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azulasmommyissues · 6 months

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ATLA sexuality headcanons, part 1, Aang's era:

aang

-unlabelled or pansexual, also incredibly gnc. he/they methinks

-he never questioned it, he never thought about it. the air nomads were chill with everything, so he was too.

-he simply loves people, and he loves them deeply. he's the sort of person who says "i love you" very fast. and he doesn't have a specific type, either. he simply connects with people.

-he definitely had a bit of a thing for kuzon back in the day. kuzon taught him all the fire nation dances he knows, and bumi cheered them on.

-he also kinda digged teo, the mechanist's son, but by that point he already had his heart set on katara.

-as for girls, he DID like on-ji. in different circumstances, they would might have dated for a short while. but with katara it was love at first sight. the sort that makes you giddy and stupid.

-he's a lot worse at rizzing up katara because he is just THAT into her and he keeps fumbling

katara

-growing up, she never really questioned it. she knew she definitely liked boys and never had feelings for another girl.

-she's certainly fully cisgender. happily says “she/her/hers” when asked for her pronouns

-on the contrary, she was somewhat attracted to haru and jet both—and might've even considered zuko in different circumstances. like she definitely felt something akin to attraction in the crossroads of destiny.

-she fell in love with aang, because he gave her hope, he gave her joy, he gave her balance. she already felt SOMETHING in the cave of two lovers, but she was deeply confused and her feelings didn't clear until after the war.

-she always thought of herself as straight but said that, if she had the chance, she would be willing to kiss a girl—as an experiment. she just sort of always admired pretty girls, in the sense of "do i wanna BE her or DATE her,"

-and she's really passionate about feminism, obviously

-she always prefers getting compliments from other women because "they're worth mOre"

-eventually she meets jiang who's such a butch lesbian and questions EVERYTHING

-is that a girl? is that a boy? idk but why are they kinda...

-niyok and nutha both give homoerotic friendship vibes with her (all comic specific characters have the combined personality of one person hence why I'm including both)

-since she was dating aang she didn't explore her sexuality, but she discussed it with him and he supported her

-she considered identifying as bi but didn't feel like she qualified, since she'd never actually dated a girl. aang told her it's okay eifher way.

-at the end she decides to keep it all behind closed doors as per water tribe tradition. she's happy with aang, some girls are hot, it's nobody's business but her own.

-i also completely fw the reading of her as a straight cis girl, but you know

sokka

-bisexual, female lean, and maybe even poly.

-he fell for yue, he fell for suki. he definitely found like, ty lee attractive, but he didn't LIKE her. He was involved with suki, and they hadn't had any conversation about the exact status of their relationship so he wasn't about to fumble it.

-suki and him are both bi. and if yue were alive they'd BOTH be dating her. at the same time.

-zuko was sokka's bi awakening. seeing zuko and suki run around in the boiling rock absolutely changed his brain chemistry.

-he had a hard time accepting it, because of how the water tribes roll. he had a preconceived notion of manhood that he obviously had to challenge alongside his initial sexism.

-but then he realised that 1) his dad had been in a secret poly relationship with kya and bato, and then with bato and malina-- 2) his grandma had a fling with hama--3) master piandao and jeong jeongwere a thing--and 4) his girlfriend herself, suki, was bi. so bro had nothing to worry about.

-his identity became clear to him with suki's and his father's help. unlike katara, he was a bit more open and public with it. being poly, him and suki had many opportunities to explore it, always respecting each other's boundaries.

-sometimes suki does his makeup and he grows to enjoy it. he experiments with gender expression until he becomes totally chill with it.

-big part of his character is learning that he doesn't have to be a “man” in the way that patriarchy imposed on him his whole life

-so like, cisn't

toph

-toph has crushes on boys: sokka, zuko, the duke, satoru, sun, kanto. but i think non of them are really legit.

-toph would also flirt with girls, like, yaling

-had a 'not like other girls' phase

-she/they/he vibes, has a very complicated relationship with gender

-because she was made fun off by other girls as a child, it was harder for her to blend in and talk with them

-she was also raised sheltered within the walls of aristocracy which contributed to her not thinking about it

-she avoided commitment and serious relationships like the plague

-so she's unlabelled and perhaps in the aro spectrum. like, demisexual. but being both demi (aka needing to like someone as a person and getting to know them before feeling attracted to them) AND having commitment issues and a bunch of failed relationships is like, a DEADLY combo.

-i don't know. she is chaotic and not at all skilled with romance so she always fumbles it.

-but i also think she might just be 1000% aromantic whether or not she understands it fully

-i think that's very plausible

suki

-bisexual with a female lean and maybe poly

-big she/they vibes

-she's got endless autistic rizz like girl seduced sokka at light speed.

-in kyoshi island they called the bisexuals 'children of kyoshi' and the lesbians 'children of rangi'

-kyoshi island is basically lesbos if you didn't know /hj

-had her first kiss with mingxia before they decided that "ew, never again, i see you like a sister". she was super happy to meet meilin, mingxia's girlfriend

-DEFINITELY liked biyu and they might have been a thing in different circumstances. Aka if biyu hadn't betrayed her.

-would've dated both sokka and yue if yue was alive. like she would have loved yue. both of them having never left their respective homelands. both of them caring about community and having a duty to their people, a leadership position,,,

-but suki being so badass, liberated, free—and yue needing to sacrifice herself to BE free from her oppressive environment,,, like yue would also admire suki so much?? they would love exploring the world together and it'd put sokka out of a very awkward spot-

zuko

-demiromantic, bisexual. like this boy is SOMEWHERE im the ace spectrum but he's also bi. I'd say with a male lean.

-had internalised homophobia growing up, because, duh, fire nation

-he definitely thought that everyone feels like that when he was a child until his mother told him that this was very much NOT the case

-the gaang made him realise that it's totally okay and since they are all so queer he felt very safe with them

-made gay marriage legal in the fire nation

-made pride a thing in the fire nation inspired by the rainbow fire because i said so

-definitely felt attracted to both jet and sokka in the guy department.

-now, when it cames to girls, mai was his childhood crush.

-he definitely found song attractive but he was NOT in that headspace obviously

-same thing with jin although he was in a better headspace then. he introduced jin and song to each other post-war and they dated each other.

yue

-never got the chance to figure out how much girlypop liked women

-i could so easily claim she's a femme lesbian and that sokka was comphet, and I could even CONVINCE ya'll, because he is SO comphet coded, but I really love yue's storyline as it is and the lasting affect it has on sokka,,,,

-i can also imagine her on the ace spectrum

-she's so sapphic she's so queer bro is literally the moON?? what's more sapphic than the moon

-so, whatever, I'll say she's bi with a STRONG female lean. if she'd survived and joined the gaang she would have dated both sokka and suki and i truly believe that

-she would've loved suki and i just KNOW it

-love her so much let my girl be free of her arranged marriage

ty lee

-lesbian or pansexual. was ready to risk it all for mai. also completely down to be in a polycule

-she simply enjoyed male validation and attention due to her unmet childhood emotional needs. the dudes at the beach as well as sokka were giving massive comphet energy.

-i do also accept the possibility of her being pan, that'd be pretty great, but yknow, we do need more lesbians.

-despite being a fire nation citizen i think she'd be pretty open and liberated when it comes to her identity, at least wherever it's safe

-because her own ideology and philosophy is like. pseudo air nomad philosophy so i think she simply doesn't give a shit

-she is really into pride events. she LOVES the parade.

