Here's what the contents look like:
...Hey, Sephiroth? Do you like natto? I've heard that it's a very polarizing food; in my part of the world, people usually either really hate it or love it a lot, with very little in between, or so I've heard. I wonder what you think...
Normally, in my part of the world, one gets natto by going to the frozen foods section of the Asian grocery store, if there is one. I live in a place that's pretty diverse (and it's AWESOME), so we have Asian grocery stores, Middle Eastern grocery stores, and Hispanic grocery stores, too. We might have more, but... maybe I didn't find them yet. My city isn't as diversified as New York City, but it's still pretty good. Pretty good...
Well anyway. I don't really like the frozen natto by itself; it's really good mixed with rice, for sure!! But this stuff that comes in these jars... I could just eat it with a spoon. I wonder if it has to do with the fact that it hasn't been frozen first. I wouldn't know. Maybe someday, I should go to Japan and see what natto is like over there; I imagine it's oodles better than whatever we have over where I live!
Anyway, we had a bunch of rice, and we had bacon, because I got some from the local convenience store chain on my way home from therapy on Tuesday; M had left the car in a state with low tire pressure and low gas, so I figured the thing to do was to take care of it before coming home, and the convenience store chain called Stewart's (unique to my region!) has gasoline and free air, and also snacks.
So... after doing the whole "responsible adult thing", I decided I get to have snacks. And I went inside the Stewart's, but nothing appealed to me, so I just got a Birthday Cake Shake for M and a chocolate milkshake for J; Stewart's sells these in bottles, and they're really good! And then I saw the bacon, and since we already had rice, eggs, and natto, I decided to get it! And today, I had enough time and energy to prepare it! So that's what I did!
I like to bake bacon in the oven; it's super convenient that way, and you don't get grease splattering everywhere, and it's easy to get it to cook evenly that way. It's just a matter of arranging it on a baking sheet with some parchment paper...
...You stick it in an oven at 400 degrees F (or 204.4 degrees C) for about 25 minutes, depending on how crispy you like it.
Here's how it turned out!
...And if you're wondering what I did with all that rendered fat? Of course, I put it in a jar!
...I used some of it to cook eggs with nice, runny yolks::
...I also used some to fry up some leftover rice, with all three of the different kinds of natto mixed in:
...The result was an epic bowl of deliciousness! Want some...?
...I spent most of the rest of the day playing Dead Cells. I managed to defeat The Hand of the King in the training room with only 4 Brutality, 4 Tactics, and 22 Survival, for 8 points less than the recommended total; my damage multiplier was less than half of what it should have been, while using a play style that is not well-suited for him, and I smashed him up anyways. If I reach him in one of my next runs, he's gonna be in BIG trouble, lemme tell ya!!
I also made chicken leg quarters today - y'know, the same recipe that I've shown you at least twice before. It's a classic for a reason, haha! I was able to serve it up with some leftover broccoli and carrots that J cooked up the other day, as well as the mashed pumpkin I made yesterday. It was good stuff!!! But I didn't think to take any pictures for you; I'm sorry about that.
And here's where it gets weird.
So... M, and J, and I were supposed to go see that Wild Robot movie today, at 7:10. But when we got to the door of the building, there was a pigeon chilling out there, on the ground. It's weird to see pigeons on the ground this late at night. And it wasn't very mobile; it looked kinda haggard, and it seemed sluggish.
...Well. If you've been reading my letters up until this point, you already know where this is going. You already know that I couldn't just leave it there like that. So I didn't. Needless to say, we ended up not seeing the movie in favor of prioritizing the safety of the pigeon.
The nearby animal hospital is closed this late at night, though. We decided to put it in the upstairs bathroom so that it can have space to move, without any risk of our cats getting to it. We put it in the bathtub with a towel for some soft bedding; we expect that it'll poop, and a towel and a bathtub are easy to clean:
...I think it has some kind of respiratory illness. When I tried to reach out to pet it, it made a weird squeaking wheeze; that's not a normal sound for a pigeon.
