#dont expect things like these often i just need to draw thoughts sometimes

[arunneronthird]

self portrait of a comic fan in the morning

[srjlvr]

WHAT’s IN MY BAG ?!

what would ENHA members put in their bag that reminds them of you.

idol-ot7!enha x nonidol-fem!reader | genre fluff | warnings none (lmk if i missed smth) | not proofread ! | ✎ ᝰ (‘a note from jo’) . don’t even ask me how i thought about it bc i honestly dont know

희승 <> heeseung

he’d probably go around with your beauty products like hand creams and such.

it’s the ones you always use and even asked heeseung to buy them for you a few times when you ran out of it.

you sometimes happen to forget them when you two are going out—no worries!! heeseung is always here to rescue.

“what’s your favorite thing you keep in your bag?” the interviewer asks. heeseung looks through his bag and smiles when he sees something that reminds him of you, he takes it out and chuckles, “y/n always uses them, i thought it’d be good if i keep them since she always forgets them when we go out”

제이 <> jay

he’d definitely carry your perfume in his bag. he bought it to you once as a gift and ever since then it became your favorite perfume ever.

sometimes when you’re far from each other, he’d put on your perfume he carries around just because he misses you.

always buys extras and gives them to you but leaves one in his bag just incase he rans out of it and isn’t able to buy more at the moment.

“what’s the most expensive thing in your bag?” the interviewer asks, clearly making them to show off. jay immediately takes out your perfume and grins, “i bought it for y/n as a gift, but i didn’t expect her to like it as much as she does now, so i buy it more often now and it’s somehow the most expensive one”

“i use it a lot, i always think about y/n when i do” he smiles and nods, the members all sniffing him and giggling.

제이크 <> jake

before the two of you got together, you made him a heart shaped paper with a cute drawing on it.

he’d definitely carry that around, even if it looks old and wrinkled, he loves it.

always shows it to people since he adores it so much and wants to show off about how amazing you are.

“what’s the thing you’d never agree to give away?” the interviewer asks. jake, without a doubt takes out the heart shaped old and wrinkled paper with a big smile on his face, “y/n made it for me before we started dating, at that moment i knew i had to do everything to make her mine”

성훈 <> sunghoon

sunghoon loves taking pictures. he especially likes taking polaroid pictures with you, and of you alone.

he’d go around with a little album of your polaroids together, there’s nothing he loves more than looking through those pictures whenever you two are far away from each other.

would take it ANYWHERE he goes, and always adds new polaroids when he gets the time to take new pictures.

“what’s one thing you’d never get rid off?” the interviewer asks. sunghoon takes out the little album and smiles as he shows a few pictures of the two of you together, “it’s me and y/n in those pictures, i have this album for over a year and we’re always taking new pictures, i always look at them whenever i miss her”

the poor boy blushes and covers his face, the rest are busy pouting, “it’s the fact that he doesn’t even have pictures with us in his bag that saddens us”

선우 <> sunoo

gahhh i feel like he’d definitely carry around hair products in his bag—such as hairpins and hair ties.

he loves loves LOVES styling your hair, and always has an emergency hairpins and hair ties just incase.

your hairpin broke? sunoo’s here to fix it for you. your hair tie is not holding enough? sunoo’s. here. to. fix. that.

“what’s a thing you rarely use but still have it?” the interviewer asks. sunoo knows the answer right away and takes out the hairpins and hair ties with a giggle, “i use it on y/n mostly since i can’t really style my hair with these, but she needs them a lot so i carry it around”

정원 <> jungwon

the amount of wireless earbuds that you lost is insane. jungwon, being the responsible he is—still uses his first earbuds ever.

when you bought a new pair, jungwon decided to buy an extra one. he puts it in his bag and carries it around in case you’d come up to him and tell him you lost it again.

lost a pair again? jungwon pulls out the extra he bought you last time, and would probably buy an extra one again since he can’t trust you on this one. would he mind? no, not at all.

“what’s a thing you actually have twice of it?” the interviewer asks. jungwon laughs as soon as he hears the question, taking out the earbuds he bought recently, “i have my own earbuds, and these one are extra for y/n, she keeps loosing her earbuds all the time so i keep extras in my bag for her”

“it’s quite expensive isn’t it?” the interviewer asks and jungwon nods, “but i don’t mind since it always reminds me of her”

니키 <> ni-ki

both ni-ki and you LOVE sunglasses. you even bought matching ones once! ni-ki would probably carry one of your favorite sunglasses in his bag.

you have your own that you love and usually wear, but the one ni-ki carries is your most expensive and favorite one.

as much as he loves his own sunglasses, he’d wear yours whenever he misses you a lot, that way he can feel your embrace next to him, even if you’re not physically by his side.

“what’s your favorite accessory in your bag?” the interviewer asks. ni-ki smiles and slowly takes out your sunglasses, “it actually belongs to y/n, but i took it. we both love sunglasses and we bought matching ones, but since these are her favorites i carry them around and wear them all the time”

••• copyright © srjlvr all rights are reserved.

[genderless-naper]

candle shopping

trafalgar law x strawhat!reader

smut! a lil ooc rough law hehe

nsfw, wc: 3.4k, lowercase intended !

a boring day on the sunny draws law to go ‘candle shopping’ from your personal collection. it accidentally escalates to something deeper than meant to be

being stuck on a ship in the middle of the ocean with the strawhats was not the most ideal for law. they were loud, obnoxious, and have no concept of personal space. law would often find himself locked away in rooms to find some peace and quite from the hectic crew.

the only strawhat he could bear being around was you. you had the personality to match with the others humors, buy he would find a completely different side whenever he found himself on the deck at night starring at you while you rambled about how endless the sea was. he could have spent the time lost away in books, but in reality he didnt mind exchanging his time with you. that was more than he could say about any of the strawhats.

law knew something was wrong with him when he looked forward to seeing you during breakfast. the way you appeared in his view made made his mind generate hundreds of thoughts at once. sometimes he would curse himself and avoid looking at you all together. this tactic didnt last long since you were always asking him something.

“hey law do you need any sugar for your coffee?” you held out the small container with sugar cubes

he never added sugar in his coffee, but how could he resist when you asked him so earnestly? how could he say no when you made the effort to think about him?

he took two and added them to his cup as he watched you make jokes with luffy about eating sea monsters for lunch. he was starring at you again before he realized it.

you on the other hand were no stranger to how the surgeon was the slightest bit friendlier to you. he didnt immediately leave when you approached him like when others did. hell, he actually made an effort to converse with you when you said something.

during one uneventful afternoon laying on the lawn you decided to check on your friends to see if they were doing anything interesting. you found luffy, usopp, and chopper fishing at the side of the sunny. their activity seemed more boredom-inducing than yours. you found zoro doing his usual 2000 pushups which were apart of his training routine. you found sanji prepping vegetables for his next meal. you saw nami and robin enjoying the weather laying on chairs on the deck. you found brook cleaning his violin while being told an ailen story by franky. everyones activities just seemed uneventful. you thought of your next stop on your checking-in-with-friends train.

knowing where to find the last subject, you headed to the library of the sunny. you found law nose-deep in some mundane book.

“he’s probably the most uninteresting person to check up on.” you thought to yourself. law heard the door open. he simply didn’t care enough to look up to know who entered, or give a thought of acknowledgment when the unknown person approached him. he only withdraws from his book when you sit next to him asking how his day was. you rambled on about how bored you were and how the crew had nothing fun to do.

at this point law would usually get up and go somewhere else secluded to finish his book. he wanted to, but something was holding him back. maybe it was the way you talked, or the way your hair fell perfectly over your shoulders, or how your confidence radiated when you held his eye contact. he would never admit how he would give anything just to hear you say his name on a loop. it made him feel special.

and yet he pushed those feelings deep into his abyss when he replied, trying to sound as cold as possible, “i honestly dont care. im busy so leave me alone” law was expecting you to be offended or leave. the last thing he thought he would hear was you bursting into laughter.

“did i say something embarrassing?” he thought to himself trying to retrace his words exactly.

you shook your head and tossed his book to the side while replying,

“all this reading has made you become the most boring person on this ship! who cares about some variant-strand of a virus whose last infection was recorded 200 years ago?” he kept a cool expression on his face.

you were desperate to find something entertaining to do. realizing how dimly lit the library could be you thought back to your candle stash you kept which had varieties of scents.

“hey, do you like candles?” you asked the raven haired man.

law raised an eyebrow suspiciously, “candles? why would you ask that?”

you lit up finally finding an activity to pass the time with. you grabbed his hand and pulled him to the girls cabin, “lets take you candle shopping!”

this was laws first time entering the girls cabin of the ship. he never had a reason to. he was quite surprised to see how much more spacious, cleaner, and taken care of it was compared to the boys. your bed was made, and it looked like heaven to the heavily sleepy-induced doctor who constantly disregarded his insomniac habits.

you rummaged under your bed and pulled out a bag with different colors and sizes of candles. you put the bag on your bed and pulled out candles one by one.

law stared in an utter state of confusion. you popped the top off of one and handed it to him, “smell this and see if you like it”

at first the doctor quietly refused, trying to hand the candle back so he could go back to reading. you huffed and dragged him to sit on your bed, “if youre gonna coop yourself in that library all day like a chicken you might as well take a candle with you. its so dimly lit i dont get how you can read at night. now find one that you like! dont worry i wont charge you.” you winked playfully at the doctor

law fought the blood threatening to rise to his cheeks. he gave up and started ‘candle shopping’ through your pile. he smelt some that were vanilla heavy, fruit heavy, lavender heavy, tobacco heavy (he hated that one specifically), and more. they all left him feeling unimpressed.

you thought for what the man sitting next to you would enjoy. you grabbed another candle that was a shade of deep green. you read the label and handed it to him. “this one has notes of deep forest, sandalwood, and fresh spring water.” law smelt it not expecting much.

he was pleasantly surprised to find how he actually liked this scent. you were excited to see if he found a candle that fit his interests, “do you like that one? should i light it for you??”

he saw at your excitement radiating off of you. how could he say no when you went to the extent to find him something he liked? how could he say no when you cared this much about him? he silently handed the candle back.

you cleared away the other rejected candles and got off your bed. you ordered law to lay down as you lit the candle carefully, “you need to relax to be able to fully enjoy the energy it offers! try to get comfortable.”

he was astonished at your directness, “you want me to.. lay down on your bed? it’s made and ill just get it messy.”

you shook your head and pushed him to lay down. you carefully placed the candle on the floor right next to the bed, “close your eyes and really try to relax trafalgar”

he felt a warm sensation spread in his stomach when you said his name. he was left with no choice but to close his eyes. the scent of the wax filled the room gradually. it wasn’t a scent that was overpowering. he could still smell you on your sheets with the candle’s notes lingering in the background.

you stay quite as you watched the once stoic man fade into a state of relaxation. you were feeling proud of your succession.

law heard footsteps starting to approach the door of the cabin followed by laughter of the other two female members. his once relaxed state quickly washed away not wanting to be caught. he wasn’t just in the girls cabin. he was in your bed. who knows what the strawhats would think of him? he gave you a look of alarm.

as the cabin knob twisted you quickly jumped into bed and pulled the covers up. you were on your side with your back facing the door trying your best to conceal the tattooed man. your legs were practically tangled with each other. mere centimeters was the distance between your faces. you shushed him quietly and pushed him slightly lower while hiding his hat under your bed.

the door opened as the two females walked in. nami saw you in bed and wondered what was wrong, “hey y/n is everything okay?”

nico robin hummed, “its not like you to be in bed in the middle of the day”

you faked a cough trying to convince them of you feeling unwell, “i just wanted to lay down for a bit.”

nami replies, “if you want me to ask sanji to make you something then let me know”

you okay’d a response back to her.

law wish he activated his powers before becoming stuck in this predicament. he wished he never got sucked into your side quest. he wish he could be able to say no to you. maybe then he wouldn’t have been stuck hiding in bed with you. his hand was naturally placed on your waist as you had left your hand in his hair after trying to push him down. the position was dangerous for him. he looked up at you while you flashed apologetic looks.

