#filed » conversations / why don't you ever think before you speak?

[lostinforestbound]

Hi! Could I request hcs from you on Rolan being jealous?

Absolutely! I had fun exploring this topic, so I hope you enjoy! This will be Rolan and a GN!Tav. To the people reading, Please feel free to add on to this and share your ideas!

Rolan and Jealousy

In Rolan's opinion, Jealousy is an improper and ugly thing to have; it sounds hypocritical when he gets jealous of a lot of things himself.

It's instinctive; his life has never been fair to him, and he never got to have what a lot of others do. It's deep rooted into his insecurity.

Loving parents? He wanted that, as his own family abandoned him. Food on the table? He wanted that too, why did he deserve to starve? Wizard Schooling? As an orphan, he never stood a chance of getting into one. No matter though, he doesn't need schooling! He's a prodigy!

Gods, he knows he shouldn't be jealous at all anymore, he will have everything he could ever want soon. It's unbelievably petty.

This jealousy starts extending towards Tav without him meaning to.

When they start taking interest in someone else, even if it's a simple conversation, his mind trails into the thought "That should be me."

As much of a loud, prickly person he is, he surprisingly says nothing about it. Instead is stews in his heart ready to burst, but he keeps it together.

Why is he so jealous if they're not even his partner? It's absurd and childish. Especially since he is unworthy of their attention. Once he has everything to provide for Cal and Lia, then he'll be worthy.

If Tav and him are together, it is a different story.

His jealousy is still quiet, but they notice how he holds their hand tighter when they speak to certain people. How his tail wraps around their calf. How he glares when other people decide to flirt with them.

Once he works on his own insecurity and Tav's reassurance that he's the only one for them, his jealousy starts fading away to nothing.

That doesn't stop him from playfully stealing them away from their companions with a "fuck off, they're mine".

Writing Blurb

When did he become such a prickly, bitter person? When, at some point of his life, did he become so jealous? Why is he so jealous of Tav, of all bloody people? Is it because they're a savior? That they saved his siblings where he couldn't? He should be grateful!

So why is he bitter, even though they saved everyone, including himself? Is he truly this entitled?

He doesn't see them approach him as he stews in his own thoughts. Usually he's not this insecure with himself, but he feels unworthy of them. He doesn't deserve them, not yet. The tower is not truly his, he has to refurnish everything to make it all of their homes. Cal and Lia love it so far, but there's still so much to be done.

Files need to be organized. All of the dealings fall on his shoulders now thanks to Lorroakan's demise. There's so much to do so he cannot truly have them yet-

His thoughts stop short when Tav kisses his cheek. "You're still dealing with these people? Don't you think it's time for a break?"

He subconsciously leans into the touch but stops when he realizes they pulled away. "I can't yet. There's too many-"

"You can do it later. Come have tea with me, or would you prefer some wine?"

He waves a dismissive hand, staring back down at the mess of papers in front of him. "I can't, Tav, they're all-"

A hand comes to his face, gently but firmly turning his head towards theirs. They don't say say anything at first, looking him straight into the eyes which makes him shut up instantly. He knows that determined look too well, and his mouth goes dry.

"You know I love you very much, right?" Before he could speak up, they continue on, "I'm already impressed with you. I don't need you to work yourself to death to prove you want to make this work. I love it here, and I love you. You shouldn't have to 'prove' anything to anyone, especially not to me."

"You're a savior-" Finger press to his lips before he finishes.

"I couldn't have done that without your help. Your arcane cannon saved my life that day. I thought I was done for until I called for your help," They state, pressing a kiss to his jaw then lips, "You're more than enough for me. Now, how about some reading and wine?" He closes his eyes briefly before that playful smirk returns, looking up at them. "I suppose if you want me to read to you that badly, I shall."

[mysecretlittlelibrary]

Secrets That Whisper & Shout

Pairing: Moonknight trio (Steven mainly) x Reader

Word Count: 3.9k

Warnings: idk brief mentions of violence

Genre: fluff & minor angst

Summary: you are extremely intrigued by your neighbor and the voices you can sometimes hear in his head because of course your neighbor seems extra susceptible to your powers

***

It's an interesting way to live life, being able to see into people's minds. To alter their memories, control their actions, hear their deepest inner thoughts even if you're not trying to sometimes. It can be weird but you just try your best to live your life normally. Right now the biggest hindrance to your delicate balance of normal is your neighbor. He lives across the hall for you and unfortunately, for some reason, you keep finding yourself inside his mind. It happens when you let your mental guard down for a little too long. You've always compared people's minds to houses, or offices full of filing cabinets, your powers give you a key basically but it seems like your dorky neighbor's mental door is never closed let alone locked.

The weirder part is what you hear when you do find yourself in his mind. For most people, the voice in their head sounds like them- and while you've never really spoken to your neighbor, you know for a fact there's no way he's simultaneously a nervous Brit, a cocky American, and a grumpy Spanish speaker. There are three voices in his head as opposed to one, they speak to each other and seem entirely independent of one another. You haven't intentionally done any snooping in his mind but you can imagine his mental filing cabinets are entirely different than any you've been in. It's not really your business though so you never look into it. No matter how curious you are about how and why he has three voices in his head. 

You know very little about your neighbor. From accidentally listening to his mental debates you think his name is Steven. The other voices have names too but you're unclear who is who because you've never stuck around long enough to discern that. He's not very social and only leaves his apartment for work or errands. He hardly ever takes phone calls and he never really calls anyone- except, around the time you moved in he used to call his mom pretty often but you think she never answered and eventually, those calls stopped. The strangest detail you've realized is sometimes he'll sneak out of his apartment, through the window and you have no idea where he goes or what he does but he's always back within a week. You don't mean to keep tabs on him, sometimes you cast your magic out to scan for threats and you'll notice the lack of presence in the apartment across the hall.

He's a curious case, your neighbor across the hall, and today you've decided you're going to bite the bullet and speak to him. Your curiosity about him is the main reason and you hope that being able to assign personhood to the voices you hear will quell it even a bit. You cross the hall and knock on his door confidently before you can convince yourself not to on one Saturday afternoon when you know he's home. You checked first. There's some shuffling on the other side of the door and eventually, it opens a bit hesitantly but it opens.

"Hi! My name is y/n. I live across the hall from you." You say, your chosen tone is friendly but soft.

"I'm- Steven. Can I help you?" He asks sizing you up.

"I hope so! I was baking cookies and even though I went to the store before I started I guess I didn't make a complete list of things I needed because it turns out I actually don't have enough sugar so I was just wondering if you had any I could borrow by chance?" You ask. You are baking, but you also definitely have enough sugar, it just seemed like the simplest way to initiate conversation. A bit cliche but it's a classic for a reason.

"You want to borrow sugar?"

"Yes. A cup if you have it." You hold up your measuring cup with a smile. Steven pauses for a moment before he answers.

"Sure. I've got some. Come on in I'll pour some for you." He says walking into his apartment. You follow him in glancing around. The studio style flat is full of books littered everywhere, it's the first thing you notice when you walk in. Steven takes the measuring cup from you and quickly grabs his container of sugar to pour some.

"Thanks so much! I'll bring by some cookies to repay you!" You tell him.

"Oh, no thank you. I appreciate the offer but I am vegan and I'm sure you don't intend to bake vegan-friendly cookies so-" He trails off with a shrug. You frown but make a note of the information. He's vegan. "I've never seen you before." He says after a moment while he puts up his bag of sugar.

"That's probably because you don't leave much besides for work. I've lived across you for over a year." You muse.

"Hey! I- I leave!" He turns to look at you.

"To do your laundry at the witching hour when you're the least likely to run into people?" You smirk a bit at him.

"No." He huffs.

"Thanks for the sugar, Steven. Hope to see you around more." You toss over your shoulder as you walk back into your apartment.

You do make a handful of vegan cookies for your neighbor, even though it wasn't your plan, after checking to find that it really is just a couple of minor changes, vegetable oil instead of butter, water or nondairy milk instead of eggs, and since you don't already have vegan chocolate you leave out the chocolate chips- at least according to the recipe you found. They're basically sugar cookies and you only make six for Steven, some of which you sprinkle with cinnamon to make up for their plainness, but you imagine they're a decent thanks for the sugar you borrowed- even if it was a ploy.

A couple of hours later, you knock on Steven's door again, this time with a small Tupperware container for the cookies you made him. He opens it again with the same confused frown after a few moments.

"Hi again! I know you said not to bother with the cookies because you're vegan but I wanted to say thanks anyway so- I adjusted my recipe to accommodate. They're sugar cookies except two of them are cinnamon, I wasn't sure if you like cinnamon so I didn't make them all cinnamon but the cookies are vegan. So, thank you, for the sugar." You say handing him the plastic container.

"You adjusted your recipe so that I could have some cookies?" Steven doesn't seem to believe the words even as he says them.

"Yes. I know you said I didn't have to bring any but I wanted to anyway. Since I did use your sugar to make them."

"Thank you. I appreciate the effort. I can't wait to try them."

"If you ever need anything, just knock." You tell him and wait for his cautious nod. "I'll be seeing you." You say leaving without waiting for him to agree with that statement. From then on, Steven does in fact make a point to speak to you more often. The first time is a couple of days later, he runs into you in the elevator and tells you he enjoyed the cookies. He'll definitely speak to you when he sees you around the building but it's on you to actually make plans if you want to see him otherwise and sometimes you do. You invite him out to lunch, have him over for tea, suggest movies to watch together, you even visit him at work every once in a while. The first time you went to his job you didn't even know he worked there, I mean he'd told you he worked at a museum but you never thought to ask which one, but once you knew he worked there you definitely made a point to pop in and say hi when you're around and he's working. It takes a while but you manage to build a pretty good friendship with him over the next few months to the point where you're hanging out a couple of times a week these days. In fact, he's supposed to be over later today to show you some movie he's been dying for you to see. For now, you're sitting on your couch reading a novel until he gets here. It'll be another few hours before he comes knocking at your door. 

You've really enjoyed getting to know him, more than you expected to honestly. He's as sweet and awkward as he comes off at first glance but there's something endearing about his gentle shyness even when he's raving about whatever thing has most recently captured his attention. You find yourself looking forward to the time you spend together more than you like to admit. You have no idea if your fondness is reciprocated to the same extent and you also have no idea how to broach the subject with him. Much like a skittish animal, you're always careful about how you make changes to your dynamic. It's something you try not to dwell on, if he likes you or if you'll tell him you like him and how to do so, things are good between you two and as they say, if it ain't broke don't fix it. 

Your head snaps up at the sudden rush of fear you sense. The book in your lap long forgotten anyway as you had been lost in your thoughts until the dread you felt in your very bones pulled you from them. It's not your own though, that panic, and you have to take a moment to pinpoint the source. You gasp when you realize it's coming from Steven. It's been a while since you felt someone's feelings so uninhibited and you rush out of your apartment before you can even consider a plan. He must be in trouble for you to feel his alarm this way. When you reach for his doorhandle you hear some sort of crashing sound inside and you force open his apartment door to find Steven evading someone attempting to corner him in the apartment.

"Steven!" You gasp when the masked intruder chucks some sort of dagger at him.

"Y/n?! Get out of here!" Steven shouts at you from behind the couch. You ignore him and charge the attacker by launching yourself using Steven's side table. The attacker can't react quickly enough to the kick that you aim directly at their chest and they go down hard. You don't give the stranger a chance to get up and strike either of you, taking advantage of their disoriented state you slip into their mind, 'suggesting' that they leave and forget they ever came here, forget Steven even exists and forget you while you're at it. When the masked assailant stands again they climb out of the window they came through without saying a word.

"Are you alright Steven?" You frown turning your attention to where he's frowning from behind his kitchen counter. When did he move behind the kitchen counter?

"What just happened?" He blinks at you.

"I am- a magical being of sorts-"

"Like a witch?"