We're going to bring it to the nearby animal hospital first thing in the morning; they open at 7:30am. They treat wild creatures. Pigeons are technically not wild; they are feral. They used to be human companions before they were discarded as though they are worthless. Nowadays, despite the fact that they used to be friends to humans, they are treated like filthy, disgusting nuisances; it's not fair. I guess I have a bit of a soft spot for them as a result.
...They deserved so much better than this...
And before you ask - yes, we know better than to give it any food or water; we don't know what's wrong with it, and the last thing we need is to give it things to put into its stomach, only to have it choke on its own vomit or something later. No harm will come to it if it goes to bed without dinner; don't worry.
...I just hope that whatever it's sick with is curable, and that it's not on its last legs. But it being on its last legs seems unlikely; it's still cognizant enough to recognize me as a threat, even if it was too weak to get away. That's probably a good sign. We dimmed the lights in the bathroom and closed the door; it's someplace quiet, safe, and warm. Even if it passes away in the night, it'll still be better than passing away on cold, hard pavement on a chilly autumn evening.
...Incidentally, this will be the third sick pigeon I've pulled off the streets of my city. One of them recovered after being sent to the animal hospital. The other one was sick with some kind of digestive system issue; that one didn't make it even after we sent it to the animal hospital, but at least it didn't have to spend its final moments on the pavement in the cold, snowy December air - back when Decembers in my region used to actually be properly cold.
I'm really glad that M and J don't get upset with me for the fact that I can't do nothing when I see something in trouble. I've had partners in the past who would roll their eyes at me and scold me for caring. The people I was raised by were the sorts of people who would roll their eyes at me and scold me for caring. I can still almost hear them: "It's just a stupid fucking pigeon; you're gonna make us miss a movie for a stupid fucking pigeon?" Or else call me gross for being willing to wrap a "dirty" animal in my cardigan. and try to keep it safe.
...But you know. This sort of thing, besides how great they are at maintaining a comfortable temperature for my body and keeping my pasty white ass safe from the sun, is exactly why I wear them. Like your long coat, it's a utility item. It becomes a backpack, a towel, a pillow, a wrap, and whatever else I can think of in a pinch.
...Anyway, I'm really glad that I'm not around people who will scold me for having basic empathy anymore. We can see the movie tomorrow.
...Well. If we're gonna get to the animal hospital right as it opens, I need to be up early - to the tune of 6:30am. It's already almost 9; I had better get ready for bed. Maybe if I still have a few moments after my CPAP is washed and my teeth are brushed, I'll play a little more Dead Cells.
I'll leave this here just in case:
twitch_live
I love you. So please do stay safe out there, okay? Please come back home to us in one piece. Both your world and my world need you.
I'll write again tomorrow.
Your friend, Lumine
#sephiroth#ThankYouFFVIIDevs#ThankYouFF7Devs#ThankYouSephiroth#final fantasy vii#final fantasy 7#ff7#ffvii#final fantasy vii crisis core#final fantasy 7 crisis core#final fantasy crisis core#ffvii crisis core#ff7 crisis core#crisis core#ff7r#final fantasy vii remake#final fantasy 7 remake#ffvii remake#ff7 remake#final fantasy vii rebirth#final fantasy 7 rebirth#ffvii rebirth#ff7 rebirth#final fantasy 7 ever crisis#ffvii ever crisis#ff7 ever crisis#ffvii first soldier#pigeon#epic breakfast#wholesome
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“My five starts danmei novels.” Short, well, you do know, not short reasons why I like them.
🎋 —C Language Cultivation.
carrd.
Programming? Cultivation? A pretty man with long hair? Fucking swipe my card— wait, I don't own a card... Anyways, you get my point!
This novel, C Language Cultivation, had all the possible elements to make it into the top of my favourite novels. Did it achieve it? Well, fellas, it is in the post for something!
Believe me, for a moment, I was crazy enough to think that studying Computer Science because of this book was a good idea of a degree (it is, but Angie is a literature girl), so Imagine how good it is.
If you're done with slow burn (I'm never done with slow burn, but there are times when I appreciate a couple who gets straight to the point), read C Language Cultivation! Dong Jun and Lin Xun had THEE tension going on from the moment they've met, and I was screaming with every single interaction.
