#but it just wasn’t scary enough which is a problem for a horror movie

[theyhadlightinsidetheireyes]

watching last voyage of the Demeter in the cinema like “I have a unique connection to a 1897 classical novel that nobody in this cinema understands. Only I truly know these characters, they are my buddies, my pals, they are my homeboys , my rotten soldiers... oh wait, they invented a new viewpoint character for the movie”

[aka-indulgence]

Sleeping in the car

Hey, excuse my AWOL, but would you like a random comfort/fluff drabble?

(Sans/Reader, Papyrus is also there)

You’re going home in a car at night after a scary movie, and the ASMR skeleton brother noises is effectively putting you to sleep.

---

The car jumps a little, running over a speed bump, waking you a little.

“I MEAN, WHY DIDN’T THEY CALL THE POLICE? I MEAN DON’T HOUSES USUALLY HAVE TELEPHONES? THEY HAD TIME TO GET TO IT BEFORE THE KILLER BROKE IN. I MEAN THAT HOUSE PROBABLY HAS 20 LOCKS IN IT!”

“modern problems? most homes don’t have landlines anymore. everyone’s got smart phones.”

“THEY SHOWED ONE IN THE SCENE BEFORE! AND BESIDES, THEY DID HAVE SMART PHONES.”

“it was dead?”

“A CONTRIVED PLOT POINT. I KNOW PHONES CAN BE TROUBLESOME BUT IT SHOULDN’T HAVE BEEN DEAD BY THEN. IT’S SO ANNOYING!”

Sans shrugged. “i dunno. i liked it. undyne seems to like it too.”

“SHE DID SEEM ENTHUSED WITH THE ON-SCREEN VIOLENCE…”

“plus, isn’t it nice to see snow wolf make it big on the silver screen? he’s killing it in horror and thriller.”

“YE- ….” You can see Papyrus squinting through the rearview mirror. “IF IT WASN’T FOR OUR DEAR HUMAN, I WOULD’VE STEPPED ON THE BRAKES.”

“No no, you should’ve, it would’ve been funny.”

You were invited to watch a movie with the skeletons and the cute couple, but you’d neglected to ask about the movie. When you found out it was a slasher, you foolishly overestimated your fear tolerance, brushing off the concern from your boyfriend. Especially with Undyne’s explosive encouragement, you really did feel like you wouldn’t be scared of a little fake stabbing.

However… it was more suspenseful than your liking. Your knuckles were practically white, gripping onto Sans’ arm while you watched the killer’s shadow move around in the dark. You hated the jumpscares, they always got to you- it’s probably not even that scary but it felt like your soul was fighting to escape your body every time it happened. The concerned looks you got from Sans and Papyrus was very sweet and let you keep up your ‘it’s ok, I’m totally not phased’ lie, but by the end you were practically death-gripping Sans.

You felt so weak walking out of the theater, giving a shaky thumbs up to Undyne, getting some comfort seeing that Alphys seemed quite shaken as well. As soon as you got to the car, you think the terror had taken up enough energy that you were falling asleep as Papyrus pulled out of the parking lot.

You woke up in the middle of Papyrus’ rant, blanketed under Sans’ jacket with a crick in your neck.

“YOU’VE BEEN AWAKE THIS WHOLE TIME?” Papyrus’ brows shoot up. “OR DID MY VOICE WAKE YOU? I’M SORRY-“

“No no, don’t be.” You yawned. “I’m used to your voice, I just got a little cold,”

Sans puts an arm around your shoulders. “jacket not warm enough? you need a warm hug too?” He gives you his best impression of the pleading face emoji, which looks so ridiculous that it startles a laugh out of you.

“I mean. That sounds nice,” you agreed, snuggling into him a little. He really was warmer. It was even better when he pecked your cheek.

“I’LL TURN DOWN THE AC,” Papyrus says as he does just that. “BETTER?”

“Mmm.”

You’re already feeling your eyelids droop again as you lean your head on Sans’ shoulders.

“movie scared the lights out of you huh? need a non-scary nap?”

“No… no ‘m fine…” you reply, even as you feel your eyelids droop further. “Continue, Papyrus. What did you think about the scene in the pool?”

“OH, I ACTUALLY LIKE THAT ONE. THEY KIND OF SUBVERTED THE TROPE OF ‘IDIOT HORROR CHARACTERS’ WHILE STILL… DOING IT? AS SOON AS HE WENT OUT AND SAW THE BODIES IN THE WATER, THAT ACTUALLY GAVE ME A SENSE OF DREAD! AND THEN IT BECOMES A SLAPSTICK COMEDY AS SOON AS HE SEES THE KILLER.”

“maybe you just have a high tolerance to horror. my darling human here,” Sans patted your arm, “was trying to choke me like how sharp-tooth choked billy in the movie.”

You sat up a little. “Was it that bad? I’m sorry,”

“nah nah, i’m pulling your leg- put your head back,” Sans said with a little urgency pulling you back onto his shoulder. Like how a mom would to their sleepy child.

“OH REALLY? I THOUGHT YOU DID WONDERFULLY, HUMAN. YOU WERE BRAVE TO HAVE ENDURED THAT HORROR SHOW!”

“i thought you said it wasn’t scary.”

“IT WAS SCARY HOW BAD IT WAS! I SURE HOPE SNOW WOLF WOULD GET MORE SOPHISTICATED MOVIES IN THE FUTURE. MAYBE A PSYCHOLOGICAL HORROR? THOSE ARE GOOD.”

“I… might need a while before I watch another scary movie.” You laugh tiredly. “I think I’m going to think about the teeth on the… neck…”

You shiver.

“For a while.”

“you’re falling asleep again,” Sans pointed out.

“No… mm…”

Sans’ t-shirt smelled like comfort. So did his jacket. Especially now that you were warmer, you felt… hmm…

“HUMAN, WE’RE NOT GOING TO BE OFFENDED IF YOU’RE SCARED OF SCARY MOVIES OR SLEEPY AT… OH IT’S ALMOST MIDNIGHT.”

“I’ve slept later…!” you object, even as your eyes fall shut.

“yeah, but right now you’re tired, sleepyhead.”

You could only muster a small grumble.

“… don’t worry, i’ll keep you safe from the night terrors.”

You could feel him rubbing your hand with his thumb.

“OH, WE COULD HAVE A LITTLE SLEEPOVER IN THE LIVING ROOM IF THAT’LL MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER?”

…

“they’re smiling, i think that’s a yes.”

[dayspreceding]

The Thing (2011)

Spoiler Warning

Ok Near as I can tell, this movie is not very well liked by most people, and I can definitely understand why. I watched it a couple of nights ago and frankly I wasn’t taking notes, so we’re going off my memory here.

A lot of the complaints I’ve seen about this movie are about it relying on CGI over practical effects, which is a dumb thing to complain about in my opinion. If you want to be upset because the CGI wasn’t “good enough”, that’s one thing, but CGI and Practical effects are TOOLS, there are pros and cons to both, and if you can’t get a practical effects team to provide the quality you’re looking for, there’s nothing wrong with using CGI. That said, I really enjoyed the CGI in this prequel, though maybe they went a little overboard with the Thing’s abilities. In the prequel, literally moments after waking up, the creature is strong enough to LEAP through a ceiling, destroy it, and keep on moving. In the Russell Thing, the creature had a feeling of NEEDING to be stealthy because it was gathering strength, so a lot of the movie felt justified. In the prequel, its practically unstoppable in how strong it is, to the point that I kept asking myself why it didn’t just start attacking people outright. I have a theory about that, but I’ll get to it shortly, The Thing is frustratingly inconsistent, ranging from WILDLY short-sighted to near genius mastermind in its deception and behavior, and there’s never an explanation given for it. It lays traps, misdirects, and deceives effortlessly, but then seemingly gives up on all of that to try and kill someone for no reason, to the point where its VERY clear sometimes its attacking just because the PLOT demands something happen, even if it makes no sense. What comes to mind very specifically is the the helicopter scene, where it is comforting an injured person who in no way suspects him, and then LITERALLY the next second, attacks and destroys the chopper...for NO reason. It then goes on to mirror the pilot, Budget Russell, and spend the rest of the movie ACTIVELY hurting its own plans and efforts, before being surprise revealed to have been a creature the whole time. There’s no build up to this, the way Kate realizes this is never highlighted or discussed...it just...happens, because she needs to disappear in the snowfield near the ship. I like the movie...but it does have problems that could have easily been avoided with a few more writing changes. From what I’ve come to understand, this movie does suffer from some studio interference, but I don’t really know where this starts and ends, so its a meh quality movie for what feels like no reason. All of this though, does bring me to the ultimate reason I’m writing this. The creature itself. The Russell Thing is given no real explanation, very few details to really make it make sense in the context of the universe. Everything we see and hear about it ‘kinda’ makes sense, and that’s excellent for a horror monster.  Understanding things makes them less scary, which undercuts the movie, however...we do get some clues. It operates like a virus, corrupting on a cellular level.  It is actively trying to get out of the Antarctic, and doesn’t really seem to need to ‘eat’ in a way we would describe it. The prequel builds on these qualities, and it feels like it adds more information as well. In the prequel, the creature is actively trying to reach its ship, a seemingly undamaged, flightworthy vehicle that ‘crashed’ on earth over 100,000 years ago. That None of that makes sense. Why is the creature’s behavior so inconsistent? How did it crash without damaging its ship? Why does it entirely abandon the task of escaping to chase Kate when it could have just sent a part of itself out to get her? Why doesn’t Budget Russell (I genuinely can’t remember his name) just betray her when he’s saving her? The answer is obviously plot holes, but for the sake of brevity, lets follow this line of logic. All of our evidence points to a single idea for me, and that is that the creature ISN’T the alien that landed here. Its the virus that infected it. The creature being a virus, rather than the alien, makes a lot of sense and explains a LOT about the weird choices it makes. -Mutagenic properties that extend to corrupting even DNA -Erratic Behavior -Fear of Fire regardless of form -Compulsion to spread The only thing that’s inconsistent with this is how it actually performs the mimicry, with it sometimes incubating a clone inside of itself over a long period of time, to it seemingly changing people cell by cell over a RAPID period of time, but even that could be explained by the virus becoming familiar with human DNA and getting faster because of it. That also explains why it took so long to appear as a dog in the prequel, the original virus that infected the dog wasn’t accustomed to its DNA and needed longer to change. The reason the alien LANDED here on earth was most likely to avoid spreading the infection among its species. Earth at that time wouldn’t have had any intelligent life worth mentioning, so leaving an infection here wouldn’t have impacted any societies, and landing in the most remote possible location would only act as an extra layer of security. The alien tried to save its people as it was dying, and I’d argue that if we got to explore the ship, we’d probably see more of its kind, dead or transformed throughout the ship. So in conclusion, the alien rocks, humans are paranoid and foolish, and writers don’t work well with studios sticking their fingers in the pie.

[eddieslittlefreak]

you belong with me - steddie ff.

summary: steve thinks eddie and chrissy has a thing going on, and chrissy just doesn’t seem to get it why steve dislikes her, so she finally asks it.

note: steve has an ultimate teenage-girl-crush here on eddie, let’s be real lmao<3 it’s quite a short one, but my bigger project called ‘you got the cinema’ is coming soon, get ready xx

 Rumor had it that Eddie and Chrissy had stuff going on and it made Steve freak out. It’s not that he hated Chrissy or anything.. at least until this rumor popped up, because now Steve Harrington was downhill on the way of going to heaven. He just couldn’t stand being around Chrissy anymore and the poor girl didn’t understand why. They always been some kind of friends. Not the ones who you can call in the middle of the night because you wanna go out to a car ride and eat junk food, but definitely someone who you could count on and eat M&M’s with in the parking lot after school. Steve felt awful about the sudden wave of disliking Chrissy, but at this point he needed to admit that he was head over heels for Eddie who had been hanging out with her a lot lately. Chrissy had a boyfriend, Jason. But holy shit, this didn’t calm Steve down. He was even thinking about mentioning this to Jason before, but he immediately got rid of this idea. Long story short, Steve was jealous and Chrissy was kind of sad, because lately he always turned off her offers to hang out. 

“Later maybe you could come over. We could watch some horror movies? Maybe the ones that make you jump so I can have a good laugh.” Eddie offered to Steve, who was rolling his eyes.

“That was one time.. alright, around four, but those were pretty scary movies okay?” Eddie pretended to agree so he could save Steve’s ego a bit. “But I’m totally in. Only if I don’t need to drive home afterwards. I hate night driving.” 

“That’s why I always drive when we go out after midnight.” yeah, Eddie was that kind of friend to Steve. Maybe those late night car rides were the reason why Steve started to like Eddie more than just a friend. A little bit more than a friend, but even more desperately and eagerly. Or maybe it was how Eddie always sat so close to Steve while watching the movies, or the way he always shared his food with him, the way his fingers got lost so easily in Steve’s perfectly styled hair or..

The thing was that Steve might have been crushing on him for such a long time, he wasn’t even sure what made it happen. But oh, he was sure in one thing; that jealousy can turn you into a bitch sometimes.

“Hey guys.” Chrissy showed up next to them and it made Steve tense up. “Sick shirt, Eddie, where did you get it?” she smiled and made sure to turn to Steve to as well, but she only got a blank face from him which kinda.. well made her sad, actually.

“I brought it in the mall the other day, it’s cool, ain’t it?” he bragged about it with a proud grin.

