#but she broke down crying for some reason 😭

[lucid-fate-if]

Your response to the valentine's ask is very telling istahil 😂😅

It's either Imma joke about it or I'm gonna be scared shitless 🥲

[les4elliewilliams]

bound by love // ex-girlfriend!ellie

☆・・・・☆ ・・・・☆・・・・☆

daily click・palestine masterpost・do not buy any game from naughty dog, neil druckmann is a zionist.

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT.

wc/warnings: 5.6k ; strap-on sex (r!receiving), tribbing, oral (r!receiving), cheating, use of names like whore, slut, baby etc. and toxic relationship. do NOT read if you're sensitive about this kind of stuff!! do not romanticize toxic relationships and run far away from toxic people.

a/n: also first time writing smut so please be kind😭. not proofread so i'm sorry if you find any mistakes

pairing: toxic!ellie, ex-girlfriend!ellie also stalker!ellie???(just ellie stalking your social media and location) and jealous!ellie ig.

☆・・・・☆ ・・・・☆・・・・☆

I know that you're shitty and you're bad for me

But I can't stop thinking 'bout it

✩ You used to console yourself by saying that the problem was not you but her. You believed that she was the one who caused all the issues in the relationship. However, as time passed, you started to realize that the situation was more complex than you initially thought. You began to question your own actions and words and wondered if you could have done things differently. You tried to stay positive by reminding yourself that sometimes things don't work out, and it's okay to move on. But you couldn't move on.

✩ Despite all your efforts to move on and forget about her, you always found yourself drawn back to her for some weird reason. You tried everything you could think of to let her go — you blocked her on every platform you could, hoping it would help you move on, but it never seemed to work. No matter how hard you tried to forget her, you always ended up unblocking her, usually within an hour of blocking her. It was as if you were powerless to resist the pull she had on you, no matter how much you wanted to be free of her.

✩ You were the one who broke up with her, claiming she was too toxic for you. However, you cannot deny that you also had your fair share of faults. Both of you were aware of the toxicity in your relationship, but still, it lasted for three whole years. You often wonder how you were able to tolerate her for so long. She always seemed to go out of her way to provoke you and get a reaction out of you. She would intentionally make you jealous, making nasty comments about other women's bodies to make you insecure and maybe even cry. She loved it when you got possessive and jealous; that was the only way she felt cared for and loved. She constantly needed reassurance, and her overthinking would stop only when you got possessive of her or extremely jealous; it didn't make sense, and she knew it wasn't normal, yet she couldn't help herself. But it wasn't only that. She was also extremely manipulative and a liar. It was a never-ending cycle of negativity, and both of you were caught up in it.

✩ If she was a toxic girlfriend, imagine how toxic she was once you two were broken up. When you broke up with her, you thought you were better off as friends, but soon enough, you started to realize how wrong you were.

✩ Even though she treated you poorly throughout your relationship, you always returned to her. Your love for her was strong, and it seemed as though returning to her was the only thing that felt right. Even though she was responsible for causing you a significant amount of emotional pain, she still felt like home to you — like the person who you could always run to whenever you needed it. She always knew the right thing to say to calm you down, cheer you up, and sometimes even make you cry. That was the thing about Ellie that confused you the most; She could be either the best person ever or the worst.

✩ When something big goes down in your life, she's the one you call up first. It doesn't matter if it's something totally dumb or something that seriously ticks you off, she's the one you rely on for comfort and support, and she's always there to baby you.

"S'okay baby— mhm, you got this," whispering sweet nothings into your ear as you rambled about your day "Want me to beat them up for you? You know I would," and she wasn't kidding, sending whoever made you mad to the ER without you even knowing it. You have always been someone who disliked violence. In fact, you were never the kind of person who would resort to violence, no matter how heated a situation may have been. You've always been the rational one between the two of you, thinking things through before acting. On the other hand, she was more impulsive, acting without much thought or consideration for the consequences of her actions. Anyway, you would find out what Ellie did to your coworker when he showed up with a cast around his arm, threatening to take legal action against her. You always found yourself in the middle of the conflict, pleading with your coworker not to sue Ellie and trying to smooth things over.

✩ Lots of

"you're the hottest girl i've ever dated" "i would take you back in a heartbeat" "i still have a soft spot for you" "best pussy i've ever had"

✩ She'd randomly show up at your place in the middle of the night, pounding on your door, little did you know she'd be pounding into you the second you let her in

"nfuckk— my pussy…s'all mine" Murmuring nonsense into the crook of your neck as she fucked your tight little hole with the new strap she desperately wanted to show you (which became your favorite for obvious reasons). "think anyone else can make you feel like this, hm?" and she wouldn't let you cum if you didn't reply, she wanted to hear you say that you belonged to her and her only.

✩ She constantly checked your social media accounts like a fucking maniac, fearing that you may have moved on or started spending time with other girls. This behavior was not healthy, and she was aware of it. Despite that, she couldn't help herself and even had access to your location, which she used to stalk you whenever you didn't respond to her messages or calls quickly enough. On two separate occasions, she unexpectedly showed up while you were on dates with other girls. At first, you brushed it off as a coincidence, but after the second time, you realized that she still had your location and that her sudden appearance was not coincidental at all. Therefore, you turned off the location sharing. and in no time she was blowing up your phone with texts

"why the fuck would you turn it off?" "moving on already?" "where the fuck do you even think you're going?" "try all you want, but you know who you belong to"

✩ It became increasingly clear that you and her were not meant to be friends. You still belonged to her in her mind — and perhaps it wasn't just in her mind. Deep down, you knew that she was right even though you were no longer together.

✩ Although you had repeatedly told Ellie that you wouldn't get back together, she remained convinced that you would eventually return. Instead of giving up, she actively pursued ways to reconnect with you. She would often surprise you by showing up at your apartment with a bouquet of your favorite flowers or things she knew you would like.

"Ellie, what're you doin' here?" you asked as you saw your ex-girlfriend holding a lovely bouquet of flowers in her hand. You were taken aback as you looked at the bouquet  — it was a Hello Kitty bouquet. You had mentioned this type of bouquet to Ellie before you broke up, and you were surprised that she even listened to you when you kept rambling about how cute it was. You had seen it on Pinterest before and never thought she would remember. Her green eyes met yours, and she scratched the back of her neck before flashing a warm smile your way. She knew you'd love it.  "Hi, angel," she said. She handed you the bouquet and planted a soft kiss on your cheek. Her free hand quickly found its way to your waist. She leaned back enough to gauge your reaction and asked with a cocky smile, "What d'you think?" The sudden appearance of Ellie took you aback, but you couldn't help but admire the bouquet in your hands. The Hello Kitty plushie and the colorful flowers were so cute. You didn't expect her to remember your love for this particular bouquet, but you were grateful that she did. "May I come in?" Her tone was confident, and her eyes shone with a mischievous glint. You couldn't help but wonder what she was up to, but you stepped aside to let her in nonetheless.

✩ She would listen intently to everything you said during your relationship and make mental notes of all the things you wanted or needed. However, she never acted on them until you broke up with her. Suddenly, she would start getting you those things, being the girlfriend you always wanted her to be, trying to convince you to give her another chance. But you weren't stupid; you knew that as soon as you let her back into your life, she would go back to her usual self, and her toxic behavior would come out once again.

✩ She showered you with compliments, gifts, and attention, making you feel like you were the only person in the world that mattered to her. When she realized that her love bombing wasn't working on you, she changed her tactics. She began dating a girl she had always insisted was "just a friend," even though you had always felt insecure about her because you thought she was prettier than you. But Ellie was using this girl only to get to you. She wanted to make you jealous and make you feel like you were missing out on something she could provide. She hoped you would come back to her, begging for another chance. You were devastated and couldn't help but compare yourself to this other girl, wondering what Ellie saw in Dina that she didn't see in you. But as time passed, you began to realize that Ellie was playing games. She didn't care about this girl, or about anyone else for that matter. To her, you were the one that got away, the one that she couldn't have. And so she used this other girl as a pawn in her game, hoping to win you back. But you didn't fall for it.

✩ She just went ahead and started posting pictures with her new girlfriend on Instagram to make sure you saw them and felt like shit. And, well, it worked like a charm. Even though you knew she was doing it on purpose to upset you, it still hurt like hell because she never posted pictures of the two of you together on social media, claiming she preferred to keep things private but as soon as she started dating her new girlfriend, she suddenly started posting about her non-stop, which made you feel even more hurt and insecure.

✩ You realized that cutting ties with Ellie and blocking her from all platforms would have been the wise thing to do. but let's be honest, getting revenge felt much more satisfying than being wise sometimes. You wanted to show her that you were not someone to be toyed with cause that's what you felt like: a toy. You started seeing a girl you had recently met, but you made sure not to make it too obvious. You didn't want Ellie to think you were only doing it to get back at her. Of course not, it had to look natural. You wanted to show her that you had moved on with your life and that you were over her. Even though it was quite the opposite, you weren't over her.

✩ When you began sharing pictures of your new girlfriend, she dropped her fake composed demeanor and started bombarding your phone with messages. You finally had her exactly where you wanted her.

2:33 am "who the fuck is that girl in your story?" 2:34 am "hello?" 2:36 am "answer your goddamn phone" 2:37 am "Why do you even care, Ellie? you're in a relationship." 2:39 am "what the actual fuck" 2:42 am "tell me" 2:46 am "who is she" 2:53 am "My girlfriend."

✩ After that, she vanished from social media and every other platform for nearly a week, leaving you on read. You had mixed emotions about it. On one hand, you felt a sense of pride for getting back at her. It was working because she seemed jealous. On the other hand, there was a part of you that couldn't help but miss her. You longed for her presence and wished she would come back. Her presence wasn't the only thing you longed for; you missed her hands all over your body, touching you just in the right places. She knew you like the back of her hand. She knew exactly how to make you arch your back and make you scream her name.

✩ You couldn't cum. It had been weeks, maybe a month, and your little friend down there was starting to ache. You were horny, so fucking horny, but you couldn't cum. All you could think of was your fucking ex-girlfriend almost as if your pussy had a mind of her own. Not even your favorite toys were helping. it felt good, but you felt like something was missing. You reached out to the nightstand and grabbed your phone, unlocking the screen with a swift gesture and opened the messaging app. It was wrong, so wrong and you knew you would regret it the next day, but you needed her. Your fingers moved effortlessly across the virtual keyboard as you typed a message to her.

 1:15 am "Els, I know it's wrong but"  1:15 am "I'm horny"  1:16 am "I need you, please"

You let out a deep sigh of frustration as ten long minutes ticked by, convinced she wouldn't text you back. The last conversation you had hadn't gone well, and you were starting to think it was all over between the two of you, for real this time. Just as you were about to give up and put your phone back on the nightstand, you heard a familiar chime. Your heart leaped into your throat as you saw that it was her.

1:27 am "lol your little gf can't make you feel good like i do?" 1:29 am "omw"

In just 10 minutes, she was back in your apartment, in your arms, and inside you. It was almost like nothing happened like she hadn't just made you cry for a whole month for getting with the girl who made you deeply insecure. All her 8 inches buried deep into your soaked hole, stretching it out and making it hurt, but it felt good. "Is this what you wanted, hm?" she kept mumbling random things into the crook of your neck, not that you were listening to anything she was saying; she was fucking you dumb, and you couldn't seem to focus on anything else but her thick strap pounding into you relentlessly, hitting your cervix just right. You were a mess, literally. "Ellie...nngfuck.. slow down" you breathed out between incoherent moans, panting like a fucking dog in heat "Take it, slut. Show me how much you missed me." She hissed, thrusting hard into you, all your juices spilling out of your pussy, making a mess on your pink sheets. All she wanted to do was destroy you, mark you as hers.

"C-can't," you whined as pornographic moans left your throat. She groaned deep in her throat, savoring the sounds of pleasure falling from your lips, almost as if her life depended on them. She missed this so much. She missed you so much. She increased the pace, pushing deeper into you each time. Her hands moved to your hips, gripping them tightly as she continued to thrust her hips against yours, her thrusts becoming faster and harder, your breath coming out in heavy gasps. "So fucking tight, baby," she panted, her voice hoarse with need "You belong to me, don't you?" She bit down on your neck, her teeth grazing lightly against your delicate skin, leaving behind a mark as evidence of her claim over you; you whimpered at the sensation. You were hers, no one else's. She wanted to mark you all over, hoping your girlfriend would see the hickeys on your breasts and neck the next day.

All you could do was nod frantically, "m'yours, all yours" you babbled out, painfully arching your back. So fucking incoherent. Especially after promising yourself that you would never let her lay a finger on you ever again. But you were desperate, you needed to cum, and you needed her right now. "That's my girl, only I can fuck you like this, yeah?" Her hands roamed all over your body, pinching your nipples and rubbing your throbbing nub harshly. She wanted to hear you beg for her and admit how much you needed her. She needed you to need her.

"Tell me how much you missed my cock." She demanded, slamming into you again and again. Your high-pitched moans filled the room, each one driving her wilder. She could feel her own climax building as her clit bumped against the back of her strap with each thrust; the sound of your pleas combined with the tightness of your pussy around her strap-on were enough to push her closer and closer to the edge. You felt that familiar sensation build in your stomach; you were close. "Soo much, ahhh!...missed it, yeah.." you couldn't even put together a proper sentence. Her grip on your hips tightened, tugging slightly as she continued to thrust into you, hitting the spot that had you rolling your eyes into the back of your skull, over and over until you couldn't hold back anymore.

