#and left a lot of open ends in a way that wasn't as forgivable as the first season

[thebearer]

please please please need a part two of the fight blurb 😭 what happens next 😭😭😭

should i make it into a full fic omg?? maybe?? lol

but on the real, i think that he would have to take a leave from the restaurant, which truthfully, everyone needed. this is just what broke him. the one time he actually tries to deal with his shit and not just blow up, get embarrassed, try to make it up, and repeat the cycle with no real change. i mean, you took his babies? anchovy and teddy. you're not returning his calls. richie, fak, and sweeps are alternating wellness check watches because they're terrified he's going to hurt himself, especially after the way he spiraled when he found your wedding ring.

he knows where you're at. he managed to become technologically savvy all of a sudden and figured out how to see your location, that you shared with him when you first started dating. fak wouldn't let him take his car. richie had put him on a full blown "psych ward type shit" lockdown until he "got his shit together, cousin".

"richie said-"

"-richie's a fuckin' moron, give me my fucking keys, fak!"

"carmen," fak frowns. "i-i can't."

so carmen walked. he walked to sugar and pete's house. nearly an hour walk through chicago. smoking so much he felt sick.

pete answered the door, face falling as soon as he saw carmen.

"carm, h-hey, man-"

"-where is she?" carmen wasn't interested on any sort of small talk, tunnel visioned to get to you.

"uh, i-i don't-"

"-pete, i really don't want you to fuck with me right now, alright." carmen took a deep breath, throat burning with tears. "i need to see- i-i need to see her pete." he couldn't bring himself to even say your name.

a tiny meow came from behind pete, anchovy skippering towards carmen with bright eyes, tail raised. it made carmen's jaw clench, tears blurring his vision. he knew you had to be close by. looking at the time, you were probably feeding teddy, maybe putting her down for a nap. he should have been more considerate, came later in the day, carmen thought.

pete looked at the cat, down the hall, then back at carmen. "carm..." pete hesitated, gripping the door, letting it shut gently, shielding something behind him. "you know i can't."

"what the fuck? pete that's- just let me in." anger surged through carmen's chest, trying to swallow it down. all he'd been was angry. angry and sick and distraught, a never ending cycle for weeks, just amplified by your leaving.

"you want to get her back? quit actin' like a goddam baby." richie sneered one night, just days ago, when carmen was especially awful and mean. "quit actin' like this isn't your fuckin' fault. like you didn't do this to yourself. take some fuckin' accountability, grow the fuck up, and get your motherfuckin' shit together. and maybe-maybe you'll get your family back."

carmen turned, running a hand over his face, trying to calm himself. keep himself from crying, from screaming, from pushing pete down and running back there so he could see you himself- throw himself at your feet and beg for forgiveness.

"pete, please? please?" carmen's voice wobbled, breaking gently. "please l-let me talk to her. just let me- let me tell her i'm sorry. don't-"

"-carmen?" sugar's voice came from behind pete. her face dropped, different than pete's, her's was angry. "what the fuck are you doing here?"

"why do you think i'm here, natalie? huh?-"

"-oh, you've got a lot of fucking nerve showing up here." natalie sneered, pulling the door open and stepping out. "pete, go inside."

"nat-"

"-i got it." natalie hissed, eyes narrowing at carmen. she waited until pete left, shaking her head at him. "you should be fucking ashamed-"

"-i am-"

"-mortified." sugar continued. "do you know what i came home to the other night? i came home to pete taking care of your baby because your wife came here sobbing- sobbing, because you screamed at her? what the fuck is wrong with you? huh?"

"i don't know." carmen's voice was tight, fighting a tremble. "i-i don't fuckin' know. i didn't- i-i didn't mean-" a tear fell, the final crack in his demeanor. carmen wasn't sure how he had tears left, how he could sob anymore. yet here he was, on his sister's porch, tears flowing again.

sugar didn't comfort him, didn't move, just watched him through glaring eyes. "please let me s-see her. let me se-ee teddy, sugar, don't-don't keep my kid from me-"

"-i'm not keeping your kid from you." sugar snapped. "i didn't take teddy away. you know who did? you. you did carmen."

carmen flinched, he knew it was true but it still stung. "i know you don't remember dad very well, but you're acting just like him." sugar sneered.

"and before you try and come up with an excuse-"

"-i-i'm not-"

"-i want you to know, that every day. every single fucking day, there's days i want to drink myself to sleep. that mj or maggie make me want to pull my hair out and scream, or pete does something that infuriates me, but you know what i don't do?" sugar stepped towards carmen, arms still crosses. "i don't yell at them, i don't drink myself incoherent, i don't fucking act like mom or dad because i know how that felt." sugar jabbed a finger in her chest, eyes holding carmen's gaze intensely.

"i know how that fucked me up, i know how it fucked them up, how it fucked you and mikey up too- how it fucked everything in our fucking life up!" natalie laughed humorlessly. "and the last thing, the very last thing i would want, is to do that to pete, to my kids, to anyone."

carmen felt sick and yet eerily calm all at once. his chest was tight, he was sure he couldn't breathe, but he couldn't stop listening. a damning realization- a shameful one.

"you need to make up your mind, right here, right now, before you see anyone else." natalie stepped back towards the door. "you need to decide if you're going to continue to be a selfish piece of shit, or if you're going to change. and i can tell you, change is uncomfortable- it's not easy. you have to fight for it every single day. but i would rather do that than not have my family."

she looked down at carmen, twisting the knob. "you decide that, then maybe- maybe you can see them." carmen flinched at the door slamming behind her, not moving from his place on the porch, head in his hands.

fak showed up nearly an hour later, wide eyed and rambling about "how the fuck did you just leave? i was playing ball buster and-and then you're gone-"

carmen ignores him, sliding into the car slowly. "carmen?"

"you uh," carmen's voice is hoarse, staring straight ahead. "you said that, uh, that richie's got.... got someone for me to talk to?"

fak blinks, nodding slowly. "the therapist? yeah-"

"-take me there." carmen looks over at sugar's house. he isn't sure if it's his imagination or not, but for a moment he swears he can see you, peeking through the blinds.

"a-are you ok?" fak is worried, a little rattled at the sudden change. especially since carmen had been so adamant about not seeing "your stupid fuckin' therapist, richie, clearly she's no fuckin' good because look at you! you're still fucked up!" carmen's enraged words from days ago.

"no," carmen admits, throat swelling with a growing lump. "but, uh, i-i wanna be." he admits quietly, looking over at fak. "i gotta get my shit together, fak. i-i gotta be better for them."

fak doesn't deny it, doesn't console him. just goes quiet with a nod, driving away. carmen watches sugar's house disappear in the rearview, his heart aching, breaking, but he knows natalie is right. he knows he'll be back once he's better, that he has to be better. for teddy. for you. for your family.

[dreamescapeswriting]

All Warmed Up ~ BC

WORD COUNT: 2.7K

GENRE: angst with a fluffy ending, chan not realising/ignoring that the reader is sick, sick reader, caring for you, Noway I'd forgive him wihtout some major grovelling tbf though

PAIRING: Chan x Fem!Reader

⤜Copyright: © DreamEscapesWriting - January 2024

⤜MASTERLIST

For days this headache had been brewing for you, it had started as nothing more than a dull pain in the front of your head but as time went on it continued to get worse and worse until you could barely stand it anymore. You’d called in sick to work for days now and it was getting to the point where your boss was beginning to get annoyed with you for it, not that you could help it when your body decided to make you ill though.

Normally you weren’t the type to let some sort of bug or flu keep you down but this one seemed to be knocking you down again and again and it was a struggle for you to even keep your eyes open. It was hard for you to even go to the bathroom without feeling so light-headed you were going to fall so you held onto the walls whenever you walked.

“Channie?” You coughed out as you heard him getting up, or getting in you weren’t entirely sure what time it was since the blackout curtains were still drawn shut keeping everything out. It was the only thing keeping your headache somewhat muted at this point and you were doing everything to keep any form of light out of your way. Your phone hadn’t been turned on since yesterday and you were laid in complete darkness, something that seemed to be helping you an awful lot lately.

“What are you doing in bed?” Chan grumbled a little harshly as he made his way over the windows throwing the curtains open and blinding you instantly as you let out a choked whine. 

“I’m sick.” You grumbled pulling the sheets over your head but it was as though he’d not heard you as he grabbed his bag and pulled his laptop free from his bag. You knew he’d been working harder than usual lately since their new album was dropping any second but this was somehow different to any other comeback stress you’d seen your boyfriend under.

He’d barely had time to look away from the screen to eat, let alone look at you and see the state that you were in and you didn't hate him for it. The two of you had an understanding that when he was so busy you weren't going to hear from him much, but knowing he was alive and eating was enough for you when he was in comeback mode. 

But it annoyed you as to why he was asking why you were home, you’d told him all week that you hadn’t been feeling well, texting him that you were home and for him to be quiet when he came in but all of the notifications were read but never replied to. Hell, you'd even asked him to pick you up some cold patches and he had. Had he forgotten you were sick that quickly?

You didn’t take it to heart since you knew he was busy but it started to grate you that he didn’t even act as though he cared that you were so sick. Not that you were doing it to gain his attention but to know your boyfriend cared wasn't too much to ask, was it?

Chan mumbled something you didn’t quite hear before slipping his headphones onto his head and starting to work on his laptop, you slowly peeked out from under the blankets and groaned as the sun felt like it was burning your eyes into raisins. 

“Fuck,” You grumbled reaching to the bedside cabinet for the sunglasses you’d kept nearby for when you had to venture to the bathroom and you slid them on slowly standing up. The clock on the wall said it was almost nine which meant you were once again not going to work and you needed to phone your boss.

“Have you seen my phone?” You mumbled out, searching around the bed for when you last saw it but it was nowhere in sight and it wasn’t even on the bedside cabinet either. You could have sworn you left it near you last night for when you were eventually going to need to use it again.

“Channie?” You asked out before tapping his shoulder and a very annoyed-looking Chan turned to look at you. There were bags under his eyes and you could bet he hadn't slept the night before,

“What?!” He bit out, staring at you and waiting impatiently for you to ask him whatever it was.

“Have you seen my phone? I need to call in sick.” You didn’t even react to his angry voice, you didn’t have the energy to.

“You’re calling in sick again?” Disbelief masked his tone as he turned his head back to look at the screen,

“I can barely move without feeling dizzy and I have this giant headache,” You groaned rubbing your temples a little before Chan pulled his headphones over his head.

Maybe he somehow thought you weren’t going to hear him but the next sentence made your heart break into a million tiny pieces,

“You need to get over yourself, there are people worse off that are still going to work.” At this point, between him not even acknowledging that you were sick and his words it felt as though your heart had just been put through a paper shredder and you didn’t know what to do with yourself.

The response you had for him died in your throat when you saw him going straight back to working on his project. Somewhere inside of you, you knew that he was just acting out of stress but it didn’t stop the achingness you were now feeling inside of you. And maybe he was right? People did go to work when they were sick but you’d never been one of those people, you could barely function when a migraine came on and you would always take time off to start trying to feel better. 

So instead of phoning in sick you moved to the wardrobe very shakily, changed into some work clothes and carefully made your way out of the house and into the street. With how dizzy you were feeling you grabbed a cab not wanting to put anyone else or yourself in danger if you were to drive to work.

After a few hours of working in his room, Chan finally slipped off his headphones and smiled to himself pretty proud of how everything had come together. It was done and it was good, perfect even but he would never admit that. Everything was composed and edited and ready to be put into an album for review with the company and he couldn’t have been any happier with how it had gone. Now all he wanted to do was celebrate with you, go out and grab some food and then come back and do nothing for a few days since he would have some time off.

“Yn?! I finished, do you wanna go out and grab some food?” He called out as he walked out of the bedroom expecting to find you on the sofa but the house was quiet and cold and you were nowhere in sight. 

“Yn?” He tapped on the bathroom door before opening it and finding it empty and panic began to wash over him, if you weren’t in the house where were you? You should have finished work hours ago and been home long before now. Sprinting back to your shared room he grabbed his phone to check where you were and he had missed calls from unknown numbers and a few from the boys. But there was a blinking voicemail at the top of his screen.

“Hello Mr Bang, this is Doctor Kush from Seoul General Hospital, we have Miss Yln here and you’re listed as her emergency contact, please contact us again on this number.” Dread began to crush Chan like a ton of bricks and he tried calling your phone only it was going straight to voicemail, next he was calling the boys who appeared to be ignoring his calls. 

“I’m fine Lix,” You hissed trying to get out of the hospital bed but his hands kept pushing you back to lie down on the bed shaking his head at you. You'd wished they'd not called anyone but you'd been out cold so you couldn't tell them not to call anyone for you.

“I need to go to work, I’m fine.” It was a lie and you knew it but the words Chan had said to you kept bouncing around in your head and you couldn’t stop them. In a sick twisted way, your head was telling you to prove him right, that you could go it and go to work when you were sick and you couldn’t see just how wrong he was.

“I will ask them to sedate you if you don’t lay down right now.” Felix’s voice was stern and you stared at him with his unblinking eyes and knew that he was serious with his threat.

“What were you even thinking going to work?” after the hospital couldn’t get hold of Chan they’d called your second emergency contact in your phone which happened to be Felix who was a little overprotective of you. The two of you were close with one another and had been ever since you'd started dating Chan he was like a brother to you and you adored the relationship you had with him.

“I thought I felt better.” Felix didn’t believe it for one second as he noticed your top lip twitch and your nose wriggle, a clear sign that you were lying to him.

“And the real reason?” Felix stared at you and the two of you failed to notice that Chan was standing at the door and panting heavily out of breath. He'd been running from the car park and up the stairs since the elevators were taking too long for him to even get inside.

“There are people worse off than me that still go to work, so I should get over it and go.” The words drove a knife through Chan’s chest, almost as much as seeing you hooked up to an IV did and he felt as though he was going to throw up.

He hadn’t expected you to hear him and he didn’t even know why he’d said it to you, it wasn’t as though he’d meant it - not to you at least, never to you. 

Of all people, Chan knew just how bad your migraines got to you but he’d just been so stressed with work and he’d been hearing people complain about how sick they were, too sick to help him edit the album and he snapped. It was wrong and he was going to make it up to you every second of every day for the rest of his life if you let him.

“Yn, I’m sorry.” You and Felix’s heads snapped in his direction and you quickly looked down at your hands on the bed, you didn't want to face him right now or for a while at least. It pained you to think of everything he'd said back at home,

“What happened?” Chan asked you but you refused to even look at him so Felix stepped in, clearing his throat as he told Chan everything that the doctors had told him.

“She passed out at work and fell down a flight of stairs,” Felix explained and you grimaced a little. You'd just made it inside the building and got to your floor before passing out, part of you was thankful it wasn't in the street since that would have been even more embarrassing. 

“What?!” Chan's eyes widened as he stared at you, searching for any signs of broken bones or injuries but you were just laid in bed with an IV in your arm.

“She’s fine, her migraine is worse so they're treating her with acetaminophen and she has a sprained ankle but it could have been a lot worse.” It could have been, Right now you would have given anything to still be passed out so you didn’t have to face Chan but you knew it was inevitable.

“I’ll give you some time alone.” The door to your room slid shut and you slowly looked up to see your boyfriend looking at you with tears in his eyes.

“I’m sorry-” Chan tried to say but you didn't want to hear it,

“Save it.” You hissed out, staring at him as he shook his head as if he was trying to find the words to say.

“But I am, I’ve just been-”

“Stressed?” You finished with a scoff, you wanted to shake your head but any movement you made honestly made you feel as though you were going to fall over again. 

“I’ve heard the same excuse time and time again Chan and it’s getting harder for me to forgive every time,” Your voice cracked as you got the words out and Chan sat on the chair beside your bed, holding your hand in his as he ran his fingers over your skin.

“I was spiteful and rude. I took out my anger from everyone else on you and it’s not fair.” He admitted,

“True.” You mumbled as he lifted your hand to his lips and softly placed a kiss on your skin, smiling weakly as he thought about it. There were going to be no words he could even express to tell you how sorry he was,

“Everyone at work had been calling in sick when they were fine and I just snapped. It was wrong and nasty but I just-”

“Let the dame break and I was collateral damage?” You mumbled bitterly before looking at him and he nodded at you slowly.

“And I will do everything I can to make it up to you.” You smirked a little at the thought of what you could get out of him and he watched you closely,

“Spoiler for the new album?”

“Anything but that.” He groaned, you knew he would never be allowed to no matter how much you begged.

“Take me home?” You knew he was sorry for what he’d said and it was still going to take a while before you got over it but all you wanted right now was to go home and be in his arms.

“I’ll talk to your doctor.” He whispered before gently kissing the top of your head and walking out of the room to go and find someone who knew your case.

Since coming home from the hospital Chan had been a completely different person toward you, work was wiped completely from his mind and he had been caring for you every second of the day. The night you'd come home from the hospital he'd run you a bath but used a baby thermometer to check that the water wasn't too hot for you to get into and wouldn't let you bathe alone.

The whole time he'd been there, he'd washed your body for you and helped make sure your hair didn't get wet. After that, he'd taken you to bed where he got you a warm hot water bottle to place on your ankle and changed it to ice whenever he needed to.

Now was no different, besides the fact that you felt completely fine and well enough to go back to your normal day-to-day business.

“You know I feel fine now right?” You asked as Chan tucked you into a blanket on the sofa and placed a hot drink on the table that was within arm's reach of you. 

“I just want to make sure.” He mumbled as he pushed play on your comfort film and went to go and get his own hot drink.

“Chan, the doctor gave me the all-clear four days ago.” you reminded him but he pouted at you in response making you giggle at him. You knew he was sorry for the way he had treated you and this was one of the only ways he was able to make it up to you so you were doing your best to let him.

“I love you,” You told him as he cuddled up under the blanket with you, holding your hand before squeezing it softly.

“I love you too.” He whispered, holding you close to him not wanting to let you go for even a second.

