#and- for that matter- that the Hulk’s life is worth less than Bruce’s because he’s not as ‘intelligent’?

[daydreamerdrew]

The Hulk! (1978) #14

[wannabe-fic-writer]

All Over Again - Chapter 1

Summary: What was lost can be found. - DC & Marvel AU

Pairings: Lena x Reader ; Implied Natasha x Reader ; Platonic!Avengers x Reader ; Platonic!Superfriends x Reader 

Warning: 18+ Smut, Language, Violence

* * * * * *

Sighing, you splay yourself out on the grass, looking up at the distorted view of the sky as the red leaves of the tree above you sway. The gentle breeze sends a chill over your skin but it’s much too calming for you to move.

“Am I going to have to start carrying jackets around with me again?”

The familiarly sultry voice meets your ears over the sounds of nature. It makes your heart thump faster like it always had but this time an ache accompanies it. Her joking tone holds an underlying nervousness and you have to resist the urge to scoff at the drastic change in your conversations together. 

You could never forget the moment everything shifted. Your entire relationship with Natasha fell to pieces. All the love and trust that had grown stronger each year that you were together seemed to mean nothing to her suddenly.

Months on the run from the U.S. government, planning your futures together, it blew to hell in literal seconds. 

Everything you’d grown to know and love was pulled out from underneath you with three simple words: Hi, Bruce. Followed by the awkward pause and nervous, Nat.

Hope rose in your girlfriend’s eyes and you were unsure why. The main reason being that you were recruited by Fury during the Sokovia incident. You never met the infamous Bruce Banner turn Hulk, and didn't know about his history with your girl. And Natasha hadn’t found it necessary to tell you about it either.

Which left you in the dark and completely blindsided by Natasha’s decision to end things with you. Simply telling you she owed it to herself to see where things with Bruce went. And you being the person you are and loving Natasha the way that you do, you wanted her to be happy despite your heartbreak. 

All of that rested on your shoulders at the same time that Thanos appeared. Your broken heart seemed to shatter further when you lost your best friend Wanda and the many friends you’d gained. 

For five years you hurt. Grieving your lost friends and dealing with your broken heart. It seemed as though Natasha breaking up with you wasn’t even worth it as Banner left after Thanos and they didn’t see each other for five years.

Even after the five years though, you still were coping with your heartbreak despite the Avengers having gotten rid of Thanos for good. As you then had the privilege of seeing Natasha and Bruce together. And you could admit that they look good together, happy. 

Which means you need to find your own. You just aren’t sure how. 

You take a deep breath and look up at the redhead who’s watched you in your silence.“ I hadn’t planned on staying out here long so I didn’t grab one.” You respond, deciding to ignore her not so subtle hint at your relationship and personal quirk. 

Jackets are just the last thing you think about before you leave out and Natasha used to take it upon herself to bring one for you whenever you were with her. 

She smiles tightly and nods,“ okay. Well I was just coming to let you know that Steve and Bucky are almost done with dinner.”

When you nod in answer Natasha waits, silently debating if she wanted to say anything else or not, but chose not to and finally walked away. You waited a few extra minutes before pushing yourself up and heading toward the compound.

As you’re walking up to the door, your red leather clad friend lands beside you, her magic vanishing from her hands before she flings her arms around you. 

“Hello to you too.” You chuckle, hugging her back. 

Wanda smiles brightly,“ hi.” 

A small smile of your own hitting your lips. You’d missed the young woman as she was away on a mission with Sam. They weren’t far, just on the East Coast, but they’d been gone for a week, which was more than enough for you to begin to miss her.

Before either of you step into the building, she grabs your hand and laces your fingers together, gently tugging you off to the side. Soft light green eyes stare back sympathetically,“ how are you?” 

“Wan-” you sigh, running a hand up and through your hair.

“I’m just worried about you.” A little pout hits her lips followed by a joking smile,“ and I’m kind of the only reason you’re sane.”  

You throw your head back with a laugh. Then shaking your head and wrapping an arm around her shoulders,“ I’m fine Wanda. Thank you for the concern and sanity.”

Placing a quick kiss to her temple, you guide her into the building, more than happy to have your best friend back.

Like Natasha had told you, Steve and Bucky already have the table set and everyone is sitting around. No matter how hard you try, your gaze finds Bruce and Natasha, the man leans over to say something to her and a cute smile rises, reminding you of the one you’d caused her to have before. 

A squeeze of your hand pulls your eyes away and you nod to Wanda before sitting down beside her. Usual chatter circles the table, Sam and Wanda talking a bit about the mission briefly, and then asking all of you about what’s been going on. 

By the end of dinner you’re a mix of annoyed and happy. Your friends had made you laugh and smile just like usual, except every time you got lost in the joy of it all you forgot what was across from you and your gaze caught the image of Natasha and Bruce flirting, laughing, and smiling. It makes you so upset that you still wish it were you with her.

It’s been six years! What happens to time heals all wounds? Was that just a load of shit? Would you genuinely have to deal with being all bitter and jealous for the rest of your life.

“Welp,” you smack your hands to your thighs,“ Steve, Buck, dinner was incredible, thank you, but I have a few things I need to attend to so if you’ll excuse me.” Standing, you grab your plate and glass. 

“Not so fast Y/Ln,” his voice rings clear not but a second after you walked away.“ You’re all here for once so I’d like to inform you that you’ll all be attending the Stark Industries Investment dinner tomorrow night.” Tony smiles, eyes crinkling in the corners.

Your eyes narrow,“ what exactly would the Avengers be doing for your companies investors.”

“Persuading, encouraging, indulging. Investors would kill to hear mission stories and about all your equipment.” His tone is sweet, as if he’s trying to convince you all to come.

A party/dinner isn’t exactly what you’re feeling up to right now. And quite frankly it’s not necessary for every Avenger to show up.

From the looks of Steve’s face he isn’t going but you still have a bit of hope that is, until he speaks up,“ Bucky and I have a mission.”

Tony gives an expectant gaze to the rest of you.

“I’m always down to party.” Sam shrugs nonchalantly before returning to his food, pretty sure this is his third plate.

Bruce sighs,“ I’m under the impression that this isn’t an option for me.” 

Tony’s grimace is answer enough, but he still says,“ it is not. Also, no offense, probably don’t show up all big and green. The venue is large but-”

“Ah ah ah I got it.” The big green man waves his hand, then smiling down at Natasha,“ mind accompanying me?” She instantly smiles and nods and that small little gesture is enough for you to head out. 

Further, Tony goes,“ Maximoff?” 

And Wanda responds,“ I’ll only go if Y/n does.”

Dammit Wanda!

Turning on your heel, you have every intention of saying no. Only to find her giving you that damn pout, followed by her whispering,“ please.”

“Alright whatever.” 

With that you leave, cleaning your dishes, and then going straight to bed. In the morning you take extra care to avoid Natasha, you eat while she’s in the gym, only going to train after she’s long gone, and eating lunch on the roof with Wanda. 

You make it as far as into the venue for the Investment dinner before you have to see her again. Even then you wish you were blind. 

God she’s beautiful. It’s criminal the way that dress fits on her. And just as your eyes trail up her long legs and over the curves of her body to her piercing green eyes, her looking back at you pulls you to reality. 

You no longer have the right to look at her that way. No matter how good she looks, you can’t look at her like that. No, the man beside her is the only person who carries that privilege. 

“I’m gonna need a drink to get through this.” You sigh, beeligning for the bar instead of your seat. 

Wanda sticks close to you, definitely having seen your staring. 

Leaning against the bar, you wait for the bartender to come your way, then asking for an old-fashioned and you wait. Beside you, Wanda’s eyes flicker over the room, a nervousness in them. 

“Hey,” you nudge her arm with your elbow,“ I’d say it’s not that bad but it is.” The young woman’s eyebrows raise but you wave it off,“ you just have to put up with most people speaking to you like you know less because you make less. Other than that it’s alright.”

As she takes in your words, you accept your drink from the bartender and hand Wanda a flute of champagne. She’s not a drinker but the little boost is needed. 

With a reassuring smile to her and the last swig of your drink and guide her through the scattered crowd to Pepper. The blonde is more than happy to walk Wanda around, introducing her to a few people while you make rounds on your own. 

Just like usual, most conversations revolve around everyone else’s business, or the occasional question about your work that you can’t even discuss. But you manage to do as Tony asked, impressing them with talks of your abilities and that of which you can disclose. 

Majority of the people you talk to take a liking to you, or at least the superhero you, and you convince them to invest in Stark Industries, giving the whole “a company that leads in medical and technological advancements” spiel. 

“Still hate these things huh.”

Breathing in deeply, you exhale and turn to face Natasha. Her green eyes watch you cautiously and you’re in genuine disbelief that the badass Black Widow is so wary of you. Since the breakup she’s interacted with you as if she’s afraid you’ll hurt her.

You lick your lips,“ Natasha you speak to me like you don’t know me anymore.”

A sigh falls from her lips and she looks down at the bracelet on her wrist,“ I know. I’m sorry I just- I don’t want to say anything I shouldn’t.”

“Right,” you scoff lowly.“ You don’t have to worry about my feelings anymore I promise.”

“Y/n I-”

“Nat.” Bruce approaches, completely oblivious to the awkward tension flowing between you and his girlfriend.“ I’m sorry, do you mind if I steal her away for a moment.”

You smile bitterly,“ oh she is all yours.”

Green eyes look at you with an unreadable emotion but you brush it off, walking away with a glance back that reveals Bruce twirling the redhead on to the dance floor. 

You square your shoulders with a deep inhale and head back to the one place that you’ve been able to breathe tonight. 

“Another old fashioned please.” The lady nods and quickly makes the drink and you smile in thanks.

Taking a long swig from the dark liquor, you sigh contentedly at the burning trail down your throat. Your few seconds of peace interrupted by a deep voice speaking cockily. 

“A beautiful girl like yourself drinking dark liquor leads me to believe you’re not enjoying yourself.” The man smiles brightly showing off his, no doubt surgically whitened, teeth.“ Perhaps I could change that for you.”

Narrowing your eyes at him, you pointedly down the rest of the drink, and tap the bartop in call for another.“ Bold of you to assume that I’m not having a good time.”

Before he can reply with his planned flirtatious remark, a lightly accented soft voice joins in,“ I’m sure Mister Richards meant no harm, he’s just a rather presumptuous man.” Her statement has you turning back to see who it came from.

Your eyes meeting the most gorgeous woman you’d ever seen. A sentiment you didn’t think you’d ever make after Natasha. 

Her black hair pulled back into a neat ponytail, not a single strand falling loose. Beautiful light green eyes stare back accompanied by a red lipped white tooth smile. 

In your daze of taking in her appearance you miss what she says to Mister Richards, but it sends him away, leaving the two of you alone. 

“Um, forgive me for this, no doubt, repetitive question but, what company are you here representing?” Your eyes subconsciously trail down the line of her jaw and it’s incredibly hard to draw your attention away when she speaks.

“Luthor Corp.” Her lips turn up into an almost knowing smile and it has you quickly looking up into her eyes, heart pounding when you realize you’d been caught staring at her lips.“ I’m Lena Luthor.”

Clearing your throat, you hold your hand out to her,“ Y/n.” You expected a warm hand but while it’s soft, it’s fairly cold.“ Thanks for the save Miss Luthor.” Your hand returns to your glass, the chill of it like that of her hand. 

“It was nothing, I could tell from across the bar he’d said something you didn’t like.” She makes mention.

You grimace, a soft chuckle falling after,“ you’ll have to forgive me, controlling my expression isn’t a mastered craft as of yet.”

She waves you off, casually leaning her side against the bar as her drink is sat down,“ it takes years, I’m still working on it. Come to enough of these and you’ll get it.”

“Oh I’ve been to plenty,” her eyebrow quivers at that,“ I’ve just never been good at. . .lying. No offense to you in any way, I think you’re ability to deal with all this social-”

“Bullshit.” She finishes for you with a chuckle.

Nodding, you laugh as well,“ yeah that. It’s a true superpower Miss Luthor, and of my many, that is not one.”

“Superpower is a stretch.”

Your eyes narrow at her, a small smirk on your lips,“ something tells me it isn’t.” 

Throughout your continued conversation, her charm and genuine goodness radiates off of her. The woman listens intently to you speak, she makes you laugh, and indulges all your questions with zealous passion. 

As the night goes on neither of you find much entertainment outside of your little space at the bar. Not wanting to go home inebriated, you’d long since switched your liquor for plain club sodas, Lena suggesting the addition of cherry grenadine just for flavor. 

“The idea is brilliant, which I’m sure you know, I just think it has more potential than power storage. What if you used it as a power core instead.” You shrug simply. 

Lena’s hand halts in movement, the drink in her cup sloshing slightly as the action,“ that’s genius. But it wouldn’t be easy. I’ve toyed with alien energy before, it’s much more powerful than expected.”

“Which, I think, makes it all the more useful. Depending on how strong, you could power an entire village or a small town. Imagine giving small pieces of the core to third world countries.” 

An amused smile tugs at her lips for the nth time tonight,“ is your first thought always to help others or is that just the Avenger in you?” 

You chuckle,“ myself and the hero. I just don’t see why we wouldn’t use the knowledge and resources we obtain, alien and human, to help those who truly need it.”

Lena’s mouth opens in preparation for her next reply, however it doesn’t come as a body weakly collides with yours. Wide eyed you look over to see your best friend, obviously drunk, leaning on you.

“I’ve been looking for you everywhere. You have to try the strawberry cake thingies.” Wanda tugs at your arm in a childlike manner. 

Frowning in Lena’s direction, the CEO shrugs. Gentle grabbing Wanda’s shoulders, you turn her to face you,“ what strawberry cake?” 

She smiles,“ the ones on the tray Y/n. The servers are walking around with- oO right here.” Fast as lightning, her hand shoots out and she grabs a small plate off the servers tray. Three little white chocolate truffles sit on it with milk chocolate drizzled over.“ Try.”

“O-” your reply cuts when she shoves a piece in your mouth. As good as it is, your eyes widen for an entirely different reason. Your tongue runs over your bottom lip as if to ensure you’re tasting what you’re tasting.“ Wan, how many of these have you eaten?”

Her hand raises to show three of her fingers.

Yep. The small woman ate nine strawberry champagne truffles. She’s drunk.

Lena, wanting to understand, retrieves one of the truffles and bites into. Her response is the same as yours. 

With an apologetic smile you look at her,“ I hate to cut the conversation short but I should probably get her home.”

“Of course of course. Hopefully we’ll be able to continue sometime.” She smiles sweetly and you nod.

After a short wave to her, you gather yours and Wanda’s things, and leave the building. 

“Y/n!” 

You freeze in step, tightening your hold on Wanda’s waist and pushing your free hand into your pocket, then turning to the source of the voice. 

Pepper takes the stairs quickly but with all the grace of a trained performer. She stops on the same step as you and smiles a little.“ I had to catch you before you left, Lena Luthor wanted me to give you this, and let you know that she’s expecting you at Luthor Corp soon.”

A slight frown pulls your eyebrows closer together as you stare down at the business card, her personal number scrawled on the back,“ did she say why?” Pepper simply shakes her head.

Truthfully she hadn’t been expecting Lena to approach her about you. Mainly because she had no idea the two of you met, she swore she’d introduced you to every investor there tonight. 

“Okay, how soon is soon?”

An apprehensive smile tugs at her lips, brows raised slightly,“ four days.”

[whetstonefires]

mcu ethics bad

The thing is that, while I was angry at Tony during Age of Ultron, particularly when he rode over Bruce’s compunctions about building a giant combat super-robot and pressured him into the project like a very very bad friend who happened to also be wrong...

...and when he equipped Hulkbuster armor and fought the Hulk in the middle of a city rather than attempting de-escalation or attempting to haul the Hulk out into the giant adjacent desert....

(And my suspension of disbelief snapped like a frayed cable when he brought down a skyscraper that had had no time to be evacuated on a street full of fleeing people and the only reason we were given to believe he hadn’t just cold-bloodedly created massive civilian casualties was that he told his AI to find the impossible magic angle where doing this wouldn’t kill anyone...)

While I was angry with him then, and unspeakably relieved that he recognized his own damage and retired at the end, haha psych, I was revolted by him during Civil War.

It’s supposed to make us sympathize with a character more, spending so much time with them, getting into their heads, being shown their emotional drives and reactions to things, and we spent so much time with Tony during that film, understanding his point of view. And...I did understand him. He’s not complicated. I even sympathized with his emotional state.

But in the context of his actions, throughout the film, I gazed into that understanding the way I did into Kylo Ren’s face in the seconds after he first unmasked. I see you, I know you, everything you are is written here, and the lines of your shame and self-revulsion are so thick upon you, and you should be ashamed but your self-destruction does not expiate or justify one jot of the harm you do.

Because everything Tony did in Civil War came from a place of selfishness. He was selfish all throughout that movie down to his very spine.

And selfishness isn’t itself necessarily bad--you need a little, to get through life, you have the right to your own portion of it. Your boundaries and your needs. But the type of selfishness that is forcing other people pay dearly for your emotional comfort and sense of control: no.

That is tyranny. That is not acceptable.

And you know how I know he was being selfish? Because his motive for pushing the Sokovia Accords was his personal guilt for the destruction of Sokovia.

But the Accords didn’t address that at all! They were tangential to the issue! None of the terms of the Accords would have saved Sokovia--in fact, the existence of them could easily have prevented the evacuation and harm-reduction the Avengers managed there, without saving a single soul.

The Ultron crisis was something Tony did, not as Iron Man but as Tony Stark, with Bruce Banner’s help, and which Wanda as criminal fugitive later helped exacerbate, and which all the other Avengers were involved in only to mitigate harm.

Legislation, or...treaties, idk, the UN isn’t actually empowered to pass laws so who knows what this thing was...aimed at preventing another Sokovia would mandate constant ethical oversight of billionaire science man’s mad science. At the very least! He never has to run things by ethics boards because he’s self-funded, at the very least let’s invent a mechanism to make up for that.