"That's it, whore. Cum for me. You don't belong to anyone else," she snarled, her voice laced with possession. She knew just what to do or say to push you over the edge, and it worked every single time; that's why you ran to her whenever you needed a good fuck. She could feel your body tensing up and your pretty pussy clenching around her strap-on. You came simultaneously, your combined moans filling your cozy bedroom, her well-defined abdominal muscles glistening with a thin layer of sweat. She rolled you over, so now you were on top of her, riding out your orgasm on her silicone cock as she ground her clit against the back of her strap.  "Oooh fuuuck!" you cried out as pretty moans left your mouth. She took in the sight of you on top of her, her strap still buried deep inside you, riding her cock; your tits bounced as you did so, a sight that she loved. No one did it like you. No one was remotely as good as you. She took a glimpse of your cum sliding down the strap, you were so fucking wet, and nasty wet sounds filled the room, but she loved it. "Fuck, baby," she groaned, clenching her teeth tightly together, causing her jaw muscles to bulge prominently. Her hands gripped your hips, guiding you as you moved your hips, setting the pace, your eyes locked on hers the entire time. Her fingers dug into your skin, leaving small marks that she knew would fade within hours but would always remind her of this moment. Her veiny hand reached up, grabbing one of your breasts, squeezing it firmly and twisting the nipple between her fingers. Your breath came out in ragged gasps, her eyes never leaving yours as she watched you take her cock like the fucking slut you were. "Taking me so well, such a good girl f'me, aren't ya?"

"El..." you whined as she toyed with your nipple. You weren't going to last long; you were still sensitive and your pussy couldn't handle it. "'m gonna cum again!" you cried out once again, bouncing faster on her thick strap. She watched you with unabashed hunger, her eyes never leaving your body as it moved above her. She thrust up, meeting your movements, pushing you closer to the edge. The sight of your tits bouncing in time with your thrusts and the strap disappearing inside your juicy-coated pussy almost made Ellie cum right then and there. Your thighs started to tremble, and she could feel you clench around her dick; your gasps and moans becoming more frequent. She wasted no time, her fingers digging into your hips as she slammed you down on her strap, making you cry out her name, "Just like that, yeah...take it."

When you finally collapsed against her, panting heavily, Ellie couldn't help but smile. "Mine," she rasped, her voice thick with possession and satisfaction. As your bodies finally came down from their highs, breaths slowly returning to normal, she pulled out of you, leaving your wet and sore pussy gaping open. You whined at the sensation, suddenly feeling empty.

The smile plastered on her face faded as you pulled away, the coldness in your voice seeping into the air between you two as you told her to return to her girlfriend. She reluctantly mimicked your movements and sat up, breathing heavily, her chest rising and falling rapidly. Her eyes met yours, searching for any trace of warmth or affection, but all she found was distance. She grabbed her clothes and started to dress herself quickly, trying to calm down, her movements precise and controlled, hiding the hurt and anger she felt at your words. She was confused. You had called her, and she thought you were ready to take her back into your life. She wasn't expecting you to discard her like a toy. "I see how it is," she muttered, her voice cold and distant. She gathered her belongings, not meeting your gaze. "I shouldn't have come here." When she was fully clothed, Ellie turned to face you, her eyes filled with regret and anger.

"Yeah, you shouldn't have," your tone coming off as sharp and cold. You put your shirt on, struggling to process what happened. You missed her so fucking much, and the sex with her was also something you missed a lot. You knew she was right when she told you that no one could fuck you like she did; your girlfriend couldn't even make you cum, while Ellie knew precisely how to touch you to make you feel good. "Can't believe it...Dina, really?" you muttered under your breath as you got dressed, catching her off guard. Your outburst was so sudden neither you could understand it. She could sense the jealousy in your voice and knew exactly what was going on, and the realization made her feel a twinge of satisfaction. "Is this what it's all about? Me fucking with Dina?" she scoffed, her eyes rolling in annoyance. But despite her outward annoyance, she was secretly glad you still cared and got jealous. It meant that you had never indeed gotten over her. You struggled to maintain eye contact with her, the words "Just…get out" barely escaped your lips. You felt a burning sense of shame for letting your jealousy get the best of you, but at the same time, you couldn't help but release all the pent-up emotions you had been holding in for so long.

She snorted from her nose, shaking her head in disbelief, almost amused by all this "Just say the word, and I'll dump her ass," she said in a flat tone, her emerald green eyes staring right back at you as she placed her hands on her hips. You could tell she was serious, as there was a hint of desperation in her voice. She was hoping you'd ask her to drop Dina's ass and come back to you, but of course, you didn't. "I would do anything for you" desperate, so fucking desperate. You let out a deep sigh and firmly shook your head, looking into her eyes. You could see the pain and desperation in her gaze, but you couldn't just let her back into your life like that. "Go," you repeated yourself. "Fine, whatever," she sounded so pissed, disappointed. For a moment, you wanted to take your words back, but you knew that letting her into your life again was the worst idea ever.

✩ That night only made it incredibly difficult for you to move on from her (not that you could before), but she was all you could think of. You found yourself constantly yearning for her at every moment of the day. You'd often text her, and she would always come over, no matter what she was in the middle of. She was willing to drop everything to be with you and 8 inches inside you or between your thighs. Even if she was out with Dina, she didn't seem to care — it became obvious that something was going on between you and Ellie. You couldn't understand how Dina couldn't tell that Ellie was cheating on her with you.

6:34 pm "Baby, need you" 6:36 pm "I'm so wet, been thinking about you all day :(" 6:37 pm "proof??"

✩ One of the things you used to do quite regularly was sending her nudes. You would send her nudes on Snapchat unexpectedly, mostly to surprise her or get some sort of reaction from her. Sending snaps to tease her was one of your favorite things to do. Whether it was a picture of you in sexy lingerie or a video of you playing with your pussy, riding the purple strap she had left at your place weeks ago. You loved making her horny, and it always worked. She would always end up knocking at your door, eager to fuck you or eat you out.

"Teasin' me like that in public — tsskk," She mumbled against your throbbing core as she teased your clit with her tongue. Your legs were on her shoulders, and you watched her head disappear between your thighs. Your fingers tightly gripped into her auburn hair as she devoured like a starved animal, so pussy drunk. But even in that state, she was such a sight.

✩ You were the only one she could think about, even when fucking her girlfriend. Her mind too fixated on the cute little whimpers that left your mouth when she was inside you or sucking on your clit. The way your legs trembled when you were close, your hips jerking away from her when it became too much for you. No one could make her wet like you did, it was a fucking curse having to fuck someone else while thinking of you, hoping that would be enough to trick her brain into thinking she was fucking you instead.

✩ She would save each of your snaps into her phone's gallery and meticulously organize them into a special and hidden folder she had created just for you. This folder contained not just your nudes but plenty of other stuff — from intimate pictures you'd send her to videos she'd take while fucking you. She would go through the folder occasionally for personal use (iykwim).

✩ Your girlfriend was quick to pick up on something odd going on. She'd notice how you would turn your phone upside down, making sure the screen was facing whatever surface to make sure she wouldn't see your ex-girlfriend spamming your phone with texts (she would do it on purpose, by the way). That's how she knew something was up, but for some odd reason, she brushed it off.

✩ She was fed up with your stupid girlfriend constantly in the way. Why weren't you breaking up with her already? She couldn't understand; she was trying to be the best version of herself for you, yet you were still not hers. She tried everything to get you caught, like texting you while your girlfriend was around, sending you risky snaps, calling you...but nothing seemed to be working. So, she decided to hurry things up by texting your girlfriend and sending her some evidence.

She selected a video from her gallery to send to your girlfriend, writing a text message to go along with it before hitting the 'send' button "is this ur girl?" In the video, she was strapping you from behind, and you were telling her exactly what she needed to hear, "Better than your stupid girlfriend, yeah?" "Y-yes. Oooh fuckk. nhhmmm...faster, please" "Can she fuck you like this, hmm?" "No one can fuck me like y-you do...pleaseplease faster"

✩ Your girlfriend felt hurt and betrayed after realizing that you were using her to make your ex jealous, and she ended things between you two. You didn't seem to be affected by the breakup significantly, as if you had been expecting it all along. Honestly, it was almost as if the relationship never existed to you.

✩ Despite feeling indifferent towards your recent breakup, you were furious that Ellie had been the one who caused the end of your relationship. Who was she to control your life in such a way? Well, she couldn't give a fuck, to be quite honest. Seeing you with other girls consumed her from the inside. Nevertheless, she did not break up with Dina.

✩ But of course, you couldn't just let it slide. You already had a plan.

You were at Ellie's place, your back pressed onto her messy blankets, your leg on top of her shoulder as she held the other one firm, adjusting herself on top of you, to be more precise... on your pussy; grinding her wet pussy against your dripping cunt as filthy wet sounds and whimpers echoed in the room. Her hips moved in a slow motion, her green forest eyes fixated on yours. You reached to her nightstand to grab her phone, "Can I...nghhm... record us, baby?" you managed to utter between soft moans as she rode you, her movements became more desperate, chasing her own orgasm. "Record how good m'fuckin' this pussy?" her voice was husky, her breath ragged. Her head rolled back as she continued to grind against you, moaning at the friction, and her eyes fluttered shut. You unlocked her phone and quickly went through her contacts, pressing on Dina's name to start the call. Although the plan seemed foolish and overused, it worked out perfectly.

Dina appeared at Ellie's doorstep in no time to shout at her while you listened from her bedroom. You were amused by the drama that was unfolding before you. It was entertaining to watch Ellie deny the evidence. Dina's voice rose higher and higher as she accused her of sleeping with her ex. When Dina stormed out of the apartment and slammed the front door behind her, you emerged from your hiding spot and leaned against the doorframe, gazing at her with a mischievous grin on your face. Your arms were crossed over your chest as you watched her, waiting to see her reaction. When she turned to look at you, her face etched with confusion and surprise. You shrugged nonchalantly and said, "My finger slipped," with a lopsided smile.

She snorted and shook her head, but you could see the amusement in her expression, "Such a bitch," she said, though you could tell she was trying to suppress a smile. For some reason, she couldn't help but find it funny, she knew she deserved it.

✩ She gradually made her way back into your life, taking slow but steady steps to regain your trust and affection. And before you knew it, she asked you to be her girlfriend again. You hesitated at first but eventually gave in to the strong feelings you still had for her. The first few months of your second chance together seemed to be going smoothly, or so you thought. Then, one day, out of the blue, she broke up with you, claiming that she needed a break from the relationship.

✩ Your heart was shattered into countless pieces, struggling to comprehend where it had all gone wrong. And to make things worse, it seemed like you were the only one suffering, while she appeared to be completely fine, almost as if she were unbothered by the whole situation. You had poured your heart out, begging her to give your relationship another try, but she seemed to be holding back, almost...distant.

✩ But that didn't stop you; you were determined to win her back. You tried everything in your power to get her to love you again, just like she used to do when she wanted to win you back. You started showing up at her place unannounced, always with little surprises for her: her favorite snacks, flowers, handmade stuff, and love letters. But unfortunately, all your efforts seemed to be in vain. The more you tried, the more she pushed you away. You couldn't tell how she had switched so fast and went from doing anything to get back with you to this. 

✩ When you asked her for an explanation, she said she felt emotionally unavailable. She went on to say that she wasn't sure if she still loved you and that she needed a break. You could see the hurt in her eyes and feel the weight of her words as they slowly sank in. It was a devastating blow that left you feeling utterly destroyed. The pain you felt was almost too much to bear.

✩ She promised to come back to you once she felt better. Months passed, and she didn't return. You were left feeling lost and heartbroken, struggling to cope with the pain of the breakup. To move on, you tried to distract yourself with other things, keeping yourself busy with work, hobbies, and spending time with friends. As time went on, you slowly began to heal and accept that it was over. When she unexpectedly came back, you were already over her.

"im ready to give us another try" "Ellie, it's been a fucking year." "and?"

[igotlovestruck]

right where you left lover girl [ charles leclerc , ben chilwell ]

[ 𝗣𝗔𝗜𝗥𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗖𝗛𝗔𝗥𝗔𝗖𝗧𝗘𝗥𝗦 ] — charles leclerc x singer!ex!reader ; ben chilwell x singer!reader . ⊹ ✶ ㄔ 🫂 °.   *

[ 𝗗𝗘𝗧𝗔𝗜𝗟𝗦 & 𝗪𝗔𝗥𝗡𝗜𝗡𝗚𝗦 ] — mostly angst, some romance . ⊹ ✶ ㄔ ℹ️ °.   *

࣪˖ 💭 .. 𝗘𝗬𝗔’𝗦 𝗡𝗢𝗧𝗘𝗦 ⌕ clearing my drafts again 😵‍💫 if you ask me, i’m obsessed with singer!reader fics lol

this work is purely fictional. names, characters, places and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. © httpsuniverse, 2023. do not steal, repost in other platforms, translate and/or claim this work as your own.

cleclercsource

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cleclercsource double date in wimbledon 🎾 charles, alex, kika and pierre spotted in today’s game!

