#and she was exhausted by the constant attention from both of them so she asked them to please do SOMETHING with each other

[juriyuna]

ranka going from monzenbashi to ryuugasaki

[thewulf]

Beneath the Healer's Touch || Azriel

Summary: Request - I was wondering if you could write an ACOTAR fic with Azriel as the reader’s mate where the reader is Madja’s apprentice, but she rarely ever asks her to personally treat their patients, like she’s just there to assist with the equipment and materials and stuff and the IC never really questioned it... Read Rest Here

A/N: Wasn't planning on putting two Az fics out in a row but I just had to write this. Love it so much, thank you for the requests :)

Pairing: Azriel x Female Reader (Night Court Healer Reader)

Word Count: 5.6k +

TW: Use of Magic (fluffy), yelling

You huddle against the rough fabric of the medical tent situated perilously close to the front lines. As Madja’s apprentice your role in the Night Court has always been subdued. Your presence nearly as invisible as the shadows where you often stand. A shy but observant female fae, you’ve adapted to watching and learning. You assisted with the preparation of healing instruments and materials rather than engaging in the direct act of healing itself. Madja, the seasoned healer you serve under has never asked you to step beyond these boundaries . That was until today.

Outside of the tent the clash and clamor of war reverberate through the air. A constant reminder of the stakes at play. Inside the tent the atmosphere is thick with the scent of blood and herbs being punctuated by the groans of soldiers bearing the fresh scars of battle. Each day the flow of injured warriors increases, overwhelming even Madja’s formidable skills.

Her usual calm efficiency begins to wane under the strain. Her movements growing more frantic as she tries to attend to multiple critical cases simultaneously. The limited space of the tent is filled with the wounded and the air is heavy with desperation and the iron tang of blood.

Seeing the desperation in Madja's eyes as she struggles to keep up you begin to feel the weight of every unattended soldier pressing down upon you. Your hands which were so accustomed to organizing and managing the background needs itch to do more — to heal and to help directly.

In a moment of sheer necessity Madja turns to you with a look of grave urgency. "I need you now, more than ever," she says over the din of suffering. Her voice thick with exhaustion. "You must help me heal them. We are losing too many. I have called for more help, but I need you today."

As the urgent call pierces through the chaotic sounds of the medical tent you look into Madja’s eyes feeling the weight of her plea. Your heart races but your response is calm and resolute. “I’ll do it,” you say quickly. The words almost catching in your throat.

Madja reaches out, her hand briefly squeezing yours. A gesture laden with both gratitude and apology. “I’m sorry to ask this of you,” she murmurs as her voice laced with regret as she glances at the wounded waiting for attention.

You shake your head dismissing her concerns with a small, reassuring smile that you hope masks your nervousness. “It’s alright, Madja. I’ll be okay,” you assure her while stepping closer to the first of many soldiers who need your help. Your voice is stronger than you feel, imbued with a determination that you muster from the depths of your commitment to heal. Despite the personal cost.

With a deep, steadying breath you prepare yourself for the task ahead knowing each healing touch will draw the pain into your own body. But in this moment of desperate need your resolve is unwavering. You are ready to face whatever comes for the sake of those who depend on you.

Your heart hammers in your chest as you step forward. Your usual place behind the scenes abandoned for the harsh reality of frontline medical work. You approach the first soldier laid out before you. His injuries severe and daunting. As you extend your hands to begin the healing a part of you recoils knowing the personal cost you will soon pay. With a deep breath you brace yourself against the incoming tide of pain that will transfer to you as you heal him accepting the burden as the price of your newfound duty.

In the stifling heat of the medical tent, you move from one soldier to the next. Your hands becoming conduits of both healing and suffering. The first soldier’s injury—a deep gash across his arm—closes under the gentle press of your palms but the sharp sting of the wound sears through you as if the blade had cut into your own flesh. You stifle a gasp, biting down on your lip to keep composed as the pain lingers. It was a cruel echo of the soldier's relief.

With each healing the burden grows heavier. A fractured leg brings an ache that settles deep into your bones making you falter for a moment as you steady yourself against a tent pole. A burn from a fire spell sends waves of searing heat coursing through your skin. You struggle to maintain the calm exterior expected of a healer. Despite the agony each touch brings you press on being driven by the urgent need around you.

The soldiers were unaware of the cost you pay with each healing thank you with weak smiles and hoarse words of gratitude. You return their thanks with nods and a faint smile making sure to hide the toll their pain exacts upon you.

Throughout all of this the Inner Circle is embroiled in their own battles too consumed by strategic planning and counterattacks to notice the quiet suffering of Madja’s apprentice. They see you sometimes as a fleeting figure moving among the cots, but the depth of your sacrifice remains unseen being masked by the chaos of war and the stoic mask you wear.

The pain accumulates as a collection of injuries that are not your own yet reside within you. As the day wears on you feel yourself weakening. The physical costs of your hidden ability dragging at your limbs making each step heavier. Each breath shallower. Still, you continue, the need to help, to heal, pushing you beyond your limits. The cries of pain are a call you cannot ignore even as each healing tears a little piece from your own reserves of strength.

In the privacy of brief moments alone when you can lean against the cool canvas of the tent and close your eyes, the reality of your situation presses close, intimate, and overwhelming. How long can you sustain this? The question haunts the back of your mind, but you push it away instead focusing on the faces of those you’ve saved on the necessity of your pain for their relief. This is the path you’ve chosen. Hidden in shadows yet illuminated by the faint glow of altruism, bearing silently the scars that no one else can see.

As dusk begins to settle over the camp casting long shadows between the rows of tents Azriel returns from a skirmish. His usually composed expression tightened with discomfort. The shadows that constantly swirl around him seem agitated reflecting his unease. He carries a minor wound. A laceration on his arm that under normal circumstances would be a trivial matter for a healer of his caliber. However, this wound is tainted with faebane, a substance notorious for its ability to thwart fae healing magic.

You watch from a distance initially noticing the way he grimaces as he presses his fingers against the jagged edge of the cut attempting to coax his own magic to seal it. But the faebane embedded in the wound repels each attempt. And with each failed healing his frustration grows. An exceptionally rare crack in his usually impenetrable demeanor.

Recognizing his struggle, you approach him tentatively. The weight of the day’s healings presses heavily on you. Each step toward him a battle against the fatigue that threatens to buckle your knees. “Azriel,” you call softly not wanting to startle him.

He looks up and for a brief moment you’re caught in the intensity of his gaze. His eyes that were usually so guarded and unreadable were now openly display his vexation and pain. "It's this damned faebane," he mutters almost to himself as his hand falls away from the wound.

Stepping closer you offer a small, reassuring smile though your body screams in protest. “Let me try,” you whisper while extending your trembling hands towards his arm.

As your fingers brush against his skin a shock of connection jolts through you. Stronger and more profound than anything you've felt with the other soldiers. It’s as if his very soul resonates with yours. A hum of compatibility that whispers of a deeper bond. Your heart stutters in your chest but you focus on the task at hand pushing away the implications of what this connection might mean.

You press your palms to the laceration and immediately a sharp pain slices through your own arm, mirroring Azriel’s wound. You stifle a cry by biting the inside of your cheek hard enough to taste blood. The sensation is intense, more so because it’s Azriel’s pain you’re sharing now. Despite the agony you pour your energy into the healing being driven by a newfound desperation.

Azriel watches you. His expression shifting from one of pain to concern. "You don’t have to do this," he starts. His voice rough with his own discomfort and the growing worry for yours.

But you shake your head pushing through the pain with a determination that frightens even you. "I can handle it," you lie. The words barely a whisper over the throbbing in your arm. As the faebane slowly loses its grip and the wound begins to close a wave of dizziness hits you. So strong that you sway on your feet.

As Azriel steadies you with his shadows curling anxiously around his form he is acutely aware of the pain coursing through his arm, mirroring the wound he just healed. As a shadowsinger he has always been attuned to the deeper often hidden emotions of those around him. He was capable of sensing the unspoken pains and secret fears that others carry silently. However, this experience is startlingly intense. A raw echo of agony that pulses through him with unusual clarity.

The pain he feels as you heal him doesn't feel like his own. It’s as if he’s tapped into a direct stream of your suffering. This connection, though new and unexplored, unnerves him. It is more profound than anything he has experienced through his shadows before. Almost as if the pain itself has a voice, whispering of shared suffering and mutual burden. He struggles with the realization that he is feeling your agony so vividly. The lines of empathy blurring into something deeper. Something he can't quite understand yet.

In this moment as the faebane's resistance fades and the laceration begins to heal, Azriel finds himself grappling with a mix of concern and a peculiar sense of protectiveness. The intensity of the connection doesn’t fit into the usual confines of his abilities or past experiences. While he doesn't comprehend the full extent of what this means—far from realizing the potential of a mate bond—he recognizes that something significant lies beneath the surface of this shared pain. This unexpected insight into your sacrifice doesn't just alarm him. It shifts something fundamental in how he perceives you. Compelling him to reassess the nature of your relationship and his instincts towards you.

His hands were gripping your shoulders with surprising gentleness. "What is this costing you?" he asks. His voice laced with a rare note of vulnerability having felt a trace of your suffering through the nascent bond neither of you yet understands.

You want to reassure him. To tell him it’s nothing but the shadows in his eyes seem to see through you, recognizing the depth of your sacrifice. In this shared moment of pain and healing the unspoken truth of your connection lingers heavily between you. A secret laid bare by the battle scars you both carry.

You meet Azriel's intense gaze seeing the concern etched in his features threatening to unravel the composure you've fought so hard to maintain. His hands on your shoulders feel both grounding and alarming. As if they're the only things keeping you from collapsing under the weight of your own sacrifices. "I need to keep going," you manage to say. Your voice a strained whisper that barely conceals the weariness lacing each syllable. "There are others who need me."

Trying to inject a note of reassurance into your tone you add quickly, "It's part of healing, Azriel. I'll be okay." Even as you speak the words you feel the hollowness behind them. A contrast to the truth of your pain. But you're determined not to let him see just how much it's affecting you not wanting to add to his burdens.

With a gentle but firm push against his hands you step back pulling away from his comforting grasp. "I have to go," you insist, turning towards the next cot where another soldier lies moaning in pain. You don't look back almost afraid that if you do your resolve will crumble under the weight of his worry and the unspoken connection that you both feel but don't yet understand. You move forward, each step fueled by a mix of duty and the urgent need to escape the intensity of his scrutiny and the complicated emotions it stirs within you.

Azriel was still visibly troubled by the earlier interaction. With your evident strain he insists on accompanying you as you move from one wounded soldier to another. His presence is a silent, watchful shadow that lingers just at the edge of your vision. While the others of the Inner Circle are engaged in the throes of battle, Azriel has chosen to remain by your side. A decision that speaks more of his concern than any words could.

As you press on each healing session takes more from you. Draining your energy, drawing more of your strength. Azriel observes closely noting the increasing pallor of your skin and the subtle tremors in your hands each time you withdraw them from a wound. Despite your attempts to mask your pain, each expression, each falter does not escape his vigilant gaze.

As you lean over a severely wounded soldier focusing intently on sealing a deep, life-threatening laceration the accumulated pain from your healings surges like a tide, overwhelming and relentless. The sharp and unyielding agony lashes through you, blurring your vision and weakening your knees. You feel the darkness creeping in at the edges of your consciousness threatening to pull you under.

In a desperate bid to maintain control you reach out not for Azriel but for the tent’s support pole—a futile attempt to steady yourself. Yet, your hands grasp only air as your strength finally fails. Before you can process the fall Azriel’s arms are around you. His reaction swift and sure. He pulls you gently against him cushioning your collapse as he lowers both of you smoothly to the floor of the tent.

In this moment your pride battles with the undeniable relief of his support. You hadn't called for him. You hadn't wanted to admit that he might have been right about the danger of your condition, yet here he is, the one catching you as you fall. His presence is both a comfort and a confrontation. A not-so-subtle reminder of your own vulnerability.

Azriel cradles you against his chest. His expression a mask of concern etched deep with the lines of fear for your well-being. He doesn’t speak immediately instead opting to brush a gentle hand across your forehead, pushing away strands of hair matted with sweat. His touch is soft, almost reverent, as if he’s both trying to comfort you and reassure himself of your presence.

Around you the battle's distant roars continue but within the tent a quiet bubble of stillness envelops you both punctuated only by your labored breaths. Azriel’s gaze is locked on your face searching for any sign of recovery. Looking for any indication that you might overcome this bout of weakness.

In his eyes there is a flicker of something more—something beyond mere concern. It's a profound realization of your sacrifice. Of the silent suffering you've endured to heal others. And with this realization comes a fierce protectiveness. A vow forming in the depths of his being. He holds you closer, a silent promise cradled in the curve of his arms, that from this moment forward he will do whatever it takes to protect you. To ensure that this burden of pain is no longer yours to bear alone. The bond between you seemingly mysterious and undefined becomes his anchor. The thing he clings to as he silently pledges to be the safeguard you might not admit you need but he knows you deserve.

The pain you've been shouldering now echoes clearly through the bond that neither of you fully understands yet. But its intensity is unmistakable. Azriel feels each pang as if it were his own. A shared torment that binds you together with an ironclad tether. His face was mere inches from yours and is etched with deep concern and something akin to fear. "Hold on," he urges. His voice a low, desperate command. "Stay with me."

As Azriel holds you in his arms feeling the distressing ebb of your consciousness his protective instincts surge into high alert. The warmth from your body seems to be fading and your breathing becomes worryingly shallow. Typical signs that your physical limits have been catastrophically breached. Panic tightens its grip on him. A vivid contrast to the usual calm demeanor of the shadowsinger.

"Madja!" he calls out desperately. His voice piercing the relative quiet of the tent with an urgency that rattles the air. The shadows around him stir reflecting his growing desperation. He needs her expertise, her understanding of your mysterious condition that now seems perilously close to claiming you.

Madja rushes through the flaps of the tent with her healer's bag clutched tightly, the sight that greets her—a formidable Azriel cradling you, pale and barely conscious—draws a sharp intake of breath from her. She kneels beside you both. Her experienced eyes quickly assessing your condition.

"What happened?" she demands. Her voice thick with worry and confusion. As she lays her hands on you seeking to gauge the extent of your depletion Azriel's gaze hardens.

"She's been healing the soldiers, taking their pain onto herself," Azriel explains. His words rushed. His tone laced with both accusation and fear. "She collapsed just now. How could you not know the toll it was taking on her?"

Madja's expression crumbles into one of profound guilt and regret. She meets Azriel's intense gaze with a resigned sorrow. "I knew," she admits. Her voice a whisper of remorse. "I knew, but I thought we could manage it—keep it under control. I feared the implications of her gift being fully exposed. I thought I was protecting her."

Azriel’s anger wanes slightly instead replaced by a sharp pang of understanding. He knows all too well the complexities of hiding one's true capabilities in a world that might not understand or might exploit them. However, his concern for your well-being remains paramount.

"She needs help now, Madja. What can we do?" he asks with his voice softening but still tinged with urgency.

Madja nods. Her focus turning entirely to you. "I can stabilize her for now, but we need to rethink how she uses her gift," she says as she begins to channel her own healing magic into you. A gentle flow designed not to heal but to sustain.

As Madja works Azriel holds you closer. His thoughts racing with concern and resolve. He watches the slight return of warmth to your cheeks under Madja’s skilled care, feeling a blend of relief and determination surge through him. A promise forms in his heart. Not merely to protect you but to truly understand and support your unique gift, no matter the cost.

However, the demands of the ongoing battle pull at him. Madja noticed the conflict in his expression speaks with a calm authority. "She must rest now, Azriel," she advises with her voice steady. "And they need you. The battle isn't over yet."

Reluctantly Azriel nods. The weight of his responsibilities clear on his face. He leans down with his lips brushing your forehead in a gentle kiss. His assurance of returning to you. "I'll be back soon," he promises. His voice a whisper meant only for you. With one last lingering look that conveys all his worry and care he stands and leaves the tent. His figure soon disappearing into the fray.

The war rages on demanding every ounce of Azriel's focus and skill. Yet his thoughts frequently stray back to the medical tent, to you, lying there in recovery. Each moment he can spare he finds himself glancing towards the tent. His mind racing with scenarios of returning to you.

As the last echoes of battle fade and a weary peace begins to settle, Azriel's duties finally allow him a moment to breathe. He wastes no time. The moment he is able he rushes back to the medical tent with his steps quick with urgency and anticipation. Pushing through the tent flaps, Azriel’s eyes immediately seek you out. He finds you awake but visibly exhausted propped up against some pillows. The sight of you, alive and recovering, though still weak floods him with relief.

“I’m here,” Azriel breathes out as he quickly crosses the space to your side before kneeling beside your cot. His hand reaches out brushing a stray lock of hair from your face with a tenderness that belies his warrior's exterior. “How are you feeling?” he asks. His voice low and filled with concern. His eyes scanning your face for any sign of pain or discomfort.

Azriel’s presence instantly eases some of the weight pressing down on you and relief softens your features. "I'm exhausted," you admit but manage a weak smile. "But I'll be alright, just need some rest." Your eyes meet his and even in your weariness there's an undeniable relief that reflects back from his gaze. An unspoken understanding of the solace you both find in each other’s presence after the chaos of battle.

"You had us worried for a while there," Azriel says. His voice a mix of relief and mild reprimand. His eyes scan your face still searching for signs of pain or lingering fatigue. His concern palpable but not overwhelming. "Madja told me you'd recover but seeing it for myself makes all the difference."

Your smile deepens slightly at his words. You were grateful for his concern and the straightforward honesty that always marked your interactions. "I'll be fine, Azriel. Really," you assure him with your tone aiming to put him at ease. "It's good to have you back though."

In the days following the battle, as the camp slowly transitions from a place of urgent healing back to routine operations, your strength begins to return. With each passing day the pain and exhaustion that had once clouded your vision start to fade instead replaced by a growing vigor that Madja assures you is a good sign of recovery. Azriel, true to his word, visits often. His presence a constant reassurance as the camp breaks down around you. The war finally declared over.

Once you're deemed well enough to travel Azriel accompanies you back to Velaris. The journey was facilitated by the magic of winnowing is quick but disorienting. A dramatic shift from the dusty tents and the sharp smells of medicine to the lush, serene beauty of the Night Court. Back in Velaris the city seems to embrace you both with open arms. The familiar sights and sounds of the vibrant city life, the cobblestone streets lit by lanterns and the murmur of the Sidra River, provide a comforting backdrop to your continued recovery.

A few nights after your return, once you feel stronger and more like yourself, Azriel invites you to join him on a balcony overlooking Velaris. The balcony was part of a high vantage point in the House of Wind and offers a breathtaking view of the city spread out beneath a canopy of stars. The transition from the harsh realities of war to this peaceful setting marks a significant shift in your healing process—both physical and emotional.

Seated together on the balcony the atmosphere between you is one of tentative peace. A reprieve from the chaos of the battlefield. The evening air is cool and carrying the gentle scent of night-blooming flowers. There’s a quiet that allows for softer, more intimate conversation. Here with the distance from the front lines you both find the space to reflect on the recent events and the impact they’ve had on each of you discussing thoughts and feelings that the war left little room to explore.

This tranquil setting in Velaris which was far removed from the demands of war allows you both to see each other in a new light. Appreciating the resilience and strength each has shown, and perhaps, beginning to understand the deeper bond that seems to have formed in the crucible of conflict.

Azriel breaks the silence between you with a gentle voice reflecting the calm of the night. "I've been thinking about your healing abilities. About your gift," he says before pausing as if searching for the right way to broach the subject without overstepping. "It's a heavy burden you've carried… taking on others' pain."

You nod appreciating his careful approach. "It can be overwhelming," you admit. Your voice low. Sharing this truth with him feels both vulnerable and relieving. "Especially knowing that each time I heal, I take a little bit of that pain into myself."

The softness of his gaze as he looks at you speaks volumes, and he shifts slightly closer. "Perhaps we can find a way to ease that burden," he suggests. "Explore methods to shield you or at least to share the load." The idea of sharing this part of your life with Azriel, having him understand and perhaps help carry the weight, brings a warmth to your heart. It’s a tentative step towards deeper connection and you find yourself hoping for more.

"And how about us?" Azriel adds after a moment, the question hanging between you like a delicate thread. "These past weeks, feeling everything that you have felt... it’s made me realize how deeply connected I am to you. More than I anticipated." The admission hangs in the air and is charged with an unspoken depth of emotion. You felt it too. The inexplicable pull towards him. Something beyond mere friendship.

You smile a soft, genuine expression that lights up your eyes. "I feel it too," you confess. "It's like there’s something between us, something... more."

The conversation flows more freely now, the initial hesitance giving way to a hopeful exploration of what might be. Neither of you mentions the word 'mates,' still dancing around the full depth of your bond, but there’s an unspoken acknowledgment of the significance of your connection.

As the night deepens between you, you and Azriel make promises. Not grand declarations but quiet vows to support each other. To explore the depth of your bond and understand the extent of your powers together. It's a mutual commitment filled with the promise of discovering not just the mysteries of your abilities but also the potential of what you could be to each other.

With the city of Velaris sparkling below and the tranquil night wrapping around you there’s a sense of beginning. Of possibilities waiting to be explored. Together you watch the stars comforted by the presence of each other and hopeful for the future.

In the quiet of the pre-dawn, you and Azriel linger on the balcony ensconced in the gentle embrace of Velaris' early morning serenity. The sky is a tapestry of deep blues and purples and begins to lighten at the horizon, heralding the dawn. The air around you is charged with the quiet anticipation of the world waking up. A fitting backdrop for the profound moment unfolding between you.

Azriel's gaze remains fixed on the horizon, but his mind is clearly elsewhere—on the revelations of the night, on the words that now hover on the edge of being spoken. Finally, he turns to you with his expression open. He was vulnerable in a way that you've seldom seen from the reserved shadowsinger. "There's something undeniable about the connection between us," he begins. His voice soft, reverent almost. "It goes beyond what we’ve had. Beyond friendship.” You meet his gaze feeling the truth of his words resonate within you. It's a truth you've sensed but haven't dared to define until this moment.

Finally finding the courage to speak what he’s discovered he steps closer making sure to bridge the gap between you. His presence enveloping you in warmth. "I've felt every echo of your pain, every ripple of your joy as if they were my own. It's more than just empathy… it's a bond, a deep, unbreakable bond." His hands find yours. His touch gentle but firm. "I believe we're mates," he says. The words charged with emotion and an unspoken plea for you to feel the same.

Your heart leaps. The simplicity and sincerity of his admission cutting through any lingering doubts. You smile, not just with your lips but with your entire being, accepting the truth of his words and the bond they confirm. "Azriel, I've sensed it as well," you reply with your voice soft yet filled with wonder. "It’s as if there’s been a song woven into the fabric of our days, subtle yet persistent, waiting for us to finally hear it and understand its tune."

Azriel's smile in response is a thing of quiet joy. A uniquely rare and tender sight that stirs something deep within you. He pulls you gently closer and you find yourself wrapped in his embrace. The city around you awakening as the first light of dawn spills over the edges of the world.

In the tranquil embrace of dawn Azriel holds you close. His heart beating a tentative rhythm against yours. His voice carries a rare vulnerability that makes the air around you thrum with the weight of his words. “Do you want that?" he asks softly. His breath warm against your hair. "To always be there for each other. To face whatever this world throws at us, together, as one?"

He pulls back slightly as his hands were still gently cradling your face. His eyes searching yours for any sign of hesitation. This question isn't merely rhetorical. It's a genuine, open-ended inquiry into your desires. A request for your heart's agreement with his. Azriel's usual certainty is replaced by an endearing, hopeful uncertainty. Highlighting how deeply he values your consent and participation in this burgeoning bond.

You look into his eyes. Into those deep pools of night that have seen so much sorrow and solitude, now laced with tender hope. The dawn casts its first gentle rays illuminating the sincerity and slight apprehension on his face. This moment, this question, isn't just about confirming a bond. It's about choosing to build a future together.

"Yes, Azriel," you respond. Your voice steady and sure, a soft yet resolute affirmation that echoes the depth of your own feelings. "I want that more than anything."

