#don’t mind me i just am really genuinely enjoying my new job

[threnodians]

just me rambling about my job (affectionate):

the job can be rather stressful but the pros FAR, FAR outweigh the cons; legitimately every single person that i work with/for (and yes, i am including the ceo whom i have actually met) is either on the spectrum (both lgbtqia+ and/or autism) and/or some form of mentally ill and/or some form of chronically ill and/or some form of “weeb” or “gamer” and i just... like no it isn’t perfect and it’s really stressful right now because i’m new and there’s shittons of policies and procedures to memorize and the overall job duties to learn but the incentives and overall EVERYTHING make me feel like bawling my eyes out y’all screw veterinary medicine this is my career (at this specific company which shall not be named) for the rest of my life

[alolan-weavile]

oooooh i am deeply unhappy actually

[artydonsgf]

What do you think the challengers trio would be into if they weren’t into tennis? Like their ambitions/goals and stuff.

Idk why but I see Tashi as interested in going into something law medicine because of the human connections present in the field but also the ambition needed to become a doctor is something she could have. Just what i think. I couldn’t think of anything for patrick or art, bur would love to see your thoughts on all three.

ouuu i love this, thank you sm for the request anon! enjoy my thoughts on careers for art, tashi, and patrick that aren’t tennis!

Art Donaldson

- art likes the fast paced nature of tennis but he also likes to slow down

- for that reason, i’m gonna say he’d go into something sciencey

- i think art would excel in school and would be able to go to any school and get any degree, he just chose tennis as his focus

- without it, he goes into chemistry and becomes a very good chemical engineer

- he loves it because on some days he can work in his office and be home in time for dinner and tucking the kids in bed

- other days, he gets to go to the lab/do field work and do something really exciting and cool

- it keeps him away from home for a week at a time but when that week is over, he has a bunch of exciting stories to tell

- loves the work life balance it brings him

Tashi Duncan

- tashi would 100% go into sports medicine.

- i think if she couldn’t go pro, she’d still want to stay in the sports world

- she thrives in a setting where she is helping people

- sports medicine means helping people and also still having that proximity to tennis

- shes also good at her job because she’s able to deliver bad news with the utmost kindness and empathy since she gets it

- extremely well loved by all her patients, so she travels to multiple schools within the country since she can’t pick just one

- ask any college athlete and they have a story about how dr tashi duncan basically saved their career with her magic touch

- first doctor in her family and she’s so happy to be inspiration for kids in her community

- loves hearing people call her doctor, it proves that all her hardwork was well worth it

- tashi is the type to go all in with something so she’d be married to the job

Patrick Zweig

- he’d wanna be a stay at home husband

- joke but i honestly kinda struggled with this

- lowkey, i can see firefighter patrick….

- he needs something straightforward, something that doesn’t need mind games to solve

- being a firefighter is perfect

- go into burning building, get people out, pour water on aforementioned burning building, get praised for it

- it works for him

- enjoys the rush and excitement of the job

- also loves when he helps someone and they thank him with genuine words

- interested in all the work that’s adjacent to his (think emts, doctors, law enforcement)

- contemplated switching to the station’s emt team but decided against it

- he doesn’t have a family till later in life so the crazy hours don’t really bother anyone but him

- for this reason, he’s basically married to his job

tashi’s came to me the easiest (i am so passionate about her), art was a little harder, but patrick’s was so hard, i hope this lives up to your expectations! enjoy!

[artists-ally]

{Flatline} OFC x Harvey Specter {Pt. 3)

Uh ohhhh guys it’s Pt. 3 🤭🤭🤭 I am so excited for this. It’s honestly one of my favorite things I’ve written and I hope you all agree. There is a poll at the end so make sure to vote for that <3 enjooyyyyy p.s. I hope this does good justice for this series.

Pt. 1 Pt. 2 Character Playlist

Word Count: 12,795

Warnings: language, angst, anxious thoughts, one singular mention of sexual h*r*ssm*nt in regards to Harvey’s actions with Claudia, smut 18+, the tiniest bit of food play, dom/sub dynamics, praise kink go brrr

***Italic sections indicate flashbacks***

Summary: The aftermath of Harvey breaking his promise to Claudia.

