#anyway I probably made a post that was basically the same as this about 6 months ago

[mctreeleth]

I have to get a whole lot of things done today before work that I have been putting off for forever so I got up early (by my standards) and took a vyvanse I had left over from when I stopped taking them (because I the number of panic attacks I was having was more debilitating than unmedicated ADHD) and I think that returning to it after a break has made me realise that they were less panic attacks and more sensory overload meltdowns. Like, sure I can get some graphic design work done and book a smoke alarm service and go to the post office, but also the fact that I have shoulders and I am incapable of not feeling them is just... so much.

In the perfect balance teepee of ADHD and autism, the ADHD pole has been shortened and is no longer providing support to the autism pole, which will cause everything to crash down very shortly.

[meowwnon]

the c in NRC stands for cat

synopsis: in which heartslabyul deals with a cat loving no-magic having ramshackle prefect. (headcanons) gn!yuu

RIDDLE ROSEHEARTS

when he saw you clinging to the raccoon-cat-thing at the entrance ceremony, he did not know how to react.

normal people would panic. normal people would avoid a fire-breathing monster-cat-whatever that was spewing absolute nonsense.

apparently not you, though. although, one could say you already aren’t normal, considering the lack of magic. it wasn’t just not that much potential, you were basically in the negatives.

anyways, cats.

he got a peek under your ceremonial robes, and you were wearing..

a pajama shirt with a cat print on it. it looked horrendous.

riddle himself grew up with.. well, a cat. beastperson. so he probably would only have a surface level of appreciation for their greatness.

6/10 for cat lovers, i guess. he wouldn’t really mind, but he’d think it a tad strange. lower points because it took him a while to finally start letting grim into areas of festivity. 

TREY CLOVER

this guy has siblings. like, siblings siblings. he’s used to being around people with strange interests (his brother tried to feed him a live insect once. not fun).

so, i’m sure he appreciates that your interests are on the much safer side of the wide, wide spectrum. 

except when the two of you hang out while he’s baking and suddenly ace and deuce are complaining about cat hair in their tarts.

please do not bring your cats in the kitchen, thank you very much.

he’d feed your cat(s)! very sweet guy.

8/10 for cat lovers! good ascend from riddles, except two points taken from him because one, the Cat™ isn’t allowed in the kitchen and two, he just seems like a dog person to me.

CATER DIAMOND

please do not turn the great grim into a marketable plushie.

cater.

just kidding, he wouldn’t do that.

or would he?

i think he’d be a good cat co-parent! just like trey, i think he’d feed your cat when you can’t, he’d catsit while you’re in class.. etc, etc.

mostly because the posts he makes of your cat blow up, but also because he likes your cat!

the level fluctuates depending if this cat is grim or not. please do not ask me why.

8/10 for cat lovers! not bad, not bad at all! except, now there’s merch of grim- and while he’s proud of himself (this is only to be expected for the great grim! according to him), you just wish you got some of the revenue.

ACE TRAPPOLA

no.

just, no.

i think he’d look at a cat litter and go, “what’s that?”. maybe he’d even try to sniff it.

gives off grew up with a dog vibes, i don’t know why.

he goes like “EUGH” when he finds cat hair in the food you made for him.

you felt kinda bad, but he ate it anyways while complaining. you were pretty conflicted.

he’d be.. i don’t know. unremarkable. not that good, though.

5/10 for the cat lovers. no comment. this gremlin, i swear.

DEUCE SPADE

he LITERALLY isn’t any better than ace.

maybe he used to feed some of the stray cats on the way home from school when he was in elementary, but that’s probably the extent of his experience.

will also complain about cat hair. politely.

“uhm.. i think grims hair is in my soup?” kind of polite. except he’s grimacing and staring at grim like the cat just insulted his mother and all his ancestors.

he will also sniff your cat litter. and grim will laugh in the heartslabyul first year duo’s faces.

thanks, grim.

5/10 for the cat lovers.. again. he’s really just the same. he’d probably be nicer than ace, but the latter just has more experience with pets. probably. hopefully.

special guest, IDIA SHROUD!

do i even need to say anything?

you two have matching cat print pajamas. ortho would cry tears of joy if he could.

you bring your cats to ignihyde and you all hang out. <3

you, idia, and your 23 cats. it really is the life.

he paid you in genesis crystals for permission to pat one of your cats on the head.

you two have a cat lovers gc where you just send cat pictures and talk about your cats, very fun.

10/10 for cat lovers!  first ever 10/10, and it’s from idia shroud? riddle is seething. great cat parent! though, he’s a bit attached. it’s okay, though, he buys your cats toys.

[darkshrimpemotions]

People miss the point about Dean's interaction with Marta the post office lady in 14x13 so hard and it's FRUSTRATING.

No, it's not a reversal of the running gag about older women finding Sam attractive (which is gross anyway because it usually involves playing his obvious discomfort at being touched without consent for laughs). It is also not just Dean trading on his looks and flirting to get what he wants.

The point is to illustrate a significant difference between the brothers!

Specifically how they interact with the community of Lebanon, and what that says about their characters.

At this point in the show, Sam and Dean have now lived in Lebanon for like, six and a half years. And yet Sam approaches this woman like he would approach any stranger or witness in any random town in the country. And she reacts to him like any witness would to a strange man asking questions--with caution and some level of suspicion. It is incredibly clear that they don't know each other at all, despite how long they've been living in the same community.

But Dean knows her! And not just by sight and in passing. He's on a first name basis with her! He asks about her grandson and she readily answers! She knows his first name, too! They very clearly have an established report and have talked many times, enough times for her to have complained to him about her "spoiled little jerk" of a grandson!

This scene establishes that Dean is a known entity to at least some of the people of Lebanon. A known and LIKED entity. Trusted, even! He has truly put down roots there in a way that Sam has not, despite them living there for the same amount of time. He's bonded with people he sees regularly. He has little interactions with them offscreen all the time. That tells us something about Dean as a character!

And if it's a reversal or play off of anything, it's 1x11 (Scarecrow) when Dean fails to convince a couple who is in danger to let him fix their car so they can leave town sooner. Dean assumes (incorrectly IMO) that it's because HE specifically comes off to "normal people" as abnormal and dangerous, whereas Sam would be able to convince them with just a sincere look. In reality, of course, it probably has more to do with Dean being a total stranger, with no obvious credentials for car-fixing other than his word, in an unfamiliar place, than it does any inherent quality of Dean himself.

Because the key is, Dean isn't putting in any special effort in either scene. The way he approaches the couple is a contrast to how he usually handles cases. There's no costume, no subterfuge, and no alias. He isn't trying to fool either the couple in 1x11 or Marta in 14x13 into liking and trusting him. He's just being himself and telling the truth in both scenes (maybe not ALL the truth, but the essential basics). It works on Marta because she already knows and likes him. It doesn't work on the couple because he's a stranger to them.

So in 14x13 (and at other times in the show too) we see that Sam is not any better with people than Dean, especially when he makes no effort. He in fact gives off somewhat alarming vibes to strangers when he doesn't present with some kind of subterfuge that engenders immediate trust (i.e. being an FBI or insurance agent). (Think of Amelia's initial reaction to him in season 8 for example.) And this is true even for people who have almost certainly seen him around before, in the town he's lived in for over half a decade.

And the fact that he has made no effort to get to know his neighbors is telling in itself. Sam isn't any more automatically trustworthy to regular people than Dean unless he puts in specific effort to be. Costumes and aliases, fake credentials, even that specific face and voice he uses to talk to witnesses are all effort he has to put in. And that effort is not something that comes naturally to him or occurs to him outside of the context of a case. (I think we also see in season 6 exactly how much conscious effort those things require of him, given that without a soul he not only lacks personability but is downright impatient with and insulting to people.)

It's actually Dean who's good at building bonds, establishing casual report, and eliciting trust from people. And moreover, it's Dean who thinks to make the effort to do so. Sam is better at leading hunters specifically, but that's a whole different story and meta.

[ltbarnes]

‘Tis the Damn Season

Stark U #6

Summary: It’s Christmas Eve, you’re too drunk, you’ve basically avoided Bucky and Steve for six months and the last person you’d want to meet at this party just happens to be yelling in your face. The panic attack is inevitable, really.

Pairing: college!Steve Rogers x reader, college!Bucky Barnes x reader, college!Sam Wilson x reader, college!Natasha Romanoff x reader

Word count: 7.8k

Warnings: so much angst, past SA, alcohol, talk about violence, Christmas celebrations, things finally start to happen, kissing :)

A/N: Happy holidays to anyone who celebrates and to those who don’t, I hope you have a good few days anyways <3 This is the first I’ve posted since July which is awful of me so sorry

Series Masterlist

Main Masterlist

You didn't see them all summer. The day after your last exam was over, you bolted back to your hometown and spent the entire summer selectively ignoring messages from Bucky and Natasha and Steve and Sam asking what you were doing and how your summer was going and maybe you could all meet up and go somewhere and—

It's December now, and every goddamn day since June you have been trying to figure out if what Bucky said to you when you were sick was a fever-induced hallucination or if he really, actually, said that he wanted you to take his last name someday. It made you panic, because the entire spring term you tried to convince yourself that your feelings towards them were batshit crazy and any inkling to them feeling the same was a delusional reach, grasping for crumbs that in reality were just friendly gestures. And then he says that.

"She's just practicing her future last name, Stevie."

So, yeah...things have been weird. Three months have passed since classes started and none of you want to mention what happened right before summer break. Actually, with each day passing you feel more like maybe it was just a hallucination or a very vivid dream, because both Bucky and Steve act like it never even happened. Bucky even had his mouth latched onto some blonde sophomore at a dumb, stupid frat party on Halloween. You went home right after and cried for two hours. But it's not hard to conclude that even if there was some spark or connection or anything beyond friendship with either of them before summer, it has died out completely.

The subject will probably never be broached. You're too scared of confrontation and definitely too scared of revealing unreciprocated feelings for that to happen. The slightly tense atmosphere in the loft is entirely your fault—your lack of communication with anyone in the group during the summer has made them a little confused, you guess. You mostly spend time in your room, giving excuses of studying and talking with parents on the phone and 'I'm just tired, sorry'.

Spending too much time with Natasha scares you too, because she reads you so well and you don't want her to know how hurt and unhappily in love you are. She'll try to do something about it and then Steve and Bucky will catch on and then you will end up rejected and labeled as crazy, because who the fuck falls in love with two people?

That doesn't mean you've managed to avoid her. Living in the same apartment as her definitely makes that hard, but just the fact that she won't let you makes it impossible. Last week she even broke into your room when you had it locked, because apparently she knows how to pick a lock open in under ten seconds. She absolutely knows something is off, but so far she hasn't brought it up.

Natasha is the sole reason why you're now standing in the backyard of some rich kid's house just off campus, surrounded by smoke from cheap cigarettes and fairy lights hung up between the trees and one too many shots of vodka in your blood. It's December utterly and thoroughly—there's snow on the ground but people still haven't accepted the fact that wearing their short dresses and tank tops without jackets does not work anymore. Ice drops hangs from the tree where you stand, listening to Natasha talk with a drunken girl looking for her phone.

It's fun, sure. Not the worst party you've been to and not the best either. You talked to the girl you've been sitting next to in History class earlier for almost twenty minutes. Got free vodka. It's Friday and you don't have any exams to study for. None of that makes you forget that things aren't the same.

"Nat. Nat." You poke her shoulder repeatedly, obnoxiously probably, until she glances over her shoulder with a slight glare.

"What is it?"

"I'm gonna get 'nother drink. Inside," you tell her, pointing with your thumb towards a hedge even though it was meant to be the door. Natasha seems to understand anyway.

"Okay. Don't wander off too long. And come back here right after."

"Yes, ma'am." You give her a half-assed salute before turning around, swaying slightly in your step. It's the uneven and slippery surface of the snow-covered ground, you tell yourself.

There's a lot of people here, is what you note as you push yourself through the seemingly endless crowds of the living room. You kind of hate that they haven't played a single song you like and if Steve was here he would agree, because he doesn't listen to any music made after the internet was born. Bucky would then make fun of Steve and you would laugh and everything would be right in the world. Instead you're pressed to kitchen drawers of a dark kitchen, cheap vodka mixed with soda running down your throat.

The kitchen is crowded too, but either way it's a respite from whatever the hell's going on in the living room. Jumping up and down and calling it dancing (you were doing the same the hour before). You're too drunk to be miserable about everything happening in your life this entire term and much too drunk to feel the absolute atrocious taste of your drink.

In half an hour you will probably throw up and tomorrow will be spent nursing a horrible hangover, but those consequences seem insignificant right now. You just keep thinking about the image of Bucky shoving his tongue down someone's throat that wasn't yours. It was heartbreaking. That he's not here is a good thing, because you'd either witness the same thing again or actually bring it up to him, and that's much worse. God knows it's only a matter of time before Steve does the same thing.

Someone pushes into you, forcing the liquid from your cup to spill from the confines of the red plastic onto your dress. It's black, so it doesn't really matter, but the alcohol still seeps through the fabric until it reaches your skin.

"Shit, fuck—"

Your hand tries to somehow dry your dress by fanning the fabric, which obviously doesn't help very much, and the paper towels placed on the counter in front of you escape your drunken mind completely.

Fresh air and icy winter winds are the only options, so you push through and stumble into people on your way outside. It takes a lot longer than it should. You can't really see much considering the dizziness and darkness inside, but somehow, magically, you are eventually dragging your way towards Natasha who stands in the same place as before.

"Nat. Natty—I spilled. Look."

The black dress with the now wet patch is lifted towards her by your hands, highlighted for her to see. You sway as you tell her.

"Jesus, you can barely stand straight," Natasha answers with a stabling hand to your shoulder, shaking her head to herself instead of focusing on the very urgent fact that you spilled on yourself.

Natasha turns to the girl she's talking to, saying something you can't bother to decipher, before stepping aside with a guiding arm around you.

"We gotta get you home before you embarrass yourself for real," she mumbles underneath her breath.

"I heard that," you whisper, a loud hiccup following. Whoops.

She rolls her eyes, fishing her phone up from her pocket.

"Who—who you writing? To?" you ask, slightly aware that your sentences lack correct structure but not really caring. As long as the message comes across, right?

"I'm texting Steve. I can't drive and you sure as hell can't."

Even in your state, panic instantly sets in over the mention of his name even though you live in the same goddamn apartment.

"Nooo. No Steve."

Your hand grasps for her phone. Nat pulls it away from your reach much quicker than you can comprehend.

"Yes Steve. You're a mess and he's the only one with the patience to take care of this level of drunk. I don't care that you're avoiding them for some stupid goddamn reason," she tells you.

"Nat," you whine. "He can't see me. I spilled!"

She just glares at you. "I swear to god, Y/n...nobody cares that you spilled your drink. I can't even see it."

"I'm so drunk!"

"Yeah, I know. Just—just stay here, okay? I'm going to get you some water so you can sober up by the time your precious Steve comes for us."

Natasha is heading inside before you can process her words. Waiting in place for a few minutes turns into an eternity in your mind. She should know better than to leave you unattended and then expect you to stay—really, it's her own fault. You will accept no blame if Nat gets mad at you for going inside again. It's cold and you need to go to the bathroom. Also, you're mad at her. Telling Steve to come get you? That's just...embarrassing.

