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#and now that its actually on the horizon its like. oh i actually have to figure that out and make it real
l-cereta · 1 year
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in a bad mood for multiple unrelated reasons :thumbsup:
#dooooooo i vent in the tags#yk what why shouldnt i#ok so. for one my executives have been dysfunctioning since monday and i think rn is the event horizon of 'oh my god if u dont work now'#and you know what ive been doing instead of working? watching a 24hr stream of armored core 6#so thats like. whatever#its the whole too depressed to do anything so you kinda vegetate which lowers ur energy even further and worsens your mood#but then a friend wanted to get my advice on like. relationship troubles hes having#and i just . was not able to connect at all. and it's like man sometimes im not even sure if i have emotions lmao#like i pride myself on Being In A Better Place Than I Was In Highschool#(like. im not considering jumping out the window every other morning)#but like. sometimes it feels like i just dont like#like other people have these rich experiences and deep loves and all this stuff and im never gonna get it#it'd be nice to be loved or be in a relationship but really like#my biggest fear is just. im in a relationship and something bad happens to my partner#and i realize i dont care#idk theres like a lot swirling in my brain#i just want to be like...#i think writing this out has actually made it worse lmao#god forbid if someones reading this please dont reach out to me abt it i do not want to talk abt it#no matter how much other people say they care abt me it never seems real anyways so like cool#god i was doing so well before going back to college and im stupid enough to actually fucking like school#i just like.#whatever#like being alive really hurts right now#i cant really put a bow on that
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yupyupppippi · 2 years
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sometimes Sundays are chill and sometimes there's so much to do that you're paralyzed and do none of it
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star2fishmeg · 3 months
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ᴜɴᴅᴇʀ ᴡʀᴀᴘs
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[4.4k] Pairing | bsf!Luke Hughes x bsf!afab!reader Summary | luke and y/n are tired of feeling left behind and help each other out…but in the company of their friends. but it makes a good story, right? Warnings | 18+ smut, kinda slow start, best friends to lovers, long haired luke!!! Bc I love long hair, umich!luke, (basically public) fingering, swearing, appearance and sex insecurities, tiny bit of angst but not really, mutual pining, making out Authors Note | im in such a luke brainrot it’s painful, this was supposed to be a blurb but I can’t control myself but anyway, this is my first hockey fic i hope its alright. Based on this after hours post! This is a work of fiction, please remember that my dudes
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Luke felt like a creep. But she looked so at peace sitting on the lake's docks, feet dangling and toes skimming the water's surface. While she was nothing but a silhouette in the distance, the sunset cascading on the horizon complimenting her like a portrait in a museum. He also wasn’t sure on how long he’d been standing at the sliding patio doors, the UMich boy’s voices blended out into a white noise while his mind wandered to crevices of thoughts he’d been avoiding for months, but anything to escape Ethan and Luca’s conversations about girlfriend stories. Yes, he was happy for them, found it cute in fact, but when was it his turn to have that chapter in his life? He could have it if he didn’t panic and fumble at every party they threw, just a bit more alcohol and maybe he’d have a chance but like all victims of tragedy, no one would ever be her. Could ever replace her or even substitute her. So, while his curls bounced in the gentle breeze, Luke Hughes admired the only girl in the University of Michigan that’s ever made his heart ache and contort in bittersweet ways.
With a firm slap to his back, Luke’s daydream snapped back to reality, to Dylan Duke grinning and wiggling his eyebrows. The most painful thing Dylan had to endure since he met Luke was watching his friend follow y/n like a lost puppy begging for attention, and there was nothing more he wanted than for the two to just kiss already. They almost did, once, at someone’s birthday party when they both nursed a bottle of tequila. But Dylan never told them that, he wasn’t entirely sure if he dreamt it, if he was honest.
“Just go talk to her, be honest,” Dylan said with a light chuckle, nudging Luke towards the porch steps.
Luke’s legs stopped stiff, and spun to face Dylan in protest, “No! What do I even say? ‘Oh, hey y/n I know we’ve been friends for a while, but I’m in love with you haha hope this doesn’t make it awkward’? Like, come on.” With the way Dylan’s grin turned almost menacing, Luke felt his heart almost stop, his stupidity catching up with him, “This stays between us, Duker.”
He groaned and watched Dylan giggle his way back inside. Wingman or menace? Fine line, but at least he was better than Jack. Who quite literally tried trapping him and y/n in a closet when he found out, hoping for the best. Perhaps Dylan would actually help him get somewhere, he’d spent many parties coaxing Luke into making a move but Luke being the humble soul he took pride in, let her have her peace. Oh, how much he regretted it every time he heard her laugh because of another guy.
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Thankfully the docks were at the far end of his garden, out of earshot and almost out of sight, if you weren’t spying. He stood silently, just taking in her very existence alone. If she weren’t wearing his hoodie so proudly, he would’ve sat down by now but the heat that flushed into his cheeks prominently just had to ease before he could show his face. Maybe she’d find it cute that his face flushed so easily, or maybe she’d think he was a fool for thinking he had a chance. Girls were hard to read, so many codes and hints, he couldn’t keep up with them all and God forbid you had an ugly code name. Watching her like that did raise the thought, what was his code name? Did he really want to know?
“I can feel you starin’,” her voice chimed, their eyes meeting as she craned her neck, “you gonna join or just stand?”
Luke’s lips pulled into his famous half-smirk, “I like lookin’ at pretty things, can you blame a man?” He sat next to her, thigh to thigh, shoulder to shoulder like they usually did, the weight of his boldness lifting off his chest. “What’s runnin’ through that mind of yours?”
“Who said I was thinking about anything? Maybe I was finally catching a break from the zoo. Maybe I was thinking that you need a haircut.” Her laugh was like music to his ears, her voice his favourite song and every word that rolled off her tongue felt like ecstasy surging through him and freezing the world around them.
Spending a summer in a lake house was the only way y/n ever wanted to live. An oasis of serenity and laughs, endless memories, and an escape. But while she dipped her toes in the water, watching her reflection ripple, the everlasting thought that it was fleeting crawled its way back to the surface whether she wanted it to or not. The boys had been doing this longer than she had, it was her first time at the lake house and possibly her last. But there was nothing wrong with enjoying it while it lasted, being trapped under the same roof as the boys wasn’t as bad as she’d assumed. Except for the smells, they were straight-up disrespectful. Would she still love it as much if she was with other friends? Hard to say, if Luke was there, everything would be fine. Maybe a couple more girls would’ve been nice too, though.
“Please, you’re staring blankly, don’t try me.” Luke scoffed playfully, shoulder gently nudging hers as she rolled her eyes, unable to resist a gleaming smile. As much as she wanted to rebuttal, he was right. They’d met on the first week of university, Luke starting hockey practice and y/n starting as their new social girl and since then the pair of them had been two peas in a pod. Completely enamoured with each other, attached at the hip, where Luke went, he’d bring y/n, his person.  “Wait, you think I need a haircut? Is it that bad?”
She laughed, Luke, stooping so she could thread her fingers through his unruly curls gently, something only she was allowed to do, “Nah, I like your hair long, cut it and I’ll cut you.” They pulled back, sitting in their original postures and watched the sun’s pinks fade to oranges, “I was thinking about how many girls you’ve brought here.”
He blinked twice, turning his head slowly to face her and to his surprise his eyes met hers. There was a gloss to them, illuminated brightly by the sunset but like glass as if she were about to break. Heart beating in his ears, he licked his lips, almost quivering when he began to speak.
“Just you.” His voice just above a whisper, husky, “Only you. Always you.” Their gazes lingered, and his eyes fluttered to her lips for just a split second before he found himself licking his lips again, feeling his throat dry at the way her eyes crinkled when she smiled. His heart ached, he didn’t have half the guts the Fantilli brothers did, if he had then maybe he would’ve at least wrapped his arm around her. Instead, he sat like he was paralysed, just shoulder to shoulder as she rubbed her bare foot against his leg, their skins touching, lighting little fires up his body and his stomach gaining a warmth he’d only felt in the after-hours of his bedroom.
“Lu?” she rested her head on his shoulder, staring back out towards the horizon, “Do you ever feel like you’re so far behind the people around you? Like you’re missing out.”
Luke leaned his head against hers, almost nuzzling into it as he thought. It was a heavy question, one that’d been weighing on her for a while. Or he assumed, considering she’d never openly asked the group. That’s what made him feel special. Her feet hung still, ending their teasing game and just fell limp. He exhaled, could he let his pride go and agree? Or could he completely one-up himself and disagree, which made him braver? He loathed the storms she started in him, thoughts he never imagined he would think in his hockey brain. One girl could change his entire train of thought, change his heartbeat, change his mood. One woman he pined like a lost puppy over.
“Sometimes. What do you mean?”
“Like, all my friends have these insane hook-ups and embarrassing sex stories and I have nothing. Yeah, I’ve had boyfriends before, but I was younger and stupid then. I go out with my friends and I’m basically invisible to any guy who approaches us, just feel unlovable. And now here I am, twenty years old and a fucking virgin with little experience and no wild stories.” She vented, barely taking a breath as the words spilt from her mouth. Luke’s chest twisted, his face softening when she snuggled into his side. “I don’t know where I’m going wrong, Lu.”
He paused and bit his lip when he wrapped his arm around her shoulders, pulling her body into his chest. She melted into his touch, getting a whiff of his woody, amber cologne, her favourite one at that, the one he always wore. She’d never had the chance to properly relish in his touch, was his chest always this firm? Arms always bring this much security? Fuck, when did his hand get so sexy when on her body, gliding down her arm to nestle in the curve of her waist. With her ear pressed to him, the thundering in his chest surrendered his cover entirely. Cool and collected Luke Hughes was secretly a bumbling mess.
“I get you.” he finally spoke, ears burning when her finger traced shapes on his thigh, “My entire life has been hockey, so not a lot of space for experiences either. Not enough time for relationships between practice and games, development camps and time with family. A lot of the girls who liked me didn’t really like that. That or they liked my brothers and friends more, they are a lot more attractive than me, so I don’t blame them. M’just average.”
Y/n pulled away almost instantly, her eyebrows knitted and jaw agape. For a moment she thought she heard him wrong, ‘a lot more attractive than me’, ‘just average’? Delving into Luke’s psyche turned out to be an entirely different road trip than she had thought, heartstrings tugged as her lips fell to a frown. Who in the world made him feel like that? Who did she need to hunt down? But then again, Luke’s blood boiled hearing how insignificant she felt and who exactly made her think that to start with?
“Luke Hughes you are not average! You’re the hottest guy I know!” she yelped, the hand that drew gentle patterns now clutching his thigh tight. Luke gulped but didn’t retract away from the noise. His brain was too busy short-circuiting over the fact her fingers were dangerously close to his crotch, doing his best to contain himself with slow breaths, “They just didn’t give you a chance, if they really knew you, they’d be heads over heels. You’re so fucking smart, and passionate. And-and if they saw you smile for real, not a half-smile, your full smile with your teeth, the one that feels like a warm summer’s day. It’s their loss, they’ll never know how sweet you are, that after a bad game, you want steak and head scratches, that you’re sentimental as fuck- like you wear that Yankees hat because Quinn got it for you when you fell ill and couldn’t make the game. You’re not average.”
Luke blinked, once, twice and thrice as her eyes bored into his, glazed with fire as the words tumbled from her mouth and circled his head. He watched the way her body rose and fell as she caught her breath, the grip on his thigh tightening and heat rising through his body. He felt the sweat building on the back of his neck, his collar suddenly becoming too tight. She thought he was hot? She remembered such little details about him like they’d known each other since they were kids. The hand around her waist slid to her lower back, his thumb rubbing the fabric of her (his) hoodie unconsciously.
He smiled, his warm smile she mentioned, where his eyes wrinkled and his chin tilted up triumphantly, “The hottest guy you know, huh?”
Y/n’s face dropped. Never in her life had she experienced her heart stop the way it did hearing those words. She stared like a deer in headlights, she slipped up and the heat rushing to her cheeks burned. This is what happens when you let your feelings take over, you make a fool of yourself in front of the one person who would never want to. She sighed, hung her head and hid her face in her hands, the butterflies in her stomach choking her when Luke let out a saccharine chuckle that made all the flowers bloom.
Large, warm hands wrapped around her wrists with a feather touch, and slowly pulled her hands away from her face and into her lap, soothing her nerves with a gentle rubbing of her knuckles with his thumbs. Although his hands felt clammy, the tingling in his stomach became too addicting to care about it too much anymore.
“Don’t hide,” she was radiant under what was left of the tangerine hues, eyes almost sparkling, “let me see that pretty face.”
She hesitantly raised her head, eyes meeting his and her body relaxed. She had no idea why she was so embarrassed, he hadn’t gagged, laughed in her face nor had he physically repulsed. Instead, he looked at her like she’d hung out the stars for him, wide eyes with rose-tinted ears.
“I think you’re very pretty too. Beautiful even, I-“ he hesitated, “you have no idea how many times I’ve thought about kissing you, asking you out. Honestly, the idea of you rejecting me is terrifying so I never did, plus, I’ve never kissed anyone before, and I didn’t wanna fuck it up.”
Her eyes fluttered to his lips, the world around them falling silent until it was just them in their own bubble. Luke gulped, his eyeline following the way she flickered between his eyes and his mouth before he found their bodies leaning into one another, noses ghosting. His hands released her wrists, one arm snaking around her waist sending an electric tingle through her veins and holding her firmly close. They’d been this close before, sure. Multiple occasions of having his arms around the back of the sofa they sat snug on, arm hooked around her shoulders because some guy couldn’t get the memo at bars, in fact, the root cause of their problem was undeniably because everyone assumed they were together except them.
Y/n’s palm held his cheek tenderly, the hot, carnal desire to devour the boy only being released from its cage when he melted into her touch as if he was opening his doors to vulnerability.
“I can teach you if you like,” she whispered, her thumb tracing across his bottom lip. Luke’s fingers gripped her waist as if she couldn’t be any closer than she already was, but he couldn’t risk letting her slip from his grasp again. He wanted to erase all those other guys who’d kissed her, he would be the last guy on Earth to taste the lips that words and giggles laced with a honey-like sweetness that cradled his heart.
“God, please-“  his heart beat twice as fast, y/n leaning in, closing the gap between them and pressing her lips gently to his. If he were to die right there, he’d die the happiest man alive. Her lips were soft and warm, igniting every firework inside of him and adrenaline shaking him back to life. He could do this for hours, drinking in her citrus fragrance, lips mimicking the way she moved hers against his. If she was a match, he was kerosene and he’d let her set him ablaze over and over if it meant he could feel like the only man in the world until the end of time.
They pulled away, eyes fluttering open to an exchange of giggly smiles. Despite it being a closed-mouth kiss, nothing extra, just soft and sweet, Luke’s thoughts raced at a million miles per hour. All the weight on his shoulders lifted and he nuzzled into her palm, placing a kiss on it.
Y/n raised an eyebrow, his puppy-like gaze almost distracting her from how his skin burned pink in her palm. But in a way, all her previous anxieties dissipated like dust in the wind, tummy flipping at the pathetically sweet and lovestruck expression spread on Luke’s face, “Your face is so red. Are you okay?-”
“-Can we do that again?” He pleaded, quickly, desperately, a certain yearning feeling on his lips that he couldn’t quite describe, except that he needed to taste her again. He needed more, so much more to quench his thirst, a kind of fuzziness he felt in his core.
“Uh- yeah, let me show you what a real kiss is.” No hesitation was needed, y/n’s hand slid from his cheek to the nape of his neck, fingers carding through his curls as she roughly connected their lips again, messier, teeth chattering from the impact. Luke’s other hand found comfort on her thighs, pulling them over his lap and giving gentle squeezes, moaning when y/n bit his lower lip. He opened his mouth with ease, failing to hold back another moan when her tongue lapped his. He wasn’t sure how to react, he’d never made out with anyone and it’s not like his brothers would’ve explained it well either. So, he repeated her movement, his tongue dancing with hers with saliva lubricating their lips each time they dove back in to devour each other. Y/n tugged his curls lightly, pulling him closer, savouring the kindling arousal leaking into her panties with the way he craved her.
Luke pulled away to breathe, his chest heavy but shorts becoming tight with the intense and fiery eye contact that screamed nothing but lust, “You,” he kissed her again, fervently, “taste,” another kiss, “amazing.” He mumbled into her lips and their tongues stirred again, whimpers drawing from the back of her throat when his hand travelled further up her thigh, under her shorts and found solace on the skin only he could touch. Any further and she couldn’t promise she wouldn’t pounce, her underwear was soaked through and sticking to her folds and even one measly brush on her clit would open the floodgates.
A foreign burst of confidence washed over him, and he detached their lips, a string of saliva between them and her hand still tugging at his curls and whether intentional or not, he discovered something carnal clawing away inside him. Wetting his lips, he dove into her neck, planting wet kisses along her column and nipping in the hope of hearing her mewl again. Y/n tilted her head to the side, giving him free rein over her skin and her jaw slacking, whining his name with her thighs clenching together for any kind of friction. As he began to run his hand along her thigh, his pocket vibrated continuously, earning a growl to rumble from his throat.
“Fuck, why’d you stop?” y/n whined, hand falling from his hair to his chest. Luke pulled his phone from his pocket with a disgruntled look, of course, his moment was ruined. Swiping the notification away, he clicked his tongue, sliding his phone back into his shorts.
His arms wrapped around her waist, and looked back into her adoring yet disappointed eyes, “Dylan wants to know if we’re joining them for a movie.”
“I’m quite happy staying here with you.”
“Who says we have to watch the whole movie?”
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Silence hung over the living room, only the TV blaring and the light crunching of popcorn from different directions. The lights were off, just the TV and three boys crammed on one sofa, and three plus y/n on the other. Luke, y/n, Rutger and Adam on the sectional directly opposite the TV, Luke occupying the end with the chaise for his legs, and y/n sat between them and huddled under a blanket. Rutger sat in the middle with Adam on the furthest end. Dylan, Luca and Ethan huddled together on the sofa adjacent to the TV, popcorn littered between them from missing mouths and flinching.
Luke’s hands wrapped around her waist, keeping her snug against his chest while she slowly chewed Haribo’s, feeding them to him now and then. While his heart skipped beats, feeling like a meadow of tulips blooming in the Spring, y/n’s wiggling against his crotch lured all the heat and butterflies from earlier straight back to his stomach, sending it into twists and turns. Heat flushed to his neck when she pushed her arse back into him, in an innocent attempt to readjust. A deep exhale through his nose and his hands slithered to her thighs, fingers kneading the flesh like dough as his head dipped into her shoulder, breath hot on the skin and making her hairs stand on edge.
“Stop wigglin’, pretty girl,” he whispered into the shell of her ear, placing a kiss, “you’re drivin’ me crazy.”
She froze, body falling limp into his as he ran his hands under her hoodie, his stiffened cock poking into her backside as she caught on to what his problem was. The sex-deprived whore in her awakened with a jolt, his cock solid because of her, and there was nothing she wanted more than to feel him pressed up against her, unable to find his release and have the rasp of his voice reverberate through her being as her vibrator. 
“And if I don’t?” she whispered back, as close to him as possible without being heard. Instead of answering, Luke dipped his fingers down her shorts, middle finger brushing against her clothed clit. His eyes locked to the screen in front of him, resisting the urge to smirk when her breath hitched but continuing to glide his finger – in what was a lucky guess – over her bundle. She squirmed, clamping her thighs together, only to have them pried open by his free hand.
“Be a good girl and keep quiet, unless you want to be caught.” His playful tone sent chills down her spine, goosebumps swarming on her neck but melting into his touch. She plopped another sweet into her mouth, chewing intensely when Luke drew his long fingers away, only for her to feel them caress over her skin, cold on her warm body, and down her panties. To describe the sensation that zipped through her when the pad of his middle finger reunited with her clit would be the same shock if you were to be struck by lightning: sudden and sharp, rattling up the spine.
Y/n placed the bag of sweets in her lap, tucking both hands under the blanket with the hope of seeming less suspicious, but her hand skimmed down his arm and placed itself on his, slowly guiding his movements on her nub until he got the idea. Firm yet gentle circular movements, the slick seeping from her warm on his fingertips, so inviting he wished he could have a taste. She pulled the blanket to her chin, not only to cover Luke’s sudden mood but to form some form of distraction from the fuzzy feeling rising to her head. No, she’d never had this before, so the experience itself embraced her tight, addicting like nicotine.
He kissed her temple, two fingers sliding into her cunt almost perfectly, too perfect that another Haribo was abused between her teeth as her breathing struggled to remain neutral. The moan that would’ve slipped past if she hadn’t been concentrating would’ve been embarrassing enough. Luke began languid plunges into her, relishing in the way her walls squeezed his fingers tight, keeping shallow at first. The more her pussy swallowed him in their wetness, the faster his mind spiralled in greed and his pace sped up, y/n’s nails digging deep into his leg, leaving crescent shapes on the skin. The heat pooling in her stomach was riveting, knowing she would finally have an insane story to tell even more so. No one could say that Luke Hughes’ tongue tasted theirs like it was the best meal he’d ever lapped up and that he’d watched a movie with his friends while pushing the limits of both his and their sanity publicly.
With a rush of adrenaline and her nails marking him, he buried his fingers deep into her cunt, driving swiftly and curling in places that made her wriggle against him, his free hand having to hold her hips still with a bruising grip and his cock begged for attention in his shorts. Y/n popped two more sweets in her mouth, relying on their gummy nature to suppress the moans that threatened to tear through her as the knot inside her came dangerously close to snapping with the way he bullied her pussy with his bare hands. His breathing fell deep and shuddered, his heart infatuated with the ecstasy of finger-fucking the woman of his dreams in front of an entire room of his friends hammered in his chest while his face struggled to stay indifferent and jaw tight like his cock isn't throbbing violently and straining against her arse. Like she wasn’t bucking her hips into his touch like he couldn’t tell that her heart was going haywire because of just him alone. If this was what foreplay was like, the idea of piledriving balls deep in her until she couldn’t remember her name was divine.
He dragged out his last pumps, the knot in her stomach snapping and coating his fingers in hot, sticky release, kissing her temple upon her body physically shuddering. Y/n pulled the blanket up to her chin as if she had shivered naturally, stuffing her mouth into the fluffy material. Luke pulled his fingers out, wiping the residue on his shorts, practically drooling over the image of milking her dry. His arms snaked around her waist, snuggling close. Y/n sighed, slumping back into him. On the outside Luke was his collected and cool self, his breathing stable and attention on the movie, the heat in his face and hands that rested on her stomach, soothing her heart rate screamed that he was the happiest guy in the room. With every gentle stroke of his thumb on the flesh of her stomach, her heart soothed and her eyelids became increasingly heavier.
"Was that story worthy?" He whispered, kissing her cheek sweetly.
Luke’s pocket buzzed and he tutted, carefully sliding it from his pocket and unlocking it, trying his best to prevent the screen from blinding everyone.
Duker idk if ur freaky or brave u dog
Luke closed his phone and looked up towards Dylan, who sat with a shit-eating grin. He smiled and shook his head, mouthing a subtle, ‘this stays between us’.
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theminecraftbee · 5 months
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The moon has fully set over the horizon. The howling over the server has stopped. Four Hermits sit in a circle, staring just slightly away from each other, as to not be caught staring. Joe is miserably trying to wring mud out of his puppet. Stress isn't bothering about the mud at all but is despairing at how shredded her jumper is. Somehow, Zedaph has only lost a shoe, which is more concerning than any of the prior people. Xisuma is deliberately not checking himself. The damning lack of helmet on his head, though, means he can't avoid feeling how he underwent the same terrible transformation as everyone else.
"So," he says, finally.
"I could use pants," Joe says, finally giving up on washing out his puppet, and, ah. Yes. Those are pretty well destroyed, aren't they? Xisuma looks away politely, feeling his face heat up. It heats up more when he realizes everyone can see it, gosh, he's–he's not so sure how he feels about that–
"I think we all need pants. Look at us," Stress says, and if Xisuma can be looking away any harder, he sure is now. Wait, she said 'all', does that include... Oh, oh dear.
"Well I don't know about you, but I still have perfectly serviceable pants," Zedaph says imperiously.
"You know, if anything, that's weirder, given the way we were all giant wolves traipsing around in the night just now. Which is strange itself! However, wolves don't normally wear pants, so really, the fact the only article of clothing you've lost is your shoes is less miraculous and more actively impossible!" Joe responds.
"Well you're actively impossible," mutters Zedaph.
"My god, it was real," Xisuma says.
"Well, I mean, I sort of figured it had to be, what with the four of us being all covered in mud and tired and your helmet being gone and all that," Stress says.
"It was real," Xisuma says.
The four of them sit in silence a little longer. The sun continues its steady march upwards into the sky. It's April; the day is longer than the night, by now, so they aren't wasting but so much time compared to the time the moon was up. The time the moon was up feels a bit more like a dream than anything else, too; distantly, Xisuma wonders if this is what spiders feel like when they become angry during the night, or what drives the undead from the ground. It's a disquieting thought, and he'd literally lived in a skeleton!
"So," Joe says. "So. Which one of us is going to yell at Zedaph for biting us?"
"Rude!" Zedaph says. "Very rude, I'm not the one that bit you! You bit me! Xisuma bit me, actually, you all saw him!"
"What? No, I didn't!" Xisuma says. "Gosh, if I were a werewolf, don't you think you'd know by now?"
"Hm. Suspicious," Zedaph says.
"No?" Xisuma says.
"I mean, I'd try to claim it was my fault, what with being a monster and all, but I'm actually a different sort of beastie normally," Stress says. "Being all doggy is new for me. I should show Iskall. Hey, do you think I should bite Iskall?"
"Yes," Zedaph says.
"No," Xisuma says.
"I'll split the difference and say maybe," Joe says. "Also, since we're arguing about it anyway, I'll say that I think I'd remember if I bit someone, although maybe I wouldn't. It's been a weird night. Maybe I should just go ahead and get everyone apology gifts instead?"
"Please don't," Zedaph says.
"Aww, but I like his gifts," Stress says.
"Honestly, yeah, I was–no, Zedaph is right, it'd be too distracting," Xisuma says, thinking of many of the, er, gifts he's gotten from Joe in the past. "Besides, it's not your fault. But if none of us bit anyone, then why on earth are we all werewolves no–oh no."
"That was ominous?" Joe says.
"Oh. Ohhhhhh," Zedaph says. "Whoops."
"It was supposed to be a joke about investment bankers," Xisuma says.
"Wait, what, do you really think the silly name turned us into werewolves?" Stress says.
"I had other season plans, Xisuma!" Joe says.
"Hey, does that make me a sheep in wolf's clothing that's also a wolf that turns into a sheep that turns into a wolf? If so, neat," Zedaph says.
"Do you know how annoying it will be to get a werewolf puppet?" Joe says.
"Gosh, I absolutely have to bite Iskall now," Stress says.
Xisuma, for a moment, considers putting a stop to it. If it really is the silly name, the collective, the hats and the howls–if it really is the collective weight of story bearing down on all of them–then really, it's still so early that it would be very easy to stop.
Xisuma considers the competition the rest of the shopping district poses, and how easy it will be to move as a collective when they're also a pack.
Also, he hasn't actually been a wolf before. That's one mob he hasn't done!
"You should bite Iskall. I want to know what it does," Xisuma says, deciding that he's quite bored with being responsible and that if someone wants to stop it, it will have to be not him. "But, er, first, in the meantime, do you think he or Doc is better to ask for a helmet that'll grow to fit my muzzle instead of nearly trapping my skull?"
"Hm," Stress says. "Well, Iskall is pretty good at head electronics."
"Yeah, but Doc is a better choice for abominations against nature!" Joe says.
"What about me? I like abominations," Zedaph says.
"It's okay, Zedaph, it's just you don't make many helmets, is all," Xisuma says. "We'll run around being abominations of nature, gosh, most full moons together. Is that good enough?"
"Fine," Zedaph says. "I'm bringing the snacks. I have sheep, and I've always wanted to try cannibalism."
"I guess werewolves wouldn't have to worry about prions," Joe says, nodding.
"Well, if you're going to get Doc, I'm going to go bite Iskall. I know I don't got fangs right now but it'll be very funny either way," Stress says.
"Have fun!" Xisuma says, and even though he's still red, and no one has pants but Zedaph, and he feels vaguely sick without his helmet, he also feels something close to pure delight. Gosh. Werewolves, huh? What a concept, having a little pack. He'll have to make the most of it; they've already seen his face anyway, and not one of them have commented or looked him in the eyes. Clearly, it won't matter so much if Doc takes a while with the helmet.
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shunsuiken · 28 days
Text
cw. gn!reader + you are a rather shy lover & sunday thinks its the cutest thing ever + kinda ooc + set in pre-version 2.2
sunday looks… far too handsome for a gala. it’s actually baffling how he captures your attention like no other being on penacony—or even the entire universe in fact! his shimmery golden eyes resemble a warm horizon and his voice is smooth and soothing like honey. but that smile… oh, that smile—it stirs a storm of butterflies in your belly and muffles the sound of people in the hall.
you gaze at him softly from where you stand, partially participating in conversation with guests. he’s really gone all out for this gala, huh… you’re snapped out of your thoughts the second your name is mentioned, immediately you giving the guest a smile to acknowledge what they’ve said, and then offer some input on what they were talking about.
when the conversation allows you to withdraw, you find yourself looking for sunday again. but he’s not where he was standing at earlier—he’s gone somewhere else! you unknowingly pout at the thought of this, folding your hands in front of yourself neatly as you try to search for your lover.