"Something like that. I mean- I can do magic in the more traditional sense, like spells and such but most of my powers are telepathic. I can read minds and alter memories, reshape reality-"

"What?" You hardly register Steven's shocked exclamation.

"I mean that can take a lot of energy depending on the scale, like I obviously can't do it for everyone, everywhere, at the same time but like- I could say, make it look and feel like there are spiders all over this room." You shrug.

"Why would you ever-"

"Arachnids are a common phobia, it's gotten me out of some touchy situations." You say.

"That doesn't explain what just happened though." Steven shakes his head.

"Oh, I can control people if it comes down to it. I just- made the person leave and forget you exist."

"You can do what?!" His eyes widen.

"I don't use it! Usually. I've only done it a couple of times to protect myself or someone who really needed it." You shrug.

"And your protection was to force someone to do something else against their will?!"

"Hey, that person was literally trying to kill you! I could've taken the violent route instead but I'm not a fan of it!"

"So that man-"

"Doesn't remember being here, doesn't remember attacking you, doesn't even remember you exist. You're safe." You say.

"Holy shit."

"Look I wanted to be honest with you because I care about you but if this is too much for you to handle then- I will leave all I ask is that you keep my secret to yourself."

"You won't just... take it from me?"

"I don't want to. And I won't, unless that information in your hands becomes a threat to my life."

"Have you ever used them on me? Your powers?" He asks. You pause for a moment considering how to answer. Admittedly he doesn't seem to be taking all this super well, you wonder if it would be worse to just say no but looking at him you can't bring yourself to tell the lie.

"I have. Not- on purpose and nothing altering. No mind control or memory changing or reality reshaping- absolutely nothing that changed anything about you it's just that sometimes your thoughts are loud. You yell in your head a lot- in several voices. Sometimes I can hear them." You explain.

"You can hear them? The different voices?"

"Yes. I don't quite understand it but I never snooped I just- would leave when I realized it was happening again." You say.

"I think you should go." Steven says avoiding your gaze. Your shoulders drop for a moment that you're sure he doesn't see.

"I see. Alright but Steven-"

"Your secret is yours. I won't tell anybody." He says quietly. You nod although he's still not looking directly at you.

"Okay. If you need anything- my door's open. Otherwise, take care- Steven." You say and exit his apartment before he can respond. Steven's reaction hurts more than you'd like it to, you suppose you wouldn't have been able to keep the secret from him forever though. It would've come out eventually, especially if you got any closer to him as you had considered. 

The next two weeks are weird. Steven doesn't text you, or call you, or come over for tea or lunch, you make a point not to visit him at work as you are positive he's avoiding you based on the fact that he's clearly adjusted all of his habits so as to not run into to you around the apartment building. That- you think stings more than his initial reaction. To think he was so put out by your revelation that he no longer wanted to even risk seeing you... Whatever, you wouldn't dwell on it. The world keeps spinning. A sudden knock on your door interrupts you before you can focus back on what you were working on. With a confused frown, you walk over to the door and look through the spyhole to see Steven standing in the hall, and that surprises you immensely. For on that knock was sharp and harsh in a way you've never heard Steven knock on anything ever, but also for him to just show up at your door after 2 weeks is... unexpected. You pull open the door and lean casually against the frame.

"Hello." He nods and you immediately notice he does not sound like himself. You quirk an eyebrow at him.

"Steven? Hi. What are you doing here? And- why are you talking funny?"

"I'm not Steven my name is Marc Spector." He says.

"Did you hit your head or something?" You snort crossing your arms in confusion.

"No? I'm perfectly fine."

"Right except your name isn't Marc Spector it's Steven Grant. Unless you've been lying to me since we met which- would certainly be interesting but I don't think that's what's happening here." You say.

"Not quite. See we have a... condition-"

"Do not tell me about what's wrong with your body!" You put your hands up to stop him.

"It's psychological." He says.

"Oh okay. Proceed." You say.

"It's called dissociative identity disorder. My mind is- fractured. Essentially this body houses more than one consciousness." He explains.

"This sounds very Jekyll and Hyde and if you're coming to me to say you're a serial killer I don't-" You trail off when suddenly something clicks. "Holy shit you're one of the voices in Steven's head!" You gasp. You knew he sounded familiar but you didn't pinpoint it until just now.

"First of all, it's my head okay I am the original. Secondly- Steven told you about us?!"

"If he did do you think I would sound as confused as I do right now? No, he didn't tell me anything. I just realized why I recognize your voice." You say.

"Recognize my voice?" Now he's looking at you like you're crazy.

"I can hear you sometimes. You are quite loud- especially compared to the other one."

"You can hear us?" His eyes are wide as saucers.

"Yes, never on purpose though. I'm a telepath. I can read minds and change memories and alter reality and stuff like that so- sometimes I can hear you- which by the way we still haven't answered the billion dollar question why are you here?"

"Steven has been moping around for over a week now and every time we force him to leave he looks longingly at your door so I came to find out what the hell you did to him because I swear-"

"I didn't do anything to him. I told him I was a telepath and he freaked. He's been avoiding me since. All on his own. And before you start throwing around threats I'll warn you Marc Spector that I could take hold of your entire fractured little mind without even breaking a sweat. So tread carefully if you're going to start swearing things." Your eyes narrow at him.

"He's been avoiding you?" He blinks.

"We talked about my powers, he asked me to leave, and so I did. Probably assumes I'll take advantage of him using them or something." You shrug.

"Well you did just threaten me."

"It wasn't a threat it was a warning. Besides I'd never hurt Steven, you I don't know and you did start a pretty menacing sentence that prompted me to- never mind."

"Now I'm confused. If he's avoiding you, why is he moping around the apartment?" He frowns.

"You're asking me. You're the one that shares a body with him." You say.

"Explain to me exactly what went down?"

"I was in my apartment and someone attacked Steven- I don't know who or why but could feel it so I went over to help and I used my powers to get rid of them."

"What'd you do? Launch him out the window?"

"No? I just made him forget about us and where he was but when he mindlessly climbed back out the way he came in without attacking us I obviously had to explain some things. I guess Steven didn't take it all that well." You shrug.

"That doesn't sound right. I think you should talk to him."

"I- don't think he wants to do that." You shake your head.

"No. No, this has gone on long enough. Hang on." Marc says.

"Marc seriously mind your-"

"Y/n?" He grimaces. You recognize immediately that it's Steven you're talking to now.

"Steven- one the uh- voices? Marc? He thinks we need to have a conversation. Does he make a habit of meddling in your life this way?"

"Less often than you might think but- I do owe you an apology." His head drops.

"What for, exactly?"

"How I- handled things before. I was... cold, it's just that when you said you could hear Marc and Jake I was worried about what else you-"

"I'm sorry, who is Jake?" You shake your head at him.

"The identity disorder thing- there are three of us as far as we know. Myself, Marc, and Jake." Steven says and you nod as you piece it together.

"Would it be presumptuous of me to guess that Marc and Jake are not your only secrets?"

"No actually. Marc is an avatar."

"Of what?" You ask. Steven's shocked confusion prompts you to fill in the gaps, "I've met avatars for each of the sins so, one of those maybe? Or a celestial body of some sort? The moon perhaps- I'm guessing you don't mean in the same sense as the cartoon boy because people with elemental manipulation do not refer to themselves that way in real life so-"

"Khonshu." Steven says when you trail.

"What?"

"He's- Khonshu's avatar."

"Egyptian God. Interesting. Correct me if I'm wrong he's the god of justice, right?"

"That's right." He nods.

"So the guy that was attacking you a few weeks ago was probably mad at him for- something related to that."

"Most likely. Can't imagine a museum guest putting a hit out on me for not having any more pyramid pens or something." Steven scratches the back of his neck and you chuckle a bit at his joke.

"Interesting."

"Look- that day, I wasn't sure if this was something I was ready to tell you. I've never told anyone this before, the only person that knows is Marc's ex-wife, so when you said you could hear our thoughts I was worried you knew more than just that there were voices in my head and- I'm sorry." Steven trails off with a sigh.

"So- what changed? Why are you telling me now?"

"Well Marc revealed himself to you." Steven says. "But more than that I just- really hate not being able to talk to you. I like my life way more with you in it but I- after how I reacted I sort of figured I'd earned my misery, that I didn't deserve your forgiveness because when you chose to trust me with your secrets I turned you away, I even judged you, instead showing literally any modicum of support of the person I care about. I made an ass of myself."

"I wasn't upset with you, you know. I mean as far as shitty reactions go yours doesn't even make the top 5. You didn't tell the apartment building to gather their pitchforks so- I count that as a win." You shrug.

"I would never-"

"I know." You nod. "While we're- confessing our sins anything else you wanna share?" You ask with a chuckle. Steven holds your gaze for a long moment and there's a brief second where you consider finding out for yourself what he's contemplating so hard, you won't of course, but the silence drags long enough to make you want to rescind the question. Eventually, Steven's hand grabs your arm and yanks you towards him. His eyes are so wide at the action you'd think he's not the one who pulled you but before you can ask him about it his lips are on yours. The kiss is short and a bit unsure but his mouth is soft against yours and when he pulls away still with that wide-eyed look you do nothing but blink at him for a moment.

"I- I'm so sorry that was- I mean Marc was- I didn't plan- I wasn't going to-"

"Steven." You place your hand against his cheek to halt his frazzled rambling. "Did you want to kiss me?" You ask.

"I've wanted to kiss you for months." He breathes.

"Then don't apologize. I've wanted to kiss you too."

"Really?"

"Yes so- I think I'm going to do it again." You say pausing long enough to give him an out. When his eyes flutter closed you take that as your sign to lean forward and connect your lips again. You're sure in that moment you could do this forever and you silently wish to whatever powers above that you'll have that long to do it as many times as you wish.

***

A/N: I'm thinking of turning this into an anthology (like There is No Right Way) of the moonknight trio dating a telepath because I think it would be interesting idk- anyone interested in more of this dynamic?

[rizsu]

favourite assistant hanma, manjiro, rindou.

extra. same old assistant!reader au but its too good to not write.

hanma takes pleasure in being annoying. actually — not annoying, just being himself. he's an instigator, he's a liar, he's a "i truly don't care", he's the one and only! nothing entertains hanma more than seeing someone seethe at his lack of seriousness in situations. most times — if not all the time — hanma doesn't care about it after five minutes max. anything after is just him playing around.

spinning around his office chair, hanma slouches into its backrest, looking at the roof in intense boredom. you don't get in work until 7 am and that's where his main source of entertainment resurrects from.

listening to the rhythmic ticks and tocks of the clock, hanma allowed himself to slip into a mini-slumber — until he didn't. the blissful click of the doorknob sent alarming soundwaves to hanma's body. alas, his favourite person has finally arrived. fixing his position into that of a serious one, hanma's eyes focus on your figure.

and for you? you're squinting your eyes at him. there's a mischievous aura in the air and it's too early for it. stepping closer to his desk, you place two cups on his desk and greet him, "morning, mr. hanma."

"no good morning?" he asks, muttering a "thanks" as he slides his cup to the left of him.

sighing, you organize your files before replying, "no."

content with your mood today, hanma reaches for his pack of cigarettes. taking one out of its carton, he holds his lighter out to your direction ready to begin his daily routine, he speaks, "wanna light it?"

