#anyway. i hate you modern technology

[natjennie]

looking into solutions bc one of my airpods is wayyy quieter than the other like almost no sound on the right and all the sound on the left. and looking at different websites saying that it might just be because they're old, they're only designed to last 2-3 years, etc, is making me so sad and also furious. remember when you used to have one computer for 10 years. remember when chargers and headphones would just. work. and you could have them for a while and be fine. I miss longevity so bad. why are my headphones only 3 years old and they don't fuckign work. I'm gonna strangle someone.

[dizquized]

FOR YOUR OWN SANITY, do not look in the tags, dont do it. its not worth it. a demon possessed me or something, i dont know.

[caterpillarinacave]

rip Will Herondale you would have loved Candy Crush

[cheeseknives]

Everytime I feel useless, I think about how our neighbors' Skoda has its own WiFi

[tonycries]

A Picture Lasts Long (But Not As Long As That D*ck)

Synopsis. Smile for the camera - as best you can when you’re being absolutely wrecked in all sorts of ways underneath them anyway!

Pairings. [SEPARATE] Gojo x Reader, Choso x Reader, Nanami x Reader, Geto x Reader, Toji x Reader

Content. MDNI, fem! reader, exhibitionism (Toji’s), mutual másturbation, phone séx, créampie, oral (female + male receiving), vibrators, bóudoir, manhandling, marking, Gojo is a menace, fíngering, dp, face-sitting, some HEINOUS things, pet names, swearing.

Word count. 3.8k

A/N. Was gonna add Sukuna but I feel like he’d hate modern technology.

♡ TOJI FUSHIGURO - The internet sensation

“Whaddaya say, you horny fuckers? Think she deserves to cum?”

Now, Toji Fushiguro is always one for extra cash. Who wasn’t, really? So when you approached him with a devious idea, well, how could he ever say no to his pretty girl?

He just didn’t think he’d be here - your bare legs splayed out on his lap, dripping cunt spread so shamefully, buzzing vibrator deafening over your pretty moans - all in front of that blinking camera. And the hundreds of thousands behind it.

“T-Toji, wan’ cum. Wanna cum so bad, please.” you mewl. Big, fat tears dripping down your cheeks at the way he’s been teasing you for so long now. You can barely make out the rush of comments flashing across the screen.

The camera captures everything so sinfully well. The way your cunt is completely soaked, clenching desperately around nothing as Toji slides the vibrator along your swollen folds. Circling your needy hole, just grazing your swollen clit. Teasing them just as much as you. 

Pathetic fuckers, he thinks, but entertains their desperate comments anyway.

“Hmm, they’re saying I should let you cum, pretty.” he whispers in your ear, low and hoarse with need. “Saying I should be ‘nice.’” 

He brings the vibrator - now glistening with your slick - to his lips. Licking a long, languid stripe up it, collecting your sweet juices on his tongue. Turning it ever-so-slightly towards the camera to show off what the fuckers behind it will never get, he hums dangerously, “What do you think, my girl?”

You gasp out a sob, uselessly trying to buck your hips toward where you needed him the most. “Please, Toji. Wanna cum, I’ll do anything.” 

“Oh yeah?” he chuckles, spreading your legs open even further with a feral groan. 

In one, fluid motion, he buries the vibrator deep in your dripping cunt, relishing the surprised yelp that leaves your swollen lips. “Then show ‘em how much you like it, pretty. How much you love me not being ‘nice.’”

And that’s all that is said before he’s fucking you into you at an urgent, sinful pace. Pulling out all the way till the buzzing tip just circles your swollen folds, ramming into you with no care or concern for the burning stretch. Toji knew you liked it - besides, it was half the size of him anyway.

“C’mon, smile for the camera, pretty.” he grunts into your ear, “Tell ‘em how I make m’girl feel.” 

You can barely choke out, “Ah! Oh- shit. S’good. Hngh-”

Blood rushes straight to his cock at the way you were taking it like such a good girl. Head lolling against his muscled shoulder as Toji pushes the vibrator in and out in and out in and-

“Yeah? Who makes you feel this good?”

Angling it just right to expertly hit against that one spot he knew would have your eyes rolling to the back of your head. 

“Ngh- Ah! You!” you whine, thighs quivering at both the burn of being so spread open and the electricity coursing through your veins at Toji’s relentless pace. Mind spinning, vision blurring, you barely register the hand snaking its way down down down.

A harsh thumb pressing down hard on your throbbing clit. “Wha- Toji hah-” you squeal as he starts drawing slow, tight little circles on it. Lazy and languid where he was fucking into you mercilessly like you were his lil’ toy right below. 

“Tha’s right, my girl. Say it for all those lonely little fuckers behind the camera to hear.” He doesn’t stop thrusting the vibrator into you, instead speeding up his movements impossibly at the lewd squelches filling the heady air.

“You. No one- else- hngh-” you moan softly hips bucking up in tandem with his hand. “M’gonna- Ah ngh- m’gonna-”

“Say my name, pretty.”

“T-Toji! Hah-” you squeal deliriously, cumming desperately around the buzzing vibrator. Walls clenching as he continues to fuck you through it. A smug little smirk on his face as he watches the way your eyes flutter closed, body bowing jerkily into his. 

Ah, you look so pretty like this. Those losers behind the screen were probably at the gates of heaven already. 

In the haze of your orgasm, you barely hear the low murmur from above you. “Now, you horny fuckers. Think her pretty hole can take my cock at the same time?”

♡ GETO SUGURU - The secret album

Geto Suguru doesn’t let anyone touch his phone - especially his photo gallery. Always turning off the screen from prying eyes, pocketing it safely before flashing an innocent grin. 

But why? That one time Shoko stole his phone while he was in the bathroom revealed only a few blurry, aesthetic shots of you, the sky, and you. So what did that man have to hide?

Well, what she didn’t know is had she scrolled down just a bit more - before Geto ripped the phone from her hands - she’d have come across the treasure trove named with a simple “Love.”

Not one, not even tens - but hundreds upon hundreds of videos of you all falling apart underneath him.

Most of them favorited, all of them sorted so meticulously according to his tastes in a way that showed he spent an obscene amount of time looking at all the ways he ruined you. But it wasn’t enough to capture your perfection. It never was. 

Which is probably why Geto had you sitting prettily on his face, juices spreading so lewdly across his mouth as he tonguefucked you into insanity. 

The video was shaky, focusing in and out of the way your bruised lips dropped into a soft oh! as he bullies past your swollen folds. 

It zooms in on the dazed expression on your face, eyes miles away. “Oh, Suguru. M-more” your broken moans crackle through the speaker. Just barely capturing the soft ah! ah! ah! escaping your lips each time Geto’s tongue dips into your sloppy hole. 

Oh, this video was definitely going in his favorites.

“Take the phone, love. Show the camera how good I make you feel.” he murmurs into your dripping cunt, words hoarse with desire. 

And Geto might love you on film - but this was your favorite part. When the camera flips and you see him in all his disheveled, sinful glory. “Ah- y’look so pretty under me, Sugu.”

Dark hair splayed out on the pillow, stray strands sticking to his forehead as he looks at you with hazy, pussy-drunk eyes. His ringed fingers holding your thighs apart in a bruising grip. Lips glossy and swollen as they continue their abuse on your ravaged pussy. 

Flattening his tongue along your swollen folds, sliding teasingly between them. Your slick glistens in the dim lighting, dripping down down down the lower half of his face. 

And Geto, well, looks like he’s absolutely in heaven. Eyes rolling to the back of his head as he licks at his girl’s pretty cunt, tipping his head back further just to let your sweet juices slide down his throat. 

You’re so focused on how pretty he looks that you almost miss the long fingers deftly snaking their way along your thigh. Spreading your swollen folds apart with his thumbs, he whispers raspily, “Shit. No video in the world can capture how pretty you look like this, love.”

The pure look of admiration has the camera shaking, and you sputtering out, “Wha- Suguru what nonsense-”

“Shhh, my girl. Lemme take care of it.”

And with that he’s sinking knuckle-deep into your pussy, while his ruby lips wrapping around your swollen clit. Zooming in desperately on the way he rolls his tongue harshly along it, sucking so sensually. Like a man starved. 

“Ah- hngh, Sugu. Feel s’good.” you gasp as he starts thrusting his fingers inside you. God, you don’t know how you don’t drop the phone at this point, white-hot jolts of pleasure running up your spine from where Geto was making out so sloppily with your cunt. 

Tears sting your eyes as he curls his fingers just right to brush against that one spot that has you bucking into his mouth for more more more- Hitting it over and over-

Fingers tangling in his silky hair, the video grainy with movement as you use it as leverage to grind deeper into Geto’s face. Chasing your high with an almost-embarrassing neediness. Close. So close. 

A muffled, “Cum f’me, love. Cum for the camera.”

And then you’re cumming. Stars behind your eyes, and Geto’s hungry gaze searing into your brain - and the video - as you chase peak after peak on his pretty face, grinding down desperately. Your vision is hazy, head spinning. 

But Geto’s is decidedly not as he quickly skims through the obscene video, lips still attached with yours. 