@chiisaiblog @sw33tnight @kaitieskidmore97 @laylasbunbunny @stayconnecteed @saymyspringrain @toplinehyunjin @katnisspeetaprim @acciocriativity @wolfgurl2600 @just-aelia @choisoorin@straykids5star @minholythighs @midnightfrog625 @beccaskz @compersian @scarletemeterio @alicejustwakeup @halesandy @junhannies @gothic4under4lord @lixie-phoria @soulphoenix1618 @aerastus @jin-from-the-block @peachyproductions @lenfilms @elizaschuyler18 @piratequeen-impact @kpopmenace143 @minhosify @loveforred @kpopstuffs @chaeyoungs @delulu18 @stzatzch @b1nn1e-1s-cut3

[writingforatwistedworld]

Hii, I'm glad you're back . Even if it was for a few days you really left a place in tumblr not just for your work but for your presence itself.

I had a question for a while and I'm sorry if you answered it before and I seemed to not notice , if that's the case then forgive my ignorance but I was wondering , since sebek seems to respect his grandfather alot and has inherited the hate for humans from him and it's a known fact in self-aware au that the faes 'love' the overseer alot I must say.. does that mean that sebek also inherited his 'love' for the overseer from his granpa? If so how did green grandpa see the overseer, what made him 'love' them and how does he show it .

If you don't want to write this then feel free to ignore it , hope you have a great day and don't forget to drink water and eat well<33

Hi there Anon. It's so sweet of you to say that. I didn't think I would have made such an impression on anyone. But I completely forgot to write about Sebeks grandfather -_-

Well, better late than never.

Self-aware au

WARNINGS: Jp-version spoiler (like, the whole thing!!!), (Platonic!) yandere themes, war, religion, unhealthy mindset, isolation, unhealthy family dynamic

(Platonic!) Yandere headcanons

Ah yes, our local way too loud and loyal member of the reptilian family. No need to to worry about him. I mean, what could go wrong? (Hehe…)

Baul was not from the Valley of Thorns. Growing up in Sunset Savannah he did not grow up with the beliefs of the Faes (in other words, he was not part of a religious cult)

So imagine the huge shock he felt when he finally became a solider under the Draconia banner and started to become more and more like the other Faes

Well, for starters, yes, he wasn't indoctrinated into the whole church thing since birth but also wasn't raised to see you as an equal like the beastmen of the Savannah

You could say that he was a healthy mixture of both

Emphasis on the “was”

You see, isolation and being the only one sticking out (if we discount the humans invading the valley) does leave you open for a lot of things

If we count two (being the surroundings he was in) and two (his more or less unnoticed loneliness) together, we can see pretty fast where that led

Never mind his superior (and friend I mean come on they might as well be brothers) Lilia constantly rambling about the Overseer, savior of all, and how you accepted everyone in your kind embrace

Ok. Nice. Neat. Great. In the beginning, Baul wasn't very interested in joining any kind of religion

But the longer the war held on, the more he wished there was someone he could ask for help in his task of protecting those he deemed close to himself (you see the generational pattern?)

At some point, even the proudest of all can't hold on for forever

So he turned to you, the supposed God that was on so gentle

And goddamn that religious gaslighting and placebo effect worked damn well

Not only did he feel like there was someone there who supported him from somewhere in the universe (even though that was just him believing too much but let have him have some hope, ok?) but also he finally had a community

Whenever he would leave one of the many churches in the valley a Fae would approach, thanking him for protecting their home

Sooner than later did the former non-believer think of himself as your chosen shield of the valley

The war came and went away

If only the same thing could be said about Bauls new religious beliefs

And when he saw that grandson of his, cute little chubby hands that gripped a wooden toy sword tightly, he knew that his position as the valleys shield would not cease

Yes, even Baul would die one day. Fae or not, he was at the end of the day mortal

But that talent of his grandson would surely be of use to you, right?

If his younger self would see him like this, would it run away? Would it feel disgust at the thought that his future self would use his own grandson for selfish, religious reasons?

If only Baul knew that “God” didn't even know they were living beings that existed in a different world…

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

book 5 part 6 thoughts!!

***THIS POST CONTAINS MASSIVE SPOILERS FOR BOOK 7 PART 6 OF THE MAIN STORY!!***

If you’d like to watch a rough part-by-part summarized translation, please check out this archived stream!

Please note: this is NOT meant to be a summary or a translation; these are only my initial thoughts on the events that unfold. There may be details overlooked or misunderstood in this post, so PLEASE do not use this as a translation.

Ew, we're starting off with another map segment... TWST REALLY WANTS TO TIMEGATE OUR TEARS, HUH

Yuu and gang are going to follow the night fae soldiers to Black Scale Castle beyond the mountains. They can't stay too far from the owner of the dream, Lilia! (If you'll remember, they're now taking Tamago-sama there for safety while Meleanor stays behind to fight the Silver Owls.)

Silver hasn't seen Sebek use his UM??? Sebek tells us he learned his UM when Silver got into NRC and Sebek was training by himself. He wanted to be able to rush to Malleus's side at a moment's notice. He knows it is able to turn his own body into lightning and then can use it to move and to attack. However, the spell will damage his body while using it since he has yet to reach mastery. Sebek can't use his magic to rush to Lilia and the others because he wouldn't be able to fight by the time he does.

... ISN'T HIS UM SIMILAR TO ROLLO'S.... JUST TRADE FIRE FOR LIGHTNING...

AW, SEBEK WASN'T PLANNING ON USING HIS SPELL UNTIL HE MASTERED IT... BUT HE STILL USED IT TO SAVE SILVER 😭

Oh, they finally asked the question we were all having. If Malleus made this dream with the intention of it being a happy ending, then why do only sad things happen in Lilia's dream??? Also, why did OB Malleus not come after them yet or kick them out of the dream??? Maybe there's a reason why Malleus can't supervise or enter Lilia's dream??

BAUL LEFT THEM MAGIC TO GUIDE THEM THE RIGHT WAY... HE TRUSTS US TO HELP THEM NOW

Baul fights with an axe. IS HE ABOUT TO HAND IT OVER TO SEBEK (Sebek seems to be holding one in his limited time card)????

Lilia "I won't forgive you if you die!" Vanrouge.

Not both grandpa and grandson volunteering to stay behind to fight and then catch up later... Sebek tells Silver to go ahead and protect Lilia, "You go and protect what is most precious to you. I'm going to protect what is precious to me," (Sebek about Baul) 😭 The night fae are so confused why a human would willingly help them... THI S IS SEBEK'S CHARACTER ARC

SEBEK PROVES HIMSELF A CAPABLE FIGHTER TO HIS GRANDPA!! His hair gets all messy like what's shown in his new SSR. It's raining as well (like in the card art), so this is likely the context for the illustration. The groovy artwork is of Sebek being knighted!!!

adgkuvaodv8yfefvyyeft8wen Sebek makes a big speech about wanting to be their strength!! BAUL ACKNOWLEDGES SEBEK BY NAME INSTEAD OF "HUMAN" AND GRANTS HIM A SOLDIER'S UNIFORM, SEBEK'S BEING OFFICIALLY KNIGHTED FOR THE BRIAR COUNTRY'S IMPERIAL GUARD AND GIVEN A NEW WEAPON... BAUL EVEN GIVES SEBEK HIS OWN CROCODILE MASK

Zigvolt family lore!! Baul doesn't get along with his human son-in-law, but never distanced himself from his grandchildren. When Baul's only daughter wanted to marry a human, they argued so much about it. To this day, he still doesn't particularly care for humans. Even so, Baul's house has a lot of storybooks and candy prepared for his mixed grandchildren. He won't open them warmly, but it's clear he loves his family.

Silver saves Lilia!! And then Lilia asks Silver to take the egg to Black Scale Castle in his place. There are too many human soldiers on their trail, and Lilia cannot fight them while holding the egg (plus he's already injured from previously protecting Silver at the easternmost fortress).

Yuu has to hold Tamago-sama...

Silver proceeds to carry Lilia like a baby in spite of Lilia saying he'd stay behind and distract the Silver Owls 🤡 NOT SILVER USING LILIA'S OWN TEACHINGS TO TELL DREAM!LILIA THEY STILL HAVE TO TRY AND SURVIVE

The mountains are called the "Forbidden Mountains" and it is said that this is where Maleficent once lived. If you are not blessed by the dragons, the lightning (according to legend) will strike you down. Beyond the mountain is Briar Country's capital city and Black Scale Castle.

Surprisingly, Silver suggests an ambush method (hide and strike at soldiers from behind when they've let their guard down). I guess NRC really did teach him how to be backhanded after all/j

Silver says maybe Malleus can't follow them since he wasn't born yet in Lilia's dream. Magic relies on imagination, and since Malleus cannot imagine what life was like before he was born... that's probably why he can't monitor these circumstances.

Would you look at that 💀 The first real time the story acknowledges that Yuu is in bodily danger; Silver Owls shoot arrows at Yuu because they're holding the egg. Grimmu protects us!! Baby... Best buddy...

SEBEK ARRIVING TO SAVE SILVER (aksldnbaksdbaydasl lol at Sebek being smug about his knighting and trying to act cool even though the lightning is definitely still hurting him...)

Silver Owls retreat!

Oh wow, so they see creeping black thorns similar to when Malleus OB'd; everyone suspects that maybe Meleanor Overblotted too.

Silver mentions that he lives near the Forbidden Mountains but has never climbed them before. The rocks there are very sharp and dangerously jut out. AW, Lilia gives Silver and Yuu his cloak to protect them from the rain and cold. Lilia says the mountain range is full of magic, so its restorative to fae, who draw power from nature.

The way they came from was sealed off by rocks... but Lilia fully intends to go back and help Meleanor...

THEY MADE IT TO THE CASTLE!! It's called Maleficia's castle; we have an official English spelling for Granny Draconia's name. Something, something, Lilia wants to prepare something called the "Cradle Tower".

WE CUT BACK TO WILD ROSE CASTLE

Like father, like son... The Dawn Knight seems remorseful and wonders where they went wrong, if everyone could have been friends if they had chosen some other way. He wants to dream of a world where all races can live together in peace. "One day, it won't be just a dream, it will be reality." It's phrased very similarly to the wish Lilia made in Wish Upon a Star!

The stormy weather clears up and the dawn makes way... IT'S A SIGN THAT THE DAWN KNIGHT PREVAILED AND MELEANOA'S MAGIC HAS DISAPPEARED... Lilia just lets out the most guttural cries... He says if he were stronger, he would have taken Meleanoa with him against her will, HE WASN'T ABLE TO KEEP HIS PROMISE TO PROTECT MELEANOR FOR HIM

I still want to see Mallemom's on-screen death though.

Side note: they force us to play through a scripted loss battle between the Dawn Knight and Meleanor 💀 Sick fucks on the dev team…

This is delicious content :)))))))) We're eatin' well, boiz

Uhhh okay so there are greenish spirits floating around; they're the senate??? Apparently they've already died but their spirits linger and serve as advisors.

… Idk why doesn’t Mallemom do this too???

NAUR, NOT THE SENATE BLAMING AND SHAMING LILIA, SAYING HE RAN AWAY AND LEFT HER TO DIE IN BATTLE... THEY CALL LILIA A MUTT AND BAT, JUST A DIRTY ORPHAN WHO CAN’T BE TRUSTED… AND THAT HE ISN'T FIT TO SERVE, THAT HE'S USELESS (this must really sting seeing as Lilia has insecurities about not being wanted 😭)

Baul defends Lilia's honor but Lilia still resigns from the Imperial Guard. HE'S TELLING THE SENATE T HEY CAN PUNISH HIM SO THEY FORBID HIM FROM STEPPING INTO THE CAPITAL AGAIN

The senate uses magic to take the egg away from Lilia AND LILIA SAYS GOODBYE TO MALLEUS BY NAME

"I'm not an Imperial Guard anymore, I don't need to follow orders" — Lilia (when Baul tells Lilia he still has a duty to hatch the egg). LILIA HAS GIVEN UP and that seems to have summoned the darkness of the dream to them. Lilia thinks Meleanor and/or Levan are in the darkness so he wants to "go there too".

When a general retires, they are gifted a lavish home near Black Scale Castle. Sebek says it now makes sense why Lilia lived humbly in a forest cottage far away from the capital. Silver says it must be why Lilia dislikes the atmosphere of the capital and why he never took Silver there.

In a flashforward, Lilia is asked to come back 10 years later. At this point, Tamago-sama has developed more sentience and is actively rejecting the love magic from everyone, even his grandmother. He has only been receiving magic for the first 5ish years or so. Maleficia had Baul act as a messenger to bring Lilia back for a special mission BECAUSE OTHERWISE MALLEUS WILL DIE WITHOUT IT.

Malleus’s egg is being kept in Cradle Tower! It keeps the egg safe and essential incubates it for the royal family.

Land of Briar becomes Briar Valley? The queen cannot always be with the egg because Briar Valley and its surrounding are lands are left in chaos after the war. Briar Valley fae specifically are not allowed in human territories.

Lilia is sent off on to find a way to fix the situation. He says he will see where dragons live in other continents and research. Omg, this must be how he started his travels and learned more about other races and their cultures 😭

“Don’t you dare die, Malleus” — Lilia (AND THE LOVING DEATH THREAT ACTUALLY MAKES THE EGG GLOW)

We see some of Lilia’s travels AND HE WAS IN THE CITY OF FLOWERS ON TOPSY TURVY DAY... The people there were friendly at first and worrying for his health until they realize he's a fairy, then they chase him out.

During one of his routine reports, Lilia is convinced by Baul to speak with Malleus's egg (which now glows green sometimes). Lilia shares stories of his travels with Malleus, trying to keep it positive for the baby to not make Malleus sad.

NEXT LILIA TRAVELED TO THE SCALDING SANDS, A MERCHANT IS ASKING IF HE WANTS TO BUY A MAGIC LAMP... Lilia learns about the importance of souvenirs as keepsakes from that merchant.

Okay, so it looks like between travels we're getting scenes of Lilia reporting back and telling Malleus about the place he most recently visited. He says that the Scalding Sands used to be such a small civilization but has since grown into a sprawling city. It's amazing what kind of progress humans can make.

Malleus is fussy and some days accepts magic, and other days he doesn't. Meleanor was also a really picky eater. Levan carries himself like an honors student but was the type to hide his veggies.

AW, HE SINGS MELEANOR'S LULLABY TO MALLEUS

Next Lilia visits some ruins...? It looks like a background from the Spectral Realm seen in Endless Halloween Night. Lilia says no one lives here, there is only furniture. No ghosts are mentioned though! He uses his UM for the first time here. Far Cry Cradle is probably going to be very useful for investigating ways to hatch a dragon's egg!

Lilia tells Malleus to come out of the egg, it must be boring just sleeping. He offers to read stories and change his diaper, tells Malleus his dad wants to meet him. Oh, and of course Lilia shares about his UM too! He tells Malleus that he went to the Land of Crimson Long.

Lilia ventures to Harveston!! An old man mistakes Lilia for a kid and takes him in, showing him warmth and kindness. He says he'll leave soon, but the old man and an old woman say he should stay until spring because the weather is harsh.

The lady notices Lilia is fae (but since time has passed, relations between fae and humans have improved a bit). No one is afraid of him here!! They apologize for mistaking him as a kid and want to share stories.

(Not confirmed but it could be interesting if these were Epel’s ancestors Lilia met… Rollo’s ancestors can be the ones running Lilia out of the City of Flowers www)

ABSHDBYOAFVYFAIAEUQRQEOUBFQ LILIA IS 430 AT THIS POINT BUT THAT NUMBER IS SO CLOSE TO 420 IT MAKES ME LAUGH

His feelings are changing... At 450 years old, Lilia tells Malleus that the world has changed so much and he has had the chance to visit many places. ahbyoaybadadB APPARENTLY PEOPLE USED TO THROW STONES AND ROCKS AT HIM.

Lilia says that fae may become things of the past, just creatures of fairy tales. But he doesn't want Malleus to be the main character of a fairy tale, forgotten by time. He wants Malleus to be able to see the world his parents weren’t able to see for themselves 😔

Another time skip, and it's come to a point where the egg is in critical condition. For 3 whole months it has been rejecting Maleficia's magic. The egg has since erected a lightning barrier to protect itself, even though its own heartbeat is growing weaker and weaker. (Malleus throwing another tantrum lol)

Lilia heard weird sounds but no one else could??? Is that a baby crying???? He tries to approach, but almost gets struck down many times.

Lilia realizes Malleus is crying because he's lonely. "Wait for me. I'm coming to you right now!" He gets hit by lightning, but perserves!

Lilia says he will offer his magic, even his lifespan (many fan theorists squealed now that this is confirmed), to Malleus if he needs it, and finally embraces the egg. (Physical contact like holding the egg is said to encourage magic absorption.)

TAMAGO-SAMA??????? 😭 HE SOUNDS LIKE A POKEMON… and he’s already blowing fire even though he’s freshly hatched???

WTF THOUGH BABY MALLEUS IS 1000000000000000000000x CUTER THAN GROWN UP MALLEUS 🫶 (I don’t like modern day Malleus’s looks at all www)

Silver understands why the dream is how it is, because it was all worth it for Lilia to finally meet Malleus. The moment of hatching has to be the happiest moment in Lilia’s life.

The senate shows up and starts praising Lilia as a hero.

OH????? Lilia seems to be waking????

HMMMM? this implies there’s limited suspension of disbelief each dreamer has 🤔 and if pushes past that threshold, then the dreamer is in a confused half awake state. Idia had these little moments of questioning his dream’s reality as well.

The senate’s voices distort, and they start shouting at Lilia for touching the prince, how it will be a scandal if a bat (… is Lilia a bat fae???) “dirties” the Draconias, etc. Mmmm, maybe this is the real reaction and the praising was part of the dream?? Since Lilia seemed to react strangely to being extolled. (I’m still over here wondering why their opinions hold so much weight compared to the queen; surely she would invite her friend Lilia back?? And doesn’t seem to blame him for the death of her daughter?)

Levan has a voice similar to Malleus, but lacks horns.

DVSUBILADUP9FFQEQFFAHAFBFEYBN OB MALLEUS JUMPSCARE, HE FINALLY MANAGED TO BREAK THROUGH INTO LILIA'S DREAM

Okay 😭 Lilia did in fact use his own life span so Malleus could hatch, and then Lilia had Maleficia swear to secrecy because he was concerned Malleus would blame himself. But it also feels like the senate purged or edited the records to hide the fact that Malleus hatched with Lilia’s love??

