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oblivionax · 5 months

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I played Hogwarts Legacy twice now and I realized something about the characters (especially Sebastian) that I need to talk about.

The first playthrough I was charmed by Sebastian. But during the second one I've noticed something was off about him and the way he spoke. Then it struck me — he's a manipulator.

His obsession with finding a cure for his twin sister may come off as adorable and selfless, but after giving it some thought (quite a lot of thought, actually) I came to a conclusion that even this desire of his is selfish.

How? Well, it appears that he views Anne as more than a sibling — as his twin to him she's an extension of himself. A part of him. He feels incomplete without her by his side hence why he wants her so bad back in Hogwarts. Remember how she said she was okay with staying in Feldcroft (save for goblin raids and Sebastian's feud with their uncle)? She might not miss Hogwarts as strongly as Sebastian claims to the player, trying to get their help and appeal to their feelings through pity.

But does Sebastian take into account what she wants? It doesn't seem so. She said so herself, she feels there's no cure to her condition nor does she want for the Dark Arts to be involved. Yet, he gives her no choice, because he's certain he knows what's best for her. After all, she's his twin. The way he had pointed out this fact on more than one occasion demonstrates how important it is to him. Plus, he seems to be of a quite high opinion of himself, he could as well love Anne mostly because she's his female self. Mayhaps he doesn't really want her cured purely out of love for her — first of all, he wants her with him.

Sounds quite possessive and unhealthy. Wait until I remind you it's 1890s and (even if the developers apparently did not aim for historical accuracy) if this world is anything as it was in the actual Britain at the time, then it makes sense why Anne doesn't speak up for herself and is rather passive. You may have noticed how both Solomon and Sebastian seem to take decisions concerning her without even asking her opinion. Well, back in Victorian England it was normal, because a woman's fate was decided by her eldest male relative (father, brother, or, in this case, uncle) or a husband. It also may mean that Solomon did not take his nephew and niece in out of goodness of his heart but because he had to by law.

Now, yes, the story seems to try and show Sebastian killing Solomon as something he did not think through, but if their society functions like irl Victorian England's did, then... Sebastian basically eliminated a rival and now gets to decide Anne's fate however he pleases. Yikes! Intentionally or not, that'd be a chilling detail. I don't imply it's canon, but it does make some sense in its own way.

Sebastian shows deep remorse about killing his uncle, but does he really feel it? If the player chooses to learn the Unforgivable curses, Sebastian states that "your intention must be clear" and "you must mean it". Then he literally says about the murder of his uncle that he didn't "mean it". An interesting word choice. Does not look like an accident to me.

As a manipulator, he flatters, he lies. He lies a lot. Not necessarily maliciously, because he might just also be lying to himself to twist the truth and feel better about it. During my second playthrough I've found myself no longer believing what he says. He's a cunning and ambitious individual who's ready to do anything in order to get what he wants. And that's exactly what he does. Even with his best friend Ominis Gaunt whom he occasionally uses. He said he always has his way with disciplinary matters. Might as well be his charm and/or Ominis, whose father happens to be friends with the headmaster.

Now, about Sebastian's charming exterior. He can charm his way into anyone's heart but his uncle's. He can convince them to do whatever he wishes. He has a calculating strategic mind, choosing his words carefully and making sacrifices to meet his ends, like when he doesn't reveal to the librarian he wasn't alone in the restricted section and when he shows the Undercroft to the player. He likes friends who are in his debt. Of course he does, because he can use their trust later. Perhaps to him people surrounding him are but chess figures on a board.

But oh, how his façade crumbles in those rare moments when he struggles to achieve his goal! Pretty much like Lord Voldemort. Just think about it, he kills on instinct because his uncle destroys his last hope to get back his sister beside him. And he objects against him "taking away" Anne, saying that he "can't" separate him from his twin. The word choice makes it clear how possessive and determined he is about it. When speaking of Anne he stated "she's unwell", but "she's going back to Hogwarts soon". As if Anne's fate really depends entirely on him.

Those were but my own speculations, do feel free to share what you think, whether you agree or not and why. Once again, I'm not saying it's canon and I'm probably digging too deep, but I had to get it out haha. So here we go.

Have a great day and thank you for reading me! Looking forward to reading your opinions!

#hogwarts legacy #hp #harry potter #hogwarts #hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry #sebastian sallow #anne sallow #solomon sallow #ominis gaunt

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mildkleptomaniac · 2 years

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oh baby part three— jj maybank x reader

𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭: “ reader finding out she’s pregnant (with jj) during season 1 events and he freaks out like in a bad way, kinda angsty with whatever ending you want! thanks in advance, love your work : ”

𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬: part one | part two | part three

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 1.7k

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: throwing up, guns, profanities, mentions of beer.

𝒂𝒖𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒓'𝒔 𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒆: ....i didn’t know this many people missed this series. seriously. i still can’t believe this event still takes place during the first episode. i’m still trying to think about the logistics of how this will play out...given the events of the show lol.

“Look, I’m callin’ it off. All right?” John B walked out of the Chateau. The sound of Kie’s bongo playing came to a halt. Pope had been watching her intently. Y/N laid out on a lawn chair, watching her boyfriend toss rocks into the yard. She felt tired from last night, the adrenaline causing her to have sleepy eyes for the rest of the night that carried onto the new day. Her body ached.

“Peterkin said, if I stay out of the marsh, she’ll help me with DCS.” John B sounded desperate. Everyone didn’t want John B to get taken away. The glue. John B was the glue to the friend group it seemed. Despite him not being the most level headed, or smartest, everyone looked to him on what to do next.

“And you believe her?” JJ retorted, perched on a surf board.

“Yes, I believe her, JJ.” John B was quick to reply.

“An actual cop, John B. You believed a cop.” JJ snapped. The Maybank’s held an unhealthy relationship against the cops. Always on their backs. Y/N winced at the two boys arguing about John B’s situation.

“All I gotta do is stay out of the marsh for a couple days, then she’ll help me out. It doesn’t help that your ass was the one shooting a gun.”

Kie and Y/N shared a look, Pope looking down at his hands. Both the teenagers had valid points: JJ having a gun wasn’t the best choice of action, but no one wanted to let Topper drown their best friend.

“Kook versus Pogues, they always, always win!” JJ exclaimed before punching a buoy, pacing around the backyard.

“JJ, relax–”

“It’s okay,” Kie added on to Y/N’s comfort.

“No, it’s not okay! That means there’s something valuable down there, and you know it.” Perhaps JJ felt more in need to discover something to help his own life. Something to get away from his father, comfortable clothing, food in the fridge, money for Y/N and the future–whatever that may be, with or without a baby, Y/N’s a part of it. “I know you do. And I understand why you don’t wanna go.” JJ began reasoning with the Pogues.

He faced his direction to Pope, “You’re the golden boy. You got way too much to risk.”

He faced Kiara, “And you–I mean, you’re already rich as fuck anyway. Why would you bother?”

And then he faced Y/N, “You know what it’s like, we need to see what’s down there,” The words wanted to slip off his tongue, for the baby. For the future. The decision still unclear, with no purpose, direction or guidance.

“Y/N, you and me, we got nothin’ to lose!” JJ continued his spiel. JJ did have something to lose in fact, same with Y/N.

Each other.

“I don’t want to talk about this. I don’t want to talk about it.” John B shook his head, completely unenthused about their conversation. Well, until JJ spelled out the plan for him.

Rich kids don’t go into Foster Care.

Y/N thought John B would be smarter to not listen to JJ’s plans. Logically, stealing from your rich boss seemed most definitely wrong. All the steps JJ meticulously thought out were all stupid. John B would get caught, inevitably–whether it be in the marsh, by Ward, and risking his one chance from Foster Care.

Y/N deemed the risk wasn’t worth the reward. At least to say, Y/N failed to make the wisest choices as well.

She found herself sitting on the HMS Pogue, setting up the SCUBA gear for him. Kie and Y/N shook her head as they read the tanks, practically empty.

“Does anyone know how to dive?” Kie looked at her friends, exasperated. All eyes flickered to Y/N, who shook her head. Being on the swim team differed from SCUBA.

“It’s a Kook sport, ain’t it?” JJ looked at Kiara, leaning against a metal pole.

“I’ve read about it before…” Pope trailed off. Kie rolled her eyes and tossed her hands in the air.

After much calculations and arguments, John B volunteered himself. Y/N watched as Kie stressed herself out over John B’s decision. Stealing a quick glance at her boyfriend, he raised his eyebrows and shrugged. Neither of the two knew what was going on between Kie and John B. The kiss on the cheek caused everyone else to share a look. That’s never happened before.

At least it gave Y/N something to think about, other than the baby growing inside of her.

After a month, buds for arms and legs developed, along with the umbilical cord. The heart had been formed, along with webbed fingers and twos. The life inside of Y/N soon formed ears, eyes, liver, and other facial features.

Y/N studied more about babies than she ever did in biology class, thanks to the books from the store she stole.

Y/N’s face turned pale at the sight of the police boat coming in their direction. “Oh my god,” She whispered. Heart palpitations increased. She felt sick.

“Just act normal everyone,” Kie stated, going back into a conversation with Y/N–as if they were already deep in conversation. She could hear her pulse in her ears, especially as the officer came abroad and began spewing questions left and right.

“I’m going to be sick,” Y/N whispered to JJ. He looked at her, questionably. Most of the time, Y/N was able to conceal their motives from the legal authorities. One of the many things JJ loved about Y/N. She could act and she acted well. A façade that she didn’t just steal beers from a gas station while flirting with the attendant, or letting her friends sneak into the junkyard to find some parts to fix the van.

“Everything okay over there?” The officer asked, before peering over the front of the boat into the water.

“Just–just peachy,” Y/N smiled weakly. Her acting quickly failing, she felt her stomach grumble and tightening. She gracefully found herself over the edge of the HMS Pogue, throwing up into the water. Everyone grimaced at the sight, JJ trying his best to hold her hair up.

Poor John B, Y/N thought. Hopefully he wasn’t on that side of the boat. At least it prevented the officer from investigating the water.

“I just have bad sea sickness,” She announced to the officer, after wiping her face. The two officers shared a look, followed by disgust.

“All right then, just let us know if you see anything out there.” He stated, walking over onto his boat. The engine started.

“Will do,” Echoed from Pope and JJ. The waited as the officers cruised away before glancing over the side of the boat. John B must’ve ran out of air by that time.

“How did it go down there?” JJ asked.

“Well,” The Pogues assisted John B back onto the boat, unloading the gear off of him as he tossed a case onto the boat.

“Y/N scared the cops off with some gnarly acting, being seasick.” Pope grimaced, yet sounding proud of her ‘skills’. Relief washed over Y/N, at least it was in character for her. Kie didn’t believe the acting though.

In the distance, Y/N noticed another boat in the ‘closed off’ marsh. “Guys? Bogey, two o’clock.”

Turning heads, a boat sped their way. None of the Pogues were able to recognize that boat. It wasn’t any of the Kooks–they’d have something fancier–for sure. JJ began pulling on the bowline and kept an eye on the boat speeding ahead.

“I think we should start going, guys!” Y/N exclaimed.

“Don’t wait on me!” JJ continued to pull on the line and the engine kicks on.

“Just act natural, again!” Kie spoke, before holding onto the metal bar. Y/N glanced backwards at the strangers.

“They’re speeding up to us, guys.”

“What?”

“How else do you want me to word it, John B? They’re revving the engine to get closer to us?” Y/N spoke of sarcasm. JJ chewed on his cheek, holding back a smile.

“I’m going!” He argued back.

“They’re following us!” Kie panicked.

“Gun the fucking boat, JB!” Her nerves crept on her, shouting at John B. She watched the strange men follow from several feet behind, creating quite the wake in the Marsh. As the curve the corner, Y/N eyes widened.

“Holy shit, they have a gun!” The words sputtered out of her mouth, not fast enough before the first bullet shot into the air. Y/N slipped down off the seat, covering her head from the action to protect herself.

What the fuck.

All the Pogues got down, while John B continued to speed off. JJ made sure to cover Y/N with his body to protect her. To protect them. Just in case.

This shouldn’t be happening.

“We’re going to die!” Pope shared his feelings before Kie got an idea. She grabbed a fishing net before tossing it in the water, avoiding shots in the process. The net caught onto the follower’s engine, stuttering and whirring.

“That was insane!” Kie laughed, in disbelief.

“Booooyeah!” JJ shouted, enjoying the rush of adrenaline pumping through him. Pope looked relieved and looked at Y/N, who sat there–complexion of a ghost. He watched his friend for several moments, taking note how she didn’t celebrated and how she cradled her abdomen. No blood. No injuries. Yet, she reeked of consternation.

Out of character–Y/N would be cheering as well, throwing her arms in the air before letting JJ plant a big kiss on her. Or maybe she’d suggest celebrating with a pack of beer and music around the fire. Poking at Kie to get free food at the Wreck. Instead, she remained silent for the rest of the ride back to the dock. Last to leave the boat as they emptied the secret treasure, only to reveal a canister with a compass in it. Disappoint filled the atmosphere, killing everyone’s anticipation.