Ah, damn these cameras. No matter how high quality, he could never quite capture the delicate trail of drool decorating the corner of your lips. Or the exact pattern of the neat crescents that your nails leave on his chest. 

They could ever quite capture the perfection that was you.

But it’s fine. 

That’s what multiple takes are for, right?

♡ NANAMI KENTO - The photographer

Nanami Kento wasn’t into photography - which didn’t quite explain the tripod and hefty camera set sitting in the corner of his office. 

No, he was more into absolutely fucking ruining you in front of the camera just to capture a semblance of how heavenly you look for him. Which, well, explains the countless framed photographs decorating the walls of his often-locked office. Nothing extremely explicit - but enough to make a stray onlooker blush and look away.

And well, how could you say no? Especially when he had you bent over his desk, leaking tip dragging teasingly along your swollen folds, camera aimed right at the way you lean into his cock. 

Cold tabletop digging into your skin, his fingers warm on your pulsing clit. Drawing tight, methodical little circles. So like him.  

“C’mon, darling. Arch your back more f’me like a good girl.” he murmurs lowly, breath hot against your ear.

As if on autopilot, you press further into his swollen cock. Sliding it deftly between your folds, just aching for any bit of friction. “K-Kento, please-.” you babble, delirious from him and his piercing gaze and him. 

“Mhm, spread your legs more f’me. Yeah, jus’ like that, darling.” he mutters, voice steady with the audacity of someone that wasn’t grinding his rock-hard cock into your dripping cunt. Hips moving in shallow, mindless little motions despite himself. Yet, holding back so agonizingly. 

So, you take matters into your own hands. 

Slowly, purposefully, you lift yourself higher, arching so desperately into Nanami’s throbbing cock. The soft little bump! bump! bump! of him pulsing against your walls a tempo that you were losing your sanity to. And if you were in any better state of mind, you’d be almost embarrassed by how needy you were acting. “Kento! Wan’ you to fuck me alre-”

You don’t get to finish the sentence, because Nanami only takes a second to snap back his hips before pressing into your dripping cunt. The stretch of your walls absolutely addictive.

Click!

Ah, there was the perfect shot. 

All the blood rushes to Nanami’s cock at what showed on the screen - the exact moment that he split you apart on his cock. Your eyes wide, mouth parted ever-so-slightly, such an obscene mixture of shock and ecstacy painted across your face. 

His girl was so beautiful. Especially when she was stuffed full of his cock.

“This is what you wanted, right?”

One hand steady on the camera, the other pulls you deeper onto his cock as Nanami begins to move inside you. Pulling out all the way till his leaking tip is just circling your sloppy entrance - only to ram his length into you mercilessly. 

“My girl wanted to be full of my cock?” he hums darkly, “S’full she can barely even speak?” Hungry eyes devour the way your pretty pussy was milking him so greedily, barely even letting him pull out to fuck back into you harder than before.

“Ah! Yes- hah-” you breathe out, “”Wanted hngh- s’bad-”

He maps every curve and dip of the way you grind down onto his cock, taking in the obscenely heavenly sight of his cock disappearing into your pretty pussy - and so does the camera. 

Click!

Another one - your eyes locked onto Nanami’s. Dripping cunt just barely in the frame as he continues ravaging you from behind. 

Back arched, such a sinful little expression on your face as you buck your hips wildly to meet his thrusts. As frantic as the hasty little movements of his thumb on your throbbing clit - not even circles anymore, just sloppy, sinful motions to get you off. 

“Hah- please Kento,”

Click! Click!

Oh, if Nanami had it his way these photos would decorate every hallway of this house. For everyone to see.

“Wanna- hngh- wanna cum, Kento.” you mewl, ass stinging from where Nanami’s toned pelvis smacked yours at a ceaseless, maddening cadence. Clit now ravaged from both his ruthless abuse and the heavy balls smacking against it with each thrust.

Click! Click! Click! 

“Then cum, darling.”

You see stars behind your eyes as you cum - or maybe that was the unforgiving camera. Capturing each and every detail of the way eyes, dazed and fucked-out, lock onto Nanami’s. Swollen lips dropping into such a pretty oh, Kento! Pushing yourself from the desk on shaky arms to arch so sinfully as Nanami goes over the edge as well. 

Camera shaky for the first time as he twitches inside you savagely, before pumping thick, hot ropes of cum into your quivering walls. Trickling down your legs so lewdly, pooling at the sterile floors below - a problem for later. 

Click!  Ah, another gem for his walls.

♡ CHOSO KAMO - The urgent calls

When Choso video calls you, you know never to answer in public. Why? Well… 

“Cho, what is- Oh.” Your words catch in your throat as you take in the absolutely sinful sight on your screen, cunt clenching in anticipation as you slowly bury deeper into your covers.

Legs spread on the bed, such a pretty blush dusting his face, throbbing erection leaking furiously on his toned abs - your boyfriend was an absolute vision. 

“Baby…” he whines, sending a jolt of pleasure right down to your cunt. “Was missin’ you today.”

Ah, you can’t help but tease him a bit. Raising a brow, “Oh really?” 

Despite his absolutely ravaged state, Choso finds it in himself to scoff, “M’serious. Jus’ thinking about that slutty pink bra you had on today. How much better it would look on my bedroom floor.” 

A large hand makes its way on screen, deftly snaking down his milky skin - down, down down all the way from his abs, resting just at the tufts of black hair at his toned pelvis. Waiting. Teasing. 

Now it was your turn to scoff, pussy twinging impatiently at the way he was so stubbornly waiting for you to break first. Well, two can play that game.

Unbuttoning your shirt slowly - so agonizingly slowly - revealing just a flash of that pink he wanted so bad. That rips a low groan out of Choso, precum smearing on his palm as he squeezes his swollen cock. Success. 

“C’mon now, baby, don’t tease. Be a good girl f’me.”

Batting your lashes mockingly, “You first.”

You always did know how to get what you want, huh? Because with an impatient little grunt, Choso spits a steady stream of saliva once, twice onto his furiously red cock. 

Your mouth waters as he grips the base tight, so achingly hard and flushed your favorite shade of pretty pink. Precum leaking down his glistening veins, pooling at the heavy balls that twitch at the mere sound of your voice as you mutter, “Oh. You really did miss me.”

“Mhm, your turn.” he gets out through a low hiss, desperation bleeding through your speakers and into the heady air. Starting to pull on his cock in shallow, mindless little tugs - just the way you do it.

Finally relenting, you slip off your top, reaching for the clasp behind your when-

“Keep it on. Now spread your pretty legs for me, baby.”

Choso’s greedy eyes are locked on the screen as you flip the camera, showing off your already-soaked panties. Oh, you little minx. 

“Shit. You don’ know what you do to me, baby.” he groans, movements getting jerkier. Fist flying up and down his cock - just wishing his hands were yours. Ah, how yours would be softer, prettier, straining to cup his thick cock. “C’mon now, my girl. Show me you wan’ me just as much.”

God, Choso thinks he could cum right on the spot as you hastily remove your wet panties, delicate trails of slick connecting them to your pretty cunt as you slide it down your legs. Yet, he manages to find it in himself to grit out a low, “Touch yourself the way I would, baby.”

And, well, you don’t need to be told twice. 

Bullying your fingers through your swollen folds, thumb just grazing your throbbing clit. Purposefully teasing yourself - purposefully not giving in to what you craved so bad. No, you were too entranced with what was onscreen. 

With the way Choso was fucking his fist so desperately. Like he was trying to fuck something delicious out. Harder on the base, featherlight on his flushed head. Thumb teasing under the slit just the way you would.

“Shit- Oh, baby,” Choso groans, his hips bucking wildly as if he could somehow close the distance between you. His grip on his cock almost painful as he pounds into his hand. Ah, how you wish that was your hand instead.

Your fingers dip lower, rubbing your entrance. A thrill running through you at the way Choso’s eyes widen as you slide a finger inside yourself with a whine of his name. 

“Need you here with me, need to feel you around me,” you pant, rubbing against your clit in time with his fist, eyes locked on the way his throbbing cock twitches in his hands at the mere sound of your voice. Palm running up and down up and-

“Choso, just come here an’ fuck me already.”

You catch a glimpse of his eyes flickering closed, breath slowing, a satisfied smile curling his lips and then- thick spurts of cum covering his toned abs. Glistening so deliciously in the dim lighting as Choso strokes himself through his high. 

You on the other hand…

“Cho~ Can’t cum without you here.”  you hum coyly, slightly whiny yet not desperate - not yet.

“Get ready, baby. M’gonna be there in five.” Ah, how you loved when Choso video calls you.

♡ GOJO SATORU - The wallpaper fiend

Gojo Satoru loved to show off his wallpaper, babbling about his “beautiful girlfriend” as he flashed the picture to any and everyone he came across. 

It wasn’t anything strange, really - just a slightly blurry photo of the upper half of your head, eyes slightly scrunched like you were in the depths of laughter. It’s only when someone stares too hard, finger pressing just a bit too long that Gojo snatches back his phone with an unreadable little smirk. 

Because if they had they’d notice it was a live wallpaper. 