Azriel's response is immediate. His eyes reflecting a profound relief and joy that seem to brighten the very air around him. A broad, genuine smile spreads across his face transforming his usually stoic expression into one of pure elation.

"You've just made me the happiest male in all of Prythian," he breathes out as his voice is rich with emotion. The sincerity in his words resonates deeply echoing the significance of your acceptance.

His arms pull you closer. The warmth of his embrace enveloping you as he whispers, "We'll face everything together, side by side. No matter what comes we won't face it alone."

"Always," you echo back, your voice a soft yet resolute affirmation. The certainty in your agreement strengthens the bond between you weaving your fates together with threads of shared strength and mutual understanding setting a path forward together in the intertwining dance of your shared lives.

Azriel’s smile deepens at your words. His relief and joy palpable. The certainty of your mutual promise solidifies the bond between you weaving your fates together with threads of shared strength and understanding. His hands that still cradling your face shift slightly and his fingers brush tenderly across your lips. A touch so gentle it sends a shiver down your spine.

The intimate gesture holds a world of meaning. As he gazes into your eyes the warmth and intensity of his emotions are clear. He leans in, his breath mingling with yours, and for a moment, the world narrows to just the two of you. Then with a tenderness that quickly deepens into something more he pulls you in for a kiss.

What starts as a gentle meeting of lips soon transforms into a kiss filled with passion and longing. As if all the emotions and realizations of the past days and weeks are being poured into this single, breathtaking moment. Azriel’s kiss is both a promise and a declaration, sealing the bond between you with a fervor that leaves you breathless.

Your arms wrap around him pulling him closer responding to the depth of his kiss with equal intensity. The world around you fades away leaving only the two of you entwined in a moment that transcends everything else. As the kiss lingers it becomes clear that this is not just a bond forged in the fires of battle but a connection that will shape your future, side by side, whatever may come.

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[barcaatthemoon]

loveable || jenni hermoso x reader ||

you overhear jenni and think she isn't interested in you.

there was something going on between you and jenni. everybody could see it except for the two of you. the two of you had a tendency of getting very flirty, something that had annoyed your barcelona teammates to no end. alexia and the others had been hopeful that maybe with jenni's move to mexico things would change a bit, but it only seemed to get worse.

if jenni had been bad before, the distance only made her worse. she was clingier than normal, going from flirtatious little touches to literally hanging off of you sometimes. there was rarely a moment whenever the two of you were near each other that she didn't have you tucked under her arms or was carrying you around on your back.

to alexia, it was sickening, which was why she had to say something. both you and jenni deserved to be happy in her mind, and maybe if the two of you just fucked, she wouldn't have to witness all the constant flirting. that was her intention when she approached jenni about you.

"okay, enough, it has to stop," alexia said as she shoved jenni into a room. she pushed the door behind her, but didn't check to make sure that it actually shut.

"what has to stop? i'm not doing anything," jenni huffed. alexia crossed her arms over her chest, unimpressed with jenni seemingly playing dumb. "stop looking at me like that."

"what's going on with you and (y/n)?" alexia asked. jenni shrugged as she leaned against the wall. that answer definitely wasn't good enough for alexia, who moved in towards jenni with the intention of intimidating her. jenni wasn't scared of alexia, however, and she never had been. jenni pushed up from the wall and squared up to alexia, knowing the younger woman would back down. "just ask her out."

"i'm in mexico now, and i'm not just going to come running back to spain, so it won't work. the distance will be too much, and she can't handle that. she's too young, alexia," jenni snapped. alexia was surprised to see her get to anger so quickly. there was obviously more going on than what jenni let on, so alexia pulled her over to sit down and really talk to her.

…

you hadn't meant to overhear alexia and jenni. the eavesdropping technically was done on purpose, but when your name was brought up, you were curious. jenni seemed to flirt with you a lot, even more than she did with everybody else. it was getting to the point where pina and patri were relentlessly teasing you at every chance they got. you had been looking for jenni to ask her out, both of them not having let up on the pestering since you got the call to come to national camp.

"what's wrong?" pina asked as she watched you stomp past them. you didn't stop to even look at them as you went straight up to your room. pina could tell that something was really wrong, so she pulled patri and ona away to talk to you. "(y/n)!"

"just leave me alone, please. i don't want to talk to you guys right now," you told them. that would have been enough for pina to leave you alone, but patri never really knew when to quit. if anything, your words had only made it more important in her mind to talk to you.

"did something happen little one?" patri asked as she pressed a kiss to your temple. you crumpled in her arms, unable to stop the tears from falling. it felt like forever before you were calm enough to tell her what happened with jenni. patri was quick to anger, as was pina. if it wasn't for ona, the two would have stormed off before you were even finished telling them what had happened.

"i'll kill her," pina hissed through grit teeth. ona rubbed the woman's back, hoping that it would soothe her anger a bit. "how dare she say that about (y/n). i'll kill her ona, i will."

"getting angry right now won't help. i am sure that jenni did not mean it like that. come on, we've all seen the way jenni looks at (y/n) when she's not paying attention," ona whispered. you were fast asleep on the bed, exhausted from crying, but ona didn't want to risk waking you up.

"well, i'm going for a walk," patri announced. pina stood up with her, only to be pulled back down by ona.

"only one of you can go, just one," ona told them. patri glanced back at (y/n) on the bed and nodded towards pina. you'd want your best friend there when you woke up, and truthfully, patri didn't want to get kicked out from camp while you were still so upset.

…

"hola bonita," jenni greeted you with a smile. you ignored her as patri walked you past her. jenni frowned, too upseet about you ignoring her to even notice the death glare being sent from your friend. "hey! what's wrong?"

"just go away jenni," patri warned. she placed her hand on the older woman's chest to keep some distance between you and her. jenni didn't like that one bit and started to push forward, prepared to shove past patri to get to you. however, it was alexia's hand on the back of jenni's shirt that kept her from charging forward.

"go in the conference room," alexia ordered. jenni walked away, huffing and puffing as she did. alexia turned past patri and towards you. "(y/n), i need you to go to the conference room. jenni has something she'd like to say to you."

"i would rather not talk to jenni right now," you told her. alexia sighed, knowing exactly why. whenever pina had come knocking on her door, alexia had been taken aback by the anger and aggression coming from the younger player. a quick explanation had cleared things up, and alexia knew that she had to help fix things since she had partially been the cause of them.

"jenni, she can explain herself. you just need to let her know what you heard," alexia said. you didn't want to argue with your captain, so you politely asked patri to watch your plate for you while you went to find jenni. the conference room door was still open, jenni sitting on the table instead of any of the chairs.

"alexia says that we need to talk," you said, careful to close the door behind you. "i do not really want to talk to you though, not after what you said about me."

"i didn't sa- oh." jenni seemed to deflate as she realized what you had overheard. "i'm sorry, and i swear that i did not mean any of it."

"then why would you say it?" you asked her.

"because i was scared. i didn't want to start something with you only to never get to see you. i didn't want you to throw away the best club for your career so we could be closer because i knew that you would," jenni explained.

"you don't know that i'd move to mexico," you huffed. jenni absolutely knew that you'd follow her anywhere. you were extremely loyal, having moved from your hometown club and barcelona's rival, real madrid to barcelona at the insistence of your friends.

"you left madrid for patri. i'd hate to see the lengths you'd go for me," jenni joked. you shoved her away from you at the joke, but only because you knew that she had a point. all it would take for you to do something like that for jenni was if she asked. "hey! you're making it hard for me to apologize right now."

"some apology." this time, it was jenni's turn to shove you. the two of you got into a little shoving match until jenni ended up grabbing both of your hands. she pinned them down to your sides, leaning in just enough for you to smell her perfume. you looked over at her face to see her staring at yours, more specifically, your lips.

"i'm so sorry for what i said," jenni whispered. you bit your lip as you nodded in understanding. "i really do want you. i want to wake up next to you in the morning. i want to take you out on special dates. i want to go to sleep next to you at night. but fuck, right now i just want to kiss you."

"then do it," you told her. jenni moved forward quickly, pressing her lips to yours. you kissed her back, but only for a few seconds. jenni pouted when you backed away from her, mouth open to question what was wrong. "i can't do this if you're just gonna go back to some girl in mexico."

"i would never," jenni promised you. she pressed a kiss to each of your cheeks before she continued. "there are no other girls, and i don't think there will be. i love you, understood?"

"no you don't," you tried to argue. jenni dropped your hands and cupped your cheeks. "you don't love me jenni, you like me, there's a difference."

"i know that there is, and i love you. it's part of why i left, i thought you were with one of the little hooligans," jenni said, using alexia's nickname for your friend group.

"why would you want to love me?"

"why is it so hard to accept that you're loveable?" jenni asked you. she wanted to kiss you again and again, but this felt like a much more important talk to be having.

"i'm not special, and i know the kind of women you were with before me. it's scary jenni, and i don't think i can compare," you admitted. jenni frowned at you, unsure of what exactly she could tell you to prove you wrong. "i want you so badly that it hurts, but i don't think i deserve you."

"you deserve better than me, but if you'll have me, then i won't argue. you deserve the world, mi carina. i can't give you everything, but i will always make sure that you have my love," jenni promised you. you leaned forward and pressed a kiss to her lips, smiling into it.

"they warned me you could be corny, but i didn't know you were such a sap," you teased. jenni pinched your thigh as she stood up. you followed her back into the cafeteria with everybody else, finally feeling like you could actually eat now that you knew that jenni didn't really look down at you.

[clubforfrogs]

Heyyy, SLIP UPS- AWESOME, WOMAN HOW DO U DO THIS-?

Also a request...!!! M so excited!!

Sirius black x reader snape

Basically snake's younger sister, is constantly bullied by the marauders, cuz of snape yk yk, especially on her make up preferable her foundation, after lots of teasing and bullying, she lashes out on sirius n removes her makeup to show a huge scar imprinted on her face. Cuz of her family issues n stuff. I leave how sirius reacts and their bonding up to you.

I LOVE UR WRITING SM, I SWEAR ITS SO GOOD. M NOT EVEN LYING. UR MY SOUL WRITER.

French love from dxb, Mon cherie

Um hello?! You’re literally the sweetest🫶🫶. I also love this request so much, so I hope I did it justice. I came up with this little blurb- I really hope you like it!

I’m currently working on a Sirius ask and a little James blurb- so keep on the look out for those.

Of All People - Sirius Black x Reader

~ 1.7k words

•

Now let’s be clear, you loved your brother, but some deep, shameful part of you resented him for the attention he attracted. Your parents had instilled posh pureblood ideologies into your heads from young ages. Luckily, you were able to see through their bullshit. Severus wasn’t so lucky. 

He brought that thinking into Hogwarts, and was ecstatic when both you and him were sorted into Slytherin, where he took no time at all befriending other air headed Slytherins who thought the same. This, along with the simple fact of his existence, brought the full wrath of the marauders down on your brother, which also trickled down to you. 

The marauders would endlessly bully and tease your brother. Being the dimwit he was, he always decides to try and fight back, ultimately failing every time. They would cast small hexes on you in the hallways, just constant, small annoyances. Eventually, it seemed as though Snape wasn’t enough of a challenge for the marauders, which caused them to turn fully to you. Now you were the one getting harassed. Constant jabs at the way you looked, filth about you thinking the same way as Severus, and the never ending comments about the amount of foundation you wore. What kind of guy even noticed that stuff? 

To be quite frank, it sucked. You were stuck with a shitty brother whom you loved, and a group of boys who bullied you for that very reason. It was exhausting, which meant that you valued every moment you could find yourself at peace- like right now. You were sitting underneath a tree near Black Lake. It was the first of the warmer days at Hogwarts, so you blended in with the multitudes of students soaking up the sun. You hoped this blending would be enough to allow you some quality time away from the marauders.

You leaned back your head against the bark of the tree. There was a gentle wind blowing across your face, a gentle buzz of voices coming from the other students outside, and a heavy liquid falling down your face. Wait… what? You opened your eyes quickly and rubbed at your face. It felt as though sticky black tar had been dumped on your head.

Though the substance made it hard to see, you could hear the roaring laughter of James, Peter, Remus, and Sirius. “What the hell? What is your issue? You couldn’t leave it for one day?” You questioned. You had cleared the goo enough clear your eyesight, and could see the amused faces of the boys. Sirius had the biggest grin stretching across his face, “Aw, we wouldn’t do that to you. You simply look too adorable with black sludge covering your face. Honestly, it looks better than that makeup you cake on everyday.” 

You could punch him for the look on his face. You had already been having a crappy day, as your parents had sent you a letter reminding you that the summer holiday was approaching, and they expected you to not forget your manners like you seem so inclined to do. 

Basically, if you didn’t listen to every word they said, you were going to “get straightened out” like your mother always said. The letter was fresh in your mind, and with it, a need to punch something. Luckily for you, there were four perfect targets standing right in front of you. 

You took a step towards James, the closest of them to you. He looked slightly confused, but taunted you nevertheless, “You coming in for a kiss? Sorry, I don’t French with snakes.” That was all you needed. You reared back your fist, and punched James Potter square in the gut. He doubled over in pain, and you swear you’ve never felt so much joy. Peter and Remus rushed over to him right away. Sirius looked at you in shock and took you by the shoulders. “You’re such a bitch! I knew all of the Snapes were the same. Just leave Hogwarts! We don’t need another bunch of rancid, pureblood twats spitting nonsense around here!” He was screaming in your face, and everything about what he was saying infuriated you. 

“Excuse me? Have you ever thought of asking about what I believe instead of assuming I’m just like my brother? I don’t believe in any of that shit! And what’s even worse, I have to suffer the consequences of being a half decent person all the time!” Sirius looked confused at your last sentence, so you rolled your eyes and casted a simple spell to clean the liquid off of your face, along with the thick layer of foundation you had applied that morning. Underneath, a giant scar cut along your cheek. It was relatively new, so the skin around it was red and puckered.

Sirius sucked in a quick breath. The other marauders had stopped cooing over James, and looked to you with shocked expressions. “Oh Merlin, I’m so sorry-“ you cut Sirius off. “Just stop, I thought you of all people would know what I was going through, but I guess not.” You started walking away, but when you heard the footsteps of Sirius behind you, you sped up to a run.

The footsteps behind you also increased in their pace, and a large hand grasped your wrist. You turned to look at Sirius. Tears had started forming in your eyes, but you wiped them away in futile the hope that would stop Sirius from seeing them. Sirius didn’t speak right away, instead he chose to study your face. You squirmed, under his scrutiny, you just felt ugly. Your red rimmed eyes, stuffy nose, and large scar now visible. You were heavily considering bolting away again until he spoke up, “I’m sorry. I- I never even considered that you might not be like your family. And you’re right, out of anyone, I should have been the one to give you the benefit of the doubt.” You looked back up at him, his eyes seemed genuinely apologetic, but that didn’t mean you were letting him off the hook just yet. 

“Yeah, you should be sorry. You and your cronies have been ruining my life here at Hogwarts. My one escape from my family. And you’ve been taking the absolute piss out of my brother. I know how he is, but he’s still my brother. Talk to me again when you show me you want to change.” With that, you pulled your wrist from his grip and walked back to your dorm. You really wanted to give him a second chance, partly because you had been harboring a small crush on him since first year. But before you could even let yourself consider that, he had to prove that he wanted to change. You sat in your dorm thinking about that very scenario, wishing, hoping, praying, that he would make the effort.

And in the next few weeks, he did. There were certainly the occasional taunts thrown towards your brother in the halls, but you supposed you could live with that. There were no more cruel pranks aimed towards you or Severus, and Sirius had even made James, Peter, and Remus write out apology notes and deliver them to you personally. You had probably gotten way too much enjoyment out of that one.

As you ate in the Great Hall, surrounded by a few acquaintances, you felt a tap on your shoulder. Behind you was a nervous looking Sirius. “Would you like to come over and eat with us? I swear, no bad intentions. We really want to get to know you.” His voice was much smaller than you had ever heard it. You weighed your options back and forth, but with the genuine effort he had been putting into righting his wrongs, there was no way you could deny him. “I would be delighted to.”

His face lit up at that, and you could see his confidence instantly repair itself. He led you over to where he and the other marauders sat, guiding you by placing his hand on the small of your back. The simple act caused your face to redden, but if he noticed, he didn’t say anything. Once you sat down at the table, everything was surprisingly normal. The other boys made one more quick apology each, but then the conversation quickly migrated to more light hearted topics.

“Okay, James,” it was hard to speak through your laughter, “You went up to this fifty year old dude, and insisted he was your mom?” The entire table burst out in laughter. “It was an intense game of truth or dare, I had ten galleons riding on it!” Remus smirked at him, “Yeah, but you still ended up losing,” he then looked to you, “You want to know why, Y/n?” You looked at him nodding, as you heard Peter groan, “Don’t do this mate.” Remus only spared him a glance as he launched back into his story, “So the truth or dare game was down to just Peter and James, and neither of them would back out. That’s when Sirius came out with this absolutely vile looking plate of chicken. It was cold, half raw, and definitely spoiled. We dared James and Peter to eat it for the win. James backed out immediately, but Peter ate it and puked for weeks.”

You had been drinking pumpkin juice as Remus told his story. But once he reached the part where Peter at the chicken, you lost it. Laughter spilled from your lips, and juice came up out of your nose. This only made the laughter at the table increase ten fold. You realized that you were receiving from worried glances from the students around you, but the laughter clouded your mind and you couldn’t bring yourself to care. You finally managed to calm yourself, and Sirius handed you a napkin of while wiping away a tear. You wiped away the juice, and caught sight of the watch on your wrist as you did so.

“Shit, I was supposed to be working on a Potions paper due tomorrow! I’ve gotta be off, this was lovely though!” You hugged Peter who sat right next to you, the boy looked a bit shocked, but satisfied nonetheless. You saw the pouty look emerge in Sirius’ eyes, so you leaned across the table and pecked him on the cheek. His face immediately blossomed into a lovely pink hue as the boys shouted out variations of, “You’re in!” “When’s the wedding?” and “Can I be the best man?” You smiled as you walked away from them, hoping that you’d be invited to sit with them again tomorrow.

[girlgenius1111]

screaming underwater

barça x teen reader. r is dealing with mistreatment on her national team. the barça girls find out. warnings: descriptions of aforementioned mistreatment by national team.

------

The news came out of nowhere. One minute, Alexia, Pina, Patri, and Mapi were at a restaurant eating lunch, and the next, Pina was staring at her phone in horror, all the color drained out of her face. 

“Clau? What’s up?” Patri asked, catching the look on her best friend’s face. This halted the conversation between the other 2 girls, and Alexia and Mapi both turned to their younger teammate in concern. 

Claudia shook her head, remaining silent as she handed her phone to Patri, standing up and leaving the table. 

“I need some air,” she said shakily. Alexia and Mapi exchanged looks, focusing their attention back on Patri for the moment. Patri had a rather similar reaction to Pina’s, practically shoving the phone into Mapi’s hand, and taking off towards the door her best friend had left through. 

“My god. Mapi, let me see.” Alexia complained, moving over so she could read over Mapi’s shoulder. 

She read the whole article, finishing just after Mapi did. The defender was looking up at her captain, distraught. 

“Fuck.” Alexia said. “Shit. Okay. We’ll go find Clau and Patri, and then we’ll call pequeña.” 

Alexia was always a voice of reason, and Mapi nodded gratefully, rising to her feet, throwing some cash on the table, and heading out of the restaurant. 

There was no longer any question of why her teammates had reacted the way they did. The contents of that article felt eerily similar. And if they were true, they had a lot to be worried about. 

-----

You’d finished your morning training session, pulling out your phone the minute you returned to your hotel room, and saw the article. First, though, you had to scroll through the messages upon messages from your teammates expressing their concern. You didn’t spend too long reading those, knowing it would likely be too much for you right now. 

It wasn’t as bad as it could have been; there were a lot of details omitted, some of the more worrying details. Still, it was more than the people in charge would want leaked to the media, especially when it painted them as the villains. 

In short, the article detailed, via anonymous interviews with some of your teammates, the conditions that your u23 national team was under. Your coach was vile, the training staff always following his lead. There were recovery specialists that many of you guys refused to work with. The personnel themselves were an issue. More than that, though, what they did was the biggest problem. The team hadn’t been performing very well, and as a consequence, you and your teammates were being worked half to death. Running until you dropped, scrimmaging until you couldn’t feel your legs anymore. You were woken early in the morning for extra workouts, and kept up late to go over film. It was constant, exhausting, and completely demoralizing. The way you were spoken too was no better than what your body was being put through. Your coach had apparently decided that the right way to motivate the team was to rip everyone to shreds. He hurled cruel insults at you and your teammates. He didn’t just go after your playing abilities; he went after your fitness, your weight, your personal life, your personality, your appearance, your relationships within the team. There were no boundaries. There was no way to say no, no way to make it stop. 

You were determined to handle it. You didn’t know any different when it came to your national team. Granted, it had never been this bad before, not in all your time with the team. You wanted it handled internally. You saw what your Spanish teammates went through when they tried to make a change, and their suffering wasn’t something you were willing to bring upon yourself and your teammates. You guys were all young, under the age of 23. If your Spanish teammates that were full adults couldn’t do it without winning a world cup, what chance did a bunch of kids have? No one would listen, it would only make it worse. Although, somewhere in the back of your mind, you knew you were suffering far more than you would be if you refused your call up. You didn’t give up, and you didn't ask for help. You’d never had the ability to do so, always wanting to be independent. International breaks became something you dreaded deeply, and something you attended all the same. It was a stagnant, constant torture, constant weight on your shoulders. Nothing really seemed like it would cause a change. 

Until the article was published. 

You didn’t know who’d spoken to the journalist, but you didn’t fault them. Though you’d never admit it, you were secretly glad that someone had been braver than you. Still, the verbal lashing you and your teammates got later that day was borderline abusive. The following punishment was worse. Your coach led the team to the stadium, into the stands, and instructed you all to begin running the stadium steps, until he felt you’d “learned your lesson.” 

No one spoke up, no one argued. Everyone just set off with a resigned sigh. You all ran for a while. What must have been at least an hour, in the hot sun. Up and down and back up again. Until the world was spinning around you, and even though everyone asked for a water break, one was not given. You all kept going. 

You went until you dropped, literally. Until you missed a step, fell forward, and smashed your head on the seat next to you. The pain in your whole body ceased, briefly, before it erupted again in your head, and then everything went black. 

-----

At least you could leave early without seeming like a coward. No one could argue against the decision the team doctors had come to; you had a large gash on your forehead that needed stitches, a black eye, and a mild concussion. Your coach sneered at you, but dismissed you all the same, leaving you with a warning to remember to keep the team’s best interest in mind. You knew this meant that he expected you to remain silent, as you had been until this point. You planned to. What you didn’t necessarily plan for was your club teammates. You should have considered them, but you didn’t. That was your second mistake. The first was barely responding to anyone’s texts and calls after the article was published. You didn’t even tell anyone you were going home. Deciding the medical announcement from the team would be enough, you boarded your flight to Barcelona, completely ignoring the flood of messages you were receiving. 

You just wanted to go home. Lay in your bed where you were safe, and far from the people that seemed hell bent on making your life a living hell several weeks out of the year. You didn’t want to talk, you didn’t want to see anyone. You ignored the multitude of texts from Pina, Patri, Mapi, Alexia, and Marta, asking you if you needed a ride home from the airport. You Ubered home from the airport instead, barely making it through your door before you tossed your bag aside and collapsed into your bed. 

In order to avoid a break in from your teammates, you pulled your phone out before you fell asleep, opening your text thread with Alexia. 

Nena, I saw the article. Call me.

Are you okay?

Please respond, nena, we’re really worried about you.

Jona called, I heard about your injury. Are you okay?

When are you coming home?

When does your flight land?

Nena, please. Just message something to let me know you got home okay. 

You sighed. You didn’t want to talk. Talking would only make it worse, you were sure. It hadn’t been that bad, not really. It was normal, a little harsh, but the team had been playing so poorly, what did you all expect? Rationalizing it was all you could do, really. 

