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#and thats what you have to do as a fucking writer is ask the hard question and be ready to scrap characters and ideas to answer them
poisonheiress · 3 months
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Someone needs to say it: The "Heaven is actually bad" plot line that Hazbin is based around is useless when you spend more then 2 minutes thinking about Vivzie's Hell and her characters.
Besides it being much too early for this idea, the revelation that Heaven or at least the beings running it aren't good people has little to no impact when the people who are being harmed by this are all horrible people. Stay with me here. None of these people are people who were unfairly brought into hell and we are never ever introduced to someone who was either. Why should we care that Heaven is "evil" and blocking redemption when all the sinners in hell we see are the worst of the worst who would have never gotten in even if it was fair.
For the "Heaven is bad" plot line to actually work, you need people who were just one sin away from Heaven, who would've gotten into Heaven if circumstance hadn't forced them down a path that stole it from them. You need characters who aren't comedic villains but land in the middle of morally grey. Those who deserved to be in Heaven but because Heaven refused to consider their circumstances, they were tossed to burn with people much worse than them. Those are the people who should be your main cast cause those are the people who would actually be impacted by Heaven being bad/ Heaven lying.
Angel dust, for all his trauma, was still part of the mafia and likely had killed people before (showing to almost take joy in it). Husk became an overlord and gambled souls, so he had to have had blood on his hands before hell. Alastor is a serial killer, and the list goes on and on. Sure, these characters are (somewhat) interesting, but they don't make for good characters to have when the key plot line is that Heaven is a scam. Even if that fact is true, none of them were ever going to get there in the first place and this is something we also se in every single background sinner shown in Hell too. They were never close to getting there, so why would they or we care that Heaven is bad when all sinners are shown to be horrific people who are at best in the dark grey area of morality.
If you look at it from the "angel's are unfairly killing sinners" route, it still doesn't work. If the angels are killing them, what makes it different then the sinner on sinner violence that hell is full off? Why is them dying by angels this bad thing when they are just as likely if not 10x times more likely to get knifed in the back by other sinners in hell the other 364 days, especially when everyone here apparently is just as horrible as the next person. You cannot condemn the angels for killing demons and then make a joke of out sinners killing each other and never show sinners who doesn't want to kill people. Life either matters or it doesn't and when the main cast doesn't even show a care for life (outside of Charlie's who's entire flaw is her naivety), why should the audience.
On top of that, Vivzie's whole overpopulation aspect and the Heaven plot line would connect better if she actually had people like those I mentioned above, people who stole to survive but got tossed out cause stealing is technically wrong, people who killed another to protect someone else but were still sent to hell because even though they saved that person's life that person wasn't supposed to be saved, people who passively engaged in sins but never really did anything harmful under them. This would add into how Hell is so overpopulated and highlight why its so important that Heaven is evil/ why Charlie's plan isn't just a naive pathetic fever dream.
In the end, Vivzie should have never made Heaven the central plot of this show nor tried to assign this blatant good vs evil to that conflict. Neither her characters nor her writing choices are able to respond to this conflict in a way that will end or even tell the story in a satisfactory manner.
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savannahsdeath · 9 months
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hii i have a little ellie request. so can we maybe have an enemies to lovers where reader and ellie “hate each other” but in reality ellie just wants to be with reader and she ends up using the strap roughly bc reader didn’t wanna confess after years? (sorry this seems long😭)
i absolutely love this idea omg??
ELLIE WILLIAMS X READER
PART1ONE
part 2two
mdni please<3
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warnings: 18+!! smut, 'enemies' to lovers, strap (r!receiving), mean!ellie kinda??, rough!ellie, reader is also mean at first !!
writers note: i love receiving requests like yall are so creative and idkk its just easier to write a req than my own idea🫣🫣 also this turned out to be longer than i expected (my longest fanfic yet!) but even the anon said it seems long so ig thats how its supposed to be🙏
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It was another PE lesson you hate so much. It wouldn't be that bad, if not the fact that you're in the same team with Ellie. Ellie fucking Williams.
She would get mad at you for every little mistake you made. You absolutely hated her.
You had to admit she was... pretty. Especially when she had the mix of mad and stern expression on her face. Sometimes you provoked her just to watch her insult every little thing about you she could but you didn't mind. You just sat there with a smirk, sometimes making a mockingly worried face to piss her off even more. Sometimes. Sometimes you weren't in mood for that and you'd actually get offended. Sometimes even hurt. But you couldn't really blame her, that's how it works.
This day, you were literally rescuing your team. Every point was because of you. Every 'that was close' situation was only 'close' because of you. But your luck, or whatever made you win, had to run out eventually. You missed one time.
"What happened? Got holes in your hands? Tired? Not so good anymore?" Ellie asked you with that mocking tone.
Everyone ignored your interaction - they knew what's starting and they didn't want to get involved in that.
"I've done pretty much everything for this team, and the only thing you do is complain, Williams." You said and you could feel your temper rising.
Ellie didn't hesitate to respond to that.
"Well at least I don't do a half-ass job like you. You're really so full of yourself, aren't you? Why not just give up and let someone actually capable take over, huh?" She barked sarcastically.
The other team members didn't even try to hide their excitement now, they just sat back and enjoyed the show, even the teacher was having a hard time holding back the grin on his face whenever Ellie came up with a new insult.
And now, there was no going back.
"Oh, I'm sorry Williams, did your precious little ego get hurt from that? Are my skills threatening your so-called pride? Well if you don't like it, suck it up." You shot back.
If this kept up, you were going to end up with another detention for sure. Everyone knew that you two were like oil and water, but nobody really expected you to get into a shouting match over PE class. Especially, not this early in the morning.
The teacher finally decided that it was enough trouble, and he stepped between the two.
"Ladies, settle down! If you can't figure out how to work well together in a simple PE session, then you'll need more than one detention to figure it out. Go sit down." He ordered, and you two sat down, next to each other.
As if following a silent order, all the other students just went about their business and pretended like nothing had happened.
"You should learn how to shut up sometimes." You said quietly, nervously playing with your fingers.
"You should stop thinking you're so damn important." She snapped back, completely ignoring your advice as she stared at you with the same icy cold look as before.
The teacher came over to the two of you and handed you a form, which you quickly read over. "Maybe it's rough but that's what you both deserve after arguing in every single class. And if that won't help... I don't know what will. Someone will check in on you from time to time, so don't even think about anything, understood?."
In short, the file was saying you'll have spent a month after school doing little school works, like cleaning the gym, with her. It was a frequent way of dealing with problematic students in your school.
You weren't even surprised - the teacher was right. Your little bickers were the main gossip topic and there was no way they'll go unnoticed.
Still, you couldn't help but frown.
"You've got to be kidding me." You muttered under your breath. Spending a month after school doing odd jobs with Ellie was literally the last thing you wanted to do. You knew there was some sort of punishment coming, but this was extreme.
Ellie overheard your muttering, and she rolled her eyes. "It's just a bunch of cleaning, what's wrong, can't handle a little hard work?" She mocked.
"And why are you so happy? Maybe you wished to spend more time with me?" You chuckled, finally looking up at her.
Ellie seemed caught off guard, but she quickly recomposed herself. "Who said I was happy? Sure, I'll love to see you grovel and scrub floors while I sit back and relax." She replied in a sarcastic tone.
You decided to press your advantage, and give Ellie a dose of her own medicine. "Aww, is someone actually admitting that they like spending time with me? I'm so honored." You said with an overdramatized fake fluster.
Ellie didn't even let you finish your sentence before she cut in with her usual sarcastic tone. "Pfff, don't get so ahead of yourself there." She chided. Even then, you could hear some slight annoyance in her voice.
Ellie may have been a jerk, but there was something about her you couldn't help but like. You couldn't explain it, but you liked this banter between the two of you.
Oh, who were you trying to lie to? You liked her. You were just good at hiding it.
You were just about to open your mouth to respond to Ellie's last snarky remark, when you were cut off again.
"Enough."
You both turned to see the teacher staring at the two of you. He sounded more annoyed than before, and you decided it was better to stop your feud before you got in any more trouble.
"You two are already going to spend a month together doing odd jobs. The last thing we need is for you to add another week to that sentence." He warned.
You wanted to say something back, but you decided to shut up before the teacher had to make it worse. You and Ellie just looked at each other for a couple of seconds, before you rolled your eyes and got up from your seat.
After a few more classes, the time of  fulfilling your penalty came. You sat down at the gym benches, waiting for Ellie. You waited, and waited, but no one came.
Ellie was faster than you with getting up. She smirked and said; "Well it's not like you actually had anything worth saying anyway, so it's easier for you." With that parting jab, she walked out of the gym.
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You expected something like that from her, so you stood up and a few minutes later you were standing in front of her room. You knocked to the door, patiently waiting for her to answer.
After a few moments, you heard footsteps, before the door finally opened. Ellie stood in front of you, her face as annoyed as ever.
"What do you want?" she grumbled, clearly not in the mood to be bothered right now.
"Uh, hello? We're supposed to be doing the clean-up, remember? You haven't forgotten, right?" You said, trying to stay as polite as you could.
She sighed and motioned for you to come in, clearly not ready to go just yet.
You slowly stepped into Ellie's room, your eyes taking in the decorations and mess. It was clear that this was Ellie's world, but you couldn't help but feel a slight curiosity towards her.
"So, why exactly weren't you at the gym?" You asked, finally breaking the tension. You didn't want her thinking you were here to start another argument.
"I had stuff to do." Was the terse response you were met with, nothing else.
"Yeah, of course." You rolled your eyes. "Your room could use some cleaning too."
Ellie smirked when your tone turned from polite to annoyed when she gave you her response, but you couldn't help but notice that she slightly recoiled when you mention how messy her room was. For someone with such a sharp tongue, she sure wasn't enjoying that same kind of treatment.
"Oh yeah? So maybe we should have you clean my room instead." She shot back.
"Actually, boarding school is still school, so that'd count too." You smirked, not so sarcastically anymore. You'd really rather stay in her room than running all over the building with a mop and dirty cloths.
Ellie raised one eyebrow at your reply, clearly not expecting you to just accept it without some kind of snarky remark or argument.
"Alright then." She replied simply, and she walked over to her bed and started to clear out the clutter. You couldn't really deny that her room was in a pretty messy state.
You explored the room, looking for something to start with.
Just then, near other scattered clothes, you saw feminine underwear. Clearly not hers.
"Um, Ellie..." You laughed. "Who's this?"
She walked up to you, not seeming surprised or embarrased at all. "I dunno. There's lots of girls visiting." She smirked.
You knew the smart thing to do would be just to drop the topic, but your curiosity got the best of you. Just who was Ellie Williams hanging out with?
"Really? And how many of them leave a pair of underwear in your room as a souvenir?" You asked, trying to keep a straight face, but you couldn't help but be amused by the situation.
Ellie just laughed, and you couldn't help but grin at her confidence in that moment.
"If you're asking if I'm dating someone," Ellie said, looking at you with an amused expression, "then no. I wouldn't call it dating."
You knew Ellie was always too stubborn and proud to just admit it normally, so you decided to push her just a little bit further.
"So it's not just a single person then? What's it? A new girl every day?" you asked with a smirk, knowing you'd hit a nerve there.
The slight flicker of annoyance on Ellie's face told you that you'd hit the mark.
"So what if it is? Are you jealous?" She teased in response, just adding fuel to the fire.
Now, she had the smirk on her face, and you just knew you'll regret what you started.
"Not really. Everyone knows you fuck every girl in the school anyways. Well, almost every." You suggestively pointed at yourself. "That's honestly sad. You should focus on one person, don't you think?"
Ellie took this as a challenge, she just couldn't resist it when you made yourself the exception.
"Oh, you think you're a special case? How cute." She snickered, and you couldn't help but feel somewhat pleased with that response after how much you two had been annoying each other for the past month.
"What do you think, should I consider dating you? It seems like you're interested, isn't that why you keep sticking around?" She asked, looking at you, knowing very well what kind of effect her words were gonna have on you.
"Me? Interested? You're the one finding excuses to talk to me every day, even if it's just another argument!" You shook your head and looked down, trying to hide that your smirk turns into a honest smile.
You felt Ellie's eyes studying your face as you tried to hide your genuine happiness, you tried to play it off, but you knew that it wasn't working in your favor. You couldn't even deny it, because it was true, you were interested in Ellie. Maybe not at first, but after spending time together, you grew to like her, her arrogance, her wit, the snarky smile on her face... and her eyes.
"Oh, so you do care!" She quickly cut in, sensing your weakness as your smile grew.
"Come on, don't tell me you've been enjoying this little game of ours, haven't you? Don't you look forward to it every day? Don't you love the adrenaline that kicks in when you're about to say something that's bound to start an argument?" She asked, taking a step closer to you and lowering her voice.
You could almost see the sparks fly as the two of you stared at each other, both feeling the tension in the air. You were almost tempted to take her up on the offer, but your pride got the best of you.
"You're just full of yourself, aren't you? Thinking everybody craves that attention." You said after taking a deep breath.
Ellie just smiled and walked straight to you, getting up close and personal.
"Well, I know you want it. So stop putting up a facade and admit it."
"I'm not like these sluts you fuck, Williams." You said, trying to keep your voice steady and calm.
Ellie just smirked in response. "You're right, you're not like them. You're better than them. And maybe you are a little special, considering how much you manage to piss me off everyday." She took a step back and looked you up and down. "I kinda like it." She said, and you couldn't help but feel your heart rate go up a little when she said that.
You just stared back at Ellie, not really sure what else to say in this situation. Both of your egos were too big to give the other one satisfaction, and neither would be making the first move.
She finally spoke up; "Your turn to be honest now. Admit you're into me."
She was awfully close to you now, daring you to say something.
"Don't push it, Ellie." You told her confidently, and even though you really wanted to say it, your pride was holding you back from admitting it.
Ellie just smirked and moved even closer to you, until her face was just an inch away from yours. "Say it." She whispered.
You felt your heart pounding faster as you just looked at her, not able to break her stare.
You shook your head. "No way."
She just chuckled at your response. "I knew you'd say that. And now, I'm gonna make you say it yourself."
Before you could even comprehend what was happening, Ellie pulled you close, just enough to make your lips meet. You just stood there, completely stunned by how bold she was, but at the same time, the feeling of her lips against yours was so new and so good as well. You hadn't felt this type of rush before, and you didn't want it to end.
You couldn't stop yourself from letting out a gasp followed by a moan into the kiss, which made her even bolder.
"I'll show you how lucky those so-called by you sluts are." She whispered after pulling away from you, but not for long.
While Ellie's mouth aggresively covered yours, you felt her slowly pushing you towards the bed.
You were barely able to think now, as your adrenaline was pumping through your whole body. Your back hit the mattress, and Ellie continued to push you down as she climbed up onto the bed on top of you.
That's when it hit you.
You realized that your little feud with Ellie wasn't going to end after all, except this time you weren't fighting her.
Instead, you were just enjoying the moment with someone you could almost call a friend.
It felt like there was nothing else in the universe, just a rush of new sensations that you didn't want to end.
Ellie was the one in control now, as you felt her body pressing up against you, her lips pressing against yours, her hands moving around your body without hesitation. You weren't even thinking straight anymore, you just let her embrace you, letting her take control entirely.
You felt her break the kiss for a moment, just to whisper something in your ear. "Say it."
You knew what she wanted you to say, but you just couldn't bring yourself to do so.
Before you could answer, you felt her slowly undressing you. Her lips were tracing paths along your throat, not letting you let out a logical word from it - only little whimpers.
You felt every curve of her body as you felt her lips against your neck, every touch sending chills down your spine.
When you felt her hands move towards your pants, you felt your body respond in the only way you could.
You couldn't think of anything else but her embrace, her warm breath against your neck, and your body slowly being freed from clothing.
Ellie knew exactly how to push your buttons.
Before you could catch your breath, you were left shaking, as her hand slipped into your underwear, which was soon on the floor too. She was teasing your clit in almost painful slow way, watching you squirm.
"Speak up, babe." She whispered mockingly.
But you couldn't. Not because you didn't want, or because your ego didn't let you - you just couldn't. You even asked yourself 'What does this girl wants from me?' as you already forgotten her previous wish. You just weren't thinking straight.
"Come on, do this for me." She kept looking at you with overdramatic concern. You saw her fastening her belt and sliding of her jeans, revealing an obviously-way-too-big strap, which purple color didn't surprise you at all as you imagined it the same way in your dreams.
When you finally came back to your senses, you constructed a whole full sentence answer. But as soon as she saw you opening your mouth to speak up, she slid a few inches of her toy into your soaking cunt. Your planned reply quickly got replaced with another gasp.
"What's the matter? Cat got your tongue?" She smirked, her hips started thrusting. She had some sympathy for you, so she didn't make it too painful, but she wasn't also so merciful.
You cried out, at first clenching your thighs from surprise, but she was too strong for you to actually succeed.
You leaned your head back against the pillow, squeezing your eyes shut causing a few of your pathetic tears soak into the sheets.
She held your hips, so she won't miss your sensitive spot, but her grip was so hard you swore you can already see the bruises creating right beneath her fingers.
