#fictional men are a problem

[himeofshyness]

Okay, so I’ve been gone for a few days because of work and the moment I finally finish everything and plan to enjoy my day off, I decide to take a nice long rest. But guess what? I end up having a freaking dream where I get isekaid, straight into my Farmer’s body. At that point, I just roll with it because honestly being isekaid sounds pretty cool.

Then out of nowhere Caldarus appears. He reaches for my hand, his touch sending a shiver down my spine.

"My beloved, you’re finally awake." His voice is deep, smooth...way too seductive for my sanity.

I freeze. Holy shit! He’s even more ethereal and majestic than I ever imagined, so much more than just a pixelated character on my screen.

Before I can say anything, he lifts my hand to his lips, pressing the softest kiss against my knuckles. "Have you truly forgotten me?" he murmurs, his gaze searching mine. "Or is fate merely testing me once more?"

I swear my brain short-circuits. WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING?!

"I… I don’t understand." I stammer.

His grip tightens just slightly, his thumb tracing slow circles over my wrist. "Then allow me to remind you." he whispers, leaning in. "Body, soul and eternity. I have only ever belonged to you."

And that’s when I absolutely lose it. Oh my god. Is this a sign that I need to update my story since I have the day off?!

Now before you think I’m making this up or just being delusional, this is real. The last time I had a dream like this was back in 2020 when I dreamt about my OC self getting married to a Countryhumans character. I even made a whole comic about it!

[kazutora-kurokawa]

Can I ask for a first time (iykyk) with tenjiku? Where reader is a bit shy at first but man she kinky af on the insideee

Tenjiku x Shy!Virgin!->Kinky!Reader

♡ NSFW, fem reader, fluff kinda, virginity loss obviously, virgin!Shion, soft sex -> kinky shit, rough sex/manhandling, overstimulation, creampie/breeding kink, cum play/cum drinking, daddy kink, saliva/spit play, tongue kissing, size kink/belly bulging, degradation, biting ♡

Characters: Izana, Kakucho, Ran, Rindou, Mucho, Mochi, Shion, Hanma

note: anon you ate real bad with this idea, I'm so sorry I procrastinated so hard with this 😭 I should be ashamed of myself fr

edit: added Hanma for @sayaka-ur-cutie

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Izana (breeding kink)

🎴 Izana is surprisingly gentle at first, he wants to make your first time as pain free as possible. But as soon as he feels you thrusting your hips against his and basically fucking him back, he's gone, eyes rolled back and everything (I believe in extra sensitive!Izana). It also didn't help that you were whining for him not to pull out, the mere thought of cumming inside you had him seeing stars. He spent the rest of the night fucking, filling, and overstimulating you.

Kakucho (cum play)

🩷 Kakucho literally makes the sweetness love to you, and it's not until after that he finds out how freaky you really are. After he pulls out and takes the condom off, he's shocked (and aroused) to see you take it out of his hand and raise it to your lips, swallowing every drop of his cum from it. He's standing there for a solid minute or two just staring at you before finally mustering up the courage to politely ask you if you want more.

Ran (daddy kink)

💜 Ran knows it's your first time, so he's going nice and slow with you...up until you call him daddy. He doesn't even say anything, he just smirks because he knew you were an undercover freak. He starts going slower, trying to make you whine and beg for him. He'll only speed up again if you call him daddy again though.

Rindou (spit play)

🩵 Rindou loves the way you hide your face when he starts fucking you, he thinks it's cute that you're so shy. You're a lot less shy by the time he finds the perfect rhythm though, your hands roaming all over his body as he pounds into your pussy. Eventually your hands find their way to his hair, tangling in his locks and pulling him into a kiss. He thinks it's just a sweet little kiss and it was, until you slipped your tongue in his mouth. He just couldn't help but moan into the kiss before sliding his tongue into your mouth in return. And he definitely picked up on the way you clenched around him when his spit mixed with yours and started dripping down your lips and chin. He found your weakness, so expect him to exploit it to the fullest extent from now on.