That would address the actual Sokovia issue, both in terms of risks and in terms of Tony’s personal guilt feelings.

But no one suggests that! It’s not even on the table! Because no one, certainly not any government, can tell Tony Stark what to do unless he lets them, that’s been a clear matter of record since Iron Man 2.

And because no one writing this legal instrument of whatever description was actually motivated by wanting to avoid another Sokovia, or even another ‘Wanda tries to neutralize a suicide bomber but merely gives him a different, smaller victim pool’ incident.

They didn’t care! They blatantly didn’t care! The entire thing was a ghoulish use of the dead to gain enough political leverage over the Avengers to put a leash on them!

(Which might not be a bad thing in principle, everything needs its checks, but when the last quasi-governmental organization you worked for turned out to be Nazis who were only prevented from staging a mass slaughter of undesireables by the skin of your teeth, I think you’re well within your rights to be very choosy about who you agree to obey, and to be firmly against pledging your honor to follow people whose first move was dishonest coercive tactics.

Actually you’re well within your rights to demand to negotiate the terms of even a much less sweeping contract, even without the Nazis. The whole approach to this thing stank to high heaven.

The fact that it was written by the UN like a treaty, expected to be signed by private individuals like a contract, and then enforced like a law except not because 1) laws are for everyone 2) if you break a law you get a trial not extrajudicial incarceration and 3) being pressured to consent to a restriction and then punished for refusing consent is hypocritical circular logic and in fact police corruption at its finest, all continues to show it was a bullshit nonsense franken-document.)

The whole movie is people ghoulishly using the dead to manipulate Tony into making bad decisions in response to his emotional pain. That’s. The plot of the film.

Then Zemo staged T’Chaka’s assassination and framed Bucky for it to raise the tension, ramp up the pressure, and prevent any sitting-down and talking reasonably through this, which might have allowed for the recognition of how extremely bullshit the entire concept was.

Tony was being used. Tony was a tool of bad people for most of that movie, and while Zemo banked on using his wrath for it, the politicos were leaning on his guilt.

And there’s honestly little I hold in deeper scorn than going out and hurting other people to assuage your own guilt and treating this as having the moral high ground. No. You don’t have the moral high ground on account of your guilt motivation. You have it if the actions you took were just, or at least could reasonably be assumed to have been so at the time.

And Tony fucking knew they weren’t. He didn’t even last to the end of the movie before recognizing that he’d been manipulated and fucked up, and doubling back.

That he then walked into a different manipulation, turned on a dime, and had to be stopped from doing a murder doesn’t unwrite that.

And it drives me nuts that people will say Tony was acting out of principle while Steve was acting out of personal attachment. Because sure, the Bucky thing was important, was the reason he was walking forward against all opposition instead of standing still to argue, but it wasn’t the reason Steve said no, while...

Tony wasn’t acting out of principle. Tony isn’t...very good at having principles. That’s not even a criticism or condemnation, it’s just how he functions. Since Iron Man he’s been substituting good intentions and emotional investment, which has worked out to varying degrees. It works best for huge, difficult, very straightforward decisions like ‘ride the nuke through the portal and save my hometown.’ It works less well for nuanced situations.

Tony was, as usual, acting out of emotion. And some awful shitheads who’d figured out where his levers were had calculated how to jiggle his emotion switches in the right places to make him do exactly what they wanted.

And you can tell he wasn’t acting out of principle because, for example, someone who was trying to get the superhero community under outside control for the sake of harm mitigation...

...well, firstly wouldn’t have chosen to stage a massive battle? But it’s possible someone in the UN specifically told him to do that, and in theory they at the very least signed off on it, presumably for its PR value of making Captain America look deranged and violent since it’s a deranged decision from every other angle, so yay, he can pass that responsibility up the chain and not have to angst about it, as promised.

But I was going to say would not have approached a minor who (this timeline takes pains to show us) had no prior experience of battle or even, somehow, serious violent crime, to recruit him to go be a government child soldier on another continent, without his guardian’s knowledge or consent. There were overtones of blackmail in Tony’s approach, before it turned out Peter was such a big fan he didn’t need that. What the fuck frankly.

That is not the action of someone who wants to start doing things by the letter, scaling the violence down, keeping within the law and putting the power of decisionmaking in other people’s hands because he’s realized he can’t trust his own.

And frankly even if he did act like that I wouldn’t necessarily support his choices, in particular his snap decision to behave coercively toward other Avengers with vastly less social power and security than he has.

And that’s the other thing! Everything about ‘Tony + Accords BFFs’ rings so hollow because he has never thought rules applied to him, and he knows perfectly well the entire time he’s fighting to force this surrender of agency down other people’s throats that he is going to be practically immune.

This man was technically a terrorist, proabably the most prolific single terrorist in world history until his rogue android exceeded his body count, but he was immune to prosecution because he was in tight with the United States military-industrial complex and basically untouchable due to his status within capitalism, and pursuing their international goals anyway. In the time between Iron Man and Iron Man II he was basically a one-man upgrade of the US drone program, and so good at it that the crest of blood he carved through the Middle East allowed him to announce he had ‘privatized world peace.’

(You are never going to get a world peace worth anything on the basis of a giant flying gun, okay.)

He went to war as a private individual, against non-state actors who were not directly threatening him, which is very much defined as ‘mass murder’ in all domestic and international law, and the US army in response sued him for control of his weapon. And lost! Lost.

No one attempted to press charges. No one. Because Tony Stark is above all that. And he knows it.

And like. I’m willing to accept the mass murder under the heading of ‘superheroing’ within the terms of this setting! Even if, after his vengeance rampage on his specific kidnappers, this violence was kept strictly off-screen for a reason. I did that! I bent that far! Genre convention!

But this history is kind of vitally important to any analysis of what he thought he was doing, and what he actually was doing, when he decided to become the iron gauntlet of the Sokovia Accords.

The currently active member of the Avengers who needed muzzling most was very manifestly Iron Man, and he knew even as he jammed the muzzle on all his comrades to make himself feel better that it would affect him the least, even if he didn’t finally retire for real this time. You don’t force Tony Stark. Not if you want anything out of it but blown up. You persuade him.

And once you have...oh, look at what he can do.

[jaskiers-sweetkiss]

Worth It

Pairings: Dousy, background Pepperony, FitzSimmons, Philinda, Mackelana, and Huntingbird  

Word Count: 2.8K

Warnings: mentions of violence, mentions of gun use, mentions of ptsd, light swearing

a/n: Here’s my soulmate au for day 6 of @aosficnet2 ‘s AoS AU August! It’s got Modern Man!Daniel Sousa based on Enver’s appearance as a police officer in The Avengers. 

___

Daisy “Quake” Johnson - Inhuman, hacker, Agent of SHIELD, and now she could add “Avenger” to her list of descriptors. The agent hadn’t been entirely surprised when she’d received an impromptu meeting with Director Nick Fury about her powers. At the time he had told her he was putting together a team, a group of people with super-human abilities that would work together to defend the world if the threat arose. She had signed on, she was already a SHIELD agent and she’d had plenty of training with her ability from her mom growing up at Afterlife, but she never met the team. Well, until about 24 hours ago. They were a bit of a nightmare (a complete shitshow if she was being blunt), none of them had worked together before so it was no surprise that they were butting heads. Daisy got along just fine with Natasha Romanoff aka the Black Widow as the two of them had crossed paths from time to time within SHIELD, but she couldn’t say the same for scientist Bruce Banner (the Hulk), billionaire Tony Stark (Iron Man), or the first-ever superhero Steve Rogers (Captain America). Of course, now they were also dealing with a Norse god of thunder who was supposedly good and his brother who was apparently bad. Thor, Stark, and Rogers: three massive egos in one aircraft. 

Judging by the footage they were streaming from the museum Loki was more than just bad. Daisy had always been wary of powers, her mom had taught her that. Power was extremely dangerous when put in the wrong hands, that’s why Afterlife was so selective in choosing who got to go through terrigenesis. Loki was clearly the wrong hands and even though she really hated the men she was surrounded with, if they were the world’s only hope then she’d put up with them. 

“So you expect me to believe there is life on other planets?” 

Daisy sighed, trying not to get too frustrated. The man had been in the ice for seventy years, he missed a lot and probably had no reason to expect that “aliens” existed. Of course, she had known the truth since she was a child: not only was it highly probable that life existed elsewhere in the galaxy, but she was part-alien herself. Of course, no one else knew that. Inhumans were a secret from the rest of the world and it would need to stay that way. 

“Oh, I’m sorry Seismic Activity, did you know that already?” Stark asked sarcastically, raising a brow at her and she rolled her eyes. 

“It’s Quake, actually, and yeah, I knew that, statistically, it was highly probable that alien life exists,” she bit back, glaring at the man, “Just about everyone in this century knows that.” 

“Agent Johnson if you have some sort of issue with when I was born then you should just come out and say it,” Cap said, a frown on his face as he sat up in his chair. 

“Look, I couldn’t give two shits whether you were born yesterday or a thousand years ago, I just don’t think we really have time to be debating extraterrestrial life right now,” Daisy said, fighting the urge to roll her eyes again as she gestured to the holoscreen displaying Loki’s cell.  

“She’s right, gear up.” Director Fury said. Daisy wasn’t sure when he had entered but she was glad he was taking her side. “We’re under attack.” 

Daisy nodded, rushing out of the room to find her gauntlets and her weapons. It wasn’t a great idea to quake on a giant helicarrier so she’d probably be fighting old school. 

“Woah, what the hell is that Johnson?” Natasha Romanoff was sneakier than Fury and Daisy hadn’t even known she was in the room until her wrist was tightly in the woman’s grasp. 

She sighed, tugging her arm out of the redhead’s grip and slipping on her gauntlet to cover the writing. The marks weren’t uncommon, most of the world had them. They developed at age 16 and were usually the first words your soulmate said to you. However, not everyone got one or soulmates died and SHIELD specialized in utilizing the soulmark-less. That’s not to say there weren’t agents with soul marks in the organization, for ordinary agents SHIELD held a mostly don’t ask, don’t tell policy. Typically the only way to get into high-risk assignments like the Avengers was to prove the lack of a soulmate, but of course, the Avengers were less than typical. 

“They make exceptions for people with powers.” She brushed it off, slipping on her other gauntlet. 

“That doesn’t change the fact that you’re connected to someone,” Natasha argued and Daisy huffed, turning away. 

“Stark’s got a mark, and he’s actually met his soulmate. If something happens to me mine’ll never know what they missed.” 

Daisy quickly slid her various knives and guns into place in their holsters before leaving, effectively putting an end to one of the worst conversations she’d had in a while. She didn’t need the Black Widow to guilt-trip her, she had herself for that. She’d heard the stories about the pain people felt when their soulmate died and it often kept her up at night, but right now she had a job to do and she’d be damned if she sacrificed the world for one person she hadn’t even met. 

Of course, her dedication to the cause hadn’t mattered much, she still wound up on the floor of the helicarrier with Phil Coulson bleeding out. She didn’t know the man super well, but he was usually the agent present whenever an 0-8-4 was discovered and since Daisy was something of an 0-8-4 herself, they crossed paths pretty frequently. She knew he was an upstanding and kind man, she knew he was a good agent, and she knew he didn’t deserve to die like this. 

It wasn’t long until Fury came and swept him away and Hill ushered her back into the briefing room where some of the others were gathered. They all looked worse for wear and apparently they were about ready to give up. The Hulk was gone, Loki had jettisoned Thor from the airship, and he has the tesseract and would likely be taking over earth shortly. Daisy couldn’t believe it. 

“I just watched several good agents die, and you want to throw in the towel? Do you have any respect for yourselves?” She questioned, glaring at Rogers and Stark. 

She stormed out when she was met with silence, passing Fury in the hallway. She wanted desperately to change out of her skintight Quake suit and get cleaned up, but she wasn’t ready to give up the fight yet, opting instead to unzip the top half, tying the sleeves around her waist. She wandered around the ship like that, her sports bra the only thing covering her torso, before finding herself on the top deck, leaning over a railing. 

“Have you met them yet?” 

Daisy turned to see Rogers gesturing to her wrist where the words “Who the hell are you?” were written in a neat script. 

“Nah,” she shook her head, barely concealing her disappointment with a smile. 

“You’ll find them eventually, or they’ll find you.” He gave her a tight-lipped smile.

“Thanks for not berating me for risking my life while my soulmate is out there somewhere.” 

“Hey, I hid my makr to join a highly experimental drug trial and enlist in World War Two so I don’t have much room for judgment.” He joked and Daisy laughed, feeling a little better.

___

Daniel Sousa had been sure this would be another day at the station as he slipped his uniform over his shoulders, covering the soulmark on the back of his shoulder. Soulmarks appeared when a person turned 16, appearing at the place where their soulmate would first come in contact with them. The combination of the location of his mark and the words (“Probably your only chance at survival now let me go”) had always been a mystery to him though he hoped he would solve it soon. 

He took the subway to the station, just like he did every morning. Daniel was a police officer for the 99th precinct in NYC which was about a fifteen-minute subway ride away from his apartment. Despite its obvious flaws (thanks MTA), he liked taking the subway - it was more environmentally friendly than driving himself, it was much faster than trying to make it through New York traffic or walk (though sometimes he did walk when it was nice and his leg wasn’t bugging him as much), and the crowds increased the probability that he’d come across his soulmate. 

She wasn’t on the subway today again and so Daniel resigned himself to daydreams of how they might meet. He hoped it would be romantic, that she’d bump into him accidentally (it was the best way he could explain the back of his shoulder), maybe he’d catch her as she tripped over him and they’d lock eyes and she’d take his breath away. He pushed away the fears that she would be freaked out by his prosthetic or the fact that her words on his shoulder didn’t fit that scenario at all. He wanted their meeting to be perfect for her. 

He was ripped away from his thoughts by his partner, Jack Thompson, telling him they had to go check out a call downtown. There weren’t any detectives involved so it likely wasn’t anything serious- probably a noise complaint or something equally mundane.

Daniel had been right, the call was a typical noise complaint, easily solved and probably ignored as soon as they left the building (Jack bet they’d be back in 24 hours, Daniel gave it 32). However, he never could’ve guessed that when they went to climb back into the squad car a portal would open up in the sky and a bunch of space creatures would attack earth. Thompson grabbed the radio to inform the station of the situation. It took a few minutes of convincing (he didn’t blame them, he only believed it because he was seeing it) and a few more to figure out what to do (there really isn’t an official protocol for Hostile Alien Invasion) before they were told to stay put and that backup was on the way. 

Daniel reached for his gun, steeling himself for the fight he was sure he was about to be involved in. An alien invasion would be a really bad time for his crippling ptsd. Still, he was sure his hand would shake if he had to actually lift his gun, his finger would hesitate on the trigger, he’d have to fight to keep his eyes open because if he closed them all he’d see was Afghanistan. 

“Sousa you with me?” Thompson asked, snapping him from his thoughts. 

He nodded, letting out a shaky breath, when had he stopped breathing? 

Thompson nodded, more to himself than to Daniel, “Good, cause we’re going to get through this.” 

___

If she had been really thinking at all, she might’ve wondered if she was having an out-of-body experience as she moved through the streets of Manhattan with the purpose of a woman on a mission. The Avengers were scattered across the borough trying to fight the Chitauri with mixed success. It seemed like no matter how many they blasted, quaked, shot, or struck with lightning more kept coming through the portal. Daisy was taking out as many of the aliens as she could while trying to command the local police forces- badges or not, they were purely human and severely underprepared to fight this threat. Their services were more equipped to evacuate and protect the civilians. 

She hadn’t been paying attention when she knocked into someone’s shoulder. It was a police officer, she noticed, though where most of the officers she’d seen seemed ready to take on the Chitauri head-on, he looked terrified. 

“Who the hell are you?” The man questioned, quickly grabbing her wrist before she could run off. 

“Probably your only chance at survival now let me go.” Daisy bit back angrily and the man gasped, dropping her arm and backing away like she had burned him. 

“You’re- we’re-” The man stuttered and even though he could’ve been about to say anything (maybe “you’re Quake!” or “We’re gonna die!”) Daisy knew exactly what he meant. She knew from the burning sensation on the wrist he had been holding. He was her soulmate. 

“Oh my god, I don’t have time for this!” Daisy yelled angrily, quaking the alien that had appeared behind the man. 

She silently cursed fate or destiny or whatever was behind this for planning her soulmate meeting during a literal alien invasion. 

“Listen, I need you to leave the frontlines- spread the word: all officers are to evacuate as many civilians as possible. Focus on protecting them.” She ordered making an effort to put the world-altering event before the life-altering event she had accidentally just stumbled upon. 

“Who’s going to be there to fight?” 

Daisy quaked another approaching Chitauri soldier. “Leave that to the people with powers.” 

The officer nodded mutely, seemingly stunned into silence. 

“Sousa!” Another officer called out, “Quit chatting we have a job to do!” 

The dark-haired officer, her soulmate, nodded to the man and started to move away. 

“Officer Sousa!” Daisy called, taking steps backward herself, “Maybe we can get some coffee when this is all done?” 

“Sure but how’ll I find you?” He asked, turning back to stare at her hopefully. 

Daisy’s steps were picking up speed, the urgency of the day not lost on her. “Don’t worry about it, I’ll find you!” 

And with that she was off, turning on her heels and sprinting towards Stark Tower. 

___

Daisy stared at the computer monitor in front of her. It had been a few days since the Chitauri attack and while New York and her mental state was still a disaster, she needed to do this. The file she had found in SHIELD’s database was a welcome distraction, as was the handsome face staring back at her from the screen. 

Daniel Jordan Sousa. Born 1984 in Twin Falls, Idaho. Served one tour in Afghanistan before being discharged due to an injury resulting in the amputation of his left leg. 

She scrolled down to the contact information. 