Tagging: @rosedpetal @maxdamax @ashcosmo

~~~~~~

HARVEY'S POV

My legs were numb. That sort of numbness when something happens that you can’t explain. It felt like my life just flashed before my eyes. That image of Claudia’s shaking lip… hearing her broken voice… I don’t think I’ll ever get it out of my fucking head. 

“Harvey, I requested those trades be made an hour ago. Do you wanna tell me why… Harvey?”

I could see Jessica in front of me, but I couldn’t hear a damn thing she said. 

“Harvey, what’s going on?” She closed the door, and I put a hand out to steady myself so I wouldn’t fall on the floor. “What happened?” “I fucked up,” I whispered. 

“Yeah, no shit. You tanked our only opportunity to get a leg up on this Gustoson case. You’re damn right you fucked up-”

“No no,” I sat on the arm of the chair. My hands began to shake so I folded them together. Jessica saw. 

“What the hell did you do?”

“I yelled at Claudia…”

She just blinked at me. “Is that seriously what you’re concerned about? Yelling at an associate? Okay, you yelled at an associate, what’s new? That might as well be in your job description.”

“No no no I didn’t just yell at her I threatened to do the one thing that I promised I would never do and now she’s gone. She left. I can’t- I don’t- I never meant to hurt her but she suggested that we file a motion to dismiss and I got so caught up in my anger about her accusing me of using her that I lost my-”

“Using her? Harvey, what is going on?” “I’ll tell you what’s going on,” Donna barged in. 

“Donna please don’t-”

“Harvey and Claudia have been ‘working together’ for the last month and a half, when in reality he has been a selfish, lying, arrogant brat who has crossed so many lines it’s beginning to look like a Rorschach Test.”

“You know?” I felt my heart suffocate myself. I thought I was gonna throw up.

“In all honesty Harvey, no I didn’t. Not until Claudia just broke down in the elevator and told me everything. I cannot believe that you would use her like that. For your own personal satisfaction are you out of your fucking mind?” “Harvey, what the hell is she talking about?” Jessica’s voice was full of hostility. 

“He thought that it would be a good idea to boost Claudia’s confidence by getting into her pants.”

“Donna it wasn’t-”

Jessica scoffed, covering her face. “What the hell is wrong with you? This has got sexual harassment written all over it, Havrey. Could you really be that delusional?”

“For fucks sake it wasn’t like that!” I screamed. Genuinely screamed and paced around. “I didn’t use her, not intentionally. God dammit I haven't been able to think clearly since the first day that I saw Claudia. She is an incredible lawyer and all I wanted to do was give her something else to focus on because she was afraid to be in a room with me. I just- all I wanted to do was help her find a little bit of confidence and oh my god this sounds so much worse when I say it outloud.”

Donna and Jessica exchanged a look while I slowly felt like my heart was being ripped out of my chest and stomped on the floor with cleats. 

“Okay Harvey, sit down and tell us what happened,” Donna steered me away from putting a hole in the wall to my desk.

“I don’t even know, Donna.” “Well while you two enjoy going down memory lane, I’ll be fighting for our firm's life. If you two don’t get your shit together, and by you two I mean Harvey, then… I don’t even know then.”

She all but slammed the door on her way out, patrons on the other side sending worried glances our way. I turned my chair so they wouldn’t see me. 

“How long has this been going on?” Donna asked. 

I dug my nails into my skin. “Almost two months.”

“Two months? Harvey, how could you not tell me?” “Because I didn’t want to,” I admitted. “And partly because I kind of thought you already knew. You know, the whole ‘Donna superpower’ shit you do.”

“I know I can’t believe I missed it,” she took the chair in front of me. I glared at her so hard I thought I’d light that hair of hers on fire. “Okay bad time for a joke. So, bachelor, why don’t you start from the beginning. And please, I don’t need to know the dirty details, despite my curiosity. Claudia is like a little sister to me and I really don’t want to picture you and her and oh my god I already am. Ugh, please start talking so I don’t have to be tortured.”

So dramatic. I was good looking, and so was Claudia. Why wouldn’t anyone want to picture us together? Then my eyes snapped to the chair she was sitting on. Oh god. Donna was in the chair that I was the first time Claudia and I-

“Get up,” I blurted out, reaching for her and placing her in my desk chair. God dammit we used that one too. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.

We sat down on the couch and I rubbed my strained eyes. Here goes nothing. 

“When Sheila first sent over the recruits from Harvard, I interviewed all of them. Except for one. There were thirteen associates but I only had twelve meetings set up. So I asked Louis if he was interviewing any of the newbies and he said just one. Obviously this person was some sort of idiot to be going to Louis instead of me, so I popped in.”

“Well, Claudia I think that you have some unbelievable potential at this firm and I’d just like to- Harvey, what are you doing here I am in the middle of an interview.”

“Oh I know, I just wanted to drop by and see how it was going.”

In front of Louis was this warm, chestnut brown head of sleek, silk like hair. She was wearing a lavender blouse and a black maxi skirt with a slit to the knee. She had on these black flats with pearls on them. Summer had just ended, and there was some remaining sunburn on her nose and cheeks. Her eyes were surrounded by prominent lashes and eyebrows, a fine line of makeup between the two; lavender, to match the top. 

“It’s going great, now will you get the hell out and tend to your own interviews and stop barging in on my only one?”

“Harvey Specter,” I introduced, sticking out my hand. She looked from it over to Louis, who was just shooting me daggers. 

“You just can’t help yourself, can you?”“Louis, I’m not trying to woo your associate, I’m just introducing myself to her. We are kind of name partners, you know. It’s the courteous thing to do.”

Again, all she did was look at my hand before slowly standing up. I didn’t miss the way she tried to subtly wipe her hand on her skirt. 

“I’m Claudia. Claudia Martin.”

God dammit that was a pretty name. It sounded so sophisticated, so mature and would sound really nice next to mine. Or with mine. Harvey Specter and Claudia Martin. I don’t know why I thought of hearing or seeing ‘Claudia Specter’ one day, but I did. And I didn’t hate the way it sounded. 

“Welcome to Pearson Specter Litt,” I gave a nice smile. It was clear she was already intimidated to be here, I didn’t need to add to that fire. She barely looked me in the eye for two seconds, but those two seconds made my head spin. 

She had the most gorgeous eyes I think I’ve ever seen in my life. They were amber in the middle but had this ring of hazel around the outer rim. It was just… not something I’ve ever seen before. I didn’t want her to look away because I just wanted to keep looking at them.

And that blush… that I knew wasn’t her sunburn. Not the way it creeped up the side of her face, or at the base of her neck. 

Jesus Harvey, stop staring at her. You’re probably giving off major stalker vibes.

“Well I’ll be around if you need anything, Claudia. Don’t be shy,” I smiled, the best charming one I could. Her full lips were in a tight line, her fingers picking at each other before she sat back down with Louis.

“Okay so you sabotaged Louis’ meeting with Claudia and thought she was beautiful? Why didn’t you just say that?” Donna interrupted. 

“Didn’t you ask me to start from the beginning?” She snapped her lips closed. “So let me tell the goddamn story. Yes, I thought she was stunning. I mean, no one in their right mind would think otherwise. She is so pretty and so smart and twice the person I wish I could be. There is just something about her that I can’t shake from my memory.”

“Yeah we get it, you’re head over heels for Claudia. Now on with it I don’t have all day.”

I rolled my eyes. 

“That was the first time I met her. It wasn’t long after that she started working here when I talked to her again. She was just sitting at her desk, Griffin and whoever else crowded around the opposite end of the bullpen. She was excluded and it made me feel bad.”

I’ve always thought Griffin would be at the top of my list for top associates. He was like me; only shorter, not as good looking, and had blue eyes instead of brown. Did I mention he wasn’t as good looking? Anyway, I had only one intention: get Claudia alone so I could talk to her.

Every day since she started a few weeks ago, I have watched her get off the elevator, walk through the office, and disappear around the corner. It wasn’t fair that she got to look like that, walk like that, and no one was around to appreciate it. 

She was so fucking eye catching. And I didn’t want the other slobs at this firm to get to her before I could.

“Claudia, do you mind helping me with something for a few minutes?” I asked, voice just loud enough for Griffin to hear. 

She looked up, pen cap between her rosy lips, and blinked. That flush creeped onto her cheeks. I tried not to smile. 

“Sure,” she nodded once and stood up, following me out. 

I was not so subtle with the look that I gave Griffin, and he wasn’t so subtle with the way he spoke.

“Is there something you need, Harvey? Claudia is in the middle of a very important depo documentation. I’d hate for her to fall behind.”

What a dick. “No, Griffin. It seems like you’ve got more important things to do with your book club than working on whatever Louis assigned you, so Claudia will work just fine. I prefer an actually hard working associate to someone who’s discussing whatever mediocre steak dinner you had at Texas Roadhouse last Wednesday.”

“Griffin’s eyes simmered and shot daggers into Claudia. But he didn’t open his mouth. I thought about punching him in the face for looking at her like that, and that’s when I realized I was fucked. That I was willing to do that for Claudia when it was literally the second time I’ve ever talked to her.”

“I’ll say,” Donna huffed. “What happened next?” “I just had her deliver some letters for me to the courthouse. I asked her something about Griffin, if they were ever acquainted with each other.”

“And what did she say?”

“She told me that Griffin was a total douchebag and tried to use his social status to get a leg up on her in class discussions, cutting corners to discredit her. It was so unfair and I just-”

Donna put a hand on my knee. “Relax, Harvey. Griffin isn’t here, stop looking like you want to put him through a wall.” “Well, Donna, I do want to put him through a wall because he has been an asshole to Claudia for no other reason than she was good at her job. It makes me sick.”

“When did you start becoming so protective of her? I’ve never seen you like this with anyone other than Mike, Louis, Jessica and myself. You must… really really care about her.”

“I think it was during the mock trial. She was always off to the side, always attentive, but never spoke up. I couldn’t stop myself from glancing over at her every once and a while to see if she wanted to be included. But she never did.”

“This case may seem simple, but the husband is a grade A asshole. He has done everything to cover his tracks and is gonna come at us with everything he’s got. Find me some evidence and make it good.”

They all branched off, heading this way and that. Claudia went to the only logical place, right to me.

“Hi, Mr. Specter-sir. I just have one question about-about the case if you’ve got a minute. If you have somewhere to be I understand and I can ask later,” she said quickly.

“Of course, what do you want to know?” I couldn’t help but think her stuttering was cute. I knew she was nervous, specifically around me; she always seemed so tense with me, so I made sure to always speak quietly and calmly with her. 

“Was Mr. Saros the one who paid off that investment banker? Did the money come from his account directly or a different one?”

God she was so good. “It came from him and his wife’s joint account.”

Claudia had a slight grin to her lips, and she nodded before striding away. She was going to crack this wide open. I just knew it. 

I went back to my office to wait it out, to see if any one could come up with an idea before Claudia. Before I knew it, it was three o'clock and I had a meeting to go to for another case Mike and I were working on. When we got in the car, Mike was looking at me with a knowing smile. 

“What?” 

He shook his head, “Nothing, just wondering how long you’re going to pretend you’re not in love with Claudia Martin.”

“The first year associate?”

“Don’t pretend you don’t know who she is. I see you watch her like a starving animal every time she comes into the office. And every time she leaves. And every time she asks Donna something.”

Uh oh.

“Oh please, I have far better things to do than get involved with a first year.”

“You didn’t deny that you were in love with her.”

“Do you want to get smacked? Or I could kick you out of this car at sixty miles per hour, see how you like the taste of asphalt.” Mike did not know when to stop pushing my buttons. 

“I think you just proved my theory.”

“What theory?”

“That you are in love and you are incredibly protective of Claudia. I heard about what you said to Griffin when he offered his help because Claudia was ‘too busy’. You know he pawned that work off to her, right?”

My eyes narrowed and my jaw clenched, as well as my fists. I fixed my gaze out the window and took some deep breaths. Jesus… he had a point. A huge point. God dammit I’m in trouble.

“Mike knew before I did?” Donna sounded mildly offended. 

“Well, not really. I never told him what we were doing. But I did tell him that I liked her. And when he told me that Griffin was pawning off his work to Caudia it sent me into a spiral. Shit, Donna… I am in so deep with Claudia. I really fucked up. I mean really bad. I made a promise to her that I wouldn’t treat her like the other associates because she wasn’t like the other associates. She was Claudia. And Claudia was- is- so much better than the rest of them.” “Why would you make a promise like that if you knew you wouldn’t be able to keep it?” “I had every intention of keeping it, but then all the shit with started happening when Louis found out about Mike being a fraud and he took that fucking case with Gerard and I couldn’t hold it together.” “Why did you even make it in the first place?” Donna asked, but I really didn’t want to tell this story.

I sighed, the type of sigh that fills your whole body.

“I was going off on Griffin one day, for being an asshole to some of the other associates, about pawning off his work to Claudia and she saw.”

“Griffin, I don’t care whose idea it was. You were the one to destroy his work, so you’re going to face the consequences.”

“It was just a prank, the entire document wasn’t supposed to be deleted.”

“You think tampering with another associate’s work is a prank? I hope when you go home tonight you think long and hard about who you wanna be as a man because as of right now, there isn’t going to be anything for you to come back to tomorrow. And you better pray to whatever you believe in because if there’s one person you don’t want to make an enemy out of, it’s me. Do you understand that?”

He clenched his jax, shoving his hands in his pockets. “yes.”

“You are going to be Louis’ personal associate.”“No, no way you can make me work for that man. He’s a total airhead.”“Yes, he is, now you two have something to talk about. You can bond over your selfish, outrageous egotistical behavior, it’ll be just like looking in a mirror.”

“Harvey I’m-”

“I don’t care what you are Griffin. You have no right to treat the other associates like that, especially Claudia. If I ever catch wind of you throwing your work load on her again so help me God I will make sure it is the last thing you do at this firm.”

If my point wasn’t clear enough by my words, the look I gave him would certainly do. He left my office without another word and I followed his movements all the way. But my eyes met Claudia’s. And they were wide and panicked. She quickly scurried away, head down and steps fast. She looked so afraid. 

She wasn’t afraid of me was she? I mean, all I had done was rip Griffin a new one for being an asshole. And he deserved it, Claudia would never do something to deserve that kind of lashing. 

“And so I promised her. I fucking promised her that I would never flip out on her and then I went and did exactly. God Donna… I am so fucked up.”

Her slim hand rubbed up and down my shoulder, but I only wanted it to be Claudia’s. I wanted her right next to me so I could go through all of this with her and explain that it wasn’t just some fling. Not to me. Never to me. I never wanted it to be temporary, she was… she’s it for me. 

The familiar prick crept into my eyes, my nose, and the tears fell. Donna has only seen me cry a handful of times, but never over a girl.

But Claudia wasn’t just some girl. She wasn’t just some hookup or some prize to be won. She was Claudia Martin. My Claudia. The quiet, shy first year associate I had worked so hard to get out of her shell. It wasn’t just for my pleasure, I truly didn’t want to see her fall behind just because she couldn’t ask me a question.

I saw that look in her eye; hunger and determination. Just like mine. I wanted it to shine brighter than her smile. Which was equally as devastating as her work in the courtroom. But I just wanted her to feel comfortable around me and I didn’t know what else to do. She was like a frightened baby deer around me. A constant nervous wreck at the drop of my name. I didn’t want her to be afraid of me, I wanted nothing more than to be a safe space for her. 

And maybe it’s just because I’m an idiot, but I’m realizing now that maybe I’m the one who needed the safe place. To just have someone to go to all the time. To share all of my proud moments and sneak little kisses and touches here and there. 

I need Claudia. I need her.

Maybe I took it too far. Started at the wrong place. I should’ve offered to take her out to dinner instead of inviting her up for a drink in my office after her first case. I shouldn’t have done it so backwards, and it kills me that I’m only drawing that connection now. Why couldn’t I have thought of that earlier? She would’ve been so much better off without all the backwards, fucked up shit that I did.

But it was so nice. To finally have the one thing I have been craving for so long. She was so soft, and she was so sweet under my touch and I couldn’t help myself. As soon as I first kissed her it was end game. I didn’t want to kiss anyone else. I wouldn’t ever kiss anyone again, not the way I kissed Claudia. More than lust. More than just a desire. 

Her lips on mine made my head go blank. I had an awful habit of having work thoughts creep their way into my head every once in a while. But never with her. Even when we were only talking about work, I couldn’t think about it. I only thought about her. About how brilliant she was, about how soft and warm and perfect her lips were on mine. About how she always made me feel at ease and comforted. I doubt she could ever make anyone afraid. Except maybe an opposing counsel. 

If I ever had to face her in court… I know I’d lose. For one, I’d give her anything she wanted simply because she could put me on my knees with a single look. And normally I’d hate to let a woman have that much control over me, but for Claudia… I’d let her do whatever she wanted. And Second, she knows what to do. All the time. She never misses a beat, and is always listening. Even when you think she isn’t.

I am so in love with Claudia. I felt my heart crack open. My voice more or less does the same. 

“Harvey…” “I am in love with her, Donna. And I think I have been for a long time.”

