#but i wanted to try writing a 'long' fic

[loveydovey-leviathan]

fights with sebek and talking it out

x gn!reader

warnings: curse words, like 1 small mention of self-hatred, probably ooc sebek :/

.

Saying that today was not your day would be more than just a major understatement. Everything, both small and big, seemed to be going wrong. You woke up late on top of your desk, having spent the entire night cramming for an important test you completely forgot about, not to mention Grimm didn’t even try to help, so the grade was entirely on you. And while you ran towards the school, you tripped and injured yourself, which also sent Grimm flying across the pavement. Luckily, he wasn’t hurt, but he did talk your ear off for it.

So you arrived to class injured, tired, and your uniform messed up. The professor made you stay back during lunch, which was to be expected, but the thought didn’t do anything to help your mood. And during the rest of the exam, the students stared as they laughed amongst themselves- the magicless prefect once again shows how much they don’t belong.

And so to add several shakes of salt to the already wide-open wound, you were also hungry- having skipped breakfast. At the very least, you packed Grim some extra tuna so he didn’t complain too much. But as you cleaned the class, you accidentally tipped over a beaker. The sound made a loud crash! in the empty schoolroom. It was safe to say your punishment got worse.

As you walked to your next class, you saw your friends for the first time today, and the first thing Ace does is make a comment about your appearance.

“Geez, what happened to you? You look like a mess-,”

“Not today, Ace,” you usually wouldn’t have minded, but it was only halfway through this excruciatingly long and stressful day and you wanted nothing more than for it to be over. To close your eyes and sleep for the next few days, to replenish your energy so you could have enough strength to handle the next pile of bullshit Crowley or someone else will inevitably put you through.

You expected him to keep pushing the topic, but your look may have convinced him to stop his jokes for once. Whatever it was, you were grateful that he read the signs and shut his mouth. And thankfully, so did the rest of the first-year gang. You could tell they were keeping themselves in line for you. Maybe you’d treat them with something when you had the time.

But all the peace your friends had been desperately trying to keep will inevitably come crashing down in the form of green hair, crocodile eyes and a loud mouth. And to make things even more unfortunate, it was the end of the day and the one time you were alone, Grim had gone scampering off to Scarabia (thank the Seven for the crappy cellphone Crowley gave you and the fact that Jamil woke up with a kind heart today). In other words, you were at your wit’s end.

“HUMAN!!”

You take in a deep breath before turning your head, meeting the eyes of Sebek, and before you could tell him that you’ve had a bad day and would really appreciate some peace and quiet-

“Young Master wishes to invite you over to Diasomnia for a group study session! ”

“Sorry Sebek,” you interrupt him with a sigh. You really don’t have the energy to study, let alone walk to another dorm and face the Diasomnia students, glaring at you for daring to even look at their Great Malleus.

“EXCUSE ME?! For someone as great as him to personally extend an invitation to-”

“God, do you ever shut up?!”

The words had tumbled out of your mouth before you could even properly register them in your head, and all that is left is silence as you watch one of your closest friends take in what you said. Your brain refuses to cooperate as you desperately try to get yourself to open your mouth and apologize.

“Sebek, I-”

By the time you manage to gain control of your body, you know it’s too late. You see the exact moment his face hardens, and all he gives you is a nod before he turns around and walks back to his dorm. 

Not knowing what to do, you just watch him leave. You figured you would give him some space before you tried apologizing, maybe the time alone wallowing in your own misery and self-hatred would be enough to convince the emotional part of your brain that you had suffered enough, that karma had already been dealt and you wouldn’t feel as bad for hurting him.

But try as you might, you couldn’t get the image of his eyes glistening for just a moment before he walked away out of your head.

…

An entire week had passed since the incident. You had tried approaching him to apologize numerous times, but you were 100% sure that he had been actively avoiding you. Your little gang had tried talking with him to help, but it seemed Sebek had been avoiding them as well. And during the few times they managed to catch up to him, as soon as they brought up your name, he would make some type of excuse and run off.

Sebek Zigvolt. Running away from confrontation.

At this rate, you had half a mind to walk up to his room after school so you could apologize right then and there, where he would have nowhere to go. You wouldn’t, of course, but you were definitely thinking about it.

But it seems like you didn’t have to go to such measures, because when you arrived at Ramshackle Dorm, you saw him standing on your porch.

You quietly tell Grim to go inside and have dinner without you, and for once, he complies with no fight. You watch him go through the little pet door you had installed in case he wanted to get in when you weren’t nearby. 