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user alex looks so pretty and i know she’s nice because i met her once, but i miss y/n ☹️

user :(( i do too, but it’s just not meant to be. they both want different things and are in different places in the relationship

user damn why did THAT hurt

user no offense/hate towards alex but the fact that y/n and charles have been together since they were thirteen just...pains me and i’m not even part of their relationship

user me too!! 😭 they literally went through ups and downs together and saw their careers go big :(

user yeah but i hate to break it to you guys but it’s been two years since they broke up and charles being in a new relationship is okay, they’re both adults! i mean, you guys know that eventually they’ll meet somebody, no?

user what pains me the most is that y/n hasn’t released anything since she and charles broke hp 😣💔 i miss my girl

user they look like mean girls

user i would be scared to walk past them

user love how alex is just happy to be there hahaha she’s so cute

yourusername

liked by yourlabel, sabrinacarpenter, selenagomez and 3,286,048 others

yourusername oh hi hello 👋🏻 i know it’s been a while since i’ve last released music and contributed to the industry, and i see everyone’s tweets saying how much they miss me and guess what? i missed you guys too, so here’s a little something for being so patient with me🤎 this song is very personal and important to me and i hope you’ll love it just how i loved writing it. right where you left me is now available to all streaming platforms 🎶

view all 150,837 comments

sabrinacarpenter 🫶 masterpiece

selenagomez proud of you✨😍

user omg y/n!!!

user the queen is back :( welcome back y/n!!

user streaming right NOW

user you cant do this to me y/n y/l/n!!!!!!!

user just got out of a 4-year relationship today, thanks for the masterpiece maam <3

yourusername 🤎 wish you all the best with healing

user OMG

user thanks y/n, now i do have a reason to cry today 😍

yourusername stopp bahahaha enjoyyy

prodbymika

250,297 likes

prodbymika glad to have produced another song and film a music video with my bestie 🫶 here’s some behind the scenes of y/n during recording and filming the music video of right where you left me <3

view all 17,926 comments

yourusername mika my love!!! ☹️🤎 thank youu couldn’t have done it without youuuu 🫶

user wait that place on the 3rd photo is familiar

user it’s charles and y/n’s place from their 24 hour with vogue video 😭

user omfg that’s probably why it’s titled right where you left me 😭

user the 😭 restaurant 😭 she 😭 and 😭 charles 😭 loved 😭

user fuck me im trying to move on 😭

user y/n wearing the same clothes she would wear during date nights with charles 💔☹️

yourprivate

yourprivate i know eventually it will lead to one of us meeting someone new. i hope she’ll love you the way that i did, more than how i loved you, charles. and i can’t believe that it’s been two years since we broke up. in my mind i’m still 23, living in my own delusion that one day you’ll come back to me. i loved you, charles_leclerc. and i still do. i really meant it when i said i wish you both the best. now, it’s time for me to move on and leave the place where you left me.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ─────────────────

yourusername

1,926,472 likes

yourusername me doing big girl things 😄 bye bye monaco 🇲🇨, hello london 🇬🇧 ready to make new memories, new songs and of course, new apartment tour video soon :p

view all 1,827 comments

user omggggggg the chances of me running to you are HIGHHHHH

yourusername see you aroundddd <3

user AAAAAAA

user omg omg omg she’s finally out of her delusions, we’re officially over right were you left me era !!!!!!

user she finally let go of the house she and charles shared 😭

user no bc imagine the adjustment!! she lived there even when she and charles broke up :(

user my girl can finally FINALLY breathe

benchilwell

liked by masonmount, reecejames, judebellingham and others

benchilwell you’re my, my, my, my lover 🩷

view all 23,816 comments

jackgrealish mate, that’s so cheesy 😂

reecejames i know something you don’t 🤧

masonmount i know something you will never know 😂

user NAHHHH QUIT PLAYING WITH US

user NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

user cong😭ratu😭lations😭

user now who is the lucky woman 🤔

user wait is that y/n

user what the hell

user i think soo!!!!

user STOP IM GONNA FUCKING CRY RN

yourusername

liked by cmpulisic, reecejames, masonmount, benchilwell and others

yourusername guys meet my london boy 🩷

view all 28,493 comments

benchilwell i told you not to post that picture of me

yourusername 😵‍💫 but you looked so cute and you helped me compose a song

masonmount he did? 😨

yourusername took us a while, but yep 🫡

user im so happy for you y/n!!!!

— ❤️ by yourusername

user why is y/n, a person who loves chinese food, dating a man who hasn’t eaten chinese food

yourusername don’t worry, i bought chinese the other day. he’s no longer chinese food virgin. i took his virginity.

benchilwell y/n y/l/n.

yourusername 😚 you liked it though

benchilwell okay fine yeah

user why do i feel like a new album will come out ...

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, benchilwell, prodbymika and 4,836,917 others

yourusername suprise (well... not so surprise haha) !! been working on this album the past year and it’s finally here and i can’t wait to share it with you guys so HERE YA GO 🩷😚 the whole album is dedicated to, of course, my lover, my benji, benchilwell i love youuuu and this album is my love letter to you (you spoiled the lyrics on your previous post 🙄 but its ok i forgive u now pls come back faster bc i miss u) enjoy everyone ! lover girl, y/n 🩷✨

view all 56,826 comments

benchilwell i love you angel 🩷

yourusername stopp im shy i miss you

benchilwell 😂 im coming over

user y/n in her lover era 🥹 happy for her, she deserves this!

user she really does 🥹

user STOPPP THIS WJOLE ALBUM IS JUST Y/N AND BEN BEING IN LOVENWITH EACH OTHER

user “all that you ever wanted from me was sweet nothing” BENJAMIN JAMES CHILWELL YOU ONE LUCKY MF

user y/n is SO in love i’m here for it

charles_leclerc congratulations on another amazing album, y/n!

yourusername thank you charles! 🫶

user HEY WHAT IS MR. RIGHT WHERE YOU LEFT ME DOING HERE

user ARIANA WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE

yourusername we’re still friends guys, chill 😂

sabrinacarpenter YOU ARE AMAZING, Y/N

yourusername SAAAABBBB i love you ,, you are amazing

user from right where you left me to paper rings 🥺 THE GLOW UP

[asagaciousmind]

TOUR THOUGHTS

Saw the Les Miserables Tour at the Princess of Wales Theatre in Toronto on May 21 2024; here are my thoughts (Long read, sorry I have a lot of feelings)

Prologue/Look Down/Valjean's Soliloquy

We got like, holographic waves crashing and the men are rowing a boat LIKE THEY'RE SUPPOSED TO BE it's awesome

Oh my god the pipes on the background actors were so good. THE SUN IS STRONG ITS HOT AS HEEELLL BELOW

I miss Javert's stupid guard hat. Was bareheaded as he gave Valjean his yellow ticket

PETIT GERVAIS?????????? Valjean steals a little boy's coin when he's roaming the countryside 😭

Randy Jeter as the Bishop blew me away. Not just his voice but his acting was FANTASTIC every single movement was like. I am an old bishop. This is how an old bishop moves. Idk idk it was really good

Nick Cartell did a great job w Valjean overall, but I totally loved him as pre-MsurM Valjean the most. He acts like a feral animal, grabbing the wine out of the nun's hands and the bread from the priest all hunched over and practically snarling - very very cool and awesome

At the End of the Day

Not a negative but when we went to At the End of the Day there was very minimal lighting and my first thought was Oh no the lighting broke hope they fix it and we don't have to have a brief intermission but then when they went 'At the end of the day there's another day dawning' the lights went up and I was like OHHHHHHHHHHHH so that's just me not understanding lighting direction

Foreman killed it, so did all of the factory workers I love all the interactions and ad-libbing in the background it makes me so happy to see

Every time I saw a tall graceful ensemble member I was like '"That's Kyle Adams" and 8/10 times I was right. Otherwise it was Daniel Gerard Bittner

I Dreamed A Dream

OKKKK VOCALS???? Haley Dortch has such a beautiful, clear, emotional sound and she left not a dry eye in the house. Literally the second intermission hit my parents and myself were like. Holy shit dude what about that Fantine

I got her autograph after the show and she was so so sweet 🥺 She accidentally messed up her signature and had to redo it and was apologising to me and I was like GIRL you brought the house down you could stab me right now and I'd be like 'Thanks have a good one'

Lovely Ladies / Fantine's Arrest

Bamatabois (David Andino) was a standout performance, really chewed the scenery and I adored every second he was on stage (Plus his costume was fantastic)

The other girls defending Fantine 🥺

I like that after the police show up and they basically arrest all of the ladies and pimps, regular well-off citizens come out to witness Valjean defending Fantine from Javert. Thought it was a nice touch

Fantine's Death

My first and only cry of the evening, Haley Dortch no one does it like you

The Confrontation

If you've heard me talk about the confrontation you'll know that I absolutely hate the new chain choreography, HOWEVER. I really really liked it this time. Preston in particular gave it a lot of physicality that I enjoyed

Nick Cartell is a little guy and I don't really believe that his Valjean managed to knock out Preston's Javert

For some reason the percussion was really loud and I could barely hear the vocals so I don't have many thoughts on them

Master of the House / Waltz of Treachery

MATT CROWLE YOU WILL ALWAYS BE FAMOUS

Both Thenardiers were fantastic, not a crazy amount of ad-libbing but when they did they made it count ("BYE, BAGUETTE")

Madame in particular was hilarious

Master of the House is very busy in a good way, everywhere you look interesting things are happening. Another number where the ensemble shines and you can tell everyone is having a blast

The Bargain was funny as hell, Thenardier tells Cosette to die in his arms and she goes limp when he's saying she's 'often been ill'

Valjean gives Cosette Catherine!

Look Down / The Robbery

Gavroche was super charismatic and confident, really great child actor (Milo Maharlika)

Eponine tosses Marius' book across the stage and he goes "I like the way you always ... tease 😐" They're such cute friends together

After Enjolras and the boys are done their preaching Enjolras gets stopped by a policeman and is told off 😭

During the robbery Montparnasse keeps Marius away by brandishing his little knife at him which I thought was cute

Also! Montparnasse is the only member of Thenardier's gang to escape during the Robbery!!! Which is a nice Brick reference

After Thenardier's 'In the absense of a victim' spiel he does this exact pose

Gavroche's little 'Clear the streets' 🫡moment is so cute

Stars

God I love Preston Truman Boyd

His Javert is so stalwart and reserved and dedicated, he's kind of robocop and it really really works, and you get to see just a smidge of vulnerability peek out in this song

ABC Cafe / Red and Black

I DON'T REMEMBER A LOT bare with me

Grantaire was absolutely the standout. Slapped Marius' butt with his coat. Stuck his wine bottle dick in Enjolras' face. Offered Combeferre a sip of his wine (who reluctantly accepted). Blew a kiss at Enjolras

Kyle Adams physicality is probably my favourite aspect of his Grantaire - he moves very assuredly, like a cat, in a way that is like okay he's drunk but he's so used to being drunk that his stumbling is more like dancing. I remember reading a fic that described Grantaire's movements in a similar way and I wonder if that was one of the fics Kyle took inspiration from?

OOH they did the wine bottle keep-away thing with Grantaire and Marius which I didn't know they still did so that was exciting

J.T Wood is such a cute Joly I love his voice

In Do You Hear the People Sing Grantaire grabs a gun and holds it at arms-length like it has cooties before handing it off to another student

Combeferre waves the flag both times (Here and in One Day More) and I'm not sure if it's always Combeferre who does that or if it's because Andrew Marks Maughan is clearly the most physically strong of the Barricade Boys

In My Life / A Heart Full of Love

Delaney Guyer is a really good Cosette in that she has a gorgeous voice and also has a lot of personality and actually reacts to things going on around her

Marius (who was played by Christopher James Tamayo for this performance) is such a cute little nerd. You can see him try to figure out what he's going to do, then he throws a rock at Cosette's window and kind of cringes at the noise - he's so unsure of himself and awkward

Cosette is very excited that he's here and closes the window right away, which prompts Marius' 'I'm doing everything all wrong!' until she reappears downstairs and they get to be cute dorks in love

Attack on Rue Plumet

I don't remember a lot but I DO remember that Eponine was really good here

When Valjean is like 'Tomorrow we'll away' Cosette goes 'WHAT? NO!'

David Andino is so good as Babet he is a chronic scene stealer at this point

One Day More

If you know Another thing about me you know I hate the One Day More box-step but it actually did not bug me this time. They put Grantaire next to Enjolras for the marching portion which is cute

On My Own

Holy shit Mya Rena Hunter delivered the most heartbreaking and powerful rendition of this I've ever heard

The Barricade

Loved Feuilly in his little part

Javert is a good spy. If I didn't know the plot of Les Mis I would've been like Holy shit that's Javert? Crazy. I love him drawing the 'plans' he'd overheard into the ground with a stick

Gavroche flipping Javert off >>>>>

Buff Combeferre is one of the two to drag Javert away to be tied up lol

A Little Fall of Rain

The only version of ALFoR that actually made me feel something

Marius and Eponine get a lot of time to be cute together before the barricade actually notices that she's dying - and Gavroche is the first to notice and gets a front row seat to her death which is heartbreaking

The First Attack

Grantaire's "AND SO THE WAR WAS WON!" was sooo scathingly sarcastic

Javert waited, like, 30 seconds to leave after Valjean freed him, with his back almost against the barrel of Valjean's gun as if he were hoping to be shot

When the gun went off the entire barricade abruptly snapped their heads to look at Valjean and the audience laughed 😭

Telling Valjean 'Well done' for shooting a tied up hostage is a strange choice

Drink With Me

I still hate 'For certain as the eagle flies' I think it's the dumbest line in the entire musical

Grantaire's part was very grand - His voice has like noticeably changed at this point in the musical to give it a sort of hoarse hopeless quality to it which absolutely hits you in the feels

Enjolras comforted him and I swear Grantaire let his hand linger on his cheek for a few seconds longer than normal before pushing him away

Gavroche hugged Grantaire from behind and Grantaire couldn't even turn around at first because he was so distraught and kind of blindly reached for him 😭

Chris Tamayo's Marius is such a poor little meow meow

Bring Him Home

Absolutely jaw-dropping performance from Nick Cartell

He sings Bring Him Home like it's a lullaby - which it's supposed to be

I don't exaggerate when I say that the applause went on for about a minute straight, and was the loudest of the night by far

Death of Gavroche / The Final Battle

Oh poor thang

Grantaire near the end of Gavroche's singing was turned away facing the audience like he knew Gav was going to die and couldn't bear to watch 🥺

Later on in the final battle Grantaire spends most of the time next to Gavroche's body in like a catatonic state

The SPOTLIGHTS representing BULLETS as Les Amis died almost made me lose it

Grantaire dies last, I'm sure he said something before he started climbing the barricade but I couldn't hear it 😭He and Enjolras still have their moment over Marius' body

The Sewer

Javert comes across Enjolras' cart-carried body (Still hate the cart but I can learn to appreciate it) and looks a bit uncomfortable

Then he stumbles upon Gavroche's corpse, kneels, and does the sign of the cross over him

Almost made me cry ngl

DOG EATS DOG WAS SO GOOD I LOVED IT

Javert looked like he wanted to shoot Valjean as he walked away with Marius

Javert's Suicide

HOOOOOOLYYYY SHIIIIITTTTT

It was so good

Preston Truman Boyd you will always be famous I fully believe that Javert had completely lost his mind at this point in the play

I don't have many thoughts on the rest but I loved Marius and Cosette reading Valjean's confession as he walked away with Fantine - and the Bishop hugging him as he arrives in heaven

Also Kyle Adams as Major Domo mincing about the stage in The Wedding was an absolute delight

Am very sleepy now but overall 10/10 I love this cast so much

[da-rulah]

Hi hon, 👋

This is a bit of a weird request so feel free to ignore hahah 💖

Could I request the ghouls comforting reader after a bad break up, and her just being a crying self conscious mess? Like she really needs the comfort but doesn’t even want anyone to look at her?