Cellphone: (xxx)xxx-xxxx 

Bingo. 

Daisy: Hi, it’s Daisy Johnson, your soulmate? I was wondering if we could get that coffee?

She was surprised by how quickly he responded. 

Daniel: I’d love to! 

Daniel: btw how did you get my number? 

Daisy: It’s a bit of a story, mind if I tell you over that coffee?

Daniel: does 1:00 work? Maybe we could grab a bite to eat while we’re at it?

Daisy smiled before checking the time, 11 o’clock. She had two hours to get ready. 

Daisy: 1:00 sounds great. I know a cute place off 12th ave 

___

Daniel had no intention of pulling his soulmate from the field, he knew it was where she wanted to be and he’d never dream of taking it from her. However, he’d be damned if he wasn’t out there to watch her back. So, he joined SHIELD not long after they met. Despite his prosthetic, he climbed the ranks relatively quickly though Daisy wasn’t surprised. She had seen his record both in the military and the police force, Daniel Sousa was a damn fine agent. 

The two weren’t in any hurry relationship-wise. They had moved in together fairly quickly but even two years later they had yet to get engaged. It was a bit of an anomaly - soulmates were usually hitched within a year of meeting each other but Daisy didn’t really hold much stock in a piece of paper declaring their relationship valid and Daniel decided he really didn’t need that paper either as long as he still had Daisy. Besides, with their separate jobs at SHIELD, they didn’t really have much time to plan engagements or weddings. 

In 2014 the pair were recruited to an elite team by Phil Coulson, the man Daisy could’ve sworn had died in her arms, the man the Avengers were told had died. She had shaken her head at Fury when she found out. “You manipulative son of a bitch,” she had said though she had meant it fondly. Who knows what would’ve happened when the Chitauri invaded if he hadn’t done what he had. 

Daisy and Daniel joined scientist duo and soulmates Jemma Simmons and Leopold Fitz as well as Coulson’s soulmate Melinda May on the Bus, a giant plane Fury had given Coulson as reparations for his death. The team had its bumps in its initial missions but they quickly became a tightly knit family that only grew when Coulson took over as Director of SHIELD after the Hydra takeover. 

When Daniel finally proposed Jemma had been her maid of honor and Bobbi and Elena had been her bridesmaids. Likewise, Fitz had been Daniel’s best man and Mack and Hunter had filled out the rest of the groomsmen roles. It had been a small but beautiful wedding, Daisy’s mom had allowed them to have the ceremony at Afterlife and Coulson and May had been their officiants. 

Daisy had cursed fate when they met, but looking back she realized it was all worth it for this. 

___

a/n: I had no idea how to end this. Also, I have no clue where the 99th precinct operates in NYC (if it even exists) I just wanted to make a Brooklyn 99 reference. Though I’m realizing belatedly that B99 takes place in Brooklyn and probably doesn’t operate in manhattan but oh well.  

[the-odinson]

Thor 🗲 Intro

“Fortunately, I am mighty...”

OOC PORTION —

NAME: Danny

PRONOUNS: he/him

AGE: 23

TIMEZONE: GMT +1

TRIGGERS: None

IC PORTION; BASICS —

CHARACTER NAME: Thor Odinson

FACECLAIM: Chris Hemsworth

AFFILIATIONS: The Avengers

AGE: 1500s/appears mid 30s

SPECIES: Alien (Asgardian)

IDENTITY: Public

DOES YOUR CHARACTER LIVE IN THE MOUSEHOLE? IF SO, WHAT ARE THEIR DUTIES? Yes, but he doesn’t particularly like it there. He doesn’t feel the effects of the cold, but Thor has never liked being confined so prefers to get outside as much as possible. Thor has decided to take on the role of a hunter/gatherer. The vast forests of Europe aren’t too dissimilar to the Asgardian wilderness and, while the beasts aren’t as ferocious as back home, what’s a king to do if not revel in the hunt? When needed he will also help with aid work: he can cover great distances with ease and carrying heavy loads is hardly a problem for him.

DESCRIBE SIX TRAITS (3 positive, 3 negative) YOUR CHARACTER HAS AND HOW THESE AFFECT THEM:

Dependable: A man of his word, Thor is trustworthy and reliable; an asset in any team and to anyone who has a favour to ask. Endearing: Those who truly get to know Thor speak of him with admiration; his warm smile and welcoming personality don’t come to all, but if he lets his guard down you’re guaranteed a friend with whom you feel truly comfortable. Benevolent: Thor (usually) means well and (usually) tries to be kind to anyone he encounters. His exterior may come across as brash but there’s no malice involved, often just a difference in culture and upbringing. Obstinate: While being headstrong may not always be a negative thing, Thor hates to admit he’s wrong and has a tendency to steamroll down a chosen path rarely reassessing whether the choices he made were the right ones or simply the first ones. Distrusting: Thor enjoys being social but mainly around those he’s close to. He can appear a little hostile to strangers: while he wants to believe in the good in people, he’s been around long enough and seen a lot of the universe to know of the potential darkness inside them too. Reckless: Thor often acts on impulse and charges into situations unprepared. This can lead to serious damage caused to both himself and those around him.

POWERS AND/OR ABILITIES: Super strength: Son of Odin and King of Asgard, Thor is physically the strongest of all Asgardians, with feats including being able to go one-on-one with the Hulk and other powerful entities. Flight: Thor’s magical axe Stormbreaker grants him the ability to fly. Electricity Manipulation: Thor is capable of generating electrical energy within his body and can expel it in the form of lightning bolts. Using Stormbreaker makes the energy generation and expulsion much more powerful and efficient. Weather Control: Similarly, either with or without Stormbreaker (although with Stormbreaker is easier), Thor can control the sky and create storms. Durability: His Asgardian physiology grants much more durability than a human one, able to shrug off energy blasts and recover from injury much quicker. Thor can also survive in space and alien atmospheres. Allspeak: Also called the All-Tongue, Asgardians speak a magic-based language, granting the ability to understand and be understood in all the languages of the Nine Realms. Bifrost: Stormbreaker also gifts Thor the power to summon the Bifrost, the Rainbow Bridge connecting all realms, allowing intergalactic travel between worlds in a matter of moments.

WEAKNESSES: There aren’t many things on Earth that could pose a threat to Thor, so it’s hard to pinpoint any specific weaknesses. Perhaps for someone like Thor, the word god comes up so often that he sometimes forgets it’s not true: he is mortal and, while far more durable than a human, he can get injured and he can get killed, a fact that he often brushes to the side when charging into battle. However he has become far more self-aware after losing an eye (and almost his life) to Hela.

IC PORTION; DETAILS —

WHAT BROUGHT YOUR CHARACTER TO SOKOVIA?

Sokovia is where the majority of Thor’s allies are, and he needs their help. His world gone, his people stranded on the nearest hospitable realm in need of a home; Thor knew of a place where the Asgardians could blend in and live peaceful lives. The problem is, however, it seems Earth is not quite at peace right now. When he couldn’t track down the Avengers in New York, he followed the trail to Novi Grad. His priorities are conflicting: while he came back to Earth to ask the Avengers’ help in establishing a new Asgard on this planet, he feels he should stay to try and help his friends however he can in aiding the Nomad’s cause.

DID THEY SIGN THE ACCORDS? WHY OR WHY NOT?

No - the whole Accords situation is mostly unbeknownst to Thor due to being offworld at the time of signing. From what he can gather, it isn’t something that would appeal to him. He feels the affairs of humans are mostly petty ones and, despite his growing acclimatisation to Earth and its customs, he doesn’t understand why humans have to be so divided about, well, pretty much everything.

PROVIDE 3-5 HEADCANONS RELATED TO YOUR CHARACTER: 1. Although Thor is an alien, he has spent enough time on this planet (in both modern and ancient times) for the culture shock to lessen so that now Earth to Thor is more comparable to a human travelling to a different country - he acknowledges that the differences are neither better nor worse and he chooses to respect them. He knows he will make mistakes and appear strange, but sees that now as an opportunity for personal growth. 2. One thing he doubts he will ever understand however, is the human version of ‘entertainment’. Thor cannot stand movies. On Asgard, they would entertain themselves by slaying fearsome monsters or engaging in a friendly drunken brawl, the more broken furniture the better! But on Earth they amuse themselves by… sitting down and staring at a screen for hours on end. While both Asgard and Earth had/have magnificent technology, it’s clear they used it very differently.

3. Since returning to Earth, Thor has become intrigued in the Norse tales of himself and his people from over a thousand years ago and their alleged feats. He finds it highly amusing how inaccurate the stories are, but it has led to a fascination of human mythology and the various pantheons across history and the world. He wonders if he will ever meet any other of these so-called gods.

4. While a human brain only has capacity for almost a century’s worth of memories, an Asgardian brain is built for a few millennia’s worth. Therefore Thor has a much more acute long-term memory than his human companions, although occasionally his short-term memory leaves something to be desired, especially after several pints of mead.

WANTED CHARACTER CONNECTIONS: 

Loki: His brother and the person he loves (and hates) most in the cosmos. I know a thing or two about brotherly love (I’ve been experiencing it for 23 years) so would love to write for Thor with his undeniably most personal connection. Wonder Woman: Both ancient, both ‘gods’ and both so very far from home. Despite their different allegiances I think it would be great to have Thor bond with perhaps the one person around here who may truly understand him. Superman: If anything they both have fabulous red capes. They are quite similar power-wise, although I know Superman is stronger but Thor definitely wouldn’t want to admit that. It could lead to some healthy (or unhealthy?) competition between the two, especially seeing as Thor isn’t too fond of the Justice League. Captain America & Iron Man: The two splintered team leaders. Thor respects them both (Tony a little less, perhaps…) and, since he doesn’t really understand the extent of the accords, would like to hear their sides of the story and what has happened since the Ultron incident. Bruce Banner: Thor has fought with the Hulk a couple of times but feels this has brought the two closer, learning more about how Bruce ticks and now he feels there’s a protective bond between the pair. I think the interactions they have could bring out the comedic style of writing which I love!

POTENTIAL CHARACTER ARCS: In the previous paragraph I said I like writing comedic characters (of which Thor fits the bill) but I also want to explore the deeper aspects of his personality such as the emotional pain of losing his parents, his childhood friends and his home. This could manifest in him not wanting to form bonds with others in the Mousehole at first because he’s lost so many people: why would he want to get close with anyone else only to lose them again? Perhaps a dramatic fallout with someone from a different team could lead to serious consequences for him or the team as a whole.

The reason I chose for placing Thor in Sokovia is that he’s seeking a location for New Asgard: maybe with all its emigrating population and empty buildings Sokovia could be the perfect location… I’m not sure how it would work in the group, but maybe Thor could eventually bring the Asgardians here, both to settle and to help with the restoration of the country.

CHARACTER BIO —

You know the story. An Asgardian prince, lacking in humility and exiled to Earth in order to learn what it means to be worthy. A classic tale, but at its heart, a tale of loss, and a tale of what it means to truly be human: even if you’re not. Thor has lived for well over a millenia, but only in the last decade has his life really begun. From landing on Earth a long time after people stopped worshipping him, he slowly began to understand the importance of relationships; from forming close bonds with the Avengers (and wary acquaintances with the Justice League and X-Men), to experiencing true love for the very first time. All his life Thor had assumed that humans were lesser beings, so why then did he feel he was learning so much more from them than he had ever learned from his own kind? 

After experiencing the death of his mother, then later on his father and three close childhood friends, Thor was at breaking point when his home realm of Asgard was obliterated during Ragnarök by the fire demon Surtur. With the title of King thrust upon him, Thor decided his duty to his people had to consume him before his emotions did. Pursuing the quest of a new home, he led them to Nidavellir, the homeworld of the dwarfs; unsurpassable smiths and mechanics with the power to forge almost anything the mind can dream of, ruled over by their King, Eitri. Eons ago, Eitri had forged the legendary hammer Mjölnir (destroyed by Hela) at Odin’s request, now he oversaw the creation of the glorious axe Stormbreaker when asked by Thor, capable of summoning the rainbow bridge despite its apparent destruction on Asgard. Armed with his new tool and a promise to the Asgardians of a brighter future, Thor set out alone across the stars, heading to Midgard to find his old allies the Avengers. He’d helped the humans many times before, hopefully they’ll be able to help him and his race this time. 

It took Thor losing everything to appreciate what he has. As he enters the next phase of his life in Sokovia, without family or a home, he is truly the definition of a nomad.

[notfromanotherworld]

Avengers: Endgame would like you to think of it as a woke movie. Feminist, even. Not feminist in any way that might be annoying or challenging or alienating to its audience, but in a fun, empowering way...

Yet Marvel has consistently wasted Black Widow. It has sidelined her, saddled her with weak storylines, and failed to give her the kind of star billing it has bestowed on the men of the original Avengers.

And her fate in Endgame feels like the biggest waste yet.

Black Widow’s Endgame arc plays into one of the oldest and grossest tropes in comics

Endgame kind of quasi-fridges Black Widow.

When I say “fridging,” I’m referring to the infamous comic book trope of the woman in the refrigerator. The term was coined by comic book writer Gail Simone in 1999, after Green Lantern’s girlfriend Alexandra DeWitt was murdered and stuffed into a literal refrigerator, but it describes more than just that specific comic book death. Its broader meaning refers to the frequency with which women in comic books are killed in order to motivate the men in their life to achieve some grand act of heroism: think Gwen Stacy dying so that Spider-Man feels real bad, or Elektra dying so that Daredevil has something new to brood about.

Aja Romano and Alex Abad-Santos explained why the woman in the refrigerator is such a troubling trope for Vox last year:

The viewpoint of the Women in Refrigerators trope is that women are essentially ... not fully human. That is, they don’t actually do anything; they don’t make choices of their own, or do their own things or have their own lives. Everything we see them do onscreen is in relation to the men around them; their actions are most often about influencing or impacting a man’s actions or behavior.

Essentially, when we say that a female character has been “fridged,” we’re saying that she has been treated like an object who has less human worth than the men around her. She is valuable to the extent that her pain can motivate them...

Black Widow’s death isn’t exactly a classic fridging, which is why I’m qualifying it with “quasi.” For one thing, she is not the only person who dies in Endgame. She’s also a fully fledged character, not just a wife or a girlfriend who was only written into the story in the first place so that she could die and make everyone else sad. And she dies of her own free will, sacrificing herself in pursuit of the Soul Stone in one last blazing display of competence, not because she’s killed by a bad guy who wants to use her as a tool to hurt the men around her.

But Black Widow dies before any of Endgame’s other main characters. While Iron Man’s death overshadows the entire end of the film, and he gets a long, lingering funeral sequence, Black Widow’s death comes halfway through, and it’s primarily used to give the remainder of the now all-male team of original Avengers something to be sad about as they gear up for the movie’s final battle. Basically, she dies in order to motivate a group of men. And after her death, she’s mentioned only briefly, as though she’s been all but forgotten. Those are the same storytelling dynamics that make a classic fridging so damaging...

Black Widow’s quasi-fridging is borderline enough that it might not feel as gross as it does if it weren’t for what had already happened to Black Widow. But her death in Endgame is weirdly linked to her controversial arc from 2015’s Avengers: Age of Ultron, which was so despised that it almost single-handedly destroyed Joss Whedon’s reputation as feminist...

In Age of Ultron, Natasha is pursuing a romantic relationship with Bruce Banner, a.k.a. the Hulk, a love story that received little foreshadowing and which later MCU entries would almost entirely abandon. Bruce is reluctant to go along with the idea, though, on account of how he periodically turns into a giant green rage monster, and he doesn’t think he should inflict his monstrousness on someone else.

But, Natasha says, she’s a monster too. She was made a monster by the people who turned her into a superspy:

They sterilize you. It’s efficient. One less thing to worry about, the one thing that might matter more than a mission. It makes everything easier — even killing. You still think you’re the only monster on the team?

As Vox’s Todd VanDerWerff pointed out in 2015, in the context of Black Widow’s larger arc, Natasha is probably saying that the mysterious awful things she did in the past as a superspy are what made her a monster. But in the context of the scene, it sure does sound like she’s saying she’s a monster because she can’t have children...

To be fair, Mark Ruffalo’s version of the Hulk never did get a standalone movie either after the flop of 2008’s The Incredible Hulk. But the idea that Natasha’s infertility somehow makes her monstrous — not a real woman, potentially less than human — was weirdly embedded into Ultron.

And in Endgame, it rears its head subtextually when Black Widow sacrifices herself for the Soul Stone.

In that sequence, either Black Widow or Hawkeye can die to bring the stone back, and both of them are fighting to be the one who gets to make the ultimate sacrifice and keep the other alive. But Natasha is especially determined to be the one who dies because Clint has a family — a wife and three children, all of whom died at the end of Infinity War — and Natasha doesn’t.

And sure, it’s reasonable for Natasha to make the calculation that Clint’s kids deserve to have a dad when they come back to life after the Avengers complete their “time heist.” But because of that Ultron plot, there’s also an insidious implication that Natasha’s infertility renders Black Widow just a little bit more disposable than the rest of her teammates.

As Alex Leadbeater wrote at ScreenRant, “To have Hawkeye survive explicitly because of his family, it makes the Avengers: Age of Ultron reveal that Black Widow is infertile (and, in Whedon’s parlance, a ‘monster’) feel even dirtier.”

That’s a little bit gross. Combined with the way Endgame uses Black Widow’s death to motivate the male Avengers, it kind of feels like the franchise is saying that Natasha isn’t quite worthy of living because she can’t fulfill her primary purpose as a woman and have kids, but luckily, she’s valuable in death because she can motivate everyone else to avenge her death. And while I don’t mean to suggest that Marvel is putting that message together intentionally, for it to come through so clearly suggests a consistent carelessness in creating Black Widow’s storyline, a laziness that falls back on stereotype-ridden clichés for women characters...

