#been thinking about deer motifs for A While and . yeah.

[parkeryangs]

felix woe.begone deer motif. y'know.

[blue-rose-soul]

Always happy to oblige,i personally tought the line was a little cheesy but, hey i'm not wrong!

But about changing alastor's powerset,if you think about it, is perfectly possible to, well not exactly change, more like expand his powerset just by looking at one of his principals (or so i believe) motifs: the Wendigo.

Because seriously the skinny long body,the canibalism,even the deer motif that they have been gaining in the last decades,the inspiration looks pretty clear to me! Not only that but i always thought that,everytime that i look at the image of one they always seem to cast an aura and atmosphere that darkens and cools their surroundings making everything seem ...dead, which seems exactly the opposite of the aura that Hazbin Lucifer brings, his powers always seems to make everything brighter,warmer and livelier.

So for me, as Alastor becomes more powerful, his powers(dark,cold,death,profanity) seem like a reflection and perversion of Lucifer's(light,warm,life,holiness) seems like the perfect idea. Not only that but even without the deer motif,wendigos are always depicted almost like twisted corpses suffering from frostbite,which drives even more the thought that without lucifer's light to guide him, Alastor lost himself to the cold evils of humanity and allowed it to twist him into a monster.

Gahhhh! I can pratically see the fatherly angsty RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME!!!

Al's really going hard for that "rebel angsty yougest son" prize isn"t he?

To be perfectly honest, I don't like associating Alastor with the w*ndigo. That being belongs to the Algonquin-speaking people, and it's not just some random scary monster. It's an actual religious figure. And a dangerous one at that.

But even if that weren't the case, it simply doesn't fit Alastor's background. Alastor is a mixed race Louisiana Creole man. His ancestors would have come to the United States from France or Spain or have been brought over as slaves. The Algonquin people, on the other hand, consist of several different groups who all historically lived in northern parts of the modern United States and eastern Canada. While Alastor could have had some Native American ancestry, it likely would have been from a different group altogether, not one of the Algonquin groups.

And while w*ndigo are popularly depicted in modern media as having antlers or being a deer-like monster, that's really more of a misconception. It resembles a sort of walking dead, gaunt, with ice for a heart or else entirely wrapped in ice.

So, to sum things up, the w*ndigo is:

Not my culture.

Not Alastor's culture.

Not a deer.

And, yeah, I'm aware that there's a bit of a double standard here, given Alastor's depicted as a vodou practitioner. I had him grow up Catholic for a reason, although since the vodou is a part of his established character, as well as the culture he would have grown up with, I don't want to cut it out entirely.

All that said though, I am leaning heavily into the parallels of light and dark, creation and destruction with Alastor and Lucifer. It's like Alastor's a symbol of everything the elders of Heaven expect Lucifer to be. Alastor would hate being called the 'rebel angsty son' but it's absolutely 1000% true! Guess he and Luci have something in common after all.

[hosticaaa]

Questions for muns of canon muses

@novinare 𝖜𝖍𝖎𝖘𝖕𝖊𝖗𝖊𝖉 ; Do you have any controversial headcanons that go against what is generally accepted by the fandom? Do you incorporate this into writing your muse or keep it to yourself? What is an aspect of your muse’s canon material or canon existence that you never had the opportunity to explore but really want to?

Ohh, yes !! I think I have something that fits for both questions for Al right off the bat kinda. If I could make art of the stuff in my brain it'd be over but since I can't, yeah, I'll have to just talk about it. I really imagine Alastor's true demon form to be something grotesque and horrifying, more so than what we see in the show since I don't imagine that as his complete true form. My Alastor's true form would be a nightmarish amalgamation of the creature in Antlers, the Xenomorph Queen and a hint of the gaping dragon in Dark Souls.

He has monstrous features of a huge, "rotting" stag and something more crocodilian because another, I guess, "unique" feature of my take on Alastor is that his deer aesthetic is very off putting, this is very much in the realms of the "not deer" rather than an actual deer and I personally also relate him to a crocodile more than a deer internally so thats kind of a dual/hidden motif for him. This is kinda the supernatural representation of Alastor appearing to be a kind, charming gentleman but actually being a savage, unnatural killer underneath that.

Tbh, I've gone back and forth on it because I think the fanon of Al having a little deer tail is super cute but I don't think mine has one. His true form has a tail, but its long and reptilian and not deer-like. So I guess if I give my Al a little hidden tail it would more reflect this and instead of being a cute deer tail it'd be more like a velvety nub, so not cute and fluffy like the way the fandom depicts it.

It also kinda ties to Al's swamp aesthetic and I personally have an idea that Al's "serial killer name" or at least one of the nicknames that the public gave the supposed perpetrator of his killings was "the bayou beast." So yeah, that all kinda ties and links together for me but since this is my first time getting to actively write Alastor I haven't been able to really explore any of that too much until hopefully now ! Something I'd like to also go into is the esoteric / occult aspects of him but I'm sort of waiting to see what the canons gonna do with this first.

Also, as far as Dabi's concerned I tend to go against fanon with him pretty hard in general, and yeah, no, I'm def someone who likes to make this clear and obvious as possible. I understand a lot of it got popular before the major background reveals but to be honest as someone who watched and read the series with no spoilers my headcanons and thoughts about him developed pretty early on so I'm still kinda left baffled as to where and why fanon developed certain ways for him, like, outside of people just being wildy horny, kinda stereotyping alternative people in a grossly negative way and just sort of lacking narrative awareness in general, I guess ? So actually I guess I'm not baffled, more just irritated by it, actually. While Dabi IS alt, and I portray him as majorly a crust punk personally, the fandoms take of Dabi's altness is very shallow/inauthentic and focuses on shit that has nothing to do with punk/alt subculture or no more to do with it than mainstream culture ( Like being a junkie/drug addict and a sex fiend fuck boy ). So yeah, I pretty much headcanon Dabi as the complete opposite of what is popular and expected of him in fanon.

As for things to explore ? I'd love more Todoroki fam stuff !! And more stuff with the LoV, like just general stuff honestly but this can kinda tricky because both the LoV and the Todoroki family outside of Shoto can be hard to find as muses. The threads I have with the Todo fam rn are so special to me, I love them so much but I do hope the fandom livens up in May maybe.

[molination]

thoughts on HoRe

So…if you guys didn’t hear, the design of new seele, herrscher of rebirth, got leaked and is everywhere now

Honestly the design is growing on me like there is genuinely a lot of symbolism but I was too blinded by the honkaitwt hate train so let me unpack them right now.

First of all there were complaints that there are no butterflies anymore, which is seele’s motif. I think this is a misconception because seele has always been represented by flowers while veliona was the one with the butterfly motif. This is proven in the 6.6 trailer where seele is in a flower field and a crimson butterfly flies by, in which crimson has always been veliona’s color.

Secondly, there were also complaints on how HoRe should have more references to veliona, when I think hyv intended this battlesuit to be THE seele battlesuit. It’s becoming more implied that veliona cannot stay with seele forever, seen from the 6.6 trailer when the butterfly flies away from the flower field, and the introduction of the separation of seele and veliona in the salt and snow city arc. This separation is clearly vital to seele’s character development because seele has always depended on veliona to be strong. Just like how the butterfly leaves the flower field to pollinate and hence help the flower field grow, Veliona has to leave Seele so Seele can potentially become a herrscher. Thus, it is why there is a lack of veliona through aspects such as color scheme and symbolism.

Additionally, there are some people that mentioned that the butterflies best represent the theme of rebirth. Yet, there are already a lot of symbols in HoRe that represent rebirth themselves such as the deer and the flowers on the outfit.

The deer has always been traditionally symbolized as rebirth because deer can shed their antlers and grow them back

The flowers on seele’s outfit look like lotuses to me. Lotus flowers also represent rebirth since in Chinese mythology, these flowers represent the deity Ne Zha, whose body was reconstructed by the lotus plant after his original body was smited by lightning.

So yeah, in all in all, the devs definitely want seele and only seele to shine.

But of course there are definitely parts of HoRe that could be changed. My biggest nit pick is the skimpiness of the clothing. For starters I agree this doesn’t really fit the whole idea of death, which is what everyone originally thought HoRe is going to be about, but furthermore also doesn’t fit rebirth either. Death and rebirth are serious topics so it could have been more appropriate to be more fully clothed and not wear fragments of protective clothing. Second of all, seele is probably 17 if the math is mathing, so the lack of clothing was…a choice (this is an euphemism).

[enthusispastic]

Okay so this is going to be a weird post but I have to put this out there on the internet somewhere. My Pokemon conspiracy theory is that the boxart legends of most Pokemon games have been prefigured by common Pokemon in the generation before them.

Think about it people!

Upcoming in SV we have a lizard-like duality of futuristic technology and the past. You know. Like combining a fossil salamander with a stealth bomber. Dragapult prefigures the SV legends.

In SwSh, we have two wolves, split between a speedier attacker and a bulkier build. Literally they're just a legendary upgrade to the main lycanroc forms.

In SuMo, we had a sun lion and a mystical bat. Like a fire lion and a dragon bat. Pyroar is Solgaleo and Noivern is Lunala. At a push, we even have a prismatic Pokemon that has lore about transformation and a legendary. Carbink as a Necrozma precursor?

In XY we have a vulture associated with death and a deer associated with nature. Oh yeah, like a skeleton vulture? Mandibuzz? And a deer that changes with the seasons? Sawsbuck?

Then in BW we have legendaries in a set of games often said to be callbacks to RB, with the box legendaries being a physical attacking electric type and a special attacking fire type, with themes of dualism and partnership, whose ice-type counterpart is obscured and forgotten in the lore. Oh. Yeah. Electivire and Magmortar parallel that strongly.

Then back in DP we have a pair of legendaries that in the lore are treated as incredibly powerful, and have associations with time and space. This is a weirder one, but I think if you bear with me, I can explain this. Gen III was the only generation to give us two pseudolegendary Pokemon. And one (Salamence) has a metamorphosis motif (change over time) while the other (Metagross) is explicitly an alien (from space).

Now, gen III wasn't really on the horizon during the development of GS, so I don't think they did any deliberate planting for RS, but there are two flying type (therefore weather?) Pokemon whose types do correspond to the RS boxart legends: Gligar and Mantine. They are even both strong ish and (at the time) standalones in their evolutionary lines.

And of course, GS were not considered at all during development of the first generation, so the trail runs dry here.

[gamebunny-advance]

Grab Bag Doodle Dump

It’s been a while since one of these, huh? Well, I just haven’t had anything that substantial to post. I’ve done a lot of revisiting old sketch ideas like superfan!AU, but they’re about on par as the first sketches I posted of them, so I didn’t see the point in posting them. But now I finally feel like I have enough garbage to throw into a grab bag, so here ya go.

Notes under the cut~

1-3) More Vtubesona ideas. I dunno if they really have a “theme.” If I do become a vtuber, then I’d like to keep some motifs from GAB (my bunny mascot thing) without making them a bunny because bunny themed vtubers are a dime a dozen. I haven’t incorporated them into my sketches yet, but I have thought of going for a light nudibranch theme (aka, the sea bunnies). It’s an idea, but I dunno what to do with it. For now, I’m just worried about adding the GAB’s “lucky charms” buttons somewhere in the design. The first one is my favorite so far.

4-5) NSR x Animal Crossing: Initial Sketches. I dunno how I feel about Tati’s beak. On the one hand, it’s inaccurate, but on the other, it looks so plain when I keep it all gray. I already had to give up her earrings because birds don’t have earlobes, so I need some other pop of color around the head area.

Just for fun, these are the ideas for the other characters I’ve had so far:

Mayday: Either bird or squirrel. A bird because they sing, and it would tie back to Tati being an eagle as Mayday tries to follow in her footsteps. A squirrel just because I think it suits her.

Zuke: A horse. “I’m a little zonkey! Hee-haw! Hee-haw!”

DK West: A bull. Should be obvious.

DJSS: A bear. It’s the biggest animal with the roundest head. Ursa Major is also a pretty famous constellation, so I think it works with the space theme.

Yinu + Mother: Kitten + Tiger. I imagine Yinu as being Katie’s size, so not the big cats, but the little kittens. I guess Father would be the regular cat. Or maybe I’ll switch Mayday and Tati’s bird themeing with Yinu and Mother’s cats since Yinu also has birdcage imagery in her original boss fight, but if I’m gonna go that far, then I might as well bring back lion!Kliff too. Yeah, maybe I’ll go with that instead, so bird!Yinu and eagle!Mother.

1010 + Neon J.: Undecided. I want them all to be the same animal, but I don’t know what animal would accommodate J’s screen the best.I’ve considered deer, rabbits, ducks, and dogs, but I really don’t know what I want to do for them. Maybe in a turn of irony, they’re the only humans? I dunno.

Eve: Giraffe or Ostrich: They got long necks. That’s my only justification.

NPC Lighting round! It’s not all of them, just the ones I’ve thought about Figure out the justification yourself: sheep!Zam, penguin!Gigi, rabbit!Zed, duck!Yiruk, mouse!Mia.

Sadly, I don’t have anything for Sayu. She’s technically already half animal so... yeah.

6) “I miss my wife Tails.” I started on this, but gave up on it. Maybe I’ll come back to it.

7) Octobots. It took me till Cephalobot showed up and I loved him to realize that I’m interested in a lot of characters that are associated with both robots and octopi. I mean, 3 isn’t that many, but it’s more than I thought would exist. Well, I’m the only one that associates Green/E.G. with octopi, but it still counts.

8) More detailed(?) GW. I originally sketched this for Blacktober since my human!GW is black (Tabuu too!). Actually, if I were to design more human!Flats, they would probably all be black except the ones that aren’t silhouettes like Climber. Even then, I’d probably just make them light-skinned.

[mayorofcattown]

Patreon Update

Changing things up a bit on my patreon this month, I’ve decided to start posting some concept sketches and things up on my patreon while I start roughing out designs for some of my newer original story ideas, specifically the animal people one I’ve been posting about recently.

link: https://www.patreon.com/mayorofcattown

Since I’m currently already working on my original sci fi VN os:tri, I didn’t really want to spend a tonne of time and energy drawing/posting full pieces and designs for characters for a game idea that probably won’t get made for literal years, especially when I really should be promoing the game that’s coming out before it, but I still want to share some of the process cause it’s neat, so I figured I’d upload rough process things and more indepth lore to my patreon where people who are interested can see more, but I can still keep them fairly rough and focus more art energy on things that are actually important.

This is all to say I’ve just posted some rough concept sketches of the family of my deer boy OC Raleigh, including Prince Not Phillip the unicorn man I was lamenting about the other day lol. here is a fun teaser

There’s also just some more indepth Lore about their whole convoluted family drama, and also some little logos and things I designed

I’m still going to keep doing the speedpaints cause they’re easy enough to make (I might still do one this month if I have time? I’ll see) these are just a fun extra edition. I also wont post anything that outright spoils any of my story ideas, it’s mostly just set up/worldbuilding stuff, esp stuff that’d show up fairly early on anyway, so not everything I make will get posted there, but there’s enough non spoiler stuff to still be worth sharing.

Oh yeah I also decided to name for this setting/universe/whatever is probably going to be Soluna. I just think it sounds neat and fits the sun/moon motif

[dailybeastarsthings]

Chapter 6 - A Wind Of Change

The Grim Reaper and a distressed mistress were running quickly through the dark forest. As they were moving, branches and leaves kept brushing them wildly as if they were trying to hold them captive until the chasers would eventually reach and capture them both.

‘Why are they chasing me, Grim Reaper?’ the mistress asked.

‘Because you were supposed to have died three days ago” the Reaper said without even looking back.

Suddenly, the Reaper flung his sword and cut one of their chasers in half. The poor soulless demon let out a lifeless sigh before its death.

‘Water, Wind, Fire… The forces of nature all want you dead.’

‘Then… These entities are a part of them?’

‘Yes… This is a fight against fate.’

Our heroes were cornered. As the demons were closing in, the Reaper hid the mistress behind his cape to protect her. He took out his sword and looked their enemies in the eye.

‘Stay behind me. Killing you… is my job. Until then, I won’t let anyone lay a finger on you.’

And with that the Reaper lunged out to fight!

‘Okay, that’s it for Scene 15. We will now take a break’ said Sanu, the president of the Drama Club, shattering the tension into a million pieces. Sanu was a third-year Pelican student in Cherryton Academy. He was elected to be president just as he became a second-year but has known many of the members from way before. He used to be a background actor in many plays but never appeared again after becoming president. He always made sure to let the creativity and emotions flow freely in the club while maintaining its integrity and improving the relationships of the members.

‘What? Why, Sanu?’ Louis asked with audible dismay in his tone. ‘We’ve never taken a break in a rehearsal before.’

‘Oh… Well, it’s just going to be 30…’ he swallowed his words after seeing Louis’ expression ‘I… I mean 15 minutes.’

Sanu walked up on stage to Louis. He leaned close to him and started whispering.

‘You know, Louis, we’ve known each other for a long time now. I can tell that your movements are... how should I put this… a bit stale. Are you feeling well?’

‘Quit whispering Sanu. I’m perfectly fine.’ Louis replied. He then turned to the other members present on stage. ‘This performance is the most important part of the New Student Welcome Event. We need to show all of the new students the importance of the Drama Club, so we have no time to worry about our physical condition’ he said while he wiped the sweat off his forehead and neck with his towel.

Louis hanged his towel on his antler then bent over a bit, to rest a little. He turned his head towards the other students on the stage and glared at them with flaming irritation in his eyes.

‘Next time attack me like you mean it. I’m a deer as Adler, and you’re all carnivores, attacking Adler with the intent to kill. That’s what we are going to portray when we get on stage, so we need to be as fierce as we possibly can.’

Taking advantage of the break, Louis walked backstage to relax his foot a little. It was still sore and while the medications were certainly helping, the fact that he didn’t put on his bandages in order to avoid any awkward questions definitely didn’t help. He was in a lot of pain. He could feel his ankle pulsating, radiating the pain from the injury to nearby areas as well. He wanted to scream, but he couldn’t.

‘Sanu is right… My movements are not perfect this time. I can’t put too much weight on my leg if I want to avoid any further problems. However, a perfect performance is expected from me, so I’ll give them just that. Even if it means that I’ll hurt my leg even more!’ he thought.

He suddenly heard Sanu’s voice.

‘All right everyone, break is over, we’re beginning from Scene 16!’

And with that, Louis put on his act of being completely fine and went back on stage to play his other part, Adler, the Grim Reaper.

***

Meanwhile, the stage crew was busy making the finishing touches on the costumes backstage.

‘What? A break from rehearsal? We’ve never had a break before!’ Dom said with surprise in his voice.

Dom was a third-year peafowl student. He was the leader of the Drama Club’s stage crew. Although he was a long-time member, he never had any ambitions on becoming an actor nor the president of the club. He was always perfectly fine with sewing costumes. He had great talent at it. His costumes always turned out to be vibrant and lively – and yet, comfortable. He had aspirations on becoming a fashion designer in the future.

‘Well yeah, but I haven’t heard all the details. Kibi hurried me because the boxes we were carrying were really heavy’ Legoshi said.

‘Yeah, but Louis is always excited when the performance is coming close. I can’t even imagine how frustrated he must have been’ Kibi, an ant eater member said.

As the conversation was going on, Kai’s face – who was directed to be part of the stage crew instead of the acting crew – became more and more red by the second. Deep down he was still sure that he should’ve been approved as Tem’s replacement as he knew the script by heart and had way more practice in acting than Zoe.

‘Damn it!’ he yelled ‘I was supposed to be rehearsing with all of them, not sewing in this dark place!’

‘Oh, Kai, I think you have a good sense of design. I’m happy that you’re part of the stage crew’ Dom said with a soft smile on his face.

‘Oh… Really? Do you mean it?’ Kai asked excited.

‘Of course!’

In the meantime, Legoshi was digging for some extra yarn in a box next to him, when he suddenly found a white and gold vest, which was part of Tem’s costume.

‘This is Tem’s costume’ he said. The others looked at him in surprise. ‘What should I do with it?’ he continued.

‘Well…’ Fudge, the red panda began ‘We can’t just keep it here forever, you know.’

‘Look, Legoshi, Tem is dead so it’d be creepy if we still kept it around!’ Kai yelled at him in frustration. Legoshi’s ears drooped.

‘Tem was killed and devoured by one of the carnivore students in this school’ Legoshi thought. ‘That is the biggest taboo an animal can commit in this world. That’s why none of the others want to dwell on that incident. There’s a bottomless pit of darkness lurking in this world. Now I understand the meaning of what Louis said. The meaning of why he is acting so fiercely as Adler. He must be the one, who is confronting the reality of that incident the most. He has the ambition to be the next Beastar, so he needs to take center stage in the world of carnivores and herbivores. I can’t even imagine the pressure he must…’ his thought was interrupted.

‘Legoshi! Legoshi!’ Dom yelled at him. ‘Were you listening?’

‘Oh! Umm… Yeah!’

‘You were spacing out again, weren’t you?’

‘Maybe…’ Legoshi said, while looking to the side. His ears drooped a little, too.

‘All right, well, we were talking about bringing flowers from the Gardening Club. I want to use roses as the motif for the final act and decorate the assembly hall and entrance, too. Look.’

Dom held up a drawing of what he imagined. It was beautiful. Large bouquets of red and white roses – ones with only a singular color, others mixed together to symbolize the two sides of the play, good and evil. It looked wonderful and grand – and Legoshi believed that it would’ve smelled amazing, too!

