#because when they’re walking in the woods he brings up that line and Luke asks if he’s thinking about his mom

[counting-stars-gayly]

So Luke was what Percy failed to save in the end, right? He was what mattered most? I’m gonna kill myself

[barbarianprncess]

did you mean it?

read on ao3.

It’s a total of 3 significant events that led to this, her forehead knocked against his, breaths heavy and mingled, eyes wide and hearts bleeding.

It’s a total of 3 significant events that led to this, her forehead knocked against his, breaths heavy and mingled, eyes wide and hearts bleeding.

The first event isn’t really an event at all. It’s a prologue, necessary context to truly understand the monumentalism of this moment. It’s the memory of her eyes, piercing and reproachful, being the first thing that he saw after losing his mother. It’s shared trauma and oreos while they’re young and naive. It’s truces and training and growing up too soon together. It’s stargazing and stupid jokes saving eachother in every possible way. It's the culmination of the years Percy spent growing, learning, and being with Annabeth, and the unknown and therefore repressed feelings that came with it. Feelings are like the sea in that way, they don’t take well to being restrained. Percy has found that you cannot box in oceans or sentiments, they always find a way to spill over and out, with no regard for the destruction left in its wake.

The second event is Dionysus deciding on a whim that the inhabitants of his camp are ‘uncultured pests’ and taking it upon himself to set up a field trip for campers to the Ancient Greek Cultural Center in New York. (Percy thinks it’s really just to distract kids that were still shaken up about the battle at camp and the losses it caused. But, Dionysus would never say so. He’s far too proud to admit to caring for the children he’s been assigned to look after.) Argus loaded all the kids he could fit into the strawberry vans, as Chiron listed all the reasons this was a terrible idea. As it turns out, his worries were in vain as miraculously, no monsters attacked, and no mortal asked too many questions. No, instead, the only hitch in his plan was the glaring inaccuracies of the Center sending Dionysus into a fit of rage. He ranted for so long, their 2 hour long field trip ended up lasting until the place closed.

Event the third is the ridiculously long line leading to the mens room at the rundown gas station they’ve stopped at, causing Percy to traipse into the woods, deep enough to know that no one other than the squirrels were watching, and pee there. Unbeknownst to him, Annabeth had decided to take a quick walk in the forest as well, (in the opposite direction of his peeing endeavor) with the purpose of clearing her head. Both returned to the parking lot after 10 minutes, with no truck in sight. The gas station lights are turned off on the inside and the door sign has switched decidedly to closed. They look at each other in disbelief.

“Percy?”

“Yeah?”

“Uh...did they…”    

“They didn’t. They wouldn’t.”

“I think they would.”

“They would never-”

“I have pretty solid evidence to the contrary.” Annabeth deadpans, casually letting her hair loose and hopping on top of the miniature gas machine for motorcycles.

“But, how did-”

“No Argus.” Which means, no all-seeing eyes to double check the headcount. Percy begins to pace.

“Okay, but-”

“Two trucks.” Both of which are probably assuming Percy and Annabeth are on the other.

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“Oh, gods.”

“Leave them out of this.”

“Those fuckers.”

“Which ones?” She asks. He looks up and she’s fighting a smile. He pointedly doesn’t notice the way her mouth curls up, or the way her hair falls around her shoulders and down her back, or how pretty she looks lit up by the neon red lights of the gas stations prices, which apparently doesn’t turn off when they close.

“Do you know something I don’t?”

“I know lots of things you don’t.”

“Ha-ha. I mean about how to get out of here.”

“Ohhhhh, let me think.” She wrinkles her nose in faux concentration, tilting her chin up towards  the sky. Percy is too annoyed to think it’s adorable. “Nope, not a clue.”

“Your phone?”

“Left it on the truck.”

“Iris message?”

“Percy, it’s dark as shit.” The laughter she’s been holding in comes pouring out. Nevermind that he feels his chest sigh in relief at hearing it for the first time since their quest, this is serious.

“You’re laughing.”

“Just a little.”

“You’re telling me, you don’t have a brilliant plan to get us on a truck.”

“Yes.”

“So, we’re stuck here.”

“Yes.”

“And you’re laughing?”

“You’re just really funny when you’re stressed.” She giggles. He can’t remember the last time she giggled. He missed it. He hates her.

“Oh my gods.”

“Okay, okay, look, I’m sorry. We’re halfway to camp right?” He nods. “I’m sure they’ll figure out we’re missing before they get all the way back to camp, but let's say, worst case scenario, they don’t-”

“Not helping-”

“And they make it the rest of the way back to camp. It took us four hours to get to the center, which means camp is two hours away, so if they make it the two hours back to camp before they realize we’re missing, and they drive back up-”

“C’mon ‘Beth, you know I suck at math.”

“We’re stuck here for five hours at most.”

“Five hours?”

“And that's if no passing cars let us use their phones to hurry the process up.”

“Five hours.”

She’s laughing again. “Seriously, what is so funny?”

“It’s just-” Her cheeks are red and she’s very poorly attempting to suppress her smile. “You’ve been calm in so many life or death situations, and being stuck at a gas station is what finally breaks through.”

“It’s nighttime.” She stares at him for a moment and then she’s laughing again, full bodied real laughter, and he's laughing too.

And it’s as if this gas station became their own personal Ogygia, an oasis, a resting place for them to be stupid kids again. And they don’t talk about the battle, or Rachel, or the volcano, or any of the million things set on tearing them apart. They talked about his mom getting serious about his new boyfriend, about Tyson’s underwater adventures and Grover’s searching shenanigans.

They smack talk with no real heat about who the better fighter is (Oh please, Seaweed Brain, I've been training since before you could tie your own shoes.), and argue about which ancient hero had the greatest journey (Hercules, are you kidding? Did you even read the myth?). They break into the gas station for snacks (What the fuck, Annabeth, where’d you learn to pick a lock? No, I wouldn’t prefer you break the glass, you psycho. Oh my gods, can you really break the glass?), and dissolve into giggles as they try to fit five drachma into the cash register.

They end up back outside sitting on the gas machines facing one another from three feet away.

“Your mom called me the other day.”

Percy, who’d been lazily squinting up at the murky sky, searching for any sign of stars, whipped his head to look at her. “What?”

“She called me on the phone. We talked for a bit. She said she wanted to make sure I was alright.”

“That sounds like something she would do.” He sighs and hops down from the machine, turning away from her, hoping to hide his blush from the dim light. “She cornered me on one of my off weekends, asked what was going on with us.”

“Oh.” He hears the shifting of fabric and assumes she followed him in sliding off the gas machine.

“Yeah.” It’s silent for a long time before she responds.

“What did you say?” She asks, her voice smaller than it was moments ago. He hears her scratching at the flat metal top of the machine. “When she asked, what did you say?”

He runs his finger through his hair, and one gets caught in a particularly large snarl. “Doesn’t matter.”

“It matters to me.” She whispers and gods he’s terrified but he really doesn’t have a choice when her voice wavers like that. Her words shake and every ounce of his being tells him to do whatever it takes to soothe it.

“I said we were fighting. That there wasn’t one sole reason for it, just a bunch of little reasons. I told her that I scared you when I….went away for two weeks last summer. And that you didn’t like bringing Rachel on your quest. I told her that we….. disagree about how to best handle Luke. That I probably wanted to protect you more than I wanted to listen to you.” She laughs softly and he blames what he says next on her laugh. It is the catalyst for everything that follows.

“I told her that we’d be okay. Because no matter what happens I’m always gonna love you.”

He hears her breath catch. He doesn’t have to look back to know she’s turned to face him fully. “Did you mean it?” She calls. He doesn’t answer. The words haven’t caught in his throat, they’ve spontaneously combusted in his vocal chords and he doesn’t think he’ll ever speak again.

The sound of gravel crunching gets closer until suddenly she's beside him, and he didn’t tell his torso to twist toward her, he thinks she might just be his center of gravity.

“Did you mean it?”

She’s looking up at him, and her hair smells like lemons, and her cheeks are pink, and her eyelashes go on for miles, and her sunspots are better than stars. And it’s as if she pulls the words right out of him, he’s hypnotized by everything about her.

“Of course I meant it.”

She exhales and closes her eyes and while he mourns the loss of the sight, his body moves on it’s own accord again and he’s edging closer and closer and she opens her eyes and here they are.

Their noses brush, and this time he closes his eyes, and their noses brush just so, and…

Whoa.

He was wrong, it wasn't just those three significant events that to her forehead knocked against his, breaths heavy and mingled, eyes wide and hearts positively bleeding. It’s clear he’s been waiting his entire life for this moment at this shitty gas station.

Waiting for this. Waiting for her.  

They kiss for a moment or an eternity, and they fit. His hands are on her hips and hers clutch at his shirt before sliding up to his throat, and it’s like his soul is whispering, oh there you are.

And then she’s pulling back, so she has just enough space to shake her head without disconnecting from his forehead.

She's breathless when she whispers, “This is a bad idea.”

His hands trail up and down her forearm of their own accord, and when he whispers back he’s breathless too. “Yeah, really bad idea.”

Her hands slide up from his chest to his shoulders, and then she’s kissing him again, with purpose, and he’s kissing back like his life depends on it because he thinks it might, thinks if he lets go of her he’d die on the spot.

It seems his theory might get tested when she pulls back again just far enough to whisper against his lips, “Is it always like that?”

He kisses her again, once, twice, because he can’t help it and whispers back, “I don’t know, you were my first kiss.”

He’d released any serious hold he had on her the moment she hesitated, but then she’s rocking back up to meet him halfway and his entire body thinks thank the gods. He actually sighs his relief into her mouth, as his hands desperately reach for her face, some fingers tangling in her hair, and their lips are magnets, opposites that don’t have a choice but to pull together. Despite how much he wants to keep doing this forever, he has to tell her.

“I don’t wanna lose you, again.” He means not ever, but he figures she understands the severity in his voice. She’s running her hand through his hair, and his slide up and down her back, and she knocks her nose against his as she answers, “I know, me either. I’m confused, this is confusing me.” And she tilts her chin just so, like she did a million years ago, and this time he kisses her.

They kiss for an infinity, he gets to taste her laughter when she giggles at the absurdness of it all, and it’s better than ambrosia. He kisses her until he doesn’t know anything else, until his entire universe is Annabeth Chase, with her cheeks and her curls and her lips. She is everything.

And then headlights penetrate their universe, voices bring an end to their infinity, and Chiron is speaking but it’s nothing, it’s all white noise because she’s no longer in his arms, and his center of gravity is being ripped away and he hears someone ask, “What’d you guys do?”

He’s still looking at her face when she answers, “You know, tried not to strangle each other mostly.”

But, she looks back before she turns all the way around and her gaze is charged and her lips quirk with the secret they share.

He is so screwed.

[kookie-doughs]

Y/N L/N AND THE HALFBLOODS

Percy Jackson X Reader -Y/N L/N met Percy Jackson and everything was now ruined.

CHAPTER 9: Percy Forces Me To Join A Quest

The next morning, Percy moved to cabin three. Luke was the only one I could hang out with from my cabin. He was also the one who took care of my wounds after the thing happened. Nobody mentioned the hellhound, but I got the feeling they were all talking about it behind my back. The attack had scared everybody. It sent two messages: one, that I managed to command a hellhound; and two, I came with the son of Poseidon. They all assume I would be as great as Percy. The other campers steered clear of me as much as possible. Only Luke struck around. Yes, even Percy started ignoring me. I figured it had something to do with water and stuffs. Cabin eleven was too nervous to have sword class with him after what happened in the woods, so he had one-on-one with Luke. I usually sit in to watch them in hopes of Percy talking to me again. But nada. "You're going to need all the training you can get," Luke promised, as they were working with swords and flaming torches. "Now let's try that viper-beheading strike again. Fifty more repetitions." Annabeth still taught Percy and I Greek but on different times I had mine in the mornings. Even Clarisse kept her distance, though her venomous looks made it clear she wanted to kill me. I wished she would just yell or punch me or something. I'd rather get into fights every day than be ignored. I stayed with Luke most of my time. We'd gotten close that talking about gods wasn't such a touchy subject. He also told me stuffs about himself, like how he got his scar and small stuffs. I was still in bed in cabin eleven. My body told me it was morning, but it was dark outside, and thunder rolled across the hills. A storm was brewing. I hadn't dreamed that. It was so early that most of the campers were still asleep. "Good morning?" I saw Luke standing near the door. "Eh... good enough I guess." I said sitting on my bed. "It's really boring since I don't do anything." "Not sure if I'm bringing you good news or bad," He smiled taking the seat beside me. "But Mr. D wants to see you." "Really? Will I finally get to do something fun?" "I feel like I should be offended." He gasped dramatically. "Why? Am I not fun?" I laughed, "Pretty much yeah." "Ouch. Anyways, I'd better let him tell you what's up." "Walk with me?" I asked with an UwU face. "I would, but commitment and all that." He joked. "Aight then. I'll get ready, wait for me outside." "I said I won't!" "Geez don't need to be in a hurry. I won't take long." I got dressed and went out to see him with an exaggerated frown. "You better walk fast. I'll leave as soon as you get there." For days, I'd been half expecting a summons to the Big House. Now that Percy was declared a son of Poseidon, one of the Big Three gods who weren't supposed to have kids, I figured it was a crime for him just to be alive. They're probably suspicious of me now as well with Percy and I's relation. The other gods had probably been debating the best way to punish me for existing, and now Mr. D was ready to deliver their verdict. "So... with Percy being a big three material. What would that make me?" "Well, putting aside the fact that you suck, you drown at every body of water that's at least a foot deep, you don't smell like a half-blood. I'd say you're... one of the big three's. Maybe Zeus's." "Har har. I'm just really worried you know? With Percy getting claimed as Poseidon's... and I came with him. And water just loves me so much. I'd assume I'm somewhere along the lines of Zeus and... Zeus. Is there someone stronger than Zeus?" "Depends on who you asked." "If I asked Zeus he'd definitely answer Zeus." I heard a loud thunder echoed. "Someone's brave." Luke laughed. Over Long Island Sound, the sky looked like ink soup coming to a boil. A hazy curtain of rain was coming in our direction. I asked Luke if we needed an umbrella. "No," he said. "It never rains here unless we want it to." "So my kiss under the rain fantasy is a no?" "If it has to be here... probably." I pointed at the storm. "What the heck is that, then?" "Bad news. But don't worry, it'll pass by us." I realized he was right. In the week I'd been here, it had never even been overcast. The few rain clouds I'd seen had skirted right around the edges of the valley. But this storm... this one was huge. At the volleyball pit, the kids from Apollo's cabin were playing a morning game against the satyrs. Dionysus's twins were walking around in the strawberry fields, making the plants grow. Everybody was going about their normal business, but they looked tense. They kept their eyes on the storm. When Luke saw the front porch of the Big House. "Whatever they say. Don't choose the option where you'll die." "Half a promise. Depends on the other option." "Well I'll give you an easier promise. Don't die." "Not really easier but okay."

After he ruffled my hair, I walked up to the front porch of the Big House. Dionysus sat at the pinochle table in his tiger-striped Hawaiian shirt with his Diet Coke, just as he had on my first day. Chiron sat across the table in his fake wheelchair. They were playing against invisible opponents--two sets of cards hovering in the air. "Y/N!" Grover greeted. "Well, well," Mr. D said without looking up. "Our little celebrity finally got his request." I turned to see Percy who was looking at me and then moved away. I waited for him to greet... "Come closer, both of you," Mr. D said. "And don't expect me to kowtow to you, mortal, just because old Barnacle-Beard is your father." A net of lightning flashed across the clouds. Thunder shook the windows of the house. "Blah, blah, blah," Dionysus said. Chiron feigned interest in his pinochle cards. Grover cowered by the railing, his hooves clopping back and forth. "If I had my way," Dionysus said, "I would cause your molecules to erupt in flames. We'd sweep up the ashes and be done with a lot of trouble. But Chiron seems to feel this would be against my mission at this cursed camp: to keep you little brats safe from harm." "Spontaneous combustion is a form of harm, Mr. D," Chiron put in. "Nonsense," Dionysus said. "Boy wouldn't feel a thing. Nevertheless, I've agreed to restrain myself I'm thinking of turning you into a dolphin instead, sending you back to your father." "Mr. D—" Chiron warned. "Oh, all right," Dionysus relented. "There's one more option. But it's deadly foolishness." Dionysus rose, and the invisible players' cards dropped to the table. "I'm off to Olympus for the emergency meeting. If the boy is still here when I get back, I'll turn him into an Atlantic bottlenose. Do you understand? And Perseus Jackson, if you're at all smart, you'll see that's a much more sensible choice than what Chiron feels you must do." Dionysus picked up a playing card, twisted it, and it became a plastic rectangle. A credit card? No. A security pass. He snapped his fingers. The air seemed to fold and bend around him. He became a hologram, then a wind, then he was gone, leaving only the smell of fresh-pressed grapes lingering behind. Chiron smiled at me, but he looked tired and strained. "Sit, Percy, please. You too Y/N and Grover." We did. Grover sat between us. Chiron laid his cards on the table, a winning hand he hadn't gotten to use. "Tell me, Percy," he said. "What did you make of the hellhound?" "It scared me," I said. "If Y/N hadn't told it to stand down, I'd be dead." I saw Percy turn to my direction, which made me roll my eyes. "You'll meet worse, Percy. Far worse, before you're done." "Done... with what?" "Your quest, of course. Will you accept it?" I glanced at Grover, who was crossing his fingers. "Um, sir," I said, "you haven't told me what it is yet." Chiron grimaced. "Well, that's the hard part, the details." Thunder rumbled across the valley. The storm clouds had now reached the edge of the beach. As far as I could see, the sky and the sea were boiling together. "Poseidon and Zeus," Percy said. "They're fighting over something valuable... something that was stolen, aren't they?". Chiron and Grover exchanged looks. Chiron sat forward in his wheelchair. "How did you know that?" "The weather since Christmas has been weird, like the sea and the sky are fighting. Then I talked to Annabeth, and she'd overheard something about a theft. And... I've also been having these dreams." "I knew it," Grover said. "Hush, satyr," Chiron ordered. "But it is his quest!" Grover's eyes were bright with excitement. "It must be!" "Only the Oracle can determine." Chiron stroked his bristly beard. "Nevertheless, Percy, you are correct. Your father and Zeus are having their worst quarrel in centuries. They are fighting over something valuable that was stolen. To be precise: a lightning bolt." I laughed. "A what?" "Do not take this lightly," Chiron warned. "I'm not talking about some tinfoil-covered zigzag you'd see in a second-grade play. I'm talking about a two-foot-long cylinder of high-grade celestial bronze, capped on both ends with god-level explosives." "Oh." "Zeus's master bolt," Chiron said, getting worked up now. "The symbol of his power, from which all other lightning bolts are patterned. The first weapon made by the Cyclopes for the war against the Titans, the bolt that sheered the top off Mount Etna and hurled Kronos from his throne; the master bolt, which packs enough power to make mortal hydrogen bombs look like firecrackers." "And it's missing?" "Stolen," Chiron said. "By who?" "By whom," Chiron corrected. Once a teacher, always a teacher. "By you." "At least"—Chiron held up a hand—"that's what Zeus thinks. During the winter solstice, at the last council of the gods, Zeus and Poseidon had an argument. The usual nonsense: 'Mother Rhea always liked you best', 'Air disasters are more spectacular than sea disasters,' et cetera. Afterward, Zeus realized his master bolt was missing, taken from the throne room under his very nose. He immediately blamed Poseidon. Now, a god cannot usurp another god's symbol of power directly—that is forbidden by the most ancient of divine laws. But Zeus believes your father convinced a human hero to take it." "But I didn't—" "Patience and listen, child," Chiron said. "Zeus has good reason to be suspicious. The forges of the Cyclopes are under the ocean, which gives Poseidon some influence over the makers of his brother's lightning. Zeus believes Poseidon has taken the master bolt, and is now secretly having the Cyclopes build an arsenal of illegal copies, which might be used to topple Zeus from his throne. The only thing Zeus wasn't sure about was which hero Poseidon used to steal the bolt. Now Poseidon has openly claimed you as his son. You were in New York over the winter holidays. You could easily have snuck into Olympus. Zeus believes he has found his thief." "But I've never even been to Olympus! Zeus is crazy!" Chiron and Grover glanced nervously at the sky. The clouds didn't seem to be parting around us, as Luke had promised. They were rolling straight over our valley, sealing us in like a coffin lid. "Er, Percy...?" Grover said. "We don't use the c-word to describe the Lord of the Sky." "Perhaps paranoid," Chiron suggested. "Then again, Poseidon has tried to unseat Zeus before. I believe that was question thirty-eight on your final exam...." He looked at Percy. Chiron was waiting for an answer. "Something about a golden net?" He answered. "Poseidon and Hera and a few other gods... they, like, trapped Zeus and wouldn't let him out until he promised to be a better ruler, right?" "Correct," Chiron said. "And Zeus has never trusted Poseidon since. Of course, Poseidon denies stealing the master bolt. He took great offense at the accusation. The two have been arguing back and forth for months, threatening war. And now, you've come along—the proverbial last straw." "But I'm just a kid!" "Percy," Grover cut in, "if you were Zeus, and you already thought your brother was plotting to overthrow you, then your brother suddenly admitted he had broken the sacred oath he took after World War II, that he's fathered a new mortal hero who might be used as a weapon against you.... Wouldn't that put a twist in your toga?" "But I didn't do anything. Poseidon—my dad—he didn't really have this master bolt stolen, did he?" Chiron sighed. "Most thinking observers would agree that thievery is not Poseidon's style. But the Sea God is too proud to try convincing Zeus of that. Zeus has demanded that Poseidon return the bolt by the summer solstice. That's June twenty-first, ten days from now. Poseidon wants an apology for being called a thief by the same date. I hoped that diplomacy might prevail, that Hera or Demeter or Hestia would make the two brothers see sense. But your arrival has inflamed Zeus's temper. Now neither god will back down. Unless someone intervenes, unless the master bolt is found and returned to Zeus before the solstice, there will be war. And do you know what a full-fledged war would look like, Percy?" "Bad?" "Imagine the world in chaos. Nature at war with itself. Olympians forced to choose sides between Zeus and Poseidon. Destruction. Carnage. Millions dead. Western civilization turned into a battleground so big it will make the Trojan War look like a water-balloon fight." "Bad," I repeated. "And you, Percy Jackson, would be the first to feel Zeus's wrath." It started to rain. Volleyball players stopped their game and stared in stunned silence at the sky. I had brought this storm to Half-Blood Hill. Zeus was punishing the whole camp because of Percy. I was furious. "So he has to find the stupid bolt," I said. "And return it to Zeus." "What better peace offering," Chiron said, "than to have the son of Poseidon return Zeus's property?" "If Poseidon doesn't have it, where is the thing?" "I believe I know." Chiron's expression was grim. "Part of a prophecy I had years ago... well, some of the lines make sense to me, now. But before I can say more, you must officially take up the quest. You must seek the counsel of the Oracle." "Why can't you tell me where the bolt is beforehand?" "Because if I did, you would be too afraid to accept the challenge." "Good reason." "You agree then?" He looked at Grover, who nodded encouragingly. Easy for him. He wasn't the one Zeus wanted to kill. Percy then turned to me, "All right," he said. "But, I'll go when Y/N comes with." "Woah there! I am not going anywhere." I hissed. You ignore me for days and now you want me to die with you now? "Why do I have to go with you?" "Percy---" "I don't want to leave without her." He looked down. I felt guilty about turning him down. Which was stupid since he's the one at fault. I gave a sigh, I hope Luke won't get mad at me. "It's better than you being turned into a dolphin." I mumbled. "I'll go." "Then it's time you consulted the Oracle," Chiron said. "Go upstairs, Percy Jackson, to the attic. When you come back down, assuming you're still sane, we will talk more." Before Percy came up he took my arm and pulled me in a hug. "I wanted you there, so we could save our parents together. After this quest, you me your mom and dad and my mom, will stay together." I hugged him back and nodded. "Thank you." Four flights up, the stairs ended under a green trapdoor. Percy pulled the cord. The door swung down, and a wooden ladder clattered into place. After he went up. Chiron turned to me. "Hmm? Something to say?" I asked in a hopefully not rude tone. "I've had enough of people staring at me thinking, I summoned that hellhound." "Y/N, I assure you I don't think you'd do that. I am just confused as to why it followed your command." "Did you maybe forget to tell us something? I really can't seem to find out who you are." "Well... I don't think I forgot to mention anything. Maybe the fact that water hates me, I've never been on a plane, and I am low-key kinda scared of the dark depending on the situation." "Water hates you?" Grover asked. "First time swimming, beach, I was 5. I drowned at a supposedly 3 feet deep water. I haven't been near any bodies of water ever since. Until I met Percy, I drowned at the beach again. If I wasn't mistaken I was few meters away from the water and it pulled me and I almost drowned." "It would seem, Poseidon hates you. Why would he?" "My parents must've realized that fish god hates me and didn't take chances on the others." I could tell Chiron wanted to continue but Percy came down, "Well?" Chiron asked. He slumped into a chair at the pinochle table. I could see he wasn't happy. "Are you okay?" I asked him. He looked at me warily and nodded. "She said I would retrieve what was stolen." Grover sat forward, chewing excitedly on the remains of a Diet Coke can. "That's great!" "What did the Oracle say exactly?" Chiron pressed. "This is important." "She . .. she said I would go west and face a god who had turned. I would retrieve what was stolen and see it safely returned." "I knew it," Grover said... Chiron didn't look satisfied. "Anything else?" "No," He said. "That's about it." I took a hold of Percy's hand. And he gave me a look that said, 'I'll tell you later.' "Very well, Percy. But know this: the Oracle's words often have double meanings. Don't dwell on them too much. The truth is not always clear until events come to pass." "Okay," I said, anxious to change topics. "So where do we go? Who's this god in the west?" "Ah, think, Percy," Chiron said. "If Zeus and Poseidon weaken each other in a war, who stands to gain?" "Somebody else who wants to take over?" he guessed. "Yes, quite. Someone who harbors a grudge, who has been unhappy with his lot since the world was divided eons ago, whose kingdom would grow powerful with the deaths of millions. Someone who hates his brothers for forcing him into an oath to have no more children, an oath that both of them have now broken." I thought about my dreams, the evil voice that had spoken from under the ground. "Hades." Chiron nodded. "The Lord of the Dead is the only possibility." A scrap of aluminum dribbled out of Grover's mouth. "Whoa, wait. Wh-what?" "A Fury came after Percy," Chiron reminded him. "She watched the young man until she was sure of his identity, then tried to kill him. Furies obey only one lord: Hades." "Yes, but—but Hades hates all heroes," Grover protested. "Especially if he has found out Percy is a son of Poseidon... ." "A hellhound got into the forest," Chiron continued. "Those can only be summoned from the Fields of Punishment, and it had to be summoned by someone within the camp. Hades must have a spy here. He must suspect Poseidon will try to use Percy to clear his name. Hades would very much like to kill this young half-blood before he can take on the quest." "Great," Percy muttered. "That's two major gods who want to kill me." "Hey, I beat you, I got all of them." I smirked. I was trying to lighten up the mood and Percy finally cracked a smile. "But a quest to..." Grover swallowed. "I mean, couldn't the master bolt be in some place like Maine? Maine's very nice this time of year." "Hades sent a minion to steal the master bolt," Chiron insisted. "He hid it in the Underworld, knowing full well that Zeus would blame Poseidon. I don't pretend to understand the Lord of the Dead's motives perfectly, or why he chose this time to start a war, but one thing is certain. Percy must go to the Underworld, find the master bolt, and reveal the truth." A strange fire burned in my stomach. The weirdest thing was: it wasn't fear. It was anticipation. I wasn't feeling scared of anything right now. I felt like I could face anything. I was ready to take him on. Anyone in a matter of fact. Besides, if my mom and dad might be in the Underworld... which would be unlikely. Who knows maybe I could bribe him and talk him into reviving them. Or what if he's misunderstood? What if there's a plot twist somewhere here, and it actually wasn't Hades's fault? Grover was trembling. He'd started eating pinochle cards like potato chips. The poor guy needed to complete a quest with us so he could get his searcher's license, whatever that was. This was suicide. "Look, if we know it's Hades," Percy told Chiron, "why can't we just tell the other gods? Zeus or Poseidon could go down to the Underworld and bust some heads." "It might not be him you know." I added. "She's right, suspecting and knowing are not the same," Chiron said. "Besides, even if the other gods suspect Hades—and I imagine Poseidon does—they couldn't retrieve the bolt themselves. Gods cannot cross each other's territories except by invitation. That is another ancient rule. Heroes, on the other hand, have certain privileges. They can go anywhere, challenge anyone, as long as they're bold enough and strong enough to do it. No god can be held responsible for a hero's actions. Why do you think the gods always operate through humans?" "You're saying I'm being used." "I'm saying it's no accident Poseidon has claimed you now. It's a very risky gamble, but he's in a desperate situation. He needs you." "Damn, my parent doesn't? I'm going on a deadly quest thanks to Arthur Curry right here. Least they could do is support me and let me know They'll be proud of me saving the world." I huffed. "You've known I was Poseidon's son all along, haven't you?" "I had my suspicions. As I said... I've spoken to the Oracle, too." I got the feeling there was a lot he wasn't telling us about his prophecy, but I decided I couldn't worry about that right now. After all, I was holding back information too. "So let me get this straight," I said. "We're supposed go to the Underworld and confront the Lord of the Dead." "Check," Chiron said. "Find the most powerful weapon in the universe." "Check." "And get it back to Olympus before the summer solstice, in ten days." "That's about right." Percy and I looked at each other then we looked over at Grover, who gulped down the ace of hearts. "Did I mention that Maine is very nice this time of year?" he asked weakly. "You don't have to go," Percy told him. "I can't ask that of you. "Oh..." He shifted his hooves. "No... it's just that satyrs and underground places... well..." He took a deep breath, then stood, brushing the shredded cards and aluminum bits off his T-shirt. "You saved my life, Percy. Both of you did. If... if you're serious about wanting me along, I won't let you down." I felt so relieved I wanted to cry, though I didn't think that would be very heroic. I wasn't sure what good a satyr could do against the forces of the dead, but I felt better knowing he'd be with us. "All the way, G-man." Percy turned to Chiron. "So where do we go? The Oracle just said to go west." "The entrance to the Underworld is always in the west. It moves from age to age, just like Olympus. Right now, of course, it's in America." "Where?" Chiron looked surprised. "I thought that would be obvious enough. The entrance to the Underworld is in Los Angeles." "Oh," I said. "Naturally. So we just get on a plane—" "No!" Grover shrieked. "Percy, what are you thinking? Have you ever been on a plane in your life?" I shook my head, feeling embarrassed. My mom had never taken me anywhere by plane. She'd always said we didn't have the money. Besides, her parents had died in a plane crash. "We're not allowed to fly because Zeus is a stuck up who doesn't want others touching his stuff without permission." "Y/N!" Grover panicked when loud thunder echoed above us. I wanted to yell, 'Oh shut up thunder boy.' But I still wanted try fulfilling my promise to Luke with all I can. "Percy, think," Chiron said. "You are the son of the Sea God. Your father's bitterest rival is Zeus, Lord of the Sky. Your mother knew better than to trust you in an airplane. You would be in Zeus's domain. You would never come down again alive." Overhead, lightning crackled. Thunder boomed. "Okay," I said, determined not to look at the storm. "So, I'll travel overland." "That's right," Chiron said. "Two companions may accompany you. Grover is one. The other is Y/N. But someone else has already volunteered, if you will accept her help." "Gee," I said, feigning surprise. "Who else would be stupid enough to volunteer for a quest like this?" The air shimmered behind Chiron. Annabeth became visible, stuffing her Yankees cap into her back pocket. "I've been waiting a long time for a quest, seaweed brain," she said. "Athena is no fan of Poseidon, but if you're going to save the world, I'm the best person to keep you from messing up." "I'll gladly give you my spot and all but... Percy and I are a duo." I lifted my fist which he bumped. "But she's right, we can't leave the world at the hands of two idiots and a scaredy-cat." "Can't we have four people on a quest?" "You can also pick more than two people to join, but this is considered dangerous as three is a sacred number. Any more than three on a quest could result in a catastrophe, including a member of the quest going missing, dying, or the quest failing." "Willing to risk it Peabody?" She gave me a glare. No. I assure you no one shall be lost in this quest. They were all looking at me weirdly. "What did you say?" "I asked if you were willing to risk it...?" I was confused. "Y/N you're doing it again." "Doing what? I am literally not doing anything wrong. Wanna fite me? I will back out of this quest." I gave an exaggerated glare. Annabeth turned to Chiron, who was looking down on me. "I suppose... if Percy is willing to risk it and all parties approve. I could allow this as a four person quest." "Well, I call not it to the dying person." I raised my hand. "But you can come Peabody. We need a not so stupid guy." "Well, if she say yes..." "I-I... don't really..." "I want to come." "I suppose you have a plan, wise girl?" Her cheeks colored. "Do you want my help or not?" "A quartet," I said. "Hopefully it works." "Excellent," Chiron said. "This afternoon, we can take you as far as the bus terminal in Manhattan. After that, you are on your own." Lightning flashed. Rain poured down on the meadows that were never supposed to have violent weather. "No time to waste," Chiron said. "I think you should all get packing." I took Percy's hand and gave him a look to remind him about his quest. "I'll tell you later."

