#because why would you want to look out for a perfectly healthy person who simply can't be bothered to pull their own weight

[basingstokemercury]

anyway to completely digress from all-nighter fuelled semi-poetic character analysis

personal life is rapidly approaching the point of impossibility

yes thank you i know i need a job to get anywhere and it's unfair to expect parents to completely support me when i'm perfectly healthy and the things i need to go into serious theatre aren't exactly cheap

so uh

still waiting to find one single job outside the creative arts that can be performed while being:

lazy, selfish, socially nonfunctioning, irresponsible, unable to maintain focus on boring/repetitive tasks, conflict-averse to the extent of shutting down when confronted, completely irregular sleep schedule, allergic to routine that involves more than a couple scheduled events per week, unsuited to manual labour, and oh yeah absolutely terrible at interviews

"you're such a good teacher" thank you. i've been a student. not going anywhere near a room full of kids.

"you said yourself you want to work with animals" i do. i'm also nowhere near responsible enough to be in charge of caring for little squishy things that could die if my attention wanders.

"waitress -" spent years going to restaurants with the kind of person who annoys waiters. wouldn't be one if it were the only job on earth.

"cashier -" just a less intense version of waitress. and anyway i'd never be able to sit there for hours doing the same thing over and over.

it's awfully touching that people have faith in me but i do think i know my own flaws.

okay that was rough. have a fairfax.

[genshin-scenarios]

Reunion: Preparations for a Trip [Part 6]

Read the first series (Adopt a Wanderer) here! An AU where Scaramouche/Wanderer gets isekaied to your world - a found-family series.

Summary: You have an audience with the Dendro Archon, and make plans to travel to Liyue!

Warnings: contains spoilers of Wanderer’s story in the archon quest!

Wordcount: 1473

Part 1

Part 5 <-

After deciding that you’d like to travel to Liyue since you were already in Teyvat, Kuni was quick to find an excuse to leave Sumeru and accompany you. One condition he hadn’t foreseen though, was Nahida asking to be introduced to his ‘new friend’.

The dendro archon is not what one would call severe or intimidating. Despite her powers over dreams and reading people’s minds, she is known as a benevolent and kind god. You said the same when Kuni asked for your opinion on Nahida, which is how he finds himself in his current predicament - watching you and her hit it off in conversation. Namely conversation about him.

Nahida has the gall to ask you about what foods he likes, what he does in his free time, and other meaningless details that you for some reason are perfectly happy to divulge. Kuni thinks this is an invasion of privacy, while you think Nahida is just asking this for fun, seeing as anyone that observed him for long enough would know the answers to these questions.

“Are you done?” Kuni speaks up from the side of the room, where he’s been lounging in perfect distance to overhear everything. “When you said you wanted to meet Y/N, one would expect you to ask about them rather than me.”

“But they’re the only person that knows you so well! How could I pass off this chance?” Nahida chimes back with a smile. “I’m just glad that your relationship seems to be good. You hadn’t thought of anything particularly negative even though we were gossiping about you.”

“And tell me why were you reading my thoughts instead of theirs?”

“Because I can’t.”

The surprise in the room echoes with resounding silence. Nahida muses to herself, placing her teacup back onto its saucer.

“Lesser Lord— Nahida.” You try to suppress your confusion. “You can’t read my thoughts?”

“Nope. This is the first time I’ve encountered this, too.” She taps her chin. “Perhaps it simply has to do with your origins from another world. I’m a little disappointed, seeing as your dreams would’ve been very interesting to explore. With that said, this means my ability to help you find a way back home might be more limited than I thought.”

Kuni tries not to appear too relieved at that statement. You do the same, though both reactions don’t go unnoticed by Nahida, who takes another sip of tea to mask her amusement.

“Well, would you look at that?” Kuni says. “You’re not as un-extraordinary as we both thought.”

“It’s good to know you’re always my number one supporter at times like these.” You deadpan.

True to her prior agreement, Nahida doesn’t push about your mysterious source of information or attempt to seal you away. She can tell you don’t pose a threat to Teyvat in general, and seemed to be quite conscious about guarding your knowledge about the future.

All in all, a responsible person. Nahida arrives at her verdict. “Your condition seems healthy, so there should be no issues with you traveling around nations. So long as you don’t do anything that spreads the awareness of your knowledge to other parties, Kuni should be able to keep you safe. Just let me know if you ever need help with anything! I’m willing to write off the next few weeks as community service on his part.”

Nahida really does feel like Kuni’s guardian figure at times like these; their interactions are pretty wholesome.

“Thank you so much!” You bow your head in respect, before turning to Kuni. “See? That wasn’t so bad.”

“Speak for yourself.” He rolls his eyes before walking towards the exit. “If that’s all, I’ll just wait outside. I’m sure there’s stuff you want to ask the God of Wisdom.”

“We won’t be long!” You call out to Kuni, who waves his hand over his shoulder dismissively. Once he’s out of the room, you peer at Nahida - your previous confidence and bravado settling into something more nuanced. “I… I’m sorry if my presence here - in general, causes any complications.”

“I already said that you’re welcome to continue your stay, and I meant every word.” Nahida meets your gaze warmly. “Though I do not share the same burdens of knowledge as you do, my intuition tells me that you mean well. And if you could earn Kuni’s trust, that only furthers my judgment.” She trails off, refocusing the conversation. “...But that’s not what you wanted to ask me about.”

There are a hundred questions you’d like the answer to, such as the science of what allowed you and Kuni to meet all those years ago. But instead, you ask Nahida something that only you can decide for yourself. Such are the woes of human worries, to hope for an outside source to reassure or make grating decisions for you. 

“Do you think I should distance myself from all this?” You purse your lips. “I’m sure you can tell that the Traveler will be an important part of this world’s future. Maybe I should just live a quiet life until I’m returned home, and avoid interacting with those who are a part of their story.”

“Would that involve leaving Kuni behind?”

Feeling a lump in your throat, you look down at your lap. “Technically speaking, none of us would remember anything once I go home, if things worked the same as before… It’ll conclude like none of this ever happened.” That would also mean we’re spending stolen time.

Nahida reaches across the table and places her hand over yours. It’s small, but comforting. Like a leaf offering shade to a tiny animal. “Is that what you want, or are you simply feeling guilty about gaining positives from this situation?”

“I’m not sure.”

“Think about it this way.” Nahida says. “In a world where so many things are out of our control, would it be so selfish to claim what we can as ours, and spend our time doing what makes us happiest?” Her voice falls quieter. “Sometimes it’s not about what’s wrong or correct, but what’s right for us. You would not be the worst person for living by that reasoning.”

What decision would make you happier, and what feels right to you?

Dropping Kuni all of a sudden without asking for his opinion beforehand… after all he’s done for you, would most certainly feel ‘wrong’. Treacherous, even.

It seems you’ve come to a decision after all.

-

“How was the talk?” Kuni asks as you pick out supplies from a shop. You seemed a little happier after leaving the room with Nahida, who bid the both of you a safe trip in advance.

The Dendro Archon also asked for a souvenir as part of his ‘assignment’, but that’s the least of his worries for now (he’s quite sure you’ll end up buying things for Nahida anyways, with how fond you seem of her).

“She really is wise - and kind.” You smile, a bit of cheek entering your tone. “It does feel a little like nepotism to have the chance to meet her, though. You’re quite connected, ‘Hat Guy’.”

“I’m not even going to ask how you know that nickname.” He sighs, but is otherwise satisfied with your answer. Looks like whatever question you had for Nahida has been aptly answered. “There’s still an entire day ahead of us. If we leave now, we can arrive at Liyue before dinnertime.”

“Sounds good! Just let me pack some items from home and I’ll be good to go.” Your chipper mood comes to a pause as reality hits you. “W-Wait… we’ll be walking, right?”

“The entire way. Running included for you if we run into any monsters.”

“Suddenly, I’m starting to feel like being a homebody isn’t so bad after all…”

“If you hurry we can hitch-hike on someone’s carriage.”

Giving Kuni a salute, you duck into the treehouse as soon as you reach the door. “Aye aye, captain! Ow!”

Kuni gives you the grace of ignoring how you ran into the table. “By hurry, I meant under fifteen minutes. I’d like to not lug an unconscious person to Liyue.”

“You should’ve said that before I mortally wounded myself!”

“If you can still talk, you’re fine.”

Shenanigans aside, Kuni realizes this would be your second time going on a trip together. There’s no train to take or websites to book last-minute accommodations, but the look in your eyes says you have a pretty solid idea of where to go and what to do.

Hah, it seems that even now, you were still the leader in some ways. It doesn’t feel too bad, though. Things are a little less boring when he’s around you - whether it be in the way you treat him, react to his comments, or your outlander origins. It feels a little bit like having a ‘home’.

.

.

.

-> Part 7 (finale)

[sunny-mercya]

Casino Blues

01. First Heist

Rusty Ryan x Male Reader | Platonic! Danny Ocean x Brother Reader

Fandom -> Ocean's Trilogy

Masterlist | Previous / Next | Prototype OS

When Danny, after being out of prison, asked Rusty to join him at a Grand Coup of heist—Rusty had only agreed halfway to it. After all, he wanted to know for what exactly they would rob and risking their lives and freedom for.

Especially freedom, because Rusty sure as hell—damned he will be—didn't want to get caught and being send, like Danny, into prison. He simply couldn't afford such ending.

And when Danny told him, they gonna rob—not only one but three—Casinos in good old Viva Las Vegas, Rusty wanted to know a even far more good enough reason for him to join in such madness.

And Danny, like the best friend and charming asshole he is, told Rusty the only valid reason he needs to have;

»If we pull this off and I promise you, we will. You can finally pay the devils debt and free [Name], moving to wherever your heart desires and afford the safety you have promised him.«

Danny was right, hitting a wound point in Rusty's ego, because there had been one thing Rusty—in all those years—couldn't do and that was giving you proper protection. Protecting you from a past, you would never be able to free yourself from it, if you didn't have a certain amount of money for it.

»Okay, I'm in. But if we fail, I'm gonna send you personally to hell, Danny boy.«

Rusty might have agreed, trusting and believing in his friend that they will manage this with a 100 percentage chance of successful winning—but he also knew what price it would cost him, because if they indeed fail. It would be you, who Rusty would lose and you're more worth to him than all the money and jewels in the world.

~~~

So far, the whole plan went, besides minor improvements, smoothly good.

Rusty could almost imagine the millions of Dollar he would have soon. Enough money to buy you free and finally live with you in peace.

Just you and him, thought Rusty, imagining the new chapter of life—fully secure, comfortable and happy healthy—he would have with you and maybe a big family with lots of cats and dogs.

„Uh, uhm, Rusty there's–“ „Rusty, there's a problem. A you problem.“

»What?« asked Rusty through the mini microphone, scrunching up his face in confusion—forgetting his cup of jello momentarily. Another problem? What do they mean with "you"-problem?

„Look towards the entrance. You might need to prepare for a divorce too.“

»Fuck. Give me some extra minutes to sort this out.«

»Robert Russel James Ryan! You do not leave our house in such fucking manners. How fucking dare you! Do you know how fucking worried I was?!«

A few people had turned their heads, starting to gossip already, when you marched forward to Rusty and shouted in anger at him.

Ouch, shouting his full name—you're furious, a deadly threat of trait of yours, with him and it was Rusty's own fault.

Rusty took a few steps forward, discarding his cup of jello and raising both of his hands in surrender—wanting to appease you.

Honestly, he haven't seen you this angry, ever since Danny and he had a fistfight with your "Boss"—which they of course had lost, as they couldn't win against a knife and knuckleheads—and you were so upset with them, that you cussed them out so much—they were taken aback by it, spook them just a little—while you treated their wounds.

So yes, Rusty—and as well Danny—knew your kind of anger very well.

»Hey, love, watcha doing here?« Rusty was curious how you got here—as you should be in sunny California, safe and sound in the apartment.

»Don't come with such bullshit. You know perfectly well, why the fuck I'm here. So tell me now, Robert, the fuck are you and Danny—and I know the fucker is here as well—suspiciously planning to do here?!« you had raised your finger, pointing threatening at him.

Rusty inhaled and exhaled deeply through his nose, trying to think of ways to get you away from here—before you either might could get harmed by accident, being caught in the metaphorically crossfire or causing a disturbance to their plan.

Though, perhaps, he could use you for a good distraction, but no—no, no, he had sworn himself to not do such things with you.

Gripping your arms gently, Rusty pulls you close to his side and leads you away to a more secluded area of waiting.

Rusty brought you a glass of cold Cola, which you begrudgingly took from your husband. Taking a few sips from it, you gave Rusty a pointed look—almost a frown or angry glare—awaiting an explanation from him.

~~~

Waking up to an empty bedside wasn't what had spooked you into a worry—it was the discovery that your husband was nowhere in the apartment and that he couldn't be called and neither Danny.

It might didn't seem like big problem for most people, but for you it was—considering your past and what happened to Rusty and Danny back then.

Your mind raced with unpleasant thoughts and memories. Every possibility of what if's run through, flooding you with anxiety.

Rusty could've been; in a accident, being in hospital injured, arrested—most likely, your husband is certainly not a innocent man and had done some bad things of illegally—you're not a saint either though—you're aware of it—or worst case scenario, your Boss signed of the deal and killed Rusty.

God, it causes waves of nausea inside your stomach. Lungs feeling so tight, it was hard to breathe for the next minutes and your body, shaking like unstable tower during an earthquake.

»Fucking above, I swear to, Rusty will get his share fair of talk from me to hear.« you grumbled out, cursing loudly when you hit your hand somewhere.