Hola Capi. I’m okay, I’m home now. Everything is fine, really. Don’t worry. 

Alexia responded barely a minute after you’d hit send. 

Okay, nena. If you need to talk, we’re all around for you, okay? Please, please call me if you need me, for anything. We can talk more tomorrow when you come for your medical eval. It’s at 9am and Mapi and I have media stuff then, but Pina and Patri are going to pick you up. Rest a lot, I’ll see you tomorrow. 

Even though you were comfortably curled up in bed, incredibly sleep deprived, and concussed, you couldn’t fall asleep right away. You were rather busy trying to figure out how to act tomorrow. You felt so… weighed down from everything that had happened. You looked in the mirror barely recognizing yourself, and it had nothing to do with your injuries. You didn’t feel like you. You felt like the empty version of yourself that always returned from national duty, but 10x worse. You didn’t think you could smile if you tried. Convincing your teammates that you were okay was going to take a lot of energy that you simply didn’t have. You couldn’t do it, you were too exhausted, in the very core of your being. You fell into a fitful sleep, setting your alarm for the next morning even though it was only early evening and you hadn’t eaten anything. You weren’t sure how to act, or how to play this. All you knew was that letting anyone see how badly you were hurting was not an option. 

-----

Your car ride to the Barça training grounds was painfully quiet. Pina and Patri had given up all attempts at making conversation; you’d made it clear that you didn’t want to talk. Neither of them were sure what to make of you right now. Your voice was steady, your body language rigid. You had a pair of huge sunglasses on, though, and a hood tugged up over your head. Neither of them could get a good glimpse at your face, to check on your injuries, or to see how you were really feeling. They supposed this was the point. Their worry only grew when you caught Patri’s arm before heading to the medical center. Her and Pina were headed for the locker room, but they both stopped in their tracks, looking back at you. 

You wanted to thank them. Not just for picking you up, but for bringing you coffee and a granola bar, and the comforting way they both squeezed your hand when they saw you. 

“Thanks for driving me. I really appreciate it.” You said softly. You never spoke quietly; you were incapable of doing so, normally. Today, however, both girls had to lean in to hear what you were saying. 

“Of course.” Patri replied. Your eyes fell back to the floor underneath you, and you headed off without another word, leaving two very concerned teammates in your wake. 

Patri stopped Pina just before walking into the locker room, very suddenly pulling the younger girl into a tight hug and not letting go. 

“Patri. Why are you suffocating me?” Claudia asked after a minute. 

The midfielder didn’t let up. “She’s acting like you did. After the last international break. I really don’t like it.” She explained. 

Claudia pulled away, shaking her head. She didn’t like to think about that. “I’m fine, Patri. She’ll be fine too, yeah?” 

“Hope so.” Patri said, giving her best friend a smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes.

-----

Alexia and Mapi knew it was just as bad as they were expecting when they saw the looks on their younger teammates' faces. They’d finished media up as fast as they could, practically running to the gym where Pina and Patri were working out. 

It only took a shake of Patri’s head for both girls to whirl around, and set off for the medical center. 

You finished your eval at around the same time. The team doctors hadn’t asked too many questions. Jona had been there when you arrived, and had asked if there was anything you’d like to talk to him about. You’d shook your head, and he’d sighed, but left the room. The doctors had received the report from your national team’s staff. They knew that you’d fallen, but that was it. Nothing that accounted for the deep exhaustion that was clear across your face, or the way you barely spoke to them. They told you the same things that your national team had, giving you a rough timeline of your return. Finally, they very obviously reminded you of the club psychologist, before telling you that you were free to go. 

You were planning on waiting around somewhere secluded until Pina and Patri were done with their workout, stopping briefly to fill your water up. Your sunglasses were back on, hood pulled back up, depriving you of your peripheral vision, not to mention your rather swollen shut eye. 

When you turned, you jumped slightly, finding Mapi and Alexia standing directly behind you, arms crossed over their chests like a pair of bodyguards. If this was their goal, they had arrived late. The damage to you was already done. You weren’t sure the scars would ever fade.

Alexia stepped closer to you slowly , as if you would startle and run away from her if she moved too fast, pulling your hood down, and reaching for your sunglasses very carefully. 

“Ay dios mio” She murmured, taking your sunglasses off your face and carefully inspecting your wounds. “How did this happen?” 

Her voice was uncharacteristically shaky and full of fear, and her eyes bore into your own, a dangerous glint to them. Mapi didn’t look any different, standing next to her captain and eyeing you very carefully. 

“Fell.” You said simply. Not completely collapsing into their arms and telling them everything was much harder than you anticipated, so you stuck to one word answers for now. 

“You fell? What, off a cliff?” Mapi asked, ignoring the elbow to the ribs she received from the blonde next to her. 

You only shrugged in response, causing both girls to exchange a look. 

“Amiga, did someone do this to you? You can tell us, I promise. We will keep you safe.” Alexia promised, words she’d been rehearsing all morning. 

“No one did anything to me, I just fell.” You reiterated, and it wasn’t technically a lie. You were getting annoyed, uncharacteristically so. You didn’t want to answer these questions, and even though it was completely unfair, you were angry at Alexia. Promising to protect you now did nothing. Nothing at all. It was too late for that. You weren’t sure you’d ever feel safe again. 

“I do not believe you. You are not clumsy, you do not fall.” Mapi cut in, her words wildly more aggressive than her tone. You didn’t respond, back to staring at your feet. “The article that came out,” 

“It’s an exaggeration. Everything is fine. Nothing is wrong, everything is fine, and I just want to go home, okay?” You spit back, showing the most emotion you had all day. 

And though everything you’d said was clearly a lie, it was also clear you weren’t ready to talk. Mapi and Alexia had already decided to back off if you didn’t want to talk right now. It could wait until later, until you were somewhere you felt safe, and somewhere much more private than the hall outside Barcelona’s gym. This wasn’t the place. 

The older girls let you go with Patri and Pina, even though all of their instincts were telling them not to let you out of their sight. You were so jumpy, so obviously terrified, they couldn’t justify making you do something you didn’t want to right now.

Alexia watched you walk away with your teammates, startling slightly when she felt Mapi wrap her arms securely around the blonde. Mapi was holding tight to her best friend, and it was no secret as to why. Alexia hugged her back, just as tight. 

“She’s acting just like all the younger girls did after the Euros. It’s happening again, to her this time, and we can’t do anything to stop it.” Mapi mumbled. 

Alexia wanted to disagree, but she couldn’t. She wanted to promise Mapi that they’d fix it, but she wasn’t sure they had the power to. Watching someone you love suffer is always hard, and this was no different.  It seemed so out of their control, and it was excruciating to watch the effects of whatever happened at that national camp wreak havoc on you, and know they couldn’t stop it. 

------

The ride home was just as quiet as the ride there had been. This time, though, the girls didn’t let you go without speaking. The tension in the car had been different this time, and you knew one of them was planning to say something. You thought it would be Patri; she was one of the captains, she was older, you were closer with her. To your surprise, it was Pina that spoke up. 

Patri had just pulled into your driveway when Pina turned around, looking hesitantly at you. Maybe it was her clear anxiety that made you listen, really listen to what she had to say. 

“I don’t know exactly what’s going on, but I can tell you aren’t okay. I just wanted to say that talking about it is way less painful than keeping it all inside. Everyone wants to help you, and I know you might feel embarrassed, or like you can handle it yourself, but you shouldn’t have to. We’re all here for you, whether you want to talk, or you just need some company. Okay?” 

You could tell it had taken a lot for Pina to say all that. She didn’t talk about her experience, ever, unless it was to Mapi or Patri, and even then, she preferred to pretend it hadn’t happened. She was putting that aside for you, though, and you couldn’t ignore the significance of that. 

“Thanks Clau. Really, thank you.” You said, reaching out to squeeze her arm, before stepping out of the car. It was all you could manage right now, but you hoped it got your point across. 

It did. And even though tears welled in Claudia’s eyes on the way home, and she clung to Patri’s hand rather tightly, she was glad she’d spoken up. It was what she’d needed to hear all those months ago, and she hoped that it would make things easier for you. 

-----

You were curled up on the floor near your couch when you made the decision. Tremors were wracking your whole body, and you had been crying for so long that your chest hurt. It seemed that everything had caught up with you, but the breaking point had been the message from your national team coach, reminding you, again, to think of the team, and to stay out of the public eye until your visible injuries healed. There was no please, no thank you. It was just assumed that you’d do it. That really got you; that you’d been pliant for them for so long that they didn’t doubt that you’d go along with whatever they told you to. 

You just felt so alone, and so scared. So incredibly scared. It was this fear that had you reaching for your phone. You couldn’t do it anymore, couldn’t keep it all in. You couldn’t tell another lie, and you didn’t want to. You just wanted someone to come and tell you that everything was going to be okay. You wanted someone to protect you, in the way you should have been protected this whole time. 

There were people that you trusted to do this for you, and you’d lost all the strength to deny yourself the comfort and the care you ached for. 

The phone had barely rung once before it was picked up. 

“Nena? Are you okay?” Alexia asked softly. 

“No,” you replied, your voice barely more than a sob. 

“Oh, cariño. What can I do?” 

“Come over, please. I can’t do this alone anymore.” You gasped out, wiping harshly at the tears streaming down your face. 

“I am on my way, pequeña, okay? Just sit tight, Mapi and I will be there in a few minutes.” 

“Okay,” you said miserably. You hung up the phone, curling up against the side of the couch once again, muffling your cries in the cushions next to you. It felt like you might never stop crying. 

-----

The sight that Alexia and Mapi were met with when they walked through your front door wasn’t one they ever wanted to see again. 

You were curled in on yourself on the floor, gasping and clawing at your chest as you cried, looking so panicked, and so terrified, neither of them were very confident that they’d be able to help you. Alexia was at your side in an instant, physically pushing your coffee table out of the way so she could crouch down next to you, and pull you into her arms. 

“Okay, okay. It’s alright. You are safe, nena, I promise you.” She murmured, allowing you to hide your face in her neck. You were still trembling, still sobbing, when Mapi sat down next to the two of you, looking helplessly at her captain. 

You couldn’t speak, even though you kind of wanted to. You were so overwhelmed and so exhausted, the only thing keeping you from really dissolving into an irreversible state of panic being Alexia’s arms around you, and her and Mapi’s voices in your ear. 

They promised, over and over, that you’d be safe, that they’d keep you safe. You supposed the only way they’d be able to do this was if you told them everything. And even though it terrified you to do so, the thought of going back to camp next break like nothing had happened was paralyzing. 

You had to trust Alexia and Mapi. You didn’t think you’d be able to keep going if you didn’t trust them, if you didn’t let them in. You resolved to talk, to be honest, as soon as you were able. As soon as you stopped crying. You weren’t sure when that would be, honestly, because it didn’t seem like you were calming down at all. For now, you gripped Mapi’s hand, focused on the feeling of Alexia’s hand on your back, and willed yourself to be calm. They had you. They’d keep you safe. 

----- 

[etherealising]

chapter two | the weight of existing

↢ previous chapter | next chapter ↣

pairings: platonic!mikey berzatto x fem!reader | carmen berzatto x fem!reader (future)

summary: you and carmy try to get to the bottom of your issues, only for carmy to sow further division between you two, leading you to share some unwelcome thoughts regarding life with mikey.

warnings: angst? | talk of no longer existing (su!c!de) | probably ooc characters | language (cussing) | wonky timeline (b/c time doesn’t exist to me apparently) | so much pseudo sibling love that i’m not ready for mikey’s exit : ( | please don’t hesitate to let me know if i missed anything!

wc: 4.5k

You had been at the Berzatto family home for an hour now, and everything was in absolute chaos. You thanked your lucky stars for growing up around this family. If this had been your first time spending a holiday with them, you were sure your fight or flight alarms would be blaring right now. You had been in the kitchen with Donna ever since your and Carmy’s stifled meeting earlier in the evening.

You loved Donna, really you did, and you appreciated everything she did for you when your mom couldn’t. But if you knew anything by being an honorary member of the Berzatto family, you knew that being in the kitchen with Donna during the holidays wasn’t the most pleasant of places to be. And you saw your perfect escape when Carmy entered the kitchen, removing Donna’s attention from you and the conversation about how the world of journalism was treating you since you last came home in November.

Your eyes caught Carmy’s as he was swept into his mom’s explanations about what needed to go in the oven and when. You flashed a smile nodding as a sign of encouragement, you were rewarded with a small twitch of his lips before you disappeared into the hallway intending to take a lap around the house and greet the other guests scattered around the house.

The body leaning against the kitchen wall, seemingly trying to become one with the wallpaper caught your attention. Upon further inspection, you realized it was Natalie, a face you were more than happy to see after being in the same house together for over an hour. You gently brushed your hand across her shoulder doing your best not to startle her, her head shot up worry inked in her blue eyes, a deep breath leaving her as she took in whose presence was invading her space.

“Hey Baby,” The slight uptick of her lips showed you just how exhausted she already was, her eyes searching yours for any answers regarding the constant worries shooting through her mind. “How’ve you been, are you alright, I know mom can be a bit much during the holidays.” You let out a small chuckle pulling the older girl into a much-needed hug for the both of you.

“Do you ever take a moment to stop worrying about everyone else and focus on yourself?” You asked her pulling back slightly to further take in her appearance. You loved Nat dearly, she was pretty much the sister you never had, but you hated how she would run herself dry trying to fix everything for everybody else.

You squeezed her hand that was still clutched in yours letting her know that she wasn’t alone and could rely on you if need be. You pushed a stray piece of hair out of her face watching as she leaned her head back against the wall taking a moment for herself. “You worry about everyone Nat, but who worries about you love?” You questioned, and she knew this was no rhetorical question, you expected a genuine answer.

Allowing Nat to take in your words you walked around to the other side of her to lean against the wall next to her, she turned her head watching you take up a similar position as she. “Are you reciting lines from a self-help book?” Your eyes met hers watching as the edges crinkled signifying the smile she now wore, you huffed letting out a chuckle and knocking your shoulder into hers.

“You’re laughing Nat, but I’m serious. And even if I did steal that line from some book, I think it applies scarily well to you Sugar.” The last words spilled from your lips in a sarcastic tone, your eyebrows raising as she rolled her eyes at the sound of her nickname bestowed upon her by her Berzatto counterparts.

“I made a mistake Baby, you chose your nickname.” Nat deadpanned

You laughed, the sound drowned out by whatever conversation everyone else in the house was having. “You tell me what teenage girl didn’t have a crush on Johnny Castle, I will forever cherish your mom for letting me watch Dirty Dancing on my 14th birthday.” You sighed dreamily watching as Natalie shook her head at your antics.

“Baby, that is such a lame excuse,” Nat laughed, turning to face you. “You literally wouldn’t answer to anything else but Baby for a whole week after your birthday. Need I remind you, you took your obsession further and dressed up for Halloween as Baby.” She laughed, her voice filled with what you realized was a reminiscent tone, “I can’t believe you suckered Mikey into dressing up as Johnny though.”

You smiled remembering back to the exact Halloween she was talking about, “Carmy’s head was too far up his ass to dress up with me.” You huffed recalling how Carmy swore up and down that he was too old to dress up anymore. “Plus I think Mikey just did it to make me feel better, that was around the time my mom was having all her health issues.” You shrugged not thinking too much about Mikey’s motivations.

You finally turned to face Natalie, your positioning mirroring hers, “What do you say we find your mom’s old photo albums and hang out with Tiff for a few.” You suggested holding your hand up as Nat was about to give you some excuse to not take a beat for herself. “Shut up Nat your moms will be fine she’s got Ratatouille in the kitchen with her and about a hundred fucking bums in the living room.” Your dig at Carmy brings a slight smile to her face.

The sound of dishes clattering in the kitchen caught your attention a mumbled “Fuck.” Meeting your ears followed by a more coherent “I don’t fucking come home to be compared to a fucking French rat.”

You shared a knowing smile with Natalie, the two of you giggling like school girls in the hallway outside of the kitchen, “I’ll grab the photo albums,” You heard Nat mumble as she walked in the direction you presumed Donna kept the family keepsakes. The minute Nat was out of your sight you let out a deep sigh, you couldn’t help the impending feeling that things were going to get a lot more hectic in the coming hours, and taking a minute to relax with Nat and catch up with Tiff was an out you were definitely looking to take advantage of. Resting your head back against the wall eyes closing as the minutes ticked by while you waited for Nat to collect you, you knew deep down that break wouldn’t be coming but holding on to the idea of a little calmness in a situation helped you fool yourself into believing everything would be alright.

“You good?” Your eyes shot open as the all too familiar voice of Carmen Berzatto filled your ears, though what should’ve alerted you to his presence was the scent of his cologne, a scent you hadn’t smelled in a very long time, yet somehow your body instinctively remembered. You looked to see him standing idly in the doorway of the kitchen, a fresh cigarette hanging from his lips. “Uh, I’m gonna get a quick smoke in, did you - I know you don’t smoke - but you look - and.” You cut his pathetic ramblings off, not quite in the mood to play finish the lyric with him.

“Yeah Carm, I’ll join you outside.” You nodded passing him by to head towards the door, being in the same vicinity as him after so long made you physically ache. And now that you had seen him and deduced that he was in good health, you couldn’t help but feel a little pissed off at the lack of contact between the two of you. No, it wasn’t even a lack of contact. Carmy dropped you like a bad habit and never looked back. As you made your way to the front porch you tried to reason with yourself that Carmy didn’t owe you anything, he didn’t owe you his friendship, or his time, no matter how long you two had known each other. If Carmen woke up one day and decided you were no longer an essential part of his life, he was well within his rights to do so, he was a grown man for crying out loud. But what you wouldn’t stand for, what your brain couldn’t allow you to accept was being cut off with no explanation, you were sure this whole situation between the two of you would’ve hurt less if he had just explained to you why you were no longer good for him.

And maybe you were lying to yourself, and the explanation would have actually made things worse, but you couldn’t change what already was. And as Carmy slowly made his way to follow you out of the house you decided today was the day you were getting answers, call it Carmy’s last-minute Christmas gift to you.

The two of you stood next to each other. A good distance between you two, Carmy respecting you enough to not smoke directly next to you. Carmy tried his hardest to not steal glimpses of you in his peripheral vision, but it was hard not to when you were standing there beside him. If times were different he might’ve reached out to touch you, to assure himself you were physically here with him. To remind himself of what once was between the two of you. What could no longer be?

“Uh-um how have you bee-”

“Why?” You interrupted him, not particularly in the mood for his avoidance tactics.

“Wha-what?” He turned to face you and you wanted to laugh, you weren’t sure if he was genuinely confused or acting incompetent so you’d be the one to apologize. You copied his stance, eyes tracing across every inch of his face, you gave in with a sigh. Carmy was never one to weaponize any incompetence he may have had, you weren’t even sure if he knew how.

“Why are you asking Carmen, do you actually care, or are you just trying to make small talk?” You watched as he removed the cigarette from between his lips, holding it in the hand furthest from you and turning his face in the opposite direction to release the nicotine-scented air from his lungs.

He ran his free hand through his hair, something that used to drive you crazy, but now standing in this moment with him you couldn’t be bothered to feed into the childhood crush your weak heart still harbored for him. “I-I care, I didn - it was never my intention to cut you off.” He said searching your eyes for any signs that you were listening to understand, and not just listening to rebuttal.

“We grew up together Carmen, if you didn’t want me in your life anymore you could’ve just told me.” You felt the telltale signs of tears welling up in your eyes, your eyes stinging as you fought hard to keep them from spilling.

“It wasn’t like that.” He scoffed his irritation becoming ever present, it wasn’t you he was irritated with, it was the fact that he knew exactly what he needed to tell you, wanted to tell you but he wouldn’t allow himself to. Carmy didn’t know how to express what was running through his mind right now without becoming a stuttering mess as his mind raced too fast for his mouth to keep up with.

You let out a sardonic laugh “That’s exactly what it felt like Carmen. I’m not gonna pretend to act like I know what your life is like right now, but the least you could do is shoot me a text letting me know you’re okay. Hell, it doesn’t even have to be consistent Carm, I jus-I care about you so much that it hurts.” You choked the words out not knowing how you could get him to understand how much his actions affected you.

“I mean, I know we went our separate ways, and I promise I’m not desperately trying to hang off you or some shit Carm, but yo-you just left me, and I was in a whole new place alone, and I felt like such a fucking fraud. And I needed you Carmen, I fucking needed you and…and the crazy part is you got every single one of my calls and texts, I fucking know you did.” You were ranting now and maybe it wasn’t fair to Carmy to drop this on him all at once, but what else were you supposed to do when you knew things would just resort to the way they’ve been once the holiday season was over and you were both back on your respective sides of the country.

“Listen, Baby, I’m sorry I kno-,”

“You promised Carmen,” The words slipped through your lips in a whisper so quiet it was almost lost to the wind. “You promised you would call me Carmen, and I know that may not have meant much to you, but it meant everything to me, you meant everything to me Carmen.” The wind had taken your voice and ran with it, Mother Nature doing her best to soothe the two broken souls before her.

Carmen closed his eyes tilting his head back to the sky, it was selfish, he knew it was the moment the thought crossed his mind, but those were the last words he wanted to ever hear from you. He took a second to try and collect the dozens of thoughts racing through his mind. Hoping to land on what he thought you wanted to hear, anything to soothe the indigestion starting to burn through his chest.

He came back to reality, eyes no longer looking in your direction, posture closed off signifying he was done with this conversation whether you agreed or not. He dropped the cigarette he had been holding the time wasted burning it down to the bud before taking a fresh one out of his pocket, cigarette lazily held between his lips as he brought his lighter up to the stick.

"He been treating you right?” He questioned head turning in your direction, but eyes never quite landing on your figure, as if he couldn’t stand to look at you.

And there it was exactly what you didn’t want to happen: Carmen's incessant need to avoid the tough conversations that he couldn’t help but make everyone else’s problem. You hastily patted your eyes to ensure any remaining tears didn’t make an appearance. “The fuck are you on about Carmen?” You snapped, having lost all desire to keep your emotions under control. No longer holding yourself back to appease whatever good nature was still between the two of you.

He gestured with his free hand back towards the house while sucking in a deep breath of tobacco and nicotine. “You and Mikey, I mea-it's just you two seemed pretty close earlier is all.” He chanced a glance in your direction, his soft blue eyes catching your stare before promptly turning away.

It took you a minute to digest what he was insinuating, a little offended that he deduced you to being Mikey’s bed warmer, all from whatever he thought he had been seeing this evening. If you were a violent person, you might’ve slapped him. You weren’t fucking Mikey and even if you were that was no longer Carmy’s business, he couldn’t just pick and choose the moments he wanted to make an appearance and provide input in your life.

You chuckled although the sound came out dry, no traces of humor to be found. You turned to Carmy and closed the distance between the two of you, snatching the cigarette from between his lips. You dropped it to the ground before stomping it out under the toe of your boot, “These things kill asshole.” You said before sauntering back towards the house, stopping a moment and turning to face him again, “And if I wanted to fuck your brother I don’t think I’d need your permission, Carmen.” With that, you entered the house leaving Carmy to stew with his thoughts and hopefully come to the conclusion that he made a bad situation even worse.

Carmy stayed outside a little while longer, he knew it was immature of him to avoid the conversation you wanted to have. He felt like a jackass for staring you in your face as he made the decision to disregard your feelings so easily. He kept telling himself he wasn’t a bad guy, a loop with those words playing in his brain as he did his best to convince himself. But what sort of fucking masochist breaks their own heart to escape the realities of a life he’ll never have. You were right, Carmen was an asshole but he knew he couldn’t continue to allow himself to want something as marvelous as love with you, he just wasn’t deserving. Not that he thought Mikey was any better of an option, but if it kept you in his life so be it.

You made your way through the house, looking for any space that you could compose yourself in, not wanting to ruin anyone else’s Christmas with your unpleasant mood. You did your best to quickly walk past the room containing the Fak Brothers and Steven. Any other time you would have sat comfortably next to Stevie as raptly intrigued as he was with the Fak family shenanigans. But in those potential instances, you also wouldn’t have been overthinking every decision you made regarding your friendship with Carmen and wondering why you were no longer good enough.