you finally noticed your hand slightly tangled in his hair. you tried to move it to make the position less awkward. moving it a few centimeters before opting to return it to its original position to avoid attention being drawn to you. the feeling of your fingers trying to move yet returning back to him made his mind blank out. his eyes turned half lidded as the forestry scent made him slightly sink into you. dangerously closer than ever.

you took in every feature of the man right before you. you quietly moved your thumb from the roots of his hair to trace his facial features softly. you dont know what came over you. you ran your thumb lightly across his eyebrow, his nose bridge, then cheek bone, and finally to his lip. you hesitate, resting your thumb on his lower lip, not daring to move it any further.

laws gaze had changed from its previous cold appearance. he looked different from before, as if he wanted you to continue. he needed you to admire his features just like how he admired yours every moment he saw you. both your desperations climbed in attempt to keep quiet. his hold on your waist pulled you ever so slightly closer to him. enough hoping you wouldn’t notice. you continued to slowly trace his lower lip, pulling down on it slightly to see how far he would really let you take it.

he shot you a dangerously possessive gaze. it was his turn to return the act. he slowly ran his once resting hand down your waist and down your thigh. your curves fitting perfectly in his hand. he gripped your thigh slightly, which earned a surprised gasp from you.

nami looked back over, completely oblivious to the unsuspecting man in bed with you, “are you sure you’re okay y/n..?”

you responded quicker than you liked to admit, trying to hide the panic in your voice, “im fine really! just a bit of a headache i guess. ill be fine once i take a nap.” you glanced back down at the raven-haired man who pressed a ghosting kiss against your thumb.

you felt your heart skip a beat as your body’s heat started to rise. you couldn’t believe how daring he’s trying to show you he could be. any moment other than now would’ve been better to see.

you try to move your legs to untangle them from the man in front of you. you bit your lip as you felt your thigh brush harshly against law in between his legs. you freeze while you feel him harden slightly, member pressing back onto your thigh.

law tried his best for fight these sensations, but it was difficult when all you did was light his body on fire every time you moved. the warm sensation in his stomach from earlier growing into a blaze. he mouthed words at you carefully quiet, ‘don’t move’

you smirk once you realize the position you were in. you were towering over law as he looks at you with eyes which showed slight desperation. you kept tracing his lower lip as you continued to push your thigh against his growing member. you wanted to be the sole reason he fought to make any noise in that moment.

law cursed you silently in his head. he gripped your thigh, digging his fingertips into your skin. he shot you a now threatening look. knowing what you were doing and how you deliberately were doing it to get a kick out of him drove him insane.

he could easily take control of the power dynamic now in place if it hadn’t been for the women still in the room. he fought a growl as you trailed your hand from his lip to the collar of his shirt. playing with it innocently while devilishly tormenting the man with your thigh drove you to feel your stomach blaze as well.

the two women bid their farewells as they left the cabin shutting the door behind them. you felt a sense of relief wash over you, but were pulled back into reality when law grabs your ass while slightly grinding himself on your thigh to feel some relief.

he spoke words of venom to you, “you’re gonna regret this y/n..”

you tilt his chin up to you, reminding him of the power dynamic still in place, “who says i don’t want this?” your words sweet like honey.

law looks back at the door to make sure no more disturbances would bother his current moment with you. he flipped you onto your back and towered over you. hands between your head to support himself.

he leaned down to your ear and spoke while smirking, “now its my turn to see how quiet you can be”

your eyes widen once you see the position you were in. the blaze in your body abandon any rational thinking you had at that moment. you pulled the man down into a sloppy kiss as you tug up on his shirt desperately trying to expose his body.

he pulled the shirt off mid kiss then worked on taking this belt off. you whined for him to hurry while the desperate between your legs painstakingly grew with each passing second. you both pushed the rest of your clothes off in an attempt to not waste anymore time.

law grabbed his member with a slight groan, “look at what you did to me y/n..”

you couldnt help but feel proud of being able to draw this side of law out. not too long ago he was a mysterious identity on the ship. now he was just mere seconds away from fucking your mind out of you.

he opened pushed open your legs and ripped your panties to the side to give himself more accessibility. you pulled him closer in a desperate attempt to get his member in you. he chuckled deeply at your failed attempt.

he flashed his golden eyes up and down your body, “i should make you wait for being such a bitch..”

you shook your head fast. ecstasy completely taking over all your sense, “i didn’t mean to do all tha-“

“you still did it y/n” he shot back lowly, “i want you to beg for me” he smiled sadistically down at you.

desperation on your mind left you no other choice, “please law..”

he raised a brow unimpressed, “thats it? i know you can give me more than y/n” he slowly moved the head of his member up and down your wet folds to tease you.

you shut your eyes as you spewed a line of noncomprehensive begs. you didn’t even understand what you were saying at that point.

once satisfied with your obvious desperation on display law slowly pushed himself into you. the way he disappeared into you made his stomach do flips. your warmth completely captivating him.

you let out a quiet moan as you grip his tattooed biceps. you begged him for more.

every whine and beg drove law further off the edge. granting your wish he started his pace. it was a slow motion which picked up into a faster rhythm.

law was fascinated with how well your body took him in. every time he pulls to almost abandon your hole you take him back in fully. your moans starting to pick up as the man above you tries to fuck sense back into you, “you think you can pull stunts like that and get away with it?” he grunts in your ear, trying to suppress his own moans.

the slapping of skin becoming louder with every snap of laws hips hitting you. his rhythm, once steady and strong, starts to falter and get sloppy. your own blaze turning into a burning fire reaching the depths of your stomach. you slapped a hand over your mouth to mask the loud moans escaping your lips. law pushes your hand away and pulls you into a messy kiss while taking in every moan you gave to him. you dig your nails into his shoulders indicating you were climbing fast to your high.

the man above you fucks into you with a rough pace. he made the mistake of looking down at your eyes. the way they glossed over with ecstasy and your eyebrows taking shape of desperation made law lose his rhythm completely. he just vigorously pushed into you chasing his own high. he wanted to take a picture of your sight before him. he knew the way you looked at him would burn into his memory forever. you moaned his name while repeating how close you were. unable to suppress his moans he started to repeat your name back to you. both your names rolling off each others tongues so effortlessly.

the knot in your stomach pulled so tightly. you feel waves of ecstasy hit you as your orgasm forces itself onto you. you dig your nails into law while he covers your mouth with his hand. the sight of you moaning mindlessly because of him was enough for his knot to pull. he knew he was dangerously close as well. he continued to fuck into you to chase his high. the overstimulation causing your eyes to roll back slightly.

the sight caused laws own orgasm to hit him faster than he imagined. he pulled out quickly and released himself onto your stomach. he collapsed next to you as you both pant to regain your breaths. he stares at your messy hair, plump lips, and how your chest rises and falls. he’d be lying to himself he if he didn’t want to experience seeing you like this all the time. with sweat glistening both your tired bodies he wraps an arm around your waist and pulls you close to him.

he mumbles to you tiredly, “you dont know how long ive been wanting to do that..”

you giggle as you ease into him, “then you should’ve done it earlier”

the crackling of the candle returns you to your senses, “its good we lit a candle before hand..” you laugh tiredly at the ironic situation.

he rolls his eyes while the corner of his lips tug up slightly. he grabbed your chin and kissed you passionately to make up for all the sloppy kisses he gave earlier(he just wants your lips on his any way possible). you cup his cheek and deepen the kiss while smiling. law feels you smiling into the kiss, and it causes him to smile a bit more than he usually would.

even he’d admit that ‘candle shopping’ maybe wasn’t the worst thing in the world.

[queer-alienbean]

Jegulus fic!! much angst inspired by Lookalike by Conan Gray

600 words

“But when you look in his eyes

Do you think of mine?

And when you look at that smile

Do I cross your mind?

I know in your head

You see me instead

‘Cause he looks a lot like I did

Back then

Baby dont lie

He's just a lookalike”

Regulus tried to pretend. But he’d never been that great of an actor. He tried to fool himself, knowing it was helpless.

He couldn’t pretend it didn’t hurt. After he and James had broken up, after a tumultuous relationship of 2 years, he had locked himself in his room for days. His friends had practically had to drag him out of bed to go to meals and classes after a week. 

And through all of this, somehow someway, James had survived. No. he hadn’t even survived, he had thrived.

He won more quidditch games after they broke up, he seemed lighter, brighter. Regulus often caught himself watching James at meals, gazing at his smile and wondering why he hadn’t been able to be the cause of it. James laughed more now. And he never glanced at the slytherin table,

Well, almost never.

A month after Regulus and James broke up, James had hearts in his eyes again. And he and Barty announced their relationship to the group.

Barty.

Regulus’ best friend of 6 years, his confidant and the one he had cried to the most over the breakup.

Regulus hadn’t handled the news well, screaming and crying and throwing things at Barty. Evan had to restrain him, holding him and telling Barty to leave the dorm.

The weeks following, Regulus slipped into a routine. Avoiding all human interaction entirely, he hardly went to meals- choosing to visit the kitchens in his breaks and late at night.

He kept his grades up, not wanting to face his teachers’ worry. He spent almost all of his time in the library: reading, drawing, sleeping, journaling, anything to keep his mind busy.

Because he was afraid of what he thought when he had the time.

What if Barty was better than him? What if Barty and James had been together even while Regulus and him were? What if Regulus just wasn’t enough? Or even worse, too much?

And, Regulus realized after a while, he actually missed James. He was still so in love with him that he had a hard time being angry sometimes. 

If Barty was what made James happy, then why couldn’t he be happy for him?

Maybe Regulus needed to move on, find someone new. He tried to go to parties, but everyone he attended, James and Barty were there. And those two always found a way to be the center of attention. 

Evan comforted him, knowing that though he and Barty had broken up a year before, he could somewhat sympathize with Regulus’ feeling of betrayal.

And when Regulus went home for the holidays, he accepted his parents rough teachings, he kept silent and let them think he would join them.

And when he ran away finally, no one had expected it. And no one knew where he went.

Regulus had escaped, he was free to live as he pleased, to think and breathe by himself without the eyes of others, the expectations.

When Regulus was older, laying in his bed alone late at night, he would think back to James and his relationship, wishing it had never ended but also so grateful it had.

“And I'll admit that I

Sometimes, maybe, might

Think about you at night

No matter how I try to hide

And erase you from my mind

I’m dying

To find a lookalike”

[year2000electronics]

Hi, just being curious, what do you think is the greatest difficulty you’ve faced carrying out the storyline in your ask blogs (aside from potential burnout)?

Is there any time where the asks were not going towards the direction where you’d want them to go, and how did you steer the story back on track?

Do you have any techniques giving out clues or keeping the pace of the ask blog?

[sorry these are a lot. Of questions. It’s just, it’s amazing how you are able to run multiple successful askblogs, and I’m curious how you did it]

OOOH THESE ARE SOME INTERESTING QUESTIONS! really pickin at my old noggin here...

id say probably the most difficult part is like... ok through my tenure ive obviously had some physically taxing moments, moments of people being way too mean, people being way too NICE, people complaining that every single member of a giant ensemble cast doesnt get the exact same amount of screentime etc etc, but id honestly say the hardest part is just. making the medium Work. when i run an ask blog like this, im basically asking people to drive the story forward with no promise of whether their choices even like. Matter. if youre not tethered enough to your asks, it can feel like youre just asking people to put a coin in the slot and letting the story play for another page. you have to play this balancing act of wanting to tell the story you want to tell while also needing peoples' help to get there. thats why an engaging story and endearing characters are so important. i wound up telling people here on my main that y2k would end with a good ending specifically because i got people concerned i genuinely would end it with a Bad End, but still even knowing that people would tune in. so its like. i always have to make sure its Engaging enough. for people to be willing to play this game with me at all. the hardest part of fishing is getting the fish to bite yk.