One that - despite being so proudly the great Gojo Satoru’s wallpaper - was for only his eyes to see. One where the camera shifts ever-so-slightly downwards to show you splayed out deliciously on your mattress, pale, sculpted thighs straddling your face - zooming in on the way your swollen lips bulge wraps so lewdly around his throbbing cock. 

“Oh, sweetheart, jus’ look at you.” his voice rumbles from above, voice hoarse with desire. “Taking my cock so well, huh?”

All he gets are muffled groans, tears glistening in your eyes as Gojo shoves his length deeper down your throat. He chuckles lightly, fucking into your hot mouth in small grinds of his hips, “Oh yeah, forgot you can’t speak sweetheart.”

Ah, what a smug bastard. And despite the dick lodged in your throat, you find it in yourself to stare up defiantly into his greedy gaze, moaning sinfully around him. That makes that confident facade crumble a little, the camera is shaky as Gojo lets out a broken little, “Sh-shit. You’re really asking for it.”

And maybe you were a mastermind - maybe you were an idiot. Because Gojo pulls his hips back till his leaking tip is just kissing your kiss-bitten lips. Smearing his precum around your glossy mouths. Only to slam back into you mercilessly, forcing you to relax your throat - because Gojo’s had enough of playing game

His searing grip on your scalp just out of the frame as he fucks into your mouth like his personal toy. Not stopping till your nose is pressed into the snowy white tufts of hair at his pelvis. 

Camera scrambling to capture the way your throat bulges so obscenely as he fills you up, starting to fuck into you in shallow, mindless little thrusts. “Mmm, ngh. Fuck, sweetheart. Can feel me inside you right…” A large, veiny hand makes its way into the video as it wraps around your throat, squeezing. Tight. “...here.” Gojo rasps over your choked-up moans. 

Tears were streaming down your face now, nails digging desperately into the hand wrapped around your throat. But it seems Gojo had no care in the world for them. Because he coos mockingly, “Awww, don’ cry, sweetheart. Jus’ look at that slutty mouth of yours, sucking the fucking soul out of me.”

And as the screen grows grainier, the camerawork more shaky - Gojo’s hips grow more frantic. 

Cock hitting the back of your throat at a maddening cadence in a way he wishes the camera could pick up. Hand tightening around your throat as he fucks into you faster and deeper. Hip chasing the feeling of your tongue wrapped so deliciously around his throbbing cock. Delicately tracing the veins along the side, flicking his sensitive slit just the way you know he likes. Over and over-

The screen flashes white - or maybe that was just Gojo’s cum. Shooting thick, endless spurts of his seed that paint your pretty face white. And oh, this was his favorite part, how you take it so well. 

Your tongue darting out to catch the stream of cum that gushes out of him, pooling it on your tongue before letting it slide to the back of your throat. Eyes gazing up so eagerly into his as you stick your tongue out to show, well, nothing. Taking him up so greedily. 

And if Gojo was any less of a man, he’d be showing this off to everyone he knew. And in the end, before the wallpaper goes back to that seemingly innocent picture of your face - if he turned up the volume real high - Gojo could hear his voice in the background, breathing out through ragged gasps. “C’mon, sweetheart, I wanna make a few more wallpapers.”

A/N. LMAO this came to me when I thought about how Gojo is the type to have a polaroid of your tits behind his phone case. 

Plagiarism not authorized.

[goryhorroor]

this needs to be addressed because this annoyed me. i hate when people say: "classic horror films suck because they're not scary." i need to put this in perspective. let's take a silent horror film for one; nosferatu might not be frightening to modern watchers because it wasn't made for this generation or generations in the 80s either, so you won't find it scary because they're relying on tactics that will terrify the audiences who lived in the 20s. I mean they didn’t have talking in films yet so they had to rely on other things.

you also have to take in account that the internet did not exist to these people, so yea a lot of people today have seen some gory things and are desensitized to some of the horror shown in these classic horror films, that doesn't make it a bad horror film that you were not terrified by it. not to mention horror is subjective anyways.

even further back, house of the devil is 1000% not scary to anyone today, but in the 1890s all this technology advancing was terrifying to them. like the use of appearing and disappearing on screen is very simple to do nowadays and some people won't find it scary, but for people in that era it was fucking terrifying because this technology didn’t exist out in the public so freely.

the exorcist, I’ve come to seen that to modern day watchers don’t find it scary (I’m not saying everybody but there’s a new influx people who are saying this stuff and I mean a lot of people) , but they never had people from the 2000s-2020s in mind when they were making the film. they weren't saying "ooh we need to make sure it's scary to people in the future." no they knew their audiences in the 70s was either overly religious or not religious whatsoever and a movie using religion as a form of terror, got people in those seats.

people that say "horror movie classics are terrible because they're not scary," bother the hell out of me. horror is all about it’s context!

[wwilsonbarness]

hello? Mr. Pickle?

pairings:  bucky barnes x reader

summary: Bucky struggles with modern technology, especially autocorrect. 

warnings: none, pure fluff 

word count: 495

a/n: When I was writing i can’t do this anymore my autocorrect changed doll to dill and so this was born - also my first drabble? Huge thanks to @hopelessromantic423 for the title suggestion <33

Feedback, likes and reblogs are much appreciated :) 

I do not give permission for my work to be copied, reposted or translated on any other platform.

masterlist 

From across the room you could hear your phone vibrating so you made a mental note to check it once you finish this chapter of your book. It buzzed again and you debated going over to it but you only had two pages left. Then it buzzed 3 more times, straight after each other. This was when you decided it must be important so you got up and started walking over. It buzzed another two times as you walked over and you started to panic, it could’ve been an emergency. When you saw the messages on your screen you couldn’t help but burst into laughter. It was Bucky who was messaging you. 

Buck

I’m just leaving. What do you want for dinner dill?  dill** dill** This stupid fucking phone. DILL** DILL DILL** Fuck sake I’m phoning you 

You only just finish reading the last message when your phone begins to ring and you try to compose your laughter enough to answer. 

“Hey Buck, or should I say Mr Pickle?” 

“Ha Ha.” He replies sarcastically, “I take it you seen my texts. Stupid phone never works.” 

“It’s just not used to your 40’s lingo babe.” You teased, you were always kidding with him about how much of an old man he was. Not in the way of his literal age but the way he lived, he hated using new technology, he hated social media, and you don’t even want to think back on the time you tried to make him watch a reality show. He tried liking all the modern parts of the world but he missed the old days where things were a lot simpler. He was just glad he had you to help him through it. 

“Yeah well it’s lucky I didn’t throw it out the car.” You hear him mumble something along the lines of “piece of crap” and it makes you giggle. “It’s not funny doll.” 

“It’s kinda funny.” 

“I hate you.” He jokes. 

“No you don’t.” You manage to reply through your laughter. 

“You’re right I don’t. So what do you want for dinner?”

You take a second to think, “I’m kinda craving cheeseburgers.” 

“I could do a cheeseburger, I’m near that burger place anyways.” 

“Could you get some fries too? Oh! And a milkshake? The one with the oreo pieces? Please.” He couldn’t see but your pouty lip had come out. 

“Anything you want doll.” 

“Thanks babe, how long do you think you’ll be?”

“Should be like 20 minutes, do you wanna watch something while we eat?” 

“You read my mind! I’ll set it up in time for you coming home.” 

“Okay, won’t be long. Love you.” 

“Love you too.” Bucky’s about to hang up before you quickly start speaking again. “Bucky?” 

“Yeah?” 

“Could you get me extra pickles on my burger?” 

You hear him scoff a little then laugh, “I’m hanging up now.” 

“Byeee.” You trail off until the call ends. You were never gonna let him live this one down.

[idlerin]

PHANTASMA

a haikyuu social media modern fantasy au

pairing. miya atsumu x f!reader

synopsis. someone was trying to kill miya atsumu. you don’t know who, well, what exactly was going to try and suck the life out of him (probably quite literally). what you do know is that you have to protect him—bound by oath and protocol—whether you liked it or not. out of everyone in campus, you just had to be assigned to the most arrogant and obnoxious of the bunch. this wasn’t your first rodeo but it was going to be the first pain in the ass.

tags. social media au, college au, modern fantasy au, horror (slight), comedy (yes, uhm hopefully), romance is a subplot (bc this is gonna be mostly plot-ish heavy, mostly world building and will include lots of side characters), forced proximity, atsumu is a piece of shit, you hate each other !

warnings. i cant think of much, graphic descriptions? (bc supernaturals n stuff), time stamps arent important !

status. on-going (06/19/24 —)

may the inferno bless you,

00. defend and protect

01. conflict of interest

02. im watching you

03. stalker freak

04.

