#because the author cant read my mind so i have to say Something

[quaranmine]

i need to learn how to write normal person reviews on ao3 because my default review state is to write an entire essay about what i just read, which is FANTASTIC for authors, but half the time i'm reading late at night or i don't have the time to type it up, so instead what happens is that the fanfic languishes for months in my phone's browser tabs as a "reminder" for me to write that review essay i have in mind, but i never get back around to it.

so i need to just make myself write normal 1-2 sentence reviews even though i secretly want to write essays, because writing ANYTHING is ultimately better for the author than me just thinking about it and not actually doing it

[drchucktingle]

favorite author i have never read

hey there buckaroos thank you for all the DEEP DISCUSSIONS we are having a great time here on tumblr. thought today i could make a post that is slightly more difficult its not all sunshine days ahead and requires a little introspection. LOOK AT US we have all arrived here together through trust and love and i think we can keep this going. chuck made this post on other platforms years ago and i think it was said very well then and led to some good discussion, so i am going to repost here. okay lets go deep bud here we go:

i would like to spend moment today talking about common joke i hear online (and even too my face at conventions). this is jokerman way i hear ALL the dang time: 'chuck tingle is my favorite author i have never read' or less jokerman way but of ‘i have never read his books but i love chuck tingle'.

first of all, THANK YOU buds. this is not way of call out post to make you feel bad, i appreciate your way and understand you are trying to support. this is not attack on your message and from bottom of chucks heart THANK YOU.

BUT i have to say something about this. please consider what you are saying when you post this. would you send this as message to STEPHEN KING or NEIL GAIMAN or NK JEMISIN? i doubt this. it would seem VERY RUDE to message other authors. just imagine trotting up to a writer and saying ‘i would NEVER read your books haha’ but it is sent to chuck all the dang time.

obvious reason buds say it to chuck is that i am queer author with a unique way. yes i write in realm of wild fantasy and erotic pairings, but by saying ‘i have never read chuck BUT' you are really saying 'i am posting my support of this but PLEASE DONT THINK I AM REALLY INTERESTED IN THIS PERSONALLY.' there are similar distasteful jokes that i will not repeat involving saying 'no bud on bud pounds' after a sentence that works in similar way.

is sexual art really that bad? is queer art really that embarrassing? is unusual outsider art really that funny?

it is one thing if your preferred pound is not one of chucks tinglers, that is TOTALLY FINE BUD, but if you are an adult i would say 'is it REALLY that scary to read a book about a way of sex that is not yours? is it that difficult to think that something that seems silly to you could actually MOVE YOU in an important way? do you HAVE to disconnect yourself from lgtbqia art with a 'but i don't read this myself?'

keep in mind, there are gay tinglers, there are asexual tinglers, there are trans tinglers, there are select your own timeline tinglers, there are horror tinglers. TINGLERS FOR EVERY TASTE. the thing that buds are often REALLY saying with ‘favorite author i have never read’ is ‘this is WEIRD and dont be confused because im NOT WEIRD IM COOL DONT THINK I ACTUALLY LIKE THIS’. funny enough even the proudly fun and wild and unique buckaroos will STILL say this line, maybe without taking time to think of what it means or how rude it is?

WHY would you never read a chuck book? because my way is queer? because it is neurodivergent? even if that is not there reason or even if YOUR ARE ALSO PERSONALLY QUEER AND NEURODIVERGENT TOO, think about what the joke is IMPLYING.

is sincerely enjoying something thats kind of unusual that difficult? do we really have to slather it in irony and ‘so bad its good?’ before reposting?

in closing as man name of chuck i will say you can still make this joke if you want buckaroos i know you are just having a good time proving love in your own way. i am not upset with you bud and i appreciate your support in any way you give it. there are some buckaroos who just CANT AFFORD tinglers and that is an important way i understand as well. obviously this conversation does not apply to those buds. but for the rest of us trotting along, MAYBE think about what you are really saying with this jokerman way first, and MAYBE try cracking open a tingler because you might be surprised. its not that scary bud. thank you for listening

being sincere is VERY COOL and VERY PUNK ROCK. i encourage all buckaroos out there to give it a try.

LOVE IS REAL

[hiemaldesirae]

i have less than 24 hours left before i have to go through one of the most stressful days of my life so. heres a list of my fav radiostatic fic recs in no particular order

clarification: by radiostatic i mean fics where vox is 100% not the dom in the relationship. most of these dont contain explicit sex though, and im not recommending any straight porn fics here because you can easily find those with a click and search through the bottom vox tag lmao

most of these fics are unfinished, so be warned that i will not take accountability if you get attached to these without them being finished properly. in fact ill just laugh at you because then we'll be suffering together

now, that aside- starting off strong with some of the more popular fics:

RHTVS / Radio Healed the Video Star by Aspiring_Forest_Witch

notes: LONG fucking fic. like this guys almost 700k words long fic. one of the best things ive ever read in my life though and it has a plotline thats frankly more engaging than the actual showing of hazbin on amazon. so. you know. if you have the time to read it Please do you wont regret it

Unraveling Emotions by Xaelei

notes: one of my favourite fics ever on god. started my brainrot for dad!husk, portrays one of the most scrumptious radiostatic dynamics and is generally so very well written that i might end up trying to recreate one of the scenes in comic form. genuinely in love with this fic and im so glad i can say i was the first comment on this fic because my God its such a treat to see new chapters drop for this. unfortunately i havent had the time to write out a detailed comment as of now but if someone wants to let the author know that im still in love with their fic and will continue supporting it until i drop dead go ahead for me

Safe with Me by rillyrillo

notes: the prequel and main fic of this series is human radiostatic, though the sequel is set in hell. it comes with gorgeous gorgeous art and frankly one of the most exhilirating endings ive ever had the pleasure of witnessing play out. i recommend you guys check out their other fics too, the art continues in them + their radiostatic is written wonderfully across all universes!

A Month of Rut by Vylad

notes: this fic is very self indulgent to me. i love the way radiostatic is written in this one because theyre very soft and sweet, but others may not prefer it if theyre looking for freak4freak radiostatic. if you just want something to indulge in and relax with at the end of a heavy day though this is my #1 rec. i read this sometimes when i find myself crying at night lmao

Down, Up, and Back Down by CowboyEnthusiast

notes: made me sob like a baby. 10/10 no notes whatsoever read it for yourself because you WILL not regret it. i genuinely am always at a loss for words whenever i reread this because it is among the most gutwrenching but beautiful and poetic works that ive ever read and i think it deserves some recognition

Mind the Gap by ZLynn

notes: again, to reiterate, i do very much dislike the abusive!staticmoth portrayal i see in a lot of fics. but in this one... it's written so perfectly, i can definitely see it actually happening. i enjoy the way that val does still seem to care about vox, albeit in his own twisted way that eventually breaks and fractures their love and trust, and its just. Ugh. So fucking good

+ with the less popular but still wonderful depictions of radiostatic that i love to indulge in:

i'll give you a show (cause it helps fill the seats) by dead_and_dreaming

notes: absolutely shameless plug from me for my dear mk's work because i cant stop thinking about the way that she's portrayed al here. its actually insane how fucked up that stupid little deer is and i just. i really fucking love the way that their alastor is written, it's genuinely probably my Number One depiction of alastor ever. i demand more of this stupid little freak RIGHT NOW!!!!

Any of the fics by Rachello344 in the Hazbin Hotel Fandom Tag on their profile

notes: so remember when i told you guys i wouldnt be linking straight porn. looks away... okay in my defense though i read the smut for the characterization and their unique dynamics. its sooo interesting to see how their radiostatic is explored here and im honestly refreshed by the depiction of their relationship. im here for it !!!