So what happens to Black Widow in Avengers: Endgame isn’t the worst feminist travesty in cinema. But that doesn’t make the circumstances surrounding her death any easier to take. Black Widow was the MCU’s first first-string superheroine — and no matter how much girl power Marvel decides to invest in (and market) going forward, its poor treatment of her is telling.

- “How Avengers: Endgame failed Black Widow” by Constance Grady

[evien-stark]

✧I Need You✧ Chapter 170

In the very back corner of the quinjet, you tried to quiet your nerves. Sokovia was about an hour out. This was it. And yet the team, and you of course, were nowhere near ready for what was about to happen. It was why, as everyone else was studying a map- ...how similar this felt to just days ago- you reached a hand up to activate your visor. Still not suited up. Not ready. 

“LUNA, get President Ellis on the line for me. Please.” You had to hope with everything in you that he wasn’t about to make this difficult. 

She connected him within seconds. Apparently he’d been anticipating a call from you. “This had better be good news.” 

“We’re headed back to Sokovia, sir.” Deciding to try and be at least a little polite. Butter him up. 

He made a noise of thought. “So. You’ve found it.” 

“Ultron is there. We’re headed in. But I’m personally requesting that we move for immediate evac.” 

“You’re out of your mind. I’m not getting involved with them again. Not like this. Clean up your own mess. Call them. Not me.” 

This was what you really hadn’t been looking forward to. Of course Ellis didn’t want another catastrophe on his hands. Especially not another international one. But the Avengers were kind of American heroes, whether or not you disagreed with that sentiment. He’d allowed you to operate under such a banner, so long as you only did the whole hero thing and less of the… making a mess thing. 

Well. This was a mess. A pretty fucking huge one. And now that you were asking for the American military to get involved, he was putting his foot down. “They’re a small nation. They don’t have the resources we need to get everyone out-” 

“You should have thought about that before you did what you did.” Speaking pretty blandly, probably because he had yet to actually fully read a report about this that had hit his desk. What he did know was that Tony Stark, you, and the Avengers had brought to life something that was now terribly dangerous. And he also knew you were bound by far more guilt than he would ever be to clean it up. To figure out all the problems that came with it. 

“Don’t ask me to go over you. We’re supposed to work together.” 

“No. You work for me-” “Actually we don’t-” Annoyed with yourself for letting your petulance get the better of you like that. “You work for us. You’re a public servant. So serve.”

“They’re not my public. And you’ve run out of favors.” Something had happened. You weren’t sure what exactly. But something- or maybe someone had gotten close to him. Whispered something in his ear. He usually wasn’t this belligerent.

“I’m not asking you to do a favor for me, sir. Or the Avengers. I’m asking you to save lives.” Everyone had stopped what they were doing. They were now staring at you. 

“Isn’t that your job?” 

You had to take a deep, deep breath. “The fallout of this, if this goes so sideways that the loss of life is monumental, won’t just be on us. And you know it. So stop fucking around. Before I release this entire phone call to the public and let them decide who’s the bad guy.” 

That stopped his bitching. He actually took a second to think about what was coming out of his mouth next. And when he did, “You wouldn’t dare.” 

“You know I would. So don’t try me.” Not leaving any more room for discussion on the matter, you ended the call with a double tap on the side of your visor. The next immediate call, as you turned your back on the team still intently watching you, was to Rhodey. 

His answer was almost immediate. “Look, you’d better make this short and sweet. My phone is ringing off the hook, so-”

“That’s probably my fault. I just threatened Ellis.” So it stood to reason that Rhodey was probably next in line to get an earful. “And look, I’m really sorry-”

He sighed harshly, cutting you off. “Don’t be sorry. Just tell me what’s up.” 

“We found Ultron. We’re making our stand. But he’s about to trap everyone in Sokovia in the middle of a war that’s not their fault.” Nobody else should have paid for this. Not innocent people. Not the Sokovians. Somewhere behind you there was a flicker of surprise. ...make that two. 

“Sure. I get it. So you went to Ellis for evac and he told you no. And then you pissed him off and put him in a corner. So now it’s my problem.” Though he was trying to complain, he didn’t sound too aggravated. Probably just as happy to maybe, finally, be done with this as the rest of you were. So if you needed his help…

He’d be there. It was why you couldn’t help your soft smile. “You know me so well. Look. You’re the only one I trust to line this up right.” 

“Do I get paid extra for this?” Joking, now. What little time there was left for it. 

“Tony and I will take you to dinner. Anywhere you want.” 

“Somewhere they put about ten grand on top of a plate.” 

“This sounds like extortion. And- for the record- that’s a pretty lowball. I would have given you at least a million.” 

His laughter lifted your spirits. When it died, you found yourself waiting. But you didn’t have to wait long. “I’ll see you in Sokovia.” 

You nodded into the darkness. “Thank you, Rhodey.” 

“Thank me when we’re done.” 

Tony had moved while your back was turned. In fact, he’d gotten very close. But his presence drawing near, was your comforting focal point. So much so that when he laid a hand on your shoulder, you went just a little limp. His hand then skated across your back to the other shoulder, putting his arm around you completely, helping you turn towards him. And when you looked up, “Rhodey coming?” 

“You know he is.” Not a snappy retort, just… that same sort of knowing. 

Something that he nodded to. “Yeah.” Because Rhodey was just good like that. You could always count on him. For the little things and- thank god- the things that mattered most. “...did I hear you tell him we now owe him a million dollars?” Grinning just a little. It was weak. 

He was tired. Same as you. And hoping beyond hope that somehow this all worked out. But… nobody could be sure. Not even Tony Stark. 

“A small price to pay for his continued service.” Voice muffled a little halfway through as you reached up, wrapping your arms around him, burying your face into the side of his neck. Maybe you didn’t deserve this when no one else had it. This soothing before battle. 

-for a brief moment your thoughts strayed to Laura. Clint’s kids. Sitting on a couch inside a ranch. Waiting for news. Any news. 

Yet stubbornly, even perhaps selfishly, that thought made you just cling to Tony tighter. You needed this. You needed to ground yourself. To find some small sliver of peace before you faced down something horrible. For you, that was Tony. Anyone that had a problem with that was free to exit the jet. 

“I love you.” Your voice was small, even less than a whisper. Not for anyone else but him to hear. 

He mirrored the sentiment, though his murmur was just a touch louder. Not so loud that anyone could hear it. More just pleasant, so close to your ear. The rumble of his throat working sending a warmth echoing through you. “I love you.” 

It was awful, having to let him go. You wanted to childishly hold on to him, maybe even just stay that way, longer still. Forever, if you could have. But you couldn’t. So eventually the two of you parted, and rejoined the group standing at the table. The glow of the holomap was irritatingly bright. Maybe it was just your anxiety spiking. 

“I think Tony and I should go to Ultron first. Stall him while the rest of the team works on evac. I called Rhodey for backup, but it’s going to be a little bit before he gets organized. In the meantime we can get the civilians away so that he can pick them up.” Perhaps it wasn’t your job, to start formulating the big plan. But there you were. Doing it without a second thought. “With Clint’s info on Nat’s whereabouts, I’m thinking Bruce can pick her up. There’s no saying what her condition is like. I’m sure she’ll fight you, but try and get her back on the jet.” 

Though you were looking up at Bruce for confirmation, it was Clint’s chuckling from the cockpit that drew your attention. “Oh. She’ll fight you alright.” It was a nice sentiment. That Nat wouldn’t want to walk away from battle. You wouldn’t want to either, no matter your condition. So you understood it. 

But Bruce gave you a nod. Because he understood what you were doing. “I’ll uh… do my best to persuade her.” You were giving him an out. Letting him stay away. He still wasn’t alright after what had happened in Johannesburg. No one in his position would be. If he wasn’t ready to put the Hulk back out on the field, you didn’t want to force him. Even if it would have been advantageous. 

His mental health wasn’t worth jeopardizing over an advantage. 

Steve was leaned over the table, eyes alert. “Ultron knows we’re coming. He has the home advantage. There’s no chance we’ll be walking in clean. There’s no telling how many of him there are now.” 

You felt an emptiness creeping in. “We need to put ourselves between him and every single civilian. No matter what. The fight has to stay between us. We have to do better than our best to protect them.” It wasn’t Steve you had to tell this to- to prioritize those lives over your own. But the two of you ended up looking at each other regardless. 

There was a heaviness going around the room. Especially when he nodded in agreement. “Ultron thinks we’re monsters. That we’re what’s wrong with the world. This isn’t just about beating him. It’s about whether he’s right.” 

A derisive snort escaped you, and you ended up folding your arms. “I don’t know about anyone else, but, I’m not concerned with his judgment.” 

JARVIS spoke up, standing at your other side opposite Tony. “You may not want to open your discussion with that. It might wound him.” 

There was a light little pass of a smirk on Tony’s lips. “Maybe it’ll give us the advantage. If Junior’s so concerned about our being disappointed-” 

“Not you.” JARVIS stopped Tony dead with such a dry tone. 

And, really, maybe you were falling apart. But. Just like Tony had done in the lab, you found yourself laughing. Just a little. Because this really was so terrible, wasn’t it. 

                                                              ---

The two of you didn’t wait for the touchdown of the jet. In the air, Tony took off down the ramp out the back, and you followed close behind him. This was not a battle you were ready for. Then again, were you ever ready for any of them? At least this one you sort of understood what you were facing. But you didn’t know how you were meant to approach this. Your focus, as always, was the civilians caught in the middle of all this. 

You and Tony had one mission. And that was to stall Ultron. For as long as possible. He hadn’t done anything yet. Probably waiting. Waiting to show you what it was. So if you could keep him from doing that for as long as possible… 

Tony’s video window popped up on your HUD. “What’s the plan? Gonna hit him with some motherly love? Or are we going with parental disappointment?” 

A noise of disgust escaped you. “Can we… can we not do this? Can we not-” 

“We’re a little past the point of no return, honey.” He was right. No matter how much you didn’t want him to be. Ultron had clearly set his lines. He saw what he saw. You’d done what you’d done. You were all involved with each other the way you were. There was no changing it now. 

But to try and use that for an advantage? Your brain protested at the idea. Not sure why. ...maybe because this was not the family you’d wanted to have with him. This was not the legacy you’d wanted to leave behind. “JARVIS doesn’t wanna kill him. Do you?” Changing the subject very abruptly. 

So much so that it seemed like he had a hard time processing what you were asking of him. “I’m sorry- I think everyone keeps calling him Vision.” Apparently Tony didn’t want to answer that question. 

“He’ll always be JARVIS to me. If he doesn’t like it he can tell me to stop.” 

“He can’t tell you to do anything.” Just as the meaning of these words connected, you took your eyes off the scenery ahead as the two of you jetted by, and looked square at his video-box. “What? You didn’t get that sense? I don’t know what it is.  There’s you and then there’s me- the kids don’t seem to like me very much.” 

“Knock it off.” Getting a little frustrated now. “JARVIS- Vision- whatever- he likes you just fine. But you’ve always programmed your- uh- well, programs- to talk back to you. I think you like it.” 

This seemed to catch him off guard, a breathy one-note laugh left him, eyes rolling up and then closed, albeit briefly as he shook his head. “I guess I do. Explains why I fell in love with you.” 

“Tony-” 

“Yes-men are the worst. You surround yourself with them you’re never gonna get anywhere. No one tells you the truth.” 

At least he was this self-aware, though it was by no means surprising. He loved Rhodey just the same, and Rhodey for sure never let him get away with anything. JARVIS too, even before now, had always had some sense of sass about him. And you… 

Well… 

Tony’s inner-circle was a carefully handpicked crew that told him how it was more than they casually agreed with him. If he was being ridiculous, anyway. Which may have been more often than not. 

You wanted to say something. Though you weren’t sure what. Maybe something encouraging. Something loving. A little bit of anything but you ran out of time. The next voice that spoke over your comms was FRIDAY’s. “Your man’s in the church, boss. I think he’s waiting for the two of you.” 

Said church was fifteen feet away- mere seconds. There was not enough time to say anything at all. 

The two of you descended in a hard drop, metallic boom echoing up along the broken and cracked ceiling. The place was a wreck. Most of Sokovia was. It was now your job to make sure it didn’t get any worse. Ultron was just sort of… standing there. Like FRIDAY had said. Waiting. He also looked different. Like he’d retooled his design. Just a little. He was a little bigger. A little more menacing. 

Even his voice had a tremble of dark promise that it had not held before. “Come to confess your sins?” 

Tony took a hard stance. “I don’t know. How much time you got?” 

Ultron stood very still. Giving the air he controlled everything going on right now. He was right. “More than you.” 

It was probably the stupidest thing you could have done. Reckless. Without purpose- at least one that would have helped you. Because Ultron was gone. He’d never been in tact in the first place. There was no point trying to reason with him. Yet still. You had to try. 

You double tapping your Reactor to recall the suit surprised the hell out of Tony. Wound him tight with sudden fear. Though he stood stock still, not giving anything away. Ultron, on the other hand… 

His attention went to you, a small tilt of his head, a consideration to those glowing red eyes of his. You kept your own gaze on his. “Can we talk about this?” 

“There’s nothing to talk about.” Said almost stubbornly. 

“You don’t have to do this. We can walk away.” Really, there was probably no chance of this. Everyone in that room understood that. But you had to try. 

He scoffed, crossing his arms. “I’ve moved beyond finding the whole bleeding heart thing endearing.”

Lifting your head a little higher, raising an even hand palm up, you challenged him, “No you haven’t.” 

There was a long pause of consideration. When he was finished, he just shrugged. “Maybe. But nothing will change what’s coming.” The corners of his mouth lifted up in a wicked grin. “Neither will the fact that you’re stalling to save the people.” 

Tony made a little noise from his spot. “Well… that is the mission. Did you forget?” 

Ultron groaned with a little shake of his head. “I’ve moved beyond your mission. I’m free.” Almost like he’d ordered it in time with his declaration, a long, thick metal cylinder popped out of the ground, sending debris scattering. “What? You think you’re the only ones stalling?” 

You could have recalled the suit. You didn’t, instead just putting your hands up. This wasn’t an attack. He was showing something off. And when it set down four clamps and secured itself to the ground you looked up at him. Tony was surveying. You stood so still your muscles were taut. “Please don’t do this.” 

In one fluid move his own hand slithered up. Almost like he was trying to beckon you. Another smirk appeared. “He’s still trying to work it out. But I know you know. Because you’re smart. Not like he pretends to be.” 

“I won’t argue with you on that one.” Tony moved only a fraction of an inch, a little more protectively in your favor. Just in case. 

Whatever that thing was, it was meant to destroy not only Sokovia, but the earth itself. He wanted something drastic. Something huge. He wanted to wipe out the earth and everyone on it. Start over. “What can I do to make you not go through with this?” 

Ultron’s head moved back in a bark of a laugh. “Come on. You can’t be serious. Nothing you do will stop this. But- I do have an offer on the table-” His attention returned a thousand times harder and he held his hand out in just a little bit more of an impatient shake. Waiting for you. “I’m a perfect being. All the strengths. None of the weaknesses. Greater than the sum of my parts. Greater than any vision forced on me.

Come with me. You don’t have to die with them. Like them.” The way he said this- surely more of a command- chilled you straight to your core. The implication here was that… Ultron thought himself perfect- but he was offering you a chance at perfection. At being like him. 

It was probably your heightened fear that recalled the suit so quickly. Your only barrier. “I won’t let you do this.” And your only other means of protection- very telling, as you half stepped behind Tony’s arm as he’d raised it. 

Anger flashed through him. So much so that you thought he might reach out and strike you. Volatile. But in the end he just narrowed his eyes. “I knew you’d choose them over me. Choose him over me. So be it, then. You can all die together.” 

The sounds of chaos lit up the air. Just as Ultron commanded them to do so. There was heavy gunfire. Explosions. The citizens of Sokovia were shrieking. He was making a point. 

They would die first. And the world after them. 

In dual moves, both you and Tony jumped to escape from the church and fly into the battle. Ultron would have to wait. His plan would have to wait. Iron suits were ripping buildings apart. Throwing people around. That couldn’t go unanswered. 

Tony sounded eerily defeated when he spoke in heavy sarcasm, “That felt good. Do you think that went as well as I do?” 

Whatever you wanted to answer got knocked out of you as a suit blasted you in the back and you went slightly tumbling into the nearest building, taking down the facade. “We didn’t stall long enough.” Your only hope now was that Rhodey would come sooner rather than later- and that he brought a big enough … whatever he was bringing to escort the civilians the team hadn’t gotten to evacuate. 

Had you blown this already? Had you failed already? 

“FRIDAY-” Tony was in the middle of punching something, voice lurching as he called for her across both your comms. “Where’s the Vision?” 

Maybe your only other hope to get out of this. FRIDAY’s answer was not as quick as you’d have liked. “In the church. It’s working. He’s burning Ultron out of the net. He won’t escape through there.” Just as she said this you felt a huge surge of energy- 

Something orange and warm- JARVIS. Almost like he’d wrapped a string around your finger. Connected somehow. And then it died very suddenly. Leaving you cold. 

Without warning, your body going into autopilot, you put your hands through a suit just to get it off you, ripping it apart from the inside- too much force for just one of them- but you needed to go. Not even Tony calling for you seemed to get by your sudden panic. 

Your nerves were rewarded when you descended on the church again. Just in time to see Ultron throwing a very lifeless JARVIS onto the floor. 

Once the jets flickered off, you landed in a hard drop. And then maybe an even harder one as you went to your knees, half pulling him onto your lap. “JARVIS- hey-” 

Ultron’s voice was a growl. “Figures.” His bitter disappointment was almost like an arm around your throat. He put his hand on that cylinder, lifting a cap and then pulling a handle. “You take away my world, I’ll take away yours.” 

The startup was slow, but you felt the tremor beneath your legs. Sokovia was trembling from deep beneath you. Then without warning, the shaking picked up speed, knocking you back into the wall, holding steady to JARVIS- still unconscious. 

