#but i don't remember seeing any specific content for it until after i got into the game

[papytonpropaganda]

genuinely papyton has been part of my life for so long now that I can't remember when exactly I started liking it. it was either early 2017 or sometime mid to late 2016. I know I started doing fanfic planning for it in like, April 2017 (just before the first chapter of Walls was posted) but I genuinely can't remember when I first saw it and thought "oh what a silly ship, ig I could get behind this."

incredible that it's literally just daily life for me now and yet I can't remember at all when it started or what caused it.

[mcytblr-archive]

Early MCYTblr Interviews: georgesoot

today's interviewee is georgesoot/dreamwasfound, who, in his words, "emerged from the senior living center to tell all". under the readmore is a transcript if the questions and answers.

Q: What was, in broad terms, your experience in MCYTblr? Are there any experiences/events that stand out to you?

A: Well it was primarily an outlet to channel all my obnoxious thoughts about Minecraft at the time. I had started watching Minecraft videos during the Pandemic, and came across [they who shall not be mentioned] and noticed there wasn't really a community on Tumblr yet. I just knew that someone had to show up and make it gay. It was easy to slot myself in, start making posts that I will never understand how I thought they would be funny, and slowly built up some sort of a following due to my sense of humor but also due to my ability to soberly ~critique~ the Minecraft Men as content creators, micro-celebrities, and as people. I never really fell into niches or was much aware of what other people were doing, until I was kind of folded into this idea of Dream Lying. I don't mean to sound self obsessed but I didn't really care about anything beyond my immediate sphere of friends?

For instance, you mention with other interviewees the Elections. I did not pay attention to those for a single second. I do remember we were saying "stop the count!" because we thought Georgeeehd should have won. And I dubbed Wormweeb the Prime Minister of Mcytblr, but I don't even remember who was running? Or why this even happened?

But as for other events, if they were funny or I could wring something out of them, I do remember them. For example, the mass migration of Kpoppies to Tumblr after it was suddenly "legal" to ship content creators. That compltely shifted the "culture" if it can be called that. I remember all the fake stan accounts, but I never attempted to interact with them. Obviously I remember the Tapeworm post, all the Discourse, the Controversies, how I was able to get hundreds of notes by summarizing events of the DreamSMP, my great shame in life.

But yes, most of the time, I was not there to take things too seriously.

Q: More specifically, what was your experience being in Dream Lying/early critblr? Do you think your experience differed from “main” MCYTblr?

A: As for my experience in what has been dubbed Critblr, well I've been credited with helping to start that whole movement. I think it's funny, because truly the kind of reaction to [censored]'s warcry scandal just wouldn't play out today the way it did back then. But I think it's a function of being an adult, that I could look at [censored] not as an idol, like at all whatsoever. It's easy to swept up in the emotions of things. But as a veteran of Discourseblr, and multiple fandoms, I could see through [censored]'s lack of media training and awareness of the average center left teenage perspective on these issues like it was wet tissue paper. People were mad at for that, but I didn't care what people thought of me.

Maybe by coincidence the other members of Dream Lying also had similar worldviews to mine. Everyone could look past the stanning of it all and recognize when something "canceallable" occurred and discuss it frankly and succinctly. Well I couldn't discuss it succinctly but others could. So to answer your question, yes it was a different experience from the rest of the "community." And it got to the point that it wasn't just "holding creators to account" it became fun. It was fun being the buzzkill in an ironic sense, and also fun in an unhinged way to just create these ludicrous scenarios of [censored] the Young Republican cornering you in the hallway and asking you so how does gay sex work actually though? And again, shipping was a component of this too.

And we turned out to be right. At the risk of sounding arrogant, this will become a theme.

Q: In previous interviews with DLying members, we’ve discussed that misinformation/in-jokes were a big part of the culture, one of them being that Dream sued you for libel. Do you remember any others? Did you expect so many people to believe you?

A: As I mentioned, I didn't take things too seriously. I enjoyed doing a little light trolling, such as when I infiltrated a [censored] stan tumblr server and showed everyone his dogs, and then reveled in the drama of them acting like I killed their families. People also turned on me because I abandoned The Ship for a ship that comprises of two… perpetrators of sexual misconduct as of March 2024, though that would also be true of the Popular Ship as well.

Anyway my personal computer died sometime in early 2021, so I, as is per the usual for my personality, made it into a joke because it really was quite stressful. I mentioned to Reese Georgeeehd and Ozzie ohge0rge (sp?) that [censored] must've sent a virus to kill my harddrive. This evolved into [censored]'s legal team sending me a cease and desist letter, as I'm sure I was being extra ~critical~ on Tumblr at the time.

They asked if they could make that The Official Narrative. I cautioned against it, it leaked anyway, because their "Private Twitters" had hundreds of followers, and this enabled this joke to become a full fledged rumor. And then my "ops" as the kids call them, got wind of this too. Most didn't believe it, but some had this "If it did happen GOOD!" attitude.

But some other examples… let me think. We did try to heavily imply that Ranboo was a former member of our organization. We rarely outright lied about the creators, but we did usually distort or exaggerate things when it came to us, for comedic effect. Frequently someone will say to me "Oh so and so mentioned you again," and my go-to answer is always "Tell them I got hit by a bus," or "Tell them I'm withering away from my dementia in the nursing home."

I did not expect people to believe me, because I did not spread the rumor because I had completely disappeared from the "public" by that point. I purposefully devised a very unrealistic joke in the first place, so I really don't know who would believe that. Especially since I was known to be friends and enemies with doxxers, who could find that information out if it existed.

Like the thought of [censored] being so hurt by a single anonymous loser calling him a Trump supporter and a bad voice actor and someone who was going to hold his British friend captive in his basement and force him to go on a keto diet to the point that he starves to death, or that he had offshore bank accounts to evade Taxes, or that he paid his brother to be his body double (this turned out to be true), that he was pretending to be bisexual for clout, that he had 100% cheated on his speedrun (also turned out to be true), that he had enslaved his mother as his maid, that he and his other friend from Texas would engage in a little frottage as bros do… well the list is endless. But the thought of him being so offended that he gets his lawyer, whom he pays, to send me a cease and desist letter… well it's one of the few things I came up with that was actually funny.

Uh but no, anyone with a healthy attachment to reality would never believe that.

Q: I understand that you were also in EBblr and its surrounding communities. What was that like? 

A: I was never in ebblr… all I did was watch a few Tubbo streams, realize that he was probably gay, and I was right. Because what do you expect at this point?

I pointed out publicly that Tubbo and Ranboo were engaging in some light queerbait, except that they were obviously both queer. The point was I thought they (or at least Tubbo) were trying to engineer a New [censored], because that gets you attention which gets you money… like Kaceytron was right about everything? In these spaces, being Queer is a commodity. But I'm letting the point get away from me.

In private, I mostly reacted with bemusement, and we did have some genuine enderbabies, as I called them (mostly derisively), in our server, who took it all so literally and that it was so kawaii desu. I thought it was cringe. Like, Tubbo pretending to be coy and saying Ranboo's foot was bigger than his forearm. That took me RIGHT back to my days as a cringy 19yo baby gay trying to flirt. Oh I'm getting embarrassed thinking about it. But there were a few moments that Tubbo and Ranboo manufactured together that I thought were pretty cute and wholesome.

On the whole, I'm still confused as to why I'm included in this sub-community. I approached Enderbees as a marketing thing, or something of the sort. I never read fics, I never looked at art, I never really cared. I especially didn't care about their "characters" on the SMP, which also set me apart from the genuine unironic shippers. Some thought this was worse than shipping because I was committing that dreaded cardinal sin: speculating on CC's sexualities.

And yes, I popularized the word Truthing in this context. I explicitly modeled it after 9/11 Truthers, because the JOKE (hi remember none of this was meant to be too serious) was that we were deranged conspiracists who were probably best kept away from normal society.

Q: Is it odd to be regarded as infamous within the MCYTblr niche? 

A: No it's not odd, I at least partially strove for infamy. Any attention gratifies the ego after all, not just postitive attention. Then there was the absurdity of it all. Here I was, in the Pandemic, having multiple degrees, looking for jobs, getting a job, going to work, paying taxes, and theater kids in high school were probably drawing devil horns on my pfp and throwing knives at it. All because I said everything I said about [censored], or "speculated" that Technoblade was gay because he had drama kid energy, or called Tommy annoying that one time in 2020, or babied [censored] too much. There's really no end to the list of nonsense I was spewing.

And I'd argue that I'm not infamous. Gayminecraftmen had to tell me about your blog and your interviews. I'm doing this because my friends think it would be funny. And the Drama of Georgesoot emerging from the senior living center to tell all is the kind of stupid humor I like. But aside from this, I haven't thought about Minecraft in a while. I have to be spoonfed lore about these annoying content creators who don't even make content anymore. Anything I learn about the "community" now is against my will.

At the time, maybe I was infamous, but now? I don't care. To even dignify my "infamy" would be to admit that Minecraft Youtube is even relevant anymore. How pathetic! I just filed my taxes and got an oil change last week. Me and the homies are having Dune watch parties and writing elaborate screenplays for Timothee Chalamet to star in in our heads (shout out to Ciara). To reminisce on my Tumblr infamy for a community of mostly teenagers about Content Creators who made content for said teenagers and later preyed on those teenagers… is so opposite from the adult problems and adult interest I have. Not to be condescending but that's just how it is!

Q: What are some common creator criticisms that you remember from 2020-2021? Do you still stand by them?

A: The common criticisms have held up in my opinion. [censored] and [censored] were queerbaiting. [censored] was cultivating an audience of loyal vulnerable teenagers and he took advantage. So did [censored]. And [censored] who literally bites people? Oh… okay then.

Dream Lying was right about [censored]'s friend whom he invited into his home and whom he tried to gift a career, only to be outed as an abuser. We were right about [censored] coming from not just a conservative background, but a bigoted one, one that he refused to actually grapple with. We were right about MCC being rigged. We were right about the cheating scandal. We were right about so many things.

The only thing I was definitely wrong about was the [censored] really did hop off the plane at LAX with a dream and a cardigan. I thought he for sure would just put off the [censored] team hype house meetup forever. My psychic powers don't always work I guess. That wasn't a criticism though, just my coping. Oh and I was wrong that Ranboo was an industry plant, but I was right that he's annoying and has no talent. And Dream Lying said from day one that Tubbo and Ranboo's little relationship would not last the summer and we were right! In fact during that whole thing I also speculated that Tommy would start queerbaiting and then he did! I felt like Cassandra at times.

Anyway back to the point. I mean the criticisms of [censored] were just all encompassing, and basically stemmed from the fact that he was like all these video game boys- a white man from a republican household who was not properly media trained because Streaming is not a real industry career and none of them were prepared for fame. And that has borne out over and over again. They all have shady pasts, they all abuse their fame and take advantage of fans. So I do stand by these criticisms.

Q: Is there anything else you’d like to speak on or have archived?

A: Not really, I've already said far too much, so apologies to whoever edits these, I hope you enjoy the novel I wrote for you. I don't know, I have dementia, none of this is real. Karlarmy forever. Also who even knows if I'm the real Georgesoot.

[ofallthingsnasty]

So capture kill got me thinking, you know how in very, very rare cases a woman can have twins with two different fathers if they have sex close enough together and the planets are in alignment and all that stuff (okay I’m not a doctor I can’t remember the specifics but it can happen!)

Imagine poor reader getting knocked up with twins, one from Bill and one from Evan 👀

😊💕💕 aaah thank you so much for showing interest in capture kill!! you don't know how happy this makes me 💞 also dshjdhsja anon you are funny af, i can't stop giggling over here

fic referenced

Surpisingly, I think Bill wouldn't mind that much. For him, the rules of his pack go above all else. His alpha told him that whoever knocks you up gets to keep you - and now you're having a kid from them both? Well, whatever. He'll learn to live with it. His scent on you and you getting visibly pregnant is enough to distract him from that pesky sting of jealousy - and let's not forget, as Evan's elder, he always gets to call dibs. There will definitely be a learning curve for him but he'll manage. He won't hide his distaste for Evan but he won't be cruel to the other child. He is very protective, yes, but not all too territorial. As long as your kids with him outnumber any potential pups between you and Evan, he'll be quite content. He'll keep calling Evan a cuck until his dying breath, though.

Evan, however, is devastated. He feels betrayed by some divine force, feels as though he's been cheated out of a happy life. Having to share you with Bill is worse than not getting you at all - he could have split from the pack and moved away if Bill had gotten you, could have forgotten about this after many, many tears and grief. He can't even be happy that you're expecting your first child with him - it's all overshadowed by the fact that you're also pregnant with Bill's pup. He'll fall into a huge depressive episode, will grow apathetic and lethargic. Keeping his distance, you probably won't see him for weeks at a time, much to the delight of Bill, who uses the opportunity to play house with you and shit-talk the younger man behind his back. Not only did all of his most intimate, deepest dreams die a painful death, he'll have it rubbed into his face for decades to come. He may be a lovesick, delusional little creep but even he has to admit defeat in this situation. It truly shatters his whole world.

His behavior will get so bad that Hugh, their alpha, will have to step in and talk some sense into him - and into Bill. Evan is about to become a father - he needs to get his act together and step up and Bill will need to learn to control his acid tongue. Their little squabble is not only damaging to the little about-to-be family you three form, it's also creating tension within the pack. Evan will slowly get better and will start to regain some of his delusional, beyond optimistic tendencies (especially when he holds your child for the first time - he'll just start bawling his eyes out with happiness) but the relationship between him and Bill will require lifelong work. In the end (and if kept in check regularly), they'll get along somehow. Not without some fights, not without some troubles but they'll make it work. Be prepared to be pregnant for as long you are able to, though - these two will lay their claims on you again and again, each in their own way.