‘There should be plenty of roses in the Gardening Club, and I want you to help’ Dom said.

‘You mean… with decorating?’ Legoshi asked.

‘That and with getting the roses from the Club.’

‘Are you sure that I should go? I mean, this whole incident and all… I don’t want to scare anyone…’

‘I think you should’ Kibi said. ‘You’re a second-year high school student, so you ought to improve your social skills.’

‘Well, okay then. But you’ll have to come with me, too.’

The Gardening Club was a long walk from the Drama Club, since it was on the rooftop of a building at the other end of the school. While Legoshi had no problem walking such distances at high speeds, Kibi had to jog alongside him, if he wanted to keep up with him. By the time they were climbing the steps to the rooftop, Kibi was already exhausted.

‘Was it absolutely necessary for me to come with you?’ Kibi asked almost breathless.

‘Sorry, but I think the members would be scared to see a lone wolf asking for flowers’ Legoshi said.

There were only a few steps until the end. When they got to the top, they were greeted by a large green iron door. It had rust around the frame and near the doorknob. The building definitely had to face water damage a good few times.

‘I never knew there was a garden on the rooftop’ Legoshi said, while reading the sign on the door, which said ‘Gardening Club’.

‘It’s probably not well-known among carnivores. It’s a pretty plain club anyway. They rarely appear publically. They only sell flowers at events and festivals.’

As Legoshi was reaching for the doorknob, he became aware of a very familiar smell. But how did he know it? Why did he notice it? It suddenly sparked the memory in his mind. The smell belonged to the student he almost devoured just yesterday!

‘I have to get out of here, quick!’ he thought.

‘Wait, that smell is…’ Legoshi said but he was interrupted by Kibi.

‘Probably the flowers. Pretty amazing isn’t it! Well… let me just go ahead and open the door.’

As the door opened, a beautiful view of a thousand colorful flowers of all shapes, kinds and sizes greeted them. Under an arch near the entrance, a small white rabbit was holding a hose, watering the plants around the area. Legoshi recognized her at an instant. It was the rabbit girl he attacked. It was Haru. When she heard the steps, she closed the water and looked at her visitors.

‘Hello. Do you need something?’ Haru asked, smiling softly.

Legoshi was still in shock. His heart was beating fast and he began to sweat. He couldn’t believe that their paths crossed once again. But one thing was sure: he entered a place, which he should have never gone to. It was heaven… in hell…

[analyzing-the-rebellion-story]

The Rebellion Story Analysis Addendum

It’s been four years since I finished the analysis, and a lot of my views have changed! Here are my revised opinions!

In italics is something I said in the analysis.

In plain font is my updated interpretation.

I highly doubt that Kyubey has a biological need for sleep, so I guess that means he’s just been lying there all night. Contemplating.

Another possibility is that he’s communicating telepathically with the other Incubators. After all, what better time would there be to discuss their plans?

Sayaka is a raspberry. Raspberries are soft, but have a strong and distinct flavor. That describes Sayaka pretty well, I think.

Kyoko is an apple. Apples are sweet and wholesome, but their seeds have traces of cyanide. This suits Kyoko well because, while she’s generally nice nowadays, she can be kind of a jerk sometimes.

Homura is a pumpkin. The pumpkin is a delicious and fulfilling produce, but it can be twisted into something frightening (like a Jack-o-Lantern). Considering Homura’s mutation later in the film…

Mami is cheese, a dairy product made from milk. The purpose of milk is to nurture young, and Mami is easily the most nurturing of the girls, so the cheese is referencing her motherly personality.

I wasn’t very serious about these interpretations to begin with, but in hindsight, there are far more straightforward connections between the girls and their respective foods:

1) According to the Madoka Wiki, raspberries are known as “healing fruit” in Japan. I couldn’t find a source for this, but if it’s true, then the connection to Sayaka should be obvious.

2) Kyoko being an apple is probably an allusion to her religious background (think forbidden fruit). This is reinforced by the fact that she stole a bag of apples in the original series.

3) The pumpkin is another one of Homura’s witch symbols, like the newts and owls.

4) Mami is cheese because Bebe eats cheese, and… well…

…Yeah.

This part makes no sense. The figures start crowding around Homura and Kyoko, and don’t leave until Kyoko agrees to keep a lid on things. Homura’s emotions influence the Gemworld, but all she wants is for Kyoko to keep a low profile. This would mean that Homura wants Kyoko to avoid drawing attention to herself, but at the same time is unconsciously willing attention towards Kyoko. What?

The figures surrounding them probably reflect Homura’s fear of causing too much of a disruption. When Kyoko agrees to keep her head down, the fear is assuaged and the figures leave them alone as a result.

The Incubators should’ve spent more time beta testing their memory-altering tech, because it’s proven to be very easy to awaken the girls’ memories of the real world.

Originally I assumed that the Incubators had wiped the girls’ memories so that they wouldn’t catch on to their plan. However, there’s a distinct possibility that it was Homura altering everyone’s memories, which would explain how she recovered her own so readily (and this is supported by the fact that her new world ability is memory manipulation). Kyubey does explicitly state that he wants Madoka to remember her purpose, so unless he thought that her amnesia was some sort of technical failure, I’m gonna place my bets on Homura.

WHAT THE-?!

This... This thing randomly appears behind Mami and displays a walnut, presumably for cracking purposes. I honestly haven't the tiniest clue what this is supposed to represent. Is it symbolic of Mami's dormant memories "cracking open"? Is it foreshadowing Homura's transformation into the Nutcracker Witch? Just... what the heck?!

Since this happens immediately before Bebe is ruled out as the witch, it’s probably just vague foreshadowing without any real symbolism. It could be argued that the uncracked nut represents the unsolved mystery, but since Homulilly is incapable of cracking nuts to begin with, that feels like a stretch.

A rune briefly flashes. It translates into, “you”. As in Homura.

This is supposed to be an answer to the question, “Who is dreaming?” from earlier. I’m sure most of you already knew that, but I feel as though I should’ve pointed it out anyway.

(If you don’t remember this part, it happens right before Homura does her witch test)

The pink spool reappears, only to be kicked away by the Clara Dolls. Not even Madoka’s influence can save Homura from this despair.

Another possibility is that, in her mind, Homura deliberately defied the Law of Cycles (hence the spool getting kicked). It isn’t until Kyubey opens his telepathic mouth that she realizes this isn’t the case.

Shouldn’t Homura’s parents be wondering where she is? Does she even have parents?! I’ve been wondering that since the original series…

I can’t believe it never occurred to me that Homura didn’t invite her own parents into the labyrinth. That’s pretty strong evidence that they’re either dead, or put her up for adoption at a very young age.

Seeing Kyoko at a diner makes me wish there was a spinoff series exploring the personal lives of the girls (preferably with drama-comedy themes). Also, those familiars are giving me chills.

Another thing that flew over my head is that those familiars were sent to kidnap her. Same with Mama, Hitomi and Kyousuke.

Mami summons a train, and unsurprisingly, it has a teacup motif. The deer are kind of random, though…

Since Mami primarily fights with guns, the deer are most likely a reference to trophy hunting.

The runes translate into, “The Eternal Feminine”. This is probably a reference to Faust, a poem that apparently served as an inspiration for Madoka Magica (it’s about a man who trades his soul for unlimited power. Sound familiar?). Here’s a snippet for context:

“Everything that can be perceived is only a symbol; the imperfect, which cannot be realized, here makes itself reality; that which cannot be described, here finally completes itself. It is the eternal feminine, always attracting us to the higher.”

Homura is definitely drawn to “the higher”, though the underlying theme of salvation kind of gets subverted in the end…

While I still agree with this interpretation, I don’t think I did a very good job at describing/contextualizing it. At the end of Faust, the main character’s soul is saved from damnation and guided to Heaven by Gretchen*. This achievement is attributed to the Eternal Feminine, a female essence that draws humans to salvation. This is precisely what Madoka accomplishes at the end of the TV show and is attempting to do with Homura in this very scene.

*The namesake of Madoka’s witch form.

When the explosion the over, the magic forms this symbol. I’m not sure what it’s supposed to be, though? It vaguely resembles the portal to Magical Heaven, but the color effects make it hard to tell. It might also be a wheel, but the contours are very crystal-like.

Don’t know if this was intentional, but the symbol bears a loose resemblance to a dreamcatcher. “Who is dreaming?” is a recurring question throughout the movie, and at this point in time, the world Homura “dreamed” inside her soul gem is becoming a reality. From her perspective, she’s also preventing a “nightmare” by relieving Madoka of her duties and returning everything she sacrificed.

I’m not sure where else they would go, Homu. You didn’t make a new world, you just rebuilt the old one.

She’s probably talking about the Law of Cycles Dimension/Magical Heaven/Land Without Cheese/whatever you want to call it. Homura only took the part of the Law that contained Madoka’s original identity, but since it was the original Madoka that wished for the Law in the first place, her removal caused the entire system to collapse and expel her angels, too. This is why she says that Sayaka and Nagisa “somehow” got dragged along too even though she only wanted Madoka.

In other words, Homura pulled the wrong block from a Jenga stack.

Lastly, I want to point out an observation I made about Demon Homura’s world. When she unravels the Law of Cycles and renders it inaccessible, but also forces the Incubators to shoulder humanity’s curses, the end result is a “middle ground” between the previous two worlds. Think about it: In the first world, Magical Girls are doomed to become witches, while in the second world, they’re ultimately saved by Madoka. In Homura’s world, however, neither of these things can happen, which means she essentially created a world where there is neither salvation nor damnation. I really hope the eventual sequel explores this concept further; it’s very interesting.

Aaaaaaand that wraps it up! I hope you enjoyed this little bonus round as much as I did!

[ask-crimson-weaver]

So This is Awkward

Melly landed outside of the Avengers’ base in Centrum City, swiftly making her way inside and down to the detainment wing. As she entered the wing, she headed for the spot where Harley said he’d be, and the buzz of spider-sense pinged off of his suit as she got close, and she eventually spotted him standing next to a table with a few assorted gadgets laid out on it. 

“Hey, Owlloy!” Melly called over to him. “I’m here now-- mind giving me the rest of the details?”

Harley looked over in Melly’s direction, giving her a nod in greeting before turning his gaze back down to the objects on the table.

“Okay, so… a basic summary: I’m flying around, and hear over the comms that something’s going down off on the other side of town. I speed over there, but the place is already wrecked, and this guy is just… standing in the middle of it. He bolted before I got around to finishing the ‘friend or foe’ question… which, considering that he made a run for it, isn’t really giving him the benefit of the doubt. Tried to stun him, but ended up knocking him out instead.”

“Okay…” Melly said, thinking through what her teammate had just said. “What about the guy himself? Anything that stood out when you found him?”

“Well, aside from the ‘deer in the headlights’ stare I got from him, he seems to be a fan of the Spider motif-- had one front and center-- had one front and center when we pulled off his jacket while looking for stuff like this.” He waved a hand down at the table in front of him. “Saw him use a webline too, but we didn’t find any webshooters on him.”

“A spider? Webbing?” Melly said. “That’s pretty specific, given that you’ve got two teammates with the same theme. Think he’s a copycat?”

“I don’t think so,” Harley said. “Specifically… because of this thing.” He reached over, picking up a watch-like device and showing it to Melly. “Remind you of anything?”

Melly raised an eyebrow as she looked it over-- it definitely reminded her of something.

“A portal watch?” Melly asked. “So you’re thinking he’s from another dimension?”

“That’s my guess, yeah,” Harley said. “Still doesn’t tell us why he was doing here in the first place, though.”

“Have you… I dunno, tried to ask him?” Melly asked.

“Well… not yet,” Harley said. “Can’t really ask a guy questions while he’s k.o’ed, you know? He’s awake now, but I figured that you’d want to be around when we actually asked the questions.”

“How thoughtful,” Melly replied somewhat sarcastically. “Though if this guy is actually a Spider… well, guess I could get a look at him and see if the ol’ spidey-sense says that’s the case?”

“Sure,” Harley said with a shrug. “He’s in one of the interrogation rooms down the hall.”

The two made their way to the room, though didn’t immediately go inside. Instead, they stepped into an adjacent room. The two spaces were connected by a one way-mirror, and through it, Melly finally got a look at the mystery vigilante that she had been hearing about for the past week. Spider-sense noted that this guy was indeed a Spider, though the eyepieces of her mask widened from another form of recognition.

“Harley,” Melly said matter-of-factly, “I literally know this guy.”

The eyes of Harley’s suit were more rigid than her own, but even they seemed to widen as he looked between Melly and the man in the other room.

“Seriously?” Harley said. “You mean he’s a part of your Cluster or something?”

“Yes… and no,” Melly said. “He goes by Funnel-Web, last I heard. He’s swung with us a few times, but I haven’t seen him in a while. I also sort of dumped him in the med wing right before everything with Ungoliant kicked off— long story short, he got stabbed, and here was the first place I thought of that could take care of that. This looks like the same guy, and I don’t remember him being one to knock down buildings for the heck of it.”

“But are you sure?” Harley asked. “What if it’s, like… the same guy, but from another another dimension, so he’s never actually met you?”

“Well, guess we’ll just have to ask,” Melly said. “Mind if I go in and handle it?”

“Go for it,” Harley said. “Negotiation hasn’t ever really been my strong suit anyway.”

WIth a final nod, Melly left the room, moving over to the next door over. She let herself take a deep breath in preparation before she opened the door, stepping in and letting it close behind her. Funnel was already looking in her direction as she entered, and from the widened eyepieces that this dimension’s art style allowed to emote, she could tell that he recognized her too.

“So…” Melly said. “This is awkward.”

[spacegaywritings]

Communication of Silence - Chapter 10

Sorry for the late update. The next chap is safe but the one after might have a delay. I will update you. The current situation is causing me a lot of work and issues, so it is struggle time.

Everyone be safe and treat yourself and others with kindness♥

ao3 link! story under the cut.

  The door leaned into its frame and lazily stuck around.

 Dee leaned down to give Virgil’s forehead one last kiss.

 “Be safe. Drive, like, slow or whatever... d-don’t get hurt, okay?”

 She laughed.

She was even more beautiful whenever she laughed.

 “I will be safe and sound. And you will be too. You will go to therapy tomorrow or on Tuesday - otherwise I will cancel.”

 Virgil commented with a scoff and significant eyeroll.

 “Who are you? My sibling?”

 Dee’s deer brown eyes gained another layer of depth and the emo could not help but sigh in defeat. He could feel her

 “Good night, my love. Take care of Patton.”

 Virgil stepped back to support the door in being so close to home and so far from the beauty leaving their proximity.

 “Good night, Dee. Love you. I know.. I will.”

 She smiled at him and disappeared down the staircase, hat covering her head and coat making sure that not too much of her handsome self would be unleashed onto this world all at once.

  He went back inside and told Patton goodnight.

Just thinking about the ginger made Virgil hurt inside.

 This while weekend had been a whole mess of ups and downs.

 Not eating again, passing out on physical exercise and seeing his precious rat and older sibling again.

And having Dee meet the others just felt like the weirdest blur ever.

All in all, it felt.. not that bad.

Well, that was for hid diary to decide.

 He just had to sit down and list all the happy things he had done today and how much he liked. His pages would soak it up and he could make a recap of the week.

 In a few days, he would be old enough to drink alcohol, legally.

It was wild.

Just last year, his life was in shatters and he had tried putting it back together and now he was in a rather stable home and he had a person who respected him and family and friends and even a place where he could study.

 Life really did get better.. somehow..

That was nice to know.

 He smiled when he got back into his and Logan’s shared room.

 “That was certainly something, today”

 Logan greeted him with a voice, more neutral than Switzerland. Even his face looked absolutely untouched, for a sculptor to be sculpted.

The emo cleared his throat and trotted over to his mattress, losing more and more clothing as he progressed.

He was comfortable with taking his jacket off around Logan - or his hoodie in that case.

 The hoodie landed on the mattress first and Virgil groaned as he simply threw himself onto the mattress, shirt coming off and pants half-way following as he lazily wiggled around.

His legs’ movement slowly died down and he commented on it with yet another groan.

 “If you mean something, as in a fuckton of bullshit and feelings, then yeah - you are right.”

 His words came out like spit. It was sudden, forceful and in front of a certain amount of emotions.

A sigh escaped his lips and Logan turned to him, glancing over his roommate’s laying form.

 There was something about Virgil in only shorts.

Logan could see colourful as much as black ink .

 When Virgil drew his hand through his hair, he blinked.

 “Another tattoo? I did not see this one before.”

 The emo curled up and pulled at the clothed he had just shed, forming a little pile of them.

 “Yeah, uh... I ..um”, he started but broke off.

The words were too stubborn to work for him so he simply swung his body back into a sitting position and let his right arm stretch over the edge of Logan’s bed.

 “There you go. If you wanted to see it. I got it this weekend so you could not have seen it before..”, he trailed off and looked at Logan who was adjusting his chair to face Virgil’s body.

He could look at the other without twisting his back in any awkward way, now.

 He could see an arrow, several symbols and words connected by strings and colours.

It mostly looked monochromatic but the emphasis was made with certain accents of different shades of colour from the rainbow.

Enticing.

Logan did enjoy examining tattoos. He found the patterns to be calming and it was fascinating to see what kind of decoration people paid to embed in their skin.

 The meanings.. oh, they were also a good point - considering someone had a deeper motivation behind getting certain motifs.

 “May I ask what this.. foil is?”

 Indeed, as Logan pointed it out, there was some sort of invisible foil strapped over the new design.

 “Ah, yeah. They give you that as protection for the tattoo. It is so the open wound created can, like, heal up without anything getting into it. Others might just instruct you to put some stuff onto it every time the skin is dry. Like, they give you special tattoo lotion that is sort of anti-bacterial or whatever. But with this weird foil uh.. or whatever you wanna call it, you just leave it on and then moisturise three times a day. You keep it on for.. two weeks, I think. Yeah, I think it was one or two. “

 Virgil blinked.

 “I forgot but I put a reminder in my phone so I will not miss it. I just keep forgetting these kidna things, every now and then.”

 He shrugged.

 Logan nodded.

 The invisible patch reminded him of water-proof band-aids. Considering the looks of it, they probably served as something like this.

He had never known about any of these techniques.

 Virgil smiled at the nerd.

His lips hung a bit low despite being curled like a melon slice.

 “Why did you .. I mean, why do you get all these tattoos? Do they mean anything to you or is it just for the aesthetics?”

 The other snorted and leaned back onto his bed.

 “You are funny Logan. You really are.”

 His voice seemed to purr and his words were dancing into Logan’s ears. Sounds were swinging and the fierce smile of his friend was sensually sprawling over the elder student’s vision.

  He cleared his throat.

 “Anyway, this is some kinda sibling bullshit thing. I have been meaning to do that for a while already and finally got to it.”

 Virgil looked down at his arm and played with his dirty laundry.

Just... pushing at his hoodie.

Hey, that one was actually good to wear again at least one or two more times. Hoodies were so hard on catching smells that he loved them even more.

They were the kind of low maintenance clothing he needed in his life.

 “I only recently finished the sketch for it so my sibling went ahead and got it this weekend. I got it the day after so we could go and be there for one another..”, he licked his lips, “you know, sibling shit and all. I kinda fell asleep when I got mine. The vibrations are sort of relaxing and the sound is soothing.”

 Logan chuckled.

 “I never heard of that.”

 The other got up and put on his hoodie again, no shirt for underneath. His boxers got changed and he put his dirty laundry into the nearby basket.

 “Hey Virgil?”

 A hum could be heard.

 The man was fishing inside of his sleepover bag and eventually got out a book.

 “Do you sleep enough?”

 The words fell onto the ground like a judge’s gavel hitting the desk.

 “uh... where did that come from?”

 He laid down but made sure to glance over at Logan.

All he could see was his back since the other was sitting at his desk, writing away as if he was not just starting up some conversation between them with this particularly hot topic.

 “Where did that evasion come from?”

 Oof.

Gotcha.

 “I swear to the stars, Logan, you are a treat.”

 Virgil chuckled and the IT student put his pen aside.

 “You are awake, no matter when I wake up. You fall asleep in weird places, at odd times. I saw you doze off at work - now even at a tattoo parlor when enduring pain? You stated looking paler and more stressed these days and even your eye rings appear to be much darker than I observed before. Therefore, I concluded you might lack sleep.”

 Virgil scoffed at him but did not dare deny his words.

It was true.. not that it was that hard to make out just how sleep-deprived he was but Logan really hit the nail.

 “However, you seem more refreshed when you visited your friends or your sibling. I assume you sleep together?”

 Virgil started scribbling into his stupid diary update therapy shit book thing.

Nerdy, yeah..

Still, it kinda helped him so he did not complain. He actually kinda dug the book and enjoyed writing into it.

 It was empowering to see the good happening in his life or just writing down some shit he felt bad about so he could find out how and why he was more anxious in certain times.

 He hummed.

 “I uh.. don’t take it personal but.. I just can’t relax here. I .. I am.. It is not because of you.”

 Fuck, he sounded like some cliche guy breaking up with someone.

 “Uh, I mean.. This is my problem. I am just stupidly anxio- I mean.. I am anxious a lot and it is hard to sleep and shit but it is okay.”

 He bit his lips.

...self-deprecation was high again.. He put a 6 on his one to ten scale.

 “It happens or whatever. It is not like I am the only person to ever have sleeping problems or whatever.”

 His shoulders shrugged.

 Meanwhile, Logan noted down Virgil’s response.