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UwU Haha I'm better now :) I am sorry for being on haitus And for some parts that I might've forgotten to erase UwU -kookie-doughs

Taglist?

@gayer-than-the-gayest-gay @the-natureofme @booknerd-3000

[still-a-morosexual-help]

OBEY ME! LESSON 46 DETAILED SUMMARY + THEORIES

This lesson’s got two locked chapters that I can’t unlock :’)

D takes them to the casino where they meet Mammon in the Lamp event outfit. When he laughs and tells them that they must have forgotten who he is if they think they can take the money MC ignores all of this to ask him wtf he’s wearing. Mammon blushes and tells them that they have no right to criticize what he’s wearing considering what they’re wearing. Then he says also Lucifer wtf happened to you!? He laughs and teases Lucifer about getting shrunk and how he could accidentally step on him and kill him rn or how Beel might eat him as a snack. I saw someone say that Mammon was a little shit who was also BabyTM and like Yess!??? I love when we get to see more of the asshole side of him specially when we already know how soft he is. Man’s an onion :’) Beel says he wouldn’t do that unless Lucifer hid inside a piece of cake and Beel swallowed him whole without realising. Lucifer, off screen: “You’d better realise I was there!” And Like??? That’s the point Lucifer wants to argue? Not the fact that he wouldn’t hide inside a cake? Mammon says whatever and that he’ll take Lucifer from them so he can have fun with his new toy anyway RIP to Mammon who dies after this lesson. “Mammon, Avatar of Greed, Appears”- gonna have Pokemon Battles from now on, I can’t believe this what this dating sim has evolved into :D Mammon uses wind to lift Lucifer up and bring him towards him. MC has a flashback to the previous night and commands Beel who transforms into a demon and whose body starts moving on its own, Beel then cancels out Mammon’s spell and uses a wind spell to send Mammon flying. Beel transforms back to his human form and is shocked by what happened. Solomon says MC did a good job commanding Beel though they weren’t able to draw out all his powers. They get the armour, which Beel thinks is too flashy but MC tells him it looks great which he is happy about. D tells them about a rumour of Satan attacking a town up north.

As they walk through the woods Lucifer talks about how much he’s gonna love beating the shit outta Mammon when he’s back to normal and waves MC off when they ask him to go easy on Mammon. Beel says that Lucifer used to be a lot nicer to Mammon in the celestial realm and how the two of them would team up to go argue with Raphael. Solomon asks if it was Diavolo who got Lucifer to change and what exactly Lucifer had to do to reach the status they now enjoy in the Devildom. Beel seems shocked at this and ask Lucifer if it’s true. He says he doesn’t remember. There’s growling & they’re suddenly surrounded by ghosts. Solomon: Oh yeah lol this is called the Black Phantom Forest. Everyone else: WHY the FUCK didn’t you say so before!? They run from the ghosts and set up camp beside a lake, MC & Beel talk. Beel says how they’ve all changed from their time in the Celestial Realm and he can’t remember when he stopped resisting the urge to constantly eat. But how somethings are still the same and how the brothers have always been together and how they always will be. He brings up the three things the butcher said to maintain a long relationship and how even though they may sometimes falter at the “respect each other” part when it comes down to it the brothers have all three things with each other (Not me sobbing like a baby. It’s the found family trope for me guys). Beel says how he doesn’t know if he’ll be able to fight Belphie if they meet him in the game and how he has so many people who he loves that he doesn’t know who to put first and that he knows many people would kill to have that kinda problem and that as both an angel and a demon he’s being lucky to have the people he loves. MC gets to hold his hand, lean on his shoulder or say nothing and guys I love Beel so much he’s just so pure god. Okay so theory part: I 100% believe (& it’s implied in canon and in the chats too) and the main reason Lucifer is so mean to Mammon now is because he’s scared if he doesn’t discipline him then Diavolo will and he’ll end up with another Lilith situation. That being said I NEED to know how Lucifer came across Mammon in the celestial realm and what he said to make Mammon so loyal to him. PLS om! Give me the boys backstory? I like to think Lucifer raised Mammon the same way Simeon is raising Luke and that’s why you can see some of Lucifer’s traits in Mammon whenever he becomes serious about something and why Mammon sometimes slips up and calls Lucifer “Dad” and why Lucifer becomes so happy about it. I also think the others would have been older than Mammon was when he first met Lucifer, when they eventually joined the family which is why they share far less traits with Lucifer and why (as far as we know) none of them have called Lucifer ‘dad”. If this is true it also brings up a real interesting dynamic between Satan and Mammon that would be useful when writing fics. You know a little deeply buried resentment and envy about Lucifer having been more of a father figure to Mammon than to the person who is technically his actual son, and since we know for a fact that right after arriving in the Devildom Lucifer starts going through an existential crisis and Mammon’s the one who steps up to look after the others I 100% believe Mammon’s the one who did most of the work in raising a newly created Satan and who taught him how to control his anger so well (cause lets be real it definitely couldn’t be any of the others) which also gives backstory to Satan’s “do you think Mammon’s actually the most decent of us” homescreen comment and more importantly adds spice to the relationship dynamic you can work with in fics.

When they wake up Beel is thankful that they didn’t get eaten. Solomon: not like you would have noticed with all the fun you had *wink wink* Lucifer: wtf Solomon:*WINK WINK* Me: bro they were just talking…  they find out game time and real world time pass differently and come across a treasure chest in the middle of their path. Solomon: Lets open it! :D Lucifer: Expect that’s definitely a trap… Solomon: Exactly! Which is why we should open it! :D MC: Lets open it! :D Lucifer: Why is the entire human species so fucking stupid!? Why were you created without any self preservation!? Who approved this!?  They find medicine, a warding bottle and cat ears. …They put Lucifer into the bottle and Lucifer’s really going through it in this huh. But opening the chest pulls up an inescapable battle with the final boss, and Satan pops up fully immersed in the villain role with an evil laugh and everything. Luci asks MC to use something from the chest and they use the cat ears and Lucifer’s disappointed when they actually work. But it only deals 222 damage to Satan’s 870k HP. Satan paralyses them all and steals bottled lucifer and calls Belphie to finish the others off. I can’t remember if I mentioned this before but how did the brothers know that Lucifer was gonna be mini before they even got home, it would’ve had to be quite a bit in advance for them to so perfectly set up everything… And you know Solomon was really determined to open that chest (I mean so was MC but the whole of season 1 was establishing that their curiosity was gonna get them killed) so…

MC tells Belphie they don’t want to fight him and Belphie says he doesn’t want to fight either but at the same time Satan agreed to give him mine lucifer for a whole day if he defeats them. Beel’s still reluctant and Belphie says Beel doesn’t have to worry cause Belphie isn’t the same small/weak person that Beel always had to protect (and holy shit I need more info on this too?). Beel eventually agrees and says that Belphie’s strong, he tells MC that they weren’t able to use his entire power against Mammon cause he was holding himself back unconsciously but that he was ready now. MC makes Beel do a bunch of wind attacks and they defeat Belphie who’s impressed. Beel says that the magic was actually MC doing it not him (even though he was the one that executed it). Belphie says he’ll join their party if MC promises him that he’ll be allowed to poke at mini luci. MC tells him there’s a damned line and he’ll have to wait his turn. Solomon wonders if MC should be going around giving the right to annoy lucifer to others but also he wants that right too. Even though Lucifer was kidnapped since he’s still in the bottle he’ll be protected so MC’s test is still ongoing. Odd that there was a bottle that would protect Lucifer should he get kidnapped in the chest that was a trap… look we all know Solomon is shady enough that he’s probably behind this right?

During dinner at a tavern the twins are sickeningly soft with each other and Solomon watches them with a smile. For the night the twins end up sharing a room with each other, with Mc and Solomon alone together. In the middle of the night MC wakes up to Solomon still up and looking sad. They ask him what’s up. He says despite how much they walked he still isn’t tired and that seeing the twins together made him lonely. Seeing how much they love and care and understand each other and how they were always together made him wish he had something similar but how when you didn’t age it was difficult to from lasting bonds like that in the human world. MC tells him that all of them care about him and he says he hopes so. Solomon: Lol just the two of us in a room in a game, wouldn’t it be crazy if we made out? MC can either kiss him or kinda stare awkwardly. If they choose the second he apologises for suddenly putting them on the spot and says he won’t try anything else. So this might be kinda an unpopular opinion and I’m genuinely really happy that the side characters are getting more screen time and development because I desperately needed that but I’m not really onboard the romancing option with them? I’m happy they’ve got their own cards now and I love the devilgram stories and romance options in them but I don’t think it makes sense in the context of the main storyline? Barbatos has almost no interaction with MC and though they haven’t shown it yet it’d be weird if he was suddenly into MC. Diavolo spent 2 whole seasons simping over Lucifer why is MC suddenly an option? Besides Diavolo always seems so lonely and I really want him and MC to be really good friends, I want Diavolo to have a friendship where there isn’t some condition that hangs over it like there is with his relationship with Barbatos and Lucifer. The same goes with Solomon. I just want him to have a good solid friendship where there isn’t expectations or power between them. He also initially only seems interested in MC for their power and as a way to train them and eventually genuinely softens up to them, Just the request to kiss seemed outta nowhere? I don’t know why but with Simeon he seems above crushes? I always imagine him seeing MC as another cute kid Lucifer picked up (despite MC being an adult) and having a sort of soft indulgent attitude towards them. I don’t know I think I just want MC to have some friends who aren’t trying to sleep with them.

Solomon is extremely chipper the next morning and Belphie grumpily makes a comment about him having fun and sdfjdvnsjdokd they just talked. Belphie uses his magic to teleport them to Satan’s castle and Beel asked why he couldn’t do that the previous night, Belphie says grumpily cause then Solomon would have missed out on the fun and Solomon agrees and THEY JUST TALKED!? Satan has managed to transform Lucifer into wolf Lucifer and is shaking his bottle hard enough to make Luci wanna puke while Lucifer asks him to stop. MC tells satan to stop and he tells them they won’t be able to defeat him cause they skipped right to the boss battle without taking the long route and levelling up. MC says they’re not gonna fight him cause this whole thing is fucking stupid. Satan says it’s not cause he’s having fun. MC gives him one of their free therapy sessions about how important the bonds between he and his brothers are and how they don’t care more about helping the brothers all get along than some stupid star. Beel comes out spitting facts, saying they all know that Satan actually cares about Lucifer and how that embarrasses him and how he needs to stop hiding it by lashing out. And how Lucifer needs to get his shit together and be honest with satan. That he needs to tell Satan that Lucifer knows he’s his own demon and a really good demon at that. Lucifer says FYI but I never said you weren’t your own great person and Satan blushes and says that unless he wants to look childish he has no option but to accept the olive branch. He tosses Luci to MC. Belphie complains about having stupid older brothers and Solomon says he’s disappointed in Satan and reveals himself as the true secret final boss and FUCK YEAH! I CALLED THAT SHIT! Kinda – I thought he might have just given them a heads up about Luci’s condition. On a different note, Satan needs serious therapy. They all do tbh.

Solomon congratulates MC on what they’ve done so far but says they still haven’t accessed Beel’s full potential and that he’ll give his ‘adorable apprentice’ one more shit at it. Solomon summons Asmo who complains about how long he was made to wait and how he nearly gave up and went to the spa and that no one likes a selfish man. Solomon tells Asmo that he can tell him all this after they get back to the real world and I genuinely want the backstory of how they met and just more about their relationship. At Solomon’s command Asmo uses charm and paralyses Beel and at MC’s Beel uses another wind attack. Asmo says he’s never seen beel do something of this calibre before and he seems more powerful, even more than he was in the celestial realm, Asmo yells at Solomon for just standing and seeming impressed instead of helping him. There’s a bright white light.

Back home with everything back to normal Beel, Lucifer and MC are hanging out by the pool. Lucifer is in an unexpectedly good mood and MC has earned a star, which glows slightly from its place on the symbol etched to the back of their hand. Inside Solomon is feeding the other brothers as punishment. Mammon is sobbing his heart out and Levi is out cold (possibly dead). Satan is given Levi’s remaining share of food and Asmo is in tears. Belphie had made a run for it the second they got home and is nowhere to be found. Solomon talks about how nice Lucifer actually is and how he really loves his brothers cause he just made Solomon make them dinner instead of punishing any of them…. Love that the canonical reason why none of these demons tell Solomon about his food and allow themselves to get tortured is cause they don’t wanna be rude and hurt his feelings. And he thought no one cared about him. If that isn’t love I dunno what is. Beel and MC take a walk while Lucifer sits by the pool and in his words basks in “their screams of agony” While blushing beel says he’s grateful for what happened and how that star is proof that they got closer. Mc can either thank him or say that the star belongs to him. I think they kiss after the second option? For the first Beel says MC’s the one who did the work of drawing out his power. Over the echoing screams from inside Beel asks if they feel like they forgot something and ndfjkfjkdjfefjkn THEY FORGOT DIAVOLO I’M!!!!???? poor baby

[allsassnoclass]

maybe I wrote an off-screen epilogue scene.  maybe I didn’t. click the keep reading button to find out

warnings for mentions of weed and a mention of meds

December 26th dawns slowly over the mountains of Colorado, the sun creeping over the landscape like molasses, and Luke wakes up in the same way.  He stays in the murky space between dreams and waking for a long time, floating through his subconscious until Ashton’s gentle fingers trailing up and down his arm finally pull him back to earth and wakefulness.

“Hey there, angel,” Ashton says, shifting to kiss his bare shoulder.  “Good morning, my love.”

“Morning,” Luke hums, turning on to his back so he can see him.  This bed is smaller than the one at their LA house, pushing them closer together and reminding Luke of the months in Utah back when they first got together and earlier this year, when Luke stayed with him for most of fall semester.

Ashton smiles at him, hazel eyes crinkling around the edges.

“Waking up to you is the best way to wake up,” Luke says, voice scratchy from disuse.  It’s something he’s told Ashton multiple times, but it always bears repeating, and it never fails to make Ashton melt a little.  He reaches forward and brushes Luke’s hair out of his face, hand curling against his cheek.  Luke leans forward and kisses him, warm and slow, stubble scratching his face and mouths stale with morning breath.  Ashton hums contentedly when they pull away, eyes staying closed half a moment longer than Luke’s.

“What time is it?” Luke asks.

“Mid-morning,” Ashton replies.

“Petunia?”

“Already took her out and gave her breakfast.”

“I love you,” Luke says.  Ashton can claim to dislike Petunia all he wants, but that doesn’t change the fact that over the course of quarantine he has been the one giving her more treats and belly rubs.  His willingness to get up with her in the morning means Luke is free to stay in bed as long as he wants, and since Ashton returned he can keep him here, too.

“What do you want to do today?” Ashton asks.

“Be with you,” Luke says.  That was partially why they decided to come to Colorado for Christmas.  Ashton wanted a little bit of snow and Luke wanted to spend uninterrupted time with him.  When spring semester starts, Ashton will be heading back to Utah alone.  Luke has been writing and recording a lot of smaller projects in his home studio that will likely never see the light of day, but beginning in January the band is going to have recording time together again.  He’s needed with them, so he and Ashton will be long-distance until the semester ends since the university isn’t having a spring break and they won’t be traveling more than necessary in the pandemic.

“You don’t have a choice out here,” Ashton says.  “The cabin isn’t that big, my heart.”

“Good,” Luke says, hand sliding down Ashton’s waist.  His pet names have been getting increasingly diverse throughout quarantine, and each one still manages to give Luke heart palpitations, even the weird ones like thunder cat and lemon zest.

He leans forward to kiss him again, shifting easily when Ashton tugs to guide him on top, thighs bracketing Ashton’s waist.  Ashton moves his palms to rest heavily on his legs, and when Luke leans back he’s met with the sight of his black hair messy against the white pillow, a ray of sun illuminating his face and making him glow.

He runs his knuckles along the scruffy beginnings of a beard Ashton has been letting himself grow since classes ended.  It’s prickly, but Ashton doesn’t stop him, just watches with a smile.

“You’re so handsome, Ash,” he says.  The eclectic mountain man vibe he’s been leaning into shouldn’t work, but somehow Luke looks at him and is still as enamoured as he was with the adorable boy he didn’t realize he loved and the beautiful man he married.

“Take a picture.  It’ll last longer,” Ashton says.  Luke moves his hands to the smooth planes of his chest, keeping himself propped up.

“I think that’s your expertise,” he says, reminded of the hundreds of photographs stored on Ashton’s phone or various sim cards around the house, all filled with Luke in various moods, positions, styles, and states of dress.  One of Ashton’s goals for their summer together was to bring his photography skills up to par with his painting, and with lockdown Luke was the only convenient subject.

They have some pictures that they’ll never show anyone, and there are a few that Luke has considered showing the world.  Needless to say, Ashton is his favorite photographer.

“I wish I had my camera now,” Ashton says.  “Every inch of you is exquisite, and with the way you’re backlit by the sun you look ethereal.  If I could capture the expression on your face I would never take another picture again, because none of them would compare.”

He doesn’t yet have the words to respond to that, so he leans down and kisses Ashton again, and again, and again.

-/-

After wasting the entire morning together under the covers and grabbing something quick to eat, Luke and Ashton go for a walk.  It’s not cold enough to be unpleasant, and the cabin has woods to one side with paths stomped down throughout.  They soon lose sight of the house behind them.  Luke hopes they’ll be able to find their way back when the time comes, but if they get lost at least they’ll be together.

“This year was a lot better than it should have been,” Ashton says.

“What do you mean?”

“There’s a global pandemic going on.  There have been thousands of needless deaths, cancelled plans, and teaching was significantly harder and less fun, but I think this year was my happiest year since I can remember.  I feel really good about my art.  I feel like I’m more aware of the world around me.  I’ve stopped feeling as self-conscious.  I finally got put on meds that work, and I’m actively enjoying my life.”

“You smoked a lot of weed.”

Ashton laughs.

“Yeah, I smoked a lot of weed, but I kept it professional at school.”

“Some of your students’ works would’ve been even better if you were high while seeing them for the first time.”

“Luke,” Ashton admonishes.  “I’m not trying to get fired.  I need the administration for reference letters since I’m job searching near LA now.”

Luke stops walking, letting Ashton carry on without him for a few steps.

“You’re job searching?”

“I am.”  He backtracks, meeting Luke where he is and taking his hands.  “Luke, I’m not stupid.  I know that the reason this year didn’t suck was because it was the first year I got to fully spend with you.  You are the love of my life, and I don’t want to try living my life without you for eight months of the year anymore.  When you’re not traveling around the world dazzling people with your talent, I want to be with you at home.  I love teaching, and I’m going to keep trying to do that, but after this semester I’m moving to LA permanently whether I have something else lined up or not.”

“Oh,” Luke says.  “I thought you loved Utah.  You have friends there, and students.  Are you sure you want to leave that?”

This past semester, Luke was able to fully witness Ashton as a teacher.  When he wasn’t on campus, Luke got full exposure to his joys and frustrations.  He sympathized with him over administrative decisions and safety protocols and got to see pictures and video tours of the art submissions that Ashton wasn’t able to see in person.

He gave Daisy an encouraging voice note for finals, because she’s been struggling with trying to complete her senior project given the circumstances and Ashton asked him to since she’s his favorite.

“I have friends here, too, and there will be other students,” Ashton says.  “Even if that wasn’t the case, being with you would be worth it.”

Luke’s heart feels full to bursting.

“Really?” he asks, needing one more confirmation that his dream is going to come true before he lets himself believe it.

“Yes, my sweet.  I’m moving to LA with you for as long as you make that city your home.”

Luke kisses him because the other option is to start crying, something which he doesn’t want to do when they’re out in the cold.

“I think this was one of my best years, too,” Luke confesses.

He came out and then almost immediately deleted his social media from his phone.  He’s learned more about what it means to be a good ally.  He’s grown as a songwriter, stretching himself with different genres and working on his piano skills more, writing dozens of love songs for Ashton and silly ones for Petunia, bad ones, good ones, and amazing ones for himself and for the band.  He figured out what it really means to be a husband, sharing his life with Ashton and able to physically be there for the bad days they both had and celebrate the joyful ones.

Things haven’t been perfect by any means.  They had to postpone the tour, they can’t see anyone, and it often feels like the world is on fire.  Still, though, he’s had Ashton.