"maybe next year!"

being stuck in an elevator with your boss was not the office worker life you imagined. it's tense, hot, and awkward. you've barely spoken or met your boss, manjiro sano, outside of anything job related. he's usually a quiet individual — kind of scary but that's beside the point.

shifting your weight back and forth on your weight, you press your lips together before breaking the sweat-dropping silence, "has anyone been notified?"

manjiro's attention moves from his shoes to you and back to his shoes. he needs a few seconds to gather an answer that seems fit enough. after an intense council meeting with his twenty personalities, he's found his answer. pushing himself off from leaning on the elevator's side, he shoves his hands into his pockets and replies, "they should be... i think."

you nod at his answer, replying with a simple "ah." before you shuffle back to begging god that you'll be able to see the light up and away from your boss. it's not like you fear your boss ( this is a lie ), it's more-so that he's not the best at conversations ( this is the truth ).

manjiro's similar to a baby at the family reunion. quiet, jugdy, and would rather stay by someone they're comfortable with. currently, at this very second, manjiro has glued himself to the elevator's wall, prefering to freak out in his mind because it's totally not like he doesn't want to appear cool in front of you. truth be told, the man himself is going to piss his pants if he doesn't get out of the four walls.

at times like these does he wish for stairs. at least he can pretend to be spider-man and cushion you from hitting the floor directly if you ever fall.

he.. he didn't really imagine to be sitting like a child while being scolded. out of the million things that could've happened, being reprimanded for recklessly jumping into a fight without thinking wasn't one of them he had in mind. rindou likes to hear your voice, really, but not if you're shoving ten reasons why he should leave confrontations to kakucho down his throat.

"okay, okay, i get it. please stop," running up his complaints, rindou's head falls back into his chair.

"i know, mr. haitani, but —"

"it's rindou."

"don't interrupt. anyway, you shouldn't have gotten riled up like that! you're giving them what they want," you ramble on about his idiotic decisions while focusing on the ointment. massaging the medication on his bruise, you purposefully apply pressure on it to knock some sense into him. if your words won't do it then the pain should.

hissing, rindou pulls back with an offended expression. he knows you're serious about this but in all honesty, he wants to press your cheeks together. locking your gaze with his, rindou thinks for a good minute before he speaks, "wanna come over tonight?"

"sure," you graciously accept his offer, standing up to exit his room. but before that, you turn around to finish, "as long as you're buying dinner."

[writersdrug]

Ghost x Reader x Konig: I Don't Need You (Ch. 3)

<- Previous - Next ->

Summary: Price has a solution to end the fighting between you and Ghost - permanently.

Chapter Warnings: cursing

Notes: Aaand here's the next chapter. Things are about to get better(?) in the next few. Konig will appear soon, I promise. Ghost will be absent for a bit though. Might write some oneshots for him to keep yall happy in the meantime. But ch. 4 is in the works!!

(Y/N) (M/I) (L/N)

“BONNIE”

D.O.B. 10.22.94 / D.O.S. 10.22.13

Navy Seal, USSF / Sniper / Marksman

-----

Price had knocked on my door this morning, waking me up at an ungodly hour on my day off. “Come to my office at nine hundred. Don’t disappoint me.” He had said. He then walked off, leaving me in the doorway with a rats’ nest head of hair and puffy eyes from crying the night before. I stared into the hallway as I processed his words. Figures… throwing a knife at Ghost wasn’t the smartest thing to do.

I peered out beyond my doorframe, watching as Price stopped in front of Ghost’s door. It creaked open, words were exchanged briefly, and then Price moved on. There was a long pause before Ghost’s door slammed shut, followed by a bang as he punched the wall in his dorm.

What a child…

I looked back in front of me; Soap, whose dorm was adjacent to mine, was poking his head out. He winced mockingly. “Ouch… I think he didn’t like your assassination attempt, lass.” He mimicked me throwing my knife.

I stared at him for a moment, unamused. “Go fuck a donkey, Soap.” I barely caught a glimpse of his pout before I slammed my door shut.

-----

I got there at nine hundred on the dot, my hair still wet from my shower, and for the first time since I had met him, Price was the one who was late. Or rather, held up in his office by someone. But, nonetheless, his streak of punctuality was broken. A bad omen, for sure…

I listened, unintentionally, to the conversation in Price’s office. I heard him speaking with a man I heard called “Jax” – a higher-up, a therapist, someone from the “HR” of the military… I didn’t know who he was. But it appeared he would be deciding how Ghost and I would get reprimanded for the rift we were causing within the team.

“Bonnie?” said the unfamiliar voice. “Like Bonnie and Clyde?” followed by an affirmative grunt from Price. “Why?”

“She’s got looks, she’s small, but she’d blow your head open for the thrill of it. And you’d best believe she never misses, either.”

The unknown man paused, glancing over the file – my file, I could tell – and reading the details. “Sniper, marksman, Navy SEAL…“

Price huffed. “Stealth is her specialty. If her head is in the game, she’s a quick thinker, and an even quicker hitman – she once took out a whole checkpoint on her own. Killed ‘em all in less than a minute n’ a half, never even made a sound.”

The man whistled low in admiration. “How’d you get your hands on her?”

“Military couldn’t handle her attitude,” Price admitted, “but they didn’t want to waste the talent either. Bought her off of them before she could end up in the wrong hands.” He sounded smug.

“Leave it to you to pull an operations team out your ass, Price.”

“If it were that easy I’d have a lot more soldiers, Jax.”

The muffled lull of their conversation continued, and my mind refocused on what I had planned to say to Price. It was never supposed to be this messy. We both made a mistake, and a damn big one. We caused issues for the team, we were only thinking of ourselves… basically, share my side of the story, and admit and own up to it all. It was the truth, after all, as well as the best possible way to come out of Price’s office with my head and my job.

Of course, I’d leave out the part where Ghost insulted me – more than once. Or, where he was the one who started the fight in the hall. I mean, technically I did… but I was trying to right my wrong, he had no reason to go after me. Why did he do that? I suddenly realized that Ghost had been seeking out fights ever since a month ago. At first, we avoided each other, but he was the one who lurked around in places I frequented, just to single me out and argue.

That fucking prick.

The conversation in Price’s office ended, ended, and the door swung open. A tall, burly man stepped out: he looked down at me with scrutiny. I stared back. He chuckled.

I tilted my head up and narrowed my eyes. “Can I fucking help you?”

“I guess we’ll see.” He replied, before walking away with a smirk on his face. I scoffed in disgust just as Price stepped out of the office.

“C’mon in, Bonnie.” He stepped aside and gestured me into the office. I reluctantly stood, stretching my limbs and trying to seem unbothered, and entered. Price closed the door behind us. Feels like I’m a kid again in the principal’s office.

I took a seat in the chair facing his desk and immediately stared at the ground. I was hoping this was just going to be some stern, disciplinary lecture. Don’t let it happen again. Which I wouldn’t. I wouldn’t have lashed out at all, if Ghost hadn’t been pushing every single one of my buttons, when he was the one who created this whole landslide in the first place. Honestly if Ghost had just acted like nothing had ever even happened, like I was trying to do –

“- Bonnie, you with me?” Price said, snapping me back to the present. He was now sitting across from me and waving a hand in my direction.

I cleared my throat, doing a poor job at hiding my anxiety. “Yes sir.”

“Alright then. Let’s talk about it.”

I nodded. “Well, after the job in Mexico, maybe about a year – “

“Oh no, no…” Price cut me off with a shake of his head. “I don’t need a recap. I know everything that the two of you have been up to. The whole damn base does.”

I felt a shameful blush rise into my cheeks. If I had any confidence before walking into Price’s office, it was long gone by now. “Oh…” I mumbled.

“‘Oh’?” Price repeated. “Don’t tell me you actually thought you were goin’ under everyone’s nose, did you?” He tapped his pen on his desk with an irritated look. “Aren’t you supposed to be an ex Navy SEAL, here?”

I stared back at him, unamused and unphased by his comment. “Ok, so we may not have tried that hard to keep it a secret. But it was initially just a casual thing.”

Price nodded as he listened. “Initially… so what did it turn into? Because this – “ he gestured to me with a flourish of his pen, “ – is not from something casual.”

I couldn’t answer him. I averted my eyes to his desk, feeling his eyes burning into mine. Into my soul, trying to bring me to the breaking point. But if there was one thing I was perfect at, it was avoiding. So I let myself burn under his gaze, knowing the storm would eventually pass. One way or another.

Price sighed, dragging a hand down his face. “Look, it happens. You throw a bunch of people in a room, deprive them for a few months, and stress them the hell out – they’re bound to make mistakes.”

There was that fucking word again.

“I won’t lie, I’ve been there myself.” Price continued, and I raised a curious eyebrow at him. He ignored it. “And I’m not going to try and prevent it, it’ll only muck things up more. But, when it causes such an issue that my entire team is suffering, something needs to be done. And clearly you and Ghost aren’t reaching any solutions.”

I chewed my lip, leaning my elbows on my knees and anxiously bouncing my knee. I wanted to jump in and tell him my side of the story. I knew for a fact that Price had let Ghost spill his guts on the subject. He always listened to him no matter what. I wanted to explain why I was angry, exactly what Ghost had said and how I had felt – but I know he wouldn’t listen. Not to mention, it would have been extremely personal.

“So, going off of that –“ Price reached across his desk and grabbed a pile of papers, “ – I found a solution for the both of you.”

I sighed. Therapy, workplace relationship, probably anger management for me… Honestly wouldn’t be surprised if he suggested one of us moves to the other side of the barracks –

“That man out there? ‘Jax’. Director of a private military group, just like us.” He flopped the papers on the desk in front of me. I hesitated, looking at Price with confusion, to which he tilted his heads towards the papers. “Take a look.”

I sighed and grabbed the documents. He’s got to be so fucking dramatic, doesn’t he. I scanned the first page: Major August Jax, a very decorated ex-marine. Served two terms, now owns a private military special operations force. Based in Arizona, mostly deals with hostage situations –

“I’m sorry,” I toss the papers back onto the desk. “Why am I reading this?” I asked, my tone a little too angry. It gave away that I knew exactly what Price was thinking, feigning innocence just to push it away a moment longer.

“Jax’s got a good team on his hands.” Price began. He wouldn’t look at me. I leaned forward and glared into his eyes, daring him to look back. Fucking look at me when you throw me out the window, Price.

“He’s always looking for the best soldiers to add to his group. We got wind that he’d been asking around for a marksman. I offered him you.” He paused, noticing the hurt and anger building in my expression. “You’re a good soldier, Bonnie. I would only recommend you to the best team out there. And I might not even have half a mind to do this, if it wasn’t for the situation at hand, between you n’ Ghost.” His face showed compassion, although I felt none of it. It was a façade.

Instead, I felt betrayed. Maybe I did deserve some sort of reprimand for the way I’d been acting, but this felt like a banishment. That’s exactly what it was.

“You’re kicking me off the team?”

Price sighed, facing the dreaded conversation ahead. “This is a reassignment, I’m not- “

“You’re getting rid of me.”

“You’re making this seem much worse than it is.”

“How much did he pay you for me, huh?”

“Bonnie.” Price warned. Watch yourself, now. I was treading awfully close to the edge of the knife here, but I knew he had received some sort of payment or trade for me.

I sank into the back of my chair and huffed, folding my arms over my chest. “So Ghost gets a slap on the wrist. I get sent away.” I looked away from Pierce’s stern gaze and chewed my lip. The anger was quickly boiling over. “Like a fucking dog.”

“Ghost will get his dues.” Price said. “You both were causing issues for the team, now you’re both cleaning your mess up.”

I looked back at Price, taking a moment to glower at him. “Then why does he get to stay?” I said.

Price faltered, searching for the right words. “Ghost is a lieutenant, and he’s an important member of the team.”

I scoffed. “Wow, thanks…”

“- and…” he continued, “… because he’s been a part of this team for so long, he’s essential to it. He’s a leader for the 141, and I’d be ripping the group apart if he was the one goin’.”

“I’m waiting to hear how you somehow avoid insulting me in this next part.” I sent him a glare full of daggers.

“You’re not making this easy, girl.” Price leaned back in his chair. He was unphased by my anger; one of the few who were. “You’re a wild card: you’re a damn good shot, and your wit has gotten our missions through on the better side of things, more than once. But no one outside of our team knows that. You’re good at your game, but you don’t stand out – to the enemy, anyways.”

There was a pause in the conversation as Price let me process his words. They scraped the inside of my mind like burning daggers. Why is this such an easy decision for him to make? Did he decide this last night? Or in the last few days? Looking into Price’s eyes, I felt humiliated. Like I was never as important to him or the team as he made me feel. And it felt heartbreaking, watching his unreadable expression behind his locked fingers.