And the ghouls don’t understand so they just gently ask her what happened and she admits after a while it’s because her now ex bf didn’t think her more intimate parts were attractive so now she feels really self conscious?

Just some gentle fluffy comfort, cuddles and praise?

Not projecting at all 😭

Love u 🫂

Hey lovely - First of all, I'm so sorry you're going through this right now. Just know that whoever the fuck has said that to you or has treated you like this? Karma is coming for them. She'll take them down.

Wishing you a speedy healing from this and sending you love. I hope this is of some comfort 🖤

As soon as Swiss and Sodo had heard, they'd grabbed Phantom by his horn from the dinner hall and collected Rain along the way. They were at your door within minutes.

Mountain - who'd seen you crying on your way back to your dorm and got the word to the others to come, now - opened your door to them, and came to sit on your couch with you again.

He hadn't managed to prise your hands from your face as you'd cried, hadn't been granted permission to look at you - you wouldn't let him. You were too humiliated already, you didn't need any more reason to be.

In a flash, Phantom was at your feet, hugging himself close to your legs without a word. Rain sat on your opposite side, Sodo standing tall (as he could, bless him) behind you like a protective bodyguard and Swiss making a bee-line for the kitchen to brew you some calming tea.

"Guys please... Can I just be on my own?" you sobbed into your hands, "this is humiliating enough."

"Under no circumstances," Mountain told you, shuffling closer and wrapping an arm around your shoulders. "And you have nothing to be embarrassed about."

Swiss came and tapped your shoulder, cup of tea in his other hand. You turned to look behind you, still hiding most of your face and burst into tears again at the sweet gesture. You took the mug from him, hanging your head low so your face was hidden behind a curtain. Phantom lay his head back against your knee, blowing the hanging strands in an attempt to see you, but to make you smile too. It was starting to work...

"You wanna tell us what that asshole did so we can rub it in when we beat his ass in the halls?" Swiss asked, leaning on his hands along the back of the couch next to Sodo.

"We... we just broke up, it's... fine..." you lied. But your vocie cracking gave you away.

"Sweetheart, you can tell us. the truth," Mountain comforted, rubbing his hand against your arm. You took a deep breath, and told him what he'd said to you, paraphrasing the vile comments to save yourself the humiliation.

"He told me he didn't find me attractive. He... was disgusted by me?"

You felt the way Swiss' hands tightened on the fabric of your couch, his claws threatening to rip the material. Phantom sat upright and twisted to look at you. Rain beside you found your hand and enveloped it in his. Mountain stopped rubbing your arm, still holding you close but staring at you in shock. And Sodo? He took a very slow, deep, controlled breath in and out, shaking his head.

After a moment of silence, Mountain turned his body to face you, adjusting your shoulders so you were looking at him square on. he tucked your hair back behind your ears to get a good look at you, wiped at the tears on your cheeks, and held your chin up to stop your from sinking into yourself again.

"Right there, okay? You keep your chin right there, held fuckin' high. Because he's wrong, you hear me? Wrong. You are beautiful, and you deserve so much better than him."

His sincerity had you tearing up again, but he wiped the tears away for you.

"Oh, he's dead wrong, sugar. Emphasis on 'dead' if I catch him alone..." Swiss growled behind you.

Phantom sat up on his knees, resting his chin on yours. "So pretty," he mumbled shyly.

Rain shuffled up behind you, placing a hand on your shoulder and rubbing soothing circles into it with his thumb. "Please don't listen to a man like that. He wouldn't know beauty if it smacked him in the face."

"Which you should have done," Sodo piped up, smirking.

Their support was unwavering, their kind words unending. Without even discussing it, they took shifts to sit next to you, to hold you, make you laugh or let you cry - whichever you needed. Hours they spent in your quarters; some of the best friends you'd ever made in your life.

Your boys made sure they didn't leave until you believed them, until you saw yourself as they saw you.

Beautiful.

[deeppenguinstudent]

OKAYY so this was supposed to be just a prompt but I got carried away. (Also it's kinda NSFW I'm so so sorry😭😭 I just love them so much)

I like to think that Jean buys a gun after Jeremy leaves. No one knows about it, he gets the gun through some discredited seller. He tells himself it's just a safety precaution, just in case he gets attacked.

He keeps his gun under his pillow, liking the feel of the ridges. He doesn't pull the trigger, he doesn't even take the safety off until one day it gets so bad. He takes out then gun, loads the bullets and presses it against his jaw. He's shaking, he wants to die he always has. Jeremy has left overseas for training, Laila has also left alongside Jeremy but Catalina is making their dinner downstairs.

Catalina is whistling some preppy song as she swivels her hips, excited to speak to Jean about some gossip in her computer science class. He can't leave her alone. He wouldn't let Catalina find her body; he'll die by the countryside with no one to remember his name. He'll just be a rumour within Exy; the famous backliner that killed himself. He wouldn't be as different as the other Ravens who did succeed the previous year.

Jeremy visits, of course he does because that's just how Jeremy is. Unrelenting Jeremy, who can see past Jean's faux mask. He finds the gun. it's the first time he ever sees Jeremy cry. He didn't cry when a Raven punched him in the nose, nor did he cry when bryson came down to the dorms demanding him to emancipate himself or leaving this foolish exy pipe dream.

Jeremy tries not to cry in front of Jean, but he fails this time. His tears shine in the moonlight as Jean tries to reason with him. He tries to reason that he's not going to pull the trigger. Jeremy looks him the eye, his hands ever so cruelly gentle and voice softer than a whisper. He asks silently: "Do you wish to live, Jean?"

Jean's voice catches in his throat. Of course he does. He wants to tell Jeremy how he yearns for their shared nights as he Jeremy enveloped him when he was still captain. He wants to tell him that he's happy at USC, much happier than he ever would be in evermore. He has so much here. Why wouldn't he be?

But then why would he keep a gun tucked away under his pillow, testing its weight? Why would he hover over his wrists with a kitchen knife, flexing his vein from time to time?

He chokes out, "I don't know."

And that was the most truthful lie he would ever tell Jeremy. Jeremy's face would be a nightmare to Jean forevermore. His eyes are filled with more tears, but his smile is so heartbreakingly sad. He is silent as he leans in to kiss Jean, it was lingering and has Jean clutching onto him - hands pulling Jeremy to him as they rest on the neckline of his shirt and Jeremy's fingers never moving from his cheeks.

They kiss and pull back, kiss and pull back. Jeremy looks like he'd be the one with a gun to his temple if they break away, even for a moment. He chases Jean's lips as he pulls back so Jean indulges him. He is always the one to finally close the gap in the end.

Jeremy now is laying on his chest, absentmindedly circling it - he has an animalistic grip on Jean's waist, and Jean's hands knead his hair.

"You shouldn't do this to yourself, Jeremy," Jean's words were barely there, more like he was voicing out his thoughts accidentally.

Jeremy whips his head up and searches for an answer. His tear stains are dried against his cheeks, and his eyes scrutinise him further.

"You can't tell me how to live my life, Jean." Jeremy is now sitting up, his hands shaking as he clutches against Jean's chest, thighs bracketing Jean and lips parted in...anger? Jeremy is never angry. This wasn't right. Jean was already ruining the perfect, kind, sweet Jeremy into something rotten and bitter. It was all he could do - he broke everything he touched.

"Look at you, Jeremy," Jean pushed himself off the bed frame, Jeremy was now on his lap. Jeremy's face didn't look right with a vexed expression. He was normally smooth and patient, but now he was an ugly beast with rage; he was already mirroring Jean's nasty ways.

"You're beautiful, kind, and deserve someone who can give you what you need," Jean licked his lips as Jeremy's gaze grew more heated with fury. "I'm not even classified as damaged goods because I was never worthy enough to be anything more than dirt buried in the ground. A pitiful corspe of who Jean Moreau once was. "

He waited for Jeremy's response, but all he got was his wrists at the side of his head, Jeremy pushing closer towards him - his body heat frustratingly intoxicating.

"Stop talking, Jean. You're completely wrong, once again." Jeremy tried to mask exasperation with a smile, but it turned to more of a grimace.

"I'm not doing this out of pity - or whatever you think. I'm doing this because you put a curse on me ever since you entered USC. A wretched curse that tormented my mind poisoned my thoughts. Even after I left USC, all I could even fathom to think about was you, you, you."

Jeremy took a deep breath before leaning in again, kissing him bruisingly before letting his forehead rest against Jean's.

"I think about how you love to tease your friends with monikers, how you hide your face in abashedness when someone reciprocates. How you complain about the Trojans getting sweet treats after they win a competition yet eyes sparkle with want seeing cupcakes with pink frosting. How you laugh at my stupidest jokes, how you make fun of me when ever I try to cook, how your eyes linger when I wear shorts around the house. How you listen to me rambling about my favourite literature books, how you enjoy to comment such moronic remarks whenever Laila turns on her reality TV shows."

Jeremy kissed his way from Jean's mouth to his ears, biting Jean's earlobe and smiling silently when Jean's fingers scratched lightly at his back.

His voice was dripping with desire, "I can't go back to a life without you Jean. I don't think I'll ever forget today, your lips will be seared indefinitely into the crevasses of my mind. You've ruined me, truly; in the best way possible," Jeremy's voice was mellow and like an aria against Jean's ear, "I need you so badly, a single smile of yours is able to incinerate my heart into flames. I want to see every side of you, ugly and beauteous."

With a open mouthed kiss to the skin below Jean's earlobe, Jean's breath wavered and his heartbeat stuttered, "If you want to die Jean, please call me. Make sure there's two bullets in this gun when you pull the trigger, one for me and one for you."

Jean reeled Jeremy backwards so hard, it almost gave him whiplash, "Jeremy - what are you saying?"

Jeremy gave a lazy smile, his eyes taking in Jean at leisurely pace as he hiked up Jean's shorts higher and higher. Jean let out an inquisitive sound and eyes widened in realisation.

"Are you okay with this?" He paused his ministrations and it was like time stopped. Of course, Jeremy wasn't like those heathens at the Nest yet that singular question broke the last of his composure. Crushing their lips together, he straddled Jeremy on his lap - he gave an appreciative grunt as he felt Jeremy's thighs below him. Jeremy raised an eyebrow whimsically and Jean kissed that expression off his face.

"Show me the root of your desires, Jeremy." Jean puffed his breath against Jeremy's mouth, biting his lower lip down. Jeremy enveloped his waist and pulled him in impossibly closer.

"With pleasure."

[dazed--xx]

⚠️Love Is Gone..⚠️

Summary: I'm sorry, don't leave me, I want you here with me. I know that your love is gone. I can't breathe, I'm so weak, I know this isn't easy. Don't tell me that your love is gone…..That your love is gone

Member: Han Jisung x Reader

T/W: ANGST!!!!!!!!!!!!, hate comments, distant partner, mentions of depression, mentions of anxiety, assault, recording of an assault, hate speech. Cursing, SUICIDAL THOUGHTS AND ACTIONS, Crying, Feeling alone, happy-ish ending, etc

Word Count: 2.5k

A/N: ❗!!!!!THIS STORY IS TRIGGERING. I USED MY ACTUAL HISTORY WITH DEPRESSION FOR THIS ONE SO THERE IS AN ACCURATE DEPICTION OF SUICIDAL THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS. PLEASE READ WITH CAUTION!!!!!!!❗this is the only authors note I'm making on the playlist please read this. I'm adding this story because a break up is not the only form of heartbreak you could experience. I added the mature tag because of the themes in this. This is an important story for me and this song genuinely inspired this story. No matter what member I used for this song this was going to be the story so any members name could have been used for this one. I felt Jisung fit the story so well though I love this quokka and he deserves an impactful first solo story on my master list. I struggled to not cry while writing this so let's see if you can hold back tears while reading it. After every thing they go through they deserve a happy ending I needed to give them one😭😂 but please comment your thoughts. I love your opinions and I respond to almost everyone. Anyway please enjoy the angsty goodness.

Don't go tonight, Stay here one more time.Remind me what it's like, oh…And let's fall in love one more time, I need you now by my side. It tears me up when you turn me down

“Do you have to go?” you question hesitantly, nibbling on your bottom lip as you watch Jisung put his coat on. “Yes, I already told you that, Y/N” He sighs, almost sounding annoyed. You pout, staring at your interlocked hands. “Yeah, you did sorry…” you trail, trying to maintain your composure at your boyfriend's reluctance to be around you “Don't wait up” He calls as he makes his way out of the door. The moment you hear the ‘click’ of the lock you allow the tears you had been holding back to flow down your cheeks.

For weeks now, Jisung had grown distant; during comeback and award season it was unfortunately a normal part of your relationship. But, you had always been able to maintain a conversation with him if something was bothering you. Except for some reason this comeback season, the first since you and Jisung had announced your 1-year relationship, was different. While, both you and Jisung had expected some backlash, things seemed to be easier for Jisung than they had been for you. You have received many snarky and rude comments about how unfit for Jisung you were.

