#anyways its all about silly shenanigans

[eldesperadont]

old 2020 era NJPW Fantasy AU pieces — the setting features a world that’s scared of magic, BC is a cringefail bandit gang, and this loud lanky ex-acrobat they picked up at some point turns out to be a Mage; more in the notes

[tomboyyyaoi]

then they both got so nervous they had to go throw up the end

[chuuyascumsock]

Hop On That Delulu Train Bestie || Minors DNI

Summary: HOOOLY S H I T. WHY. DO I DO THIS TO MYSELF? May you all find peace one day and cure your chronic horniness and delusions for men who would never want you irl <3 (Just like me fr). Anyways, this has been sitting and gathering cobwebs for weeks now, but I’ve decided to finish it in honor of chapter 109. Keep being delulu babe.

Tags: Dazai Osamu/Reader, Afab reader, Soft Dom Dazai, Fingering, Cunnilingus (Why Is That Such A Silly Word), Pussy IS Therapy Ig, He Just Seems Like An Avid Pussy Eater Idk, Would Definitely Use Your Thighs As Earmuffs, Sorry Y’all Don’t Get The Dick <3, I Was Too Lazy To Turn This Into A Full Smut.

The quiet hum of a low light lamp buzzes through your ears as your eyes flicker over the words to the page mindlessly. Reading was boring, watching television was boring, everything was boring.

You look over to the clock on your nightstand and let out a loud sigh. Nearly midnight and he had still yet to walk through the door as he usually does and smother you with sweet nothings and soft kisses. Your gaze falls back onto your book, the romance novel glaring back with the most dull descriptions and irritating plot. You shut the book, tossing it aside as you groan and knock your head back against the headboard of your bed.

Picking up your phone that sits on the nightstand dresser, you note the empty screen with no obnoxious texts from a certain brunette. It was almost worrying not seeing his name on your lock screen with a bunch of random emojis spammed next to it. Unlocking your phone, you re-read your last text sent to him nearly two hours ago— asking when he’d be home.

You start to wonder if he’s late because of another failed suicide attempt, but you quickly let the thought pass when you finally hear the front door open. It closes almost silently, muffled footsteps growing closer to your room. Your eyes focus on your door frame as Dazai finally steps in, his clothes disheveled and hair messy.

“ ‘Samu…” You murmur, slightly taken aback at his appearance.

His warm brown eyes travel over to the bed where you lay and a small smile curls onto his lips as he shuffles over and climbs onto your side of the bed, his face and upper body planting atop of your legs. He heavily inhales before exhaling, his hot breath blowing against the skin of your thighs. Subconsciously, one of your hands makes its way into his hair and begins to comb through his tangled tresses. His arms wrap around under your legs and lock them in place.

“My love…” He whispers back, his body relaxing on you as his feet hang over the bottom edge of the bed. He kicks his shoes off and allows them to thump to the ground.

“You didn’t answer my text, something happen?” Your brows scrunch together in concern.

Dazai sighs, pressing a light kiss against your thigh, “My phone was in my pocket during a shoot out and it was sadly destroyed.”

You wait for him to make a joke about wishing the bullet went through his skull instead, but it never comes to your surprise. “Oh… Well, I guess we can go look for a new one tomorrow then.” You finish unknotting his hair with your fingers as a moment of silence settles over the both of you before you add, “I’m guessing today was rough then?”

He hums in return, enjoying the way your hand runs through his hair affectionately. “Kunikida made me do my paperwork,” He pouts, his chin coming to rest on your thighs to look up at you.

You briefly laugh, patting his head before speaking with a mock-sympathetic tone, “Aw, my poor baby…”

He huffs, burying his face back into the plush of your thighs, “You don’t sound very genuine, that’s very mean you know… He’s always bullying me around.”

You raise an eyebrow at him, knowing full well that whatever shit Kunikida gives Dazai— he deserves every bit of it for his shenanigans. You’ve only met him a few times as well as Dazai’s other co-workers, but it was safe to say that if anyone was being bullied— it was that poor bastard, Kunikida. “Oh, really? And you don’t bother the hell out of him until he loses his shit?” You stop running your hand through his hair.

Dazai gasps, overdramatically, of course, “I would never! Kunikida is my respectable co-worker who I value and treat with the utmost—“

“Then why do I get calls from him begging me: “For the love of God, please come get your terrorizing bastard of a boyfriend, I can’t do it anymore.” Huh?”

Cue another gasp, “You’re talking to other men?! Kunikida no less!?”

You roll your eyes, “It was originally because he called me to come get you every time you decided to take a dip in the canal, now it’s a complaint hotline for you.” You poke an index finger against his forehead firmly.

“Owie…” He brings a hand up to rub his forehead, bottom lip jutting out.

“You’re a handful, you know that?” You grumble, staring down at him, “I deserve a medal for putting up with your shenanigans.”

“Isn’t my love enough?” Dazai whines, making puppy eyes at you.

A sigh leaves your lips, “Yeah… You’re lucky you’re cute.”

His lips quirk up back into a smile and he nuzzles his face back against your skin, placing small kisses to your thighs.You don’t really keep count, but it takes a few pecks until he gently nips at your thigh.

“Hey—“ You squeak, pushing at his head which causes him to chuckle, “You’re doing that on purpose.”

The kisses on your thighs grow sloppy before he moves his arms from around your legs to nudge them apart, his body fitting between your legs. He quickly maneuvers your thighs until the backs of your thighs press against the tops of his shoulders, arms wrapping around your legs to keep you against him. “What? I’m just getting comfortable, my love.” He plays off innocently, his cheek squishing against one of your thighs as he looks up at you.

Your brows furrow, heat crawling up your neck as you glare back suspiciously, “I know what you’re doing.”

“And is it a bad thing?” He chimes back, going back to kissing your thighs.

You shiver, feeling his wet lips leave a trail of saliva to air along the insides of your thighs, “You know I’m—“

“Sensitive? Yeah,” He trails off with a noise that sounds like a groan mixed with a hum.

At this point, you feel a tingle crawl up your spine and warmth spread across your face. A fuzziness begins to form in your mind as his lips grow closer to the edge of your sleep shorts.

He pauses when he gets to your shorts, his face pulling away and his hands coming to tug at the hem of your shorts. “Want these off,” He mumbles, pulling at them.

You’re quick to lift your hips and slip your shorts down your legs, Dazai’s hands fumbling along yours to throw them to the side. He buries his face between your legs once more to press his lips along your inner thighs until he reaches your underwear. His face pushes forward until his lips press against your cunt and nose nudges your clit through the thin fabric.

A strangled moan passes your lips as he meets your flustered gaze, and although you can’t see his mouth with it pressed against you— you can tell he’s smirking through his eyes.

He softly breathes in before placing a searing kiss against your clothed pussy, causing your thigh to slightly twitch in his grasp. “I missed this pretty little pussy— haven’t tasted it in days,” He groans before bringing a finger to pull your underwear aside and reveal your glossy folds to him. His gaze is greedy as he parts your folds with two fingers, mouth watering at your slicked insides.

“Don’t stare…”

“Awe, but I can’t help it— looks so good,” Dazai breathes out before leaning forward to slip his tongue flat between your spread folds, licking up to your clit to collect your taste on his tongue. “Tastes good too…” He groans, lapping his tongue through for a second time, “I could spend the whole day eating this pussy out until you’re quivering and begging for me to stop.”

A strung-out whimper escapes your throat as you watch him. Heat burns the nape of your neck, the dizzy feeling hitting you twice as hard as your eyelids lull.

Dazai is shameless in his sucking and slurping of lips and tongue against your dripping cunt as loudly as possible. He doesn’t hold back any of his needy groans and muffled whimpers as he tastes every drop of arousal you have to offer. He strains painfully against the confines of his pants as he holds back the urge to fold you in half and fuck you on his cock until your drooling cunt is filled to the brim with his cum.

His tongue delves into your tight hole, the warm muscle wriggling against your clenching walls before sliding out. After repeating the process a few times, he moves to suck at your throbbing clit, sighing at the way it pulses against his tongue. There’s a small ‘pop’ when he pulls away reluctantly to replace his mouth with his lengthy, thin fingers.

“I love the way you squirm under my touch— drives me crazy— you know that?” Dazai grins before sinking a finger into your wet hole.

An airy gasp leaves your lips as you try to move away from him in surprise, only to have his grip tighten around your thigh with his free hand. “ ‘Samu, I—“ Your fingers clench into the sheets on the bed.

“I know, my love— feel good?” He borderline coos, eyes glued to the way you sucked his finger back in with every pump. “I bet it does, your fingers just don’t reach like mine, do they?” He adds a second finger, his digits curving into your gummy sweet spot.

Your hips involuntarily buck in to meet his thrusting fingers, your pussy squelching around his lithe digits. He leers at the obscene image of your sweet cunt swallowing his fingers down to the knuckle with a lewd moan.