I believe this novel had one of the best plot twists I've read in my entire life (and I've been reading since I was 10, guys, 10 years old!). I was literally staring into the wall, trying to process what I've just read. I still can't believe how it fucking played with me.
Alas, Dong Jun and I share birthdays! Do you need another reason to start reading it, like, mmm, NOW?
🎋 —Beyond The Outline.
carrd.
Grab yourself to something because this is the second, THE SECOND novel with almost no angst (there are sad moments, but it's mostly cute) that I ranked as a five starts book. The author? Obviously, Mu Gua Huang.
You see, guys, Mu Gua Huang makes me love happiness and to be quite addicted to it. Once I started this novel, I would keep reading it until 5 a.m., and it was worth it!
Beyond The Outline has a precious message behind the hilarious and mysterious situation where two high school students, completely opposite from each other, switch bodies after being hit by lightning. I was this emoji 🥺 all the time.
I love this couple. Shao Zhan 🤧, look, I don't mean to spoil you, but he does something that I was like, “No man will do this for me never. He's the last romantic.” He's the best boy and the best boyfriend. If someone hates him, they seriously need some help.
🎋 —Alpha Predator.
No carrd, unfortunately.
Some of you may say, “Angie, didn't you review this novel before?” And I will do it again.
Alpha Predator is the last novel of the 188男团 (if you don't know, basically, the gongs are all 188 and scummy) and the best I've read from Suida. This book basically fell from the sky for me. I was on a reading block (is that the right term in English?) and needed something that made me retake my usual reading rhythm. May I aggregate that this has been the best novel I read in 2023 by so far? It is.
As the title suggests, Alpha Predator is an ABO world where rank plays an important role in society. The ML and scummy gong (mi bebé solo estaba jugando) is an S class Alpha, which means he is the one on top of the pyramid. I love Qu Moyu, and I am willing to defend him with my life. I accept that I tweeted that he was a stupid Alpha, but we all make mistakes, hahaha.
I love QuShen. 💜 They are my favourite 188 couple, and the best, in my not so humble opinion. They admire each other, and they come to love each other despite all the misunderstandings, and that makes me 🤧.
If you like scummy gongs and trust my taste, give it a try!
🎋 —Po Yun.
carrd.
What do we have here? My last reading, the best crime book, and the novel that made me couldn't look my chemistry teacher straight in the eye! The last point is kind of a long story that I'll tell you some other day.
Anyways, who are these sexy gentlemen? I'll introduce you to Yan Xie and Jiang Ting, the protagonists and couple of Po Yun!
I have great memories of reading this novel. I remember sending voice messages to one of my friends about this book: “Girl, you wouldn't believe what just happened...” Dalia and I agree that this is an amazing book.
I also found it quite realistic in the aspect of how much can drugs fuck up someone's life. I won't elaborate on this because it's spoiler, but you will piece a lot of things once you know about a certain character past.
As for the romance, AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA, WHY THE FUCK I WASN'T IN THAT WEDDING. I WOULD HAVE CRIED WHILE DRINKING EXPENSIVE WINE (I don't even like wine). They're HOT and they LOVE each other.
🎋 —First-Class Lawyer.
carrd.
Look, maybe I wouldn't have dropped out of law school if it were as entertaining as this novel, but it wasn't in my case. Putting that new fun fact about me aside, welcome to First-Class Lawyer by Mu Su Li.
This novel is set in a futuristic environment, so Yan Suizhi and Gu Yan are not just lawyers but interstellar lawyers. Amazing, isn't it? The mystery involves the other planets, so you'll see them space-travelling to find out the truth. And if that didn't sell you, Yan Suizhi is “dead.” Yup, our main character was awakened from death and put in another body in the first chapter. As the critics (me) say, “You know the book is good when the author kills the protagonist in the first page.”
The couple, aw. Imagine having someone you could tell anything, it doesn't matter how insignificant it is, and that they listen to you and that they love you so much —that's Gu Yan and Yan Suizhi. They're also teacher × student, from those who like that kind of dynamic!
As I told you in the beginning, this is written by Mu Su Li, author of QQGK, which means it is freaking good!
