#and refusal to listen to anything any of them actually said except maybe frank

[raytorosaurus]

who the fuck is ode2 I can't find their blog????

lol honestly don't wanna give them any more attention than they used to get so i'm not gonna link their blog but they were an extremely extremely disrespectful and invasive tinhatter who would openly speculate about things including but not limited to gerard's struggles with addiction, parenting style, marital relationship etc, based on evidence of absolutely nothing (besides their ~special connection~ with frank) to push the narrative that gerard has been stringing frank along in some kind of sick abusive sexual relationship for years and years while lynz is also abusing gerard and controlling his every move and sapping his personality and also cyberbullying frank on instagram stories LMAO. seems like they got their entire worldview shattered when mcr returned and confirmed that, shock horror, they are in fact friends who enjoy spending time with each other, because they've stopped posting theories so much on their blog and wrote a pinned message that includes the point "YES grown adults act like teenage girls on social media," said entirely seriously and unironically. they're kind of like the example of that one breed of frerardie who claims to love frank but seems to ignore his actual personality in favour of treating him like a poor uwu abused baby who's never stood up for anything once in his life and treats gerard like an idol rather than a friend, but magnified by a million and even more disconnected from reality. genuinely a really sad blog filled with a lot of hate and im glad they've stepped back from spending every day posting about their theories

[wiypt-writes]

Riding On

Ch 16- A Whole Fucking Hand Of Aces Part 1

Summary: It’s the run up to Christmas now for our favourite family, but it isn’t all happiness and smiles as Greg brings Fliss and Frank some worrying news about their adoption application. When Fliss enrols Bonnie’s help and the two women turn detective they uncover something that leaves Fliss both stunned and shocked. But, after a little contemplation, her and Frank realise that maybe, just maybe, they can work this to their advantage after all.

Warnings: Some VERY Bad Language words (Frank has a potty mouth…) Descriptions of panic attack-please avoid if this triggers.

Pairing: Frank Adler x Fliss Gallagher

A/N:  Some nitty, gritty action and angst over this chapter so I hope you’re ready… buckle up! Big thanks to @icanfeelastormbrewing for reading this (sorry Frank had to put a shirt on) and @southerngracela for helping me with a crucial bit here that I have very limited experience on.

Disclaimer: This is a pure work of fiction and classified as 18+. Please respect this and do not read if you are underage. I do not own any characters in this series bar Fliss Gallagher and the other OCs. By reading beyond this point you understand and accept the terms of this disclaimer.

Riding On Masterlist // Main Masterlist

Chapter 15

When you’re weak, I’ll be strong. When you let go, I’ll hold on. When you need to cry, I swear that I’ll be there to dry your eyes. When you feel lost and scared to death, like you can’t take one more step, just take my hand, together we can do it. I’m gonna love you through it.

December 2019

Fliss set the mug down on the coffee table in front of where Greg sat in the arm chair. Their friend had called earlier that day to say he had finally had a response from an attorney representing Bradley Polland, Mary’s biological father regarding the Adoption.

And it hadn’t been good news. Frank’s worse fear had been realised, the man was contesting. Frank hadn’t received the news particularly well, storming out of work and straight home, blazing in a fit of anger that was very unlike him, and Fliss had taken charge and asked Greg to come over later that night once Mary was in bed so they could discuss it in a calm and hopefully logical manner. As always, he was happy to oblige.

Greg flashed Fliss a smile and thanked her before she sat next to Frank on the sofa, her hand reaching for his. Their fingers laced together and she gave a little squeeze and he looked at her, giving her a tight smile.

“Don’t get too despondent yet.” Greg sighed, “I know it’s shitty but like I said on the phone Frank, we have a damned good chance on winning this in court.”

“I just don’t fucking understand Greg.” Frank shook his head “Why? Why is he contesting? He doesn’t give a shit about her, we know that. He’s never even laid eyes on her in person. Fucking ass hole.” His tone we venomous, his face creased in anger and Fliss gently squeezed his fingers again. He took a deep breath and shook his head “Sorry, I’m just…” “Buddy, I can’t begin to imagine how you feel.” Greg sighed, “And I’m sorry I can’t answer your question because I don’t know what his reasoning is.” The man shrugged as he took a sip of his tea. “Maybe the fact that the adoption would completely remove any rights he has to her has sparked some deep buried paternal instinct...” “Bull shit.” Frank scoffed, leaning back in his chair. Greg looked at Fliss who took a deep breath.

“So, what happens now?” she asked, trying to keep calm. One of them had to have a level head after all.

“Well, there’ll be a little to-ing and fro-ing before court but my first action, which I did as soon as that letter landed this morning, was to get onto Child Welfare. They’ll prep a report on Mary, how settled she is, happy, basically in support of the adoption.” Greg licked his lips “But I want you both to know, that there is absolutely no way that Mary is gonna get taken away from you.” He looked at Frank straight in the eyes as Frank looked back. “Even if Polland petitions for custody, which he won’t…” he held his hand up, cutting Frank off before he could start again “No Court in their right mind is gonna rip her out of her home here and put her with him, not now. You have Legal Guardian Status Frank, that’s not gonna change. At most he will get visitation.”

“What if Mary doesn’t want to see him?” Fliss asked as Frank looked away, his eyes roving over the garden are which was light up by the various solar lights speckled around the decking and lawn, the pool lights turning the whole area to the left of the garden a vivid shade of aqua, desperately trying to keep his cool.

“Then the CWD will reflect that in their report.” Greg nodded. “But this is absolute worst case scenario. You both need to understand that there is a really, really high chance that the court will overrule his objection and allow the Adoption to go through anyway. She’s been with you all her life Frank, whilst he may have a biological link to her, he has nothing else. And the court won’t look favourably on his actions. We saw that in the case versus your mother.” “So this might actually not mean a thing?” Fliss looked at Greg.

“Exactly.” Greg smiled “You’re in a very good position. This…it’s just a little bump in the road.”

“Then why does it feel like a huge fucking road block?” Frank looked at Greg and his best friend sighed.

“Because you’re panicking.” Greg said simply “You’re over thinking it, like you always do. Trust me Frank, this is going to change nothing…” “How can you say that?” Frank looked at him. “Of course it’s gonna change something, that little girl up there thinks we’re gonna be adopting her and now I’m gonna haff to tell her that that might naht be the case…”

His accent grew thicker, the way it always did when he was emotional and Fliss squeezed his hand once more and turned to face him.

“Frank, nothing changes from our home front, that’s what Greg means.” She said, and Greg nodded in agreement. “And as for telling her, then we do what we always do. We be honest, we explain it simply and we reassure her if she gets anxious. That’s all we can do for now. And then, whatever happens we face it together as a family.” Frank sighed and looked down at his feet before he looked at Greg, shaking his head “Sorry man, I didn’t mean to snap.” “Don’t sweat it.” Greg shook his head “But I mean what I say pal, this isn’t like last time when, I’ll be honest, I didn’t think we had a cat in hells chance of keeping her from your mother, despite how much I was behind you, and you know that. This time, well, not only have your entire circumstances changed now in that she has a perfect home, a family, stability…” he took a deep breath, “And you are her legal guardian. No court will strip that from you unless there’s exceptional circumstances. And these are not. The only card Polland has to play is that he still has his Parental Rights, he’s got nothing else. He has never met her, never talked to her, never paid a dime towards her. In contrast, you on the other hand have a whole fucking hand of Aces to play back. There’s no way she’s going anywhere, adoption or not, which is the main thing here. That she stays with you. You two are her parents in everything but name and the court and CWD will see that.”

There was nothing much more that Greg could tell them at that point, other than to walk them through the next steps in a little more detail. He talked them through how the CWD would be in contact and that they’d want to speak to Mary alone, then they’d want to speak to both of them too, and that was as far as he was prepared to go, refusing to even think about anything beyond that. Which in itself was frustrating the hell out of Frank, but Fliss understood exactly why Greg was being so reserved. It was information overload, and Frank being the very analytical and cerebral person he was would end up even more frustrated as Greg would have no answer to the barrage of questions he was likely to have.

It was only when Alex made the familiar noises of hunger that the 3 of them called time on their discussion and Fliss stood up and headed to the bassinet to the side of the sofa. 

"He's getting so big." Greg beamed and Alex, momentarily forgetting his hunger, locked his eyes onto his godfather's and gave him a huge smile. "Hey fella!" Greg ran a finger down his cheek and Alex wiggled his arms in response. "He looks like you pal." Greg looked at Frank as he grinned. "Poor little bugger." 

“Fuck you.” Frank snorted, and Fliss pouted dramatically.

"I happen to think is daddy is very handsome." She looked at Frank whose lips curled into a smile at one side for what felt like the first time that day before he turned to Greg. 

"I'll see you out."

Greg looked at him and then nodded, and with a final goodbye to Fliss, he left the family room with Frank behind him

“Tell me honestly Greg, and no bullshit…” Frank looked ad his friend as they strode towards Greg’s silver benz which was parked behind Fliss’ Cherokee “Am I gonna lose her?”

“Have you just listened to a damned word I said Frank?” Greg looked at him. “Read my lips. Not a chance. Honestly Frank, you have the upper hand here. This is nothing like last time.”

Frank nodded and gave his friend a tight smile as he climbed into his car, turning and heading back inside giving a whistle for Thor to follow him, the dog having wandered outside at the same time he had. But despite his friend’s assurances, he just couldn’t shake the worry from the back of his mind that this entire thing was going to rip their family apart.

He paused in the doorway and watched Fliss who was now feeding Alex his bottle, her eyes locked on that of their son and he felt a little lump in his throat. He swallowed and spoke, his voice sounding strangely far away to him.

“Want me to do that?” he asked. Fliss looked at him, immediately recognising his offer for what it actually was, a request. He wanted to do it. And she knew why. It was a way to keep himself grounded, away from the spiralling thoughts in his mind.

“Sure.” She nodded as Frank sat down. She handed Alex over and then kissed Frank’s cheek. “Try not to worry sweetheart, I know it’s a shitty set back but it’ll work out.”

“You’re optimistic.” Frank looked down at Alex as he took his milk before he glanced up at Fliss “I wish I was.”

“You heard Greg.” She gently lay her hand on his neck, her fingers softly stroking at his skin of the nape “This isn’t like last time.”

“I know.”  He nodded, before he fixed a smile on his face “Why don’t you go for that bath you were talking about before?”

“You gonna be ok?”

He nodded “Yeah, I’ll be up once he’s finished.”

“Ok.” Fliss nodded, kissing him again before she stood up and left Frank alone with his son.

**** Try as he might Frank couldn’t sleep that night, his mind was whirring at 100 miles an hour, and in the end he gave up before his tossing and turning disturbed either Fliss or Alex. He climbed out of bed, pulled on a pair of sweats and a t-shirt before he peered down at Alex who was asleep in his crib. As he headed to the door he reached down and gave Thor’s ears a scratch as the dog looked up from his spot in his basket before he padded silently into the hallway and softly pushed Mary’s bedroom door open. She too was fast asleep, Fred curled up next to her head on the pillow. She looked so peaceful, so content. And Frank knew that’s because she was. She was safe, she was loved, she was wanted- boy was she wanted- and the thought that her life, that their lives might be upturned by that shit head Polland made Frank’s stomach churn.

He knew he was over thinking things. He had always been the same. He retreated into his mind, and no matter how many times Fliss or Greg had told him not to worry that night he just couldn’t help it. He’d almost lost her once, and the thought that he might actually lose her for good this time was unbearable. His mouth suddenly became dry and he needed a drink, so closing the door behind him softly he headed down the stairs and pulled open the fridge, reaching for a bottle of water.

He drained the bottle in one but that did nothing to help the hot and clammy feeling that was now washing over him, causing a light beading of sweat to dust his brow. He wiped it away with the back of his hand and as he did so his belly dropped out from him and a sick feeling spread across his body, almost like he was going to puke. He gripped the edge of the counter, hovering over the sink, eyes closed as the room began to spin and his chest suddenly began to hurt. He found himself unable to catch his breath as his throat tightened and he scrunched his eyes shut as they were burning from the unshed, salty tears. Then, he could hold the feeling of desperation and panic no more and he turned, sliding to the floor in a dishevelled heap, his back banging painfully against the lower kitchen cabinets as he struggled to ground himself. When his chest finally released enough for him to take a huge, shaky, painful breath it was all too much and his anxiety poured out in a flood of uncontrollable tears, the deep emotions stirring with no other outlet but his silent crying.

How long he was there he had no idea, locked in his own mind and worries, but then a voice broke through the cloud in his mind and a familiar presence filled his senses.

“Frankie…” Fliss gently placed her hand on Frank’s shoulder as she knelt down next to him. “Oh Baby…”

He mumbled something incoherent, choking on his sobs, his face buried between his arms as they hugged his knees to his chest, and she moved to wrap her arms around him. His own arms moved and he wrapped them around her back, clinging to her with a desperation she’d never seen or felt from him before as he pressed his face into the crook of her shoulder.

“Shhhh, I got you…” she whispered to him, kissing his head. “I got you.”

The two of them sat on the kitchen floor, Fliss soothing him, pressing the odd kiss to his head, running her hand up his spine over his t-shirt with one hand, the fingers of the other fingers brushing the back of his neck, a movement she knew he found comforting. Knowing from her own experiences, there was nothing else to be done other than stay with him and let him cry it out she did just that. Eventually, she felt his broad shoulders begin to relax a little as his sobs turned into smaller cries, which then morphed into small hiccups, until eventually they subsided completely and there was no sound in the room bar his deep, ragged breathing. After a moment or so of relative quiet,  he pulled away and Fliss turned her head towards him, taking in his appearance and it broke her heart. His face was red and blotchy, those blue eyes she could drown in were bloodshot and looked at her sadly from beneath puffy eyelids. He moved his arm to wipe at his nose and then took a deep, stuttering breath.

“You with me?” Fliss asked gently and he nodded, taking another shaky breath.

“Sorry, I didn’t want to wake you.” He spoke, his throat felt raw and his voice was gruff and croaky, not sounding like his own. Fliss shook her head.

“Don’t you dare apologise Frank.” She said gently “There’s nothing to be sorry for.”

“We had such a wonderful Thanksgiving a few weeks ago, and we should be looking forward to Alex’s first Christmas and now…” “Hey, hey…” Fliss cut him off, her hands taking his face gently, pads of her fingers threading into his beard. “Thanksgiving was wonderful, because we were all together. Christmas is gonna be wonderful because we will still all be together.”

“I can’t lose her Liss, I can’t lose any of you, I just…” “And you’re not gonna.” She said, her voice calm and quiet. “Greg told you this before. The worst that can happen is Polland is gonna get visitations.” “But what if she wants to live with him? What if she-“ “Oh Frank.” Fliss sighed “That’s not even a remote possibility. Mary worships the ground you walk on. She adores Alex. She loves her home, her life…if anything, I think she’s going to refuse to even see him. You saw how heartbroken she was that day we had to talk her out of the bathroom during the court-case. She won’t have forgotten that.”

Frank raised his eyes to Fliss’ and she smiled at him softly, her hands still on his face “Baby, she might only be 9 but she’s not stupid. She knows you gave everything you had to make sure she’s had a good life. You kept her safe, loved. I’ll say it over and over till I’m blue in the face Frank, you ARE her father. In everything but biology. And Bill and I are proof here that biology doesn’t mean a fucking thing.”

“She adores you too you know.” Frank said, and Fliss smiled softly pressing her forehead to his

“Good because I adore her right back. And her big, soft, lump of an uncle-slash-father who happens to be a wonderful man with a huge heart, who knows he isn’t perfect but doesn’t try to be.” Her hands slid down from his face, one resting on his shoulder, the other back to stroking the nape of his neck. Frank closed his eyes, taking a deep breath as her touch washed over him. “A man who strives every day to be the best version of himself, but doesn’t really need to because he’s already the best daddy and partner in the world.”

“Liss I’m not-“ “You’re not perfect, yes I know.” She smiled “But that makes you perfect to me.”

Frank took a deep breath and closed his eyes as her fingers continued to gently stroke at his neck, all the time her movements sending gently sparks of warmth down his back. His breathing had settled down now, his tears stopped. He felt calmer.

“I love you.” He said softly and Fliss smiled, pulling back a little

“I know.” She looked at him “I love you too.”

His hand reached up for the one that was resting on his shoulder and his fingers tangled with hers, and he squeezed gently, relishing the feel of her engagement ring as it pressed against his middle and ring finger. And then, almost by magic, a soft gurgle came from the baby monitor on the side in the kitchen.

“See, Bean loves his daddy too.” Fliss smiled and Frank gave a little chuckle. “Wanna come back to bed?”

He nodded.

Fliss stood up and offered Frank her hand, tugging him up beside her. Without a word she led him down the hall and up the stairs. Frank headed straight to Alex who was on his back, his eyes flickering as he slept, his head turned gently to the right, little hand curling by his cheek. Frank tenderly ran a finger over his soft skin and the little boy reacted to the touch, his limbs stretching a little before he settled back down, his breathing even, his eyes closing.

“I still don’t know how we made something so special.” Fliss whispered, her arms curling round Frank’s waist from behind.

“He’s part you.” Frank replied softly, and Fliss gave a chuckle.

“Yeah, well, like I said, his daddy’s pretty awesome too.” Frank turned round to face her and dropped a gentle kiss to her mouth, his nose sliding against hers before he gave a little yawn. “Sorry…” he said as Fliss chuckled.

“Come on Sailor, let’s try and get some sleep before he wakes us up.”

Frank moved and slid into the covers, settling down as Fliss led besides him. He turned onto his side to look at her and she brushed her hand through his untidy, fluffy hair and then opened her arms. With the air of a small child he sank into them, his head resting against her chest, arms moving so that they wrapped around her, like a koala bear. Her hand once more resumed its gentle stroking on his neck and it wasn’t long before Fliss felt his tense shoulders relax, his breathing grew even and she glanced down to see those long eyelashes resting against his freckled cheeks as he slept. She pressed a kiss to his head and closed her eyes and finally let her own emotion crash over her as she let out a few silent tears of her own.

***** “I just don’t get it Bonnie.” Fliss sighed gently, as Bonnie took the coffee she was offering, the two women heading over to the breakfast bar. “Why now? Why after so fucking long is he suddenly interested?”

“I wish I could answer that for you.” Bonnie was sympathetic, as Fliss’ eyes flicked over to Mary who was led on the play-mat by the TV with Alex. He was led on his back and Mary was playing peek-a-boo with him, hiding her face behind his large stuffed Elephant pillow which had been a present from Steve and Sian when they’d taken the kids to the zoo.  Alex showing his appreciation by smiling at her and giggling, his arms and leg waving as he shrieked with happiness.

“I just can’t shake the feeling that there’s more to it.” Fliss bit her lip and Bonnie looked at her.

“What do you mean?”

“Well…” Fliss shifted a little, dropping her voice even more. “When Polland turned up in the Custody case, Frank was always adamant that Evelyn had paid him, even though he denied it and she denied it and we had no evidence. Frank’s still to this day 100% convinced that’s why he came forward. He wasn’t interested in Mary…”

“Has he asked Evelyn since?”

“No.” Fliss shook her head. “They’re in a good place. It’s not perfect but its ok, and they have this unspoken agreement now that they don’t talk about it. They moved on so…”

“Maybe you should ask her.” Bonnie said.

Fliss shrugged “I don’t know if I want to drag it all back up.”

“Yeah, but if you think someone is putting him up to this…”

“I don’t, well, I do, maybe…”  Fliss hesitated as she tried to put what she was thinking into words “I don’t know, what I think to be honest, other than there must be something else in it for Pollland. Sorry, I’m not making much sense.” “No, I get it.” Bonnie assured him. The two women sat in silence before Bonnie clicked her fingers as she looked at Fliss “Facebook. Have you checked him out?”

“Already tried, he’s blocked me and Frank…same on Instagram. Not that I’m sure it would help but…”

“Well he won’t have blocked me…” Bonnie shrugged “Might be a dead end but you never know. Worth a good old social media stalk, don’t you think?”

Fliss looked at Mary, then to Bonnie again before she nodded “Ok…do it.”

Bonnie pulled her phone out and scrolled down, tapping open the App. “What’s his name?”

“Polland.” Fliss said gently “Brad…”

Bonnie tapped at the screen and then turned it to Fliss, “That him?”