Malleus tries to convince Lilia to go back to sleep, to not feel pain. He says he can give Lilia a dream where the Draconias are still alive, a dream where Lilia can live peacefully, just take Malleus’s hand—

SILVER COMING IN CLUTCH, he and Sebek vow to break Malleus’s “blessing”. It’s this word that allows Lilia to fully awaken!!! ⏰ He’s so proud of Silver and Sebek…

They fight (well, Lilia distracts Malleus), then Silver uses his UM to hop into another dream.

They run into Ortho?! And then everyone is dropped off in front of Ignihyde.

FINALLY, SHROUD BROTHERS RETURN RIGHT AT THE VERY END!! I was wondering what they were doing while all this shit went down in Lilia's dream... It sounds like the next book 7 update will start off with Idia and Ortho, most likely told via flashback. I assume Ortho was able to help Idia wake up somehow?

This update felt like we got a lot of new lore!! But many of the events that played out were things we already had an inkling about prior to all of this (Meleanor dying, Lilia going on his travels eventually, Lilia helping Malleus hatch, etc.). It's nice to get the confirmation and to have the gaps of time inbetween filled in.

I really appreciate the story showing us just how hard Lilia's life was and then showing us just how important a nugget of happiness after all of that was so worth it for that moment. His VA did a stellar job with the voice acting this update, particularly the sobbing once Malleus hatched. I loved seeing Lilia's travels and how they gradually affected his own mindset over time... how he learned many different things from the people he encountered, and how he passed on that knowledge onto Malleus.

I liked seeing the origins of Lilia’s UM (he’s on a journey to find an answer)! Hearing about Sebek’s was also interesting; seeing as he’s a late bloomer with his magic and how he’s always competing with Silver, his UM manifested when Silver had been admitted to NRC and Sebek was training alone. I wonder if the UM also (in part) rose out of a feeling of inadequacy or feeling like he has to “catch up” to where Silver, Malleus, and Lilia are. No matter how hard it may be, he wants to push past his limits and serve as a knight. Maybe that, too, is why his UM prioritizes power and speed at his own body’s expense. It’s great seeing Sebek open up a little more and insist on fighting alongside fae; in modern day, Sebek has had to fight alongside humans. This is bridging the two sides of himself and helping him to reconcile with his own prejudices 😭

THE WHOLE DRAMA WITH THE SENATE MAKES ME UNDERSTAND WHY LILIA DROPPED THAT LINE ABOUT HISTORY BEING ALTERED OR REWRITTEN. It all makes so much sense now... Lilia himself (at least him hatching Malleus) was written out of history even though he did so much to help his country. He was so disliked, shunned, and shown animosity from the powers that be, and now he doesn't wish for that to happen to others, especially not to Malleus, the one good thing in his life and all that remained of the friends he lost along the way. You really see his teachings coming through in Silver and Sebek when they face off against OB Malleus towards the end. And the way I screeched when Lilia finally woke up after that...

The more I see OB Malleus, the more I get this skin-crawling feeling around him. I know the other OB boys have done arguably worse things (attempted murder, for example) but there's something so awful and insidious about the way Malleus speaks. He's intentionally gaslighting and manipulating others to just give in to his control, taking advantage of even Lilia at his lowest moments to dominate his thoughts. That's scary to think about... especially the dark inversion of Malleus urging Lilia to take his hand, when the game started off with a much more light-hearted and inviting "take my hand" offer.

Anyway!! I've been wondering for a long time what the Shrouds have been up to, and I'm so excited to see their story next update!!

[barleyo]

Prom Queen. (Re-upload)

Real Dad! Leon Kennedy X F! Reader (smut)

A/N: tumblr took this down. I'm re-uploading it because idgaf. No tags because I'm lazy, read at your own risk. Obviously reader is of age, and obviously, if you DON'T LIKE what I write, DON'T READ what I write, thanks :3

DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT AHEAD

You had always dreamed about your senior prom. Even as a young girl, you thought exhaustively about how the night would go. You would wear a gorgeous gown, drink spiked punch, dance and laugh with friends, and most importantly, you would go with a cute boy.

Those dreams fell flat when your strict father outlawed prom for you. He said that prom was just an opportunity for hyped up, hormonal teens to gyrate on each other on school property. Prom was a night where girls opened their legs for their subpar dates who barely made the effort to scrounge up a corsage for them. Prom was the chance for unwanted, "happy accident" babies to be made by teenaged fuck-ups.

In short, prom was for whores. Leon would be damned if he would have a nasty whore of a daughter. It made him sick to even think of you wasting your sweet, nearly virginal body on a shit-for-brains boy whose only sexual experience no doubt came from his own right hand.

So, yeah. Prom was a nonstarter.

Of course, this angered you to no end. You could be heard sobbing each night after Leon's declaration of war on you having any fun was drawn up, but a small part of you thought it was the best.

You knew that prom wasn't like how it was shown in the movies. You wouldn't get an invitation from the hottest boy in school, you wouldn't get there in a decked out limo, and the punch would be lukewarm and watered down at best.

You wouldn't dance: you would have no one to dance with. You would sit alone at one of the tables eating fun sized candy bars aimlessly scattered on the repurposed lunch room tables in your school's gymnasium, while a horde of your peers would dance nasty on each other, being free and young.

The whole time, nobody would look at you, aside from the sly glance paired with a snicker shared between two gossiping teens, indulging in the rumors that floated around about you.

Nobody would want to dance with the girl who had an overprotective daddy that fucked her. Especially when that girl liked it.

The more you thought about it, the more you came to peace with the idea of staying in with Leon. Technically, being demanded to stay at home with him meant that you were sort of, kind of asked on a "date" with a hot guy, even if you shared DNA with said hot guy.

On the day of the dance, Leon had the decency to let you skip school. You sulked in bed the entire day, thinking about what could have been, rather than what was. He did not bother you, having enough sense to let a sleeping dog lay, but at exactly 10:00 PM , you felt your phone ding under your pillow.

'Come downstairs. Wear a dress. Not one of your church ones.'

His texts were always sharp and to the point, just like he was. Commanding. Strict.

You, as always, obliged. You put on one of his favorites, the one that always left his eyes lingering on your body a little too long. As you made your way down the stairs, you heard the faint sound of romantic music playing in the living room, which you naturally followed like a trail of breadcrumbs.

"Dad, what's all this?"

Your living room looked like a scene stripped from a cheesy romance movie. Rose petals scattered on the floor, lights dimmed low, and a tall, hot stud in the midst of it all. Your father's face was stern, but past that you could see the inkling of excitement in him.

"Your prom. I know it meant a lot to you," he said gruffly, adjusting the collar of the nice shirt he wore, "so I did what I could. Hope this'll make you forgive me."

Your feet pattered softly against the cool flooring, bringing your body along with them. You took a final look around the room and let your eyes lock onto your dad.

"I do. S'okay, I'm not mad at you, daddy."

How could you ever be mad at him? Your perfectly stubborn, grouchy, yet sexy father? Your father who—

"You know I just want the best for you, right peach?" Leon grasped you in his arms, snaking both arms around your lower waist while he rested his chin on your head. "Just wanna keep you safe."

"I know."

You both stood like that for a moment, neither speaking. The soft sound of the music slowly playing in the background was the only noise filling your sense. Well, that and the husky sound of your father's breathing. And his manly, leathery scent. His strong hands placed on your body, too.

You heard him clear his throat briefly and snapped to give him your attention, something you found yourself doing often. He liked when you listened to him quickly, made him feel respected.

"May I have this dance?" Leon asked, giving you a rare smirk when you nodded.

One of his hands stayed on your waist, while the other took your hand gently and clasped it in the air, leading you into a sweet waltz. With each step, he guided you with rigid, calculated movements. His movements were neat, as if he had been planning every moment of your shared dance.

The longer you danced with him, the closer your bodies pressed together, creating a faint friction between the two of you. In that moment, any negative emotion you had felt before faded away, leaving only the image of him in your mind.

Leon knew your signs. He'd spent a long time decoding them, and the look on your face was one he read easily. With a tilt of his head, he leaned in, a soft chuckle escaping his lips when he felt your increased heartbeat against his chest.

You made the first real move, pushing your tongue deeper into his mouth. Kisses were the only time he let you take on a dominant role. He thought it was cute, feeling your smaller tongue fuck into his mouth like you were in charge. Not wanting to spoil your fun, he softly guided you backwards to the wall, giving him a surface to work with.

"You're a bold one, I'll give you that," he said, breaking the kiss. "Can't ever actually ask for what you want, but you go wild once you get it, don't you?"

You hummed, letting him pull you up and wrap your legs around his waist. His hand slid under your dress and pushed it up, giving him a view of your panties.

"God, you're soaked. So wet f'me." Leon stuck his fingers in his mouth, slurping on them and covering them with spit before he forced them past the band of your underwear. Tight, quick circles were made around your clit, denying you of any time to think. "Nobody else can play with this, you hear me? This is all mine, you don' let anybody else have you," his voice was a warm whisper that fanned across your ear.

"I promise, 'm all yours. Don't want anyone else, only you, daddy," you swore desperately, meaning every word even if it sounded like you were just babbling on.

"Fuckin' slut." He spit a fat glob onto his fingers and spread it around your cunt, lubing you up. "Thought I raised a sweet girl. Bet you act like this for the boys at school too, huh?" Your panties were slid to the side.

His teeth clenched together jaggedly as he prodded the tip of his cock at you entrance, drawing in a deep breath when he pushed it fully in.

"No, never! I don't want any of them, just want you. They aren't good enough."

"Yeah? Greedy little cunt only wants her daddy, is that right?" The ego boost he was getting from this ran through him immediately. He wound your clit up with his thumb, quickly zigzagging on the little bud to match his thrusts. "Good. They don't deserve to feel you—"

You cunt fluttered around his length at his words, leaving him biting down on his lip.

"Just like that. Gonna make me cum if you keep that up, baby."

Your mouth hung open, pathetic mewls leaking from it. Each sound he drew out of you was nearly pornographic. He bullied your guts and hit deep, far deeper than your fingers ever could, and left you far more needy than your digits did.

"Inside this time?" You had wanted it so bad for the longest time, and instead he would pull out of you and coat your soft tummy or the fat of your ass with his ropes. "I need to feel it, please. I don't wanna be empty again, jus' fill me up," you slurred, drool spilling from the corner of your plush mouth.

"Yeah," he huffed, nodding along with you words, ready to finally jump at the opportunity, "yeah, inside. I need it too, baby, you have no idea. Daddy wants to spoil you real bad, he wants to give you all the babies you want."

Your lower body tensed, squeezing him tightly as the familiar rhythmic pattern of your orgasm set in. It felt so right in that moment, like your body was made for this exact purpose: being a warm hole for your dad to fill with his hot cum.

"Ready?" He said it more like a demand than a question, and within seconds he was creaming into you, still pounding your cunt like he hated you. "Take it, don't spill."

He kept his dick sheathed away inside of you, hoping that if he kept most of his cum in you, it would take. His brow was slick with sweat and his face was flushed. He had never looked so attractive before.

You ran your hand through his hair to get his attention. When he darted his eyes up to you, you mumbled something about wanting to go again.

"Anything for you baby. Night's still young, isn't it? We got time."

[neonovember]

Coming in HOT with some ANGST and FLUFF, having SUCH an intense emotional fight with Carmen one night. Maybe you’re both arguing about the opening of The Bear or finances or even just with communication in your relationship, Carmen just snaps about how you weren’t always this hostile. Just losing it on him and in tears crying out “YOU LEFT!! YOU LEFT ME CARMEN!! I understand what happened with you and your brother, but you just fucking left and didn’t even say goodbye!! You know how AWFUL that made me feel?! Like all of a sudden after everything we’d been through! It was like suddenly I was another face you just cut out and forgot about. It took me MONTHS to stop even just thinking about you. And then when you came back? It was as if nothing happened, but I was SO happy you were back….and now you always act like I’m some inconvenience that’s always in the way!!!! So what do you WANT Carmen?! Do you want me to stay or is this another New York situation?”. You can see Carmen’s heart shattering in his face as he just crumbles at the end begging for forgiveness 🥲. It ends maybe with the both of you holding each other in the kitchen “I’m so sorry” “No no….it’s okay….I shouldn’t have taken it out on you like that…”

All for you

this request was so good! your brain anon..😍 i hope i did it justice, this is part one of two because i always seem to be extending things that should be a one shot! i'm thinking part two should be from carm's pov? what do you guys think??

warnings: shouting, self deprecation, angst to the tenth power, no happy endings, carmen is so so so bad at communicating, unresolved tension/anger, new york carmy!

Loving Carmen was a lot of things. 

It was the smoulder of colours brushed onto a canvas, it was the crash of waves in the middle of the pacific, fighting and thrashing against each other until it took you under and below. It was the spoonful of honey that eased the bitterness, it was beyond your control. A love so smouldering and bright that you didn't quite know if your heart could fit it all.

But it was also difficult, like dragging a 50 pound steel anchor every way you went. You were forever grateful to have Carmen in your life, again at least, but it wasn’t exactly like the things that he had struggled with before he wasn't struggling with even more now. 

You were patient, you tried to be at least. When he wouldn’t pick up your calls for hours, when he was so caught up with work he forgot to eat, when he was so caught up with work all the last of his energy was spent on you and not himself.

You loved Carmen too hard to let him destroy himself for his work, even if he hated you for it, you couldn't watch him crumble and break from the stress of the restaurant and the overwhelming pressure he put on himself. 

Especially when you saw him begin to unravel before you, melting hot wax crackling and setting form. He had begun to throw back bottles of pepto like it was water, crunching on tums like popcorn any chance he got, and it wasn't like the restaurant was doing bad, in fact it was doing amazing. Yet, it was that fact alone that made Carmen get worse, made him slip into the sinking black hole that told him one moment away from the shop, one glance off of his work and it would crumble into ash.

You had seen this in New York, where he would call you during the depths of the night, the sound of his stuttered sobs breaking any resolve you had left. You had raced to throw on a jacket and bring a pot of soup to his place even when he protested. You fed him whilst he shook against you, you whispered stories until he fell asleep, you kissed his curls.

You wondered if he knew.

You find yourself doing the same thing now, like an endless dance you both are bound to, every rational part of you wants to hate it but you can't deny the way your heart shimmers in want. Your mind moves with the familiarity of it, chasing after him like a game of cat and mouse.

Only this time you live with Carmen and not in a dingy shoebox in New York holding back every ounce of love you wanted to pour into him. 

Carmen’s mind was forever connected to food, it was something so automatic it fell unconscious under his skin. You found amusement in the way he’d stand in the middle of your apartment living room in quick critic over the late night cooking shows that you would turn on whilst waiting for him to come home, or the coffee around the corner he swears isn’t actual beans. 

But your soup, and anything else you made was something he had always reserved with a certain adoration. He’d whisper into the anonymity of your neck under the covers, recounting how your food was akin to a warm hug, coming home to the smell of cookies and a house of laughter and light he wished he had growing up.  

You hoped he had actually eaten something today, but it was that belief that evaded your mind as quickly as it came when you reminded yourself who Carmen was. It was push and pull, and you would be damned if he didn't finish your food and then some.

Your job allowed you to work from home, and you don’t know if it was your laziness or intelligence that enabled you to make it so that you only had to work a couple hours in the day. It was sometimes strange to Carmen, how you could be able to find love and creation in something without putting everything into it.

Carmen was always watching you, he found peace in it, the moves and motions of you all over the apartment, the scent of your body wash, you toothbrush next to his, you were a movie right in front of him and he would watch you for eternity if he could.

You turn into the back of the Bear, parking between the faded white lines before turning off the engine and staying in the car for a moment. You hated the cold, and your breath had already begun to blow out misty clouds every time you exhaled. Collecting the warm container of soup and a sandwich you quickly jog towards the restaurant, taking the back door when you notice Manny leaving.

“Hey Hun, how ya doing” Manny nods towards you with a warm smile

“Hey Manny, just coming to get Carmen to eat something other than tums” 

“Chef is definitely wound tight, mix up on a new delivery of some kind of fruit? Forgot the name.. It's spiky and smells like when we moved out those ovens and found those burnt onions and stock stuck to the floor” Manny replies with a wince as you both recall the devastating smell that hadn’t left your nostrils in weeks during the renovation.

“Uh, Durian?” You reply and Manny clicks his fingers at your reply.

“That's it. That mind of yours is really something. He hasn’t taken a break since the morning, but you always have a way with him” Manny raises his eyebrows and you shake your head with a laugh

You only remember that particular fruit because Carmen had been obsessing over a new menu item that included it as its main component. He had spent sleepless nights perfecting it, despite it being utterly magnificent the first try. You couldn’t shake him from his work, it could consume him for months if he let it, and you feared he was at the precipice of falling into that hole once again.

You walk through the back hallway leading up to the main kitchen, passing by the tired hunches of the shoulder dressed down in crisp white shirts and aprons. The Bear had a late start today, Sydney suggested opening a little later for a full dinner menu rather than lunch as well and the turn out had shocked you all.

It also meant Carmen came home even later than he already did during those nights, you’ve had to damn near carry him to the bath to get him to not drop dead the second he came home. You didn’t mind however, you couldn't deny the faint thrum of your heart content as you washed Carmen’s hair whilst he lay against you half asleep. 

You spot Sydney at her station, and you quickly walk over to see her prepping for dinner, the swoop of her knife cutting into red meat in a kind of curve you knew she had perfected over the years.

“Hey Syd, early start?” You say, once your side by side with her

“Oh don’t remind me, can you believe the L got backed up from all the ice last night? Added a whole 45 minutes to my commute” Sydney groans out, shaking her head as she turns to you. Grateful to have a reprieve from her repetitive cutting.

“Goddam Chicago, if it makes you feel any better, I’ve got a bottle of wine with your name on it in my fridge and it is dying to be opened and shared by two very, very tired women” You reply, smiling at the way Sydney raises her eyebrows gleefully at the thought.

“I am holding you to that, as soon as we get through today. God, this new dish Carmen has thought up is kicking my ass” Sydney replies, and your ears chirp at the mention of the man you’ve been looking for.

“Speaking of Carmen, have you seen him?” 