As soon as he was safely inside, you walk up to Sebek, who was staring at you with the hardened expression he’s worn on his face since your confrontation. Lilia must have talked to him and convinced him to confront you directly, for which you're grateful. Sebek looked like he had something to voice out, which was strange since you were the one at fault here.

A large and incredibly awkward silence filled the air as the both of you tried to think of what to say. But you’re the first one to speak.

“Umm… okay,” you take a slightly shaky breath. “I’m uhh- I’m sorry, Sebek,”

He says nothing, so you continue.

“Sorry I lashed out at you. You didn’t do anything wrong, I was just-” you let out a guilty sigh. “I was just really tired that day. It’s not an excuse, but- yeah. I’m sorry,”

It definitely wasn’t the best apology, but you hope that your sincerity came forth.

But still, no response. His eyes were looking at you as intensely as ever, and you don’t know what that means.

“Err.. Sebek?”

“...I’m… having difficulty finding the words to properly express myself,”

“O…kay. Umm..” you try to think of a way to help him, but your mind is blank. “Do you want to sit down?”

He stares at you for a moment before giving a curt nod. You look around and realise you don’t really have anywhere to sit, so you opt for the rickety stairs of the porch, and he soon follows.

The silence stretches on for a long while, but you have no problem waiting. Still, it wouldn’t do to just stare at him as he thinks of ‘how to properly express’ himself, so you distract yourself with your thoughts.

If you didn’t know him as well as you did, you’d think he wouldn’t have taken what you said to heart. He’s always had tough skin (literally and metaphorically), and a comment like that wouldn’t have even made a dent. But you’ve known each other for months now, and while there were still many things that remained a mystery to you when it came to Sebek, you knew he was more sensitive than he let on, especially when said person is dear to him.

Despite everything, your slightly fucked-up head couldn’t help but be glad that this situation practically proved that he saw you as someone to care about.

”Many people have told me that I am too loud and boisterous, but I never pay them any mind,” you quickly recollect your thoughts and focus all your attention on him, and from the tone of his voice and the way he wouldn’t turn to face you, it was evident that this was hard for him to admit.

“My sole duty is to protect the Young Master, so if cowardly people like them want to talk in whispers behind my back, so be it,”

Another pause, like he so desperately wanted to stop there, but nonetheless, he pushed forward.

“So imagine my surprise when I came to the realization that I was hurt by what you had said. I realized that it wasn’t because of your statement, but because you had said them,”

It was easy to say that Sebek had never been this honest with you before, and now he was looking at you with another expression you’d never seen on him, and you didn’t know how to describe it nor how it made you feel. But you could tell this was your time to speak.

“You know I didn’t mean what I said, right? I like it when you talk, I like watching you get passionate and excited, and I like how you’re not afraid to express how you feel. Even to me, even after I hurt you,”.

He’s shocked by that apparently, like he didn’t expect you to say anything even remotely close to what you just said.

And then he quickly turns his head away and coughs into his hand, and after a moment of- what you assume- is him trying to collect himself, he looks at you again, and you can tell from the look in his eyes that everything between the two of you had been resolved. Even if it would take some time to get back to normal with him.

“...Thank you, [ ___ ]”

[wikiangela]

wip wednesday

tagged by @tizniz @daffi-990 💖

just a tiny lil snippet of the bucktommy fic before I post it probably later tonight (it's basically almost done, and then I just need a title) ngl this whole fic turned out hornier than I expected but buck is just a baby bi who has his first boyfriend, and I am not immune to how hot tommy is okay 🙈 (buck and I have literally the exact same taste in men and women istg 🤣) i kinda wanted to turn it into smut but I want it posted before the episode and it turned out too long already haha

prev snippet

___

“When you’re ready.” Tommy says, his thumb tenderly brushing against where Buck’s birthmark is.

“Yeah.” Buck nods. “And when I am, I- Well, I bet you can teach me more stuff than just flying or Muay Thai.” he says half-jokingly, referencing the conversation right before their first kiss, when Buck didn’t even realize he was flirting until he thought back on it – which freaked him out, too, because how often did this happen before? Tommy just grins, all confident and charming, and leans in to press a soft but hungry kiss to Buck’s lips. Buck’s insides swirl and dance and make him feel all giddy and floaty. 

“Oh, I can teach you. I’m gonna.” he whispers, lightly pulling at Buck’s lip. Buck almost asks him to stay. Almost tries to bring Tommy closer, and thrust his hips up to make their clothed dicks collide again, wanting to feel that pressure again. He doesn’t, though. Which requires an impressive amount of self-control, if he says so himself.