Except John B’s.

“It’s my father’s,”

#jj maybank #jj maybank imagine #( jj maybank )#jj maybank x reader #outer banks imagine #obx imagines #oh baby

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bubbleonice · 10 months

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Carlos Sainz / Rebecca Donaldson / Isa Hernaez

So let:s dive into this and see what is going on in this love triangle. and go further deeper into the connections, and whatever else the cards want to tell us.

Carlos:

Justice reversed:

The general meaning of Justice reversed indicates that you are either not getting what you deserve or on the other extreme, are involved in some activities which are causing harm to others. The worst thing about the Justice tarot in reversed position is that you are not even ready to take accountability for your actions.

Justice cards show a certain kind of blame game going on between . The Justice reversed in love and relationship readings is a clear indication that it is because noone is ready to take accountability.

Ace of wands reversed:

indicates trials and tribulations that you will face in the near future. You might not have any direction, which leads to being uninspired or unmotivated. At this point of your life, you might not know what you really want to do. Maybe there has been a sudden and unexpected change and he might be struggling to adjust.

When the Ace of Wands Reverses, we now see a very definite ‘thumbs down’ signal. When the Reversed Ace of Wands appears, we might be looking at a missed opportunity or chance. There are definetely some sort of regret going on here. Time to work on releasing the old so that one can embrace the new. Both you and your life may need a total make-over. So yes, Carlos definetely is struggling with the new and still attached to the old, and needs to release the old in order to embrace the new in his life. He might or might not have convinced others but is it possible he hasn’t convinced himself? Is there a hesitation about the direction he say he want to head in and what he want to do? he might be conflicted and desperately frustrated.He knows he should be doing something, but what that something is he hasen’t got a clue.

8 of pentacles reversed:

The Eight of Pentacles Reversed indicates a lack of commitment. The Eight of Pentacles Reversed can suggest that he is bored in his relationship? Does it all feel like too much hard work? Does he really love his partner (I sould think this apply to his current partner) or is he just with her for the rewards that may be gained?

Isa:

Knight of Swords:

Swords is associated with thought, intellect, mental strength, and integrity. They can also represent conflict, hardship, and misfortune.

Swords is associated with thought, intellect, mental strength, and integrity. They can also represent conflict, hardship, and misfortune. Big moves, impulsive decisions and following your gut, all while keeping your bigger vision in mind, will be the key to success right now.

8 of cups reversed:

Looks like she has some trouble moving on. Her life is afore her, and she`s made every attempt imaginable to stand still. In this denial of life and refusal to move on, she is creating an air of unhealthy habits and behavior around her. Sometimes this card can even highlight being in a state of denial. Plasticity will no longer cut it. Take the time to seek quiet. She needs to bravely turn her attention inward, to any place within her heart that feels empty, insecure or unfulfilled. Self-investment will fill this empty place, not the attainment of something “out there.”

Rebbeca:

9 of pentacles reversed:

gold-digger, marrying for money/ status, sex trafficking/exploitation/work, dishonesty, deceit, theft, property damage, con artist, scams, cheap, superficial, no style. Well, this doesn`t sound good.

This card will appear often for people who are in a relationship for the wrong reasons, for example those who marry for money and status rather than love. It can simply be an indication the relationship has become too focused on the material or superficial aspects of life.

Queen of pentacles:

the Queen of Pentacles represents high social status, prosperity, wealth, luxury, success and financial independence. Pentacles represent coins/money, so again we see a link to money in this connection .

So from reading the cards combined, seems like Carlos and Isa still have some issues. Carlos has his regrets and Isa is in denial. Rebecca on the other hand seems to see this opportunity as a personal financial gain for her. I`m going to pull a few oracle cards to clarify the connections a little bit more.

Carlos:

Time: Im afraid its too late to take action

Unappreciated: I felt like you didn`t care

Isa:

Space: I need more time to think

Hope: I haven`t given up on us yet

Rebecca:

Unsatisfied: I am not happy where things are going

Unworthy: You`re a better person than I am

I guess the cards are pretty self explanatory, but just to clarify my interpretation. Carlos and Isa faced a sudden and unexpected change, and neither one of them is ok with the changes. Carloz feels remorse while Isa is having a hard time moving on. However, they are both trying to do the best they can. She trying to find peace within herself, and him trying to make his new relationship work. Rebecca seems to not be too happy wih how things are progressing. She can feel Carlos slightly distancing himself. And I understand my cards correctly, she is more into this due to money and prestige, and not so much for the love.

I hope you enjoy this reading. And please keep in mind that this is done for entertainment purposes only. I use tarotcards and oracle cards actively in my readings, as well as my intuition. Energies come and go, what is relevant for today’s reading might change in a few weeks time. But some aspects will always remain constant and the same. Thank you.❤️

#celebrity tarot #intuitive readings #tarot reading #carlos sainz #isa hernaez #rebecca donaldson #celebrity tarot reading #tarot cards #tarot reading for celebrities

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akookminsupporter · 1 year

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Personally I didn't liked concert

BTS concerts used to have a decorum. The work ethic they kept were so high. Any age can easily attend their concert But now many of them are 'trying' to be cool. Thinking swearing a 100 times, drinking on stage which is so unprofessional and including smoking scenes will make them cool adult?

His dad is literally a Liver cancer patient and the reason is easy to guess. Now Yoongi is doing down same way. Y'all like to preach adults can do whatever they want and they know what they are doing when it reality many of them are so dangerous for your own life and people won't even understand because 1)they are addicted 2)they think they are so coolLike BTS complains that we changed, they changed 10001% and I don't like it at all. But as long as he's doing some 'cool' acts it's top tier for yall I guess.

One thing I will always criticize BTS for is that they promoted an almost perfect public life for so long that now in this second chapter when they are showing their fans that they are normal people like us, many are shocked. They are shocked because they are doing things that many in their 20s have done or are doing.

They weren't like that before, they've changed!" No Veronica, they just stopped pretending to be perfect.

I want to believe that you are an older person but I know that there are "young" people who pretend to have the moral high ground, like you.

What people like you always fail to understand is that these people are adults who are responsible for themselves. They have to take responsibility for their actions, not you.

You talk about drinking alcohol and smoking as if it is a sin. It may be bad for a person's health in the long run but many say the same thing about sugar and people consume it every day. You sound like a person whose idealised image of these men is slowly falling away.

The concert was fun, it was very good. It was exactly what everyone expects an Agust D concert to sound like. Because I don't know if you heard but, the concert was not a BTS concert but an Agust D concert.

Have you ever listened to any of this man's songs? I'm going to assume you haven't because that's the only reason you would expect a blown-up castle in the middle of the stage and not Yoongi drinking alcohol.

Before you or anyone else comes and says that they are the role model for too many people and blah blah, I hope those people don't do what others do for the sake of doing it or because they "love them" so much, let alone if it's something bad, controversial or unhealthy. Critical thinking, personal opinion, concepts so easy but so many make them complicated.

Yes, anon, they can do what they want and so can you. If you don't like it, don't watch it. Unfollow them. Believe me, it's not an obligation. I hate prejudiced people who love to beat their chests pretending to have the moral high ground among others.

It's funny how you proved Yoongi's point.

#agust d tour #agust d #bts #suga #bts fan opinions

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teopatra · 1 year

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✨🤭 BIENVENUE 👋🏽👋🏻👋👋🏿

Let me preface by sayin, I went on Google, found some images, saved these images, but I DO not own them and i am NOT citing my source 😆 BC I CAN *karlie red’s voice* teehee yes I did yes I did somebody plz tell ‘em who the EFF I IS 🤪 I’ll give updates if someone takes legal actions 🥳

♍️Pick a fictional Virgo♍️

Since it’s both Virgo season ANND mercury rx im going to be doing a lot of readings themed around this season for research 🧐 purposes 🤓

1. Rue (real life ♍️ Zendaya)

What do you need to work on?

Either you have an unhealthy addiction or attachment to something OR you need to be focusing more on something like your life depends on it due to either procrastination, laziness, self loathing/not believing in yourself ENOUGH OR just not dedicating enough time to something. If you have an unhealthy attachment to something like social media or video games, know that it’s okay to indulge in certain things but you have to have balance and know wen it’s time to take a break.. your screen time could be high but if that’s the case how are you using that time to create content or make that fun thing lucrative for yourself. You can make tiktoks even if you may think it’s stupid bc the views will bring more traffic to your page but only if the intentions are good and you aren’t harming anything or displaying inappropriate behaviors. Also if you play video games you can stream, if you like to read you can do voice memos and turn it into a podcast, reel, YouTube video and you don’t even have to show your face. I’m getting mercurial energy from this pile bc it’s something to do with your voice and hands .. maybe you build, play instrument, make beats, sing, do ASMR whatever ..

Additional Messages: while mercury is in retrograde this is a good time to work on your craft not perfect it just work on it.. beginning stages will not exhibit perfection so if that’s what you expect out of yourself there is where the shadow work needs to be done. You need to make a schedule; it doesn’t have to be time exact focused but you need to have better intentions for your day.. you need to strengthen your upper body especially the arms.. practice breath work and work on healing and or balancing your lower chakras: root chakra, sacral chakra and or solar plexus whatever one resonates with you..

2. Hermoine Granger 📚

What is holding you back?

Your mouth is holding you back because you don’t understand what it means to move in silence. Just because you didn’t tell people about it or show the internet doesn’t mean it didn’t happen. Learn how to enjoy the beauty of life on your own. People will begin to see right thru you and not take you serious if you’re always posting every little thing. Know your own worth, other people see it but it doesn’t seem like you’re being authentic to your true self. Maybe you tried doing shadow work and wanted to reinvent yourself; but who are you trying to be like? If you’re not being you then you’re being a carbon copy and that will just lead you down a path of self destruction.

Additional Messages: I see you’re experiencing some type of food allergy maybe gluten or dairy and hormonal imbalances. You will benefit from journaling, sound baths, and meditation music. Gemini energy somewhere in your chart maybe your moon; if it’s difficult for you to quiet the mind rn maybe bc of issues within the family relating to health or finances then you have to unwind the mind. It’ll take time, (bars) maybe you want to write music is so then do it.. work on the crown chakra, heart chakra, sacral and solar plexus chakras, you really need to recalibrate cuz you’re out of wack and your body or tummy is stressed

3. Bella Swan 🦢

How can you hold yourself accountable?

You use other people’s problems as a way to distract yourself because you want to feel needed by other people. You refuse to do things for yourself or by yourself bc maybe you realize that wen you’re by yourself you’re really sad or lonely.. figure out the root of this sadness and loneliness and heal your trauma. Tell yourself that what happened to you is NOT YOUR FAULT. People will still love you even if you aren’t available for them at the moment, if they’re meant to be in your life they’ll understand. But you don’t want to accept the fact that the people you hold dear to you are probably not meant to be in your life at this time.

Additional Messages: are you using your financial status and material meals to define your happiness? Who would you be without those things? Who are you? Do you even know? You’ve been going thru the motions for so long, that you’ve put your true desires in life aside bc you feel guilty . Heavy guilt issues, check your sun sign and your Saturn and the houses they’re in.. Heal your root chakra and if you’re going thru a Saturn return you better understand what that means for you now since the start of it until the end or else you’ll have to wait another 27 years to really dive into what you love…

4. Frodo Baggins 🧝🏽‍♀️

Where you need to communicate better…

If you have a speech impediment or your first language is diff than those around you causing language barriers do NOT be afraid to express yourself. If anyone makes fun of you for the way you speak they’re a loser and work on your confidence so this doesn’t bring you down. You know what you’re trying to say so maybe work on how to express yourself better with words. You may deal with self doubt, insecurity, trauma, and you may shut down when you feel like others don’t understand you. It’s mercury retrograde and I see for the next 3 weeks people just may not listen , that doesn’t mean talk louder, that doesn’t mean argue, become a better listener and this will help you with your communication. I feel Aquarian energy like you’re different and the ones who know you understand when you speak but you have to have balance and be able to speak in all aspects don’t be afraid or shy it’s okay.

Additional Messages: check your 11th house, and aspects to your Aquarius house, work on your throat chakra and your root chakra. If you’re in school for psychology or you’re an astrologer then you already have the answers you seek you just don’t trust yourself so work on the heart chakra as well.. idk why you don’t trust yourself you’re actually very intelligent but you have some type of disability maybe, confidence and time will strengthen this

5. Jorah Mormont 🗡️

What isn’t working for you anymore?

other people opinions aren’t working for you; you keep allowing people to put their 2 cents in when you need to trust your gut. You have a very keen eye and people feel important wen you ask their input. It’s okay to ask advice from others time to time but ask the universe, the divine, your spirit team, and or your higher self to enlighten you. There may some evil eye around you in regards to your work, others see that your hard work will lead you to success but people feel left out and want to siphon all your energy. Insecure and low vibrational people aren’t working for you. Your challenge rn is to know wen is a good time to just put your phone on DND and do you whether it’s rest or meditation. Strong Leo energy, check your sun sign your 5th house and anything aspecting your Leo house.