Fliss nodded. “Yeah…”

“Damned it his profile is locked down…” Bonnie said, her eyes roving over the screen. “Let me try his insta…” She continued to tap at her phone and grinned “Well he hasn’t locked this down…”she started to scroll down the screen and then stopped, frowning a little “Hang on…why do I recognise this woman?”

“Let me see?”

She pushed the phone over the counter and Fliss stared at it for a moment. It was a picture of Polland in a suit, with a team of people she assumed must be work colleagues. “Which one?”

“The one 2 down from him to his right.”

Fliss looked closer and then she felt her heart skip a beat. “I don’t fucking believe it…”

“What?”

“That’s Anna.” She said gently “Richard’s wife.” “Richard as in…” Bonnie trailed off as Fliss swallowed and looked at her.

“My ex brother in law. We saw them in Miami…” The realisation crashed over Fliss in a huge wave as she stared at the photo, the ghosts once again of her past back to haunt her only this time in a way she could never have imagined. This was the link, the Stazikers. She’d bet her life on it.

“Why now?” Bonnie asked gently “I mean this photo is from a few years back, so…” “I wasn’t with Frank when the case went down, not fully anyway.” Fliss said, biting her lip “None of them would have made the connection back then, they didn’t even know where I was. This will be their way of punishing me. John died whilst in prison for an attack on me, Richard did a few months inside too for his part. They’ve always blamed me, even when John pleaded guilty.” She took a deep breath and looked at Bonnie “Ok, can you go through and screen shot ANYTHING you see that links him to the Stazikers, then send it to me.” “What you gonna do?” Bonnie asked “Tell Frank?”

“Not yet.” Fliss said, “I need to speak to Evelyn first.”

“Why?”

“Because I’m gonna ask her once and for all if she paid Polland.” Fliss looked at Bonnie, her eyes blazing “Because if she did, it makes it all the more likely he’s taking a back hander again.” *****

“Fliss?” Evelyn’s voice hit Fliss’ ears as she sat in the study, sitting at the desk.  

“HI Evelyn.” Fliss said, taking a deep breath “Have you got a minute?”

“Yes, of course…what’s the matter?”

“I need to ask you something. And I want an honest answer. Bradley Polland…” “What about him?” Evelyn’s voice took a gruff turn.

“Did you pay him?”

“What?”

“When he appeared at Mary’s case. Did you pay him?”

“Why are you asking me this?”

“Because yesterday we had notification he’s actively contesting the Adoption application.” Fliss said, keeping her voice calm “And I’m trying to understand why. I have a theory but…”

“It’s nothing to do with me if that’s what you think…” “No, I don’t.” Fliss appeased as Evelyn’s voice was harsh. “I’m just trying to gather the facts before I go back to Greg. But I need to know honestly Evelyn, did you pay him.”

She sighed “Not exactly, no.” “Well what exactly did you do?”

“Polland works for an accountancy company.” Evelyn hesitated slightly before she continued “He’s in charge of their New Business department. I had a word with my contacts at the University and it ended up in a very lucrative deal for his firm, meaning he got a promotion. I’m not proud of it…but…”

Fliss took a deep breath. There was some satisfaction that her suspicion had been correct but also an underlying sense of frustration at how Evelyn could have ever been so damned sneaky. But, she had to remind herself that this was all in the past now. They had all moved on, and made some pretty monumental steps in that department. But this was now threatening to blow all of this out of the water.

“Thank you for being honest with me.” She replied after a second or two.

“Fliss, you have to understand, I was desperate.” Evelyn said gently. “I’d do anything to take it all back.”

“Look, I’m not interested in dragging this up for an argument.” Fliss shook her head as she spoke “As we all keep saying, what’s done is done. I just needed to know if I was right.” “You think someone is paying him to do this?”

“Yes.” Fliss said bluntly “And I have a good idea who.”

“Are you going to tell me?”

“Not yet.” Fliss licked her lips. “I need to talk to Frank first.”

“Ok, well if there’s anything I can do please let me know.”

“Of course, I’ll let you know.

After bidding her mother-in-law goodbye, Fliss hung up and dropped the phone onto the desk before she let out a little groan and stood up, heading back into the living room. Mary looked up at her where she was sat on the sofa, and Fliss smiled as she saw Alex was curled up on-top of his comforter on the play-mat, cuddling to his beloved elephant.

“He fell asleep” Mary said, “I was watching him but you said not to try and lift him without you here so…” “Mary, he’s fine babe.” Fliss smiled, “Honestly, you did good. Top babysitter.” She leaned over and gave the girl a hi-five before she took a quick photo and sent it to Frank. Placing her phone on the coffee table she dropped down besides Mary. “What you looking at?” Fliss nodded at the laptop.

“I’m chatting to Rosie.” Mary said, turning the Macbook so Fliss could she see had the instant messenger service from the school network open “We were talking about Christmas and stuff. She asked if I can go and sleep over tomorrow night seeing as it’s the holidays.”

“You wanna?”

“Yeah.” “Then fine by me.” Fliss said, giving a little yawn “I can’t see Frank having a problem with it. I’m teaching in the afternoon so I can drop you either before or after.”

“Ok, I’ll tell her you said yes.” Mary smiled, “See what time she says I can go over. I can ride Monty in the morning again like I did today.”

“Sounds like plan, kiddo.” Fliss nodded “We can do the trail if you want when I’ve done the classes for the morning.”

“Awesome!” Mary grinned.

“Oh, and I know I said I was gonna make chicken parm for dinner but I seriously cannot be bothered. I’m thinking I might throw some frozen pizzas in and do some dirty fries instead.”

Mary grinned “I love dirty fries.” “So does Frank.” Fliss smiled

“He needs cheering up.” Mary nodded “He looked sad this morning.”

“He just has some stuff going on at work.” Fliss said, batting the question away “He’ll be fine.”

At that point her phone went off, it was a message back from the man in question responding to her photo of Alex.

Lucky little bastard!  I’d kill for a nap right now, I’m exhausted. Finishing early so should be home in an hour or so. Love you all xxx

“See.” She showed it to Mary “Just tired.”

“Can we bake some brownies?” Mary asked, her face hopeful “They always cheer him up.”

“Sure.” Fliss smiled, standing up, completely not bothering to point out to Mary that was more hassle than the chicken parm, it was such a thoughtful thing to want to do that Fliss instantly felt her heart melt as she agreed. “Go get the bowls and stuff ready, I’ll put Bean in the crib.” To be fair it only took half an hour to mix the batter and get it in the oven. They then turned their attention to the fries and pizzas, shoving those in too before they returned back to the sofa, Fliss finding “Miracle on 34th Street” on one of the channels so they settled down to watch, the Christmas tree lights twinkling in the corner of the room. And that was how Frank found them when he came in from work about 20 minutes or so later. Both of them sat on the sofa, Mary snuggled into Fliss as they were giggling at the TV in the now dim-light of the room.

“Hey.” He smiled and Fliss looked up at him, taking the kiss he offered before he ruffled Mary’s head “Again?” he nodded to the TV and Mary glared at him.

“It happens to be one of my favourites.” “Don’t I know it.” He rolled his eyes. He then paused, the smell of baking hitting his nostrils, and looked around, before he glanced back at them, grinning “You made brownies?”

“Not just any brownies…” Mary grinned “Salted caramel ones.” Frank groaned “I love you both.”

Mary sniggered “Fliss said you would say that.”

Frank smiled “Imma take a shower ok? Be down in a second.”

“Actually, I need to talk to you.” Fliss said, looking at him significantly.

“Ok.” He frowned.

“You ok here Mary?” Fliss looked at her. “Keep an eye on Alex for me again?”

“What are you going to talk about?”

“Nonya.” Frank looked at her.

“Nonya?” Mary frowned.

“Yeah, Nonya-business.” He said, straightening up as she gave a groan.

“That’s so lame.” Mary sighed, rolling her eyes. Fliss and Frank headed upstairs into their bedroom, where Fliss took a deep breath. She didn’t even bother telling Frank to stay calm, because she knew it was futile. And, true to her prediction, when she explained what she’d found out he reacted exactly how she had predicted. Angry, upset, frustrated. He grit his teeth, swore and then started stomping around the room.

“I know, I know…” she soothed as he slammed a drawer shut, tossing a pair of joggers onto the bed. “But, this is good Frank.” “Good, how is any of this good Lissy?” he seethed “I…” “Because it gives us an angle.” She said gently “If we tell Greg about this…whilst we may not have any solid proof it provides him with a line of attack. Raises questions. And we have Evelyn too, I’m pretty sure she’ll go on record about what went down last time. It’s a total smear on his character.”

Frank took a deep breath, running his hand through his hair. “You know what, I can’t…I can’t process this now, I need to think.”

“Ok.” Fliss said, looking down at the carpet, swallowing a little as she took a deep breath. “I’m sorry.” “Sorry?” Frank frowned “What are you sorry for?”

“Because this is my fault isn’t it?” she stated, more than asked, and Frank was horrified to see the tears in her eyes. “It’s all down to John, again.” “Stop.” Frank said firmly, shaking his head as he strode round the side of the bed to where she was stood. “Lissy, this isn’t your fault baby. Not at all. I’m not mad at you, I promise.”

“Maybe, but if I wasn’t involved, this wouldn’t be happening and…” she took a deep breath and Frank shook his head once more, wiping her tears away. “He’s fucking dead Frank and still…” “Look.” Frank sighed, “You don’t control what that shit head family do now any more than you did back then, ok? I’m sorry for snapping I just…” “I know.” She nodded, her hands wrapping around his wrists as his calloused fingers caressed her cheek.

“But please don’t for one second think I blame you for any of this. This is down to him, and if the Stazikers are the only reason he’s doing this then he’s an even bigger shit head than we thought.”

“You know, Steeb says he can make him vanish.” Fliss shrugged “Concrete shoes, bottom of the ocean.”

Frank chuckled and his hands dropped to her hips “Don’t tempt me.”  

“So what do you want to do about it?” Fliss asked. Frank bit his lip for a moment as he considered his play and then he looked back at her, determination on his face.

“Once I’ve showered I’ll call Evelyn and check she’s ok, as no doubt she’s pacing the floor at home now, panicking.”

“You not mad at her?”

“Mad? I’m fucking raging but what’s the point of going over it all?” he sighed, “I always knew deep down she’d done something and we worked so hard to put it behind us…”

“And the rest of it?”

“Well after I speak to Mother, I’ll get onto Greg, tell him what we know.” He spoke determinedly “If the fucking cunts want a dirty fight, then they can have one.”

**** Chapter 16 Part 2

[what-is-your-plan-today]

Riding On

Ch 16- A Whole Fucking Hand Of Aces

Part 1

Summary: It’s the run up to Christmas now for our favourite family, but it isn’t all happiness and smiles as Greg brings Fliss and Frank some worrying news about their adoption application. When Fliss enrols Bonnie’s help and the two women turn detective they uncover something that leaves Fliss both stunned and shocked. But, after a little contemplation, her and Frank realise that maybe, just maybe, they can work this to their advantage after all.

Warnings: Some VERY Bad Language words (Frank has a potty mouth…) Descriptions of panic attack-please avoid if this triggers.

Pairing: Frank Adler x Fliss Gallagher

A/N:  Some nitty, gritty action and angst over this chapter so I hope you’re ready… buckle up! Big thanks to @icanfeelastormbrewing​ for reading this (sorry Frank had to put a shirt on) and @southerngracela​ for helping me with a crucial bit here that I have very limited experience on. And to @sweater-daddiesdumbdork​ for her opinions and also being as in love with dirty boat daddy as I am...

Chapter Song: I’m Gonna Love You Through It by Martina McBride (Ok, so this song makes me damned cry due to the sentiment behind it, and fits Frank and Fliss here so much…)

Series Masterlist //  WIYPT Masterlist

When you’re weak, I’ll be strong. When you let go, I’ll hold on. When you need to cry, I swear that I’ll be there to dry your eyes. When you feel lost and scared to death, like you can’t take one more step, just take my hand, together we can do it. I’m gonna love you through it.

December 2019

Fliss set the mug down on the coffee table in front of where Greg sat in the arm chair. Their friend had called earlier that day to say he had finally had a response from an attorney representing Bradley Polland, Mary’s biological father regarding the Adoption.

And it hadn’t been good news. Frank’s worse fear had been realised, the man was contesting. Frank hadn’t received the news particularly well, storming out of work and straight home, blazing in a fit of anger that was very unlike him, and Fliss had taken charge and asked Greg to come over later that night once Mary was in bed so they could discuss it in a calm and hopefully logical manner. As always, he was happy to oblige.

Greg flashed Fliss a smile and thanked her before she sat next to Frank on the sofa, her hand reaching for his. Their fingers laced together and she gave a little squeeze and he looked at her, giving her a tight smile.

“Don’t get too despondent yet.” Greg sighed, “I know it’s shitty but like I said on the phone Frank, we have a damned good chance on winning this in court.”

“I just don’t fucking understand Greg.” Frank shook his head “Why? Why is he contesting? He doesn’t give a shit about her, we know that. He’s never even laid eyes on her in person. Fucking ass hole.” His tone we venomous, his face creased in anger and Fliss gently squeezed his fingers again. He took a deep breath and shook his head “Sorry, I’m just…” “Buddy, I can’t begin to imagine how you feel.” Greg sighed, “And I’m sorry I can’t answer your question because I don’t know what his reasoning is.” The man shrugged as he took a sip of his tea. “Maybe the fact that the adoption would completely remove any rights he has to her has sparked some deep buried paternal instinct...” “Bull shit.” Frank scoffed, leaning back in his chair. Greg looked at Fliss who took a deep breath.

“So, what happens now?” she asked, trying to keep calm. One of them had to have a level head after all.

“Well, there’ll be a little to-ing and fro-ing before court but my first action, which I did as soon as that letter landed this morning, was to get onto Child Welfare. They’ll prep a report on Mary, how settled she is, happy, basically in support of the adoption.” Greg licked his lips “But I want you both to know, that there is absolutely no way that Mary is gonna get taken away from you.” He looked at Frank straight in the eyes as Frank looked back. “Even if Polland petitions for custody, which he won’t…” he held his hand up, cutting Frank off before he could start again “No Court in their right mind is gonna rip her out of her home here and put her with him, not now. You have Legal Guardian Status Frank, that’s not gonna change. At most he will get visitation.”

“What if Mary doesn’t want to see him?” Fliss asked as Frank looked away, his eyes roving over the garden are which was light up by the various solar lights speckled around the decking and lawn, the pool lights turning the whole area to the left of the garden a vivid shade of aqua, desperately trying to keep his cool.

“Then the CWD will reflect that in their report.” Greg nodded. “But this is absolute worst case scenario. You both need to understand that there is a really, really high chance that the court will overrule his objection and allow the Adoption to go through anyway. She’s been with you all her life Frank, whilst he may have a biological link to her, he has nothing else. And the court won’t look favourably on his actions. We saw that in the case versus your mother.” “So this might actually not mean a thing?” Fliss looked at Greg.

“Exactly.” Greg smiled “You’re in a very good position. This…it’s just a little bump in the road.”

“Then why does it feel like a huge fucking road block?” Frank looked at Greg and his best friend sighed.

“Because you’re panicking.” Greg said simply “You’re over thinking it, like you always do. Trust me Frank, this is going to change nothing…” “How can you say that?” Frank looked at him. “Of course it’s gonna change something, that little girl up there thinks we’re gonna be adopting her and now I’m gonna haff to tell her that that might naht be the case…”

His accent grew thicker, the way it always did when he was emotional and Fliss squeezed his hand once more and turned to face him.

“Frank, nothing changes from our home front, that’s what Greg means.” She said, and Greg nodded in agreement. “And as for telling her, then we do what we always do. We be honest, we explain it simply and we reassure her if she gets anxious. That’s all we can do for now. And then, whatever happens we face it together as a family.” Frank sighed and looked down at his feet before he looked at Greg, shaking his head “Sorry man, I didn’t mean to snap.” “Don’t sweat it.” Greg shook his head “But I mean what I say pal, this isn’t like last time when, I’ll be honest, I didn’t think we had a cat in hells chance of keeping her from your mother, despite how much I was behind you, and you know that. This time, well, not only have your entire circumstances changed now in that she has a perfect home, a family, stability…” he took a deep breath, “And you are her legal guardian. No court will strip that from you unless there’s exceptional circumstances. And these are not. The only card Polland has to play is that he still has his Parental Rights, he’s got nothing else. He has never met her, never talked to her, never paid a dime towards her. In contrast, you on the other hand have a whole fucking hand of Aces to play back. There’s no way she’s going anywhere, adoption or not, which is the main thing here. That she stays with you. You two are her parents in everything but name and the court and CWD will see that.”

There was nothing much more that Greg could tell them at that point, other than to walk them through the next steps in a little more detail. He talked them through how the CWD would be in contact and that they’d want to speak to Mary alone, then they’d want to speak to both of them too, and that was as far as he was prepared to go, refusing to even think about anything beyond that. Which in itself was frustrating the hell out of Frank, but Fliss understood exactly why Greg was being so reserved. It was information overload, and Frank being the very analytical and cerebral person he was would end up even more frustrated as Greg would have no answer to the barrage of questions he was likely to have.

It was only when Alex made the familiar noises of hunger that the 3 of them called time on their discussion and Fliss stood up and headed to the bassinet to the side of the sofa. 

"He's getting so big." Greg beamed and Alex, momentarily forgetting his hunger, locked his eyes onto his godfather's and gave him a huge smile. "Hey fella!" Greg ran a finger down his cheek and Alex wiggled his arms in response. "He looks like you pal." Greg looked at Frank as he grinned. "Poor little bugger." 

“Fuck you.” Frank snorted, and Fliss pouted dramatically.

"I happen to think is daddy is very handsome." She looked at Frank whose lips curled into a smile at one side for what felt like the first time that day before he turned to Greg. 

"I'll see you out."

Greg looked at him and then nodded, and with a final goodbye to Fliss, he left the family room with Frank behind him

“Tell me honestly Greg, and no bullshit…” Frank looked ad his friend as they strode towards Greg’s silver benz which was parked behind Fliss’ Cherokee “Am I gonna lose her?”

“Have you just listened to a damned word I said Frank?” Greg looked at him. “Read my lips. Not a chance. Honestly Frank, you have the upper hand here. This is nothing like last time.”

Frank nodded and gave his friend a tight smile.

“Thanks for coming over.” he nodded and Greg smiled.

“Any time, I got your back. You know that.” he promised as he climbed into his car. Frank watched him leave, tossing a hand at the tailgate to the car before he turned and headed back inside, giving a whistle for Thor to follow him, the dog having wandered outside at the same time he had. But despite his friend’s assurances, he just couldn’t shake the worry from the back of his mind that this entire thing was going to rip their family apart.

He paused in the doorway and watched Fliss who was now feeding Alex his bottle, her eyes locked on that of their son and he felt a little lump in his throat. He swallowed and spoke, his voice sounding strangely far away to him.

“Want me to do that?” he asked. Fliss looked at him, immediately recognising his offer for what it actually was, a request. He wanted to do it. And she knew why. It was a way to keep himself grounded, away from the spiralling thoughts in his mind.

“Sure.” She nodded as Frank sat down. She handed Alex over and then kissed Frank’s cheek. “Try not to worry sweetheart, I know it’s a shitty set back but it’ll work out.”

“You’re optimistic.” Frank looked down at Alex as he took his milk before he glanced up at Fliss “I wish I was.”

“You heard Greg.” She gently lay her hand on his neck, her fingers softly stroking at his skin of the nape “This isn’t like last time.”

“I know.”  He nodded, before he fixed a smile on his face “Why don’t you go for that bath you were talking about before?”

“You gonna be ok?”

He nodded “Yeah, I’ll be up once he’s finished.”

“Ok.” Fliss nodded, kissing him again before she stood up and left Frank alone with his son.

**** Try as he might Frank couldn’t sleep that night, his mind was whirring at 100 miles an hour, and in the end he gave up before his tossing and turning disturbed either Fliss or Alex. He climbed out of bed, pulled on a pair of sweats and a t-shirt before he peered down at Alex who was asleep in his crib. As he headed to the door he reached down and gave Thor’s ears a scratch as the dog looked up from his spot in his basket before he padded silently into the hallway and softly pushed Mary’s bedroom door open. She too was fast asleep, Fred curled up next to her head on the pillow. She looked so peaceful, so content. And Frank knew that’s because she was. She was safe, she was loved, she was wanted- boy was she wanted- and the thought that her life, that their lives might be upturned by that shit head Polland made Frank’s stomach churn.