“Yeah, I think he’s still in the office, been on call with one of our vendors cause of the mix up with the--”

“Durian, yeah. Thanks Syd” You reply, giving her a nod before making your way to the hallway leading into the office.

You hear Carmen before you see him, the sound of his loud voice seeping through the cracks of the door. His voice rises as he gets more and more agitated, and you don’t miss the sound of a cup being thrown against the wall as the phone call continues, not waiting a moment before firing back muffled words you can hardly make out except

“Unprofessional” “waste of my time” “fuckin’ dick”

So yeah, you thought it was definitely a good time to walk in and get your extremely agitated boyfriend to eat your soup.

Just as you walk through the door, you see Carmen slam the phone back onto the receiver, shouting out obscenities at the object as he throws his chair back onto the floor. Years working together has made you unfazed by his outbursts of anger, though you have been sly in trying to get him to go to therapy so that he doesn't get an aneurysm over the phone with the Wifi company or something hilariously trivial.

“Hey Carm” You say, whilst closing the door, and Carmen look up at you in surprise, his features sobering, as his eyes relax into a comforting gaze.

“Ah shit, sorry bout that, just some stubborn, pig headed vendors who don’t want to fix a problem they fucking caused” Carmen replies, his chest rising rapidly as he takes sharp inhales of oxygen. 

He turns to face you and you take in the sunken look of his cheeks, the skin a little discoloured like he was sick, and his hair dishevelled and falling flat against his face like he's run his hand through it too many times.

“Jesus Carmen, have you gotten any sleep?” You reply, instantly as you make your way over to him, pressing a hand on his shoulder.

Carmen shudders against your touch, shaking his head as he leans back and away from you. You stumble as you look down at your hand now inches away from his shoulder in confusion. Carmen never turned you away from him, in fact during those unforgiving times of anxiety and anguish, when he felt the entire sky falling, you would be his anchor to bring him back.

The fact that he had visibly shuddered when you touched him made your heart ache, and it hurts even more when Carmen notices, the guilt spilling into him.

“Just been so busy” Carmen replies, his eyes darting everywhere but you, as you nod with a tight smile, backing away from him.

You reach for the soup you've left on the edge, placing it on the desk and you nod to it

“Have you eaten today?” You reply and Carmen stops watching you, blinking slowly as he tries to remember the last time he's actually consumed something, before coming up empty and shaking his head up at you with a groan.

“I thought so, you need to eat Carmen, how can you expect to function let alone run a restaurant if you aren't at your optimal level” You reason, leaning against the table, with your arms crossed against your chest.

“It’s fine, I was just gonna grab something small” Carmen waves you off

“Actually, I brought you food right now so I think it would be a perfect time-

“Is that why you came? To micromanage me like some toddler” Carmen suddenly replies, his eyes narrowing as he looks at you through half lidded eyes.

“I- what? I didn’t-”

“I can run my restaurant blindfolded with my arms tied behind my back, alright? I don’t need you to come and patronise me like you know every goddamn thing” Carmen spits out, and you can't help the way your blood runs hot, the rhythmic beat of anger pounding through you like a hammer.

How fucking dare he

“Excuse me? I came here for you Carmen, not some self-righteous moment to say I'm better than you. God damnit, is that what you think? I came here to make sure you didn't faint and fall into a pot of boiling hot water” You spit out, Carmen looks up at you, hes blues swimming in ire as he lets a humour-less laugh rumble through his chest.

You felt all the things you had kept a lid on begin to tumble out of your mouth, and soon you’re anger morphed into a building current. The flashes of everything that had gone wrong, the lack of communication, the coming home late, it all has begun to accumulate rapidly and you let it consume you in its entirety. 

“Sure, of course,” Carmen sings. “I’m not your fucking child alright? You are my goddamn mother so stop treating me like you need to make sure I eat 3 times a day and have my nightly bath. I’m a grown man-”

“Then ACT LIKE IT!”

Carmen looks up at you in surprise, his brows knitting as his head swivels back from your outburst. You had never screamed at him, in fact, Carmen can’t remember a time where you had screamed at anyone like you did now as you stare him down deviantly. Eyes burning with a fiery anger that begged to be stoked. Carmen knows this, your hands shake in tight fists like your seconds away from swiping him, and he resorts back to his usual self destruction of turning back and running away. 

“Yeah, yeah that's right, walk away, walk away like you always do. Carmen, soon enough you're going to have to face it you know? You’re gonna have to face your fucking issues before it destroys us both” You scream, and Carmen pauses, causing you to stumble. Carmen turns around to face you in the middle of the hallway, the rush of anger present on his cheeks, causing the veins to bulge out on his neck and he looms over you

“Issues, I have fucking issues? You’re screaming at me because of goddamn soup”

“It’s more than fucking SOUP!” The screech of your voice bounced across the thin walls of the restaurant hallway, your throat begins to burn as you begin to swallow down the emotion bubbling within you. You want to reach into him and rattle his neck, force him to see the destructive path he was taking, force him to do anything but turn away and shut you out.

A quiet trepidation falls over the entire kitchen as they watch you both fight, it was unheard of, an anomaly that seemed wrong, like someone had gotten a couple from the street and put your faces on it.

Watching you both fight was like watching a performance. The way you both leaned into each other menacingly, neither of you backing down, there was an indefinite energy that bubbled between you both, you were seconds away from shocking each other or making out. 

“What is it then huh? Why are you acting like this? You expect me to read your goddamn mind? You’ve changed alright? Everyone can see it, I can't even recognise the person in front of me half the time” Carmen sneers, his neck turning a crimson red as he clenches his jaw painfully. He’s holding himself back, his body shakes with it, the tight clenches of his fist stopping him from putting a hole in the wall or smashing a chair.

“I’ve changed? Me?” You cut yourself off with a chuckle, Carmen shifted his gaze as his eyebrows knot in confusion, and when you catch a glimpse of his face you can’t help the booming sound from crawling up your throat, keening over as the sick sound of laughter rocks through your body.

The rest of the team now watches on in horror, you were laughing, why are you fucking laughing?

You try and gulp down the uncontrollable fit of laughter, you can practically feel your body shift down into the jagged memories from all those years ago. From a place and time you had shuffled into a no named cabinet and thrown into the deepest depths of the ocean. 

You didn’t want to remember, you begged your mind to forget, but as your laughter slips into sharp inhales, you already can taste the wetness streaming down your cheeks, and slithering down the slope of your neck.

Your sob’s rack through you, winding you until you hunched over, reaching out onto the wall to steady yourself and trying to find footing as the ground caves beneath you.

Carmen recognises it in an instant, taking a tentative step forward, raising his arms before dropping them in a second, like he was approaching a volatile animal.

“Fuck, I’m sorry I-” Carmen starts, but you’ve already raised yourself from your hunched position, the tears dripping into the linoleum floors and splashing onto your combat boots.

You didn’t want to face that time in your life again, but Carmen has practically forced you too, and there's no way in hell you weren’t going to drag him down into that bordered off well. Fuck being the bigger person.

“No no, you spoke, this is my fucking turn now” You grunt out, the rippling grief leaving your body in a flash as you sneer over him.

Carmen gulps back a retort, his mind re-circuiting, trying to figure out your polar behaviour. Carmen knew better to interrupt you now, in fact the restaurants was a pin drop quiet, safe for the whooshing sound of the central air corn, and the sound of Carmen's stuttering inhales.

“YOU listen to me” You spit, pointing a finger, pressing it into Carmen's chest so hard he stumbles back

“You fucking left me Carmen. You! You- just, you dropped everything we had, everything we ever built in New York and you disappeared. And it was Mickey, and you needed to be there and I got that, I get that, but you- you just left me there.” You grunt, biting back the swell of emotion that erupted when you thought about those years ago. 

“You became a ghost, and god,- you could have told me, after everything I thought we had- you could've told me! But then you didn't. And I was left to pick up the pieces, wondering if you had ever loved me, wondering if I should have given half of myself to you whilst you couldn't even call me back” You stutter out, shocking back the onslaught of tears as you swallow around the lump in your throat.

Carmen’s face pales as he registers those years ago in New York, the immediate look of guilt and anguish twisting his features as he leans onto the wall for support.

Even after all these years, all this time, you still felt it like it was yesterday. All your work had become undone, the thin veil of healing had been stripped back to bare bones in an instant, and you hate it, you hate it so much. Why couldn’t you have packed up and moved on? Why did you have to fold back into yourself at those memories? You don't know what you're seeking now, vengeance, restitution, it all becomes blurred in the heat of it, and god have you wanted to strip your skin and wake up restored since that night.

“You ruined me for a year Carmen. I was a shell of myself because of you. And then you called me that afternoon and you know what? I wanted to throw my phone into the fucking Hudson. I wanted to rip my hair out and scream and hurt you like you hurt me because the truth was I already forgiven you before you even apologised. And you never did. And I still wanted to come back to Chicago for you.” 

“Honey-” Carmen's strained voice shudders at your words, and you can make out the red of his eyelids, the tears collecting at his lids.

You hold up a hand, stopping Carmen from speaking, tears begin to form at your waterline, threatening to break, your vision blurs, the features of Carmen’s tormented face becoming wobbly and undefined. 

You were so sick of crying, you were so sick of it.

“And I won’t ever make you keep paying for a mistake for the rest of your life, I let go of that anger because you needed my help and in some way, I fell in love with you all over again, I was able to make peace with it.” 

“But you don't think I know you Carmen? When you overwork yourself to death you can barely eat? When you get bad again at calling me? When you were good, you were the best person in my entire world, but when you're like this?” You shake your head into the empty space between you, hands waving in front of you. 

Carmen looks torn apart, his hair falling flat against his forehead, his hands in tight fists as he shakes his head against your words. Begging, on his knees, begging for you to stop, to stop saying those things that came from your mouth that were not true. His body shakes with it, the gushing feeling of guilt, it washes over him in waves.

His mind is going a mile a minute, every thought of work, of that mismatched order he had to deal with, of the vendor who refused to deliver, it all went out the window the second your face contorted in that heart aching way. He can't lose you, every fiber in his being yearned for you, he lived for you. And here he was losing you, like a brush of paint across a canvas.

You were slipping from him every second you stood there with tears dripping down your cheeks like a stream.

“You’re the one that's changed. You're the one who's always changing. Don’t throw it back at me just because you can’t see it” You mutter with a shake of your head. Your voice carries a finality with it, and you jerk from Carmen when he takes a step towards you. You can't breathe in here, and you pass by the concerned gases of the rest of the Bear, shaking your head and moving away from Sydney, before dipping back into the busy streets of Chicago. You bite your tongue the entire way until the taste of copper fills your mouth.

Folding yourself into the huddled waves of mundanity, leaving your soup and the last bit of your aching heart on the bench of Carmen's office.

[heelluring]

— his regrets... • l.hs

wherein the sinner was once again hit by guilt but he guessed, it hurts the most when it hit the second time around [ part 1 ]

author's note ~ ! hi! so, i decided to write this since there are a lot of requests. i dont know if i ever gave the story any justice, i just hope i was able to deliver what i want to write. anyways, here you go. happy reading!

Heeseung stands outside the restaurant that both of you frequently visits. in the past, he'll drive to the restaurant while u're the one entertaining him through the passenger's seat. he'll call u pretty and will watch as a soft blush stain ur cheeks together with a subtle hit on his arms in attempt to hide your shyness. Both of you were happy that time, heeseung was happy, you were happy— when did everything go wrong?

oh, right. he cheated. he did the very same thing he promised he wouldn't do when you said yes to him. cheating with her older sister at that. what is he thinking, right? Heeseung also, didn't know.

And as much as he regret it, it wouldn't change a thing. He'll never feel your presence in his arms, again or feel how your lips fit so well in his.

It's been years since he saw even your shadows but you're still the one haunting his mind. After getting caught with his affair, he immediately ran after you but was failed. Came running to your apartment, but no one was there. Your landlord assured him though, he was told that your things are still in the apartment and that made him hope, maybe this will be a passing tumbles? Maybe he can still fix this?

He was definitely wrong. It was all but a delusion. You never came even if he waited for almost a week in that apartment just leaving whenever he had to go to work. But, you successfully avoided him. The next time he came, your apartment was wide open, your things were gone including you, and workers from the complex are now starting to clean the unit for the new potential buyers.

You successfully vanished through his life, didn't even get him a chance to see you before completely walking out of his life. The same time you left, so is heeseung's life started to crumble. He was called by the HR department one day, saying he's just there to talk. Though the way they have every evidence of his infidelity and disgusting rendezvous with Rina told him otherwise. That's just like a punch for him. Your crying and pained face draws on his mind, he can't think about anything but how hurt you were the day you found out. He was a jerk, a sinful man that doesn't deserve any forgiveness. If all, it just made another salt that was rubbed on his wounds. He was so stupid. How could he do that?

After all the things you did for him, this is what he decided to give back and thus, karma's out for him. Things happened so fast that when he came into realization, the company already sent a letter making him choose if they'll forcefully fire him or he'll just voluntarily resign. It doesn't matter anyways. His business was all the employees could talk about for the past few weeks, even if he gets fired or resigned, doesn't matter because people knew what he did and that goes the same with Rina. With no stable income, life was hard. Heeseung had a hard time applying in a new position. No one's accepting him, in the end, he became content with jobs that had nothing to do with his past career. Being a janitor or a delivery guy, he did everything and anything just to survive.

"Heeseung? what are you doing there? There's a lot of people since dinner already started, we need you at the back" Even being a waiter in your favorite restaurant was one of the things he did just to put food in his mouth. But he knew it wasn't just because of that. Heeseung wanted to be able to hold at least one small fragment of your memory that was still enclosed in this restaurant. Because, every time he sees that one special corner, he was able to be happy at least for a short period of time.

"Serve the new guests, it's on table 15" Heeseung nodded at that taking the menus on his arm before walking towards the table. It was a couple, the man was the only one he could see while the woman's back was facing him. A certain feeling took over his system. The woman looks familiar but that's impossible. Heeseung shook his head and his doubt, before putting on a smile.

"Good evening, and welcome to Chaconne. My name is Evan, and I would be your server for the night. Here's our—" His tongue was cut off when the woman looked at him. It was you, it was really you. Heeseung wanted to cry, to just get on his knees and say all the things he couldn't get to say all these years. But, who is he fooling? He knew that what he really wanted to do was to hide in shame and guilt. He always wanted to appear in front of you as a successful and strong person but instead, you saw this side of him. The one who's currently paying his dues with karma. You didn't say anything, just looking at him with sadness in eyes. He can't read that sadness as something different though. He knew that it was accompanied with pity, pity with someone you're just acquainted with.

"Sir? Are you alright?" The guy you're with asked. "Ah.. ah— yes. Yes, I am. I'm sorry for that, Sir. So here's our menu..." It was smooth, he was able to calm down. He needs to be professional, he can't afford losing this job and he also can't afford to make you uncomfortable. After a while, the guy who he knew called Jay called him again to take the orders. It was an understatement when we say heeseung can't take his eyes off of you that whole night. You look beautiful as ever, the only difference is that you look happier. Jay said something to you, and that made your eyes widen in bliss before giggling, hitting him softly with your hands. As a man, heeseung knew how Jay loves you. The way he looks at you, how he softly caresses your hand on his, drawing small shapes on its surface in process, how he smiles just to you was all he needed to know. Besides, it's the same look he's given to you. You look so happy, you might as well be glowing when you're with him. Heeseung on the other hand, can't do anything but be happy for you. You now feel at peace and secured, it's a long way from how miserable you have been with him and heeseung can't help but thank the one above for that. Even when you two finally finished your dinner, leaving gracefully with your chivarious man supporting you, heeseung can't help but to follow you with his eyes.

Oh how he wished, he was that man. Heeseung was not a saint. Of course, on top of being happy for you, he also felt bitterness creeping up his system. But it's all in vain.

"Hey, heeseung." One of his co-workers called when it was closing time handing him a dark blue colored envelope. "Remember the couple you served earlier? The woman told me to give this to you." His eyes widened, taking the envelope before saying his goodbyes to the other workers. He was in the park when he decided to open it. A can of beer, and a cup of ramen placed hastily on his side as he took the envelope out. It was elegant and sealed, he flipped it twice before carefully ripping through it when he made sure there were no written words outside.

Hey, heeseung. It's been awhile, years even. I know things didn't end well between us. I don't know if you're angry at me for the things I also did just to get back at you, and I won't blame you if you are. It doesn't matter though, I will still say sorry for those things. I was driven by my anger and pain, and because of that you lose your means to support yourself. I'm sorry Heeseung... for everything. For me, those moments were nothing but a memory, just a painful part of my past. I was able to move on and I hope that goes the same with you. You don't need to suffer, give yourself a chance again. Forgive yourself.

It's nice to see you again, Heeseung. You might not believe this but I hope you'll be happy, I am hoping for your best.

Heeseung didn't know he was crying until a tear stains the paper, the next thing he knew, his vision was blurry. "You were still saying sorry to me even though we knew I deserved it? Even wishing me happiness when I'm the one who took that away from you in the past. Y/n... how can you be so cruel?" His thumb brush on your signed name, as he whispers those words. How come, after all these years, you're still the one who can make himself feel understood. His whole system was numb, can't feel anything aside from pain. Is this the kind of pain you felt that night? Heeseung's happiness was with you but now, yours was nowhere with him. He feels relieved, yet there's a bittersweet feeling because this just means that he has to let you go, that this will be the last night he'll have a touch on your memories.

