#bitches gender neutral

[ricketycr1cks]

Bitches be like “found family🥺” and this is the found family in question:

[annabanannabeth]

everypony is a critic until they see my swagless and pathetic rizz encapture bitches body and soul

[violentbisexuality]

trying to find my clean underwear this morning and i found NOT my underwear can bitches stop leaving things at my place

[muffinlance]

I was rereading fellow prisoner li and I had an idea

Canon divergence au where instead of anyone doing feminism at the north pole aang accidentally panics and says trans rights

Aka instead of giving them any time to regroup and plan, aang's mouth moves faster than his brain and when they say "girls learn healing boys learn combat" aang says "what about me?" and leans hard into the "avatar incarnation of all those who came before, polygender because I contain multitudes" thing. you can't sexism me I have all the sexes, they're ghosts who give me god powers when I'm stressed out

I am now deeply in love with "AU where Aang goes 'Avatar State, yip yip!' and turns into Yangchen every time Pakku tries to drag him away from the healing huts".

[yurislotusgarden]

Wearing their Clothes, Part 2

ʚїɞ Separately! Fyodor Dostoevsky, Nikolai Gogol, Sigma x Reader

ʚїɞ Keep in mind English is not my first language, so you may find mistakes!

ʚїɞ Part 1 for those who want to read it <3

ʚїɞ word count: 1164 (Fyodor - 329, Nikolai - 368, Sigma - 461)

ʚїɞ Tw's: None! Just pure fluff, pet names used, reader's gender is not specified in any way, probably ooc but I live for soft characters

Fyodor Dostoevsky

No matter what, you getting his ushanka won't be an accident or a surprise for this Man. He probably knew for quite a long that you wanted to try it on.

Probably would make sure that you won't get it for Some time just to tease you and see your reactions to failing. 

Once he decided he had enough torturing teasing you, he would leave the ushanka on a chair or the bed, in a way that it looks like he for once, doesn't have it in the bathroom with him (Yes the rat showers even if forced) and just left it there. 

So, you obviously had to take your chance and try it on.

////////////////////

"Myshka, what are you doing?"

He definitely came out faster than you anticipated. You spun around, looking like a deer caught in headlights. To say that you took off the ushanka at the speed of light would be an understatement. 

"Ehm... Nothing?" A raised eyebrow. 

"Nothing you say."

 "Yup! Absolutely nothing! Was just looking if my eyebrows are equal!" A dumb response? Very much. Did you care? Not in the slightest, not right now. 

"So my ushanka in your hand doesn't exist?" Fyodor started to walk up to you as he said that. 

You threw the ushanka onto the bed in a hurry. "I don't know what are you talking about Fedya" 

"Sure you don't" 

Fyodor picked up the ushanka from where it lies and put it gently onto your head, fixing the few strands of hair that fell on your face. Are you hallucinating or do you see a small smile on his face? 

"You look nice in it, Myshka" 

“Really?”

“Of course, I wouldn't lie to you after all.”

You looked better in the ushanka than the dark-haired Man first thought, to say the least. And if he told you that you can wear it whenever you want, then no one needs to know, yeah?

Nikolai Gogol 

The little shit /affectionate I swear 

He probably knows you wanna steal either his hat or his cape, but wouldn't give you an opportunity to steal it just to see your reactions. It's amusing and he wants to see your emotions what can I say? 

I feel like the first time wouldn't be an accident but planned by him. Casually kidnapping taking you out in winter or just a colder day without letting you get warm clothes first, resulting in shivering and being cold soon enough. 

"Cold?" Came with a teasing smile from the clown. He knew what he was doing and had the audacity to tease. You swear you will hit him with something once you're back home. 

"Shut up, Kolya. Why did you even bring me out here so suddenly?" Your confusion was as clear as a clean glass. 

"Why, to have Some fun! Time for a quiz, dove!" 

"Oh no" 

You swear Nikolai loves giving you quizzes that no one but the rat Fyodor could get or guess. You could bet with the dark-haired Man in question and win the bet.

////////////////////

"And you lost once again!" 

"I did" You chuckled. As much as you lose, they certainly never feel like ones. "So what happens now that I lost?" A good question as every time you lose, Nikolai manages to make the 'punishment' -his Words not yours- a different one. 

"This!" 

And before you realized it, you felt something heavy on your shoulders, but it also was warm. Looking at yourself, you see that Nikolai put his cloak over you, and fucking hell if you could you would just curl up in a ball and sleep, or even hibernate in this shit. The material inside is softer and warmer than you thought, no wonder he doesn't get cold.

"Your cloak?" 

"Didn't you want to try it on, dove?" 

"Is that why you brought me out in this weather in my pajamas?" 

"Of course! How else could've I given you the honor of wearing my cloak?" 

"..."

"Dove?"

"...Listen here you little shit-"

////////////////////

Next week he whined all around, whether at home or at work, all because of you not cooking his favorite cookies that you do every week.