"Honestly, I'm really happy it ended like that. You have no idea how often I'd imagine you instead of some random girl. But it's good to have you really there." She chuckled, not slowing down but not speeding up either.
Your eyes opened wide at this confession. Before today, the nicest thing she said to you was 'what's wrong?', even though it was in an obviously mocking way. And know it turns out she liked you for a long time. Just like you liked her.
"W...Wh- What?" You managed to stutter out, leaning on your elbows to look at her before your vision turned blurry again so you fell back on the pillow.
"You didn't know?" She laughed. "I mean, you were always oblivious, so I shouldn't be shocked but... I thought it was clear." She was speaking slower than usual as every single word coming from her mouth was synced with the moves of her hips. While saying this simple thing, she pushed her strap into you at least twenty times. And she wasn't taking her time, oh, no. She was fast and rough, like you're just a sex toy without feelings. Did you mind? Hmmm...
When you started getting used to the size of her cock and your mind wasn't completely blank anymore, you remembered one important thing your PE teacher said. 'Someone will check in on you from time to time, so don't even think about anything.' None of you were either at the gym or putting up flyers around school. They're going to think you ditched it. Even though you'd rather get into more trouble than end whatever you were doing now, you felt you need to tell Ellie, just in case.
"El-s..." You moaned out and quickly realised it won't be easy.
"What is it?" She asked, seeming honestly interested in what you got to say. "Ready to admit you're absolutely obsessed with me?"
You clenched your fists, squeezing the bed sheets between your fingers.
"Th- no... We should..." You couldn't help but cry out again.
As soon as she heard the two keywords - 'we should' (and she hated when someone was telling her what to do, so that pissed her off) - she understood what you're trying to say.
"Behave? Fulfill our duties? Or...?" She chuckled.
You wanted to speak up, just to not feel so vulnerable as you really were. You only managed to mumble 'we' before one of her hands started rubbing your clit, just like at the start - painfully slow. The feeling made your thighs tense and move closer to each other, wanting to close the gap between them. But Ellie didn't let that happen as she quickly separated your legs.
Her hips also didn't stop moving, and all the sensations connected made you go silent again. Well, not silent - unable to speak. And that were two completely different things.
"I'd take that as a 'we should continue what we're doing right now'. Isn't that what you want?" Even though you're eyes were closed, you could feel her intense stare on you. Then, her mocking tone came back. "What is it with you being so quiet all of sudden? You spent a few of the past years yelling at me, and you can't even say a word now?"
"I ju-st..." You said but then she hit your g spot again, and again, and again... making you go silent.
Your stomach started feeling funny - probably because of how deep in it Ellie's strap was. At this point, you thought you can even feel it in your throat and that's what's blocking your words from coming out. But the funny feeling had a different origin - your release was getting awfully close, and it didn't go unnoticed.
"We're going to have lots of fun this month." She whispered, leaning in to stroke your cheek.
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runaeveena · 3 months
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Your dashboard if you were in a d&d fantasy world still involved in fictional erotica discourse part 2
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⛰️ berenicesblade Follow
now that the new Mountain Angel volume has come out can we please tag spoilers, some of us are still waiting for our pigeon mail
🦚 faeynadaughter Follow
you can access the volume in full on TomePlane!
🎭 bardcampistrash Follow
until TomePlane acknowledges that its interplanar storage is made possible by binding aboleths to the plane and killing them then we are going to continue not using that platform, thanks
🦚 faeynadaughter Follow
aboleths killed my cousin who was a royal cleric. ill never understand why theres a whole movement to protect abyssal creatures when theyve caused so much damage to our kingdoms. and disliking a pocket dimension which provides thousands of people access to books? your attitude reeks of anti literaturism and mal-aligned virtue signaling and im not sure which is worse
🫒 tenthday237 Follow
Aliizya gets pregnant on page 62
⛰️ berenicesblade Follow
banished
620 Notes
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🏰 finchtruther Follow
okay but the way that faelor finch writes every song that perfectly fits pennbiel liiike its giving closet fangirl
🧭 waywardwarlock
seriouslyy!! like what else is "give me your unmarked hand / in the shadowfell we won't be a secret" supposed to be about if not pennipher and corabiel
16 Notes
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🌫️ cloudgiant-snailboy Follow
yall please dont fill up the unseen servant tag with your super fucking weird smut posts im just looking for tips on how to find my unseen servant
🪡 scç-writer
the search function on tomeblr does need to be updated but we dont have to kinkshame :)
🌫️ cloudgiant-snailboy Follow
the site is being overrun by virgin degenerates
🍯 treebarkhookhandwagondoor
sounds like you need Wilam the Wizard with Wandering Hands to help you summon the unseen stick in your ass
290 Notes
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🗝️ crypt-princess Follow
so whose going to be the first to commission a painting of that scene with Aliizya and the beholder 👀
🍎 bloodmaledickening Follow
i already asked my local artisan he said he's gotten two other commissions for the same scene lmao
🐁 softbarbarian
girl i commissioned a tapestry
45 Notes
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🕯️ andersfirelight Follow
friendly reminder that devil deals are a real thing that a lot of people fall victim too and that demons are malicious and do destroy peoples lives if theyre not careful so please be careful when consuming works like Hellionfinity which romanticizes devil deals and fiendish soul contracts
🌾entangled-farmer Follow
imo any work of fiction that involves a romance between any type of fiend is not just problematic but harmful
🕯️ andersfirelight Follow
i used to be indifferent to books that had devil romance interests because like thats their whole thing theyre seducing people to get their souls and the mc overcomes it, but reading through the replies i see that Hellionfinity actually ends with the devil character as the main romantic lead which is super problematic in terms of power imbalance and the fact that he has a redemption arc is so out of touch especially since our military is finally recovering from the azgurian assault
🧚🏻‍♂️arms-of-faelor
helliofinity also has a scene where the main character uses a soul coin that an imprisoned mortal gave him and he uses it to bring the devil out of avernus so he doesnt fully die and no one in the book mentions it or talks about how messed up it is to use soul coins and we never see the now bound to hell prisoner ever again
🕯️ andersfirelight Follow
hellionfinity officially cancelled on my end!
88 Notes
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☘️ celest-ial Follow
moment of silence for all the customers waiting on drink orders while the tavern wench gets her back blown out by a new guy every night ✊😔
🦁 king-killa Follow
the gods work hard but Girthy Gladys gets worked harder
57,022 Notes
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🎲 beholdersbeholdingme
paladin and warlock romances are OUT! cleric and necromancer romances are IN!
🪭 royalcoinpurse Follow
the only thing a cleric should do to a necromancer is beat him to death so she can revive him and kill him again
🎲 beholdersbeholdingme
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❇️ arch-dryad Follow
i think we need to analyze why we're so quick to place women in categories of devious seductress or healer in romance novels as if that hasnt been the pervasive trope that holds magic-touched women back in our actual society
🍯 treebarkhookhandwagondoor
why do you assume these fictional tropes are mf couples only? can a gay cleric not beat his gay necromancer boyfriend to death?
🎲 beholdersbeholdingme
and off! beat him off cmon guys
5,275 Notes
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🧀 weremouse Follow
yall ever be talking or whatnot and feel like no one understands you
🪨 sebrenenogdon Follow
ᛄᚠ ᛡᚢ ᚳᚪᚾ ᚱᛁᛞ ᚦᛄᛋ ᛡᚢ ᚺᚪᚠ ᛏᚢ ᚱᛁᛒᛚᚪᚷ ᚦᛄᛋ
🧀 weremouse Follow
say that shit fr (<- looking around clueless)
🪨 sebrenenogdon Follow
ᛋᛁᚱᛁᚪᛋᛚᛁ
60 Notes
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🌠 crownofstars
remember when that person made a call out post for the author of ilairepeler for using a ghost writer and it turned out the author was an actual ghost. writing. like a literal ghost writer. like.
🍄gnomestool Follow
arent you the dwarf that fucked a slaad
🌠 crownofstars
how would you like to become a ghost so you can write more witty comments like this for eternity
301 Notes
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captainfern · 9 months
Note
just read rock bottom (both parts) - it was really good !!on a side note, thank you for making it gn, not many writers do that =]
but after reading part 2 i cant help but think that price knew and was kinda putting on a show for soap ... maybe as a reward after a hard mission he invites soap to help him and reader out, and soap realizes some Things about himself, mainly that he likes both of them -- but thats just my thought, im a sucker for threesomes (all good things come in threes after all lol)
anyway, like i said before, rock bottom is really good !! i love how you wrote it, and especially soap's orgasms - im a sucker for guys who are pathetic and cun in their pants
sorry for the long ask, i just wanted to say my thoughts =D
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Rock Bottom pt. 3
Johnny "Soap" MacTavish x gn!reader x Captain John Price
[“Rock Bottom” by KISS]
[18+]
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• summary - soap thinks he's dreaming when price invites him to make you feel good lol. • rating - 18+ • wordcount - 3.5k • warnings - gn!reader [they/them, 'hole', 'sweetheart', 'love', 'baby' are used], unprotected piv, threesome? idk price doesn't do a lot but it's enough lol, sub!soap, praise, oral [m!receiving], fingering, m!masturbation, a sprinkle of cum play, strong language
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i've changed it up a bit but i hope you like <3
sidenote i fucking LOVE that pic of soap
Late that night, Soap had a knock on his door. He wasn't expecting anyone, so when he checked his watch and it read 23:55, he was confused.
He opened the door, and was shocked to see you standing there. You smiled at him, and Soap swore he almost melted on the spot.
"Hey, Soap. Sorry, did I wake you?" You cocked your head to the side curiously, taking in Soap's unkempt mohawk and pyjama pants.
Soap shook his head. "No, no, was about too, though. Are you alright?"
You nodded, fidgeting with your fingers. You looked up and down the hall, before you leaned in closer. Soap's breath hitched, and he could smell your shampoo. He took a breath.
"Price wants to talk to you," you whispered. "He's in my room."
Soap's stomach sunk. Why would Price want to speak to him while he's in your room? The only logical explanation was that he knew what kind of sick fuck Soap was, listening in on him and you on more than two occasions.
Soap felt his cheeks warm in embarrassment, his spine tingling with nerves.
"Am... I in trouble?" Soap asked, and you gasped, shaking your head.
"No, of course not! Why would you think that?"
"Just wondering..." He trailed off, before he was following you down the hall a couple of metres to your bedroom door.
You opened the door and ushered him inside. Soap heard you close and lock it before you breezed past him and settled on the edge of your bed, a soft smile on your face.
Price leaned against the far wall by the window, a lit cigar in his hand. He exhaled a plume of smoke and it drifted out the open window, the tip of the cigar glowing red. The room was pretty dark, asides from the couple of soft, golden lamps dotted around the room.
Price cast a look over his shoulder at Soap.
"You know why you're here?" Price questioned, and Soap's stomach flipped with nerves.
"Uh... not really, sir."
"I think you do." Price said simply, closing the window and crossing the room with his cigar hanging from his lips. He paused beside your bed, placing a hand on top of your head, petting your hair.
Soap was burning up, and he dropped his gaze. He had been fucking caught, hadn't he?
"You're not in trouble, Soap. I told you that," you said soothingly, leaning into Price's touch. "But we know you listen. Through the wall. At the safe-house."
Soap was mortified. The tips of his ears were burning so hot he imagined there was steam coiling from them. He had his eyes firmly on the ground, looking at his feet. He didn't have the nerve to look up at you and Price.
"It's okay," you concluded. "You don't have to be embarrassed."
"Easier said than done..." Soap grumbled, face and body growing hot. Despite his torso being bare, he felt like he was being suffocated by his skin.
"You like the way they sound, don't you, sergeant?" Price voiced, and that made Soap finally tear his eyes away from the ground. "You have quite the crush, don't you?"
"...yes sir." Soap whispered. There was no point in denying it now. He was far too deep in whatever was going on.
Price hummed, looking down at you as he continued to massage your scalp, smoking his cigar. The smell permeated the room, lingering thick and woody. A light grey haze shimmered in the lamplight, hovering just above Price's head. Soap'd be concerned for his own lungs if he wasn't overcome with a million different emotions right now.
"You can fuck them, Soap." Price said suddenly, dragging his hand to the side of your face, cupping your jaw.
Soap's mouth dropped open. He couldn't help it. He wasn't fucking expecting that.
"I... I mean— not that I don't— it's... you know, it's just— are you sure? I don't—" Soap stuttered.
"It's okay, Soap," you said calmly as Price traced your lips with his thumb. "I want to. If, of course, you want to as well? You don't have to if you feel uncomfortable."
Price slipped his thumb passed your lips, and you snagged it between your teeth before you sucked it lightly. Soap's mouth continued to gape, not quite sure what to do or say.
"So?" Price urged, pushing his thumb deeper into your mouth, cigar hanging loosely from his lips. "You want to fuck them, or no?"
"But... aren't you two... together?"
"I don't mind sharing."
Soap's cock twitched at that. You were still sucking on Price's thumb, but your eyes were on Soap. You battered your lashes at him, and he felt his cock jump again, now semi-hard beneath the thin cotton of his pyjamas.
"Well?" Price prompted. "Last chance. You in?"
Soap was nodding before he got the words out of his mouth. "Y-yeah. Yes, sir. Please, sir."
Price beckoned Soap forward, popping his thumb out of your mouth. With one last pat to your cheek, Price settled at the head of your bed, smoking his cigar against your headboard. Meanwhile, you continued to sit cross-legged near the edge of your bed, smiling up at Soap as he approached.
When Soap's abdomen was parallel with your face, you reached forward and took hold of his pyjama drawstrings. You slowly pulled the bow apart, before you tucked your fingers beneath the waistband. You paused, looking back over your shoulder at Price. Soap realised you were looking for some kind of instruction. That made his cock harden further.
"You want to suck his cock, sweetheart?" Price asked.
You nodded, and Soap released a shaky breath.
"Right. Let him up on the bed."
Soap sat on the edge of the bed and you crawled onto the floor. You skimmed your fingers along his waistband teasingly, enjoying the goosebumps that appeared along the pale flesh. You could see the imprint of his hard cock beneath his pyjamas, and saliva flooded your mouth. You looked up at him, and the way he was looking at you made your stomach draw tight in pleasure.
You pulled his pyjamas down, and he helped by lifting his hips. You slipped it down his thighs just enough for his hard cock to spring out. It was achingly hard already, the tip flushed red and adorned with a single bead of pre-cum that threatened to fall as his cock bobbed against his stomach.
Soap hissed, tossing his head back when you took hold of him. You grasped him tight at the base, leaning forward to drool a string of saliva down his length. He groaned, breathy and desperate, as the saliva dripped down his shaft and collected above your closed fist. You smeared it up and down, pumping him, before you placed a couple of tiny licks to the tip.
His hips stuttered, and a hand shot down to hold your head. His hands weren't as big as Price's, but they sat heavier. Heavier in a way that made your stomach flip as he attempted to guide your mouth further onto his cock. You didn't let him— still placing small licks across the weeping slit, and along the underside of his head. He groaned your name, pressing your head closer, your mouth pushing against the tip of his cock, pre smearing across your lips.
Your other hand reached down to cup his balls, and his hips jolted again. He whined, eyelids drooping as he watched you fist his cock a couple of times. Then, you licked a fat stripe from base to tip, and he moaned loudly, tugging at the roots of your hair. He tasted heady, tainted with salt, as you swirled your tongue around his cockhead once more, before you finally gave in to his desperate pushing and opened your mouth wide.
You sunk your mouth around him, and he released another desperate moan, followed by a whimper when you hollowed your cheeks. He wasn't as lengthy as Price, but he was certainly wider. His cock stretched your mouth taut as you took more of him, and when your lips came into contact with your fist at the base, you gagged.
"Fuck, fuck," Soap groaned, hips twitching to thrust deeper. "S-so good."
Saliva leaked from your mouth as you pulled back, and then took more of him, bobbing your head up and down. His hand in your hair was a stable pressure, encouraging you to take more and more of him. You removed your hand at the base, holding his thigh for stability as his tip dragged across the back of your tongue, edging your throat. You gagged again, and Soap moaned in response.
Behind Soap, Price palmed himself through his trousers. He grunted softly, pressing his hand to the imprint of his hard cock. He puffed on his cigar, intent on not touching himself fully until Soap was fucking you into your bed.
"Mmmfuck, m'gonna come," Soap whimpered, pressing your head closer until your nose pressed to the hair at his pelvis. "M'gonna... fuck..."
"Pull back, sweetheart." Price ordered calmly, and you listened. You pulled your mouth off of Soap's cock with a wet pop, admiring how it glistened with your saliva. Soap groaned, frustrated, trying to push your head back towards his cock.
Price nudged Soap's lower back with his foot. "Don't start, Soap."
Soap stopped with a whimper, looking down at you. He pet your head, massaging your scalp. You kissed his inner thighs, before retracting your hands and getting to your feet.