2. YES ALL THE TIME LOLLLL a lot of the time i will end up either picking an ask from before the topic came up and answer that one, or plant my own decoy ask. basically jingling keys at people HJSSKHASGK. but sometimes even that doesnt work! benrey in y2k has a very touchy complex about his helmet specifically because I DIDNT HAVE SPRITES WITH HIS HAIR. and i thought that his hair was kinda boring compared to what people were probably expecting (its very short and simple i draw his hair like bootleg barney) so i ended up having to answer that little thread by having an explosion and then presenting my own resolution (gordon calm him down :)) i like to think ive gotten better at key jingling though haha. usually the two types of key jingling topics i find work best are either little plot teases or a 'now back to what we were doing' ask, but if you dont want things to advance quite yet, i usually use questions that will elaborate on a character trait or introduce a new character fact

3. dont be me. /j ok actually the thing about this specific medium is like. people will send me asks guessing my twists WAAAAY early on but the thing is i can just. choose not to answer them. hehe. id personally pay attention to how often people are guessing your twists though because like. its BOUND to happen if you lay out clues some people will pick up on them. if theres not a lot of people guessing, then you can lean more into the big sting reveals of like 'NOOOOBODY EXPECTED THIS' but when a lot of people have guessed the twist, i usually make sure to present it in a way that doesnt imply that there was nobody on the right trail or that people got bamboozled. as for the clues themselves. well im about to figure that out myself again! i have some clues i need to lay in bmfe!! dont get discouraged if people pick up on what you thought was really subtle, cos like. literal day 1 of episode 3 someone literally made a powerpoint saying 'LEADING LIGHT IS BACK' and i was like ok i was just on my first crumb DAMN. as for pacing, it doesnt matter if you get the blog done in one month or one year- what does matter is PLANNING. if you know what your goal is, what your landmarks and checkpoints are, youll be able to stagger stuff successfully no matter the length. some of the best-recieved parts of y2kvr were parts i went into the session going 'this is my goal for today' for. the goals dont even have to big, it could even be something as small as like 'get from place a to place b'

SORRY THIS GOT LONG but ty for the question! reflecting on my process is interesting :]

[kosmicdream]

Well, Chapter 6 of Nasty red Dogs is finally complete. This chapter took about a year to make and it was one of the hardest chapters to make. A lot of factors played into this, but probably the hardest one was my day job making the whole process much slower. This meant that there was a lot more time for me to sit and think, sometimes this was a benefit, but in general I am a massive over-thinker, so that dragged down a lot of my enjoyment of the process as I kept over analyzing all my choices. 

But, it wasn’t just chapter 6 that was tough. For a while, i have been struggling with Nasty Red Dogs. This isn’t a surprise, its something i face with every long-term project and it makes sense that I would hit that moment at some point. NRD is 5 years old now and while its getting closer to being complete, we still have a few more chapters to go. My process for it is much slower, so a single chapter can end up taking a long time. Still, this past chapter was both the longest in length for a NRD chapter and also took the longest to make, so it was a very tedious process.

I have dont a lot more writing and rewriting than I normally would do, and while I don’t consider myself much of a perfectionist, it was really starting to creep back in my mind in a way I haven’t experienced in years, but more so targeting my writing than anything. I also got very critical over my drawings, but I have felt that way outside of NRD too. I am still very proud of the end result of this chapter, but I don’t think im out of the storm yet. It took years for me to refind my footing with FFAK and Eggshells, but I eventually got there and both projects, and I, got stronger for it. I expect that to happen here too, its just pretty draining and difficult. Regardless of the struggle, I am glad that it’s bringing deep feelings like that out of me because I feel like that’s the whole point of trying to make something that takes so many years to finish, cuz it really creates a situation where you are having to challenge your own personal demons on a mundane, daily level and sorting through those feelings. I don’t really know if the story is going to end up “good” or even how i want it to, but I know I’ve changed from it as an artist, and that already makes it invaluable to my journey to make great stories, which has always been my deepest dream to do on this planet.

That being said, I need a break from NRD to rebuild my stamina again. As I said, we’re nearing the end of the story.. But not quite there. I do expect there to be at least 3 more chapters, but considering how I originally planned for Chapter 5 & Chapter 6 to be a single chapter, that could change. It is still all written though, and has been, but pacing the scenes often changes as I’m actually “on the set” and “directing” the moments. While NRD is on hiatus, I will be returning to FFAK, which I have been pretty desperate to return to as I’ve been looking forward to ARC2 for literally years. I also know ARC2 of FFAK is tremendously long, possibly 4x longer in length than all of NRD (my expected length of ARC2 is around 4k or 5k pages).. So Of course, i get anxious when I’m not drawing it for too long. As I mentioned before, I already kinda got through a really huge block with FFAK that took years to address & heal from and I’m very happy to say that I’m in a great place with the project again, in a way that i haven’t felt in years (even if it still feels very different and new.) So returning to it makes me tremendously happy, which I will need to be in high spirits to feel like I can tackle the next NRD chapter. Anyway, I just wanted to share some of my thoughts on this past chapter and as always- thanks for reading my comics. Every day, Its the first thing i check are comments on them and it is always the last thing i do before sleeping. They are always on my mind, but also so are the readers, and I want to deliver my story to those who are willing to listen to them. -kosmic

[fantastic-mr-corvid]

why i don't really write things centering jjba!Cecio?

So... JJBA Cecio... and why dont i write much about his central thing of being a mafia controlled cop or change it to something else. warnings for discussion of police and their role as violent enforcers of the state

Tldr: i feel uncomfortable humanizing a cop while writing how much corruption and brutality they do, in a way i dont feel with Muro and Tesoro and Conficcare despite them also doing awful things, meaning i dont think i will ever properly write about the center of Cecios story, but also i dont want to change it to something that triggers me less bc its so core to his character and came from something i was trying to say, so its just gonna be this hole that i maneuver around.

so in Celia & co, Cecio is persuaded to train as an officer and act as a informant and inside agent for Passione by a member of the data analysis team, and uses his sob story and pretty face to act as a 'good cop' while secretly doing what passione wants from him- evidence tampering, altering cases, disappearing people, ect..

For many many reasons i struggle to write him with the same level of flawed humanity and emotion as i give my other also horrible and violent characters [Muro, Tesoro, ect...] when hes in uniform, mainly because of me and my communities experiences with police brutality.

yeah, yeah, we need to remember that these people are human and many of us can all turn into fascistic and violent enforcers the states will if in the wrong circumstances and we shouldn't label pigs as something other and separate, rather as people who believe the lies and often think they are doing 'right'

But you wont see much of that from me. the only good cop is a dead cop, and its not exactly subversive or needed to go "🥺 but they have thoughts and feelings and reasons and family too! 🥺" [🤢] I place it in a similar mental spot as "Look at all those poor soldiers traumatized by killing brown people" aka we dont need more and in pretty poor taste to focus on their trauma over the trauma and deaths of people they are killing.

So don't expect any fics exploring Cecios mindset as he ruins peoples lives because its probably never happening unless we see a world were a complete abolishing the police is feasible and nothing arises to replace them and i also get over my own revulsion of everything cop.

[am i biased in how i humanize Muro and Tesoro and Conficcare and Rametta and the conditions that led to them being career criminals but draw a line at a pig? Eh. Maybe, but quite frankly i think drawing a line at humanizing perpetrators of state sanctioned violence and giving sympathy to the reasons they do in my own works is a pretty sane line to draw. i mean i've lived in one of the worst areas of london and all i gotta say on gang shit is my dad probably deserved it when he got his ass beat and i kept my head low and my tone respectable like any smart kid, whereas nothing quite inspires fear in me like seeing a cop]

Now onto why i haven't changed it even if i will probably never be able to explore whats pretty much the center of his character.

He's a piss take. a satire. A commentary on the very thin line of legality that separates cops from violent criminals in the eyes of the public

Cecio is a police officer who works for a criminal organization and follows their explicit and implicit orders to frame people, brutalize them, fake evidence, and make sure that no-one around him is 'good' and are instead beaten down and manipulate into going with whatever his superiors want. He is a blight on his community and betrays them to help himself, all while pretending to be a nice and good young man, with people eating it up to excuse the acts he commits.

So he's just a slightly worse than average cop 🤷‍♂️

there's just functionally so little difference between his role as a police officer and his role as mafia plant in the force, other than sometimes his orders from the cops and criminals conflict.

Maybe i will change him to some other career, like a forensics cop not just a detective, where he isnt quite the same in terms of enacting violence and is 'just' altering evidence, but the core of his character is the idea that you slap a pretty face and a sob story on a very dangerous criminal cop and he can get away with anything, and that the line between organized crime and police forces is mainly which one is formally employed by the government. [Its why trickster is perfect for him, his character is one big joke at how society excuses police corruption and state violence with the thinnest of excuses]

Im turning reblogs off on this, but im more than happy to answer questions/asks given in good faith. this shit is something i dont mind discussing its more the act of writing a story about it makes me too uncomfortable

[vaporsystem]

The other night I felt like i was gonna have a panic attack so i was like "someone please take over idc who" and someone actually did i was like "oh damn i didnt expect that to work." :)

I think it was that one thing that appeared a while ago that didnt like talking. I still dont really know who that is. Also i dont really remember drawing that last post so ermm thats also kinda interesting.

I need to take more time talking to people and figuring out whos whos cause I still dont know who the usual me is. Im a little afraid of finding out the me who i think i am is like 7 people but like it feels wrong to keep just pretending the body is like its own thing, cause like im pretty sure im not who that person is right now even, but theres not a good or easy way to express that if none of us know who we are!!!

I know who """""the girl in my head""""" is even though ironically shes not around that often, i know helix is in here and they like actually talk sometimes. I know that one person is in here that we havnt talked about, we can call them Z i guess, i think theyre like the closest thing we have to a "gatekeeper" or whatever. Theres another girl that showed up, asked for a room, then just kinda never came back out but we like her she can have a place to live. Like i think its pretty obvious Raven is in here at this point right like we dont really need to hide that do we. Fictives seem really common so we dont need to like pretend. Im not sure who i am rn but :). but then theres like that one fucking person who says theyre the me that is me but thats not all of us!!! youre jsut you!!!!

Z thought they were them because when we tried to start building our mind place or whatever they were there and took over and tried to sort all of us out, but it seems like the they that them there was a different person when they werent inside so like ???

i KNOW at the end of the day were all the same person i GUESS but like...bitch you gotta figure out your own shit so we dont have to keep like pretending to be you just cause youre confused! also anyway can we stop using psuedonyms please its getting stupid and hard to keep up with no one is going to like dox your head people like "ohhh their headmate is named steve now ive got them" only three people see this anyway unless this shows up on someones fyp in which case ermm hiii

oh maybe we should liek start doing that thing where like we start signing off with emoji or whatever so we can keep track of whos who when we start talking on here cause like. its obvious to us right but like it probably looks nutty to everyone else, but also we kinda like hate all the cliches and stereotypes and stuff that people do on here like the people with people in their heads on tumblr are so obsessed with emojis we dont really get it, but i guess we dont know all of our names yet so it makes it a little easier. i dont know how to open the emohi menu 🌼🌻💐🌺these all kind of suck...🧁🎀👚🦄🦑we can pick one later i guess i like the cupcake and the horse, we could let outrselves be a pony....we could be pinkie pie if we wanted to be like no one could stop us but then people would think of that one screaming one probably but like.......................pongey.......

anyway i like being happy!!!! its so fun to come to the front because like that they that is them is so fucking like dull and they dont want to believe in us so like fuck it were gonna keep interuppting when they come over here. Helix did it first we can all have a turn!!!! theyre gonna be like "what if im wrong :((((((" when were literally fucking like loling and lmaoing rn. like sorry we dont all have epic backstories about like showing up in times of need im sorry we cant all be the girls you have a thing for 🙄 maybe i can just want to like eat candy for once instead of like saving you from depression or whatever WHICH LIKE ITS GOOD that the others were there for that im not like evil but like we dont ALL have to be that to be real!!!! im gettin very tired noww ppl will read this and be like woahh but itll be cool because theyll be like new bitch?? and youll be like ouuu ermmm nooo dont looook but its too late!!! hiiiii hi hi hiii

[tetskuro]

hello! i will be 🍓, i go by she/her.