Once again you're shouldering your way past people on about the same level of intoxication as you. There's a bad remix of a Christmas song playing loudly. Makes you wanna punch whoever's phone is connected to the speaker. The bathroom is so, so far away. It's something the architect of this house should've thought of before he put it at the very end of this long hallway you're currently making your way through, but clearly he didn't have you in mind.

"Fuck! Watch where you're going, asshole," some girl seethes at you as your shoulder nudges against hers. A nudge is an exaggeration—you brushed against it at most. She's probably an aggressive drunk, that's all.

You don't answer, instead fumbling for the door handle to what you believe might be the bathroom. Some couple is making out in here, the girl with her ass planted on the edge of the bathtub and the guy nearly devouring her face. Doesn't look very pleasant, if you're honest.

"Out. I need to pee."

Your hands find their way to their shoulders, ushering the lovesick pair out of the room without much protest from either of them. They're still making out as they walk out.

Despite your less than sober state, you manage to remember to lock the door after they leave. Some of the mascara that previously inhabited your lashes has moved down to rest under your eyes. You rub it away, smudging it slightly, but it just makes you look a little more like one of those cool girls you always see on campus. It will do.

You kind of want to throw up, but decide against it. That hasn't happened since you were a freshman, and you'd like to keep it that way. Staring at yourself in the mirror occupies your time in the bathroom instead, swaying slightly with your hands placed on the cold sink. If Steve saw you now he would be so disappointed. At least you imagine he would be—that fatherly look on his face as he tells you how you need to be more mindful with your alcohol consumption. Did you even watch who poured your drink? Never go anywhere alone at a party. Especially not a frat one. You know better than this, Y/n.

Steve's imaginary voice is interrupted by someone banging on the door, shouting for you to hurry the fuck up. It's been over ten minutes, but to you it just feels like three, and Natasha has been looking for you ever since she returned to the garden with a glass of water in her hand and no one to give it to. It's not her banging on the door, unfortunately, but instead a dickhead guy who has no patience. Can't a girl spend some time alone in the bathroom doing nothing anymore?

The guy glares at you as you push the door open, stumbling out into the crowded hallway while paying him no mind. It's dark save for the red LED-lights plastered on the walls, making it feel like a seedy dive bar instead of a seedy house. You don't see much.

"Hey! Hey, you—the girl with the black dress!"

Someone pushes their way past the people talking and making out and leaning against the walls, shoving through them as he searches for your attention. Of course, you don't really think it's you he's after. Half of the people at this party are wearing black dresses.

A clammy hand finds purchase on your shoulder, halting you in your less than gracious steps and turning you around with ease. Head tilted back, gaze running upwards until they settle on the face of a quite attractive guy. He doesn't look pretty happy to see you. You're not very happy to see him either.

The blood drains from your face, stealing away all that alcohol-induced heat within a second as his curly hair and green eyes look down at you with that same contempt he had when Sam dragged him away from the kitchen almost a year ago. You had hoped you never had to see him again. It was a naive thing to wish for.

"Y/n, right?" he asks bitterly. You don't answer, but he takes your silence as a yes. It was probably a rhetorical question anyway. His slightly crooked nose was perfectly straight the last time you saw him. His face is committed to your memory, burned in to taunt you on sleepless nights and everytime an unknown man walks a little too closely when you're out alone. "Your little boyfriend broke my fucking nose. You know that?"

Another rhetorical question. Definitely more threatening. Might be the tight grip he has on your arm too. Either way, his mere presence has apparently stripped away your ability to breathe normally. It feels like you've been running to the point of nausea, dark spots dancing before your eyes as he shakes you in attempt to get an answer.

"You ruined my fucking reputation. For what? I barely touched you. Such a sensitive fucking bitch, going around telling everyone that..." His voice trails off, ushering you into a quiet corner when he realizes people are staring. "Got nothing to say now, huh? Been so good at running your fucking mouth before, haven't you?"

"Let me go," you whisper, voice wavering. You don't sound assertive at all, instead weak and fearful. It's what you feel, as an upbeat, slightly bad cover rendition of "All I Want For Christmas" booms through the house. Girls shrieking in excitement over in the living room reaches your ears. You would have joined them if you weren't currently cornered by the guy who assaulted you in your own kitchen a year ago.

"No, we're going to fucking talk. What the fuck were you doing, going around saying shit like that about me to everyone?"

"I...I didn't..." Your lips part between words, breathing out shakily, trying to articulate sentences long enough to make sense. Why can't you speak? Why can't you even think?

"You didn't what?" he seethes. "You're such a fucking bitch, you know that? Acts all innocent and hides behind her friends. My nose is fucking crooked forever because of that fuckhead you sent after me."

Is it the alcohol that renders you this goddamn useless? There's just tears springing to your eyes, unable to say anything in defense of yourself. Can't even walk away.

He pushes you against the wall, knocking the breath out of you. To other people it probably looks like you're hooking up. At least that's what you hope they think, because otherwise you want to wonder why no one is intervening.

"Joshua, please let me go," you tell him again, even more pathetic this time. You're crying now, curled in on yourself in attempt to make yourself as small as possible.

"Fuck, you're so—"

"She told you to let her go."

The assertive, familiar tone booms through the hallway. It doesn't really, can probably only be heard by the people around you, but it feels like it when Steve's tall figure pushes through with hasty steps towards where you and Joshua stand, followed by a glaring Bucky with his jaw clenched so fucking tightly. A sob of relief is drawn from your lips, muffled by the back of your hand.

Joshua steps back instantly. Kind of funny to think that he's so scared of those two, and sad to think that he only respects a 'no' when it comes from men.

"Nice nose job," Bucky speaks up, pointing at his own nose as he stares at Joshua's crooked one, courtesy of the damn good punch he managed to land with his left fist all those months ago.

"Fuck you," Joshua growls, taking a step forward in attempt to appear more threatening or something. He doesn't really succeed—both Bucky and Steve towers over him in both length and build, unrelenting in their stance. As if they're stone walls keeping out the enemy.

Steve rolls his his eyes, shaking his head with a sigh. "Just get out of here. Don't go near her ever again, you hear me? Bucky's glad to fix your nose otherwise. Break it right back. Can't promise the result will be very good, though."

Bucky stands slightly behind Steve, raising an eyebrow in Joshua's direction that tells him there's not even a trace of a lie in the blonde giant's statement.

"You—fuck this." Joshua throws his hands in the air, aiming the most distasteful glare over his shoulder in your direction, before pushing past Steve and Bucky with a shove.

Your body instantly deflates, the tension melting off your limbs as you close your eyes and lean back against the wall. Gentle, firm hands instantly reach your cheeks, your arms, searching for any trace Joshua might have left behind on your body.

"Hey, hey. Y/n, are you okay? Did he touch you? Sweetheart, look at me."

Bucky's voice draws you out of the anxious, panicked state you slipped into, fluttering your eyelids open to see his worried frown and an equally worried Steve looming behind him. Wet cheeks and red-rimmed eyes greet them, pupils dilated from the alcohol.

"Y/n, are you hurt? How long have you two been talking?" Steve adds, looming over you in such a way that his large frame blocks out any of the colorful lights plastered on the walls.

They already know you're drunk—Natasha was the one to call them here to get you, after all. Maybe your silence and obvious intoxication makes it clear to them after a couple of seconds that an answer from you is a few minutes away, a few miles of distance from this foggy, packed house. Nothing more is said or requested from you. Instead your trembling form is led away and out into the biting cold by gentle hands belonging to your friends. Even your slight shock can't shield you from freezing your ass off as soon as you get out into the fresh air again, teeth beginning to chatter within the second step on tightly packed snow.

"What the—where the hell have you been? I swear to god, Y/n, I was gone for two minutes! I've been looking for you everywhere!" an angry Natasha yells, running perfectly towards the three of you down the slippery lawn to where Steve is currently helping you into the backseat of his car.

"Nat," Steve says, giving her a pleading look that silently tells her it's not the time for a scolding.

"What? I told her to stay put when I went to get her a glass of water and she just disappeared out of nowhere. Slippery motherfucker while drunk, I swear she'll be the death of me—"

"Nat," he repeats, sternly this time. In that tone only he masters, silencing even the most eager tongues with a single exhale. "She met Joshua. And she's not okay. So please, leave your yelling for tomorrow and get in the car."

Steve holds the passenger door open, gesturing for the seat beside Bucky. He's turning the key, letting the car warm up properly while he clutches the wheel tightly. Natasha's irritated frown turns into a concerned one, nodding silently before slipping inside. Steve closes the door shut behind her.

You lean your head against the frost-covered window, fogged up by your breath two inches away from it, and close your eyes. Steve leans over you, reaching for the belt and fastens it over your torso. You forgot. He never does.

It's no surprise, doesn't startle you despite your absentminded state, when his warm hand cups your cheek, turns your head to face him. Soft, blue gaze and ridiculously long lashes. It's nothing but contrasting against the clouds released from your mouths with each breath—warm, concerned...loving? Maybe.

"Are you okay?" he whispers, thumb rubbing over your cheek.

You nod. "Yes. I am now."

Bucky puts his foot on the gas, turns on the blinker, and pulls away from the curb, out onto the streets. It's nearly soundless. The usual rumble from wheels against road is cushioned by the snow.

"This was a mistake. Sorry, I can't—" Sam gags, moving his head out of the bathroom before returning his presence within a few seconds. "You're a real shitty guard, Nat. Why'd you let her drink this much?"

All four of your roommates are gathered in the bathroom, surrounding you as if you're a newly born lion cub in a zoo, while you puke your guts out into the toilet. Steve is kneeling on the floor beside you, a comforting hand rubbing your back, while Bucky sits a few feet away with a glass of water in hand, ready for whenever you need it.

"Fuck you. You weren't there—she was like a goddamn ghost, just slipping away everytime I blinked. Looked fucking everywhere for her. 'S not my fault," Nat answers, residing on the floor of the shower in lack of space.

"Not true," you murmur in answer, your voice echoing off the ceramic surrounding you.

You're pretty much done throwing up, it's just the exhaustion following that's keeping you slumped over on the bathroom tile. Your hand stretches out in Bucky's direction, reaching for the glass of water that's gulped down within a few seconds.

"Careful. Gonna get sick again if you do it this fast," Bucky says, unable to help himself from brushing away the stray drops of water running down your chin.

The gesture is nothing new from him. He did it when you were sick all those months ago too, and you haven't forgotten it at all. His thumb gently rubbing over your skin as if you're precious, something deserving of gentleness, is engraved into your mind. You're thankful for getting most of the alcohol out of your system, because you might not have remembered this moment in the morning if not. Fuck it if you forgot the way his pupils widen just slightly, as if he didn't mean to, as if he couldn't help himself.

"I'm fine," you whisper in answer, clearing your throat. "Got it all out."

"Good." Steve's hand moves up from your back to your head, stroking it for just a second before withdrawing his touch. "Let's get you to the couch."

"I don't wanna go to the couch. Wanna be in my bed." You're pouting. Maybe there is some trace of alcohol left in you.

"Steve and Buck will feel much less like creepy stalkers if they stare at you sleeping on the couch instead of hovering around your bedroom all night like a bunch of pervs," Natasha speaks up. A snort follows after, as if it was a joke and not a statement. Definitely tipsy too, despite unwilling to admit such a weakness.

Steve raises a reprimanding eyebrow Natasha's way, telling her to shut her mouth with just his gaze. She smirks in answer.

"Don't listen to her. A fucking liar," Bucky remarks, but there's still some form of amusement in his expression. He can't even deny the statement—he is going to watch over you. Doesn't really matter if it's in the living room or in your bedroom. "Now let's get you up. C'mon."

With a push from your arms against the cold tile, you're standing on two legs again. Steve is hovering his hand near your back, ready to support if the vodka decides to topple you over. But you're fine—just tired now.

For ten minutes it feels things are back to normal again. On the living room couch, nestled in between them, your head leaning on Steve's shoulder as a stupid Hallmark Christmas movie plays on the tv. Sam and Natasha are in their rooms sleeping, and for a few moments you forget why you kept your distance. Everything would have been good if this is how the night would end. If Steve didn't have to address the past six months.

"I've missed this. With us," Steve whispers as he strokes your shoulder absentmindedly, like it's second nature to him to have his hands on your skin. "You've been so distant lately. For months, Y/n."

The room instantly becomes tense enough to make you nauseous. A clearing of your throat, an attempt to sit up out of Steve's hold and away from this conversation that you'd much rather avoid is futile—it's instantly stopped by Bucky's hand on your chest that pushes you right back.

"No," he says sternly. "You're gonna sit right here, sweetheart, and tell us why you've barely let us see you since fall term started. 'Cause it's sure as fuck not something I take lightly. Why have you avoided us?"

You look away, shaking your head to yourself as you try to talk yourself down. You will not break. You will not confess a single thing. You are going to act like everything is fine and you are not currently freaking out being sandwiched between the only two men you would gladly be sandwiched between under different circumstances than this.

"What are you even talking about?" you answer meekly. It's clear as soon as the words come out of your mouth that no one is falling for your innocent act, not even sweet, naive Steve. Then again, you're doing a particularly bad job. "Both of you think I've been distant?"

"Cut the bullshit, Y/n. If we've done something wrong, just say so." Bucky bites his cheek, glancing down for just a second, but it's enough to let his vulnerability slip. He's hurt.

A wave of guilt instantly washes over your body, an unusual feeling. During all these months of avoiding any interaction with Bucky and Steve besides the necessary ones, you didn't think that they'd actually mind your absence that much. They might not be hopelessly in love with you like you are with them, but they're still your friends. Friends miss each other.

"Or if it's something personal, you can tell us, you know? Is it anxiety, or are you feeling generally low, or...?" Steve chips in, trying to drown out Bucky's accusatory tone.

"No, no...I'm not depressed, Steve. And none of you have done anything wrong, I promise," you say hastily, shutting down their concerns as quickly as possible while trying to buy yourself time to come up with an excuse. "I just...needed some alone time."

Bucky rolls his eyes, shaking his head. Sassy man. "Bullshit again. You've spent a bunch of time with Natasha. Sam, too. It's us you're avoiding." He points to himself and Steve with his hand. "It's been almost six months, Y/n. What the hell's your problem?" He pushes himself off the couch, standing up and blocking your view of the tv. It's as if his frustration is all contained while sitting down.

"Bucky," Steve scolds, glaring up at his friend. He's not appreciating the tone at all, that's for sure.

"There's no problem, Bucky," you tell him, shaking your head. Trying to dismiss this entire conversation before you reveal too much.

"No! Y/n, I'm going fucking crazy! This is the first time you've even let me touch you in half a year!" Bucky yells, a pleading tone in his voice that breaks your heart just a little. Because it's true. You have barely even hugged since June. You've barely talked for more than five minutes at a time.

"Don't yell at her, for god's sake, Bucky," Steve adds, his hands on your shoulders and ready to get up from the couch any second.