-i think she did have feelings for azula, at least as a child. then it all became really unhealthy,

-still, she felt sad about how things ended with azulw. she genuinely wishes it were different

mai

-she does also give comphet lesbian vibes BUT the "i love zuko more than I fear you" line SLAPS so I'm going to say bisexual with a female lean. she's also definitely asexual—and also demiromantic.

-ADORED ty lee, she just always assumed ty lee would choose azula

-it takes mai a long time to develop feelings for anyone, but when she falls she falls hard

-she's really not a big pride person, but she grows to enjoy it eventually. she goes with zuko and ty lee.

-she's not super vocal about her sexuality, but she also doesn't hide it. she doesn't give a shit. it's her business.

azula

-azula is a lesbian. not debatable like the others, to me.

-her feelings towards ty lee and mai are very reminiscent of sozin's feelings for roku i believe. like iykyk.

-she couldn't remember which of the boys was the one she was supposed to "like," but she remembered perfectly which bikini ty lee and mai were wearing. she picked chan like lesbians pick a random boy to crush on in middle school.

-and then she instesd remembered one of thr gusy who were flirting with either mai or ty lee. bestie was jealous.

-she had comphet, so much comphet. she wanted to be loved.

-so much internalised homophobia.

-she has a type, and it's brunette non benders of similar build. by which i mean ty lee and suki

-the ill will she holds towards mai in her comic for ruining their group over a stUpid BOY-

-it's comical,,

-i love her.

jet

-all the freedom fighters are queer

-jet is probably pansexual or bisexual. and also he/they

-he had a thing for katara but he sure as hell also had a thing for zuko

-he punches homophobes in the face

-i never liked jet when i was a kid because he was a jerk and i hated him with katara, but i grew to really enjoy his character and his arc

-this boy wants to eat the rich

-he doesn't want gay marriage, he wants to abolish marriage

smellerbee

-transfem ICON, she/her, though generally gender non conforming.

-and she's also also aromantic and asexual.

-queer platonic relationship with longshot, because of how deeply they love and understand and support each other

-if you misgender her on purpose the whole group will gang up on you and by the end of it you'll have four broken limbs and they'll be arrested for aggravated assault

longshot

-he's aromantic and asexual but he's got unmatched non-verbal autistic rizz

-as i said, QPR with smellerbee

-but all the freedom fighters plan to keep living together forever,, they're found family

-him and smellerbee just have a particularly special bond

the duke

-the duke is pansexual, i think

-i think he had a crush on toph

-also he/they

-and that's about all I've got

pipsqueak

-he/they/she

-pipsqueak's literally his chosen name, nothing cisgender about that,

-gay

sneers

-transmasc, he/they, potentially genderfluid

-dating kori who is bi

haru

-bisexual, female lean

-he/they, potentially genderfluid

teo

-gay, crush on aang

jin and song

-jin is pansexual, would definitely date song who is a lesbian

-zuko introduces them!!

uncle iroh

-straight ally. women are great! big womaniser back in his day.

-loves gay people

-huge support for zuko coming out

-that being said, he wasn't ALWAYS an ally. like he wasn't homophobic either, but he didn't support queer people before lu ten came out to him. then he accepted it, because he loved his son. finally, travelling the world and studying different philosophies led him to be a great ally.

-then he became the biggest ally ever amd a huge advocate for queer rights

-on a similar note, lu ten was gay. ozai was straight. zhao was straight and azulon was probably also straight. just getting them out of the wAy.

piandao

-gay gay gay. likes men.

-him and jeong jeong as a salty judgmental old couple is so real

-also everyone knows about it but nobody dares to give him shit for it

-he just glares and you immediately get off his back

-he could get himself a husband and nobody in the fire nation would do anything to stop him because they literally cannot arrest him

-he'll just shut the door on their face

jeong jeong

-also gay. big gay.

-tons of internalised homophobia, bless him

-tons of self hatred

-like, the way he sees his firebending as a curse of destruction and hatred and hates himself for it—instead of seeing all the colours of the dragons' rainbow fire, like zuko and aang, who symbolise the new generation

-it can work so well as a queer self-acceptance metaphor

-he definitely ends up with piandao, as i said before. begrudgingly in love.

hama

-lesbian. privately, as per water tribe tradition.

-nobody in the south gives her shit for it.

-she definitely had a relationship with kanna.

-when she lived in the fire nation, things were different. living as her authentic self was impossible—even secretly, it became near-impossible.

-hama's life is one big tragedy.

pakku

-straight. initially homophobic as per water tribe conservatism. the sort of, "just don't shove it in my face" homophobia

-but upon realising that like, both his friend group and his wife are incredibly queer, he gets over it

-iroh helps with educating him

-it's also canon that zuko gives the southern water tribe custody of hama after the war which i find incredibly sweet

-but since hama and kanna were... tight, I find myself incredibly entertained imagining possible interactions between pakku and hama

kanna (gran gran)

-kanna was bisexual.

-in the time she spent traveling from the north to the south she slept with a bunch of people

-fire nation pirates, sand bender bandits, earth kingdom soldiers... hakoda's father is a mystery. a mama mia situation.

-other flings include the herbalist, probably, (all old people know each other)

-even madame wu, why not?

-like it entertains me to think that kanna was unhinged the moment she left the Northern Water Tribe

-and being a non bender she used all tools at her disposal to reach the south if you know what i mean

-that being said, she also learned to fight a bit. probably. just to spite pakku.

-when she reached the south, she had a thing with hama. i say this because of the kataang parallel when hama was taken away.

hakoda and bato

-hakoda is bi, bato is gay

-hakoda loved kya, bato loved him secretly and never told him

-after kya died, bato was his only comfort, they fell in love

-once malina enters the situation too, it eventually ends up being a polycule

-note that i strongly dislike malina and those comics

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hideandseaking · 4 months

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Hori and Kashima are my OTP but I don't think about them too often because they break my brain in half so delightfully. They're so queer in the subtext of gsnk that you can spend hours contemplating what is actually happening. Is hori an egg of a trans woman? Is he bisexual because he finds kashima to have the most handsome face on the planet or is he just attracted to her? If he's trans is he a trans bisexual or trans lesbian? Is he nonbinary instead? Is kashima nonbinary or a gnc cis woman? Is she a lesbian and because hori is an egg of a trans woman that's why she's attracted to him? Or is she bisexual and has a heavy lean towards women with 2% men and hori is part of that? You literally can slap on any combo of sexualities and gender identities with these two and you find that it fits because these two just are meant to circle and intertwine each other so deeply that if you brought out a knife to separate them you would not be able to determine the cuts. This even falls into their backstory where they met because kashima was inspired by hori's theater performance to join the drama club because her dream is to perform alongside him because he is so talented at performing. But hori stepped down as an actor so kashima could be the lead actor because he finds her so talented and gets enjoyment from supporting her and wanting her to perform and wants her to succeed at performing and he thinks his best place is to aid that instead of hinder it by performing alongside her. She wants his attention because she finds him so interesting and wants him to be happy and he is constantly frustrated because her acts to make him happy are hindering his own actions to make her happy on his end. These two are just so deeply thought out that I cannot stop thinking about them the moment that I remember them. That's why they're my OTP

#so yes they're my favorite M/F ship but that's not even scratching the surface of them #also I haven't caught up to the manga in years don't spoil me I tend to catch up in big chunks #gsnk #horikashi #otp

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vinecoveredgarden · 10 months

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Paraphilias are Queer because "Queer" doesn't mean "gay" - it means fucking queer. It means "Society at large doesn't like this thing and it deviates from the norm, often with negative reactions or repercussions".

Paraphilias aren't orientations any more than whether you like blonde women or brunette women is an orientation - it's an attraction, it's a preference, it's a "I like this one".