- i want a romantic matchup 🤭, preferably male

- i am an infp. i would say i’m a very shy and awkward person when i first meet someone. i dont say too much at first, but once i feel close to someone i open up more. i’d say my humor is a little strange (brainrot 😔) and i express it with the right people. i try my best in school because i want to be successful in the future. i get emotional easily. i always try to look after my friends and listen to them whenever they need me.

- i like playing guitar, crocheting, reading, drawing and painting. i play badminton and volleyball sometimes. i plan to be a nurse. i like to watch thought-provoking movies. i like anything with romance in it. i need music whenever i do something. i like kpop.

- i want my partner to be a gentleman. he needs to treat everyone around him with respect. i want him to be on the same wavelength as me. i look for a good sense of humor. i want him to show that he loves and cares for me. quality time is everything. he has to be kind too of course!

- any kind of date would be ideal. as long as i get to be with them.

- i think that’s all? this is really cool, pls take your time with these!! i’m excited to see!!

your matchup is...

akaashi keiji

⭑ akaashi is soft-spoken and polite to everyone, maybe a tad bit blunt but that's what makes him charming

⭑ literally everyone loves akaashi, i can't think of a single person in haikyuu who dislikes him

⭑ very gentlemanly and he clearly has a lot of respect for everyone that he interacts with

⭑ that doesn't mean he doesn't throw sarcastic and cheeky remarks here and there lol

⭑ his logic can help balance out your emotions

⭑ akaashi's biggest love language is quality time

⭑ the two of you often spend hours doing random things together like reading, painting, watching movies, or even just sitting comfortably in silence

⭑ you two would watch a lot of movies that get your minds to really think deeply

⭑ he'd enjoy discussing the movie with you once you finish watching it

⭑ akaashi can be a little weird and i say this endearingly

⭑ it's definitely not something you expected when you first met him since he seemed so calm and put together

⭑ not to say that he isn't those things but it takes a bit of time after you get to know each other to see more sides to him

⭑ akaashi's humor leans toward the deadpan side with the random comments he makes in a monotone voice but he picks up some brainrot terms from you

⭑ it's not often that he uses brainrot phrases but you catch him saying them every so often

⭑ for example, you heard akaashi say "-1000 aura points" when bokuto flubbed a spike one time

⭑ you'd have akaashi swooning if you ever played the guitar for him omg he'd feel so relaxed listening to you and he'd be watching you with the softest expression on his face

⭑ he'd love to play volleyball and wants to learn badminton as well so you guys could play together

⭑ akaashi wouldn't be picky either when it comes to where you guys go out on dates though i feel he'd like it to be a bit private where there aren't too many people around

your matchup runner-up is ennoshita chikara

[beastscribbles]

metamorphosis

I am different.

in more ways than 1.

i feel different

i look different

i act different .

in elementary school i was physically regular i suppose. i was a regular height, had light brown hair that went a little past my shoulders, not quite curly, but not straight enough to behave. i was not fat nor skinny, i was in the middle. i had a gap tooth, and my skin was a little tan, but not too much, my smooth skin not yet marred by life.

mentally though, i was very different. at school i was a polite, advanced, sometimes a little rowdy, but straight-A, student who loved to read and draw. at home, i was different. i would fight with my parents, yell and scream at them until i couldn't anymore. then i would stomp up the stairs to my room, my stomach hot with anger, my fists clenched. i would fall onto my bed and cry, cry, cry. i had no release for my anger and overwhelming, consuming emotions, so i would scratch my face over and over till it was red, and some of the pain had faded. it only got worsened from there. i was constantly miserable or extremely anxious, with emotions i couldn't explain or handle.

In middle school i had started some new medications, one of which interfered with my metabolism. i went about my regular life but gained a lot of weight. my mom made me go to a clinic at the hospital to lose weight. she wanted me to get a surgery to manage my weight. i didn't know about the medicines effects, and so for about 2 years i thought i was lazy, ugly and stupid. in school, i had started getting A-C grades, and as a kid with high expectations for my self i felt like a failure. my mental health was stagnant, not improving or getting worse.

in high school. I have been going to therapy for years. i take about 10 medications throughout the day for various mental illnesses. i still feel a bit like im not good enough if i dont get an A, but i recover quickly and im learning to be patient with myself. my anxiety is now manageable, and my depression fluctuates. i am in a much better mental state though. but, physically? im struggling. i do a sport. in this sport i have a mindset that i cant seem to escape. i think if im not constantly practicing then i will look lazy, and people will think i dont care, and in the moments where im so tired i feel like i will fall over and faint i need to keep going and that will make me better. i know its wrong and unhealthy, but i cant stop it. the medication i got to balance the weight gain from the other medication ruins my appetite, and often just the thought of food makes me nauseous. i dont eat much. ive become picky, and dont eat full meals. i am simply not hungry. this paired with the way i push myself, has caused me to lose a lot of weight. my old clothes dont fit as well. in the mirror im much thinner, and i have lost the chubby cheeks i once had. but the rapid weight loss has caused me to be extremely dizzy, nauseous, cold and lightheaded.

i have become different. i am no longer the girl i used to be. i dont even know if its a good thing or not.

[adamnagaitisnews]

Okay, it's like i have to break my promise not to write publicly, i hate it. but this one, i really want everyone to see it. first of all, i want @carolsfeelgoodstuff to read it bc she won't leave me alone and won't contact me personally.

We'll talk the concepts of YouTube and self-sufficiency.

1)YouTube.

YouTube is the world biggest platform for videos, it allows to upload the largest and the best quality videos possible. Also, YouTube is the first place anyone would go searching. I cut my vids to pieces to be able to upload every second available without violating the copyright of the original owner. Sometimes my vids get blocked, sometimes the rightholders unblock them, it's a very complicated system, and we're not talking about it today. but i always try to make everything stay on the channel the longest time possible. Why? It's done for the fans who may come not today, not even tomorrow. A year, 5 years, 10 years, whatever. It's an archive of everything in one place available for everyone from everywhere in the world. That's it. That's why i care about quality so much. Everything is categorized by folders (for the times when he is super famous ehehe) for quick search.

So, it's YouTube.

Now your favourite part. The word 'EXCLUSIVE' (my ass ™). That's where we come to the concept of

2) Self-sufficiency.

When i first started it, i was different, let's say so. I thought im gonna do something and people will love me (i know, ridiculous, ive grown up since then). It was not about archive, it was about me wishing to be included. Long story short, it failed. (i strongly believe everyone knows this story of me attacking people out of the blue like a rabid dog. Am i proud of it? No. But what's done is done.)

I had two ways. To stop doing what i was doing or to go on alone. I chose the latter :). This channel was the first thing in my life i didn't abandon after 5 minutes. I enjoyed every second of it. Editing, making covers, avoiding blocking and deciding what im gonna do next. Adam turned out a perfect muse for me. I never get tired of his face and he always inspires me to try something new. Months later, I understood that i didn't need to be included anymore, it was so enjoyable that i knew even if everyone unfollows me today, im gonna start from scratch tomorrow just because i love it. Even when it sux.

I stopped asking people here and on twitter to subscribe (i do ask on yt but it's a common practice). I became self-sufficient.

Wow! You ve read up to this! EXCLUSIVE (my ass ™).

When i discovered Branwell's vids, i was sooo excited (my ass ™), i posted an extract on twitter immediately but no one seemed interested. I won't describe the circles of hell i went through to upload it to yt in THREE, CARL, pieces to make it available all over the world. And i still wanted everyone here and on twitter to see it. The word EXCLUSIVE (my ass ™) seemed to fit the best to draw attention, bc i was absolutely sure no one saw it before. Then @wifeofbath asked me where i got it, but i was still pissed (not proud), and never responded. As simple as that.

You gonna ask me why i said no to you. Speaking both Louvel and Hamlet, when i do something i find especially appealing, i feel an urge to make a post here and on twitter. Even if no one likes it. it's a ✔️ for me. Like mission completed or something.

Speaking Hamlet in particular, first, because i wanted to gif this one myself. Hamlet is a really big deaI for me. Second, i was dumb and it took me longer than expected to find it (on rutracker, my ass!). Third, im so so so sorry to say it aloud, and please don't take it personally and for fuck's sake dont stop giffing, but like i said, i have nothing to lose. Im a rabid dog :). i stopped visiting tumblr as often as i used to because i couldn't find other people's posts through the mass of your gifs. I got irritated and just left quietly and went into post'n'go mode. Tbh i was embarrassed when you wrote me here through the question form. Also, later i found you annoying, and im sorry for that.

So these were all cases when anyone asked me for a source of anything.

Everything i post i found in open sources, it's like a sport for me. First you find it, then you post and then there's this russian roulette moment - will it be blocked or not? Or will i have to cut the shit out of it to make it available all over the world? With those videos, Im concentrated on yt only, i dont aim to upload it anywhere else, bc see pt. 1. I don't own them, i dont care who else posts them and where. Ive learned my lessons and i wanna go on in peace.

Thanks for reading this,

Seems like im finally free now,

If there are any questions, please ask, im gonna answer.

❤️,

Al

[notashrew]

Do you have any more funky facts about Herbert? 👀

Oh dear I was not expecting this much of actual interest over him 👀

Uh anyways Herbert is still rather underdeveloped character so i don't have much of anything interesting or grounded to give but uh

*slaps his tiny ass* this man can fit so many most obscure references nobody but I get and laugh at like he's 90% based of just random snippets of jokes inside my brain

One being he can't drive car for shit. You put him on a driver seat and the entire thing just Garry Mods itself across the air

Likes to collect all sorts of tiny stuff, mainly medical things and organs, vulture culture things perhaps? sussu dont make a character that hoards something challenge

Has/used to have bad scopophobia aka fear of being stared at

Dude had it so bad that when he noticed there's cameras around the bases or battlemaps, he would strategically avoid them and this often lead to him underworking or in general avoid his job as a field Medic, pissing of Administration real bad

I haven't really fully decided yet, but I'm leaning more towards he was born in Germany like every single medic ever and at some point of his life moved to England to study plastic surgery. Had a little bit hard time there as a german as this was at some point during/after WW2 and people looked down at him easily because of his national heritage

Avoids announcing his surname aloud because of this, and lets people pronounce his name in english way rather than german to avoid revealing his origins totally not me just avoiding revealing the other reference where his name comes from because it kills me

Specialized himself as plastic surgeon, more specifically facial and functional reconstruction, working on the soldiers returning from war and rehabilitating them

Had very hard time getting through his job as one in the rehabiliation hospital due to stressful nature of the job. He was already having some anxiety issues but kept them all hidden through his life

Used to visit a local butcher shop and watch people work there, perhaps even do some meat cuttings himself to relief with self-harming thoughts

I GUESS I HAVE TO MAKE THIS CANON NOW??? BECAUSE I DREW IT IN HIS REF SHEET BUT UH the stress eventually lead him to actually cutting himself on the arm with a bone saw, which got him kicked out "for weak nature", later leading him to get hired into BLU through some coincidenses. He carried the scar with him for a long time before getting himself together after beheading himself, and gave himself a skin transplant to cover old wound

I'm aiming to avoid drawing his old face and head as much as possible if there ever will be need for that, you watch me parkouring my way through never giving a face reveal

Has A LOT of freckles all over his upper body

Administration has tried to kick him out of the team TWICE but for once in his lifetime he grew up some spine to save himself a moment before beheading himself

The exposed bit of his neck is super sensitive and sometimes he [redacted but if you know me you know what this is about and answer is yes like 100% yes]

Uuhhh I'd have some more but it's mostly just some undecided stuff and here are probably the most grounded facts, sorry nothing funny and silly yet sadly.