Continuing your journey through the house narrowly avoiding guests as you went, you quickly backtracked as you noticed a familiar back blankly facing the pantry. You felt bad for even letting the thought cross your mind, but you weren’t sure if Mikey was the right person to seek comfort in, especially after the accusation Carmy had just laid at your feet.

It was ridiculous actually to let something Carmy said have such an impact on you within such a short amount of type. It was even more ridiculous to allow his immaturity to overshadow the bond that had been carefully curated between you and Mikey prior to his youngest brother’s absence and now.

You let out a defeated sigh stepping slightly forward to wrap you arms around Mikey’s torso, cheek settling into the space between his shoulder blades, “Your little brother is a fucking idiot.” You murmured, voice slightly muffled by Mikey’s back.

A rough laugh escaped through Mikey’s lips as he patted your hand resting on his stomach, “Sure is when it comes to you ain’t he?” He questioned removing himself from your hold to lean his back against the pantry doorway. You followed suit standing opposite of him, the two of you now face to face.

You took in Mikey’s features, brows pinching together at the far away look in his eyes. It always amazed you that no matter if Mikey was physically in front of you, there was always a chance he was mentally somewhere else. That was the one similarity you could pick out between the two Berzatto boys, while Mikey’s charisma did a good job of hiding it, Carmen’s awkwardness put it on full display.

You reached out tugging at the sleeve of his shirt, “How are you doing Mikey?” You were genuinely curious, it's not like you were oblivious to Mikey’s many faults, the difference was you didn’t think he was a lost cause like everyone else. And as hard as it was to admit it to yourself you would never address the fact that you romanticized who Mikey was as a person. The Mikey you knew as a little girl was still the same Mikey you saw standing before you, and maybe he had a few more demons in his closet than you had been aware of back then, but it felt egregiously wrong to align your Mikey with the boogeyman everyone else made him out to be.

Mikey laughed swatting your hand away, “It's the most wonderful time of the fucking year Baby, how do you think I’m doing?” Mikey’s adversity in answering your question wasn’t lost upon you, but you knew Mikey wasn’t one to openly talk about how he was feeling. If avoidance was what you were gonna get, you knew there was no chance of this conversation going anywhere. You were 0 for 2 with the Berzatto brothers this evening it seemed.

You sighed, knocking your head against the wall you were leaning on, eyes shifting downwards as you prepared yourself for the topic you were about to bring up, “Can I ask you a question, Mikey? And can you be serious with me for one minute?” You pleaded needing someone to validate the way you had been feeling since your less-than-enlightening conversation with Carmy.

Mikey nodded eyebrows pinching together, a lick of concern tickling down his spine. Mikey knew you just as well as he knew his actual siblings. Albeit the age difference Mikey grew up right there with you, watching you grow into the person you were now, learning your mannerisms, understanding you as a person. You hadn’t asked for it but Mikey made it his mission to know you just as well as the younger Berzatto’s, if you were gonna be tossed into his eccentric family due to circumstance, he would do his best to treat you like a bonus little sister.

The slight nod of his head queuing you to reveal your query, “Do you ever feel, I don’t know, like inadequate?” You questioned scratching your nails against the material of your skirt, too consumed by the idea that Mikey would write your odd inquiry off. “Like sometimes it’s just exhausting to even fucking exist and-and there’s no rule book for this shit, but sometimes even your absolute best will never be good enough ya know? Like no matter how hard you try it doesn’t fucking matter because you’re just gonna die someday anyway?”

You chanced a glance at Mikey hoping he wouldn’t take your very real insecurities as a joke. The blank stare in his eyes greeted you by telling you a different story. Mikey was a hard person to read, and though you believed you had cracked the code to his complex soul, it was in moments like these that you knew you couldn’t be more wrong.

The sudden movement of Mikey’s hands reaching up to cup your face and jerk your head closer to him almost causes you to lose balance. “Why the fuck would you say that?” The tone in Mikey’s voice caused you to try and shrink into yourself. “This got anything to do with my shithead little brother?”

Your eyes cast downwards not prepared for the intensity in Mikey’s eyes, your lips parting to respond before abruptly being cut off by Mikey, “Fucking look at me when I’m talking to you, Baby. What’s going on in that pretty little head of yours?” His hands redirected your gaze to his with a more gentle approach.

You shrugged your shoulders, feeling stupid for even talking like this in front of Mikey, “I’m not sure, to be honest. I talked to Carmy, and it went as well as you would guess. And I just, I don’t know, I guess I just got lost in my head. And work has been so stressful lately, I’m even considering moving back here.” You shook your head from his grip, “It's just nonsense, don’t worry about me. I think seeing Carmy after so long just made me spiral.” You offered him a small smile hoping it was as reassuring as you thought it was.

Mikey pulled you into a hug chin resting atop your head. The scene was oddly reminiscent of the hug you shared hours ago on the porch. Mikey’s hugs were like magic, a bear hug so comforting and warm, his arms made you feel safe, and protected. You felt a little selfish for constantly dumping your problems on Mikey, but he had become your closest confidant, you wish the same could be said about you from Mikey’s point of view, but you were already lucky enough that he shared what little nuggets of the inner working of his life that he did with you.

Mikey pulled back hands settling on your shoulders to get a good look at you, “Don’t let me hear you say shit like that again alright Baby?” You nodded the corner of your lips curving slightly as Mikey played the role of big brother and began scolding you. “You’re a great fucking girl alright, and don’t even worry about Carmy, you’ve got a heart of fucking gold. You’re like that motherfucker with the gold touch alright, and I need you Baby okay? I need you and that means something right, you’re fucking adequate these fuckers in this house wish they were you.”

You laughed the melodic sound filling the space between the two of you, “King Midas.”

Mikey’s hands dropped from their position on your shoulders frowning at you, “Who the fuck is that?”

“The motherfucker with the gold touch,” You joked.

“Alright, you fucking smart ass.” Mikey reached up to flick your nose, a small gesture carried on from childhood.

The two of you stood in the other’s presence for what felt like forever, no words needing to be passed between you. You and Mikey enjoy being in each other's company, using the pantry as a place of solace before returning to reality. The sound of Donna’s voice yelling about saltines and Carmy’s responding yell breaks the peaceful moment between you both. You glanced in the pantry spotting the saltines Carmy would be coming to acquire a small sigh leaving your lips. If Carmy was going to avoid a much-needed conversation, you would just avoid him. Sure it was petty but you wanted him to somehow get a taste of the suffering his lack of effort caused you.

“Well, this has been fun, but I should make myself scarce before Carmen accuses me of fucking you in the pantry of your family home.” You shot Mikey a sarcastic smile preparing to find some other hole to hide in before family dinner commenced.

“My little brother is a fucking idiot,” Mikey mumbled moving out of the way to allow you to pass by. You laughed glad that someone agreed with astute observation skills. Deciding to check on Tiff you made your way to the stairs before stopping at the landing.

“Hey.” You turned back to Mikey catching his attention for a brief moment, if the raise of his eyebrows was any conformation. “I love you brother bear.” You shot him a wink then proceeded to continue your previously decided journey.

Mikey watched your figure disappear up the stairs, a solemn smile resting on his lips. The idea that you had at one point harbored such unnerving thoughts scared him. But what scared him, even more, was he knew exactly what you were talking about

a/n: so i’m a liar : )

i fully intended for this to be the last chapter of the christmas episode but my creative juices said no. alas here is chapter 2, but mark my words the next chapter will be the end of the christmas arc because baby i’m exhausted. please shower me with feedback (constructive criticism), it really helps feed my creativity. and while i would love likes/comments/reblogs please interact with my work however you feel comfortable, my ask box is always open 💜

also also this might be a little self-indulgent idk, i have the “existing is exhausting” convo like every weak : (

tag list: @chims-kookies | @rexorangecouny | @elliesbabygirl | @thecraziestcrayon | @anakinswh0re3005 | @allbark-no-bite | @landplantbloom | @khena

i just tagged whoever commented on chapter 1, so if you didn’t want to be on the tag list sorry! but if you would like to be tagged in the next update please let me know!!

strikethrough means i was unable to tag you : (

[0cta9on]

https://video.twimg.com/amplify_video/1744333798341558272/vid/avc1/720x968/5FWrOIbGZIm_AKST.mp4

Can we get a kinda fluffy mile high Winter smut while you're in the air pretty please!

I love it when girls do the nose scrunch thing, it's so cute and Winter is no exception :))) This is unedited btw but I hope you like it regardless!!

“Oppa… Manager oppa…”

You feel Winter gently nudge your shoulder while you’re trying to sleep. Annoyed, your eyelids creep open, glaring back at her.

“What is it, Winter?”

After SM assigned you to manage their newly debuted girl group four years ago, you figured it would be an easy job, and at first, it was. Rookie Aespa was fairly easy to handle. They were all pretty timid at first, and you were more than welcome to help them navigate the treacherous idol industry. However, once the girls got used to you being around, they immediately turned into little monsters. Always running around and screaming, it was less a manager job and more a babysitting job at this point. You were constantly exhausted, even more so now that their skyrocket to fame meant constant overseas schedules.

“Oppa~” Winter groans cutely, trying to ease the tension. “I need… help.”

“Help with what? Just ask the flight attendant.” You turn your body away from her and shut your eyes. She vigorously nudges your shoulder, the sensation not unlike a cat pawing you to get your attention.

“I need a different kind of help,” she whispers, a lilt of a smirk in her voice. The tickle of her breath against your ear is enough to fully wake you up. Without another word, you grab Winter’s hand and take her to the nearest lavatory, the petite girl struggling to hide her excitement amongst all the sleeping passengers. One of the benefits of working with Aespa is that their sexual appetites are insatiable. Even Karina, who recently snagged herself a pretty successful boyfriend, still asks you to fuck her in the hotel after overseas schedules.

After ensuring that the coast is clear, the two of you sneak into the cramped airplane restroom. She pushes you against the toilet and straddles your lap. Even with no makeup on and a mask covering half her face, you still think she’s the prettiest girl in Aespa.

“You’re so cute, you know that?” You say, smiling up at her. Winter giggles, scrunching her nose at you.

“Are you just saying that to get into my pants?” She teases,” Because it’s working.” She tosses the mask away and gently smashes her lips against yours. Even at her horniest, Winter’s movements are always so soft. It’s what you like most about her. Unlike the other girls, who prefer rough, senseless fucking, Winter enjoys taking her time and ensuring both of you enjoy the experience of lovemaking.

The taste of her cherry chapstick fills your mouth - her signature flavor. Your hands wrap around her petite waist as she begins to grind her hips against your crotch, moaning into your mouth. The chorus of whimpers is music to your ears. As much as you would love to stay in this position forever, you couldn’t risk getting caught in here. With a quick zip, you discard her bulky jacket that hid the real treasure underneath.

“You’re so pretty, baby,” you say. Her cheeks turn a princess shade of pink from the mere sound of a pet name. Pet names are Winter’s biggest weakness - baby, honey, love, the simple utterance of a single word will make her melt into your hands.

“Oppa~” she giggles, biting her lip. Like a switch flipped on in her head, her body reacts to the word immediately by grinding harder on your crotch, your cock begging to be broken free.

You gently take her off your lap and unzip your pants while Winter watches you excitedly.

“You like it, baby?” You smirk as you rub your length in front of her eyes. Without a word, she lowers her leggings and plants her hands against the wall, presenting her plump ass towards you.

“Please, oppa~” She begs cutely. “I wanna feel your thick cock inside me.” Her eyes watch intently as move her damp panties to the side to expose her dripping honey pot. You lubricate your length with her juices, enjoying the way Winter’s face twitches as you tease her entrance. Finally, you firmly grab her hips and slowly impale her onto your cock. Her mouth forms an “O” as struggles to keep herself from moaning.

“O-oh my god… Y-yes…” She whispers, her breath shivering. Each thrust is slow, but deep, savoring the grasp of her velvet walls around your member. No matter how many times you fuck her, each time is always better than the last. Your fingers sink into her soft flesh as pure bliss takes over your body.

“I love your pussy, baby,” you whisper sweetly into her ear. “Out of all the girls, yours is my favorite.”

“R-really?!” Her eyes light up at the compliment, inadvertently increasing the grip of her walls around your cock. A groan escapes your lips as you thrust harder and faster into her wetness, forcing you to cover her mouth to keep her from moaning too loudly.

“Of course, baby. Fuck, I love you so much Winter.” The sudden confession sends the idol into a lustful spiral. She bucks her hips backwards, meeting your every thrust, while she sucks your fingers like a pacifier. You prepare to pull out as the pressure in your loins begins to build towards your climax.

“Winter, I’m about to cu-”

“Cum in me, oppa!” She exclaims way too loudly. “I want you to fill me up! My pussy is yours to claim!” Your mind is too far gone to give a damn about the consequences. With one final thrust, you slam your entire length down her pussy, shooting your cum as far down into her as you possibly can. Winter reaches climax at the same time, her juices leaking out of her full pussy and onto her thighs. That single moment is the closest you’ll ever be to Heaven, both mentally and physically.

Your body nearly crashes against the other side of the restroom as you pull out. Winter catches the combination of your fluids leaking from her pussy and brings it to her tongue, swirling it in her mouth.

“Tasty,” she comments, winking at you. Once both of you catch your breaths, you peek outside the restroom only to be met with some scrawny looking boy who gives you a knowing smirk. Sighing, you rummage through your wallet and slap a $100 bill in his hand.

“You heard nothing,” you say to him before grabbing Winter’s hand and leading her back to your seats.

[williamsonarssnal]

𝐒𝐈𝐋𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐒𝐏𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆 | L.W (part.1)

SILVER SPRING ⸻ leah williamson x swimmer!reader.

warning: angsty, mentions of marriage, heartbroken (L & R), confused (R). English isn't my first language!

In London, the vibrant city that pulsated to the rhythm of football, Leah Williamson shone like the Sun, illuminating the Emirates Stadium with her grit and talent. Y/n, on the other hand, an Olympic swimmer, was the Moon, gliding through the crystal-clear waters of the pool with the grace and strength of a celestial body.

Leah, the fearless captain of Arsenal, was admired by crowds, her radiant smile and unwavering leadership making her an icon of the sport. Y/n, on the other hand, conquered the world with her perseverance and discipline, each stroke bringing her closer to Olympic glory.

Though Leah and Y/n admired each other from afar, their worlds seemed to coexist in different orbits, like the Sun and the Moon. Leah, always surrounded by spotlights and applause, craved a quiet and cozy love. Y/n, dedicated to her passion for swimming, saw marriage as an obstacle to her freedom and dreams.

One day, fate brought them together at a charity event. Leah, enchanted by Y/n's beauty and determination, approached timidly. Y/n, admired by Leah's strength and humility, felt an unexpected connection.

"Hi, I'm Leah," she shouted over the loud music.

"Y/n, nice to meet you, England captain."

"The pleasure's all mine, gold medalist."

Over conversations and secret meetings, Leah and Y/n discovered a deep and sincere love, a feeling that transcended societal expectations. But, like the Sun and the Moon, they also carried their own dreams and ambitions.

Leah, wanting a future with Y/n, proposed marriage. Y/n, overwhelmed by the love she felt, found herself in a dilemma. Her heart belonged to Leah, but her soul longed for the freedom of the water.

"I can't, Leah."

"What?"

"I can't focus on starting a family with you right now."

Leah was still in shock by the woman in front of her's response. She was sure Y/n loved her with the same intensity. She was sure she was doing the right thing, the woman just got up and walked towards the door, since clearly the movie had been ruined. Y/n, on the other hand, sat on the cold living room floor while her shared dog lay on her legs trying to comfort her. Marvin was a Golden Retriever that Leah had given her for her birthday after finding out how much she loved the breed, he was a constant reminder of how much Leah cared about her and how they were already a family. This crazy decision of hers was already affecting their son.

She was already regretting her actions and how she was being arrogant putting her career above her perfect relationship, but now it was too late and Leah was probably at Lia's or some teammate's house. Tears streamed down her face, she was feeling so stupid for letting the love of her life walk away.

Days went by and Leah still hadn't spoken to her or even sent a message, she was living on autopilot. She entered the club without greeting any teammates and just changed in silence, training non-stop. In addition to taking advantage of the times when Lia asked to pick up Marvin to stay with Leah for a week and since the dog was shared she agreed immediately starting to accept the end of her relationship. Lia was angry at what she did to her best friend, but sad to see her state as she packed the dog's things.

"You're an airhead, girl," she said, and you just shrugged, trying to ignore the woman's words, just smiling faintly when your dog barked trying to get your attention. "Don't ruin your family, he needs you two together." You looked at her a little surprised, not knowing what to say, just lowering your head as you both walked away.

It was exactly a week after Marvin left and without the dog at home you spent more time training until the peak of exhaustion, doing several laps of different strokes each time wanting to break your record. Your cell phone was on silent so no one could disturb you, you were swimming butterfly and it was clear how much you liked the stroke, your favorite, you had such a great facility. The adrenaline was pumping through her veins, pushing her to surpass her limits. But then, a sharp pain shot through her calf. A relentless cramp seized her, paralyzing her movements.

Panic took hold of S/n. She tried to fight the pain, but it was futile. Her arms grew heavy, her legs refused to obey. She began to sink, the crystal-clear water turning into a suffocating nightmare.

In her last moments of consciousness, images of her life floated through her mind: the Olympic glories, Leah's love, the promise of a future together. Anguish and regret gripped her. She had sacrificed everything for her dream, but now, with death lurking, she realized that Leah's love was what mattered most.

[sweetdreamsbuck]

napping on the couch together if you feel so inclined 🥺💖

I'm here

bucky x f!reader (gif not indicative of reader description)

w.c: 2.5k

a/n: Col, this strayed far from what it was originally meant to be, but I couldn't help myself. I hope you enjoy it<3

𝐢 𝐝𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞, 𝐜𝐨𝐩𝐲, 𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤.

Bucky’s never been one to be overbearing, in any way.

Protective and doting, certainly– never so that his attentive means of care made you feel anything but cherished, supported, grounded.

Your Bucky.

Meeting you, loving you, allowing something so priceless into his world, has changed everything for him. There’s a burning need to be the one constant in your life that knows you. To be the man who can take the pressures of the world from off of your shoulders with ease, weaving himself around every twinge of sadness, eclipsing all murmurs of insignificance and unrest, until all you know is the weight of his breath shouldering your heart.

“You listenin’ to me?” it’s not a question he ever finds himself asking, but tonight, his girl’s exhausted. Completely drained. And she came home with the wind knocked out of her lungs and harrowing sobs strangling her light.

Those familiar knuckles, vibranium and oh-so purposeful, stroked along your cheeks while rosy concern emanated from the swells of his own. Bucky finds it necessary now– their delicate dance of outlining the shape of your nose, smoothing the lines of distress and the tremble of your lips resting against his muscles– they’re the culprit of what coaxed your eyes shut in mere seconds.

His hands wield so much power– fragile, firm, thrilling tenderness you weren’t sure existed anywhere else outside of his touch. Impossible not to surrender to, falling deeper and deeper under his protection. But it’s purely selfish now how desperate Bucky is to touch you, to quell every fiber of worry or unease with the brush of his palm. He lives for the moment your body relaxes under his care, all tension and pain evaporating within the caress of his love. “Someone ready for bed?”

His voice is a whisper, a warm and honeyed heaven blanketing every inch of you. How a man of his size embodies the breeze of gentle winds rustling through blades of grass, well. You never have to wonder.

A fearsome beauty to behold, otherworldly– Bucky shines, burnished and ethereal; all of the terrifying Angel you know him to be.

The patter of freezing rain and rough winds plaguing the windows reminded you of how safe you were inside the life you shared. After all the isolating thoughts, after all the feelings of restless insignificance swimming round and round between your ears– Bucky’s here, soothing it all. Erasing any lingering struggle to find your footing, leaving nothing but the ghost of worshiping lips with husky whispers of how proud he is of you, how desperately he loves you with indescribable devotion rushing from his soul.

Each stroke, each breath, each kiss that danced along your skin echoes the sentiment of words Bucky’d shower you with until the day his heart stopped “Oh my sweet girl, I’m here.”

Crying had never felt so safe than while enveloped in his arms, strong hands soothing long paths along your tense back, lips falling protectively against your temple. He touches you as if you're the very thing that lights the sky; his words are hardly enough to prove how much of a miracle you are. Because to him, you are.

His miracle.

His pink lips barely leave your skin as his words sink in– a devastating touch each inch and scar of your being knows; Bucky’s kiss is final. And it lives within each curve, each insecurity, each smile, each ugly secret he knows took all the trust in the world to let him see, loving them enough for the both of you and then some– “I’m here, I’m here, I’m here.”

Bucky’s lips brand the words permanently, in absolution with tremors of his vigorous desire to be everything for you. “I got you. Whatever you need, let me,”– you need him, always.

Tonight hadn’t been any different. After what felt like hours of being shielded by his unwavering tenderness, of sobbing into his chest so rawly Bucky swore he felt his heart shredding in two, trying his hardest to catch all of you and never let go– resting your eyes for a moment against his stomach seemed to be just what you needed. Your head shook against thick muscle, his relaxing fingers slowed at your hairline, “N’am not, not tired. Just keep talking.”

Cool metal etched silent promises down to your hip, his piercing gaze staring at you with that look– the one that says he’s perfectly intent on staying like this, loving you, holding you until the messy and unforgiving world made a bit more sense. He needs it more than you most of the time. And then he’d get to hold you some more; knowing the overwhelming emotion he felt every time he looked at you was at peace within your veins.

“Really?” that deep voice crooned, playful, “‘Cause I think, you’re fallin’ asleep on me.”

Work had been hell the past few weeks while feelings of being alone were at an all-time high. Between wrestling with self-doubt, a workload that had somehow weaseled its way into your life and into the nightmares that kept you tossing and turning, all of the yelling and berating that shook you to your core because of mistakes that were entirely out of your control– of course. It was impossible not to.

You were falling asleep on the gentle thing you could never, ever, get enough of immersing yourself in. The one thing that proved time and time again, you could never be alone while Bucky still had air filling his lungs.

And maybe that’s why it’s so effortless to do so. The one thing that saw all of your broken pieces, the sharp edges you felt would threaten even the strongest– Bucky saw them, could paint them all by name like the scars marring his own body. He held them so tenderly, cherished each piece of you that you deemed burdensome so fiercely; nothing about you was a burden. Bucky admired all of you, desired all of you with a fervent need. It made your head spin, it made you feel whole.

“I’m not, just wanna hear your voice. Promise, I’m awake.” Bucky could hardly find it in himself to blink, not when your lips spread in a sweet smile he hadn’t seen in weeks. So small, so muted compared to the brilliance that nearly brought him to his knees every damn time he was in the presence of one. But it’s yours. “Please…”.

It’s weakening, mesmerizing, the bruise you leave with every display of your love. The serum only makes a man so strong; he’d never get enough of the way you wounded him.

Bucky gleams, and if you weren’t so spent, you’d see the air of ease filling his chest, the expanse of his shoulders quaking with reprieve.

Just when you thought you’d known everything there was to know about being seen, guarded by your very own earth angel, his hand closed around yours, tugging it gently to rest against his sternum. Bucky closed his eyes, leaning down to rest his nose within your knuckles. Inhaling, pulling you apart by the very seams and mending all at once– it seemed almost silly, how necessary his lips feel claiming the skin of your fingers, but your body felt the sensitive accusation of his kiss tenfold, “Even here. I’m here, too.”

You couldn’t stop the tears that blurred your vision if you tried.

There’s a lilt, always, pleasant and solid in his sigh when his eyes meet yours, your nerves buzzing from the way he always breathes you in vying for more. Vibranium tickles the tears under your eyes with adoration, a confirmation, he’d let you pretend you’re not falling asleep, that you really wanted to listen to him ramble on and on– so long as he gets to wound you, too.

That’s all you’ll ever need.