The Read 'Em and Weep Series by TooManyPseudonyms

notes: so from what i was able to piece together (everything flies over my head when im reading, forgive me for my low media literacy) this is an au set before the hotel where (in the first work) al and vox are in a qpr relationship. in the second work this evolves into a romantic relationship, and the exploration of their dynamic through this is just... Yeah. please read it its 100% worth your time and so underrated it hurts my heart

Uneasy by Saezs

notes: this fic is one of the first radiostatic fics i read (the others being RHTVS and... i think i tried the 666 series, but it didnt appeal to me lol) and its actually just wonderful. i really love saezs's genderfluid vox and how supportive the other vees are of them <3 their portrayl of the characters puts a smile on my face whenever i reread their work

Heat Waves by HappyPRAWN

notes: i'll be fr dsmptsd hit me like a truck when i read the title but it is such an interesting debut! only at one chapter as of me making this post but the way the author wrote this is so engaging and it really makes me wonder what they have next in store for the fic

Do I have your attention now? by Chi_Chi25

notes: wow no way we have the same name... anyway ahem. ill be completely honest this ones a bit of a guilty pleasure for me. this fic is a bit fragmented and short, so for people who click off fics when they see imperfect grammar this one may not be for you. however if you can look past that, it has an engaging storyline and quite the juicy concept :)

Killer Ex by FanGirl48

notes: gorgeous, gorgeous little human! radiostatic oneshot. i love the relationship that vox and al have here... the reasons why they both stayed away from each other even though theyre still so very clearly down bad for each other... anyway. i think about this one a lot and i still go back to reread it sometimes lol

Negotiations by FanGirl48

notes: i didnt realize until i started making this list that this fic was also written by fangirl48.... go off queen keep feeding us (me). this one was a fic recommended to me initially by link nonny, and i can 100% vouch for how good it is. its got appletv interactions, radiostatic plus lucifer trying to navigate heaven, angels... basically everything needed for a very varied and well packed with flavour story

The diary of a Serial Killer by ShippersCave

notes: okay im running out of brain juice at this point but. yeah this fic is soooo self indulgent to me. this ones another human au, with al as a serial killer and vox as the journalist trying to conduct interviews with him. its got SUCH a good dynamic between al and vox, i encourage you guys to check it out and give it a chance even if youre not really into human aus.

My heart's been pierced by Cupid by ShippersCave

notes: pirate/siren au !!!!!!!!! RAAHH !!!!! i dont have to say anything else for this if thats not enough to get you to click then i dont know what is

System Shutdown by Swoolie

notes: i cant believe i nearly forgot about this one LMAO... vox goes onto a temporary hiatus and everyone goes crazy about it. im not really sure if this counts as radiostatic frankly because of the way its tagged but its so good i think you should give it a read anyway

Together in Radio Static by Anonymous

notes: QPR media husbands radiostatic au !!!! i love this one especially because it opens off with vox slapping alastor across the face for leaving him LMAOO (deserved)

What Has Been by Tianren

notes: another human au (YEAH YEAH I KNOW. JUST HEAR ME OUT OKAY i swear im cooking) look, as someone with religious trauma deeper than i can properly express and the worlds fifteenth worst parental issues, the depiction of vox in this fic just really hits home. i really adore the exploration of voxs past and how the themes of religious guilt and cults are woven in so far- and it blends very seamlessly with their human au, despite the characters eccentricities

you're too sweet for me by awestruck_atrophy and moonbeanies

notes: basically, vox and al make a deal where vox tries to help him out of the shackles or whatever that are bound to him because of his stupid dumbass lusting for power. its very intriguing so far and i love the setup and worldbuilding the authors have done, so you should check it out if you want a unique perspective on radiostatics relationship

candlelight by curtailed

notes: the best way i can think of to describe this one is like... fake marriage but instead of fake marriage its. fake roommates??? the author probably puts it better than me tbh. its super interesting so far, i cant wait to see where this one is headed especially with how unique its premise is!

Zero Day by Anonymous

notes: this one is like those time regression manhwas. you know, the ones where the protag goes back in time and proceeds to try and avoid everyone who made their life miserable- only to fail because for some reason now they're paying attention to them more than they would have had they stayed the same person. its certainly very promising, though! i do love indulging in time regression stories, especially when the mc is someone i love like vox. i really cant wait to see which direction this one is headed in :)

Never as Good as the First Time by IComeForFanficsNowin403

notes: okay. so, uh. um. so- this one is in spanish. HOWEVER its premise (serial killer alastor meets television star (?? i think. its not quite clear) at a party hosted by rosie, moves into his neighborhood to keep an eye on the pretty prey) is just so unique i honestly think its worth the experience to pull out google translate and try living the machine translated life. really. give it a chance. also its got beautiful art to go along with, so.. you know. thats just a bonus!

+ honorary staticmoth and one-sided/past radiostatic fic rec:

Freak-A-Zoid by Femalefonzie

notes: this fic deserves every single piece of praise its ever gotten because good lord. its SO good. i was not seeing the radiostatic twist come in, but it *is* mostly staticmoth. and also a/b/o but i mean. who *hasnt* indulged in a little bit of a/b/o before honestly

there are other fics that i personally like to indulge in, but i frankly wouldnt recommend to anyone else because they're either the kinds of fics that i myself can only bring myself to read after ive spent 8 hours at work crying into my pillow and need to look at something entertaining, or when im starved of content and cant be bothered to cook myself so i pull out the translator and start going at it. (technically i should know how to read french by now but. urgh. anywway..)

[dilvuc]

Hello! I love your writing style! You're one of my favorite TWST writers right now :D! And i have a request for you if you dont mind! (I read your pinned so no worries)

Idia/Leona (if you can do both of them separately but if you cant, just go with Idia!) with a reader (m) that has a floating jade chamber/castle similar to Ningguang's jade chamber. And the reader is a silly loaded rich dude who cosplays.

The reader could be showing Idia (with/and Leona) his floating castle for the first time, and they went to his enormous room where he cosplays. Because theres wigs and costumes everywhere along side with merch from their favorite games

(pls tell me if this isnt specific enough! I might give a more descriptive request ^^)

@cyevvierrrr

❝RICH COSPLAYER❞

𝖌𝖊𝖓𝖗𝖊: fluff

𝖌𝖊𝖓𝖉𝖊𝖗: male

𝖙𝖎𝖙𝖑𝖊: rich cosplayer

𝖕𝖆𝖗𝖎𝖓𝖌: idia x m!reader

𝖜𝖆𝖗𝖓𝖎𝖓𝖌: none

𝖘𝖚𝖒𝖒𝖆𝖗𝖞: you decided to show idia around at your home. he was shocked to find out that you own the jade chamber and was a cosplayer

“So…where is this home of yours…?” idia asked as you led him to the yiyan temple. the male looks up at the temple in awe, “I-is this…?”

“We’re not there yet…” you smiled. idia tilted his head, “Then why did we stop here?”

“Look up.” you pointed up. the flame haired male looked up at the sky and to his surprise, there was a floating building high up into the sky. he had so many questions. how are they floating? are they using magic? what's the secret behind it?!

“H-h-how?!” idia gawked. you gently grabbed idia’s hand and lead him on a floating pillar, making squeak in fear and cling onto you.

“How about you just close your eyes and think of something that might overcome your fear of height?” you requested. just as you say, idia closes his eyes. he let out a soft squeak when he felt the pillar move upwards. it may not take long until you tell him to open his eyes, “You can open your eyes now…”

idia opened his eyes and find himself at the castle. he was still kinda nervous about staying on high ground. you gently rub the male's back, “Let just head inside, shall we?”

“S-sure…” idia nodded as you gently grabbed his hand and led him inside your home. to his surprise, the interior is huge and luxurious. he never realizes you'll be this rich. although, he was wondering what you're gonna show him. you lead him to your bedroom and allow him to sit on your bed.

“Um…What are you trying to show me?” idia tilted his head. you grinned as you walked over to your closet, “I thought I could surprise you with something. Hope you enjoy it~”

“???”

you opened up your closet and revealed a bunch of cosplay costumes. idia gasped with excitement when he saw your cosplay, “No way! No way! Are these…?!”

“Yep. You see some shorts on Magicam, right?” you asked the male.

idia gawked, “It was you?! That cosplayer who dressed up as my favorite characters?! Y-y-you look pretty!! I mean— Cool!”

you laughed at idia's red face, “Thanks. Glad you love it that much. Hey…Would you like to try it out?”

“I-I'm good, but you won't mind me taking some pictures to treasure it?” idia blushed, holding out his phone. you winked, “Whatever you want. So, what do you suggest?”

“Oh! [Your favorite anime character]!” idia suggested with excitement.

“Hai~”

╰┈➤ author note: please note that this is a slow update. i will still accept your request, but it will take a while since i'll be working on my books on wattpad. if you wish to read those books, here's my wattpad account.

twst masterlist

rules

[soracities]

Hey! It has been on my mind lately and i just wanna ask..idk if it would make sense but i just noticed that nowadays ppl cant separate the authors and their books (ex. when author wrote a story about cheating and ppl starts bashing the author for romanticizing cheating and even to a point of cancelling the author for not setting a good/healthy example of a relationship) any thoughts about it?

I have many, many thoughts on this, so this may get a little unwieldy but I'll try to corall it together as best I can.

But honestly, I think sometimes being unable to separate the author from the work (which is interesting to me to see because some people are definitely not "separating" anything even though they think they are; they just erase the author entirely as an active agent, isolate the work, and call it "objectivity") has a lot to do with some people being unable to separate the things they read from themselves.

I'm absolutely not saying it's right, but it's an impulse I do understand. If you read a book and love it, if it transforms your life, or defines a particular period of your life, and then you find out that the author has said or done something awful--where does that leave you? Someone awful made something beautiful, something you loved: and now that this point of communion exists between you and someone whose views you'd never agree with, what does that mean for who you are? That this came from the mind of a person capable of something awful and spoke to your mind--does that mean you're like them? Could be like them?