"Thank you... thank you so much... and i love you..."

heelluring, 2024

likes, reblogs, and comments are deeply appreciated ❤️

[h2llish]

【╰ヾ❝ COULD'VE BEEN ✧„

VIL SCHOENHEIT ── when it could've been ☆ angst, heartbreak, requited feelings, gender neutral, lowercase intended, not proofread

inspired by my fic from me to you

he remembered the moment you came to him, with a smile so sad and ready to be rejected as you gave him a envelope with your handwriting at the top, for vil. with it, a rose wrapped safely in ribbon. by the look on your face and the shyness in your tone as you gave it to him, he could guess what was in the letter tucked inside the envelope must've been important, at least to you. you didn't bother to wait for him to open and read it, you didn't seem to want a response if he did, only apologizing and thanking him before turning away.

rook was with him, with a knowing look that looked a little sad in similar to your smile. he questioned it, but rook brushed him off in rook fashion, telling him it wasn't his place to speak on your behalf. what did he know that vil didn't? the actor wondered silently but trusted his friend despite his question and worry for you.

so vil tucked the letter away and waited till he was alone in his room. as the day ended and he finished his night routine, he sat comfortably on his bed and grabbed the letter.

dear vil,

i've written this letter six times now, and i know that if i continue to read over this, i'll never gather the courage to give it to you. so please excuse how messy it is, and the mistakes you may possibly find.

by the time you get this, i'll be ready to leave for my world. ortho found me a way home, and i wish to return there, even though i'll miss a lot of people here. i'll miss you the most. i'm sorry you had to find out through a letter, a lot of my friends remained unaware, but when you get this, they'll all know just like you.

perhaps you've caught on, but rook was one of the few who knew, he also knew you were going to receive this letter. but, if you are upset at all, please don't be upset with him. i asked him to keep things to himself, he wasn't even meant to know. he was just respecting my wishes.

to the reason of my letter, this is where it might get messy, i hope you understand.

vil, i think you're wonderful, amazing even. while i know how we started off may not have been the most eventful or greatest, you've been respectful. even after you overblot, and forgive me for bringing it up, you've been nothing but kind to me and i thank you. when you offered your own money to ramshackle and then helped rebuild it when it was damaged, i was incredibly grateful.

you work hard, and you care about your dorm. not everyone may see it, but i do vil. you've done your research, have gotten to know everything about your dormmates, and made diets and routines just for them. it shows you really care.

we've gotten close. i care about you, and i think you care about me. we're friends.

but i'll be honest with you, my feelings for you have become more. i'm falling in love with you. i understand if you don't feel the same, i'd feel better if you don't, knowing my feelings were unrequited so i can leave with the guilt of only leaving my friends.

i'll probably be gone by now, and if not, i ask that you don't approach me. i wouldn't be able to keep myself together if you do. i want to go home, nothing will stop me from doing that. i'm sorry we can't have a proper goodbye, but for my own reasons, selfish i understand, i can't face you so this will have to do.

goodbye vil. and thank you for being my friend.

perhaps things could've been different.

sincerely, your friend, [name].

romantic feelings were new for the actor, you were the first person he'd felt anything for. he loved you; he realized as he sat there, hair pulled back neatly and mask on his face. he pinched the end of the letter in his feelings, relaxing when he worried he would tear it.

he respected your wishes in the letter, remaining in his room as he read over the words once more. although it was heavy on his shoulders, he knew even if he had left to confess his requited feelings, your decision would have never changed.

perhaps things could've been different, but you'd always choose your home, and he could not blame you.

patting myself on the back for managing to write something even if it's short. my headaches chilled out again and i took advantage.

do not repost, translate, copy or run my writing through an ai

[buddie-buddie]

"I'm so excited you're here" for buddie 🙏

"I'm so excited you're here," Christopher says, grinning up at Buck in the way that never fails to set his heart on fire. 

Buck smiles, tousling the curls on top of Christopher's head fondly. "You didn't really think I'd let your dad have all the fun, did you?"

Chris laughs at that, and for the first time since Buck watched him walk out Eddie's front door two months ago, it starts to feel like maybe everything is going to be okay again. 

It's not that Buck ever doubted Christopher and Eddie would find their way back to each other again. It wasn't a shock to him that Chris wanted to come back to LA– that he wanted to come home– nor was he surprised when Eddie dropped everything to get on the next flight to El Paso as soon as Christopher said he was ready. He never doubted that any of it would happen. 

Some selfish part of him just wished it hadn’t taken as long as it did. 

He knows it’s what Christopher needed, and he knows that Eddie did the right thing in letting him go. It just hurt, is all. Worse than he ever could have imagined. 

It felt like Buck’s chest had been cracked open, a piece of his heart ripped off, torn out. And as much as time helped to close the wound, it still ached with each breath he took. He still spent the last two months walking around like a piece of him was missing. 

And maybe it was. 

He and Eddie had gotten together not too long after Chris left, and Buck had spent the majority of the flight fretting over how Chris would react to the changes that occurred in his absence. Somewhere over New Mexico, Eddie had placed a hand on Buck’s bouncing knee, the familiar warmth of his touch instantly grounding. It washed over him like a balm, instantly soothing the restless hum beneath his skin. 

“Baby,” Eddie had said, his voice low so as to not disturb any of their fellow travelers. “It’s going to be fine. Great, even.”

Buck had let out a tiny sigh, trusting Eddie and yet still finding it hard to shake the last of the stress away. “Wh-What if he changes his mind?” he asked, the words bitter on his tongue. “What if he refuses to get on the plane? What if he– if he wants to stay with your parents? Eddie, I– I’ll never forgive myself if I’m the reason you lose him again, I–”

“Shh,” Eddie’s hand moved from Buck’s knee to take his hand, lacing their fingers together and giving Buck's hand a reassuring squeeze. “He’s over the moon,” Eddie reminded him. “Has been since we told him.”

Which was true. They’d kept it a secret for nearly a month– from Christopher, from the 118, from everyone. There was something special about it, keeping their relationship to themselves. Something almost sacred about walking around with Eddie’s heart in his chest and being one of only two people in the world who knew it. 

As special as it was, nothing came close to how good it was once they decided it was time to share it. 

Christopher had been their first call, with Eddie assuring him that if it wasn’t something he was comfortable with, they’d end it. The thought alone had Buck’s chest aching, his stomach turning. He only just got Eddie, only just started to feel whole for the first time in his life. The fear that accompanied the thought of losing that– of losing Eddie– was nearly paralyzing. But it wasn’t one he had to sit with for too long. Christopher had broken out in a huge grin, mumbled something that sounded a lot like “Finally.” 

They’d told everyone else after that, and Christopher wasn’t the only one whose reaction to the news included a wide smile and the word “Finally.”

And when Chris had texted this morning and said he wanted to come home, Eddie booked two tickets on the next flight out while Buck threw their things in an overnight bag and grabbed his keys. 

Buck struggled to get the words out. “I know,” he let out a long, shaky exhale. “I– I just–”

“You’re worried,” Eddie, as always, knew exactly where Buck’s head was at, even before Buck did himself. “Because you think you’re not going to be enough for him. You’re afraid you’re not enough to make him want to stay. And you love him so impossibly much, that even the thought of possibly losing him again makes your heart break all over again.”

Buck nodded, swallowing around a lump in his throat. “Yeah.” He took a deep breath, trying to will away the hot tears pricking at the back of his eyes. “How’d you know?”

Eddie sighed, squeezing Buck’s hand in his. “I feel it, too.”

Buck's eyes shone with unshed tears. He brought their joined hands to his lips, pressing a soft kiss to Eddie’s knuckles. “What a pair we make.”

Eddie had taken his phone from his pocket, pulling something up before passing it to Buck. “I feel it,” Eddie repeated. “But I’m not too worried anymore. And this is why.” 

Buck looked down to see Eddie’s text conversation with Chris. 

Buck’s heart swelled in his chest. He didn’t know if he’d ever be used to the feeling, to being loved like this. 

“There’s more,” Eddie said, scrolling down to newer messages, the time stamp indicating they were exchanged just before takeoff. 

Buck lost the battle then with the tears welling in his eyes, the first one slipping free as he smiled down at Eddie’s phone screen. The tears blurred his eyes until the messages were nothing but blue and gray blurs. 

Eddie had taken Buck’s face in his hands, wiping away the tears with his thumbs. And then he met Buck’s lips in a soft, sweet kiss, one that said more than his words ever could. 

“Nothing to worry about,” Eddie had said when they parted, calm and reassuring. “Except maybe the javelinas.”

Buck grinned, blinking back the last of his tears. 

“What are you smiling about?” Eddie teased. 

Buck nodded at Eddie’s phone in his lap. “I think you have something to ask me.”

The corner of Eddie’s mouth tugged up into a shy smile, his eyes bright. “Will you–”

“Yes,” Buck didn’t even let him finish, too eager to get the word out, to dive into the next chapter of his life with Eddie. “Yes,” he repeated, grinning as he closed the distance and kissed Eddie again. 

“Yeah?” Eddie breathed, equal parts hopeful and hesitant, the word coming out just shy of incredulous. Almost as if he couldn’t quite believe it. 

Buck nodded, never more sure of anything. “Yeah.”

And now, they’re standing on the front steps of Eddie’s childhood home and Chris is laughing and wrapping his arms around Eddie and Buck is watching them with a smile so wide his cheeks are starting to hurt.

And then Christopher looks at Buck and goes “Buck do you want to see a javelina tomorrow?” and Buck feels like he just won the lottery. 

“Absolutely,” Buck says. 

He’s the luckiest man in the world.

[mrylin]

you could do a reader and jenna ortega (they are already together) where they had a fight and the reader is giving her the silent treatment

leave, then come back (jenna ortega/reader)

summary: it's what's in on the request but i wanted something happy (i need to change that) but i hope it's good

warnings: fight angst angst and fluff at the end bc we need

She sat on the edge of the bed with her hands on her face, feeling her cheeks wet. it wasn't normal for you two get involved in such a big fight, just in small arguments common to couples.

This time, however, everything got even worse.

Jenna had said things she didn't mean, yelled at you when she lost her temper because you seemed so calm. She knew you just wanted to talk and go over certain things that really needed fixing, but with the stress of the day it all built up and she threw it all at you.

She knew that you were a person who didn't have a lot of patience and who would never endure screams in your face with your head down so she knew what awaited her. All that was left for her was try to make it up to you the best way.

"Y/n," Knocking on the door, she cracked it open and saw the dark room, the only light coming from the hallway. She knew you weren't sleeping. "Can we talk?"

For a second everything was silent and she held her breath, waiting patiently for something. A movement, a grunt, a scream. Anything. When she realized she wasn't going to get a response, she sighed and took the liberty of stepping inside, walking to the headboard.

She licked her lips which were extremely dry and cleared her throat. "I know I fucked up, I shouldn't have said those things," She said, hoping you would finally look at her. "I'm sorry." Came out in a whisper.

Again, you didn't react. Jenna felt her eyes sting again and rubbed her fingers across her eyes, deciding she wasn't going to give up until she got something out of you, even if it's a sigh. "It's okay. I can stay here all night."

She adjusted the large shirt to her body and sat down next to you, resting her hands on her knees and tapping her fingertips nervously. She said and would comply, would not leave there.

"You know, I love you. I know I never said this and now is probably the worst time to say that but I fucking love you." She licked her lips again. "And I know you're not someone who forgives easily but I hope sometime you do."

Silence. That was all she got. "I'm sorry." She whispered, lifting her hand to place on top of the one on your hip.

Your hand slowly moved away from hers, coming to rest underneath your head. Even though it was an act of rejection, Jenna saw it as a small sign, a painful one, but still a sign. "Y/n,"

"Go to sleep, Jenna." Came your voice, cold and flat, showing no emotion. She perked up.

"No." She said firmly. "I'll stay here all night if I have to."

You sighed irritably and sat up, finally looking at her and seeing her red cheeks, as well as her nose and swollen eyes. "Look, nothing is going to be solved overnight. You need to rest and so do I. Now, go to sleep." And so you went back to bed.

Jenna swallowed and pulled back the blankets, crawling into the space beside you and trying to get close to you but not really touching. She closed her eyes and listened for any complaints that could possibly come, but nothing happened. So she just lay there waiting for sleep to come.

"You know, that doesn't mean I've forgiven you."

She opened one eye and tried her best to look at you in the dark. "I don't expect you to do it yet."

The next morning, she awoke to a cold, empty bed and sleep quickly washed out of her body. She looked around worriedly, relaxing when she saw the bathroom door half open and heard the splash of shower water. Her heart slowed down the wild beats slowly.

"Hi." She said, low and shy when you left, not long after she woke up. You gave her a tight-lipped smile, trying not to make her any sadder. "Can we... can we have that talk now?"

A loud sigh escaped you. "I think we must."

Jenna nodded and got comfortable on the bed, waiting for you to sit down. You walked to the edge and stood there, looking straight ahead as you waited for her to speak.

"I did the wrong thing when I said all those things to you. I just... I was just so exhausted I exploded. And I know this doesn't justify anything, but..." She licked her lips. "I'm sorry."

You were silent for a while, pondering. What she said to you, how she said it, still burned in the back of your head and echoed in your ears. It was painful, it was going to hurt for awhile, but you didn't know what to do. Jenna was the one you loved and seeing her so sad and guilty and feeling like the worst person in the world was hurting you.

You closed your eyes and blindly reached between the sheets, squeezing her fingers as her hand held yours anxiously. "I'm not going to say it's okay, because it's not. But we have to work on it, and we will." Jenna quickly agreed.

"I didn't mean any of that. I love you, I could never hate you and..." She swallowed. "And you're not a horrible girlfriend, you're the best thing that ever happened to me."

A small smile appeared on your lips. "I know."

Jenna moved closer to you, leaning in slowly to give you time to pull away if you wanted to. When she realized you weren't going to, she placed her lips on yours softly, resting her forehead against yours after parting. She kept whispering "I love you"s, "I'm sorry"s, as if she stopped you would get up and leave.

She leaned against your chest as your hand went up to her hair, silently comforting her. There was a lot she had to work on, her words being one of them, but she wouldn't give up until she was the best person for you.

"I love you, Jen."

sorry for any mistake !!!

[sourbinnie]

☆ overcome.mp3 ☆

/ happy ending /

♡ genre ¿? ♡ -> angst with a hopeful ending ♡ pair ¿? ♡ -> ot8!skz x gn!reader ♡ plot ¿? ♡ -> forgiveness doesn't come easy but they already knew that. ♡ warnings ¿? ♡ -> cursing ♡ request ¿? ♡ -> yes!

first part -> hyung line | maknae line

a/n: here's the happy ending that i promised and we're done with the series ¡! you can choose which ending you prefer to read.

chan ✉

staying all alone that night made you process a whole lot of things. mostly how much you loved chan and how much he meant to you for you to give up. but that didn't mean that what he said didn't hurt you and affect you in a way. second chances are not given, they're earned and you wanted for him to prove that. for him to show you that he really wanted this and he wanted it as much as you did.

when he opened the door in the morning to check on you, he didn't expect to still find you in your shared bedroom. even after crying all your tears out, you didn't have the strength to face him because you didn't wanna give in too easily. you were determined to try and make him understand what you felt.

"hey babe. i called but you did not answer." he said simply and you just looked at him taking in his appearance. the bags under his eyes, the clothes that he wore yesterday and the regret in his voice. "i don't even know where to start, i just don't know why i said that and i'm sorry."

"i know. i just needed some time chris, it's okay. well i mean what you said it's not okay but i don't wanna lose what we have." you said as you grabbed his hand, intertwining your fingers with his and holding onto them. "but i need you that if something like this happens again, i won't hesitate to walk out the door." 

"i won't take you for granted. i just need one more chance and i'll show you what you truly are worth. i just can't believe i said those things and-." he tried to explain again but you stopped him

"chris. i know and let's try not to repeat that mistake, okay? i'd rather not talk about it because i don't wanna remember but just please know that i'll stay." you said and he sighed as he nodded. he felt like a weight was off his chest but at the same time he knew he had to be better and do better. it hurt to know that he hurt you but this was his chance to fix it.

minho ✉

you knew how he was. he was 100% gonna chase after you left even if you insisted that you wanted to be alone tonight. you still hoped he would come after you anyways, even if it still hurt. even if he found the worst words possible to express his anger, you wanted to see him. it might've been delusional or stupid but you needed to hear him say sorry a few more times.

and there he was, absolutely exhausted from running. leaving his work scene even after winning another show but caring a bit more about saving his relationship than celebrating with his bandmates. you looked at him right in the eye and you could sense regret but you needed to hear from him first.

"baby, love, jagi i'm so fucking sorry." lee minho was on his knees in a public scenery begging for forgiveness. you would've never painted this picture in your mind but here it was right in front of you. "i would do anything for you if i have to. i know i look like a fool and you're probably dying of embarrassment but if you decide to end things, i don't think i'm gonna be able to take it."

"just like i'm not taking what just happened. listen minho and please get up." like he was in your command, he got up immediately. "i don't know what your ex boyfriends/girlfriends were like but i'm not gonna stand the hurtful comments you make. however i'm not gonna let you go but i need some time yeah?" 

"how much time?" you've never seen him so determined yet so desperate at the same time. he really wanted to be with you and it showed but it wasn't enough. actions spoke louder than words and you hoped he would demonstrate that.

"i'll let you know, for now just let me be." you said walking away not before he hugged you tightly and did not let go for a solid minute. you ruffled his hair as you pressed a kiss to his forehead. maybe time would heal the open wounds after all.

changbin ✉

"did you truly feel that way?" you asked when he arrived home from the studio. you were so ready to leave but you needed to know before you did if this was anger speaking or if he truly felt what he said. you were a firm believer that words were spoken for a reason. he sighed and left his things before looking at you, trying to take in the scene that you might just leave him if you didn't say the right things.

"no. i could never feel that way about you even if i wanted to. i was angry and that's not an excuse but i need you to know that the truth is that. take me or leave me, i would rather you be with someone who didn't provoke as much damage as i did tonight." he said and you could see the tears coming out like a cascade. it hurt to see him this way and you didn't know what to do. "love i'm sorry, i know i don't deserve it but would you please stay tonight?" 

"why? what's gonna change?" you asked, crossing your arms as you looked at him. he looked so fragile and broken at the same time. he expected for you to be mad but you just looked disappointed and that hurt even more. "binnie please say anything just to make me wanna stay."

"i love you. i want to be with you so badly even if all my insecurities are telling me no right now, i need you so bad. i know i'm not enough, i know i shouldn't have said any of those words, fuck them, i always wanted you and that's never gonna change." he said wiping his tears away and getting close to you. you didn't take a step back this time as you took in your arms and cried with him. "i won't ever make you feel like that ever again (y/n), please stay."

"okay. i'll stay for tonight but we'll talk in the morning clearly yeah?" you said as he nodded. he needed to make things right this time and not let you down.

hyunjin ✉

you could hear a lot of movement coming from the other side of the door. you thought hyunjin left but it looked like he didn't as you headed towards your kitchen where the noise was coming. he was there doing the dishes, he had done every task that was left unattended before. if that made him think that he was gonna forgive you, then he didn't know you.