"What the hell's going on with you, huh?!" Bucky continues, ignoring Steve's statement. His eyes are solely focused on you, void of the usual softness. There's just anger. "Cause if you can't stand us, then tough fucking luck. I can have your fucking things moved out by tomorrow for all I care. Can move right into Walker's dorm. Bet he'd accept you with open fucking arms if you get to your knees and—“

The drop of your heart down to your stomach can almost be heard, an echoing, hollow sound. You're sure of it. Bucky shuts his mouth, as if he realizes what exactly was about to come out of it. What is not even a second of silence feels like a whole minute, before Steve shoots up from his seat beside you and grabs Bucky by the collar, rattling the whole room with the force in which he nearly tackles Bucky against the wall with. The tangy taste of iron starts to fill your mouth, your teeth biting down on your lip hard enough to draw blood. There's tears lingering in your eyes but you can't hold them back, not anymore.

"You don't fucking talk to her like that, you bast—"

"I love you! It’s ‘cause I fucking love you guys!” you yell, a pathetic sob marring the words. “So I’m fucking sorry that I’ve avoided you two but I’m trying to get over these goddamn—these feelings, but I can’t, okay! I can’t!”

The bitter delivery is punctuated by the sleeve of your sweater wiping away the tears furiously, cutting Steve off and drawing both of their wild eyes towards your figure now standing up, just a minute away from a complete breakdown. You don't even process the fact that Steve cursed. It would've been teased about endlessly in any other situation.

"I will go. I'll leave if that's what you want," you seethe with a voice so unsteady that it's almost unbearable to listen to. "But I don’t hate any of you. I don’t, and I get why you’re mad. But fuck you, Bucky. Fuck you for saying that.”

More tears fall. It's futile to wipe them away when they'll be replaced the second after. You want to say more, hit Bucky where it hurts, but you cannot get the goddamn words to form on your lips. Opening your mouth and closing it again, shaking your head, comes before hastily walking towards your room and locking yourself inside without giving them a chance to answer.

As soon as the door is slammed shut, your hand comes up to your mouth to muffle the sobs. Sinking down to the floor as if you’re in a movie, forehead resting against your knees. The rate of your heartbeats could be considered dangerously high, but you just blurted out a whole love confession for two of your roommates in the midst of a fight. How the hell could everything turn to shit so quickly? Half an hour ago all of you were joking around in the bathroom, and now you're not sure you have the courage to face any of them again.

It's a rash, impulsive decision fueled by anger and betrayal and shame, but you rush over to your closet and pull out an overnight bag that's soon filled to the brim with enough things to last you a few days. You're crying the entire time.

When you pass the living room again, Bucky isn't there anymore. But Steve is. Barely a glance his way is spared, with hasty steps heading towards the hallway. You remind yourself of a furious toddler when you angrily put on your jacket, stick your feet into your winter boots. The bag is slung over your shoulder, hand resting on the door handle.

"Don't go. Y/n, please don't leave."

Steve stands at the other side of the hallway, a broken down expression on his pretty face.

"Bucky went out of line, but he didn't mean it, I swear. He's just too prideful to admit it," he continues. You shake your head, biting down on your bottom lip. "Please, honey. It’s Christmas Eve. It won’t be the same if you’re not here tomorrow.”

"I just need some space," you whisper, brushing away a stray tear with the sleeve of your jacket. You’re so embarrassed and hurt that you can barely look him in the eye. "I can't be in the same apartment as him right now."

Steve sighs, looking about ready to just throw you over his shoulder to get you to stay. But he won't do that. That's not Steve. So instead he glances down to the floor, shaking his head to himself.

“Did you mean it?” he asks softly. “The thing about—you said you loved us. Did you mean it?”

It takes a few seconds before you nod tentatively, sniffling and keeping your gaze on a spot past Steve. He doesn’t say anything.

Steve gathers courage enough to walk up to where you stand by the door, grabbing your cheeks with his hands, thumb running over the tear-stained skin gently. For a few moments, he just looks at you. Loud thoughts running amok in that perfect head of his.

“Nothing I say right now will do my feelings any justice, so I’m gonna save any big speeches for tomorrow. But just…stay. It’s 2 am, it’s freezing out and you’re still drunk. I don’t want you out there on the streets alone. I need you to stay, even if it’s only for your own safety. Don’t have to talk to any of us if you don’t want to.”

His words makes you nod automatically. All it took was his hands on your skin and the flicker of hope his words ignite in your chest, and you conceded within a second. No hesitation left in that exhausted body of yours. He‘s not saying outright that your feelings are requited, but it doesn’t feel like a rejection either. He doesn’t seem disgusted by your confession, by the knowledge that you’re in love with both him and his best friend.

“Good girl. Let’s just—let’s get you to bed, okay?”Steve tells you, squeezing your shoulder gently. With your confirmation in form of another silent nod, he nestles the bag out of your grip and takes off the jacket from your torso.

The bed feels so soft and warm and comforting when you lie down. Steve tucks you in. It’s achingly sweet and you don’t really deserve it after avoiding him and Bucky like that for so long, but he looks out for you nonetheless.

“Steve,” you whisper, drawing his gaze up to meet yours. “I’m sorry. For being so distant.”

He shakes his head. “You have nothing to be sorry for. You were scared,” Steve answers. “Don’t worry about anything, okay? Get some sleep. You’ve had a tough night, Y/n.”

The softest of smiles grazes your lips, puppy eyes gazing up at Steve. Your wonderful, caring, perfect Steve.

“Are you alright? It must’ve been hard meeting Joshua again. And what Bucky said, it…it was far from okay.”

“I will be,” you whisper.

He nods, observes your face for a few seconds. Leans down to press a kiss to your forehead—what kind of college guy even does that? And then he leaves the room, turning the light off behind him.

You’re woken up by a red headed, crazy woman sitting on top of you over the sheets, shaking your shoulders.

“Wake up, fuckhead. You’re gonna open the presents I got you,” Natasha urges, grinning down at you as you blink your eyes open, groaning.

“Fuckhead?” you ask, a tired chuckle from your lips as Natasha climbs off the bed.

“Yes. Don’t like it, huh?” she teases. “C’mon. The guys are already waiting.”

With slow steps and a loud yawn, the slightest trace of a hangover plaguing your body, you drag yourself out into the living room. Around the ugly, little tree that Sam insisted on cutting down from the campus gardens last week (he almost got arrested by the security guards) the three boys sit. Your gaze falls to the floor, scratching the skin right above your lip nervously, once Bucky looks up at you. Can’t really read his expression, but you figure you’ll lay the fight aside for the day. It’s Christmas, after all.

“Merry Christmas, sweetheart,” Steve says, urging you to sit down next to him right there on the carpet. You offer a soft smile, and an even softer ‘Merry Christmas’ back. You’re still unsure about yesterday. Despite there being no rejection from either of them, the uncertainty is kind of killing you. A pit of anxiety rests in your stomach, an uneasy feeling corrupting every cell as you sit down on the floor next to Steve.

Not even ten minutes later, the living room is drowning in a sea of wrapping paper. Natasha went overboard with the gift shopping this year, it seems like, but her absent father is also some kind of Russian oligarch or something so she tends to use up as much of his money as she can. You’re not complaining.

The special edition of The Hobbit, signed by the director of the movie, that you managed to get on eBay and cost you a fucking fortune is received with a whispered ‘thank you’ from Bucky. He holds it in his hands tightly, staring down at the book without a word, and you don’t know if he’s happy for it. Maybe he’s not happy with anything touched by you at this moment. He hasn’t gotten you a gift, it seems like, or maybe he threw it in the trash and burned it yesterday.

Steve got you three books that he’d heard you say you wanted months ago, and a dainty silver necklace with a bee pendant hanging from it. “You know, uh, I usually call you ‘honey’ and I thought it was a little funny, maybe. But I can exchange it if you don’t like it. It’s no problem,” he had said, even though there were tears of gratitude in your eyes. Your arms were thrown around him a second later, hugging him tightly as you thanked him profusely for the most thoughtful gift.

Now you’re leaning your back against the couch, still on the floor, watching as Sam and Natasha are tinkering with his new Nintendo Switch that he got from her (overboard with the gifts, as previously mentioned). He’s so happy it almost makes you zoned out as you watch his childlike excitement. It’s nice to see the two of them so calm and sweet with each other too. Usually bickering and getting on each other’s nerves all the time otherwise.

“Y/n, can we talk?”

Your head tilts back, looking up at Bucky standing nervously in front of you, his hand rubbing the back of his neck. There’s a deep hesitation within you, a pride that wants to say no and remain in your angry state forever without confrontation. But it’s Bucky. You hate this animosity between the two of you, the tension. Despite being pissed off and hurt and afraid that he doesn’t want you, you can’t say no, so you nod and push yourself up to a stand.

Bucky closes the door to his room behind him gently, clearing his throat and looking at anything but you. A sigh comes out of his mouth, shaking his head, before he parts his lips to speak.

“I’m so sorry, Y/n. What I said was disgusting and unforgivable and so fucking out of line. You didn’t deserve that at all. So out of proportion to what I was mad at you for,” Bucky says, running the palm of his calloused hand over his face.

“It was,” you answer honestly. There’s no use in denying that what Bucky said was stupidly hurtful. He nods, looking away from your gaze.

“It made me angry thinking that you ignored me, because at first I didn’t know what I had done, you know? And then I thought for a few months that me and Steve had been too overbearing and that you tried to keep your distance because you thought we were annoying or something. But that’s not the case. I should’ve known better by now than to think that you would do anything to purposely hurt us.”

You gulp, nodding, looking down to the floor. “I’m sorry too,” you whisper. “I didn’t know that you guys thought I had something against you until last night. Obviously, you…you know now that’s not the case,” you tell him, embracing yourself with your arms. “But last night, Bucky, I…you hurt me. I know you were angry, but saying those kind of things isn’t okay.”

“I know that. God, I know, Y/n. I’m so sorry. It was fucking childish of me, retorting to saying that Jo—“ Bucky shakes his head, hands coming up to tug at the roots of his hair. “And it felt stupid giving you that present in front of everyone, so now you think I didn’t get you anything, too, and—“

“You got me a present?”

“Yes. Of course I did, Y/n. But I saw how much Natasha had bought and that necklace Steve gave you and my gift felt stupid in comparison to that. Just didn’t want to give it to you in front of everyone,” he says, a little awkwardly. A little boy giving his mother a drawing he made in kindergarten, he reminds you of.

“Bucky…that doesn’t matter. I don’t care what you have gotten me. I’ll like it no matter what if it’s from you.”

He shifts in his place, contemplating something, before picking up a sweater on his bed, revealing a wrapped present hidden underneath. Bucky took the gift from the pile without anyone noticing before, throwing it into his room so no one would see.

With a tentative hand, he reaches it out to you. Doesn’t watch as you unwrap it, instead biting on his thumbnail. You reprimand him for it, and the hand returns to his side.

“Is it a book?” You run your fingers over the cover, a hardcover with nothing on it. Blank.

“It’s a photo album. Shit, it’s stupid. I don’t know,” Bucky answers, looking about ready to snatch it back, but you open the first page up before he has a chance to.

A picture of you, Natasha, Sam and Steve on the first page. It was taken last year in November. You’re all running after one of Sam’s model planes, fall leaves singling down from the sky. It’s a beautiful picture.

“4 grown idiots running after a kid’s toy - November 12th, 2022”

“It’s just pics I’ve taken with my phone, so it’s nothing artsy or anything, but…uhm.” Bucky runs his hand through his short, brown hair.

You flip the page. You’re looking out through the kitchen window, the sun shining through and casting shadows over the room and your figure curled up on the chair.

“Angel in the sun - March 25th, 2023”

A soft chuckle is drawn from your lips, resisting the urge to run your finger over the photo, but you don’t want to smudge the blank paper. On the same page there’s another picture of you with your arms around Natasha’s shoulders, nearly wrestling her to the ground with the force of your hug. You look so happy.

Bucky looks nervous as you glance up from the photo album at him. “Know it’s not much, but…yeah.”

A loud huff of hair escapes Bucky as you throw your arms around him. It takes a second or two for him to hug you back, but he soon has his chin resting on top of your head, arms around your waist.

“I love it,” you whisper, holding onto him tightly enough to constrict his breathing.

“You do? I can take it back if you don’t like it.”

Your grip around him releases, arms coming down to your sides so you can take a step back and look him in the eyes. “This is everything, Bucky,” you say softly, feeling a lump in your throat that can turn into tears any second. “The fact that you took the time to make this for me is just…it’s the most thoughtful thing ever. And these pictures are so beautiful, Bucky, and just the thought of you sitting down and glueing them onto the page and writing captions and—“

His lips against yours. Oh god. Oh my god, Bucky has his lips pressed against yours. Gentle hands hold your jaw, his head leaning down to compensate for the height difference, and Bucky Barnes is kissing you with urgency and desperation.

The shock is enough to make you unable to return the kiss. He seems to take your surprise as rejection despite the fact that you literally yelled ‘I love you’ in his face last night. Bucky steps away and takes his hands off your skin, running his hand over his mouth, shaking his head.

“I’m so sorry, don’t know what the hell came over me, I—“

On your tiptoes, fingers grabbing his sweatshirt to pull him closer, and you nearly smash your lips against his to shut up any of that doubt he carries. It’s not a graceful or very romantic kiss, but by the sound akin to a very mild growl that comes from Bucky and his hands sliding down to your waist to pull you closer, you guess he likes it anyway.

It doesn’t last more than 20 seconds. A harsh knock on the door to Bucky’s room interrupts it, forcing you part from his lips and get down from your tiptoes again.

“What the hell are you doing in there? C’mon! I’ve made goddamn Christmas brunch!” Sam yells, drawing a soft chuckle from your lips as your forehead meets Bucky’s chest.

With a soft smile, nothing said, you back away from Bucky. Slipping out of his room and leaving him there all flustered and semi-hard from a 20 second make-out session. The first ever between you, though. He thinks it’s pretty understandable.

As Bucky follows you into the kitchen, sitting down at the table by Steve, he leans towards his best friend and whispers into his ear low enough to make anyone else unable to hear.

“I kissed her, Stevie,” Bucky says with a shit eating grin on his face. “I finally fucking kissed her.”

The blond man turns his head enough to look over at Bucky, the red flush of his cheeks and ears enough to tell anyone what’s been said.

“Are you serious?” Steve asks.

“I kissed her and she kissed me back, I swear. I gave her that photo album I’ve worked on for weeks. She said she loved it, Steve.”

“I guess it’s my turn then, isn’t it?” Steve answers, a shy smile on his lips as the two of them watch you sit down opposite of them at the table, glancing through the window out at the heavy snowfall. Natasha puts a newly toasted bagel on your plate.

“Go get our girl, Stevie.”

[lingering-paperwork]

The off string anatomy post.... it's real....

Ok so the description of the figures is Way way longer than I thought it would be so I would like to apologize (I literally had to write it over the corse of two days) there's a lot of stuff missing from this example but I Hope you can forgive me, I was a little lazy and wanted to get the most important things out of the way. So now that I'm done rambling about my rambling, please enjoy, more rambling!

(Below cut is headcanons and rambling galore!)

