#anyway i listened to this song last night and was like. it's THEM

[things-arent-what-they-seem66]

Random stuff from Guardian Angel AU.

Angst bitch.

1: Nasty rumors Susan spread about Adam got to a point that one of his neighbors spitted on his face and called him a man crack whore when she saw him outside and near her kids. She also said she’ll call the police if she saw Adam near her kids again.

That was the final step into making Adam a full hermit.

2: Every parent tells their kid to stay away from “The weird man in 1A”, some even take it to a step further with saying he could hurt them. So, Adam is seen as a creepy criminal among kids. They run away from him if they ever see Adam at the halls.

3: Lucifer isn’t the only person who brought him food in Adam’s life. A nice lady named Rosie used to put food on his doorstep once every month when she noticed he barely got out and how terrible he looked. She worked with children, so she didn’t wanted to be seen with Adam much, but she also began visiting Adam once every six months, they had tea together and Adam felt like he saw a tiny light in his endless darkness.

But this only went on for two years. Rosie died because of a heart attack four years ago. She was the last person who lived in Lucifer’s apartment.

3: Charlie saved Angel and Vaggie. Angel from his addictions and Vaggie from self harm and suicide. I guess it’s in Morningstar’s genes to fall in love with a soul they saved :>

4: Adam played a song for Lucifer when he was still on Earth, which he gladly listened. It was the first time Adam had played his guitar for a long time.

And when Lucifer was forced to leave him, he played, sometimes even sang, the same song almost every night for two years. Because he missed him and it made him think of him.

Lucifer’s heart exploded while he was watching Adam do this from Heaven. He began listening it every night to sleep as well.

—

Hehe

Dude whhhhy 😭

Yeah getting spit in the face is not only fucking gross but an understandable reason for Adam to stay away. He ended up telling Lucifer about it but wouldn't tell him who.

And that would hurt especially with how the situation with his own kids went.

Awwww Rosie and Adam being friends I'm so soft for their friendship. Shame she died. That only served to isolate Adam more. Everyone leaves why bother making friends? No one likes me anyway so that was made easy.

I WAS GOING TO SEND AN ASK ABOUT ADAM WRITING LUCIFER A SONG!!!!

Yeah, the Morningstars definitely have a type as well ;)

Ahhh sweet angst.

What if Lucifer had to look up his onlyfans page? You know, to see what he was working with and how deep Adam is in this world. He sees all the photos and videos. Spoiler he's in deep.

Adam has thousands of subscribers. And hundreds of posts. It's surprising he would do this line of work because of his past. But maybe, it was Velvette who told him "You're gorgeous, why not make a profit off your looks? Here I have a website you can use."

Adam tries it and when he sees how many people want him and shower him in praise and compliment him and tell him how wonderful he is.

Just another addiction on the pile. Only this one makes money and he hates himself afterwards.

Bonus points if someone in the building is subscribed and wanted more face to face time. Even if it doesn't go THAT far they make sexual comments at him any time they see him. (A man most likely)

And that was another thing to keep Adam in his house. The money is great but he hates that it comes from this and it's a never ending cycle.

[upslapmeal]

Space Babies

Ok so I've been hopeless at doing my usual Episode Thoughts during s14 but if I don't get them posted before the finale then I never will. SO. the next few days will be a trip down memory lane to a whole 6 weeks ago before I'm off to the cinema on friday night!

here we goooo

no cold open we’re going straight in babes (heh)

I know we had it last ep but I do love a good seeing-the-tardis-for-the-first-time face

‘I’m the doctor’ yes you are!!

man I wasn’t a huge fan of 15's theme just hearing on its own in the concert but hearing it in context with him it works SO well

‘kinda posh’

‘they used titles’ and then i kidnapped a couple of teachers, told one to drop the 'Foreman' and the rest is history

ngl I've totally lost track of the gallifrey sitch

the master was going to blow it up then he didn't then the Doctor was going to then some guy stayed behind instead and then flux??

whatever we're back to last-of-my-kind square one

this is gallifrey theme my beloved how I have missed you

Martha and Bill yelling I told you so in the distance about the butterfly

‘Rubathon Blue of the 57th hemisphere hatchlings’ good to know I've got my Ruby tag sorted early doors!

anyway alien companion when

ooh they're going for a flying tardis

love fifteens energy!!