She was quiet, and a throat cleared. Mike was there in front of me, his hands in his pockets, a look of worry on his face. “Is everything alright?”

I saw Donna shake her head out of the corner of my eye. She didn’t say anything, but I knew she wanted to. 

“I broke my promise to Claudia.” That was all I said. I heard his sharp inhale, and he came and sat in front of us. “God dammit Mike… I really messed up. I hurt the one person I couldn’t afford to and- and I don’t know what to do.”

“Go talk to her,” Mike said. “If you’re serious about how you feel about Claudia, then you need to go tell her that it was never… whatever you were doing before. She has anxiety, Harvey. She is going to let her brain tell her things about you that aren’t true. And you need to be there to soothe the fire before it does irreversible damage.” “Well, what do you and Rachel do when you get into an argument?” 

“Harvey,” Donna said, “You aren’t Mike, and Claudia isn’t Rachel. Whatever they do might not work for you. You need to do what feels right for you and your relationship.” “I don’t know if you know this Donna, but I haven’t done something like this before. I don’t know how to talk to her. How to not make her anxious around me.” “We’ll help you,” Mike nods, as well as Donna. “We can come up with a plan but right now we’ve got a bigger problem on our hands.” What could be more devastating than hurting Claudia? 

Nothing. The answer was nothing.

____

CLAUDIA’S POV

I toed off my shoes, leaving them in the growing pile by my front door. I sighed at it. Why couldn’t they just put themselves away? 

My splitting headache was doing nothing to help either. 

Before I could even get a thought about what I could cook for dinner, the doorbell rang. I swear to god if Greg was here asking me about those flowers on my wreath again I was going to smack him with it, throw it over his head and shove him back inside his apartment and-

“Claudia, it’s Mike. I know you’re here, can we talk?”

Mike? What the hell is he doing here? 

I seriously debated giving my best housekeeper impression and deadbolting the door. But it was Mike, and he hadn’t done anything to deserve a cold shoulder. Oh god, what if Harvey was with him and I was getting set up? Oh shit.

“No, Harvey isn’t with me. I promise.”

I stalked to the door, pulling it open and glaring up at Mike. “The last time someone made me a promise I regretted it.” He just pressed his lips in a flat line. “What are you doing here, Mike?”

“I’m here on behalf of Harvey.” “Why?” “Because he’s worried about you.” Why is he worried about me? He made it very clear he didn’t give a shit about me. “He’s beating himself up over what he did.”

“Good,” that I didn’t restrain. 

“Claudia, he is really shaken up right now. He didn’t mean to do what he did. Now, I’m not going to stand here and pretend I know all the details about what he did but-” “He used me, Mike. Plain and simple.” All I got was a raised eyebrow. “He told me he wanted to ‘build my confidence’ which I was actually naive enough to believe, and it led to my worst fucking nightmare. But he just got what he wanted, to get his dick wet and then was done with me.”

“Claudia, trust me, it wasn’t like that. Harvey would never use you like that. He wouldn’t dream of it, trust me.”

“Are you sure because it seems like that’s exactly what he did. He saw that I was hard working, manipulated me into working with him, and treated me like shit when I was just trying to find a solution to his goddamn problem. I have more self respect than that. To let him continue to get away with that.”

“Can I ask what he did?”

My throat closed, and my palms began to sweat. I knew my annoying blush was there by the way his eyes dipped to my neck. 

“After I won my first case with him, he invited me up to his office for some drinks. Said something along the lines of wanting to get to know each other so I didn’t have to feel so nervous. So I went up, and one thing led to another and… I don’t know why I let it happen. I knew it would end badly. I can’t believe I let myself believe that he would be into me beyond anything other than his pure primal satisfaction. But he seemed so genuine and so caring. Like he genuinely wanted to help me, and some part of me obviously thought it was a good idea because it happened again. And again. And again. God, I sound like the biggest loser right now.” “No you don’t,” Mike gave me a soft smile. “If it means anything, those feelings weren’t one sided. I know it doesn’t mean much of anything coming from me but… Harvey is really really fucking sorry about what he did.”

I was physically shaking. Through my trembles, I managed to speak, despite my thoughts trying to shut me down. “It hurt so bad, Mike. I really like Harvey, and I thought he might feel the same way. I guess I was wrong. So… so wrong.”

“No, Claudia you’re not wrong. Harvey is a grade A asshole but he wouldn’t-”

“If there is any chance of Harvey sorting this out, you need to tell him to grow a set and tell me himself,” I have no idea where this confidence came from. “He needs to stop getting other people to do his job for him. If he can’t recognize that now, of all times, then… then I don’t think he deserves me.”

Mike blinked long, rubbing his fingers over his mouth. “Harvey didn’t ask me to come here.” “What?” What? 

“Yeah,” he sighed. “I knew Harvey wouldn’t come tonight. I’m not sure he’ll come at all but… Claudia, he talks about you like I’ve never seen him talk before. He gushes over you to the point where it’s annoying. And when I went to go and talk to him about what our next move was for this case… Claudia, he was crying. He was sobbing with Donna in his office and-”

Good, I wanted to say. But it kind of crushed my soul. Harvey was crying over what he did to me. 

“I’ve never seen him cry before,” Mike looked hurt, too. “He regrets what he said. I know he does.”

“I believe you.”

“Good,” he nods. “I don’t want to do his job for him and I think-”

“But that doesn’t mean I will forgive him for what he said,” and with that, I closed the door, locking it for the night.

_____

Saturday and Sunday were so agonizing. The last thing I wanted to do was go into an office after a weekend of anything but rest and relaxation. I was tired and hadn’t showered and needed some restful sleep. Not to be woken up three times a night by dreams of Harvey touching me. Those certainly didn’t help. 

My mind kept replaying our first time together. Specifically when he said 'Oh, Claudia, you really are that innocent, aren’t you?’ Innocent and naive… just like he said that night. Who was I to think that Harvey would take any interest in me besides the fact that I was good at being a lawyer? I wasn’t special in any way, I think he just knew that I was easy to manipulate into doing what he needed. 

There was no way in hell I’d ever do another thing for Havrey, the all powerful jackass, Specter again.

As I set my stuff on my desk, Griffin walked up. Great. Just great, what did this prick want?

“Hey umm… Hi Claudia,” he rubbed the back of his head. “I just- I’m sorry. About all the things I’ve done to you. You didn’t deserve it and I want you to know that you have always been six-times the lawyer I wish I could be. I was jealous and took it out on you. And I shouldn’t have so… I’m sorry.”

Did I just hear that right? Did Griffin Harper just apologize to me? What the fuck is going on?

“Oh,” great way to start, idiot. “Thank you, Griffin.”

He just gave me a short nod before scurrying away. Well, that was… unexpected. Certainly I couldn’t ever let us be friends, but it was nice to know he wasn’t my mortal enemy any longer. 

I went about my business, plagued with thoughts and reminders of Harvey ever which way I went. Louis and Jessica sent me an email with some files to print out so I scanned them, proofed them, and sent them to the printing room. 

God it sent a shiver down my spine to be back in here after he… don’t finish the thought don’t finish the thought-

“Hey, Claudia,” Donna snapped me out of my heated thoughts. “How are you?” “You can cut the bullshit now, Donna.”

She sighed, “it was a genuine question.” “And that was a genuine answer. I’m not in the mood.”

“Claudia-” “No, Donna. What Harvey did wasn’t okay, and I’m not going to stand here and pretend like what he did didn't hurt. Because it did and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it ever since. I don’t need you here to remind me.”

“Have you ever considered that Harvey may want to fix it?”

“No, Donna. I haven’t. And I’m not going to,” I stood my ground, squaring off my freshly printed papers before making more copies for Louis. 

“What are you talking about?”

I scoffed. “Do you really think that I wouldn’t figure out what was going on?” “Again, what are you-” “I know Harvey just thinks that I am gullible and naive and easy to push around because he makes me nervous. And it’s true. Whenever I am near him I can’t keep myself composed and I’m sick and tired of being walked all over. I can’t believe I was stupid enough to let myself see otherwise, but I’m even more upset that you didn’t come clean and tell me.” “Claudia, no one is walking over you. And I didn’t know about any of this until you told me on Friday. Harvey came to you because he knew can rely on you and your abilities to get things accomplished. He wanted the chance to work with you and get you to trust him a little. You have to know that by now,” Donna was standing right next to me, blocking my way out. 

“Maybe I do, but that doesn’t mean that I believe it. Donna, I am not some corporate power house that is gonna bring firms to their knees. Not like he does.” “Nobody does what Harvey does.” “And that’s my point,” I grit my teeth. “Harvey was trying to make me into a mini version of him, just like he did with Mike and it’s not what I want to be. Donna, I am not assertive. I am not reckless and willing to go behind peoples backs to get the job done. I like rules and regulations and the law. They are there so people abide by them, and Harvey, more often than not, doesn’t do that. Yes, I look up to him as a role model because I admire his tenacity. But that doesn’t mean I like or agree with the things he does.”

“And you think that I like it when he goes and cuts someone’s legs out from under them?”

“I didn’t say that. But that means you know how I feel. I can’t- I don’t… I don’t want to be around someone like that. It makes me feel like I’m suffocating. And worst of all he gave me his word that he wouldn’t lash out and treat me like the other associates. I cant believe that I was stupid enough to believe that Harvey would-“

Both of us stopped as someone pushed through the door. 

Harvey…

“Donna,” Harvey’s mouth was pressed in a flat line. He jerked his head over his shoulder. Donna gave me a sympathetic look and turned on her heel. Where was she going?

“Wait, Donna don’t-” I whispered.

“You’ll be fine,” she gave me a firm look, patting my shoulder as she walked around Harvey. Oh my god… she set me up.

My heart felt like it was ripping out of my fucking chest. The last thing I needed right now was to be in an enclosed space with Harvey.

He stared at me, fussing with the cufflink on his shirt. “Claudia.” “I’m sorry, Mr. Specter, but I have to get these to Louis.” I tried to go around him, like Donna had, but he just let his body fall against the wall. Blocking the way. I couldn’t bring myself to look up at him and ask him to let me go. 

“I want you to listen to me.” His voice was stern, in a demanding way, but not in a pissed off way. 

“No, I am in a rush. Now if you’ll excuse me-”

“No,” he said with a shake of his head. “Come on, Claudia. Please just talk to me. I tried to call you but you didn’t answer and-.”

“I know, but I don’t want to talk to you. I want you to get out of my way so I can go do my job.” 

“A little feisty today, aren’t we?” He pushed off his shoulder, taking a step towards me, I took one back. And another as he took one. 

“No, I need to-” “Get those copies to Louis, I heard you,” Harvey acknowledged, but didn’t stop walking closer to me. My back eventually hit a copier and I almost fell over, but Harveys arms came to either side of my body, blocking me in. “And I don’t care.”

His face was inches from mine, chest inches from mine. I felt desperate for a breath. I forgot how to think, how to appear unphased. Everything he’s taught me has vanished from my mind. His eyes, much darker in this low over-head light, seemed to pierce my soul. 

“What… What are you doing?” My voice was barely audible. 

“I want you to know that I wouldn’t ever, ever, take advantage of you like that. I can’t even believe that you would think that. You think I enjoy making you a nervous wreck? Well, I don’t. It honestly makes me sick that even after all this time, you can’t trust me.”

“It’s not that I don’t trust you.”

“Then what is it? Because clearly I am not understanding,” his tone deepened, voice scratching in his throat. 

I couldn’t- I didn’t know how to admit to him-

“I- I umm… Mr. Specter I can’t-”

“Stop calling me that, please, Claudia. Stop seeing me as your boss for one second and see me as literally anything else.”

I swallowed. Nothing went down. “Harvey… you are… you scare me more than anyone else I’ve ever met.” “Why?” his brows knit together. “What is it about me that makes you so afraid of me?”

“Everything.” I was shaking, visibly shaking in front of him. I looked anywhere but his eyes because I knew if I did I’d crack open and bleed my heart all over him. 

His exhale was sharp enough to rustle the small hairs framing my face. “Claudia just-”

“I can’t be around you without feeling like I’m gonna drown in your presence.” 

He was stunned silent for a beat too long. “What is that supposed to mean?”

“Harvey I told you I didn’t want to-”

“Please, Claudia, tell me why you are so afraid of me.” He was begging. Begging for me to explain.

“Because I know that if I let myself think for one fucking second that you actually like working with me I’ll drop my guard around you. And I cannot afford to do that because there are things I keep locked inside that I would rather take to my grave than ever let someone know.”

“And what, you don’t think I’m equally as terrified to have these feelings for you?” “Not like mine.” Harvey gave me a very concerned glance. “There, you asked me to tell you. Please just let me go.”

“No, not until you tell me what is haunting you so much you’re willing to let it eat you alive rather than just let it out for once in your life. Look, I get that you’re a private person, and it’s hard for you to trust people, but that doesn’t mean you need to keep everything bottled inside and let it rot you from the inside out-”

“For the love of guard Harvey it’s you,” I shouted, far louder than I meant to. “It is you that is driving me insane. I cannot go a single moment of my day without thinking about you. I am terrified that you are going to see right through me and figure out that every thought that goes on inside my head has to do with you because for some reason, known only by some sick and twisted higher power, I want you to see me the way I see you. I want you to want me as much as I want you and-”

I stopped because I ran out of air. And then it hit me so hard I saw stars. What the fuck have I just done? My vision began to black out, my heart beating too fast for my lungs to keep up with. 

Harvey had backed up a step, mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water. 

I was going to throw up, I was sure of it. I tried to speak, but my mind had melted and oozed out of my ears. 

I ran, I left the copies on the floor; at some point I dropped them. And ran. His hand caught my elbow and I shrieked, whipping around just as Harvey slammed the door closed, pinning me, yet again. 

“You do not get to drop that ball and run away,” his voice had a darkness I’ve never heard. “Claudia, in what way do you want me?”

Frozen. My mind was utterly dysfunctional and useless. I couldn’t think, I’m surprised I remembered how to breathe. God his eyes…

“Claudia, please answer me.” Now his voice was tender, filled with warmth. His fingers tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear. “You have to tell me in what way now or I’m… you have to tell me.”

“Why does it matter? I've already ruined everything I’ve had going for me.” I was meek with my words. Wimpy. Cowardice. 

“Because it matters to me.”

“I want you, I want Harvey.”

“As in you want me, and not as your boss, Claudia?” He clarified. I had to shut my eyes, to turn my cheek to him so I wouldn’t see his reaction when I nodded in confirmation. “Fucking hell…”

“I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry. Just… just let me go and I can hand Jessica my letter of resignation right now and you never have to see me again-”

“Are you out of your mind?” Harvey’s caramel eyes were wide. “Claudia, I don’t want you to go. Not for one fucking second. Why do you even have a letter drafted?”

“But I just-” 

His fingers gripped my chin, forcing me to look up at him when I spoke. God dammit… Harvey’s thump caressed my lip, pulling it down and watching it spring up. Slowly, ever so slowly, he dipped it inside my mouth. I couldn’t help the soft noise that startled out of me. 

“Claudia… you have no idea how much I have been praying to hear you say those words. I have been driving myself out of my mind with what to say. How to say it and I- I don’t know how to tell you everything I’ve been wanting to. For weeks now.

“I have been thinking of you nonstop. I keep making up excuses and things to come see you during the day. I want nothing more than to get the chance to treat you right, and I want you to want it too. I promised myself I wouldn’t make a move unless you made one first because I knew how petrified you were of me. I can’t- I won’t have you be afraid of me if we do this.

“But I fucked up. I got ahead of myself and I didn’t go in the direction that I should've. I should've just asked you out to dinner, been a true gentleman rather than selfish. You have no idea how long I have been practicing what to say. I just made everything so much worse. And I wish like hell I could take it all back and do it all again because I am so so so fucking sorry for breaking my promise.”

I stared up at him, at the tears spilling over his lashes, and the flush on his cheeks. His lip quivered. He looked so vulnerable. So open and honest. Every part of me wanted to take it to heart, but that voice in the back of my head was telling me not to believe it.

“Harvey I-”

“Please, Claudia,” Harvey knelt to the ground, sitting back on his heels. “I will do whatever you want to gain your trust back. Anything… anything. But I can’t let you walk away from me. I want a real chance to make you happy, to give you every part of me. I will do or say or answer whatever you want but please do not leave me. If you truly don’t want me, tell me, and we never have to talk again. I will make it like I was never here in the first place if you told me to, but I don't think you want that. And I don’t want it either.”

Harvey was on his knees. Begging me to open my heart up to him. 

“Please don’t make me regret this, Harvey…”

He let out a breath, and a smile accompanied the tears that fell down his face. He reached for my hand, and I let him grab it. His fingers were warm and smooth in mine, familiar and comforting as he gently tugged me towards him. 

“I'm so sorry, Claudia. I will regret nothing more than the words I said to you. But I want to fix it, I want to be better. Not just for you, but for myself. But you are what makes me want to be better. I need to learn to control myself and take a page out of my own book to make that happen.”

Harvey rested his head on my stomach, and I let my fingers thread through his spiky hair. 

“But I don’t want you to be afraid of me anymore. I can’t- I won’t let you be afraid to ask me a question. I want to be there for you, work related or not, but I can’t do it if you don’t meet me halfway. I do remember you making me a promise back, to not see me as a monster.”

