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piningpercussionist · 10 months

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Howdy, Pine! Can we get three headcanons for all your favorite Scott Pilgrim characters? :-)

Oh absolutely!!!! Lemme think for a minute...

((FUTURE FUTURE ME: I LITERALLY JUST PROCESSED YOU SAID THREE HEADCANONS IM SO SORRY--- YOU WILL UNDERSTAND 😭))

Okay I had a whole thing here, but we're gonna try this again but slightly more Hinged-- forcing myself to format so things don't get out of hand again. I will HAPPILY elaborate, though!!

((Whoop this is future me. This post is going to be so long if I dont do this, so I'm going to put this all under the cut! I'll try to remember to come back up here with the characters I talk about- alternative, should I not do that, maybe check the tags! I'll try to only tag the people I'm directly talking about))

KIM PINE

sexuality: very likely canonically Bi, I am a very big fan of her being a comp. het. lesbian, though (I get this both from my read of the comics/her character and just me Injecting myself into my favorite characters ✌️)

pronouns: she/her usually, but I think she'd be very open and vibe with they/them (me injecting myself again, but also she's just chill like that. I think she prefers if strangers use they/them for her, and her friends or partners use she/her. I'm undecided if she prefers her partners call her their girlfriend or their partner, though.)

Characters I think she has feelings for: RAMONA FLOWERS, Lisa Miller, (MAYBE Scott Pilgrim, still)

Elaboration on that:

I honestly think I can just. Point at some comic panels for Ramona. And the goat thing again. They make me Unhinged that's how canon that is.

Lisa!!! My beloved!!! I think she had a tiny crush on her in high school and had no idea that it was a crush until way later in life- maybe shortly after seeing her again, actually. But like. She's so obviously smiley and happy when she's around, I really can't help but read it that way! She, at the very least, gets an extreme mood boost in her presence, so she really likes having her around.

Scott Pilgrim.... *scrubbing at my face* okay. Okay. So, I have a couple different reads on her feelings for Scott, they're kind of complicated for me to dismantle. Especially since I haven't started my reread of book 6 (I've been giving my thumbs a break, which I am currently prolonging but I have been DYING for someone to ask me to talk about this series.) I'm going to go with my more canon read and leave it at that I think, because it's already becoming this text wall.

Scott was really important to her, I think. She's this aloof, sullen, bitchy girl and she knows it- and then this dorky idiot walks into her life and they really hit it off! They date, they have really sweet, private moments together- it's everything to her. It's someone loving her in spite of the hard shell she initially puts out, and managing to reach her soft, easily bruised heart in ways no one had before. But then he left so abruptly, and that heart was crushed under the weight of her own ribcage. I think she carried that hurt with her every day from that point- I don't imagine her having a particularly roaring love life after that. I think she kept that hurt bottled, and it made any relationships she DID attempt fall apart. It's a wound she's been nursing for way, way too long, and I think she knows that- that's why she wants so badly to forget about it. But then she goes to Toronto and runs into Scott again at the lowest point in his life, and she can't get herself to step away, because this is the only person who ever claimed to love her in a way she felt. I think her decision to stay was sort of... detrimental to her moving on. If she'd detatched herself and stepped back, maybe she could have moved on eventually- she could have worked on herself, or maybe lucked out and found someone who could get through those walls without a sledgehammer, and she would have been better for it. But that's not what happens. She stayed, and I think the longer she stayed the harder it became to keep herself completely shielding from him, because he's still that same goofy guy at his core- he's just a bit worse than she remembered him being. But damn near everything he does throughout the comics just continues to crush her until she HAS to leave- he can apologize, and she can accept it for the version of him she loved, but he's not enough to convince her to stay anymore. I'm going to cut my canon analysis there until I reread their next scene, rather than just continuing incase my thoughts have slightly changed, but like... man... they hurt me in a very unique way. If it was anyone other than Scott, it'd be tragic. (Maybe it still is, maybe that's the Kim Bitterness talking)

For a brief touch on my less canon take, with Kim being a lesbian: I think Scott would have been better placed in her life as a best friend than a partner, but when you're young, and honestly even when you're not all that young, emotional distinction like that can be so, so confusing. So all of the hurt remains very genuine, because she does love him, just not the way she thought she did.

((Because I do love the trans!fem Scott HC as well, I will say. I feel like it would be really, really funny for Kim to realize she's into women and be like "wow sure dodged round two of the Scott Pilgrim bullet" and then one day Scott shows up having started her transition and is like "Oh hey Kimmy!! I'm a lesbian AND a girl, like you now!!!" And Kim just. Crushes her drink or something in her hand like "oh no... oh no she's attractive again... FUCK FUCK FUCK." Obviously a lot more nuanced than that, though. I should probably clarify that I started answering this ask almost IMMEDIATELY after waking up and also BEFORE I've taken more pain meds. If this post has been or starts to become very scattered again, that's why lol.))

Bonus consideration: Hollie. I can dig her having a crush on Hollie, but I feel like it faded a little living with her, and then shattered entirely after the Jason Kim situation. Even an overwhelming attraction to women ain't savin that one, chief. That's just too severe a betrayal.

The Knives Situation: Oh Boy. So in the original answer for this I had a whole thing done up, lemme try to condense it. Basically, I think Kim woke up the next morning HORRIFIED by what she'd done. Like, dry heaving in the bathroom horrified. And this likely really hurt Knives's feelings, should she see! Which Kim would feel horrible about. I'm undecided on if she just runs from the situation before Knives can wake up, or if they have a sort of agrument/one-sided rant on Kim's part afterward where she just really tries to hammer home for Knives how not okay it was for them to do that- for HER to do that, given their ages and inherent power imbalance. In the event that this discussion happens, Knives absorbed none of it, and probably leaves that conversation a little wounded. I think it would proceed to play back in her mind when she and Stephen are talking at one of Julie's parties later on, though, and she'd probably approach Kim after that to thank her for being a reasonable adult about that, unlike how some of her friends had been. Once that understanding is reached, I think they could be good friends, although Kim probably teases her for how she started to dress like her after they first met.

Silly little things: If anyone's familiar with Night in the Woods, do you know the part where Mae's like "that's not drums... that's a computer..."? I feel like that has Kim energy. To me.

Also I think Kim sucks at Rockband- I know that releases like, way afterward or something so far as comic timeline goes, but bare with me, okay? It's my silly little headcanons! Anyway, she'd suck really, really bad on the drums, since so far as I can recall, they don't REALLY correspond with the music. If her friends force her to play, she demands either the mic or the bass, because "fuck you Scott, you try playing their stupid fucking drums." He proceeds to play flawlessly, much to her chagrin. She fairs better on the bass, but only a bit better than the drums, since her fingers aren't quite used to the movements.

Kim didn't think she liked cats for a while, mostly because she was only ever around them fleetingly, and generally in the homes of people who should have been cleaning their litter boxes more regularly. After hanging around Ramona's house more, though, she discovers she really love them! She feels a sort of kinship watching how they actually behave, and I think Gideon ends up warming to Kim very quickly, which probably helps with the very quick turnaround on her opinion. I think it'd be funny if sometimes, when Kim's over, Scott will try to beckon Gideon over to him for cuddles or affection, and the cat will just. Stare at him entirely unimpressed before jumping up into Kim's lap with exaggerated purring and chin rubbing before curling up for a "nap." Kim was in awe the first time this happened, and Ramona finds it ceaselessly amusing every time it happens. ((Funny additonal scenario: once after this happened Scott was whining to Ramona, who was coming to join them on the couch, looking generally very sad/cute/pathetic, and overcome with a sort of playful evil, Ramona proceeded to sit by and cuddle up to Kim as well. Kim immediately froze up and went bright red and wide eyed, Scott's jaw probably dropped before he dove into a theatrical, exaggerated spewl about the betrayal of it all, and Ramona just got to blissfully enjoy Kim cuddles while giggling at both of their reactions and petting Gideon.))

Conversely, I don't know how Kim feels about dogs. Like, I don't think she hates them or anything like that, but maybe they fill her with a sense of pity, for their associations with unwavering loyalty. Something about that specifically runs too close to things she considers about herself, at times, maybe. Idk, just kinda spit ballin here.

I think she does like rats! And mice. Idk. They're cute little guys and I like them, let me have this--

Oh man... just Kim's section is so long. And I have other characters to get to,,, buckle up I guess--- I mean, I did start with My Girl, so maybe the others will be shorter?

((This is future future me again... this is where I actually went back and processed the ask properly :') I have no words to describe my current emotional state beyond that I am trying really hard not to burst into a little fit of laughter at myself and wake my roommate--))

Three! Three headcanons!! I can do this (restraintrestraintrestraint)

Okay! Let's try being Normal About Media- and just as a note, they aren't really in any particular order, beyond Kim being the first because she IS legitimately my favorite, I think. Idk she's very Me.

Ramona Flowers

1. She doesn't really do labels, for things like her idenity; she does think pride flags are pretty, though. Scott got her a bi flag once and she decided to keep it and hang it in her room for this exact reason, though she did explain to him that she doesn't really consider herself anything but herself- Ramona Flowers. He's very understanding about that, although a little confused in the typical Scott manner! They eventually come around to just considering it being his flag, when he comes to terms with himself (yeah, spoilers, I HC him as bi)

2. Her hair actually does have magic properties to it that prevent it from getting absolutely butchered by all the bleaching she does- she doesn't know how or why, though. Maybe it's less magic and more to do with the supplies themselves? Unlike Scott, she's not as meticulous when it comes to reading the status effect labels on things she uses or consumes.

3. Of her former partners, I think she does have genuine lingering feelings for Roxie. So far as the comics/movie go, she simply repressed the hell out of them and plays the Deny Deny Deny! game, but so far as the show goes, I think she's come to terms with the fact that she still loves her, but horrifically fumbled her- she doesn't want to hurt Roxie like that again, so she's unlikely to ever try things again between them, I think. Not unless Roxie was the initiator, and even then, it'd take some coaxing.

Bonus 4. She absolutely has feelings for Kim. I feel like maybe further into their relationship she'd 100% ask Scott like "hey... you know your really hot friend Kim?" and proceed to discuss with him if being in a polyamorous relationship is something he could get behind. Maybe it'd happen after a period of time with Kim living with them too, or something.

Roxie Richter

1. She gets ALL the girls- all of them. She's an unholy TERROR for men where she lives, because she is notorious for giving women the night of their lives and making them never look back so far as dating men goes. Now, I don't think she deliberately breaks up people or goes after "straight" girls or anything, but it's probably something that's happened on accident before, so she's A Menace. I will say that she might deliberately swoop in and woo a girl she knows is taken if it's extremely clear that their relationship is just Not Right- like if she's seeing clear signs of abuse, or something. She isn't intending to get with these girls when she does this, but she is fully intending to get them out of shitty situations. She's even turned girls down after their (ex) boyfriends have stormed off in a huff, simply out of respect for them- she'll try to give them advice, and if they're adamant in trying New Venues, she might play matchmaker where she can, but she isn't really comfortable sleeping with them after doing stuff like that- to her, it feels gross, maybe even exploitative.