“Good girl, keep fucking yourself on my fingers like that,” He croons, leaning forward to suck at your puffy clit again.

Surges of pleasure rampage within you as you clamp your shaking thighs around his head, grinding your aching pussy against his mouth and fingers. “M’gonna come, s’too much—“ You whimper.

“Come on my tongue— wanna feel that pussy clench around my fingers,” Dazai muffles a groan against your sensitive clit which has you coming undone and vehemently shivering from the feeling of your climax.

Dazai slides his fingers out of your pulsing hole and presses his tongue against your drenched pussy as you ride out your orgasm— his tongue not missing a single drip of arousal. He sighs quietly when he’s finished and pulls away, your bare sex covered in merely his spit now.

With your chest heaving from the aftermath, your head weakly shifts to watch Dazai sit up on his knees and hover over. “ ‘S-Samu…”

“Shh, I know, my love,” He laughs softly— and you think he’s going to redress you before cuddling into you like he usually does, but he doesn’t. Instead, his hand trails down to unzip his pants, the tip of his pre-cum leaking cock peeking out of his waistband. He pushes both his pants and boxers to his mid thighs before stroking his hard cock.

“You’re tired, so why don’t you just lay back and let me fuck that pretty pussy to sleep, hm?”

[andthendk]

Late Halloween: warning! Mild Spice🔥

When I asked my friends for quick Halloween ideas, this is what I got

Y'all NASTY.....(I love it🩷) So after what, 5 days this is probably the quickest piece I've finished....albeit late 😂😂 I feel like this one's similar to one of my earliest lemon🍋 works? Anywho, hurrah until we meet again on smutweek, folks 😂

And yes they are full grown adults here. Anyways you have been warned ❤️‍🔥

[BEHIND SCENE PLOTS] I had no time to draw but wanted to share anyway...😂

- them cheeks (everyone's loss rly, the real "behind scene")😙

- full shot of cop Damian; Raven at first decided against using the sexy ver. because she respects the mantel and all its forebearers a ton(and it's silly)....but after seeing Damian's cop costume she decided she'll need to make sure they don't attend ;)) next year she's gonna make them go as frumpy salt & pepper shakers or something🧂🧂

- Titus in a three-headed Cerberus plushie costume + custom-made pumpkin Bottega bag for treats🐾🎃

- Kori, at the party, giving a knowing look while Dick's confusion twofolds *flashbacks to several of their own Halloween shenanigans*🌝😹

- (As per the lovely idea-pitcher) Damian later seriously contemplating, "I'm into it, but what does it say about me?" w/ Harley and her professional clipboard scribbling madly in the background🤡👩🏼‍⚕️

- Robin!Raven's revenge, 'cause no Robin gets f**ked over by the police and leaves like that😎💥

[princessbrunette]

thinking about how daddy!johnb caring all of your things in his lil backpack so you don’t have to worry your pretty head about losing your things. like he has your fave snacks in there incase you get hungry, has extra bandaids because know who clumsy you are, keeps your go to lip combo in a small bag so they don’t get mixed in this his things. tbh daddy!johnb seems like the type of daddy to have a whole pocket of his backpack dedicated to his pup!!

also if it’s alright can i be 🏵️ anon??

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨🌼୧⋆ ˚｡⋆

sometimes the days seem too long, especially with the shenanigans the pogues drag you into! it tires you out, and all you wanna do is curl up on your boyfriends lap back at the chateau, eat and nap. as john b once said, “hibernation is key for a happy girlfriend.”

it had become habit for him to carry your things. he remembers the meltdown you had last time you’d misplaced the little nature valley bars you’d brought with you specifically to snack on— motivating the brown eyed boy to always carry them from that point on, along with heaps of other stuff you deemed important. it made his backpack a little heavier, sure. but he was a strong boy — and plus, what did he really need to bring out with him aside his phone (which went in his pocket anyway) and some maps?

jj steers the boat across the calm water— a quieter moment for the group for once as you journey to your next destination.

snapping you out of a pouty daze, john b’s tanned legs appear infront of your line of vision where you sit before he’s bending at the knee to be eye level with you, offering you a friendly smile.

“what’dja need, hm? you look like you need something.” he chimes lightheartedly, always seeming to be in a chipper mood these days.

“i’m hungry… and tired.” you fiddle with the cuffs of your denim shorts, always feeling guilty when you complain, not wanting to seem like you couldn’t keep up with the group.

“well your hunger, i can do something about…” your boyfriend begins, shrugging his backpack off his back and swinging it round to his front, digging through its contents. “voila, mon chéri.” he theatrically produces the snack he’d packed for you, wiggling his brows a little at his own silliness.

“ooh, you know some french?” you giggle to yourself, already busying yourself with tearing open the packaging. he hoists himself up to where you’re sitting and plonks down right beside you, pulling you into his side to lean against him.

“no uh… not really no…” he chuckles, watching you take a bite out of your snack, happily munching. “anyway, as for your tiredness i can’t do much about that right now…” he glances round, pope and kie immersed in their own conversation and jj preoccupied with steering to not be minding his business. “but i can promise cuddling on the couch… at the chateau… when we’re finished up here?” he speaks softly, thumb drawing patterns on your back making you lean more of your weight on him.

you turn your cheek to rest against his warm body, licking a crumb off your bottom lip. “i want that, daddy.” you whisper, just for him to hear and his heart melts.

“okay… good job on holding out today. wont keep you out too long, sleepy girl.”

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨🌼୧⋆ ˚｡⋆

[weirdmageddon]

I'm taking the plunge because why not:

What are some headcanons regarding small, silly things that happened during the 3 year trips on the Golden Yard and Meteor?

oh lets go i love this sort of ask. no meteor crew stuff sorry im kinda tired but

on the prospitian ship:

the crocodiles are never recovering from that shit bro. un-stonks

alchemizing sessions. probably with mundane household devices like toothbrushes or something. patterned toilet paper. davesprite absolutely remakes the sbahjifier for himself but i think he also likes to hand draw them from time to time. also john and jade alchemizing bathing suits and going swimming on lolar and hanging with the turtles. casey can come too. floaties on casey

the sbahj canon diverges. so many sbahj in-jokes exclusive to the prospitian ship. unfortunately the retcon make it so none of this ever happens :(

he’d never say it but davesprite likes it when john and jade fall asleep on him doing whatever, it makes his presence feel wanted and appreciated by the people he sacrificed his self and humanhood for good for. sorry for immediately going into davesprite but good god is he tragic. oh yeah heres more. he’s still part dave and shares the same history with john and jade that alpha timeline dave does. john gave him his shades on his 13th birthday in december 2008, he sent john the con air bunny and jade a physical copy of sbahj as furries in the mail. he is identical to alpha dave in relation to his friends before the timeline splits off. dont forget that 4/13/2009 was also his first time meeting his online friends john and jade in person, even after 4 months chronologically of sburb grinding—nearly a year with all the time shenanigans—and going back to day 1, since john and jade were dead in his timeline

tries not to cry cries anyway but only when he knows theyre asleep. pov when the weight of everything suddenly hits you (you are an emotionally repressed 14 year old)

also because he’s fucking fluffy and absolutely knows it and probably thinks to himself “yeah this is the best possible use for these otherwise pointless breast feathers” and yall already know he craves cloth mother plus probably has nesting instincts

(source)

adding on to that also i think people forget sprites are actually fucking LONG and his wingspan is fucking huge he could be a pillow and a blanket at the same time

i wrote davesprite jade cuddles and john thinking about mushrooms and davesprite thinking about how they contribute to the ecnonony

^ john toked too hard on the lowas mushrooms by accident one time

it feels like pajama parties would be a common occurence just the vibes im getting. literally jade is seen sitting on a pile of squiddles and theres plushies fucking everywhere you know they got up to plushie mayhem. do you think they ever alchemized them. look how lived in that room is they all contributed something

jade resumes gardening :) but theres no sun :( but she alchemizes some plastic plants :D but its not the same :(

canonically the imps in johns house just gave up tormenting him and started hanging out and having snacks on movie night

PENIS!

imagine looking up into the sky and seeing a giant casey the size of a planet sleep. jade resizes stuff for fun like this just to introduce some novelty to their lives

this is something

davesprite has beavis and butthead do america (1996) in his collection somewhere in his apartment on lohac

yall theyre watching johns fuckin spongebob dvd box collection. you KNOW john owns the spongebob squarepants movie (2004). and the best thing is it brings all of them together without any of them objecting. they all love spongebob

when the episode jellyfish jam comes on johns like “wow, pretty much this exact scenario happened to me with the imps.” (arthur flashback sfx)

DAVESPRITE: yeah well you didnt have a giant sound system did you

jade warps dave’s bro’s sound system from lohac and sizes it up. they put on stadium rave and the entire fucking house shakes