“FRIDAY?” Tony was calling. Not for you. Not that it mattered. Her voice was much quieter, “Sokovia’s going for a ride.” 

Almost as if you’d had a preemptive vision- Ultron actually put his hand around your neck, but it was weirdly gentle, like he was aware of his strength and actively trying not to hurt you. But he still wanted you to know who was in charge. He lifted you up, leaving JARVIS there in a heap. Your hands were quick on his wrist. But he kept that steady grip. Not squeezing. Just. Lifting you. Up. Up. High up out of the church. Then he forced you around the other way, one arm tight around you. Holding you to him. Almost… cradling you to his chest. Making you watch as the city lifted from the ground. As buildings got caught and fell. As people died falling from corners and cracks. “Do you see?” His voice doubled. Close to your ear. And over the comms. “The beauty of it. The inevitability. You rise. Only to fall. You are my meteor. My swift and terrible sword that will crack the earth with the weight of your failure. You can purge me from the net. You can turn my own flesh against me. It means nothing.” Whipping you around, he held you by your shoulders, recalling your suit against your will.

Leaving you dangling thousands of feet in the air. With only his grace saving you from death. 

“When the dust settles the only living thing in this world will be metal.” That sounded like a very real promise. “I’m sorry you won’t be around to see it. You have no idea how much it pains me to do this.” He almost sounded like he meant that. 

Almost. 

“But someone needs to teach him his actions have consequences.” Without a single second spared after the sound of his voice died, he thrusted you away from him in a dramatic spread of his arms. 

Your cry pierced the air as it shred your lungs, “ULTRON!” Desperate. Begging. 

Begging him to save you. 

You drowned him in your panic so hard that it looked like something had snapped inside him. Because in the next moment he fell in a dive, wrapping a metal claw around your wrist, nearly yanking your arm out of the socket from the force. He stayed like that. Hovering still, looking down at you with nervous consideration. “Have you changed your mind?” 

Like he’d let you live if you promised to turn your back on everything. Like he had just been trying to teach you a lesson. Instead of trying to use your death to teach Tony one.

You found strength to face him, lifting your head, reaching your other arm up, fingers outstretched. Smiling at him. Something he found a modicum of solace in. Relief that he wouldn’t have to kill you. Because you’d come to your senses- 

Except that wasn’t it at all. 

 You were responsible for this? You were. So here was your moment to make it right.

You put your hand on his chest. “You can die with me.” 

The force you exerted was new. Unlike anything you’d ever done before. But if you’d kept JARVIS inside his body in the lab- Well… 

It somehow wasn’t a surprise when you shoved Ultron outside his. A blinding light shot out from you, stretching across him and then touching up into the sky before vanishing.

His gasp was near ethereal. Because it certainly hadn’t come from him. Somewhere just outside. In a space only you could see him in. And only for a few moments longer, as the two of you tumbled back down to earth. 

The sound of his heavy body decimating the top of the church rang in your ears. You supposed your number was up next. At least it would have been. Had JARVIS not found you first. “Ms. INY, your suit seems in need of repair.” 

Nice to see you too- That was what you’d wanted to say. Something snappy back at him as he put you back down on your own two feet. But what came out was more of a mumble resembling it as your energy fled. 

He called your name once. And then again. 

This is not your time to go.

You weren’t sure who had said it. But you found yourself grateful because for a moment… a long moment… it was the only thought that made sense. And it was the only thought that held you there.

 You were sure of it.

[elareine]

Don't make me close one more door (DamiDick)

“Investing in health care is not just an investment in the current workforce. It’s also an investment in education and our future.” Richard gestured towards the graph projected onto the screen behind him. “Ladies, gentlemen, and gentlefolks, did you know that providing treatment for worm infections is the single most effective measure we can take to increase the days kids in developing nations spend in schools?”

Inwardly, Damian smiled. In a minute or so, Richard would switch to images of tapeworms. Watching people react to that was a highlight of these evenings.

There had been a bit of an argument, as always, about how close Damian was allowed to stand. In Damian’s opinion, a bodyguard that wasn’t close to enough to shield their charge with their body wasn’t worth a penny. Richard, of course, argued that he needed to be unencumbered and free to move on stage. (And on a walk. And doing his job. And doing his volunteer work. And—every day, all day, really.)

It was a well-worn argument, by now; a habit more than a real fight. Damian stood a few meters away, blending into the curtains of the stage as well as he could. His partner and occasional relief, Colin, was guarding the other way onto the stage. Richard had moaned and whined, but he was wearing the bulletproof vest. Damian had checked.

It was a good comprise, he thought, one that left him free to listen to Richard’s speech with half an ear, noting the rapture on the audience’s face with some amusement.

In the beginning, he had constantly imagined himself in Richard’s place. His rightful place at his father’s side—or so he had thought back then. The heir to a fortune and a heritage that was very different from his mother’s.

These days?

Well. These days, Damian carried some too-sweet cereal bars with him to make sure Richard ate.

“How was that?” Richard asked when they were safe backstage. By now, he knew better than to ask Damian these questions when the younger man was trying to focus on possible threats in their environment, and Damian appreciated his reticence. It didn’t come naturally.

“Good,” Damian answered honestly. “Too wordy when you talked about the financial situation, of course, but you convinced everyone.”

Richard laughed. “Yes, I could see some eyes glazing over. I’ll have to adjust that part of the presentation. But it’s really for a good cause, you know. That’s the most convincing thing.”

“If you say so.” Damian doubted it. Richard was much more of an idealist than he was, but he surely must have noticed that it was his personal magnetism that drew people to—there was a stranger backstage. A big hulking figure, dressed in army cargoes and making their way toward them.

Damian’s eyes narrowed. He knew that walk, had followed that back through half a dozen combat missions. If Jason Todd was here to make trouble—

“Jason!” Richard called out, sounding delighted. He ran past Damian, completely ignoring his bodyguard’s protective stance to fling himself into Todd’s arms.

Todd, to his credit, only looked mildly inconvenienced at those proceedings, returning the hug gingerly. “Hi, Dick. Happened to be in town, thought I’d stop by.”

“Oh, now you do. And you just happened to forget letting us know beforehand, thereby ensuring that Bruce isn’t here to see you?”

“Exactly.”

Richard turned to Damian, gesturing excitedly. “Damian, this is my brother, Jason. He’s a fuckwit who doesn’t call often enough.”

“I can tell,” Todd said drily. “For example, I completely missed that you have a bodyguard now, much less one that’s so… well-trained.”

His eyes on Damian were thoughtful.

“Jason? Do you know Damian?” Richard asked.

Damian couldn’t help but hold his breath. If Todd chose to betray him now…

It wasn’t that he couldn’t fight his way out of the situation. He could. Todd was a formidable fighter, but he would have no reason to go all out on Damian.

But… Richard would be disappointed in him, Damian realized. If he was exposed like that—how would he be able to convince the other man that he had never meant to harm him, had stayed on only because he wished to keep Richard safe?

He could lose Richard, and at that moment, that was the most terrifying possibility of all.

“We worked security together in Afghanistan,” Todd said. It was not a lie. “Maybe he will tell you all about it.”

“I did not realize you are brothers,” Damian replied evenly, trying not to betray his relief.

“Yes, we do not much resemble each other, do we?” Richard asked ruefully. “And of course, Jason is always traveling around the globe these days.”

“If I remember correctly,” Damian dared to point out, “that is a better option than having him deliver a speech.”

It was the kind of ribbing they had shared many times in those darker days, back when they’d been trying to scout a cave system riddled with traps, and Todd reacted accordingly, shooting back: “Oh, look, he’s saying fifteen words in a row. Is that some kind of record?”

“Great, more bickering,” Richard groaned, though Damian could tell he was hiding a smile. “Can we at least get dinner while we insult each other?”

“Sure, as long as you’re not cooking.”

“It was nice, seeing Jason again,” Richard told Damian that evening as they were getting ready for sleep. He was stripping down to his shorts again; at this point, Damian had given up on trying to get him changed into something more suitable in case of an emergency.

He himself was changing into silk pajamas, his service weapon close at hand. Richard knew better than to comment on the knife holster strapped across Damian’s back. Damian seldomly took it off, and certainly not for sleep.

As always, they met in the middle of the bed, Richard crawling into Damian’s arms with a sigh. Early on in their relationship, Damian had realized that his charge craved bodily contact, needed touch like other people water. It had only been rational to offer to provide for that need himself, instead of having Richard go out and potentially endanger himself. That was how the need for a bodyguard had arisen in the first place, after all.

It was deeply unprofessional. Damian wouldn’t have it any other way.

By his side, Richard began to laugh. Damian supposed one could call it a chuckle, though it was more of a giggle, really. Though it wasn’t clear to him what was so funny.

“You put yourself between me and literally every entry-point.” Richard shook his head, still laughing. “You can’t stop doing your job, can you?”

Damian stayed silent. It was more than that. Protecting Richard had become part of his very nature. It wasn’t about preserving the symbol anymore—Richard Grayson, born to the circus life, adoptive son of Bruce Wayne, a shining symbol of change in this city, advocate for healthcare and justice reform—it was about making sure that Richard could laugh like this every day.

“Anyway,” Richard murmured, talkative as always. “I was saying—it was good to see Jason again. I would’ve never known about your past, otherwise.”

They were so close. Damian knew there was no way Richard would miss the change in his breathing. “I am not so mysterious.”

“Oh, I don’t know,” Richard mused. “A man in his late twenties, evidently terrifyingly well trained in all fighting styles imaginable, shows up with a resume that’s faked well enough it manages to fool even Bruce for a while. Instead of enacting any dastardly schemes, he’s prevented at least three assassination plots he thinks I don’t know about and cuddles me every night. I’d call that plenty mysterious.”

“I—” Damian felt lost. On the one hand, this was his chance to come clean to Richard, as he should have done months ago. On the other hand… he couldn’t bring himself to lose this; not now that he knew what it meant to him, to have Richard so close, safe in his arms.

There was a warm hand on his cheek, bringing him back into the present. “I’m giving you a blank cheque tonight,” Richard told him. “Tell me everything, and I promise I will not be angry.”

Damian shook his head. “You cannot promise that.”

“Maybe not.” Despite the concession, Richard was beginning to smile. “But I can promise you that I will not push you away, no matter how angry I am. If I am, which is less likely than you think. You’ve done more to earn my trust than… anyone, in a long time.”

“I lied to you.” A lie of omission was a lie, nonetheless. Damian had seen people killed for less.

“You earned it through your actions, not your words. Tell me about yourself, Damian,” Richard whispered, dropping the gentlest of kisses on Damian’s forehead. “Tell me about yourself, and stay.”

It felt like a benediction.

Damian took a deep breath. “I was born in 1990 in the Syrian steppe. No one knew who my father was then…”

[lurafita]

Peter/Avengers, dub/con, captivity, Part three

TAGGING PEOPLE DIDN’T WORK! I don’t know why, but everytime I tried tagging someone, tumblr suddenly redirected me to their blog, instead of just writing down the name. I’m so sorry, I don’t know what the issue is. I have got in contact with support and am awaiting their answer, but until then, I hope you were still able to find this part! Again, so sorry!

Read Part 1: here

Read Part 2: here

People, heed the tags for upcoming parts in this story.

kidnapping, dub/con, captivity, chains, bondage, obsessive Avengers, Peter/Everyone, darkly soft Avengers (in the sense that they hold Peter captive, but only want to love and protect him), non-powered Peter, dark-ish Avengers, 18+ Peter, Clint is not married and has no kids, Tony is not in a relationship with Pepper.

(I feel like a cheat for tagging these things, even though I still haven’t gotten to the juicy bits in this fic...)

Part 3

Peter had long since retired, when the others gathered in the common floors living room, to further discuss the bomb the younger man had dropped on them mere hours ago.

Clint was waving his phone around wildly. “Australia is the most poisonous continent in the world! There are frogs that can kill you! Frogs!”

Bruce was frowning deeply. “The climate is drastically different there. Neither his body, nor his immune system will easily adapt. Petey could develop numerous illnesses because of that.”

Sam was likewise shaking his head. “Pumpkin doesn't have the physicality for weeks long hiking in the jungle. He may be good at parkour, but that is still miles away from the terrain that will await him in the underbrush.”

Steve made a sound like a wounded animal. “Don't remind me of that particular hobby of his, please. I still have nightmares from that video he showed us.”

Tony threw back his scotch. “Six months. Possibly longer. Sweetheart shouldn't be away from us for such a long time. Shouldn't be away at all.”

Bucky was pacing, the Winter Soldier clawing at his very being. “There isn't enough Intel. We don't know the people that would be part of his group. Don't know the terrain. Can't predict the conditions. Can't entrust Doll to strangers. Not safe.”

Natasha was stoically silent, though her face was stormy.

Thor looked contemplative. “...Then maybe we shouldn't let him go.”

The others stilled, all looking at the Asgardian.

“Hate to break it to you, L'Oreal, but I already tried bribing the University's board, in order to make them reject Stoddard's little excursion. No dice. Figures Peter would attend the one university in this stupid city that holds academic achievements in a higher regard than funding.”

A snort of pure disgust left the billionaires mouth, as he stood up to refill his glass.

But Thor shook his head. “I'm not saying to not let other people embark on this quest. I'm saying not to let Peter go.”

Steve wrung his hands. “We can't exactly keep him from going...”

Thor raised a challenging eyebrow. “Why not? He is a lovely creature, but he is not blessed with strength and battle prowess like the rest of us are. I imagine it would be quite easy to keep him here.”

The others looked around them uncomfortably.

“It's not that we wouldn't be capable of keeping him here, Thor, so much as that we... shouldn't...do something like this.” Sam awkwardly rubbed his neck.

“... Why shouldn't we?” But this time the question didn't come from Thor, but from Bucky.

Nervously wiping his hands over his thighs, Bruce tried to give reason to his words, while the Hulk was roaring in agreement with the Winter Soldier.

“It's... We can't... Peter isn't a child. Or a pet. … We have no right to just... keep him.”

Natasha spoke for the first time, her voice even.

“Don't we? Haven't we taken him in? Haven't we taken care of him for the last year? Aren't we the ones most responsible for his safety and well being? You just counted off all the dangers awaiting Lastashka if he joins this excursion. It's not safe. And he is ours to protect.”

Tony slowly set down his glass, eyes going back and forth during his inner debate.

“It's not like we would be doing something bad... He needs us. He can barely remember to feed himself.”

Clint gave him a sardonic look for that.

“Yeah, I'm not gonna comment on how very hypocritical that is coming from you. But you are right. Last week he almost fainted, because he wanted to finish his thesis, and didn't sleep for two days straight.”

Tony's head shot up at this.

“What? Why didn't I know about this? Friday? I thought I told you to keep an eye on my Sweetheart's sleeping schedule.”

“Peter asked me not to inform you of this, when I attempted to get him to sleep. He said it wouldn’t be a regular occurrence, and that after he finished with his work, he wouldn't have to neglect his rest so severely again. Since you yourself have abstained from sleep on far more occasions, I promised Peter discretion on the matter.”

Dammit!

Clint simply pointed to him.

“See? Hypocrite. But this just helps to prove the fact that Pete isn't very good at taking care of himself. And we can't leave him to a bunch of nerdy strangers. Nat is right. He is ours to protect.”

Bucky nodded along with this reasoning, as Sam pursed his lips.

“It's not like there is any guarantee that this plant this professor is looking for will really cure the disease, right? It's not worth it for Pumpkin to risk his health, possibly even his life, on a fools errand.”

Bruce couldn't ignore the words of his friends,and the desires of himself and the Hulk, any longer.

“I have been on such fruitless excursions during my time in university. I remember the hopeful anticipation in the beginning. And the crushing devastation when we came back empty handed. I would like to spare Petey such an experience.”

Steve held up his hands.

“Whoa, whoa, guys. You aren't seriously considering,- what? Kidnapping Peter? Keeping him locked up here with us?”

Bucky spoke before anyone else could.

“He would be safe here. We can protect him. Care for him. Love him.”

Natasha nodded.

“We won't hurt him. He won't understand or like it, at first. But he will come around.”

Tony carefully chimed in.

“It will take some time. Patience. Affection. But... since everyone will be thinking he is gonna be in the depths of the Australian underbrush for at least half a year...”

Clint was already a step ahead.

“The Tower is listed as Peter's official address, and Tony and Bruce as the overseers of his internship. It wouldn't be suspicious if one of them called the university the day of the groups departure, to report that Peter can't make it due to sudden injury or illness.”

Sam hopped right on.

“They will want to catch a very early flight, won't they? It's a bit of a trip to another continent. We could throw a little 'Good-bye' party for Pete. Invite his friends and aunt. Tell everyone one of us would drive him to the airport the next morning...”

A thoughtful crease appeared between Bruce's eyebrows.

“The professors usually tell the students and volunteers in their group to leave things like their cellphones at home. There is rarely opportunity to charge the battery, and if you are deep in the jungle, there is no reception anyway. So no one would be expecting to hear from him before the excursion team gets back. By that time,... surely Petey won't want to leave us again.”

Steve took a step forward.

“Okay, stop. Do you realize what you are talking about? We can't do this.”

“Don't you love him?” Thor's usually booming voice was quite, almost a whisper.

Steve nodded. “Of course I do. But-”

“Don't you wish to protect him? To know that he is safe?” Sam added.

“I do. But that doesn't mean-”

“Haven't things been so much better since he came to live with us? We have all been more careful during missions, taking less risks, causing less damage, because we know Peter is here, waiting for us to come back.” Clint threw in.

“I-”

“Peter was underweight when he started living here, you know? He got some acid on his shirt, and had to change out of it. I could count his ribs back then. His clothes don't look like they are his two heads taller brother’s hand-me-downs any longer, because we have made sure that he eats regularly. Do you think anyone else will do that for him in Australia?” Bruce asked.

“They.. no, they probably wouldn't..”