‘most of the universe is knackered babes’

‘the question is why did I run’ Doctor running is a key part of your whole deal. you know this right

‘yet again push the button’………when was the first time

(I have since learned there was meant to be a song on the jukebox that tied to this...would have been nice to see the jukebox being used. and also would have made these comments make sense)

…..baby looms?

‘food????? they’re not tomatoes!!’ lmao Fifteen is SO outraged

oh Ruby’s getting an End of the World moment <3

‘no boss or rent or taxes’ yeah forget time and space travel, NOW Ruby's thinking she's gotta get in on this

oh that baby is unsettling

oh no that baby mouth does not match that voice 

‘mummy and daddy are here!’ Ruby and Fifteen: 😬

it's so weird having fairly confident small child voices paired with very vacant baby faces

.....do these babies have nappies? that they change??

aww you can really see Ruby is used to kids, lifetime as a foster sister <3

ok Captain Poppy is the only voice so far that kinda works

‘oh popsicle’ naww Fifteen is so sweet with them

Fifteen and Poppy are so cute!!

also lol I love RTD going hard with the timeless child at every opportunity

‘nappies are changed at 1800h’ ok well that explains that

Ruby: ‘I didn’t mean to scare you 💞’ Fifteen: 'hey kids it's the BOGEYMAN!!!!!!' Ruby: 😠

ok listen. I know this is not it. but the boots and the length of the trousers.......Ruby's mum kinda looks like Thirteen

oh that's very much a hug-is-a-way-to-hide-your-face hug there

‘that’s the fate of every refugee, you have to physically turn up on someone’s shore’

Eric and the world’s most tiny and useless sword

‘a crock of waste product'

‘nice plan but what now' Ruby hon. this was your plan

you can really tell Ruby is used to looking after kids

‘don’t you touch them you illegitimate person’

FLAMETHROWER BABIES

oh Fifteen knows Ruby’s a keeper

‘oh babes…space babes’ lol Fifteen's just here to have fun (space) baby

‘it’s snot’ ‘it’s not’ the beauty of the english langauge

‘it is one of your children!!’ :(

even the (space) babies think that death by airlock disintegration a bit much

awooooooo!

I guess seeing the doctor save the bogey monster made them less scared??

appreciate RTD's commitment to getting some good fart work in both his first series of this show lol

but what will happen to the monster on the new planet??

like sure it's their sibling but.....does it know that?

‘I’m very very happy’ says the baby with the most sorrowful eyes I’ve ever seen

tardis key!!

Ruby letting 15 into the tardis <3

RIP Carla Sunday's kitchen ceiling 

first a crack and now this......at least the Doctor's giving the local plasterer good work

‘what the blinking flip’ Cherry Sunday's got a nanny filter on her

‘tell your mum not to slap me’ Thirteen got off light with Yaz’s mum

now when are we meeting the timelord called The Saggy Sheet??

the Doc's just going around giving their name willy nilly now lmao

as it should be I never enjoyed their name being a Big Mystery

kinda wish we got to see Ruby's family react to learning more about the Doctor!

hmmmm the dna scan is giving me v s6 vibes (derogatory)

Well that was a weird one, but since when hasn't DW been weird! Ngl it took me watching a second time to enjoy it a bit more because I was just SO thrown off by the baby voices lmao, but it was just generally a fun time, nothing too serious and just a chance to see a bit more of Fifteen and Ruby's dynamic! And it did tie in nicely to the ideas of Ruby and the Doctor both being abandoned, Ruby being a foster sister and the Doctor being the last of their kind. Two baby episodes in a row is enough for me though, glad it looks like next ep is baby-free, space or otherwise 😅

[majestic-kestrel]

Long live all of us crazy soldiers Who were born under calico skies May we never be called to handle All the weapons of war we despise

I'll hold you for as long as you like I'll hold you for the rest of my life I'll hold you for as long as you like I'll love you for the rest of my, For the rest of my life

--Calico Skies, Paul McCartney

[mattodore]

kiss me till you bite ♪

[honeyvenommusic]

❗️NEWGLASSANIMALSGLASSANIMALSGLASSANIMALSGLASSANIMALSGLASSANIMALSGLASSAN-

[myfriendtheghost]

had a GVF dream last night and naturally in my dream I had to log onto tumblr and tell everyone about my experience

so here I am fulfilling the prophecy

[dovedrangeas]

these fuckin songs........