[prismuffin]

[Okay so homie ignore this if ur busy I just NEED 47 content and ur one of the only ones to provide it a req I guess????? LOVE U HOMIE 💞💞💞💞💞💞-

Anyway:]

PICK YOUR POISON:

Romantic:

So 47 with a genderfluid reader (Bc I KNOW u simp for this man and u are absolutely unhinged when it comes to your fav characters 😤)? Maybe a romantic candlelit dinner and it's basically really fluffy??? Imagine this it's been 2 years since he's taken you into captivity he's been nothing but kind to you and you find yourself catching stockholm syndrome. Maybe they share a sweet little kiss?

Or or or

Platonic:

Dad!47 with an agender reader? Maybe reader tries to escape or just in general rebels against dear old dad? I just wanna see how you'd write reader running away and 47 reacting to reader escaping from his tightly secured home- 😈

(Also remember that if u pick one I'll put the one u didn't pick in a new req once they're open again and I'll add another option to pick from)

A/n: Ahh yes, hello Ghost YOU DID NOT HAVE TO EXPOSE ME ABT SIMPING FOR 47 OK?!- But Ik you like a dad!47 so I went with that one

Escapade

Yandere!Father!Agent 47 x gn!reader

( summary: after asking to go to a party leads to an argument with your father, 47, you decide to rebel for one night and leave anyway )

Warnings?: Mentions of drinking, Yandere 47 so, possessiveness, stalking/being followed, mentions of an argument, 47 cornering the reader, mentions of guns, mentions of poisons and poisoning, normal Hitman violence- reader can be a teen or adult you choose!!

!-!more under the cut!-!

“No.”

“What?”

“I said no.”

“Why not?!”

47’s deadpan expression didn’t waver as he took a sip of his tea, the warmth of the liquid was evident to you even from where you stood. “Because I said so.” You almost audibly laughed at that, currently you were attempting asking your father to let you leave the house to go to a party that you had been invited to by one of the only people your father lets you talk to. He’s let you out of the house before so you don’t get why he won’t let you go this time. "That's not even an answer." "I don't want you going, drop it." You closed your mouth, swallowing any further protests as you did. "Fine," quickly, you stormed off to your room, making sure to not slam the door.

You huffed as you stuffed a bag with some extra clothing. You carefully picked out which garments you threw in there, you'd change later. You picked up a hunters knife from your desk and hid it in your boot. You’ve been with your dad for long enough to know that sneaking out was possible but not plausible. After he notices your absence, you practically have a specific amount of time before he locates you and drags you back home.

You’ve only attempted this once before way back when you’d first been taken. You were a child then and were able to escape using the vents that led through to the outside. You were only gone for what felt like a matter of seconds in your kid brain, though in reality you know if was longer. It took you a while to accept your “new life” as 47 put it. He was your father and though you know he took you from your real parents at this point there’s not much you can do about it now. You can’t remember what your old life used to be like so you don’t feel as bad when thinking about it. Instead, you’re glad that your father cares so much and even after earning his trust enough for you to go out semi-often his protective nature can still get overbearing at times. You’ve totally spotted him trailing you when you’re out with the only people that 47 let’s you talk to. Sometimes you wonder if they’re just actors he’s hired to make you stop whining about not meeting new people.

You scoffed at the thought as you zipped up your bag, you had a few rations of food and some water bottles in case you got thirsty, you were to wait until your father goes to bed and then you’d act, he sleeps around the same time every night when he’s not taking mission and it’s usually a pretty early time so there should be no problem with getting to the party late. All you had to do now was wait.

—TS—

The house was cold and dark, the shiny tiles reflected the light from the full moon that shone through the large windows. You'd be foolish to go through the front door knowing the system your dad has set up this whole house would come down on top of you if you were to trigger any alarms. Your heart raced and you steadied your breathing as you walked barefoot through the halls. Your father had an armory within the house that had a crawlspace designed for quick escapes. The heavy disguised door let out an even colder draft as you opened it. Flicking on your flashlight you pointed it into the dark room, stepping in and shutting the weighted door behind you as quietly as you could. You swear you could see your breath as you creeped through the cold armory, elevating your heels to feel less of the cold on your feet.

You quickly placed the flashlight in your mouth as you crouched down near the wall. Pulling a lockpick from your pocket, you undid the lock of the crawlspace as quick as you could, the cold of the room stiffening your movements slightly. After getting it open you crawled in, throwing your backpack further ahead first so that you could properly close the door to the makeshift tunnel. The space led you to a small room near the garage, the only way out other than the place you just came from was a large vent that sat in the corner. With a bit of struggle you were able to get high enough to unscrew it and crawl through.

You had done it, you'd made it outside, and though you knew you'd left an obvious trail of where you'd gotten out it was fine to you. Avoiding the cameras, you found your bike near the trail in front of your house and grabbed it. It was now that you put on your shoes, hoping that you hadn't left any obvious trails up until this point. You rode through the forests, breaking off from the main trail near the beginning to a less taken hikers trail that was blocked off halfway down the mountain.

Eventually you'd made your way to the main streets, riding all the way until you hit a gas station. It was there that you freshened up in their bathroom, changing your clothes into a more appealing outfit for the party. You then continued your ride to the address your friend had given you, your smile growing as you heard music as you continued to near the place. But no matter how happy you currently were your father was quite the opposite.

Looking at the cameras, his signature expression changed ever so slightly as he frowned. You'd escaped his watchfulness, honestly he hadn't expected you to get so far. By the time he awoke you were already outside, the crawlspace he guessed, and upon inspection he was right. He was quick to check his cameras, he had them aligned with the main trail to get to the house and at first he was able to locate you, but you'd obviously gone off path because the next second you weren't in frame anymore. He sighed, rolling up the sleeves of his black turtle neck. He stood, going to grab everything he thinks he'll need. Guns, knives, and syringes of multiple poisons littered the walls and counters of his basement. Explosives? He doesn't think it'll get that serious.

Sedative? Perfect.

He packs his coins and garrote wire along and sets off to track you.

"I'm so glad you could make it Y/n!" You friend yells over the loud music and you cheer back. "Me too! It took a while to convince my dad but I made it!" You lied, clinking your drink with them before chugging it back. "Oh shit-" Your friend stumbled and you snorted, almost choking on your drink as you laughed. "Ughhh here, take my drink," you said, handing your cup to your friend, "I gotta piss." "Let me go with youuu," they slurred and you shook your head. "I'll be right back it's right over...there!" You saidd, pointing dramatically towards the open bathroom door. "Plus I need someone to watch my drink." they sighed before waving you off, mumbling a fine as you skipped your way to the bathroom.

"Woops, sorry!" Your friend said after someone bumped into them. The person hadn't responded though and quickly got lost in the crowd of people. Checking that none of your drink spilled on them, your friend sighed at the lack of liquid on their clothing. Lifting the cup to their lips they paused, before laughing at themselves. "That's- That is not my drink~," they giggled at themselves before pushing your cup away from them.

Sooner rather than later you came back to your friend, swooping your drink out of their hand you took a sip as they immediately went back to talking to you. After a while though the lights started to blur together, it felt different from the previous effects of the slightly alcoholic beverages you'd been drinking and you struggled to keep your eyes open.

"Hey I'm gonna go get some air-" You tried to yell over the music but you're not sure how loud you'd actually been speaking. Stumbling out of the party you were met with the fresh cold night air, a stark contrast to the humid environment inside. You walked a little ways away from the intimate couples that littered around the front of the house. You blinked slowly as you caught your breath, you felt a little better but not by much.

A clinking noise caught your attention, in between the houses where the fence clashed with the opposite houses, creating a dark alleyway. Curious, you walked towards it, well, more like stumbled as your feet seemed to work against you. As you neared the location of the sound you were met with something shiny, a quarter. You picked it up, inspecting it a bit. "Nice," you slurred, putting the shiny metal into your pocket before standing back up. You stumbled backwards into a sturdy surface, a wall maybe? That you swear wasn't there before.

Turning, you came face to face with the bright blue eyes of your father. A gasp escaped you as you tried to back away, tripping over your own feet causing you to fall to the hard ground. You groaned as your father crouched down to you. "You never should have disobeyed me." Your vision blurred a bit more as you attempted to defend yourself. "What's wrong? Feeling a bit tired?" His voice warped in your ears as you fought the urge to keep your eyes open. "Let's get you home dear," Your eyes finally shut as your father grabbed ahold of your now limp body.

Waking up in your bed, you groaned as the slight hangover caused a pounding pain in your head. You moved to get up only to feel a slight tug on your limbs, halting your movements.

"Huh? Wh-"

Your eyes scanned your form, noticing that all of your limbs were handcuffed to the posts of your bed. "It's a precaution." Your head snapped to the side, where your father was sitting in a chair near the door. His expression, unhappy. You gulped, the false hope that you'd be able to sneak out of your house without getting caught felt so foolish now as his intense gaze practically swallowed you whole. When you'd be unchained, you weren't sure, maybe days or weeks even. But you do know that it'd be better for you if you just do as instructed from here on out. For your fathers punishments were never for the faint of heart.

———

Thanks for reading! Have a great day/night!!

My requests are OPEN so feel free to request anything! Just make sure you check out my SLOTS & Request Info first!

See my DIRECTORY for upcoming fics!

Masterlist

[threadsun]

Hello Dearie~!

So I was hoping to ask for the crew reacting to their MC's having to be in the hospital, cause they were attacked, have an illness, or something!

The guys could find their MC and bring them to the hospital or getting told their already in there! Was hoping to see what you'd write for their reactions and what they would do!

If that's not to much to ask? If not it's ok too. Please and Thank You

Oh I'm a huge sucker for this sorta thing!! I wrote a lil bit for everyone, but I'll gladly do a full thing for any of them if anyone wants~

I took many creative liberties because I had some super specific ideas when I read this ask >:3c

Content: Injuries, sickness, hospitals, amnesia, mentions of stalking, fake relationship, Nick's is a lil fucked up ngl, mugging, stabbing

Jack:

He was there when it happened.

One moment, you'd been wobbling on the little stepladder, trying to grab some of the spare cups from the backroom of the yogurt shop. The next moment, you were on the floor, the back of your head bleeding where it had hit the counter.

He'd never felt more hopeless than he did in the intervening hour, unable to do anything but watch your boss call for an ambulance, follow the EMTs as they brought you to the hospital, pace with worry while the doctors tried to stop the bleeding and made sure there was no lasting damage.

Even when you woke up, he had to stay out of the way and watch doctors swarm you with questions and tests until they decided you needed rest. You couldn't even acknowledge his presence until you were left alone in the hospital room.

"Jack," your voice is tired, but warm. You're happy to see him. He's relieved.

"Hey, Sunspot." He moves to sit on the edge of the little hospital bed, more leaning against it than anything. He takes your hand and strokes the back of it. "You took a pretty bad fall there. I was worried."

"I've told Barry that ladder needs replacing, it's an OSHA violation." You're trying to lighten the mood, but Jack only frowns.

"Are you sure you want to keep working there, Sunspot? It's a dangerous place. I don't want anything to happen to you."

He's been trying to convince you to quit for a while, to work from home somehow. But... now he's got even more reason to want you home. He can't do this again. He can't handle the uncertainty and helplessness of seeing you injured.

"Jack..."

"Rest, Sunspot." He strokes your hair, leaning down to kiss your forehead. "We can talk about it more later. For now, we need to get you better!"

As you close your eyes and let yourself drift to sleep, Jack turns his thoughts to Barry. Someone has to pay for his Sunshine's injury.

Ian:

Ian hadn't been sure what sort of welcome he should expect. Would you get mad at him? Welcome him home? Ignore him completely? His name was still on the lease, he had every right to be there. And... it was all part of his plan!

But... what he hadn't expected, what wasn't part of his plan, was to open the door and find you collapsed in the living room. You were grey, shivering, eyes distant. Scattered around you were tissues, empty mugs, piles of pillows and blankets, and a bucket of... he didn't want to know what, but he could guess.

You were sick. Sicker than he'd ever seen you before. All thoughts, all plans, all everything went out the window as he picked you up and carried you to his car. You needed a doctor. Immediately.

When you wake up, everything's bright. White and clean and beeping. Your sluggish brain takes a little bit to process that you're in a hospital bed. You can't remember much at all. Not how you got here, not why you feel like you're dying of consumption... even your own name takes a solid thirty seconds to come to mind after you focus on it.

There's a familiar person sitting next to the bed, holding your hand and looking like he's been crying. Ian. The name comes easier than your own had.

"Hey, you." You smile at him, eyes drifting closed whenever your focus slips for even a moment.

"Hey! Hey, uh..." He sounds nervous. Excited. Agitated. "Hey."

"I think you said that already," your laugh is more of a raspy wheeze.

"I'm just..." He looks almost like he's waiting for you to snatch your hand away, to kick him out of the room. You can't remember why you might want to do that. "I'm just glad you're okay."

It seems like he wants to say more, but the doctor comes in to check on you.

"You're lucky your boyfriend got you here in time," the doctor is trying to make conversation while he checks you over. "You were in a real bad way. If he hadn't been so quick, you might not have made it."