[unreleasedwrites]

Love your writing!!! Could I request a fluff scenario with jake kim? Thank uu💕💕

Baking Shenanigans

“F’me?”

summary: You and your boyfriend are spending the weekend at your place. When you two were suddenly craving for something sweet, so you guys make the choice to try baking a strawberry shortcake using a highly reviewed recipe you guys found on the internet. Surprisingly, it went as you two hoped and tasted delicious.

character(s) included: Jake Kim x fem!reader

cw: fluff, cheesy pickup lines, teasing, flirting, idk much abt baking I just googled a recipe and the storyline follows the steps, jake is tall therefore you guys have a height difference, mentions of knives but its just for slicing strawberries, blushing/getting flustered, jake and reader are in an established and healthy relationship, nicknames or petnames like babe, kissing, waist holding, sLIGHTly just SLIGHTly suggestive at the end but not really so dw, there may be a few typos or grammatical errors so mb about that i didnt read too thoroughly

unwrapped on: Wednesday Morning, December 20 2023

wrapped up on: Wednesday Night, December 20 2023

published on: Thursday Noon, December 21 2023 (at around 12 PM)

“While you’re cutting up the strawberries, I’ll go ahead and preheat the oven!” You stated. “Oh- And I’ll also get our ingredients for the dough and some other materials we’ll need.” You added.

“Got it, shortcake.” Jake replied.

“Hey.. Just because were baking a strawberry shortcake, it doesn’t mean you should take the opportunity to give me a new nickname!”

He laughed in response as he swiftly sliced the fresh strawberries.

“You’re a natural in using knives, I thought you were more of a close combat kinda guy.” You mesmerized his hands slicing through each strawberry smoothly, glancing at the tattoos that trailed his arms.

“Well- I am, and I never really use knives. I rarely cook and it’s not my style to just stab my way through a serious match.” He shrugged.

You went ahead and got the different materials you guys needed to make the strawberry shortcake. You then took a stroll through the kitchen, from cabinet to fridge, to collect the various ingredients you’d be using according to the recipe you guys are following.

“Alright-y! I’ve got everything we were missing.”

“You’re the only one i’m ever missing,” he said as he turned towards your flustered face.

“Oh shut up, I’m right here. I always have been, and I always will be.” You replied as you got on your tippy toes and gave him a kiss on the cheek then added, “Look at how the tables have turned.. You’re the one who’s fluster-” You added before he cut you off and kissed you on your lips for a good 5 or so seconds, which made you even more flustered than you already were beforehand.

“Well would you look at that! Little miss’ no longer flustered has her cheeks as red as these strawberries,” He teased as he brought one down to your lips and fed you it. “Hmph,” was all you said in return because you knew you wouldn’t be able to top that. Which in the end, only made him chuckle.

You guys started to open the ingredients and put what’s required in the bowl you put out for the dough. Once you guys finished doing so, you mixed the dough mixture and proceeded to knead it for about a minute— which your boyfriend was the one to do so since he’s really strong anyway and wouldn’t struggle one bit. After lightly coating it in some flour, he rolled the dough into the specific thickness that was instructed and stated on the said recipe.

“Now that we’ve finished rolling the dough, we now need the biscuit cutter!” You said joyfully as you looked up at your boyfriend.

“Right! I’ll go get that for us.” He paused as he opened your cabinet with all of your tools for baking and cooking. “..What exactly does that look like..?” He added.

You laughed and walked to his side to assist, “It’s that one, silly.”

“I knew that! ..Obviously, I just wanted to see if you did too.” He laughed and so did you.

Once you guys had cut your dough into two thick circles, you went on to quickly melt some butter while your boyfriend was lining up a baking sheet for your guys’ tray. After only a few seconds, you took the butter out and greased up the baking sheet using your good ol’ brush. Once Jake placed the dough onto the tray with the greased up baking sheet, you brushed them up with some of the remaining melted butter in your bowl.

“I think its time!” You announced.

“..For you to give me a kiss?” He teased.

“Uh-uh babe. My lips are locked, but maybe later— If you can crack the code, that is. But for now, lets place these in the oven for about 12 minutes.”

“Awh,” he pouted and gave you his best puppy eyed look (although he doesnt even have to try), “Cmonn~ I promise I’ll control myself and I wont smother you in kisses like last week, pretty please” He pleaded, “with a lil’ strawberry on top?”

“Hmm..”

“Pleaseeee”

“Alright Alright!” You finally gave in as you put the tray into the oven, right after you set it to the instructed temperature and time.

Before you could even give him the go, he already grabbed onto your waist, clinging onto your body like a koala with its favorite tree. He started planting kisses all over your head and neck, down to your collarbone and shoulders— which were out in the open since you were wearing a very loose off shoulder top along with shorts.

“Babe-! You promised you’d control yourself!” You tried to speak out, but it was slightly muffled since he was too busy kissing you all over, especially in places he knew you were ticklish in— which caused you to keep laughing, ultimately forgetting you were trying to stop him in the first place from getting away with his little acts.

Twelve minutes finally passed by and you two heard a ding, signaling it was ready. So you guys made your way to the kitchen and you took out some mittens and grabbed the tray from the oven.

“Ta-da! They aren’t raw and they aren’t burnt at all! Its perfect!”

“I never doubted us for a second!” Jake spoke sarcastically.

“Well when you say it like that, I dont believe you one bit..”

“All we need now is the cream, I’ll place everything in the bowl and I’ll also mix it, could you prepare the strawberries and grab a plate with utensils so we could plate it right after?” Your boyfriend said as he looked at you with his wholesome smile you can’t get enough of.

“Will do!”

So then Jake got the remaining ingredients for the cream and made the mixture altogether, while you got the plate and a fork right after you prepared the strawberries your boyfriend was slicing earlier.

“I’ve got the spatula (for baking) here, so let’s place the cream.”

“While you do that, I’ll place the strawberries in the lathered cream,” you replied.

After finishing up the cream with strawberries on the second layer, which is also the last, you topped it off with some tiny bits of strawberries while you snacked on the remaining ones.

“We’ve finally finished!”

Jake grabbed a knife from the utensils drawer and took the fork you placed on the counter beforehand, he then sliced through the cake. “Say Ahhh~” Your boyfriend said as he lifted it up towards your lips.

“Ahhh” You opened your mouth and your boyfriend fed you the slice of cake, “How is it, babe?” He asked as you chewed your food.

You nodded in approval in a positive look, and once you finished the food in your mouth— you replied, “It’s the perfect amount of sweet! It’s not overly sweet but it isn’t missing any flavor either, here- you try!” You sliced through the cake and placed it on the fork you two were sharing, “Say Ahhh~”

“F’me?” Your boyfriend said with a hint of rasp in his voice,

“Yes sir~” You replied and brought the fork up to his lips.

“Ahhh~” Your boyfriend opened his mouth after he chuckled in amusement from watching your precious reaction to cake.

Your boyfriend smiled in approval and gave you a thumbs up. You then took some of the icing/cream on top using the fork and ate it. You hummed and your boyfriend said, “You’ve got a lil something, babe.” You turned up and looked at him with a confused look and mumbled a little “Hm?” in response.

“Here let me get that for you,” He then grabbed your waist and pulled you in for a kiss, all the while you still had a bunch of the icing in your mouth, which he started to help you with. You got insanely flustered, again. Despite this being such a regular occurrence, you’re always so flustered whenever it happens.

“So did I even have a little something? Or was that just my jake’s little excuse?”

“Believe it or not, you actually did have some icing on the side of your lips, which I cleaned up! So, your welcome~” He said with a smirk.

“Yeah yeah, whatever you say.” You scoffed.

“How about we go watch a movie, What do you say? Your boyfriend suggested.

“What movie?”

“How about this romantic movie I heard about last week?”

“Of course its romance again, huh?” You scoffed sarcastically.