Your body knows, even on the cusp of sleep it craves him. More him, always more. His warmth, his support, the irresistible smell of his skin that always comes before relief. It slowly shifts, uncurling itself from the dip of the couch and closer to where Bucky’s fingers concealed your own.

His hands revel in that, it’s all they itch for; guiding your frame closer until your body collapses with deliverance, lashes teasing against his skin while your breathing slowed even more.

His eyes certainly never risk closing when you burrow further into his chest, hiding that exhausted pout within the shadows of his neck just above rough scar tissue. How could he miss even a second?

The echo of your heart mirrored the air puffing down his neck with every exhale sighed and it’s a revelation. Bucky revels in how perfect it feels to be wanted, to be trusted so deeply by the person who fills every color of his life with undying affection. He takes none of it for granted, especially not the soft hums the most distracting lips fall to adorn his throat with.

And then they melt on his skin, the featherlight promise of Bucky’s miracle resting against his pulse, again and again and again– it’s hardly his fault a shiver eases down his spine. Those damn lips. He’ll never be able to find language to express to you how good it feels, how addicting you are.

He’d do anything for you, be anything for you.

“Alright, sweet girl,” those strong hands wrap around your waist, plush lips greeting your eyelids with a dynamic song that sings I’m here. It’s okay to let go, let go, sweet girl. Let me love you. You’ve heard it countless times– have felt it endlessly since the first moment you invited him in behind those towering, frightening walls of your heart. But it’s soft, orchestrated with vulnerable direction, scruff-laced harmonies whispered against every inch of you, ostinato declarations of desire with a certain timbre only you know the key of “I’ll take care of you, just let me love you.”

“You’re gonna have to hear all about my perfect girl, but I can do that. Jus’let me hold you right.” The couch pillows already share the imprint of your body pressed up against his, of countless hours of entwined limbs and thick muscles sheltered within your arms. Yet, it always feels new, a different welcome each time, somehow more familiar than the last.

Bucky rearranged you both lying with his back nestled in the cushions, cradling you right atop his heart. “She’s so bright, the smartest.” Long fingers lifted under your chin, catching your eyes in their fight to stay open.

“And she’s the kindest soul, swear she’s made of stars.” He couldn’t help himself; that breathtaking glimmer washing so peacefully over your face, the trying lift of your mouth; he smoothed the pad of his thumb across your bottom lip before placing a kiss just under your nose, “beautiful,” on the plump of your cheek, “so, so beautiful,” on the corner of your mouth, “precious”. Bucky’s lips meld so softly with your own, your breath tasting of surrender, of bliss.

A sniffle slipped out, once then twice. “Strong. So damn strong,” a third time is when your body followed through with its fate, shaking slightly against him.

The way he holds you, knows you, worships you, leaving no room for questioning the torrents of emotion he treads– it’s maddening. Bucky walks with the years of his own pain, yet bleeds with the certainty of just how easy it is to love you, to devour you whole with the joyous bruise of being loved in return.

“Shh hey, hey…what?” he worried, rubbing a calloused thumb from your quivering lip all the way to your creased forehead.

“What what?”

Forced bemusement of his concern rumbled delightedly beneath you, “You’re okay,” his nose bumped against yours, lips following, “but what’s goin’ on in that pretty head of yours, hm?” Bucky’s nose wiggled down to behind your ear, peppering quick pecks on the skin there until you were squirming.

You giggled– oh god you fucking giggle and Bucky’s ruined. It erupted, and he felt it everywhere; goosebumps, swirling until they bled so potent beneath his skin. Nothing else could matter more than the promising sound of the home he’s allowed himself to live in.

“I don’t know,” he feels it in your eyes– so telling of the devotion Bucky deserves– honest, and they can’t seem to get enough of the curve of his nose, the freckles that dance along the high points of his concerned features. Those serene, startling blue eyes. Always seeing you, always longing for you.

Home. Your Bucky.

“I’m just so tired.”

Bucky would relive every moment he’s endured to always know what it feels like to be loved by you, to be clung to in your most vulnerable of states, with glazed-over eyes tormented and drowsy, to know of the rapture that exists in holding you tight until the air drowning your lungs is full of his love, of soothing breaths. To nurture you, accept your feelings and emotions with open hands, however they may present themselves.

He wants it all. Just you.

Bucky could only pull you closer, breathing you in as plump lips gently lay on your forehead, resolute arms embracing you with reverence.

He clears his throat, ready for you to listen, “Sometimes, I wonder how I got here. You know how special this is to me? The light of my dreams, so damn comfortable in my arms. Did’ya know that? Used to dream of you,” his knuckles swiped away the remaining wet trails from your face, calloused fingers softly spidering along your shoulders.

“Really? My Bucky?”

My Bucky– god he could burst.

The flush spreading along his cheeks hardly phased him, he nestled his nose against you further, nodding.

“Didn’t ever get to see you, but I know it. Had to be you, watching over me. Better than I could have even imagined. Sweetest damn eyes, hurts my chest a little just thinking about going a whole lifetime without ever knowing them. Prettiest heart in the whole world, you save me a little more every time I look at ya. When I get to hold you. You have no idea what you are to me.”

Me? your tongue attempted. It comes out as more of a yawn, already asleep.

“All I ever needed. Lucky bastard I am, huh?” Bucky hates how the world seems to take your compassion for granted, walking all over your kindness as if it’s expendable. It’s not. Not even a little bit. God only knows the serenity it’s granted him, of the fresh air it’s offered Bucky to live within each day.

“You’re the first thing I’ve had in a long time. And you make me feel whole, capable. I could be myself, learn to, at least. Not… disappear. Could never do that, not now. I have years to make up for, a whole life to live. A home to get back to at the end of the day. And I got the sweetest thing in the whole damn universe to love. You got no idea…”

A questioning whimper of his name rumbles against his throat, safe and asleep in the soundness of his chest.

“M’right here, sweet girl. I got you.” Your Bucky, he thought.

The rain kept pouring, the night remained dark and chilled, but all Bucky could focus on was the heart beating warmly against his own. He counted your breaths as they landed safely within his black and gold shoulder– the only metal that would ever know the enormity of what a miracle you were– just as his eyelids drift closed.

<3

“M’right here, sweet girl. I got you.” Your Bucky, he thought.

The rain kept pouring down, the night remained dark and chilled, but all Bucky could focus on was the heart beating warmly against his own. He counted your breaths as they landed safely within his black and gold shoulder; the only metal that truly knew the enormity of what a miracle you were; just as his eyelids drift closed.

<3

[chokememaximoff]

Fainted into your arms

Wanda Maximoff x reader

Abstract: As Y/N navigates the demands of college and her family responsibilities, she forms a deep and unexpected connection with Wanda Maximoff

TW: none

Y/N Y/L/N's life had become a whirlwind of responsibilities. Her days were a relentless cycle of attending veterinary classes, completing clinical rotations, and serving coffee at the cafe until the early morning hours. Sleep had become a luxury she couldn't afford. But beyond her studies and work, she shouldered the weight of her family's needs. Her hometown visits meant taking care of her niece and her ailing mother, who required constant attention. Yet, Y/N somehow found the strength to study amidst the chaos.

As the finals loomed closer, spring swept in, bringing with it warmer days that only added to her exhaustion. One evening, on her way back home from the cafe, Y/N felt a wave of dizziness hit her. She stumbled and clutched onto a nearby tree for support, her body aching, her stomach churning. The combination of exhaustion, hunger, and dehydration had finally taken its toll.

Out of nowhere, a voice cut through the haze, "Are you okay, darling?" Startled, Y/N turned to see a striking older woman standing there. Dressed impeccably in a tailored suit, the woman exuded an air of elegance that left Y/N momentarily breathless. Concern etched on her face, the woman's presence was both comforting and bewildering.

Trying to steady herself, Y/N managed to stammer, "I'm... I'm okay, just... exhausted." But as the woman spoke, a sudden ringing overwhelmed her senses. She strained to hear, but the sound grew deafening, and darkness swallowed her whole.

When consciousness returned, Y/N was met with a throbbing headache. As she gingerly sat up, she realized a cold cloth had been placed on her forehead. Blinking, she looked around, disoriented by the opulent surroundings. Confusion gnawed at her, and an involuntary "What the fuck..." escaped her lips.

Footsteps approached, and the older woman entered the room, holding a tray of food that looked incredibly tempting. Warmth radiated from her smile as she noticed Y/N awake. Settling into a chair across from Y/N, she asked with genuine concern, "How are you feeling?"

Managing a weak chuckle, Y/N admitted, "Honestly, like shit." The woman's laughter danced in response. "You had me quite worried. Fainting into my arms was a bit unexpected. I brought you here so you could rest," she explained, her eyes conveying kindness.

A mixture of embarrassment and gratitude washed over Y/N. "Thank you. I... I appreciate it," she murmured, her cheeks flushing slightly. When the woman's hand landed on her knee, an electric current seemed to surge through Y/N, leaving her both surprised and intrigued. She attempted to shake off the sensation, not quite understanding it.

"You must have pushed yourself too hard," the woman, Wanda Maximoff, offered softly. Y/N nodded, feeling a strange connection forming between them. Despite the circumstances, a comfortable silence settled as they exchanged glances, understanding passing between them.

"I'm Y/N Y/L/N," Y/N finally introduced herself, extending her hand. Wanda's grip was warm and reassuring, and as their fingers touched, an undeniable spark coursed through Y/N. "Wanda Maximoff," the woman replied, her voice carrying a richness that resonated deep within Y/N.

...

Y/N savored each bite of the delicious food Wanda had prepared. The flavors danced on her taste buds, and she couldn't help but let out a satisfied moan. "This is the best food I've had all week!" she exclaimed, looking at Wanda with genuine appreciation.

Wanda's cheeks tinted with a faint blush. "Oh, it's nothing really. I just quickly put it together for you," she replied modestly.

Y/N playfully rolled her eyes. "Trust me, this is like Gordon Ramsay-level stuff. It's a huge shift after the cafeteria food... not that I eat that very much either. Most days, I forget to eat anything at all."

A shadow of concern flickered across Wanda's face. "That's not good, honey. You should take better care of yourself."

Y/N blushed at the endearing term of address. She looked down, a bit bashful. "I know, but there's so much on my plate. I don't want to burden you with my problems. Besides, you've already done so much by bringing me here."

Leaning in with a playful glint in her eyes, Wanda asked, "Now you've intrigued me. What caused you to faint dramatically into my arms?"

Y/N let out a sigh and began to open up, sharing the overwhelming challenges she faced daily. Wanda's concern was palpable as she listened intently to Y/N's story.

"Honey," Wanda said softly when Y/N finished, "you need to consider dropping that job. You're already managing so much."

Y/N arched an eyebrow skeptically. "And how am I supposed to pay for my dorm then?"

Wanda hesitated, a thoughtful look crossing her face. But then she changed the subject, asking if Y/N wanted a drink. Y/N, feeling flustered, declined, mumbling about overstaying her welcome.

Wanda shook her head, a warm smile on her lips. "You're not overstaying. You're welcome to stay, even overnight if you'd like."

Standing up, Y/N felt a mix of embarrassment and gratitude. "I appreciate that, but I wouldn't want to cause any trouble if someone else comes over."

Wanda chuckled softly. "I don't have a partner to worry about, whether husband or wife. Being 34 doesn't mean I have to be married, right, darling?"

Y/N's cheeks flushed as she stammered, "I didn't mean it like that." The proximity of Wanda's hand on her arm sent a shiver down her spine, igniting a spark of connection she couldn't ignore.

Leaning in even closer, Wanda's voice dropped. "And who said anything about marriage? I like to keep my options open."

Before Y/N could react, Wanda had retrieved her car keys. "Well, whether you're staying or not, I'll at least drive you to your dorm."

Y/N opened her mouth to protest, but the stern determination in Wanda's gaze silenced her. They walked down to Wanda's sleek Dodge Hellcat, chatting amiably during the drive. As they pulled up to Y/N's dorm, Wanda smiled warmly.

"Would you mind if I had your number?" Wanda inquired, a mischievous grin playing on her lips.

Y/N's blush deepened, but she nodded. Wanda handed her the phone, and Y/N typed in her number. Wanda saved the contact, and then she exited the car, opening the door for Y/N.

"Thank you," Y/N said, her voice a bit shaky as she stepped out.

Wanda's tone was affectionate as she said, "Take care of yourself, okay?" Then, in a surprising move, Wanda leaned in and pressed a gentle kiss to Y/N's cheek.

"Bye, Y/N," Wanda said with a grin, before driving away, leaving Y/N standing there, her heart racing and her mind reeling from the unexpected whirlwind of emotions and connections that had unfolded between them.

...

As Y/N stepped into the dorm room, her roommate Kate Bishop sat up groggily, rubbing her eyes. "Where have you been?" Kate asked, her voice half-awake yet curious.

Y/N winced sheepishly, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you up. I felt weak, so I stopped."

Kate raised an eyebrow, intrigued. "And then what happened? You woke me up by entering the room like you were being chased by a ghost."

A flush spread across Y/N's cheeks as she recounted the story. "Well, this incredibly hot 34-year-old woman came up to me and asked if I was okay. I, uh, totally embarrassed myself by fainting into her arms."

Kate's eyes widened in disbelief. "Wait, what? You fainted into the arms of a hot woman? Damn, Y/N, that's one way to make an impression."

Y/N rolled her eyes, flustered. "Yeah, yeah, laugh it up. She was really nice though. She even offered for me to stay over at her place, but I was too... flustered to accept. I gave her my number instead."

Kate chuckled, leaning back against her pillows. "Sounds like you've had quite the night. Maybe you'll actually get some rest now."

Y/N sighed, dropping dramatically onto her bed. Just as she was about to say something, her phone dinged with a message. She practically leaped off her bed to grab it, excitement bubbling within her.

Kate observed the scene with amusement. "Wow, you're like a kid on Christmas morning."

Y/N's face lit up as she read the message from the unknown number. "Hope you're getting rest, darling."

In her excitement, Y/N threw her phone at Kate, who caught it with a bemused expression. "Okay, what's got you this excited?" Kate asked.

Y/N bounced up and down, a wide grin on her face. "It's her! It's a message from Wanda! She actually texted me!"

Kate glanced at the message, then back at Y/N, and without hesitation, she playfully slapped Y/N's shoulder. "Damn, Y/N, you're gonna score an older woman. I'm so jealous!"

Y/N's blush deepened as she reclaimed her phone, practically beaming. "I can't believe this is happening."

Kate smirked. "Well, Miss Y/N Y/L/N, looks like you're in for an interesting ride. Now, lay down and sleep before I have to call Wanda to bend you over her knee for not resting."

Y/N laughed, finally settling onto her bed. As she closed her eyes, thoughts of Wanda and their unexpected connection filled her mind, and she couldn't help but feel a mix of excitement, nervousness, and anticipation for what lay ahead.

...

As the week progressed, Y/N Y/L/N found herself engaged in lively text conversations with Wanda Maximoff. Their exchanges became a bright spot in her demanding schedule, a source of comfort and excitement amidst her overwhelming commitments. Yet, despite Wanda's gentle reminders to take care of herself and rest, Y/N struggled to break free from her relentless routine.

Friday evening descended, and Y/N stumbled out of the cafe, weariness etched into her features. In her sleep-deprived state, she collided with someone just outside the door. Her murmured apology was met with a chuckle, and as Y/N looked up, her gaze locked onto Wanda's concerned expression.

"Honey, you told me you were resting more," Wanda remarked softly, concern etched in her voice. "You look like a zombie."

Y/N's cheeks flushed, her exhaustion becoming more evident. Attempting to inject some humor, she teased, "Am I a hot zombie, at least?"

A playful grin tugged at the corners of Wanda's lips. "The hottest zombie, I'd say. But this particular zombie is now coming with me to my apartment. It seems I can't trust you to rest properly on your own."

Y/N opened her mouth to object, but Wanda's hand was already wrapping around hers, leading her to Wanda's car. The sensation of Wanda's warm touch sent shivers down Y/N's spine, igniting a series of emotions she couldn't quite comprehend. The ride to Wanda's apartment was marked by a comfortable silence, a palpable connection existing between them.

Once they arrived, Y/N expressed her hesitations. "I really don't want to impose."

Wanda dismissed her concerns with a casual wave. "Darling, you're an intelligent woman. If someone invites you to their house, are you really intruding?"

Blushing deeply, Y/N murmured, "Okay, Maximoff. I'm guessing you want me here."

Wanda's grin was infectious. "Smart guess. Now, have you eaten, darling?"

Avoiding Wanda's gaze, Y/N admitted softly, "I haven't had the time."

Wanda's expression turned incredulous. "It's 11 PM. You should have at least eaten something."

Sighing, Y/N nodded. "Okay."

"Go on, make yourself comfortable on the couch," Wanda directed. "I'll whip up something delicious for you."

Following Wanda's guidance, Y/N settled onto the couch, pulling out her phone to send a quick text to Kate, updating her on the change of plans. Kate's response made her chuckle, and after stowing her phone away, she took a moment to appreciate the elegance of Wanda's apartment.

Heading into the kitchen, Y/N found Wanda with her hair in a bun, orchestrating a culinary masterpiece. The tantalizing aroma of the cooking filled the space, making Y/N's stomach rumble. However, her attention shifted from the food to Wanda, who was humming a catchy tune and swaying her hips to the rhythm. The sight was mesmerizing, and Y/N was caught off-guard when Wanda's voice interrupted her thoughts, "Enjoying the view, darling?"

Flustered, Y/N stammered, "I just... uh, wanted to check if you needed any assistance."

Wanda turned to face Y/N with a knowing smirk. "Darling, just sit there and look pretty. That's all the assistance I require from you."

Y/N felt her cheeks heat up as she obeyed, taking a seat in the kitchen. Wanda's smile was warm and inviting as she continued to prepare the meal. Y/N found herself captivated by Wanda's presence, a growing connection forming between them that seemed to transcend words.

As Wanda hummed a tune, Y/N recognized the song and pulled it up on her phone. Wanda's grin grew wider. "Ah, so you appreciate good music too?"

Embarrassed but sincere, Y/N replied, "Well, it's a classic..."

With the song playing softly in the background, their interaction continued to flow seamlessly, building a sense of familiarity and intimacy. Y/N couldn't help but feel drawn to Wanda's energy, and with every passing moment, she found herself sinking deeper into the unexpected connection that had bloomed between them.

After a satisfying meal, a pleasant drowsiness began to envelop Y/N Y/L/N. Wanda Maximoff noticed the telltale signs and smiled gently. "Well, it looks like it's time to head to bed, darling."

Y/N nodded, stifling a yawn. "Yeah, I guess it is."

Standing up, Wanda gestured for Y/N to follow her. Y/N complied, trailing behind Wanda as they entered a room that appeared to be Wanda's. Y/N's heart raced at the prospect of spending the night in the same room as Wanda.

Wanda pulled out some comfortable clothes from her closet and handed them to Y/N. "I wasn't going to let you sleep in jeans," she said with a chuckle. "There's a brand new toothbrush in the cabinet in the bathroom for you."

As Wanda retrieved a blanket and pillow, Y/N hesitated, glancing around the room. "Wait, where are you going? This is your bed."

Wanda smiled warmly, her eyes holding a reassuring glint. "I'm going to take the couch so that you can rest in a comfortable bed."

Y/N's expression turned into one of concern. "No, no, I can't let you sleep on the couch because of me. I'll take the couch or something."

Wanda shook her head, her tone firm but caring. "Darling, you need quality rest. The couch won't give you that."

Y/N sighed, feeling torn. "Well, you need quality rest too. Just stay in the bed. I don't mind sleeping with you."

Wanda's eyebrows raised, a blush tinting her cheeks. Y/N's words seemed to hang in the air, charged with unintended implications. Y/N quickly stumbled over her words, flustered. "I mean, I didn't mean it like that. I just don't want you to be tired tomorrow. I mean, look, I don't want you to think that I wouldn't... Oh god, just sleep in the bed and don't comment on it, please."

Wanda chuckled, her fingers lightly pinching Y/N's cheek. "I make you quite nervous, don't I? But that's okay. You're adorable when you're nervous."

Y/N blushed even deeper, feeling a mixture of embarrassment and fondness for Wanda's teasing. She quickly excused herself, retreating to the bathroom. Changing into the shorts and t-shirt Wanda had given her, Y/N couldn't help but smile when she realized the clothes carried Wanda's scent.

After brushing her teeth and washing her face, Y/N took a deep breath and looked at her reflection in the mirror. This was it—a chance to sleep in the same bed as the woman she had developed a crush on, a bit too intensely.

As Y/N emerged from the bathroom after changing, her eyes widened at the sight of Wanda Maximoff, now clad in shorts and a tank top. The subtle curve of Wanda's figure caught her attention, and she quickly averted her gaze, feeling her cheeks heat up.

Wanda's chuckle rippled through the air. "You're easy to impress, darling."

Y/N shushed her, her embarrassment evident. Walking over to the bed, she slipped under the covers, her heart racing. Just a moment later, Wanda returned from the bathroom, her presence making Y/N's heart skip a beat. Climbing into the bed as well, Wanda settled beside her.

Y/N fumbled for her phone, trying to steady her nerves. She turned on an alarm, prompting Wanda to raise an eyebrow. "Why set an alarm? You don't have any classes tomorrow."

Y/N hesitated for a moment before answering, "I have to catch the bus to my hometown for the weekend. You know, my mom and niece—I have to help out."

Wanda gently took Y/N's phone from her hands and turned off the alarm. Handing it back, she declared, "We're sleeping in tomorrow. I'm driving you to your parents' place."

Y/N shook her head, protest forming on her lips. "No, no, I can't have you do that."

Rolling her eyes playfully, Wanda insisted, "Honey, consider it done."

Y/N let out a resigned sigh, still feeling overwhelmed by Wanda's kindness. "I don't understand why you're being so nice to me."

There was a brief pause, a sense of vulnerability hanging in the air. Wanda's usual confidence seemed to waver for the first time that night. But then, she brushed off the moment, a smile gracing her lips. "Rest now, darling. We'll talk tomorrow, okay?"

Y/N nodded, her heart fluttering as Wanda leaned in and placed a gentle kiss on her cheek. "Good night, Y/N."

Flustered, Y/N managed to reply, "Good night, Wanda," as she watched Wanda's retreating figure. Alone in the dimly lit room, Y/N couldn't help but replay the events of the evening, the weight of Wanda's presence, and the gentle kiss on her cheek, making it difficult for her to fall asleep.

...

As the morning sun began to filter through the curtains, Y/N's phone rang, stirring her from her slumber. With a groan, she moved to reach for it, only to realize that she was met with resistance. Blinking in confusion, she realized that her arms were wrapped around someone, and she was on top of them. Her eyes widened as she took in the sight of Wanda Maximoff, peacefully sleeping beneath her, arms wrapped securely around Y/N.

For a moment, Y/N couldn't help but admire the tranquility of Wanda's sleeping form. The soft rise and fall of her chest, the delicate curve of her lips, and the way her hair cascaded across the pillow—it was a sight to behold.

As Y/N's phone continued to ring, she decided to answer it before it woke Wanda. Her mother's voice greeted her from the other side, a mix of concern and scolding evident. "Y/N, why weren't you answering? Did you get on the bus safely?"

Y/N winced, feeling slightly guilty. "I'm sorry, Mom. I'm fine, really. I just...slept in."

Wanda stirred slightly at the sound of Y/N's voice, letting out a soft groan. Y/N's mother continued, oblivious to Wanda's presence. "Did you wake Kate up?"

Y/N quickly shook her head, forgetting that her mom couldn't see her. "No, it's not Kate. Uh, a friend will be driving me to your house, so I just slept in a bit."

Y/N's mother sounded puzzled. "Well, if it's not Kate, then who is it?"

Blushing, Y/N stammered, "Uh, it's someone... Anyway, see ya, love you, bye, Mom."

As she hung up the phone, she became aware of Wanda's amused gaze upon her. Wanda's voice, tinged with a playful tone, broke the silence. "A friend, huh?"

Y/N playfully slapped Wanda's shoulder. "My mom won't let me live this down now."

Wanda laughed, rubbing Y/N's back gently. "Well, at least you're awake now. By the way, who's Kate?"