___

no pressure tags: @elvensorceress @thebravebitch @shortsighted-owl @eddiebabygirldiaz @watchyourbuck @eowon @loserdiaz @evanbegins @ladydorian05 @wildlife4life @diazpatcher @lover-of-mine @monsterrae1 @thewolvesof1998 @neverevan @weewootruck @loveyouanyway @spagheddiediaz @rainbow-nerdss @epicbuddieficrecs @pirrusstuff @spotsandsocks @alliaskisthepossibilityoflove @nmcggg @rogerzsteven @giddyupbuck @sunshinediaz @honestlydarkprincess @underwater-ninja-13 @exhuastedpigeon @911-on-abc @jesuisici33 @steadfastsaturnsrings @theotherbuckley @buddieswhvre @dangerpronebuddie @diazsdimples @fortheloveofbuddie @hoodie-buck @your-catfish-friend @hippolotamus @bidisasterbuckdiaz

[bipanicoverthegravessiblings]

How about Ashley x Emo Fem Reader? Like gothic with uhh emotic? Or something like that. Like they meet when they been in high school. And they live in Y/N's house that she get from her parents when they passed

If you had any questions, ask me

Oooohhhh- okay okay!

Ashley Graves x Emo Fem!Reader

Social outcast, you generally considered yourself

Not just you, your peers as well had called you that- or…crude variations of it

Point is, no one in school really liked you

You’ve overheard their gossip- all the same shit really

“I bet she lights cats on fire!” “Look at her sleeves, I bet she cuts herself.” “She’s gonna blow up the school I swear”

They couldn’t even bother to be creative with their assumptions about you- a lot of the same depressed demon stuff

….and you are depressed- but that’s besides the point!

You never really connected with any of your peers..

…well- except one..

Lunchtime was quite possibly the worst part of your day. It was a war zone. In the classrooms you had teachers to lessen the blows your classmates would throw at you, both metaphorically and physically, here the only solace of a savior were the underpaid lunch ladies who were occupied handing out food to students.

You hugged the wall as you carefully watched your peers, they all seemed fairly occupied in their own conversations- not even noticing you. You liked it when they forgot your existence. Loneliness beat cruelty.

There was a table you always sat at, tucked into the corner of the lunchroom- and for good reasons. The surface was littered with graffiti of swears, slurs, those cool S’s, and various crude doodles left by your peers. Not only that, but the table was very wobbly, so badly you usually have to use two textbooks to prop it up. The bottom was covered in dried out, chewed gum- the entire thing was just a sitting “DO NOT COME HERE” sign.

And it was perfect!

No one ever sat there due to how shitty it was, you think the students and faculty didn’t even bother to go near it. They either think it’s cursed, or forgot about it. Or both. Maybe both. But today someone had actually got there before you did.

A disgruntled girl with messy black hair poked at the mystery meat on her lunch tray. Poked isn’t the right word- more like viciously stabbed it repeatedly. Her nose scrunched in frustration, likely not directed towards the so-called food, but it was the only thing she had to vent her frustrations on to. She hadn’t noticed you.

You stood there a little awkwardly, not wanting to startle her on accident, so instead you spoke up meekly.

“Uhm…hi.” You smiled a little, trying to harmless. She didn’t look like your average bullies, but you can never be too careful.

She looked up at you with her pink eyes- her gaze was sharp, and you instinctively tensed in preparation for some insult to be thrown. She gave you a once over before returning to her tray, “…hey.”

“Can I…sit here?” It was a dumb question. Technically this table had been your seat, and this girl just showed up out of nowhere- but, oh well.

She gave a frustrated sigh, “God- did Andy put you up to this?” She asked rather accusatory, pointing her fork at you.

You opened your mouth to reply before she interrupted you, “Look how many times do I have to tell you hussies, you’re just wasting your time! He’s not going to fuck you if you’re nice to me so just—“

“Who’s Andy?”

The question you asked sounded genuine….cause it was. Really, you had no idea who this ‘Andy’ guy was. The girl lowered her fork, eyeing you wearily before she decided that you weren’t lying. She turned her head and muttered,

“….you can sit.”

And so you did. The two of you ate in relative silence. Well- you ate. Your new lunch friend more-so stabbed at her food then ate it. You swallowed down the lump of unidentifiable cafeteria meat and gave her a friendly smile. The silence was deafening and you’d never had anyone to eat with so maybe…maybe this could be nice for a change..

“I’m Y/N.” You introduced yourself.

The girl glanced up at you before returning to her tray, “…Ashley..”

“I’ve never seen you at this table much.” your hands patted the surface nervously.