Boyfriend... Ian... The words circle in your mind as the doctor marks your vitals on the chart and checks on your IV. The more the pieces start to fit together in your brain, the more nervous Ian looks.

He just wants you to stop thinking about it. To just... let it be. For tonight. So he can hold your hand and be sure you're alright before you inevitably kick him to the curb in the morning.

Shaun:

Honestly, you probably should've expected it to end like this. Nothing good has ever come from a dare. In this case, you'd been dared to climb a very old tree in the park. You and Shaun were hanging out there with friends, and one of them had dared you to do it. Shaun had laughed and tried to persuade you not to, but you were determined not to look like a coward.

And then you climbed too high. And then a branch snapped. And then you learned what it sounds like to break your leg.

"Okay, fuck, alright, okay." Shaun shoos everyone back to give you space, picking you up and carrying you to his car. "You'll be fine. You'll be okay."

"Shaun..." Your teeth are gritted, eyes pricking with tears. Your voice is a little hiccupping sob. "It hurts."

"I know." He tries to keep his voice level as he rests you in the backseat with your leg propped up. He kisses your forehead before getting into the driver's seat and heading straight for the hospital. "Just hang in there, we'll get you sorted out. It'll be fine, I promise, it'll be fine."

The waiting room is busy. Apparently a broken leg isn't high on the ER priority list. Which... when you see some of the other people around you, it's hard to argue with. But it means that you're stuck in the waiting room, leg propped up in Shaun's lap, wincing every time it moves.

"Sorry." Shaun's voice is quiet as he rubs your good leg soothingly.

"It's not your fault," you're still speaking through gritted teeth, but you're sort of adjusting to the pain. "I'm the idiot who climbed the—fuck this hurts." Well, mostly adjusting.

"I know," Shaun ignores the outburst, but continues his soothing pets. "But I should've stopped you."

You give a little sharp laugh, it's all you can muster. "Like you could've stopped me. Oh, that's me!"

There's a nurse waving the two of you into the examination room, and Shaun lifts you into his arms to carry you in. Your words bring a soft smile to his face.

"Yeah," his voice is quiet, affectionate. "No one can stop you."

Nick:

He's been rehearsing his story since he found you. He's your fiancé. You live together. That's why he had the key to your place. He wasn't sure how you'd fallen and hit your head—all the best lies have some truth in them—but he'd heard the sound from your shared bedroom and come running. He's your fiancé. You live together. He's your fiancé.

The ring he'd swapped onto his ring finger really sold it. None of the doctors or nurses questioned his story. They let him sit nearby as they scanned your head, looking for injuries. They let him wait in your room while they waited for you to wake up. And then they delivered him the best news imaginable.

Amnesia. They weren't sure how much you'd forget, how long it would last. But they were fairly certain your memory suffered from the fall.

So when you awoke with a strange man holding your hand, a ring on his finger, and no memories of the last... well, it feels like years are gone from your brain. When he smiled softly at you and said your name in the most loving voice. When he told you he was your fiancé and the doctors called him the same. Well, why would you question them?

"Shouldn't you go home?" It's late, you think. The voice overhead had said visiting hours were ending. And you're pretty sure there's a home for him to go to.

"And leave you here alone?" Nick presses a soft kiss to the back of your hand. "Never."

He's so... sweet. So romantic. He looks at you like you're the best thing that's ever happened to him. It makes you feel giddy.

"So, can you tell me more about us?" The more you've talked, the less shy you've been about asking him to help fill in your memories. "Like how we met?"

"Well," Nick's voice takes on that soothing story-telling tone. "It all started a few years ago..."

He weaves you tales of your relationship. Invents first dates and anniversaries, moving in and a proposal. He fills your head with all the pretty things he wishes were true. And now... now they can be. All thanks to your little tumble.

And hey, he'd practically saved your life! How could anyone say that what he did was wrong?

Joseph:

He should've been there. He should've been with you. Maybe things would've gone differently. Maybe he would've been able to protect you. Maybe he could've taken the knife for you. Maybe...

His stomach turns at memory seared into his brain. Your body laying in the parking lot outside the studio. The contents of your bag scattered around you, save for your wallet. And the... he can't think about it. He can't not think about it. The gash in your side, gushing blood as he ran towards you.

He'd gotten you to the hospital in time. If he hadn't, he wouldn't be sitting in the waiting room, leg bouncing and mind racing, as he waits for you to be well enough for him to visit.

It was his fault. If he hadn't stayed in the studio so late, if he hadn't taken his time getting out of costume, if he'd just been in the parking lot at the right time...

He's been in knife fights before, he has the scars to show for it. He could've taken on the mugger. He could've protected you. Why hadn't he been there to protect you? Why had he let you get hurt?

His spiral is only broken when the doctor tells him that you're alright enough to visit. He spends a moment pacing in front of the door, wondering if you'll blame him like he blames himself. But... he has to see you. Has to see that you're okay.

"Joseph." The relief in your voice is tangible, and it relaxes him almost immediately. "They told me what happened. Thank you."

It feels good and bad and weird. Being thanked for doing the bare minimum. Being thanked despite failing to protect you. Being thanked by you.

He can't speak. He can't do anything but sit numbly in the chair by your bed and cry. Somehow, despite you being the one who was stabbed, the one with stitches in your side, the one who surely needs the comfort... Somehow, it's you comforting him.

He's haunted by the memory of your injury. He's haunted by the thought of your blood on his hands. He's haunted by his own failure to protect you. And he'll do anything to make up for it.

Jean:

He noticed your absence immediately.

His attention is always on you. So when he showed up on set and you weren't there? He noticed. And he didn't just notice. He stormed around the studio, demanding to be told where you were.

An angry Jean is a scary Jean. No one wanted to tell him what had happened, just in case the fury burning in his eyes turned on them. But someone had to, eventually.

In hospital. An accident. It was all he needed to hear before he was back in his car, breaking the speed limit many times over to get to you as soon as possible.

If he weren't quite so well known, he might have been removed from the hospital entirely, for how frantically he burst in and demanded to see you. But as it was, he was recognised, and no one wanted to argue with such a big star.

So, here he is, in your room, waiting for you to wake up. He's pacing back and forth, unable to get out all the excess energy and stress he's holding. He can't even look at you, laying there like that. Just the sight of the hospital bed makes bile rise in his throat.

His name is barely a croak, falling from your dry, cracked lips when you see him. He's by your side in an instant, holding your hand and offering you the cup of water on the table next to you.

He's asking you too many questions, not letting you get a single answer out. He wants to know what happened, how it happened, who's to blame. But most of all, he wants to know that you're okay.

Your hand squeezes his, weak but there. "I'm alright. I promise."

The tension seeps from him. You're okay. You'll be okay. He can relax.

[fallenclan]

"Moosefall! Come here!"

A voice from a gentle molly could be heard next to the nursery, the soft air from the evening emphasizing it. Moosefall turned his head around, startled to know if everything was alright with Salmonskip's kitting.

Silverbelly looked at the white tom hopefully from the entrance, a bright shining covering her eldery eyes as a soft smile formed her face. In a matter of seconds, the dark cat dissapeared, wanting the tom to enter the nursery by himself.

It wasn't as if Moosefall was really that cautious to disturb anyone in there, heck, he as any other cat in FallenClan WAS born there and grew up in the den's warmth until apprentice-hood took over their own age. This time however, was different; it was the first time he would go to see his new children! Maybe he would offer something for the tortie molly to recover faster, or perhaps play with the kittens once they're a few moons old (not for now, that is), or maybe request Maplestar to become a mentor of one of them, or-

'Alright.' - Moosefall thought, turning next to the nursery to enter it. 'Don't freak out yet, you haven't seen them for now. Besides, your mate wants you to spend some time with them at least.'

------

In the warmth inside of the nursery, a blue tortie cat, Salmonskip, could be seen. She has been planning this exact moment ever since she announced it to her mate. And now, there it was, all these long moons that looked like years for him to have them.

"Is a litter of two mollies and one tom!" Silverbelly announced, looking at the three kittens. They meowed constantly, with the exception of a certain ginger kitten, who instead stayed quiet. It didn't mattered, Salmonskip giggled at looking one of them kicking the two other littermates; they were blind for now, is not like they would see after all.

Moosefall ran through the leaves and looked at the kittens. Both Salmon and Moose's hearts felt like they were about to melt. Next to Salmon, Silverbelly went out from the den, understanding that the both cats would love to take some time before the queen could actually recover from the kitting.

"They're so..."

"Beautiful? I bet you would say that" Salmonskip giggled, he enjoyed making fun of the bi-coloroured cat lightly. Moosefall laughed as well, he enjoyed those jokes after all.

"Have you thought of a name for them yet?" Moosefall asked, raising his voice slightly in case if any of the kittens' meowings would be loud.

"Hm... I thought of two names" The tortie cat looked the brown kitten at first, who was struggling to snuggle up to her. "I think I will call her as Brackenkit"

He then looked at a ginger one, the same one who was quiet enough compared to the others. "I may call him as Foxkit, his fur reminds me of one."

However, for a specific molly-kit, Salmonskip didn't had anything for her. She was the most "aggressive" for her being newborn; going up to her siblings just to go to the molly's belly. Salmon's smile faded as worry invaded her, she didn't had any name ideas! He was supossed to think of one last moon!

Thankfully, Moosefall noticed his mate's worry, and as if a kittenhood memory approached him out all the sudden, he got an idea.

Something that had to do with an event it happened, back when he was just a kit, and has been in his head ever since...

He looked at Salmonskip, then down to the white and red newborn...

Then, after a few moments of thinking, eyerolls, and more thinking... he had the perfect name for her...

"Maybe... we can call her as Shrewkit, if that's okay?"

------

Aaaaa first time doing a Fallenfic and is about Moosefall viewing Salmonskip's kits!!!! Because I LOVE MooseSal/SalmonMoose and I crave for content of them.

Also, I enjoy the idea of Moosefall naming Shrekit as that because of his deceased sibling, who didn't made it to apprenticehood. I can't remember if her name WAS actually shrewkit though(? (I have terrible memory lol) but I think is very bittersweet :')

Also english isn't my first language so uhhh if there's any grammar errors is because of that lmao

- ☎️

AUGH my heart,,, Moose naming his kid after his dead sister is so sad but yall keep making it sadder somehow :')

[blackkatmagic]

Hi, Kat! I saw your post earlier about the New Mandalorians, and wondered if you have the time or energy to expand on that at all? If not, or you don't feel like it, feel free to ignore this. I've been interested in writing a fic where Mandalorians play a major role, but have been avoiding it given how much contention there is around so much of it, and just how challenging it is to keep straight what's Disney canon, Legends, and fanon. I'm also mostly not a comics reader, so I know I'm missing a big chunk of info there. So any chance you could point me to where to look for some of this information? Like, Death Watch being deported to an "overcrowded and undersupplied" moon. Is that extrapolation from what we see of Concordia in TCW, or are there additional sources that get into more detail? I'm also curious where we see Death Watch/warrior Mandalorians being POC? Jango is, of course, but I've heard other people claim that, other than Jango and the KOTOR materials set several thousand years in the past, we don't really see onscreen Mando POC until Rebels, after TCW creators got backlash for making all the New Mandalorians and Death Watch white Vikings. Are there other sources that show the exiled warrior Mandos being POC? Any help you can give me figuring this out would be greatly appreciated! I know fanworks can go in whatever directions their creators want to, but I want to at least make sure I'm working from a clear understanding of what I'm starting from! Thanks you.

It's very definitely an extrapolation, but based on what we see pretty much solely in TCW, specifically "The Mandalore Plot" episodes.

First, if you look at shots of Sundari, the Mandalorian capital, everyone is white and blond and Human. Maybe it was the animators being lazy, maybe it was a conscious choice, but it's still jarring, especially in contrast to most background shots elsewhere in the galaxy. Take a screencap of anywhere else and it's pretty mixed as far as Humans and aliens go. Not in Sundari.

Second, re: Death Watch being deported. I'm not talking about Death Watch. I'm talking about the warriors, who Satine specifically says were "exiled" to Concordia. And she and Obi-Wan have a conversation about how, even though Concordia was once an agricultural settlement, it was strip-mined to the point that forests were just starting to grow back. Extrapolating, that means Concordia probably has to import everything. I can't remember if it's Satine specifically who says it, or one of the other NMs, but they also say they presume all the warriors have all died out. And like. yikes. There's a pretty big implication there.

As for the warrior Mandalorians being POC, at the very least there are more POC characters among them than among the NMs. Clan Wren, I'm thinking of, and then. Jango and his disavowal by the NMs is a whole other can of worms that has a lot of racist overtones, imo. This post has a good breakdown of the issues regarding the Fetts, if you'd like to read it. It dips into Legends, but it's mostly based on TCW and the movies in those sections, so. There are your sources.

Edit: To clarify on why I find the "we presume the warriors all died out" so yikes. It's been about 20 years since Satine took power at most. A lot of the people exiled were probably young, to say nothing of how long people live in the gffa. How exactly are that many people supposed to have died in 20 years max without some outside factor? Add that to the fact that Concordia is mostly barren and like. Hella yikes, imo.

[taruchinator]

⭐ Explicit Content

⭐ 1.5k Words

⭐ For the @starshippingweek exchange!

“Are you sure this is okay?”

“Yusei, I swear to God if you ask that one more time—”

This was definitely not the situation Judai had anticipated getting himself into— Laying on his creaky hotel bed in the middle of nowhere, lower garments discarded into a corner of the room, with Yusei looking up at him between his legs asking for permission to eat him out for the hundredth time.