Additional Messages: you may need more sunlight or you may need to use more sunblock so you don’t get radiation poisoning. Or some of you could be outside n the sun too much which is draining you in some way. Vitamins could benefit you or orange foods like oranges and carrots. Maybe try drinking smoothies, cut out carbonated drinks and snacks high in sodium, it’s causing brain fog and memory loss. Fatigue is happening to you bc you’re probably over worked and don’t drink enough water or the right type of water.

6. Neo 👽

How to be more productive?

Be more imaginative , be more delusional, exercise your neptunian or piscerian energy by making your dream or fantasy world reality. You need to strengthen your psychic abilities maybe by asking the universe or higher power to give you a sign.. work on your telepathy by imaging a certain object you want the universe to use to communicate with you to affirm. Stop doubting your intuition just because it may scare you. If you believe that we live in a simulation and nothing is real then why are you allowing this reality to bring you down. Pretend you’re in a video game or movie and you’re the main character or final boss. You may need to move your body more bc your blood isn’t circulating enough or properly esp if your body parts have been falling asleep lately

Additional Messages: it would benefit you to detox, drink more water and take on a healthier diet or lifestyle because something is clouding your judgement and intuition. Check your chart for what planets are in your 12th house or aspecting your Pisces placements. You’re in a self deprecating mode rn and you have to snap out of it. Eat less meat especially if you’re a water sign bc you’re taking on the energies of those unalive animals your eating you feel their pain.. also stop eating GMO food for 60 days…

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3:03 on the clock

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jinxedmuse · 1 year

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let me back in — joshua hong, 홍지수

🎵 i keep thinking, maybe if you let me back in (did i fall out of line when i called you?) we can make it better, breaking every habit. pull myself together, you could watch it happen (when i told you, "i’m fine," you were lied to) let it happen, let it happen.

in which: reader and joshua are in a confusing relationship. a constant tug of war over who can get each other more in love, and more heart broken.

authors note: hii! tysm for the new support ! wish i could hug u all :( it means sm & truly motivates me to keep writing! plz enjoy this angsty one shot i whipped up a few nights ago while missing shua & having this song on loop!! ><

tags/warnings: afab reader x non idol joshua, unhealthy relationship, fwb except they’re barely friends, extremely angsty, mutual pining but they’re both too hurt to realize. mentions of the word sex but no actual smut, just suggestive moments. discussion that may come across as ‘arguing’ but they’re just genuinely learning how to properly communicate for the first time since they met…

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　　˚　　　　 . ★⋆.

joshua’s phone rang at exactly 12:00 am on his birthday.

just as a stream of constant messages poured in, wishing him a happy 27th birthday. another added year signifying he was truly growing up, catching up to time.

the number calling was one he hated himself for recognizing. for engraving so deep within his mind that he could practically say it backwards.

he mentally cursed himself more for what he did next; picking up.

“joshuuuuu” the voice sang out, your voice. on the other end, almost fully overtaken by the sound of what seemed like a club in the background along with laughter from your friends.

“this.. this is way out of line.” he begrudged out. it was wrong, so wrong for you to be calling. even worse for him to be entertaining it.

yet, here he was and he felt oh so genuinely content that you remembered his birthday after almost a year with no contact. now listen, in his honorable defense, shua was many things; dumb? wasn’t one of them.

however, when it came to you? his acquaintance, old friend, ex, situationship, fling, lover, whatever the hell you wanted to call it. he was, no, the first step is accountability. he is, way too smitten for you to have anything such as common sense.

“i know. trust me, i know. it’s just old habits die hard, you know?” you slightly slurred with a melancholic tone. as if reminiscing the countless times in your knowing of each other that this almost exact conversation has happened.

“yeah, i know. so.. what is it tonight?” joshua asked. slightly hopeful that you had more in mind then a simple birthday phone call.

“i have something for you, let me come over.”

his heart practically raced out of his chest. he could already imagine a string of thoughts; possible scenarios that could occur. but he had to put on a front, at least try to resist.

even if it was just a bit.

“at what point are we going to have enough of each other? isn’t this tiring?” he asked, feigning an exasperated sigh.

more than anything in this world he wanted this constant cycle to end, but more than anything in the world he wanted you, craved you, just as much.

the question rang in your ears. i mean genuinely, just what were you two still doing? both in your mid to late twenties playing a constant game of back in forth, banter through the pain that left you both feeling lonely for what? the nostalgia of it all?

at what point would this tug of war finally be bearable?

maybe when it ended.

regardless, you ignored his question. refusing to let the buzz of tonight’s choice of alcohol wither away into the depths of such a question.

“is it still the same address birthday boy?”

there was silence. followed by what seemed to be him getting up.

“yes.” he timidly replied. too embarrassed to acknowledge the fact that your grip on him seemed to be getting stronger each year.

“good!” you exclaimed. getting your purse and slinging it onto your shoulder, grabbing a full bottle of sikhye before gesturing to your friends that you were leaving and would call them later.

“why’s that good?” he asked, retreating to lay back down on his couch.

“it’s only like a 20 minute walk from the club i’m at.” you said nonchalantly while double checking your map app.

“no need, i’ll order you a uber. wait out front.” he replies. he then puts you on speaker and starts ordering the ride, wanting the quickest and most comfortable one that would bring you to him.

“why? i’m a fan of walking actually. i picked it up a few months ago. needed something to do to distract myself from you joshu.”

there was a pang in his heart that felt all too real. he hated when you guys weren’t on speaking terms and the fact that you could bring it up all so casually while he had difficulty even whispering your name to recount to his friends what happened this time.

“that’s great, i’m happy for you. but there’s no need to tonight.” and with that, the ride was purchased. uber black, all for you.

“why? a gentleman doesn’t let a lady walk alone? that’s certainly not coming from you i hope.” you mocked bitterly. trying to push away one of the many painful memories you’ve had since your entanglement with joshua.

“you never let me explain my point of view of that night.” he complained. the flash backs still all too real, as if they had happened just yesterday. a feeling of frustration and guilt making home in his heart.

the uber black suv pulled up to the side. a man coming out to open the back seat door for you as you tumbled forward, thanking him quickly. once you’re in, he closes the door and you focus of not getting car sickness as he departs.

there’s a twinge in your stomach that has you patting it gently. you lower your window and stick your head out slightly. the cool air of the night slowly waking you out of your drunken state.

there’s a few minutes of silence before joshua speaks up again.

“hello? y/n? you still there?” he asked, tone laced with worry.

the question made you laugh.

despite all that you two had went through. the unrequited high school love that soon turned to a torturous one. years of pining, unbelievable out burst of arguments, and some passion yet “casual sex” but you both knew all too well there was no such thing as ‘casual’ for you.

regardless, you were still here. on the way to his place at almost 1 am on his birthday.

“yeah. i’m still there.” you replied.

you both always joked that you were probably thriving soul mates in another universe. you guys read each others mind dangerously fast but it still took you by surprise when he immediately picked up on the heavy meaning behind your words.

“it’s okay. i’m still here too.” he answered. as if to let you know that you weren’t alone in this cruel yet daunting situation. because after all, it takes two to tango.

soon enough, the driver stopped in front of the towering condos. you get out, once again thanking him as you grab your stuff and try to pull yourself together.

what takes you by surprise is the fact that joshua is waiting for you outside. wearing all black, hair slicked back and phone still to his ear. a small smile appeared onto his face, he looked as handsome as ever.

it still made your heart race just as it did when you first realized you liked him all those years ago in high school.

you walked towards him, trying to remain in a straight line. the nerves of the alcohol no longer giving you the confidence which had led you here in the first place.

it isn’t until you’re a few feet closer to him that he starts walking forward to meet you.

you’d make a joke about his action and the symbolism it had in regard to your relationship (or truly lack-there-of) but it still hurt too fresh. was still too early.

“here. happy birthday” you said slightly shoving the sikhye into this arms. he hangs up the phone and takes it, holding it carefully.

“so, how’ve you been-“ he starts but you’re already walking way past him, making your way to his place which he left unlocked.

joshua’s not dumb. he knows you did it on purpose. small talk never having been your fortitude but it still hurt him.

you enter the condo, him following closely behind snd locking the door.

as you take off your shoes and set down your purse, you looked around. everything the same as the last time you were in here on your birthday, almost a year ago.

“i’ve missed you.” he says while setting down the sikhye on his marble counter top. the small lights on top illuminating him. he almost looked angelic.

he always knew just what to say to have you weak in the knees. it was infuriating.

“i’ve missed your nice ass place, do you always have the ac blasting like this?” you say as you flopped down onto his ridiculously soft beige couch. using one of the pillows to prop yourself up.

“the floors are heated so i like the cool air, even during winter” he comes up and sits beside you on the couch, observing you closely.

“well my bad mr.money man” it took everything in you to not physically roll your eyes. you weren’t actually annoyed and you knew shua wasn’t saying it to brag but it was frustrating how seemingly put together his life is.

aside from this rather “chaotic” ensemble, your life was actually pretty nice. yet you were always right behind him, a step behind like some loyal puppy.

and tonight, you had the urge to prove once and for all you weren’t just a puppy, you were an equal.

what you didn’t know was that he already saw you as one.

“come here” he says while patting his back, looking at you with eager yet cautious eyes.

you don’t verbally respond, just physically get up and do as instructed. straddling his lap.

his hands dig into your waist, holding you in place.

“explain yourself.”

you both said it at the same time. it was eerie but earned a unanimous laugh.

“you first” you string out. one hand playing with the ends of his hair and the other just below his neck, playing with the hem of his shirt.

“look, y/n.. this isn’t just a one way street and we clearly remember things differently” he says blatantly. the grip he had on your waist loosening the more he spoke.

“just admit it.” you start, piercing into his soft brown eyes.

this would be much easier if he wasn’t so handsome.

“admit what?” he ask. hands trailing up and down your back, just how he used to back in uni.

“that i’ve had it worse, it hurt me harder. admit that you, hurt me way worse.” you demand, trying to ignore the ache in your throat.

joshua tilts his head back and let’s out a frustrated sigh.he looks back at you with something else in his eyes, lust.

he pulls you closer to him while pushing you down onto him. you look at him confused but he doesn’t speak yet, instead he starts pressing light, gentle kisses up your arm.

“did i complain when you started going out with that pathteic exuse of a man might i add, in uni just a less than a month after you confessed to me?” he ask peering up at you.

there was a slight pang in your heart. you remember it so clearly. after years of a seemingly unrequited love in high school, you confessed to him in uni.

hoping, praying, that it would help you get over joshua.

when he didn’t give an answer before mid terms, you tried moving on in another ways. getting with a guy that liked you way more than you liked him.

thinking back, it was definitely cruel but staying alone and seemingly rejected seemed worse.

he continues, both kissing your body and speaking. as if letting out years of pent up hurt in the air.

“did i ignore you after you rejected my confession at the end of the last semester? a week or so before my birthday? you ignored me sweetheart; even though i was the one rejected.”

this one struck a nerve.

a memory far too painful to be brought up. he goes up to kiss your collarbone but you back up, ultimately getting off him and sitting on the table in front of him.

“seriously joshua? are you really still acting confused as to why i rejected you then?” you ask fully bewildered. one eye brow slightly raised as you observe the man in front of you.

he leans forward and mocks your expression. daring you to state your reasoning after all these years.

you let out a dry laugh before crossing your arms.

alright then, your turn to straighten some things out tonight.

“joshua hong do not act oblivious to the fact that i have been pathetically in love with you since high school. i don’t know if it’s when you started sitting by me in class, or opening my drinks, or that time you shaded me from the sun while i was napping in p.e but i have been. plain and simple, okay?”

he starts to talk but you cut him off, determined to get your point through.

“foolish teen me thought i was special. until, i realized you probably sat next to me because your two friends sat in front of me, you open anyone’s drinks, and excetra excetra but either way, i made the dumb mistake of confessing my feelings for you in uni.”

you’re angry now, not at him but at how pathetic you must’ve seemed all these years.

he stays quiet, letting you take a breather before continuing.

“so yes. to get over you i started dating, having fun, doing anything to fix a mended heart of what i assumed was unrequited love because you gave me some ambiguous ass answer and what i needed in my life was not ambiguity, especially from you.”

you get up while taking, now pacing around his table trying to stop any tears that warned they would fall out if you looked at him any longer.

“then, a year into my relationship, on my relationship anniversary, you confess to me and crumbled down genuinely almost every ounce of self respect and happiness and i barley managed to scrape together to make my relationship work. i had to break up with him because how could it be fair to try and love someone else when a single confession, no, even just a mere look from you spiraled me back into you palm.”

joshua looks pained as he looks at you, getting up to come over to you but you stand firm on the other side of the table. moving sides any time he tries to approach you.

not afraid of him, never afraid of him.

afraid of the affect he has on you.

in a momentary lapse of weakness, a tear comes out and you immediately wipe it away.