Mucho (size kink)

💙 Mucho didn't think much of it when you mentioned how big he was, he knew you were just stating the obvious and probably a little nervous since you were a virgin. But when he kept hearing you say it in between the occasional moan or whimper while he was fucking you, that's when he realized just how much the difference in size turned you on. And he definitely didn't mind, if anything he started doing things to make the size difference more obvious. He grabbed your thighs and pressed your legs closer to your body, making you bend in ways you didn't know you could. He manhandled you, touching you with more force to show off his strength. But his new favorite thing was pressing his hand against the prominent bulge in your tummy, chuckling softly as you moaned and writhed in pleasure underneath him.

Mochi (degradation)

🍡 Mochi knew it was your first time, so he was extra careful not to hurt you...physically anyways. You just looked so cute underneath him, he couldn't help but tease you a little. Whispering dirty praises in your ear, telling you how good of a slut you were for him. He'd totally understand if you weren't into it, but the smile on his face when he felt your pussy gripping him tighter gave away the absolute delight he felt in knowing that you were just as nasty as him.

Shion (biting)

♥️ Shion took his sweet time when he took your virginity, mainly because he was a virgin too and wanted your first time together to be special. He gently thrusted in and out of you with his face buried in the crook of your neck, planting soft kisses all over. All his gentle efforts went out the window when he felt your teeth sinking into his shoulder though. He had an almost visceral reaction to the bite, letting out a gasping moan and gripping your thighs tighter as he slowed down his thrusts, trying desperately not to cum inside you. He didn't know how to react, so he did what his body told him to and gently bit you back, his dick twitching inside you as he heard you let out a soft whimper. You two spent the rest of the night in each other's arms, fucking gently and nipping at each other's skin.

Hanma (rough sex)

🏵️ Hanma knew you were a virgin and was fully prepared to be gentle with you, at least at first. As soon as he bottomed out in you he knew damn well he wasn't going to be gentle the entire time. And your soft moans and the way you begged him to go harder only spurred him on. By the end of the night he was balls deep in your pussy with no intentions of ever being gentle in the bedroom again.

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Taglist

@arlerts-angel @i-literally-cant-with-this @trevengersprincess @giugiette @katkusuo @happy-trenchcoated-impala @drunkcheesecake @darkstarlight82 @reiners-milkbiddies @manji-hoe

[downfall0fman]

Having a crush on two characters with the voice actor is crazy, really shows off that I have a type

“ah yes, the octave, perfect”

[ravenbats]

I'll just leave this here

[mairos-comet]

Tohmas April fools day line.

🫣😍😊

[angel-fruitcake]

how it feels to be a bottom!cas enjoyer in a fandom full of top!cas truthers

[astarionmylife]

I'm really starting to question my obsession with sarcastic superhuman immortals (usually with trauma).

edit: i added lucifer

double edit: I added supernatural Crowley (don't judge me 😭)

[azula-hates-men]

bryke can validate pro-colonialism arguments in the comics and it's ignored (sometimes even defended) by the atla fandom, but if i ship zutara i'm calling for the recolonization of my people.

[pirateshelly]

Sometimes it's entertaining for me to imagine what the shared alternate reality the "it's actually groundbreaking and unheard of for a show/movie to care about MEN and their FEELINGS and other MEN without making it GAY!" crowd and the "it's actually revolutionary when a piece of media "allows" it's female protagonist to be strong AND feminine and not a big ugly mannish dyke" crowd must live in looks like. Oh to live in a world where the media landscape is completely inundated with nothing but butch lesbian heroes and men who start immediately having steamy gay sex with each other the second they make eye contact

[mapleandgingeroatmeal]

In the Alfield gnoll mines Nott says “Why are all you big men making these weird speeches to me??” And I still marvel at the fact that that line was rp’d by a guy because god do I ever relate to that sentiment.