 “Fellow lover of Bunny Smashskull, would you fancy sleeping in the bed with me?”

  Virgil’s mind stopped for a moment.

Tha..there was more than a bit of information packed into this short sentence.

He.. uh..

 “I- what?”

 He blinked and Logan opened his mouth again to start speaking but Virgil rose his hand, eyes hardening.

 “What do you mean with that sleep thing?”

 His whole body seemed to resemble a cat arching its back. If he had a tail, it would be all fluffy and big, every hair on his body would probably stand up like crazy.

Logan’s brows furrowed together.

He had expected his friend to reacted with a bit more confusion and less... whatever this was. But his words suggested that if Logan did not take careful steps, he would make his friend leave.

 He already sounded as if he was halfway out of the door.

Virgil had a place he had never mentioned before... now that he thought about it, it felt as if he had stopped talking about himself at all ever since he had moved in. Safe for some moments, they had barely talked at all because he was just staying away a lot.

 Was Virgil avoiding him?

 “Virgil, not sleeping is very unhealthy and while I am not your caretaker, I am your friend. As a friend I am expressing my concern for your health as a lack of can increase the risk of many diseases and illnesses to break out - mental and physical ones alike. I noticed you falling asleep with me on the couch despite the amount of people around us, so I suspected that bodily warmth next to you might be beneficial for your sleeping cycle.”

 The emo looked at the nerd, his shoulders immediately dropping to a regular position. The cat fur was smooth and nice again.

He looked so small and tired.

Not once have the dark circles looked as miserable as during this moment.

 “You are.. worried?”

 The words came out in a rather silent whisper. The short sentence was once step before the other in a house with loud and squeaky wood planks when you were awake at night and needed a snack but did not want to wake up your relatives.

The emphasis on the last word made Logan question whether Virgil doubted him that much or rather his own worth.

 Both sounded bad.

 “Of course I am worried. Again, I am your friend and I want you to be well - as much as you can be. If sleeping together in a bed is out of your comfort zone, I would agree to you letting your friends sleep over if you keep it to a reasonable volume.”

 Virgil’s eyes blinked rapidly.

Logan fucking hated people in his space. When Patton as much as nudged the open door further open, the student of computer sciences would get all cranky.

Well, okay maybe he did not hate people but he did value his personal space and he took it very serious.

 Once Roman wanted to put his part of the laundry into Logan’s room and loudly announced at as he did so and Logan immediately rushed over and gave the other a more than hefty talk on respecting his boundaries, commenting on how he could have just dropped it in front of his room’s door.

He had said much more than that and Roman had eventually backed away and muttered something under his breath.

 Those things made Virgil wonder how and why Logan of all people lived with a person such as Roman but...

His face turned sour again and his chest hurt.

 He let out a whine but quickly formed it into a groan.

 “Ugh, whatever. We can sleep together and test your hypotheses or whatever, nerd. If that lets you leave me alone”

 His lips pulled into the top corner of one side.

Logan knew he did that in instances when Virgil did not feel upset at all. It was more an action of deliberation or rather uplifting feelings.

He needed to observe it further but he had found a connection between Virgil’s feelings and his lips pulling into a downward curve.

 “You would help me with my science project?”

 The words tickled Virgil’s nose and he had to smile away the weird feeling in his stomach.

 “Yeah, because we are friends and shit. Like, I care about you and stuff. But just because I had fucking biscuits and they gave me a really good mood.”

 Logan snickered and turned his attention back to his writing for a bit. It did not last for too long despite Virgil continuing his scribbles and whatnot himself. Eventually, the smaller student put his pen aside and closed his notebook.

 “Wait a moment. You fucking know Bunny Smashskull? I am awake, this is not a dream and you asked me about the band, right?”

 He sat up properly and put his notebook aside.

For now, his thoughts were too wild to focus again. His fight or flight reflexes had taken over too much of his logical reasoning once more.

 Logan was still writing, from as much as Virgil could judge.

Really, he could just see his back so there was not too much telling but his arm seemed to flinch a bit every now and then.

 “Log you fucking nerd, answer the question -”

 A smug smile stole itself onto his lips and he got up from his mattress to sit on the one-time-their bed. His notebook was cradled in his lap, just in case.

 The roommate shrugged.

 “So what if I did?”

 Virgil inhaled audibly.

 “Shut up, you do not - “, he started but paused mid-sentence, words stuck in his mind as he realised what he had said and heard so far. His voice dropped from a grand revelation in announcement volume to a low one in the regular fashion of discussing a secret between thieves.

“Holy shit, you do!”

 Logan back flexed but he did not speak.

Instead, he kept writing slowly, neatly for a bit longer.

 Virgil was tempted to walk over and look at his notes.. or to just put his hands on his shoulders and annoy him a bit but he did not know what Logan was writing.

He did not really want to know, really. Curiosity wanted to know for the sake of finding out whatever he did not know.

 “Log, fucking talk to me and talk to my face, you hear me? This is wild! I never took you for the type to rock it.”

 The nerd slowly turned around.

 “You never took me for the type? Very well, I was aware of my ability to hide away my interests but I did not expect myself to be that good.”

 He was tugging at his shirt as if to adjust a bowtie or a necktie. Something fancy and serious like the stuff people in suit would wear.

Come to think of it, Dee did this every now and then.

 Virgil leaned in.

It was time to bond and shit.

 “Your secret is safe with me, log. I promise.”

 Virgil shifted on the bed and patted a spot next to him.

 His friend took the hint and put his notebooks (multiple notebooks, alright, nerdy nerd) to their respective places.

And Logan damn made sure to took his sweet sweet time with it.

 “What’s your favourite song?”, he whisper-screamed to his friend.

 Their shoulders were touching and Virgil felt fuzzy in his mind.

He giggled.

This felt like a silly sleepover already and it seemed funny to him.

 Logan smiled and pulled his phone out.

 “My favourite songs is “Laws and bones break better than hearts” but I am biased”, he tapped a few icons on his phone and handed it over to Virgil for him to see a younger version of Logan.

 The younger one was still absurdly tall, still smaller than Patton - younger Patton - who was next to him. They were wearing black shirts with the band logo in front of it.

A crowd of people was behind them and Logan’s cheeks were red from heat and sweat but he was smiling and he looked breathless.

 Breathtaking, even.

 “You are biased because you went to a concert, you fucking traitor!”, Virgil exclaimed and nudged Logan’s side, “Can I swipe?”

 Logan agreed and he continued to go through the collection of pictures.

Hair disheveled and shirt too big, he was pressed against Patton and smiling into the camera.

 He barely got to see Logan so off-guard but it was.. refreshing.

It was much nicer than seeing him wear ties at work and keep going through flashcards before lessons so he could make a better impression or whatever.

 He barely knew Logan’s lips could do something as ambitious as smile so brightly.

 “You look really happy, Log..”

 He had reached the end of pictures.

It was Logan just hugging Patton close.

 “I got the tickets back there”, he explained as he took his phone back, “Patton knows nothing about any bands I like nor does he understand how I enjoy this sort of music. He just went ahead and asked random online strangers about which bands to recommend because he wanted to make my 18th birthday really special.”

 Logan’s lips formed the same alluring smile.

It was softer than feathers and lighter than wings.

He really seemed like a divine creature with his face smiling like that.

 “Looks like he got that right. I am in groups a lot and it is not that uncommon for people to ask for advice on new songs and artists but seeing a completely clueless person just join for a friend? That is wild. But it does sound like a thing Patton would do.”

 Virgil leaned back, his arms crossing behind the back of his head. He folded his hands over one another in his neck.

 “You giants are too friendly. Can’t relate.”

 His smirk was teasing.

 Logan got up and got the shirt.

 “I will sleep in this. I want to sleep in it.”

 Virgil chuckled.

 “You’re the boss, Log. I am not gonna fight you over a night shirt.”

 The nerd changed into his band merchandise and Virgil moved over to lay on his side and finish his journaling thing.

 “Diary?”

 He shook his head.

 The bed dipped next to him and the blanket started moving.

Virgil grunted back at the movement but a few more tugs had him move over so the blanket could be on top of them rather than on the bed only.

 “Journal thing for therapy. Sucks but it is also kinda helpful so I am trying to stick to it ‘n all.”

 He shrugged.

 “My favourite song is “poison”, by the way. Fucking underrated.”

 Logan laid down next to him and put his glasses aside.

 “It is a good song indeed”

 Virgil hummed.

 “ m done”

 He dropped pen and book onto his mattress.

 “uh.. let us try this.. this sleep thingy and all. Can’t go wrong, right?”

 His shoulders shrugged and he slid under the blanket with his friend. The smaller figure felt like a plank himself.

Virgil flinched and got up as soon as his whole body was in a sleeping position.

 “Fuck!”, he hissed and toppled after his notebook, “the light. Log, we are fucking stupid in the chilis tonight.”

 Logan huffed.

 “It is too late for memes, Virgil.”

 Virgil walked around to shut the light and slowly stumbled back to bed.

 “You can pull memes from my cold, dead hands, pocket protector. It is always meme time but night time is even more intense meme time.”

 “But to be fair, at least because of me you know that this is a meme”

 The blanket rustled from Logan’s body vibrating in his quiet chuckles.

 “You sending me confusing pictures and sentences during working hours is not educational.”

 Virgil settled in bed and curled up.

 “But I might have learned from it anyway, Virg.”

 It was his turn to chuckle and the emo made sure to get comfortable with his pillow from the mattress quickly being moved up to assist him.

And his blanket.

He still shared the blanket Logan was using but the more blanket, the better. Sleepy time was the perfect time to be warm and comfortable after all.

 They laid still for a bit. It was quiet and sleepy.

Outside, Roman could be heard. He was talking, probably to Patton but it was too far away to make out any words at all.

It was just Roman-ish noises.

 Roman was probably offended about something at work and needed to harass Patton about it even though that man was busy too and had worries too. Oh dear fuck, he really did.

Virgil wanted to just walk out and pull Patton into the happy slumber bed with him and Logan instead of letting him subject himself to Roman’s offended princey noises.

 Ugh...

But it was like nine in the evening and Patton would work on his study stuff before actually going to sleep. And Roman would just fuss around.

...It was already special enough Logan allowed Virgil to sleep in his bed after all they had talked about, after all he had been through.

 For some reason, he felt a bit ashamed to be in the same bed with him, to intrude so much but he quickly banished the thought.

Logan did not force himself to let Virgil into his bed. He had asked him and he was being upright about it and had napped with him before, on the same day even so.

 “Virgil?”

 The emo shifted a bit, his movements intentionally slow and uncoordinated.

He might not have been the best actor in the world but he knew how to pretend being asleep or waking up jut then and there. Years of training had taught him well.

Sometimes, experience was a much better teacher than getting a license and some degree.

 “mhm..?”

 His sounds were haphazard and sounded just silent, muffled and hidden enough to mimic the innocence of a person who was slowly detaching from the promising and sweet dreams of their mighty sleep.

 “Do you hate it here?”

 Virgil shifted more to the edge.

If he had to leap, he would.

 “What do you mean? I thought you wanted to sleep, not start a conversation.”

 He heard someone clear his throat.

Outside of their room, Roman was laughing and Virgil flinched.

A shiver ran down his spine. He pressed his eyes closed and held onto his sleeves.

 “You are not sleeping, let me talk to you.”

 He sat up and put on the lamp on the nearby nightstand.

Only Logan was enough of a person to have a night light with fancy nice light that did not hurt the tired eyes too much.

Coloured light was the only valid thing to ever exist for waking one up in the middle of the night.

 Virgil scoffed but followed his friend’s lead to sit up and whatnot.

Leaning against the wall behind him, he rubbed his eyes.

 “ugh, whatever”, he mumbled and tugged the blanket closer around him. Even then, he did not stop tugging and nudging the ends of it with his fidgety fingers, “what do you want, Log?”

 He sounded as if on trial for murdering a man and his hands were still pushing the murder weapon from one bloodied hand to the other.

 Logan meekly watched him, without glasses and only a bare minimum of light, it was difficult to make out what Virgil was doing or what he looked like.

 “Okay, okay. You go give me the talk, teach. What did I do?”

 The smaller student’s hand was hanging low and his fingers were fidgeting still as they resided in his lap.

Logan swallowed dry before he decided to answer.

 “You did not do anything, Virgil, please do not take my worries or my curiosity as offence. I was just wondering why you were so uncomfortable here.”

 The words easily made their way out of Logan’s mouth but for Virgil, they were less like releasing feathers to the wind and just watching them flow. It was pushing the big and heavy rock up the hill instead of Sisyphus and the chore was bound to never stop.

The shivers gave him goosebumps so bad he pulled his knees to his chest to preserve body warmth.

 “Who said I am?”

 Virgil was the still holding onto the metaphorical knife but it was so much easier to keep telling himself it was not him as he nodded his head as if to shake off the truth.

If he just denied the reality hard enough, maybe he could do it.

 “Virgil, please. It is obvious. Do you want me to point out every moment you made it clear you dislike being here? Only today you gave me so many pieces of evidence.”

 The friend exhaled.

His breath was a bit rocky.

Logan’s words truly had a punching effect on him.

 “If I say it, will you let me promise me to let it go and just move on already?”

 Virgil glared at him, eyes barely focusing on the man before him.

Even with the near-complete darkness they were in, Virgil could see Logan through his heavy bangs shielding his vulnerable face from the knowledgeable judge that was his nerdy friend.

 “If you are saying the truth, I might.”

 He scoffed.

 “I fucking hate you.”

His words sounded less bitter, more desperate and weak. Almost like a plead.

They were asking him not to press further on it.

 “It is him. Now good-fucking-night, Logan.”

 With that, Virgil turned around and plugged in earbuds so he could listen to something that was not Logan.

 The nerd gave up and fulfilled his side of the promise.

 It was not as if he had not expected that answer.

...He just had not expected Virgil to get so upset over it..

 The IT student called it and shut the lamp.

Despite the warmth in the bed and another person in it, he felt horribly lonely.

  It took him ages to fall asleep.

 Figuratively.

[a-deadly-serenade]

The Shield and the Sword: Chapter 9: Fickle Feelings [Alucard/Reader]

You’re a witch that is skilled in herbology, one that has been persecuted by the church for practically your entire life. In spite of this, moving throughout different towns has allowed you to pick up some chatter about a woman in a village called Lupu. She is supposed to be a wonder when it comes to medicine, and this immediately perks up your interest. So after plucking up some courage, you’ve made it to her door… hoping that she takes you as her apprentice.

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Although you could confidently say that you preferred spring and summer to the long, dreary days of impending cold brought by winter, there was a serene beauty to be found during the months of autumn. Trees shed their leaves in a beautiful array of colors, from dark browns, to bright reds and oranges, becoming a living breathing painting in the way they danced in the wind.

The ground became blanketed in plush and crunchy leaves that rustled quietly as tiny creatures made their way through the foliage in search of food and safety. Birds had begun their annual migrations to warmer territories, with only the few hardened species sticking around to conquer another harsh winter, as they had been doing for millennia.

The air was crisp, fresh, as though you were taking a bite of one of the juicy apples that had started dropping from the trees, glistening like forbidden gems in the morning dew.

Even though it made you a little sad to see the trees so barren, and the flowers slowly starting to retreat, there was an obvious relief to be felt amongst the plants. Winter was a time for them to sleep, to relax, to prepare themselves for the upcoming spring and summer. The next time you saw all of them, they would be bouncy and refreshed, full of renewed life as they greeted the warm weather with open arms.

You had also recently noticed how much extra free time you had, now that so many of the plants you tended to were beginning to retreat back to the earth. It was great to have more opportunities to fill with extra studying, or extra practice. Recently, you had taken to adapting some of the skills you learned these first few weeks working in Lupu to your magic. Some of the fairies even offered to help, with Aria and Livy being the most enthusiastic.

It was actually nice to have them collaborating with you on this endeavor. They had recently started scouting the gardens for any injured animals for you to practice on, and would take you to them once they had spotted someone in need of a little assistance. Oftentimes it would be a bird with a broken wing, but occasionally you would come across a fox with a busted leg, or a deer that had been injured fleeing from a predator.

From these sessions, you learned how to focus your energy into stopping any serious bleeding that may be occurring, both internally and externally. From there, you moved to repairing whatever it is that had been damaged. Bones took a bit more time to mend than a cut or scratch, but you were slowly building up your stamina on how long you could use your magic in order to tend to an injury.

You had yet to practice this on a human though, and considering how different and how complicated the human body was, you were more than a little skeptical of your abilities. Perhaps… it would be possible to try it on someone you trusted?

Your teeth tug into your bottom lip as you thought this over. Was it time to reveal that you were a witch to the villagers? Your patients? Your friends? It felt so…dishonest not being able to be your complete self when you were around them. It was exhausting having to put up these fronts in order to hide this part of yourself. Castlevania had been the first place outside of your coven where you felt completely authentic, and you never compromised yourself whenever you were around the Tepes family.

But, how would they react? Would they be horrified? Would they be terrified? Would they rat you out to the church and have you executed? Or… would they be understanding? Maybe even a little curious?

You let out a frustrated sigh, and looked down at the scrawl of notes you had taken about these new healing abilities of yours. This was so irritating! If only you could just use your magic while you treated people in Lupu! But of course not! Magic was somehow seen as ‘evil’ and ‘dark’, definitely not something that could benefit humanity as a whole!

Shaking your head to clear your thoughts, you got up and stretched out your arms and legs, only then realizing just how sore your back was getting; seems as though you had reverted to slouching again in your seat as you sat there pensively.

Maybe you could ask Lisa what she thought of the idea… yeah, that sounds like a fair compromise.

You raced out of your room, practically running down hallways as you sped to the laboratory on the opposite side of the castle. This is where Lisa spent most of her time, and enormous, ancient part of the castle that had once been used by Vlad, back in the day when alchemy was the talk of the town.

When you arrive at the entrance, an intimidating, iron door that had been coated in a pitch black color, you pushed it open and peeked inside.

“Lisa?” you called out, and walked in.

The floor was made of smooth marble tiles, and your footsteps hardly made a sound as you trekked across them in search of Lisa. It was with some amusement, that you noted how Vlad must be a huge fan of statues, since nearly every room you had visited was decorated with at least a handful of them. This time, they were large bronze statues of warriors with long swords and detailed shields, another nod to the Greek motif he seemed very fond of as well.

Rows and rows of tables were scattered throughout the room, each serving their own purpose as concoctions brewed or were left to sit and cure. You weren’t completely sure of everything that was going on, a lot of these instruments still being quite foreign to you. This room also held a fair amount of items Lisa claimed Vlad invented. Although, as you looked upon two large glass tankards that supposedly could create batches and batches of tonics within a mere hour, that claim slowly started to earn a bit more merit.

“Lisa?” you called out again, but still, you earned no response.

This place wasn’t that big… there was no way she wouldn’t be able to hear you. But the further in you walked, the more apparent it became that Lisa was most definitely not here.

That’s odd… you think to yourself, hands on your hips as you tried to picture where it is she could have gone.

The kitchen? But, there was still some time before lunch, it wouldn’t make sense for her to be up there right now. The garden? That might be a possibility. Or what about the medical library?

You sighed, headed out of the laboratory, and closed the door behind you. Where should you try first? You supposed that the medical library would probably be your best bet, and so you began to make your way there.

This had turned out to be a much bigger ordeal than you wanted it to be. You just needed some advice, that was all! But now it’s just turned into a wild goose chase, and you’re hoping that Lisa will be in the library so that you could actually make some progress with this!

As you dart down the last hallway, the sudden appearance of Adrian made you all but crash into a wall. Your feet awkwardly stumbled over themselves a few times as you slowed yourself down to a stop, your breath leaving you in short, shallow gasps.

“Where are you off to in such a hurry?”

Your eyes widened slightly as you looked at him, and you had to use all of the self-restraint within you to stop your jaw from hanging open in shock.

The entire time that you had been living in Castlevania, Adrian had kept his hair down, not like you could ever complain. His hair was beautiful, a light blond that shimmered golden in the sunlight, and silver in the moonlight. It complimented his elegant face beautifully, and you’d be damned if you hadn’t thought of running your fingers through his loose curls.

But today… he had tied it all back with a silk black ribbon, and stacked it in a messy bun that left a few strands to frame his face. You knew that you were staring, but you couldn’t help it. He looked so… he looked so--

“What, is there something on my face?”

His voice jolted you back to reality, and his question caused you to burst into a quiet fit of laughter.

“No… no, you just, surprised me is all.” you replied, and you felt yourself become at ease. Your gaze darted from his face to his garb, and your eyebrows furrowed in mild confusion when you realized that he was wearing a black cloak and leather riding gloves.

“Are you going somewhere?”

He appeared slightly taken aback by your question, but he quickly composed himself. “As a matter of fact, I am.”

You gave him a sly grin, as you teased, “You? Going out? Forgive me if I find that hard to believe.”

It did not appear as though he were in the same playful mood, his lips twitching for a moment before he said in a heated tone, “There are quite a few things I find hard to believe,” his voice trails off for a bit, and for a moment, you thought you could see the faintest tinge of hurt in his expression. This is quickly masked over as he looks back up at you, his gaze sending a cold chill down your spine. “But I doubt me wanting some time away from here is one of them.”

You’re frozen to the spot, absolutely baffled at what just happened. It wasn’t… you weren’t serious! It had just been a joke!  

Your own eyes narrowed at him, and you scoffed. “Fine, go!” you stepped aside and waved your arms down the hallway. “I certainly won’t stop you.”

He flinched, your scathing tone obviously doing its job as he glides past you without another word.

