#and was so utterly devestating

[sarah-cam]

"he was the best friend we ever had"

[stormofdefiance]

🤔 this boy ain’t right………

[gardenof--eden]

I want to be a teacher. Literally what the fuckles

[mercutiotakethewheel]

nona is fucking me all the way up on this reread i want to cry so bad but i cant bc im at work

[nellasbookplanet]

Book recs: black science fiction

As february and black history month nears its end, if you're a reader let's not forget to read and appreciate books by black authors the rest of the year as well! If you're a sci-fi fan like me, perhaps this list can help find some good books to sink your teeth into.

Bleak dystopias, high tech space adventures, alien monsters, alternate dimensions, mash-ups of sci-fi and fantasy - this list features a little bit of everything for genre fiction fans!

For more details on the books, continue under the readmore. Titles marked with * are my personal favorites. And as always, feel free to share your own recs in the notes!

If you want more book recs, check out my masterpost of rec lists!

Lagoon by Nnedi Okorafor

Something massive and alien crashes into the ocean off the coast of Nigeria. Three people, a marine biologist, a rapper, and a soldier, find themselves at the center of this presence, attempting to shepherd an alien ambassador as chaos spreads in the city. A strange novel that mixes the supernatural with the alien, shifts between many different POVs, and gives a one of a kind look at a possible first contact.

Nubia: The Awakening (Nubia series) by Omar Epps & Clarence A. Hayes

Young adult. Three teens living in the slums of an enviromentally ravaged New York find that something powerful is awakening within them. They’re all children of refugees of Nubia, a utopian African island nation that sank as the climate worsened, and realize now that their parents have been hiding aspects of their heritage from them. But as they come into their own, someone seeks to use their abilities to his own ends, against their own people.

The Scourge Between Stars by Ness Brown

Novella. After having failed at establishing a new colony, starship Calypso fights to make it back to Earth. Acting captain Jacklyn Albright is already struggling against the threats of interstellar space and impending starvation when the ship throws her a new danger: something is hiding on the ship, picking off her crew one by one in bloody, gruesome ways. A quick, excellent read if you want some good Alien vibes.

Dawn (Xenogenesis trilogy) by Octavia E. Butler*

After a devestating war leaves humanity on the brink of extinction, survivor Lilith finds herself waking up naked and alone in a strange room. She’s been rescued by the Oankali, who have arrived just in time to save the human race. But there’s a price to survival, and it might be humanity itself. Absolutely fucked up I love it I once had to drop the book mid read to stare at the ceiling and exclaim in horror at what was going on. Includes darker examinations of agency and consent, so enter with caution.

Midnight Robber by Nalo Hopkinson*

Utterly unique in world-building, story, and prose, Midnight Robber follows young Tan-Tan and her father, inhabitants of the Carribean-colonized planet of Toussaint. When her father commits a terrible crime, he’s exiled to a parallel version of the same planet, home to strange aliens and other human exiles. Tan-Tan, not wanting to lose her father, follows with him. Trapped on this new planet, he becomes her worst nightmare. Enter this book with caution, as it contains graphic child sexual abuse.

Rosewater (The Wormwood trilogy) by Tade Thompson

In Nigeria lies Rosewater, a city bordering on a strange, alien biodome. Its motives are unknown, but it’s having an undeniable effect on the surrounding life. Kaaro, former criminal and current psychic agent for the government, is one of the people changed by it. When other psychics like him begin getting killed, Kaaro must take it upon himself to find out the truth about the biodome and its intentions.

Do You Dream of Terra-Two? by Temi Oh

Young adult. A century ago, an astronomer discovered a possibly Earth-like planet. Now, a team of veteran astronauts and carefully chosen teenagers are preparing to embark on a twenty-three year trip to get there. But space is dangerous, and the team has no one to rely on but each other if - or when - something goes wrong. An introspective slowburn of a story, this focuses more on character work than action.

The Best of All Possible Worlds by Karen Lord

After the planet Sadira is left uninhabitable, its few survivors are forced to move to a new world. On Cygnus Beta, they work to rebuild their society alongside their distant relatives of the planet, while trying to preserve what remains of their culture. Focused less on hard science or action, The Best of All Possible Worlds is more about culture, romance and the ethics and practicalities of telepathy.

Mirage (Mirage duology) by Somaiya Daud

Young adult. Eighteen-year-old Amani lives on an isolated moon under the oppressive occupation of the Valthek empire. When Amani is abducted, she finds herself someplace wholly unexpected: the royal palace. As it turns out, she's nearly identical to the half-Valthek, and widely hated, princess Maram, who is in need of a body double. If Amani ever wants to make it back home or see her people freed from oppression, she will have to play her role as princess perfectly. While sci-fi, this one more has the vibe of a fantasy.

An Unkindness of Ghosts by Rivers Solomon

Life on the lower decks of the generation ship HSS Matilda is hard for Aster, an outcast even among outcasts, trying to survive in a system not dissimilar to the old antebellum South. The ship’s leaders have imposed harsh restrictions on their darker skinned people, using them as an oppressed work force as they travel toward their supposed Promised Land. But as Aster finds a link between the death of the ship’s sovereign and the suicide of her own mother, she realizes there may be a way off the ship.

Where It Rains in Color by Denise Crittendon

The planet Swazembi is a utopia of color and beauty, the most beautiful of all its citizens being the Rare Indigo. Lileala was just named Rare Indigo, but her strict yet pampered life gets upended when her beautiful skin is struck by a mysterious sickness, leaving it covered in scars and scabs. Meanwhile, voices start to whisper in Lileala's mind, bringing to the surface a past long forgotten involving her entire society.

Eacaping Exodus (Escaping Exodus duology) by Nicky Drayden

Seske is the heir to the leader of a clan living inside a gigantic, spacefaring beast, of which they frequently need to catch a new one to reside in as their presence slowly kills the beast from the inside. While I found the ending rushed with regards to plot and character, the worldbuilding is very fresh and the overall plot of survival and class struggle an interesting one. It’s also sapphic!

Chain-Gang All-Stars by Nana Kwame Adjei-Brenyah*

In a near future America, inmates on death row or with life sentences in private prisons can choose to participate in death matches for entertainment. If they survive long enough - a rare case indeed - they regain their freedom. Among these prisoners are Loretta Thurwar and Hamara "Hurricane Staxxx" Stacker, partners behind the scenes and close to the deadline of a possible release - if only they can survive for long enough. As the game continues to be stacked against them and protests mount outside, two women fight for love, freedom, and their own humanity. Chain-Gang All-Stars is bleak and unflinching as well as genuinely hopeful in its portrayal of a dark but all to real possible future.

Parable of the Sower (Earthseed duology) by Octavia E. Butler*

In a bleak future, Lauren Olamina lives with her family in a gated community, one of few still safe places in a time of chaos. When her community falls, Lauren is forced on the run. As she makes her way toward possible safety, she picks up a following of other refugees, and sows the seeds of a new ideology which may one day be the saviour of mankind. Very bleak and scarily realistic, Parable of the Sower will make you both fear for mankind and regain your hope for humanity.

Binti (Binti trilogy) by Nnedi Okorafor

Young adult novella. Binti is the first of the Himba people to be accepted into the prestigious Oomza University, the finest place of higher learning in all the galaxy. But as she embarks on her interstellar journey, the unthinkable happens: her ship is attacked by the terrifying Meduse, an alien race at war with Oomza University.

War Girls (War Girls duology) by Tochi Onyebuchi

In an enviromentally fraught future, the Nigerian civil war has flared back up, utilizing cybernetics and mechs to enhance its soldiers. Two sisters, by bond if not by blood, are separated and end up on differing sides of the struggle. Brutal and dark, with themes of dehumanization of soldiers through cybernetics that turn them into weapons, and the effect and trauma this has on them.

The Space Between Worlds (The Space Between Worlds duology) by Micaiah Johnson

Multiverse travel is finally possible, but there’s a catch: No one can visit a world where their counterpart is still alive. Enter Cara, whose parallel selves happen to be exceptionally good at dying. As such she has a very special job in traveling to these worlds, hoping to keep her position long enough to gain citizenship in the walled-off Wiley City, away from the wastes where she grew up. But her job is dangerous, especially when she gets on the tracks of a secret that threatens the entire multiverse. Really cool worldbuilding and characters, also featuring a sapphic lead!

The Fifth Season (The Broken Eart trilogy) by N.K. Jemisin*

In a world regularly torn apart by natural disasters, a big one finally strikes and society as we know it falls, leaving people floundering to survive in a post apocalyptic world, its secrets and past to be slowly revealed. We get to follow a mother as she races through this world to find and save her missing daughter. While mostly fantasy in genre, this series does have some sci-fi flavor, and is genuinely some of the best books I've ever read, please read them.

The Women Could Fly by Megan Giddings*

In an alternate version of our present, the witch hunt never ended. Women are constantly watched and expected to marry young so their husbands can keep an eye on them. When she was fourteen, Josephine's mother disappeared, leveling suspicions at both mother and daughter of possible witchcraft. Now, nearly a decade and a half later, Jo, in trying to finally accept her missing mother as dead, decides to follow up on a set of seemingly nonsensical instructions left in her will. Features a bisexual lead!

The Prey of Gods by Nicky Drayden

South African-set scifi featuring gods ancient and new, robots finding sentience, dik-diks, and a gay teen with mind control abilities. An ancient goddess seeks to return to her true power no matter how many humans she has to sacrifice to get there. A little bit all over the place but very creative and fresh.