He knew he was over thinking things. He had always been the same. He retreated into his mind, and no matter how many times Fliss or Greg had told him not to worry that night he just couldn’t help it. He’d almost lost her once, and the thought that he might actually lose her for good this time was unbearable. His mouth suddenly became dry and he needed a drink, so closing the door behind him softly he headed down the stairs and pulled open the fridge, reaching for a bottle of water.

He the cool liquid in one but that did nothing to help the hot and clammy feeling that was now washing over him, causing a light beading of sweat to dust his brow. He wiped it away with the back of his hand and as he did so his belly dropped out from him and a sick feeling spread across his body, almost like he was going to puke. He gripped the edge of the counter, hovering over the sink, eyes closed as the room began to spin and his chest suddenly began to hurt. He found himself unable to catch his breath as his throat tightened and he scrunched his eyes shut as they were burning from the unshed, salty tears. Then, he could hold the feeling of desperation and panic no more and he turned, sliding to the floor in a dishevelled heap, his back banging painfully against the lower kitchen cabinets as he struggled to ground himself. When his chest finally released enough for him to take a huge, shaky, painful breath it was all too much and his anxiety poured out in a flood of uncontrollable tears, the deep emotions stirring with no other outlet but his silent crying.

How long he was there he had no idea, locked in his own mind and worries, but then a voice broke through the cloud in his mind and a familiar presence filled his senses.

“Frankie…” Fliss gently placed her hand on Frank’s shoulder as she knelt down next to him. “Oh Baby…”

He mumbled something incoherent, choking on his sobs, his face buried between his arms as they hugged his knees to his chest, and she moved to wrap her arms around him. His own arms moved and he wrapped them around her back, clinging to her with a desperation she’d never seen or felt from him before as he pressed his face into the crook of her shoulder.

“Shhhh, I got you…” she whispered to him, kissing his head. “I got you.”

The two of them sat on the kitchen floor, Fliss soothing him, pressing the odd kiss to his head, running her hand up his spine over his t-shirt with one hand, the fingers of the other fingers brushing the back of his neck, a movement she knew he found comforting. Knowing from her own experiences, there was nothing else to be done other than stay with him and let him cry it out she did just that. Eventually, she felt his broad shoulders begin to relax a little as his sobs turned into smaller cries, which then morphed into small hiccups, until eventually they subsided completely and there was no sound in the room bar his deep, ragged breathing. After a moment or so of relative quiet,  he pulled away and Fliss turned her head towards him, taking in his appearance and it broke her heart. His face was red and blotchy, those blue eyes she could drown in were bloodshot and looked at her sadly from beneath puffy eyelids. He moved his arm to wipe at his nose and then took a deep, stuttering breath.

“You with me?” Fliss asked gently and he nodded, taking another shaky breath.

“Sorry, I didn’t want to wake you.” He spoke, his throat felt raw and his voice was gruff and croaky, not sounding like his own. Fliss shook her head.

“Don’t you dare apologise Frank.” She said gently “There’s nothing to be sorry for.”

“We had such a wonderful Thanksgiving a few weeks ago, and we should be looking forward to Alex’s first Christmas and now…” “Hey, hey…” Fliss cut him off, her hands taking his face gently, pads of her fingers threading into his beard. “Thanksgiving was wonderful, because we were all together. Christmas is gonna be wonderful because we will still all be together.”

“I can’t lose her Liss, I can’t lose any of you, I just…” “And you’re not gonna.” She said, her voice calm and quiet. “Greg told you this before. The worst that can happen is Polland is gonna get visitations.” “But what if she wants to live with him? What if she-“ “Oh Frank.” Fliss sighed “That’s not even a remote possibility. Mary worships the ground you walk on. She adores Alex. She loves her home, her life…if anything, I think she’s going to refuse to even see him. You saw how heartbroken she was that day we had to talk her out of the bathroom during the court-case. She won’t have forgotten that.”

Frank raised his eyes to Fliss’ and she smiled at him softly, her hands still on his face “Baby, she might only be 9 but she’s not stupid. She knows you gave everything you had to make sure she’s had a good life. You kept her safe, loved. I’ll say it over and over till I’m blue in the face Frank, you ARE her father. In everything but biology. And Bill and I are proof here that biology doesn’t mean a fucking thing.”

“She adores you too you know.” Frank said, and Fliss smiled softly pressing her forehead to his

“Good because I adore her right back. And her big, soft, lump of an uncle-slash-father who happens to be a wonderful man with a huge heart, who knows he isn’t perfect but doesn’t try to be.” Her hands slid down from his face, one resting on his shoulder, the other back to stroking the nape of his neck. Frank closed his eyes, taking a deep breath as her touch washed over him. “A man who strives every day to be the best version of himself, but doesn’t really need to because he’s already the best daddy and partner in the world.”

“Liss I’m not-“ “You’re not perfect, yes I know.” She smiled “But that makes you perfect to me.”

Frank took a deep breath and closed his eyes as her fingers continued to gently stroke at his neck, all the time her movements sending gently sparks of warmth down his back. His breathing had settled down now, his tears stopped. He felt calmer.

“I love you.” He said softly and Fliss smiled, pulling back a little

“I know.” She looked at him “I love you too.”

His hand reached up for the one that was resting on his shoulder and his fingers tangled with hers, and he squeezed gently, relishing the feel of her engagement ring as it pressed against his middle and ring finger. And then, almost by magic, a soft gurgle came from the baby monitor on the side in the kitchen.

“See, Bean loves his daddy too.” Fliss smiled and Frank gave a little chuckle. “Wanna come back to bed?”

He nodded.

Fliss stood up and offered Frank her hand, tugging him up beside her. Without a word she led him down the hall and up the stairs. Frank headed straight to Alex who was on his back, his eyes flickering as he was clearly still sleepy, his head turned gently to the right, little hand curling by his cheek. Frank softly ran a finger over his soft skin and the little boy reacted to the touch, his limbs stretching a little before he settled back down, his breathing even, his eyes closing.

“I still don’t know how we made something so special.” Fliss whispered, her arms curling round Frank’s waist from behind.

“He’s part you.” Franks replied softly, and Fliss gave a chuckle.

“Yeah, well, like I said, his daddy’s pretty awesome too.” Frank turned round to face her and dropped a gentle kiss to her mouth, his nose sliding against hers before he gave a little yawn. “Sorry…” he said as Fliss chuckled.

“Come on Sailor, let’s try and get some sleep before he wakes us up.”

Frank moved and slid into the covers, settling down as Fliss led besides him. He turned onto his side to look at her and she brushed her hand through his untidy, fluffy hair and then opened her arms. With the air of a small child he sank into them, his head resting against her chest, arms moving so that they wrapped around her, like a koala bear. Her hand once more resumed its gentle stroking on his neck and it wasn’t long before Fliss felt his tense shoulders relax, his breathing grew even and she glanced down to see those long eyelashes resting against his freckled cheeks as he slept. She pressed a kiss to his head and closed her eyes and finally let her own emotion crash over her as she let out a few silent tears of her own.

***** “I just don’t get it Bonnie.” Fliss said gently, as Bonnie took the coffee she was offering, the two women heading over to the breakfast bar. “Why now? Why after so fucking long is he suddenly interested?”

“I wish I could answer that for you.” Bonnie sighed, as Fliss’ eyes flicked over to Mary who was led on the play-mat by the TV with Alex. He was led on his back and Mary was playing peek-a-boo with him, hiding her face behind his large stuffed Elephant pillow which had been a present from Steve and Sian when they’d taken the kids to the zoo.  Alex showing his appreciation by smiling at her and giggling, his arms and leg waving as he shrieked with happiness.

“I just can’t shake the feeling that there’s more to it.” Fliss bit her lip and Bonnie looked at her.

“What do you mean?”

“Well…” Fliss shifted a little, dropping her voice even more. “When Polland turned up in the Custody case, Frank was always adamant that Evelyn had paid him, even though he denied it and she denied it and we had no evidence. Frank’s still to this day 100% convinced that’s why he came forward. He wasn’t interested in Mary…”

“Has he asked Evelyn since?”

“No.” Fliss shook her head. “They’re in a good place. It’s not perfect but its ok, and they have this unspoken agreement now that they don’t talk about it. They moved on so…”

“Maybe you should ask her.” Bonnie said.

Fliss shrugged “I don’t know if I want to drag it all back up.”

“Yeah, but if you think someone is putting him up to this…”

“I don’t, well, I do, maybe…”  Fliss hesitated as she tried to put what she was thinking into words “I don’t know, what I think to be honest, other than there must be something else in it for Pollland. Sorry, I’m not making much sense.” “No, I get it.” Bonnie assured him. The two women sat in silence before Bonnie clicked her fingers as she looked at Fliss “Facebook. Have you checked him out?”

“Already tried, he’s blocked me and Frank…same on Instagram. Not that I’m sure it would help but…”

“Well he won’t have blocked me…” Bonnie shrugged “Might be a dead end but you never know. Worth a good old social media stalk, don’t you think?”

Fliss looked at Mary, then to Bonnie again before she nodded “Ok…do it.”

Bonnie pulled her phone out and scrolled down, tapping open the App. “What’s his name?”

“Polland.” Fliss said gently “Brad…”

Bonnie tapped at the screen and then turned it to Fliss, “That him?”

Fliss nodded. “Yeah…”

“Damned it his profile is locked down…” Bonnie said, her eyes roving over the screen. “Let me try his insta…” She continued to tap at her phone and grinned “Well he hasn’t locked this down…”she started to scroll down the screen and then stopped, frowning a little “Hang on…why do I recognise this woman?”

“Let me see?”

She pushed the phone over the counter and Fliss stared at it for a moment. It was a picture of Polland in a suit, with a team of people she assumed must be work colleagues. “Which one?”

“The one 2 down from him to his right.”

Fliss looked closer and then she felt her heart skip a beat. “I don’t fucking believe it…”

“What?”

“That’s Anna.” She said gently “Richard’s wife.” “Richard as in…” Bonnie trailed off as Fliss swallowed and looked at her.

“My ex brother in law. We saw them in Miami…” The realisation crashed over Fliss in a huge wave as she stared at the photo, the ghosts once again of her past back to haunt her only this time in a way she could never have imagined. This was the link, the Stazikers. She’d bet her life on it.

“Why now?” Bonnie asked gently “I mean this photo is from a few years back, so…” “I wasn’t with Frank when the case went down, not fully anyway.” Fliss said, biting her lip “None of them would have made the connection back then, they didn’t even know where I was. This will be their way of punishing me. John died whilst in prison for an attack on me, Richard did a few months inside too for his part. They’ve always blamed me, even when John pleaded guilty.” She took a deep breath and looked at Bonnie “Ok, can you go through and screen shot ANYTHING you see that links him to the Stazikers, then send it to me.” “What you gonna do?” Bonnie asked “Tell Frank?”

“Not yet.” Fliss said, “I need to speak to Evelyn first.”

“Why?”

“Because I’m gonna ask her once and for all if she paid Polland.” Fliss looked at Bonnie, her eyes blazing “Because if she did, it makes it all the more likely he’s taking a back hander again.” *****

“Fliss?” Evelyn’s voice hit Fliss’ ears as she sat in the study, sitting at the desk.  

“HI Evelyn.” Fliss said, taking a deep breath “Have you got a minute?”

“Yes, of course…what’s the matter?”

“I need to ask you something. And I want an honest answer. Bradley Polland…” “What about him?” Evelyn’s voice took a gruff turn.

“Did you pay him?”

“What?”

“When he appeared at Mary’s case. Did you pay him?”

“Why are you asking me this?”

“Because yesterday we had notification he’s actively contesting the Adoption application.” Fliss said, keeping her voice calm “And I’m trying to understand why. I have a theory but…”

“It’s nothing to do with me if that’s what you think…” “No, I don’t.” Fliss appeased as Evelyn’s voice was harsh. “I’m just trying to gather the facts before I go back to Greg. But I need to know honestly Evelyn, did you pay him.”

She sighed “Not exactly, no.” “Well what exactly did you do?”

“Polland works for an accountancy company.” Evelyn hesitated slightly before she continued “He’s in charge of their New Business department. I had a word with my contacts at the University and it ended up in a very lucrative deal for his firm, meaning he got a promotion. I’m not proud of it…but…”

Fliss took a deep breath. There was some satisfaction that her suspicion had been correct but also an underlying sense of frustration at how Evelyn could have ever been so damned sneaky. But, she had to remind herself that this was all in the past now. They had all moved on, and made some pretty monumental steps in that department. But this was now threatening to blow all of this out of the water.

“Thank you for being honest with me.” She replied after a second or two.

“Fliss, you have to understand, I was desperate.” Evelyn said gently. “I’d do anything to take it all back.”

“Look, I’m not interested in dragging this up for an argument.” Fliss shook her head as she spoke “As we all keep saying, what’s done is done. I just needed to know if I was right.” “You think someone is paying him to do this?”

“Yes.” Fliss said bluntly “And I have a good idea who.”

“Are you going to tell me?”

“Not yet.” Fliss licked her lips. “I need to talk to Frank first.”

“Ok, well if there’s anything I can do please let me know.”

“Of course, I’ll let you know.”

After bidding her mother-in-law goodbye, Fliss hung up and dropped the phone onto the desk before she let out a little groan and stood up, heading back into the living room. Mary looked up at her where she was sat on the sofa, and Fliss smiled as she saw Alex was curled up on-top of his comforter on the play-mat, cuddling to his beloved elephant.

“He fell asleep” Mary said, “I was watching him but you said not to try and lift him without you here so…” “It’s fine babe, he looks comfy enough.” Fliss smiled, “Honestly, you did good. Top babysitter.” She leaned over and gave the girl a hi-five before she took a quick photo and sent it to Frank. Placing her phone on the coffee table she dropped down besides Mary. “What you looking at?” Fliss nodded at the laptop.

“I’m chatting to Rosie.” Mary said, turning the Macbook so Fliss could she see had the instant messenger service from the school network open “We were talking about Christmas and stuff. She asked if I can go and sleep over tomorrow night.”

“You wanna?”

“Yeah.” “Then fine by me.” Fliss said, giving a little yawn “I can’t see Frank having a problem with it. I’m teaching in the afternoon so I can drop you either before or after.”

“Ok, I’ll tell her you said yes.” Mary smiled, “See what time she says I can go over. I can ride Monty in the morning again like I did today.”

“Sounds like plan, kiddo.” Fliss nodded “We can do the trail if you want when I’ve done the classes for the morning.”

“Awesome!” Mary grinned.

“Oh, and I know I said I was gonna make chicken parm for dinner but I seriously cannot be bothered. I’m thinking I might throw some frozen pizzas in and do some dirty fries instead.”

Mary grinned “I love dirty fries.” “So does Frank.” Fliss smiled

“He needs cheering up.” Mary nodded “He looked sad this morning.”

“He just has some stuff going on at work.” Fliss said, batting the question away “He’ll be fine.”

At that point her phone went off, it was a message back from the man in question responding to her photo of Alex.

Lucky little bastard!  I’d kill for a nap right now, I’m exhausted. Finishing early so should be home in an hour or so. Love you all xxx

“See.” She showed it to Mary “Just tired.”

“Can we bake some brownies?” Mary asked, her face hopeful “They always cheer him up.”

“Sure.” Fliss smiled, standing up, completely not bothering to point out to Mary that was more hassle than the chicken parm, it was such a thoughtful thing to want to do that Fliss instantly felt her heart melt as she agreed. “Go get the bowls and stuff ready, I’ll put Bean in the crib.” To be fair it only took half an hour to mix the batter and get it in the oven. They then turned their attention to the fries and pizzas, shoving those in too before they returned back to the sofa, Fliss finding “Miracle on 34th Street” on one of the channels so they settled down to watch, the Christmas tree lights twinkling in the corner of the room. And that was how Frank found them when he came in from work about 20 minutes or so later. Both of them sat on the sofa, Mary snuggled into Fliss as they were giggling at the TV in the now dim-light of the room.

“Hey.” He smiled and Fliss looked up at him, taking the kiss he offered before he ruffled Mary’s head “Again?” he nodded to the TV and Mary glared at him.

“It happens to be one of my favourites.” “Don’t I know it.” He rolled his eyes. He then paused, the smell of baking hitting his nostrils, and looked around, before he glanced back at them, grinning “You made brownies?”

“Not just any brownies…” Mary grinned “Salted caramel ones.” Frank groaned “I love you both.”

Mary sniggered “Fliss said you would say that.”

Frank smiled “Imma take a shower ok? Be down in a second.”

“Actually, I need to talk to you.” Fliss said, looking at him significantly.

“Ok.” He frowned.

“You ok here Mary?” Fliss looked at her. “Keep an eye on Alex for me again?”

“What are you going to talk about?”

“Nonya.” Frank looked at her.

“Nonya?” Mary frowned. “Who’s Nonya.”

“Nonya-business.” Frank retorted, straightening up as Mary gave a groan.

“That’s so lame.” she sighed, rolling her eyes. Fliss and Frank headed upstairs into their bedroom, where Fliss took a deep breath. She didn’t even bother telling Frank to stay calm, because she knew it was futile. And, true to her prediction, when she explained what she’d found out he reacted exactly how she had predicted. Angry, upset, frustrated. He grit his teeth, swore and then started stomping around the room.

“I know, I know…” she soothed as he slammed a drawer shut, tossing a pair of joggers onto the bed. “But, this is good Frank.” “Good, how is any of this good Lissy?” he seethed “I…” “Because it gives us an angle.” She said gently “If we tell Greg about this…whilst we may not have any solid proof it provides him with a line of attack. Raises questions. And we have Evelyn too, I’m pretty sure she’ll go on record about what went down last time. It’s a total smear on his character.”

Frank took a deep breath, running his hand through his hair. “You know what, I can’t…I can’t process this now, I need to think.”

“Ok.” Fliss said, looking down at the carpet, swallowing a little as she took a deep breath. “I’m sorry.” “Sorry?” Frank frowned “What are you sorry for?”

“Because this is my fault isn’t it?” she stated, more than asked, and Frank was horrified to see the tears in her eyes. “It’s all down to John, again.” “Stop.” Frank said firmly, shaking his head as he strode round the side of the bed to where she was stood. “Lissy, this isn’t your fault baby. Not at all. I’m not mad at you, I promise.”

“Maybe, but if I wasn’t involved, this wouldn’t be happening and…” she took a deep breath and Frank shook his head once more, wiping her tears away. “He’s fucking dead Frank and still…” “Look.” Frank sighed, “You don’t control what that shit head family do now any more than you did back then, ok? I’m sorry for snapping I just…” “I know.” She nodded, her hands wrapping around his wrists as his calloused fingers caressed her cheeks.

“But please don’t for one second think I blame you for any of this. This is down to him, and if the Stazikers are the only reason he’s doing this then he’s an even bigger shit head than we thought.”

“You know, Steeb says he can make him vanish.” Fliss shrugged “Concrete shoes, bottom of the ocean.”

Frank chuckled and his hands dropped to her hips “Don’t tempt me.”  

“So what do you want to do about it?” Fliss asked. Frank bit his lip for a moment as he considered his play and then he looked back at her, determination on his face.

“Once I’ve showered I’ll call Evelyn and check she’s ok, as no doubt she’s pacing the floor at home now, panicking.”

“You not mad at her?”

“Mad? I’m fucking raging but what’s the point of going over it all?” he sighed, “I always knew deep down she’d done something and we worked so hard to put it behind us…”

“And the rest of it?”

“Well after I speak to Mother, I’ll get onto Greg, tell him what we know.” He spoke determinedly “If the fucking cunts want a dirty fight, then they can have one.”

PART 2 

[vigilantegetawaydriver]

Definition Forbidden C1

Frank castle slightly x oc

word count: 2.1k

warnings : violence, other stuff, no smut I think there might be fluff

summary: Amy's adoptive sister and Frank only have one thing in common, and that's keeping Amy save. They don't get along really well.

Rose groaned as she sat up from the couch she`d been sleeping on, and was happy to see Frank hadn`t come back yet. She got up, quietly as not to wake Amy who was peacefully sleeping on the only bed the trailer had.

She made herself a cup of hot brew and ate this protein bar that was laying on the counter.

Then changed into her workout clothes and did some pushups, and pullups at the doorframe leading to the kitchen, all while trying not to be too loud.

As she was doing a set off pull ups she heard Franks voice from the outside, announcing his arrival.