2. I actually don't know if this is meant to be canon or not, because it's noted alongside some of her sketches, but she's german/japanese in my eyes- but raised in the states. She knows English the best, and some German, but she doesn't really know much Japanese, much to her own agitation- she just struggles with it a lot, for whatever reason. She can kind of read some things, but if she tries to speak it she runs the risk of butchering the words. I personally further HC her dad as German and her mom as Japanese- dad by process of elimination, mom based loosely on how I read some of her and Ramona's conversations in the comics.

3. She is in fact whistling the tune in the show intending it to be from the Robin Hood movie- in fact, I think I'm going to HC it as one of her favorite animated films from childhood. (... do I HC her as a furry now?)

Lisa Miller

1. Disaster Bi! She's a bit of a Menace and she knows it; she likes to rile people up, but she can't really take what she dishes out. Like, if she'd done the kind of seductive teasing she does to Scott to Kim and received any sort of flirting back, her brain would shut down and she'd need to reboot. She doesn't know how to handle when someone else takes the reigns, which is why it was so easy and fun to play with Scott- he was too stunned/shy to play back, which she enjoys. Not to imply she doesn't enjoy having her brain melted a little, of course.

2. I think she makes it big after she heads to America! Or at least, bigger than she was. She sends her friends back in Toronto signed copies of movie posters and CDs and things when she can- she doesn't expect them to keep them, although she loves it when they do, but at least in Scott's case it's sort of a "incase of emergency, please sell" sort of situation. He does not, obviously. (Ramona probably does, though, both from admittedly petty lingering jealousy and because they just don't have room for all of it; Scott rarely seems to notice anyhow, and the money usually goes towards rent or random gifts for him anyhow)

3. I forget if everyone's sudden absence is noticed when they Poof briefly during the finalt episode of the show, but if it is I feel like Lisa starts to talk to Kyle, since he's in front of her, like "hey, what exactly happened there-" before looking out over everyone else who reappeared in their seats and noticing Scott is actually up there with them. She spends the rest of that night chatting up him and the league, and maybe even scores an in with Matthew for getting a foothold in her acting career!

Matthew Patel

1 . He absolutely has a dedicated cult following for his theatrical works, and it's warranted! He's genuinely good at what he does, and his passion is clear as day; any production is lucky to have him, and he knows it, which can kind of lead to butting heads behind the scenes. I feel like he might come across to his fellow performers as full of himself, especially given his proficiency with one man performances, but he truly is just deeply, deeply passionate about his work, and he wants to feel that passion with anyone he works with, too. He NEEDS his energy matched to feel like it's going to be a grand performance, and he simply doesn't notice how off-putting this can be for his coworkers as a result.

2. The demon hipster chicks have always been the visual age they are now, even when Matthew was a kid; he viewed them as older sisters growing up, and they're very protective of him perhaps as a result. At his current age, they're his best friends and personal body guards- they'll descend like rabid dogs on anyone that steps out of line around him, if he doesn't call them off. Sometimes it's a bit much for him, but they're usually pretty good about understanding when they do and don't need to interfere on his behalf.

3. Ya know I'm not sure if it's a HC I've seen at all but I could really vibe with trans!masc Matthew. I would love that for him, truly.

Scott Pilgrim

1. Look... I really love any trans!Scott headcanons. Like, any direction, I've said before; I genuinely have such a problem figuring out which version I enjoy best: he's trans!masc and has been all along, or trans!fem and Ramona eventually helps to crack that egg. But also, while I'm saying this, he is. So stupid. Not like maliciously stupid in this sense, absolutely not, but I feel like he's the kind of person to like. Run into someone from his past post their transition, with THEM coming up to HIM to be like "oh long time no see, Pilgrim," and then he would say something to the affect of "oh, you have the same last name as (DN)!!! Are you related? Kim, Kim!! Do you know if (DN) had any siblings?" while Kim and the other person just stare at him deadpan for a bit before bursting into laughter at his expense. He would then proceed to be really confused and just not get it, either until they explain it to him or like, he'd just suddenly sit up in a cold sweat later that night realizing what he did like "oh my GOD that WAS them, I said their dead name at them like seven times!! I am Going To Hell!!!" (And Ramona would just kind of blindly, lightly slap around in his general direction, like "honey you're not going to hell for basically affirming the effectiveness of their transition, go the fuck to sleep. They would've said something if it was a problem." Idk, that's just how he feels to me.)

2. When he has his own money for things, and space living with Ramona, he spends it on video games or video game related merch- it's probably a lot of patches and t-shirts, but I can see him starting to collect plushies, too! Like some of the really old kinda silly looking Sonic plushies, for example? If I had my Knuckles one on hand I'd use him as an example, but I think he's in storage somewhere :(

3. Gets into really heated arguments about video game mechanics and stat stuff where applicable; like, Ramona has to drag him away or else he will actively start fighting people kind of heated. He can hold chill conversations, but if he feels like he's being talked down to about a game that he's REALLY into, like Sonic Adventure (he has the director's cut!)

Wallace Wells

1. MENACE TO SOCIETY. He's comparable to Roxie in this way except he is so much worse (I say this affectionately <3) because he does just straight up, in canon, do things like steal Stacey's boyfriends! And that's his friend that he's doing that to! So I cannot IMAGINE what mischief he gets up to when he goes out drinking. He's probably ruined so many lives, naybe even marriages. What am I saying, maybe? Definitely. And he feels no remorse about this! In his eyes either your man was already gay or you needed to treat him better, sweetie; he HAS been rejected before, so clearly his charms can't ruin what ain't already broken.

2. While he does have feeling for Scott, which is basically canon I don't even want to hear it, he KNOWS better. Like, he'd been living with Scott for a while, so he knows if they were legitimately dating he probably would be even more sick of him than he already is. When they were still living together, though, there were times where he couldn't help but wonder if it would really be all that bad... right before Scott comes in and does or says something that just highlights for Wallace that he's making the Sane choice. Besides, Wallace is (and i hate using these terms but I straight up don't know what other words I could possibly use) a sugar baby; he can't keep up being both a sugar baby and Scott's effective sugar daddy (HATEHATEHATE THAT WORD) while ALSO paying rent. It doesn't really work out that well, especially with him having, at the time, such a shitty apartment to begin with.

3. I feel like Wallace really enjoys his nightlife and getting to sleep around, so I'm unsure if this is something still in play while he's with Mobile, or if he respects Mobile enough to do away with that entirely. Like, different situations work for different relationships, so if Mobile is fine with it then maybe it's something that continues! But taking into account the sparks from the show, maybe he'd actually be really fine being exclusive with Mobile. Especially given how well their future selves seem to be doing. Idk! Basically the sum of this one is just that, if Wallace is exclusive with Mobile, he misses be a bit of a whore, but he's very happy where, and with who he is, now.

Envy Adams

1. She gives me vibes.. queer vibes... in some sort of direction.... idk if I'm fully behind her also being a comp. het lesbian or just labeling her a disaster bi, but I also get a vague sense of gender fuckery. It's entirely her name thing, probably, but I can see Envy being genderqueer.

2. She probably hunted Lynette down after that show- an arm was likely Not Enough to quite satisfy that rage. Especially since she didn't get the satisfaction of beating Todd more thoroughly herself, since Scott stepped in. Conversely, for the show canon, Wallace has a target on his back for the rest of her life, as far as she's concerned, even in a world where her feelings for Todd were just misunderstood- she considered him her best friend, and you don't get away with hurting her friends like that unless you're her.

3. I think I'd like to HC that some part of her regrets booting Scott from the band the way she did back in college? Maybe not immediately, or even soon, but I feel like sometimes she would think about him and their relationship as a whole and just feel bad, Idk. Like, she doesn't want to get back with him at all, but I could maybe see her offering to promote Shatterband (or Sex Bob-Omb, in the show,) or even play with him as a genuine apology instead of a coy trap somewhere down the line.

Knives Chau

1. Look... look I know I'm about to sound like a broken record... comp. het. lesbian or bi. HEAR ME OUT: her puppy dog love for Scott is really just that- something cute and innocent, but very intense, especially once he cuts her off in that honestly really brutal manner. Teenage heartbreak is messy- even if you feel like it was real, true love you had, you can often realize later in life that what you felt was just admiration, or something else innocuous like that. I think she reaffirms it to herself as a deep and true love because of how intense the pain of that breakup was, paired with everything that comes after, and I think the show really highlights that for me? Because in the show, with Scott out of the picture entirely, she's just a lot less intense about it. I think after playing music and hanging around his friends, she realizes she didn't really love him all that much, just thought he was a cool older guy and liked that he took an interest in her, even if she recognizes how wrong that was now. ((I probably have more articulate thoughts on this but I am really starting to feel the lack of pain meds so I need to get through this--))

2. Knives is really good at rhythm games and things like DDR or, when it's eventually released, Just Dance. Like, freakishly good. She picks them up just as well and just as quickly as she did her instruments.

3. With how quickly she picked up her instruments, she kinda gives me honor student vibes? Idk. I feel like it'd be a little stressful for her later on, because I do think her passionate drive for music makes her grades take a slight spin, but she just gives off that energy for me. Knives is a lot smarter than people give her credit for, I think, Idk.

... yes, I am very normal about media... spending 3 hours on 1 ask that offered me a lot more simplicity than I can apparently manage...