[safyresky]

I got tagged DAYS AGO by @worstalfie for a MUSIC RELATED TAG GAME. MY FAVE KINDA TAG GAME. LOVE ME SOME MUSIC!

I then proceeded to go on a deep dive of reblog chains to see if it was like a specific???? 10 songs??? but it appears not to have been SO. WOE! TEN SONGS CURRENTLY LIVING RENT FREE IN MY HEAD BE UPON YE. LET'S GOOOOoooOOOOooooOOO

(also new post to save people's dashes bc it was a long one :3)

Wilson (Expensive Mistakes) - Fall Out Boy

2. Tastes Like Pain - Weezer

3. Rhythm of the Night - DeBarge

4. Spicy Margarita - Jason Derulo and Michael Bublé

5. Shut Up and Smile - Bowling For Soup

6. Burning Love - Wynonna (the cover from lilo and stitch! best version imo)

7. So Alright, Cool, Whatever - The Happy Fits

8. Na Na Na - MCR

9. Hard Times - Paramore

10. In The Blood - Darren Korb and Ashley Barrett (Hades game soundtrack)

No pressure tagging a few friendos: @thewayhistoryiswritten I KNOW you'll enjoy this one! @definitelyy-not-a-vampire, @nearquaad if ur feelin it bb 💃🏻💃🏻💃🏻 @alpharra I've no idea if this is your vibe but figured I'd tag ANYWAY bc it could be fun? :D OH AND ALSO @mellomadness and also @shittyelfwriter :D

And if any followers are like "ou this looks fun" consider this a tag!! :3

[reineyday]

saw a post about how mike's and will's spotify playlists are currently the only active playlists for "living" characters so i checked and apparently the only other active character playlist besides theirs is billy's 😂👌 love that for him, and for all billy enjoyers everywhere ✨️✨️

[seventh-district]

*wakes up at 5pm*

IT’S FRIDAY BABEY

*immediately opens youtube to go listen to the official version of Unknown by Hozier*

[tsumikicity]

tswift hasn’t Done anything recently, she just released a new album

wow neat, im not listening to that so either good for them or im sorry for their loss

[corcnaiism]

;-- mini analysis of some of the songs "tea party of the dead" ( name still under construction ) would perform. solely based on the modern au and interactions between me and @.excultum's muses. i like to believe all four bros contribute to writing songs tho they won't always reveal where they get their inspiration from. note: not every lyric reflects them and ofc they would change names and pronouns for privacy reasons from the public.

kathleen: a song about noctis' annoyance towards gladio bc those two have the most tension amongst the four ( mostly bc gladio isn't open about his big fat crush on nocts )

cocoon: a song about noctis towards prompto. nocts would literally die for prompto and refuses to let the rest of the world make prompto think he isn't good enough.

pacifier: a song about gladio towards noctis. same thing with the kathleen song tbh. those two just struggle to be "normal" with each other.

anything: a song about ignis towards noctis. mainly surrounding their struggles with each other whenever they would end up arguing. ignis has his boundaries but still is heavily there to support nocts no matter what.

fallout: a song about everyone in the group during their struggles with one another.

I pissed you off again

So that you'd leave me alone in Leeds again

And I got my stuff and left

Cause I got this friend, see, who put me up again

the first verse is noctis' pov.

So I spent my yesterday

Ducking your calls and in fear that things had changed

So I tidied up my place

'Cause you always told me it got me thinking straight

the second verse is ignis' pov.

You see now

I'm sorry if I drove your matches to my clothes

But you know how I can get sometimes

You see now

I'm sorry if I drove your matches to my clothes

the tiny bridge right before the finishing chorus is gladio's pov.

You see I, I was a test-tube baby

That's why nobody gets me

You see I struggle to sleep at night

But it's fine, she never lets me

You see I, I was a test-tube baby (always seem to just)

That's why nobody gets me (fall out when I'm most in)

You see I struggle to sleep at night (need of it)

But it's fine, Mary don't let me

and the finishing chorus is prompto's pov.

noctis is the bane of everyone's existence djsnaoskwjd but they are all supportive of each other and bros/boyfriends for life bc yes they are all dating

[ghostsandmirrors]

texts, texts, texts, texts, like you're tryna start a fight. yeah, i'll fuckin' text you back, i'm the dumbest girl alive.