[annabelle--cane]

Wasn’t Jon giving up control over himself and his actions to a ‘god’ his entire fucking problem. I.e, not taking ~~accountability~~. Why the fuck you would think that he would benefit from a “”program“” that requires him to do that with a different one in the first place is beyond me.

yes that's the joke. the joke is that jon has a massive complex around seizing and ceding control where he flips flops back and forth between feeling like he's powerless and desperately trying to prove that he's not powerless by making the first active choice available to him, and so trying to follow a program where the literal first step is "accept that you have no control" would be Bad for him no matter where he was on his "I'm powerless/I'm uniquely culpable" rotation.

I think you're taking away the idea that that was a pro twelve step post? it's not, I'm not saying that this is a Good Thing that jon would simply be too bad at self-care to accept, the point is that twelve step programs are super super not suited for everyone even though they're usually the first and most easily accessible port of call for addiction support groups. the framing of "I keep wanting to say this thing" is mostly just a set up for the rest of the joke.

[thisis-mairo-whodis]

Rough sketch of an idea I had couldn’t get it out of my head even after Valentine’s Day.

So hopefully this has sated this thought for now. Man I wish I could draw better or have a tablet.

[nyarlathotep-thecrawlingchaos]

My brain was already rotted.

Now it's borderline leaking out of my ears.

Goddammit I did not need another One Piece himbo to fixate on, fuck absolutely all of the Arabasta arc because

Sir WHYYYYYY 😭😭

Artist credit link: How absolute fcking dare

Artist credit link: Help me I'm dying

I'm pretty sure once I actually reach Cross Guild in the manga I'm going to just bleed out from a profuse Sanji-esque nosebleed

And yes this means I will probably be writing Sir Crocodile very soon as well

Fucking bullshit honestly I hate him but I love him but

Stupid dramatic dipshit 😒

[unfortunately-obsessed]

Saying that the man that is stuck with a symbol of oppression and persecution on his skin is "dramatic" for having a problem with a literal suppression/enslavement tool that sides as a collar is... Insane.

[mairos-comet]

Saw someone else’s do this and wanted to make one.

Umm so yeah don’t come at me for my likes or…umm dislikes.

[the-self-indulgent-corner]

Genshin characters x a reader with ADHD!

Summary: Your ADHD is odd, however, your (boy)friend is just as strange, so you think it evens out.

Or, how the genshin characters react to a reader with ADHD. (Ft some lesser known aspects of ADHD)

Featuring: Tighnari, Venti, Xiao & Albedo. Can be read as romantic or platonic.

A/n: it's frankly criminal how few neurodivergent reader content there is out there so here I am.

Disclaimer!! While I do have ADHD nobody’s ADHD is the same, so what might be common for me is something another person has never experienced.

Also I drop some lesser known aspects of ADHD in this post so here’s a general index of what those terms mean. It’s a lot more nuanced than what I’ve written down here but it’ll give you a general idea of the concept!

Index:

Executive dysfunction/ADHD paralysis: Wanting to do your job/work, but it feels like you’re physically unable to.

Food sensory issues/selective eating habits: A lot of people with ADHD are ‘picky eaters’ and refuse to eat certain foods even if it's good for them. Usually we pick foods with high sugar since it causes a ‘dopamine surge’.

Auditory processing disorder (APD): Having difficulty making out what someone is saying or processing what someone said too slowly.

Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD): Being much more sensitive to rejection or perceived rejection.

Verbal stim: Exactly the same as other stims (Like bouncing your leg or clicking a pen) but just with words. Usually being a certain phrase, sentence, or humming. Although any vocalization can be a verbal stim.

Tighnari

Probably the most knowledgeable about this out of everyone on this list.

He knows it's not just 'lose your focus fast' and that ADHD is a lot more nuanced than that but at the same time he isn't an expert on it.

You'll have to explain some things to him, and knowing Tighnari, he'd happily let you tell him.

Mf takes notes. If he gets too excited and overwhelmes you tell him so he'll calm down a little lmao

Downside of him knowing a lot about (your) ADHD is that he knows when you need to cut back on some things.