Fig. 1 & Fig. 2: appear three separate times on the sheet. So let's talk about their eyes first. Iterator eyes are the same as overseer cameras (probably higher quality but they're so similar it's hard to tell). There's a layer of privacy glass over their eyes, meaning that you probably couldn't see their pupils dilating unless you removed the plexiglass. (Which happens a lot for models off string, see: blank slate). If their eyes are damaged it's easy to just rip apart an overseer and replace the eye, it surprisingly doesn't seem to hurt them when you remove it. At least, it doesn't hurt the mechanical models, organic models might feel just a tad more pain when it comes to eye removal. There has also been documents of disorders in individuals with generalized anxiety, schizophrenia, and tic disorders, where one of their pupils gets stuck dilated (or undilated). This can also be fixed by replacing the eye, but it is likely to happen over and over in the same eye. (No replacing eyes does not get rid of their hallucinations and other disorders)

Fig. 3: nothing important to add here--it's an artificial olfactory organ (Organ?). THE SMELL SLAB!!!

Fig. 4: THIS is the thing I'm most excited to talk about However I feel like Figures, 8, 9, and 10 will be a better time to explain it. So for now: it's the mouth of the iterator. I call it a "proboscis" because to me that's the word that fits best! It rests coiled up underneath the face plate until needed and connects to the rest of the digestive tract (which is not very accurately drawn in this image, unfortunately.)

Fig. 5: this is something that acts like an iterators nose (breathing wise). They cant breathe from their mouth so they have large holes in the sides of their necks that basically allows them to do so. Organic iterators have more breath capacity under water than mechanical ones do, since they have larger lungs and more space in their chest for air. Basically a mechanical iterator would be more susceptible to drowning (gasp). The reason they need separate places to eat and breathe is: it just works better, plus there's less of a choking hazzard. (Also it looks cool, and things need Oxygen to exist :3)

Fig. 6: so I'm not sure if there should be a brain or neurons here, but since this is an au where iterators are basically just "guy hooked up to largest pc" I feel like a regular brain would make more sense. And for modified off string iterators, they can have their brain cage stuffed with neurons (as a treat /j). (Side note: started writting this and called an iterator skull a 'Brain Cage' so now it's real and that's what it's called, fight me over it) Anyways, The Brain Cage (tm) does unironically help connecting their mechanic parts, like eyes, ears, antenna, ect. To their brains.

Fig. 7: audio inputs. Ears. Whatever you'd like to call them. I guess in here I'll put the speaker as well--iterators speakers are found on the front of their puppet, usually high up on their chest. It is in the drawing, but the organs were more important to me when I drew it so Sadly the speaker is hidden under their lungs. :']

Fig. 8: this is the process of an iterator getting ready to eat (yay!!) Their neck muscles move aside for the proboscis, to which they either 'take a bite' of the food, or just rip it apart with their hands and put in their mouth (which is the easier option for them). The proboscis itself is made of a tough rubber, which allows food to go down easier, and makes 'chewing' easier as well. The act of an iterator chewing is just them spinning around their proboscis violently before bringing it back under their face plate to swallow, like a garbage disposal. Probably sounds like one too...

Fig. 9 & 10: Figure 9 shows the inside of the proboscis, which is basically just a Large amount of teeth. they're usually covering every wall of the proboscis for a good feet or two, in a circular pattern, until they slowly fade into the esophagus. Figure 10 shows what the end of the proboscis looks like, which is basically just a small 'beak' used for bitting, when necessary. Because of the way they're built, if they eat something like crumbs or fish flakes, it can get stuck on their teeth or on the side of their esophagus. If they eat enough of it, it could cause a build up and cause a blockage. Blockages can be removed but it's uncomfortable and gross to do so. (This makes me wonder if iterators can vomit? I mean they probably Could but it definitely wouldn't be comfortable or safe.)

Figure 11 is both figures at the bottom, so I'm going to split it into: talking about the mechanical iterator puppets and the organic iterator puppets.

Fig. 11a: (left model) mechanical iterator puppets have a very difficult time off string. Their organs are tightly packed into their carapace, making it hard to breathe and digest large amounts of food. Speaking of food, they also have a harder time growing, which leads to lots of growing pains and headaches. They can also overheat quite easily, (which could literally boil their organs, depending on the color of their carapace and their model type), their cooling systems are horrible, since they just bring in air from the outside which is obviously not very effective on hot days. though older models have an easier chance since they don't have as many fans as newer generations do. (I also put patterns on there because I have a headcanon about those as well, mainly that robotic models have more on their face and organic models have more on the rest of their body.)

Fig. 11b: (right model) organic iterator puppets have a much easier time off string, though they are more susceptible to things like overstimulation. They're also just more fragile over all, getting grave injuries like broken bones and deep wounds is particularly common for them. Though they do have an easier time growing to adapt to their diet, furthermore their organs have more space and are less sandwiched together. They don't have Vents like robotic puppets do, but they regulate their temperatures almost the same way we do. They also have a thin layer of furr on the backs of their puppets, that grows in the winter and shortens in the summer. (I forgot to mention this but: every iterators organs and eye color is what their system color is, so while it might not realistically be as vibrant as in the drawing, it would still be their system colors.) (Homestuck ahh headcanon ik)

Right, now, I've mentioned a lot about how iterators 'grow according to their diet' so I'll discuss that now. Iterators are naturally omnivores, much like their parent species, so their body can fully digest both plants and animals. However, if an iterator were to eat more than the other, their bodies get more used to the one they eat more commonly, and might entirely lose the ability to digest the other. This leads to a lot of changes in their personality and, of course, their size.

If they maintain a vegetarian diet, they'll grow malnourished and scrawny, becoming something similar to Saint in terms of speed and weakness. Though they do get more 'attuned with the earth' and might start desiring ascension, or seeking out echos. If they maintain a carnivorous diet, they'll get taller and stronger, think gourmand/artificer in terms of strength. However this does lead to a never ending desire for flesh, and might lead to the iterator forgetting almost everything about themselves, more worried about their next meal than who their actually killing. Last but not least: if they eat their own kind, they'll turn into an insane cannibalistic murderer. it takes around 10 cycles of eating straight meat/veggies for the effects stated to take place but, they only have to eat one member of their kind to kinda lose it a little.

AND IM DONE thank you for your time, lord knows I'll retcon this in the future, I hope you have a Wonderful day. Adios!

[junesprince]

im sorry if someone has pointed these out already but i replayed p5t again and i am in absolute SHAMBLES with these new observations. i never actually post my thoughts here but i kinda need people to talk to about p5t IM AUTISTIC AND HYPERFIXATED. anyway onto the real post, sorry if this is unorganized and messy. im just really excited

i really wanna talk about the whole event that happens in the 3rd kingdom, on the rooftop.

soo.. when the school crashes and transforms.. it resembles a clock. a train station??? and. said clock is unmoving. what struck me is the time it was stuck on. 6:00pm, or 18:00, the exact time The Train Incident (tm) takes place, and the exact time eri was pushed onto the train tracks at the station.

i guess you could say, toshiro is stuck in the past, unable to move on and process his trauma. it's the extreme guilt of him losing his closest friend and how standing up and rebelling... just ended up in so many people hurt. he can't possibly live bearing the sin of that.

but here's when it gets more interesting... when shadow toshiro was threatening to kill erina, and when erina/eri inspired toshiro to take a stand, he throws joker's knife through the shadows hand, but more specifically, through the gloved hand, the one damaged from the train.

then with a really good sequence, toshiro runs as fast as he possibly can (i wonder how he did that actually) and with flashing memories of him failing to save eri in between, he manages to catch erina before she falls. and... he catches her with his damaged hand. the same hand that failed to save eri, saved erina.

remember the clock from the beginning? it STARTS MOVING AGAIN right after this.

this whole scene is genuinely such a beautiful and symbolistic way to show that toshiro finally found his resolve, and that despite all that trauma in the past, he's ready to change for the better and move again.

oh, and one more thing. toshiros mask only has one eye shown. the left one... the one that eri lost. they have ONE EYE EACH AAAAGHHH!! their souls really are connected.

what gets me more is that one of toshiros catchphrases in combat iirc is "witness OUR power as ONE" and it makes me go insane because he basically sees eri as his hero (here ill quote a futaba dialogue that hit me hard: "natsuhara's like the undefeated heroine in toshiro's life story, huh?") and she made him feel like he's more than just a puppet of his father. she inspired him to take a stand, and while this resulted badly, it led to his LITERAL SOUL subconsciously manifesting into a being heavily based on her (erina)

he just believes that eri/erina is a huge part of who he is. so "witness our power as one"

the fact he doesn't have a real PT outfit disappoints me a bit, but id like to think it's because eri taught him that he doesn't need to become all cool and change himself to rebel. he just needs to be himself. that's really it.

some extra things i have noticed:

-shadow toshiros 'weapon' is basically just bandages. i first thought this was a twisted more distorted version of the bandages eri gave toshiro when they first met (since shadow toshiro claims to despise eri)?? but someone in yt comments pointed out its probably made from eri's bandages after the incident. and i think that makes much more sense

-toshiro is the only persona user that has a persona opposite of his gender... that's kinda... 🏳️‍⚧️ if you ask me...heh (im trans)

-i know many know already but erinas character design is GENIUS . like ... the covered eye and the prosthetic leg?? referencing eri?? SO FUCKING WELL DONE. genuinely one of my fav character designs in persona

-not really an observation but remember the 'thank you instead of sorry' hideout talk where toshiro tells the gang about eri more?? when it was finished and toshiro said "natsuhara-senpai...um, thank you." IT TORE MY HEART STRINGS STOOOPPP

-idk im kinda unnormal about eritoshi. that's all

[moyokeansimblr]

Update

Not feeling so hot and I'm not going to do anything impulsive at 8PM on a Friday evening but

here is a link to a sfs folder with ALL of my content that's currently only hosted on patreon.

I want to add individual sfs links to the tumblr posts but that's a lot and I'm now regretting never adding alt dl links this whole time... and sorry I don't think the downloads in the sfs folder are in order... it also might be some other things, like fixed meshes or stuff. tbh I just added everything I've made after April 3rd 2023 since that was the last time I uploaded anything to sfs.

I guess while I'm here... I was going to wait until after I finish up the last of my active requests (probably by Monday, I'm almost done) but I desperately need a break from CC. I sent a group message on the 17th to my $4 and $6 patrons encouraging them to cancel, but I know not everybody knows patreon even has dms so maybe you'll see this post and I'll reach out again in the coming days so nobody is wasting their money. I am so immensely burnt out and I need to not create for a while. This is completely my own fault, nobody made me work on CC for 8-10 hours 5 days a week for the last several months and I fully knew it wasn't sustainable ages ago but I kept doing it because it made me feel good, until it didn't. Quite honestly, even before I sent the group message the instant wave of relief I felt just having made the decision to take a break... that caught me off guard but just confirmed I need this. I do feel really awful about it because I feel like I'm letting people down but at the same time I don't want to hate creating which was already happening. That being said, I don't know how long the lull in CC is going to be, and if you're only following me strictly for CC I apologize. As said I am still finishing up one request I still had, I'm about 75% done with that as of this post. But that's gonna be it for a while.

There is a part of me that wants to stop using patreon completely and unpublish my creator page (which is what I'm not going to impulsively do tonight without properly thinking it through...since there are positives like how easy it is to download files and whatnot) but I'd again encourage not only those who joined the $4 and $6 tiers but also the $2 tier to cancel so that you aren't wasting your money. If I did do this I would definitely do the individual sfs links on everything first. I'd not just leave you guys unable to download my stuff.

So, what does that mean for this blog? I'll spare ye, impatient readers, who have already read a lot because I ramble⬇️

Well, as of posting this I still have THREE HUNDRED AND TWENTY FOUR Strangetown posts in my queue. And I'm not tired of playing that.

I'm looking forward to having an opportunity to do all of the things I've been neglecting. I'm finally going to go through the subfolder within my downloads of everything I'm downloaded the last few months and decide if I wanna keep it in my game or not. And finish default replacing everything. And all my other various little projects I haven't been doing.

Also, I want to start playing Veronaville 😮I've already started downloading lots from kattaty to replace the in-game ones, and I found a cool replacement for the neighborhood map. I am leaning towards making a new sub-blog for this so that you don't have to try and follow Strangetown/LFT posts and Veronaville/ALT posts at the same time. I've only ever played the Veronaville sims for like one day as part of a super failed megahood years ago so I'd like to get to know them.

So basically, I guess I'm a gameplay blog for now? Until I want to create anything again anyways, but I don't know when that will be.

I don't know how to end this post... I'm sorry for the disappointment, but thank you so much for enjoying my stuff 💛💛

[lavenderr-starrs]

I’m sorry to my mutuals who are watching me like disappear for a week or a month and then reappear reblog stuff and post stuff from fandoms you’ve probably don’t even know about (A lot shit on my plate that’s been burning me out lmao! I’m fine though just been busy dw!! It’s nothing bad I promise even though it probably sounds like smth bad XD)

but I’m gonna make this post before I literally lose my marbles

It’s about twisted wonderland and Madoka magica so strap in fellas this is gonna be hella targeted to probably me and me alone and maybe like one other person

Anyways HEAVY AND I MEAN HEAVY SPOILERS FOR BOTH FRANCHISES and A REALLY LONG RAMBLE UNDER THE CUT LMAO

So don’t click keep reading if you havent finished or started either (ESPECIALLY MADOKA MAGICA, Trust me the show and movies are so good walking into blind I’d kill a man to watch it blindly again) also warning for potentially shit grammar incoming lol

First things first-

HOW HAVE I NOT SEEN SOMEONE NOTICE THE SIMILARITY BETWEEN OVERBLOTS AND WITCHES?

The similarities is the over-use of magic and negative energy polluting the energy source they use to performing these magical abilities turning them into abominations that go on a rampage and effecting the lives of those around them.

The difference though is that for witches, it’s specifically middle school girls who become witches and them becoming witches have the chances of causing world ending atrocities- and in the world of puella magi most Natural disasters are due to the fact a witch is the cause of those disasters and only incubators and other unsuspecting naive magical girl know of

Whereas in twisted wonderland *So far* we’ve only seen Teen high school boys overblot and that didn’t(Besides chapter 6 and 7) have any world ending consequences in my opinion

Says alot huh? XD

Anyways that’s a point I wanna get to another time

You know what I’d love to see? a reader-insert or just a yuu from puella magi in the world of twisted wonderland!

Now this is when I start getting real self-indulgent with this XD but I wanna see like a Homura!Yuu! :)

basically a reader-insert who takes the role of Homura Akemi, right?

And the entirety of the first anime happens and Madoka goes from a 14 year old girl who made a wish to save a cat from dying by unknowingly trading her soul to become a magical girl as an energy source to a higher being

to end up becoming an omnipotent concept that saves magical girls when their gems over pollute and are about to become witches

But instead of the Rebellion Arc happening and Homura!Yuu becoming a witch and demon and all that pizazz! let’s say they “try” to keep going and just Bans themselves from going back in time again and trying to go forward for Madokamis sake and deals with those weird wraith things in the new universe

and maybe a little cherry on top they try to learn and expand the magic abilities Yuus other magical girl friends had.

Later on we move to let’s say, 17 Year old Homura!Yuu, and guess what? You’ve been isekaid bestie have fun!

During the prologue introduction, when Homura!Yuu wakes up into the coffin grim doesn’t get a moment to even open the coffin as you just kick it open ready to transform believing this is some form of a witches labyrinth and are ready to jump into a bunch of conclusions

Now, in comes a poor unsuspecting Grimm

And the first thing Homura!Yuu does upon notice of him? The same thing Homura did to Bebe in rebellion-

just one Quick grasp onto his neck and just instantly slamming him into the nearest wall before he could even say a word. Questions being shot left and right over this potential Witch-like being or a being that seems to be similar combination of a witches Familiar+ Kyubey. A thought you do not like the sound of.