[mayullla]

I dont play twisted wonderland, but I wanted to make something for this fandom from reading multiple yan!twst. I kept most things vague, but if I got something wrong about a character tell me. One day when I am finally able to change my phone the first thing i would do is download this game TvT

Edit: I play Twisted Wonderland now-

Tags: fem!reader, child!reader, platonic yandere Characters: School staff

Imagine just a small child was the one who gets taken into twisted wonderland rather than Yuu. The small child doesn't even know where she was as the cat who was surprised kept bugging her with question after queation about how you got here and such.

You cant answer, you didnt even have the answers as you just remember falling asleep on your bed peacefully only to wake up in a huge box opened by a cat.

A talking cat at that.

Dear the stress you gave to the poor thing when you suddenly grabbed the cat's cheeks and just pulled them. Made the poor cat yell in pain.

Crowley found you soon after, shocked to see a small child here in twisted wonderland! As he too started to ask where your parent was and how did you get here even berating the cat for being you here. (The cat Grim just continued to vehemently deny that he was the one who brought you here!!) You could not answer the man, just cheerfully telling the man that you were sleeping in your bed only to wake up here.

After realizing that he can't get any answers from your Crowley just picked you up in his arms as he called the other teachers to his office. 

The other teachers were also surprised when they saw you in Crowley's arms. They had wondered why the headmaster suddenly called for an emergency meeting and expected a few things may have gone wrong or some sort sure...

but a kid??

Sam jokingly asked if you were Crowley's kid that he never told anyone about which Crowley pointedly denied. He soon explained what had happened.

The teachers tried to push you for answers, some almost demanding you to give them till you burst out crying for feeling so much pressure. Professor Mozus suddenly took you away from Crowley's arms comforting you in his arms trying to shush as he glared at the other teachers for being so pushy to a small kid.

Slowly they found out that you were from another realm, not from here and that they cant just easily send you off to your home.

Your family probably thought you were kidnapped at this point!

Crowley had an idea of sending you to an orphanage while he research a way to get you back to your home but reasons aroused that made it impossible to send you away like that.

That the teachers were forced to take care of you.

That would not be a problem at all…. sure…

Who will be taking care of the kid?

It was Mozus who spoke first at the silent atmosphere saying that he would be the one taking care of you tho he would probably occasionally need help if his teacher's duty kept him busy and that was fine with others.

A lot of students were shocked to see you in professor Mozus's arms most of the second years and up have to blink multiple of times or rub their eyes shocked to see a kid with the professor much less smiling at the old guy. The fact that he was also smiling at you made many students believe that this was either a dream or an illusion some choosing to forget the whole thing.

Well, as if that was possible when you follow the old guy to class listening in on the lessons... Listening to the old man or occasionally be seen drawing something while the old man would yell at the student who stared at you for too long.

Sometimes they found you to be with other teachers who looked rather awkward to the fact that they had to watch you. Sometimes they would yell only to hold their tongue when they realize a small child was there in their classroom and might cry like she did last time and they won't be able to fix the situation.

But time went by they grew more and more attached to you. They started to often fight on who you would stay with when Mozus was busy, not only that they started to ask Mozus if he ever wants rest they could help him watch over you. It was suspicious when they do that for Mozus who always deny their offer preferring to be with you than let others take care of you.

It was even annoying when Crowley started to ask Mozus if he could take care of you at that point Mozus's cat would hiss at the headmaster wearing a crow mask daring him not to go near you or even touch you.

Lucius was also the same with the students hissing at those who wanted to talk to you. The more curious students would often try to get close to while the teacher is teaching to ask who you were and if you really were the daughter of professor Mozus or any other questions that had to deal with the rumors floating around not before they were caught by a teacher and shooed away from you.

There were many rumors floating around about you and since they can't go near you and the teachers all give mixed or vague answers none of those rumors were able to be put to rest.

There were rumors where people thought that you were the daughter of Professor Mozus who gave his daughter to the other professors to take care of her every so often. That somehow Professor Mozus had either fallen in love or had a one night stand incident or just something when tho almost nobody could believe that.

Professor Mozus would often smile if asked if you were his daughter about it not denying or accepting the rumors to be true, while other teachers would quickly deny any claims of it which only made things all the more suspicious really. (Tho everybody saw the sour face professor Mozus had when asked about the mother.)

Mozus would get you to wear a more sophisticated look with dark colors and frills occasionally he would make you wear a more pastel lolita style, it makes you look as if you were really the daughter of Mozus which the professors absolutely dislike. So whenever they got you they would quickly swap your outfit that Mozus picked into something more their style. Crowley probably has a small mask and coat that is similar to his when he would make you wear as you go around campus carried in his arms as you giggled at how ticklish the feathers on the mask were.

When you are in Divus's hands you would be wearing a small white fur coat as he told you to straighten your back and chin up. The professor tries to make you a model somtimes and would nag you to keep the jacket on even when you feel stuffy. While Sam would make you wear clothes oh his color tones with an added skull as you try and help around the shop (most things he wouldn't dare you to touch would be placed on the high shelves). Same for Ashton where he would make you wear something of sports wear.

At some point, the professors started fighting for your attention trying to get you to come them that day with promises, candy, toys and even more. The students who have seen this happening cannot believe their ears so much so that they again choose to believe that all this was a dream and nothing more, choosing in the end to forget what had happened and when somebody talks about it they block their ears and started a shout as if doing that could deny them the reality of what has happened.

It was never said that Crowley stopped seaching for a way for you to go back. They didnt want you to leave having grown so attached to you, they wanted to be with you, they wanted you to stay while they became your official guardians.

So when you started to cry wanting to see your parents, they will soothe you by telling you that it was alright, that it was okay that they would be with you and that they would never abandon you. They would not disappear like your parents did and they would love you more than your parents ever did.

Really it is rather often that some of the teachers would fight over who actually becomes your father, sure all of them became your guardians but who is like your father? Sam is alright being your uncle so long as he was your favorite uncle but like it was never decided who is your father…

[extravalgant]

AND SO... my own designs of the the 101 main character designs are here +_+

more under the cut because surprisingly a lot of thought went into their design and how it looked

— the wizards prominent red design coupled with the blue that i used for accents (as well as the gold and white) all tie back to merle ambrose, as he has his own red/blue color scheme, only switched

— this was intentional, made to show that the wizard has become merle ambrose's new prodigy and therefore reflects that in their attire - the stars on their hat also contribute to that.

— the sun and moon imagery here is also purposeful - ive always been a fan of those types of character relationships and it shows here. however, i believe that the wizard has had to be their own sun and their own moon in comparison, simply due to the fact that they cannot afford to blindly place the immense amount of trust and vulnerability in someone else. in this way - they are their own sun and moon, and in this way, they know that realistically the only person they can rely on is theirself.

- the other part of me, however, just likes the way celestial designs look.

— being the savior of the spiral, i believe they have to look the part. i chose to go with the original novice robes for inspiration mainly bc of nostalgia related reasons, but also because i think it provides something unique with its design. the wizard looks professional - something that should be expected of when it comes to their titles of "savior of the spiral".

— AS FOR THE PIRATE... i think you can somewhat tell that their design was created first due to how sketchy it looks

— their design originally spawned when i spent those 3 days figuring out how to draw kane and then drawing nothing else LMFAO.

— im not too satisfied with the hat but thats also why i made a version without it... so i could avoid drawing it ❤️ but if you want to change the hat by all means . go ahead

— the eyepatch, necklaces, and earrings were added as a way of spicing things up. i like the air of mystery that the eyepatch has, i like the little pop of flare the earrings bring, and the necklaces add a bit of natural clutter to the pirates design, almost as if they want to be the center of attention

- u will see me draw the eyepatch on the wrong side sometimes. this is because i am stupid

— the asymmetrical parts of their design also contribute to the overall chaotic look i want to bring to them. whereas the wizard's is perfectly symmetrical to signify the way they must maintain order as defender of the spiral, the pirate's asymmetrical vest and pants serve to show that their journey is different; they may have devoted themselves to bringing down kane, but it doesn't mean that theyre not necessarily going to do it the clean and good way.

- in this way, it reflects the status of their stories – the wizard's story, while less personal, deals with entirety of the spiral; the pirate's story, while not dealing with the whole spiral, deals with something on a more personal level, as our parents were originally involved in the el dorado expedition, which is what the majority of the game takes part in.

— you may notice that some parts seem... weird or maybe dont make sense, like the way the boots look, for example. this is because i thought they looked cool. u will notice that i often sacrifice the logistics of things on the basis that it has to look cool. unfortunately i will not stop

— the coat does not... have a coherent design but it was also made to help the pirate look cooler 😭 doesnt it look nice draped across their shoulders like that...

- i will design the whole coat one day, but it will probably take a while so... bear with me. i also want to give the wizard a cool looking cloak but that requires me digging into my character inspiration boards so u will also need to be patient with that 🙏

— i was going to draw the wizard and the pirate's wand and weapon, but i realized i did.. NOT want to do that and wanted to get this out as quickly as possible... so 💔 you are on your own

- unless i actually get up off my ass and design it . in which case u also need to wait for that

THATS ALL AS FAR AS MY DESIGN NOTES....

[ellitx]

Oh may I ask what are the pros and cons of having the anemo archon as your s/o?

warning: nsfw is under the cut

SFW

Pros

Venti will play and compose music with you! So if you’re into music, he’s the best lover you could have~

It’s always fun being with him! He’ll let you meet Dvalin and have you riding at his back with him! If Dvalin isn’t available, he’ll glide with you around Cape Oath or use the wind current to lift you up!

Very affectionate. Expect getting lots of hugs and kisses from him so if you’re touch starved, he’s the best choice in fulfilling it for you 24/7

adding to him being so affectionate, there’ll be lots of pda from him. if you dont like being kissed in public, holding hands is already enough for him! he loves the feeling of you soft and smooth hands against his, often squeezing it or drawing small circles on the back of your hand as both of you stroll in mondstadt’s town square or at windrise

The sweetest lover! He always gives you compliments everyday and he notices the small changes in you! Wearing a new hairclip? Absolutely stunning~ a new summer dress? he’ll slither his arms around your waist and whispers in your ear that you look so gorgeous

if you need someone to talk to, he’s there for you! centuries of living in this world, he knows pretty much everything and he can give you a good advice about life and its purpose. he’s not just a lover but also a good friend for you~

Cons

Clingy. he always wants to be by your side 24/7 and you have to tell right in front of him that you also need time for yourself. if you dont tell him where you’re off to, he’s going to look for you all around mondstadt. 

venti easily gets jealous and gets possessive of you. one thing he despises the most is when he sees you talking to the traveler or drinking with the captain cavalry of the knights of favonius or playing chess with a certain winery owner

venti loves drinking so expect that he smells like wine. and speaking of that, on nights he mostly spends his time in the tavern so if you want him to come home (if you’re living together) you really have to tell him about his drinking habits so he can lessen it, but more preferable if he stops

he’s an archon. he can live for more than a century and it always breaks his heart the thought of you passing away so he always spends a quality time with you, make memorable memories, and have fun being with together.

NSFW

Pros

really really really loves to spoil you. just ask/beg for it and he’ll give it to you instantly

Listens and abides all your wishes. at first he’ll be a tease, he loves to see you beg for his fingers, cock, and/or tongue when it comes to this heated session with him. dw, he’ll give in to your desires since he doesnt want to see his princess disappointed or unsatisfied

sweet talker, and always gives you praises if you want to be the giver. he wants to boost up your confidence and seeing your eyes sparkle whenever he throws you a compliments makes his heart flutter 

what’s wonderful about venti is that he’s considerate, thoughtful, and has your well-being and happiness in mind. He’s compassionate and able to feel into your needs and desires, just a single whiny moan from you or your fingers tugging to his hair he already knows what you need.