Sigma

I had to think about what would you even steal from this Man but then I remembered this guy wears heels. 

You probably wouldn't need to think of it that much, it would probably be a random idea you got when noticing that he left them somewhere. I feel like he Has a big ass room in the Sky casino, an apartment more like, so getting the heels that would be left by the door wouldn't be hard at all.

////////////////////

You have to say, that even tho the heels don't fit perfectly on your feet, you are absolutely slaying the look. 

"I have to steal them more often goddamn" You mutter to yourself, looking in the mirror.

You continued to walk around a little, just for fun, the heels were more comfortable than you thought, and now your confusion about how does Sigma wears these every day and doesn't complain about feet hurting has been cleared up. 

"Name? Have you seen my heels?" Fuck. 

"No? Why?" From what you know he doesn't wear them after 10 pm (22), since people tend to not come to his office much after if anyone even does, so why is he searching for them at 11:30 pm (23:30)? It's almost midnight for fucks sake. 

"They need me down in the Main room, but I can't find them." 

"Maybe you left them somewhere else and don't remember?" 

"Maybe"

You thought you were safe when you heard him walking away… until you heard him walking directly to the bedroom where you were a few minutes later. 

'Shit-' You thought as you realized that and took if the heels, lightly throwing them under the bed so it looks like they were left there after being taken off by Sigma and kicked under by accident. 

You went back to standing in front of the mirror just as the Man Opened the door. 

"You sure you didn't see them?" 

"Yeah. Why?" 

"The heels are under the bed" Came the soft reply from Sigma, together with a finger pointed at the pair of shoes. 

You leaned down, making it look like you didn't know. 

"Oh, sorry love" To your pleasure a barely noticeable blush appeared on his cheeks due to the pet name. 

"Don't worry about it" A quiet response this time. Sigma Walked over to get the heels before putting them on. 

He stopped at the door before he walked out of the room and turned back to you. "I know you tried them on [name], just so you know." And casually Walked out. 

You want to jump from the window. Fuck. 

////////////////////

Sigma didn't mind, not at all. In fact, he bought you a matching pair of heels. It’s needless to say that this pair is one of your favorite shoes.

Notes, comments, reblogs and anything else is greatly appreciated <3

[ashersanity]

Screw @princesstokyomoon for fueling my brainrot on this. Whatever, I fucking need to say it.

content warning! dub-con, cheating, small age gap?

Nonstop thinking about typical delinquent that Whitney is with PC as their teacher. Fuck, would it be so goddamn chaotic. Especially since you catch the blonde’s eye right from the start as you walk into the classroom, class they never attend to but shit, maybe they just might if you’re the one teaching it. Sweet smile of yours, introducing yourself to the students and even giving Whitney the same treatment as the others! Poor thing that you are, don’t even know what you’re getting yourself into as the bully grins right back at you.

Never misses a class of yours after that, everyone murmuring about it too, how the all time troubler maker in town is now actually going to school. Yeah, well they shouldn’t be getting their hopes up since it’s just another reason to come and see you, maybe check your ass out a bit whenever you turn around to explain a subject on the blackboard. Doesn’t hide their clear interest in you either, openly leering at the way the collar of your shirt hangs low, leaning over the desk to help the ‘clueless’ bully who desperately needed your help on this particular question. Too bad, Whitney’s not listening, already thinking of ways to have you settled between their legs with their crotch shoved into your face, so fucking cute.

Makes everything weird and sexual between the two of you on purpose, ordering them to go and clean the windows of the classroom as punishment for their behaviour. (I don’t fucking know). Happily obliges too, getting up from their seat with a smirk on their face, everyone else gaping since Whitney is never one to take orders from other people, much less their own teachers.

There is absolutely no reason for the motherfucker to be stripping their shirt off while they do it, fabric bunched up in their grip, now all wet and soapy from the water bucket used. Hurrying yourself their way to at least get them a jacket and hide their exposed chest, the delinquent smiling to themselves from the visible blush on your face.

‘Course it doesn’t just stop to that, stepping into class one day just to find them receiving head from a student under the desk though really they wish it was you under there. Sends you a fucking porn link of a teacher and a student going at it against the wall, panting and gasping instead of the math homework you asked of them, claiming it was an accident. The harsh reprimanding that you give them after that doesn’t stop them, only fuels the bully’s heated pursuit, needing to rub one out at the bathroom once you’re over with your little speech.

Even if you do turn down all their attempts at you, they know you’ll eventually crack, know you’re actually lonely deep inside, that your home life isn’t as exciting as it once was. Just a glance at you shows it all, you haven’t had it for a while haven’t you? Whitney’s there to help you out despite your insistences for them to stop.