#asks #txt #kim pine #ramona flowers #roxie richter #lisa miller #Matthew Patel #scott pilgrim #wallace wells #envy adams #knives chau #i think i might have said this in the post but maybe i didnt or removed it- they're not necessarily ordered by like. most to least favorite #i just kinda chucked same names on there and went. debated starting some for lucas but i think my hands need a break- and my stomach a Snac #spto #sp comic #spvtw #headcanons #scott pilgrim takes off #scott pilgrim comic #scott pilgrim vs the world #potential spoilers for both the comics and the show i think?#if anyone wants this tagged w ship stuff for my little blurb under Kim lemme know #also I didn't include Roxie in the list of characters I think she likes but she should have been an honorable mention. i mostly had comic +#+ brain with that section #long post #woollyworm #demon hipster chicks #scott pilgrim headcanons

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rose-echo · 4 months

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How much I wish I could tell people around me about shifting 🫠

Like there's things I'm undecided about, and my sister always gives such a new perspective and some help when I have to make a decision of any kind

and i have so many decisions to do when it comes to my script but i can't ask her because she thinks shifters are delusional and crazy or whatever

Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

#someone please be my shifting bestie so we can help each other pick stuff for our script #please please #shiftblr #shifters #shifting community #reality shifting #shifting #shifting blog #shifter #shifting antis dni #desired reality #quantum jumping #reality shift #shifting realities #current reality

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its-all-papaya · 8 days

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out of fic scope but landoscar with teenager emma? Hehe

surprise u didn't know it but u assigned me a to-do list thx anon!!

assign me a chore!! (or just send me an ask and i'll assign myself tbh)

nothing is out of fic scope at this point, it's like a 100k universe in my brain that includes the original chaptered fic and like 50 spin-offs. it's really out-of-hand.

anyway, i was thinking about this this morning on my commute but i wanted to force myself to do a chore before answering, so i've been pondering this one all day.

my original thought was oscar's going to race until his mid-to-late 30's at least probably, so Emma will be a teenager and he'll still be in F1. so then I was thinking about emma in the paddock, because i was like she'd DEFINITELY be a social queen (she's lando's daughter) so everyone would have known her most of her life, it's like a second home and she loves going to races whenever she can. and then i was thinking about emma loving the paddock back, and i was like... you know what makes sense in my brain? emma who LOVES f1 and always has, whose most important influences and parent figures (other than actual bio dad obvi) all lived and breathed it her whole childhood, who is probably fascinated by the details and intricacies. so anyway, emma who wants to study to be a race engineer or mechanic. right? like she loves chatting with oscar's pit wall and looking at data with them and talking with osc after races about the strategy and his decision-making process and oscar obviously loves it too, because he loves racing. and lando LIKES f1 and UNDERSTANDS f1 because he karted as a kid, but he's not deeply fascinated by race craft the way emma is. so we get individual special bonding between teenage emma and oscar that they both cherish.

anyway, outside of that, she'll be a teenage girl, so she'll definitely have her moments of drama and irritation and freezing her parents out, but she loves them both deeply and admires them as people. probably embarrassed by lando around race weekends bc she wants to be seen as grown up and mature, so she'd be a bit of an asshole to him sometimes. obligatory "you're not even my legal parent, stop telling me what to do" to oscar when he's asking her to do her homework or telling her she can't go out alone with a date to an event at 11pm. but yeah. mostly just growing pains. not having a female figure in the house with her is really frustrating to her sometimes, like she probably cries when she's having period cramps and doesn't have a mom to help her, but it's passing. she's close with lando's mum and maybe pietra a bit, or one of lando or oscar's sisters. still likes to cuddle with one of her dads when she's sad or sick. i'm undecided if she'll ever call oscar "dad" or an equivalent moniker or just "osc" forever, but she definitely THINKS of him as her second dad from the time she's like five or six. so yeah. normal teenage stuff.

thanks for asking!! i loved thinking about teenage emma.

#answered #dad lando

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yeullove · 1 month

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YOU'RE A LANE KINNIE OMGG ok so i need to ask you everything *clears throat and pulls out clipboard*

which lane are u playing as? what route with which li? what are your fave outifts so far etc etc 👁️👁️📝

Hi @a-cloud-for-dreams !

Thank you for asking! 😃

(This is gonna be a loooong answer so please bear with me)

*Mild SPOILERS*

I have like...3 saves for HS:R (might buy the extra slots someday). I like how the story could differ a lot depending on the choices you take and the paths you're on. I find that the decisions you make could affect your overall experience with HS:R, too.

I'm pursuing Greg in my first and third slot just to see how different the interactions would be between humanity vs no humanity path.

When it comes to MC, I use 3 different sprites for each saves. Most of them were based on anime or game characters I like.

How my MCs look in-game:

1. God's Voice (a.k.a. VoG)/Compassion (humanity) path

Name: Lane

Main LI: Greg

Her looks was inspired by Alice from "Alice Madness Returns". I was interested in the idea of her having some sympathy despite being cold and calculating most of the time. Just because she's quiet and reserved, it doesn't mean she's uncaring. This quote from American McGee really helped me "define" my MC's character in my first slot.

"She's not insane, nor is she uncaring. She's been shattered, yes, but she's working conscientiously to put the pieces back together."

- American McGee on Alice

I also used this video as a reference:

youtube

And this image as a cherry on top:

2. Devil's Whisper (a.k.a. WoD)/Compassion (humanity) path

Name: Lain

Main LI: undecided (Greg/Cain)

MC's appearance was based on Lain from "Serial Experiments Lain". I like how logical and cunning she is in WoD path. Her approach in life is much more ruthless but still sensible. She reminds me of Lain in episode 10 when she "misused" her power to do the right thing.

I found a fashion youtuber who made Lain-inspired outfit ideas. Check it out!

youtube

3. God's Voice (VoG)/No Compassion (no humanity) path

Name: Layne

Main LI: Greg

I took inspiration from Michiko Malandro, one of the main characters in the anime "Michiko to Hatchin". This time, I want to play as someone who knows what's right or wrong but not having enough empathy to fully understand it. Funny enough, I started this path out of....pettiness haha. I was curious about the kiss scene in the end of season 1 only to deal with the consequence in season 2 😭. I thought the kiss was done out of pity??

Someone on YT made a compilation of Michiko's outfits throughout the show. And yes, she's serving. 💅

youtube

When it comes to outfits, it's hard to pin down because I like most of them. But, I have a few that I frequently use.

Judging by how the story revolves around moving from one place to another to survive, I usually choose something more practical for her (not every outfit I've picked is the most practical, though).

Honorable Mention:

Ada Wong, is that youu???! 🤭

That's it. Thank you!! ❤️❤️❤️

Update:

I tried romancing Cain in my second slot only to get sidetracked by Greg, again 🫠. Not that I'm mad about it.

#asks #a-cloud-for-dreams #rc heaven's secret requiem #rc hsr #rc lane #this was super fun #sorry this took longer than I expected 🫠#this turned into chaos real quick 😭😭

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not-poignant · 8 days

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Hi! I've spent this whole week binge-reading all of the Underline the Rainbow series and I'm obsessed. Thank You for creating this incredible world!

Sorry if these are questions you've answered before somewhere but I'm really curious about female Omegas and Alphas, especially in relation to Hillview's sister-site that was mentioned briefly.

Firstly, seeing as knotting and penetration are a big part of how Omegas manage heats, does this mean that female Alphas aren't able to consummate heats effectively? (If so, I imagine this would be a big source of insecurity for female Alphas who are attracted to Omegas!) Are female Alphas still able to create claim bonds?

I was also wondering what the reasoning is between having the different sites be segregated by primary sex in this way. Why was the decision made to have a separate sister-site specifically for female Omegas instead of having Hillview accept all Omegas regardless of primary sex?

Hallooooo!

I'm so so glad you're enjoying the series! :D

So, when it comes to women alphas and alphas who have uteruses, I am actually undecided on if they also have pseudococks or not at this point, but we do know from the worldbuilding that we absolutely don't need knotting or penetration to actually solve a heat.

The thing that matters most is an alpha's pheromones - and this is actually seen literally within Underline the Black, when Gary's closeness, his saliva, his pheromones, are the thing that resolves Efnisien's agonising, corrupted heat. So we've seen 'don't need knotting or penetration to solve a heat' actually play out within the story.

Temsen makes it very clear that if Gary had provided solid closeness, touch, and intervention earlier, Efnisien would never have needed to go through so much pain.

We also see in Underline the Blue that where Nate assumes he'll need a lot more penetration and knotting to get through his heat, Janusz demonstrates that a lot of the time he just needs closeness and pheromones, towards the end getting Nate to scent him, which calms him down better than a knot and actually finishes his heat much faster. So while the knotting in that circumstance absolutely helped, it was the pheromones that soothed and ended the heat the fastest.

In fact Nate will have to unlearn the idea that 'lots of penetrative sex and knotting' is what solves a heat, this is what Christian brainwashed him to believe. Janusz is already demonstrating that closeness, genuine intimacy, trust and safety, and the right pheromones, go a really long way to making heats pass as smoothly as possible. (The semen helps a lot, but that can be ingested, and applies in other ways, and likewise, alpha women secretions can be the same).

I'm certain that when it comes to most f/f pairings etc. the same thing applies regardless of what's going on between their legs (it is common in many omegaverse stories for women alphas to also have cocks or pseudococks and knots / pseudoknots. Since this isn't relevant at all for me in Underline I've never really sat down and kind of made it official either way, but we do know that all alphas can resolve a heat for an omega without knotting/penetration. I'm pretty certain women alphas / alphas with uteruses have zero insecurities re: bonding with omegas, or helping them through their heats. They'd have more insecurity over the fact that it's extremely hard for them to get pregnant.

In fact, if resolving a heat was as easy as knotting/penetration and had nothing to do with pheromones, omegas could resolve their own heats without needing alphas at all, and they could just use sex toys and knotting dildos, and this world doesn't work that way. Though other omegaverse worlds do.)

Are female Alphas still able to create claim bonds?

Women alphas and alphas with uteruses have literally no reason why they couldn't! It has nothing to do with genitalia and everything to do with alpha pheromones, just being alphas means they have the right pheromones to create claim bonds.

I was also wondering what the reasoning is between having the different sites be segregated by primary sex in this way.

In a word: Pregnancy.

Alphas and omegas are hyperfertile with one another. It's pregnancy. The risk is just too high. There are no ORFs on the planet - both the decent ones and the dystopian ones, that allow for mixed sex pairings because the pregnancy risk is just too high. Condoms aren't built to handle like...the semen load / repeated knotting etc. and have an extremely high fail rate and there's no contraception that works reliably for omegas in general (this is actually also why many alpha/omega pairings are same sex in general).

But yeah it's not very professional to send your partner to a rehabilitation facility and then have them get repeatedly pregnant while there, so instead all ORFs deal with the pregnancy risk this way instead, and that way there's absolutely zero risk of this happening. This is also why all the other attending staff at Hillview who are alphas are also male (like Temsen and Dr Gary), to completely erase the risk. (They don't worry about betas because they just...don't, lmao (that's good old beta bigotry)).

I hope that helps :D

#asks and answers #underline worldbuilding #underline the black #underline the blue #what's going on between the legs of alphas at the sister site #it's a mystery #i'm quite fond of the concept of pseudophalli #but i'm also just sure that no matter what they're doing #the pheromones and basically getting their secretions into the body of an omega #is what resolves the heat #knotting can help absolutely #but we see more than one corrupted heat resolved without it #(one is going to happen for Alois Flitmouse as well in Underline the Gold)#at least one i think from memory #this is good because knots can cause a lot of injury to omegas who have issues in that area #having alternatives is necessary #it's not just a knotting+penetration thing #i would say it's almost mainly just pheromones and the amount that can be given to an omega #in a single instance

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femmefatalevibe · 1 year

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how do you decenter men & dating? do you ever feel like it's difficult to handle the social pressure to have a partner/"time is running out"?

Honestly, I think my personality has a lot to do with it. I've always been called "stubborn" since I was a young girl and have been making nearly all life decisions for myself since I was a pre-teen/teenager, so creating a meaningful life has always been my top priority. The thought of centralizing my happiness or validity in this world around a phantom man who might or might not show up, or even worse, negatively impact my life – either short-term or permanently – in some way has never made sense to me.