Grim is quite fairly, terrified out of his mind (I’m sorry my son) But! Lucky for him in comes the headmaster to witness this display of aggression! And school hasn’t even begun yet! The nerve!

Now this can go from here in Multiple ways, but for now, how id see it going is Crowley using his whip to tie up Homura!Yuu and just yoinks up a scared grim similar to what Mami did in rebellion

you’re only reaction to this is “Ah shit, here we go again.”

Now I can see Crowley ends up kicking Grim away still since you’ll obviously deny any association with him and just questions Crowley like there’s no tomorrow and just like in canon those questions fall on deaf ears! Lol

Crowley believes that coming to night raven college has frazzled your young hormonal teenage mind into acting so aggressive and since he’s such a kind and generous headmaster does not hold you accountable for it, isn’t he so wonderful c:

Homura!Yuu ends up quietly playing along to whatever the hell is going on to get a better and proper assessment on the situation you’ve been put in. So everything continues on as normal while the students of NRC give you a strange look until it’s finally your turn to approach the mirror.

How I’d see the mirror react to a Homura!Yuu is once you give it your name, I feel like he’d go “their soul is..Missing?..” Because as you know your soul has been turned into your soul gem and the mirror has no knowledge of this so you’re not gonna be assigned any dorm, sorry not sorry c:

This, understandable, freaks everybody out.

This is when Canon plays out a usual in the story for the prologue with the headmaster taking you to Ramshackle and you’re Re-encounter with Grim.

When you do encounter grim again you transform again and start to chase after him to continue where you left off back in the mirror chamber. This leads to Homura!Yuu discovering grim to be innocent in your arrival here and just simply… wants to be able to grow stronger.. hmm why do you feel like you’ve heard that before

Upon Grim proving his innocence and quite frankly become official scared of Homura!Yuu in comes the ghosts to scare him some more! They watch you chase him down and wanted to join in on the fun.

Mind you, you aka Homura!Yuu are still on guard and still transformed so you obviously attack the ghost with grim ending believing you attacked them for his protection! You didn’t, but if it makes up for scaring the piss outta him sure 👍 well go with that.

Now we continue with canon from here with Crowley calling you a beast tamer and hiring you as a janitor yadda yadda, but Grim ends up referring to you as his Bodyguard instead of henchman in this one! Which if Homura!Yuu was going to be honest, Grim was 1,000 percent a bigger improvement then kyubey.

I totally wanna make a side writing blog and make more stuff like this if it gathers the attention of others lol, I already have it made I just need to edit it along with my other side account where I used to post art until I took them down due to tumblrs Ai update lol

Once I’m done fixing up those two I’ll make a master post with the users of all three of my blogs and my ao3 too lol

Anyways thanks for reading my weird ass ramble :) I have so many ideas I wanna talk about for this and so many story scenarios that probably no one’s gonna be interested in XDD

[arcanaix]

Goner Ralsei

I probably should've posted these earlier.

These are the Sprites I share the most, possibly the ones I'm most known for. I came up with Goner Ralsei on a whim back in December, and it has de facto represented me online since. If you're wondering about the lore behind them, I have had its lore in my head for months now, but I've never typed it out and posted it publicly. I going to do that now.

EDIT: In my original version of this, I referred to Goner Ralsei with he/him pronouns. However, I have decided to refer to them with they/it pronouns from now on and have edited this according. I tried to find and change every instance, but I may have missed some. If you find anyone referring to them with they/it, don't get mad. Just explain to them that Goner Ralsei canonically goes by they/it.

I wanna say that if you want to use and of these designs but want to ignore the lore I made and just make up your own, that's perfectly fine.

I have always said that this is what Ralsei looks like at the end of Chapter 6 and through a good part of Chapter 7. At the end of Chapter 6, Ralsei no longer has a soul, hence that hole in its chest. That is true. However, I never mentioned two things: Ralsei willingly gave up the soul it had, and the soul it had up to that point (i.e. throughout chapters 1-6) wasn't its own.

While the above is the design I use most often, it's not their only.

This is "Goner Darksei." (that was meant to be a placeholder name, but I never got around to replacing it) Lore-wise, this is what Ralsei looked like before Chapter 1. Basically, Ralsei is a Goner and part of the lore of this is that Goners are a kind of Darkner or some kind of Lightner/Darkner hybrid (I still haven't decided yet) and also that they don't naturally have souls. Anyway, either before or during the intro to Chapter 1, Ralsei was given a soul. They transformed into the form they currently has.

If you're familiar with @lynxgriffin's idea of what Ralsei's deal is, you can probably see where this is going, since I kind of stole theirs for this.

Ralsei was given Kris's Soul and its appearance shifted according to Kris's insecurities. This is only about Ralsei's appearance, by the way, not its personality. Under this idea, Ralsei's personality is its own and not based on Kris's insecurities. Presumably, if someone else had their soul put in Ralsei (e.g. Susie), his appearance would be different.

"Goner Darksei" is essentially its default state, what it looks like without a soul. After giving Kris their soul back at the end of Chapter 6, Ralsei slowly turns back into its default state throughout Chapter 7.

This is "Ralsei Regression," as I call it. As I said, throughout Chapter 7, Ralsei regresses back to his default state. You may notice that the hole in their chest goes away.

If you're wondering why the reverse doesn't happen in Chapter 1, I have two explanations I'm not particularly confident in. One, the reverse did happen, and the hat covered it. Two, transforming from a default state into its current state is faster than the reverse and happened before Kris and Susie met it.

You may notice that Goner Darksei's leg movements are different. By which I mean you won't notice because literally no one did when I finalized Goner Ralsei's design last month and did that same thing. Basically, throughout Chapter 7, he is low on energy on account of no longer having a Soul. I believe Kris moves the way they do during the endings of chapters 1 and 2 for the same reason. Ralsei doesn't naturally have a soul, so it moves slightly faster than Kris, but going back to not having one after about a week of having one is a draining experience, hence why they still moves slowly.

While I'm here, here's an animation I made showing Ralsei regressing. This isn't how the process would actually work, but it looks cool, in my opinion.

Another idea I had for this is that Kris's Dark World appearance also changes at the end of Chapter 6, with their skin and hair looking more like their Light World appearance. I did make sprites for those, called "Restored Kris," which you can see here:

Anyway, here's some art that my friend Cerise (@ceriisu on Twitter, follow her, she's amazing) made of Goner Ralsei!

Original Scale

[iceheap]

plssssss more aarmau / aaron head canons i will eat em UP

Hmmm I have one I thought up a few months ago but it might be a bit meta.

So basically you know how Aaron doesn't have a personality at all in both nystreet and MCD? I think it's pretty obvious that the fact he has no defining characteristics or traits besides being a former lord and him hating Zane is obviously the fault of Jess and Jason, not Aaron's. But I do think this is interesting from a limitation perspective.

See, I don't like completely rebooting a story concept, I like to work with the limitations of the original source material to create depth, not something brand new. I've been doing the same for Zane as well, though we can talk about-face him another time. I like to use the peices that are already there in a story and add everything else around it. Sure, I will do canon divergences here and there, but if I can use something in the original canon and keep certain events as close as possible, I will.

So, Aaron's severe lack of personality. It's obviously because of bad writing. But what if it wasn't?

Shad is a very interesting character. Mostly because we don't get the exact details of WHY, exactly, he turned out so... Twisted.

Like as a creature itself, Shad is weird. He used to be a good person. I genuinely believe that Shad was never evil, just assigned a set of abilities he couldn't really handle. He kind of reminds me of Chat Noir because of the way he and Irene's magical dynamics are so similar to Marinette and Adrian's. Irene was the light, and Shad was the darkness.

Now, sure, we have the absolute shit-show that was MCD season 3 and Mystreet season 6, and the ensuing retcon that has Irene kind of be a terrible person? Which, I have a headcanon about that retconed version of the story that I might write and post on AO3 one day, but for the sake of my sanity I consider the original story of Shad's betrayal canon. The other male members were in love with Irene and stabbed Shad in the back.

Thinking about it, though, where was Irene in all of this?

What, exactly, made Shad into the Shadow Lord? Irene would have reasonex with him. If Shad had come out of the altercation alive, he could have been reasoned with. Yes, maybe Irene's communications skills were lacking due to centuries of immortality and maybe she caused a misunderstanding that led him to the dark side, but Shad was not a BAD person. Temperamental, traumatized, tired and emotionally disregulated, sure. But he was not a bad person.

That's if we're assuming Shad lived.

I think he didn't.

I think the other male divine warriors killed him.

Of course, Irene would not have been okay with this. And they probably would have had to do it behind her back. Maybe they chose a time they knew she would not be there. Maybe they told Shad Irene agreed with their plans for his death.

But Irene loved Shad. She maybe didn't know how to show it anymore, but she LOVED him. She would have never let him die.

Shad probably didn't know that though.

So he dies. And somehow, Irene finds them. The others try to explain, at first, but it's moot point because for the first time in multiple lifetimes, Irene emotes. She shows an emotion. She feels something.

She tries to heal Shad. She's a healer after all. It's what she does. She tries.

It doesn't work.

She tries again.

It doesn't work.

She tries and she tries and she tries and she tries and--

And Shad comes back.

But it's not right. There's something WRONG. Irene fucked up. Because Shad is dark, and Irene is light, and they're not supposed to MIX.

So Shad comes back as an angry, furious, broken shell, twisted and dark and evil and angry. And they fight him and they win, and Irene locks him away, and the Irene looks around at what her companions have TAKEN from her and she can't STAND it anymore and so she locks herself away and sleeps, because she doesn't feel ANYTHING and she wants to FEEL and--

Anyway, we know this story. So what does this have to do with Aaron?

What if Aaron isn't Shad? What if Aaron is a PEICE of Shad?

Because light and dark aren't supposed to mix, but when they do, they create something unstable. And like any chemical bond that does not want to exist, it explodes. And what did it explode?

Shad.

And what part of Shad did it explode?

His soul, of course.

The heart of darkness. The Shadow Lord. These are PEICES of Shad's soul. He was fractured.

And that's why Aaron has no personality besides things like revenge and being a lord and helping raise Lilith and loving Aphmau and nothing else. He was the peice of Shad that carried Shad's humanity, but NOTHING ELSE. He doesn't have the Shadow Lords Passion and anger and rage. He shows glimpses of it, but only enough any other human would show. That's why he's blank and distant and doesn't emote. His heart is gone, and with it, all the deeper complexities of emotion.

He has no hobbies or interests. He just fights and eats and sleeps and drinks water and functions from a creatures instinct, because he's human, but he has NOTHING ELSE.

He's also probably the only peice out toghether enough to reincarnated. But he's missing things and that's why he's so bleh.

Anyway, yeah, that's my hc for Aaron's lack of character development. And I think it's super interesting that Irene would have fractured Shad without realizing it. She was probably too desperate to bring him back to realize how much damage she was doing.

So yeah! Aaron is a peice of a whole and that's why he's WEIRD AF thank you for coming to my TedTalk WOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

[ominousnya]

If you enjoyed/are enjoying Baldur's Gate 3 I beg you to try out Pathfinder: Wrath of the Righteous. This is a long post about why.

The scope is huge, the companions are wonderful, and the dungeon delving is fun. There are some really impressive set pieces even given its more limited presentation.

Did I mention the companions are wonderful? Pathfinder still uses the alignment system 5E has since ditched, but I was impressed with how well it made "Evil" characters still work as comrades or love interests even if you're playing a purely "Good" protagonist. Alignment is a simple system, but these people are complicated.

I love that they form friendships outside of the player and interact with each other in skits and during conversations. I like that there are some pretty wild swings their arcs can take depending on your encouragement down one path or another, even if I will never be able to make some of the Evil choices myself.

A few warnings:

-Pathfinder is a significantly more complicated, crunchy system than 5E. It can be pretty intimidating making a character and leveling up. Don't be afraid to use a guide, and definitely don't be ashamed of using a lower difficulty.

-There are straight, gay, and bisexual party members, so not everyone is available to the protagonist depending on your character creation choices. If you don't want to be disappointed, look it up beforehand.

-You cannot date Woljif without a mod. I'm sorry. I was disappointed, too, until I met Daeran, the perfect man, my beloved horrible beast.

-There is a game within a game mechanic that starts after the first act. It is basically a limited version of the game Heroes of Might and Magic jammed into this game. I like it, some probably will hate it.

-Companions can be respecced, but they're forced into their default class for at least one level.

A few mechanical things WOTR does strictly better:

-Controller support is less prone to bugs, and almost all items in the world are either in boxes or on corpses rather than scattered about individually. It's much more manageable and comfortable if you're stuck using controller like what I am.

-You can loot all of the corpses in an area at the same time, and it prompts you when you leave a zone to loot any significant drops you may have left behind.

-Your companions' skills can be used for skill checks in dialogue and out in the world. If someone has a higher Lore (Religion) skill than you, the game uses theirs instead of yours to determine what dialogue choices are available.

-It auto selects the character with the highest lockpicking/disarming skill when you choose to go after a chest or door or trap that needs it.

-The greater complexity of Pathfinder means you also get a lot more options for character class and progression. Build diversity is high.

-Party size is 6, so you've got some flexibility to bring along the folks you like rather than having to worry as much about filling specific roles.

-Two battle systems are available: Real Time With Pause (think ye olde Baldur's Gates) and Turn Based. I do NOT like RTWP, so I stick to Turn Based, but if you like that one, enjoy.

There's probably more but this post is long already. Anyways, if you want more CRPG after your BG3 adventures are over, give it a go. It's good! I love it! It's extremely long so WATCH OUT!

[carpentergirl]

A Few More Minutes

Sam and Tara get trapped by Ghostface... Probably not the best time for Tara to have an Asthma Attack.

Author’s notes: I was inspired by @autism-swagger post about Tara’s asthma in scream 6 kinda outlined this.

This is my first time writing so idk if its anything people will like so good luck ig.

I probably dragged this out too much.

Just Sam and Tara being well Sam and Tara. 

Word count: 3871

: )

Sam and Tara had left their apartment rather early in the morning. More like Sam had a plan to get out of the house before Tara woke up. But in usual Samantha Carpenter style things never went as planned and Tara was miraculously up already and Sam acquired her presence anyway.

She didn’t mind her company of course, she just didn’t want to pull Tara down the path she was heading. But Tara being well- Tara would not take no for an answer and rushed to get ready.

Moving to New York was not the fresh start Sam had hoped it would be, Rather her reputation or persevered reputation preceded her to the big city where everyone had their opinions. Some were sympathetic to the young woman who had tragically been caught up in a legacy bestowed upon by her estranged father who died before she was even born. While others believed that Sam was Billy reincarnated and was meant to finish what he had started all those years ago, much believing in the story that Richie and Amber had tried to create.

Sam knew little to nothing about her father besides of course the conspiracy and movies about him. That wasn’t enough for her. Of course she didn't set out to miraculously find out he was a great guy and was just misunderstood as most cliche villains would be- she knew that wasn’t the truth. Her father was no villain, he was true evil but despite that and even if she hated to admit it- he was still a prominent part of her and she was desperate for some identity outside of ghostface.