Raising her eyebrows, Y/N teased, "Jealous?"

Wanda rolled her eyes. "Just tell me."

Y/N chuckled, explaining, "Kate is my roommate."

Satisfied with the response, Wanda gestured towards the bathroom. "Alright, time to get up. I'm making breakfast."

Y/N nodded, finally mustering the will to extricate herself from Wanda's embrace. The warmth of Wanda's presence lingered, leaving Y/N with a mixture of emotions that she wasn't quite sure how to process. As she headed to the bathroom, she couldn't help but feel grateful for the unexpected turn of events that had brought her into Wanda's orbit.

As they sat down to enjoy breakfast, the morning sunlight painted the room with a warm glow. Y/N took a deep breath, mustering the courage to ask the question that had been lingering in her mind. "Wanda, can you tell me why you've been so nice to me?"

Wanda's expression shifted, a mixture of nervousness and vulnerability crossing her features. She cleared her throat, her gaze fixed on her plate. "Look, I don't want you to find this weird, and I really don't want it to ruin anything between us, even if you don't feel the same way."

Y/N's heart skipped a beat, her curiosity piqued. "Wanda, you can tell me. I promise I won't judge."

Wanda took a deep breath, her voice wavering slightly. "From the moment I laid my eyes on you, even though you were fainting, I couldn't help but feel drawn to you and your beauty. The more we talked, the more I got to know you, the more I realized I liked you."

Y/N's eyes widened, the realization hitting her like a wave. She listened intently as Wanda continued, her voice soft but filled with sincerity. "I'm nice to you because, honestly, I like you in way more than just a friend way. I would like to take care of you because you obviously need someone to. I know this might be too forward, and I don't want you to feel uncomfortable, but I have a crush on you, you could say."

Y/N was at a loss for words, her mind racing to process what she had just heard. She cleared her throat, her voice shaky as she repeated, "Take care of me?"

Wanda nodded, a determined look in her eyes. "Yes. I would offer you to stay at my place so you don't have to go to work, and you can rest more and just focus on your studies and your family. I really don't want anything in return. I just... I have more than enough money to take you under my wing and help you out."

Y/N's mind was a whirlwind of emotions as she tried to absorb everything. She chuckled nervously, looking up at Wanda. "Wait, you really think I don't like you back?"

Wanda's brows furrowed in confusion. "What do you mean?"

Y/N's chuckle turned into a genuine smile. "Wanda, I get flustered when you so much as breathe my way. I like you a bit too much if I'm honest."

Wanda's face broke into a wide grin, her eyes lighting up. "You do?"

Y/N nodded, her cheeks flushed but her gaze unwavering. "But I didn't want to push anything because I didn't know if you wanted anything with me. I mean, I'm younger..."

Wanda's grin remained, and she leaned in closer. "You know what they say, darling. Age is just a number."

As their eyes locked, the weight of their unspoken feelings hung in the air. The breakfast table was forgotten, the world around them fading as they shared a moment filled with possibility and newfound understanding.

...

Wanda followed through on her promise. She drove Y/N to her family's house, the journey filled with casual conversation and stolen glances that held a world of unspoken emotions. As they reached their destination, Wanda pulled the car to a stop. Turning to Y/N, she leaned in and placed a gentle kiss on her cheek. "Have a good time, Y/N. Take care."

Y/N blushed, her heart fluttering at the touch of Wanda's lips against her skin. "Thank you, Wanda," she replied, her voice soft.

Wanda offered a warm smile before retracting and exiting the car. She waved at Y/N and watched as Y/N walked towards her family's home. Once Y/N was safely inside, Wanda turned back to her car and drove away, her thoughts consumed by the woman she had come to care for.

Inside her family's home, Y/N's grin was practically infectious as she greeted her niece with open arms. The little girl's small arms wrapped around Y/N's knees, and Y/N scooped her up, showering her with kisses and affection. After greeting her niece, she moved on to her mother, kissing her cheek and exchanging warm greetings. Her brother and his wife received the same treatment, and soon the entire family was caught up in laughter and conversation.

As they settled in, Y/N's mother couldn't help but notice the newfound glow in her daughter's demeanor. With a curious smile, she leaned in and whispered, "Who was that woman you were with this morning? And who was in that expensive car that drove you here?"

Y/N blushed, glancing down at her plate momentarily before looking up. "Well, Mom, I met a woman named Wanda. She's pretty amazing. She's a bit older, but she's really good to me and helps me out a lot."

Her brother couldn't resist chiming in with a teasing grin. "And what does she ask for in return?"

Y/N shook her head, a soft smile on her lips. "Nothing, actually. She's taking things as I want to."

Her brother exchanged a knowing glance with his wife before both of them requested to see a picture of this "amazing" woman. Y/N obliged, showing them a photo of Wanda on her phone. Their jaws dropped slightly, and her brother whistled, exclaiming, "Damn, sis."

Y/N laughed, feeling a mixture of embarrassment and pride. The weekend was spent helping out around the house, catching up with family, and exchanging stories of their lives.

Finally, Sunday night arrived, and Y/N's phone buzzed with a message from Wanda, indicating her arrival. Y/N said her goodbyes to her family, embracing each of them in turn. With a smile on her lips and thoughts of Wanda swirling in her mind, Y/N left her family's house and headed toward the waiting car.

As Y/N stepped into the car, the air was charged with a mix of excitement and nervousness. She couldn't hold back the surge of emotions that had built up over the weekend. Before she could overthink it, she reached out and gently cupped Wanda's cheeks, drawing her in for a tender kiss on the lips.

Wanda's surprise was evident, but she quickly responded to the kiss, her lips meeting Y/N's with a mixture of passion and softness. The moment was fleeting yet filled with an undeniable connection that spoke volumes beyond words.

As they pulled away, Wanda's eyes held a mixture of surprise and curiosity. "What was that for?"

Y/N's cheeks were tinted pink, but her smile was genuine. "Just missed you."

Wanda chuckled, her own blush evident. "If that's how you're always gonna greet me, I will be more than happy to drive you to your family every weekend."

Y/N laughed, her heart fluttering at Wanda's response. "Well, I guess you'll just have to find out."

The car started moving, carrying them down the road, away from Y/N's family home and toward the uncertain yet exciting path that lay ahead. With each passing moment, their bond grew stronger, and the connection they shared became more profound. As they journeyed together, they were both aware that their lives had taken an unexpected turn, but it was a turn that they were more than willing to explore.

...

On a typical afternoon, Y/N found herself in Wanda's apartment, engrossed in her studies after a long day of classes. Wanda was still at work, and Y/N appreciated the quiet atmosphere that allowed her to focus. However, her concentration was interrupted by a knock on the door.

Assuming it was Wanda returning earlier than expected, Y/N got up and walked over to the door. But when she opened it, she was met with the sight of an unfamiliar woman with striking ginger hair. Their eyes met, both puzzled by the unexpected encounter.

The woman spoke first, her voice carrying a hint of uncertainty. "Um, do I have the wrong apartment?"

Y/N leaned against the door frame, her brow furrowing. "Well, who are you looking for?"

The woman hesitated for a moment before responding, "I'm looking for Wanda Maximoff."

Y/N's expression cleared as she realized the situation. "No, you have the right apartment. Wanda isn't home yet."

The woman offered a faint smile. "May I come in then?"

Y/N stepped aside, welcoming her guest. Once inside, the woman introduced herself as Natasha Romanoff, a close friend of Wanda's. Y/N's curiosity piqued, and she looked at Natasha with interest.

Natasha's gaze was quizzical as she observed Y/N. "And who might you be?"

Y/N extended her hand with a friendly smile. "I'm Y/N, Wanda's girlfriend."

Natasha's eyebrows raised, a playful smirk forming on her lips. "Oh, Wanda keeps you a secret, huh?"

Y/N chuckled, feeling a mixture of flattery and awkwardness. "It's all very sudden."

Natasha leaned against a nearby surface, her posture relaxed. She shot Y/N a teasing glance. "Well, Y/N, it's nice to finally meet the elusive girlfriend."

Y/N blushed, not entirely sure how to respond to Natasha's playful demeanor. "Nice to meet you too, Natasha."

The teasing took an unexpected turn as Natasha leaned in slightly, a flirtatious glint in her eye. "You know, Y/N, if Wanda's keeping secrets, maybe you deserve a little fun too."

Y/N chuckled nervously, her cheeks pink. "Natasha, I don't think that's a smart idea. I'm with Wanda."

Before Natasha could continue the flirtatious banter, the door swung open, and Wanda walked in, her voice cutting through the moment. "Give her a break, Nat."

Wanda's presence instantly changed the atmosphere, and Natasha straightened up, her demeanor shifting to a more composed one. Y/N let out a relieved breath as Wanda entered the room, her eyes meeting Y/N's with warmth and familiarity.

"Well, Wands, I just had to check if she was loyal to you," Natasha quipped, her tone light. "I gotta make sure my friend is happy, you know."

Y/N's cheeks heated up, and she playfully hid her face against Wanda's neck, letting out a nervous laugh. Wanda chuckled and wrapped an arm around Y/N's waist, looking at Natasha with an amused expression. "You have a funny way of looking out for me, Nat."

Natasha grinned mischievously, raising an eyebrow. "Hey, I take my job as a friend seriously."

The tension eased as they all burst into laughter, the awkwardness of the situation dissipating into shared amusement. Wanda's gaze landed on Y/N again, a playful glint in her eyes. "So, Y/N, did you pass the loyalty test?"

Y/N peeked out from her hiding spot, still blushing but more at ease. "I think so?"

Natasha gave a mock-exasperated sigh. "Yes, she did. I mean, who could resist me?"

Wanda chuckled, giving Y/N's waist a gentle squeeze. "Well, I managed to."

The camaraderie between the three of them was palpable as they exchanged playful banter. Natasha's curiosity shifted toward a more serious topic as she asked, "So, how come Y/N is already living here?"

Wanda looked at Y/N with a fond smile before turning back to Natasha. "Y/N is working really hard, juggling studies, a part-time job, and taking care of her family. I wanted to help her out, make things a bit easier."

Natasha's smile softened, her eyes conveying a mix of respect and admiration. "You've always had a heart of gold, Wands."

Y/N chimed in, her voice filled with gratitude. "It's true. Wanda's been amazing, Natasha. She's been there for me when I needed someone the most."

Natasha nodded appreciatively. "Well, you're lucky to have her. I've been trying to score this one for a while, but I'm guessing now she was just waiting for a young, hot one."

Y/N burst into laughter, the tension fully lifted now. "Maybe she was."

The atmosphere was easy and light, a testament to the bond between the three of them. As the conversation continued, Y/N realized that Wanda's friendships were as unique and genuine as the woman herself, and she couldn't help but feel grateful for having been welcomed into this circle of care and camaraderie.

...

The weeks that followed were a whirlwind of studying, hard work, and determination. Y/N was relentless in her pursuit of success, and her dedication paid off as she passed all her finals with amazing grades. With her accomplishments in hand, she decided to celebrate with her roommate Kate and Kate's girlfriend Yelena. Y/N extended an invitation to Wanda and Natasha as well, eager to share her joy with those who had become so important to her.

As they arrived at the club for their celebratory night out, Y/N's excitement was palpable. The atmosphere was charged with music and energy, setting the stage for a memorable evening. Natasha's presence, however, sparked a surprised reaction.

Natasha raised an eyebrow, looking at Yelena with a mixture of amusement and confusion. "What are you doing here?"

The others exchanged curious glances, wondering about the unexpected connection. Yelena rolled her eyes playfully. "She's my sister."

Laughter erupted, the coincidental meeting of sisters in such a vast city adding a layer of camaraderie to the group. As they settled into the night, the drinks flowed, and inhibitions slowly faded away. Y/N found herself dancing energetically, her body moving to the rhythm of the music.

In the midst of the pulsating lights and music, Y/N felt Wanda's presence beside her. Their bodies moved in sync, and Y/N couldn't resist leaning in closer, feeling the magnetic pull that had drawn them together. As the night progressed, the alcohol added a layer of courage, and Y/N found herself becoming bolder.

Kate, with her playful nature, teased Y/N about Wanda, causing a blush to spread across Y/N's cheeks. Just as Y/N was about to stammer a response, Wanda's hand cupped her cheek, and their lips met in a soft yet passionate kiss.

Y/N's heart raced, the world around them fading as Wanda's touch enveloped her. As they broke apart, Wanda's eyes held an affectionate gaze, and her words were whispered with tenderness. "You're adorable."

The music and laughter continued to fill the air, the night a tapestry of joy and connection. Y/N had found herself surrounded by people who cared for her deeply, who had become a part of her journey and her heart. As they danced and laughed together, Y/N realized that life had taken her on an unexpected yet beautiful path, one filled with love, friendship, and unforgettable moments.

...

In the days that followed Y/N's graduation, a sense of accomplishment and relief washed over her. She had worked tirelessly to excel in her studies, and now that she had successfully passed all her finals with remarkable grades, a new chapter of life awaited. As she basked in the glow of her achievement, she couldn't help but appreciate the support and love she had received from her friends and loved ones.

Among those who had been a constant presence was Wanda Maximoff. Ever since their chance encounter and the subsequent connection they had formed, Wanda had become an integral part of Y/N's life. They had shared moments of vulnerability, laughter, and genuine companionship. Y/N was grateful for Wanda's unwavering encouragement and support throughout her academic journey.

Yet, as graduation day approached, Y/N noticed a curious change in Wanda's behavior. She seemed to take a keen interest in cars, a topic that Y/N hadn't seen Wanda express much enthusiasm about before. Wanda would often ask Y/N about her preferences, the type of cars she liked, and even her dream car.

One evening, as they were sitting in a cozy corner of their favorite café, Y/N couldn't help but voice her curiosity. "Wanda, you seem really interested in cars lately. Is there a reason for that?"

Wanda looked at Y/N, a playful glint in her eyes. "You can tell a lot about a person by which car is their dream car."

Y/N chuckled, intrigued by the enigmatic response but not thinking too deeply about it. They shifted the conversation to other topics, enjoying the comfort of each other's company. Graduation day came and went, filled with the joy of accomplishment and the anticipation of new beginnings.

On a warm evening, after a celebratory dinner with her family, Y/N returned home with a contented smile. The apartment was dimly lit, and the air was charged with an air of mystery. Wanda's eyes twinkled as she approached Y/N, a blindfold in her hand.

"Close your eyes," Wanda instructed, her voice gentle.

Y/N complied, feeling a mixture of excitement and curiosity. The blindfold was carefully placed over her eyes, and Wanda's fingers brushed against her skin as she tied it securely. Y/N's heart raced as she wondered what surprise awaited her.

Wanda took Y/N's hand and led her carefully, their steps measured and deliberate. Y/N's mind raced with possibilities, trying to guess where they were headed. The sound of footsteps echoed through the hallways, and Y/N felt a rush of anticipation.

Finally, Wanda's voice broke through the silence. "Okay, open your eyes."

Y/N removed the blindfold, and her eyes widened in astonishment. Before her stood a sleek and elegant Tesla, bathed in the soft glow of the evening lights. Y/N's breath caught in her throat, her heart skipping a beat. She turned to Wanda, her expression a mix of surprise and confusion.

"Wanda, what is this?"

Wanda's smile was warm and genuine as she took out a set of keys and placed them in Y/N's hand. "This is a graduation gift from me."

Tears welled up in Y/N's eyes, her emotions overwhelming her. "Wanda, I can't accept this. It's too much."

Wanda's expression was gentle yet resolute. "You deserve it, Y/N. To me, it's nothing, and seeing you happy makes me happy."

Y/N tried to find the right words, to express her gratitude and disbelief, but they eluded her. Instead, she reached out and pulled Wanda into a tight embrace, her heart overflowing with emotions. They stood there for a moment, wrapped in each other's arms, celebrating an achievement that felt even more special because it was shared.

As they pulled apart, Y/N's gaze fell on a neatly wrapped box placed on the driver's seat. She looked at Wanda, her curiosity piqued. Wanda's playful expression and a subtle raise of her eyebrows indicated that there was more to come.

With trembling fingers, Y/N carefully unwrapped the box, revealing a stethoscope of exquisite craftsmanship. The instrument was beautifully designed, with Y/N's name elegantly engraved on it. Y/N's eyes widened in astonishment, her hand touching the stethoscope as if it were a precious artifact.

She looked at Wanda, her voice filled with awe. "This is amazing, thank you so much."

Wanda's fingers brushed against Y/N's cheek, her gaze soft and affectionate. "You're welcome, darling. You've worked so hard, and I wanted to mark this moment for you."

Y/N's heart swelled with gratitude, her emotions swirling within her. She cupped Wanda's cheeks, a mixture of tenderness and adoration in her eyes. Without another word, she leaned in and pressed her lips against Wanda's, a kiss filled with a depth of emotion words could never convey.

As the kiss deepened, the world around them faded away, leaving only the two of them and the shared bond that had grown between them. It was a kiss that spoke of gratitude, love, and the promise of a future filled with shared moments and cherished memories.

When they finally broke apart, Y/N's gaze fell upon the Tesla once more. With newfound determination, she unlocked the car and opened the passenger door for Wanda. Wanda smiled appreciatively, leaning in to place a soft kiss on Y/N's cheek.

"Thank you," Y/N whispered, her voice filled with sincerity.

Wanda winked playfully. "Now, are you going to drive me around, or what?"

Y/N grinned, the excitement bubbling within her. She entered the driver's seat, the car's interior a blend of sleek design and cutting-edge technology. Wanda settled into the passenger seat, her smile warm and her eyes filled with affection.

As they drove off into the night, the city's lights illuminating their path, Y/N couldn't help but gush about the car's features. Wanda listened with a fond smile, her heart full as she watched Y/N's animated expressions and heard the excitement in her voice.

The wind tousled their hair, carrying with it a sense of freedom and possibility. Y/N glanced at Wanda, her heart swelling with gratitude for the woman who had not only gifted her a remarkable car but had also filled her life with love, support, and moments that would forever be etched in her heart.

...

Years had flowed by since that pivotal graduation day, where Y/N's life had taken an unforeseen turn. Her world had been forever altered by the chance encounter with Wanda Maximoff, and their love had grown in strength and depth.

In the intervening years, Y/N's veterinary career had soared to greater heights. Her clinic had become a beacon of excellence in animal care, drawing clients from near and far. The walls of her office were adorned with framed degrees and accolades, a testament to her dedication and skill.

But it wasn't just professional success that had filled Y/N's life. It was the unwavering support and boundless love of Wanda that had truly enriched her existence. Wanda had been her anchor, her confidante, and her biggest cheerleader. Their love had evolved into an unbreakable bond, a love story that had touched the hearts of all who knew them.

Wanda's own journey had continued to impress. Her law firm had flourished under her expert guidance, and she had become a formidable presence in the legal world. Yet, her true fulfillment came from the positive impact she had on her community. Wanda was known for her philanthropic endeavors, her commitment to justice, and her kindness to those in need.

Their shared life was a vibrant tapestry woven with love and laughter. Their home, once just a place to reside, had transformed into a sanctuary of warmth and comfort. It was a place where the aroma of Wanda's delicious cooking filled the air, where playful banter echoed through the halls, and where their love story was etched into every corner.

One thing that had remained unchanged was Wanda's knack for surprising Y/N. Special occasions were marked with grand gestures, such as romantic getaways to exotic destinations or extravagant celebrations with friends and family. But it was the everyday surprises that often meant the most—a heartfelt note left on a pillow or a spontaneous dance in the living room to their favorite song.

Their love story was a living testament to the power of connection, resilience, and unwavering support. Through trials and triumphs, they had weathered life's challenges hand in hand, growing closer with each obstacle they overcame. Their love had deepened, matured, and become a source of strength for them both.

As they continued to walk the winding path of life, Y/N and Wanda knew that whatever the future held, they would face it together. Their love was a testament to the enduring power of two souls united by destiny, a love story that would continue to inspire and enchant for years to come.

[melodic-haze]

heyy, may i request some natasha content? she's so underrated i swear 😩😩

☆ — SONG TITLE: Acts of service

☆ — PAIRINGS: Natasha x Reader

☆ — TYPE: Fluff, SFW

☆ — CONTENT WARNINGS: None

☆ — NOTES: No NSFW for this one cuz I've been doing a lotta that 🫶 hope you don't mind!!! Also idk what colour to give her :(

☆ — WORD COUNT: 1,609 words

Visiting Natasha became something of a routine for you. Despite everything that you did in the day, you never failed to visit the doctor—it was usually during the afternoon, around the time you had lunch, because then you asked her to have a bite with her every time, to which she always agreed to.

Half of the reason why was because you had wanted to spend time with Wildfire's true leader as.. well, not Wildfire's leader. You wanted to get to know Natasha, nobody else, at first.. but then it went from getting to know her to having each other's presence become something of a constant in both your lives, and then to something even more.

The other half of the reason, though, was because you were concerned.

She was the Underworld's best doctor, so naturally everyone relied on her. While she did have a massively good reputation, unfortunately that came at the cost of a decrease in the time for her to relax.

Such a thing was evident to see when it was moments like these—you had just stepped into her clinic and already you are witnessing the blue-gray-haired woman rush back and forth, patient to patient. After all, you had waited for.. what was essentially an hour before you decided to just stop waiting and to go to her yourself to see what was happening.

You had to take your time in actually approaching her, worried that you might somehow disturb her flow, and only actually decide to try to gain her attention when she seems to have slowed down.

Gently placing a hand on her shoulder, you softly called out to her, "Natasha?"

You hear her sigh the slightest bit, tired and weary, but when she turns her head and sees you she pushes herself upright on her desk as if startled. She quickly downplays her surprise with a laugh, however, "Oh! Dear, you gave me a quite a shock. What are you here for? Are you sick?"

"No, no," you shook your head, "I'm not on death's door or anything like that. Seems like you've got your hands full of the people that are, though."

She let out a small yet exhausted laugh, the lines on her eyes particularly evident today, "I suppose I am, aren't I? ..Though not to be hasty, and I do love to see you and your face, but if you aren't here to get treated, then is there another reason why you're here?"

The clinic was so particularly hectic today that she forgot.

"..Nat."

"Yes?"

"We were supposed to meet up a bit more than an hour ago."

You see her take her phone out of her pocket to check the time and--

"Oh."

Her eyes widen at the realisation before darting back to you with furrowed brows, "I hadn't realised... Were you waiting this whole time?"

You shrugged with a sheepish grin, "I didn't really want to leave in case you were just late. I see that you're really busy, though."

You see her sigh out and look at you apologetically, "Dear, you should've called me. I didn't mean to lose track--"

"Hey, no, I'm not mad or anything, don't worry about it." You reach for her hands to hold them tenderly as you got a little closer to her, "I can see that you're absolutely swamped with work, I get it. I wouldn't have signed myself up for dating you if I didn't accept it."

"Be that as it may, this is practically routine for the both of us."

"Yeah, but this is still your job." You gave her a light shrug and a reassuring smile, "Don't worry about it, yeah? We can just postphone it for when you go off the clock."

She huffs out gently with a small shake of her head, "A doctor never fully gets off the clock."

"Even when the Stellaron's gone?"

"Mhm. Not only that, but some of the others have caught an illness so we're short-staffed and I've been scrambling left and right. I'm afraid I had no time to think about anything else... Or, well," she draws a hand back from your grasp to cup your cheek with such a soft, affectionate look, "until you came along. Now I feel like I can't seem to think of--"

"Natasha?" The both of you turn to look at the nurse calling out to your lover, her touch on you breaking away at the disturbance, "Sorry to disturb you but, um, we need you here."

Natasha fully lets go of you now, easily getting herself back into work mode, "He's woken up?" And when the nurse nods, she answers swiftly, "Alright. I'll be there in a second."

Then she turns back to you, work mode off for a brief moment. While her affectionate look is still there, you could easily see how much today's exhaustion's getting to her, "I'm sorry that I'll have to leave you like this. I don't think I really have time to spare so.. I'll meet you when I'm done?"

"Mm." You briefly go to squeeze her hand and press a quick peck on her cheek, "Good luck with work, yeah? I'll be waiting."