You needed to sit down for a few minutes, stress getting too high and head too light.

~~~

».....surprise«

»Repeat that?« you blinked at him, haven't registered one word of what Rusty just had told you.

»I said, I can't tell you what me and Danny doing here, because it's a surprise, love«

»Rusty, you tell me now, why you and Danny are here or so god help me.«

»My love, I can't. It's a surprise«

Perhaps, in retrospective, Rusty shouldn't have woken you up in the early hours of morning—still in a daze of sleep, in between slumber of dreams—and telling you, in a half-truth, about a little trip he's gonna do, kissing you goodbye.

And yeah, maybe Rusty should have told you personally about the little heist they gonna do, but then it wouldn't be a surprise anymore and Rusty loved it to surprise you.

»Fuck your surprise, Rusty. I honestly thought he had signed off the deal and oh, I don't know, killed you. I was worried sick, asshole.«

»I know, I know my dear. I should have told you, I know. Could my prince forgive me?«

Rusty leaned in closer, whispering the last few words in your ear as he asks for your forgiveness, ghosting small kisses over face and your lips—when you remain silent.

You rolled your eyes at Rusty antics, but couldn't help yourself to smile.

„Not to bother, rus, but time management?“

Sometimes, Rusty thought—holding back a groan of annoyance—the guys sure could be a mood killer and pain in the ass. It's his and Danny's team though and a teams a team and they a job to do.

»Wait for me at Helios-Motel, I'll be there in like a hour.«

Rusty kissed you one more time on the lips, before standing up. You had taken hold of his hand, before he could walk away.

»You promise me, you and Danny will be safe?«

»Of course, my prince.«

If Rusty might be caught today's night and they would ask him for his reasons, he would tell them; it's you, you're his sole reason for everything he does.

[thesapphireprincess]

Let’s talk about doing the damn thing

By doing the damn thing I mean actually working toward your goals with physical action

What is it that you want in your life? What do you truly want that will make you happy? I’ll tell you what I want. I want to be able to come home without a single worry about my necessities in life but it is more than that. I want to be able to walk into any store and not worry about the price tag, a life of abundance. I want to be able to wake up to an alarm by choice, I want the alarm to go off because I want to wake up at a certain time not because I have to be at this job at a certain time in order to keep a roof over my head. This is what I want. I want to be my own boss and run my own business, this is what I want. What is it that you want?

It’s always been my dream to be my own boss and run my own company since I was 9 years old. I am now 23 and I got a little lost through out the years, nothing too heavy just being surrounded by the wrong people. I always wondered why when I would cut off every toxic person in my life I would suddenly be focused on my future but then another test would come and I would fail that test and be lost again and unhappy. Friend groups are not for me. Friend groups are usually toxic and full of so much unnecessary drama. I always felt left out in friend groups. I think I’m meant to be solo until I am so stuck on my path that it would take a literal meteor to knock me off. I prefer to have friends but not a friend group. At the moment I don’t have any friends because as you can probably guess I cut them all off. While I’ve been in Texas I haven’t made any solid friends. The people I’ve met haven’t been too consistent but ig that is for the best. I am not meant to have friends right now. I would like to have a few friends but I want true friends not fake ones. If I was meant to have friends right now I would simply have them, am I right?

Let’s get into the main topic of this post “doing the damn thing”. Just recently I’ve come into myself in a way that I’ve never before. Being content with who I am and where I am. I didn’t say comfortable I said content. Even though I am content with myself I’m still looking for ways to improve and grow in every way possible in order to reach my goals. There are things that I need to do and that I am working on in order to create my dream life. I hope this makes sense. Ik what I need to do to be successful and I need to do more than that. I need to push myself harder not like a working mule because never that. I mean I can feel that I am being lazy in certain areas that I shouldn’t be lazy in. It’s a slight adjustment and it’s not going to burn me. Pushing myself to work towards my goals is so important to me. I want to stick to a schedule, be organized and realistic with myself. I want a balance of work, rest and fun. I’ve been dabbling too much in the rest part so it’s not balanced. I will fix this in time. I have figured out a good schedule and now I just have to try it out.

I want to be able to date the kind of men I want to date. I want to be taken out to really nice places with men who are well dressed, handsome, wealthy, generous, smart, and kind. A gentleman. I have the image of the kind of men I want to date and eventually be with but in return I have to become a women of means. Turning myself into who I’ve always imagined myself to be is something I want. I want to be seen as a woman not a girl. Becoming her requires not only beauty but brains and trust me I have the beauty thing down. I am working on the other half, the brains. Me becoming my Dream version has nothing to do with a man btw but I definitely don’t want to be single forever. I want to be in a healthy relationship and I’m not going to pretend that I’m perfectly ok with being alone for the rest of my life or being 40 with no husband or kids. If that’s what you want that’s fine but that’s not what I want. When I am 40 I want to have a husband or 40 with a husband and kids no in betweens. I want to get married in my mid or late 20’s and then maybe have kids in my early 30’s. I deserve love and I deserve to be with the man of my dreams. Hello like attracts like. I’m done dating men who aren’t what I truly want. I want a Bruce Wayne archetype minus the mommy and daddy issues. I mean the look: dark hair, handsome, young and wealthy. A Mentally healthy and wealthy man. I want someone kind and adventurous with the means to give me and show me true romance. I want someone who can give me a life worth truly living. I want the career, the husband, the lifestyle and family of my dreams. So I will become the woman of me dreams. I’m only 23 and a lot can happen in a year especially with hard work. I refuse to be stagnant in life, I refuse to waste my youth doing nothing and I refuse to waste all the opportunities life has to offer when you choice to knock on the door of your dreams. With all of this being said, stop being stagnant. Stop wasting your time and do the damn thing.

[lets-try-some-writing]

Okay, I know you just said you were busy, but I got something. What’s your take on Optimus and Elita-One’s relationship? I personally loved their moments in G1 and wished they had more. Also, Optimus deserves to be in a healthy relationship after all he’s been through. No pressure to get this done! I just wanted to put it out there. :)

My take? As in my thoughts? Well I can do that fairly easily. Sorry if you were expecting a proper story from this. But based on your ask I assume this an opinion thing. Please feel free to send in a more specific request if I butchered this.

To start off then, let me just say I 100% believe that Optimus and Elita are a match in heaven. I am fond of other ships, but these two were the first I ever saw in TF media and I adore them. I could go on and on about why I love them but I will try to put it simply.

In the beginning they were young, naive, and helm over pedes for each other as seen in the time travel episode in G1. Orion Pax and Ariel were close as could be and they seemed to compliment each other well. Orion was tough but still loving and Ariel was soft but still firm in keeping Orion reasonable. They kept each other in check and seemed to mesh well personality wise. Their love was young, energetic, and fun filled. It was not a mature attraction, but there was true devotion between them even in those days.

The tides of war didn't change that much. Even after Optimus and Elita were rebuilt in G1 to be who they needed to be, they still held a few core principles even as they aged. They were still loyal, their love burning bright even across millions of years and countless star systems. They supported each other through everything and came right back together like two parts of a puzzle when they were given opportunities to meet. There was always respect and love between them, no toxicity and no bad blood. Always affection and care even after so many millennia of war while also keeping the mutual desire to offer advice without fear of backlash.

It is a true example of undiluted affection and unconditional care that I think more ships with Optimus could use. Honestly other depictions of their interactions make me rather saddened. I truly do wish Elita and Optimus were given more chances to be a couple in other media. They are so very sweet and pure and they work perfectly together. Every single time they worked together they were in perfect sync, stepping in time and fighting like two parts of the same mech. Their relationship deserved better than to be thrown aside and largely forgotten.

The depictions I have seen in other media have usually been this tense back and forth tug of power that just isn't right. Elita respects Optimus because he is a good leader and a compassionate mech, and Optimus respects Elita for her abilities and her passion. They don't need to be at each other's throats in every other continuity or stuck working together in a heated situation because there was no other choice.

They deserved better and I would pay good money to see them given some proper screen time even as just good friends.

*cough* looking at you Earthspark. Don't fail me. *cough*

[drbased]

What's the root of this whole promiscuous women are "used up" thing? I understand that men are somehow convinced that sex irreversibly changes a woman, but I just can't make sense of the logic of it - like I just saw a popular social media post authored by a man who broke up with his girlfriend after finding out she had hookups on a weekly basis throughout college. The entire scenario is bizarre to me because nothing was materially wrong with her or the relationship, nothing was wrong with the quality of the sex, and nothing was even said about her body being physically different to other, more virginal women, yet he still viewed her as irredeemably desecrated. This man threw away an entire deeply intimate relationship over small insecurities and other men look at him in awe as a beacon of masculinity??? Really?? I just do not get it.

I'm going to disappoint you here but I don't really understand it either. I can write paragraph after paragraph of theory but on a personal level it still completely floors me - men have a system of 'logic' that is fundamentally alien to anything human and healthy and natural and I think we need to start thanking the gods that it's something we can't empathise with. But here's what I do understand - on a 'logical' level, if not emotional/human:

Firstly, throughout history there has been no separation between rape and sex. We don't think about this today, but the concept of 'consent' is fairly new in culture: historically, a man claims a woman through sex/rape. When men say they want to 'break' a woman through sex, they're talking about rape. The idea that a woman is irreversibly changed through sex is a quiet acknowledgement of the fact that rape changes a woman. That's exactly why rape is a such a good 'claiming' tactic: it's a form of torture, and the resulting trauma will disrupt the woman's ability to make decisions, including the decision to leave.

Men who believe it's possible to claim a woman, that she can be 'damaged' by sex, are rape-supporters if not rapists themselves. They believe in the power of rape, not in terms of its practical damage of women but rather in the sacred power of rape in the Collective Male Heterosexual Domination Over Woman At All Costs. They may have been having what can be functionally called 'consensual sex' with the woman they're dating, but ultimately they don't believe in consent: whether or not they made her by force, took advantage of her whilst drunk, coerced her through financial means, pestered her until she gave in, 'wooed' her through gifts, or simply that she had been conditioned into finding a man and sleeping with him based on societal pressure, men make no distinction between these things: they are all 'claiming'. The idea that she consented is fundamentally useless here, because there's an existing framework that works perfectly well without it. So every time a man sleeps with a woman, the more 'human' ones would rather not traumatise her too bad because, well, that would look pretty bad on them - but they still want to claim her regardless. They still hang onto this belief that they've managed to rape her on a technicality and this whole 'consent' thing is something that feminists made up to pretend we're not being raped all the time. This man wanted to believe that he had claimed this woman, but if she's already been 'claimed' by multiple men first, he simply cannot get the idea out of his mind that she was already raped and broken by them a long time ago.

Men claim that they hate the idea of women 'having sex', with other men, but they don't believe that women experience sexual pleasure until they're 'broken'. They don't believe that women experience sexual pleasure until they have been sufficiently claimed, traumatised, and subsequently have 'given up'. Like everything women do, we're supposed to only want it when he wants it. In practice that means never really consenting, simply 'enjoying what's given to you'. Men's belief is that once they claim a woman, she will only ever enjoy sex with him - because 1. he is a super unique and mommy's specialist little guy and 2. because that's his reward for claiming her. Only he gets to see and cause sexual pleasure - that's his reward. Of course, he doesn't even care most of the time if he gives her pleasure, but he's supposed to be the only one who can. For this reason, men make no functional difference between a slut and a whore: women who seemingly enjoy sex are no different than those who are factually being used for sex: because consent never mattered, and men believe that rape is what causes women to enjoy sex. If women are going out and enjoying sex, that's because they're succumbing to the conditioning by men that's primed them to be raped easily, and their 'enjoyment' is a measure of their quick acceptance to be claimed. That's what makes women 'easy'. Women are supposed to play 'hard to get' because no one wants a trophy that's easily won: men want to claim women through sex, and they want to make sure they have been the first to give her that trauma so big enough that he will be in her mind forever. The stuff about 'loose vaginas' etc. are just a gish-gallop: all the nonsense and double standards about women being sluts is designed to distract from the fact that men have no distinction between sex and rape, and they use the trauma of rape to claim a woman.

Men already have a functioning framework that simplifies and categorises the world as to their liking: it's easier to believe that you can simply claim a human being as your slave with one easy act that trauma-bonds them to you forever. Men are bonded to each other in an existentially terrified Collective Male Heterosexual Domination Over Woman At All Costs. In this system, neither men nor women are whole human beings - but rather each is symbolic of something more important. And to men, women have to represent everything that men are not: men have to view themselves as better than women because otherwise they'd have to face the harsh reality of their biological redundancy. Men have put their entire stake into this idea that they're the creators, the providers, the protectors, the claimers. They are the true humans, and their violence is proof that they're exercising their full power of humanity - that is, their full power to want. The mere fact that women can be raped is proof that on a biological level we don't want sex enough, and thus we can't ever be fully human. To men, women represent the crudity of nature (including how it is fully capable of replicating itself without them needing to be involved), and it's a crudity that needs to be conquered and claimed. It's the only way they can prove they're 'better' than us.