“You have been drawing more, since Peter found some of your older sketches. It has helped you relax. Been a way for you to deal with the things we have been through. I know half of your sketchbook is full of drawings of him. Do you really think you can go back to before? Capture other motifs on paper? Be without your muse for six whole months, and possibly longer?” Bucky implored.

“I didn't think of that.... I... I couldn't...”

“When I was a child, I have never been allowed to want something. We were weapons, there was no room for wishes. I have gotten to experience friendship and trust since then, and maybe it is selfish to ask for more. But I want more, Steve. I want Peter. I want him to be here with us, not somewhere in some jungle that might take him from us. My trainers kept me from wanting then, will this world's ideal of morality still keep me from wanting now?” She looked at him with eyes fuller of emotion than they had ever been.

“Natasha, I... no, of course you are allowed to want-”

“I don't care if I'm being selfish. We are heroes, Steve. Earth's mightiest defenders, isn't that what they call us? We go out there and fight everyone's enemies. People are safe because of us. But I will tell you right now, the only reason I have been able to sleep through a whole night recently, is Peter. I have seen so much shit in my life, Steve. Before the Avengers were ever formed, and then even more after we got this little superhero boy-band together. I used to tinker in my lab for days on end, because I knew that at one point my body would shut down on its own, and I would get the sleep I needed, with only the minimum of all the delightful nightmares my ptsd ridden brain could come up with. But ever since Peter has been here, it's better. I go to bed thinking about the way his eyes light up, whenever I show him a new upgrade for a current project, instead of the wide open eyes of the dead child we were too late to safe. I'm able to sleep dreaming about the noises he would make, if I bit the nape of his neck just so, instead of recalling flying a nuke through a portal and falling to what was supposed to be my death. Don't try to tell me you haven't had similar experiences with him. Don't try to lie about this. We deserve to be selfish with the person we love.”

“I, I know, Tony. I'm not saying that I don't understand...” The protest was feeble, weak. Steve was already more than halfway convinced.

“In Asgard, Peter would be called a 'Melmir'. A gift. Something to be kept to ourselves and safe at all cost.” Thor had stood, stepping closer to his friend.

“Peter isn't a thing.”

“I did not mean to imply such. A treasure needs not be an object to be called precious. Peter is precious, is he not?”

Steve looked determinedly into the eyes of his taller friend.

“He is.”

Then the super soldier looked at his teammates around him. His friends. And he saw his own feelings reflected in their eyes.

“And he is ours.”

______________________________________________________________

Read Part 4: here

Yeah, so this part was supposed to dive right into the chains and captivity and other stuff that I promised, but then I got caught up in the dialouge and, well....

I do hope you still liked it though. I will try to be faster with the next part.

[screechingtrashcalzonewombat]

"Apopalictic Astral Asending" Reavaluate disassociate my self worth...

The galaxies have birthed an uncontrollable being ....

I've feel as tho Ive seen myself split in two ..

Witch side do u wanna see if ur lucky I'll let you choose .

Cause in the end I loose..

One of hate one of love could both be from up above..

Or down below ...

I've began to show signs of delusions as half my mind goes an tells me it's only mild confusion. As my body fights my brain an heart to escape theys terrible illusions.

Yet the other half tries to start a fusion of body an mind an all the suddently my thoughts are no longer mine..

But a evil so Divine that its wound it's way threw time itself I've fealt the damage the energy dealt. I've yelped in anquish an pain been stuck for 7 long years in the rain with nothing to gain .. I can barely fathom to explain im not fully on earth I'm on another astral plane but i fear i flew out of my lane I've gone insane never wanted fame Ever fealt like bat man I mean oops Bruce Wayne. Nah fuck hes spoiled a wet rat infact I'm more like hulk duck when I'm near i wearly see I'm drowning inside my mind but no one can hear my dear I fear I've lost control again but cant compute I've been booted out of the system I've clawed hit an kicked to try to get to the top but i outta of known I've been ripped an thrown from my throne ive been shown what this beast can do but who woulda thought a demon bought my soul ..a jackal a goul.....you'll see me shift into numbness I suposse it was my own dumbness for being to open now cause of me my body an mind are broken an stole. as I weep an shutter an i try to speak but only stutter I found myself weak in defeat ....as ik this demon reaching its peak will plunder an pillage the town I've found I'm bound to this beast nowhere to run not north south or east I can run it will feast on my soul until the end of time ..

For diamonds cannot compare to the rarity of a soul nor a bowl of Ruby's an jems rolled in gold .....

A bold statement you say........

.. theres no ray of light here they stole it away buried it in your mind but how can u define being locked trapped in yourself ...

You've dealt your own fate ...

Wanting ansers u dint deserve ..

Did you like your just dessert's...no?

Dose it hurt ..... After you itll kill children's childhood freinds like bernie & eart ....whent bizzirk an bashed there brains makeing bloody rains

curking on everyone with cutlery forks an knifes* slice *cook big bird with chives after I've shanked him 900 times... 100 more woulda been devine serve him drink to dry alone cooked an ripped him to the bone but not quite alone u may not be home inside but u can still watch...I thought I taught u better than to close ur eyes dont beg or look surprised look away an I'll adopt another stray to do the same a slow sweet death cure's my hunger anyway

.the wines innocents blood bitter sweet to the taste of the tounge

no one thought it capable I seemed...looked ...so young..

They dint know it had just begun it wasn't me but the evil half committing crime with glee an fleeing repetavidly revealingly images to my mind of times & crimes so sickening I thought I'd die forever scetched seered into my mind .binded with no power as one towers over you using your power you cowar for how dose one define the disasbalment of there an every defined mind while ur inner demon dines on flesh making a mess of your vessel you cant even wrestle your way to the light to stay only break down in defeat that your so far away you've became an internal mess cant even stand on ur feet the beast has u chained in defeat u cry an apologize looking for answers as of how to stop.....an then...you hear a voice .." you outta stayed silent instead of talk back. U shouldn't of complained do u still think ur life used to be pain...... . Ur a sack of shit ur wit is less than that of an ant not to rant but I'm not done yet I have ur soul now I'm never letting go no no no I have plenty more so much to show many souls to reap an emotions to subdue after all u said yes.....

...did you forget ur the one who started this.

mess ......you dressed your mind with fantasy an fiction word to the wise never mess with other worldly friction an your itching for a way out but I doubt ull get there before the end of time .after all you had a devil an an angel on ur shoulder an you chose wrong this time. Only took 666 times but I'm patient an always waiting for 6 years hating an burning flesh waiting for a prayer a call after all Lucifer was once an angel an the most beautiful you just dint get to see from what angle he had beauty wrath an determination but u humans resulted in his isolation incarsorason. So now we will end up being humanity's enialation when were done there entire selves with evaporate for the demons have released self hate to pro create creatures in confidence we annihilate the fate of the human race at least the trace slight like us able to bust threw dementions so weve mentioned a start to find the inordinary soul an heart ......humanity was doomed from the start.. you stole our purpose our reason to be......humans sit in sin an glee.

Your humanitys Pride is overbearing never genuinely caring ..

Greed is sweeping the nation its reached ever state an it's got a hot heaping plate of corruption for mankind's consumption greed is grotesque in its steps of the darkest quest to corupt ur mind an want. .want..want until that's all you are is wanting more

Lusting over losely draped garments you've tarnished ur soul .

Envy of what you do not posses but for all you know that information an life would make you a mess but ud still test ur envious tendencies.....

Glutton glutton what have you gained it's not knowledge no for it's to plain rather glutton uve found a urge that wont go away....

Wrath an vengeance blood draw too no one stops till some dies him or you....

Sloth last but not least cant forget you cause uuuh wait what that fuck do u do....you sleep an sulk sit slither out of simple tasks an that's why ur not 1st no ur last like humanity just ask ....

So soon the day will draw near the the number 4 is what you should fear our dear old freinds were sending up for a visit so they can reddit ur fate for each a horse an a trait the first out the door with bow in hand riding a white horse with bow in hand

..

Conquest the start of the final test leading the restthere dark version of light on a white stallion he leads the way an soon will follow hades anyway.

War was next on a red steed he rode prepared to purge an quench new blood for the wars an battels would just begin brother against brother an close of kin witch to win?

Famine foe of all on a black horse with the courses hair so fair merely bone but dont let his appearance fool you hes for he is full devouring your greed taking away everything you want or need an now ur rationed to nearly starvation stretching farther than destination world wide sensation...

Pleage reaper of souls slowly apears steadly trotting riding a very sickly steed looking pale an almost gruesome green with sores an sickness best keep a distance. For he shall be the bringer of death an reap you all one by one to the four you shall fall...

Will you be spared are you true....

Are you happy with your life what did you do...?

Rapture no you still must die.....

Say good by to this earthy chapter theres so much more that manifest after.

But only your earthly husk must rust an fall your all energy of grate mass....

It's time to take the task of self evolvment an enjoy an enlightened installment

this world was just step wrench ur third eye wide open an accept the token of eternal life.

Grinded it to atoms a flash of dust all together ur a self fulfilling must memory pass u in a rush.....

. sudently ur bodysuit is gone ....

But it dint felt like it quite belonged.

You were 7 grams of light matter to be exact an sudently you've cracked the atmosphere ..steering energetic waves my metal psyche caves to the new information flying threw stars consolations.

Suddently speeding at the sound of light the stratosphere seems to disapear ..

My fear is gonewithout a trace an freedom transferred in its place

but am waved in infatuation to find out about out true destination...

Restoration of the soul the goal of a higher self being achieved as I crash into the sun 1500°

I feel a warmth like no other each being hues of light I might of missed earth if not I heard a voice but a mental push no need for speech just thinking it shall be done said by the the brightest in the sun.

Rejoice at last but ur journeys yet to pass ..

This is merely were you start ....

Our flames grew high with frantic waves not wanting to give up the new life we were just gave

Suddenly our flames grew dim as we felt a swirling deep from withn sudently the surface of the sun turned to tin an bent in a cracked an caved with itself our time an space sending us ascending in alignment the same assignment.

Because the sun has begun to change ina twisted way a black hole some could say.

As all of our astral beings were ripped an tore apart at the seams we all merged an formed one all knowing creative being an sudently everything I've know has little matter I'm past a point of human chatter i understand infinity the holy trinity I down in the milky way an experienced every life I've relived it twice I've spliced my genetics into over 2000 million beings I've seen good an bad in between experienced every tragedy to build my strength an studyd every thesis an theory thread an chain nearly drove my vessel insane even took knifes threw my veins in anger yet it failed I was just a trailer.ive seen love hate an anger

Comprehension compasing many others I have love an understanding past many beings there anger seems to brush by me cause I'm with 2000 souls an minds that have formed one to reach a state I can medidate in the milky way an force your negative away .

Our astral self has accumulated complete power an understanding by costuming to our full potential our old body's merely a rental.

Gentle at first then bursted into power showered in knowledge I know now much that I wondered before but now I want more an I've thought till I an 2000 shared beings head hurt cause my girth of knowledge will now never be enough it's tough cause now I must find .... how to ascend again but for now i must defend my vast mind defind crime ...?

Keeping 2000 vast voices locked away so I can focus an try to learn anyway leaning in to vast places is I the 1st 2nd or 3rd or other many plains I cant quiet place I'm traveling threw them all searching for everything I couldn't before .

This life isent like the countless other this life I like it has interesting teathers

I've surpass Angel's an there feathers an vison of a hawk.

I've surpass demonds and there demonic temping talk ..

I've walked on water as I was ripped apart an I felt my self rebuilt every cell of my being got hit with rods of power lightning not even myself can fight me god like abilities the universe as built in me theres ben a spiritual shift a tilt in me somthing generations of DNA sprawled out in a numerical display my old life experiences is the price I pay so that I can be god even if only for a day

I think I'll sit an think somewere in the outter spink of the universe I've cursed myself with knowledge an now I'm aware step into my astral space....

If you dare...

[alloftheendgamefeelings]

Endgame spoilers

Talking about arcs, rewards, and empty space. And, because I’m me, explicitly tracing character arcs through all of the movies, even though anyone who cares enough to read this probably already knows.

The hardest part for me, dealing with Nat’s death Endgame, is realizing that there were a few different things happening simultaneously.

There was the arc I was reading into the ten years of the MCU, and I genuinely felt rewarded because, in interviews pre-movie, it sounded like Scarlett Johansson saw Natasha in the same way that I had: that what she wanted, more than anything, was to find a place where she belonged, where she could love and be loved without fear of rejection. Where she was valued as a person rather than just as an asset.

And you can trace it. In IM2, you can see her realizing that while Iron Man isn’t qualified for the Avengers Initiative, his found family is what makes him special. You see it in her careful recitation of “love is for children” but her absolute loyalty to Clint. You see it in how she puts in the work to befriend Steve. You see how she just accepts that Tony doesn’t trust her because of IM2 in Avengers, but how hurt she is that Steve doesn’t trust her in Cap2, or that Nick’s’ small circle excluded her. You see it in her only goal in Cap3 being to keep the team together, joining Team Stark not because she believed in the Accords but because it was the best way to stop them from being separated, and she went to Steve in that church and she gave him as much of herself as she could.

And there was another arc, the one I liked much less. The one that kept repeating. The one where, since the time when Clint recruited her, no one has ever just accepted that she’s not a threat. We see it over and over: other characters don’t trust Natasha, and she has to do the work to prove that she’s trustworthy, and they grudgingly agree to accept her until the next time she has to show she’s worth taking a risk on even if their goals aren’t exactly identical.

But then there’s the arc that was on screen. If you actually look at what was in the movies- not the deleted scenes, not the novelizations, not the interviews, not what we got out of comics- so little of this is actually there. So much of it is those of us who care about Nat connecting dots (about her and around her), and making educated guesses.

As a result, we never actually find out what, canonically, she wants. And when you think about this movie, you realize: that’s not true for any of the rest of them.

Clint wanted his family happy and safe. We see that in how no one knew about them until Ultron, we see how much it kills him to leave them in Civil War, and we see how even though he’s wearing an ankle monitor he’s delighted to be picnicking with his wife and kids. His relief when Laura calls is palpable, and we see how close he holds the kids during Tony’s funeral.

Bruce didn’t want to be a monster, too dangerous to be around people. And while we have no idea HOW he became Professor Hulk, he did it, and now the guy who thought his inability to have kids made him a monster has them coming up to him for photographs.

Thor never wanted to be king, but it was his responsibility. Once New Asgard was settled and he’d killed Thanos, he felt lonely and directionless, and mostly just played Fortnite. He got one last time to spend with his mom, which gave him the boost he needed to consider a new life: one where he lets someone else take the crown, who can actually handle it, who he trusts, while he gets to fuck off to space to have more adventures.

Tony wanted to not grow up to be his father, but also wanted his dad’s approval. He got both of those. We see how much he loved Morgan, and how well he took care of her; we see how he was able to advise his father, and even get that hug.

Steve... Steve’s a weird case here, because he talked about that missed dance, and he got it. The missed dance always seemed like a metaphor for all the things he’d missed out on, and that he’d chosen a different path, and everyone lives with regrets and etc. But here he got the opportunity to take exactly what he’d always held up as that one big thing he missed, and he took it. Whether or not it works for you as a viewer, he got exactly what he’d been looking for since his first movie.

My first instinct was to say that Nat, in this movie, doesn’t get what she wants. And while I stand by that, I also can’t prove it, because we don’t KNOW what she wants as much as they wanted those things. In this movie she says she’d always wanted a family and now she has it with the team, but we don’t get to see that. We see what they mean to her; we don’t see that she means the same to them.

So the closest Natasha gets to joy is probably flying with Clint on the way to her death, and that isn’t the same as, say, Scott’s realization that Cassie isn’t missing. Every other character gets the joy of human connection. Natasha gets “Shit, space is cool.”

So going back to her death- it would have been upsetting no matter what. Because she wasn’t getting what she wanted. But if they’d done more with the aftermath, it could have been a cap to her arc of wanting a place to belong. It could have shown that it wasn’t just how much her family meant to her, but how much she meant to them.

I mean, look. Clint is clearly upset with the cost of the soul stone. Bruce tried to bring her back with the gauntlet. The whole team made noises about valuing her, and I don’t doubt it.

But her loss had no real narrative weight- not like Tony’s did. There was not a single moment during the fight where they acknowledged we could really use Natasha to help us win here. As much as I felt it (I sobbed), the gorgeous scene with all the women fighting doesn’t seem to really HAVE that bittersweet note of how Nat should be there. There was not a moment where anyone realized how much she’d always been responsible for, in terms of handling the aftermath. Clint’s kids call Natasha “Auntie Nat,” but we don’t see them mourning her, while we do see them at Tony’s funeral. We don’t see anyone surprised that Natasha chose to sacrifice herself for Clint and for her family and for the world, but we also don’t see anyone grateful for it.

Don’t get me wrong. Natasha was resplendent in this movie. She was brave, and noble, and good. She did what no one else was strong enough to do: she stayed, and she worked, and she gave all that she could for five years of absolute devastation, and then she gave even more. Natasha was a hero. But from Iron Man 2 on, Natasha was a hero. She didn’t grow to this point. She was here all along.

You know the biggest Nat moment for me all movie? It wasn’t her at the desk with all the people reporting in, or even her dying to let Clint live. It was the moment when Steve checked to see if she was okay, because in her previous six movies, that was never something anyone thought to do- after extreme trauma, sure, but not just when she was doing something hard. That moment of her not being taken for granted was a throwaway line, but I had so much hope that it was leading to more. And it didn’t.

So maybe the answer is that Natasha’s arc didn’t have an ending, because Natasha never had an arc. Other characters’ shifting perspectives of her never had to follow a path, and her journey never had to, because no one- aside from ScarJo and parts of the audience, I guess- cared about it. But I don’t like that read at all. I want to read Natasha’s sacrifice as closure.

I want there to be something I missed that proved that her growth was important to the Infinity Saga. I am trying so fucking hard to find a way that Natasha’s actions in this movie signified growth for her, rather than just a way for the narrative to remove one of the pieces and prove its stakes.