Your chest was now level with Soap's face. Soap couldn't help but stare when you ripped your shirt off, nipples hardening in the cool air. Soap whined, and you let him lean forward and take one of your nipples into his mouth. You hummed in pleasure, hugging his head as he sucked and skimmed his teeth along your nipple. He switched to the other one as Price tutted behind him.
"Look how desperate he is for you, love," Price grunted, dipping a hand into his own pyjama pants and cupping himself, not fully stroking yet. "Make him beg to fuck you."
You cried out, the sound morphing to a moan as Soap bit at the skin around your nipples, sucking bruised over the indents of his teeth. He pulled away finally, his lips puffy and glossy. You stroked his short hair before taking one hand to the longer strands of his mohawk, tugging it to expose the bare expanse of his throat.
His Adam's apple bobbed as you clambered into his lap and attached your mouth to it, sucking harshly. Soap groaned, the vibrations travelling through your mouth as you peppered bruises up the column of his neck.
"You heard the captain," you teased, sucking a bruise right beneath Soap's ear before you bit down on his earlobe. "Beg for it."
Soap offered absolutely no resistance. He angled his head to look up into your eyes as you pulled away. His eyes were glassy and full of desperation, and it forced an involuntary moan from your throat.
"Please, please, let me fuck you," he begged, hands at your waist, trying to grind you against his lap. "Please, baby, please, I need it, I need it so bad—"
"You need it?" Price chuckled, and Soap's face burned up. "Hear that, sweetheart? He needs it."
"Aww, such a needy boy." You chuckled, placing a kiss to Soap's nose before you slipped off his lap.
You clambered across the bed until you were sat between Price's legs. You lay down, your head on his lap as you lifted your hips and pulled your shorts and underwear down, exposing yourself to Soap. Soap moaned, throwing his own pants away before he was swivelling his body, now sitting between your ankles. He grabbed your shorts and underwear and pulled them the rest of the way down, tossing them across the room.
"Please, please..." Soap whimpered, taking hold of your ankles and rubbing the skin. "Please can I... Please can I fuck you?"
You hummed, running your hands up and down Price's legs, feeling the material of his pyjamas. Price grunted, finally taking his cock out behind your head, gripping it in his hand. He fisted it, stroking a few times before stopping.
"Your choice, love." Price uttered, voice gravelly.
You smiled, biting your lip. "Have you been a good boy, Soap? Do you deserve it?"
Soap nodded desperately, crawling closer until his hands were smoothing against your thighs. "Yes, fuck, I've been a good boy. I'm—" he cut himself off with a whimper. "I'm your good boy. Please."
As Soap whimpered and begged, Price placed his cigar to the side and leaned down, cupping your jaw to angle your mouth to his. He kissed you deeply, tongue probing your mouth. Smoke swirled between the two of you, and you whined into the kiss. It was sloppy and lewd, the sounds downright pornographic. It tasted bitter and sweet all at once and when Price pulled back, he ran his tongue along your bottom lip for good measure.
Soap whimpered, moaning at the sight. He took his cock in his hand, fisting it roughly as you and Price pressed your tongues together. Price pulled back an inch, a thick string of saliva connecting the tips of your tongues. Soap moaned again, pre rolling from his aching tip and down his shaft. He was painfully hard, cock twitching with each movement of his fist.
The string of saliva snapped and Price pulled back completely, picking up his cigar and placing it between his lips, taking a deep inhale. Meanwhile, you looked back at Soap, all desperate and whiney. Butterflies fluttered around your stomach, and your smile grew wider after you licked your lips.
"You're so pretty, Johnny," you whimpered, fingers trailing down your body. "Want you to fill me."
Soap moaned, mouth dropping open. He continued to jerk himself off as you quickly sucked your fingers into your mouth, before you were placing them at your hole. You pushed them in, arching your back, and Soap moaned again.
"Don't they sound so pretty?" Price mumbled, stroking his cock too.
Soap was nodding deliriously, eyes trained on where your fingers fucked your hole. He whimpered, begging silently with his eyes, pupils blown wide.
Price chuckled. "Come on, sweetheart. Give Soap what he wants."
You nodded, removing your fingers and spreading your legs wider, draping them over Price's. Soap wasted no time drawing closer until his cock rested against the plush flesh of your inner thigh. He was breathing deeply, whimpering softly as his cock ached, throbbing with need.
"Fuck me, Johnny." You said, and that was all Soap needed.
Cock wet with your saliva and his pre-cum, he notched the head at your entrance and pushed inside. Slowly, he stretched you open, and you moaned loudly, turning your head into Price's thigh. Price stroked your hair, other hand fucking his cock into his fist. The sounds were loud behind you, making you moan again.
Soap screwed his eyes shut, chewing on the inside of his cheek in focus. He didn't want to bust a fucking nut halfway inside you. Fucking hell.
He pushed in further and further before he bottomed out with a guttural moan of your name. He grabbed your legs and put them around his hips, notching himself deeper with the new angle.
He whimpered. "Fuck, feel's so good, baby. So tight."
You moaned, feeling him deep inside you. Not as deep as Price would normally reach, but deep enough that his tip skimmed somewhere inside you that had your back arching He was thick, stretching your hole open around his girth, making you whine.
"Move, Johnny." You whispered, pleading.
You felt so full.
He obliged, beginning to rut into you like a man starved. He whimpered and whined, one hand kneading your thigh around his waist, the other gripping your hip and pulling you back onto him. His cock slammed into you, fucking your hole in a way that even made Price let out a groan.
"That feel good, love?" He asked, a puff of cigar smoke blowing across your bare body.
"Mhm." You nodded, unable to form a sentence as Soap fucked you.
Price fucked his fist, grunting around the shape of his cigar. The air was hazy around your head— or maybe it was the dizzy pleasure overtaking your brain and the thin ring of tears in your eyes. The noises that both Price and Soap were making made your stomach twist, butterflies coursing through you.
Price grunted, deep and earthy, tasting of smoke. Slick sounds followed as he continued to stroke his cock, his other hand coming to rest on the side of your face, rubbing your cheek with his thumb. A small ember from the tip of his cigar floated down and landed on your cheek. It burned slightly, but Price smoothed it away with his thumb. It made you moan.
Soap meanwhile was the complete opposite. No deep grunts or curses or anything like that. He had been reduced to a whimpering, whining mess. Each time his cock pressed deeper into you, he whimpered softly, often followed by a higher-pitched whine before he was moaning your name like a mantra. His breathing was rapid and uneven as he rutted his cock into your hole.
"Tell them how good you feel, Soap," Price grunted above you, and your eyes rolled as Soap hit a spot inside you that had your hole pulsing around him. Soap moaned breathlessly, now peppering wet kisses along your neck and chest. Price huffed, nudging Soap's leg with his foot. "Tell them, sergeant."
Soap whimpered. "Feels so good, baby, fuck. Such a t-tight hole, all for me."
"Careful..." Price grumbled, but Soap didn't seem to notice. Or maybe he just didn't care.
He had his sole focus on pumping his cock into you. Your body trembled beneath him, legs quivering against his hips. You were moaning softly, his name. Johnny, Johnny. He had been wanting this, craving this, for so fucking long. He could feel his orgasm building, but he wanted you to come first.
"You wanna come?" Soap whispered after sucking a dark splotch onto the base of your throat.
You nodded, chewing your lip as your body began to heat up. Price continued to pet your face, fist speeding up, cigar still hanging loosely from his lips.
"Go on then, baby. Come for me, please." Soap whispered, and you listened— your body spasming, back arching as you came.
Soap moaned loudly at the feeling of your hole squeezing his cock as your orgasm rolled over you. Price moaned too, thrusting up into his hand a couple more times before he came. Hot spurts fell past his fist, splattering your hair and cheek. You whimpered out and, breathing hard, he placed his cigar on the bedside table's ashtray, and smeared his cum across your cheek.
"S’all right, love, there you go." He muttered, admiring the way his seed painted the edges of your hair and the soft dips of your cheek and cheekbone.
Soap watched the exchange and whined deeply, the sound stretched out as his orgasm neared. He fucked into your tight hole with his eyes halfway open, pleasure making it difficult for him to open them fully. But he wanted to see you. See how pretty you looked when he came inside you.
"Fuck," he cursed. "M'gonna come— fuck— gonna come inside you, baby, just— ah, ngh— mmmfuck, baby, 'm gonna—"
"Not inside, MacTavish." Price growled, and this time Soap heard him, he just didn't give a fuck.
Soap shook his head. "M'gonna— please—"
You whimpered. "No, no... please, inside."
Price grit his teeth. "Fucks sake, don't—"
Soap came with a string of whimpers on his lips, your name falling across his tongue in a moan. He pumped you full, stretching your hole around his fat cock and filling you hot. You moaned, hands now running up and down Soap's back.
Soap's body dropped onto yours, cock still inside you, and he nuzzled his face into your neck as his breathing calmed. He gently kissed the skin, and you stroked his back, legs flopping off of his hips and laying either side of him, pressed against Price's.
"Good boy, Soap." You whispered, bringing a hand up to massage the back of his head.
He whined into your neck, and you smiled. Then, you looked up at Price, who was still stroking the side of your face, looking down at you with those pretty dark eyes.
"You 'right, love?" He asked.
You nodded, smiling, barely able to keep your eyes open. "Mhm..."
He patted your cheek gently, before he took a fistful of Soap's mohawk and lifted him from your neck. Both you and Soap gasped, and Price made the Scot look up at him.
"You're on cleaning duties for the next month, Soap," Price said simply. "Listen to me next time."
Soap scoffed, and Price let go of his hair. He immediately buried his face back into the curve of your shoulder, sucking gently on the bare skin.
After a moment, he mumbled: "So, there's going to be a next time?"
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763 notes · View notes
vixensbrainrotts · 3 months
Text
Committed to you - Manjiro >Mikey< Sano
(part two)
Idea/ prompt: Mikey from the last timeline who wants to propose to us but has no idea how to ask so he ask advices from draken and emma
Vixen's two cents: Hi. I know ive been gone for like 2 weeks, I dont know why but it's been hard writing lately. anyway, thanks a million to @anahryal for giving me this idea whilst I was in the pits of my writers block!!! thanks girl, I can't tell you how much this helped. anyway, REQUESTS ARE OPEN and I advise you to use them! now please enjoy my revival piece!
Mikey has thought every possible thought he could have. He had run through every possible situation, every possible outcome, every possible setting, but damnit why was this so hard? He couldn’t do it. Not for the life of him.
He had browsed millions of travel blogs, pondering about every possible spot on earth to take you for the occasion. He had woken in and out of more jewelry stores in the past month than he had ever in his entire life. He had specifically stood in corner stores, reading the wedding catalogues in the magazine section trying to figure out what the hell he was supposed to do.
None of it helped.
Manjiro wanted it so bad. So so very bad. Every white dress he walked by, he envisioned you in it. Every bakery shop he passed, his eyes flitted up and down the fancy display cakes, pondering whether or not it would be good enough. Any time he woke up next to you, every time he joined you in the shower, every time he watched you cook, the urge to sink to one knee overtook him.
He knew he couldn’t make it that simple though. It was too domestic for him, so little of a gesture. He wanted you to know that he loved you, that he would bring you the moon if you wanted it. He needed you to see just how much he appreciates you for sticking with him through everything, and for that he needs a grand gesture.
However it seemed that nothing he could think of was quite big enough, quite meaningful enough, quite heartfelt enough. He was at the end of his wits. For one and a half months- seven weeks he had been fighting this battle alone.
He had made some progress in that time, having picked the ring because when he picked it up he just felt that this was the one. It was a niche store, and he was initially appalled by the average price of the rings, but decided, ah what the fuck? and entered the store for mostly shits and giggles. He was greeted by an expensive looking elderly gentleman who donned a monocle and silk gloves, clearly the clerk, and clearly an expert. He had the longest, most engaging talk with the man, explaining his situation and his frustrations, to which the man nodded understandingly and told of his own story and experience with marigge.
Seven long weeks he had kept it a secret from everyone, and now he couldn’t take it anymore.
He was just about to throw the towel on this whole thing and say fuck it and give up on this whole marriage thing and just accept that he would never make it, when he remembered that he didnt have to be alone in this. Not at all matter of fact. His best friend married his sister after all. If Ken could do it with the pressure of Shinichiro, Izana AND Mikey breathing down his neck, then surely he could do it too, right?
You were out on a girls night with Hinata, Senju and Yuzuha. Emma would have tagged along normally too, but with the addition of a new-born baby, she decided that it would be best to sit out this time. Either way you were out of the house for the night, and Mikey was left to his own devices. You had left him with a kiss and a home-cooked meal (which he felt bad about leaving behind so he completely stuffed himself before coming here) before he gave Ken a quick heads up over the phone that he was coming over with a VERY important problem.
Thats how he found himself here. Standing in the Kitchen of Emma and Ken‘s flat, hands perched on the counter, looking down at the surface, face in a deep frown. „What’s goin on? What’s the problem?“ Ken asks roughly, leaned on the refrigerator as he eyed his friend. Mikey didnt really respond though.
„What problem?“ Emma‘s voice was hushed as she entered through the kitchen door, pulling the door shut behind her, probably for the sake of the baby. „I dont know.“ Ken responded, rubbing his eyebrows „Ask your brother.“ he sighed as he gestured to Mikey who was still staring down the counter.
“Mikey?!” Emma sounded confused and a little concerned as she turned to look at him, eyes flitting between her brother and her husband. “Did you know he was coming over?”
Ken nodded wordlessly. “Said he needs our help about something.” Emma’s head tilted in question but accepted the fact. “What’s up Mikey?” She asked, approaching him and joining Draken at the other side of the counter.
Mikey didn’t say anything though, instead reaching into his pocket and producing a small, black, silk-encased box. He dropped it onto the table and looked up at the couple in desperation. “How do I do it?”
Ken gasped and felt his lips tug into a smile, happy that finally, finally Mikey was wiping you up (he had told him to do so since they were teens).
Emma slapped her hands over her mouth to muffle a silent scream, beginning to voice up and down on excitement as she realized- her brother was marrying you! She thanked the gods that Mikey fell in love with you because there was no better in-law than her Soulsister.
“Ahhhhh! Oh my goodness Mikey! I’m so happy for you! Can I see? Wow! Oh my god Ken are you seeing this!? He’s proposing! Ah I’m so glad!” Mikey nodded in response and let Emma pick up the box and crack it open, revealing the beautiful white-gold wedding band, encrusted with more diamonds than she could count. Notably, one large diamond sat in the middle of the ring, flanked by two smaller diamonds on each side.
“Oh.” Emma breathed. “Ken why didn’t you ask Manjiro for help when picking my ring?” Emma sounded slightly offended as she spoke, glaring down at the ring.
“Nah nah, don’t get it twisted girl. You told me what ring you wanted, I didn’t have much picking liberty other than the price.” Ken waved his hands in dismissal, brushing off her accusations with a grin still wide on his face. He made his way over to Mikey and clapped a hand on his shoulder, congratulating him for the occasion.
“Good on you man! Finally givin it the push, hah?” Ken was smiling as he searched for Mikey’s eyes, but he didn’t look up. “What’s up with the long face? You’re about to propose dude, you should be over the moon!”
Mikey sighed and shook his head. “I’ve been trying to propose to her for months. Months Ken. I can’t do it. It’s never right.”
The couple halted their celebrations and turned to look at Mikey again, Emma putting down the dainty box as her looks turns to one of concern. “What do you mean?” She fingered at the box as she leaned across the counter.
“It’s… i don’t know. Ken made it look so easy when he proposed to you, and Pah-chin was even more mindless about it! I really want to. I really do, but every time I get close, I chicken out because I get scared or because something isn’t right, and I’m starting to think that it’s better if I just… don’t.” Mikey sighed and cradled his head in his hands, his elbows resting on the counter.
Emma and Ken shared a look, a wordless exchange of worry and empathy. "What kind of proposal were you thinking of? Big? Small? Public? Private?" Emma started, hand rubbing soothingly across her brother's back.
"Big." Mikey mumbled into his hands, remaining hunched over the counter. "Big and public. I wanna make sure that everyone knows, everyone sees, I want them all to know. want them to know how much I love her."
Emma's eyes softened and she suppressed a smile, because all in all, it was cute. She had always known her brother to be big and strong, undefeatable, and most of all unwaverable. Mikey always put up the strong front when really, he was hurt. Vulnerability wasn't something that she was used to seeing from him, which made this moment all the more special.
"Do you want to go somewhere with her?" Ken steps in and asks, an idea arising. Mikey only grunts, a noise of agreement sounding through the room. "Do you know what kind of places she likes?" Ken continues.
Mikey's head slowly raises from the position on the table and he stares forward at the refrigerator. "Europe."
Emma and Ken looked at one another again, sensing that they were getting somewhere. "Then take her on Vacation. You both have that long shared break coming up, don't you? Travel through Europe and when it feels right, ask!" Ken said.
"How do I know when it feels right, though? What if it's not the moment?" Mikey asks, still not entirely convinced. "You'll know. I promise you, you'll know. I knew too and I didn't think I had the stuff to ever get married." Ken reassures again, and this time the two share eye contact, and it takes Draken a lot not to tear up.