If you're a very picky eater like me and don't like the taste/texture of healthy food he will literally not allow it LMAO

You'll be eating an excessive amount of sugar and he'll literally snatch whatever is in your hands and tell you to eat something healthy instead. And no, you cannot convince him to give it back to you until further notice.

If you hate the texture of actual healthy food he’ll definitely find an alternative for you to eat no matter how long it takes. You are not getting out of this.

In the nicest way possible… Tighnari is probably a little annoyed about your ADHD sometimes 💀💀💀

He never blames you or gets mad at you because he knows it's not your fault when this does or doesn't happen but he's still a bit miffed about it lmao.

Like when your auditory processing disorder suddenly kicks in and you make him repeat himself ten times. Or how you space out during his lectures.

However, Tighnari is smart so he'd definitely find a way to gain your attention so when he tells you things you can actually pay attention.

He's pretty good at wrangling your executive dysfunction, too (he's used to Collei having similar problems when he's tutoring her). He believes in the work/reward system and he always knows what'll make you actually get up to do what you're supposed to.

Usually by using your current hyper fixation/interests against you LMAO

"Do that assignment/task and I'll take you out to get that merch you've been wanting for over a month."

"YOU WILL!?"

(If you like soft things like his ears, he would absolutely use it as bait for you to do your work also LMAO)

But if it's a really rough day he knows when to dial back on his constant nagging for you to do your work and encourages you to take it easy for the day.

If you're like me and forget things semi-regularly he'd always remind you. Especially if it's an outing/meeting with someone.

(Although, if you're the type of person to get annoyed by it he'll stop/dial it back if you ask.)

You 🤝 Tighnari

Can be overstimulated by loud noises easier than others.

Seriously though you both are at a loud party or something and look over to each other giving each other the 'why are we here? Just to suffer'? Look.

But if either of you are about to/are overstimulated you leave the area with each other to calm down. It's sweet 💖

He was originally a bit annoyed by how easily your mind wandered or how quickly you jumped from topic to topic but got used to it after a while. It even grew on him, he finds it endearing nowadays.

Always loves to hear you talk about your hyper fixation, seeing you so happy makes him happy too.

(And you best believe you'll be listening to that boy's flower talk. You think you know more than most rangers about the flora in Teyvat than they do. He's cute though, and you love hearing him talk about it as well, so really it's a win-win scenario.)

Mean this in the nicest way possible, but.. Tighnari is probably going to make you feel really bad once or twice on accident LMAO

With this tough love nature and your Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria you sometimes can't tell when he's being sarcastic/playful and/or he didn't mean what he said (or simply didn't understand.)

He almost always realizes right away and reassures you he meant no harm, and you believe him, but you're understandably still a bit upset LOL

He always makes it up to you, though <3

And if you ever get mad at yourself about how easily you get upset he's always there to reassure you that it's okay and you shouldn't bash your emotions like that, even if they're irrational.

He's your free therapist /j

Was originally confused when you started verbally stimming around him before you explained that to him as well. As long as it's not unexpectedly loud, he doesn't mind it and if you ever stop for a long period of time he def gets a bit upset 💀 like 'why'd you stop?? Did something happen??'

And if you stim in a way that hurts you he definitely puts a stop to it right away. Usually by offering you alternative ways to stim in ways that don't make you hurt yourself.

He is your mom (boy)friend <3

“I knew it. This place is way too loud for you as well, isn't it? C'mon, let's go out for a bit.”

Venti

"Oh you mean like the thing where you can't sit still?"

Hit him.

But really, Venti doesn’t quite understand what ADHD is all that much. He’s heard the term before but never really cared to figure out what it means. You’ll have to educate him on it before he understands.

Honestly he’s kind of surprised at how much more there is to ADHD than he originally thought. Like damn your brain works against you like that?? You deal with that DAILY?? Damn bitch you live like this? /lh

… But also he unironically kind of finds it funny.

“I can’t believe your brain will go to such lengths to not do work just because it doesn’t like it.”

“Shut up.”