Through all of this, he’s had Ashton, and after this semester he’ll always have him with him.

“You’ve been glowing,” Ashton says.  “I’m glad I got to experience it with you.”

“Me too,” Luke says.  “I love you.”

Ashton kisses his nose.

“I love you, too.”

They continue their walk hand in hand, enjoying the fresh air.  Ashton points out signs that animals had been there and Luke ensures that he doesn’t run into any trees while he’s not paying attention to where he’s walking.  The path turns out to be a big loop, and soon they can see other cabins again and then their own back door.

“Wait,” Ashton says before they go inside.  “I want to jump in the snow.  Film it for my instagram.”

Ashton has a professional artist social media, but he also has a private instagram that he posts on frequently.  Luke has gotten very used to snapping pictures or videos for him, always endeared by which pieces of his life Ashton wants to share with the rest of the world.

Ashton takes off his coat for the video and faceplants with a kerplunk.  As soon as he’s done filming, Luke is laughing.

“That was fun,” Ashton says when he hands his phone back to him.  “Want to make snow angels?”

“No, Ash, I want to go inside,” Luke says.  He gets no warning before Ashton has arms around his waist, tackling him down into the snow and making Luke shriek.

“You’re so lucky I love you,” Luke laughs, poking Ashton’s pink nose with his glove.  Ashton beams above him.

“Can we go inside now?” Luke asks.  Ashton hums, then snaps a picture with his phone.

“Now we can,” he says, getting up and offering Luke a hand.  Luke lets Ashton haul him up, then they finally enter the cabin again, stomping snow off their boots and brushing it from their coats.

They don’t have any plans for the rest of the day, or the rest of their stay in Colorado in general, but Luke couldn’t care less about what they’re going to do.  He gets to spend the rest of the holiday with Ashton, and then the rest of his life with him.  Soon they’ll be permanently in the same house again, and he couldn’t be happier.

If Ashton managed to transform an awful year into a good one, Luke can’t wait to experience all of the amazing years ahead with him right by his side where he belongs.

[fierysafrina]

Longing | Satan x reader

Fandom: Obey Me! Rating: General Word Count: 2.760 Genre: Hurt/Comfort | Slice of Life | Fluff | slight Angst Additional tags: death mentioned Summary: This time around every year, you always distance yourself from friends. Being in Devildom, it hasn’t changed. You only hoped no one would notice. Notes: I’ve been having a bit of crappy days this week since the anniversary is approaching and I really need some fluff and comfort, which is how this came to be.

---

You were walking down the busy hallway of the academy. Demons were all around, talking, laughing and walking, minding their own business. Feeling your phone vibrate, you checked it, frowning at the messages Mammon was sending. You chuckled, shaking your head seeing he got himself in another trouble with Lucifer. With a silent sigh, instead of an answer, you put it back into the pocket and continued your way. Halfway, Solomon joined you and you ended talking about projects.

You tried to talk to him, yet your mind seemed obviously absent. And it seemed like Solomon noticed.

“Are you alright?” he stopped just outside the classroom you were about to walk inside to prepare for next class.

Your eyes met with his, the corners of your lips turning upwards in an awkward smile. “I’ll be.” You admitted, cheeks heating up, eyes glossy.

Solomon reached out and brushed his hand against your upper arm, smiling. “I’m here.”

Your expression softened as you nodded. “Thank you…” It was just a whisper in the loud and noisy hallway, but you knew Solomon heard it.

---

Sitting in the common room on the couch, you stared at the wood that crackled in fire. Your legs were beneath your weight, arms wrapped around, brushing your shoulders every now and then. There were voices around, Mammon and Leviathan arguing and Lucifer somewhere in the background. It was quite easy to tune them out from their constant bickering that you didn’t realize a certain demon sitting opposite of you, his green eyes focusing on you.

Satan was about to call for you, ask if you were alright, when Belphegor’s voice woke you from your thoughts.

“There you are…”

You blinked with your eyes and before you realized what happened, Belphegor’s head was on your lap, already sleeping. A chuckle escaped your lips and you shook your head only to startle when Mammon raised his voice, finger pointed at the youngest. “It’s okay,” you said, smile just a bit wider. “I don’t mind if Belphie sleeps here.”

Mammon huffed, his cheeks hot and darker than usual and you couldn’t help but coo at him.

“Aw, is Mammon jealous?” Placing a hand on your cheek, you were grinning as he stammered out an obvious excuse. Leviathan was quick to join and no sooner the two ended in another argument. You chuckled as you looked down at Belphegor, one hand on his head. Your fingers gently caressed his head and Belphegor hummed in approval, expression turning much more peaceful. With a smile slowly disappearing, that painful expression came forward once more.

Satan’s heart ached at the sight. He didn’t know what was wrong, thinking everything was alright, but he noticed how distant you’ve become. He thought it was only his imagination, but now that he took a closer look and approached it differently he saw that look in your eyes. The look of loneliness, grievance and sadness. He thought to all those times, in a span of the last two weeks, thinking if he or the brothers were the reason for this. Was it another demon instead? Perhaps Simeon, Luke or Solomon? Maybe Diavolo said something to you? Yet no matter how much he thought he always came forward with the conclusion that nothing was wrong. At least nothing from their sides.

Which meant you must miss your home back in the human world.

Looking at Lucifer, the oldest was then scolding Beelzebub, who walked into the common room, arms full of snacks. Narrowing his eyebrows, his gaze fell back on you just in time you wiped a tear away. His eyes widened and he was about to stand up, but stilled when you looked at him. The way your eyes widened, horror visible on your expression made his chest feel tighter than before. He didn’t want to see that expression on your face. Not in your eyes. You looked to the side, immediately averting your gaze on the brothers instead, lips pursued into a thin line.

Satan didn’t find a chance to talk about it.

---

“Hm…” Lucifer hummed, eyes focused on your picture. He blinked and looked at Satan, who tried to remain as expressionless as possible, but Lucifer recognized that twinkle of hope in his eyes. “Is there any particular reason you want to go to the human world?”

Deadpanning, Satan resisted an urge to facepalm. “Do I need it?” he asked in a slightly annoyed voice.

Lucifer raised an eyebrow. “Who else will go?”

“Just me and [Name].” he answered almost too quickly. Lucifer couldn’t hide the surprise, but he smiled quickly after. “I believe they’re homesick.”

“They haven’t said anything.”

“Would you if you knew you needed permission to go somewhere?” Satan bit back, annoyance visible on his face. “They can’t exactly leave as they see fit, can they? Not without someone who can travel through eight layers with ease.”

Lucifer remained quiet, eyes focusing back on the picture. Closing his eyes, he sighed. “Alright.” he put the picture back down on the desk. “I do believe you’ll come back before dinner.”

The only answer Satan gave was a nod before he turned and left the office. His footsteps were rushed, quick, but quiet, slight excitement easily spotted. He couldn’t wait to tell you; to see a smile spread across your lips and hug—no, no. Satan shook his head. He couldn’t give his own hopes up that you’d hug him. After all, you weren’t in that kind of relationship.

Slowing down to a normal pace, Satan lowered his gaze to his feet. How should he tell you? Right away? Maybe while you’re reading together in his room or library? During dinner? But during dinner others will be around. Mammon would definitely want to go along and Satan didn’t want that. He wanted to go alone with you. You, him and no one else. Maybe he should bring you to that bookstore you always talked about?

But … haven’t you avoided him ever since he caught you tearing up?

Coming to a stop, Satan narrowed his eyebrows. Caressing his chin, he wondered how to approach you first.

Your laughter brought him out of thinking. He raised his gaze and saw you walking upstairs with Asmodeus. He must have told you about his “horrors” when his nail broke because of your laughter. It didn’t seem like any of you spotted him yet, so he stepped on the staircase that led to the planetarium and watched you. You looked … pretty in Satan’s eyes. He loved how you covered your mouth when you laughed, threw your head back just a bit while wrinkles appeared around your eyes. He often found himself returning the smile even if it wasn’t meant for him.

That was okay. As long as you smiled was everything that mattered to him.

“Oh, right,” Asmodeus seemed to remember just before the two of you parted your ways. “Why don’t you come to my room later? I have some scented candles and bath salts I’m sure you’d love. You’ve been so tense and closed-off these days.” He brushed his hand against your arm and Satan raised an eyebrow.

Your mouth twitched, but the smile continued to be genuine as you replied; “I’ll come. I just need to call someone.”

Satan didn’t like that last sentence. Not by what was spoken, but the tone of it. Something was off. Asmodeus didn’t seem to catch it as he agreed and disappeared down the hallway towards his bedroom.

You, on the other hand, remained standing on the hallway, staring after the demon. Closing your eyes, you sighed and shook with your head, turning around.

Your name left his lips before he could stop himself.

Turning his way, your eyes were wide, surprise evident. “Satan?” you tilted your head, wonder and curiosity overtaking.

Stepping down the stairs, he approached you with a smile. Act natural. “There’s something I wish to tell you.”

Eyes widening, you blinked, but nodded. “Should we go to the common room?” you pointed towards the staircase.

“My room’s closer.” He turned before he could see you pursue your lips into a thin line, freezing on the spot, but stumbling to catch up with him. He was confident. He could do this. He could tell you of the trip.

Who was Satan kidding? As much as he looked calm on the outside, he was panicking inside. No matter how much he tried to come up with something to say, the moment he blurted; “You want to come with me to the human world?” he knew he messed up. If your wide eyes and shocked expression wasn’t proof enough.

“I-I mean—” “Yes!” you overtook him before he could come up with an excuse.

Satan blinked, surprised. “W-what?” he stammered.

“I’d love to accompany you.” You smiled and Satan relaxed almost immediately, because the smile he saw was the smile he fell for.

“Okay,” he smiled back, nodding with his head. “I know it’s soon, but I was thinking of going perhaps tomorrow?”

Tilting head to the side, you nibbled on your lower lip, thinking. “Tomorrow is okay…” you nodded after a moment.

“Alright. Tomorrow after breakfast.” Satan agreed and before he could say anything else, you were hugging him. He tensed in your arms, but quickly relaxed to your warmth. For a moment he could feel your arms shaking. He couldn’t ask you what’s wrong, because you were long gone from his room.

---

The next morning during breakfast, you were sitting on the complete opposite than Satan. He didn’t like that. He wanted to talk about the places you’d like to visit. He didn’t want to speak louder of it to grab anyone else’s attention. He couldn’t help but feel slightly disappointed. Did he upset you somehow? Did you change your mind and didn’t want to go with him anymore? What angered him the most was that he didn’t know the reason.

Which was why he was completely missing the glances you always managed to sneak his way and a small smile that spread across your lips.

---

“Satan,” Lucifer called his name.

Satan turned and raised an eyebrow.

“Be kind.” Was everything the former said before he began walking towards the portal.

Satan stared after his brother in confusion until your voice made him turn towards you. You were panting, cheeks flushed when you came to stop in front of him.

“I’m sorry I didn’t come sooner.” You apologized, sweat dropping. “I needed an excuse to get Mammon out of my room, since I don’t think anyone else knows of this trip.”

This time, Satan’s cheeks turned into rosy shade and you smiled. “I—”

“It’s okay,” you overtook him. “I-I mean, I know you don’t feel that way, but I’m really grateful for inviting me along. It means a lot.” You were sincere and Satan couldn’t find it in himself to correct you. You quickly spotted Lucifer not too far away. Without a glance at Satan, you approached the oldest brother as he began to talk you through the portal traveling.

Satan stood there, eyes focused on you and unable to say anything. Then again, what could he say? He couldn’t tell you he fell for you in this short time since you came to Devildom. He couldn’t risk the friendship you already had.

---

“Is there someplace you’d like to visit?” Satan asked as you strolled down the street of a neighbouring town.

Biting your lower lip, you were hesitating to answer. “There…is one place…” you whispered.

Satan smiled gently, urging you to talk.

“It’s…in my hometown.” You continued slowly. “It’s less than an hour away by bus, so I don’t think we have enough time.” You scratched the side of your cheek, looking away.

“Nonsense,” Satan huffed. “Lucifer didn’t give us the exact time, did he?” his smile turned into half smirk. “Let’s go. If you want to go, I don’t see a reason why we shouldn’t.”

Your eyes welled up and you nodded. “Okay…” you choked and Satan’s eyes widened. “I’m okay. I’m just… Thank you, Satan.”

Without another word spoken, the two of you went on the first bus available to your hometown. The ride surprisingly wasn’t as boring as Satan thought it would be. The two of you talked—well you were the one mostly talking, but he didn’t mind it. Not when he could see your eyes lit up as you passed the houses and towns. It was an interesting experience that Satan wanted to do more than once. Although his gaze was focused mostly on you, he didn’t miss places either.

Yet there was one thing he realized. Despite the twinkle in your eyes, the closer you were getting, the quieter you were becoming. He wondered what was the cause, the problem.

He remembered when you stepped off the bus and looked around. There wasn’t anyone at the station, which seemed to be the usual as you weren’t bothered by it. He followed you upstairs, passing by a bar that played music. People outside, drinking and talking, some just passing by. You didn’t spare them a glance as your pace slightly quickened instead. You passed by a building that Satan realized was actually a hotel, followed by a spa and park. Children were playing outside, their parents sitting on benches or walking not too far behind.

Passing through a small forest, Satan could see a couple of deer behind a fence, eating and children wanting to pet them. He had to catch up with you when you didn’t stop.

“[Name]?” he called your name, but one look at you from the side prevented him from speaking. He followed you in silence. He managed to sneak glances around, seeing a small lake not too far away and what seemed like … a church on top of a hill, if those bells ringing were anything of a hint.

Reaching the top of a hill, Satan frowned when you almost passed the graveyard, relief washing over him for a moment, but tensed when you passed the church instead and walked towards the graveyard. He stopped, looking around, for some reason feeling uncertain. He wasn’t sure if he should follow as he was a demon of all beings, yet he still found himself standing by your side where you were kneeling. He couldn’t hide the surprise when he read the words.

Satan was certain you were talking, tears streaming down your cheeks. He heard his name being mentioned and his brothers, of Devildom and of angels. He stood there in silence, eyes focused on a gravestone of your father, as you spilled your heart out. One look at the date and he understood why you distanced yourself. No matter how many years have passed, you were still grieving. He understood why Lucifer told him to be gentle.

---

Only when the sky grew darker did you remain kneeling in silence. Your knees hurt and your throat was dry, but you didn’t mind that.

“I miss you…” you whispered and closed your eyes, seeing your father’s blurry face. You frowned, but shook your head, a silent sigh escaping your lips. Standing up, you stumbled and reached out your arms to prepare yourself for a fall only to be caught by an arm. Your eyes widened and you looked to the side, seeing Satan watching you in worry.

“Are you okay?” He asked quietly.

“Mm …” you managed to nod, unable to say anything.

With a small smile, Satan held you, one arm behind your back and the other holding your hand. “You’ve been kneeling for hours. Let me help you.”

You averted your gaze, suddenly realizing how close he was. “You know,” you began slowly, eyes falling on the graveyard; “sometimes I still think he’s here. Home.”

Satan’s hold tightened.

You felt your throat closing in on you. “H-he wasn’t perfect…” your voice grew quieter. “But he was always t-there…”

“I’m sorry,” he whispered and pulled you in a tight embrace. You held on his jacket, eyes shut. “We can stay a bit longer if you wish.”

You found yourself shaking your head. “It’s o-okay…” you murmured, finding your voice hoarse. “I talked a lot.” You chuckled and Satan followed. Pulling away, you looked into his and smiled. “Thank you.”

Caressing your cheek, the corners of Satan’s lips turned upwards in a small smile. “You have nothing to thank me for. If you wish, you can come back anytime you want. I’ll talk with Lucifer.”

You couldn’t find your words, but they weren’t needed. Embracing Satan, your shoulders shook as you gave in into your emotions.

[buckleysjareau]

you light my fire

She remembers dragging Emily out the bar, she remembers Emily’s lips on hers, on her chest, on her hips, everywhere else. She remembers everything and she’s not sure if her nausea is brought on by the night of heavy drinking or the impending panic attack. Probably both.

Jemily Firefighter AU 

Chapter Two of Three

Word count: 3356

Read on AO3

Chapter One

When JJ wakes up in nothing but a t-shirt in an unfamiliar place, she panics. The second she notices it’s Emily next to her, she runs. 

Memories from the night before come back as she sneaks her way out of Emily’s apartment and remembers her car is at the station. She remembers dragging Emily out the bar, she remembers Emily’s lips on hers, on her chest, on her hips, everywhere else. She remembers everything and she’s not sure if her nausea is brought on by the night of heavy drinking or the impending panic attack. Probably both.

She pulls out her phone and thanks her lucky stars that Luke gave her his number during the night. 

He answers the phone after the third ring. “I’m surprised you’re up before one, Pennsylvania.”

JJ pinches her nose. “I could say the same about you. Can you get me from the drugstore down the street from Emily’s and bring me to my car?”

“I’d be happy to, but why can’t Emily?”

JJ cringes. “She’s still asleep?”

“I’m sure she wouldn’t-”

“She’s asleep.” She cuts him off.

She hears Luke gasp and then snicker as he finally catches on. “Oh my God, you’re sneaking out?”

“Can you get me or not?” JJ whines. “Please.”

“I’ll be there in ten minutes with coffee.”

JJ sighs in relief. “You’re the best.”

“Don’t you ever forget it, Jareau.”

Luke pulls up in a gray Jeep, blasting some obscene pop song she did not expect him to listen to, but he’s smiling and holding out a coffee so JJ can’t hate him.

“You drank as much as me, how the fuck are you okay right now?”

Luke laughs. “You’ll come to learn that I don’t get hangovers and I’m a morning person. So wanna tell me why you’re sneaking out of Emily’s?”

“I fucked up and it’s too early in the morning to face it.” She sips her coffee as she feigns nonchalance. “I mean, who just, hooks up with their new co worker after their first shift?”

“Morgan.” Luke supplies. “Firefighter Todd isn’t with us anymore but it wasn’t a problem in the house because they didn’t take it to work. You see what I’m saying?”

“I’m so sorry,” JJ puts a hand to her heart at the mention of Firefighter Todd. She wasn’t aware the one-twelve had recently lost anyone. 

“Why?” Luke raises his brow but when he realizes what she means, he jumps to correct himself. “Jordan Todd is still alive and well, she’s just at a different station now.”

JJ facepalms. “I thought you said it wasn’t a problem?!” 

“Wow, I’m not explaining this right. She’s Captain at a new station, okay? She didn’t leave because of Morgan, she was just offered a higher position at the one-twenty two. Morgan just happened to hook up with her his first shift.” 

She sighs. “It wasn’t awkward?” 

“At first, sure, but only for Morgan. She didn’t care too much, and they didn’t take it to work.”

“So you’re saying I should stop being a coward and talk to Emily before our next shift?” 

“That is exactly what I’m saying.” Luke laughs. “Wanna get rid of that hangover?” 

JJ appreciates the subject change so she answers. “Um, duh.” 

“Time to work it off.” He smirks. “I was up and ready because Matt asked me to come help him set up a new crib he got in. It doesn’t seem like you want to be alone right now, and you’re here, so you down?” 

After careful consideration of her own emotions about pregnancy and babies, she agrees. 

“Great.” He grins then grabs his phone at a red let, hitting a contact and putting it to his ear. “Hey, Garcia, JJ is coming to Matt’s, tell him to make enough sandwiches for one more.”

JJ rolls her eyes as Luke’s cheeks burn red at whatever Garcia says over the phone. Like he has any room to judge her when he’s got his own avoidance issues.

“So, you wanna tell me what the hell is up with you and Penelope?”

Luke sighs. “Nothing is going on with me and Penelope.”

“Yeah, because you aren’t making it happen. I saw you last night, pathetically pining after her as Morgan flirted and danced with her.”

“He wasn’t flirting with her, that’s just how they are.” His jaw is clenched and JJ can’t help the laugh that escapes her. “How is this funny?”

“If you’re convinced he’s not flirting, you wouldn’t be getting this peeved.” She shrugs. “Why won’t you ask her out?”

“She’s not into me like that. She’ll probably either think I’m kidding or just flat out reject me.” He sighs. “I’m not this insecure guy I sound like, she just makes me… wacky.”

“Wacky is one word for it.” She laughs. “She seems to look at you a lot when you’re not looking.”

Luke sighs. “You heard Emily, I’m always just gonna be ‘Newbie’ to her.”

“Luke Alvez, you are so dumb. I know we just met yesterday, but you had my back out there on a few of those calls so I trust you. It’s your turn to trust me when I say that Penelope Garcia is definitely interested. You make her blush, dude, I can’t believe you’re this blind.”

Luke still looks unconvinced but there’s a smile threatening to reach his face as he looks over at JJ, putting the car in park. “Yeah?”

“Yes!” She grins. “Let’s go in and I’ll show you.”

They’re greeted by Matt’s wife, Kristy, and JJ instantly loves her. She follows the very pregnant Kristy to their kitchen and finds Matt, Rossi, and Garcia standing at the table, reading something out of a brown book. 

“What’s that?” Luke asks as he walks over.

“The Simmons Stories! When Matt used to travel for his job, he’d come home and tell the kids everything he saw. I begged him to start writing them down, and we found that the kids loved hearing him read it more so they just became… The Simmons Stories.” Kristy grins. “Baby number five kicks every time he reads them, so they’re a hit with them.”

“Baby number five?” JJ whistles. “You’re a saint.”

“One day, little baby Henry or Aubrey is going to be a brother or sister,” Will grins, reaching over to grab JJ’s hand as he drives with the other.

“Slow down, buddy, we still don’t know if it’s Henry or Aubrey in this tiny belly.” She pats the barely visible bump.

“I’m sorry, I’m just so excited to start the family we’ve dreamed of.” He kisses JJ’s knuckles.

“Our family,” 

JJ shakes the memory from her mind and prays no one notices. Kristy is giving her a questioning look, and Rossi is giving her a knowing one. She figures he would know, thinks it’s probably in her file within the Department. 

She smiles at the two of them before clearing her throat. “Luke told me there was a crib to build?” 

Kristy looks to Matt who grimaces before smiling sheepishly at his wife. “Well, uh, we’ve tried quite a bit but you can take a shot at it, if you please?” 

JJ laughs. “Hit me.” 

She understands Matt’s sheepishness twenty minutes later when she can’t get the crews to line up with the half she’d helped build. 

“Color me impressed. You’ve got done more than these guys got done in two hours. How do you know so much about cribs?” Penelope grins and JJ knows she’s messed up by teasing the other’s as well, talking too much about how they’re supposed to do this, stay away from doing that, the silliest mistake in building one of these is following instructions.

“We don’t even know the gender yet, why are we setting up the nursery so soon?” JJ laughs as Will hugs her from behind, staring down at a bunch of pieces of wood, not at all resembling the crib WIll had just tried to build. 

“Your mom paid for the crib, why not set it up, yeah? I just need a bit of help. These directions make no sense!” 

“Leave the building to mama!” JJ grins and thanks her lucky stars that she’s not so pregnant she can’t squat without ease. 

Will keeps an arm around JJ’s upper arm, right by her shoulder. “Hey now, be careful there, you’re holding a fragile package in that body of yours!”

JJ rolls her eyes. “We’re both fine, now help me unload the rest of the parts.” 

“The real question is why Matt doesn’t know more about these things?” She deflects. “He’s got baby number five on the way, he should have practice in this.”

JJ doesn’t check her phone until she’s finally back at her apartment. She’s got six texts from Emily and she doesn’t open them until she’s got two glasses of wine in her system.

Emily P.: wasn’t expecting your side of the bed to be so cold

Emily P.: your bra is still kickin around my place

Emily P.: you don’t have to like, be into me or think it’s serious but we should talk about it 

Emily P.: haven’t had someone ignore me like this after sex since college but

Emily P.: it’s not like we’re adults or anything

Emily P.: or co workers. But see you tomorrow 

JJ knows she’s one hundred percent being a coward but she shuts her phone off without responding. She can tell Emily’s pissed, can’t blame her for feeling that way, but JJ feels stuck. She doesn’t know what to say, even with Luke’s advice to talk to her in the back of her mind, so she says nothing.

She’s scared of how much she feels so soon. It’s too much like Will and she’s barely been divorced a month, she shouldn’t be thinking about someone like this so soon. 

Why is she acting like a teenager right now? Why is she being such a coward?

JJ has been on shift for an hour and the cold shoulder from Emily chills her to her bones. It’s her second shift with the one-twelve and she’s already causing drama, who the hell is she?

This wasn’t JJ. Jennifer Jareau always kept to herself, at her station in East Allegheny and when growing up. She surrounded herself with sports, school work and then firefighting, that was all she ever was until she met Will. Then she became a wife, but that never caused drama. She was simple, JJ was simple.

Now she’s causing tension at her new job and to Emily, she’s and Luke, she’s not simple. She’s a coward. A drama queen, maybe. Stupid?

Luke places himself next to her and takes a plate from the sink in front of them. “So, what happened with talking to Emily before shift?”

JJ hides her face with wet hands as she groans. “I know, I’m a coward.”

Luke snickers at the bubbles that land in her hair before he gets serious, although keeping a smile of pity on his face. “Maybe. I get how hard it is, though, so I won’t be too hard on you. But maybe talk to her soon, because I know Emily, and she’s never this cold unless she’s hurt.”

JJ sighs. “You’re right, I need to man up and talk to her.”

“She’s in the gym right now.”

“Talk to her now?” JJ questions.

“Now’s as good a time as any.” He winks as he walks off. 

She hates it, but he has a point, so she dries her hands and hypes herself up before walking down to the gym. She finds Emily bench pressing, lifting a weight high enough to warrant a spotter. “Need a spot?”

Emily looks up and rolls her eyes before going back to lifting. 

JJ gulps after she doesn’t receive more of an answer. “I know you’re pissed but can we please talk?”

“So now you wanna talk?” She raises an eyebrow as she sits up. 

JJ winces at her tone. “I need to apologize-”

She doesn’t get to finish her sentence before the bell rings for the first time that shift. JJ can’t decide if she’s happy or pissed that she was interrupted.

There’s an apartment fire that calls for Fire, Medical, and Police presence and with that, JJ can tell it’s going to be a tough call. The second they arrive at the scene, she puts every negative emotion she’s feeling and the situation away for when people’s lives aren’t at stake. 

A female cop greets them. “Sergeant Grant,” She holds out her hand to shake Rossi’s.

“Captain David Rossi. What’s the situation?” 

“There’s a hostage situation in one of the apartments that hasn’t been affected yet. Says if we send it Fire and Rescue, he’ll shoot anyone that comes up. Says he started the fire in apartment 9B.” She explains as she points to a window on the second floor, engulfed in flames as well as six stories of apartments. “We have a hostage negotiator setting up right now.”