05.

tba !

taglist is OPEN ! [slots taken: 20/50]

to be added to the taglist you can just send in an ask or comment :)

notes. so this is like such an experiment lmao but i wanted to try mixing the social media and modern fantasy aspect ! so the story will be told in images and through a phone (crazy technology) i will cheat sometimes and use phone calls tho heheheeheh. anyways love sick will be the priority still this is my silly little side project inspired by my fav manga (tbhk) and the book ninth house (i use the term gray from there). fun fact abt me is i read mostly fantasy books but im a romance writer lol.

themes inspired by tbhk and ninth house is not mine but the overall content of this smau is. please do not repost this on any other platform. © idlerin 2024

[weebsinstash]

we talked about a Dog Reader, so now I'm thinking about a Reader who's an object head, specifically a piece of tech like Vox and I'm leaning heavily towards a Computer Darling with a computer monitor head who has different technological abilities, but, anyways, here's a bunch of mixed Alastor and/or Vox with a Computer Darling ideas

- Computer Darling who actually has Big Dysmorphia over not having a human-like form anymore and thinks they're actually ugly but Vox thinks you're totally perfect

- you know how Alastor was friends with the original, old Vox who had his old head and was older tech. I think about how when I was growing up, the computers were those big clunky desktop dialup ones, and I just think of a Darling who, for whatever reason, can change their appearance and is anxious of letting other people see they have a big ass dinosaur computer monitor head, just some bigass square heavy bullshit, and Alastor finds out and you're worried he's gonna judge you and it's like. He ALSO thinks you're extremely adorable

-I just really like the idea of a Computer Darling warming Alastor up to certain aspects of tech and the internet, because it's about the utility that's important. You could just start ADHD rambling about all the cool things you've learned over the years and he's over here, kicking his feet looking at you being so cute and excited ^^ you're over here with stars in your eyes talking about all the wonders and opportunities there out with different inventions and science and, things like, oh my gosh Alastor recently Japan hollowed out an entire fucking mountain and filled it with a special fluid where they could monitor these things called neutrinos which are like these extremely important microscopic particles that could fundamentally change our understanding of the universe-- like you know what I mean? He loves your passion and excitement, you're just so adorable to him when you start rambling, he could listen to you talk for hours and ask all sorts of questions and he can tell it makes you really happy 🥺❤️

- I just like the idea of like. Computer Reader could all but dive into the internet and be on it in their own head kinda a la Ghost In The Shell or like, Cyberpunk Edgerunners, you can just connect to tech and control it and learn new things over time. But most importantly, maybe Reader does some, dramatic theatrical thing where, you hate your actual Sinner body and you find out how to make and pilot a completely different one. Like Alastor meets you out on the street as this person with hair and skin and horns or something, you know, demonic but still human, and he finds out you're basically like, blutoothing it from inside your closet back at home. You're piloting clones like that guy from Frieren. You somehow managed to technomancy some bullshit together to make a fake robot body because you hate having your big dumb square head and no nose or hair or anything. But then Alastor or Vox eventually finds out your true identity and they never want to see your fake double ever again

-I keep thinking of. The potential body horrors in a robot Darling that stacks on top of Hazbin's specific setting and premises. These two could literally disassemble you. They could easily detach limbs. You wouldn't die, ever. And I'm not saying they would like, butcher or torture you but in thriller or horror sort of contexts, think about these sorts of things: Vox who can restrain you and forcibly plug different cords into the ports on your body and suddenly he can "access the files" of your body and memories. He can install certain things inside of you that you can't overpower or remove without having some sort of password or debugging. Alastor who decides he doesn't want you modernizing any of your body parts (like Vox did) and forces you to stay in a body you might hate. Alastor who DOWN GRADES your tech because he either thinks you're online too much or he thinks it's ruining you somehow. Alastor with a computer Darling and Vox is hostile to you and winds up hacking into you and Alastor is forced to downgrade your tech to protect you, but he also likes how this entire situation has made you more trusting and dependent on him

-people use this for Vox a lot and I think it would be cute, or also maybe potentially narratively dramatic, if Reader when they're sleeping sometimes had parts of their dreams play on their screen-face while they're asleep. Nothing like the yandere who is peeping on you while you snooze getting to see extremely intimate looks inside your head! Any nightmares about your childhood, perhaps? Any violent urges? How unhinged and degenerate are you when given free reign? I mostly just think of nightmare drama, though. Like imagine Alastor or Vox spending time with you as either like a friend or a new partner or whatever and you guys have a really nice fun day together and that same night they see you having a super vivid nightmare of them rejecting you and mocking you and it's just so detailed and real and AWFUL, they either wake you up or you wake up yourself and you're clearly affected by it, not really wanting to see them or talk to them, and they're left wondering how often you're having these nightmares

- personally I think there's some real potential for Vox to be Big Creepy because like, you can text him WITH your body, send him emails inside of your head, you can store files amd create programs and animations and songs inside of yourself and upload the files or send them to people, so you can LITERALLY do every yandere's dream of "something that was inside of you is now inside of them"

-I think of Computer/Tech Darling having blutooth tech in their home like a radio or TV and you like to connect to them to make music or entertain yourself or "do a bit". Like imagine if you were in a relationship with Vox and something bad happens to him, maybe Valentino makes fun of him right on the air or something, and he's all but racing to your apartment after work because you're like the ONE solace he has and you do some shit like, he's sitting down on the couch and the TV turns on and it's "an extra special investigative report on how cool the Television Demon is" and the display is you dressed up as a news anchor asking other versions of you out on the street what they think of Vox of the Vees and by the time the "segment" is over he's ready to cry because like??? It's been so long since he's felt genuinely appreciated and supported??? Vox who becomes super yandere for Reader because you're like the ONE person who makes him feel wanted and gave him kindness when he needed it--

- Tech Darling who is poly with Alastor and Vox and whenever you want to annoy Alastor you just start playing dubstep or some shit, and whenever you're mad at Vox, you do some, fake ass "radio broadcast" about how the Television Demon is "a no-good, conniving canoodling cretin and that the RADIO DEMON is the cat's pajamas-" like you'll try and do bits that align with the time periods they're from and their interests and, I just like the idea of a Reader who, maybe through the red string soulmate trope, is resistant to being in a relationship with one let alone both of them so you're trying to make them fight by playing favorites and they just think it's absolutely adorable. Like YES QUEEN I'm sure transforming into clothes from their time period to sarcastically make fun of them isn't going to make then start brainstorming what other clothes including wedding dresses they would like to see you in, go OFF honey

[synergysilhouette]

"Batman: Caped Crusader" review

Binge-watched this show, and I wanted to be one of many people to share my thoughts on this--plus I was spurred on by getting a wish of mine granted from the show. Make sure to check out the show if you can!

The animation is beautiful--I know this is a weird comparison, but soemthing about the animation reminds me of 2010s Scooby Doo animated films, and I kind of adore that.

The voice acting was...fine--I can't tell if it was poor performances or poor direction; Hamish's Bruce Wayne sounds too raspy/rugged some of the time, like he's still playing Batman, and many of the other actors felt like they were just reading lines rather than performing lines, not enough emotion. IDK if they're more used to live-action work, but voice-acting is a different ballgame, since your voice is all you have to convey the character. A lot of performances fell flat for me, but it wasn't 100% unbearable, just underwhelming. I have some people I'd recommend instead (both familiar to the role and otherwise), but I don't wanna start anything.

LOVED Harley (but not her costume)--Jamie Chung had one of the better performances in the group, and I really LOVED the angle they did for Harley; I feel like the media often flanderizes her as the goofy crazy chick, so seeing her actually utilize her psychology skills (like I've been asking for!) is so satisfying. That said, the outfit has GOT TO GO. Gold and black is gorgeous, but it ples in comparison to her black and red look. And a weird nit-pick; when I first saw the stills, I was under the impression she was wearing a carnival-esque mask rather than face paint, and I find that idea a lot creepier. I wish we'd gotten more of Harley's antics--and even seeing her get close to Bruce in the way she did with Barbara and Renee--before revealing her as a big bad to the public. And I appreciate that she isn't 100% evil; she is doing what she believes is a noble cause, just doing it in an illegal and unethical way. I needed a backstory!

Not enough Batman--Maybe it's just me, but it definitely felt like there were some episodes where Bruce and Batman were supporting characters and more focus was on the GCPD. While I don't mind it too much, I enjoy superhero shows for the superheroes, not the heroes; this is why I had a love/hate relationship with "Gotham."

Batman (and Bruce) isn't quite likeable enough--In earlier incarnations, Batman was more kind and caring before becoming more emotionally closed off with time, but here he's that way from the get-go. Not to mention that Bruce Wayne puts on a facade around everyone, even people he trusts (he probably did that anyway; I can't remember), and his session with Harleen really frustrated me because I don't expect his walls to come down immediately, I don't expect them to be this high this early. I wanted him to be a bit warmer and transparent, rather than curt and cold like he's usually seen in the show. I feel like this is an issue often seen in comics, too; people prioritize Batman's "coolness" and thus push his feelings to the wayside.

Using underrated and familiar villains--I'm sure the real experts are gonna chew me out for this one, but as someone who got into comics in the 2010s and didn't catch up on the acclaimed 90s series, it was fun to see villains I loved and villains I didn't know; one of the best things a popular property can do is use underrated characters, since it helps the show feel original and fresh (thus why "Teen Titans" is so enjoyable; the whole franchise is underrated).

Too modern for the 1940s--I can't put my fingers on it exactly, but the vibes feel too modern; I assume the 1940s was for aesthetics, but since everything else feels updated (from the way people talk to Harley and Renee seemingly being open about their feelings for each other), I don't think it was a wise choice to have it both ways. I see no reason not to have it in modern-day, but I suppose you'd have to get more creative with technology.