"yes i know. it's not enough but i was complaining like an idiot and not doing anything." he said as he sighed looking at you. you were still mad at his comments and it looked like it wasn't gonna be easy for him but then again that's what he loved about you, you stood there proud like you were. "i'm sorry. i shouldn't have said anything and i don't know what it was that put me in a mood to say that shit to you. it doesn't matter, what matters is you and i hope you know that i will change if i have to because i can't be creating drama like this anymore."

"it's not that jinnie. i usually don't mind putting up with it but today it was too much. your words just hurt me in a way, made me feel like i was worth less than you and them for that matter." you explained and he nodded. he felt like crying but he didn't want to in front of you. he felt hopeless and so fucking sad that he made you feel like this. 

"i know. i'm sorry, you're worth more than i could ever ask for and i don't want you to feel any different. i know it's not easy what you do and i'm gonna help around more because we're a team right? we both need to put in the effort." he said as he got close to you, carefully planting a kiss on your forehead. 

"a team, i like that." you muttered as you gave in to his arms and rested your head on his chest.

jisung ✉

being without jisung was hell but you needed time. even if he tried to contact you in every way that he could, it went ignored for now. it was probably painting the worst image on his mind but one day you showed up back to the apartment you shared together. it surprised you to see him there, sleeping on the couch, you would've thought he was staying at the dorms.

"baby? you're here?" he asked as he opened his eyes and tried to compose himself in front of you. he got up so fast, he almost fell but he tried to put on his best look as he didn't know why you were here. well it was your house but after what happened, he lived there thinking the worst. "babe can we talk?"

"yeah that's why i came here. to give you a chance to explain yourself." you said firmly and it took him by surprise just like your arrival. he wanted a second chance so badly so he decided to look for the best words and to tell you the absolute truth of it all.

"okay. i'm gonna start by saying i'm sorry and letting you know that even if i did fuck up real bad, i still want you and only you more than anyone or anything. i don't think you're difficult and i definitely don't think you're bad. i just said the worst words at the worst time didn't i? now that i'm saying it out loud i don't think i even deserve a second chance. but i'm gonna fight for you every day because i truly believe you're the one (y/n)." he said and he expected not to cry but he still felt the sobs leaving his body anyways.

you welcomed him in your arms as he couldn't stop crying and sighed. jisung wasn't truly mean spirited, he wouldn't say words like that because he meant them you thought. it would take long to heal but you were willing to give him another chance.

"it's okay. we're okay but we still need to talk about it whenever we can yeah?" you said as he responded "yesyesyes" which made you laugh. you wiped his tears away and hoped that things like these wouldn't happen again.

felix ✉

i waited an entire day to text felix again. as much as i was doubting myself, thinking that maybe i am too clingy, there was a part of me hoping he didn't mean it at all. expecting that the worst was just out of anger or fear and not a pure emotion he was feeling so hurtful and devastating. i got an immediate response saying he would come over and before i could respond, he was already at the door.

opening up the door to see a distraught and tired felix was a surprise. it was a competition through your mind telling you that you shouldn't care about what he did but in the end your tender side always won as you took in his appearance. 

"love i'm sorry. i'm so fucking sorry." he repeated over and over as he came in but he didn't just pass through, he fell right into my arms as i held him. "i'm the fucking clingy one, i'm the one who can't be without you and you're not a bother at all. i invited you and every frustration got the best of me and i took it out on the person i love the most and i-."

"i know." i didn't exactly know because there was still this side of me that was deeply hurt by his words. but i was willing to understand where he was coming from and what was happening that led him to get so angry.

"i don't deserve your forgiveness. i don't even deserve to be standing here in front of you or you holding me but please know that i will always be sorry about this." he said looking me in the eye. bloodshot eyes suddenly closing as i leaned in and met him for a kiss. it was a painful one because it felt like a last one but i savoured every moment that i could get with felix. 

"i still want you felix." i said and he closed the gap again as he met me for another kiss. he wanted me as much as i did and sometimes doing something about it spoke louder than a million words.

seungmin ✉

as you unlocked the door of your unshared bedroom, you didn't expect seungmin to be sleeping on the floor on the other side. you crouched down as you slowly poked him to wake him up and that's when he opened his eyes, they were reddish and his hair was a mess. 

"i didn't even notice i fell asleep at the door." he said as you both got up and the tension was still there. you didn't know how to feel and he didn't know what to say exactly. he was convinced you were mad at him but you just looked so sad that it broke him. even when you closed the door and he pretended to walk away, he stayed. he wanted to see you so bad yet every part of him knew that you needed to be alone.

"minnie do you actually want to break up with me?" you asked and you never saw him shake his head so fast. he didn't cry very often but he was willing to cry in front of you if it meant that you would see how sorry he was.

"never in a million years. i know what i said is not okay and that i should've never mentioned it in the first place." he said as he took your hands and looked at you again. "i'm sorry love, i'm sorry for making you feel unappreciated and unloved because that's the thing i want you to feel the least."

"i just thought you were going to leave me when you said that." you sincerely said and if his heart didn't break before, the sight and the words before him were killing his heart slowly.

"no, never. you can't get rid of me that easily baby. i will always stay and tell you the truth." he said as he kissed your cheek and as soon as he placed it, you gave him a little smile that warmed his heart back again. maybe you wouldn't get over this quickly but then again he did not expect that to happen, he would be there in the healing process.

jeongin ✉

he did let you go that night but he insisted that he wanted to talk every minute of the day after it. as much as you thought that you needed time, you needed to see him again before it all crumbled apart. he was there waiting for you in your apartment as you got back from work. who knows how long he had been standing there, looking a mess and hoping for the best.

"(y/n), god i missed you." it filled your heart with so many feelings that you could not express the way he said those words. you were so hurt and you could tell by just looking at him that he wasn't doing well either. he wanted to lean in for a kiss or just have you in his arms again but he contained himself from doing so.

"i missed you too innie. i think we need to talk before... we do anything." you said and he nodded as he stood there awkwardly but he knew it was his turn to talk, to mend things and to make it right this time like he didn't do it that night.

"i'm sorry, i know that it wasn't an okay thing to say. i know exactly why i'm with you and i wouldn't want to be with anyone else in any other way. i want you because you've taught me so much, showed me so much of myself and loved me unconditionally from the start." he was in the verge of tears but he swallowed and continued talking. "i don't think i'm able to be without you, just right now it's been hell."

"i feel the same way, i don't like being apart from you even if i'm mad." you said honestly and he nodded 'cause he felt the same way. "i would like to take things slow, i don't forgive you fully but you're there innie. i wish i could erase the pain but i can't."

"i know, i'll show that i mean it baby. i'll show you how i actually feel." he said and you believed him. you truly did want him to show you what needed to be shown. before he could leave, you hugged him so tight and that's when he let the tears actually go.

[bigdumbbambieyes]

It's been almost a year and Billy still aches.

It's not constant, but when it's there, it's there.

And it's worse when he runs into Steve, in public, and Billy sees his new boyfriend with him.

He'd moved to Chicago with Steve after graduation, when they had been inseparable. They'd been desperate to leave Hawkins and after finding a two-bedroom apartment, they'd packed up and left.

And once the trauma of the Upside Down had begun to settle, they felt...different. They fought more. They didn't fit. And they had begun to wonder if they ever had.

They say the breakup was mutual, but they know it wasn't. Not when Billy's been unable to move on and Steve's found happiness elsewhere.

Billy can't blame him, though. He's so fucked up, he's surprised Steve didn't leave sooner.

But, those big doe eyes suddenly meet his across the department store where they're shopping for Christmas and Billy immediately looks away, like a coward.

Because that's what he's always been, a fucking coward.

He glances again, sees Steve tell his boyfriend something before making his way over and Billy's stomach sinks.

No, not today, please.

"Hey," Steve whispers as he saddles up beside Billy, and when he glances over at him, he sees that familiar small, warm smile and it rips his heart right out of his chest.

"Hi," he mutters, glancing down at the gift set he'd been eyeing for Max.

"That for Max?" Steve asks, his voice light, knowing.

Billy shakes his head 'no' and turns away from it, looking at Steve again. He eyes him for a second before glancing over his shoulder, catching the new guy watching them. As if Billy would try anything.

"You going back to Hawkins for Christmas, too?" Steve asks, tilting his head, getting Billy's attention back so effortlessly.

Too.

"He going with you?" Billy asks, unable to help himself.

Steve's face twists a little, like maybe he's thinking of lying, but he doesn't. He can't. "Yeah."

Billy liked the Harringtons. They had liked him. He wonders how they'll like the new guy.

"You should stop by, on Christmas Day," Steve smiles weakly. He knows how shitty Christmas is to Billy - how shitty his father is to him.

But, the thought of going to the Harrington house on Christmas Day as Steve's ex, where he'd spent the last three Christmases, makes spending Christmas at the Hargrove house sound just a little better.

Which is fucking sad.

Because it should be him going home to Hawkins with Steve, it should be him shopping for Christmas presents with Steve, not...him. Whatever his name is, Billy can't remember. Doesn't want to.

And despite how fucking sad everything is, Billy can't help but to flick his gaze down to Steve's jacket--

His jacket. Billy's. The brown leather one he's been missing.

He should demand it back. Strip it off Steve's body, make him apologize for taking what isn't his.

But, he doesn't. Instead, with his eyes on the leather, he asks quietly, "What does he have that I didn't?"

There's a brief silence, the people walking around them chatting and laughing and passing by, before Steve says, "He talks to me. Opens up. He makes me feel wanted. I never have to guess what he's feeling. He soothes my worries. He loves me the way I want to be loved."

So, everything.

His eyes burn as he flicks them back up to Steve, sees the sorry expression there. Billy knows he looks like shit. He's been going through a lot and it reflects on his face.

He's tried to forgive himself for how things ended between them, how he had lacked what Steve needed. Needs. And he couldn't fix himself fast enough, couldn't recover what he'd lost, so now he's here: watching the love of his life shop with another man.

It hurts more because he had been Steve's first everything with a guy. He had expected Steve to go back to some woman, some girl who could give him a family like he wanted. He wasn't supposed to kiss another man, hold his hand, love him.

That was supposed to be Billy's to cherish for the rest of his life, because after Steve, who was he supposed to love? It seems impossible now, to love another, when he still has so much to give the pretty boy in front of him.

Steve's mouth twitches, like it used to when he was nervous, and he mutters, "I'm sorry, Billy...but, it's the truth."

And the truth always hurts.

He gives Steve an empty smile, "I'm happy for you."

"No, you're not," Steve huffs wryly.

"Then let's just pretend I am," Billy mutters.

Another brief silence, their eyes meeting in the busy store, and Billy knows this is it. This is what they are.

Steve manages another small smile and nods, "Okay. We can pretend."

Billy will pretend for the rest of his life, then. If Steve's happy, that's all that matters.

He just wishes it was with him.

Nodding, and swallowing thickly, Billy manages the courage to mutter, "Merry Christmas, Steve."

"Merry Christmas, Billy," Steve whispers, no longer smiling and his brown eyes sad.

Billy turns and walks away with tears burning in his eyes, knowing Steve still holds his beating heart in his hands and always will.

[flowerandblood]

The Pearl and the Sapphire (2)

[ modern! • Aemond x Baratheon! • female ]

[ warnings: sexual tension, anxiety, angst ]

[ description: As a representative of a large family-owned gemstone business, Aemond is attending a major jewellery event where jewellery makers from all over the world are exhibiting. One of them is the Baratheon family. Aemond is tasked with focusing on attracting new customers, but his attention is diverted by the youngest daughter of the eminent maker Borros Baratheon. Slow burn, bitchy, possessive and obsessive Aemond, lots of dark angst and sexual tension. ]

A story which is an alternative universe of The Impossbile Choice taking place in modern times. The characters are all the same as in the main series, however, for obvious reasons they will behave differently and experience things differently from medieval times. You can read this without having to delve into the main series.

Series moodboard: Aemond & Miss Baratheon

* English is not my first language. Please, do not repost. Enjoy! *

Previous and next chapters: Masterlist

______

Working on costumes for their family's show at Crystal EXPO was the only thing that kept her from sinking into her grief and sadness after Cregan told her he felt he wasn't ready for a serious relationship yet. Although they had been together officially for several months, he had apparently realised that he was still attracted to other women and didn't want to deny himself from adventures with them.

Cregan was a handsome, warm and open men, constantly making her laugh. She met him when he came to their house to pick up an order for his father's jewellery shop and stayed for dinner with them. They immediately caught a great connection, found each other on Facebook and frequently wrote to one another.

She experienced her first time with him.

He was affectionate and gentle, took his time and gave her a huge sense of comfort, for which she was grateful. Before he even entered her he brought her to orgasm with his tongue, wanting to make sure she was definitely well moistened, and then with slow, gentle movements he took her on her bed in her bedroom, kissing her face tenderly.

Cregan was always frank and direct; she felt safe with him. However, she could see that at some point something was off, that something was wrong. One day she plucked up the courage to finally ask him what was going on and that's when he told her.

"There is a woman in my work. There is chemistry between us, but I would never hurt you or humiliate you with betrayal. However, the way I feel when I look at her has made me realise that I don't think I'm suited to a relationship with one person." He said and covered his face with his hands, his voice breaking as if he was about to cry.

She felt a tightness in her throat and stomach as she looked at him, sitting next to him on the couch, her hands clenched into fists on her lap.

"I'm so sorry. I like and appreciate you so much, I'm so comfortable with you. But…but I think I'd rather end this before I hurt you, you deserve better. Forgive me." He said and broke into sobs.

She stroked his back, feeling strange with the fact that she was the one who had to comfort him. She swallowed with difficulty tears that ran down her face.

He begged her to remain friends, to keep writing to each other, to keep in touch, but she said she needed a break and that she understood him. That she was grateful to him for telling her before he did anything bad.

Still, she felt pain at the thought that she wasn't enough.

She wasn't enough for him to want only her.

She didn't show in front of him how badly she had broken down so as not to further deepen his remorse, however, as soon as he left she called Royce and started sobbing into the receiver. Royce had finished work at his father's workshop early to come to her and spent the night in her room, just sleeping next to her and stroking her head.

He couldn't put his feelings into words, but he was always there for her when she needed him.

When she suggested to her father that their show this year would be themed and that she would sew outfits in which they would present their jewellery pieces he was delighted and kissed her forehead, teasing her skin with his rough beard. Her sisters were also thrilled that they would be able to perform in beautiful costumes at such a prestigious festival tailor-made especially for them.

Thinking about the show, planning everything and sewing filled her days between college classes making her feel better and better.

Once every few days she would get a message from Cregan telling her about his day, each time announcing at the end that he hoped she was doing well and that he was thinking about her constantly. On the one hand, she was glad that he hadn't forgotten her; on the other hand, she found it even harder to understand why they had broken up in the first place.

Months flew through her fingers and she didn't even know when there was only a week left until the whole event. Everyone was excited and had gone there early to prepare their stand. Royce poked her on the shoulder as they arranged the ruby necklaces made by their father on display.

"Have some fun. Pick out some rich snob and spend a nice time with him." He said, and she looked at him with pity.

"I don't think that would make me feel any better." She said amused, a wide smile on her face.

If it had only been about the adventure, breaking up with Cregan wouldn't have hurt her so much.

Before the show itself, she began to feel stressed. She and her sister looked beautiful, on the backstage she was still tweaking their hairstyles and tightening their gowns to make them look their best. Cassandra looked at herself in the mirror, turning with satisfaction.

"Great job, sister. I look like Marie Antoinette!"

Filled with euphoria and adrenaline, she remembered little of it when she and Royce stepped out into the middle, the lights directed at them so that she couldn't see the faces of those sitting around her. Her older brother's presence and smile gave her courage, she just looked at him to avoid distraction.

They knew the dance routines by heart and both had an excellent sense of rhythm, so dancing with him was a pleasure. She was frightened when she turned around during one of the moves and a blue glow flashed before her eyes.

What was that?

She turned again, falling into Royce's embrace, and they continued on for a while until finally the music ended and they moved into their final position. There was thunderous applause all around them. Royce took her hand and pressed it to his lips, placing a respectful kiss on her skin.

"I think you sold us perfectly, sister." He said amused, and she laughed lightly at his words, stepping closer to the audience with him to bow.

"We'll see about that yet, I'm curious…" She said and froze, seeing out of the corner of her eye a men looking at her with a look as if he wanted to kill her, in his left eye socket a large, sparkling sapphire.

Who is this?

She pressed her lips together, unsure of what to do, and blinked, reminding herself that she'd broken off in the middle of a sentence.

"…I'm curious if our father liked it." She said smiling again, bowing along with him, her brother's only response was 'I'm sure he did.'

She breathed a sigh of relief afterwards, when they returned backstage her sisters hugged her saying that it was a great experience and that they should do something similar next year.

She was glad that although they didn't always agree, this time she had the support of her whole family. Her father approached her in tears of emotion, saying that his works of art had never looked more beautiful and the audience was delighted.

For the first time since her split with Cregan, she felt happiness and warmth filling her body.

She and Royce decided to stay in their costumes at the banquet, wanting to draw attention to their father and their products. Borros thought this was an excellent idea and they entered the hall as a trio.

Indeed, they were surrounded by various celebrities congratulating them on their idea and workmanship, asking who was responsible for their attires and expressing admiration when her father boasted that his own daughter had sewn them.

"This is my greatest jewel." He said curtly. She felt embarrassed and looked away, feeling her cheeks burning.

She cast a glance around the hall and spotted from afar the man who had been watching her so demonically during her dance. He was looking at her again, but in the lamplight he looked less dark than she had originally thought.

He was tall, his light hair slicked back, dressed in a black turtleneck, jacket and trousers that perfectly emphasised how well built he was. His artificial sapphire eye sparkled, his scar stretching across the entire left half of his face aroused her curiosity.

She thought he was very brave and clever creating an asset out of his wound and smiled in his direction, wanting to show him that his appearance did not scare her at all.

She saw him tighten his lips and avert his gaze immediately, taking a greedy sip of alcohol from his glass, a mature woman in a long, tight gold dress was saying something to him, but he did not seem to be listening to her.