“What can I say? I am a sucker for romance after all.”

notes: I HAVE BEEN GONE FOR SO LONG AND I AM SO SORRY😭 Its not like I just forgot about what I was doing here, I just got really busy with school and all the exams and everything.. I’m so sorry for disappearing out of the blue, but I have been going back and fourth in the works in my drafts, because I have been trying to finish some one’s request but it just keeps going NOWHERE. and I have literally restarted twice when I was already halfway because I really wasn’t happy with how it was going and i am struggling to get it done 💀 I hope this is good and since the pattern of my posts are fic-drabble-fic-drabble-fic-drabble/answering an ask-and this fic, I will be start working on a drabble of multiple lookism characters, im not yet sure what scenario I’ll be doing but yeah.. and to the anon who made the request about Gun, im really trying to work on it im so sorry its been almost 3 months.. 😭😭 ALSO, TO THE ANON WHO REQUESTED THIS, im sorry it took so long as well and since you just said a fluff scenario, I figured i’d go ahead with my idea to make my post about baking shenanigans a series, so yall can request a character for that

- With or without proper credits, please don't try to steal or claim any of my works as your own

I genuinely appreciate opinions, feedback, likes, and reblogs

Once again, I hope this isn't too bad for all of you that likes Jake or lookism, and I'll be doing more characters in lookism 🫶🫶

[evelili]

I just finished your Magnum Opus, and it was super great. I especially loved the Pinkie chapter (which surprised me because she’s my least favorite character!). Anyway, do you have any mlp fic recommendations?

oh boy do i have a list for you, strap in!

if you read my magnum opus writeup, you may have seen i mentioned three authors that dragged me back into mlp. if you're interested in sciset (and what's probably the most popular eqg fic on the entire site), Long Road to Friendship by Albi is a longfic that started after the first eqg movie and is a rlly lighthearted read. i don't normally care for OCs but gosh if i dont accept Albi's version of trixie's parents as canon in my heart haha. if you're interested in pony adventure fic, i also rlly liked Sunset of Time, another rlly well done longfic ive carried in my brain since i first read it xd

the second author, Monochromatic, aka the raritwi authority aka someone who has a GREAT taste in editors, has written three of the most formative longfic ive ever read: The Enchanted Library, its sequel The Enchanted Kingdom, and Crimson Lips which i unfortunately can no longer link since she's taken it down, but i believe you can still buy physically through PFP if you wanted to take a gamble on it (it would be a very good gamble). apart from her longfic though i also adore some of her shorter works, including but not limited to The Choices We Make, a really interesting Pinkie study that's definitely shaped how i view her, Your Own Worst Enemy, which is just. peak rarity content, and Injuring Eternity, which while being one of her older works still has certain passages that wreck me emotionally on sight.

and the third author responsible for my magnum opus is the one and only Aragon, who i can not only recommend for his fics but ALSO for his blog posts and comics (see the comic index on his profile for links to all of them, as well as this amazing blogpost about his neighbour that is just peak comedy). he's also the writer responsible for the banger longfic Crime and Funishment which absolutely defined my writing aspirations for a few years and is the definition of comedy if you looked it up in my heart, as well as In Hindsight, yet another banger rarity fic, and Love Is In Doom which is just bloody, silly, stupid fun (and has sunset shimmer in it)

and then if we want to talk fics i love written by other authors, Sleepless Knights by r5h has my favourite brand of scitwi written right into the margins, Administrative Angel by horizon has one of the most amazing endings to an opening chapter ive ever read AND an amazing celestia, The Best Night Ever by Capn_Chryssalid is a fandom classic with a groundhog day twist on the gala episode from s1, Side by Side by Krickis is a feel-good rarijack oneshot w a focus on lgbt (specifically trans) themes, Wax Earplugs by Reedhoarse has a dysfunctional mess of an adagio dazzle that i adore, Merge Request by FanOfMostEverything has all the scitwi/midnight shenanigans you could ask for wrapped up in the relatable content of github hell, Guppy Love by PaulAsaran is a rarijack longfic with an incredibly realistic setting and an interpretation of mermaids that i love so much, Doused Flame by heartlessons has me handshaking on the "sopping wet pathetic relatable guy" flash sentry interpretation that won me over recently, 80 Days 'Til the World's Farthest Shore by Cynewulf feels like reading a professionally published short story (and i mean that in the best of ways, it's enthralling), and finally if you'll allow me to be self-centred a bit i also am very proud of my two oneshots Heartstrings and Something About Midnights if you wanted to check em out too xd

oops long post!! im not sorry for it, i hope you can find something in here that catches your fancy (or even all of it haha), there's soooo many incredible fics in the fandom it floors me every day that i can read all these incredible works for free!!!

[amelie-isnt-french]

Against my better judgement, can I ask about the 24k word TMA conspiracy board?

I like how you already know that you might regret this halfway through, self-awareness is important!

Against anon's better judgement, I hereby present the Original TMA Brainrot Document! *drumroll*

I've only had comment permissions on this document since today, actually, so all my added nonsense is FRESH!

General layout is this: the doc goes episode by episode until mid s4 (as you, beloved people, can see below), and then we follow it up with conspiracy rants, entity characterisations & rituals. Not only confirmed rituals, but also Ali's speculations, which are delightful.

Let's start out gently, shall we? First info we get on the document is about the Magnus Institute and its employees:

Yes, I know this is Hannah-from-the-library erasure, but she's on maternity leave. Good on her. If you, like me, have no idea who Sonia is, please comment because I feel very silly that I cannot remember her for the life of me. Thanks o7

Anyway!

Every episode entry will look like an approximation of this, with more or less red string ranting and "ohhhhh I know that name!!" depending on the episode.

What follows now is a highlight trip through things written by @alice-apparently and carefully chosen by yours truly.

Firstly, to highlight once again our different listening styles: Ali edited this document after pretty much every episode she listened to and I blazed through a quarter of s1 in one afternoon. Self-restraint? Never heard of her.

Cross-referencing like the good academic she is:

Ali's paranoia is rarely wrong, even when she doubts herself. Granted, she might run right past ginormous plot points, but none of the details shall escape her grasp!

Fun fact: in s4, we turned Ali's "I'm so worried about Martin" into a whatsapp sticker, THAT'S how often she texted me those exact words

Bone Apple Teeth. also something something DC Universe, help me out here folks bc I know zilch about DC save for Henry Cavill's Superman films (for shame, I know I know)

Jurgen Leitner??? Stupid idiot motherfucking Jurgen Leitner-

No but fun fact, Gerry Keay (and Mike Crew/Ex Altiora) is the reason Ali even started this doc, so we are very very attached to Gerry in this house and only mildly upset at Leitner's demise. Ceci n'est pas un pipemurder.

mag 39 "Infestation"

- WORMS

'nuff said

Poll time: the two genders are as follows ->

Michael's stabby shenanigans and not!sasha being, well, not Sasha. Rude.

I've hit the max image limit, so wait for the self reblog for more rambling if you so please <3

[softshrimpy]

How To Woo A Hot Principal

Chapter 2: Step 2: Don't Panic

Summary: Working at the weathervane was exactly what you needed. The routine, the people, your co-worked. It certainly helped that a certain tall, blonde, fucking gorgeous woman happened to frequent the cafe. Now some may call hopelessly flirting with your customers inappropriate behavior.

But truly, when it came it Larissa Weems, who could blame you?

the silly bitch is back this time with teenage shenanigans. 🦐

Chapter 1

Cross Posted to AO3 Here

HTWAHP Masterlist

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“You can do this, it’s just a building. A very beautiful goth as fuck building that happens to be housing the woman you’re head over heels for. The very woman whose coffee you’re holding…” you mumble to yourself, staring up at the impressive building of Nevermore Academy.

It really was a beautiful building, in a goth macabre sort of way. When you were younger you probably would’ve killed to go to a school that looked like this. You could’ve been dark and edgy on epic balconies, every depressed teen’s dream.  However, you’re currently more concerned with arguing with yourself about the stupidity of your offer. You can’t help but think maybe Larissa was simply being polite and didn’t want you to show up at her workplace. Maybe she actually can’t stand you and your painfully obvious crush on her and didn’t have the heart to tell you to buzz off. Maybe this-

Your spiralling is abruptly cut off but a monotone voice, “Are you just going to stand there or are you actually going to come in?”

“JESUS FUCK-“ you yell, jumping at the voice, nearly dropping your precious cargo. You look away from the window you had been staring out to see a dark-haired girl standing in the doorway, glaring up at you. She’s obviously a student, judging by the uniform she’s wearing despite it completely lacking its usual colour.

“How long have you been standing there?” you ask, trying to recover from your near heart attack.

“Long enough to question your intentions here.” She replies.

“Wednesday! There you are!” a bright voice exclaims from behind your interrogator.

You look behind the girl, Wednesday, to see a sweet-looking blonde girl skipping over to you two. She stops next to Wednesday with a bright smile. She looks like the embodiment of sunshine honestly. The two standing next to each other is quite the juxtaposition.

“Oh! Hi, I’m Enid.” She introduces herself, sticking her hand out for you to shake.

You tell her your name and she smiles before turning to Wednesday.

“We have botany soon, I was just coming to get you but you weren’t in our room. Thing told me you were trying to escape again.” She grins.

“Thing will pay for his treachery soon enough.” Wednesday mumbles. “And as you can see, I’m still here.”

“Escape?” You mumble, glancing back at Wednesday “I thought this was a school, not a prison.”

“May as well be one.” Wednesday huffs, followed by Enid smacking her arm lightly.

“It’s not that bad! You’re just dramatic. Anyway, we’re going to be late, so let’s go.” She says, all but dragging a scowling Wednesday behind her.