“i love you. a lot more than you do me which is fine, i accepted that a long time ago but i will not be the girl who has these arguments with you once a year and then slips out in the morning after we’ve had sex. not again, i can’t.”

you didn’t even realize when but joshua was suddenly at your side, holding you gently and leasing you to sit back down on the couch next to him.

“y/n i’ve loved you a lot longer than you think, i swear it. and i’ve never once told you to leave in the mornings, trust me. i never sleep well because i wake up practically scorn when i see the spot you’re supposed to be in is empty. i get hurt a lot more easier than you think, it’s written all over my face when i miss you.”

his words practically ate you alive. if he had said all these years ago, even months, no even just last week you probably would’ve gone right back head over heels, full in.

you let out a coarse laugh. the ache in your throat from holding back your tears evident as ever and he realizes this, gently brushing back some hair behind your ears.

“you never told me to leave but never asked me to stay.” you murmur almost incoherent while staring down at your hands.

“mhm?” he hums, confused at the string of words you purposely rushed out.

“i said, you never told me to leave but you never asked me to stay.” you repeat, now looking at him directly. trying to read his eyes.

this, he couldn’t refute. and he knew it deep down as well.

after all those years of pining and watching from afar it still felt too real for him when you were suddenly in his bed for the first time.

you could’ve thought he was a teen who hadn’t had his first kiss yet. hands shaky, eyes nervous to meet yours, mind racing with thoughts at 100 miles per hour because that is how much of an affect you had on him.

he never admitted it though, failed the chance to and soon enough you mistakenly took his silence as a “hint” and slipped out every morning before the sun even rose.

it was his turn to tears to start falling but his hands felt too limp to even dry his eyes. so when you raise yours and wipe them away ever so gently, all he can do is cry into your hands.

“i’m sorry” he starts choking out.

“i really am so sorry. if i could do it all over again, if you just let me back in, i would. i would make it right. make a move faster, acknowledge my feelings earlier, not let you slip away so easily. i would tell you to stay. i want you, no, i need you to stay.” he rushes out, practically pleading at this point because God forbid he lets you out his life again.

but you both know it can’t happen. you’ve hurt each other far too much, have fallen dependent on each other for far too long.

it was unhealthy and you both knew knew it.

you firmly interlock your pink with his and stand up. he looks at your pinkies for a few more seconds before standing up after you.

you walk ahead, grabbing your purse and slipping on your shoes. your pinkies still loosely intertwined.

joshua wants to say something, he tries to on multiple accounts but every time he opens his mouth, tears brim his eyes again.

you unlock the door and slightly go outside, your pinkies barely still holding onto each other.

you stare at each other longingly, as if you both knew in your hearts that it would be for the last time.

you smile fondly, even after just crying he was still so handsome.

“same time next year?” he jokes

you let out a genuine laugh and he swore in another life he’d do anything to keep hearing it.

“i’m joking. you are never, ever, allowed in my “nice ass house” again.” he dead pans, while not so obviously trying to hide a small smile.

you knew it had to end here, at his door step, pinkies intertwined. it would’ve never worked, no matter how much you guys both wanted it.

“i’ll miss you, so much.” you say sincerely.

he knows this. “miss” was a massive understatement in his books. he leans forward, placing a gentle kiss in your lips which you kissed back but for once you don’t chase after his lips once he pulls away.

he places another light kiss on your temple, as he does so he pulls away his pinky and this action is the one that almost breaks you all over again.

a beat passes, you stare at each other with simultaneously far too much love and hurt to ever truly be strangers.

“i’ll miss you too. just as much.” he echoes. meaning every word.

and with that, for the first time since meeting him, you pulled yourself together and turn your back to him first.

you walk away first.

and he watches it happen before closing his door, for good.

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grahamfolgersdeliciousnotebooks · 1 year

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Happy Jmart-iversary!!! Have some S1 annoyances-to-lovers (or, well, annoyances-to-mutual pining) Jmart to celebrate their day!

Martin usually has more shame than this.

Despite what certain Archivists might think, he isn’t oblivious. He knows Jon doesn’t like him, and while Jon seems to think that Martin has made it his mission in life to bother him whenever possible, Martin usually does his best to avoid Jon as much as civility and his job will allow.

But the thing is, Martin is lonely.

Worse than that, he’s 1 AM Lonely.

Martin has become something of an expert in loneliness, over the years, and he can confidently assert that 1 AM loneliness is the absolute worst. 7 AM loneliness is rough. 8 PM loneliness can be dire. But 1 AM loneliness is utterly, entirely hopeless. If he felt this way while the sun was still up, he might be able to find an excuse to call Tim and Sasha that wasn’t just, “I wanted to hear your voice.” If nothing else, he could walk to a library, or a coffee shop, and remember that there were other people in the world. But at 1 AM, he has nothing to do but sit with the yawning, aching emptiness in his chest, and feel like he is the last person left on the face of the earth.

Except for Jonathan Sims.

He’d always sort of suspected that Jon had a deeply unhealthy work schedule, but he was still surprised at how often he wandered out of Document Storage after midnight, expecting to have the Archives to himself, only to run into Jon in the breakroom. He’s always more irritable at night – which Martin wouldn’t have thought possible, a month ago – but an irritable Jon is better than nothing, which is how Martin has found himself standing outside Jon’s office in his pajamas, socked feet barely keeping out the chill of the scuffed linoleum floor.

There’s still time to change his mind. He could still turn around, go back to the cot in Document Storage, and sit in his insomnia with some semblance of dignity intact.

He knocks.

There’s no response, but Martin’s used to that, so he lets himself in. When the door opens, Jon lifts his head from his work to stare daggers at him.

“Yes?” he snaps. “What do you want?”

“Just– J-Just checking in. Do you need anything?”

“No,” Jon says with a finality that borders on rudeness.

“Right.” Martin can take a hint, so he starts backing out of the door. “I’ll, uh… I’ll leave you to it, then.”

Jon purses his lips like he wants to say, See to it that you do, but is aware that that would be rude even for him, and says nothing. Martin winces as he pulls the door shut behind him.

Well. He did achieve what he was setting out to. He no longer feels like he’s completely alone in the world – there’s at least one asshole here with him.

Somehow, that thought comforts him enough that he is finally able to sleep.

The next few days, Martin manages to sleep a bit better. The Archives are remarkably empty on the weekend – not even Jon is working Saturdays, this week – so he has to contend with 3 PM loneliness (and 4 PM loneliness, and 5 PM loneliness…) but by 1 AM he is sound asleep. When the work week starts again on Monday, Martin is feeling almost well-rested.

Jon, it seems, isn’t.

He hasn’t stayed late at the office for the past few days, but whatever he was doing away from work, Martin feels confident that it wasn’t sleeping. He’s in an even worse mood than usual, and chews Martin out for a full 5 minutes about a simple formatting error that Martin has seen Tim and Sasha make before.

(Tim used to work in publishing, he thinks but does not point out, he built his career on finding formatting problems, so if even he screws this up occasionally, I’m pretty sure it’s not a huge deal. But of course, when Tim makes a mistake, he gets a note on his report asking him to revise it, not a 10-minute lecture in which it’s implied that he doesn’t take seriously the historic institution for which he works, and that he may as well be spitting on the grave of Jonah Magnus with each misused semicolon.)

Which makes it all the more embarrassing when 1 AM rolls around and Martin once again hesitates outside the door to Jon’s office. He’s got tea this time, which is a pretty feeble excuse to barge in at 1 in the morning, but it’s a better one than he had last time. He has to shift both mugs to one hand to get the door open.

“Tea?” he asks in lieu of a hello. “I was making some for myself and figured you might want some.” (It’s a bald-faced lie, but Jon doesn’t need to know that.) When Jon doesn’t respond, Martin trips over himself to fill the silence. “It’s, uh. I-It’s herbal. I hope that’s alright. Thought caffeine was probably a bad idea, this time of night.”

“Hm,” is all Jon says in response, but he still takes a sip.

Martin settles into the seat opposite the desk. Jon eyes him suspiciously, but once again says nothing. He turns his attention back to his laptop, and they drink their tea in silence.

It’s almost pleasant, somehow. The tea is delicious, in Martin’s completely unbiased opinion, and Jon relaxes enough to become a reassuring presence. He doesn’t speak, but he’s a living, breathing human in the same room as Martin, and that’s all Martin needs right now. Jon sighs and coughs and taps his foot, and whenever he notices a mistake in whatever it is he’s reading, he gives an irritable click of his tongue and starts typing furiously. At one point he even laughs. It’s not much – a quiet little bark of a laugh, barely any louder than his sighs – but it still comes as a surprise.

“What?” Martin asks, and Jon startles as though he forgot Martin was there.

Jon looks vaguely mortified to have done something so human and unprofessional as to laugh, but he explains, “Tim’s report on the Ramao case. His methods for obtaining Ramao’s marriage license were… very Tim.”

“Ah.” Martin has a few guesses at what that could mean. “B&E, bribery, or flirting?”

“Flirting,” Jon confirms. “Honestly, I’d prefer a good B&E. At least then I wouldn’t have to explain to Elias why dinner for two at Frescobaldi counts as a business expense.”

“Always happy to do my part,” Martin grins, but his smile droops as he adds, “Though my last break-in didn’t quite go to plan.”

Jon’s face grows serious as well. “Right. How, uh, h-how are you… adjusting?”

“Fine,” Martin says, and it’s not the biggest lie he’s told in his life, but it’s close.

“Right,” Jon says again. He doesn’t ask any follow-up questions, and Martin can’t help but be relieved to let the subject drop, even if the rest of the conversation drops with it. They go back to drinking their tea in silence, and soon enough it’s time for Martin to collect their empty mugs and slink back out of the office.

This time, at least, Jon says good-bye.

“Good night, Martin.”

Martin’s lips twitch upward, just a hair. “Good night, Jon.”

He sets the mugs in the sink and heads back to Document Storage, and he’s asleep within minutes.

Tuesday night he manages to fall asleep at a shockingly reasonable hour. Which is wonderful, right up until it isn’t.

He wakes up in a cold sweat from a nightmare that is already fading from his memory. His dad was in it, which is rare. He tries to recall what his face had looked like, but it’s gone. Maybe he hadn’t even had a face – dreams are like that sometimes – but he can still feel it at the edges of his memory, slipping away with each passing second.

He does his best to remember what the dream had been about. He was back in the apartment he used to share with his mother, the tiny, dingy place that forever smelled like mildew and cigarettes even though neither of them smoked, and his father was there. Then he left, again, and his mother was furious. She didn’t need to say that she blamed Martin, he could read it in her face, but she told him anyway. And then the apartment was a hospital room, and there were nurses yelling at him, too – how could he upset his mother at a time like this? Didn’t he know how ill she was? And then the hospital was his new apartment, and the mildew smell wasn’t mildew at all but worms, worms and rot, and he hadn’t spoken to anyone in weeks. He hadn’t spoken to anyone in weeks, and no one had thought to check on him, and the only one in the world who cared whether he lived or died was the woman trying to break down his door and fill him with worms.

So not the best dream he’s ever had.

He checks his phone. 12:22. Great. Too late to talk to anyone, too early to just get out of bed and start the day.

He stares out at the dark room. Document Storage has no windows, and with the hallway light off, there isn’t even any light spilling in under the doorway, so his eyes have nothing to catch on. He can do nothing but sit in the dark as the afterimage of his bright phone screen gets swallowed up by the gloom.

It’s not as though the dream was real. He’s safe for now; the worms can’t get to him here. And he’s not alone in the world. He’s not. His coworkers didn’t just abandon him to die – he’s seen the texts, he knows they had every reason to think he was safe.

Still, if Tim had been out for two full weeks with a stomach bug, Martin would have been on his doorstep with soup and ginger chews and an offer to drive him to the doctor any time he needed. He would have checked up on him. So would Sasha. So would Jon, probably – as much as he likes to present himself as aloof and coldly professional, Martin knows he cares about Tim and Sasha a whole lot more than he lets on. There’s only one person in the Archives who could disappear without being missed.

It isn’t that his friends don’t care about him. He knows they do. But he also knows, with bone-deep certainty, that they don’t care about him as much as he cares about them, and that’s a very lonely feeling.

Martin pushes himself out of bed. He doesn’t know what to do, exactly, but he’s had enough nightmares in his life to know that getting out of bed and away from the room he woke up in is a good place to start.

There’s a light on in Jon’s office. This time, Martin can’t even bring himself to be embarrassed when he steps inside.

Jon is sitting behind his desk, like always, scribbling furiously in the margins of some document Martin doesn’t recognize. He doesn’t even glance up when Martin enters the room this time.

“Yes?”

“Do you–” Martin’s voice is hoarse and rough – he hadn’t thought to get anything to drink when woke up, and now his throat is painfully dry – but he clears his throat and pushes through. “Do you need anything?”

“No.”

“Right.”

Martin takes a seat in the chair beside the desk. He doesn’t try to make conversation. He doubts Jon wants to hear it, and he isn’t feeling up for it, anyway. He just sits and listens to the scratching of Jon’s pen.