Willing to play the long game and it does pay off as they trail their hand up your thigh, upwards to your crotch and you not stopping them like all the other times. Immediately gets addicted to the sick thrill of this twisted relationship, hushed breaths in the classroom, telling Whitney to keep it down while you’re bent over the table or maybe they’re bent over yours, either way it doesn’t really matter. Hastily pressing quick kisses to your lips, rough hand down your shirt as they grind against your thigh. Adorable look on your face that you make whenever you think you’re about to get caught too, tensing up and grip tightening around the blonde’s waist. Fuck, they love it all.

If you have a spouse too? Whitney is so rubbing it in their face like the petty little shit that they are, makes it clear that you two are fucking. Firm arm wrapped your waist or clinging onto your own like a needy puppy that just won’t go away, leaning into your frame, blatantly pulling your collar down to reveal the hickeys and bite marks left behind. Introduces themselves as your ‘favorite student’, as if they even got the grades to back that statement up huh..

Well, those whines and whimpers that the bully elicits out of you every time you two fuck on the desk, grasping at their hair for purchase, moaning out Whitney’s name instead of your spouse who’s long gone in your mind.

At least they’re getting it from the fucking hot teacher in school.

[fixing-bad-posts]

I unfollowed then followed you again to show my support for the cock post

okay i have to admit that's funny bitch behaviour of you you have my blessing to stay

[loganlermanstanaccount]

only the baddest of bitches hate driving

[veronicathegoddess]

thinking about "oh you've been such a good bitch today haven't you puppy. i think you deserve a treat for being so good. oh look at you wagging that little tail for me. you're so excited huh. well come here puppy and open that mouth for your treat" before they unzip their pants and violently fuck my face until they cum

[thatdeadaquarius]

OKAY OKAY SAGAU BUT THE CREATOR IS A HUGE KPOP FAN LIKE IMAGINE THE MOST STOTIC CHARACTERS DANCING TO TWICE

ANON I HAVE SEEN UR ASK SITTIN IN MY MAILBOX AND BEEN WAITIN FOR THIS ONE-

GOD IM SO BASIC ANON I ONLY KNOW LIKE 2 SONGS BY TWICE (LIKE "FEELS" OR SMTH POPULAR), I KNOW A LITTLE MORE ITZY, BUT MY MAIN'S JUST BEEN BTS SINCE 2019😭

(send me recs pleassseeee ;-;)

Hey this'll be the last time I use colored words for characters!

I think it's a bit too distracting, and the only reason I was using them was to let ppl know if their fav was in there, but now I'll probably just use CW/TW to mention character heavy asks/fics :)

Thanks for being patient with me for so long if ur still reading my stuff :0 <3

Listen as you read?

EDIT 1/1/24: Hey I expanded more about this on my Eldritch Fanfic Part 2 post, but unfortunately I did a form of exoticism by including the term "Huangdi" inappropiately here. I have since replaced it with "Emperor" as was the original untranslated term I would've used. I'm genuinely sorry that I did this, and will absolutely be on the look out/do better in the future. I hope you can understand.

----

AGONIZED OVER THE GIFS THIS TIME THEYRE SO PRETTY AND I WANTED TO GET THEM DANCING ONE OF THEIR CUTER ERA/THEMES ALL DRESSED UP TOO-

also im so sorry?? Idky i was in such a scenario mood today??? Ig im in my exectutive dysfunction paralysis state so maybe that’s why, like it unconcoiusly wants me to waste more time not catching up on uni work??? anyway, hope u like this chaotic addon 😭

or i just love this ask sm, that’s entirely possible too <3

I JUST NEED YOU TO KNOW I PUT ON A MEGA TWICE PLAYIST WHILE WRITING THIS ENTIRE THING LMAO

ok but they’d totally heard ur music tastes thru the screen right?

like just imagine-

the video game music is normalized, and to them its just another one of those “all kinds of magic in teyvat” causing the music, like the seelies wandering around all the time or elemental energy

Jean is flipping through a folder filled with the reports for the week, she’s got to get the routes ready for the week, then there’s the liyue shipments the knights need to help escort over, then checking in on any of the emergency stations/rations throughout Mondstadt for weary or hurt travelers/merchants-

She sighs, and yet another irritated thought is thrown Varka’s way in her mind, she can’t even muster the energy to make it outright dislike she’s so tired…

Jean was so concentrated she just now is starting to hear the Favonious Headquarter’s music once more, it’s peppy upbeat tune… grates like nails on a chalkboard.

and if she has to hear that damn flute for the next hour she works, she’s going to start banging her head onto her desk.

♤

Out in Jueyun Karst, Xiao is dealing the finishing blow to a flying ruin hunter

He’s huffing and stabs his spear into the ground to lean on and catch his breath, the gentle music of the peaks begins to float around him once more

The Yaksha feels the earth beneath his feet shake. Not like from his Lord, not the other adepti angered, but an enemy so large it’s stomps shake the ground he stands on

Xiao quickly straightens less he fall over, pulling his spear out of the dirt with a little more effort than it probably should’ve taken…

The high sounds of the guzheng trickle through the air, a perfect representation of the base of the slopes, trees, streams, and nature all around him

Xiao turns to face the enemy behind him, his arm popping with tired joints,

…A ruin grader, two ruin hunters, and finally regular three ruin guards, follows it. they come around the corner of the bottom of another slope, and they're still simmering with black smoke, curling off their metallic shoulders.