JJ stands back as Rossi accesses the situation in front of them, frustrated herself that a building is burning with people in it and it’s not cleared to enter. More stations pull up and she watches as Sergeant Grant explains the situation at hand when JJ sees it in the corner of her eyes. On the second floor, a woman breaks her glass window with a chair and screams. 

JJ breaks her own promise to leave her personal life out of the job the second she cries out help me, please, help, I’m pregnant. Everything else fades out, including the rational part of JJ’s brain that’s screaming at her not to run into a burning building that hasn’t been cleared, it’s all drowned out by please, help, I’m pregnant, don’t let my baby die!

She’s bolting towards the building before her mind can even catch up with her feet, hears Captain Rossi yelling for her to stop, there’s a man with a gun in one of these apartments, but she can’t get herself to stop running. 

By the time she gets to the second floor and to the apartment she prays she calculated the location correctly, she notices Emily is behind her with her mask and a mask in her hand. 

JJ kicks the door, kicks it harder when it doesn’t budge and she hears a shout. 

“JJ!” She hears clearly, and before she can turn, a beam swings down and everything goes black.

When her eyes flutter open, she can’t tell the past from reality. Callahan and Reid are standing over her, checking her over but all JJ can feel is the phantom pain in her uterus, and all she can hear is her own screams. 

“The baby, the baby! Henry! Aubrey!” JJ wails, clutching onto her stomach and feels the small bump, can sense the lifelessness. Anderson stands over her, tries to get her to stop screaming and calm her enough to check her over. 

“Jennifer, you need to calm down so we can check you over. Captain Strauss already called Will, he’s meeting us there, okay? Calm down.”

“My baby!”

“JJ! You have to calm down!” Emily soothes. “You need to be checked over.”

“Henry,” She sobs. “Baby-”

“I’m so sorry Mrs. LaMontagne. Between the blast and the impact, it led you to miscarry.”

Will grips on tighter. “I’m so sorry, Will, I’m so sorry. I didn’t tell them, I was going to tell them.”

“You with us Jayje?” She gasps awake. “Hey, there you are. Keep your eyes open, yeah?” 

Anderson? No, that’s not Anderson. Alvez? No, that’s not right either. Reid? Reid seems right. 

“Yeah, it’s Reid, c’mon, keep your eyes open for us.” He brings a light pen to her eyes. “Follow me?”

She tries her best to follow, she does fine, but she can’t keep her eyes open any longer. For a third time, everything goes black.

When she wakes again, she hears beeping. She sees white walls and smells peroxide and she thinks she’s in a hospital until her eyes land on Emily. 

“Is this Heaven?” Her voice is raspy but she knows Emily hears her when she jumps.

Emily rolls her eyes. “You should be so lucky.” 

“Waking up with you by my bedside? I feel pretty lucky.” She winces when she tries to move.

Emily laughs before she turns serious again. “You’re really fucking stupid, you know that?”

Everything comes rushing back after that. The apartment fire, the hostage situation, the-

“The pregnant woman? What happened to her?” She demands.

Emily rushes to push JJ back down. “JJ, you can’t be up right now.”

JJ pushes back. “Emily, what happened to her?” 

Emily gulps. “She’s in critical condition last I heard.”

“No. No.” JJ breaks. “The baby?”

Emily shakes her head. “I haven’t heard anything, but that doesn’t matter right now. What matters is you being okay and you’re clearly not okay. What the hell was that, JJ? We’re a team, we have each other’s backs, but that building was not cleared and it’s like the second you saw that woman, that didn’t matter.” 

“It didn’t.”

“What?”

“It didn’t matter.” JJ shakes her head. “I’m sorry.”

The doctor walks in before Emily has the chance to say anything. JJ tries her best to listen to what the doctor tells her, listens enough to know she has a concussion and that she needs to take it easy for the next two weeks. She almost doesn’t want the doctor to leave, because she knows the second he does, Emily is going to ask. 

And she does. She asks, but not in a way JJ expects. “Who are Henry and Aubrey?” 

JJ sucks in a breath. “Or.”

“What?”

“Henry or Aubrey. It was too early to know the baby’s gender.”

Emily gasps. “JJ…”

“We had the crib set up, though. Didn’t matter that we didn’t know the gender, we were just so excited.” She sniffs. “I planned to tell my Captain that I was pregnant that day, but I never got the chance. We were called to a farm fire, and everything was going fine and normal until it wasn’t… there was an explosion. I remember screaming, the pain was so bad.”

Emily grabs her hand. “Oh, Jayje, I’m so sorry.”

JJ shrugs. “I’m sorry I’ve been a coward.”

“We don’t have to talk about that right now.” Emily whispers.

“I do.” She gulps. “Please.”

Emily just nods and keeps quiet.

“The last time I felt this strongly about someone this quickly, we got married after three months. Now he’s not here, he wanted a divorce because of how I handled losing my baby. I can’t- I can’t ruin something again because of my- guilt. I woke up next to you? Before I fully panicked and ran? I wanted it to keep happening and I was scared because-” She chokes on a cry. “Because things will end horribly if they go this fast. I left because I was scared.”

It’s quiet, too quiet, for too long. JJ knows her heart is racing and Emily does too because of the monitor. That’s what makes Emily break the silence. 

“I know firefighting is a fast paced job, always on your toes and racing to get to fires, but you don’t always have to be a firefighter.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, you can take things slow once in a while. There’s nothing wrong with that.” Emily smiles. 

“Take things slow.” JJ repeats. “Yeah.”

“I don’t know about you, but I forgive you.” Emily smirks and grabs one of the cups of apple juice sitting on the tray in front of JJ, before handing her one of her own. “Friends?”

JJ smiles. “Friends.”

Emily starts to giggle and toasts the apple juice in her hand. “To taking things slow!”

JJ snorts in the middle of drinking from the tiny cup, apple juice spilling down her hospital gown, which JJ finds uncomfortable but Emily forgives her and is smiling at her like they’re the only two people left on earth, so JJ can’t bring herself to be mad. 

“To taking things slow!”

[multsicorn]

Is Wei Wuxian your fave? Please do the meme with answers about Wei Wuxian. Thank you

[HELLO you sent me this like? weeks ago? I am answering it now!]

haha YES he IS!  (Which is very convenient, that, when one’s favorite character is also the protagonist - it means that my priorities and the show’s tend to be pretty well in alignment.)

(and why are you asking me when you’re not even in this fandom!  but I

[this is really RIDICULOUSLY long, btw.]

How I feel about this character

I love him so much OMG… I was just thinking, yesterday or maybe this morning, that it’s early to tell, y’know, but he might join my ~FAVORITES OF ALL TIME.~

He is just!  Set up so well, (~it’s cheating,~ no, that was gonna be a post), he loses so fucking much (parents, foster family/home, newly created found family/home, beloved sister, #it’s complicated wrt beloved brother, um, magical ability (#it’s complicated), hm, DIES), and he also - gets? does? etc. so fucking much.  He’s good at way too many things tbh, at fighting and playing the flute (it’s also a form of fighting, it’s a magical flute), at charming people and inventing ~NEW MAGICS~ and… pissing people off? that’s a skill lol?  He takes up farming/gardening, cause he rescued a bunch of prisoners of war who need something to eat, (and he misses food from home); he takes up raising a very small boy (he says! miss me with saying he’s not!) as his own, because someone needed to, because he was one of those same prisoners of war.

He NEVER FUCKING STOPS, no matter what anyone thinks, no matter the cost.  He’ll take a curse mark on himself or go into a dangerous trance or (any number of other things that happen in the plot) for someone he doesn’t know, or doesn’t like… just because he thinks he can, is a lot of it, and isn’t that fascinating.  And because he can, he couldn’t not.

What I meant, though, re: ~the man is non-stop!~, is: he does it with a smile, a laugh, a joke.  A bowl of wine and a delighted stroll through the woods, looking around at the leaves, or a stop at a stall selling snacks or cute ornaments.  He’s always working, always thinking, always playing - and! these are the same thing! for him!  Even though his play definitely can get more physical than anything else, there’s always still this alertness looking around for an unexpected trick.  And the work he chooses to do, not the fighting, but invention and the studying to back it up, traveling and helping people with their monster/ghost/spirit problems… that’s play, for him, it’s fun.  There’s always something new and interesting to see or find or learn or make.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

LAN WANGJI aka his canonical soulmate/boyfriend/husband/cultivation partner, the one who knows him!, my heart.  Howwww… can I explain their connection?  They love each other, of course, and probably more importantly, they get each other… they trust each other, they work so well together, they make each other so happy.  That’s one of the things that I love, that although they’re both people who are highly liked and/or admired generally in their society on a superficial level, that they’re both fucking weird people?  Wei Wuxian is charming and Lan Wangji is impeccably virtuous (and they’re both very talented), but when you get to know them, Wei Wuxian never fucking shuts the fuck up and Lan Wangji will barely say one single word… they’re both a lot to handle, in a number of different ways!  But they.  Just like each other, a lot.

And the trust between these two.  Slays me.  Wei Wuxian lets Lan Wangji hold a sword to his throat, cause he knows Lan Wangji will know if he’s ~gone too far.~  Lan Wangji defies his clan, his family, the whole cultivation world, for Wei Wuxian, because he knows, that Wei Wuxian is and was right.  They pursue justice, goodness, together… they find it in each other.

People try to set up an opposition between ‘marry your best friend’ and ‘star crossed lovers’ high-drama types of scenarios?  But these epic losers (she says with love) are both… there’s no reason why not, after all.  And I love ‘em SO MUCH.

JIANG CHENG, who is is his foster brother.  Usually I’m not one for incest?  It only tends to be something I ship when a sibling bond between characters is broken, or twisted, … or fails to really exist in the case of Luke/Leia type scenarios.  (I have never watched a Star War, but I did read Splinter of the Mind’s Eye, okay.)  The relationship between Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng (and their sister, Jiang Yanli), very very much does exist, but… Jiang Cheng stabbed his sword into the rock of the cliff that Wei Wuxian was hanging off of, and yelled at him to go to hell.  And Wei Wuxian finished yeeting himself off the cliff, and D I E D.

(it’s totally a romantic setup!  what!?)

Anyway, they both really really love each other, they need to reconcile ASAP PLZ, and pairs of characters who both really really love each other but also have deeply conflicted and fucked up and sometimes even murdery intentions towards each other are extremely my jam.  I want to smush them together!  Mostly involving conversations, and extremely fraught invitations to visit, and small significant gestures.  But also sometimes involving sex, because… why not.

SOMETIMES JIANG YANLI, though only in concert with Jiang Cheng as an OT3, because if Jiang Yanli’s still alive… you can’t have two of the three siblings together ~like that~ without a third.  (So I guess this is the first exception that I’ve found so far to my usual pattern!  Of only shipping incest when it’s already all fucked up.  Jiang Cheng’s got enough fucked-up-ness for the all of them?).  Anyway, I would like to thank the scene where Jiang Yanli shows Wei Wuxian her wedding dress for including the line from Jiang Cheng ‘you don’t think she’d marry you!?’ (to which I always say, it’s okay, Jiang Cheng, no one is leaving you out! how very dare you).

Together the two of them (Jiang Yanli and Wei Wuxian) are sweet and mutually supportive, and simply the delight of fucking even further with societal expectation and rumor is not going to get me shipping that.  But as a threesome!  Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian struggle with issues of insecurity, of jealousy, vis-a-vis family, and poor Yanli - she’s always trying to be enough for both of them, for everyone, and it must be very hard, … she reconciles the two of them, it’s a pattern, and they’re more united in thinking she deserves the world than they are in anything else.  It can be fun to play with.

WEN NING!!  Wei Wuxian walked away from his family and set his face against the cultivation world for Wen Ning, and Wen Qing, and their followers.  He says he would’ve done it for anyone, but in fact he does it - the prison break, the dive all the way down into dark magic - for Wen Ning.  He brings Wen Ning back to life.  Which is a huge gift, but not necessarily one that Wen Ning would’ve accepted?  But.  He doesn’t get to be asked, he was dead.

And Wen Ning, in turn, is just ridiculously incredibly loyal to Wei Wuxian.  It’s part of how Wei Wuxian brought him back to life, but - he’s the knife in Wei Wuxian’s hand.  (That’s almost literally what his sister, Wen Qing, says).  That sort of intimacy, being a human weapon, turning over your own volition, (not voluntarily! but Wen Ning’s okay with the fact that it’s a thing that happens!), to someone else, is… man, it’s a lot.

And there’s also the things Wen Ning does control: after Wei Wuxian comes back from the dead, (so they’re undead buddies! ;) in different ways), he follows Wei Wuxian everywhere he goes.  Which causes some problems!  One cannot have a zombie everywhere, with one, at all times.  Even if he does save your life when you don’t expect needing it.  … so, anyway, they both do these huge amounts of things for each other.  They won’t give up on each other.  They keep trying to take care of each other - Wei Wuxian gives Wen Ning his sword to wield.  They never ever meant to depend on each other like this, but that’s what happened when they wouldn’t let go - and now they don’t need to, by the end of the story.  But that story is A LOT, and I want them closer, and also to fuck with the controlling-the-undead angle ;).

XUE YANG!  This is a never-ending list, lol.  Anyway, if Jiang Cheng was the answer of ‘ship my two favorite characters,’ this is very much the answer of ‘ship the two characters that are hottest to me.’  ;).  Anyway, I should point out that I don’t ship-ship them.  Xue Yang’s a mass-murdering sociopath.  And even if you can catch him in the plot before he goes all mass-murdery… Wei Wuxian would never love Xue Yang.  (Never-minding the distinction between ‘love’ and ‘in love with,’ he definitely loves all the above.)  But would Wei Wuxian fuck Xue Yang?  Maybe!  If you can set it up right.

(my current attempt stalled out with Xue Yang threatening to murder a small child in Wei Wuxian’s care, so… there’s no fucking in that case.)

Anyway.  They’re very similar in some ways.  They’re fearless, they really really hate boredom, they love to fuck around… just for fun.  They’re both curious!  When Xue Yang meets Wei Wuxian, for the first time, he asks him about the charm Wei Wuxian had invented that he’s fighting him with.  While they’re fighting.  (Which really strikes me as a very Wei Wuxian move.)  Pity about the being evil thing, lol.  But Xue Yang is a demonic cultivator who’s following on the magical paths that Wei Wuxian laid out… so a sorta teacher/disciple thing could be interesting.  Again!  If you could get around the killing people thing for just a second, before of course bringing it back in to smash everything down.

and that is, finally, all the major answers re: actively shipping, (really my main ships in this show are Wei Wuxian/almost everyone he significantly interacts with, and then I guess some other people who aren’t Wei Wuxian can also have some ships too?), but a few more quick answers I’d Definitely Read:

NIE HUAISANG in a friends-who-have-sex way back during their time in summer school together.  You can’t tell me Lan Wangji thought that he wasn’t walking in on a Wei Wuxian/Jiang Cheng/Nie Huaisang orgy, that one time!  You can’t tell me that Nie Huaisang lent Wei Wuxian gay porn book(s?) and never at least tittered about the idea!  Their friendship at that point isn’t all that deep but… I think they both might very well find it a fun way to ~let off steam,~ or whatever, and I’d be into it.

WEN QING, even though I really like the fact that her friendship with Wei Wuxian is a hundred percent platonic (yes, it is, I’ll fight you).  I love how they run the Burial Mounds together, I love the mutual sympathy and the mix of teasing and deadly seriousness in their dynamic, what I really want is SO MUCH MORE of just their friendship - and working-together partnership! - but, you see, I have a weakness, for friends who are not romantic!  Just friends!  But they fuck once or twice or in a while for fun, in between doing things that are more important.

(Also I particularly like when they’re exes who are better off as friends, in a modern AU?  Idk somehow it just feels like a perfect fit for these two.)

… and I realize belatedly that the question asked ‘romantically’ and not ‘non-romantic fuck-buddies’ and therefore half of my answers don’t even apply, but whatever, I do what I want, and honestly for non-OTP-level ships I’m just as likely to ship them as fuckbuddies as I am romantically.  So there, meme, I cannot be constrained.

My non-romantic OTP for this character

I COMPLETELY REFUSE TO CHOOSE: like, okay, fixing his relationship with his brother is the number-one most important thing to me about how canon ended.  So I guess??  I’d have to say that??  YUNMENG SHUANGJIE (the Pride Twins of Yunmeng) 4EVER, sure, definitely.  They both sacrificed everything for each other!  More importantly, to me, I think both… of them, just really miss each other a lot.  Jiang Cheng’s fucking furious at Wei Wuxian, and Wei Wuxian’s pretty much given up on making any sort of attempt to change that, but I love them both and want them both to have everything that they still can that they want in life, and that means each other.

But I also love Wei Wuxian’s friendship with Wen Ning!  And his friendship with Wen Qing!  So much!!!  They are ALSO family, okay, they made a new home together (and then it died) ;___;.

And then!!!  The way he relates to the kids!  Is just so wonderful.  I love how he tries to be the ‘cool uncle’ to Jin Ling, how he balances the side of ‘I was an obnoxious brat too at your age… and in fact I kinda still am!’ with being a very responsible and caretaking adult.  I love the way that he gets down in the mud and plays with Sizhui as A-Yuan, being silly, and is also so thrilled and proud of Sizhui as an adult.  So uh yeah these are all of my favorite things

My unpopular opinion about this character

Hmmm I’m not so sure what’s unpopular.  (Besides a lot of my non-canon-OTP ship choices, but those aren’t really ‘opinions about the character.’  I don’t think he’s likely in near-canon-verses to be with anyone besides his husband, I just like stories where it can happen!).

I think I’ll say: I think he’s generally a pretty happy person.  He hides suffering with smiles, certainly!  That’s what he does!  But even though he has lost a lot - and even though I think he feels guilt over some things, like his sister’s death, and his nephew’s being an orphan - he doesn’t tend to dwell, on either the sorrow or the guilt in his life.  He is genuinely pretty okay... and finds ways to be okay, even happy, even in the worst parts of his life, day-to-day!  Even in the Burial Mounds, for example, when he’s missing his family and his almost-not-quite-yet boyfriend, ... sometimes he drowns in the missing, yeah, but far more often he’s happy with the things and the people that he’s growing there.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon

HE AND LAN WANGJI SHOULD HAVE KISSED???  That’s the most obvious and unarguable thing.  They’re together, they’re so fucking together… on the steps of Carp Tower, in ep 42?  Or maybe in the snowy night in the Jingshi, in ep 43, before the scene faded away (to black).  (And presumably multiple times in the eps after that, but, eh, whatever).  The only reason why this didn’t happen is censorship - though I do admit, I love all the post-canon get-together fics.

Also: HE SHOULD”VE STAYED AT CLOUD RECESSES???  With Lan Wangji???  Or Lan Wangji should’ve gone with him, to ~wander the world together,~ though personally I prefer the ‘Lan Wangji is Chief Cultivator’ ending.  Anyway the fact that they separated is bullshit, (although, yes, I know all about that reunion implied in the last scene, but it’s not really satisfactory imo)… but, again, censorship.  And, again, I love!  All the post-canon fics where Wei Wuxian wanders around for some time before he finally ~comes back home~ to Lan Wangji.

Also also: if we’re talking about artistic decisions that weren’t cause of censorship: he and Jiang Cheng should’ve thawed just a little.  Been just a little bit more hopeful.  Towards each other, at the end of the show.  Jiang Cheng wanting to say something, but not..?  It was very ow, to me, it’s not a bad ow, but it needs to be remedied.  Let Jiang Cheng find a way to be able to tell his brother he misses and still loves him, please.

[percysbluepizza]

Oh we ARE impertinent

okay since @annabetncnase asked for it, my big ole post, UNEDITED about the Lightning Thief Musical on Broadway. good luck to anyone who attempts to read this shit

ACT 1

Prologue/Day I Got Expelled

Alright so there is big boom lightning at the very very beginning of the show because Of Course there is? But it also comes with a huge flash of light, which startled liTERALLY everyone in the audience. Very fun, good use of technical effects. First guy on is James Hayden (Luke + Some) and he opens with the line. Then KRISTEN FUCKING STOKES (whom I have grown to ADORE) and the rest of the ensemble (Sally, Claiese, and Grover) come on and have this AMAZING choreography. They’re singing and all and then these curtains (which have been up and are on my pic) get pulled away from both sides by the whole onstage cast and CHRIS runs up and does this slide thingy to the very tippy top of the stage, where he sat for a moment, then turned to the audience and started. I about screamed and I’m not joking, he’s so expressive and such a great Percy (god I’m in love with him great work). As the song progressed, I was impressed by the ability with lighting use and all these cool stage tricks to have the Mrs. Dodds and also the pen/sword thing! Jorrel plays Grover so well, he’s so empathetic and caring toward Percy and I!!! So the whole story of him getting expelled is explained and god it is so fucking sad. Percy’s voice cracks. Percy’s fucking upset clearly and doesn’t understand and ouch…. ‘So if you think you are a half-blood’ is said so gently, and then THE DANCING. Chris can dance. Like well. Very well. So during ‘THis ain’t Odyssey’s Odyssey” he did a big ole kick and danced his heart out. SO good.

Strong

So obviously there’s some talking in between the first piece and this one, and there was a scene change when the lights went out and now they’re in Percy’s apartment with his mom and Gabe. Gabe is like… god you seem him and you loathe him bc he’s played so well. Percy sprays a chan of ‘aerosol’ at one point bc Gabe smells. And Chris just captures Percy’s compassion so well… He tells his mom that she doesn’t have to stay with Gabe and doesn’t deserve that and ugh so good. There are genuine blue marshmallows. and the way they did the little fire with the fog in the bucket and Percy’s mom’s comforting him hhh.

The Minotaur/The Weirdest Dream

The transfer to this scene/piece is very quick, Grover comes running in with a trash can over his head and he asks if Percy told Sally about the field trip and she said no and it was just a big mess of miscommunication. He basically gets to the point where he says the Minotaur is after Percy and holy shit. This boy is massive. And the design of it is insane and it’s got red eyes and wow. ‘I hope you’re really a SWORD” and he fight and it’s all just great. Sally goes away, Percy kills the beast and then ‘Don’t pass out…” Poseidon is in a tank top and a open Hawaiian shirt as well as flip flops and just “oh look, a man in a Hawaiian shirt’ He takes the seashell and is just the most confused. And then they bring in Annabeth, pushing her on one of those dolly things and she’s ‘floating’ and the whole thing is a big dream. Up until she tells him “You drool when you sleep” right and the thing is… the banner for CHB unfurls and the lights come back up and all of that and just it’s a true rude awakening. Then he looked around the camp and was so confused, Annabeth (beautiful, amazing, badass Kristin) started explaining what was happening and he had no clue. She then calls for Mr. D  

Another Terrible Day

I don’t think you guys realize how good Jorrel is. Maybe you do but we stan Jorrel. But he comes out dressed in not matching clothes with a bright button up (pink) and plaid shirt, suspenders. He’s angry. Percy explains that he has no clue what’s going and everything’s getting explained to him with the other demigods. The other demigods are so cute and I love them so much. And he’s yelling through a megaphone. Jorrel can do so many roles so well and he did a great job. “You’re a horse?!” also he just clops. Like it’s human legs. Clip clop bitch. With a tail.

Their Sign

Again the transition from the first song to this second one is really fast. Chiron’s comforting but god is Percy angry. I love that tbh. Chris is clearly upset and he feels for Percy. And he shows it. He’s upset and then Percy’s voice goes all soft… Love that. Luke starts being buddy-buddy and showing him that it’s gonna be alright. Supposedly.

Put You In Your Place

Fucking. Sarah. Goddamn. I can’t believe how good she is. We stan so hard. Her fit? Great. Her voice? Belted. Awesome. Annabeth truly out here though. SHe’s intimidating as fuck and she knows what she’s about. There’s so much cool battle choreo in this scene and it just looks great. There’s blocking and stabbing and it looks awesome. Also that guitar riff that she comes in with is rad. And then the bathroom thing. Great. Percy’s cornered and it clearly shows that his powers came as a last resort with stress and the way they flashed the blue lights is just great I love that so fucking much. And they’re asking about the way he figured out those powers and they’re freaked out. Cool shit. Also “The plan would have worked either way.” Holy fucking shit. Annabeth is fucking scary as hell. She gives zero fucks about Percy at the beginning

The Campfire Song

The way they made the campfire is so cool! Very techy. And I didn’t realize they’re sitting around the campfire eating dinner together as a camp. Very family much love I’m a big fan. They’re putting the food into the fire and then complaining and I love it. Percy’s so sweet trying to talk about his mom and then come back around once they tell him what’s going on. Also they have a cute dance they do together. SO unified and lovely. And then THE FUCKING SIGN COMES. Percy’s sign. The whole thing. They’re looking and he’s like “Is that a fork?” “I’m the Son of Poseidon? sweet!) Everyone freaks out when they’re sure he’s a son of Poseidon. Percy is told to go see the “Mummy in the attic” “That’s old people talk for Mom, right?” Cue the Oracle.

The Oracle

This sounds so dumb but kinda like… found the Oracle impressive. Spooky. 10/10 Also… side note… Chris plays Percy with a lot of random mannerisms and movement and it’s really quite fun to watch. Anyway the Oracle is big spooky and she’s in a huge dress and she’s pointing to him and it has all the people who are in the next scene sitting there underneath and moving the dress. Big cool. And the vocals! Sis can sing. And it’s just beautiful bc then Percy has to see Mr. D and Chiron, the first of whom wants to turn Percy into a dolphin. “Percy you have no choice.” “You’re expelling me again?” Basically Percy is getting kicked out of camp bc of his unwillingness to do the quest. And there’s the transition to Good Kid my friends.

Good Kid

Guys oh fuck. Oh shit. Chris just really came out here to kill with the vocals tonight. And My heart? He kinda does a fist thing toward what would be the Big House and walks off to sulk, starting the song and walking around being angry ugh. He climbs up the back of the stage (which is essentially scaffolding) and sits at the end to deliver the sad part of the line when everything goes piano-y and soft and essentially that’s him sitting at the docks at the lake and watching the water. Luke later finds him (“If you’re a son of Poseidon, don’t hide at the lake, that’s where everyone will look.” and talks to him about the quest, where they figure out his mom would be in the Underworld if she was anywhere. Also there’s a trident where Percy is the middle prong and the other two are blue and shine on him UGH yeah

Killer Quest

“Yeah I’ll do it!” Was delivered so well, so sweet and innocent. This kid just misses his mom. Also since when did Luke and Percy get a bro handshake? Grover shows up with a bunch of bags and says he’ll go too (Luke’s chilling in the background) and he gives him the official questing backpack. I think Luke leaves at this point to get some shoes. Annabeth is there with a bag telling him that she’s going too and that her mom will be excited and they’re all dancing together and god I’m so emotional. They dance and they all work as a team so well great work you guys. And the lights turn out with them starting their quest!