This is a fic for the Starshipping Holiday Exchange for my giftee @stardustneeko! They didn't have specific prompts, so I just went with the smut vibes they gave me and tried working something fluffy/passionate?

Regardless, I hope you like it Neeko! So sorry it's late, but I hope you have a wonderful New Year!

“Are you sure this is okay?”

“Yusei, I swear to God if you ask that one more time—”

This was definitely not the situation Judai had anticipated getting himself into— Laying on his creaky hotel bed in the middle of nowhere, lower garments discarded into a corner of the room, with Yusei looking up at him between his legs asking for permission to eat him out for the hundredth time.

The day started normally enough.

A few months after the battle against Paradox that had him thinking he'd never see his new friends ever again, Judai was pleasantly surprised to find the Stardust Dragon user at the doorstep of the hotel he was staying at.

Greetings and hugs were exchanged, with the brunet trying to wrap his head around how Yusei was even here. After a brief and summarized explanation, he made it clear he'd found a way to travel between their timelines without any repercussions, so long as they stayed out of trouble and didn't disturb important sequences of events.

“I really wanted to see you again… And Yugi-san, too! Of course!” The raven had said with that awkward handsome smile that had Judai's heart doing backflips.

After chatting and catching up on each other's lives, it was clear there was some underlying… tension between them. Certain looks and lingering touches that had both young men blushing like high school teenage girls. And even though Judai had been aware of his feelings for Yusei for a while now, he didn't know if the other felt the same.

At least not until today.

“Judai-san… I really like you. As in… more than a friend.” The riding duelist confessed to him as they were having dinner. Well, more like take out fried shrimp from Judai's favorite restaurant which got delivered to the hotel, but what does it matter? “O-Of course I completely understand if you don't see me the same way and wish for us to stay friends. Or… if you're not comfortable with that anymore…”

Not even allowing him to finish that sentence, Judai immediately leaned across the futon and pulled the man against him, crashing their lips into a fiery kiss. The brunet wasn't usually this bold— he blamed Yubel for that one, certainly.

And so, a few kisses and hot touches later, that's how they found themselves in their current position.

“I just don't want to make you uncomfortable.” Yusei steered the conversation back to their dilemma, as dripping wet lips greeted him once he pulled off Judai's underwear. “I don't want us to rush this and you end up regretting it later…”

If he was being completely honest, the brunet had lost himself in the moment that he didn't even remember he hadn't told Yusei that he was trans. But he could honestly care less.

Sure, he'd sometimes feel a bit self-conscious when looking into a mirror, but the way Yusei was holding him in such a gentle embrace, he knew the other man would still respect his wishes if something made him feel icky.

“I'm too horny to be having this discussion, Yus.” Judai half-jokingly huffed with a smile, but quickly went to reassure his partner. “I'll tell you if something doesn't sit right with me. If anything, you should be the one freaking out right now! No hard feelings if you don't wanna keep going.”

At that, Judai could see Yusei's blue gaze sharpen in a, dare he say, possessive manner? The raven spread his legs further apart, chin resting just above his pelvis as he almost purred in response. “Nothing could ever make me find you unattractive, Judai-san. If anything, this only makes you a sexier man in my book.”

Judai's face instantly lit aflame, his cunt spasming at the words coming out of Yusei’s mouth. He would've never pictured him saying such dirty things, and yet here they were. “C-Cut it out with the honorifics and just get to it already! Before I change my mind!”

With a soft chuckle, the raven smiled in return. “It would be my pleasure.”

Yusei was extremely gentle in his ministrations, rubbing soothing circles across Judai's thighs as he placed soft wet kisses here and there, leaving trails of saliva anywhere his mouth touched. The brunet hummed in delight, but could feel the ache in his core letting him know where he wanted the other man to touch him.

Thankfully his wishes were quickly granted, as a wet sensation that could only be described as Yusei's tongue began to move across his outer lips. Judai almost let out a gasp of pleasure, but was quick to slap a hand across his mouth to try and keep the noise to a minimum. The tenants were kind enough to let him crash in this room from time to time free of charge— the least he could do was spare them the embarrassment of hearing him cry out like a dog in heat.

Yusei took tentative licks, getting to know Judai's pussy as he moved along and trying to see what made him tick. Everything from outer lips to going straight inside, slurping the sweet juices that were beginning to drip down his chin as a reward from doing a good job. One hand continued to run down the brunet's leg, while the other started occasionally rubbing against his clit.

It was taking every fiber of Judai's being to keep his sounds to heavy breathing and occasional low moans. How was the riding duelist so good at this? Had he by chance done this before?

Catching his breath and placing both hands on the raven's hair, he knew he had to get his attention before things got messy. “Y-Yusei— ahh!— if you keep going I'm gonna—”

But Yusei didn't stop. In fact, those words seemed to spur him on since he started sucking on Judai's sensitive nub in delight. “Go ahead, then.”

“N-No! N-No fair! I wanna…” Judai's moans were starting to escalate by the second, making him wonder if this was even real or just another dream. “I wanna suck you off too!”

It took him about ten seconds to process what he'd just blurted out— bringing him nothing but humiliation and another red face at being caught expressing his true feelings. It was also the exact time it took Yusei to remove himself from the wet cunt in front of him to stare up at those chocolate brown eyes. A smirk had developed on his lips, which were red and swollen from their wonderful ministrations.

Slifer, the sight alone almost made him cum.

“If you wanted us to cum together all you had to do was say so.” Yusei spoke smoothly, standing up from his position at the end of the bed and then proceeding to crawl on top of the smaller male. His eyes held a glint of mischief, but for the most part, Judai knew he wasn't being mocked seriously.

It didn't make it any less embarrassing, though. “Well yeah, it's kinda unfair if I'm the only one without pants in this room…”

Another kiss, this one much less heated than the one they started with, but nevertheless filled with passion and desire for one another. Judai wrapped his arms around the other's neck, pulling him closer to feel his warmth.

Yusei's lips found themselves traveling across the brunet's neck as well, leaving feather light kisses anywhere his mouth could reach. His broad hands began to move up and down Judai's waist, until they slowly made their way under his shirt and across his chest.

That immediately broke Judai out of the pleasurable trance he was in. He pushed the man away, looking up at him in slight disgust, only to be brought back to reality as he remembered where and who he was with. “Shit! S-Sorry, Yus! I didn't mean to do that! I mean, I did, but not like that! It's just—”

“Hey, it's okay! Don't apologize.” Yusei raised his hands to show he meant no harm. His eyes were laced with concern and kept flickering between Judai's face and shirt. “I'm guessing the chest is off limits?”

“Yeah…” The brunet adjusted his binder out of habit, remembering a fleeting conversation he had with Yubel once over how he had to replace the old thing. That's the way they showed their concern. “Sorry, I didn't mean to ruin the mood. I'm not totally… fine with it yet? Ugh, it's hard to explain.”

“Like I said,” Yusei tentatively shimmied closer, holding his hand and placing a soft kiss against it, “there's no need for you to apologize for something like that.”

Judai smiled in return. He'd definitely made the right call in trusting Yusei with this.

The raven head then raised his eyebrows slightly, turning to look at him from in between his fingers since he was still holding his hand. Another purr left his lips which had Judai's body shaking in what could only be described as pure desire. “I should probably ask— how do you feel about marks?”

Another shiver and a gulp.

He could hear Yubel's teasing on the inside of his skull, but at this point he'd grown used to it.

Tonight was going to be interesting, to say the least.

✦ 𝐂𝐡𝐞𝐜𝐤 𝐌𝐲 𝐂𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐝 𝐓𝐨 𝐅𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰 𝐌𝐲 𝐒𝐨𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥𝐬! ✦

[redfurrycat]

May i respectfully ask how you can enjoy a ship if u didn't see the show for canon's sake?? 😄👀

Hey Anon! :)

Talking about Sterek are we, right?? :D

Upon reading your ask, I reflected on how I got into the Sterek fandom in the first place, and wow what a nice journey down the memory lane!!

Short answer to how I can enjoy a ship if I didn't see the show?

COLDFLASH.

Confused, are you? =D

The longer version of my babbling is under the cut, and so very sorry about that, coudn't help myself! :D

In case you don't know about the Coldflash ship, Anon, just a quick word. Tis the hero/villain ship from the Flash tv-show, aka Barry Allen/Leonard Snart.

THEM:

I started following this ig account ss.sterek [@holycafe if I'm not mistaken], liking all the coldflash posts, then getting curious about their other posts as well.

This is how Sterek came to be.

At first, it was a polite indifference, but the more I saw the sterek posts the more it got interesting to me, until one day I started searching for any Sterek content.

Until I started searching for any content on Tumblr, specifically.

Until I liked so many incorrect quotes and crack posts about this so-called Sourwolf and Spaz.

At some point their dynamic became SO addicting, I decided to start reading fics.

Did I understand any of the mentionned canon? Heck no.

(The Teen Wolf Wiki Page was a huge help in that regard, explaining to me what a kanima or a nogitsune was for example.)

Still, I remember the first fics I read were about Stiles being Pack Mom to the Wonder betas!! =D

Also fics closely (ish) related to canon...So yeah they always referred to stuff happening in the show that I usually didn't get...

With patience, some research, and LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS OF FICS, I began grasping things and characters surrounding the Sterek pair.

So I may not know about the Derek and the Stiles from the show, but I know of the fandom version of them.

Beleive me, it puzzled me how big it got to me. (BUT I'M LOVING IT!)

Like I probably have 2,000 bookmarked Sterek fics on AO3 plus the ones I've yet to read on my marked-for-later and the other ones I read without bookmarking them (rookie mistake xD).

I think the writers and the Sterek content creators have taken the grumpy-sunshiny & dry-sarcastic dynamics and wrote....how to say it? almost different characters than from the show? To the point I didn't need the show to understand them.

Nor did I wish to.

Actually, I tried watching after S06 got out, but didn't last more than 15 min maybe? My brain was too wired up on the Sterek vibe to fully appreciate the show. (Maybe my teenage ass would have liked it... But as I was watching soooo maaaaany tv-shows already, it was impossible to start watching Teen Wolf, and when I first heard of Sterek I was at Uni and really didn't have the time - But OH LORD THE NUMBER OF FICS I READ... My life saver to countless sleepless nights unable to close my eyes xD)

I've only watch THE famous Sterek Supercut!!!! :D <3

I don't know if you are aware of my Tumblr really, but if you are, you may notice I'm VERY MUCH INTO PLANES AND PILOTS these days... (okay it's been a year)....

YEAH YEAH YEAH TALKING ABOUT TOP GUN AND TOP GUN MAVERICK AND BLONDE AND BRUNET PILOTS SO WHAT OF IT?!

*I'm super chill, whatddyamean???? :D*)

Make NO mistake though, Sterek is still a favourite pair of mine, and I AM OH SO GLAD to see old and new content popping up in my dash. Still reblogging and reading!!!!!!!!!

ETERNAL STEREK!

Thank you to the original account that got me into Sterek. Thank you to THE STEREK FANDOM FOR CREATING THE MOST AMAZING CONTENT AND FICS.

Dear you go, Anon, rambles over. :D

(((I started writing the reply in the morning, and it is now the evening. I got distracted by real life stuff in the middle, and I AM EXHAUSTED. I hope you can make sense of all the babbling (or word-vomit, more like it.) I won't be reading again cause otherwise I'll keep adding stuff :D))

Have a good day Anon! ;)

[the-lil-exorcist]

Nighthawks

TIMING: Before Dark Waters LOCATION: Driftwood Diner PARTIES: @the-lil-exorcist & @vanishingreyes SUMMARY: Lil and Xó both, for very separate reasons, go to get some late night diner food. While not completely sure of the other, they do get to talking while waiting for pancakes. CONTENT WARNING: light substance abuse tw (there are mentions of people who are probably drunk near them, but they don't interact)

Lil yawned in the back of her hand as she moved to sit at the diner’s counter thinking that a coffee would be nice while she waited for the sunrise to come. She had set a ghost trap knowing that the poltergeist normally appeared specifically in a rocking chair around four am - and while she knew it was probably against ‘protocol’ she had decided that she didn’t need to wait for the old woman to get trapped and start fussing at her.  After all, it was dark enough she couldn’t knit or keep herself awake with other little activities and she’d rather not succumb to that nightmarish sleep she’d been having. Without Jonas there to take turns napping, it felt too lonely for Lil to stay even if she should. Instead she had started hanging out at twenty-four hour spots like the diner waiting on her ghost traps to catch them. It felt a lot less lonely that way, talking to the staff and catching a cup of coffee. 

It almost felt like she had friends, and honestly she started taking most of the counter to herself talking to the night shift and making sure to bring in bakery treats every occasionally. At the very least, they didn’t seem to mind her taking up real estate and telling them stories and trying new restaurant items. It usually was just Lil and the occasional lost soul, so she got a lot more comfortable then she probably should. That was until she heard Lola the waitress on duty clear her voice and Lil saw her nod to a very pretty lady that clearly was trying to find a seat away from the group on the other side of the counter  - which was pretty impossible with Lil being sprawled out. 