“Oh uh, wait! Could you tell me how to get to Laris- I mean Principal Weems’s office? I have something for her.” You ask.

You swear you have never seen someone move faster in your life. One moment Enid was dragging her grumpy goth friend away and the next she was right in front of you, staring up at you with gleaming eyes.

“You’re here to see Principal Weems?? Are you two friends? Are you more than friends? What did you bring her?” She gushes.

“Don’t uh…don’t you have to get to botany?” You ask, taking a step back.

You’re not all that sure what you and Larissa are really. Or why she said yes ti you bringing her coffee every morning. For all intents and purposes, you’re just a very dedicated barista to her. Which makes your heart ache in a very pathetic way. But you’re fairly certain she wouldn’t want whatever relationship you have going on to be known by any of her students. She strikes you as the type to value her privacy.

“It’s fine. We’ll take you to Principal Weems’s office. We won’t get in any trouble. And we’d be happy to help, right Wednesday?”

“I’d rather willingly poison myself with Miss Thornhill’s plants thanks.” She grumbles.

“See! It’s settled. Let’s go!” Enid exclaims, setting off further into the school.

“Is she always like this?” You ask Wednesday.

“Every hour of every day so far.”

“Wow”

The two of you catch up to Enid who then continues to try and grill you for information on what you’re delivering to her principal and what your relationship to her is. You answer relatively honestly, telling her you’re just there to deliver coffee and you’ll probably be back, but it’s nothing more than that. She seems to not believe you, which is doubled when Wednesday makes a comment about a trip to Nevermore to deliver coffee not being typical service from the Weathervane.

“You’re totally in love with her!” Enid squealed, practically bouncing on the spot.

“I-that’s. First of all, that’s none of your business, and second you’re jumping to conclusions! I just- laris- I mean Principal Weems is a wonderful busy woman who needs coffee. There’s nothing weird about me bringing one to her in the morning! And- and it doesn’t even have to mean anything! Can’t it just be me being nice?”

“You know, they say those who become defensive when confronted are usually guilty.” Wednesday chirps with a smirk.

Dear god having two teenagers gang up on you about your crush on their principal was not what you imagined your morning to include.

“Do you two enjoy bullying a kind-hearted adult?”

“Yes.” Wednesday deadpans eliciting a snort from you.

“And we’re here!!” Enid exclaims, stopping in front of a pair of double doors.

You stare at the golden plaque on the door. The nerves from outside have returned tenfold now. And you can’t help but wonder if you should just turn and leave. You have a habit of taking things a step too far, you’re worried this is one of those times. What if she’s busy and doesn’t want you bothering her? What if-

“Well, we should get going!” Enid smiles, and then -to your horror- knocks on the door before quickly dragging Wednesday away.

“Come in” you hear an angelic voice answer from the other side.

Well you can’t just turn around now, and you did come all this way. So with that thought you take a deep breath and open the door.

And Jesus fucking Christ it should be illegal how lovely Larissa Weems looks seated at her desk, glasses perched on her nose, light beaming in from the window behind her. She looks like an angel, truly. She looks breathtaking you genuinely nearly forget to breathe.

And when she glances up from her laptop screen to look at you? If you were meltable you’d be nothing but a puddle right this second. Christ on a stick it’s a good day to love women, especially the very gorgeous woman in front of you.

“Darling? What are you doing here?” She asks, standing up and rounding her desk.

Your heart drops a little bit, thinking the worst.

Obviously, she didn’t want you to come. How could you be so stupid?

“I uhm. I brought you coffee! I’m sorry it’s- god I- this is silly I shouldn’t have come, you were obviously joking and I’m disturbing you I should- I’ll just go,“ you ramble, looking at anything but her.

You jump when you feel her hand wrap around your wrist. When the fuck had she gotten close? Was she a ninja? Your eyes dart to her face to see her…wait is she blushing?

You blink up at her, trying to figure out why she’s standing there, holding your wrist with a bashful smile on her face and a blush on her cheeks.

“Larissa? Are.. is everything okay?”

“You really are too sweet to me darling” she murmurs, squeezing your wrist. “I had thought you were just joking yesterday. I’m not used to people going out of their way for me like this.”

“Well, people are fucking stupid then.” You retort, “People should go to the ends of the earth just to talk to you. I know I would.”

“If you keep talking like that you’ll never get rid of me.” She mumbles, looking away.

“The day I want to be rid of you is the day I’ve been body snatched and replaced by an evil alien.”

She snorts at that, her nose scrunching in the most adorable way. And wow she really is close. You can see the slight crow’s feet at the corners of her eyes, the laugh lines around her mouth. Christ her mouth looks far too kissable right now. You look back at her eyes and, oh gods she is not allowed to look at you like that you really might just kiss her. Would she kiss you back? The way she’s looking at you has you thinking maybe she would. All it would take is for you to lean in just-

A loud thud breaks you both from your reverie. You turn to face where the noise came from and just manage to catch a glimpse of blonde hair darting around the corner. You really should’ve suspected your kind escorts were going to eavesdrop. While you feel a little mortified you can’t find it in yourself to be mad at them.

“I don’t suppose you found my office on your own?” Larissa asks.

“I was very kindly escorted by two of your students, they found me panicking at the front door.”

“I don’t suppose they were a moody goth and a bright bubbly girl?” She hums.

“Yep. That was them.”

She sighs, bringing a hand up to rub her temples while muttering something about walking trouble. You giggle, much to your utter mortification, before lifting up the bag you brought.

“Coffee?” You ask.

“God yes.” She sighs.

You reach into the bag and bring out the thermos you’d brought handing it to her with the dorkiest grin on your face. She thanks you before taking a sip and borderline moaning at the taste (yeah your face could give a furnace a run for its money right now).

“Anyway I uh,” you clear your throat. “I best be off. Wouldn’t want to keep you from your work.”

“Do you need to head back to the cafe?”

“Oh no I’m not working today, I just thought-“

“It seems a waste coming all this way to leave so soon no?” She asks. “Let me give you a tour.”

“Oh no it’s okay! I’m sure you have more important things to do-“

“Well, I think it’s rather important you let me show you around. Please?” She asks.

And goddamn you couldn’t say no to her if you were being held at gunpoint. And the idea of her wanting to spend time with you is making you swoon. So you agree, ducking your head in a nod so she won’t see how flustered you are by her simple gesture.

She presses her laptop shut and grabs the takeaway bag from your hand, placing it down on her desk, before gesturing to the door.

“After you sweetheart.”

[barrenclan]

begging some of yall not to idolize deepdark and defiance how you do. i have a friend who’s actually lived through a cult’s wrath and they r mega not cool. like i know defiance is narratively AMAZING but we. shouldn’t put it on a pedestal of “oh this thing is so cool and its leaders are amazing” because ultimately it’s safer for everyone if we start recognizing that while yea defiance + deepgang are cool… theyre still a cult. and we should not be viewing them positively at all. cults are inherently models of rigorous and severe repeated abuse, and by romanticizing them you are inherently romanticizing abuse. i don’t think you’re bad for letting this happen, raz, i just think that if you have any sympathy for cult survivors you should have stopped it before now. Especially as the comic ramps up towards the inevitable climax of the cult in it doing many awful things to the main characters. I know no one here intended to romanticize it, but by treating deepdark and other leaders of this cult as silly uwu murder cult guys we are actively doing that.

thank you for listening if you did, and i hope this feedback helps us all grow.

Well, thank you for sharing your concerns, I appreciate it a lot, as well as explaining the reasons this is important to you. Nothing you said is incorrect or invalid! I do have a few other thoughts I wanna share along with this ask.

Firstly; Defiance is fictional, and more than that it's not based on any real world cult. I obviously had to do some research and take some general real-world influence, mostly because I wanted to capture the kind of personality that exists in cult leaders with Deepdark, but in the end it's a completely made-up group. I actually based their group structure much more on a mafia-like organization than a traditional religious cult. There is a sliding scale for these sorts of things in stories of course, topics that are treated with varying levels of severity based on our culture, and everyone is going to be affected by them differently based on personal experience anyways. I refer to Defiance as a "combination death cult and mafia" sort of flippantly (which is my own fault) because just calling it a "group" is sort of vague, non-descript term. But its structure and actions are way, way more dramatic and obvious than any cult that exists today, or existed previously.

With the kind of fanbase I've gathered, I would like to believe my readership is able to separate the difference between talking about real-world cults and fictional ones. No one I've seen is actually idolizing Defiance as something to genuinely be admired, outside of talking about and making up in-universe characters who do so. Deepdark is fun, and dramatic, and over-the-top, because I made him that way, so it's natural that people like him. But no one is saying that it's good to be like Deepdark, or that he's some sort of aspirational goal (I hope! If you are, we'll have words!). I do believe that in the story itself I've pretty thoroughly conveyed how cruel and malicious Defiance & its members are. In fact I've pretty intensely tried to emphasize the insidious way that cults hurt people, and the danger of charismatic leaders like Deepdark! Maybe I've failed a bit in that regard, then.