“Yeah, so cool..” Steve was murmuring it under his nose, so Chrissy decided that it was on time.

“Steve, could we talk? Please? It’s important.” Steve looked at her with not much excitement, but he didn’t want Eddie to question what was all of this fuss about from his side towards Chrissy.

“Sure.” he nodded. “Later, Eds.”

“See ya.” he smiled then turned to walk away, leaving Steve and Chrissy alone.

“Maybe we could talk in the parking lot? Our spot?” she tried again, her tone is still warm, but Steve was as cold as an iceberg. He just started to walk towards their spot. Inside he was feeling like shit, because Chrissy genuinely tried to be nice to him, she didn’t have a problem with Steve. She liked him and hoped to be closer friends with him, but she had enough of Steve completely ignoring her existence, or when time to time he when he doesn’t ignored her, then having fun hating her. 

As they arrived to that one specific part of the parkling lot, Chrissy turned to Steve.

“Okay. Talk.” she said, making Steve furrow his eyebrow.

“Excuse me?” he said, his voice surprised as he looked at her.

“What’s wrong, Steve?” Chrissy sighed. “We used to be friends. I would have even loved to get to know you better, you’re a nice guy. But lately you always avoiding me, you look at me like your worst enemy, you don’t even say “hi” anymore. Why? Did I do something wrong?” yeah, that stabbed Steve right in the heart.

“No, it’s not that..” he said, talking like a toddler who had been deeply offended.

“Then what? Steve, tell me, please. I want this to work out. I miss you, alright? I miss our little afternoon hanging outs, and you talking about the guys. Your little babysitting club.” she said with a small chuckle. “We were going so good, I even got to know Eddie, because I know you two are close.” Steve bit his lip and Chrissy looked at him in wonder, than in the shock of realization. “Oh my God.” she said with a surprised smile. “Is it because of Eddie?” Steve avoided her gaze. “Is it because people saying we’re going out?”

“People been talking lately and.. you know.” Steve spoke softly, unsure of what to say.

“Steve..” Chrissy smiled. “There is absolutely nothing between me and Eddie. Even if I wasn’t dating Jason, it wouldn’t change a thing. Almost all of our talking subjects are about you, anyways.” Steve eyes widened and yeah, now he felt bad. Even worse than before. "I wouldn't even try because I know you like him." and yeah, Steve now wished to sink into the ground and disappear forever.

“How do you..?” Chrissy gave Steve a look that made him bit down the other half of the sentence. “Look I’m.. I was being a total asshole, but I didn’t really.. shit, I can’t even say a single thing that makes sense!” he sighed, so Chrissy secured him with a smile. “I’m genuinely sorry, Chris. I like you, you’re a nice person and I’m all into this getting closer stuff.”

“Apology accapted. But just because you’re head over heels for Eddie. That’s you’re only excuse, but it better not be happening again.” Chrissy smiled and this time Steve smiled, too. It gave Chrissy such a big relief. “Alright. Tell me all about it. When did you fall in love with him? We can sit down here somewhere and eat some M&M’s if you like.”

“Honestly, I have no clue how it happened.” Steve nodded as they settled down and he started to talk while Chrissy was listening to his every word, soft wind blowing around them and all Chrissy could hear was Steve’s love-soaked voice.

[adoranoia]

some more misc hcs, for funsies, since i did a couple replies, lmao.

>due to his fondness for insects/arachnids/bugs in general, instead of a normal pet, arvo had a pet tarantula as a child/pre-apocalypse, her name was zoya. natasha also had a pet, a in-training service dog, a rough collie named bolshoi, and lost him fairly early on. >i totally forgot to add these last time i drew him, so. whoops, but arvo has braces, with rubberbands, too. yes, he is tempted to go at them with pilers somedays.

>at one point, arvo found a old journal, and he still uses it tbh, basically using it like a diary. he also tends to doodle in it a lot, nothing rlly good just bored scribbles. he'll also sometimes draw on his arms/skin in general. >sometimes when hes bored enough, he’ll ‘doodle' math and science shit in his journal too, like catch him filling up pages with long ass polynomial problems and calculus. he finds it calming, its like second nature to him and he doesn’t have to rlly think about it.

>though he technically wasn’t supposed to watch them growing up,  arvo is kind of a horror junkie ?? like horror movies/books/games are his kinda thing, ok. sometimes his old group used to tell stories to pass the time while traveling, or at night, and arvo highkey got banned from participating bc his stories were always scary. >arvo vc: u guys are nooooo fun smh !!

>a big reason arvo is into botany/plants and gardening as much as he is, is partly because he was a kid he used to help his mom garden and stuff, which sparked his interest in it.

>used to take a bunch of different music lessons when he was a kid, but the only one that really stuck was piano. tho hes a lot better with copying music (playing by ear, sight reading) then he is making some thing new, or making stuff up on the spot. he tends to always think of it more logically / math-like, almost bc that's just what he finds easier.

>arvo has a really bad nail biting/picking habit! it’s an anxious tic, he’ll bite/pick them down super short until they start bleeding, and will probs continue to bite them anyway bc hes stupid, asdfghjkl? he’ll also bite/pick at his cuticles until the same shit happens, (someone pls yell @ him 4 it).

[editorauthoranna]

THE SHINING (Sorta) Book Review

The Shining

By Stephen King

Oh boy, oh boy, was this book nothing like I expected. I’ll start by  saying I’d never seen the movie and that I knew . . . well, essentially nothing about the book. Actually, the only thing I knew about The Shining was the few seconds of it shown at the drive-in theater in the movie Twister. And that was only after my mom said, “Hey, look, it’s The Shining.”

I’ve never been a horror connoisseur. Probably the opposite. I was the kid that jumped and yelped when tapped on the shoulder, and the scariest thing I’d seen was Alien through my fingers at age fifteen. But after meeting my significant other and his love of most things dark and spooky, I found myself at the tip of a compromise to watch more horror so long as I got to watch something cute after—though my love of movie romances died very quickly upon the re-watch and analysis of a few old favorites. But we’re not here to discuss that.

We’re here for Jack Torrance and his family. This isn’t a book review. Really. I don’t have enough exposure to the horror genre of  books (this was the first of its kind I’ve picked up) to give an actual review. But I can tell you what I thought was neat and (probably the  biggest reason this blog post might make someone argue with me) why I really disliked the movie.

So let’s jump in! I’ll do my best not to be super spoiler-y, but take this as your warning, just in case.

As far as horror goes, The Shining had a surprisingly sedate  pace. This isn’t a bad thing; it was just the exact opposite of the “BOO! AH!” I had been expecting. Instead, The Shining takes on the slow, steady feel of something approaching you from behind. Which . .  . okay, that might be worse. I freely admit I had to put the book down at least twice from getting so creeped out. Anytime Danny was alone, I braced for impact.

Jack’s rather rapid descent (that’s not a spoiler, right?) into the realm of those-that-are-very-mentally-unsound wasn’t a surprise. Even if I wasn’t sure who exactly had that axe when I saw the snippet of film, it wasn’t hard to figure out from about page—and here’s a laugh for  you—thirteen.

Unfortunately, I’ve discovered I’m one of those people that once they know what the source of “the scary” is, they’re not really that scared anymore. Fun facts about Anna. The scariest part of the book, for me, was well before the climax of the story. That’s not a critique in any way. Quite a few instances after the spoiler-y part I’m talking about—think outside with snow and, if you’ve read it, you’ll get it—were  pretty unsettling.

I definitely preferred reading the sections that were from Danny’s point of view. King does a nice job letting us into the child’s head without making him seem too much like an adult. That’s a hard balance to strike.

Now . . . the movie. I was well on my way to strongly disliking The Shining in movie format long before a friend told me that Stephen King hated it. I know. I know. It’s a “classic.” But it really shouldn’t even be called The Shining as there is very little to do with King’s book within that screenplay. I was, and continue to be, disappointed. Most of my major complaints are complaints King had about the movie himself, so let’s get into a few of those.

Problem #1? Jack Torrance’s character. In the movie, you know immediately that Jack is out of his mind. There’s no mystery.  No saying to yourself, “Hey, this guy is genuinely trying to be better, even if he’s sorta failing at it. He’s owned up to his mistakes (mostly) and a begrudging try is better than none at all.” Trying is a huge part  of redemption arcs, and King’s novel gives Jack tons and tons of chances to be better. Jack not taking every opportunity to be better is a part of Jack being human. It allows for a rounded and character-driven story.

Problem #2? The movie made Wendy look like a terrible mother. If you’ve read the book, you know she showed care and love for her son and would do anything to protect him even if she was frightened too. Movie-Wendy may as well have been a cardboard cutout placed on set.

Problem #3? Danny has almost nothing to do with the plot of the movie besides a few takeaways adjacent to the novel’s content. As I said for #1, The Shining is a character-driven novel. You have nothing without those characters and their flaws and feelings and fears. This is the main reason the movie flopped for me. It was just a two and a half hour calliope loop of incoherence with no character development anywhere in sight.

Now, before someone comes after me, unlike Stephen King, I didn’t hate the movie with a passion. I can appreciate the cinematography and Jack Nicholson’s unhinged performance along with the creep factor, but the movie credits really should have said “inspired by” rather than  “based upon” Stephen King’s novel.

~Anna

[talenlee]

Decemberween '23 — Survivor Histories

Last year I spoke about how I had taken to leaving a channel of ‘horror movie summarised’ videos up on a second screen while I watched. It was effectively, asking a nerd with some very shallow media analysis skills to advertise horror movies at me and while I found it meaningfully engaging for just long enough to get my brain around the problems I was facing at the time, it was remarkable the ease with which I completely dropped the entire idea this year. I think I wrote that article and immediately forgot even the name of the channel, which is why I haven’t gone and looked it up since, even though as you read this and as I write it, I should be linking it. It’s a blog, it should be cross referenced.

But nah.

Anyway, I think it’s important to recognise the junk food you eat. This year, I spent a month or so learning everything I ever wanted to know about Survivor, and then forgetting it just as quickly.

Survivor is a long running TV series. It’s probably ‘always’ been on TV as much as you remember and if you’re like me you might cast your mind back thinking ‘hang on, wasn’t that on in the 90s?’ Not quite but close enough that your feeling isn’t wrong. The first season of Survivor screened in May 2000, and Season 45 of Survivor just finished screening three weeks ago. That is a rate of about two seasons a year, more or less, with each season composed of about thirteenish episodes. Some were longer, some were shorter, and the show is in general a piece of media that seems to keep getting made because of its remarkably even quality and production values. For a show that involves a lot of sets and going somewhere hard to access, it seems that there’s been enough fuel in the tank to produce forty six episodes of reality TV which has now got its own internal mythology and lore.

And that means there’s space for Youtube channels that want to explain things.

The Scary Cult Alliance of Survivor: South Pacific

Watch this video on YouTube

Now, these episodes feel like they’re made by an elaborate scripting language, I’m going to be honest to you. The presenter has a consistent delivery and tone that feels like someone who’s had a retail job working a tannoy. I don’t remember much of anything this video series gave me except that there have been times when incidents have transpired, and those incidents have led to occurrences.

It may sound like I’m dunking on this channel for being boring but it’s the opposite. Survivor is the absolutely median piece of millennial media culture, the most mediocre thing that somehow has sustained itself across multiple distribution networks and the steady elevation of its host. It, like Chopped is something you can put on while you’re doing other things and care about exactly enough while it’s playing, and that’s how I feel about these videos.

Oh, one incident I remember is that someone on the show outed a trans person as part of a strategy, that sucks, and I hope that person got punished for it by the rest of the islanders. I don’t imagine they did.

Okay okay okay so why am I preaching this vast well of mediocre media analysis of mediocre media? Because mediocre is enough. Because not everything is going to elevate you, not everything can demand an equal amount of your attention. And this is a show that has produced forty-six seasons. This is a show that has produced more seasons than The Simpsons. This is a show which mixes some incredibly basic beach games alongside camping and then holds the entire experience together with a set of social deduction/negotiation games. These games are however, not being played by elaborate game theorists, or people who can map out sequences of information, and they are tainted further by the possibility that they’re contending on the regular with irrational actors. It’s a great example of how ‘gaming things out’ needs to account for people making mistakes accidentally or on purpose. It might not surprise you but a lot of ‘characters’ on Survivor are just, like… people, and those people are often going to make decisions based not on a top-down ‘best strategy’ position and focus more on their emotional needs.

What is the Survivor Purple Edit? (And How To Spot It)

Watch this video on YouTube

Basically, people can be silly and people can be assholes and sometimes they can be silly assholes.

What’s more, if you’re planning on predicting rational actors, your plans get harder and harder to affirm if people are being again, silly assholes.

What’s more, sometimes people just do things that don’t make obvious sense. Some folk decide they’re not happy with the situation they’re in so they try to throw their weight around by destroying food or throwing challenges, figuring that they can reposition and they’re not necessarily going to get bounced from the tribe for it.

Eugh. Tribe.

And it’s not just like watching a game of Werewolf play out slow and stupid, it’s also got that extra dash of being a show that’s twenty years old, and when you get to remind yourself that in your lifetime, gay marriage went from a thing we don’t mention to a thing that’s brought up as a plot point to a thing that’s old news and boring. And on the other hand you’ll hear some words that, historically, are slurs, back in the early conversations.