“Ah - sorry let me scoot down for you,” Lil said as she realized trying to gesture to her that she can sit down away from the other group. Moving her bag and gathering up her knitting to not take up as much space as she was, Lil tried not to blush as she made space even if Lola was snickering slightly earning a look from the exorcist. “I didn’t see you there - here I’m not saving a spot or anything , feel free to take any of them. ” 

___

She’d woken up in the middle of the night craving diner food. Xóchitl wasn’t sure exactly what it was, but she did remember her moms making her pancakes in the middle of the night more than once, when she was little. Which had led to her falling back asleep with syrup stuck on her cheeks and in her hair. But she’d been happy, then. Now it was more of an excuse to find something to do to distract herself - and thankfully she had no appointments on her schedule until 10am tomorrow (or was it today, now?) so she could afford to not be in tip-top shape first off in the morning.

The diner was somewhat empty - though there was a small group on one side of the counter that Xóchitl was not entirely certain she wanted to sit near. However, looking wide-eyed and lost was also distinctly not what she had planned - nor what she would settle for, at all. So instead she adjusted her posture, standing straight as she surveyed the space, before she noticed the waitress on duty clear her throat and nod towards where another woman was sitting, knitting materials and the like spread out all around her.

“Oh, it’s fine.” She flashed the briefest of smiles. “But thank you.” She sat down, only one space away from the other woman, before ordering a plate of pancakes and a cup of coffee, no sugar, no cream. “I’m Xóchitl.” Finally turning to face the other woman, eyes glossing over the way her hands fit against the knitting. “You are sure I’m not bothering you?”

___

Lil settled back into her seat, a little more chagrined then she normally was at the diner. After all, normally she’d be talking off Lola’s ears, but now she actually had to work. While the others at the counter certainly counted as customers, Lil knew that they didn’t care what she said and doubted they would remember. 

So instead Lil ducked her head a little going to make sure she hadn’t messed up her knitting as she waited for the other to settle in - holding back an admonishment for saying thank you. After all, Lola was a - damn Lil couldn’t ever seem to remember. She wasn’t a fae at least and Lil wasn’t. So instead she went back to the soft pink yarn she was carefully maneuvering in her hands. After all, Jonas and her were likely going to still be here in the fall, and it was going to get cold. He was going to need another sweater.  At the other telling Lil their name, she paused and looked up meeting the others eyes. “You’re not bothering me at all. I’m Lil,” She said with a smile. “Also you picked well, the pancakes are good.” 

___

“Xóchitl,” she responded. “I just know some people like their space, so I figured it was only polite to ask,” she offered a warm smile to Lil. “I figure pancakes are a good choice almost always. Can I get you anything, since I’ve decidedly invaded your space?” The other woman was beautiful, and already seemed like a much better choice than her other seating partner options.

“Weirdly, there’s surprisingly few 24-hour places back in Boston. There’s rules and stuff about that, so it’s wild that up in a town in Maine, there’s one.” Xóchitl shook her head. “Tangent, not what you needed to hear.” The waitress came over and Xóchitl put in an order for her pancakes, turning back to Lil and nodding towards the waitress as if to say ‘please, order something’.

___

“Nice to meet you,” Lil said, matching the other’s smile. She appreciated what the other said, and usually Lil was pretty interested in being alone, but lately talking to people seemed like a good way of keeping herself awake. After all, she did need to find her family and knowing more people was going to be helpful too. “Fair enough, but I don’t mind at all. Also they do pretty much everything well here, and I’m not just saying that because Lola will give me an evil eye if I don’t.” She said with a joking manner. At the offer of something Lil tilted her head and said, “Oh I wouldn’t want to impose.” 

At the talk of there not being any twenty four hour places Lil pondered  that for a moment.  “Huh. Yeah I’ve never heard about something like that up here. Although I think it’s a bit surprising there’s no 24 hour places in Boston. I figured you’d need some. Although I guess that can’t be helped if there’s regulations on that.” After all, Lil would have been rather unhappy to not have anywhere to go when it was this late and she couldn’t go home. Although she partially expected that this place was mostly open for the college students and the people with night jobs like her, surely they had that in the bigger cities too. At the gesture Lil couldn’t help but comply, not wanting to cause any friction with her new talking buddy, “Could I get a coffee when you’ve got the chance?” 

Turning back to Xóchitl, Lil asked, “ So are you from Boston then? I think I’ve been there a few times, but I don’t know too much about it.” Lil was well traveled, but it was honestly mostly places that were haunted. She never really had time to see the sights, so it was interesting to hear others talk about it.  

____

“You as well,” the woman was at least more tolerable than some in town. Which sounded more like something Xóchitl might’ve said as a child, trying to fit in with the seventy-year-old white ladies on World’s End Isle, rather than something present-day her would say. Certainly, she could still come off more than just a bit self-focused, but that was more out of protection than anything else. Not out of snobbishness or a feeling that she was better than everyone else. She just was. Was, period, full stop. Not better, not worse. She just happened to have an especially interesting (and terrible) childhood, but she’d used that line once to pick up a guy at a bar, and had felt immediately and entirely ill about it after, and resolved to never do that again. “You wouldn’t be imposing. I asked you.” She nodded. “I just figure pancakes are always a good choice.”

Xóchitl nodded, “yes, I suppose so. But we don’t really have them, it’s not a fancy city in the same way that New York is, and there’s maybe rules or something? I don’t know, I never learned that.” Thankfully, her new companion ordered a coffee, at least, which wasn’t much, but it was something, and she’d settle for that for now, at least.

“From… yeah.” This was a stranger, so she could lie, at least for now. “Well, mostly. I think of it as where I’m from, though if I could pick anywhere, I’d pick Monterrey - Mexico, not the California one - because my mom’s from there. But Boston suffices well enough. How about you? Are you from here or elsewhere?”

____

Lil nodded at the idea that the other had, and honestly it was a fair enough statement. After all, she never offered help herself unless she meant it. It was something drilled down to her core, if you offer something no matter how small you have to mean it. It’s why Lil, despite not being a fae or even particularly principled, only gave what she meant to give.  It wasn’t something she was exactly used to other people believing though. “I get that. Although I’m not super hungry at the moment.” 

Lil, after all, had been there for awhile and Lola had insisted she eat something when she came in. She had appreciated the care, even if she didn’t really understand why. At the comment that Boston wasn’t fancy, she wondered what cities would be considered that. “That’s fair. I mean I think New York is pretty famous for not sleeping right?” Lil said with a little bit of a smile, thinking that it was a pretty silly joke herself. She was pretty sure she’d been to the city, but again it was mostly blurred with other cities at the moment. She was to tired to parcel them out well. 

As they started to talk, Lil decided that it probably wasn’t super rude to start knitting again, still looking up at Xóchitl as she spoke and only glancing down. After all, Lil was pretty used to knitting in the dark at this point, she didn’t need to constantly look at it. “Oh neat. I’ve never been to Mexico, but I bet that’s a lovely place. Especially if your mom’s from there,” Lil said nodding a little. She wished she was somewhere else sometimes - well most of the time. It wasn’t the town exactly, but the obligations that were here. While Lil wasn’t exactly free to do what she wanted anywhere, she did feel more freedom on the road. It didn’t come with legacies after all. “I’m from here,” Lil said honestly, “Although I just got back in town this year. Are you settling here well? I know it can be quite a change in atmosphere even if you’re just coming up from Boston. - Which if you don’t mind me asking where in Boston are you from? One of my friends settled there so I’m always curious.”  It felt like a good way to keep the conversation going, although she very much doubted that she’d met Jameson - mostly because Jamie was pretty introverted and unlikely to make friends.

___

“Fair enough. I don’t know why I’m hungry, but it’s nothing to stress over, and if it means I get pancakes, then so be it.” Xóchitl did her best to keep her voice on the more gentle end of things – not that she ever considered herself a harsh person, but still. Gentle was better, especially in the middle of the night, especially with strangers in a diner. Or rather, a stranger in a diner.

“I think it’s called the city that never sleeps, yeah. God knows when I -” she frowned for a moment, before deciding that maybe it wasn’t too much to share that she’d gone to school there. After all, anybody who looked her up would know she’d gotten her doctorate there. “When I lived there, I didn’t always sleep a lot, though probably due to a lot of schooling work.” And clubbing, and occasional bouts of insomnia. But her companion didn’t need to know that. “But yes, it’s famous for that, yeah. I will say, I crave pizza at 1am sometimes, and you just can’t really get that anywhere else I’ve lived.”

The other woman took up her knitting again and Xóchitl could only be said to look impressed at what her companion was doing. “It is. You are?” The fact that the woman had also been away for a time and only recently returned made Xóchitl lose focus on everything else she was thinking about. “Beacon Hill area. Near the Common? The Public Gardens? I – well, I was born here, too. Where did your friend settle, if you don’t mind my asking? Also just curious.”

___

“To be fair, it is that time of night,” Lil said with a bit of a smile. She usually found that she ate at least once when she was pulling an all-nighter. It always seemed to be something like ‘lunch’. Still, it felt a little different to be around the town this late at night and eating. It was almost more soothing than during the day. Less busy and chaotic at the very least. She wondered if that’s how Jonas felt in the morning when he was baking bread. 

Lil listened at Xó talk about New York and wondered idly how she must have been like there. Lil found that she was a little different everywhere she’d been. Sometimes she was more extroverted and went and talked to people - and other times she hadn’t talked to anyone other than Jonas for days. It all depended. Hearing her hesitate on saying that she’d gone to University there made Lil pause, thinking that maybe she had overstepped somewhere. “I can imagine. Must be loads to do even at night. - Oh man getting pizza at 1am that’s got to help with anything. I don’t think there’s anywhere around here that’ll do that.” She was starting to babble, but managed to stop herself as her knitting speed picked up. 

Looking back to her, Lil saw her looking at her knitting and for a moment her hands stuttered slightly before picking back up. “Yup,” Lil said with a little nod. It wasn’t uncommon for people to be surprised. She actually thought she matched Wicked’s Rest pretty well, but hell she wasn’t sure if that was a bragging point. “Oh you were born here? ” Lil said, catching that bit and continuing, “ No I don’t mind at all - he ended up in Dorchester - I think that’s what it was called. I tried to get him to go to South Boston - He’s from Ireland originally you see - but he just scoffed at me.” Lil said with a chuckle. Pulling a bit of knitting out of her back that was a cardigan with a shamrock in green with a grey background and black border she continued, “Actually just finished his Christmas present before you came in.” 

___

“You are still being very kind to be so fair to me.” Xóchitl certainly wasn’t about to complain about that, but she also knew that this particular stranger had to be one of the kinder ones she’d come across, given her immediate readiness to be so fair, and so she decided to take it as a positive sign (her moms would have to be proud of that, jumping to a first positive rather than an immediate negative or neutral).

“There’s certainly never a shortage of options,” she offered Lil a small smile. “Not that I took part in all of them – though to be fair, I don’t know if that’s impossible unless you’re someone who literally never sleeps, and that itself is impossible because you’d have serious, possibly life-threatening consequences without ever sleeping.” She chewed on her lip – not a typical action for Xóchitl but she had to wonder, if only for a moment, if the facts she shared were too much for an initial meeting with someone. Still, what was said was said and she offered a nod of sympathy towards Lil’s remark about there being nowhere around here to do that.

She gave a nod to Lil’s question about her being born in town. Nothing more, so as to not encourage questions, though if questions came up, Xóchitl would do her best to answer them to the fullest extent of her ability, without giving anything unnecessary away. “There is a place in Boston called Dorchester, yeah. Ah, well, yes, that is the stereotypically Irish part of the city, though there’s a lot of Irish people throughout the whole place.” Her gaze followed Lil’s hands as she pulled out the cardigan. “Holy shit, you’re incredibly impressive with the whole knitting thing.”

___

Lil couldn’t help the snort and chuckle that came from the other’s observation. “What can I say? I try to see the positive.” It wasn’t exactly true, Lil was probably more of a pragmatist then an optimist, but it seemed at least a little more quick witted to claim the latter rather than the former. 

“It seems like a world of possible adventures though, it would be hard to sleep knowing that’s possible,” Lil responded thinking about her own travels lightly wondering if she would have ended up as listless as she was now if she was in a big city like that. Lil constantly wanted to move, her mind always on the next place, almost avoiding sentimentality and other binding things. It seemed like the only place she’d ever made those roots was here, and maybe she always intended that.  “ But yeah I think going to everything would make you a little sleep deprived for normal company,” Lil said with a bit of a smile that she hoped wasn’t too weary. After all, she hadn’t slept all that much lately. She was always jealous of people who could - she’d never been good at sleeping even before coming back - but she figured it came with the territory. 

Lil noticed how quiet the other seemed to get about being from this town, and figured it wasn’t a story she needed. After all, it wasn’t like her own story was pleasant, and sometimes nightmares were better left unvoiced. Instead, she latched onto a subject that was lighter. 

 Lil laughed and said, “I knew it. He would end up in an area accidentally filled with Irish people anyway. He is a walking case for irony being a cheat for hilarity.” 

At the complement Lil paused for a moment and said, “Oh - I appreciate that. Just a hobby I picked up. It’s pretty calming.” Also, if she was being honest, it was because she could do it in the dark when she was waiting for ghosts to show up. She also wouldn’t have to wake up to do it when Jonas was asleep, her steady clicking sounds let alone her shouts not being able to wake him up. “It can become second nature pretty quickly if you ever wanted to pick it up.” 

___

Makes one of us, held itself back just behind Xóchitl’s lips. Which wasn’t entirely fair, she supposed. She did try to see the positive sometimes. It just wasn’t always easy. It wasn’t as though she stewed herself in negativity either. Always in the middle-ground. Or always trying to be that way.

Pragmatic, she supposed her mothers would call her. Mackenzie had been an optimist, and look where it had gotten her.