The Summer Prince by Alaya Dawn Johnson*

Young adult. Young artist June Costa lives in Palmares Tres, a beautiful, matriarchal city relying heavily on tradition, one of which is the Summer King. The most recent Summer King is Enki, a bold boy and fellow artist. With him at her side, June seeks to finally find fame and recognition through her art, breaking through the generational divide of her home. But growing close to Enki is dangerous, because he, like all Summer Kings, is destined to die.

The Blood Trials (The Blood Gifted duology) by N.E. Davenport

After Ikenna's grandfather is assasinated, she is convinced that only a member of the Praetorian guard, elite soldiers, could’ve killed him. Seeking to uncover his killer, Ikenna enrolls in a dangerous trial to join the Praetorians which only a quarter of applicants survive. For Ikenna, the stakes are even higher, as she's hiding forbidden blood magic which could cost her her life. Mix of fantasy and sci-fi. While I didn’t super vibe with this one, I suspect fans of action packed romantasy will enjoy it.

Babel-17 by Samuel R. Delany

1960s classic. Rydra Wong is a space captain, linguist and poet who is set on learning to understand Babel-17, a language which is humanity's only clue at the enemy in an interstaller war. But Babel-17 is more than just a language, and studying it may change Rydra forever.

Pet (Pet duology) by Akwaeke Emezi

Young adult novella. Jam lives in a utopian future that has been freed of monsters and the systems which created and upheld them. But then she meets Pet, a dangerous creature claiming to be hunting a monster still among them, prepared to stop at nothing to find them. While I personally found the word-building in Pet lacking, it deftly handles dark subjects of what makes a human a monster.

Bonus AKA I haven’t read these yet but they seem really cool

Lion's Blood by Steven Barnes

Alternate history in which Africans colonized South America while vikings colonized the North. The vikings sell abducted Celts and Franks as slaves to the South, one of which is eleven-years-old Irish boy Aidan O'Dere, who was just bought by a Southern plantation owner.

The Sound of Stars by Alechia Dow

Young adult dystopia. Ellie lives in a future where humanity is under the control of the alien Ilori. All art is forbidden, but Ellie keeps a secret library; when one of her books disappears, she fears discovery and execution. M0Rr1S, born in a lab and raised to be emotionless, finds her library, and though he should deliver her for execution, he finds himself obsessed with human music. Together the two embark on a roadtrip which may save humanity.

Womb City by Tlotlo Tsamaase

Lelah lives in future Botswana, but despite money and fame she finds herself in an unhappy marriage, her body controlled via microchip by her husband. After burying the body of an accidental hit and run, Lelah's life gets worse when the ghost of her victim returns to enact bloody vengeance.

Orleans by Sherri L. Smith

Young adult. Fen de la Guerre, living in a quarantined Gulf Coast left devestated by storms and sickness, is forced on the run with a newborn after her tribe is attacked. Hoping to get the child to safety, Fen seeks to get to the other side of the wall, she teams up with a scientist from the outside the quarantine zone.

Everfair by Nisi Shawl

A neo-victorian alternate history, in which a part of Congo was kept safe from colonisation, becoming Everfair, a safe haven for both the people of Congo and former slaves returning from America. Here they must struggle to keep this home safe for them all.

The Splinter in the Sky by Kemi Ashing-Giwa

Space opera. Enitan just wants to live a quiet life in the aftermath of a failed war of conquest, but when her lover is killed and her sister kidnapped, she's forced to leave her plans behind to save her sister.

Honorary mentions AKA these didn't really work for me but maybe you guys will like them: The City We Became (Great Cities duology) by N.K. Jemisin, The Lesson by Cadwell Turnbull, The A.I. Who Loved Me by Alyssa Cole

[orkbutch]

I really love that the origin playthroughs add real, otherwise inaccessible context for what the origin characters are experiencing and how their world view works, its amazing. That said first experiencing the actual lived reality of Shar's wound on Shadowheart's hand was fucking gutting. Not a mere bad = pain shock collar, but traumatic visions of being abused as a child forced into her head. Your Goddess who you love and who you fear utterly holds a controller that allows her to trigger & retraumatise you at any moment, and she does it when she arbitrarily disapproves of your thoughts and feelings.

Not only is that obviously deeply controlling and traumatising itself, it also captures an experience I think is really interesting, and may be unique to Shadowheart's Lack Of Autonomy Trauma (tm); it turns her automatic internal self, not just her body or thoughts but her Feelings, into things that she fears, and things that betray her. Who she is becomes a threat that she must resist expressing or even experiencing at all, because Shar may notice and punish her for it.

This is why I think of Shadowheart as most likely to be highly dissociative (on top of yknow, the lost time, the focus on oblivion, the routine abuse and the alienation from herself), because she can't really retreat inwards. Even the internal world is unsafe and needs to be escaped sometimes. When thats the case, you either sedate yourself (which I hc that she probably does too often) or you fracture, and numb out.

I think this is why Shadowheart seems to be the least obviously angry of all the companions toward her abuser; anger, even secretly held within to fester into resentment and rage, could not be abided. It had to be totally muted. When she turns from Shar, she is not angry but fearful, regretful, sad, confused. Even when she's free from the wound, she is more mournful than angry. She is ashamed, and deeply devestated. But she doesn't express rage. That emotion is still locked away for her.

I wonder how this impacts Shadowheart's self-trust. Her ability to believe herself, to trust her thoughts and emotions are real. I speculate that Shadowheart internally probably would dismiss lots of thoughts, feelings and desires she had as her being stubborn and disobedient. They were punished as such since she was a child, why wouldn't she believe it? It's difficult to live like that. Nothing feels certain. Nothing but something undeniably bigger than yourself, like faith or a God or the abuser that has put themself there.

When I think about that and the wound on her hand, and Shar's utter cruelty... I'm just floored by how brave Shadowheart is. In most cases, if you've befriended Shadowheart and been nice enough, she will choose to save The Nightsong without any input from you. She is so, so brave. She wants to fight for what feels right, for freedom, and for herself, even when she knows what Shar can and does do to her. She faces down the wrath of a capricious Goddess she's personally angered, and handles it with unsettling grace. Shes so used to pain, and making herself nonexistent, but she still fights for herself. I just love her so much

[polarspaz]

Knowing Too Much AU

While Tim was the first of the Bat-family to learn of their eldritch fate, Cassandra was the unfortunate second.

Despite Tim's best efforts to keep his family in the dark, he was unaware that Cassandra had been secretly keeping a close eye on him. She knew something was bothering him, something so heavy that he was unwilling to let anyone ease his burden.

If she wanted to help him she would have to be sneaky about. Sneaking into his room and reading his research has been surprisingly easy, but what found was anything but.

In the beginning, she had zero inkling on what he was researching. The books and papers he collected were way too advanced for her, but she was stubborn. She wanted to prove to him that she could do this, so she studiously studied. While she didn't quite grasp the depth of what she learning, it still affected her, and she learned her purpose.

Tim has no idea that Cassandra is doing this, despite his Eldritch state of being as Cassandra's main power is that of Concealment. If she doesn't want to be found or suspected, she never will be seen or thought of again until she desires it.

So when she comes to him one day and shows him her Eldritch form, he both utterly horrified and confused. She admits to him that she is afraid, that she's not sure what to do, and Tim is devested. He failed her.

However it is not all doom and gloom. With Cassandra's help, Tim is able to hide crazy stuff from the rest of the family. The two also find solace with their current state of being, and Tim can't help but feel relieved that he is not the only one going through this nightmare.

In fact, Cassandra is handling the whole thing WAY better than him and is already way more proficient and skilled with her powers than he is.

[obriengf]

velvet touches, indelible scars - w/dylan

he made you smile, and that's all it took for you to fall so hopelessly devoted to him. how could you not? every laugh was a breath of fresh air that you craved to breathe, derived of oxygen until he unknowingly allowed you to inhale all the good that kept you going. it was addictive, a necessity, the desire to be close to him made your heart ache and scream and thump - and for a moment, you would feel your chest tighten, but it was simply because he left you gasping on held breath over his tenderness and gentle eyes. his words were always soft, even when they held such mischief and a boyish cheekiness that made his cheeks dimple delectably. they made you feel good, always, without fault, as if you could believe any nonsense that fell so beautifully from those lips. and trust me, you would. over and over again.

his friendship was a staple that kept you clinging. and even though he would never let go, it still kelp you holding on for dear life, like it was a permanence in your life; something you didn't want to lose, you simply couldn't. and yet, the day you nearly did left a shadow of 'what ifs' that still clouded your dreams and captured your heart in an anxious strangle.

he had you mesmerised - probably without realising, not completely, at least. every single word, every sound, had you hanging and teetering on the edge of a cliff for no sane reason. you just loved him, is all. your eyes gleamed as they showed you listening so intently to his stories, encapsulated in the tales that held such domesticity, but he knew that you would like them. you would understand. you always had gotten him, from the first day that you met. it's what drew him to you.

you grinned widely, your shoulder pressed into the cushioning of his couch as you sat sideways, facing the man next to you. his position was mirrored perfectly- in sync, such comfortability. his elbow had dug in at the top and his cheek balanced on the soft curl of his fist, face turning slightly as he released a heavy laugh straight from the belly, embodied by pureness and authenticity.

it wasn't until your eyes fell slightly, your focus leaving the handsome creases of happiness that pulled at his eyes, and instead landing on the small mark that made you feel as if time was only borrowed. your smile dropped with your gaze, effortlessly, too quick for you to handle. and before you knew it, your fingers reached out.

his laughter stopped as he felt such softness - movements made solely to prevent damage, an approach to handle with care. he watched as your finger danced lightly over the side of his nose, only to pull back suddenly as if you were to touch an open flame. he frowned.