He’d be more than happy to sit in silence all night, but Jon keeps pausing his work to shoot suspicious glances Martin’s way, and Martin knows he ought to say something, so he clears his throat again and asks, “Are you sure you don’t need anything?”

“Quite sure, thank you.”

He sounds more than a little irritated. Martin should definitely take that as a sign to leave, but he isn’t ready to go back to sitting in the dark in Document Storage just yet.

“I could make tea?” he offers. “It’s no trouble, really.”

“I don’t need tea,” Jon snaps. “And I don’t need help, and I certainly don’t need a nosy coworker barging into my office every five minutes to try and guilt me into leaving work.”

“What?”

“I know what you’re doing,” Jon insists. “And it’s none of your business how late I work–”

“I don’t care how late you work! I mean, I think you could stand to get some sleep once in a while, but that’s not–”

“Then why are you always hovering around any time I work late?”

Martin is too tired to think better of it before he snaps, “Because I’m lonely, Jon! Because it’s one in the bloody morning and I can’t sleep and everyone else I know is already in bed. Believe me, if there was a single other person I could be talking to right now, I wouldn’t be here.”

“Oh.”

That’s all Jon says. Martin isn’t sure what he’s going to say if he stays in this room any longer, so he stands up.

“I’m going to make tea. Do you want any?”

Jon nods.

When Martin comes back with two perfectly-brewed cups of camomile-and-vanilla, Jon has set aside his pen and his notes and is fidgeting at his desk. Anxiety and shame flicker across his face when he accepts the mug that Martin offers him.

“I’m sorry,” he says. “I wasn’t thinking. I thought you just wanted me out of the Archives.”

“Yeah, well. Not everything’s about you.”

And Jon laughs at that – the same soft, barking laugh he’d given to Tim’s report – and Martin feels a strange sort of affection flood through him at the sound. Pretty inconvenient, given that he was just getting used to being irritated with Jon.

“I suppose I deserve that.” Jon smiles, and it’s somehow worse than the laugh. There are a few more minutes of silence before he speaks up again. “Have you, um. Have you ever tried lavender?”

“What?”

“Whenever I tell people I have insomnia, they always recommend lavender – lavender essential oil, lavender tea, lavender eye masks…”

“Have you tried it? Does it help?”

“Not in the least,” Jon says. “Not for me. But maybe it would help you.”

“Maybe,” Martin agrees, more out of politeness than any real hope. “Never hurts to try.”

Jon nods. He looks for a moment like he’s debating with himself whether to say anything else, then he clears his throat with an awkward little grimace and says, “If– i-if you ever need to talk… I can’t promise I’ll be very good conversation, but I can promise I won’t yell at you next time.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.”

Martin’s insomnia doesn’t get any better. Breathing exercises don’t help, and neither does the white noise app he downloads. A box of lavender tea mysteriously appears in the break room, and it doesn’t make him tired, but it does leave him with a warm, fuzzy feeling that can’t be entirely explained by having drunk a hot beverage.

Jon starts staying late more often. Some nights, just knowing that he’s there is comforting enough to stave off the worst of Martin’s loneliness, but some nights he finds himself once again sitting in the chair in Jon’s office while Jon sits across from him with his nose buried in a statement. Jon never asks for an explanation anymore, just nods at Martin when he comes in and then gets back to work.

They don’t talk much on nights like this, but they do talk. Mostly it’s just chatter – how was your day? Did you see what Tim was wearing today? How long until they fix the aircon in this building? – but some nights the conversation opens up to the kind of vulnerability that only 2 AM can bring.

“I wish I was as close with Tim and Sasha as you are.”

It’s not a complete non sequitur – they were just talking about their coworkers – but Martin can still feel the tone shift between them.

Jon just blinks. “What do you mean? I’m certain they like you more than they like me – The three are always going out to lunch–”

“And we always invite you!” Martin reminds him, “You just never come! And anyway, you three go way back, you all know each other so well… They don’t even know me well enough to know if it’s me texting them or some evil worm woman.” He’s gotten to know Jon well enough over the past few weeks to know that, supportive or not, Jon’s never very quick with words of comfort, so he goes on. “I can’t complain – I mean, they’re nice! They’re really nice! It’s just… it’s not fun, feeling like the odd one out.”

Jon flashes him a grimace that Martin thinks is supposed to be commiserative but mostly just looks awkward. “For what it’s worth,” he says, “I also wish I was closer with Tim and Sasha. Things haven’t been the same since we transferred from Research. And it doesn’t help that they both know Sasha should have been promoted over me.”

Martin wants to reassure him, tell him that Elias must have promoted him for a reason, but he’s the last person who can argue that Elias always hires the most qualified person for the job.

“Anyway,” Jon says, “I know for a fact they like you. Have you just told them how you feel?”

“Have you?”

Jon smiles. “Alright, fair enough.”

The conversation moves on to lighter topics from there, and Martin almost forgets about it. But the next time 1 AM loneliness hits, it’s a relief to know that he isn’t the only one in the Archives who’s lonely.

Jon stays late every night the next week.

Martin knows Jon doesn’t want anyone chiding him, but he worries. He looks more and more worn out by the day, and Martin’s pretty sure he’s getting less work done for all the time he’s spending in the Archives.

When Martin wakes up from another nightmare (just a Prentiss nightmare this time, not a Prentiss-and-his-mother double feature) he doesn’t have to question if Jon’s around. When he checks his phone and sees that it’s well past 2 AM, some small, optimistic part of him thinks Jon might have gone home by now, but he isn’t at all surprised when he sees light spilling in from under the door in Jon’s office.

Jon doesn’t look up when Martin enters the room.

He looks rough. His head is resting in his hands, shoulders slumped, fingers wearily massaging his temples. When he hears the door click closed behind Martin, he finally looks up, and Martin can see that the dark circles under his eyes have gotten worse.

“Go home, Jon,” he says, and Jon shakes his head.

“I’m fine.”

“You need sleep.”

“I doubt I could get any sleep tonight regardless,” Jon says. “Insomnia, remember?”

“Well, try,” Martin says, patience waning. “Go home.”

“I can’t.” Jon’s voice is small and hoarse, and he sounds more vulnerable than he ever has in all their late-night chats.

“What do you mean, you can’t?”

“You were alone for two weeks, Martin,” he says, voice hushed as though he’s confessing something. “I can’t leave you alone like that again.”

Oh. Martin puts some pieces together. His boss has been running himself ragged, staying at work past 2 in the morning most days, because he’s convinced Martin can’t handle being alone at night. He thinks that Martin is a child in need of a security blanket, and has decided that the best course of action is to simply never leave work. It is, unfortunately, very sweet, but it’s also utterly humiliating.

“I can handle being alone!” he sputters, mortified beyond belief. “Believe me, I’ve had plenty of practice. I don’t need you to always be around. I-I know I said I get lonely sometimes, but, God, I’m not that pathetic.”

Jon frowns. “I don’t think you’re pathetic,” he whispers. “Believe me, Martin, that’s the last thing I think. I know I haven’t always been… fair to you. Or kind. Or even civil. If I had been fair to you, you wouldn’t be living in this basement.” He drops his gaze and addresses his next words to his hands. “It’s my fault you have to stay here,” he murmurs. “The very least I can do is ensure that you don’t have to stay here alone.”

Martin doesn’t know what to say to that. His brain cycles through several options and discards them all as insufficient. In the end, he decides to forgo words altogether. He stands up, reaches over, and pulls Jon out of his seat and into a hug.

Jon startles, and for a moment Martin thinks he’s made a horrible miscalculation, but then wraps his scrawny arms around his middle and squeezes tight.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers.

“I forgive you,” Martin says. “Now go home.”

That Friday, the four of them go out for drinks after work. It’s Martin’s idea, and he insists that they invite Jon. Tim and Sasha tell him it’s a lost cause – Jon’s never agreed to get lunch with them, he certainly won’t agree to drinks – but lo and behold, Jon agrees.

It’s awkward. Martin hasn’t left the Archives much since Prentiss, and he’s on high alert for worms, but he can’t deny that having his coworkers with him is a comfort. Sat around a sticky high-top table in a pub that smells like stale beer and fresh sweat, the conversation simply flows. Every now and then, the other three will laugh at some inside joke from their research days, but Jon always makes a point of bringing Martin up to speed.

Afterwards, Jon walks him back to the Archives. Martin is floating in a warm, hazy middle ground between ‘tipsy’ and ‘drunk,’ and Jon seems to be feeling much the same.

“I could stay, if you’d like,” Jon says.

“I’ll be fine,” Martin says.

When he makes it to the cot in Document Storage, he’s asleep the moment his head hits the pillow.

It would be nice, Martin thinks, if getting closer to people were the straightforward antidote to loneliness – if making friends were enough to stop him feeling so utterly friendless. But loneliness is never a simple thing, and some nights he still finds himself lying awake at night feeling like the last man on earth.

He checks the time. 1 AM. Naturally.

For the second time in a week, Jon doesn’t look up to see Martin when he enters the room. This time, he’s slumped over the desk, dead asleep.

He looks smaller, somehow, when he’s sleeping. His face is slack, the perpetual furrow in his brow is gone, and his hair is falling across his face in a way that leaves Martin itching to reach over and tuck it behind his ear. He looks cute, if Martin’s being entirely honest, but Jon’s only started being mostly-nice to Martin in the past two weeks or so, so Martin isn’t ready to be that honest with himself quite yet.

He reaches out a hand and gently shakes Jon’s shoulder.

“Jon.”

Jon stirs but doesn’t wake, so Martin shakes harder.

“Jon,” he repeats. No luck.

He sighs. He’s still wide awake, and he doubts that’s going to change any time soon. At least one of them should get some use out of the cot.

It’s surprisingly easy to pick Jon up. Jon stirs slightly as Martin scoops him into his arms, and for one terrifying second he thinks he’s going to wake up in Martin’s arms, but he doesn’t. Opening the doors to first the office and then Document Storage is more than a little tricky with his hands full, but he manages.

He sets Jon down on the bed as gently as he can, but Jon finally rouses as Martin tucks a blanket over his shoulders.

“Martin?” he mumbles, voice still thick with sleep.

“Go back to sleep, Jon.”

It doesn’t seem like Jon needs any encouragement. His eyes are already slipping closed again, but he manages to ask, “Will you be alright on your own?”

“Yeah,” Martin says, “I’ll be alright.”

And he means it.

(View this story on AO3)

#tma fanfic #tma fic #jonmartin fic #jmart fic #jmart fanfic #jonmartin fanfic #do not archive

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animeyanderelover · 1 year

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Anon: Hello! May I have 56 and 180 for Pakunoda?

Tw: Yandere themes, unhealthy mindset, unhealthy relationship, possessive behavior, obsession, abduction, threats

Prompt 56 + 180

You could hear the ticktack of her pink shoes, your heart beating in your throat whenever the sound came far too close, filling your lungs with paranoia. How did she even find you? Your best guess would be that she must have gotten help from some of her 'friends' or whatever they were? Her partners in crime? Yes, that sounded more likely.

"(y/n), darling, come out. I know that you're scared but let's talk about it. Running away won't get you anywhere."

She sounded calm, her voice soothing and trying to beckon you to reveal yourself willingly. If only her last sentence wouldn't have hold such a sinister and frightening implication, this all would have been much sweeter for you. Even then though, you wouldn't have left your hiding spot. Pakunoda had broken your trust, you had seen something you shouldn't have seen and this was the very reason why you were currently stuck in such a cramped space, your limbs twisted so that you could fit inside. Your muscles were everything but happy, sore and tired. The supply of fresh air was close to insufficient as you had closed the lid to hide yourself from her eyey better, sealing off your biggest source of fresh air which left you with troubled breaths, only adding to your growing fear.

One side of your head was pressed against the hard material as you followed Paku closely by tracking down the sound of her footsteps. You didn't want to risk peaking your head out, not as long as you could still hear her outside.

“Sweetheart…where are you hiding? I know you’re here. Come out, come out, wherever you are."

You gave her no reaction, only pressing yourself closer against the cold material. You couldn't hear anything though. She must have stopped walking around and searching for you, apparently waiting for a response from you. One you surely wouldn't give to her. Ten seconds passed. Twenty seconds passed. Thirty seconds passed.

You pressed your temple closer against the cold solid when you heard her releasing a deep breath as if attempting to not even lose an ounce of her composure. She always did that when anything or anyone threatened to break her patience. You were definitely getting to her though. The queasy sensation in your stomach made it difficult to decipher whether you thought of that as a good or as a bad thing. She was armed with a pistol whilst you were completely unarmed after all. As much as you didn't want to believe that she would ever shoot you, you weren't as sure anymore.

"Do you really want to play this game, (y/n)? It would be best for you if you don't complicate this situation any further."

You couldn't move very well due to the lack of space and out of fear that even the slightest movement could give you away but the change in her tone made you still shudder. Cold, detached with a sharp undertone to highlight her warning. Had you ever heard her speaking so icily before? You couldn't recall but it was hardly surprising. You had barely scratched the real Pakunoda after all and now you were walking on thin ice, threatening to shatter with each step you took.