She opened the door and told him to keep quiet , because of Amy , ignoring the fact that he was covered in blood beneath his jacket yet again. Frank let out a grunt as answer and made his way to the bathroom,

to probably tend to his wounds. Meanwhile Rose started doing her last set of push ups, while listening to the frustrated sounds Frank made.

She decided to ask if he needed help, so she went to the bathroom door and knocked :"You sound like you could use some help, I know we`re not exactly besties but yea I just want you to know Im here if you need help."

She waited a few seconds, Frank had gone totally silent since she had spoken. She was about go when the door to the bathroom opened. As she stepped inside she could see that Frank had taken off his shirt and was apparently trying to stitch up a nasty cut at his lower back.

She immediately reached for the wet cloth that was laying on the counter and the rubbing alcohol, and started cleaning his wound with it.

"How the fuck does that happen?" She asked while preparing to stitch the cut. "Didn`t wear my vest

and one of those fuckers jumped at me from behind." He flinched as she started stitching.

"He wouldn`t have gotten the jump at you if I had been there to back you up Castle." At that he visibly tensed "Yea right what would you have done? Shot him?

killed a man?" Now Rose was pissed too, at his total disregard of her abilities "You`re damn right I would have shot him, and you fucking know it, you know I`m a goddamn good sniper." He flinched as she angrily forced the needle to

go in. After a moment he said" Yea you keep tellin yourself that, and maybe it`s gonna happen, but I ain`t seen you shoot any weapon before kid." Rose kept her composure and responded passive aggressively

"Yea because you don`t just go off shooting at random things, and you just don`t want any help because you hope that you get killed right? So you can finally die, well let me tell you something Castle, I don`t like you I don`t give a shit

if you die or not, but if you do. And I hate to admit it , there won`t be anyone able to protect Amy like you do from what’s commin, so if you really care about her Castle, I suggest you stay alive. And don`t you ever call me Kid again."

At that he didn’t respond, she silently finished his stitching and put some bandages around his wound. Then she wordlessly cleaned and took care of all the minor injuries he wouldn`t been able to reach and left.

Well that was one nice conversation she thought as she took her bag and exited the trailer.

Frank still just sat there, thinking about what she had said, it had really gotten to him. The fact that she knew that he didn’t care whether he died or lived. But he forgot to tell her that he didn’t want her to die too, he didn’t want anyone else to get caught up in this mess, and as far as they knew there was no one looking for her, yet. He suddenly heard the door being shut and got out to find Rose was gone. “Damn it .” He uttered.

Rose was determined to get the guys that were after Amy, and so she did something she promised herself to never do again, but it was Amy , so she had to.

Later that day Rose returned , with a large sport bag contents unknown. She strode inside like on a mission and placed it on the table , ignoring Franks questions as to where shed been and what she had been doing.

She wordlessly opened the duffle and pulled out a long black box.

A weapons case, frank recognized.

“Hey what are you two up to?” Amy asked walking up to them from behind. “Amy I don’t want you to see this, could you please wait in the back?” Rose inquired.

“Like hell I am, I am sick of being shut out, and treated like a kid from the both of you. I am staying.”

“Fine, but don’t touch anything, you too castle!” Rose spoke with an annoyed undertone, as she opened the case, and revealed its contents a black Barrett M82.

“Where the hell did you get this?” Frank furiously inquired. “I took it with me when I left the army.” She answered calmly to release the tension. “Right , you have been deployed, you’re what 20 ? With a criminal background , when would that have happened?”

Rose let out an annoyed sigh at his disbelief and explained: “ I`m twenty one actually, I went to the army when I was eighteen , stayed till I was like nineteen and a half , I was a natural as sniper, was deployed for a few unimprtant missions, then they wanted to use me and a few other recruits as hitmen, I knew with what I knew they wouldn’t let me live if I refused their offer, so I took my shit and went AWOL. I had to disappear , after that I had to keep over water somehow, and so I did some jobs where I could put my special skills to use. It was extremely violent, and after a while I realized that I couldn’t keep doing it anymore all the things I did were just so wrong. So I searched myself a new kind of job, promising myself to never bring up my past again. I found these guys that were giving out jobs where you had to con people and it was pretty well paid that’s when I met Amy. That was about a year and a half ago.”

Amy had just been silently listening and suddenly uttered “ I thought you trusted me , and that we tell each other everything, and now I hear that you were a hitman , a mercenary?! So you lied to me about your past, and that’s how you were able to shoot a gun and beat up those guys that were after us once. Its like I don’t even know you anymore.”

Frank just silently watched, though it looked like he was contemplating something in his head.

“ Amy , you know I love you, you are like a sister to me, and I didn’t want you to know about this because its dangerous, there are still people looking for me and its dangerous for everyone who knows about this. And I tried to leave that part of my life behind, so I decided to never tell anyone , till now.”

“Yea its too dangerous, that’s what everyone keeps telling me , you know what you two , deserve each other, both keeping secrets and telling everyone its for their best ,but you-“ she was pointing at Rose “and especially you –“ now she pointed at Frank “ Are just psychopaths who like to find excuses for the awful things that you do.” With that Amy took her stuff, and went to exit the trailer. “Wow where do you think you are going.“ Frank suddenly inquired. “ Don’t even try to stop me , I am staying with Curtis, I am so sick of you too, but hey maybe you two can go on a murder spree together now. That’s what you do right?!” With a loud thud the door was slammed shut and Amy gone.

Rose wanted to go run after Amy, but Frank grabbed her arm and held her back “Don’t , she’s save with Curt , and you and me have to talk anyway.” Rose wriggled out of his hold and countered :” Oh we have nothing to talk about, the only thing we had in common , just left, I don’t owe you anything!”

She made her way to the table and started packing her stuff. Frank in the meantime phoned Curtis, about Amy.

Curtis told him that Amy had already called him and asked if she could stay with him, and that he was on his way to pick her up.

Now he turned to Rose, he watched her furiously trying to fit all her belongings in one small duffle, he would have never thought that she was ex military, but he had never seen her fight before too, except for when they first met ,she had pointed a gun at him and they had almost killed each other if it hadn’t been for Amy stepping in.

“I just talked to Curt , he is picking her up , she’s save now, you don’t need to worry about her kid.” Rose ignored him, but stopped packing and sat down burying her head in her hands.

She had realized that she wasn’t mad at Amy, or Frank, she was mad at herself, for burying up her past.

“Look just give her some time, she`ll come around sooner or later, you were just trying to protect her she`ll see that.” Frank spoke sitting down on the other end of the couch. Rose didn’t look up but mumbled :”I don’t think so, she hates me now, I messed it up again, she’s the only one I care about and now she hates me too. I should have never lied to her , I mean how could I keep this from her ?” Now it sounded like she was crying. “Look , kid. I – . I knew when I was deployed I signed up for this shady operation that wasn’t the normal kind of mission, hell I knew that this might affect me later in my life. That it might have some consequences when I`d come home. Even endanger my family. But I ignored those thoughts , I ignored all reason because I liked it, I always loved it. War all that shit. My wife knew , she told me herself that it was ok , that she loved me anyway.

But in the back of my head I knew , I always knew that I was and undoubtably am the reason they died. I had a choice, I could have signed out, lived a happy life, but I didn’t. What I wanna say is , you had the chance to get out, and you did, you are a good person Rose , and I don’t believe that Amy hates you for one second.”

Rose sighed “Yea , but I am just as bad, when I fled I could have gone under, really disappeared , but I didn’t I searched the fight I took jobs that were just as bad as the one they had offered me in the army. Back then I beat up guys just for the fun of it sometimes. I decided that I wanted to fight , and it didn’t matter if it was in the army , as private security, or something else. When I fled I noticed it that itch , the need for violence. Till I finally realized that it had to stop, that I had to stop.” She looked at him and when Frank didn’t answer she continued :” And keeping it from Amy was wrong, I should have told her who I really am, what I had done, but I just wanted to feel normal. But regardless of what I did , I never killed anyone. I beat them up, tortured even but I never killed, I didn’t want to go that far.”

Frank now regarded her and said:” You´re better than me kid, you haven’t crossed that line you still have a chance at normal. You were right trying to keep the past in the past and when this is over, you should take Amy and go start a new life, get a chance at normal.”

Rose regarded him for a moment before getting up and grabbing her bag “Thanks Castle, for keeping Amy save, and for the advice. I´m gonna go now, call me when Amy comes back.” She said laying a burner phone down next to him, before walking to the door.

“Castle you are probably the only one that’s able to give her the protection she needs, now , but I want you to know that when she’s save you don’t send her to me, my life never was normal and never will be. And don´t take this personally, but I hope we´ll never meet again.”

-And with that she left.

Authors Note: I hope this makes any sense at all

[halothenthehorns]

All in the Family

Chapter 129: The Department of Mysteries

Peter was not the only one who did a quick head count the moment they landed in a long, narrow aisle in the poorest of lighting and still sighed in relief to only see seven people moving about, if not counting themselves. Sirius had landed farthest away, sliding a bit into the shadows, but James moved instantly this time and caught him, pulling them all into a quick circle of relative safety and they all complied as they spied around.

It was exactly as the book had described, a great cathedral-sized room so large you couldn't see the walls or ceiling, with tiny little specks of dusty light the most pitiful of visible sources to give them exposure. The smallest of peeks around the corner showed endless rows of shelves, and they were on ninety-seven.

Their breathing sounded obnoxiously loud in the silence that followed. It should have been of some comfort no dead body had appeared this time, but it gave no one a single second of belief somebody wasn't going to come out of this dead, the most likely candidate the one amongst them. Peter had to crane his neck a bit, but finally he spotted the book resting on the shelf of objects, tiny little spun glass orbs each with a plaque underneath them. He frowned and turned slightly, now dead center in the group as everyone else kept looking around while he read:

S.P.T. to A.P.W.B.D.

Dark Lord and (?) Harry Potter

He opened, then closed his mouth. He really should point that out to James, but he was hoping to get out of here instead, and yet, what were the odds the book wasn't going to do the same?

Regulus finally turned away from the endless shadows around them to see the same. The two frowned uneasily at each other, but Regulus quietly summoned the book to him instead of saying anything too. The chapter title was inevitable, The Department of Mysteries.

James, Sirius, and Remus all flinched heavily as Regulus began, moving closer to each other but still not daring to leave the sanctity of this tiny little space that wasn't currently trying to kill them. You-Know-Who was not lurking around the corner waiting to kill them all, he was just as human as anyone no matter how much the maniac tried to pretend otherwise, he was not above such trivial descriptions.

It was still hard to keep that thought in mind as Harry just kept feeling the pain of his scar. The journey seemed to take ages, by the time the teenagers on their way here arrived the others were at least trying to force themselves to relax enough they weren't standing on the balls of their feet, ready to run or throw a curse at a moment's notice. Instead they were all starting to take a look around now at the details of this place, even if still nobody dared speak a word except Regulus trying to get them out of here.

Except Sirius. Despite James having one death grip on his arm and the other holding his wand quickly snatched back from Moony, he was still just a foot apart from everyone else as close together as they could, that cold expression still held in place, his resemblance to Regulus was more heightened than ever. He still had his wand at the ready, he tracked James carefully as he watched the book when Harry made it down to that long corridor without a single obstacle and his face was just as worried for his godson to be here as they were, but there was still something remote to it all, like a delayed reaction behind whatever he was really thinking.

Sirius was the most impulsive, brash person Peter was convinced he'd ever meet. The first time they'd ever passed each other in the corridor was leaving Potions and he'd been pushed out of the way onto the stairs, the arsehole snickering as he chased after James without looking back. Yet Peter had hovered, and hoped, and watched the two in fascination for how easily they knew the place in their very first week. It had taken him less than a month to discover people so easily overlooked him and the ready penchant for eavesdropping quickly developed.

They'd noticed him though. James had caught him at it, smiling and offering if he wanted to help them out with something while Sirius had rolled his eyes and huffed impatiently, muttering about they didn't need a little sneak around to pull this prank off. Peter had excelled though, giving extravagant and detailed information of who would be where when this took place so much so they'd never tried pulling a stunt without him keeping an eye out again.

Padfoot had still taken a bit to warm up to him, but eventually he'd stopped side-eying him in annoyance and instead started up the teasing. Little things that slowly got more elaborate as time went on. Joking threats he used just as readily on Snivellus as him, smacking him upside the head or even sending a curse if he thought Peter was particularly in the way that day. Peter never protested any of it, the feeling of inclusion and even having this attention from the most popular kids in school was all he could have asked for in his life.

It was also him though Sirius tended to ask first about Muggle things, they had a wide range of experiments back in their door from a cannibalized radio Sirius was trying to pick up Muggle tunes on to even a landline he was trying to get to work. It's not that he didn't have the option of asking Remus either, but the whole thing had started when Sirius asked him for something he couldn't find in his Muggle Studies book and it had all spiraled from there, but it was pretty much the only thing the two ever had fun doing that didn't involve the others.

It was Sirius who held down a student and force-fed him armadillo bile when someone else shoved him down a flight of stairs once. It was always Sirius first who had a retaliatory remark, spell or otherwise if he perceived the slightest threat to any of them. His inherently cruel nature only rarely tempered off by James's influence as he jumped in to help, but escalation of whatever Sirius had been tempted to do somehow always had them laughing rather than anybody really needing a trip to the hospital wing by the end.

Whatever indifference Sirius was trying so desperately to keep up for Harry searching room upon room for him, Peter had a bad feeling for who it was going to break on when Harry did find him. He rubbed ruefully at his nose and watched Regulus, for the first time considering not just being Sirius's outlet if he retaliated.

Harry and even his friends getting delayed in each room for one reason or another was starting to make them all twitchy and sick with stress, Peter started biting at his nails as the endless possibilities for why he hadn't come across anyone. He was half tempted to offer to change forms and have a poke around, maybe they were missing something by refusing to move away. Surely the greatest danger was You-Know-Who, and he couldn't be here.

Sirius finally moved, and as he spoke for the first time his voice cracked with worry as he watched James, "stay away from that."

James had finally noticed the little plaque with his son's name on it just as Harry reached this aisle and was inevitably fixing to do the same. James still had a grip on Sirius, but didn't even seem to hear him as he took a curious step forward, a look on his face Peter really didn't like. James only waited long enough to hear that Harry picked it up just fine before reaching to do the same.

"It's not worth it Prongs!" Sirius said instantly, switching it now so that he was holding onto him, he had hold of his dominant hand and wand, but couldn't reach the other, there were just too many people in the way and he'd swear the shelves were already trembling from their proximity.

"You can't tell me this is a coincidence? This thing's obviously important! I'm related to Harry! Surely that should count-"

"Don't!" Evans pleaded with him, reaching out on impulse and catching his other wrist, and on pure instinct he looked to meet her eyes, and she stared back without a single waver. "Listen to yourself Potter! This hasn't happened yet, and bloody hell knows what'll happen to you if you do this now when we still have a chance to stop it."

"This could be our only chance!" James insisted, trying to fight her off weakly without actually touching her, that would be too distracting right now. "We could stop all of this now if we just get this stupid thing Voldemort wants so bad!" Nobody flinched at the sound of the name. "This is our chance to fix it all!"

"What if you die right now," Sirius pleaded with him desperately. Evans still hadn't let go of his wrist, Sirius still had a firm hold on his arm, but James hadn't so much as looked away. "That Bode man ended up with Alice and Frank because he was forced to try and grab this!" Their jokes and laughter all from before as they'd interacted with the various, seemingly empty environments felt more like a haunted nightmare. Peter still had a chunk missing from his ear, Sirius himself still had the scars from his fight with Moony, James's fingers were still injured from back when all this began. If James touched that, who knew if the effects would be reversed. "If you end up like that James, Harry'll never even be born, this'll all be for nothing!"

James still looked desperately at it, that tiny little pinprick of light the only thing he could see.

Peter couldn't just listen this time though, if they couldn't talk him down then Peter was prepared to stun him to keep him from doing it, but then the shelves began to shake.

Regulus blanched and whipped back to reading faster than ever as the shelves around them began heaving and moving dangerously, a few tiny glass balls even began raining down around them, one coming so dangerously close to hitting Peter he felt the graze of it like a slap on the cheek as it crashed at his feet instead. The puff of smoke tried to solidify into an old bearded man saying something, but his voice was lost under Regulus's.

James was still trying to push the others off, his damnable need for action that had led all of them through their years in school pushing him to still try one last desperate attempt to reach for the little ball still in place as Regulus finished with the perilous sentence Harry's group finally had company.

[marauderspoet]

How i think the marauders spent Remus's birthday!

they woke up at 9.30 am which believe me was early for them Remus usually woke up around 7.00 so it took a lot of convincing on the marauders part to make him sleep in.

Sirius and James were the first ones to wake up. Of course they had to start the day of with pranking remus. They quickly opened their prank closet which basicly was a closet that they kept all their prank supplys in. They did have to sacrifice some space for their daily clothes for this but they were fine with it. They got out some loud sirens that they had bought three weeks prior and started screaming "happy birthday moony!!" while the sirens went of.

Remus woke up immedietly he was used to waking up to any little noise durning the night after all those years of transformations he was... paranoid, he was scared that he would hurt his friends,the only people that actually care about him.Well at least he thought but he didnt have to worry about this noise it was his friends.

He quickly woke up, "i- guys you didnt have to do this why did-" "Moony shut up" sirius interrupted "its your birthday now shut up and come with us"

They all got dressed and headed down stairs Remus was following the rest. They were walking torwards the great hall, tgey entered and Remus quickly spotted what was happening. The boys had kept a corner for remus and they had decorated it. Gosh he really loved them, the boys must have sensed his shock so they dragged him there. They sat down started eating and chatting, a couple minutes later Lily, Marlene, Alice and Dorcas decided to join them it was chaotic Marlene and Dorcas were cuddling while Marlene was arguing wıth sirius about who was better at skating, James and Lily were fighting over the Nutella jar and Peter was just chatting with Alice about Frank and how she had missed him, he was always at quidditch practice. All of a sudden sirius screamed " FOOD FIGHT" everyone was caught of guard but they went along with it. Even students from other desks were joining them now the whole great hall had joined them now. Remus wasn't someone that got in trouble ever so often but it was hella fun. They continued the fight untill Mc gonnagal and Dumbledore CAME and started screaming at people Sirius quickly sneaked them out and they were fine even tho they were pretty sure everyone knew they were the ones that started it. They were 8 people now and they had plans. "Okay Moony now we have a ton of things planned for today but for the first one get in the car" Sirius said. Remus was suprised but oh well they got in the car. Sirius was the first one to open some songs.They were all upbeat funk and except for him and Marlene no one really liked it so Remus took over and blasted the whole Folklore album (a/n also queen taylor im so proud she won album of the year wooo) he just loved the album and who could blame him? About 10 minutes before they arrived at the destination Marlene blindefolded remus so it was a suprise for him. The car stopped and they all got out guiding Remus. They entered the building and Remus immedietly understood where they were. The smell of buttery popcorn and sweat. They were at the rollerskating ring. Remus loved to skate. He used to skate when he was a little child and it just turned into a hobby. They all went up to the cashier and got their shoes. Remus and Marlene basicly ran to the ring. Sirius and James ran after and Lily Peter& Alice were pretty calm. They were just learning to skate while Remus was showing off to Marlene and Sirius and James were racing.

(something like this <3)

They skated in the rink for about an hour untill Sirius had a genious plan well.... they were probably gonna get in trouble but they didnt care. They were going to run out of the rink and skate.. well basicly they were going to steal the skates but they would bring them back.. right?

They didnt think much and just skated out the rink ignoring the shouts of the guy runing after them and eventually giving up. They blasted music from the speakers they had brought.

Remus took some photos of Marlene Dorcas,Lily and,Peter cause they practically begged him

⬆️Lily,Marlene,Dorcas Peter⬆️

After skating around the town for hours they all were tired so they decided to go eat in this little caffe that Lily had told them about that was also a arcade they put on normal shoes and made their way there. It wasn't too far away so they walked slowly chatting and laughing hard.

By the time they were standing in front of the caffe it was already 2pm. They entered the caffe and were blown away by how beautiful it was. There were colorfull lights everywhere with the smell of french fries surrounding the entire building.

They sat down at a nearby table and ordered a bunch of food to actually eat this time. They all warned Sirius not to make a mess this time. He was posted but not for long. The food arrived and they ate it in no time they didnt realise how hungry they were since they all were having a lot of fun. After eating and chatting they made their way to the back of the restaurant which was the arcade

They were like little kids running around getting tickets and playing games.