“Normally I sit with my brother and so-called friend,” her words dripped with malice, “But my stupid brother had to go study for some history test! And my ‘friend’ conveniently didn’t save me a seat…” she stuck her fork into the biggest chunk of her food and muttered, “Fucking bitch…”

“That’s a bit harsh..” you mumbled, causing Ashley to perk up and glare at you.

She practically climbed over the table and held her fork out towards you, making your hands instinctively raise in surrender, “She is a bitch! A doe-eyed hussie who thinks she’s soooooo innocent when she sucks just as much as everyone else!”

“I meant it was harsh that she wouldn’t let you sit with her,” your eyes were fixated on the fork, kind of worried Ashley would drive it into your neck, “I…should’ve been more specific. Sorry.”

Ashley’s pink eyes widened a little, she almost seemed- shocked someone took her side. Slowly, she clambered back to her seat and went quiet. You lowered your hands back into your lap and stared at her. Ashley pushed her tray and folded her arms overtop the table.

“….thanks.” She mumbled.

After that, you saw Ashley a lot more

It wasn’t every day, maybe once a week or two she would show up at your hidden table to eat

Slowly, she came out of that shell and actually initiated conversations

Well- conversations were a stretch. It was more like her venting about her frustrating day while you nodded along and ate.

Eventually, she liked you enough to stop you in the halls and walk with you

Usually her brother, Andrew you had come to learn his actual name, walked with her and she made a show to cling on to your arm

It never failed to make the heat rush to your face

Ashley was cute. Very cute. And had a general unhinged vibe that just made her all the more alluring

So it didn’t surprise you that you’d catch feelings for your new friend

No- what surprised you was when Ashley actually liked you back

You paused, silence hanging in the air as Ashley stared at you expectingly. Her foot tapped with impatience as she awaited what you were going to say.

“Well?”

You didn’t know what to say, the only time anyone has asked you out was as a prank. This was different. The question wasn’t coming from some bully barely able to keep their giggles in, this was coming from your friend. Someone you trusted. Someone who wouldn’t hurt you…..at least you think. She did threaten you with a fork.

Ashley’s growing impatience let you know just how slack jawed you were, “Look- if you’re going to be weird about this then just…forget I said anything.” She crossed her arms, turning away from you in a huff.

That was when you came out of your stupor, trying to salvage this, “No! No! It’s okay- really! I’m just….shocked that you asked me out.” You stammered with your explanation, “I didn’t even think you liked girls..”

“Me neither.” She mumbled, the faintest starts of a blush painting her cheeks. It was cute. She was cute.

Your face softened as you placed a hand on her shoulder, “….I’d love to.”

From there you two were dating

Had it only put more unwanted attention on you? Yes, but you wouldn’t have it any other way

You were happy, so fuck what those jerks had to say

Things were good, and after high school the both of you fucked off to another town

With Andrew in college, it’s not like Ashley wanted to stick around her shitty homelife

And you- honestly had no connections aside from your parents, and moving out was expected

So, it was you and Ashley. Outcast for outcast

[kii0mi]

Ok so, hear me out, what if Danny thinks he and clockwork have a mentor and mentee relationship, almost like a family dynamic even. He gets to sleep on a couch on clockworks tower, hang around, and clockwork might sometimes even help him.

He’s happy, it’s everything he didn’t have with the Fentons, but, what if, clockwork only did it to avoid a bad timeline? He didn’t actually care about Danny, could care less what happened to him as long as it didn’t affect the timeline, and Danny discovers it for the first time when clockwork is very willing, and not at all affected, to end his life if he doesn’t complete a certain task for a “better timeline”

It’s not even a definite will, it’s just a slight chance of the timeline going wrong, and then Danny truly sees how little their relationship means to clockwork. It all crumbles around him as he realizes that the only “healthy” relationship he thought he had was build on straight up lies, he grieves for the mentor he apparently never even had on the first place.

Danny finishes the mission, and as clockwork goes to Pat him in the head for a good job so similar to a dog, a loyal pet to just follow orders in exchange for the bare minimum of affection and care, Danny avoids his hand and just flies away, core empty, void of any meaningful relationship, alone

He stops visiting clockwork altogether, and clockwork doesn’t visit either, barely keeping an eye on the boy to make sure he doesn’t step out of line, and if they capture and experiment on the kid? It’s not his problem as long as the timeline turns out alright

[druidonity2]

You stumble across a sha with a unique appearance. It looks like it's struggling to keep it's original form. What do you do?

[daffi-990]

Fuck it Friday

Tagged by @diazsdimples and @tizniz. Thank you lovelies for the tag! Everyone be sure to check out what they shared okay?!