- dumbest girl alive by 100 gecs — original images dylan: [x] | [x] | [x] | [x] | [x] | [x] bam: [x] | [x] | [x] | [x] | [x]

texture credits! n/a

[a-boy-called-micah]

.

[keyotos]

well aware, you are always mine

summary ⎯ bf headcanons w/ hsr men!!

includes ⎯ dan heng, gepard, blade, sampo, jing yuan

tana's thoughts ⎯ keyotos being active and writing?!!!?!!?!?!

dan heng

⎯ TOTAL acts of service bf. cuts fruit for you, organizes your closet with you, helps you rearrange ur bookshelf. like all of that. he is ur #1 helper in all situations and is probably the most reliable person u know. if ur ever having problems, you always call dan heng bc he always solves them for you

⎯ considerate bf. listens to all ur song recommendations and also your book recommendations. never takes your word with a grain of salt (most of the time)

⎯ not a big fan of shopping trips, but will go with you anyway. he will carry all your bags and help you pick out clothes. AND HE WILL GIVE U ACTUAL FREAKING ADVICE INSTEAD OF BEING LIKE, "it all looks good on you."

⎯ like dan heng will pull up with, "that color washes you out," or, "that does not match your color pallete at all." he's detailed wit it too?? the only reason why he knows all of this is bc he pays attention to you.

you see something you like? let's find it in that color that matches w/ ur fav pants so you can wear it all the time. don't worry, i already found it.

you look dissatisfied? dan heng thinks he knows why: you think it won't look good. oh, he was right? well, he can help you style it in a way for it to look good. you can wear that with the shirt you like so much, with some added jewelry, of course.

⎯ does not spend ANY TIME in his room (but who could rlly blame him). he's always in yours and he's lying down in your bed. he takes the phrase, "make yourself at home," to another level. but i guess he gets a pass bc you literally are his home.

⎯ he's sarcastic asl. since his guard is down with you, there's not really a need to maintain seriousness at all times. his dry and sarcastic humor really comes out when you're around him specifically. dating dan heng would make u a victim of the sassy men apocalypse.

⎯ dan heng is the type of person to stare at you lovingly (like HEART EYES are coming out) while you guys are taking a photo together. and you wouldn't even know until you saw the photo. like picture this: you are over here smiling and being cute or whateva. and then dan heng is there. he's obliviously staring at you: like how the light perfectly bounces off your face and how perfectly your eyes crinkle when you smile.

⎯ when he feels secure around you, he is the definition of lovesick. longing stares from far away (even tho ur dating)? yes. touchy (you make sure to tease him about it)? yes. buries his head in the nape of your neck? duh. like he is the whole package and he can never seem to let you go... like ever. you are constantly stuck in his head and also his body.

gepard

⎯ hilariously bad at taking pictures. like you tell him to get one angle and he gets the exact opposite angle. manages to always catch you off guard in every. single. picture. his excuse for this is, "but you look good in all of them :/"

⎯ when he gets super tired after work, sometimes when he gets home and finishes showering/etc, he just flops onto u. like. literally flops onto you. you're always shocked at first, but you move him into a position where he can comfortably sleep (and hold you) in and then you relax. he always apologizes for it later in the morning and makes sure to shower you in more affection than last night, but you always reassure him that it's fine.

it's only bc u take the time to take equally bad photos of him #payback.

⎯ you have to water his plants for him. we all saw this coming. but on the bright side, that means ur home more often!! and when you greet him on the couch after a long day... like you've never heard a deeper sigh of relief before. doesn't collapse on you like other days (thankfully). you two just spend the night eating dinner on the couch and watching reality tv. sometimes, when you fall asleep on the couch, gepard always brings a blanket from your bedroom and drapes it over you. and then he carries you into bed.

⎯weirdly good at cracking your back for you. like if he wasn't the captain of the silvermane guards, he could very well be a freaking chiropractor. like he knows all the right joints to pop, all the right places to put his hands, and all the right places to press down. and it feels SO GOOD. you've never asked him about it.

⎯ gets you really cute and considerate gifts since he isn't around a lot. sometimes gets lynx to deliver them for him. and they're always paired with your favorite flowers too. all his gifts r things that he remembered you liked/wanted (new shampoo brand, new book pela recommended, new plants).