The time flew by as they played every game possible, Remus smashing everyone in Mario Cart. "NO MOONY STOP IT THIS IS RIGGED THERE IS NO WAY POSSIBLE THAT YOU JUST BEAT ME NO I REFUSE" Sirius was screaming getting looks from angry parents and eventually getting kicked out.

They all were laughing so hard as they left the building knowing damn well that they wouldn't be able to attend this place ever again. Remus thought that the day was over and he was so happy. The day had been perfect, he loved his friends and he couldnt have asked for anything better than this.

"now moony for our last activity go and put your swimsuit on" James told him and he must have seen the confusion on his face so he explained "we are going to swim in moonlight dumbass now quick get dressed!!" Remus was still confused but he went along with it. Everyone got dressed and they started racing torwards the ocean.The arcade caffe was right across the beach so they were lucky. Sirius and James were the first ones the jump in and start splashing everyone. They were complaning tho this was typical Sirius and James behaviour. Eventually everyone got used to the cold water and started having water fights, jokingly drowning each other, getting on top of each other.

They swam untill it was around 2 am and they did get many complains from the people around but they didnt care! Even the technically the day and Remus's birthday was over that didnt mean they would stop.

Lily and Peter quickly started a little fire while Marlene and Alice walked back to the car to get the marshmellows that Sirius had prepared beforehand. İt didnt take long for Lily and Peter to start the fire, with the use of some matches of course.

They got started with sticking their marshmellows on the sticks they brought when suddenly they felt water dripping on them, it was starting to rain, well they didnt really care and watched as the rain started to put out the fire. They grabbed their marshmellows and started running around town blasting the ablum melophobia by cage the elephant.

'maybe life wasn't that bad after all.'

~°•●○`~°•●○`~~°•●○`~°•●○`~~°•●`~

~°•●○`~°•●○`~~°•●○`~°•●○`~~°•●'~

hello everyone!! i cant belive how long this took me but its worth it, i just relate to these so much and my headcanons are literally me expressing my dream life at this point😔✋🏻 i really hope you all enjoy this make sure to follow me on instagram as well @marauders_poet on insta!!

(sorry for any spelling mistakes)

also listen to this song on repeat while reading its just perfection

love you all so much<3

[ninzied]

things you said when you were crying

for @fortysevenswrites. [ao3]

The first time Frank brings Karen over to the Liebermans’ for Friday night dinner, he could swear David’s eyes almost pop out of his goddamn skull. Sarah is more discreet – if you can call that discreet when she pours out twice as much wine for Frank and Karen, while leaving a more modest-sized glass for herself.

The kids, at least, act more normal about it.

Of course, there’s nothing normal, exactly, about how Frank had come into their lives. But in the last few months since he started coming over with some regularity, they’ve fallen into a routine that feels like the closest to normal – the closest to family – that Frank’s ever going to get.

And then, Karen.

He doesn’t know what he and Karen are. All he knows is what Karen means to him, and for now, that’s enough. The last thing he wants is to fuck it all up. There’s no rush – only that sensation of the floor bottoming out when she looks at him a certain way, or that slip of warmth in his chest when he says something that makes her laugh.

The Liebermans let him off the hook for a while. He doesn’t offer them any status updates, and they don’t pry either – much.

“Listen. Frank,” David says to him one Friday, as they’re unloading the dishwasher. Karen and Sarah are upstairs with the kids, picking out the evening’s activities. “As great as we are at board games, you know this doesn’t count as a double date until you ask her out on like a regular date, right?”

Frank picks up a particularly sharp-looking knife and makes a point of drying the edge. “You want to run that by me again?”

“Nope,” says David. “Not at all.”

The kids are rightfully curious about her, but seem satisfied enough when Frank first introduces her to them as “just an old friend of your Uncle Pete’s.”

Leo ends up being especially impressed with Karen’s board game prowess.

“Got a lot of practice growing up,” Karen explains to her over Risk one night. “I used to play with my younger brother too, just like you.”

“Cool,” beams Leo. “So how old’s your—”

But Frank clears his throat, and says something about ice cream if they want to take a peek in the freezer. They’re bouncing off into the kitchen faster than he can say mint chocolate chip, and he squeezes Karen’s arm for a second before getting up to join them.

Zach, on his part, seems to go selectively mute whenever Karen’s around. He gets more agitated than usual if a game isn’t going his way, and turns fire engine red whenever Karen offers some kind words of encouragement.

Zach, it appears, has a crush.

“Good,” is all Sarah has to say when Frank mentions his theory to her. “You could use the competition.”

“Get out of here,” he scowls, and doesn’t make the mistake of bringing it up again.

…

But it turns out Zach’s not the one in this family that Frank should’ve been watching out for.

It’s early June, just after school’s let out for the summer. David and Sarah have been making threats about moving their Friday night dinners down to the beach.

“I don’t do the beach,” says Frank.

“What Frank means,” Karen cuts smoothly in, “is that he only owns things that come in black hoodie sizes.”

“Easy enough to fix,” says Sarah, looking sly.

“My thoughts exactly.”

“Christ,” mutters Frank, just as Leo’s coming into the kitchen. “Hey, sweetheart. Want to go outside for a bit?”

“Sure!” says Leo, and runs to grab a ball.

Zach’s at some all boys’ camp for the week, so it’s just him and Leo in the front yard, kicking a soccer ball back and forth to each other. It’s not really his thing; he’d grown up with a football practically in his hands at all times, but Leo’s trying out for the team, she tells him, so he’s game for whatever.

As they’re kicking the ball around, she tells him about school, how her favorite classes had gone, what she’s looking forward to with starting a new grade in the fall.

She’s really come into her own this year, he thinks. She’s fierce, and feisty, and it’s maybe more than a little bit terrifying to him, just how much she’s grown.

He can’t look at her these days without thinking of Lisa, and how she would’ve been at this age. But it’s a welcome kind of pain, more of a tender ache in his chest than the thousand-pound weight that he’d gotten so used to carrying alone.

Now, he has the Liebermans. Now he has Karen, and—

Leo’s making a run for the ball when she steps wrong on her ankle – out of the corner of his eye, he sees it twist unnaturally, and then she’s going down with a cry, and Frank’s heart just about stops right there.

He’s by her side in half a second. There’s a rock in the grass that must have tripped up her footing, and he tosses it out of the way before reaching gently down for her ankle.

“It’s okay, shh, shh, shhh. Hey.”

There are actual fucking tears in her eyes, and Frank cannot handle seeing her in any kind of pain. If that rock had been human, he would’ve skinned the thing alive by now.

“It – really – hurts,” she hiccups.

“I know, sweetheart. I know.”

He carefully examines her ankle.

“Listen, you’re gonna be just fine, all right? Nothing’s broken – it looks like a small sprain. We’ll get some ice on it, once we’re back inside.”

He’s crouched down next to her, pulse still hammering up in his throat somewhere. He’s about to ask her if she wants to try putting some weight on it when he notices her looking up at him shrewdly.

He also notices that she’s no longer crying.

“While I have you here,” she says, in a very different tone, “I have a few questions for you.”

“Shoot,” says Frank, rocking back on his heels and trying to decide whether to laugh or shake his head and sigh. He’s probably going to regret this.

“So, you and your friend. Karen.”

Yeah, he’s definitely going to regret this.

“Are you two, like…hanging out?”

He scrubs a hand over his face and says, “Don’t know what you mean by that.”

“I’m fourteen, not four. I’m not stupid. I know what it looks like when two people—”

“Whoa, okay, okay,” says Frank. He stoops down lower so that they’re level with each other. “Don’t say anything that’s gonna make it hard for me to look your mom in the eye later.”

“Fair enough,” says Leo. Then, after a moment, “So if you’re not…hanging out, then what are you doing?”

Frank lets out a sigh. “Your mom and dad put you up to this?”

“Nope,” says Leo, looking smug. “They’d only wish they had.”

“Yeah, you got that right.”

Leo stretches her legs and gives an experimental roll of her injured ankle. “Just suck it up and buy a swimming suit, okay? It’s not that hard.”

“That so?” Frank muses. “Why does it matter so much to you, anyway?”

Leo shrugs. “When I grow up, I want to be just like Karen.”

“Yeah? I don’t blame you, kid.”

“And I want to be loved the way Dad loves Mom. Or the way that you…well, you know what I’m going to say.”

Frank pulls her into a hug, kissing the top of her head as she snuggles into him for a moment. “You will be, sweetheart. You will.” He ruffles her hair before pulling away. “So it was that obvious, huh.”

“Yep,” says Leo, matter-of-factly. “Well. Except to Zach. You should probably break the news to him, after.”

Frank glances up toward the house, and tries to imagine walking back in there, facing Karen like nothing has changed. For all the Liebermans’ endeavoring, it’s their fourteen-year-old daughter who’s going to be the one that refuses to let him off the hook.

“All right,” he says. “You ready?”

“Are you?”

“Smartass,” says Frank. “Don’t tell your parents I said that.”

Leo laughs. He helps her stand, and she puts a foot gingerly into the grass. “Oh, it’s totally fine now,” she says, and Frank shakes his head, retrieving the ball on their way back inside.

Leo goes to help her mom in the kitchen as Karen walks up to Frank with two cold beers in hand.

“Hey,” he says lowly.

Karen gives him a bemused sort of smile. “…Hey,” she says back. “Drink?”

Frank takes the bottle, just to have something to do with his hands. “Look, I was thinking about the, uh – the beach.”

She’s shaking her head. “Frank, it’s fine. I was only teasing earlier. If you don’t want to go—”

“Actually,” he says, “I was thinking maybe we could. Go. Just the two of us.”

Karen blinks at him, disbelieving. “You’re serious.” Her smile is slow-forming. A sunrise. “Okay. Yeah. Let’s do it.”

Frank feels his heart back up in his throat, for entirely different reasons this time. “Okay.” He holds her gaze a moment longer, and realizes he can’t stop smiling either.

Somewhere, there’s the sound of the table getting readied for dinner, and Karen touches his arm before going to help Sarah set up.

Leo catches his eye from across the kitchen and gives him a double thumbs up. She’s grinning from ear to ear, but schools her features into something more neutral as David walks in with a fresh plate of steaks off the grill.

“Here, Dad,” she says. “Let me get that for you, too.”

Jesus.

“Thanks, hon,” says David, none the wiser.

Frank takes a swig of his beer and goes to help man the grill for a while, wondering how to break the news to the Liebermans that they’ve been raising no less than a teenage assassin in their goddamn home.

[thehollowprince]

The way Mason Hewitt gets utterly erased by fandom, replaced by Theo to be Liam's friend and anchor. And I think one reason he's left out of fic so much is because as we've discussed he is basically Fanon!Stiles. And to have him around in a story with Fanon!Stiles would look suspicious because... they're the same, except Stiles is actually nothing like fanon. And they'd rather *die* than portray intimate scenes with Mason because they find Black people disgusting to be frank (pt. 1)

and I've seen it in every fandom. They gush about loving ~the gays~ but ignore canon gay/bi boys, esp if they're PoC. And it's all about straight yt boys boning, and what they get off on. And because they don't find Black or Brown ppl attractive, they get no love scenes. Mason was openly thirsting for Brett, but fandom was silent because "eww, canon Black gay expressing lust healthily?" And this is what we mean when white fangirls fetishize gay/bi male ships/dynamics (pt. 2)

And I touched on that yt fangirls will misappropriate progressive language when it suits their agenda. Like dismissing Scott as a "cishet yt boy" yet worshipping Stiles + Derek. And they often try to make that worship seem progressive by claiming Stiles or Derek are nonwhite/Jewish, or claiming werewolves are a allegorical oppressed group (no) yet ignore Scott is Brown *PLUS* he's a werewolf too, so they claim he's an intruder on ~werewolf culture~ and a colonizer (final)

You are not wrong in any aspect.

We've talked ad nauseam about the appropriation of mlm sexuality and giving it to the straight, white characters. And as you said, its almost exclusively the white fangirls who get off to two guys together rather in the same way that straight men get odd to lesbian porn. The fact that they don't see that they're just doing the very same thing that they hate men for doing is... well, sad is the first word that pops into my mind.

I know you don't watch any of the SKAM shows, but I experienced a similar problem over there. By far the most popular storyline across any of the remakes is the season three story, that being a closeted gay man coming to terms with his sexuality and embracing it rather than trying to suppress it. But the thing is, if you actually go through the tags, that's not the sense you get at all. Most of the people that watch these shows, or at the very least the ones who are the most vocal in the tags, are only focused on the romance in the story.

They didn't care the actual struggles of being in the closet and the journey that character has to go on to accept themselves. They just wanted to see two boys kissing. That became very apparent during the last remake to do that story, WTFOCK. They changed up the timeline and didn't introduce the love interest until the third episode, and those three weeks were just filled with constant complaints. This was further compounded when we saw the main character, Robbe, do what a lot of closeted young people do, and he tried to have a relationship with a girl, hoping that it would "make him normal". The tags were littered with homophobic jokes about how Robbe was "secretly straight" and it was extremely disheartening, especially from the fandom of a show that preached acceptance.

And you can't call them out on this behavior. I did and half the fandom blocked me because I, an actual gay man, wouldn't let a bunch of horny fangirls be the voice of a gay man's struggle. I was also bugged down with anons (similar to the one that's haunting my inbox right now) claiming that the reason they were so keen on the love interest showing up was because he was a "healthy representation of mental illness". Of course, they then went about proving how much they didn't actually care about that by spending the entire season trying to diagnose Sander at every opportunity, but the romanticizing of mental illness is another matter entirely.

To circle back to the point, we were given actual, healthy mlm representation on Teen Wolf, but fandom outright ignores it in favor of focusing on a non-existent relationship that was based entirely on negative stereotypes. But that's the crux of the matter, isn't it? They don't care how their behavior actually affects gay and bisexual men, so long as they get their own sexual satisfaction. You point out how having an adult and a minor in a relationship just reinforces the predatory gay pedophile stereotype that the Christian Far Right have tried to categorize us as for decades (if not longer) and they cry "it's just fiction!" But these same people talk about the stigma of unhealthy body types for women because the girls of these shows are skinny and petite while able to run marathons and fight of almost anything.

This is never more prominent than when they continously call for more LGBT representation, always mlm and never wlw, and then go out of their way to ignore that representation because it wasn't what they wanted (ie. completely thowing out their stories for Stiles and Derek and devoting everything to making them a couple, often at the expense of everything else.)

The term double-standards clearly means nothing to them.

And we could shout until our voices are gone about the racism in this fandom, but those who perpetuate it don't care enough to listen. They don't want to hear how them going out of their way to erase or put down Scott, the Latino lead of the show, at every opportunity is racist. They don't want to hear how them taking all of Scott's most prominent attributes (his compassion and loyalty and persistence) and giving them to Stiles to make him more palatable is racist. They don't want to hear how them completely ignoring the canon gay characters, who are also characters of color, in favor of taking straight characters and "turning them gay" is not only racist but homophobic.

They don't want to hear any of that. They want to live in their little fantasy world where everyone recognizes their genius and that they right all along. The real kicker is that I'd be more than happy to leave them alone in their own little world, but they refuse to be put out to pasture, hence the reason Athena is still jumping on pro-Scott posts, or that someone posted anti Scott content in the Scott McCall tag, or the ever present anon. They refuse to leave us alone so we have to rehash these same arguments over and over in the futile hopes that maybe this time it'll stick.

[mxliv-oftheendless]

Pretty

Yeeeeah, so my mind’s been going off about this random idea: what if Starchild was flirting with Velma during Scooby Doo and KISS instead of flirting with Daphne? Velma needs more love dang it. So naturally my dumb romantic self thought of this little thing. There might be more depending on what my mind thinks of. For now, enjoy this!

AU: When the gang and KISS split up Starchild goes with Velma instead of Daphne and Fred.

“I’m still suspicious,” Velma stated as they left the building. Was Starchild a little shaken? Maybe. But most of what Chikara had foretold to them were things they had faced before. He was a bit amused by Velma’s stubborn need to be skeptical.

“Chikara’s never wrong,” he responded. “Well, except the time she predicted the Love Gun album would go gold.” Dramatic pause. “Because it went PLATINUM!” He pumped his fists, grinning. “Whoa yeah!”

He waited for Velma’s response. It was only a roll of her eyes and “Good for you.” Then she walked off. “C’mon, let’s head back and make sure Shaggy and Scooby aren’t getting in any trouble.”

Starchild tilted his head a bit, then hurried to catch up with her.

What an interesting human Miss Velma Dinkley was. Her friend, Daphne, had wasted no time in literally hanging all over him ever since they first made their amazing dramatic entrance. But Velma had simply rolled her eyes in fond exasperation at her friend and given him no attention, save a polite greeting. She was shorter than Daphne—well, with his boots she was nearly a head shorter than him—and didn’t seem to care too much about her appearance. She was smart, able to put things together, and yet refused to believe everything she was being told was true. She also didn’t smile a lot.

Not that Starchild thought she would look prettier with a smile. She looked pretty already. He just wondered why she didn’t smile.

“It is a pretty big accomplishment,” Starchild informed her. “One million albums.” He still felt proud of that.

“I know,” Velma replied. “I know how albums are ranked. Gold for five hundred thousand copies, platinum for one million copies, multi-platinum for over two million, and diamond for ten million.”

Starchild blinked. “Huh.” He smiled at her. “You’re pretty smart.”

Velma shrugged. “I just retain useless facts. That’s not smart.”

“No, I said you’re pretty smart.” He grinned at her. “Pretty and smart.”

Velma’s shocked look was almost comical. Starchild kept grinning at her, waiting for her response. “… I mean I would say I’m smart… I wouldn’t know about pretty.”

Starchild’s grin almost dropped completely from his face in confusion. That usually worked. “Why not? You’re pretty.” He stated it like it was a scientific fact.

“Compared to Daphne? No, I’m not pretty.” Velma started walking again.

Starchild followed her. “Why don’t you think you’re pretty? You are.” He meant the words; her turtleneck with her short cropped hair and her glasses all came together in a look that was perfectly fitting for her.

Velma rolled her eyes again. “Right. Nice try.”

“Do you really not think you’re pretty?”

“If I really was pretty, I would get attention from guys who don’t turn out to be the culprits behind the mystery we’re trying to solve!” Velma suddenly snapped. Starchild stopped and blinked again at her, and her shoulders slumped and she sighed. “I’m sorry. It’s just… every time a guy gives me any sort of attention during a mystery we’re investigating, 9 times out of 10 they’re the one responsible.”

“That… can’t be true…” Starchild was trying to wrap his head around this. Was this actually true?

Velma shrugged. “Yep, it’s true. There was Gibby Norton, who tried to impress me with a ton of hair-brained schemes. Ben Ravencroft in Oakhaven, who tuned out to be a cuckoo. Ranger Knudson, who was unmasked as the Woodsman at Camp Little Moose. Windsor, who helped make a giant Phantasaur… the list goes on. Gibby and Knudson were guys I didn’t even like, but Windsor and Ben… I really liked them. Now all the guys who ever liked me are in prison, or anywhere else. So yeah, whenever a guy shows me any sort of attention, I tend to be a little cautious. Wouldn’t you?”

Starchild stared at her, speechless. Oh, sweetie… “I… I guess,” was all he could think of to say.

Velma nodded. “Exactly.” There was a pause. “Can we just head back now?”

She started walking off again. After a moment of thought, Starchild chased after her.

“Listen,” he said when he caught up with her, “you don’t have to base your worth on that, you know.”

“I don’t! I just… it would be nice if some guy with no strings attached thought I looked pretty.”

Starchild reached out and took her hand, and smiled at her when she looked up. “I think you look pretty,”

Now Velma was blinking at him. “… You do?”

“I do,” he said sincerely, remembering to pick his words carefully. Gods forbid he say the wrong thing and scare her off. “And it’s not just to throw you a bone or anything, I swear. I think you’re really pretty.” In spite of how confident he was, after being with quite a few women and men, his face couldn’t help but grow a little warm as he said the words.

“Oh…” Even in the night, from the lights illuminating the path he could see a pink blush coming to her face… and it looked really cute. She smiled, a little shyly at him. “Thanks… You’re not too bad-looking yourself.”

Starchild grinned. “Why, thank you, Velma.”