Those are very uncomfortable questions and I think if you have a tendency to look at art or literature this way, you will inevitable fall into the mindset where only "Good" stories can be accepted because there's no distinction between where the story ends and you begin. As I said, I can see where it comes from but I also find it profoundly troubling because i think one of the worst things you can do to literature is approach it with the expectation of moral validation--this idea that everything you consume, everything you like and engage with is some fundamental insight into your very character as opposed to just a means of looking at or questioning something for its own sake is not just narrow-minded but dangerous.

Art isn't obliged to be anything--not moral, not even beautiful. And while I expend very little (and I mean very little) energy engaging with or even looking at internet / twitter discourse for obvious reasons, I do find it interesting that people (online anyway) will make the entire axis of their critique on something hinge on the fact that its bad representation or justifying / romanticizing something less than ideal, proceeding to treat art as some sort of conduit for moral guidance when it absolutely isn't. And they will also hold that this critique comes from a necessarily good and just place (positive representation, and I don't know, maybe in their minds it does) while at the same time setting themselves apart from radical conservatives who do the exact same thing, only they're doing it from the other side.

To make it abundantly clear, I'm absolutely not saying you should tolerate bigots decrying that books about the Holocaust, race, homophobia, or lgbt experiences should be banned--what I am saying, is that people who protest that a book like Maus or Persepolis is going to "corrupt children", and people who think a book exploring the emotional landscape of a deeply flawed character, who just happens to be from a traditionally marginalised group or is written by someone who is, is bad representation and therefore damaging to that community as a whole are arguments that stem from the exact same place: it's a fundamental inability, or outright refusal, to accept the interiority and alterity of other people, and the inherent validity of the experiences that follow. It's the same maniacal, consumptive, belief that there can be one view and one view only: the correct view, which is your view--your thoughts, your feelings.

There is also dangerous element of control in this. Someone with racist views does not want their child to hear anti-racist views because as far as they are concerned, this child is not a being with agency, but a direct extension of them and their legacy. That this child may disagree is a profound rupture and a threat to the cohesion of this person's entire worldview. Nothing exists in and of and for itself here: rather the multiplicity of the world and people's experiences within it are reduced to shadowy agents that are either for us or against us. It's not about protecting children's "innocence" ("think of the children", in these contexts, often just means "think of the status quo"), as much as it is about protecting yourself and the threat to your perceived place in the world.

And in all honestt I think the same holds true for the other side--if you cannot trust yourself to engage with works of art that come from a different standpoint to yours, or whose subject matter you dislike, without believing the mere fact of these works' existence will threaten something within you or society in general (which is hysterical because believe me, society is NOT that flimsy), then that is not an issue with the work itself--it's a personal issue and you need to ask yourself if it would actually be so unthinkable if your belief about something isn't as solid as you think it is, and, crucially, why you have such little faith in your own critical capacity that the only response these works ilicit from you is that no one should be able to engage with them. That's not awareness to me--it's veering very close to sticking your head in the sand, while insisting you actually aren't.

Arbitrarily adding a moral element to something that does not exist as an agent of moral rectitude but rather as an exploration of deeply human impulses, and doing so simply to justify your stance or your discomfort is not only a profoundly inadequate, but also a deeply insidious, way of papering over your insecurities and your own ignorance (i mean this in the literal sense of the word), of creating a false and dishonest certainty where certainty does not exist and then presenting this as a fact that cannot and should not be challenged and those who do are somehow perverse or should have their characters called into question for it. It's reductive and infantilising in so many ways and it also actively absolves you of any responsibility as a reader--it absolves you of taking responsibility for your own interpretation of the work in question, it absolves you of responsibility for your own feelings (and, potentially, your own biases or preconceptions), it absolves you of actual, proper, thought and engagement by laying the blame entirely on a rogue piece of literature (as if prose is something sentient) instead of acknowledging that any instance of reading is a two-way street: instead of asking why do I feel this way? what has this text rubbed up against? the assumption is that the book has imposed these feelings on you, rather than potentially illuminated what was already there.

Which brings me to something else which is that it is also, and I think this is equally dangerous, lending books and stories a mythical, almost supernatural, power that they absolutely do not have. Is story-telling one of the most human, most enduring, most important and life-altering traditions we have? Yes. But a story is also just a story. And to convince yourself that books have a dangerous transformative power above and beyond what they are actually capable of is, again, to completely erase people's agency as readers, writers' agency as writers and makers (the same as any other craft), and subsequently your own. And erasing agency is the very point of censors banning books en masse. It's not an act of stupidity or blind ignorance, but a conscious awareness of the fact that people will disagree with you, and for whatever reason you've decided that you are not going to let them.

Writers and poets are not separate entities to the rest of us: they aren't shamans or prophets, gifted and chosen beings who have some inner, profound, knowledge the rest of us aren't privy to (and should therefore know better or be better in some regard) because moral absolutism just does not exist. Every writer, no matter how affecting their work may be, is still Just Some Guy Who Made a Thing. Writing can be an incredibly intimate act, but it can also just be writing, in the same way that plumbing is plumbing and weeding is just weeding and not necessarily some transcendant cosmic endeavour in and of itself. Authors are no different, when you get down to it, from bakers or electricians; Nobel laureates are just as capable of coming out with distasteful comments about women as your annoying cousin is and the fact that they wrote a genre-defying work does not change that, or vice-versa. We imbue books with so much power and as conduits of the very best and most human traits we can imagine and hope for, but they aren't representations of the best of humanity--they're simply expressions of humanity, which includes the things we don't like.

There are some authors I love who have said and done things I completely disagree with or whose views I find abhorrent--but I'm not expecting that, just because they created something that changed my world, they are above and beyond the ordinarly, the petty, the spiteful, or cruel. That's not condoning what they have said and done in the least: but I trust myself to be able to read these works with awareness and attention, to pick out and examine and attempt to understand the things that I find questionable, to hold on to what has moved me, and to disregard what I just don't vibe with or disagree with. There are writers I've chosen not to engage with, for my own personal reasons: but I'm not going to enforce this onto someone else because I can see what others would love in them, even if what I love is not strong enough to make up for what I can't. Terrance Hayes put perfectly in my view, when he talks about this and being capable of "love without forgiveness". Writing is a profoundly human heritage and those who engage with it aren't separate from that heritage as human because they live in, and are made by, the exact same world as anyone else.

The measure of good writing for me has hardly anything to do with whatever "virtue" it's perceived to have and everything to do with sincerity. As far as I'm concerned, "positive representation" is not about 100% likeable characters who never do anything problematic or who are easily understood. Positive representation is about being afforded the full scope of human feelings, the good, the bad, and the ugly, and not having your humanity, your dignity, your right to exist in the world questioned because all of these can only be seen through the filter of race, or gender, religion, or ethicity and interpreted according to our (profoundly warped) perceptions of those categories and what they should or shouldn't represent. True recognition of someone's humanity does not lie in finding only what is held in common between you (and is therefore "acceptable", with whatever you put into that category), but in accepting everything that is radically different about them and not letting this colour the consideration you give.

Also, and it may sound harsh, but I think people forget that fictional characters are fictional. If I find a particularly fucked up relationship dynamic compelling (as I often do), or if I decide to write and explore that dynamic, that's not me saying two people who threaten to kill each other and constantly hurt each other is my ideal of romance and that this is exactly how I want to be treated: it's me trying to find out what is really happening below the surface when two people behave like this. It's me exploring something that would be traumatizing and deeply damaging in real life, in a safe and fictional setting so I can gain some kind of understanding about our darker and more destructive impulses without being literally destroyed by them, as would happen if all of this were real. But it isn't real. And this isn't a radical or complex thing to comprehend, but it becomes incomprehensible if your sole understanding of literature is that it exists to validate you or entertain you or cater to you, and if all of your interpretations of other people's intentions are laced with a persistent sense of bad faith. Just because you have not forged any identity outside of this fictional narrative doesn't mean it's the same for others.

Ursula K. le Guin made an extremely salient point about children and stories in that children know the stories you tell them--dragons, witches, ghouls, whatever--are not real, but they are true. And that sums it all up. There's a reason children learning to lie is an incredibly important developmental milestone, because it shows that they have achieved an incredibly complex, but vitally important, ability to hold two contradictory statements in their minds and still know which is true and which isn't. If you cannot delve into a work, on the terms it sets, as a fictional piece of literature, recognize its good points and note its bad points, assess what can have a real world impact or reflects a real world impact and what is just creative license, how do you possible expect to recognize when authority and propaganda lies to you? Because one thing propaganda has always utilised is a simplistic, black and white depiction of The Good (Us) and The Bad (Them). This moralistic stance regarding fiction does not make you more progressive or considerate; it simply makes it easier to manipulate your ideas and your feelings about those ideas because your assessments are entirely emotional and surface level and are fuelled by a refusal to engage with something beyond the knee-jerk reaction it causes you to have.