But besides all that - your points are very valuable and worth repeating, and I will be more on the lookout for anything treating Defiance's impact irreverantly, and either delete or correct it. I have a feeling people are not going to be happy with them anyways, as they continue to hurt more of our main characters.

Real-life cults are not as obvious and over-dramatic like Defiance. Many ordinary people like you and me are deeply hurt by them all the time, and any time you joke about Deepdark's murdering or silly lieutenant shenanigans, it's always important to keep in mind that there are tons of real-life people like Deepdark out there. I never wanted to come across as unsympathetic for real-world victims of cults. Making people think more deeply about the various shades of gray and subtle acts of evil that exist in our world, as well as the inherent humanity that exists in people who do terrible things regardless, are some of my goals with creating PATFW in the first place.

[jtkys]

*chewing dice noises*

hmm I know I asked about this for Hobie- but how would the others react to the zoomies? Cause sometimes when I get the zoomies I do the cat thing, y’know when they hunch over and stuff, pointing their bootah toward you? I do that so much- just- imagine Miguel standing there watching us do that confused as F U C K

heheheheheheheheheheheheh ily pookie (all platonic! Ofc- just thought I’d say)

𝐇𝐄𝐋𝐏 𝐃𝐈𝐂𝐄 𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍 𝐔𝐑 𝐒𝐎 𝐅𝐔𝐍𝐍𝐘 𝐈𝐋𝐘 😭😭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐞 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐠𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐚 𝐛𝐞 𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐟𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐲 𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬 𝐢 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐝𝐢𝐝 𝐭𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐦𝐞 𝐀𝐆𝐄𝐒 𝐥𝐦𝐟𝐚𝐨𝐨

𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐳𝐨𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐢𝐠𝐮𝐞𝐥 𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞

✩☆ 𝐒𝐏𝐈𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐄 𝐏𝐄𝐎𝐏𝐋𝐄 𝐗 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐑.. 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐙𝐎𝐎𝐌𝐈𝐄𝐒!?!? 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍𝐒 ☆✩

𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐨 𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐢 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐢𝐭.

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞𝐝: 𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐬, 𝐠𝐰𝐞𝐧, 𝐦𝐢𝐠𝐮𝐞𝐥, 𝐩𝐚𝐯𝐭𝐢𝐫.

𝐇𝐎𝐁𝐈𝐄 𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐈𝐎𝐍 𝐈𝐒 𝐒𝐄𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐄 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐎𝐍 𝐌𝐘 𝐏𝐀𝐆𝐄!

★ 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐨𝐰...

❥ 𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐬

Finds your zoomies episodes very funny. The silly things you do entertain him and he finds it super cute

Ofc, he makes sure you don’t get hurt. His spidey senses are haywire when you’re running around and doing dumb shit, so he’s ready at any moment to grab you with a web and just lock you in his arms

In zoomies moments, he probably gets into tickle fights with you, he’s a giggly guy and he’s letting out the most adorable high pitched squeals as soon as you get him in the ribs

He finds it super entertaining and enjoys them, he’s got an infectious laugh so him cackling at your shenanigans gets you laughing too

If you ALSO have infectious laughter, it’s a neverending cycle. You’re just wheezing on the floor until someone steps in and gets one of you to stop laughing 😭

❥ 𝐆𝐰𝐞𝐧

She finds it cute likes miles does, she knows you have a lot of energy and you have to get it out somehow

Eventually, you and her start play fighting on the floor and she’ll hold you in her arms and pepper your face with kisses as you writhe (you don’t actually wanna get out, though..)

She’s also gonna laugh a bit like miles, but she’s less on edge about you getting hurt. She’s not against pinning you to the floor (affectionately) incase you do hurt yourself, though.

If you do get hurt and its nothing foo major she’ll giggle as she patches you up and kisses your forehead

“That was kinda deserved, babe. You were running around after all”

She doesn’t mean it, she’s only kidding <3

she doesn’t hate your zoomies moments, but she likes the calmer moments more: though she appreciates any time she spends with you.

…mostly when you’re not running around and bruising yourself to hell by bumping off furniture.

𝐌𝐢𝐠𝐮𝐞𝐥

Like you just said, my dice-eating friend, he is just…. Standing there

He has no idea wtf is going on or what on earth you’re doing that

Or why you’re running around and doing dumb shit

Admittedly, he finds it kinda cute. Prolly cause his daughter did similar stuff (HHAHA DAUGHTERLESS MAJOR L FOR U MIGGY JIGGY BIGGY WIGGY-WIGGSTER)

sorry the silly demons took over

Anyways. He has no idea what or why you’re doing what you’re doing, he’s just staring at you like

👁️👁️ w h a t

will probably just grab you and throw you over his shoulder and then wrap you up in blankets so you wriggle about like a worm

Then promptly drags you around (jokingly) while you’re wrapped in a plethora of blankets

he (did) have a daughter so he kinda has experienced the zoomies before. It makes him kinda emo cause it remind his of his daughter (rip miggy wiggy wiggesters daughter 💔💔💔 blud evaporated too soon 💔💔💔)

anyways i don’t really like miggy wiggy wiggster so uhm I’m abandoning him now :/

𝐏𝐚𝐯𝐭𝐢𝐫

Poor boy has NO IDEA what’s going on 😭😭

He’s not as blatantly unbothered/confused as miggy wiggy wiggster, he’s just like… huhhhhhhh…?

Finds it kinda cute when he realises you’re just in a hyper kinda mood.

He’s kinda paranoid about you getting hurt, a lot like miles, so he’ll probably go try and get you to stop, but he can’t grab you.

You seem to be like butter between his fingers, poor mans CANNOT CATCH YOU 😭

he just kinda has to wait for it to pass.. since he can’t do anything

But yeah he might giggle a bit, but eventually he catches you and just keeps you locked in his arms for the next hour in fear the zoomies will start again.

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾ ⋆⁺₊⋆

𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐝 𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐨𝐦𝐠!!!! 𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭, 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐬 𝐌𝐎𝐑𝐄 𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐬𝐡 💔 /𝐥𝐡.

𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐤 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠!! 𝐇𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐚 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐝𝐚𝐲/𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭, 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐲 𝐡𝐲𝐝𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐞. 𝐔𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐥 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 <𝟑𝟑

(づ￣ ³￣)づ

[nalpurex]

i got souyo brainworms again and i gotta share some thoughts i have

this ones a long one so ill put a 'keep reading' thing here just in case yall dont wanna scroll past a wall of text

basically some headcanons about a healthy mix of chad narukami and normal yu, injecting loads of gap moe into this guy

(and it eventually devolves into some weird semi-story because my brains really spiralling here)

okok so, hear me out, chad narukami isnt that bad as an idea...? maybe as a more calm iteration, just another layer to yu

in the p4 manga, we get to see some of yu's backstory. (its been a while since ive read it so i might get some details wrong but) his parents are very busy people, always working and moving around, so yu's always moving around with them

because of this, hes a very independent but also lonely kid. poor guy doesnt talk much with his own mom and dad, and he never really have a good enough chance to form lasting friendships

so when he moves to inaba and starts making friends there, hes like 'oh i really want to keep these guys around...' so he starts putting up a bit of a persona (hah), some cool, unfazed guy that everyone can rely on thinking thats what people might like more. to his credit, it works pretty well, but its a bit stifling for yu himself. hes never had this many friends though, so he'll keep it up

we all know yosuke admires him quite a fair bit as is, just as a dependable friend and a strong leader. he looks up to yu in these aspects, thinking hes basically the perfect guy. (and lets never unpack that thought.) talented, charming, 'gets all the ladies', that kind of stuff

at some point its just the two of them, maybe walking home from school or something, yu gets pretty comfortable and his facade slips a little. maybe he says something completely silly, or heavens forbid theres a stray cat along the road! ("awww look at the little guy, cmeree, pspsps- oh- ahem- uh, its pretty cute...") it surprises yosuke quite a bit. he's thinking about it a lot as they part ways, it was... definitely a new side to his partner, but its also not a bad thing...

after that, yosuke starts noticing more small things about yu. whenever he invites anyone to share his lunch, its always something they like. whenever the IT are talking, he makes sure no one feels left out. he likes cats, a lot more than hes willing to show, and he loves nanako a whole lot too. his partner's... a bit of a softie under that calm and collected vibe, isnt he?