You felt like you could scream, like you could blast a hole into one of the walls, but… you just took a deep breath, and decided to continue on your quest to find Lisa.

Finally arriving at the medical library, you walked inside and to your surprise, you find Vlad sitting in one of the large armchairs. He had several books stacked on the small desk that stood beside him, a few of them open, even though he was currently flipping through one at the moment!

He did not seem to notice you at first, but as he looked up to attend to a steaming cup of tea, his eyes widened and he made a deep hum acknowledging your presence as he swallowed down his drink.

“Well, well, what a nice surprise,” he mused, a smile on his face. “I hardly expected any visitors today.”

You give him a shy grin in response, and slowly walked over to where he sat. “Actually, I was looking for your wife.”

“Lisa?”

You nodded. “I was hoping to get some advice on something… but I haven’t been able to find her!”

Vlad’s eyebrow raised up in confusion, and he put down his book. “Did she not tell you she left earlier this morning?”

Your mouth gaped open like a fish out of water, but then you frowned, your jaw tight and arms folded across your chest. “No, she did not…”

Vlad easily picked up how this news had absolutely soured your day, and he stood up from his seat to take a firm, yet comforting grip of your shoulder. “Do not take it too personally, little one. Lisa is infamous for leaving suddenly like this, especially during the colder months. She starts to think about one of the older women catching a cold, and then before you even know it, she’s racing out of here on Cinder with a bundle of supplies tied to his back.”

You chuckled at the image, and quickly found the tension in your body slowly seeping away. It was nearly impossible to be upset with Lisa, she was so selfless, and it warmed your heart learning how much she truly cared about the people of Lupu.

“I’d appreciate if she let me know next time, but, she obviously had her reasons.” you said, and let out a deep sigh. “It’s just… I would have really appreciate her intake on this…”

Vlad lead you over to a chair, and gestured for you to sit as he took his spot back in his armchair. “I hope that you understand that you can always come to me if you’re ever in need of someone else’s wisdom.”

You chuckled, and thank Vlad as he offers you a cup of tea. “Hmm… you may be onto something there,” you add some sugar and then take a sip, the warm brew setting your mind and body at ease.

A comfortable silence hangs in the air between the two of you, and you relished in the tranquility, utterly baffled that you had been so stressed out earlier.

You thought of what had transpired earlier between Adrian, and you inwardly cringe when you recall just how vindictive you had sounded. Although, it’s not as if you had been the only one with an attitude. Just what had gotten into him? What exactly did he mean when he said that he wanted to get away from ‘here’? Did he mean here as in, Castlevania? Why would he ever want to do that?

“Is something on your mind, little one?”

Your cheeks are tinged a light red, embarrassed that you had been so obvious. But, you tuck those specific thoughts back into some recess of your mind, instead focusing on the questions that had started this whole search in the first place.

“Do you…” you stopped, and your lips upturned into a grimace. “No, this is so stupid, I don’t know why I would ever think of such a thing--”

“I sincerely doubt that. Please, tell me,” he gave you a genuine smile and leaned forward a bit. “I have been alive for a very long time, young one. Nothing surprises me anymore.”

It was certainly a strange way to try and boost your confidence, but it definitely worked. Perhaps Vlad had been the one you were supposed to talk to after all, especially considering the fact that he was allegedly very skilled in the magical arts.

You ease yourself into the comfy armchair, fingers absentmindedly tracing around the golden rim of the teacup clasped tightly in your hands. “Well… let’s see… have you… have you ever been very public in showing off your magical abilities?”

Vlad’s eyes widened slightly, your question clearly catching even him off guard. “Are you asking me if I’ve ever performed my magic around humans?”

The tips of your ears turn a bright red, and your eyes shy away from his gaze. “It’s probably so silly,” you replied. “But… I was wanting to become more transparent with the villagers, to try and use my magic to do some real good. It’s probably just a pipe dream…”

“Now, there’s no need to say such things,” he said, and gave you a kind smile. “It’s honorable that you would think to put yourself at risk in order to help people. However,” his voice trails off, the frown on his face only cementing your previous claim at the ridiculousness of this idea.

“These are dangerous times for people like us, those skilled in the magical arts. Over the years, I’ve limited myself in how often I use magic to prevent any unwanted attention, especially now that I have a family.”

That you could definitely understand, and you suddenly felt so selfish at the idea of causing any of them harm by revealing your identity as a witch. But…

“I just… I just hate this nagging feeling,” you begin, voice a little hoarse. “I hate this idea that I can never be my true self around them because of what I am.” you sip on your tea to calm your jittering nerves, and took a deep breath. “It’s stifling.”

Vlad nodded his head in agreement. “Yes… it can be very frustrating having to deny so much in order to keep yourself out of harm’s way. You’ve heard of the nomadic tribe known as Speakers, yes?”

“Adrian mentioned them a few times during some of our lessons, but I must admit that I am quite unfamiliar with their teachings.”

Vlad waved his hand in the air, and a large red book flew off one of the shelves. Propelled by his magic, it spun around a few times before it gracefully landed on your lap, throwing itself open and flipping through hundreds of pages before stopping on a section with beautifully detailed drawings of people in long blue robes.

“I’ll be the first to admit that the Speakers were not too fond of me when they first found out who I was,” he chuckled, and stroked the end of his beard thoughtfully. “Especially when my skills in the dark arts started to make a name for themselves. So, when they found out that there was some murderous, dark, brooding vampire causing trouble up in the Wallachian mountains, they decided to find out for themselves if all the rumors were true.”

“‘Dark, brooding, murderous vampire’?” you echoed, amusement laced in your voice.

“You poke fun of me now, but…” he was silent for a moment, his grin faltering slightly. “I am not proud of the man I was before I met Lisa. The Speakers, in fact, were the first to suggest that I share my knowledge with the world. They were progressive, and the fact that they had been able to travel throughout Europe on tales of their good deeds alone was very impressive. But I was no fool. Even if I hardly left the confines of my castle, I knew that the world was changing and that sooner or later, their reputation was going to be what did them in.”

Your heart begins to race as you look down at the peaceful images of men and women using magic on the sick and injured, a foreboding feeling beginning to take hold of you as Vlad said this.

“Did…” you sense your throat starting to close up and you take another sip of tea. “Were they all… did--”

“Oh no,” Vlad reassures. “The Speakers still exist even today, but… I would be lying if I said that they had been spared the church’s wrath of persecution. Lisa tells me that nearby towns, notably Gresit, has been especially hostile towards the Speakers, claiming that they bring ill luck and evil alongside them.”

“I’d say that’s preposterous, but that seems to be the state of the country towards anyone that harbors magical abilities,” you hissed.

“Which is why I must warn you… to be cautious about who it is you reveal your secrets to. So long as the church remains in power, there is little that we can do to change public opinion.” Vlad placed his empty cup on the table in front of you, and folded his hands comfortably into his lap. “I’m sorry if this was not the answer you were looking for, little one.”

You nodded, having understood everything that he said, but you were still a little disappointed. “It’s so unfair… keeping all of this locked away. If only the church wasn’t so damn paranoid.”

Vlad laughed, a deep hearty sound that made goosebumps erupt on your arms. “That would certainly help put my mind more at ease. It worries me sometimes… that a passing stranger might one day mistake my Lisa as something far more sinister than a doctor.”

“I wouldn’t worry,” you said. “Everyone in the village loves her, I’m sure if there was ever any ill rumors floating around, that they would put a stop to it right quick.”

He let out a sigh, and nodded his head in agreement. “I suppose you are right. It’s been difficult to regain my trust in humanity, having seen so much tragedy and unnecessary bloodshed,” his gaze softens as he looks at you. “But, Lisa has changed me. She’s even suggested that I walk the Earth as a man, and nothing more.”

You blinked, and then said with a smirk on your face, “Vlad… you are a man though.”

He chuckled, and playfully ruffled your hair. “She meant that I should travel the country as men do, slowly, peacefully, making sure to take everything in.”

This concept was completely lost on you. What did he mean that he had never traveled before? How did he get here then? Had he never been on horseback? Never trekked across a steep mountain range?

“Well, how did you travel before?”

“When I was a young man, horses were the most common form of transportation. Although it’s been quite awhile since I’ve journeyed far on one. Let’s see,” he tapped his chin with his finger thoughtfully. “Oh, when I was getting the hang of my magic, I’d disguise myself as a bat and fly to nearby villages during the night.”

“A bat?” you blurted out in surprise. “That’s a bit cliche, don’t you think?”

“Where do you think the rumor of vampires turning into bats came from?” he retorted, which left you in stunned silence.

“You’re not serious… are you?”

“To be fair,” he began. “I’m not the only one in my family that can turn into an animal. My sister Stefana, can turn into a fox, which her partners find very impressive. She likes to put on a show, my sister, but she’s remained genuine for as long as we’ve both been alive so it seems fitting that’s the animal she chose.”

A sudden thought popped into your head, and before Vlad could continue going down his extensive family list, you asked, “Can Adrian turn into anything?”

Vlad paused, and then smiled as he nodded his head. “Of course, being my son, it makes sense that the magical arts come naturally to him, including transfiguration.”

“Do you have any examples?”

“Certainly. When he was around… oh, I’d say maybe ten years old, he turned into a bat. Gave his poor mother quite the shock when she couldn’t find him in his room, and she came to me, utterly hysterical, saying that he must’ve wandered off into some forbidden part of the castle. We were about to go searching for him, when a tiny white bat flew down from the ceiling and crash landed onto his bed.” he chuckled at the memory. “I was very proud, not having even the slightest inclination that he was remotely ready to perform such strong magic, but Lisa was far from relieved and Adrian received quite the scolding.”

“How cute,” you said, lips upturned into a delightful grin. “Can he still turn into a bat?”

“Oh yes, but I have not seen him do it in awhile. Recently, he’s been able to turn himself into mist.”

“Mist?” you asked skeptically. “How would that help?”

“It’s very useful, actually, being able to sneak around the castle or even outside with no one noticing. Although, that spell is more physically demanding than the others, so I’ve warned him to not abuse it too much.”

“Interesting…”

“And I understand that he’s managed to grasp turning himself into a wolf.”

Your heart stopped, the grip on your teacup going so slack that it almost slipped out of your fingers and smashed onto the hardwood floor. Did Vlad just say… that Adrian could turn into a wolf?

“Is something the matter?”

You felt a hand on your shoulder, and you shrunk  under his gaze, shakily placing your cup on its saucer. It was difficult to hide how frazzled this news had made you, but you just had to know, just needed some confirmation of the question that burned at the tip of your tongue.

“What kind of wolf can Adrian turn into?”

Vlad’s eyes lingered with unspoken concern, worried about this sudden shift in your demeanor, but still he replied, “A white one, but it has yet to be perfected. His eyes still remain bright gold, even in the form of a beast.”

“I see…” your heart felt as though it had leapt into your throat, and your mind flashed with images from your dream. This… this was impossible, right? Your grandmother had warned you time and time again that dreams were absolute bollocks, right? There was no way your subconscious was actually trying to get you to admit something you’d been stubbornly avoiding, right?

Your teeth dug into the flesh of your bottom lip, and you stood up from your seat, placing the book on Speakers onto one of the many books in Vlad’s pile. When had it become so suffocating in here? You needed to get out, you needed to take your mind off of this… development.

“Little one, did something I say upset you?” Vlad’s tall form towered over you, his face crinkled from anxiety. “If I did, I sincerely apologize--”

You cut him off with a firm no, and gently place a hand on his arm. “You did nothing to upset me, I promise. I just… I believe I need some time to… think things over. I think I should head to Lupu, perhaps seeing Lisa and the townsfolk will help put me at ease.”

Vlad nodded, visible relief washing over him as you said this. “I understand. I’m sure Lisa will be happy to see you as well,” he placed his large hand on the top of your head and delicately stroked your hair. “Have a safe journey, little one. I will be expecting your return later tonight.”

You gave him a genuine smile, and thanked him for his time and guidance, before you walked out of the library and closed the door with a quiet click.

                                        _________________

The feeling of the sun on your chilled skin and the cool autumn breeze dancing around you and Clara is exactly what you needed. You languidly stretch your arms behind your head and let out a soft sight, trying to get rid of all the tension that had seeped its way back into your muscles.

Bits and pieces of the conversation that you had with Vlad replayed in your mind, with the particular discovery of Adrian being able to transform himself into a wolf sticking out like a sore thumb. You had no time for such things… for such… foolish, almost childish notions.

Although, was it truly childish to feel certain things towards someone? Was it foolish to believe that maybe he even returned these feelings?

You shake your head, and absentmindedly begin to stroke Clara’s mane. Why would he ever return your feelings? What even were your feelings? It had all seemed so clear that night in the garden with the fairies, but the more you thought about it, the more convoluted it all became.

But there were things that you could not just chalk up to chance. The way that he looked at you during your lessons, the smile that erupted on his face whenever you got the hang of a new combat maneuver, the pink you had seen in his aura that night…

That night you were certain that he would have kissed you.

Ridiculous, you thought. Why would anyone fall in love with you? You had no money to your name, no property, and you were a danger to everyone around you should the wrong people find out about your true identity.

No… it simply made more sense to be alone, to instead focus on what you could do in the here and now, than in silly little fantasies that lived inside your dreams.

There was a bitterness in this resolution, but you did not care. It just made the most sense. After all, what sort of fool would fall in love with a witch?

The rest of the ride to Lupu went by in silence, with you admiring the wildlife and the trees to distract from the nagging feeling left behind by your earlier conclusions. Much to your surprise, it appeared as though the clinic was fairly busy, with a couple patients waiting patiently around the large apple tree that stood nearby.

After you dismounted Clara, you untied the provisions off of her back and removed her saddle and bit so that she could join Cinder in his current foraging of fallen apples and berries.

People waved and said their hello’s when they noticed you, and you happily exchanged greetings with all of them as you walked inside.

There were quite a few old folks sitting around the table, steaming cups of tea in their hands as they talked amongst one another, having a rather heated discussion on whether or not to make a batch of mucenici or papanaşi for the feast that was happening tonight.

You gave them a shy wave, the group acknowledging you with swift nods before they got back to their important conversation. You noticed that several mothers were waiting with their newborns, some of the babies sleeping soundly in their arms, while others giggled and cooed as they played with some toys or sloppily chewed on the ends of a blanket.

Although you were lacking in experience taking care of babies, you still stopped by to see what it is they each came in for, and thankfully, they all explained that they were here for their monthly checkup. The women happily toted that they had yet to suffer through a night of endless crying, from anything from an ear infection to a nasty cold.

Everyone seemed to be in such good spirits, and it made you smile, knowing that the hard work Lisa and you both did was not going under appreciated.

Speaking of Lisa, your eyes scanned the room but found no trace of her. Could she perhaps be in the back? Or maybe she had traveled to the village for a one-on-one consultation--?

“Ow! Watch it with that stuff!”

Everyone in the room simultaneously turned their attention to the door that held the laboratory, a couple of the older folks chuckling softly at the sudden outburst.

You frowned, and walked over to the door, pulling it open to reveal a very irritated Lorena and her younger sister Marian.

Marian was currently talking her sisters ear off, scolding her for what you supposed is what brought her here in the first place.

“Why don’t you ever listen to mother? She tells you all the time that you have to stop picking fights with people!”

Lorena glared at her sister, her brown eyes narrowed as her face scrunched up into a grimace. “What was I supposed to do? Just let those men behave like absolute animals?” she spat at her sister’s feet. “You’re such a coward, Marian. I couldn’t just sit back and let them treat her like that!”

Marian huffed, and threw her arms up into the air in exasperation. “Here we go again! Why do you always have to be the hero, Lorena? What if you had gotten seriously hurt?”

“It’s all worth it when I think about what could have happened had I not been there.” her voice comes out in a low hiss, but then she yelps when Lisa applies more alcohol to her wounds, deep gashes that had been slashed into her right arm.

“What happened?”

Your question seemed to finally alert the three of them of your presence, and they all simultaneously flipped their heads around to stare at you.

Lisa’s gaze softened, and her lips curled into a smile. “It’s so nice to see you, my dear. I’m terribly sorry that I left without saying anything, I just--”

“It’s okay,” you said, and sat down beside her. “When Vlad told me where you had gone off to, I knew you were only wanting to make sure everyone was doing alright.”

“And it’s a good thing I did,” she replied. “Lorena here got herself involved in quite a nasty fight.”

“Yes, I can see that,” you frowned, and gently take a hold of Lorena’s arm to more closely inspect her injuries. You shove your hand into the pocket of your cloak and procured the magnifying glass Marius had gifted you, using it to get a closer look. The cuts were clean, deep, and serrated, and as you handed her arm back to Lisa, you could surmise that they had been made from a sharp blade.

“Who did this to you?”

Lorena sighed, and cringed slightly as Lisa began to coat her arm in an ointment before wrapping it up. “I was walking through the woods in search of mushrooms and common game, hoping to help my mother a bit in finding everything we needed to make dinner. I had gone pretty deep, but I know these woods like the back of my hand, and I had been pretty excited after coming across a good stash of chanterelles and morels. I was just minding my business, when I started to hear a scuffle nearby. It sounded pretty rowdy, so naturally, I was a little curious. When I headed over to investigate, I found these two men surrounding this poor girl!”

Her nostrils flared in anger as she sat there, recalling the memory. “I dunno what they wanted with her, but they seemed pretty angry. I heard something about her people bringing “ill luck to their lands”, or something like that. It all sounded like hogwash, and she knew it too. She was feisty, I’ll give her that, she didn’t seem intimidated in the slightest. It wasn’t until I noticed the glimmer of a knife that I decided to step in. She was pretty good at fighting too, I don’t think I would have been able to take the two of them out without her help. But,” she chuckled, and looked over at her arm. “One of those bastards got me pretty good. He basically held me hostage after we knocked out his other buddy, and slit my arm a few times to try and convey how serious he was. I wasn’t scared though. I head-butted his face as hard as I could, which gave me a pretty nasty headache, but I’m pretty sure I broke his nose.”

“Was the girl alright?” you asked.

Lorena nodded her head, and flexed her arm a couple times to get a feel of the bandages. “Yeah, she was fine. Actually, she was very grateful for what I had done, saying that not many people would have risked their lives to help someone like her. Which I thought was strange.”

“Why was she surprised that you helped her?” Lisa wondered, and gathered up the dirty rags, tossing them into a boiling pot of water while she let her medical instruments soak in alcohol to be sterilized.

Lorena shrugged her shoulders. “I’m not sure… after that, she said that she needed to get back to her grandfather and vanished into the woods. Although, she was wearing a pretty strange set of robes.”

“Robes?” you repeated.

“Yeah, they were long and blue. With the hood up, I’m sure she could have easily been mistaken for a man.”

You looked over at Lisa, who’s eyes were now locked onto Lorena, and you guessed that she had the same idea you did.

“Lorena,” Lisa began, and walked back over to where she sat. “Are you telling me that you saved a Speaker?”

She blinked, her eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “What’s a Speaker?”

“Seriously?” Marian gasped, her hands on her hips. “I knew you weren’t paying attention! We read all about them in that book we borrowed from Crina. They’re that tribe of magicians! The ones that come and help people!”

You were impressed that Marian knew who the Speakers were, and you were even more impressed that Lisa’s mother appeared to know about them as well.

“Well, if she lives in a group, why was she by herself?” Lorena wondered. “That doesn’t seem like a smart thing to do, letting a girl with magical powers walk around all by herself. It’s no wonder she got herself into some trouble!”

“It’s a good thing you were there to help her,” Lisa said, eyes crinkled as she smiled down at Lorena. “Us girls need to look out for each other.”

“Exactly!” Lorena exclaimed, and jumped up onto her feet. “That’s what I’ve been trying to say to you!” she pointed an accusatory finger at her younger sister. “Why can’t you get it?”

Marian bristled, and she looked ready to pounce on her sister and give her her own set of bruises, but Lisa placed a firm hand on her shoulder.

“But you should also be more careful next time, Lorena. Those men were dangerous, and you know you only managed to get out of there from sheer luck.”

Lorena’s face softened, her gaze shifting to the side as she bit her bottom her lip. “I guess you’re right, Lisa… Maybe I should have tried using my bow instead of my fists, huh?” she gave a crooked smile, one that made Lisa chuckle, and ruffle the top of her head.

“I suppose that’s a… fair compromise. Now, run along now, I’m sure your mother must be worried sick for the both of you,” she said, and lead the two of them out of her laboratory.

Lisa sighed, and closed the door behind her, her lips pressed into a thin line. “That was an awfully frightful thing to hear,” she said, and folded her arms to her chest. “I cannot believe that the Speakers are still treated so cruelly by people.”

“Have you ever met them before?”

She nodded her head. “Oh yes. When I first met my husband, they frequented the castle almost every month. A majority of the time, they came to speak to Vlad about magic or nearby towns. It was actually with their help that I managed to persuade him to visit these places on foot alongside the Speakers, since he had never gone on a journey like that before.”

“Yes,” you said, as you recalled what Vlad had said earlier. “He said it had been quite awhile since he had walked the Earth like “men do”. I hadn’t really understood what he meant, if I’m perfectly honest.”

Lisa chuckled, and opened a cabinet that contained stacks of parchment, placing it on a counter and flipping through the pile. “My husband isn’t too fond of traveling, but we all thought it might do him some good to see who it is I’d be helping with his knowledge. I think it was a nice change of perspective, and I’d love for him to take another trip like that soon.”