“i could feel your stare from a mile away, my dearest,” sunday chuckles lightly, a free hand caressing your back to comfort you. “have you found who you were looking for?” he raises a brow cheekily, amusement laced in his tone.
you jump slightly at the sudden presence of a person, then relax when you realise it’s your lover. you lean in a little closer, happy you’ve found who you’ve been searching for before awkwardly tearing your gaze away from him after considering how much your face must have brightened up. oh how embarrassing…
sunday watches your entire thought process from start to finish on the look on your face, having to stifle a laugh behind his gloved hand. “i’m afraid your expressions are as transparent as glass,” he hums, tilting his head to meet your timid gaze. “were you looking for me?”
you want to slide under the table and make yourself home there. there’s nowhere for you to run when you’re in sunday’s arms! your cheeks are lit aflame at how he stares at you—observing every inch of your features and how they twitch or curl because of him.
“no, i wasn’t—i simply was taking note of how well dressed everyone happened to be tonight!” you elaborate, obviously lying. sunday sees right through you.
and so he decides to play along.
the halovian hums a sound of agreement. “well said, my dove. but in your opinion, who would you say is the most best-dressed?”
no one dares to look upon the kind of affection sunday gives you. guests and members of the family simply turn their gaze away while the oak family head practically cradles you in his arms. red hearts might as well be shooting out of his eyes!
you blink, a little shocked by his question because did he really have to ask?! the answer is right in front of you!
“w-well,” you stutter, averting your gaze and it is to your misfortune that you miss to see how his soft amber gaze follows yours, as if not to miss a single thought that would reveal itself from the look on your face. “the suit you’ve chosen for this occasion is the most splendid colour.”
a small laugh erupts from his throat. “why thank you, my dove.” he pulls you a little closer and you squeak. “so you think i’m the best dressed?”
you stare at him and grant him an answer with a small nod. but with every passing second he showers you with his attention, the gradual heat that was previously tolerable is now a blazing inferno, dancing across your cheeks.
sunday realises now that he has to calm down. for the sake of his fragile-hearted lover and for the sake of his reputation. any more of this teasing and that really inappropriate sentence queuing at the back of his throat will really leave his lips.
his eyes do sparkle at how your lip quivers. you are just the cutest little thing!
“i am only kidding, dearest one.” he gives you a soft smile, hand rubbing circles on your hip. “though i do appreciate your thoughts.”
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deadsetobsessions · 4 months
Text
Alley Drunk!Danny pt.5
If Danny hadn’t thought about quitting and going to rehab before, he’s definitely going to do it now.
It had been one of those days. Danny had sluggishly managed to usher Jason to school- pulling himself together for their walk to the building, because he wasn’t stupid and this was still Gotham- before going home and relapsing. He knew, going into the first bottle, that he was going to regret it. But he still hadn’t felt the buzz, so he went out to get more.
“Just one. I can stop after, if I want to.”
Spoiler: he could not, actually, stop if he wanted to. Because he didn’t want to, which was the whole problem.
So, one bottle became two, two became three, three became six, and by the time the sun slipped below the horizon, Danny had a pile of bottles scattered around the couch and an intense look of self hatred set upon his brow. He was buzzed, but his stupid ghost biology refused to absorb anymore alcohol.
“Stop brooding, Danny. It’ll hurt your brain.” Jazz said, a hint of worry around her joking insult. “You’re forgetting something important.”
“Wha-?” He mumbled out back at the haze of her-hah- ghost.
The door clicked open. Danny whipped his head to wards the door, snarl on his face and ready to lunge at the intruder, when he came face to face with a scuffed up Jason.
They froze simultaneously, but before Danny could do anything, Jason’s hands tightened on the door knob. The kid’s eyes darted to the floor, where the bottles laid, and back up at Danny’s face. What he found there must not have been good, because he took a step back.
It was fear.
Danny felt his heart drop and his throat go dry. The self hatred doubled in size and weight, but he smacked it down in favor of scrambling for the words- anything- to fix the damage his stupidity and addiction caused.
“Jason.” He said, voice raspy. Had he been screaming again? Good start, good- nope. Never mind, Jason is using the door to shield himself now. Danny glanced outside and-
“Oh. I- I didn’t realize it had gotten so late.” He turned back to Jason, who eyed him warily. “I- I forgot to pick you, didn’t I.”
“…I can walk back by myself.” The hesitant but full of bravado reply made Danny’s ghostly obsession to protect rear its head.
“Still. I’m… I’m sorry, Jason.”
Jason evaluated him, noticeably eyeing his open hands and purposefully lax posture, before stepping inside. He doesn’t close the door behind him- clearly leaving it as an option just in case he needed to bolt. Danny stood up slowly. Jason watched him, and his hands. His smaller hands- Ancients, Danny was scaring a kid- curled up into fists.
“What… how did you get hurt?”
“Got mugged.”
“Are you okay? No- wait,” Danny flooded his liver and blood stream with ectoplasm, and his head instantly cleared. Ah, the agony of being coherent.
Danny subtly shook his head to clear his thoughts. Focus.
“Of course you’re not.” Danny stepped away from the incriminating bottles, slowing to a stop once more as Jason shifted backwards like he was either going to spring at Danny or bolt out the door. “Why don’t we get you patched up? And you can tell me about your day. That I missed, when I forgot to pick you up and that I’m really really sorry for.”
Danny held his breath as Jason considered it. “Are ya drunk?” Jason asked, tilting his shoulder to slide his Wonder Woman backpack down, hand clutching at the opposite strap. A good bludgeoning weapon, even if Danny would rather be electro shocked to death again before he ever hurt Jason.
“No.”
Jason raised an eyebrow, scoffing as he looked down again. Danny recognized the motion, a bolt of heavy nostalgia slamming into his chest as he remembered another red-head doing the same thing when he tried to bullshit his way out of something.
“I was buzzed but… I’m a meta. Alcohol doesn’t exactly affect me. I had to drink a lot to even get buzzed, and it’s gone now.”
“Y’er a meta?” Jason straightened, not completely losing the vigilance, but less tense.
“Yes. I’m completely sober right now, I promise.”
Jason stared at him, inhaled, and relaxed. “You better be.”
“Cross my heart and hope to die.”
“Whatever.”
——
Danny placed the bandages over Jason’s cuts.
“I am so, so sorry I didn’t pick you up.”
Jason shoved at his shoulder, grumbling “I c’n do it myself.”
“I know. You don’t have to, though.”
The kid looked away for a moment before softly admitting, “I was… worried. Cuz, I thought somethin’ happened.”
Danny swallowed the lump in his throat. Jason slipped more into his alley accent the more upset he got these days, having learned some of the local accents at his new school and regularly swapping those out instead of sticking with his alley accent.
“Thank you. For worrying about me. I’m okay.”
“No, you’re not.”
Point. From the mouth of babes came the painful truth, right?
“No. I’m not. But I will be. I’ll go to rehab, Jason. I don’t want to forget picking you up again.”
“Whatever.” Danny hid a smile as Jason ducked his head, looking endearingly like a grumpy duckling. Like, Jazz, when their parents made those blueberry ectoplasm pancakes she liked but thought they’d forgotten that she liked.
“And thank you, Jason, for coming back alive. I- I should have been there, but I’m so glad that you’re okay.”
“I want waffles and ice cream for dinner.”
“Yeah, we can do that.”
“Wow, you musta felt real bad if you’re letting me eat that for dinner.”
Danny grinned down at the head of black hair (with their red roots once more poking out) and ruffled Jason’s head. “I let you eat like five chili dogs in one go. This should not be surprising. But I’ll let you skip the veggies today too.”
“… No, I want the veggies too.”
Danny let out a bark of bright laughter.
Yeah, there’s no way he’s ever risking Jason looking at him like that again. The kid looked like he thought Danny would come swinging at him, despite their previous meetings where he had, perhaps and with plausible deniability, swung for Jason, but never against him.
That night, after he tucked Jason into bed, Danny signed up for rehab. As a matter of fact, Jazz’s words coming into mind, Danny also signed up for therapy. For him and Jason. Yeah.
——
Off camera, they talked about why Jason react to bottles and hands the way he does, and why he’s so scared whenever Danny slips back into his addiction. I’m just rlly too tired to write it.
——
Danny, who thought his addiction wasn’t that serious and that he could stop anytime because he stopped for Jason: I’m cured!
Also Danny: drinks as soon as Jason goes to school
Danny was one hundred percent using Jason as a crutch and when he felt like Jason was safe, he slipped back to his habits. The only reason Danny’s not dead- well, deader than he normally would be- is because ghost biology makes it so that alcohol is cycled through quicker. Like the Flash, but less fast? Anyways, he had enough to make him lose track of time and forget important things (Jason) and that’s what addiction can do to you, amongst other things.
Jason might seem calm but that’s actually a combo of his go to trauma response (fight) and his experience of 1) being on the streets and 2) living with a previous drunkard coming into play. Also, you might be like what kind of kid wants to eat veggies? And to that I answer: KIDS THAT NEVER HAD ENOUGH TO EAT. I would have killed for a veggie stir fry with a lot of chicken back as a kid lol
On a lighter note, the whole time they’re having this interaction, I kind of imagined it as two chickens just kind of dancing around each other.
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sanguineterrain · 3 months
Note
I am FERAL over your knight Jason thought. FERAL!!! Okay check this out: so Jason's ignoring reader because he feels guilty right? Maybe he tried to give them back but the king wouldn't allow it. But maybe the reader misunderstands and thinks they're not doing their "duties" so they make dinner and breakfast and wash his clothes and basically act like a perfect spouse. How would Jason react? 👀
Dear god... I feel another series coming on...
Idkidk, their dynamic is just really interesting to me! it's probably gonna be a bit of a slow burn here. Feel free to send more thoughts about them. I am rotating these two like a rotisserie chicken in my brain.
knight!jason todd x gn!reader. ambiguous time period but just assume it's olden times *gestures vaguely*. tw arranged marriage/forced relationship but it's complicated! jason is full of angst and self-loathing but he's a sweetie as per usual. original post for context.
****
The soldier—Jason—has said four words since you've arrived.
The first was "here," which he said whilst handing you a mug of milk. He didn't look at you as he said it, and that morning, he left for a five-day long station. You only know that because he said, after handing you the milk, "I've been stationed."
You realized it was five days when you heard his horse galloping towards the house... five days later.
You haven't initiated conversation because though you're a commoner, and no one ever had much hope for you to become anything but an old spinster, you know not to challenge knights.
But this is fucking ridiculous.
"Do you like veal?" you ask on your fourteenth day here.
Jason is about to leave, his boots half laced. He freezes at your question and looks up.
You stand tall, chin up. This is a normal question. A question a wife would ask her husband, except you're not a wife, and you're pretty sure this soldier isn't a husband either.
"I like veal," he says carefully, slowly. "Would you like me to fetch some from the market?"
Now, this is where it gets tricky. When the king summoned you, he made it clear that you were expected to care for Jason under his rules. You don't know how to navigate this world. You know what couples in your village do, but you don't know what's expected of you here.
"Actually, I..." Jason looks at you. His eyes are very green. He has a surprisingly sweet face under his helmet. "Actually, I was wondering if I could go. On my own."
"Oh."
You brace yourself for arguing or yelling. True, he hasn't raised his voice once, but he also hasn't said much at all. It's like living with a ghost.
"Yes, of course. Of course you can go." He fishes out a pouch of coins and gives them to you. You take it slowly, waiting for him to realize his mistake. He doesn't.
"Thank you," you say.
He nods and watches you walk.
"Wait."
You stop. Here it comes.
"There's a cargo ship in port today. The guards rotate at noon."
He leaves before you can form a thought. You hold the coins, watching blankly as the door shuts behind him. His horse whinnies, and then he's gone.
The market isn't far from the cottage. It's fantastic to be outside again. No one's noticed your absence, clearly, but that's alright. You've never expected more.
You buy a good cut of veal and potatoes and carrots and apples. Jason gave you more money than any cut of meat would cost, so surely he assumed you would buy other food. Why else would he give you so much?
A ship's horn drones in the distance. You're feeling some oranges when you remember his words. A cargo ship.
The sun is almost at its highest point.
"Oi! Either buy 'em or stop feelin' 'em!" the seller snaps.
You roll your eyes and move on from the orange stand. You can see the horizon of where the sky meets the sea from here. Any moment, the guards will change, and the ship will be...
You stop. Was Jason hinting at your escape?
No, he couldn't have been! That's preposterous. Why would he want you gone? The king took you for a reason.
And where would you go anyway? Once you leave, you'd be a criminal forever. You couldn't make a home on your own. And who knows what could happen in between? Pirates, enemy soldiers, anybody could snatch you up.
This must've been a test. A test to see if you would run. That's why he agreed to you going so easily.
No, your escape can't be planned now. Not when you're so obviously uncomfortable, and Jason knows it.
You ignore the ship and go home with your purchases. You spend the rest of the afternoon preparing veal stew. You warm leftover bread over the fire and set a pot of butter on the table.
Jason comes in louder than he has before, humming quietly. You perk up at the sound, happy for the lack of silence.
You set a bowl of stew at his chair and wait by the fire. As soon as he enters the kitchen, the humming stops.
"Welcome home," you say, wringing your hands. "I made supper."
Jason glances at the table, then back at you.
"You came back," he says.
"Why wouldn't I?" you ask, face neutral as you cut the bread into chunks.
"That—did the ship come?"
"Yes."
Jason sits. His face is dirty from training.
"I bought more than veal," you say, and hand him the pouch. "I hope that's alright. We—there were no more potatoes."
He takes the pouch, rubbing the string tied around the top. "You went to the marketplace... and came back."
It's not a question, but it sounds like there might be one behind it.
"Certainly," you say. "I'm loyal to you, Jason. I serve you."
He looks up, blinking rapidly. Then he looks back at his stew.
Oh, right. He's waiting for you to ask permission to sit.
"May I join you?" you ask.
Jason flinches. "You don't... you don't have to ask. I would never stop you from eating."
The words hang in the air. It's like neither one of you can speak right.
You watch him, and he watches you as you serve yourself and sit on the opposite side of the table. Jason takes the first bite, and you eat right after.
"Is the supper satisfactory? Have I done well?" you ask.
Jason stops chewing and sets his spoon down. You're struck by his shift in demeanor. You worry for a moment you've screwed up something as dim-wittingly simple as stew.
His eyes are sad as they fall on you. It's akin to grief, the pain he wears, but you don't know why he's grieving. You silently offer him more bread, pushing it toward him. He takes it.
"Yes," he says quietly and eats another spoonful. "You did. Thank you for supper."
Jason cleans his bowl three times. You have no stew leftover, which pleases you.
But as soon as Jason finishes eating, he gets up, rinses his bowl, and wordlessly leaves.
You don't see him for the rest of the night.
Somehow, you feel lonelier than when you weren't speaking.
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alyrasturnz · 1 month
Note
can u write something about chris arguing with you and saying really hurtful things and later then feeling bad after 😭😭
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I'M SO SORRY
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❐ summary » chris utters deeply wounding words during a heated argument, words that linger in the air like a dark cloud, casting a shadow over their relationship. as the echoes of his harsh declarations resonate, both chris and y/n are left grappling with the profound emotional damage inflicted. the rawness of the moment envelops them, each struggling to process the pain and regret that now defines the space between them.
❐ pairings » toxic!chris x fem!reader
❐ warnings » argument (resolved)
❐ a/n && w/c » a chris fic coming from me is rare  •  1.83k
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the room was thick with tension as you and chris grappled with the day's mounting frustrations. after yet another failed take, chris's patience finally snapped. he slammed a stack of papers onto the table, the sound reverberating through the room, his frustration unmistakable.
"what is wrong with you today?" chris's voice was edged with palpable irritation. "you keep messing up everything. can't you do anything right?"
your eyes widened, a flash of hurt crossing your face. you had been striving to keep everything on track, but the mounting stress was wearing you thin. "i'm doing my best. it's not like i'm trying to make mistakes."
chris's voice grew sharper, frustration seeping into every word. "your best? really? because it doesn't look like you're putting in any effort at all. maybe if you actually cared about this project, we wouldn't be in this mess."
you set down the cleaning supplies, trying to steady your trembling hands. "i care about this project. i'm just trying to keep up with everything that's going on. if you'd just communicate better, maybe things wouldn't be so chaotic."
chris’s laugh was bitter, a harsh edge cutting through his tone. “oh, so now it’s my fault? you’re the one who can’t keep up. do you even realize how much extra work you’re creating for everyone else? it’s like you’re deliberately trying to screw things up.”
tears started to well up in your eyes as you took a step back, your hands clutching the edges of the table. "i'm not trying to cause problems. i'm just trying to help, and i'm getting really tired of being treated like i'm a burden."
chris’s face darkened, his anger simmering over like a storm on the horizon. “a burden? that’s all you are right now. you think you’re contributing, but all you’re doing is slowing us down. maybe if you took a moment to think about how your actions affect others, you’d realize just how much of a mess you’re making.”
your tears began to fall freely, but you fought to keep your voice steady. “you don’t have to be so cruel. i’m already stressed out, and you’re just making it worse. i thought we were supposed to be a team.”
chris’s eyes narrowed, his anger unchecked, like a wildfire consuming everything in its path. he took a step forward, his fists clenching at his sides, the muscles in his jaw tightening as he struggled to contain his fury. “a team? this isn’t a team. it’s a joke. you’re just dragging everyone down with your incompetence. if you can’t handle it, maybe you should just step aside and let someone who actually knows what they’re doing take over.”
your shoulders slumped, the weight of his words pressing down on you like an unbearable burden. your voice broke, trembling with the raw emotion you could no longer contain. “i’m trying my best. i didn’t ask for things to go wrong, and i didn’t expect to be treated like this. maybe if you were more supportive, things wouldn’t be so bad.”
chris’s face twisted into a scowl, his patience completely exhausted, like a thread worn thin. “supportive? i don’t have time to babysit you. you’re a grown adult; you should be able to handle basic tasks without screwing everything up. maybe you should just leave if you can’t handle a little criticism.”
your heart ached with the sting of his harshness, each word like a dagger piercing your resolve. “i don’t deserve this. i’ve been working hard, and all i get is contempt and harsh words. if you can’t see how hard i’m trying, then maybe you’re the one with the problem.”
chris’s anger flared one last time, his voice cold and final, like a winter's chill settling over the room. “you know what? i’m done. i can’t deal with this right now. figure it out on your own. i’m leaving.”
without another word, chris stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind him with a force that shook the walls. the silence that followed was heavy and suffocating, like a thick fog settling over everything. you stood alone in the room, your heart aching with the sting of his words and the weight of the unresolved conflict, feeling as though the very air had turned to lead.
as you quietly sobbed, the harshness of the argument hung in the air like a storm cloud that refused to dissipate. you felt utterly isolated, grappling with the emotional fallout of a confrontation that had left you feeling both hurt and abandoned, as if the very essence of your being had been stripped away, leaving you raw and exposed.
»--•--«
the clock struck three in the morning, and the house was silent except for the soft hum of the refrigerator and the occasional creak of settling wood. you lay curled up on the couch, the cushions barely cushioning the weight of your emotional exhaustion. 
the argument with chris had left you feeling hollow, and you had found yourself unable to sleep, opting instead to seek solace in the familiarity of the living room, where even the shadows seemed to understand your sorrow.
the door to the room creaked open slowly, and chris, his eyes bloodshot and swollen from lack of sleep and tears, stepped inside. he looked disheveled and hollow, as if the weight of the night’s argument had physically drained him. the moonlight filtered through the window, casting an ethereal glow that illuminated his troubled face.
he hesitated for a moment at the threshold, then took a shuffling step forward, as if the weight of his emotions were too heavy for his feet to bear. his breath came in uneven gasps, and the tear streaks on his cheeks glistened like fragile rivers of sorrow in the dim light.
the sight of him, broken and vulnerable, was almost more painful than the argument itself. you could see the raw evidence of his tears, each glimmer a testament to his remorse, which hung thick in the air, palpable even from across the room.
"y/n," he whispered, his voice cracking like fragile glass. he swallowed hard, a visible effort to compose himself, yet the depth of his regret seeped through every word. "can we talk?" his plea hung in the air, heavy with unspoken apologies and the weight of his vulnerability.
you didn't move, unsure of what to say or how to respond. your heart still ached from the harsh words he had thrown at you earlier, each one leaving a lingering sting. chris took a few more hesitant steps towards you, the weight of his guilt evident in every movement, as if each step was a silent apology. his eyes, filled with remorse, sought yours, hoping for a chance at redemption.
"I—I know it’s late," chris continued, his voice trembling like a fragile leaf in the wind. "i just... i couldn't stop thinking about what i said. i'm so sorry. i never should have spoken to you like that." his words, laden with regret, hung in the air, a poignant echo of his inner turmoil and the depth of his remorse.
you slowly turned your head, meeting his gaze. his eyes were filled with genuine remorse, tears spilling over his lower lashes like a sorrowful stream. he wiped at his face, but more tears quickly took their place, relentless in their descent. the sight of his vulnerability was both heartbreaking and confusing, a raw display of emotion that left you grappling with your own feelings.
"i was out of line," chris said, his voice breaking further, each word a jagged shard of his regret. "everything i said was hurtful and untrue. i didn't mean any of it, i swear. i just... i let my frustration get the best of me, and i took it out on you. that's not fair. it's not right." his confession hung in the air, a poignant testament to his inner turmoil and the weight of his guilt.
he stopped a few feet from the couch, his posture slumped and defeated, a silent testament to his remorse. "i've been thinking about how much i hurt you, and it's eating me up inside. i don't expect you to forgive me right away, but i want you to know how deeply sorry i am. i never want to make you feel like that again." his words, laden with sorrow, wove a tapestry of regret and a desperate yearning for redemption.
your silence was heavy, the air thick with the weight of his apology. chris's shoulders shook slightly as he tried to steady his breathing, his eyes locked onto yours with an earnest, almost pleading look. his vulnerability was palpable, a raw and unfiltered display of the turmoil within, leaving you to navigate the complex web of emotions that his words had woven.
"i know i've done a lot of damage," chris continued, his voice barely above a whisper, each word trembling with the weight of his remorse. "and i don't know how to make it right, but i want to try. i need to. please, y/n, just... tell me what i can do to make this up to you." his plea hung in the air, a fragile thread of hope amidst the ruins of his actions.
you studied him for a long moment, the pain still fresh but mingling with the realization of his genuine regret. his raw, tearful expression spoke volumes, and you could see how deeply he was affected by the argument.
slowly, you sat up, your heart softening despite the hurt. the silence between you was thick with unspoken words, a delicate dance of emotions that left you both teetering on the edge of reconciliation.
chris took a tentative step closer, his eyes never leaving yours. he reached out a hand, his gesture both hesitant and hopeful, as if afraid that any movement could shatter the fragile moment.
his fingers trembled slightly, a silent testament to the depth of his vulnerability and the earnestness of his desire to bridge the chasm that had formed between you.
"i'm so sorry," he repeated, his voice choked with emotion, each syllable a raw plea for forgiveness. "please, just give me a chance to fix this. i love you, and i never want to hurt you again." his words hung in the air, laden with the weight of his remorse and the desperate hope for redemption, a poignant symphony of regret and longing.
you took a deep breath, the pain and anger of the argument still lingering but softened by the sight of chris’s heartfelt apology. as you finally reached out to him, the first step towards healing began. 
the two of you sat together on the couch in the quiet of the early morning, the silence now filled with the weight of shared remorse and the fragile hope for forgiveness. the dawn's light began to filter through the windows, casting a gentle glow on the room, as if nature itself was bearing witness to the tentative mending of your hearts.
taglist —  @imwetforyourmom @meatballzerz69 @pinkishpearls @bandanamatt @thedangerousalleyway @muchloveforhacker @frozenpeanutbutterr @jetaimevous @everleiqh @conspiracy-ash @ifwdominicfike @blahbel668 @slutforsturnioloss @realuvrrr @sturnobsessedwh0re @cerismo @zainabthescientist @sarosfilms 
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alpydk · 4 months
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I've had a brainworm (tadpole?) that won't leave my head.
How would Gale's partner (Tav or Origin) react to him unintentionally saying Mystra's name during sex?
I don't think he would say it as his ex, but rather an exclamation ("Oh Gods", "By Mystra", etc).
I know I wouldn't be pleased. 😵‍💫
"By Mystra"
Anon, you are a miracle worked because I loved writing this. Like this is literally smut that I did not cringe my way through or go ugh why... Like I actually sent a quote to someone whilst writing this in a mini celebration of enjoyment. Really so much fun, so thank you. - I will say though it's probably not what you wanted at all. Oops. (Or maybe it is, I'm not a psychic.)
Word count : 1570 - M/E - It's Smut, there's nothing but smut here. I couldn't even angst this fucker up. - Gale x Tav (F)
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The evening had gone along as it normally would. Gale and Tav entertained his mother with the local gossip of Waterdeep, fresh tea leaves releasing their aroma into the study, the odd whisper shared between the happily married couple. The sun was now making its leisurely stroll towards the horizon and Tav had now moved onto round two of the game she affectionately liked to call Nimble fingers, ill intent. The first round would be innocent enough, the odd remark about how he looked nice when sat in certain positions or a passing comment about times they had spent alone given with a sultry look. “Oh yes, I remember that tavern, Morena. The detail on the oak bed posts were exquisite. Real craftsmanship.” Round two was based more on the physical aspects of distraction and competition: the lick of a teaspoon after eating dessert, the run of her hand along his thigh under the dinner table, the whisper in his ear of how she seemed to have forgotten her underwear. “Oh, it was nothing Morena, a quick reminder about a certain someone’s birthday.”
These nights were still as enjoyable as they were the first time around a campfire. Hands slipped under robes, concentration lapsing into yearning, travelling companions none the wiser of the exploits taking place. She would make him forget all logic, all reason, all devotion he ever had to his goddess.
He couldn’t get rid of his mother quick enough as he watched Tav lean over the coffee table to collect up the cutlery, her lilac shirt hanging a little lower than suitable and knowingly it was in full view of him. He saw the way her breasts hung against the cloth, the line of her cleavage drawing his gaze without mercy. After so much teasing, he didn’t just want her; he needed her desperately, as if he had been trapped underwater and she was his only source of air to breathe.
As the entrance door of the tower closed, signalling Morena’s exit, Gale was quick to press Tav to the wall of the stairwell; her wrists bound under his firm hand, the other travelling under the fabric of her shirt to place its mark on the previously taunting flesh. His lips found hers with an intensity he refused to hold back on, more eager than his well-mannered nature with his mother had let on. They navigated the stairs up to the tower quickly, a trail of cotton and leather left in their wake.
Heated kisses were placed over naked bodies, his flushed lips along her neck, her wanting hands travelling from his abdomen to his hips. The royal blue sheets of the bed were always the goal, but rarely did they make it there, instead ending up on the daybed or, more often, the scarlet floral rug that lay at the foot of the bed. From there, he would see her lying and waiting, her body moistened and ready for him, her eyes beckoning him with a love he would give himself to again and again. For a thousand nights, he would worship her in so many ways: some nights slowly with a tender caress of her inner thigh, others more playful, a nibble of her shoulder, and the teasing of his fingertips. Within the four walls of the bedroom, he was the one in control; he was the god to a single follower.
He nudged her leg aside with his own, climbing towards her, his urges to take her driving him forward with little thought of anything else. It was as he took her nipple in his mouth, the flick of his tongue creating the unwilling whimper emerge from her, that he felt her hand push him ever so slightly. This was new, a sign of dominance from one who normally welcomed his practiced tongue so openly.
He accepted the reaction, Tav’s hands coming up to his shoulders, rolling him to his back with a tentative push. He lay beneath her, her legs straddled over his hips, her breasts hanging just above his chest. His heart beat with an intensity he only felt as she teased, the devious look in her eyes telling him this wouldn’t be as easy as an impromptu lanceboard match. She held herself above him, the heat of her cunt drawing him in. He craved her touch, yearned to be inside her and have her entirely and yet she watched him, waited for his control to falter as it always did around her.
“Please...” He whispered underneath her. He would not beg, nor would he lower himself to that level of pleading he'd done so long ago, but he would ask if that is what she wanted of him. He would do anything for her if it meant he could show his love for her.
She sunk down onto him, her pace relaxed, her hands sliding their way up his chest. He felt the slow roll of her hips, his own body instinctively retorting with an impatient jolt. She stopped and sat up above him, a disappointed sigh that told him he’d done something wrong.
“My apologies... I... I became too eager-“
She rose and took him again in one quick thrust, a command that she was in charge. Without warning, he let out a deep growl, his self-control slowly unravelling with the growing intensity of her movements. He could feel the way her hand held down his shoulder, the fingernails of the other embedding themselves in the skin of his abdomen. What were once relaxed whines were slowly becoming the sputtered moans of his name through gritted teeth. She was fighting this as much as he was and he could feel the way her body was arching, trying to hold back on a climax that threatened to break through at any moment.