Survivor is an interesting series. It’s designed to hold interest. Getting my attention and holding it is its job. But what’s remarkable about it in hindsight, after I watched all these videos explaining the history and the context and the greater linked precedence of how much you can hurt yourself in a Survivor Challenge, it all slid out of my memory like it was made out of oil. I had nothing going on in between my ears once I was done with all of this.

Still, it held my attention and it was what I needed when I got it.

Maybe if I was going to make a bunch of buttons…

Check it out on PRESS.exe to see it with images and links!

[maroonghoul]

Terror Time 2022: Days 22 thru 25

Let’s get into it:

Malignant (2021):

Warning: Scenes of domestic abuse early in this movie

I wanted to love this movie. Or more accurately, I DID love this movie but with a big caveat. The over-the-top gothic atmosphere throughout, the Giallo-esque murder sequences, the mystery of what Gabriel is (I thought split personality up until the reveal). Of course, even when I believed that, I had sympathy for the main character and just wanted her to get the help she needed, not the butchers she had years ago. And the ending was a heartwarming, with a bit of bittersweet, that most horror movies don’t have nowadays but I felt was earned here. Outside of a few jumps, I was never really scared, but I was having fun.

And then they revealed what Gabriel was. Now, my problem wasn’t that it was ridiculous or unrealistic (if anything, it helped). It was a personal thing. Depictions of birth trauma, in this case twins eating each other in the womb, ALWAYS made me light headed enough, I need to lie down and get a drink of water. Like I can’t power through without that, if at all. Maybe I have some unresolved trauma of my own. 

So this isn’t a real flaw of the movie. And overall, if there’s a sequel coming, I can't wait for it...to show up to streaming, so I can watch it in my home, with a couch and a water bottle on standby.

Hubie Halloween (2020): The first Adam Sandler movie I’ve seen in ages. And watching it, it’s hard not to remember why. Sandler’s title character is one set up to be what’s funny to do in any given scene rather then a consistent, well thought out character. If this was funny for you, that’s good. I just felt I didn’t understand why a man who says he loves Halloween is startled by stuff like a four year old.

The choice to make most of the adults tired of Hubie’s schtick to the point almost all of them play pranks on him, while most of the teenagers are kind of indifferent to him is odd. Like I get the reason is so younger viewers side with him more. But in-universe, it’s like the older generation have been dealing with him and their own issues for so long, they’ve made him the scapegoat. While the Gen Z Kids, while most of them think it’s funny to scare him, seem more willing to work around him. It and the unearned happy ending implies, if accidentally, that if he’s a tyrant, he’s an ineffective one, because eventually, everyone can work around and ignore him.

And yes, Steve Buscemi’s ‘Werewolf’ character is one of the best parts of the movie, along with the ‘escaped mental patient’ subplot with how that ended. They subverted two horror movie tropes at once, but in a non mean-spirited way, which is appreciated.

The House of the Devil (2009):

Ti West’s earlier horror movie, this time a more committed throwback in presentation, I think. What it’s film on, the fashion, the effects, even the pacing feel at home with any of the 1970s films. 

Though even with that, it’s still an odd structure. First act is entirely setting up the main character. The only thing remotely creepy is the Tom Noonan’s character fairly erratic behavior. Even based on similar films actually from this era I’ve seen (Black Christmas, Phantasm, Hell Night, etc.) actually do more to set up some scary right at the beginning. But this is pretty par for the course w=from what I’ve seen from West. The second act is really just Samantha getting the feel of the house, nothing happening except her putting it together gradually that she is in the lion’s den. 

And then the last twenty minutes kicks things into high gear and doesn’t let up until the end. It’s actually watching this part that interestingly enough reminded me of Get Out and it’s climax. Not to say I think Jordan Peele ripped this off. Outside of the slow burn followed by frantic escape from a house with an evil family, these are still very different movies with different goals and even different genres. 

The ending was just kind of that. No subversion or moment that made it clear what was the big message was. It was an ending that fit in with, like I said, any horror movie that came out around 1983 or such. Like WNUF earlier, it’s a throwback that would’ve fooled me into thinking it was made then if I didn’t know going in. I guess the point WAS “they don’t make them like they used to”. For batter and for worse.

Warning: Sexual Assault scene in third act.

Evil Dead (2013): Another personal marathon tradition of mine; I try to watch one of the Evil Dead movies every year, and this year, it’s the 2013 remake (Or is it? Honestly, you every film in this franchise is a remake in some form or another at this point, so it doesn’t really matter). Some horror movies are made to make you scream, others to make you unsettled, some to thrill you, and some to make you puke. This one is built to make you WINCE. In addition to the plots involving Necronomicons and demonic possession, this franchise is built on making you believe everything in it hurts. Though the others stab, this one feels more like it slices. 

While I liked Ash vs Evil Dead and thought it was a worthy continuation of the previous movies, I’m not alone in thinking it’d be good to continue down this road too. I’m not sure we’ll see Bruce Campbell as Ash again, but I do want to see Jane Levy as Mia again, with or without him. Though if they get funnier with each installment is going to depend.

Also, this again has another scene with body violation. Technically, the whole movie is about that, but there’s a more overt case to start it off after the book is read for the first time.

Censor (2021): A film about a film censor going insane after watching too many “video nasties” bloody horror movie can sound like a bad idea if you look at it the wrong way. But as I hoped, while this movie makes it clear how extreme horror movies at this time can be, it knows who the real horror was. (Again, like a previous movie I mentioned here). While some of the images in these films didn’t help Enid’s condition, it was clear she was bringing a whole lot more unchecked baggage to this job then should be healthy. I liked how it was ambiguous at what point she truly snapped. For all we know, she was already dangerously unstable at the start of the film given how she acted during her first scene with her parents. 

I’m not sure about the theory that it was actually her who killed her sister. I guessed it’s consistent with her mental state, but what was it over? Was it because she was crazy even before that? Though with that, we could be going to demonizing the mentally ill, which I don’t like. 

But points to the film for pointing out that horror filmmakers don’t try to invent the horror, but help people vent it out. I liked the film director when we finally meet him. How he seemed at the start to be all Colonel Kurtz, until he just got tired of Enid being stubborn and lost his temper. Hell, the whole message of this film can be summed up in one of the most famous lines from another certain Meta Horror movie (”Movies don't create psychos. Movies make psychos more creative”)

The ending is just perfect. A “happy ending” disguising a clear picture of the ultimate harm excessive censorship can do to people. (Possible subtle jab to Little Shop of Horrors theatrical ending?)There’s a fine line between knowing not to take on too much and just trying to disconnect from reality. The idea that those with control in society are the most detached from the other people in it in all the worst ways. It creates a scenario where the cure is worse then the disease because it leaves you willfully blind. The beast is inside you and will find a way out. You just have to find a careful, but effective option to feed it. At least one that ends with zero people dead.

Warning: scene of sexual harassments and potential rape about halfway through.

[widow-maximov]

I'll be your knight

Pairing: Natasha x Fem Reader

Warning: Language, fluff, angst, smut.

Summary: Dealing with sexism is a real struggle but eventually a line is crossed and anger is unleashed.

A/n: This is my first time writing smut so hopefully it's good enough :3

Word count: 3.5k

⸻⸻⋙☸⋘⸻⸻

Being an Avenger isn't easy, especially for any women that join the life style of a hero. You had to put up with sexist comments all the time, most of the time it didn't really bother you but the more you heard random men talking about your best friend like she was some toy, the more it annoyed you.

The comments towards you stopped when you were recruited by Tony Stark, there was some level respect for you and you kind of liked it.

You had some issues with opening up to the team but when Wanda, showed you they are harmless, you slowly opened up more and more as you knew that they were going to be your new family from now on.

Everyone on the team warned you about the one particular redhead but you didn't listen, you wanted to be her friend, she looked scary but is an actual softie, but only around you.

It took time for the Russian to even greet you when she saw you but for you it was worth it, you respected her and always been there for her when she had no one to turn to.

She warmed up to you as she saw the security you were offering her, and you never backed down from your offer, she wasn't keen on your presence but had to learn to accept it.

Even if she didn't trust you fully, that was okay. You trusted her with everything because you knew she was a human just like you and no doubt needed someone to lean on.

⸻⸻⋙☸Flashback☸⋘⸻⸻

You walked around, exploring the place that now it was your new home, you never saw anything more fancy than this place, the room you were staying in was more than enough for 4 people.

Your own tv along with your own big walk in closet and your own bathroom, literally a five star hotel, you didn't complain at all, you were just shocked at how spacious this all was.

Each room was bigger than the other and it was starting to get all confusing, when you left the room, you would get mixed up with the way you walked in.

You loved it but at the same time you hated it, you accidently bumped into the Russian, she looked sweaty in her work out clothes and you stared at her with awkwardness.

She eyed you and cleared her throat, attempting to walk past you and continue where she was going but you stopped her "I'm sorry to disturb you but I just want to know where I can find the gym"

You rubbed your neck awkwardly "I- um- I tried searching everywhere but I'm lost"

Usually when people stutter around Natasha, it meant they were obviously attracted to her but with how you stood and looked away from her just showed her that you were afraid of her.

She didn't smile or anything "Walk straight until you reach the end of the hall and turn left"

You looked at her but she was already on her way so you shouted "Thank you!"

You made your way with her instructions of where to go, she knew how to hide her emotions but it was totally shocking for you how she never had a smile across her lips.

This was your first real conversation, not the hello's or goodbye's. It was a proper conversation, well kind of a proper but it was a start and that's what made you happy.

Second encounter with the redhead was a lot better, the two of you actually had a normal conversation in the morning, you were barely awake so coffee was your way of helping with that.

Walking into the kitchen, not really expecting anyone up early this morning, but the sight of the yawning Russian met your eyes, you smiled at her the best you could as you turned to make yourself a coffee.

"You know there is a coffee maker here?" Her naturally raspy voice spoke which caused you to look at her.

"Yeah I seen it but I have no idea how to use it" You confessed, you weren't embarrassed, you just weren't that fancy to ever own one or even be around one.

She turned around without a word and pulled out a cup, placing it underneath the little nozzle and within seconds the coffee poured out, she took the cup and placed it down as she slid it towards you.

You looked at her and then back at the coffee "Thank you Natasha"

She nodded as she sipped on her own drink "Since you are the only person who is up right now, you mind taking a look at this report, I'm not really sure what it means"

You was taken back, she was asking you for help? Shouldn't she know all of the reports like the back of her hand? She noticed your silence "Or you don't have to, I'll probably figure-"

"No, no I have nothing to do today so I don't mind helping" You smiled and took the coffee with you as you followed her into the room where she had a loads of reports laid out.

You looked at all of them "You know you can work on two reports at a time?"

She nodded "I know but the more I do within a certain time, the less I have later on"

You nodded as you sipped your warm coffee, it was very different to what you were used to, but this was definitely easier to get used to. It was the first time Natasha spent more than 2 minutes with you and you were more than happy to accept that.

So from that time, the two of you worked every morning with each other on reports, you learnt so much from her and in some way she learnt more about you rather than from you, she was impressed by your calmness with her constant questions.

To be fair you wanted to open up to the Russian, she had that safety vibe coming of her and you knew that she would never betray you or your trust that you put in her.

The mornings spent on reports also turned into evenings and soon there was movies every other day, she loved horror movies but you on the other hand loved action movies, there was plenty of action as a hero of the world but it never was enough.

She started to show herself around you more often and you really liked how you could make her laugh with simply couple words. She loved how close she gotten to you and how you trusted her with everything.

She had some doubt but you were always to reassure her, she was thankful for it each time, so in return she would ask you questions about yourself and you never hesitated for a moment to tell her.

⸻⸻⋙☸End☸⋘⸻⸻

But the problem was that not everyone saw it like that, they saw her for her body but not for her heart which is one of many reasons to why she was slow at opening up.

It angered you that people didn't want to treat her like anyone else, just because she was gorgeous didn't automatically make her less of a human.

Today was one of those days where you were busy, like busy busy, overloaded with bunch of reports that needed to be sorted before the next day, so you spent your whole day in you room, you glared at the clock on the wall.

You was doing this for 6 hours straight, no breaks so you decided to just do that. You stood up and stretched out, walking out of your room without anyone around, it did ignite curiosity in you so you walked around cautiously to see what was the deal.

Three of your teammates with two random agents were placed on the couch in the living room, trapping Natasha in between them, from her body language she didn't want to be there.

Bruce and Bucky along with Steve seem to laugh at the agents jokes, you moved closer to the door as you listened to what they were saying.

"Come on Natasha, you should do that power pose and show off that body" One of the agents spoke up as they eyed the Russian.

The other agent tried to move closer to her but hesitated, knowing she could easily tackle him "You can't let that body go to waste"

The anger was raising as words spilled out of their mouths, why didn't Steve stop them? Did he really think that as well?

"I was near to tapping that ass but you know women" Bruce made a comment as he laughed along with the agents.

"If she dyed her hair blonde, the amount of jokes we could make then" Bucky smirked as he spoke loudly.

Natasha was just taking in all of the comments, you could see across her face that she didn't enjoy it at all, so she stood up and what they did next made you finally act.

They all looked at her ass and whistled "Romanoff, you should dance for us, show off those curves"

"I am a little hungry as well, you might as well move that pretty ass of yours and make us something to eat" One of the agents spoke up as he laughed.

You walked in as you raised your brows at the 5 men sitting and eyeing Natasha as a piece of meat, you pulled her into you causing her to jump a little but relax when she realised it was you.