Draken took a moment in his mind to look at Mikey. He had stuck by his side since they were kids, through thick and thin it's always been the two if them against the world. And now as he looked at Manjiro he no longer saw the unmatchable delinquent he saw ten years ago, but rather a distinguished person with complex thoughts and emotions. He saw a man that felt, a man that cared and a man that loved in front of him, and he couldn't be prouder.
Ken nodded at Mikey, and Mikey nodded back at him. "Yeah. She'll love it! Thanks, I'll do that! Gosh I don't know what id do without you two.."
"Oh, please propose to her in front of the Eifel Tower! Or the Coliseum! Or on some romantic Bridge in Venice!" Emma swooned and held her hands over her chest, hearts in her eyes.
Mikey smiled at her and nodded again. "I'll try and film it if I can."
-
The rest of the evening was spent with the three of them checking about a thousand booking sites, mapping travel routes and destinations, and the occasional cacophony of laughter which led to a grumpy Ryuguji-baby. Manjiro couldn't wait to go with you, he thought as he sat on one of the armchairs, gently running a thumb over the silk box that sat pretty in his hand.
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scekrex · 2 months
Note
YOU ASKED FOR MORE ADAM REQUESTS SO UH HERE I AM
so yk how adam knew angel dust was a pornstar when charlie mentioned his name. uh i have not been able to get that out of my head because he knew him by NAME it wasnt just like he passed by an angel dust billboard cause those are probably fucking everywhere and was like “cool” NO bro looked at it closely enough to know his name by memory— anywaysss what about adam x male reader whos a pornstar cause thats cool dhdkd maybe he sees an ad with the reader on it or something and gets intrigued 😋 anyways have a super silly day
I fucking adore you for that prompt bc the fact that Adam knew Angel by name was/is stuck in my brain too and I've been meaning to write pornstar!male!reader for a while, you simply gave me an actual reason to do so. Also the warmest, cuddliest hugs to @ultimateissuessimp who not only helped me to come up w a plot but also fixed my writers block xoxo to you bro.
Any way you want me, baby, that's the way you got me
pairing: Adam x pornstar!male!reader
warnings: language, smut, sex without consent (it's not Adam guys, chill), mention of sexual abuse, choking (with and without consent), unprotected sex, reader dies (then he ends up in heaven)
note: not beta read bc fuck you I don't have beta readers
Your pimp massaged his temples and sighed, “Stop acting like a fucking picky whore, if you want your fucking money you'll do the job.” You crossed your arms over your chest, you were having none of it.
It had been a couple of years since you started doing what you did, it had been a couple of years since you had dedicated yourself to that fucking asshole who was trying to force you into something that was way outside your comfort zone. So you have learned to stand up for yourself, to say no. And usually that was fine because usually your clients weren't some snobby bitches with an ass full of money. This time your client was exactly that though, and that asshole of boss - at this point you were sure you could call him that - saw the money and nothing but the money. So a ‘no’ wasn't on the table for you this time as it seemed.
“Fuck you, I'm telling ya, I'm not doing that bullshit,” you told the man in front of you. He however simply grabbed your wrist and pulled you in, “You’re gonna drop that fucking attitude of yours right fucking now because you're gonna do it, if you want or not is irrelevant.” You huffed and ripped your arm from his grip, “Fucking fine, but if that whore breaks me it's on you.” At that your boss chuckled deeply as he gave your cheek a light pat, “Good boy.”
So there you were huh? In a room with some asshole you didn't trust the slightest bit.
It didn't take long for the man to not only undress himself but also to basically tear the fabric off your body - quite literally because your shirt was being ripped open and he yanked your pants down hard enough for the stitches to give out on it.
Your mind went blank after that, everything was just a hazy blur as you tried to get it over with. There were cold hands on your body, then you fell, the landing was surprisingly soft.
A scream filled with pain ripped from your throat as the man thrusted in, in, in until he was fully inside of you, no lube, no preparation. A hand was firmly pressed against your mouth and while probably not intended, he also covered your nose leaving you no way to breathe but you took it, what were you supposed to do? Say no? With that hand on your lips? Yeah, pretty impossible. You also doubted that the asshole would care about your wants. It all went down when his other hand wrapped around your throat and squeezed, he didn't even try to ask for consent, he just took what he wanted, maybe needed.
Your hands were on his wrists in an instant, your nails dug into his skin in order to try and push his hands off of you but to no result, he was stronger. And then the hazy blur faded to black.
-
When Adam read the news about his favorite porn actor being killed he was quite furious.
The news articles all stated the same, that some rich bitch had paid for a session with you - an recorded one on top of it - and had choked you to death. And on top of that the manager of you had published the video, hell Adam was even able to see you die at his hands.
The news articles also blamed you for not giving him any signals to stop, Adam thought that was bullshit. He had followed your porn career for a while now, he had seen interviews too, if only two - it wasn't like many people wanted to interview pornstars on a daily base - he knew you had this little rule about consent and therefore he knew you had given the man signals he just tended to ignore them.
“Can you fucking believe it, Lute?” he asked angrily as he held his phone in front of her face, on the tiny screen there was a news article about your death, a picture of your corpse covered by a white sheet was also featured. Lute looked at it briefly, then shrugged, “Who cares? Just another whore that'll end up in hell.” Adam put down his phone and grabbed Lute by her shirt, “Watch your fucking mouth, he wasn't like the rest of those disgusting sluts.” Lute just shot him a weird look and mumbled a quiet, “Whatever, Sir,” as Adam let go of her clothes.
-
When the world around you got bright you were confused, what had happened?
You found yourself in someone's office, the walls were painted white and there were golden accents to make the room seem less stirile. “Where the fuck am I?” you asked, visibly confused as three pairs of eyes stared at you, one of them was a small girl, she looked delighted to see you. Then there was a woman, you figured it must have been her mother or something like that, she offered you a small smile. The last one was the face of a man who seemed to be equally confused as you were at first, but soon his expression softened a little.
“Well look who we have here,” the man spoke and got out of his seat to walk over to you. He wrapped an arm around your shoulders as he shot you a sharp grin.
“Welcome to heaven, Y/N.”
-
It took a good while for you to get used to the afterlife you were expecting, it looked like your beliefs had been with you and that God had decided to put you out of your misery and send you to heaven a little sooner than you had thought. Not that you complained though, the company was better than the people that had surrounded you on earth.
Adam and you had grown to be close friends in no time and soon after your bond had increased so much you had asked the first man out. He had agreed and so the two of you started dating.
He was surprisingly soft with you - was it really surprising though, given that he knew how you had died? No, not really. But it was nice that he accepted your ‘no’ without further questions - sometimes, when he was really into something you said no to, he sat down with you and talked it out, gave you all the options to stop whenever it got too much or you simply didn't like it. Consensual sex without fighting for what you wanted and didn't want was new to you, it wasn't something your former boss or former clients had ever given you.
But that all shattered when Adam requested something that really didn't sit right with you.
“Fuck no,” you exclaimed, and got up from the bed, “No choking, not after-” you cut yourself off, you weren't able to say it out loud, not yet at least, “No.” Adam sighed, he wasn't annoyed or frustrated, he was actually able to understand the situation you were in quite well. “Babes, I’m not gonna hurt you like that bastard did,” he explained himself while also giving you the space you needed, otherwise you'd feel cornered and that was the least thing he wanted you to feel in that moment.
You knew that, in the name of God, you fucking knew Adam wouldn't choke you unconscious and he most importantly wouldn't kill you again by doing so but it felt wrong to let anyone grab you by the throat with the slightest bit of force. “Adam,” you pleaded, your eyes begging him to drop the topic. Adam's body language softened and he patted on the bed, a nonverbal request for you to sit down again. You hesitated for a moment, then you sat down again.
His wing wrapped around you immediately and his arms pulled you to sit on his lap. His chin was resting on your shoulder as he softly spoke, “I’m not asking you to live through a full fucking session, I'm asking you to try it, to let me show you how it's properly done. You can always tell me to stop and I'll be off of you in an instant. I won't ask you to ever try it again if you don't like it.” The brunette's hands rested on your chest, one of them slowly moved upwards to caress your neck and acting out of instincts you leaned into the soft and warm touch of his.
You thought about it. You thought about it for a while and you came to the conclusion that Adam was right. Trying was okay, trying meant you were allowed to hate it. So you hummed in agreement adding a quiet, “Okay.”
-
Soft lips were kissing your throat and you tilted your head upwards to offer Adam more excess. The first man gladly took it as an invitation to leave hickeys on the soft skin of yours which earned him a throaty moan. “Someone’s fucking horny,” Adam grinned and pressed his palm against the slowly growing bulge in your pants. You immediately lifted your hips to chase the friction that was given to you, a deep groan was ringing through Adam's ears, fuck he could listen to the sounds you were making all day. “You’re one to talk,” you breathlessly countered and lifted your knee against Adam's crotch. The taller man's hips stuttered and his wings flapped in excitement at the newfound and unexpected friction. “Oh fuck,” he mumbled against your throat as his fingers clawed at your shoulders and his nails dug into your skin, the pain it caused was different than the pain men had brought you back on earth, the pain Adam was giving to you always felt so deliciously holy and you could drown in it.
You have had sex before with all kinds of men, rude and harsh ones, shy and soft ones, ones that took what they wanted and then left without the slightest thought of satisfying you. But with Adam it was different, Adam always made sure you were feeling as much pleasure as he was experiencing and if he were to get too caught up to jerk you off, he'd blow you afterwards.
Your fingers itched towards the hem of Adam's robe and pulled the soft fabric up until his lower half was exposed. “Get that stupid shit off, it's cockblocking us,” you growled with lust audible in your voice. That was something Adam was quick to do, he was always so eager to get undressed for you, no matter what, no matter when.
Once Adam's robe had hit the floor, your clothes were joining it in no time. Your naked bodies were pressed together, his lips never left your skin long enough for you to actually miss them, they were on you constantly. “Gonna fuck that brain out of your pretty head babes, it'll be all you will be able to think about for the entire week,” the first man whispered in a deep, aroused voice that gave you the most pleasant kind of goosebumps you've ever had and your body shuddered against his lips. “You gotta try real hard for that, you sure you can fuck me that well?” you teased, very much aware that, yes, he was able to do as he had just said, he had proven it before and he'd prove it again. “Watch it, whore,” he grinned up at you and then your nipple disappeared between his lips and another moan tore from your throat to let the first man know what an incredible job he was doing.
Back on earth you had disliked, maybe even hated the term. It was always used as an insult that was supposed to play down what you were doing but when Adam said it, it sounded like the most beautiful thing to achieve, to be called whore by Adam was something you took with pride, something that made your body heat rush to all the right areas.
“Nah,” you replied and even though it was more of a whine than an actual statement, you confidently continued, “You like it when I use my mouth and we both fucking know it.” Adam's wings twitched at the thought of you sucking him off and his eyes revealed that he liked the idea - not for now though, now you two had other plans. “Sure do, babes, sure do,” the brunette agreed as he reached for the bottle of lube that he had placed on the bedside table earlier.
That was also another thing you appreciated about the sex with Adam, while he made sure you were feeling that holy version of pain earth could never compare to, he was also gentle, well as gentle as someone like Adam could be. But he prepared you, always did, and he was the type of guy who'd rather use too much lube than not enough.
At first it had been weird for you that Adam knew about your carrier, in the name of Lord above that motherfucker had seen you die because of that stupid porno. But it turned out to be quite useful for him to have all that knowledge about your past, that way he knew how far he was allowed to go without constantly having to ask you. He did check on your well-being during sex though, a thing you appreciated very much. He also knew about the things you were into, figuring his kinks out was as easy as breathing, the first man did nothing to hide the things that turned him on.
Adam covered his fingers in lube, waited a moment for the liquid to warm up and then slowly started to push his index finger inside of you. Your back arched and your hips rocked down on his finger, taking it like it was a daily thing - maybe because it was. “Gimme the second one,” you breathed out and watched as Adam moved his hand a little, his index finger almost slipped out and you were about to complain but before you had the chance to, two fingers were thrusted inside of you and you groaned, “That’s what I'm talking ‘bout, pretty boy.”
“Just look at the filthy little slut you are,” his hand moved up and down your side before it stilled on your hip bone, “So fucking eager to take the first dick ever made.” You nodded, “And so fucking ready too, so what ya waiting for, big guy?” Your lips had curled up into a shit eating grin as you challenged him, “Scared you'll hurt me?” Oh and that made something inside of Adam snap.
He quickly withdrew his fingers, causing you to complain about the emptiness you were left with. “Adam,” you whined and wiggled your ass closer to his hips, “I can take both, your fingers and your dick.” That earned you a light slap on your hips, “Don’t be so fucking impatient, you'll get what is needed to shut your mouth.” “I think it'll make me open up instead, moaning yo-” you cut yourself off with a loud moan because the brunette had just bottomed out inside of you without any kind of warning. And the burn that came with it from how wide his dick stretched you was beautiful through and through.
“Don’t just fucking talk about moaning my name, do it,” he demanded and gripped your hips firmly to keep you from squirming, he didn't move however, gave you the time you needed to get used to the feeling. Oh the self control this man had was driving you insane. “Goddamn it, fuck me already, what use is it to have the first dick inside of me when it doesn't fucking do shit,” you whined as you threw your head back into the pillows.
Adam didn't move his hips, however he leaned over you and wrapped his left hand around your throat, there was no pressure at all, just the feeling of his hand. For a moment panic flooded your brain and your body screamed at you to make him stop, to tell him not to fucking touch you like that, but then he spoke up and his voice was so soft, sounded so worried, “You decide when it is too much, if this is too much you simply say so and I won't touch you like that again unless you ask for it like a good fucking boy you can be.”
You closed your eyes, took a deep breath and relaxed, his hand was still on your throat but you relaxed. “No, it's okay,” you whispered without looking at him, then added, “Now get to the fucking point and fuck my brains out like you promised.” And then there was pressure on your throat but at the same time the brunette started to move his hips, the pace at which his hips slammed in and out was bruising but it was exactly what you needed. You bared your throat as much as you could, showing him that it was okay, showing him that you trusted him with this, “Fuck, Adam.”
The sound of Adam's balls slapping against your ass filled the room and while one hand was firmly yet not painfully wrapped around your throat, the other slowly slid up your torso until it reached your nipple, the skilful fingers of your lover twisted it in such delicious ways that moan after moan spilled from your lips and Adam admired it, admired you. He was purely enchanted whenever you got vocal during sex - which was quite often.
“Fucking right, whore, moan for me ‘n’ my dick,” he hissed before he caught your lips in a bruising kiss, your back arched off the mattress even more, your hips tried to chase his whenever he pulled out only to slam himself back in again a second later. A whine fell from your lips and seeped into the kiss, your wings closed around his back, trapping the both of you behind feathers but neither of you minded, you were both too caught up in pleasure to care about such things. “Adam, please,” you moaned as your hips helplessly moved in sync with his own, “Fucking touch me.”
Normally Adam would make you beg for it, deny you your orgasm for as long as he could, but not that day. You had been doing so well for him, had tried something that neither of you were sure you would like. You had given him your trust by allowing you to touch in ways no one ever touched you with consent and he wanted to reward you for it, wanted to give you what you so desperately graved. As he attempted to let go of your throat you stopped him. Your hand tightly gripped his wrist in order to keep his hand where it was and you looked him in the eyes as you said, “I fucking dare you to stop choking me, use your other hand to jerk me off.”
He couldn't help the chuckle that rumbled through his body but he did as he was told and once his hand had started to stroke your dick, it only took you a few moments to reach your climax. The white wetness covered your stomach, a few drops even reached Adam's chest but you were too fucked out to pay any mind to it, all that you were able to focus on was Adam, Adam, Adam. Adam, who was fucking you through your orgasm to chase his own, Adam who didn't take much longer to reach his peak, Adam who filled you up with his cum until it started to leak.
The first man breathed heavily on top of you as he pulled out, a weak snap of his fingers cleaned both of your bodies before he fell into the sheets beside you. Well to be fair he had landed on your wing instead of the mattress but you couldn't bring yourself to care. You turned around to face him and curled up against his chest, Adam wrapped his entire body around you in order to keep you warm and protected.
“Thank you, Adam.”
He kissed your head softly.
“Anything for you, babes.”
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urfavskzlvr · 7 months
Note
What do you think it'll be like having both Minho and Jisung as your partners? Like, you guys are in a poly relationship and all
I see them both as heavy switches, but you can interpret them however you want
MINORS DNI (afab reader described)
HFUWRGUIFVGED
EHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEH
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seungminssangel (go read their work, they're a really good writer) wrote about fucking Seungmin while he fucked Felix and (me personally) I THINK THATS MORE MINSUNG CODED. Because both of them would be perfectly fine in any position/order. You wanna be drilled into by Minho while you're slamming into Hannie? DONE. You wanna be messily slammed into by Han while Minho is behind making him messy? CHECK.