Men envy female friendships because they see the positive impact that it has on our psyche - something more powerful than all the raping they've been doing. But if they admit that kindness and empathy are traits that make us human, and that destruction is a crudity of nature, then the sunk-cost fallacy of rape is laid clear. Since they form part of the Collective rather than merely being an individual who learns their lesson all too late, actual progress on this stance is incredibly slow if not impossible: they've built the entirety of society on this existential terror. Just like a tyrant who runs his country into the ground for his own ego, men are inherently irrational - because they're terrified of the basics of life and existence in a way women simply aren't. You know how if you know a meal is coming then you're OK with being hungry, as opposed to it not being near mealtime and you're suddenly hyper-focusing on how hungry you are? Men are like that with their entire lives. They will put up with all this immense psychological discomfort, they will throw away materially beneficial things all the time because if they hang on a little longer, mommy will come along and fix all their problems - she will 'feed his ego' by 'willfully' debasing herself to prove he's better than her. The only thing men care about preserving is that they're Super Special and Above Women: that's it. No real rational decisions can ever be made when your motive is to achieve something that is essentially a symbolic concept tha only exists in your mind. That is why men have 'fragile egos'.

[lily-janus]

Take A Break

Summary: Logan first thinks of Janus as a smart but lazy person, but he's about to be proven wrong.

Pairing: pre-romantic loceit

Warnings: none that I can think of but do let me know if I missed any.

Word count: 1,225

For @loceitweek day 3 Law School/Astronamy

(I have no idea how law school work so it might sound more like regular school but bare with me😅)

-----------------

"...and then I will argue that the evidence is not really reliable because- are you listening?" Logan stopped his explanation, noticing that his… partner was, once again, not paying attention.

"Hm?" Janus hummed, focusing his gaze on Logan's own, "were you saying something?" He smirked, knowing full well how that will annoy Logan.

"You know as well as I that I've been," he used air quotes, " 'saying something', for the past hour. We need to do this assignment perfectly, Janus." Logan said, exasperated by his classmate.

Okay, don't tell Janus that, but Logan really does think Janus was an incredibly intelligent person, there were multiple occasions throughout the semester where Janus had impressed Logan with his arguments.

That being said, Janus had a tendency to be… extremely frustrating. Acting cocky and smug most of the time, egging people on with no more reason than simple amusement… and, of course, his cryptic way of behaving. And, for some unknown reason, Janus seems to enjoy annoying Logan the most out of all their classmates.

Always cornering him after lectures, arguing with him during lessons no matter what side he chooses, or are assigned to.

So, when they were chosen to work this assignment together… Logan was, at the very least, not pleased. Not that he'd ever defy the will of their teacher, so he was stuck with his smug classmates who didn't seem to care enough to even listen to Logan's ideas.

Janus shrugged, "maybe I know that, and maybe I don't, I could have a very short attention span for all you know about me, which isn't much besides my brilliant intelligence that I repeatedly show in class." Janus smirked smugly again.

Logan let out a frustrated sigh, "can we just be serious long enough to finish this?" He asked, on the verge of begging. He never ever failed at anything and he's not about to let Janus change that.

Janus groaned, "Jesus, Teach, ever heard of relaxing? We still got months until the due date." He pointed out.

"While true, you neglect the fact that this assignment is only one out of many others we have from other classes, plus my reputation to hand in assignments early-" but he was interrupted by another, rather exaggerative, groan from Janus.

"You talk a lot." Janus complained.

Logan could feel his eye twitching in annoyance, "well, it would seem like I'm the only one out of the two of us who's doing anything, why are you even in law school if you're not willing to put effort into anything?" Logan asked with a groan of his own, not really looking for an answer, mostly wanting to annoy Janus back.

But of course, that didn't work, as Janus' smirk only grew, seeming more satisfied the more frustrated Logan became. "I wouldn't say that, I put lots of effort into my studies, I'm just balancing it more so I won't get overwhelmed and burned out. Surely you can appreciate a healthy work balance, right Teach?"

Logan's fist hit the table, "stop calling me that!"

Janus was unphased, "how about… professor? Nerd? Glasses? Ooh, maybe Specs?"

"How about simply Logan?" Logan suggested, as calmly as he could.

Janus faked thinking it over before shaking his head, "nah, I like Specs best."

With a growl of frustration, Logan dropped his pen and pushed his chair away from the desk, "I think we're done for today.."

Janus clapped his hands together in glee before standing up, "marvelous! Same time next week?" He winked at Logan.

Logan blushed slightly at the gesture for some reason, "ah.. sure."

Janus smirked again, "it's a date, Specs!" He called as he walked out of Logan's dorms.

That statement caused Logan's blush to deepen, which was… odd.

…

"Oh he is totally flirting with you, Lo!" Roman, his roommate, said after Logan finished telling him about Janus.

Logan huffed, "I doubt annoying me is considered flirting." Roman was being ridiculous again, there's no way!

Roman shook his head with a sigh, "sometimes I forget how little you understand about the delicate art of romance." He said, "it's because he likes you!"

Logan almost laughed at Roman's statement, "that's absurd, we're both completely different and he always gets out of his way just to get a rise out of me and… always corners me after class and…" he trailed off in thought.

"And trying to get your attention and more time to be with you?" Roman finished for him with a knowing smile.

The more Logan thought about it now, the more Roman's explanation made sense… is he feeling the same way?

"Oh my stars! You're blushing! You like him too! Oh, the robot finally found his heart!" Roman swooned, placing both his hands on his heart in a dramatic gesture.

Logan shook his head, "n-no, no. Janus doesn't like me and I don't like him."

Roman was still smiling knowingly at him, "ah ha, sure, whatever you say, Calculator Watch." He winked at him.

…

"You're late." Logan said when Janus finally showed up to their second meeting to work on their assignment.

As usual, Janus was unphased, he simply walked in, took his seat on Roman's red beanbag, put his legs up on a chair and leaned back on his hands. Choosing the most dramatic position to show his carefree attitude towards this assignment that they were supposed to work on together.

"Sorry, Specs, it took longer than I thought it would, but I'm here now aren't I?" Janus looked up at Logan to where he sat in front of his work desk.

"It?" Logan asked, "what were doing that took so long?" He asked, barely two seconds passed and he was already starting to get annoyed. What could possibly be more important than law school? Does Janus hold no regards to-

"Our assignment, of course." Janus said casually, halting Logan's thoughts in their place for a minute.

"Excuse me?" Logan asked, surely he didn't hear that correctly.

Janus smirked and handed Logan the notebook he's been holding, "o-u-r a-ssign-ment." He said slowly, emphasizing every syllable.

Eyeing Janus suspiciously, Logan took the notebook and looked it over… he really did do it…

Janus suddenly hopped to his feet, offering Logan his hand, "now that the boring stuff is out of the way, it's time for you to relax with me." He smirked at him.

Logan frowned, "what do you mean?"

Janus sighed, "I really need to spell it out to you, huh?" He chuckled to himself, "fine. Logan, will you go on a date with me?"

Logan flushed a deep red, "b-but there's still work to-"

"Logan." Janus cut him off, suddenly serious, "you really need to learn to take breaks from time to time, you're not helping anyone by running yourself to the ground."

"I'm… not running anywhere, let alone to the ground…" Logan stammered, trailing off.

Janus snickered again, "it means you're overworking yourself, c'mon, I'll take you to my favorite Cafe' on campus." Janus gently grabbed one of his hands and tagged on it.

Still flushing, Logan gave in, putting Janus' notebook on his desk before standing up and following Janus.

Perhaps Janus had a point, he doesn't remember taking a single break other than sleep since the start of semester. And, well, Janus wasn't the worst person to take his first break with…

[lavathein]

Oh my God, this is really not funny. And do you know why? Because you absolutely don't understand what you're writing here, and especially when you say that Sylvie deserves hatred and what you wrote in caps. You are a perfectly sane and healthy person if you think this is normal, so let's continue.

Why don't you write the same about Loki, who deceived Thor and practically killed him? Or how about when he conspired with Thanos to take over Midgard and in the process killed countless people? Or when, out of a desire for revenge, he led the Dark Elf to cause chaos for Odin, resulting in Frigga's death? No? What's the matter, is it because he has trauma or someone else is to blame? But according to your logic, that doesn't work, and he also deserves what you're writing about Sylvie?

Do you know why this is happening? Because you look at it from Loki's perspective and are willing to overlook any actions he takes, but when Sylvie does something, you react with, "How dare she, such a bad person!" The whole point of the show was that there is no right or wrong, they both have the same goal where both Loki and Sylvie want to save lives. Both of them. The anger should be directed at Kang, he is the one who started all this mess, not Sylvie, not Loki, not even the TVA, but that idiot.

No one is diminishing Loki's sacrifice, it's not about that, but the fact that the show is so artificial that everything is specifically designed to:

A) Have Loki heroically sacrifice himself;

B) Drama, tears, pain, Drama, Tragedy.

When it's written well, it touches your soul, and yes, for those who care only about Loki, they can watch and think, "Yes, he's a hero, well done, super." Loki alone, she should have been there -- Well sorry, none of the fans are responsible for the writers wanting to make it that way LOL

I and some other people, no, just because it breaks the wall that supports the depth and reality of what is happening, and the writers were so caught up in one idea that they neglected other things.

After s1, I can't see the TVA as angels; they killed and tortured people, and despite the propaganda, they did it on their own and even enjoyed it like sadists because they simply didn't consider themselves equal to the variants. Just remember B-15 and Mobius's attitude towards Loki, and now they say, "They were always good, it's only Sylvie who is bad..." And what did she do? She just wanted to stop the killings long before Loki did. And you say for that she deserves to be beaten with sticks and the death penalty. Incredibly "logical."

And why? Because she didn't agree with Loki, oh God, how could that be.

Again, why is this? Because why on earth should she believe the person on the throne who is deceiving her? Especially considering the second season, he really sat there and blatantly lied to them. Loki didn't have the same experience as Sylvie to hate Kang, but it's not about that. If the danger they talk about exists, his death doesn't particularly solve anything, so he refuses, not because he disagrees with Sylvie, but because he wants to see other options.

AND NOW, ATTENTION: Sylvie is still a variant of Loki, and like Loki, she won't give up on her goal and her perspective. Who is worse, who is better? Neither. Because both don't want anyone to suffer. Both have common goals.

S2 becomes such a farce at some point that we are so much on Loki's side that the show doesn't try to show what would happen if Loki kills her, or if Kang stays and what's his plan, and it's ridiculous. Why should Loki kill her? Because he has feelings (Absolutely don't care if you like it or not), he would hurt himself and become alienated, as Kang needs. Because such a Loki can be controlled, he would lose faith in anything, his friends would have their memories erased, and they would continue what they were doing. No happy ending with pies.

But the show demonizes Sylvie, like she's the bad one, and the TVA is good, to emphasize once again that Loki is pure and fluffy. Loki has already sacrificed himself, long ago. Especially for me, it's obvious who he is and that he will always sacrifice for those he loves, but the show can't show this without demonizing someone, in this case, Sylvie, because she killed a murderer, not Loki. Though in the end, his sacrifice and everything the TVA does happens only because of what Sylvie did and because Kang is dead and no longer in control. But you don't see this because of the blindness that season 2 artificially created by rearranging priorities.

Because I like and love both Loki and Sylvie, I don't treat the mistakes either of them makes as a catastrophe because they are alive, and both make mistakes and do things that are completely normal. The Loki show is quite philosophical and usually makes you at least turn on your brain a little, rather than dividing into black and white, here's an angel, and here's a demon. You absolutely don't understand the meaning of the show beyond the factor of Loki being a selfless hero who saved those he loves. That's great, but besides this, there are other things that happened behind the scenes, making people not understand the context, and that's why it's annoying.

[capriciouscaprine]

oooooops, accidentally called out my mom about her weird eating habits yesterday! (followed by my usual rambling about this fun little body hobby we share)

she was fussing about me not getting everything out of her car when I was helping her out (she had told me to do one specific thing, which I had done), and I joked that I didn't want to be asking questions about all of her stuff, and when she said, 'like what?', I said, 'oh, you know, all of your rice cakes' which she has also mildly joked about before (she'll have more than one pack open at a time rolling around in the passenger seat), but this time she got all serious and mumbled something about wanting to look good for my cousin's wedding in July (when she's been buying them for 10+ years now at least)

I handled it in the moment by pointing out that she's made it this far in life and has friends who love her no matter what (of course this means nothing for how you feel about yourself), and she just brushed it off and moved on

meanwhile, I'm HYPED to stick to what I've been doing and work towards being even more consistent and doing more aka consuming less

from other people's comments and behaviors towards me, I seem to be teetering on the edge of 'are you okay?'/being 'too' small (5'4", one-thirty at last check, skele just barely beginning to pop out) with about four months still to go before this wedding with all the relatives who are very supportive of each other but still gossip about which eating plans each of them and their friends are doing

I WILL be their warning, their omen, the representation of what happens when you take that sort of talk to the extreme, because ultimately there is no way to be, essentially, fatphobic in moderation

once you value being small and alter your life to chase that even as it makes you miserable, there is no way to do that in a healthy way:

if you are healthy, you are working out because you value the strength and flexibility of your body or the camaraderie of the gym, you eat a variety of vegetables and proteins because they are tasty and keep you full and energized, and you enjoy your drinks and desserts because they're tasty and fulfill you emotionally; a scale might be informative, but mostly because it's good to know if your weight changes suddenly, because it could be an indicator of a health issue of some sort (tumors can show up as weight gain, a digestive illness can present as a loss, etc)

we aren't healthy, and we (should) know that; restricting, doing only liquids for days at a time, straight up pacing to hit step goals, consuming media specifically to encourage all of our behaviors, etc: all symptoms of a particular illness that we would claim openly on here except for the part where our blogs keep disappearing over it

the younger folks among us might not realize it consciously (and some older folks, too), but we're all here because of societal fatphobia that values being tiny over being healthy; there are SO MANY people who are considered medically overweight that are by all other metrics perfectly healthy, but their doctors aren't satisfied until they're under a certain BMI, even if that results in muscle loss, anemia, etc.; fat people are uniformly treated worse for doing the exact same things as skinny people (eating, sweating, shopping, existing), to the extent that they are on average paid less for doing the exact same job as a thin person

anecdotally, I've noticed that the people on here who acknowledge this and work to combat internalized fatphobia (no 'fat inspi', no using fat folks as a comparison in 'unkind inspi', no making fun of other people to motivate yourself) often seem to have better mental health than the folks who indulge in it; reacting negatively, even in your own head, to someone simply existing while fat just keeps your brain full of negativity, which, we have a famous phrase relating to that sort of thinking: 'if shame worked, it would have worked already'

your 'why' can't just be 'to not be fat'; there's nothing wrong with being fat, and in plenty of situations it's even beneficial for your health

which, to circle back, alllllllll of my relatives, every 'mainstream' adult I've heard talk about traditional eating less culture (excuse me for avoiding potential no-no words) with their no breakfast/only nuts for lunch/pull the crust off bread/whatever 'rules' or branded eating plans, all of them are only trying to not be fat

and all of them are failing at it

to be 'successful' at what we are doing, you must be clear on how our goals are not to be healthy and knowingly, consistently engage in unhealthy habits, all the while pretending that you totally aren't doing that and everything is fine

we really don't want to encourage anyone to be like us, because we want them to be happy without restrictions; we just know that once you're in here, you know there are advantages (attention, kindness from strangers, improved salary, being listened to by doctors, getting gendered correctly, and more) to be claimed by sacrificing that happiness in specific ways, and we will unashamedly share those specific ways with each other

[futurebird]

Eating Disorders and Definitions

An Eating Disorder is a mental illness that has a life-altering negative impact on your ability to eat in a way that keeps your body healthy. Disordered eating can result in unhealthily low *or* high weights-- but how much you weigh isn't what determines if your eating is "disordered" -- what's key is how you think about food and eating and how you see your body. Eating disorders aren't glamorous and generally really suck. Getting an eating disorder isn't a short cut to being skinny.

What is an "unhealthy weight?" Most people will point to BMI as a way to determine what weights are healthy for a given height, but BMI is just a very general guideline and should not be treated in a rigid way. It's possible to be over a BMI of say 21 and still underweight for your body. It's possible to be a world class athlete and "overweight" on the BMI chart. Instead of focusing on BMI focus on if your weight is inhibiting your ability to physically do the things that matter to you in life. How much physical activity do you need to feel alert during the day and sleep well at night? Are you always exhausted and drained? Maybe you need more or less food. And, of course, talk to your doctor about these things. Thoughts such as "I want to be skinny so badly that I don't care if I have a mental disorder" *are* classic eating disorder thinking. It's the most ED thing ever to say. You should not want to have any kind of mental disorder if you can help it-- it's totally possible to brainwash yourself into an ED but it's not an effective way to loose weight and you could just as easily gain weight (through binges) or most likely stay the same as you are now --the only difference? Now you are miserable! Thing is, I don't think that most people with EDs end up like that because they just wanted to look skinny for the first day of school then got carried away and "ended up" with an ED. It would be nice if that were true since we could simply show everyone the facts and talk all ya'll out of doing this. But, I know it's not really that simple. EDs are physical manifestations of unreasonable and toxic pressures placed on young people (most often young women) -- sometimes from family, friends, coaches, etc. These pressures aren't always about weight, it could just be pressure to get good grades, or to be a perfectly kind and loving person without any emotional flaws. EDs can come from the feeling that the world is trying to stuff you into a box and you just don't fit. I saw a post the other day from some kid talking about "I don't think I deserve to post about EDs because I'm too fat" that's some meta-level ED thinking right there. But, this kid thought she didn't "qualify" as "disordered" since when you have "ED brain" weight is the filter for all things in life. And you are always being measured and falling short. I know this will be impossible for anyone with an ED to believe but in reality how much you weigh isn't that important to other people and has a limited impact on your life. You are fixated on it so it feels like it has this huge impact, but that just isn't really how it works. And maybe at some level you might know this? I've found that most (but sadly not all) people with EDs don't really hate fat people. If you do hate fat people you should work on the prejudice it's -- ugly. But what's more typical is a kind of massive double standard. Your fat friend can be lovable and beautiful and fat, but if *you* are fat then you suck. Spend some time considering how little sense that makes. Do you want to be a jerk who judges people by the most superficial of qualities? A conformist who just buys in to whatever advertisements and the most shallow men claim matters? Why is it fair to treat your friends and family with respect, to love them no matter what size they might be --but this can't apply to you? No you can only be loved if you weigh the right amount. Why do you get your own set of extra nasty rules?

[hoghtastic]

“I swear, at this point she’s just like a stalkerish fangirl following everyone who’s remotely associated with him… 😅”

I mean, that is his girlfriend? It’s not that weird that she would follow people that’s close with him I’m sure she’s met them more than once in the almost 10 months they’ve been together. (Because we know he’s always with his friends, even though he doesn’t post it as much) y’all are always saying something about every little thing she does when most of the time you’re not even right about what you say, it’s just speculations (none of it is fact, you have all created this whole fake personality for her and you don’t even know her for real?) it’s weird as fuck. You’re just making speculations solely off of the fact that you don’t like her and you feel some kind of way just because she’s with Alex. When someone points that out, you circle right back around to the only 3 solid reasons you (might) have for not liking her. And the main one is the “you snooze you lose” post (which you even admitted yourself that you all could still possibly be wrong about that being targeted towards fans because it “could be an inside joke that they had that she didn’t mean to post on the main one”. Hence why after she deleted it she added a post to the private. Because it was actually meant to be private?) after that you all just started picking at every little thing she did after that and taking it personally as if she’s sending some kind of secret diss to you all, simply because you’re his fans. Y’all sound crazy as hell and then wonder why he’s stopped posting as much and why he stopped wanting and allowing for people to be tagged him in stuff as much when he hangs out with people, because y’all don’t know how to respect his privacy. Y’all go and search on his friends accounts for any sighting of him (and if you’re not doing it yourself you repost what other people found, like reposting a story form the bar opening of the back of his head, just because it’s Alex. and it was posted on and account of someone I’m pretty sure he doesn’t even follow?) and then complain about the fact that “he’s a liar” and that “he says he wants privacy but then does the complete opposite by doing this and that” but you guys are the ones that go and invade said privacy, like he’s obviously pulled away from instagram more because of you guys. Because of the constant hate towards anything he does that doesn’t cater to you. It’s insane.

Alright anon, first of all, thanks for adding to the discussion. But before we can continue, please:

Because the way you sound so triggered over what a bunch of people speculate online about Johanne makes it look like you're either Johanne herself or someone really close to her (and also something else you mentioned, but we'll get to it). So, let's see:

You say that it's not weird because she's his girlfriend. Well, I'd say that it is. A couple can have a common circle of friends, obviously, but they certainly had other friends before meeting each other and/or will make new friends in other environments their significant other isn't a part of. And that's perfectly fine! Just because people are dating they don't become conjoined twins, they don't need to be together 24/7 and spending some time apart with other people doing different activities is healthy! One doesn't need to know and automatically become friends with everyone who is a friend/acquaintance or remotely related to their partner! And that's actually what we've been witnessing. Not all of the people she followed are actually close friends of Alex, some are just in the same field of work or crossed paths at some point, and she still had to follow them right away. And then you say that "she’s met them more than once in the almost 10 months they’ve been together". Taking Lucas as an example, why wasn't she following him before then? And only did last weekend after the bar opening? One would say they only met that evening and she didn't lose an opportunity to make another famous acquaintance and enmesh herself even more in Alex's circle. Also kudos for knowing the exact date they started dating.

You claim that we're always making speculations about her and that we don't know her for real. That part is true, I don't know her. But do you? If yes, please enlighten us and tell us why we're all so wrong about her. Because, personally, I'm not making speculations "solely off of the fact that I don’t like her" nor do I "feel some kind of way just because she’s with Alex". She's actually had some questionable attitudes which made me dislike her, and these weren't assumptions but facts — things that actually happened (not "might" have happened) and many people witnessed them (please refer to this post if you care about reading them, as I don't like repeating myself). And no, the "you snooze, you lose" incident isn't even the main reason. Stealing another person's artwork, making it pass as her own, and then pretending it didn't happen instead of acknowledging her mistake is. And I would have found this behavior really problematic whether it had come from Johanne or from any other person, regardless of whoever they were dating.

And while we're still speaking of the "you snooze, you lose" post, how can you be so certain that it was posted to her private account after she deleted it from her main one? Unless you're some kind of hacker, Johanne herself or someone close to her who actually follows said account? Or are you just speculating like everyone else here? Because if it's the latter, then you shouldn't be referring to us as "ya'll" as if you're any better, then.

While I agree that stalking Alex's friends looking for the smallest sight of him can be annoying to these people, most of them actually tag him in their stories, as if wanting a repost or at least some attention. And it's undeniable that a few people close to him have done it in the past. While others have set their accounts to private and/or avoid tagging him. But just for the record, all the content you'll see posted here comes from public accounts, as I believe stealing content from private accounts is wrong. And if I ever repost something (either from another blog, or something that people submitted) and you know that it was private, by all means let me know.

And by the end of your ask, I believe you're mixing things up. No one is saying that he's a liar about wanting privacy just because he hangs out with friends and is tagged partying with them, or takes part in public events (be it movie premieres, charity events or product launchings). People were just taken by surprise about him being so adamant on keeping his private life private for the past few years, but then suddenly exposing his relationship the way he has, either in the press or by having friends recording and reposting a birthday party, for example. And then him tagging his exact locations while on holidays. Just little things that don't match with being a very private person. In conclusion, it’s not about people digging online to find things about him, it’s about Alex himself being inconsistent in the way he handles his own privacy.

And last but not least, no one is hating on him. People are free to support and like a person, and still dislike and/or disagree with some of their attitudes. No one is perfect, anyway. But we're all entitled to our own opinions, which is exactly what we've been sharing here, in a way that isn’t harming or offending anyone. And believe me, if we were all “haters” this blog wouldn’t even exist in the first place, as I believe people have better things to do with their time than waste it with things they don’t even like. Which makes me wonder why you’re here? Clearly you don’t agree with what we’ve been doing here and you sent a whole ask criticising us for it, and what opinions we might have, but didn’t actually share your own. You defended Johanne, and while I gave you valid reasons as to why a lot of us dislike her, you failed to provide yours for actually liking her as a person and thinking we’re all wrong. So by all means, you’re more than welcome to add to the discussion and do so. Otherwise, you can always find other blogs whose content is more to your liking.

Either way, thanks for sharing your thoughts once again. Have a lovely day! 😊✨

[hekate1308]

Leaves That Before The Wild Hurricane Fly, A Destiel Advent Calendar, December 16

Masterpost

Read it on AO3

Castiel couldn’t deny that he was rather nervous the next morning. Aside from Crowley’s visit, all his forays into the world (for lack of a better word) of creatures had been with Dean, and he really didn’t know Sam and Eileen all that well. He knew Sam was a Fae – of course – and that Eileen and magic, but that was about it.

Still, he walked to Sam’s law office and was greeted enthusiastically by Sam, who actually opened the door himself. “No need, Kevin” he called out to the receptionist, “I got it. Come in, Cas.”

He once more could have corrected him but chose not to for reasons he himself did not understand.

“Mr. Lumes should show up soon. He is making another will. His fourth so far this year.”

Since Castiel had had little experience in such matters, he asked, “Is that unusual?”

“Not in this case. He’s a phoenix, they always make new wills in case they burn up.”

“Oh.”

“Don’t worry, nine times out of ten, they come out as basically the same person, but they like to make sure.”

He nodded again and allowed his gaze to wander over the office. As he had expected, there were quite a few plants.