"what is it?" his voice was quiet, barely heard if you hadn't been so close. he was scared that if he spoke any louder then he would break the bubble you have found yourselves buried deep within.

your reply was just as hushed, barely breathed out as a gentle huff left your lips, "just this little guy."

dylan knew that you meant and it pained him that after all these years, all the time you had to move past it, and it still affected you in such a way that it left your poor soul with a broken heart.

he hummed, "what about it?" he was moving now as his hand covered yours, holding it against the side of his face. he could feel you relax instantly but your thumb dragged over the scar as a reminder that it lived. and that after the accident, he did too.

" i nearly lost you." there was a crack in your voice - barely present, just a minor bump, a possible cough to someone who wasn't paying as much attention. but dylan was too engrossed with everything that made you, you, that he couldn't help but feel the fracture as it settled within his chest.

his scar was an in-built memory, a permanent token, an unwanted souvenir. it reminded him of a time where he felt utterly useless and devestated. it followed him whereever he went, but it was a part of him now. and it represented how he made it out of the woods and back into the daylight.

"hey, look at me." he beckoned, watching as you were getting lost in the moments of seeing him in his hospital bed, absolutely destroyed. it was the stuff of nightmares, simply disturbing with just how fluently you could fall in and out of that memory as if you were back in that sterile white room with the beeping machines and your broken friend. dylan pressed again, "sweetheart, look at me. i'm here, i'm alive. we're okay, i promise you."

his coo was a saviour, like all the times before. you were stuck in a foggy daze, and he was the lighthouse that guided you safely to the shore. you awoke from a terrible dream and dylan still had his hand entagled with yours, and matching tears that threatened to fall from wet lash lines. your breathing stopped again - settling in your chest as words weighed on your tongue. you couldn't breathe until you felt his lips brush over your knuckles, making your words jump with emotion, "i will never let you feel pain again, if it's the last thing i do."

dylan's lips lifted, curled, gathered into a grin that felt like much needed rebirth.

he knew in that moment that he loved you, really loved you. like he did when he saw you in that hospital room all those years ago - how love shone so brightly from your eyes despite their devastated sadness. he was a man that was reduced to nothing but you never left his side. you fell in love with him at his lowest and because of you, he raised valiently from the ashes.

you would always be by his side, as he yours, never daring to look back for a a single second - especially, not when it came to that damn smile, that got you every single time.

[brekkie-e]

Nothing could have prepared me for the devestation that was convincing my mother to read ASOIAF, and having her turn around and try to convince me Sansa was a blonde. She was at the end of A Dance with Dragons. The end of it. Sansa isn't even ginger in A Dance with Dragons. She could have said brunette, and I wouldn't have known she was picturing my girl so utterly incorrect. But no.

This was a weird and disappointing way to learn my mom skims when she reads. How do you go through five books of someone's hair color being a defining part of their character and not even pick up on what said hair color is?

[kingsmoot]

I don't know if you ever discussed this but how do you think Cat(not lady SH) would have reacted to RLJ if she survived red wedding or it never happened? I don't know if she would be happy that ned never loved anyone romantically or upset that he committed treason and risked their children's life. Plus her emotions regarding jon must be one hell of a rollercoaster

hmmmm this is a v interesting question and one that i'm not the best equipped to answer rn as i'm falling asleep but my instinct here, is... like if i'm trying to put myself in cat's shoes. idk if the lie is any less devestating tbh?

like. the prev anon just brought up how cat can be so unexpectedly flexible with characters like brienne and mya where she gets to know them in a deep and sincere way and accomodates for their personhood despite their societal wrongness. but i'm just not sure i could see her reaching that kind of flexibility with jon. maybe i'm thinking of like, the grief stricken cat that we know going into the red wedding and this answer would be totally different for pre-agot cat.

it's not that i think cat and jon will never reconcile i do #believe that cat will be reunited with her weirwood children, jon and theon, the estranged outsiders who ate at her table and played with her children and either betrayed her family utterly or were themselves a paragon of betrayal.

but i'm thinking, like. i don't think cat would not understand why ned could not tell her about jon's parentage. i think she would understand immediately why he did it. i think she might even respect the lengths to which he went to ensure that his sister's only child was kept safe from harm. (i've mentioned before how my favorite nedcat thing is that both of them extend an understanding to cersei for the depth of the love she bears for her own children despite them being incest abomination afronts to the old gods and the new, so i think it would be very simple for cat to extend that same compassion to rhaegar and lyanna in this instance.) but none of that changes like, the enormity of the lie, y'know?

you can know your husband who you love deeply and who is the rock upon your life was built lied to you. every day. for fifteen years. saw the grief and torment and hurt it caused you. saw how it caused you to treat the child brought into your home. saw how it disgraced you socially. you can know why he did all that and you can still never forgive him for it.

cat says in her first agot chapter that jon is the one thing she could never forgive ned for. i think "i risked the safety of our entire house, all of our children, and myself by keeping up an elaborate lie for a decade and a half" is not any less difficult to forgive than "i knocked up a RANDOM WOMAN while you were pregnant with our firstborn child and will now be making her mistake baby your problem for the rest of both our lives".

idk i'm sleepy high and rambling idt this response is worth much. i think in agot when cat meets mya she feels deep and sincere guilt over her parting words to jon. i think she feels guilt for how she treated him in general, because if she can see the humanity in one bastard child what if she could have seen the humanity in jon all along? but i think if she did find out the truth of jon's parentage it sort of. wouldn't stop him from being just like. a walking talking granite plinth upon which is carved the enormity of eddard stark's lie to her. and yes he lied to save the child of a sister he loved fiercely from a brother he grew to no longer recognize. but he still. lied.

[angstintensifer]

Huntlynn headcanons.

Hunter was absolutely smitten with Ashlynn since day one and always tries his best to impress her. He will go out of his way to look good on dates and especially on outings like a dance or something important but his looks don’t matter to Ashlynn, she always adored him for who he is.

The enchanted forest is their safe place and they still go on dates there even after their relationship was public.

In the beginning Ashlynn tried to push Hunter away because of their destinies and her fear of what would happen if people found out a royal and a rebel developed romantic feelings for each other.

She went back to him later that day and changed her mind because she also believed their love was worth fighting for.

Hunter is known to make occasional surprise visits at the glass slipper during Ashlynn’s work hours when he’s bored or because he misses her, he also wants to check up on her and make sure she's not overworking herself.

When their relationship was a secret Hunter would passed messages to Ashlynn via bird to be romantic.

Hunter can always tell when something is bothering Ashlynn, if she's having a bad day he can sense it and will do everything in power to either comfort her or cheer her up.

Hunter was hard to read at first for Ashlynn, because he was so used to hiding himself in front of his family and friends but eventually Ashlynn could read him easier than anyone else could.

During their true hearts day breakup, they were both miserable for those hours apart. Ashlynn could barely stop crying but held most of it in to convince herself it was the right thing to do (it wasn’t)

Hunter was utterly devested and had a big breakdown the second he was alone with his feelings.

Ashlynn wanted to avoid the dance because she knew she would see him at it, but went because Briar convinced her. Hunter went because he felt at least seeing her around would make him feel better even if she didn't want to be with him anymore.

They were constantly glancing at other when their relationship was a secret, it was a bit obvious they were together. (Cedar also said this in her webepisode so)

Despite being raised to be tough huntsman, Hunter is very gentle with Ashlynn when it comes to physical affection. He adores, hugs and cuddles. He will find any excuse to hold her hands.

Hunter doesn’t find shoes interesting but he could listen to Ashlynn talk about them for hours, because he loves listening to her talk and watching her get so excited.

Hunter taught her some archery and they often go on archery dates together, it gets a bit competitive but they have a lot of fun.

In return, Ashlynn tried to teach Hunter to dance because she’s good at it and the first time ended badly with him tripping and getting slightly injured, but she patched him up herself.

They both dreaded the legacy day. Ashlynn attempted to break up with Hunter on legacy day to spare them any possible future pain but they both decided they would face the day together instead of giving up on what they have, even if it was secret.

Hunter doesn’t like to give up on things and while he understood every single one of Ashlynn’s doubts and concerns, he wanted her to know he would fight for her whether she choose to stay with him or not. He always have a choice if she wanted out.

Hunter was the first say “I love you.” He said it on legacy day before the ceremony. And Ashlynn was in shock to hear it and didn’t reciprocate the words until after the ceremony in regret that she signed the book after what Raven did.

But Hunter knew she felt the same way.

It’s implied in the books that Ashlynn gave or made Hunters leather bracelet, so I like to think she did.

Hunter is very good at doing Ashlynn’s hair and likes to braid it or just brush it for her.

[evilcatgirlwizard]

man I wanna write an au of warriors where the prophesy about kin of your kin rival the stars etc etc and people just fucking freak out. Thunderclan has to fight off all the other clans just to *survive*. They all interpreted it as firestar's kin are gonna be so strong they're gonna destroy Starclan. So they have to destroy every Firestar relative Now or Else.

In one of these Many Many Battles, Leafpool is tending to Crowfeather in secret cuz he got hurt Extremely Bad and was gonna die if she didn't do anything because Windclan had left him behind. He's like wow women do love me huh. Leafpool ends up bringing him to Thunderclan and they Hesitantly accept this guy cuz well Leafpool said he was cool and was kicked out for being pro-Thunderclan and they REALLY REALLY need the warriors.