(alternatively, it'd be really funny if the entire IT knew? like "yeah, hes got a straight face all the time and sparkles fly around him whenever he strikes a pose, but hes got a dedicated schedule for hanging out with us and hes always asking when we're free. hes a big puppy, really.")

anyways, yosuke tries to encourage him to show more of this other side of him. stuff like "c'mon, we'll think you're cool either way!" and yu at first is a little hesitant, so yosuke suggests he just try it out with him

he feels some pride about it, because hes the first to learn about this side of yu! his partner trusts him the most, hes the most comfortable around him! (whats this strange other feeling? hm. dont like that.)

yu takes a little more time with the others, but theyre very welcoming about it nonetheless. specifically, they find it very charming! (making cute shapes in your bento? sewing cute stuffed toys with kanji? playing with literally every single stray cat you lay your eyes on? hell yeag.)

of course the facade doesnt completely shatter, because some parts of it are still true to yu. its just that he'll now crack the dumbest joke youve heard in your life with the same old straight face

(aaand now to derail for the sappy stuff huhuhu)

because yosuke's usually the first to be exposed to whatever new shenanigans yu's up to, eventually he starts getting some... weirder things. he brings some of it up to the other IT members and he looks insane, like:

"what? he hasnt been giving you guys origami?"

"why would he? i mean itd be cool, but thats just his part-time job isnt it? hes probably sick of paper cranes!"

"cranes... haha, yeah..." (as he thinks about the row of stupid paper animals sitting on his windowsill)

yu over time starts getting real sweet with yosuke, and he kind of gets the feeling he should just... keep this to himself...? especially when he doesnt see him acting this way with anyone else, and a small part of him wants to keep it to himself. all of this, just for him.

but that would be kind of gay, wouldnt it? hes not gay, is he...? he gets pretty happy whenever yu smiles at him, whenever he does something for him, but its just because he appreciates him as his partner... right?

eventually it all comes to a head when yu invites him to that... that spot high up in inaba. (ykno the one, its got the railing and shit.)

yosuke's climbing the hill, wondering whats yu gonna tell him, and at the top he sees him already waiting there as the sun's about to set on a nice breezy day

he kinda jokes a bit about it, like "damn did you ask me to come here now for the atmosphere?" but yu's strangely quiet

so they kinda just stand in a bit of an awkward silence before yu clears his throat... and confesses to yosuke.

...

they just. stare at each other for a bit. yosuke's at a loss, heat slowly rising in his cheeks, because what the hell?

and then yu explodes into a flustered mess, bumbling about "hey yeah man you dont have to accept if you dont wanna, i was just saying things yknow? you dont really have to-"

yosuke cuts him off, sighing a little. he tells him its okay, hes kinda had a feeling he felt the same way but he wasnt ready yet... and now his partner's confessing to his face, he cant really put it off anymore, can he?

("by the way, did you plan this? like, the timing and everything?"

"i... had a hard enough time saying 'i like you' with a straight face as it was, i kind of had to..."

"... ah.")

[yanderemommabean]

Last post got be thinking about that silly trope where a hitman/assassin/murderer has to suddenly take care of a kid and all the shenanigans involved with trying to be nice/preserve their innocence despite the fact that they... You know... Kill people for a living.

Anyway thoughts about OCs and suddenly having to take care of a kid?

it's been on my mind, I had to make a small post to feed the worms eating my brain.

I think Jasper would be trying to preserve any innocence he could, he loves kids, he wants the world to be good for them for as long as possible. His childhood was ruined early but that doesn't mean he wants anyone else's to be broken apart either.

Lee would have tired dad energy the entire time, but he'd still love them and be sure they're safe and eating correctly. "Do your work yet? Did you brush your teeth and shower? Alright then, come here, let me show you some neat science experiments"

Grey would be a bit awkward, as he's terrified he might accidentally hurt them, he doesn't want to turn out like the family he barely remembers. So he'll chill with them, play games, try to be a good role model, but he feels like someone else would be better qualified

Dexter would be over the moon and wouldn't be capable of leaving them alone. He's always so proud of anything they make, if its a stick drawing he says it's better than Vincent and Picasso. Major Proud Dad Energy

Ezrol would be indifferent in the beginning. Annoyed and not wanting anything to do with the brat. But slowly he lets his heart melt and starts giving into small things such as silly cartoons or weird art projects they wanted to try. He acts like he threw away the "junk" but it's very clearly kept in his room on his dresser or wall. Always checks in on them as they grow up, wanting to cry like an actual parent as time passes because "They grow up so fast"

August is the cookie cutter perfect dad who makes sure to use manners, be polite, be kind, and clean up. He'll have his more strict moments sometimes, but he's a real loving father figure who wants to be sure the kid is happy healthy and knows they're safe and loved no matter what. Also a really good cook at BBQs. Wears the "best dad" aprons all the time.

CEO would be the spoiling type, but only after you've earned it so to speak. If you do your work you'll be rewarded. Might also really love wearing the dad outfits they pick out to match. I'm talking atrociously colored and doesn't even match but it's their outfit choice for him, so to him it's a great fashion statement.

Victoria is used to handing care off to nanny's and what not, but she'd try. She's so business oriented the CEO would love to hire her. she's a more strict mother figure, but it's so the kid can get ahead in life when they can. Thinks kids are gross personally but isn't going to be a bitch if asked to house and care for one, she'll just take a while to warm up and be a good influence is all.

-Mommabean

[savemeafruitjuice]

Lee Mikey 2012? Maybe he’s being annoying and the others get revenge

Sure thing! I'm getting a load of requests right now, but I'll try to write one every day or two!

Anyways I hope you enjoy!

Lee! Michelangelo

Ler! Raphael, Donatello, Leonardo

TW! Implied swearing

(this gif is so silly 👆🗣️‼️‼️)

It was another casual day, the turtle teens going about their lives. Leo was meditating, trying his best to figure out another one of Master Splinter's mysterious inquiries; Donnie was examining yet another Kraang machine and Raph was training, beating the crap out of a punching bag.

Everyone was doing something productive- except for Mikey. He hadn't been able to focus all day. Once one thing caught his interest it lost its spark after a couple minutes. Needless to say, he was bored.

The freckled turtle began humming yet another song, but ended up forgetting the rhythm, instead opting to just lay on the ground.

That is, until he got an idea.

Tiptoeing to his brother's room, Mikey snuck through the hallway in an attempt to distract himself. He made it into the room and immediately found what he was looking for: Spike. Raphael had always been protective of his pet tortoise, but because he wasn't in his room, he was free to play with him! Right?

Apparently not, because as soon as he had the reptile cradled in his arms, the fiery turtle bursted into the space, startling the orange-clad. "Mikey, do you mind telling me whaT THE F-" "Raphael. We do not use that language in this household."

An unexpected voice sounded right in Raph's ear. He jumped a little, although he immediately knew from the quiet tone that it was Leonardo. He let out a sigh, before remembering why he was mad in the first place. "Mikey came into my room without my permission! And even worse, he's messing with Spike! What if he hurts him?!"

While saying this, Leo sighed and gently took the said creature from Mikey, earning a little groan of annoyance as he was returned to Raphael. "Whatever. I'm boooored!" "Then just stop being bored." Raph deadpanned, a smug grin creeping up his face as his brothers rolled their eyes.

"Do you think if I scream really really loud, that pizza will start falling from the sky?" Leo and Raph looked in utter confusion and disbelief at who they were almost ashamed to call their brother. Almost. "What? What does that even mean?" both teens chimed in unison. "I dunno. I'm bored."

"Bored, huh?" a new voice approached, Donatello making his way towards the others with something that appeared complicated in hand. "Allow me to enlighten you on this new tech I'm working on. It's actually completely made of m-"

Donnie was cut off, Mikey jumping in the air with newfound energy. "Completely made out of burgers? Milkshakes? PIZZA?" "What? No, you numbskull. Never mind, you're not of the proper intelligence to understand anyways." the purple-masked turtle scoffed, though it didn't deter Mikey from being a pest for the time being.

"Your nerd stuff is boring anyways. I want something fun to do! Surely you could think of something, poindexter?" "Hey! That's rude!" conflict was building between the two, and Leo, unable to deal with yet another headache, had a plan that benefited all of them. Well, except for their ears.

"Alright, alright! That's enough!" the katana user pushed the brothers apart, directing their attention to him instead. "Mikey, if you want something fun to do, I'll give you something fun to do." and with that, Leonardo tackled his brother to the ground, seating himself upon his waist and pinning his flailing arms beneath his knees.

"Hey, not cool bro! What gives?" Mikey strained, attempting to free his arms, but to no avail. "Uh... Leo? What are you doing?" Raphael questioned, crossing his arms in confusion as he stared at the two. "Yeah, you're not gonna hurt him, are you?" the purple chimed in, slightly concerned as the leader of the group didn't usually participate in the whole 'Bullying Mikey shenanigans'.

"No, of course not." Leo waved them off, dismissing the turtles apparent concern. Mikey let out a sigh of relief. "I'm just going to... alleviate his boredom." he wiggled his fingers at Mikey's plastron, causing the youngest to let out a little "Eep!" while the others made the connection. Anticipatory giggles immediately came out of his mouth, evil smirks overcoming Raph and Donnie's faces.