⎯ still asks if you wanna go out even if you two have been dating long term. like he would text you and be like, "would you like to go out with me for coffee," all formal and wtv, and you would respond like, "gepard we have been dating for five years. you do not need to ask."

he would get all flustered when you would bring it up at the coffee shop. pays for your coffee so you could forget about it (you don't: you tease him endlessly).

⎯ learns other things for you. he's dedicated and loyal to you like how a soldier is dedicated to their general. if you wanted a specific kind of dish, gepard would learn how to create it. if you wanted to learn how to plant certain seeds, gepard would run to the florist (and pela) to ask for many tips. if you spoke a different language, gepard would be running to duolingo.

though there is always his duty, a part of his heart and soul will always belong to you.

blade

⎯ contrary to gepard, takes the BEST FUCKING PHOTOS of you. he should be a professional photographer or something because, all the photos he takes, makes you look like a MODEL. he gets all the angles perfectly right + he always makes sure the lighting looks good. and u look back at all the photos he took and ur jaw is DROPPED

⎯ hates going outside x goes outside 24/7. you're big on exploration and fun while blade wants to lie low. but either way, you two manage to have fun in your own respective ways. blade watches you from a distance (of 1 foot) and only intervenes if he needs to. other than that, you drag him around the entire place. he is not complaining: one stupid and cheeky grin from you, and blade realizes he is an absolute goner.

⎯ a little too supportive. it's a good thing in all aspects except for one: making decisions. this mf is like, "whatever you do, i fully support your decision." BUT THE PROBLEM IS THAT YOU CANNOT MAKE A DECISION. THAT'S WHY UR ASKING HIM.

⎯ this problem comes up very often during shopping trips. where dan heng excels at shopping trips, blade... not so much. blade is the type of bf to say, "everything looks good on you." but not bc he doesn't care enough: he genuinely thinks you look good in everything.

in his mind it's like: how could you think you look bad in that outfit when you are radiating luminosity from every crevice of the room??? does anyone else see that glow coming from you, or was it just him??

⎯ did not have a favorite color until you. he actually didn't have a lot of favorites before he met you. now his favorite color is blue (you like looking at the sky), his favorite scent is peach blossoms (the shampoo you use), and his favorite food is fried rice (it's the only thing you know how to make).

⎯ does ur hair for u. expert in hair care but it's not uncalled for (his only friends⎯not counting you⎯are silverwolf and kafka). you need to braid your hair? blade has already offered before u could even pull up a tutorial. a new cute hairstyle you wanted to try? don't worry, your boyfriend is there to help you part, section, and clip your hair.

⎯ pretends to give off big scary dog energy, in reality he is a small little lapdog. desires your love and affection so often. does not go out without you. grabs things n carries them to u like a cute little dog would. he's very devoted okay?? let him bring u stupid little trinkets and stay by ur side all the time.

⎯ you send him stupid ass memes all the time. one time u sent him one of those stupid 'good night' memes and he threatened to block you (lovingly). but he found that his reactions always make you laugh (and blade wants to keep you happy forever), so he just lets you send them to him atp. most nights, he sends a simple, "good night" text back. but when he wants to tease you, he sends a goodnight meme back.

⎯ those nights, he thinks that he hears your ecstatic giggles from down the hall. you sound so giddy that it makes his heart want to blow up. those are the good nights.

sampo

⎯ bro is mischievous. he leaves little sticky notes for you all around the house and makes it a game for u to find them. they're not even super important too they're just little things like, "i miss you," or, "did u find all the notes???"

⎯ but he knows you get bored easily, so he made those notes so that you could have something to do during the day. his intentions are adorably sweet, but his execution is so. um. A FOR EFFORT!

⎯ most of the stuff he gives you... hate to break it to u but they are usually stolen. if you choose to ignore that, great! most of the things he grabs are usually rare and u have no idea how he gets them. you swear he doesn't leave belobog, but some of the items he gifts you seem a little too... outlandish. but yk, it's the thought that counts!

⎯ manages to distract you from every single task. usually disruptive, but sometimes, very helpful. after an entire day of work, you can always come back home to where sampo is, because he will always find a way to distract you from whatever stress you have on your plate. whether it be cooking you dinner or simply talking you through his day, you always find yourself feeling slightly better around him.