Saying "Paraphiles aren't Queer because <thing they're attracted to> aren't a gender!" is fucking stupid. Do you hear yourself?

Are trans people queer? Are aro/ace people queer? But being trans has nothing to do with sexuality! And aro/ace people don't even HAVE a gender they're attracted to (in their respective attraction types - loving aces and horny aros I see you)!

Being a Paraphile is Queer because it goes against what society deems "acceptable". This doesn't make a paraphilia an attraction - it just makes it Queer.

You can be the most fucking cishet motherfucker alive and still be Queer for being fucking GNC. Not bisexual, not ace or aro, not agender or non-binary, just not preforming your gender "correctly". In the same vein, you can be the most allocishet on the planet and if you've got a paraphilias, congrats! You're fucking Queer!

#''being a paraphile isn't queer because-'' shut up #shut up right fucking now #go stand in the corner and think about what you did #propara #rq safe #rq #I am so fucking tired #I haven't even been here that long and I'm tired #this goes for disability and ND too I just didn't have room for your guys in the post

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prismalmelonman · 1 month

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Hey I would like some advice please. I consider myself an inclusive trans gay man. Emphasis on gay. I do not identify as bisexual at all, and have never been attracted to women. My very debate happy friend asked me to look at some vids of people and say how attracted I was. Ok. Well it turns out a LOT of the people I said I was attracted to could be proven to identify as women, all amab and usually trans women oddly none of the afab non-binary or afab very gnc women. My friend then says “ok so you see, EITHER sexual orientation is based on sex, and you are attracted to amabs only” (which admittedly is the pattern 😣) OR you are bisexual for being attracted to cis men, trans women and amab nb/queer. I just don’t know what to say. I am not bi. But I am attracted to trans women unless they pass 100% and even then if I know they still have a cock, I’m kinda interested. But then to say that feels transphobic. How can I articulate my sexuality in an honest but inclusive way?

I'm gonna be honest I don't know how to answer this? I'm not an arbiter on what is bisexual and what isn't bisexual, or what is and isn't transphobic. I'm not transfem, but I guess if it was turned around and someone was only attracted to me as I am now and only attracted to pre-op trans men it'd feel kinda scummy? At least to me. Or it'd feel like they're just attracted to androgynous/masculine ish women or enby folks and they're getting the fix via a pre-op trans guy. But I'm not entirely sure about other ppl.

I'd say you just gotta figure it out for yourself. Maybe you do discover you're bi with masc preferences, maybe you're still gay.

Again i'm really not the best person to answer this because I'm having questions about my sexuality lately myself (discovering I have a heavy preference to men, both cis and trans, but still wanting to be pansexual cause I do like women just to a lesser extent and I'm getting confused about labels).

Sexuality can be really complex and hard to figure out for yourself. It's a journey between you and it. I'm sure you'll figure it out with time, as will I. Till then though, queer always works too.

Edit: also your friends shouldn't be quizzing you on your sexuality and making you anxious about whether or not you're transphobic or bi or whatever. That's weird. If you're just gay then you're gay. If you're into only men, including feminine ish men (THIS IS NOT CALLING PRE-OP TRANS WOMEN FEM MEN DO NOT TAKE THIS AS THAT PLEASE) then that's what you're into. And your friends shouldn't be trying to go "gotcha actually you're bisexual cause these photos of random people whose genders you didn't know say so" like that's weird as fuck.

#asks #ask #queer #gay #bi #bisexual #trans #transgender #lgbt #lgbtq #sexuality #pansexual

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collegetennisoriginstory · 9 months

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Interesting question re: the f! versus m! versions of the LIs. This is just personal taste, I don't think any of them are more or less loveable based on gender!, but I do think f!Rayyan is more attractive to me than her male counterpart, while for G & Sam it's the opposite - I exclusively romance their male counterparts. Tobin is the same for me in both versions, but I still prefer f!Tobin simply because I prefer playing as a woman hehe. For context, I am a bisexual woman leaning more towards women, buuut I'm really into gnc women and I guess G and Sam both just feel like they fall outside a category I am attracted to :'o f!G feels more femme fatale as a woman, and f!Sam is very cute.

This is supremely intriguing, thank you so much for answering!! I absolutely live for interactions like this!

My answer became a goddamn ESSAY (holy shit I'm sorry) but I'd definitely love to hear more of you guy's thoughts on this, cause this is super interesting to me!

For G, I totally agree. I feel the pivotal traits that shape them (cynicism, stoicism about life and what life throws at them, adapting to circumstance, instead of stubbornly sticking to 'what they want', their parents' divorce, being caught between worlds and used to living in multiple places at once—Canadian-French from their mom and French-French from their dad, their intense commitment to their belief that things don't last, and you can't expect them to) feel more... attractive to me in a woman than a man (because lord knows we have enough flaky non-committal men in this world), but I think that's probably a subjective opinion.

For Tobin, I think it's inevitable that their softness/gentleness AND their queerness is influenced by their gender, and I love that idea, and I hope to explore more of that later on. For M!Tobin, I feel like they've always had to deal with the fact that they're a little "too" soft for what the world expects from them (a black american in the ultimately super-machismo world of sports), and they've always at least "fit in" with the rest of their team because of their athletic prowess AND how much attention they get from the ladies. Now, exploring their sexuality, having to come to terms with the fact that they are attracted to men as well (and what to do with that information)... I think it adds an extra layer of vulnerability.

As for F!Tobin, I think there's similar tensions—but in different ways. E.g. maybe they're the way they are, so gentle and considerate and kind because, in some ways, they're compensating (subconsciously or consciously) with the stereotype that black women athletes are "too powerful", "too fierce", and they've only ever wanted to be accepted, respected, loved, hence they've always been softer than they have to be, kinder than they have to be, more considerate etc. etc. But then they met MC, and perhaps they're learning to put that all away, and just... be. Without fear of being "too much"—with MC reassuring them that they're OK just the way they are, and that their strength and courage does not need to be tempered for anyone else's benefit.

And finally, for Rayyan, again, I absolutely agree—there's something about F!Rayyan and how, coming from a conservative immigrant Muslim family (e.g. there was that scene with a brief mention of how their dad never even thought they should be serious about turning pro, becoming a professional athlete especially because she's a girl), she's probably had to fight for absolutely everything she's wanted in this world, and that's why she's so steely on the outside, why she's so unapologetic about pursuing the things she wants because god knows the amount of sacrifice she's already put in. There's still that dimension in M!Rayyan, being an immigrant, threading that line between wanting to do their family proud, wanting to pursue their own dreams, ambition—so much ambition—but also fierce loyalty, and uncompromising, unyielding courage.

Sam feels the most... unchanged whether or not I imagine them as female or male, the experiences that made them the way they are (and how they interact with MC) are the same (e.g. being in love with your best friend, being extremely open about experimenting with literally any type of human romantically except the ONE person they actually love and trust with all their heart, scattered loveable goofball tennis nerd that they are).

#college tennis: origin story #ct:os #if #interactive fiction #asks #rayyan #tobin #sam #g #gender

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stillfrownyclownlol · 9 months

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Lgbtqia+ hcs because I don't know if I'm gonna make it till June lmao (or, if I'm gonna live after it since I'm planning on wearing my flags In public 🤡)

Tw for csa mentions (because why don't I keep projecting huh)

Ashlyn Banner

-She/Her but in a "never thought about pronouns her entire life" kinda way. Doesn't mind they/them. She likes dressing masc/feeling masc, but doesn't really like being "perceived" as masc. Like...masc on her own time lmao. (I'm projecting so hard rn). "Gender neutral" kinda- like agender- but like in a "I don't care about my gender at all I just am more used to the gender they assigned me at birth"

-Demi rose 🌹 I'm also projecting here. Takes her a while to come into her feelings, but maybe that's the "never had friends ever" coming through.