He closed his eyes, the symphony of ecstasy ringing in his ears, his body still accepting her pace despite how much he wished to just grab her and fuck her. He neared his precipice, one he had fallen from so many times with Tav, one he would happily fall from a thousand times more and he parted his lips, the sensation too much to contain. “By Mystra...”
Tav’s movements stopped suddenly, an abrupt silence that took him a moment to register before realising what had happened. She looked down at him with a combination of confusion and offense. “Did you just...?”
He felt the icy chill in the pit of his stomach, his practised tongue letting him down the moment he wasn’t the one in control of the situation. He hadn’t meant it as anything but an exclamation of pleasure, but he knew it was not the most welcome name after all that happened, especially when said in the bedroom. “Tav, I did not mean-“
She broke him off with another quick roll of her hips, a smirk curling upon her reddened lips. “Say it again.”
Gale looked at her with confusion. “Say what exactly?”
Tav bucked against him, an irritable look in her eyes. “Her name. Say it again.”
He was unsure what she meant, the rules of their game changing with each state of play. Lanceboard had been left in the dusty halls of the library; now they played a completely different game of strategy, one where he was but a novice. “Mystra...” he spoke with an uncertainty in his tone.
This time Tav’s movements were gentler, slower, and more deliberate. His head leaned back onto the rug, the red fibres weaving with his brown locks.
“Again,” she commanded.
He obeyed without doubt. “Mystra...”
She smiled, her hands moving from his shoulder down to his hips, her back arching, and pelvis tilting ever so slightly, allowing him to feel her in full. With each jolt he felt his muscles begin to tremble, the goddess’ name gasped through worshipping lips. And yet he prayed not to her but to the goddess that wrapped her thighs around him, the one whose sweat beaded with his own, the one that called his name as her hands found his.
She tightened around him, all control gone, nothing else mattering but the fought off release that now consumed her senses. She let out one guttural cry, only interrupted by the deep thrusts as Gale chased his own orgasm. What had been the Lady of Magic’s name had now become the Hero of Baldur’s Gate. Tav sputtered out as wave upon wave of pleasure erupted forth from him, as muscles grew taut and his body buried itself into as far as it possibly could.
She fell limp around him, his arm wrapping around her in a loving embrace as he pulled her onto the floor with him. Their skin glistened with sweat, the air now humid, the only sound being their panted breathing as they regained their composure. The sensation of a light charge brushing against his skin brought him to smile, a devilish knowing of exactly what Tav had done with her control over him. The goddess’ name, spoken in worship, in devotion, would of course have drawn her attention, if only for a moment. He placed a soft kiss on Tav’s forehead, tonight’s game most assuredly her victory.
“With you, I forget my goddess...” She titled her head up to look at him, an almost innocent gaze in her eyes. “I just wanted to make sure that was still the case.”
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aquaquadrant · 4 months
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grbbrgrr. scurries toward you. I offer thee pathbubs fluff, fresh from my mind fortress.
Patho. falling asleep with dbubs’s clock to his ear.
gives you a cupcake skitters away
(offering received, considered, and accepted. however, i have substituted your fluff for angst. i hope this is satisfactory.)
~*~
"watch this!" dbubs shouts, before leaping off the cliff into the water below.
<player>dat -7063fdce-39ac-4a12-d836-a990c45b2bb0
patho leans back just enough to avoid being splashed. the water in this jungle lagoon is clear and blue, brighter than most bodies of water he comes across. tall, thick trees surround them on all sides, creating a natural barrier from the mobs of the jungle. it’s a beautiful place, and one of his favorites to visit when he’s here.
155 fps t: inf fancy-clouds b: 15x15 3 tx 3 rx c: 695/41672 (s) d: 16, pc: 000, pu: 00, ab: 42 e: 17/109, b: 0, sd: 9 p: 28 t: 109 error fc:0 xyz: -12,683.952 / 39.11563 / 253,589.263 block: -12,683 39 253,589 chunk: -791 15 7,849 facing: south (towards positive z)(1.5/5) client light: 6 (0 sky, 6 block) biome: error:crimson jungle local difficulty: 6.75//0.00 (day error404 not found) sounds: 16/247 + 0/8
dbubs surfaces with a gasp, his wet bangs plastered to his forehead. “did you see that?” he crows. “that was- i must’ve done a- a complete 360 spin about five- no, ten times! world record, first try!”
“oh, yeah,” patho agrees with a smile he doesn’t feel. “yeah, that was very impressive.”
they’re almost out of time.
patho has known this since he woke to find a little weeping vine attempting to burrow into his arm, right at the seam where flesh meets metal. this is an event that only happens when he’s overstayed his welcome, and the jungle can no longer tolerate his presence without trying to claim him. that vine was easily removed, putting off the inevitable for a few more days. but he can’t ignore the sudden restlessness that overtakes him now, a buzzing in his very core that fills his mind with static and his limbs- organic and mechanical alike- with the powerful urge to move.
it’s hard to explain, his need to wander. it’s like every moment he’s not traveling, he can almost feel the infinite borders of hels expanding, spreading into new horizons, and the thought of staying put is unbearable. it doesn’t matter if he actually goes beyond the loaded chunks or not- a feat that’d take years, to be sure. just getting on the move again is enough to quiet the itch.
(it didn’t use to be this way. it didn’t start until after he built his communicator into his new arm, fusing himself with it- but he’ll never admit this, never confront the possibility that it might’ve been a mistake. it’s easier just to leave.)
besides, he still enjoys the various business he gets up to with the other denizens of hels. his services as a redstoner and a data analyst are in high demand, and he has a reputation to uphold. he can’t throw all that away to stay here. that just wouldn’t make sense. it wouldn’t be logical.
patho reaches for the clock at his hip. it was the first gift dbubs gave him. early into patho’s first stay, dbubs decided he needed a clock of his own, so he’d always know when it was time for them to sleep. based on its position, nightfall is only a couple hours away.
“well, c’mon!” dbubs pesters him, his haughty voice echoing off the smooth walls of the cliffside. “what’re you- what, are ya scared of a lil water? huh? just- you just try and beat my record, you- i bet you can’t!”
“alright, alright,” patho chuckles, shrugging his jacket off. “you asked for it…”
won’t be long, now.
~*~
that night, patho leaves his eye on.
dbubs, curled beside him, notices this immediately, and deep down, he knows what it means. it took a while- how long, he isn’t sure- for patho to grow comfortable enough to turn his cybernetic eye off while they slept. but ever since then, he does it every night… up until the last night. every last night, like clockwork.
already, dbubs can feel the familiar weight of sleep trying to take him. caught in the jungle’s day-night cycle, he has little choice in the matter; he sleeps every night without fail. but he fights it anyway, biting back a yawn.
“tomorrow,” dbubs starts quietly, “uh, do you wanna- i- i had this idea for a new build, a perfect build, of course, and i’m gonna need a- a super smelter, for- uh, for all the terracotta-“
“dbubs.” that solitary red eye gazes out from the dark. “you know i’m not made for staying.”
dbubs shies away from the words like an insect from sudden light. “and- and so i was thinking,” he continues, as if patho hadn’t spoken, “we could do a uh, you know, maybe a bamboo farm? for the- for the fuel? i- my perfect redstone prowess could make this easy- easily, of course, but um… i uh- euugh, you- you know they always say, sure enough, that two brains- uh, two geniuses, genii, are better’n one.”
“yeah?” patho breathes a soft, empty laugh. “is that what they say?”
“and- well, yes! yes, of course!” darkness creeps in from the edges of dbubs’s vision; he clings tighter to patho. “and… and uh… n’you can learn all ‘bout my new… new dbubs redstone clock… pat- patented design, a‘course…”
“of course.” patho’s lips brush across his forehead. “better get some rest, then.”
dbubs struggles to keep his eyes open, but it’s as if his lashes are lined with iron. he presses his face in the crook of patho’s neck, breathing him in, that redstone-and-gunpowder scent; bitter and metallic.
“don’t,” he murmurs, consciousness escaping him quickly. “please…?”
“night, dbubs.”
the jungle sleeps.
~*~
far from the jungle, patho lays down in a shallow cave carved from netherrack.
168 fps t: inf fancy-clouds b: 15x15 3 tx 3 rx c: 695/41672 (s) d: 16, pc: 000, pu: 00, ab: 42 e: 15/109, b: 0, sd: 9 p: 27 t: 109 error fc:0 xyz: -11, 987.629 / 30.91778 / 252,896.204 block: -11,987 30 252,896 chunk: -780 15 7,835 facing: east (towards positive x)(1.5/5) client light: 2 (0 sky, 2 block) biome: error:nether waste local difficulty: 6.75//0.00 (day error404 not found) sounds: 5/247 + 0/8
he’s put enough distance between himself and the jungle that he’s confident he can sleep for a few hours before setting off again. the surrounding biome is one he’s well familiar with; barren and empty. with a wall put up to shelter him from mobs, he’s finally safe enough to turn his eye off.
that won’t be the case anymore, once he gets closer to the more populated chunks. the risk of being caught with one eye nonfunctional is too high. it’s just something he has to deal with.
(of course, he could’ve built a cybernetic replacement that simply functioned like the eye he lost, but he thought himself clever and built in a data processor to provide him with valuable information, giving him an advantage over anyone else in his field. so this is the price he pays for it.)
he reaches for his clock. there’s only a couple hours left before the sun will rise, unseen beyond the bedrock ceiling, and dbubs will wake to an empty bed.
but for now, patho tucks the clock to his ear and closes his eyes, letting the steadfast ticking finally lull him to sleep.
~*~
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0nlythrowharrybeaux · 11 months
Text
With Discretion - Part 3 ^**
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Sorry for the delay friends! I had a night lol But here is part 3! I'm panning on doing a little holiday check-in for this pair so it's supposed to end a little abruptly. More to come over the christmas/ny season!
Read the other parts here
Warnings: infidelity, mentions of insecurities, sexism, divorce. Oral (m receiving), face fuck, sex (unprotected p in v)
WC: 17.5K
It was nearly 6:30am when you were awakened by some knocks on the door. You groaned and yawned before trudging out of the comfort of the large king bed that you had melted into for the night. When you opened it up, eyes slightly squinting a bit through the blurriness of your vision you saw Harry holding two large mugs and wearing an amused smile on his face. 
“God, I knew you woke up pretty.” He said softly and you sniggered as you opened the door to let him in.
“Oh, sure thing.” you replied groggily with a giggle as he stepped inside.
“Good morning, by the way. I ummm, just wanted to come by and see the sunrise with you. I can leave if you’re still in need of some more sleep, but I was trying to hint at it yesterday when I mentioned it and-”
“I did get the hint. You beat my alarm by 3 minutes actually!” You smiled, “I just wasn’t sure if ummm…you’d be joining me or not, but I’m glad you’re here.” You assured him. “M’just gonna brush my teeth and ummm, grab a sweater or something.”
“Yeah, it’s a bit cold out.” He said and then just made his way outside to the balcony and while you went into the bathroom to freshen up a bit. As soon as you were more awake and cozy you headed out to join him on the balcony. “I tried the new milk steamer they have in the kitchen and made cappuccinos, I think.” He said as he handed you one of the mugs and you smiled, “Didn’t sweeten it or anything though.” He warned as you looked down into it.
“S’alright. Good coffee doesn’t need sweeteners.” You said with a smile.
“Well I hope it’s good then.” He joked and you both laughed softly before turning to the horizon that was turning a lighter shade of blue now, a very light hint of orange starting to emerge from the darkness. “Did you sleep well?” 
“Yes, thank you. I need that bed though, it’s phenomenal.” You hummed and he smiled.
“It really is. I’m glad you were comfortable.”
“And what about you?” You asked him.
“Good too. Had a dream…a nightmare actually about some thief breaking into my home and stealing all my tiramisu!” You immediately burst into laughter, “Don’t know what could’ve brought that on but… that’s what I dreamt of.” he said with a grin.
“Yeah, I wonder…” you joked with a playful roll of your eyes and a gentle nudge of your elbow into his side. You let your laughter subside and the sound of the waves on the shore took over, bringing a peaceful silence over you for a few minutes. The sky was clearing up more and more by the minute, showing off its splendor without any hesitation.
“Are you nervous about going home?” Harry asked you and you set your cappuccino down on the thick rail of the balcony.
“A little bit.” You admitted, “Wish I could just fast forward to the end of it all.” You sighed and he extended his left arm over your shoulders and pulled you into his side.
“I’m sorry.”
“Thanks.” You sighed and looked at the sun starting to peek up over the horizon, “You were right, this is gorgeous.” You hummed.
“Yeah, it’s really something.” He smiled as he leaned his head against yours. “You know, I could give Cal a raise so he has to pay you more in alimony.” He mused and your body started shaking with laughter before it inevitably squawked out of you. Your head was thrown back as he laughed along with you, really happy that this is how you reacted to his little joke.
“Ah, that’s funny…” you hummed when your laughter died down. 
“I’m like 25% serious.” He added and you shook your head.
“You’re silly.” You smiled before sipping at your cappuccino.
“Just a little bit.” He grinned. “What’s the first thing you’re gonna do after you settle the divorce?” He asked and you hummed pensively.
“Take my Italian vacation…” you hummed, “I’ve been begging Cal to take me on a romantic getaway to Italy for years! Like a month-long thing though. I want to get to know the entire country.” You smiled. “But I think I can take myself on a romantic getaway.” You said and he hummed.
“That sounds like a wonderful time. Italy is probably my favorite country.” He hummed. “Does your entire trip have to be…by yourself? Or can you afford a little extra baggage for a few days?” He asked and you twirled around and smiled up at him.
“A few days, huh?” You asked and he nodded with a coy smile, “Mmm…perhaps that’s arlright.” You smiled.
“Ok… and well for the rest of your trip, I know a lot of really excellent spots, have a lot of friends in Italy. Chefs, architects, artists…could fix you up with them when you’re in their region? See the best parts of each place.” He offered.
“Ummm, yeah! That sounds phenomenal. It’ll take me a bit to plan, but I’m definitely interested in that.” You assured him.
“Alright. When you have a date let me know.” He said and you nodded. You just stayed looking at each other and your heart fluttered when his dimple started carving deeper into his cheek.
“What?” You asked and he shrugged.
“Just…excited for you, I guess.  Like, you’re going to be just fine. I really love that for you.” He said and you felt your cheeks warming with a blush. 
“Thank you, I think I will be fine too.” You agreed.
“OK, the good part is starting!” He said and twirled you back around and you both set down your mugs. You smiled at the now purple and orange ranges of colors that were painted across the sky as the blazing sun started showing more of its brilliant face. Your smile widened with each passing second as more of it started to emerge seemingly from nowhere at all. It was breathtaking to say the least. 
You couldn’t help but feel that this was the perfect thing to witness as the sun rose on a new journey in your own life. It was kind of poetic. It made you smile as you leaned a bit more weight back on Harry and he held you a bit closer. The moment was solemn as you both kept the quiet between you and just let yourselves feel the awe of the moment.
Harry was in his head as much as you were though. He was thinking about where things would go with you from here. He supposed you’d want some time to just reacquaint yourself with yourself. He figured that you would probably move out, but would you stay in New York or head off somewhere else? Would you go back to work and give up your business? Would you even be interested in a romantic anything with anyone for a while? Because he wanted that with you…or to at least try. He had huge crush on you and the more time he spent with you the bigger it got. Obviously, he didn’t know nearly enough about you, but he was interested in getting to know you deeply. He was quite enamored with you just from what he’d already seen and experienced for himself. 
“What’s your favorite color?” You suddenly asked and he smiled.
“Green.”
“Like your eyes?” You asked and he chuckled.
“No. Like…a jade color.”
“So basically your eye color.” You sniggered, teasing him.
“Yeah, I guess so then.” He sighed in defeat, “Just makes me feel calm. And you?” 
“Right now…mmm, like an orange color. Like…oh, well just like that I guess.” You said as you pointed to the little sliver of sky right above the rising sun. “It just makes me feel warm and fuzzy…I don’t know.” You said.
“Yeah, I can see why.”
“It just looks so…happy.” You shrugged with a smile, “I can’t wait to just…feel it for myself again, you know? Like from the inside.”
“You will.” He assured, “I promise you will.” He said with certainty and you turned around, your eyes met his. You reached for his face and he wrapped his arms around your waist and you kissed him deeply. You melted against his warmth, loving the feeling of your lips meeting together passionately. You hadn’t felt this riled up in years. You could jump out of a plane with how invincible you currently felt. As you pulled apart and your eyes blinked open they met with his. Harry’s lips twitched up in a grin and you just nuzzled down into his neck timidly.
“I really like you.” You confessed and he just squeezed you a bit tighter.
“I really like you too.” He hummed with a smile as he stared at the sunrise. 
After that lovely moment between the two of you, you went your separate ways and it was back down to reality. You had just been watching TV, waiting for Caleb to wake up when your phone rang and you saw it was a call from him.
“Hello?”
“Did you leave?” He asked tiredly.
“No. M’upstairs, had Gerard give me another room.” You explained.
“Alright. Well ummm, I’m just gonna have a shower real quick and we can stop somewhere for breakfast, yeah?”
“I’d rather not. Just want to get home and have that talk.” You said to him.
“Sweetheart, I’m so fucking hungover.”
“Cal, you need to stop stalling.” You sighed.
“We can even start the conversation in the car! I just feel horrible right now and need to get something in my system.” He groaned.
Not even twenty minutes later you were sitting across from each other in the booth of a little diner off the first exit of the highway. You had already had your coffee, so you were just getting through some French toast while Cal nursed his second cup of coffee while he forcibly nibbled on some toast and bacon. You were looking at him expectantly and it appeared like he wanted to speak but the words were stuck somehow. You sighed in disappointment and surrendered, just glancing down to your food instead of him. You had just finished cutting off another piece of your French toast, just about ready to guide it into your mouth when he spoke up.
“I want a divorce.” Caleb’s words were low, but clear. Coward. He couldn’t do it while you were looking at him.
“Good. I do too.” You said cooly and he let out a quick, dry laugh. His response made you look up at him. “What?” You asked.
“That there is one of the things I…hate about you.” He said with a smile. His eyes weren’t full of contempt or spite, they were more amused than anything, it confused you for a second, “I used to love it though. S’one of the things I loved the most about you.” He said with a smile, “The way you’re so collected…so unaffected by everything.” He said and when you realized he wasn’t being a dick you smiled. “You’ve always been too good for me. I knew that.” He said with a hint of defeat in his voice.
“I met Dani. She threw up.” You said and he frowned upon hearing this.
“What’d you say to her to make her react that badly?” He questioned as he glanced down into his mug.
“Nothing. She just…felt so guilty I think? I actually pulled her to a trashcan before she puked all over herself.” You informed and he hummed.
“Well, it’s big of you to be nice to her.”
“Why? She didn’t do anything to me?” You pointed out and he smiled and nodded.
“Right.” He sighed before licking over his lips nervously. “It’s different with her.” He said and you now glanced down at your food again. “She’s just as brilliant, but in a more…reserved way.” He said and you chuckled.
“In a way that’s less intimidating, you mean?”
“Yeah, I guess so.” He said.
“Since when have I felt that way to you?” You questioned.
“I don’t know…I suppose I’ve always felt that way to some extent but over the last couple years it’s been…too much.” He explained. 
“Is it something I’ve done?” You asked. Wanting to know if there were things that you did to make him feel less than. Because if there were, you definitely wanted to clear the air with him about those things. 
“No. No. You’ve always been lovely.” He assured you. “It is an issue with me, 100%.”
“OK.” You said quietly. 
You still had so many questions for him, but were soon back on the road and you’d occasionally type them into your notes app as the questions arose. When you got home the tensions seemed to rise between you two. It was a nervous type of tension versus one of anger. You were very past the point of being angry at Cal for his cheating. You were still a bit irritated for the whole dinner thing, if you gave it some thought but your time with Harry had made the shit show worth it, so you were no longer dwelling on it.
“Should we get a couple drinks?” He asked you nodded and followed him to the bar area in your home. You hoisted yourself up onto one of the stools as he headed behind the bar. He just served you both a scotch on the rocks despite it only being about 11am. “Well, it’s five o’clock somewhere.” He said as he handed over your drink and you just knocked it back quickly while he savored his. 
“So Dani…how did that happen?” You asked him as he set his tumbler down.
“Just working together. She’s really good at stats, so I would always check my work with her. I felt like maybe I bugged her a lot, so I just started being a bit more friendly to not…annoy her as much, but I soon realized that I liked her vibe. It started out really platonic, like just work stuff, then we started getting lunch together every now and then, then afternoon coffees and ummm….yeah. It just happened over time.” He explained.
“How long?”
“We were together for a year.” He explained and you nodded. 
“And before then? Have you…been with other people?” You asked and he sighed.
“Yes.” He confirmed and you swallowed thickly.
“The whole time?” You asked, not being able to look at him.
“Yes.” He confirmed shamefully and that’s when the tears started to form.
“Jesus…” you whispered.
“I just don’t think I was ready to get married when we did.” He said and you took a deep breath before scoffing.
“It was your idea to get married, Cal!” You said with frustration and he sighed.
“I know…I just…thought that that’s what you wanted. Like when we talked about it, it just seemed like you were excited for it and I just thought that…if I didn’t show you that I was serious about you that you’d…leave me. That’s why I proposed to you.” 
“I mean who isn’t excited at the prospect of getting married but…did you want to marry me?” You asked him.
“I was sure I would want to down the line…like I didn’t do it just like that. I mean, I wouldn’t have asked if I didn’t think I would get there. I mean…I’ve always had a wandering eye…I just thought it would…change.”
“Well if you’ve never tried to work on that before it just wouldn’t suddenly go away, you know?” You said and he shrugged.
“Well, s’too late for that now.” He said.
“Yeah…” you whispered as you wiped a stray tear from under your eye, “So now you’re in love with Dani?”
“Yeah and she wants absolutely nothing to do with me so…” he said with disappointment.
“How did she find out?” You asked.
“I have a note on my phone about how to bring this up to you and she saw it. I had to explain it to her and she just blew up on me.” You looked at him like he was an idiot.
“I think anything less than that would’ve been a bad reaction, Cal. If she loves you too and just discovered that your whole relationship is actually an affair of course she lost her mind! She probably feels awful!” You scoffed.
“Well, I told her that I’m in love with her and that I wanted to be with her though. Like, I wanted to end things with you for her and like…I guess I hoped she’d come around with that information, but it’s been months and she will barely even look at me. ”
“Can you blame her?” You questioned and he sighed.
“Guess not. I don’t know if she’ll ever forgive me but…either way, I think that our marriage has run its course.” 
“I think so too.” You agreed and he sighed. “I ummm…knew you were cheating since the beginning of the year.” You confessed and his eyes met yours. “You accidentally made a reservation from our shared account while I was on there looking at a reimbursement from a client. I showed up to your office before the time of the reservation, thinking it was like a work thing, best case scenario.” You explained, “Obviously, you weren’t there… but then I started noticing other things and inconsistencies when you’d talk to me about supposed work trips…and I just…didn’t know how to bring it up.”
“It wasn’t your responsibility to.” He said and well, that much was true, “Honestly, I haven’t been happy with you for a long time, Y/N. I should’ve said something about it when my feeling started to change. I’m really sorry, you didn’t deserve this.” He apologized sincerely.
“Thank you.” You said and he nodded.
“So ummm, I think we need to meet with Shawn to draw up some divorce papers.” 
“Yeah…I’ll call him tomorrow morning, see if he has some time this week.”
“Perfect. Ummm, I think I should probably go stay somewhere else.”
“Yeah, if you want to.” You said to him and he nodded.
“I actually ummm, already have another place in the city. It’ll be easier with work and all.”
“Oh! Ummm, yeah that’s alright then.”
“It’s with my money by the way. I haven’t used anything we’ve put together for that. Or for Dani. Or any woman for that matter.” He said, as if that would somehow make all of it better.
“Alright, well thanks.” You chuckled and he shook his head. 
“Again, I’m really sorry for all of this, Y/N.” Cal said and you smiled sadly.
“Yeah, me too.” You whispered.
“OK, I’m going to pack a bag. Just let me know what Shawn says.”
“Will do.” You said before he chugged down the rest of his drink and then left quietly. 
You still had so many questions, but you didn’t know that they were even worth asking anymore. The more Caleb had spoken the worse things had gotten for you. You sniffled a bit, but just held in all of your tears because he really wasn’t worth it. You slid off of the counter and washed the tumblers before setting them on the rack beside the small sink to drip dry. You then reached for your phone and texted Cecilia to see if she was available for dinner. Thankfully she was and you just avoided Caleb by doing miscellaneous tasks around the house until he was gone with a large suitcase and duffle bag.
You got showered and then ordered in a fat pizza so that you and Cecilia could binge out a bit while you shared what had happened. She knew that you suspected Cal of cheating and that there was plenty of evidence against him, but wait until she heard all of this…and well, Cece’s responses never disappointed.
“That dog!” She gasped when you finished telling her about how he said he’d always been sleeping with other people. Now you were in tears because you were grieving your life…your time…your youth! You were so young when you got married to Caleb but you were in love with him then, so you thought it wasn’t a bad idea. But you wish you’d been less naive, you wished you’d listened to your family and your friends who were concerned about this decision. For the first time in your life you felt like you were stupid…over a man’s mistakes! It infuriated you that you felt like that. Why should you feel bad or regretful over things you’d done out of love? It made no sense, but here you were, actually feeling regret for marrying Caleb.
“Do not bring sweet, innocent dogs into this.” You hiccuped before setting your wine glass down. God, you’d be in the shit tomorrow with the hangover you knew you’d have. You had a bunch of meetings with some potential vendors the next day since the lady you used for all your tents and table rentals was moving out of state and taking her business with her. Plus you now had to contact your lawyer to tell him about the divorce. It was just going to be a bad day tomorrow. 
“You’re right.” Cece said with a pout, just as drunk as you were, “What a scum bag.” She finished and you sighed.
“Do you remember Harry?” You asked randomly and she turned to you with a furrow in her brow.
“Harry from the club?” She asked and you nodded as you sniffled.
“That’s his boss.” You said and then bit your lip, “We…fucked…well he did all of the fucking…” you confessed and she turned to you, jaw on the ground.
“You did not!”
“I did.”
“That night?”
“Yeah.” You confessed. “I haven’t been able to stop thinking about him this entire time. Like he was so fucking wonderful! And ummm, last night too while Cal was off somewhere, drunk off his ass. Harry railed me in the kitchen until my legs were as weak as overcooked noodles and then he licked tiramisu off my tits and I have a huge crush on him!” You blurted out and Cece started screaming and laughing. You both looked insane, all snotty with swollen eyes from crying together and now screaming and giggling like school girls over the most fantastic lay of your life.
“Oh my god! He’s so hot…even licked tiramisu off your tits…that sounds like a dream…” she hummed in approval.
“It really is.” You said quietly. “I mean, he’s always so nice to me. That first time, at the hotel, he told me if I was his he’d never take me for granted like Cal does.” You said more solemnly.
“Sounds like he likes you too.”
“Oh, he does…Even suggested that we just be friends til everything gets sorted out with Cal, which is so sweet of him.”
“He sounds fake.”
“Right!?” You exclaimed, “Like way too good to be true.”
“If he’s so perfect why isn’t he with someone?”
“He did mention before that he hadn’t met someone who he really wanted to settle down with, so he’d just been seeing people very casually.”
“Awww…what if you’re the one he wants that with?” She cooed in her drunkenness and despite the butterflies in your tummy at the mere idea of getting to date Harry, you tutted.
“I don’t think we know each other that well.” You reasoned, “As long as he’s not all fragile like Cal I think there’s a chance. I mean, I toughened up because Cal said I was too soft to be an entrepreneur! I honed in on those traits and skills. I stepped into my power, not just as a business owner, but as a woman! And now he tells me I’m too abrasive and intimidating? Like…what if Harry likes those qualities in me now, but like Cal, he’ll soon discover that he wants someone who’s of an easier disposition as a partner?”
“You mean a pushover?”
“I don’t think women who aren’t outspoken are pushovers…” you clarified, “But like, some of us are just a bit more outspoken, you know? I don’t think I’m tactless or rude about it, and certainly not emasculating-”
“Men emasculate themselves. If Caleb has never felt that he’s been good enough for you then at one point or another all of this would’ve ended anyway. The problem in this marriage was him, babe. Get it through your head! Don’t let him make you feel like being who you are and stepping into your power were the problems. Like you said, he wanted that for you and now that he feels less than he thinks it’s bad? Sexist. Sexist. Sexist!” Cece said with harsh claps for added emphasis and you smiled.
“You’re right.” You ceded.
“Of course I am!” Cece guffawed and you sighed. “Do you think Harry will fire him?” She asked.
“Harry’s not petty like that, I don’t see why he would. I mean, Cal’s good at his job and like, as much as Harry and I are friendly, my personal problems with Caleb have nothing to do with their work, you know?”
“I guess you’re right. Though, I do think it’d be more satisfying for everyone involved if Cal stays working there and has to see you with his boss.” Cece said and you laughed.
“I wouldn’t want to rub his face in it…”
“Oh please, what do you think he did to you last night at that dinner, babe? Intentional or not, he set you up! Genuinely, how did he think people would react to the news of him being married out of nowhere?” She questioned,  “You need to stop taking the high road and just hit below the belt, just once! It feels so good, I swear it does!” Cece pleaded with you.