Sam chuckled ruefully. “Yeah, you probably guessed that, but… oh, what do I say, Dean told you about that time in college, didn’t he?”

“He might have mentioned something.”

“I was young and thought I could go against my vey nature. I probably could, honestly – but it would require far more research than just deciding I don’t need any part of nature around me. Well, I learned my lesson, even if Dean still shows up to make sure I treat them right."

After he’d offered Castiel a seat and coffee, he added, “So Dean tells me you met Bridget. She can be a bit forceful when she puts her mind to it.”

“She was perfectly pleasant. She just told me to be careful since I don’t know much about creatures yet…”

Sam cleared his throat even though he’d sounded perfectly healthy so far and said, “Yes. Of course. Because – creatures. And magic. Yes. Anyway, Mr. Lumes should be about to arrive – you understand, of course, if a client doesn’t agree that you should sit in –“

“I’ll leave the room” he assured him; unlike many of his colleagues, Castiel and always understand that there were some lines one shouldn’t cross.

Sam nodded. “Alright, then.”

Mr. Lumes, once he appeared had no problem with Castiel sitting in and even supplied him a long and colourful history of the wills he had made so far, and why Sam was the “perfect” lawyer for “this kind of thing”. “He gets it, you know. There are some things he can’t help, and this is something I  can’t help – the burning up, I mean. We always take care, though – we normally can tell that it’ll happen in the next hour or so, so we can make sure no one gets hurt. You be sure to mention that.”

He assured him that he would.

“That’s good. But then, I didn’t expect anything else – Dean said you were alright.”

He was starting to suspect that Dean Winchester knew every single inhabitant of The Quarter personally, and they had all run Castiel’s involvement by him just to make sure. He was surprisingly alright with it because he knew it wasn’t done maliciously – on the contrary, he was just trying to make sure everyone he loved, or at the very least knew, stayed safe.

The day passed in a steady stream of meetings like the one with Mr. Lumes, interspersed with visits from Crowley, which Sam clearly wasn’t happy about but chose not to comment, while the demon claimed he was just “Looking out for Feathers here”.

Somehow, even that made Castiel feel more like a part of their group. He knew that this wasn’t a good idea – not if he wanted the article to sound truly neutral and observant, rather than a fluff piece – but so far, he had utterly failed to find any warning signs, and instead come to know a somewhat incoherent but still friendly group of people who simply tried their best to live their lives, just like anyone else; and who could blame them for that?

Dean picked him up from Sam’s office, of course. “Hey, Cas.”

“Hello, Dean.”

“And, you and Sam have fun?”

“It was very informative.”

“Glad to hear it. Dinner?”

He nodded.

“Great!” and they got onto Dean’s car which he was – rather against the odds since he was one of the Fae – rather attached to. “That’s Baby. The only good thing Dad ever gave me.”

“Oh.”

“Don’t worry about it”. He winked at him. “So where would you like to go?”

Anywhere as long as it is with you, he somehow managed not to say.

[editoress]

the gay pirate flag show~, legend of zelda, unsounded, suitor armor, star wars + pick your poison

From this most dangerous ask prompt. Salt for each under the cut. Half thoughtful attention to my favorite medias and half proof that I'm simply contrary.

Our Flag Means Death

5. Has fandom ever ruined a pairing for you?

Sadly, fandom has largely trashed my appreciation for Steddyhands (the ot3, you know). When I first saw it, I was instantly intrigued! They looked so happy; I wanted to know more! But the majority of what I found at the time was 'perfectly healthy Ed/Stede where they have to housetrain that awful Izzy,' and that was such a turn-off. I have found just enough good content since that I don't immediately scroll past the stuff, but it remains dire out here.

19. What is the one thing you hate most about your fandom?

It's the deadly combo of the way people make Izzy out to be the very devil with the way they make BLACKBEARD out to be an uwu sad boy who can't help his own actions. This comes as a package deal more often than not, and I can't stand any of it. Can't they just be a couple of homicidal assholes?

Legend of Zelda

16. If you could change anything in the show, what would you change?

This Hylia and Demise stuff? Would be gonzo. Wind Waker probably had one of the best, most heartbreaking approaches to the cycle, and I want to keep canon along those lines. Less ancient spirits manifesting as people to duke out their cosmic battle. More people born into roles they struggle to understand and resist. Zelda as a smart woman who questions her own destiny. Ganondorf as a Gerudo, in a way where that context informs his actions, not where he's just some incarnated demon disguised as a Gerudo.

Unsounded

13. Unpopular opinion about XXX character?

DUANE ADELIER FUCKS. HE FUCKED THEN AND HE FUCKS NOW. AND I WOULD FUCK HIM

11. Is there an unpopular character you like that the fandom doesn’t? Why?

Probably all of them. Cope just makes baller characters that I love to see, excepting the occasional 2D hate-target like Starfish. In particular: people can't wrap their minds around Bastion's mad scientist morality, but the fact is he's fantastic both as a character and as an entertaining, badass drama queen; and several people got nasty at Leysa for remarrying, but she ALWAYS has my full support. She's always done what makes sense for her, and she is full of love.

Suitor Armor

7. Is there anything you used to like but can’t stand now?

Honestly? The protagonist is on thin ice. And it's not because she's a bad character; I'm having a great time writing Lucia in my ongoing fic. It's the protagonist bias in the story. We get so few scenes away from her, because only what Lucia does matters, yet she does so little. It's a slow court romance story. Not a lot of plot. Which is fine, but it means following one person around gets boring, and giving a single person all the narrative weight in a fantasy court setting is a weird move. Most of all, I'm getting impatient with the way the narrative supports everything she does as absolutely correct, no consequences to be found.

23. Unpopular character you love?

The villain, of course! Every single time he shows up, I think of the line, "Have you thanked a villain for your plot today?" He's fun. He has style. But most importantly, he's carrying the plot on his back and I'm grateful for some juicy conflict in between the scenes of pining. A lot of fans hate him because they think a cartoon guy should be judged on real life morality. You've seen the type of fan

Star Wars

6. Has fandom ever made you enjoy a pairing you previously hated?

I never hated Reylo, but fandom definitely cannonballed me from casually liking it to actively, deeply enjoying it. 99% of my dash became utterly obnoxious whining about how Reylo, the basic baby's first enemies-to-lovers, was scandalously abusive, etc. Out of annoyance, I really dug into the themes and AUs, and I super enjoyed myself!

10. Most disliked arc? Why?

If I ever meet Dave Filoni and His Cronis, they will all pay for the pacifist Mandalore arc.

[searenbound]

Is it healthy to be this obsessed with my own work? Good question, moving on. Here’s some bully Bakugou redeeming himself via fucking you like he’ll die if he doesn’t. Based on this ask from @blaize-hewwo. I’m also gonna tag @pervysenpaix because I just think you might like it 👉🏼👈🏼 hope that’s ok with you 👉🏼👈🏼

Warnings: bullying, toxic relationship turning into a healthy one, vaguely described/implied punch from reader, degradation kink, oral(male receiving), vaginal fingering and sex, afab and fem reader, unprotected sex, pet names used (princess, doll), swearing, hair pulling, written with chubby reader in mind, quirkless au because why not?

Pairing: Katsuki Bakugou x reader

Ask him and he’ll tell you he’s the best at everything. Best in class, best at whatever stupid sport he was using to pass his time, best damn drummer you’ll ever hear. Simply the best, but of course he’s not a god, no matter how badly he’d like to think himself as one.

Even he had to be at something and of course he was. He’d never admit it out loud, would honestly rather die instead, but Katsuki Bakugou has no fucking clue how to talk to women.

He wasn’t sweet and flirtatious like his friend Kaminari. Wasn’t as charismatic and charming like a lot of people found Kirishima to be. Not nearly as laidback and fun to be around as Sero.

If it wasn’t for desperate women who chased him for clout he’d probably be completely clueless, but pussy is pussy and it’s not like he cared enough to pass up a effortless fuck when he wanted some.

He would of been fine with this arrangement. Perfectly happy to never get attached and navigate actually getting to know a girl, but she had to ruin that when she transferred in.

Pretty face with beautiful eyes and plump pouty lips, round cheeks that he wanted to squeeze and pinch until they squealed. Plush looking body he wanted to feel pressed against his muscular one so badly it almost hurt. He was disgustingly obsessed and at first she didn’t even give him the time of day.

Never paying him mind or even looking at his general direction. It pissed him off.

He had no idea what he’d even say if she talked to him. No clue how to get her attention for that matter and he didn’t get why it angered him so much but he was certain that was on her. That’s probably why he lashed out at her.

Grabbing a handful of hair and yanking her back, hissing that she was in his way and threatening her when she spoke up. He intended on never looking her way just like she’d been doing to him, only for the third or fourth time to pull a new reaction that had him straining against the fabric of his pants.

He yanked a little too roughly one day, knocking her head into the desk with a soft thud and pathetic whimper. He glanced at her ready to hiss out a insult about her being too sensitive and was confronted with her dazed and confused expression. Eyes glossy with unshed tears, lower lip quivering and breathing heavy enough he could clearly note the rise and fall of her breast.

For half a second he was speechless, thoughtlessly even, but soon enough he was more venomous. Crueler then ever as his fingers tightened and yanked her back again after allowing her to sit back up, filth spilling from his lips in a harsh whisper.

“You’re so fuckn’ pathetic Princess. You cry like a stupid little attention whore over what? Didn’t even hurt ya’ did I? Worthless pathetic little—”. “I-I’m n-not—” she’d try to defend herself but he was always quick to cut her off again “Aww you gonna cry? Go on cry for me dumb slut”.

They never gave him the satisfaction, always managing to run from him leaving him frustrated and and in need of the nearest private area to elevate his problem he blamed solely on how beautiful she looked. So desperate for him, at least he liked pretending that was the case.

He knew it was pretty fucked, how he treated her. The person he hoped to make (Yn) Bakugou someday probably shouldn’t be so terrified by him. So the day he attempted to corner her, hoping to feel her soft and squirming body pressed against him while he hissed vulgarities into her ear only to have his nose broken while she shouted him down was disturbingly alluring to him.

Cock throbbing and nose gushing while she read him for filth was probably the worst time to realize you’re in love sure, but it didn’t change the fact he knew for certain he wanted to make her his.

First step apologize for being such a dickhead. How does he do that though? He could offer her something maybe? Take her somewhere to try and make up for it?

“You could just tell her you’re kinda shitty at social stuff” Kaminari had offered as advice, and ultimately ended up with a book thrown in his face and whining about how he was right. He had a point though, as much as he hates to admit it, she was far too kind hearted not to give him a second chance if he told her he realized how shitty he was being and offered to try and make things right between them.

Fast forward six months, and he still doesn’t feel he’s earned her forgiveness that came so easily. He refuses to believe the sweet giggles he receives are genuinely because he made her laugh. The tight hugs that left no room between them weren’t anything special for a friend to receive. The gorgeous smile that haunts his late night thoughts wasn’t unique to him, but it didn’t stop him from rutting up into his hand every time he thought of her when he should’ve been asleep.

He never got over that feeling of wanting, but he felt he matured enough to know it was his problem and not hers. He was holding them both back clingy to his fantasies so he confessed one night just to get his rejection and subsequent moving on process over with.

“You mean that? It’s not a joke right?”.

“The hell kinda asshole says shit like that as a joke? I wasn’t that fuckin’ bad!” he huffed opening his mouth to say something else only to be ambushed with a hug and squealing excitement. Happy tears welling up in her eyes as she told him how she felt.

He was over the moon, teasing her about how easily she cries and kissing her soft lips for the first time. His hands wondering over her body, kneading at her flesh gently and groaning when she decided to drop to her knees.

This was moving fast, he should stop her and ask if she really wants this. Easier said than done when she was looking up at him as she bobbed her head. Whining at the familiar hissed out swear and hand tangled in her hair. She placed her hands against his thighs to stable herself, moaning around him when he praised her “Shit, Doll you look so damn good on your knees for me”.

She pulled back panting and trying to catch her breath before speaking “You think so? My ex used to tell me I looked gross like this, said I—” “whatever bullshit the bastard said was wrong” he growled out, cupping her cheek before continuing “you’re fucking gorgeous (Yn) fucker was blind not see it”.

He grunted in pleasure when she responded with paying attention to his dick again, suckling at the tip and stroking the length of his thick shaft “L-listen, fuck you’re good at this, you don’t gotta, gotta do this if you don’t wanna Doll”.

“I want to!” she snapped up to look at him, hand never slowing as she spoke “I want to really, b-but um… do you… c-can you call me those mean things you used to?”. He blinked at her, slowly realizing she wants him to be mean before snorting.

“You’re fuckin’ with me aren’t ya’? You want me to call you a stupid slut?”.

“M-maybe not stupid, but I kinda like the way it sounds when you call me—”.

“Open your mouth for me, nice and wide. A pretty little whore like you knows how to do that right?”. He would have laughed at how immediate the response was, but he was a bit busy tossing his head back and knotting his fingers in her hair, hissing in pleasure and tightening his grip on her hair.

If he was supposed to hold back, he was failing that task spectacularly, his hips rolling into her mouth. Grunting when she reached a hand up to play with his balls. There was no way he could prolong this, it felt way too damn good not to give into his selfish desires. “S-shit Princess, I’m gonna, fuck gonna cum” he hissed out, feeling her whining around him and gently nuzzling against his thighs as he came down her throat.

He barely caught his breath before ordering her up with a surprisingly calm “Get on the bed”. He watched in satisfaction as she quickly stripped everything she was wearing off before settling on her bed. Propped up on her pillows and legs spread, her perfect cunt on full display just for him.

“Just like that, that’s a good little slut for me” he groaned, watching her beam with pride.

Shuddering with anticipation when he settled himself on the bed. Gasping out a “F-feels a-amazing” when his fingers made quick work of pumping into her heated core.

“Does it? Should’ve guessed a shameless pretty little whore would like getting fingered by her bully huh?” he whispered against her lips before silencing her desperate cries with a kiss, curling his fingers and rubbing against her inner walls. “That’s not fair! Y-you sound so, so good when you talk like that, c-can’t help it if I get wet”.