Aiden Clark

-he/him but like he won't care if you use smth else for him lol. Cis gnc kinda guy eyyyyy (better in heels than ashlyn)

-unlabeled and that's how he likes it, nobody's business who he likes kissing lol. I feel like he's kissed a guy before just to try it. On the aro-allo spectrum ngl.

Ben Clark

-He/Him, is fine with They/Them. Honestly likes getting called She/Her too but she's been pretty shy about mentioning it :") Taylor likes doing her makeup if they're having a "femme-day". Settled on genderfluid/genderflux after a while.

-Greyromantic Caedsexual (Ace). Shane was part of a group of slightly older kids, and when he was getting bullied Shane and some other kids sexually assaulted him multiple times...technically was a queer assault since Ben was seen as a sissy because his personality and hobbies were "feminine", and this was to goad him into having a physical reaction :/

Taylor Hernández

(Ngl I'm so annoyed there's not more colors but whatever)

-She/Her and They/Them, identified as cis for a long time since it was what they knew, but once she learned more about it she experimented with her gender a lot more, they identified as non-binary for a while before moving to paragirl.

-Pan to aro/ace pipeline because I'm projecting :) she didn't really handle it well at the beginning, but Ben, Ash and Aiden are all also a-spec so she had a lot of support ^_^ They felt "invalid" because of the csa they went through when they were younger and they thought it was more like a trauma response than their actual sexuality. After talking with Ben about it tho she understood that even if they were related that didn't make her any less valid.

Tyler Hernández

-He/Him cis guy I'm sorry/lh

-was kinda annoying about queer people because actually being raised as a Catholic Mexican boy makes you kinda weird (IM SORRY THIS IS JUST FROM PERSONAL EXPERIENCE) BUT he gets better I promise

-Bisexual boyfailure and took him crushing on Logan to accept it 🤡

Logan Fields

-He/Him and a bit of a stickler about it because he gets misgendered rather frequently (less as he got older but still), doesn't mind getting called gendered terms tho (Taylor calls him "sis", and he calls himself an "Astrology girl")

-intersex, found out when he was 15ish since his puberty had been delayed, and he's really insecure about it...🙃 he was assigned male at birth so he wouldn't say he's trans, but his experiences overlap a fair bit. Takes testorone and medication because he has low electrolytes. I could write a whole essay here but I have to go soon 😭

-Gay :> He realized pretty quickly but he's intensely scared of people finding out, has only told his grandparents. They took it very well ^_^ His grandpa has some gay friends so sometimes Logan goes to the senior center to talk with them about stuff :)

#sbg #school bus graveyard #school bus graveyard webtoon #sbg (webtoon)#ashlyn banner #aiden clark #ben clark #taylor hernández #tyler hernández #logan fields #headcanons #tw csa mention

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velvetvexations · 2 months

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Forgot to add it to the post but even my partner, a cis bisexual man, deals with misogyny and androphobia when he wears masks in public. When he's with me, a short, woman-lite person, no one glares at him over his mask. But the second I walk away he literally has people of all genders make direct eye contact and get aggressive because he's very tall and VERY masculine and covering his face. He's legit admired to me that he's terrified of someone actually seeing him as SUCH a threat they attack him. The saving grace isn't his masculinity, it's that he's white, bcs I'm sure men of color who mask still get WAY worse treatment if they can even safely wear a mask in public at all given Certain Stereotypes. No one assumes they're sick or the primary care giver of a sick person or just trying to protect themselves and the public, they are a strange man covering his face and thus not only a reminder of covid(ableism tbh doesn't matter if they're abled that's still abelism) but also either a weak sissy(anti-gnc sentiment paired with homophobia and misogyny and maybe even transmisogny in certain contexts) or A Threat(androphobia).

No one ever gives me so much as a sideways glance about my mask. Never caught a glare. People smile at me. It ONLY changes if I dress VERY masc and bind. Only then do I get the glares. Neutral and Fem me? No one cares.

Gee, sure seems like the patriarchy isn't actually all that great for men/masc folks actually!! Sure sounds like masc people do face a form of discrimination and harm on the basis of their manhood and if they don't conform to what is expected of men!!! Sure seems possible that men of color might have highers rates of covid, and thus severe illness and death, for being forced to unmask to not be seen as a threat!! Why is this shocking to so may people!?!

I s2g some of these people convinced men cannot be harmed on the basis of being men must live under a rock.

(Anyway, sorry again for the rant, I just woke up on the angry side of the bed today I guess.)

Perfectly okay anon! I've not really been in a great headspace today either, honestly, so we're laying on top of each other.

#transandro phobia

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skrunksthatwunk · 3 months

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R, Mako & Ryuko both bisexual, lesbian, or pansexual?

[OPPORTUNITY TO TALK ABOUT KILL LA KILL SPOTTED] ok SO. i feel very strongly that ryuko is a lesbian if she's into anyone at all. i've talked a lot about what i think the wedding dress scene means for her character and her relationship to, in short, gender + romantic conformity and non-queerness. it's her being tempted by the safety and community (the family) that being a Regular Girl Wifey like her gross fascy mom wants would bring her, which she ultimately rejects because of mako and senketsu's intervention. that stuff isn't her. she would have to erase a lot of herself to fit into that image. she is not meant to play that role, and if she tried, she would no longer be ryuko.

there's a lot of wonderful readings of this, i.e. genderqueer, aro/ace/aroace, and even non-queer gnc interpretations, because rejecting gender roles regarding romance, social status, etc carries weight for a lot of those groups. but when i watched that scene as somebody who recently figured out they're a lesbian, that's the lens i saw it through, and it meant a lot to me. it still does, obviously. actually, klk broadly means a lot to me for sapphic reasons, but that's even more of a digression. MY POINT IS i think she's a lesbian and i am very insistent, at the very least, that she's not into guys.

but for mako i'm like yk what go crazy. i think bi/pan readings of her make sense and i think lesbian readings of her make sense, and i'm not particularly passionate about either. i just know she's absolutely crazy about ryuko, and shows clear and obvious I LIKE WOMEN I THINK WOMEN ARE HOT signs throughout the show, which is so real of her. i think i read her as a lesbian bc i don't think she shows any signs of being into guys? in the series? but 1) that's an interpretation thing 2) i could be misremembering some stuff, as it's been a little bit.

tl;dr ryuko's a lesbian to me and i feel very strongly about that and mako can be whatever so long as she's still sapphic, but i think i read her as a lesbian. if you asked me two months from now, maybe i'd say she's pan. who knows~ anyway ryuko and mako are dating and they're canon idc idc

anyway this question made me think of this yt comment i screenshotted like a year ago lol. sums it up ig

#I HOPE THAT ANSWERED YOUR QUESTION. UM. YEAH #sorry the klk fandom is so so dead so this made me very happpy and i wanted to go off about it. hoorayy #ryumako really demonstrate a dichotomy in my queer hc habits where ryuko's hyperspecific and increasingly based on personal projection #and mako's like ehhhh fucken uh idk labels but she's gay as hell yk #ace butch and/or transmasc lesbian ryuko is a hc that i wear like a life jacket and im not letting go of it #klk #kill la kill #ryuko matoi #mako mankanshoku #ryumako

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psychoticallytrans · 1 year

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I'm going to preface this post with that this is a pretty niche intracommunity issue, but it's been bugging me a while.