Books are profoundly, and I do mean profoundly, important to me-- and so much of who I am and the way I see things is probably down to the fact that stories have preoccupied me wherever I go. But I also don't see them as vital building blocks for some core facet or a pronouncement of Who I Am. They're not badges of honour or a cover letter I put out into the world for other people to judge and assess me by, and approve of me (and by extension, the things I say or feel). They're vehicles through which I explore and experience whatever it is that I'm most caught by: not a prophylactic, not a mode of virtue signalling, and certainly not a means of signalling a moral stance.

I think at the end of the day so much of this tendency to view books as an extension of yourself (and therefore of an author) is down to the whole notion of "art as a mirror", and I always come back to Fran Lebowitz saying that it "isn't a mirror, it's a door". And while I do think it's important to have that mirror (especially if you're part of a community that never sees itself represented, or represented poorly and offensively) I think some people have moved into the mindset of thinking that, in order for art to be good, it needs to be a mirror, it needs to cater to them and their experiences precisely--either that or that it can only exist as a mirror full stop, a reflection of and for the reader and the writer (which is just incredibly reductive and dismissive of both)--and if art can only exist as a mirror then anything negative that is reflected back at you must be a condemnation, not a call for exploration or an attempt at understanding.

As I said, a mirror is important but to insist on it above all else isn't always a positive thing: there are books I related to deeply because they allowed me to feel so seen (some by authors who looked nothing like me), but I have no interest in surrounding myself with those books all the time either--I know what goes on in my head which is precisely why I don't always want to live there. Being validated by a character who's "just like me" is amazing but I also want--I also need-- to know that lives and minds and events exist outside of the echo-chamber of my own mind. The mirror is comforting, yes, but if you spend too long with it, it also becomes isolating: you need doors because they lead you to ideas and views and characters you could never come up with on your own. A world made up of various Mes reflected back to me is not a world I want to be immersed in because it's a world with very little texture or discovery or room for growth and change. Your sense of self and your sense of other people cannot grow here; it just becomes mangled.

Art has always been about dialogue, always about a me and a you, a speaker and a listener, even when it is happening in the most internal of spaces: to insist that art only ever tells you what you want to hear, that it should only reflect what you know and accept is to undermine the very core of what it seeks to do in the first place, which is establish connection. Art is a lifeline, I'm not saying it isn't. But it's also not an instruction manual for how to behave in the world--it's an exploration of what being in the world looks like at all, and this is different for everyone. And you are treading into some very, very dangerous waters the moment you insist it must be otherwise.

Whatever it means to be in the world, it is anything but straightforward. In this world people cheat, people kill, they manipulate, they lie, they torture and steal--why? Sometimes we know why, but more often we don't--but we take all these questions and write (or read) our way through them hoping that, if we don't find an answer, we can at least find our way to a place where not knowing isn't as unbearable anymore (and sometimes it's not even about that; it's just about telling a story and wanting to make people laugh). It's an endless heritage of seeking with countless variations on the same statements which say over and over again I don't know what to make of this story, even as I tell it to you. So why am I telling it? Do I want to change it? Can I change it? Yes. No. Maybe. I have no certainty in any of this except that I can say it. All I can do is say it.

Writing, and art in general, are one of the very, very, few ways we can try and make sense of the apparently arbitrary chaos and absurdity of our lives--it's one of the only ways left to us by which we can impose some sense of structure or meaning, even if those things exists in the midst of forces that will constantly overwhelm those structures, and us. I write a poem to try and make sense of something (grief, love, a question about octopuses) or to just set down that I've experienced something (grief, love, an answer about octpuses). You write a poem to make sense of, resolve, register, or celebrate something else. They don't have to align. They don't have to agree. We don't even need to like each other much. But in both of these instances something is being said, some fragment of the world as its been perceived or experienced is being shared. They're separate truths that can exist at the same time. Acknowledging this is the only means we have of momentarily bridging the gaps that will always exist between ourselves and others, and it requires a profound amount of grace, consideration and forbearance. Otherwise, why are we bothering at all?

[jwirecs]

RECOMMENDED SEVENTEEN FICS OF JULY 2023💖

hello, hello! here are my recs for seventeen for july! hopefully these beautiful stories get more recognition as well as the writers 💝

** anything in parentheses and bolded are my thoughts that can be disregarded if needed **

🔞smut || 💔angst || 💕fluff || ✅completed || 🔄ongoing || 💯favorite

Admire Me (Like I Do For You) || @wheeboo💕✅

↳ in which seungcheol shows you his tattoos. 

Dimple || @icyminghao💕✅

↳ you can’t sleep, so you try touching seungcheol’s dimple just for the fun of it (spoiler: he loves it)

Shave || @yikesmary💕✅💯

↳ with your boyfriend’s comeback approaching, mingyu asks you to help with shaving.

The Stars And You || @wheeboo💕✅

↳ in which you bring the stars to your boyfriend for his birthday. (to this author, i am so sorry, but 90% of the fics that i have read from you so far, most of them are on this list. keep doing what youre doing please. i love them)

Try Me || @cheolhub🔞✅

↳ you push your sweet boyfriend a little too far when you threaten to fuck his business partner at dinner. he decides to show both you and mingyu who you belong to. (oh lord, heaven have mercy.)

Ukiyo || @wheeboo💕💔✅

↳ in which you and minghao spend the day together.

Wonwoo's Tasty Cereal (And Milk) || @twogyuu💕✅

↳ You've been eating cereal wrong your entire life. Wonwoo and your niece are going to fix that.

Fake Dating Roommates || @yikesmary💕🔄💯💯

↳ in which choi seungcheol becomes your roommate and fake boyfriend in one fell swoop. and you still don't know how it happened.

Seventeen As Fake Dating Scenarios || @bluehoodiewoozi💕✅

↳ (title says it all and i am out here fulfilling my delulu side of my brain. doing great out here im telling you)

Baby, All I Really Want Is Your Attention || @viastro💕✅

↳ you and mingyu have been academic rivals since the beginning of your high school career. having always aimed for the #1 spot, mingyu would beat you without even needing to study. now dedicating all your time into studying at the local library, you find yourself wondering who keeps neatly packing your things and waking you up each time you fall asleep while studying. (hes so soft, i cant)

Catnaps || @wheeboo💕✅

↳ in which you volunteer at the local cat shelter with your crush.

Dating Seventeen (Hyung Line) || @wqnwoos💕✅

↳ (out here filling my delulu brain. also seungcheol does radiate sugar daddy tho, ngl)

Fix You || @smileysuh🔞💕💔✅💯💯

↳ “As a member of 53V3NT33N, I have two different states of mind coded into me, aggression and admiration. To love something, to admire it, is to feel aggressive when it’s questioned, to want to control it, if even for a little while- it’s the need to consume it, endlessly, as my fans consume and control me as an automaton. Even though I’m a member of a group, there’s a distance. Automatons can never truly motivate each other because our motivations are based on external human needs, it’s built into us- We can see when humans need us, and we do what we can to fix that need… I know you need me, the way I’ve needed you since I got here.” (god, yall dont even know how much i freaking love their fics. like bro, ily)

Gamers Do it Better || @sluttyminghao🔞✅💯

↳ (listen, just hear me out. tag teamed by the two lord saviors of svt's hhu. i really need like a threesome au/tag or something i swear.)

Hits Different || @hellohannie💕💔✅

↳ it was no secret that you had dated many people in your past. when you were with them, you believed you loved them and they loved you. when you broke up, you realized that they didn't truly love you. but you still believed that love was real. then, you met lee chan. when he broke up with you, you started to question if love truly did exist after all. (i need me some more dino fics cause i barely come across any)

Loving Him Was Red || @boowanie💕💔✅💯

↳ After the café you were part-timing at suddenly closes, you were left unemployed and broke as you tried your best to look for a new job. But when your best friend suggests an alternative way of earning money, you suddenly find yourself falling for a certain Jeon Wonwoo.

Pup Code || @beefboyandbabygirl🔞💕✅💯💯💯

↳ mingyu doesn't have crushes. he likes avril lavigne and sometimes he fucks pretty girls. but you seem to stir something in him that no one else can. without the trusty girl code, mingyu makes his own code to help you fall in love with him. (yall need to read this one. like read it cause i lowkey can imagine him making up his own code ngl. man has no self control sometimes)

Crossing Boundaries || @wonusite🔞💕✅

↳ Seungcheol has always demanded that all of his employees keep professional boundaries, but it frustrates him that his son’s nanny is a little too good at keeping things professional. 