“You remember my name?” It seemed to have come out before she could stop herself, because she quickly backpedaled. “Sorry! I just… well you keep calling Fred “Frank” so I just thought…”

Starchild laughed and waved his hand as they resumed walking. “It’s all right. I know all your names. There’s you, Velma—which is a really nice name,” his smile widened when he saw Velma shyly glance away; he just couldn’t help himself. “There’s Scooby and Shaggy, Daphne, and then there’s Fred.”

Velma raised an eyebrow at him. “Did you know his actual name the whole time?”

“Maybe,” Starchild shrugged, smiling impishly at her.

“If you knew his name the whole time, why have you been calling him ‘Frank’?”

He couldn’t stop grinning at her. “Because it’s fun to mess with him.”

After a moment of her staring at him, Velma snorted and smiled—and my oh my was it a pretty smile. “Okay, you got me. It is a little fun to mess with Fred. His favorite band is the Ascot 5.”

He shrugged. “I’m indifferent to the Ascot 5. They’re good.”

“Not as good as you though, I’m guessing?”

“You know it,”

He hoped this was the beginning of something. A friendship, a relationship, whatever it would be; he would take what he would get with Miss Velma Dinkley.

[popatochisssp]

Purely because I can and because no one can stop me, the Diamond AU version of this post...

Sans (Undertale): Blue Diamond’s court is very relaxed and casual. Not many stand on ceremony and there’s a lot of free-floating Pearls and Sea Glass that don’t particularly belong to anyone and are just sort of snagged by whoever needs them and then dismissed when they’re done. You’re one such Sea Glass, plucked up at random by a bored Blue and told to do...whatever it is you do best, just go for it. You’re almost frozen by nerves for a moment, but you do your best to get over it and perform your talent for your Diamond...who promptly falls asleep. You spend a solid week thinking yourself a boring failure and awaiting a dismissive shattering, but the next time Blue Diamond picks out a gem to entertain him, he chooses you again. On purpose. Apparently, you’re not boring, you’re lulling, and there’s nothing your Diamond loves more than sleeping. You guess...you’ll take it???

Papyrus (Undertale): You’re at a gala hosted by the illustrious Orange Diamond... or at least, you’re supposed to be. It’s the first ever party he’s thrown and no one’s quite sure how to act, what to do, how much fun, precisely, is allowed to be had... Even the highest ranking aristocratic gems are uncertain wallflowers, to say nothing of the servants like you who have so much more to lose by accidentally offending. Orange Diamond doesn’t look particularly pleased by the hesitance either, though, or the feedback-loop of anxiety that seems to be causing in everyone else. You suppose it’s chance that in a sweep of the room, it’s your eyes he meets. He marches straight to you, his physical form lighting up and beginning to change, shrinking around his gem, and by the time he reaches you said gem fills up his entire rib-cage but he’s your size...holding a gentlemanly hand out to you and asking if you’d care to dance. You can’t possibly refuse-- and seeing a Diamond dance with a simple Sea Glass certainly sets a standard of what’s ‘allowed’ at one of Orange’s balls. It may be your first dance, but it’s far from the last.

Sky (Underswap Sans): Yellow Diamond is always so busy, poring over budgets and reports and communications from all the other Diamonds, answering all kinds of questions, figuring out what to do and how the best way to do it is... It’s complicated stuff, lots of moving pieces, but he stays on top of it, for the bright future of the Empire! He has Pearls to assist with the minutiae anyway, plus fellow Diamonds to consult for the big stuff and he figures that’s probably about all he needs. He’s not sure how to take it, though, when a gem in a mostly unnoticed menagerie pipes up one day, unprompted, that he looks tired. You certainly have his attention when you say as much and you only double down when he picks you up to see you better. As a Sea Glass, you insist, you have a good sense for these things-- when’s the last time he took a break? Well, he................ Huh. You’ve got him there and as soon as he realizes it, he starts to laugh. Yellow Diamond is a straight-shooter who appreciates your brand of frankness and he thinks that maybe you’re the kind of gem he ought to keep around...? He’s been looking for an excuse--any excuse-- to go visit some more of Homeworld’s gardens and arboretums and you may be just the little enabler he’s been looking for!

Paps (Underswap Papyrus): As far as Diamonds’ niches go, Green Diamond’s isn’t necessarily a glamorous one, but it’s one he’s proud of. Gems need working warp pads and well-maintained spires, after all, and maybe most in his position wouldn’t actually go check on the status of repairs personally, but... Well, even he wants to get up off his rear-end occasionally, and he finds it reminds the people that he’s around and invested, which is always good to do. He’s only cursorily looking things over on one such visit, half-listening to the Peridot reporting to him on the status of repairs when a much louder voice pulls his already distracted attention elsewhere... to you, a poor, frightened looking Sea Glass getting screamed at by your Malachite. He can’t quite figure out, from all the yelling, what it is you were supposed to have done wrong, but the longer he listens, the less he cares. Your Malachite looks utterly horrified when he makes his way over and they start apologizing profusely for the unseemly display, but he’s never been big on the whole punishment thing. He’d rather just...right the wrong. For you, that means being plucked up by a Diamond and settled on his shoulder, casual as anything as he announces, “this one’s mine, i’m takin’ ‘em.” So... you guess that makes you... Green Diamond’s now??? This is...probably going to take awhile to process...

Jasper (Underfell Sans): Red Diamond doesn’t have much of an entourage when it comes to non-combat-specialized gems. He’s always refused Pearls and cited the rough and tumble nature of fighting on the front lines to expand the empire as the reason he won’t even keep a harem of Sea Glass for entertainment. One Sea Glass is more than enough for him and that’s you, your Diamond’s tiny treasured favorite. You are utterly spoiled for your gem type and you know it, spending most of your days lounging on the small army of pillows he’s amassed around you to keep you safe, even if you should somehow poof. It would be easy to write yourself off as his pet... if you hadn’t seen firsthand how attentively he watches you when you perform for him, or the way he only really relaxes when he’s alone with you, stroking your back or telling you jokes or asking you to glow for him. As crazy as it seems, you’re pretty sure that Red Diamond’s heart is truly yours... and maybe someday, you’ll actually work up the courage to ask him if that’s true.

Pyre (Underfell Papyrus): Black Diamond has many Sea Glass and a handful of Pearls to attend him. You’re among their number and you’ve started to notice something. Something... upsetting. In public, all his other servants and entertainers seem to have free rein when it comes to his person-- they’re allowed to stand by his feet, to hop into his open palm, even to perch up on his shoulder! But not you. Whenever he sees you, you’re promptly picked up and held like a doll in his closed fist, forbidden to roam about or stand where you choose and you have no idea what that means. Does he...not trust you? Does he think you’re the type to run away? You certainly can’t do much to entertain, held like that, so does he...not want you to perform where others can see? Are you an embarrassment?! You spend a lot of time fretting about this, worrying yourself to be inadequate, before you finally understand it. Black Diamond’s brought you to a war meeting, holding you in his gently closed fist as always, and you watch a fusion of quartzes-- enough to be more than half the height of your Diamond himself--run in with urgent news. Carelessly, they run into a Sea Glass and you flinch to see the poor gem poof and then shatter under their feet... and when her owner starts to squawk in outrage, Black Diamond’s hand squeezes around you. “THAT’S WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU LEAVE PRECIOUS THINGS OUT TO BE TRAMPLED,” he says to quiet the other gem before demanding the update from the quartz. The war meeting continues on all around you, but protected there in your Diamond’s grip, his thumb idly stroking your hair... you start to feel warm.

Mal (Swapfell Sans): The gem who made you is not your master. You don’t know that you’d want the Ametrine with wild and unpleasant mood swings to be your master, but you also don’t particularly love your situation because you’re meant to be a gift for the luminous Purple Diamond...a gem who’s never once taken a Sea Glass and who only begrudgingly allows an assistant Pearl. The Ametrine seems confident that you’re well-made enough to be an exception, something that will win her a Diamond’s favor, but when the moment comes that you’re to be handed over... Purple Diamond hardly seems impressed with you. You kind of want to run and hide as he stares you down and the Ametrine just keeps talking about what a good gift you’ll be and how much you’ll enrich his life and you really just want her to shut up, but she won’t and you are genuinely starting to fear for your future at this point. And then Purple Diamond’s Pearl speaks up, saying... well, all manner of unkind things about you and how you’re unnecessary, just a knockoff, bootleg Pearl that is obviously not needed in the presence of the real thing. Apparently, this is your saving grace: as you come to find out later, Purple Diamond isn’t all that fond of his Pearl--mostly because he hates to be spoken for--and nothing in that moment made you quite so appealing as the opportunity to be contrary. He reaches down, offering his hand for you to step into as his Pearl sputters and protests and just like that, you are a Diamond’s Sea Glass, exactly as planned. ...You wonder how it’s going to pan out.

Rus (Swapfell Papyrus): You never expected to end up alone, on a colony-in-progress, standing over Violet Diamond’s gem. The organics were supposed to have been driven off and no one had thought they had the power to dissipate a quartz’s body, much less a Diamond’s. The rest of the entourage had already scattered, not wanting to stay and find out what these lifeforms could do to lesser gems if they could take down the most powerful among them. The Sea Glass like you, you could understand, but the soldiers and guards you cursed out vigorously for leaving you here alone, with organics closing in on you. You...probably should’ve run with the rest, but... Violet Diamond was always kind to you, holding you carefully and letting you rest in the hood of his cloak and showing you interesting and usually fuzzy things from each new world he explored... Those fond memories wouldn’t let you leave him defenseless, and even though you’re only one fragile Sea Glass, you find the strength somewhere in your gem to summon something to defend yourself with. Luck is on your side and you don’t have to fight for long, Purple Diamond and a whole host of troops arriving to drive back the little rebellion and all you can do is stand there shaking and clutching your rudimentary weapon. Violet Diamond reforms quickly and when Purple tells him what you did, he looks at you with...the softest and most sincere smile you’ve ever seen. “guess i know who my real friends are, huh?” he muses, scooping you up into his hand. It takes a lot of shushing and soothing before you can calm down, but he gets you there. You feel like there’s been a shift in your relationship, though...and it feels like a good one.

Slate (Horrortale Sans): You’re the first-- the prototype for a new kind of gem, a Sea Glass. You’ve gone through all the preliminary analyses and tests and now you’re being presented to Gray Diamond to decide if your type is viable. His expression is too hard for you to read as he looks down at you from his impressive height, asking quiet questions to your handlers about your cut and specs and purpose. You’ve never been more scared in all your four or five planet rotations than when he picks you up in his massive hand, using his other to carefully tug at your limbs and nudge your face this way and that to get a better look at all of you. “...cute,” seems to be his final judgment, and then looking you right in the eye, “woulda loved to’ve been there when you formed. bet it was a real sight to see.” It’s...it’s probably the most flattering thing anyone has ever said about you, and the fact that it’s your first compliment ever doesn’t cheapen it at all. You’re flattered, happy, and totally beyond your control, you start to do something you’ve never done before: you glow. It surprises everyone, most of all yourself, and Gray Diamond looks at you with one wide eye-socket, practically awed (which does not make your glowing problem lessen at all). “think i’ll hold onto this one,” he tells the engineers. “try ‘em out, see if we could use more.” There are many more Sea Glass made after you, but you’re the only one kept by Gray Diamond.

Papy (Horrortale Papyrus): You’re a cracked Sea Glass. If there’s one thing gems in your situation aren’t, it’s ‘in short supply,’ so you are only one of dozens sitting in Brown Diamond’s research facilities. Nobody’s ever really explained to you what they’re trying to do here and it’s never been your place to question, but neither are you stupid and you realize, sitting beneath all their scanners and nodes and experimental devices, that the technicians here are trying to fix you. You can’t imagine how beneficial that research would be to the Empire-- to more important gems than you, especially-- so you continue to comply with all the tests and treatments obediently, understanding your purpose as a guinea pig; the coal-mine-canary. Brown Diamond himself comes to speak to you one day and he’s kinder than you expected him to be, even shapeshifting himself smaller to talk to you easier. He seems unduly concerned with your comfort levels and you feel compelled to assure him that you don’t mind experiencing pain or unpleasantness if it’s to find out how to fix broken gems like you. He looks at you strangely, like you said something silly. “You Don’t Need To Be Fixed,” he says. “You’re Not Broken, Just Hurt.” And to your surprise, he goes on to say that you and the others like you aren’t expendable in all this research, like you’d thought-- in fact, everything stops if it looks like a treatment may hurt you or damage your gem any worse than it already is, no matter how promising it is otherwise. “I Want To Help Gems Here,” he explains, “Not Hurt Them,” and just like that, in that one moment of moving empathy... you think you may have a crush on a Diamond. Much as you’d very much like to not be cracked anymore, you hope that it takes the scientists a long time to figure out this healing thing, so you can see him a lot more often...

[solange-lol]

not so typical love song - ch. 6/13

Chapter Title: Oogum Boogum Song

Words: 1,711

Art by @lizzybizzyo! <3

[ one | two | three | four | five | six | seven | eight (coming soon)]

read on ao3

—

The moment Nico got home from school that Wednesday, finally ready to be off for the long weekend for Thanksgiving, he could tell something was different.

For one thing, his father was actually home (per his car in the driveway.) And there were actually voices coming from the kitchen that greeted him, rather than the typical cold, empty silence.

Which could only mean one thing…

Nico’s eyes lit up the moment he stepped into the kitchen. “Bianca!”

His sister looked up from the conversation she was having with their father and Persephone. She immediately jumped up from the table, and Nico dropped his bag, practically running over to greet her.

The moment they hugged Nico realized how much he missed her. Life had been hectic, and as much as Blue may provide some sort of sense to his world, it felt amazing to have physical comfort again,

It almost made Nico want to tell Bianca about all he’s been through.

He stored that thought away for later, instead focusing on being here in the moment with his sister.

“I can’t believe you’re home,” he mumbled into her shoulder. (It wasn’t fair that she was 5’9 while he was stuck at 5'4.)

Bianca pulled back. “You didn’t really think I’d miss Thanksgiving, did you?”

“No! I’m just surprised you’re home so early! I thought you would be flying in the morning of.”

“Nope,” Bianca smiled, leading him over to the dining table where their parents still sat. “I got done with classes yesterday, so I took the day to get my stuff together, and then took a train this morning.”

“You took the train?” Nico asked, bewildered. “But that’s like… an eight hour trip”

Bianca shrugged. “Airline security during the holidays from now until the New Year is horrible. I didn’t really feel like waiting hours in line, so I thought I would just suck it up and make it easier on myself.” She paused before changing the subject. “Now, where’s that sister of ours?”

Nico smiled. “Probably getting a ride home from Frank.”

Bianca raised an eyebrow, a matching smile spreading across her face. “Ah, yes. The infamous Frank.” Nico and Bianca tried to call each other once a week whenever Bianca was free to talk, and during those calls, Nico did his best to catch her up on what was going on at home. “Will I ever get to meet this boy?”

Nico shrugged. “Dunno. None of us have met him yet. Maybe you’ll be our lucky charm.”

As if on cue, they heard the door shut, and Hazel walked in. “Bianca!”

A near-identical greeting to Nico’s ensued, and soon the five of them were sitting in the family room, drinking hot chocolate together as they caught Bianca up on everything Nico had missed during their phone calls. 

“So tell me about this Frank,” Bianca smiled, crossing her legs and giving Hazel a look over the top of her mug as she took another sip. 

Hazel immediately flushed, curls bouncing as she shook her head. “I told you guys, he’s just a friend. But, um, we are going to the homecoming dance together,” she said, more to her mug than to her family. 

Bianca smiled calmly. She opened her mouth to say something, but Nico cut her off.

“What?”

When Hazel and Bianca both gave him a warning look, he took a deep breath and tried again. “You didn’t tell me that.”

“Yeah, because I knew I wouldn’t hear the end of it!” Hazel retorted, causing Bianca to giggle while Nico huffed. Persephone and just watched amusedly from the side, and even their father had the hint of a smile on his face.

“Speaking of homecoming, who are you bringing, Neeks?” Bianca asked, elbowing him with a sly smile.

“Oh, um. Nobody, I don’t think. I mean, I’m going with friends but not, like, with a date.” 

He wasn’t lying; he really did only plan on going with friends. It was tradition by that point for his group to go to the dance together unless somebody got asked, and even then they usually just included their date in the group. Plus, even if Nico did have a date, he doubted he would really fit Bianca’s expectations. 

What she said next just confirmed his suspicion. “Why not? Are girls not lining up to ask you out? I thought people were into the whole edgy and mysterious thing nowadays.”

Nico scuffed his toe on the carpet. “Haha, uh, yeah. Not exactly,” he said, refusing to make eye contact with anyone. Because I’m gay. GAY!

Maybe coming out to Bianca this week wasn’t the best idea…

—

Nico excused himself to his room later that night after a game of monopoly, despite his sister’s many attempts.

“We could watch Titanic?”  Hazel offered, but Nico just shook his head. While it was one of their shared favorite movies, (especially Nico’s), he wasn't exactly in the mood. 

Also, he didn’t really feel like explaining tonight that the reason he loved it so much was because of a young Leonardo DiCaprio.

He wanted to ask Blue how the coming out process with his family was going, maybe even get a few pointers. However, when he opened his laptop that night, Nico was surprised to see an email already waiting for him. And judging by the subject line, Nico wasn’t sure what he was supposed to expect as he clicked on it.  

From:  blue0919@gmail.com

To: bettertoburn@gmail.com

Date: Nov 27 at 5:41 PM

Subject: This might be a lot to take in

I’ve had such a weird day. So much happened I can’t even tell if it's real, and what’s good or bad about it. 

When I got home from school yesterday, both of my parents were there. As in, my mom and my actual birth father. I haven’t seen my dad since I was 4 years old. He stopped sending me birthday money when I was about 10. I sort of assumed he was dead.

Apparently, he’s not dead, though, and he and my mom were just sitting there like he hasn’t been ignoring us for the past 12 years of my life. 

And get this: there were two other kids there. Apparently, I have siblings (and the worst part is, my mom told me later that I might have more. I could have 10 siblings and I wouldn’t even know. My father is a manwhore, apparently.)

The room was dead silent and I just had to sit there awkwardly with these two other kids and listen to them explain the situation. Apparently, my mom is adopting them because my father isn’t fit to take care of them. He essentially guilted her into it because he’s a deadbeat and my mom is the kindest person you’ll ever meet. 

Anyway, after an excruciating hour of small talk, they excused us. Except my house is small and it’s quiet, and when they started arguing we just sat silently on the staircase. They didn’t even last a whole minute before they were screaming at each other. We could hear every word. 

Imagine being stuck with two people you’ve never met but are apparently related to. I felt trapped at the top of this staircase, just sitting between the wall and the railing as they watched me. I honestly felt like banging my head on the wall a few hundred times until it broke through, but they both already seemed so scared. 

Anyway, they’re moving in a little before the holiday break, which means I need to get to know them well enough soon so I can get them gifts for Hannukah. (If they grew up celebrating Christmas… well I don’t know what to do then).  My half-sister (that’s so weird to say) is a freshman, and my half-brother is a sophomore. I don’t know a thing about either of them but after the holiday break, they’re coming to CHS. I’m being completely honest here, Angel, I don’t know how I feel about it yet. 

My dad wants to take me out to dinner or something before he disappears forever, and I honestly don’t know what to do. I wasn’t expecting any of this. 

I’m so lost, Angel. If anyone can find some sort of humor in this, it’s you. Or just distract me. You’re good at that too.

Love,

Blue

Nico felt like he was looking at a weird, distorted mirror, like something you would find in a funhouse. Who knew Blue would have such a similar situation to something Nico had dealt with years prior?

He knew that this would have come out sooner or later the more they went in detail about their lives, so biting the bullet, he started to type.

From: bettertoburn@gmail.com

To: blue0919@gmail.com

Date: Nov 27 at 7:45 PM

Subject: Re: This might be a lot to take in

You probably won’t believe this, Blue, but I’ve been through something similar. 

Remember when I mentioned my half-sister and how it wasn’t a long story I was interested in getting into? Yeah, apparently when my mom died (I was maybe two years old at the time) my dad had some interesting coping mechanisms. And 12 years later after her mom died, suddenly I’m being told that I have another sister. Not exactly something you’d expect to hear at 13 years old.

But, I learned to love her. She’s my sister through and through.

You know me, Blue. I’m not one for pep talks, and I’m not saying it’s going to be easy. It wasn’t for me. Nor will I say I understand, because frankly, there’s no way I can understand what you’re feeling completely. You’re not crazy for feeling the way you do.