“Yeah, we’ll see…” you hummed with a smile. “Like I don’t want to make him feel bad on purpose, you know?”
“Fuck that! He deserves it and you deserve to see Karma doing her best work to restore balance to the universe.” She said simply and you giggled. Count on Cece to always want to see justice served, it’s not that you didn’t, but you just didn’t like forcing Karma’s hand. You knew it would all happen in it’s due time and you could wait. 
… ONE MONTH LATER …
You were doing really well on your own. You’d started putting more effort into your business, which saw it growing. You’d started taking better care of yourself, and much to Cece’s dismay, channeled your rage into a new hobby - gardening. Which as peaceful as it was meant to be, was actually full of rage because you absolutely hated it. You hated dirt, you hated how needy plants were…but were trying to learn to love it. She’d scolded you many times over the fact that you weren’t just plowing Harry every chance you got. But like you had explained to her and him before, you just needed to figure things out for yourself before you involved anyone new in your new life. You had spoken to him on the phone a few weeks back for an hour, just catching up and checking in on each other, but apart from that he was giving you space which you desperately needed.
Maybe you didn’t love Caleb anymore, but you were still grieving everything that could’ve been. No one who gets married out of love goes in thinking that it’s going to end in divorce. Sure, it’s always a possibility, but every person went into it hoping that they would beat the odds, not become a statistic, yet here you were. Thankfully though, the divorce proceedings were going swimmingly thanks to the prenup, which you had insisted on if only to prove to Caleb all those years ago that you were in it for love and not his money. Cal had always been very generous though and helped with a lot of your debts from school and other big expenses from when you were younger and struggling. But thanks to that, you were both leaving the marriage without many losses. Though Cal’s generosity was once again proven when he assured you that he’d take care of the legal fees since he’d been the one who’d ended the marriage long before you guys took a step towards divorce.
You were still trying to find a place of your own to live. Cal had charged you with overseeing any renovations on the house that would make it more marketable so at least for the time being you weren’t being rushed out of the house. But you were debating on whether you should stay in the suburbs or head into the city. However, the more you looked into it the more you were convinced that New York City was not a place you wanted to live. Sure, it was gorgeous, but it was a bit gross, prone to flooding, infested with tons of critters, and those were just a few deal breakers among other inconveniences. And finding a place that had minimal exposure to all of these things would cost you an arm and a leg. Also, your clientele was largely in the suburb areas, so you were staying put for now until you found something else.
You’d already done a lot of renovating to the home when you purchased it, so there wasn’t too much apart from some flooring changes to the staircase and renovating the half bath and it’s connected outdoor shower that was used for your luxurious saltwater pool. You had just shown out the flooring guy when your work phone started ringing and you glanced down to see a number you didn’t recognize and let it go to voicemail as you weren’t really able to take any new clients right now. It was a bit later in the day when you realized that this caller had left a voicemail. So you put it on speaker as you opened up your fridge to grab a snack when you heard a shaky exhale through the speaker.
“Ummm, hi Y/N. This Is Daniela, I got your number from Tamika. I hope you don’t mind.” She spoke nervously, “Uh, I was wondering if you were available for a talk over lunch, o-or dinner or just some drinks sometime this week? I just wanted to talk about ummm…Caleb.” She said, “This is my cell, so feel free to call me or text me. Ummm, yeah, bye.”
You bit your lip as you thought about it for a moment. As much as you didn’t want to get involved in the throws of their affair, you at least wanted to clear the air with her and assure her that you didn’t blame her for the demise of your marriage. You had your divorce hearing in a month and you didn’t want to start making Cal think you were ganging up on him with his mistress, so you wanted to tread lightly. You decided to consult with your trusty best friend before calling Dani back.
“Hey girl!” Cece greeted cheerfully and you instantly smiled.
“Hey! How’s your day?” You asked and she hummed.
“It’s been…interesting.” She said, “But I have a feeling it’s about to get better.” She sang and you chuckled.
“I’m just calling for your input, nothing to do with Harry-”
“A damn shame.” She interjected and you sniggered.
“Dani called me. She wants to meet up with me.” You said and Cece perked up.
“Ooh…”
“I don’t know if I should go though.”
“OK, why not?” She asked.
“I just don’t want Caleb to think I’m plotting against him. Like, we’re just so close to finalizing the divorce and going our own ways. I don’t want to stir up any trouble.” You explained.
“Then just tell him you’re gonna talk to her. You don’t have to keep it a secret.” Cece said and you groaned.
“I know! But I know he’s going to say no and give me shit about it-”
“Well too fucking bad! At least you’re giving him a warning!” She said and you giggled.
“Right…I might also be nervous because…I’m thinking of perhaps asking to see Harry after.” You confessed and Cece’s excited shriek made you giggle, “Not for sex.” You said.
“Boo…” she grumbled and you rolled your eyes.
“I just…miss him a bit. He’s been so understanding, but like…I forget about the stress when he’s around. He makes me feel…really good.” You said and Cece cooed.
“Awww babe, I really think you should talk to Dani and then get any sympathy you have for Cal fucked out of you so good you don’t have problems for the next few years.” She said and you laughed loudly.
“God, Cecelia…” you scoffed.
“It’s what you deserve.” She said simply and you smiled.
“You know, I should just call you when I need to hear what I want to hear.” You mused and she cackled.
“What’re best friends for?” She asked and you smiled. After agreeing to meet up over the weekend for brunch at yours, you decided to call Dani back. You agreed to meet for lunch on Friday, which was good, hopefully you could arrive a bit early and surprise Harry. Your eyebrows furrowed when you heard the front door open and walked over to the entrance of the home to see Caleb walking through the door.
“Hey!” You greeted him with a smile as you approached him and he smiled as well as he swung the door shut and walked up to you and quickly kissed your cheek.
“Hey, you look great!” He complimented you, “How’s it been?” he asked as he pulled back.
“Good. The flooring guy just left a bit ago, he’s gonna remove the carpet from the stairs. And then the contractor is coming tomorrow to see about the pool shower/bathroom.”
“Perfect.” He smiled.
“Yeah. And what brings you here?” You asked.
“I have a business trip to San Diego.” He said as he made his way up the stairs, “It’s legit.” He added as he glanced back at you, wearing a smirk and you rolled your eyes.
“And you had to come here for?” You questioned, as you made your way into your previously shared bedroom that was now just yours.
“I need t’pack my lighter clothes. S’still summertime in California!  Or have you been gone so long you already forgot?” He asked as he walked into your closet and you plopped down onto the bed. “Can you grab my suitcase from the trunk of the car? I forgot it!”
“Yeah!” You called out and headed downstairs and grabbed his empty luggage from the car. Soon you were placing it on the bed and he was coming out with a few shirts. He seemed in a chipper mood, so you were going to bring up the Dani thing while he was.
“Should I take the yellow one?” He asked of the light yellow shirt he brought out.
“No, it kinda washes you out. Also you’ll look like Dwight Schrute.” You said and he chuckled.
“You’re right.” He said and set it aside and grabbed another instead.
“It’s good you’re here though, I was actually going to call you about something later.”
“What was it?” He asked as he inspected another shirt.
“Ummm…Dani called me.” You said and he glanced up at you. You saw the glint of hope in his eyes.
“What did she want?”
“Just to talk. We’re gonna have lunch on Friday.” You said and he sighed, “And I don’t intend to…shit talk you to her or anything. I think she’s just…feeling a bit lonely. Probably wants to make sure I don’t hate her or something.” You said and he nodded.
“Yeah, I think she needs that.” He said and you hummed.
“How’ve you been doing?”
“I mean, way better at work now that I have nothing else to do.” He said with a small smile, “Just getting by, I guess… waiting every day hoping that she’ll talk to me…let me explain…anything really.” He said a bit sadly as he proceeded to fold up some trousers, “I didn’t know I could feel so strongly about a person. I mean, I thought that with you that was as much love as I could feel. We just connected so well you know?”
“Oh I was there…” you recalled with a smile and he did as well.
“I felt challenged. Like that sounds…bad, but you were something to work towards, you know? You kept me on the edge of my seat. So good that you made me want to be better. To be more…hence the whole CFO thing. I felt like I needed to aim higher.” He explained.
“But with her?”
“With her I felt like…enough for the first time in a really long time. And I can’t discredit any of our marriage, because you’ve pushed me to achieve a lot of the things I wanted to achieve. But I don’t know, it just kind of felt like…”
“Like we never quite found the sweet spot?” You asked and he nodded.
“Yeah. It’s like happiness was always just out of reach. Like I could see it, but I couldn’t get there.” He explained, “Was it like that for you?” He asked and you shrugged.
“I guess so, but I didn’t know it until you said it just now.” You explained as you extended your hand asking him to hand you some of his undershirts to fold and pack up. He did so easily, “I mean, as you know, my parents are still married. But they’ve never been all that affectionate with each other so I didn’t think there was anything wrong with how we were you know? Like that was the picture I had growing up, always striving for more, and well, they’ve made it this far.” You said and he hummed.
“Right… my parents are like that too. Do you think they settled?”
“Well historically, men settle for partners more than women.” You explained and his eyebrows arched upon hearing that, “It’s called settling for Ms. Good-Enough. So men are more likely to settle for a partner who meets most of their expectations rather than the person they really want out of fear of missing the train, or whatever people call it.” You said, “At the end of the day I guess we’re all scared of being alone.” You said as you dropped a neat stack of his undershirts in his luggage.
“Yeah, I guess so.” He hummed, “Do you think Dani will ever forgive me?”
“Yeah, I’m sure she will but I don’t think that necessarily means she’ll give you another chance.” You said to him and he frowned, “I mean, you have to understand just how humiliating this is for her. You let her fall in love with you and made her think that she was your one and only, only for her to discover that she was actually your side chick! I mean, that doesn’t mean your feelings weren’t real, but it’s…shitty to find out you’re the other woman. It’s happened to me before in college and it sucks. Moreso when I got bitch slapped for “seducing a taken man” when I had no idea he was taken! I think that’s why I’m nice to her because it’s not her fault and I shouldn’t take out my frustration on her. Like it sucks to be in that position. You wonder if there’s any world in which you would’ve been the first choice. Or if you were the first choice, would that person still go off and find someone else? And it feels like…you just can’t win. Either way you feel horrible about yourself and it doesn’t matter how much love exists, you still feel stupid and foolish for falling for something like that. I know that you love her, Cal, but you really hurt her and you need to respect how she navigates this.”
“Can you at least tell her to talk to me? I just want to properly apologize to her. Not some rushed interaction like we’ve had. I won’t try and change her mind I just need her to know that she…means everything to me and that I fucked up. I need her to know that.”
“Cal, I don’t want to mettle. I don’t want to be her friend, I just need her to know that I don’t blame her.” You said and he nodded in understanding.
“Do you hate me?” He asked after a beat of silence.
“No, Cal. I just wish…I knew about all of this early on so that we could try to…not make such a big mess.” You said and he smiled.
“Yeah. Next time.” He said and you smiled. “What about you? Anyone new on your radar?” He asked and you considered talking to him about Harry for a moment, but quickly decided against it, you could keep this to yourself until you actually figured it out.
“No, just been focusing on me and the business. Hanging out with Cece a bit much…been drinking way too much on the weekends.” You said and he chuckled.
“Cece is fun.” He said and you nodded, “I’m surprised she hasn’t hooked you up with the eligible bachelors of New York.” He chuckled.
“Oh believe me, she has tried!” You laughed as you reached over and grabbed another pair of slacks he had brought out.
“Of course. She acts fast.” He said and you nodded. “Well I am always rooting for you. I hope you know that.”
“I am rooting for you too.” You assured him, “So long as you’re being good.” You said and he grinned.
“Yeah, lesson learned.” He stated with a smile, “My flight doesn’t leave until 9:30pm. Want to have some dinner and drop me off?” He asked and you side eyed him.
“Only if I can drive the Quattroporte.” You said and he grinned.
“Fine.” He agreed, much to your surprise. But he was lonely and just needed to be around someone. You felt bad for him, but there really wasn’t much you could do about that.
Cal’s flight was leaving from JFK so you drove a bit closer to get some dinner in that area. It was nice just chatting, talking about your plans after everything was finalized with your divorce. You took your time and were really enjoying how amicable things were between you two, and finally the time came to drop him off at the terminal.
“Thank you for being so gracious about everything, Y/N. I don’t deserve it after everything I’ve put you through. You’re…remarkable and I was right.” He said and you furrowed your eyebrows in confusion.
“About?”
“You being too good for me.” He said and you smiled at him and shook your head.
“Have a good flight.”
“Thanks.” He said before getting out of the car. He grabbed his luggage and with one final wave he was heading inside and you were heading back home. 
The next two days went by rather quickly and you were now nervously trying to pick something out to wear to lunch with Dani that would probably also make Harry swoon just a bit. You were planning on getting there a bit early to see if Harry had a few minutes and were manifesting that he was available. You ended up choosing to wear a nice fall outfit with some flared, tan corduroy pants, a thin black turtleneck long sleeve, and some pointed black, heeled boots. You grabbed your purse and hurried out and took off for the city. You had no idea why you felt nervous, but your stomach was in complete knots the entire drive. 
Finally, you were inside and riding up the elevator to the administrative floor, fidgeting with the rings on your fingers. It was nearing lunch time so there were people hurrying about as you calmly made your way past reception, the other offices, and back to where his office was, according to the map you scanned when you walked off of the elevator. You saw Tamika straightening out a few things at a desk near Harry’s office and approached her.
“Hey Tamika!” You smiled at her and she glanced up at you.
“Hey Y/N! What a nice surprise to see you up here.” And then her smile faltered a bit, “Oh ummm, Dani told me she was meeting with you. I’m sorry about everything with Cal.” She said and you shook your head.
“It’s alright. I knew about it a while ago. At least we can end it amicably.” You said and she nodded.
“Yeah, as long as he’s not an asshole about it.” She said with you sniggered and nodded.
“No, he’s been very good about it.” You assured him, “Are you heading to lunch?”
“I’m actually, leaving for the day. I only have afternoon classes today.” She explained.
“Oh OK.” You said and she smiled.
“Cal’s away on business in San Diego but-” 
“I actually wanted to talk to Mr. Styles-er Harry for minute. Is he in by any chance?”
“Yeah, he’s in there.” She smiled, “You can just go on in.” She assured you with a smile and you nodded.
“Thank you! I hope class goes well.”
“Thanks! Have a good weekend.” She said before grabbing her bag and waving as she headed off. You waved back before turning around and walking the few steps over to Harry’s office. You gave a few knocks before pushing open the heavy, partially frosted glass door and peeking in. 
As soon as Harry detected some movement he glanced up from the documents in his hands and you saw his face light up at the sight of you.
“Oh my god, hi! What’re you doing here?” He questioned as he immediately pushed himself up from his seat as you headed towards him. You hummed happily as he hugged you and you hugged him back, letting your body fit against his so perfectly.
“Dani asked to meet me to talk over lunch.” You informed as you started to pull back, “Thought I’d drop in and see if I could stick around in the city afterwards. Maybe we can go to dinner?” You suggested and he sighed as his hands found yours and glanced down.
“Sorry, tonight’s no good. I have plans.” He said with a small pout.
“That’s alright, kinda dropped in unannounced didn’t I?” You shrugged.
“Just for transparency’s sake, it’s a date.” He shared, “It was a set up.” He sighed, “I don’t know why my friends meddle-”
“Because they care about you.” You said and he chuckled.
“They’re really bad match makers though.” He chuckled and you giggled.
“Well good thing it’s just a set up then.” You said and he grinned.
“Still get nervous though. Kinda seems unfair to agree to date people when you’re not interested in them.”
“Very true, but hey at least you’ll be nice about it.” You said and he smiled and nodded.
“Yeah, always.” He assured as his thumb ran over your knuckles gently. “What about tomorrow? Do you have plans?” He asked.
“Just brunch with Cece. Gonna get day drunk and lounge around in the pool.” You said with a grin and he smiled.
“That sounds great. Can I crash it? I hear you have a really nice pool.” He hummed and your smile widened.
“Yeah! I think Cece would love that more than I would.” you giggled and he chuckled.
“She was cool.” He hummed and you smiled.
“I’ll let her know you said that.” You said and he nodded.
“Yeah, please do. So ummm, should I bring something?”
“Ummm, we’re doing more breakfast-y food, so I think it’ll be best to make that at mine.”
“Settled. I’ll bring the champagne then.” He concluded with a smirk and you laughed happily and hugged him again. He seemed surprised, but was quick to hug you back.
“Oh, I’ve missed you.” You hummed without really thinking too much about it and he chuckled.
“I’ve missed you as well.” He said quietly, his large hands slid down to your waist and you pulled back. Your eyes met his and then fluttered down to his lips.
“I know we said just friends but-”
“That’s alright, I can make an exception.” He whispered as he leaned down and attached his lips to yours. You hummed happily and let your hands glide up his brawny chest before draping them over his shoulders, your bodies moved closer together, allowing your kiss to deepen. He gently nipped at your bottom lip which made you smile, “What?” He breathed out, his smile matching yours now.
“I just really like how you kiss.” You whispered and he smiled before leaning back in and you teased at his bottom lip with your tongue. He opened his mouth a bit more to let you in. You moaned against him when you finally got to taste his tongue. He sighed as his hands slid down to your bottom before squeezing and then giving a very quick little spank which made you gasp and pull back from the sloppy kiss you were sharing. “Mr. Styles!” You exclaimed with a shocked expression.
“Sorry, these pants are very nice.” He mumbled and you smirked.
“These I did wear for you.” You admitted.
“Well thank you, I love ‘em.”
“You’re welcome.” You giggled.
“Maybe I can get in them sometime.” He hummed with a smug look, “Like just to try ‘em on, they’re nice.” He clarified, but the mischievous glint in his eyes confirmed his double entendre and you chuckled. “So what time tomorrow?”
“Noon-ish? I’ll text you my address.” You said.
“Perfect. Can’t wait.” He hummed before dipping down again and kissing you once more. Just as things were getting steamy your cellphone started ringing. You two broke away from the kiss with a wet sound and you sighed as you pulled your purse between the two of you. You saw it was Dani calling and you answered. You glanced up at Harry as you brought the phone to your ear.
“Hello?”
“Hi Y/N, I’m just wrapping up. Should I meet you in the lobby?”
“Yeah, that’s good. See you there.” You said and then hung up.
“Time to go?”
“Yeah.”
“You nervous?” He asked, hands sliding into your back pockets and you giggled as he did this. He then started pushing you closer to him again.
“A little bit. Obviously she wants to talk about Caleb, but I just don’t know what about. M’not at all gossipy, so I hope it’s not just to talk shit.” You chuckled.
“A little shit talking might take place.”
“Well, yeah she can vent if she needs to. But Cal and I have been able to be very amicable and I don’t want to do anything that ruins that vibe. I did tell him I was meeting her and he said it was fine.” You share.
“Well I don’t know Dani all that well but from what Tamika tells me she’s really sweet. And so are you, so I’m sure it’ll be fine.” He assured you.
“Right.” You exhaled and he chuckled.
“So I’ll see you tomorrow?”
“Yeah. And do me a favor, bomb the date, yeah?” You joked and he knocked his head back in laughter.
“I promise you I’ll do my very worst.” He assured you and you chuckled before tiptoeing and kissing his cheek before he slipped his hands out of your back pockets and let you go. “See you tomorrow.”
“See ya’!” You sang before hurrying out of his office and back to the elevator. 
Once in the lobby you quickly found Dani and shook her hand as she officially introduced herself. The place she had in mind for lunch was a little cafe around the corner. So as you walked over you made some small talk. Soon enough you were seated and reading over the menus provided. You were a bit anxious to know what it was that she wanted to talk to you about and as she kept hopping from topic to topic about food and drinks and dessert you started to get a bit impatient.
“Good afternoon, what can I get you guys?” The waiter suddenly came up and you glanced up at him and ordered your food and drink first and then Dani went ahead and ordered. After he left, assuring you the food would be out soon you glanced up at her and she smiled a bit nervously.
“So what did you want to talk about?” You asked her and she sighed.
“I just wanted to clarify that I didn’t know about you at all when I agreed to be with Caleb. I feel really guilty about it though and I don’t know how to make it stop.” She confessed.
“Well I can assure you, I have no beef with you. I don’t blame you at all for his behavior or for his choices.” 
“So you’re not getting divorced because of me?” She asked and you shook your head.
“Not you personally. I mean, Cal is in love with you and that made him realize that we needed to divorce. And for me learning about his relationship with you definitely was a factor in why I wanted. divorce, but there are other factors to it as well. I mean, why wouldn't I divorce someone who doesn't love me?” you explained and she bit her lip.
“Has he cheated on you before?” She asked and you nodded.
“Yeah, for years apparently.” You sighed.
“Oh…” she said with a small frown.
“I only found out about his cheating at the start of the year. So when he was with you already. He hasn’t been with anyone else other than you lately though, if that’s of any consolation.”
“To some extent it is…I mean, he keeps trying to talk to me and apologize and explain himself, but I don’t think there’s a justifiable explanation for any of this.” Dani said and you nodded.
“Yeah, I agree.” 
“I love him. I love him so much, the last few months have been torture, but I’d be a fool to trust him after what he did to me. And now hearing about how this is just something he does…like it doesn’t just stop because you love someone, you know?”
“That’s precisely what I told him the other day. He’s made a habit of his infidelity and there’s no way that’s going to change unless he really works hard at breaking that habit.”
“Right…and I mean, I’d have to be an idiot to forgive him and get back with him.” She sighed.
“Not necessarily. I mean, if you trust him and you work together to make sure you’re on the same page and that you expect the same things out of the relationship it could work. I mean, it’s all based on trust and if you trust that he won’t screw up again, then great! But if you don’t trust him there’s no sense in putting yourself through something like that. You’ll just be full of doubt and miserable and no one deserves to constantly be living on edge like that, you know?”
“Yeah…you’re right.” Dani exhaled in surrender and you frowned a bit.
“Dani, Caleb does love you though. And he is sorry for lying like this. He asked me to tell you that.” You explained.
“I know. But I mean this was maybe my first real adult relationship and like…to discover that I was just the side chick!?” She exclaimed and your frown deepened.
“I’m really sorry, Dani. You didn’t deserve that.”
“I know! It’s why I can’t…I can’t trust him or give him another chance without feeling like a fool for it.”
“Well, seems to me you know which direction you’re leaning towards.”
“I do. It’s just…kind of hard to hold my ground on it.” She explained.
“I mean, you can always change your mind down the line. And well, something tells me Cal will be waiting as long as you need even if it is just to tell him that it’s done for good.” You said to her.
“I just don’t want to waste his time-”
“Girl, he’s wasted both of our times! He’ll be fine.” You emphasized and she chuckled.
“Very true.” She shrugged.
“And look, the last thing you want to do is waste your own valuable time! I’ve been with Cal since I was 23. We got married when I was only 24 and he just told me that he got married to me because he was scared I would leave him if he didn’t commit big right away. All those years are time neither of us will get back and we weren’t even with the right person!” You said and she sighed and shook her head sadly, “I know you’re not asking for my opinion, but if I can just impose it for a second I’d say to just choose you. Heal from the heartbreak and when you’re feeling more level headed about it all revisit it. See if you still love him or if everything has worn off. But make sure that whatever step you take next is for your benefit alone.” You advised and she nodded.
After that part of the conversation you two just ate and talked a bit more about your next steps. She wanted to know how you were moving on from this as well, which in reality was just a taking it day by day approach. Just from your time with her, you gathered that Dani was smart and very sweet and you could see the similarities between your way of being and hers. She was still learning how to assert herself though. For lack of a better term, she was still a bit of a pushover and maybe Cal liked that. It helped him keep her by his side. Thankfully, you had learned better in grad school. You’d learned the hard way not to bend over backwards for everyone and you could still be kind and helpful, just not at your own expense. When Cal told you that you were just harder to deal with than Dani you thought maybe it was an issue with you, but it was all with him. Dani was easier to manipulate because she still considered Cal’s feelings even when it was tearing her apart. You hoped that something you said to her resonated and made her think twice about her choices with Cal in the future. He seemed to be intimidated by women who had owned their power and well, you just couldn’t see yourself being with anyone like that ever. 
All along you thought that he was the one encouraging you and empowering you to do more out of love. Empowering you to tag on a second masters. Empowering you to go for jobs you qualified for. Empowering you to pursue your passion and start your own business. And you let him because you thought the he was just being supportive and wanting to see you grow and excel. But now that you looked at your life and your accomplishments, you saw how he felt that he had given all of that to you. But after you were done with school and found your confidence and worth you didn’t need his help as much. You were more than capable on your own and that made him feel less than. Like he wasn’t good enough for you because you didn’t need his help to succeed. Suddenly everything just felt so transactional between the two of you and that just put a bad taste in your mouth. But at least you were going to be free of it very soon.
**********
Thankfully you beat the rush hour traffic out of the city and were able to stop off at the grocery store to pick up the food you’d be having for brunch the following day along with something to make for dinner. You also got yourself a nice bottle of wine and decided that homemade pizza was the way to go for dinner. Your mood improved when you remembered that Harry would be joining you tomorrow as well and you tidied up around the house with a little more pep in your step. After the cleaning bits you were in for a well deserved shower, so you washed up, exfoliated and shaved, and were soon rushing down the stairs in a big t-shirt and some tiny shorts to make your pizza. Your stomach was growling intensely, begging you to eat as soon as possible.
You were playing some of your happy music, singing and dancing around as you prepped your pizza while the oven pre-heated. Everything was going according to plan until your doorbell rang and you pulled up your phone to check the camera to see who could be out there at nearly 8 at night.
“Oh my god…” you whispered to yourself in shock as you saw none other than Harry, standing at the door with a bouquet of flowers in his hand and a tote bag over his shoulder. Your heart just about melted at the sight of him nervously biting his lip as he waited for an answer. What was he doing here? You took some calming breaths as you set your phone down and scurried out to the front door to let him in. You unlocked it and opened it up with an inevitably large smile that he was already mirroring upon seeing you on the other side of the door. 
“Hi.” He greeted you with a slightly bashful grin.
“Hi! What’re you doing here?” You asked him through a nervous chuckle.
“I know it’s a bit late now, but I-uh was wondering if you still wanted to do dinner? With me?” He asked hopefully and you bit your lip to suppress your smile for a moment.
“Your timing couldn’t be more impeccable. I was actually just about to throw a pizza in the oven.” You said, pointing behind you with your thumb. 
“Really?” He grinned and you nodded.
“Really, ummm come on in!” You chuckled and opened the door wider and he stepped forward. He immediately looked around the foyer before his eyes settled on you as you locked up. When you turned and saw him taking you in, you glanced down at your choice of pajamas bashfully. “Sorry, I’m a bit slob-by right now.” You explained.
“You’re not slob-by.” He assured with a small smile, “You look cute.” He shrugged and you laughed a bit, “M’serious. Like, yeah you usually look so put together, but this is nice too. You look cozy.” He assured and you chuckled.
“Thank you.” You accepted his compliment as he chuckled as well.
“Oh, got these for you.” He said as he extended the arrangement of flowers towards you and you took them.
“Thank you, they’re lovely.” You thanked him, “They’re not re-gifted are they?” You teased with a smirk and he chuckled.
“No, I swear they’re not!” He assured you, “I ummmm, didn’t end up going to the set up thing. I may have…sent her a $200 DoorDash gift card…” he said and you burst into laughter.
“No!” You gasped.
“You said, verbatim, do my worst!” He defended through a chuckle.
“I actually never said that. You said it yourself! I only told you to bomb it, but obviously, I was kidding.” You laughed as you shook your head, your eyes meeting his.
“No you weren’t.” He hummed knowingly as you bit your lip and shrugged.
“OK, I wasn’t…but that’s…I can’t believe you did that.” You chuckled as you shook your head again, “And here I was thinking you were incapable of being an asshole.” You teased.
“I also brought you some tiramisu.” He said as he raised the shoulder that had the tote bag hanging on it. “For like… old time’s sake.” He said.
“And I was right! So completely incapable of being an asshole.” You said and he chuckled, “Come on back to the kitchen.” You said and he followed you trough the house. “Can I get you anything to drink?” You asked as you set down the flowers and opened up the fridge, “I have…a very lovely red blend chilling in the fridge, I have…Coke Zero, water, or if you want a cocktail you can look through the bar.” You said as you turned around.
“Water is good for now.”
“Cold?”
“Please.” He said and you reached in for the pitcher of water and set it on the counter.
“Can I hand you this cake?”
“Yeah, of course!” You said as he pulled out the individual serving of it and you set it on a shelf in there.
“Can I help you with anything?” He asked you.
“Ummm, let me hand you a vase for the flowers.” You said as you scurried around to get one out. And soon you were handing it over as he got some water in it, while you served him a glass from the pitcher.
“Here’s your water.” You said setting it down beside him.
“Thank you.”
“Yeah, of course!” You smiled, “Ummm, I only bought pineapple for my pizza.” You said.
“Oh! I mean, I already knew you had good taste, but that’s just perfect.” He hummed with a grin and you rolled your eyes playfully at just how over the top he was.
“Glad you like it, if you didn’t I would’ve had to ask you to leave.” You joked as you headed back over to where you had left you little can of drained pineapples unattended upon his arrival.