It also helped that dating was something I never discussed with my family as a kid, never had any parental pressure/input on whether I should or shouldn't date, and have gotten next to no questions about boys/men basically ever. Of the 2-3 times or so it has come up as an adult, I set a boundary on my private life and just remind them of the question they're asking if no one is serious enough for me to mention on my own.

With friends, I don't feel pressured to be in a relationship just because they might be or looking for a partner. If anything, I find it entertaining to chat about it when they inevitably start asking for my advice or input on a given person or situation, lol.

I perceive general societal pressure to date for commitment or idealizing a relationship with a man as a projection of other people's neediness that I don't feel the inclination to entertain. If someone enjoys companionship, great for them, but I find it quite presumptive that someone can't differentiate between their personal needs and every other woman/person in society. We're all unique. If you're secure enough in your choices, you shouldn't need to spend your free time convincing others that your way of life is superior to others who choose a different path. I feel sorry for them, honestly.

In terms of "time running out," I think being child-free takes off the burden of this race against a "biological clock." I can imagine if someone wants children, the idea of dating, relationships, marriage, and timelines is a lot more stressful. I'm glad to see that many women who are undecided about kids or are giving themselves time to pursue other goals are starting to take advantage of egg freezing services en masse and speaking about their experiences publicly. I applaud all of you for exercising your right to bodily autonomy. You're all incredible for changing the narrative and idealization of women to become mothers as young as possible.

If you mean worried about "time running out" from a purely chronological perspective, I have the opposite view. Why would I want to waste my 20s – the years of youth, energy, and self-discovery – on a man that I probably will no longer speak to in the next 6 months or 1-2 years? I would be running out of time to set my life in the ways I want if I decided to put a considerable amount of energy into finding a partner and focusing on men (or anyone else's approval past a client relationship, interpersonal boundary, or ethical principle, of course).

Hope this was useful in some way xx

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snek-panini · 2 years

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New book? New book. This one was actually finished about two weeks ago, but we've been moving to a new apartment so everything has been chaos and this is the first chance I've had to post it.

Look at my beautiful creation! I love it so much! This is a bind of Lunacy, a Good Omens fic by snae_b, who is a phenomenal author and has written some of my favorite AU fics, like this atmospheric horror story set in space. There isn't a lot of scifi in this fandom but this one's my favorite. More pics and process talk under the cut!

I was a little worried about mixing patterns on this project, but both the papers I found were so perfect I couldn't choose one, and in the end I love how it turned out. The black paper came from Barnes and Noble (apparently they sell big sheets of fancy paper there now?? But not on the website, only in person) and the colorful stuff on the spine came from Joanne's. Here's a close-up of that:

The pale stars on the spine are metallic silver, and the black ones are some kind of glossy embossed black. Spine paper has blue and white and gray flecks on it, like a nebula. I have never claimed to be a photographer. The middle photo shows the back, where I made an error. It has some air bubbles that I didn't see at first, so I didn't smooth it out enough before the glue dried. Only bothers me a little, though.

Pic of the endpaper, which is much more blue in real life and matches the blue accents in the spine paper. I tried something new here, which was carving out grooves for the sewing tapes to lie in when it's all glued down, so they don't make lumps in the endpaper. It was only partially a success, since you can still see them. I'll try again next time with deeper grooves and shorter tapes. Ribbon bookmark on the interior, as always. Had a hard time choosing between the gray and a narrower, very bright midnight blue. I was undecided, they both looked great, and of the two people I asked for input, one voted gray and the other voted blue. Not helpful, guys. The gray is more subtle, so I went with that since the cover is already very bold, and I'm very happy with it, but much angst went into the decision.

That's all the pics for now! A real-life friend (Hi Sam!) asked me about font choice a while ago and I meant to put that in this post but it's already super long so I think I'll make another post just for that. It's coming, just probably not today. Now we're mostly moved in I'm eager to get back to making books, and I plan to join in for Renegade Bindery's Binderary event in February, so there will be More Books coming soon.

#bookbinding #fanbinding #snek makes books #sometimes snek is frustrated that she has so much still to learn #but she learns more with every project #good omens #fic rec #i feel like i'm forgetting to tag something

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araneitela · 1 year

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While I have these noted in my OneNote, putting them on here may... make it that I write these down more thoroughly faster. But, meta-topics that I'm planning on elaborating on:

— Kafka's semblance of 'boredom' and its manifestation. This is seen across the board through either suggesting or engaging in both more trivial and more significant 'games'. But a great example is the "trial" during the on-going Jepella Rebellion. Throughout the entire sequence, we see the judges with flaring red eyes that glow brighter at numerous intervals, and when she's "let to plead her case" a bit more thoroughly towards the end of it, we're shown a red string breaking (timestamp: 2:08); you see the judges' eyes return to normal and they are in a state of severe mental disorientation and panic. The string breaking marked the intended end of Kafka's Spirit Whisper on them. The entire trial was nothing more than a mockery of the court: her game. As Sam notes at the end (timestamp: 2:32), "You should really stop playing with your food; Kafka." He meant it. Kafka plays games when many likely wouldn't due to a sense of risk. Aside from being immune to this due to the lack of fear that she claims the populace of Pteruges-V (or at least, New Babylon) to have, this playfulness is likely an added manifestation of this. We know that she doesn't fall victim to the same follies as others from this same planet, "I used to be a Devil Hunter (...) When people don’t feel fear, they are dominated by desire and pleasure – they become “devils”, so this may be a different form of 'pleasure' in the simple form of entertainment. The Jepella 'trial' is simply the most evident example.

— The two different manners of speech. We're overtly familiar with the incredibly seductive delivery of most of her dialogue, but there are instances where Kafka's delivery is quite different and it is incredibly intentional. The very first instance of this, is when she first speaks to the Trailblazer. It is not as consistent, and there is still usually a lingering element of playfulness to the end of most words' pronunciations (there are specific lines that are a lot more evident, such as "When you have a chance to make a choice, make one that you know you won't regret" at the end of the sequence). This could be blamed on the fact that this was an early recording and they were undecided; however, the decision of having two different 'vocal deliveries' has been set in stone with Kafka's story/companion quest. Thankfully, I found this to help make it very obvious.

— Not feeling fear does not equate lack of emotions and/or the concept of humanity. For me, 'fear' is merely one of many emotions that humanity possesses, it is tied in with many (all) others but it is not representative, on its own, of all emotions in their entirety. The reason I make note of this is Kafka's inherent tie to musicality, one of numerous great 'arts' that requires great emotion to properly understand and appreciate. Now, part of me wondered if she perhaps lacked this as well, and whether, because of that, this was one of her 'goals' within the Stellaron Hunters as well. But when looking at the individually noted goals for each of them, "they who chase after fear" (Kafka) is separate from "they who inquire meaning" (strongly hinted at being Sam), which renders the question null and void. Aside from that, she actively seems to harbor an element of care towards the Trailblazer, but most undeniably, she actively harbors a semblance of care and concern for Blade's state of being in her story quest. This also means, to me, that Kafka harbors the ability of affection.

— Her character banner was called 'Nessun Dorma', named after arguably the most famous tenor arias in all of opera (yes, you've likely heard it even if you're not into opera). As much as she is very much tied to classical music throughout the game, and showing an active investment in it, this is entirely different as it is a vocal performance, rather than instrumental as all other musical passages used for her have been. Nessun Dorma is an aria in the final act of a musical called Turandot. This is a fantasy tale that unfolds in China, where a beautiful but very cold princess (Turandot) poses three riddles to any suitor who dares court her, and commands the death of all who fail. When an unknown prince (he who sings 'Nessun Dorma) ultimately triumphs, the opera ends in a love story with a happy ending. Hoyoverse doesn't do things without reason, and so this intrigues me relentlessly. But moreover, the riddles and their answers really get the cogs in my head to spin wildly; as this reeks of Kafka in more ways than one:

"What is born each night and dies at dawn?" Hope.

"What flickers red and warm like a flame, yet is not fire?" Blood.

"What is like ice yet burns?" Turandot (the princess in question).

#[ ooc. ] don't try to make it logical or edit your soul according to the fashion. rather; follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.#[ mini study. ] she must have sought something extraordinary. everything she does comes at a great cost.#[ now while I'm still going to be in photoshop for the evening-- possibly even working on a little promo as i actually am interested in...#[ getting kafka out there in the same way as i did for guizhong; seele is the more private one. ]#[ i did want to note a few things down now that i have my tags sorted. ]#[ any way hello-- welcome to my insane kafka brainrot. i have a /lot/ to say. ]#[ these were supposed to be little one-liner reminders for myself. ]#[ also these are only 4 that initially come to mind-- there's more. i'll likely be reblogging this post. ]

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mj-iza-writer · 8 months

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Sp Special Containment part 10

If you are new to this story line or just need an update on the story, please use the hashtag SP Special Containment. -MJ

The Director sat at his desk and looked through the reports, he smiled as he saw Jaimie didn't do anything during her outing.

A knock came at the door.

"Come in."

The guard who released Jaimie came in awkwardly.

"Can I just say I am so sorry", the guard looked down.

"Oh your sorry, come sit down", the Director sighed, "you do realize sorry wouldn't have cut it if I had to contact some families today, and tell them their family member was severely injured or killed. I would not have been able to tell them how or why because this job is classified. I would not have been able to give them any closure on their family members death or injury."

The guard looked down.

"Twenty kills", the Director sighed.

"I'm sorry", the guard looked up.

"Jaimie has killed at least twenty people, just to give you an idea of what we are protecting the world from. Whumpee has killed eighteen at least", the Director flipped a page, "Aramais has killed fifty people. I have no records on Mitch, but I'm sure it's high."

The guard gulped.

"She could have slit your throat, and went off on killing spree. None of us would have known anything until it was happening. Thankfully she is typically friendly and nothing happened", the Director continued, "she could have also wandered into something dangerous and gotten injured or killed herself. She could have even gotten outside. I'm sure she had been out for long enough before the shutdown happened."

The guard frowned, "I don't know what else I can say besides I'm sorry. I feel bad and didn't take my job seriously. I'm sorry."

"You are being removed from the sight, I can't chance this happening again. Your memory will be wiped, and you will be transferred to holding until you are cleared to leave", the Director sighed, "in other words, you are fired."

The guard looked down sadly, "yes sir, I understand."

After a few guards took them away the Director went through the votes for the unit.

"Mostly yes, with a few no, there are three undecided", the Director looked at the names, "Caretaker, Andy, and Mcgee."

"Those three will be my decision makers then", the Director sighed, "then meeting with Aramais, Jaimie, and Whumpee. Lastly, will be Mitch."

Cass sat in the bed in Mitch's room doing homework and talking to Mitch, the guard sat by the door.

"What are you doing over there?", Mitch tried to look.

"I'm doing homework", Cass looked up, "I have a few college credits to make up before I graduate, then I can also move up to being a researcher here, I just need the diploma", Cass smiled.