Tara during the transition was- well, again, Tara. She didn’t say much about moving. She didn’t say much about anything as a matter of fact. She was just happy to once again be with her sister. After basically fending for herself ever since Sam left she was having a hard time adjusting to having a helicopter parent. She would never admit it but having Sam be there for her, especially when she didn’t want her to be, was something she could never find the words to thank her for. Tara didn’t deal too much with her past in the new city. She didn’t want to live in the past. It was too painful to remember the town of Woodborough. Everything she had gone through and all before the ghostface attacks. She’d rather forget it all. Some people were curious but rarely cruel, or maybe she never gave them the chance to be, Tara avoided people like the plague. The only time you would find Tara in any social situation is if she was about 3 shots too gone which is what led to Sam’s alleged stalking.

But at the end of the day Tara would always be with Sam, as long as Sam would have her of course.

Even with that being said Tara found it extremely difficult to be blindly led by her older sister into a psycho’s lair. Yes, Tara knew she asked for this when she volunteered herself as Sam’s companion for the day and yes Tara could at any point leave and go back to the safety of their apartment but she’s made it this far right?

“I don’t know, maybe we should go back home?” Tara sheepishly suggested her feet planted firmly on the sidewalk outside the abandoned movie theater. She knew why they were there, she knew Sam wanted answers, she just wished the answers didn't have to be so creepy.

“T, I told you not to come, I’ll call Kirby to come and get-” “No. You’re not going alone.” The girls bantered walking up to the entrance.

The lair was exactly the same as the first time they were there. When Gale had brought them looking for insight on who the newest masked freaks were. To no avail, it was just a ganky collection of Ghostface memorable. Pieces from the killers and victims. An unsettling tomb of whatever screwed up legacy Billy had started.

Tara knew Sam had been itching to come back, alone, she saw the way Sam gawked at her father’s robe, the knife he had used to murder people. She saw Sam’s need for answers and Tara knew she didn’t understand and she knew couldn’t understand which is why she didn’t want to get in between Sam and the answers she was looking for.

They crept their way through the shrine and Tara started to get uneasy. Everything about this gave her the untimely shiver of impending doom. It was almost as if every step brought her closer to the end of her being. She slid her hands over the display cases filled with bloody artifacts to some infamous murders and innocent victims, who, just as herself, had been brutally attacked. She was surprised that nothing of hers ended up behind the glass walls to be shown off like a trophy.

At the head of the room were the costumes, the same ones that made Tara shutter at the sight of even if it was nothing more than a costume at a party. Her eyes fell on Amber’s. Someone who had not crossed the oh so complicated mind of Tara Carpenter in a long time. A weighted rope had wrapped itself tightly around Tara’s heart and given into gravity. She didn’t want to think about Amber, the worst part of Woodsborough.

She noticed Sam in the center once again examining her father’s robe, she just couldn’t understand any of this, and quite frankly she didn't want to. It was becoming all too much for Tara.

“Sam, I don't feel well.” she said taking two puffs of her rescue inhaler, cursing herself for not using her orange one earlier in the morning, the one that prevented asthma attacks.

“Okay, Just a few more minutes and we'll get out of here.” Sam said concern glistening in her eyes but she was too close to turn around now- surly tara would be fine if they stuck around for a few minutes more.

Tara nodded, agreeing that a few more minutes wouldn’t kill her, she walked around the theater trying to find more theatrical attributes rather than the homicidal ones she was far too familiar with. She wandered past the wretched museum into the old concessions rooms looking at the abandoned candy trying to pinpoint a possible year of extinction for the theater.

She ran her fingers through the dust again causing her to cough again. Tara should’ve known better than to be stirring up dust when she was already at a  disadvantage for the day.

The youngest Carpenter had been looking at an old movie’s reel, trying to make sense of the little pictures in the frame holding them up to the light. She heard something behind her fall and she jumped to attention slowly turning around. To see absolutely nothing.

I'm losing my mind. Tara thought to herself, after all the shit she’s been through, she thinks it finally got to her.

And got to her it indeed did. The next time Tara heard a suspicious noise she once again contributed it to her new found psychosis and hallucinations. Until it was no longer a hallucination she could write off but instead a menacing Ghostface who had grabbed her from behind.

Tara let out an ungodly scream before laying a blow to the reaper’s stomach with her elbow and kicking at their knee. In which she was freed enough to take a running start and right into Sam’s arms.

The two  Carpenter sisters now found themselves one again being chased down by a robed figure. They raced to navigate the halls of the abandoned movie theater trying to escape.

Tara was not faring well to begin with and definitely not now with this whole running situation. She miserably tried to keep up with Sam running- stumbling was more like it. Her breathing was unsteady, panic glistened over her as she tried to keep up. While they had only been running a few minutes her anxiety coming face to face with a reaper once again was an accelerant for disaster and was taking a toll on her.

“Sam” the younger sister gasped, reaching out for the taller girl “I-”  Tara coughed.

Sam turned to the smaller girl chopping her step, Tara was hunched down at the waist, hands on her knees as she tried to stabilize her breathing.

This was all her own fault Tara thought to herself, if she wasn’t so instant on going then she would’ve remembered her inhaler this morning. Then again if she hadn’t been there then Sam would’ve been with Ghostface alone and without warning.

Everything burned. Her lips were dry and her mouth felt chalky, usually meaning it was time for an inhaler dose and possibly even something stronger. Her throat was on fire as if it was trying to burn a way to breathe for her. Sam grabbed her wrist pulling the girl with her as she heard the clatter of Ghost Face getting closer to them.

The next time the girls came to a stop was about 20 seconds later when Sam felt the tug of Tara hitting the ground, before she had only felt the staggering of the smaller girl which was enough for her to keep Tara in tow.

“Tara!” Sam yelled for her attention as the youngest carpenter grasped at her chest in a desperate attempt to let air in.

“T, calm down. You gotta try to calm down.” Sam rubbed circles into the girl's back while trying to pull her back up and failing Tara’s legs struggling to support her.

“You can’t out run me forever” Tara’s eyes found her sister’s, filled with tears and pure fear across her face. For the first time Sam was really forced to take in her appearance. Her lips tinted white with sweaty glistening skin over the color she had lost making her look ghostly.

Sam tugged Tara up yet again, this time taking the little breath she had left. She had to do something, there was no way Sam would let GhostFace get to Tara. Forcing the smaller girl to her feet and starting running once again, as fast as she possibly could she was basically dragging the girl who could only be heard by the rapsiness of her gasps. Then she spotted it, the storage room in which she had earlier caught Chad and Tara in successfully cockblocking them… again. She basically threw the younger girl in the room and barricaded the door with a shelving unit. Surveying it for anything useful as a means for defense with no luck.

Tara’s face had taken on an unnatural tone. She choked on her coughs. No matter how hard she tried she simply could not get air in. It seemed impossible.

Her mind was panicked. She could not go out like this. So miserably choking on her own inability to properly breathe. She could not die running from the fool who thought it was a good idea to dress up as her ex girlfriend, her sister’s father, a complete psycho.

She did not survive Amber’s attack to die like this. She did make this far to die because she couldn’t remember one day’s dose of medication. She couldn’t die. She wasn’t ready.

“Your inhaler” Sam questioned as Tara hadn’t already thought of that. Sam patted her pockets and then checked  the younger girl’s she knew Tara just had. She watched her put it in her pocket. She never left her house without it. And the extra one was in Sam’s backpack- of course the one she had tossed at the sound of Tara encountering Ghostface. Sam’s face dropped as she realized the inhaler simply wasn’t there, she grabbed her phone to use as a flashlight hoping it had just fallen out when she pushed the younger girl in. No such luck.

The stutter in Tara’s chest caught Sam’s attention again. Making her give up hope on the inhaler and resort to an escape plan. She pulled out her phone once again and found the previous texting chat.

Core Four

Sam: Trapped in the theater, Ghostface has us pinned in the storage closet.

Chad: We’re two blocks away, Mindy is on the phone with 911

Sam: Tara is bad- Asthma Attack- please hurry

Sam breathed a few moments of relief before the shuddering of her sister demanded her attention.

“Okay Tara, hold on a few more minutes.” Sam cooed, pulling her in close.

Sam could hear Ghostface clattering around in the halls looking for his next victims.

“Tara, Tara, Tara..” The voice menaced.

“Making me pick up after you, did your mother not teach you to pick up after yourself- oh right.” Tara was barely able to keep the focus on anything but her desperate need for air. She barely even processed what the menace was taunting her for.

Sam tried to keep Tara calm as the threats got louder.

“Well, at least I know you won’t get very far.” He threatened. Almost as if on cue Tara had let out a violent cough causing her body to shake. Sam quickly covered her mouth in an attempt to stifle the sound and not give away their location.

Tara was fading in and out; she could only see the outlines of the things around her, and her ears started to ring on top of the pounding of her heart instead of processing the sounds around her. SHe felt the strong arms around her body and the hands covering her mouth. She needed air and these hands in her way were not productive.

Sam cringed at her primal impulse to pull her arms away from her face.

The innate instinct to protect her airway.

Sam only held her tighter stiffening up against the wall.

“I’m sorry, I’m so so sorry.” Sam kept whispering in her sister’s ear as she clawed at her. She felt Tara’s heart on her forearm, beating so hard it threatened to burst out of her chest and the way Tara’s breaths were pulling on her palms erratically and the exhaled air making them feel sweaty.

All Sam could do was cry.

She never wanted to hurt Tara, She wanted nothing more than to let her go and comfort her, but she knew if she did that they’d be moments from discovery and they were at a disadvantage.

I’m so sorry was all she could say before it was a blubbering mess.

A few more seconds had passed Tara weakly pried and then dropped her arms to her sides. Her head dropped back into Sam’s shoulders and Sam felt the smaller girl’s weight fall into her. She slowly slid down the wall now sitting with Tara hoisted up between her legs. Slowly moving her hands away from Tara’s face and pulled her in closer, putting her head to her chest- hoping she would still hear her heart. Which she did. She noticed her blood-tinged lips and Sam’s hands. She sobbed as Tara continued to take uneven breaths and let out quiet gasps.

“I’m so sorry baby girl.” The guilt ate at her. It was a normal occurrence for Sam- knowing that all of this had happened because of her, if she had never found that diary, if she had never confronted her mom, if she never mentioned her real father then Tara would not be suffering the way she was.

They wouldn’t be stuck in a supply closet of a freak’s shrine of psychos.

“Oh Samantha, you thought you could hide from me.” Ghostface teased and was extremely close to the sound of it. Oh how badly she needed the others right now, there was no way to get out, and no way to protect Tara.

She heard the crunch of plastic outside the door “Oops” Ghostface muttered undoubtedly crushing the younger girl’s inhaler that he had discovered earlier. Sam slowly slid out from under Tara gently lowering her to the ground. She grabbed the rod she had found in the room earlier, it wasn’t much of anything, mostly likely a discarded mop or broomstick. But it was a last-ditch effort for Sam to defend herself. She positioned herself on the other side of the door waiting for the menace to step in.

She heard the doorknob jingle. Still blocked by the shelves.

Sam was panicking. Her ears started ringing and all she could do was prepare herself for yet another dance with the devil. She tried to remain focused on the now pushing door; it wasn't until the shelf was knocked over that Sam was zoned in and swung her “weapon”.

“Woah,” he said, catching the rod before it made contact with him.

“This is- um Inventive,” he said finally entering the room. Sweaty.

“Chad?” Sam questioned coming down from the adrenaline that had instinctively been released in her system.

She rushed over to Tara.

“Is he gone?” She questions pulling Tara���s limp body up from the ground and struggling to support her.

“I think so.” Chad said, quick to help Sam pick Tara up.

He reached for his pocket uncovering an orange inhaler. Which Tara clearly hadn’t used this morning if Chad had it. She looked down and saw the blue one crushed to pieces in the hall and shook her head.

“It’s too late for that- we have to get her to a hospital.” Sam rushed him out the door. Mindy came running up to them.

“There’s no one here” She huffed out trying to catch her breath and for the first time Sam had heard the sirens all around the building. The police must’ve scared them off so she tried to rationalize.

Chad carried Tara bridal style out of the building and straight to the stretcher. Tara was ghostly white and her lips started to tint blue. Chad shuddered at how lifeless she felt in his arms.

Sam dodged the police and reporters who had gathered around asking her what had happened.

She hopped into the ambulance as the paramedics worked on his sister urgently.

Sam sat impatiently in the waiting room of the ER. Chad and Mindy there, somehow Kirby and Gale also made it there. Honestly it was all a haze to Sam.

“Tara Carpenter.” The Doctor called out to the room of eagerly waiting family members, Sam was up in an instant.

“I'm her sister.” She begged the Doctor for him to say that Tara was okay.

“Tara went into respiratory distress earlier, as a result of her asthma, luckily we don’t believe she suffered any permanent damage to her brain and she shouldn’t have any long lasting effects but we definitely want to keep her overnight to be sure. Just a few more minutes and we could’ve been having a very different conversation.” The doctor explained. A wave of relief washed over the group. This wasn’t Tara’s first close call but it was definitely the closest in a long time.

“But the blood” Sam mentioned to the doctor, as she raised her hands as proof. “X-rays are clear, just some popped capillaries from all the coughing.” He added placing a reassuring hand on Sam’s shoulders.

The older girl rushed to Tara’s room, her sister set up a heart monitor and oxygen though she was steadily breathing again. Sam stood frozen at the foot of her bed. Kirby made her way into the room leaving the others in the hallway.

“Sam…” She started. “She’s okay. You saved her.”

“I didn’t fucking save her Kirby, I almost killed her.” Sam shook her head. Her palms striking her temples. Still stained with some of Tara’s blood.

“I put my hands over her mouth. I could feel her fighting me. I suffocated her.” Sam cried, pulling her hands into view.

“You did not suffocate her, you saved her. You did what you had to do to save her.” Kirby pulled Sam’s hands down and held them. She pulled her into her arms hearing what had happened in that room for the first time.

Kirby had basically adopted the Carpenter duo as her own, she made them her responsibility even if they all liked to pretend that Sam and Tara had everything under control.

It was easy for Kirby to come in and help. It was easy for Sam to let herself go in the agent’s presence. It was even easier for Tara to relate to Kirby and accept the advice that she would offer even if it was the same advice Sam would suggest- It must’ve sounded different coming from the older girl.

“She didn’t even want to be there, she asked me to leave and I- I made her stay” Sam continued to cry into her ‘older sisters’ chest.

It wasn’t long until Sam composed herself and put on her brave face for the rest of the group and they all gathered around in Tara’s room. Sam next to her bed of course rubbed circles into the smallest girl’s hand.

Tara had regained some color, still much paler than her usual complexion, but better than before. Her lips were once again pink and she had lost the gleam of sweat. All to the group's relief.

No one dared to leave even as the early hours of the morning threatened to trap them in the hospital.

Soon the silence was broken by Chad offering himself to get chips and snacks from the vending machines which he would later regret because

A) he used all of his cash

and B) Girls are too ‘particular’.

The group shared jokes and conversations trying to move on from the earlier events and living more in the moments they were all together. They had grown quite the roar almost as if they were in the sister’s apartment and it was a casual Friday night. Arguing over what M&M flavor tasted the best with Sam reluctant to admit she thought they all tasted the same because- well didn’t they?