Your hair is too dry and straw-like.

You are too fat.

You are too unimportant.

You wished to tell your boyfriend as soon as these comments flooded your social media. He had warned you to turn your comments off and avoid social media for a while, but you didn't listen figuring you could deal with a couple of mean comments. However, as time went on you wished you had listened as the comments got worse and worse.

Kill yourself slut

Jisung deserves more than some useless bitch as his girlfriend!!!

She's so disgusting clearly she's a gold digger, I wish someone would just get rid of her!

She is such a cunt, I hope she kills herself soon…

You broke down the first time you had read those comments. You couldn't understand what you had done wrong by falling in love. You first tried to bring it up 2 weeks ago. They had finished filming the music video for their latest single. He had come home; energy high, he radiated from the adrenaline. He froze when he saw you seated on the couch tears streaming down your face. You looked at him startled. “ what's wrong?” He questioned as he rushed over to your side taking your face in his hands. “You're home early…” you mutter the only words that could be released from your mouth in your vulnerable state. Little did you know those three words would trigger and argument and the hate comments were left forgotten. After that day you tried to ask him to talk but he would zoom out of the house and that's when the loneliness set in.

You felt pathetic

You dreaded every morning you opened your eyes. Questioning why you were still here. You slowly realized your level of insignificance. Breathing hurt, a physiological natural event felt wrong. While you know the act of breathing didn't hurt physically, it hurt emotionally. Every morning you lay in bed, not bothering to pull yourself out unless you had to go to the bathroom, or to drink water. Sleep didn't stop most days, Jisung spent most of his days working until well after you'd fallen asleep. You rarely saw him, these days.

If you hadn't run out of feminine products you'd have spent another full day in bed, but as those familiar cramps continue to wreak havoc on your uterus you trudge your way to the store. You were grateful for the large hoodie that helped shade your eyes from the blinding sun as you crossed the street. You continue on your way, you pout to yourself as you see the influx of hate comments while you check to see if Jisung had responded to your inquiry of if he needed anything from the store. Nothing… you sigh to yourself as you pass a group of about 5-6 girls as you make your way into the store.

You hear them murmuring to themselves as you make your way down the aisles. You scan the pads when you feel a dainty finger tap your shoulder. Giving the person a side glance you raise an eyebrow. “Hmm?” you hear a petite soft voice call to you “Um excuse me are you Y/N?” she questions in a sickeningly sweet way. You get a sinking feeling in your gut.

Run…Run as fast as and as far as you can

your conscience screams at you but your feet are glued to the floor as you stare at the girl like a deer in headlights. You struggle to find words as a devious grin grows on the girl's face. Two girls begin to come up behind her, you step to turn the other direction only for two more girls to block your escape as they creep towards you. The girl who approached you first now has her phone pointed in your direction as she begins to question you “Why is someone as dirty as you near Jisung oppa?!” She growls as the girls crowd around you. They shout profanity at you as you stare at the ground, murmuring apologies for your relationship not wanting to insult your boyfriend's fans. The last thing you wanted to do was embarrass him further.

“Look at her! She's so pathetic” the ring leader instigated “She's just standing there like an idiot!” she growls before sending her free hand flying across your face. You feel a sharp sting on your cheeks as you attempt to push past two of the girls. They send you flying roughly against the shelves behind you. You whimper in pain mumbling another apology begging them to let you go as they unleash a flurry of hits and kicks on you. They laughed as they told you how pathetic you are. You tried to protect your face by curling up in a ball. You drowned out their insults, holding in your tears and words until they were finished. They walked away in laughter as you groaned in pain rolling on the ground for a moment. You pull yourself off the ground grab your pads and limp your way to the counter. The cashier stares at you with concern in his eyes, “Ma'am do you need me to call the police?” he questions. A sense of pity and worry settles over him as you shake your head “N-No..I don't want this to be a big thing. I'm okay” you state blankly, putting your money on the counter you grab your pads and rush out of the store. You hold onto your ribs as you limp your way into the alley beside the store.

Pressing your back against the wall you wince at the contact you collapse to the ground. You bury your face in your hands. You sob harshly, your body trembling as you allow the tears to stream down your cheeks. You hiccuped as you pulled your phone from your pocket. You dial Jisung’s number, you waited trying to catch your breathe. One, two, three rings “We’re sorry the number you have dialed—” you end the call holding the phone to your chest you allow your sobs to shake your body. Dark thoughts beginning to take over when your flurry of calls go unanswered.

You're so pathetic, Jisung won't even answer your calls. You're worthless, You're nothing, You just want to die. you should die….Life is too hard. It's over what's the point anymore? The entire world hates you…. I give up…

With final resolve, you open your conversation with Jisung and begin typing.

I'm sorry, I wish I could have said goodbye properly. I love you please remember that. I'm sorry I wasn't good enough. I'm sorry I couldn't be what you deserve. I wish things weren't like this. I'm weak. It's all too hard. I can't handle it anymore. It feels like I'm in open ocean and I'm so close to drowning. I'd can't do this anymore. Please don't blame yourself. None of this is your fault I just wasn't strong enough. I'm just pathetic. I hope you can forgive me one day. I'm so sorry. I love you. Goodbye…

You hit send before turning on Do Not Disturb. You slowly limp toward the park. You felt numb as you stared at the ground, you come upon the walking bridge. You stand in the middle of the bridge, you watch the water. You had heard somewhere that the most calm-looking water was the most dangerous. You pull yourself onto the banister. Taking a deep breath you lean forward.

I'm begging please, just stick around; I'm sorry, don't leave me, I want you here with me I know that your love is gone….

The moment Jisung read your message an uneasy feeling settled over him. He didn't even think before he was dashing out of Chan’s studio and the recording they were currently doing. He called you in a panic; his anxiety growing worse and worse at your failure to answer. He felt his throat closing as he ran in a frenzy out of the JYP building ignoring his member's worried calls of his name. Quickly pulling up the Find My Phone app he sees you at the park nearby. He ran faster than he ever has before getting to the park in no time. He looks around for a moment. He spots you standing on the bridge. He clutches his chest relaxing as he sees you standing there, staring at the water below. He breathes a sigh of relief as Chan and Changbin catch up to him he continues to catch his breath as Chan questions him. All three men are caught off guard as you pull yourself up onto the banister. Jisung's eyes widen as he rushes toward you. “Y/N!!” His voice is pained, your head turns to face him. Chan and Changbin running behind their friend worriedly.

“Baby! Please, stop!” Jisung's voice cracks as he reaches the end of the bridge. Your eyes meet his, Only then can he fully see you. Your eyes were bloodshot, tears streaming down your cheeks. Bruises littered your face. Dried blood speckled all over your hoodie. Your appearance sent Jisung into shock he stared at you wide-eyed “I'm sorry…” you whisper to him as you let go. Jisung's world crumbles as you disappear from his sight. He dashes to where he last saw you. “Y/N!!” He cries his voice hoarse as his legs give out from beneath him. Chan wraps his arm around Jisung and guides him to the floor holding him close he allows the younger man to cry to his heart's content as Changbin assists the paramedics in finding you. He never imagined this would happen. You, the only other person besides Felix, that was the definition of sunshine. Jisung felt numb as Chan held onto him as he replayed his last moment with you in his head.

I'm sorry! don't leave me! I want you here with me! I know that your love is gone….I can't breathe! I'm so weak! I know this isn't easy! Don't tell me that your love is gone…

When the video of your assault surfaced the day after your attempt; Jisung felt sick to his stomach. He hates himself for not being there with you. After watching the video over and over, he finally decided to check your phone. When he was able to charge the device Jisung could feel a wave of nausea crash over him as an influx of disgusting hate messages and comments came through. He stared at your unconscious figure, he held your hand tightly as he cried “I'm so sorry baby. I'm sorry… I didn't know. I'm sorry I was too late.” he pressed his forehead to your hand “Please…please wake up. I'll do anything. Please don't let go, I know you feel alone, but you have me. Please don't leave me behind, without you I'm nothing…” his breathing grows heavier, tears cascading down his face. “I love you so much. I need you—I need you, baby, I can't keep doing this. I need you so much right now. Please wake up….Don't let me lose you, not like this. I'll fix everything…I'll show you how much you mean to me, please!” He exclaims he can't handle the expressionless look on your face. He was grateful you were no longer pale though.

It took three more weeks before you opened your eyes. your head pounded as Jisung muttered something under his breath. “W-what?” you choked out, your voice sounding coarse and scratchy. Jisung's eyes widen as he stares at you at the sound of your voice. He collapsed to the floor as tears built in his eyes, he sobbed harshly “T-Thank you! You're awake! You're okay!” his body trembled as he reached for your hand. You stare at him your face void of any emotion as he cried you pulled your hand away from his as if his contact burned you.

You saw his expression fall as he shook his head in denial “N-No..” He states in disbelief as he meets your eyes. “P-Please I—Where were you?…” you cut him off with heartbreak and disappointment in your tone. Jisung whimpers at your question. “I'm sorry, I-I should have—I didn't realize, okay? I'm so sorry, please don't pull away from me..” he stammers his apology causing your heart to clench. “I don’t want to see you right now…” you whisper. You hear the most heartbreaking sob erupts from Jisung’s chest. “No, please! I should have been there for you. I should have done more but I can't lose you When you jumped I felt like my entire world was falling apart. You were so close—I was right there. I should have answered your calls. I should have noticed something was wrong. I'm sorry okay? I'm so sorry. There's nothing I could be more sorry about but please I can't—I can't lose you. I don't want to be without you please let me fix this..” he begs his eyes not leaving yours once.

“Jisung…”

“Please. I'm sorry okay? I'll say it forever if I have to. Please I want you right here, next to me, always. I know it's hard but we love each other. I can make you love me again. Please….please don't hate me. I know I messed up but please don't break me too…I can't handle the thought of losing you let alone it actually happening. Please stay with me?” he pleads his eyes filled with hope as he holds onto your hand. “I'll never let you feel alone again I promise. You'll always have me. I'll give you the world if you ask for it. I'll spend the rest of my life making up for this please let me…” He begs, his voice cracking between sniffles. You stare at him, your heart yearning for him. You feel your resolve crumbling as he continues to cry. You caress his cheek, staring into his eyes. He looks at you hopefully, melting into your touch. “Please just, Don't tell me that your love is gone…i wouldn't be able to handle that.” he whimpers. You give him a sad smile, caressing his cheek. You lean in pressing your lips against his softly.

⏪|⏸️|⏩

Taglist: @yangbbokari @havenwithleeknow

[augustvandyne]

LOVEDDDDD THE BABY FIC 😭👏🏽 def neeeeeed a part 2 😘

-🖇

here it issssss! i feel like its really short but oh well..

baby jack

( months later)

Your eyes burnt, so you can only imagine how bad Angela felt.

The two of you loved that you had a third addition to your family, but you were beginning to think you should’ve just adopted a dog..

Just kidding!

You loved your wife, but she was starting to get on your nerves with the whole birthing mother crap, where she basically has you attend to the baby every time he begins crying because she went through all the pain without you.

Which isn’t totally true.. you were there during the important part. But Angela doesn’t see it that way. She wanted you there for the whole thing, and because you weren’t, she wakes you every time.

But to be fair, you did deserve it, and you loved her, so you’d do anything for her.

Even if it meant be sleep deprived.

And, besides, you love you and Angela’s son whom you’d named after your guys’ late friend Jackson.

You know his death tore Angela apart, and you as well, which is why you named the baby after him.

Angela goes and visits his grave at least twice a week, which you love her for.

Right now you guys have a rare quiet moment, so the two of you are cuddled up on the couch. Angela on top of you, with her head cuddling into your chest.

You get a solid, amazing, two hours of sleep before the baby starts crying from the room.

You groan, and tap Angela to get her to lay up, but she surprises you when she says, “Lay back down, I got him.”

Angela appears a few minutes later, the baby in her arms. You flip on some cartoons for baby Jack and open your arms back up for Angela once she sits the baby on his play mat.

Instead of laying back down with you, she sits up, and ushers you to lay your head in her lap.

She runs her hands through your hair, and it feels so good.

You can’t remember the last time the two of you laid together, just the two of you without interruptions, and it felt amazing.

Well, there was potentially an interruption, but right now he was occupied, so you were okay for now.

“I’m sorry,” Angela watches your sleepy face.

“For what?” You ask groggily.

“For putting all the baby stuff on you,” Angela gives a half smile. “It wasn’t your fault the only lead in weeks happened at the worst time ever.”

“No, but it is my fault that I took the lead. I could have just passed it off to Nyla,” You give a sympathetic look, and Angela can tell you really mean it.

“True, but it still isn’t fair I keep blaming everything on you,” Angela loosely starts braiding your hair. “You broke at least ten laws to get back to me in time.”

You sleepily laugh, “That I did.”

“I’ll swear to secrecy on one condition,” Your wife dips her chin to her chest so she can gain your full attention.

“And what may that be,” You sit up on your elbow, but make sure Angela’s fingers don’t leave your scalp.

“Forgive me,” Angela’s eyes scan yours. “I feel terrible for putting all the work on you. There was no reason for it. There’s no reason for me to blame you for anything at all, really, because you were there for what mattered, and that’s all I care about.”

“I forgive you,” You scan her eyes back, leaning up to give the woman a kiss. “And I love you.”

“Love you, too,” Angela gives you a breathtaking smile.

Jack crawls over towards the two of you, and you lean down to place a kiss on his head, picking him up to sit him in Angela’s lap.

“Hi Baby Jack,” Angela called him by the nickname that everyone had adapted to him the second they all met him.

“How’s your show, huh?” You place your finger in one of his tiny palms, looking at him the same exact way you look at Angela. Like you love him with your whole soul—you’d take a bullet for him or would trade yourself for him in a terrifying situation.

Jack babbles a small response back.

Angela just watches the interaction between the two people she loves most in the world, and it makes her feel bad about blaming you for everything all over again.