She wondered if they were together, but the age difference between them was striking.

Perhaps it was his mother?

When she finally pulled off all the layers of her gown in the evening and changed into a Tshirt she breathed a sigh of relief, feeling lighter. She got lots of messages on Instagram from people who found her after the show.

Once she had written them back she remembered the man she had seen during the dance and his disturbing fake sapphire eye. She asked her father at dinner if he knew who he was, and when he found out it was someone without an eye he said it was definitely Viserys Targaryen's son.

She knew that her father had turned down an offer from his grandfather to be their exclusive supplier. Her father, however, did not want to hear about it.

"They want to lock us in their golden cage, fill us with their paperwork and make us dependent. I'd rather be independent and pay more for the stones than let them put a collar on me." He told them then furiously, and none of them had the courage to contradict him.

She involuntarily typed the name 'Targaryen' into a google search to read a little more.

She knew that Viserys Targaryen was his father and one of the main directors of the company, but who was Aemond? She clicked on that suggestion and immediately knew she had hit on it. The first thing that popped up was a newspaper article, so she opened it right away.

She felt an unpleasant tightness in her stomach reading it all. She thought that if she read such things about herself in newspapers she would be horrified and heartbroken. The realisation that their own employees were reporting them to the press to make a bit of money on the side seemed horrible to her, let alone trying to maintain any privacy.

She thought she was not surprised to see no satisfaction or joy on his face, as he had no reason to be happy. He looked as if he was prepared to take a hit from either side, but only now did she understand why.

She thought she felt sorry for him.

The title 'One-eyed heir to a fortune' seemed cruel and mocking to her, as if the absence of his eye was the only thing that defined him as a man. She remembered the sapphire he wore and felt a kind of pride in the fact that he had turned his weakness into strength.

She thought she would like to get to know him.

To see what kind of man he was.

The opportunity came the next day. She was just choosing her tea at breakfast when she heard someone stand down beside her and place his cup under the coffee machine. She glanced involuntarily to the side and saw that Aemond Targaryen in the flesh was again looking at her as if he wanted to murder her. Her lips twitched in amusement, a smile appeared on her face.

"Good morning." She said softly, curious to see if he would answer her, dropping a bag of Earl Grey into her mug.

"Good morning." He replied after a moment, lowly, languidly, with some kind of tension, pressing the button for a double espresso in a reluctant manner, the machine rattled and liquid began to pour out of it.

She pressed her lips together, not knowing if she should say something or if he felt like talking. She poured two teaspoons of sugar into her cup, waiting for his machine to free up so she could pour herself some water, and glanced at him again.

She swallowed loudly when she saw that his gaze had moved from her mug to her face again, looking at her as if he wanted to say something but couldn't.

She lowered her head, tightening her lips, not wanting to offend him, amused that for some reason she had apparently also piqued his interest, which he had been unable to verbally articulate in any way.

She saw that at her gesture he tensed all over and with a swift movement grabbed his cup, apparently wanting to leave. Her heart pounded harder and she looked behind him.

"Your sapphire eye. It's beautiful." She said, and only when it came out of her mouth did she realise how pathetic it sounded.

She wanted to use it to say how much she appreciated his bravery, but it sounded like she, like everyone else, was only paying attention to that one thing about his whole person.

She felt ashamed.

She placed her cup under the vending machine he was using, stepping closer, feeling her heart pounding hard. He didn't walk away, he stood looking at her, his gaze almost burning her.

"Who made these for you?" She added, pressing the button that caused hot water to start pouring into her mug. He was silent for a moment, but didn't move from his place.

"The Hightowers." He replied coolly and she looked at him again, his gaze full of tension, dark and indifferent, there was a vast, black void. She swallowed loudly at the thought, lowering her gaze and nodded.

"The jewellery you were wearing at the show. Will it be possible to see it up close?" He asked uncertainly, with difficulty, and she looked at him surprised, not expecting him to say anything else.

"Yes, of course. At our stand, they will be on display along with other works of my father and brother worn yesterday by me and my sisters." She said softly, and he furrowed his brow, as if something she said had puzzled him.

They both flinched and moved away with their mugs when a man apparently also wanting to make himself a coffee stopped behind them.

She glanced over her shoulder at him, his gaze still fixed on her, piercing and disturbing, making her shiver.

Why was he looking at her like that?

"See you later." She said lightly, and he merely nodded.

She moved towards the table where her family were sitting, feeling that her legs were as soft as cotton wool, her heart pounding in her chest like mad, her cheeks were all red from the effort that this exchange of words had turned out to be for her.

She glanced from the corner of her eye at the table where he was sitting, saw that he had said something to the woman sitting opposite him, the same one she had taken for his mother, his expression one of displeasure.

They were arguing about something.

She shuddered when she saw him get up suddenly and move to the exit, leaving the woman alone. She swallowed loudly when the woman turned her gaze on her, as if accusing her of something, and then took her things and left as well. She lowered her gaze to her tea and began to think hard.

What if they weren't family or co-workers?

She felt a squeeze in her heart at the thought of Cregan. She involuntarily grabbed her phone lying on the table and unlocked it only to see two new messages from him.

She pressed her lips together, feeling the pain, not knowing what to do. She knew that he wanted to continue their friendship, that in his own way he still loved her, but she felt tears under her eyelids.

She thought maybe it would have been better if he had left her alone, instead of tearing her wound over and over again whenever she thought it had had time to heal. She swallowed quietly and wrote him back quickly.

She locked and muted her phone, then set it aside so that she wasn't looking at the display. Royce looked at her anxiously, but didn't want to broach the subject in front of his father.

After they broke up Cregan was his number one enemy.

She managed to distract herself from her gloomy thoughts when they started working on the stand, they were attracting more interest than ever. Their show had been a huge success and she felt a burst of pride.

They had several ancillary rooms with illuminated tables. On one of them she laid out the jewellery she had worn the day before and other items in which sapphires had been used, to show them to Targaryen when he arrived, as promised.

After a couple of hours, when she had just finished talking to a customer, Royce approached her and grunted, a clear embarrassment on his face.

"Listen… young Targaryen wanted to talk to our father, but he said he didn't want to see him. He came with his grandfather. I don't know what to tell them, they just came here. Will you talk to him somehow? You have a talent for diplomatic refusal." He said, scratching his chin, and she laughed under her breath.

"I'll listen to what he has to say and then politely refuse him. If he say anything interesting, I'll pass it on to my father myself, maybe then he'll take it better." She said lightly and her brother nodded, patting her on the back and said he would replace her.

She stepped out from behind the counter and that's when she spotted him, standing in front of one of their shop windows, watching her vigilantly from the side.

"Come with me." She said softly and heard him move behind her with an unhurried step.

She led him into the dark room she had prepared for him earlier and made him realise that whatever he had to say to her father, he would have to pass it on to her first.

He looked at her from across the room like a predator, frowning his eyebrows, clearly not expecting this turn of events. She could see that he was thinking about something strenuously, saw his tongue involuntarily hit the inside wall of his cheek.

"We'll talk on my terms." He said coolly, and she tensed all over feeling that he was not happy with what he had just heard. She thought he was going to tell her that he wouldn't talk about business and such big contracts with a child.

"Tonight at 7 p.m. You, me, wine and a hotel restaurant."

She felt her lips part involuntarily, her heart stopping for a moment. She blinked, wanting to see something in his face that would tell her he was joking.

What?

She swallowed loudly feeling that she hadn't answered for too long, his gaze grew darker, he turned his face to the side, tightening his lips, impatient.

"I… yes, of course." She choked out finally, not knowing what else she could say. He looked at her again then.

"Mmm." It came out of his throat like a murmur, his lips curving for a second into what she could call a smirk of satisfaction. He turned and left without saying goodbye, closing the door behind him.

She was tired and sleepy after a full day on the stand; however, she also felt a strong rush of adrenaline at the thought that she was about to meet him. She opened the wardrobe in her hotel room, scratching her head, wondering strenuously what she should wear.

This wasn't a date, was it?

It was official meeting, but she wasn't prepared for such an occasion.

In the end her choice was a black suede fitted knee-length dress with a white collar and long sleeves, deciding it was the most elegant thing she had.

She decided to leave the blue ribbon in her hair, not wanting to look like she was going to a funeral, and took her pastel blue clutch bag with her, throwing her phone into it, not looking from the morning to see if she had received any messages.

She was afraid to look in there.

She walked down the stairs to the ground floor, heading for the hotel restaurant. She had no idea why but felt her legs shaking with stress. She turned up five minutes early and was pleased to find that he wasn't late either.

He was sitting at a two-person table arranged at the very end of the room, gazing out the window, his hand outstretched on the table moving restlessly. He was dressed in a black leather jacket, black Tshirt and black trousers.

She felt ashamed that she had dressed like a girl for the end of the school year, but it was too late to go back to change into something more lightweight. When she stopped in front of him he flinched suddenly and looked at her as if frightened. He stood up and they both looked at each other uncertainly, not knowing how they should greet each other.

She thought that she certainly couldn't embrace him, however, as a woman, she had to offer something else. She held out her hand to him and he swallowed loudly before shaking it, his hand was large and warm. She sat down opposite him, putting her clutch bag aside, smiling at him, trying to hide how stressed she was. She saw his gaze escape to the side, raised his hand and nodded towards the waiter.

After a moment a young men, not much older than her, approached them asking what they wanted to order. She was silent for a moment and then saw that Targaryen was looking at her expectantly, clearly wanting to hear what she wanted to drink. She leaned quickly over the card and glanced at him uncertainly.

"Red semi-sweet wine?" She asked more than stated, and he nodded.

"We'll have the whole bottle, please." He added, and she swallowed loudly, wondering how long this conversation was going to be and why.

Was he trying to tire her out and muddle her so that she would eventually succumb and accept his terms on behalf of her father?

She twisted uneasily in her seat at the thought, sensing that he was watching her closely and feeling like he could see her cheeks burning.

"Why did your father refuse to speak to me in person?" He asked abruptly. She looked up at him and grunted quietly, rubbing her palms against her knees in an attempt to calm herself.

She had no intention of lying to him.

"My father doesn't want to tie himself to you for a monopoly on supplies. He wants a free hand in this." She said, looking bravely into his face. His gaze was so intense that she felt a tightening in her pit. He tapped his finger on the table top involuntarily, as if he was thinking about something.

"It's a condition for such good prices. We can change them, but then the prices will also go up." He said coolly, and she pressed her lips together.

"That's why in his opinion it doesn't make sense. Why should he engage with you if at the end of the day you will offer him the same prices as the others, and you will be more demanding and restrict him more?" She asked and shuddered as the waiter placed a glass in front of her and then in front of him.

She fell silent as she waited patiently for the boy to pour them some wine and smiled as she saw his hands tremble, she thought he had worked here for a short time. She shuddered and moved away when a few drops fell on the tablecloth right next to her clutch bag, Targaryen gave him a warning look.

"I'm very, very sorry." The boy said, and she and he reached for a napkin, but she was quicker and applied it quickly to the stain, looking at him with a smile.

"Nothing happened, thank you very much." She said softly. He nodded and apologised a few more times before walking away, taking the dirty handkerchief from her.

She glanced at her companion, he was sitting leaning casually against the back of the chair watching her closely with the same gaze she had seen on their show.

"What do you mean by 'restricted'?" He alluded to her earlier statement as if something about it frustrated him. She swallowed loudly at the thought, wondering how to explain it to him so as not to offend him.

"My father values freedom of action. Also the choice of materials to work with. He now works with who he wants and decides for himself what is best for him. He fears that your company, with lawyers deliberating over every comma in the contract, will arrange it so as to influence his decisions as much as possible." She said finally, saw that he furrowed his brow at her words.

"You think we're going to try to trick your father?" He asked with a note of irritation, and she threw him an impatient look.

"Can I trust you?" She asked suddenly and saw that he froze, his lips slightly parted. He clenched his jaw and began to play with his fingers extended on the armrest.

Silence.

"What do you mean?" He asked cautiously, she could feel her heart pounding. She sighed quietly, not taking her eyes off him.

"I mean exactly what I asked. Can I trust you?" She repeated, looking at him pleadingly, simply wanting to hear that he meant well and understood what she was saying. His lips twitched impassively.

"No."

She looked at him and blinked rapidly, unable to believe he had said that.

No?

So what was the point of this conversation?

"You can't trust me, just as I can't trust you. You will protect your father's interests and I will protect mine. There is no friendship in business or holding hands in the sunset light." He said dryly and lowly, looking at her as if he thought she was out of her mind.

She furrowed her brow, feeling humiliation spread across her face, felt a burning sensation under her eyelids, but did not allow herself to show anything more.

"I didn't know that to trust someone you had to be able to be friends and hold hands. I thought it was enough to be a decent human being." She said in pain and for the first time she saw something twitch in his face, as if an electric current had passed through him, his hand clenched into a fist.

She reached for her glass and took a deep sip from it, feeling the dryness in her throat, her heart pounding like mad. She saw him turn his face away, running his hand over his chin, impatient, apparently trying to calm himself down internally. He, too, took his glass and took a deep sip from it, setting it down with a loud clink of glass.

"I'm not a decent person." He said finally, and she felt a tightening in her throat, as if he had slapped her.

Why did she feel around him like she did around Cregan when he broke up with her?

"Nevertheless, I have with me the terms and conditions of our company written down on paper, without paragraphs written in small print. You can look them over and determine whether you want to pass them on to your father or not." He said a little softer, biting his lower lip.

"We can't be together, I'm not ready, I want to have some fun. But we can be friends, I want to know what's going on with you, I miss you."

She felt tears running down her cheeks in embarrassment, her lower lip trembling involuntarily at the same feeling of humiliation.

She saw his healthy eye widen in shock, his lips parted. He swallowed loudly, looking at her in disbelief, and wanted to say something clearly, but they both flinched when her phone began to vibrate in her clutch bag.

She wiped her cheeks quickly, wondering what she had actually been doing, and with a trembling hand opened her purse, thinking it was her father or Royce looking for her. She felt a tightening in her stomach and turned pale when she saw that she had four new messages from Cregan and three missed calls from him, including one incoming.

The phone vibrated in her hand and she didn't know what to do, so she dismissed the call, slipping it quickly back into her bag. Targaryen looked at her as if he thought she was about to faint.

"… Are you all right?" He choked out finally, clearly horrified by her condition.

"No." She mumbled at the same time bursting out laughing, making an essentially pathetic mixture of it, grabbing the bottle standing next to her and pouring herself a full glass of wine, struggling to hold back the tears that were once again pushing their way into her eyes.

She drew in a loud breath and took a large sip, setting the glass down, looking at her hands, trying to calm herself.

She saw that he moved uncomfortably in his seat, swallowing loudly, his fingers rubbing together quickly in a sign of his anxiety. She looked at him surprised when, after a long moment, he suddenly leaned forward, took a bottle of wine from her side of the table and poured himself a full glass, as did she.

For a while they sat and drank in silence.

She felt embarrassment at the thought that she had taken it out on him for what Cregan was doing to her.

Whoever Aemond Targaryen was at least he did not lie and tried to be honest when she accused him of false intentions towards her father.

He had said nothing for which she had any right to condemn him.

She swallowed quietly at the thought and looked at him.

"I'm sorry. Thank you for your honesty. Can I have these documents?" She asked in a slightly hoarse voice.

He looked at her for a moment surprised, then nodded and reached for the folder lying next to him on the windowsill. He leaned towards her handing it to her.

She took it from him and saw that he had placed his elbows on the table, remained bent over, being closer to her. She smelled the scent of his perfume and aftershave, a pleasant, intense, masculine smell that made her head spin.

"Go over it calmly. You don't have to rush. My grandfather really cares about this and is willing to wait and read your version of the agreement if you want to present us with one." He said in a slightly softer, calmer tone, and she smiled gratefully at him and nodded.

"All right. Thank you." She said and squeezed her eyes shut as she heard her phone vibrate again.

She took it out and turned the sound off, putting it back in her purse. She saw that he was looking in that direction, involuntarily running his tongue over his lower lip.

"Someone doesn't understand the word 'no'?" He asked suddenly, and she looked at him surprised, not expecting him to dare ask anything private.

She could see that he too was surprised that the question had escaped his throat and swallowed loudly, waiting to see if she would answer him.

She lowered her gaze, embarrassed, not knowing how she would explain her situation without going into detail.

"In a way." She said finally, grabbing for her glass again, feeling that at the moment the one thing that could calm her down was alcohol.

"Mmm." Came out of his throat, he lowered his gaze for a moment, as if thoughtful. He reached for his glass and also took a sip of wine from it.

"Let's move to my room." He said suddenly, throwing her an intense, anxious look, and she felt a shiver pass through her.

Not a proposal, not a question.

A statement.

What was he planning?

She swallowed loudly.

What if he did something to her?

What if he hurt her?

It seemed to her that he saw all these questions on her face, because he pressed his lips together, playing with his glass in his hand.

"We can think together about what to answer to a man who won't let you alone." He suggested, lifting his gaze to her again, a challenge in his eye.

She swallowed loudly, playing nervously with her fingers resting in her lap, her heart pounding hard like crazy, the alcohol slowly humming in her head.

Have some fun, she heard her brother's voice in her head.

"All right."

_____

Taglist 1

@its-actually-minicika @notnormalthings-blog @nikstrange @zenka69 @bellaisasleep @k-y-r-a-1 @g-cf2020 @melsunshine @opheliaas-stuff @chainsawsangel @iiamthehybrid @tinykryptonitewerewolf @namoreno @malfoytargaryen @qyburnsghost @aemondsdelight @persephonerinyes @fan-goddess @sweethoneyblossom1 @watercolorskyy @astral-blossoms @randomdragonfires @apollonshootafar @padfooteyes @darylandbethfanforever9 @fudge13 @snh96 @rwdkarla @echos-muses @ipostwhtifeel @letmeloveyouuuu @yentroucnagol @valeskafics @tempt-ress @ahristata @menaosama @queenofshinigamis @dark-night-sky-99 @kate-to-the-ki

[garcargofarfar]

HIHHIHIIH I SAW YOUR REQUEST ARE OPEN

May I pretty please request some fluffy headcanons for Laurance x Garrorth x reader?

Also, may I pretty please be ⭐ anon?