“That serious is it?”
“Oh yeah! Huge dealbreaker.” You responded smugly as he came up beside you.
“You know what my dealbreaker is?” He asked as he looked down at the pizza.
“What?” You questioned.
“When people are light-handed with the cheese.” He said to you, “Look at this!” He reprimanded playfully and you giggled.
“It’s not that I want to be stingy, I just have to be mindful of my tummy.” You defended. “Specially now that I have an unexpected guest!” Harry laughed at your excuse.
“Fine. But next time I’m gonna bring you those Lactaid pills so you can eat all the cheese you want.” He said and you smiled up at him.
“Wow, my hero. That’s so romantic of you.” You responded and he hummed.
“I know right.” He hummed smugly as you scattered the pineapple all over the pizza’s surface. “So how was lunch with Daniela?” He asked.
“Good. I think she just needed to talk about her plans. Cal had mentioned to me that I was abrasive, but I think he just likes that Dani is still quite…easy to talk into things. I mean, I was that way when we were first together because he’s older. I assumed he was wiser, knew better, knew more than I did, you know? So she still gives a lot of weight to how her calls will impact him and his feelings.”
“I see.” 
“Yeah, so I just reminded her to ensure that whatever she does next, that she’s doing what’s best for herself. Like, I know Cal hopes she’ll take him back and maybe she wants to, but she’s doubtful, you know?”
“Yeah, understandably so.”
“Right. And I mean, I also explained to her that living like that, with doubt in your partner is just awful and draining. So to only get back with him if she knew for a fact that everything was different this time.”
“Do you think it would be different?” Harry asked.
“I think so…Cal is so in love with her and I’m sure he would put in far more effort than he ever did with me. But at the end of the day he still broke her trust and that’s always going to be hard to recover, you know?”
“Yeah. Well, I think it’s good you were able to hear her out, give her a bit of advice.” He hummed and moved out of your way and hurried to open the door of the oven so that you could slide the tray in.
“Alright we have about 20 minutes.” You said as you closed up the door and then reached for your phone to set a timer.
“Cool. I’ll help you clean up a bit.”
“Oh, thank you.” You smiled and then just asked him to wash the things you had used to spread the sauce and the few dishes in the sink while you packed up the things you had used for the pizza. “So are you driving back home tonight and then coming back in the morning?”
“No, I was gonna get a room somewhere close by. I do own a home close by but I have a tenant there right now.” He said and you hummed.
“Well you can  stay here if you want?” You offered, “We have guest rooms and that way you won’t need to have another expense.”
“Only if you’re OK with it, Y/N.”
“Of course! I’ve stayed at your holiday home free of charge, let me at least do the same for you.” You smiled and he nodded.
“OK, thank you. I’ll go get my overnight bag from the car and ummm, possibly change into something more comfortable.”
“Yeah, sure!” You said and he hurried out to his car. 
You text Cece quickly to let her know that Harry had come by tonight and she responded so fast you swear she broke a record. She asked you to be extra nice to him, which you knew what she meant by that, but to please let her know if she needed to just find an excuse to cancel on you for brunch. You rolled your eyes upon reading that, but soon Harry was coming back into the kitchen.
“Let me give you the room upstairs.” You said before guiding him up the steps. “Sorry, we’re renovating the bathroom in the room downstairs. It has a door to the backyard as well, so we use it for the pool.” You shared as you reached the top of the stairs and flicked on the lights before you continued guiding him down the hallway.
“That’s alright. I’ll be closer if you need me. Or if I need you! You know, for safety reasons.” He tagged on and you sniggered as you stopped before the closed door. “Don’t laugh at me. You make me nervous.” He confessed lowly when you opened up the door to the room. You turned to him with some confusion as you moved aside to let him in.
“Do I really?” You asked him and he nodded as he stepped in further, “Why?” You questioned through a small laugh as you flicked on the lights. You were now a bit concerned with what he would say next. Would he be just like Caleb? Intimidated by a fully realized woman? Afraid that your power meant less power for him? 
“I just…don’t feel in control.” He explained with a slight furrow in his eyebrows as he set his bag down at the foot of the bed. “It’s not something that happens to me often so I don’t…know how to act sometimes.” He admitted with a nervous smile, “Like I just…word vomit or my thoughts get jumbled up, like they did just now, and it’s weird for me to feel this way.” He explained.
“Oh…” you said back quietly and then smiled. “Well, I must admit you make me nervous too.” You confessed as you stepped further into the room.
“See, I’d never know that.” He said with a small smile as you sat at the end of the bed as he proceeded to unzip his bag. “You always appear so poised and just collected.” He said as he removed his toiletries bag to get to his sleeping clothes.
“I assure you I am not.” You smiled nervously and then your smile faltered a bit. “That’s actually something that ummm…Caleb mentioned when he told me he wanted to get divorced. He said he used to love it and it’s one of the things he hates most about me now. I mean, he wasn't actually like, being a dick about it when he explained.” You said softly and Harry frowned as he looked up at you. “I guess he meant to say that he felt that I was emotionally impenetrable to some extent. Like I’m hiding behind the nonchalance?” You explained.
“Hey, look at me.” He said and you glanced up to him, “I don’t think you’re hiding. I think you’re just…maybe a little bit guarded.” He explained and you nodded, “And not in a way to elicit interest or speculation from others. S’just to ensure that you’re showing your vulnerability to the right people, to the people who you can trust. I don’t think I could ever hate that about you when it’s the thing that just…keeps me on my toes.” He smiled and you did as well, “I like it when you let me in and show me what exactly it is you’re thinking and feeling.” He explained.
“You’re right about it all. I mean, I used to be the biggest pushover, so now I just…ensure to be a bit more reserved to gauge who deserves more of me and who doesn’t. I don’t know, maybe to him it was some game, like I was playing hard to get or something? But it’s just that after being treated like a door mat for so long you start to toughen up, you know?”
“Yeah.” He hummed. “I don’t like that he gets to you like this.”
“Me either…I mean, usually he wouldn’t but like a part of me wants to feel some sense of responsibility for what happened so that there could be a logical explanation as to why he betrayed me this way. Like if there’s something, anything, I could fix or do better next time to prevent getting cheated on then I’ll be safe, you know? Then I could for certain say I did everything I could and the issue is with the other person. But when he says it’s just because he has a wandering eye then…I feel like an idiot because I basically walked into this situation, you know?” You explained to him.
“If he has a wandering eye he would’ve found any number of reasons to cheat, love. People like that always have an excuse and always find a way to shift blame. There is nothing you can or could’ve done better because it’s all in Cal’s hands. It always has been. His inability to have some respect for his wife and marriage and his lack of some basic self-control are his issues alone. S’got absolutely nothing to do with you, so get that out of your head. It’s absolute garbage.” He said with conviction and you bit your lip and nodded. Harry was right, these things were Cal’s issues alone and you were not interested in continuing to take any fault for him.
“You’re right. So right…” you hummed, “Well, I’ll leave you to get changed.” You said and he nodded as you closed the door behind yourself and headed back down stairs.
**********
The night had been fun so far. Your pizza was good and you both had a couple of cocktails as you watched bake off, shouting at the TV screen as if you were watching the Super Bowl.
“If Janusz get’s kicked off I will throw a fit.” Harry mumbled, before letting out a shaky breath.
“His ice cream is not going to set in time…” you said with fear and just moments later you were both groaning as he served up his technical dessert. It was a completely melted mess. 
“Alright, he’s still got the show stopper to get back on his game.” Harry said and you hummed in agreement. Completely entranced as you watched the show stoppers until they were presenting it to the judges.
“Sandro’s got to take star baker.” You hummed.
“Yeah, he was basically smashing it the whole time.” He hummed in agreement. Moments later they announced Syabira as star baker. “What?! No!”
“No! Boo!” You both griped, “Her first custard was completely liquid!”
“And she failed the technical! It was absolute shit!” He added with gustó and you giggled a bit. “Sandro was robbed…” Harry shook his head. And then you watched as they let Kevin go with small frowns.
“I’m about to cry…God.” You muttered and he chuckled and pulled you into his side. You smiled as you rested your head against his shoulder and then you cuddled a bit closer.
“Go on and get comfy then.” Harry said softly and you smiled as you just had him lay down so that you could lay over his chest. The next episode came on and you both watched it quietly like this for a bit.
“Harry?” You spoke tentatively.
“Hmmm?”
“I really like you.” You said softly. His heart started pounding hard at your confession.
“I really like you too.” He said as his hand ran up and down your back soothingly. “Literally think about you every day.” He confessed. You pressed yourself up a bit and smiled at him.
“Yeah?”
“Yeah!” He chuckled through his confirmation, “Wanted to talk to you a bit more but I figured you just needed some space to get everything sorted out.”
“Well thank you for considering that but ummm…you can talk to me whenever you want. Just throwing that out there.” You said with a grin and he chuckled.
“Noted.”
“Can I kiss you?” You asked and he smiled.
“Yes. Please.” He barely got the words out before you were connecting your lips to his. 
You had no idea how, but just being around him made you feel like you were on fire. Your lips moved eagerly with his and you melted against him at the feeling of his big, warm hands siding down to your waist and pressing your body even closer against his. Your neck was growing a bit sore from your position so you decided to straddle his lap before connecting your lips to his again. The soft, wet smacks of your kisses made your tummy tingle. You reached one of your hands to his, guiding it down your backside. Harry was quick to take the hint and grabbed handfuls of your bottom before guiding you to rut against his lap. You could feel the bulge of his cock growing through the sweatpants he had on and you shifted on his lap, feeling his fingers dig into your bottom. It made you grin into the kiss and your eyes flickered open as you slightly pulled back. Harry opened his eyes and looked at you before glancing down to your lips, he started reaching to kiss you again, but you slightly pulled back with a teasing smirk and he smiled.
“Please.” He whispered.
“Please what?” You questioned innocently.
“Please kiss me.” He clarified and you lowered yourself back down only to skim your nose along his before kissing the corner of his mouth and he chuckled as he dug his fingers further into your bottom, “Please.” He requested again. It was making you excited, hearing him beg for you, “Please, baby.” He whispered.
  The impatience in his eyes was feeding a part of you that had been starved for so long. Your eyes were swimming with a dark need and every part of you just wanted to blow his mind and have him so horny and needy for you that he kept begging and begging for more of you. You wanted him to keep thinking about you nonstop, you wanted to make him feel so fucking good. Take such good care of him like he always did to you. You grabbed the side of his face gently with your right hand and he leaned into your touch as his eyes fluttered closed.
“Look at me.” You whispered and his eyes slowly blinked open to meet yours. They were also dark with lust and glanced down to your mouth again. You ground yourself against his clothed erection and you smirked as his eyes fluttered closed as a deep groan rumbled through him. “Gonna take such good care of you, Harry. I’m gonna make you feel so good, just how you make me feel good.” You whispered. “Want you t’do whatever you want to me when you feel it, OK?” You requested softly and he nodded.
“Yeah, baby.” He assured, “We’ll feel it out together, yeah?”
“Yeah.” You smiled before kissing him again. You suddenly sucked on his bottom lip before sinking your teeth into it and tugging it back. Your eyes met his and they followed yours until you were kissing his chin and then up his jaw. Harry extended his neck and you smiled before kissing right under his jaw, gently sucking, latching your lips to his skin. 
“Harder.” He muttered and you sighed and sucked harder. His hands squeezed your butt until you let go. You kissed the bruised little patch and then sunk lower. You kissed over his bobbing Adam’s apple and then the base of his throat.
“Take off your shirt.” You hummed seductively and then pulled back. He sat up quickly and haphazardly tore off his shirt before dropping it on the ground. Upon seeing his exposed body again you lunged at him. He sniggered softly as you immediately felt up his abs. He may or may not have flexed a bit harder so that your fingers could really feel the dips of his well defined, washboard abs. Then your hands roamed up his chest. So broad and firm, you could practically grab a handful of him. You sunk lower yet again to kiss over his pecs. You scratched down his left pec as your tongue swirled over his right nipple. You felt him twitch beneath you as you nipped at it gently before you sunk even lower. You kissed each one of his abs and around his belly button before kissing down the trail of hair leading to his cock. You stopped at the elastic of his sweatpants. 
“Let’s get these off.” you said and he helped you tug them down along with his briefs. His thick, heavy cock sprung up quickly as soon as his briefs were down his thighs. You quickly got them down to his ankles and he sat up and kissed you as he toed them off. His hands held your face securely as he licked into your mouth. You moaned into his messy kiss and reached for his cock. He sighed in relief as you squeezed your palm around his tip. You felt his precum smearing against your skin and you rubbed it over him before making a fist around the head and stroking up and down slowly.  “You’re so fucking big.” You mumbled into his mouth.
“I know, but you still take it all the way don’t you?” He responded and you nodded.
“Yeah. Love how you feel inside.” You panted.
“Mmm…suck my cock.” He ordered and you pecked his lips before sinking again and not wasting any time to get him into your mouth. He moaned the second your were sucking on his tip. You were messy with it, letting yourself salivate at the taste of his skin on your tongue. You got a little bit greedy and sunk down halfway. After a few seconds there you sunk down all the way and he groaned and dug his fingers into your hair as his tip met with the back of your mouth.
“Fuck…oh fuck…” he exhaled with eyes squeezed shut. You breathed through your nose as you tried to get him down your throat and gagged and he pulled you up quickly. “Breathe, baby. Breathe and try again.” He hummed, “Fuck, please try again. Need to get down your little throat.”
You swallowed thickly before sinking back down, taking your time to get him in deeper. Then you felt him start thrusting up slowly while his hands guided your head over him. He was locked on his pace, which helped you know when to expect the nudge of his tip to the entrance of your throat.
“Doing so well for me. Gonna go a bit deeper now. Breathe f’me. Then let it out nice and slow.” He said and you did so and when you started to exhale he started pushing your head down even lower. You hummed around him and he moaned at the vibrations around his cock. You were dripping saliva but neither of you seemed to care. He starting thrusting up a bit faster, just nudging down your throat, “Fuck, that’s a good girl…” He groaned deeply, “Take my fucking cock. Take my cock down your throat.” He grunted as he fucked your mouth until you just couldn’t hold off anymore and choked around his cock. He pulled you up and panted hard as he gripped your hair hard in his fist. You swallowed hard and caught your breath before resting your head on his thigh and smiling up at him. He smiled down at you too and then bit his lip as he watched you sink down and lave at his balls. You were gentle as you sucked one in between your lips. “Shit…fuck th-that’s fucking good.” He moaned, pushing your face closer to his groin. You moaned before popping off and sucking the other one just the same until his legs were wriggling beneath you. “Fuck you’re gonna make me come…” he moaned and you quickly popped off and he was panting. “Shit.” He chuckled breathily and you hummed and kissed his thigh.
“Can I ride your cock?” You asked and he nodded.
“Yes. Please baby, ride my cock.” He begged. You knelt up and slid your shirt off before standing from the couch to get your shorts off. Harry sat upright but slouched against the couch. He wrapped a fist around his cock as he watched you undressing. “So fucking pretty.” He hummed and you smiled as you approached him and then knelt  over his lap.
“Ready?” You whispered and he nodded. He glanced down, holding his cock up at your entrance to let you lower yourself. You started to drop your hips, obsessing over the feeling of his cock sinking into your sopping pussy. You felt the pressure increasing against your entrance until it finally gave and he plunged deep into you. You both moaned in satisfaction as you relished in the feeling of his cock finally being inside of you. “Fuck you’re so deep.” You smiled against his lips and he hugged tight around your waist and pulled you down as he thrust up hard. You gasped as he reached new depths that made your thighs tremble because his tip was rubbing right into your spot. You were covered in goosebumps in seconds before an involuntary moan spilled out of your throat.
“Fuck…that’s it isn’t it, baby?” He hummed haughtily as he thrust up into it again.
“Yeah.” You whimpered, “Right there…please don’t stop!” You keened as your toes curled. You started to grind down against him going faster and faster until your were gasping and choking on a cry as your orgasm rolled through your body like a giant wave. You tingled and shivered and seemingly vibrated in ecstasy. You felt so secure as Harry hugged around you tight, continuing to move you over his cock, helping you ride out your orgasm. You started to ride him again, adding a little more bounce to your movement and he groaned and surged forward to latch his lips to your nipple. He sucked hard as you ground down against him.
“You’re so good.” He hummed before sucking it back in again. Your hands raked into his hair and he groaned as you tugged a bit roughly at the roots. “Fuck, you feel so good, baby.” He praised, “Can I take you to the bedroom?” He asked and you nodded.
“Yeah, let’s get up there.” You grinned and without regard for your clothes rushed from the TV room to the bedroom he'd be in. 
He followed you in, not really minding the door as he trailed behind you, hands on your hips. He turned you around when you got to the foot of the bed and he picked you up and tossed you up further onto the bed. You laughed as he clambered over you, kissing you as he parted your legs to fit himself between them. You bit your lip as he lined up to your entrance again and started to push inside. Your jaw dropped as you exhaled in relief at his girth stretching you and filling you up. Harry’s eyebrows were creased as he tried to keep it together and just held himself deep inside before drawing himself out. You whined at the lack of his intrusion and he grinned.
“Please, Harry. Please.” You whispered.
“Yeah, baby? Want my cock?” He teased and you nodded.
“Yeah, please. Need you back inside.” You keened and he prodded at your entrance, teasing you by just letting his tip push into you before he’d draw his hips back. You lifted yours up trying to chase after his cock, desperate to feel him back inside of your tight, hot walls. “Harry…” you whined, eyes locking on his and he chuckled at your desperation before just dipped back inside to the hilt. He rolled his hips into you and made your eyes roll back in pleasure. He immediately started to pick up his pace, the thwacking sound of his balls against your ass was making you feral. You were cursing and whimpering as his cock hit all of the right spots. You fit a hand between your bodies and rubbed at your clit in quick circles until your were struggling to breathe, body tensing up as your pleasure started to reach it’s peak.
“Fuck, you’re so close. I can feel it, you’re so fucking wet for me and squeezing so hard, baby.” Harry hummed with hunger as he maintained his thrusting pattern consistent. It was building you up, pushing you towards the edge with each one until you were trembling.
“Oh! I’m coming!” You cried out loudly as you rubbed your clit faster until you were withering around Harry’s cock. He moaned as he started thrusting harder and deeper into you. You winced with each merciless thrust to your poor, sensitive, dripping pussy.
“You OK? Want me to stop?” He asked and you quickly shook your head.
“Please no.” you whimpered and he chuckled lowly.
Should I keep going and flood your little pussy with my come?“ He panted.
“Yes please, I want it so bad.” You mewled and he groaned.
“Fuck…fuck, I’m right there…” he moaned before he choked out a groan and dropped his weight over you and he sunk as deep as possible, releasing his load deep inside of you. He was panting but found your mouth with his. Kissing you sloppily as he hummed in pleasure. He was tingling and you were loving the warmth and weight of his body over yours. “Fuck, I missed you.” He sighed in satisfaction and you smiled as you hugged around his back.
“I missed you too.” You hummed happily.
After lazing around for a bit Harry headed off to have a shower and you ended up telling Cece that you guys could just meet up for dinner and she was very supportive of that decision. You joined Harry in the shower and had another go in there before he ended up dragging you out and eating you out on the bed until you were seeing stars. Your chest even burned a bit from how shallow your breathing was.
“Fuck…oh my god…” you panted as Harry kissed his way up your body before reaching your lips and kissing you quickly, “Think we’ll need to sleep in my room, the bed’s all damp now.” You huffed.
“Do you mind?” He asked and you shook your head.
“Not at all.” You assured him.
After he got dressed you were both settling into your bed. He pulled you closer into his body, spooning you so that you were nice and snug against him.
“Thank you for coming over.” You hummed quietly and Harry smiled and hugged you just a bit tighter.
“There’s no where I’d rather be, baby.” He assured you. “The divorce is final in a few weeks right?”
“Mhmmm.” You confirmed.
“Can I take you out or is it too soon?” He asked quietly and you turned around.
“I’d love to go out with you.” You said, practically beaming from ear to ear.
“Oh great, I’ll plan something special for us soon. I’d say tomorrow, but tomorrow, we’re spending it in bed. Have to make up for lost time, so rest up.” He hummed before kissing you and you easily fell into it until he turned around and asked you to scratch his back and you talked quietly until you both dosed off. 
The next few days were absolute bliss with Harry. You got a peek of his domestic side and were absolutely obsessed with how sweet and thoughtful he was. Of course the reunion with Cece was as exciting as you’d imagined. There were tons of laughs and inside jokes now and of course, the promise that Harry would be around a lot more. He had made breakfast for you Sunday morning and then drove you around to do your errands for some events you had coming up in the next few weeks. You spent some time in the hot tub, mostly making out until you just needed to have a shower and have another good shag before bed. Your body was sore and tired, but you hadn’t felt so good in so long. Good in every sense of the word. You felt at ease around him and the evidence was in how you passed out on his chest as he played with your hair tenderly.
“Hey, baby.” Harry mumbled against your temple as you stirred a bit.
“Hmm?” You groaned groggily.
“Sorry it’s so early, but I’ve gotta go to work.” He said and you frowned, your weekend together had flown by.
“Right…Monday.” You huffed with dread and he chuckled.
“Yeah, love.” He said before kissing your forehead, your cheeks, and then you puckered your lips against his softly. “I have a dinner meeting tonight, but I can come again on Tuesday? Can even get off early, help you set up for that event for your client?” He offered and you nodded immediately and he chuckled. “Alright, baby.” 
“Drive safe.”
“I will. I’ll text you when I get to the office, OK?”
“OK.” You hummed, “I’ll walk you out?”
“S’alright.” He assured and you shook your head and sat up.
“I insist, baby.” You said and he smiled and gave you a second to stretch before you hurried down the stairs with him and out to the door.
“Miss you already!” He called out the window and you grinned and blew him a kiss before he drove off.
… SIX MONTHS LATER …
You and Harry had been seeing each other on the DL for four months now. He had asked you to be his girlfriend on new year’s eve and you’d been spending all of your free time together. Shortly after the divorce with Cal was finalized you guys were able to sell the house and you’d found somewhere else to live by then which was actually a bit close to Harry’s own place which was rather convenient as your relationship grew more and more serious. Personally, you were thriving and you were looking after yourself so much more than before. Harry was an incredible partner and you swore that everything you felt for him couldn’t fit inside of you in any way, it seemed to be overflowing and you were seriously considering telling him you loved him over your holiday in Italy.
Cal had been doing a bit better than before. Dani ended up asking to be transferred to the London branch of the company and had been there since January. Obviously, this completely devastated Caleb, but he seemed to also just focus on bettering himself. You didn’t really talk often after he told you Dani left, he wasn’t sure who to talk to it about, but you encouraged him to find a therapist to work on himself and he assured you he would try his best. He would reach out every now and again though, he was still feeling a bit lonely and you were itching to tell him that you and Harry were together. You hated feeling like you had to hide your happiness, but Harry had insisted on telling Cal himself before you went on your vacation. He said that at least this way you’d be gone long enough to give him time to get used to the idea without feeling like you guys were shoving your relationship in his face. You agree to let him do it in his own time, but also it would save you the difficult task of having to tell your ex-husband that you were in a relationship with his boss; you couldn’t see that conversation going well in any capacity.
Harry was also very happy with you. He loved to see you thriving and he was more than thrilled that he was playing such a pivotal role in your happiness. He feels that he had always been a pretty good partner, but with you it was just different. He lived for the times he made you smile. He was also very excited for your romantic Italian holiday, it was just three weeks away now. He had planned to stop in England for a few days on the way back so that you could meet his family, he just felt like he needed to make all of the right moves with you because he wanted you in his life forever if possible. 
He was currently typing away at his computer furiously, just trying to get everything settled before he left. Just then a few knocks on his door sounded.
“Hey Harry, you wanted to talk to me?” Caleb asked as he came into his office and Harry glanced up at Cal.
“Hey mate, yeah. Have a seat.” Harry instructed and soon Cal was settling into one of the seats in front of Harry’s desk.
“What can I do for you?” Caleb asked cheerfully.
“I’m going to be out of the country on holiday for a month in a few short weeks and I just wanted to touch base with you about some of the things I’d like you to be in charge of while I’m gone.”
“Yeah sure.”
“So I’d like you to head all of the client meetings for that time period. You’ve been doing so well with that, I trust you the most to make things work and to cut the best deals. There’s a particular client that I really want to land, I’ll email you all that information and my personal files on the client. Please look over it when you get a minute today and we can discuss some strategy tomorrow.”
“Perfect.”
“Additionally, you and Daria will be overseeing all operations in my absence. That being said, you’ll receive a bonus for all the extra work you put in for that month. I know it might make you have to shift your schedule somewhat so please just take note of any extra hours and I’ll will ensure you get some OT for those hours as well.”
“Not necessary, Harry but thank you.” Caleb nodded in agreement, “So where are you heading off to?” Cal asked and Harry bit his lip for a second. He knew you didn’t mind him telling Cal about your relationship, in fact he had been the one to ask if he could break it to Cal because of their overlapping professional relationship and well, now was the moment to do it. He had even tried to do it a bit sooner but when he’d seen it was a rough day for Caleb he’d put it off. But this needed to happen now.
“Italy.” He shared and Cal’s eyebrows arched up in surprise.
“Oh, nice! Y/N is going to Italy soon too. Not too sure of the dates but-”
“That’s actually another reason for why I wanted to talk to you.” He said and Cal looked at him expectantly, “I’m…with her. Y/N, she’s my girlfriend and we’re going on holiday together.” He said, just getting it out there and Cal’s eyebrows arched up even further.
“Oh…” was all he said and Harry nodded, waiting for his next response expectantly but he didn’t say much, just kind of looked at his desk.
“I wanted to tell you because well, we still work together. I know that your marriage ended not too long ago, but I just want you to know that whatever has gone on outside of work is not any of my business so long as you keep doing excellent work here. And I have certainly treated you as a great employee and friend to some extent and ummm, I hope that you will do the same for me now that I’m with Y/N. I guess, I'm just saying I hope this doesn’t impact our professional relationship.” Harry explained.
“When did this happen?” Cal asked, seemingly ignoring what Harry had just said.
“Officially, I asked her to be my girlfriend on new year’s. I think we’re getting serious now though.” Harry said.
“Already, huh?” He asked with a sad smile and Harry nodded.
“Yeah, I’m ummm…in love with her and I want to see this through.” Harry admitted to him and Caleb cleared his throat and nodded.
“Right. Well, thanks for telling me. I don’t love her anymore, but it’s just…a weird situation, you know? It’s fine though, I’m glad you’re happy with her.” 
“Of course. And well, Y/N wanted to tell you a bit sooner but I insisted I break the news to you since…we’re the ones who will continue to see each other day to day.”
“No, I get it. She’s…great and I mean, you’re lucky to have her in your life.” He said and Harry nodded.
“Thank you, I know.”
“What ummm…what brought you guys together?” He asked.
“I think the dinner at my place in September really sealed the deal. I mean, I thought she was beautiful and smart and just the way she helped Tamika and well, Dani…I just thought she was really great. Then ummm I went to check on her since I could tell she was…a bit sad about the way the night had gone for her and ummm…one thing led to another and…well…” he sighed and Cal looked surprised.
“Oh…”
“I’m really sorry.” Harry apologized because he had never meant to get in between you two. And though he had omitted your previous interactions, he felt that having sex with you while you were upset with Cal could make him think that Harry had something to do with you also being eager to get a divorce from him. 
“Well, it’s not like I didn’t deserve it.” He said and Harry frowned a bit, “Just…treat her right, yeah?”
“I will.” Harry smiled and Cal returned the gesture.
“And she’s happy?” He asked Harry who nodded.
“Yeah, very happy. She’s doing great.” Harry confirmed.
“Good.” He hummed.
Obviously, things were just a bit weird for the rest of the day but Harry felt nothing but relief knowing that he’d been able to finally tell Caleb about his relationship with you. He loved you, it had happened so quickly for him, but just getting to say that to someone had made it all the more real. For the rest of the day he felt this pressure over his chest, an anxious need to tell you exactly how he felt for you. He didn’t want it to go unsaid for a minute more.
And when he got to your apartment that night and heard some Frank Sinatra playing through the door he immediately smiled. He loved that he could see you whenever he wanted now, though that did nothing to get him to stop thinking about you all day every day.
“Baby, is that you?” You called out as soon as you heard the front door close with a heavy thud.
“Yeah!” He called back as he set his things down and slipped out of his shoes, “It smells amazing!”
“It’s a chickpea masala soup!” You announced and soon you felt Harry wrapping his arms around your waist.
“Hi, baby.” He greeted as he kissed the side of your head.
“Hi!” You greeted him happily and then spun around to grab his face, “A kiss please.”
“Another?” He grinned and you nodded, “Of course. Anything for m’girl.” He hummed happily and pressed his lips to yours. After a few distracting and wonderful moments of your lips together you parted and you reared back to look in his eyes, “Told Cal about us today.” He shared.
“Oh? How’d he take it?” You asked right away.
“Fine. He was just surprised.” Harry explained and you nodded.
“Good. So I can come visit you at work now.” You grinned.
“Course. I’ll always make time for you.” He hummed happily and you kissed him again, “Ummm, as I was talking to him I ummm realized something. Well not realized, because I’ve known but realized that I needed to do something about it. And I just really need to tell you that I…that I love you.” He said and your eyes softened as they met his.