Xiao sees several red targets layer over his chest,

the music fades a little, but sticks around, plucking strings gently. Xiao sighs, exhausted already.

♧

Kazuha and Beidou had to redirect the Alcor from a nasty storm at sea that intercepted their usual route between Inazuma and Liyue,

the storm had practically chased them further and further down form the Inazuman islands

it wasn’t until Kazuha, from the crow’s nest, spotted fog on the waters that they realized they’d be forced to go into said creepy fog, what with the crackling looming clouds at their backs pinning them in

“Not good Captain, the fog is miles long, I’m not sure I can see a way around it…” Kazuha calls down to the deck, Beidou letting out a sharp sigh through her nose

“Damn… fucker’s not even sentient and it practically backed us into a corner, feels like we literally gotta escape the damn thing… BRACE YOURSELVES CREW, WE’RE HEADING INTO THAT FOG!”

The Alcor makes it’s way into the fog, a piano swells with a strange tune…

Beidou, Kazuha, and the crew know to listen to the music of teyvat, especially if you have a life at sea, where storms can appear in the middle of the day or other pirates could attack any moment.

The music means nothing good, but at least Kazuha can see the storm staying at the border of the fog, moving no further in, unlike themselves

“Shit… see anything up there Kazu?” the Captain steering the ship doesn’t even reach a shout, for the music has creeped out all conversation on board

“No ma’am, wait,” a chill breeze brushes through the wanderer’s white hair, he feels goosebumps jump on his neck and spine,

“…Yes! Portside Captain, land, no enemy movement yet!”

“Alright, here goes a bad idea…” Beidou’s arms flex as she easily turns the heavy wooden wheel, steering left,

the Alcor gently comes ashore, and they make anchor.

…there are no enemies, like Kazuha said, but the tune worsens, it had gotten louder now that they’re actually on the theme’s land

It plays slowly, encasing the crew of the Alcor in a paranoid quiet, and it almost has a melancholy note

Crows caw and fly off of a stone gate up ahead, they can see flickers of a strange blue light further inland, like figures carrying lanterns everywhere they go…

“Damn music, I wouldn’t feel half this anxious if it didn’t sound like we were walking into a monster infested cave…” the first mate says, the first person to break the quiet the music held over them.

“Yes, while we might need to stay here for awhile, I think we’re all very aware how dangerous this is…” Kazuha agrees, crossing his arms and squinting at the moving blue lights… the piano plays on.

☆

You open on Spotify on your computer, clicking on your favorite kpop playlist, it’s been rainy all day, so you need the peppiness of this dance playlist to actually not be half-asleep playing Genshin-

You hum along to the Korean lyrics as you boot Genshin up, ugh, ur in-game music is so loud, u forgot u turned it up last time to hear the new Sumeru music…

Turning it down, you let the Kpop songs fill ur headphones as you nod to the beat, your team materializing on screen. Right, off to do commissions first!

♤

Jean is like.. seconds away letting out a scream of frustration, anger, tiredness, loneliness, etc. her hands clenching her hair and ruining her ponytail when, thank Creator, the theme quiets down finally.

The loss of her immediate ire gone, she lets go of her hair, her hands just kind of hovering midair, not knowing what to do with herself, all the negative emotions giving her face wrinkles just melt off, leaving her stunned, blank face behind

🎶 Dalkomhan chocolate ice-cream-cheoreom Nogabeorineun jigeum nae gibun so lovely! Kkamkkamhan uju sok gajang banjjagineun Jeo byeol jeo byeol geu yeope keun ne byeol 🎶

Acting Grand Master Jean actually screams when abruptly a song in an unrecognizable foreign language, blasts into her office, around it, filling the entire Favonius Headquarters with its… cheeriness??

Jean lets her hands fall onto the desk, still in shock

..well, she quickly decides she’s grateful for the new music either Barbatos or the All-Parent had heard her pleas for…

…actually, it’s kind of,, catchy?

Jean takes out her ponytail, massaging her aching scalp, huh, she really did have it tight she’s just now noticing, she feels a small smiles appear on her face,

she actually kind of wants to do something now (she kind of hopes this new foreign bard song sticks around..)