"Youhu can't doho this! Lehet me gohoho!" Raphael stepped forward, cracking his knuckles. "No dice, man. You messed with Spike- now I'm gonna mess with you." and with that, fingers were digging into the trapped turtles rib-area, causing a loud shriek to bounce off the walls. Donatello flinched a little at the noise, but made his way over too as he recovered, setting his machinery down.

Leo smiled, glad that his brothers were agreeing on something- even if it was at Mikey's expense. The nunchuck-user was giggling his head off, laughter only intensifying as Donnie came forth and began poking various places on his plastron, taking note of the different reactions he caused.

Leo spidered along his brother's neck, startling slightly when he screeched. "You've been a pest all week. You had this coming." Raphael and Leonardo agreed, easily following the smallest's movements as he wiggled about.

"PleHEHEAse! Ihihi'm sOHORRY!" Mikey continued to evade his brother's hands, though it didn't do much. Legs kicked out as the turtle shut his eyes. When Leo switched to squeezing instead of spidering, his laughter increased tenfold, trying to tilt his head to one side to block the attack, only for the sensation to switch to the other side, the cycle continuing.

Donnie had moved down, experimentally squeezing the freckled-turtle's knee, carefully dodging a kick aimed at his head. Now Mikey was writhing. His knees were a definite bad spot for him, and he could only take so much before he started begging.

"DOHONIHIHIEE! STOHOHOHOP! IHI- I CAHAHAAN'T!" after glancing at his face, Raphael shrugged and dug into his armpits as Donnie let out a "Woop!" in celebration at his discovery. Leo, however didn't want to overdo it, and called them off.

"Okay guys, I don't think he can take much more. We'd better stop." their fingers slowed as Michelangelo gasped for air. The blue-themed turtle climbed off of him, patting his head. Donnie crawled forward to inspect his brother's face to make sure he was okay. Mikey curled in on himself, giggled slipping out every once in a while, but overall seemed okay. "You alright?"

"Yeah. Ihi'm fine. Thahanks Don." and with that, he let out a yawn, rolling onto his side. "Just don't try any funny business in my room again." Raph chimed in, all of the brothers watching as Mikey fell asleep.

"At least we tired him out for a while, huh?"

There we go! Didn't expect that one to be so long but whatevs! I hope you enjoyed more of my obsession-induced turtle chaos. 🤭

[mcbeetlebeeb]

OOOOkaay time to dump homestuck garbage on here cause although only my friends look at my barely active page, I can't ever garble my stupid gobbles out to my friends in actual person so here I am

anyways have some? domestic?? relationship? crap? headcannons 🤷

🫐John Eg fart bert☁️

typw of mfker to be out in public and just rest his head on your shoulder, causally getting groceries? in supermarket? head on shoulder. making fuckin pancake? head on shoulder. literally standing doing nothing? head on shoulder

even if he's shorter, he will do it,

don't doubt him

I think he'd have god awful pick up lines but not, like, offensive or crude, just plain stupif bad- some garbage like

"I'd bring you too the movies but they don't let you bring your own snacks :("

like sneaky almost, some would genuinely be so thought out it'd just smear right over your smooth brain

fuckin- breath pick up lines, always-

"I hope you know CPR! you just took my breath away!"

whata fuckin dork

but he takes pride in that and if your interested in him you automatically become a dork yourself

you can't not get looped in with his garbage movie taste and stupid shenanigans

silly pranks with him

he'd pull pranks on you, matter fact if your his partner he'd probably pull pranks on you the most

genuinely sucha simp-

not clingy simp or overbearing simp just, yknow, can't help but go on and on about his significant other if ever brought up in a situation, probably brings them up just to do that

I think hed show physical affection in soft, gentle ways? nervous.™

like im talking hesitantly moving to hold your hand, or doing that stupid move of yawning and placing your arm around the other person and bringing then closer

holding you by the sides of your arms, gently trailing down to hold your hands

so soft for you, an even bigger dork when its just yall, absolute bafoon, a fool for you I'd even say

he 100000% babbles about you to his friends, and your friends, and you- lmao, his whole friend group will and can not escape his wrath of adoring you

absolutely talking Jade and Rose's ear off about you cause Dave can't take another moment of it-

will tell you how amazing and cute and this and that you are

no hesitation

I think hed be more than comfortable with pda, holding hands?

yes.

face smooches?

absolutely.

picking you up like a damn bag of flour over his shoulder?

indeed.

🪅Gamzee Makara🧫 (gamgee maraca)

gonna be honest with you? probably a bit stinky

and not in like a swamp ass way like, he just distinctly smells like face paint and whatever who's guess at sopor slime smells like if it even has a smell-

mfker looms over you

he doesn't get like half of the words you say into his brain a lot of the time unless you specify its importance

he's trying his best

but regardless of not actually listening to your words, he loves listening to you talk, just speaking, he could stare at your face all day

like- in an unblinking manner but still lovingly

speaking of your face, that's what he'd mostly end up hugging, he's already hunched over a shit load so when he hugs you he just hugs your whole dome to his chest

probably garbles some silliness to you in a drunk/high like state, just holding you impossibly close to him and mumbling some junk like

"YoU..yOu GoT a NiCe..A nIcE fAcE..aNdD..sMeLl GoOd,,..WaRm"

I like to think the higher up on the hemospectrum(?) idk that trolls gradually get like more cold-blooded? if that makes sense?

okay like the higher it goes up the more the troll has a tough time gaining and keeping warm

he'd love warm stuff, like some big cat he'd just flop on it and purr away

you get clown makeup on your face each time he gives you a smooch, I don't make the rules

honestly would sniff you, and like, not subtly like straight "SNIIIFFFF"

can seamlessly re-create the actually honk squeek sound, but yknow, saying honk is much easier

and god forbid he finds you sitting or relaxing

all up in your biz, not like, verbally but he's already waddled over and rested his head on your lap or wrapping his arms around your waist and tugging you closer

I think hed be really mushy gushy over physical affection, not like embarrassed but he just enjoys it greatly and will do anything for you to play with his hair more

tbh a bit scary ngl, like, has that uh, union effect from Steven Universe, just sorta appears sometimes, there, observing,

he'd try and get you to eat sopor slime, he wouldnt force you but he'd definitely like, lean in with a tin of it and try and convince you, but he's not shoving it down ur gullet

probably great at taking snuggle naps, like he could most likely just drape all his limbs over you like some limp cat and just peacefully snooze away

also that whole shit of trolls having nightmares if not all snuggled up in sopor slime?

I love to believe it's canceled out by another person snuggling with them,

and that person is you of course,

you can't leave his presence without like a visable mark somewhere on you that you where around him

wether that be clown make up or sopor slime smeared somewhere on you

or you wearing his shirt, or his incredibly long pants

he's also a dork

I think hed enjoy how squishy humans are in general

he'd hold and love every part of you with a lopsided smile

hugging his arms around your hips as he leaves sloppy kisses against your tummy, smudging clown makeup on you

aahugh sleepiness is kicking in but I don't care I must persist because I'm. GAY.

Dave Strider (who names their child this)

breaking news! he's also a major dork

but in secret?

and an even bigger dork when its just yall

type of mfker to just pour his heart out to you in a way that makes you blank in the brain and then go "haha sorry that was weird" or "my bad that was probably cringe"

so unbelievably soft for you behind door, cannot do pda- for the life of him-

"hey, uh I made us a playli-" "YES."

listening to music with you at any given chance, likes sharing music genres and songs

if you dont make mention of him not smiling or laughing often around others he'll just let himself slip like that yknow?

like he'll giggle and laugh at more things, stupid, silly things,

comfortable with you to say the least

CAPE BLANKET, CAPE BLANKET, CAPE BLANKE-

like mentioned above- if you got the chance to snuggle up close to him he'd drape his silly cape over yall both,

mostly you but 🤷

probably had a god damn coronary trying to figure his feelings out

talking with Rose or John like

"I dunno the fucks wrong with me, my heart hurts and my gut feels likes its in knots like im gonna barf?- "

"you like them dave‐ you like _____."

"....i—.....whuh??-"

stammering and studdering round you like he has a speech impediment, has words in his head but just cannot execute them at all-

not with you around

it legit don't matter to him, he will call you bro, dawg, dude, homie, homeslice? home dawg?

probably would use these in an endearing way tho, just "dude?...bro?" in a loving way

"you have a smoochable face dude"

"...fruity.."

"fuck you-"

very hesitant on touching, not that he minds, he just will mentally perish if he ever made you feel weird

he'd definitely be the mfker to when cuddling with him to just to nestle and nuzzle the top of his head into the crook of your neck

mentioning cuddling- like whilst asleep, he'll still have a part of him touching you, wether it's his foot against your calf or his entire leg draped over you