“Do you really?” You asked with a little smile.
“Yeah, baby. You’re everything I didn’t know I was missing. The moment you came into my life it was changed, for the better, of course. And I don’t want to let another minute pass me by without telling you that despite all the time and hurt that we’ve endured, we met when we were supposed to and I can’t imagine my life without you in it. My whole heart is all yours, always.” He said sweetly and you pouted in endearment with a thumping heart at his confession.
“I love you too. With every piece of my heart and I don’t even want to think about life without you, H. Thank you for loving me.” You said and he chuckled as he kissed your forehead.
“No, thank you for making me feel whole. I’m so lucky to have met you, I’ll never ever get tired of showing you what you mean to me, baby.” He assured with a happy smile as your eyes teared up.
“Oh, I love you so much.” You sighed as you hugged him tight and he hummed happily.
“I love you.” He whispered happily.
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songforeddiemunson · 1 year
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Can you please do a Eddie X virgin reader where there has always been romance and they never acted on it until they confess when there watching a film and then a couple weeks after they make out then have soft sex
Thank you so much for the request!! I made some minor adjustments because that's just the route the narrative took me, but I hope you like it! I'm SO sorry this took so long, it's been a nutty few weeks.
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NEXT SUMMER
Eddie Munson x Fem!Virgin!Reader (description vague apart from AFAB for inclusivity)
Summary: Eddie meets a cousin of the Wheelers who is visiting for the summer, and falls head over heels. The problem is, she lives in Chicago, and needs to return in the fall. Can they handle it?
Warnings/Tropes: longing with a bit of angst, fluffy affection, romantic soft smut, mild language, aftercare, mostly this is just really sweet.
Word Count: 5517
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August 1990
You first caught Eddie’s eye on a late summer evening, standing under the twinkling lights of carnival rides at the county fair. It was the sort of cotton candy sky just moments before the sun dipped below the horizon, signaling the end of another august day. The droning cicadas were rapidly giving way to the cricket’s song, but all of those innocuous details faded away as Eddie watched you as you waited in line for the Scrambler, talking and laughing with your companion.
Eddie’s heart nearly leapt in his throat when he saw that the person you were speaking with was someone he actually knew. Nancy Wheeler! his brain screamed, and before he realized what he was doing, his feet were carrying him forward as if he was on autopilot, such was your magnetism.
Nancy caught sight of Eddie as he approached, and her face broke out into a broad grin. “Eddie!” she exclaimed with delight. “It’s so great to see you!” She hugged him as you stood by, a polite smile gracing your lips.
“Likewise, Wheeler,” Eddie replied fondly, and when his eyes slipped to you, your heart nearly ceased its rhythm. The breath was stolen from your lungs, and all you could do was stare wordlessly at the handsome man who evidently was a friend to Nancy.
Unbeknownst to you, Eddie was experiencing the same physical paralysis under your gaze.
“Eddie! You have to meet my little cousin!  She goes by Ivy, but her name is–”
“Oh my god,” you moaned, cutting Nancy off. Blood rushed to your cheeks in mortification.  “I am not little, I’m twenty years old now!’
Nancy giggled fondly. “Well sure, but you’ll always be little to me.”
You rolled your eyes. “I’m only two years younger than you, but whatever.”
Eddie laughed, and your cheeks pinkened even more. “It’s nice to meet you, Eddie,” you said. You struggled to meet his eyes; it was like staring at the sun.
“It’s good to meet you too Ivy, if– if you don’t mind me calling you that.”
You smiled and nodded enthusiastically. “Please do.”
And so you spent the rest of the evening with Eddie and Nancy, keeping things oh so casual but feeling like you might die every time he looked at you. You remained aloof because, after all, you didn’t even live in Hawkins, and eventually you’d have to return home to the city. 
When Eddie first learned that you would be returning to Chicago at the end of the summer, he was crestfallen but struggled to mask it.
“I’m sure Chicago is really cool,” he said with forced bravado. “Way cooler than boring old Hawkins.”
“Oh but I love coming here,” you breathed enthusiastically. “Chicago is cool and all, but this is so nice. I love smelling the mown grass, and being able to go to the drive-in movie theater, and all that great summertime stuff.” You gestured around you. “And the county fair! I love coming to the fair.”
Eddie smiled despite his growing sadness. “You make it sound pretty nice. But really it’s just cornfields…”
“...I love corn,” you countered.
“And strip malls…”
“.....strip malls always have video stores, and I love movies.” you said with a grin.
Nancy returned from buying a candy apple.
You pointed at her. “Candy apples! I can’t buy candy apples in Chicago.”
“Hmm?” she replied, confused, chewing. “I’m sure you can buy candle apples in Chicag–”
“Not from the fair though,” you interrupted. “They’re better from the fair.”
“Point taken,” Eddie said with a chuckle, holding up his hands in mock surrender.
“I do still want to jump in a creek though,” you said wistfully.
“Gross, no. There are leeches,” Nancy said.
“Not in creeks,” Eddie laughed. “Ponds, maybe. But creeks are fine.”
And so the evening wound down. You and Eddie went back and forth over the virtues of city vs country living, but Eddie had to admit, you did have a way of making Hawkins sound pretty great. When it was time to part ways, Eddie desperately wanted to kiss you, so much that his lips nearly burned from the need, but he refrained. What would a girl like you ever see in a guy like him?
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Two days later, on a late Sunday morning, where the summer sun shone relentlessly through a bluebird sky, Eddie picked up the phone and dialed the Wheeler’s number with a shaking hand.
Mike answered, sounding like he just woke up.
“Mehllo?” he mumbled by way of answer.
“Mike! It’s Eddie.”
“Munson?!” that seemed to wake him up. “Dude! It’s been forever!”
“Yeah man! How are you doing?”
“Oh things are good, I’m going off to college next month, and–”
“Is your cousin around? Ivy?” Eddie blurted anxiously, covering his face in embarrassment over the way he must have sounded. “Sorry man, it’s just that I need to ask her something. I would love to catch up with you though! Before you head to school; we should get together.”
“Yeah definitely,” Mike responded, unbothered. "We’ll catch up. I’ll go get Ivy….” 
Eddie heard the handset thump against whatever surface Mike set it upon, and heard him call your name. He faintly heard your voice respond, which made Eddie’s already hammering heart pick up its pace. More fumbling noises ended with a slightly breathless, “Hello? Eddie?”
“Hi Ivy,” he replied, and you thought maybe you could hear a smile in his voice. “Wanna go jump in a creek?”
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Your summertime in Hawkins was coming to a close; in only a few days’ time you were due to return to Chicago and university. As the final days ticked away, a ball of sadness gradually grew in the pit of your stomach. It was the best summer ever, and you were sorry to see its end.
Since the night you met him at the fair, Eddie had taken you cliff jumping into the Bear Creek, something that simultaneously terrified and thrilled you, leaving you more exhilarated than you have felt in a long while. But when you weren’t jumping, you simply floated in the water, watching the dappled sun dance across its surface, loving life.
Eddie also took you to the drive-in theater. It wasn’t a date, since he didn’t technically ask you out like that, and Nancy and Mike also insisted on tagging along. You lined camping chairs up in front of the van and rolled down the windows with the sound up loud so you could all sit together. It was a lovely, balmy night of watching Total Recall, and you ate too many skittles while swatting mosquitoes. It was perfect.
And now summer was ending and it was time to go, and you couldn’t possibly want to return to Chicago less. Why did you have to meet Eddie now?
You sighed as you packed up your things, folding clothes and setting them in your suitcase slowly, unmotivated. Nancy perched on the side of your bed, watching.
“You seem really bummed out,” Nancy remarked.
“I guess I’m not looking forward to going home. I wish I could stay a bit longer.” you replied, not bothering to hide your low mood.
“Would this have anything to do with a certain long-haired boy that lives on the other side of town?” Nancy prodded. It’s not like you were hiding anything.
“That obvious? And he’s twenty-four, he’s not a boy.”
Nancy nodded, with a giggle. “Fair enough.”
“And…maybe. I don’t know. It’s not like he’s kissed me or asked me out properly....” You stalled your packing, and you folded and unfolded the same sweater over and over while you let your thoughts wander.
“But you want him to?” Nancy prodded gently after a moment.
You sighed. “Yeah, I do. It’s kind of all I can think about actually,” you added with a wistful chuckle.  “But what’s the point when I live all the way in Chicago the other nine months of the year?” You flopped down dramatically on the bed with a huff.
“Maybe you can talk on the phone and stuff throughout the year, and pick up where you left off next summer?”
“Long distance?” You allowed a glimmer of hope to creep in. “Do you think that could work?”
Nancy shrugged. “I did it with Jonathan when he moved to California. It’s not easy, but it can work.”
You hitched a deep sigh. “What if he doesn’t want to?”
“There’s only one way to find out,” Nancy replied.
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The sky was overcast as you loaded the last of your bags into the back of the Wheeler’s car, matching your mood. You hugged Mike and Karen goodbye; Ted and Nancy were going to ride with you to the train station. You scanned the empty suburban streets for Eddie, but he was nowhere to be seen, causing your heart to sink even lower.
Just as you were about to climb into the backseat, you heard a sound that pulled your attention toward the woods at the edge of the neighborhood. There was some rustling and you saw that the flora was jostling about. What the–
Eddie suddenly materialized from the trees, calling, “Wait!” as he trotted over toward you. Your heart reversed its previous downward trajectory with haste, and happiness soared through you so abruptly and completely that you thought you might fall over.
“I cut through the woods,” Eddie stated breathlessly. “I was afraid I wouldn’t make it.”
“Just in time,” you grinned.
Ted poked his head out of the car’s driver window. “We’re going to be late if we don’t get going.”
“Oh– Okay, I won’t take long,” Eddie stammered slightly.  “I just wanted to say good bye and ask you…is it okay if I call you?”
You struggled to contain your delight at the suggestion. “Yes Eddie, I would really love that.” You pulled a small notepad from your purse, jotted your number down, and tore the scrap of paper out before handing it over. “Don’t lose this.”
Eddie had the fleeting thought that he would have your digits tattooed on his flesh to ensure their permanence. “Don’t worry, I won’t.”
Ted honked the horn, even though you were all standing right there.
“Okay, well I have to go. Call me tomorrow?”
Eddie nodded, his throat suddenly gone dry. “I will.”
As you sat down and closed the car door behind you, Ted wasted no time pulling away.  You twisted around in the seat to watch Eddie grow smaller as the distance increased. He raised a hand and waved shortly before you went around a bend, causing you to lose sight of him.
The temporary high of seeing Eddie was quickly supplanted by sadness. It was going to be a very long wait for next summer.
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June 1991
Once you were clear of the train platform, your rolling suitcase and duffle bag appropriately situated, you bolted through the crowd as quickly as possible.
Nine long months you waited. Nine months of speaking on the phone for hours nearly every night, talking about everything, watching movies together, helping Eddie write his next D&D campaign, discussing books. You shared hopes, dreams, wishes, and desires. Nine months of longing. Nine months of imagining his lips on yours, his fingers gripping the meat of your thighs, picturing him doing things to you that you’d never done with anyone before. You were tired of waiting.
You never officially declared yourselves to each other, still hadn’t even kissed, so you couldn’t be completely sure that he felt the same way. But you had a pretty good idea; after all, would a guy spend that much time on the phone with you if he didn’t feel some kind of way? He said he was going to pick you up at the train station after all, so that had to count for something.
You were determined. Eddie would not slip through your fingers; this summer was going to change everything.
And there he was. As you entered the terminal with the other passengers, you spotted him immediately.  He was leaning up against the wall, torn tight jeans and black band tee, long chestnut curls cascading around his shoulders. He was beautiful. 
The way his face lit up when he spotted you could probably heal the world, if you could find a way to harness it. 
You let your bags drop to the ground as you ran to him, and he opened his arms to you as you collided with him, slamming him back against the wall. His arms slid up around your back and gripped you tightly, his breath fanned across one ear, setting all your senses alight, and you simply resided in his embrace and felt the object of your affection absolutely envelop you. Oh how you had waited for this.
You pulled away just enough to look at his face. He was undeniably very happy, eyes bright, smiling broadly, his dimple making itself known.
“Hey you,” he said.
“Hi you,” you replied.
“I’ve missed you,” he said softly.
“I've been counting the minutes,” you said. You thought maybe you were going to cry.
“Try seconds,” he whispered, opening his eyes wide as if he was revealing a scandalous secret. 
The rest of the bustling train station faded away. The voices and echoes were reduced to a muffled din, and all the people who hastened past you became less corporeal. As your eyes roamed his face, it felt like you were the only two people in the world.
He blinked and pulled away, and as soon as it started, the spell was broken.
He hastened over to your bags and grabbed hold of them, slinging your duffel over his shoulder and taking your rollbag in one hand. “Let’s go,” he said with a look over his shoulder, his hair bouncing as he hurried through the terminal with you in tow.  He slowed as he approached the doors to outside. “Uh, I’ll take you to the Wheeler’s to settle in, but I wondered…” He paused, his expression belying his own lack of confidence. He looked almost shy.  “I got an apartment about a month back, finally…a space of my own,” he continued. “I wondered if maybe you wanted to watch a movie later?”
“Eddie!” you breathed, excited. “That’s so great! Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I wanted it to be a surprise,” he said with a small shrug. “No pressure, if you don’t want to. I just wanted to put it out there, no strings attached.”
“I would love to,” you beamed. 
“Do you want to know what movie I picked out?” Eddie asked.
“I really don’t care,” you replied, and you laughed together as you walked to the parking lot.
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You waited anxiously for Eddie’s arrival later that evening.
“It’s a daaaate!” Mike sang as if he was still fourteen and not a freshman in college. Nancy slapped him on the arm.
“Don’t tease,” she admonished, but there was a twinkle in her eye.
“It is not a date!” you countered as you checked your reflection for the thousandth time. “Doesn’t someone have to say it’s a date for it to actually be a date?”
Mike rolled his eyes. “Some things are just sort of….assumed.”
You and Nancy glared at him in tandem. “Uh, no thank you. Nobody should make assumptions about anything like that,” Nancy scolded.
You nodded in agreement. “Yeah I mean, what if he just thinks I’m a great friend, and I go and spoil everything going in there thinking this is a date?”
Mike gestured toward you as you touched up your lip gloss. “Says the chick who has been fussing over her appearance obsessively for the last 45 minutes.”
“I’m just being prepared,” you said.
“For what?” Nancy said with a chuckle.
“Just in case it is a date. I never said I didn’t want it to be.”
Nancy laughed as Mike groaned in exasperation. Fortunately, you were saved from further discussion by the doorbell. You ran from the room before anyone could stop you, grabbing your shoulder bag on the way. 
You opened the door and revealed a slightly nervous looking Eddie, and he nearly stole your breath away.
Eddie was resplendent in a blue and black plaid button-up shirt with his black jeans and black converse sneakers. He had clearly made an effort to tame his hair, and his waves were soft and tidy. His breath caught when he saw you.
“H– hi,” he said with a grin.
“Hi yourself,” you said. You chanced a look over your shoulder, fearful of an audience. “Okay let’s go before Mike and Nancy get weird and interrogate us,” you said, grabbing Eddie by the hand and making him laugh while shutting the door behind you.  Eddie held his van door open for you before walking around the other side and starting up the engine. Was that aftershave he was wearing?
Butterflies exploded in your chest. Oh my god, this is a date, you thought to yourself elatedly.
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Eddie’s place was nice, simple, and clean. He didn’t have much in the way of furniture or decor yet, but he had the basics, and it was all his.
You were halfway through Goodfellas– which was really good– and sipping on bud light bottles on opposite ends of the couch.  You were sitting with your legs curled underneath you, your left foot sticking out along the couch cushion.  Eddie reached over and gently laid a hand on your ankle, pulling your attention away from the film.
“I’m gonna grab another beer. You want anything?”
“Sure, you want me to pause it?”
“Nah, I’ve seen this twice already,” he said as he headed to the kitchen.
“Eddie!” you said, smiling. “Why didn’t you rent something you’ve never seen?”
“It doesn’t matter,” he called. “I love this movie.”
You picked up the remote and paused the film anyway.
“But it just came out on VHS!” you said, laughing. "How have you seen it multiple times already?"
He returned with two freshly opened beers and handed one to you. He sat down again, a little closer this time.
“What– you don’t watch movies over and over again every chance you get? Is that…like….not normal or something?” He smirked at his own sarcasm.
“Not that quickly I’m afraid,” you said, and he laughed out loud. 
“I guess I’m a bit of a fixator,” he said. “I fixate on things.”
“I suppose we all have things we fixate on,” you said.
“What do you fixate on?” He asked. He was leaning slightly in your direction. It made your heart speed up a little bit.
“Well lately,” you said, drawing out your syllables and pretending to think really hard about it. “Lately it’s been this guy.”
“Oooh,” Eddie said. “Tell me more.”
“Well, he looks a little rough around the edges, but it turns out that he’s the sweetest.”
“He is?” Eddie played along.
“Oh yes. And he has the biggest, most soulful brown eyes I’ve ever seen. It’s like he’s always seeing the world in new and interesting ways. And don’t get me started on his lips…”
“What about his lips?” Eddie asked.
“They’re so full and plump, like fruit, and I want to nibble on them.”
Eddie huffed a small laugh. “You want to nibble on his lips?”
“Among other things,” you said, a little breathily.
As your eyes flicked down to his lips, he licked them unconsciously, and you knew everything was about to change.
Eddie leaned forward, closing the distance between you, and he raised his right hand to cup the back of your head, pulling you forward. You felt his breath fan across your cheek as he rubbed his nose against yours.
“What other things did you have in mind?” he murmured.
“I want him,” you said simply. “But I don’t know how he feels.”
“Hmm,” Eddie cooed. “I think it’s safe to say he wants you too.”
“He does?”
“Oh yes,” he breathed, and then he kissed you.
Your breathing hitched– it was finally happening.
You enjoyed the simple feeling of his beautiful lips against yours for a moment before you parted your lips to deepen the kiss. You slotted his bottom lip between your teeth and applied gentle pressure. Eddie’s quiet gasp did things to you.
You chuckled, and rose up on your knees before pressing your body firmly against his, the movie now forgotten.
Eddie broke away, beaming. “I thought you probably felt the same way, but I wasn’t sure, and I was afraid to make a move and fuck it all up–”
“Shut up and keep kissing me,” you said.
He did as he was told. He also dialed up the passion, and you kissed each other hungrily, pouring nine months of longing into your efforts. Your tongues danced together, your hands roamed the expanse of his back, and you slid one hand up and under his shirt to feel his flesh.
Eddie gasped at your touch, and pulled away. His pupils were blown wide from the excitement, and you imagined that yours might look the same. He cupped the side of your face in his hands, boring his eyes into yours.
“Are we together? Are you mine?” he asked, and your heart broke and soared with equal measure at the sheer sweet earnestness of him.
“Yes, Eddie,” was all you could muster before he was kissing you again. He tipped you back and gently laid you down across the sofa, allowing his hand to travel up the length of your torso, keeping things chaste, but only barely.
You laid together and kissed deeply for a time, until you decided you’d had enough.
“Eddie,” you said.  “T– take me to bed.” 
“Are you sure? That’s really what you want?”
You nodded, but you couldn’t hide your nerves, and he gently pinched your chin to tilt your head up. “You seem anxious,” he said softly.
“Well, I – I haven’t actually done it before.” 
Eddie’s eyes widened slightly.
“I’ve done some stuff, a little hand stuff mostly, but never, uh– it. Sex. I’ve never had sex.”
Eddie smiled affectionately at your display of nerves. “Relax, babe. It’s okay. You don’t have to do anything you’re not ready to do.”
“But I am ready,” you said, more assuredly.  “I really want to do this with you. I want you to be my first.”
Eddie searched your face for any further signs of nervousness or unease, but all he saw in your eyes now was conviction and honestly. You reached up a hand and laid it on his cheek.
“Nine months I’ve waited for this. I knew a long time ago that you were the one, Eddie. I’ve waited long enough.’
Eddie nodded. “Okay,” he said softly.
He moved to stand and gently scooped you up in his arms, making you giggle, and he carried you over to the bedroom. He kicked the door open with his foot, making you laugh some more, and laid you on his bed, which was clean if unmade. He leaned down and braced himself on either side of your body to kiss you.
“If you want me to stop, just tell me,” he said between kisses, and then stood back up to pull his shirt over his head. He did it in one fluid motion, letting his soft curls dance across his shoulders and back, and he was a sight to behold. You’d seen him with no shirt on last summer when he took you swimming, but somehow this was different.
“May I?” he asked, and paused with his fingers above the fly of your denim shorts. You nodded, and let Eddie loosen the buttons before pulling your shorts down along your legs and tossing them aside.
You smiled up at him as he loosened his own jeans and pushed them down before stepping out of them, leaving him clad in nothing but his boxers. He returned to the bed and laid next to you, gently trailing one palm up your body and pushing up your shirt, resting it at the bottom of your ribcage just below the underwire of your bra. Eddie resumed kissing you; it was something you were quite sure you would never tire of. He was amazing.
After a beat he pulled away to look down at you. “I need to get you ready,” he said softly. “I don’t want it to hurt.”
“Okay Eddie,” you replied.  He pulled your shirt over your head gently, and then moved one hand to your back to unclasp your bra. 
“You seem to have some experience with this,” you said, feeling a stab of self-consciousness.
Eddie paused. “A little. I’m not a virgin, but I’m hardly a Casanova or anything…”
“It’s okay, I don’t need to know.” you looked away. 
Eddie was not pleased with the loss of eye-contact, and he could sense your discomfort. 
“Hey,” he said softly, turning your face to his. “It’s only been a couple different girls. I really haven’t had much action for a guy my age, trust me. And nothing serious, ever.” He kissed your forehead. “You’re special. I want this– I want it to be special.”
You relaxed and smiled. “Honestly, I’m fine.”
“You’re sure?”
“Completely.”
“Okay then.”
He pulled your loosened bra off, leaving you in only your knickers. “If you want me to stop, just tell me.”
Your answering smile was cut short as he bent and placed a kiss on your nipple. “You’re beautiful,” he murmured, before he sucked the little bud between his lips, setting all your senses alight. 
“Oh–that feels nice.” you sighed.
As Eddie suckled you, he slowly trailed his hand down the length of your torso, leaving goosebumps in its wake. He paused at the elastic of your underwear, slipping one finger just under the thin white band, but continued no further. 
“You can– ah– you can touch me Eddie,” you managed between gasps.
With no further preamble, he slowly slid his hand into the delicate cotton, and his fingers found your heat. He removed his mouth from your nipple, leaving it feeling cool and bereft, before kissing you lasciviously as he slowly pushed a finger inside of you. You gasped, but as quickly as he had entered, he was gone again. He dipped in smoothly a second time, but then turned his attention to your clit, applying gentle pressure and circling it with his moistened finger.
You arched your back and moaned at the sensation. Your senses were heightened, your heart was racing, and you couldn’t believe that you were here, with Eddie, after all this time. You were delighted; you’d waited so long for this, and you were going to enjoy it.
Eddie slowly picked up the pace and pressure of his ministrations. You felt as if all the blood in your body was rushing to the space between your legs, and your body began to tremble. It felt good– damn good. You could hear the wet sounds of your arousal as his fingers picked up speed, and then, without warning, he slid one back inside of you. You moaned as he pumped you with one finger, sliding out, stroking the sensitive button of nerves, pushing back in. You were teetering on the edge of climax when, suddenly, he stopped. 
“Wha–” you said blearily, as Eddie padded over to his nightstand. 
“I’m just grabbing a rubber babe,” Eddie smiled, as he pulled open the drawer and held up a foil square.
“Ah, right.”
“Just want to be careful, ya know?” 
“Of course.”
Eddie paused to look at you, his face painted with adoration and concern. “You sure you’re still okay with this?”
You nodded emphatically. “Yeah, yes.”
Eddie looked angelic. Flushed with desire, his hair slightly mussed, lips reddened from kissing, his boxers tented by his arousal. He walked around the bed to stand at the end, and he gently pulled your underwear off, leaving you fully exposed for the first time. You had to fight to resist the urge to curl into yourself protectively. You weren’t the only naked one for long, however, as Eddie pushed his boxers down, and you were able to see all of him for the first time.
He was beautiful. He was perfect.
He deftly rolled the rubber along his length before he laid down next to you, and let his fingers return to your heat. He leaned down and kissed your neck while he worked you open, this time with two fingers. He slid them inside as he kissed your lips and licked into your mouth, and then he gently climbed on top, allowing you to rest your calves around his hips.
You felt his tip prod your entrance.
“Are you ready?” he breathed into your ear.
“Yes,” you said, and he captured your earlobe with his teeth as he slowly started to push in.
“Ah– fuck,” you cried softly. It felt like white fire had ignited where you were joined and traveled up your body, settling behind your eyes, and a kaleidoscope of sparks clouded your vision. You squeezed your eyes shut and ground your teeth together as you moaned through the sensation. It hurt, but it was a sort of pain you’d never felt before.
“God, babe,” Eddie gasped as another shallow, gentle thrust pulled him deeper. “This okay?”
It wasn’t okay exactly, it stung like hell, but it was okay because this was Eddie, and there was nobody else on the planet you were willing to experience this with.
“Uhhuh, yeah,” you panted. “I’m okay.”
Eddie sat back on his heels and grasped your thighs with his hands, pulling you flush against him and seating himself fully inside of you. His eyes met yours and he smiled at you adoringly as he began to move.
You moaned in sweet agony as each thrust ignited new fires within you, but before you realized what was happening, the pain began to give way to intense pleasure. Your gasps of pain grew to cries of ecstasy, and Eddie could feel you yield to him, could feel the resistance temper, and he delighted in watching the change come over you. White fire was replaced by pure bliss.
He lifted your legs to rest your ankles on his shoulders, and picked up his pace. 
Eddie hugged your legs to his chest as he pumped, every thrust hitting deep, the mingled gasps and cries of your lovemaking growing in volume and timbre. You reached out a hand to touch his chest, but he was too far away. Eddie noticed this, and he released your legs to lean forward, bracing himself with his hands on either side of your shoulders, and he kissed you. It was damn hot, the passion of it all, making out so intensely that your teeth clattered together as he fucked you, all of your senses heightened and electrified.
You scratched at his back as your felt your climax building, causing his own pace to falter. Your cries of delight as you came caused his own orgasm to crash into him suddenly, and you both moaned as you rode it out together.
And then all was still.
You breathed together as you came down from the intense sensations you had just experienced, and you could feel Eddie’s heart beating in its cage, his chest pressed against yours. He could feel yours too.
After a moment, he got up, discarded the used condom, and slipped on his boxers, smiling down at your prone, naked body as he did so. “Was that okay? It didn’t hurt too much?”
You thought for a second. “It did hurt at first, that probably can’t be helped. But after a little while, it felt really good. Was I– was I any good?”
Eddie beamed. “Oh babe. You don’t have to ever worry about that. It was incredible.”  He headed to the bathroom, and returned shortly with a damp washcloth. He sat beside you and gently tended to your sore, sensitive area. The cool terrycloth was soothing, and he peppered your face with kisses, making you giggle. He tossed the washcloth aside and laid down with you, wrapping his arms around you to hold you close.
“Do you want to stay here with me? You can, if you want,” Eddie murmured into your hair. He sounded sleepy.
“Eddie, I want to be wherever you are,” you replied. You were feeling quite drowsy yourself.
“I don’t want the Wheelers to think I kidnapped you,” he said with a small chuckle.
“They know where I am, and we’re all adults, so I’m staying put.”
Eddie grinned. You had no way of knowing what was happening in his heart, but he wished he could transfer part of his joy to you, so you could feel even a fraction of his elation.
Eddie had no way of knowing that you were feeling exactly the same way. He also had no way of knowing that you were planning to transfer to Indiana State in the fall. In time, you would share your hearts fully with each other, but for the moment, you enjoyed just laying in his arms, and drifting off into blissful slumber.
Together. ♥
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MASTERLIST
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ssoulphrase · 1 month
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00. The Curiosity of Haku Shota
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Pairing: alien!soul x fem!reader
Genre: Slice of life, fluff
Warnings: mentions of bugs (´-`)
Word Count: 2,159
👾 - I decided to write a small piece as a filler for the actual fic I'm writing with this concept. I realized it was gonna take me longer than I wanted, so l'm writing this to get me motivated T^T I wanted my debut to be the longer fic but oh well :) This can be read as a stand alone as it doesn't add much to the main plot :) The main fic wil be linked once it's finished!
Sorry in advance if there's any mistakes,l wrote this kinda fast ( ´~`)
⋆.˚𖦹⋆✮⋆.˚
💿 - Aya Hirano, Super Driver !!
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“Y/n! Come on! Wake up! Don’t waste your summer lying around all day! I wanna do stuff!!”
Ugh…
It’s been a couple of months since Soul crashed into your apartment, him first arriving at the time when you were still in classes. He’s become accustomed to your way of life quickly, seamlessly blending into what is human society. However, it's now summer, and he’s been begging every day to do something new, saying that it’s all for his ‘research.’ You laid on your carpeted floor, limbs sprawled out in a starfish shape as the cheap fan you bought at a market once was blasting at full speed, squeaking as it does its turns.