♧

If you asked Xiao what happened in that battle he’d be hard pressed to tell you,

without going completely red in the face. LMAO

He probably wouldn’t tell the other adepti this, especially Cloud Retainer, but Xiao had definitely had to get used to fighting brutal battles to the sound of gentle summer day-esque music

Right as the aruguably, army of ruin machines spotted the Yaksha, he’d launched himself into the air to try and evade the rusted beasts, aiming his jade spear, adding winds to swirl around the staff to better boost his attack, the machines warm up, their targets moved and locked onto him midair, right as both sides launch their attack-

🎶 Geogi neo I fancy you! Amuna wonhaji anha Hey, I love you (Love ya!) 🎶

Xiao nearly falls out of the air.

Quickly recovering, he uses his anemo power to propel himself off to the side dodging, he swears to his Lord and his Emperor himself, delayed attacks, as if the machines were caught off guard too,

missiles whiz by him, exploding behind, the peppy song of foreign women’s voices sings out into Jueyun Karst bright and happy-

🎶 Geurae neo I fancy you! Kkumcheoreom haengbokhaedo dwae 'Cause I need you! (What?) 🎶

Xiao’s face goes from being confused to concentrated throughout the rest of the battle, and the worst part… it actually helps his energy levels.

and he finds himself nodding along

☆

Kazuha takes the lead, his sword unsheathed and at the ready to cut down the slightest movement before it can get to any of the crew behind him,

He’s flanked by the Captain of the Alcor herself, Beidou’s electro shield emitting a deep hum as it blocks in front of both himself, and the crew behind him

all of the pirates have unsheather their own weapons, daggers, swords, claymores, bows, their all on high alert, waiting for.. well, any enemies at all.

In fact, Kazuha hopes he sees hilichurls soon, just for the familiarity it could give him and the his crew-

the music begins to fade away.

The crew stops just shy of the entryway that was perched with crows before they scattered, the white fog hasn’t moved beyond its lazy drifting, but the creeping sounds have stopped entirely. Not good.

Captain Beidou sighs after a few silent moments, other than the quiet breathing and shuffling of weapons from the Alcor crew.

She lets her claymore sword thunk against her shoulder, and just as she opens her mouth, turning to address the all, deciding camping here will have to do for the night-

🎶Fancy! youu, ooh Nuga meonjeo johahamyeon eottae Fancy! youu, ooh Jigeum neoegero gallae Fancy! ooh!🎶

Kazuha’s shoulder shoot up to his ears in a flinch, red eyes wide, he barely stops his reflexes from taking a hard swing with his sword, several crewmembers shriek, collide with metal clinks into one another, Beidou drops low, her sword swinging off her shoulder into almost a full swing at the ground-

…

…..

……..

🎶 Dalkomhan chocolate ice-cream-cheoreom Nogabeorineun jigeum nae gibun so lovely! Kkamkkamhan uju sok gajang banjjagineun Jeo byeol jeo byeol geu yeope keun ne byeol 🎶

the music plays on, the only one making any noise as the entire Alcor crew just, stop. after their initial shock.

Kazuha’s the first to break.

He desperately tries to contain a quiet chuckle, which turns into a giggle, which turns into a full-on wheeze, as he buries his sword into the ground to brace himself on it and one of his knees

the Captain cracks by the time Kazuha wheezes, her laughter going straight to guffaws and knee slapping, her claymore shaking the ground where she stabs it to lean against

the crew erupts into laughter, both as the peppy foreign song echoes into the mysterious fog, and Beidou’s ridiculous laugh, as always

they don’t recover until two songs later when there’s finally a slow kpop song, Kazuha’s had to sit down, tears streaming down his face, Beidou’s half-dead, wheezing out complaints about her stomach, as the crew keep sending each other into more and more laughter right as they think they’re done.

They decide their Akitsu Mikami must have the best sense of humor and must just be sitting on their celestial throne pranking some of their subjects from time to time, and the Alcor crew find themselves all the more appreciative for it, their nerves entirely gone about the island

Kazuha and Beidou are constantly asking other bards they meet to try and see if anyone can recreate the song for the crew sometime they liked the beat and the memory so much, Fancy by Twice will still get a laugh out of Beidou and Kazuha, and they’d quickly let you in on the inside joke so you’d be a part of it too (afterall you did it lol)

♡

NOW MORE IMPORTANTLY, BC IDK IVE BEEN ON A SCENARIO KICK LATELY?? SORRY IDK WHY U GUYS KEEP GETTING SCENARIOS-

There’s only TWO 2 CATEGORIES THAT MATTER HERE-

◇

Who’s DANCING!! w/o u needing to do anything but play the music:

NILOU (she got those choreos done in like, an hour flat everytime u teach her, shes always begging for “just one more dance lesson Greatest Lord? 🥺”),

YUNJIN (difference betweeen the two dancers is that nilou asks :) → yunjin lowkey demands, she like always gets u into a situation where you have plenty of time to teach her and feel obligated, u just got gaslight gatekeep girlbossed into teaching her another kpop dance LMAO), they also see it as they’re (literally) god-given job to dance better than any idol you’ve seen do it before, esp when they recruit groups of other dancers to join for group choreos