Leafpool and Squirrelflight still eventually have to leave, and the clan is genuinely fucking devestated. They all assume Crowfeather lured them into a trap, so he gets Executed. They can't spare the time to feed him, man. They just can't. They have to train the apprentices and hunt and patrol borders... He's a liability.

Though, of course, Leafpool and Squirrelflight come back with kits. Four, four kits. Lionkit, Jaykit, Hollykit, and Breezekit. Breezekit looks suspiciously like a certain suddenly dead tomcat, but no one thinks too hard because thank Starclan these two are alive. Squirrelflight says theyre hers, she just left and had them in secret with Leafpool at her side just in case clan camp was attacked. So sorry for the worry. No One Cares they're just so glad a capable warrior and Leafpool are *back*.

Leaf asks where Crowfeather is. Everyone else looks at each other weirdly. Firestar, haggard and losing a life every other moon, is the one who tells her. Leafpool is *appalled*. They... they would just ***kill him***? Without even waiting? She knows times aren't good, but he was an innocent cat. He was her... friend. She saved his life and her father took it away. Leafpool is so utterly destroyed by this, two days later she takes Breezekit and Hollykit and runs off to Windclan. Sure, Windclan may be rallying against her father, but she's a medicine cat. And these kits look like Crowfeather. She can pass them off as Crowfeather's kits with a loner. Or something. Her excuses don't matter because Windclan accepts her. Not... not easily, but Onestar isn't so far gone down the Thunderclan hate train that he won't allow a medicine cat (notably celibate) return two Windclan kits to Windclan. And stay, to heal more Windclan cats. This is fine.

Proper all-clan gatherings stopped happening the moon the war on Thunderclan began. The clans are so caught up in destroying Thunderclan that they can't even leave their territory without being viciously attacked. The three other clans do meet, though, just while keeping Thunderclan in their place, stagnating and hopefully dying. Leafpool ends up being asked to join one of these gatherings, and ends up getting pestered by everyone. What happened to Crowfeather, what did Thunderclan do to him and you that even you, their medicine cat, left? How far have they fallen?

Leafpool, still upset, doesn't help her kin. She speaks clearly and openly, and lies out of her teeth to protect her young. Crowfeather was captured at the end of a battle between Thunder and Wind, and Leafpool was tasked with healing him. Eventually she broke him out however, and helped him flee Thunderclan. In the wilderness, he met and befriended... Pond, an orange she-cat who kept him safe and happy. He and her had... four kits. She says his other two kits, Jay and Lion, are still in Thunderclan. Because they tracked Crowfeather down, killed him and Pond, and took his kits, intending to train them to destroy their father's clan. Leafpool hated this, and hated patching up murderers, so she took as many kits as she could carry--only two, sadly--and fled. She now stands as a medicine cat, who took a vow of chastity by the way she may be Firestar's kin but she doesn't have any powers and she's never had kits because she's a medicine cat ahhahahaha, rebelling against Thunderclan. And the other three clans are like oh hell yeah we're justified. And Leafpool is like wait. I don't want my dad and family destroyed. Oh fuck and shit I made a mistake in my post-Crowfeather Being Murdered Anger. Oh No.

it'd be this harrowing story of Lion and Jay having to come into their powers much sooner to even keep Thunderclan *alive*, and of Holly and Breeze (I just like him), *also* developing powers and being like hm. What does this say about me as a cat. maybe someone is lying. While Leafpool is subtly sabotaging the effort to kill her family and trying to keep secrets and mourning the life she could have had if she hadn't been so stupid and reckless.

[melonteee]

you say you have a "hope that sanji dies" cuz you love tragedy - do you have any specifc thoughts or plot hopes to expand on that?

disclaimer: i mean this in just all good fun speculation or wishes cuz honestly we aint oda so who knows bruh 🤷‍♀️

like, the way i see it, him dying wouldnt just make wci 1000 times worse in retrospect, but i cant see it not utterly devestating luffy considering... well, luffys everything.he literally says he cant become pirate king without sanji! i mean, i guess oda could play it off as a honorable battle death or 'dying as yourself' but it could also go the 'you cant save everyone' route? kinda like ace, but a little to the left?

and if you bring in the possible discord amongst the crew of the death pack with zoro, it just creates even more problems beyond 'oh fuck whos gunna feed luffy'. we're talking water seven usopp leaves levels of discord

(....also why do sanji girlies like hurting him so? pudding, i have more in common with u than i thought)

My biggest thing with it is... Sanji's thing is worth, right? He thinks if he mutates and loses his emotions, Luffy won't want him, so he may as well die.

But, with the death pact he made with Zoro, what about ZORO.

Zoro hasn't said it out loud, but one of his biggest fears is obviously losing a crewmate - it's losing a loved one. He never wants to lose someone like he lost Kuina again. This feels very obvious to me, and it's why he fights to the extent he does.

So? I want Sanji to mutate, and I want the death pact to happen, because I want Zoro to hit a wall.

To never lose again, to be the greatest swordsman, WHAT must he sacrifice? To carry out a promise to his friends, to both Kuina AND Sanji, is this really worth it? Is this the right thing to do to reach his goals, and to go through with a promise?

Is it worth taking out a crewmate?

And then of course, for Sanji, if Zoro says he can't do it, he just can't kill Sanji, imagine how much that will make Sanji realise...he IS valuable, he HAS worth, no matter HOW he ends up. So what if he turns into a cold, unfeeling soldier? That's still Sanji, he's still somewhere in there, and Zoro dropping his sword would truly make Sanji realise that.

OR it can go the other way, and the death pact will go through - where Sanji can die happy, and Zoro can fulfill his friend's promise.

This is why it's so interesting that the death pact is SPECIFICALLY between those two. Because I'm not saying Zoro values Sanji over any other Strawhat - of course he doesn't. What I'm saying is, Sanji's situation is so specific to his being and emotions, and he KNOWS Zoro takes promises to heart.

I'm so so so SO interested to see if this death pact will EVER go through. There's so much that could happen with it, so even if Sanji dies or not? Fingers crossed!

[aikoiya]

LoZ: TotK - Meeting One's Match (Overall Story Summary) Part 2

TW: Mentions of past rape & child enslavement (though, it's only mentioned as past trauma & is acknowledged as disgusting); panic attack; mention of death of loved ones, multiple, both canon & non-canon; mentions of child abandonment; mention of concubines, both male & female; mild violence; intrusive thoughts & pseudo-possession; mentioned child sacrifice & implied torture of a minor, very bad, horrible stuff; possible others that I can't think of off the top of my head rn.

Just because they are in the story does not mean that I condone it.

And, I am very open to criticism so long as it is constructive in nature & presented politely. In fact, I encourage it!

Before reading, I'd recommend going here first: Nemma Masamuna Profile & Personality

MOM Part 1 & MOM Part 2.

I recommend that you read Part 1 first.

And, for the rest of my Meeting One's Match stuff, go to my LoZ My Fanfic Masterlist.

---

Let's start back where we left off, shall we?

Anyway, where was I?

Oh, yes! Nemma was kidnapped!

---

Now, I think that I'm going to make Nemma's capture a result of Kōme & Kotake's attempts to be rid of her as they don't appreciate how "soft" Ganondorf is becoming because of her. As in, they heard Rauru's attempt to persuade Nemma & then later informed him of her routines, which enables one of his Sheikah Warriors to kidnap her.

I think I'll make it Nemma's father, Masashai, who steals her away, just to really drum up the drama. He's one of Rauru's best & he even offered to do it himself as she was his spawn. Which, the use of such a word to describe one's own offspring had caused Rauru's eyes to narrow as he'd never speak of his own daughter (now 3 years old) thusly. But he was nothing if not strategic, so he'd let it slide for now.

(The toddler princess was hidden far away, outside of the Demon King's reach for now. Rauru was doing this for her.)

Masashai saw Nemma's dalliances with his king's enemy & his queen's killer to be deeply shaming & he wished to correct the girl's behavior.

At the same time, Rauru would recognize in Nemma the complete absence of a desire for power that wasn't something that she, herself, had earned, as well as the qualities of a true & wise ruler & a noble, honorable warrior. As such, he wouldn't kill her, instead choosing to seal her away.

Though, before that, he'd try to convince her to his side once more.

I don't know how the conversation would go, but by the end, she needs to be sealed, so obviously not well.

Either way, Masashai had placed Fuda on her that sealed her magic away, devested her of her lockpicking tools, & had made sure that her forearms were bound as well. This kept Nemma from being able to escape.

Perhaps, Masashai is standing guard & utterly ignoring her. Nemma tries to ignore him in return, but at some point, she just can't believe how little he seems to care.

Then again, no matter what she'd say, I see Masashai as the sort to value his job & his duty to the Hyrule Royal Family far & above more than he could ever value her, so he'd simply ignore her as irrelevant.

Which Rauru would very much notice. At least if there was an aura of tensness about the Sheikah, it'd indicate that he in some way wished to address her but couldn't because of his duty. However, all Rauru could sense from him was stern, if relaxed & calm, resolve. Which did not bode well...

While the young lady was being difficult, she was still the man's daughter. The Zonai King loved his own precious daughter with all his heart, so seeing a man be so utterly & completely uninterested in his own offspring & unmoved by her plight, now confined in a cell.

Well, it made his hackles rise!