Omg my first request on this blog! Thank you Anon <3 (I honestly thought the Aphmau community was dead) AND YES OMG I LOVE GARRANCE. I wasn't sure if you wanted this as in separately fighting for your love type or a threesome type. ALSO I wasn't sure if you wanted this set in PDH or MyStreet(or mcd but I haven't watched mcd) so..

Here have them all⭐️

- × - × - × - × - × - × - × -

Laurance x Garroth x Reader HEADCANONS

Laurance x Reader, Garroth x Reader, Garrance

Era of Pdh and MyStreet

- × - × - × - × - × - × - × -

LAURANCE X READER/GARROTH X READER (separate)

PDH

Garroth and Laurance, like with Canon Aph, will both end up falling for you

The two of them would fight for your attention, remaining a friendly competition, but never letting that get in the way of their friendship

Garroth would be the more responsible and caring one

Laurance would be the more popular and carefree one

The two would secretly come to a mutual agreement to share you until you decide who to get with

Meanwhile, they'd both go behind each other's backs and try to spend the most time with you

You have separate classes with them both, respectively, yet also, occasionally have a class with both of them together

Garroth isn't the type for too over-the-top pet names, he'd go for something simple like love, sweetheart, babe, etc.

Laurance doesn't care as much and does whatever he feels like

Both boys will screw over one another and give them false information, thinking you had no clue

Meanwhile, you were aware of everything listed above but just never admit it

MYSTREET

Remember what I said earlier about Garroth being the responsible one? Yeah, not anymore.

Garroth will eventually turn out to be the outgoing and goofy bundle of joy, but he knows when to be serious and when not to

Laurance is.. well, Laurance. He hasn't changed much since high school, but a tad bit more serious than he used to be to balance out Garroth's crazy mind

Both the boys would come over to find you occasionally at your house and refuse to leave, always finding excuses to be by your side

Eventually, they'll give in and work together, trying to get your attention together

Seeing as they live together, they hold meetings to plot out the perfect moments

L : "Oh, what a coincidence! Zane says he'd be home late."

G : "Would you mind if we stayed longer? To watch another movie?"

You : "We just watched all eight of the Harry Potter movies! Eight!"

GARRANCE X READER(threesome)

PDH

The two starts off surprised, learning that you're up to try a threesome

At first, it's hard to share you

Eventually, the two boys will learn to be gay asses and they'd purposely show each other more affection than to you to piss you off

You get pissed off

It takes them forever to get your attention and forgiveness, but knowing them, they'd pull this off again in less than two weeks time

MYSTREET

The boys are mature, they'll finally learn to share.

Until, of course, they start getting jealous of each other. Again.

Garroth is usually on your left and Laurance on your right

It doesn't mean anything, but it's become habit

Actually, a lot of things have become habit

Like watching movies with the two on the weekends, having one boy's head on your lap as your head lays on the others shoulders, arms wrapped around you

And then, comes Sprinkles.

Laurance uses Sprinkles as bait and gaslighting

You use Sprinkles as emotional support while the two fight over Garroth's love for Sprinkles

L : "GARROTH! SPRINKLES WILL BE VERY DISAPPOINTED IN YOU!"

G : "STOP BRINGING HER INTO THIS!"

You : *petting Sprinkles in your room* "Why are they like this."

Sprinkles : meow.

You : "I don't know what I see in those two idiots either."

- × - × - × - × - × - × - × -

[inkyycapp]

how i think characters would react

if you got (very) hurt: adventure time edition.

tw/cw : angst, fluff, blood, violence, gore?, terrible story building, implied romance, fionna and cake spoilers, a lot of cringe, self-indulgence, character hcs, etc...

[a/n: this is very sloppy and rush as i made this between classes so it's half edited half not and not at all proof read. forgive me. thank you for the love on my last posts!! i wasn't expecting my adventure time hcs to get the attention it did, thank you so much!! i have finished fionna and cake(twice) so, my hcs might slightly shift a bit. at the moment. thinking of cross posting on ao3. reader is usually always gender neutral in all my posts unless stated otherwise. that's all! i'm open to requests and my dms/pms are open. thank you! new additions as well!! this is all i have, i'm sorry. a few more are in the drafts. please tell me if i missed anything tag and cw/tw wise! thank you.]

[holy shit, fionna and cake's finn. honka honka. i don't deserve a platform.]

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

|| it all happened so fast. you could barely recall what happened. one moment you're up-right, after the next you're trying to pick yourself off the ground. your breathing grew more labored at every attempt, and the smell of iron hung heavy in the air. the warm liquid on your hands was a stark contrast to cold that began to wrack your body. it wasn't long 'til your vision faded to black, leaving only questions behind into your last fleeting thoughts. ||

finn.

(the favorite. my favorite.)

-the both of you were exploring an old cave. deep, dark, and damp. it was said to hold treasure far back into the cave, and out of curiosity you both went to explore. what you didn't know was that many people sought out that treasure. many dangerous people.

-going deeper into the cave, you and finn found the treasure, though nothing cool to take back except for a few cool rings. turning on your way out, with your back to the entrance, a sharp pain was felt through your body. looking down you saw the bloodied blade of a sword. you had no time to react as you were shoved off the blade and onto the ground. from there, it was a blur.

-finn would (violently) remove anyone involved. while brutal, he makes sure to end it quick--he doesn't have time for them when you're bleeding out on the ground.

-finn never stopped talking to you, even if you're asleep. it's always optimistic-- he talks about; new things he's found, friends he talked to recently, any new news, old and new stories, the next date he'll take you on, etc... he rambled hours on end in a one-sided conversation. it's how he copes.

-finn's trying to be uplifting. but, by himself he's a mess. he rarely stays at the treehouse because he's too restless. he feels weak, and unable to do anything. when finn's not at your side he's fighting through his feelings. finn had learned it wasn't healthy to use violence as his only outlet, but it makes him feel something that isn't the heavy stone in his chest when he sees you.

-he's a patient man, he knows you'll wake up soon. he just had to be patient. but after around a few days he doesn't want to be "patient" anymore. he wants you to wake up now. finn knows he can't make that happen, but it was a selfish want to keep himself going.

-when you did wake up, he was all over you. there wasn't a time when he wasn't with you, or at least in the same vicinity as you.

-good luck trying to pry yourself away from his arms. this man has fought monsters thrice his size for fun. even your prettiest please wasn't going to work, not this time. you almost died. you could've died and he couldn't do anything about it. those memories never left his brain basket, even when your recovery was going smoothly.

-very anxious about letting you tag along, but knows you'll probably go off on your own if he refuses to take you along. he feels it's safer to allow you to come along, rather than go off on your own. with him, he knows that at least this time he could do better. he won't ever have a repeat of last time.

-finn keeps you close during each adventure, even losing sleep watching the surroundings to be sure no one sneaks up on you. he will refuse to sleep, so you'd have to force him. please give this man all the reassurance, he really needs it. it won't stop his anxiety, or his fear of it happening again, but it puts him at ease. even if it's just a little bit, it helps, nonetheless.

-

fern.

-the green knight has plenty of enemies. of course, fern could protect himself, and you could do the same. however, even if you could protect yourself, there wasn't any chance to protect yourself getting jumped, and a dirty stab to the back. the most dishonorable way to lose to a foe. the amount of ever growing disrespect.

-he loses his shit. sure, he gets mad quickly, but if you were awake to see him like this: holy shit. he grows plentiful thorns, and poison flowers all over himself subconsciously. (he's actually very pretty like this.)

-he's livid, and you're not conscious to do anything about it. and that's just it, you're unconscious, bleeding out on the ground. fern couldn't quite process it just yet. normally you'd stop him from going too far, but you can't right now. that's supposed to never happen. he's confused and angry, and you're not waking up. you're not moving. so, he cuts down anyone involved in a quick motion. he doesn't care how brutal, as long as it's quick. fern wastes no time in picking you up (after managing the thorns and flowers) and taking you to doctor princess.

-fern can't stand seeing you like this. laying weakly on that hospital bed.

-if you think finn's not good at coping, fern is much worse. he doesn't even cope. he's just...there.

-he's so confused, and just shuts down a bit. like he's still there, he's still the green knight-- fern. but, he's just distant. not quite himself-- off.

-fern is unable to wrap his head around what happened to you, but he goes about his 'normal' life. he tries to just go about his casual life without you there, and he's just confused. it doesn't take long before he grows upset, allowing the rage to boil.

-'they used to do that.' 'this was their favorite color.' 'they were supposed to fix that.' 'they like bird houses.' everything reminds him of you. it's impossible to go a single day without a reminder that you're still unconscious.

-i think it gets more apparent when he's out and about as the green knight. he's more violent. but, he doesn't mean to be. it just...happens.

-he's likely not there when you first wake, but when he gets there fern's complaining about everything under his breath. but when he sees you up, that bed isn't just for you anymore.

-he's holding you close, with a firm hold and refusing to let go. he's scolding you for not waking up sooner, and complaining about how life without you was too different. he tried to be casual, but he missed you a bit too much.

-there is also no prying fern off of you-- a common thing between all of them. once you're up, there is no separating you both for a few hours at the least.

-fern is also hesitant about letting you rejoin him on the adventures, but as long as you stay close, and keep weapon on you at all times, he'll agree. but, all of your wounds-- every. single. one.-- had to be medically evaluated as ok, and no threat to your health before anything.

-

farmworld!finn.

(post crown -- pre fionna and cake.)

-he's in shock, not moving for a few moments. he knew why he'd be hated, or hunted down, killed even, but why you? why did they have to drag you into this?

-someone in the many gangs around the parts found you somewhere in the clearing waiting for finn. you both had previously planned a picnic out in a nice clearing in the woods. he was running late. but, once he found you bleeding out and onto grass, he's thrown way off guard.

-finn is quickly trying to pick you off the grass, trying to get you out of there, and dragging you back to his cabin. finn manages to tend to each of your wounds. though, the moment he's done, and you're in a stable condition-- he's leaving the cabin for a few hours.

-he finds whoever did this to you, and doing what he couldn't earlier. finn is driving in the same injuries they gave to you over and over again. he doesn't let up until he's in tears. finn knows that this changes nothing. he knows this won't make him feel better, but he needed to do something. anything. even if it's for his own sadistic pleasure to see the regret on their faces-- to see them like this. pathetically clawing at the dirt in an attempt to ground themselves through the pain-- trying to crawl away from his bloodied hands.

-(robot hand included.)

-finn leaves them with their lives(barely), and a warning before disappearing into the woods.

-he is struggling to cope. finn hold your hand in his abnormally cold one running his thumb over your knuckles. he's constantly checking in on you, and rarely leaving your side. sleeping, and eating could wait. after all that's happened with the crown, you're all he has left. he can't lose you too.

-he stays by your side as much as he can. finn knows he should probably take his mind off of...your condition and stay productive but it's difficult. the only reason the cabin is warm is because if it got too cold you'd start to shake. he makes food only because if you wake up you might be hungry.

-he doesn't know what to do for the most part, just waiting and hoping that you'll be better in no time. a fear lingers deep inside him that you'll worsen the moment he closes his eyes. so, finn stays up. there are times when he has passed out around the house, and when he wakes up he's absolutely terrified; running to check on you, checking to make sure your wounds haven't reopened, making sure you're alive.

-a deep seeded fear the you'll wilt away in his arms. it keeps him up at night-- it eats at him day by day.

-you're finally awake, but even then the fear doesn't fade. he's at you're every call so much that it begins to worry you.

-you'll have to force him, and i mean force him to sleep. you're ok, he's ok-- everything is ok. he can finally rest.

-he's just happy you're still there with him.

-

prismo.

-you? hurt? nope. not on his time watch. prismo has you out of the situation in seconds, without a scratch. he refuses to ever see you in any pain.

-though, hypothetically, if there's ever a time where you do get hurt, and your wounds cannot be fixed with his wish master magic, and he's "too late", he's not so well.

-you're on a comfy little bed in the wishing room, laying on top of him. your wounds are bandaged up, and cleaned, with your breathing finally stable.

-he never leaves you side once. (sensing a pattern in everyone.) it's either him, or a copy of him. when he's granting wishes to whoever manages to make it to his wishing room, he keeps you in the cube with a copy of himself to watch over you.

-tries to make small talk with your unconscious self...it doesn't go well. the owl visits more often only to lay it's eyes upon the slum prismo is in.

-the cosmic owl tries to ease the depression, though fails miserably. if jake is still alive; his visits, brings gifts, barber sessions, the whole mile for his other best bud. it does kinda help, even if it was just a bit-- but, he's greatful nonetheless.

-while he could be doing better, prismo is doing the best out of everyone to be honest(if jake is around). jake's visits have been more than helpful to this guy, and honestly without jake, he'd be worse than just a mess.

-when you wake up he doesn't believe it at first but he's ecstatic. there is never a time where he's not with you, talking your ear off on how horrible it was without you. and while prismo wants to contuine talking you to your grave, he can't deny hearing your voice after so long does wonders to him.

-bonus if jake's around and prismo's like "and i like...really miss her. y'know? like she's right there but she's not..." "no, dude, i get it..." "i'd kill just to hear her voice just once..." "...prismo..." "ah, shit now i'm hallucinating!!" "no prismo, behind you." "jake, don't play into my delusions!" "god dammit prismo." "YOU'RE AWAKE!? FINALLY."

scarab.

-this man is already insane. he already needs therapy. the anger issues on this psychotic man are insane.

-he loses all sense of morality(that he had left) but surprisingly holds off and tends to you first. by sending you back to headquarters for someone to tend to your injuries while scarab spends the next few hours tearing their molecules apart.

-honestly the worst out everyone. like, if he has a chance to off someone, they're going to die but in the most unconventional, painful, most gruesome way possible. he's....coping?

-at this point it's hard to tell with him, one moment he's rambling under his breath about annoyances, the next....he's offically lost it!!

-sadly he can't be at you're side at all times even if he really wants to, but with his job and all that. when given any chance he's right there next to you. he excuses this behavior as protecting you against anyone who might try anything, but in reality: it's just hard to stay away when you're like this. he wants to stay close even if he can't sometimes.

-scarab has difficulties with intimacy, so he finds it difficult to express his concern the "right" way. others see him as uneffected, and taking it too easy, but he is genuinely scared. he's scared that he loses the one person who can see him for what he is. an emotionally fucked up person who can't stand rule breakers.(joking).

-he finds holding your hand a way to ease the tension.

-when you wake up, he just sitting there, holding your hand.

-he's never letting you go anywhere without a weapon three times your size. of course he teaches you how to use it, but just because he wants you to protect yourself when he cannot. scarab views your injuries as him failing as a partner in more ways than one. he should've made sure you could protect yourself even when he couldn't.

-later on after your wounds have healed you're allowed with him on his missions. he denies being scared. reassure him anyways, he really needs it.

e/n: sorry prismo's and scarab's are short! first time writing them :')

[faces-ofvenus]

Hii, love everything you write! What about Aegon/Aemond having a crush on the same girl? ;)

Thank you for loving my writing, I hope you enjoyed it.

This would almost be a war, especially if we think about Aemond's point of view, he could very well in extreme situations try to kill his brother, that is if it was something Yandere (until when it is not, this boy is a Yandere even if he doesn't want to).

Both of them would try everything to fight each other, especially since childhood, in childhood it was much easier for Aegon to flirt and hit on you, he was like sincerely a breath of almost freedom running away with you right and left, he would provoke his brother in every way, stating several times that he would marry you, and not Aemond, it is pretty easy to know the little relationship between the two, even though Aegon is Aegon, you treat him with such kindness and gentleness, that maybe Alicent never gave you, so he would not be willing to give in or share that with his brothers, (another Yandere).

As I said in another blog, Aemond's flirting methods in childhood were quite simple, he would give you small things, none as extravagant as Aegon, something like flowers etc, he is shy, but what brings you two together, maybe it is the love for reading and art, usually Aegon doesn't even know about your relationship, he doesn't know about the sweet words Aemond speaks to you in the readings, and maybe it would be better this way, if not physical fights between the two would break out, they try to show each other how much better the other is.

In adult life everything tends to get worse, first because Aemond is no longer the shy and cute boy he used to be, and this kind of makes him open space for several provocations, and even wedding jokes, something that irritates his brother too much, Aegon wanted to be the only one who could have this affection, the only one who could draw smiles from you, the only one who could attract looks from you, no one else, and your brother wouldn't change that, your outings would really change, both of them on different nights calling you to fly with their dragons, no wonder both Sunfyre and Vhagar love you, the familiarity even allows you to pet them both, which makes them both jealous of each other.

If you in the end chose Aegon, Aemond would be devastated, he still had certain insecurities towards all this, even if his poker face, and his confident personality disguised a lot, but in your presence he could take off his eye patch, talk like the shy and gentle child he was, and he honestly as I said in the beginning thought about killing Aegon, but he knew for sure that you would never forgive him, and he wouldn't have it anyway, that doesn't stop him from threatening your brother, Aegon would be totally virtuous at that moment, to feel your lips knowing that you belong to him, the next day there's a beautiful emerald necklace on the headboard of his room, with a small letter that is very badly made, but that he tried very hard to be romantic.

If you chose Aemond, Aegon would be almost in a blind rage, most of his furniture ended up broken, he would drink more than before, which in itself is already worrying, more and more lascivious what kept him sincerely from not being with the maids was the fact that he thought that in the future he could have you, but now he'll never have you, all because of that damn one-eyed man, comments can be unleashed, some not so nice, he just holds an eternal grudge, both for Aemond and for you and everyone who influenced his choice. Aemond would be in the clouds, he would literally fly you out with Vhagar, they would land in a flowery field with some books in a small briefcase you brought, he would kiss you in such a shy way he just wasn't used to it, being king didn't matter so much anymore, he would have you, his queen at least in his mind, you were like a queen a true goddess.

If you happen to decide to stay with both of them, your beastly competitions never ceased, obviously you had to marry one, but in both of their mouths you were theirs, what is better than the protection of one dragon is the devotion of two, they are overprotective, and extremely competitive, like who leaves the most hickeys on you and etc, I don't doubt that one or two of their children, are either with Aegon or Aemond, and honestly neither of them could know whose is which, and I don't think they would care, you were theirs, and only theirs, anyone who dared to get in your way, could be burned and seconds.