Today I present to you some tsunami action from Rival Firefighters 🚒. I finished all of the tsunami stuff for Buck’s chapter today which I am happy about … I’m just not sure how I feel about what I wrote 😬. I found the tsunami difficult to write and I’m very nervous and slightly overwhelmed at revisiting it again in the next chapter but in Eddie’s POV. It’s definitely going to be a challenge, but I want to improve and stretch myself as a writer which means challenging myself haha.

Prev snippet from this au can be found here

“I can’t hold on!” Chris cries out before he’s losing his grip and slipping under the water.

Heart hammering in his chest Buck waits for a moment before diving into the rapids, swimming with all his might. If he timed it right he should intercept Chris.

Fuck he hopes he timed it right.

Debris clouds the water making it hard to see but not impossible, and coming straight towards him is Chris. Buck reaches out and grabs onto Chris, pulling him towards him.

I’ve got him, I’ve got him, I’ve got him.

They break through the surface, both sucking in deep lungfuls of air as they hold tightly to each other, Buck cradling the back of Chris’s head as he repeats I’ve got you over and over again, as much a comfort for himself as it is for Chris.

With Chris now in his arms, Buck begins swimming in search of safety where they can rest and wait for help, ideally somewhere out of the water.

He doesn’t have to search far, for less than a mile ahead Buck spots a fire engine, the red of the roof standing out among the ocean of blue and white surrounding them, a bright beacon of hope. Buck swims towards the engine and pushes Chris up onto the roof as quickly as he can. He begins to pull himself up, arms shaking from exertion but he doesn’t stop, keeps pulling up and up until his torso is over the edge and he’s able to crawl into the center, collapsing beside Chris.

We’re safe.

We’re alive.

We’re alive.

No pressure tagging: @wildlife4life @hippolotamus @spotsandsocks @steadfastsaturnsrings @wikiangela @watchyourbuck @athenagranted @alliaskisthepossibilityoflove @malewifediaz @spagheddiediaz @lover-of-mine @ladydorian05 @loserdiaz @exhuastedpigeon @elvensorceress @eddiebabygirldiaz @evanbegins @rainbow-nerdss @rewritetheending @thewolvesof1998 @try-set-me-on-fire @theotherbuckley @princessfbi @shitouttabuck @devirnis @disasterbuckdiaz @fiona-fififi @fortheloveofbuddie @giddyupbuck @hoodie-buck @homerforsure @honestlydarkprincess @jeeyuns @puppyboybuckley @jesuisici33 @captain-hen @bekkachaos @nmcggg @monsterrae1 @missmagooglie @epicbuddieficrecs and anyone else who has something they want to share -> consider this your official tag 😉

[prince-liest]

more self-indulgent jgy abo headcanons

I read a fic so long ago that I no longer remember the fandom nor characters involved, but the thing about it that really stuck in my mind was that it was an abo-verse fic that used the concept that omegas have an ingrained biological need for physical (including platonic) affection, to the point where “touch-starvation” was a medical diagnosis

this is obviously extremely up my alley for ALL my blorbos, but consider jin guangyao in particular:

unlike the usual ‘omega pretending to be a beta’ trope, I think that once he is established at jinlintai, he would not really try to let people assume that he’s a beta. being an omega leads people not only into underestimating him, but also into offering him a certain degree of safety in providing a veil of stereotype-associated demureness, placidity, etc. it is more to his benefit for people to see him as a polite young man, perhaps even one who, yes, is a war hero - but people can’t quite imagine what kinds of things he must have done for that. surely nothing too bad.

but at the same time, this is the character who couldn't even serve tea to people as nie mingjue’s deputy without people making a show of wiping off their fingers after touching the cups. people know he is an omega, people judge him for being an omega on top of all the other things he is already judged for, but I suspect that most of the relevant and appropriate people in jinlintai avoid touching him unless absolutely necessary. in a world where casual contact is thoroughly commonplace just due to the socialities set up by their biology, jin guangyao has a personal space bubble of like 2-3 feet because he's the dirty son of a prostitute.

he walks through the halls, ostensibly the second young master of the tower, and feels like he is drowning in the physical manifestation of loneliness.

who does he have left? family? jin zixuan is not close to him, and frankly is likely an alpha raised by alphas to whom it would not even occur to that such needs need to be minded. jin guangshan certainly is aware, but is using it as leverage, allowing and denying contact as he see fits to manipulate jin guangyao the same way he does with his fatherly affection. there are his sworn brothers, but his relationship with nie mingjue is fraught: certainly da-ge wouldn’t withhold contact as punishment or leverage, but that doesn’t mean he wants to touch jin guangyao anymore, nor does he really understand how the necessity of it feels when he grew up with nie huaisang, an omega who has never been shy about taking whatever affection he wants. and er-ge... he just isn’t around enough.

lan xichen is still the best option, and by the time they have the opportunities to see each other, jin guangyao is pressing nails into his palms to stop from just plastering himself up against lan xichen’s side, which surely would be humiliating for both of them. but still, he’s so aware of it any time they’re in the same room, meting out as many small touches as he can get away with without embarrassing himself. lan xichen slips his fingers over jin guangyao’s wrists as he pulls him up from a bow, intending warm affection. jin guangyao doesn’t want to let him know that it feels like being allowed to gasp for a single breath of air before his head is shoved back underwater.