Sorry, but Venti is a tease at heart and he cannot hold himself back. Although, if he sees you genuinely upset by what he said he’ll apologize.

Despite that Venti is actually really good at helping you if you need it. He never gets annoyed if he has to repeat himself a dozen times or if he has to help you get something done, or if he has to calm you down for any reason.

If your ADHD is keeping you from falling asleep Venti always offers to sing you to sleep, it’s up to you if you decide to accept or not. (He’ll be very pouty if you decline though lol)

If you're like me and have lost items right in front of you (once I lost an item I was looking for for a good fifteen minutes. It was in my hand.) Venti can and will tease you about this.

"Hmm~ I don't know… Where did you see it last?" You could basically hear the laugh in his voice.

Once you do find it in a really obvious spot he will then laugh out loud. Just joke about breaking up with/leaving him and he'll quickly be on his knees apologizing

If one of your vocal stims is humming/singing anytime Venti catches wind of it he's definitely singing along with you. It turns into a karaoke in seconds and you're both laughing and smiling by the end of it.

He’s surprisingly one of the most understanding people on this list. No matter what, he'll always be there for you and somehow always knows how to help. You asked him about that and he said,

“Well, a magician can never reveal their secrets.”

“You’re not a magician, though. You’re a bard.”

“Then how is it that I stole your heart?”

Hit him again /j

Although there is one aspect he’s not great at steering you away from only because he’s also bad at steering himself away from it.

Impulsive tendencies.

Did you impulsively buy something? What a coincidence. Venti did something similar just seconds ago. Did you leave the group you were with because something caught your eye? Venti is right beside you, also looking for whatever caught your attention. Did you say something without really thinking about it? Venti just did the same somewhere across the room.

You guys are almost in sync for impulsive decision making no matter how far apart you two may or may not be.

On multiple occasions you’ve both run to each other in a panic after you both impulsively did something you shouldn’t have.

“Venti, help! I just entered a competition I know nothing about and it starts tomorrow afternoon!”

“Y/n, help! I just promised I’d do something I definitely shouldn’t!”

You both look at each other in panic and internally scream.

Xiao

Unlike Venti, Xiao hasn’t the slightest clue what ADHD is. He literally has no concept of mental disabilities and genuinely just thought some people had a harder time with things, not that their brain is wired differently.

Before you tell him he’ll see you stimming sometimes or notice you say certain words or phrases multiple times and just shrugs it off as ‘human things’. Same could be said for most of your ADHD shenanigans.

It was a blessing and a curse since he wouldn’t judge you for any of them, however if something like your executive dysfunction kicked in he’d probably think you’re being lazy 💀💀

You’d have to have a long sit-down talk about your ADHD and everything that goes on with it before he understands and can help you with it.

Even if you’re like me and your explanation skills are about as clear as muddy water he’d likely at least get the gist of it.

Now listen, Xiao is a harsh person by nature but once you tell him about your rejection sensitive dysphoria and what it means he’s probably looking back on anytime he was even slightly mean to you and worrying about if he accidentally hurt you.

Reassure him that even if he did hurt you, it’s in the past now and he knows to do better now.

Boy is much softer to you after that talk, even if he won’t admit it. He's the one least likely to accidentally hurt you with words out of everyone.

Xiao didn’t- and frankly, still kinda doesn’t- know a lot about humans before he met you, so he’s learning as he goes. Which means that at the beginning he’s going to be really awkward with comforting/helping you.

He’s trying though! And if you tell him how to help either before or after something like your executive dysfunction starts acting up, he’ll… still be a little awkward, if i’m being honest, but it helps much more than before you told him anything. The more he gets used to your ADHD the easier it’ll be for him to help you with it.

It becomes easier over time for both of you and Xiao slowly grows a ‘sixth sense’ if something is wrong.

Forgot something at the house? Xiao is already handing it to you as you turn around to go and grab it. Impulsive did something you probably shouldn’t have? Xiao is suddenly there to calm you down and do damage control. Your brain suddenly refusing to process what someone said? Xiao breaks down what they said so you can fully process it.