You give smooches to your babies cheek, to which Angela protests, “Heyyy, my turn!”

You chuckle in return, leaning up to give her a bunch of kisses on the cheeks and then another kiss on her lips.

Baby Jack claps, and then all three of you laugh together.

[nescaveckwriter]

Saving Grace - Chapter 4 💓😭🩷

A/N: 🐞... While writing this chapter, the emotions were running high extremely high... So fair warning, grab a BOX of tissues 🤭🥺🥺 okay y'all... L💓VE y'all...!

Warnings: *18+ Only* Mentions of a medical condition, and dying ... bit swearing, heartache,🥹❤️

Characters: Dean Winchester, Bobby Singer, Benny Lafitte, Grace Tucker, Kelly Tucker 😍

Words: 1800-ish😊

Cover & Pictures: Pinterest, Canva, Google

Side Note: Songs not my own, also, Please check out my Masterlist for more, epic stories🐞💕

The old man’s voice is gruff as he speaks to Kelly “Listen the whole point of this album, and show is about touring” Kelly looks at him “Bobby it's simple you sign it or you don’t, Dean Winchester needs Grace more than she needs him, and you know that’s the truth”. Bobby couldn’t deny it, the truth in her words, and Kelly drove a hard bargain, so after some small changes, and a promise of a world tour in a year, he signed.

Kelly walked out of that meeting with Bobby feeling satisfied, and saddened, she promised the old man that Grace would do a world wide tour in a year, letting out a humourless chuckle… ‘Grace will be gone by then, she’s only got a few months left, and I just lied to an old man, great job Kelly, you a horrible damn person, she cussed herself. As she left the studio she tried her very best not to break down, hating the fact that Grace is so strong and all she wants to do is break down and cry, life ain’t fair. 

The thought of burying her sister in a few months overwhelmed her and she broke down crying in the middle of the hallway, tears streaming down her face, her body trembling as she keeps replaying the news they got, not so long ago, the doctor’s words tumbling around “Sorry Grace the scan’s” the doctor’s tone turned sympathetic “honey I’m sorry you have less than a year left” she looked at the doctor then at Grace and she just smiled and said “Then I’ll make the best of the few months I have left, thanks Doc” she looked at Grace like she didn’t understand what he said , but she did. And Kelly wanted to do was break down, scream and shout, and curse and yell, at how it can be possible that her lovely, kind hearted sister could be taken away so early from her.

A hand on Kelly’s shoulder snapped her out of her thoughts, the greenest of green eyes met hers, a gruff voice “Hi? You okay?” she immediately knew who it was, not just was she a fan of his music, but her Fiance, is the drummer for him, and Grace raved on about him, of course she wouldn’t admit but she likes him, and not just about his singing voice. Kelly smiled brushed her tears away and said “yeah, fine thanks Dean” 

Smiling “You don’t look fine?” 

She nearly bit his head off “I’m fine dammit, just leave me the hell alone” Dean raised his hands in the air “Hell I’m just trying to be nice for once, and this is the reaction I get” he huffs “And people still wonder why I prefer Jack Daniels?” he just walked off growling something to himself. And Kelly was left standing, feeling ashamed and heartbroken, she couldn’t tell him the reason. Grace made everyone promise that on one should know, she doesn’t want to be treated like some kind of fragile person, but hell she was fragile. She started making her way out of the building to the car, time to act as if everything is just fine, like her sister is going to die.

Dean walked into the studio, huffing, the little muscle in his jaw jumping. He shot Benny a look “What the hell is the matter with your fiance?” Benny was so confused “Excuse me?” Dean growled “I tried comforting the woman and she bit my head off” Benny nearly jumped up from his sitting position “where is she, is she okay?” Dean glared at him “hell if I know!”.Benny didn’t answer, he shot out of there like a man on a mission, leaving Dean there, still kind of ticked off about the whole situation. 

Grace sat there reading, and humming to the songs they’ll be recording together, she made sure to get some rest the night before, drinking lots of water. She heard them stetson boots on the floor, and there he was, plain old jeans, a black t-shirt and white-creamish cowboy hat, and she could’ve sworn her breathing hitched, but hey she has a heart problem, so it ain’t got nothing to do with him right? His voice broke through, bouncing off the wall “Howdy Grace?” she smiled and greeted “Morning, ready to do this?” he gave her a cocky smile “darling I’m born ready”, shaking her head, laughing a little “good thing your humble?” he found his seat next to her, his forest green eyes piercing her “Oh Honey, why should I be humble, people love me” she tossed her strawberry blonde hair over her shoulder “Oh your pretty smug aren’t you?” he laughed “what can I say darling? I am just confident! She shook her head “nope the word your looking for are arrogant!” he mocked offence “ouch, you know how to humble a man don’t ya?” she giggled and it sounded like a choir of joyful angels, “Nah! Just simply keeping you in check”. He smirked “Alright Miss Humble, why don’t we start with this song?” he tapped on the paper and she nodded, “yeah alrighty let’s do this cowboy”.

She started with the few first verses…

I pushed him away

And carefully said

I'm just not that kind of girl

You might think I'm square

'Cause you've been around and you're wise

In the ways of the world

I know that making is taking for granted

It's all easy come, easy go

He pulled me close and whispered

His gruff voice begun…

Now darlin' there's something I want you to know

I still believe in Waltzes

And girls with old fashioned ways

I still believe in love songs

In the good, in the good ole days

I've always liked happy endings

Somebody's dream coming true

I still believe in Waltzes

And dancing the last one with you

She pitched in again…

He slipped into bed, I turned over and said

I'm worried you working so late

Is it just your job that keeps you away, Lord

I know the temptations are gray

I'm just a wife, I'm just a momma

It's not too exciting I know

He pulled me close and whispered those same words

He told me that night long ago

His voice drew …

I still believe in Waltzes

And girls with old fashioned ways

I still believe in love songs

At the end, both of them started to sing in harmony 

In the good, in the good ole days

I've always liked happy endings

Somebody's dream coming true

I still believe in Waltzes

And I'll dance the last one with you

We still believe in Waltzes

When they hit those last notes, they were so in sync, like they’ve been doing it for years, Dean let out an impressed chuckle “damn that was amazing” Grace nodded excitedly, “yes that was perfect, that was amazing, the way you came in on that first verse ‘now darling’ that was mind blowing” while she explained she gestured with her hands, and he couldn’t really make out the rest, of her sentence because he got mesmerised by the way her lips moved as she spoke, watching intently, the way it curved, the way it pursed together with certain words, and then finally as she spoke and her tongue darted out, wetting her lips, to speak further, all he could think is how is it possible for one woman, to do such an innocent act, that was downright turning him on. He had to take a sip of water to cool himself down, and then he heard her sweet voice “You okay Dean?” he just simply nodded and gestured that he was thirsty. She simply smiled and took a few sips of water herself. 

Bobby, who was sitting, listening and watching to them, handed them the next song, and Dean shot him a somewhat uncomfortable glare, but of course the old man didn’t care. After Dean adjusted he started strumming on the guitar, and looked at her, smiling, a smile reaching his eyes. As he sang the first verse he knew never had a song felt so true, because he’d really love to lay her down.

There's a lot of ways of sayin' what I want to say to you

There's songs and poems and promises and dreams that might come true

But I won't talk of starry skies or moonlight on the ground

I'll come right out and tell you I'd just love to lay you down

Lay ya down and softly whisper pretty love words in your ear

Lay ya down and tell you all the things a woman loves to hear

I'll let you know how much it means just havin' you around

Oh darlin', how I'd love to lay you down

A slight pinkish colour crept onto her cheeks as he glanced directly into his eyes, falling in with the next verse…

There's so many ways your sweet love made this house into a home

You've got a way of doin' little things that turn me on

Their voices collided with the next few verses, and they couldn’t keep their eyes off each other, emotions running high, their voices, singing the words their hearts and bodies wanted so badly…

Oh darlin', how I'd love to lay you down

Lay ya down and softly whisper pretty love words in your ear

Lay ya down and tell you all the things my woman loves to hear

I'll let you know how much it means just havin' you around

Oh darlin', how I'd love to lay you down

Lay ya down and softly whisper pretty love words in your ear

Lay ya down and tell you all the things my woman loves to hear

I'll let you know how much it means just havin' you around

Oh darlin', how I'd love to lay you down

The song ends and the air is palpable with so much unspoken desire, and need, to simply taste each other’s lips, the two of them stared at each other, Dean slightly leaning in, merely inches away from finally giving in and tasting her lips, but the moment was ruined by Grace getting up and walking out hastily, mumbling something about she needs fresh air. Dean groaned out of frustration, he could’ve sworn she felt the electricity too, but no, she just left.

Grace hurried outside, trying to catch her breath. Before she knew it, she called Kelly, before Kelly could properly greet her, Grace rambled on “Sis, I’m in big trouble, the man… I nearly kissed, I nearly kissed him, I can’t feel this way… why do I feel this way, I barely know him… I can’t be falling in love with him.. Can I ..?” Kelly’s heart broke, she knew what her sister meant, “Gracie, sweetie… I don't know what to say!” Grace’s voice came out sounding slightly brittle, “This can't be happening… why? I can’t be falling in love now” Not now! Why did he have to be him” she grunted. 

Kelly tried to calm her down, knowing she shouldn’t exert herself, “please calm down, please”. Grace broke down for the first time since she got the news “K…Kelly, I can’t fall in love with Dean, I am going die in a couple of months, and I can’t imagine a future, because there is now future, there is now, rainbows, and roses, candle light dinners, whispering loving words to each other, there is nothing, that’s certain” barely audible through the crying “the only thing that my future holds, is my heart stopping in a few months, or weeks or days…” all you could hear on both ends off the phone calls, is heart shattering sobbing. 

@jackles010378 @winchesterwild78 @k-slla @angelbabyyy99

[articularreview]

⚠️Spoilers for Shinrei tantei Yakumo - the lamenting doll file 03 and the epilogue⚠️

Here in case you missed it

I just read it and spontaneously wrote this.

Be careful if you haven't read it yet.

The file starts with where it left off the last time with them deciding to locate Mahiro's mother.

I kinda forgot about it since we haven't seen Isshin for a while, but this volume reminded me of how much Yakumo is influenced by Isshin. Be it the way they talk or sometimes even their mannerisms.

It's pretty much a given that they'll have to stay another night at the hotel but that would mean Haruka will have to stay in that creepy ass room again. Isshin really told Yakumo “accept the situation or sleep with her”😭😭😭

But sadly It's just like Gotou said, Their relationship label won't allow it smh

Gotou's snores and Isshin's bad posture are KILLING ME. My mom entered the room while I was having a fit of laughter I just looked crazy to her 😭

Isshin is so chill he doesn't care if you try to make him look bad. Rather his hilarious responses made Gotou look silly for complaining. Poor Gotou-san. Maybe I should learn from him... Unbotherement sure is powerful~

Anyways I guess that means Yakumo is the only one who sleeps normally hahaha

Just like I expected, Mahiro's death is weighing Hiromi down. kinda knew it from file 02, but hearing the details from Masae made me want to cry. No parent should ever go through this.

And so they split into two teams: team Gotou and Yakumo. and team Haruka and Isshin. All I'll say is that the latter team sure is a good match.

And then we have Gotou-san who not only has to put up with Yakumo's comments but also got a Salary cut too!! He suffered too much this trip. Imagine wanting to skip work only to get dragged all the way to a whole different prefecture. Still kinda his fault for ignoring Ishii smh.

Speaking of Ishii I'm happy he and Makoto were mentioned even though they didn't make an appearance. Isshin's mere presence made up for any other character's disappearance. Kaminaga-sensei is a genius for mentioning Eishin too. I think references like that will increase in the complete version. Knowing the future and the direction of your work sure makes a big difference. It was really interesting knowing that Eishin was the one taking care of Nao when Isshin's not around. Nao must really miss Isshin even if she doesn't show it on her face. I head canon afterwards Nao being overjoyed to see not only Isshin but Yakumo and Haruka too after his two-day disappearance.

The scene when that madman dragged Haruka gave me the chills. Kaminaga-sensei using TTCM as a reference sure was brutal I ended up imagining it. Haruka did her best till the very end but the situation was hopeless. She can't even resist. her mouth, legs and wrists were taped. And on top of that he had the audacity to slap her! How dare him! If that man wasn't charged with attempted murder after all this I'm throwing hands!

In the end the case was solved and we find out that Takahiro-kun was the one talking to Hiromi all along. It really broke my heart knowing that all this time he didn't even know he was dead and yet played along to try to comfort Hiromi who was mourning for her child. What a strong kid. He and Mahiro are.

The lamenting doll huh... makes sense.

In the epilogue we learn that Yakumo can't handle hot food which I thought was really cute.

Tbh his whole food preference was quite unexpected. First we learn that he has a sweet tooth (Which Haruka thought doesn't suit him at all lol) and then a similar situation to the one in the epilogue happened in vol. 7 iirc when Yakumo was (again) staring at the sake and when Haruka asked if he can't drink he stubbornally tries to only to spit it out. This man just can't be honest😂 I actually really respect men who don't drink or smoke so that's a flex~

Now some of my favorite Yakumo lines which for some reason all happen to be verbally abusing Gotou (Can't blame Haruka for laughing because c'mon how could you not?)

• “You can say that because you've never heard it yourself. Compared to Gotou-san's snores, even a train would be quieter.”

• “A member of the police stating that he'll be driving under the influence? Japan is finished.”

• “I'm saying bears can't understand the taste of wine. What if someone made up a new proverb: bears and wine.”

• "I don't want to waste any more calories than this."

• "Well, that's not surprising. A bear with damaged taste buds such as Gotou-san will never understand."

Bye I'm using these irl.

I'll also add these two because I keep remembering these two exchanges and laughing:

1)

"I see. If you don't want to, it's fine. But please stop bringing cases to me from now on."