“Sir, I’m not a fucking baseball card.”

“No, you’re not.” He replied. “But it’s easier for you to move teams. No one knows what you’ve been involved in, because you managed to stay under everyone’s radar. And I salute you for that – it takes a lot of skill.”

His words weren’t convincing. They felt like colorful ribbons tied around a pile of trash. I huffed. “You’re a load of horseshit, you know that?” My anger clouded my judgement as I spoke, forgetting that Price was my superior.

He sighed, seeming to fight some internal war. “Jesus, y/n, I don’t want this anymore than you do. But you know this is how it has to be.”

“Is it?!” I raised my voice (something Price seemed to fully expect, as he remained unbothered). “No – you know what? You’re right.” I got up out of my seat, walking to the far corner of the room, pacing in small circles. “Ship me off to whoever gives you the most money, why don’t you? It’s not like I was a part of the team just as much as he is. But whatever, keep your happy little group together, right? Keep your favorites and to hell with everyone else, huh? I don’t care. I don’t fucking care anymore. I just want to get the fuck away from you all, so maybe you’re onto something, John.”

Price leaned forward in his chair, looking at me with stern eyes. He made it clear that I was dangerously close to crossing a line, if I hadn’t already. “You listen hear and you listen good, alright? We do dirty work in an even dirtier world for people who don’t deserve shit. I run things smoothly by having a team that respects one another. They know they have each other’s backs out there. They work together. You’d best be very careful with what you say about how I operate my team. Now you n’ Ghost have been causing way too much trouble for way too long. It’s been affecting the whole team, and the two of you have been so selfish that you can’t even notice. You in particular have completely lost yourself to your emotions. It’s my job to make sure that my division stays in-tact and on top of their shit. And you bet that the moment I see a flame threatening to burn all that down – I snuff it out. In whichever way gets it done.”

I’d never seen Price so angry before. At least, not with me. Knowing that I had disappointed him – and was currently doing that – felt worse than a bullet to the chest. Price had saved my ass when I was about to be dumped in a military prison; I respected him for that and was forever thankful. So, when I realized how I had just disrespected him, a hint of shame tugged at my mind.

But I forced it down. He was uprooting my entire life from the past ten years and expecting me to ‘take one for the team’. Maybe I hadn’t done as much for everyone as he had done for us, but he said it himself all the time: “Your skills are unmatched.” “We would’ve had a lot more losses without you out there.” “You’re essential for a smooth mission, Bonnie.” The only reason he was doing this was because Ghost had probably talked him up about it. Ghost could really be manipulative when he wanted to… but this still hurt. It still made my blood boil, thinking that Price was so quick to get rid of me, like I was a weed in his garden.

“So that’s it.” I said, defeated, the sting of tears threatening to fall. There was no coming back from this. “I’m out.”

Price nodded, his lips pressed into a tight line. “Afraid so.” He said curtly. He’d had enough of trying to sugarcoat things. I could tell he just wanted me to skip to the acceptance stage and start packing my bags.

I blankly stared at him. I felt my body slump as the realization finally hit. I felt the need to say something, anything, but nothing worth saying came to mind. Instead I looked at Price, sitting behind his desk, hands folded as he watched me process it all. A sudden anger flooded my veins. This is just another transaction for him. He would have done this for any situation. I narrowed my eyes as my mind was brimming with rage.

Price could tell I was getting worked up again. He sighed in annoyance, glancing at the paperwork on his desk. “Look, girl, it’s all said and done. Best you start packing your things tonight, get some sleep before you leave tomorrow.”

Like a weed. Like a thorn in his side. My breaking point had been reached. Crushed. I was back at the bottom of the ladder, where I started out with the 141.

“You know what, sir… “ I leaned over the back of my chair, placing my hands on the arm rests and glowering at Price. “… respectfully- “

“Bonnie-“ he warned, but I didn’t care.

“ -fuck you.” I shoved my finger indignantly in his face, then immediately turned on my heels. I punched open the doors to his office, feeling the buzz of my anger radiate off of me.

Price doesn’t say anything as I storm off. He doesn’t have to. The decision has been made – I could shout and curse and fight all I wanted, but I was being taken off of the team, whether they had to handcuff me and drag me out or not. I felt humiliated realizing that the whole base would be able to guess what happened, and why. I knew that Ghost wouldn’t dare open his mouth about it – but he wouldn’t stop the rumors, either. Price wouldn’t even care.

Fucking push-over. Of course he chooses Ghost. Two peas in a fucking pod, they are.

-----

I didn’t sleep. I had packed everything – my clothes, personal files, knives, and whatever else I cared to call mine – in less than an hour and in three duffel bags, which were now piled by my door. I sat on the edge of my bed and stared at them. My head was empty, unable to process a single thought or emotion. I was spent from my conversation with Price. I didn’t cry after, like I usually did when I fought with Ghost. At least that will be over. I tried to think optimistically, but it was hard. It was hard to think at all. The hours ticked by like minutes as I waited for the dawn to break.

Finally, at seven hundred and nine hours, a knock rapped against the door. I knew who it was. I stood up and swiftly grabbed my bags, opening the door – Jax stood there, a proud smile on his face.

“You said all your goodbyes?” he asked.

“Yep.” I lied. I hadn’t said anything to anyone after leaving Price’s office.

“Great. Let’s get moving, then.” He grabbed one of my bags from me, throwing it over his shoulder. “I’ll give you a hand, young lady.”

Already, I could feel myself hating the reassignment. Already, Jax was treating me like a fragile, sensitive girl. To be fair, the 141 did at first, but they had grown to see me as the skill and potential that I am. An independent soldier. I didn’t want to start over and try to prove myself to a new team. No use crying over it now.

I followed Jax, passing Soap as he stood leaned in his doorway, looking melancholic. I looked back, emotionless. I would miss him. He was one of the only people I would miss at this point, after what had gone down. He was always there to listen, and either offer solutions, or just let me vent. Whichever I needed, he provided. Losing him was going to hurt the most.

But I wasn’t going to let it. I turned my head from him and kept moving.I saw that it looked like Soap wanted to say something. I ignored it.

Beth and Skyline weren’t there. Neither were Gaz or Price. I knew Ghost was somewhere, lurking from the sidelines as I loaded my bags onto a heli. But I didn’t care. I did, but I didn’t let myself look back. If I did I would be in shambles, realizing how much I needed this place and the people here. I felt like a tree being torn out of the ground, roots hanging in the air, searching for a place to ground myself. As long as I didn’t look back, as long as I pushed back the pain and the loneliness, the voice in my head screaming for me to get closure, to say goodbye and get one final look – I would be fine. Or at least, it wouldn’t hurt as much.

I slapped a headset over my ears, sliding into the back of the heli. Jax and an unfamiliar soldier sat in the front as we prepared to take off. “Where are we headed?!” I asked over the deafening sound of the spinning blades. I ignored the sickening feeling of loss that ebbed in the back of my mind.

“Didn’t you read the file from Price?!” Jax turned and looked at me through his dark sun glasses, a smirk resting on his lips. “We’re going to Czech Slovakia!!”

[security-chief-odo]

To Love and be Loved in Return

Roy Kent x Reader

Description: Both you and Roy Kent are in love, but of course neither of you knows your feelings are requited. Who will be the first to spill the beans?

Chapter 1 - World’s Greatest Boss

Word Count: 1k

• • •

You have been working as a coaching assistant for AFC Richmond for the past six months. Though your job technically speaking is to assist the entire coaching staff, in reality, you were hired to manage Roy Kent.

Though he is an excellent coach, he is god awful at things like maintaining a schedule, filing any paperwork in a reasonable time frame, and generally dealing with the public. This is where you come in and make his life (and Rebecca’s) easier.

Your life on the other hand has gotten much harder as a result of this job. You have had a school girl crush on Roy since he was still playing for Chelsea. A crush you had assumed was just superficial and would fade as you got to know him as a coworker and a friend. If only life was ever that easy.

If anything, your crush has just gotten stronger because not only is Roy insanely hot, but he is kind, smart, and surprisingly funny. Perhaps more importantly though, he is sitting in front of your desk, not noticing as you stare at him.

“What do I have to get done this weekend?”

“Well, it’ll be a busy one for you. You need to go pick up your suit from the tailor tomorrow for the gala next weekend.”

He groaned, “I still don’t see why I have to go to that stupid thing.”

“It is quite literally in your job description Roy.” He rolls his eyes at that but lets you continue. “You have a game Tuesday, press conference after that. Do you have your shoes for the gala?”

“I’m not getting new shoes for that shit, I have a pair that’ll do. Do you have my talking points prepped for the press conference?” You hand over a bullet pointed page. “And if we lose?”

“You won’t, but that’s on the printer.” You turn in your chair to grab it but he's up and behind your desk already, skimming over the page.

“What would I do without you?”

“Crash and burn, probably”

He chuckled at that, “Yeah, probably. So I, uh, wanted to ask before, but are you going to the gala?”

“I’m office staff, I’m not sure I’m invited”

“Of course you’re fucking invited.”

“I’ll ask Rebecca about it.”

“No need, you can be my plus one.” You stop dead in your tracks at his words. Of course you want to go to the gala with Roy but there’s no way he means it like that and sitting by his side all night just might be the death of you.

“Oh um, I don’t know”

“Come on, y/n”

“I don’t have anything to wear. My wardrobe isn’t exactly fitting for a gala”

“Then I’ll buy you a dress.”

“You don’t need to do that. I’m sure you had some model you were going to bring anyways.”

“I’m not that guy anymore, y/n. And anyways, you deserve to go, you’re part of the team” Right, part of the team. He’s being a good boss. That’s all he was ever doing.

“I’ll think about it.”

“I’ll give Keeley my credit card and have her pick you up Saturday”

Returning to your emails, you began typing as you continued the conversation. “Anyone ever told you that you’re kind of an amazing boss?”

Right, you only see him as your boss. Nothing more. Probably never will be anything more. He just needed to accept that.“I don’t know that that’s the word the boys would use.”

“Well, maybe you should try buying all of them fancy dresses?”

“You know, that just might do the trick,” a smile threatens to cross his face, “but I don't think they’d look nearly as good.”

“Careful sir, don’t let Isaac hear you say that one.”

That one actually got a laugh out of him. “You’re right. Then I might have to bring him as my date instead–” His eyes widen as soon as the word ‘date’ leaves his mouth and he stumbles out, “not that I’m asking you as my date. I’m not. I just–”

Despite the sinking feeling in your gut, you let him off the hook. “Of course not Roy. I didn’t assume you were.”

“Right. Well. I’ll just leave you to uh, you know, I’ve got a meeting.” He rushed out, nearly slamming your door behind him. As soon as he was out of earshot, he groaned “Fuck.” Roy should have known better than to say anything. You are sweet and beautiful and fucking brilliant and he might have just ruined everything.

You are sitting in your office, having completed Roy’s schedule, you move on to Beard and Nate. There’s no way those meetings will be nearly as painful as your last one. You never thought Roy would return your feelings, but you figured you would at least have to ask before he could reject you.

Roy and you are clearly avoiding each other all day Thursday. He takes his lunch in his car. You don’t even leave your office. You wait until the end of the day to go meet with the assistant coaches about their calendars, hoping that Roy may have left early.

You aren’t quite so lucky and bump into him as you enter the locker room. Of course this knocks your papers out of your hands. You squat down to pick them up.

“Fuck,” he growls, “sorry.”

“It’s ok. I wasn’t exactly looking where I was going either.”

He extends a hand to help you up. Your hand feels nice in his and you both are holding hands for a moment longer than necessary before pulling away.

With nothing left to say, you find yourself looking into his kind eyes before you are interrupted by Nate.

“Oh y/n, I was just about to come grab you for our meeting.”

“Right.” you turn to Roy, “See you tomorrow!”