“You should tell him this!” you insisted. “If you reminded him how much good his first trip did, I doubt that he’d say no to you suggesting that he go on another one. Especially now that Adrian isn’t a child anymore, and you have me to help with the clinic.”

Lisa was silent for a moment, and she hummed thoughtfully to herself as she picked out three separate pages of parchment, setting them aside for now. “You make an awfully compelling argument, little one. Perhaps I will bring up the idea to him? The worst he can say is no.”

She opened another cabinet and took out a jar from the top shelf, before she walked over and handed it to you. “I’m about to be pretty swamped with a couple baby checkups, would you mind heading over to Marius’s place and delivering this? It’s a modified version of the usual burn ointment I make him. I’ve added green tea leaves to help keep his skin from drying out from the cold weather.”

“Very nice,” you commented, and tucked it inside of your pocket. “Is there anything else that you’d like me to do while I’m in town?”

She shook her head no. “Nothing comes to mind. But feel free to look around for anything that you might need.”

You nodded, and with a wave, you exited the clinic and trekked down the dusty path that lead into the village. It was as bustling as ever, stands filled with fruits and vegetables from the last big harvest, large bonfires crackling in the wind, their heavy smokey scent mingling with that of fresh stews and roasted meats.

Leaves crunched underneath your feet as you neared Marius and Diana’s home, the distinct sound of metal being pounded into shape ringing in your ears. As you approached the entryway that leads into their workshop, a cloud of steam billowed out from the slightly ajar door and you rubbed your eyes with the back of your hands.

“Hello?” you called out. “Diana? Marius? Anyone home?”

The rhythmic clanging suddenly stopped and the sound of heavy footsteps approaching made you stop. You ruffled your cloak a bit, which caused the steam to dissipate as you met them halfway and found Marius, face beaded with sweat and apron covered in an assortment of stains.

“What a lovely surprise,” his voice is gruff, but the smile he gives you warms you down to the tips of your toes. “I did not expect a visit from you, lass.”

“Sorry to come here unannounced, I just needed to give you this,” you took the jar out of your pocket and handed it to Marius. “It’s the new and improved version of the aloe we’ve been giving to treat your burns. Lisa said that she added some green tea leaves to help alleviate any patches of dry skin.”

He happily takes it from your hands, his expression shining with gratitude. “That was awfully thoughtful of her, I appreciate the extra lengths she goes to for us. It can be very refreshing.”

“Refreshing?”

Marius grunts, and drags himself over to a chair. “It’s not often that you come across someone as selfless as her in your lifetime. I’m forever grateful that she decided to dedicate her life to helping others. It’s what she was meant to do,” he popped open the jar and began to generously apply some of the ointment onto his arms and hands. “As were you,” he adds. “I think it was fate that you two were destined to meet.”

A flush coats your cheeks, and you give Marius a small smile. “You’ve all been so kind and welcoming to me… I don’t think I could ever thank you enough. Lupu almost feels like a second home to me now.”

“I’m glad,” he said, just as his eyes suddenly went wide as the front door burst open.

In came Diana, her curly red hair tucked away from her face with a cute little headscarf, her attention currently preoccupied on the baskets of produce that she was hauling inside.

Marius got up from where he sat and greeted his wife, kissing her gingerly on the forehead as he helped put the produce safely onto the kitchen table.

“Love, look who came for a visit,” Marius said, and nudged his head in your direction.

Diana turned around and gasped, before she let out an elated sound as she ran over and gave you a tight hug. “Oh it’s so good to see you!”

You grinned, and hugged her back. “It’s good to see you too, Diana. It appears as though you had an eventful day at the market,” you look over at the wide array of food that she had brought home, and make a mental note to look for where they were selling pumpkins.

“Everything was so cheap! You know I can’t say no to a good bargain,” she gave you a cheeky smile and a wink, before she pulled out a chair and sat down beside her husband. “So, to what do we owe this pleasure?”

“Oh, I was just dropping off some new burn medicine for Marius, but… I suppose I could stay here for a bit. There was no one else in the clinic besides some new mothers, and I have a feeling that they’re going to keep Lisa preoccupied for a bit.”

Diana laughed, and fervently nodded her head in agreement. “Aye, I got a glimpse of who it was heading up there today, and if I’m right on who I think it is, they’re all first-time mother’s. They’ll probably want a full examination and then some. But anyways, what have you been up to?”

You noticed that Marius had begun sorting away all of the food Diana bought, while he let a kettle come to a boil over the fire. The fresh scent of apples lingered in the air as he chopped them up, your curiosity piqued as to what it is he might be making.

Your attention flits back to Diana, and you sighed. “Besides studying and working at the clinic? Nothing too exciting.”

“Really?” she frowns, and almost appears as though she is pouting in her seat. “Surely I thought something must be going on, what with Adrian showing up here this afternoon.”

“Huh?” you blurt out. “Adrian was here? In Lupu?”

Diana nodded her head. “I saw him while I was heading to the market. At least, I’m pretty sure it was him. I doubt there’s an abundance of tall, handsome blond men running around Wallachia.” she teased, her tongue poking out between her teeth. “Especially one that owns such a stunning steed.”

You were silent, eyes downcast and eyebrows furrowed together in disbelief. Adrian had come here? But why?

You thought back to when you last saw him, wearing his big black cloak and leather riding gloves. Is this where he had been heading before the two of you had gotten in your little argument?

Diana makes a strange sound in the back of her throat, one that makes the hair on the back of your neck stand up when you finally meet her gaze. “You didn’t know that he was coming here?” there’s a tone to her voice that you cannot decipher, and you nervously swallow a dry lump in your throat.

“No… I… well, it’s true that I may have run into him earlier today and noticed that he was wearing his riding gear but…” your own voice trails off, a heavy weight pressing down on your chest as you thought back to the… conversation the two of you had shared that morning.

Diana’s face softens, and she placed a comforting hand on top of your own. “You seem troubled, sweetheart. Did something happen?”

You let out a long, irritated sigh. “You could say that…”

“Well, you can tell me about it,” Diana said gently. “It can sometimes help--talking about things that are bothering you.”

You feel yourself clam up again, as you pondered whether or not to reveal what had transpired between the two of you. Maybe… maybe she was right, maybe getting someone else’s perspective on the matter would help you make sense of it… especially on his feelings of needing to escape the castle.

Before you could say anything, Marius reappears with some honeyed apples and a batch of fresh lavender tea. The sweet treat smelled heavenly, and it tasted just as good. The honey was sticky and delicious, and mingled wonderfully with the rich lavender tea; it was just the sort of thing you needed to help set your mind and body at ease.

You cleared your throat and dabbed your mouth with a napkin, your own subtle way of letting Diana know that you were ready to speak.

“Adrian and I had a… well, I’m not even sure I could call it a conversation. It started off harmless enough, I had made a joke saying I was surprised to see he was leaving the castle when I noticed what he was wearing. But, then he got so hostile…”

“Hostile?” Diana asked. “That doesn’t sound like him.”

“I know,” you replied. “I did not think that he would take my words so seriously… he told me that I shouldn’t be surprised that he would want some time away from home. But,” you scoffed, and swirled the tea in your cup. “I don’t know why he got so upset.”

“Hmm…” Diana leaned back in her chair, head craned up slightly in pensive thought. “Did something happen between the two of you recently?”

“What do you mean?”

“Well,” she folded her hands together and rested them on the table. “Seems to me that you were the one he was trying to avoid.”

“Me?” you gave a wry chuckle. “That’s reassuring.”

“Now, listen here,” Diana said, a stern look on her face. “Something must have happened between the two of you, something that made him feel hurt and upset. Otherwise, there’d be no need for him to be so hostile towards you. Think. There’s got to be something.”

“I’m telling you,” you snapped. “Nothing has happened between us! We’re just friends!”

“Are you sure?” Diana countered.

“What?”

“Are you sure? That you’re just friends, I mean.”

You rolled your eyes. “Of course I’m sure. We’re not secret lovers, if that’s what you’re implying.”

Diana rubbed her face, and then let out a loud cry, “You’re absolutely hopeless! How can I help you if you aren’t going to be truthful with me?”

Your face heated up a bit when she said this, and you stuttered over your words, “I… I am telling the truth!” you tried to say your words with conviction, but there was no bite to your voice, your emotions betraying you when Diana picked up on the very slight waver in your response.

“Oh really?” she sneered at you, like a cat that had just stumbled upon its prey. “What are you hiding, hmm?”

You fidgeted in your seat, and you tried your absolute best to avoid making any sort of eye contact with her. Should… should you tell her about what happened at the colosseum? You weren’t reading too much into things, right?

Diana all of a sudden let out a gasp, and her green eyes sparkled with excitement in the low light of the fire. “Don’t tell me…” she said, and lowered her voice slightly, as if trying to conceal a secret amongst the three of you--even though you were the only three in the house.

“You have a crush on Lisa’s boy.”

Your mouth hung open in shock, and you were absolutely mortified. How on Earth…? How was she able to deduce such a thing?

She let out a high pitched squeal, and wiggled excitedly in her seat. “Oh, I’m right aren’t I? You have a crush on the little Tepes boy.”

“I…” your voice was strained, the bright red blush on your face making it hard to conceal that she had practically hit the nail on the head. “I…” you tried again, but you struggled to form the right words so you just let out a frustrated sigh.

“Hey,” Diana said, all of the teasing out of her voice. “It’s alright love, there’s nothing to be ashamed of!”

You let out another hollow sigh, your fingers beginning to pick at the fraying strands of fabric from your napkin. “But then why do I feel so ashamed?”

Her expression softened, a hint of sadness finding its way into her gentle gaze. “Why would you feel ashamed, sweetheart?”

“I… I don’t know. I’ve just never thought that love was in the cards for me, that I’d rather focus on my career as a healer instead of worrying about such a thing.” you gave her a sad smile, and rested your elbows on the table as you leaned forward. “Plus… it would just be too… dangerous for me to have a romantic partner.”

“Dangerous? What do you mean?” Marius asked.

“Well…” your voice tapered off as you thought this over. You knew why it was a bad idea for someone to be involved with you romantically, but you hardly thought it prudent to tell either one of them that you were a witch. After the story Lorena had told, it suddenly made more sense as to why Vlad had refrained from using magic too often.

It’s not like they could relate to your personal fears either, it’s not everyday that someone can say that they’ve been hunted down by the church.

So, as much as it pained you to do, you decided to keep quiet. It was the smart thing to do.

“It’s… complicated.” you finally replied. “I just… this isn’t something I want to have to worry about!”

“Why are you spending your time worrying about having a crush? It’s normal! It happens to everyone!” Diana exclaimed. “To me, the more time you spend trying to convince yourself that you don’t like him, just proves that you actually do!”

“That’s absolutely ridiculous!” you countered, ears tinged red from embarrassment. “I’m… I’m trying to be logical about this.”

“That’s the problem! You can’t be logical towards your feelings, that’s not how it works!” Diana took a big gulp of tea, and then pointed a finger at you. “Something big must have happened to make you feel so… confused . What was it? Are you gonna come out with it then?”

“I…” you grit your teeth, and let out a loud groan. “I think…” you sighed, and slowly lowered your head so that it could rest on your forearms. “I think Adrian tried to kiss me the other night.”

Diana leapt out of her chair, the seat falling onto the floor with a loud thud .

“What?” she nearly hollered.

Your hands card through your hair, and you throw your head back to avoid looking at either of them. “I’m not sure, but!” you slowly eased back forward, eyes peeking out from behind your fingers. “I think he meant to kiss me that night and I… and I just… I couldn’t do it.”

Diana’s demeanor seemed to calm instantly, and she moved to sit beside you, a hand going to rest on your shoulder. “It seems to me as though you’re having quite the struggle at opening up your heart.”

You chuckled, and leaned in closer to her embrace. “You’re not the first person to tell me that. It’s just… difficult, for me to make sense of my feelings at the moment. I do care about Adrian, I care about him very deeply, but… I still need some time.”

“And that’s perfectly fine, lass.” Marius said. “Love isn’t a simple matter. It’s not something that can be left to the whimsical definitions of poets and romantics; it’s heavy, it’s messy.” he took a hold of your hand in his, which seemed so small compared to his much larger stature.

“Take all of the time you need to come to terms with your feelings. Rushing into things is what often leads to horrible mistakes, both on the battlefield and in relationships.” he gave his wife a coy smile, and then relinquished the grip he had on your hand to give you an endearing pat on the head.

“My husband is right,” Diana agreed. “You shouldn’t feel pressured, love. Although, it does sound to me that he was quite hurt at this rejection. Perhaps he’s unaware of your feelings?”

“That makes sense,” you said. “But… as I’ve said, I’m not even one-hundred percent sure about my own feelings. It… it just seems unfair for me to promise something to him and then not be able to deliver. But…” you went quiet, a frown on your face. “The least I could do is apologize for what I said today. I had been incredibly rude…”

“I’m sure that he would greatly appreciate that,” Diana replied. “I’m sure that he must be home by now, he didn’t stay long in the village after-all.”

At this, your interest is once again peaked. He hadn’t been long? Surely, you thought that he would have at least visited his mother. Why make the unnecessary trip of coming all the way here?

“Did you see where it is he went?”

Diana cocked her head to the side, and hummed quietly to herself. “I think I saw him head to the eastern part of the village,” she turned to face her husband. “What’s over there again darling?”

Marius scratched the stubble of his beard in deep thought. “Well, I ken that’s where Valeria and Tomas live, and Cordelia and her children as well. Oh… and the jeweler is over there as well.”

“The jeweler?” Diana cooed. “Now what could he be doing over there? You don’t think it has anything to do with their upcoming celebration?”

“What upcoming celebration?”

Diana gaped at you as though you had grown a second head. “You don’t know about the big party?”

You shake your head.

“The one that’s being hosted in honor of Lisa and Vlad’s twentieth anniversary?”

“Their anniversary is coming up?” you yelled out in surprise. “Why didn’t anyone tell me?”

“It isn’t happening for another two months,” Marius said, and lightly shoved Diana to snap her out of her shocked stupor. “So they probably saw it fit to tell you a little closer to the date.”

“But it’s their twentieth anniversary,” you said, still shocked at the idea of attending a party in celebration of Lisa and Vlad. “That’s a pretty big milestone.”

“Yes, and Lisa’s been telling me that family from all over are going to attend! Oh, I’m sure that night is going to be absolutely magical.” Diana sighed wistfully, and rested her head on Marius’s chest.

“Their family, huh?” you thought of the enormous, intimidating portraits that lined the hallways of Castlevania, and swallowed nervously. If there was one thing that could set your nerves on edge, it was a castle full of vampires.

“Oh, there’s something I almost forgot,” Marius said, and he hobbled over to a box that lay hidden underneath a couple of embroidery patches. He placed it gently on the table before you and pulled it open, revealing a set of matching locket’s. The craftsmanship was exquisite, the pieces decorated with tiny flowers forged of the most delicate silver, accented by the light of a beautiful gemstone that rested in the center.

You let out a quiet gasp, and gently stroked one of them with the pad of your finger. “They’re beautiful… did you… did you make them, Marius?”

He smiled sheepishly, and rubbed the back of his neck. “Aye. I thought it would be a nice gesture, a way to try and repay Lisa and her family for all that they’ve done for us. I know it’s not nearly even close to what it is they deserve, but--”

“Nonsense,” you quipped, and gave him a bright grin. “They’re going to love them.”

Your eyes lingered on the lockets once more, but then you raised an eyebrow in curiosity. “Why are you handing these to me now? Why not give it to Vlad and Lisa personally?”

“Ah, well,” Marius chuckled. “Lisa and her family travel during the holidays, not that I really blame them getting out of here before such dreadfully cold days. I believe they usually head south, to stay with some relatives.”

“So… that means I would probably go with them too then, huh?”

“‘Suppose so,” Diana replied. “But don’t you worry your head off about us darling. Consider it a vacation, they’re only really gone a few weeks.”

At this, you let out a small sigh of relief. You thought it almost reckless to leave the village up to the whims of a harsh winter whilst you relaxed in some luxurious castle in the south-side. Still… you wondered where it is they headed off to, and you hoped that these relatives of theirs would be alright with you tagging along.

But that was something to worry about for another time.

You tentatively reached to put the box containing the lockets into your pocket, halting yourself for a brief moment just to double-check that Marius really wanted you to take them.

He let out a hearty laugh, and with a fervent nod, you carefully placed the little treasures into the confines of your cloak.

“I promise to keep them hidden until Lisa and Vlad’s special day,” you said, and got up from you seat. “I believe it’s about time that I head back to the clinic, I’m sure that Lisa could use some help by now.”

The couple smiled at you, and Diana got up from her seat to give you another tight hug.

“It was so wonderful to see you again, sweetheart. I hope that our little talk didn’t end up making things more confusing for you.”

You shake your head, and gave her a genuine smile. “No, I think it actually helped me out a lot. You were right, Diana, when you said that talking about all of this would make me feel better.”

She grinned, and bopped the tip of your nose with her finger. “Never underestimate the power of a good conversation, lassy.”

You gave both her and Marius one last hug before you departed from their home and made your way back to the clinic, mind feeling a lot less clouded and heart feeling a lot less heavy.

                                            _________________

The remainder of your day spent at the clinic went by without much fuss, with Lisa actually leaving you to handle the rest of the patients that came in while she cleaned up in the back. You had been a little nervous, but she knew that you could handle it.

As you said farewell to the last patient of the day, a farmer named Mihal who had nicked himself pretty badly after shearing his sheep, you let your thoughts wander back to the time you spent with Marius and Diana.

You hoped that Adrian would be willing to see you, much less speak with you. It was difficult to dwell on just how… callous you had been that morning. It was so unlike you.

But, you thought. It’s not like he handled the situation any better.

However, you had to cut him some slack. If Diana’s presumptions held true, it only made sense that he lashed out at you, who seemed completely apathetic to the fact that there may be something more than just friendship between the two of you.

You let out a long, exhausted sigh and turned your attention over to putting away the books and notes that you’d brought along with you. You could focus on all of your confusing… feelings when you got back to Castlevania.

Making your way outside, you called out for Clara, and after a few seconds, she emerged from behind some trees on the outskirts of the large forest that stood on either side of the small village. She whinnied and trotted over to you, as she nuzzled her snout against your cheek. You gave her an affectionate pat on the head and started to get her ready for the journey back home, a little surprised when you spotted Cinder coming out of the woods only a minute or so after.

As you tugged on the straps of Clara’s saddle to make sure that everything was secure, Lisa made her way out of the clinic and locked the door behind her. Her delightful laughter rang out through the crisp twilight air as Cinder playfully nibbled on some of her hair, and she gave him a few affectionate kisses on his head before she too began getting him ready for the ride back.

The two of you silently worked on preparing your horses, and when everything was neatly packed away, you gave a quiet click of the tongue and were on your way.

Although you both had decided to make quicker haste to avoid the cold night air, that did not mean you could not have some pleasant conversations.

“Did you enjoy your time with Marius and Diana?” Lisa asked.

You suppressed the urge to look away from her when she asked this, especially considering what you three had talked about. But, you supposed this would be a fine opportunity to learn more about this anniversary party Diana had mentioned.

“Yes, Marius was very grateful for the ointment, and while I was there, I found out an interesting little tidbit of information,” you cocked your head towards Lisa and give her a devious smile.

“Oh?”

“Diana might have let slip about a certain… party, that’s coming up.”

Lisa’s eyes widened a bit, and she gave a sheepish smile as a blush decorated her cheeks. “Oh, yes… that party. I’ve been meaning to tell you about it, but I thought it more prudent to let you know when it grew closer to the actual event.”

You nodded you head. “Yeah, that’s what Marius said. I’ll admit, the thought of being in a castle full of vampires does make me a little nervous.”

She laughed. “Trust me, my dear, if you can handle living with my husband and Adrian for as long as you have, this party will be a cakewalk.”

You laughed as well, and then hummed quietly to yourself. “I mean, on the bright side, even if I turn into a nervous wreck, it’ll be a good chance to meet some of the relatives you’ve told me about.”

“Yes, that’s true,” Lisa replied. “But we’re not just inviting relatives, close family friends are coming as well. We sent out the invitations several months ago, and almost everyone has gotten back to us,” she noticed your nervous glances and waved off your concern. “Don’t fret so much, love. It’ll be fun! I’m sure everyone will want to know more about my mysterious apprentice.”

You rolled your eyes. “There’s nothing ‘mysterious’ about me. Your family will take one look--no one sniff of me, and instantly know my entire life story. As much as I hate to say it, we witches have left rather cliched stories of tragedy in our wake.”

Lisa looked over at you solemnly, and pulled Cinder over so that she could rest a hand on your shoulder. “You must stop seeing yourself in such a negative light, little one. Just look at much good you’ve accomplished within your small time of living with me,” she gave you a kind smile. “Don’t worry about what they think, the only thing that matters to me, is that you know how much we care about you.”

Shock lingered on your visage for a split second before you nodded your head, eyes shining with unspoken gratitude. “Thank you, Lisa. It’s…” your voice trails off. “It’s been… difficult, learning to accept that my life doesn’t have to be marred with tragedy. You and your family have helped make that possible. So… again, thank you.”

She gave you a smile so radiant that it could rival the sun, and even though the night slowly grew colder, it did little to put a damper on the warmth that had found a home amongst the conversations you both shared the rest of the ride home.

It wasn’t until the towering pillars of Castlevania appeared on the horizon, did the anxiety you felt towards this upcoming conversation with Adrian resurface. There was a small part of you that wanted him to be waiting outside of the stables as you and Lisa rounded the last hill, but these hopes were dashed just as quickly as they appeared.