Yoimiya! cutie #1, CHILDE, amber, eula, ITTO, bennett,

Collei (but shes shy u gotta encourage her),

Diona (cutie #2),

FISCHL (would form an actual group to dance all the choreos like a real kpop group),

Gorou (shy #2, needs encouragement),

Kazuha (tbh I think he’d have fun and be weirdly good at it, fem or masc dances),

Ayaka (shy #3, needs encouragement and would rather die than dance in front of ppl other than you),

KLEE CUTIE #3, NAHIDA CUTIE #4,

Qiqi (but u gotta teach her slow bc she needs to memorize it, and also it takes her a bit to write down the dance steps in her journal so she doesn’t forget as much),

Razor (another person i think would just have fun with it! also he’d do it but it would be very, aggressive? like making finger hearts but violently shoving his arm out at ur face lmao),

HEIZOU (shutup he’d actually be good at it and brag- and flirt at you-),

Aether (shy #4), VENTI, xingqiu, xinyan, KAVEH

BARBARA (she literally stalks u around Mondstadt all like “oh hello your highness! just happened to walk by you and was wondering if you heard any new of those “kpop” dances, you know I’d LOVE to show it off at my next show-!” like she hasnt been a block behind you the entire day 💀)

♡

WHO YOU MANAGED TO CONVINCE TO DANCE LMAO-

babygirl Wanderer (he literally surveyed the area before he finally let u teach him any moves, and refused to any sort of dramatic moves, like fem or masc),

Alhaitham (but only like a small part of a guy group choreo like a bit from God’s Menu or smth, he was too lazy to do anymore even for u lol),

Cyno (dammit some of these bitches look way too good doing even girl group dances-),

Diluc (u got him to do like, a pose. LMAO and he saw Kaeya in the distance and quit immediately LMFAO),

Kaeya (but it didnt take much convincing, if anything it just took forever to teach him, he’s talented in footwork for swordfighting but apparantly not dancing, at least not modern dances he tripped so much ur convinced he did it on purpose at one point so he’d fall into your arms again lol),

Ganyu (super shy, wont do it around anyone but you, and maybe Shenhe),

speaking of Shenhe (she just took awhile to teach bc she wanted to stay upright a lot, kinda stiff),

Keqing (once again, another who’d only dance when it’s just u two lol),

Yae Miko (she just wanted to learn the whole choreo that’s what took so long… and now she’s making comments like “My goodness, my god wants me to dance for them? They’ll even show me how? Oh, now I must do it perfectly so I can satisfy you, my Kami.” STOP TAKING THINGS OUT OF CONTEXT UR TEACHING EVERYONE-),

Ayato (he’s acts so theater gay he refuses to do anything but the girl group dances/fem dances lol),

SARA (easy, give her ur strongest, saddest pout and she cracked like glass, u got her to do a whole dance with u/she actually got into it too, its her secret guilty pleasure now lol),

Kuki (did one sort of move then got BARRELED OVER by Itto’s crazied boy group acrobatics he likes so much, u know the backflips over each other type of ones? yeah. ),

Ei (the god herself/not the puppet, catch her never doing that lol, she tried but didnt, get it? she’s also pretty stiff, but she looks like she’s having fun so u just keep teaching her moves, and she likes that its you teaching her something new),

Thoma (shy #5 ? idek what number we’re on anymore lol),

TIGHNARI (u nag that bitch so hard he nearly throws a drink at you to get u to stop bothering him- NO he does NOT think those dances would suit his ears- dammit he wont do that dance, no matter how much he likes you- DAMMIT MY LORD-),

Xiao (if u thought nagging Tighnari was hard, this is like nightmare mode, not only does he not wanna do the dances, but he also wants to understand WHY u want him to dance each and every move- !! bc he would “look cute or cool”?!?!!?!!! …yeah he’s gone, he went so red u cant even get him back with tofu),

Zhongli (would like, be so confused on how to make his body do that, that he ended up just sort of posing, at least he looks cool)

♡

(anyone not on these 2, u did, in fact, not manage to convince, yes, even if their god asked them to, nor are they doing it of their own volition lol)

WHAT THE HELLLLLLL-

THIS IS SO LONGGG IM SO SORRRYYYYY

ANYWAY HOPE SOMEBODY LIKED THIS, DW ILL STOP THE WEIRD SCENARIOS AFTER THIS ASK I JUST GOT IN A PHASE I DONT KNOW WHY

also, im like, three weeks away form graduating uni? NICE, soon i will be free to assault u all with responses mwhahahaha (rubs my little gremlin hands together)

Safe travels,

💀 ♒

♡the beloveds♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk

[hysteriablues]

||Midnight Kisses||

Muzan x gn!human reader

Muzan and his secret lover meet up at night again after quiet sometime. Pure fluff ahead, ooc Muzan

It was night time, the moon stood tall in the sky as no clouds could be seen. The stars shone brightly in the dark night sky, it was a peaceful and quiet night. A silhouette could be made out under the moonlight, a person. They were dressed in black clothing. A concerned look could be made out on their face as they started pacing around the three. It was already past midnight, where was he? The person they were so impatiently waiting for seemed to be late, which was extremely unusual. A sigh was let out as they took out a box of cigarettes from their pocket, trying to calm their nerves by filling their lungs with that familiar smoke again.