They all looked at you and the other agent smirked "Are yous going to put on a lesbian show for us?"

Now you wasn't just unimpressed but also pissed, you pulled yourself away from the Russian as you stepped forwards in front of Natasha "Listen here you little dick, If I hear that you even looked at Natasha in any way, I will fucking haunt you and make sure you don't live to see tomorrow"

His friend was terrified, he gulped when you looked at him "As for you, I want you to go and make her a fucking five star meal and if it's not good, I swear to god you'll regret being born"

He shook his head so fast as he stood up but you stopped him with your powers "You want a show? I will fucking give you a show"

You gripped his face, squishing his cheeks very firmly, your hand started to glow blue as you made him hallucinate that he was in pain, from the fact that he couldn't move and he felt as if his skin was being peel off he only could scream.

You looked at the 4 men who looked very terrified of you, your eyes had flames and you wasn't going to go easy, on neither of them "If any of you ever comment anything sexist or inappropriate about any woman, including Natasha. I will make your life a living hell"

"Do yous understand?"

They shook their heads and scattered away from you as fast as they could, you let go of the dude in front of you, he looked weak but he gotten up so fast that you could swear he had powers as well.

You turned towards Natasha, worried "Are you okay? Did they touch you?"

You looked her up and down as you made your way towards her, she shook her head with a small smile. You pulled her into a hug as a single tear slid down Natasha's face.

You pulled away as you wiped that tear off with your thumb "Why didn't you act Nat?"

"What's the point? It wont stop them from saying what they want Y/n/n"

The pain in your heart was strong at the words, how could any woman not be scared of what could happen if they do protest against men.

You cupped her face as you looked into her eyes "Natasha Romanoff, I promise you that I will protect you from their filthy mouths"

She smiled, this time it met her eyes which caused you to smile. You crushed on Natasha for a long time and promised yourself that when the time was right you would tell her but each time it was harder to do so.

Her and Bruce at the time were something but when she decided to break it off, you were there for her you told her she didn't need to tell you the reason to why she decided that but reassured her that it was probably a good reason to do so.

Now you are holding her face as her eyes are locked with yours, you could feel those butterflies in your stomach raise up "I will be your knight in casual clothes because armour isn't my style"

She laughed with her whole heart, causing you to laugh as well "Gosh I love you.."

You froze at her words, and so did she, her eyes widen at her words but she knew there was no way out of this so she pulled her sleeve and started to fidget with it.

Your hands were on her face but dropped at those words, you stood still trying to understand what just happened, she continued as she looked down "I hope that's okay but I love you Y/n"

You couldn't believe your ears, the woman who always had trouble opening up, right now was vulnerable with her whole heart to you and you was stuck, frozen as you stared at her.

"I never had anyone stand up for me the way to did today, I started to realise that I had feelings that one day when you were near to death on that mission" She was still fidgeting with her sleeve.

"It's okay if you don't feel the same way but you just needed to know.." She confessed, she was standing in front of you holding her heart out in her hands, offering you to take it.

You smiled whole heartily as you looked into her eyes when you pulled her face by her chin "It's more than okay Tasha"

Your hands dropped to her hips as you pulled her in closer to you "Because I love you too"

That look in her eyes, you could see that she had those butterflies too, her eyes locked with yours, she tilted her head slightly to the side and crashed her lips against yours.

Her hands were placed on the back of your neck pulling you deeper into her kiss, you slowly backed her into the wall and when her back hit the wall, she gasped which you used the opportunity to slide your tongue inside her mouth.

The kiss became heated real quick, forgetting that the two of you were still in the public place, only when someone cleared their throat, make the two of you look where the sound came from.

Natasha hid her face in the crook of your neck as she quietly laughed at how awkward that is, you pulled yourself away from her as you looked in the direction of Tony, who looked at you with pure disgust.

"As if you never done this, but sorry you had to witness..." You rolled your eyes at him at first but looked over at Natasha who was still leaning on the wall "This"

She smiled as she intertwined her hand with yours and tugged it to pull you out of the living room, the two of you made it to her room but it wasn't long before you reclaimed her lips with your own.

This time it was a little bit more gentle, you backed her up to the bed as the back of her leg hit the bed frame, before you pushed her back and claimed on top of her.

The only light was the moonlight that was shining through the blinds, you kissed her passionately and redirected your kisses down to her neck, she moved her face to the side giving you more access to her neck.

You left marks as you slightly stank your teeth in but sucked the spot right after, earning a few small moans from the redhead beneath you, she was slowly turning into a mess but she managed to slightly pull you away.

"Don't you have a lot of work?" She asked a little worried but lust was more visible.

"It can wait" You declared as you looked into her eyes "Are you sure you want this?"

She smiled at you being caring and asking for consent "I want this детка (baby)"

You smirked as you placed a soft kiss on her lips and returned to her neck, giving it a couple more kisses and slowly moving down, the only thing that stopped you was the material of her clothes.

She slightly lifted herself off as you pulled her shirt off, exposing her upper body, you looked at her in admiration, her eyes had slight doubt across them but you were quick to reassure her.

"You are beautiful Tasha" You meant every word that came out of your mouth.

There was a blush across her cheeks as she smiled at you, your hand reached for the back of her bra as you unhooked it and pulled it off her.

You took couple of seconds to admire the view before attaching your mouth to her nipple, she bit her bottom lip to prevent her from moaning.

Your free hand glued itself to the other breast, giving it the same amount of attention as your mouth did, you moved your lips to her ear as your hand kept playing with her now hard nipple.

"I want to hear you Natty" You whispered into her ear and with that Natasha moaned into your ear causing a small smirk to settle on your lips.

You continued to kiss down her body until you reached the bottom of her stomach, you looked up at her to see if she was okay, she nodded to give you the confirmation.

You pulled her shorts off along with her underwear, exposing the bottom half of her body, you could smell her arousal which only fuel you on.

You teased her as you kissed her inner thigh, leaving marks there as well, you would from time to time lock eyes with her. You moved closer to her pussy, teasing her with your tongue causing some frustrated moans to escape her mouth.

Her hips would buck as you would teasingly lick her wet folds, she looked down at you as her eyes were consumed with lust "Please Y/n! Just fuck me already"

That's all you needed to hear before you attached your mouth to her dripping pussy, giving her clit the attention first as the more louder moans escaped her mouth.

You gripped her with your hands as your tongue worked it's magic against her hard clit, she was gripping the bed sheets as moans were spilling out of her lips, not caring if anyone heard.

You moved one of your hands as you slipped one of your fingers inside her and without letting her adjust you started to thrust into her, the feeling of pleasure was building up quickly in the bottom of her stomach with each thrust.

"Oh god" Those were the only words she managed to choke out, she was soaked which stoked up your own arousal along with her moans.

Her hips were quick to match your pace as you thrusted, bringing her closer and closer, you pushed the second finger inside and this time you curled the two fingers, hitting her spot all over again.

One of her hands gripped your arm as her nails dug into your skin, the other hand was still tightly gripping the bedsheet, her head was thrown back as you came up to her face.

Your pace of your fingers never slowing down but thrusting harder and fast "Let me show you how you should be treated instead darling.."

You kissed her lips as she moaned, you moved back down as you felt her walls tighten, knowing she was about to cum. You pushed your fingers even deeper into her, her breathing was heavy letting out low and loud moans.

You watched as the orgasm consumed Natasha with your name falling freely from her lips, you slowed down your thrusts to let her ride out her orgasm, holding her steady pulling your fingers out of her as you licked her clean, and moved back up to her lips.

Kissing her as she slightly moaned at the taste of herself into the kiss, you pulled away from her as she was still breathing heavily, staring into your eyes with a smile.

"Now it's your turn" She spoke in between breathes.

You shook your head "Not today darling, today's focus is you.."

You stripped yourself naked as you pressed your warm body against Natasha, glaring at the marks you left and holding her tight in your arms as she slowly calmed down from her high.

You were sure in this moment that you wanted to hear her moan your name till the rest of your life, it was the music to your ears and you didn't want it any other way.

⸻⸻⋙☸⋘⸻⸻

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Tag-list: @diaryoflife,@wandanatblogs,@madamevirgo, @eilarch

[littlefreya]

Henry's reaction to finding out GF's house is haunted.

Summary: Henry’s friend invites him over to watch a horror film on Halloween, problem is he is madly in love with her.

Pairings: Henry Cavill x Unamed OFC (3rd person, no description)

Warnings: RPF, fluff, romantic goo, friends to lovers or rather idiots to lovers, brief mentions of alcohol and Henry’s green hoodie p0rn.  

Words: 1.6K

A/N: So I had to take it to the “friends to lovers” lane, also I will need all the fluff after what I am about to post tomorrow :|! Divider by @firefly-graphics. Beta’d by my beautiful @agniavateira​ . Also FYI my house is totally haunted.

Please comment and reblog if you enjoyed. 

Haunted Houses

All Hallow's Eve was Henry’s favourite time of the year. The spicy autumn air was thickly shrouded by magic. Spooky tales and plastic spiders inhabited drapes of thin cotton tendrils and fat pumpkins carved with scary faces would sit on his doorstep to welcome him home or bid him farewell on his way out. 

Per tradition, he would rally close friends at midnight for a horror flick and pineapple-anchovy pizza; often a bottle of rum would be added to the party. However, this Halloween fell on a bittersweet period, as his friends grew too old for said spooky gatherings. Starting new families of their own, they had no time to indulge him.

All save for her, who just like him was still somehow single. 

How bad would it be to spend the evening just the two of them... alone? Ignoring the fact that it was enough to see her name flicker on the screen of his phone for pure warmth to enkindle in his chest. He thought about her often before he fell asleep and when he woke up; and by often, he meant every single day since he met her.

Though she didn’t think much of him as anything other than a friend she loved to banter with - he presumed. And of course she loved Kal, possibly more than she cared for him. Yet, Henry did what he did best: bury his emotions into a little pit he dug in the graveyard of his mind. 

"Heh!” Henry croaked as the door opened. His sapphires ensnared the veils of black that cloaked her, preserving the sight of silk laces tied tightly at her torso in what seemed like a gothic medieval gown. 

“I see you took off your costume for the evening." 

She narrowed her eyes but only to observe his attire carefully: that same green hoodie and a pair of worn jeans that complimented his… asset. 

She wanted to etch her fingers around the thick fabric and have a whiff of this hoodie, or perhaps just steal it and wear it forever and a day.

"First of all, it is called The Witching Hour so I must dress properly. Secondly - where is your costume, Cavill?" she crossed her arms together, looking rather displeased. 

“I’m dressed as a homicidal maniac, we look like everybody else does.” 

Snorting, she tilted her head, unimpressed. “You totally just stole this joke from Wednesday Addams.” 

Henry shrugged and pressed his lips to a thin line. One of his foolish expressive gestures. It made her feel less nervous to which she was thankful. When she suggested they’d hang out despite them being the only two, she didn’t think much of the consequences of being all alone with the man who inhabited her mind and never paid rent. Everything about Henry made her feverish, but it was always easy when others accompanied them. The awkward anxiety of having to entertain him wasn’t her job, not up till now… 

Oh, god! What if they had nothing to talk about? What if their playful chemistry was always influenced by the presence of other people?

Beads of sweat began to form below her breasts when Henry shoved a bottle of rum into her hand and then leaned in to steal a casual kiss from her cheek. She smiled with a friendly huff in return, stifling the shiver that coursed through her muscles while he welcomed himself into her home. 

Striding forward, he peered at the Halloween decorations she hung across the walls and inhaled deeply - the scent of maple and buttery chestnuts filled the cosy little house, a scent that he could easily get intoxicated with. 

It was what she smelled like and here he was, drowning in its excess.

After a quick observation, he turned to look at her, holding his hands clasped behind his back. She smiled awkwardly in return and then averted her gaze, becoming fascinated by the bottle he brought.

‘There it is,’ Henry mused, ‘that embarrassing silence, there is so much to tell her, but she probably… no! She definitely finds me boring.’

This Halloween celebration would probably be the last and it was all sorts of disastrous. 

Trying to overcome the silence, he cleared his throat and reached a hand to scratch his curly mane. “So what movie are we watching?”

“Movie?” she asked confused and then quickly corrected, “Oh yes, umm... The Exorcist.” 

“Good, love me some green vomit.” his eyes followed carefully as she waltzed into the small open kitchen, placing the rum on the counter and then returning with a large bowl that made his nostrils flare.

“Green vomit goes extremely well with caramelised popcorn,” she suggested and popped a golden flake of popcorn into her mouth. 

“Sweet-salty popcorn? I love you!” Henry groaned and snatched the bowl right away. It was only when his mouth was stuffed that he realised what words he just used. 

But she didn’t seem to react, thankfully. Instead, she brushed a hand over her many skirts and pointed toward the living room.

Hugging the bowl, Henry strode behind her, entering the dimly lit living room. The traditional pizza was already laid on the wooden coffee table, along with a few bottles of Guinness. 

Her couch was small, only fit for a couple. And Henry, being a hulking man, took most of the space. Their thighs immediately ground into one another’s, yet they both pretended as if they hadn't noticed the hot tingle running beneath the layers of clothing. 

“I have to warn you about something,” she uttered, hoping that the tremor she suddenly felt in her body was not visible to him. 

Henry crooked his eyebrow, looking at the ominous glare she offered.