Instead, Vlad was there to greet the two of you, and after he gave you an affectionate pat on the head, he plucked Lisa off the back of Cinder as though she weighed practically nothing, and cradled her in his arms as they kissed.

You smiled at the cute display, but there was a sadness hidden behind your eyes as you walked Clara over to her stall. It seemed so unfair that you were denying yourself the same happiness but… it was for the best. You would never be able to forgive yourself if something happened to the family that had been so kind to you all because of a small crush.

You were so lost in thought that you did not hear Vlad and Lisa enter the stables to put Cinder into his stall, and only seemed to snap out of it when they called you over.

“So,” Vlad said, a light blush decorating his pale cheeks. “Lisa tells me that you found out about our anniversary party?”

“Yes, Diana let it slip while I visited her and Marius,” you said, as you followed alongside them into the castle. “And although I am a little nervous to be around so many of your… relatives, I am excited to be apart of such a momentous occasion!”

Lisa blushed, and wrapped her arms around one of her husbands. “I can’t believe it’s already been twenty years.”

Vlad hummed in agreement. “It’s quite extraordinary. I remember the first time we ever met, as though it had happened only yesterday.”

Lisa laughed and gazed up at him adoringly. “Yes, you had been so rude, having not offered me a drink or even to take my coat. I suppose you’ve learned some more manners since we’ve been together.”

Vlad gave a hearty laugh, and gently kissed the top of her head. “For you, my dear, I would move Heaven and Earth.” his ruby eyes glanced over at you, who had been wearing a sly grin this entire time. “Something amusing, little one?”

You fold your hands behind your back and shake your head, “Noo,” you replied, in a sing-songy voice.

Lisa chuckled, and then asked, “Dear, is Adrian not home? I would have expected him to be waiting with you.”

You feel your heartbeat quicken a bit, and you silently kick yourself for how eagerly you await Vlad’s answer with baited breath.

“He is. Last time I saw him, he was heading down to the colosseum to get some practice.”

Lisa made an irritated sound in the back of her throat. “I wish he would find some place else to train… that place is still crawling with monsters.”

“Monsters?” you echoed, and stopped in your tracks.

They both turned to look at you, and the stare that Lisa was giving Vlad, made it very apparent that he was going to be the one having to answer this one.

“Well, you see,” he began, and nervously rubbed the back of his neck. “As I mentioned during our previous conversation, I used to be… quite a household name, but not because of my generosity in the academics. The number of creatures that live within these halls has substantially decreased since those days, but I still keep a few around for protection.”

“Protection from what?” you asked, skeptical that anybody would willingly try and break into Castlevania.

“I ask myself the same question,” Lisa said, a frown on her face.

Vlad fidgeted nervously where he stood, not used to such scrutiny from his own wife. “Well… you never know. It would be foolish for me to simply rely on myself to protect my home if that time ever came. I find it reassuring to know that there are other means in which I can defend my home.”

You were silent for a moment, but then slowly nodded your head. “I mean… that makes sense.”

Lisa gaped at you, clearly unprepared for that response.

“What?” you replied. “I doubt that they would ever harm you or Adrian. They work for Dracula. I’m sure if you so much lost a single hair from your head, they’d be done for.”

Vlad nodded his head in agreement. “Precisely. I also think it’s good practice for Adrian. If he knows how to take down a supernatural beast, he’d hardly work up a sweat against a human opponent.”

Lisa still looked far some pleased, obviously annoyed that you had taken Vlad’s side on this. “It still makes me nervous. What if something were to happen to him while he was down there?”

“Nonsense,” Vlad said. “This is Adrian that we’re talking about, our son. He’s perfectly capable of defending himself.”

She looked as though she had more to say on the matter, but, Lisa decided to table it with a resounding sigh. “Alright, as long as you have confidence in him!” she snapped. “Now, what do you say I fix you two up something to eat?”

As much as you wanted to join them, this nagging feeling in the back of your mind told that you should just head down to the colosseum and get this conversation over with. So you declined Lisa’s kind offer, and told them that you were going to join Adrian, who warned you to stay as far away from whatever monster he was facing.

The thought of seeing a monster caused a chill to seep into the very marrow of your bones, and you wondered just what exactly lurked within the dark, ancient halls of this castle.

When you were little, you had read the tales of infamous Greek monsters, of minotaurs hiding amongst the twisting turns of a giant labyrinth and of vicious chimeras incinerating anything in their path with their fiery breath. Closer to home, there were stories of hellhounds stalking nearby cemeteries, waiting to pounce on anyone unlucky enough to come across them, and of wailing banshees and vindictive spirits haunting homes for generations.

Your nerves were on edge as you walked down the long hallway of the marble gallery, your magic tingling through your veins in preparation to defend yourself from anything that decided to make itself known. You had to keep reminding yourself that these creatures would never harm anyone Vlad believed to be a part of his family, so, you marched forward, and tried to keep a clear mind.

When you finally made it to the old, withering door that lead to the narrow winding staircase, you pushed it open, startled when you come face-to-face with…

“Aria?”

The tiny fairy looked absolutely frazzled, and her big blue eyes widened in surprise when she realized who she had run into. “Thank goodness!” she cried out, and grabbed a hold of your hand. “You must come at once! Adrian he… he…” tears welled in her eyes and she tugged you forward.

Your throat goes dry, and you bring her closer to you. “What’s happened?”

She sniffled, and pulled on your hand again. “He needs your help! Please… please hurry!”

You waste no time in heeding her pleas and take down the stairs at once, going down them as fast as your legs would allow. Your heart is hammering in your chest, and by the time you reach the entrance to the colosseum, you’re panting and your forehead is covered in a sheen of sweat.

The eerie blue glow of the flames cast an ominous shadow onto the colosseum grounds, the putrid stench of evil lingering within the atmosphere. When you finally see what Aria was talking about, your legs are frozen to the spot

Adrian. On the ground. Covered in blood.

You run to him and all but collapse beside him, hands shaking as you quickly scan him over to assess the damage. He lets out a low grunt when your fingers prod at his chest, ripping apart the fabric of his shirt so that you could get a better look at the entry wound.

It was clean, but it looked deep. Your hands move to rest on his chest, and immediately notice how shallow his breathing is, coming to the conclusion that the stab had gone clean through the ribs and punctured his lung.

You feel tears prick at the corner of your eyes when you glance up and see that he’s looking at you, a small smile on his lips.

“Aren’t I lucky that you came down here so quickly?”

“What happened?” you snapped, irritated at the tears that managed to slip past your defenses. You stubbornly wiped them away with your free hand, and it was then that you saw his sword, tossed aside, tip covered in blood.

“I had,” he winced as you apply pressure. “I had been practicing against some of the monsters… seems as though one of them got the better of me.”

“You absolute fool,” you whispered, and pointed at his sword. “Why did you take it out? Didn’t your mother ever teach you to never pull out the foreign object involved in a stab wound?” your voice is hoarse, and panic starts to set in as more and more of his blood coats your hands.

He chuckled weakly. “I thought I might try seeing how much my healing magic has improved…” he glanced down at his wound, and flinched. “Seems as if I still have a way to go.”

How could he be acting so nonchalant about this? This wound was serious. If he didn’t get proper medical treatment immediately he could… he could--

“Aria,” you said, and she flew over to you. “Go and get Lisa. Tell her what happened. I’ll try and stop the bleeding, but I’m going to need her help in order to--”

“No!” Adrian hissed, and took a firm hold of your wrist. “If I wanted my mother’s help, I would have sent for her.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” you quipped. “I’m not equipped to deal with this.”

“Yes, you are.”

His grip slackens, and his hand goes to rest on top of yours. “I believe in you.”

You choke back more tears, and your hollow laughter rings out into the still air of the colosseum. “You believe in me? ” you bite down hard on your lower lip to keep it from trembling. “Even…” you let out a stuttering gasp. “Even after what happened today?”

His golden eyes soften, and he nods his head. “Of course. I… I was actually down here trying to get myself into a clearer state of mind before coming to talk to you.” he’s silent for a moment, a shallow breath slipping past his lips. “I wanted… I wanted to apologize,” the grip on your hand tightens for just a moment. “What I said earlier… it was--”

You silence him with a shake of your head, not needing to hear what you already knew. “It’s alright… it’s alright,” you said, and gently removed your hand from his hold on you so that you could place both of them over his wound. “Everything is going to be okay.”

Closing your eyes and taking a deep breath, you focus on stopping the bleeding and closing the wound, as you had done to so many animals. You had to let go of your anxieties to truly let your magic do its work, and believe in the intent that you carried within you to heal Adrian… to save him. A warm feeling bubbled within your chest, your magic flowing through your fingers like a stream of liquid gold.

You thought of all the anatomy lessons Lisa had painstakingly gone through with you, and you pictured the lungs, the right one specifically. In your mind you could see every individual cell, every vein, and every nerve. It needed to be stitched back together, the cell walls, the tissue, the skin… and the blood needed to clot, needed to stop.

There’s a tingling at the very ends of your fingertips, a sensation that travels up your entire body and eventually expels from you in a long, arduous sigh. You feel light headed, and sweat drips down your back, but when you open your eyes, his wound is gone, and the only indication that he had ever been injured is a small scar located at the entry-point.

Your arms are shaking, and you’re struggling to keep yourself up right, but you could not hide the utter elation that fills you up at such a momentous success.

“I can’t believe I did it…” you whispered.

Adrian smiled weakly and placed one of your hands over his heart, its rhythmic beating setting your mind at ease. “I never doubted you for a second.”

There’s a small tug at your hair, and you turn to find Aria, tears flowing down her face that she wipes away with said strand.

“You’re…” she sniffled. “You’re so amazing. I can’t believe you did that!”

You delicately cup her in one of your hands and set her on your shoulder. “It’s all because of your quick haste to find help that I was even able to save him, small lady. So, thank you.”

Aria let out a dramatic wail, and wiped more tears from her eyes. “Whatever did we do to deserve you!”

The moment is unfortunately cut short when a foreboding feeling settles at the base of your spine, and you sense dozens, if not hundreds of eyes on the three of you. Your head shoots up to look into the stands, and your skin crawls at the sight.

Monsters, of all shapes and sizes, stood watch in the seats.

Skeletons wielding swords and lances clatter noisily to one another, while giant, leathery, bipedal birds wielding long spears glare down at you with their beady yellow eyes. Strange gargoyle like creatures, their mouths filled with rows of razor sharp teeth, cackled from up above, while giant wolf-like beasts howled and stomped their giant paws onto the marbled flooring.

“Begone!” Adrian shouted, and grit his teeth as he struggled to get up on his feet. “As your master, I command you to leave this place at once!”

“You are no master of mine.”

The hair on the back of your neck stands up as an otherworldly voice echoes throughout the stadium. The monsters in the stands recoil at the sound, silencing almost instantly, and from one of the nearby entrances, emerged a group of powerful, intimidating monsters.

Knights adorned in thick, steel armor galloped in on horses… horses that appeared to be missing the lower half of their body. Their steeds were unlike any that you had ever seen, decaying and rotten, with their intestines hanging out from where they’d been chopped in half. In their hands they each held a long, deadly lance, raised at the ready to attack.

Beside them stood another group of knights, but they were much too tall for it to be a human residing within the sturdy, blue colored steel. They stood nearly shoulder-to-shoulder with the monstrous horses, and grasped tightly in their massive hands, were a large steel shield and an enormous ax.

You quickly stood up and put yourself between them and Adrian, staring them down with all of the courage that you could muster.

“What is it you want?” you demanded.

“Ah, so you’re the one that emitted such… deliciously powerful magic,” one of the horse-back knights cooed.

“We can’t tell you how surprised we were when we found out that our Lord and Master allowed a witch to walk these sacred halls,” another one spat. “We thought it had been an utter disgrace… that is, until now.”

Their horses let out deep, guttural cries that turned your stomach to knots, as their masters commanded them slowly forward.

“Stay back!” Adrian yelled, his legs wobbling as he stood up off the ground. He grunted from the effort, and almost collapsed back onto the floor, had you not caught him and let him lean against you for support. “I am the Prince of Darkness, son of Vlad Dracula Tepes, and as such, I command you to let us be on our way!”

The knights chuckled, and simultaneously raised their lances.

“You are nothing more than a pathetic child,” one of them hissed. “A petulant brat that assumes he can command us as though he were his own father. Imagine.”

They all laughed, an empty sound that made goosebumps erupt on your skin.

“Please,” you pleaded. “Just let us be on our way, and I promise not to tell Vlad what happened here.”

“Silence witch!” one snarled. “How dare you speak our Master’s name. You were foolish to come down here alone.”

“We never saw what he saw in you, but now…” one cackled beneath their helmet. “We understand everything completely.”

“What do you mean?” you try with everything in your power to not let your voice waver and reveal how terrified you truly are, but there was only so much you could do.

“Your power… it calls out to us.” One said.

“So delicious… so tempting.” Said another.

“We have waited so long… so long for something like this… we won’t let you take this opportunity away from us.”

All at once, the group of monsters began to close in on the three of you, their weapons raised and poised ready to attack.

“Stay back!” Adrian shouted again, and with a wave of his arm, his sword came flying into his hand. “I won’t allow you to continue so much as looking at her, you vile beasts!”

“Pathetic,” one of them said, and before you could even react, one of the larger ax knights had knocked Adrian out of the way with a swing of their shield.

“Adrian!” you cried out, and made to go after him, but you were stopped by a lance being pointed at your throat.

“It would be wise for you to follow our orders, lest a more serious fate befell your so-called Prince of Darkness.”

You could hear Aria crying out for Adrian to wake up, begging him to get up and save you, and in that moment, where you could cry, where you could scream, where you could plead for your life… you remained silent.

This… you had seen all of this before, you had felt all of this before… this feeling of hopelessness… this feeling of tragedy…

A loud ringing fills your ears, and everything appears as though its moving in slow motion.

Yes… it’s just as you predicted… You’ve failed to protect to protect the ones you care about from harm. Again. You’re going to lose everything. Again. All because you’re a witch.

The cacophony of laughter from the knights swirls around you like a tempest, and even though you’ve conceded yourself to this fate… there’s that tug.

No… a voice rings out in your head. No more… no more… No. More.

You glare up at the monsters before you, a renewed vigor in your gaze and confidence in your gait. “My life… my life is one that has been filled with one calamity after another. I thought I was doomed, cursed , to never again find even some semblance of happiness,” you chuckled, something that stops the knights in their tracks.

“But then… I met Lisa. I met Adrian. I met Vlad. They’ve helped give my life purpose, they’ve helped me understand that even someone like me deserves a chance at a happy life… at a good life…” your hands balled up into fists and you took a step forward, staring down the knight before you with the coldest look you could invoke.

“I won’t let you take that away from me.”

What happened next… you weren’t exactly sure. The last thing you remember seeing is the silver glint of their weapons being raised, before a bright blue light consumed everything in the room. Your vision had gone white, and by the time your bleary eyes managed to refocus on your surroundings, the only thing left of those monsters, were piles and piles of ash.

“Wh… what?” you gasped, suddenly keeling over as your head pounded from a terrible headache. You groaned out in pain, and tears caused your vision to go blurry again as you looked upon the ashes scattered around the colosseum.

Where did the knights go?

You heard your name being called out, but it sounded so distant, so… fuzzy.

Did I kill all those monsters…?

“What… happened…?” you muttered weakly, as you collapsed onto the floor; Adrian’s bright gold eyes being the last thing you saw before the darkness consumed you.

[supergenial]

Three Houses sucks actually

It’s been a whole month so after about 180 hours of play and doing all four routes, I thought I’d write down all the minor nitpicks that upset me about this fantastic game. Obviously spoilers ahead.

First of all, I do think it’s a great game, it’s one of my favorite fire emblem titles so far. I will not claim to be a veteran, but I have been playing since the gba games, I’ve played every game between fe6 and three houses, even fe12. I know genealogy is supposed to be GOAT but I’m holding out for a remake like I did with gaiden (and boy, waiting payed up big time on that one). Also if you love this game and think it’s perfect, that is awesome, I urge you to not read this so you don’t get upset about someone not understanding the game that you love (even though I love it too). Anyway, let’s begin:

I. The Four Routes are bad (together)

This game presents the player with a choice of 3 houses they can join, with that decision deciding which story you actually get to see. Along with Lion, Eagle and Deer, there’s also a “Church” route that is kind of lame, but not game-ruining. On their own they’re all actually pretty darn good stories. But these routes are extremely flawed. Not intrinsically, mind-you, but rather as a whole. In a game with multiple routes, you’d expect them to complement each other but instead each route actively makes the other ones actually worse. Do keep in mind that I think each route is pretty good on it’s own (even church) whichever one you pick first you will enjoy it greatly, and it will only deteriorate as you progress through the others.

Edelgard’s route is a political story of a revolutionary who wants to crush aristocracy and replace it with a meritocracy, her objective therefore is to crush the church that oversees the 3 nations. It feels like something out of shin megami tensei, she’s basically a chaos hero (which I usually hate) but with some nuance and less insane. It’s a great route! Gameplay-wise, it is my favorite, and also has the most thematic cohesion with the early game where all the students have misgivings about their noble status. Problem is it would have you believe that Dimitri has a complex ideological reason for standing up against her and protecting the church, when in reality playing his route tells you that he really has no political ideologies that he believes in (he straight up says this to Mercedes in their A support), he’s just a king defending his territory, which is really underwhelming as he has no parallels or contrasting motifs in regards to her, he’s just a dude. Another awful thing that basically everyone agrees is bad about this route is Those Who Slither in the Dark, a group that is set up as villains that have to be defeated, but instead get dealt with off-screen in the epilogue. You’d think it’s because they were lazy, and didn’t want to make a level for them, but there’s 2 routes in which you do fight them, they have their own level already in the game, it’s just not in this route. The plotline then just feels very lazy and incomplete, but even moreso once you play Claude’s route and you just... you just fight against those who slither, which is all I wanted to do at the end of Edelgard’s route. Perhaps the most disappointing route, but I happen to have an affinity for disappointment and the themes it goes for.

Dimtri’s route is a fantastic story of a broken man reclaiming his sanity. It’s the most character-driven and the most emotionally charged of the three. It’s an amazing route! Easily the best written as it picks a single theme (Dimitri’s downfall and rise) and does it extremely well instead of spreading too wide and losing focus. The ending is a bit underwhelming though. Basically everything after Dimitri recovers his humanity feels like filler, though his A supports are really amazing, all of them, making his post-feral phase worth it. The bigger problem is that this route actively sabotages the player’s enthusiasm towards playing Edelgard’s route as it paints her as the ultimate evil, the True and Only villain that has to be defeated. As such, a lot of the reaction I’ve seen online is that people who play this one first flat out refuse to play Edelgard’s route because really, why would you? She’s badbadnotgood, her sanity and reasoning are as flimsy as it gets, and she broke Dimitri’s heart when he was a kid, along with killing his entire family according to this route. You’d have to be insane to be excited to play as her, it’s something you’d only do for the sake of completionism. In the church and deer route you fight Edelgard too, but she’s presented as a well-intentioned extremist rather than an evil snake. Yes, even in the church route, the very one thing she wants to destroy!

Claude’s route on the other hand is so complete it suffers from it. It goes over every major plotline and actually solves it with very little thematic resonance between it all. Those who slide? He takes care of them. Rhea’s misdeeds? They’re acknowledged. Edelgard isn’t insane? He agrees. Who exactly was Nemesis?(the very first cutscene we’re shown!) Got it too. What is Sothis, what happened to her, why is she bound to Byleth? Got it. His route is ridiculous in that it covers too much ground and lore that could’ve been better put in the church route as it has no real thematic cohesion with Claude. He wants to end racism or something, ok cool, but he never fights any “race-realists”, none of the villains in his route are diametrically opposed to his ideals, and his final boss is a last minute diabolus ex machina with no real theme to it. It would’ve been easy to drive the point further that by beating the deadlords they’re burying the prejudices of the past and forging a new world without their literal ancestors hanging over them, but instead the scene goes for a sort of power of friendship type of feel and just rolls with that. It’s an exciting route with many hype moments, but when put together with the other ones, it feels kind of really weird that his route is basically a lore dump to fill in the lore gaps rather than a story about something.

It’s a given that in a game with 3 routes each one would tell their side of their story and be somewhat incomplete, leading the player to play all three to get the whole story. Instead these 3 routes actively try to drag each other lower instead of boosting each other higher, which is really disappointing. 

Don’t even get me started on the church route, that shouldn’t even be in the game at all. It’s the same as Claude’s route, the exact same, but without Claude. Ok so that means Seteth gets a lot of development in this route right? No, not really, he’s just kind of there. Rather than Seteth being the lord of the route it’s more like this is a lord-less route. Ghost Dimitri is a really cool scene, for sure, but outside of that seriously screw this route. You might think “well but I like Rhea, I want to be on her side”, well spoiler alert kiddo: you literally fight Rhea in this route, she’s the final boss. And you don’t get to hang out with her all that much either so forget about that. While I dislike Rhea, I think having a route for her is reasonable since that sickening mommy fetish is so popular these days so of course you’d want to pander to that audience for that sweet cash, but people who like Rhea don’t even get that because you have to actually kill her at the end (which I actually really like, it made the church route Actually Good for me, plus it’s a really fun level despite being yet another fight at Garreg Mach, more on that later). Also in this route you don’t get to see Rhea in her Seiros armor that is 10/10 hot as shit so why even bother, go play Edelgard’s route if you want to see some actually cool Rhea scenes and quotes.

edit: just been informed Rhea does live if you S-support her, kind of disappointed but ok, that’s pretty good for all who liked her and it makes sense.