Happy (First) Fathers' Day || @icyminghao💕✅

↳ it’s fathers’ day, but you seem to be more fixated on an event for your newborn daughter, much to mingyu’s dismay.

Made With Love || @icyminghao💕✅

↳ joshua wakes up to quite the commotion, and you’re not by his side.

The Cake In the Back || @toruro🔞💕✅

↳ cheol is a regular at your bakery, and it's all because his son loves the banana bread you make—at least that's what he tells himself. it also doesn't hurt that you're cute. and polite. and totally someone he'd like to fuck.

Roommates With Benefits || @shuaflix🔞💕✅

↳ initially, wonwoo doesn’t think much about your incessant requests to play on his xbox. however, when what was supposed to be a two-hour visit to his place stretches out for two weeks, he starts to think you’re overstaying your welcome.

The Secrets Kept From Roommates || @cheolism🔞💕✅

↳ you are hiding a secret from mingyu. little do you know that he's hiding one from you too.

Broken Pieces || @bluehoodiewoozi💕💔✅💯💯💯

↳ Your friend broke your soulmate's heart, leaving you to pick up the pieces of both his and your own heart. (stop my heart, i cant)

Right? Right. || @bluehoodiewoozi💕💔✅

↳ Your soulmate mark might be broken, but at least he will always be there for you.

Do check out all of the other seventeen fics that i have reblogged as well!!

** if there is any fics that you guys would like to recommend, please do! i am slowly running out of fics to read **

[pupupuphuca]

decided to do some fun miscellaneous twilight related facts about myself ⬇️

1. i have a pinterest board named “yes my vampires sparkle”. i have hundreds of photos of ashley greene and jackson rathbone from almost every angle for reference. i have cute moments of other characters too ofc.

2. i think my artworks are out of character. my drawings are my own interpretation inspired from fics. i cant draw consistent faces or get it close to my imagination. also its because

3. ive never read the books. I’M SORRY. i watched the movies and went straight to jalice fanfiction. also after i got on twilight tumblr i discovered the difference between the books and the movies, and i read metas, and thought my interpretation of the characters is so different from the books. so… yeah. also there’s not enough jalice moments in the books anyway amirite?

4. i got on tumblr and ao3 because of jalice. i had a tumblr account and knew about ao3 but have never read fanfiction that much. so the fandom culture on tumblr was mind blowing for me.

5. i love love love jalice fanfiction. urgh cant say it enough. some fics i read over and over ive memorized them. i have so many scenes i may never able to draw 😭

6. and so, getting interactions from fanfic authors is WILD for me. cant thank you all enough.

7. this is embarrassing but, one of my motivation is i wanna be THAT artist in the fandom (including but not limited to jalice hehe). i wanna contribute, i wanna draw characters exactly how i imagine them, i wanna make people feel something. and so i think my art has improved a lot while drawing jalice.

thank you again, for just being here, making up this lovely fandom, for writing fics, for giving me many treasured moments for the past 2 years.

[mugentakeda]

Do you have any fic recs similar to your take on iroh? Treating him as an actual character with some fucked up issues is SO much more fun!! I love him and I am chewing on your art

YES!!!!!!!! everytime i post about shithead iroh moments i get nervous someones gonna think i dont like him or im anti iroh or whatever but i genuinely honest to god think his less than savory past and personality traits ON TOP of the things about him that make him so beloved by the fandom makes him better. like yeah i love all parent characters that are just big softies but big softie parents that also are kinda (very much ) fucked up are even better. to ME. and i dont usually judge how good characters are on the basis of how good of a parent they are which is oddly something that a Lot of people do but. U wont find any of that on this blog which is also why i loveeeee ursa.

BUT I DIGRESS! here is my absolute favorite. its unfinished but what is there is still very loaded. digs in deep to iroh. gets pretty nitty gritty with it too. it changed how i see iroh and specifically season 1 iroh. it balances his b1 behavior with his later revealed status as a grand lotus MASTERFULLY, and puts his manipulative and cunning side on full display. might even make you mad at him a little bit

this one is less of a take on iroh as like. a general and a grand lotus and the war side of him and more of him as a father. its short and sad and i adore all of this authors fics involving iroh. it still shines a good light on the consequences of irohs own actions though because lu ten dying was literally his fault. the selfishness and the manic desperation that bleeds through this monologue is kind of scary but also is tragically beautiful.

ALSO these specific parts near the end of salvage were REALLY good. i feel like iroh is definitely the kind of guy that does a whole lot of backhanded comments as a way of patronizing without probably even realizing he does it?? i think a lot of people forget that what makes iroh being “changed” different from zuko is that zuko is still a child, and iroh is like. in his fifties or something. a whole LIFETIME of probably doing everything zuko did pre-redemption but far worse, and plenty times over. take how young azula is when ozai let her loose into the world into account. take the fact that iroh was already a general by the time he was sieging bss into account. im not gonna compare and contrast crimes here but i am trying to put weight onto how long iroh has been in the game. nasty shit like this is bound to still creep in the shadows of irohs mind and will definitely slip out sometimes.

and i know i keep bringing up that one unfinished super gnarly au fic that features azulon putting zuko into irohs care following irohs return to ba sing se (after ozai disgraced himself in requesting azulon give ozai the throne since iroh lost his only heir). hopefully one day ill find it because i hate to think the author deleted it or whatever . but out of all the fics that dig into irohs crimes id say this one does it the deepest while also SOMEHOW managing to make iroh sympathetic just by how sheerly pathetic and miserable he is the whole time. ONE DAY THOUGH. i pray that i will find it. because i have like over 200 pages of history on ao3 and i cant remember when exactly i read the fic so . searching for it has been kind of difficult but if i find it trust i will post it lol

[art-of-love-and-war]

hi! Can I request for an ikepri hc with babyyy? Where they bring their baby to work with them! like Sariel bring his baby to work with him like perhaps to a teaching or the princes meeting with him, and his baby was just babbling there (awe ><) . For Nokto where he bring his baby to his meeting with some higher up, and while he was working, he's also playing with the baby ( I imagine between he or licht will get a twin or triplets, depends on you which one of them). Licht/Leon bring their babies to combat practice. For Jin I can't think of anything yet, so if you got one, pleas do it hehe ( I really cant stop thinking that he will really get a twin born) . You can do a pt 2 for other princes too if you want :))

Characters: Leon Dompteur, Licht Klein, Nokto Klein and Sariel Noir and how they are as parents. Rating: General. Word count: 1,394 words  Author note: I’m sorry in advance for any ooc parts on Sariel’s, he is the shortest bit I bit since I haven’t read his route, I probably will re-write it on another hc’s for funsies as well as do the other princes. But so far I’m pretty satisfied. Also this is more of them as fathers more than just with baby kids.

[୨୧] — Leon Dompteur

He is a fun dad, and he adores being a father. 

There’s just something about having innocence in the palm of his hand, to be able to protect it, raise it, shape it. A memory of all things he could never have and a silent prayer to the sky above. 

He applies the “be the adult you never had as a child”

He won’t ever mind tending to the baby’s needs, sure, people keep saying that wetnurses and nannies are there for a reason since he is the King, but it brings him joy to be able to help his child. 

I don’t think Leon would bring the baby to combat practice, maybe during lunch breaks, but he tries to keep the little prince/princess away until they are older so they start to understand the art of war and combat. 

But all of his men have sworn complete loyalty over the little one, most are eager for when the child grows up and has their division in the army to join their ranks. 

He is super caring of both you and the baby, he always makes sure to thank you profusely for giving him a child (a first of many or so he plans *Wink wink*) 

He takes pride in every achievement of the baby, “Yes, that’s my child!” big cheerleader dad. 

Did the baby learn how to sit, crawl, and roll? He’d be over the moon. He tells everyone. 

His brothers are so done with the conversation. They can’t help but love their little niece/nephew though. 

He is a bit weak and wants to spoil the child rotten, but at the same time, he holds himself back. Wants to build character for his child but doesn’t neglect them.

He would never neglect them. 

Instead, he wants to instruct the child that while they are part of the royalty, there’s an immense gap between social classes, but everyone is equal and their lives are as valuable as any other. They are in a privileged position and it's their job to make everyone’s quality of life better with the power they hold.

 [୨୧] — Nokto Klein

While he looks like he doesn’t want to be a dad, he’d be the happiest man on earth to have a mini copy of him and you around. 

Warning, this baby/babies(?) are completely spoiled rotten, he won’t care. Your kid(s) deserve the entire world. 

You smack him in the back of the head from time to time because your baby takes longer to walk since Nokto is always carrying them around.

Just like Leon, he is also one to brag about anything and everything his child does, even as a baby. 

It also serves two very useful purposes: to get more information or to escape meetings he doesn’t want to attend (but ends up attending anyways). 