Good at aftercare! after hours of lovemaking, he’ll be really sweet in taking care of you. he’ll prepare the bath and asks if you ever need anything. 

when it comes to bathing together, he loves to hold you close to him! one thing he does like is when he washes your back and you do the same for him~ he just finds it sweet and adorable being together in the bathtub

Cons

If you’re into BDSM then sorry that’s a big no for him. He doesn’t like including physical harm in sex. He loves you too much he can’t bring himself to degrade or spank you

Big problem he has somnophilia kink. So if you’re asleep and found yourself waking up with aching pain in between your legs, it’s because Venti likes pounding you while you’re asleep.

Even if you consent this, he has the urge to do it everyday. So if it’s really fine with you, expect that you won’t be able to walk for days.

he places lots of marks on your body. be it the crescent shapes from his fingers digging to your skin, love bites, or his absolute favorite: marking you with anemo

some are difficult to hide since he places lots of hickeys on your neck and shoulders, so you really have to cover it with a makeup or a scarf

venti really really wants to cum inside you, only if you allow him tho. but if he cums on your back or stomach, he makes a mess of it by smearing it all over your body before he licks it off and have another round with you

VERY HORNY. im telling you, he always wants to fuck you everyday but he limits himself for only twice or thrice a week and that includes his somnophilia unless you also have a very high sexual urges as him then he’ll happily indulged you his love

a tease in public. he sometimes flicks your skirt up with the wind to see what panties you’re wearing for today, or when seated in the tavern, his hands under the table will wander from your legs to your thighs until his fingers landed on your clothed core and starts teasing it until you’re dripping wet

[grapesodatozier]

so close to the real thing (closer than you think)

rating: explicit

word count: 6.8k

summary: Eddie's been pining over Richie for as long as he can remember. He loves everything about Richie; especially how much Richie loves touching him. It's a little inconvenient, though. Eddie copes with his pent up sexual tension by constantly checking a porn blog he's obsessed with on tumblr. This guy has the same type of body as Richie, he talks like Richie, his name is even Richie! It makes it all too easy for Eddie to pretend it really is Richie while getting himself off to all of the blog's content.

You'll never guess what he finds out when he starts sexting this stranger named Richie from his anonymous porn blog.

tags: friends to lovers, porn with feelings, love confessions, dom/sub dynamics, bi dom top richie, gay sub bottom eddie, the most oblivious pining idiots in the world lol we love them

notes: this is one of my more ridiculous ideas but I had so much fun with it lol. also as a note you probably should not approach people on the internet the way they do in this fic, but they're just v enthusiastic and everything here is v consensual!! still tho definitely don't take this indulgent fic as a guide on how to approach real people online lmao. okay have fun!!

read on ao3 or below!!

notsfw under the cut

Eddie Kaspbrak’s friends were his entire world; time spent with them meant everything to him. But he also really valued his alone time. He’d always been the sort who needed time to just sit on a grassy hill and watch the trains go by, to catch up on comics in his room, to get lost in Netflix shows or even just his thoughts as he moseyed around his apartment—one he live in by himself, for when these moods hit. He needed time to himself to unwind. And sometimes he unwound by scrolling through some porn blogs on tumblr with his hand in his pants.

There was one blog that he was particularly fond of. There were other blogs more catered to his personal interests, namely blogs that didn’t feature women like this one did. But there was a good balance of genders represented, so Eddie figured he could just scroll past those posts. This guy was worth it. His pictures were ridiculously hot, and his dirty talk was even hotter.

Also, his name was Richie. Which Eddie refused to acknowledge as part of the draw.

It was harder to ignore tonight. He’d been out with the losers, and Richie had just been so touchy. And there was something about the way he'd been talking; his voice was lower than normal, slower in a way that made Eddie’s stomach flip. And his touches had lingered, his hand squeezing Eddie’s hip slow, then lazily brushing against his ass as he dropped it. Eddie could hardly take it. He brushed it off as Richie just being tired from work, but god, Eddie wanted it to mean more. The hardest part was hiding how much he wanted Richie to keep doing it.

There were so many things Eddie wanted Richie to do to him. He wanted Richie to touch him harder, to grab him by his hips with both hands. Richie’s hands were so big; Eddie just knew Richie could manhandle him so easily, so roughly. He wanted to know what it would feel like to have Richie’s hands all over him, grabbing at his ass and his thighs, holding his wrists down, making him feel so small. While Eddie would never admit it, huffing at every short joke Richie made, but he loved being shorter than Richie. He loved how safe he felt when Richie held him. And he was dying to know how small he would feel with Richie looming above him, or sitting in Richie’s lap, bouncing on his cock. He wanted to hear Richie talking to him in that low, slow voice, with that condescension Eddie did his best to pretend not to be affected by. He wanted Richie to whisper in his ear and call him all those pretty names he always dropped so casually, all those sweet ones and also ones that were a lot meaner. He wanted Richie to want him.

But it was easier to think about it than to ask for it. He knew Richie had way more experience than him. Well, okay, maybe not way more necessarily, but they were starting their third year of college, and he hadn’t wasted any time. Eddie, on the other hand, hadn’t done anything more than hand stuff with someone else. The guys he’d hooked up with were nice enough, and hot enough, but they just… weren’t Richie.

He supposed this guy on tumblr wasn’t Richie either, but at least he was everything else Eddie wanted. None of his hookups had been so, well, dominant, and that was this guy’s whole thing. He was dominant and a top and into guys that looked like Eddie. He even kind of talked like Richie, and he was apparently pining over his best friend, just like Eddie was. It had him completely smitten. Plus, internet-Richie’s crush had brown eyes like Eddie, and he ran track, just like Eddie did. Internet-Richie had posted once about his dick getting hard watching his friend at his track meet, and Eddie had come so hard that night, his track shorts around his ankles, imagining his Richie thinking those things about him.

Eddie was in bed now, in nothing but his boxers and one of Richie’s old shirts that had been Eddie’s for a while now. Still reeling from the way Richie had been acting that night, he logged into his porn account on his phone and scrolled through his dash for a grand total of thirty seconds before going immediately to internet-Richie’s blog. A thrill went through Eddie’s body when he saw that he had just posted. He’d written, “god my friends gonna fuckn kill me with that ass, i wanna plow him so bad” then reblogged it and added, “reminder that my asks and dms are always open if any pretty needy little subs need help getting off. please come be sluts in my messages.” Eddie’s breath caught in his throat when he saw that there was a picture, too, one of him gripping his hard cock, his boxers pulled down just enough for Eddie to see the dark hair around the base of his cock. Eddie moaned at the sight. His cock was so nice, so long and thick and pink. And fuck, his fingers. They were so long and slim, almost as nice as his-Richie’s.

Eddie scrolled a little farther down, his heart racing. There were a lot of reblogs, but some original posts here and there, things like, “what i wouldn’t do to have a pretty guy drooling all over my cock rn,” and, “in the mood to get someone dick drunk. wanna fuck a someone so hard they forget their own name.” One that made Eddie nearly choke said, “want someone i can pump my come into whenever i want, over and over again. want a sub i can keep full of my come all the fuckn time.” That post had Eddie getting out his lube.

It also had him thinking about internet-Richie’s most recent post, his post about his DMs being open.

Eddie bit his lip and thought about it. He’d sent internet-Richie some asks before from his porn blog (his blog didn’t have his name on it, just the teddy bear emoji, since he privately thought the teddy/Eddie rhyme was fun and clever, and also it was cute), and he’d seemed plenty happy enough to respond then. Still, it felt like a much bigger step to DM him, to talk to him just one on one. But the more he read his posts, the more he thought about his-Richie and how he’d touched Eddie that night, the easier it was to convince himself to shoot his shot with this stranger.

Eddie just messaged him a simple, “hi,” with a heart emoji. It was innocent enough, but his heart was still racing.

Internet-Richie responded a lot faster than Eddie was expecting. Honestly he hadn’t been expecting a response at all. But he said:

hiya cutie (; ive been hoping youd message me

Eddie flushed. He couldn’t help but hear cutie in his-Richie’s voice—especially given how often Richie used the nickname. really? he typed back.

fuck yes, ur cute little messages make me so hard. i can tell ur a pretty little thing just from the way you type

Eddie was blushing deep. Pretty little thing. That was hotter than it should’ve been. He wanted his Richie to talk to him like that, in that deep, sleepy voice.

there’s no way you can tell that from some messages :P, Eddie sent.

His heart stopped at the next messages internet-Richie sent.

oh, u dont think so?

why dont u send me some pics to prove me wrong (;

Oh my god, Eddie thought, his breath coming short. His head swam at the thought of sending this guy nudes, of showing himself off to someone who clearly wanted to see him, who would know how to take care of him and fuck him the way he liked, a guy with his crush’s fucking name and body type and hands. It had Eddie’s cock hard and leaking, and he slowly slid a finger inside of himself.

But just because the thought turned him on didn’t mean he was gonna send this stranger what he wanted so easily, even if he desperately wanted to.

you’d like that, wouldn’t you?

He fingered himself open as he waited for a response, working his way up to two fingers. It was nearly impossible to ignore his cock, but he didn’t want to come before the conversation even had a chance to start.

fuck ya i would, internet-Richie responded. Then, in a second message, whats wrong baby? you shy? ill show u mine ;)

Eddie's breath caught. God, this guy even made stupid shit sound hot, just like Eddie’s Richie. This was unreal.

i’ve seen yours, Eddie pointed out.

ya and you musta liked it if ur messaging me rn

Eddie bit his lip. ...maybe

aw thats cute sweetheart. u know i can see all the needy little tags you add when u reblog my stuff right?

Eddie blushed. He’d kind of always hoped he’d read them, but he never thought he actually did. i didn’t know you read those

oh ya, read them, jerk off to them. bit of a size queen, aren’t you? ;) it’s cute. makes me so fuckn hard when u talk abt how u want me to fill you up

Eddie whimpered out loud, sliding a third finger into himself. Fuck, he wanted that cock inside of him so bad. But right now one of his toys would have to do, once he was stretched out enough. He sped up his fingers, getting impatient. Gathering up all of his horny courage, he sent, show me.

what, no please? only good boys who use their manners get dick pics babydoll

Eddie pouted and whined to himself, making quick work of sliding his hot pink vibrator inside of himself—well, as quickly as he could without hurting himself. He moaned as it filled him up, making pleasure spread deep through his body. Slowly pumping it in and out, he reached for his phone. please, he typed, please let me see? wanna know what to picture while i fuck myself with my vibrator. He even added the wide eyed pouting emoji to really milk the whole begging thing. He knew he’d been playing a little coy, but now with the way internet-Richie was talking to him he was getting desperate.

well fuck baby since ur begging ;)

Eddie held his breath as he waited for the picture, slowly rocking his toy in and out, savoring the feeling. He wished it was Richie doing it, wished it was his cock. The lines between which Richie blurred; he wanted to get fucked by either of them, both of them.

What Eddie received when his phone lit up was not a picture, but a video. It was short, just a few seconds of Richie’s hand dragging wetly, smoothly over his cock, but it had Eddie drooling. The room was dark, so he’d used a flash, and it made the mix of what Eddie assumed was precome and spit glisten as the swollen head of Richie’s cock disappeared and reappeared from behind his fingers. Eddie must’ve played it at least five times, fucking himself a little faster, before remembering to say something back. And to take a video of his own. fuck, I want you so bad, want you to fucking ruin me, he wrote back. A part of him couldn’t believe how openly desperate he was being, but he found that he liked it; he liked the way it made him blush, he liked the way it felt to beg, to ask for what he wanted.

Richie’s response came fast: show me kitten. show me how you want me to fuck your pretty little ass.

Eddie moaned at the pet name; casual little nicknames were such a weakness for him. He was already so far gone, just picturing Richie’s cock inside of him, picturing him stroking his cock to thoughts of Eddie. The attention had his cock hard and leaking as he thrust his vibrator even deeper inside of himself, pumping it in and out a few more times before rolling over and getting on his hands and knees. It was hard to take a video from this angle, but he wanted to show off his ass and hide his face. Plus, there was something so hot about having his ass in the air and his face shoved in his pillow, looking like the perfect image of someone desperate to be fucked. He loved the way it made him feel, loved the thought of being so open for someone. For Richie.