“My house is totally haunted.”  

Not waiting for his answer, she grabbed the remote and pressed play. Henry chuckled at her silly joke, waiting for her to break character but she only peered at the screen.

“Nice try, I am not scared of that stuff.” He shifted in his seat slightly, lifting his lengthy arm and spreading it on the headrest right behind her. Immediately, he regretted this semi-possessive masculine gesture, but it was too late to pull it away. 

Her instincts screamed to snuggle into him yet she held back. “Don’t believe me, but I am not making this up,” she insisted, “Every night around 3 am, I hear scratching from within the walls and these thuds from the ceiling, and then one night… I woke up the door creaking.”

Henry glanced at her quietly for a long moment, watching the reflection from the screen gyrating over her glossy irises and then snorted. He leaned toward the coffee table and grabbed two beers, uncorking them with the help of his pinky ring and then offering her one of the bottles. 

“I think you have rats.”

“Rats who make heavy thuds and open bedroom doors?”

“Yup, a big fat randy rat.” he teased. “We’ll take a look at your bedroom later, but I promise you, there are no such things as ghosts.”

‘We’ll take a look in your bedroom? Great…’ He berated himself. At this point, he just wanted to sigh and shake his head. 

She peered at him oddly, her throat clenching a tad before she turned her head back to the movie with a mumble, “It’s not a ghost, it’s a demon.” 

Within a few minutes they grew quiet, deciding to focus on the movie with the occasional dry jokes and bad puns from Henry as an attempt to overcome his anxiety. Outside the window, thunder rumbled in the distance and shy raindrops lightly kissed the glass, tinted with the many vague shades of lights coming from the street. 

Now and then, Henry shifted in his seat, his meaty thigh further grinding into her leg which stirred her blood to the point of electric spasms. She lightly pushed against him, pretending it’s by accident when truthfully, she wanted to exploit every second of being in his proximity. Had she any guts, she would turn to kiss him, but the thought alone made her heart clench in fear.

She threw him a glance, and their eyes met. Henry offered a kind grin, avoiding staring at her lips. She smiled back coyly, her heartbeat accelerating with anticipation when the possessed girl in the movie made a horrifying groan that ruined the moment. 

And then the room suddenly was swallowed in darkness, followed by a strong clap of thunder that tore open the sky.  

In the scant moment of chaos, he heard a scream and then the light came back as if nothing happened, aside from the fact that she was now in his arms, with her legs straddling his waist, and her fingers clutching the collar of his hoodie. 

Henry was unsure how and when his hand found itself latched to the small of her back, only that he didn’t want to let go. They exchanged bemused glances and swallowed the dryness parching their throats.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered hoarsely, “I got scared…”

Embarrassed to the point of tears, she attempted to climb off, wanting nothing more than to run to the bathroom and cry in hiding, when Henry sent a hand to stroke her temple and gently brushed his fingers behind her ear.

“Stay,” he insisted, squeezing into her lower back as if to prevent her from escaping. 

Her lips parted slowly, the same golden hue that suffused the living room split into her eyes, beaming even brighter as he continued to caress her face before bringing her closer to graze her lips with his.

Halloween was, without a doubt, his favourite. 

Tagging: @the-soot-sprite​ @henrythickcavill​ because they asked to be tagged in these. <3 

[coeurdastronaute]

Halloween 3

Previously on Halloween

Even with Autumn allegedly falling, the rolling hills of LA weren’t exactly brimming with autumnal cheer. Except for at a certain house. At a certain house, there were pumpkins out front, carved to near perfection, at least in the opinion of the inhabitant and her helpers. There were scary monsters on the lawn, and spiderwebs shrouding the sleek mansion comically. 

Never one for holidays in general, the lesser ones-- the ones without food or family attached generally went unnoticed by the actress who was suddenly putting an alarming amount of effort into her horror house and Halloween party. But just a year ago she’d sat in a near empty house without even a jack-o-lantern on the porch, and handed out candy to a tiny version of her character, and she wasn’t sure things would ever really be the same. 

It hadn’t been that she never considered having a family, just that… well, she in fact hadn’t ever considered it. It was never a question she pondered, never had the time to wonder if someone would stick around long enough, if she would want to be a parent. If she knew what it would look like. The thought just never crossed her mind. 

That made it worse, with Maddie, in a way. It was worse because Lexa hadn’t considered a kid, and she certainly hadn’t considered being a step-parent, and she damn well wasn’t very good at figuring out what it all meant in her life and the new questions it would bring up for her and from her sister on late night phone calls while her nephew fussed. Would she want to have her own kids one day. Would she ever want to move in with Clarke? Would she be okay with Finn coming around often and forever?

But Lexa did the adult thing that adults do when imposed with a plethora of questions she was afraid to answer-- she hid. She worked hard, and for better or worse, without looking at her backpack for a parachute, she jumped out of the plane, throwing herself into Clarke’s world. 

Unfortunately, it was effortless. It just worked. Even with those nagging thoughts that swirled sometimes, and even with the work and the fear. It worked in a way that made Lexa try harder, which only made it easier. A problem unlike any other she’d encountered in her life. 

This year she wasn’t just handing out candy. This year, despite herself, she’d fallen head over heels for a little girl who actually nearly cried when she took her to set to visit the space ship of her dreams. This year, against all odds, Lexa found herself at squirt soccer games on Saturday mornings and a very riveting retelling of the princess and the pea for a school play, flowers in hand, ready to applaud the tiny actress. This year, Lexa bought snacks-- actual children’s snacks, and kept them in her home. This year, she developed quite an addiction to some of those snacks, much to her girlfriend’s amusement. 

This year looked very different than last year, Lexa decided, surveying the party planners and caterers setting up for the bash, with her themed cookies and eyeballs in the blood punch. Even the bartender had a set of three or four spooky drink options in purple and black and orange and red, ready to wow the A-listers on the guest roster. 

Halloween was now her holiday, Lexa decided, surveying the yard. She’d always loved horror movies, despite never getting the chance to be in one. She’d probably hate it, she told herself, electing instead to retain a little bit of magic she had left in film. 

It was a little weird, to have an anniversary on Halloween, but it also felt fitting. Lexa had teased her girlfriend for the past few weeks about never getting a romantic date, instead having to settle for blood and guts and monsters. But, for yet another reason as to why Lexa was madly in love with the doctor, Clarke had kissed her cheek and told her that she’d expected nothing else in the world. She also insisted that their true anniversary was November 15th, well after the initial meeting, when Lexa finally kissed her, and it was all downhill ever since. 

That part made the actress smile. 

“Wow! This looks so cool!” Maddie cheered as they snuck in with the help. She was six now, and Lexa had given her a whole NASA themed bundle, including the bomber jacket she was currently sporting. 

It made Lexa smile, to be part of her life. Without even thinking about it, she scooped up the tiny astronaut-in-training and held her on her hip. 

“Thanks. Want to help me test out the cookies?” 

“Hey, no. Just one-- Lex, she’ll sugar crash,” Clarke scolded, bringing up the rear. 

“She’s staying with Grandma tonight,” she shrugged earning an exasperated look. “Fine. We’ll only have one cookie. For now.” 

“For now,” Maddie echoed, reaching over and picking the one she wanted. 

When Lexa righted herself, she placed the little girl on the ground and earned a kiss on her cheek. It wasn’t enough, so she grabbed hips and kissed her properly. A girl like Clarke always needed kissed properly, or she got a little wild, a little out of control. 

“Have a cookie. They’re shaped like murder implements.” 

The doctor looked at her daughter enjoying a bloody chainsaw and rolled her eyes. Lexa smiled and wiggled her eyebrows helplessly. 

“Do I get to come to the party?” 

She was trying her best puppy dog eyes. Lexa was a sucker, she discovered, for any of the Griffin women when they looked even the slightest bit forlorn. But this was certainly not going to be a party for a six year old, no matter how adorable it was that she liked Lexa and dressed up like her once or twice. 

“Not this time,” Clarke reminded her. “Maybe when you’re older.”

“How old?” 

“Probably twenty-five,” Lexa offered. 

“That’s so old.” 

“But, we get to go trick-or-treating, and that’s going to be so much better than this stupid party. Way better candy too.” 

“That’s true.” 

“And we all have our costumes ready.” 

“I’m so excited,” Maddie nodded. “Can we put them on and go?” 

Lexa looked at Clarke who looked between the two of them, realized it was always going to be a losing battle. 

“It’s about that time,” she agreed, earning a kiss from her girlfriend. 

XXXXXXXXX

There were two sets of costumes, the ones for trick-or-treating and the ones for the party. Clarke wasn’t entirely sure which ones she was more excited for, but Lexa and her daughter’s spirit were infectious for the holiday. It was probably their penchant for sweets and eagerness to dress up any time of the day or night, but Clarke had never been in that league. She never had the imagination for it, she’d shrug. An only child with not a lot of friends led to books and wonder, but a lifetime of science and school tore it all away. 

Until Lexa. 

It was fairly certain that they couldn’t repeat the costumes. Clarke occasionally still blushed about the fact that she spent hours creating a replication of Lexa’s actual uniform for her daughter. 

But no. Lexa was prepared for anything except putting on the old suit once again. 

And that was how Clarke was suddenly wearing a Tinkerbell costume. She missed her scrubs, hating herself for ever complaining about them. She rolled her eyes in the mirror and grew more and more frustrated in her attempt to do a tight bun atop her head. In the hall, the other two in this three-piece costume parade could be heard practicing. 

It was hard to believe that a year ago, she didn’t know Lexa existed. Well, she knew that she existed in the sense that she knew Serena Williams exists, or even Paul Rudd-- tertiary existences on the same planet separated by time and space and fate. But now, Lexa was here, or rather, Clarke was in her house. And she’d been in this house many times in the year following their initial bump. 

In a year, Lexa had hopped into her life seamlessly, unafraid, completely prepared for whatever came up-- cancelled dates because of flaky babysitters, sick kids, school plays, field days, long shifts in the ER, and a distinct lack of sleep most days. They’d weathered three months apart while Lexa filmed in the desert. They endured a few run ins with Finn. They even survived Christmas together after only dating for a month. 

This time was different. Clarke was certain. 

“Oh wow, this is…” Lexa gaped, decked out in an all black version of Maddie’s Peter Pan costume. “You look…” 

Not one inch of Lexa was uncovered, but she tugged the mask off and gazed appreciatively at her girlfriend and her jaw dropped. 

“And you are one of the best looking shadows I’ve ever seen.”

“Don’t say that in front of yours. She’s sensitive.��

Without meaning to, Clarke chuckled. Her daughter bounced around, happy to be her new favorite obsession, never growing up. Lexa had the option to be anyone else. She could have been Wendy, she could have been Captain Hook, hell-- she could have been the dog, but no-- she didn’t want to be seen, and it suited her just fine to be a shadow. 

They made it around the neighborhood in record time before knocking on the final door of the night. 

“Wow, look at this,” Abby smiled as she found her granddaughter posing, her shadow in the same pose behind her. 

For a moment they put on a show, Maddie moving around and Lexa doing her best to imitate her. 

“Wow!” Clarke and Abby clapped together at their display until Lexa scooped Maddie up again. 

“I’m almost more impressed you’re in a costume,” she teased her daughter earning a shrug. “I don’t think Clarke’s dressed up with any sort of effort in years.” 

“I was a very slutty cheerleader in college once,” the doctor tried to disagree. She earned a look from Lexa and shook her head. “It was a whole thing. It doesn’t matter.” 

“I think it does. Might there be pictures?” 

But Clarke ignored her girlfriend and gave her daughter a hug and kiss before telling her not to make too much of a mess or eat too much candy with grandma. Lexa got a special high five before holding out her hand for Tinkerbell to follow her home. 

“You’re really good with Maddie. I don’t know if I’ve told you that lately, but you are.” 

“She’s fun to be around.” 

“You don’t mind it, do you?” 

Sporadically, maybe every few weeks Clarke would venture to check in on that part of her life, and every time, without fail, Lexa would shake her head, roll her eyes and say:

“No way. I’m dating a milf.” 

Far from poetry, but the sentiment was appreciated. 

XXXXXXXXXX

The party was a wilder party than Lexa could ever remember throwing. Wall to wall, her entire place was packed with people, friends, and acquaintances. She’d certainly never had so many people ein her house at once. But she didn’t care because she was dressed up like a fighter pilot and dancing happily with her Kelly McGillis smushed between all of the bodies. 

The holiday was a weird one to make a point of spending time with people she liked and drinking, but Lexa realized she didn’t care, and that this truly was her holiday. Clarke could have Thanksgiving and Maddie could have Christmas. She’d happily take the candy and tricks and fun of a drunken costumed night. 

It wasn’t until well after three in the morning that the party even started to die down, and it wasn’t until near four that the pair retreated to their room, prepared to let the cleaners Lexa had hired for this express purpose, take over in the morning. 

“That was fantastic,” Clarke smiled, holding herself up by her elbows as she watched Lexa unzip and pull off the sleeves of her flight suit. 

“Not a bad shindig. I suppose I might have to make a habit of it.” 

“Lexa’s Halloween Bash. It has a nice ring to it.” 

“Never at my house again though.”

“Yeah, that was dumb,” Clarke nodded. 

For a second, Lexa puttered around the room, her nervous energy reemerging after a lack of drinks in the past few hours and the soberness slipping in slowly. Clarke kicked off her shoes, letting them flop where they man, for she did not care one bit. 