“You really are fuckin’ shameless huh? can’t believe you were getting this wet for my cock even when I made life hell for ya, bet you thought about me fucking you stupid didn’t you?” he teased, watching as she tossed her head back, grinding herself into his fingers. “P-please I want it so bad I-I’m gonna c-cum”.

“Be a good slut and cum for me then “ he ordered, moving his fingers faster and kissing the tears that welled up away. Talking her through her orgasm and keeping her grounded as she shock and shuddered through it.

Once he was certain she was good to go he didn’t even hesitate, fingers digging into her thick hips as he thrusted in at just the right angle, her legs wrapping around his waist.

“Fuck” he groaned nuzzling into the side of her neck before pressing his lips to her forehead. She sighed contentedly at the quick moment of gentleness before he ruined her. Pinning her hands down to the bed as he rasped into ear, praising her for how well she took him while he fucked her into the mattress.

Sinking his teeth into the soft skin of her shoulder and eliciting a pretty little wimpier from her as he pounded into her harder. “God I love you, perfect little pussy takes this cock so well”. She moaned at the praise, squirming when his fingers rubbed teasingly slow at her clit, steadily picking up speed as he got drunk off the sounds she made.

“Is that good Princess? Is that what you need?” he groaned in her ear, his voice deep and husky. “Y-yes! Just like that!” (Yn) panted, moving her hands into his hair. “I-I’m gonna cum! P-please K-Katsuki I need to— emph” She begged, her words being cut off by him capturing her lips.

“‘M close too, cum for me ok?” he sighed fucking into her as if it’d save his life, whispering praise and sweet nothings to her, watching her trying to stay focused for him. Satisfaction washing over both of them when he pulled a loud keening moan of his name from as her orgasm finally washed over her, mumbling and muttering for him to finish in her. He didn’t even second guess it, pushing himself as deep as possible and rutting shallowly as he came.

[husbandograveyard]

A break - Vil x Reader

This was supposed to be another mini scenario but it got a little out of hand. So here’s a little full scenario with the fairest of them all. It’s a bit of a comfort fic. Enjoy, my loves. 

2nd person. genderneutral reader. No warnings 

It’s been a bad few weeks. You weren’t sure as to why you picked up so many things to do, but in between multiple clubs, homework assignments, extra tutoring, workouts, chores, and regular school duties, you were beyond exhausted. What was even worse, was that it was only gonna get busier, with exams coming up and people -especially freshmen- lining up for some extra tutoring just so they could pass their final exams. 

All of this was starting to take a toll on your body, and your general self-care routine. While it was expected of any Pomifiore student to look their best as often as possible, you hadn’t been able to do all the things you would usually do to keep yourself looking your best. Sure, you kept up with a healthy diet, although the regularity of it all was fading, as you just ate whenever you found the time for it. And sure, you had been doing your best to keep up with workouts, even though you scrapped one or two each week in favor of just one more hour of sleep because you were simply exhausted. 

Other than that though, you had pretty much cut out all your routine. You were glad to still upkeep basic hygiene, but elaborate skincare and perfectly coordinated outfits other than your uniform were nowhere to be seen. You couldn’t remember the last time you even deep-conditioned your hair or sat down to take care of your cuticles. 

And honestly, all that wouldn’t be too bad, but there was something else, or rather, someone else you had been avoiding all this time too. Your boyfriend, the Pomifiore dorm leader, was the one who had set most of the expectations and standards for how one should look after themself, and you were pretty sure you didn’t want to get scolded right now. If you wanted to spend time with him, it would be just to be in his arms for a while, to finally get some peace and quiet. 

But no, your endless to-do list only seemed to grow, any free minute you wanted to spend with him having to get dedicated to yet another tutoring or study session and you were growing so tired of it, counting down the days until this round of exams were over. 

You were in the library, trying really hard to get back into study mode after dinner. Usually, you’d have a little break, because right after eating you were feeling too drowsy to actually focus on your books. But you had to get at least three more chapters done before it was time for your chores, and by the time you were done with those, you probably would have to go to bed. 

You rested your head on your hand, propping it up and forcing yourself to stare at the pages below you, hardly absorbing anything that was on them. You were really trying though, and in all your focus you didn’t hear the familiar clicking of heels on the library floor approach. The chair next to you was quietly pulled away from the table, and it was only when a familiar voice spoke up quietly, that you noticed your boyfriend had taken place next to you. 

“Y/n, love, I have been looking for you ev-” Vil’s eyes grew a little wider when you looked up at him, and he was finally taking in your face. “You look absolutely terrible.” His voice was not as stern as you had thought it’d be, but that could also be blamed on the fact that you were still in the library. 

“Gee thanks Vil,” you said, rolling your eyes and focusing your attention back on the book in front of you. You missed him, sure, but you really didn’t want to deal with criticism right now, no matter how well-intended it may be. 

It was hard to focus on the letters on the page when they were no longer to be seen though. Vil had closed the book and placed a gloved hand on your arm, giving a slight squeeze and a nod of his head. The message was clear: come outside with me. 

You were reluctant to do so, but came up with a battle plan: if he were to start nagging, you’d just kiss him or hug him until he shut up. That would be a win/win situation: you’d finally have a much-needed moment with him, and you wouldn’t have to deal with any more negativity in your already overflowing brain. 

He took your books in one hand, your hand in the other. He set a steady pace, but not too fast that you couldn’t follow him. You intertwined your fingers with his, a stepping stone for the rest of your plan, and were surprised when he marched straight back to the dorm without really saying a word. That was not what you were preparing for. 

Once you entered his room, he let go of your hand and gestured for the bed. “sit, please.” You did as you were told, already missing the warm feeling of your hand in his. He took off his jacket and gloves and sat down next to you, carefully cupping your face in his hands. 

“Y/n, when is the last time you’ve taken care of yourself?” His brows were furrowed, but his eyes were filled with worry, not anger or annoyance as you were expecting. His thumbs rubbed your cheeks gently, and he was looking you straight in the eyes, his looks sending a painful signal straight to your heart. 

“I am sorry, I let you down… it’s just… there is so much to do, and everyone needs my help and…” you pulled your face back, looking down. You were stumbling over your words, trying to explain just why you hadn’t been keeping up, still finding excuses when Vil pulled you in for a hug, effectively rendering you quiet, much like you had originally planned to do. 

“Y/n, you could never let me down. Especially not when you’re working this hard. But you do have me worried,” he pulled back, studying your face again, “these dark circles, dry patches… your eyes look beyond tired and your hair is dull. You have been working yourself to death, dear. And while I appreciate your work ethic almost as much as I appreciate your presence, you have to take breaks, and you have to let someone know when it’s becoming too much.” He was quiet for a little while. “You have to let me know whenever it becomes too much. I can help. I will help.” 

You felt tears sting at the corners of your eyes. What had you been thinking? Sure, the fairest of them all would be keeping an eye on your looks, but he was your boyfriend and he loved you for more than just what was on the outside. You had been avoiding him in order to make sure you wouldn’t have to face any negative consequences from overworking, but while doing so, you had been facing nothing but more work, denying yourself any breaks to give you more energy to tackle the next things on your list. 

“I am so sorry Vil, dear, I didn’t mean to ignore you. I’ve missed you. It’s just- I still need to-” 

A gentle shushing sound rendered you quiet once again. 

“What is it you still need to do?” 

“Well… my chores, and at least three more chapters of-” 

“Okay. No more chores. No more studying today. You are in no state to properly study, and I will personally see to it that your chores get waived as long as you’re spending this much time tutoring other students, you are already doing more than necessary for this dorm.” 

“But-” 

“No buts. I want you to go to your room, get a nice warm shower. Wash your hair, put on something comfortable. I will be at your door in 45 minutes for some much-needed quality time and downtime.” 

“Are you sure?” 

“Of course I am.”  You were smiling now, hugging Vil again, feeling your body relax already, now that -at least temporarily- some weight had been lifted off your shoulders. You shared a brief kiss before retreating to your room to do exactly as he had told. 

The hot water of the shower helped tremendously to relax, while the feeling of freshness when you stepped out of the shower helped you feel like a brand new person. You put on some, clean comfortable clothes and felt a wave of tiredness wash over you. Only now you were feeling the damage you had been doing to your body by non-stop checking off items of your neverending to-do list. You were pondering how you could possibly tackle that the next time you were so overwhelmed, so you wouldn’t let it get to your body as much, when you were pulled out of your thoughts by a knock on your door. 

“It’s unlocked, come in” 

Vil entered quietly, carrying a bag that you immediately recognized as one of the storage bags for his endless supply of cosmetic products. 

“You’re already looking a whole lot better.” A small smile formed on his face as he motioned for you to move over to the vanity. You obliged, sitting down and looking up, laughing a little as he bent down to briefl capture your lips. “Now, I can’t have my love walking around looking like a potato, especially since you’ve been working so hard.” 

He was talking almost more to himself than to you. You felt your heart swell, and looked at him with nothing but love and adoration while he set down some bottles, vials, and tubes. 

“Now, close your eyes and relax. You need to be the one that’s taken care of for a change.” 

[whatifyoulivelikethat]

weird, m | ksj

pairing(s): seokjin x reader

summary: Your roommate and best friend, Kim Seokjin, forgot to double-check the autofill information and shipped his package from the online sex shop with your name on it. Naturally, this ends with you tying him up and sucking his dick, and him tying you up with you riding him like a wild animal. Wait, what?

warnings: rated M (18+) for language; friends with benefits; crack (sorry, I can't be serious for more than two seconds when writing Seokjin); yes, reader usually fucks younger dudes XD; smut (fem reader, D/s dynamics (both switches), bondage, m-receiving oral, thigh riding, cowgirl, spanking); non-idol!BTS - just two best friends fucking for sexual exploration, don't mind them

technically a prequel to love roulette, m | myg yes, this is the explanation to that mysterious package, but is it really an explanation or rather an excuse to fuck WWH, you decide

--

“Seokjin, can I ask you something?”

“Hm?”

When Kim Seokjin looked at you, it was a bit like looking into the eyes someone much younger than you even though he wasn’t. He had that youth about him, the ‘here’s-to-never-growing-up’ sparkle in his large brown eyes, complete with parted lips in a small ‘o’ and, alright, yes, his Nintendo Switch in his hands.

“A long time ago, I asked you which way you think you lean, more dominant or more submissive, no?”

His handsome face flushed pink, slowly scooting away from you.

“Er… yeah, I remember…”

“What?”

“Huh?”

You poked him and he squeaked, slapping a hand over his side even though he was wearing a brown sweatshirt. Seokjin was always cold, even during the summer.

Your best friend was an odd character.

You chuckled. “Why are you being so awkward? I thought we were over this phase.”

Well, he should be. You had known Seokjin since elementary school and seen him, er, date was a strong word for what you both were doing in middle and high school, more like being bumbling messes and walking in on each other bonking classmates, but, hey, what mattered is that you both got better at it over the years.

It being sex.

Not romance.

You both still had only sketchy ideas about what romance was supposed to be.

“We are,” your best friend coughed, clearing his throat for absolutely no reason. “We are, I just…”

“Used my name for purchasing goods from an online sex shop?”

He choked and nearly flung his Switch. You caught it, swiftly placing it on the coffee table as you procured the cardboard box from behind your back, already open, address and name circled in thick black permanent marker on the rather inconspicuous package.

“W-What, that’s absurd, why would I ever–?”

You hummed pleasantly, sweeping the box away from his lanky limbs and his flailing hands. For someone who didn’t purchase goods from an online sex shop, he sure was interested in getting the box. He tumbled into your lap, and quickly scrambled back, black hair suddenly fluffed and wild from the movement.

“Something tells me you didn’t check the autocomplete form before clicking submit.”

You saw Seokjin choke on air.

He jerked away from you and fumbled with his phone beside him. You peeked over his broad shoulder and saw that he was scrolling through his emails like a madman, except Seokjin had a bad habit of never deleting any. He had maybe fifteen thousand unread emails to sort though.

“You don’t have to check. I am sure I didn’t order red cotton bondage rope and a leather flogger.”

Seokjin whipped his head around, face redder than a tomato, looking halfway between fainting and screaming.

You raised an eyebrow. “Is it for you or a mysterious imaginary girl that you’re dating?”

Now your best friend seemed to be contemplating holding his own breath until he passed out to avoid your questioning.

“I-It’s not for me!”

“Oooh, then who? You’re not an internet hookup kind of guy though… unless she was dumb enough to put her full name as her username, then she’s too airheaded to be a catfish–”

Seokjin flapped his hands, smacking you in your pajama-covered chest, sputtering. “No one! There’s no one! I just…!”

You caught one of his wrists, raising an eyebrow.

“Just?”

He froze.

Silence.

“… Seokjin?”

You left go of his hand. It stayed there, frozen in the air.

Ah, it seemed as if his soul left his body.

Rest in peace Kim Seokjin. You were the handsomest best friend one could ask for.

You prodded him in the side again and Seokjin doubled over, trying to cover his face with the large sleeves of his sweatshirt, long legs in black sweatpants curling up as if he could cocoon himself away from the conversation.

“Seokjin, you can be interested in whatever you want,” you snickered, placing the package next to his fetal positioned body. “I simply thought it was funny that you accidentally used my name. Although I wouldn’t use that flogger on a real person, only for posing in pictures. In any case, have fun being freaky by yourself and not for some mysterious woman you refuse to tell me about.”

You stood up, about to leave and give your best friend some space. You shouldn’t go too far teasing him after all.

“What do you mean?”

You stopped, looking back. Seokjin’s large brown eyes were peeking out of his splayed fingers, shifting awkwardly when you made eye contact. He cleared his throat. He was doing that a lot for someone who seemed perfectly healthy ten minutes ago, shrieking at himself for missing the ledge in his game and dying.