“What is it that you want to do Soul…?” The grogginess in your voice made it evident that you had no intention of getting up at any moment. However, Soul continued on, ignoring your groggy state.
“I want to go on a bike ride! Oh! And have a picnic! And draw with chalk! And maybe go star gazing at night!”
“That’s quite the list you’ve got there…” Although these were pretty mundane things to you, you couldn’t help but entertain Soul and his shenanigans, his excitement lifting a small smile upon your lips.
“I know! I thought about it all last night! It's stuff I've heard humans do during their free time.” A proud grin made itself onto his lips.
“Okay,” you chuckled fondly, “come help me make some sandwiches then.” It was just like Soul to drag you out of your apartment to do something. Just yesterday, the two of you had gone bug catching, Soul having the brilliant idea to make it a contest to see who could catch the most. It was no surprise to see that he had caught more than you by the end of it, boasting about having done his research on the most efficient way humans catch bugs. Of course, you didn’t let him keep any of the bugs he caught as you didn’t want any crawling around in your apartment. He dejectedly let the bugs go, seeing them fly out into the horizon. You couldn’t lie though, the scenery was beautiful (minus the flapping of the bugs…), the sun was starting to set just beyond the horizon and if it wasn’t for Soul, you would have spent this summer alone in your apartment.
“You, know they might return the favor one day, since you were so kind to let them go.” You glanced to your side, Soul was staring at the sunset in awe as all the little bugs he caught flew away.
“Return the favor?” He ripped his eyes from the sight in front of him to look at you in confusion. You couldn’t help but admire how ethereal he looked under the sun’s rays, his sun kissed skin and deep brown eyes reflected the sun’s true colors as the bit of breeze that picked up swept his hair, his eyebrows furrowed deeply.
“C’mon,” you chuckled, “Let’s go back home.”
Cut back to now, you lazily got up off your carpeted floor, already missing the fan’s cool breeze against your face
“What type of sandwiches are we making??” Soul excitedly followed behind you as you slowly made your way into your cramped kitchen.
“I guess whatever we find in the fridge…” Luckily, you did have the correct ingredients to make sandwiches, having bought the stuff a couple of weeks ago. You spent the next thirty minutes teaching Soul how to make a simple ham and cheese sandwich, not because of his lack of experience but because of your lack of ingredients (which he didn’t seem to mind), his excitement over making sandwiches made the chore a bit more bearable.
⋆⭒˚.⋆🪐 ⋆⭒˚.⋆
“C’mon! Hurry up! I wanna get to the park already!”
“I’m coming…” Soul had already reached the end of the steps, waiting beside your baby blue bike that you had gotten for your birthday. He had already placed the basket of food onto the bike’s built in basket, hands on his hips as he waited for you to ascend the stairs.
“You know, we’re gonna have to pass by the store to get the chalk you wanted, cuz I certainly don’t have any…” You finally reached the end of the stairs, Soul’s frown turning into a smile.
“I’ve got that settled already!”
There’s that proud smile again…
“What? How?”
“Your neighbor! I had mentioned it a while ago to her while you were out shopping, and she let me borrow some as long as we bring them back!” Soul boasted, you could only let out a sigh in response.
“So you had this all planned, huh? C’mon, get on the back of the bike.” Soul eagerly made his way on the back of your bike, holding onto your waist for security. The bike ride to the park was surprisingly peaceful. You half expected Soul to ask you about every little thing he saw on the way. Instead, he sat quietly behind you, squeezing you once in a while to hold on when the tighter turns came.
Soul honestly just liked being in your presence. He knew that asking you many questions tired you out, having once realizing that when your tone of voice turned into something less friendly by what seemed like his 500th question that day. Soul once again hugged you tighter, feeling only grateful for all you’ve done for him since he got there, a feeling he doesn’t experience often. Sure, he’s always experienced excitement ever since he arrived on Earth, especially when you comply to his wishes, however, sometimes he feels this inexplicable feeling in his chest whenever he’s close to you, almost as if he’s out of breath. He wonders if you’ve ever felt that before.
He might have to do some research on that later.
“Soul, we’re here.” Your voice broke through his thoughts as he eagerly jumped off your bike as you went to park it. While he was running off to who knows where, you looked for a good place under the shade to set the quilted picnic blanket you brought.
“Y/n! Come! What’s that vehicle over there???” You looked to what seemed to be an ice cream truck, you knew what he was going to ask once you told him, however, a good ice cream cone would be wonderful in this hot weather.
“It’s a truck that sells ice cream. You want some?” You weren’t surprised when he eagerly nodded his head yes, running over to stand behind all the other children who were begging their parents to get them ice cream.
“Do you know what flavor you want?” Once you caught up to him, you looked over the poster plastered onto the side of the truck, skimming through all the flavors they had.
“I’ll try what you have, I’m not particularly interested in any one of them. If I could, I'd try them all…”
Of course you would…
“Hmm, should we try the strawberry then?”
“Sure!”
The two of you had what seemed to be a feast for the both of you as you gobbled up every piece of food you had brought plus the ice cream, Soul seeming to be the one enjoying it the most. After the meal however, Soul ran off to chase some bugs again while you stayed seated in your spot on the blanket under the shade, having had enough of the ‘creepy crawlies’ since your small excursion the day before. Without noticing, an affectionate gaze landed upon your features as you looked over Soul who was carefully examining the grass beneath the (already) dirty sneakers you let him borrow. You couldn’t help but build a sense of endearment towards the alien that appeared in your apartment unannounced. It was only natural, right? You had spent several months together by now, Soul accompanying you through almost everything. You’d feel a little strange if he wasn’t there by your side bugging you about every ‘cool’ thing he saw. You wondered how you’d feel once his research period was over and he’d have to go back home.
“Y/n!”
There he goes calling my name again…
“Yes Soul?”
“Let’s go draw with the chalk!” He was already running off again, expecting you to be able to catch up to his speed. He led you towards the pavement pathway where previous chalk drawings were, some already being washed out due to age.
“What are you planning to draw?” Soul handed you a few chalk pieces before going a few squares away from you.
“It’s a secret!” You playfully rolled your eyes at his childlike nature, his nose scrunched as he turned away to scribble. You drifted your sight to the empty pavement square beneath you, sighing.
Guess I’ve gotta draw something…
Your artistic skills weren’t the best per se, but you couldn’t help but feel a little proud of the cute but childlike drawing made out of the pastel chalk colors Soul had handed you. You were so engaged in your drawing, however, that you didn’t see or hear Soul walking behind you.
“That’s your drawing?” Soul’s soft but snarky voice came from behind you, eliciting another eye roll from you.
“Oh, come on! Show me yours then!” You stomped your way to his square on the pavement, a series of squiggles and lines as well as intricate shapes were drawn with the chalk.
“Uh, what’s that?”
“It’s the writing system we use in space! I was hoping that if I write it big enough, my friends and family up there will be able to see it!” He wore that proud grin once more, showing off his penmanship in his language.
“Oh! What does it say then?” You stepped closer to examine his work, intrigued by the intricate work that went into the writing.
“Um, just letting them know that I’m doing okay,” his right hand went to rub his chin in thought, “I wonder if I wrote it big enough though…”
“I’m sure they’ll see it,” you reassured him, “They’ll be happy to hear that you’re doing well.” You tried giving him a reassuring smile to ease the worry that was present on his face, his eyebrows furrowed deep in thought.
“You really think so? Okay then!” In the blink of an eye, his worrisome expression changed to his usual carefree smile that he carries.
That was fast…
“Y/n! Let’s go draw something together over there!” And once again, Soul was dragging you to another place to draw. You spent the rest of the afternoon drawing on the pavement with Soul, him claiming that this has to be the ‘best drawing to ever exist,’ meaning that he wanted to put in the extra time to perfect it as much as possible. What he wanted to execute though, was a ‘family portrait’ of you and him so that his family and friends in space would be able to see what he was up to. And as always, you obliged to his demands, putting in the extra elbow grease to draw it as he imagined it. As a finishing touch, Soul added the orange, tabby cat that hung out on your balcony at random times, Soul claiming that they’re best friends.
“Perfect! We’re done!” Soul looked over the drawing with pride, the sun had already set and the stars were starting to twinkle brightly.
“Is this what you wanted?”
“Oh definitely!” he nodded eagerly “And we finished just in time to go stargazing!” Before you could say anything, Soul grabbed your hand to lead you to the picnic blanket under the tree, this time, a bit more calmer.
“Why’d you wanna stargaze anyway? I thought you lived amongst the stars based on what you’ve told me.” You sat down one last time on the blanket right next to him, Soul immediately laying his head right on your lap, your hand came up to rest on his multicolored hair.
“I wanted to see the stars with you.” The phrase touched you more than you thought it would, the meaning behind his words bringing a certain heavy feeling on your chest almost bringing you to tears.
“I promise I’ll keep in touch with you once my research period on Earth is over. You better keep in touch too!” You couldn’t see it, however you could almost sense that carefree grin he always carries forming on his face.
“Okay, I promise I’ll keep in touch too.”
I wouldn’t want to forget you…
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👾 - bleep blorp zeep zorp
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novasintheroom · 19 days
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066. Irritate
♡ Pairing - Vash x Reader
♡ Word count - 1.4k
♡ Warnings - Vash being annoying, he pinches your butt once
♡ Description: Vash is in a mood today, and you have to take the brunt of it.
Now part of the 150 Bullets drabble series on AO3
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Vash is in a mood today.
The others don’t see it. How could they? They’ve only known him for four months.
You, however, have almost seventy years of knowing him.
And you’re on your toes.
It starts in the morning when everyone is still waking up. The light of dawn is gray, casting silver sands across the horizon. Meryl and Millie are packing up their sleeping bags, while Wolfwood putters around with Vash, loading up the heavier equipment. Quiet chatter or grumbles is all anyone can muster.
You’re kicking sand over the ashes of last night’s fire when Vash comes up behind and wraps his arms around you, resting on your chest. “Hey,” he says. His voice has the croakiness of sleep still in it. He moves your hair to the side of your neck to press a chaste kiss at its base.
You warm at the affection and turn in his hold. You want a real kiss. Lips puckering, you whisper, “Hey,” and go on your tiptoes.
Instead of meeting lips, however, you feel Vash’s mouth close over your nose and blow. The air forces your voice to honk out in surprise, and Vash pulls away with a laugh. You give him a glare. He dances away before you can hit him.
That was innocent enough; he’s done that before. What really tips you off to his mood is when you’re walking through town later in the day.
It starts with one bullet casing in your pocket. Easy enough, you throw it away and continue with your group. But an hour later, you find another bullet casing in that same pocket. You look at it oddly, but again, chalk it up to nothing. Then another appears. And another. At one point, you pull your pockets out and five different bullet casings clink to the ground. The townspeople give you looks for littering their space with your junk. Embarrassed, you look to Vash for moral support. He looks away. You see the smile he’s trying to hide, though, and suddenly, you know it was him.
Little punk.
It escalates. When you go to hold his hand, he takes it and shakes it – every time – like you’re meeting for the first time. “Hello, miss, nice to meet you,” and “woah now, I don’t know you like that” are his go-to responses. He pinches your butt subtly when you’re in the middle of talking to someone, letting out a high squeak that makes the other person pause and look at you strangely. Vash also feigns a strange look, asking “Are you okay?” You can only give him another glare, the heat of the suns having nothing to the heat of your face. A hundred other little annoyances build up throughout the day, and by the end of it, you’re tired of his antics and avoid him like the plague.
The camp is set up in relative quiet. Millie’s talking about her family, with Meryl and Wolfwood halfway listening while getting dinner and a fire going. You’re trying to help, gathering sleeping bags and lean-to tents from the back of the car, when Vash comes up behind you and says, “Lemme take those.”
Your wary look has him acting innocent. “What?’
You slam the trunk closed and whirl on him, sleeping bags in hand. “Don’t ‘what’ me, what are you planning now?”
“I’m not planning anything – “
“Ha! Liar.” You hold the sleeping bags close like a shield. “Go away. Shoo. Go help Nico with the fire or something.”
He blinks. “But I want to help you!”
“Oh I bet you do.” Nose turning up, you march to the camp and start handing out everything.
Meryl gives you a strange look as she takes her bag. “Everything okay?”
You look at her, then roll your eyes. “Vash is Vash,” you simply say.
She nods like she understands. Millie frowns to the side. “Are you and Mister Vash fighting, Miss ______?”
A strange feeling settles in your stomach. The last thing you want is for them to think you’re actually fighting. “Nah,” you say, giving her a reassuring smile, “he’s just playing. He gets like this every once in a while.”
Light of understanding comes to her eyes. “Oh! My ma and pa do that! They’re always playing, poking fun at each other.” She shifts her legs to cross them. “Ma gets so annoyed at Pa, but they still love each other at the end of the day.”
“Yeah, that’s what we do.” You laugh, some of the tension of the day dropping off. Looking across the fire, you spot Vash setting up his own space for sleep tonight. You smile at him, and, when he notices, he smiles back.
Later, you’ve taken up a spot on top of the car. A small booksits on your chest as you read, curled up in a blanket, and stars glimmer overhead. Everything is cooling down, and with it, your temper.
The car shakes suddenly. You peak over your book and see Vash at the back end, climbing up the ladder. His eyes light on you, and your hackles rise. “What’cha doin’?”
You give him a look. “Reading…”
His smile is innocent to the unwary eye. You watch him carefully as climbs the rest of the way up. He shirks off his shoes and socks and coat and crawls under the blanket with you. He does not stop moving, flipping this way and that, bumping your elbows and squishing you further on top of the truck, bullying you into the side bar. You let out displeased grunts but try not to react.
When he finally settles, he’s got you pinned, rolled onto his side with an elbow supporting his head. “Hey,” he greets, and you see the mischief in his eyes.
The smile you give is tense. You only hum at him and pretend to go back to reading.
Slowly, he nestles down next to you. The blanket gets pulled up to his chin. He doesn’t give you any more room, but at least he isn’t doing anything. Your hackles settle after a few minutes, and you continue to read.
His legs shift. Then shift more. And more. His hand creeps out and takes a handful of your shirt. You shoot him a warning look. He blinks back. Then, in one swift motion, he lifts your shirt halfway and digs his feet into your side.
“Vash!” You shriek, and the others look over with wide eyes, “Your feet are freezing!” You squirm and kick to no avail; his blocks-of-ice-for-feet stay rooted to your ribs.
Vash laughs, smooshing his toes into your skin, ignoring the slaps you give his ankles. “Aw, c’mon, mayfly! It’s not that bad!” He hums and closes his eyes with a pleased look. “Nice and warm…”
You snarl and sit up, shoving his feet off you. “You’re such a boy! You irritate me! All day! Annoying little sh–”
 “That’s so mean…why would you say that…” He gives a kicked-puppy look, bottom lip wibbling.
You don’t fall for it. Grabbing his cheeks with one hand, you lean down and press your nose to his. “If you do not keep your filthy little ice nubs to yourself, I’ll throw you in the fire. That’ll warm you up.”
His eyes have a certain sparkle in them. Unrepentant, he gives you a quick peck on your lips. Ooo, he’s in such a mood. Your mouth twitches. He knows just what buttons to push to get a reaction out of you.
In the background, you hear the giggling of Millie, the long-suffering sigh of Meryl. Your cheeks heat, embarrassed. With your own feet, you push Vash away. He lets out an ‘oof’ as you push his stomach in, and he scrabbles against the luggage and roof of the car to stop this assault. “Why,” you say, “are you like this?!”
Still, he smiles. “Because I love you.” And with a great heave, he rolls over your feet and tackles you in a big hug, pinning your arms to the side to keep you from resisting. The air rushes out of your lungs in a wheeze. “My mayfly~” he sings, smooching your cheek.
“Get a room,” Wolfwood calls out.
“Isn’t it nice to see two people so in love, Meryl?” Millie sighs across the fire. “I wish I could find someone to be so comfortable around!”
When you have enough air, you reach around and bite Vash on the cheek. Hard.
Meryl smiles sympathetically amid Vash’s howl of pain. “I dunno if ‘comfortable’ is the right word for this situation, Millie.”
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blondeboyfriend · 1 year
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𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐒𝐄𝐓 𝐂𝐔𝐑𝐒𝐄𝐒 (𝟏𝟖+)
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𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐎𝐑𝐒 𝐃𝐍𝐈
[ PAIRING ] Vash the Stampede x f!reader x Millions Knives [ AUTHOR'S NOTE ] This is like an unholy mix of the manga and Stampede because I could not stick to one continuity. I took a big old shit on the timeline and decided to have Vash and Knives wander around No Man's Land together well into adulthood. Oh, and Vash still has his arm. [ SYNOPSIS ] After years of isolation two weary vagabonds turn your life upside down. [ WORD COUNT ] 8k [ CONTENT ] DARK CONTENT, canon AU, threesome (mmf), plantcest/incest, handjob, biting, nipple play, jealousy, dubcon, facesitting, oral sex (m + f receiving), degradation, humiliation, snowballing, everyone is emotionally damaged, everyone is HELLA dramatic, angst, voyeurism, exhibitionism, teasing, creampie, bittersweet ending.
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It was the tail end of a blisteringly hot day. You sat in a rickety wooden dining chair, its straight back forcing you to remain upright. It was impossible to relax, the chair causing moderate discomfort. Granted it beat sitting in the sweltering hell that was your home. Your porch always came in handy on hellacious days like this, ones where it felt time was moving slower than usual.
It was rare you ever saw another soul around these parts. You lived on the outskirts of a well off town with three plants. Your home was a comfortable distance from the feral hostility everyone seemed to exude there. You could go days without seeing someone. Occasionally a drunk would get lost and end up banging at your door, an issue you remedied with a rifle, but other than you led a rather lonesome existence.
That’s why it was such a shock to see two figures on the horizon. Initially you thought your eyes were playing a trick on you, that maybe your brain was so desperate for company that it conjured up these humanoid mirages. As they got closer you noticed they weren’t a trick of the eye.
You sprung out of your chair to get your rifle and a few rounds. The heat inside was oppressive; you felt like you were going to collapse under the weight of it. You grabbed what you needed and practically threw yourself out the door.
The figures were in plain view now. It was two men, their features mostly obscured by tattered cloaks. You loaded your rifle and pointed it at them, not wanting to take any chances. The likelihood of them being harbingers of devastation was too high. 
Once they were within earshot you called out, “Stay back! I don’t want any trouble!”
They stopped dead in their tracks. One of the men swayed and struggled to find his balance. The other quickly reached out, grabbing him by the waist. He continued making his way over to you, dragging the other man along with him.
You cleared your throat. “I’ll shoot if I have to!”
This didn’t seem to deter the conscious one. Your hands were clammy and starting to tremble. Usually threats were enough to ward strangers off. You’d never actually had to shoot anyone before.
“I—I mean it!” you shouted, trying to convince yourself.
You finally got a view of his face. He was pale, eyes a striking blue-green with long blonde lashes. They seemed to bore holes into your very being. It was an intensity that was frightening yet intriguing. In any other situation you would run inside and hope he wouldn’t breach the door, but you were stuck. Transfixed by his unflinching determination.
“I’m serious!”
You backed up, nearly tripping over yourself. Your rifle was loose in your grip. You felt small, vulnerable. You could picture your demise, your blood spilling and turning the sand around you a hideous red.
“Stop!” you shrieked.
The man winced.
“Stop screaming,” he replied gruffly.
“Stop coming closer then!”
The unconscious man was roused by your lively discussion.
“We don’t mean you any harm,” he said, slowly lifting his head.
His cloak no longer obscured his face. He looked exactly like the other one, but warmer. His skin was sun-kissed. His fluffy hair was golden blonde and cut close at the sides. His eyebrows were dark and his eyes a soft blue. He lacked the otherworldly nature of the other man. His presence was disarming, more human.
“We need he—”
“Don’t waste your energy,” the other replied.
“Then ask if we can stay already,” he laughed.
“Vash!”
“What? I’m tired. I’m hungry. My feet hurt. All I wanna do is sit down,” he whined.
You held your rifle by your side. The whiny one wasn’t looking too good. For all his warmness, he looked like he was being trailed by death.
“My brother… He needs help,” one said through gritted teeth.
“There’s a town not too far off from here. They got a doctor. I bet she could help your brother.”
“He might not make it,” he replied, tone growing more frustrated.
“That sounds like a personal problem.”
He stepped forward, dragging Vash along with him. Your feet were locked in place. The urge to run was strong, but where the fuck would even go? Running out into the dunes would be a death sentence. And quite frankly that sounded unappealing.
When he came to the front of  your porch he laid down his brother in the shade. He had lost consciousness again. He looked so frail on the ground, a pitiful existence. You made eye contact with the desperate man standing in front of you. He didn’t seem as intimidating up close, the worry in his eyes settling your nerves.
“Look at him.”
Vash’s breathing was labored, each inhale getting caught in his lungs. He did look terrible, but you weren’t sure what you could do other than give them a little water and send them on their way.
“Please,” he said, removing his cloak from his head. His hair was a pale ashy blonde, it almost seemed iridescent under the suns’ dying rays.
Vash snickered. “Di—did you just say please,” he said weakly.
“I’m doing this for you!”
The three of you went silent. The sky slowly turned from orange and pink to a muted purple.
“You guys can come in. It’s pretty stuffy inside though,” you said, gesturing towards your home. “I gotta open the windows… There should be a breeze coming through about now.”
“Thank you,” Vash said. He tried to stand, but couldn’t get up, his body too heavy for him to bear.
You hated to see anyone struggle and went to assist him. As you held out your hand, the other one slapped away your hand.
“Don’t touch him.”
“Nai, it’s alright,” Vash replied, taking your hand.
For someone looking so fragile, he was pretty heavy. You led him inside with Nai close behind.
“Sit here,” you said, guiding him to your plush sofa. It was the most luxurious thing you owned, a comfort you fought for at an illegal auction.
You went to open the windows, letting the cool breeze blow through the house. You lit your lanterns, filling your living room with a soft, yellow light.
“You can sit down too, y’know.”
Nai stood uncomfortably by the door.
“I’d rather not.”
“Suit yourself,” you said. You stood in front of him, wondering if he’d take a hint and move. “I need to get something from outside.”
He cocked an eyebrow.
“Beyond the door. The thing you’re blocking.”
He blushed and moved out of the way.
“Thank you,” you said, brushing past him.
There was nothing from outside you needed but they didn’t know that. Both suns had set below the horizon. The heat had tempered itself, now only a pleasant warmth paired with the cool breeze you longed for all day.
When you returned you found that Nai had finally made himself comfortable on the couch with Vash’s head in his lap. He was stroking his hair, a look of pure worry on his face. It contorted into disdain the second he registered your presence.
You passed by them briskly, pretending you had grabbed something. While in the kitchen you filled two glasses with water.
“Here,” you said, handing Vash a glass.
He eagerly took it and drank it all in one gulp. He let out a sigh of relief, one that softened your heart. You attempted to hand one to Nai but he recoiled.
“You sure?”
“I don’t need it.”
Vash grabbed the second glass from your hand without any hesitation and slammed the contents. His relieved smile had awakened something in you, a need to baby him, to take care of him.
“Do you have any food?” he asked, eyes sparkling.
You nodded and fetched some bread and dried worm meat. It was the only food you were willing to part with. Vash didn’t seem to mind, his face a pinnacle of gratefulness. It was refreshing. Such softness was hard to come by in No Man’s Land.
“Thank you,” he said with a mouthful of food.
You took a seat on the floor, keeping a safe distance from them. Vash seemed sweet, but Nai’s hostility remained. It kept you on edge.
“There’s a hotel in town. You could probably get a ro—”
“No. I’d like to avoid other humans as much as possible.”
Humans. The way Nai said it made it seem like he was spitting out poison.
“You two on the run or something?”
“No,” Vash yawned. “Just lazy.”
“You’re not lazy. You’re weak,” Nai muttered.
Vash sighed and rested his head on Nai’s shoulder. “Would you mind if we stayed?”
Nai flared his nostrils and stared out one of the windows. It was probably against your better judgment to house them, but you felt compelled. It wasn’t as if you didn’t have space. You had a spare room, one with a small but comfortable bed. And it wasn’t as if you ever used it.
“No. There’s a room upstairs you can stay in. Only one bed though. Hope that’s not a problem.”
Nai got up, hoisting Vash to his feet.
“Uh, it’s the one on the left. It gets a lot of sun in the morning so you might wake up sweaty. The blankets aren’t that heavy though.”
Nai led Vash up the stairs. Vash turned his head, making eye contact with you. His eyes were kind and beautiful, like the midday sky. He gave you a smile.
“Thank you,” he said as he disappeared.
You sighed, wondering what you got yourself into. Maybe they would leave in the morning before you woke up, their presence a mere fever dream. There’d be no complaints from you. They were rather odd, their actions unpredictable. You did feel a twinge of affection for the pitiful one, but you told yourself it would fade as fast as it came.
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You woke up just before daybreak, stretching your arms above your head. Despite the circumstances you managed to sleep well. You assumed it was a good omen. It was rare you slept through the night without tossing and turning.
You made your way down the hall and heard muted voices coming from the spare room. Vash and Nai had stayed. Though maybe they were planning to leave once the suns breached the horizon.
The door was open enough for you to take a peek and maybe hear more of their conversation. You crept closer and shielded yourself behind it. You looked inside.
They were facing one another, wrapped up in each other’s arms. Their clothes were in little piles on the floor. Listening in on their conversation was the last thing on your mind. You couldn’t stop watching them. You assumed they were brothers because they looked nearly identical, but maybe that was a coincidence. Maybe they were lovers. You couldn’t think of any families that would lie in bed together completely nude. Let alone as tangled up as Vash and Nai were.
Just as you were about to sneak downstairs, your body betrayed you and you let out a bellowing sneeze.
“Shit,” you said, hauling ass downstairs.
You hoped neither had caught you spying. You usually weren’t that kind of person and you wished you could show them that. But pleading your case wouldn’t do you any good, and if you had any semblance of luck on your side, they would’ve thought you were just passing by innocently.
You paced around the kitchen. Your brain felt like it was on fire. They must have known you were there. They seemed perceptive enough. If they were wandering around the dunes, they must have sharpened instincts, better senses. How else would they have survived out there?
A distraction. That was what you needed. You open your cupboards and pulled out some of your more prized foods. A jar of fruit preserves, cinnamon bread, coffee, smoked meat from an animal you couldn’t remember, and a few peaches. It hurt to part with those. You had to talk to three different merchants before they’d even admit to having them. The townspeople were stingy when it came to anything that was fresh.
You set the table for three people even though you suspected Nai wouldn’t eat. You boiled some water, brewing some coffee once it reached the right temperature.
In the midst of your cooking you didn’t hear Vash and Nai come down the stairs. You were too caught up in licking peach juice off your knife.
“G’morning,” Vash said, yawning.
You looked over at them, your tongue still touching the blade. Nai looked at you wide-eyed, a blush blossoming on the apples of his cheeks. It was strange and endearing.
“Uh… hey,” you said, putting the knife down. “Food’s on the table.”
The two men took a seat. You set a plate down of sliced peaches and poured coffee into the mugs. When you went to serve Nai, he quickly covered the mug with his hand, letting a trickle of hot coffee coat his skin. His eye twitched briefly.
“Oops. My bad,” you said, using your sleeve to clean up the mess. It was an automatic response, one you immediately regretted.
Vash laughed with a mouthful of peaches. “Don’t apologize to him.”
“Don’t talk with your mouth full,” Nai hissed.
You didn’t like the tension that was building. When you went to change the subject Vash gave you a swift, hard kick to the leg.
“Ow! What is wrong with you?!”
Vash leaned across the table and grabbed your hand. “I’m sorry! I meant to kick him!”
You tried to ignore the throbbing pain in your leg by spreading preserves on a piece of bread, tears flooding your eyes. You shoved it in your mouth, hoping it would stop you from crying.
“I can’t believe you’d kick a poor, defenseless human,” Nai said with an impish smile.
“It wasn’t on purpose,” Vash said, glancing at Nai.
You swallowed and pulled your hand from his grasp.
“It’s fine,” you choked out. “I’m sturdy.”
“You could have fooled me.”
“Nai!” Vash chastised while he ate a spoonful of preserves. You wondered if he realized that was for the bread, or if he simply didn’t care.
The air in the room was thick, oppressively so.
“So how are you feeling?” you asked in an attempt to remedy that weight.
Vash plucked a peach slice off the plate. “Better, but I’m still pretty tired.” He shoved the peach slice into his mouth, muffling his voice. “If you need us to leave though, I get it.”
When you woke up this morning you hoped they would have disappeared into the night, but now you couldn’t bear sending them back out into the desert. It would be one thing if Vash was in good shape, but he still looked worn out.
“I don’t mind as long as you don’t kick me again.”
“Hm,” he said, stroking his chin as if deep in thought. “I don’t know if I can promise that.”
You pointed at the door. “Get out. Go die in the desert.”
“Make me.” He took a sip of coffee.
Nai stood up abruptly.
“I’ll be outside.”
“There’s not much to do out there… Actually there isn’t jackshit to do out there,” you said.
“I’ll figure something out,” he said gruffly.
He slammed the door as he made his dramatic exit.
“Don’t take it personally,” Vash said, eyeing the smoked meat you had put out.
“He’s your brother, right?” you asked.