He waves as he walks away, not for a second noticing where your eyes were as you watched him leave. You follow Nate back into the office for your meetings with the assistant coaches, your thoughts however stay on the head coach.

• • •

Click here for chapter 2!

Let me know if you’re interested in joining my taglist, either for this series or my general taglist. Otherwise, just let me know what you think!

[cookies-and-music]

Ghost. I suggest listening to Creep by Rediohead (or Kelly Clarkson's cover)

PAIRING: TVA!LokixOC

RATING: ALL

SUMMARY: Loki meets sombody at the TVA he once knew. Unfortunately she doesn't seem to remember him.

Part 2 here

When he saw her one day, wandering through the shelves of the TVA library, he thought she was a ghost. Loki would have sworn it was her but not exactly her. There was something different; her hair, for example, was brown, not red, and she was much more smiling than he remembered. Loki initially had doubts about whether it was her, but then he spent days observing her—watching how she furrowed her brows when concentrating on reading a file, how she leaned against the railing to gaze at the city suspended in time, how she always chose apple pie in the cafeteria. Every day was a stab to his heart until he decided to approach her.

"Miss Princhett," Loki approached the cafeteria table carrying a cup of tea for himself and a cup of coffee. "May I join you?" he offered her the cup.

Lydia Princhett. Shield agent. She had red hair and a stern face. Died in 2012.

"Of course, even though I don't think we've ever been introduced," she grabbed the cup, giving him a slight smile. Loki tightened his lips.

Lydia Princhett. Consultant at the TVA. She had brown hair and a relaxed expression.

"I'm Loki, from Asgard."

"I know," she brought the cup to her lips, and for a moment, Loki was filled with hope. "Everyone knows about the new consultant with Mobius," she laughed almost mockingly. "I'm a consultant too. I was supposed to be disposed of, but in my timeline I was a bounty hunter, and they thought I could be useful," she shrugged.

Loki knew. That's why he’d kept her. No one knew better than her how to find someone and, conversely, how to hide them.

"And are you? Useful?"

"I sincerely hope so, otherwise, I don't think they'll wait long before getting rid of me," she chuckled lightly.

Loki remembered the first time he heard her laugh. He had tried to make a toast and burnt himself. Her laughter sounded like a bell, and the burn was absolutely worth it.

But none of that had ever happened for her.

That Lydia had never fought against him, lost, and spat at his feet, telling him how he would never be feared and respected like Odin.

She had never tended to his wounds after a fight, even under coercion.

She had never looked at him with pity when she realized that, in turn, Loki was under someone else's influence.

She had never agreed to hear his story and had never told hers.

"What was your Nexus event?" Loki didn't think before speaking; it just came out.

"Don't you think that's too personal a question?" Lydia raised an eyebrow but decided to answer anyway. "I decided not to go to work one day; I had absurd cramps," she leaned closer, whispering and eliciting a light laugh from both of them. "I didn't think the world would change much just by not going to work for one day."

Loki tilted his head. "When was it?"

Lydia shrugged. "I don't know exactly how long ago, time is a mess here, but it was in 2012."

Loki nodded, lips pressed into a line.

That Lydia had never known him, and she had never been a causality during the New York attack.

There was a moment of silence in which she observed him, and Loki felt tiny under her gaze. It seemed like she was analyzing his soul, exposing every secret.

"Do you know me, Loki of Asgard?" Lydia tilted her head, offering a smile.

He looked at her for a second. "No."

"But did you know me?"

Loki didn't answer, lowering his gaze.

Lydia finished her coffee, placing the cup on the table and sighed before standing up. "Well, thanks for the coffee; it was delightful," she gave him a forced smile and began walking towards the exit. Loki opened his mouth, but nothing came out.

Lydia stopped after a few steps.

"For what it's worth," she turned to him, "I'd like to get to know you, Loki of Asgard."

Loki gave her a slight smile, the saddest he had ever made, and with a nod, he bid farewell to her ghost before finishing his tea and returning to work.

[lyrichi]

This is literally my first post ever but brainrot hit me like a train

Long story short; Obey Me x Cult of the Lamb! MC

Putting on some music so that I can get through this whole thought process

OKAY SO

I was playing cult of the lamb for the past like 3 hrs cause why not and it fucking hit me -- CotL MC and OM MC are both sheep things

So I thought what if they were the same

First off in this little au thing that my brain conjored here are some solid factors;

Barbatos, Diavolo and Lucifer know that mc runs a cult cause files and shit but they didn't share w anyone else who's involved in the program cause they didn't want to cause chaos and/or confusion

Narinder and Lilith are related closely but not the same person - like they're not blood related or anything but basically Lilith's death caused Narinder's "birth" or whatever

MC still has those cult recruitment abilities in the devildom but they don't try anything unless it's on lower level demons (they're tempted to try to recruit one or more of the brothers because of name rep but haven't risked it)

Solomon was apart of MC's cult but was a resenter and left after MC wasn't able to reeducate him (also doesn't tell anyone but vaguely holds it over the dateables' ((- the ones who know)) heads that they know more abt MC than they do)

They see each other for the first time and it's like that one spider man meme

MC is vaguely aware of the other worlds before entering the devildom before being summoned (?) for the program because of Narinder

MC is very good at cleaning/cooking/being the parent cause of the cult so they're basically unfazed by wack shit that happens

yeah ok uh

I have no clue whats gonna happen with this random ass au that I've made so here's some shenanigans;

--

I feel that everyone else would find out abt the cult MC runs at dinner or something. Like, they're a bit tipsy and blurt it out to mammon and he says it a bit to loud (this is w the brothers);

MC downs another shot of whatever human-working alcohol they have and turn to face Mammon again. "So that's how I became a cult leader"

Mammon, obviously shocked, does a spittake on whatever he's drinking and whips his head towards MC. "You're a cult leader?!"

Obviously having said that a bit too loud, that causes all surrounding conversations to pause, possibly with a faint record scratch. MC realises that everyone's looking at them with variations of confusion and shock, and pauses themself. They look at Mammon with confusion in their eyes and answer.

"Yeah?" They look around at the varying stares and ask, "What's so wrong with that?"

A few seconds pass before anyone says anything. Satan clears his throat and starts, "You're the leader of-" but before he could finish anything Asmo pipes in, standing up and slamming his hands on the table. "For who?!"

"Uh.." MC looks away, not knowing how to explain their predicament, despite this new conflict bringing them right back to being sober. Before they could even think of what to say, the table erupts into questions and theories.

After a few minutes Lucifer calms down everyone, and turns to MC to let them continue.

"Not to burst bubbles, but it's for none of you."

They pause before speaking again, "I didn't mean it like that- it's just--"

Asmo sinks into his seat with some sort of defeated noise and Belphie comments; "See, I told you."

MC continues, ignoring them. "I was kind of forced into it.. I'm not being hurt or anything though!" MC waves their hands around in the air a bit trying to collect their thoughts before sighing. "That's why I leave to the human world every day."

MC offers this like it's some kind of grand explanation, but they really have no idea how to explain anything.

Beel, who didn't seem like he was paying any attention in the first place looks up with his mouth full and asks, "Why'd you hide it?"

"I didn't, Lucy did" MC takes a bite of whatever noodles were made with dinner tonight. They outwardly seem to be trying to avert attention from themself.

Satan mutters an "of course he did" before Mammon turns to Lucifer and loudly asks "Why?"

Lucifer composes himself before answering "I don't want to make their time here worse as we got used to having a human here in Devildom"

A few beats of silence go by before everyone starts talking over eachother again. Lucifer tries to quiet everyone down again, but MC interrupts with a simple "If you have any questions, just ask."

Silence falls over the table again, before Levi asks a question that he was almost positive everyone else had. "Why are you so devoted to it?"

MC chews for a second before answering. "My followers can't really take care of themselves, so if I'm not there at least once every two days, one or more of them will get sick, start resenting, or die."

--

Etc etc.....

Yeah idk what else to do I think that night will just go on like that

Um

I feel that the rest of the ppl who don't know find out through the grape vine and it becomes that week's gossip. This is also how people find out which demons are apart of their cult and which aren't. Like with the clothing change and MC interacting with them a lot more

The gossip also kind of expands their cult, which MC is all for.

I feel like the demon bros would want to join but MC wouldn't let them because (after finding out about the cults run by humans for said brothers) they don't want to merge cults because of how close they are with their followers

I feel that the cult might split into two; the human half and the demon half.

The human half is exactly like the CotL cult, how they need to be taken care of basically and need sermons basically every day and what not. While the demon half is kind of just a RAD after school club where they get together every Friday or something and MC just checks up on them to make sure nobody is dying or something

------

Yeah that's it I might add to this in the future

I might also do one of these for the binding of Issac

Love that game

Yeah anyway this is quite literally my first post ever uh

Hydrate y'all <3

[ficreadergirl]

Welcome to my Sweetheart

Ep15

"Let's feed you love." you said as you set a plate of food in front of Gloria. She purred and started eating her breakfast. You watched her for a moment before getting your own breakfast. You were sitting at the table, eating when you heard a knock on your door. You wiped your mouth and went to open it. There was a man holding a giant bouquet of roses.

"These are for you miss." he said handing them to you. You looked at him confused before looking down at the roses.

"From?" you asked.

"From mr Barry Pierce." he replied. You stared at him for a second before looking back at the flowers. The man smiled at you before leaving. You saw a card attached to the flowers.

"Dear detective Y/n. I couldn't explain myself properly last night. So I wanted to talk to you about my offer if you'd like to listen. I hope these flowers will make up for the awkwardness of our meeting. -Barry" it said. You frowned and put the card down. You weren't sure what to think about all of this. Gloria jumped onto your lap and started cleaning herself.

"Who was that?" Helena asked walking into the room. She had just woken up. "Was it Dick?" she asked excitedly.

"No... it was someone else." you said putting the flowers down.

"Really? I thought he was trying to make up other night for you." she said with a smirk. "It was clear something happened Y/n. Don't try to deny it." she teased.

"Nothing happened Helena. Also flowers are not from him." you said rolling your eyes and trying to hide your blush.

"Then who sent them?" she asked curiously.

"Barry Pierce." you said looking down at the card. She was silent for a moment before speaking again.

"Is he a friend of you?" she asked carefully.

"No... he's just some guy I'll catch later." you said nonchalantly. "But he seems to be interested in me."

Helena felt worry creeping up inside her chest. "Y/n. You should be careful I think." she said seriously. You gave her a look.

"Why did you say that? You know him?"

She sighed and sat down next to you. "Not personally. But I heard couple of things about him. Bad things..." she trailed off.

"What kind of bad things? And how you know that?" you asked suspiciously.

"Well... Y/n... it's just... y'know I was working as barmaid." she explained. "And I met few people in there. They told me stories about him. He's not the guy you want to get involved with."

You looked away thinking about what she said. It made sense but at the same time... "I don't think you ever told me about your barmaid days Hell." you pointed out.

"That's because it wasn't important then." she replied defensively. "Look, Y/n... I'm just saying... be careful. Okay?"

"Okay." you said finally giving in. "Thanks for telling me."

"Anytime." she said with a small smile. You both continued eating breakfast in silence. After finishing, you decided to go to work early since you had some paperwork to do.

"I'll see you later then." you said giving Helena a small wave before leaving the flat.

You walked down the empty hallway towards your office, thinking about what Helena said about Barry. You didn't know much about him except for his interest in you which you found a bit creepy. You saw Dick was already there, going through some files. You didn't know how to start the conversation after what happened last night. You sat down in your chair quietly and started working on the pile of paperwork that was waiting for you.

"Hey, Y/n." Dick said after a while breaking the awkward silence. You looked up to see him leaning against the door frame.

"Hi, Dick." you replied trying to keep your voice neutral.

"Listen, about last night... I don't want you to think that it changes anything between us. We're still friends and partners." he said quickly. "I just got a little carried away."

You nodded slowly trying not to show any emotion on your face. You knew that he was right but it still hurt a little bit. "I know, Dick." you said softly. "We are friends and partners first."