In the first place, he already likes bringing his child everywhere with him and bringing him to parties or social gatherings is a huge plus. 

Everyone fawns about him and the baby, about how a great father he is and how cute the baby is. 

“Oh, I know.” 

Having a baby in his arms gets him a chance to start gossiping with other nobles and get more information after a good talk about parenthood.

His face would get so dark if anyone ever dismissed the feelings of a child, he thinks it's so important that his child or children in the near future (hopefully, if you wish) would feel loved and have all of their needs met. 

As for the latter aspect, it seems that he has a telepathic bond with the baby. 

Does he have to walk into a meeting? Thankfully the nanny comes running to him because the baby won’t stop crying unless he holds them.

He excuses himself for a moment or tries to call the meeting off, but since he can’t squeeze himself out of his duties most of the time he ends up attending and brings the baby with him.

 [୨୧] — Licht Klein

He is absolutely scared and anxious about every action and decision he takes as a parent.

Don’t get it wrong, he adores you and your baby(s) and would be even more scared if you happened to have twins, knowing his story with his brother and he doesn’t want the story to repeat itself before his eyes.

He believes any child should be free of the burdens from their parents and he lives off by that since having children with you. 

Those dark thoughts? Those past shadows and intrusive nightmares that present themselves before his eyes? He shakes them all off with the light that shines so pure from holding his kid(s). 

Despite being a bit reluctant, knowing the tensions between him and his brother, the child seems to like Nokto a lot, and Licht relies on his brother from time to time, it's not what he would do often but he appreciates another figure the baby can start to trust. 

A thing that brings him so much joy is being able to spend time together. With you leaning against his side and the child nestled between you in bed while he hums a beautiful lullaby he knows will soothe you both, or when you read out loud to them, while the child rests flat against his chest. It's such a calming scene, even when picturing it in his mind.

I also picture Licht as the type to not bring the baby to combat practice until they are much much older; and even if having a skill in combat is important as part of royalty, he relies on his brothers, maybe Yves or even Leon to start the child on their way of learning how to properly use a sword.

When the child grows he won’t even spar with them, he fears his style of combat is too beastly and ruthless, he doesn’t want to harm them by accident or to be violent toward them, even in practice.

He is such a loving father too, he wants to be present in every aspect of their life with you and he gladly takes on any tasks that require him. 

Are you too busy one day or just want to spend a day by yourself? No troubles, he and the baby will go with Uncle Yves and have tea and sweets. Well, the baby will have milk and maybe Licht will have the entire tray of sweets since the baby is still too young to eat those. 

 [୨୧] — Sariel Noir

This man is a master at multitasking, so handling the baby any day won’t be of any trouble, after all, he almost raised the youngest of the princes so it's a piece of cake for him. 

But he’d rather that you handle the baby at most times since his line of work can encounter some awful people that might stay on his bad book. 

If he knows it will be a calm day with him staying at the office doing paperwork he’d certainly want the child to be with him. 

He can be a busy man and wants to at least keep an eye on his child. 

I can also picture him having a play-pen in his office, he can keep an eye out on the baby; if he happens to have moments where he needs to take a break, he’ll sit with the baby, watch them sleep, and play with them if they are awake.

His favorite times though, are at night, especially if hours passed without both of you seeing each other, he wants the domestic part of having a family of being a husband and a father. 

Oh, but the clouds of not-so-nice thoughts are always clouding the back of his mind, telling him how he should not get attached as all of what you had built together could disappear at any moment by the desire of anyone that considers him a danger. 

But seeing his face, you know how to scare those awful thoughts away, smiling, handing the baby to him, and watching his lips curl into a gentle smile. 

As the child grows I can picture him being a stern dad, he makes sure his child knows that they are loved and he shows it with actions and quality time you spend together as a family.

[blue-jisungs]

about you

a/n. if you follow me for a while you might have noticed i enjoy reading. to be honest i do adore japanese literature – whether it’s psychological, romance or “just a novel”. i feel like their way of writing is so… fresh? so tender? i can’t put it in words but the style is just so relaxing to read (maybe it’s because of the grammar? whilst translating it might lose its originality as well but i do believe it’s partly because of that). but speaking of chineese literature i just bought one book (yup that also inspired me to write this) so i'm wondering if it will feel different than japanese or korean (i hope you get what i mean?? like i cant explain it properly lmao)

(sorry for rambling i could go for hours when it comes to books ㅠㅠ )

“hi baby!” jun’s voice welcomed you the second you opened the door.

“hi junnie!” you greeted him back, taking off your shoes quickly.

“are you hungry?” he asks and just now you notice the rummage of cutlery and amazing smell of chinese food. your mouth watered and before you could answer, your stomach did. jun’s laugh erupted from the kitchen and you rushed to him.

“yes, a bit! how was your day?” you ask and hug him from behind, hands wrapping around his waist. you place a quick kiss on his cheek and he melts into your touch.

“pretty boring without you” jun sighed dramatically “but as you see i prepared some food, cleaned up our place and read a book. and went on a walk”

“oh!” there’s a gasp that escapes your lips and to jun’s disappointment, your hands leave his waist because you go back to the hall “speaking about books…”

your boyfriend puts the food on the plates and then places them on the table. he watches you with the corner of his eye, as you rummage through your bag, and fixes the flowers he bought today.

you hum happily, walking up to the table. jun already sat down so you slide the book next to him. he doesn’t even read the title – his soft, loving gaze is focused on you. and you are too busy babbling to notice that.

“i bought this one kind of spontaneously. the title caught my attention and then the description said it’s poetry. but then i noticed it’s by a chinese author! then i did some research and found out there's another version of the book... like, there's english translation and next to it there's the original written in chinese! and... i thought about you, of course” you explain and jun’s smile grows wider with every word you say.

you sit down and tilt your head, finally meeting his gaze.

“did you hear about this book? the description also said it had a huge influence in poetry so i was curious if that’s true or if they just wrote it to make people buy it” you ask and notice a small bouquet of your favourite flowers in a vase. you grin at the sight and before you can say something about them, jun grabs the book in his one hand and reads the back.

“i did hear about it. i didn’t read it, unfortunately” he hums and reads the description. your book taste never fails to amaze him – one day you’re reading teeth rotting fluff, the other bloody murder mysteries… and the other chinese poetry.

“you did? oh wow so they didn’t lie!” you coo, intrigued. you don’t know why this surprised you – maybe because the nowadays big books that everyone hears about are just… the titles you hear for the first time.

“but i see you bought the chinese-english one?” jun asks and looks at the cover. you blush and scratch your head.

"well i was intrigued and i thought that maybe this way we could read this together? yeah, but i had to go to the bookstore that was literally across the town..." you mumbled

jun hands the book to you and you nod, putting it back in a safe place. his eyes linger on you, mind trying to gather words. your thought process whilst buying this book amazed him, heart beating a little too fast. and the effort you put in just to get the bilingual version...? his mind and heart were racing fueled by the love he has for you.

“you bought flowers” you murmur, blood rushing to your cheeks and that's what brings him back to reality.

“mhm. i saw them on a walk and they reminded me of you” jun grabs your hand and sends you the sweetest smile possible. "and yes, i'd love to read it with you"

[ masterlist <3 ]

taglist. @geniejunn ,, @luvhyun3 ,, @starlostseungmin ,, @elviransworld ,, @jnks6r ,, @sieunsgf ,, @ethereallino ,, @laylasbunbunny ,, @duolingofanaccount ,, @slytherinhobi ,, @jung0ne ,, @ka-ni-ma ,, @julaute ,, @moonacholy ,, @ameliesaysshoo ,, @dazzlingligth

[recent-rose]

i see a lot of ppl like losing their minds abt how bad ch82 is and im not saying cirrus had any right to start feeling skylar up without asking (obv not? do we rly have to disclaim this before giving a more nuanced take about what happened? idk) but like

cirrus hears the word “stop” one time out of skylar’s mouth and, in a key point, stops what he’s doing and starts crying. there’s a whole panel dedicated to his (pretty heartbreaking) reaction to that one word. he also took skylar being hard as a green light, totally shouldn’t have, but again this is one Fucked Up Individual we have here i can totally see why his csa would lead him to mistake physiological reaction for consent. he’s pretty clearly reliving what was done to him also there are like 2 panels that very clearly parallel panels from when he was younger and acting out before and after being assaulted by his teacher.

and then there’s skylar’s reaction to all this, which is very telling. last time he was in this situation with cirrus he didn’t know cirrus liked him for real so it triggered his ptsd in a much more visceral way. he was literally green, he couldn’t stomach so much as being near cirrus. he thought cirrus was minwoo 2.0, trying to make fun of and use his sexuality. in reality cirrus was making fun of his stalking of chanil and his being gay had nothing to do with it, but thats besides the point. on the other hand in ch82, he knows cirrus actually wants him. he knows, and has known for quite a while, that cirrus likes him. rly cant overstate what a big deal it is for skylar to know he’s on the receiving end of genuine mlm attraction here and you can TELL what a difference it makes in how he reacts to cirrus. like when cirrus says “because its you” while they’re still just talking he starts blushing and doesn’t stop from that point on. this story is very ‘show dont tell’ and you have to read around the characters obfuscating their true feelings. idk if skylar “likes” cirrus at this point, or if he’s still mentally blocking any attainable romantic partner because of his trauma, but his perception of cirrus has obviously changed quite a lot since the early days.

annnnyway. still rly happy with the direction and themes of this story. unless something in ch83 happens and makes me eat my words but i doubt it. so far i’m quite impressed with the authors handling of extreme trauma and how devastating its consequences can be.