"Oh", Mitch sighed, "I didn't get past tenth grade, things happened within my family. I wasn't any good with school anyways. Learning disabilities and impatient teachers made me hate school."

"I'm sorry", Cass set aside the work and got up so Mitch could see them better.

"Then my trainers said schooling wasn't necessary, so I didn't have to worry about it", Mitch continued, "I do wish I could at least read better, reading always seems to calm me down."

"I like reading, I have a book right here. Do you want me to read to you?", Cass went to their backpack, and pulled out a book.

"If you want, it will help pass the time", Mitch sighed, "I don't want to disturb your work though."

"You're not, I can take break", Cass sat on the floor in front of Mitch.

"Hey Cass", a guard came over the speaker, "it looks like Caretaker, Andy, and Mcgee have gone up to the Director's office for the meeting, did you miss a text?"

"Not that I'm aware of", Cass looked at his phone, then got up and looked at Mitch.

"If you need to go that's fine, you can read to me later. If you want to at least", Mitch chuckled, "can you mention that I am extremely uncomfortable and about to snap though."

Cass nodded, "I'll be back, and I'll bring it up to the Director. I know you've been sitting like this for a while."

Later another knock interrupted the Director.

"Come in", the Director looked up.

"Ah, Caretaker, Mcgee, and Andy. I didn't ask you to come up yet", the Director sighed, "I'm still working on a few plans.

Andy sighed, "Aramais knew something was up, I told him we were not keeping secrets, but I myself am not allowed to talk about it. I let him know they would be next to find out after you met with us", Andy frowned, "he said he wanted water, then told me to get the meeting over with so he didn't have to wait."

"He is always so impatient", the Director sighed.

"Jaimie is napping, tired from her adventures today, so I thought it would be okay to come up. I wasn't expecting these two to be up here though", Mcgee smiled.

"Whumpee was playing eyespy with the guards so I had some free time", Caretaker nodded at Mcgee, "did she enjoy her chips?"

"Yes, though she fell asleep with her hand partially in one of the bags", Mcgee grinned.

"Okay, well, let's call Cass up here then. We'll get started", the Director went to grab their phone.

"Can I just ask before Cass comes up here. Do you truly believe they're ready for this? They are still in school, this is a full-time job, I just don't know how this is going to work", Andy frowned.

"I believe Cass knows what they can manage, if they say its manageable, then we will work with them to make sure it is", the Director looked at Andy, then the other two, "I believe Cass has a good chance. Plus, from the interactions I've seen and what the guards have seen, I believe Mitch might like Cass a little."

"Yeah, until he gets loose, and attacks Cass. Or, he gets inside of Cass's head and does something", Andy frowned.

"There will be a guard always present in the room, at least until we can fully trust Mitch, and we are preparing a holding room specifically for Mitch", the Director grabbed the phone.

Only a minute after sending the message, Cass entered the room and frowned at the group.

"I was outside listening, I'm glad to know you have faith in my abilities with Mitch", Cass came in farther.

Mcgee and Andy looked at each other, Caretaker grinned at the Director.

"I may be a junior researcher and I'm still in school, but maybe because I am so young I'm just stupid enough to make this work", Cass grinned, "I will probably need help with how my schedule looks right now, but I want to try. I like Mitch, and I don't want him to die because of me."

"Cass listen...", Andy started.

"No you listen, I am the top of my class, I am only a few credits away from graduating. I will be fully available in a few months", Cass argued.

Caretaker chuckled causing everyone to look at him.

"Why are you laughing at me, out of all of you I thought you would side with me", Cass made an angry look at Caretaker.

"Because I see a lot of me in you", Caretaker winked, "to be a junior researcher you learn to follow the book, when you transfer to being a researcher like these two numbskulls here", Caretaker pointed at Andy and McGee, "the books become your priority, anything out of the box is ignored. When you become a senior researcher like me, you take all of those books and burn them all. By then you know that those books don't equal real life experiences. If you are this ready to do this, and you believe this strongly you can do it and help Mitch, then I'm happy to help you in any way I can."

Cass sighed and smiled at Caretaker, "than-thankyou sir."

Caretaker looked at Andy and McGee, who both looked down.

Caretaker slapped the back of Andy's head.

"Okay, okay fine, I'll help, but we need to do this by the book", Andy glanced at Caretaker, "or at least in a way that everyone is kept safe. Like you've said, Whumpee needs to be protected from Mitch."

"I do agree with that", Caretaker nodded, "there is a lot of trauma pent up in Whumpee that we haven't been able to work on yet."

"If we are in agreement am I allowed to move to my next faze of talking to the human weapons, then. After that I will talk to Mitch and see if he even wants this. Then we plan everything else", the Director looked at the group.

Caretaker nodded, "yes."

"Yes", Mcgee smiled at Cass.

"Okay", Andy sighed.

Cass turned to the Director, "yes."

"Alright", the Director grinned, "wish me luck talking to the weapons. I'll visit them individually so they can ask their own questions and not feel judged by each other. If I could have each of you present in the room as well that would be great."

On the way down the hall Cass stopped Caretaker.

"Sir I am so sorry for yelling at you, I didn't mean..", Cass made a worried look.

"It's okay, I enjoyed seeing your passion for this. That's how I know you'll do great, and be a full researcher in know time. Maybe one day we will be senior researchers together", Caretaker smiled, "if you ever need my help, or you have a question don't be afraid to ask me, okay."

"Yes sir, thankyou so much", Cass smiled.

Taglist. As always please let me know if you want to be added or taken off of the list. It's not a problem at all. @villainsandheroes @the-beasts-have-arrived @sacredwrath @porschethemermaid @monarchthefirst @generic-whumperz @bloodyandfrightened @freefallingup13 @notpeppermint @cyborg0109 @idontreallyexistyet @thebejeweledwatercat @painfulplots

Sp Special Containment taglist. @written-by-jayy

#sp special containment #original story #whump community #whumplr #whumblr #whump stuff #whump writing #whump ideas #whump #whumpee #whump scenario #whumper #caretaking #oc #whump series

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aintgonnatakethis · 3 months

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Heyo tell me about flu o'clock and voyeur! ❤

Hey @frostysfrenzy! ❤️️

I talked about Flu O'Clock here, but I'll expand on the platonic OT3 idea I've got going on. Recently I had a chat about how lonely Young is with @bagheerita and how that's the cause of many of his Terrible Decisions™. He's touch-starved and doesn't know how to communicate and actually ask for what he wants, so he does stupid things because that's what the society he's grown up in has taught him to do. There's an intense amount of unpacking he would have to do in order to have a healthy relationship, a lot of - dare I say - deprogramming from how he's been taught to approach/treat the women he's interested in. He doesn't think about the long term consequences of his actions, for either himself or his partners and it inevitably leads to heartbreak. His problem is that despite repeated failure, he'll just go out and do the exact same thing next time. The definition of madness, etc, etc.

So getting back around to OT3 stuff, I think some simple physical affection would do wonders for Young. He gets it from Telford to an extent currently, when they get drunk and Telford will stay over and they'll cuddle. But the more options for this the better, not to mention if Young and Rush are on better terms it would make things easier for Telford.

Voyeur is another perfect example of Young's, uh, "problems". Warning for dub-con, sort of maybe I'll probably tag it as that when I post it but there are "circumstances". Anyway, it's part of my on your hands and your knees, do you feel in charge? series and involves Telford and Rush heading back to Destiny in a damaged shuttle. The damage means they can't receieve any radio signals from Destiny, but Destiny can listen in on them, something they don't realise. I'm sure you can see where this is going…

Young listens in on them having sex and jerks off to it. I'm undecided on what the aftermath of that decision is going to be, but it's probably going to involve him telling Telford, meaning that's another secret Telford has to keep from Rush because of Young (previous: Young's vicarphilia kink getting off on Telford recounting the sex he has with Rush, that time Young kissed him). I don't think Telford would care, but Rush 100% would!

The door to Young's room swooshes open and Eli practically sprints into the room. Young is half out of his chair - all the worst case scenarios rushing through his head - before the radio Eli is carrying… moans. "They just started," Eli begins babbling. "I was on my own in the core room so no one else heard." He thrusts the radio at Young like it's a bomb liable to go off at any moment. Shit. Okay. This isn't a problem, Young tells himself, gingerly taking possession of the radio. "Eli," he says as the man turns to leave. "You can't tell anyone about this." "Fuck, Nick!" comes from the radio. "Yes, yes, of course not. I just don't want to…" Eli gestures wildly. "Listen. Please." Young nods. "Yeah. Yeah, get out of here." Eli all but flees, thankfully remembering to close the door behind him. A wet sound comes from the radio. Young hurriedly puts it down. Eli's a good kid. The younger generation aren't as tightly wound as Young's. He was at MIT. Massachusetts is Democrat. He's never had a problem with Camile. He gets on well enough with Rush these days, especially as Young no longer asks him to spy on the other man. He's clearly a bit intimidated by Telford, but civilians often are. There's no reason to think he'll spread rumours and he's kept secrets well in the past. He's never told a soul about Rush planting Spencer's gun in Young's quarters. "Yeah," Telford murmurs, which means Young can't help but look at the radio. "You can take it deeper than that." Young feels his cheeks colour and sits down heavily. He can't believe he's going to be forced to listen to this. He supposes he could turn the radio off, but then they wouldn't know if anything went wrong with the shuttle, if they'd have to divert course to pick them up. It wouldn't be responsible. He's gonna rib David about this so much. They're going to get drunk as hell and David's inevitably going to get in a few jabs about how eager Young's been to hear about all his sexual exploits over the years, so isn't he over the moon to get to listen to it in real time?

Young: I can't believe I'm being forced to listen to this. I suffer so much in life.

🙄🙄🙄

WIP Name Game

#i'm gonna get through all the asks i got for this game i promise #real life is calming back down after an intense upheaval so i should be able to catch up soon #ask #frostysfrenzy #wip game #writeblr #writers on tumblr #my quote #mine #sgu #ask game #everett young

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shiningwonderland · 9 months

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Ren Jinguji (Repeat)

Translator: Mimi (Twitter: _mimisaurora)

December — A Fickle Score

It's now December, and I still haven't been able to talk much with Jinguji-san.

To study abroad....

It's without a doubt an amazing opportunity, but....

It's such a significant decision to make.

Besides....

I catch a glimpse of Jinguji-san.

He looks to be having a fun chat with the girls about the dance party.

Haruka: It’s already that time of year, huh….

A dance party will be held on Christmas Day at the academy's party hall.

The party hall.... The place Jinguji-san took me to during summer break.

I would like to go to the dance with him too....

Should I try asking him...?

Select the phrase!

Talk to him (+20 Love +0 Music)

Haruka: U-Um… Jinguji-san.

I muster up my courage and try to approach him, but he just stares at me silently.

I can tell without him having to tell me.