Dick was about to say something else when your phone buzzed. You looked at the screen and groaned in annoyance. "I'll be back." you said getting up from your chair.

"What's wrong?" he asked concerned.

"It's nothing. I'll be right back. Don't forget what you were saying." you said rushing out of the room before he could ask anything else.

You walked down the hallway and answered the phone. "I'm busy--" you started but stopped when you heard the voice on the other end.

"Ms Y/n. You have to come here." Barry's voice was urgent. "I'm at my club. There was a shooting."

You froze for a moment. You decided he was telling true after hearing the panic in his voice. "I'm on my way." you said before hanging up. You went to your office but Dick wasn't there anymore. You took his car keys and rushed out of the building and headed to Barry's club.

When you arrived, the place was in chaos. Police officers and paramedics were everywhere. You parked your car and rushed inside to find Barry but he wasn't there. You spotted a familiar figure standing near the bar, her eyes were darting around the room.

"Babs?" you called out as you approached her. She turned around and her eyes widened when she saw you.

"Y/n! What are you doing here?" she asked clearly surprised.

"Barry called me. He said there was a shooting." you explained quickly. "What are you doing here?"

Babs hesitated for a moment before sighing. "I was... drinking. Dick has nothing but coffee in his apartment." she said with a weak smile. "I didn't expect this to happen."

You nodded understandingly and glanced around the room. "Did you see who did it?" you asked.

Babs shook her head. "No, but I heard gunshots and saw people running. I hid behind the bar." she said her voice shaking slightly. That shaky voice of her sounded fake to you but you decided to let it go.

"Okay. Did you give your statement yet?" you asked trying to keep your voice calm and professional.

"No, I haven't. But I was asked to wait." Babs replied.

"Okay. Are you okay by the way?" you asked.

"I'm fine. Just a bit shaken up." Babs said with a weak smile. You nodded and patted her shoulder reassuringly before heading to find Pierce.

As you searched the club, you couldn't help but feel uneasy. The air was thick with tension and fear. You finally found Barry sitting alone in a corner booth. His face was pale and he looked like he had seen a ghost. You didn't understand why he was so scared until you saw him. It was Nightwing.

Other eps

[char-chats]

Confession

CW: S3xua1 themes, alc0h0l beverages and th!gh gr1nd1ng

You had a crush on Aki and it was a pretty big one at that, you admired everything about him from his determination to his coldness. Not to mention he was your best friend you first met him when you came to work for Makima as your first mission was done with him and ever since then you two have grown your relationship together and bonded . Sure you've had crushes before but this one was different. It seemed like everything he did made you have butterflies in your stomach and cheeks turn red. From the way he spoke so soft and kindly towards you to the way you felt his warm callous hand on you when he touched you. You kept telling yourself that 'I'll get over this small crush' or 'Im just over thinking things!’ Yeah none of those excuses worked. It didn't help that Makima kept putting you two to work together for mission, it felt like she was doing this on purpose. And this occasion was no different Makima put you and Aki together, "you and Aki will be working together for this mission for this devil, this one will be easy and the last one for the day.." she said in her normal blunt tone as she handed you and Aki a file about the Devil you two were up against. Just hearing those words made your heart race and those same stupid butterflies in your stomach come back once again like they often did. Without any objections from the either of you, you headed off to complete your mission safely and quickly... An hour or two later and you both were out of breath, sweating and trudging back to the car out of exhaustion. You breath a sigh of relief as you sit in the car seat as Aki starts the car up and begins to drive off. "So tired" you say as you look out the window, "yeah me too.. Just wanna go home" Aki mumbles as he stares straight ahead at the road, it was getting pretty late. You both continue to make small conversation about what happened and things that happened throughout the busy day. Eventually Aki pulls up to your apartment as he always does after every work day. You give him a soft tired smile as you thank him "thanks Aki as always..." You then step out the car as you grab your satchel you "no problem" he says in a happy but tired tone. You could already feel your cheeks burning up from how he looks so cute. You look away as Aki continues to speak "text me if you need anything [Name]" you nod gripping the strap of your satchel out of nervousness not really hiding your blush as it was now dark out and he couldn't see you thankfully "yeah g-get home safe" and with a thank you from Aki he drives off back to his place. You quickly turned and opened the door and pressed the button to the elevator ' I'm so stupid, why did I stutter? I hope he didn't notice ' you think to yourself as you step in the elevator, sighing... As you open the door to your apartment you toss your satchel off to the side, loosening your tie and taking off as well as tossing your blazer and pants off Into a random spot on the floor. This leaves you in your bra, underwear, socks half unbuttoned up uniform shirt and loose tie. You trudge to your kitchen, open the refrigerator and take out a twelve pack of an alcoholic beverage. You sigh as you take the pack and place it on the coffee table and plop yourself on the sofa opening yourself a can and taking a sip, a nice way to unwind from a tiring day, right?...

You're startled awake by the sound of loud knocking at your front door. You're laying on the sofa on your side your arm hanging off the edge of the cushion and there's even slight drool at the corner of your mouth. Your don't even remember falling asleep the TV was even on playing some random show. You slowly get up taking in your surroundings it was dark out and there was many empty alcohol cans all over the coffee table not to mention the huge headache you have. Your thoughts were interrupted by and another loud set of knocking at your door. "Going!” you shout grogily as your wobble to the door and open the door, you felt your heart skip a beat as you see Aki standing in front of you holding a plastic bag with some food and bottles of water. " A-Aki?! What are you doing here?!” you say in embarrassment as your cheeks are now bright pink. Aki takes a good look at you taking note of how your appearance is blushing and turning his head away as he notices that your button up shirt is open and you're in underwear with messy hair. "Y-You texted me random things about how you miss me.. And just babbling nonsense.." You stand there dumbfounded "I.. Uh i-" but Aki cuts you off "but considering the strong alcohol smell that's coming from you and your texts I'm guessing you're drunk" Aki explains as you let him and locks the door behind him, turns on the lights. He then sets the plastic bag down on the coffee table, and sits on the sofa. You follow along as you sit beside him your cheeks red from embarrassment as you up button up your shirt and stare up at the TV so you don't have to make eye contact with Aki. He sighs as he takes the water bottle out of the bag and hands it to you still looking away with a slight blush on his cheeks. You take it from him and start to drink it sobering up quickly from the tension in the room and the little nap you unintentionally had. "Sorry.." you mumbled looking down at your exposed thighs. Aki then gets up and starts to clean up the empty cans "it's fine you just... Worried me for a second.." He mutters. 'He looks so cute.. Fuck it.' You lightly grip the sofa cushions out of nervousness, Akis back was turned to you and the words seemed to just spill out, like it was natural to say. "I like you Aki."

Aki stops what he's doing and it felt like an eternity of silence the he responded sounding a little upset "... Your just drunk stop saying those things..", "no I'm not Aki..". To be fair you were telling the truth, you've sobered up at this point from the water and sleeping it off. You stood up and grabbed Akis wrist to turn him around. "[Name] what are yo-” you cut him off but by cupping his face in your hands and pressing your lips onto his soft ones. He was surprised, his eyes widened, he can faintly taste the alcohol on your breath. Aki slowly closes his eyes as he begins to melt into the kiss. You pull back out of breath as you begin to whisper, your face inches away from his. "I like you.. No I love you.. I liked your from the first day, I admire everything about you i-its just.." Your voice began to shake and crack from the fear of him rejecting you. Did you just fuck up your friendship by kissing him right now? Does he hate you now? Did you really just throw away years of friendship just for a kiss? "Your a really great person... You don't have to accept me but if you want to remain friends we can, but you don't because you can't see me the same w-way or beca-” your sentence was cut off with Aki cupping your face and pulling you in for another passionate kiss. " I like you too.. I love you" Aki whispered in between kisses. Your hands slipped around his waist as you could feel your face heat up, this has to be a dream?...

Next thing you know your straddling Akis right thigh grinding your needy wet pussy on it as Aki means back on the couch his callous hands on your waist as he watches you needily grind yourself on him. It was beautiful sight to see he's always fantasized about this..about you, this makes him get an erection grow in his pants. "You look so pretty grinding yourself on me" he says in a lustful tone. You place your hands on his shoulders to balance yourself moans spilling out your mouth "A-Aki~". You started to rub faster making Akis boner grow even more "s-shit [name] such a slut for me aren't you" Aki groaned out. Suddenly Aki grips your hips making you stop. "Stop don't cum yet" he says in a stern demanding tone, he slowly undoes his belt and zipper finally letting his hard cock pop out, to be quite honest he was big but not too big about 5.8 inches. He stroked himself slowly pre-cum slipping out and dripping down onto his pants.

You blush seeing how excited he was "don't stare at it, it's embarrassing" Aki said in a embarrassed tone mumbling that last part. He looked so cute cute all blushy, you began to kiss his cock softly up and down. This makes Aki let out soft whimpers as he gently places his hand on your head. You continued to teased him kissing his cock ever so softly, your warm wet lips pressing against his hard cock even rubbing your thumb over the head smearing the pre cum slightly. Aki let out shakey breaths "Come on~ stop teasing me" he whined. You couldn't help but to give in since he looked so cute. You got up and straddle over him, your wet pussy hovering over his cock and slowly lowering yourself down on him. You felt Akis warm hands on your hips "yeah just like that baby~ good girl~" you gripped onto his shoulders as you felt your cheeks warm up as he continued to whisper sweet nothings in your ear. Soon enough you were sitting on his cock. You started to bounce slowly up and down on his cock. You couldn't help but to let moans and heavy breaths fall from your mouth "ngh~ f-fuck" as you ride his cock, Aki unbuttons your shirt exposing your tits. As your bounce up and down Aki massages your tits "such pretty tits" he mumbles as he even pulls you closer kissing your chest softly. He couldn't take it anymore you just looked like such a slut thrusting yourself down on his cock while letting out such lustful moans. You're just as pretty as he imagined. He couldn't hold himself back... His hands moved back to your waist and gripped your hips harshly and began to thrust up inside you hitting that sweet spot, making you let out a loud surprised gasp along with you digging your nails into his shoulders. Wet noises and moans filled the room "ah! f-fuck! Aki~" you moaned out with hot tears running down your cheeks as your head tilted back in pure pleasure.

Aki grunted as he felt your walls tighten "fuck, you're doing so good~" Aki moaned as he kept thrusting up into you. You felt as if you were at a breaking point the pleasure was too much and you were going to cum soon and Aki knew that. "C-come on cum for me [Name]~ be a good girl and do that for me" He praised he slightly whined out. All you could do was nod your head with tears down your face and moans spilling out . And with one good last deep thrust up, you felt a wave of pleasure wash over as you as warm thick cum filled you. You let out a loud moan throwing your head back "Aki!~" . Your legs were shaking as your juices were running down your legs and his cock even getting some on his pants. As for Aki he let out a grunt even a few moans as he felt your walls squeeze his cock as he came deep inside you... You lay against him your bare chest pressed against his as you both try to catch your breaths. He didn't pull out he loved how you felt so warm around him. "Are you okay?" He asked still a little out of breath, you pulled yourself back to face him as you noded "yeah I'm fine just my hips hurt a little" you chuckled. Aki then cupped your face and pulled you in for a soft loving kiss "I'm sorry" he whispered softly against your lips making you blush. This was only the first of many rounds..