Some of you may be wondering, “Where the fuck is BAB?” I'M WAITING FOR OFFICIAL ART. 😭 HOW AM I SUPPOSE TO ART BAIT YOU IF THERE IS NO OFFICIAL ART???? /cries in it's my favourite book and it doesn't have art even though it was signed to a lot of publications
[coughs] I hope you like this pt. 4 of Angie recs! I don't know when I'll post the next, but this is my humble effort of making you read these amazing novels!
#angie recs#danmei#danmei recs#c language cultivation#beyond the outline#alpha predator#po yun#first class lawyer#wrote his at 3 am again
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Platonic Soulmates AU pt3
Prev || Next
Two months after the New Year, the Moby Deck was moored on one of the captain’s favourite spots for relaxing in an effort to keep Ace with them for more than two days.
Who could have known that the whitebeards were so soft?
Deuce thought gratefully while trying to find Ace, he knows that this time he wouldn’t be in the crowd.
He’s truly grateful that Oyaji saw how special Ace is and that the crew was able to convince him to join.
The previous months were the happiest he has seen Ace look. And it helps that with Whitebeard it’s the safest Ace could be.
And with Ace’s eighteenth birthday, he thought it will only be better for his friend, however, he immediately isolated himself and started going on missions far from the Moby with no rhyme or reason.
He thought maybe he didn’t get Luffy as a soulmate or maybe life decided that Ace didn’t suffer enough and gave him no soulmate.
He wanted to give him some time to process it, If Ace went to this degree to get privacy to process it so be it, but he wasn’t getting better and he couldn’t corner him for a while but now is finally his chance to get through to him.
Finally, he found him on nearly the other side of the island in a secluded place.
“It has been hard to get a hold of you lately captain we’ve been worried.”
"...Sorry for worrying you."
“Alright, talk to me.” He started, sitting down next to him. “You know the deal, I listen, you talk and if it can be solved I'll help.”
“My Brother hates me” Ace stated as if it was a fact and not the most absurd thing he could say.
“What? Ace- No” Deuce chuckled uneasily, the fuck happened!? “Luffy could never hate you!”
“It’s not Luffy”
What? Does he mean from the crew, what happene-
“It’s Sabo.”
“...Ace- Sabo is-” He faltered, “You said he’s dead.”
“Yeah, I said-” He chuckled sorrowfully, a sound that should never ever be from Ace.
“I thought so,” His hand shook slightly as he pushed his sleeve up to show his tattoo. “But his mark turned blue.”
“His S turned blue, and I can’t think of anything else that’d make him fake his death and not tell me- tell us for Eight years that he was alive except that he hates me.”
His hands were shaking when Deuce took it in his, worrying that he would hurt himself from how hard he was gripping his tatto.
“Ace, don’t you think you’re jumping to conclusions? There could be another reason it doesn’t have to be hating you!”
“What other reason could be?” He whispered. “It has been Eight years Deuce, It can’t be protecting us because no one on Dawn knows he's alive! He has been declared dead by his family and other than them no one would hide it from us!”
“...Maybe he needed to make everyone else think he’s dead? And- and when it’d be safe he’d tell you?” It was a weak idea and he knows it but Deuce can’t believe that someone who grew up with Ace could do that to him!
“They already declared him dead.” Ace’s voice was monotone as if trying to distance himself from what he was saying, “His family, the town, the kingdom everyone knew he was the one on the boat and his family tried to bury it. So there’s no one to protect us from.”
Deuce wants to cut in, but he knows the best he can do now is to give him a listening ear and support first and help second.
“It was my fault from the start.” Tears started falling and Ace didn’t bother wiping away.
“I thought I knew better, I thought if he was with his family he would be safe, he would be cared for, they could give him what I can’t, that sooner or later he would hate what became of his life and wish for his old one.”
“I let that trash influence me, I let my doubt and insecurities turn me against my brother, I decided not to go and save him, I was the reason he was alone.”
“So Why wouldn’t he hate me?”
“Ace-”
“And I know!” He heaved, “I know I deserve his hate!”