(with nie mingjue, it is worse. da-ge is just as aware as jin guangyao is when they touch, but for all the worst reasons.)

it is the strangest blessing whenever jin guangyao sees nie huaisang. it’s embarrassing, a little - the knowledge that nie huaisang understands, unlike most people in jin guangyao’s life. but nie huaisang takes that embarrassment onto his own self willingly, never hesitating before making a fool of himself in the way that only a terminally younger brother can, and simply flinging himself into his san-ge’s arms. it’s nostalgic, too: nie mingjue isn’t quite so aware of how important touch is with how proactive nie huaisang can be, and so during his days as deputy, it was often nie huaisang who gave meng yao what he could not ask for.

the cultivators at jinlintai look down on him just as the ones in the unclean realm did, but now there is no willing young master to soothe away the tangible, physical ache of it. more often than not, jin guangyao tucks his hands into his sleeves to hide the way his fingertips shake.

anyway this is my petition for jiang yanli to take two looks at this situation and promptly wrinkle her brows just the slightest amount, expressing quiet concern to jin zixuan that it’s strange how she doesn’t see anybody touch his half-brother very much, does she? and jin zixuan is a little confused, a little embarrassed, a little off-balance - he doesn’t feel close enough to jin guangyao to be that casual, but he’s an alpha, he doesn’t get it until jiang yanli explains to him, with a beta’s patience, the value of family bonds to an omega as well as jin zixuan’s responsibility as a brother (older brother? younger? his father claims older, but there’s no way to truly know - ), and isn’t it wonderful, having a little brother?

and then someone pats jin guangyao over the head until he’s feeling a little less strung-thin and out of options, he realizes he has to keep jin zixuan and jiang yanli alive lest he actually lose his mind (sympathy for da-ge? oh no...), and etc etc things end happily ever after, the end, QED.

[chrollohearttags]

and if I said I wanted to leave—🧍🏾‍♀️

[lunarharp]

into the deep end - 30k T orufrey fic, focusing on memory trauma, disability, and romance.

the sweet oblivion of the victim, the poisoned freedom of the other.

for one moment - it had felt like two parts returned - the needed reunion of two disparate halves. no more secrets, no more pain.

the moment you get to give back what you never wanted to take. that moment, under the night-blooming flowers, when they had both let out the same single broken sigh of relief.

but they were never whole to begin with, were they?

qifrey swore he wouldn't say 'sorry' to this man any more if he could help it - sorry is cheap now. he didn't want to be in a position ever again where you only have 'sorry' left. so he just looks down into the threads of his blanket, strains his eye until it hurts, feeling his insides - his throat, heart and head - burn with pain. he expects more, but olly says nothing.

olly says nothing.

[tacogoats]

Thinking about a Durge who has rejected Bhaal, and whatever person they used to be, but still secretly longs for their lost memories. A Durge that, despite the answers the man could give them, would never re-ignite that strange passion they were shown they once had for Gortash. A Durge that has, for all purposes to the others in their party, moved on. A Durge that, six months after that day atop the Netherbrain, at a party celebrating their new life, receives a strange letter with an even stranger gadget hidden inside.

The meeting at the inauguration was a strange one. Despite Gortash's very obvious elation at seeing what he'd called his 'dearest friend', the man had no hesitation very proudly detailing the Dark Urge's grand scheme; their grand design for the world to be.

In front of all their friends and 'new' lover, of course.

They were furious, and rightly so. Gortash must have known what he was doing. To isolate them, to bring them back to him. The person who accepted them for all they were, all they are, and all they could be - together.

It wasn't enough to win the Dark Urge back to him, and although they'd tentatively teamed up in the end - he had died. Not by the Urge's hand, but in some ways, his own. The group had left Gortash's body within the Prism, and simply moved on. There were bigger problems, and no one really was sad to see him go. Right?

The Urge remembers a letter found in Moonrise Towers. Gortash liked gadgets, according to Ketheric. Evidence was abundant enough with the Steel Watchers, among other things. The item is strangely shaped, entirely too small, and with a simple touch, comes to life.