His gaze clearly shows that he did not want me getting any closer or speaking to him.

Haruka: Nevermind….

I give up and back away.

I will try to talk to him another time.

I couldn't bring myself to talk to him at another point during the day, and now, it was after school.

Haruka: Sigh… Looks like there’s no one I can talk to about this….

Ryuya: Hey, Nanami. You’re here at the right time. I thought someone might still be sticking around, and you're the right person for the job.

Do you have any plans after this? If not, I'd like you to help me... Can you transcribe this song onto some sheet music?

Select the phrase!

Leave it to me! (+0 Love +15 Music)

Ryuya: Great. I can count on you then.

And so, while listening to the song he'd given me, I transcribe it onto sheet music.

Haruka: Let's see... This part is…

Ryuya: By the way, Nanami. Have you gotten the chance to talk to Jinguji about you studying abroad?

At the abrupt question, I pause for a moment.

Select the phrase!

It’s been difficult talking to him about it (+20 Love +0 Music)

Ryuya: If you’re struggling to talk about it, does that mean you’re seriously considering the offer?

Haruka: …No, I’m still undecided…. I just don’t know how to bring it up to him….

I came to this academy because I want to become a composer.

I’ve been working hard to write songs for idols.

All I had to say is, "I'm going to study abroad."

Those words are the golden ticket for my dream come true.

It will come true, but....

Why does my heart hurt so much?

Ryuya: Are you having second thoughts?

Haruka: Yes. I think it’s a wonderful opportunity. I honestly am undeserving of it.

I'm also well aware that it would be rude to turn it down. But….

Ryuya: It’s Jinguji, isn’t it? You’re worried about him. Well, he is your partner, so it’s only natural to be concerned.

Haruka: …You’re right. I am helplessly captivated by Jinguji's voice and his very presence.

I can't allow this to end with that voice, that incredible presence, that brilliant aura… going to waste.

I want to write him a song that is second to none. It’s what I’ve been working so hard toward this entire time.

My dream is no longer merely just about becoming a composer. I want to debut with Jinguji-san.

Ryuya: I see. It sounds like you're pretty devoted to Jinguji.... In that case, it would be all the more reason to go now and decline the offer to study abroad. Why are you hesitating?

Haruka: ...It's exactly because I'm so obsessive over Jinguji-san that I'm having second thoughts. I wonder if he really needs me.

I guess you could say our enthusiasm towards all this is so vastly different. Jinguji-san is not as interested in singing or being an idol as I thought he was.

I'm the only one devoted to this debut, and it's pushing me to get desperate. I see how I might actually be more of a nuisance than anything else.

Ryuya: Well, that may be true. But it’s useless mulling it over without confirming the details without confirming with the guy himself.

Haruka: I know….

What he’s saying is right.

It’d be faster to just ask, than worry about it.

But….

Ryuya: What? Are you scared?

Haruka: ….

I suppose… I am afraid.

If he were to tell me he didn’t need me….

“I have no desire to have you by my side.”

Those words he said to me last month. Every time I remember them, it feels like my heart is being torn to pieces.

Ryuya: Looks like I’m right. Well, supposing he does say he doesn't need you as a partner, I'm sure that would sting like hell….

But you've known for a long while that he couldn't care less about being an Idol, haven't you? And yet, you've been working hard all this time.

Am I wrong?

Haruka: ….

He's absolutely right.

Despite Jinguji-san not showing up for practice or even letting me hear his voice, I still pushed on.

But now....

If Jinguji-san were to say he doesn't need me, I might break.

Ryuya: So why are you losing that drive now?

Haruka: ….

I think it is because I am in love with Jinguji-san.

A one-sided romance is not a violation of school rules. So it doesn't necessarily mean that I have to give up my feelings for him.

But I can't imagine I'll be able to stop loving him now, and even if we can't be together, at the very least, I don't want him to hate me.

Ryuya: Well, you’re probably going through all this trouble because you don’t understand it yourself. Sorry about that. I’m not criticizing you or anything. Don’t take it to heart.

After that, he gently pats my head.

Haruka: Sensei….

He’s worried about me….

Oh, I’m eternally grateful!

Ryuya: Anyway, no matter how scared you are, you shouldn't avoid him. Just talk to him straight.

Haruka: I will!

I’ve made up my mind that I can’t make a decision on this without telling Jinguji-san first.

I need to face him properly sooner rather than later!

I’m ready.

The next day, I sent Jinguji-san a message.

I didn’t want anyone else to know about my studying abroad, and I figured no one would hear about it if I told him here....

But honestly, whether he would come or not was a gamble.

He still hadn't been talking to me much lately, which made it all the more uncertain....

Ren: Hey, Lady. Inviting me to a place like this is rather intense.

Jinguji-san glances around, amused.

Haruka: Jinguji-san!! I’m… glad you’re here!

Ren: It's something important, right? Ah, I also want to apologize about the other day. I took it a little too far, saying you were unneeded. I'm really sorry about that.

Haruka: No, you’re fine…. I’m the one who overstepped your boundaries….

Ren: …You kind of scared me a little. You were suddenly so straightforward and earnest….

His eyes, unlike last time, look at me kindly.

But his gaze is a bit sad.

Haruka: Jinguji-san…?

I didn't sense any of his usual enthusiasm.

Instead, he sighs and looks down.

Ren: I was just glad to hear how you felt. I appreciate your kindness. So, what can I do for you?

I wanted to talk to him about studying abroad….

But….

Haruka: Um, before that, can I ask you something?

I want to find out if he needs me as a composer, if what I'm doing is helping him.

Ren: Go ahead.

Haruka: Jinguji-san… What am I to you… Is my music….

…wanted? I can’t bring myself to say that word.

Haruka: …. …Would you miss me a little if I were to be gone?

I realized exactly what I was muttering.

Ah... Wait.

Why did I ask that? I didn't mean to….

Ren: No, not at all. We don’t have that kind of relationship.

He averts his gaze and mutters back under his breath.

Whenever I try to bridge the distance, I am confronted with merciless rejection....

He will never allow me to be by his side.

How much does he need me?

What can I do?

Haruka: I see… I guess you’re right.

Ren: …Please don’t… make that face. It troubles me when you do… You look best with a smile….

His hand, which rose for a brief moment, fell back down effortlessly, and Jinguji-san looks down again.

Select the phrase!

Jinguji-san… (+20 Love +0 Music)

I grab onto a corner of his clothes without thinking.

Ren: Lady? What’s wrong?

Haruka: Ah, I-I’m so sorry. Uh! Everything’s alright. I’m fine!

I tried my best to manage a smile, not wanting him to worry, and Jinguji-san looked a bit worried.

He then gently brings me into a hug and softly pats me twice on the back.

Ren Jinguji: It's nice to see you smile, but not when you have to force it.

He whispers in my ear and lets go of his embrace.

A fleeting touch.

But that tenderness hurt, and it almost brought me to tears.

Haruka: It’s… about me studying abroad….

I somehow manage to get the words out.

Haruka: ...I've been recommended to study abroad in America….

"It was on your brother's recommendation."

I kept that part to myself.

I feared that if I said that, it would only serve to cause Jinguji-san even more grief.

Haruka: After studying in America, I'll be able to debut as a composer….

Jinguji-san brows shoot up slightly and he brushes his hair out of his face.

Ren: Oh, that’s great to hear. I assume it's the result of your abilities being duly judged.

Jinguji-san replies with a coy smile on his face without batting an eye.

I should be happy to hear his praise, but...

It fills my heart with loneliness.

Haruka: …I am very grateful for the opportunity to debut, but I....

I want to work hard with Jinguji-san….

Is what I was about to say….

Ren: Go wherever you want to go, even if it’s the States. I have no right to stop you.

He interrupts me and I'm left speechless.

What Jinguji-san said is valid.

I have to make the decision because it is my life.

It's wrong to leave that choice to someone else.

But....

There's something that still bothers me.

Select the phrase!

I want to do debut with Jinguji-san… (+20 Love)

Haruka: If I’m to debut, I want to… I’d like to do it together with you.

Ren: Of course, as your partner, I'm delighted you feel that way. But your debut is not guaranteed if you try with me.

Now, if you study abroad, your debut will be practically confirmed at that point. Did I get it right?

Haruka: …Yes.

Ren: Say, Lady. What's your dream?

He places a hand on my shoulder and whispers in my ear.

Haruka: My dream is… to become a composer.

My voice shakes as I answer.

Then, grabbing both of my shoulders, he looks into my eyes with a serious expression.

Ren: Exactly, you’re here to become a composer. And now, they’re rolling out the red carpet for you. So why are you hesitating?

I’ve told you before, haven’t I? You’re destined for this. You should think about that.

With those words, he lets go of his grip.

Ren: Is that all you wanted to talk about? Then I’ll get going now. I have somewhere I need to be after this.

Haruka: Yes… Thank you.

So… that was it?

My absence didn't seem like a big deal to him.

Ren: Well, I’ll see you around.

Flashing his usual smile, he raises a hand and walks away.

I wish Jinguji-san would have stopped me.

It was a thought I had entertained somewhere in the back of my mind.

I was naive enough to think that I would give up the idea of studying abroad if he did so.

I had hoped Jinguji-san would make the decision for me, even though it was only for me to make.

This is my life after all.

I've relied far too much on Jinguji-san just because he was my partner.

Let's rethink this.

What is best for me and for Jinguji-san?

And above all.

What do I want to do?

It’s been a few days since I last went over everything with Jinguji-san.

I still couldn’t decide on an answer.

I definitely think that studying abroad would be better for me in the long run.

But I don't want to leave Jinguji-san's talent untapped.

By coming to this academy and meeting him, I have found a new dream.

I want him to sing with his heart.

And I want to share that song with the world.

But...

It's nothing more than my own selfish dream.

I'm just forcing him to become someone he's made clear he doesn't want to be....

Tokiya: So, I heard the news, Nanami-kun. It sounds like you’re going to study abroad.

In the classroom, Ichinose-san approaches while I’m lost in my thoughts.

Haruka: Ah… Yeah. I was invited to study abroad and pursue a more advanced study of music.

The truth is, I haven't formally replied yet, but for some reason, the proposal is continuing to move forward, and it's hard to say no....

But then again...

I wonder how he possibly could have heard about it, I've been trying to keep this a secret for as long as possible....

I guess I can't keep it to myself forever.

Syo: Seriously?! How come I didn’t know about this? And Ren…? What do you think?

Ren: It doesn’t matter to me… It’s her life. It's up to her what she wants to do, right? Who am I to interfere with that?

His cold words stung a bit.

Syo: Oh, come on. You’re so mean! You should be trying to stop her!

Syo-kun retorts, looking annoyed.

Tokiya: Syo…. They are entitled to think what they want. It's not something for others to meddle in.

Ichinose-san calmly reminds him.

Syo: Yeah, I guess I see your point… It’s just kind of sad. Let’s all at least throw her a huge going away party!