“But why!?, Why couldn’t he tell Luffy?!”
“Why couldn’t he just tell us he was alive and then leave? It was my fault! Not Luffy’s, Not Dadan’s or Makino or Gramp!”
“I could have lived with his hate I just wanted him to live.”
“Thinking that he was dead, living without him, I have felt less, like there’s this part of me- of my soul that died with him”
“And I-” He gulped, looking as if he was pained to admit what he’ll say next, “and I want know did he never, once in those years feel like that? That no matter what he does, that gap in his life could never be filled.”
“Did he ever turn around expecting me to be there? Did he ever feel that his back is unprotected because I wasn’t there?”
“Do I even have the right to wish that my absence from his life affected him as much as it did me?”
“I get why he wouldn’t tell me” He whispered, lowering his hat to cover his face, “but why, why would he not tell Luffy?”
Deuce squeezed Ace’s hand wanting- no, needing him to focus on what he’ll say and not on whatever is going on in his brain.
“Ace you didn’t deserve this,” He started slowly. “You were a kid who life loved to screw with, who did the best he can for those who loved, and if somehow your brother really blames you for anything then know he’s wrong”
Ace’s eyes widened and he opened his mouth no doubt to object and defend his brother.
“No hear me out, whatever happened you were ten, you had no control over any of it, you’re a good person, a great captain, who’s loyal to his family and a great brother and I doubt anyone who knew you for more than a week could hate you, there must be another reason, alright?”
A skeptical hum is all he got and he knows it’s the most he can get now.
Right now the best they could do is finding Sabo. The easiest way would be waiting for his birthday, surely seeing the mark will make him come to Ace or at least make himself easy to find.
“Alright, you know when his eighteenth birthday is? If it’s soon we shoul-”
“NO!” Ace yelled, grabbing his shoulders “No, I have to find him before he gets his marks!”
“What! why?”
“Because I need the truth from him before he discovers that he’s stuck with me and decides to sacrifice his freedom for me!”
“Ace-”
“Deuce, he knows me, I know him, even if he hates me Sabo is the kindest person to live, if he discovers that he’s soulbonded to me, he’d force himself to forgive me or reconnect or something!”
“This is why I have to find him before the next month, I need the truth and not whatever crap he would pull because he’s being kind!”
This is why he took missions non-stop? To find Sabo? Not because he was guilty?
Who’s he kidding it’s Ace it’s definitely both.
“Alright alright we will do it your way, we will find him before your birthday, BUT we need help you spent two months already randomly searching now we need an expert.”
“...Who is it Haruta?”
“No, Your Grandfather, hear me out, He’s a high-ranking marine He must have more connections to the civilian side than us, If your brother was a pirate we would have seen his bounty so he must be a civilian and I doubt that Whitebeard’s network would be focused on the civilian side let alone outside of the Grand Line, your Grandfather is our best shot at this”
“...You’re right.” Thankfully he looked convinced hopefully Garp would be able to help.
“and his connection with the revs could be useful too.”
Having found something to focus on other than his self-deprecating thoughts Ace looks better already, hopefully, Deuce’s faith in his brother is rewarded or he will make sure that Sabo won’t have a peaceful life ever again.
Seas what would his captain do without me? Can't believe he forgot such an important-
“DID YOU SAY THE REVS!?”
#platonic soulmates au#one piece#op#portgas d ace#masked deuce#self indulgent#my writing#portgas d. ace
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That's it. This is the tilt for me.
I'm Japanese. I was born in Japan. No, it wasn't on a USArmy base. I'm mixed, but not with what a North American person would consider white. I don't give a fuck about your media takes. I'm trans too so miss me with that. I'm your age. I just turned 31. Happy birthday to me.
So now that we have that out of the way,
This is so far one of your most egregious racist moments so I'm going to do my best to communicate politely and calmly why the way you're acting is pissing me off for both our sakes because seeing this pop up over and over again has genuinely been upsetting me for a whole day now. This is for you and all the anons and the people talking out of their ass around this.