First there was a cough. It came from the smallest member of the group. They all stopped mid debate, assessing the situation. They watched as she stirred in her bed sitting up frantically and coughing “SAM” she yelled between her coughs.

“Tara” Sam grabbed her. “It’s okay, breathe, you’re alright” Sam cooed.

Tara took in her environment no longer in a dark dusty theater but rather in a bright antiseptic room surrounded by the worried faces of her friends, Family.

She took a deep breath in, she was sore but it didn’t burn, she was able to breath without a fight. She relaxed into Sam’s touch.

“Jesus christ I never want to do that again.” She chuckled. After a pause of her remembering the earlier events. Everyone laughed.

“Glad to see you’re doing better.” Kirby grabbed the girl’s knee in support.

They continued the night moving onto the next candy flavor they could debate about. After of course Tara added that the blue M&M is the best tasting one. And Sam could not have been more grateful to hear such ridiculous words come out of her mouth. They were okay, Sam prayed to stay like this at least for a few more minutes.

[shadow-genesis-yay]

Gimme them Memory headcanons! Please!

Say less! o7

>headcanons under the more/reading<

(Sorry it's long & for late response, was shopping for birthday stuff)

First 1: Memory in my design has white streaks they got from Void's side! Void just dyes his hair black to hide em for unknown reasons (probably ego or smth I dunno. Voids out of my control /j)

2: They're 6'4, uses mostly It/They but also uses he. They prefer mostly the other two tho but won't get mad if he is also used. (This one's mostly based off how in canon, Memory was referred to as a thing by Sabre, and he would use It/They until switching to He. Mem was still called a thing but used he ig). Oh and ig they also used nicknamed but only like it when Void calls em them. Like Memmy/Mem/Memoy/Fancy Steve lol

3: He has light sensitivity and uses their mask to help it when outside of the void/memory dimension

4: It has heterochromia, but in a different way! His left eye doesn't have a iris/pupil, and the area that's supposed to be white is pure red like Voids. (I think it's called the sclera) and also on said left side, they have a scar on its cheek that it got during some event they doesn't like talking about

5: Memmy likes cats and owns two! One tuxedo cat named Voodoo, and the other, a black cat (Bombay I think) called Morticia! Memmys had them since they was a smol lil swirly peppermint boi, and treats them like royalty as deserved 😤

6: (this one's kinda from a quote my friend made but it's too funny to not make a Memory headcanon) If Memory got called a specific slur I'm not gonna say, he'd just be like "Yeah no duh, it's obvious. Now please tell me something I already don't know about myself, or leave please and thanks."

7: Memory is highly skilled in swordsman ship, archery, and fighting. It's won awards in competitions they entered secretly (not because Void would be mad, but because they're Void's son. Void's like a king/God in the eyes of the other steves [of course except Nightmare LMAO] and terrifies em.) They's only lost once and that was more on its end since he didn't want to do competitions anymore, so they purposely disqualified itself by starting a fight.

8: while this one may be more of a ship that was started for funnies, it took my brain over so uh yeah. Memory is married to Faceless. The reason for why (to me) is because since Faceless doesn't have a face (no duh), he's immune to Memory's powers, even when mimicking others. And Faceless just couldn't resist a fancy boi in a suit. (I love this ship but at the same time I'm like "I want it gone from my mind its been 3 months help") ik they never met canonically but I speculate they met a tiny bit when Elemental worked for Void and El had to capture Faceless. It's a long shot but yolo I was bored

9: Memmy boi like flowers. Mostly roses or any black flower, but they'll be content with any other color if red & black are unavailable :)

10: While Memory may seem stern and cold, when you get to know them, he's really nice! Though it's usually always on guard and will unintentionally break your arm if you happen to spook them (somehow).

11: Memmys very sneaky and will smile a cheeky smile when it scares someone from behind.

12: Memory really hates cameras. Like, REALLY REALLY hates em. Whether it's off or not, they don't care and WILL throw a dagger at it. This one's more from a funny thing Sabre himself replied with in his discord when I said "I wish Memory had more screen time. He would of bee such a cool villain" with Sabre replying "maybe he did but we forgot".....I walked basically right into that joke but I love it so I'm considering it canon /hj

Uhhhh yeah anyways I think that's it other than more funny meme ones me and a friend made when I was bored and thought 'what if after the camera was off, Sabre and the steves would have a smp world together' and Memory would be the sometimes chaotic one of the server.

Ye uh I rambled alot lmao idk if this will even post but thank you so much for the ask and willingness to hear the headcanons about our silly little peppermint boi! Memory deserves so much more love that what's seen, I love him so much

Memory Steve, our beloved 'forgotten' king <3 👑

[ikoarts]

November 2023 Art

as u can probably tell i did not pump out much art this month and the little i did do besides the big project is a lil basic or just working shit out, but erm, it's not Nothing, so thats good...!

vvv dates + info under the cut vvv

1 - 01/11/2023 : my half of an art trade with @toxicbunny from last year, i never posted it here oops, but its of her OC Luan <333 he was so fun to draw and im super happy with the results, esp playing around with texture a bit

2, 3 - 18/11/2023 : some random headshots of Heidi n Jasmine, think with Jasmine i was trying somethin a lil different with her hair

4 - 18/11/2023 : pen doodles.... a bit of trying to figure out some more human ttte designs, not perfect ofc, still naawt concrete on any kind of James design, like i know how he looks, but drawing hard </3 Thomas is also there hehe

5 - 18/11/2023 : another Heidi :D i think i wanted to draw her with her hair up like that, erm, i forget, but hey JTHM shirt, very epic, it was on my mind, i had the silly idea post-drawing this that she has insomnia and the shirt is an inside joke, coz she thinks shes funny

6, 7 - 18/11/2023 : (only by a margin coz i was drawing late again) lil human Diesel pen doodles again, this time we're doing the REDESIGN!! almost there anyway. mostly just a redesign of his hair somewhat, also Philip is just there (much like the show (jk i kinda love Philip for no reason other than hes a little guy)) not much to say here other than drawing bad on purpose is fun x

8 - 25/11/2023 : was thinking about book covers, forgot why, but also on the name of my story for Ru, Toni, those fellows, usually i just call it Violet, but i feel maybe its a bit, nothing, idk, like its not catchy enough, so i have another idea of expanding it into You, me, & Violet, and heres a quick mockup of what a book cover for it could look like.. u can tell i got graphic design qualifications from the late 2010s x (shut up i luv this doodle)

9-11 - 25/11/2023 : Robin redesigns.. again.. just some concept doodles, mostly just a change to his hair and his top, i thought adding more colour was essential, so, he'd usually wear like minty green colour trainers, i made those and, by extension, his jumper, the same blue colour, which isn't Too blue, it's still a little bit greeny, very slightly, just for some harmony in his design.. will need to draw more of this concept to really get a concrete final design

[averyangrypossum]

Caved and decided to share my main OC in the camp camp art style and universe

Even though I made my character in the camp camp art style a while ago the person that inspired me to post it/expand on it was @brewingcoffi with their OC, go check out their blog their stuff is so cool!

Lore and character under the cut

But anyways this is basically my main OC Jessie during the epilogue of her story. Where everything is (kind of) resolved and shes just left to pick up the pieces of the aftermath.

After her whole fiasco shes sent to Juvie for 11 months and afterwards sentenced house arrest and court ordered therapy, and after a while of being at home for house arrest shes granted permission to go to a camp to help her get re socialized with other “normal” children. And thats how she ends up at Camp Camp, specifically during seasons 1-4 since I don’t know if I want to draw her what she’d look like during season 5.

With an eye missing and a whole lot of baggage, literally and figuratively, she signs up for writing camp.

And she ends up having a great time! Not at the star at first cuz shes a little emo, but she starts making friends with the other campers, specifically Harrison. Shes one of the most troublesome camper besides Max but shes not seen as such by anyone other than Max because she inherited her father’s master manipulation skills.

Like father like daughter.

She has a stuffed bear similar to Mr honeynuts (Max’s bear) but it doesn’t hold the same weight since its really just a placeholder for another plush she had. Plus she has a pet emotional support raccoon that she successfully was able to take with her.

Her relationship with the other campers and counselors is how I rank it down here:

1. Harrison

Harrison is her tent-mate and her best friend at camp, basically like a brother to her, twin brother if you will since they found out they were born on the same day. Shes basically his number one supporter in magic and he frequently reads her stories and gives feedback.

2. David

She participates on the activity of torturing him with the other campers but she secretly sees him as a father figure, and hes the first one she goes to in the middle of the night when she cant sleep due to night terrors, and makes him make her a midnight snack.

3. Dolph

As an artist to another artist, they love each other’s company, Jess likes to draw too but more in a doodle kind of way and not of still life or arts and crafts kind of way. She likes watching Dolph paint in a way to call her down, and Dolph likes asking her if he could paint a scene from her stories.

4. Ered

Like everyone, she thinks Ered is cool, and admires Ered and even has a crush on her. WHICH IS BAD BY THE WAY! Cuz she has SEVERE mommy and daddy issues and anyone either older, cooler, maturer, and or smarter than her she will probably have a crush on them. But OTHER than that, they have a nice friendship where Jess asks Ered to teach her tricks on the skateboard, it does not usually go well.

(Oh and fun fact I actually met Ered’s voice actor and even got a signature from her at a con I worked at, she was so nice and shes just a really cool person)

5. Nerris

Jess has played DND before which leaves Nerris to frequently ask her to play with them, and sometimes Nerris would ask for story telling advice for future campaigns.

6. Preston

Jess’s mom and dad were both actors so she grew up having love for the industry, back when she still looked up to them. She even wanted to be an actor briefly when she was six but she grew out of it. Which leads Preston to cast her first in his plays since shes

“one of the only amateurs at this camp with an ounce of talent in her bones” -Preston

Although shes absolutely horrible at singing and pretty un-enthusiastic about acting. Not to mention she thinks Preston’s scripts are awful and once proposed to write on for him, he didn’t talk to her for four weeks in spite.

7. Neil

Her best friend outside of camp is literally THE BIGGEST NERD IN EXISTENCE TO THE POINT HES CONSIDERED A PRODIGY, which leads to her having a soft spot for nerds such as Neil.

And with what we are shown in season 3 episode 6, he falls easily for girls who know basic science. Which with Neil being the socially awkward person he is, sometimes he unintentionally makes her uncomfortable. Plus not to mention she enjoys Harrison fucking with him with magic, she finds it incredibly funny to the point its a little mean spirited. Other than all that other stuff she sometimes hangs out with him while Nikki and Max are doing their own things as she watches him do whatever science thing he happens to be doing.

8. Nikki

They don’t interact much, but Jess enjoys hanging out with her from time to time, and Nikki is the only other person Tim (Jess’s raccoon) likes.

9. Gwen

Her least favorite counselor but thats not saying much since theres only two of them. She still enjoys Gwen’s company and their relationship increases over the course of the summer, where Gwen helps Jess with her issues and complicated feelings towards her mother.

10. Space kid

She thinks hes weird, treats him like everyone else does unfortunately. Shes not really better than the others.

11. Max

Max doesn’t like her for most of the summer, because hes challenged for the title of being the biggest bastard at camp. Plus whenever she does said trouble, she gets away with it most of the time unless she’s cornered where she resorts to blaming it all on Max when he didn’t do shit for a change, and she is believed because shes seen as the ✨quiet sweet troubled girl✨ in David’s eyes and Max is Max.

They do end up having a partners in crime dynamic, specifically after parents day when he sees only her best friend came even its a PARENTS day. Which makes their dynamic more like a big sister and little brother, in the way ACTUAL siblings act.

12. Nerf

Hates how he physically bullies the other campers, in a way that isn’t entertaining to her.

13. Quarter master

Like the rest of the campers she thinks he’s INCREDIBLY weird even though shes used to supernatural elements so thats saying a lot.

14. Cameron Campbell

Hates him the same amount as the others.

15. The wood scouts

Has to restrain herself from making Edward join the one eye club eveytime she meets him, along with his posey but I forget if Snake has a damaged eye or no eye at all.

16. The flower scouts

Hates them the most and thinks they’re absolutely insufferable. Sasha reminds her of her mother especially and overall would pick a fight with them if she wasn’t literally held down BY THE LAW.

Thats it on this, I’m cringe but I’m free ~☆

[unlimitedtrees]

nearly all of the character designs from 'UNITRES Dreams'

(once again, this post didnt have a “read more” part in da original cohost post, so im putting it here... click more if U Dare !!)

so, trying to get back into making art again, i decided to draw brand new references of all the character designs from my game, UNITRES Dreams. cus why not. anyways these references arent Perfect.. some of em ive made better reference sheets before (while for this i just wanted to draw em all together with a sort of consistent color style and their current, up-to-date designs) and also i didnt get to draw Every character as it is Too Much and i am Too Lazy to draw all of the enemies and boss designs ... so ive just included the enemy and boss sprites for now.. but ill probably draw new art for them sometime.

Anyways. let me tell ya a bit about making Character Designs for this game. as ive talked a bit about in my post about making Character Sprites , making stuff for the game is hard because i am pretty much the Only person working on the game and i have to split my time working on the sprites between working on Every Other Aspect Of The Game , meaning i dont get to spend as much time making the artwork as detailed and polished as id want to.

and the same thing goes for making the Character Designs. sadly, i didnt get to make as many Actual Characters as i wanted (you can tell which are the Actual Characters as theyre the ones i Actually Redrew Here). when the project started, i only really had the Main Three Playable Characters in mind.. in fact most of the other Actual Characters didnt even Exist until the Very Very End of development.. which is the part im sad about. i just didnt have enough time to think about adding any complex new characters or figure out how i would Make a new character design . Which leads me to the Other Characters... which includes Most (but not All) of the Bosses and Enemies. Their designs are well , Basic . their designs werent really thoughtout ;they were created to serve a single purpose: to be made quickly so that the game could Have enemies and bosses. if i were remaking this game now, id probably remove or even completely Redo a Ton of the enemy designs (except the post-UNITRES Dreams enemies ... im kind of proud of them Lol !!)

thats just how things were. i didnt have enough time to focus on making character designs, so i didnt get to make a Ton of them and i had to make them Fast . in fact, early on in development, i hadnt really had much experience making character designs (as , before UNITRES, i didnt really make too many Original Characters for my games before), so i struggled experimenting and making characters for a lot of its development. And The Designs themselves .. a lot of them (even the ones i like) are pretty simple. Most characters are comprised of simple shapes and details , making them easy to draw and animate. and a lot of the early designs used Very Few Colors , which made drawing them quicker.

Despite All Of This , However, i am actually pretty proud of a lot of the designs ive made for this game (Especially the ones with the fancy new drawings i made here ..). while theyre simple, and while i wish i couldve made More characters with more unique designs , i really like the designs i got to make for this game ,with some of em being my favorite to draw even when im bored .. and i just felt like id talk about em.

And Well , Im Gonna Talk About Em !! click da 'read more' thingy if u want to Read More ..

the Main three characterz

"trees"

so first off , let me talk about "trees". before i can get into their Actual Design , let me tell u a bit of history so u can understand why theyre designed the way they are.