Despite being one of his best, he'd have to reevaluate the man's employment. Rauru wasn't sure he wanted someone who obviously didn't value his own flesh & blood near his little girl. As he couldn't be sure that he'd protect her to the bitter end. Or if he'd be terribly pragmatic & see the parent as more important than the child due to them being able to just make more. That was perfectly fine when it came to animals, but this was su preciosa hija & if his bebita died because of this man, destrozaría al bastardo, miembro por miembro! (He would rip the bastard apart, limb from limb!)

Oh, he'd give the Sheikah man the chance to explain himself, but he'd better be careful about what he says.

—

Anyway, upon realizing what happened, Ganondorf loses his absolute damn mind.

He keeps the Namikaze no Odori & Fa'gáron'jï Bojaqàr'è on him at all times.

It's the perfect chance to hammer it into the Gerudo King's head that while Rauru was arrogant for allowing Ganondorf close (& not heeding Zelda's warnings), Ganondorf was also arrogant for killing Sonia & not taking seriously the threat of retribution or that his insatiable thirst for power might come back to bite him in the ass.

—

In the beginning, all the vaien were with Ganondorf in his attempts to siege Hyrule to rescue their beloved queen. However, too many are killed. Ganondorf tries to rallies them again. Then again. But with each successive battle, they lose more & more. Until they refuse & mourn the loss of their queen.

Here, part of why he began to subjugate the Gerudo in the other Gerudo settlements was in a desperate bid to gain more warriors with which to fight Hyrule, hoping that with more firepower he could manage to save Qamàhfu (his beautiful moon). He would then use his dark magic to control them & make them fight. Which, to be honest, Nemma would likely not be okay with as it violates the promise he made to not enslave people, but he more so saw it as indentured servitude as he was only planning on keeping them under his sway until after he'd gotten his wife back. Slavery was meant for life. Servitude was simply paying back what was owed until it was no longer owed.

Anyway, some of the only ones who didn't back down was Ayamay & Nemma's friends, Tïsàla & Nīra, who all ended up being a surprising source of comfort & support for the Gerudo King. Which Ganondorf finds himself very much appreciating. Nīra had even offered to fight too as Nemma had been teaching her Kiridō, including Kirijutsu, before the Sheikah had been kidnapped & Ayamay had continued to train her afterwards. She became the first Gerudo to really use knives in battle.

Admittedly, he'd been contemplating killing Tïsàla & Nīra, as he hadn't liked how much time the women were spending with his wife.

Now, he knew that there was absolutely nothing going on between them. Not only were the three of them all very, extremely straight, but he'd often heard the two privately calling Nemma Vàlayàrï, or tiny sister. Which, the use of yàrï instead of yà specifically indicates an almost exclusively familial or platonic affection.

It was simply that he was a jealous person by nature.

But, the determination that the yaidja (guardswoman) & pàrmàgsta (cook or chef) showcased for rescuing his wife was admirable. So, he supposed that he would allow them to live. Besides, it'd make his beloved sad & after losing her now, he couldn't bear to be the one to cause any more distress even if she never learned of his involvement.

(The invasive thoughts had taken on a strange tone. One of possession that he was familiar with as he, himself, was quite possessive, but absent of the genuine love, care, worry, or affectionate frustration that often laced his own heart when discussing his wife. These whispers were that of someone who was angry that his favorite toy was taken from him & this made Ganondorf worry that this was how he secretly felt for his beloved moon. The idea of seeing her as nothing more than a prize or something to use for his own pleasure, something he owned, but that he wasn't owned by her in return. It sickened him. Reciprocal ownership was extremely important in Gerudo romantic relationships. He should be as much hers as she was his.)

Ganondorf was also surprised by Ayamay's fearsome continence in battle. He'd expected the woman to leave it all to the younger generation, but she'd stepped up, having appeared in a Sheikah battle suit & kimono with a coiled Jōhyō pinned to her hip, a Naginata in her hands (which hit him rather hard as he knew it to be the chosen weapon of Sheikah women defending their homes & families), & a look of absolute murder in her eyes.

While Ayamay never had anything personal against Rauru & she even sympathized with him for his loss, he also took her grandbaby & that's crossing a line with her.

She'd taken out quite a few of her fellow Sheikah.

"If there's one thing my grandbaby's right about. It's the erosion of our warrior culture. They've gotten too reliant upon the Zonai's technology."

Likewise, Ganondorf refused to let go & he became fueled by his own hatred that was amplified by Demise's curse, those very whispers that took over his mind more & more with each day that he went without removing the stone.

As well as the sound of Nemma's heartbeat through the Gossip Stone hanging from his ear.

---

At some point, I want Ganondorf & Ayamay to become suspicious of how upbeat & unworried for Nemma his àdï'vàman (adoptive mothers) were. Ayamay begins to spy on them, using an old Gossip Stone infused with Recall magic to record their conversations.

It took some time before she finally heard them speak of their dealings with Rauru.

Ayamay was heartbroken for Ganondorf, but she couldn't say that she didn't expect it.

That night, she finally revealed the 2 witches' many attempts at her & Nemma's lives before playing what she recorded for him.

The man's face had gone blank. He very quietly told her to leave the stone with him & leave.

---

Ganondorf removed the Secret Stone once more, the mental effort with which to remove it this time being almost unbearable, & spent the rest of the night just processing everything.

In many ways, he was afraid of his vàman. They'd... he knew that they weren't... good to him... Knew that how they'd raised him wasn't... normal...

But, his whole life, they'd told him that they did those things to make him strong, a great king. Powerful. And he'd been so sure that they were right.

But, Nemma was nearly his equal & Ayamay had never done to her the things that his vàman did to him. If she'd been a Gerudo vai & still trained the same or had even simply taken on the blessing of Talthïrï to become a vae, she'd likely have beaten him soundly multiple times. Yet, despite this Nemma also never had to dally in Gánō (black magic) for the sake of her power either. She was powerful by her own merit, training, dedication, & perseverance & didn't need to be needlessly cruel to assert dominion over those around her. Even on him. Stern, but never needlessly cruel to those who didn't deserve it.

So, what had even been the point? Why did they-?

He always thought that they did these things for him. For his glory! For his destiny as king of all Hyrule! They had been the ones to teach him about Nīkôzeto'reqra! (An ancient Gerudo philosophy that is no longer practiced. It's basically China's 'Mandate of Heaven' philosophy or the idea of 'Might Makes Right.' Basically, it says that the one who is stronger, the one who wins, is right & correct & righteous. That they have a divine right to do whatever they so desire & treat those weaker than them however they wished. It is very much discouraged by the general Gerudo populous today, but Kōme & Kotake live & die by this philosophy, always have in every incarnation, & they made sure that Gdorf lived & breathed it as well.)

If it were truly all about power, then why take from him the most powerful & loyal person in his life?! Why take away one that gave him such satisfaction & contentment?!?

Why did they betray him!?!?

For the first time since that night with the nightmare, Ganondorf cried. It was quiet & he didn't even realize it was happening as he trembled & panted out broken gasps of heartache.

A glint caught his eye & he saw the weapons he'd had specially made with his vàman'jï (mothers', as in belonging to them) names on them.

Then, his sorrow was replaced with bitterness & fury & hatred.

If they thought that they could give away that which was his, & only his, then they would rue having taught him no mercy!

Even without the Secret Stone in place, his eyes began to glow bloody red & black crept over his schlera like dark tendrils. As if on instinct, he reached for the stone once more.

---

When Ganondorf confronts his àdï'vàman, Ayamay, Nīra, & Tïsàla are there with him. He found it odd how their silent support comforted him even as he wore the stone.

I'm not entirely sure how this goes.

Though, I want Kōme & Kotake to assert their authority over him as his mothers. To say that he is as powerful as he is because of them. And yada yada.

But, at some point, I want Kōme to snap at him & call him voevï (boy) & he flinches away instinctively, but the presence of Ayamay's hand on his arm (even as her skin quietly sizzles at the contact) causes him to straighten & stand firm. (Since Nemma had been stricken by his Miasma, Ayamay had been experimenting with ways to make clothes that could resist it. She is wearing a pair of gloves that do so in this scene. However, they are still not complete, so some is still getting through. She had done so using the odd clumps of dark mass that Nemma kept in a box covered with Fuda featuring strange Fūinjutsu that Ayamay couldn't comprehend.)

Like, I definitely think that Demise's curse influences Ganondorf to a degree, but I also think that he's as bad as he is as a result of both nature & nurture.

I still want Ganondorf to be a very bad man who does bad things of his own accord, but I also want it to be a complicated situation. That, yes, he's bad, even a monster, but it's partly because he was intentionally raised that way.

Either way, in the end of it all, Ganondorf has the witches marched out amongst the tents of the Gerudo settlement & announces to the Gerudo that Kōme & Kotake conspired with Rauru to take their Vàmàh Vai'àtta (Moon Queen) from them.

There was first stunned silence, then a deafening cacophony of ragefilled shouts.

Ganondorf asked them what their punishment would be & their answer was a resounding "DEATH!"

His brow furrowed with minute sadness before scrunching with certainty & resolve.

The king handed out his Shōki (瘴気, Miasma) Weaponry to his subjects & basically said "have at them."

(Again, he's still awful. Still merciless.)

Despite everything they'd done, he couldn't bring himself to watch.

Then, in a moment of fury, they break free to become Twinrova & scream out that he would be nothing without them. A battle ensues & through it, they reveal quite a lot.

Did he think that he'd be anywhere near as powerful had he stayed with that weakling vai that birthed him?? She'd have made him soft! That he was lucky they'd been rid of her & her boy toy!

As they bellow, Ganondorf is striken silent for a moment, unable to process. Yes, he'd always known that, logically, they weren't his mothers by blood, but they'd told him that he'd been abandoned. That they'd found him alone in the desert.