My hand stopped, and he looked up. I wanted to agree, but I was still upset, and he must’ve seen that. 

“Okay, that was a bad time to bring that up.”

“Yup.” 

Harvey huffed a laugh, standing back up. His smile was sweet, his finger gentle as it swept some hair away from my face. 

“You are the most beautiful girl I have ever seen, Claudia Olivia Martin.”

“How did you find out my middle name?”

“Donna,” he smiled wider. I just rolled my eyes. “I don’t really know how to do any of this, so I asked her for some help. I knew I had to do it myself. I just didn’t really know where to start and she’s… well, she’s Donna.” “Yes, she is Donna,” I smiled up at him. “But it’s gonna take me more than that to convince me.”

“Oh I have like seven other things lined up and ready to go. If you'd like to hear them. First, you are the most stunning, breathtaking, gorgeous woman I have ever met in my life. Second, I admire every part of you. All your good habits, your bad, your anxious thoughts and brave approach to life. Because they all make you you. Three, I am the biggest fucking idiot. For starting all of this off wrong, for yelling at you. For leading you to believe that I just wanted to get in your pants.”

“You’re also an asshole. A bit of a coward and a bitch. Did I say that you were an asshole?”

“Okay okay,” he placed his hands on my hips and I let him, doing nothing to hide the giggle that bubbled out. “Yes, I am all of those things. And, for the record, I did want to get in your pants, just not that way.”

“Of course you did, who could resist all of this?” My heart sped up when he looked at me over, a huge grin spreading his cheeks wide and bright. 

“Looks like you’ve gained a little confidence, huh?”

“Well, I did have a not so awful teacher. That was before he betrayed me.” “Are you gonna stop rubbing salt into the wound?”

I faked a ponder, “Nope.”

“Claudia,” he pressed a tentative kiss to my cheek, then gauged my response before placing one on the other. “Olivia,” another kiss. “Martin.” He kissed my forehead, then the tip of my nose. “I will never be able to take back what I said, but I hope you find it in your heart to give me a second chance. Even good people are great at making bad decisions. I know I can be a better man, and I know you know that too. Just one,” a kiss to my left cheek, “More,” right cheek, “Chance.”

His lips hovered over mine, waiting for permission before he pressed them into mine. My heart was beating so fast. So strong, all because of him. All for him. 

My eyes met his, “Okay, Harvey.”

Those devastating eyes ignited. His smile grew so wide I got lost in it with my own. I was pressed flat to him, my hands on his shoulders, his hands on my lower back. My ears were buzzing with my pulse and I hoped he felt how fast it was. Who knew Harvey had such a way with words? I wondered how long he practiced all of this in the mirror. Who knows, maybe he was secretly a hopeless romantic and-

“Claudia,” Harvey snapped me out of my daydream. 

“Hmm?” “Please tell me I can kiss you.”

Oh. Right. 

“And what if I say no?”

“Then I won’t.”

“And if I say yes?” “I’ll make sure it is the best damn kiss you’ve ever and will ever have.”

Sounds pretty good to me. I pressed up on my toes, arms wrapping around his neck, and finally let our lips say hello. It had been too long, It felt so right, so perfect. And I realized it felt like all the other times we’ve kissed; I didn’t want to kiss anyone else. I wanted to kiss Harvey. Harvey goddamn Specter. 

I should find out what his middle name is from Donna to surprise him. 

“Come over tonight,” he blurted out.

“What?” “Come over, let me cook something for you. We can make it our first date. A real date. Let me start this off on the right foot. Unless tonight is too soon and you need more time to heal and process or-”

“Just stop talking,” I literally put my fingers over his mouth. “I’d love to come over for dinner, Harvey.”

If I hadn’t been in his arms I’m sure he’d jump up and down out of excitement. He kissed me again, and again, and again. The slight stubble on his chin tickled my neck enough for me to tuck down into my shoulders when he kissed below my ear. 

“Hey, Claudia, I just want to make sure- oh. Well, this seems to be going well,” Donna had a proud smile on her face, arms crossed over her chest.

“It is,” Harvey beamed down, never taking his eyes off of me. 

“Good, I’m glad to hear it.”

“How much of this was your idea?” I asked. 

“I suggested he get a horse and carriage to surprise you on your way out but he knew you wouldn’t want a grand gesture,” She said. “So I think that should say it well enough as to who came up with all the ideas.” When I looked back at him, he had a flush to his cheeks, and hid his grin. 

“Wow, Harvey, I’m impressed.” “Well,” he shrugged. “I don’t know… I wanted it to be authentic and special. Something that you would take to heart and genuinely appreciate. So it’s the best I could come up with over the weekend because if I didn’t do it soon I was going to explode.”

“Seriously, Claudia. This idiot wouldn’t leave my house for two days. I had to kick him out so he could get a shower and change. Did you even sleep?” “You haven’t slept?” He shook his head. “Harvey, what- okay. We need to do our dinner another day because if you try to cook you might set your house on fire and that would-” “Nope, too bad. I’m fine, really Claudia. I can handle making dinner. I’ll leave early and take a nap if that would make you feel better.” “Yes, it would,” I sighed out, looking back at Donna who had a look that meant trouble. “What?” “You guys are adorable.”

I blushed. “Oh, wait! Before you go, what’s Harvey’s middle name? I mean, he went to you for mine so it’s only fair…”

“Don’t you dare,” Harvey pointed at Donna who all but melted the Wicked Witch of the West with her smirk.

“Reginald.”

“Reginald?” I repeated. “Seriously?”

“It’s a family name, alright?” He defended. “Now, if you two will excuse me I have a very important dinner to plan for an even more important girl. Donna, can you-” “Already cleared your schedule.”

“Remind me to give you a raise.” “Oh I’ve already written a bonus check, it just needs your signature.” “I’m surprised you didn’t forge it,” I snickered. 

“I would’ve but having Harvey do it makes it that much more satisfying.”

Harvey just shook his head, but smiled at us both. “I’ll see you tonight, is seven good?” “Sounds perfect,” I nodded, relishing in his warmth as he pressed one more kiss to the top of my head before leaving. 

“So,” Donna swayed on her feet. “I take it that things went well?” “Yeah, yeah it did. I was surprised, today has been so weird. Even Griffin apologized to me.” “Griffin? Really?” “Yeah,” I followed in step behind her towards the bullpen. “He genuinely apologized to me. It was so unexpected. Now this… I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t dreading this happening. But it turned out way better than I expected so I can’t complain. I need to stop expecting the worst case scenario all the time and believe that I can handle anything that comes at me.”

“Now that sounds like true growth and confidence,” Donna slung her arm over my shoulder. “And definitely something Harvey couldn’t have taught you.” “No, he didn’t. That was all on my own.”

___

As I packed up to head home for the day, my stomach was on fire with nerves about tonight. Not nerves, excitement. 

“Hey, Claudia,” Griffin caught up to me right before the elevator closed. “Do you want to join us for drinks tonight?”

I just smirked. “Sorry, Griffin. I can’t, I have a date with Harvey Specter.” And I let the door shut before he could get on.

____

This building. For fucks sake his front door cost more than what I make in a year, probably. The door man had given me a bit of a side eye when I asked to be let up to Harvey. Well, here I was. 

The bottle of wine in my hand wasn’t getting any colder as I paced outside of his apartment. Was I making this a bigger deal than it needed it to be? Most definitely. 

I knocked. 

Harvey opened it a few moments later, a smug look on his face. “I was wondering how long you were going to just stand there.”

God dammit. The heat rose up my neck and I looked away. “Just shut up and take the wine.”

He chuckled, plucking it from my grasp before stepping aside to let me in. I gazed up and into his hallway, following it down to the kitchen. Woah… holy windows. The already set sun lit up the sky with blues and purples, making all of this feel very cinematic. 

“You didn’t need to bring this, Claudia,” Harvey smiled nonetheless. 

“I just- I don’t know, isn't that what people do when they’re invited over?”

“Why are you still so nervous?” 

Right to it, I guess. “What makes you say that?” “Well,” he sighed, shoving his hands in his pockets. He was wearing all black. He looked… too good for his own good. Or mine for that matter of fact. “For starters, you’ve clearly been running your fingers through your hair. Second, I’ve watched you fiddle with that string on your sleeve at least four times now.”

My fingers ceased their motion. I had been toying with it. “I like to keep my hands busy.”

“I call it a nervous habit.”

“Did you invite me here for dinner or just to pick on me for being anxious?” 

“You have no reason to be anxious here,” he crept closer, taking my hand in his. Harvey gently kissed the back of my fingers. “There is no one here to watch, no prying eyes to hide from. It’s just me, Claudia.”

“And that is precisely what makes me nervous,” I did let a laugh bubble up. “But, you’re right. I guess there is no reason to be so… terrified.”

“Good,” he smiled, placing his hands on my hips. I let mine fall around his shoulders. “Dinner will be ready in a few minutes.” I turned to look behind me, a few pots and a pan of vegetables on the stove. Harvey’s hands still lingered on my sides as I peered over to look inside.

“I didn’t know the great Harvey Specter could cook,” I jabbed, making him roll his eyes playfully. “It looks lovely, thank you.”

“Told you, there’s more to the name than the title it comes with.”

From the table, I watched him plate the stir fry dish and bring it over. I was starving, and I made sure to eat my lunch a little later so I wouldn’t be ravenous by the time this dinner rolled around. I wasted no time taking a forkful and practically inhaling it. 

“I’ll take that as a good sign?” 

I nodded, “It’s amazing. Where did you learn to cook like this?” “Here and there. My brother owns a bar and restaurant back home, we used to like to cook together all the time.” “I didn’t know you had a brother,” I tilted my head. “That’s amazing, though. Glad you put those skills to good use.”

“Do you have any siblings?”

I hummed, “Yeah I have two brothers. I’m the baby of the family.”

“Am I going to have to win their trust one day?” 

My laugh echoed through the spacious dining room, “No, they’re pretty cool. Vince, my oldest brother, is married, has two kids who are in college. My other brother, Caleb, is the one you’ve gotta watch out for. He’s my twin and very vocal about the men in my life, especially when he doesn’t think they’re good enough for me.”

“I see,” Harvey gave me a look I knew all too well. 

“Yeah, he can be a pain in my ass sometimes. But I love him, he always stood up for me when I was too afraid. Whether someone was picking on me in school or tried to get one up on me at a bar, he was always there. He’s just protective of me, they both are, but Caleb… he’s always had my back.” “It’s good to have those types of people on your side,” Harvey’s smile was so bright. 

For about an hour we ate and had dessert. I don’t know how, he probably asked Donna, but he had my absolute favorite chocolate cake. Coated in a thick butter cream, it practically melted in my mouth. I wasn’t shy about telling him how delicious it was. 

“I could marry this cake,” I knew I was being dramatic, but I didn’t care. “If I could take this cake, and mold it in the shape of a man, I would.”

Harvey grinned, looking from the cake on his plate, back up to me as I spooned another mouthful. He dipped his finger in the frosting and swiped it across his cheek. I blushed, so hard, and he just laughed and laughed. 

“You think you’re funny, huh?” I had to put my face in my hands. 

“I do, actually. Why don’t you come over here and clean it off for me,” Harvey spoke dangerous words. I raised my eyebrow in question, but he merely scooted his chair back in response, palms turned upward. 

Now or never, I thought. 

I stood, my bare feet padding quietly to Harvey. This is where I had confidence. Could use his own game against him. Because up until this point, all Harvey knows about me is that I am a nervous wreck in front of him. 

The cards have no longer been dealt in his favor. 

I swung my leg over his, perching on his thigh. I took my thumb and ran it across his face, collecting the decorative icing off his cheek, licking my thumb clean. His eyes tracked my movements, especially when I stuck out my tongue and showed him the mess.

His throat bobbed, and his eyes darkened. 

“Where did that shy, blushing Claudia go?” Harvey’s voice sent a chill down my spine. 

“Away, for now,” I smirked. “There are plenty of versions of Claudia you haven’t met before.”

“And who exactly is this version?” He asked.

“That depends,” I huffed. “Are you going to let me have what I want or are you going to make me earn it?”

Harvey’s hands crept up my thighs, cupping my ass gently. “You’re gonna let me choose?”

“You better choose carefully.”

“And why is that?”

“Because,” I said. “You can either let me take what I want, or try to take what you want. But I’ll let it be known, that isn’t possible. You won’t be able to resist me long enough to uphold that promise.”

“Oh, you think I’m that easy?” Harvey countered, tightening his hold on my body. I let out a whine, enticing him into my game further. 

“I don’t know, Harvey.” I ran my hand down his chest, grinding back and forth on his thigh. I leaned close to his ear, “I can be your every fantasy or your worst nightmare.”

I pulled away from his body, taking a few steps back and towards another hallway. I assumed that’s where his bedroom was, and judging by the screeching of the chair against the floor, I was heading in the right direction. 

The first door I pushed open was, thankfully, the right room. His clothes were hung up neatly in the closet on the opposite side of the room, the city below shining onto the walls. Harvey shut the door quickly, turning on a lamp beside his bed. 

Harvey grinned like the devil and crushed his mouth to mine. I didn’t waste any time letting his tongue tangle with mine. Harvey kissed like the god he was, like a true emperor. He tasted like pure sin, like the cake we were just sharing.

My hands went to the buttons on his shirt, fitting them through the tiny holes and pushing it off his shoulders. 

“Mmm wait, sweetheart,” Harvey broke our lips apart. “I don’t wanna do it this way tonight. Let me take care of you. Please.”

Well, when he sounded like that, who was I to resist him? I let him lay me down, his body between my legs as he placed the most tender kiss on my lips. He moved down my chest, slowly lifting my shirt and placing his mark on my stomach. Up my chest, and my neck. 

“You are so beautiful, Claudia. And I can’t believe I get to have all of you to myself. I can’t wait to make you feel so good.”

I sighed out, letting my eyes close as he explored my body. He was forward with his choices, but he wasn’t ever harsh. He was so soft. So loving and so caring. No one had ever made me feel equally nervous or excited as Harvey did. But now… I wasn’t afraid of him. I don’t think I could ever again. 

“Is it okay if I take these off?” “I wasn’t sure you knew how to ask for permission,” I giggled. He just scowled, but I nodded. “Of course, Harvey. Do whatever you want.” “Don’t-” he swallowed. “Don’t say things like that when I am trying to be sweet and nice to you.”

“I think you’re forgetting that I like it when you manhandle me,” I smiled up to the ceiling before looking at him between my legs. “Sorry, carry on.”

He laid a not so gentle tap to the inside of my thigh before removing my skirt. The chill of the air spread goosebumps across my skin, even more when he placed kisses from my ankle to my hips bone. 

“God I could spend all day between your legs. They’re so perfect,” he praised, spreading them wide so he could fit his torso between them. “You’re so fucking hot, Claudia.” I flushed, beet red, and turned away from him. But his fingers brought me right back. 

“You don’t get to be shy now, sweetheart. Not tonight, let me see all of you.”

“I’m all yours Harvey.” Our eyes locked, and the sparks flew. His lips were on mine, hurried, but not starving. It was intense and passionate and everything I could’ve asked it to be. He lifted my shirt over my head and slipped off my bra from behind. Thankfully his chest was warm against mine.

From one second to the next, Harvey swooped me on top of him and rolled, tugging the sheet with him. When they were freed, he laid me back down and put them over his body. 

“Oh, guess I should get these off,” he grinned, pushing his jeans down his thighs, his briefs going with them. Man… what a sight to behold. Harvey wasn’t shredded, but it was clear his boxing habits kept him in good shape. 

There was something about him that just made me want to crumble and fold. 

Harvey’s lips were hot as they moved all over me, nipping and biting and leaving tiny marks here and there. Before he could lose all his resolve, he reached over to his bedside table and plucked a foil packet from a little jar. Classy. 

“Doing okay, sweetheart?” He smoothed down my hair. 

“Yes, Harvey. I’d be better if…” I locked my legs around his middle, pulling him to me. “You just got on with it.” “Such an impatient little thing,” his grin gave away his facade. 

“Oh please, don’t act like you’re not craving this as much as I am.” “You’re right,” he smirked, lining up and pushing all the way in. a low groan escaped his flushed lips. “But I know you can’t get enough of this.”

I breathed heavily, clinging to him. His hips stirred, slowly pulling back, and sinking all the way in. Harvey rested his head on my shoulder, tongue making patterns on my ignited skin. I tugged at his hair, lips working on their own to find all his sweet spots. 

I raked my nails up his back, not missing when his hips slowed and he moaned. So I did it again. His thumb found its way between my legs and circled around where I wanted it most. He wasn’t kidding when he said he was going to take care of me. 

Harvey took his time, making sure that I was feeling good and got what I wanted. This was so different from the feverish moments we’ve had in the office. But it was somehow way better. Well, it could use one thing.

As he laced our fingers together, I moved our hands up. He stopped kissing me for a moment to give me a puzzled look. But I slipped his grip from mine and placed his hand on my throat. 

“I don’t need you to go all ‘sir’ on me tonight, but just give me this. Please.” I did the best I could with my eyes to lure him in, and it worked. It tightened, but it was never tight. It was just there, a reminder of the part of him I was going to get to see whenever I wanted. 

He started to let his control slip, and I knew it was hard for him to be so gentle. But I appreciated it so much. I let some of my control slip as well, just because I wanted to rile him up. His breath quickened, and so did his hips. His thumb was relentless between my legs and I could feel my high approaching.

“Come on, sweetheart, let go. Make yourself feel so good for me.” There it was, the Harvey that kept me up at night. That has plagued my dreams for the past few days. 

I met his hips with mine, and my release crashed over me when I wasn’t expecting it. I shook in his arms as he continued to move, chasing his own time. 

“Fuck, Harvey,” I gasped. “Let go for me, you did such a good job making me feel good.”