It reminds them of the strange picture they had seen at the Iron Throne. Gortash's visage shone through a glass, moving, talking - warning them to leave. Answering them, praising them for listening.

What a strange contraption, they'd thought all those months ago.

And then, now, there he was again. A picture, in their hand. A moving picture. Speaking with his voice, wearing his weary face - so, so weary - but not the same as before.

This had passed already. The voice did not answer them this time. It was simply impossible - the man was dead, but not quite gone in this moment.

He speaks of the inauguration like it had just happened. His joy at seeing his favourite 'assassin' again, which he says with a sad smile and a moment of silence. A heavy sigh follows, rubbing at his eyes - which they can see are so much darker than they last remember.

He is tired.

Gortash speaks of their time together, before Orin - and how Orin torments him day and night now that they had both confirmed the Urge's return. She appears with their face, taunting him some days. Other days she sends assassins that wear the same, and he simply cannot let his guard down anymore. But he knew it was them that day.

They can see the exhaustion that pulls down his features, makes his words heavier. This is not the Archduke speaking to him in this moment - it is a tired, broken down man that has just seen a ghost.

Yet they cling to every word anyway, because even though this is a broken down man who is terrified of the ghost - the man still hopes the ghost will remember him, too.

They don't. But he doesn't know that, not this little picture of him, anyway.

The picture says that if they are seeing this recording, it means he is already dead - and although he had planned to sway them back to his side, he may not have been given the chance, and refuses to allow the opportunity to share what the two of them once had slip away.

He would gift unto them the memories that he could, even beyond death. The bloody ones, the happy ones, the painful ones.

And he talks, he smiles, he even cries.

And so do they.

[qrjung]

So like, Amanda is clearly supposed to be important to Connor because she's got that nice shiny relationship stats, but I wish she was actually important to Connor. I want their relationship to mean something. The Betrayed stats when he deviates didn't mean too much to me but I would like it to be.

What I'm saying is I wish they'd given his relationship with Amanda as much attention and weight as they did with Hank. Sure, it's got red flags everywhere and it's not healthy but the whole Hank thing has red flags too so that's not an excuse. I want the decision to deviate to be harder for the player, aight? And maybe this is one way to do it.

[non-un-topo]

Sometimes I procrastinate writing a fic by “storyboarding” it 😅

[oetscop]

this is kinda old and i almost didnt post it. i kinda gave up on making a full rainer ref like i did with daniel soooo take this ^}^

this is after 1997 and before 2000 when he went missing for good.

[paintedvanilla]

fight club fanfic rec list <3

hiiiii. this is gonna go in ascending order of rating (beginning with general ending with unrated) and each fic will be marked accordingly. 

I made this at my silly little desk job. getting paid to recommend fight club fanfic. 

*markers denote my absolute favs, i would not be able to live or breathe without them.

here they are:

Sit. Stay. by redvineshark (Rated G) — this fic is sooo fucking cute it has some great moments with great dialogue between tyler and the narrator and it makes me chuckle. a very fun light read. 

Indulgence by anorchidisnotaflower (Rated T) — this fic is very quick and also very sweet I think it’s a very fun version of their first kiss and it makes me mild to severely ill on any given day (affectionate)

*I am Joe's "it's complicated" status by DoubleMastectomy (Rated T) — this fic!! this fic is sooo important to me this fic opened my third eye this fic was giving me revelations. I am deeply obsessed with the dynamic introduced in this fic and the way tyler and the narrator and marla intersect oh it made me absolutely crazy. and the ending scene with the bus ride made me lose my entire mind. 

A Reversal and Continuum by anorchidisnotaflower (Rated T) — these fics are the first two in a series, I enjoyed them so so much they do a great job at exploring tyler and the narrator’s dynamic post canon. the ending of continuum makes me kick my legs and giggle it’s so sweet ehehe. 

*Leash Called Love by edsvard (Rated T) — this fic!! This fic is soo!! I’m absolutely obsessed with the dynamic between marla and the narrator in this one, their bickering back and forth that just ends up dissolving into a normal conversation half the time is so so good. another fantastic getting together fic for the narrator and tyler. eek!!

In the Backseat of an Impala by kingdomcomeundone (Rated T) — eee this fic is quite short but it’s sooo sweet I love fics that manage to capture a bit of fluff that still feels in character for them, and I think that’s done excellently here <3 

Tease by jayyxx (Rated T) — this one is!! I loooove this fic i adore it. something something submissive tyler durden oh it has a chokehold on me i have visions of this fic while i’m trying to fall asleep at night. 