Kun is not gendered. No matter what your Duolingo degree says, it really is just Mr/Ms, but it's chill. Like I'd not call you that because I don't know you from Adam, but I'd call my friend that. I use it with as many girls as I do boys and some bigendered people as well as enbies. San doesn't cover everything and tbh if you use it with your close friends it sounds like you're mad at them about something. Chan is not just for girls either. I call my male relatives chan.
It's all fucking subjective. I promise you it's not pronouns. You can absolutely use it to be offensive, but that's not the case here. They are calling them kun the way I'd call a lady friend kun because we're closer than san, but I still want to show them respect. Like if I called you Lily-tan or Lily-chan I'd be belittling you way beyond anything a kun could hit you with. Hell, I could call you Lily-hime and depending on the subjective conversation and how I say it I could be doing the closest thing to slurring you a honorific can get. It's not a pronoun
But I'm not going to slur you and I'm not going to be rude to you. No more rude than having a bit of a terse conversation.
Damn about nearly every time I see your name pop up you've got something to say about the Japanese, but that's really common in lefttist spaces and it's getting more and more common to just be totally ok with othering, belittling, fetishizing and excluding east asians. I see the posts every day and I sit here and I don't say shit because I feel like it's not my place to speak up. I'm nobody. So I take that fucking hate and I just eat it because I don't want to be confrontational because that shit is online poison. My fun little hobby is probably over now because I am saying something and that's just something else I've got to eat and accept. Maybe that's why no one is just @'ing you about it, I don't know. We're several generations of afraid of confrontation on this website.
I need you to take a step back and look at how you're talking about us. We're people. We're people in a country with just as many problems as Canada or the USA or England. So many times I see you dismissing us as sex pests and that fucking hurts. I see it. We see it. We are here and we see those posts constantly. I could so easily turn this around on any North American. Bringing up any heinous thing the people in your country have done, but I can't because none of you can take it. Not a single one of you can grin and bear it like the rest of us have to do outside those countries in what's supposed to be our fucking community too.
And it's not just you, but you're the one here with a following. You are the example. I can't ask you to be perfect nor will I ever because we are both human beings so we can't be perfect, but I can ask you to do what I've had to do in the past. Take a step back and evaluate this bias because you are not saying this shit in a private space where only your close friends are there to nod along with your quiet racism. I can hear you. I can see you. I'm just the one who spoke up, but I'm not the only one getting burned by this.
Thanks for reading if you did.
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I'm really struggling my dudes. With just like. Why I exist.
I couldn't be what my ex-partner needed, no matter how much I tried and tried to communicate and tried to be. They found reasons to hate me anyway. People always go. They hit a point where they know me too well and then... that's it. They get tired of me. They get resentful of just... who I am. No matter what I do, earnest or masking or... whatever. I'm torn between 'I'm just a terrible person I guess? Maybe I'm a sociopath, maybe I just. I'm not okay.' And 'damn people keep being shitty to you, that's some bad luck. Or do you just attract shitty people?' I don't know. Both could be true or neither. I'm over trying. And I say that but my ass is lonely and craves connection and I absolutely will trust again and get fucked again.
I also am so over being unemployed. And me getting rejected from my absolute dream job pretty much the same day as the latest permutation of the above is just. The cherry on top. Four interviews, that all went great, a presentation and lunch with the whole team and... generic rejection email. I'm crushed and feel defeated and useless. It was a dream position that captured both my skills and my passions. Would have been a lifelong career that I was actually excited about. And now I'm stuck back in indeed hell looking at print jobs I'm not enthused about and would just be grinding for a paycheck, miserable. But it's the only other skill I have.
I'm tired. I'm lonely. I'm unhappy with where I am in life, no friends in my town, a single online friend who I love more than anything and am deeply grateful for but feel like a burden to, a charity case, and no footing in life and no career, useless degree in a shitty job market.
This last week has been hard. It's been crushing me. And my birthday is coming up and it's just been a shitty year. Last year was so good and in Feb this year it just all careened downhill. My dad's pressuring me to clean out my childhood room bc he's emptying the whole house, I don't have storage for all these memories in my 700sq ft apartment I might lose if I don't get a damn job, so it's all getting tossed, I just...
Why. Can this year give me a break. Some slack.