They would eat you out at the same time and 🤭🤭. Minho would be fucking you with his tongue while Han focuses on your clit. Inpatient Hannie would be rutting against the bed while sucking on your clit :( Minho constantly tells you how good you taste while Hannie whines and hums in ecstasy. They would pull away to exchange the flavor of you with each other, maybe needy Han leans up and kisses you too while Minho goes back to your leaking pussy.
They both LOVE your tits. Hannie would suck on the right one while Minho flicks his tongue on the left one. Minho would pinch your nipple hard while finger fucking you with the other hand, while Han whines and sucks the other nipple and rubs your clit messily. They both would fuck your tits at the same time. Just the mix of your soft skin and the feeling of their hard cocks against each other has them cumming on your face in moments.
They both beg you to let them fuck you at the same time, either in the same hole or not they would let you choose. After weeks of begging, you finally say yes. You choose for Minho to be in your ass while Han is in your pussy. After lots of praise and prep, you are sandwiched between your two boyfriends. Oh, and they are both standing. Minho is supporting you with his hands spreading your ass for him while your ankles are on Han's shoulder. They both buck into you at different paces and it has your head spinning.
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Ahaha I may have gotten carried away. Thank you for this ask <333
Reblogs, comments, and asks are super appreciated <3 Love you bye
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onlyjaeyun · 16 days
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i’ve been following ur writing for some time now and i do have to agree with that anon who said you did CH dirty. you are a very talented writer so it’s just hard to watch.
you started off CH so strong with the lore and little chapters here and there but as it progressed you kind of just got lazy and it shows. when important events happened in the story, they weren’t conveyed through writing but through the texts (ie the riki and yn fight, that was definitely worth a written chapter) and it was honestly disappointing.
the ending isn’t much to say about either. yn and hoon barely go through development after the letter incident and all of a sudden they’re dating and married with a kid like two chapters later?
idk, if it was a mental health issue then i get that but even then you should’ve just gave it a break and thought everything out more. you could do so much better.
thank you for the feedback!
i wanna put you through the progess of a piece of writing from the POV of a writer okay? now keep in mind: i work two jobs, am a fulltime uni student and the daughter of an immigrant household with two parents who still work most of the day just so you know what else i have to deal with, besides my mental health okay?
now, i started off CH strong right? yes. i uploaded on the daily, fine i chose that. a chapter usually takes me around one hour if i actually sit down and focus on nothing but the chapter itself, which includes IG stories, editing, formatting etc. alright
on top of the daily chapters, i constantly replied to 40+ asks a day, a blessing in disguise because no matter how much i enjoy talking to you guys, the pressure does get worse the bigger that number of my inbox becomes, i hope this makes sense
now, i started CH back in october, right when my semester started, thats why i started off strong but as time went on, my assignments and private life got too busy and i guess i felt entitled enough as a writer to skip a few certain chaps and make life a little easier for me by making them regular chapters instead of written ones.
and this is gonna be my main point: i'm not a machine. i wrote a minimum of 5 THOUSAND words per written chapter, MINIMUM. we're talking about a 5-9 THOUSANDED worded chapter EACH WEEK. which usually took me about 6-7 hours, even allnighters.
yes, i chose to do that and maybe my time management wasn't the best but i had to create a compromise where i wouldnt have let you guys wait for over two months which would have resulted in me losing my motivation completely, and yet still focusing on EXAMS. because you know, i'm a fulltime uni student with TWO jobs 😮‍💨
if YOU think i did CH dirty go write an alternative ending yourself but it should be a minimum of 15 chapters including 5 written ones, with at LEAST 9k words each yeah? i wanna see you manage it all, pls prove me wrong snd show me you're better than me i'm genuinely begging bc it might inspire me to do "better" next time.
as a writer/artist/creator, and i can tell you probably arent one yourself or havent been one for long, the longer smth takes to come to an end the worse the pressure becomes which results in a blockage i dont wish upon my worst enemy i'm being deadass. i dealt with some of the worst writer's block ive had since i started writing literally 12 years ago and you're telling me i should have just "taken a break" and do "better"
i never, ever expected anything from anyone but some of you are so entitled to a writer's time and skill it's giving me a headache. maybe you didn't like the timing and writing of the last few chapters of CH and i guess that's unfortunate but this was so unnecessary because you completely dismissed everything else that could have been going on in my life and even belittled my mental health issues like im some fucking AI writing machine
do better, be nicer, write it yourself if you don't like it i'm so fucking over this
if i had gotten out of my own comfort and wellbeing and have actually written another set of written chapters i would have burned myself completely out. ive been in this fandom for not even a year and have already finished FOUR smaus with 50 chapters each, you do NOT get to tell me what i should or could have done better because you dont even give a fuck about me as a person this is just about receiving what YOU think YOURE entitled to but this is MY art and I will do what I see fit even if it's not what was expected of it because i'm a fucking human being with a life before i'm a writer on tumblr
oh, also: i do this for free ㅤ:) just a reminder :) this is my HOBBY :)
and don't you EVER call me lazy again when it comes to writing because i'm not gonna pour my heart and soul into a fic just for you to call me lazy when i literally wrote 50 THOUSAND words for this fucking fic just for the written chapters
goodbye
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miyaur · 10 months
Note
Hello. This is my first time using an askbox(?) So please forgive any mistakes
How would you see Jing Yuan react with a tired/stressed out female s/o who just started to let go of self care and has been too critical with herself (Physically and Mentally). And also been more recluse even with him?
Can I ask both sfw/nsfw head canon (if this is the right term hehe)
And umm I don't know if I saw correctly in hour masterlist that you have indications of anons. If so can I be ☕Anon?
Thank you so much!
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synopsis. taking care of his stressed female s/o!
warnings. uhh smut at the end i guess cuz nsfw hcs are included!!
author's note. YEAH OFC U CAN BE ☕ ANON!!! oh my god no more writers' block guys guess whos ready to rumblewrite!?!?!?!
pairings: jing yuan x fem!reader
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sfw hcs first whipeee!!!
he won't let that shit slide tbh, like he always tells you to give the best, you should be at your best, and that isn't what you're going through rn.
and if it's srsly to the point you even stop coming to bed, which is usually the case very sadly, he will take matters into his own hands. even if it means he has to take work away from you
like he knows you work hard, and you love your job and stuff, but when you start to prioritize work over yourself? that crosses the line.
and whenever he sees or hears you continuously critiquing yourself, he will tell you you're doing great in 50 different ways.
and while yes, he likes to laze around more rather than working cuz he probably gives all the paperwork to his assistants, he would help you out with your job if you really won't budge
is especially mad when the deadline is weeks away too, like damn calm down its deadline is in 2 weeks
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nsfw hcs AAAA
ok so ive mentioned before he'd be a lowkey bully in bed BUT. but. he would be all about your pleasure if it means you'll stop stressing out, or stop with doing work thats in 2 weeks cuz cmon.. 2 weeks is alot.
or atleast he tries to be somewhat 'gentle', can't help being so big that your tight pussy can't handle yk? just loses himself when he's inside
like whenever he's like fucking you to make you feel good he has to remind himself that he shouldn't be like just doing for his pleasure and sake alone
ANYWAYS. likes to eat you out the most honestly, and especially when you are stressed cuz he KNOWS you love it when he eats you out
and knows you like it when he praises the HELLL out of you
oh and any position where he can see your pretty face reacting to how deep he's inside is just fine w him, just as long as he gets the chance to see you and your cute pussy sure
probably would sit you on his cock while he does your work for you :D!!
probably grunts and groans more than whine and moan, like he's just that kind of man when you stressed as hell yk?!?!!?
just wants to focus on you the entire time of having sex, and always asks if you want more rounds cuz like he doesn't wanna break you like he'd usually do haha
no but srsly he'll try his best to be gentle, every little sound you make counts!!
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quick post again to keep up with my upload sched on here!!!
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dirtyeddietini · 1 year
Text
fics that have altered my brain chemistry (eddies/joe qs version)
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okay so ive been in an adhd brain rot?? where im just fucking HORRIBLE at reblogging fics that i enjoy and honestly it was my whole reasoning behind making this blog FOR GIVING WRITERS THE LOVE THEY DESERVE i just wanted to give a shoutout to these writers (and stories) they’ve made that just fucking messed with my brain (and in a good way okay??) over these last few months. please check them out and give them all the fucking love they deserve
like a poem (FINISHED series, but sometimes if you ask nice enough she will throw a blurb in there) - im so very fucking biased because i love her to the moon and back, but she writes the best fucking stories of joe that will keep you up all night having you rethinking all of your life choices. IT WAS VERY HARD FOR ME to pick out a story that i wanted to highlight in this post, but the whole reason i fell in love with her writing was because of bookstore!joe and he will ALWAYS have a special place in my heart. love you boo
plot: “Joe finds solace in a quaint bookstore, your bookstore, from a hectic situation in the streets. But, you’re closed. But then also, it’s Joseph Quinn.“ from the authors page
echoes (FINISHED, series) - again im so very fucking biased because she is the sweetest person you will have the pleasure of knowing BUT THATS BESIDE THE POINT - she writes so fucking beautifully she will literally have you CRY and this will forever and always be my favourite fic of hers. she deserves all the love she gets, and then even more so read it!!!! (she will make you cry its not on me tho)
plot: “When she laid her emotions out for her best friend, the last thing she expected was for him to turn around, walk away and never speak to her again. Years after, they meet again - different people, different feelings. Or are they?” from the authors page
the hideout (FINISHED, oneshot)- this was one of the first fics i read and fell in love with. it was in that timeperiod where all i could do 24/7 was read eddie munson fanfics and this was one of those fics where i went “holy SHIT??” and honestly i dont think there will ever be a time where this isnt just some % on my mind??
plot: “Eddie Munson made it big. Now, when he returns to Hawkins for a hometown concert with his band, he is reminded of the girl he’s been in love with for the past 6 years when Steve Harrington calls.” from the authors page
vintage reeboks (FINISHED) - this is one of those fics where you’re like???? holy shit i wish i’d come up with that?? i remember reading all of this in one day (summertime, sweating very fucking much) and its just?? holy shit its perfect?? the way eddie is in this??? and its something i could never think of would be this perfect?? i swear i think of this fic at least once a day??
plot: “The gate at the bottom of Lover’s Lake was meant to spit the quartet out in the Upside Down. Steve, Nancy, and Robin were meant to be there. He wasn’t meant to be alone. But when Eddie comes to on the shoreline, you’re there. It’s not the Upside Down. It’s not Lover’s Lake. It’s not 1986.” from the authors page
twenty four hours (STILL GOING) - the way this has me in a chokehold?? im a fucking sucker for when fics have a nice layout??? and this is just so pretty to look at?? like whenever i see its been updated my whole body is SHAKING?? i dont even know what to say?? this is just so amazing and the whole?? will they wont they?? i love them?? i want them both to fight with me all night long??? i CANNOT wait to see where this ends
plot: “in which eddie munson and you absolutely hate each other's guts. what happens when your friends make a bet that you can't spend more than twenty four hours consecutively together?” from the authors page
to know you’re mine (FINISHED) - i saw someone talk about this in the “eddie munson x reader” tag, and DEVOURED the chapters that were up in one whole day?? the way eddie is so fucking soft and nice and the best fucking gentleman in this?? and also?? the relationship to steve in this is amazing??? but THE RELATIONSHIP TO EDDIE IS EVEN MORE AMAZING?? such a fucking fantastic author please go EAT all the chapters right now
plot: “You know the rules. You'd been there when your boyfriend, Steve Harrington, discussed them with the others. There are only two.Number one: Only play when everyone's together. Number two: No finishing inside each other's girls.You'd agreed to these rules, same as Chrissy. Same as Eddie.But then there's rule number three, and though it remains unspoken, it's by far the most important. And you have that feeling again, like when you propped yourself up against the barstool, straining to see him on that stage, craning for a glimpse as his husky voice reached inside you. Now, his dark eyes are doing the same thing: pulling at something buried deep, tugging it into the light where it can't be hidden. And, sure, of course, you didn't intend this. But what are intentions in the face of such things? Needless to say, every rule gets broken.” from the authors page
the customer’s always right (STILL GOING) - hehhehe im a hoe for cutie virgin eddie??? but they way she always manages to capture eddie in her fics?? fucking amazing??? and her writing??? yes PLEASE so do yourself a favor on this fine friday AND READ THIS AMAZING FUCKING SERIES because eddie will make you fall in love in this???
plot: “eddie munson is a virgin and doesn’t want anyone to know (because being an adult who’s never fucked anyone is a total reputation ruiner). but you, his favorite customer, are more than willing to change that.” from the authors page
sincerely yours... (STILL GOING) - like i’ve told her before - her eddie is fucking amazing and so very much to the point!! im so excited for this one and cannot WAIT to see where eddies teasing will make him end up!! the last fucking part of this??? amazing
plot: "Untouchable, is what he called you. Dating Jason, the captain of the basketball tea, most would call you the same. Living your holier than thour life, something else he said, you can’t seem to swallow the need to prove him wrong” from the authors page
burn one (FINISHED) - this is just the perfect fucking combination of smutty and sweet??? like this is just how i imagine eddie and this is so fucking sweet and perfect?? had me thinking about this for WEEKS UGH
plot: "When you move to Hawkins to start over, your new unexpected friendship with your weed dealer next door is your saving grace. It was never your intention to fall in love with him though.” from the authors page
Disjointed (STILL GOING) - this fic has me feeling ALL the feels in all the chapters?? makes me GIGGLE, makes me CRY!!!, i’m in love with all the chapters and i CANNOT WAIT to see them live happily every after
also now that i’ve finished, i’ve just realised this is a lovepoem to my favourite authors on this app heheheh im sorry but i DO love you guys. please do go and read their stories, and send them all the fucking love in the world!! they do have so many amazing stories on their masterlist you will not be able to sleep tonight!!!
authors mentioned in this post THAT YOU NEED TO CHECK OUT!!: @icallhimjoey @ghostinthebackofyourhead​ @inknopewetrust @storiesbyrhi​ @ghost-proofbaby​ @blue-mossbird @lovebugism​ @plumxwrites​ @loveshotzz​ @boomhauer
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definitelynotshouting · 4 months
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Ask game #25?
mcytblr writer ask game
25.) What works and/or authors in the fandom do you recommend?
OH MAN..... GODS OKAY well this is about to become me gushing about my friends, but i think everyone and their mother should be reading @raichett, @droidofmay, @good-chimes, @sillyfairygarden, @sisyphean-writes, @renardroi's writing. Like holy shit i know some incredible authors. Grim in particular went and fully changed my brain chemistry with his fic Total Apogee of the Heart, which i do believe i described to him as "like reading an oil painting," and "like you've taken an axe to my chest and deftly split it down the middle to show me the inner workings of my heart," which is truly the palest of terms i can use to describe something that ended up feeling so soul-shocking to me /pos. The skillful way he twists words to layer these rich, saturated themes into his stories makes me INSAAAAAAANE, its pretty much the epitome of how i want to write when it comes to thematic elements and imbuing my narratives with symbolism. I genuinely dont know how to describe it, but the way he crafts sentences and weaves in references to other media is like reading a fairytale, and it leaves me feeling like ive just resurfaced from a dream every time.
And, ofc, my very good and dear friend Raichett with their ACP-verse-- oh my gods what an incredible read. Reincarnation fic with modern minecraft worldbuilding FUCKING SIGN ME UP..... i think this might be my favorite fic in the fandom because truly you can just feel the heart-wrench of how long Grian has been waiting, of all those words left unsaid during his and Scar's initial conversation that we the reader happen to be privy to. AND THE SEQUEL!!! THEE SEQUELLLLL THE ONGOING SEQUEL RAAAAAAAHH okay im normal im normal im normal <- lying. It just manages to hit every fucking trope i love all at once so i start frothing at the mouth whenever it gets updated or they send me snippets. I could read Raichett's writing for hours and hours and just feel so warm within it, truly beautiful prose and characterization :]
And ohhhh Sisyphean my beloved..... if you havent been reading their anonymous scarian fic series then please please do so, especially Bread and Butterflies, a fic they gifted me that made me simultaneously want to cry and also curl up into for the rest of my life. Something about the atmosphere in their fics, along with the juxtaposition of their unique form of humor, really just knocks it out of the park for me. And, of course, the gut-wrenching wing scene-- trust me, you need to read this fic. The reveal is so incredibly well done that it feels like a gauze being lifted from your eyes so you can finally see more than the lurking silhouette of what's been hinted at. Beautiful fic and evocative writing, i dont feel like i can do it justice you're just gonna have to go read it for yourself >:]
Sorry i told you this was gonna be me gushing so i am going to gush can we talk about Droid's fucking fics please. Can we talk about those. I've always been captivated by their writing, worldbuilding, and the way they so deftly weave implications into their prose to present a fic that feels so neatly-woven it practically breathes. Every work i've ever read from them, regardless of fandom, is some of the most engaging writing ive ever read before. Not to promo a fic inspired by hunger au, but im especially enamoured with their gift will the curse be reversed if you say it backwards. Reading that was like getting kicked in the chest a billion times until it ached, and the way they portrayed the two Grian's dynamics brought me perilously close to tears multiple times while reading, which is admittedly very hard to do. Also i think reading that fic is the closest ive ever gotten to what yall experience whenever i upload a new hunger au chapter-- i stg the dread i felt as the fic progressed had me HOLLERING in their dms like "IS THIS WHAT THATS LIKE. OH MY GODS" truly just a phenomenal fic all around
Thello, oh Thello, my beloved friend, her fic you are here to risk your heart had ME heartbroken in the best of ways when i first read it, and every reread since has only solidified it as a stunning cross-section into 3L!scarian's dynamic. Thello's writing in general is always so deeply elegant and refined-- reading it feels a lot like shoving the world's richest, gooiest, most delicately-layered cake into my mouth to melt on my tongue. She just gets intimacy in a way i rarely see done, highlighting the fragile way people can come together while straining to stay apart. Her writing is so deeply, utterly human in the details she chooses to focus on, and that level of groundedness paired with her fantastical prose makes me feel like what im reading is both very real and also the whisps of a beautiful, colourful dream.