There was no mistaking it though, this was the side of Pakunoda you had never seen before as she had carefully hidden it from you until you had witnessed it and had split the image she had so carefully kept those last two years. Another silence smothered you as the woman again gave you a bit of time to show yourself. She had always been so patient. The very trait you had used to adore and feel grateful though now only wracked your jittery nerves even more as you were desperately brainstorming how to flee unharmed. You couldn't come up with anything though as your mind blanked out, the sheer fear cutting every logical thought off.

"Nevermind then." she muttered gently as she exhaled collectedly, her composure intact and unshakable once again, a realization that made your stomach churn. Especially once she walked over to you, her footsteps getting closer and closer until she stopped. Right in front of you.

"I’ll find you anyways, I can hear your breathing.”

You didn't get any time to form a single thought on what to do, Pakunoda did not grant you the luxury to prepare yourself even slightly as she removed the top forcefully. The onslaught of light falling into the body was an assault on your vision as you shut your eyes tight, the echo of the lid falling onto the hard ground making you flinch. You blinked a couple of times to get your eyes used to the bright light before they focused on the woman who stood above you, an apathetic expression on her face you had rarely seen before. There was no way for you to escape though, not as long as you were stuck inside here with your whole body aching due to the unnatural position it was in.

"Did..." You had to pause your sentence as you swallowed the growing lump in the back of your throat down, although it provided little as it instantly pushed it's way back up. "Did you knew the entire time that I was here?"

"I did." was her short and precise answer, her unwavering eyes gazing down at you with such a foreign coldness that you had troubles properly breathing. You felt betrayed though as you felt like she had toyed with you the entire time. If she had known where you had been from the start, why had she not just taken you? Why toy with your feelings?

"If you knew, why didn't you just retrieve me from the very beginning?" you dared to ask her, your hurt audible in your shaky voice as your look mirrored your emotions.

"I wanted to give you a chance so that I could hopefully make things easier for you. You didn't head my advice though and instead ran away. You didn't listen to me back then either."

What did she just say? You were in disbelief when you heard her words. Was she blaming you for not having listened to her by going outside despite her warning?

"Are you trying to imply that I'm the one who messed everything up? Even when you were the one who lied to me the entire time? I'm not the murderer between the two of us! I have a right to be afraid and run away!" you nearly shouted, the audacity of her to even imply that it might be your fault triggering anger and disbelief inside of you.

You saw how she pursed her lips, your words definitely eliciting some sort of emotion out of her although you had troubles identifying what it was as she quickly masked her emotions behind her indifferent mask again, not giving you a chance to read her.

"It's true that I lied and kept my activities a secret from you but I only did that because I wanted to protect you from the truth. Now that you've seen everything though, I have no choice but introduce you to them. My boss has requested your presence to decide how to deal with you now that you know of my identity. That's why you have to come leisurely with me now because otherwise other members will come after you too if you try to escape any longer. Do not think that just because I won't hurt you, they wouldn't either."

Every word induced more and more fear inside of you as you shrinked, your body twisting until the back of your head was pressed uncomfortably against the bottom of the container, making Pakunoda look all the more intimidating. "What will happen to me now? Will I die? Like them?" you croaked out, tears starting to cover your eyes and blur your vision.

"No. I won't let them kill you. I'll just have to keep you somewhere for safety from now on so you won't be able to contact anyone. Only if you comply though because if you inform anyone, you'll be labeled a traitor and you can probably imagine what we do with traitors." There was a twist in her expression as she spoke the last sentence, a grim look that overtook her features shortly as if that thought stumbled across great unease inside of her.

She had no justification to feel that way though, not when it was your life that was at potential risk because of her right now. You could die, not her. Your resentment that started bubbling up deep inside your chest manifested itself on your face as you couldn't suppress the glare you shot at her, even if your current position and the tears inside your eyes took away some of the intimidation factors. You knew though that it was over now. You were done for.

She took notice of your attempted glare and reciprocated it with a stern glare of her own, far more convincing than the look you were giving her.

“Silly little thing. Don’t you realize that this is all your fault?”

#yandere hunter x hunter #yandere hxh #yandere pakunoda

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hushedstars · 11 months

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I didn't expect this episode to be sunshine and rainbows but neither did I expect it will leave me feeling exhausted, heavy, conflicted...

I'm not happy with how Atom's storyline was resolved. Everyone was way too nice to him. He deserved stern talking to. A powerpoint on how everything he made up was wrong, and dangerous, and how because of people like him the real victim's are not being heard. He didn't deserve that hug from Cheum. And she shouldn't be so calm and dare I say... amused and fond in a 'och you poor silly boy'. (I am still not sure what I think about what Boston and Nick did. I expected that they will use Nick's stalking skills and record their confrontation with him in which it would be obvious he is full of shit and lied, and then show it to Cheum and the rest or sth. But the ending of that confrontation? Again. Waaaay too nice.)

I don't like Mew's scene with his moms. This is purely personal to me but I'm sick of older generation being all for second chances and staying in relationships that are clearly not meant to be (as Top said, things that happened between them will always linger in the background). And while i don't like Top he is the one that I think could end up hurt later on. Relationship built on one person constantly groveling while having that tiny fear of being still strung along for revenge, and the other person fearing they may be cheated on again and still wanting to spite the other sounds exhausting. And unhealthy. There is no trust between them.

SandRay. Gosh I don't know what to say. I like drama in this show. It's fun. Boeing bringing his whole ass self into OF was really exciting to watch. But this? I wasn't having fun. I was exhausted, and stressed the more Sand was doing whatever he was doing (I want to think it's him missing a friend that shares all his hobbies or trying to be 'unbothered' to not show how hurt he was or maybe people-pleasing that makes him unable to hurt others/put himself first. Because I refuse to entertain the idea - and fail at it - that he is still hung up on Boeing when just 'seconds ago' he pretty much agreed with Ray that they both - SandRay - can't live apart. You can be friends with your ex, sure. But not one that hurt you like that, and seems to be hitting on you again. And sending your boyfriend away TWICE? What is he supposed to think... Just aghhh Sand.). Also feeling heavy with Ray's behaviour. The way he was testing (?) Sand just sat wrong with me. Do I maybe get it? I guess. (This post by @firstkanaphans ? my heart hurts) Did it hurt and was uncomfortable to watch? Especially with Sand looking like he wants to be anywhere else but there? Yes. Talk to each other boys. Of everything I thought may happen between Boeing, Sand and Ray this didn't even cross my mind.

(I'm suffering from lack of kisses between Sand and Ray. I don't mean making out and stuff but a peck for that guitar, and a petty 'stating my claim' peck when Ray left Sand with Boeing... just little kisses from finally happy - for five seconds - SandRay would have been nice.)

#only friends the series #only friends spoilers #only friends ep 11 #mine post #(the personal part: it reminded me of how my parents opinion made my little sister give 2nd chance to her trash boyfriend)#only friends sand #only friends atom #sand x ray #top x mew #i hope the link works #only friends

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the-healing-mindset · 2 months

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You can want the right things for the wrong people

In our lives, it is so easy for us to want to do whatever we can to help those around us. Some of those people we may know, some we may not. However, it is entirely possible that in some of those cases, we are wanting the right things for the wrong people. I know this probably sounds strange, but it's the truth.

What does it mean? Say you want someone in your life to see that a specific relationship is not good for them. You have told them this several times. Not only this, you have provided them with concrete evidence as to why they should not be in the situation that they are in. You want what is right for them. Despite this, they continue to do what they want, a large part of that is remaining in that unhealthy situation.

In truth, we want for those individuals is what we would want for ourselves if we were to be in the same situation. However, we don't get to choose for those individuals how they live their lives. We don't get to choose whether they choose to heal themselves toward a better life. Yes, we may want them to because we feel as if it would make them feel better and that it would make it easier to connect with them. Despite this, it is up to them what they choose to do and how they choose to live. It is up to us to decide how close to keep ourselves to that situation, especially if it is one that causes us pain.

#change #reminder #gentle reminder #healing #recovery #growth #advice #relationships #connections #control #self-awareness #mine #note to self

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squishmallow36 · 1 year

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It's all I wish to hear tonight, and you're all I wish to be, and this is how we all fall down - Chapter Three

Summary: Garvarioli but it's Alvar's character arc in Flashback and Legacy. Also please send help I accidentally made a character arc out of disconnected oneshots.

Word Count: 3040

TW: swearing, Alvar's troll goop illness, death

Taglist (lmk if you want to be added/removed!): @stellar-lune @faggot-friday @kamikothe1and0lny @nyxpixels @florida-preposterously @poppinspop @uni-seahorse-572 @solreefs @remember-me-in-another-time @rusted-phone-calls @when-wax-wings-melt @good-old-fashioned-lover-boy7 @dexter-dizzknees @abubble125 @hi-imgrapes @callum-hunt-is-bisexual @xanadaus @callas-pancake-tree @hi-my-name-is-awesome @katniss-elizabeth-chase @arson-anarchy-death @dizzeners @thefoxysnake @olivedumdum

And bonus Garvar tags: @tw-5 @camelspit

On Ao3 (users only because, you know, AI) or below the cut

Previous chapter :) in case you missed it

Garwin stares up at his ceiling, watching the fan slowly rotate around. Yes, he gets blinded by the light being on at the center, but that’s preferable to reloading his Imparter screen every two seconds for an update from Alvar.

No less than three hours ago, he got summoned by Fintan, and the last time he was gone this long, he brought back a kid. That better not happen again.

Garwin doesn’t have the patience to deal with a child. Or Ruy. It’s basically the same thing, but at least Ruy can scavenge for his own meals most of the time.

He may have developed an unhealthy habit of going to the Forbidden Cities and flexing his extensive Spanish vocabulary at least three times a week, but, hey, at least he brings food home most of the time, so Garwin can’t complain.

How he’s able to get food with an addler on is also questionable. As is how he acquired human money to pay for it, cause it sure as hell ain’t coming from Garwin’s extremely broke bank accounts.

With that thought, the sound of a correct Duolingo answer echoes through the silent room. However annoying it may be, it keeps Ruy entertained, so, once again, Garwin can’t complain.

But sometimes he does anyway.

“Have you lost your headphones again?”

“No. I know right where they are. I just can’t move to get them with someone laying on top of me.”

That is a valid point, which is why it should be ignored at all costs.

“Oh no! Whomever could that be?” Garwin asks, shifting to his side to snuggle in closer. And stare at Ruy. Both things that are very important to do.

He’s so pretty.

Garwin may very well have dozed off much to Ruy’s dismay, because the next thing he knows, the orange light of sunset is shimmering through the windows.

Ruy and Alvar are deep in conversation, speaking in low voices presumably not to disturb him.

Ruy ruffles his hair. “Good evening, mi corazón.”

Garwin yawns. “What did I miss?”

Alvar opens his mouth to explain, but Ruy beats him to it. “Your boyfriend told Finny about his batshit amnesia plan.”

“Oh, he’s my boyfriend now? Why do I always have to deal with him when he’s being an idiot?”

“Because you didn’t get accepted to Yale.” Ruy presses a kiss to Garwin’s temple.

Garwin rolls his eyes. The first time it was funny. The 8123rd time? Significantly less so. Half of those were his own self-deprecating jokes, so he does share some of the blame, but that’s less satisfying than projecting his problems onto everyone else.

Garwin looks at Alvar. “You do realize this is a really, really fucking bad idea, right?”

“Alden’s hiding something. Unless you have a better plan, I’ve had more than enough of that man’s bullshit. Whatever the ‘Vacker Legacy’ entails, I’m sure it’s going to be messy, and I think the trade off is more than worth it.”

“What if you’re fucked up irreparably? What if something goes wrong with your memories?”

“Bold of you to assume I’m not already fucked up irreparably, and, well, I fell in love with y’all the first time. I’ll do it again if I have to.”

That’s the exact kind of answer Garwin was hoping he wasn’t going to answer.

That’s the exact kind of answer that isn’t going to take any form of criticism. And once Alvar has his mind set on something, it might be possible to stop him, but Garwin hasn’t figured out how yet and it’s unlikely he ever will.

Garwin looks at Ruy. “Bitch, I don’t know.”

Ruy stres into his soul, betrayal etched into every line. “Dude. You were supposed to fix him. Fix him. Make him, I don’t know, not an idiot?”

“What do you want me to do? I can’t convince him to do shit. I can’t even convince him to give me the fucking remote.”

This is a real, actual issue Garwin has to go through every single day. He suffers so much for it. He’s the human here, and it’s not like any of the intelligent species produce their own TV shows or movies or whatever. He’s the only one with any personal experience watching human media his entire life, and yet that isn’t enough to dictate what is and is not watched.

“Well, to be fair, your taste in movies is horrendous.”

“That’s not fair. That’s not fucking fair at all. And now out of spite I am going to leave you two to your own devices.”

He could choose to worry about Alvar, but worrying won’t accomplish anything. So might as well go along with his dumb shit because then at least you can have an idea of what he’s doing.

Then when he realizes he’s bad at making life choices, you can tell him I told you so.

And then you’re the moral high ground.