Which wasn’t fair to say at all, but there were some days where Xóchitl wondered if she’d been more careful, if she’d still be alive. Which wasn’t any sort of a productive train of thought, but it was one she nonetheless had – more than she’d care to admit. “Yeah, exactly.” Putting down real roots anywhere seemed nearly impossible, and yet she’d found herself back in this town,  back in some sort of a home, even if it wasn’t a place she wanted to call home any longer. She’d spent too long floating around in the city, and maybe that was why New York City had felt good, in a way. Because she could disappear. As sad as Mackenzie’s death was, it hadn’t been national newsworthy, and even if she still thought that her friend deserved to be known by all, at least she didn’t have to be “that dead girl’s best friend” wherever she went.

“Sounds like it.” She commented, taking another sip of her drink.

A nod at the comment about the knitting. “I can see that. It’s good to have things that do that, I think.” It could have been a question, but Xóchitl firmly ended the sentence. It was safer to be definitive. “I’ll consider it, though I’m not sure if I’d be good at it. Still, do you offer lessons?” She raised an eyebrow. “I could pay, if you did.”

___

Lil wasn’t quite sure what the other was thinking, looking over at her, but she figured that they might have more in common then they knew. If that was true, then it was better not to poke Xó and instead let the calm of the night settle between them. It was soothing, at the very least, at this time of night. It almost made Lil forget everything that was pressing in, and she hoped her companion thought the same. It was moments like this that made her remember the dark wasn’t always so scary.  Taking a sip of her coffee, after putting down her needles for a moment, Lil nodded. “Yeah, It’s pretty relaxing, all things considered.” At the idea of lessons Lil tilted her head and laughed, “For you? Sure. I’d love to. Although you don’t need to pay me. You’re nice to talk too and that’s enough payment for me.” Thinking about it for a moment she reached into her bag and pulled out a piece of paper and a nub of a pencil and wrote down her number, not wanting to impose too much. After all, she wasn’t quite sure if she was serious. Writing out her name and phone number she placed it  near Xó’s plate and said, “Here’s my number. Feel free to reach out if you want to learn. Or you know, if you have any other fun facts about Boston or New York. I’m not picky.”

[i-can-even-burn-salad]

One thing that absolutely baffles me about the push to use the "For you" as default is how badly it works.

I use it a lot. Probably more than I should. Every time I am bored, and on web almost every time I return (because if you don't open the dash first, you can still see the lil number telling you how many unread posts there are, but I digress.)

And. It's. Shit.

Lately, the posts there have been reasonably in line with what I look at here, but:

I definitely had things recommended before that took a straight lane down to tag block list with a shiver down my spine.

I had a post at top of the recommendeds being filtered for post content blocked term (: Definitely "for me".

I like one writing prompt of that one big blog, and it's swamped with them for half a day.

Similar with other posts/posts types. Hey you liked that one autism post? Say no more, that's all you will see for days straight.

It shows me the same post(s) over and over and over again, to the point where I had to block a blog giving some writing advice I did not like because I was about to strangle them through my screen after seeing it for 3 days in a row.

I repeat: For a single day, it shows the same things over and over again. In theory, I guess, it works with endless scrolling, but you cannot endless scroll. Close the app, hell, switch tab, and you're back at the top.

I still remember when I was making a new blog to test something and did not follow any blogs to see what would happen (end of last year), and dash showed me the same twitter/insta/tiktok memes over and over and over, and no matter how often I said "this is not for me" they returned.

If this were my default experience, I'd be gone in a heartbeat. That's not even commenting on all the other "what the fuck" moments the "algorithm" gives me. On web, I can luckily block most of that crap with xkit.

I have a lot of mutuals, my blog has a theme, I use tags - and visiting my own blog did show me a grid of 9 "related" posts that were people I had never seen in my life with content that had absolutely nothing to do with writing.

I browse a part of the app, see recommended post thumbnails, get interested, click on it, and it's a completely different post.

I used to leave blazed posts enabled - until I got several very suggestive blazes on one day, unable to dismiss them, and turned it off. If I volunteer to see any kind of ad/algorithm content, and you leave me unable to say "nothing like this and specifically this post not ever again" I will stop looking at them alltogether.

As long as it's not forced upon me, as long as I can catch up with the people I actually follow during breakfast and scroll the recommends on a low and on my time, I am absolutely not against more ways to find content I like. The problem is, currently...

It just. Does. Not. Work.

And making that the default is absolutely bonkers.

[loublu8]

can you just ramble? ramble for as long as you want. as a fellow late 00s brit who's into some of the same interests as you (specifically vida the vet, charlie and lola, me too, balamory, abadas, and literally just any other cbeebies show i grew up with) i'd love to hear it!

if it's a ramble you want, a ramble you shall get. In other words here's like, my complete history with CBeebies. As a 08' kid, I was born in a weird transitional period for the channel. This was one year after they introduced the now iconic blocks of Get Set Go, Discover and Do and Big Fun Time, and Chris and Pui were going to move on from pres in 09' to work on Show Me Show Me. Postman Pat was just fresh from it's big SDS overhaul, which people either loved or hated (I think I liked it as a kid but looking back on it, it's nothing to get worked up over IMO, I just don't get why Pat can do James Bond-esque stunts now and is perfectly content riding a motorcycle.). Oh, and there was this little show about a garden of the night that began the year prior, I doubt that you've heard of it. Yeah, In the Night Garden was probably the first major CBeebies show I remember getting obsessed with, and looking back at it? I honestly don't know why. It's not a bad show at all, don't get me wrong, but I don't know why I was so obsessed over it to the point of having this dancing Igglepiggle toy as a kid.

Also, I remember loving the Hahoos as a young'un, part because a CBeebies magazine I got ages ago had little Hahoo toys. I took them on holiday to Turkey with me, yeah can you tell I'm autistic? I don't think I have them anymore, and if I do they're probably all scuffed up and missing paint. But that's okay, I can easily buy them on eBay to fill a place in 2 year old me's hear- HOW MUCH FOR 5 SMALL PIECES OF PLASTIC?

Yeah I didn't know these things were going for this much until my mum saw someone on Facebook ranting on how stupid expensive they are nowadays about a year ago. Anyways, on the topic of CBeebies' Bedtime Hour (and A Quarter nowadays), there's one elephant in the room I must discuss, the closedown screen.

This slightly green thing telling you to get some sleep absolutely terrified me as a kid though, it wasn't on the same level as the Eastenders theme's doofs and Christmas crackers if I remember correctly, but it still gave me PTSD for years on end. (Hey, at least I wasn't around for when the channel started, I really wanna meet whoever thought it was a great idea to make this screen bright blinding pink right after the goodnight song settled everyone down, just so I can tell them how dumb that idea was.)

Like all things I was spooked of as a kid, I got over it when I was getting nostalgic for the brand. Speaking of closedown screens, how is the closedown screen for the 2023 rebrand really good? Like, it would make a great screensaver without the text. You can say what you want about the new logo (which I think is fine, it fits in with the rest of the modern BBC branding so it succeeds in that aspect), but you gotta admit they did a really good job with revamping the idents for the channel.

Anyways, onto more of my favourite CBeebies shows. Charlie and Lola is easily up there as one of my favourites. It'sMy mum distinctly recalls taking me to the live stage show (which, live stage shows are a whole other can of worms I can talk about), and I couldn't remember much about it so I researched it, and it looks like they did a ridiculously good job of translating the show to a stage play while keeping the show's unique artstyle.

Balamory, obviously as a CBeebies viewer prior to 2016, I know what a Balamory is. I don't need to explain it. Though one weird memory I have is I remember going past the local barbers one day and seeing a Balamory rerun airing. I dunno why they showed CBeebies in the barbers of all places. On the other hand, Me Too!, which to me always felt like Balamory, but a wee bit worse (because that's exactly what it was!), and I don't remember my exact feelings towards it as a kid, but as a teenager, I became obsessed with it after found the Me Too! YouTube channel after I was pretty much done binge-watching Abadas. It quickly became my main comfort show, like if I'm not in the mood for anything else, just stick an episode of Me Too! on, there's like 150 episodes and I'm not sure if I've even seen over half of them. I've seen more MT! eps than Balamory though, probably cause it's more easily accessible. With Balamory, you gotta go on the internet archive for episodes of that. Abadas was one of the shows I distinctly remembered the intro for, though I misremembered it with Baby Jake of all shows (they came out around the same time). I went and revisited it one January day in 2023, around the time I was starting to put my Bubble Guppies hyperfix on the backseat as the show was about to end, and instantly fell in love with it. Really wish the production company behind the show didn't go bust as there was a lot of cool supplementary material with the show as well, they did a bunch of shorts on Vimeo which I happily recommend.

Eventually, I fell out of CBeebies around 2014 or so as, well, I was getting older and was ready to move on to more grown up shows (this is coming from the same kid who kept actively watching Nick Jr. well into his teenage years). But then I was channel surfing at my nan's around October 2019 or so and decided to stick CBeebies on for fun after deciding whatever was being shown on Challenge was too boring, I guess. Something Special was probably the show that launched me back into my CBeebies hyperfix, yea of all shows. Completely forgot the show used Makaton and as someone who was interested in sign language I went on a binge-spree to study all of Justin's signs. I became fairly competent at it. I got into Hey Duggee for a a bit as well, known as every parent's lifeline apparently. The game show episode is one of my favourites, mostly due to all the fun references they crammed into the episode. As a fan of the shows we people call game, it was a fun surprise. I also rediscovered some of my old childhood favourites that were still getting reruns. Swashbuckle was a bit too recent for me to have recalled watching it as a kid but my brother was certainly around for it and Tree Fu Tom, which was still rerunning at the time. Charlie and Lola still aired reruns, and back in 2019 I kinda just glanced at without much thought before realising a few years later that it was actually really good. Night Garden made me cry of nostalgia, and I also thought Baby Jake was the biggest feverdream ever conceived on television. I even was one of the weirdo's who listened to CBeebies Radio, though honestly there's no point in listening to it live as you can find all it's content on the Sounds app. Admittedly, I haven't gotten super into Bluey. Y'know, the most popular preschool show of this decade that didn't begin in this decade? Yeah I watched about 10-15 episodes of it, said "wow, this is one of the best preschool shows ever crafted", and then moved on to watching the same 40 Blue's Clues & You! episodes again. I'm sure if I force myself to binge watch it more I'll fall head over heels in love with it though. So if I haven't gone crazy for Bluey, what modern CBeebies shows have I gone crazy for? Funnily enough, two that released within the span of around 5 months. The Game Catchers was the first one I got into. I just kept binging episodes and instantly fell in love with it. Always thought the show's main concept was really, REALLY good. Teaching kids about outdoor games in the day and age of iPads is a really smart move. Don't really see many people in the fanbase yet unfortunately, it's certainly one my favourite CBeebies shows from the last 5 years. Also it has absolutely ruined me as any time I hear or say the phrase "so cute" I immediately have to connect it to Nina.

Vida on the other hand I pretty naturally got into. I checked it out, watched the first few episodes, and thought it was pretty good, but never intended it to become my next big hyperfixation. I was sooooooo wrong. I've always had a soft spot for shows with cute animals (Was a big LPS 2012 fan way back when) so naturally this was always destined to be a show I'd fall in love with. I also love all the characters in the show too. Pippen's my personal favourite, but Zigzag is a REALLY close second though. She's a cute bunny who canonically has ADHD. What's not to love.

Okay I think I've talked enough and I've been typing this out for like, 2 hours, I really need some sleep. I could talk about all sorts of other CBeebies shows I enjoy (LazyTown, Tish Tash, JoJo & Gran Gran, Carrie & David's Popshop's a more recent one I've binged from the days of old) but I've talked enough so yeah.

[ratherembarrassing]

2023: weeks 7, 8, 9, 10 and 11 [13 feb to 19 mar]

this is madness. it's been a crazy busy month. i'm currently in my fourth hotel. let's go.