The right to define yourself as a queer person includes not only the right to claim labels that feel correct, but the right to reject labels that don't fit. That's a huge part of the whole point. However, some people seem to feel like being queer just means that we've made some different identity boxes to sort people into, and that sorting yourself wrongly means you need correction.

I, personally, am a GNC man. I wear skirts because they're comfy and trap heat in winter and long hair because I'm extremely vain about my hair. Someone once spent the better part of three hours arguing that I need to "at least" identify as a nonbinary man. Which is... not how anything works? I've identified as nonbinary in the past, but eventually realized that just wasn't correct for me, and moved into identifying as a binary man. I strongly support nonbinary people, but I don't happen to be nonbinary in any way. More commonly, people will decide that I'm "fem" or "femme", which... also not really? Those are loaded community words and I don't happen to identify with them. I'm GNC. That's not the same thing.

I also see this happen a lot with sexuality. It's one thing to look at someone going "I'm straight but sometimes... I wonder..." and introduce them to the incredible variety of mspec identities to see if anything strikes a chord. It's entirely another for someone to go "I'm pansexual." and some dick to roll up and start telling them they're biphobic for not saying they're bisexual, or for someone saying "I'm bisexual, and I'm not attracted to women." to have people telling them that they're not really bisexual. "Two or more" does not necessarily have to include both binary genders, or either of them.

Deciding someone else's personal labels based on what you think they should identify as is just plain rude, and insisting on them after they've objected is even more rude. Don't do it.

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punkeropercyjackson · 2 months

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Bisexual binary man Percy truthers need to be given shock collars or somethin',y'all can't be looking at Percy literally HATING men for being authority figures/abusers/pedophiles and saying that's attraction every time or that the young adult wants to fuck men their dad's age when they've explicitly stated that trait makes them ugly to them when they're also a children's protagonist who hasn't really had sexual references applied to them even as an under the radar joke.There's never been any 'queerbaiting' with Percy unless you count their musical actor making them act gnc to add-on to why they got bullied for even more realism and even than that's gender fuckery,which has no inherent overlap with orientation because ALL queer people can't be femme,even aroaces.Pjo transandrodork fans and cisgirl Pjo fans stfu,don't make me show you my transfem afrolatina Percy art and edits so you get scared and cry about how you wish Lukie Pookie would save you from the females who don't know how to do a real revolution or how fucked the world is because they turned into mom friends instead of fascists

#percy jackson #transfem percy jackson #percy jackson defense squad #black percy #latino percy #autistic percy jackson #percy jackson is punk #anti luke castellan #antilukercy #anti percy x gods #pjo gods slander #pjo #hoo #biphobia #androcentrism #transmisogyny #posers #💌#summerposting

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blood-choke · 1 year

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I thought butch is a lesbian only term?

hmmm yes and no? this is something that doesn't really have a simple answer. it depends who you ask; people have different opinions about it.

in general, the term butch means a lot of different things in the lgbt community. obviously there's butch lesbians, but it's also a term that's used in ball culture, by drag queens and gay men. it's an adjective, it's a gender, it's an orientation. i assume you're referencing the other anon, and i have no idea what they may mean when they call themselves butch. if we're talking about bisexual women then the truth is that bisexual women can have just as complex experiences with gender and presentation as lesbians and i don't really think it benefits anybody to exclude them from the community.

like i said previously, butch is not just an "aesthetic"; there's more to it than just dressing a certain way. i think it's way more harmful to pretend like other women don't also grapple with their gender identity and their sexuality and their gendered roles in society-- basically, we should celebrate our similarities rather than argue our differences.

a lot of the time people say bisexuals can't be butches because they still "cater to men" which to me is just a gross thing to say. there are plenty of bi people who prefer women, who do not pursue men, who are gender nonconforming; and even if they do prefer men, if they date men, that still doesn't mean they're "catering" to anybody. it's a very... dehumanizing and misogynistic attitude to have when talking about bi women imo (and straight women as well)

the term butch/femme was historically used by all gay women; butch/femme in this context, are roles that came about in the working-class lesbian bar scene in the 50s, 60s, and 70s. there were plenty of bisexual women that went to lesbian bars and filled these roles as well. there's bulldagger, bulldyke, and stud, that came out of Black lesbian communities. there's kiki, which isn't used at all anymore, to describe lesbians that don't identify as either. there are people that will insist that bisexuals use the term "stag" and "doe" which i don't think is fair; most people do not know what these terms mean and there is no "stag community" as far as i'm aware. i'm pretty sure these are just tumblr terms.

what it all comes down to is that when people see a gnc woman in the street, they're not going to rush over and politely ask if she's a lesbian or not. to be blunt, most of the time they're going to call them the same slur, regardless. the world is going to treat them the same, regardless. so for me personally i'd rather offer them a little bit of relief in a community that is familiar and understanding rather than exclude them to face that kind of shit all alone iykwim.

#but yes this was like. a huge discourse topic on here a few years ago lol #and im like. 99% sure that discourse is the origin of the stag/doe thing bc i've never seen it anywhere else except tumblr #when we talk abt bisexual women historically they are inextricable from lesbians. there is no way to separate them we have a shared history #and to pretend that bi women are so different from us is. to be frank. stupid #also this is not me inviting that discourse im just expressing how i feel about it. i am not trying to argue #ask #anonymous

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officialgleamstar · 1 year

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Personal DnDads Pride Headcanons

some of these are simple but most are paragraphs long because of who I am as a person (incapable of saying things concisely), so they're going under a readmore. vaguely organized by age group.

one quick note: feel free to cheer on or rag on any of these that you please, variety in opinion is the spice of fandom life! everyone's headcanons are so real and valid to me, i am a strong believer in having as many contradicting fandom opinions as you want. for this list, i just went with everything that is "default" to my fan content. others' transfem sparrow is shaking hands with my gnc sparrow and yes, i'm listing that one on purpose, because if you make fun of transfem sparrow, you are getting hit by my bat. be fucking nice.

please enjoy!

Season 1 Dads and Spouses

Carol is a lesbian. This is simply canon to me. It’s important that this is first and visible to everyone.

Bi/pan polyamorous Henry and Mercedes is also simply canon to me. Honestly that one might be fully canon based on some of the things that happen in Odyssey

Henry is unlabeled but in the sense that he calls himself ‘queer’, ‘bisexual’, ‘gay’, or ‘pansexual’, fully depending on his mood and the conversation happening

Ron is also unlabeled but in the sense that he has never thought about it in his life and isn’t intending to now

Glenn is bisexual but never talks about it unless someone else mentions it first, and he tries really really hard to never think about his gender once in his life. The queer angst I give Glenn could be a whole post of its own but just know he has issues. He does fuck men though

Darryl still isn’t really sure on his sexuality and probably never will be, but he’s actually explored it a bit, so that’s better than whatever the fuck was going on with him before the show started. Henry likes giving him subtle bear pride flag accessories because Darryl actually wears them a lot. His favorite color is brown, after all.

Jodie, Nicky, and Taylor all are bisexual with a preference for women. Sexuality isn’t genetic but it is for them specifically.

Morgan is also bisexual. Literally none of the season 1 parents are straight except maybe Samantha and even with her, my opinion fully matters on the day and how I’m feeling.