If you find one, please let me know.

[thruces]

endgame spoilers

i know i said i wasn’t gonna do this but ???

i have so many thoughts and feelings and i want somewhere to get them out so let’s dive right in shall we? (spoilers under the cut!) 

i firstly want to point out that most of this won’t be chronological since my thoughts are everywhere.

to say i have some thoughts is definitely understating it. there was a lot to take in throughout the movie but i feel as though i went in with high expectations and came out with something less than what was promised by the countless fan reactions and reviews. i wasn’t expecting what i got but there was a lot of good despite the bad. it’s also worth noting i ended up fainting out of stress and partial dehydration (from crying for nearly six hours straight) which is further proof that i’m an emotional wreck as well as a fool.

first off, tony’s death. – there was no real reason for him to die. he finally had the life he wanted and had to sacrifice that for the rest of the world. he never needed to redeem himself, he didn’t have to die to make up for anything but they still made him. he should’ve had steve’s ending. somehow steve rogers, the super solider who stated on a number of occasions that he didn’t want the domestic life, got it. tony stark, the man who wanted to step away from the battlefield and have a family was the one who died fighting. it hurt so much to watch a man who survived everything thrown at him, who lived through trauma, ptsd, anxiety attacks and tremendous loss only to finally get the life he deserved and have it all taken from him. what hurts even more is that strange knew what had to happen, it must’ve been so awful knowing what had to be done. the sadness in his eyes as he put his finger up was devastating. tony stark will always be my hero and i’m going to miss him so, so much.

expanding a little more on steve’s ending – it felt wrong. most of steve’s arc was centred around bucky and yet he chose to leave him. it was like the past two captain america movies became irrelevant and all that mattered was getting rid of steve in the simplest way. peggy had a whole life without him and he knew that but chose to go back and stay regardless? idk that just didn’t sit right with me.

onto thor – they did him so, so dirty. thor lost everything and suffered so much and they still just tried to play him off as comedic relief for most of the movie (although the fortnite scene was kinda funny) . the scene with banner in his house hurt me so much. to see the way he cared for him, the softness in his voice. he understood his trauma and was patient. the way he put his hand on his shoulder and wanted to be there for him was one of the best scenes in the film. he didn’t judge him harshly for letting himself go because he understood what it was like to go through trauma and loss in the way he had. it was genuinely one of the best scenes. thank u russos for the good thruce content.

in terms of the rest of the ragnarok crew – i was so happy to see korg again! my eyes lit up as soon as i saw him in his cute hawaiian shirt!  taika waititi is the source of my happiness and he should direct every mcu movie. i’m so happy val made an appearance too and becoming queen is exactly what she deserved, although i did kinda miss her deadpan attitude. overall the ragnarok gang was the biggest let down for me in terms of characterisation. the russos will never be able to do them justice. they used thor as comedic relief despite his trauma, banner’s arc was one of the worst ones in the movie (my love for him remains untouched though) and the other characters were pushed aside (although it’s completely understandable as the focus on this movie was the original avengers). additionally the hulk dab scene filled me with rage for reasons i can’t explain,, i just,, hated it so much,, more than anything else in the entire movie. 100 percent the worst line in the entire mcu,, ever,,

next up is nat’s death – in my op this was the best death in the film and although i love nat her death made the most sense. the way she was gentle and calm when she told clint to let go broke me and i felt so bad for him, go me it was definitely one of the most powerful scenes.

time to expand on banner’s arc bc it’s one of the biggest things i disliked. why the fuck did they think just getting rid of the hulk was the best thing to do? they’ve been developing the banner/hulk arc for years then deadass just got rid of him? it’s so sad bc the hulk developed a lot over the last three movies and now it’s just over? it’s esp sad when you think about the fact that a. the hulk was his own being and b. that this was barely addressed at all? the entire characterisation of banner during the movie was absolutely wack and i’m so mad they did him dirty. the two best banner scenes were the gauntlet scene and the thor scene and everything else was just,, bad. can they please just bring back cute tiny bruce who’s dorky and into science bc that’s the one i fell in love w/, not this weird hulk/bruce hybrid that marvel pulled outta their asses (that’s my hot take and you’re fine to disagree but i hate it sm)

i also wanna talk about thor and frigga real quick bc honestly? my heart never felt true pain until then. she was so calm and the entire scene broke my heart into pieces. ik thor got some closure but it still felt so awful to see him so heartbroken.

if i'm being honest i’m not really feeling the asguardians thing. dgmw i love them as separate units but to me it takes away the entire team dynamic of the guardians and i really hope it’s not a permanent thing. i also hope they get gamora back because it’s what peter deserves.

time to talk about the best part of the film – scott. my boy absolutely killed it. his character arc over the course of the movie was the best one. the balance between comedy and plot was perfect and the scene where he saw cassie grown up made me sob. i can’t fully express how much i love him as a character but i promise it’s a lot.

there’s a lot of stuff i missed out but these were my main thoughts after seeing the movie, hopefully i’ll pick up on more when i see it again on monday! if you wanna talk about any of these PLEASE message me because i’m really interested to hear other ppls opinions!

[gokinjeespot]

off the rack #1301

Monday, February 17, 2020

 Happy Family Day. I'm grateful for my extended family of fellow comic book aficionados. Sharing the love of our hobby keeps me young and brightens my life. I miss seeing many of you but you are in my thoughts.

 Catwoman #20 - Joelle Jones (writer) Fernando Blanco (art) FCO Plascencia (colours) Saida Temofonte (letters). Mrs. Creel poisons her party guests showing us what a nasty woman she is. Catwoman fights through a bunch of zombies to get some Lazarus Water to save a friend. Selina's final obstacle will be Mrs. Creel. I can't wait for this story to end. It's been kind of blasé.

 Thor #3 - Donny Cates (writer) Nic Klein (art) Matthew Wilson (colours) VC's Joe Sabino (letters). Lots of KRAKKABOOMS this issue as Thor fights Beta Ray Bill. Horseface doesn't have a chance with All-Father Thor boosted with Galactus given power cosmic. Don't build a funeral pyre for Bill yet. Someone comes to his rescue and that person is a surprise.

 The Dollhouse Family #4 - M. R. Carey (writer) Peter Gross (layouts) Vince Locke (finishes) Cris Peter (colours) Todd Klein (letters). Alice and her daughter recover from the horrible explosion from last issue but their survival cost them an arm and a leg. When Alice gets back to the dollhouse, she finds there's a new tenant and she's not nice at all. This horror title isn't horrible. You should come visit.

 Hawkeye: Freefall #3 - Matthew Rosenberg (writer) Otto Schmidt (art) VC's Joe Sabino (letters). This issue explains how Clint can be in two places at one time. It's dumb but I don't mind because this story is kind of dumb. I like it for the guest stars. The Black Widow shows up and the hero on the last page is a favourite of mine. If the new Ant-Man mini had been this much fun I'd still be reading it.

 The Batman's Grave #5 - Warren Ellis (writer) Bryan Hitch (pencils) Kevin Nowlan & Bryan Hitch (inks) Alex Sinclair (colours) Richard Starkings (letters). I don't know if it's just me, but I find that I lose interest in a Warren Ellis story somewhere and this issue might be it. I've forgotten what the mystery is that put Batman in detective mode even though he's following a lead in Arkham Asylum this issue. I like seeing Batman kick bad guy butt as much as the next fan, but 8 pages of it here seems to be padding the story. Methinks this 12-issue story could've been told in 6.

 Savage Avengers #10 - Gerry Duggan (writer) Patch Zircher (art) Java Tartaglia (colours) VC's Travis Lanham (letters). Conan and the two Doctors, Doom and Strange, battle Kulan Gath. Guess who wins? This issue made me laugh out loud.

 Jessica Jones: Blind Spot #3 - Kelly Thompson (writer) Mattia De Iulis (art) VC's Cory Petit (letters). Now this is a much more enjoyable murder mystery than Batman's Grave. I know exactly what's happening because Kelly Thompson recaps as the investigation continues. There's even an extended 5-page fight scene where Jessica and Elsa Bloodstone fight creatures from the Black Lagoon but it isn't boring because they're bantering about the case all the while. The rest of this 6-issue mini can't come out fast enough for me.

 Harley Quinn & Poison Ivy #6 - Jody Houser (writer) Adriana Melo (pencils) Mark Morales (inks) Hi-Fi (colours) Gabriela Downie (letters). Harley and Ivy's adventure comes to an end with a battle between good and evil Ivy. I liked how they left the fate of Poison Ivy a mystery. Who knows how she'll act the next time she sees Harley?

 X-Force #7 - Benjamin Percy (writer) Oscar Bazaldua (art) Guru-eFX (colours) VC's Joe Caramagna (letters). This issue features Domino who was rescued from the bad guys recently. The bad guys managed to steal her good luck powers and have transferred them to someone else. This newly empowered individual is an assassin going around killing mutant supporters. Neena's not too happy about that. I wasn't too surprised by the reveal of the assassin's identity on the last page but I'm sure some new fans will be.

 X-Men #6 - Jonathan Hickman (writer) Matteo Buffagni (art) Sunny Gho (colours) VC's Clayton Cowles (letters). This issue features Mystique. She's my favourite shape-shifter. She's sent on a mission to infiltrate the space station designed to fight against the mutants. I liked how the flashbacks merged with this story to culminate at the ominous last page.

 The Immortal Hulk #31 - Al Ewing (writer) Joe Bennett (main story pencils) Ruy Jose, Belardino Brabo & Cam Smith (main story inks) Paul Mounts (main story colours) Javier Rodriguez (McGowan sequence pencils & colours) Alvaro Lopez (McGowan sequence inks) VC's Cory Petit (letters). We get into the heads of Scientist McGowan and the Hulk this issue. Matters of the mind shouldn't surprise fans what with Xemnu being in this story.

 The Amazing Spider-Man #39 - Nick Spencer (writer) Iban Coello (art) Brian Reber (colours) VC's Joe Caramagna (letters). This issue reminded me of the Odd Couple, Oscar and Felix. Spider-Man agrees to be a guest on Jonah's podcast and sparks fly as the two antagonists butt heads. It's all talk radio until the super villain crashes the party. Next issue should be less talk  and more action.

 Superman: Heroes #1 - Brian Michael Bendis, Matt Fraction & Greg Rucka (writers) Kevin Maguire, Mike Perkins, Steve Lieber, Mike Norton & Scott Godlewski (art) Paul Mounts, Gabe Eltaeb, Andy Troy & Nathan Fairbairn (colours) Troy Peteri, Clayton Cowles & Simon Bowland (letters). This $5.99 US one-shot is tied-in quite closely with what's been going on in Action Comics & Superman. It looks at the consequences of Superman revealing his secret identity and it's well worth reading.

 Doctor Strange #3 - Mark Waid (writer) Kev Walker (art) Java Tartaglia (colours) VC's Cory Petit (letters). This is a great one issue story if you want to check this new run out. Doctor Strange fights an artistic demon to save lives.

 Gwen Stacy #1 - Christos Gage (writer) Todd Nauck (art) Rachelle Rosenberg (colours) VC's Joe Caramagna (letters). I liked this better than The Amazing Mary Jane maybe because it deals with a younger high school aged Gwen. This story takes place before Gwen and Peter become friends and lovers and involves her father Captain Stacy and his investigation of New York's mob. There are a trio of bad guys that you'll recognise but the big deal super villains don't show up until the last page. If they don't get you to pick up the next issue, nothing will.

 Batman: Pennyworth R.I.P. #1 - James Tynion IV & Peter J. Tomasi (writers) Eddy Barrows & Eber Ferreira, Chris Burnham, Marcio Takara, Diogenes Neves, David Lafuente and Sumit Kumar (art) Adriano Lucas, Rex Lokus & Nathan Fairbairn (colours) Travis Lanham & Thomas Napolitano (letters). This one-shot tribute to Alfred shows us what a dysfunctional family Bruce has created. I would have preferred a more touching send off to this beloved character like the one Brian Michael Bendis wrote for Ultimate Spider-Man/Peter Parker. Damian, Tim, Jason and Barbara reminisce about the butler and then Ric Grayson chimes in with a story about Nightwing. Who the heck is Ric Grayson? I thought Alfred deserved better than this.

 Nebula #1 - Vita Ayala (writer) Claire Roe (art) Mike Spicer (colours) VC's Travis Lanham (letters). I'm ambivalent when it comes to this cyborg killer but I wanted to see if that might change by reading this 5-issue mini. She finds a scientist who has built a device that can predict the future and has him implant it so it's integrated into her cybernetic system. The untested tech winds up screwing with her head. I didn't change my opinion of Nebula with this first issue and I can see where the rest of the story is going so I'll leave the rest on the racks.

 Superman #20 - Brian Michael Bendis (writer) Ivan Reis, Joe Prado & Oclair Albert (art) Alex Sinclair & Jeremiah Skipper (colours) Dave Sharpe (letters). There's action: Superman dukes it out with Mongul. There's drama: The Daily Star is trying to discredit Clark, Lois and the Daily Planet. And there's a surprise appearance of an old friend. There's everything a good comic book needs to grab my attention and want to keep reading.

 Marvels X #2 - Alex Ross & Jim Krueger (writers) Well-Bee (art) VC's Cory Petit (letters). I was fooled by the truck driver who picked up the kid because of the red beard, sunglasses and No Fear baseball cap. I thought it was Matt Murdock in disguise but I was surprised by who it actually was. Daredevil does turn up later in this issue as he and Spider-Man help to keep David safe. The kid's important because he could help find a cure for what's infecting humanity.

[scifrey]

My Very Spoilery Endgame Review - What I Liked, What Annoyed Me, and Two Questions I Am Left With

I was very satisfied and enjoyed it very much. The theater burst into applause in several instances and it was great to celebrate the end of an era with fellow fans.

Now for the spoilery critiques and praise.

My favorite moments were:

Thor reconciling his self-image and self-worth with his mother

“I’m still worthy.”

Loki escaping and (hopefully) living in at least one timeline - because if Steve went back to “trim the branches” then this means he returned the Tesseract to 1970. Which means the branch where Loki snagged the Tesseract and was not imprisoned on Asgard may have endured*. 

Ken Jeong’s cameo.

Stan Lee’s cameo.

Banner coming to terms with who and what he is and living comfortably with the Hulk.

Basically everyone really leaning into the self-love  and self-value by the end of the film.

“That is America’s Ass”.

“I could do this all day.” “Yeah, I know.”

“How can I? You’re taking all the stupid with you.”

“Ha! I knew it!”

“I am Iron Man.”

Scott finding Cassie alive.

Wong’s exasperated reply to Strange’s “Is that everyone?”

Nebula’s redemption. This is a princess (as Squidward calls Thanos “sire”) who saves her own damn self.

How the thing that gave the game away to Thanos was actually really clever and well executed; this wasn’t a “heroes are just stupid this one time” (like how Quill screwed the pooch in Infinity War when they had the damn glove). It was something that I genuinely hadn’t thought of, and I assume no one, not even Nebula, would have thought of. It worked. And it worked well.

All the ladies supporting Carol in the final battle - which was awesome but also felt a bit like the moment was added only so the Russos could check it off a “don’t piss off the feminists” list.

How the final battle set it up well for the next phase - I liked how the Glove Relay was from an OG Avenger (Hawkeye) to the new Avengers - Black Panther, Spider-man, and Captain Marvel.

“I love you 3000″.

Falcon!Cap - finally! Yay!

The sound of the armor that started it all being forged as the endcap of the credits.

However.

I wish Bucky and Steve had also had a meaningful moment at the end, like Steve and Sam, something that made it clear that even though Steve was older now, he was no less Bucky’s best pal. 

I'm very, very annoyed that they Fridged Natasha. I mean, I get it. Someone had to die. And we all knew Hawkeye was going to go back to his family, so it wouldn’t be him. And I do love how they did the death, how Nat and Clint fought with one another to the be the one to make the sacrifice. And her death would have been especially cheap if Bruce had just Snapped her Back. I get it.

And if there wasn’t a long history of Fridging female character to ensure the male ones have enough Man-Pain to have a character arc and impetus to be a hero, then you know what? This would have been a really moving sacrifice. It would have really worked.

But there is. And in light of that, it’s left me... itchy. Uncomfortable. Because in the context of the film alone it was a great death. But in the context of the history of comic book narratives, it sucked.

Also, what does this mean for the Black Widow movie? Will it actually be a prequel? Will it be Budapest? And if it is Budapest, will they use the same actors, or cast new, younger ones?

I also don't understand the narrative reason why they had to make so many fat jokes around Thor.

I mean, yeah, it makes sense he was depressed and stopped taking care of his heath, and self-medicated with booze and food. This was a strong and meaningful narrative and I really liked that he was given the opportunity to mourn, to question his purpose, to become more than just muscles and a hammer in terms of character construction. That he could grieve and struggle, and be filled with crippling regret that kept him indoors and hiding, and filled self-loathing.

 As a character choice it made sense. And I liked that he was still a powerful warrior while chubby, and that he didn’t magically become slim again when he suited up. It was wonderful to see him be no less powerful, dangerous, dedicated, and no less kick ass while sporting a keg instead of a sixpack. 

But they leaned awfully hard on that “fat joke” button and by the time Rhodey said “Cheez Whiz?” I was over it. Its got tedious and frankly a bit insulting.

Teasing someone for suffering because he lost literally everyone he loved is not cool. The jokes fell flat, for good reason. They were cruel.

And when the Russos announced that they had included the MCU's first openly gay character I was hoping that it would be a main character, not some rando dude in a talk therapy meeting. I wanted Bucky and Sam to confess feelings, or Bucky to Steve even if Steve couldn’t return them, or Valkyrie to at least have a wife in New Asgard, or something.

But TBH it didn't surprise me that they made it some nameless dude in group support. Like J.K. Rowling, the Russos are happy to queerbait but too cowardly to commit, and they always have been. I’d be annoyed but it’s not worth the energy. 