"This and that are a different story."

"No, it's the same thing. Ah, that's right. So that Gotou-san will stop bringing me cases, I'll be reporting to the police that you've been leaking investigation details to a civilian."

"What!? Don't joke with me! I'll get fired if you do that!" Gotou shouted in panic.

"Good then. That way I won't have to involve myself in cases that have nothing to do with me, and taxpayer money won't have to go into paying the incompetent Gotou-san; just like killing two birds with one stone."

"What did you say!?"

"Isn't that great? This way, Gotou-san can also play around to your heart's content. So it'll be more like killing three birds with one stone," said Yakumo, grinning as he looked at Gotou.

He really stabbed where it hurt. Having been commented like that, Gotou wouldn't have a way to refuse. "Fine. I'll help. Happy?"

Gotou lifted his heavy bottom up from the sofa reluctantly as he sighed. Yet Yakumo wasn't done with his counterattacks.

"Not really, it's fine even without Gotou-san helping."

"That wasn't what you said earlier!"

2)

"Sorry about that. Could you please tell me what I should do?" Gotou asked formally while swallowing his displeasure.

"You should know if you listened to the story"

"I'm asking because I don't know."

"You should have if you paid close attention to the whole story."

"Well I don't know!"

"Is that something to be proud about? Good grief.”

Too much Yakumo😂

Volume 11 is up next. I'm really really excited for this one because Unkai and Miyuki are one of the best antagonists I've ever read. I'll never forgive them for what they did to Yakumo but their back stories are very very well written and explains how they ended up that way. That last arc will wrap everything up. I remember reading the book description a while back but Laute's translations stopped at the time so I thought I'll never read it.

The day has finally come!!!

[mokokone]

Hi! 👋

Can I request a Kusuriuri (2007) x fem reader, where it's full on angst plus no happy ending. Maybe where the reader and Kusuriuri broke up or something on a bad note, and she turned into a mononoke. In the end, when she still hates Kusuriuri, maybe like 'I hope I'll never meet you in my next lifetime' (your choices on the last words!!)

I want to bawl my eyes out from crying.

Love your work💗, you don't have to do this request if you don't want to. TY :D

A/n: Ayo, why did you have to go and ask me to write this😭💙⁉ I had to listen to some phonk just to power through it. You asked for it, so here it is.

Seriously through, this was fun to write, despite It being sad. Hope you enjoy♡

⚠Trigger Warning!⚠ for graphic depictions of suicide.

Eternal Sorrow - Kusuriuri x Reader Oneshot (Angst)

The rain poured down relentlessly, casting a somber mood over the Shinto shrine. You stood there, your (e/c) eyes red from endless tears, your heart shattered into a million pieces. Your once vibrant and lively persona had been reduced to a shell of your former self, all because of one man – the enigmatic Medicine Seller.

Or Kusuriuri as you used to affectionately call him.

Your relationship had been a whirlwind of passion and intensity, with moments of pure bliss and unbridled joy. From the first spark of attraction to the deep bond you had formed, everything seemed perfect. But as time went on, differences emerged and challenges arose that tested the strength of your love. Miscommunications turned into arguments, and trust slowly eroded away and the once bright future you had envisioned together began to dim.

"I can't do this anymore," you had said, your voice quivering with emotion. "I can't be with you, not when you're so distant and unattainable. I need someone who can love me, who can be there for me, and you... you're just not that person."

And then, in a sudden and heartbreaking turn of events, it all came crashing down in a devastating finale that left you feeling hollow and alone.

Kusuriuri had stood there, his face betraying no emotion, his cerulean eyes as cold as the rain that fell around your. "If that's how you feel, then so be it," he had replied, his words like a knife to your already bleeding heart.

Now, as you stood alone in the shrine, you knew that there was only one way to end the anguish that consumed you. You had lost everything – your love, your happiness, and most importantly... your very reason for living.

Kusuriuri had been that very reason.

He had been your truth ever since you agreed to accompany him on his travels across Edo, help him fight against the Mononoke, and eventually, vowed to be by his side forever.

With a heavy heart, you made your way to the shrine's inner sanctum, where you would perform Seppuku, a form of ritual suicide. The air was thick with the weight of the moment as you knelt before the altar, the sliver blade of the wakizashi glistening in the dim light. With a deep breath, you closed your eyes and whispered one final prayer, feeling the gravity of your decision weighing heavily on your soul as you raised the sword above your head.

Your last thought had been of him - Kusuriuri as your grip on the blade tightened. Tears of sorrow, angst, and hatred streamed down your face as memories flooded your mind.

You remembered the days spent together, the laughter, the love, and the pain. The betrayal that had led you to this moment now seemed like a cruel twist of fate, and as you prepared to take your own life. The sound of your own heartbeat echoed in the silence of the shrine, a steady rhythm that seemed to guide you towards the inevitable.

With a steady hand, you raised the blade and made a swift, decisive cut, feeling the sharp pain as darkness engulfed you.

The warmth of blood trickling down your abdomen brought a strange sense of peace as you slumped forward, the world fading in and out of focus. In your final moments, you could almost hear the whispers of ancestors surrounding you, guiding you towards the next life.

"I hope I'll never meet you in my next lifetime, Kusuriuri. I don't think I could bear the pain of your rejection again."

In that moment, your spirit was transformed, becoming a Yūrei.

After your death, Kusuriuri had been nonchalant, but deep down, he was racked with guilt and remorse. He had loved you more than he had ever loved anyone, but his own emotional distance and inability to truly open up had been his undoing.

Days later, as he stood before your marked grave, Kusuriuri could no longer hold back his emotions. Tears streamed down his face as he knelt before the headstone, his hand trembling as he reached out to trace the engraved letters of your name.

"I'm so sorry, (Y/n)," he whispered, his voice barely audible over the sound of the wind. "I never meant to break your heart. I never meant to cause you so much pain. If only I had been a better friend, a better lover, maybe you would still be here with me."

Suddenly, the air around him seemed to shift, and Kusuriuri felt the presence of a powerful, restless mononoke. He knew it was you, still tethered to this world by the intensity of your hatred and anguish.

He already knew your shape... your reason... and your truth!

With a heavy heart, he unsheathed his sword, transforming into his other half, Hyper! He could feel the weight of your spirit pressing down upon him, your rage and sorrow palpable in the air.

"I'm sorry," he muttered. "I'm so sorry for everything."

And with a swift, precise movement, the he thrusts his sword and exercised your restless spirit, finally freeing you from the torment that had consumed you.

As the cherry blossoms continued to fall, the Medicine Seller stood there, his eyes fixed on the grave before him. He knew that he would never be able to atone for the pain he had caused you, and that your memory would haunt him for the rest of his days.

But in that moment, as he felt the weight of your spirit lift, he knew that he had done the only thing he could – he had given you the peace you had so desperately sought. And as he turned to leave, Kusuriuri allowed himself to weep, his tears mingling with the cherry blossom petals that fell from the trees.

[ohmyeyesmyeyes]

a white man? TYPICAL!

charles leclerc x f!reader

fc: simone ashley

warnings: swearing

< n/a: i found myself making charles lactose intolerant for some reason, and idk why but it kind of makes sense >

liked by landonorris, livkatecooke and 419,183 others

ynofficial: so he calls me up and he's like 'je t'aime, je t'aime toujours'

view all comments

fan1: WHAT?

fan2: IS THIS WHO I THINK IT IS?????

fan3: manifesting it's charles

fan4: that's definitely monaco

fan5: CAN SOMEONE CONFIRM IF THE THIRD PICTURE IS WHAT CHARLES DOES AFTER FERRARI SCREWS UP????

carlossainz55: yes but only after he's had a hot chocolate and calmed down

landonorris: we call this stage 'total and complete surrender of hope'

fan6: tell me you're kidding

danielricciardo: they're not

fan7: it sounds like the name of a painting you'd find in a prestigious museum and it'd just be the portrait of a man that completely encapsulated heartbreak and every possibly morsel of pain that may ever be experienced by a man

liked by ynofficial

fan8: charles better be able to fight fr if he breaks my girls heart again smh

fan9: i feel like i'm the only one who is on the 'they never broke up' agenda

fan10: nah i am too

fan11: the taylor reference once more i am sobbing

fan12: why does charles own a pair of real madrid shorts

carlossainz55: they're mine from when he shat himself after eating too much ice cream

charles_leclerc: that is just not true at all

landonorris: there's no shame in being lactose intolerant 🤨

charles_leclerc:  😑 

liked by jamesharveyblair, alex_albon and 391,993 others

charles_leclerc: congratulations to the happy couple! the wedding was beautiful, thank you for having us ❤️

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fan13: which happy couple? 🤔

carlossainz55: 🤷

fan14: SHE LOOKS STUNNING I WANT TO CRY

fan15: the green??? immaculate, babe

fan16: i'm jealous of charles

fan17: charles.jpg?

charles_leclerc: 🫢

landonorris: why wasn't i invited to the wedding i don't understand

charles_leclerc: because you don't know them???? idfk

landonorris: but carlos was there 😞

charles_leclerc: because he knows them?????

carlossainz55: it was a ferrari wedding, no hard feelings

landonorris: 💔

carlossainz55: have some of my love 🧡

landonorris: thank u ❤️‍🩹😳

liked by james_marsden, lissiemackintosh and 611,002 others

ynofficial: wedding shenanigans 💒💃

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fan18: wtf is carlos doing?

ynofficial: shithousery

carlossainz55: she dared me to do it, it's not my fault

charles_leclerc: she didn't dare you to breathe fire and fall into the river and almost drown until i had to drag you out though 🤨

landonorris: HE DID WHAT LMAO

fan19: the candid of charles is just *chef's kiss*

fan20: the boyfriend content we need

fan21: i'm out here admiring the dress and veil 😭😭 they're so pretty

liked by ynofficial

fan22: who was the plus one?

ynofficial: carlossainz55 was

carlossainz55: no no no 🖐️ that is just not true. ynofficial was the plus one

ynofficial: ☹️

fan23: WRONG ynofficial was actually the one invited and she had charles and carlos as her plus 2

ynofficial: i love u

charles_leclerc: fan23 that could never be true unfortunately

danielricciardo: petition for ynofficial to start a .jpg instead of charles📝

landonorris: 📝

lilymhe: 📝

clementnovalak: 📝

lewishamilton: 📝

mickschumacher: 📝

arthur_leclerc: 📝

carlossainz55: 📝

charles_leclerc: 😐

fan24: i'm confused is y/n dating charles again? or are they just friends?

liked by fabioquartararo20 and others

user: y/n l/n at the monaco gp this weekend looking as BEAUTIFUL AS EVER

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fan25: omg is this confirmation that she's back together with charles???????????

fan26: actually she was with red bull today...

fan27: 😲

fan28: what 😲

fan29: 😲

charles_leclerc: 😲😲😲

fan30: charles?

pierregasly: 😂😂

liked by odegaard.98, patriciooward and 649,090 others

ynofficial: lovely weekend on behalf of red bull, maxverstappen1 is smaller than i remember...🤫

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maverstappen1: that's because you were wearing heels 😐

ynofficial: i was also leaning 🤨

maxverstappen1: no

ynofficial: yes

maxverstappen1: NO

ynofficial: it's ok, at least you're taller than mcdreamy 🥰

fan30: max taking a hit to the ego

fan31: OOF

fan32: ok but i missed their banter on sm let's be honest

fan33: i'm crying i hope this means her and charles are back together

charles_leclerc: 😭😭😭😭😭😭

maxverstappen1: yeah keep crying

charles_leclerc: i'm not crying about THAT

charles_leclerc: SHE FUCKING CROPPED ME OUT OF THE LAST PHOTO

ynofficial: oops

landonorris: SHE DID LMAO

carlossainz55: CHRISTMAS HAS COME EARLY SOMEONE CROPPED CHARLES OUT OF A PHOTO BHAHAHAHA

arthur_leclerc: charles_leclerc can you comment on this incident?????

ynofficial: boy if you don't take this opportunity to do the funniest thing ever

maxverstappen1: ^^

charles_leclerc: 😐

charles_leclerc: nothing just an inchident 😐😐😐😐

danielricciardo: *deep inhale* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

maxverstappen1: i can smell your breath from across the paddock

danielricciardo: 😟😟

ynofficial: maxverstappen1 apologise to danny immediately, he's not smiling anymore

charles_leclerc: where's danny

maxverstappen1: charles_leclerc he's in red bull hospitality, and danielricciardo i'm sorry i didn't mean it

danielricciardo: it's okay

charles_leclerc: and where is ynofficial

maxverstappen1: with danny obviously

charles_leclerc: thank youuuu

ynofficial: charles_leclerc i know what you're doing and christian won't let you in the hospitality

charles_leclerc: he won't? 😊

ynofficial: stop scheming

charles_leclerc: but i'm just too adorable to say no to sometimes

ynofficial: i hate you

charles_leclerc: 😘😘

fan34: can we talk about how she's literally glowing in these pictures 😫

fan35: charles bagged a goddess

charles_leclerc: yes i did 🥵🥵

fan36: UMMMM DOES THIS MEAN WHAT I THINK IT DOES

ynofficial posted something on their story...

charles_leclerc posted something on their story...

liked by ynofficial, emmaradacanu and 559,152 others

charles_leclerc: asked this one to marry me a while back. she said no. then laughed in my face and changed her mind.