He cursed, tucking his head down momentarily before crushing his mouth to mine, not shy about how I was making him feel. His body went rigid, and the praise streamed out of his mouth.

“Fuck fuck Claudia… god you feel so good. You are so perfect for me. So soft and warm.”

My lips would surely be bruised tomorrow morning, but I didn’t care. All I cared about was being here with Harvey. About carrying him through the aftershocks of his release. I rubbed at his back, kissed his neck and cheeks. When he lifted his head, he had this dreamy look on his face. 

“You look so hot,” he ran his thumb across my cheek, bringing me in for another kiss. “Thank you for giving me a second chance.”

“I’m glad I decided to do it. I can’t decide which Harvey I like more. This one or the one who calls me sweetheart.”

“Did I not call you sweetheart tonight?” “You did, but not the way you do when I call you ‘sir’.”

“Ahh, I see,” he smirked. “As much as I would like to think that I could flip a switch right now, I don’t want to spoil this moment with you.”

“If you don’t want to spoil it, then you should take us into the shower.”

And then I was in the shower. Hot water streaming between us from the rain shower head. His hands were soft as he kneaded my body; they particularly felt nice on my ass, especially when he added his lips to the mix. 

“You are so amazing, Claudia. I cannot stress that enough.” “You’re doing an amazing job,” I smiled, kissing him. “You’re not so bad yourself.”

“I know,” he grinned, smacking my ass before lathering up his hands and running them through my hair. It was hard to not fall asleep standing up. “Sweetheart, if you keep making those noises it is going to be very very hard to not take you right here.”

My eyes flew open, his very apparent arousal pressing into my backside. Well, alright then. Go Claudia, you sexy son of a bitch!

“And who’s to say that I wouldn’t want that?” “I am trying to hold back, you know. I wanted tonight to be different, to be special. I didn’t want it to be heated and rough and-”

“Harvey,” I turned, pressing a hand to his chest. “I know.” “I wanted to ‘make love’ or whatever they call it in those cheesy romance books you read.”

I laughed out loud, picturing Harvey curled up on the couch with a book in his hand, a fire in the fireplace. “Nobody says ‘making love’ any more, babe.” “Babe?” “Yeah, babe. I figured you wouldn’t like sugar, or honey bun, or baby for that matter.”

“Don’t make me sound older than I am, please. For fucks sake I passed the Bar when you were in highschool.”

“It doesn’t bother me all that much anymore,” I admitted, wrapping my arms around his neck. “I thought it would, but it doesn’t really make a difference to me.”

“Good, I’m glad it doesn’t freak you out,” he smiled. “And, for the record, I hope it doesn’t freak your folks out.”

“It won’t.”

He lifted up a brow, “How could you know?” “Because I already told them about you.” I felt him go tight. “Relax. They knew who you were already and they couldn’t have been more excited that I found a caring, respectful, well respected man.”

He let out a sigh, “and your brothers?” “They don’t know yet, but don’t worry about them, either. It will be okay.”

“When did you become the consoling one? It’s weird.” “I know, right?” I giggled. When I looked into his eyes, there was a fondness to his gaze. He was looking at my body, but not in a way he had before. “Why are you looking at me like that?” Harvey shrugged, “I just love you so much, Claudia. And I am so proud of how far you’ve come in just these first couple of months.”

My heart hitched in my chest, then beat so wildly I wasn’t entirely sure it didn’t burst through my skin and land in his hands. I froze. Mike had been right. Harvey wasn’t just some cock, high strung New York attorney that couldn’t decipher his own feelings. He seemed incredibly in tune with his emotions and that couldn’t be more attractive. 

I just kissed him. I didn’t know what else to do other than kiss him. He had to take a step back to support our combined weight. Harvey’s arms were strong around my waist, his lips reassuring and just as firm as his grip. 

“I love you too, Harvey. So fucking much.”

____

The comforters pulled tight, Harvey's body pressed behind mine… I couldn’t think of a more relaxing way to end the night. Especially after I slipped to my knees in the shower and showed him just how much I loved him. 

“You don’t know how long I’ve been dreaming about having you in my arms one night. All night long.”

I hummed, scooting back so his chest met my back, his legs molding with mine. “I may have fantasized about it once or twice as well.” “Have you now?” “Again, there are several versions of Claudia you haven’t met before.” “And I look forward to coaxing every single one of them out with my mouth… my tongue… my hands… my-”

“Tomorrow,” I whispered, letting my eyes lull shut. “We can do it all again tomorrow. On the table, on the counter, on the couch-” “You’re not helping the situation here, you know,” he tugged at my half-dried hair. “Don’t get me started, sweetheart. I just might not let you get any sleep tonight.”

I clenched my thighs together. This was going to be such a sweet, tortuous game to play. And I got to play it every day. Every night, if I wanted. He wouldn’t be able to resist me. I had a secret weapon.

“Whatever you say, sir.”

His hand was wrapped around my throat, forcing my head to turn back to look at him. He clicked his tongue, eyes more awake than they had been a few minutes ago. “Oh sweet, innocent little Claudia. I guess you haven’t learned your lesson yet. It’s okay, I’d be happy to give you more instruction. I think I recall saying that eventually I would break you down over and over again until all you could remember was my name and how to breathe. Well, sweetheart. What do you think? Because I think you can still form coherent thoughts. I think it’s time we change that, don’t you?” I nodded, “Yes.”

His grip tightened and tightened and tightened. “Yes what?”

I smirked, climbing into his lap and taking him into my hand. “Yes, sir.”

[beauspot]

The Bear Season 2: And Why I’m Fucking Annoyed (Full Spoilers below)

*Long Post*

The Bear is something truly special. When it dropped in June of last year it wasn’t a major hit right away. It was a sleeper and it grew its fanbase over time. If you were here this time last year you remember how small the fandom was posts on every platform could barely reach 200 interactions, but with the Golden Globe wins and the word of mouth this fandom began to grow and expand, because season one of the show was just so good.

Season 2 however is an interesting piece of media. I am well aware that I have some bias in this department and I can’t view this season objectively, but neither can the rest of you so I’ll say what I want.

To start off I really enjoyed some of the episodes this season, the first two? Excellent. The Marcus Episode(with my husband Will Poulter at his side)? Fantastic. The Richie Episode? Perfection. And let’s not even talk about Fishes, which was beyond words. I genuinely went into this season wanting to like it and praise it the way I did the previous season because I thought it was good. The writing—which is spectacular in nearly every other place—takes a nosedive with this romance plot. I still do think it’s good, but I can’t act like this whole season hasn’t left a sour taste in my mouth, because it has. Because the show runners are lying racist misogynistic nasty assholes who bullshitted us for nothing.

Toward the end of last year/beginning of this year Chef’s Kiss fans words made their way to some journalist who then asked about the potential for it with the actors and the writer( in an article stupidly named “don’t worry the bear doesn’t want carmy and sydney to kiss, either” the writer of which goes on to ship carmy and marcus so clearly they have excellent taste 😒) who all shut it down. Fine. That’s fine. That’s their opinion and it doesn’t affect us. What bothers me is the words of the co-creator Chris Storer who said this 👇🏾

He went on to say the show was also just meant to be focused on these people doing their jobs. So fine. We said even if it won’t be canon there’s no way they would bring in a new love interest cause that’s not “the vision” they have for the show, right?(He also goes on in the pic above to act like we couldn’t separate our love of the plot of the show from the ship which is…infantilizing and annoying) continuing on though, he also said this

He thought it would be cool to see a show with no romantic plot. Mind you this statement was made in January and the show starting filming in February. So unless they want me to believe they added this romance plot as some last minute thing (which very well could be the case as Claire has quite literally no personality outside of being pushy and being Carmy’s girlfriend) they knew they were having a romance plot in the second season and chose to lie about it. So the actors, the creator, basically everyone who was apart of this project said that Syd and Carmy were a weird ship (a strange thing to say to your, at the time, small audience even if that’s how you felt) just for them to turn around and have Carmy with a new love interest from school and have Sydney and marcus develop feelings for one another in the second to last episode? can y’all be fucking forreal for one minute?

Suddenly all you “yesss let men and women be friends, not every show needs romance” ass bitches want to ship something. I can tell you know Syd and Carmy have chemistry otherwise you wouldn’t have been shaking in your boots hoping the writers wouldn’t get them together. There was some dumb post i saw rooting for Claire and Carm but then adding ‘no one was better than platonic Sydcarmy’…

I see you.

I spoke about this before, but this constant sidelining of black women in these types of shows irks me. Sydney is basically hunting Carmy down for 85% of the season because he can’t do his fucking job he’s so consumed with Claire. And I know people are gonna say i’m being overdramatic, but it’s so clear they just did not want their main white boy to be with a black girl. Something that happens over and over and over again so many fucking times you can just lose count. Carmy, who in season one was so in tune with Sydney’s emotions he quelled his own anger and anxiety to ask if she was ok now ditches her at their restaurant to go help some girl he hasn’t seen since high school. He ditches her to go to a party then has the nerve to bring up Claire’s helping to inspire him.

Like yeah no shit Sydney is sorry that she’s there, y’all are opening a restaurant together which could fuck both your lives if it fails and Carmy is off doing god knows what instead of his job!

WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED?!? And yeah, Carmy fucks it up at the end with Claire but that doesn’t negate the rest of the season. Chef’s Kiss shippers are strange and delusional and the show doesn’t need romance and then Claire is half naked in Carmy’s apartment? Look Carmy deserves happiness, his life has been basically nonstop stress and trauma since he was a kid and him ending the season thinking he doesn’t deserve fun or love is heartbreaking because it isn’t true, he deserves all the love in the world especially since he is actively trying to break the cycle (along with his sister). That doesn’t negate the fact that he agreed to being partners with Syd and then left her to make decisions on her own about a business they agreed to start together. Which is why he apologized and rightfully so.

And I know for a fact annoying Sydney and Marcus shippers are going to be like “well ackshully they are clearly setting up Sydcus this season so how can they hate black women.” I love Marcus as much as the next person and honestly after I saw where the writing was going I was like fuck it why not at this point, but if Sydney and Carmy’s shippers were living off crumbs Sydney and Marcus shippers were living off the memory of food. But sure that ship had development.

also no i don’t fuck with that syd and marcus ship because why the fuck are you snapping at sydney cause she rejected you and it wasn’t even really a rejection that was very incel core and it’s not about being upset half the kitchen is always screaming about something, it’s why he snapped at her.

I’m just angry so yeah fuck this show.

I’m genuinely contemplating if I want to watch the next season at all. I said if they wanted to go no romance, fine go no romance, but to not only lie about that but bring in some whole new girl we don’t know and throw the black girl to the closest guy despite the fact Sydney and Carmy are more alike than anyone else? You clearly need to do some introspection and think about why you can view Sydney and Carmen as friends but get sick at the thought of them being more.

There is a possibility (a slight possibility) that they are playing the long game we wanted, but i am wary because they lied and put a manic pixie indie girl in as a love interest this time and it sucked. But then I remember the scene with Syd and Carmy under the table and how open and honest they were with each other and even though their relationship wasn’t the best this season I can see it’s potential, because that one scene had more chemistry than all of that other ships other scenes combined. I don’t know.

This got me thinking though Will Poulter romcom when? I will be seated. Also the consensus on twitter is that people really didn’t like Claire and thought the show should have ditched their plot all together so that’s nice. A lot of people seem to think this is a setup for sydcarmy and idk, maybe i’ll rewatch when i’m more calm.

[the-bitter-ocean]

oceaaaannn hiii! let's go with 3, 5, and 15 for the isat ask game c:

(MAJOR A6SE / 2HATS SPOILERS + FULL GAME SPOILERS AHOY) Thank you for the questions @dekupalace ! Since I’m going to be talking more in depth about the game for one of these questions I’m going to put my responses under a read more:

3- favorite soundtrack?

Oh god that’s such a hard question the whole game has certified bangers. The musicians at Studio Thumpy Puppy were not messing around or pulling any punches. The soundtrack of the game elevates literally every emotional beat. If I was forced to choose only one song out of the soundtrack my favorite track in the whole game has to be “How Can You Help Me, Stardust?” aka the theme that plays when you fight Loop at the Favor tree during act six. Hearing that for the first time while getting the full context of loop’s backstory made me go crazy. It was so fucking emotional and well done. That and it’s just objectively a super intense high energy song that makes me wanna dance around. If anyone deserves the coolest fight theme in the game, it’s Loop.

5- favorite optional event?

Ooh this is also a hard one! I adore a lot of the optional story events because each of them really shed light on Siffrin’s mental state /characterization, as well as gives depth to other aspects like the other character of the world building as a whole which strengthens the themes of the story. Aside from the obvious choice (2Hats Ending/ Act six loop encounter) I think my favorite optional event would have to be the “Who Was Phone” achievement (Change God event). There’s something so fascinating about learning about the Change God. Someone who clearly adores their certified little guy (Mirabelle) and is willing to offer words of kindness and assurance in her identity even if it knows she won’t remember in one instance..and then in the very same breath tell Siffrin that they enjoy watching Siffrin in the timeloop torment nexus because they’re curious to see how they change in a situation where everything is forced to stagnate. It was so genuinely fucked. I will think about it always forever.

15- anything you’d change about the game? be it game mechanics, a new feature, a change in plot, etc

Overall I’m pretty satisfied with the game both in story and gameplay actually. I think Adrienne did a good job writing and expanding on the characters and story that was set up in the prologue. The quality of life in terms of gameplay got improved since the previous game as well ( those who played the prologue can attest to this) . The fact that it was a in universe story reason as to why makes it all the more satisfying (if you want to know what I mean by that please read my mutuals @felikatze analysis about it here.)

I just am happy that Siffrin got to be happy in the end and stay with their family, to be able to talk things out and escape the loops. I know some people didn’t like that or expected a more darker/sadder ending or wanted the gameplay to be more challenging … my response to that is Literally Just Play Start Again: A Prologue. To me it would be extremely reductive to have Siffrin just suffer with no reprieve or escape from the loops (because that’s just a repeat of what happened in its predecessor) or have the group just split off from each other immediately after everything happened. It would have been extremely unsatisfying and ultimately missing the point of the themes of the game as a whole gonna be real lol.

The only things I’d maybe change or add is like it would’ve been cute to see Euphrasie and Claude be together/ reunite on screen in act 6. They should kiss. Lol. (That and just I would’ve personally loved to see Euphrasie in canon expanded on a little more but that’s not necessarily needed she serves her purpose in the narrative. I just like analyzing her and giving her more depth and I like when others do too, but that’s what fanart/ fics and aus are for so I’m not fussed.) 

I don’t mind that the game is sort of open ended and doesn’t answer all the questions. I think that gives artists, fanfic writers, Au makers and people who like to analyze the game more freedom to come up with their own interpretations for things that happened in pre canon and post canon which to me is more interesting. I know Loop disappearing at the end of the game in both endings is sad/ bittersweet but I wouldn’t necessarily change the way that was structured either. I like that their fate was ambiguous because it leads the viewer to come up with their own theories as to where they went. ( personally I love seeing stuff where loop gets to travel on their own and form a new life and identity outside of the loops and learn to heal, as well as post game getting to meet back up with the party and learn to navigate this new life/ change one step at a time. )

[datamined]

Not sure where to ask this, so im posting here as well as some forums BUT:

Basically I really love using Figma for making interactive menus. I have used Figma for mocking up websites and mobile apps before at my job, and in my odd time I’ve taken to using figma to prototype and make sketches of things like UI and flowcharts for the game my friends and I are developing. And even more recently I prototyped a fully custom, nice-looking, interactive character sheet for my character in the current campaign im playing.

Now, It’s got me thinking: I would really, really love to build custom character sheets for people as a side job as its something i genuinely enjoy doing. But the problem is, figma will not exist forever and I have foreseen that it might be a pain to build someone a prototype and I am the sole person to make updates whenever their character levels, they get new gear etc and I don’t really like the idea of forcing people to make an account for a tool they wont want to learn or use outside of the prototype i send them. Additionally, Figma prototype is ultimately not ideal for more distinguished and specific character sheets as I’d like for it to be.

For example, I would love to make buttons that a user can tap to mark how many death saves they have succeeded or failed, I want the user to be able to mark for inspiration and conditions, etc. I know I could possibly feasibly make it work all inside one scrollable frame, but the way I prefer to set up the character sheets requires navigating to different frames with buttons.