“I know it’s not a romantic holiday, but it is our anniversary,” Lexa began. 

“It’s not. I told you, November--”

“It’s the anniversary of you, stealing my heart,” she clarified. “Showing up at my door and making me very nervous to text you. I think I played it pretty cool.” 

“I’ve seen worse,” Clarke shrugged, earning a bashful smile. 

Lexa dug in a drawer by the bed and pulled out a rather real looking heart, anatomically correct and all. 

“I figured since it was the right holiday, I’d give you my heart,” Lexa grinned, handing it over. 

“I’ll dread to think of what you might give me on Valentine’s day since you’ve already given me this.” 

“Shut up and open it.” 

The plastic toy opened around the middle, and Clarke recognized a velvety box inside as probably containing jewelry. She furrowed and looked back at her girlfriend who shifted from side to side. 

It wasn’t that they didn’t get each other things, just that they valued experiences. It wasn’t crazy for them to buy each other a book or knickknack while traveling, but they certainly hadn’t given each other anything expensive. 

“It’s not our anniversary,” Clarke reminded her. 

“Don’t worry, I’ll get you something else for that.” 

“That’s not-- You’re impossible.”

“I saw it and thought of you,” Lexa shrugged as Clarke opened the box, a thin bracelet pulled out of it. “It’s not… I saw it and I wanted to get it for you because a year ago today, you showed up and nothing has been the same, and I can’t imagine it being better.” 

Still a little tipsy and overly sentimental about a holiday geared toward torment and misery, Clarke smiled at her girlfriend through her awwwww’s. 

“Help me put it on?” 

“Sure, but I want to see you in only this,” Lexa wiggled her eyebrows. 

“Take me to bed, or lose me forever,” Clarke grinned as Lexa flopped atop her. 

“That was actually Meg Ryan’s line, and not Kel--”

Silenced with a kiss, Lexa melted and forgot to finish correcting her girlfriend. They had a few hours before they needed to be up and she was ready to celebrate.

[tciddaemina]

on law, luffy, and bedtime stories - a random one piece headcanon

okay but, okay but, okay but, has anyone ever thought about what luffy and law’s concepts of bedtime stories must be like? most of the other one piece characters have at least one (fairly) normal adult figure in their upbringing for some portion of their childhood, like usopp and robin had their mothers, nami bellemere, franky had tom, sanji had his mother and then zeff, and chopper had kureha, etc, etc, so you can imagine at at least one point or another they got an idea of your fairly normal concept of bedtimes stories and what you tell kids to help them sleep at night

luffy didn’t though. luffy’s formative years were by and large spent being raised basically single-handled by a pair of feral mountain children, with only minor and occasional intervention by bandits. if luffy was ever told bedtimes stories, it was ace and sabo doing the telling, and god can you imagine? i feel like luffy’s concept of normal bedtime stories would be these incredibly violent and slightly horrific horror stories, like, whatever it is two wild feral preteen boys disillusioned with society and living in the woods think is a) cool and b) scary enough to be worth telling. like, these kids beat people up to steal their money for fun and spend every other day hunting tigers, not to mention that both ace and sabo are literally quite fucked up, traumatized little kids. like, they make it work, but i can’t imagine them telling stories that aren’t immensely fucking disturbing in the way only children's made up stories can so effortlessly be

luffy meanwhile, eats it right up, accepting it without fuss, because the other option is getting teased for being a crybaby, and also he loves them both so much in the respect is imitation kind of way, which means that what they think is cool he also thinks is cool, so he sees absolutely nothing weird about the fact that every time they tell him a bedtime story it’s the sort of plot that could be marketed as an R-18 horror movie. he thinks absolutely nothing of it

and i just like this because it’s the absolute opposite of what you’d expect from luffy, and yet it makes full sense when you consider his upbringing. like, someone ever asks luffy to tell a story and just ends up utterly stupefied at the terrifying horror story he comes out with, because its so utterly unexpected for his bright and cheerful and fairly innocent personality. 

like, between law and luffy, if you had to say one of them was really into horror stories and didn’t know how to tell proper kid’s bedtime stories you’d say it would be law, right? he gives that vibe. sarcastic, jaded, sharp-edged, don’t give a fuck going to spit in the eye of god and cause problems on purpose just because he likes to be a bitch and watch other people clean up the mess. it’s him you’d expect to have this really fucked up notion of it all, especially when you consider the later portion of his childhood post-flevance and the impact that’s had on his life

and this is where it particularly gets fun, because you’d think that right? but you’d be wrong. because before flevance and before the donquixotes and before cora’s death and all of that shit, law was the eight year older brother to a younger sister. and sure, law as a kid may already have been weird and slightly off - he dissects frogs for fucks sake, he was always going to be a character - but he also had a fairly normal family up until a point. his sister, shown to be a sweet somewhat sensitive crybaby (basically just a normal little girl) always asks for bedtime stories, and when law’s parents are busy, he does it instead. but he’s learned from example from his parents, has been on the receiving end of the normal trend of bedtime stories in his own time (even if he wasn’t much enthused by them), and more than that he knows his sister and what sort of stories she likes so Law’s bedtime stories are always these wholesome, sweet tales about princesses and magic and evil curses and true love and friendship saving the day. like, just absolute fucking fluff. it’s not that he likes these sort of stories, he mostly scorns them actually, but he cares about his sister so he sucks it up and tells stories she likes, because if he told the ones he’d like instead she would end up crying. so those are the stories law tells, those are the stories law knows how to tell, because he’s had a lot of practice at it by the end

and so if made to tell a bedtime story (though he’d no doubt go to great efforts to refuse doing so) that’s the sort of story law would come out with, absolutely baffling anyone who has known law for even a fraction of a second, because its trafalgar law. like, what the fuck??  

and i like that. i love that. luffy, who is just such an absolutely cheerful wholesome dude, just putting out these absolute horror stories, while law, cynical, jaded, and sadistic law, tells these really soft moving stories about princesses being saved by the power of true love. it’s so seemingly antithetical to their character, but it isn’t. because maybe it doesn’t speak to them, but it speaks about how they were raised, about who the main figures in their lives were as children and the impacts that these people, now lost, still have on them today

it subverts all expectations, while still making absolute sense for their characters, and fuck if that doesn’t get me. 

[midgardianweasley]

Movie Night

Movie night

Natasha Romanoff x fem!reader

Summary: It’s friday night, or more commonly known as movie night for the Avengers. A horror movie was put on and Y/N isn’t feeling so brave, luckily she’s got a Romanoff nearby.

Warnings: coulrophobia (fear of clowns), mentions of the IT movie and pennywise.

Word Count: 2.5k

Идиоты. - ‘Idiots.’

Requests are open!

“I vote action movie”

“We watched an Action movie last week, Sam.” Steve pinched the bridge of his nose, briefly looking up and meeting my eyes, earning a small smile in return, attempting to provide some sanity for the man.

“Plus, do you not think we’ve had enough action for one week?” Bucky grumbled, this week having taken a toll on everyone. We were all exhausted from our missions, some more than others, the soldier being one of them.

“Okay okay, no action, damn” Sam put his hands up in defeat, accepting that he wasn’t going to win this one. A few more options had been suggested, Bruce suggested rom-com, Thor suggested comedy, Vision proposed a documentary, all of which were shut down with groans and sounds of protest.

I turned to my assassin girlfriend who had been sitting beside me watching the scene unfold with an amused smirk on her face, her green eyes darting around the room whenever someone else spoke and taking sips of the drink she had in her hand. I nudged her slightly to get her attention

“Hey.”

“Hi”

“If it was up to you, what would you choose for movie night?” I asked. She morphed her face into a thoughtful one, still with a slight smile on her face, taking time to make her decision.

“If it was completely up to me? I would-”

“Aha!” Tony interrupted with a loud snap of his fingers. “I know, we haven’t watched a horror movie in a while, and the new IT movie just came out, we can watch that” He smirked, proud of his contribution to the discussion at hand. I looked around the room, praying that they would pick anything else, literally anything, even Vision’s documentary.

Unfortunately, everyone seemed to be really into it as they all shared nod’s and “yeah” “sounds good” before splitting up to go and get their snacks and blankets to bring back to the large sofa.

Although I wouldn't admit it to the rest of the group, I was absolutely terrified of clowns and have been since I was a child. If there was a clown at a birthday party or an event, I’d pretend I was sick so that my mum wouldn’t make me go. She soon noticed a pattern in my behaviour, putting the pieces together and realising that I hadn't come down with the flu three times that month, I was avoiding the ‘entertainment’ of the parties.

She tried explaining that it was just a guy in makeup and a funny suit, showing off fun tricks and jokes. However, 9 year old me still refused to attend, faking a sneeze and hiding under the blanket.

“Woah, Y/L/N, you good over there?” Tony furrowed his brows, concern written all over his face. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

I wish it was a ghost.

I regained my composure, nodding and sending a firm smile his way, hoping that would be enough to prevent any further questioning. With a shrug, he made his way out of the room and caught up with Thor to explain what ‘IT’ was.

“You don’t look so good, sure you’re okay?” Nat placed her hand on my back, rubbing small, reassuring circles with her palm. I wanted to put on a brave face and tell her I was fine, that there wasn’t a problem and my heart wasn’t racing with fear, but the look on her face, while caring and concerned, was also warning me not to lie to her. Not that i’d manage anyway, she always had ways of finding out the truth eventually.

I shook my head, letting out a small sigh and turning in my seat to address her. My eyes met hers and I felt my heart settle slightly just by looking at her, she always made me feel safe.

“What’s wrong sweetheart?” She whispered, her hand coming up to rest on my cheek, her thumb stroking my cheekbone in small movements.

“It’s so silly, really.”

“Nothing is silly if it’s upsetting you Detka. Tell me.”

“It’s this movie.”

The confusion was obvious on her face, yet she stayed quiet, allowing me to elaborate.

“I just, I’ve never been the best with clowns. Ever since I was a child, I’ve had this fear of them. If I saw one, I’d run in the opposite direction, which was more often than one would think. I mean, seriously, who wants one of those things at a party? What happened to princess parties? Or tea parties!” I exclaimed, my tone becoming more intense as I spoke.

Natasha nodded, I could almost see the cogs turning in her head, figuring out how to approach the situation. After a minute or two, she focused her eyes back on me and her hands had trailed down to meet with mine, interlocking them in the process.

“Do you want to skip it tonight?” She suggested.

“No, no, I don’t want to cause a fuss. Plus, I kinda don’t want the others knowing.”

“Are you absolutely sure? I’m sure we can pull a sickie for one night.”

“I’m sure. Just, can you stay next to me? And let me hide if it gets really bad?”

“Of course you can. I’ll be next to you the whole time.”

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

___________________

We were at the haunted house scene in the movie. There had already been jumpscares that I'd managed to avoid for the most part, but I don’t think I've moved past Georgie’s death yet, let alone have time to process the psycho killer clown on the screen.

Eddie was in a room alone, he was staring at this dirty, old fridge and a white hand had appeared, curling itself around and tapping on the side so you could only see it’s fingers. I tugged the blanket that was laid across Natasha and i’s laps and pulled it up to my nose, eyes still on the screen, but prepared to take cover. It appears as though nothing has changed from all those years ago.

As the fridge door creaked open, my blanket had raised higher and higher, my grip tightening by the second while the hand reappeared, this time, you could see it’s entire body contorted into this small space.

“Nope. No, absolutely fucking not. No.” I mumbled, covering my eyes with my fluffy shield. Luckily, Nat had stolen the sofa at the back, meaning I could skip the scary parts without anyone taking much notice, them being too entranced by the movie. Weirdo’s.

In my safety bubble I'd created, I felt my girlfriend’s hand on my thigh, rubbing small circles to reassure me that I was okay, and that she was here. I shuffled a little so I was closer to her, if that was even possible, her then adjusting so that her hand was still on my thigh, but another arm was wrapped securely around me, pulling me into her side a little more.

I assumed we would stay like that for a bit, until she started to shift more noticeably and lifted the part of the blanket closest to her, and put it over her own head, taking me by surprise, a faint gasp leaving my lips when seeing that she’d joined me.

“You doing okay under here?” She spoke softly, a hint of amusement playing on her face as she looked at me folded up into a ball.

“I am. This blanket protects me from all.”

“Of course it does, the fluffier it is, the more protection, right?” She quoted words i’d spoken earlier on when bringing in the blanket for us.

“Are you sure you’re not going to boil under there?”

“Nope. And even if I do, the fluffier the blanket, the more protection from cannibal clowns.” I’d explained proudly. Yes, I'm an Avenger that fights extraterrestrials and demigods and still runs to a blanket for safety, leave me alone.

We stayed under there for a minute or two, holding hands and sharing small kisses while the movie continued and we hid in our little bubble.

“C’mon lovebirds, the movie isn’t over yet, you can continue that when we’ve gone to bed if you must.” Stark called out, causing Natasha to roll her eyes and retreat back to her previous position.

I don’t know what ran through my mind, I clearly didn’t think twice about the situation I was in, my default being to follow Natasha and pull the blanket down and off my head. Upon resurfacing from my cocoon, I looked towards the Television. Bad idea. With a shriek that I'm almost certain could be heard from Asgard, I flew under the blanket again after seeing Pennywise with all of his teeth on show, edging towards Eddie to eat him.