Barbara and the Robins--First off, I should've gambled with someone that Jason would be a redhead; I'd have made SO MUCH money. Secondly, I'm not crazy about how all four kids are orphans; If I recall correctly, both Carrie and Stephanie's parents were alive when they joined the Batfamily. In any case, I'm confused on why Barbara is significantly older than them when they're all supposed to be within the same age bracket (I think; someone has told me otherwise since posting this, so I could be wrong). Not to mention, a part of me worries that because of the quartet's young ages and Barbara getting so much screentime as a lawyer, we won't get any of them as Robins or Batgirls unless something drastic happens, and/or we get a time jump.

Overall, I think my biggest gripes are the voice acting and how Batman/Bruce Wayne is written. That said, I enjoyed the show overall. IDK why HBO Max dropped it. Hopefully season 2 will introduce Poison Ivy, Catman, Tim Drake, Ghostmaker, and Gardener, since the finale already showed us a certain someone who IS coming to Gotham.

[oh-no-its-bird]

Some Cardcaptor Sakura stuff ended up on my dash and now I'm thinking about a classic magical girl au. Magical girl Izuna my beloved,,

Has anyone done that yet? Am I going to have to be the one to do that? I'm totally going to have to be that guy aren't I. You know what tho, I think I'm ok with that

Alright;

✨️ Magical girl Izuna time ✨️

I think one or the biiju should be his animal mascot / contractor. Kurama is the obvious choice but Matatabi could be fun, and also like, cmon, fire cat.

Alternatively though in a totally different direction, maybe Amaterasu can be the contractor. It could both play into Uchiha lore and also have some shit about his power coming from the rising sun with his magical girl transformation. Maybe he gets stronger the higher the sun is in the sky, and then weaker at night to the point that he can barley even transform. Maybe the villain of this hypothetical magical girl show could be contracted by Kaguya, and get stronger with the moon in contrast.

Fun scene where despite it being night, he's able to transform because of sun lamps or some conviniently placed solar pannels or smthn.

Maybe the villain of that episode was depending on tech or something, so he gets to shout some quippy line about how "Oh yeah don't you just LOVE the wonders of modern technology!" Before fucking bludgeoning them to death with a magical girl staff or whatever his weapon is

Anyways, set it in vaguely highschool because this shit is always set in a school and I wanna have fun hitting all the tropes.

It acts on a "monster/villain of the week" system with some big shadowy bad guy apparently pulling the strings behind the curtains. The monsters are all existing people or animals, "corrupted by the shadow of the moon" or something along those lines. The moon promises them power to fulfill their wishes but then the wish will inevitably go wrong or the power will be too much for the person, corrupting them.

Izuna uses the power of Amaterasu's light and violence to purify whatever person/animal and return them to normal. Only some people are harder and sometimes require some good old power of friendship yelling to get through to them (this does not stop Izuna from usually just defaulting to violence tho)

Amaterasu lore dumps on him that they must be being corrupted by the power of Kaguya-hime, who was sealed away over a thousand years ago. And that with each monster made, she must grow closer to fully escaping. Which is why it's important that Izuna purify these people as fast as possible, to make sure that Kaguya doesn't receive power from their contratracts with her.

In the meanwhile, they need to brainstorm a way to put Kaguya back in her prison if she escapes. Because if she continues corrupting people for their energy, unless Izuna finds out how she's able to communicate with them from her prison, she will escape.

I want Hikaku as the token best friend who's let in on the magical girl secret (maybe by accident at first) and helps from the sidelines despite having no real power (he's the one who would have pulled in clutch with those solar pannels / sun lamps)

Tobirama can be the classic "ice prince" character who Izuna kind of hates and has a stupid rivalry with that usually seems one sided; Till he manages to rile up Tobirama enough to bite back

Touka as a foil to Hikaku but for Tobirama, acting as his best friend and occasional pain in the ass for both him and Izuna (she thinks Izuna is hilarious and that the stress migraine he causes Tobirama is good for him)

Seemingly clueless Madara and Hashirama, who turn out to be the reincarnations of the guys who originally sealed Kaguya away. They've both just graduated and seem to be too busy entering the adult world to notice Izuna getting caught up in magic shenanigans

School princess and shrine maiden Mito, who's ancestor was someone who helped to seal Kaguya, and who's family shrine still contains some hints at how they did it.

Itama as that one specific trope of a really sickly guy who everyone at school is always gossiping about, and who Tobirama is wayyy overprotective of.

Izuna, Hikaku, Touka and Tobirama are all in the kendo club. Hashirama and Madara were kendo champions and rivals before they graduated and now Izuna and Tobirama seem to be taking up their mantles.

So, Izuna is defeating new moon-mad monsters every week. A lot of them seem to pop up in conviniently nearby places, but he's no closer to finding out how Kaguya supposedly gets in contact with them.

As his adventures progress, he sometimes catches the coat tails of a mysterious other magical girl, but magic prevents him from remembering their face. But they'll appear and help out when he's in a really bad situation, and he sometimes catches them just watching. Suspicious!! But they're too fast for him to ever pin down for a real conversation.

Anyways; Eventually it seems like the monster of this week is going to be a steadily growing tense and unstable Tobirama. Izuna had started to learn the signs of oncoming moon-madness, and he can sense Kaguya's power eating away at him. He swoops in just in time as he sees the power start to consume Tobirama, only to watch as he's somehow able to fight back and regain control.

Still, Izuna will do his due diligence and burn the power away before it can turn him!

Tobirama does not seem to appreciate this. At all.

Queue identity reveal! Only not on Izuna's end.

So, the first twist in our story is that Tobirama ends up being the bad guy.

Flashback some months ago to when this all started:

Tobirama somehow stumbled on Kaguya where she was sealed away. Just like how Amaterasu can only interact with the real world through Izuna, without a magical girl contracted to her to act as her hands, Kaguya could do nothing to escape. So when Tobirama found her, she was immediatley readying her pitch; promising him power, knowledge, all sorts of things if he just helped to set her free. Even offering to bring back his dead brothers.

Though... well, Kaguya's power was fickle. All gods powers are. Amaterasu was only able to contract Izuna without exploding him with the heat of the sun because he was already born one of her children. And Tobirama isn't Kaguya's to claim, which means he ran the risk of getting fucking vaporized or corrupted or going crazy if he accepted the contract.

But with the promise of bringing his brothers back on the table, he wasn't about to say no. And maybe it was through sheer fucking stubbornness, but he was able to handle it. Kind of. He's managing.

(Which is why Izuna can't just purify him with Amaterasu's light or by talking him down, like he does with every moon-mad monster he fights. He's not possessed like they are, he's a proper countracted magical girl, just like Izuna)

Tobirama was able to bring back Itama and give Kaguya some more freedom behind her seal, but still mostly locked away as she was, Kaguya didn't have the power to bring back Kawarama as well, and Itama was brought back weaker than he'd died as.

Which is when Tobirama took matters into his own hands.

He began approaching other people, much like Kaguya had approached him. Offering them contracts with Kaguya on her behalf— only they turned out to not be able to hold on to the contracts like he could. Being corrupted or going mad and becoming moon-posessed. Still, each contract he made added to Kaguya's power and brought her a little closer to escaping her seal. (And closer to giving Tobirama his last brother back)

(And hey, with Izuna keeping the damage to a minimum and helping purify the people after, Tobirama didn't have to feel as guilty about the damage he was causing)

(Still though, when it looked like Izuna was struggling, he'd try to pitch in. Or when a person made an especially desperate wish or had a specific goal to fulfill with their contract, he'd try his best to help with that. If only as an apology)

But stubbornness wasn't enough to keep him safe from the sharp edges of Kaguya's power forever, and as time passed and the more contracts he made and power he gathered for Kaguya, the more he began to risk being consumed himself.

Which leads back to the here and now, with Tobirama assuming that since Izuna attacked, he'd been made. And Izuna first being really fucking confused, then really fucking concerned, then really fucking mad.

They fight, Tobirama gets away, and the next day Izuna gets to experience the most painful school day of his fucking life. Starting with the realization that, while he can recognize Tobirama since he saw him transform, Tobirama doesn't actually know Izuna is the magical girl

Interlude:

Izuna: What the fuck why did he get a wish when he became a magical girl, I want a wish why the fuck didn't I get one

Amaterasu: :3

Izuna: AND PANTS?? WHY DOES HE GET PANTS???

Amaterasu: teehee <3

Izuna: Don't you fucking teehee me right now

Tobirama, knowing he's going to lose himself to Kaguya's power and aware that a) he's come too far there's no backing out now, and b) he's ok with losing himself if it means he can at least bring Kawarama back, decides to go full throttle. Skips all his classes and dissapears to go do shady shit behind the scenes as he massively moves up the time table for setting Kaguya free

He's already losing himself, might as well pump more power into people to create bigger, badder monsters— getting Kaguya even more power and putting even more strain on himself

This is about when Touka finds out what's happening with him, and decides she's ok with embracing the morally gray lifestyle for her bestie. She gets Tobirama to agree that once Kawarama is back, hes ending this shit for good. But till then, well, she always did tell him she'd have his back no matter what. Now she gets to parallel Hikaku even more!!! Yay!!!