Lost

Return from intermission with a literal bang, as there are three demon triplet math teachers on the bus, with Percy on top and Grover and Annabeth inside. The driver’s screaming, they’re screaming, Percy hops off the top and then fights the fury outside and eventually… The bus explodes, with confetti raining over the audience. Awesome. The piece of paper is in Annabeth’s bag pocket actually. And Percy’s trying to be a reassuring friend to Grover, who’s freaking out, and he’s trying to keep Annabeth safe too… ugh great stuff. They move all together when they say “We’re lost in the woods” for the first time. Their priorities really become clear later in the song when they talk about what they’re wanting. Grover could not be more enthusiastic about the squirrel. Also this is the first time we see Annabeth laugh at Percy “I think that’s kind of nuts” is the line and she turns around to laugh into her hand. PURE AS HELL. Wandering aimless through the forest occurs for a minute longer until Percy decides. This point in the musical made me realize that these kids are young. Like 11 or 12. I love that. I felt that in this one. The kids go into Auntie M’s art studio. Annabeth’s asked to take a picture and she’s checking her hair in her dagger, meanwhile Percy’s getting a bad feeling now and Grover’s looking more and more intently at Uncle Ferdinand. Percy is then asked to join in. No camera you say? MEDUSA REVEAL. They do a big battle and Grover ends up picking up Percy and swinging him around to cut off Medusa’s head. Which gets thrown in her own fridge for the time being. Grover leaves.

My Grand Plan

Bitch. This was the moment I teared up a lot. She sat down and started singing and I felt. I FELT. I’m depressed as fuck at the moment and I started feeling things bc of this damn song. Kristin Stokes I love you. Anyway, she’s singing and Percy intently watches, and she’s telling the gods to Wise Up by pointing directly to the sky. SHe’s saying BITCH YOU WILL NOTICE ME. And the pain in her voice when she explains her family situation. The soft part? She’s talking directly to Percy and looking at him, telling him what’s going on. Dear god did I feel. I’m so proud of her my queen Annabeth Chase. She finishes explaining and Percy says: “No more fighting” and she says “Not between us anyway” and they shake on it. I love that. Then Percy decides to have a little fun with the gods and boxes up Medusa’s head. “THey’ll think we’re impertinent Percy.” “Oh, we are impertinent.” He writes both Annabeth and his own name on that box and ships it via the Hermes express. Grover comes back in. “While you guys were in here not solving all our problems, I found these!” “Three Amtrack tickets!?”

Drive

We boarding the train. WE singing. Life is dandy again. Percy sticks his hand in a dog cage and it bites him. They take a tractor which is scaffolding tied to a wheelchair which a guy pulls. They meet Bianca and then they meet Ares after arguing with each other. Cool guy. Also Percy looks so free and proud of himself when he’s on the back of the motorcycle “I mean, look at where I am!” He’s so PROUD holy shit. Also they all put one foot forward during the different lines god the Choreography so fucking cute dear lord. Anyway they’re going and going and they meet Bianca who’s got braids and then they move on!!! I love them! I’m proud. They take another bus. “This time we just won’t blow it up.” They’re sitting on the bus (or train not really sure) and all asleep. Percy’s dreaming now. And Annabeth and Grover are also sleeping. Each is on a chair and it’s kind of cute tbh.

The Weirdest Dream (Reprise)

Percy’s standing there in his dream and he’s very confused. This is ‘scary” and I love that. He’s standing and listening to the these people in his dream talking. Kronos is so fucking scary they literally make him scary. His voice is so deep and spooky and fuck man. Luke’s talking to him (downward, into a pit, technically on the top of the scaffolding) and he’s in a cloak and Kronos says Percy’s name and the lights flash all sorts of colors and then he’s back in his seat. Chris does a bunch of spins until he gets back to his seat and Grover’s shaking him awake, saying he was screaming. Annabeth can’t sleep either. Everyone’s on edge. Thalia’s name was mentioned in the dream and Grover sits up straighter and says he hasn’t heard that name in awhile.

Tree on the Hill

Oh shit this was so emotional. So Grover explains that he didn’t tell Percy this any sooner because he was afraid Percy might not want him to come. Big sad. But he starts the song and let me tell you I never felt like crying more. So Grover’s narrating this story and Percy’s listening on the train and above them, like with the main bridge, Annabeth, Luke and Thalia are slow mo acting out the details of the story until Thalia becomes a tree. Thalia is the same girl that plays Clarriese, and every other character almost omg. But when he’s explaining her turning into a tree, Annabeth and Luke stand behind Thalia and become the branches. So symbolic and so beautiful. Percy comforts Grover and then it’s the last stop.

DOA

THis song. At first I didn’t like it on the soundtrack. Skipped it. But goddamn what a bop. The sparkly dress, the funky tunes, the control of all of the kids so they all dance together. Also dying in a really big bathtub. Yeah. Real. The way they did the elevator with the lights moving in the background was actually super convincing and I Loved that. The dress sparkles all over and all the other background people are in cloaks are dancing too, including James who makes this beautiful jump I love it so much. But they’re all scared and cornered against the light and then have to reconvene together. They all get up from the ground frazzled and then Percy’s shoes start doing something weird. His feet start flying away from him and he’s confused and freaking out and all of a sudden they’re in front of the pit. Oh god the pit was so cool. I thought the feet were shaking and it’s so cool and and the pit literally looks like a pit. I know they’re looking into a light but it’s so scary! The shoes go down into the pit and the tartar sauce joke is made. I love this. SO scary. AND BOLT REVEAL. The line that Percy’s says “betrayed by a friend’ that accuses Annabeth after she pulls the bolt from his bag. I gasped. And then Hades comes around and he’s in a sparkly jacket and says he’ll have his friends and his mom back if he gives him the bolt and then gives them a chance to decide. Everyone walks off stage and he stands there and debates.

Son of Poseidon

Percy’s mom comes out and tells him that what belongs to the sea can always return. She does a little loop around him and he spins in a circle and follows her for a moment. He starts singing and GOD CHRIS. He’s realizing that he has the shell and all that. He blows the conch and a blue light shines on the right side of the stage, the PORTAL. They jump through the portal and they’re all excited that they survived. Standing on the beach and Percy pulled new shoes out and starts putting them on. He tells them that they’re his two best friends and he hugs them close and fuck man the original trio feels. They summon Ares. Ares comes out and he’s fucking ripped and got a pipe. A literal pipe. They start fighting and it looks like they’re losing, Annabeth lost her dagger (which was strapped to her thigh goddamn) and Grover’s down, Percy’s lost his sword. “Percy get to the ocean” He runs to the stage, Kristin and Jorrel run backstage and deliver the blowers with TP. “How about a lot of it!”He yelled and theres the music and he’s relishing the moment, Chris is just giving it his fucking all and there’s a lot going on and I just.. Was amazed beautiful. Great work cast. Ares is washed away and then Percy says: “You can escort us, back to camp.” They’re escorted back.

Last Day of Summer

Percy is standing there and he’s stunned essentially. What does he do now? He gets a letter from his mom with her newest sculpture and that she’s going to school. Annabeth passes him and talks to him about going home and she calls him Seaweed Brain. He and Luke battle when he accuses Luke of being the lightning thief. Luke fucking says yes right and then STABS HIM after trying to convince Annabeth to pick the right side (his side) and she disarms him but he takes a knife and stabs Percy. He runs away, Percy’s on the ground, Annabeth’s at his side and holding him. She’s giving him emergency ambrosia as he’s dying and he looks like he’s gone but then he comes back. She says Seaweed Brain and he says Wise girl and hugs him to her and SHIT man.

Bring on the Monsters

Percy motivates the camp. Tells them it’s real, shits getting real and they need to get ready. He’s got his sword and his fresh stab wound and he motivates them to get going, all of them sing and then Chris does his beautiful solo thing and stands in front with his sword and they’re all singing in the background. When he maintains his line on the bottom people are passing back and forth around him and touching his shoulder as they pass him and he yells excitedly back next summer at one point. And they all stand together in the back and the spotlight hits him as he says he’ll be back next summer and the guitar ends. damn.

The curtains come up and they’re all there taking bows and I love them. Main points: these boys flexible, they’re all doing kicks and all sorts of shit like that, jumping up and down and dancing as well as singing, I’m very impressed. also Chris plays Percy so well. He’s got all the things that were in my head for Percy for all the quirks and ADHD and UGH I love that. Kristin rocked my fucking world and Jorrel played every character so cleanly and had such great vocals. I love them. I love them all. The end.

If you made it to the end of this fucking long ass post send me an ask or a message bc I’m proud of you and you deserve a reward 

[yfere]

Shipping Calculus! Live Updates from C2E65

Why no one started singing the K-I-S-S-I-N-G tree song during this episode, I have no idea. Thank you to @alarnia and @softazelma for helping with data entry. Masterpost here.

+500 to Liam O’Brien/The Sympathy Vote If anything, the investigative report humanized the man, what with his agonized expressions, the hard choices he’s making, the deals, trying desperately to hold onto his friendships. Sam Riegel seems like a robot in comparison, with very long bits. #VoteWithYourJohnson #LiamForPresident

-100 to Marisha Ray/Trustworthiness as the person in charge of the investigation into Liam O’Brien’s campaign, we expect a certain amount of clearheadedness and integrity, which does not include getting high before giving testimony. Fire her from the case! #VoteWithYourJohnson #LiamForPresident

+23 to Jester/Yasha for an adorkable conversation about Yasha’s hard rock harping career, using the imagination to handle hard feelings together, as all good Jester ships should. The offer to wipe Yasha’s memory again if there’s anything she doesn’t want to know or remember #ThatsLove, and Yasha channeling Jester’s slightly unhinged love of animals and peacemaking by speculating they could offer the udak some scritches to quell its murderous impulses. Yasha quoting Jester only about 500 times a day, worshipping the ground she walks on, believing she has the power to heal the grass, and then placing that grass into her pressed flower book to remember the moment with #ArtisticSolidarity.

+31 to Beau/Yasha, with a few Battle Aftercare Points for Yasha helping up Beau after the fight, and for an even more emotionally charged watch conversation that resulted in a Ljore Drop from Beau. Talking about past loves and betrayals, the “types” that Beau prefers. Yasha appreciating Beau’s lack of judgment, Beau only slightly ineffectively wielding her I’m-Horrible-Too trump card, Yasha saying she’s “seen” Beau “a lot.” Floating the idea that it is actually possible to move on from Zuala’s death. Beau offering to help Yasha dig up the body, because that’s not weird at all, That’s Love. Darlings. Points taken away because the focus of the conversation was almost entirely on other people they love and have loved, and Jester, which brings us to…

+10 to Beau/Yasha/Jester, as in the launch of the second major intra-party poly ship in the shipping calculus lab, we have two wlw who spend a substantial amount of their Lesbian Bonding Time just talking about how beautiful and perfect and incredible Jester Lavorre is. Fuck Caduceus, this Literal Saint walking amongst them can heal grass with her spit and her “radiant glow”. With the same logic, we can expect that her toenails cure poison, her kiss brings you back from the brink of death…Also, Jester lending Verbal Support to Yasha’s physical support after the gloomstalker battle, as Beau wrestles with embarrassment over not having done anything

+10 to Caleb/Fjord/Jester as our second poly ship gains points with Caleb saving both Fjord and Jester from plummeting to their deaths and Fjord taking the chance to thunderstep them both up the tree again!

+17 to Jester/Fjord but as usual, Fjord’s contribution to the Rescue-the-Jester operation looks a lot flashier, so he gets more of the Romance Credit. Not only that, but many points for a competitive tree-climbing adventure straight out of a romance novel where Fjord’s Need To Impress The Love Interest gives him enough adrenaline to actually beat out Jester on athletics, swinging her up safely into the branches like a magical green Tarzan. Fjord (and Beau) being lovingly sketched in Jester’s book so she can remember the moment forever. Excellent Battle Couple vibes in distracting and shooting down gloomstalkers while on the moorbounders, not once but twice. Fjord also made an admirable attempt to Rescue-the-Jester during the first gloomstalker attack, but Caduceus got +6 to Cockblocking for immediately assassinating the charmed gloomstalker before Fjord’s spell did any good. Fjord yelling at Nott for not listening to Jester. Plenty of point loss, however, because Fjord is never going to learn to love Jester’s animals, losing his cool and yelling about what her “fucking animal is doing” STOP, Fjord.

+5 to Jester/Caduceus, for the aforementioned gloomstalker assassination, and being #Blessed alongside Yasha and Fjord, but point loss for Caduceus rolling his eyes at Jester’s well-meaning attempt to spit the grass to life and saying “that’s not how it works,” saying “that’s not how it works” about the scrying despite having never succeeded in doing it himself, and for Jester insisting that the massive tree is an evil “vampire tree,” much to Caduceus’ dismay.

+15 to Caduceus/Arts-n-Crafts for sweetly weaving a sunhat for Yasha while everyone else does dumb shit like nearly getting themselves killed, damaging a holy tree and antagonizing the largest bird of prey in  several miles’ radius. He’ll probably sit through whatever encounter happens next week continuing to weave that hat.

+20 to Sam Riegel/Heatstroke as he responds to Concerns over his sweating and over-warm getup by putting on more layers. I’d expect a President with some more self-preservation in him, but if he offs himself with poor costuming choices at least he’ll be taken out of the running, am I right? #VoteWithYourJohnson #LiamForPresident

+16 to Beau/Jester They also earn many Battle Points, as Jester sends her nastiest Guiding Bolts (according to Sam Riegel, an expression of love) rocketing towards the gloomstalker attacking Beau. Beau instantly thinking of Jester’s skill with art and asking her to copy the map, and Jester adorably sketching Beau as one of her favorite people up in the tree, besides thinking that Beau’s tree climbing skills are Incredibly Impressive, and sneaking alongside her and Fjord to get a better look at the roc nest. Point loss for Beau saying Jester’s map was “garbage” which, even though Beau meant the map itself and not Jester’s skill in copying it, Jester still took personally.

-10 to Caleb/The Mission as he confesses to “losing faith” during watch with Nott, feeling like they’re failing and they don’t know what they’re doing.

+25 to Caduceus/The Mission as despite the Wildmother telling him Things He Did Not Want To Hear during his Communing session, Caduceus gets a massive, massive sign he’s going in the right direction in the form of Melora’s tree, and a detailed vision of all the places he’s expected to go to when he sleeps that night.

+19 to Caduceus/Nature as Caduceus plays around in the dirt, pokes at some interesting moss for several minutes, and gets to hang out, utterly smitten with a massive tree that is the best thing ever look at it.

+4 to Caleb/Fjord as no one listens to Fjord’s desire for a short rest, and even his puppy eyes directed at Jester is not enough to sway them, until Caleb catches on to Fjord’s plight and uses his #ItPaysToBeADamselInDistress power to say he wants a short rest, and shift the party to his favor. Caleb wanting some light to read his now-apparently-waterproof book for the Tiny Hut, and Fjord eagerly offering to cast a spell to make Caleb and everything around him darker. It’s the thought that counts? Point loss for Fjord ignoring Caleb’s advice against antagonizing the chasing gloomstalkers.

-2 to Caleb/Cat-Shaped Creatures as asking Frumpkin-the-Vulture with his razor claws to knead and drape himself on people is not nearly as comforting as actually having a real-life cat do it. However, +10 to Caleb/Vulture Culture for that and for turning himself into a huge bird of prey to cart Nott around.

-5 to Jester/Cat-Shaped Creatures (also -5 to Jester/Pets) as despite attempting to comfort Yarnball after the first gloomstalker fight, Yarnball remains spooked enough to break formation when they encounter them again, at which point Jester channels Alison Hargreeves vibes by lying and using mind control to get the poor thing back in line.

-4 to Fjord/Caduceus as Fjord gets a special, potentially life-saving visit from the Wildmother in his dreams, delivering him for the moment from Uk’otoa….and repays her by fucking up one of her most sacred places on the planet with repeated wood-shattering Thundersteps. Caduceus can’t watch.

-40 to Fjord/Uk’otoa as Uk’otoa now has a schedule of bothering Fjord every one to two weeks. I shudder to think how Uk’otoa is going to react once the Wildmother can’t protect Fjord anymore, now that he’s escaped from their clutches once.

+1 to Fjord/His Inner Bard for motivational rapping of...questionable quality

+3 to Caleb/Caduceus as Caleb very sweetly refuses Caduceus “wasting” his light spells on him, asks him about his feelings towards the tree. Caduceus looking to Caleb before anyone else to see if investigating the turtle shell is a good idea.

+4 to Nott/Jester as Nott offers some excellent advice on how to get ones’ way—ask the same question over and over again until you get the answer you want, and if that fails, do what you want anyway. Jester being the Most Concerned with Nott’s drinking, and alongside Caleb successfully steering her away from a suicidal (though heroically romantic) standoff against the gloomstalkers. Nott helping Jester and the others float safely down, and instinctively trying to save Jester and Fjord during their first fall. Bonding over an appreciation for big square dicks, which would only, and I mean only count for point gains between these two individuals. Point loss for Nott calling Jester “crazy” and saying she’ll scar Luke for life, which is probably just a deflection but a hurtful one. Jester catching Nott after she fails to climb the tree and just barely managing to stop herself from being negative and saying “Good effort!” instead, because Jester can’t help but feel like it’s her job to Be Encouraging.

+30 to Nott/Keeping It Together Maybe as she’s totally fine, she’s just going to drink a lot and nearly kill herself trying to stand off against the gloomstalkers and go stealthing alone in the middle of the night and rip the heart out of her enemies—she’s fine guys. It’s all under control

+2 to Clerics/Loneliness, as both Jester and Caduceus are abandoned to take a watch alone. Even so, their love for the others shines through, with Jester phoning up Kiri, and Caduceus preparing breakfast for everyone.

+1 to Caleb/Jester as Caleb tries to gently defend Jester to Nott, a few different times—a difficult thing, to dissuade Nott of anything!

+25 to Nott the Best Detective Agency/Detective Work and Beau/Nerdom as Beau is the one to find the map of the area to have Jester copy, alongside Nott’s excellent vision catching Melora’s tree at a distance. Then, Nott’s investigation of the tree alone demonstrating Admirable Detective Curiosity, while Beau is the only person to recall exactly what the tree is and its significance to the Wildmother and the Calamity. Jester finding their target running his hands along some mountain in the Prenumbra Range, looking for the correct place to put the emblem that he bought from the scout courier.

+3 to Essik/The Mighty Nein as he is “proud” that they’re hanging out cheerfully in the middle of the Badlands. At this point Essik seems to have just accepted that they’re a dumpster fire and has resolved to pat them on the head so long as they do the bare minimum and keep themselves alive. A few days from now they’ll give him a call from the bottom of the ocean, yes yes that’s very good children, we’re very proud of you here and that’s what I’ll tell anyone who asks because it’s not like I staked any part of my reputation on backing you to the Bright Queen or anything.

[mayve-hems]

Amnesia | Luke Hemmings

Type: IMAGINE | ONE SHOT | MULTI CHAPTER

Summary: After his girlfriend killed herself, Luke is forced to come to terms with her death and her funeral

Word Count: 4.4k

Note: A sad and possibly triggering story. It’s short and not my best work, but I’ve tried my hardest and I hope you’ll leave a like! I’d like to thank my friend Jo for proofreading this story! Also, this is not my gif. 

Warnings: Cussing, mentions and scenes of self-harm, mentions of parental abuse, depressed Luke Hemmings, angst, suicide

Normal

Flashback

-

Luke presses part of the soft pillow to his ear, trying to drown out the thoughts flooding his brain. His head is pounding with thoughts from months ago, imagining her body right next to his. The blood pouring out of the wound, staining sheets, and his clothes. The shirt he wore that night was left at her house, discarded right there when he had to lift her dead body off the mattress. She was light in his arms; weightless like an angel floating in thin air. His blue -for some reason he wore blue that night- jeans are stuffed in the corner of his closet, soaked thick with blood down the front.

"You're an idiot," Y/N giggled, shoving a spoon into his mouth. His top jaw fell onto the metal, freezing his gums with frozen yogurt. "Is it good?" Y/N had the most beautiful smile Luke had ever laid eyes on. Her teeth bit down on her lip when she smiled, bringing her boyfriend's attention to the plump skin. Luke absolutely adored Y/N. She caught his eye in middle school, finally gave him a chance in high school, and had been dating since. Liz Hemmings described the couple as inseparable and loving. Every time Y/N had to go home from Luke's house, he'd walk her the seven-block distance, kissed her under the moonlight, and would walk home while on the phone with her.

Luke nodded his head, confirming what Y/N thought of her favorite frozen yogurt flavor. "Tastes just like you," Luke leaned forward to connect his lips with Y/N's. She tasted the yogurt on his lips, basking in the sweetness mixed with Luke. Her hand grabbed onto the collar of his shirt when he tried to pull away. Just to keep him close for a little while longer. Just a few seconds.

Luke bit into the skin on the back of his hands, suppressing a sob. She was gone so quickly; it took her almost no time to bleed out completely. Too much blood gone, and her heart was dead. There was nothing Luke could do to stop the bleeding. He regrets not opening her door sooner- he regrets waiting for her to say it was okay to go into her room!

"Is it hot in here or is it just you?"

Luke shoved Y/N's shoulder, pushing her into the grass a little bit as he continued down the sidewalk. "I hate you," Luke laughed off.

It's all his fault!

"Are you sure you're not tired? You've been running through my mind all day!"

"I am tired, Hemmings, but it's because it's the middle of the night,"

"Way to ruin it, dork,"

Luke rolled over, suffocating himself in a bedspread and duvet. His bare torso is hot and sweaty, but on the inside, he's frozen and cold, breathing in pieces of ice. He looks at the wall next to the side of his bed- the bed Y/N and he had pressed against the wall just days before her death so they could hang polaroids of them both. They made a heart out of the polaroids right next to Luke's windows, with 'Y/N & LUKE' written right above it. Though there were pictures of Luke with all of his friends too, most were of her. His favorite- a picture of her sitting on him with her head thrown back in laughter, wrapping her right arm around the back of his neck. She was smiling- cackling with laughter from a stupid pickup line. Ashton took it on Christmas. Luke remembered only because of her brand-new skinny jeans; she had gotten them that morning and tore them the same night. He wants to rip it off the wall, into pieces, and set every last bit on fire.

The only reason he didn't is that they're all he has left of her.

"What do you call a cheese you can't have- Wait!" Luke let go of Y/N's hand and turned to face her. She was buried in his favorite hoodie, letting it reach to her thighs. Luke just stared at her for a moment, forgetting his joke. He admired her: messy hair, ripped skinny jeans, combat boots, and his hoodie. He couldn't imagine an outfit that would make her look better. "What . . ." Luke shook his head, trying to resurrect the memory of the joke. "What's the cheese that you can't have?"

Y/N smiled that smile where her eyes would close. The smile that proved just how in love with Luke Hemmings she is. "What, Homo?"

"Nacho Cheese!"

Y/N tucked her face into her hands, laughing from idiocy, hilarity, and how excited Luke was to get it right. Luke pulled her hands away from her face, forcing her close to him. They kissed before continuing their walk around town. "You're stupid."

"Yeah."

Luke covered his head with the duvet. His mum taught him that if you're under a blanket for too long, you can suffocate. No new airflow- only carbon dioxide. He hopes he'll suffocate with her memory sitting on the tip of his tongue.

"Luke?" a voice came from behind his bedroom door. Somebody rasped their knuckles against the wood. "I know you're awake." Luke didn't dare make a sound or move. He wanted to be left alone without anybody bothering him. "Get up or I'm coming in." No reply. Calum shoved his way into Luke's room. He pinched his nose immediately. "Gross! You stink. When was the last time you showered?"

He showered the blood off his skin and from under his nails the morning that Y/N was pronounced dead. The sun was barely up, and he was mourning the death of his long-time girlfriend during a sobfest under cold water. Since that day, he has drunk a bottle of water in total and gone to the bathroom. "Get out." Luke's voice was raspy from dehydration and lack of speaking.

"Take a shower."

"I said get out!" Luke screamed. He clutched a pillow from his floor and shot it towards Calum as hard as he could. He hasn't eaten in a week; he has no strength to get the pillow hurled painfully at his friend.

"Take a shower," Calum said in a calm tone. He wanted to reason with his younger friend rather than anger him again. "Eat what your mom made you," Calum stared at the snacks Liz had brought to Luke over the past few days. She'll step into his room while he's sleeping and place something fulfilling on his nightstand and pray that he consumed it. "Her funeral is today. You have to go."

"You don't think I know that!"

"Luke," Calum whispered. "I know it's hard, but-"

"-But what, Calum?" Luke was on the verge of crying. Calum had only seen his best friend like that a few times in his life. "She's dead. The love of my life is dead because of me!"

"Luke," Calum whispered. The room was filled with emotion nipping at Calum's seams. Luke's feelings tore at Calum's nerves, feasting and shredding them until he was practically crying along with his friend. Calum swallowed hard. The older of the two restrained all of his feelings. "Please just get up and eat something. We're all worried about you."

Luke slid over in his bed a little bit. Calum sat down on Luke's grey sheets and opened his arm. Calum and Luke don't show emotion that much, though everyone has a breaking point. Luke drifts into Calum's body, shoving his head into Calum's chest. The olders arm falls and pats the younger body. "It's all my fault!" Luke violently sobs. He's soaking his friends' white shirt, but Calum doesn't mind.

When Luke first laid eyes on Y/N he had to do everything in his power to learn her name. His hand shot up in the middle of Mrs. Montgomery's math class, asking for the new girl to be his partner. Y/N smiled and nodded her head to the teacher, confirming that she wanted to be with Luke.

In her leather jacket and skinny jeans, she sat down right next to Luke. She moved a braid over her shoulder and leaned in really close. Luke could smell mint on her breath. "What's your name?"

"Luke," Y/N smiled at him. "What's yours?"

"Y/N!"

"That's really your name?"

"Yeah," Y/N snickered. "My parents were a little weird."

"There's nothing wrong with weird."

"It's not your fault Luke," Calum whispered. He continued patting the emotional seventeen-year-old. "It's none of our faults. You didn't know-"

"-Calum shut up," Luke whispered. He pulled away from Calum's shirt, feeling bad about leaving a trail of tear marks on the right breast. "You don't understand. I loved her so much, and it's all my fault."

Calum met Y/N before she met Luke. Calum thought Y/N was gorgeous too, but she liked Luke more than Calum. Her death had a huge impact on Calum, one of her best friends, along with Ashton Irwin and Michael Clifford. Luke didn't know that Calum had been in love with Y/N since they were young too. He wouldn't ever tell him that either.

"What if we pushed our Minecraft beds together," Luke whispered from behind Y/N as she stirred a pot of pasta. He wrapped his arms around her fragile body, resting his hands on her ribs. She laid her head against his on her shoulder. "Just kidding . . . . unless?"