Natasha’s arms wound their way around me again, slightly shaking now from the fright. Even though the blanket tended to muffle sounds, I could hear the room fill with laughter and comments from the Avengers.

“I didn’t know your voice could go that high Y/L/N”

“Pennywise! You scared Y/N!”

“Y/N, it’s literally-”

“How about you guys shut up and watch the movie? Otherwise I swear to god Thor, I’ll bring snakes in here and Sam, I’ll cut the wings off of your suit.” I heard the redhead next to me threaten, alongside some more punishments to the others who laughed, immediately silencing them, all of them knowing that she wasn’t one for an empty threat.

Even though the laughter died down and no more words were spoken, tears still built up in my eyes and were daring to fall down my cheeks. I feel so embarrassed. A room full of superheroes and I was scared to death over a fictional clown in front of all of them.

I tried to keep my sniffles to a minimum and at a level where no one could hear me, however, they seemed to have caught Nat’s attention as she whispered to me, loud enough for me to hear, but quietly so that it was only me that could hear.

“Mind if I come in?”

I chose not to verbally respond, instead, I pulled the edge of the blanket up, allowing her to bend down and make her way underneath. After making herself comfortable, she turned to me and did, what felt like study, my face before tutting under her breath.

“Идиоты. Are you okay?” I smiled at her speaking Russian. She often switched between the two, interchanging within sentences. I’d been around her enough to pick up on some of the terms, funnily enough she’d said that word so often, my understanding was immediate.

“Feeling a bit humiliated” My voice came out weak and slightly gravelly from the crying, her thumb immediately wiped the tears off of my cheeks, lingering afterwards.

“Don’t be. Everyone has their fears, you shouldn’t be embarrassed by having them. Okay? It just means you're human.” She patiently explained, sparking a question to leave my lips before realising.

“Do you have a fear?”

She smiled “mhm”

“Can I know what it is?”

She leaned in closer to me, lips hovering beside my ear so I could feel and hear her breathing quietly.

“Идиоты” She whispered, resulting in me clamping my hand over my mouth to limit the noise my laughter was making.

“There’s that smile I love.” She took my chin in her index finger and her thumb, her face once again, coming closer towards mine before our lips met in the middle, sharing a soft, quick kiss, distracting me from any embarrassment i’d previously felt.

________________

The movie had just finished, everyone was getting up and starting to clear up any mess they’d made, mainly popcorn that had fallen everywhere, Wanda and Vision being the main culprit, jumping at the scary parts had caused a popcorn avalanche near their seats.

Nat and I gathered our blankets and snacks we’d brought in, trying to ignore the slight tension hanging in the air, and just as we were about to walk to our bedroom, I felt a tap on my shoulder. It was Peter.

Rocking back and forth on his heels and fidgeting with his hands, he smiled.

“Hey, uh- miss Y/L/N. Miss Romanoff, sorry, I just wanted to come and make sure you were okay.” He rushed, clearly anxious to approach us considering the telling off Natasha gave everyone earlier.

“I’m okay, thank you Peter. You can call me Y/N by the way, ‘miss’ makes me feel old.” I chuckled, visibly seeing his shoulders relax at my response, he was really sweet, never wanting to get on anyone’s bad side. He’s a good kid.

“Sorry mi-,Y/N, sorry, I’ll remember for next time. That movie was pretty freaky, if there’s anything I can do to help, let me know.”

“I will, thank you.”

Feeling more relaxed, I made a slow but steady beeline for the bedroom, wanting to have cuddles with Nat and go to sleep, hopefully forget the movie ever happened. Soon enough, we were both changed into a vest top, I wore a pair of shorts and Nat wore a pair of sweats and we were in bed, facing each other with our legs tangled together, our noses bumping every so often.

“I love you” I mumbled in between kisses, eyes opening briefly to be met by her green orbs looking back at me.

“I love you more, Detka.”

A silence then overtook the room, only being able to hear the breeze outside and a slight whistle from where it was flying through the trees. I’d usually adore this, finding peace in the wind and the darkness, tonight however, it felt unsettling. All I could hear in my head was the soundtrack to the movie, picturing the bloody teeth and that creepy smile from earlier in my head.

“Love?” I nudged my girlfriend’s nose gently, hoping she was still somewhat awake.

“Mhmm?”

“Can you, can you possibly sing to me?” Her eyes fluttered open, a sleepy smile on her face, wrapping her arms tightly around me before humming a quiet melody, sending me into a blissful sleep.

By noon the next day, I had received apologies from everyone in the compound, a couple of bone crushing hugs from Thor and some complementary pancakes that Wanda had made with some help from Bruce, aprons on and covered in flour. Everyone tucked into their individual stacks, enjoying some lighthearted conversation, Nat taking the opportunity to press a small kiss to the back of my hand, I quickly returned the gesture. It was lovely.

Movie night was a rollercoaster, but at the end of the day, I was surrounded by the best people, and nothing would change that, not even the fear of clowns.

Though they’re still really fucking scary.

taglist: @the-dumbass-that-throws-knives

[froggy-frogz]

Heartbeats [2016 Raph x Gn!Reader]

Request 4 @peybonggoring :

May I request 2016 Raphael trying to make up stupid excuses to hold hands with his s/o? Like “let me feel your heartbeat by holding hands- UHHH NO THAT'S NOT MINE GOING THAT FAST SHIT-“ *runs away*

A/N: I am so sorry :,) thank you for waiting. I feel terrible so I’m making it extra long <3!! Hope you enjoy it!!!

You sigh and hug your coat closer to you, a frown creasing your lips, “I know you guys can’t really go above ground in the daytime but- it’s freezing. Shouldn’t we, maybe go back? Order some pizza? Watch a movie?”

There was a snicker, and you flashed Mikey an upset glare, “Michelangelo, what in the high heavens is so funny?”

“We’re grabbing pizza angelcakes, or more like you’re grabbing them for us. Our regular pizza guy is sick so there’s no other way to get it, you said it yourself, it’s not like we can go in an-” He was promptly shut up via getting playfully smacked.

“I’m going to-” You cut yourself and press the coat closer to you, “Then why couldn’t I just have gone to get it myself, and taken a cab to get there?”

“Because Raph wanted to make sure you were sa-” Another wack to Mikey’s head echoed around the alley. “Shut up Mikey, c’mon babe, let’s go get the pizza already so we can get ya outta this rain.”

Raphael tugged you under his arm, shielding you from most of the cold and you flashed Mikey another glare.

“You three act like children.” Leo grumbles from next to you, “The faster we get the pizza, the faster we can start the movie marathon back home.”

Rolling your eyes you look up to Raphael, “It’s sweet you wanted to make sure I was okay Red, but I can get pizza myself.”

“I just wanted to come with ya, is that such a crime?” He eyes you, “But are ya okay? Ya look freezin.”

“That’s cause I am.” You mumble, cursing Mikey silently. This was probably his idea, and it’s not like Donnie or Leo would object to pizza. Especially if it was from their favorite place.

The four of you trudged in the pouring, freezing rain, Donnie staying behind to set up everything for when you all got back. Lucky him. He was all warm while you were freezing your ass off in the cold New York night, but hey, at least Raph generated a very considerable amount of warmth.

“Raph pauses for a second, takes your hand, before continuing to walk again, tugging you along. You raise an eyebrow and look up at the towering turtle. Huh. That was new. Raph didn’t like to show affection. And you two were in front of Mikey too.

“Heh, ya right, it is starting to get chilly.” Raph mutters, squeezing your hand, but not enough that it would hurt.

You raise an eyebrow, you were pretty sure that he didn’t really get cold. Raph was like a giant heater. Hence why you were pressed up against his body, but hey, you’d take it.

-

“Finally, you guys are back. What took so long?” Donnie asked when you came in holding 3 boxes of pizza, which you were sure you would only get a slice or two of. Three if Raph was feeling nice.

“Mikey.”

“Ah, figures.” Donnie snorts, and takes two of the pizza boxes from you, “Thanks for grabbing them, [Y/n].”

“No problem, now let’s get this marathon on, what movies did you pick out?” You ask as Mikey comes rushing behind you to grab pizza as soon as the boxes made their way onto the counter. Jesus. Mikey would be the death of you. Unless you didn’t strangle him first.

Donnie grabs a couple slices as Mikey is distracted by Leo’s scolding, and passes them to you, “I picked out all the horror movies we haven’t watched with you yet. Raph told me that you haven’t watched a lot of them.”

You spurt, “Horror movies? I’d at least thought we’d watch action or something.”

Not that you didn’t mind horror, but you could get jumpy. What on earth was Raph planning, cause he definitely knew because of a certain time he made you watch The Shining with him.

“C’mon babe, ya don’t have to worry about a thing. I’m right here with you.” Raph says, suddenly appearing behind you with his own very, very full plate of pizza. “What, are you scared?”

“No!” You rush, turning to him, “Let’s just start already-” so we can get this over with.

Raph grinned and hoisted you up in his free hand, making you squeak before carrying you and his pizza to the couch.

“Mikey, Leo, hurry up.” Donnie calls from next to you, reaching for the tv remote, as he had somehow managed to grab pizza amidst the mini-war that started between the two turtles.

You ignore the commotion in the kitchen and turn to the flickering TV, and when The Exorcist popped up onto the screen, you groan and lean into Raph’s arm.

“Here, if you get scared you can hold my hand.” Raph teases, pressing a kiss to your head.

Instead of answering him, you angrily munch on your pizza, muttering curses under your breath, of course, Raph planned this, and y’know what, if he wanted a war too, you would give him one, and you had an idea too.

-

Halfway through the movie, and your nerves already felt frazzled. As Raph had pretty much predicted, you were almost wanting to hold his hand, surely that would help you in this dire situation.

“Babe, ya practically radiating with fear, maybe if ya hold my hand it will go away?” He mumbles as he takes another bite of his pizza.

What the hell?

You grumble to yourself and lean into him again, and you can hear a heartbeat- Raph’s heart was hammering. Was he scared too? No, nothing really scared Raph, er, movie-wise, so it had to be something else. So it couldn’t be the movie.

Mmm-

Giving in to Raph's wanting-to-hold-your-hand, partially for science, and partially for your own damaged nerves [and ego], you take Raph’s hand, and you can hear his heartbeat grow faster.

Bingo- that was it. You grin, no longer focusing on the movie before looking up to him, your plan into motion. “Hey Raphy, this movie is really scary.” You whisper, “Thanks for holding my hand.”

Raph gives you what you think is a nervous grin, “You’re welcome babe.”

When his heart stopped stammering as much, you moved his arm just a bit so you could climb onto his lap, and curl up to his side. You tucked your head under his chin, right where you could hear his heart stammer.

“U.. Uh babe?”

You tighten your grip on his hand, “Don’t worry you big lug,” You whisper so the others don't hear, “You don’t have to be so nervous to give me affection.”

Maybe you owed Mikey an apology, cause this wasn’t bad at all.

[hypmicdaydreams]

Hey! can i order headcanons for Gentaro, Jyushi and Hifumi going to the cinema to see a scary movie with their S/Oc please? Have a good night, love your blog <3

(sorry for any error, i'm using google translator)

Ah man, I can not for the life of me watch a scary movie. They terrify me too much haha. But this was very cute to write! Thank you sm for the request anon, and I hope you enjoy 💕 (and dw, there weren't any errors!)

𝗚𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗿𝗼, 𝗛𝗶𝗳𝘂𝗺𝗶, 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗝𝘆𝘂𝘀𝗵𝗶 𝘀𝗲𝗲𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗮 𝗵𝗼𝗿𝗿𝗼𝗿 𝗺𝗼𝘃𝗶𝗲 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗶𝗿 𝘀/𝗼

-pairings: gentaro yumeno x gn!reader, hifumi izanami x gn!reader, jyushi aimono x gn!reader

-genre: fluff

Gentaro

he wasn’t one to really be frightened by a horror movie as it was nothing more than a story to him, so he found a much deeper appreciation for the storytelling

if a horror movie managed to give him chills or goosebumps (which wasn’t often as of late), then gentaro considered it a success. it must’ve been a rather good watch if he wasn’t able to predict what would happen next or if it managed to catch him off-guard

he adored a good and rather chilling horror movie as much as the next person; unfortunately, however, gentaro found the majority of the more recent horror movies to be nothing but, well, terrible, so it wasn’t his favorite genre

the cheap jump scares or ominous music had no effect on him, and the shallow plot and terrible writing was borderline offensive in his mind. gentaro, more than anyone else, loved a fantastical story with a good plot and stellar writing, and the more recent horror movies were far from that

so when you suggest that the two of you go to the theaters in order to watch the latest horror movie that caught your eye, gentaro is a bit hesitant at first and isn’t expecting much from it

but seeing how you looked quite excited at the prospect of seeing a movie together with him, gentaro agreed to it. this should, at the very least, be fun considering that you’d be with him

when the movie starts, gentaro is watching with an uninterested gaze, already able to tell where this would go, if it was a cliché one or not. and if it was the former, well, he practically zoned out during the movie or tried to rewrite the scenes to make it more interesting