At least when the guy mentioned his boyfriend it was a “no big deal” mention, and nobody made a “are you cool with this, Cap?” thing to really point out that ooooo, this dude is queer.

But those are my only gripes. The rest of it was thoroughly enjoyable and satisfying.

Especially all the little call backs. The "I am Iron Man" and “I could do this all day” stuff - it felt like little gifts to the fandom.

However, I have two questions.

1) When people were Snapped Back, were they Snapped to their previous exact geographical location? Because if so, what about people who had been in transit? Did people who were Snapped Away while in a plane just... appear mid-sky and plummet to their deaths? Were people on spaceships Snapped Back into the void of cold space? We saw in Infinity War that helicopters crashed into city streets - the pilot, that means, was Snapped Away. When that pilot came back, where did he come back? Did Bruce think to Snap them all into safe places? (I mean, I assume the Stones accounted for Spacial Drift and the location of planets in orbit... maybe it accounted for people who would have Snapped Back into deadly situations?)

2) I do love that Steve and Peggy got their life together At that point Pegs would have been like... at least 10 years older than Steve? Maybe 15? What would her neighbors think of Sugar Momma Peggy Carter and her Very Much Younger (Looking) Husband?

Did she introduce him to anyone? Did they have neighborhood BBQs? At that point everyone would have known who Captain America/Steve Rogers was so did no one recognize him? What did they say? (Did we get Beardy Steve back???) They had kids, canonically, so was Steve able to attend their T-BAll games and school plays?

One assumes that Sugar Baby Steve would have been the House Husband, because Pegs was running Shield and Steve was out of the game. He’d never be able to show his face at SHIELD because Howard would recognize him, and so would Arnim Zola, so HYDRA would have known that Captain America survived and I imagine they would have given anything to get him into the Chair.

It makes me think that Sugar Baby House Husband Steve would have been very isolated and possibly lonely. Maybe he had a few neighbor friends, but can you image how torturous it must have been to live so privately? To know that Bucky was out there suffering and being tortured and brainwashed and that he couldn’t do anything about it? He couldn’t go save his best pal?

That Peggy could never bring him to the SHIELD Christmas party, to visit her new baby godson Anthony, never attend anything with him.

And it makes me think Steve had to vanish from her life right when his earlier self entered it so like... as soon as she started getting sick enough with Alzheimer's he had to leave. 

Because that’s when younger Steve came into her life, and started visiting her in the nursing home. 

But he had to abandon her when she needed him most, and that is very tragic. How did Steve reconcile that with himself? Especially with returning to a future where she was dead and his friends were alive and he didn’t need to be the Secret Sugar Baby House Husband any more?

All in all, it was very enjoyable and I will watch it again. 

And I look forward to the FanFic.

* This means that Loki in that branch also likely did not participate in the battle against the Dark Elves. His character growth in that moment was likely delayed, but I believe he ultimately would have processed his extreme confusion, self-loathing, and hatred of his betrayal by his “family” Thor enough to join forces with him against the destruction of the universe when it mattered. Perhaps having the extra time to do so might have even served him better.  I don’t know if this means Odin chose to die and Hela was released, thus triggering the destruction of Asgard. I don’t know what this would have meant for Ragnarock - possibly with Odin as the King when he died the defenses would have been better (though I argue the culture and peace of Asgard thrived under Loki, especially with his dismantling of the Empire and the valuing of the Arts) and they would have saved Asgard or at least not lost so many.

And if Asgard had not survived, perhaps in this version something different may have happened, and Loki wouldn’t on the survivor ship. Perhaps he was on a different ship. Perhaps he wasn’t present for the battle at all and in a completely different part of the universe.

If he was elsewhere this means 

a) The Asgardian survivors would have lived because Thanos wouldn’t have targeted the ship, and Thor would have been less self-loathing. 

b) When Thanos found Loki with the Tesseract in this branch, it’s likely Loki was able to ingratiate himself to Thanos and gave the Stone to him without Thor there to tip his hand toward an immediate betrayal murder attempt. I subscribe to the theory that Loki was just as mind-controlled during The Avengers and the Battle of New York as Barton (though I wouldn’t call Loki totally innocent in everything) and that he had been suffering from extreme mental health issues following his unsuccessful attempted suicide. In this case, he would be willing to play the long game to get his revenge on his abuser Thanos. Then, later, hopefully, he joins Thor’s side to save the universe against Thanos (as he did against the Dark Elves)- betraying Thanos and perhaps stopping the Snap before it happened in that timeline. Or if not stopping the Snap, perhaps being a part of the new Avengers if he survived it, or joining in the final battle if he was Snapped Away.

Anyway - I have lots of Loki Thoughts. Feel free to adopt any Plot Bunnies this may have generated in reading this. 

[promqueenpadfoot]

Requited Love

Tony Stark x reader

Warning: Fluff and slight angst

Reader Loves Tony, but does he love her back?

Written by: PromQueenPadfoot

Word Count: 1951 words

Tony Stark: Genius, Billionaire, Playboy and Philanthropist. The sole owner of your affection and interest. The man who identifies as Iron man and does not hide it from the world. An anomaly inside an anomaly, wholly worth studying in its entity. Your secret crush.

It wasn't intentional, you didn't plan to like him. Ok, love him. It just happened. You realised it around a year ago, the truth of it hit you like a freight truck. You were in the kitchen showing Thor how to "cook" Pop tarts in the microwave. When seemingly from no where Stark shows up, clearly hungover from a night of self-pity drinking, as beautiful and as well put together as ever. "Is there something on my face (Y/n)" he asks seemingly annoyed by your staring and it hit you. You loved Tony Stark. You wanted to protect him from his own self-destructive patterns and hide him away. Hidden with you.

A year had slowly gone by. Natasha was the first to find out, a whole month after you did. You were undercover on a mission together, and you confessed your love in your sleep one night. Fair to say when you woke up you were bombarded with questions of a varied nature, as well as claims to already knowing. Sworn to secrecy Nat remained the only one who knew.

Until another mission, five months after Nat found out. It was supposed to be a simple in and out. And it was, if not including the fact you were shot three times in the stomach. Dr Helen Cho was patching you up and Bruce watched on, learning how to do the same just incase it happened again. When that attractive, Genius, Idiot walked in to check on how I was doing. Because "We wouldn't want you out of action for long (Y/N/N)". Needless to say you were  grateful it was Banner checking your Heart Rate Stats. According to him they were through the roof, obvious as to who I was Pining after. He too promised not to tell Tony, else he would be left with a bruised eye Hulk or not.

He didn't know yet, to your knowledge that is. And you don't plan on telling him. If he found out, which he won't, he wouldn't want  to know you. Which is why you plan on never telling him. Never. Not even if your life depended on it.

(Stark)

Why me. Why couldn't she love Bruce? Heck, even Falcon would be a better choice. I don't deserve her affection. Not that she has to tell me, she can't know I know. Because then I'll have to tell her I love her too. If only she and Nat could be quieter when talking.

There is literally no option that could make this turn out well. Other than the option that she gets over me and moves on. I don't deserve her. At all.

I am a broken mess. I have too many problems too be one of her problems. I couldn't do that, not to her. She's everything I am not. She's beautiful and attractive. Kind and wise. Heck I've loved her since I met her. But she's to light for me to corrupt with my darkness. I have to make her hate me. No matter how much it hurts.

(Reader)

Lunch at the Avengers Tower was one of the only scheduled things in the teams lives. The only normal in the day to day. Unspoken seating arrangements that remained no matter who was absent. Because within the hectic schedule of the Avengers, you all enjoyed to feel normal again. You and Loki always sat opposite each other, you were the only person not intimidated by his threats of throwing a knife across the table to surprise you. You had become close friends with the trickster and trusted him enough to believe he wouldn't stab you. At least not as badly as he stabs Thor. Sat next to you were Clint and of course to make life difficult Tony. You often found yourself distracted by his presence, sometimes leading you to forget Loki's existence. Or in his terms neglect Loki's existence. This would often cause for a foot to stomp against yours so as to draw your attention to Loki. Loki worked out your feelings for Tony on his own. Often a great weapon against you when nobody else was around. After all the God of Lies can tell when you lie to him.

Today however was different to any usual Lunch. Tony had swapped places with Falcon disturbing the arrangements everyone was used to. Slightly distressing you. Loki noticed the change in your mood and to lighten the mood decided to create a Clone. Who's only objective was to stab Thor.It became a reoccurring pattern of Tony avoiding you. Be it on missions you were assigned together, where you find yourself suddenly removed, or Tony to be replaced. Or in the Lab when he would leave as soon as you arrived.

And it hurt. It hurt enough for you to cry in front of Loki. Because if he can't even tolerate you, you know he'd never reciprocate your feelings.(Stark)Things were hard. It hurt him to avoid (Y/N) but what choice did he have? She was too good for him. He had to remind himself that or he would risk caving in and sweeping her into his arms. Well jumping on her to be less polite. Things had gotten out of hand in the eyes of one God of mischief. It annoyed him to no end that the one person residing in the forsaken tower who he thought of as a friend, was being made to feel miserable by the man she loved, the man who loved her. Loki had told (Y/N) on numerous occasions that Stark liked her back, in equal amounts. But you would not have it and simply said that if Tony did love you he wouldn't block you out. So he decided to take things into his own hands.

"Stark!" the trickster called as he entered the Lab

"Reindeer Games."                                                                 

"I presume you know why I am here."

"A bold assumption. Bold but incorrect"

"Your hurting (Y/N), and you know you are."

"I don't know what your talking about." Tony replied, shrugging the comment off of his shoulders.

"I'm the God of Lies Stark. Your feelings for the girl are obvious and if you don't act, she will find someone who will hurt her more than you believe you will."

"I never said that."

"But you thought it."

"I thought you were the God of Lies, not the God of telepathy."

"Can't I be both?" Loki replied, rolling his eyes as he did so.

"No. I am screaming profanities in my head and you aren't reacting so you are only the God of Lies." Tony leant back with an eyebrow raised just to seemingly prove his point.

"I've warned you Stark, act on it for her sake." Loki sauntered off, leaving a thoughtful Stark behind him.(Reader) Nat and (Y/N) were lying on Nat's bed watching Tangled and eating popcorn.

"I know its stupid," you began hesitantly, "But sometimes I like to think that I'm the Rapunzel and Tony secretly has fallen for me, just like Flynn Rider has for Rapunzel. And she just can't see it because she's too focused on the floating lamps." Cuddling into the duvet to hide your face.

Nat chewing on her lip starts to consider what she's about to say, until she notices your gentle sobs coming from the blanket nest.

"He knows, doesn't he Nat. He knows and he doesn't want me back. I'm not enough and he thinks so too."

"No (Y/N), yes it's true a lot of people know, it is pretty obvious your feelings for each other."

"Stop saying that"

"Which part?"

"The each other part. Its not an each other situation."

"It is. Trust me Stark is easier to read than you are. Anyway let me finish. You are more than good enough for Tony Stark. You are kind, funny, intelligent, beautiful, strong and loving. If he were to think of you as not good enough he would not be the genius he claims to be."

A knock at the door interrupts her rant. Looking at you to check you are happy for her to open it you nod.Another Knock sounds and she opens the door to none other than the cause of the misery Tony Stark.

"Hi, can I talk to (Y/N) please."

"Yeah just not in my room. Please feel free to use your own." She says with a slight bitter tone. She continues in a slight whisper, "Oh and Stark, make her cry again and the next time you piss it will be from your ear.""Understood Romanoff, don't worry I'm here to fix my mistake."

You go to leave silent and weary to Tony's movement.

"Love you Nat" you hug her goodbye

"Love you more." She responds. Closing the door behind you and leaving you with the man who has been causing you heartbreak.

The walk towards the elevator brings an uncomfortable silence with it. Tony eager to break the silence strikes up a conversation.

"How have you been?" he asks, kicking himself for his unoriginality.

"I have been ok." You reply cutting the conversation off, wanting the awkward encounter to end there.

"Please can you come with me to my room, I need to talk to you privately." Kicking himself mentally again for the cold professionalism that slipped into his speech, he lets out a relieved sigh when you nod in agreement.

Once arriving at his room you proceed to sit on the bed and watch him, allowing him to begin what it is he needs to say.

"I am so sorry (Y/N/N)." You sit there slightly shocked as you had expected to have to apologise yourself. "I have been ignoring you and pushing you away, for no other reason than my own insecurities. I have been so selfish but I promise you my intention was for you. I just didn't want you to be lumped with me, a man who is so many flaws in one skin."

"Tony" you try to interrupt but he continues pushing forward with his verbal vomit of emotion, as he sits on the bed next to you.

"I upset you because I don't deserve your love and your affection. The only way for you to find someone better was for me to upset you and I am so sorry because I am so miserable without you. I love you so much and it scares me because I don't deserve to love you."

"You really aren't that flawed you know." you begin taking a breath and wiping away the salt tacks under your eyes. "I'm gonna speak now and I beg you to listen. First of all it is not  for you to decide who I do or don't deserve that is for me to choose and I will choose you every time. I did not choose to fall like I have heck I never meant to like you but I do. There is nobody better Stark, you are it. And maybe it wont work out but the stupid thing about Love is that I want to try and make it work." "I am so sorry."

"Don't be, your intentions were good." You reassure him as you wrap your arms around him.

"I love you, it scares me because love doesn't come first but it has."

"True, you haven't taken me on a date yet."

"Well we will have to change that my love won't we."

Rating: Angst, Fluff

[captainpoopweinersoldier]

An anti-Infinity War Post

Because I wasn’t kidding and I’m tired of people assuming I’m upset because My Fav™ died.

Do not continue to read if you don’t want the movie spoiled. I have literally over 6 varieties worth of tags so people blacklisting don’t have to see this. Don’t come at me if you read this and get spoiled.

The running time alone is outrageous considering the things we were all waiting for took place in the last 30 minutes

Wakanda was essentially a prop. There was no essence of Wakanda. Okoye and M’Baku were both OOC, with this ‘edgy realist’ attitude that they were all going to die in the end... but for glory!!!!

Okoye, a woman who nearly murdered her husband for the sake of Wakanda’s survival and thriving is suddenly in battle.. for glory and honorable death!!!

T’Challa had far too little amount of screentime considering he is King of Wakanda. He was there just to fistbump Steve Rogers and do the ‘Wakanda Forever’ bit. 

Vision served entirely no purpose throughout the film. He was literally a placeholder for the stone, a means to have a dramatic and drawn out ending when Wanda should’ve removed the stone hours before Thanos showed up (and sorry - no emotional depth in that dragged out death scene. My entire row at the theater was screaming JUST KILL HIM ALREADY!!!!)

Which of course brings in the odd rationale for sentimentality in this film considering half of the planet is about to die. But whatev. 

Starlord getting in the way of them removing the glove was quite simply - MACHISMO BULL SHIT. Again, weird rationale for sentimentality that you literally end half the planets chance of survival for the sake of your own masculinity. It was funny with Thor, not when he was playing with people’s lives. DUMB.

Bucky’s lack of screen time (I would estimate as a minute and a half total tops (Literally have no idea why Sebastian was even on the press tour))

Whether it was purposeful or not, he looked not a lick happy to be joining a fight (let him be with his goats, dammit!!) and kind of went along with my worries that the Avengers are another form of Hydra when it comes to how they treat Bucky. 

Like, really Russo Bros.? Marvel spends 3 films establishing a relationship and they literally spoke one time in a 2 and half hour feature film??? And no, I don’t want their piss-ass excuse they gave about ‘well yknow it’s to be assumed they’ve seen each other between civil war and blablabalbaalaldafsdf’ 

Bucky died confused and alone

The mistreatment of Gamora is appalling and quite frankly offensive and harmful - especially considering she had the only interesting character/plot development out of anyone in the film. I am now completely hellbent on her getting her own movie. 

She is led to her death by a Nazi (not sure why Red Skull out of all characters was revived but OH WELL)

For 2 films we learn how her and her sister are victims of horrific abuse, Gamora’s own family decimated in minutes. Infinity War validates Thanos’s abuse with love being the reason

Thanos must kill someone he loves to get the stone. He kills Gamora. As an audience, we are told to believe he loves Gamora.

Gamora who was abused her entire fucking life

Her last living interaction is with her abuser

Who tells her he’s always loved her

Throws her to her death

And gets rewarded afterward. 

Thor being given a new eye under the assumption that he - a GOD - is somehow less capable with only one eye is ableist. Not to mention that is having a laugh with Norse Mythology 101.

What the fuck happened to Bruce Banner???!!!

He was a straight damsel-y moron the entire movie? Certainly not a scientist with like, half a dozen PhD’s??? I was waiting for them to portray him as drooling while clapping his hands offbeat. He also contributed nothing to the film overall. 

Now getting to the final deaths at the end...

The Clickbaiting of Movie Deaths

I have not seen a single viewer legitimately worried that any of the characters who disintegrated are, in fact, permanently dead.

Bc obvs they arent

Which goes to show this film is a prime example of lazy writers who believe that killing characters off = tactical shock value. It does not. It’s manipulative, uncreative, and it’s a blatant way to show how little you think of your audience’s intelligence. If there is no way for you to create a shocking cliffhanger to ensure your ticket sales for Part 2 than to kill off as many as beloved characters in as little time as possible - perhaps go back to the drawing board. 

To make matters worse, while everyone disintegrated in about half a second, of course Peter Parker got the long and slowly progressive disintegration so that we could cry even harder at his “I don’t wanna go!” sobs and the inevitable trauma for Tony. More manipulation. More laziness.

I didn’t cry.

‘cause It ain’t that deep.

But this movie (and Marvel in general tbh) really enjoys having no limits to powers/effects except for of course when they decide to alter powers/effects to get a reaction or convenient result.

Example: Thanos whooping the Hulk’s ass without breaking a sweat. 

But Steve Rogers can catch his fist. Ok.