I’m here to support you. If anyone can get through this, it’s you.

(That’s really cheesy and unhelpful) (But also true)

Love,

Angel

Nico let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding once he sent it. It was sort of scary how much he was willing to risk just to comfort Blue, but it felt worth it. 

He would do anything for Blue.

Now if only they could work up the courage to reveal their identities before someone did it for them.

[cyanidefilledcandy]

So, gonna be talking about some sensitive stuff right now...

I am extremely and beyond frustrated right now.

So, the other day, I made a mistake a butt-dialed my sister’s phone while I was at work. (Note: I work overnight.) Later that day, I get a call back from her. I was planning on telling her I made a mistake and whatnot, but instead, a guy answers with a “Who is this?”

This is one of my BIGGEST pet peeves. Do NOT call MY phone and ask me “Who is this?” Regardless of if I called first or what, you don’t have to be rude. I’ve had people mistakenly call me before. And so, I would call back like “Hey. How are you? I got a message or call from this phone. May I ask who this is.” Like, it’s not hard to not be a fucking asshole. So, I responded with “Who is this?!” And they got quiet before hanging up. 

At first, I’m wondering if her phone got stolen, so I call my mom to find out. But, before she even picks up, it dons on me that maybe it was her baby daddy, and naturally, I’m wondering why he has her phone and I immediately land on the answer. If it was indeed him, he probably thought I was some guy or something stupid, if my sister didn’t have my number saved. So, I call my mom who confirms that her phone wasn’t stolen to her knowledge. Then we call my sister and my mom hangs up. 

I asked my sister if he had her phone and at first she’s like “No. We don’t go through each other’s phones like that” because I do have her old number in my phone and never deleted it. Then she adds “I reckon...” That gives me pause. And then she informs me that her phone has been deleting numbers and contacts, etc. (which thinking about it now, I’m starting to have suspicions about...) I’m boiling, one because I hate being hung up on and two, I’m starting to see shady shit. Going through someone’s phone, especially when they are not around is WAY overstepping a boundary. And two, why the fuck would he have her phone when she’s at work alone without a car, and WORSE, I would find out...

So, my sister says she’ll check with him and I tell her to warn him to never hang up in my face again. She gives a little nervous laugh and I let her get back to work. I start to message him and tell him myself that I don’t care how he treats other women, including my sister, he’s GOING to respect me, but hold off on it. (Though, I’m still considering it.) 

Fast forward to today, I talk to my mom who asks me had I heard from her and if she was alright, which I did. She video called last night. Long story short, my mom was babysitting my niece yesterday and didn’t have any food, so she asked my sister if she could go and get the card from BD, which....

My sister tells her that he’s at the job he supposedly lost months ago (they both seem to have forgotten she already said he “lost” the job). So, my mom drives there only to be informed that he doesn’t work for them anymore (big shock). My sister then tells my mom that he works in a different department and...

ALSO, not only does he apparently have her phone and her food stamp card, but also has her BANK card, and.... I’m so pissed and over this situation.

This guy has never been any amount of good. He doesn’t work. Has a car he never lets my sister use. Doesn’t even watch his own kid (or spend time with her from what I’ve seen and heard). Used their kid to claim her on her taxes, which he didn’t tell anyone about and didn’t give my sister OR the kid a cent. And acts like he’s SUCH an important part of my sister’s life and that she would just be LOST without him. Again, he doesn’t work at all and my sister has family out the ass she can go to. My sister got her apartment. She and my family furnished her apartment completely. This guy didn’t do shit. She doesn’t NEED him at all. 

At first, I thought the dude was just a deadbeat, but now I’m starting to see he’s an abuser. Even before then, my sister wanted to move up here to make a better life for she and my niece and he whined that “she was taking his daughter from him”. Honestly, I should’ve seen the signs early on. But, now it’s so blatantly obvious and I’m just not at all here for it.

I know exactly where this is going and if she doesn’t get out now, it’s going to get to a point where she will not be able to. But, I also know that abuse victims absolutely will not leave their partners no matter how bad things get until they’re ready for it. And my sister’s smart. I know she sees what’s going on. At first, I thought she was afraid of her child growing up without her parents in the same household because she knows how my parents’ divorce affected her. Now, I’m starting to wonder if she might be afraid. She’s kicked him out twice and he’s sobbed to get her to take him back, but still... The guy is HUGE, so maybe she really is...even though my mom and her husband live less than 5 minutes away from her and my mom’s husband, even through his bullshit, does think of us, my sister especially, as his daughters and is pretty street hard, so....he’d fight for her. My mom would kill for her. My mom literally stabbed someone in the head for yelling with my sister in the room. (Note, this person was not yelling AT my sister...just with her in the room....and my mom stabbed her....in the head...) My dad and most of his siblings are ex military, he, at least, is armed and very over protective. (It took me three whole days for me to talk him down from killing the people who attacked me.) And then there’s me...

I’ve always been protective of my sister and I’m honestly at a point in my life where....I just don’t care. 

So, speaking of that....when she calls me tonight and i make sure the phone is in her hands and he’s not around, I’m just going to be frank with her. Again, I’m at a point in my life where I don’t care to tiptoe around people’s feelings. I don’t care to bullshit. I’m going to tell her straight up that this is abusive behavior and she needs to get out NOW. Because it’s only going to escalate from here and it’s going to get to a point where either she can’t escape or he’s going to kill her or my niece (which God and Satan and every other deity in the universe help him if he does). If she wants to leave and she’s scared to, all she has to do is say the word. She doesn’t have to say or pack anything. I will be down there to get her and her baby and drive them back up here. If she’s scared he’ll hurt my mom, my mom can come with us. Hell, she’s not doing anything in that shitty town anyway except for being miserable. We can go back at a later date with my dad and we’ll pack up all of their stuff and get a storage room until we can do better. 

God in Heaven knows I want to leave this fucking state, but if it comes to the point where we have to get an apartment here, then so fucking be it. And if that motherfucker even LOOKS like he wants to do something, I will light his ass up like a house during Christmas.

Again....I’m at the point now where I don’t care... I hesitated to kill the fuckers who attacked me because I didn’t want my stepmom to come home to find her daughter dead. Because I loved my stepmom more than I hated her bitch daughter (and believe me when I say that is saying a LOT, and not just because of what they did to me). Lo and behold, they’re still here today and out of jail to abuse their children for another decade. I also once had a friend tell me that, though I had the desire, I didn’t really have it in me to kill someone when my sister was seeing a pedophile. I think he was right...back then. I swear....that hesitation is not there anymore. Even right now, it’s taking everything in me not to just borrow some money from my friend, head down there now, and put several bullets in him right now. Literally everything in me. And I don’t give a fuck if my sister and niece hate me for the rest of their lives. I really, really don’t. I love them more than I hate him, true enough, but that’s exactly why I won’t hesitate to put that fucker down....because I know in the end, they’ll be better off. The world would be better off. And I know I’m not God and I have no right to make that decision, but if the alternative is my sister and niece wind up hurt or dead, then oh well. I’ll go to Hell for that...

It’s funny....I had a dream when my niece was first born that my niece got killed, he was responsible for it, and my sister was in denial about the whole thing. I chalked it to just a crazy dream, but....

But, anyway, I’m going to lay it on the table for my sister. I know she’s not going to want to hear it. She’s going to get pissed off. She’ll ignore it. She may even hate me. But, it’s going to drive me insane if I don’t at least say my piece. (And yes. I will tell her to make sure she deletes it when she’s done reading; I’m not an idiot.) But, maybe if the seed is there, and maybe if I remind her that she does indeed have options, then she’ll wisen up before it’s too late. Maybe not now....but before it’s too late. 

Sorry for the length (to anyone who actually read this until the end), but I just had to get this all out. Again, I’m so pissed and frustrated and holding back the urge to commit murder without probable cause, so I feel like I’m going to explode, and I want to just kill myself because I can’t handle the idea of my sister and niece being hurt, or the fact that my sister is smarter than this and that she likely won’t listen to what I have to say and.....I’m just tired. I’m tired of the world.

People act like it’s so hard to just be decent fucking people and then the ones who refuse to listen to reason and keep themselves in a shitty situation, and I’m just tired of caring about people more than they care about themselves. And I’m tired of caring about everything so deeply and being powerless to do anything about anything and I just have no idea what to do with these pent up feelings right now, other than violence (either against someone else or against myself). I’ve tried drawing, but that didn’t help. Maybe this blog will at least calm me down to the point where I don’t feel so impulsively and manically violent, though....

[miastideclock]

ink.

part eleven

a fifteen part SocialMedia!AU featuring Bang Chan of Stray Kids. started: august 18th, 2019 completed: august 27th, 2019

lower-case intended.

"your uncle bernie says hi. but while i have you here, what was that post on instagram a few days ago? where you were dancing with someone at the beach at sunset?" viennas mother spoke through the phone, questioning her daughter about her confusion.

they had chatted on the phone for a few hours now, and vienna had thought that if her mother didn't bring it up in the very beginning, then she wouldn't be bringing it up at all, but thats how wrong one can be.

"oh that, me and a few friends spent the night at the beach and watched the sunrise. one of them asked me to dance with him when we listened to some music, nothing special." vienna spoke, trying her best to convince her mother that it was nothing but friendly. "i don't know vienna, it looked pretty romantic. are you sure you're not breaking your rule?"

ruth ahn had always supported her daughter in everything, all except her rule. no matter how many times she tried to tell vienna that her father was nothing more than a dick-wad who could burn in hell, and that she one day would find true love, vienna refused to listen. but what vienna had decided against telling her mother, was that she was starting to question the rule herself. it had come as a shock to vienna herself too, but she couldn't help it. a few of her friends had noticed it too, not that they knew about her rule, but they had noticed her lingering gaze and smiling eyes whenever he entered a room. how she seemed to speak extra clearly when they had a conversation, or that she touched his arm a tiny bit more than the others. it was the little things.

"mom," vienna dragged out as if her mother was embarrassing her. "its fine. i'm not gonna break my rule."

not long after they bid their goodbyes and hung up, vienna letting out a sigh as they did so. it was early in the morning, and she had decided against going to her classes today as they were only repetition lectures. that meant she had the whole day off, so she decided she could do some house work. it wasn't that her house was a complete mess as she tried to keep it clean since she kept getting surprise visits, but it could definitely be scrubbed and washed.

it had been five weeks since she first met the boys, and she couldn't be happier. even if they were a little annoying at times, they were still her best friends. but a day or two without them couldn't hurt, so she decided against telling them she had the day off, wanting to be productive instead.

just as she walked to the laundry room to get washing supplies to clean the living room, her phone went off in a call. she smiled at the contact name and slid the green button across the screen to pick it up. "hey chan." she said and plugged her earphones into the phone so she could use her hands while talking. he greeted her back and asked her what she was doing. they spoke about the most useless of things, but also slightly deeper topics, like most of their conversations went. they could talk about anything and everything, or nothing at all.

vienna didn't notice how long they had been speaking until she realized she had washed and scrubbed her entire apartment clean, done the laundry, cleaned the windows and emptied out her fridge and pantries for expired foods. she had also taken out the trash and changed the sand in franks litter-box. she fished her phone out of her pocket and saw that the call-time was at four and a half hours, shocked at what she saw. she mentioned it for the guy on the other line who didn't believe her until he saw it himself.

"how about i come over instead since we have so much to talk about? i can bring lunch, you must be starving after cleaning so much. maybe i even can bring my sketching pad?" he suggested. as if on cue, viennas stomach rumbled loud enough for chan to hear it through the phone, making them both laugh. she agreed to let him over, so they hung up after he explained he would be there in half an hour.

as she was placing all the buckets and soap back into the laundry room, she passed by a mirror almost screaming at the sight. if she was having any visitors, she needed to clean herself up too, not just the apartment.

she ran through the shower and dried her hair, throwing on clothing that was actually clean. as she was done, there was a buzz at her intercom. she hurried over and buzzed him in, and a few minutes later she unlocked the door so he could just walk in when he came up. while she was getting some soft drinks out from the fridge, she heard the squeak of the door open and close.

"so do you wanna watch a movie? i just read-"

"vienna."

"and it's supposed to be really freaking-"

"vienna!"

"because of brad pitt or something, i don't-"

"VIENNA!"

the girls finally shut up as she heard chan stop her. she pulled her head out of the fridge and looked over at the boy, but much to her confusion, he wasn't alone. next to him stood and elderly korean man, his hands behind his back and his glasses at the tip of his nose. vienna felt her whole self grow cold as a lump grew in her stomach. she looked over at chan, her voice low as he questioned him of what that man was doing in her apartment.

"he was outside and he looked confused, so i asked him, and he said he was looking for you. at first i didn't trust him, but he had a picture in his wallet of you as a child and he explained that he was your dad, so i-" chan explained with a smile on his lips, not realizing what he had done.

"get him out." vienna spoke to chan, refusing to talk to the man next to him. chans face dropped into one of confusion, not moving to get the man out, but standing his ground. "vienna, what are you talking about? it's your dad-" he started, but he was cut off.

"that man is not my father. that man stopped being my father when he left me and my mother to 'get some milk'." vienna spoke in a tone that seemed almost happy, chuckling a little bit as she spoke of the reason he left. the man next to chan seemed ashamed. not because he left his wife and daughter, but because chan heard what he had done.

just seeing him reminded vienna of why she made herself that rule in the first place. just when she thought she might have drifted a bit away from it. she realized she had to be even more strict with herself.

"get out. both of you."

part zero

part one

part two

part three

part four

part five

part six

part seven

part eight

part nine

part ten

part eleven

part twelve

part thirteen

part fourteen

part fiffteen

-bentley

[interestsofabookwormbitch]

Review

Ok, I've had time to collect my thoughts, and now I shall review my opinions on ASOTM. This will obviously have spoilers for the fic, and also, I didn't take any notes, so this won't be professional.

First of all I want to say I don't how well the representation is, and I will never be able to say that because I myself am mentally...sound? Not quite healthy, but good enough. Anyway, I did read through the comments on AO3, and the only mentally ill people to comment that I seen had said it was really good. I also do not want to really discuss this point with anyone who is neurotypical and completely unaffected by the issues of the story. Sorry, but your opinion on the matter is likely based of off your own assumptions, and I don't want to base my own opinion off of that.

Now that that's out of the way

I fucking loved it. I also fucking hated it. It fucking destroyed me. Like I said in another post, I wrote depressed poem because of it. So I guess I'm saying it gets a 10/10 on emotional investement. Seriously, it had me fucking bawling for half an hour, and I had it on my mind all day today. I just, I still feel it in my heart. You know how your heart feels heavier for some reason when something is above the normal amount of upsetting? Maybe that's just a me thing. Anyway, that's how I felt all day when I would think about it. I think that's a sign of genius fucking writing.

Honestly the writing was so fucking amazing. I felt so many emotions just from how it was written. Some lines that should have been cheesy weren't, and the descriptions. Like, I haven't been afraid of needles for a long time now (an incident from grade 7), but that blood work scene made me squirm (of course because of the ship it was kind of from cuteness too). Or when Bert and Gerard fought. I do have a squeamishness to blood, and I don't know how or why, but how she wrote made me picture bleeding more vividly than anything else I've read.

Also, this was written in first person. That's fucking hard to do. And, being 100% honest, is usually pretty cringy in fanfiction. But it was executed fan-fucking-tastically. Like, the story would not have been nearly as good written in third person. It was just amazing.

Gerard's whole inner monologues were usually pretty good too. And I only say usually because I don't want to say the ones that made me tear up were good (they were, but I refuse to acknowledge that). Also, his illness did feel real. I sympathised so fucking much. And there were times when he was getting better. He'd stop refusing treatement, but then something would happen. Fuck, I feel like if he could have stayed at Bluestone he might have actually healed now. Might have gotten better, but I don't even know. I don't even fucking know if they were real or not. Sometimes it seemed like they really were. But he could have gotten better. He was smart, he was good. He just needed someone looking out for him. Someone to convince him.

I'm fucking crying again. Fuck me. Fuck me and this fucking story. I need to move on. Fuck.

Ok, let's go to Frank. His characterization felt so real to me. Like he was slowly being healed, slowly getting better. It took time, and that was realistic. He went to court at the end. He testifies. I'm so proud. I'm so fucking proud.

Fuck. I'm back to fucking crying. This point on will a fucking mess. My thoughts are scattering because of my pain.

Frank and Gerard. Fuck this will be the death of me. I need to get it out of the fucking way. It was amazing to watch. It grew and bloomed so beautifully. So naturally. It was bumpy at times, but it was real. It was so fucking real. Gerard fixed Frank like he set out to do, and I feel like if they were given the proper time Frank could have helped fix Gerard too. But it was too late. They didn't even get a real fucking good bye. Fuck me. That hallucination of Frank. Fuck fuck fuck. I can't. I'm literally writing my thoughts as they come now. But fuck. Why couldn't Frank have actually said it? Why didn't he get to? It kills me. It fucking kills me. And how protective Gerard was of him. Everything that was going wrong Gerard would try and fix. And he did. Despite his mental state he saved Frank. Fuck I don't even like smut that much, but even that was fucking perfect. The struggles. The care. They loved each other. And I can't fucking deal with this shit.

Let's move on to Mikey. Fucking Mikey. I'm fucking crying harder now. Poor fucking Mikey. Poor poor Mikey. He didn't deserve that, and Gerard didn't mean to. It was all a tragic fucking accident. But their both gone now. Both of them are fucking gone.

The really shitty thing is, since I don't completely know if they are real or not, I don't know if Gerard got to go to an afterlife. Usually I believe there is one. I'm not religious, but I believe that. Usually I can comfort myself and say everyone meets there eventually. Except I can't say that. This really is fucking with my head. If they are real then they wouldn t let move on. Fuck if that epilogue wasn t written how it was then I wouldn t be so unsure. But it was written that way. It fucking was, and it fucked with me real good. Real fucking good.

I did love Markman though. I first I thought I'd hate her. Thought she was bitch, but was really trying. She really fucking tried. She tried. But she couldn't save him. If only he listened and took his pills. Fuck.

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. This isn't going well at all. I promise I fucking loved this story to bits. I really did. Really do. But it tore my fucking heart out and fucking carved it shreds. Fuck.

At least Ray and Bob were pure. They were the only purely happy things about the fic. Everything else makes me want to fucking cry thinking about.

But everything in it makes me want to reread. Why the fuck am I like this? Fuck. I cried harder over this than Endgame. 100%. Fuck me.

Overall I'll give it 9.5/10. Anything that makes me cry so much deserves a good rating. Only really downside is a fucking open fucking ending. Fuck are they real or not? I need to fucking know.

Also:

This is how much I cried just writing the review. I'm gonna go read something happy now. I need it. Like, I really fucking need it.

[padfootwritings-blog]

Alive again - Sirius Black

Summary: Six months after the school ends, Sirius and his friends haven’t heard about their best friend Y/N Y/L/N except that she was fine and alive from Dumbledore until one day Sirius is sent to a Order mission and he wasn’t sure if he was dreaming that his pair was Y/N as he arrived. When they come back to the Order’s headquarters, they try to put an end or a new beginning to their story as she explains what happened.

Warnings: bad words; mentions of sex, death and blood

Note: I think I was overexcited with this idea and when I finished I realized how long this oneshot is but really hope you like as much as I did. Sorry any mistakes!!

Y/S/N: your sister’s name

Y/B/N: your brother’s name

Y/F/N: your father’s name

Arms crossed and shoulder resting at the doorway, Sirius Black was staring at the front door while people were passing by to enter the room where the meeting was about to start, behind him, just as he did at the past six months. The place became quiet after Lily whispered his name near his ear before sitting by James’ side, holding his hand under the table. In one last hope, Sirius blinkered and turned his ankles to sit in the head of the table, where Dumbledore was sitting in the opposite side.

A heavy hand squeezed his left shoulder and the grey eyes met Alastor “Mad Eye” Moody. “She’s not coming.” He said before starting to talk about Alice and Frank Longbottom’s informations from what they found about being aurors. Sirius stopped listening after this like many times before, his shaking fingers intertwined on the table and his gaze lost at some muggle tattoos on his forearms.

“Sirius?”

He faced the oldest man in front of him noticing everybody’s look on him, Moody’s magic blue eye rolling all over the place while the other was almost killing him waiting for him to answer Dumbledore.