So . around November 6, 2018 , before UNITRES was really a thing , i designed the very first version of Trees that u can see above. while i didnt know what the game was going to Be , i had a Basic idea of what i wanted the Character to be from the very beginning. you see, Trees (the character) ,while having the same name as me , is Technically Not a self insert , Kind Of . I designed this character near the beginning of when i started entering a Very Low Point mentally in my life (which involves some personal stuff im not going to get into , Aswell as this point happening Around when Among the Others released) and i thought Very Negatively of myself . And So , this character is sort of an exaggerated version of the negative thoughts i had about myself at the time .

the main characteristics of the character was they Did Not Show Their True Emotions , instead bottling up their feelings and showing a very Fake , happy version of themself. theyre also kind of Fucked Up in the head and try to hide it . anyways theres more stuff going on with them that you can probably extract from both the games and the old descriptions in this concept art , but i wanna leave that as a surprise for when i get to make my next game. There Are some outdated things from the descriptions in the concept art , such as an idea where Trees would be Always Facing Forward , hiding away their backside. And Also , you may notice theyre referred to as "it" and "his" in this , which has well. Changed . teehee.

as for The Design Itself , i wasnt really sure what i wanted to go for at first. this character was actually one of the Few first Actual Character Designs i made at that point , so i didnt really have any idea on what to do. One day , i thought up of a Little Bear Looking character , and i tried drawing that character .. only for it to Sort Of look like a little fox-like character. and i imagined this character emoting mainly by very subtle details , such as the Hat and Ears changing shapes based on their emotions ..

Anyways , later that month , i drew the very first sprite of Trees , which ended up being used as the Idle sprite for the UNITRES tech demo. i wont be sharing What that sprite was originally for , as im saving it for Something , but i Will show you Trees' sprite evolution:

from left-to-right , it starts with the very first Trees sprite. Then there's the first revision, which was done when UNITRES Dreams started development. Then there's the second revision , done for the Newgrounds update in 2021. And finally, there's the TREES' ADVENTURE version, which is the current version of the sprite.

with the first version, the sprite is Pretty Close to the first concept art. However , iremoved the blue part in the tail as i couldnt get it to look good in sprite form (or i just forgot to include it.. idont remember). I also removed some details , such as the little hair and the red blush, as i couldnt really include them on such a small sprite.

Anyways , so how did the design mutate into the current design ? Well , over time , i ended up drawing their ears and tail Longer , and ended up giving them longer and longer limbs (as it was Hard to animate them with the tiny limbs they had). Eventually , it got to the point where i decided to just redo the sprites to make em consistent with how i was drawing them , and thats how i got the second revision.

But Then , i started consuming media Other Than Sonic ! i think the main thing that infected my brain was Spinel from Steven Universe ... while Trees' design Did have a bit of the sort of rubberhose , silly limbs before (along with a Bit of contorting their form , as u can see with the expressions in the original concept) , when i saw the steven universe movie , i saw spinel and was Immediately like " Oh My Goodness Gracious . I Need To Make My Character As Silly As Her". And so , I leaned more into the silly , stretchy limbs . You can see this in the following sprites:

Anyways , as i kept drawing them and consuming more Non Sonic media , i ended up experimenting more with their design and adding some small elements from my inspirations .. one of the other main inspirations was Wander Over Yonder ,where i decided to draw Trees' hat to be more Silly and Big , like Wander's hat. i also ended up perfecting how i drew Trees , giving them more Sharp lines , Bigger and Sillier "hands" and "feet" , making their tail Huge , and just giving them a nice silhouette that i like . By the time of the Newgrounds update , i realized Trees' sprites were kind of Outdated , so i ended up redrawing Most of their sprites , and ended up with the version you can see in the current version of UNITRES Dreams ..

And well , Im Really Really proud of how their designed turned out . I Like to draw them a lot. and i think the way their design evolved has ended up fitting with their Actual Character really well .. the sort of Round , Soft elements such as their Big , Blobby hands/feet and their cute , silly face make them look , on the surface , cute and Silly . But then you have the more Sharp lines and elements , such as with their head and tail which i think makes their character have a bit of depth .. if that makes sense .

Idk . im not good at words or describing things . i just think their design now works really well with what i want to go for . and hey , a lot of my friends have drawn them and have drawn them Really Really Well .. i particularly like how people interpret their design .. with some people leaning into the more Soft , cute elements of their design , while some have drawn them Really Really accurately .. its really cool and im thankful for everyone whos drawn them before ..

Last Thing ill mention about their design (and i guess this goes for Most of the other designs) : Most of the characters in UNITRES aren't really supposed to be any Specific Species . Theyre all just sort of weird , ailen-like characters who do not abide to any sort of rules or reality or whatever. Trees is just Trees ; they're not supposed to be a Fox or any sort of Real animal or species or whatever, and that goes for every other character.

??????

so here's the very first designs of ?????? , who for now ill unofficially refer to as The Pink Character. When i first started development on UNITRES , i Knew i wanted there to be Three main characters: Trees, and two mysterious characters. and when i started work on UNITRES Dreams (back when it was known as UNITRES - BRAND NEW WORLD Edition) , i needed to create designs for them .. However , at this point i was still learning how to Properly Make Character Designs , and so i created the first sketch above ,and then created their first sprites , which . Well. I Ended Up Not Liking Their Design Very Much !

So . The whole point of this character is that they dont really know their own identity , with them not even having a Real Name . Their design was Supposed to be sort of Ambiguous .. However i was Not Sure what to do for their design . i wanted to make it so you couldnt really tell what their gender was (as originally , they were a girl ... but they do not have No Gender anymore) . However , when people first started testing the game , they just . thought they were a guy.

anyways . i just Did Not Like This Design . they didnt really have a Clear Silhouette .. they just didnt look like an appealing or memorable design to me. and i also i didnt like their color palette. So . when the game became UNITRES Dreams , i decided to completely redo their design . And Well ..

This is the first drawing of the new design. At First , i wasnt sure about their design , with things such as them being Pink and Having A Skirt, i was worried about Some People immediately being like "Oh , Theyre A Girl !".. but you know what ? Ive grown Very Very Attached to this design .. i think theyre both Cute and Recognizable , while still fitting the sort of character i was going for . Their sillouette , while not as Recognizable as the other characters , has enough goin on to where i think it is a bit recogniable and easy to read while still giving them a sort of Mystery regarding their identity .. if that makes sense . And their more monochrome palette compared to every other character helps sell that , i think .

i think theres probably some people out there who see this character as a girl , but i think theyre a good Non Gender Having character design . just cus theyre pink doesnt mean they gotta have Gender ! anyways , i love them. theyre my silly little strange creature. i hope you love them too .. there is so much i want to explore with this character in a future game .. and i think their new design has really stuck with me.

???

So , ??? , who i will refer to unofficially as The Blue Character, is supposed to Sort Of be the opposite of Trees (the character). they're Very Tired and Chill , not really too crazy or anythin. and i wanted their design to illustrate that, and well , out of every design ive made , theirs was pretty much perfect from the very moment i created them.

I dont know if i have any old concept of them on hand, but i Do have both the original sprites ,aswell as the newer ones which are pretty much the same as the old sprites , but more polished and with redone colors..

And, well. Yea . they didnt really change much ! The only aspects that changed was that i removed like , Two details that i felt cluttered up the sprites too much , that being the little Tired Eyebag/ whatever its called line beneath their eyes, along with the little Red Dot that was on their boots. Other than that , their design was pretty much Perfect. they were also pretty easy to make , as , with them being a sort of Opposite version of Trees , theyre pretty much based off Trees' design , except with a bunch of differences to make them feel like their own character (such as different body/head shape , a big silly hat , and Actual Boots).

there's nothing much for me to say about them. they're perfect.

the really gay ones

suzy, wavey, and their little Shine Catcher

Alright . so before i can explain These characters , u need a little bit of History .

So. when UNITRES - BRAND NEW WORLD Edition was "finished" , i went on to help with RRThiel and his game, MEGA MAN PERFECT BLUE. as you can see here, i worked on various backgrounds and tilesets for the game. Anyways , at one point , ithought itd be cool to remake the Intro Stage in UNITRES , as a sort of tribute to the game and also as a little extra thing for the new update i was planning on making (which ended up becoming UNITRES Dreams).

at first, this was Just going to be two levels based off the Intro Stage from Perfect Blue , However , later in MMPB's development , one of the backgrounds I did for one of the levels ended up being Completely Redone by other people on the team ,as my background didnt really fit the game's style .. However , i still really liked this background .. so I decided to reuse it for a new level in UNITRES , with it also being a tribute to the level in MMPB (though its a lot more loose compared to the Intro Stage level , Lol).

This level ended up becoming Greenhouse Frenzy in UNITRES , and i ended up turning what once was just going to be a two level bonus into an entirely new campaign with its own story in UNITRES Dreams. and with it being a whole new campaign , i wanted there to be New Bosses and New Enemies ..

So , for Greenhouse Frenzy - Section 1 , I was planning on a new boss ... and this boss was going to be ... Mr. Sauceman !

You See , for UNITRES Dreams i wanted to go Hard with including all sorts of little tributes to my friends and the people who helped with the game . Mr. Sauceman , being one of the composers of the game , let me use his character from the game hes working on as a boss in the game , and i thought itd be nice to have him be in Greenhouse Frenzy ,since that level is pretty much a big tribute anywayz.

So , Originally , i wanted the Sauceman boss to start out with a little Fake Out . You See, the MMPB level that Greenhouse Frenzy is based off has a robot master that i asked RRThiel if i could use for the level , but he said no. So , I decided for this boss that i would create a silly character Inspired by the robot master from the MMPB as a silly little joke , but then Mr. Sauceman shows up and that character explodes . And So , I Designed Suzy , a character who , while inspired a bit by the character MMPB , was made to be a bit different and also to be used for a silly little fake-out intro and to die in 5 seconds . You can see this on the reference sheet , where she didnt even have a name and is just referred to as "GF2 Fakeboss".

However . Two Things Happened : 1) I Grew Kind Of Attached To This Little character I Designed , And 2) I Ran Out Of Time. i couldnt implement the fakeout that i had planned ... and i didnt have a boss fight for Greenhouse Frenzy - Section 1.... So. I decided to just. Make her the boss fight of GF1. it just made sense ! i Originally had planned a boss fight based on the Magik Master boss from Chaotic Carnival , but reusing the character design for the silly fakeout ended up being quicker , and so she ended up being an Actual Character in the game.

And Then There's Wavey . she is a robot. i originally designed her as an enemy for the Intro Stage tribute level (a.k.a , Perfect City) , as i wanted it to have its own enemy. Her design is also Some What inspired by one of the robot masters from MMPB , though not as much as Suzy's is.

Anyways , despite Suzy and Wavey being inspired by characters from MMPB , i wanted them to be different and have their own sort of Character . And well .. their actual Personalities are different to the ones from MMPB , at least . In UNITRES Dreams , there is a hidden "Storybook" mode , which contains various stories which add a bit of Worldbuilding into the game .. and one of the stories details Suzy and Wavey . Basically , Suzy is a lonely gardener , who lives alone on her own strange little planet , who then travels across the galaxy to the Perfect City , where she ends up meeting Wavey , a military robot who Suzy becomes fascinated with ..

Anyways . my writing aint exactly the best , and i Refuse to go and reread the stuff i wrote for the storybook mode in unitres . but i tried my best to make suzy and wavey their Own sort of characters , having their own identity compared to the characters theyre based on. Oh , and by the way , suzy and wavey are gay LOL !! and they have a little baby plant that they raise . this is also told in the storybook but i unfortuately didnt get to explore this Much outside of that in the game... though there Is a secret you can find in one of the levels.

So. what do i think of these characters and their designs ? Well. Honestly. Im Not Sure . when i designed them both , i still wasnt Totally comfortable with character designs as i am now , and honestly . theyre not my Favorite designs . Wavey in particular is just . Well . Shes Just Metal Sonic in A Hat . she has her own little differences , but i cant lie . i probably coulda done better with her design . and suzy i think hasnt aged as well either . Idk. Also. In Case You Cant Tell , I am BAD with coming up with names . I Genuinely cant do it. i came up with both of their names on a Whim . i justdidnt know what to call them and i was running out of time LOL !!

anyways. last things ill mention are : the plant is a species known as Shine Catchers, which appear as enemies in Greenhouse Frenzy. Oh , and also , here's some concept art of them Lol !!

(oh , and i also forgot to mention: originally , suzy had green dots on her "hair", but i didnt know how to properly draw them on the sprites , so i left it out)

the Silly ones (a.k.a my favorite ones)

Millie

So . Millie is the most self-indulgent design Ive created .

Here's how it went: one December day in 2020 , I was sitting around bored as hell , when all of a sudden , the Silly Brained part of me Saw an idea pop up: A Tall , Hot , Cute Clown Man . And Instantly , I KNEW I had to draw him . But I Was in the middle of a Zoom call ... So . I opened up IbisPaint on my old Android phone , and drew the First sketch with my fingers that you can see above . And Instantly I Knew : I Had Done It . I Made Perfection .

More ideas grew , and i realized : I Could Do Something With This ! So , later , I came up with a whole reference sheet for him , and started planning on something: I was going to make More characters for UNITRES Dreams . You see , at the time , I was working on the v3.0.0 update for the game. This was Very Very late in development , before i even Planned there being a Newgrounds version (and before ninjamuffin convinced me to Make the newgrounds version LOL !!). Anyways. for so long , iwas disappointed that i didnt get to make a whole lot of original characters for the game .Most of the characters were either Enemies or Bosses. there was Barely any NPCs (aside from the guest character apperances).

i Also Realized: Chaotic Carnival , one of the most Important levels in the game , needed More love . So. I decided i was going to make new NPCs just for it , so that the level could feel even More alive and lived in. And that's when i created the Silly Trio , which started with Millie.

As for Millie's design , there isn't much for me to say. he is perfect. i love him and he is one of my favorite things ive designed. Yes , it Is self indulgent . Yes , i Do Want Him Carnally . teehee. Anyways , after designing Millie , i knew i had to design more characters .. which leads me to..

Goldian and Ellie

Goldian is a tall , polygonal magician man. He is in love with Millie. They are canonically dating.

Ellie is a bunny-like clown girl. She likes to entertain people with magic. I think she might be asexual , but i wasnt very sure when i created her.

Anyways. there isnt much for me to say. i Could get into some of the Character Lore perhaps . Millie , Goldian , and Ellie are all characters with troubled pasts.. they all had to run away from their homes due to circumstances , and they managed to find the mythical Chaotic Carnival, where they all met and decided to become entertainers. It gives them purpose , to see people happy. And they work under the Magik Master , a strange magician who has the ability to bend reality at will. They're all like a sort of Found Family .

that's all ill say about them. theres so much more i want to do with them in the future... i love these characters so much. theyre my favorite designs ever.

Oh ! Iforgot to mention . these characters (including millie) names also suck LOL ! Im not good with coming up with names !! all their names i came up with at the last minute

All The Other Characters I Forgot To Mention

the magik master

nothing much to say about them. theyre one of the first bosses i created, and i Kind Of like their design still , though i might consider redoing it so it fits with the rest of The Silly Ones ..

vie

nothing much to say about Vie . she's a flower girl, who spreads flowers to every level in the game. she got the flowers from the Suzy's Greenhouse ..

Misc. Concept Art