And, last but very much not least, my wonderful friend Telk. Telk's writing is so utterly unique, bursting at the seams with both humor and a quiet rawness that punches me right in the ribs every single fucking time. They're also so deeply, insanely skilled at being able to say so so much in a story while dancing around the actual core of it, drawing you into understanding whats really going on below the surface like an event horizon. Their fic A Certain Je Ne Sais What is, in my mind, a particularly good example of the subtle and skillful way they weave implications into their work-- im perpetually in awe of how meticulously they poured Grian's cognitive dissonance between how he really feels about Scar, and how he wants to feel about Scar, into the narrative. That, and their characterization is genuinely flawless, im not sure ive ever read better character voices that capture the inherent humor of their owners than in Telk's writing.
Gods i have so much more to say about so many more of my friends and their fics but i'll stop here otherwise i will never shut up. Local guy loves his friends so fucking much i will shout it to the sky any chance i can take<3
And as a bonus, here's the hermit/trafficshipping collection i run on ao3, affectionately nicknamed The Body Count!! Its chock-full of incredible authors and writing, all of whom are my close friends, and its recently expanded to contain 60+ fics!! 60+!!!! INSANE. MY FRIENDS ARE INSANE AND I LOVE THEM PLEASE GO READ AND COMMENT ON THEIR WORKS BC THEY DESERVE THE ATTENTION :] THANKS FOR THE ASK AAAAAAAAAA OKAY BYE ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
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sluckythewizard · 12 days
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BUT IM NOT A WRITER. something strange possessed me to write my first proper fanfic in maybe a decade. be niceys to me but also grill me so i can get stronger. this one is a stupidly self indulgent bit between Soda and Emizel, a day or so after emizel was sired. CW for gore descriptions, but thats about it i think. image below is a snippet of the start. the rest of the whole dang thing will be under the cut. ive never posted fanfic ever in my life. read my tags for secret behind da scenes commentary
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"Oh shit… I think hes dead…" It was another night, another patrol, another fight, and another win, for Emizel and Soda.
Under moonlight, under street light, under interwoven wires above, the two stood here in a quiet and damp alleyway. The air was drenched with the smell of a previous rain, and the puddles of said storm remain huddled in corners and pot holes.
One splashed as soda found himself stepping forwards into one. The residual adrenaline of the fight had left his body shaking, his heart still pounding, his wounds still throbbing. They had still won; or more-so, Emizel had won. A particularly nasty blow to the side had Soda reduced to the side lines for most of the fight, left to watch as his newly vampiric comrade had absolutely eviscerated the competition.
Emizel had only been turned a day ago, but it was impossible not to notice how it had changed him. He already acted so goddamn confident, so on top of the world, and this newfound power, newfound speed and strength, only built upon his insane ego.
The Fangs that they encountered here on this night stood no fucking chance. Emizel was too quick, too strong, and he easily chased off the rivals. It was only now, as the final unfortunate opponent had turned to flee, a clean clock in the jaw sent the human tumbling to the ground with a dull thump, and it did not move afterward.
Soda shifts his shoe out of the puddle, the cold seeping into his sock being one of the few things keeping his mind in his body in the moment. Is the guy breathing?
A low laugh bleeds from Emizel as he stretches his arms, licking his sharpened teeth as he stares off in the direction the remaining Fangs went. Soda knew that look on his face, the look of a tiger pondering on its next kill, he knew well that Emizel wanted to chase them.
But the guy on the ground.. It was one punch to the face, and the wicked crack sound that came from it had planted a seeding dread within Sodas chest.
As he steps forward, around the puddle, the resulting sound made Emizels attention click back over to Soda, the snap of his gaze making Soda flinch.
The two lock eyes, and Soda weakly gestures to the limp body on the floor. "The uh.. I think.. Is that guy dead?" He finally asks, having a hard time keeping contact with Emizels intensely red eyes.
Emizel turns his attention to said body, tilting his head as he goes to kick at the thing, turning it over. "Man no way hes dead, I punched him once." He mutters.
"Well, yeah, but his head almost twisted all the way around when you did.." Soda steps up to stand beside Emizel, the two boys standing with their hands in their pockets, down at this unfortunate, limp body.
"Should we hide it?" Soda asks, glancing back over at Emizel, who had.. An odd look on his face. He was clearly pondering something, but Soda could only guess whatever was going on in that brilliant head of his. He knew and trusted that Emizel was smart. If anyone could figure out what to do about this, it would be him.
But the lack of an answer had anxiety chewing at the back of Sodas rib cage, and after a second, he speaks up again, compelled to fill what he perceived as a tense silence. "Like.. I dunno, I've never uh... killed a guy..." He shrugs, prompting Emizel to let out a big sigh.
"He's not dead man, just out fuckin cold." Emizel kneels down next to the body, putting an ear up to its chest, and pondering on that for a moment. An uncertainty twists his expression, as he decides to instead place a hand on the victims throat, checking for a pulse. A moment passes, and seemingly finding nothing, he pulls back.
"Uh... Okay, so he might be dead."
Something about the confirmation from Emizel made a shiver run up Sodas spine. That, or maybe it was just the breeze agitating the cold water in his shoe.
"Huh… Damn.." Was all that Soda could really get to leave his mouth. Which was hardly a splash compared to the torrent that was slowly churning in his head. They just killed a guy. Or, Emizel just killed a guy. And it was so easy. They had to hide the body now, right? That was the usual progression here? Getting caught for murder was way more extreme than getting caught for breaking mailboxes with soda cans. It was so, so disturbingly easy. It really was just one punch. It's not like the Fangs are weak by any means, so just one punch? And this guy is dead? Forever?
Or, perhaps by human means, their rivals were fairly tough. But Emizel was on a whole other level. No mortal could stand up to him now...
"Hey, are you okay?"
The question had pulled Soda back from his head, his gaze flicking back over to Emizel, who was looking up at him with those eerie, piercing red eyes. Soda felt another shiver.
"Uh, ieah man, I'm all good." Soda nods, swallowing down whatever anxiety was bubbling up in his throat.
But Emizel didn't seem satisfied by his answer, standing back up and staring down his human comrade. Soda couldn't meet his eyes, his gaze instead traveling downward, and pausing on Emizels red, cut-up shirt. There was something off about the color, the way it seemed darker in some spots, brighter in others.. Wait, wasn't Emizel wearing a white shirt before all this?
The vampire boy seems to pick up on Sodas expression, following his eyes down to his shirt. "Oh, yeah! While you were on the floor, the knife guy got me a little" He says, a stupidly simple smile on his face. Soda was about to let out a laugh at how unbothered his friend seemed by it, but it gets caught in his throat when Emizel goes to pull his shirt up.
The sound of the bloodied fabric peeling away from skin made Sodas own skin crawl, but that wasn't nearly as bad as the sight of the intense gash running from his collar bone, down to his stomach.
"Oh, fuck dude!" Soda gasps, but Emizel laughs it off. Even despite knowing Emizel well, Soda was still surprised by just how much Emizel could shrug off. "Shit, doesn't that hurt, dude?"
"Oh yeah this fucking hurts!" he says with a laugh, his smile big and toothy and proud as he presents this egregious wound. Swollen and angry, pulsing with a slow heartbeat, and still oozing with thick, dark blood.
The sight of the split flesh, and the glints of bone beneath the dark, dark red all tugged at Sodas gag reflex, and yet he couldn't pull his eyes away. So Emizel's just been walking and talking so normally this whole time with his chest just cleaved wide open? Soda felt just as impressed as he felt horrified.
It wasn't until Emizel reaches down to poke at the abhorrent wound that Soda snaps out of it. Watching his friend press his fingers into the bloodied flesh, and slowly pulling it apart, allowing more ichor to seep from the gash, it was too much to watch at this point.
Soda reaches up to put a hand on Emizels wrist, the vampire boy stopping, and looking up at his friend.
Soda found himself freezing again when he locks eyes with Emizel. He was going to say something now, right? "U-uhm.." Is all he really chokes out, giving Emizels wrist a gentle tug. "D-do you. Uh. I suppose a hospital Isn't a place you can go anymore..?"
Emizel just smirks at that, letting Soda pull his hand away from the wound. "Oh, yeah no, but it's fine. I mean, I don't think it's gonna kill me" He shrugs. It was so, so impressive just how unphased Emizel was by all this. Fuck he's actually so cool.
"Well yeah man but it's like, still a bleeding hole. Like you're soaked in blood dude, I'm pretty sure that even a vampire needs that stuff on like, the inside." Soda rubs the back of his head, still unnerved by the sight of it all. "Vampires have like, super healing, don't they?"
"Oh yeah like, regeneration powers. I know I heal faster sometimes but I dunno how to just, activate it on command.." Emizel hums, his eyes narrowing down at his own injury, as if trying to will it into mending. Soda looks away, unable to watch that vile gash ooze any longer.
"I dunno man, how do they do it in like, video games?" Soda tosses the question out, trying to click together some sort of solution in his own head.
"Uhhh.. Huh, video games.." Emizel repeats to himself, chewing on the thought while idly poking at the laceration; until an idea audibly flickers to life in his head. "Oh, I just gotta refill my blood meter. Or whatever."
"Oooh yeah, blood meter!" Soda perks up, "Of course, see this is why you're the brains, man" Soda smiles, glancing back over to his cool friend, but immediately needing to look away again when the sight of that egregious gash tugs bile back into his throat.
While Soda averts his eyes, Emizels eyes wander back over to the body, and that classic 'Emizel has a bad idea' smile creeps across his face.
"Well, if this guys dead, I'm sure he's not gonna need all that blood.." He grins, kneeling down next to the body again.
The word 'wait' had hardly gotten the chance to crawl from Sodas mouth, before Emizel lifts up the arm of the unfortunate body, pulling the sleeve back, and immediately sinking his teeth into the exposed wrist.
The sound and the sight of blood gushing around Emizels teeth made Soda cringe, his hand impulsively coming up to aide his own wrist. An empathetic phantom pain made his wrist ache, his imagination simulating the feeling of shark teeth cutting into skin, sinking deep into the flesh, and clacking against bone. That was a lot of blood, that was streaming down the arm of this fodder.
A low growl bleeds from Emizel as he adjusts his teeth, cutting into more flesh, opening the wound further, and allowing a pulsing torrent of red to stream down his chin, onto his coat. It was an annoying thing, to clean blood out of clothing. Most of the Demons deemed it easier to just let the stains remain. But the night that Emizels throat was torn open, and liters upon liters were granted freedom from his human form, the unbelievable mess had practically changed half the color of Emizels iconic coat.
That was the first time Soda had ever seen that much blood from one person. And well. This would probably be the second.
The sight was unnerving, but it was impossible to look away. The alley was quiet, save for the distant bustle of a distant city, which made the noisy squish and squelch of teeth gnawing on flesh all the more apparent and nauseating.
Emizel had become a monster for sure, and watching it feed on something was… thrilling, in a way. It reminded Soda of feeding a pet spider, or lizard. A mouse for a snake.
It's a heavy thing to witness, the end of a human life. The fear of death is a primal thing, and Soda was no different from any other living thing. He figured everyone else feared death just as much as he does. Well, maybe except for Emizel, of course.
It made sense. Emizel was such a cocky and noisy kind of guy, but hes always had the power to back it up. Even when he lost, or seemed at his lowest, Soda still saw this sort of fire in him, one that Soda admired.
Of course Emizel would be the one to become something like a vampire. Something that Soda had always figured was just a fantasy creature thing. He wondered; if vampires were real, what else was real? Werewolves? Zombies? Unicorns? Are there real demons? Like from hell? Is hell real? Is he going to hell?
The sudden ttteeeeaaaaarrrr of flesh rips soda from his wandering thoughts. Emizel was tugging his head away from the arm of his kill, his teeth clamped down into the chewed meat, and pulling it apart. Soda had seldom seen so much of the inside of a human arm, and the sight of spilling threads and squirming veins was hardly something he ever wanted to stomach again.
"Oh fuck, dude, hey-" Soda steps forward, raising a hand, but the way Emizel snaps his head back over to him, twisting to an unnatural degree, Soda cant help jolting back.
Reddened teeth glint menacingly in the low light, a threatening growl thundering from its clenched, dripping jaws. Emizels eyes were focused, yet wild, glowing with whatever light they could reflect.
Sodas eyes were wide, and his body was frozen in the thick, electric tension within the air. It was like staring down an angry dog.. Suddenly a light bulb in his head flickers to life. It was kind of like an angry dog, right? One hunched over a meal it didn't want to give up. Memories of old encounters and unfortunate dog bites resurface in Sodas head, and with that experience, and with those lessons learned, he gathers the courage to react.
He shuts his eyes, keeping them closed for a few seconds, as he slowly pulls back his arm, and slowly steps back. It was an eye contact thing, wasn't it? Eye contact makes dogs angry, right? That was how you dealt with an angry dog? As he pulls back, and takes in a breath for composure, he finally dares to peek at the angry vampire before him again.
Its snarling had died down, but its eyes were still trained intently on Soda. After a tense, and agonizingly, slow pause... It blinks back, lowering its head back down to its meal, but keeping its anxious stare on this potential threat.
A relieved sigh falls from soda as the tension finally melts. He didnt realize he was holding in so much of his breath. "O-okay, man.. It's yours, you uh.. Earned it.." Soda mutters, stepping back further, until he was standing in a sufficiently dry enough space to sit down in. Now that he wasn't standing, he was finally taking into mind just how much his hands were shaking.
It's odd. Soda couldn't really describe this feeling thrumming in his chest as something like fear.. Nausea? For sure. Disturbed and rattled? Oh absolutely. This was certainly a sight he would have a hard time scrubbing from his eyelids when he sleeps tonight. But he wasn't scared. The memory of the night that Emizel was sired still coated the inside of his mind like an unwashable film. Even in that moment, when the unnatural teeth from the unnatural maw of an unnatural thing hovered over his throat, he couldn't say with confidence that he was scared.
Emizel really is his best friend in the world. And he knows with his whole heart that Emizel feels the same. He knew and trusted that his best friend would never hurt him. Not too badly at least. He loves Emizel, and would give anything to support him.
Like a mouse to a snake.
This really is an incredible power that his comrade had come across, and Soda especially felt a sort of pride in his friend. He felt it was worth it to help him feed it.
The bile in his throat had made its point, and Soda agreed, that watching someone die, and get torn apart and drained might be too much for him. Despite how much he hated the Fangs, the end of any human life seemed like such a jarring thing. To have such an intense fear finally get confronted. Would he go to hell?
Maybe he couldn't just feed people to his friend. So an alternative could be donated blood, right? Soda wouldn't mind giving up something like blood. His body makes it for free, after all. Maybe some other Demons would agree to give up some blood too. But they shouldn't have to take on such a burden. Soda wouldn't mind being the only one. The only one. The only one.
His hand comes up to rub at his neck, as his imagination conjures up what it might feel like to have teeth sink into his flesh. He's been stabbed before, is that sort of what it would feel like? Would he have to get stitches? He didn't really want to get stitches, so maybe there could be a more effective way to get the blood out of him. And there was so much vital stuff in his neck too. There's' a vein that's safe to cut into somewhere, right? He would have to look that up later.
A STARTLING RINGING;
Splits the moment,
Prompting both Soda and Emizel to jolt in shock,
As the phone in Emizels pocket rings away.
Acting as if nothing abnormal had taken place, Emizel pulls out his phone, and answers it.
"Heyy, Johnny! Yeah we chased em off, I don't think those bastards will be infesting this street again anytime soon. Yeah, ieah we'll be heading back soon. Oh fuck yeah dude, save us some!"
Emizel covers the speaker of his Nokia, turning back to Soda with a big smile on his violently bloodied face. "They got some pizza waiting for us back home, dude!" he whispers out to him.
Soda does his best to crack a smile, and to suppress the look of unease that probably stained his face, as he stares at the literal murder scene that's been splattered about in front of him.
"Oh, yeah, hell yeah man.." He swallows down the bile again. "What kind of uh.. Soda did they get?"
Emizel ponders that, before turning back to the phone to ask Sodas question.
"Sprite and a big pack of that one strawberry mountain dew" Emizel tosses the answer back over to Soda, who gives a nod, and thumbs up.