What other good alternatives are there? I like to make these character sheets for mobile use (phones and tablets) so should I jump to app development? I don’t mind learning new or more complicated softwares, just as long as the software is free, there’s a free trial long enough for me to learn the gist of the software, a single larger purchase for a license for a good amount of features, or the cost for subscription is low. Is Godot a good software to use for this? My team is learning godot anyway for our game as we were discouraged from Unreal Engine.

[thyme-in-a-bubble]

nsfw massage therapist!steve hcs

A/N: this super old, but used to be pretty popular. I genuinely thought it was lost, but I somehow found the doc again.

∼ gentle reminder that feedback, but especially reblogs are the way you support writers on here ∽

masterlist | join my taglist

So, your mom was meant to go to the new spa that just opened up in Hawkins, but at the last minute, something came up, and her being the darling mom that she is (aka it was too late to get the money back) she let you go and enjoy it. 

“Okay let’s get started on your massage. Would it be alright if I lower your towel a bit?”

“Steve? You work here?”

“Y/n? I-, um, y-yeah.”

“Since when?”

“Since the beginning of the summer. Pays a lot better than the place I worked last year.”

“I’m sorry, but how did you get this job? Is the real masseuse out sick or something?”

“No, they make you take a few courses when you first start here. So, if it’s my capability you’re worried about, don’t be.”

The dude you had had a crush on for years worked at the spa.

Not only working there, he was the one actively gliding his palms all over your back.

At some point, he started talking to you, as if he just couldn’t hold it in any longer. Just the kind of talking you have with a friend you haven’t seen in a long time. 

It was nice. Honestly helped you relax more than the touching.

You didn’t really notice the fact that this all (of course) was turning you on till he started massaging your legs. 

It felt like falling asleep. Slowly and then all at once. 

the way that his fingers dug into your thighs, you couldn’t stop your mind from wandering…

what if his fingers moved up, just a little higher and dug into something else?

oh fuck

he could probably smell it on you

could he? 

This was Steve Harrington. He knew the smell of a pussy happy to see him.

if he made you roll around, never mind your flushed face, he would 100% be able to see your nipples even through the thick towel.

But, sadly, he didn’t do anything. Only his job.

“Um, thank you, Steve,” you said once the massage was over, now fully covered in a way too big bathrobe, “gotta say, I didn’t think you’d be that good.”

He didn’t answer right away, just stood there staring at you.

“What are you doing tonight?” he breathed out, not taking his eyes off of you for a second.

“I don’t know… what am I doing?”

“Hanging out with me?”

“Hanging out? Like a…”

“a date? Yeah.”

On the date, you were all amped up, your brain still foggy from the memory of his hands on your body, so you were constantly on that edge like is he gonna just dick me down now? Like, I know that we’re talking about puppies right now, but is he though?

But alas, he didn’t. 

But he did kiss you…

The kind of kiss that had you floating for days

Floating right into the spa again to get another massage from him.

Did you just come for that dick? 

Yes.

Yes, you did.

You were a woman on a mission!

And that mission was to get dicked down in the spa.

Now, he wasn’t blind

He could tell from the moment you stepped in the door what you were on about.

But he played along, acted all surprised to see you and asked you to lay down. 

Before he could walk out of the room to give you the privacy to get situated on the table, you dropped the robe and with a playful grin, you skipped past him and onto the table.

It knocked the air clean out of him

but still, he just let out a stunned, breathy laugh and got to work. 

“Hey, could you move a little lower?” you asked as he was already halfway down your back, working the roots of his hands into your oiled up body. 

“Here?” he moved down to the small of your back, digging in his thumbs.

“Little lower…” you drew out, practically purring. 

“Here?” he went as low on your back as the small towel across your bottom would let him. 

Turning your head, you blinked up at him, slowly making him rip his eyes off of your skin. 

“Steve...” your eyes flickered down to see the painfully obvious tent in the grey sweatpants of his uniform. 

“Mhm?”

“You’re not gonna reach it with the towel still there…”

“you’re gonna be the death of me, I swear,” is all he muttered through his bright grin before tossing the towel off in who knows what direction and going to town on your ass.

Massaging it, that is…

Arching your back, pushing into his hold, you groaned, “please…”

He was teasing you like this on purpose. 

Going just close enough to make you stop breathing and then easing back. 

“Steve… please stop teasin-“ your warning was cut short when the pad of his thumb brushed through your leaking slit, playing with the wetness.

“Is this where you’re sore, huh?” your thighs were already parted enough for his fingers to disappear between them, finding your angry clit. 

“Yes…”

Tickling your dripping opening, he asked, “right here?” before, without issue, stuffing his thick fingers knuckle deep inside of you. 

“Oh my god, yes!”

© 2022 thyme-in-a-bubble 

[yunogf]

lmao i asked bc, as you said in your tags, there was a certain way that it comes across as with how you’re talking about it, so i genuinely wondered bc i was gonna listen to it as well. i’ve been reading plenty of comments about it as well that mostly just lean on “aoty” “soty” “best album ever” and i get that these are (hopefully) exaggerated claims by stans, but i was seriously yet to see a decent comment about its musicality. it’s either about his face in the mv or his voice or the aesthetic of the mv. nothing on the lyricism or the instrumentations or its creativity or depth, so i was hesitant. i get liking it, but i doubt its being “the best”, so when i saw that your comments were the same, i began to wonder if this is another case of exaggerated praises and it’s just... meh at best. nothing new and all that. i am still gonna listen to it on my own ofc but, i guess, since i’m not really his fan, i’m not all excited. amazing debuts usually create tractions of their own, and i don’t hear much for this, but i ain’t judging based on that ofc. anyway, no need to feel attacked. as i said, i was genuinely curious so i asked. i’m well aware that i have ears. i was just genuinely curious about what you actually thought about it, what with your unhinged tags and whatnot. that’s all.

hard to gain traction when ur company announces ur album 2 weeks before it drops!

i was thrown by your wording and i still kind of am but i don't listen to music i don't enjoy and that's across the board for any artist bc....why would i do that lol and maybe ur not in the right circle being a casual fan/non-fan bc I've seen most ppl talk abt the musicality along with everything else 🤔

ik u said u were genuinely asking and i appreciate the explanation but im picking up on an overall unimpressed tone ("hopefully exaggerated" "doubt it being the best" ?) and it feels like u've made up ur mind about jaehyun and his music and ur asking me to give u a reason to change ur mind/care/be impressed but that's not my job ur free to make ur own opinion to me it seems ur going in with a half formed one already but it's music so like it or leave it either way is okay! ur under no obligation!

I'm sorry if being a kpop stan (im assuming...?) has made u feel disillusioned by solo releases tho i understand bc ppl are often overhyped by fans but jaehyun is a music enjoyer who did his homework and worked with artists he himself is a fan of and the payoff is really good music

overall ur ask is very uninformed which if ur not a fan is understandable but as a native english speaker myself listening to an album that is almost entirely in english from a nonnative speaker i have to say the lyrics are very well done they make sense create good metaphor and aren't superficially about balling or making a lot of money (i loathe to hear this often in eng versions of kpop songs lol) and jaehyun is credited as a lyricist on almost every song afaik

the production value is solid "can't get you" has an entire band accompaniment (the trumpet >>>>>) he wrote/worked on "flamin hot lemon" with emotional oranges (one of my fave artists actually <3) so that one is Excellent in every regard esp for a song inspired by cheetos lmao I've said numerous times that none of the songs sound like they were created with the intent of 30 secs going viral on tiktok (a very important differentiation for me) and one of my favorites parts about the title track "smoke" is the outro it's soooo good there's an unexpected bit of piano that he adlibs along with >>>> and the ballad "completely" has a Gorgeous piano backing to it (the lyrics on this one are also so beautiful)

my excitement about the release may have overwhelmed me so i might not have broken down each song beat by beat but rest assured i'm not wasting time on music i don't enjoy

in summation the album is good and on a separate unrelated note he just happens to be really hot ❤️

[wen-kexing-apologist]

BL/QL Ask game : The Ugly, the Bad and the Worst

Alright, I was tagged in this game by @clara-maybe-ontheroad, so it's time to make some enemies.

Worst soundtrack / weirdest song choice in a BL

I don’t really pay the most attention to this, I can’t recall anything that sticks out to me as particularly egregious even if it may be a tad odd. Weirdest song choice though is Jojo and Ninew letting First sing in Only Friends. I love the boy but we all have our flaws and his is being horrifically out of tune.

Most cringe-inducing line (cute)

“Then I am gay too,” Bee from Between Us. A show that I did actually enjoy despite many people grumbling. I hold that it’s cause I didn’t wait three years for it, and didn’t know Until We Meet Again existed when I started watching it. But regardless, Bee and Prince had like 5 minutes of screen time, max and they won my motherfucking heart.

Most cringe-inducing line (actually bad)

Not a specific line, but literally any time that Nuea questions whether or not Hia Lian loves him in Cutie Pie 2 You. Bestie, you already agonized over that for far, far too long in Cutie Pie, by the time you ran out of the marriage proposal at your father in law’s birthday, I was already way past over the bullshit. And now you want to get back on the bullshit when you are planning your wedding? Come on…

Most stupid decision made by a character

I agree with @bengiyo, Teh giving up his spot in school for Oh. Honestly, you know what, looking even further back the stupidest decision was Oh and Teh’s friends coming up to Teh AT FOUR O’CLOCK IN THE MORNING THE DAY HE WAS GOING TO GO COMMIT TO COLLEGE TO TELL HIM OH WAS GIVING UP. Y’all couldn’t have fucking waited like…one day? You know Teh is stupid motherfucker prone to grand gestures.

Worst plot line

“I’m going to kill your mother from third hand cigarette smoke and spend the last hour and a half of a genuinely otherwise beautifully crafted show making the world’s longest anti-smoking campaign” by New Siwaj in My Only 12%. What a way to ruin a show at the very last minute.

The most problematic show you've watched

Fish Upon the Sky, what in the racism, support of stalking, invasion of privacy, manipulation was that show?

A show people love but you find bad

Enchante. I just hate Theo so goddamn much.

A show people find bad but you will defend

Also gonna agree with @bengiyo here and say Wedding Plan, I have seen so little conversation around that show since it aired and it was super adorable and very very outside of MAME’s typical taboos. Just fluff, lesbianism, and lavender marriages abound. But if you think La Pluie is bad, then I will fight you to an early grave.

A show that is just objectively bad but you enjoyed it

I wouldn’t say it is my favorite, but I didn’t mind Vice Versa, but maybe that’s cause I was paying attention to trying to predict the next episode’s colors and not to the plot?

A bad show that you kept watching because you were intrigued/fascinated

Mine is the same as @waitmyturtles. It’s currently still airing, so it’s entirely possible I drop it, but, Dangerous Romance, I am so mad at how quickly it is brushing past interesting topics, but I am still watching it because I am curious where they intend to go with it. I don’t think they can salvage it, but I need to know what it is they want to say that made them think handling this show the way they are is better than exploring literally any of the class questions presented in the first couple episodes.

A bad show that you kept watching because you were horny

I don’t really watch shows because I am horny,  I watch shows because- Why R U? FighterTutor, only reason I watched that show, I skipped through most of the rest of it.

A bad show that you kept watching because of that one character

Why R U? Because Fighter was such a compelling character and I thought Zee did a phenomenal job in the way he handled Fighter’s internalized homophobia. I wish they were giving Zee more complicated roles than Hia Lian because he’s a strong actor and I think his talent is wasted on Cutie Pie.

A bad show that you would still recommend

I don’t really recommend shows that I think are bad to people, so it is a case by case basis. I did not end up liking A Boss and a Babe, but I did recommend @emotionallychargedtowel watch at least some of it so she could get a better idea of Book’s acting ability.

The character that ruined a show the most

Nadia, My Ride. She’s such a self-entitled, incredibly judgemental bitch and I hate her, runner up is Toy for destroying Boss’ bookshelf.

Most awful character that you hated

Tawan, KinnPorsche. I hate him, I hate him, I hate him, I hate him. I was glad when he died, and I must commend Na for his performance because he did such a good job playing an asshole that I still hate his face when I see it.

Most awful character that you loved

Korn from KinnPorsche, I am obsessed with how casually evil he is, and how he keeps his loyalty through faked compassion rather than abusive fear the way Gun does. He’s consistently winning, even when his lies are revealed. I think he does a superb job of flying under the radar as a visibly awful character. But he’s a terrible person.

A character that wasn't awful but that you just don't like

Saifah, Why R U? It’s not his fault, but I just hate Jimmy’s face.

A hero that should have been a villain

Palm, Never Let Me Go, I had too many theories about the ways in which Palm could have betrayed Nuengdiao. Hell, I’d have settled for Chanon being a villain, but no, only loyalty :(

A morally bad character you're into

*ahem* *gestures to my username*

Wen Kexing, Word of Honor who has done nothing wrong in his entire life.

A morally bad character you're not into and you wish people would stop being into

Theo, Enchante, I hate that motherfucker with a burning passion. I know that I said I think Book should be able to play more assholes cause he’s doing a great job with Mew’s revenge era, but Theo was a goddamn fucking major asshole who was not really presented as such.

The show that disappointed you the most

Again, it’s not done yet, so there is still time to maybe climb out of this hole, but I am very disappointed by Dangerous Romance at the moment.

The Worst Show of Them All Because of Your Own Reasons

Enchante because how the fuck do you think it is okay to write a romance where one of the romantic interests both creates the most fucked up, convoluted lie to mess with your feelings, AND is so goddamn helpless that you GET FIRED FROM YOUR JOB FOR HELPING HIM, and not have either of those things be a wake up call or deal breaker?!

Tagging @ranchthoughts, @respectthepetty, @solitaryandwandering

[wfagamerants]

With my Jamboree hype still in full force, I decided to revisit both previous Switch Mario Parties as a refresher, with some 3, 6, Star Rush and Top 100 on the side to help with some things I wanted to compare.

Mario Party is one of my favorite series in anything and I have been vocal about my relationship with the Switch games being rocky. I was curious to see if the benefit of hindsight changed my views on them.

The answer is one No and one Yes, with some no sprinkled in.

Super Mario Party

This is the big one for me.

From the Hudson games, to the first five NDCube titles, I unironically enjoyed every previous entry, as is well known with all the cheerleading I do for 10 and Star Rush in particular and even Island Tour has some good stuff well worth experiencing.

With all that in mind, it probably comes as a surprise THIS is the one Mario Party I genuinely can’t stand and a revisit did not change my mind one bit.

Not like I didn’t try either, even with my enjoyment of the other NDCube games, of course I was excited to see the old formula back, but that only means so much when it doesn’t do it well and that’s what I really do think is the case here.

Going point by point, as I like to do, I wanna start with one thing I do find praiseworthy…despite not liking it that much, the character roster.

Mario Party usually doesn’t have much going on in terms big roster numbers, so to see one push so far is genuinely refreshing and they did need to put work into it, given the amount of characters that needed to be updated (Hammer Bro and Dry Bones) or never had a playable MP outing period (Pom Pom, Goomba, Monty) not even mentioning all examples here, that stuff is commendable.

I’m just personally not that big on the selection. Losing the Toads really hurts and I am generally more in favor of less mook centric rosters, even if I like all the ones on offer. Pom Pom to me, even as someone who loves the boss characters like the Koopalings, King Boo, Petey, King Bob-omb, etc, is just a really lame and unappealing character, no better than Boom Boom who at least had Strikers to make me warm up to him.

Bowser being playable is also iffy for me. I love the big guy, but taking him out of his usual role has some very drastic consequences in function and flavor, which I am very happy Jamboree is addressing, to give us the best of both worlds, but more on that later.

Objectively, this is a good roster, it’s just very not for me.

Another thing I find praiseworthy and do enjoy is the hub. Dropping regular main menus in favor of an interactive hub where you can walk around and chat with characters is a cute concept I want to return.

Once we get to the actual board gameplay though, the cracks start to show right away.

Everyone already complained about it, even when the game was new and generally praised, but yeah. 4 boards is an absolutely abysmal number and that could at least be salvageable if they were all good and fun to play on but….you already know where this is going.

I will say, I do love the themes. As much as I think the previous games did more with the NSMB tropes than they are given credit for, it’s great to go back to something more original again. They are cool themes, they are visually great, that stuff all works out.

Too bad they’re really bad boards.

It’s been talked about to death, but yeah, the boards are incredibly tiny and small boards don’t even need to be bad. DS had smaller boards and did such a good job with them you barely felt it, on top of to me, being a Top 5 Mario Party.

Not only are Super’s boards even smaller than the ones for the game that HAD to scale them back, but they are also very linear, with little in the way of interesting gimmicks or alternate routes.

You can call most MP boards, aside from deliberately linear ones like Pagoda Peak, basically big circles or squares. That’s fine, they are BOARDS after all, it’s more what you can do on them that matters and makes you not even notice that.