Henry and Lark have definitely had an exchange at some point where Lark asked him how it was to ‘experience twink death’, to which Henry just went ‘get back to me in a few years on that, kid.’ and Lark spent the rest of the week furiously moping because clearly, he’s a twunk, Father- (words of a man who did not take care of himself well enough from the ages of 18-25 to ever be a twunk)

This is my little shipper brain but Jodie only realized he liked men after being stuffed into the Odyssey and being around Ron 24/7 for months on end (and the demon stuff, but he didn’t know that yet for obvious reasons). In his timeline, he had a whole arc about it and now he’s persistently attracted to strange men who don’t make sense as well as women light-years out of his league. He’s still a little miffed that Henry doesn’t remember the very long conversations they had about it, but him and Nicky get to wear matching bi pride bracelets now, so he guesses it’s fine.

Kiddads and Spouses

Lark is bisexual. He has known this since kindergarten when his parents explained what the flag all over their house was and has never thought about it since.

Lark also helped Rebecca realize she was bisexual because she would ask him about it in a class they shared in high school

This is utterly unrelated to LGBT headcanons but I think Veronica and Rebecca grew up in San Dimas with the kiddads, and were friends with them in high school. It just makes sense to me

Unlabeled Terry Junior is something that can be so personal to me. In a general sense, he likes everyone romantically, and identifies enough with the asexual spectrum to wear an ace ring, but he doesn’t really see the point in putting a name on it. He’s just Terry Junior and he’s happy with that.

Him, Lark, and Nicky did have a group chat called ‘bisexuals with an agenda’ in high school though, where they would make plans for pranking or otherwise harassing their fathers during group outings. Terry loves Ron but that does not mean he is above ruining his day. It’s done with affection.

My thoughts on Sparrow could be a full fanfiction but gonna try to keep it simple (retroactive edit: did not keep it simple). Sparrow is the token cishet of the kiddads, but in the queerest way possible. He’s an Oak-Garcia, of course he’s explored himself very thoroughly. At current, he identifies as gender non-confirming cis man, but he has had periods of his life where he transitioned and then detransitioned. In early high school, he identified as non-binary. From senior year up until just before Hero was born, he lived as a trans lesbian. He doesn’t see these periods as phases, just as his identity changing over time. Currently he’s perfectly happy identifying as a man, but wouldn’t be wholly shocked if he transitioned again. Calls himself “cis but gender is obviously, massively, a social construct and so it feels unfair to expect myself to fit into these boxes when identity can be so fluid and-”

Rebecca still calls him her wife, and also a granola lesbian or MILF from time to time because it makes him laugh, and while Nicky was still in his life, he would send Sparrow trans memes a lot. Sparrow also has always liked being seen as non-binary, he sees it as ‘winning at being androgynous’. Competitive to the sense of nonsensical Sparrow my beloved

Sparrow always wears women’s clothing but that’s for autistic reasons. They just fit nicer for his brain. It helps the gender(tm) thing though, he near exclusively wore hand-me-downs from Mercedes throughout all of high school

Sorry for talking so much about Sparrow. He’s my favorite character so he is the focus of many of my thoughts. Anyways

Never been a huge fan of the ‘Grant was outed by his crush in the Forgotten Realms’ headcanon, I think Grant came out about a year beforehand. Long enough where everything about it has settled but it’s still new enough that Darryl forgot for a split second and thought Grant might have a crush on Killa during the Four Knight arc. He’d known he liked boys a while before that, and also his parents kind of figured he was gay most of his life since he had 95% girl friends

Marco is pansexual! He met Grant in college because he worked the front desk of their dorm building and would always wear a bunch of pride pins

Nicky was Grant’s first good friend who was a boy, I like to think that they were childhood friends. Grant announced this to his dad at the age of 10 by going “Nick Close is transgender now, so that means you don’t have to worry about me only talking to girls because he’s a boy.” and Darryl went “…Alright?” and then googled what ‘transgender’ means

Speaking of, Nicky realized he was trans because of Mulan. Both Glenn and Jodie, in their respective timelines, googled ‘How do I know if my daughter is a lesbian’ before he came out because Nicky would rewatch the reflection song so often and also the tomboy-isms. Everyone felt very stupid for being surprised when he cut all of his hair off, cried, and asked to change his name

T4T Nicky and Cassandra is canon and they rubbed it into everyone's faces when they were together, Anthony is just afraid of the truth

Cassandra is trans het. I love trans het people more than anything and I love her so this makes sense to me.

Veronica is non-binary, in the sense of “girl but to the left”. They/she pronouns, calls themself a girlie and a mom but not a woman, dresses in a kickass pantsuit at formal events. I’m also in love with her

Season 2 Teens and Friends

Hero and Normal are both trans. When Hero came out, Sparrow sat Normal down to explain why Hero was now a sister instead of a brother and Normal responded with “Well, that’s not fair. How come Hero can be a girl but I can’t be a boy?!” and Sparrow just stared at him for a really long time before going “You can be a boy, honey.” and they went thrift shopping as a family for new clothes the next day

Normal is stealth trans, mostly because Hero is the same way and he copies her, but also because it doesn’t really occur to him that he passes. He just figures that people knows even though he is on testosterone and binds and presents masculine. It helps that his family presents pretty gender-neutral as a whole, so most people assume he had long hair as a kid because his parents are hippies. They had a son and daughter, both with long hair. They now have a daughter and a son, both with short hair. To the general populace, nothing has changed, they just misremembered which kid was older.

Taylor is a demi-boy and spends every year growing more and more feminine. Definitely calls their gender something like ‘boy with a dash of girl on the side’ with their friends. Growing out his hair was a newer thing and he regrets cutting it, even if it was a super cool sequence and he looked like an anime protagonist, because he liked how it framed his face.

Cassandra has always maintained an openness about her trans identity, so Taylor’s the same way. He’s always got the he/they pronoun pin on (I figure this is normalized by the time of season 2, but he’s just very pleased about it), he has a variety of trans and non-binary pride pins that he cycles through, and they like painting their nails because it’s an easy way for them to feel a little more feminine.

Cassandra’s living room is decorated with a massive trans pride flag and LED lights. The first time the teens walk into Taylor’s home, Scary says “it looks like a Twitch stream in here” at the same time that Normal says “it looks like my sister’s room in here” and they high-five while Taylor yells at them to be nice.

Hermie is genderfluid and uses any pronouns. This is real to me. He has my own teenage trait of gender shifting every three hours and never knowing what to do about it and he will be suffering with this until he exits puberty, at which point he gives up and just sees what gender other people choose for him.

Hermie is also pan/ace! No further thoughts here. She just is.

Erica just goes by queer because she doesn’t think the common passerby deserves to know her rich inner life and she’s right, they don’t

I tend to say a lot that all of the S2 kids are bisexual, and I represent them as such, but I truly believe that Lincoln and Normal both have no idea what’s going on with their sexualities. They say they’re bisexual for bisexual teen squad reasons but Normal is going through a constant crisis of “Am I gay or bisexual?” and Lincoln looks up the definition of aro/ace on a weekly basis. Neither of them will ever express this until Scary goes “maybe I’m not bisexual, actually.”

On that note, Scary is a lesbian but she’s not going to realize that until college. For now, she’s rocking with the bisexuality and pretends it’s not weird that her ‘crushes’ on boys feel wildly different than her crushes on girls. Yes I am projecting. This is not a secret. We project onto Scary here.