*Just To Be Real by seven2seventy (Rated T) — THIS FIC!! this is one of my absolute favorites!! this fic makes me literally lose my mind it’s one of the only fics I’ve read from tyler’s pov that gets it so so right, it’s amazing it’s incredible it had me fathoming things i had never thought to fathom. I was talking about how much i liked this fic at manar’s graduation ceremony i was spreading the gospel out loud and in person. a masterpiece tbh. 

your heart is a muscle the size of your fist by citrus_boots (Rated M) — this fic is another fun, quick one that explores the dynamic between tyler and the narrator post canon. I love reading these, they’re always so varied even though they often follow a lot of the same points, and this one does it spectacularly. 

Trip My Wire by edsvard (Rated M) — this fic is sooo fun i think it’s a really interesting getting together moment for tyler and the narrator. I’m shocked i haven’t seen more fics that incorporate breathplay and the narrator’s tie. this fic had me shaking in my boots. 

Sit-ups by catsinagraveyard (Rated M) — just another sweet, short one. exactly what it says on the tin. I love these characters so much (i am actively slipping into insanity).

*Bathtub Mermaid by load_star (Rated M) — THIS FIC WAS WRITTEN BY MY LOVELY FRIEND MANAR who i dedicate all my fics to because they’re the one who got me into fight club in the first place. I love this fic so much it makes me crazy and insane and so so happy. mandatory reading. 

So, When Do I Get My Pony? by GlitteryV (Rated E) — this is a classic, this is one of the very first fics manar sent me, directly responsible for the spores getting to me. just a fun, smutty read. 

*A Handshake of Carbon Monoxide by Weeklyoatmeal (Rated E) — THIS FIC!!! I am absolutely obsessed with this fic. I've been thinking about it all week!! It’s a great long one, one single chapter, absolutely phenomenal. literally had me shaking in my boots during my first read through, I really enjoyed this version of tyler and the narrator getting together and the ending scene is. hehe well it’s very good. 

*too much, too late by TheWholeEatingBreadThing (Rated E) — do not let the incomplete label on this one frighten you off the chapter that is posted stands alone!! please this is one of my absolute favorites!! the dynamic is something i never really would have considered, but it’s written so well i enjoy it so much!! I think about the line “I'm ovulating right now and I'd rather have your kid than his” literally every day, no exaggeration. 

Familiar Faces by Chommi (Rated E) — okay this one is actually incomplete, but I’m kind of obsessed with the premise of it?? everything posted so far is excellent and I love it so much, please if you read it leave a comment!! (and not just a “please update” comment, let the author know what you enjoyed about it!!) I’ve not seen a concept like this before and I find it very cool and fun. 

kerosene dream by ictus (Rated E) — this is another classic. when manar and i started exchanging fics, this was the first one i rebounded back at them. it’s excellent. well written, good characterization, just an overall great read. 

*recidivism (nouveau) by snuffbby (Rated E) — this. fic. oh GOD this fic. my ao3 history says i’ve visited this fic 38 times since my first read in march and i fucking believe it. this is my absolute favorite fight club fic HANDS DOWN. nothing beats this fic. literally the best getting together fic I’ve read about tyler and the narrator, incredible characterization, i love the way both of them are written, the narrators… narration, it’s SO SO GOOD. their dynamic as a couple makes me INSANE. it's got a great pace, not entierly a slow burn, more like a medium burn, and i reread the chapters where they finally get together so often. this fic made me fathom things i didn’t think i ever would, this fic influences everything i’ve written about tyler and the narrator, it opened my third eye in terms of how the two of them can fit together in a relationship. they make me crazy. please read this. it’s the best. 

Exchanging Body Heat In The Passenger Seat by chemicalburntjack (Rated E) — another absolute classic. I don’t have much to say about this one other than it’s incredibly good, I love the dynamic they’ve got going on, feels very in character for the narrator and for tyler. another excellent getting together fic, they really would go 0 to 100 like this. 

*King of the Wild Things by seven2seventy (Unrated) — another one of my absolute favorites of all time! I am OBSESSED with the religious imagery in this one, the way the narrator worships tyler ugh it makes me literally go crazy. this is another must read for me. 

thanks for checking them out. if you find a fic off this list that you enjoy, make sure to leave a comment on said fic letting the author know what you enjoyed!! <3

also not to self promote but if you haven't, feel free to check out my own fight club fics. ehehe.

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

strangling my past self How Did You Write Reasonably Sized Fics So Easily

[lit-in-thy-heart]

been trying out a new writing technique recently and it's called chilling tf out and reminding myself that fic is written for fun.