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ynofficial: i have no regrets

ynofficial: apart from when you nearly started crying, i have regrets from that

maxverstappen1: WAIT THAT'S ACTUALLY REALLY CUTE THAT HE CRIED WHEN YOU SAID NO

maxverstappen1: but now it's my turn to make you apologise to charles bc that was mean

ynofficial: dw i did

charles_leclerc: she did 😏

pierregasly: ew

landonorris: you know it's bad when pierre says it's gross 🤢

fan37: SO YOU'RE ENGAGED?????? WTF??????

fan38: we love to see a desi girl being loved on publicly 😭

charles_leclerc: i can safely promise you that it's not gonna stop anytime soon either 💗

liked by alessiarusso99, oscarpiastri and 689,016 others

ynofficial: as winston schmidt once said: 'a white man? TYPICAL!' but isn't he just so cute? 🥰😘

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fan39: girl you got the cutest white man on earth

liked by ynofficial

charles_leclerc: i'm so excited to marry you it's actually unbelievable

ynofficial: stop it. rn. you're making me blush.

charles_leclerc: NO.

ynofficial: can't wait to marry you either

fan40: i'm gonna tell my kids about these two

landonorris: couple goals? methinks ✅

iammaxgreenfield: i'm honoured to be included in this lovely, loving post 🫶

ynofficial: i'm way more excited about this actually

carlossainz55: 🤨

fan41: who's the best man and maid of honour?

charles_leclerc: maxverstappen1 best man

ynofficial: danielricciardo man of honour

fan42: crying bc maxiel will be walking down the aisle together

liked by danielricciardo and maxverstappen1

BONUS:

[stinky-ahh-gay]

I FINISHED ATLA! WAR IS OVER (litterally)

Alr so:

-My hatred towards Meiko relationship got bigger somehow, and yes Zukka is starting to sound good (why always the red and blue ships, oh god) but Sukka is also good- so i guess Sokka will have to carry the weight of having two beautiful and brave partners

-WHY ISN'T ANYONE TALKING ABOUT THAT EPISODE WHEN UNLE IROH GETS FUCKING RIPPED, BROOOOOOOOOO.

-I've waited 3 FUCKING SEASONS AND GOT THAT KATAANG KISS THAT WAS WANTED BY BOTH, LESGOOOO

-This is the only series in which i actively shipped "straight" ships (we all know Sukki and Kataang were made for the queers)

-Bro Azula needs so much therapy... i hope the prison gives psychological support now that Zuko rules. Bc that girl broke down crying when she got defeated, did not even yell nor get angry like her father, she just broke down (i'm a sucker for sad villains that actually have some kind of reason to be that way)

-Zuko redemption arc? Nah man, in this house we look at the Sokka arc with Momo. Mf started off with wanting to eat him and ended up willing to go inside Appa's mouth to get that little fella back BROOO 😭😭

Before going to The Legends Of Korra, i will read the comics, bc...

-THE FUCKING CLIFFHANGER WITH ZUKO'S MOM, WTF WTF WTF

LIKE- NAH BRUH, I NEED TO KNOW

For today is all, i WILL start to make fanart now 🙏 new obsession has taken my body and is living with the others.

[starheirxero]

See, I genuinely thought, Solar's death broke me-

NOPE, IT WAS EARTH AND LUNAR'S REACTION, BECAUSE BY GOD, THIS AMOUNT OF EMOTIONS SHOULD BE CONSIDERED ILLEGAL- MY POOR HEART-

Earth's everything broke me! Kat did such an outstanding job!! Earth finally cracked under the pressure… She's been trying so hard to keep it all in, to solve it herself quietly, and now her entire world is shattered, because her best friend is dead, and she may never see him again! This was a full on mental breakdown, and I swear, I was crying till my hands were shaking- The way her voice cracked, and got louder and louder, yet she still felt the need to apologize for not holding it together, as if she wasn't in the right to mourn, to grieve, as if she didn't just lose her brother. Because that's what he always was, even, if he didn't see himself that way! He was their big brother, and their anchor! He just never took the title, because he was afraid to intrude, to hope too much, because he didn't see himself as worth it! Not to forget her fear, that if he were to come back, he might end up like Moon, without memory…

Before that, I almost broke when Lunar fell to their knees- They can't even process it! Both of their siblings were crying, but even when their voice broke, they didn't. Instead, they've been pushed back into the numbness they came back in, trying their best to help out, but not being sure how- Their robotic brain is trying so hard to keep them stable, turning off their feelings by doing so, because the moment they come back, all hell will break loose-

Monty's scene also broke me for some reason- Their immediate reaction to seeing Earth cry, and trying to calm her down- I loved his insistence when it came to Lunar as well, because she likely knows what's going on in their head! They heared them say "I'm okay", and instantly replied with "nope, you are coming with us!"

God, even Sun and Moon… Sun sounds so tired, there's so much grieve in his voice! He's trying so hard to be of help, but he can't, not as long as the wounds are fresh... And Moon, Oh dear- The fact, that he barely even reacted to Eclipse! He sounded so damn exhausted, and so done, telling Eclipse that he can't stop him… Before also admitting, that he saw Solar as a brother, but never said anything for Solar's comfort!

Solar truly thought he was replaceable, thought he wasn't worth what he was worth. Yet so many people cared for him, loved him, and are trying so hard to hold out to hope to get him back! If only he could see it…

-Stardust

RIGHTTTTT??!?!?!!!!??!!!!!???????? HEAD IN HANDS EARTH'S GRIEF ACTUALLY MADE MY CHEST TIGHT I WAS SO FUCKED UP ABOUT IT. THIS IS HER FIRST PROPER LOSS. SHE HAD PLANS WITH HIM. SHE'D JUST BEEN TALKING TO HIM. HE WAS JUST THERE FOR HER!!!! 😭😭😭

AND GHOD YEA. SUN HAVING TROUBLE EVEN SAYING IT AND LUNAR SHUTTING DOWN AND MONTY DOING HIS BEST TO HELP EM AND MOON JUST BEING SO WHOLLY DRAINED. Everyone is going through it and its KILLING MEEEE 😭

AND WITH HOW SOLAR THOUGHT OF HIMSELF IN THE FAMILY DON'T EVEN WITH ME I WILL START BAWLING I'M SO FUCKED UP THAT HE NEVER GOT TO KNOW THE FULL EXTENT OF HOW MUCH HE WAS LOVED. STARTS PUNCHING AIR

[heavenlyraindrops]

Rain’s love rant

alright, here goes.

I’m cooked. I’m completely and utterly cooked. I feel like I need to share all this cause each detail is something I need to talk about and it’s driving me insane.

Last year of school I met this girl, let’s call her Crystal, through mutual friends. Basically what happened was I annoyed the shit out of her and was so utterly obnoxious, she thought I was a bitch- but for some reason eventually she ended up finding me endearing and we became really close friends.

we talked all the time. We shared everything. We’d walk away from our group at the table during lunch and wander around the campus together. We both liked other people at the time, she liked a girl that I was on kind of bad terms with- and it pissed me to no end because this girl sort of mistreated me, and her friends alienated me from the school community (it was pretty tight-knit) because I was “weird” (I’m autistic) and I vented about this to crystal, MULTIPLE times but Crystal straight up just ignored it. But to be honest, those girls and Sea are genuinely nice when they can be and although it sounds bad (I cried for nights in a row) I think it couldn’t really be helped and there isn’t much resentment anymore, although we’d still never be friends.

Crystal’s affection for Sea fizzled out, and I got the sense that she liked someone else cause there was a strange period of our friendship like this- turned out that person was me. (More on that later.)

She ended up liking another girl- let’s call her Petal. Petal’s a total bitch. Like she just straight up is. There’s nothing to it other than that.

I started liking Crystal after she liked Petal, although I didn’t realize how much I liked her until, well, uh. Yesterday. She and Petal got together, and I was like “omg! So cute!” But I was low-key jealous and didn’t even realize it, and then Petal tried to drag her away and made her join Petal’s friend group, which were the girls in my primary, Sea and all them. I was insanely angry, jealous, sad, everything. She kept talking about Petal, calling Petal the love of her life, and it broke my heart because id always tried to be there for Crystal, advice, venting, comforting, everything. And now she was leaving me and all my friends for Petal, who, as far as I knew, was uhhhhhh let me think- oh! Pretty.

Shit went down, another bitch (Quartz) in my friend group pulled some shit (whole other story) and said me and my friends were talking shit about Crystal, Petal and Sea when we weren’t- it was all Quartz. Me and Crystal had a huge argument over text and I tried to make her see the truth and she said “I don’t know who the fuck is lying” and then “I have the whole weekend to decide.” (She also told me during this argument that she used to like me and when I asked her why she said I was funny, pretty, smart, good at drawing. First time someone’s been clear about what they like about me, something that shows they actually do, and I started crying.)

whole weekend? Fuck, we didn’t speak for the next few MONTHS after that. It was clear she had chosen Quartz and Petal. I literally cried for nights in a row (again). My fucking principal saw me crying outside the school on School Movie Night. And the whole time I was hoping she’d come back. Eventually I realized that she missed me too.

anyway, fast forward to this week, Monday, bank holiday. I turn on my phone and there’s a huge paragraph from Crystal after months of nothing. Her saying that she’s sorry her gf got in the way of our friendship, that she really wanted to be on good terms with me again, that she missed me. So we did.

we both admitted our mistakes and we both felt really bad that we ended up on bad terms for a while and admitted we missed each other, and honestly I was so happy. I think she was too cause she started crying 😭

the next day we saw each other in school, we hugged, made it up, walked around and talked like we used to. Hugging her felt so good. Sometimes she’s walking around with her friends, with Petal clinging to her arm like she always is, then we both share a look and we both smile at each other it was amazing. I cut my hair off this week too and when Sea and her friends came over to talk to Quartz (who hates Sea and Petal btw) Crystal was standing behind them next to Petal and she didn’t look at Petal, she looked at ME, pointed at her head, mouthed “haircut” or smth idk and smiled and I nodded really giddily and oh god. Then Petal just stared at us both.

Our school had our sports day yesterday, she texted me like “I was gonna come over and talk to you but I couldn’t” and it made me happy but broke my heart at the same time.

I talked about it with my friends and they said it was kind of obvious, how jealous and angry I’d gotten when she’d left our group. They said it wasn’t my fault I liked Crystal.

I could go on and on forever about her. She’s so fucking beautiful- I think I’m genuinely in love which is insane for someone my age but I truly like her, I’ve liked her for so so long without realizing it and now I’ve lost her to Petal and I wanna cry. I like everything about her, even her flaws, the good and the bad, and yes I do want her to be happy but can’t she be happy with me?

I feel really guilty too, especially when I look at her and Petal and realize how happy they are together. I wish I was like Petal honestly, Petal is so pretty and cute and just straight up adorable. And I know I shouldn’t be coveting thy neighbours wife, but I can’t help it. But it’s ok if I liked her before she got with Petal right? 😭😭

I hate this.

ok vent over bye besties

[teawithnosugar]

hi! pls will you write some angst for Ellie Williams x reader where Ellie finds out r knew about the hospital Joel situation!

Truth

Bff!Ellie x Reader

CW: angst/no comfort WORDS: 0.6k SYNOPSIS: You betray your best friend's trust SONG: Fear - Current Joys

"I don't want you to leave"

AN: I swear to god this is so short and rushed but I’m so tired and have more stuff to write 😭 don’t worry, I already have SO MANY ideas for a part 2

Ellie had been silent since she and Joel came back from Salt Lake City. It was unlike her, usually flowing with words, seeking excuses to catch a glimpse of your face or savor your laughter. But now she avoided you like a forbidden current.

Deep within, you sensed the reason, though denial stood firm. Maybe she was tired? Maybe she wasn’t feeling well? But all those feeble excuses faded from your mind once you caught Joel's sympathetic gaze from afar. Ellie was next to you on Shimmer while you were on your own horse, Nelly. It was the first time you’ve seen her in weeks, her presence fleeting—merely for the purpose of patrolling.

Your gaze fixed ahead, towards the slowly unfolding gate. Unease filled your being, keeping you still, your mind an empty canvas. It was only when Ellie clicked her tongue and Shimmer surged forth that you jolted back to reality, urging Nelly forward with a flick of the reins, trailing behind Ellie's lead.

Silence prevailed, your words reserved solely for deciding the path ahead. Never before had guilt whispered within you during those three years of settling in Jackson with Joel and Ellie. You convinced yourself that concealing the truth was for her own sake, that ignorance was her haven, enough to repel any twinge of remorse. But now that you saw how tired she was, and how quiet she was, the guilt came crashing down on you like heavy rain.

You soon found yourself with Ellie in the abandoned pharmacy, mindlessly putting loot into your duffel bag. You were thinking of a way to fix this, to get her to talk to you, to hear her laugh again. ‘You heard Dina and Jesse broke up again?’ ‘I helped the Tipsy Bison add some items to the menu’ ‘I had to tell that kid Gabe that I’m gay cause he confessed he liked me and I had to comfort him for a good 30 minutes cause he kept fucking cryi-’

Your thoughts were interrupted by your own yelp, an obnoxious clicking resonating in the air, and the forceful sensation of being toppled to the floor. You fought against the assault, realizing a clicker had found its way inside and attacked you. You tried to push it off you but it was strong. Ellie rushed to your aid, thrusting her knife into the infected's skull. You gasped as the blade's tip protruded through its furrowed brow before being withdrawn. You heaved heavily, panic slowly waning as you pushed away the limp body.

As calm settled within you, your gaze shifted to Ellie, standing tall above you, her brows knitted together in anger. “What the fuck? Pay attention to your goddamn surroundings,” she scolded. Her angry expression caused you to remember everything, and all of a sudden, tears welled up in your eyes and you let out a shaky “I’m sorry.”

Her gaze narrowed, a scoff escaping her lips. “Jesus it’s fine, no need to cry.” You shook your head frantically, getting up and grabbing her hand as she started to walk away. She looked at you, expression still hardened but a little confused.

“N-no, I’m…I’m sorry…I’m so sorry,” I said shakily, not talking about the clicker anymore, and from my tone, she immediately understood. She stayed silent, wrenching her arm from your grasp, grabbing the bag of loot from the floor and walking out the building and climbing Shimmer.

She gave you one last cold look, green eyes saying everything before she clicked her tongue and pulled the reins. She left you there to get back on your own.

That was the last time you two ever spoke about it.