Mountain dew is so neat, Soda really liked all the wacky flavors those guys come up with. The thought of going home and opening a can of soda was certainly a comfort. After witnessing all this blood and gore and viscera, Soda absolutely needed to get back home and get a nice cold glass of something bright red .
As Sodas mind wanders off to soda, Emizel wraps up the conversation on the phone, before hanging up, and standing up.
The movement had pulled Sodas mind back into the moment, enough for him to timidly voice a concern he's had since the start of this debacle.
"Uh, hey, so.. The body, should we… Uh.." He gestures vaguely to it, and Emizel grants it a nonchalant glance.
"Eh, I can toss it into a dumpster or something, I dunno. I'm sure its fine. I'll handle it."
The vampire boy goes to pick up the corpse, the wound in its mangled arm no longer even dripping with blood, the flesh pale from the absolute absence of red in its veins.
"Go ahead and meet me by that one mailbox, the one with the bullet hole in it." Emizel casually instructs, tossing the drained body over his shoulder. "I'll catch up."
"Uh, yeah, okay.." Soda musters up a nod, and the strength to rise back up to his feet, wincing as that bruise on his side makes itself loudly known again. He still felt anxious, but even despite it all, he knew he could trust Emizel to take care of things. He always does. "Just stay safe man, I'll see you there." Soda assures with a smile, and Emizel matches it, tossing him a wink. And then suddenly- -He's gone! If Soda had blinked he would've missed it, but he was fortunate enough to just barely catch the glimpse of Emizel darting off at an inhuman speed, probably looking for a place to dump the body. Right, he would take care of it. Emizel always makes sure his crew is taken care of. Well... Guess all that's left for Soda is for him to walk back to that meeting spot. He looks around the alley for a moment, taking in the sight of that enormous pool of blood in the middle of the concrete. Or whatever the floor of this alley is made from. He ponders on the present moment a little longer than he meant to, the shock of it all leaving him aimless for just a few, soothing moments of just, decompression. The night is quiet, vast, and cold, but the stresses of just the past 5 hours had left his body radiating with fiery aches and pains, so the chill of the occasional clawing breeze was welcomed. Except for when said breeze agitated the cold water still soaked into his sock. He should step in another puddle on his way back to even it out. The smell of rain still rested heavy in the air, heralding another storm on the horizon. There was that, and then, well, there was also the blood. The stench of it felt far too intense to just ignore it, the metallic miasma making itself maliciously unmistakable. Maybe the impending storm will wash this mess away... He looked forward to putting this unfortunate night behind him. With one last rattled, but deep breath, he stuffs his hands in his pockets, and turns away, strolling back over to the mailbox that Emizel had described.
He couldn't wait to get home and drink some soda with his friends.
#NO TAGS ON THIS ONE BC WELL. IM SHY. IM TAKING A BIG LEAP JUST BY ALLOWING U TO REBLOG THIS. IF IT BREAKS CONTAINMENT THATS UR FAULT.#i unfortunately suffer from the disease of 'i hate everything i write the day after i write it' BUT IM GETTING TREATED#I WILL NOT BE HAUNTED BY THIS WEAKNESS FOREVER. AND HEY LOOK THIS IS THE FIRST ACTUAL FIC BIT IVE EVER FINISHED..#ITS SOMETHING TO BE PROUD OF!! AND BY JOBE I WILL BE PROUD EVEN IF I HATE IT.#i dont always need to be the one who likes my art bc i know Someone out there will always enjoy it.#and to that someone i say: omg thankyou i LOOOOVEE YOUUUUUU!!!!!#JUST DELETED A WHOLE RAMBLE I JUST HAD ABT NERVOUS DISCLAIMERS FOR MY ART BUT I DONT NEED EM!!#GET CONFIDENT GET CONFIDENT GET CONFIDENT. ANYWAY. so emizel and soda huh#THEYRE SO CUTE TOGEEHTERRRR TEEHEHEHEHEEEE they are the homies that kiss eachother goodnight like CMON#but uhh so hey your bestest friend in da world just got turned into a freaky creature thing that eats ppl#ieah yknowthe guy that u care about alot that u had to watch get bled out by another freaky creature thing in an alleyway#yeaaah and you were super hurt and weak and stupid and u couldnt do jack nor shit to help him#what was i talking about again. RIGHT so hes even cooler now bc he cant die n hes super strong n his arms can be knives. sometimes.#but also he can eat people now. and sometimes he cant stop himself from eating people. and thats kinda scary. but in a cool way.#but also in a disturbing way. but also in an interesting way?but also in a freaky way.the feelings ARE MIXED!!!ATLEAST I THINK THEY WOULD B#okay again i havnt listened to the suckening ina bit. so its been a minute since i absorbed their personalities. i could be misreading or#misremembering or misconstruing or mischaracterizing or WHATEVER. i think the confusion carries its intended effect#LOSING MY TRAIN O THOUGHT. anyway i love soda n emizel i hope they get locked in a saw trap together or somethign. for enrichment.#TALOS GRANT ME THE STRENGHT TO POST MY CREATIONS ON LINE!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUGHHH!!!!!!!
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hms-no-fun · 10 months
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Currently struggling a lot with getting very excited about a project, writing a lot, editing that writing until it's way more polished than what I can come up with off the cuff, and then being too intimidated to add to the document anymore since the previous good writing still gives off this looming intimidation if that makes sense? The more I write the greater the fear is I'll crash the story into a ditch that reveals the premise can't work. have you had that "its not all coming together shit theres a snag thats really important that i missed" moment? I realize it's pretty inevitable for that to happen, but whenever I write myself out of a moment like that I always second guess that I'm still overlooking something important or taking the easy way out. I know it's probably just all about pushing through but I worry that by pushing im just further diluting the original spirit of the project? Sorry for the all over the place ask, hope you have a good day :3
this is always a tough situation to navigate as a writer. happens to me often, and it has taken me a very long time to come even remotely close to being able to deal with it productively. believe it or not, i actually have quite a lot to say about this, so prepare for that below the break.
first of all, no, it's absolutely NOT all about pushing through. i find "pushing through" can just as often make the problem worse. keep in mind that i can only speak to my own experience and process, so any advice i might give here should only be taken insofar as you personally find it useful.
this is a form of writer's block. there are many different types of blocks, each with their own causes and hypothetical treatments. a big part of becoming A Writer as such is learning the difference between them, and developing methods for dealing with them on a case by case basis that don't involve substance abuse. don't do cocaine. that's step one.
most of my blocks are in the vein you describe. i'll be writing a scene that feels good, until i cross a threshold somewhere and suddenly the whole thing feels dead in the water. the first thing i do when this happens is stop writing. it's hard to stop when you're on a roll, i know. life is short and it's hard enough to write even on a good day, but sometimes you can just tell that you're on the wrong track and at that point you're probably not gonna be able to write your way back on.
once stopped, i check the basics. have i eaten recently? am i hydrated? have i taken my medications? these are rarely my problem (i keep a big water bottle with me at all times and my gf makes sure i'm fed), though you never know how useful a snack break can be. most of the time if the problem isn't with the text, it's that i've been writing for too fucking long and i need to clock out. learning to clock out is SO hard. but as i've been getting into the habit these last couple months, while i generally write less per day i ultimately end up writing more over time. i can feel my brain cooking when i've been writing too long. it's a muscle like anything else. if you did a bunch of overtime shifts at a more physical job, you'd need time to recover too. your body isn't a machine, your brain isn't a computer, and living things are inconsistent. it sucks but you'll have a better time all around when you learn to work with your body instead of against it.
another question is, have i showered recently? i find showers tedious and boring. also i still have depression even though my life is a lot better than it used to be. i lived on my own for a very long time as a deeply closeted self-hating trans woman, so my hygiene habits are not always up to sniff. as much as i hate to admit it, showers help. i can't tell you how many times i've sat at a godfeels chapter or video script and just felt fucking miserable, only to come back forty minutes later from a shower, full of creative energy. i despise self-help shit. just not a fan of the culture of positive attitude wellness check stuff because you can't self examine your way out of your class position. sometimes the problem is that you're broke. sometimes life fucking sucks and you just don't have the art in you, and that's okay. there's a common misconception that if something bad happens to you, at least you can make an art to get through it. but in my experience it's actually a lot harder to make art about bad times when you're still in them. most of the time it takes months if not years of safety and recovery before you can really face it head on artistically. so like, be nice to yourself. it's not your fault that you live in a society.
but also sometimes literally you just need a shower or to eat some leftovers or to go to fucking bed. i hate it every time that is true because i want my problems to be real and philosophical and not just some dumb body thing that happens to everyone. alas, no one can escape the quotidian obligations of simple mortality.
THAT SAID! this stuff isn't usually my problem, and often i find that what's solving the problem when i do step away to eat/drink/shower isn't even the specific activity, but the act of stepping away at all. getting my mind off it for a sec. when i hit a block that doesn't feel completely insurmountable, i like to back away from my computer and pace around a bit. then i'll stare at my big whiteboard with a marker in hand and just let my mind wander. i don't even write anything half the time! but the mere act of trying to compartmentalize the problem into something brief enough for shorthand helps me spot the pain points.
one of my favorite books is Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, which despite what you might assume from its title is NOT a self-help book but instead a work of philosophy from 1974 taking the form of a travelogue. what Robert Pirsig explores in this book is what he calls the Metaphysics of Quality. basically he's trying to understand the split-second judgments we make of things we like and things we don't. i absolutely do not have time to go into the specifics, just know that his Quality refers to the abstract certainty you have when something is Good or Right or Correct or Qualitatively True. like how you pull your hand away unconsciously when you touch a hot stove, but for ideas. you just Know.
a scene that really sticks with me from that book (probably the most famous scene) is when Pirsig describes needing to fix a mechanical problem with his motorcycle only to be stopped dead in his tracks by a stripped screw keeping him from removing the engine cover. he talks about being so focused on the obvious solution to the primary complex problem that, on encountering a smaller, simpler problem that has to be dealt with first, he finds himself completely stuck, calling this "a zero of consciousness." it's a problem so annoying and minuscule and stubbornly unsolvable that you just want to hit the thing with a wrench and throw it in a river. addressing this new problem, this block, requires an adjustment in thinking. and here i'm going to quote a pretty lengthy passage, but don't worry, i'm typing it out by hand with the book in front of me so there's no time saved on my end:
Consider, for a change, that this is a moment to be not feared but cultivated. If your mind is truly, profoundly stuck, then you may be much better off than when it was loaded with ideas. The solution to the problem often at first seems unimportant or undesirable, but the state of stuckness allows it, in time, to assume its true importance. It seemed small because your previous rigid evaluation which led to the stuckness made it small. But now consider the fact that no matter how hard you try to hang on to it, this stuckness is bound to disappear. Your mind will naturally and freely move toward a solution. Unless you are a real master at staying stuck you can't prevent this. The fear of stuckness is needless because the longer you stay stuck the more you see the Quality-reality that gets you unstuck every time. What's really been getting you stuck is the running from the stuckness [. . .] Stuckness shouldn't be avoided. It's the psychic predecessor of all real understanding. An egoless acceptance of stuckness is a key to an understanding of all Quality, in mechanical work as in other endeavors. It's this understanding of Quality as revealed by stuckness which so often makes self-taught mechanics so superior to institute-trained men who have learned how to handle everything except a new situation. Normally screws are so cheap and small and simple you think of them as unimportant. But now, as your Quality awareness becomes stronger, you realize that this one, individual, particular screw is neither cheap nor small nor unimportant. Right now this screw is worth exactly the selling price of the whole motorcycle, because the motorcycle is actually valueless until you get the screw out. With this re-evaluation of the screw comes a willingness to expand your knowledge of it. [. . .] What your actual solution is is unimportant as long as it has Quality. Thoughts about the screw as combined rigidness and adhesiveness and about its special helical interlock might lead naturally to solutions of impaction and use of solvents. That is one kind of Quality track. Another track may be to go to the library and look through a catalog of mechanic's tools, in which you might come across a screw extractor that would do the job. Or to call a friend who knows something about mechanical work. Or just to drill the screw out, or just burn it out with a torch. Or you might just, as a result of your meditative attention to the screw, come up with some new way of extracting it that has never been thought of before that beats all the rest and is patentable and makes you a millionaire five years from now. There's no predicting what's on that Quality track. The solutions all are simple-- after you have arrived at them. But they're simple only when you know already what they are.
this is, in brief, my entire creative philosophy when it comes to writer's block. i share such a lengthy passage because i think it's useful to underline that we're not talking about a problem that is necessarily unique to the labor of writing. this process is a human process. it's just that with writing, the nature of the block itself is often much more difficult to identify than a stripped screw.
there's a couple things i do to try to identify what's got me stuck. a lot of times what happens is that everything in a scene felt good until it didn't, and then everything after that moment fell flat. so i'll go back and read the whole thing and just try to feel the scene. is everyone in character? is their dialogue too quippy, or too aggressive, too expository? are we in the midst of a conversation that has simply gone on way too fucking long? i know it can be torturous to reread your own stuff but idk what else to say except get used to it. especially when you're still early in the drafting phase! like if you know you're not gonna release this thing imminently, there's no reason to be precious about the stuff that's good or to beat yourself up over the stuff that's bad. i know that compulsion to try to Get Everything Right The First Time is strong, but it's completely unsustainable.
sometimes the block is that i just don't feel like writing narration. i've always sucked at grounding a scene with descriptions of the place. lately i'm trying to get away from relying solely on descriptions of staging/blocking, but it's hard for a bitch like me who mostly prefers writing dialogue. i've gotten a lot more comfortable with putting notes between dialogue exchanges like [character moves, looks at picture, has a dramatic thought, other character fiddles with object]. it can feel like cheating sometimes but it's not. there's no such thing. no one will know the route you took to get to the end. they will only see what you show them, when you decide to show it to them.
sometimes the block is in some minor or major betrayal of the story's spirit. the (Terezi) & Jade scene i talked about in this ask is a good example. i hit a point where nothing was working anymore. no one would talk to me. the light was gone. i can always tell when i made the wrong choice. it's such a particular sensation. as though i'm walking and i realize i no longer recognize the road i'm on and must've made a wrong turn somewhere. the solution to this particular block is introspection, retracing my steps, because the wrong turn isn't always obvious. maybe it's that someone in the scene is being too mean, or that i've failed to accomplish what the scene exists to do in some way, or that someone's made an uncharacteristic choice that now everyone in the scene is arguing about and it's like, man, this is taking too long, i'm not enjoying this anymore.
another example from A1 is the second half of the solo. i'd had most of the jasprose scene, the karkat-calliope-roxy scenes, and the vrisrezi-jade scenes written since i posted the A1 chorus. where i ran into trouble was that i needed to get jane, jake, and (terezi) to show up. my original plan was to have them arrive one by one, thus allowing their individual dramas a moment in the spotlight before being subsumed into the group. not a bad idea in theory but in practice it was fucking tedious. here we have a bunch of characters already immersed in the scene captured by the intrigue of Jade being enigmatic, and then some unawares jagoff wanders in and suddenly everyone has to stop what they're doing and be like "hey hello how are you what's up" and then they explain how they got there and then they ask what's up and it's such a DRAG. honestly i would say the majority of my creative blocks by volume are moments when the story really wants me to just cut to black for a smoke break and come back when somebody gets mad enough to throw a punch. i mean that's the the development of A1 in a nutshell. originally everyone was gonna start the track locked up in space-jail on the hopebringer, jade would show up all apologetic and say what she expects padua's deliberation to be, then the whole cast would see her throw a fit over a decision she knew was coming, they'd all be absolved of guilt and let free, then they'd all argue about who's staying or going with Jade in the morning, they'd split up to go pack their stuff and then...
well that was exactly the problem. i wanted to get all the pertinent things out of the way. jade's code switching, voidthought, some EWL teases. give the whole cast a chance to react to it. i thought that would be expedient, because it got the Plot out of the way and gave time to characters for Feelings. if that version of the scene had come at the end of chapter 8, it might have worked. but i realized that as soon as jade's audience was no longer captive, i had no fucking clue what to do with them anymore. we already knew who would go with jade, so acting like that's some kind of mystery is just lame. i started writing A1 from a place of desiring informational density & a quick pace, because we've got places to go and things to do. but if the real purpose of A1 is to explore why these characters choose to go with Jade, then that needed to be done with a lot more care and precision. that's when i decided to let Jade spend two days underground making the earth right again, so that she has to come to everyone individually rather than the other way around. and it muddies her motivations, if you don't mind the pun. it puts her at an appropriate remove from the others. i ultimately wound up conveying all the same information as in the original version, but i did it in a way that was more appropriate thematically and artistically. it wound up being longer road than i anticipated, but this is a long story and in this case the longer road was better for the journey.