She nods, and then she turns to make a beeline over to the waiting patient, leaving you alone in the middle of the clinic. You supposed that you should probably go so you make your way over to the door...

But when you put a hand on the doorknob, suddenly you're hit with a revelation.

You rush back over to her (the desk she owns, specifically) and wait for until she's finished with her current charge. It takes a while, but eventually she turns to walk over to said desk, to which she sees you and makes a confused yet amused expression, "I don't believe I'm off the clock yet, darling. Anything you need?"

"No, actually." You shook your head at her, "On the contrary, I think I have a little solution to your problem."

She crossed her arms as she hummed in curiosity, "Hmm? And whatever may that be?"

"I can help. Like, as some sort of assistant."

"..Go on."

"I know I'm not necessarily trained to be a doctor like you, or a nurse, or anyone in the professional health field, but I can do the other stuff like book-keeping and supply pick-ups. And maybe fetching stuff for you," you shrugged, "but I can't promise that I'll know what they look like."

You had expected her to accept the help—you have to use whatever resource you have in the Underworld, even when the passage between here and the overworld has been opened up. However, instead you see her shaking her head with slightly furrowed brows, "I'm afraid I can't let you do that."

"Why not?"

"I can't ask that of you. I wouldn't want you to sacrifice your day to help me with my job..." She looks to the side, pensive, "And I'm afraid I can't pay you either; I don't want to monopolise you just because we share a close bond.

You waved off her concerns, "Don't worry about that. One, I already get paid by spending time with you. And two, you're not monopolising anything—I'm offering to help. So let me?"

She looks at you, looks back towards the patients behind her, and then looks back at you again, her face showing clear contemplation. She's silent for a while and the lack of an answer plays with your nerves, but she eventually gives you a small, teasing smile, "It will probably take up the entire rest of your day. Are you sure you can hold out for that long here?"

"Ah, but you underestimate me—I can do anything when you're with me."

She laughs, and it's the most beautiful sight you've ever witnessed, "We'll have to see, won't we?"

You both get straight into work after that; Natasha tends to the patients with the other nurses as you dutifully do exactly as you said, taking care of most of the documentations and fetching the needed supplies for her and everyone else (without touching the chemicals in case you mess something up, of course). The amount of work was, quite frankly, insane for such a small clinic but you supposed that all places had their busiest days, medical locations included.

It was tough, and it sure as hell was exhausting, but eventually you pulled through the day and finally you were off the clock. You left a little earlier per your girlfriend's request, waiting outside for her to come out instead. And once she walks out the door, you two walk back home in companiable silence.

It's only when you reach your house when she speaks up, guilt tinging her tone, "I'm sorry we didn't end up having lunch as per usual, dear."

"I told you so many times, Nat, I seriously don't mind. I wanted to help!"

"Not that I'm ungrateful, and I know you offered, but are you sure you were okay to help? Treating people and helping them recover is something I love to do, but you could have done something else."

"I could have," you paused in your steps, opting Natasha go do the same. "But I wanna spend more time with you. Plus, hospital intern dates aren't exactly the worst dates ever."

She laughs again, and you can't get enough of it, "I suppose it isn't. Now come," she nudges her head towards your house's direction, "I'll make up for the whole of today, starting with a delightful meal. Care to join me, Y/N?"

Yes. Yes, you'd very much like to.

[snzhrchy]

I have a request!! Ajax x reader who is really outgoing and people see her as super annoying so they’re mean to her, one day Ajax catches her crying bc she’s fed up with it, and he confesses/they kiss.

— ☆ MORE THAN THAT !

ajax petropolus x fem!reader

synopsis; just how you and your best friend's relationship developed into something more.

notes; think i projected here a lot haha.

taglist; lmk if u wanna be on it

You were just trying to be nice. You didn’t know how you ended up like this. One minute, you’re trying to have a conversation with Bianca and the next? You’re crying under the Edgar Allan Poe statue.

It’s always been like this, you thought. People would always mistake your kindness for something else — most would either take advantage of it or make fun of it. Today was your last straw.

You had had enough of the vampire boys and the siren girls constantly torturing your mind; it was getting exhausting. And for once, you finally broke down today.

You were never the one to run away from a fight but today was different. You actually ran away from them. From their constant remarks. Today, you finally let the tears fall and you finally freed your emotions — the emotions you’d been trying to bottle up for so long.

Ironic, wasn’t it? Being treated as an outcast in a school that was made for outcasts.

It hurt. The constant insults and slandering of you behind your back; you never truly knew how anyone ever felt about you. When was the last time you ever had someone to call your friend? You couldn’t even remember.

Well, one person did come into mind: Ajax Petropolus.

From your first day at Nevermore, he’d been the only person who’d shown you any type of kindness. Hell, he was the only person who didn’t treat you like the rest.

With Ajax, you felt at peace. You felt like you could talk to him about anything and everything without the fear of ever being ridiculed. You trusted him very much.

The sound of boots clicking across the dirty marble floor caused you to jump and quickly wipe off all the tears that streamed down your face. You tried to prevent the tears from falling but were unsuccessful. You didn’t want anyone to see you like this — crying.

The sounds started to get louder, they were nearing towards you. In a panic, you aggressively cleaned your face and attempted to make yourself look presentable.

‘Knew I’d find you here!’ The person spoke, their voice was raspy yet comforting — it was Ajax. The only person you wanted to see right now.

You weakly smiled at him and gave him a small wave as if to distract from the fact that you have been crying. Yet your attempts were futile once Ajax noticed. He cursed as he walked over to you and wrapped an arm around your shoulder, pulling you closer to him.

‘Were you crying?’ He asked, turning to look at your face which has really noticeable tears stains; ‘wait — that’s a stupid question. I mean, how are you feeling?’

You chuckled at the first part of his statement — he really knew how to cheer you up or atleast, make you forget about your problems.

‘I’m better now,’ you slowly told him as he traced his fingers across your arm. ‘That’s great — who made you cry? Maybe I can stone them,’ he suggested.

‘Oh y’know — the same old people, nothing to worry about.’

‘They fought with you? Again?’

‘Yes but it’s no big deal, it happens all the time.’

Ajax turned to look at you, he had a stern expression on his face. ‘No big deal? C’mon, Y/N, they’ve been doing this since you arrived here and—‘ ‘and that’s why I’m used to it,’ you stated, ‘trust me, it’s nothing.’ He sighed, ‘well, if you say so.’

You both sat in silence for a while, just enjoying each other’s presence. Your tears had stopped falling a long time ago — the entire situation had been forgotten; you just wanted to be with him right now.

‘Hey, listen…’ Ajax began, grabbing your attention, ‘don’t listen to them, they’re wrong about everything they’ve ever said to you.’

You removed yourself from his embrace and sat up, looking at him bewildered. ‘What do you mean?’ you questioned.

‘Well, they make fun of your looks and mock your personality but they're all wrong,' he continued, 'you're beautiful and you're not annoying at all — far from it. You're the best thing to have happened to me.'

The ends of your lips slowly curved into a small smile, 'thanks,' you managed to respond. He turned his head to face you, 'I really mean it,' he stated as one of his hand gently touched your face and wiped off a tear that you didn't know had escaped your eyes.

You both stared into each other's eyes for a while until Ajax finally closed the gap between you two. You slowly shut your eyes tight as you kissed him back.

[minoment]

Hello there, may I request some cod characters being harassed in a bar or whatever and having a tall, intimidating reader step in to defend them?

(Preferably with Krueger, König or Price?)

Imma give you all three because I can't choose.. ALSO THANK YOU FOR ASKING FOR KRUEGER

Warnings/Tags: purely sfw, can be platonic or romantic, gn reader, reader is MASSIVE (around 7ft), implied harrasment, implied violence

this is sloppy and poorly edited because i'm exhausted 😭

KREUGER

You'd probably only have to step in because of Krueger's violent tendencies. If it wasn't for you, you guys would probably be in a VERY different situation.

Krueger leant against the bar, sipping his drink while this clearly drunk man yammered on in his ear. He decided to ignore him, since he was exhausted, but the constant talking was making that familiar heat coil in his gut. His patience was slipping.

The man reached out and grasped Krueger's thigh to get his attention, almost making the soldier drop his drink. His eyes narrowed and his fists clenched as he put down his drink and opened his mouth to snarl something rude.

Just then, he felt a large presence behind him and a heavy hand on his shoulder. He relaxed against the familiarity of your towering form.

"Get lost.." you said, almost quietly. But the man looked up, his eyes widening at your hulking body and cold gaze. He was gone in an instant.

Krueger leant back against your chest, placing his hand over yours as the rage faded from his stomach. You were his rock, and he was forever grateful for that. Words weren't needed to express that, so you both stood there in silence and finished your drinks.

KÖNIG

Helping him out in uncomfortable social situations is probably the thing he loves the most. His anxiety gets too much sometimes...

König sits in the corner of the bar, trying to keep his head down and trying to seem a little shorter while he finished his drink. Somehow, that makes him seem even taller. A group of men walk up to his table, looking him up and down.

"Aye, how tall are you big boy?"

"Fuckin' hell you're massive.."

"I bet women drool over you.."

The comments make him scowl to himself, so he just looked down into the foamy top of his beer, wishing they would just disappear.

"What's the problem huh?"

"Can't take a joke?"

Their jeering continued, making the familiar feeling of his throat tightening begin to well up. He tried to slow his breath and swallow, attempting to ignore the men. The room seemed too small and too loud. All until a familiar voice cut through the noise.

"HEY."

König looked up in hope; the men spinning around and only being met with the muscled bulk of your chest.

"The hells going on?" You snapped, making the men glance around to each other and shake their heads. They muttered excuses and quickly left the bar, leaving you with König.

You slid into the seat next to König, ruffling his hair and wrapping an arm around his waist.

"I've got you Colonel.. Do you want to leave?"

König was practically buzzing with gratitude and relief, all he could do was hug you tight. You laughed softly, hugging him back.

PRICE

Price seems to be able to handle himself incredibly well in situations like these. Everyone needs a helping hand once in a while, and you are always glad to be that one for him.

Price goes to bars a lot, but on this particular occasion he just wanted to clear his head. He sat down with his beer, closing his eyes and taking a long sip. He swallowed and rested his head in his hand, just thinking to himself.

All of a sudden he feels a hand slide down his back and he sits up straight, his nerves on edge. The gentle laugh of a woman is heard behind him and he frowns, not in the mood.

"Can I help take your mind of something, sweetheart?" she purrs.

"Yeah, you're looking a little off mate.." another one adds.

To his horror, there was more than one. Great. This is what he got for going to a bar while on duty.

"Move your asses." A cross, familiar voice yells. Price could almost see the hulking shadow of your form moving across the bar. "He's with me."

Price's shoulders relax at the tone of your voice, the group of younger men and women swiftly leaving the bar at the sight of you. You laughed softly, leaning your head down onto his shoulder.

"This doesn't look like the training grounds Captain.." you teased gently, rubbing his arm. "Don't worry, just say you caught me here. I'm willing to do extra duties for you sir.."

Price couldn't stop the warm smile spreading across his lips.

"Thanks kid.."

[adaptacy]

Hear me out-

Johnny with a very stoic, silent reader who is actually really really deadly if that makes sense?? Maybe they met while she was sitting at a bar and ended up getting into a fight with some guy who was bothering Sissy or something, OOH maybe she’s a bouncer, love me a woman who can fight ngl 💕💕 (and very psychotic men but that’s not important-

OOO okay!! honestly i was expecting johnny to be the strong silent stoic type i was so surprised when i played the game and he was a chatterbox douchebag who cant stop talking shit

so i think a stoic type partner could be fun >:)

He and sissy didn't go out very often-- Well, at least not together. Once sissy moved back into the Sawyer house, she remained there most of the time while Johnny was the one to go out and have all the fun.

But, whenever he was absolutely exhausted of her constant nagging him to take her out, he'd let her ride along to a bar while he scouted. He'd immediately regret it as she loudly sang along to the radio, off-tune without a care in the world.

She'd had a lot more experience in the outside world than him, so while she remained at home a lot, she didn't lack social skills. Sissy loved chatting up guys at the bars, and sometimes, once in a blue moon, they'd each bring back someone to the house.

This day was no different. Johnny wasn't having any luck finding girls he deemed interesting, so he excused himself to go to the bathroom as Sissy drank his wallet empty and chatted a couple of guys ears off.

While he was in the bathroom, washing his hands, he heard some kind of commotion outside, and he frowned, assuming that sissy had made some awful mistake that would get them banned from yet another bar. there was a reason why he hated letting her come along.

Yet, when he returned to the bar, sissy being problematic was not what he saw. Instead, it was a woman he'd seen before, but wasn't familiar with. He'd seen her around this very bar a few times, but hadn't ever paid much attention to her. she always had an expression that made her seem busy.

Sissy was sitting in a different bar stool than when he'd left, and she seemed almost startled, but an eerie grin spread over her face as she watched this woman beat the absolute shit out of a guy that Johnny remembered had been talking to her before he'd gone off to the bathroom.

The guy was draped over the bar, and the mystery woman slammed her fist into his face one more time, earning a groggy, blood-strained gurgle from the man before she grabbed him by his collar and dragged him out of the bar.

Whether he wanted to admit it or not, johnny was still a little concerned for Sissy, seeing as how it seemed something had gone terribly awry.

"What the hell happened?" he'd ask, visually checking over the brunette for scratches or bruises or anything, and she'd drunkenly explained that he'd tried to slip something in her drink, even a little too loudly joking about how he was using their own tricks against them.

"Did you drink it?" no, of course she didn't. she didn't have the option to. the woman, who Sissy identified as a bouncer, had stepped in almost immediately and taught the guy a lesson.

Well, Johnny couldn't let that go unseen. So, he left Sissy again, this time to go outside and try his shot at getting to know more about this bouncer. He thanked you, and all you gave him back was a nod. it was your job, after all. why the hell else would you be here?

he'd try to ask more questions, like how you'd noticed, or how long you'd worked here, and you gave him short, one or two word answers, which he found both frustrating and intriguing.

rest assured, he made sure to regular that bar frequently, and would consistently try to get to know you.

Also, he would not try and pull girls from that bar again. not after he saw what you did to that one guy. Johnny wasn't necessarily intimidated, but...

well, if he got kicked out of the bar, he wouldn't get a chance to see you again, and that didn't sound like much fun.

[pinkydevil16]

can we get an epilogue at least?? 😭 please 🙏🏻❤️

You guys have all been so amazing, the support i've had for this series had been overwhelming, thank you everyone whose read it, commented, liked, shared and everyone whose messaged me aswell. Here is an epilogue ❤️

Aemond Targaryen x Targaryen reader: epilogue part 31

"I HATE YOU." Y/n screamed at the top of her lungs, her breathing laboured as she leant against Aemond's chest, her face flushed and blotchy as she pushed. Aemond chuckled kissing her head as she squeezed his hand hard enough to break it.

"You are doing amazing my love, i'm so proud of you, keep pushing." Aemond snuggled into her neck providing her comfort, the midwife between her legs instructing Y/n to give another large push. Y/n screamed in pain, her eyes screwed shut as she pushed a final time, panting as the midwife ran to a wash basin with the bundle in her arms. Y/n and Aemond waiting, Y/n trying to keep her eyes open from exhaustion, Aemond rubbing her arms comforting her with a wide smile on his face. The sound of a baby crying causing Y/n to breath out a loud sigh of relief.

"A boy My Lady." The midwife brought the small babe to the couple, Aemond supporting Y/n to hold the small bundle against her. The violet eyes of the baby staring into theirs, Aemond kissed Y/n once more, his large hands engulfing hers as they held their son.

"Daemon Targaryen." Y/n spoke, Aemond groaned at the name. "You do not get to comment, you didn't push his big head out your cunt." Aemond laughed his arms tightening around the pair.

"Your father will not let me live down our child being named after him. But you are right my love, i got the enjoyable part of putting him in you." Y/n laid her weight against Aemond, her eyes closing as the baby latched onto her breast. A little laugh escaping her at his comment, Aemond requested a wash basin to be brought and Y/n to be cleaned, the maesters entering soon after to check her over. It had been a quick labour according to them although Y/n felt as though it had been longer than her pregnancy, the three sleeping in the same position as they rested, Aemond waking up to latch the babe to his wife and check on her. He did not think he would ever love anything as much as he loved her but looking at his son he could not help his heart swelling with pride and love.

Aemond ran around after his wife for weeks after the birth of their son, refusing to let her raise a finger to do anything, servants working constant hours to provide her with anything the could imagine. A raven had been sent to Rhaenyra to let her know of the birth, her mothers response asking them to bring the babe to Kingslanding once she was healthy and ready to travel. They arrived a moon after Daemon's birth, the pair being greeted, maesters checking Y/n over after the flight. Rhaenyra hugged her daughter tight, her younger brothers Joffrey, Viserys and Aegon hugging her legs excited to see their Nephew. Daemon pat Aemond hard on the back, the two glancing at each other before Daemon hugged his daughter.

"Mother, Father, this is Baby Daemon, our son." Daemon smirked at the name, clasping his hand on his daughter shoulder and kissing her cheek. "A fine name for a prince." Rhaenyra took the babe, he was a beautiful grandson, her first grandchild. "We shall hold a tourney to celebrate my Grandson." She spoke, holding the babe safely whilst linking her arms with her daughters. The took walking ahead with her younger brothers asking many questions wanting their sisters attention. They did not see her often the past two years since their mother had taken the throne but they adored her. Daemon and Aemond walked behind, both with their hands behind their backs, slight comments leaving their mouths. Keeping their voices low so their wives would not hear, they did not need to be told off as they always were. Daemon would never admit to anyone but he had grown midly fond of Aemond, he could tolerate him for his daughter, Aemond felt the same way to Daemon. The two would spar intellectually, a challenge of wit instead of swords.

Y/n and Aemond returned to Dragonstone when Daemon was 3 moons old, Y/n had enjoyed her time with her mother, helping her with diplomatic decisions. She missed her family often but Dragonstone was her home with Aemond, Vhagar enjoyed lounging on the beaches enjoying her elderly years in peace. Aemond stood behind Y/n, his arms around her waist, the two leaning into each other as Y/n rocked their son to sleep. Aemond kissed her neck, breathing her in and enjoying the peace.

"I want a daughter." Y/n spoke quietly, Aemond chuckled against her neck, pulling her against him.

"If my queen asks for a daughter then who am i to deny her." Y/n smile as Aemond turned her around, taking Daemon from her placing him in his cot. Turning back to her Y/n squealed loudly as Aemond threw her over his shoulder, commanding a servant to watch his son. The pair disappearing into their chambers, Y/n's giggles echoing before the doors closed.

Taglist:

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[melswifeasf]

Find my way back to you pt 5

previous chapter || next chapter || series page

Pairing: Samantha Carpenter x Fem!OC

Summary: Estelles past is darker than anyone truly knew. except for one person; Sam Carpenter.

Warnings: angst, description of physical and emotional abuse.

notes: do you guys have anything you’d like to see in this series?

(word count: 6829)

eight years ago

football friday’s were always the best of the fall. everyone including Elias went to watch it. although Elias only went because his sister did and it would be the time in which he sold the most. the first friday into November was no different, Estelle was in a tight black shirt and blue jeans with her hair down as she stood in the parking lot with her girlfriend.

they were arguing. again. it was stupid really, Estelle had been talking with one of Elias clients, the guy had asked for her number but she kindly rejected him. he took it well, smiled and apologized before he walked away. no harm done.

and yet Valerie wasn’t having it and she wasn’t listening to reason. after the whole thing at the party, Valerie had been up her ass about everyone she even looked in the direction of.

“he just asked for my number and i said no!” Estelle repeated for what felt like the hundredth time in the last hour.

Valerie scoffed, “i don’t give a fuck!” she yelled, “you’re always slutting yourself out to the first person you see!”

Estelle felt a twinge of pain in her chest at her words but she covered any trace of that as she tightened her jaw, “fuck you. i’ve been nothing but loyal to you! i told Sam to fuck off after that night and she has! what more do you want?!” the girl said desperately as she threw her hands up.

Valerie took a step closer until she was up in her face, “i want you to close your legs for one god damn minute and treat me like i deserve! you’re fucking pathetic” she said lowly, emphasizing each word with a slight pause.

Estelle’s eyes began to water, no longer able to hold back her pain, “i’ve been nothing but good to you, every time you call i’m there, when you need someone to vent to, i’m there. when you’re horny in the middle of the night and want me to warm your bed, im there so don’t you dare say that i’m not because you know that i am!” Estelle responded her voice growing in volume the more she spoke.

the taller girl shook her head, “the only thing you’re worth is a good fuck. if it weren’t for that i would’ve left your sorry ass a long time ago. don’t you think i get tired of having to be around someone as damaged as you? always crying about how your daddy left? it’s fucking exhausting being around you!” Valerie yelled, the veins on her neck popping out as she threw her hands up angrily.

Estelle chocked back a sob. “fuck you. i’m tired of you too, tired of your constant jealousy, of your shitty self esteem issues and how everything is always about you! i’m tired of you too!” a loud slap echoed throughout the parking lot as Estelle’s hand immediately cupped her face.

she was shocked, her eyes wide as the warm burning sensation was starting to build, both of her hands were shaky and she knew there would be a bruise left by how hard it hit and the ring Estelle knee Valerie always wore on her middle finger.

she didn’t get a chance to say or do anything as her wrists were being gripped tightly in a pair of strong hands, the marks that had already been left behind making it more painful.

Valerie had never been one to refrain herself from yelling, screaming, punching anything near her or simply gripping Estelle’s body tightly in order to show who’s in charge but she had never smacked her. ever.

this was the last straw and Estelle wouldn’t be forgiving her for this one.

“don’t you ever talk to me like that!” Valerie yelled an angry color overtaking her face.

Estelle couldn’t hold back her cries as she winced in pain. before either of them could say anything else a loud voice got both of their attention making them both turn toward it.

“hey! hey!” they heard a familiar voice approach them, “get your fucking hands off of her!” Sam said as she shoved Valerie off of the shorter girl.

Estelle wiped away her tears quickly and began to fix her hair so it was covering the mark that had surely already began to form.

Valerie scoffed, “of course you’re here”

Sam stood extremely close to her, one hand reaching behind her to hold Estelle back. she was standing straight, her lip twitching in anger as she starred the girl down. the two girls were practically the same height but Sam was making it so she looked taller and more intimidating.

“you better walk away before i call the cops” Sam threatened.

Valerie chuckled, “and say what? that you saw me and my girlfriend arguing? seriously, Sam. no one would give a fuck” she said amused.

“i think they’ll be interested in the bruise you gave her? or maybe i should get Elias instead?”

the smirk that was once on Valerie’s lips quickly faded at her words. the color on her face draining in an instant, her posture softening with it. she glanced back at Estelle seeing her desperately wiping away her tears as her body shook.

“whatever” she rolled her eyes and walked up to her car. she opened the door, got inside and slammed it behind her. the engine roared to life and the car screeched against the road as it drove away.

a sigh of relief escaped Sams lips once they were alone. she turned toward Estelle immediately, her hand gently touching Estelle’s arm as she held her hand against her cheek.

“are you okay?” Sam asked softly as she took a step closer.

Estelle shook her head, “i’m fine” she answered curtly. “i need to go” she said and moved her hand away from Sam’s touch.

the Carpenter girl frowned at that, “Estelle..”

“no” Estelle shook her head, “please just leave me alone, Sam.” she said and quickly walked away.