Haruka: Thank you.

It made me happy to know he’d miss me.

But... seeing as the offer has gone ahead and my classmates are even aware of it...

There is no turning back now.

If they took my silence for confirmation, I can't refuse them at this point.

I will soon have to part ways with Jinguji-san....

Then I have to at least finish the song before that.

This is my unrequited love.

My final selfish act.

I'll write a song for the graduation audition, hand it to Jinguji-san, and then wish him farewell with a smile.

Then, in a matter of what seemed like seconds, things moved quickly, and it was decided I would leave the day after Christmas.

So that I could leave with no regrets.

I poured my everything into this.

All of the love I carry... every single bit of it, I put it all into this song.

I weave a melody straight from the heart.

And then, I carefully arrange the melodies one by one.

And finally....

Haruka: …It’s done.

On the day before the dance party, I finally managed to end up with something I was happy with.

I leave the day after tomorrow....

It came down to the wire, but....

Even so, I'm thankful it's done.

Haruka: I hope he listens to it….

Preferably, I want him to listen to it right now, in front of me.

He's a busy guy, so it's unlikely he'll show up on such short notice.

Still....

I really wanted him to listen, so I sent him a message.

“The song is ready. Please give it a listen. I'll be waiting for you in the recording studio.”

Haruka: …I wonder… if he’s coming….

An hour has passed since I sent the message.

I just sat in the recording studio looking out over the booth, unable to motivate myself to do anything.

Ren: Hey, Lady. I heard you finished the song?

Haruka: I did!

He really came….

What should I do? I'm over the moon.

Haruka: Um… Thank you so much!

Ren: You’re… thanking me? That should be my line. This is the song for the graduation audition, right?

Jinguji-san gives a genuine smile, looking really happy.

Up until July, he never really showed any interest in music or singing.

If anything, it almost seemed more like a chore to him than anything.

But during summer break, little by little, he started to look more interested.

Whenever I composed a new song, he would enjoy listening to it, and even sometimes share some advice on how I could improve it.

Before the school festival, he was having a lot of fun with it, and I wish we could have kept writing music together like that.

But those fun times came to an end with the school festival.

I hurt him by going too far.

I believed he hated me already.

But my songs....

He didn’t hate it.

I could tell just by looking at his eyes.

Jinguji-san still loves music even now!

Ren: You've probably been swamped preparing to study abroad. Do you mind if I take a listen?

Haruka: O-Of course! I’ll play it now!

And so, I played the newly completed song.

I wonder what he thinks....

From the start until the end, Jinguji-san listens to the song intently.

I hope he likes it.

After the song ends, he parts his lips to speak.

Ren: … I see. Not bad.

Haruka: So… d-does that mean you’ll sing it at the graduation audition?

Ren: Naturally…. I am the only person in this world who can perfectly handle performing this song.

He replies with a wink.

Haruka: Thank you!!!

He likes it….

I’m so glad….

But, in the next moment, his face clouds over.

Ren: …You’re leaving the day after tomorrow, right?

Haruka: …Yes.

We'll have to part ways in two days' time.

Thinking about it makes my heart ache.

We won't... be able to see each other anymore....

I will no longer be able to have him smile at me like this or listen to my songs.

Ren: You don’t look too excited….

Jinguji-san walks up next to me and brushes my bangs aside.

Ren: You were having doubts about studying abroad a little while ago, right? Is it because you were worried about not knowing the language? Or maybe you lack confidence in your own talent? Or perhaps....

He trails off, biting his bottom lip.

Ren: No… Nevermind. Anyway, this is a huge opportunity for you. Do your best out there. I have high hopes for you.

Using the hand that had brushed back my bangs, he lightly caresses my cheek and flashes a kind smile.

Haruka: …I will.

Jinguji-san is sincerely cheering me on.

I want to meet his expectations….

Ren: Ah, right. The dance party is tomorrow, may I escort you to the dance?

Haruka: Oh! Are… Are you sure?! I-I’m really glad… but…. Are you sure you want to go with me?

Ren: Of course, tomorrow is the end….

The end….

Those words pierce my heart.

Ringo: Ah, there you are…. Phew, I'm glad you're still here. Hurry back, everyone is waiting.

Ren: Waiting…? Didn't we already wrap up the interview a while ago? I made sure to check with the director.

Ringo: It seems there was one thing they missed, so it should only take a second.

Ren: I see, if that’s the case, then fine. Well then, Lady, I’ll be seeing you tomorrow.

With a wink, Jinguji-san leaves the recording studio.

Ringo: Thank goodness… What a relief. Looks like everything will work out in the end. I got so worried about what I was going to do when my cell wasn't getting through.

Haruka: U-Um… About Jinguji-san’s interview….

Ringo: Oh, it's for the Jinguji conglomerate. It happens from time to time. That kid is really liked among the bigwigs because of his good looks and great way with words.

He's often sent out whenever there's a special feature on the wealthy. He's usually really good about standing by for a while after the interview is over....

This time, though, he wanted to finish early for some reason.... He didn't even wait for them to check over the footage, he just asked the director if it was okay to go....

Haruka: Oh… I see….

Jinguji-san.

Despite being so busy, he made sure to come….

Ringo: But I’m glad to still see your face around campus. Well, I have to go now too. I’ll catch you later, Haru-chan.

Haruka: Of course. Thank you.

What am I going to do with myself…? I'm so happy.

He came in spite of his busy schedule....

He didn't even look annoyed at me for sending a message on such short notice....

He hurried as soon as he was done to listen to my song....

Tomorrow will be the end.

I poured all of my feelings into this song.

And even now, I feel my love for him about to overflow.

I didn't want to leave, my heart felt like it was going to weep.

And then, the next day.

Tomochika: Alright! You’re perfect. I think I did pretty good if I do say so myself.

Tomo-chan helped me dress and apply my makeup before the dance party.

Haruka: T-Thank you. I’m sorry for leaving you with all the work. You’re still not even ready.

Tomochika: Oh, I don't mind at all, I can get myself ready in 10 minutes. And besides, I actually enjoy doing makeup for others.

It's fun to be able to see things objectively and, with my own hands, watch it all come together to form something pretty.

It's practically a hobby, and I like doing it, so don't worry about it.

Haruka: …Thank you.

Tomochika: Anyway, I’m glad to hear you’re going to be studying abroad.

Haruka: …Yeah. It’s a great opportunity….

Tomochika: You don’t look too happy about it…. Well, you can do whatever you want with your life but... If it gets tough, you know I'm always here for you.

Just make sure you have no regrets!

We're friends no matter where you go. You can talk to me anytime. And... I'll make sure to keep your space here ready for you if you ever decide to come back.

Speaking, she gestures to my bed.

Haruka: …Thank you.

Ren: Lady, are you in?

Haruka: Ah, yes.

Tomochika: Looks like your partner’s here…. Perfect timing. I’ll be leaving soon too, so you go on ahead.

Haruka: …T-Thank you.

Ren: You look absolutely beautiful in that dress. The lace stands out perfectly against your fair skin. You look like a princess straight out of a fairy tale.

Haruka: Uh… I… I don’t…. T-Thank you.

Ren: I'll be with you for the entire evening.

Haruka: Huh... With me? But, the other girls….

I thought he'd at least be dancing with the girls....

But Jinguji-san just grins and without another word, we start walking.

Huh…?

Isn’t the party hall over there?

Haruka: W-Wait… The party hall….

Ren: We’ll be here tonight.

Haruka: ???

And then, we arrive….

Ballroom music plays in an empty auditorium.

Haruka: There’s… no one here. I knew the party hall was in the other direction….

Ren: No, this is the right place. I don't want anyone disturbing us, at least this one last time. Come on, let's dance.

Jinguji-san takes my hand and we start dancing.

Haruka: Um, y-you know, I’m not really… good at dancing….

Ren: Then allow me just one song. Don’t worry, I’ll lead you along well.

He winks and begins to take steps forward.

He skillfully moves his arms and hips to lead the dance, not minding my clumsy gait.

Jinguji-san was so good at leading that although I was hardly moving on my own, I almost believed I was dancing magnificently.

...This is it.

This is the final night I can call myself Jinguji-san's partner.

With a heavy heart, I still found myself able to be happy dancing together with him.

When the dance ends, Jinguji-san holds my hand and escorts me to the center of the stage.

A small table and two chairs were placed there with food, cake, and wine glasses arranged on the table.

Ren: It's not much, but I prepared a cake and some drinks. No champagne, of course.

He speaks up with a soft smile.

Ren: I thought about reserving a restaurant… or something like that… but I figured you wouldn’t be too happy with that…. So….

I put it all together myself. I didn't rely on using my family's wealth, but instead, I did everything from scratch.

Haruka: Um….

Ren: It’s not really something I’m used to doing. The cake turned out looking a bit funny.

Haruka: You made all of this yourself!? That’s amazing… I don’t know what to say, that makes me so happy to hear….

What should I do?

I feel like I'm going to cry….

Everything is handmade…. I’m so overjoyed that Jinguji-san went through such lengths for me that I didn't know what to do with myself.

Ren: I had watched the chef make it and thought it would be easy for me to do myself. Well, I ended up making a mess with the whipped cream flying all over the room.

I ended up just leaving it as it was, and I'm sure Hijirikawa will complain about it later. But, like I care.

Finishing that thought, he suddenly smiles.

Ren: Now, the taste may not wow you… but since I followed the recipe, it should still be pretty good, don’t you think?

Haruka: I don't even know how I can possibly repay you for treating me so kindly. Ah, I should have also prepared something for you.

Ren: Lady, you don't have to worry about a thing. We're celebrating you studying abroad tonight. Please, go on, have a seat.

He smoothly pulls out a chair and, with a practiced hand, helps me sit.

Haruka: Ah, s-sorry.

Ren: There’s no need to be so nervous, I want you to relax.

Haruka: Ah, a-alright. I’ll do my best!

Re Jinguji: Come on, relax, relax.

He lighty pats me on the shoulder and smiles.

As he gazes at me tenderly, I naturally begin to break out into a smile.

Ren: Yes, there we go. That smile. I hope it remains that way always. Tonight's a special occasion, after all.

A glass of a richly hued grape juice is poured and a plate of cake and chicken is served.

Haruka: I-It’s alright, I can serve myself.

Feeling grateful, every time I try to do something....

Ren: Not today… Allow me to do this for you.

Jinguji-san kindly assures me, and I end up leaving everything in his capable hands.

This is the first time in my life I've experienced something like this….

I've never had someone handle everything for me this way before.

I wonder if… this is really okay?

It feels like a scene straight out of a drama, and my heart begins to race.

Ren: Here’s to your new beginning… Cheers.

The sound of our clinking glasses resonates throughout the spacious hall.

Haruka: Thank you very much.

Ren: Now, go ahead and eat….

Haruka: Alright.

Jinguji-san watches me with a smile on his face as I bring the food to my mouth.