…At least until you do something stupid. And so the cycle continues.

The first week without him, it’s just like he’s on a normal Neverseen mission. Well, at least normal in comparison to other things they’ve done.

Gisela took over again, Sophie and co. fucked up Atlantis. The usual. Actually, technically, Ruy undid the force fields and Sophie found a hydrokinetic friend to just like. Hold the water in place. Because that makes logical sense. Fluid physics definitely works like that. But Garwin chooses to blame Sophie because he can.

One of the very few times Garwin wishes there was some form of news or social media in the cities is when Alvar is found by the Bullshit and promptly scheduled for a tribunal. You know, completely normal shit.

It’s ruled that he’s going to get to go back to Everglen. Which was the goal. So that is a good thing. Even if Garwin isn’t too excited about it because Fitz is probably going to slit Alvar’s throat in his sleep.

Why are the elves so pretentious that they have to name their houses? Eh, whatever. It’s probably more effort to ask than it’s worth.

At least it’ll be fun watching Mr. Golden Boy Vackerpants getting himself banished again or Exiled. Unmapped stars, that would be so fucking hilarious.

The real trouble with Alvar being gone is that it keeps going for literal fucking months on end.

Him moving in got postponed because Umber needed to practice with their shadowflux bending with actual people and, well, Sophie and Fitz were good targets. At least it can still be on schedule for the Lunar festival thing that happens during the lunar eclipse.

Ruy definitely didn’t have lasting damage from seeing that. Definitely. If elves are supposed to break when they see blood and/or gore, he should be so far gone he doesn’t know where he started, but maybe he’s just cool like that. Or the exilium training did that. Or the Neverseen has made him desensitized to things.

Or watching Sharknado every time Garwin manages to claim the remote…maybe Alvar and Ruy have a point about his choice in media to consume.

Nah. They just don’t understand the concept of so-bad-it’s-funny.

The Second One--no, seriously, that’s the subtitle--in all of its horrific magnificence comes out while Alvar is notably still absent, and while it may be sacrilege to watch it without him, the sharknado is too strong and Garwin is too weak to resist temptation.

The Celestial Festival finally comes on October seventh and eighth because nights do that sometimes so long as google is to be trusted to know what day it is.

But what happens during the Celestial Festival is nowhere near according to plan, instead being filled with fucked up troll babies.

Garwin is assigned the job of floating around in the crowd at the festival itself because he’s a useless pathetic human, so he gets the privilege of watching both of his boyfriends risk their lives in glorious technicolor.

Ruy escapes unharmed aside from a bit of splatter from Umber and a shit ton of inevitable nightmares, but Alvar is another story.

In all of the chaos, his memories are returned, so he’s left to figure all that shit on his own while avoiding mutant trolls, both the newly hatched ones and the ones named Fitz.

And it turns out, the one named Fitz is the one to watch out for. Who would have thought? This would have been a great time for an I told you so if it wasn’t so fucking terrifying.

Garwin starts praying to every single god he can think of, from human ones to the entire fucking troll pantheon and even Ogdy of the gnomes because apparently they have their own tree god thing, not just the magic four seasons tree thing.

If there’s such a being that can control the fate of the universe like that, he hopes it has a sense of humor because that’s the only way out of this.

He ignores Gisela’s screeching and leaps to Candleshade--their pre-discussed meeting place should shit go down--because shit has most certainly gone down and begins pacing. It’s not long before Ruy arrives, but it could’ve been hours for how long it felt.

Hours feel like years until the first rays of dawn begin flickering across the horizon and a troll goopy Alvar-shaped mound shambles toward them.

Garwin won’t admit it, but tears escape his eyes when he sees Alvar and tackles him in a hug that probably was a bad idea in hindsight.

A shower and a hot meal can do a lot to revitalize a person. That being said, the hot meal is Kraft mac and cheese, so it’s not exactly the most homecooked of meals, but it's better than burning a kitchen down. Even if Keefe would absolutely fucking love seeing its childhood home burned to the ground, it’s much more fun when the arson is intentional.

There’s no way to tell how bad the reaction from the Neverseen will be or if they’re even technically members anymore after everything that’s gone down. So, being the semi-responsible one of them by comparison, Ruy figures they should stock up on food, and that means human food because the gnomes are still pissed about the whole attempted genocide thing.

Which, in all fairness, does make sense.

While he’s gone, Garwin and Alvar make themselves at home by borrowing into one of the bedrooms, becoming so blanket burritoed it’s likely they’ll never be seen again.

Garwin cups his hand to Alvar’s cheek, whispering, “I’m glad you’re not dead.”

Alvar presses a soft kiss to his lips. “Thanks.”

Normally he’d be full of sarcasm, but this time it’s genuine and that scares Garwin more than he’d like to admit.

Because once the sardonic walls are gone, then actual emotions may have to be accessed, and that’s not fun.

“How are you doing? Considering everything?”

“Great.”

He’s fine. That means he’s fine.

It’s easier thought than believed though.

Alvar elaborates, “I mean I couldn’t really figure out why my brother hated my guts so much the entire time I had zero memories or why the fuck Darek was so hot because apparently I forgot gay was an option.”

Garwin laughs, remembering the near-fistfight that ensued between Ruy and Alvar over which of the councillors is most fuckable and let’s just say it became a forbidden topic. And also good motivation for taking the government down because they aren’t fucksble until that stupid no relationships rule is abolished.

Well, technically, nothing happens so long as you don’t get caught, but that’s beside the point.

And for the record, Darek’s the hot one. Ruy can suck Terik’s dick but that doesn’t change the truth.

“Lots of confusion overall. Still trying to put the pieces back together because they are nowhere near chronological order. Also feeling a lot of emotions in this Chili’s tonight and it’s been a while since I’ve had emotions so I’m still trying to deal with that.”

“Would you like me to go harass some other room in this place?”

“No!” he answers, too loud and too fast, terror shining in his eyes.

Garwin takes his hand, squeezing gently.

Alvar takes a shaky breath. “Don’t leave me alone. I don’t want--I can’t think about being in that place again. You’re a good distraction.”

“Everglen or the Troll hive?”

“Yes.” Alvar smirks. “Both of them have my murderous little brother, so is there really that much of a difference? Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m proud of him for willing to do what needs to be done, but that anger can be aimed in a better direction.”

“I feel like it would be funny if you were like ‘I lived, bitch’ and then sent him ideas of how to be more of an anarchist.”

Alvar smiles--the first since his return. “Hey, Fitz, I know you tried to kill me but here’s a to-do list. One: realize like half your anger is just repressed queerness and you’re pissed because I have two whole boyfriends and you’ve got that probably comphet whatever the fuck is going on with Sophie. Two: fuck up that matchmaking system because damn the eugenics are strong with this one. Three: figure out how to ask out that Dex kid you were so insistent about for reasons likely related to item one. Four: profit.”

“Is the Dex kid the strawberry blond that’s for some reason friends with the Sophie?”

“Good job, you remembered one person’s name. I’m proud of you.”

He’s only at three-quarters the normal sarcasm level, which is, once again, honest-to-god terrifying.

He just needs time. Everything will be fine. He’s had a long day. He’ll be his usual asshole self in no time.

It’s just hard to not worry when he’s been gone for so incredibly fucking long.

What if something during that time has messed him up? He doesn’t seem to care that his brother literally tried to kill him, but what if he’s simply in denial? What will it be like when it becomes real?

What if Alden’s presence made him regress back into the closet? Nah. He seems just as gay as ever. That’s the only thing Garwin has any confidence in.

What about the council? They kept him in their prison for weeks on end and there’s no telling how many violations of the Geneva convention they could’ve committed, even despite the elves’ supposed inability to process violence.

Those councillors could’ve just wiped their own memories afterwards, and no one would be the wiser. Or used Goblins. And if Alvar chose to come forward about it--which seems unlikely now that he has his memories, he’d instead use it as fuel for his villain backstory--it would be his word against theirs, a surefire way to lose a legal battle.

“Hey, don’t hurt yourself. Think any harder and you might have smoke coming out your ears.”

See? Right there? He’s fine. But, once again, easier thought than believed.

He was fine after Dimitar’s torture, he’ll be fine after this. That’s what Garwin has to convince himself. Because he can’t let himself imagine what it means otherwise.

Alvar drifts off to sleep, and Garwin spends a long time studying his face, etching every last detail into his mind. His long eyelashes, his unusually unkempt hair, the stubble that’s just barely starting to make itself visible. His shamkniv scars.

He’s been through more shit than elves are supposed to be able to go through, but he’s still here.

And the cherry on top: he’s still an ass.

He is all right, at first. He’s all right for weeks. Some may argue that he’s even more insufferable than usual, but that could just be because both Ruy and Alvar became used to not having to deal with his snark every day.

Although, to be fair, they have had to tolerate each other, so it wasn’t that much of a break. It’s just funny when Alvar drops some deranged bullshit that’s a direct consequence of growing up with Alden. Like his stories of traveling in the human world. Man’s a fucking professional con artist to feed his caffeine addiction.

And then he starts to slow down, unnoticeably at first but accelerating faster than anyone would like to admit, taking more time to climb up the stars, his appetite going to shit, having a normal sleep schedule for once in his life. The occasional nap.

Garwin can see in Ruy’s eyes that he’s noticed the same things, but maybe if they don’t talk about it, it doesn’t exist.

By the time Sophie and Keefe come crashing over to look for god knows what, Alvar is barely strong enough to light leap. How he doesn’t completely fade away is anyone’s guess.

Garwin wishes he could just duct tape all of Alvar’s particles-cells-molecules-quarks together, but apparently that’s not how that works. Also duct tape probably wouldn’t be a safe choice for keeping an organic lifeform’s parts together, but that’s less of a concern.

And they’ve all simply agreed to not talk about it via the lack of talking about it because they’re all firmly in the first stage of grief and not going anywhere anytime soon.

To someone who hasn’t gone through losing a whole ton of people in his life, Garwin can’t help but draw parallels to when his grandfather passed away about a year before he came to the lost cities.

Three weeks in the hospital.

The day-to-day details are fuzzy, even having hope most of the time, unlike with Alvar. But Garwin never went to see his grandfather. His parents wanted to protect him or something. But that’s a luxury he can’t afford this time, watching Alvar slowly decay like a zombie in front of his eyes.

There has to be a cure or a treatment or something we can do. This is elvin medicine for fuck’s sake! They always advertize how advanced they are compared to humans, but they can’t fucking fix this so what’s the point?

I’d give anything for him to be alright. I don’t care what it takes.

I got a lot of people I can blame.

And Sophie, you better believe you aren’t going to fucking take anything else from me.

#kotlc #kotlc fanfic #kotlc alvar #alvar vacker #kotlc ruy #ruy ignis #kotlc garwin #garwin chang #garvar #garvarioli #tw swearing

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marengogo · 2 years

Text

NAKED - 5: The Occurrence and Development of Events by Chance in a Happy or Beneficial Way [PART 1].

Oh No! by Mindy Gledhill [Pocketful of Poetry]

[Music is a very big part of my life and I’m MOSTLY INCAPABLE of writing without music, so I just thought I'd share what I am listening to while writing this]

–🐺–🐺–🐺–

On November 21, 2022, when JK safely returned to South Korea from Qatar, I first, and foremost, thanked whatever Superior Being is out there like I always do whenever someone I care about gets on a plane, including myself. Then, I awkwardly smiled at myself accepting the fact that:

Yup. We wait. We wait because Jikook have this interesting pattern, from circa 2019, where they go dead silent whenever they are at a close radius from each other, but start becoming very social and SM savvy when apart. And yes, the company, and even the members, will upload videos, pictures, etc, with them in it, together or individually, almost as if to say “they are alive and well!”; but not them.

Jikook will not upload anything, when they are at a close radius. Even JK, who likes to interact with his members on IG, will do so, but will not interact with ARMY or any non-band related activity. At least not that I’ve noticed. But that’s just my own observation, don’t mind me. Anyways, because I’ve had a shitty week and I seemed to be painfully missing them, I decided to sit my ass down, and between Netflix shows, life and unhealthy snacking, I began to write a “Story”.

A peculiar story of two ordinary, but not so ordinary, young men. An ongoing story collecting unbelievably cute, and sometimes rather extraordinary, facts. A based-on-real-facts story, very much built on the occurrence and development of events by chance in a happy or beneficial way, otherwise also known as; Serendipity.

Hence, as every respectable book, I'll begin with providing you with the following table of contents:

[PROLOGUE] - 35.1796°N, 129.0756°E

[CHAPTER 1] - Lucky Number 13

[CHAPTER 2] - The Dancer who could Sing & The Singer who could Dance

[CHAPTER 3] - Just Let Me Love You … Please Love Me

[END OF MY STORY] - Thinking. Loving. Clicking.

Great! So Let's start now, shall we?

・35.1796°N, 129.0756°E

The planet is Earth, the coordinates are 35ish degrees North, 129ish degrees East, and the dates are two: October 13, 1995 and September 1, 1997. During these two particular sets of dates, two boys, who’s destinies would be almost magically intertwined, were born. Because of them and five others, life would never be the same for many citizens on planet Earth, but even more specifically, for the boys themselves.