VACATION!

new york: greenwich village was home for the first week of my vacation. a part of manhattan that i liked to visit a lot when i lived in brooklyn but never a place i've managed to spend as much time as i would like... and still have not. the marlton hotel on 8th was delightful although i encountered far too many australians for my liking. the lobby bar was, as warned of in every single review i read, absolutely packed with people just chilling/drinking/working at all hours of the day, but it was honestly a hoot.

new york coffee: i am notoriously hateful of american coffee, because it's revolting, but the game has been changed in the last few years. every morning i went somewhere different as i set out for the day, and every day i was rewarded handsomely with a decent-to-perfect latte. thank you for embracing the milk based espresso game, new york. i cannot extend my compliments to california.

art: i managed to hit up two art museums i've been to previously (the met, the guggenheim) and two that i had not (the whitney, the frick) while in new york, and the completely out of character pre-modern kick i've been on heavily influenced where i had the most fun.

the guggenheim is home to my very favourite painting, franz marc's yellow cow, but half the permanent collection was down for an exhibition, so he was gone. however, i had seen marc's fighting cows at the met a few days earlier, in which my good friend the yellow cow is hanging out in the background, so i was content.

the met was full of all the classical architecture things i have spent the last few months being weird about, and so is every street in new york, so i was having a great time and my phone is full of photos of completely random buildings all over manhattan. but there was something really satisfying about walking through parts of the building i viscerally remember not having any interest in previously and being like, i know you guys now.

the frick was a similar experience, kind of, in that i have a clear memory of passing on going because i knew it was full of old paintings. not exactly my thing, for the most part, more of an incidental acquaintanceship from often being housed in the same building as art i prefer. i don't remember what specifically prompted me to go this time, but an inadvertent consequence of deep diving architectural history is that i acquired a whole art history education that i never really had, and like, what a difference that makes.

the whitney had a hopper exhibition showing that had pretty much everything he ever painted except for nighthawks, which was weird.

shows!: "are you going to see any shows while you're there?" "is there any other reason to even go to new york?"

this was documented as it happened, but i experienced classical music live for the first time while unintentionally very, very drunk. i've settled on this having been an incredible experience, well done me.

i saw funny girl. it's actually incomprehensible how good lea was in this given that, okay, so. wait, context. so what actually happened was, i had tickets for funny girl on the friday night and the ny phil on saturday night, and lea was out sick friday AND the saturday matinee. i got an email about her being out at 3pm but didn't see it until 6pm, and somehow i still managed to switch both tickets to seats in almost the exact same location and recovered like $100 of the original price in the process. so after being off sick for two shows lea was, honestly, fucking incredible. it's so irritating, but it is what it is.

jessica chastain is currently doing a doll's house (i think it technically opened on march 9 but it's been in previews for weeks). this was wild, as far as these things go. extremely minimal, bordering on avant-garde maybe or just throwing a lot of singular things that other productions have done into a pot together. spoilers for the key staging moments: it started with nora on stage for a solid 10 minutes before curtain (there was no curtain), while the house lights were still up and people were still wandering into their seats and talking, and ended with her walking out through a door at the back of the stage directly onto the street behind the theatre in a moment so baffling i am still chuckling every time i think about it. it wasn't perfect but it's going to stay with me.

an assortment of other things i bought/experienced in new york

an australian goes to an nhl game: i thought i could come to like any sport, but this was really just not my thing. also, the shouting from the crowd during the national anthem made me genuinely uneasy.

the post-metrocard subway. people had commented to me and have asked since if new york "felt different", and this might be the only place where it did feel different. the subway felt empty, and nobody uses the emergency exit anymore, and no more metrocard just feels wrong.

an american biscuit from popeyes. it was delicious. at the time i said i was coming around on the biscuit thing, but then i had one with gravy in california and it was just wrong.

a whole bunch of writing implements and notebooks from good for the study, which happened to be across the street from my hotel. it's maybe one of the hardest things to buy in australia now, as everything else has become easier and this one specific category of goods has not. i spent so much money it was ridiculous. ask me about my pens.

the apple charger adapter kit, because i accidentally packed my european adapter and had planned to use my apple brick exclusively as my means of charging all my shit. so now i have one for everywhere on earth, and that feels like a challenge.

which also lead to me walking past zitomer, because somehow i spent half my time in new york on the upper east side, and tar had reminded me of that new york magazine article about the women who shop at zitomer, and anyway now i own $22 lipbalm in a zitomer lipstick tube.

also, because travel seems to somehow always destroy my hands, i now own hand cream that smells like orange tic tacs. that was from whole foods, though.

los angeles: i drove! in california! pulling out of that avis parking lot was honestly one of the more terrifying things i've ever done. socal was experiencing some weather, and i had to drive to long beach, and i'd spent 20 minutes trying to figure out the carplay controls in a mazda (fucking insane) and it was going to get dark soon, so i had to go. in the end it was great, and the last day i spent driving all over the place and i am fully committed to doing the entire PCH as a trip sometime soon.

the pie bar: it was february 24, which is twin peaks day, so i dragged everyone to this place we found on google, and i ate cherry pie for the first time and it was fantastic, and like the ten or so of the rest of us all had different kinds of pies and everyone enjoyed the hell out of them, so this place was fucking awesome. also they gave us a candle to stick in leah's pie so we could sing happy birthday.

broadway cocktail lounge's karaoke night: long beach really was batting well above its average this night. maybe it was the weather keeping everyone local, but there was a woman who sounded like stevie nicks who did gold dust woman and i'm honestly still thinking about her all these weeks later.

santa monica: a lovely place to be! i stayed at the fairmont, which was very funny because i had previously had brunch in the restaurant there without realising it was the same place. anyway, five star hotels are hilarious and i love them. they brought my ubereats order to my door at nearly midnight, which makes them infinitely better than the intercons that i've stayed at that make you come down and get it yourself. i will but up with that at a four star hotel, but not at a five! i'm kidding, but not really lmao.

disneyland!: go on a rainy monday in february! waltz right into every right! do the star wars rides twice! i fucking love disneyland and will go in the heat when it's packed and queue for an hour for most things, but this was super special just getting to do anything. the new star wars ride is so fucking awesome! take your kids to disneyland!

then i ate a final lax panda express and headed home.

FIVE SHOWS IN TWELVE DAYS!

angel olsen @ melbourne recital centre: i will admit i was jetlagged as fuck and might have nodded off for a second in my front row seat. nonetheless, what a babe.

bikini kill @ forum: happy international womens day! this was all ages gig with a lot of tiny little kiddos there with their cool mums and it was a great time to be in a room with a lot of people there for the vibe.

florence and the machine @ rod laver: that woman is a god damn witch, and i will not be told otherwise. fucking mesmerizing. it's just a fucking treat to see the person who makes some of your favourite music be incredible in front of you.

lorde @ sydney myer music bowl: MUNA opened for her and they slapped.

carly rae jepsen @ forum: the most fun i've had at a concert in ages. i was sweaty and exhausted and full of joy by the end, and unlike everyone else there i didn't get covid. midway through the show i got a text that my 6.30am flight the next morning had been cancelled and that was also very fun!

haloumi baos at blondie bar: this is the always busy spot outside the melbourne recital centre / southbank theatre. they came with pineapple jam. it was so good i went back a week later for pre-lorde dinner and sat on a tiny tiny bench to eat them.

sydney: i am in it. i'm here for work, but yesterday i had brunch at pina in potts point, and this morning i had brunch at porch and parlor and wandered around bondi before i had to spend a few hours working. i'm here for another week and a half, so tell me fun things to do.

THREE COMEDIES IN TWO WEEKS!

am i being unreasonable (season 1, bbc): i watched this on the flight to lax, i had no idea what it was and no way to find out, and let me tell you: that was wild. one of the most intriguing and fucked up and funny things i've watched in a while.

extraordinary (season 1, hulu/disney+): this show is so charming i want to scream. luke rollason, oh my god. he's just a little guy!

the flatshare (season 1, paramount+): i dunno. did anyone else watch this?

okay i'm done, goodbye.

[sapphim]

Sibling Rivalry - Legacy

There is quite a lot of sibling content in Legacy DLC, as opposed to MotA or the late basegame, and there is correspondingly more approval-locked sibling dialogue. See #sibling rivalry for more. This post contains all the approval-specific sibling dialogue in Legacy with the exception of the Malcolm's Will sidequest, which will be posted separately for length.

Banter - Legacy (Warden Bethany)

Bethany: No, I suppose not. Attack from the dark, no warning. I see enough of that.

[friendly]

Bethany: It's not what I would have chosen, this life, but given everything else we've lost…

Bethany: Well, you do this for a few years, you learn not to take second chances for granted.

[rival]

Bethany: Thanks to… this life.

Blue Hawke: I'm sorry. I couldn't lose you, and I did anyway.

Bethany: The way of this world, I think.

Purple Hawke: You'd have less to say about it if you were, you know, dead.

Bethany: Sometimes I wonder.

Red Hawke: You'd still rather be dead?

Bethany: I am dead. It's just… taking its time.

---

Bethany: That corruption… that's what I was saved from.

[friendly]

Bethany: You wouldn't have let it go that far, though. You'd have done anything.

Blue Hawke: It shouldn't have been necessary.

Bethany: Maybe. But thanks.

Purple Hawke: No worries, everything is dandy now.

Bethany: Oh, quite.

Red Hawke: And I would again.

Bethany: I know.

[rival]

Bethany: If you call it saved, anyway.

Blue Hawke: I prefer it over the alternative.

Purple Hawke: A much nicer word than "dead."

Red Hawke: I do, and you should too.

---

Fenris: You must hate the darkspawn, after what they did to your home.

Bethany: I have a lot of hate, but it's not so focused. It's… deeper for a Warden.

[friendly]

Bethany: It's been a struggle to let that go.

Fenris: But you have?

Bethany: Let's call it a work in progress.

[rival]

Bethany: Some days you just have to work with what you have.

Fenris: Does that help? Accepting it like that?

Bethany: I'll let you know when I know.

Banter - Legacy (Warden Carver)

Carver: Mother shouldn't have to deal with this. I give her enough to worry about.

Hawke: Hard to call this your fault.

Carver: Trouble follows our name, I guess. The price of potential.

[friendly]

Carver: We Wardens will eventually save the world, and you… well, I'm sure you'll amount to something.

Blue Hawke: That's the plan.

Purple Hawke: Trying hard, brother.

Red Hawke: Right. Funny.

[rival]

Carver: At least you stay close to home. Must be nice.

Blue Hawke: I don't think you know what I do.

Carver: Maybe that's best.

Purple Hawke: Oh yes, bon-bons and peppermints until I am absolutely stuffed.

Carver: All right, I didn't mean it like that.

Red Hawke: What's that supposed to mean?

Carver: I, er, nothing. Nothing. Let's just figure this out.

---

[friendly, act 2]

Carver: The corruption of that… man, that's how bad it can get? Never thought I'd see it myself.

[any, act 3]

Carver: The corruption of that… man. I've been a Warden how long, and I've never seen anything like that.

Carver: I guess that's why I'm still alive. To stop that.

Blue Hawke: I don't envy you the job.

Carver: The attacks that brought me here were almost a welcome diversion. A normal assault with a normal enemy.

Carver: I should have known, really. Nothing normal about us.

Purple Hawke: And dumb luck. That's the other reason you're alive.

Carver: (Laughs.) Credit where due, I suppose.

Red Hawke: First things first, Warden.

Carver: Right. You, then everything else. Got it.

---

[rival, act 2]

Carver: That… man, and how corrupted he is? Remember that. That's what I'm fighting for.

Hawke: Like you volunteered. Is that the story now?

Carver: And what was so inspiring about buying our way out of Lowtown? At least I'm chasing something.

Blue Hawke: It is appreciated.

Carver: You're damn right it is.

Blue Hawke: Then we agree.

Carver: Well… good.

Blue Hawke: Good.

Purple Hawke: I'll arrange a "thanking queue" when we're back in Kirkwall.

Carver: Sure, make fun of the end of the world.

Purple Hawke: Best time for it, I'd think.

Red Hawke: Besides my coattail?

Carver: You're an ass. / Charming as ever, Sister.

Banter - Legacy (Templar Carver)

Fenris: You must hate the darkspawn, after what they did to your home.

Carver: Absolutely. And the magic that brought them to this world.

Fenris: Then we're agreed on something.

[friendly]

Blue Hawke: I'm not sure that's healthy.

Carver: (Laughs.) For me or him?

Purple Hawke: Tempered by an understanding that not all mages bear responsibility, right?

Carver: Yes, yes, reason rules over all.

Red Hawke: "Magic" or "mages?"

Carver: There are exceptions. Occasionally.

[rival]

Blue Hawke: I'm not sure that's healthy.

Carver: For mages, definitely not.

Purple Hawke: Tempered by an understanding that not all mages bear responsibility, right?

Carver: Oh, stow it.

Red Hawke: "Magic" or "mages?"

Carver: Depends on the mage, doesn't it?

End of DLC - Legacy (Warden/Circle Bethany)

Blue Hawke: [Hard work never gets easier.] He did what he had to, just like all of us.

Bethany: And I owe him so much. Both him and Mother.

Bethany: I wish...

[friendly]

Bethany: Well, perhaps it doesn't matter.

Bethany: Thank you for taking care of everything, [Sister/Brother].

[rival]

Bethany: Well, it doesn't matter what I wish.

Bethany: Take care, [Sister/Brother].

---

Purple Hawke: [Trouble and Hawkes go together.] The alternative being quiet lives as maids and stableboys.

Bethany: An idea not without charm.

Bethany: But you're right, being "normal" would have required wholly different parents, and I wouldn't want that.

[friendly]

Bethany: Thank you for taking care of everything, [Sister/Brother].

[rival]

Bethany: Some things, however… Goodbye, [Sister/Brother].

---

[circle Bethany]

Red Hawke: [This wasn't just about mages.] This was about finding a new life, not keeping secrets to his own "kind."

Bethany: Maybe. But I see so much of him in what I'm learning now. It makes me wonder what he truly wanted.

Bethany: It certainly makes me wonder what I want. I don't expect you to understand.

[friendly]

Bethany: Thank you for taking care of everything, [Sister/Brother].

[rival]

Bethany: I have to go, [Sister/Brother]. Give everyone my best.

---

[warden Bethany]

Red Hawke: [Still bitter? Grow up.] Look, I know it's been hard, but would you really rather be dead?

Bethany: You don't know. And if the Maker has mercy, you never will.

[any]

Bethany: I have to go, [Sister/Brother]. Give everyone my best.

(See Carver's section below for Leandra's reactions - the "friendly" version usually plays for Bethany. The "rival" version plays with the red Hawke dialogue selection, for rival Circle Beth or any Warden Beth.)

End of DLC - Legacy (Warden/Templar Carver)

[friendly]

Carver: I think… I think it'll be all right, you know? Not real soon, mind you.

Hawke: (Laughs.) I suppose it will. Not real soon.

Carver: Take care, [Sister/Brother].

[Leandra alive]

Leandra: You are not so different. Not beneath. I see so much of Malcolm in you both.