Haruka: Ah… It’s delicious….

Ren: That’s good to hear. I hardly ever cook, so I was a little worried how it’d turn out.

Haruka: No way, it's super tasty! I'm very grateful that you made this for me….

Ren: It's worth all the hard work to hear you say that. It's very rewarding to know when someone is happy as a result of something you created yourself. Oh, and by the way....

Jinguji-san stands and comes up behind me.

Ren: Stay still for a moment….

He brushes my hair aside, brings his hands around my neck and places something on it.

Is this… a necklace…?

Ren: There, that’s better. You look lovely, my Lady.

He kisses the pendant at the end of the necklace and smiles.

Ren: I actually also handmade this myself. I was looking through some jewelry during the school festival and thought maybe I could do it myself instead of buying something that already existed.

I gave it a try and it turned out to be surprisingly easy. That is the first piece I ever made... Do you like it?

Haruka: I-I do. I’ve never seen anything so wonderful!

Ren: Then, will you cherish it forever?

Haruka: Uh… W-Well….

Ren: It’s already yours. There’s no one better suited for it than you.

Haruka: Thank you so much!

Ren: You’re very welcome… Ah, look, you’ve stopped eating. Go on, your food will get cold.

Haruka: R-Right.

Every time Jinguji-san flashes me a kind smile, tears threaten to well up in my eyes.

But if I cried now, surely I….

I don't want to leave, I want to stay by your side.

I love you.

...Is what I'd like to say....

But I knew I couldn't do that.

So, I held back my tears.

Ren: …Oh, it’s gotten quite late…. There’s actually one more gift I have for you.

Haruka: Please, I’ve already received plenty. This is too much. I already don’t know what to do….

Just celebrating with you like this fills me with so much joy! I can't imagine anything better….

Ren: My lady…. Don’t hold back. Today, I want you to leave everything to me.

Haruka: Ah… Is that….

Ren: Yes, this is your final gift!

Jinguji-san swiftly pulls out his saxophone from under the table, hiding behind the tablecloth.

He’s going to play… for me.

…I’m so happy!

Ren: I knew it.... You love music better than any costly item. You look absolutely delighted right now.

Then, with the saxophone in his hands, Jinguji-san wears the most serene and tender smile I've ever seen.

Haruka: Ah… Yes. I love your saxophone playing, Jinguji-san, so I'm honored I get to be able to listen to it.

I really don’t know what to say. This will become a very treasured memory. Thank you so much.

Ren: Good. I dedicate this music to you!

With a determined look on his face, he breathes in, grins, and begins to play on his saxophone.

He was just as incredible the last time I heard him perform, but....

His technical skills are in a completely different league.

I always considered Jinguji-san to have a superb ear for music, and his ability to draw people in was remarkable.

While gazing at him, transfixed, our eyes suddenly locked.

Then, Jinguji-san smiles and winks at me.

Ah!

He's so cool!

He now plays with an even greater range of expression, making his performance on par with that of professionals.

If music were to be compared to writing, technique would be language.

If someone with a natural talent for writing learns many words, the number of ways in which they can express themselves will increase dramatically.

Even if they want to convey something as universal as "love", the more words available to them, the more impactful their message will be....

His performance is splendidly majestic.

It is passionate, yet delicate in its delivery.

Just listening to it, my heart trembles, and tears well up in my eyes.

I was so absorbed in applauding that I forgot to wipe away the tears that were falling down my face.

As I continue to clap, Jinguji-san gives a wry smile, sets down his saxophone, and approaches me.

Ren: Was it good enough to make you cry?

He gently wipes away my tears with his fingers.

Haruka: Yes… It was… very touching…. I’m so happy….

My tears continue despite his best efforts to wipe them away.

Ren: I didn’t mean to make you cry, but if they’re tears of joy, I can live with it….

I guess all that practice paid off a little. Oh, and I also wrote some lyrics for your song, even though it's not quite finished yet.

Jinguji-san opens a notebook and hands it over to me.

The moment I see the words written on the page of the notebook, the melody of the song I composed comes to mind and Jinguji's voice plays in my head.

It's only an imagining, of course.... But, it's so cool, and I want to hear the song as soon as possible.

Haruka: Um… Could I… listen to you singing this?

Ren: I'm afraid I can't do that. The lyrics aren't even complete yet. I would like to work on it some more.

Besides, I need more practice. I can't let you hear it when it's still incomplete.

Saying that, he takes the notebook from my hand.

Right....

Of course. I also wouldn't want to show off a song that was unpolished….

But it’s really a shame….

Ren: You really wanted to listen, huh?

Haruka: Yes… but I’ll deal with it. Oh… the graduation audition!

I will make sure to return on the day of the graduation audition. So… please let me hear it then. Um… I’ll be looking forward to it….

I want to listen to it soon so badly.

I want to create a song with him.

But we are unable to stay together.

If I were to cancel my plans to study abroad now, it would only cause trouble for Jinguji-san's brother....

I never did end up telling him that his brother is the one who made this study abroad possible but....

Inconveniencing his brother would ultimately be the same as inconveniencing Jinguji-san....

I want to stay here.

I want to remain by his side forever.

Biting back the words that nearly slipped from my mouth, I tightly clench my fists.

Haruka: I will continue to support you no matter how far away we are from each other.

I truly believe that you will become a wonderful idol.... I'm sorry I couldn't be with you until the end.

But with your talent, you'll be able to debut even without me around.... Ah, but wait, that's right....

You... don't even want to become an idol.... You never need me to begin with….

Huh? That’s strange….

I didn’t mean to say any of that….

What should I do….

I can’t control myself….

If I let myself continue like this, I might end up saying things I shouldn't….

Haruka: Uh… so that’s why… I’m sorry. I’ll be going now.

I find myself starting to run away.

But....

His hand quickly shoots out and grabs onto my arm.

Ren: Don’t go!

Haruka: What…?

Before I can react, he pulls me into an embrace.

Jinguji-san's fingers bury themselves in my hair as he hugs me, so tightly that it hurts.

Haruka: U-Um… I….

Ren: Today is not over yet!

Jinguji-san raises his voice. As I tremble under the fierceness in his voice, he loosens his hold and gently strokes my hair.

Ren: I give up. I wanted to see you off smoothly... but you... the look that you have on your face….

His voice quivers, hugging me tightly again.

Ren: I don’t want to let you go….

Jinguji-san mutters in a voice so small I thought I’d imagine it.

Haruka: I… don’t want to go. I want to stay by your side forever. But I'll be causing problems if I don't leave, so…

Ren: That’s not true. I need your song…. Is that selfish of me?

Haruka: That… I'm so happy to hear you say that. But….

Now that the offer has gotten this far, I feel it would be rather disruptive to turn it down now.

Besides... Jinguji-san's brother is the one who recommended that I study abroad....

Haruka: ...Your brother recommended that I study abroad. To refuse now would be…

Jinguji-san's shapely eyebrows twitch.

Ren: It was my brother…? If I had known that, I would have never supported this in the first place....

He must be trying to use you for something absolutely idiotic. That man wouldn't have suggested you study abroad otherwise....

He tightly bites his bottom lip.

Haruka: But… studying abroad… Jinguji-san… You said it was fine.

Ren Jinguji: I won’t let you go!

He tightens his hold on me.

Ren: This is your future we're talking about. I don't care if my brother is involved, as long as it's really for your benefit. But there's no way to be sure. Besides....

Haruka: Jinguji-san….

I murmur softly and glance up at his face.

He then places a kiss on my forehead before letting go of his embrace.

Ren: Sorry… This isn't like me. It seems I got caught up in the spirit of Christmas Eve and got a little emotional....

But... I still don't want to let you go. At first, I genuinely believed it would be better for you if you studied abroad.

I thought it would help you release the music I was so captivated by out into the world as quickly as possible.... But it seems I was wrong.

It was a new chapter in your life, but you were on the verge of tears the entire time. I can't allow a woman with such a look on her face to leave.

You have something more important on your mind than making your debut. Tell me, what is your real dream....

My real dream….

Haruka: …I want to…. I want to make a song with you. I want to….

I want to properly get through the graduation audition. I want us to work hard together. I want to… aim for our victory….

Holding back tears, I finally confess my honest feelings.

Ren: Alright lady, I'll make sure that dream of yours comes true. I swear on this night, I will.

Haruka: T-Thank you….

Ren: I won't let you cry alone. If you're going to, do it in my arms.... Okay?

Gently, he pulls me closer to him and guides my face to rest on his chest.

Haruka: …Okay.

And so, Jinguji-san gently caresses my back until I stop crying.

He told me not to go.

He needed me.

And that made me happy….

The very thought of ever leaving him completely vanishes.

The next day.

Haruka: Please accept my most sincere apology!!

I stand in the principal's office and bow my head.

Despite the fact I had never given them a formal reply, they had already started making arrangements for me to study abroad.

And they canceled it on the day of my departure.

I can't think of anything more tremendously inconvenient than that.

Haruka: It was very last-minute…. I caused trouble for so many people….

Ryuya: To be fair, they had already made their moves before you even had a chance to give them a proper response….

When it comes down to it, it’s better than getting on that plane only for you to have to come back later.

Shining Saotome: Hahaha!! Well, we somehow managed to salvage the situation! Shining’s political power is invincible!

Haruka: T-Thank you very much!

Sensei….

Shining Saotome: In return, give it your all and do your best!

Haruka: Absolutely! I will try my hardest!

Ryuya: Oh, and I'll let them know, so you don't have to worry about it.

Harukai: Hyuga-sensei… Thank you so much!!!

And so, I canceled my study abroad.

I caused trouble in many different ways, but even so, I decided to take a stand and give it my all.

Haruka: Ah, Jinguji-san. Did you wait for me?

Ren: Well, yeah. It seems like things went well from the looks of it. Now then, shall we go? I've reserved a recording studio for us.

Haruka: Thank you!

Starting today, I’ll work hard together with Jinguji-san!

And together, we will win the graduation audition.

Without fail….

Mini Game

Ryuya: Hey, Nanami. Sorry for calling you out here. But, here's the thing. I'd like to ask for your opinion as a composer.

There's an unfinished set of lyrics that a student of mine wrote, and he’s still struggling with a few parts.

When you think about putting a melody to it, as a composer, which phrases would you choose? I'd like you to choose from among these options.

Just think of it the same way you did the previous lyric test. But since the lyrics are not yet set in stone, it's not like there is a clear-cut right answer.

If I had to say, it would be about how well it might resonate with him… or something like that. You know what, nevermind.

Are you ready? We’re about to start.

The next day, I show Jinguji-san the lyrics I had written.

Ren: I knew I could create this with you. My own personal music. I'm sorry for stopping you. But I have no regrets. Let's debut together.

Haruka: Yes! I have no doubt in my mind that we will definitely debut!

I won’t be sparing any effort.

I will do whatever it takes.

Chapter End

#ren jinguji #ren repeat #utapri

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