King Bob-omb’s Powderkeg mine feels like the closest to  an aversion to this and even it just amounts to choosing either the smaller circle or the larger circle, to run in circles in. There is simply nothing interesting going on and the events are too basic and lame to distract from it.

What doesn’t help is that Super made some changes to fundamental aspects of MP we take for granted and it really says a lot about how well thought out those elements were.

For one thing, the Dice has been reduced from a 1-10 to a 1-6. This was already a thing in 9 and 10, but in those games you were all in the same vehicle and progressed together, it was way more about wanting the best result out of your current situation. In Super, being a classic style MP again, it just makes progression feel fundamentally more sluggish, since cutting down the dice numbers so hard means you will go by nature, much slower and the odds of barely going anywhere are way higher.

There is also just the general lack of truly threatening obstacles on the boards. This especially shows with Bowser being playable. Gimmicks like him being on the board like MP1 and MP4’s Bowser’s Gnarly Party are off the table, as is him having his own board or game specific ideas like Bowser Time in MP7. Instead of Bowser Spaces we now have Bad Luck spaces.

They Suck. Really hard.

The penalties are just not threatening and the game feels rigged to prioritize the tamest one. The coin penalties barely hurt, losing an item is really not that big a deal here, the star moving is rarely anything but a non-punishment, etc. They do get a bit more punishing during the last 3 turns, but not only does that window give them little time to come into play, but even losing a star is less of a big deal than it would usually be, for one particular reason.

The economy in SMP is totally out of whack. 

Now second and third place also get coin rewards in minigames, which WAS a thing in 9 and 10 as well, but in those games that had more of a purpose, given the much more limited control during board play for everyone. In a classic Mario Party though, this already has implications and it only gets worse with other elements thrown in.

It just doesn’t feel that rewarding to be good at minigames,  because even if you play well, you may not even build up much of a lead, with Hidden Blocks, Hidden Block items and Lucky Spaces that can give coin rewards in abundance and ALL that is combined with how little everything costs.

Stars cost only 10 coins and combined with how small the boards are, getting to one rarely feels like a hassle. Even stealing a star only costs 30 coins and items are remarkably cheap and that’s on top of there being so few events that really threaten your coin count. King Bob-omb is really the only one that makes a real attempt there.

All of that results in really dull board play. More than ever the game really is all about the dice roll, with nothing from the board layout, to events, to the items, doing anything interesting to let you strategize or anything like that.

There’s also the small annoyance of them finding it necessary to give you needless tutorials and tips, like when you open the map or getting an item for the first time, which you can’t disable. 

On a final note for the board play are the allies and ally spaces, as well as custom dice, all taken from Star Rush. A lot of people dislike them, but I do find their implementation to be the most interesting thing on SMP’s boards. Supremely unbalanced, it needs another pass there, but I can see interesting potential for it in a MP with boards of more substance.

There is also Partner Party, which is essentially the Star Rush mode of the game and as Star Rush fan, I should love it.

Eh.

I appreciate the thought, but you can’t do free for alls, There are way fewer opportunities to get and especially steal allies and the boards continue to be void of anything interesting. Even just playing the 4 boards it had once each, with the minimum Turn count of 10, felt like a slog.

Then there are the minigames, which I often see praise for and honestly, they’re okay enough, but I do find the overall selection pretty meh.

It has genuine highlights, Slaperazi, Croozin’ For A Broozin’, Don’t Wake Wiggler and Fuzzy Flight School all being ones I really like for instance and I don’t hate the motion controls, I think they work fine.

It’s really not so much that there are a lot of bad minigames and more that it misses types I really like. There are no platforming minigames, no brawling minigames where you just punch and kick other players off of a platform, only one mashing minigame, etc. That’s on top of the fact that I feel a lot of the rumble minigames are really samey. There are like three separate minigames where you use the rumble to select the biggest/most of the thing you are meant to get.

There is also a general major sense of reduced player interactivity that plays into this and the most blatant example of it for me is comparing Hammer Drop from Mario Party 1 (and Superstars) to Super’s very own Lightning Round.

They are very similar coin minigames, but there is a major difference that sets them apart. While the hammers and lightning strikes both aren’t much of a threat, Hammer Drop lets you jump to swipe the incoming coins and coin bags, even jumping on opponents and hindering them or even ground pound opponents to hold them back. In Lightning Round, that interactive element doesn’t exist and everyone is just slowly running to the coins, while dodging total non-obstacles.

That example sums up a lot of why I find SMP’s minigame selection to be just not as interesting as the rest of the series and it also contributes to a stylistic difference I am not fond of at all.

I always loved Mario Party for being a more zany kind of Mario game, putting the characters in all kinds of wacky scenarios and to be fair, Super isn’t FULLY devoid of it. It’s still a rare time you see, say, Peach, helplessly chased by a giant Wiggler or Broozer army entirely as a gag at her expense one moment and then the next she pilots a big Sidestepper mech to whack Bowser with hammers with. That stuff is just awesome.

Super just has very little of it, due to the lack of interesting board gimmicks and action-heavy minigames and even what is there is heavily scaled back. Like characters just go into their dizzy animations when a Bob-omb blows up on them, rather than flying off-screen and said Sidestepper mech minigame just flings the characters away with a generic flail the game uses for almost every single negative event, as opposed to the other MPs which will just totally crush the character.

Is it pure flavor? Yeah, but I like flavor, flavor is good. MP just has a particular personality to it that Super doesn’t capture. It has plenty of personality in other areas, but it is missing a particular aspect I thought helped make the games really energetic, competitive and cartoonishly charming. It’s as if Mario took a page out of Wario’s playbook to be more wacky and I miss that.

Having said all that, one area the game does quite well in are the side modes. Champions Road is a perfectly functional ‘’Play all the Minigames’’ mode and Toad’s Rec Room hosts some minigames I honestly wish had regular play counterparts.

River Survival is decent, not something you can go back to much, but it’s a neat concept that at its hardest, does offer a challenge and its own minigames are pretty enjoyable for the most part.

Sound Stage meanwhile is the big star of Super as a whole for me. I love the rhythm minigame approach, there is a great energy to it, it’s got some lovely charm with all the dance animations for the cast (Waluigi’s moonwalk being the best, just sayin’), it’s just a good time. At most I wish I found the music more catchy, but it does its job at being fun to play along with.

I didn’t mean to be as negative as this likely came across, but it is just how it is. While it has some content I really like and ideas I think have potential, SMP on the whole I just do not like at all. It brought back the classic formula, while totally butchering it and it’s just all around lacking in so many things I like about the series. I went back to it to see if time and benefit of hindsight changed my mind and sadly no, if anything I have only grown to dislike it more.

Mario Party Superstars

By contrast, Superstars won me over on several things I was iffy on. I still have my gripes, but overall, I was pleasantly surprised.

One not pleasant surprise since the game came out, to start similarly to the Super section, is the roster. It’s small, it’s lame, we all know that. Of course character choice rarely affects anything in MP, but as I said, flavor is good and besides: When a series makes this much money and makes so heavy use of reused models, animations and voice clips across games, I do expect it to at least be able to compete with games that came out in the 2000s in terms of content in all places.

Speaking of which, this game is a bit funny to evaluate because it is all remakes of older content, but there is still plenty to talk about.

First there are the boards, five in total. Only one more than Super in terms of quantity, but they are all so much better than all of Super’s boards combined that they may as well be four boards more than Super had. That said a 6th board would have been appreciated, ideally they wouldn’t have just a N64 focus, but if they really wanna then at least give 3 a second board.

The board selection itself is quite pleasing. It has Horror Land so that alone is already a slam dunk, but there is a good quality level all around. The lack of a proper finale board is felt and I would have rather had a second MP3 board than two from MP1, simply because the former has much more interesting board design, but as it is, it’s fine.

Peach’s Birthday Cake made me roll my eyes when I saw it, but it turned out to be the most pleasant surprise of the whole game. The addition of items, a shortcut ramp and Bowser also doubling as a short-cut, if with a penalty, along with the lottery being moved, makes getting around and actually getting stars is far smoother and quicker. This also makes star stealing Piranha Plants far more of a threat, since there actually is something to steal now and that’s on top of there also being coin stealing Piranha Plants now.

This game turned what I thought was easily the worst Hudson era board and turned it into my second favorite one in this game. I am still stunned to this day and the improvements made to it show some really smart thinking that makes me optimistic for Jamboree’s new original boards.

The other boards haven’t seen any major changes and that’s perfectly fine. Playing Yoshi’s Tropical Island with items is a fun new experience though.

The actual board play has improved a lot, on top of playing on actually good boards, the coin distribution after minigames has been reworked to give the winner 10 coins again instead of only 8, with second and third only getting 2 and 3 respectively, making minigame wins far more of a benefit to build up a lead again. Stars are also back to the usual 20 coins and Bowser is back and as punishing as his spaces always are, so seeing harsh loses through that and the returning Chance Time brings back a ton of value to coins and stars that they largely lost in Super.

One new addition that’s consistent across all boards is Lucky Spaces, functioning the  same as in Super. The coin and item rewards you get from those can be really extreme and coupled with how many of these spaces there are, it gives the game a pretty chaotic feeling at times. For this particular game, I’m cool with it for this game, but ideally future games cool it a bit with these things.

There are also some nice QoL additions that once again, give me a lot of confidence for Jamboree. The generally increased game speed is a plus. Getting to choose between random Bonus Stars and the classic three is a feature that always should have been there. Getting to save up to 8 sessions, even online ones, is incredible and having the option to speed up board event scenes is a godsend for ones you may see many times in a row.

So yeah, the board game portion to me is a total hit in this game. The minigames are where I get more mixed. Not counting item minigames there are 100 in total and over half of those were already in Top 100. Not a bad thing by itself, but it does make some choices made bother me even more. Also not a fan of the N64 focus on the minigames as well, since it not only throws out a lot of good minigames, but it also screws over the GameCube and Wii & Wii U minigame packs, which would have been really cool options with a bigger selection.

Despite the latter gripe, I think the selection is….okay. It has it’s winners, particularly Hot Rope Jump and Dungeon Duos, but also some really notable stinkers like Spin Doctor, which wasn’t even in Top 100, so they deliberately picked that over something like Camp Ukiki or Apes of Wrath from the same game, genuinely bewildering. Duel Minigames in general really got the short end of the stick with only 5 in total and of all things, they pick stuff like Spin Doctor (which is at least okay) or Mass Meteor (one of MP6’s few stinkers).

Top 100 wasn’t perfect in that regard either, but I found its overall selection way more consistently solid and satisfying.That and bringing back certain minigames a third time just baffles me. Piranha’s Pursuit is a really bad minigame in all its incarnations, that can way too easily turn into a free win for the one player. It was a weird choice in Top 100, but bringing it back again in Superstars, without any changes for the better, really pushes it.

It’s still largely a good selection, it’s just easy to see the cracks when you have older versions to compare these games to and some did get butchered a bit. Tidal Toss’ hitboxes for the biggest waves not matching the visuals in particular being a NASTY example.

The characters also make far more grunts in many of the minigames and...yeah they can get pretty insufferable, especially with how small the pool of voice clips in this game is, compared to say, MP10, which had two minutes worth of clips for everyone.

There is also a case where the game still feels like holds back on bit on Mario Party’s old personality, with alterations to some minigames, for some examples:

You don’t see losing players bounce away in the lava anymore in Bumper Balls, they just vanish.

Several minigames replace more distinct damage poses with the generic flail, even if the more appropriate animation is elsewhere in Superstars.

The characters just lamely fall off the record in Dizzy Dancing, instead of crashing into the walls.

Squared Away lost it’s ending animation, which was already a thing in Top 100, the only time it took something like that away, but that had an excuse due to it using a generic minigame results screen like the other NDCube games did before.

Even taking the slapstick aside, replaying 3 in particular really revealed how many small things got cut for more generic animations. Hide and Sneak in particular has the characters just all do a heads down ducking pose, as opposed to the original where everyone had a distinct one, like DK adjusting his tie or Mario lying down.

Again, all this is flavor, but it sticks out even more when you are remaking content and if the roster is gonna be that small, going the extra mile on a few things would be appreciated.

It feels weird too, because the game oozes personality in so many other areas.

The title screens are all lovely.

The board ending pics and loser elimination sequences at the end of a round are very classic Mario Party.

The way characters literally pull out maps when you study the board map is amazing.

The dismayed reactions everyone has when landing on a Bowser space are great.

The Stickers are a fun evolution of taunts that can express way more.

Really, the game is full of great personality, it’s just in the minigames where some of the old charm they had gets weirdly sanded off.

Lastly there is online which is as functional as one could hope for. Has its hick-ups, but for Nintendo standards it’s fine. It’s not a disaster ala’ Mario Maker 2.

All nitpicking aside, this is a good game and a good Mario Party. I don’t think it’s one of the best ones, but the QoL additions and generally really solid board gameplay show the potential for it is there.

More than anything it feels like a testing ground to study the old board designs and test out things like the online, rather than something meant to be big on its own. I didn’t even touch on side content because there really is nothing to discuss.

Good game, but I was waiting for the next big thing and now it’s finally happening.

Super Mario Jamboree

My thoughts back here still apply and are very up to date, since we haven’t seen anything new since:

Playing the other two games again just really put into perspective how many things already got improved from one game to the next and it makes me all the more hopeful for Jamboree.

I have no doubt it will be the MP I have been waiting for all gen and I couldn’t be more excited~

[cherry-pop-elf]

I saw you say that you like Raver/Scenecore music, and it has me wondering if you have any thoughts for George and Fred (or even just the rest of the Weasleys too) for what sort of music they'd like?

Ooooo!!! Good ask good ask! I love music so much, and even studying piano right now! My final recital song is even Wizard Wheezes! ((My special interest is Weasleys, what can I say?)) So this is a super amazing and awesome ask! Thank you so much anon! I love love love love music!!!!!

Types Of Music The Weasley Siblings Listen To

William ‘Bill’

Bill is very much a Rock person. You’ll hear him listening to Ghost, Three Day Grace, My Chemical Romance, the classics like that. Just different types of Rock in general. Pop Rock, Rock and Roll, etc. Even go as far as to play an electric guitar. How did he manage to? I mean, magic. Who says you need to plug it in anywhere, when you can just produce magic itself to work it? Loves Alternative Rock Music. Favorite song? Gotta go with a classic like Mary On A Cross

Charlie

Of course he loves punk, and alternative, but he did mellow out a bit when he finally settled into his job. Playing softer music for the new born dragons made him come to love softer songs. Like jazz, country, and folk. So to kinda wrap it all together, he’s a Taylor Swift fan. He’s not a swiftie, but he does enjoy her music. He also loves to play guitar, many kinds, and even knows how to play the flute. Thanks to Hagrid. Playing the guitar, or flute, for the baby dragons is a passion time he wouldn’t trade for anything. Favorite song? 100% Taylor’s ‘No Body No Crime’ for sure

Percy

100% is the type to believe in the Mozart Theory. He listens to classical musics constantly. Such a nerd. Genuinely though, he does enjoy it. It helps him study and focus. So if you were to introduce him to the genre of lofi? He really would like it. Soft wordless music to play in the background, as he works. So he would be such a Stan for The Lofi Girl, if he was to say if he has a favorite anything

Fred And George

Big Band, Jazz, Swing, Techno Swing, they LOVE that high energy bop music. I mean, look at what their literal shops theme song is ((Fun fact, as I am writing this I am ACTUALLY playing Wizard Wheezes on the piano right now, for a recital!)) They gotta love that high energy music. Love it love it love it. Fred and George go nuts for Fully Dressed With Out A Smile. They also will break into Anything You Can Do I Can Do Better if given the chance. They especially loved singing that with Ginny, while growing up

Ron