"You're stupid," Y/N rolled her eyes. She tapped the wooden spoon on the edge of the black pot before setting it down on the counter. Her body flipped around to face her boyfriend. "But we should. I want a bigger bed to sleep on. I'll make you sleep on the ground." Y/N kissed Luke.

"That's not what I meant, Y/N,"

Y/N smirked and got on her tippy-toes to kiss Luke again. "I know."

Calum convinced Luke into getting out of his room. Liz almost fainted seeing her son walking through her house shirtless and without complaining. Luke stared at the ground as his feet shuffled further and further against the carpet. Liz perked up when her youngest son caught her eyes, but Calum's face told her that he was only out of his room by force.

"I'm gonna' go take a shower," Luke muttered, shoving back his greasy hair. He made his way into the cold bathroom and closed the door behind him. He didn't even turn on the light; he let the window in the shower illuminate the small room. He shoved his pants to the cold ground and stared at his dark reflection in the mirror.

Dirt stuck under his fingernails pretending to be black French tips. His nails would be longer, but he chews them off in his sleep when he remembers what she looks like. In the daytime, he gnaws on his raw fingers without realizing what he's doing. Luke's belly caves in on his ribs; his legs seemed to be a shade dark with dirt; his hands feel weak and bloodless.

"You have such a babyface,"

"Fuck off, Y/N,"

"You do!"

Luke brushes his hand over his rough face, feeling the facial hair just barely growing.

"I'll grow a beard just for you!"

"You could be growing that until the day I die and it still won't show up!"

"Try me, Y/N!"

He flipped around and punched the wall behind him. A dent doesn't form from his fist but red marks form on his knuckles. How could he just let her go like that? He continues punching until somebody knocks on the bathroom door. Luke halts his actions, feeling tears roll down his cheeks.

"I'm fine," he tells whoever is behind the door. "I'm perfectly fine."

-

Returning to his room, Luke feels weak and like he's on the verge of collapsing. He closes his door behind him and falls onto his freshly-made bed. It smells like laundry detergent and Y/N's favorite perfume. The smells seem to be mixed in a blanket Liz picked from his closet and threw onto her sons' clean bed. Luke sat in the shower long enough for Liz to tidy up his room- he's forever grateful that she did that for him. Though, he feels terrible that she's the one that had to clean.

"I'm cold," Y/N giggles. Her hair tickles the underneath of Luke's child when she snuggles even closer to him. "Why do you keep it two degrees in here?"

Luke breaks his concentration of Deadpool playing on his flatscreen. His sparkly eyes look around the room to search for a blanket. He tucked in his duvet and bedsheets when Y/N said she was coming over to watch a movie, and he didn't want to mess it up. He reached for the blanket just under his bed and laid it over his girlfriends' small shoulders. "I like the cold,"

Luke does like the cold, but when Y/N said she was on her period, Luke looked up different things to help. They had snacks laid out in front of them: chocolate, chips, doughnuts, fruit, pizza, leftover pasta, and nachos that Y/N said she was craving. Something told him that your body temperature goes up, so he turned the thermostat down and put joggers and a hoodie on. He'll give the hoodie to Y/N when she's almost asleep so she has something to clutch onto.

He never got that hoodie back. The blanket, though, now sits on his bed, covering the mattress. Luke can't cry though; he's cried so much in the past few hours all he wants to do is fall asleep. He resists the urge, though, when he sees the outfit Liz picked out for him on his bed.

He thinks of himself as a little kid- mommy had to pick out his outfit. He can't bring himself to make fun of it though. He just isn't feeling like it. He dresses in the black button-down and black slacks and attaches the dark grey suspenders to the front of his pants, then the back. It's not his style, but it's what Liz chose for the funeral. It still boggles his mind that he’s attending Y/N's funeral.

"What are the six elements of art?" Luke asked Y/N, resting his chin on the top of her head. His hand dipped into the purple bath water to wrap his arm around the front of her body. Y/N had a huge art final in the morning, but needed relaxation and to review. Luke's first plan was to take a dip into the ocean. The chilly air prohibited them from even thinking of resting their toes in the water under the moonlight. Luke drew a scorching bath and threw in essential oils he knows Y/N favors and the only bath bomb that he could find underneath the sink; she rested in his arms, on the verge of sleep.

Y/N thought about her answer. "Color, form, shape, space, texture, and-" her brain was buffering, forgetting the last element she had to study. She turned her body so her shoulder was up against Luke's chest, their legs still tangled into a mess on the bottom of the porcelain tub. " . . . uh?"

"Y/N, you know this,"

She looked up at her gorgeous boyfriend through her eyelashes, clinging onto the memory of Art I. She ran a wet hand through his quiff, dampening the strands of hair down to his head. "Your hair is so soft." He laughed, but still pressed further for the answer. "Line?"

Luke leaned his head down to press his lips to hers. "Correct."

Luke stares at his hands while he sits at the breakfast table. Calum and Ashton shove a jar of jelly between the two of them. Calum sets the jar on Luke's untouched plate. Luke stares inside at the fruit-flavored gelatin without responding. The glass canister is almost empty with a full serving left at the bottom. It clings to the sides with a spoon mark on the bottom where somebody just shoveled it straight out. It's Y/N's favorite flavor- the type he only bought for when she was hungry.

Her voice is screaming at him. "This is all your fault, Hemmings!" She's screaming at the top of her lungs inside of his head- he's ears are the only ones that hear her screaming. Luke's skull throbs while she screams. He can't even hear Liz asking if he's okay. "This is all your fault!" Y/N continues to scream. In an attempt to make her screaming stop, Luke picks the jar from his plate and drops it into the trash can. With a booming sound, the glass breaks into pieces at the bottom of the bag. The screaming continues; she's all he can hear. "You killed me, Luke!"

Liz turns her son away from the trash can. His body jumps in surprise at the feeling of somebody's hands touching him- he's a killer. He doesn't deserve love. Her mouth opens and she speaks, but her voice is absolute silence to Luke. He squints at her. He can barely make out her frame, feeling the world spin on a single point. Luke feels dizzy, about to fall over on top of his mother. Liz barely catches her son and guides him back to his seat. His head falls into his empty plate where the screaming continues.

"We should adopt a dog!"

"You can barely take care of your little brother, Y/N,"

"Yeah but he's an unlovable prick. A dog is different."

Luke tries to telepathically tell his recently-adopted dog to come to jump into his lap. Frank ignores his father's fake telepathic abilities and continues laying underneath the table. Frank's an old pug, abandoned at the animal shelter. Y/N's house didn't want it and the Hemmings did. Frank is a Hemmings no matter what.

"I want to run away,"

"But I'll miss you."

Everybody is a Hemmings.

"But I hate my parents and the way they treat me!"

Luke wraps his arm around Y/N, cuddling his head into her neck. They're constantly cuddling, laying together, kissing, or just holding hands. Luke is affectionate and wants to just show how much he loves his girlfriend.

Including Y/N.

"We only have a few more years. Then we'll be out, living in Paris and enjoying tea and crumpets at the top of the Eiffel Tower,"

"I hate tea."

"Mhm,"

Luke gave her a promise ring over a year ago; a beautiful silver ring with 'HEMMINGS' engraved inside of the band in his handwriting. On the outside was her last name in her kindergarten handwriting. Luke was close with Y/N's parents before her death to the point he'd spend time with her little brother when she was at practice or out with other friends. They would play Fifa, or watch TV, or do something stupid. He was always welcomed there- and her parents expressed such excitement when he asked for Y/N's young handwriting. They thought it was adorable and would probably get her out of the house quicker if she had a high school sweetheart.

"You killed me!" Y/N screamed in Luke's mind.

"I love you, Lu,"

"I hate you, Luke!"

The last thing that Y/N ever said was 'I love you, Lu,' with a kiss seconds before her heart stopped and she continued bleeding out. The images of blood shown in Luke's memory. Both of her arms had been stained red from the non-reversible wounds she inflicted on herself. The goddess-like teenager didn't leave behind a note, didn't tell anybody, didn't even give off a sign that she would follow through with self-inflicted harm. Luke only went to her house against her will because he wanted to calm her down from crying.

"What's your favorite . . . drink?"

"I'm really into water," Luke smirked before dripping his head under the surface of the ocean. His long body dove down and grabbed her ankles. The giraffe lifted her feet from the sand and forced her into the Aussie water. She smashed into his legs after a loud splash.

"Luke!" everybody at the table screamed, catching Luke's attention from Y/N's screaming. His head shot up to stare at everyone. Calum's different shirt; Ashton's perfect hairstyle; Michael's black hair; Andrew's black suit; Liz's fancy dress. They all just stick into his mind and grasp his attention long enough to hear what they're pleading out.

"What are you thinking about?" Michael finally asks.

"It's my fault." Luke chokes out before shoving two pieces of crisp toast into his mouth. Bare toast- without butter or jam. He has to swallow hard through the scratchy feeling of toasted bread falling down his dry throat.

"What's your fault?" inquires Liz.

Luke ignores her. His hands reach for another piece of toast before he stands up and scurries back into the comfort of his bedroom.

-

"Woah, Hemmings," Calum wavered his hand towards Luke to grab the bottle of tequila out of his quivering hands. "Calm down there, man. You'll get alcohol poisoning." 

Luke wanted to tell Calum that was his plan. On an almost-empty stomach, Luke was developing a drunk sense, quickly. From just a few chugs out of a fifth of tequila, his head was starting to feel fuzzy and his thoughts were beginning to blur. He swung his feet back and forth off the ledge of the rock he planted his butt on. He studied the water below; a dark blue color with rocks surrounding the edges of the ravine. "How deep do you think the water is down there?" Luke asked, pointing towards the blue. With Calum distracted, he grabbed the bottle back and took another swig. "Twenty, thirty feet?" 

"No clue," Calum replied before snatching the bottle away from his drinking friend. A bit of it spilled down Luke's face and onto his dress shirt. Payback for Luke soaking through Calum's with tears. "Supposedly if you jump from here you'll be killed instantly. Either that or you'll drown before you get help." 

"Huh," Luke answered. Ashton sat down right next to Luke with another bottle of alcohol. Michael was on the opposite side of Calum, messing around with a game on his phone. All eight of their legs continued dangling down the side gorge, touching their feet to nothing but actual air. "Ash, how deep do you think the water is-"

"-Luke I have no clue," Ashton interrupted. He handed Luke his personal bottle and let the golden blond chug until he could no longer swallow. It didn't take that long. The elder took the bottle back and let the younger lay drunk head on his shoulder. "Are you okay?" 

"Not a single bit," Luke whispered. He thought he could hear the sounds of water hitting the rocks. "My girlfriend killed herself and it's all my fault." This was the place they'd always get drunk; Y/N, Ashton, Michael, Luke, and Calum would sit right here on this exact rock and drink until they couldn't walk. Michael hates tequila, so they'd always choose him as a designated driver after they'd all be wasted. "I wish I could wake up with amnesia." 

"Why?" 

"To forget everything," Luke shrugged. He didn't want to remember a single memory. Not a single thing, but every little sliver of the gorgeous girl was running through his brain on a slide show. "Like the way it felt to fall asleep next to her or-" Luke swallowed the memory on his tongue. "I can't escape the memories, Ash." 

"None of us can, Lu," Ashton replied. He didn't mean it in a hard, Get Over It, way, but it slipped out of his mouth. Luke must have not taken it that way because he continued staring at the sunset. "You're never around anymore. We miss you." 

"No, you don't." Luke took the bottle away from Ashton for another chug, trying to kill the hardest memory. "If I woke up with her right beside me like this was just . . . a twisted dream," Luke pressed the lip of the bottle to his mouth and began drinking again. He broke the seal on his mouth when his eyes began watering. Luke pressed the bottle into Ashton's chest. "I'd hold her so close and she would never slip away."

"Luke," Michael called out. Luke shot a look at his black-hared friend wearing a backward snapback. Michael's eyes connected with Luke's. "It's going to be okay. You'll be able to get over this." 

Luke laughed. "No, I won't," 

"Y/N?" Luke knocked on Y/N's door for the fourth time in a minute. She didn't answer, just like the three times before. She let out a strangled cough and another cry. "You called me crying. I . . . I brought you some flowers, and my hoodie, and-" Luke looked down at his hoodie. He dropped the flowers to the floor so he could peel the sweatshirt off his body. It's her favorite one. "Please," Luke groaned before knocking again. She didn't cough, or cry, or do anything. That's not right. 

"She called me before she slit her wrist," Luke looked out to the sunset. "She called me!" He screamed with all his might. The alcohol was wearing off. "And I waited outside of her bedroom door to be let in, while she was dying." 

"Y/N?" Luke knocked again. Y/N made no sounds. That's not like her. He pushed open the door to see the worst scene right in front of him. She was laying on her unmade bed with blood pouring out of her skin, surrounding her body in a puddle. Luke dropped everything in his hands to grab her body. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and tore the blanket away from the wall to soak up blood and press into her wounds. Her mouth made a stinging noise as he screamed to the emergency operator. 

"I waited to go into her room, and I killed her." 

"She didn't kill herself because of you!" Calum yelled. "It's not your fault, Luke! Her parents made her feel bad and-" 

"She called me to talk and I said that I was busy!" Luke screamed with such emotion Michael felt it. "As I said I would come over, she ended the call. So it's my fucking fault, Calum!" 

"She killed herself because of her parents," Ashton whispered. "Not because you couldn't talk. They proved that while you were on the phone she was already bleeding out." 

"I could have saved her!" 

Y/N died in Luke's arms right after pressing a cold, bloody kiss to his lips. He tasted metallic and in the next moment, she was limp. 

Luke stood up from the rock formation. He was teetering dangerously close to the edge. "I just wish . . . " Luke swallowed. 

"Luke, step ba-" 

"-I just wish that I could wake up with amnesia." 

"Luke!" Ashton called out. "Step back from the ledge before you get hurt!" 

Luke turned towards his friends. Ashton's hands reached for Luke, but the younger boy batted his hands away. Calum and Micahel tried to reach for Luke's arm, but Luke shoved everything stretching towards him away. He didn't want to be caught; he didn't need somebody to hold him. "I wish that I could wake up with amnesia and forget everything." Luke's heals were barely on the Earth anymore. He stretched his arms out beside him as if he were balancing on a beam. His eyes shut. He friends reached for body parts to grab and clothing to catch, but it was too late. He was already falling into the water.

-

Request here

[burncrashbromance]

Beautiful Sinner - l.h.

Words: 2k

Warnings: smut.... in church

Note: Thank you to @moonchildsblack and @uncrownedqueeen for coming up with this concept in the first place and to @ashtonandcalslefthand for helping me out and coming up with the title! 💛

This is the game you two play.

Every week, you and your family attend church, just like many other families in your town. Every week, you put on a white dress that goes to your knees, sensible heels that don’t hurt your feet too much and you put effort into making your hair look nice. Every week, before service, you greet the people in your parish one by one, stopping longer with people you know a little better, making sure to be polite. Every week, the Hemmings family stands there too, graciously shaking hands with parishioners. They’re the pastor’s family, their youngest son Luke always the perfect example of a virtuous young man: dressed in a white shirt and black slacks, his golden curls lit up beautifully by the light coming through the church windows. He’s a great student, his character is impeccable and his smile has melted many a heart.

When he smiles at you though, your heart beats out of your chest.

See, the dress you’re wearing is the one you know drives Luke wild because it flows nicely when you walk. The heels don’t make too much noise on the beautifully tiled church floor. And your hair? Perfectly tuggable.

You approach Luke’s parents and catch his eye. He smiles at you and you clutch your bible a little closer to your chest because it is the only object you’re holding. Without meaning to, you’ve made a smirk appear on Luke’s face; one which he’s trying his hardest to cloak by pretending to put a curl behind his ear. He knows full well what kind of effect he has on you. You shake the hands of his father, his mother, his two older brothers. Then you’re in front of Luke, holding out your hand for him to take. He smiles at you again, not saying a single word, taking your hand softly in his own, giving it a small shake before releasing again. You wonder if you’re the only one who feels this hot.

“Shall we?” He asks, and you nod, looking at your and his parents politely as you walk off. You and Luke are volunteers in your parish to set the candles and flowers on the altar, so you always go to a side room before service to get the items and place them where they need to be. Luke’s on your heels as you walk, not quite touching you, lest he loses his good boy character. The moment the door of the room closes, though, his mask drops.

“You look good today, princess.” He says, grabbing your wrist to spin you around. He hums in approval as the skirt of the dress flows up, revealing your thighs.

“Gonna be good for me?” He asks, making you nod instantly. He presses you against the table that holds the flower pieces, intricate bouquets of colourful flowers to adorn the church. Without ceremony he starts kissing your neck, careful not to leave marks. You hold in your moan until his hand pushes your dress up with ease and finds your clit, thumb rubbing circles over your underwear as you clutch his shoulders. You push your face into his neck and let out a low moan, the vibration setting of a groan from him as well.

“Shh, quiet. Can’t be caught, right?” He says, panting a little. You start moving your hips in tune with his fingers until he hisses and pulls away.

“So needy, baby. Gonna make you wait for it.”

“Luke…” You start to say, but he nods his head and pushes himself against you.

“I want you to beg for it, princess. You’re so pretty when you do that.” He winks and lets go, taking some candles into his large hands as you try to catch your breath. You want to glare at him but you know you’ll pay for it later, so instead you straighten out your dress and pick up the flowers.

“You’re such a tease.” You say, making him laugh. He enjoys this game of yours.

“Coming?” He asks before opening the door. You make sure he’s turned around again before you roll your eyes.

The service is nice, you guess, but the only thing you can think of is Luke’s hands. You dare to look at him from the corner of your eye at certain moments, and one time he catches you at it and he shakes his head ever so slightly, making a blush creep up your neck as you turn around again. You shift in your seat, uncomfortable not only because your legs stick to the plastic, but also because you’re itching to be touched.

When time comes for the communion, Luke somehow appears right behind you and startles you as he says: “Good sermon, huh?” You look over your shoulder.

“Yes… Very… interesting.” You lie, not having a clue what the sermon was even about.

Luke moves his hand and ‘accidentally’ grazes your butt, his fingers stroking deliciously against the thin fabric of your dress.

“Excuse me.” He says, and you shake your head, shifting the weight from one heel to another and pushing your butt out a little, bumping into his crotch.

“Oh, sorry!” You say quietly, looking at him over your shoulder with wide eyes. He can’t act out what he feels, so instead he smiles sweetly and shrugs. He manages to resist touching you and you sit back down after you’ve received the wafer. As Luke passes your row of chairs he glances at you quickly. The look on his face makes you weak in the knees.

The moment the pastor ends the service, the butterflies in your stomach are about to burst out. One thing about yours and Luke’s task is that you are the last people in church, making sure to clean up and put everything away. Your parents leave you alone to exit the church and talk more outside, just as everyone else. You wait for the parishioners to leave and find Luke standing at the door of the side room, looking at you with a gaze so intense it could burn. When you approach him, though, he tells you there are some things left at the far end of the church that need to be picked up so you nod and go there, not understanding where Luke’s sense of duty has suddenly come from. It wouldn’t be the first time you’d leave some things behind because you got too caught up.

Luke’s footfalls approach behind you as you spin around.

“Hey, there’s nothing-” You start to say, but Luke crashes into you with a kiss so powerful you threaten to topple backwards, but he catches you in the small of your back and pushes you to walk backwards, until your back hits the dark wooden panels of the confessional. Your breath hitches as you realise what he intends to do.

“Luke…” You whisper, taking a moment to catch your breath.

“You look so hot.” He says. He pushes you into the confessional until you’re both inside, the semi darkness around you adding another dimension.

“I saw you squirm.” He starts pushing up your dress again, slowly, so slow it makes you whine. He squeezes your thighs at the sound.

“Gonna be noisy? Gonna tell me what you want?” He asks. Your dress is now around your waist, Luke’s hands resting there, doing nothing of the kind of touching you need him to.

You pull him into you by the belt loops of his slacks, sighing as you feel the friction of his bulge against your core. He tssks but doesn’t move, relishing in the feeling.

“See what you do to me?” He pushes into you more, both groaning out at the contact.

“Feels good.” You say, and he snaps his head up.

“What, princess?” He asks coyly.

“C’mon…” You say. You throw your head back against the wood and he starts kissing you again, kissing down to the neckline of your dress which is annoyingly high for his taste.

“Tell me.” Another nibble at your neck.

“Tell me what you want.” Your hands find the back of his neck and tug on the hair at the nape, making him thrust into you instinctively.

“Fuck me.” You get out, and you move your hand down to his slacks to palm him through the fabric, earning another low groan. He pushes your panties to the side to touch you and moans at the wetness he finds.

“So wet for me, baby. You’re desperate for it, aren’t you?” He undoes the clasp of his slacks and you pull your hand away, waiting for him to put on the condom you know he keeps in his back pocket.

Without effort he takes you into his arms and you almost straddle him. He takes his time to line himself up and pushes into you slowly, earning a moan as you adjust to him, grasping his shoulders for support. Wordlessly, he bottoms out and takes a moment to rest his forehead against your shoulder, letting out a long breath.

“Was watching you during service,” he says as he starts to thrust, “looking so decent. Such a perfect girl.” He snaps his hips into yours and you almost cry out.

“Couldn’t stop thinking about how you feel around me, your pretty moans in my ears.” He kisses you surprisingly softly as he picks up the pace of his thrusts, his tongue smoothing over your lips. You grasp his curls and tug slightly, opening your mouth to let him in. You find a rhythm together, you still being propped up in Luke’s strong arms, your core starting to tighten every time he thrusts up into you in just the right way. The added risk of being caught makes this all even better.

“‘m Close.” You grit out, losing yourself in the feeling he’s giving you. HIs thrusts pick up now, his hips snapping into yours unceremoniously as he loses his restraint and fucks you properly.

His name starts leaving your lips as a whine until they’re like a prayer. Every second brings you closer to the edge. Your heart hammers in your chest.

“Princess, gonna cum for me?” Luke says in your ear, thrusting in deeper than he was before and it sends you over the edge with a scream loud enough to startle both of you. Luke chases his own high and curses as he comes, leaning his forehead against yours as he rides it out.

You look at each other, panting in the small space of the confessional. After a minute, Luke slides out. You start giggling as it hits you what you just did and Luke starts right back as he takes your face in his hands and kisses you.

“That was... “ He starts.

“So good.” You finish his sentence. All the tease and sass has left him now, just a giddy Luke left. His smile is warm and open, his curls tousled. You can’t figure out which Luke you like more. Both bring excellent gifts to the table. 

“Always wanted to fuck you in this thing.” He confesses, and the irony isn’t lost on either of you.

“Got your wish.” You say coyly. You try to smooth out the fabric of your dress and Luke tries his best to fix your hair, pecking you on the lips at intervals.

“How about we clean up and pretend we’re the goody two shoes we’re not?”

“Good idea. Although I’m feeling like a round two on that table.” You say as you step out of the confessional and walk towards the side room, saying it so casually that Luke does a double take.

He doesn’t waste a second to catch up to you.

[Tag list]

@lostincalum @irwinkitten @calumspeachy @uncrownedqueeen @drunk-amnesia @moonchildsblack @colourfulcalum @thunderlightcth @lashtoncurls @lashtondaddies @myloverboyash @5-secondsofcolor @ashtoniwir @lockthisheartinchains @asht0ns-world @bloodmoonashton @harrysgucciclothes @ashtonandcalslefthand @roselukes @babylon-corgis

[grimelords]

Hello I’ve finished my February playlist for you. There’s no timeline on these things anymore they just come out whenever they come out it seems. A good mix, and I’m sure there’ll be at least one thing in here you’ve never heard before that you’ll like. 

Doncamatic (feat. Daley) - Gorillaz: This song is extremely traumatic for me because they released it after Plastic Beach as a standalone single and Damon Albarn said they had a whole other album worth of songs from the Plastic Beach sessions that they were thinking about releasing with Doncamatic as the lead single that just never materialised, and the idea of Plastic Beach 2 sitting on a hard drive while we get The Now Now (The Fall 2) instead is maddening.

Portait Of A Man (live) - Marlon Williams: I feel like I've used The Secret to bring this album into existence. It's exactly what I wanted from him - no studio artifice or weird genre pigeonholing and his huge voice on full display. It's incredible and long as hell and this is definitely the highlight.

Houdini Crush - Buke & Gase: I'm in love with the structure of this song. It takes SO long to get back to the chorus. It takes about three different sections in the middle and then finally gets back there and it's so satisfying because of it. You could edit this song into a tight indie pop piece but instead it has the space to go wild and jam and it's great.

AE_LIVE_KRAKOW_200914 - Autechre: Sorry but Autechre finally put all their live albums on spotify and they're very VERY good. Not the sort of thing that you want to listen to as part of a playlist exactly cause they go for an hour each but a very nice reminder nonetheless.

Sheet Metal Girl - Pig Destroyer: I think Pig Destroyer is one of the best band names I've ever heard. I found out later they meant pigs like cops which is still good but the idea of absolutely eviscerating a hog for no reason is very palpably metal. Just looked up the lyrics and this song seems to literally about having sex with a girl made out of sheet metal. Good!

Horizon - Aldous Harding: I absolutely love this song and the way she says 'babe' lights my brain up like a christmas tree. Every now and then I think about when you’ll die baaaaabe.

Born Slippy (Nux) - Underworld: There's a good bit on the Genius page for this song that says "Lots of 1990s acts helped popularize techno, but in Karl Hyde, Underworld had something that was the exclusive province of rock bands: a totally full-of-it frontman who sounded cool." and it's interesting that Underworld and The Prodigy are the biggest names to survive that time and still be at least slightly relevant now. No matter how much you put into your instrumentals nothing can really compare to just having an insane guy yell a bunch of garbage over it.

A Change Is Going To Come - Baby Huey & The Baby Sitters: This is like all good all normal and then he does that huge squeal at 2 minutes in and you're rocked to your core and then it only gets bigger and bigger and better from there. Also maybe one of the best mid song monologues I've ever heard.

No Signal (feat. Roy Woods) - 24hrs: The whole thing of emo rap mirroring mid 2000s emo is still so strange because it's not just the mindset and content being repurposed it's the literal melodic conventions. Change the instrumentation of this song and it's melodically just an emo song. Very strange, but this song is great regardless.