Seriously, bring him grocery shopping with you. He'll remember things you didn't even put on the list.

You wonder how Xiao got this power and Xiao also wonders how he got this power but he isn’t complaining. If he can help you in any way, he will.

"Hey, you forgot your lunch. I don't want you going hungry while I'm gone..."

Tease him about how he's acting like a caregiver and watch him turn red.

Albedo

He didn't know much about ADHD before he met you if he was being honest.

He knew more than Venti and Xiao but less than Tighnari, so you won't have to explain as much as you did with the previous two!

He finds it very intriguing, although he is the chief alchemist and human psychology has little to nothing to do with that, he finds himself listening to everything you have to say about it.

He knew humans learned in different ways but he didn't know how nuanced all of it was.

Just like Tighnari this guy is taking notes, although he's a bit calmer than Tighnari was lmao

"Fascinating. I knew humans were complex creatures, but this is much more nuanced than I originally anticipated."

Just like with Xiao, even if your explanation skills are less than ideal, Albedo still gets what you mean.

Seriously, he will pry every detail that you know about it out of you to the point that the conversation has already passed three hours and neither of you noticed.

He's asking questions you didn't even think of and you've known you've had ADHD for years.

Unfortunately, you often have to disappoint him with the fact that there's not exactly an abundance of information on mental illness/disabilities and that he'd likely have to find out for himself.

Even after that Albedo still asks you questions about your ADHD sometimes which you can either quickly answer or it takes ten minutes of pondering to figure it out.

He waits for you tho <3

You 🤝 Albedo

What the fuck is a social cue

You're usually at least a little better at spotting them than Albedo is, but it's still something you both struggle with 💀💀💀

Difference is that while you may try to apologize, Albedo just doesn't care.

He lives on a cold mountain, it's only natural that he has bad people skills. (He just like me fr fr)

In the nicest way possible the first few times you impulsively make a decision/have Executive dysfunction/etc Albedo will definitely say smthn like, "Oh, so this is what it looks like." 💀

Mf is lucky he's cute.

Afterwards though he'll help in any way he can. Which, of course means, any way alchemy can.

You're surprised at how useful all the things he made for you are, and you're grateful for that man making them for you every day.

All of Albedo's previous note-taking and observations of any bad habits you have because of your ADHD ended up with him being able to handle your bad habits better than you can 💀

Buddy is too smart for his own good.

You're taking notes from him at this point. You'd be a little offended that he knows more about your mental disability than you do but honestly if it helps you manage it better you'll take it with open arms.

While you're in his laboratory he likes hearing about you info dump about your hyper fixation. It's better background noise than the howling winds outside and you look adorable while talking about it. That's a win-win for him.

(Although like Tighnari, you'll also hear about his own experiments. Even if you're not really processing the information Albedo appreciates that you're trying)

If you're more creatively inclined he'll occasionally ask for your help if he's stuck on a project to see if you can think of something he hasn't yet. Even if you don't he says your input helps (translation: he likes hearing your voice and opinions)

Out of everyone on this list he's the least baffled about your odd habits. Man's is so unbothered by everything it's kinda funny.

The only thing he's worried about is when you look after Klee alone… he trusts the both of you to be able to take care of yourselves, but Klee is impulsive by herself. And if you're also impulsive it could lead to tragedy.

"You're aware the acting grand master is trying to stop Klee's habit of fish blasting, correct?"

"Well, maybe the acting grand master should try fish blasting herself! It's not our fault it's so fun!"

You're not allowed to babysit anymore

Ending note: I'm so bad at hcs it's also kinda funny. Ah oh well, at least you can say I tried! Sorry if anyone was ooc but also this is MY blog and I GET TO CHOOSE how to portray characters!!1! Also if there are any spelling or grammar mistakes no there isn't.

I was planning on adding more characters but kinda ran out of steam lmao. Mayhaps I will one day, but for now this is all you get <3 bye~