But they'd lied. Just like they'd lied about everything else in his life.

The battle commences, but the results are the same. The women who raised him dead at his feet, the Fa'gáron'jï Bojaqàr'è, Namikaze no Odori, & the various Shōki Weaponry that he'd provided his subjects with, stained with their blood.

Once he'd returned to his room, as he took everything in, he suddenly couldn't breathe.

The tips of his fingers tingled & he felt nauseous. Why were his thoughts so loud, crowding his head? Was this a heart attack?! How could something like this happen?? Shouldn't his magic protect him from that!?

Panick sets in & he doesn't know what to do.

He eventually ends up passing out. His rest fitful.

---

Ganondorf later learns from Kotake's journal that they'd believed him to be the mortal vessel of their master. Which turned out to be some... ancient arch-demon only referred to by titles, the most frequent being the Bringer of Demise whose hatred & resentment for the gods would incarnate & wrought havoc to the Golden Land of the legendary Hyrule every myriennia or so. (A myriennia being a period of 10,000 years.)

The Hyrule of legend said to have been little more than myth due to its contradicting stories.

The Twinrova had actively sought him out to take him from his mother, a Gerudo from Ealiyah Town in the Highlands, & had killed both her & her Ovelian (those without pointed ears, so just regular humans) husband in the dead of night.

The Ealiyan Gerudo were known for allowing men into their settlement, many even living amongst them. He wondered how he would've turned out had they never stolen him away...

Further in, he learns that his parents had tried desperately to protect him, but were slain for their troubles. He also doesn't know what to think of how Kotake noted a small vaivï'jï (girl's) bed in the nursery & several toys too advanced for an infant. Though neither Kōme nor Kotake found a vaivï (girl) there, they suspected that one might be hiding. He could have a vàla (sister)?

Vah Amàhrta! W-was his King Name even his King Name? What else had they lied to him about?? Who was he? He felt... violated...

Judging by the information that he'd gleaned, it should begin with Nāfï for the snowy mountains & still end with either Khrin or Zïr for the Boar Constellation that he was born under. But… beyond that, he knew not what time of day he was born, not really, so he couldn't complete it...

As for his first name, the name given to him by his Vàma. His true Vàma… He… he had no clue…

He felt so… lost…

He... doesn't know how to feel about all this... &... he's suddenly... very aware of the whisper in his ears... He becomes uncomfortable in his own skin. The whispers now sound less charming & more sinister in his own mind. It made his skin crawl.

He begins to have full conversations in his head with it. It's slimy in countenance, trying to convince him to do things that, had he never met Nemma, he's sure he'd have done anyway, believing himself able to use these ideas to his advantage. Even now, he was sorely tempted by the whispers, but some odd sense of self-preservation seemed to kick in. Telling him that it would be unwise to trust whatever this thing was.

Vah Gela, was he going insane??

—

Ganondorf has Kōme & Kotake's names removed from his Shōki Weaponry & has them replaced with Nemma & Ayamay's names in the Gerudo script.

They've both become such important parts of his life in such a short time & in 2 completely different ways.

---

Rauru ends up interrogating Masashai, who is somewhat confused by the questions, but answers honestly, none-the-less. Yet, it was his own answers that doomed him in the end.

He was fired & he just... honestly didn't understand why. So, he asked & the answer had shocked him. Really & truly.

It'd be the first slap of reality that he'd get.

He returned home in a daze to his new Hylian wife, Amira, & his twin sons, Akiru & Masaru. Who had been born to him 10 years ago.

Yet, despite Masashai's hopes for them, he'd soon learn that neither boy had the heart of a warrior, but that of a chef & blacksmith respectively.

Akiru would later grow up to become an Itamae, or skilled master chef, & inherit Ayamay's old restaurant. Which, the restaurant & the recipes in the scroll that he eventually gets from his grandmother would both be passed down for many generations before being inherited by Koko & Clotta's mother, then will later be inhereted by Koko herself.

Masaru, however, learned as much as he could from his grandmother later, the few things she knew about blacksmithing, but ultimately had to figure most everything out himself. His line would eventually lead to Suma & Mura, who in the modern era, reside in the Masamuna Family Smithy in the Rikoka Hills.

In the end, Masashai won't recognize that he'd already had the warrior child that he'd wanted until near the end of his life, but that he'd been a fool in shunning her.

Which, he will survive to an old age, but will be miserable & alone in the end. And with age & experience will come wisdom. Not much, but enough to make him realize some things.

It'll only be on his deathbed that he'll finally open his daughter's letters & he'll find himself suddenly mourning the loss of someone that he never really knew due to his own idiocy.

---

I'll likely go over the final fight between Ganondorf, Rauru, & the Sages, but later.

I do know that he wouldn't be nearly so cocky, but he would be very volatile as the black had entirely consumed his schlera.

Ganondorf would be tense & angry & would say that Rauru knew why he was there & demand that his precious treasure be returned to him.

Which, Rauru would reply with "you don't deserve the favor."

Though, I don't think that Zelda or the other Sages would know what Rauru had done.

---

Anyway, the only thing that would keep Ganondorf sane for those 10 long millennia would be the sound of his wife's heartbeat through the Gossip Stone Earring.

And he'd only find her upon falling into the Depths at the beginning of the game. She'd be housed within a pale blue crystal casket with a luminous stone frame, glowing Zonai & Sheikah runes etched into the surface of the stone. It was beautiful & made her look otherworldly & he could almost pretend that she was just asleep, but he hated the separation with a passion.

Ganondorf would spend the rest of the game beside her body, trying to break the seal, but being unable to even touch her without burning. He wondered if this was how she'd felt being unable to touch him?

It was torture.

I also see him taking out his anger & resentment on Link by using his Zelda puppet. As if to try & make the other man understand his pain. It was cruel, but he'd always been thus.

---

Regardless, the seal on Nemma will only break when Zelda's husband (I will die on this hill, damnit) is at his most direst need. Which would correspond with Ganondorf being at his angriest & most bestial.

The idea was that Nemma would see Ganondorf for the monster he is, but in the end, Rauru would not have expected for Ganondorf's immediate reaction to be to drop everything upon seeing his wife alive, well, & conscious & rush to her side. Removing his Secret Stone immediately & apologizing profusely for not having been able to protect her & the millennia of unfettered isolation as he fussed over her.

(A lot of the ideas for Nemma getting kidnapped came from @karume-everything-else; the only thing I really added was the part where Rauru doesn't kidnap Nemma until after Ganondorf kills Sonia. Which I feel makes more sense given what we know of Rauru as a character.)

—

I'm not sure how the battle would go, but I think I want Nemma to be confused as she takes in the situation, the blond man who she'd positively identify as a threat to her husband, then set aside her confusion to look at Ganondorf & ask, "what do you need?" Her eyes full of support & a readiness to help him however he needs her to within reason.

In that moment, she'd decide to fight at her husband's side. She doesn't need to know who Link is, just that her husband needs her. And Ganondorf would love her all the more for it, the relief unfurling in his chest almost enough to make him begin sobbing into her, but he restrains himself, recognizing that he needed to be strong for her.

Touched, he hands her Namikaze no Odori, which she then uses to cut her hair at around hip length (because her hair had continued growing all those years dormant), & the battle is intense. Their synergy is unmatched as they work in unison, aided by their dance lessons. And as they complement & support each other without words, everything suddenly clicks for Ganondorf. It feels right to fight side by side with this woman. It's then that he realizes that she is the person that he wants to spend the rest of his life with.

Like, he knew that he wanted to rule Hyrule with her as his queen, but it didn't really hit him until this exact moment that he wanted to grow old with her. He wanted to be weak & frail with her, having lived their lives together.

And, finally, if he must die, then he wanted it to be with her.

Which, he'd always expected to eventually begin using his black magic to make sacrifices of children (which the thought of sent shivers of revulsion down his spine) & remain alive for centuries more, but... he knew that she'd never be okay with what it'd entail. Knew he wouldn't be able to convince her to go through with it. It was her one line.

(The torture & sacrifice of children is generally how the wicked witch archetype remains alive for so long. It is also how previous Twinrovas have remained alive for so long. This Gdorf would've only done so once as a young teen & hadn't done so again since as he was still considered to be in his prime. However, remaining alive passed what was normal would require periodic child sacrifices of torture proceeded by consuming their blood. The first time hadn't required such as it'd merely been a way to seal his pact with the dark being his vàman worshiped, but he knew & had even seen them do so with his own eyes & the images haunt him still. The idea of doing that himself had always chilled him to the bone, but his mothers' teachings had allowed him to subdue those feelings & Ganondorf had determined himself to do such to make them proud. However, after Nemma & seeing how highly she valued children, he likewise began to value them thusly. And now, he'd be unable to do it. He would be lying if he said that there wasn't deep-seated relief at the fact that he'd no longer need to go through with the ritual.)

So... one life would just have to do, he supposed.

Anyway, there are 4 different endings here. The first where Ganondorf & Nemma lose & Ganondorf decides against swallowing the Secret Stone, another where they win & kill Link, another where they win, but Nemma manages to convince him to spare Link & take him as their prisoner of war, & one where they lose, but Ganondorf decides to swallow it anyway. I'll talk about these other timelines in a different post. For now, let's focus on the one where they lose, but Ganondorf decides against swallowing the stone as I consider that to be the best outcome & the "canon" one.

If you're curious about the others, visit my MOM Alternate Timelines post.