[carefulfears]

can you pleeeease please pls pls talk about piper maru/apocrypha theeee apex of the early myth arc obviously i just rewatched it and also you rewatched it a few months ago but i rly would like to hear you get super into it. talk about watever you please but i wld love 2 hear stuff about specific scenes/line or plot implications or performances or technical stuff you liked or what have you. i love you xoxo mikey

okay coming back to this because we just watched these together lol but the thing about piper maru/apocrypha is that like...they speak so much for themselves. and they have a lot to say, about the core themes of the series. it's not just the apex of the myth-arc, it's a subtle love letter of everything that the show believes in.

firstly, i've said this before, but that opening sequence of first scully and skinner, then scully and mulder, is so much of what it all boils down to. and, almost in contrast to the rest of the arc, it's relatively loving and hopeful. just not in the sense that everyone wants things to be.

the government is not going to pursue melissa's murder investigation. the FBI does not care. those in power do not care. they have the tools and technology to piece together any crime, but, as scully says:

"in a case of a woman, my sister, who was gunned down in cold blood in a well-lit apartment building by a shooter who left the weapon at the crime scene, we can't even put together enough to keep anybody interested."

scully is always bubbling with this benevolent indignant rage, just under the surface, and it's so moving when it breaks. it's her sister. and no one is even interested.

it matters that skinner tells her that he's fighting it, he's going to appeal. he's going to go over all of the evidence personally, make sure nothing was overlooked. i love the way he tells her that he got the memo last night and debated calling her at home, you can tell that he's been sitting with it all night.

when she goes downstairs, and mulder is buzzing about some ship wreckage that he's already researched coordinates and weather and radiation spots before anyone else got there that morning, the way she smiles is the end of any confusion as to why she stays. it's been 23 years since the last time anyone cared about his dead sister, and he's down there digging. ("i'm just...constantly amazed by you.")

it's nice that someone stays interested. it's nice to spend your life with someone who cares, when no one else does.

later, in san francisco, i always cry when scully drives onto the military base where she grew up, and sees the kids playing. and it flashes to the kids as her and melissa. once again, this episode is a love letter to everything this show believes.

and when she speaks to her old neighbor, it's spelled out in my favorite quote of the franchise: "we bury our dead alive, don't we?"

i always think of @scullysflannel's post on this thematic arc:

But then I also think about “we bury our dead alive” and “nothing disappears without a trace” and how The X-Files is always in conversation with its ghosts...It matters that the show is saying both everything ends and nothing’s ever really over. You can’t stop moving forward, but there’s also a duty to remember, both out of love (“I want to remember how it was”) and to prevent the same things from happening to anyone else. The future won’t be any better unless people honor the ones who came before. Progress on The X-Files is this constant push and pull between hope and tragedy; you can’t have one without the other.

the x-files is always in conversation with its ghosts, and everything buried still speaks.

when the first installment of this two-parter ends, skinner is shot for his unwillingness to abandon melissa's case. and krycek's soul is overridden with visible darkness, before mulder's eyes.

(i also want to talk about krycek lying, in the airport, and telling mulder that he didn't kill his father. but i think that may be a larger post on krycek/mulder and trust.)

(it literally can't be stressed enough that krycek briefly becomes an alien in this episode and mulder doesn't notice. mikey like that one time you were like "if i were possessed by a demon and a guy who i know personally sat next to me on a twenty hour flight and didn't notice at all i would be so mad")

moving on to apocrypha...well...the x-files is about love, you guys. i love scully running into the hospital and holding skinner's hand. most of this episode is a whirlwind of allies, of understandings. and a testament to how much it matters, to have allies. to have someone you can call. to have three friends who will pull off an elaborate ice-rink locker heist. to have someone who will come hold your hand, chase down an ambulance to watch over you.

back at the FBI, pendrell breaks down the data they've collected on skinner's shooter. partial prints and saliva and secretors and hemofactors and chromosome-stains and hair fibers. i love the run-down that they give, it really drives home the point that scully was making in the beginning. they have all of this equipment and all of these resources and all of this science. but what does it matter when no one cares enough to follow through?

ultimately, it's scully that pieces together the evidence, and realizes that the man who shot skinner is the same man who killed melissa. (at the same time, the syndicate is starting to grow impatient with CSM, as the man suspected in the shooting is: "one of yours, isn't he?")

but in the end, there's nothing. they're pulled out of the silos without finding any evidence. they lose krycek, after learning of his involvement. the man who killed melissa is dead in his cell. "nothing vanishes without a trace," but everything can be controlled.

when mulder goes to melissa's grave to tell scully that cardinale is dead, it's one of my favorite details of the series that he's holding flowers. it just makes me tear up that he stopped to bring missy flowers. even though he was just going by to tell scully news. (it was only a year ago that it was missy sitting having coffee with him, or banging on his apartment door. that it was missy who didn't give up on him, when scully was gone. these sisters linger. there's a kind of reverent respect.)

"You know I thought... when we found him, this man that killed Melissa, that...that when we brought him to justice, I would feel some kind of closure. But the truth is no court...no punishment is ever enough."

four years before the show concludes "there is no closure," scully quietly betrays, there is no closure. nothing would ever be enough. her sister is gone. there are no answers, there is no justice, that would make it better. (and what a statement to make)

and the episode ends on scully repeating back: "maybe we bury the dead alive."

as we cut to krycek, locked in the missile silo, banging on the door, crying, screaming for help.

it is on this note that the x-files leaves its most thematically relevant arc. there is no closure. we bury our dead alive. and no one is ever coming to save you.

[fraudkuna]

“i think i’ve only ever been wasting my time all this time, doing nothing.”

“i don’t know about that.” gojo says. “there’s something special about standing still, isn’t there? look at us now, we were at each other’s throats just seconds ago.”

you wait for the usual fire that blooms at gojo’s taunts to fuel a witty response, but the temperature is less hot than you remember. it just makes you warm.

you breath the feeling out and wait to see if it’ll leave with your exhale. when it stays, you smile. “it feels like i’ve been standing still forever. i don’t remember the last time i felt like i’ve done anything productive.”

“that’s harsh.”

“it’s true though.”

“why do you think you need to do well?”

“because what else was i put on earth for? it feels disgusting knowing that i can’t fulfil anything, that i haven’t yet. it’s not like i’m unfortunate or anything, i have everything i need to make something of myself but i just can’t. and all this time while i can’t, everyone else can.”

“no one has it figured out. we’re all just faking.”

you shake your head. “it doesn’t matter because to me, it feels like i’ve been left behind. and how i feel is all that matters.”

the wind fills the silence before you speak again.

“i wonder how people do it.”

“do what?”

you gesture vaguely at everything. “well, life is hard, you know? the thought that all of my life and all that’ll come after, i’ll only ever be disappointing myself or failing or missing opportunities and missing timings that might just make my life better and more meaningful but it doesn’t matter because i missed it. there’ll be good things, sure, but the bad things are just, i can’t look forward to that.”

“like tripping in front of the person you like.” gojo nods wisely.

“like stumbling over your words.”

“like submitting the wrong file to your lecturer.”

“knocking over a glass of water.”

“running into a pretty girl and pressing your shoulder into her hands which were holding a sandwich thus causing mayo to drip down her shirt.”

you squint over at him. “that one sounded real.”

he waves away your concern. “i thought this was a safe space but i guess not.”

“whatever.” you laugh faintly. “i just, i don’t know. it’s hard. and i know i have no right saying something like that when all my life i’ve been privileged with education and caring parents but i, i can’t be happy and it’s all my fault.”

“you can��t help it, it’s the chemicals in your brain.”

“and what is that brain connected to?”

gojo sighs. “will depressing thoughts make your life better then?”

“no, but it’s the only thing that comes out.”

“i know you probably don’t want me to sprout words you’ve already heard before, but they’re popular statements for a reason.”

“i know.”

“does that mean you want to hear them?”

“no. i already know what you’re going to say anyway. i’m not a lost cause, gojo, i know what’s wrong with me and why it happens. i just can’t make it go away."

“you know i can’t do that.” gojo smiles. “this is your fight, won’t it be cheap if i lend you a hand? it’ll only be a temporary solution.”

you groan. “like a bandaid.”

“and scars are uglier than fresh wounds. might as well deal with it now.”

"don't say that. i think scars are beautiful."

"on everyone but you."

you frown. “what are you saying? what should i do?”

“weren’t you listening? that’s something for you to figure out.”

“what was the meaning of this conversation then?”

“was there a meaning? i thought you just wanted to rant.”

you blow a raspberry and fall backwards, starfishing on the grass. gojo joins you soon after and his pinky lightly brushes yours as if in silent support. there’s little to say at a time like this, and whatever there may be is small talk at best. so you close your mouth.

unresolved, unfinished, the feeling only tastes worse.

stars fly across the sky. while it feels as though every minute has you chained by the feet, the world will continue anyway.

you close your eyes against the night and push these feelings back for one more day.

[sixhours]

Twenty questions for fanfic writers

Ermagerd I love talking fanfic, thanks @numinousmysteries!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

24

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

379,370

3. What fandoms do you write for?

The X-Files and The Last of Us so far!

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

All X-Files fics:

A Boy and His Fox

Morning Sickness

Waking Hours

Remnants

We Aren't Meant to Sleep Alone

5. Do you respond to comments?

Most of the time, even if it's just a simple "Thank you!"

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

My Umbra Reverie series, by far. 😬 No regrets!

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

A Boy and His Fox or One Day at a Time. Two different fandoms, both baby fics. I originally envisioned One Day at a Time as a TLOU variation on A Boy and His Fox--a bunch of drabbles strung together--but it turned into a more cohesive story over time.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Nope.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Sure! If it serves the story, I'll write smut. I'm not big on writing porn without plot because I don't think smut is my strong suit. When I do write smut, it's pretty vanilla, nothing too kinky.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I haven't, but I'm currently outlining a TLOU period fic that's based on Anne of Green Gables. Not quite a crossover, but boy it's fun to think about. 😆

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not that I know of!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nope, I'd be too afraid of letting my co-authors down. 😂

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

Mulder and Scully are my OTP. ❤️

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

As of right now I don't have any. I tend to start fics with a lot of preparation, outlining, and research, and I usually wait until they're mostly finished to publish them. I also tend to work on one fic at a time and focus until it's mostly done.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I strive to make my characters as true to the source material and as believable as possible. I want the reader to be able to hear the character's voice in their head as they read, or be able to imagine them in a scene like it were on screen.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Editing while I write. 🙃 It's why I'm so slooooooow.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I don't speak any other languages and I'm uncomfortable leaning solely on translation software, but I'm not opposed to trying if it serves the story. My headcanon for TLOU is my Joel stays pretty true to the HBO series in that he's Latino, but he doesn't speak Spanish in regular conversation (I imagine he can, but he doesn't). (Trust that I noticed Tommy's "Adios, big brother" in episode 6, but then apparently Joel says that in the game, so...? I've thought about this too much.)

19. First fandom you wrote for?

The X-Files, when I was 14. Those fics are still in .txt files somewhere on my computer. Someday I'll dig them out and have a good laugh.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Total recency bias, but The Ghosts of Babylon is my favorite right now. Mostly because I love the Reader character and it was my first foray into writing for a fandom other than The X-Files and I think I pulled it off. 🥹

🏷️ No pressure tags! Tell me about your fics! @frannyzooey, @wannab-urs, @bumblepony, @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin, @march-flowerr, @wildemaven and anyone else who wants to give this a whirl.