De Aqui No Sales - Cap.4: Disputa - Rosalia: Rosalia rocks and I only just found out El Guincho co-produced this album which is very exciting to me. I love the way this song feels like it never really gets to the big build up it's promising. It has a big intro for about half the song and then when it feels like it's about to blow up when the handclaps come in it just sits in that groove for a while and ends. I also feel like I should mention the video for this song because it's like the platonic ideal of a music video. It's got everything you could ask for. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AvGt2BcDl_g

Glass Jar - Gang Gang Dance: Here's how good brains are: I had a sudden urge to listen to this album the other day but couldn't remember what it was called or who it was by, only the album cover, but for some reason locked away in my brain was the fact that it was from 2011 so I just looked through Pitchfork's Best Of 2011 list until I recognised it. Incredible. Anyway I'm so glad I did because I ended up having a huge phase with this album. They walk the fine line of psychedelic jammy bands like this of taking up a lot of space with atmospherics but it never feeling like it's lost momentum. Even when this song takes fully half of its 11 minute runtime to properly get started it never feels like wasted time somehow, it's always moving somewhere.

Heavyweight - Infected Mushroom: It's unbelievable that this song's good because it absolutely shouldn't be. The unholy mix of goa trance and metal usually reserved for Command And Conquer soundtracks is so unbelievably naff that it's come all the way around again and I absolutely love it.

Black Static - Health: I'm still absolutely furious about Pitchfork giving this album a 3 and not particularly for the score but because it's some of the worst Pitchfork Writing I've seen in a quite a while. They tried to cancel them for calling the album Slaves Of Fear I think: "The “we,” it seems, refers to the slaves, the slaves of fear, and if I try any harder to connect the dual sensation of edginess and laziness with slavery, the all-American institution that killed and brutalized millions of people for hundreds of years, I am going to have to take a long walk into the sun." Not sure about that. Anyway this song's great sorry for talking about a review instead of the song!

Burn Bridges - The Grates: Twee pop is an underrated genre and The Grates are an underrated band because they brought so much attitude and power to it it's hardly twee at all. It's huge and it rocks!

Girlfriend (feat. Lil Mama) - Dr. Luke Mix - Avril Lavigne: Sorry for putting Dr Luke on your dash in 2019 but this is mostly for Lil Mama. Removing Avril's verses and replacing them with Lil Mama but keeping the chorus and big guitars makes it sound like a lost Girl Talk song and it's so, so much better than the original. There's also a good bit in this where she really puts a lot of emphasis on saying 'Jennifer Hudson' and the weird harmony vocals in the background mirror it which I like a lot.

Panic Switch - Silversun Pickups: It seems like Silversun Pickups had no lasting impact beyond being one hit wonders for Lazy Eye which is so strange to me because their first two albums were absolutely solid. This is also a good example of totally nonsense lyrics feeling like they have meaning because the melody it so good.

3 - Seekae: It's very strange now to think that Alex Cameron was in Seekae. But that's not important. What is important is how good this song is. In the extremely narrow genre of Mount Kimbie-ites +Dome really stood out to me as album from guys who really got it. It's extremely catchy music but it still sounds like nothing you've ever heard before which when you think about it sounds like it should be impossible.

Shooting Stars - Bag Raiders: Bag Raiders did a little Song Exploder thing for Triple J about this song a little while ago and pointed out something I'd never noticed before which is that this song has the extremely strange structure of 1 really long verse, breakdown, 1 really long chorus, end. Which is.... completely amazing. And also that this song blew up and charted higher than it ever had before via memes like 6 years after it came out is still bizarre. Remember when it was in the video for Swish Swish by Katy Perry? God I hope they got paid a million dollars for that.

Romantic Rights (Erol Alkan's Love From Below Re-Edit) - Death From Above 1979: Huge fan of this remix that seems to just drop the full song unedited right in the middle. The perfect way to remix an already great song - just make it longer.

Dwa Serduszka - Joanna Kulig: I saw Cold War and subsequently couldn't get this song out of my head. I loved that movie so much but I also extremely agreed when @cyborgbree said the ending was like a Simpsons parody or foreign movies.

Holes - Mercury Rev: This song gives me depression and makes me feel like I'm sorting through old records and merch from my old band that tried really hard but never got anywhere even though I've never even been in a band. That's the power of music!

It's Never Over (Hey Orpheus) - Arcade Fire: Reflektor is a great and underrated album and to this day I am still finding new things to love about it! Namely this song which I've never paid much attention to before but massively jumped out at me last time I listened. It's a 3 note riff but it's absolutely amazing.

Dance Your Life Away - Audiobooks: Huge fan of having the gall to name your band Audiobooks and a huge fan of this song! It sounds like if Life Without Buildings was a dance band, which is a theoretically perfect idea. It sounds like she's just making the words up on the spot and she probably is and it's absolutely great.

Everything (Deathless) - JW Ridley: I'm so glad that War On Drugs brought heartland rock back for the masses and finally gave us back extended guitar solos outside of a metal or prog context. It is so inspiring what you can do with two chords and a propulsive groove.

Unmarked Helicopters - Soul Coughing: Sorry for continually putting Soul Coughing in these playlists but check out how good this song they did for the X Files movie soundtrack was. 'check out this Soul Coughing song they did for the X Files movie soundtrack' is a very specific kind of 90s sentence. Anyway the 'black black black black and blacker' part with the distortion on the vocals is so good, love it lots.

Don't Sit Down Cause I've Moved Your Chair - Arctic Monkeys: I saw Arctic Monkeys a couple of weeks ago and it was amazing but also extra good because they played this song that I'd completely forgotten about and it went off. The Josh Homme produced Arctic Monkeys albums are very good because his fingerprints are all over them and they sound like Queens Of The Stone Age covers.

What Can I Do If The Fire Goes Out? - Gang Of Youths: It's fucked up how good this song is. I listened to it the other day and was like 'what the fuck how come I never listened to Gang Of Youths second album that much? But then I kept going and realised it was 70 minutes long and had about five interlude tracks on it. I love Gang Of Youths but they need a producer that will yell at them until they make a 40 minute album. Fuck this song's good though. So good I'm mad I haven't seen it live yet.

Shark Smile - Big Thief: I don't even know the words to this song or what it's about but it makes me cry anyway. I'm very glad I found out about Big Thief this month, like two years after everyone else. Their description on Bandcamp says "Listening to Big Thief is like the feeling of looking at a dog and suddenly marvelling that it is like you but very not like you; when you are accustomed to looking at a dog and thinking 'dog', watching Big Thief is like forgetting the word 'dog' and looking at that naked animal and getting much closer to it and how different it is to you" which is a certainly a way to feel.

Inhaler - Foals: I don't know how I've avoided it but I've never really gotten much into Foals even though they have multiple songs that I really really love, this one being one of them. I think it's an amazing piece of recording simply for how huge it gets. This song swells to about ten times its original size as the chorus hits before totally deflating again. Also a huge fan of anyone that can make a Battles riff work in a conventional song like this does.

Red Bull & Hennessy - Jenny Lewis: Another fantastic song in the long pantheon of great songs about getting twisted and being horny. The isolated 'ohh' after 'all we've been through' feels like a real Shania Twain piece of production and I love it. Also the drums on this song are absolutely massive for some reason which is very cool.​

listen here

[wroughtbetwixtfanfic]

Love, Blood, And Rhetoric, Ch 1.

Fandom: The Society.

Summary: Campbell's just trying to survive in the new world. He knows he can make it-- it's everyone else he's worried about.

Rating: Mature.

Tags: Canon Divergence, Mental Health Issues, Family Issues, Substance Abuse, Complicated Relationships, Consent Issues, Antisocial Personality Disorder, Homophobic Language, Hurt/Comfort, Minor Character Death, Mild Sexual Content, assuming Elle and Campbell are both 18 for the sake of things, Underage Drinking, PTSD, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, implied eating disorder, Fix-It, Campbell has mild ASPD, and is actively trying to not be awful

Word Count: 6061

Part One, Ch 1 || Ch 2 || Ch 3 || Ch 4 || Ch 5 || AO3

Disclaimer: This is part two of a three part series. Reading part one is more-or-less essential.

This is a canon divergent storyline for Campbell, using (in my experience) a realistic take on conduct disorder and ASPD instead of Hollywood "psychopath" stereotypes. While people with conduct disorder can be violent and abusive, the diagnosis does exist on a spectrum, and neither ASPD nor "psychopathy" should be diagnosed before the age of 18; this is one thing that rubbed me the wrong way on The Society. Campbell's power will be more in his ability to manipulate-- not "being crazy". Hopefully I can succeed in presenting a more understandable and less sensationalized vision of his behavior. Please note that I have no intention of making him a violent abuser, to bring his character more in line with my experiences of how an emotionally neglected teen with moderately reduced empathy would behave, provided they were actively attempting to help themselves.

Tl;dr I just wanted to make Campbell less needlessly shitty, because it makes me feel better as a person, and because I wanted one (1) antagonist who isn't just an evil, horrible abuser with a scary mental illness.

Thank you for reading, and leaving kudos/comments/likes. <3 

///

The bridge was quiet as a graveyard. It was something out of a science fiction movie, wasn't it? Alice in Wonderland type shit. Something happens, and suddenly the world goes inside out, with people transported to some other dimension. No one had said a damn word, but it was the only explanation that made any sense at all. It looked like home, but it wasn't home. Everything felt a few degrees to the side. Just a tiny bit abnormal. Forests that sprouted up around them overnight. Everyone else in the city, gone. The smell, gone. Gordie was the first to break the silence. "I mean, there's only so many options."

"Maybe we're dreaming," Allie offered. "It's the best option." Campbell rolled his eyes, but held his tongue for Cassandra's sake. They would all have to be dreaming the exact same dream at the same time, and that seemed far less likely than some sort of weird wormhole situation. Harry was sitting on his car hood, with Helena and Luke next to him. He ran his hands through his hair; he was still half drunk, and had no business being there, but there he was and he was freaking out. "Maybe this is just some elaborate fucking game. Like, someone built an exact replica of our town and just put it in the middle of nowhere, and if we just walk..." He paused, waving his hands towards the trees. "Like, this way or that way or any way, eventually we'll get back to the real world." Christ, that was an even worse theory. Campbell sighed. "An exact replica of the town," he pressed, "complete with all our family's cars? Our clothes? Our bathroom towels, posters, jewelry, stuffed animals, the food in our fridges?" "I'm not saying it makes any sense." Crossing her arms, Cassandra leaned against the bridge and frowned. She had that debate team look in her eyes. The look that said she was trying to dissect the situation in her mind. "There was a smell, and then it went away. It came back, and the buses came for us." Harry scoffed. "You're gonna just work this out, Cassandra? Like some logic problem? I mean, not a flicker of a doubt?" "The world doesn't just turn upside down without a reason. We're not in some play-within-a-play. Okay? Clever is not the same thing as true. There is a point to everything, there are answers." "That's right," Helena chimed in. "God doesn't just play games with people for fun." Cassandra clenched her jaw as she looked to Helena, then to Campbell. They had both stopped going to church a long time ago, and Cassandra had been the one to get religious-specific plays banned from school performances. Campbell didn't really believe or disbelieve anything, but he knew Cassandra and Helena had gotten into argument before about all sorts of things. LGBT rights, abortion, gun control... He could see that anger stirring up in Cassandra. It wouldn't be pretty if it got loose. Luckily, Luke seemed to sense the tension and butted in. "All right, look, Grizz and I will get a group together and we'll go hike out here through the woods, okay? Like a search party." Helena nodded. "I think that's a good idea." "Do you think it's safe?" Cassandra asked, frowning. "Yeah," Grizz replied, "sure." Luke tried to smile. "Grizz knows what he's doing. And if there's people out there, we gotta find them, right? You know. To get help." "I'm leaving." Harry got up off the car and headed towards the driver's door. His eyes were glassy, distant. It wouldn't be long before he imploded. "I'm hungry." Allie stood up, glaring. "You're leaving?" Campbell watched the bickering that followed, wondering when-- if at all-- they were going to ask his opinion. But he knew they wouldn't. They never did. If they would have shut the fuck up long enough to bother, Campbell would have told them that the horizon looked a little too clean for a West Ham summer. Too clear. He would have pointed out that there were no planes, no trails even, in the sky overhead. Wherever they were, chances were they were alone. Instead, he focused on his phone while everyone started arguing in full; Elle was trying to call. Can't talk now, he texted. At the bridge with Cassie and others. She replied quickly. Why? What's wrong? Not sure. All roads out of town are blocked. Blocked? We can't get out? Has anyone found our parents? Campbell rubbed his face with one hand. No, we can't. No adults or younger kids yet. Trying to figure out what to do. Oh. A long, long pause. Show me. Whatever was happening, Harry was officially done. His tone sharpened, and Campbell looked up to see him trying to collect Kelly. "You coming with, Kel?" He stood there, staring, when she shook her head. Ouch. Harry hadn't mentioned that they were on the rocks; he was being an unreasonable ass, though. Not a surprise. "Jesus christ, just get in the car." "Leave her alone," Will grumbled. "Hey, fuck off, Will." Harry looked to Campbell, seeking someone to follow him. Campbell just raised an eyebrow. Harry seethed, getting into his car and starting the engine. "Fine. Who gives a shit." He knew Harry would be mad at him for a while, but eventually he'd stop being a selfish prick and come around. Campbell needed to be there, to keep an eye on people and the situation; he needed to hear what was happening, and plan accordingly. If Cassandra couldn't keep herself together and all hell was going to break loose, Campbell needed to be ready. In the mean time... Cassandra blinked at him and he moved to her side, lifting his phone to take a picture of the blocked off tracks and road. "What are you doing?" "I'm just gonna send a text. Let everybody know how fucked we are." "Campbell!" she hissed. "Don't. Come on, let's think about this." But there was nothing to think about. Campbell pressed the send button, and his phone dinged in confirmation. He smiled at the look of horror on her face, sitting down on the sidewalk while he waited for Elle to reply; it wasn't often that he actually felt stronger than Cassandra, or even smarter, but it was one of those rare moments that he saw an opportunity and took it. Hiding the truth from people would only backfire. She'd thank him later, if she had the sense. Cassandra was still moaning over it. "Fuck. Why did you do that?" "Relax, Cassandra. I don't have many people on my contact list." "But they'll share it with their friends. It'll spread." "A slow, steady distribution of information is better than pretending things are fine." "Campbell--" "Look." Setting aside his phone, Campbell turned to Cassandra and held her gaze. "You, me, and like a dozen other people already know. How long do you think it'd be before one of them squealed, huh? Someone would let it slip, at some point. And if you go back into town, telling everyone it's all good when it's not, at some point they'll realize you lied. What do you think is gonna happen when three hundred teenagers stop trusting their student body president, Cassandra?" "I'm not student body president anymore. Harry said so, and it's true." "Harry's a shithead." "Then why are you friends with him?" "Not the point. You're one of the smarter people here. Gordie, Bean, Will, Grizz? They're amazing, but you were the closest thing to a leader we had back home. That doesn't just go away." Cassandra chewed on her lip. "I don't want to be a leader. I'm..." She pressed her hand to her chest. "I'm sick. What if I can't get my medicine?" "Tough shit," Campbell retorted. "Power is in your hands, and if you don't get a grip on it, someone else is going to put you in the dirt. All the medicine in the world won't help you if there's a fucking mutiny." "What do I do, then?" "These kids are gonna get scared, and they're either gonna look to you or they're going to challenge you. Pull yourself together." For a long time, Cassandra didn't speak. She sat next to him and gazed woefully at a small group of teens that were heading their way, some walking and others jogging. They were pointing at the road, and some began shouting. A few began to hover closer to her, looking nervous. "Well. Maybe you're right." "Usually am. Now if you'll excuse me, I have an acquaintance to console." Elle had arrived with the group, staring off the side of the bridge at the tracks. Other kids joined her nearby, and Campbell could hear them whisper as he approached. He was telling the truth. What does this mean? How is it possible? He ignored them, leaning against the railing next to Elle; she didn't look at him, but she leaned a little closer. "This is such bullshit," she said after a time. "What are we supposed to do?" Campbell shook his head. "Whatever is happening, if we're stuck with no way out, then we gotta do what you do in any survival situation. Secure resources. Shelter, food, water." "Should head to the store and grab some shit before people all get the same idea." "Probably, yeah." Elle glanced over at him. "You're pretty calm in all this." "Getting panicked or scared just means mistakes get made." He texted her a small list of supplies. "Go to the store. Bottled water. A lot of stuff can be frozen or dried. Get what you can, we'll figure out how to preserve it later." She nodded, turning and heading towards the closest market. Campbell waited for her to be out of earshot, then headed towards Cassandra, who was talking to Will and Sam. Everyone else seemed to have dispersed. They all glanced at him, but kept talking; Will was discussing the food situation, already, and Will specifically mumbled something about dehydrating and canning. Well, at least Will had some clue, then. "I saved a bunch of YouTube videos," he said, looking sheepish. "I always wanted to be a chef, so..." Campbell kept walking. They already were making plans; they didn't need him any, and he should go make sure that Elle was doing alright. He made it a few yards before Sam caught up to him, grabbing his sleeve to get his attention. "Where are you going?" Sam asked. "To get what I can." Campbell sighed at the way Sam's eyebrows knit together. There was no point in wasting time trying to explain, and besides, he had to make sure Sam wasn't gonna starve to death. "Coming?" There were a few different stores and markets in town, and while there was one close by, Campbell knew of a smaller one run by one of those doomsday prepper types. There wasn't as much variety there, but it did have gallon-sized bottled waters and things like powdered eggs. People went to it for camping supplies, but not much else; it wouldn't be the first place most would think to go to. Sam followed him inside, watching at Campbell began to fill a basket full of supplied. At least he didn't try and argue that it was theft or anything. "What are you getting?" "This is for you. A week of water. Jerky, nuts and seeds. Dried eggs. Dried fruit, some other shit. Keep it in the basement until you need it." "Why a week?" "Because if the utilities go and no one comes for us after a week, they're not going to." He didn't mean for the words to come out quite so grim, but it was useless to sugarcoat things any. "Keep using the water at home as long as you can. If it goes off, use this." Campbell grabbed some for himself, and they managed to weasel the baskets home without being seen. Probably because most of the other kids were at home crying or at the bridge by that point, who knew for sure. At least no one approached them. As they put shit away, Campbell made a list in his head of things in stores that would be in high demand. Toilet paper, first aid kits, batteries, medications, alcohol, anything for hygiene. Bleach, matches, lighters. And knowing his peers, condoms. If he got his backpack and headed out again, he could probably snatch a good stock before anyone else thought of it... Sam sunk onto the sofa once they finished. He tilted his head as Campbell got a couple backpacks, and made another list on his phone. "What are you going to do?" "I have some business to take care of." "Harry?" Maybe it was the comment itself, or maybe it was the eyebrow quirk of Sam's eyebrow, or some sort of tone his brother had. Either way, Campbell's mood soured on the spot. "Don't pretend like you know me." "I don't know you. That's what scares me." There was nothing to say to that, in the end. Campbell stormed out of the house, heading towards the pharmacy first. Most of what he wanted would be there, and the chances of anyone else being there already were slim. To his surprise, when he arrived, someone had already been messing with the lock; they hadn't managed to get in, whoever they were. Campbell slipped his lock picking kit from the backpack and made quick work of it. First was anything addictive, then meds that would be important. The pharmacy had a little book behind the counter that explained what everything was, and Campbell swept through as fast as possible to grab asthma medications, birth control pills, anti virals, whatever looked useful. He paused as he examined the shelves, seeing a prescription for Cassandra. Her heart meds. He tossed it into his backpack, and then found the rest of that medication and stole it, too. Harry's home was close by. Campbell headed there, knowing Harry would let him stash shit there until Campbell convinced Sam to get in line. When he knocked, though, no one answered. Sighing, Campbell found the hidden key Harry had made specially for him; the house was quiet when he came inside, with Harry nowhere in sight. He hid the backpacks in the attic first, then went hunting for his friend. "Harry? You were supposed to be here eating." A muffled sound came from the living room. Campbell found Harry laying curled up in a ball on the floor, under a blanket. "Hey, buddy. You don't look so hot." "Leave me alone, Satan," Harry slurred. "Are you high?" "Maybe." Campbell flopped onto the floor next to Harry, lifting up the blanket to peer in at him. "C'mon. Tell me. What'd you take?" "A xanax. From mom's medicine cabinet." A quick trip upstairs, to peek at the dose. Not worrisome, but definitely more than a beginner should take, and enough to knock Harry on his ass for several hours. Campbell went into the kitchen and made a can of soup. Harry's favorite, split pea with ham. He brought it to Harry and sat on the floor again, tempting Harry with it. Eventually, Harry crawled out from under the blanket and took the bowl. "She dumped me." Harry poked at the green mass. "Kelly. We found out her dad was screwing with my mom, and I don't know. She got pissed off at me." "You do stick your foot in your mouth regularly." "I didn't mean to make her mad. Now we're in this fucking nightmare world, and... what am I supposed to do? I can't do this alone." Campbell resisted the urge to gloat. He'd never really liked Kelly, anyways, and the feeling had been mutual. "Look, you two have been having problems for over a week now. This changes nothing." He reached over, snagging the spoon from Harry's hand and loading it up with soup. "Besides. You're not alone. You have me." Harry didn't fight as Campbell fed him the soup. "You know what I mean," he said through a bite. He suddenly stopped, swallowing and sinking his face into his hands. "Maybe you don't. Christ." "You're hung over and high. Eat your soup and we can talk later." He muttered under his breath, but Harry listened anyways. Campbell put on a movie, chilling while Harry ate; when Harry was done, he slumped against Campbell and fell asleep. Well, at least he couldn't panic if he was passed out cold. Hours passed. Harry eventually woke up enough to stumble into the shower and clean himself up, while Campbell made them grilled cheese sandwiches. Harry had just returned when their phones began to buzz. "It's from Cassandra." Campbell slid Harry a sandwich. "She wants us to get to the church as soon as possible." Harry shook his head. "Man, fuck her." "Quiet. She knows what she's doing." "Do you seriously believe that?" "Yeah, I do." Harry didn't say anything, but he tightened his jaw, and Campbell saw something in his eyes that planted another seed of worry. Rebellion. Fucking hell, it was starting already. Campbell headed towards the bathroom while Harry got dressed; it was a quick detour to the bedroom of Harry's parents, where Campbell knew Harry's mother kept a gun. The case wasn't locked. The ammo was right there. Thank fuck Harry never had the inclinations to kill anyone. Campbell made sure it was unloaded, then stuck the gun in his waistband and the ammo in his pocket, before heading back out. Harry was waiting on the porch, and they hopped in his car and made their way to the church. By the time they got there, people were starting to gather, but it was mostly empty still. Cassandra was standing by the water fountain, leaning against the brick wall and taking deep, slow breaths. Harry went on inside without waiting. Campbell hung back, sidling up to Cassandra when no one was paying attention. "I can't do this," she whispered. "I can't." Campbell nudged her shoulder with his own. "It's gonna be okay, somehow. If it makes you feel any better, I knocked over the drug store and stole you a few months worth of your heart meds." "You... What. No, no, nevermind. I don't want to know." "You're welcome. But seriously, just chill out. What are you even talking about?" Cassandra ran her hands through her hair. "Luke texted Helena. Helena texted me. We got ahold of everyone on the buses, but people all keep asking me what's going on. You were right. People are looking to me, and I don't know how to lead them." Campbell shrugged. "We're kids, okay? Most of us aren't used to living in the real world. They're gonna be worried about things like resources and safety. Guide them a bit towards ways to get or keep that, and they'll follow." "But why would they take my word for it? I have maybe five friends, Cam. There's over two hundred people coming, and I don't know how to trust them, or get them to trust me." Trust wasn't something Campbell was familiar with, but he knew no one would trust Cassandra if they saw her as weak. And if Cassandra didn't believe in herself, then weak was exactly how she'd come off. Cassandra had been tempered by her love for her family and friends. It was sweet, it was good, but sweet and good wasn't going to get shit done. The people in their town only understood wealth and power. But it was too late to talk more; dozens of people were heading their way, and Campbell knew better than to be seen lingering around Cassandra too long. He took a seat in the back, far from the Cassandra and her little herd. Sam was there, surrounded by Allie, Becca, Gordie, and Will. His actual, chosen family. Even Harry was up there, and Kelly. He felt a small stab of jealousy, but bit it back as soon as it reared its head. It'd do no good. "You could join them." Campbell glanced up at Elle's voice. She stood in the church aisle, watching him. "No, that wouldn't be a good idea. I don't want to be a public relations nightmare for my cousin." "Stay away from the alcohol, and you'd probably be fine." "Elle..." "No, Campbell, whatever you're about to say just don't bother. The best thing you can do is promise never to do that again, and then keep that promise, okay?" "I can do that." "Are you sure?" "Yeah." Campbell hesitated. He hated making promises, because he knew he could be unreliable and he hated breaking promises just as much, but Elle was worth the effort. "I promise." Crossing her arms, Elle looked down at the floor. "Alright. Well, Kelly invited me to sit with her. I'll let you know if they say anything good." She didn't wait for an answer. Elle peeked back at him as she headed up front; he tried to smile at her, and she didn't really smile back, but it was a start at least. Campbell turned his focus to the crowd in the church and their quiet whispers. Many were scared. A few were angry. Most just seemed confused. As time passed, they became restless. At least, that was until Cassandra stood, and began to speak. She stood in the center of the stairs leading to the podium. "Listen. Hey, listen up." Silence fell over the church. Cassandra continued, her voice shaking at first, but becoming louder and clearer as she carried on. "While we're all here, together, there are some things that we ought to figure out. Before we rip this place apart and maybe... you know, start hurting each other." She paused as quiet murmurs spread through the gathered students. "I don't know what the hell is going on. Maybe Luke will come back with some good news." Elle spoke first, her tone annoyed. "Maybe? Of course he will." "Yeah," Harry agreed. "Why don't we just wait and see, Cassandra?" Cassandra sighed. Her eyes darted to Campbell, for just a split second. "Because I would rather prepare for the worst before the worst happens." "What does that mean? Prepare?" Kelly wondered. "I don't know specifically, but I think it means we agree not to just take things when we want until all the food is gone and we starve." The murmurs turned into a panicked rumble. Campbell winced, but Allie, Clark, and Helena loudly agreed with Cassandra, and that seemed to quell the surge of fear... until Harry opened his goddamn mouth, just as Campbell knew he would. "This is bullshit." Will's back was to Campbell, but he could heard the disbelief in Will's voice. "Jesus, man, what is your problem?" "What are we agreeing to, Cassandra?" Harry turned to Cassandra, ignoring Will completely. Some of the students waiting in the pews began to yell in agreement with Harry. "Which one of us gets to decide who gets what? Your friends?" Becca let out a huff. "It's called democracy." "I'm not a fucking idiot, Becca." That was debatable, Campbell thought, but he kept quiet. At least for the time being, to see how things would play out. At least Cassandra seemed to have a handle on things, for the time being; Harry was getting flustered, especially when Cassandra brought out the coin she'd kept from the play. "How do you want to decide things?" she challenged. "Every person for themselves? Then we're back to where we started. Maybe you want to flip a coin to see who decides? You don't like democracy? How about random fucking chance?" Harry scoffed. "That's--" "Call it, Harry. Call it." "I'm not gonna do that." "Okay, okay. I'll call it for you. You get heads." Cassandra flipped the coin. "Tails. Still think it's unfair? Best two out of three. Oh! Tails." "I... I mean..." Cassandra flipped a third time, but this time, her face fell. "Tails." Harry looked frozen. The church had become so quiet, it was like no one was even breathing. Harry was thinking back to the play, and Campbell knew everyone else was, too. "Do it again." Four more times, Cassandra flipped the coin. Tails, tails, tails, tails. Harry stepped back from Cassandra, eyes wide. "Fuck." For a moment, Cassandra paused. She stared at the coin, and flipped it again; she closed her eyes, her hand over the coin for a long moment before she finally looked. "Heads." She held up the coin, and the crowd let out a long sigh of relief. She turned her attention back to them, lifting her voice once more. "It's all up to us. There's no civilization here, not until we start one. So what are we gonna do? First, I think we have no choice but to share. Share food, share resources." "Houses?" Harry asked. "Maybe." "Fuck you." Allie stood up. "Really? How much electricity do we have? Until it's all used up and everything goes dark? I think 225 people in 200 houses doesn't make sense." 239, but who was counting. "Keep what's ours!" some random fuckhole shouted from the other side of the church. "What is yours?" Cassandra questioned. "Do you have money? Who you gonna pay? The things that you need to live-- food, clothes, the stuff in stores-- no one owns them." Will and Harry erupted at one another over housing, and Campbell sighed, leaning back and closing his eyes. They were snapping and snarling, and the mood in the church was getting tense. Will on one side, arguing for Cassandra's view that there should be rules, organization, a method. Harry on his own side, screaming about how he should get to do whatever he wanted. Campbell understood. Harry was afraid, afraid of losing what was his and the comfy little life he had for himself. The big house and big bed and things were all he really had, in his mind. And well, men in general weren't great with sharing, were they? But Campbell knew history sided with people like Will and Cassandra. Capitalism, mine-mine-mine, greed. It never fared well in situations like the one they were in. No, they needed rules. They needed some sort of system, where everyone had an equal portion of things. And they had such a small, small window of time to get things going and working, before it all fell into chaos. Harry was yelling at Cassandra, getting ready to storm off like the entitled rich boy he was. Great. "I don't have to listen to this. Not anymore." "Harry, this has nothing to do with you," Cassandra snapped. "We need to--" "I don't need to do anything you say, you fucking--" Campbell had been busy loading the gun while the two argued, with the rest of the students starting to stand up and scream back and forth, too. He stood, pointed at the back wall's roof where it wouldn't hurt anyone, and fired a single round. The angry screams turned into screams of panic as everyone hit the floor. Some started crying, but everyone was staring at him, and no one was speaking. "Well..." Campbell took to the center aisle, walking towards his cousin. He had to act fast, before anyone recovered and tried to stop him. "Fuck this. Harry's right." Cassandra's mouth dropped open. "What?" "No one elected you king, cousin. Did anybody vote for her? Did they?" Campbell stopped in front of Cassandra and gestured to the cowering teenagers on the floor. "Anybody elect her to speak on your behalf? No?" "I... I don't want to be king." Campbell stared hard at Cassandra. She was stuttering. Oh, it wouldn't do at all for her to look like this in front of the people she was trying to rally. He cocked the gun again, but this time, he pointed it at Cassandra. There was no bullet left in the gun, but she didn't know that. No one did. "That's not what it looks like. Is it?" Allie jumped in front of her sister, glaring daggers at Campbell, but Cassandra gently brushed her aside. Something flickered to life in her eyes. Something courageous. Self-sacrificing. "I've thought a lot about dying. I've almost gotten used to that. But I don't like to be afraid." Cassandra looked down the barrel, then met Campbell's gaze. If she had any idea of the hand he was playing, she didn't give it away. She simply stood tall, steeling her voice and not flinching a bit. "Do you want chaos? Fucking shoot me." And there she was, the Cassandra he loved. Campbell chuckled, lowering the gun and giving her a little smile. "I don't want to shoot you. I wanted to get everybody's attention." Just one last part of the plan to put into place. "This meeting's obviously over. We'll be back when Luke gets here. Until then, if anybody else is tired of listening to her, you can follow me." Campbell turned and headed towards the door, knowing Cassandra would be watching and counting each and every person who left with him. She would know their names. Their faces. She would know exactly who was siding against her. Once he got to the exit, he glanced behind him. It was a good sign. Harry and Kelly. Seven others, of various genders. A tiny, tiny minority, and no threat to Cassandra at all. She would be safe. But then the church doors swung open with a bang, and Campbell fell back. Everyone did. Luke walked in, flanked by Grizz, Bean, Gwen, and the others that had gone out into the forest. In Luke's arms draped Emily's pale, limp body. Gasps and noises of despair rippled through the crowd, and everyone parted to allow Luke access to the table at the front of the room. Grizz cleared the table, and they all stood around, staring. Some started to cry. Some tried to check for her pulse. She was dead. It was clear the minute Luke came in. Campbell had never really known Emily, so he stayed near the door, letting everyone else have a chance to see her for themselves. Closure or whatever. "She died from a snakebite," Luke called out. "Her whole body just shut down. We did everything we could, but we couldn't save her." Grizz spoke when Luke sank to the floor. His voice was flat, cold. Practical. "So we're gonna bury her tomorrow, before it starts to smell. I'm gonna need a couple of guys..." "There's nothing out there, guys. Just a whole bunch of just... woods that go on forever. We're all alone. This isn't our home." This isn't our home. Those four words were all it took to shift everything. He looked to Sam, his thoughts already spinning. His little brother was huddled with Allie, Cassandra, and Becca, and Campbell could practically smell the fear on him. Alone. Sam didn't trust Campbell, and now they had to be alone together? They had to try and survive together? It wasn't going to work, not like this, especially when-- not if, but when-- things started getting cutthroat. Campbell was too bitter, too hateful, and he knew he wouldn't be able to handle the stress of worrying about them both. Especially if Cassandra expected people to start sharing houses. There was no way Campbell could do it. He would hurt someone, at some point. In the end, it was for Sam's own good. Campbell knew he, at some point, would snap. He would destroy Sam. He wouldn't want to, or even mean to. But if they were on their own, trapped, it'd be like too many rats in too small a cage. They'd turn on each other someday, and Campbell knew he would always save himself, without hesitation. Sam deserved better than that. So... Campbell eyed Cassandra and Allie as they walked past, heading to their home. They had already opened their home to Will. Safety in numbers, right? And Cassandra loved Sam. Allie was protective of her family. Sam trusted and loved them, too. They could keep him safe. They would take care of him, and sacrifice their own needs for him if it came down to it. They could be the home Sam needed, even if it was just for a little while. Campbell just had to hope that Sam was angry enough inside, hurt enough by years of distrust and backbiting between them, that he'd be happy to leave. He grabbed Sam's arm as Sam followed after their cousins. Campbell kept his face calm, his voice neutral. Maybe it would be simple. No need to get nasty about it, if Sam would go willingly. "Hey. Don't come home tonight." Sam tensed. There was hurt in his eyes, and the smallest glint of stubbornness. He was angry, but not angry enough. Not yet. "It's my house, too." Campbell studied Sam's face, choosing to dig a little deeper. Something more painful was going to be needed, obviously. "Ever since you were born, I never had just one day that was mine, until now." It was the truth, anyways. It had been the Sam Show from day one, and it was no secret that Campbell resented Sam for it. "Alright?" Sam stared Campbell down, not saying a word. Not at first. Finally, he shook his head. His voice was low. Pained. But he didn't look away from Campbell, not even a little bit. "No." So, that's how it was going to be. "Give me the key, you little fag." He had never called Sam that before, or anything like it. He'd busted plenty of people's lips for less. It felt dirty on his tongue, but it was the one thing that Campbell knew would hurt Sam past the point of forgiveness. And if that didn't work... Campbell shot his hand out and scruffed Sam like a petulant kitten, digging his fingers hard into the back of Sam's neck. "Give me the key." Shock was the first emotion that crossed through Sam's expression. Campbell had never laid his hands on Sam before, either. He'd never needed slurs or physical violence before. But persuasion wasn't working, and maybe shock was exactly what Campbell needed to bring Sam's rage to the surface. It worked like a charm; the fury finally arrived, hurt transforming into a deep, crushing hatred. It was the same hatred that Campbell had seen in Sam the night Oliver was found dead, and fuck, it wasn't what Campbell wanted to see. But it had to happen now, before it happened later. Before Sam got hurt worse. Sam handed over his key to the house, then shoved Campbell hard and walked away. Campbell watched him go. Sam didn't look back. Good. It stung more than Campbell had expected, in some weird, dull way, but it was necessary. Wasn't it? Sam would be with Allie and Cassandra, where it was warm and welcoming and loving. Campbell would be on his own, away from anyone he could easily hurt, with time and space to figure shit out. When he got home, it was dark. He turned on the lights, turned on some music. There was cold cheese pizza still in the fridge; he ate it, not bothering to heat it up first. It was late, and he was tired, but there was a restlessness in him that wouldn't let him sleep. He ended up standing in the living room a bit past midnight, with the lights turned off and just a little bit of moonlight streaming in through the windows. He'd turned off the music, and it was quiet. Perfectly quiet, like he'd always fantasized about. No one to interrupt him, no one to scold or condemn him or look at him funny, or bother him with questions or requests, no one to have to pretend around. Happy, relaxed, carefree... Quarantined. Campbell sat in the middle of the living room sofa, emptiness settling over his shoulders like a frigid, heavy blanket. For the first time in years, he cried.