II. Claude, the master tactician

“Ugh, don’t call me that”, Even he’s fed up with the title

My favorite of the three lords in the game is easily Claude but it’s pretty unfair that he survives every single route (unless you actively choose not to spare him in Edelgard’s route), whereas Dimitri and Edelgard always die outside of their routes. But that’s not the worst of him, what I hate about him is how he gets hyped up as THE MASTER STRATEGIST whenever other characters speak of him. Granted, writing a “Smart” character is hard because you have to be smart or else the readers won’t buy it, but the writers don’t even try and instead make him out to be a complete fool in almost every route (he’s actually pretty smart in the church route imo, but he’s also never seen in that one).

In his route, he does exhibit some degree of strategy and thought, devising a trap to protect Garreg Mach (by setting his allies on fire???) and doing a bit of a Trojan Horse when seizing Fort Merceus. However, if you play Dimitri’s route, Gilbert suggests doing the fire thing, and in the church route you just infiltrate Fort Merceus in the exact same way. So congratulations Claude, you’re about as smart as... Gilbert, a character that no one ever refers to as a strategic or military genius. This is another case of routes weighting down other routes, if you only play his route you think “oh yeah, he’s smart, he Trojan Horse’d the empire, what an absolute madlad”, but once you play the other routes it’s like, oh, ok, I guess that’s just meant to happen that way whichever side you choose.

Ok, maybe he’s not a genius master strategist in his story, sure, after all Byleth is the tactician so of course he’d take a back seat, but what about as an enemy commander? he’s gotta have some devious map design to back up his claim to genius, right? Wrong.

In Dimitri’s route you fight Claude and Edelgard post-timeskip at Gronder Field just like you did before the timeskip. In this battle, Claude’s objective is to stop Edelgard. You think to yourself, oh that’s wonderful, an ally! Together we’ll crush that evil snake together! Except his army focuses yours, instead of going straight for Edelgard, as he did in the very same battle pre-timeskip. The game says there’s some fog, but guess what, this game HAS a fog mechanic to make some maps have low-visibility, and that fog is not present in this map! As such, he comes off as a total doofus in this chapter. This battle feels like Batman v Superman, a fight that just “has” to happen to sell the idea that the heroes are against each other, but Batman and Superman shouldn’t be fighting at all to begin with, they’re on the same side! They only fight because it’s the “hype” thing to do. Sigh.

Later on in the same route Claude is attacked by the empire in his hometown. His “master strategy” is to corner himself against an army that outnumbers his army 10:1, and trust that Dimitri will save him, the very same Dimitri that nearly killed him a couple days ago at Gronder Field. This is a pretty stupid and naive strategy on it’s own, but it gets worse once you look at the enemy troops in this map. They are all horses or infantry, not a single flier. Claude himself, he rides a wyvern. He could’ve escaped out to the sea, you might even think that’s his plan, but no, because Judith is there in the map and she certainly isn’t riding a wyvern, same goes for all his other men. Imagine the mockery, the sheer audacity of driving your enemy into a corner and thinking you’ll kill him only for all his men to suddenly get on wyverns and escape from you, which is possible thanks to the mount/unmount mechanic. Just imagine, you’re trying to save him and upon reaching halfway through the map, he and all his men get on wyverns and escape, saying they’ll trust you to take care of the empire as they run away, as you realize he just fooled you into taking out the trash for him. It would’ve been awesome! A moment worthy of The Master Trickster, but no, you just have to kill the boss before he kills Claude and Judith and that’s the map, that’s the whole thing.

And don’t even get me started on his map on Edelgard’s route. For a whole month people hype Claude up to be John Von Neumann combined with The Joker and Sun Tzu, so I’m expecting his level to be a really twisted one: warps, damaging terrain, falco knights with horse slayers, ballistae, swordmasters with armorslayers, siege tomes, sleep staves, berserk staves, etc. Instead, the level in which you fight against Claude has basically 0 unusual terrains, his “master strategy” is to just call for reinforcements until you cut off the source of reinforcements. This means that his “incredibly genius master tactic of galaxy-brain depth” is to use brute force, which is literally the exact opposite of clever tactics. Needless to say, this was to me the biggest disappointment, really wasted that opportunity to make a level that’s actually unique.

Then you go on to fight Dimitri’s right afterwards and guess what: his map has a siege tome user(with decent crit rate!), it has a unique monster gimmick where you have to kill an enemy every turn to avoid them turning into monsters, it has 4 commanders all calling for reinforcements leaving you to choose wisely which one needs to be stopped first, it has a river separating both sides of the map so that your teams have to be cleanly split up if going for multiple objectives, etc. It’s my favorite level in the game because it’s well thought out, interesting and basically more like what you’d expect of the mission where you’d fight a tactical mastermind. Sigh.

III. Ideological Conflict (a lack of it)

This is my biggest issue with the game

I really memed myself playing Edelgard's route so early because as I said previously it feels like a shin megami tensei chaos-route. She is fighting for an ideal, and so I falsely developed the hope that the game would have an ideological conflict. If you play Claude's route, you see that he is also fighting for his ideals, dude wants to end racism, that is awesome! However even when the characters do fight each other, their ideals are never in conflict. In Edelgard’s paralogue you fend off an almyrian invasion but she tells Byleth that she wishes they could be allies, and that in the future they should sit down and talk with almyrians to make their relationship better. In Claude’s route he is often fed up with the church’s historical revisionism and you can see he holds a lot of contempt for the institution as a whole. Edelgard and Claude may fight each other due to circumstance but their ideals are never against each other, in fact they kind of want the same things. And surely enough, Dimitri also thinks racism is whack, which is mostly explored through his relationship with Dedue. But Dimitri just doesn’t really believe in anything, in his route he’s completely reactive to the forces around him, there’s just no ideal world that he’s working towards, instead he just deals with the bullshit others have set in his way (not that there’s anything actually wrong with that, it’s just really underwhelming when the other stories are about ideals). 

And really that’s ok. Like I said this is a problem of my own I memed myself into thinking I was playing a much better game, and only have myself to blame for those expectations. It’s very normal of intelligent systems to not want to put into the game a playable character who is racist or anti-equality. Except we have Lorenz and Ferdinand, two characters that are so fiercely pro-aristocracy I started the game hating them(nowadays Ferdinand is easily in my top 5). Ferdinand believes that nobility is a cross to be carried for the good of the people and that rather than a highway to an easy life, it is a tremendous responsibility to bear and that commoners are better off relying on a noble like himself to make their lives better.

Nobility being a cross is something supported by the narrative! There are many characters dissatisfied with their lives solely because they were born as nobles and have to deal with problems exclusive to nobles, most notably Sylvain, Ingrid and then Mercedes who straight up becomes a commoner because of the pressure of nobility. Lorenz on the other hand has been pressured by his family so much he’s a completely brainwashed tool of the aristocrats, but as the game progresses he gets his head out of his ass and becomes a more likeable character. 

“Edelgard intends to abolish the nobility, but I know I can disuade her”, Ferdinand you bumbling fool, that is literally her main policy, have you ever actually listened to her?

Those two show it is possible for the team to write characters with bad ideals and then develop them into likeable ones, they just didn’t feel like having a lord that upholds bad ideals and grows out of them or is betrayed by their shortcomings. Hell, just imagine if after the last chapter in black eagles those who slither betrayed Edelgard instantly, showing that allying yourself with villainous people only because they’re convenient is sure to lead to betrayal. It would’ve been a sobering moment to see her say that maybe, maybe pairing up with mustache-twirling bad guys might have been a bad idea after all and having to really consider the damage she might have caused by letting them co-exist with her for her goals. Instead her route just ends, significantly shorter than all others. Aghhh. But yeah, this is a problem of my own expectations because fire emblem never had amazingly complex stories to begin with (I know I know, genealogy is supposed to be pretty deep, but that was over 20 years ago, it’s just not relevant to modern fire emblem until it gets a remake).

“Wait so you want Dimitri to be racist?” Oh hell no. Dimitri is literally perfect as he is, just look at him. What I’m saying is he should’ve gotten his own game, because he doesn’t fit in with the other two lords in this game as he has no vision of how the world should be (other than “Good”) and no ideological struggle he needs the world to understand. His story just doesn’t need Fodlan. The kicker is that his house, were it not for their tight and adorable friendship, is the one that is more likely to side with Edelgard as Sylvain, Mercedes, Ingrid, and Felix all hate nobility/aristocracy, and Ashe’s dad whom he idolizes literally gets sentenced to death by the church. Dimitri on a solo game would’ve been a cool story (better than Fates that’s for sure). But in three houses he doesn’t complement the other two lords, and the other two lords also bring him down. It’s what I’ve been saying: the routes just don’t complement each other. Remember how I said many people played Blue Lions and then just flat out refused to play the other routes? It sounded like I was belittling them but those people were right, they’re living their best life and I applaud them, they truly beat the game.

Worth noting that the church route is technically, from an outside perspective, a pro-aristocracy route. The black eagles students are all aristocrats except for Dorothea, and in this route it’d be a fair observation to say that they’re a bunch of spoiled kids who are trying to preserve the status-quo because they don’t want to give up their lands and servants. Obviously this isn’t how the route approaches character motivations, but an incisive in-world historian would’ve made this scathing observation by simply looking at who’s spearheading the revolt against the emperor: a bunch of rich kids.

IV. The Pre-Timeskip common route (FOUR times)

Moving onto gameplay-related nitpicks: what were they thinking? There’s like 13 chapters before the timeskip in every route, and they are always the same missions regardless of which house you choose. One of them is to kill Ashe’s dad and the other one is to kill Sylvain’s brother, you would think those missions would be exclusive to the blue lions and that other routes would have an equivalent for them: a story that hits home, that gets personal with one of the characters you chose and more importantly that just plays differently across all the routes. Instead the game would have you play the same missions 4 times so that you end up dreading the sight of them, on top of them having no real relation to the characters you’re using in 3/4ths of the routes. If the dlc route has me defend Garreg Mach even one more time, I’ll just go insane. Speaking of that:

V. Dimitri, Claude and Church route all have same maps

If you feel like playing all four routes, it’s gonna feel like you’re just playing the exact same game over and over. The maps you play in are literally all the same. And Edelgard isn’t scot-free either, but at least in her maps you fight from the other perspective of the map you know, you’re at least coming at it from another angle (though she will still have you defend Garreg Mach post-timeskip, completely negating the pleasure of not doing that pre-timeskip). I get it: these maps are huge, and they’re highly detailed because you can zoom in and literally see the battalions and all that, it’s really super neat and takes a lot of time to make so you can’t just have a hundred maps. But I mean by the end of the game (that is, playing all four routes) looking at any of the maps feels so tiring. I feel like I might just never replay any of the routes at least for a very long time because I’ve grown sick of seeing them over and over and over so many times. And dear lord, if I have to play Flayn’s paralogue one more time without fliers I’ll just shoot myself. Speaking of fliers.

VI. Fliers are absurdly broken

Literally what were they thinking. Wyvern Riders have absolutely insane stats and thanks to the dismount feature, they lose nothing by being in that class. The last levels in Claude and Edelgard’s routes are severely favored toward fliers too, both of them featuring tons of damaging terrain that is hard to cross for horses, though at least Nemesis has the decency of having many ballistae set up (probably because Claude himself is a flier so they expect you to have at least one). Also all that damaging terrain screws over horses because they thought horses were broken or something. But really, you’d think mobility is such an important stat that they’d compensate for it elsewhere, but no, all you lose is the opportunity cost of not having more crit as a war master (which female characters don’t have access to anyway) or being able to use magic. And horse units just get screwed over in every conceivable way, you’d expect that they at least get some beefy additional stats over wyvern riders but instead they’re actually weaker since wyverns are faster and speed is such an important stat. Also wyverns have so much defense that even in hard mode arrows (their supposed weakness) will have trouble denting them (or even hitting them thanks to their extremely high avoid).

edit: I also invite you to look at the growth rate modifiers for each class and see that all horse classes provide a negative speed growth rate, which is bad enough without realizing that wyverns are so minmaxed they even provide a cute minus 5 magic as a “balance” while getting boosts to both defense and speed in their final class. Are you kidding me? Horses are basically a player trap, they look cool and they’re half the master classes so they gotta be useful, right? Couldn’t be more wrong. Also what’s the deal with mortal savant providing -10% speed growth, that shit is bananas, how could the Naruto class hamper your speed if Naruto is all about that running, IT’S INSANE.

This is all exacerbated once you go for a low-turn-count playthrough, a fairly popular style of play among fans of the series where as the name indicates you try to beat the levels in as few turns as possible. Suddenly fliers go from clearly the strongest, to necessary. What’s absurd is how fliers are affected by the Stride battalion in the same way all other units are. Stride is a battalion effect that allows a group of units to have higher movement for one turn, your little walking units suddenly being able to walk 12 squares like it’s nothing feels pretty good but this battalion can also boost the movement of fliers and horses which means: why would you waste it on infantry units? It would’ve been so easy, and would’ve made so much sense for stride to only work on walking units, or to at least have reduced effectiveness on mounted units, but they just completely forgot that.

I knew I should’ve gone wyvern, could’ve had way more 1′s

VII. Crests

Oh wow, a neat game feature where each character has a unique skill related to their bloodline, and the story acknowledges their existence by saying they’re so highly valued they decide who’s noble and who isn’t. Surely they came up with really interesting effects for all of them, right? Wrong. “Raise Mt when using skills”, “Raise Mt when using magic”, “Raise Mt when attacking”. This shit is boring. But hey it’s ok right, you can’t expect them to come up with unique interesting skills for each character to have right? Except they did, each character (crest-bearer or not) has a personal skill, and they are all way more interesting than crests. The only non-boring crests are the ones bore by Annete, Mercedes, Hilda and Ferdinand. And Annete doesn’t even learn meteor, so her magic-conservation isn’t even that amazing once she becomes a gremory, though it probably is fairly useful if she becomes a dark knight instead. I will say though, crests are still way better than the personal crit skills from radiant dawn, like Stun and the like which were basically glorified critical hits in some cases or straight up silencers in the case of luna or eclipse (hell, those skills got so bad that the endgame is filled with Nihil wielders, characters who just straight up cancel the activation of enemy skills because the game itself had to patch them out preemptively due to how ridiculous they were, but at least they were impressive and memorable and not just “raise Mt a little bit sometimes” are you kidding me).

VIII. Lost items

Up until now these have all been nitpicks but if anything gets my blood boiling is those dreaded lost items, a gameplay feature that I just straight up gave up on and never looked back. You find a billion lost items throughout the monastery, which is great, an item that shows the personality of the character that lost it, and once you return it to them your affection grows. The problem is that there’s really like a hundred of them, and they’re not hard to find but rather are a pain to give back to their owners, for the screen where you select them doesn’t allow for any kind of sorting options. How hard was it isys?? I press X and the items are ordered alphabetically, was that really so hard? You really expect me to rummage through this endless list until I find the right one from the sea of really small text for ants? THIS IS THE REAL GAMEBREAKER, THIS IS WHERE IT ALL FALLS APART AND I REALIZE THIS GAME IS A TOOL OF THE DEVIL TO WRECK HAVOC INTO THE SOULS OF ALL PLAYERS.

In the end

So yeah, basically it’s a pretty good game, I’d say at least a 9/10 and unironically among my favorite fire emblems. I won’t go into detail about what I like because that’s not the point of the post and really who gives a shit, but it’s really good and I can’t wait for the dlc next year! Also this:

(also please let magic always function like in this game where instead of tomes and staves you have a set number of uses per encounter like it’s dungeons and dragons, that shit ruled)

edit: I did another post about the maddening difficulty, you might like it if you have read this far 

[tdpholidayexchange]

Sweet Contraband

To @honeylemon2346 from @skyfireflight! They write: “ Hi! I hope you had a happy holiday season! You requested Gren with sweets as a motif, so I wrote a little story about Gren and Ezran bonding over jelly tarts. I hope you enjoy it!”

Takes place about 3 years before season 1

Gren didn’t visit the castle often. He and General Amaya were usually stationed at the Breach. It was a constant, 24/7 job for the most part, keeping the border safe from potential invaders. Being Amaya’s voice as she relayed orders to her soldiers, or spoke to anyone else, really. 

But times like these were nice. A reprieve from the thick clouds of smoke that blocked out the sun, and the constant heat that rose up from the river of lava below (and always being in armor certainly didn’t help). 

What did help was knowing that he was doing an important job – for his kingdom, Katolis, but also... for Amaya. Amaya’s presence, getting to help her and interact with her every day, made being at the border much more bearable, even enjoyable. And even though he’d only been her voice for a year, and she was the general...he could say that Amaya was becoming a friend. 

Still, it was nice to have some time off, away from the border. 

The eldest prince’s 12th birthday had been yesterday, and Amaya had taken leave to celebrate. Gren had been by her side most of the time at the castle, tagging along with her at Prince Callum’s birthday party, interpreting for Amaya when she spoke to attendees – councilmembers, townspeople, even some ambassadors from other kingdoms coming to wish Callum well – and stuffing his face with strawberries, shortcake, and jelly tarts between conversations. 

The party was over now, but Amaya wanted be with her brother-in-law and nephews a little while longer, so she and Gren were to stay a couple more days before returning to the Breach. 

Today, Amaya was in the castle with Callum; Gren would have followed, but Amaya had waved him away with a fond smile and told him to relax and have some time to himself. 

Now Gren found himself in the castle garden.  He stood near one of the trees there, enjoying the sight of the greenery. The summer breeze felt cool against his skin, and he basked in the feeling. Though the weather was still warm, the heat was nothing compared to that of the border. And he was without his armor for once. 

A creeaak came from somewhere beside him, and Gren turned to the source of the sound. A square grate that he hadn’t noticed before was lying face down on the ground. There was a stuttered scraping sound, and right after it, a tray piled high with jelly tarts slid from a hole in the wall and clattered on the ground, some of the jelly tarts toppling from the heap. Fluffy brown hair and its owner tumbled out, followed by a grumpy groan and a large, glowing frog. 

The owner of the fluffy brown hair was a little boy. Gren took a second to recognize who it was. He remembered the child flitting around the grand hall yesterday at the party, plate piled high with sweets, and small hands coming up from under tables to swipe from trays. And honestly, it was adorable – though he had worried the little boy would get a sugar rush and would be too hyper to go to sleep that night. 

The royal colors on his clothes and his resemblance to King Harrow made no question of who it was. 

The little boy was Prince Ezran. 

Gren watched as Ezran fitted the grate back into the hole in the wall, taking a few tries and grunts of effort before he succeeded. The prince then picked up the tray and stood, several more jelly tarts dropping to the ground with soft patters.

He turned, and caught Gren watching him. 

The boy froze, eyes going wide like a deer caught in the light of a night traveler’s lantern. Below him, the large glowing frog gulped down jelly tarts from the ground with a swipe of its tongue. Gren raised his eyebrows. 

Ezran blinked once. “Uh….” He braced the tray against his chest with one hand, and held a tart out to Gren with the other. “Jelly tart?”

Gren was pretty sure that the boy wasn’t supposed to have all those jelly tarts. Especially if how he was sneaking around and his reaction to being seen was any indication. And Ezran’s sheepish tone and smile further confirmed his suspicions. 

Still, none of those jelly tarts were making their way back to the baker’s, or wherever they came from, any time soon. They probably wouldn’t want them back anyway, having been taken through air ducts.

Well, it wouldn’t hurt. 

“Thank you. I would love a jelly tart.” Gren gave the youngest prince a small bow before taking the offered dessert. Ezran giggled. 

“I don’t think I’ve seen you around before,” Ezran said. He placed the tray on a nearby bench, even more jelly tarts falling off, and plopped down next to it. The glowing frog – glow toad, Gren’s mind finally supplied – hopped over and began eating jelly tarts off the ground. Ezran took a tart from the pile and started munching on it, his legs swings back and forth in the air. 

Gren went over and sat down beside him. “I’m Commander Gren. I work for your aunt Amaya; I’m her sign language interpreter.” He took a bite of the jelly tart. 

Mmmmm. An apple jelly tart. It was delicious. 

“Oh, yeah!” Ezran’s eyes lit up. “I remember you! You were at the party yesterday!”

“Mmhmm,” Gren replied through a mouthful of jelly tart. He finished and swallowed. “That’s right. And I seem to remember you swiping a lot of sweets from the tables.”

Ezran giggled around his next bite.

“These jelly tarts are really good,” Gren said. 

“Yeah, they’re the best!”

“Now,” Gren decided to solidify his suspicions, “I must know. Where did you get all these delicious jelly tarts?”

“From the baker’s.” Ezran’s tone was light and betrayed nothing as he took another tart from the stack.  

“Did the baker give you all these jelly tarts? He’s pretty generous.”

Ezran paused mid-chew. “Well….” He looked down at his swinging feet, not meeting Gren’s eyes. “He didn’t exactly give them to me.”

Gren just furrowed his brow and tilted his head in a show of confusion, encouraging Ezran to continue. 

“We sorta…well, Bait and I, we…,” his shoulders hunched sheepishly as he met Gren’s eyes, and he stopped swinging his feet, crossing his ankles and curling his legs inward, “kinda…just…took them…without permission?” He looked away, back down at his feet. “We stole them.”

Yep, suspicions confirmed. 