He ended up shooting a short video as well, about ten seconds of him sliding his vibrator slowly in and out of himself, letting out soft little moans. He was pretty pleased with the way it turned out, his hole pink and smooth and wet as it stretched around his toy. The angle was a little weird, showing a lot of his room once or twice when his hand slipped a little, but overall he thought his ass looked amazing, if he did say so himself. He sent it and said, feels so good. do you want me to go faster?

As he sent it, he got settled on his back, forcing himself to go slow as he fucked himself while he waited for internet-Richie’s response. It was taking longer than before, and Eddie was getting antsy; it was so hard to drag it out, to not get ahead of himself. But whatever Richie was doing, Eddie knew it would be worth the wait. Still, he pouted as his cock ached, begging for attention.

He almost jumped out of his skin when he heard a knock at the door.

He groaned to himself and stayed put, fucking himself even slower as he waited for whoever it was to leave. But then the knocking continued, loud and incessant and obnoxious, and Eddie knew exactly who it was. He also knew he wasn’t going to go away any time soon, which honestly made him smile and blush. Richie had terrible timing, but Eddie would never be upset to see him.

Reluctantly, he slowly slid the toy out and pulled on his shorts, leaving his shirt off. He still had a pretty obvious boner, but his horny brain did not mind the idea of Richie seeing it. So he strode lazily down the hall, shouting a performatively annoyed, “I’m coming!” Finally, he opened the door, cocking his hip to the side and giving Richie an expectant look. “Can I help you?” he asked, a small smile dancing around the corner of his lips. He had to fight off a smirk at the wide eyed look Richie gave him as he ran his eyes over Eddie’s body.

“Fuck,” he muttered lowly, his eyes trained on Eddie’s cock, which was getting even harder the more Richie stared. Eddie bit his lip and grinned a little, making doe eyes at Richie. But Richie didn’t meet his gaze—instead he brushed past Eddie, his mouth still hanging open as he made his way urgently toward Eddie’s bedroom.

“Richie?” Eddie asked, a little let down that Richie’s hands weren’t all over him right now. But hey, if he was heading to Eddie’s bedroom he figured that was at least the right direction. He closed his front door and followed Richie into his room, where he found him staring at the bright pink vibrator on the bed. As confident and horny as Eddie was feeling, that still made him blush. He was only human. Crossing his arms, he said, bashful now, “I was kind of in the middle of something.”

Richie looked over at him, his cheeks bright red under his freckles. Then he got a glimmer of that trademark shit-eating grin on his face. “Eds, you fucking slut,” he said, sounding both delighted and breathless. “You are so fucking hot.”

Eddie flushed and tried not to squirm, but he couldn’t help but press his legs together, his eyes brightening. Fuck, was this actually happening? Shit, he needed to think of something witty to say. “You gonna do anything about it?” Okay, that kinda sounded like a corny porn, but he had to give himself credit for even being able to form words just after his lifelong crush and personal wet dream had just admitted his attraction to him.

“I think I already have been,” Richie said, still grinning.

Eddie cocked an eyebrow at him. He couldn’t help but smile back. “Oh yeah? How do you figure that?”

Eddie was expecting a confession. He was expecting something along the lines of you think I don’t notice how you look at me? or did you really think those were casual touches earlier? What he was not expecting was for Richie to unlock his phone and hold it up, showing Eddie the video he had just taken, the video he’d sent to internet-Richie.

Oh. Oh. Oh fuck.

“Oh my god, that’s you?” Eddie cried in disbelief.

“You’re telling me you didn’t recognize this dick?” Richie asked, swaggering over to Eddie, clearly enjoying himself.

“How did you recognize it was me?”

Richie nodded toward the Thundercats poster on Eddie’s wall, then to the model train that sat on his dresser. “What other guy has decor like that and the ass to match?”

Eddie grinned and shook his head. “That doesn’t even make sense.”

“Well pardon me for not being especially eloquent when I’ve just learned that the guy I’ve been masturbating to since I learned how to and been in love with for even longer has been masturbating to me too.”

Eddie’s eyes went wide, all thoughts of getting fucked leaving for a moment. “You’re in love with me?” he asked, his voice as soft as his smile.

Richie was not a bashful person, but the little laugh he let out just then was close to it. “Have been my whole life, but thanks for finally noticing.”

Eddie shook his head and stepped closer, until he had to crane his head up to meet Richie’s gaze. “I love you too.”

Richie’s eyes widened behind his thick frames. Eddie had only seen that look in Richie’s eyes a few times before, but he never wanted to lose sight of it again. He always wanted Richie to look at him like that. But then Richie was closing his eyes and leaning down. It only took Eddie a second to get with the program, drinking in the moment just a little longer before letting his own eyes fall shut as he pressed his lips against Richie’s.

It started gentle enough, if deep and passionate and intentional. But then Richie’s hands were on Eddie’s bare waist, skin against skin, and Eddie was gasping into Richie’s mouth, his hands coming up and resting against Richie’s chest. He curled his fingers into Richie’s shirt as Richie ran his tongue over Eddie’s lips, just before pulling away. He laughed at Eddie’s indignant little whine.

“Oh, you mean you don’t want me to take off my shirt right now?” he smirked as Eddie tried to pull him closer by the offending fabric. Huffing, Eddie conceded and let go long enough to let Richie pull the shirt off over his head.

“Oh,” he said softly, his voice a little, awed moan as he drank in Richie’s chest. It wasn’t like Richie had never been shirtless in front of Eddie before, but Eddie had never felt like he was allowed to really look at Richie all those times. But now he could; now he could touch. And he did, running his fingers over Richie’s smooth, warm skin, over his acne scars and blackheads and freckles. “Fuck, Richie,” he sighed before pressing his lips to Richie’s collarbones, trailing them all over Richie’s beautiful chest.

Richie gave a breathless, almost shy laugh as he stroked Eddie’s hair. “Damn, Eds, never pegged you as a tits guy.”

“Oh, fuck off,” Eddie giggled, bringing his lips back to Richie’s. They both smiled into it, getting lost for a moment as Richie’s hands slid slowly down Eddie’s sides. His hands lingered on Eddie’s hips for a moment before he slid them further down and grabbed at Eddie’s ass, making him gasp.

“Is that any way to talk to the guy who’s about to rail you ‘til you can’t walk?”

“What’re you gonna do about it?” Eddie asked with a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Spank me?”

“You’d like that, wouldn’t you?” Richie smirked. He gave Eddie’s ass a playful smack, making Eddie gasp again and fall into him, needing more. Richie’s voice was dripping with adoration as he purred, “Little brat,” and pulled Eddie against him, kissing him again. Eddie went with it easily and happily parted his lips to let Richie lick into his mouth. Richie had one hand gripping Eddie’s jaw and the other on his ass, touching him in a way that exuded a command Eddie was desperate to follow. God, Eddie knew Richie had big hands, but they felt huge on him like this. It was dizzyingly hot. And the way Richie’s tongue was teasing his had Eddie’s knees going weak. His dick was throbbing in his shorts, aching to finish what he’d started, what had been interrupted. When he thought about it all—about playing with himself for Richie, about the video Richie had sent him, about all those things Richie had said about filling Eddie up—he felt himself clench down on nothing, desperate to get fucked. Desperate to feel Richie’s cock so deep inside of him.

“Richie,” he whined into the kiss, pulling on Richie’s belt loops, “please.” He pressed himself urgently against Richie and rutted shamelessly against his thigh.

“Fuck, you’re a needy little thing, aren’t you?” His voice was cocky and teasing, but there was an apparent undercurrent of wonder there as well.

Eddie shoved his face into Richie’s neck and whined, grabbing onto Richie’s wrists without even knowing what his goal was. “Richie,” he whimpered, sounding pitiful and ruined already.

“What do you want, baby?” Richie’s voice made it clear that he was enjoying seeing Eddie this wrecked, and that just made Eddie even harder. “Come on, tell me, use your words.”

Eddie squirmed as Richie held him close, but still not touching him in any relieving way. “I need you inside,” Eddie said, his voice high and soft as he squirmed in Richie’s grip. “God, please, Richie, need you to fuck me. Fuck me so hard I can’t even think. Fuck me like I’m your little toy.”

Eddie could hardly believe the words coming out of his mouth, and judging by the gasp he heard Richie let out, he’d caught Richie off guard too. But if the hard bulge in his jeans that brushed up against Eddie was any indication, he was apparently just as turned on as Eddie was. Besides, Eddie knew from his blog that Richie was really into that sort of thing too—and, apparently, really into the idea of doing those things with Eddie. The realization that Richie had been saying all those filthy things about him had him grinding against him with even more fervor, kissing his neck with a heated confidence. Richie moaned, and Eddie could feel the warmth of it spreading through him. “Yeah, sweetheart? You want to feel me inside you? You think you’re ready for me?”

“Yes,” Eddie sighed, looking up at Richie with wide, desperate eyes. He shivered at the new look in Richie’s eyes, the blue nearly entirely eclipsed by how wide his pupils were. He looked hungry for Eddie; Eddie wanted to feel it. “‘M ready, Richie, please, so open for you.” He looked to the toy on his bed pointedly, but Richie only gave a deep laugh.

“Oh honey, that’s cute that you think that little thing is gonna have you ready for my cock.” Eddie’s breath caught; that toy wasn’t small. Before he could gather his scattered brain enough to react, Richie was scooping him up and tossing him on the bed, the toy falling forgotten to the floor. Richie moved Eddie onto his back, and Eddie went happily, pliantly. Richie’s fingers were cool against Eddie’s burning skin as he hooked his fingers into the waistband of Eddie’s shorts, slowly dragging them over his hips and down his legs, tossing them to the floor. Eddie’s cock was dripping with precome, his chest flushed a bright red as he squirmed under Richie’s gaze. Eddie been dreaming of Richie manhandling him like this for he didn’t even know how long; he couldn’t help the way he reacted. And he especially couldn’t help the pleased little sound he made when Richie murmured, “God, you’re gorgeous, Eds.” Then Richie was grabbing him by the ankles, gently but firmly spreading Eddie’s legs, and Eddie let out the most pathetic, genuine moan he’d ever heard. “Fuck, baby, you sound pretty. You like when I spread you open?” Richie asked. He was smirking down at Eddie, but Eddie could see how flushed he was, could see the thrilled awe in his dark, hungry eyes as Eddie nodded.

“Richie, please,” Eddie whimpered. “I need you so bad.” He sat up, reaching for Richie’s belt, but Richie easily pressed him back against the mattress with a large hand on the center of his chest. The confidence in Richie’s dominance took Eddie’s breath away, and he stayed right where he was, nice and obedient, as he watched Richie get off the bed and slowly undo his belt, then his button and zipper. He took his time dragging his jeans and boxers off, enough time to let Eddie’s eyes linger on the reveal of the dark hair under Richie’s waistband. Then Richie’s cock was bouncing up against his stomach, hard and flushed and fucking long. Eddie moaned at the sight and fisted the sheets underneath him. He wanted so badly to get his mouth on Richie, to breathe him in and be nice and good for Richie on his knees. But he was also desperate to get fucked; his hole clenched down on nothing at the thought, and then it was all he could think about again. “Richie,” he repeated, whining now as he reached for him. “Stop being such a tease.”

Richie laughed as he moved easily out of Eddie’s grip and climbed on top of him. Eddie gasped softly at the sight of Richie above him, his dark curls surrounding his face, his full, pink lips pulled into the most beautiful smile Eddie had ever seen in his life. He ran his hands over Richie’s chest and sides, marveling at the fact that this was really happening. Then, his eyes flickering down, he tentatively brought his hand to Richie’s cock.

“Oh, fuck,” they said, both at the same time, making them giggle together.

“Fuck, Eds, your pretty little hand looks so cute wrapped around my cock,” Richie teased in a low, rough voice. Eddie shivered; he couldn’t tell if Richie was praising him or degrading him, but either way it made his head fuzzy.