It had seemed like a good time to interrupt and embarrass him so you could save your eardrums.

He coughed and pointed to the box. “About the… um… whip… thingmabob…”

You cocked an eyebrow. “Isn’t it obvious?”

You marched over and opened the box, making Seokjin jolt and cover his red ears instinctively, but you ignored him, pulling out the black pleather flogger you had already unwrapped from the plastic – purely from thinking it was your own package, by the way, no other reason, surely not because you were mildly curious about what your best friend was into, nope – and you slapped the short three tails into your hand, wincing.

“This kind of cheap material is too plastic-like. If you use this on bare skin and hit too hard, you’re going to cut someone and I know you’re squeamish around blood, unless you secretly have a blood fetish too and have been a really good actor all this time–”

“How do you know that?”

You blinked at his question.

“What?”

Seokjin sat up, giving you a confused pout. “Why do you know something like that?”

Now it was your turn to shift your eyes around.

“Uh…”

Er… how to tell your best friend that the younger guy you were casually fucking for the past couple of weeks was, ah, rather knowledgeable about certain things, was, um, interested in teaching, uh, yeah, teaching…

Seokjin squinted at you suspiciously. “Is it that idol trainee that was here two nights ago when I was out drinking with Hose–”

You waved your hands very quickly, tossing the flog aside carelessly and slapping your thigh to silence Seokjin and his far too invasive questions. “Look. I just don’t want you to hurt anybody on accident, okay? Your rope choice was good though. You should always use an organic material for shibari, cotton, hemp, linen if you’re rich, but you’re a cheapskate, so–”

Your best friend narrowed his eyes into slits. “How much younger is that guy compared to you again? Hm? And what was his name? Ye–”

You slapped a hand over Seokjin’s mouth, smiling sweetly and dangerously, reaching into the box and pulling out the red cotton rope.

“I know a lot of knots now and I can tie a noose just for you, Seokjinnie.”

Your best friend, rightfully so, looked terrified.

“Now. Let’s talk about you, okay? Okay.”

You removed your hand and held onto the rope.

Seokjin gulped, but then shook his head vigorously, frowning. “What did you call it?” He was already moving past your death threat. Smart man.

“Call what?”

“Shi-something?”

“Shibari? Japanese rope tying?” You lifted the cotton cord in your hand. “Is that not what this is for?”

Seokjin blinked very rapidly.

You blinked back at him. Then it dawned onto you. “The diamond-y rope patterns where they’re all tied up and stuff.”

“Ah! Yeah! That!”

“You want that done to you?”

Seokjin jerked to one side. “What? No! To someone else. Maybe. No. What?”

You slowly placed the rope on his lap and scooted away.

“Uh… huh. Okay. Enjoy.”

“Wait,” he blurted.

“What?”

“CanIpracticeonyou?”

“Can you WHAT?” you echoed shrilly.

“Right, yeah, okay, never mind–”

-

“Seokjin.”

Your best friend choked on his own toothbrush and threw himself into the bathroom wall, colliding into the towel bar and howling in pain while simultaneously hacking up a lung.

“I’ve decided I am going to teach you some simple knots to prevent me from having to pick your naked ass up from the police station or hospital,” you said calmly as Seokjin half-died on the floor tangled in your mint green and his navy-blue bath towels. “And because I don’t want to have to cut some poor girl off your bedframe because you’ve blacked out running onto your door trying to find me.”

“I’ve never–” he wheezed.

“But you will if I don’t take precautions,” you cut in, grabbing your purple toothbrush and putting toothpaste on it as Seokjin attempted to collect himself off the ground. “Like that one time you ran into the window when that wasp was in the apartment.”

“That was a fucking wasp, you freaked out too!”

You started brushing your teeth. “Yeah, but I didn’t knock myself out and wake up with a fat bump on my forehead. That was you,” you gargled.

“Ack…”

“Anyway, I know a few things and I figured I would do a good deed and enlighten you.”

“Who taught you? Was it Ye–”

You jabbed Seokjin forcefully in the ribs and he immediately shut up because he choked on his toothbrush again.

-

“Why do you have scissors?”

“For cutting the rope.”

“Yeah, but why are they so big?”

“That’s what she said.”

Seokjin narrowed his eyes. “I hate you.”

“Cool, now I’m gonna tie you up. Give me your hands.”

You unwound the end from the bolt and frowned, nudging his knee with yours. You were both sitting on his bed, him cross legged and you on your knees because he was wearing black sweatpants and you were wearing no pants, just your usual large lavender pajama shirt with a pattern of yellow stars.

“Take off your sweatshirt. It’ll get in the way.”

“But I’m cold.”

“You won’t be because apparently this shit turns you on,” you snickered.

“Shut up, it does not. It’s the other way around,” Seokjin grumbled, yanking his chocolate brown sweatshirt over his head.

You paused.

“I thought you were more sub.”

Seokjin froze, head half-out of his sweatshirt. You waited. He didn’t move. You waited some more. He coughed and chucked the article of clothing aside, yanking his white t-shirt down and smoothing his hair, not looking at you.

You waited.

He smoothed his hair for a full two minutes.

“Um, anyway–”

You planted a hand on his knee and Seokjin tried to chop your hand away, only for you to snatch his wrist, so his other hand came up to stop you, but you wound the end of the rope around his wrist and bounced off his mattress, pinning your knees on top of his knees and making him squeak as he tumbled back into his pillows, bringing you with him. You had to jerk your head out of the way to avoid collision.

“My nuts!”

“I didn’t hit your precious nuts, you numbsku–”

Hang on.

You locked eyes with Seokjin under you, who gawked back at you, absolutely terrified.

“… You are still a sub.”

Seokjin winced. “Ugh, it’s just… I’m getting older, alright? I can change my mind…”

You could get off him. You could let it be. You totally could.

But were you going to?

No.

You straddled his abdomen and brought his hands to his chest with a big grin. Seokjin’s eyes turned into giant brown saucers. He looked ready to pass out and not from your weight because you weren’t putting much weight on him.

“W-W-What are y-you d-doing?!” he shrieked.

You rapped him in the forehead. “Teaching. Pay attention. Hands up.”

“You aren’t taking your rings off?”

He was referring to the three silver rings you wore on a daily basis – an onyx stone on your left middle finger, a goat-head shaped ring on your right thumb, and a skull with a jester hat on your right ring finger.

You raised an eyebrow. “Why do I need to take them off?”

He lifted his hands and gave you an exaggerated shrug in between your thighs. Come to think of it, Seokjin had a rather broad chest so you had to spread your legs pretty wide to accommodate and hover over him.

Precarious.

“Ah, perfect.”

Your best friend yelped as you wrapped the rope around his wrists, leaving the end sticking out between them, first focusing on loosely binding. He tried to break away, but you harshly squeezed his sides with your thighs, narrowing your eyes.

“Stop squirming.”

He froze at your cold tone, shifting his eyes awkwardly.

“Watch. Now.”

His eyes immediately snapped to your hands.

“Wrists together.” You nudged them so the inner parts of the wrists were touching. “A little space in the center,” you added, looping out the end of the rope. “I’m just teaching you how I learned it, there are a few ways, but the details are important so you don’t prevent loss of circulation,” you added seriously, waiting for him to nod before continuing. “So, wind it around a couple times, but don’t overlap. Four or five?”

“But I can still get out.”

You glared at him. Seokjin shut up and jammed his plush pink lips together, shaking his head rapidly as if to say, who me? I wasn’t talking!

“Turn it ninety degrees like this,” you demonstrated. “And start going perpendicular to and in between the wrists to create the binding. Line up each coil side by side. Mind the starting end here. Then…” You reached for the scissors and snipped the excess away, dropping the rope and scissors beside you on the bed. “You tie it off on the outside. I use a square knot, so this end over this end, and then retie it the opposite way. Try to break free.”

Seokjin frowned at the red rope around his wrists, twisting it this way and that, squirming underneath your legs. You put your hands on your waist triumphantly, nodding to yourself in pride. You did a good job! It looked neat and it was inescapable without tightening on any blood vessels to cause any dangerous loss of circulation.

Hang on.

Seokjin froze.

You froze.

You both looked down.

You smacked him in the cheek.

“Ow!”

“What are you looking there for?!”

“Why did you hit me? Why do you always resort to violence?!” Seokjin accused, jabbing you underneath your breasts with his bound hands. “What is going on down there?”

“Nothing! Stop moving!”

“No!”

“You–”

You closed your thighs around Seokjin’s waist and sat down on him, causing him to gasp, wind knocked out of him as his diaphragm was pushed up into his lungs, struggling with the rope between his wrists and resorting to slamming them down on the bed above his head. You growled as you towered over him. He started yelling, as he always did.

“Yah!”

You slapped your free hand over his mouth.

“Silence.”

He glared at you behind your palm, breathing hard. You sat on top of him, breathing just as hard. He was bigger, strong, yes, but not in the position of power and – being honest, after all – your best friend was never really out to fight you and win. He was more of a ‘I’m-going-to-be-stupidly-annoying-until-you-do-what-I-want’ type, which made him rather childish in some ways. You were more of the ‘I’m-gonna-beat-your-ass’ type.

In conclusion, it was a healthy friendship.

Seokjin started licking your palm and making crazy eyes at you.

Your eye twitched.

“Stop it.”

Unsurprisingly, he did not, in fact, stop it.

“I said, stop it.”

And you slid down, past the wet spot now on his t-shirt, planting your soaked panties on top of his crotch, grinding down, and, yup, Seokjin bucked and yelped, immediately stopping and seizing up as if he could hide the massive erection that you had been willing to ignore but he was being a little – nah, actually, an extra-large, supersized – shit and it was getting on your last nerve, so what better way to resolve a wordless argument (on his part, heh) then humping his hard-on?

You removed your hand and Seokjin had a brief moment to gasp your name before you slid the pads of your fingers onto his tongue, rubbing it roughly and making his eyes nearly bulge out of his head.

“I told you to stop, but you aren’t listening,” you snarled.

Seokjin whimpered, brown orbs glassy, pupils blown out.

You stilled.

Hold on a second.

You had a brief epiphany where you realized you were grinding on your best friend’s dick with him tied up and you were wetter than the Yellow Sea. This wasn’t some guy you picked up at the night market that won you that sleeping Pikachu at the claw machines, only to chat him up and end up with bed with a guy who was – ack, never mind his age – anyway, this was your best friend.

Kim Seokjin.

Oh shit, I’ve gone too far.

You let go, backing up. “S… Sorry, I–”

But then Seokjin’s plush lips closed around your fingers, sucking hard and you choked slightly, feeling his hips roll and the tip of his clothed erection hit your covered clit. He was glaring at you. You gasped as his teeth gently but firmly caught your two fingers. It did hurt, but only a little. Mostly it sent a rush of rather uncomfortable and mind-boggling arousal racing from your knuckles to your core, drenching your panties further.

“Don’t stop,” he mumbled around your fingers.

Don’t stop?

DON’T STOP?

His teeth let go, panting, staring into your eyes.

“Don’t make this weird,” Seokjin muttered, shifting his gaze. “Don’t make this weird, okay?”

His brown eyes flickered back to you. His bound hands were still over his head, black hair flaring out of his pillows, white t-shirt messed up, still trapped between your thighs. You paused, fingers slipping out of his lips, the pads trailing on his lower lip, turning it glossy with his saliva.

Your heart was racing fast.

He furrowed his dark brows and, for the first time, his serious expression made you think that perhaps, maybe, there was a side of him down there, the other side to the coin.

“I just…” Seokjin exhaled slowly, not looking away from you. “I trust you to do this. You’re capable and knowledgeable. I know you are. Word gets around with your, er, habits with younger guys…”

You felt your cheeks heat and you scratched your head awkwardly.

“Anyway, it’s fine if you wanna… er… get off. With me. Because I’m so handsome and all.”

You were thiiiiiiis close to leaving out of sheer embarrassment that instantly dissipated at Seokjin’s sudden unexpected self-compliment. Instead, your eye twitched and you squinted in annoyance.

Seokjin coughed, ears singeing bright red. “Unless you can’t, of course. Because it’s easy to fall in love with me, and that would be very bad considering I don’t want to marry you–”

“I don’t want to marry you either,” you snapped. “You’re ugly.”

Seokjin gasped dramatically, highly offended. “How dare you–!”

He abruptly sat up and you twisted back, only for his arms to swing over your head and sandwich you between his tied wrists and his chest, ramming you back onto his lap and his hard dick. You hissed and bit down your moan, not willing to admit it was mildly turning you on, because of course neither you or Seokjin hated each other – only in that classic way best friends hate and love each other at the same time – and, yeah, sure, you could admit Seokjin was handsome and cute and fun to be around, but he wasn’t the one, not that you knew what the one was supposed to feel like or knew if you would ever feel such an intense, romantic love, but you had this strange idea that the one for you would be someone who could understand you on a different level, and you didn’t have that with Seokjin even if you did talk all the time. You were quite sure the feeling was mutual and now, looking into his brown eyes with a scowl, you saw that the feeling was indeed mutual.

Also, Seokjin was an immature shithead.

A loveable, worldwide handsome, immature shithead. Redeemable.

Still.

You were horny.

And Seokjin was horny.

You weren’t going to date Seokjin ever, but your best friend was hot as hell and you could definitely bang him without any regrets.

“Let’s fuck,” he breathed into your face.

You raised an eyebrow.

“Don’t make it weird.”

Don’t make it weird, yeah, okaaay dude–

Your thoughts were suddenly cut off when Seokjin kissed you.

His forearms closed in behind your back and he pressed his bound wrists into your shoulder blades, pushing you into his solid chest and his embrace, taking your breath away. He always had good hugs, even if they were just to comfort you when your favorite flavor of ice lollys stopped being stocked at your local grocery store – still tragic to this day – and even when he was clinging onto you like a howling monkey because a cockroach was in the bathroom and he was screaming at you to kill it and nearly blowing out your eardrums, even then…

Now.

You closed your legs in around his hips and rolled your crotch into him, suddenly kissing him back.

He gasped into your mouth, your eyes half-opening, him gazing back at you, long lashes and dark eyebrows and glowing tan skin, holy shit, your best friend was handsome as fuck, why did other men even try when Kim Seokjin existed?

“Are you falling in love with me because I’m so handsome?” Seokjin teased, nipping at your lower lip.

Your eye twitched. Oh, yes, that’s right, because you’re annoying.

You shoved him and he yelped, clutching your back as you both fell onto the bed with a flump! You slid out from under his arms, skin prickling at Seokjin’s involuntary whine at your departure. Don’t make this weird, yeah, okay, don’t turn me on this much, dumbass, you are reminding me of… You pushed the thought away.

You didn’t want to think about other people when the person you were touching was right in front of you.

“What are you – yah!”