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hi hello everyone!! im here w yu sera and her luck manip ability!! aka ur rabbit's foot & broken mirror in one! ik ik ... 2 in 1 .... what a steal ! formal descriptions / pages will b coming this weekend!!!
dc is avail. upon req if u prefer it over tumblr ims (which im ok with, btw!!) & like this if u wna put our beasts in some situations (if u want to plot) ! OH! and ty to evry1 who has alrdy reached out!! tw for mentions of : death, murder, drowning, sewer side.
ㅤㅤㅤ 𖹭 ㅤㅤㅤ statistics .
name : yu sera. (유세라)
birthday: 980922. (twenty5)
hometown: yongin, south korea.
education: master degree in nursing, second yr.
residence: yellow hall('s resident advisor)
ㅤㅤㅤ 𖹭 ㅤㅤㅤ biography & co .
you see, sera's life has been L after L after L, back to back
her mother? poor, modest, v excited to have a daughter. her f*ther? HWAKTHU. fluctuating between rich and poor, gambling his life away, alw fucking around, messing w the wrong people, scamming!
scammer on scammer hate crime ensues when a dubious low budget genie irl tells sera's dad "give me all the $$$ u have. but dw dw! i can grant u a wish... such as.... i'll give ur newborn daughter the power of Luck." and he leaves out the part that Luck is bad n good.
and what does her dad do? he listens!!! a born, living, lucky charm? sign him tf up!!!! he waits for sera to be born, tells her mom that he has to leave n he will take sera (so he doesnt have to share the lucky charm yknow), the mom tries to fight for the daughter but... ope... person w money vs person w no money.... yea... head low.
sooooo, she spends her childhood pretty happy. daddy's girl n all! w an ability that she believes to be some form of Good Luck Manip. she sees her dad as the best man in the world and he. loves. it. why? bc it makes her ability v powerful and he keeps on winning, buying expensive things, not being caught etc etc... just living the best life off of sera... but ofc. nothing lasts forever.
sera enters her teenage years and hell breaks loose. she accidentally learns that her mother didnt abandon them (as per her dad's fake sob story), she figures out that her dad is no Fair businessman and it alllll comes crumbling down.
so young and so shaken up with new, different emotions, she quickly learns that she can manifest bad luck as well. luckily(?) for her dad, she was still in denial so the bad luck wasnt strong enough to k*ll him off.... but it did take away all of his riches which cld count as murder in his books. long story short, he becomes a Monster, trashes her things, kicks her out, leaves her out in the street w nothing.
i'll try to make this part rlly brief bc i want her Trauma to be traumaing but i also dont want to get into graphic deets!! couch surfing at a friend. friend dies. parents hate her. sera starts searching for her mom, someone tells her that she's dead. ope... sera tries to end it all bc of that by drowning. randomly gets saved. ends up living w this cute ol lil lady, a retired nurse, who feels like a grandma figure for sera... baow. accidental bad luck manifestation makes them get into an accident, guess who survives thru survival luck and who doesnt. yea....
so ... you may be thinking ... now what. WELL. she hears abt sua ... abt the Patch (one that she cldnt afford/get her hands onto) so she decides well. im sick of being the bad guy (accidentally) all the time, im sick of spiraling, im sick of my ability fluctuating. let me become a nurse and help out! maybe i'll finally get to use my power for proper good this time....
soooooo she tries to cheer up during her uni years. she gets more control over her ability but theres still lots to learn! her emotions still affect her deeply but its no longer THAAAAAAAAT bad.
her goals? become a v v v good nurse. gain complete control over her ability and use it w her job. help ppl w her power. find her mom. and... devious smile..... find her dad to k*ll him w the bad luck.