[pilesofpillows]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Tagged by my beloved 🌶️🧠^2 @xenokattz

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

16 😁😁

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

118, 025

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Black Panther: Wakanda Forever is my main obsession, but I do have a Harry Potter fic in the works that desperately needs an update. I've also been thinking about dipping into the Scandal fandom 🫣

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Primetime - Attoye PWP

Bound in Pleasure - Attoye PWP

An Angel, Drowned (Excerpt) - Namor/Okoye/Attuma PWP (whole fic is in progress)

Stars Within - Attoye (quite possibly the sweetest thing i've ever written in my existence)

Stars Aglow - Attoye (the second sweetest thing i've ever written in my existence

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do indeed! At least I do my best. I enjoy getting feedback and finding out how readers are feeling about the story and the characters. It's really the best part of sharing my writing with y'all 🥰

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Nothing... yet... 😬 I don't really have a plan for angsty endings, I angst to for the happy stuff 😁

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

The happiest I would say is either Stars Within or Stars Aglow (the actual ending is coming istg)

8. Do you get hate on fics?

My HP fic caught some hate because some people don't enjoy Black Hermione and that is what it is... I don't really care. The BPWF fandom has been nothing but welcoming and they have my entire heart 🤗

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

LMFAO yes 😂🤣🤣 Mind you, I just started in March and the majority of my fics are rated E 💀 but I write all kinds of smut and will be writing a lot more in the future 😁

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

There is a Narnia/Harry Potter fic in my personal drafts because I adore both fandoms. I might find the courage to post it one day 💀

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I certainly hope not

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nopenopenope... but many requests

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

LOL no... I don't share well but I'm always happy to plot with my besties 😜

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

I feel like this answer is pretty obvious but um Attoye (who's surprised 🤣)

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Sadly... Sunbound. It's entirely possible that I'll come back to it, but the vibe keeps drifting and I've got other things to work on 😅😅

16. What are your writing strengths?

World-building for sure... it's my favorite part. I've also been told I'm good with characterization(?) but idk... I just write what feels right.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

It takes me a ridiculously long time to write scenes my brain doesn't looooove. I also can't write things out of order, which is what takes updates so long 💀

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I like to do it for brief phrases, a few sentences, and terms of endearment, but full conversations just get a note that they're happening in a different language. I like to put English translations in brackets for the differing languages I use, and I try my best to find the most accurate translations, but I don't speak Yucatec Maya or Xhosa 😂

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Publicly: Harry Potter

In the secret file on my laptop? Game of Thrones 😬

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

It's not done yet, but Like Real People Do is going to end up being one of the best things I ever write. At least until that angsty crazy thing I'm planning comes out. 😁

Soft Sweet Tags: @umber-cinders @jbarneswilson @theeblackmedusa

[crownmemes]

The X-Files Sentences, Vol. 9

(Sentences from The X-Files (1993-2002, 2016-2018). Adjust phrasing where needed)

"I have seen my share of the hideous, of the disgusting, and the repellent, but you are the most perfect expression I will ever see of all that is vile and hateful in life."

"Is it me, or is this becoming an odd conversation?"

"I'm so scared that I've just got you back and now I'm going to lose you again."

"There's a truth even you're afraid to speak."

"The way I look at it, calling something paranormal is just a way of avoiding a real explanation."

"You damn me for my secrets, but you're afraid to speak the truth."

"You say that you've failed, but you only fail if you give up."

"You've always said that you want to believe, but believe in what?"

"If this is the truth that you've been looking for, then what is left to believe in?"

"You've become awfully trusting for a man wanted by the FBI."

"This isn't my life anymore. I'm done chasing monsters in the dark."

"I can feel you thinking."

"This stubbornness of yours is why I fell in love with you."

"You just calm the hell down, before we both get pissed off."

"I don't take orders from you."

"I haven't known pleasure for quite some time."

"You know me; I'm old-school."

"You're never just anything to me."

"What would you do if you were a werewolf?"

"You've seen one serial killer, you've seen them all."

"I can see that you're going through a questioning phase of some sort."

"The internet is not good for you."

"It's easier to believe in monsters out there in the world than to accept that the real monsters dwell within us."

"Not everything can be reduced to psychology."

"I don't mean to intrude, but you seem to have something weighing heavily on you."

"Maybe I was just a fool. Maybe I always have been."

"I believe that you will find all of your answers. You will find the answers to the biggest mysteries, and I will be there when you do."

"You spent all of five minutes with them. How do you know that?"

"I'm hardly known as a humble man."

"I'm not a bad man - more, a practical man."

"I've endured my hatred more than you'll ever know. My enemies are legion."

"You want to see me snap?"

"Truth is fluid and alterable."

"You really get off on this, don't you?"

"Can we talk about this over dinner? Please?"

"Does that get your juices flowing?"

"Time had a way of shedding light on injustices."

"You really don't give up, do you? But then, you have so much to lose."

"I never fathomed a moment would come when I would need to end your life."

"I don't think you can do it."

[kanwaly]

Captain Lily Part 1

There was a girl named Lily.

She was known for her infectious laughter

and friendly nature, always surrounded by a group of friends.

Lily believed that her friends were genuine and kind, never suspecting that they would betray her trust.

One day, Lily stumbled upon a conversation where her so-called friends were mocking her appearance and speaking ill of her behind her back. The realization hit her like a tidal wave, and she felt a deep sense of regret for ever believing in their friendship.

She blamed herself for being naive and selfish, thinking only of their perspective.

As time went on, Lily began to change.

The once innocent and carefree girl started

to build walls around her heart,She withdrew from her friends, focusing on her own personal growth and goals.

Lily made the decision to take a

break from school, giving herself time to heal and reflect on the mistakes she had made.

She confronted her own shortcomings and realized that she had allowed others to define her worth. It was a harsh awakening, and she resolved to never let anyone have that power over her again.

When Lily returned to school after her hiatus, she was a changed person. Her once warm and friendly demeanor had been replaced by a cold and distant aura.

She no longer sought the company of others,

choosing instead to focus on her own ambition.

The transformation was palpable, and

her classmates could sense the darkness that

enveloped her.Lily carried this newfound persona with her into college, where she continued to excel academically.

Her dream of becoming a respected military officer burned brightly within her, and she poured all her energy into achieving that goal.She applied to join

the military and,to her delight, was selected.

And so, Lily embarked on her path as a respected military officer,carrying with her the scars of her past but also the strength that came from overcoming adversity.

She had transformed from an

innocent girl into a resilient woman,

ready to face any challenge that came her way.

After soo much hustle and hard training

she become a captain and start leading after some time she become world famous women officer who is brave and intelligent to overcome anything she called "LEADER OF LEADERS" in all the world

Wherever she goes everyone respect her love her she has an cold , but kind and good person era she is a nightmare for the criminals they even afraid of her name.

PRESENT TIME

IN PRESS CONFERENCE

"Captain Lily What do you think who is involve in this recent crimes?"

"Captain Lily who can be this people that are causing trouble in presence of you?,since

you become the leader no one dare to cause any trouble but now once again someone dare to do it."

Captain Lily:"Calm down! I"ll not let them go just wait and watch,I am working on it"

Reporters :"As you say Captain we have faith on you"

Captain Lily Smile and says: "I am glad that you all have faith on me,I will definitely put them behind the bars,Just one thing I request from you all to be patient."

Captain Lily further says : "Judging from your all faces you all are probably scared,listen to me carefully don't you all forget that you all have my Office contact

number you can call it on anytime your call won't be go unheard Understood!"

"Don't you all worry I will caught them soon"

They all unitedly says :"Yes! captain Lily

we believe in you Good luck for this mission!!"

CONFERENCE OVER

Late at night ,Captain Lily was checking files and then she received an anonymous call

ON CALL

Captain Lily :"Hello! How can I help you" in her deep voice

The caller :How is your work going on recent case.? Are you having difficulties?That's why you r still in your office late at night.?He laughs mysteriously and before

lily say anyting he hangs up

Captain Lily:"Who he was?,let's leave it for now,I will further study this case after

taking a fresh break when I will reach home."

AT HOME

She enter in house welcome by her mother

sitting on a couch watching TV

lily asks :"Mama! You r still up"

Lily's mother: "I was waiting for you ,I always tell you to cover your work early and come home how many enemies you have lily, I know you r very strong but...

Lily says: "Mama Mama my

sweet mama sorry for making you feel worried but you don't have to worry a little a litttleee about me no one can do anything to me,don't you know how smart your daughter is"lily wink at her mom while giggling her mom also laughs

Lily's mother:"Hahaha I should record your video everone says you r emotionaless"

Lily :"That version is only for you all"

with a serious tone

Lily's mother:"ohhh come come have some food Captain Lily, everyone says that you don't eat nor sleep"says while laughing

Lily :"Mama stop teasing "

They both laughs

Lily:Btw others are sleeping?

Mother: "They all did dinner early,so they went to bed but you know your siblings,do this type of creatures sleep early?"

Lily:Definitely not!!😆

After taking a cold shower lily again sit

to study about this recent fuss

she remind of that anonymous call.

Lily:"No one could ever dare to talk to me like that who was he talking to me like that.

I should give this number to her.

She will find a way to track it No matter

how much it is protected."

At call

Lily : Hey Sophia! I have a work for you

track this number I just send you ,I want details about this number until 3pm tomorrow it's urgent!!

Sophia :"Ok Captain I will try my best"

Lily :"Best of Luck"

CALL END

Lily :"I know my six sense is not lying this call must be related to this case ,the similar thing is in both are daring

1.The caller, he dare to talk to me straight

2. The people who are making fuss even knowing that

what I did with the previous ones.

I THINK THEY DONT LOVE THEIR LIVES!!!

Behind their these Fearless activities there is someone that gives them strength to do it

I think He/She really thinks that they are

enough smarter than me.OK, LET'S SEE WHO IS SMARTER THAN WHOM!!!

GOOD NIGHT 🌃

"One more special thing about Lily

she wears a black mask which she

doesn't took off only closest one has seen lily's face."

TO BE CONTINUED

let's see what information Sophia

Will bring in next part!!

LIKE SHARE

© By Kanwal

[narratingvoice]

How do you deal with writer’s block?

Ahhh, writer's block. The most relatable and universal of terrors. Is there anything more frightening than staring down at the white abyss of the empty page? Is there any pain more acute than being unable to wrest the words out of your head and into a story? No, surely not. (In fact, you'll never believe why I took several days to respond to this ask.) But I have been a writer for a long time, so by necessity I have devised a few methods of coping with the looming dread. Here are a couple of tips:

Write as if you're talking

One of the most common reasons for writer's block is that you want your writing to be perfect. Of course you do, why wouldn't you? But you keep going over the words in your mind over and over before you even write them down, and that's the problem. You need to think of it like you're having a conversation with a silent companion. When you chat with a friend, you don't look back at the sentence you just said and think "that was rubbish". You just let it be part of the conversation. And I for one am certainly known for my grandiloquence when speaking orally; in fact I'd say it's one of my best features. So just write down something, anything, that says the thing you want to say. Then once you've said it, you can rewrite it over and over again until it's perfect. Don't move on to the next section until you've polished it to a mirror sheen.

2. Have a punching bag

I don't mean a literal punching bag, although you certainly could use one if you so desire. I mean you need to have something harmless that you can unleash your built-up frustration on. One cannot craft a thrilling narrative when one's mind is clouded by self-doubt. My punching bag is a large plush tyrannosaurus I call Muriel. I like to take her to a nice dark out-of-bounds area where no one can see me, and hug her tightly to my chest while I let out an uninterrupted scream for as long as I possibly can. (This is usually several hours.) If I am feeling especially angry, I will punch her, bite her, and throw her at a wall until I calm down. And if that still doesn't work then I will drop Stanley into the void for a quick laugh.

3. Re-read your old stuff

If you ever have doubt about your ability to create believable dialogue and character, all you need to do is take a trip down memory lane. Simply read something you wrote in the past, and if you're anything like me, your heart will fill with a swell of pride and accomplishment. You can write! You've done it before and you'll do it again! I recommend making a binder, file folder, or shrine containing all your past works, so you can easily find them and remember them whenever you want. Oh, and if you published them in a place where you can get comments or reviews, save and print out all the good ones. That way you will know that it's not just your ego; other people enjoy your creative ability as well.

Do not save the bad ones. That will not lead to anything good. Trust me on this one.

If this is your first time writing anything, make up some imaginary good reviews that you think should exist once the work is finished, and look at them.

4. Use spite

It may seem counter-intuitive, but spite is actually a fantastic motivator for getting work done. What you need to do is find an author you really hate and read a bit of their work. In no time at all, you will be thinking to yourself, "I can definitely write something better than this dreck. If this can get published then so can I!" For me, all it takes is a couple of chapters of any Tom Clancy novel. Just be careful you don't read so much that it drives you into a murderous rage; if that happens, revert to tip #2 above.

And that's all I can think of for now! Good luck, and know that I believe in you! You have a story worth telling!