(gentaro never could focus on anything for too long if it wasn’t something he liked)

if you easily got scared by horror movies or if this movie in particular was making you quite frightened, gentaro would catch on to that and discreetly hold your hand in attempt to comfort you throughout, perhaps even throw a funny comment here and there about the terrible quality of it in hopes that’d help (and it lowkey did)

after the movie, you’d be talking about what you thought of the movie, saying how the jump scares took you by surprise and how it took forever to calm your racing heart. when you turn and ask gentaro for his input, he simply shrugs and says that it definitely could’ve better

i feel like he could go off on a whole tangent on how the writing was a bit bland, the characters too two-dimensional, how the horror aspect was clearly lacking. honestly, you’re impressed that he could pick up on all that, though you couldn’t help but tell yourself that it was to be expected

gentaro hated nothing more than a bad story, especially one where it was clear there was absolutely no effort put into it; and as an author himself, it felt somewhat of a personal attack

he never really did talk much, so you’d be surprised if he does start to criticize each aspect of it. though if you were left feeling slightly shaken up by the movie, then it’d help ease you up really. it was sort of a reminder that it wasn’t real

even then, if you had trouble sleeping later that night, gentaro would have no problem reassuring you that he was there and perhaps even tell a story or two of his own

Hifumi

i like to think that he isn’t one that gets scared by horror movies at first glance, instead finding them to be sorta exciting. the jump scares, however cheap, were always thrilling and got his heart racing, in a good way he liked to think

but as night falls, hifumi surely gets a tiny bit frightened as he recalled the events of the movie from a few hours ago. all of a sudden, his slightly open bedroom door and the stillness of the night was just too eerie

still though, horror movies were a guilty pleasure for him, even if they did terrify him a bit afterwards. they were simply too much fun. so when you brought up the idea of going to see a horror movie, hifumi jumped at the prospect of it

he was rather excited, more so at the fact that you guys were going out on a date, and hifumi even suggests the two of you watch it at night in order to heighten the atmosphere and leave more of an impact (a suggestion he may come soon to regret)

hifumi is, well, rather emotive; so throughout the movie, if there was anything that took him by surprise, you could easily tell from the way he slightly jumped or the small, quiet yelps of his that he couldn’t hold back

even then, however, it doesn’t seem to faze him all that much; rather, he seems a bit excited? as if the racing feeling of his heart was way too thrilling

for some reason, i could see hifumi being the type to comment on things during the movie as well, such as mentioning how that particular jump scare took him by surprise or how this scene was giving him goosebumps

it’s not that he’s talkative, but instead, he simply liked to point things out to you

if at any point you were ever starting to feel terrified during the movie, he’d be able to tell and hold your hand for reassurance, maybe even ask with a worried glance whether you wanted to step out or not. hifumi understood that horror movies weren’t for everyone and could make some feel uncomfortable (he’s literally the sweetest, i live by that)

you’d have to reassure him many times that you were fine

regardless of whether or not the movie was bad, hifumi would enjoy it either way. for one, having the experience of watching it on the big screen with you was really what made it special. secondly, it was fun either way

as you guys walk out of the theater, hifumi is talking on and on about the movie and how scary it was, even if it wasn’t that frightening. as aforementioned, he’s quite emotive, so hifumi basically describes how he was feeling throughout the entirety of the movie

and if you admit that you also felt somewhat scared from it, he’d totally agree but then go on to tell you how none of it was real either way, so it was more exciting than anything

despite that, you may find him to be somewhat more antsy at the tiniest noises or find him holding you just a bit tighter when you guys go to bed later that night

Jyushi

needless to say, he and horror movies did not mesh well together, if, at all. just the concept or synopsis of said movies were enough to send a chill down his spine as jyushi couldn’t help but imagine the endless gruesome scenarios that could take place

and at night, well, jyushi could barely sleep without some sort of comfort such as amanda or you since the only thing on his mind was the movie and a multitude intrusive thoughts, not able to help but imagine what’d happen if he or you was ever thrust upon such a scenario (no matter how unrealistic it was)

so jyushi is veryyy reluctant at first to accept your offer to go watch a horror movie at the cinema, especially if it was playing at night. he could barely get through them in the midst of the day; how’d he even fare at night when he could barely see a thing?

but when he saw just how excited you seemed to be about it, especially since you were going to see the long awaited horror movie with your boyfriend, jyushi sorta gave in

besides, he told himself over and over again that it was simply another obstacle for him to grow stronger, a part of his training in a way. it did help ease him somewhat

still though, when you guys finally do go to the cinema, jyushi makes sure that he has amanda with him as well, knowing that he’d need it by the end

when the movie starts, jyushi is pretty much trembling slightly, terrified at what could happen, so you’d have to hold his hand and give him a reassuring smile, telling him that if it was too much, then you guys could leave

this does comfort him, however, and jyushi decides to tough it out and watch it through (honestly, even if you were scared by the movie, jyushi was more so than you)

all throughout the movie, jyushi does have a hard time directly staring at the screen, always shielding his eyes with his hands or closing them each time there was a jump scare of sorts

he was also quite emotive, so each time jyushi saw something frightening, he’d let out a small yelp of sorts, maybe even jump a bit if it really did take him by surprise. it was just a bit too much for him

holds your hand through it all, for good measure, and has amanda close by at all times

at the end of the movie, when you guys walk out of the theater, jyushi is more than thrilled that it’s finally over with, though he did have to admit that it was somewhat fun

when you ask him what he thought about it, despite the fact that jyushi’s emotions are as clear as day given how pale he looked, he’d break out into his v-kei persona and try to put up a front and say that it wasn’t scary in the slightest, if only to impress you, and save for his trembling voice

of course, you can easily see through it, though you may decide to let him have it and tease him by saying how brave he was, much braver than you who got frightened by it (and he certainly grows flustered by this)

afterwards, as the two of you are going to bed, jyushi cuddles you immensely, holding you close and tight given how the movie left him quite shaken up. he may even leave the hallway light on as to provide ample light to ward off the darkness a bit

you might even stroke his hair or give him a little forehead kiss to help calm him, which certainly does do its job. honestly, being wrapped up in each other’s embrace did help ease both of your fears

[classic80sand90smovieloves2]

Meeting and Dating Produce Joe

(My gif)(Requested by @westanimagines )

- You and Joe meet when you get a job at the grocery store and are given a tour of the place by your new manager. 

- After being shown around the floor of the shop, he takes you into the backrooms and introduces you to Randy and the ever interesting Joe; who he has to tap on the shoulder in order to make him realize there’s people behind him since his music is playing so loud. 

- The bespectacled boy tries to play it cool but you can tell he’s a little embarrassed; particularly when his eyes fall on you and your manager explains that you’ll be starting work there the next Monday. 

- You give the man a polite hello before you’re ushered out of the room and whisked away to be shown around the rest of the building; leaving Joe flustered yet realistically unhopeful. 

- As I said before, you start work the next Monday and things go smoothly. You make friends with the other girls on shift and you do the mind numbing work that pertains to a job at a grocery store. 

- When you first start working there, you don’t really talk to Joe all that much. You don’t have a reason to be in his portion of the store most days and you’re new to the job so you’re doing whatever you can to look like a picture perfect employee as you figure out the rules of working there. 

- Once you’re a little more comfortable in your position, you do a bit more wandering and are trusted with more tedious jobs that have you going into the back of the store. That's when you actually start making conversation from time to time. 

- Your conversations are always a bit awkward but you come to realize that that’s …sort of just Joe. Which is why you begin to feel a bit bad for him.

- He’s always detached from everyone, always alone, and though you can’t say for sure that he isn’t the one who’s doing the detaching, you figure that it can’t be easy all the same and make it your mission to be friendly and talk with him. And his pleasant response to your interest in him convinces you that you've done the right thing. 

- Soon enough, he’s latched onto you. Not in a creepy way but in a friendly, ‘you’re the only one who I’m comfortable around and who talks to me’ sort of way. 

- It’s easy to see that you just being there makes his day a whole lot better; and that he looks forward to your little interactions, and though your coworkers certainly find him a bit strange, you begin to find him sort of cute. 

- Surprisingly enough, it doesn’t take Joe a ridiculously long time to shoot his shot. He just randomly asks if you’d want to see a movie with him on Saturday and against your better judgement of dating one of your coworkers, you can’t help but agree. 

- Hey, if there was anyone you’d be able to avoid at work and whose offer is dorkily endearing enough to persuade you into accepting, it’s Joe. 

- So you meet up with him that next Saturday and settle in for a date at the cinema, sharing a popcorn and pretending like you aren’t flattered by/don’t notice his glances towards you. 

- He almost kisses you after the movie as the two of you are saying goodbye but he very obviously loses his nerve and plays it off before the two of you call it a night. And as you’re driving yourself home, you’re surprised by how disappointed you are that he didn’t....

- Though you don’t wind up waiting too long for that kiss since you wind up taking it for yourself a few days later when you’re retrieving something from his area of the shop. 

- You figure that it’s best to get it out of the way to show him that you want him to kiss you so, after he hands you the box of things that you’d came there for, you lean up and peck him on the lips, giving him a cheerful thanks before you leave the room; leaving him an ecstatic mess. 

- And just like that, you’ve got yourself the freshest boy at the grocers. 

- Joe likes to pretend like he’s this cool tough guy but at the same time, he knows that he isn’t; which makes you being with him a big accomplishment in his eyes. He’s incredibly proud that you’ve chosen to be his girlfriend and being your boyfriend makes him feel cool so he loves pda and being able to show you off.  

- Him awkwardly throwing his arm around your shoulder while trying to look all macho. He’s a dork and that’s just something you’ll have to get used to. 

- Kiss his cheek! Kiss his cheek! Seriously, he loves it almost as much as he loves you. 

- Clumsy but sweet kisses. 

- Taking his glasses off so that you can kiss him better. I can’t imagine it would be easy to touch lips with those massive frames in the way. 

- The main pet name he uses is babe and it almost always sounds hilarious whenever it leaves his mouth.  

- Most of the time, when you cuddle, he’s the big spoon. He likes nuzzling into the back of your neck and having you pressed up against him; and he’s tall so it works out quite nicely. 

- Laying your head in each others laps. Oftentimes he’ll snuggle into your lap or stomach, wrapping his arms around the small of your back as your fingers card through his hair. 

- Brushing his hair out of his face. It never seems to bother him but every now and again it bothers the hell out of you. 

- Always having the freshest fruit and vegetables. If your boyfriend doesn’t put aside the best of the bunch when your favorite produce comes in, is he even your boyfriend?

- Spitting watermelon seeds and playing other stupid little games.

- Sliding down the grocery shoot every now and again when you know you aren’t gonna get caught; not that your boss really cares 90% of the time. 

- Making faces at each other.

- Goofing off and not taking yourselves too seriously. 

- Occasionally spooking him when you come to visit since he plays his music so loud. It’s become a highlight of your day to make him momentarily jump out of his skin; you consider it to be you avenging his eardrums. 

- Borrowing his Walkman and cassettes. It’ll definitely take some convincing though, that things practically his baby. 

- Dancing to music and lip syncing to songs.

- You can’t tell me that he doesn’t look like a “little” nerd, which is why I’m making him liking Star Wars and Star Trek and all of those geeky interests a thing. 

- Going to conventions and other nerdy events like that.

- Playing different tabletop games. 

- Movie dates. Something tells me he’d be one of those guys who are scared of horror movies but would try to play it off like he wasn’t…up until he’s clutching your hand all tight and refusing to walk down a dark street.

- Arcade dates.

- Carnival dates. 

- Mall dates. 

- He’s adorably willing to indulge in your more “girly” interests and probably secretly likes them himself.

- Taking naps together; though he strikes me as the type of person who barely gets any sleep so you might just be taking naps at his apartment while he does his own thing.

- Playful competitions.

- Him scaring the shit out of you with his chopping and dicing; to the point where you’re compelled to do his work yourself so that you know he isn’t gonna lose a finger. 

- Eating lunch together and sharing food. You spend pretty much all of your lunch breaks in the backrooms with him.

- Talking with Randy every now and again while you wait for Joe. He appreciates the occasional company and the fact that you can save him some trouble and relay messages to your boyfriend for him. 

- Long conversations about nothing in particular. You can rant to him about whatever you want but I can’t guarantee that he’ll be listening too intently; not that he’s purposefully ignoring you or anything.

- He’s kind of the typical oblivious boyfriend but he’s never malicious in his ignorance. He’s just a goofy dork who doesn’t take notice of subtleties and has trouble concentrating. 

- Letting him brag about his accomplishments; even though you probably know that he’s completely making them up. He’ll probably “come clean” later on in your relationship and you'll have to hold back a laugh while trying to sound sincere when you tell him it’s okay. 

- Him trying to act tough yet borderline hiding behind you when things get scary. 

- Most of the time, Joe doesn’t take notice of any flirtation or suggestive interactions between you and other men so he rarely gets jealous of people. You could openly flirt with a dude and he’d be none the wiser. 

- As much as Joe likes to pretend like he can kick peoples asses, he most certainly cannot so don’t expect him to start any fights in your honor. He’s a bit of a coward so he really isn’t all too protective of you. 

- Joe’s a laidback guy and you sort of knew what you were getting yourself into when you started dating him so the two of you really don’t get into too many fights. If you do have them, they’re a quick argument and an even quicker resolution. 

- Both of you sort of just choose to forget about arguments or you bicker until you come up with a quick “fine.” “fine!” sort of agreement and subsequently forget about the problem. Either way, fights never last long. 

- Joe tells you he loves you pretty much every day; usually when you’re saying goodbye or in other circumstances like that. 

- He might give you the occasional headache but you love him nonetheless. He’s a dork but he’s your dork and you’re gonna stay with him for as long as you can.