[angelthefirst1]

Jesus/Beth and the Crossroads/Animal trap

Jesus/Beth and the Crossroads/Animal trap

Are the same story going different directions.

9:08 and all of 9b is Beth’s Story repeated, merged and going the other way let me explain.

First we need to go back to 9:08 where we see Jesus (opposite Beth) plus Daryl and Arron out looking for Eugene (Eugene being the original Washington DC cure man and Beth with her Washing DC spoon links the two of them as proxies in these next scenes.

Eugene even has long hair with a braid and a leg injury

But lets start with Jesus, Daryl and Arron coming across a herd in a field while looking for Eugene.

The herd is roaming in circles and behaving strangely. (Beth's story which I believe the herd signifies and will be demonstrated as we go)

Daryl throws an alarm clock that has a happy clown 🤡 face on it, to distract the herd so they can get away. Once at a safe distance,the camera focuses on the clock with the alarm going off drawing the walkers.

It reads 1:07 but it also has 2 second hands which read 9:12 not sure what the  numbers represent but the two sets of clock hands on top of each other represent the two stories on top of each other - Jesus’s/whisperer story and Beth’s Grady story which is reinforced by the dialogue coming up.

This clock is the time piece that sets the two stories on a collision course and Daryl is the one who sets it off.

Jesus asks Daryl "You put that herd at 140?" (Story or herd number 1)

Daryl: "Yeah"

Jesus: "Looks like more than double that now" (Story doubled)

Arron: "Could be a different herd, one merged with another one" (different story line merged with another one... doubled) Jesus’s Story and Beth’s together.

Daryl "Ain't gonna be there very long, no matter how big it is...  As long as it's going the other way"

The repeat of Beth's story won't take long but its a big story.

9a has pretty much repeated all the main themes of her story but going the other way.

The clock going off while Jesus stares ominously at it (not a good sign for Jesus) and Daryl saying the "doubled herd, or two stories that merged together but now going the other way" is hopefully going to end in her being revealed alive at some stage during the Whisperer story just as Jesus Died at the start of it.

I believe this is the point that Jesus's story and Beth's story collide, from Still to Alone when she first went missing,Grady and after, all merge and start going in opposite directions.

And Daryl just set off the timer to start it going the other way.

Jesus dies at the start of a new story line (the Whisperers) in 9:08

Let's look at Jesus's story in 9b VS Beth's story.

Jesus and Beth suddenly, unexpectedly killed by an outside group (opposite ends of the story)

Daryl shoots both responsible parties in the head. The whisperer that stabbed Jesus, and he shoots Dawn In the head.

Jesus's body however gets brought back to Hilltop where Michonne says "it's good you could bring his body back to bury, and give the people closure" (infuriating for Beth fans right)

Beth's story is going the other way so her events go back to before Jesus was killed and they are looking for Eugene who is the Beth proxy in the following scenes:

Before reading the next scenes understand that the two stories merging require two Beth proxies and two Daryl proxies.

Beth’s Story going backwards = Eugene/ Life,

Going forwards = Jesus/Death

So when you see their names’ think backwards Beth story for Eugene or Forward for Jesus.

Daryl and Arron the same thing applies but Arron = backwards story, Daryl = forwards... until a little later on at the crossroads scene where Daryl does something that flips his and Arron’s positions.

 So 

Daryl, Arron and Jesus find Eugene who has a dislocated knee...

Now that we have the 4 players needed to tell the two stories, they start to go in the different directions.

Arron asks "are you alright?" (just like Daryl did when Beth steps in the trap)

Eugene: "I took a bad step and dislocated my knee, there was a herd on our six and Rosetta was forced to stash me here"

Eugene being found with a leg injury and all four proxies together means the story separates from this point on in different directions. It puts both Beth proxies at the point where she got stuck in the trap and hurt her ankle in front of the walker that had a police badge (as pictured above) and just before Grady. Eugene's story is going backwards to Still, and Jesus’s Story will go forward to Grady where he dies)

Daryl: "If it's just dislocated we can pop it back in" (Beth stuck at Grady, Daryl is sure he can pop her back into his group, get her back)

Eugene: "No the herd (or Beth's story) that followed us here and is on the way back, it's already been through twice its looking for me"

The herd then comes to the barn where they found Eugene, Daryl looks at it and says "No way that's the same herd".

They run with the herd following them and come to a crossroad's with a car.

Look familiar... this crossroads is HUGH implication wise, its a mix between the crossroads where Daryl loses Beth after alone and the car in Still they hide in, and also a representation of what happens after Grady.

We see Jesus and Daryl helping Eugene who is struggling to walk and they come from the same direction in the crossroads that Daryl came when running after Beth.

Eugene rests on the hood of the car. As apposed to Beth and Daryl hiding in the boot in Still.

It then shows Arron who is in the woods behind the crossroads, looking at the herd coming toward him through the trees and runs back to the others the same way Beth and Daryl ran out of the woods and onto the road with the car in Still.

The next part is callbacks to Still and Alone dialogue (backwards story) and forward story line about Beth's s brain being alive after being shot.

Eugene makes the case that the walkers are evolving even though they are dead, the brain is alive and if the brain is alive it can change (Beth "I wish I could just change")

Eugene: “Maybe even start to remember things too, like how to talk”

(Beth “i remember, when that little girl came out of the barn”)

Daryl: shocked "what?"

Jesus: it's not any crazier than the dead being alive in the first place, if they can learn to talk maybe they can learn strategies and how to hunt" (when Beth and Daryl finally started talking in Still, that led to him teaching Beth and her learning how to track and hunt which results in the forward story of stepping in the trap, where they just came from)

It’s at this point Arron comes running saying "they're right on our asses we gotta go, we gotta get to the horses fast" (horses/cars) in Still they got in the trunk. After Grady... well who knows but they seem to be trying to tell us she gets left in the car.

Eugene says while sitting on the car: "You have to leave me behind i’m slowing you down"

I remember back to Still and the look Daryl gave Beth after they get out the trunk and start to walk off, reminded me of this, like Beth felt if she was slowing him down or holding him back cos he looked at her like she was weak.

Jesus: (forward Beth) "what? No we came out here to find you"(me thinks Beth will be a tad annoyed she gets left behind after Grady)

Eugene: "You don't have a choice"

Jesus: "The numbers actually work for us we can split up (2 stories going different ways), you two get him back to the horses. I'll lead them off.

Daryl: "No, if anyone stays it's going to be me, heck I'll probably beat you back to Hilltop anyway" (Here Daryl flips his and Arron's stories as i mentioned earlier, Daryl now becomes the forward story and Arron the backward one. It was meant to end with Jesus leading the herd off and simply ending Beth's forward story but now Daryl has made a switch a move that changes the story, he possibly did something to keep Beth's body from the herd in the forward story line by being the one that stays with her body and he was also the one to set off the alarm clock which made the 2 merged stories (herds) go the other way.

So the 2 Beth's and Back story Daryl (Arron) head out together while forward Daryl and dog goes down the fork in the road where he separates from Arron Jesus and Eugene.

This is amazing because now we have forward story Daryl on his own (No Beth proxy, shes gone in a different direction, its just him with dog)

Jesus, Arron and Eugene leave the crossroads in the opposite direction they came in from while Daryl with his dog takes the fork in the road. (Referencing, that direction is the road that would lead to the Claimers aka Negan and all the story lines that Beth has been missing from since) 

Daryl stops just down this road and tries to get the now passing (doubled) herd which is heading in the same direction as the others, to come his way by lighting fire crackers and getting dog to bark. The herd (story) starts to come his way (which would lead to a repeat of what has already happened with the claimers/Negan and Beth staying missing) but due to the whisperers in the story line combining with the old story it unexpectedly changes direction again and keeps following the others. Daryl is shocked.

We then see Arron, Jesus and Eugene in a foggy grave yard. (Grady)

The story has gone forward to Grady for Jesus because the herd (story) changed direction.

This is where he gets unexpectedly killed by an enemy group.

9:09 we see Jesus get the Burial that Beth Didn't, which should have been in 5:09

Jesus is now dead and the events will play out step by step but backwards from Grady

If we keep going we will keep seeing the backwards story of Beth and Daryl, using different characters to tell it.

Next in Jesus's story line but prior in Beth's, both stories show each side taking hostages from the enemy camp.

Jesus's story line:

Daryl and Michonne kill one whisperer and take Lyida hostage.

At Grady the group killed one cop and took 2 hostage into trade for Beth and Carol.

Next in Jesus's story but prior in Beth's, The whisperers take Luke and Alden hostage (at Grady Carol, Beth)

Next: at Hilltop Henry (another Beth proxy) befriends Lydia (who is a Noah and then Daryl proxy depending on the scene), as its moving backwards it starts with Lydia = Noah as both are prisoners, Henry locked up for drinking. (Beth befriends Noah at Grady)

Once Henry is let out of the cell the Lydia proxy changes to Daryl. And they start a romantic relationship as its going backwards.

In one of my old posts i used this image which has plagued me.

: = Repeat, music sign 6131 GH (Grady hospital) i always felt this story would repeat backwards and now it is finally! but it’s now happened in 9b

  This is already a massive post and i have only just started to scratch the surface, go re-watch 9:08 if you can because you will see how much this makes sense.

In between the scenes i have talked about above you also have Henry scenes of him getting drunk and killing the walker that the other teenagers are abusing

So we have Still themes repeated, which leads to Daryl and Beth talking, or Henry and Lydia talking because Henry gets locked up with her because of the drinking, and as Eugene said the talking leads to the tracking and hunting lessons which lead to the trap, in Lydia and Henry’s case it led to her dealing with the issues of abuse from her mother and changing)

Then there are Negan (=Beth) scenes which i believe is Beth’s forward story proxy.

Locked in his cell he gets out, Steals Judith's compass (Judith =Dawn) Judith lets him go after debating weather to shoot him or not and says keep the compass you'll need it to find your way home there is nothing out there for you. Its repeating Dawn telling Beth they always come back and Negan does end up coming back voluntarily which may point to Beth going back to Grady after getting shot and being left i a car.

It’s very possible that the Grady people follow the group after they leave with Beth's body (if she is in someway connected to a cure story, which i’m still not ruling out.

Doc Edwards might demand they go get her body back asap as even dead she could be valuable

Once the herd causes Daryl and co leave, the Grady cops find her and bring her back for treatment realizing she is alive. But she is now a repeat prisoner at Grady and valuable she will have to escape again. Obviously what happens after to Beth is just guesses at this point but it seems to already be hidden in the story (you just gotta know how to read it)

I might try and continue more before the season 9 final, because i feel like she may make an appearance in a coda like Morgen did at the end of 5:08 where he was completely covered in a mask and thick long clothing, the snow in the final would suit this happening again, then as she takes the mask off.

Boom Beth's alive!!!  

[fadesofcool]

Whole

Author’s Note: Hello friends :) here’s a quick thing I wrote about a hot tub when I was in my Michael feels the other night. He’s just so wonderful and I think you’d have a lot of cute moments with him. Anyway, I hope you enjoy it and if you like it/want more let me know ;]

You had flown out to visit Mikey at the house him and the boys had been staying at while they worked on their new album. When you arrived, Mikey texted you that him and the boys were all out in the backyard. You walked through the house until you reached the back door, sliding the glass door open and stepping out onto the porch. The house had a sprawling grass yard, woods lining the perimeter. There was a fire in the fire pit on the edge of the porch. All the way to one edge of the deck there was a hot tub, where the boys were currently relaxing. Luke was on a lawn chair with a towel wrapped around his shoulders and a girl sprawled on his lap. Ashton was currently digging in the cooler of beers that rested behind the hot tub, Calum sitting in the hot tub with a girl’s arms draped over his shoulders. Mikey sat a few feet away from Calum, relaxing in the hot tub and drinking a beer. You turned and closed the sliding door behind you. The boys turned in your direction, all of them greeting as you walked over to where they were. You walked over next to the hot tub, Michael turning to look at you.

“Hey baby,” He greeted as he put down his beer, resting his arms on the side of the hot tub.

“Hi,” You said, glancing around at the expansive yard.

“Nice place, huh?” Michael said, smiling wide.

“Yeah, it is,” You commented.

“You bring a bathing suit?” Michael asked.

You lifted up the bag you were holding in your hand. “Yup.”

“Good, go get changed. I want you in here,” Michael said, smiling cheekily at you.

“I get to admire you in a bikini? Could this night get any better?” Ashton called out with a wide grin on his face.

“Keep your eyes and your hands to yourself, Irwin,” Michael snapped at Ashton.

“I will if she does,” Ashton replied, winking in your direction.

You rolled your eyes as you turned to head inside to change. “You don’t have to worry about that,”

“I know you want me!” Ashton called out to you, Michael leaning over to splash him playfully.

When you came back outside after changing, the sun was dipping dangerously low in the sky, turning the sky purple and the clouds pink, the night sky creeping up behind it. It almost dark outside as you walked over to the hot tub, but there were fairy lights hung up along the back of the house to keep the back yard well lit. The fire was still roaring in the fire pit, Luke and Calum having moved closer to it with their friends by their sides. Michael and Ash were still in the hot tub when you carefully slipped in, sliding close to Michael.

You sat next to him, his arm draping around your shoulders. The hot water, along with Michael’s body heat, warmed up your skin, which was covered in goosebumps from the night air.

“That color looks good on you,” Ashton said from where he sat directly across from you and Michael, gesturing to your bathing suit with the beer in his hand.

“Thank you,” You answered.

Michael rolled his eyes. “When are you going to stop hitting on my girlfriend?” He asked.

“I’m not hitting on her,” Ash said. “I’m just complimenting her. As a friend.”

“It’s okay Mikey,” You said, turning your head to face Michael. “I only have eyes for you,” You jokingly gushed. Michael smiled as he leaned down to press a kiss to your lips.

“Get a room!” Luke teasingly called out. Michael raised his middle finger in the air as a response, his lips still on yours. You wrapped your arms around Michael’s neck, pulling yourself closer to him. His arms slid down your back until they rested on your hips. It had been so long since you’ve seen Michael, him being hidden away here with the boys while they wrote and recorded, you unable to visit him, until now, due to your equally busy schedule. It felt so good to have his body pressed up against yours, his hands ghosting over your skin, your fingers tangling in his hair.

Ashton let out a groan of disgust. “I’m gonna leave you two alone before you contaminate the water,” He said, getting up and stepping out of the hot tub.

“Hey, no sex in the hot tub!” Calum yelled, his head turned and his eyes on you and Mikey.

Michael groaned. “God, they’re so fucking annoying.”

You giggled. “Why, did you want to have sex in the hot tub?”

“I wouldn’t be opposed to it,” He responded.

“Ew, Michael. That’s disgusting.”

“What? It’s clean,”

You rolled your eyes, readjusting yourself so that your back was pressed to Michael’s chest, sliding down further into the water. Michael’s arm draped over your shoulder, crossing over your chest. You reached your hand up to hold onto his fingers. All of the boys and the girls were seated by the fire, talking amongst themselves. Someone’s phone was plugged into a speaker, soft indie music drifting quietly through the night air.

Mikey pressed his lips to the top of your head.

“It’s so nice here,” You sighed, relaxing into the moment.

“It’s better with you here,” Michael replied, his words muffled by your hair.

“Yeah, I’m pretty great aren’t I?” You asked, your eyes looking up to admire Michael’s features.

Michale chuckled. “Yeah, you are actually. If you weren’t here I’d be stuck with those dipshits over there.”

You scooted down, resting your head on Michael’s chest, leaning back into him, his arm securely around you. You tilted your head back to look at the night sky above you, the bright stars twinkling in the darkness. Michael tilted his head to rest his cheek on the top of your head.

“I’ve miss you,” He murmured.

“I’ve missed you too,” You whispered back.

“I love touring…but sometimes it’s really hard, you know, being away from you and all,” He sighed. You could feel the tension in his body as he spoke.

“It’s hard for me too,” You said hesitantly. You always felt bad telling Michael the truth about how much you missed him while he was gone. He was doing his job, something that he loved, and you didn’t want to make him feel bad about it by saying how difficult it was for you.

“My apartment is quiet without you,” You teased.

“I’m sure it is,” Michael chuckled. “You know what I miss most when I’m on tour?”

“What?” You asked.

“Waking up next to you, well not even next to you, waking up with you laying on top of me.” He laughed at the thought.

“Very funny. What I don’t miss is your snoring,” You replied.

“I don’t miss yours either,” He teased, a smile on his face.

You sat up, turning to look at him. “I don’t snore!” You insisted.

“Sure you don’t. Now come back here,” He said, opening his arms.

You laid back down in the position you were previously in, Michael’s head going back to resting on yours.

You closed your eyes, feeling your body relax against Michaels.

“Maybe you could come and visit me on tour,” He whispered. “I play better when you’re there.”

You looked up at him. “You’re in a band?” You deadpanned.

Michael rolled his eyes, yet he had a smile on his face. “Yeah, you should check us out sometime.”

“Oh don’t worry, I do,”

Michael pushed you lightly. “Don’t even say that. Ashton has a huge crush on you,”

“He does not. He’s only joking,”

“No, he actually likes you. I always have to remind him that you’re my girlfriend.”

You sat up, leaning in towards Michael’s face, his eyes on you.

“Well too bad for him because I happen to have a thing for guitarists.” You whispered, your lips almost brushing his.

“So, like Luke?” He asked, a smirk on his lips.

“No, you, you dumbass,” You smiled.