[Leandra dead]

Ghost of Leandra past: Malcolm would be happy you two aren't at each other's throats. Not all the time.

---

[rival]

Carver: So back to the way things are.

Hawke: Seems that way.

Carver: Right.

Carver: [Sister/Brother]... (Sighs). Never mind.

[Leandra alive]

Leandra: You two… fighting just makes it harder to see what we have. Malcolm risked so much. We shouldn't waste the chances he gave us.

[Leandra dead]

Ghost of Leandra past: You know Malcolm wouldn't want you two to fight. He sacrificed so we'd have a life free to choose, not always agree.

[watatsumiis]

OMG HIII <3 and Congratulations 🥳 you deserve each and every one of them & more! Remember to take care of yourself and stay hydrated. Please do this event at your pace love.

Can I please request a prompt with Waka sama (Ayato the Yashiro rascal :3) with #7? Thank you before hand! 🧸🤍

Once again, congratulations for your milestone! 🫶🏻

Thank you so much !! :D You make sure to take care and stay hydrated too !!

This ask and answer are a part of my 200 follower event, which is still open and can be found here!

Rambling under the cut ! Mentions of an Ayato who is a little more... flirty than canon might suggest (and maybe a smidge more unhinged--)

Content warnings: Dark!Ayato (as in like. kinda evil adjacent.), mentions of manipulation, power imbalances and the like. A bit of romantic x reader towards the end. I'd say this borders into yandere!Ayato -

Disclaimer: I do not condone any of the depicted behaviour in real life, this is a fictional piece of work in a fictional setting with fictional characters. If you believe you or someone you know is being abused or mistreated, please reach out to someone for help.

So, I've been sitting on this prompt a couple of days, trying to figure out how I might approach it. It brought a few pretty interesting concepts to mind - I've had a Villain!Ayato AU fluttering around for a while, nothing fleshed out, but now is as good a time as any, no? This song gave me some neat inspiration for it that I hadn't super considered until now.

Imagine, if you will, an AU where Ayato never fully grew out of his delinquent phase, an AU where he's a little more suggestible when he's younger, a little more easily corrupted.

An Ayato who is fully aware of his good looks and charm, and is more than willing to go the extra mile and use them to get his way. Someone who grew up so rich and spoiled so rotten that it seeped all the way down to his core.

On the surface, he's as diplomatic and polite as ever, but behind the curtain he's a different man completely - showering the object(s) of his fixation in love and gifts and making sure they'll never have to lift a finger for anything (well, until he tires of them). He's downright cruel to those he sees as being beneath him, or those who are no longer of any use to him.

Those lilac eyes hold a detached, cold kind of malice, a pure disregard for the wants and needs of anybody other than himself (and perhaps his family, at a push - though who knows what would happen if they were to dare stand in his way).

If you're unlucky enough to catch his eye, plenty of people would say you should be flattered (he's a man who's got very specific taste, after all), but it's hard to feel anything but overwhelmed at the sudden bombardment of gifts and affections Ayato showers upon you - through a third party, of course. He wouldn't be caught dead outside of the Estate, there are far too many out there who are plotting his demise.

It's not an easy task, shaking the Yashiro Commissioner off of your back, especially now rumours say he's climbing his way up the ranks, usurping the bylaws to dig his claws into the last remaining thing that is holding the already crumbling country of Inazuma together. It's downright scary to know that he's got his sights set on you, of all people, and nobody else seems to really think much of it, he's always been this way, after all - demanding and conniving - and what Kamisato Ayato wants, he gets.

Please don't repost, steal, copy or otherwise plagarise my writing! This includes posting translations to other sites (without credit+permission).

[cloudinterlude]

Do you have any headcanons about Steve, Tony, or Steve and Tony between AoU and CACW? Like, any ideas about Steve's relationships with Rhodey, Wanda, or Vision? Or how closely do you think Tony monitored/kept in touch with the Avengers 2.0 team while he was supposedly retired? Do you think Steve and Tony had many interactions during that time period?

This is actually such a good ask because I hardly ever...ponder about my headcanons? I usually don't fill in gaps with specific happenings because I'm much better at analysis of canon content, so this answer is going to be at least 50% brainstorming! Long post incoming! Also, sorry if this response takes forever to be posted...whoopsies.

All my SteveTony interpretations from that period of time are all depressing lol. I think it's the time they are simultaneously thinking about each other the most and growing apart the most (of course this is only rivaled by post-CACW SteveTony). It also sucks because I like to imagine that after CATWS, the Avengers are all living together for the first time up until AOU. But between AOU and CACW, Tony is wallowing and drowning in his guilt, fear and shame (which I believe is like, 90% the reason he takes the stances he does ) and Steve is literally a mess and a half. The thing is though, Steve is better at compartmentalizing and managing his horror show of a life (he literally has to be or he'd be dead, probably), so he is most likely coping better than Tony at this point. Just barely though. We'll touch on that later in the post if I remember.

Tony is in the trenches. Became depressed after he helped create a murder bot that decimated an already war torn country, piles of self-hatred stabbing his gut at every chance, no girlfriend, no team, no happiness, no JARVIS, no stability, no confidence, no dignity, no---You see the point. All he's thinking about is how the hell to fix all his mistakes that have come to light at once. I'm in the boat of thinking that CW literally could not have been prevented because of how deep in shit Tony is. I do however think CW could have ended up better if Tony and Steve were on better terms....or it would have been so, so much worse. I'd love to see someone write this (I might).

Anyways! I think Tony would have been doing a lot of pulling away from Steve during this time. I think Steve most likely reached out to Tony the few times he could, but he was met with an almost impenatrible wall that he didn't know how to scale. Steve is insanely busy at this time and in copious amounts of emotional turmoil - he only has spend - and seeing as Tony seems safe, I could see Steve redirecting his attention elsewhere after being rejected a few times too many and giving Tony space instead. I think it's pretty apparent that these two didn't interact much (or at least didn't have many deep conversations). I'm basing this off of how they reacted to each other in CW and how Steve didn't know Pepper and Tony broke up.

[This section is gonna be a especially clunky and worded oddly but WALK WITH ME PLEASE] I will say I like the idea of them having literally one (1) heart to heart within this time period. I think it would have had to be early on in order for it to not have a mentionable moment in CW. The conversation ultimately would have led to Tony and Steve understanding each other the way they do in CW. It would be about their "nightmares" in AOU. One thing that I find interesting actually, is how long it takes for Tony to...see Steve as a person? It's very apparent in Avengers 1, but in AOU as well. And it's actually my favorite thing when we see Tony try to push and poke at Steve to get a "human" or vulnerable reaction out of him. For example, the log scene. Where Tony eventually gets frustrated and implies that Steve didn't seem to torn up about whatever nightmare he got. This is 1) Tony fishing for vulnerability from Steve's coping mechanism of stoicism and 2) Tony is taking his anger out on Steve and it's acceptable enough to him because in his eyes, Steve is a stone fortress so it's not like it'll rankle him anyways. You see how this becomes a never-ending circle, yeah? Lol. Especially because Steve doesn't project his emotions in the same explosive way Tony does. To Tony, he seems self-assured, calm, almost too collected and this bothers Tony for reasons I can't elaborate on right now or I'll type too much. In short, it's a part of the Howard-Steve-Tony conflict. To Steve, he doesn't understand why Tony is being antagonistic towards him so he reacts the way he does instead of giving Tony what he wants.

Anyways, back to the conversation! I think they actually must reach a breakthrough with each other. Telling each other about their respective "visions" in AOU...Steve realizing how much responsibility and guilt Tony assigns himself, Tony realizing that Steve still feels displaced and isn't unaffected by the things that's happened to him....I even predict they talked about Howard a tiny bit. To me, in CW, I see a sense of understanding between them that simply isn't there in the previous movies. Yes, they are literally more divided than they have ever been, but I truly, and wholeheartedly believe that CW could have been so, so much worse. I think Steve could have been more pissed at Tony and Tony could have been more cold about everything if they didn't see each other as they are. They don't agree with each other, but they absolutely trust the intentions of the other. Tony straight up says (to Peter) that he knows that Steve is doing what he thinks is right. Steve almost folds and puts his trust in Tony during the signing scene and he wouldn't do that if he didn't have faith in Tony's intentions.

Now, all this said, I do not buy for a second that Tony was able to stay away and mind his "I'm retired" ass business during this time lol. He wasn't active, no, but did he show up to HQ a little more than he should have? Yes. Did he find ways to watch trainings and sparring in person (and on video)? Yes. Did he continue to build stuff for the Avengers (whether or not he actually gave his inventions for them to use)? Yes. Did he press Natasha for info surrounding the Avengers, HQ, Steve, ect? ABSOLUTELY. I think Tony and Natasha's closeness in CW is a direct product of Tony inquiring about everything he missed out on during his break and Natasha offering up all the info he wanted and more. She probably tried to convince him to come back once or twice.

Steve and Rhodes: Now, take my opinion on this dynamic with a grain of salt because Rhodey is a character that annoys me. Very surface level annoyance, but it's still there nonetheless. This isn't to say I think he's a bad character - he's actually one of the few MCU characters that is consistent and makes sense. Anyways, I never saw these two as close. I don't think they have the potential to become super close, nor do I think they are particularly interested in being close to each other. But there is a pretty solid level of mutual respect. I don't think Rhodey really...likes Steve for the same reasons Tony didn't like Steve. Mostly based off of misconceptions and reading Steve's disposition as egoism and coldness (I suspect that it's a little projection comes from seeing the Howard-Steve-Tony conflict from Tony growing up too but moving on). I think Steve is pretty neutral when it comes to Rhodey. He can sense the dislike, but it doesn't bother him because they aren't....close.

Steve and Vision: This is actually a really cute and heartwarming pair that I never thought about until now. I think Vision is fond of Steve. He became appreciative of him mostly through his own observations and through whatever Wanda tells him. I think there might have been times where Vision has seen Steve comfort Wanda and that could have pushed Vision to talk to Steve about his own concerns...maybe having to do with his personhood? I don't think they were close to each other, but I think that Vision definitely marked Steve in the "good" category of people he knows. On Steve's side, he's mostly bemused when it comes to Vision. It's confusion, apprehension and affection all at once. But maybe Vision also reminds him a teeny tiny bit of himself coming into the new century. Fumbling, unsure of new social cues, observing everything and attempting to mimic common behaviors. I'm sure Vision's behavior is endlessly endearing to Steve, but he doesn't know how to handle it all the time. They figure it out as they go. Very cute.

Steve and Wanda: I love them so much. Top 5 MCU dynamic that is never explored but is told through scraps and crumbs of dialogue that hint at the amount of time they've shared together and the amount of trust and care they've build between each other. Here's a take I haven't fully fleshed out yet: I think Steve's empathy and compassion for Wanda is literally endless. I think Wanda's faith and admiration for Steve is endless as well. I think these two are one of the most solid, locked in duos in the MCU. My evidence? Vibes. Just kidding, almost. But I think it's 1) their backgrounds, and 2) the progression of their relationship and 3) the types of characters they are. You know one of the main reasons Wanda trusts Steve? It's not only because he can see who she really is, it's not only because he empathizes with her pain - it's because he isn't afraid of her and her power. Instead, he's worried for her and how her lack of control over her abilities hurt her. He didn't take her in just so he could monitor and stop her from hurting other people - he took her in and continued to stick up for her because he genuinely, wholeheartedly cares. Wanda isn't one to be fooled by fake compassion. And she sees pure authenticity in Steve. Steve looks at Wanda and sees someone that was failed in the worse ways possible. Much like his own life, it's been hit after hit for Wanda - external circumstances that she couldn't control, so once she finally had a chance to take the reigns of her own destiny, she jumped at the opportunity. That line Steve says in AOU, "What kind of monster would let a German scientist experiment on them in order to protect their country?" "We're not at war, Captain." "They are." From the jump, he went into that fight understanding Wanda's motivations and immediately related them to his own experience and desperation. This empathy for someone who is supposed to be their enemy - someone who is actively coming for their necks. The same empathy that so many people are throwing out the window when it comes to Wanda and her story. I'm one of the whackjobs that fully believes that Wanda would have allowed Steve to help her through WandaVision and MoM AND Steve would have still forgiven and trusted her afterwards. If Wanda came to Steve devastated that they showed her Vision's corpse, he would have stood beside her without question and shut it down (we already know that Steve sees Vision as an actual person considering Infinity War). Steve is has been her advocate and support since she's joined them. And it's often shown in subtle ways. He also doesn't allow people to pick on Wanda - not on his watch. Wanda does the same (as much as she can) for Steve and follows his lead.

Okay, I realized that that turned more into an analysis without many headcanons lol....Okay, some Wanda and Steve headcanons. Steve draws Wanda a lot - always in bright and positive settings to express how he sees her. I think he also makes an effort to be as invested in her powers as she is - to assure that she knows she doesn't have to manage it herself. I could imagine it actual blows Wanda's mind when Steve drags her to practice her magic on him. On one hand she's terrified because she doesn't want to hurt him, on the other hand, she's filled with warmth because he believes in her and is backing it up by putting his own wellbeing on the line. One more...sometimes Wanda pranks Steve with her powers. It's both an example of her progress and her just being silly (but it really shows how comfortable and safe she feels with him). So cute.

Whew! I think I covered everything. I looooooooove detailed and specific questions/prompts like this. Especially when it involves character I'm directly invested in! Thank you so much <3 If you want more elaboration on anything or if I missed something, feel free to hit me up again! <3