In the first timeline mentioned, when it comes time for Ganondorf to swallow the stone, he pauses, realizing what he's getting ready to do & looks at his beloved wife.

She threads her fingers with his & her expression says that she'll support & love him whatever he chooses. She's ride or die for him.

And the Demon King realizes that she doesn't know what will happen to him if he does this. She doesn't realize that she'd lose him just as he'd lose both himself & her. And that's when it hit him, if he did this, he'd be leaving her entirely alone 10,000 years from the time she knew. With everyone she'd ever cared for or even known, all gone. She likely didn't even realize that she'd been sealed away for so long.

She'd be totally & completely isolated.

So, he had to choose in that moment. Victory & his lifelong dream of conquering Hyrule... or the love of his life & the future they could have together.

And he... he just... he couldn't do that to her... it wasn't worth it...

Ganondorf dropped the key to his victory & promptly crushed it beneath his foot, his expression boneweary. Not even noticing how his more wretched features began to flake away & drift off before disappearing. Leaving his old self behind, but his skin slightly less green & slightly more brown.

"I... I just want to go home... Let's just go home, Qamàhnï..." (My Beautiful Moon.)

---

At some point, I want Ganondorf to pull something folded into a cloth from his haori sleeve. He unveiled it to reveal the brow ornament that Nemma had gifted him. With a smile, he turned it around & returned it to his forehead.

... He liked it better than the regicidal spoils that he'd obtained from Sonia. It felt... more right. It felt earned.

___

Anyway, once they're alone, he turns to her, holding her face in his hands & looks into her blue-violet gaze, eyes having erubessed as she proceeded with obtaining her tribe's birthright.

When he looked into her eyes in that moment, for the first time, he could see his future unfolding before him in a way he never had before.

The Gerudo King says, "A'nï màtushàq'so..." (I love you passionately or I adore you.) It is a very emotionally charged expression, full of deep-seated vulnerability.

In response, she smiles that utterly rare blindingly beautiful smile that Ganondorf knows is just for those she loves, eyes warm with affection, & repeats him.

And then we get the heartwarming music as they kiss & live happily ever after. Credits roll.

But wait! There's still the epilogue!

---

As a peace offering, Link will give Ganondorf the Giant Horse obviously descended from Mira & Jawàrik. As well as the Giant White Stallion. Who, Ganondorf will be rediculously entertained by the fact that the Gerudo Horse had apparently been bred by a descendant of one of Rauru's prized white stallions. Possibly even a direct descendant of Mira & Old Cabrón.

That gift he gave Nemma just kept paying for itself in dividends!

---

As for Ayamay, she had the Sheikah who created the Sheikah Slate 100 years later record her messages for Nemma & Ganondorf. Which, I'm making it so that the Purah Pad had a lot of the information from the Sheikah Slate downloaded onto it, a few of those files having been the encrypted message from Ayamay.

She needed to tell Nemma that she was so, so proud of her & her grandpa had always been just as proud.

That she was the best granddaughter that she could ever have hoped for.

She also needed to tell Ganondorf that even though he brought Nemma's disappearance upon them (which would cause the man to deflate a bit in shame), he'd also taken responsibility for it & did everything in his power to make it right. That that was a large part of being a man; taking responsibility for one's mistakes & taking care of their loved ones. It'd been the sort of man that Takka was & she was glad to report that it was also the type of man that Ganondorf had become.

And in the end, he succeeded. He got her grandbaby back, safe & sound, just like he said he would.

He did that.

She was proud to call him her grandson-in-heart. Because he was just so good to her grandbaby & she knew in her heart that he'd be good to her great grandbabies too.

And it'll be the first time anyone had ever said they were proud of Ganondorf in his entire life. At least, in regard to he himself rather than what he could do for them. It'd actually been one of his driving motivations before Nemma, to make his adï'vàman (adoptive mothers) proud of him, but as he'd learned, they'd only be proud of him as long as he did what they told him to.

Which, finally having a mother's approval will just cause his heart to break at the knowledge of her death. It'll be an odd mix of joy, grief, & self-pride that'd fill his chest. She'd been something of a Shïchï'vàma to him, or "Spirit Mother." Which is sort of like a godmother, but it's something that the individual parts of the relationship choose for themselves.

There will not be a single dry eye in the room.

Anyway, before the recording ends, Ayamay will leave them a map to a location where she hid a small library full of journals (all infused to never fade) detailing everything that'd happened to her & their friends & their descendants from what she knew. As well as an infused chest filled with letters from Tïsàla & Nīra, as well as the Hōchō-Kaku that Ganondorf made for Nemma. The existence of Nemma's half-brothers will eventually lead to her learning of Koko, Clotta, Suma, & Mura as her living relatives through them. Even learning the fate of her father, though knowing that he died alone & miserable only caused a blip of remorse in Nemma.

Though, Nemma would take heart in the fact that her family's smithing line had continued, even if they had lost their techniques. As such, Nemma would request of her husband that they remain in Kakariko until she had imparted her family's legacy upon Suma & Mura.

She's actually very impressed with how much the family had figured out via trial & error, but because her O-baachan had been the Sayashi (scabbard-maker), she could only teach that, so they did not learn the Masamuna family's secret forging techniques. Luckily, it was mostly just her correcting some things. Though she did also decide to teach them her personal smithing techniques, but that'd have to wait till later.

She also taught them everything that Mapū had taught her about the ancient & forgotten spiritual aspects of swords. Thus reintroducing Shadow & Twilight magic, Sheishin Fūinjutsu, the Ken-e no Sain (Signing of the Sword) Ceremony, & Sheikaku-no-Mikoto to the Sheikah culture. Or, at least touching upon them before needing to leave.

Nemma also took whatever time she could to teach Koko all the old Sheikah recipes she knew (luckily, her cooking journal wasn't taken from her before she was sealed). And during that time, Clotta even seemed to begin to idolize her ancient aunt to the point where she swore to become a Sheikah Warrior just like her. Which led to Nemma teaching the young girl a few things.

It took Nemma a month to impart enough that she felt comfortable leaving with her husband. She would need to teach Suma & Mura the family secrets themselves the coming October, when they were permitted to visit for Ghost Month. (IRL, Ghost Month is between July & August, but I'm changing it a bit here.)

Then, she'd use the subsequent years to teach them the Toketa Hōseki Shita-Kitae (Molten Gem-Folding) & Kaijū-Hone Yakin (Monster-Bone Metallurgy) techniques some other time. After settling down into a new home because the Queen Zelda & her King-Husband seemed to be getting uneasy the longer Nemma & Ganondorf remained within Hyrule's borders.

---

If nothing else, I believe that Tïsàla would've moved in with her boyfriend, who was from Lurelin, which I hc as not having been part of Hyrule at the time of Rauru's rule.

And it will be accompanied by a message from one of the Sheikah researchers informing Nemma that Ayamay had been buried beside her husband.

Which would lead to Nemma & Ganondorf paying their respects to the pair before going on their journey to find their new home.

Though, not until after Nemma had forged new weapons for herself as other than the Namikaze no Odori, her weapons were all lost to time. 2 being a pair of weapons that she devised that resemble a fusion of a scimitar & a Sheikatō, while the others were a pair of simple Kodachi, a Jōhyō Han Kote, & a bow. (Which, in itself, reintroduced the Jōhyō Han Kote to the Sheikah culture.)

She actually modified her design for the Namikaze no Odori's hilt to fit more with modern Hylian-style longswords as she found that she quite liked the use of a pommel. Not only is it useful as a makeshift bashing weapon, but it makes throw thrusting easier. It has an Aquamarine embedded in it.

---

Something interesting to focus on would be Nemma & Ganondorf reacting to how not only the world at large, but specifically the Sheikah & Gerudo have changed.

In Nemma's case, sorrow at the loss of her grandmother, new Gerudo friends, & all her pets, but at least being thankful that she knew what'd happened to them.

As well as the fact that her fears were, indeed, founded as Kakariko has become little more than a sleepy little farming village with the most ambitious of them being more focused on technology than fighting. And the only warriors left being either long retired & too old to still fight or swiftly getting there. It'd break her heart. Like, she doesn't mind farmers & thinks they're very important for the stability of a country or kingdom, but it's tragic that her tribe has lost their warrior traditions.

In Ganondorf's case, the mixed reality that there are only 3 Gerudo settlements left (2 of which being Ealiyah Town & Talthïrï Village) whereas before there were multiple (of which he'd conquered & thus likely caused their destabilization himself, which he'll eventually have to face), but that the ones still around are strangely prosperous, their cultures thriving, & were still warriors. It felt good to see that the foundation that he'd left behind had been utilized well.

Now, they had a true home with houses & businesses & a constant source of water.

In a lot of ways, I think he'd be proud of them, though he might be a bit miffed that they were considered Hyrule's allies. (I never said that he wasn't racist.)

At the same time, he might feel betrayed at the fact that they'd turned it into a vaidina (a sexually segregated town where men are not allowed, which Gdorf would get the inkling that it might've been, at least partially, his fault) & that even he wouldn't be allowed in, but the little hero was. These were his people! Why was he barred entry while that little twink could come & go as he pleased?? He really effing hated that little bastard!

It was lucky that Nemma convinced him to try to build a new home with her elsewhere. After all, why would he want subjects who wouldn't follow him? They'd be likely to betray him as Sàvàrï (Ancient Lightning Sage) did.

Honestly, Nemma is just internally ecstatic that the Gerudo are at a point where they don't need to rape men anymore.

At one point, Nemma visited the Gerudo Palace & discovered that the footprints of polish memorializing the first steps she took into her new home as Ganondorf's wife, had been removed. This caused a deep melancholy in the couple.