take the chapter where Jade visits Roxy. i needed some time with Roxy alone to set the scene, since she's the first person Jade decides to visit and i like writing about the insides of trailer homes. i wanted to get some politics from Jane in this chapter, so hey, why not throw in a televised speech? oh, and then i can have some tucker carlson types remind us that Earth C is a fucking mess. i wrote all that, and it was good, but it was just Roxy watching tv. i tried to get into Jade's arrival and couldn't. so i went back and realized, oh, Roxy should be yelling at the tv the whole time! now we get Jane's politics, Roxy's reactions to those politics, as well as bits and pieces of context re: Jane's relationships with Karkat and Roxy. now when Jade arrives, we can play with the question of whether she heard the speech from outside Roxy's door, and why neither of them was physically at the speech in the first place. there's tension and imbalance in Roxy's state of mind when Jade does arrive, so we're more inside her perspective than we usually are, which in turn helps us identify with her when Jade starts infodumping about antimemes.
so often for me, working through a block is a matter of doing a better job utilizing what's available to you. going back to the A1 solo and trying to bring Jake, Jane, and (Terezi) into the scene. i finally returned to it after a couple months of being sick and dealing with life problems. i was frustrated because i'd hoped to be several tracks in to 3.2 by now, and instead i was confronted with just how much more of this thing is left and how long that might take if i couldn't pick up the pace. this thing NEEDED to get done.
and then i remembered that Jasprose is literally right there.
and that was it! problem fucking solved! i had jasprose drop all three of them into the scene completely unceremoniously using manic teleportation through a fenestrated plane, and from there the entire rest of the chapter erupted out of me in a single go. it's such an obvious solution to the problem that you as reader probably assumed it was the plan from the very beginning. but it's like Pirsig says: the solutions all are obvious-- after you've arrived at them.
then there's the problem of overwriting. i actually did i think four different versions of the opening to the A1 solo. the first person narration was a late addition. i tweaked that scene so so so many times. it kept feeling close but not quite. when i did the thing where i reread to find where the block happened, instead of actually reading the thing i just kept finding spots where i could write more. i can extend this anecdote. this line could be better. maybe a comma here would work better than an ellipsis...
this can be good because sometimes what's blocking you is that you skipped over something that needed more time. maybe some information or a dramatic emphasis that gives the stuff you can't yet write the momentum it needs to get going again. but i've gotta be real careful doing this, because i can do it forever. and then, as you describe (hey look, i'm actually talking about your specific problem now!), that hyper-polished section sets everything else up to fail by comparison.
i think the trick is knowing the difference between when a scene needs an editing pass vs when a scene just straight up isn't working. when it's not working, sometimes you do just have to throw it all out and start over. but if it's good enough that you feel like all it's missing is better dialogue and some more description, then you can hold off on that polish until the rest of the thing is done. this conundrum is most common at the beginning of a chapter or story in my experience, precisely as a result of the process i've been describing this whole time. when you hit a block and retrace your steps, you can always find things to fix. so it's sort of natural that any given chapter becomes less polished the further along you get in to it. that's why it's so important to understand the differences between all these different types of blocks, and to remind yourself that literally nothing you've written is finished until the moment you've made it public.
a big part of getting the A1 solo out the door was me swallowing my desire for perfection in every exchange and saying, no, this is good enough. it's not 100% what i want, but it's close enough that it just isn't worth the effort it would take to get there. sometimes there are scenes that are worth that effort, but they are always rarer than you think and they're never the ones you'd expect. i will freely admit that there are a lot of characters expositing their motivations in this chapter. i tried to embed as much of that in humor or drama as i could, but sometimes you just have to shrug your shoulders and walk away and hope your readers will be nice to you.
of course the funny thing is, once i finished the chapter and had all the panels sketched out and wiped my hands clean of the whole affair, janet needed two weeks to make the images. so i ended up having time to polish up a couple of those things that i felt were lacking after all. but those additions were radically small and intuitive, because i'd divorced myself from the raw production and had committed to so many directions that i *couldn't* change much. i'm so used to writing for release that i don't know what to do with myself when my part of the job is done before i can kick it out the door. i've come to find that waiting, taking breaks, walking away and coming back, do wonders for your ability to egolessly examine your work and identify what's wrong. sometimes you just need a day or two to sleep on it.
and sometimes you realize that you've really just over-written a scene, out of preciousness or insecurity or whatever else, and the result is so much bigger than everything else you want to do that it's more expedient to just scrap it. i hate when this happens, man. i did this with an early version of the A1 chorus, when Jade is stuck in space alone and shouting about how unfair her life has been. you know sometimes there's an emotion in a scene that's addictive. some bit of pathos that you just feel down to your bones, fuck me man, this is so GOOD, this is so JUICY, this shit has QUALITY. it's so good you don't want it to be finished. so you keep writing it, and writing it, and you rewrite it, and you add to it, because you really want to squeeze every drop of emotion you can from the thing. and then you wind up with a bloated melodramatic mess that's so overplayed you've annihilated everything that compelled you to write it in the first place.
i want to be clear that this isn't wasted work. nothing you ever put to the page, no matter how ultimately useless it might prove to be, is wasted work. the way i see this whole process, top to bottom, is that there's this thing. i don't know what it is, but it's there. maybe it starts with an image, or a line of dialogue, or a relationship, or a natural vista, whatever. it can be anything. what matters is it's a sign pointing you in a direction. it's something that has Quality that you can feel with such potent immediacy that you have no choice but to write it. the act of writing is something of an expedition, because the real magic of it comes when those disparate signs start colliding with one another. an image becomes a scene, a house, a world, a universe. sometimes these signs lead to dead ends, but with experience you learn to tell the dead ends from the rough patches. you learn how to make your own way. you do this by listening to what this thing is telling you. every story i've ever written has known better than me what it wants. i can impose so much onto it, i control 90% of the process at least. but that other 10% cannot, should not be quantified or controlled but simply understood. if you try to bottle the flame, you'll just end up snuffing it out.
no artist really knows why they do what they do or how they're able to pull it off. they can tell you their methods, their process, their coping mechanisms, they can write ludicrously lengthy diatribes on tumblr in response to an innocuous ask, but you can't pin down the soul of the thing. Quality is ephemeral, because it's first. it happens before you've had time to think, like putting your hand on a hot stove. you just know. and you have to trust that knowledge to carry you forward, not second guess it too much, not try to wrangle the thing into a shape it doesn't want to assume. sometimes this requires writing scenes that you don't love, because it's easier to build a messy bridge between the moments that drive you than it is to perfect every single moment out of an artificial commitment to like, Being A Good Writer or whatever.
a lot of this is just practice. you get better at communicating with your creative impulses. but also i think it helps to internalize that nobody sees the rough drafts, nobody sees the duct tape. and nobody knows the perfect vision you'll be convinced you failed to meet. nobody has ever made a perfect thing, and no one ever will. who wants to be perfect, anyway? godfeels wouldn't be what it is if i wasn't willing to let it be messy. if i'd tried to do it better, it never would have gotten done, and nothing i'm doing now would have even conceptually gotten to exist.
also, it's okay to abandon shit when it stops feeling good. i have so many unfinished books kicking around from my 20s, dude. i feel bad about some of them, but ten years not finishing books is still ten years spent writing. it's actually quite rare for good ideas to result in finished works, because good ideas are cheap and they're not all for you. but you gotta keep trying anyway because sooner or later you'll catch a spark that has real gas, and if you've done the work you'll be ready for it. it'll feel like destiny. it'll feel like magic, how matched that idea is to your skill level. but it won't be magic, it'll be skill. if you hadn't put the work in to know how to follow that intuition, it'd be just as dead an end as everything else you never finished. you do the work so that when you get lucky you can take advantage of it. so in that context, writing is quite low stakes. if it's not good enough, fuck it, try something else!
anyway i hope there's some decent insight buried in here somewhere. thanks for such a good question!
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kumezyzo · 2 months
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OKOK I JUST READ YOUR GAMER!GF SAPNAP AND THE END GAVE ME AN IDEA AND IM SO SHOCKED THAT NO ONE ELSE (to my knowledge) HAS SAID ANYTHING HELLO?????
therefore im begging asking for you to please write sapnapxstreamer!reader where they have a joint onlyfans and post anonymously with no face. You can maybe do like a bit about how they started and then like explaining different videos and pictures they have. Im feral for this
i realize this is more of how it got started than what they actually do... i hope that's okay 😭😭 and yeah, no one else really cared about that last hc, which I thought would be more of a big deal 😭😭
anyway, enjoy! or dont :) m.list
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you're onlyfans started with bf!sap jokingly suggesting it. and as much of a joke as it was, you couldn't stop thinking about it.
"shit, we should make an onlyfans with this," he said, panting after coming down from his high. he laughed at the end, rubbing at your stomach softly as you looked onto his phone.
it made you feel more throbbing between your thighs. you could hear your moans in the background and his panting from behind the camera. the wet slaps of your hips and the squelching of your pussy was so erotic. you couldn't imagine what people would say if they saw how you two fucked.
"okay, lets get you cleaned up, peach," he said with a sigh, getting up to go to the bathroom.
but that stayed in your head. and you found yourself getting worked up thinking about actually posting something.
when you mentioned it again to bf!sap, it was during one of those moments you got yourself all worked up.
"hey, baby," he whispered to you when you came into his office and kissed him softly. he had completely forgotten about the stream highlights he was editing. "how. are. you?"
you smiled at how he had his hands low on your hips now. "i have a question.."
"mhm," he hummed, rubbing his nose on yours.
"you know how we make those videos when we have sex?" you asked sheepishly as he kissed down your neck. he hummed again and you started to think he wasnt paying attention. "you talked about... making an onlyfans last time.."
he stopped mid kiss and slowly pulled away from you. your face started to heat up. his face slowly turned up into a smirk. "yeah, i remember. what about it?"
you sighed, "would you maybe..."
"uhuh," he teased, kissing at your collarbone now.
"want to actually-" you cut yourself off with a moan when he kneeded your ass harshly. "do it?"
"fuck yeah..." he was really horny btw.
that was your first film session. as bf!sap likes to call it. he got you onto the luvsac in the corner of his room he was sure no one had seen and fucked you from behind. he made sure to keep your head out of it and tried to minimize the sound he was making. his voice would be more recognizable than yours.
you and bf!sap usually recorded yourselves having sex, but it was hard to post videos when he would usually get your face in it. you have to remember, he recorded these for himself and he loved to see your pretty and horny face. to bad everyone else can't.
bf!sap will have you bent over. riding him. riding his thigh. in a bathroom. in the shower. on the floor. fingering you in his gaming chair. fucking you while you try to play valo. all the clichés.
but that's only for after you start gaining more followers. and people start requesting things. and god, you two didn't mean for it to gain so much traction.
and then you saw yourselves on a twitter porn account.
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ignore the ending. fr. its ass. and im sorry i disappeared. i hit a writers block and i lowkey felt weird writing for the dream team cause of shit thats been brought up. but im treating these people as seperate characters now. anyway. thanks for reading 🥰 -Nony
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megamindsecretlair · 3 months
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Get To Know Me Tag Game
Thank you for the tag @nerdieforpedro 😚 for anyone who cares, here's a bit about me! 🥹
General rule: I may overshare in dms and authors notes sometimes but Im generally a private person 🤣 to the point Ive lost friends over it. ive been working with my coworkers for 3 years and they dont know shit about me 🤣 I juss really love yall and feel safe with yall so here we go!
1. Were you named after anyone?
No. My mom didnt want our names to announce who we were on applications so we all got regular smegular names. My name is of Irish origin so my yt folks customer service voice got ppl thinkin I have red hair. I mean....technically yes but its buried under my braids 🤣
2. When was the last time you cried?
At the end of The Marvels. The first end credit had me in real, actual tears. On a more serious note, I last cried before my grandma died. Yall, its fn hard being a caretaker. I was not built Ford Tuff.
3. Do you have kids?
*ahem* 🗣🗣 fuck no! 🤣🤣🤣 I dont even have nieces or nephews. Kids make me nervous and Im pretty sure they can smell the fear on me. 🤣
4. What sports do you play/ have you played?
I played basketball and softball in HS. I love and miss softball all the time even though my big behind HATES running.
5. Do you use sarcasm?
Sarcasm is one of my love languages. I put that shit on everything 🤣 Physical Touch is my main one since we sharing.
6. What is the first thing you notice about people?
Ooof, tough. Depends. Some quirk like glasses, lisp, moles. How they walk/talk, the way they laugh. I am a lurker by trade. Overly shy kid and writer by nature will do that to ya.
7. What is your eye color?
Dark brown. When that sun hits 🫠🫠🫦
8. Scary movies or happy endings?
I am a HUGE scaredy cat. I dont do scary movies nothin! Happy endings over here! 🤸🏽‍♀️ I will enjoy a thriller but only behind my hands and mostly starring Matthew Lillard.
9. Any talents?
.....no? I have a bunch of useless knowledge or trivia that no one asked for but ya gonna get 🤣 . Juss realized writing is considered a talent 😭 so that too 🤣
10. Where were you born?
US, West Coast baybeee
11. What are your hobbies?
Obvs, writing. Reading, sewing, cons, tarot, tv, listening to music, video games (xbox, switch, PC girlie) , Marvel. Marvel is a hobby. I will talk your ear off. That is both a threat and a promise 😚
12. Do you have any pets?
I have two gorgeous Boston Terriers who run me into the ground every day. Idk why my mom thought two was okay 🫠🫠 my Black ass tide 🥲 👏🏽
13. How tall are you?
Fun sized 5'3 and a half 👏🏽👏🏽🤣 pear shaped. I got ass for days but in the itty bitty titty committee. 😭😭😭😭😭
14. Favorite subject in high school?
Definitely English. My English teacher was so fine 🥲🥲 thats not WHY it was my fave but can ya blame me 😩 I loved reading the books but I hated the themes they shoved down our throats. What if that wasnt MY interpretation of the book??? Hmmm? Some faves include: Their Eyes Were Watching God (Teacake 🥵🥵🥵), Brave New World, Bright Lights Big City (probably where my love of second person is from) , Bronx Masquerade, and The Outsiders. And FUCK the Great Gatsby. If I hear about that damn green light one 👏🏽 mo 👏🏽 fn 👏🏽 time 👏🏽😩😡 and FUCK Of Mice and Men, he aint have to do all that in the end. And DOUBLE FUCK I Know Why the Caged Bird sings. Turned my stomach when she described the SA. Lemme stop 🥴
15. Dream Job?
Writer. I will publish, I will be successful, and I will live the life I want. I claim it 😩 on my Octavia Butler, NK Jemisin, Danielle Allen shit 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Whew! That was fun 😭🤣
No pressure tags: @mybonafidefeelings @bratzmaraj @braverthanthenewworld @multiversefanfics @chaos-4baby @westside-rot @saturn-rings-writes @notapradagurl7 @wide-nose-and-wonderful @blowmymbackout @blackerthings @harmshake @targaryenvampireslayer and who wants to do one. I love learning bout my moots.
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bunnywan · 7 months
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what’s the a/b/o to misogyny pipeline???
(i want to start by saying i dont think all a/b/o is misogynistic. i don't think most of it is written with misogynistic intent, either.)
also: ive written an abo fic. right after i wrote though i started getting exposed to the misogyny thing by my obikin writer friends and (despite my fic being alpha/alpha and avoiding what i think the most glaring issues are), ive contemplated deleting it, but these same friends have talked me off it. im going to try to rewrite some parts in the future tho, since there are parts that i look back and wince at. but, im growing and learning everyday, like everyone else. well. maybe not everyone lol.
in omegaverse there is a submissive biological class. hopefully i dont have to explain to you that in omegaverse, omegas (the submissive biological class) are "woman coded" (for lack of a better way to put it ig), and alphas are "man coded." heres some of the most common omegan "traits" that are pretty much universally accepted: able to bear children, self lubricating hole, heat (time of the month, anyone?), emotional neediness, physical weakness (compared to alphas), desire to please alphas, instinct to obey alphas. heres some of the most common alpha "traits": ability to breed omegas, stronger than omegas, dominant personalities, instincts to protect omegas, sometimes uncontrollable sexual urges when exposed to an omega.
so we're already in misogynistic stereotype territory. dystopian, even. "wouldnt it be great if women omegas literally were wired to submit to men alphas!" its gender roles with biological backing.
a common trope in omegaverse fics is omegas "thinking" they "dont want it" (to be a stereotypical omega/listen to alphas/have sex with alphas), and then hey! in some cases, the right alpha comes along and the omega learns that they were wrong all along and submitting to being a baby making hole that likes to be ordered around is actually wonderful! (like when you tell someone you dont really want to have kids and they say "youll change your mind", because what else are you gonna do with your life? youre a baby making hole.) in other cases: an omega might not figure out their purpose until mid rape -- and their tiny omega brain and helpless body cannot resist giving in and enjoying their own sexual assault because that's what their body is for (getting fucked by an alpha).
you see how this is fucking weird? sit back and think about the term "bitching" for a minute and decide if you think thats patriarchal or not.
again, i don't think every a/b/o fic and author is misogynistic, but the world itself it built on misogyny so ... its hard to separate it completely. and its a very convenient avenue for projection by authors, whether it be intentional or not.
this was just what came out of my brain in one sitting, but i think its gets the baseline of the point across. feel free to message me or send another ask if you wanna talk about it more!
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