Queue final battle time! Kaguya is on the very edge of escape and funneling more power into Tobirama than ever! Tobirama is either about to explode from the inside out or turn into a whole moon monster, it's unclear but he is this fucking close to losing it all. Quite literally, actually.

Touka gets to have a teeny bit of Kaguya's power for this battle, knowing the fight would be short enough and that she has enough self discipline to not immediatley go moon-mad.

She gets to face off with Hikaku, who gets his kendo sword blessed by Amaterasu so he can fight back against her moon powers.

It's all very dramatic and Tobirama gets to fully break out of his ice prince shell as he and Izuna scream and beat the shit out of eachother.

Im thinking that no matter what happens, Kaguya still gets free in the end and it's revealed that actually she and Amaterasu are like, bitter exes and this whole thing was a fucking lovers spat

Season 2 is just 20 episodes of Izuna being mad at Amaterasu as she and Kaguya make out passionately in the bg

Kidding. Probably. Idk I'm having a lot of thoughts rn, there's a shape of something to continue the magical girl train but I need to go do work shit so I'll leave this here for now and come back to it later

[shootingmorningstar]

Anon, I am so sorry .ᐟ I accidentally posted your request wayyyyy too early and had to delete it .ᐟ That being said, thank you so much .ᐟ My favorite part of writing is getting to see it resonate with others, so comments like these really make my day. Anyways, let me just say that I love this rq. You're right, that's such a funny scenario.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀Alastor With a Vee!Reader .ᐟ

You hadn't expected to climb the ranks at Voxtek. Really, you hadn't. You started off as nothing more than one of the many assistants Vox seems to get off by yelling at. Just another spineless sinner that would probably end up selling their soul to one of the three overlords, more than likely your boss.

That is exactly how your friendship with Alastor started out, actually. It wasn't too often you got a day off -- there isn't exactly any form of worker protection in hell -- so you were delighted to be able to take a stroll through Pentagram City. Maybe you could buy a new dress, or even stop by Rosie's Emporium .ᐣ Any hopes you'd had of a nice peaceful day were dashed, however, by your boss' face lighting up your cellphone.

Ugh, he was calling you .ᐣ Really, on your one day off .ᐣ Nevermind, of course he was. It seems you signed away your right to any peace the moment you became an employee under the VoxTek name.

Answering it with a simple ❛ how can I help you, sir .ᐣ ❜ had resulted in a frustrated yell so loud it resembled the high pitched screech two electronic devices echoed when forced near each other. He wasted no time in telling you a report you hadn't even written was absolute garbage and that you needed to come in and fix it now.

Or, at least, that's what you assume he was going to say. He'd gotten no farther than ❛ in ❜ before a shadow crept up on your phone, promptly ending the call.

Confused, you spin around to see Alastor. The Radio Demon, one of the most powerful sinners to ever be sent to Hell . . . . had ended your phone call .ᐣ

Now you were even more confused. You knew both Alastor and Vox despised each other -- that much had been made clear a little bit after the second to last extermination with your bosses power play becoming a duet.. battle .ᐣ

That much was public information but why in Hell's name would he ever interfere with a phone call .ᐣ He hated modern technology. You're spared from your confusion, though, when a staticky voice crackles to life in front of you. ❛ Why on Earth would you ever allow him to speak to you in that manner, dear .ᐣ ❜

From that day forward you began to see Alastor more and more, each time with a new piece of advice he had to offer you on dealing with such a terrible boss. It was absolutely orchestrated on Alastor's part, but either you didn't realize or just couldn't bring yourself to care. What you absolutely realize, though is that Alastor's advice is working. Each little bit of information he gives you dives a little bit deeper on how to deal with Vox -- how to actually have a backbone against his outrageous demands.

Fearing one day that you might push back just a little too hard and be met with the lethal force of an angry Overlord, Alastor gives you a tiny, what appears to be hand carved wooden radio. Your fear is warranted and he knows it -- you wouldn't be the first VoxTek employee to end as nothing more than a written off casualty. The idea is simple ; speak the demon's name into his namesake if any of the Vee's put you in danger and he would come to your aid.

The little trinket acts as a security blanket. From that day forward you tell Vox what you think of his ideas and where exactly he can shove the piles of paperwork he didn't feel like doing and rather pushed to you.

And Vox is impressed. You can't speak to him the way you do without being Velvette or Valentino. He doesn't know whether you're spunky or foolish, but he decides he doesn't care which. He also decides you're wasted as a secretary. In no time you're rising the ranks, going from secretarial supervisor, managing the entire office, all the way to Vox's personal assistant, making yourself known as VoxTek's rising star.

As his assistant, you find yourself attending meetings with the other Vee's often -- and to your surprise, they like you. Especially Velvette. Enough to demand Vox to share.

That's how you became a member of one of the most feared groups in Hell, the newest Vee, their underdog assistant. You take on responsibilities from all three of them, keeping them running smoothly.

All the while you're finding time to go out with Alastor for tea and a stroll through Cannibal Town. He usually despises physical contact, so you can't seem to understand why he wrapped his arm around your waist as you walked .ᐣ

What you hadn't seen was the sinner with their phone out, camera pointed at you and ready to snap a shot of Hell's newest Vee hanging out with their sworn enemy. The picture explodes on social media before Vox can get it under control, and before he knows it it's being reposted to Sinstagram twice for every one he deletes. He's outraged, calling you and demanding an answer. Alastor has long thought of this, though -- so as the two of you planned, he pretends to walk away, leaving the view of the cameras Vox is undoubtedly watching you on before using his magic to cut them off.

It's then you explain that you'd befriended the Radio Demon 'for the Vee's' in hopes of 'gaining intel to sabotage him and his Hotel.' It's a lie, but it appeals to Vox's sense of hatred for Alastor enough to slip by undetected. The idea of finding out his enemies secrets thrills him, actually.

Continuing your friendship has never been easier. Occasionally, you'll ask Alastor an overly intrusive question, he'll reply with a falsehood and you both try not to snicker as you try to act like you're trying to go behind his back to report the answer to Vox.

To be honest . . . Velvette and Valentino don't really seem to care half as much about Alastor as Vox does. They're very interested in the power felling him would bring them and so your fake spy mission does please them, but seeing you beside him didn't really send them into a frenzy like it does Vox. Velvette makes a comment about you trying to get him to change -- ❛ seriously, I know the cunt's all about avoiding cameras, but has he got to avoid mirrors, too .ᐣ that cane went out of style before radio .ᐟ ❜ and that's the end of it.

Alastor had intended you to serve as a tool against the Vee's from the very start, but I think he genuinely does enjoy your company. Sure, most of his motivations are self driven and semi-sociopathic at times, but he isn't incapable of making genuine bonds. His friendship with Rosie seems to be strong, and he's at the least fond of Mimzy and Niffty.

It surprises him regardless. He doesn't even have to be sneaky about his true intentions to you -- you know what he wants and gladly comply all the while enjoying his company. I imagine he enjoys having someone to dish into all of the Vee's shortcomings with, too.

The way I personally interpret this dynamic is platonic, but if it were to step into romantic territory, Alastor would need to be the one to approach it. He has little to no romantic desires or attraction, so I think any sort of confession would be a major turn-off from him. He wouldn't react well to others feelings being pushed onto him. However, if he were to bring it up, you're plenty patient enough to wait while he figures things out. You dealt with Vox's verbal abuse for years, this is lightwork in comparison.

Platonic or romantic doesn't matter, what does is the excitement you get when Alastor picks you up from work at VoxTek HQ and the amusement you share when you hear the sound of a monitor shattering from Vox's office.

If you were ever to be found out and stripped of your title, you have an ally and friend in Alastor, and that's by far the most meaningful thing to come from your work.

Hi, hi .ᐟ Another post out. I've been thinking on this rq ever since I got it and I think this is a good way to both show how evil and manipulative Alastor can be while also having fun. Alastor is a character that is so hard, at least to me, to keep in character while doing x r.eaders. I hope this sits well with any Alastor stans reading this .ᐟ

As always, let me know what you think .ᐟ Hearing back from you guys keeps me writing. Enjoy ♡ .ᐟ

[lightparty-fullparty]

Can't possibly be me Zenosposting again - what is this a day ending in Y?

Anyway, I've been thinking about the murder boy again. This has mostly spawned from my replaying of the Stormblood patches and seeing Amnesiac Yotsuyu, which sparked a bit of a Nature vs Nuture debate between me and my friends.

Basically, my question for this post is "How much of Zenos' whole deal is Nature (aka He was just born like that) and how much of it is Nuture (aka the enviornment he grew up). Some of you might content to say Nature and leave it at that, which is a completely valid outlook to have. But for me there's just one... teeny... tiny... little detail that has sent me on a wild consipriacy theory of a ride that's resulted in this post. Emet-FUCKING-Selch.