"I told you before this is bad for you didn't I?"

The figure came to and halt at that voice, a noticable smile made it's way onto their face as they turned to greet the male who was standing not too far from them.

"Muzan, and there you had me getting worried over you."

Now the both of them had smiles adoring their faces as Muzan stepped closer to the human. The demon king wrapped his arms around the other's waist and pulled them closer, taking the box of cigarettes out of their hands.

"Apologies my dear, I've got held up with.. let's say a situation that suddenly came up."

The handsome man explained as he buried his face into their lovers neck, inhaling their all too familiar scent. A giggle was heard as the demon felt a hand run through his hair, he relaxed at the touch having been stressed about the situation that occured sometime ago.

"Don't worry about it love, I'm glad you're okay. I've seen a lot more demon slayers around lately and couldn't help but be worried."

They sighed out continuing to run their fingers through their boyfriend's hair as it also had an calming effect to them. Muzan sighed out and placed a kiss onto his lovers neck. They had to be more careful then, he wouldn't want them getting hurt because of him in any way. If that where to happen he wouldn't ever forgive himself for it. Muzan wished nothing more than to just take them with him to the infinity fortress, but he knew better than that. Especially with some of the uppermoons being as unhinged as they are, his mind lingering on uppermoon two. He shook those thoughts out of his head as he leaned back again to look his partner into the face. They smiled right at him, and his stress practically melted away.

"Then we might have to start meeting up at a different location then, I wouldn't want those slayers interrupting my time with you in any way. I already got the uppermoons for that."

Shaking their head they placed a hand on Muzan's cheek and caressed it gently, noticing the way how this whole situation seemed to have stressed the man. They placed a quick peck onto the demons lips and watched as a warm smile made it's way onto their boyfriend's lips again. The man simply looked beautiful, his black hair that contrasted his pale skin so well and the way his pretty red eyes practically glowed in the dark. Everything about him was breath taking. It was nearly impossible to believe that someone like him, had chosen someone like them to be by his side. None on the less they were extremely grateful for that as Muzan had always treated them well no matter what. They would never wish for anyone else than him, that much was clear. A comfortable silence was shared between the two as they looked at each other with each a fond smile on their face.

"You look pretty today, like always."

A grin made it's way onto their face when they catched the look of surprise on their lovers face. Seems like the man had not expected the sudden compliment as he blinked a few times before he grumbled a bit under his breath. Laughter made it's way out if their mouth seeing the demon's reaction. A glare was thrown their way.

"I'm sorry that was so- you're so cute. I couldn't help myself but laugh at your expression!"

They tried to defend themself all while trying not to laugh in the middle of their words again. Muzan could never be mad at them. Their laughter made his heart jump as he hadn't heard it in quiet a while. The demon king let out a chuckle of his own, amused and happy to see his lover enjoying themself like that all because of his blatant surprise. An idea struck his head as he started moving his hands that were placed on the others waist up by a few inches. A confused look was send his way before that look suddenly turned into a panicked one.

"Too late darling, this is my revenge."

And with that he started tickling them. He watched as they squirmed like crazy trying to escape his grasp while laughing the whole time. They were begging for him to stop in between their fits of laughter. He grinned and continued tickling them, only stopping when he felt satisfied having heard them laugh for long enough. Muzan watched his lover catch their breath again as they were leaning on him for support.

"That was such a foul move mister, booo. I can't believe you did this to me!"

They exclaimed pretending to be hurt by the others action which earned them a quiet chuckle. The demon started mockingly cooing at them patting his lovers head and caressing their cheek.

"Oh you poor thing, want me to kiss it better hm?"

His lover crossed their arms before their chest pouting seeming to think about the offer. They looked Muzan up and down, as if trying to decide if Muzan was worth forgiving. A small grin made it's way across their face as their eyes stayed on the other's lips just a second more than the rest of his body. That was more than enough a clear yes. Muzan took a step forward, trapping them between his own body and the tree. His hands met his lovers waist once again as he leaned closer. The moment his lips made contact with theirs he closed his eyes, wanting to enjoy the moment. Both of their lips moved in sync against each other. Arms were wrapped around Muzans neck the next second pulling him in deeper. The two lovers broke apart for a second before connecting their lips again. That cycle got repeated a few more times leaving the human gasping for air at some point. Of course Muzan quickly noticed that and they broke apart once more. Placing their foreheads against each other's they gazed into the others eyes. A smile made it's way onto their face again upon seeing the way those pretty red eyes glowed in the dark.