He was invested in Rock, of course. The side effects of being a younger sibling to a big family, but Hermione helped him explore other interests as well. Helped him be more brave in what he liked. He does love Rock styles, but Pop Rock was more his branch. Pop just has a more fun energy to it. Different from his day to day life. Helps him stand out a little as well, since Bill is more into the alternative/emo/goth aesthetic types or Rock. One Republics ‘Run’ speaks to him a lot. Don’t tell anyone I told you this, but he also really likes Sk8ter Boy. Because it makes him think of Hermione. Shhhhh

Ginny

Musicals. She just can’t pick a genere. Growing up with six brothers gave her a love of different types of music. So if you ask her what she likes, she will say musicals. Musicals have so many types and moods. It’s perfect for whenever you don’t know what to listen do. In a romantic mood? High energy? Even depressive gothic? There’s a musical for it. She’s learned to keep her mind open, and invest in different interests. Her favorite song really depends on the mood she’s in, or vibe. But if you had to twist her arm, it’s gonna be that classic Merry Poppins Step In Time. It reminds her of her brothers, whenever they had to do spring cleaning together. If she’s sad, that song will ALWAYS make her feel better. If not? Clearly a imposter!

Bonus: Belladonna

Fun fact about me! I am currently learning piano! I just love music so much. Piano is also good for me health wise, because I have dexterity issues because of my muscle spasms. I’m practicing a recital song, and it’s Wizard Wheezes. Which I’ll perform as my final. I hope to post it on tumblr in the future. As for music I like? Scene/Ravecore and Techno Swing. I guess I just love high energy songs with electric vibes. Ironic, given I have chronic fatigue. Along with, ya know, trapped in a wheelchair. Slay. Thank you again anon! I love music so much, and I am forever grateful I have hearing to enjoy it. A really great ask!!!

[winxanity-ii]

❀ ° • • • ╮ 𝖂𝖊𝖑𝖈𝖔𝖒𝖊 ╰ • • • ° ❀

18+ 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐤(𝐬) | 𝐌𝐢𝐧𝐨𝐫𝐬 𝐃𝐨 𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭

The name's Xani, and welcome to my blog where i push out all the delusional scenarios/stories—both sfw and nsfw—my maladaptive daydreams like to stir up...

i'm not really sure how this goes, but if you guys have an idea you'd like to see written, send it, and hopefully my delusions will work in overdrive to complete them...

um, what else? i guess all i can say is don't hold back! though i may be new to this posting stuff, i've had my fair share of experiences, so whatever you think of, i most likely dabbled in it...

and if i do a good enough job on something and have more spunk in the gunk, i'll do my best to do a continuation on whatever...

also, don't be afraid to reblog/like either! it let's me know i'm doing a good job (not that i like being praised or anything hahahah, unless 👀)

i guess that's all. bye!

FANDOMS I WRITE FOR **

Recent Fic: 𝐈 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞, 𝐑𝐨𝐛𝐨𝐭 ~ Install 5 | 🇨‌🇭‌🇦‌🇵‌🇹‌🇪‌🇷‌ 🇮‌🇳‌🇩‌🇪‌🇽 | Yandere!Andy x Fem!Reader / Alien!AU

Top 6 Recent One-shots:

I Can't Hear You! 🔞 | cheercaptain!gojo / college!au

Like What You See?🔞 | fashion designer!gojo / model!au

Helping Hand | yuji / college!AU

Game Over 🔞 | gamer boyfriend!gojo / non-sorcerer!au

Washed Up | odysseus / epic: the muscial!AU

In The Silence | inumaki / college!au

**Please note that this blog is intended for audiences aged 18 years and above, minors DNI. Here, you'll find a mix of both safe-for-work (SFW), not safe-for-work (NSFW), and dark content.

And just a friendly reminder, if you prefer not to see certain types of content or are under 18, it's best not to proceed further. While I cannot fully control who accesses my work, if you so happen to be a minor who ignores this warning, and honestly, can't shame 'cuz I did the same when I was younger💀 I encourage you to read at your own discretion.

PLEASE READ BELOW BEFORE REQUESTING:

NOTE: I do NOT have a set writing-schedule! This is just a space for me to dump my self-insert writings, but feel free to ask questions/leave comments, they make my day 😊❤️❤️....

Also, I will NOT be responding to malicious Anonymous/Anon asks or posts; if you do, you will receive 1 reminder of this before getting ignored. It's nothing personal—I just prefer to respond to someone whose intentions are to criticism/expect me to change to their desires. If you have genuine questions, thoughts, or feedback, please reach out so we can have a real conversation, as well as get your questions fully answered and see more about what my mind is coming up with!

If not all, the majority of my work(s) will be written with the heavy intentions of poc!reader/black!reader but can be read by any ethnicities/races. Also, please understand that anything I write is solely for my enjoyment—if anything, you guys are just tagging along witnessing my delusions come to life in real-time; if you don’t like what I create, scram and make your own…like I did 😁

P.S. The quickest and swiftest way to get blocked is by telling me what I need to do in my writing(s)... like, be for real 😐

Also, and I can't possibly stress this enough, please refrain from stealing/plagiarizing ANY of my works! I am passionate about sharing my creations on this platform, but I must emphasize that I am the sole legal owner and author of any of my works posted. Any unauthorized use or plagiarism of my work will result in immediate takedown and legal action taken. Respect for copyright is essential to maintain the integrity of my original storyline and the characters within, and if not, I have zero-problems with taking them down indefinitely! Enjoy~😊

Key: xani-writes: (works/fics) xani-rants: (random thought) xani-responds: (usually responses to asks/etc.) xani-navi: (my master lists/etc)

𝐚𝐥𝐭 𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: lulu-4-u | Lusion

[aemehhh]

Heya! I don’t usually wrote requests so sorry if I come off as awkward😅 I was wondering if you could write a small thing about gorino being with someone who’s insecure about their height

I’m 5’10 and sometimes I just feel down about it Yknow? I don’t feel desirable because guys prefer short girls or whatever, if this is to much you can completely ignore this. I do really enjoy your work btw<33

YAY!! I got my first ever request!!! :D

It's definitely not too much to ask, I think this is an amazing request! I had to ask some of my tall girlie friends about their experiences, because I am on the opposite end of the height-spectrum 💀 This is also a little rushed, so I'm sorry if it doesn't meet your expectations!

Also, I am so sorry I took so long to write the request! I hope you had a wonderful start to the new year!

Little message to the Readers in general; I just want everybody to know, you're absolutely gorgeous, no matter your height!!!

Giorno is ~20 and Reader and him are engaged, so it's an established relationship :3

Giorno with a tall! fem! Reader

Wc: 905, a short lil thing!

———————————————————————

This day was genuine ass. You went shopping with you friend and genuinely couldn't find a single piece of clothing that looked good or that fit right. Jeans that looked perfect on your shorter friend were way above your ankle on yourself and the long-sleeved shirts you tried, since winter is approaching, just looked so weird on you. You didn't even attempt to look for shoes, instead you told your friend you were going home because of an "emergency".

And there you were, sitting on your bed, cuddled up in a blanket and reading a book in order to distract you from the loud voice of insecurity that rang in the back of your head. Turns out the book wasn't helping, though.

It was a regular romance book, sappy as shit and a slow-burn. Usually you ate these up like crazy, but the main character was described as a short, beautiful woman. There it was again; having to lean up on your tip-toes to kiss your partner, your partner looking down at you, all those things that were considered super cutesy and desirable. You weren't that. You threw the book on the bedside table with a mad huff, throwing your blanket over your head.

Fuck, no, you're literally taller than your beautiful, angel of a fiancé. You lean down slightly when you kiss him, and you don't have to stand on your tip-toes in order to hug him. You just knew the nonnas on the streets send judging looks your way when they see you two holding hands.

Speaking of your fiancé, he entered your shared bedroom, seemingly home from whatever job he had today. You were aware Giorno most-likely already knew you didn't buy anything today; you've seen his subordinate follow you around the whole time. To be frank, you kinda signed up for constant supervision when you started dating the Don of Passione.

"Cara mia, are you alright?" Giorno spoke softly, he always does so with you. His voice held the upmost adoration for you; a tone nobody got to hear, but you. He knelt down on the floor by your bedside and lifted your blanket slightly to look at you. His beautiful, bright eyes met yours as he took your hand into his.

"Just a bad day, don't mind me, my love." You spoke and sat up. You felt Giorno's hand grasp yours just a tad tighter.

"I do mind, though. Something is bothering you, I can see that clear as day. Alessandro told me you didn't get yourself anything today either. What's the matter, amore? Please let me know so I can take some of the burden off of your heart." Giorno reached up and put his hand on your cheek oh-so gently. His touch was full of love, as usual.

You averted your gaze to your sheets. You felt stupid for thinking the way you do. You know all too well that Giorno loves you more than anything in this world, but you don't feel as desirable as other women. They would look so much better by his side, so why did he choose you?

You were silent for a little while, but then you started to feel guilty. Not telling him would make him feel as though you didn't trust him, which you did. So, you took a deep breath and told him everything. You spoke about your shopping trip; how it made you insecure about your height again and then about how your book made it worse. All in all, your head really wasn't up in the clouds and by the end, you almost had tears pricking in the corner of your eyes, which you tried masking by blinking a lot and looking at the ceiling.

Giorno noticed, of course. He stroked your cheek gently and pressed a kiss to the back of your hand before he spoke again.

"Amore, you're the most beautiful woman that has walked this earth. I do not care about your height in the slightest. I love you more than I have ever loved anything ever before. If these measly, cheap stores do not carry clothes appropriate for you, I will hire the designers personally to tailor the perfect clothing for you. If someone looks at you the wrong way, consider them dead tomorrow. There is nothing that would stop me from making sure you're comfortable and happy. You're the light of my life, the ray of sunshine in the early mornings of a beautiful summer day and I wish, I so wish you would see yourself in the way that I see you. You're perfect to me in every way, my love. Just seeing you smile makes my heart fill with so much joy, I wish to scream it out to the whole world. Sono pazzo di te, tesoro." Giorno's voice was filled with sincerity as he put a hand to your chin, gently tilting your head to face his eyes again. He then smiled and gave you a gentle peck on the lips before getting on the bed on top of you to hug you tightly.

Giorno's words made you smile as you returned his embrace, croaking out a quiet "I love you" before burying your head in the juncture between his neck and shoulder.

In a world that doesn't see your worth, Giorno worships the very ground you walk on. He vows to do so until the day he dies.

[addictedtostorytelling]

i’ve been rewatching csi from the beginning (because i’ve never been able to make it past season 9 without grissom) and i’m finally up to the end of season 7… i have like 3 episodes left and i’m SAD. this team dynamic is so special to me and i feel this slow crawl of devastation that i’m (again) witnessing the end of what has been for 7 seasons. soon sara won’t be her usually cute and passionate self (in love too) that we get see in season 7, and she’ll leave, and then warrick is going to die, and grissom will leave… and nothing will ever be the same on this show. i don’t know how to get over it. how did you do it? how do i move on? how do i mourn this team dynamic that i’ve loved for so long and get used to new variations of the team? god, i wish grissom came back for a proper full ep earlier than the freaking series finale and the new show. i’m just… not sure how to enjoy without them all 😭

hi, anon!

yours is a very heartfelt question, and, unfortunately, i am probably the wrong person to answer it, because i never really "got over" the changes to the show post-s7, either.

not gonna lie to you: i have only watched the s10-s15 era of the show once through in its entirety.

the s8 and s9 angst i can deal with in order to get to the happy gsr ending in episode 09x10 "one to go." however, i hate all later seasons of the show beyond that point with all the salt that is in me, not only because of the cast turnover but also because the writing and production values of the show changed so much as to make the series (and the remaining characters) unrecognizable.

most of the time, i just straight-up ignore the fact that those seasons exist, preferring to imagine my own canon-divergent au version of the show (starting from the end of s7) instead.

i really do not engage with them unless someone sends me an ask.

that so, i can't exactly tell you how to learn to accept the new team or get comfortable in that altered narrative landscape. i never did, on either count.

instead, my advice is this: keep in mind you're not obligated to finish watching csi if doing so isn't enjoyable to you. you fell in love with a particular group of characters, story universe, and cast dynamic, and if those things went away or ship of theseus'd themselves into a production that is fundamentally different from the one you fell in love with in every way save name, you don't have to stick around anymore.

remember: you're watching this show as a hobby, not a job.

the #1 rule of fandom is to follow your bliss, so if you're not naturally motivated to finish the series—and especially if the thought of doing so is actively causing you dread—then you don't have to force the issue.

give yourself permission to say, "for me, the series ends with episode 08x01 'dead doll' or episode 09x10 'one to go' (or wherever you want to draw your line in the sand)" and then walk away.

if you need closure, write your own au version of what happens after that point or else find some fanfic author whose vision aligns with your own. keep living blissfully in your s1-s7 happy place with the original team graveyard, where grissom is the boss and sara stays in vegas and warrick doesn't die and they all keep solving cases together until retirement.

and then don't sweat it.

you're not being a "bad fan" or letting anyone down, and there's still plenty of material in the early seasons for you to engage with.

now.

if you absolutely feel you must finish the show (for whatever reason), i guess one thing i might suggest is to engage with work from fans who genuinely enjoy the later seasons. i know there are some folks in this fandom who adore the new characters and team graveyard version 2.0. they write meta and fic and make gifsets about it, and they have a total blast doing so. hanging around their blogs might help you to find things to appreciate.

another thing you might do is give yourself permission to "cherry-pick." watch just to see what happens. if there's stuff you like, go ahead and incorporate it into your conception of the show. the rest, discard. as i said above, you're not obligated to enjoy the show in a certain way and especially not "across the board." so if you like the fact sara has mother-in-law drama but hate the fact she gets divorced? then keep the first thing and toss out the second. if canon makes a stupid-ass decision, you can elect to ignore it.

and regardless of whether you ultimately decide to finish out your watch-through or not, don't forget: the beginning of the story—i.e., those seven golden seasons you so love—will always be there, and you can return to them as often as you want. the beauty of a story is that it exists in perpetuity. grissom, catherine, warrick, nick, sara, and greg will all still be there waiting for you, and you can continue to enjoy their dynamics however you best prefer them.

good luck, anon! if you choose to continue your watch, i hope you enjoy yourself. if not, then i hope you have fun mentally setting up shop in the early seasons.

i certainly do!

thanks for the question! please feel welcome to send another any time.

[itisnotdefended]

lunch is weird when your dad's a therapist.

I had lunch with my dad today. We have lunch now; 17 year-old me would absolutely balk at the notion, but there you have it. Guess what? I like it. I genuinely enjoy going and grabbing a bite to eat with my dad. We talk about our pasts and childhoods - which might seem strange considering he was there for mine. But was he? 

Anyway.

There was a mission behind today’s lunch: there needed to be a discussion about purity culture. I needed to know where my dad was at with it after I’ve battled my way out of a virginity shaped hole in my brain and finally grasped on to some semblance of autonomy and agency in my own life. Turns out? He’s in a much better place now than I could have even hoped. Great news.

However.

Somehow, this segued into me talking about my assault. Odd, out of the blue, and intimate considering we were both choking down burnt ends in a booth at Famous Dave’s. But I am nothing if not obliging, so we spoke about it. I brought up the aftermath; how I had felt split from myself, fully dissociated, seeing myself in the third person. I hadn’t been in control of my words or actions, simultaneously not existing but also running on co-piloting software I didn’t know was installed. When I confessed that I wouldn’t be surprised if I hosted a whole person in my head as a result of a week’s worth of dissociation, he looked at me levelly and said, “I wouldn’t be surprised, either.”

What? Wha- how cou… wow. It kinda took the wind out of my sails a little bit, not gonna lie. I had been jokingly alluding to DID and he just swooped in and validated the sneaky genuine thoughts that had been hiding behind my charade. We had an authentic conversation about my experience wherein he continued to validate my theory that I may have "split a bit." He also encouraged me to write to her. She saved my life when I was going through trauma. I owe her a letter at least.

Dear Protector,

I don’t really remember you, but I remember what happened before you were around. I can’t even say much about that. Sometimes I think about that time and I feel nothing but sadness and grief. I hurt a lot and I remember trying to capture that hurt. I didn’t know how. Looking back, I don’t think I was ever meant to capture the hurt. Why should I have tried so hard to save what you worked so hard for me to not know?

You kept a lot of people at bay, you pushed people away. I look back on that week with you and I realize that may have been the only week when I was completely devoid of all programming. In a strange and roundabout way, you gave me freedom from the cage that had been built around my mind and behaviors. I said what I thought and didn’t mince words, I didn’t tiptoe to protect everyone else because I was the one in need of protecting. Do you still come around? Would you? Not in the same way, I don’t want you to have to work. I would just like for you to drop by, tickle the front of my brain, say hi. I think I pushed you away too hard, but I was scared. I want to be grateful more than scared.

Your work that week saved my life. You did your job so well, my darling, my unruly heart. Thank you for being my shield and my crutch.

Love,

Laura