“I’m sure the baker wasn’t very happy.”

Ezran shook his head, sighing and sounding a bit ashamed of himself. “No, he wasn’t.”

“Tell you what,” Gren said, taking another of the sweet contraband. “Why don’t we make it up to him?”

Ezran’s gaze drifted back to Gren. “How?”

Gren looked around at the trees in the garden, many of them heavy with ripe apples. “Are we allowed to pick the apples?”

“Uh-huh!”

“We can take some apples to the baker and help him make more jelly tarts. I’m sure he’d like that. What do you say?”

“Yeah!” Ezran nodded eagerly. “I can get some baskets from the gardener.” The little boy hopped off the bench and ran out of the garden. Gren smiled and took a big bite of jelly tart. 

A few minutes later, Ezran returned with two big baskets. Gren stifled a chuckle; the baskets were almost as big as he was, too large for his small arms, and he leaned backwards as he struggled to carry them. 

“Here, let me help.” Gren got up from the bench and took one of the baskets. He made a show of hoisting it up and making it look heavier than it was. Ezran giggled.

“Let’s get apple picking!” he cheered. 

The two got to work. 

Despite Ezran’s strains and grunts of effort, the 7-year-old couldn’t reach the apples dangling from the tree branches. Gren smiled and lifted Ezran up onto his shoulders. 

With a “whoa!” and giggle from Ezran, then they really got to work. 

Gren carried Ezran on his shoulders as they went from tree to tree, one hand on the boy’s leg to keep him steady, and the other hand keeping the basket braced against his torso. Ezran did most of the picking, and Gren was able to shift his grip on the basket to reach a few of them. 

In the end, they had 1 and ½ baskets full of ripe red apples. 

They made their way to the bakery – through the streets this time, not the air ducts – Gren carrying the full basket and Ezran tottering with the half-full basket hugged to his chest. 

The baker was delighted. 

Barius, as Gren learned his name was, let the two of them mix the dough as he prepared the apples, Ezran sneaking in bites of dough, and both he and Bait swiping apple pieces. The baker didn’t scold, though the way Ezran paused right after he snatched an apple slice said the little boy was expecting him to; Barius simply smiled at him fondly and said, “Just make sure there’s enough to make the jelly tarts with.” And Gren himself snuck in a few bites, too. 

That was part of the fun, after all. 

By the time they were done, Gren and Ezran were covered in flour, bits of dough, apple jelly, and powdered sugar. With a laugh from both of them, Gren ruffled Ezran’s hair to get some of the powdered sugar out of it. Luckily, Barius had given them both aprons – though Ezran’s dwarfed him – and washing up in the sink was easy. 

And there were plenty of jelly tarts. More than plenty. Enough to make up many times over for the ones had Ezran stolen. 

Barius insisted they take home half. 

They carried back three baskets full – three baskets lined with white cloth and filled to the brim with the sweet apple jelly tarts. Ezran carried one, and Gren carried the other two, one in each arm. 

Gren also carried the gardener’s baskets – stacked together, upside down, on his head like a floppy winter hat made of woven pieces of wood. Some townspeople gave them a few looks. He gave the townspeople cheery greetings and warm smiles. 

When they got back, they seated themselves on the bench in the castle garden. A basket lay beside each of them, the third basket at their feet. Bait sat in between them. 

(The tray that Ezran had stolen was empty, and now lay beneath the bench; apparently Bait had cleared it while the two of them were picking apples. Gren made a mental note to make sure the tray got back to the baker.)

Ezran was munching away, his legs swinging happily. “These are the best jelly tarts ever!” he said through a mouthful of jelly tart, his voice muffled. 

Gren chuckled and grinned. “They are the best jelly tarts ever,” he agreed. He wasn’t sure what they were going to do with all of these pastries, though. The two of them – well, three of them – couldn’t eat them all at once. He figured the kitchen staff would know what to do with them. 

“We should do this…,” Ezran said with his voice still muffled, then he swallowed, “more often.”

The castle garden was peaceful, with the cool, fresh air, the greenery and colorful plants bathed in the late afternoon light, and the silence except for the prince munching, birds chirping, and the leaves rustling in the wind.

The silence was interrupted when Amaya and Prince Callum entered the garden, with a “Are you sharing?” from Callum, and a fond smile and a signed “Enjoying yourself, I see,” from Amaya as she surveyed the scene in front of her. 

 Gren nodded with a smile of his own. 

He basked in the peacefulness of his surroundings, the taste of sweet not-contraband on his tongue, and thought that this was a nice way for him to spend his leave. 

 And yes, Gren thought, he would have to visit the castle more often.

[togetherkru]

the 100 ask game            

tagged by @pendragaryen. Thank you again 😘 , I told you it would take some time ;-). But I did it !!

1. What station on the Ark would you be from?

Farm station... Or Alpha, maybe.

2. What would you get arrested for on the Ark?

Hum. Would I get arrested on the Ark ?

3. Would you take off your wristband when you landed on the ground?

No, probably not.

4. What would the necklace Finn would make for you look like? (Clarke: deer/Raven: a raven duh..)

A flower I think. Ok it’s a bit difficult, but that would do it for me.

5. If you could resurrect any MINOR character who would it be?

yeah, just like @pendragaryen Zoe Monroe. Her charachter had such a potential...A wasted potential.

6. Create a squad of 5 characters to go on missions with. Who are they?

Bellamy, Clarke, Monty, Octavia, Finn or Raven. It depends on the moment of the mission :D

7. What Grounder Clan would you belong to you?

Trishanakru.

8. What would your name be in Trigedasleng? (example: Octavia=Okteivia…just make it up!)

Um... Well it’s not very convincing, but something like Steifani (??) kom Trishanakru.

9. Thoughts on Finn? Some people hate him, and others love him, so I’m curious

Well I found the character interesting : someone who seems to be kind, and good, and sometimes he really was (In Murphy’s Law, when he arrives and protects Charlotte, I found him nice...). BUT, in the end, he was hypocrital and manipulative.

10. Be honest. How willing would you have been to take the chip without knowing all the horrible things it does?

I'm not sure I would have been so attracted to the chip. I'm pretty down to earth.

11. What character do you relate to most?

Clarke. I like her resilience and her selflessness.

12. What character do you like the least?

Jaha, for sure, even though I loved the actor and his performance. But I find the character of Jaha full of contradictions and cold.

13. Describe your delinquent outfit. (Would you wear something like Murphy’s jacket with the spikey red shoulder patch or have a trademark like Jasper’s goggles? Be creative, yet practical)

Something like Harper ? So a  leather jacket, jeans probably. And something in the hair.

14. Favorite type of mutant animal?

Phosphorescent butterflies ? Not original, I know.

15. What would your job be on the Ark?

I’m a teacher, and I really appreciated the scenes with Pike on the Ark. So a teacher, probably. A professor of earthly history, lol.

16. Would you have willingly pumped Ontari’s heart if Abby asked?

Nope. I would have fainted.

17. If Lexa wasn’t Heda, but she was still alive then who would have made the best commander?

I don’t really understand the question. It has to be a nightblood, right ? Do we know many ?

18. How would you act if you ate the hallucinogenic nuts like Jasper and Monty?

I’d probably be laughing a lot and I'd sound rather stupid.

19. How would you have dealt with Charlotte’s crime? A more John Murphy approach or Bellamy Blake approach?

Surely a Bellamy approach.

20. Who should have been the Chancellor, if anyone?

Kane definitely. He’s such a good character, who learns from his mistakes.

21. Would you have been on Pike’s side like Bellamy or on Kane’s side? Or Clarke in Polis?

I must admit I hope to be on Kane's side. But can we really know without being in a real equivalent situation? Can we really know what the “right” side is ?

22. Mount Weather had a lot of modern commodities. (example: Maya’s Ipod) What is the one thing you would snatch while there?

The Ipod. A way to listen to music. Cool.

23. What would your Grounder tattoos look like? Hairstyle? War paint?

tattoos that would look like plants. A vegetable motif. On the arms and the neck.

24. Favorite quote?

Harper’s sentence “everyone dies, Monty. Let’s show them how to live” moves me every-single-time. And I think Clarke (and Bellamy) need to learn how to live (not to “survive”), need to let go. That’s why, I think, it’s a very good summery of the show.

But I also like Kane’s statement: “It’s not to late to choose the right side” (see question 21).

25. If all of the characters were in the Hunger Games, who would have the best shot at winning?

I would go with Luna or Octavia here. That’s what we saw in the show.

26. Least favorite ship? Favorite canon ship? Favorite non canon ship? NOT INCLUDING CL OR BC OR BE

Least fave: I don’t really have one. I watch and enjoy the show.

Fave canon: Marper (sigh) and Linctavia (sigh).

Fave non-canon: Raven-Murphy.

27. A song that should be included in the next season? If there had to be another guest star like Shawn Mendes on the show, who would you want to make a cameo?

That’s really difficult. Wow.

But I fell in love with a video from @teamhodgins (<3), with the song Chariot (Jacob Lee). I don't think it fits the atmosphere of the show, but it fits Bellarke SO WELL. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OiZSIFXAf0E

28. What would you do if you were stuck in the bunker with Murphy for all that time?

With Murphy ??? I’d probably kill myself. Or kill him...

29. You’re an extra that gets killed off. How do you die?

Like Lincoln ? Sacrificing myself for others ? That would be cool.

Or I would probably have died of some kind of infection as a result of a poorly treated injury. Not a heroic death, then.

30. A character you’d like to learn more about and get flashbacks of?

Not a popular opinion, perhaps, but I want to know Echo better.

31. A character you’d bang?

Um. That IS a popular opinion... Bellamy of course. Or Clarke. Or both.

32. Would you stay in the Bunker? Go up to Space? Or live on your own in Eden?

Definitely Eden.

I’m afraid of Space, and the Bunker ??? Is that even a question ?

33. In the Bunker, would you follow Octavia? What would you do to pass the time underground?

Well I wouldn’t be in the Bunker (question 32).

34. What crime would you commit in the Bunker that lands you in the fighting pits?

Well I wouldn’t be in the Bunker (question 32).

35. Up in Space, who would you bond with first? Who would be the most difficult for you to get along with?

Aah. I would bond easily with Marper, and with Bellamy, Raven and probably Emori. It would be hard for me with Murphy. I think I could get along with Echo of Season 5..

36. How long do you think you would last on Earth by yourself?

Not long.

37. When the Eligius ship lands what do you do?

hide and observe. Like Clarke, but without the riffle. At least I hope so.

38. Favorite Eligius character? Least favorite?

Diyoza, because, you know, “I like her style”. Least fave: Vincent. So creepy.

39. Would you Spacewalk?

Noooo. Space is far too dangerous.

40. Would you prefer to eat Windshield Bugs, Space Algae, or Bunker Meat?

Space Algae. But as I said, I wouldn’t be in space. That’s why I wouln’t live long (question 36) LOL.

41. Would you start a war for the last spot of green on earth? What would your solution be to avoid it?

I’m a teacher, so I have to be diplomatic. I would negotiate for everyone, of course.

42. Would you rather dig out flesh-eating worms or stick thumb drives into bullet holes?

??? Maybe it’s a little less dangerous with stick thumb drives into bullet holes ? (I can’t even believe I wrote this)

43. Are you willing to poison your sister for the Traitor Who You Love? What would you do to stop Octavia?

For the Traitor Who I Love, yes, maybe. That’s hard... But I don’t think there was another solution at this point. I can’t even find something else to do...

44. Would you go to sleep in cryo or stay awake like Marper?

Good question. Even with the Love of my life... a lifetime, it’s very long. So probably cryo.

45. Who are you waking up first to explore the new planet?

Bellamy, Clarke, Raven, Abby. Diyoza too. I like it spicy.

That was fun. Long but fun 😄. I’m tagging (if they didn’t do it already, of course /or if they want to) : @geekyogicheese, @natassakar, @katersann , @emmyisgrey , @yourereallyhere, @bellarkespace , @historyandships , @lameblake and anyone who wants to !

[toddsfall]

Let’s talk about Star Wars

SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS (don’t say I didn’t warn you)

first off, the entire cast looked like a DELICIOUS SNACC PACK if you were attracted to any of them before and are wondering if they have somehow become more attractive the answer is yes. Yes they have. 

Rose is awesome, I love her (even though I have Thoughts about her storyline, more on that later) and if I see one more racist motherfucker on Twitter try to bend themselves over backwards trying to justify calling her ‘the worst character ever in SW’, ‘unattractive and fat’, ‘the worst part of the movie’ I am personally pulling the plug on the internet. Same goes for anyone trying to hate on Finn, y’all are really transparent and IT’S FUCKING GROSS. YOU RACIST ASSHOLES.

Hmm so anyway, I have a lot of thoughts and most of them will be rambly so come along this ride with me friends (I swear I’ll try to make clear & concise points)

Okay so I want to go right off the bat say that I have loved Star Wars since I was a wee babbie so I’m? going to? love it? always? so yeah, I know I’m biased (but honestly who isn’t? everyone reviewing the movie has their own biases attached to it sooo deal with it) 

The movie starts off with several action sequences which immediately pull us into the story, they got my heart racing from minute one and I was here for it. Also, I got goosebumps the minute I saw Leia/Carrie’s face and I stayed pretty emotional throughout the entirety of the movie. I think they gave her the respect she deserved, her legacy really shined through in every single one of her scenes (and her scenes were among the most memorable in the movie imo)

I loved how much the movie focused on characters. This was a story about people; 

how they can fuck up and fall off their pedestal (Luke); 

try their hardest and still fail someone (Leia and Han failed Ben, it’s sad but it’s true); 

how they can overcome their past and choose the light over and over (Rey was the main focus but Finn and Rose were definitely part of this theme as well); 

how they can feel completely abandoned and isolated and  become completely unhinged, unable to overcome their past and become completely bitter (Kylo Ren/Ben, listen I am not trying to sound like I approve of his actions but I really like how the movie delved into HOW people can become ‘the villain’ in a story, it was an unflinching take on how someone can have very legitimate reasons for becoming the way they am and it still in the end not justifying their actions at all. Idk, other people probably have a take different take on this but I for one found it kind of refreshing). 

This movie really delved into how heroes are people too, everyone fucks up. Everyone. Even the best among us. And we don’t all handle it so well (aka Luke completely abandoning everyone he’s ever loved to die, you could argue that was a pretty egocentric move and maybe that seems out of character - ask yourself if you’ll be the same person you’re now in 30 years now, especially if the current political climate keeps matching the pretty horrifying ones in sw- but it shows how disillusioned he’d become). 

However, in the end it felt to me like hope was still there. All these people, who have lost so much and who have fucked up in various ways (Finn wanting to abandon the rebellion, Poe leading them into a defeat, Leia failing her son, Rey possibly considering joining Kylo?/the darkness, Luke see above) still choose to stand up for what’s right. I know people thought the ending was a bit too cheesy (and I will come back to how choosing this ending will probably end up costing them later) but I loved it. I don’t know about you guys, but movies don’t always have to choose the dark route to end up good for me? Like, sometimes I just want to be entertained and escape into another world where it’s possible for heroes to be flawed but ultimately still good? maybe just me though.

So that’s what I loved most about the movie. Some of my fave scenes: (and I’m sure I’m forgetting some?)

I loved Kylo and Rey’s scenes (because heyyy they have similar experiences and yet are polar opposites, their dynamic has really grown on me! I don’t want them to end up together romantically but their climax will probably be the most interesting villain/hero confrontation in a while - that’s just my opinion thooo-) the scene in the rain, the hand touching and the fight in Snoke’s room were so emotionally charged I liveee

As I said, I loved Leia’s scenes (especially with Poe, god I wish we’d get more of that dynamic but :((( ) the scene with Luke at the end, not gonna lie that one got to me (I mean, it was going to be emotional bc of Carrie anyway but the weight of those last scenes, honest to god chills)

the scene where Admiral Holdo flies into the command ship was fucking MAGNIFICENT seriously, the silence? the visuals? fuck.

I want to go into a really detailed analysis of how the use of old motifs and themes from previous movies in the score carried a lot of the emotional weight forward, but I’d have to watch/listen to the movie again to fully carry that out with the respect it deserves so maybe another time. Just mentioning it because it��s still one of my favorite star wars things (and I know it’s said so many times before but you know what? the music is so good, it should still be mentioned in every single review. don’t do john williams dirty like this) it’s very subtle at times, but I swear I heard some of Darth Vader’s iconic march come through in Luke’s score in this movie? very interesting!! pls let me geek out over music internet I’m begging you

I already mentioned Snoke’s throne room but the moment you see Kylo deciding to kill him is glorious too (props to Adam Driver, seriously you can hate Kylo and I totally understand but attacking the actor - especially when it’s based on his looks, which most of you are wrong about jsyk I don’t make the rules, it’s just science his eyes look like a baby deer?? - is so unnecessary please don’t stoop to the level of those dudebros on twitter attacking rose? like, Kylo has enough bad deeds on his resumé it’s okay you can attack him for that, you don’t need to drag his looks into it so annyyywaay sorry for that tangent it just irks me)

BB8 being the reason while basically any of the resistance is still alive is so fucking funny I’m sorry if you hate it I love my dumb orange cat robot (the reunion with Poe? cleansed my entire soul)

Finn towering over Phasma and spitting out ‘rebel scum’ is Good and should not be forgotten also, speaking of good acting? the way John conveys the inner conflict Finn is going through so subtly is probably going to go unnoticed BUT IT IS GOOD AND I’M GOING TO SHOUT AT Y’ALL ABOUT HOW MUCH HE 5AND DAISY° HAVE GROWN TILL YOU GET IT THROUGH YOUR SKULLS

if we’re talking about Iconique scenes, the man licking the ground and saying ‘Salt’ was fucakfmlkdj so funny I can’t explain how fucking funny that was 

I’m not going to dwell too much on what I didn’t like because I believe there is such a thing as analyzing something to death and I don’t want to do that (besides, it’s really not hard to find criticism for this movie. People really out there comparing it to the Phantom Menace? Lies. Y’all really hate this movie huh? Too bad, I was thoroughly entertained and I loved it  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)

I feel like most of my problems with the movie could have been solved with some changes to the plot. The critiques I agree with are

 the pacing was weird (how long was Rey on that island? it didn’t seem to be that much longer than the entire plot and subplots of the rebels trying to escape the ship, but that was at most like 20 hours sooo) 

the plot was pretty straightforward: conflict-resolution, conflict-resolution, conflict-resolution. I would have liked to have seen this shaken up a bit. The movie could still have focused on characters with higher stakes, more unresolved issues, messier plots. It was a bit too neat. I saw most of the ‘twists’ coming (e.g. kylo killing snoke, boy they really layed it on thick there) except for: leia charging in and shooting poe (heyoo that’s cinema baby), luke actually still being on the island (and something else but I’m completely blanking rn!)

 I think that’s why people don’t like the ending, it’s too neatly wrapped up in a bow (ignoring the fact that there are like 10 rebels left now? that’s seems like uuuh a problem) And while I like it from an emotional resolution point of view, I think the the movie could have done with more tension at the end. More tension, to keep you on the edge of your seat, wanting to immediately see the next movie. that was its biggest flaw imo

and finally - fair warning: I’m conflicted about this- Rose and Finn’s plot. Hooo boy, okay. So, I wanna say that I love them as characters but.. I don’t really want them to get together? idk remove all forced romance from your plot, writers. It will really help unclutter your stories I swear. (that said, I wouldn’t mind them in a relationship as long as it’s not to create tension with rey? or like any love triangle at all. Please leave that garbage at the door). Aside from that, I know people think their plot was the worst of the movie and I don’t think that. However, I think they could have done more with it. Shown more conflict! let Finn be the spark (and he is!! fight me!!) but also conflicted about joining the rebellion. Let Rose be completely torn up about her sister and let her be bitter dammit! They could have used more obstacles, their plot seemed mostly resolved by a deus ex machina (aside from Finn fighting Phasma - who I’m kind of wishing he didn’t kill cause I can sense she has sooo much more in her, honestly Hux is 100 times more boring, you have gwendoline RIGHT THERE FUCKERS USE HER) I didn’t mind the exposition of the filthy rich people planet (YESSS EAT THE RICH STAR WARS PLS SHIT ON THEM AS MUCH AS YOU CAN) but it just lacked.. spark. I hope their plot turns out to be important for the next movie, otherwise it was sadly something that could have been much greater (and it’s really uncomfortable to introduce two main poc characters and then basically have them contribute nothing to the main plot, hmm okay star wars I’m watching you)

I can’t/don’t have the energy to address everyone’s issues, but mostly I don’t agree with people being mad about characters (I think it’s clear I like the direction they’ve taken with most of them), the humour is a bit disneyfied but I really didn’t mind (it’s clear as day some of those cutesy aliens were in there for the money, money, money but like.. it be like that sometimes), I honestly don’t care about Snoke so I wasn’t disappointed his backstory was not a part of this, Rey NOT being a part of the great history before her is important to me (can’t believe I didn’t mention it with my favorite scenes, really regretting that salt guy now) even if they try to backpedal on it later that moment was beautiful in the movie (my space daughter isn’t important in the grand scheme of things but she so iiiiiis!!). All in all, I really liked it. It’s not my favorite movie (not even my favorite star wars movie) but it was damn entertaining! Here’s to hoping that the next movie will be the opposite of this very tight, contained movie. Give me the intergalactic class revolution I deserve (seriously, I hope that’s what Rose and Finn’s adventure was planting? might be idle hope, and I’m trying to keep my expectations low but it would be pretty cool right?)