You gripped the waistband of his sweatpants and yanked down, exposing his underwear – bright blue, nice, nice – and his clothed erection, leaning in, hot breath ghosting over it, Seokjin jerking his arms about because he seemed undecided on either if he wanted to see or not see, but you let him deal with that in his own time, lowering your mouth, tongue extended, fingers splayed over his hips, silver rings glinting in his bedroom lights.

“You look like a demon,” you heard from above you.

You planted your tongue on the spot where the head of his cock would be and soaked it with saliva.

“F-Fuck!”

That shut him up real quick.

Your eyes drifted up, lapping slowly, barely stimulating the sensitive head through his underwear, closing your lips around it so the fabric clung wetly to the taut skin underneath. His cock swelled and twitched under your mouth; the action was mirrored by Seokjin’s jaw. He was clenching it along with his hands balled into fists, gasping for breath.

“O-Oh, f-fuck…!”

You were beginning to get the hint with each passing second of working your tongue around his rapidly hardening cock. Seokjin had put himself in the sub category when you asked back then because he liked to things being done for him. It was less about the mental aspect and more of the physical acts of service in his case. However, he wasn’t very good at articulating what he wanted and thus the natural pattern of someone just doing it led to, ah, exhibit A.

You currently parting your lips and letting your tongue snake out, coating the length with saliva.

But.

You could see it in his eyes, that burning intensity.

Maybe part of it was because it was you. He probably didn’t have those butterfly jitters of trying to woo a stranger or the nervousness of looking bad in the honeymoon phase of a relationship. There was already a level of comfort – and the ability to readily shit-talk each other at any moment – and so Seokjin was free to relax, even if it was a bizarre situation of sexual discovery.

“Take it off,” he growled.

Your fingers creeped up his sides, hooking over his boxer briefs. Slow, deliberate, kissing up his length, on the tightrope, dominant in your control, submissive in the action, raising your head so Seokjin could lift his hips, feathering kisses on the exposed skin and making him hiss and shudder, eyelids fluttering, slipping into subservience a little.

At the end of the day, who killed the unwanted bugs in your shared apartment?

Yeah, you.

“Oh, f… fucking shit…”

You tilted your head and ran your tongue up and down the length, licking up the sides and circling around the thick head, bordering on frustratingly soft, switching to wet, sloppy kisses when his hands raised, making him pause, gazing down at you curiously and attentively, entranced by the action. You ducked down, tongue slurping around his balls, lifting his cock, kissing, sucking, eyes closing, tip of your wet muscle drawing zig-zag patterns that soft skin.

Seokjin moaned your name.

A shiver of electricity went up your spine.

Alright, fine, you were getting turned on.

You wrapped your lips around his balls and enveloped them both with your mouth.

“Whoa!”

You opened your eyes to see Seokjin staring wide-eyed at you, hands straight up to stare at you between his upper arms. You almost laughed at the hilarious triangular-looking pose, but your mouth was currently full, so you restrained yourself.

“That’s possible?! You can put both nuts in your mouth at the same time?!”

Uh.

Where you supposed to respond with your cheeks stuffed with his nutties?

You hummed casually in response.

“A-Ah…!”

Seokjin gasped at the vibrations and the movement of your tongue slapping all over them, short, rapid licks all over his skin, watching him with a cocked eyebrow, but he didn’t even notice, hands dropping and moaning to the ceiling, his eyes closing and savoring the hot wet warmth and the power of your mouth, shivering as your hand slowly stroked his length in time with your tongue.

You let him bask in it before detaching and swallowing his cock.

“Gah!”

Seokjiinie, you thought wryly, we gotta work on your repertoire of sex sounds.

You spied him looking down at you, so you paused around the swollen head and slid your tongue out, circling and wrapping around his length while sucking on the tip and rubbing the back of your tongue along the underside.

Seokjin made a bunch of weird croaking noises that were, strangely, rather attractive. Okay, you could admit it. You were kind of a sucker for your best friend in the most platonic way possible… while in the middle of sucking his dick.

What?

He was handsome!

You began to bob your head up and down, tongue and lips descending, taking him deep so you kissed the base of his cock, head buried in your throat, waiting for him to glance down at you, hazy brown orbs under lush lashes, and you would peek your tongue out and lap at his balls, interrupting the tightness, causing him to swear and jerk his hips up, urging you to keep consistent speed and pace, all the while watching every single movement of your tongue. You kept this irregular pace, slow, then fast, then slow again when he looked at you, then fast when the ecstasy was too much and he closed his eyes, over and over. You could see that a battle was being waged Seokjin’s pretty head, between wanting to observe the lewdness of you licking his balls with his hard cock buried in your throat while also desperately needing to get to the fuck off.

“You… bitch… suck me off properly, fuck…”

You raised all the way so only the head was in your mouth and sucked, rubbing up and around it, swirling all over, teasing the slit and soaking the sensitive skin, rutting it against the roof of your mouth and Seokjin groaned, pressing his head back into the pillows, black hair covering his eyes, fists pressed to his chest.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, please, let me cum!”

His hips rammed up and you dug your nails into them, wincing as the head hit the top of your throat and slid down, cutting off your air, and then he began to thrust erratically, the position, inability to use his hands as leverage, and your resistance not letting him set up a good rhythm. You had to force him back down, popping your mouth off, snarling.

“I’m gonna gag if you do that! You want me to vomit on your dick or what?”

But all of a sudden Seokjin sat up again, grabbing your pajama shirt and yanking you to him, saliva dripping down your chin and then it was on his chin, a messy, savage kiss, ravenous need in his actions, pulling you to him, close, closer, you twisting and then gasping as he pushed one of your thighs down, planting your soaked panties on the exposed part of his thigh.

“Ah, Seok–”

He attacked your lips again with a light growl, sparks shooting across your skin, his thigh rising and bouncing you both on the bed, his legs still tangled in his pants and underwear but the effect was undeniable.

Seokjin was making you ride his thigh.

Whoa.

He bit your lower lip and sucked hard, your eyes fluttering closed, hips rocking, heat turning hotter, wet turning wetter, your sticky, sweet juices clinging to his upper thigh, your own pressed against his saliva-covered cock, wrapping your arms around him, close, closer, you thrusting your tongue in his mouth and him moaning before he did the same to you, starting a tug of war, rubbing harder against his skin, his muscle tensing against your covered clit, friction and wetness everywhere, too many clothes and no eye contact, one of your hands slipping into his black locks and tilting his head, deepening the kiss and inhaling his exhale, shuddering at the erotic nature of the moment.

He mumbled your name against your lips, still clutching your pajamas, stars bunched in his hands, fingertips pressed into the curve of your breasts.

“Can I try the rope tying now?” Seokjin whispered, voice gravelly and low.

-

“Excuse me?”

There was a ripped-open condom wrapper sitting on the bed.

“What?”

Your pajama shirt, bra, and panties were on the floor, along with Seokjin’s shirt, sweatpants, and underwear.

“Why are you – gah!”

You sucked in a breath as you sank down on his cock. Fuck, it was tight, tight as you lowered yourself onto his hips, Seokjin gasping and clutching the long length of red cotton rope that you had carefully untied from his wrists. You had even taken the extra step to massage them afterward, not that he needed it because of your careful work – good job, past you – but he appreciated it all the same, because deep down Kim Seokjin was a prince.

“Oh my God, you’re so tight, shit, shit, shit…”

You neglected to tell your best friend that you were both low-key proud of and turned on by your own ability to take dick without much foreplay. That little edge of tightness added just the right amount of spice of pain that amplified to the pleasure.

Okay.

And yes, you felt a special kind of glee as you witnessed Seokjin’s stunned shock and near passed-out expression from being inside you.

You held out your wrists and grinned. “Go ahead. Tie me up.”

Seokjin gawked at you like you had three heads.

You squeezed your breasts together with your upper arms, tilting your head with a devilish grin.

“God, you’re so hot, but you look crazy,” he wheezed.

Your grin dropped and your eye twitched. “Is that supposed to be a compliment or…?”

Seokjin shrugged, and moved your hands so they were in the better position for him. Much to your annoyance, he didn’t elaborate.

“Um, let’s see, you left a bit out to use as a tie and…”

You began to rock your hips.

“H-Hey!”

The side of your lips curved upward. “What? We’re multitasking.”

“We–?” Seokjin choked, gritting his teeth as you pulsed around his hard length, rolling your hips gently, adjusting until you found a comfortable spot so the head hit you in just the right spot, ah, yes, right there, spreading your fingers out over his chest, leaning your forehead against his, not quite going full force but a slow, deliberate rhythm that wasn’t going to make either of you cum, but, damn, did it feel good.

Seokjin shuddered, gasping your name.

“Tie me up, Seokjin,” you murmured back, caressing his skin.

His eyes darted up, saturated with lust, searching your eyes, and you gazed back.

You could be a real jerk right now.

His hot exhale washed over your lips, a shudder of nervousness.

But this was your best friend, and he was trusting you.

You tilted your head and kissed him softly, flush against his plush lips.

“Come on,” you nudged his nose lightly. “Do it.”

You viewed him from under your lashes. He shivered. Almost.

He needed only one more little push.

“Want you, Seokjinnie,” you breathed against his skin, hints of need and desperation in your voice.

A small smile danced on his lips, staring into your eyes.

You might have fallen for him a little bit in that moment.

“Okay.”

He kissed the side of your mouth, a teasing little peck, and you smirked, turning your head so you wouldn’t break the image you had created for him, but he was already looking down, busily occupied with your wrists, so you drew back, focusing instead on riding him, closing your eyes. You built a leisurely, pleasurable pace, leaning forward a bit to rub your clit against the base of his cock, sighing contentedly at the way he filled you, a wonderful, thick, satisfying girth that you could get used to, other than the fact that most of the time Seokjin drove you up the wall, but, hey, maybe if both of you reached a certain age and you were still single, maybe you could marry your best friend solely for having accessible dick…

“Ah! Perfect.”

You cracked open one eye.

And tried not to burst out laughing.

“Erm… well…” you coughed, tugging at the rope a little. It looked messy and rather hideous, parts overlapping and twisting awkwardly, but he had the… basic idea? It wasn’t like you were going to do anything dumb anyway, so it was pretty good for a first time.

Seokjin frowned. “I don’t know how you did it so neatly…”

“You line up the coils next to each other – ah!”

He seemed to think that was good enough and grabbed handfuls of your ass, causing you to tip forward and brace your hands against his chest, gasping as his hips thrust up into you, abrupt pleasure blooming up your core, sudden squelch of wetness between your joined hips.

“Come on,” he grunted, clenching his jaw, tone getting deeper and more dangerous with each word. “I have to get off, and now.”

He smacked his hands down on your ass and you almost whimpered.

Almost.

Seokjin drew back a little, giving you a strange look.

“W… What?” you managed to get out.

He tilted his head. “Do you like that?”

You almost said, no, of course not, but you stopped yourself, looking down at the red rope tied around your wrists, heat flaring in your cheeks, ass stinging slightly from his slap.

His cock twitched inside you.

Your eyes flickered up to him. A sly smirk danced on your lips.

“Yeah. I like the things you do to me.”

You saw Seokjin pause, brown eyes widening a little, black hair over his forehead.

You pushed him down on the bed. He gasped, but he was used to it now, gripping your ass and tipping his head back as you began to really ride him, waving your hips to ram his cock into your pussy, not even noticing the moan seeping from your lips, fuck, it was good, fulfilling and deep, your bound hands on his chest, fingers spread out and nails digging into his skin a little, but Seokjin seemed to be into it, his own nails sinking into your ass, pushing you down with every descent, hitting you harder, rougher, intensifying the pleasure, building onto it. Hot breath, warm skin, joined hips, loud slaps, rocking bedframe, your breasts bouncing with each thrust, gazing at each other through half-lidded eyes, not quite seeing each other but drowning in the gratification, the roughness, gasping sharply as his open palm smacked down on your ass again, making it bounce and jiggle in his hands, your core and thighs squeezing tighter, witnessing his tight hiss of desire, mesmerized by your sound so he did it again, spanking the other cheek, and you did it again, whimper creeping out, arousal consuming his handsome features, intoxicated by your reaction to his action so he did it again and again, hard, stinging slaps as you rode his stiff, quivering cock harder and faster, fuck, Seokjin must be incredibly turned on because he was so fucking hard, just so incredibly sexy how hard he was right now, even the pain was nothing but an injection of added carnal pleasure, throwing your head back and sinking your nails into his skin, fucking him recklessly, forgetting about hiding your moans, who the fuck cared, not you and not him because Seokjin too was crying out, the sinful sound of sex echoing off his bedroom walls, except instead of you in your bedroom putting headphones on to drown him out, you were in his bedroom, doing it, fucking the daylights out of him.

Alright.

You could see why girls wanted to date your best friend now.

Seokjin was a loud dork, but he had a great dick.

“F-Fuck, Seokjin, fuck!”

He had a similar response, although it was more a choked garble of your name mixed with, “Oh fuck, I’m gonna cum, fuck!”

You must really be drunk on his dick because even that turned you on and tipped you over the edge.

Your thighs tensed and you moaned deeply, tucking your chin down and spreading your palms onto his pecs, wrists straining against the cotton rope, a rapid torrent of adrenaline soaring through you and then you smacked your ass down onto Seokjin’s crotch, whining as you came in vicious pulses of pleasure, clenching around his jerking length and you realized Seokjin was clutching your ass, pinning it down so you couldn’t move, shooting his release into the condom, so much that you felt his cock shudder and throb inside you, head buried in your deepest, most pleasurable spot, you feeling all of him and him feeling all of you.

Holy shit.

You almost saw stars.

“Hah… wow… I guess I can’t blame younger dudes for wanting this pussy…”

Your eyes weren’t open but your eyebrow twitched in annoyance.

“Shut up, Seokjin.”

-

“Come on, man! Look what you did!” Seokjin barked accusingly, pointing to his chest with red indents of your rings.

“Excuse me? I’m the one who has scratches and a bruised ass!”

“You’ve marred my beautiful skin! I should fine you!”

“Where’s that fuckin’ whip – get your naked ass back here, Kim Seokjin!”

-

Hm, well, maybe you would find your true love some other time. Maybe try gambling?

--

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