Listen to me, listen okay? I cannot, CANNOT ignore the fact that this absoulete motherfucker (affectionate) is Zenos's cannonical Great Grandfather. Who was very much alive and kicking during his childhood. Emet-Selch or Solus zos Galvus whatever moniker you wanna give the man, is an Ascian. One of THE Ascians. Not only that, he's 'The Architect" the guy who's job it is to design and engineer the calamities meant to rejoin the Shards of the World back together again. What does he do to achieve this? He builds empires, he starts wars, manipulates people and situations to result in untold elemental chaos. Iirc correctly he's responsible for causing all eight calamities that have occured so far in FFXIV. (Eight got undone but I'm still counting it).

Now for this post I'm going to be focusing mainly on the Seventh, Eighth, and Fourth Umbral Calamities. (Which are the ones coincidentally we're told the most about in game). This Calamities all involved Empires. The Allagan and the Garlean, both of which Emet-Selch was responsible for creating. From the Allagans we have the creation of Dalamud, Cyrus Tower, and the Ultima Weapon. As well as an extensive history of biological research. Cloning, Gene Splicing, Mutation and so on. (A sundered mortal's attempts at creation magjicks perhaps?) The Garleans too, have a notible history of biological research, they draw a lot of their modern technology from Allagan design. No coincidence there given Emet-Selch's involvement. But we've seen them use genetic mutation, cyber augmentation, and cloning (Emet-Selch's shadow the hedgehog ass clone bodies because he refuses to look like anyone other than his unsundered self). The also so a lot of research into the Echo. Hydalyn's mark for her champions, and soul maipulation. (Ala Mihgo Dungeon and In From the Cold Duty both points of note for examples of the Soul being manipulated here - physically torn out of the body).

"Now Gengar " - I hear you ask - "What does this have to do with Nature vs Nuture or Zenos?" Well, I tell you, everything really. Hear me out. Emet-Selch designed the Garlean Empire to be the perfect chaos causing conquest force. They have no ability to use either, making them initially vulnerable as a people to the rest of the races. Building up a tasty, tasty resentment and need to feel superior. He sent them marching to 'reclaim their home' and then to 'unify the three contents under their superior peaceful, organised leadership'. The 'Savage Races' summon evil primals and weild evil distructive magjiks. He gave them a perfect cause and reason to hate everyone else. He gave them magitech to level the field and make them supieror at combat. Garlemald as a nation is the perfect war machine. Allagan 2.0 if you would. And Zenos is the perfect 'Champion' to lead that nation into battle. To spark that next Calamity. Look at the guy. Garleans might be on the taller side (depending on the character. Cid is a shorty), but Varis and Zenos are HUGE. Emet-Selch isn't nearly as tall as either of them despite being a blood relation. Which makes me think there was some of that Allagan/Garlean/Ancient playing with genetics and form at work. Make them bigger, more durable, stronger, more intelligent.

It's like Captian America. You want the perfect solider. And a perfect solider for Emet-Selch would also need to be cold, ruthless, manipulative.

There was a post I saw a while again about Mecha Pilots. And OP pondered on the idea of physcially having your brain and body contiditoned to love battle. To love destruction and killing and fighting.

Do you see where I am going with this?

You want someone bloodthirsty enough to cause a Calamity for you, you need them to feel nothing for their fellow man. (Insects all of them. Disappointing. Found Wanting.) You need them to find such overwhelming joy in battle that no other earthely pleasure can compare to it. (Brilliant. Blinding. Trandsenant Moment.)

No attatchments. No emotions, Just violence. I offer to you dear readers, that Emet-Selch carefully modified Zenos' litterally brain chemistry. Making him predisposed to a lack of empathy and his brain releasing those pesky joyous chemicals during battle. Inflicitng and feeling pain. I offer the theory that Zenos has literally been built for combat. If you cut him open, his bones and muscles and organs would be so alienly perfect. Denser, perfectly optimised. Exceedingly perfect. His brain remapped for pattern recognistion and quick skill building, Easy to train in the art of slaughter and tactics. Unable to forge the emotional connections that would only serve to hinder him. (To isolate him from family).

What evidence to I have? Outside of Emet-Selch's known history of building Empires? Easy. I already know he's done this kind of thing before.

Vauthry. The baby Emet-Selch mutated into half a Lightwarden. Able to command the Sin Eaters and ensured would be raised into a tyranically, childish, king. To keep the First from Uniting. To ensure the Eighth Umbral Calamity would continue along it's march to completion.

Why wouldn't Emet-Selch have done as much to Zenos too?

[stansaaa]

i need fantasy romance book recs like ACOTAR if anyone cares to share please!! i’m about 100 pages from finishing ACOSF and it’s been my fav in the series, so preferably books that match that vibe if possible :) i know there are quite literally a million places to look for books similar to ACOTAR but i thought i’d share some more specific things i’m looking for to see if anyone has some more personalized recs (sorry i’m extra & prob asking for a lot, but anything helps!)

things i’m looking for:

- enemies to lovers ofccc (bonus points if it’s a slow burn arc & they don’t automatically stop hating each other the first kiss)

- smut. it doesn’t need to be a LOT a lot (i think nesta & cassian’s story spoiled me lol), but def more than like YA fantasy books & with lots of good sexual tension leading up to it

- a hot male lead (goes without saying i think?) but someone like rhys & cassian, though maybe even meaner bc i <3 big mean men

- NOT modern/contemporary, like no technology/modern slang, etc

- witty banter/dialogue between the two characters

- their love story stays just as interesting even after they sleep together for the first time and they don’t lose their hot tension

- bonus points if the MMC is like hundreds of years old and the FMC starts out as human/isn’t quite as old

- also bonus points if the FMC is really strong in her own right, but the MMC really wants to take care of her anyway

- tbh i also love some good possessiveness/jealousy and i didn’t feel like there was enough of that in ACOTAR so if there are any books where the MMC is like that, that’d be perf

thank you in advance if anyone sees this!

[freyito]

Let’s see those Johnshi headcanons

MEEEE ??? YOU WANNA HEAR MYYYYYY JOHNSHI HEADCANONS?? (specifically asked for people to ask about them) TWIRLS HAIR...

anyways. building off the fact that I headcanon Johnny as Jewish... he's jewish by blood, right? like mother dearest was jewish (and we know hes got daddy issues...) but didnt really like practice much? like Chanukah was about as far as she'd go. HOWEVER. Johnny carries her Matzoh Ball Soup recipe with him at all times. Like it's a little faded list of ingredients in a lockbox with his social security card and birth certificate or something lmfao.

Johnny's got such a mediocre grip on cooking. But obviously you can't just live off of takeout and fancy restaurants your entire life. Johnny also really enjoys cooking but he also thinks cooking together is like real intimate and just a fun date. Kenshi and Johnny have definitely tried to cook together ONCE with Sento by so Kenshi can see... but then Kenshi like nicked his finger and Johnny freaked out so Johnny decided that was that. He'll cook Matzoh Ball soup for Kenshi like once a week but especially during the colder months cause it reminds him of the good parts of his childhood.

Johnny actually really loved Chanukah as a kid cause it was like a second christmas, so he celebrates it every year. The first Chanukah with Kenshi, Johnny was like super giddy... history nerd 100% so Johnny will like hype it up and tell him why Chanukah is important all day until finally it's time to light the candles!!! And Johnny doesn't know like ANY HEBREW... besides the Chanukah chant. Kenshi loves it when Johnny speaks in different languages (I imagine he knows a little cause of his career, but also like he's not fluent in like any of them) so to hear Johnny speak in Hebrew, Kenshi is like !!! WOAH!!! Probably asks Johnny to repeat it again and again...

[Spoilers for Johnny and Kenshi's Tower Ending] Johnny definitely bought Kenshi's groceries a LOT after coming back from outworld. Yeah yeah, they were most definitely in different countries but nothing a little modern day technology can't fix. Johnny also 100% pays Kenshi "surprise visits". Will drop way too much money on a ticket to Japan, do MORE shopping for Kenshi there, then show up at his door. Will also visit Kenshi at work as well, since I assume with both Johnny and Kenshi have such busy schedules, being a director and a OIA agent, they don't get much time together.

On that note, eventually when Johnny's whole divorce is settled and he's on his way to like a third Mortal Kombat movie and an animated film or something, Kenshi requests a transfer to California. Goes through EASILY, and that's when they start living together. By then, Johnny's gotten much better at cooking and like cooks for Kenshi whenever he can.

WE ALL KNOW Johnny's a certified yapper. And Kenshi's a listener, specifically for him. Kenshi will bring up stuff Johnny's said once upon a time and Johnny's like "you remembered!!!" cause not a lot of people really listen to Johnny...

Also. Johnny's got daddy issues. Kenshi's got mommy issues. They complete eachother.

I think a lot of people brush over the fact that Kenshi's definitely fuckin loaded too. Like he was a Yakuza, and now he's a government agent. He's got MONEY MONEY MONEY. So all the time after everything, Kenshi would send over gifts upon gifts to Johnny. They gradually decline in price. Not because he's getting cheaper, no! Kenshi's not much of a gift giver but I can imagine he feels pretty bad for Johnny cause he KNOWS Johnny STILL feels guilty about Kenshi losing his eyesight. Kenshi also believes the small things matter the most, and he starts sending over little things that remind him of Johnny. Only when he moves in with Johnny is when he stops gift giving. But we'll get to why later.