[samsimisauser]

I am incredibly exited to announce that this year i will be taking part the @mlbigbang

For this Event i have been partnered with the absolutely amazing @asti-doodles (you will get a sneak peek of the art down below the story fragment)

The first chapter will drop on January 5th (that means you'll get to read mine and @mysticraven20s Story on the same day!)

Now to the story: The summary :

Crown-Prince Adrien has just escaped from the more than Six years of confinement he was forced into after his mothers death. And He's really not too keen on his father sitting on his throne, ruling over his people (and doing quite the bad Job). So instead of having a calm few weeks with his aunt, as was the original plan he escapes to the nearest Town and makes contract with the revolutionary cell there. Soon he is brought before their leader, a fierce woman known only as "the Lady". Needless to say he's smitten. Luckily everyone here wants the same thing! Right? Except she keeps going on about this thing called democracy…

Well that`s one way to look at the situation i wonder what the Lady(bug) thinks...?

President ex nihilo Ladybug really only wants one thing, for her people to be free and not starving. Her People of course being everyone without a title. Unfortunately for everyone the government strongly disagrees with her "freedom and not starving" plan and brands her a traitor. Luckily she managed to gather a few like-minded people. And a few not so like-minded People, but at least they all agree on one thing. The king must go. Then the prince shows up on her door. Somewhat surprisingly he also wants to get rid of the king. There`s just one slight problem, she cant get him out of her head.

Now for a sneak peek of chapter one of Sic Semper Regis:

"So you are the -" Adrien tries to project as much authority and confidence as he can. He does not even manage to finish a sentence. 

The rapier (presumably what was used to cut his blindfold earlier) is shoved in his face. A moment later she changes her mind, re-sheathing her rapier, and instead points a gun at him. He is far too close, not to mention the Lady's arm is absolutely steady. Adrien sinks down in the chair, it is less of an attempt to avoid what's about to happen and More of an expression of exhaustion and disappointment in himself. One thing is for certain: 

He is going to die. Coming here was a mistake. 

The Revolutionaries are not his allies, they are a bunch of mindless thugs. Instead of stupidly coming here on his own, he should have just convinced his aunt to move against his father when he had the chance. He made a miscalculation and now he's going to pay the price. 

He gathers his last shreds of bravery. He raises his head and looks - for the first and quite possibly the last time at his captor. 

She (because it must be her) is dressed in simple clothing, certainly not what he would expect from someone calling themselves "the Lady". A simple pair of dark blue pants, a white shirt underneath a dark west. On top of her dark, somehow almost blueish hair, sits a simple cap, it is black. The only thing differentiating her cap from an ordinary one is the single red feather on its left side. The revolutionaries end all of their pamphlets with the same sketch of a feather.

 Desperately he tries to bring his mind back on track, what track? What reason?  he is going to die here, his thoughts are spiraling so needs to change… something. He tries to make out her  facial features but fails to do so, not because of the light in his cell (his soon to be grave) but because his eyes simply slide off of her. 

She's beautiful, his heart sings, stupidly. Well at least I'm going to die with a beautiful woman at my side, he thinks more than a little hysterically. A broken little noise makes its way past his lips. He manages to look into her eyes. They are Blue, so very very blue.

[ofbreathandflame]

Do you believe racist authors deserve redemption? I love your blog and I’m interested in your opinion on this matter since you speak about racism in books.

hi anon!!! this is a great question, thanks for asking it!!!

i don't believe people deserve redemption. or that they have to 'qualify' to get better. if people want to change - its their right to change, to grow and become a better person. this is the kind of attitude i hold for authors as well.

but i think the harder part of the process comes after that. that there are consequences. some people will never forgive your racism, some people will never forgive that hurt even if you do get better, and that's....okay. its like - true change is always receptive towards criticism. it will always acknowledge the past to inform the future - and often authors (or white people in general) who want to change - just do. and they are usually understanding and introspective of the way they move in the world. bc once you see it, its very hard not to see where racism usually finds its footing. racism is learned - people are not inherently evil. but its also very baked into our foundation, so we are taught white supremacist ideologies from the moment we come out into the world.

i think the focus is oftentimes primarily put on avoiding or lessening the consequences. that an ‘I’m sorry’ will fix the wound.

racism is cruel. it has far reaching consequences - it isn't a buzzword. its fruitful to think about how racism affects its victims. how little children read literature and media and come away with the unconscious ideology that they are lesser. think abt the first racist moment in a book you read - something beloved. think about the trauma you carried when you realized the person you loved and adored and supported didn't even see you as a human being. every person of color, every black person has had that moment where they realized that a book they loved was not written for them; that they were meant to be the support, the helper, the friend, the maid, the 'perfect' girlfriend who just isn't good enough, the motivation, the body that served the vehicle for character development but never the main character. never a human being. never a fantasy.

and when you think about that - it becomes easier to see why people aren't willing to forgive how that racist author made them feel. bc we always have to carry that. we have to be the ones to unlearn hatred of ourselves. we have to carry the weight of the stereotypes, the ripples across media, the boxes we get put into.

personally - its a hard offense for me to forgive. its very hard for me to do so, because honestly my mind is always thinking about how there is there's often little motivation for some white authors to introspect bc the world is catered to them. its very hard to reflect when there's a foundation beneath you telling you there's nothing to reflect upon. so its extra work to actually make conscious change bc the world will always be content with the symbolic. people will always applaud the bare minimum. so its hard to gouge real change from just public shame. or kudos points.

in short - authors who want to change will change. authors who are empathetic and seek true change will always be vocal about it. and in those cases - i forgive. taking accountability, changing for the better and apologizing is all we can really ask. if an author doesn't do that than i have little interest in forgiving it. if an author cant say - 'oh i didn't mean that, and i recognize why that was harmful, i will do better.' then i cant take them seriously. its the bare minimum. staying silent and riding out the criticism without acknowledging what was harmful and how it was harmful means you seek none of the true change and it means im not interesting in supporting or forgiving, but alas that's just me!

[cowardlybean]

Hi this is MalkyTop from ao3 I know I just wrote a long-ass comment on recollections and I sorta feel weird adding more to it there so I’m sending an ask instead, because! I am shaking the bars of my cell anyways since now im convinced that the stuff with reigen is heavily connected to Mogami I wonder if mogami’s “return” (chapter 2) is related to a certain evil spirit showing up at the office? After all they have previous history and dimple had just shown up. Anyways I am gnawing on this I love puzzling things out I want to get a good grade in recollections.

HELLO FIRST OFF I JUST WANNA SAY TYSM FOR BEING INTERESTED IN MY STORY!!!!! IT MAKES ME SO MUCH MORE EXCITED TO KEEP WORKING ON IT!!!!!!!!!

Mogami definitely plays a role in this story (if it wasn’t already obvious) though most of that role is gonna be shown in the next section! Not just through Reigen’s journaling either :3 I will say though! The author of the secret link is a canon character from Mob Psycho, so keep that in mind >:3c

APART FROM THAT I cant say much for the sake of not spoiling but about the plant spirit from S2 EP1 this is so embarrassing to admit but I did. Kinda rush that entry </3 To Reigen it was hardly any special exorcism apart from Mob learning something new, but to my readers the broccoli seeds are what is important! IM HEAVILY RESTRAINING FROM GIVING A HINT HERE ACK

but anyway thank you so much for theorizing and having fun with my fic!!! It makes it so much more fun to write :D

Read Recollection Here!