⎯ has a good relationship with your family. yeah this was very unexpected on both ends. your parents love him: they love his humor and his looks and literally are charmed by him. even tho is a CON ARTIST. anyway. sampo loves your parents and messes around with you by calling them as their parental names (mom/dad). you are not amused.

⎯ grabs dinner before he comes back home. always manages to swing by a place you like and he always gets free food (you've gave up trying to question his methods). before, when he brought home food, it was usually a special occasion because he would never be home often. now, it's a common occurrence: he's wanted to be with you more, and now he brings home food every day.

jing yuan

⎯ the xianzhou's nagging king. this is not a good thing. he nags at you for a lot. did you take your allergy meds? did you eat breakfast today or just drink coffee? did you forget to clear out the pencils on your desk? he does it out of endearment. it does not make it less annoying (lies).

⎯ so accustomed to your little routines together that he can do it with his eyes closed. how do you want your tea? easy: he can list it within ten seconds. he can make it with his eyes closed. and he will always make it perfectly too.

⎯ lets you sleep on mimi (you could say you go mimimimi). not even gonna lie, sometimes he wishes he was mimi. you just sleep so peacefully on her, but you refuse to sleep on jing yuan. you make up stupid excuses like, "your bicep is going to be numb by the time we wake up." but that is simply not true (it is).

⎯ favorite times of day are when it's night. okay that didn't make any sense but he really just likes spending the night with you. it's quiet and the world is much less loud, and it feels like being with you redefined the definition of happiness. everything is so much more peaceful, and plus, you were there.

⎯ being a cloud knight general has its negative aspects. so, much like gepard, he would probably also crash into bed with you at night. but this time, he doesn't need you to move him, because he traps you in between his arms every. damn. time. it's like this man cannot fall asleep without you.

⎯ sitting down with him is like a chore. if you two are sitting down, jing yuan likes to grab your legs and move them onto himself, so you two would be closer. this isn't just on the sofa, by the way. armchairs, conference chairs, office chairs. the chairs don't even have to be connected. he'll just find a way to connect you two anyway.

⎯ you are the first person he looks for in a crowded room. in a place full of people, jing yuan's eyes will only scan for you. his height makes it easier to do so btw. but anyway, you are someone of great importance to him. he doesn't want to lose you like how he lost so many. and when he finds you, it's like the sun shines directly on you: it's always a surreal sight when jing yuan sees you, because he always thinks the sun has risen.

⎯ it hasn't. he was always looking at you.

AND GOOD NIGHT. jfc.

[elliesdoll]

idk why i keep thinking abt angsty loser!ellie… she is my baby

nsfw! just ellie masturbating n crying (me) 𝜗𝜚

pts 2 & 3 already posted!

a wonderful anon said my fic reminded them of this song and they r so right… listen to it rn

daily click! do not buy tlou free palestine 🇵🇸

ellie was so in love with you. she is so in love with you.

you are her light. your smile, your laugh, your everything. she just couldn’t get enough of you. being friends with you was probably the best blessing god could ever gift her, yet also the worst punishment.

she knew she could never have you.

not in the way she wanted, anyway.

you talk ellie’s ear off almost everyday, and ellie never gets tired of it. your sweet voice that felt like pure honey and warmth being poured into her ears. so sickly sweet. she swore you were a siren of some sort.

you were so perfect and you didn’t even know it. you would tell ellie about your escapades and little ‘situationships’ as you’d like to call it, and it made her sick. every last person you talked about seemed like shit. she couldn’t believe that you thought that’s all you were worthy of.

she would worship you if you gave her the chance.

she told you the same thing each time: “fuck them. you know you’re too pretty for them anyway.”

and you were always grateful for her. who else would remind you of your worth? you needed her, she was your rock. your fidgety, awkwardly nerdy rock.

she was always the shy type. or she was around you, at least. she was never too bashful, but sometimes she’d slip and show you just how nervous you make her. her freckled skin would turn all pink, her eyes avoiding your gaze. she’d have an awkward, thin-lipped smile, and you could feel the clamminess of her hands if she was touching you. you’d find it cute, how she’d just melt if you two were touching or you’d give her a compliment on literally anything.

but what you didn’t know, is how she hated herself for it.

after anytime you two hung out, she’d go home, stomping to her room and looking down at her feet. “so fucking stupid.” she’d mutter to herself, thinking of all the times she stuttered around you or got all warm in the face. but without fail, each little mishap would lead to her in her bed, a string of curses leaving her mouth while pathetically fingering herself to the thought of you.

one particular night, she had shown up to your house unannounced. knocking at your door, leaning back on her heels as she waited for you to open up.

she doesn’t normally do this. she never does this. but she thought maybe you two had gotten close enough. just enough for her to show up at your home anytime she felt like seeing you.

so when you opened the door, and she saw your hair a bit disheveled, your cheeks flushed and what appeared to be a hickey below your jaw, that thought quickly went away.