Now, even though both families had quite different backgrounds and life scenarios, coincidentally, they raised the boys within environments that were very loving and which fostered and encouraged freedom of expression and self though “one’s self” is very hard to grasp at the very beginning stages of your life. Nevertheless, at first glance, the boys grew up to be almost quite the opposite of each other. For example the older boy, Park Jimin (JM), shaped himself into becoming quite versed in plenty of disciplines, on top of becoming a model student. He would also turn out to be an extrovert who didn’t believe in fate.

On the other hand the younger one, Jeon Jungkook (JK), who also was unbelievably talented and had interest in a plethora of activities, would not find much interest in academics. He’d then be known to be quite the introvert with a deep believe in fate.

I know what you are thinking 😌… It sounds exactly like the plot of that one guilty pleasure coming-of-age romance we all REALLY love to read/watch maybe secretly, doesn't it? The one where the geeky girl/boy/enby end up with the badass girl/boy/enby after meeting at their worst but deciding to stay together for an unforeseen best. But this is most definitely how this story begins. Coincidence? Fate? Who knows right? Now, if we were to take a step further and imagine them as “complete polar opposites”, Angel & Demons if you may, and mind you, do not be fooled by the intrinsic nature of said beings there’s plenty of devilish angels and goodwilled demons, at this point, you might be wondering:

How did this ethereal genius 👆🏾manage to cross paths with this underworld prodigy 👇🏾?

And now back to reality. Basically, how did an extrovert nonbeliever manage to connect with an introvert believer? Well, being that they were born and did live at the same set of coordinates, 35.1796°N, 129.0756°E, also known as Busan, they must have bumped into each other at some point. Right? I mean this would be the obvious “encounter scenario” in this movie genre. Right?

Wrong..

Eventually, in the Spring of 2011, JK would travel all the way to the capital, Seoul, in order to begin the pursuit of his own dreams, and so would JM, in Spring of 2012, a whole year later. As fate, or chance, would want it, their dream-chasing destination would lead them to the exact same destination: Big Hit Entertainment. There, they would join 5 other talented boys and, unbeknownst to them, would ultimately become one of the biggest group of all time.

Anyways, let me go ahead and post this, because 1899 is regrettably for all of you HELLA INTERESTING and I really wanna watch a couple of episodes more 😬😬. As for the rest of the chapters, I do believe I want to write it all in the next post (or maybe 2 posts max) and if luck wants it to be so, it might be later on today! But I won’t let you wait for too long at least I’ll try not to.

So for now, I just saw that Taekook's RUN BTS challenge has just been uploaded, so let's go and enjoy that! (... even in the darkness of it all, Tae looks like a snacc NGL).

Always respectfully yours 🫰🏾💜,

Marengo.

#Jikook #JKK NAK #A Jikook “Story”#JK #JM #JKK's Serendipitous Story

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hydralisk98 · 1 year

Text

Just a heads-up for speculative biology

While I am still researching and seeking ways to incorporate even more flavour into 16^12 as a documentation atlas / encyclopedia-worthy setting guide overall (especially over alternative technologies, linguistics & cultures), I figured that a bunch of people could really appreciate some more speculative biology resources, games and a handful of considerations / suggestions over lesser-known topics of world building related to such worth considering.

Starting by providing external resources with a couple YouTube channels and some other related resources:

There are way more, but those should give you great insight into the process of speculative contemporary biology as we are aware of right now.

Now, as for my own suggestions, beware that they mostly pertain to foreign time-wise "ecological niches" if you even can call such existential domains that. Either mythologically-inclined, automated lively constructs or literally far, far ahead in time.

Cosmogony & early mundane life suggestions

For ease of reach, I will use the Christian + Hellenistic Classical Greece mythology as a referee guide for meta-physical representation. Could be any mythos, invented or real, it is all true if you count the whole of existence for all I care. But that specific one is one that most people here reading this would know of.

So the creation of the Universe, Earth, Eden and the War in Heaven between Lucifer and Saint-Michael (so not the Apocalyptic scripts, that's custom-tailored flattery fan-fiction by my worldview but whatever...) feels like a logical progression of steps where a root system (some call it God, I call it the existential root likewise to how it is shown on Linux he-he-he) divides themself into smaller and smaller units (first into grander agents and going ever so smaller down to the smallest of axioms...), and then those divide the world into domains of their choosing and executing roles / functions across the wider cosmos...

Sounds like a computer bootstrap process, doesn't it? Well yes, but it is also akin to the ecological niches and adaptation process of what we are most aware of as life that you can emulate and customize as you wish to if you so desire.

You can also extrapolate / interpolate from such a divine / ethereal starting point and make them have all kinds of children species, automata and lifeforms. I would advise going through an "Angelic Constructs" to "Transformers" route for the first mundane plane lifeforms, kinda similar in agency and functionality as our early analogical robotics, both emulating the process of a child learning by playing with toys and also starting very simplistic (like how the simple rules of a cellular automaton like Conway's Game of Life may result in very complex behaviours on the grid) until they build on top of each other significantly.

But you can do whatever you so desire, as the reference model does divide some of the upper tier angelic court beings into themes or existential roles (and does the same for those of whom from such who became upper level Hell governors). It is simply a strong recommendation to emulate the iterative process of life and agency, as that builds a strong world-building cohesion and nuanced depth to the set of variables you tinker with as a creative, engaging people further into its intricacies.

Elderly universe

As I apply the same rules over and over again, I tend to figure historical patterns (likewise to those of sound-tracker's music) and re-utilize the content I enjoy most where relevant. That's part of my research and iterative process. And it turns out that as I feel (and went through several psychic experiences) around and about far futures, it mostly sticks to some vague approximate guesses I make.

Granted, I will definitely make use of some mystery, secrets and quantum choice principles across for the things I am really out-of-reach for knowing, but I can give you some subjective tips of mine to derivate cosmically far futures that both works realistically and feel great to tell exaggerated stories over. (Not always needs to invoke eldritch by any means too, I prefer to give a more nihilistic-optimistic yet esoterically-grounded take on things because I am somewhat tired of dark and dire traumatisms-centric stories of contemporary times)

First, I persist into assuming there are sapient lifeforms (mechanical and divine ones are guaranteed) of some kind across the full spectrum of time. Granted, I have bold vision even for humans and other fully biological intelligent folks to survive even past the red dwarves' major era death into the iron stars period, even without involving much use of magic in the setting period. But it is worth keeping somewhat because entirely lone sapient individuals in such a late era don't exist in a vacuum and needs a few things to persist there for longer than a couple of minutes.

Second, on the same vain I tend to have at least one major native species of this time-wise era either they are time-travelling dwellers, timeless beings or just sapient individuals who stuck around as species for that long. It really gives a vibe of being so elderly as a universe, with cultures, languages, history, knowledge and nuances worth investigating. It is a mechanic I will take full advantage of into my very own worldbuilding if you are curious.

Third, consider realistically "conservative" (as in, with the least change involved) estimates of history, entropy and perhaps timely tourism into consideration for your world(s) and interpolate relevant data for such as needed. There are still going to be changes across the board in the broad spectrum of time, but I would guess that somewhen things will settle down (or at least lower the variation / valence and quiet somewhat more compared to the current cosmos we live in) as the universe becomes less habitable for our definition of life, which are really intricately complex and sophisticated lifeforms.

It really goes to show that if one can imagine / ask a question about anything, it is real somewhere in the whole of existence (perhaps you prefer calling it an omniverse, but not me). And, in this instance, that reinforces the notion that there may be a handful of tourists into the edge periods of time present for all sorts of reasons, no matter how sparse or few of them there may be. Also, it applies the other way around too, especially as my story has a certain emphasis unto a (younger than the elderly majority peers, aka a late teenager / young adult) character agent who wraps back in time for quite mundane reasons really...

Thanks for reading this messy info dump (initially meant to be a shorter article production than the other articles I had in my drafts, oups...) and I wish you good luck.

#youtube #speculative evolution #speculative biology #maskoch #worldbuilding #world building #mythos #mythology #mythopoeia

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sunny6677 · 2 years

Text

THE AUDIO LOGS OF ANDREW HUDSON.

SUMMARY: The following are real audio tapes of tapes left by an animator at the forgotten studio Joey Drew Studios. Please ensure that you are ready to listen with these with caution, dear listener. What you may hear may cause you to never want to hear again. What you may picture may make you never want to see again. Please be aware of the consequences you may have if you do not have permission to listen to these tapes. If not permitted, then [REDACTED]. You have been warned.

(This is fiction btw, so no worries-- I know some people with anxiety issues might think this is real so this is just a clarification.)

TW FOR CHAPTER/TAPE: NONE.

TW FOR SERIES: MANIPULATION, TRANSFORMATION, UNHEALTHY MINDSET, OBSESSIONS, CULTS, CULT MENTIONS, MURDER.

-----------------------------

TAPE #10.

THE VOICE OF SAMMY LAWRENCE & JOEY DREW.

A FEW DAYS AFTER THE 9TH TAPE, 1933.

----------------------------

J: "So, Sammy! How's the music business coming along?"

S: [SIGHS] "Its been going.. slow. Tunes do take a long time to complete when you hope each note lingers with utmost perfection, you know?"

J: "Hoho! I understand. If i didn't, I wouldn't correct you on some of your parts in the songs you know! I'm not even a composer, yet even I know when there has to be limits, Sammy."

S: [QUIET] "Yes, but you do this every time.. they're my songs, not yours."

J: "What was that?"

S: "N— Nothing. No need to worry, Joey. I'll have them completed by the end of today, I promise. There's only two more to go and it should all be done.."

J: "Haha, I hope so! You know how impatient I can be!"

S: "Oh, believe me, I know.."

[WHAT SOUNDS TO BE A DOOR OPENING PLAYS IN THE DISTANCE. TWO PEOPLE WHO SEEM TO BE ANDREW HUDSON AND WALLY FRANKS ARE FAINTLY TALKING IN THE DISTANCE, BUT THE RECORDING CAN NOT PICK UP THEIR CONVERSATION.]

S: "Oh, great, those two.."

J: "Oh hey, Mr. Hudson and Mr. Franks! Wonder what they're doing in here."

S: "Probably them meaninglessly wondering around like fools again... god, if they don't leave this instant, I'm gonna get a headache."

J: "Eh, they always do that. Ever since that dinner they've become closer than ever. Wonder what even happened."

S: "Well.. the janitors certainly become more cheerful since he started hanging out with that moron. I didn't even know that they had a dinner.."

J: "Yeah, the two formed a tight bond after that. I even saw them at the place theirself— they both seemed real cozy together. For the first time in forever, Mr. Franks seemed like he was enjoying himself."

S: [SIGHS] "He certainly does seem to be enjoying himself. But it's not like that matters, especially when he keeps losing those damn keys over and over again.. I'd like to be left to work without him knocking on my door for at least a day."

J: "Eh.. we both know that's not going to happen, people 'round here seem to have a routine. No matter what happens, they'll stick to it. And you have a routine of staying tightly locked in your room and not moving a muscle.."

S: "Whats that supposed to mean?"

J: "Oh, nothing.."

[ANDREWS VOICE IS FAINTLY HEARD IN THE DISTANCE, WHAT SOUNDS TO BE HIM SAYING "Hey, Mr. Drew!" OR "Hello, Mr. Drew!" PLAYS IN THE DISTANCE.]

J: "Hey, Mr. Hudson! What are ya doin' away from your desk?.. You finished already? Huh.. guess I couldn't expect less from you. You really do finish.. incredibly fast don't you?"

S: "He's.. already finished? That— that shouldn't be humanly possible—"

J: "Well, I've seen it! It'll only be 2 hours and the next thing I know there'll be a bunch of the assigned frames I wanted him to draw. I say, it is quite remarkable! He could even replace Henry with his odd technique."

S: "Well, whatever.. I'm going back to my office. If I can't escape them here, then I'm going to go elsewhere."

J: "Huh, well, okay— let me know when your finished with those tunes, why don't ya?"

S: "I will, Joey, I will.. just give me time, for God's sake."

[9 SECONDS OF SILENCE GO BY.]

J: "Hmm.. say, little audio log, ya think Sammy'll end up liking Andrew as much as Mr. Franks does?"

[SILENCE.]

J: "Welp.. I guess fate will decide that. In the mean time, I should be getting back to his office. I oughta see if he'll do a wrong note or part again after all."

---------------------------

NOTES: THIS AUDIO LOG WAS FOUND TIGHTLY PACKED INSIDE OF JOEYS OFFICE. THE RESEARCHERS ARE CURRENTLY DISCUSSING WHETHER JOEY WAS THE ONE WHO HID THE AUDIO LOG OR NOT. AND ARE DISCUSSING THE REASON WHY HE WOULD DO SO ANYWAY.

#batdr #batim #batim x oc #sammy lawrence #sammy lawrence batim #sammy lawrence batdr #read the tws #andrew hudson #joey drew #joey drew batim #joey drew batdr

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