#mine #dndads #dungeons and daddies #happy pride!#im just gonna drop this and go shower. sorry it is so fucking long LMAO

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heterophobicdyke · 3 months

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I'm seeing so many bi women getting mad that most radfems prefer febfems to nonfebfem bi women and like zero of them saying a peep about how lesbophobic and misogynistic het partnered women are. A lot of women on here like to oversimplify the psychological effect one's partner has on oneself to "hurr dburr s*m*n make women stupid" but the only effect that disgusting secretion has is on women's vaginal flora/pH/vaginal health (yeast infections for one thing 💀), it's bending over backwards for males constantly to justify their shitty jakey's misogyny that then normalizes misogyny in their eyes, they can't acknowledge certain things as misogynistic without also being forcibly confronted with the knowledge they've been putting up with/sleeping with a misogynist themselves. osa women on here don't want to talk about that tho, they want to twist what women are saying because they're deeply uncomfortable that radfeminism is het critical and they don't want to examine their choice to pursue het relationships even knowing how harmful it is to them and every woman who knows them. Just like the makeup fandom shitting themselves and crying every time someone criticizes the toxic sludge they waste so much money and health on

I stopped calling myself a radical feminist years ago because even the theory treats every female experience as the same, as if misogyny is the only form of oppression and women don't experience further disempowerment if they are lesbian, POC, poor and/or disabled.

Het-partnered radfems will spend all of their activist energy critiquing gay men for things like drag and leather kink while they go home to OSA men who are attracted to women - the ones who actually rape us. Het-partnered radfems will have all the empathy for women who get botox and boob jobs but turn into Mean Girls when "discussing" trans-identified females (often lesbians), despite both types of females succumbing to gender and its expectations. Ironic how "radical" feminists have more empathy for conforming women than those who rebel the expectations of womanhood so much that they feel they can only survive by identifying as men. Again, feminine het women are the victims to "manly" lesbians.

I am tired of hearing how much women who are in relationships with men "hate men." I hate how much het-partnered women feel the need to overcompensate for their relationship decision with their lil radblr blog. I'm tired of them banging on about gay cultural things for GNC gay men like drag while literally sleeping with the enemy. I'm tired of het-partnered women expecting lesbians to abandon gay men in our shared experience of homophobia when they can't even abandon the men who rape us.

And you know what? Being bisexual and choosing a man while claiming to be a radical feminist is 10x worse than a straight woman doing so because you're actually attracted to women. You can't claim fear of being lonely, fear of having no sex, or whatever else. You're into women and you still chose a man.

So yeah, I am not a radical feminist. Because all it is is having empathy and unconditional love for the most conforming, privileged women while judging the gay and lesbian community's most vulnerable because they have a gender identity. As if straights need an excuse to hate gays though, right? Gender identity is just flavour of the month.

#ask #gender #homophobia #radical feminism #radfem

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demonic-shadowlucifer · 1 year

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Let's talk about Exclusionists and how they harm the community they claim to protect: A collection of hate.

Welp! Pride Month is just around the corner, and with it, exclusionist and TERF rhetoric. A few disclaimers before we get into this: -While this is about the harmful things Exclusionists have done, I would like to add that the Inclusionist Community can be *just* as guilty of doing the things I'm about to mention. -Furthermore, I believe that both the "Inclusionist" and "Exclusionist" labels are kind of pointless tbh, since being inclusive is just the bare minimum, y'know? -TERFs and their variants will also be mentioned since TERF Rhetoric is a frequent thing in Exclusionist communities, especially in Longsword Lesbian communities. -This is not intended to be a discourse post at all, this is mostly for educational purposes and awareness. Furthermore, I don't think being queer should be controversial at all.

-And of course, HEAVY trigger warning for the following: Exclusionism, TERF Rhetoric, Ableism, Suicide Bait, Encouragement of Violence and more. For this post, I have collected screenshots of many hurtful things exclusionists have said, and evidence to prove links to rhetoric from non-queer homophobes. These are screenshots from Tumblr, Twitter and Instagram as well. I give credit to @/animefacialreconitionsoftware01 on Tumblr, Exclusionist Struggle Tweets on Twitter, exclusmoment on Instagram and many others for these screenshots.

So, hang on, what even is an exclusionist?

An exclusionist is a group of mostly queer individuals who attempt to gatekeep the LGBTQ+ Community by claiming certain groups aren't truly queer or "not queer enough".

Exclusionist can be used on it's own, but also as an umbrella term for other groups, such as: Mspec Exclusionists (Battleaxe Bis) - A group of exclusionists that believe that other Multisexual labels outside of "Bi" are harmful, or that they're the same as bisexual. Their primary targets tend to be pansexuals and panromantics. Transmedicalists - A group of mostly exclusionists (Mostly trans people, but occasionally cis people), who believe that you must meet a certain number of requirements in order to be Transgender. While every transmedicalist has different views, the most common opinion is that dysphoria is required to be trans. One well known Transmedicalist is Kalvin Garrah. Trans Exclusionary Radical Feminists (TERF) - One of the most recognizable Exclusionist groups. While TERFs aren't inherently queer, their rhetoric can overlap with many other groups (Especially Longsword Lesbians and Transmedicalists on some occasions), so they get a mention here. There's not really much to say about them, outside of the fact that they're simply transmisic feminists. Their primary targets include trans women, but they may also target trans men, nonbinary folks, bisexuals and other mspec groups, intersex folks and sometimes ace/aro folks. The group also has *several* links to white supremacy. Longsword Lesbians - Speaking of Longsword Lesbians, this is a group that intends to fight lesbian erasure. This one might have had good intentions at first, but then started excluding other lesbians, becoming an exclusionist group, though I can't get much information on it's origins. Their primary targets include Nonbinary Lesbians, Mspec Lesbians and PNC Lesbians. They may also exclude GNC lesbians and trans lesbians, though not all of them do. Gravity Knife Gays - Exclusionists that target other gay men, primary nonbinary gays, Mspec Gays and PNC Gays. They may also target GNC gay men and trans gay men, though not all of them do. Aspec Exclusionists - I don't think I need to explain this one. So, why are they bad?

Well, there's evidence on how it's bad. Outside of erasure and gatekeeping harmless identities, a lot of exclusionists have a straight up habit of harassing other queer folks or calling for harassment. And there's plenty of evidence to prove it as well. I'm going to warn you, some of these contain suicide bait and slurs. Please proceed with caution if that sort of thing stresses you out. Some words are censored to avoid getting banned (and for my own comfort as well). Obviously, you have the ones that are simple gatekeeping, which is almost always bad.

(Image ID: A Tumblr post from user "alpinestag". The text reads "REAL lesbians don't date or sleep with men in their past lives! Let's be real, if your soul married a man 1000 years ago, you're bisexual"). I *was* originally going to give this person the benefit of the doubt and assume they were joking, but when I looked they had a *lot* of TERFy shit on their blog, so they were definitely serious.

(Image ID: A Tumblr post from user "didcourze". The text reads "on asexuals having sex, why would u want to have sex with someone if not attracted to them? i get it u still have a sex drive even if ure not attracted to people sexually but how could you justify using someone that u clearly have no interest in solely for sex, ur own pleasure, like that's so fucked??") And then, there's folks that will take it to more extreme levels, like these fellas. This one might not be calling for harassment, but it is *heavily* implied.

(Image ID: A screenshot from a Twitter post in dark mode that shows another screenshot of a Twitter user's bio, also in dark mode. Some information is blacked out in red. The primary tweet has the text "Fucking trenders. Excluse do your thing 💖" The screenshot of the twitter bio below the text contains many plant emojis and heart emojis, and shows the text "I genuinely want to be nice to you all", "hy/him/hers", "transmasch butch boi. OMNIGAY", "'TRENDER" on T" and other information about their location, age, followers and following and the join date. End ID). This one on the other hand... this is blatant harassment.

(Image ID: A screenshot of a Tumblr ask from an anonymous user. The message reads "transwomen are men and if they were really women you wouldnt have to be screaming it 100 times. also k yourself.". A word that starts with k is also blocked out in red. End ID). "Asexuals don't experience oppression" ....Are you sure about that?