Remus let out a sight under his breath and Lily pressed her fingers on his shoulders in affection then looked at James, who was staring Zac Donnelly knowing the auror would scream at Sirius response since he was not paying any attention at all, wondering if she should hold her wand if her fiancé showed that he would attack the men over the table.

Remus, Peter and Lily didn’t like the auror in the moment he entered the Order’s headquarter three months ago, but Sirius and James’ feelings about Zac were infinitely bigger than just not liking him and the feeling was mutual.

“Yes?”

“Bloody hell, wake the fuck up, Black!”

The chair under Sirius fell on the floor as he suddenly stood up, fists pressing the table and his furrowed eyebrows made his look a thousand times deeper and Zac stood up too, already pointing his wand right at Sirius nose. Before anyone could say something or Lily has to hold James down as he was prepared to help his best friend, Mad Eye grabbed Zac by the collar of his coat and Dumbledore patiently walked to James and Lily.

“Enough.” Said facing the youngst auror and putting his hands at the couple, looking to Sirius through his half-moon spectacles, “We have the information that maybe two or three Death Eaters will be in London tomorrow morning to their own mission. Your pair will be already there so don’t be late. And do everything is told you to do, don’t worry and don’t do anything stupid. Everything is part of the plan.”

Sirius response was like a yelp when he answered loudly at the corridor, “Won’t do.”

— ♡ —

The familiar crack from the apparition filled Y/N’s ears as she was holding tightly her wand and staring at two men dressed with black clothes aggressively talking to someone at her grandmother’s doorway. She looked behind her shoulder to find Sirius walking to a spot where he could see everything without being seen.

Her throat quickly seemed to close, her chest felt like it was crashed a million times non-stopped and vision blurred by the tears filling her eyes – that was the way she felt for the last six months every time she saw her friends through a window, a door half opened or heard their voice echoing the place she was, but never been seen by them, specially when it was Sirius voice she was hearing or his handsome face she was looking at. Almost letting the sob scape from her lips Y/N rolled her eyes back at her grandmother’s house as she heard her oldest sister’s voice.

The girl joined the Death Eaters after the tallest men walked down the four steps and as aggressively as the man where talking to her before, pushed the sleeve of her coat and showed her forearm at them then pointed back to the door that was still open now with a tall boy looking irritated at the adults on the sidewalk.

Y/N recognized the graphite grey suit from her father that her fifteen year old brother was wearing and blocked her eyesight closing firmly her eyelids – the mission had failed. Y/N’s youngest brother was a Death Eater just as the rest of her family was, not including her.

Y/N placed back her wand in her clothes and made her way to the scene, pointing a finger at Sirius direction without looking at him in a silence ask to him stay where he was.

Sirius understood what the lady asked not knowing who she was. Everything is part of the plan. From where he was he would never discover being able only to look at her back and the high Y/H/C ponytail swinging at the shoulders of her leather jacket.

For the first time in a year, Y/N’s family were facing her. The other men wasn’t a Death Eater but Fenrir Greyback, the werewolf who transformed one of her best friends Remus Lupin when he was just a child.

“Should’ve known this place is stinking like this because of you.”

“Actually it became worst when you arrived, but I think you are already familiar by it after all those years so you couldn’t know it belongs to you.” Y/N pointed to her sister and father and watched by the corner of her eyes her brother’s approach, wand right at her chest.

Fenrir Greyback was staring at her so badly that she knew he was thinking about all the ways he could kill her just using his werewolf teeth.

“Don’t you dare talking to your si- to her like that, you filthy blood traitor!”

“Don’t worry we won’t be talking at all. I just came to let you now that a few aurors are on their way and that a two or three Order’s members are hidding in the corner right now.”

Y/N pointed where Sirius was hidding and run away to the backyard of the house as the street was becoming a mess. Spells and cracks everywhere; Y/S/N waving her wand against Mad Eye the same time Greyback was trying to attack him, Y/F/N quickly ran to Sirius, who fired a spell when he stood up. Y/B/N came after his sister, who didn’t seem to be anywhere.

Sirius dueled with the men only recognizing him when he was lying unconscious on the floor. He was Y/N’s father. He tied Y/F/N with rubes came from his wand and ran to help an auror he didn’t know and Frank Longbottom with Greyback. But before Sirius could help the werewolf apparated when saw Y/S/N unconscious like her father after being hit by Y/N.

When her Y/E/C eyes met the grey ones from Sirius’, her body flew in the air and hit the fence. She tried to raise but fell again on the grass, “Crucio!”

“I deal with him. Take Y/N and get the hell out of here!” Mad Eye screamed the time Y/B/N fired another Unforgiving Curse at his sister. Y/N couldn’t say where the pain started, it radiated her entire body. Then stopped with a scream and she wasn’t facing the sidewalk anymore but a blur of Sirius face. Not saying anything he helped her sit in a chair and kneeled in front of her, cupping the girl’s bleeding face with hurt fingers. If it was a dream he didn’t want to wake up.

“How do you feel?”

“I’m fine, don’t worry. You can go and take care of yourself, you’re pretty much as bad as I am.”

“I’m not going anywhere until you are completely fine-“

“I said I’m fine!” Screamed at Sirius, looking deeply to his eyes. He screamed back, “Lucky arse you’ve gotten then, because I’m not! You went to Godric’s knows where and disappeared for six fucking months and all Dumbledore and Moody said was that you were fine and alive.”

“Because I was! I- am.”

He stepped back and she put herself up.

“To hell with alive and fine! I spent every night waiting you cross that fucking door back to me, where I knew where were you and that you were safe, not out there-“ His words died in his mouth. Y/N blinked.

“I was in a mission! Not ‘out there’ enjoying the summer break!”

“For six bloody months?”

“Yes, congratulations you have the ability to count! Unfortunately you don’t seem to be able to remember things, like we broke up the day we left Hogwarts.”

“It doesn’t mean I can’t wait and stop loving you.”

Silence.

“You shouldn’t have made this.”

“What?” Sirius asked with furrowed eyebrows, “Wait you?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

They didn’t say anything for awhile, Sirius staring her while she was looking at something behind his head and opened her mouth two times before having courage to explain everything.

“My sister got the mark in the Easter of our sixth year. In the middle of the summer me and my mom were kicked out of the house by my father because we refused to join them. We couldn’t understand how they did it to our family. Dad always said he and mom despised everything that their families believed, the blood status and specially all our relatives who were becoming Death Eaters. Y/S/N was dating a muggleborn since she left Hogwarts, five years ago. They were getting married next fall and they broke up one day before she, well- Y/B/N promised me he wouldn’t join them for anything in this world, and I said I would come back to take him to live with me and mom. We stayed with my grandma until seventh year started, and one week before we were going back Dumbledore said they found my grandma’s body in the kitchen and my mom was missing.” Y/N lifted her arm at his direction so he stayed where he was and she could finish, “I told what happened with my father and my sister to him and he thought that I could somehow stop them recruiting more pureblood families to You-Know-Who’s side or give in halfbloods and muggleborns. When we arrived at King’s Cross, I went to my old house and my brother was helping me all the time since I left. He helped me stay hidding in the house, telling me everything he knew and heard. Until I met Zac Donnelley, the son of my aunt’s friend. He was sent there by Dumbledore to keep an eye at my family and my brother and pretended he was by their side, mocking off the Order and doing everything my family prized. Zac discovered they were planing to ask if Y/B/N wanted the mark and if he doesn’t then he would end up like my grandma and… my mom.”

Sirius couldn’t stayed anymore where he was when Y/N started to cry and her knees barely sustained her weight. Holding her waist, he made her body lays against his and her fingers grabbed the fabric of the boy’s shirt. For what felt like forever Sirius gave delicate kisses at the crown of her head and like she was finally back to him.

Then suddenly pushed him away.

“No” Y/N voice trembled, “We can’t.”

Sirius didn’t ask anything. By the way he was facing her, Y/N knew he had understood what happened next.

“I was at almost every mission you, James, Lily, Peter and Remus were, but you never saw me. I saw you one time, you were screaming at Peter to get Lily back to headquarters and I knew there was at least three Deaths Eaters there. I got rid of two and for a second we didn’t see each other, just because I had to go. I had to stay hide, my brother was betraying me all the time and was a matter of time to they find out I left again to my grandmas’s house and… Zac was helping me. With everything. We had a meeting at a muggle’s pub in London so we could meet formally before going to my family’s house. There a random guy asked if I could dance with him. And there I was, dancing with a stranger that was actually my bodyguard and someone who… made me feel alive again sometimes.”

His face was still the same beside his eyes, the little gleam that revived there since he saw Y/N obliterated with her last six words. Mind spinning around, he didn’t know how to react – he only knew he had the right to say everything he needed to say, and was her time to listen.

“Good to know I was just a school distraction to you, someone that you could fuck with in every way until you find yourself the knight that would save you from everything and you two live the fucking fairy tale the fucked up one here wasn’t able to give to you.”

“You know that’s not true! It’s not like this and you know it, don’t be an arsehole!”

“Now I’m the arsehole? Really?” He laughed and didn’t let her answer “What’s like then if it isn’t in that way?”

Letting tears fall from her eyes, Y/N just faced Sirius asking herself if she should punch him in the face or just left and never speak to him again.

“Blimey! Don’t answer, I don’t care. Just tell me, I have the right to know. Are you still fucking with him?”

She shook her head.

“Do you love him?”

Again, shook her head.

“It’s only you. It was always you.” Muttered wondering if he heard.

“Fuck it.”

Sirius kissed her, ignoring all the pain in his body and the seconds she tried to let go of him until she was kissing him back. And for the first time in months she really felt alive again. Y/N felt like she was melting at his touch, her heart beating so fast in her chest like it was the first time beating at all.

“I’m sorry, Y/N, but I don’t want to and won’t leave you again. Ever. I’m staying by your side no matter what for the rest of our lives or at least I stop breathing. I love you so freacking much and seeing you hurt physically and mentally this way is killing me and you liking it or not I’m taking care of you. You can scream and shout and kick me and hex me but I won’t leave.” His hands slipped from her arms to her cheeks, affectionately wiping her eyes with his thumbs, “Understand?”

Y/N nodded and smiled through her tears, finally letting all the pain, tiredness and all messy feelings take her body as it were laying against the love of her life who was holding her in his arms again knowing she would heal there.

[halothenthehorns]

All in the Family

Chapter 83: The Egg and the Eye

They really should have enjoyed those other landings while they hand the chance, as every one of them groaned in painful misery upon impact in the most uncomfortable way possible across hard, cold tile floors. Peter got the worst of it, he landed with an echoing bang upon copper pipes that left the walls themselves vibrating as he finally came to a stop face down in the bathtub beneath.

"Everyone still alive?" James called miserably, rubbing at his head and staring blearily around, but his vision wasn't coming back into focus.

"More or less," Sirius answered as he began looking around for Prongs' glasses.

Remus peeked over the edge to see Peter curling onto his side now, whimpering in pain, several fresh bruises likely to come of it. He hopped down and offered him a comforting pat on the shoulder while performing a minor healing charm to at least help take the edge off the worst of the pain, allowing him to sit upright at least.

Lily had gotten it the easiest, landing on the wooden towel rack and knocking the whole thing over, now tangled up in them. Frank went over to help get her out, while Alice got uneasily to her feet, holding the golden egg curiously.

"Where are we?" Lily demanded as she finally pulled the last, thankfully dry and clean, towel from off her head while Frank tugged the fluffy white one free where it had tangled her legs.

"Prefects bathroom," the lone Prefect of their group answered as he pulled his friend out of, what the others now realized, was indeed a swimming pool sized bathtub.

She looked around with admiration at the grandeur of every gleaming tile, the picture of a mermaid more reminiscent of her youth than any textbook she'd found in this castle, and the diving board as she grudgingly made her way to Potter and handed him his glasses she'd somehow acquired in her mess.

He set them back in place and she immediately regretted her moment of kindness as he beckoned her to follow. "Come here Evans, you're going to love this."

"Last time we ended up in a bathroom it wasn't exactly pleasant," she grumbled as she watched him regardless, bolting right past everyone to the available taps each with a different jewel inset, and turning two on at once.

She, Alice, and Frank edged forward to see one pipe shooting out rainbow glitter, the other had lavender scented, flower shaped bubbles dripping down. Lily knelt and stuck her hand in curiously, to find it the perfect temperature.

"This thing's a damned miracle worker if you need to relax, I've spent ages in here this year before a Quidditch game thanks to Moony sharing the password. Really helps relax the muscles," he said with an open grin at her, she was pretty sure he wasn't even imagining her in the tub yet.

"I'll bet even Snivellus would take a bath in this," Sirius Black muttered from behind his best mate, who laughed in surprise. Lily scowled hatefully and stalked away. James watched her go with an unrepentant smile, he'd never grow tired of her tenacity.

"Passwords Pine Fresh, it never changes," he called to her retreating form.

"You ever think you're taking the wrong approach there," Alice was frowning at the pair of idiots, Potter didn't even seem to realize he'd done anything wrong.

"When I want your advice, I'll ask for it," he said in all cheerfulness.

Frank scowled at the idiot, took Alice's hand, and led her away without argument, joining Lily near the door now, the three of them inspecting the egg with curiosity and discussing if Harry would actually work out the clue in this place like Cedric Diggory had suggested.

James watched the three with longing, he'd love to go over there, take Lily's hand so casually, just shoot the breeze and talk amongst her and her friends all day. He was genuinely happy for her she finally had decent people to talk to, she'd never given herself the chance always hanging around Snivellus, and he hoped it stayed that way. From what he'd known of Smith and Longbottom before all this they were decent people, always stayed on the fringe of classes, but for two purebloods they certainly never got involved in the nastier students he did know of their houses.

He knew if he tried now she'd spurn him again, he really shouldn't have laughed at Sirius' joke and he knew that, but didn't she get that's what it was? A joke? If Padfoot had said the same about Regulus or even himself James would have laughed. She was always so diligent about everything in her life, it was one of the many aspects of why he loved to watch her. The way she always thought through a question so long before answering, she often missed her opportunity in class, she studiously stuck to what she was doing despite his best attempts, be it hanging around a waste of space like Snape or her homework, he only wanted to give her a bit of fun in her life she really needed. She'd get that eventually.

James turned back to see Regulus was trying to pick a fight with Sirius, again. There was another lad who needed more fun in his life, as well as that stick removed from his arse.

"You really don't have anything else to say to him?" Regulus demanded.

"What's there to say?" Sirius forced casualness in his voice without looking up, clearly intent on looking for his favorite tap that would give the foam the consistency of a snowball. "He'd say he could never do it, again, we believe him, I guess, and we move on." His hand was trembling so hard by the end he didn't seem to know which way he was trying to twist the tap anymore, but it wasn't moving regardless. "Guess we'll all find out what's what eventually, yeah?"

Peter and Regulus exchanged an uneasy look. It wasn't a solution as far as they were concerned, Sirius had managed to avoid the question, but it was...progress?

James clucked his tongue and jumped in to stop anything else happening, so long as they were all stuck together he would not rest until he got some enjoyment. "Tell me you lot aren't actually going to spend the entire time we're in here, of all places, talking!"

Then he shucked out of his clothes in record time once more, boxers alone covering him as he dived head long into the water. Sirius grinned and quickly mimicked him, with a cannon ball off the diving board splashing the mermaids painting. The two caused water to immediately start sloshing over the edges as they began a rowdy game of tag.

Peter did not feel like joining them, but he dutifully sat on the edge of the pool next to Remus, who was smiling and laughing at their antics and egging them on. He summoned the book to him, which bizarrely came shooting out of one of the pipes that had yet been turned on, and flipped it open before looking around and seeing Regulus hovering uneasily. He beckoned him over and smiled when he did with only a bit of hesitation. None of them felt up to talking anymore it seemed, and if asked they would have blamed it on how close they hopefully were to discovering Harry's egg clue.

"The Egg and the Eye? What's an eye got to do with this?" Lily shivered in disgust at the idea, wondering for a wild moment if the egg was going to somehow get Harry put in the hospital wing for hurting his eye or something.

"Maybe Moody makes another grand appearance," Frank offered, "helps him out again."

Lily nodded this made sense, admittedly more distracted than she would have liked to admit as she eyed Potter and Black in the pool. It seemed for every step she took to actually try and be civil to him, more in pity than anything for this mess so thoroughly and repeatedly having an affect on him, he took seven back. Reverting back to the same loathsome toerag at the first chance, would the idiot never learn his lesson?

She listened intently as Harry made his way here, enjoyed himself for a few moments with the pool as well, and then nearly had heart failure when Moaning Myrtle appeared. Her popping eyes stayed on the Marauders, none of whom batted an eye at this development. Only little Regulus Black was spluttering in surprise, and he got a mouth full of soapy water from his brother for that before he could say anything.

"Well, this bathroom just lost a bit of appeal," Alice shivered in revulsion as she hugged herself for a moment at the idea of a ghost peeping in on her.

"It's never occurred to me they can just appear in the bathrooms, of anywhere in here," Frank agreed with a grimace. Lily looked around hopefully, and spotted Harry's copy of the Marauders Map. It must have been, as it was several years older than the one she'd seen in said Marauders possession inside Honeydukes, which was currently still in one of their pockets. This one had aged parchment, was crinkled, and dogeared. Yet the enchantment to activate it still worked just as well, and she scanned it carefully now for their place, finally spotting their eight little dots, but not another soul except Mrs. Norris several floors down.

She showed the other two, who only looked slightly less queasy, as that didn't change how often it likely still did happen.

Harry's unendearing encounter with her was almost worth it though, as she helped him work out his clue, and they all listened open mouthed at the mermaid song.

"Damn, that's brilliant," Frank was smiling now at the prospect of hearing this in person but still eyeing the water, and the two rowdy boys in it, without much hope.

James and Sirius had been listening, and were quite pleased at this new development, but now that it had come to pass what Harry would be dealing with, they refused to let it sink down their groups spirits as much as it was Harry's. Yeah, how would he breath underwater for an hour? It was a valid question, and one they could deal with later. For now James heaved himself out of the pool and went padding over to them, but they'd clearly been so distracted they didn't realize any such thing until he said right beside them, "are you really not going to get in?"

Smith dropped the egg in surprise, it did indeed clatter around before opening with a painfully loud racket before he went chasing after it to close it. The three were left with more aggrieved looks than ever on him, so he shrugged and said, "have it your way." Prize now in hand, he jogged back and did a flip into the water.

Sirius waited for no such thing as permission, he'd taken the eggs noisy distraction to swim over to Remus, grab his legs, and jerk him in. He came up trying to splutter curses through the soapy water and swatting at him to Sirius' unrepentant smile. "Now if only we were the only two in here," he whispered into his ear, reaching through the water to squeeze the inside of his thigh before taking off again.

Remus swallowed another mouthful and was now grateful nobody could see below his waist, and the water really was rather warm, that's why his skin was suddenly so flush.

"Well then you two, are you going to have a listen?" James called, pushing his hair out of his face to eye Peter and Regulus, but both had been reexamining the mermaids song and barely looked up long enough to shake their heads they didn't want to get in. "How on Earth did we get saddled into this mess with such boring wankers?" He demanded of Sirius.

"Beats me Prongs," Sirius nodded, before taking a breath and ducking under the water. James quickly followed, and Remus rolled his eyes before acquitting.

By the time they came up, Harry was stuck in the trick stair and witness to the strangest of nighttime scenes even they'd never been privy to.

Lily watched as Potter laughed himself silly at his sons misfortune, then rolled onto his back and began floating peacefully in the water like he could take a nap to the sound of this mess. It infuriated her to no end, Harry could get into so much trouble if he was caught now, did he really not care at all? She reflected back if she'd just seen this back before this mess started she would have thought him the most uncaring heartless person there was, but she knew better now. That was him fidgeting, not just kicking his legs around in the water at the idea of Harry getting caught. He kept dumping his head back into the water and then sitting up and ruffling his hair into messy spikes rather than show his concern why Barty Crouch was so weirdly involved in something to do with Severus' office.

It wasn't as if he was afraid to show any other emotion, like brash carelessness or obnoxiousness, why then did he feel the need to smother such things?

Regulus watched over Peter's shoulder as Moody saved Harry yet again from getting caught by Snape and fixing this mess for him, he couldn't blame the auoror's intensity over the map either when he got his hand on it. While Sirius and his two friends continued splashing each other wildly, with no hope of hearing the warning the chapter was almost over, he reached over and grabbed the two idiots clothes and held them firmly against his chest. He wouldn't wish that mess upon anyone.