[terraliensvent]

I would like to read your thoughts about pluralkit. For me I’ve noticed that there are some individuals that will say wild things and use plural kit to send the messages. I blocked one person in the server so far cause I just found them to be a bit much.

i got another ask wanting to know my thoughts on pluralkit, so ill indulge

buckle up bitches cause this is gonna be a LONG one

for starters, i hate pluralkit because you cant block the bot accounts it uses so if i want to block an annoying sys, i cant! definitely can see it as a way to circumvent blocks

second, it just further adds to the people who will use it to roleplay that they have alters

(i actually have a lot to say here and did research so please look at the read more if youre interested)

im gonna be honest, i do not think the people who use pluralkit have DID, and i absolutely dont believe a large majority of the people on toyhouse and in cs spaces who say they have DID. some of you might hate me for that opinion and thats fine, but truthfully, i think that way too many people use it as a way to roleplay.

im gonna try my best to be gentle with how i present my thoughts, but i know that there are some people (primarily young people who believe they have alters and refuse to change their minds— a well known symptom of being young) who will flame me for just daring to not believe them, and my thoughts on this go beyond just terraliens and cs spaces in general, terraliens is just a REALLY good example of this kind of community.

i think that society has tried to medicalize behaviors to a startling degree. when people said “normalize neurodivergence” we flew a bit past the mark and now the self-diagnosis crowd will see a person with an unusually strong passion for a hobby and say “they must have autism”

in this type of world, kids wont say “i love Blorbo from Show I Like, i wanna pretend to be them on the internet” and then disclose to people that, yes, its just a roleplay and im doing it for fun; instead its, “i feel a strong connection to Blorbo so i must have DID and theyre one of my alters. this isnt something im doing for fun, i have this medical condition and you cannot tell me otherwise”

the issue with DID kids is that they see that yes, things like fictives and animal alters are possible, but VERY unlikely within a disorder that is already highly unlikely, and they say, well i must fit inside of that 0.000001%, and then other people say the same thing and now we have multiple people saying they have DID within a server of only 3000 people. they will say “you dont know anything about DID,” but then will say they have 3 fictive alters from a piece of media that came out less than 5 years ago. they’ll say “well, diagnostic criteria includes self-assessment therefore that should be enough to decide that i have DID

in the time it’s taken me to write up this response, i actually went looking for research. Specifically i wanted to find something that predated 2020 because that was the time the “fake disorder” phenomenon really hit its peak and i didnt want potential false cases and misinformation that the current day DID crowd spreads to skew the data.

What i found was this medical journal published in May 2017 (so 3 years pre-2020, and less than 7 years old as of today. this document is less than 10 years old so dont even try to tell me its outdated), the authors of the journal are accredited to the psychology and psychiatry departments of the university school of medicine in Turkey, University of Canterbury in New Zealand, and University of Pretoria in South Africa. SO, suffice to say im gonna trust these people’s research more than a 15 year old on discord.

im gonna summarize a few points because, as a medical journal it is totally overblown with professional jargon and i consider myself to have good ability to convert flowery language to plain speak

The first segment i wanna highlight is in the introduction of the document, “

Yet, when all these systems come together to underpin and maintain a person’s identity, and dissociation occurs at this (identity/personality) level, it creates dissociative identities. Here, separate organized systems of functioning, with their own unique perspective on the world and who they are, appear to co-exist within the individual. Each of these identities has their own first-person perspective or experience of self-consciousness. Consequently, each of these identities reports their own subjective experiences and memories, their own sense of agency and will, and their own perspective on who they are. They often report being unaware of other identities or report amnesia for experiences that presumably occurred when other identities were engaging in executive actions.

The document states that the different “alters” present more as separate identities, where its different iterations of the same person who will have their own perspective of the world (each has their own “I” self). each iteration has its own memories and, the most important part, each iteration appears to be unaware of or have amnesia surrounding the other iterations. this one paragraph dismantles several of the talking points that DID kids use, it goes against the idea that people can co-front, it goes against the idea of having detailed in depth personas for each of your alters as so many of these people do. and we arent even past the INTRODUCTION

funnily enough, despite my effort to look for a document pre 2020 to mitigate false cases, this document actually mentions the DID faker crowd: “

The so-called sociocognitive model of DID (e.g., Lynn et al) went beyond recognizing the influence of sociocognitive factors on the development and phenomenology of DID. This model suggested that media reports, a high level of social knowledge about DID, influential and suggestive therapists, as well as patients’ own suggestibility, cognitive distortions and fantasy proneness all led patients to believe (wrongly) that they had dissociative identities. This view of DID markedly contrasts with the post-traumatic model of DID (outlined earlier), which proposes that dissociative identities are the primary results of early trauma and the relational, cognitive, emotional, and neurobiological consequences of it (along with other related factors as outlined in this paper) rather than primarily the result of social and cognitive forces. Moreover, the presence of sociocognitive forces does not provide any proof for iatrogenesis. Yet, sociocognitive and trauma models are not entirely contradictory, as the trauma model, e.g., argues that social and cultural factors influence the presentation, but not typically the creation, of dissociative identities. In fact, societal conditions themselves may also be the source of traumatic antecedents as observed in oppressive communities and traditions.

this post is getting crazy long, so im just gonna start wrapping it up here

i think that what ive stated here links with my previous ask about physical disabilities, disabilities and mental disorders arent really things to have a party over. they shouldnt be demonized of course, but we shouldnt be pretending like its some phenomenal thing to have a disorder thats based on severe complex trauma faced as a child. the part pluralkit plays in all of this is that it just further feeds the crowd and deludes these people into thinking their DID is real

im not going to believe any 15 year old furry when they publicly announce they have DID to a discord server of over 3,000, and that is a consequence of the sheer volume of people that fake having the disorder and continue to fake it with their stupid roleplay bots

obviously, i dont go out of my way to debate or mess with them, because at the end of the day its kids being stupid and cringe, but god the ramifications of these kids playing pretend with disorders is gonna be horrible. its already having really bad effects on autistic adults trying to operate in society as normal people and not be infantilized

i just hope this trend passes quickly and soon, and PLEASE let me block those stupid bot accounts i dont want to interact with any “system” that uses pluralkit

[simcardiac-arrested]

seeing you talk about russian literature is always so interesting to me because there’s not too much of it in polish schools. and i’m here like Damn what did i miss. maybe i shouldn’t have complained about mickiewicz

i did enjoy the few things they made us read, like crime and punishment or master and margarita.but hang in there for real o7

it’s like. the thing is it’s not even The Worst. it’s not downright unreadable and like i’m sure all of it is Classic(tm) for a reason and hell i even enjoyed reading some of it, like fathers and sons by turgenev. it’s just that when you’re forced to study the same 6 russian authors and over and over again it starts driving you MAD. like it is actually MADDENING. and after 11 years of studying a few 19th century russian novels you start to Get It: this shit is all the same. it’s literally allllll the fucking same u dont even gotta read it. Like i didn’t read crime and punishment OR war and peace (which is like THEEE russian novel) because i was too hyperfixated on my ocs to even Care About Checking Their Summaries. i didnt know anything. but u know what ? i just pulled things out of my ass and reached logical conclusions and literally just bullshitted my way through (They just let anyone graduate frfr) BECAUSE U KNOW WHAT? AFTER 11 YEARS ? U start to realize it’s alllllll the same fucking shit. it’s all the same shit no matter which russian novel u read. it’s always about how love good. OR NO ! love BAD. love HURTS and it KILLS. CHECK THIS OUT! CONVOLUTED LOVE TRIANGLE WHERE THE TWO MEN HAVE A STRANGELY CLOSE HOMOEROTIC RELATIONSHIP! no one is happy. Everyone is really depressed and wants to die. LOVE INTEREST ALERT! SHE IS EITHER GENUINELY 13 OR 18-20 BUT IS STILL DESCRIBED IN SUCH AN INFANTILIZING AND WEIRD WAY AND ACTS LIKE A GENUINE 13 YEAR OLD SO YOU WILL STILL FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE !! Love good tho. oh no sorry nvermind love makes everyone go insane and kill themselves. This character is on a perpetual downward spiral ! new generation GOOD. they have good ideas and they r smart and revolution good . Nvm i changed my mind new generation BAD because they care about NOTHING they invented NIHILISM and now don’t listen to adults. BAZINGA !!! ANOTHER CONVOLUTED ROMANCE WITH WEIRD UNDERTONES !!!!!!!! war bad. Did u know that ? war is bad. and scary. Unless we’re writing about how russia won LOL then war GOOD and SO EPIC !!!! AND THESE RUSSIAN DUDES WRECKED EVERYONE !!! but war bad ok ? promise u will remember war bad. Umm what else. oh! we’re killing ourselves again. ok. did u know the government is corrupt? did u? what if we wrote like 4037394 stories about just that . hold on what the FUCK this love interest is a ….. i cant even say it ……. p p p prostitute …..!!!!! MY GOD !!!!!!! THIS CANT BE HAPPENING !!!! SHE IS SO SICK AND IMPURE WE MUST KILL HER IMMEDIATELY. this character is steadily developing psychosis of some kind. Remember that new generation good unless they’re wrong then they’re bad. what’s the point of life ???? what’s the meaning ?????? let’s find out in this 500k word novel where the character falls in love wiyh a 13 year old and goes to war and then kills himself or something