"You know, we should do this more often."

The demon king couldn't stop the grin that made it's way across his face at his lovers comment. He nodded in agreement before being pulled in for another kiss from them. If not for the sun that was going to rise again soon, they could have kept going at this forever but sadly good things end too. Their hand caressed Muzan's face one last time for the night as the two bid each other goodbye. They would meet up again, in a few weeks this time. Until then they had to wait patiently just daydreaming about his kisses once more. But they didn't mind, a long as he always came back to them.

[strigital]

Freezing my ass off working at outdoor shopping in minus 5°C got me thinking about how Johnny would one hundred percent pissed, peeved and disgruntled if V ever got in a situation where they're cold and there's no way to warm up. Maybe they're stuck in the desert at night and their car is out of choo so they can't turn on the heating. Maybe it's pouring autumn rain and they just happen to have forgotten their jacket (maybe even Johnny's jacket?) at home. Maybe they were forced to take a dip in the bay and are now wet and shivering. Whatever the reason, he'd be so pissed there's nothing he can do to help. No jacket to take off his back and give to V, no ability to sit shoulder-to-shoulder sharing body heat or even to run off quickly and get a cup of hot coffee for them. He's just forced to sit there, endure their numb fingers, blue lips and shivering insides. All he can do is call them stupid for forgetting to check the weather, grab a jacket or something. Deep down, of course, he's worried sick. He knows they'll end up with a sore throat and a runny nose tomorrow. Maybe even a fever. And they can't afford this shit right now! Another sickness is not what their dying body needs! So he grumbles, whines and bitches throughout the ordeal. Then asks them - not tells them, but he gently asks - to please go see Vik and take a minute to warm up and relax. Not because he's also forced to endure the physical pain discomfort of cold, but because Johnny might be the person to worry most about V - genuinely, feverishly, like he never worried even about himself.

[subterra-rose]

Ppl calling Belos an incel are so real but also remember this man COULD’VE got bitches bc most of the Boiling Isles liked him prior to the DoU, he’s just a huge miserable cunt

[fanficsforheartandsoul]

German!Reader: First impression

Captain Price: So, Y/N, what's your first impression of the team?

Reader, part of KorTac: They're really nice, I love them!

Price: That's great!

[10 minutes later]

König: Wie war's?

Reader: Mein erster Eindruck als ich sie zum ersten mal gesehen habe; hochnäsige Zicken.

[benevolenterrancy]

I am both so sorry and so delighted to have given you OHSHC/TGCF brain worms it’s literally the best thing ever though!!!

It is seriously haunting me at the moment, I can't stop finding the premise absolutely hilarious... here, have some Three Tumours

au notes:

Ling Wen doesn't like wearing dresses and uses the boys' uniform instead. For this reason she's often mistaken for a boy which drives her nuts. She's been accused of doing this for clout or preferential treatment.

Ling Wen is the president of the Computer Sciences Club and manages the school's monstrous group chat server. It is hell. She secretly can't wait to graduate because everyone else refuses to learn how to run it and she knows it'll go down in the flames the second she's out the door

Pei Ming is a certified Jock™ and tries to convince his friends to join him on a sports team -- any sports team! -- every year. Hasn't happened yet but he's persistent

(Pei Ming eventually learns that Xie Lian is a Secret Jock and begins a dedicated campaign to pilfer him from the Host Club; Hua Cheng is Not Fucking Amused)

Shi Wudu is easily the richest student in this school of rich kids and is not above throwing his wealth around to get what he wants. This earns him the less than affection nickname of "Tyrant"

He Xuan applied for this school and got through its entrance exams specifically to ruin Shi Wudu's life. No one knows this (or why he's so set on it) except Hua Cheng who thinks it's hilarious

There's a sign outside the compsci club door that says "Palace of Ling Wen". No matter how often she takes this down, one of her compsci minions will put up another of increasingly elaborate design (everyone at this school has money to burn and time to kill)

[truegoist]

this is the only time ever I’m writing abt him. fuck this shit why is he on my mind

anyways gn reader whos implied to be taller than him

you lean towards the door frame, a smirk on your face as you watch the sae itoshi struggle

“You sure you okay there itoshi? Don’t need help?” You call out to him, the redhead standing right front of a laundry machine

“I’m managing just fine. Fuck off” Sae hisses back at you right away, picking a bottle from the shelf to pour on top of the clothes.

“Really? Cause you’re holding bleach right now”

“oh”

You approach him, taking the bottle away and putting it back on the shelf(as far away from him as possible), resting your chin on top of his head as you proceed so.

You can feel sae tense up under you as you continue with his laundry, his breathing quick

“And that’s all, hope you’ve learned something itoshi” With that you spin around to leave, stopping when you feel a tug on your collar.

Turning around, you see sae itoshi staring up at you, almost missing the red on his cheeks.

key word, almost

“There’s still the blacks, dumbass”