ㅤㅤㅤ 𖹭 ㅤㅤㅤ ability .
luck manip!!! she can give u good luck or bad luck!!! her eyes turn green when it's good luck & black when it's bad luck! she can touch u, look at u, think of u, it works either way! ofc, she can do more w a touch than w a thought!
she can make you get the luck you need to find your keys or to win the lottery! she can make you spill ur coffee all over ur new clothes or get u vvv sick! anything goes! if it's a casual ez kind of luck (keys, coffee), then she'll need a few moments to regain her energy. if its smth more extreme (lottery, sickness), she needs a few days (even up to a week), to recover!!! the more complex it is, the more it drains her energy!
it's all within d laws of physics & limits of 'reality' ! so she cant get you to magically materialize ur lost keys back and she cant spill invisible coffee on u! ALSO!!! this ability only works in like... idk.... a 100-200 miles radius!
her Survival Luck is also present n exists and she can (and has alrdy) managed to survive a bunch of extreme situations (see above)! however, the Way that she survives it.... out of her control fr.... cld be a scratch, cld be 5 broken bones, not up to sera!
ㅤㅤㅤ 𖹭 ㅤㅤㅤ brief personality .
she's v chill and looooooves helping people!!! not super hyper BUT still a fun girl nonetheless! not boring by any means despite being v toned down and lowkey!
DESPITE the previous bullet point, she is extremely afraid of getting attached to people and LET ALOOOOONE love them so she tries to keep everyone at arms length. why? obv bc of her ability and her fear of not being able to control it properly... she doesnt want another friend + grandma incident.
has a tendency to become mellow / nostalgic and can be caught overthinking... which she tries to do while on that nullivi .... ofc! LDFDFGJJ
ㅤㅤㅤ 𖹭 ㅤㅤㅤ plots .
a few friends????? a few foes?????? a few younger ppl @ yellow hall she's helped out as a resident advisor??? someone who tries to get close to her but shes ADAMANT on not letting that happen?
ppl affected by her good luck..... what abt ppl affected by her bad luck.... ooo swearing up and down that she didnt mean it and it was accidental... cld be true or not. ppl accusing her of using her powers when she didnt? OOOO what abt using the bad luck on a person that she was told was a bad person but sera was only manipulated into thinking soooooooo ooooooouuuuu
someone who's known her ever since she was a teenager? watching her go thru the whole spiral of bad luck??? maybe theyre older and even told her abt sua!!!
what if there's someone who jus doesnt believe that she has an ability? or they do and they think its a stupid one? NLKFJGN idk...
i kinda want lots of angst for her.... i think it'd be fitting.... lets put sera and ur muse thru the pain machine tgt!
THANK YOU FOR READING / SKIMMIN THRU THISSSSSSSSSS SMUAAAAAAAAAAAAACH!!
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What about your least favorite Hey Arnold episodes? If you have any...
"If you have any" lol anon, you get me.
Honestly, calling them "least favorite" *is* a stretch, but they certainly aren't what I immediately ready for.
Abner Come Home is what first comes to mind, mostly because it always makes me cry, and I hate crying when I'm trying to enjoy my nerd time. Mugged also gets that treatment, to a degree, because the part where Arnold unnecessarily attacks the guy asking for directions breaks my heart.
Little Miss Perfect isn't a favorite, mostly because it always reminds me of how much more they could have done with Lila's character. The ENTIRE point of the episode was that she wasn't perfect - that she was putting up a front to hide the fact that her life was painfully hard and sad while she and her dad tried to make ends meet. Given that they're living in the city (where things are known to be expensive), I wish they had done more throughout the show with Lila not being able to afford things the other kids take for granted, and her "perfection" only being surface level while we see peeks at the true struggles she faces within. We don't get that. We get one episode, and then she became a Mary Sue (and an especially annoying one, at that), and it's SO disappointing.
That's honestly probably it. I know a lot of people hate Arnold Betrays Iggy, but I honestly don't hate it as much as most people do.
The usual criticism is that it's out of character, but given that the characters are nine I don't think it's that far off. Sometimes nine year olds do some pretty fucked up shit, and it seems totally out of nowhere, but it's because they're right at the age where they're starting to realize they have the power to really DO things, but they don't necessarily have the situational assessment or impulse control to make informed/good decisions. Honestly this could almost be an essay, so before I get too far off topic, I'm going to leave it at that lol
Thanks for the ask!! I swear, it feels like my birthday with all these beautiful Hey Arnold asks. Y'all are positivmaking my night ♡♡♡
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