“fuck, els. i’m sorry but… really bad timing.”

you said with a light chuckle, giving her an apologetic smile. she just stared at you, eyes wide and her cheeks red.

“fuck. i’m sorry, shit. i don’t know why i showed up here— i wasn’t thinking. sorry.”

she mutters, stuttering over her words. she hated how her tummy got all fuzzy and how her boxers suddenly felt all warm and soaked. all while having the biggest lump in her throat.

before you could say anything back, she was already speed walking away from your front door, down to her car. she got in and drove away, not even bothering to see if you were still there, watching her.

she felt so fucking stupid. her vision was blurry as she drove home, speeding until she finally parked in her driveway. who the fuck was in your house? which one was it fucking you? did they even love you like she did? she wanted to crawl into a hole and die.

she swung the door open, then slammed it behind her as she ran to her room. she closed the door and locked in, and let the tears flow. she kicked her beat up converse off, and aggressively rubbed her cheeks to get rid of the wet tears that rolled down them.

“fucking idiot.”

“why the fuck would i?— god.”

“what did i think? she doesn’t love me.”

she mumbles to herself, all through hiccups and stuttered breaths. her pretty cheeks are wet with hot tears, her eyes red and watery. even her poor nose is all stuffed up, making her sound nasally as she dumbly insults herself.

one by one, she removes her clothes. she fiddles with the button of her jeans and undoes it, hooking her thumbs under the band of her boxers at the same time, and kicks it all off. she then moves to her hoodie, messily taking it off and cursing when it gets stuck on her little bun. she even takes her sports bra off, which she never does.

fully naked and vulnerable, she turns all the lights off and crawls into bed.

she sobs into her pillow, feeling like some pathetic idiot. she doesn’t know why she ever thought you’d feel for her the way she feels for you. she felt so fucking perverted too— getting wet over the idea of you getting fucked. getting wet over your smile, your touch.

she sniffles, her slender hand slithering down to her pussy. she sighs as her middle finger lightly swipes by her clit, feeling just how wet she is. she brings her ring finger into the mix and circles her clit, gathering all the wetness from her clenching hole.

she moans, quietly. ellie isn’t typically a moaner, but she is right now. she is for you. she rubs her clit rapidly, the sounds of her squelching pussy filling her dark room. she closes her eyes, not wanting to cum too quick. she stars to think about you, and her fingers go to plug her hole.

she imagines you below her, giving her that sweet smile as she made love to you. she wanted to love you so bad, it hurt.

“oh god— shit,” she whined to herself, legs spread and feet planted on her bed, knees bent as she mercilessly fucked herself to the thought of you. she wanted to make you cum by her fingers, mouth, cunt— whatever the fuck you wanted.

her imagination switched to your mouth on her pussy, lapping at her clit and eating her out like you’d die if you didn’t. she let out a shaky whine, imagining that her fingers were your tongue, moving in and out of her as your nose nudged her clit.

ellie’s breath sped up, her eyebrows knitted upwards as she felt that hot, sticky feeling in her belly just come flooding out. her cunt pushed out and clenched around her fingers, as she cums with a strangled cry. her body covered in a thin layer of sweat, and her thighs trembling as her slick came gushing out of her, staining her sheets below her.

she slowly pulled her fingers out, catching her breath. she could feel her heart in her ears. but the ache never left. she’s still crying, just not as theatrically. she doesn’t even bother cleaning herself up or her bed, just turning to the side and hugging her pillow. she shoves her face into the plush pillow, her wet face dampening the fabric. and there, cum sticking her thighs and pussy together, naked, she fell asleep.

and she’ll never move on, either. you haunt her, even in her dreams. doomed to love you in every reality.

aaakkk i dunno how to end these 😖 this is my first fic(?) drabble thingy ever so pls be gentle haha lol ☺️☺️☺️👍

this is so rushed bai 😑