Nemma will have also purchased many seeds from all over Hyrule so that when they found this new home, they'd be able to provide for themselves. She actually didn't know much about farming, but she was a damn good gardener & was more than willing to learn & so was Ganondorf, though he's a bit nervous as he'd never been much for creating or nurturing things (& some distant part of him in the back of his mind worries that so many years being groomed into a destroyer might result in dooming them). Either way, Nemma was determined to find out which ones would grow in the desert.

(FYI: There are actually several crops that can easily grow in the desert, such as tomatoes, pumpkins, carrots, onions, radishes, wheat, grapes, beans, eggplants, squash, figs, dates, lettuce, yams, watermelons, ect. Many of the ones listed already having canon Hyrule equivalents. Ie. Hylian Tomatoes, Fortified & Sun Pumpkins, Swift & Endura Carrots, Stambulbs, Hearty & Big Hearty Radishes, Tabantha Wheat, &, of course, Hydromelons. Not to mention all the stuff that are canonically native to the desert or grow there well, including Voltfruit, Shock Fruit, Dazzlefruit, Spicy Peppers, Warm & Electric Safflina, Zapshrooms, & even Wildberries. That isn't even taking into account the things that grow in the nearby canyon, such as Swift Violets, Rushrooms, Ice Fruit, Splash Fruit, Fire Fruit, Sunshrooms, & so on, which would be pretty easy to gather. Hell, the Satori Tree there even has a naturally growing Endura Carrot, so the Gerudo have no excuse not to figure out a way to cultivate them! In fact, you could even argue that Sun Pumpkins might actually be more suited to a desert environment than Hateno as the description says that it grows with lovely sunlight. Sorry, tangent over.)

Ganondorf will never meet his possible sister, but he may well learn about her ancestors.

Also, knowing what'd happened to her loved ones will bring Nemma a measure of contentment, but I really don't think she'd care that much what'd happened to her father, more just being curious. And even if she ever, by some miracle, learned that he eventually regretted his actions, I get the feeling that her thoughts would be something along the lines of "too little, too late."

Nemma will likely go back to wearing more practical clothes after this.

Typically Sheikah in style with Gerudo influence in the patterns & colors.

She'll mainly wear a pair of sirwàl with sand boots, a burnùs, shemàgh with mesh sewn in to cover her eyes, & a wool haori.

Though, now that I think of it, Nemma will need a new Keaton instructor… Methinks Ageda.

I'll think of that later.

—

Side-Note: The Yiga worship Nemma as "the Queen of Darkness" & the patron Goddess of the Yiga. The Yiga style of spellwork is actually modeled after her more traditional style of Sheikah spellwork. However, when Nemma finds out, she'll absolutely hate it. She just isn't an egotistical person by nature & will be very uncomfortable with the idea of being worshiped.

Though, Ganondorf would argue that they both deserve to be recognized in such a way, thus showing that he considers his wife to be his equal. Therefore, if he is worthy of worship (which, he believes that he is) then it's only logical in his mind, that so is she.

Funnily enough, in this au, a bunch of the Yiga tend to be hard-core romantics.

One of the stories that the Yiga recruiters use to tell to bring in new blood was generally the story of how the "wicked" King of Hyrule kidnapped the Demon King's beloved Queen & was sealed away with the help of a traitor to his people. It usually finished off on how the Demon King waited, "sealed away even now," to one day break free to find & save his bride, then to punish Hyrule for its sins against their love & the bigotry vommitted against the Yiga's ancestors.

It's basically the Hyrule equivalent of Romeo & Juliet if it ended on a cliffhanger.

"Only you can help us bring them back together again!" And all that.

---

Anyway, Ayamay has been reborn as a Gerudo woman from Ealiyah Town, Àrta, now old & with an elderly Non-Pointed human farmer for a husband, Aagnan. Who may or may not be Takka reborn too. He was from the Gerudo home continent of Baydaan, but more so from a Hindu-South Korean-like country that had been more lush with life & had spent the last several years learning how best to farm in the desert. He didn't have access to many seeds, but he was sure that with these nice young folks' help, they could nail down what all would thrive in such a harsh environment.

They will be a pair that Nemma & Ganondorf meet as they try to find a new home to build a new life for themselves & the elderly couple will offer them to stay a while, their children having long since left & had families of their own far away.

Either way, it'd be during their stay that Nemma & Ganondorf would discover that she was pregnant (with Jaqàrasïm from the ultimate angsty alternate timeline, being the next Centennial King. Also, since Gdorf is still alive here, the Myriennial Tyrant would not need to be reborn. To see what happens in those alternate timelines, go here.)

Anyway, it will be Àrta who'd bring this to the pair's attention, as she was both a skilled maternity doctor & midwife. The old lady would then offer her services after having talked it over with her husband.

The reaction of the ex-king & queen to the news will be very sweet. Full of both excitement & worry. Just a warning, Ganondorf will make an absolute menace of himself doting on Nemma & being extra protective. He'll often annoy the tiny woman quite a bit. But she won't be able to bring herself to be angry at him because she knows that it's all from a place of love.

The elderly couple will be amongst the first members of the ex-Gerudo king & queen's new kingdom.

Said kingdom will likely be somewhere along the Gerudo Highland range, just further west than the map of BotW or TotK shows.

This would give them access to stone as well as the high quality metals of both the Highlands & the desert. Though, it'd also have to be somewhere where there was a consistent source of water, which might be difficult to find.

They would likely also come across Tïsàla & Nīra's reincarnation & their families as well, though I'm not sure about them. Either way, one of their husbands will probably be a shepherd who cares for Bighorn Sheep. Perhaps Tïsàla's reincarnation could be a builder/carpenter or stone mason?

Also, Àrta being skilled at sewing (being from Ealiyah, they tend to have a very strong textile culture with traditions surrounding such) will also take up teaching Nemma, who's main sewing knowledge involves mending & suturing. Which, while before, she didn't have much use for learning more, with no longer having a clothing shop or tailer to frequent, she figures that she'll need to be able to adjust clothes & make new ones on her own when the old ones get too old to just be mended. And with the baby coming, she wants to make their clothes with her own 2 hands.

Interestingly, she'll find that she has a talent for embroidery.

Ganondorf will eventually find that he quite enjoys farming.

Of course, he doesn't seem to have any real talent in it, but it is something that he gets a strange fulfillment from even though he seems to have to work a bit harder than others to get the same results.

The hard work helps him to sort out his thoughts.

(It's also possible that the Yiga would follow Gdorf & Nemma in an attempt to become their loyal subjects.)

Anyway, the Ganemma Family will actually visit Kakariko every Fall for Sheikioku. They'll remain there the whole season & during that time, Nemma will teach the Sheikah about their ancient culture, which will infuse them more with that old fighting spirit.

Which will eventually lead to the reinstatement of the Shadow Warrior lifestyle & the reconstruction of the Kasuto Bieldcamp in Eldin.

---

In the end, I don't want Ganondorf to be a good person or a hero. I just want to explore him as an actual person with actual feelings. A person raised into his role & never given the chance to choose for himself.

Like, he's still the bad guy, but whereas before, there were very few lines he wasn't willing to cross (except for pedophilia, necrophilia, beastiality, those were always gross-nasty to him), now he had very clear things that he just would not do. So, still ultimately the villain, just not as much of one as he was before. Though, at the same time, he's still not a Saturday morning cartoon villain either. So... maybe more of a Family Values Villain? And when he & Nemma have kids, he'll qualify as Bad Guys Want Good Kids. Just look them up on TV Tropes.

Anyway, I want him to question if any of his beliefs were even his own to begin with. Question if he even actually believes any of it.

Then, when he's at his most desperate, for him to actively make the best decision for both him & his wife regardless of how badly he hated & wanted to kill Link.

So, very much not reformed.

He will likely also continue as a conqueror even after finding this new home, because that's just who he is & how he was raised.

That isn't to say that Nemma is a pushover, so much as she just sees it as the way the world has always been. However, she will absolutely put her foot down on certain things & Ganondorf knows that she's stubborn about things she feels strongly for.

As such, in specific situations, they occasionally butt heads. But they always manage to find a compromise.

And, while I don't want this Gdorf to be redeemed, I do eventually want his soul itself to be redeemed.

I see this life as his first step towards that eventual redemption. Of one day casting off those chains & being truly rid of Demise' influence forever.

LoZ My Fanfic Masterlist

[partywithponies]

Keeley Hawes characters always suffer so much but it's because Keeley Hawes suffers so BEAUTIFULLY

She just plays "utterly devastated and completely broken" and "heartsick and pining" and "completely terrified" and "devestated and betrayed and heartbroken but also furious about it" so WELL, she's truly legendary at it. She cries and screams and sobs and whimpers and you feel it, every time.

[layingeggs]

Utterly devestated in today's Bloodeborne PSX sesh.

I got those 3 Insights, didn't I? Which means you can go out on the balcony in the Hunter's Dream and dress up the little ones!!

So of course we've got to dress them up in doll clothes yeh? The Doll dressed up as a doll, me dressed up as a doll, and the little ones dressed up as a doll. We'll be a real fambily!

But you have to actually give them the clothes you dress them up in. You can't keep wearing it yourself. (Even though they make copies for all the little ones to wear?)

I'm simply crushed. I can see why people say this is such a hard game. I need to try and look in the world and find more spare doll clothes, for my children. I'm worried I might not find it.

In the meantime, dress them up in witch hats. That's kind of the closest to doll aesthetic I think.