(Image ID: A screenshot of a Tumblr dm by a user named "aphobickaito". Some words are blacked out in red. The messages read "D bitch.". Did your daddy r you so hard that your brain got fucked too and you think this dragon cake shit is funny? Because that's some shit". End ID) For those wondering, the last censored word is the r-slur. Some posts will also advocate for straight up violence, like these ones below.

(Image ID: A screenshot of a Tumblr post from a user named "aletheius". The text reads "I love being aphobic. if you don't want to bed the love of your life you should be beaten up and stuffed in a locker".)

(Image ID: A screenshot of a twitter message/post from user "gowonstiara". The text reads "asexuals deserve to d*3". End ID).

(Image ID: A screenshot of a twitter user's bio in dark mode. Some information and words are blocked out in either red or blue. A scribble of blue has the words "Irrelevant stuff here". The rest of the bio reads "k all bi/pan lesbians". End ID).

(Image ID: A screenshot of a twitter post from user "brontydownunder" in dark mode. The text reads "'They're putting asexuals in concentration camps in China' good. Put more". End ID).

(Image ID: An screenshot of a post containing an image of a cropped Asexual flag. The text on the flag is slightly edited, and reads "START KILLING US". End ID) A lot of exclusionist posts also have a *lot* of suicide bait in them as well, such as these ones shown below. Again, scroll with caution if you are sensitive to these sorts of things. There is also an f-slur being used with malicious intent in one of these.

(Image ID: A twitter post from user "beebies" in dark mode, with the two e's replaced by 3. Part of the text has been blocked out with red. The text reads "if u go by they/them go k ll urself no offense lol 😍". End ID). I was going to censor the slur in this one, but decided not to just to show how malicious exclusionists really can be.

(Image ID: A screenshot of a tumblr notification. Part of the text is blacked out in red. The text reads "net-angel reblogged your post: asexual faggots sh t yourself challenge". End ID) And then there's some that will just straight up admit to hating certain groups and even harassing them. Others will admit to being fucking proud of their bigotry.

(Image ID: A screenshot of a twitter post from "sinboundhaibane" in dark mode. The text reads "i hate trans men, yes. if you understood the material realities of the situation, you would hate them too".)

(Image ID: A screenshot of a twitter post from an unknown Twitter user. The text reads "does anyone have edits they want views on i'm about to bully a bi/pan lesbian supporter 🏃‍♀️". End ID)

(Image ID: Two tweets from Twitter users "pipcrgrace" and "ssapphrodite". The text on the first tweet reads "just say you hate he him lesbians and move on...", the text on the second tweet has four variations of "i hate he/him lesbians" and "i ha" at the end. End ID).

(Image ID: A Tumblr post from user "jwjdhdjsksks". The text reads "The panphobes are out in full force today and I'm so proud". End ID). It should be obvious on why this is bad. Advocating for harassment or straight up violence, or telling someone to hurt themselves over their identity is NEVER a good thing no matter how you look at it. No buts, whats or ifs. And that's not even the end of this either. There's also some exclusionists who will restate the *same exact* rhetoric that Anti-LGBTQ+ people spew around. Here's a look.

TERF rhetoric (And invalidation of nonbinary identities)

(Image ID: Three tweets from three users with their names blocked by red, yellow and teal respectively. The screenshot is taken in light mode. The first tweet reads "I've spoken to many girls on here who did transition due to bullying/pressure. Lesbians are also attracted to girls." The second reads The two aren't mutually exclusive, either. Some trans men and trans women identify as lesbians, too.". The third tweet reads "Lesbians are female only.". End ID). Hmmm, I wonder where I've heard THIS before.

(Image ID: A Tumblr post from an individual who's username is pixeled out. The text reads "I really hate the Blue's Clues pride video. They are literally forcing their mogai shit on to little kids. Why do they have to feed kids bs like "nonbinary gender identities" and "pansexuality" on to children!? Why? (Just to clarify: I am not against teaching children about LGBT stuff, I am against teaching children bs)." End ID). Some will admit to straight up misgendering people as well. Again, seems familiar?

(Image ID: A Tumblr post from user "feminismnightmare". The text reads "Hi if you claim to be trans and tell me you're not dysphoric I'm going to use your biological pronouns". End ID). *More* TERF rhetoric (I would also like to point out that the saying "men are trash" is almost always a red flag, no matter the intent, due to it's high usage with TERFs).

(Image ID: A screenshot from an unknown Twitter user. The text reads "Lesbianism is understandable because men are trash. Gayness is fair because trash like trash. Bisexual = greedy. Trans = mental illness. All the others.. nonsense". End ID)

Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, a *LOT* of Exclusionists I've seen are also incredibly ableist and racist as well.

Many Exclusionists claim that some queer groups harm neurodivergent folks and POC, but... are we *really* sure about that?

(Image ID: A Twitter post from user "annadoescare". The screenshot is taken in dark mode. The text reads "i don't care about your mental illness. it's not my problem. stop making up these genders that embarrass the lgbt". End ID)

(Image ID: Two tweets from two users with usernames blocked out in red and yellow respectively. The screenshot is taken in dark mode. The first tweet reads "There are lesbians who like men. There are lesbians who are men. There are lesbians who are straight. There are lesbians who are bisexual. There are all this and more". The second tweet reads "This is why I hate autistics". End ID). ...Excuse me but what the actual FUCK. /neg

(Image ID: A Tumblr comment from user "trans-wojak". The text reads "being racist towards whites won't change slavery" with an analog winking emoji at the end. End ID). Straight up eugenics, TERFism or both? You decide! (I'm also slightly convinced this person has internalized ableism as well, but that's not really my say).

(Image ID: A Tumblr post from user "posttraumaticspacelesbian-blog". Part of text has been blocked out with red. The text reads "as a disabled womon i would like to point out that all disabled men should b k ed" End ID.)

Some will also compare some queer groups to arguably worse shit. Exhibit A:

(Image ID: A post from Twitter user "sinboundhaibane" in dark mode. The text reads "new poem: bi lesbianism is a fascist dogwhistle eat my shit". End ID). Exhibit B:

(Image ID: A post from Tumblr user "postmodern-baseball". The text reads "cops aren't class traitors, nonbinary lesbians are." End ID) And there's a SHITTON more too. But I could never do it justice in this post, especially with TERFs. Now, before you exclusionists come at me with "But NOT ALL OF US ARE LIKE THAT!" or "Inclusionists do this too!" First off, I am fully aware that inclusionists are guilty of some of these as well, which is why I don't use the inclusionist label. But that's besides the point, I don't care if you're not like the folks in this post. I don't care if not every exclusionist is like this. THIS is what Exclusionism promotes. THIS is what Exclusionism encourages. Exclusionism is always going to encourage harassment and infighting. No matter how civil you are, no matter how "chill" you are, no matter how "nice you are, it doesn't matter in the end. By excluding other queer folks from queer spaces, you are actively condoning harassment. No, I don't want to hear any excuses. Exclusionism has and always will be harmful to other queer communities. Still don't believe me? Here's some videos that show and explain the exact same thing, as well as some other educational videos thrown into the mix. Transmedicalism: An Investigation. Breaking my Silence on Kalvin Garrah: Part One, Part Two , Part Three. Inside a Cult: A Series about Gender Criticals. Why is Queer Discourse so Toxic?

Addressing my "Lesbophobia" - A Rant about Mspec Lesbian Exclusionism.

What are TERFs?

The problem with Radical Feminism.

And of course, here's my Mspec Lesbian Exclusionism analysis post.

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