He nodded.
“Ah, so you’re used to it then.”
“Yeah…” He looked outside the window. “He wasn’t always like that though.”
You didn’t know what to say so you opted to stay silent. You and Vash ate the rest of the food, not uttering a single word.
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The brothers ended up staying for another day, and another after that… and another after that. Nai would disappear into the desert during the day while Vash was essentially up your ass. He followed you around the house like a puppy. He would always offer to help when you’d be cleaning or doing maintenance. Initially you rebuked him, telling him he needed to rest. But after a while you opted to take him up on it. You couldn’t deny that it was nice to have an extra pair of hands, and someone to talk to. It wasn’t until you had company that you realized how much you hated being completely alone all the time.
“How often do you go into town?” Vash asked, sweeping your bedroom floor.
You tucked your sheets under your mattress. “I try to avoid it as much as possible… I only ever go there when I need food.”
“Like those peaches?” he asked, voice full of longing.
You laughed. “Yeah, like those peaches.”
As you were smoothing out your blanket, he came up behind you. His body was pressed up against your back.
“Do you have any more?”
His tone seemed flirtatious but you didn’t want to assume anything. Plus maybe he realized that peaches weren’t cheap and thought he needed to butter you up to score another.
“Hmm?” he asked, his face practically buried in your neck.
You sighed. “You’re lucky I like you. C’mon.”
You brushed him off and led him downstairs. The second you handed him a peach took a bite out of it. You had never noticed how sharp some of his teeth were. You watched him intently, unable to stop yourself. 
“I wonder what your brother is up to.” You didn’t actually care, but you needed to distract yourself.
Peach juice made it way down his hand all the way to his forearm. Without any hesitation, he lapped it up, staring deep into your eyes.
“He’s probably just wandering around,” he said before taking another bite.
“Really? I feel like that’d get old after a couple days,” you replied, trying to ignore the throbbing sensation between your legs.
He shrugged and licked the part of the peach he had just bit. If you didn’t know any better, you’d think he was doing it on purpose. You tried to act as unaffected as possible.
Thankfully Nai walked through the door, covered in sand and tracking it in the house. You groaned and contemplated why you even bothered cleaning.
“What happened to you?” Vash asked.
“Did you almost get swallowed by the sand pit?”
“... I might have.”
“Been there,” you said. “Want to eat a peach about it?”
“No.”
He looked less intimidating coated in rust-colored sand, more boyish. It was kind of cute.
“I’ll be upstairs,” he muttered.
He turned away, posture rounded, and made his way up the stairs. Vash frowned and followed him, leaving his half-eaten peach on the table. You snatched it and bit into it, savoring the juices. You thought about how it would feel to lick it off his chest. You felt feral as you devoured it.
Holding the peach pit in your hand was humiliating. You hated yourself for eating it. You wanted to stay in control and not lose yourself to your carnal urges. But Vash was making that increasingly difficult. You decided to sleep it off on the couch. A nap would do you some good.
When you woke up it was nighttime. Darkness had settled in your house. You carefully got up and lit a lantern. You had no concept of what time it was. All you knew was that you were still tired and you still couldn’t stop thinking about Vash eating that fucking peach. It haunted you. He must have known what he was doing. He could not be that naive, that innocent.
Your plan was to go straight to your bedroom, but the awful morning breath that had settled in your mouth was too much. Brushing your teeth was of the utmost importance. You hip checked the bathroom door only to find it occupied.
“Oh fuck!” you said, quickly shutting the door.
“Did you need something?” Vash asked.
You pressed your forehead against the door.
“I wanted to brush my teeth.”
“Well don’t be a stranger,” he laughed.
You let out a muted groan and opened the door. You kept your eyes on your sink, careful not to look over at Vash and Nai. You put your lantern down and brushed your teeth.
“Did you have a good nap?” Vash asked.
You spat into the sink. “I don’t know. I hate napping that long. Not seeing the suns set is—” You made the mistake of looking over at them and lost your train of thought. “... disorienting.”
They were in your tub. Vash sat on one side hugging his knees to his chest, taking up as little space as possible. Nai was on the other fully reclined with his brother in between his toned legs.
“That’s understandable. Hopefully you can sleep tonight,” he replied.
“I’ll be fucking miserable if I don’t.”
“Worst comes to worst you can always come hang out with us.”
Nai looked like someone stabbed him in the heart. He went to say something but shut his mouth, opting to toss his head back with his eyes closed. For once he decided to ignore the two of you instead of saying something hostile.
You felt like you were going crazy. You briefly looked at Nai’s cock. It was of average length, but definitely on the thicker side. It was framed by a patch of pale blonde pubic hair.
“Uh… Nai,” you said, trying to think of a reason to speak to him. “You okay after falling in the, uh, sand pit?”
“I’m fine.”
“That’s good…”
“Yeah,” he said. He opened his eyes and got out of the tub. Droplets of water traveled down his body, leaving a puddle on the floor. “Hand me a towel.”
“Say please at least,” Vash quipped, sinking deeper into the tub.
“It’s fine,” you laughed.
You grabbed a towel and tried to pass it off to Nai. The only problem was your hand refused to loosen its grip. Perhaps it was an unconscious effort to have an excuse to be so close to him. His impatience got the best of him and he pulled it away from you. He wrapped it around his waist and stomped away.
“Sorry about him,” Vash sighed.
“It’s fine,” you repeated.
“Why are you so far away? I don’t bite.” He sat back up. “Unless you want me to.”
“What?!”
“I’m kidding.”
You were incapable of speech.
“... Unless.”
Nothing but silence on your part.
He sighed. “You gotta gimme something to work with.”
You decided to give in, to embrace hedonism just once. “Okay. Sure.”
“Wait, really?”
“Yeah,” you said, pulling your pants off. “Fuck it.”
You took your shirt off and unhooked your bra letting it fall to your feet.
“Um. I didn't think you’d actually—” You took off your underwear. “—oh wow—I mean, shit. I’m ruining the moment,” he whined, holding his hand to his forehead like he had a headache.
You stepped into the tub and crawled on top of Vash, pressing your chest up against his. You were eternally thankful that the water was still warm. He ran his hands down your back, stopping at the small of it. Everything about the situation felt surreal. He was a stranger that you couldn’t get a full read on. Vash was friendly but still rather opaque, especially in regards to his brother. Anytime you asked about him Vash gave you bullshit answers that created more questions.
“Why doesn’t he ever eat?”
Vash nervously scratched the base of his skull. “He does! He, uh, eats bugs while he's out there.”
You knew damn well Nai wasn’t out in the desert, skulking around and eating bugs like a little creature.
But that didn’t matter. What mattered was how Vash’s lips felt brushing up against yours, how it felt when he held your bottom lip between his teeth. The world around you meant nothing. You were consumed by your lust, driven by your oppressive loneliness.
His kiss was hungry and needy. He kissed you like you could disappear at any moment. He held onto you tight, his fingers digging into your back. You cradled his face in your hands. His skin was so soft which was unusual. Most men that wandered the desert had leathery faces.
He broke the kiss, leaving a trail of them from your jaw bone down to your neck. You tangled your fingers in his damp blonde hair. He smelled like your soap with a strange musky, floral undercurrent.
You were feeling bold so you started stroking his semi-hard cock. He bit down on your neck, driving his teeth into your skin. You winced, but the pain was intoxicating. You gave his cock a squeeze before rubbing your thumb around his sensitive tip.
“You like that?” you purred.
“Uh-huh,” he said, planting a kiss on your chest.
He held one of your nipples between his teeth and began sucking on it. You kept stroking his cock which was now fully erect in your hand. The sensation of his tongue against your nipple felt incredible.  All the moans you had been holding back sprung forth. You tried to lock your jaw shut as he went back to toying with your nipples, pinching one between his fingers and the other between his lips.
You squeezed the length of his cock again. This and your moaning seemed to inspire something in him. The most heavenly moans erupted out of him. Your touch was becoming too distracting for him to do anything except buck his hips against your fist.
“What are you doing to him?”
Nai had returned and he looked absolutely disgusted.
“I don’t know. I don’t know. I don’t know,” you chanted like a prayer.
“It’s fine,” Vash said nervously. “I wanted it.”
You jumped out of the tub and grabbed a towel as fast as you could. You pushed past Nai and sprinted to your bedroom, slamming the door behind you.
You paced around your room, trying to process what had happened and what the potential consequences would be. But it’s a fruitless task. You were too frazzled and still in the throes of arousal. You took a deep breath and dried your body off. As you crawled into bed you thought about how it felt when Vash buried his teeth in your neck. You ran your fingers down your folds, coating them with your fluids. You rubbed your clit, desperate to come. You covered your mouth to quiet your moans as your body writhed in pleasure. Once your body had calmed itself you drifted off to sleep.
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The next morning you were startled awake by a series of knocks on your door. You stumbled out of bed and threw on a nightgown. You opened the door only to be greeted by Nai’s overwhelming presence.
“We need to talk.”
“We—we actually don't, which is the great thing.”
He stepped inside, shutting the door behind him. He was gradually invading your space, leaving almost no room between the two of you.
“Was that the first time you defiled my brother?”
“What?”
He grabbed you by the chin. “I said, was that the first time you de—”
“Yes!”
He gritted his teeth. “The last thing he needs is one you clinging to him.”
You were like an animal with its foot caught in a trap, too scared to do anything. He seemed so incensed. You didn’t know what he was capable of, how far his anger would go. He could kill you with his bare hands with ease, a fact that was equally terrifying and riveting.
“I’m sorry.”
He got closer to your face. “You’re sorry?”
“I shouldn’t…” You were at a loss for words. You weren’t sorry at all.
“Is that all you have to say for yourself?”
“What do you want me to say?!”
“That you will leave him alone.”
“You’re in my fucking house. How am I supposed to even—”
“Oh? I didn’t realize that gave you free reign to humiliate him. I heard the way you were making him sound last night.”
“If you’re that bothered, you can leave.”
“I’ve been trying to, but he won’t come with me. Because of you.”
“I—”
“Did you think I wanted to be here this entire time? Every second has been torture.”
“Then just go. Leave him behind if he wants to stay that bad.”
“I won’t let you take him away from me!”
Your hair was standing on end. A single drop of arousal made its way down your thigh. Nai seemed to take pride in frightening you. He stroked your jaw with his fingers before forcing them into mouth. You didn’t even bother fighting back. He pushed them in deeper, savoring the sound of you gagging. Tears welled up in your eyes and trickled down your cheeks.
He pulled them out and smirked. You looked so pathetic, so pliable. His eyes darkened and he leaned in to kiss you. For all his threatening demeanor, his kiss was timid and uncertain. You decided to take initiative and slipped your tongue into his mouth.
This seemed to anger him, or turn him on, you weren’t sure. He shoved you onto the bed, the force of his hands leaving an ache in their wake. He still needed your guidance though. You rolled your tongue up against his. His sloppiness was undeniable, but he was eager which was enough for you.
You reached down and grabbed his cock, cradling it in your palm. He broke the kiss and groaned. You gave it long, languid strokes. He rutted against your hand just like Vash had. The room was overflowing with his moans. You kissed his neck, pressing your lips against his soft skin.
“You sound so cute,” you cooed in between kisses.
He froze, muscles suspended in tension. You rubbed his back, hoping to quell whatever was torturing him.
“Are you alright?”
“Don’t touch me,” he said, pushing himself off of you. His cheeks were flushed and his cock was fighting against his pants. “Ju—just leave me alone.”
There was no hint of forcefulness in his voice, just dismay. And you were flooded with guilt.
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That night, Vash sneaked into your room with a blanket wrapped around him. He dropped it, revealing he wasn’t wearing anything underneath. It hardly phased you. He got into your bed and snuggled up next to you. You tried your best to ignore his presence, but his arms were wrapped around you.
You were still caught up in what had happened earlier in the day between you and Nai. Having Vash so close put you on edge. He’d never given you any reason to fear him, but you wondered if a similar darkness resided in him. Maybe he was just better at hiding it. You couldn’t stop your thoughts, each one painting Vash in a more insidious light.
“Is everything okay? I feel like you were avoiding us.”
“I usually try to avoid your brother.”
“But why meeeee?” he asked.
You turned to face him. His eyes were wide and innocent, like a blue-eyed baby deer. His face turned you into putty. It wasn’t right to effectively punish him for his brother’s actions.
“I don’t have a good answer.”
He pouted. “You can be honest with me.”
“I barely know you,” you said, staring at his lips.
“That didn’t stop you from getting in the tub with me.”
That was a completely different situation under extremely different circumstances. Fucking someone was nowhere near as intimate or taxing as opening yourself up to them. That was like pulling teeth. You never talked to anyone about your feelings, granted you never had an opportunity to. Even in the presence of others, you compulsively closed yourself off. It was second nature.
You chewed on the inside of your cheek. It wasn’t that you didn’t want to feel close to him. You just didn’t know where to begin. You struggled to believe it would spill forth from you naturally once you started. You couldn’t even articulate the hopeless isolation you immersed yourself in.
He looked a little sad, an expression that tortured you to no end. You needed to show him that you wanted to be close to him. Being honest about your feelings was out of the question so you’d have to do it the only way you seemingly knew how.
You held his face in your hands and kissed him. Your passion was steeped in anguish. You hoped he felt your affinity for him, your desire to tell him everything eventually. Your desperation made you sloppy, drool dribbling from your mouth.
Vash pulled away. “Wait.”
He guided you onto your back and tossed your sheet to the side before getting on top of you. He helped you pull your nightgown up and over your head. He rubbed your cunt through your underwear, his fingers pressing against your clit.
“I wanna know what you taste like.”
Your body was practically vibrating. You gently pushed down on his shoulders, an act he was more than happy to comply with.
He positioned himself between your legs and peeled off your underwear. He kissed the inside of your thighs before biting them, sending his pointy teeth into your tender flesh. He used his tongue to spread apart your folds. He rolled it against your clit and waves of pleasure washed over you. Your breathing became increasingly more audible, each exhale sounding more and more like a moan.
“Tell me I’m good,” he growled.
“You’re such a good boy,” you whimpered.
He let out a pleased hum and arched his back, sending his ass into the air. He was relentless, focusing all of his attention on your aching clit. Both of you were incapable of being quiet.
The sound of the door being flung open swiftly annihilated the lusty haze you had been lost in. It was Nai. His eyes were half-lidded, sleep still clinging to them. He was half-dressed, his pants sloppily pulled on. They weren’t even buttoned.
“Why do you keep doing this to me?”
You tried to push Vash away, but kept eating your cunt, disregarding Nai’s presence. Your cheeks felt like they were on fire. You folded your arms across your chest, a hopeless attempt at  shielding yourself from Nai’s gaze.
Vash stared up at you. “Call me a good boy again,” he demanded.
“Yo—you’re such a good boy,” you whimpered once more.
“I can’t believe you keep degrading yourself like this.”
Vash relaxed his back and began to drive his cock into the mattress. His neediness had you reeling. You covered your mouth, trying to hold back your moans. It was bad enough that Nai could see you like this; you didn’t need him hearing you as well.
Your stomach dropped as he approached the bed.
“I’ll help you shut up,” Nai growled.
He got on the bed and gave you a forceful kiss as you came. Once you had settled he pulled away and sat on the edge of your bed with his back towards you.
You tapped on Vash’s head. “Want me to suck your cock?”
“Yes,” he exhaled. “Please.”
Vash sat up only for Nai to grab him by the shoulders.
“I should do it.”
“What? Why?”
“I know your body better than anyone else. Better than she ever could,” he pleaded. Nai sounded so softhearted. You wondered if this was the tone of voice he used when you weren’t around. “Let me show you how much I love you.”
Vash sighed and ultimately agreed. He pushed Nai’s head down, guiding his brother’s mouth onto his erect cock. You watched in shock. You weren’t surprised in the least, but you never thought you’d see it. Your clit felt like it had a heartbeat.
You slipped two of your fingers into your slick cunt. The longer you watched them, the less you cared about the moral implications. You stopped letting your brain do the thinking. You gleefully watched as Vash laced his fingers through Nai’s hair, giving him better leverage as he forced his cock in deeper.
Every so often Nai would gag, but it didn’t deter him. If anything he seemed to enjoy it. He was furiously fucking his fist. You wished it was yours. You practically drooled at the thought. You kept fingering yourself, not taking your eyes off of him.
Vash bucked his hips against his brother’s face. He held his brother’s head close to his body. Nai struggled to keep it together, the sound of his gagging overtaking the room. You let out a dreamy sigh, grabbing Vash’s attention
“What?” you asked breathily.
“I need to fuck you,” he whined.
Vash pulled Nai off of his cock by his hair. His brother erupted into a series of violent coughs as he tried to compose himself. He had a bewildered look in his now dull eyes. You felt a little bad for him, but your pity melted away as Vash hoisted you onto his cock. He laid back, resting his head on your pillow.
You rolled your hips against his, sending his cock deeper inside. You couldn’t deny how good it felt.
“Na—Nai,” you stuttered. “Come here.”
Nai seemed to ignore you at first, but soon enough he was by your side, sitting on his knees.
“What do you want?”
“I want you to suck on my tits.”
He scoffed but still leaned in and started to suck. He swirled his tongue around your nipple. You rubbed the tip of his cock and started to stroke it.
“You’re lucky I’m letting something as inferior as you touch me,” Nai murmured before flicking his tongue against your nipple.
You tried to ignore him, but he continued.
“I still don’t see what he sees in you,” he hissed.
You squeezed his cock. “I bet you wish that was your brother’s hand, huh? Or maybe his mouth?”
Nai was briefly stunned, but recovered in record time. “It would be more satisfying than whatever it is you’re doing to me right now.”
“Your cock seems to like it,” you taunted. Precum had been leaking from his cocktip the entire time you were jerking him off.
“Can you pl—please stop? I’m trying to focus,” Vash whimpered.
“Tell her to behave herself then!”
Vash groaned. “Nai, just come here. You can use my mouth.”
Nai’s eyes lit up and he pulled his pants off. He crawled over to his brother and straddled his face. He started rutting against it. You missed your view of Vash’s angelic face. Nai’s muscled back while beautiful wasn’t nearly as interesting. You felt excluded.
Vash’s thrusts gradually grew uninspired. His focus seemed to be on his brother. You leaned forward and draped your arms over Nai’s shoulders.
“St—stop,” he sighed. “You’re ruining it.”
You ran your hands down his arms and snaked them around his waist. You stroked his abs before moving up to his chest. You pinched his nipple, relishing in the small yelp he let out.
“Am I humiliating you?”
Nai ignored you. You kept rubbing his nipples, taking in his pained whimpers.
“Aw, are you gonna come?”
“Yes,” he said in between his panting.
Nai’s body tensed up as he came in Vash’s mouth. He caught his breath and laid down beside his brother.
You slid Vash’s cock back inside you. He beckoned you near and you leaned forward. His body felt so warm underneath you. His chest was dappled with sweat. He held the back of your head and kissed you, passing Nai’s cum into your mouth. You swallowed it, savoring the sweet taste. Nai exhaled sharply, clearly offended. Neither of you paid him any mind.
Vash held onto your hips as you rode him. As he dug his fingers into your flesh your body was consumed by ecstasy. You felt like you were ascending to a higher plane of existence. You saw white and you could have sworn you were getting blessed by gods.
He continued to thrust until his cock released a deluge of cum inside your cunt. You loved how he sounded whining beneath you. You needed to hear him moan again and again. He couldn’t leave. You wouldn’t let him. You’d even put up with Nai’s hostility.
“That was amazing,” Vash said. There was nothing going behind his eyes; he was utterly fucked out.
You draped yourself on top of him, burying your face in his neck. “It really was.”
You felt around, trying to find Nai’s body next to you on the mattress. Before you even had the chance to touch him, he grabbed your wrist.
“Don’t.”
“Sorry,” you said somberly. “Uh… I had fun… with you.” You hated how hard it was to talk to Nai. Unless you were taunting him sexually you were at a loss for words.
“That’s nice,” he said softly. It lacked the venom he usually infused his words with.
For a while the only sound was the three of you breathing. The reality of what happened sinking into your pores. You didn’t know what to say and it seemed like the brothers were on the same page.
Nai was the one to break the silence. “We really have drifted apart… Haven’t we?”
“Don’t say stuff like that,” Vash mumbled.
“It’s true though.”
“Nai—”
“I was… hoping I would feel closer to you. But I don’t.” He got up and headed towards your door. “I don’t understand you at all.”
Vash gently rolled you off of him and he got up.
“Let’s go to bed.” He grabbed Nai’s pants off the floor. “You’ll feel better by tomorrow.” He rubbed the space between Nai’s shoulder blades and kissed the side of his head. “I’m sure of it.”
You could tell Vash was smiling when he said the last part. The brothers left, leaving you alone in your bed. You gathered your sheet and blanket and wrapped yourself up in them. You held yourself tight and hoped sleep would envelope you.
Instead you tossed and turned. You had been lying in bed for a few hours with your eyes shut and nothing more. Your thoughts wouldn’t stop racing; your actions were on loop in your head. Every moan, every touch, every overwhelming emotion weighed you down.
Vash calling out your name was enough to pull you out of this sleepless daze. You threw on a nightgown and rushed into the hall. Your eyes darted around, trying to figure out where he was. He called your name again. He was downstairs. You tore down the staircase and saw a very distressed Vash pulling his boots on.
“He’s gone. I gotta go after him.”
“He’s gone?”
“We fell asleep right by each other. I don’t know how I didn’t feel him getting up.”
He ran outside, yelling Nai’s name. You stumbled after him barefoot. The sand was unforgiving. Little, sharp rocks wedged themselves between your toes. You struggled to keep up. He was practically sprinting. There was no way you’d reach him.
“Fuck. He’s so fast. What the fuck,” you said in between wheezing. “Vash! Wait—”
Before you could even register it, your ankle gave out and sent you crashing into the sand.
“Shit,” you seethed, body writhing into a fetal position.
The pain was immense. You wanted to fight through it, to keep chasing after Vash. But you’d never catch up. He was as good as gone. Tears welled up in your eyes. You kicked yourself for getting so attached to them so fast. You hated that despite it all you still cared about Nai and wanted to win him over. You had let yourself get carried away by delusions. It wasn’t as if the three of you could live out your days in blissful harmony, no matter how badly you wanted it.
You stared up at the night sky. The moons loomed over you painting the desert in their ethereal light. You felt hopeless and dreaded having to drag yourself back home.
Luckily you heard Vash running back towards you.
“Are you alright?” he said, tripping as his foot got stuck in the sand.
“No… Are you alright?”
He popped up like he never fell in the first place. “Yeah.”
He walked over to you and squatted by your dejected form.
“Why are you crying?” he asked.
You looked up at him. His red rimmed eyes made them look intensely blue.
“I hurt my ankle.”
He held out his hand and hoisted you up.
“Let’s go home,” you said, grabbing onto his shoulder to steady yourself.
“I can’t. I have to find him. I… I promised I’d take care of him.”
“Maybe he went into town,” you suggested.
Vash’s face fell.
“All those people…” he muttered to himself. “I have to go after him, but I can take you back at least.”
He had you hop on his back for a piggyback ride. All you could do was whimper as your tears kept falling. You didn’t even bother speaking. Vash’s mind was elsewhere, unavailable to you. Once you reached home, he put you down and hugged you tightly.
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine,” you lied. “I’ll be alright.”
You turned away and walked into your house. You refused to watch him leave. It would’ve made everything feel a hundred times worse.
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You awoke the next morning feeling hungover. You stretched your arms over your head and got up out of bed. You tried not to think about Vash and Nai, but everything reminded you of them. They had only been around for a short while, but they left their mark everywhere. When you opened your cupboard for coffee, you nearly started sobbing when you saw your last peach.
“Ugh. What’s wrong with me?” you wailed.
You boiled water for coffee and spread some preserves on a piece of cinnamon bread. It tasted ambrosial. At least one thing in your life remained sweet and unproblematic. Once your coffee was done, you poured yourself a cup and made your way to your front door. Sitting on your porch before the suns scorched the earth would do you some good.
As you went to open your door, you hit something on the other side of it.
“Oof.”
You would recognize that pained voice anywhere.
“Vash?”
He moved away from the front of your door and stood up. He looked exhausted.
“I didn’t… I didn’t think you’d come back.”
“Aw. I was hoping you’d think more highly of me.”
You laughed. “I take it you didn’t find him.”
He cast his gaze to the side, staring at the ground.
“Yeah. I even went to town. A group of drunks said they saw a ‘weird guy that looked just like me’ but that was all they said. I’m just glad no one was hurt.”
You wondered why he would be concerned about people getting hurt in regards to his brother, but you didn’t want to pry.
“How’s your ankle?”
“It’s sore, but I can walk on it. Serves me right for running around barefoot.”
He smiled and it warmed your soul. “Can I come in?”
“Yeah! I just made coffee. You should have some. You look like shit.”
He ran his fingers through his windblown hair. “I can’t look that bad.”
“You do. And you’re stinky.”
“What are you gonna do? Give me a bath?”
“I might.”
You led him inside and had him sit at your kitchen table. You poured him a cup of coffee and beamed while he took a sip and burned his tongue.
“You’re so mean to me,” he whined.
“What can I do to make it up to you?”
“Do you have any more of those peaches?”
“I have one left.”
He gazed at you, eyes sparkling. He was like a cheerful vampire glamoring you. You grabbed him a peach and handed it to him. He held it and looked down lovingly at it, like it was a newborn baby.
“How long will you be staying?” you asked, expecting him to give you a short time frame. One that would be wholly unsatisfying.
He looked up from his peach. “Indefinitely assuming you can keep giving me these.”
“I think I can manage that.”
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bless-my-demons · 1 year
Text
Redamancy: Prologue
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Jasper Hale x Reader
Series Summary: What happens when your soulmate is a vampire that struggles to maintain a diet of trying not to kill you? Common sense says run for the hills, nothing is worth your life - but my heart is whispering why not, what’s there to lose?
Warnings: None for this chapter [this also isn’t beta’d so bear with me]
Notes: it took me so long to work up the courage to actually post my first work, so enjoy! I’ll be over here anxiously awaiting your thoughts.
Word Count: 705
Series Masterlist
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A clear horizon. An orange sunset fading into vivid pinks and purples as the atmosphere darkens in preparation for the night. Evening sun warming your face, the space around you drifting into silence as calm settles into your bones, time halting its ever constant forward march, no thoughts or worries.
That’s what it felt like, the moment my eyes met Jasper Hale’s. Like I was done searching for what my heart was in need of as soon as I glanced into those golden pools of his.
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• January 24th, 2005 • Forks High School •
Reader
Based on the non-stop gossip floating around this microscopic high school, I’m the newest kid on the block. Dethroning the most recent to wear the title, Bella Swan, the Police Chief’s daughter.
Now, I’m not opposed to the Olympic Peninsula of Washington State, but Forks could strive to be a little more than a one-stoplight town and add a few more amenities. This big city Texas girl needs a little more than Forks Outfitters - the one stop shop for food, basic clothing, and hardware.
I left Dallas because my mom needed me here, my dad didn’t want to trade sunshine and big ranches for rain and freezing temperatures. They’re happily divorced, but I can tell that over time it’s worn her down. I’m just a junior in high school, but I guess she and I can navigate this together.
God, let there be cute boys at this high school, I’m begging you.
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I was almost immediately accosted by what I deemed the welcoming committee the moment I locked the door to my car and began the dreaded ‘new kid’ trek to the front office of Forks High School. Stares came from anyone loitering in the parking lot before class while this overly-excited kid, who introduced himself as Eric Yorkie, began what had to be a well rehearsed ‘anything you need’ spiel.
All hopes of flying under the radar halfway through junior year vanished into thin air and I hadn’t even made it to the sidewalk yet.
“Eric? I really appreciate your help and concern, but I was hoping to kinda just glide in on my first day and blend in.” I said as we walked together through the wet parking lot, dodging the bigger puddles so I wouldn't soak my shoes before I got to my first class of the day.
“Oh that’s pretty much impossible here, newcomers are always the only thing everyone talks about. Don’t be scared to hit me up with questions later though, good luck!” Shouting that last part as he dashed off to class, turning the heads of a few close students.
A deep sigh passed my lips as I trudged on, pulling open the heavy door to the administration office. It’s nice to have someone offer help on my first day, I just wish this town was big enough so that I could get lost on everyone’s list of priorities to gossip about or stare at.
Today is going to be a long day.
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“Good morning dear!” A sweet older woman announced from behind the central desk in the front office. The name plate in front of her reading ‘Administrative Secretary Shelly Cope’.
“Good morning Miss Cope. I’m Y/n Y/l/n, here to pick up my class schedule and hopefully a map of the place?” I said, cutting to the chase. The front office is a giant fish bowl to the students walking by outside, no one wants to spend more time than necessary here on their first day.
“Oh yes! I’ve got it all printed out and ready to go for ya dear, along with your locker assignment.” She says with a smile, passing the papers across her desk. “Let me know if you have any questions or if you need help with anything!”
“Yes ma’am, thank you!” I responded, half reading my new schedule - half aware of where I was going as I press a shoulder to the exit.
First period Biology
Second period English
Third period Spanish
Fourth period Trigonom-
The front office door smacks straight into an unsuspecting, gorgeous, golden-eyed fellow student, sending the papers clutched in my hands to the ground.
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