“fuck” Sam muttered as she ran a hand through her hair in frustration

Estelle had tears in her eyes as she walked to her car. she didn’t mean to be such a bitch to Sam but she couldn’t deal with it all. she had enough with her now ex girlfriend and had to find a way to hide the mark she had left from Elias otherwise he’d kill her. literally.

present

the young cop approached her ex and her new boyfriend, she had on her bomber jacket with the word ‘deputy’ on the back. she had recently talked to the cop on duty to watch Tara’s room, by now the girl was on an empty floor so they could keep better track of her. initially she wanted to be the one in charge of the room or to at least help but she had another plan.

she had seen enough stab movies to know exactly what they needed to survive this. reinforcements. Gale Weathers was out of the picture just like Sidney Prescott so she only had one person left.

as soon as her steps could be heard Sam looked away from her boyfriend and at her ex girlfriend, slightly confused. she quickly wiped at her tears. “Estelle? what’s going on? is Tara okay?” she quickly asked glancing behind Estelle to see if she had brought anyone else with her to clue her in on why she was there.

she knew Estelle like the back of her hand, even if the Estelle in front of her now was slightly different then the back talking, law breaker she had met eight years ago, she could still see the old her in a sense. her eyebrow still twitched in anger, she was still fidgety as ever, she still walked as if she owned the place and she was still as beautiful as ever.

Estelle shook her head, “everything’s fine. i was thinking and i have a plan” she said, immediately getting both of their attention.

“what is it?” Sam asked quickly.

the short girl glanced at the boyfriend, she really wanted to tell him he wasn’t a part of this but Sam could say the same about her.

“do you know Dewey?” she asked not sparing the boy another glance to make it clear her words were only directed at Sam.

“the cop from the stab movies?” Richie asked. Estelle still didn’t look at him, ignoring his idiotic question. why was he even here? it’s not like he knew Tara and she knew Sam and him had only been dating for a couple of months so it didn’t click on why he would be willing to stay in danger just to keep Sam company. he had no part in this.

“yeah” Sam nodded, “do you think he’d help?”

Estelle sighed as she shrugged softly, “i used to work with him but he got laid off a couple of months ago. he was a nice guy but i’m not sure how willing he’ll be to be a part of this all over again. but there’s only one way to find out” she said slightly hopeful.

Sam nodded in understanding, “we’ll take my car” she said holding up her keys earning an amused chuckle from Estelle.

“absolutely not. i’m the law here, we’re taking the patrol car. let’s go” she said leaving no room for argument as she began walking toward the elevator.

Richie glanced at his girlfriend with a look of dread, he did not want Estelle to be a part of it but Sam ignored him as she began to follow her ex.

the ride down the elevator was awkward. Richie had his arm wrapped around Sam as he stared at Estelle who was too busy looking at the elevator doors, waiting for them to open. she had a faint smirk on her lips, she knew what he was trying to do but it wasn’t working. in all the time she’s seen the couple Sam hadn’t touched him once, not even to hold his hand or at least she tried to not do it in front of her. when they were together Sam couldn’t keep her hands to herself for even a second. maybe things were different, they were older and the situation they were in isn’t exactly easy but Estelle knew Sam and she was the most possessive person she’d ever known. she always liked that about her.

the elevator doors dinged open revealing a slightly crowded waiting room, she didn’t talk as she reached for her glasses and put them on. it was sunny and warm out, the complete opposite of what it felt like inside the hospital. she hadn’t seen the sun since the day before, the only time she went home was to take a quick shower and that was in the middle of the night where the hospital was less busy so the guard protecting Tara could keep a closer eye on her.

once they walked outside she led them to the patrol car and got inside. Sam followed into the passenger seat whilst Richie got in the back.

“wow. i’m in the back of a cop car” Richie said with a slight chuckle earning an eye roll from Estelle as she chewed her gum louder.

“seatbelts” she said simply as she put her own belt on and put the car in drive.

Estelle didn’t have the radio playing, she was listening to the dispatch to make sure there weren’t any other attacks. the air was uncomfortable and all of them could feel it. even Richie who tried to make conversation but Estelle completely ignored him.

it was Sam who got a word out of Estelle. like always.

“Tara said you were the first one at the house when she was attacked” Sam said glancing at the young girl. “you had a security system in place? i didn’t know you guys were close”

Estelle chuckled, she wasn’t accusing her but it almost felt like she was.

“yeah well, when Elias died she was the only one there for me” she shrugged. that wasn’t completely true, Alex and Xavier had been present for the funeral and even helped her financially for a couple of months but it was different. they were Elias friends, not hers and even though they always took on the older protective brother role just like Elias, they held that sentiment for her because of him. things just weren’t the same when he died and they all slowly lost contact once she decided to be part of the police force.

Sam cleared her throat timidly, “i’m sorry Estelle. i meant to call but-”

the girl held her hand up, “don’t. it’s fine. i get it” i wasn’t important enough, that’s what she wanted to say but she refrained herself from doing so. getting mad at Sam now was useless, she can’t get mad at someone for not loving her as much as she did, for not caring enough. how could she?

Sam didn’t have anything to say either, nothing that could make up for the pain she caused and nothing that could bring him back so she didn’t. it would be useless to do so.

“there was an incident a year ago, someone tried breaking in so i was the one who had the security system in place. i’m the emergency contact” she continued still trying to explain why she was the first person Tara contacted. Sam deserved some kind of explanation, Tara was her sister after all.

“oh” Sam said softly as she glanced at Estelle. “thanks for.. taking care of her” she continued with a slight nod.

Estelle shrugged, “she’s my family, it’s what i do”

if only Estelle knew the weight those words carried in Sams heart.

eight years ago

quiet. complete and utter silence. for two weeks it had been radio silent in the Garcias home. the young girl was wrapped in a blanket in her room, the curtains in her room shut with only a peak of sunlight shining inside.

she hadn’t been two school in that amount of time, barely had a proper meal. she’d already eaten all the fast microwavable meals so she stuck with snacks like granola bars or cereal. it’s not like she had much of an appetite anyway.

she felt empty, nothing but the complete and utter darkness consuming her whole. she was alone. Elias had been arrested two weeks ago which like the domino affect, caused more things to follow. she could feel the pain of that affect still linger on her face and body. she still had a black eye, her lip was cut and there was a huge bruise on her cheek. she hadn’t been able to look at herself in the mirror in a week, every time she did she’d end up crying for hours on end. but she didn’t have to look in the mirror to know she still had a huge bruise on her ribs, it was a dark purple the last time she saw it and it hurt as much as the first day.

Sam hadn’t talked to Estelle since the day she stopped the fight between her and Valerie. she expected that much but what did surprise her was the fact that she had disappeared a week later. no one had heard from her. she knew Elias went to jail after being caught with drugs but she knew he’d never let Estelle go down for it. she had no idea where Estelle was and it was nerve wracking.

so she did the only thing she could think of. she went to school like usual to see if she’d show up Monday but she didn’t so Sam got into her car and drove to her home. she’d been there multiple times whether it was for one of Elias parties or to buy drugs.

Sam had knocked on the door but there was no answer. even rang the doorbell a couple times but there was still no answer. both Estelle and Elias car were parked in the driveway so she knew Estelle had to be home. the tall girl sighed impatiently as she stepped away from the front door and walked to the huge window. it was covered so there was no way for her to see inside and she’s sure one of the neighbors are gonna call the cops considering she looked like she was about to break into the home.

so she went around the back expecting to maybe find the back door open but it was locked. fuck.

Sam defeatedly began to walk back to her car, there was no way inside and Estelle wasn’t answering the door. it’s not like she had her number to text or call her. as she was walking she realized that Estelle’s room was on that side of the house, she had seen her curtains open and her inside the room the last time she went to pick up her usual stuff from Elias. she stopped where she was and glanced up at the window, it was closed and the curtains were closed. there was a tree right beside it, she could possibly climb it but there was no guarantee Estelle would let her in.

the girl wiped her hands off on her pants and began to climb. it was hard to get a grip at first, it’s not like she had any experience climbing trees and her foot kept slipping. eventually she was on the closest branch, she held onto it with one hand and reached for the window with the other. her hand closed into a fist and she knocked. no response. she knocked one, twice and finally at the third knock the curtains were pulled apart roughly to reveal an irritated Estelle.

Sams lips let out a small gasp at the sight of her beaten down state. Estelle’s eye was swollen to the point in which it was slightly closed, it was purple and bruised as well as her cheek. she could see Estelle holding her stomach with one hand making her question if she was injured there too. what the hell happened?

the window abruptly opened and Estelle spoke with an annoyed voice, “what do you want?”

Sams mouth opened and closed for a second, she was speechless. what could she say? she knew if she asked what happened Estelle wouldn’t tell her. she’d learned her lesson the time they talked in the bathroom. but she needed to know, god, she had to. what if she needed help? what if Estelle was in danger? had Valerie done it?

“i-i.. you haven’t been at school. i came to check in on you” Sam finally said. she couldn’t bring up the bruises. not yet.

Estelle rolled her eyes. “im fine. you can go now” she said and stepped away from the window. the young girl expected Sam to take the hint and leave but instead the older girl climbed through it and stepped into the bedroom.

“im serious, Estelle. i’m worried about you.. i mean- look at you” Sam finally said not able to bite her tongue about this. maybe the decision to not ask about the bruises lasted two seconds but she couldn’t stop herself.

Estelle scoffed, “it’s none of your business. please get the fuck out of my house” she continued and pointed at the window. Sam didn’t take her eyes off of her though and Estelle was beginning to grow self conscious. no one had ever seen her like this, it’s why she didn’t go to school and she didn’t want Sam to be the first person to ever witness the fucked up life she had. she wasn’t quite sure why even cared, Sam and her had only kissed once drunkenly and her opinion shouldn’t mean anything to her but it did. she wished it didn’t, wished she could not care that the girl in front of her was seeing her in her most vulnerable state.

the older Carpenter girl finally moved from her spot and walked toward the window. Estelle expected her to leave and to finally be alone again but instead Sam closed it and the curtains in the process.

Estelle sighed heavily, “what are you doing?” she sounded as exhausted as she felt and Sam just wanted to pull her into a tight hug and not let go. Estelle would never let that happen though.

“im staying” Sam shrugged as if it were the most simple answer ever. “you can kick me out if you want but i’m staying” she said firmly and Estelle knew that there was truly no room for discussion.

“whatever” she shook her head and climbed back into bed.

-

Tuesday

Estelle had slept through most of the day. it was dark out now and when she reached for her phone she saw it was seven. the girl slowly threw the covers off of her and got out of bed. she needed to take some pain killers, the bruise on her stomach was only growing in pain and she couldn’t deal anymore. she had been taking Tylenol and ibuprofen but neither worked, she’d still feel the pulsing in her face and stomach region. she was so tired of the pain. so instead of reaching for the pill bottles beside her bed she went into her brothers room. she knew where he stored his drugs, in the safe stuffed inside closet. the combination was her birthday. she always thought that was sweet.

the girl grabbed the weed stored in a ziplock bag as well as the rolling paper. she didn’t have much of any experience with it but she wasn’t going to take hard drugs which was the only thing Elias had so weed would have to do.

she didn’t bother walking out of the room to smoke it, she didn’t need the smell lingering anywhere else in the house and Elias room always reeked of weed anyway. she opened the window like she’d seen her brother do countless times before and lit up the small joint. ten minutes later (which she mostly spent coughing) the small bud was too small so she put it out on the ashtray sitting on the outside part of the window.

her throat felt as dry as her eyes, this was why she never smoked. her hands were tingling and the pain was long forgotten, it was instead replaced by dizziness. she wasn’t super high but enough to feel her heart racing in her chest faster than usual. she’d regret this later - possibly but at least she wasn’t in pain anymore.

the girl held onto her stomach with her left hand and held onto the railing with the other as she walked down the steps.

she’d spent all day sleeping she had almost forgotten Sam had told her she’d be staying the day before. truthfully she fully expected Sam to be gone by now but instead of being met with an empty house she saw Sam in the kitchen making what looked to be spaghetti.

had she gone shopping? there was nothing in the fridge or cabinets to make food, especially not considering Elias was the one who did the grocery shopping and he was arrested before he could go on his weekly errand. all of the frozen food that was there was stored just in case they were low on money, Elias hated when his sister ate it. he always said she needed real food.

“what are you still doing here?” Estelle asked with a slight rasp to her voice. she ignored Sam as she prepared a plate near the stove and went to the fridge for a bottle of water.

“i told you i was staying,” Sam shrugged as if it were the most obvious this - which it was but Estelle never thought she’d be serious about it. “and you haven’t eaten all day so sit” she said and pointed at the dining room table.

Estelle glanced at it for a split second and then at the plate that was already resting on the kitchen island. without a second thought she grabbed the plate and began walking to her room.

she wouldn’t be keeping someone company when she didn’t even want them in her house.

-

Wednesday

much like Tuesday Estelle spent most of the day sleeping. she had gone back to her brothers to smoke another joint. this wasn’t like her, she’d never dug into his stash before, it didn’t matter how bad her beatings were but this was the worst it’d ever been. she’d usually be healed in a week tops two but she knew this wouldn’t be going away for another two weeks meaning she wouldn’t be attending school for almost a month. the only way she’d show her face would be if the bruises on her face faded to the point in which she could cover them with makeup. it didn’t really matter if the bruise on her stomach went away by then, she’d endure that pain like she always would.

it was just too painful this time around. tylenol wouldn’t cure the pain and she needed something stronger. even if she hated weed, even if she hated what it had to done to her brother and the people around her. she was a hypocrite but she couldn’t find a single part of her that cared. she deserved this, after everything she’d been through she deserved this.

once she felt high enough she locked the drugs away - except for a small bag that was still in her hand and went downstairs where she was sure Sam still was. she hadn’t heard the front door open all day and she had heard the television playing some comedy movie from her room. it was ridiculous that she was still there. seriously, Estelle couldn’t understand what she wanted.

like expected the girl was sitting on the couch intently watching the movie playing on the screen. there was just something different this time around, she wasn’t wearing the same clothes as before and there was a duffle bag sitting on the floor beside the fireplace.

“why are you here?” Estelle spoke abruptly causing Sam to flinch and whip her head around to face the smaller girl. she was slightly shocked at first but recovered almost instantly.

“i told you already, im not leaving you alone like this” she answered earning an eye roll from Estelle.

“seriously Sam. what the fuck do you want? drugs? fine. here” she said throwing a bag of weed to the girl along with oxy. Sam was obviously confused as she looked down at the bag that landed beside her. “you don’t even have to pay me. it’s all covered just please leave me the fuck alone” Estelle said pissed off by now. who did she think she was coming to her house and staying like they knew each other? like they were friends?

Sam didn’t move a muscle toward the bag as she looked back at the girl, “i don’t want drugs, Estelle. i just don’t think you should be alone right now” she said calmly.

Estelle scoffed, “what the fuck do you even know about it? you know nothing about me. you think we kiss once while i’m wasted and i’m in love with you? please, Sam. you’re just a fucking junkie and i’d never get with someone like you” she fired at the girl angrily.

Estelle knew she had hurt Sam by the look on her face, she regretted it as soon as she said it. the pained look in Sams eyes was enough for Estelle’s chest to tighten in pain. “maybe you’re right” Sam said. “maybe i’m a junkies who isn’t to your standards but i can’t just leave you like this Estelle. you are in obvious pain, you can’t stand without holding onto something and don’t even get me started on your eye!” she exclaimed and began to stand.

Estelle rolled her eyes again, “you don’t know shit about this Samantha. this isn’t any of your business so just leave me the fuck alone” she yelled at the taller girl. she didn’t bother listening to Sam stubbornly tell her she wasn’t going anywhere as she turned around and walked back up to her room, slamming the door behind her in the process.

-

Thursday

there’s a certain point in which a human can go without breaking down. that point for Estelle was ten days after the incident took place. she’d cried before, sure, but not like this. not with sobs racking her body like an avalanche, not with tears rushing down her face with no sign of ever stopping, not with her chest tightening and her lungs rapidly running out of oxygen. she couldn’t breathe, she couldn’t see and all she could feel was herself slowly drowning in her pain.

it wasn’t just the pain physically, it was emotional and she couldn’t deal with it anymore. she was so fucking damaged and she had no idea how she would ever feel like a normal person again. she had internal and external scars that she knew would never ever go away. it didn’t matter how much alcohol she took, how much weed she smoked, how many times she tried to disguise that pain with it of her girlfriends emotional abuse. she’d always just be this.

the other teen in the house could hear the loud crying from the living room. it was dark outside by now and she had been hearing her cries for the part hour. when the day started she thought it would progress like it had the last couple of days but Estelle never opened her door and went to her brothers room to get high, she didn’t go downstairs to grab a plate of food or lash out on her again.

she simply didn’t leave her room.

Sam had made dinner for them both and she wanted to apologize to Estelle and let her know that if she really wanted her to leave, she would. she understood it was weird to be in her house, they barely knew each other but she’d known all about Estelle’s father leaving and her mother dying. she knew Elias was the only person Estelle had and now he was in jail. she couldn’t leave her alone. not when she was in so much pain.

Estelle heard a soft knock on her door causing her to quickly pull the blanket up to her lips to try and cover up her crying.

Sams voice was gentle and it hurt Estelle even more how sensitive she was being toward her, “i made some soup” she said. “you don’t have to come out, i can bring it up for you. but..” Estelle heard the girl trail off and even though she couldn’t see her, she could almost see Sam biting her bottom lip with her eyebrows furrowed as she thought about what to say next. “if you want.. maybe we can watch a movie. i don’t know but whatever you need just let me know”

Estelle didn’t come down to grab food or watch the movie Sam offered that day.

-

Friday

hot water ran down Estelle’s nude body. at first it made her wince whenever it would hit her stomach region or when it landed anywhere on her face but it all slowly numbed.

she hadn’t showered since Monday, the pain was too much. it felt good, refreshing even, to finally wipe away the dried blood along with the dried tears from all the crying she had done the night before.

the girl soon turned the water off and stepped out of the shower. her mirror was slightly foggy but she could still make herself out. her eyes was only slightly better, it wasn’t that swollen but she still couldn’t open it all the way. the color hadn’t changed and the bruise on her cheek was only healing in pain. maybe that was because of the drugs though. she didn’t bother looking at her stomach, both the pain and the bruise hadn’t changed at all.

she threw on a pair of sweatpants and one of her brothers hoodies before stepping out of the bathroom. her hair was wet and water droplets were hitting the floor along with her hoodie.

she took a deep breath and then opened her bedroom door. it was time to stop being a bitch. time to grow up and realize she had someone in her house that was going through all this effort just to make sure she wasn’t alone.

as soon as she stepped down from the last step she saw Sam on the couch and scrolling through her phone. she didn’t seem to notice Estelle’s presence and the shorter girl wasn’t going to any efforts to alert her.

the younger girl walked to the kitchen and grabbed a clean plate, the noise finally grabbing Sams attention. she locked her phone and placed it on the table beside her as she turned her body to look at Estelle. none of them spoke.

Estelle quietly grabbed some food and put it in the microwave. two minutes later she was walking toward Sam with a bowl of food in one hand along with a bottle of water in the other. she was severely dehydrated at this point.

the girl silently sat down on the furthest end of the couch whilst Sam was still sat on the other. Estelle placed her bottle of water on the coffee table and got comfortable where she was. Sam tried not to look at her as she watched the television. the shorter girl took a bite out of the food and her eyes widened, it was amazing. she wasn’t sure if that was the hunger talking but either way was visibly pleased.

Estelle realized Sam wasn’t going to any efforts to talk which made her sigh. “im sorry” she finally said.

Sam glanced at her with a neutral expression. damn, Estelle couldn’t help but think she had been a bigger dick than she realized. that was a stupid thought considering she’d literally called her a junkie.

“i was really fucked up and i didn’t mean any of the stuff i said” she continued hoping Sam would say something - anything.

her hopes weren’t let down as Sam finally turned to look at her, “it’s fine. you were just saying shit. i know how it goes” she shrugged. Sam was playing it down and Estelle didn’t feel like she deserved that.

“it’s not okay, though. you’re not a junkie and frankly what you do isn’t any of my business. and if we’re being honest it’s me who doesn’t deserve you, not the other way around” Estelle admitted with a soft chuckle.

Sam didn’t say anything but Estelle could see a faint smile appear on her lips and that was enough for her to know she had accepted her apology. but Estelle knew that wasn’t enough, she needed to tell someone. even if it was someone she’d barely known, even if it was one of her brothers clients. she just couldn’t keep this to herself anymore and Sam had done nothing but tried to be there for her these last couple of days.

the young girl placed her bowl on the table in front of her before leaning back on the couch. what she would be saying wasn’t something that could be taken lightly, it was heavy shit and she just really hoped it wouldn’t scare Sam away. “i was ten years old when my mom died” Sam didn’t move a muscle or say anything but Estelle knew she was listening. “my dad had always been an abusive asshole but one day he was really drunk and his fists were hitting a lot harder until suddenly she just stopped breathing” tears were already forming in Estelle’s eyes and she felt pathetic for it. “but he’s a lawyer so he got his most important contacts to rule it an accident and he got left off the hook easily. no one really knew what happened, it was a closed casket funeral and everyone loved him so no one ever thought he’d be capable of such a thing” she chuckled dryly.

Sam felt tears forming in her own eyes at Estelle’s words. she knew what it was like losing a parent but she couldn’t begin to imagine what Estelle went through. sure, her father left but she knew he was still alive, somewhere out there but still alive. Estelle didn’t have that privilege.

“after she died i was his next punching bag. he wasn’t home much considering he couldn’t live with his own guilt but on the rare occasion he did come home, he’d be drunk and angry and he always said i looked like her so he’d come into my room at night and..” she trailed off as her voice broke and Sam didn’t need her to finish her sentence to know what she meant. the hand that was resting on Sams lap made its way toward Estelle. the girl was staring at her lap so she didn’t notice Sam was reaching for her hand until she was holding it.

the shorter girl looked up at Sam with teary eyes and Sam shot her a comforting smile. and it did just that.

“it didn’t last long, once Elias turned sixteen he started to realize what he was doing and one night while… it was happening he came into the room and fought back. my dad always was afraid of him so he when Elias threatened to tell everyone how my mom actually died, he left town and left us alone” Estelle said and wiped at her tears. “but he was angry he had to move away so he stopped giving us money which led to Elias selling drugs.”

Sam squeezed the girls hand to show she was still listening. “we knew if we called CPS he’d just win them over and move back in so we didn’t bother. things were fine up until the first time Elias got arrested. my dad knew he wasn’t home so he came back and..” she couldn’t finish her sentence again but Sam still understood what she meant. “i begged him to pay bail but he never did, he knew he had an advantage. once Elias was released he knew what he did to me and told all of my moms family. after that they started helping out and some even offered us a place to stay but Elias never wanted to” Estelle shrugged.

Sam frowned, “why not?” she wasn’t sure if asking was insensitive but that didn’t sound like Elias, considering he tried to protect Estelle as much as he did, why wouldn’t he want to give her a better life with a stable home and family.

“i guess he just didn’t trust anyone else after my dad” Estelle shrugged once more. “but he promised to be more careful so he wouldn’t get arrested again. up until almost two weeks ago” she continued with a sigh. “my dad came back to town the day after he was.”

Sams stomach dropped at her words. she hadn’t put two and two together but now she knew how Estelle got the bruises. how could a father do that to his own daughter?

“he didn’t.. yknow touch me like that but he was pissed off that he got a call saying his son is in jail and now that he’s in a committed relationship, he was mad that he had to stop his new life to come back here. he took it out on me and yeah” Estelle said as if it were no big deal.

Sam shifted closer to the girl hesitantly but once she was sure Estelle wasn’t going to move away she continued to move closer until she could wrap an arm around the girls petite body. “i know there’s nothing i could ever say to heal what happened to you and i’m so sorry that it did. that man is a shitty person and i promise i won’t let him get near you again” she said firmly making Estelle smile as she let her head fall on the girls chest.

“you gonna be my knight and shinning armor miss Carpenter?” Estelle joked.

Sam shrugged with a sheepish smile. “maybe. i might steal your heart after all” she joked back.

but Estelle knew she wasn’t joking. “maybe you already have” she said lowly as she moved impossibly closer to Sam. the taller girl held her even tighter in response.

she deserved someone like her, someone who cared enough to endure shitty words and the cold shoulder and even an uncomfortable couch simply just to show she wasn’t alone. Estelle deserved a love that wouldn’t leave her. one that would be unconditional and one that wouldn’t cause her harm whether that’s emotional or physical.

she deserved to be loved by someone that cared enough to stay.