“‘M not that little,” Eddie grumbled out of habit. But he was clearly breathless. He’d never been good at pretending not to like Richie’s compliments, however teasing.

“Aw, but you are, baby,” Richie cooed, nuzzling his nose against Eddie’s and pressing a lingering kiss to his lips. “You’re so cute and tiny for me. I don’t even know if we’ll be able to fit my cock inside you.”

“I can,” Eddie whined, both indignant and impatient. He bucked his hips up, but Richie held him down. He gasped when he felt the warm, soft skin of Richie’s cock press against his stomach. Looking down, he saw that Richie had his cock lying on Eddie’s stomach, showing just how deep he would be once he was inside Eddie.

“You sure about that, babydoll?” While the teasing note was still there, Richie’s voice got noticeably softer as he said, “I don’t wanna hurt you.”

Eddie’s chest swelled at that. Cupping Richie’s face in his hands, he insisted, “I can take it.” Then he reached down and took Richie in his hand, glowing with pride when Richie let out a low moan. “Richie, please, I want you so bad.”

“Okay, baby,” Richie agreed, turning his head to kiss Eddie’s palm. “Fuck, I want you, too.” But he stalled. “Have you ever… like, been fucked before?”

Eddie flushed. “Well, not by someone else, but I have some toys. I’m not gonna break, Richie.” He huffed, but the way Richie was looking at him soothed any ruffled feathers.

“I’m your first?” His smile was soft, and while his eyes glittered, there was nothing teasing about his tone.

“I didn’t wanna do it with anyone else,” Eddie mumbled. He tried to look away, but Richie pulled him into a kiss.

“Fuck, I never thought you’d want me,” he chuckled. “Sorry, that was depressing, I just mean I can’t believe we didn’t do this sooner, you know?”

Eddie beamed, a small, giddy giggle dancing on his lips. “Well it’ll happen sooner if you stop talking so much.” But his smile, and all of the little kisses he planted on Richie’s freckled shoulders told Richie that Eddie never wanted him to stop talking.

“Alright, alright, sheesh, I know I’m hot but you don’t gotta rush me.” Eddie was still giggling when Richie kissed him, and he could feel that Richie was smiling too. “Where’s your lube?”

Eddie stretched his hand out and patted the bed for a moment, searching. After what was probably only four seconds but felt like an eternity, he finally found the bottle and handed it eagerly to Richie. “Oh, right,” Richie smirked, “you’re already wet for me, aren’t you?” Eddie moaned as Richie swiped his fingers over Eddie’s slick hole, pressing in just a bit. His fingers went in easily, and he pumped them slowly, drawing little, breathy moans out of Eddie. Richie’s fingers were a lot longer and thicker than his own, and they felt amazing, but they weren’t what he wanted in that moment.

“Richie, fuck me,” he whined.

“Aw, no please? Again?” Richie tsked and shook his head, curling his fingers against Eddie’s prostate, making him cry out. “I told you, sweetheart, only good boys who use their manners get fucked.”

“Please,” Eddie cried. He rocked his hips and grabbed at Richie’s shoulders, at his arms, not even sure what his goal was there other than to get Richie closer, to get his attention, to show him how desperate he was. “Please fuck me, please.” He sounded pathetic begging like this, but that just made him harder. And it made Richie’s pupils even wider as he slid his fingers out of Eddie and pressed a kiss to his lips.

“Good boy,” he purred. Eddie moaned and arched into Richie’s touch, but he only gave Eddie one more kiss on his cheek before pulling back and covering his cock in lube. Eddie watched, entranced, as Richie’s hand moved smoothly over his cock, glistening and slick. Then Richie was gently spreading Eddie’s legs even further and pressing the head of his cock against Eddie’s hole.

“Yes,” Eddie whimpered brokenly, grasping at the sheets beneath him. “Richie, please.” Meeting his gaze, he said softly, “I need you.”

“I’ve got you,” Richie assured him in a voice that made Eddie feel like he was glowing. Richie took Eddie’s hand in his and entwined their fingers, using his other hand to guide his cock inside of Eddie, who gasped at the feeling. God, he couldn’t believe this was happening. He couldn’t believe his first time was going to be with his favorite person. He couldn’t believe he was finally getting exactly what he wanted. Love flooded through him, warm and perfect, somehow both soothing and electrifying as he watched Richie’s face. Eddie’s mouth dropped as Richie pressed into him, deeper and deeper and still fucking deeper, until finally Richie let out a low moan and Eddie felt absolutely breathless. The stretch was intense, and he held onto Richie tightly as he caught his breath. “Are you alright?” Richie asked. His voice was strained, but the care and concern in it was clear. “You don’t have to take all of it if it’s too much.”

Eddie wanted to laugh at the remark or roll his eyes, but with how breathless and dizzied by pleasure he already was, he had to admit Richie had a point. “Just need a minute,” he gasped. Richie ran a soothing hand over Eddie’s skin, helping him even out his breathing and relax. The feeling of Richie’s cock twitching in anticipation inside of him had him letting out little moans as he adjusted, getting more and more used to the feeling until he felt comfortable enough to tell Richie he could move. Richie kissed him before he did, his lips soft against Eddie’s, a reassuring weight. Eddie breathed in sharply as Richie pulled back, grabbing at Richie’s shoulders.

Richie immediately stopped. “You okay, baby?” he asked, caressing Eddie’s face.

Eddie wanted to melt. Richie was always touching him, always jokingly flirting with him, but this unabashed concern and, well, love had previously been reserved for dire situations, like panic attacks or injuries. Eddie couldn’t help the dopey smile that bloomed on his face as he tilted his chin up and kissed Richie. “I’m okay,” he said breathlessly. “It’s just a little different from my vibrator.” They both gave a shaky laugh as Richie nuzzled his nose against Eddie’s.

“Better, I hope?” he grinned.

“Can’t tell yet,” Eddie retorted. Another snarky comment was on the tip of his tongue when Richie pulled his hips further back, effectively sucking all the air—and attitude—from Eddie’s chest. And then Richie was pushing back in, and Eddie let out a moan he couldn’t have faked if he tried, relaxing back into the mattress as his eyes fell shut. It was the best thing he’d ever felt, pleasure and relief flooding through his body. They’d been building up this tension for years; Eddie had figured it would feel good to break it, but it really felt magical, like something had just clicked into place. Feeling Richie inside of him, rocking his hips carefully, feeling Richie twitch as he tried not to lose control had Eddie’s head reeling. Eddie’s eyes fluttered open, focusing on Richie above him, on how flushed his face was. When Richie met his eye, pressing in deep, Eddie let out a small, “Fuck.”

“Yeah? Does that feel good, sweetheart?”

Richie was smirking as he said it, but there was something else sparkling in his eyes. Something giddy and awed. Something that made Eddie sigh dreamily, “I love you.”

Richie’s eyes widened for a moment before he pressed his lips firmly against Eddie’s, his hands roaming over Eddie’s body like he couldn’t choose where to put them, where to touch him. “I love you so much,” he beamed, pressing a few more kisses to Eddie’s cheeks. Eddie giggled at the feeling, but then Richie’s hips moved just a little faster, pressing him in just a little deeper, and he was back to melting under Richie’s touch, clinging to him as he rocked his hips with Richie’s. “Fuck, you’re so amazing, baby, so fucking beautiful. You look so good like this, holy shit.”

Eddie smiled almost drunkenly at Richie’s ability to ramble even when blowing Eddie’s mind. “Feels so good,” he moaned, his voice breathy and just a little bit higher than normal. He wrapped his legs around Richie’s waist. “Please, Richie, please.”

“Fuck, baby, wanna make you feel like this all the fucking time,” Richie groaned as he picked up the pace. Eddie whined in pleasure at the change, and that just spurred Richie to go faster, harder, until he was well and truly fucking Eddie, both of them moaning with every thrust.

“Oh my god,” Eddie cried, “ohmygodohmygodhmygod, oh fuck, Richie, please.” It felt so amazing, Richie fucking into him like this, but he needed that little bit more. His cock was throbbing desperately, achingly hard; he needed to feel Richie’s hand on him. “Richie, please,” he whimpered, “please, please touch me. I need you, I need you so bad, please, Richie.” Eddie was pouting now, grabbing aimlessly at Richie, his legs still wrapped tight around him.

“Fuck, you’re so hard for me,” Richie marveled, his voice sweet and condescending as he wrapped his hand around Eddie’s cock. Eddie nearly screamed at the contact, his back arching off the bed. Richie laughed a little, which just made Eddie even harder. The way Richie spread his precome over his cock, twisting his wrist just so as he stroked him had that familiar tension coiling in his lower stomach. “Aw, does that feel good? You gonna come on my cock, kitten?”

“Fuck, yes!” Eddie screamed. He gripped at the sheets as Richie stroked him, his voice washing over Eddie, mixing with the pleasure of Richie’s touch, of his thrusts. “Yes, yes, yes, please let me come, please, please, please.”

“That’s a good boy,” Richie purred, and Eddie could feel himself tipping over the edge at the words, at how low and affected Richie’s voice was. He groaned out, “Come on my cock like a good boy, princess,” and pure pleasure crashed over Eddie like a wave. He arched his back and cried out as he came, his moans filling the room as he squirmed under Richie, grabbed at him, at the sheets. It was fucking ethereal. He felt somehow so in tune with his body and yet so detached, like he was floating. He was barely cognizant of what Richie was saying, but when he put the sounds together and realized Richie had just said, panting, “Fuck, baby, gonna come,” Eddie felt like a live wire again.

“In me,” he said urgently. His mind was still a little too scattered for full sentences, but he knew what he wanted. God, he felt like he needed it. Like he needed to feel that connected to Richie. “Richie, come inside me, please.”

Richie apparently didn’t need to be told twice; he let out a moaned, “Oh, fuck,” before burying his face in Eddie’s neck, his breathy moans like music in Eddie’s ear. And then, as Eddie was coming down from his own high, he felt the holiest thing in the world: Richie’s cock, twitching inside of him, then his warm come filling Eddie up. It was unreal, being this close to him. Richie clutching at him as he came. It was even better than the little fantasies Eddie occasionally allowed himself. Richie was here, in his arms, pressing kisses to his neck as he caught his breath. Eddie was stroking his hair and rubbing his back as Richie nuzzled into him. Richie’s skin pressed against his skin, his legs wrapped around Richie’s waist, then falling to his sides, but still pressed to him. Still keeping him close. There wasn’t a single thought in his head that wasn’t about Richie.

Richie pulled him from his dreamy haze with light kisses pressed up his jaw, then over his cheeks. Eddie giggled at the onslaught of affection, still reeling from how fucking hot and euphoric what they had just done together had been. But he happily accepted Richie’s kisses, his heart bursting, then racing as Richie pulled back to look in his eyes. “Holy, fuck,” Richie beamed, his face flushed and blue eyes hooded from the weight of his orgasm, even as they sparkled.

“I know,” Eddie said, returning Richie’s grin as he basked in the surreality of having Richie on top of him, his dorky yet charming smile framed by lips that were red and swollen because of Eddie. His glasses were knocked askew, and Eddie instinctively reached up to fix them. With a sense of wonder, he realized that his touch was allowed to linger this time. He ran his fingers down Richie’s cheekbones, over his jaw, cupped his cheeks. “I love you,” he said. The words spilled out over his lips like he couldn’t stand not to say them. And while it made his heart race a little to say it out loud now that the adrenaline and tension was all worked through, it felt even better this time when Richie’s face softened and he nuzzled his nose against Eddie’s.

“I love you so fucking much.” Richie’s voice rarely got that soft, that sincere; it felt like a blanket wrapping around Eddie. It felt safe, secure. It felt like a promise. And if there was anyone in the world Eddie knew he could trust, it was Richie. That feeling of everything coming together came back to Eddie as he lay there under Richie, their lips moving together, feeling light as a feather now that everything was finally out in the open.