Neither are super picky with their food. But, Johnny hates tomatoes and pickles on burgers. Kenshi will eat them regardless. So Johnny purposefully makes sure that tomatoes and pickles are on whatever burgers he gets. (OLIVE THEORYYYY)

Also since I hced both w/ depression... Johnny normally just kind of. Can't function during hard episodes. He really just prefers to stay in bed and let it pass, cry it out a little. Kenshi on the other hand NEEDS something to do cause it helps him get it out, and he's got a pretty active mind, so a distraction is always needed. So Kenshi LOVES cleaning for Johnny during his episodes, he'll get so much laundry done, everything will like practically spotless. And it kind of helps Johnny's mood get better, too.

Kenshi sets aside like at least a week a month when he has time off to just. live life without Sento, if that makes sense? He'll set Sento aside and just deal with life with a cane, he doesn't mind it like at all. He wants to get comfortable with a cane as well because for very very very obvious reasons he can't bring Sento with him everywhere. Face Mapping also. Like every night. Johnny might complain a little cause Kenshi does it so often but he really loves it. Kenshi's got Johnny's face down, like absolutely down. But does it regardless cause he KNOWS Johnny loves it.

I'm still like 90% sure Kenshi is insecure of his tattoos but doesn't talk about them like at all and I mean I think he's pretty comfortable about his past completely. We hear him joke about it for fucks sake. But he does have a habit of covering up what he can of his tattoos. So on the days where Kenshi's just wearing like a tanktop or even no shirt at all, Johnny's all over his arms tracing his tattoos. Like they will be trapped laying on the couch for HOURS. Cause Johnny has to finish tracing EVERY INCH of Kenshi's tattoos. Kenshi won't ever admit that he likes it. And it's not like... erotic either. It's soft and tender. Johnny's just kind of fascinated. (Johnny also probably will take off his shirt like "now trace mine". he will always and forever have his name tattooed across his chest in my heart)

Their love resembles Ludus (Playful Love) the most. They definitely have some pretty tender and passionate moments, but I think Johnny just in general sets the tone for the relationship. Even if Kenshi is more Pragma (Enduring Love) aligned. Johnny kind of lets his humor take the lead, and Kenshi kind of enjoys it.

When Kenshi moved in, he brought Johnny some konpeitō. Johnny was hooked. Now Johnny has like 3 1lbs packs in the cabinets.

Kenshi 100% has a guide dog. And Johnny dotes on that thing and spoils that thing like a motherfucker...

And finally. After like atleast a year and a half of them living together, Kenshi proposes. Johnny HAD a ring and was ready to propose but he was so worried about it and about the time and he let his nerves get the best of him each and every time. Kenshi doesn't make it a big show... probably after a nice dinner and maybe some dancing. But he definitely set the whole day up. Johnny tries so hard not to cry at his proposal.

anyways. gay losers.

[rancid-zinnia-onthepatio]

MCU's Mysterio was lackluster.

DISCLAIMER: if you like MCU Mysterio THAT IS FINE. I probably love a character you dislike! This is my opinion, it’s not fact.

I become very passionate about characterization, so it’s likely this can be seen as an overreaction to other people. But this is what I like to do so :DDD (I love over-analyzing characters)

So, I’ve obviously been in a Mysterio phase the past little while. I watched Far From Home because I had only heard from people around me about the MCU version of the character. I never watched any MCU movies (besides NWH when it came out), so I didn't know what to expect. At this point, I have watched all of TSSM, read Mysterio’s first issue and a couple others from that era, watched his episodes in the ‘94 cartoon, read Webspinners, and Amazing Mary Jane. I say I have some understanding of what/who Mysterio essentially is.

MCU’s Mysterio, in my opinion, isn’t a good representation of who Mysterio is as a character. The movie seems to only understand him at a surface level. What similarities does MCU’s version have with the common comic consensus? He’s good with technology (and some acting), he’s a liar and a manipulator, and was underappreciated by the people around him. They both also mention illusions, as that is Mysterio’s ENTIRE shtick.

However, I’d argue MCU’s version doesn’t really delve as much into that aspect as it could. Yes, at the time of Mysterio’s debut in the comics, CGI wasn’t really a thing. Perhaps the MCU decided to “modernize” him. But instead, it felt to me, like someone painting an old Victorian house beige to modernize it. Changing his practical effects/magician knowledge to an understanding of holograms feels cheap. Comic Mysterio would absolutely HATE exclusively using CGI. Do other variants use holograms? Yes, TSSM used them a few times. But he also included practical props and magic tricks. Mysterio is a multi-media creative, not just a technician. (To me, anyway.)

The last scene of the movie that features Beck had the perfect opportunity for him to use a robotic clone instead of ANOTHER hologram to trick Peter while he was dying. The smoke surrounding him could've been emitted by the drones, but it was holographic too.

But, holograms are all MCU Beck knows. The other members of his crew had all of the creative or technical traits that the multi-talented stuntman of the comics would have. His character, Quentin, wasn’t even his idea. (Quentin isn’t even his real name, apparently. But we never find out his real name, we just know him as Beck.)

He’s a liar and a manipulator, sure, but that's the most he has that's really in line with who Mysterio is.

He doesn’t have that signature ego the traditional Mysterio is solely reliant on. (To the point where most jabs about him made by Spidey are about said pride. Even in an old PS2 game he called a large robot version of Mysterio “almost as big as [his] ego.”)

When he saves the city from the water elemental, he simply salutes and leaves while the crowd cheers. Mysterio would encourage the cheering, revel in it, as that’s who he is. Hell, even while fighting every elemental in the movie, he does not even try to make a snarky remark or make himself seem cool. (He never even speaks! Only when Peter joins him in fighting does he speak during fights, but it's only to Peter.) Webspinners gave us the idea that Beck knows he’s not the coolest guy ever, but as Mysterio, he can be greater. There is no separation between Beck and Mysterio in the movie, there’s hardly a mask he is putting on (or rather fishbowl). Sure, he tells Spider-Man that “Mysterio is the truth!” seemingly to make Mysterio a symbol, but it falls flat for me.

Usually, Beck and Mysterio are almost two distinct people. Mysterio in the movie has no signature voice or way of speech that makes him grander than the average joe Beck is.

MCU Beck’s given backstory can be interesting, if it weren’t for how it is framed. Note: I do not care about Tony Stark or any of his friends, everything I know about him is surface level. Beck expresses that his holographic technology was taken by Stark and insulted. Supposedly, Beck was fired for being, as he put it, “unstable.” We do not see what this really means. How this scene read to me is that a rich man took advantage of an employee, and thus framed him as mentally unwell to discredit him should he speak up. It could be from my knowledge of Disney’s employee treatment that gives me this icky feeling seeing this scene being framed as “unreasonable” in a way. How dare Beck, a man who’s life's work was stolen and insulted by someone much more powerful than him, get angry at the MCU’s golden boy?

Could Beck be an unreliable narrator here? Absolutely, but from what I heard this is not the first time something like this happens in regards to Stark.

Beck, to me, didn’t read like a loser who puts on a fishbowl to take on a much bigger personality. He feels like a man who you could replace with anyone, and it wouldn’t make that much of a change.

It is such a difference watching that movie, then watching any of his variants in cartoons or reading them in the comics. It’s not even an interesting difference. It’s not a twist on his character that makes me go “Oh, that’s cool.” I'm just left disappointed.

If Beck wasn’t framed as an irrational, short-tempered monster after his “twist reveal,” there could be something to say about his character. He has a legitimate reason to be upset, but it sucks that that is the only motivation he has (and that this motivation drives him so up the wall that he’s willing to kill Peter and mass amounts of people. Mysterio is rarely framed as a killer, from what I’ve seen.).

Yes, Beck is traditionally a very petty man. But my issue is that the backstory also just HAS to include Tony for the sake of Disney's meatriding of him and for Peter's grief the whole movie.

If we use this backstory for him, it could be a representation of lower wage employees being treated as disposable. It could give him some much needed depth. This depth is lost when he gets the “angry killer” characterization after his reveal. It no longer feels like a backstory that makes the audience sympathetic towards him, it feels like we’re just supposed to see that story as the supporting evidence for him being “unstable.” (Because Disney doesn’t want us to side with the lower wage employees that they regularly take advantage of. Look guys! He’s the villain for a reason!)

I could be wrong. This could be a show of how a grudge can turn you into a shell of your former self and lead you down a bad path. Perhaps Beck did have some mental health issues that enhanced his irrationality and anger, but I don’t think that was the intent at all. The framing doesn't feel like we're supposed to feel bad for him. But I do to an extent.

MCU “Quentin” Beck does not feel like Mysterio. He just feels like a guy who knows how to make holograms and maybe says the word "illusion" five or so times.

The illusion Peter is stuck in before he gets hit by a train is actually the only scene I like. There are creative visuals and trippy imagery. But that's one scene, and it's not even that long. Disney, you made the pink elephants on parade segment, do that more.

I simply wished we got the pathetic theater major we ("we" as in Mysterio likers) know and love.

tagged: @mango-water, @cronchyy2, @bluebutterflytears